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ahundredtimesover · 8 months

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I Want You to Stay (05) | JJK

Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader

Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut

Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; eventual explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)

Chapter Word count: 14.8k

Series Masterlist

Status: Ongoing

Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You’ve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.

Playlist 🎶: on the way home

A/N: I deeply appreciate all the love and messages (and anticipation for uh, stuff) but again, it's a slow burn! Thank you so much! 🥰

And as always, my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight 🥰

PS. If I can’t tag you, pls fix your settings!

Jungkook sits cross-legged on the couch in his office, his iPad in hand as he goes through the Board report for the nth time these past five days.

Manager Lee and Chin-sun have put together the logistics, construction, and design departments’ reports with the VP’s and Jungkook is supposed to sign these off for submission to the CEO today, who then approves it for submission to the Board members. They have until Friday to review it in time for the meeting happening that same day.

This consolidated report was finalized last Wednesday and Jungkook has been reviewing it everyday since then, including his presentation, making minimal comments and then taking notes on things he’s unfamiliar with. Granted, he’s reporting about the quarter when he’s only been Vice President for a month, which makes you incredibly instrumental in his preparations. As the executive assistant, you have the information that Jungkook needs from Hoseok’s time, and so you’ve also been spending everyday since Wednesday answering all of Jungkook’s questions.

You don’t mind, really, as they’re details you know by heart. It also allows you to show him how involved and meticulous you were under Hoseok’s leadership, and Jungkook’s hums and mumbles of appreciation have helped you gain back the confidence that you lost.

Even if your self-esteem decreased this past month because of the very person sitting in front of you, the fact that Jungkook’s been showing - in his own ways - his trust in you is enough to lift your spirits. He did admit last week that he needs you - something you hadn’t expected him to say - and you could tell it took so much from him to be able to verbalize it. But you suppose you needed that honesty, too; you needed to know that after all that frustration and anger during the first few weeks, there was that realization on his end that you have his back, and you’re just as capable as what everyone has been saying you are.

“What information do you need from me, Mr. Jeon?” You finally ask.

It’s been a good five minutes since Jungkook had asked for you and you’ve just been standing in front of him while he scrolls through the screen, perhaps giving another final look before he finally sends the document to his father.

“Nothing,” he sighs, rolling his head back and closing his eyes. “I just… I just need someone to tell me to stop reviewing this report. I need this out of my sight but I can’t stop checking to make sure everything is okay.”

You look at him intently while he speaks. The tension in his entire face and body is visible, you can even feel it in the room. You feel for him, as he tries to hide the anxiety and desperation. You can tell that he just wants to do well so badly. With the amount of time he’s been spending just going through this, his perfectionist tendency surfaces, and you’re at least thankful that it hasn’t turned him back into an asshole. At least not yet.

“You need to stop reviewing the report, Mr. Jeon, and let it go,” you say as instructed but with sincerity in your words. “You’ve been on this for days. Manager Lee and Chin-sun have reviewed it, and so have I. CEO Jeon could still suggest changes and we won’t know them until he’s reviewed it, but we at least have the details ironed out. If I may suggest, you can send the file to him in the next hour so you can now focus on practicing for your presentation. That may be a better use of your time.”

Jungkook opens his eyes and turns to you. There’s assurance in your words and your voice and like what he told himself he’d do, he’ll trust you and the team. He’s seen how hard everyone has been working for this - Manager Lee and Chin-sun have done so well in consolidating and cross-checking everything; Do-hyun’s presentation is simple yet effective, and Yohan, who’s back from the hospital, has been adding in all the needed details. And there’s you, making sure that everything and everyone is on track, even as you prepare for Jungkook’s upcoming events.

“Okay, then,” he exhales deeply. “I’ll send it in the next half hour.”

Knowing he has a meeting set at 2PM, you ask him if you should order him lunch.

“Yes please,” he answers, saying he wants some braised beef from the restaurant on the next block. “Order for yourself as well, and the rest of the team. You can all get anything you want.”

The silence prompts Jungkook to look at you, and he’s met with a questioning gaze.

“Is there a problem?” He asks.

“N—no,” you answer. “I’d like to confirm again that I’ll be ordering lunch for you and all five of us.”

“Yes, Ms. Cho. That’s what I said.”

You remain unmoving as you wait for him to correct himself. This is the first time that Jungkook has offered to treat the team to a meal. Not that you’ve been waiting for it, but Hoseok took you all out to dinner on his first day as a welcome and a thanks in advance, and once you picked up that Jungkook wasn’t the type to engage with his staff much, you just didn’t expect anything. So takeaway lunch from a nice restaurant is definitely surprising.

“Okay, sir,” you say. “I will do that. I’m sure the team will appreciate it.”

Jungkook merely hums, his eyes focused on the screen now as you bow and head out.

You go meet the team and as you expected, everyone looks at you in shock.

“Did the real Mr. Jeon get abducted?” Do-hyun asks. “Because treating us is something he wouldn’t do.”

“Yah! It may be a month late but let’s just be thankful, okay?” You frown at her. “He can see that everyone’s been working hard and I’m sure he appreciates that, and he may not be able to say it but he can at least show us.”

“While he’s at it, he can maybe at least say thank you or you know, smile every once in a while,” Chin-sun sighs.

“We’ll get there. He knows he needs to do better and he will, I’ll make sure of that,” you assure them, thinking about the conversation from last week.

Jungkook wants you to help him and for his sake and everyone else’s, you’ll make sure that you do.

“Well, is he better to you?” Do-hyun asks, her face in a pout because she’s seen you skip meals several times and even cry, and she’d wanted so many times to just hug you, but she knows it’s not something you openly receive.

“Yes,” you say, knowing it will drive your point. “I’d like to think that the worst is over and I can just focus on doing better and helping him. It would be great if the rest of us could do the same.”

“She’s right,” Manager Lee chimes in. “We grow when we adapt, and much more when we’re able to move on and learn from our experiences. It hasn’t been the best month but it’s also just been a month. So let’s be grateful for the meal and just continue with the good work we’ve been doing, okay?”

You give them the warmest smile you can muster, hoping this would be enough.

It seems to be, as they all excitedly give their orders, which you and Yohan pick up from the restaurant. You return and after giving Jungkook his food, you head to the other room to eat as well.

The team enjoys the meal, with Do-hyun dramatically stating that it’s the best beef brisket she’s ever had. And you agree; there’s a reason why Jungkook gets this every week.

Jungkook can hear laughter and satisfied hums from the support team office, with Do-hyun, he supposes, claiming that it feels like Christmas. Yohan says it’s a much-needed post-recovery treat, and even Manager Lee - who’s often serious - cracks a few jokes. Jungkook can pick out your sound, too, noting the joy that emanates from it. He allows himself a small smile, knowing that given how he’s been to everyone this past month, he at least could give his team this highlight of their day.

He stands by the door, initially going unnoticed, until Chin-sun catches sight of him and alerts everyone that he’s there. The room goes silent, and Jungkook looks on as his staff quietly munch their food and bow to him in greeting. The teasing and laughter have gone; worried eyes are what he sees instead.

Your initial surprise at seeing him melts away. He rarely drops by for anything, even for a greeting or to just check up on the team, unlike Hoseok who liked to come here often to de-stress after long meetings. But you sense Jungkook’s awkwardness at the silence, with his hands in his pockets and his blank gaze, so you smile at him and hope that eases the tension a bit.

“Lunch was great, Mr. Jeon,” you say. “Thank you.”

“It was,” Manager Lee pipes in. “The roast pork was so delicious. The potato salad was very good, too.”

You look at the others and encourage them to say something as well, and they hum in agreement and say their thanks.

“The beef brisket was heavenly,” Do-hyun raves. “Thank you! I hope it’s not the last time.”

She awkwardly chuckles, realizing that her boss isn’t one she should be joking with, but Jungkook doesn’t seem to take offense, as he purses his lips - perhaps to hide a smile, revealing a tiny dimple that catches you off guard.

“It won’t be. And uh, it was a month late, so I’m glad you all enjoyed it,” he replies, a tinge of disappointment now painting his face.

There’s another moment of silence and you observe him, hands still in his pockets, looking around awkwardly, unable to meet anyone’s eyes.

“It’s greatly appreciated, sir,” you assure him once more. “We hope you had a good lunch as well.”

“I’m just about to have it, actually,” he says. “I sent the report to the CEO and he must’ve been waiting for it because he read it right away and called to give feedback.”

“Oh? How did CEO Jeon find it?” Manager Lee asks.

“He said it was good. There are just minor things he asked me to change but I can do them on my own,” Jungkook answers. “I appreciate everyone’s hard work. Now, we can focus on our upcoming events and the Arts Center.”

The team immediately starts packing and swallowing their food, and Jungkook has to stop them.

“Not right now,” he clarifies. “Continue with your meal. And don’t stay too late. We’ve got another busy week ahead.”

“Yes, Mr. Jeon,” everyone says in unison.

Jungkook nods and starts walking away, leaving all five of you with confused looks, as Jungkook has never spoken to the team in such a calm and friendly manner. It was always firm and professional, low and stoic.

You scurry out the room and follow him. Jungkook gives you a questioning look when you enter his office shortly after he does, and you pick up his untouched lunch from the table and inform him that you’ll heat it up, knowing he doesn’t like to eat his food cold.

You go back to the pantry then return to Jungkook’s room, his beef brisket dish now properly placed in a bowl. He gives you a nod, his form of acknowledgment and thanks, you suppose, and you ask the question you’ve had since his earlier stop at the team’s office.

“Are the edits really just minor?” You wonder, knowing that CEO Jeon is meticulous and quite particular with these board reports.

Jungkook takes a moment to respond. He should know that you’ve done this a few times and are probably used to how his father is already, which means you’d see right through him as well.

“Well, they’re not major,” Jungkook says. “I mean, they’re not trivial corrections. The details are all good but I need to change some terminologies and framing and some construction of the sections based on the Board’s current concerns, especially about the Arts Center. They’re not that substantial but it’ll still take me an hour or so.”

“Why did you tell the team that they were minor, then?”

“So they won’t offer to help.”

“But they would. I would,” you tell him. “It’s our job.”

“I was going to ask, but it’s your break time. Everyone was enjoying their meals and each other. First time I’ve seen that, actually. I know it doesn’t happen when I’m around.”

“It’s just that you’re not—”

“Hoseok,” he finishes for you.

“Not someone they’re comfortable being themselves around,” you correct him.

“Yes, not like Hoseok,” he pushes.

“You said it the first day, Mr. Jeon. You do things very differently from your cousin. Your personalities are very different, too. We had him for three years and for Yohan and Do-hyun, he was their first boss,” you explain. “They’re just not used to you yet.”

“What about you? Are you used to me by now?”

There’s sudden tension in the room as he looks at you with the desire for honesty, and it’s what you give.

“I’m not quite sure.”

Jungkook doesn’t really know what he expected, as the question just slipped past his mouth before he could pull it back, so he just nods and proceeds to take his late lunch, wanting to forget that he’d asked at all.

You take this as a signal to head out, which you do, before reminding him that he can ask you for help if he needs another pair of eyes before he submits his part again. Jungkook just nods once more, and it’s later in the day, after the third cup of coffee that you take to his room, that he says his father’s already approved the version he sent after you went through it upon his request. You know that’s just half of what he needs to do though, as he’ll still need to present it to the Board this coming Friday.

“You may go home, Ms. Cho,” he says after he signs some documents for you.

“How about you, Mr. Jeon?” You ask.

It’s been a long day, an extension of an even longer weekend because he’d been at a work event and then reviewed the report as well.

“I’ll probably stay back and go over the presentation. Maybe practice a little.”

You purse your lips, holding something back.

“Should I not?” He wonders.

“Just thinking that it might be better for you to take a proper rest tonight,” you advise.

“I’ll think about it. It’s gonna be a tough one on Friday and I want to be prepared.”

“I understand,” you smile. “I’ll go ahead, Mr. Jeon.”

Jungkook holds your gaze for a while before he nods and returns to his screen, going through the presentation slides and the notes he scribbled on his iPad. But try as he might, the graphs and the words just go over his head.

He does need to rest, he thinks. He hasn’t really taken a break all weekend. His hookup from last night was the only relief he got, but that was to expend all the negative energy from the anxiety and stress, and he realizes that he probably doesn’t know what proper rest is, like what you suggested he have. He wonders if you’ve ever had one, or if it’s something you stopped having ever since you started working for him.

Taking your advice, he heads out. It’s only been 30 minutes and he assumes you’re already on the bus and on the way home. He sits in the passenger seat, letting Mr. Ri’s choice of music fill the car as Jungkook’s mind wanders to you - how you laughed at the team’s antics, how you got them to assure him, how you read him well, how you were patient and helpful, and how you seemed concerned about how tired he’s been.

He’ll chalk it up to you doing your job and helping him as he asked you to do; he always will. He can’t ever think that any of your actions mean more even if deep down, he wishes they do, only so he knows that you don’t hate him, that you’ve forgiven him for things he never apologized for, that you’ll stay for as long as possible. There’s something about your honesty and calm presence that stabilizes him, that makes him take a pause.

Jungkook’s worked hard on his career for the past decade and it’s all he focuses on; it’s all he thinks about. But when you’re there, he’s forced to stop and think about you. He’s noticed that just this past week - when you’re around, he listens; when you’re close to him, he breathes. Ironic, really, considering that every time you close the distance - when you fix his tie or look at his screen over his shoulder or help him retrieve portfolios - he remains still, his heart stopping and his throat drying up, afraid to take in your scent or to know just how fast his pulse would race or what words he’d say that he won’t be able to contain.

He’s afraid to know you, only because what he’ll learn might make him want you. And Jungkook knows that he can’t let himself feel that about you in any way.

He sighs as he looks out the window - cars in line to cross the intersection, people walking to their destination. He thinks he’s hallucinating as he sees your smile, but a bus blocks his view and Mr. Ri steps on the gas.

Outside, you smile to yourself as you wait in line. You were held up at the lobby because Bitna caught you in the elevator and didn’t want to let you go just yet, so you left the office just minutes ago and were waiting at the bus stop when a familiar car showed up and you saw Jungkook looking out the window. He opted to leave early, too; you can only hope he’ll take your advice and rest tonight.

But the thought that what you said prompted him to take a pause from work stirs something within. Maybe it’s because he’s finally listening to you, or that it seems like he trusts you now. Whatever it is, for as long as it makes your job bearable, you’re all for it.

It doesn’t take away from the moments you’ve shared where it seems like the world stops for a bit as you hold each other’s gazes for the shortest of seconds. There’s tension where there shouldn’t be, and there’s something different in his eyes when there used to be disdain, one which you can’t read nor identify. It leaves you still for the briefest of moments, unguarded and a little bare, as he seems to tell you something with just a look and you just don’t know what it is.

As you find a rare seat in the bus, you let the musings go. Jungkook is a man who holds in him a million thoughts a day and those moments with you seem to be his only reprieve; perhaps they’re also just instances of temporary lags or the rare silence and stoppage of everything. In some odd way, it allows you to see him as the human that he is - exhausted, unsure at times, but seemingly yearning for something.

There’s always an emotion or a thought or a word that he holds in, and you can only wish - as your relationship with him improves - that whatever it is he’s holding back, he’ll find a way to express it.

“Do you have any advice for the Board meeting?”

Jungkook slides the question in before Hoseok heads to the elevator and off to an event. They’ve just finished having a check-in with CEO Jeon, who wanted to make sure that the two of them are well-prepared for this Friday, given that presenting during these meetings and contributing to policy and strategy are crucial in their roles as President and Vice President. Jungkook won’t admit that it caused him a bit of anxiety, but he’ll surely take the chance to ask his cousin for tips on how to make sure that he doesn’t screw up.

“I do,” Hoseok answers as he holds off on pressing the button. “Ask your assistant. And then listen to what she says.”

Jungkook visibly sighs. “Hoseok, I mean it.”

“I mean it, too,” the older man replies. “If it’s anything about our strategic plan or policies, just take my lead. And it’s your very first so you’re expected to still be adjusting. If it’s about the presentation, let ___ brief you about it. She’s been with me every single time I had to present. When I was focused on what I had to say, she was focused on how the Board was reacting and how those translated to the questions they eventually asked. She’d know what you’ll need to emphasize on or who you need to be wary of.”

There’s an unsure look in Jungkook’s eyes, and Hoseok knows it isn’t about trusting you. It’s about him.

“You’re scared, aren’t you?” Hoseok asks. “What are you afraid of, Kook?”

“You know what they think of me,” Jungkook sighs. “I don’t want to screw up and give them more reasons to doubt me because they already do. And they’re definitely gonna ask about the Arts Center. What if they bring up my disappointing social skills? I don’t wanna end up feeling inadequate and embarrassing father.”

“Keep thinking that way and you will,” Hoseok huffs. “Look. Our family owns the company. You and I were trained to run it after my sister and your brother decided they didn’t want to. The Board knows this. They’ll either stay in our good graces or plot against us. Your father knows that, too, and that’s why he’s being hard on both of us because he knows what we’ll have to face. That also just means he’ll always be on your side. He’ll always be on ours. The Board could be intimidating but we still hold the power. They’ll impose or question or cast doubt because they want to feel that sense of control. It’ll only affect you if you let them.”

“Okay” is all that Jungkook manages to say, a tinge of resignation on his face as he takes in his cousin’s words.

“You’ve managed worse people than them,” Hoseok assured him. “Just focus, stand by your project, and engage them. Simple as that.”

“Yes, it’s very simple,” Jungkook chuckles with a shake of his head.

“Like I said, your assistant’s there for a reason, Kook. This is when I get to tell you that it’s her job. We would prepare together and debrief right after, and it always helped because she fills in gaps and informs me of things I missed. Trust me. Trust her.”

The thing is, Jungkook does; he doesn’t need to be reminded that he should trust you because he’s learned to do that, despite it seemingly impossible given that you both started off on the wrong foot. It’s the thought of spending more time with you, during a time when he’s still trying to get used to you and how you affect him, that makes him worried about this. But it’s not something he can talk about with Hoseok. It’s not something he can talk about with anyone.

“Fine,” Jungkook finally says. “I’ll talk to her.”

“Good. I’ll go now. Have dinner at home tomorrow, okay? And I’ll see you when I get back.”

Jungkook waves the older man goodbye and then returns to his office, where he finds you dropping some files off for signing.

“Payment requests for the event,” you explain, earning you a nod from him as he walks to his seat. “How did the meeting with your father go, Mr. Jeon?”

“As I expected,” he huffs. “A bit of encouragement, more of the pressure. He’d slide in reminders of what the Board thinks of me and how I should present myself.”

“Is the pressure helping?” You ask.

“A little,” he sighs, sinking into his chair and exhaling deeply. He rolls his head back and closes his eyes, allowing himself a few seconds of peace. “But I still need help. Hoseok said I can get it from you.”

“You know, he oversells me sometimes,” you manage to laugh, prompting Jungkook to look at you now. “I know I’m competent. But I don’t know about being your source of help for a Board meeting any more than providing you with data.” Jungkook likes to do things on his own after all, you think to yourself.

“But you’ve been to as many Board meetings as he has.”

“Yes, but only for his presentation.”

“And that’s what I need help with,” he says. “I just need direction, I guess. Or affirmation that how I’m doing it is the right way. Or tips on who to woo or who to not take seriously.”

Jungkook has been to a few Board meetings but he’s never had to present anything. He’s also never had to engage with the members so he didn’t pay much attention to them because he didn’t feel the need to. These appointments were all a few years too early, and while he’d had a critical position in the Southeast Asian headquarters, everything had gone through his uncle who headed the office then.

This is the first time that Jungkook feels the magnitude of all his decisions, and that every move he makes is being assessed. And even with his father and Hoseok giving him guidance, they have their own teams to manage and an entire company to run, just like him. Somehow, with all the people around him, Jungkook still feels alone.

You, with your perpetual presence and surprising warmth, are the only one who makes him feel otherwise. And it terrifies him more than anything.

“Well, I’ve picked up a few things along the way,” you hum. “I can maybe go through my notes and share them with you.”

“Good. I’d like to do that over lunch, since I’ll have you and Manager Lee watch me practice the presentation around 2.”

Jungkook picks up the slight fall of your face. “Is that a problem?” He asks. “Did you have lunch plans?”

“Nothing more important than assisting you, Mr. Jeon,” you say, a change of expression indicating that you indeed had prior commitments that you’re putting off because of him. “I’ll inform Manager Lee about meeting with him after.”

You head out and return to your desk to work on your remaining tasks for the morning until lunch time rolls by and you accompany Jungkook to a nearby restaurant as he’d asked. You try not to get too excited about the meal in front of you and then control yourself from letting out orgasmic sounds from the succulent piece of salmon that’s melting in your mouth. This check-in seems too important for Jungkook and you want to support him in any way you can.

“How was Hoseok during his first Board meeting?” Jungkook starts.

“Nervous, a little rattled. His sister left him behind with a lot of work and she was abroad for most of the time so they weren’t able to meet up,” you share. “But he got up there and presented all the office’s gains for the past months and then explained his plans moving forward. He had all these good ideas on policy and strategy and he articulated them well. He had to take over multiple small projects and he showed how he planned to manage all of them. His charms sort of hid away the anxiety he was feeling and I guess that eventually helped him get rid of it.”

“Well, that’s one thing I can’t claim that I have,” Jungkook sighs.

He looks at you to see your reaction, and the awkwardness on your face makes him internally laugh.

“I can lie to you if you want me to,” you say, and he chuckles, surprising you both, though he acts like he doesn’t mind.

“I’d actually want you to be as honest with me as possible, Ms. Cho. I don’t want you, of all people, to suck up to me to get on my good graces.”

“Great, since I wasn’t on it in the first place,” you trail, earning you another laugh, and you wish this could at least lessen the pressure he’s putting himself under.

“That’s true,” he says, holding your gaze. He turns to his food before he gets sucked in your gorgeous eyes even more. “But I mean it. I don’t exactly know how to charm people, much less the Board. I don’t want to add to the narrative they already have of me having terrible social skills. But I also don’t want them to think I’m being fake or pretentious.”

“If I may, you’ll botch that aspect if you keep thinking about it,” you advise. “Perhaps you can just focus on what you’re good at. Delivering a presentation, regardless of what it’s about, is a skill. You have all the information and I can add some more if you’re not confident with them. You also tweaked some existing processes and you can build on it. But also, the Arts Center will definitely be their focus, so talk about it the way you would with your father and the team… and me. You let us envision it with your words and your visuals and those are all you need.”

“Okay then. I’ll just imagine they’re all vegetables or something so I can focus.”

“Mrs. Doi likes making eye contact because she wants to feel like you’re conversing with her,” you say. “Mrs. Seo asks a lot of irrelevant questions but you have to answer as if they’re important. Mr. Ong likes being acknowledged every time he says something or even nods. So I don’t recommend acting as if they’re inanimate. Maybe just with Mr. Wang because he falls asleep in everything, but don’t take it personally. I think it’s a medical condition.”

Jungkook’s amused look encourages you to continue.

“Mr. Mun doesn’t really get design and building terms so you’d have to explain them at least twice. Mr. Bong tends to act all mighty but he doesn’t really know much. Same with Mr. Im and Ms. Hwa. The rest are fine,” you say. “Mr. Saito is very thoughtful. He’s a designer so his insights would be good. Ms. Cheng is unproblematic and overall just supportive. Mr. Yeon is just… there. They’re quite intense when it comes to profits and the company’s image but if you stand by what you know, they won’t really say much.”

“Wow, that’s… that’s a lot to take in. And also very informative,” Jungkook states. “I never noticed any of those.”

“Well, you had your reasons to be in those meetings and maybe you didn’t have a reason to pay attention to them,” you shrug. “I do. I thought it was an added way that I could help Mr. Jung. Assistants are asked to sit on the side of the room so we can be easily signaled for anything and I thought I could use that position to observe the Board members and see how they respond to the presentation. It helped for the succeeding ones and it took the pressure off him in terms of needing to appease them.”

“Makes sense,” Jungkook hums. “Worrying about how they’ll react or what they’ll say is half of the pressure.”

“It is. I couldn’t help Mr. Jung for his first time because it was mine, too, but he picked things up quite easily. He knew who to pay attention to.”

“Well, considering that I don’t seem to be ideal for this relationship-heavy position, I’ll have to pay attention and appease all of them, it seems.”

“If I may, Mr. Jeon, you can take it as a challenge,” you advise, feeling more comfortable in being honest now. “I may be just a humble assistant but I’ve seen things. With all the praises for Mr. Jung - which are deserved, of course - I’ve witnessed his moments of distress, which is perfectly normal for anyone. A-yeong had to remind him of how good he was everyday because he needed that push and it helped him. It also helped that he was trying to prove something and that he was always told that he had all the qualities to do that.”

“Not everyone has a supportive wife like him though. Or like my father,” Jungkook laughs dryly.

“They had supportive assistants,” you offer, trying to be optimistic. “I had to fill-in as Mr. Jung’s sounding board and I was always in awe at his approach to things.”

“Which is very different from mine, I know,” Jungkook says unintentionally, the sigh making you feel like he’s tired of the comparison, and you feel a bit bad at having to seemingly remind him of that.

“And which isn’t bad at all,” you try to assure him. “Just because it’s different, doesn’t mean it’s not right.”

Well, it wasn’t right to treat you the way I did, he wants to say, but the words stay in his head and at the tip of his tongue.

“That’s… comforting,” he says instead.

“I was trying to be assuring but comforting is fine, too,” you chuckle. “But I mean it, sir. I know there are all these expectations and I won’t be able to truly understand what the pressure is like but if you allow it to challenge you, you might even surprise yourself. And then you’ll end up surprising them, too. But do it for you. At the end of the day, they’re just the Board but you’re the Vice President. And you’re you. You’re all you can control.”

There’s a beat of silence as Jungkook takes in everything you’d said. You have this persistence about you that’s reflected in the way you carry yourself and in the way you relate with others, especially towards him despite how he’d treated you not long ago. Regardless of what you said, he thinks you know exactly what he feels when it comes to dealing with pressure. He supposes that working for his family can do that to someone, especially when it’s him.

“Such moving words, Ms. Cho,” he finally says.

“I didn’t mean to give unwanted advice,” you shake your head in disappointment.

“I needed it though,” he surprises you. “Other than Hoseok or even Yoongi, who are both busy themselves, I only have you as a sounding board. And as support. So, uh, thanks.”

He says his gratitude with a soft tone, almost embarrassingly. You can tell it’s something he doesn’t say that often, but you take it, as you think it’s another step towards him trusting you even more. And you need that trust for now; it’s this peaceful and honest dynamic with him that’s making your job bearable.

Lunch continues with Jungkook asking more questions about some of the Board members and you dishing some dirt on some of them as what you’ve heard in the office washrooms, perhaps the only gossip you don’t take with a grain of salt. He’s amused, and you think this is the most expressive you’ve seen him.

You proceed to meet with Manager Lee in the conference room where Jungkook goes through each slide presentation, asking both of you for more information he thinks he needs and about how he’s carrying himself, his tone, his pace, and his engagement. It’s good enough for a first run-through, Manager Lee says, and Jungkook decides to dry-run it again on Thursday.

The rest of your day goes by a little stressfully. There are multiple events that you have to organize and coordinate with other offices, and those are what you work on until you clock out on time.

Jungkook stays behind for only half an hour before deciding he’s had enough of looking through his notes and will return to them tomorrow. He takes the elevator and nods when Yoongi enters.

“Hey,” Jungkook greets. “How are the designs for the Changwon mid-rise?”

“It’s 6:00. I don’t wanna talk about work,” Yoongi whines.

Jungkook knows this. It’s also why he likes to tease his friend about it.

“Fine. We can just stand next to each other awkwardly until we have to get off,” Jungkook says.

“Hmm,” Yoongi hums. “Or, we can talk about how my lunch plans changed because someone asked my lunch partner for a meeting.”

The tension immediately rises and Jungkook hates how affected he is by Yoongi’s teasing.

“Ah, so it was you. Well, she did say it wasn’t as important as what we were meeting about,” Jungkook hits back.

“True. It’s about the Board meeting after all. It’s a pretty big deal.”

Jungkook starts to feel hot all over, as the thought of you and Yoongi conversing about your thwarted lunch plans because of him plays in his head. It’s a mix of frustration and disappointment. While the meeting was in no way confidential, he just hates the idea that it was something you shared with Yoongi. Perhaps it’s just after the fact, considering that Jungkook thinks it was a good lunch. You clearly enjoyed the dish - he could see how you tried to control your reactions to it - and your conversations went by smoothly. You were honest and supportive; he was open and all the more surprised with how well you were able to calm him down. It’s as if someone else was privy to that moment you both shared, even if Yoongi wasn’t there.

“Huh, I thought you were over her,” Jungkook says, the bitterness slicing through. If his friend picks it up, he doesn’t say anything.

“I am. We were just gonna have lunch at this noodle house because she was craving it,” Yoongi clarifies. “I told you, I’m her only friend here. It’s nice to share a meal with someone who cares about you every once in a while, you know? It’s hard being a working adult and we all need a bit of a break and a companion sometimes. It didn’t mean anything more than that.”

Jungkook chooses not to respond and Yoongi could tell why. There’s this look of annoyance painting the younger man’s face, which makes him a lot more transparent than he wishes he was.

But Yoongi can see right through his friend. It’s not something he raises though, but he won’t be surprised if Jungkook dwells on this. He just hopes it isn’t to your detriment again.

The ride home wasn’t as terrible last night, and after your elder neighbor gave you some stew because she cooked too much, you had a satisfying dinner and an even more satisfying slumber.

You feel like the end of the week isn’t too far ahead - although there really isn’t anything exciting for you except for a date with your bed - and you just want to get through all your tasks for the day and get that jjajangmyeon that Yoongi said he’ll get for you today so you can eat it for dinner. You were initially upset at having to pass up on him for yesterday’s lunch, but you’d be the first to admit that sharing that meal with Jungkook was still worthwhile.

Not only was the dish you ordered one of the best things you’ve ever eaten, it was also nice to see Jungkook loosen up a bit after feeling tense all morning because of his presentation. You liked that he’s being open to getting support from you, as it seems that he sees you now as more than just the assistant who’s there to serve him. He seems to appreciate your thoughts and didn’t even act bitterly when you gave him unsolicited advice. You feel even more that your relationship improves daily.

That is, until you enter his penthouse this Wednesday morning with barely a look of acknowledgement from him. Going through your routine, he doesn’t say much; he stays silent the entire ride to the office as well.

When you enter his room to serve his coffee, his furrowed brows have returned and his jaws are clenched as he types away on his desktop.

“Ms. Cho,” he calls out, his voice stern once again.

You turn around to face him, wondering what has happened since you left the office yesterday.

“Yes, Mr. Jeon?”

“I just wanted to raise that while I understand you have personal relationships with other employees, I do not appreciate you divulging the topics of our meetings with them. Even if they’re my friend as well.”

His last sentence gives away who he’s talking about, and the conversation with Yoongi after you canceled your lunch plans with him rings in your head.

It was a harmless statement, you want to say; you didn’t share any more than it being a meeting about his presentation. There was no ill-intent in you telling Yoongi why you couldn’t see him for lunch. But you choose to pass up on reasoning with Jungkook. He builds his wall up even more when you do, and you don’t want things to be that way again, not when they seemed to be going okay already these past few days.

So you nod and concede. “I understand, Mr. Jeon, and I apologize. I won’t do it again.”

Jungkook can’t help but just look at you, internally smacking himself as your face falls further and as you, once again, feel far away because of his own stupidity.

“Is there anything else you need, sir?”

He shakes his head no, and you bow in response, heading out, with the sadness in your eyes as the last thing he sees.

Jungkook is unable to focus on his emails and the conference call he takes part in. The words and thoughts are all jumbled when he practices his presentation, as his gaze constantly flits to your spot just outside where you sit, doing your tasks while looking detached and dejected.

He assumes you didn’t come to work expecting to be called out the way he did with you, which in hindsight, didn’t seem necessary, especially knowing how it’s affecting you right now. Things were going well between both of you after all - he’s being more open and you’re being more comfortable. Information was flowing smoothly, and communication has improved. And he just went ahead and screwed all that up.

Jungkook starts to feel stuffy. He’s been in his office working on things for the Arts Center and practicing most of the day, with you only coming in to bring the lunch he’d asked Mr. Ri to buy and his cups of coffee. You’ve avoided his gaze and haven't said much to him, too.

He decides to take a walk outside. The outdoor space on this floor has nice benches and a small garden that overlooks the Han River. He’s seen the team eat there sometimes, and while the weather may be a little too hot for it, he’d much rather breathe in the air than his humidifier.

But as he takes his time to open the door, he hears a familiar voice from outside.

“Fine, if you won’t take the sandwich, at least take the noodles,” Yoongi says. “You’ve been craving that all weekend.”

“Not anymore,” you huff, seemingly annoyed.

“Hey, did I do something wrong?” Yoongi asks, calm and understanding in tone, traits that Jungkook could only hope to have.

“No… I don’t know,” you sigh. “Just that, whatever I talk to you about or mention, other people don’t need to know them, okay? No matter how harmless they are. Let’s just… not talk about work stuff. Especially in the office. That’s it.”

“Ah, so that’s what this is about.”

“What do you—”

“Mr. Min,” Jungkook calls out, fully opening the door now. “I have design guidelines I need you to go over. I need them by tomorrow morning.”

“Okay, Jungkook,” Yoongi bitterly replies, knowing what’s happened. “Just send them over to me.”

“Ms. Cho will do that right now.”

You nod in acknowledgement of Jungkook’s instruction and remain focused on your desktop. There’s silence in the air and tension that you can’t deal with right now.

“Can I help you with anything else, Mr. Min?”

“Nah. If I do, I’ll check with your boss first if I can ask you for it. Don’t want you getting in trouble because of me.”

You finally look up at him, a tinge of annoyance painting his face, a rarity since Yoongi doesn’t seem to ever be irate about anything.

“And I’ll just take this jjajangmyeon if you don’t want it,” he adds, taking the container that’s on the ledge of your desk with him, before walking out of your area.

You can’t help the pout that forms on your lips. You really love that noodle house’s version and you’ve been craving it for days. It’s where you and Yoongi were both supposed to have lunch yesterday but Jungkook spoiled it, and it wouldn’t have mattered as much, until it became a reason for him to be upset with you again. You’re not exactly sure why, but much as you want to question your boss this time, you don’t have the energy for it. It doesn’t seem worth it, but it also doesn’t change the fact that Yoongi might have said something to Jungkook, and that’s a dynamic you’re still unsure how to read or deal with.

Your gaze shifts to the man himself, who looks less annoyed than he did at the start of the day. You don’t know how his practice has been going, since he hasn’t asked you to run it with him, but you suppose he’s doing alright. He’s been in his room all day doing that and taking calls in between.

Jungkook looks away and heads out. He lets the summer air clear his mind a little before he goes back inside. It’s 6PM by the time he emerges from his room, surprised at seeing your face still buried in piles of papers.

“Ms. Cho, I’ll be heading to Hoseok’s for dinner,” he says, getting your attention. “Anything that needs my signature or approval can wait tomorrow.”

He hopes you’ll read through his words, as he wishes you’d take a rest yourself, like you advise him to do.

“Finance needs your expense reports first thing tomorrow morning, Mr. Jeon,” you say, a little too stoic than he’s used to. “These can be signed tomorrow when you arrive.”

Jungkook just nods, knowing there’s not much he can do if you don’t want to go home yet. But he does leave you with a reminder.

“Ms. Cho,” he says before leaving. He’s met with curious eyes that he tries not to fall into. “Make sure to eat a proper dinner.”

He walks out too quickly, not wanting to see your reaction.

You’re too tired to react, but that just pushes you to finish all your work and head to the pantry for some biscuits. It’s then that you see the paper bag with a note on it.

For ___. Do not touch!

At the back, Yoongi writes, I’m sorry. Here’s a man who knows how to apologize, you think to yourself.

The bowl of jjajangmyeon is inside, as well as a container of gimari. The scent reminds you of how hungry you are, so you heat up the noodles and inhale your dinner as you stand by the table. The empty office and the faint sounds of the air conditioning make you think of how alone you really are - working past your hours on a Wednesday evening, a takeaway meal from a friend you’re pushing away, and a stressful trip back to your empty studio apartment.

You rarely ever feel lonely. You don’t equate being alone with that specific emotion or state. There’s certainty and clarity you get from being on your own. But on certain days, you let yourself crack a little and be vulnerable. On certain days, you let yourself admit that being alone makes you feel lonely, and that at this precise moment, it’s exactly what you feel.

You send Yoongi a message of thanks but don’t extend the conversation after he replies. You know it isn’t his fault, and knowing him, he wouldn’t have deliberately said anything that would’ve put you in this position. It could just be Jungkook misconstruing things, but you’ve been caught off guard and you don’t feel like dealing with anyone right now.

Resuming your work, you do your last review of the expense report and leave it on his desk for his signature in the morning - a struggle considering how messy it is, which is also a rarity, as he always likes to keep things organized. You can tell how stressed he is just by this, and the thought hits you again that it’s the Board meeting in two days, and he needs you to be your best for him; he needs you to be calm and stable for him.

Whatever you’re feeling can be pushed to the side until next week. You’ll talk to Yoongi after all this is over, you tell yourself; it’s more important that you focus on your tasks and just act as professionally and as unbothered as possible.

That proves to be easy early the next morning. You go about preparing Jungkook’s day in his penthouse, going over your coordination and organization of the upcoming events and acting as if what happened yesterday doesn’t bother you, with him not acting out of the ordinary, too. It’s easy when you get to the office as well. He signs off on the expense reports and you go to finance with only minimal clarifications needed.

But when you return to your desk and Jungkook calls you to his room, you feel the tension start to build as you find Yoongi seated on the chair, his face turning sullen at the sight of you.

You nod at him but look away immediately, shifting your gaze towards Jungkook.

“What can I help you with, Mr. Jeon?”

“Deciding on the pieces to be displayed in the event halls of the Arts Center,” he replies. “Artist Lee Jaemin gave us her portfolio for us to choose from. And I’d like you and Yoongi to work on it together before lunch.”

This prompts you to look at Jungkook in surprise. He just told you off about the things you told Yoongi - which, to your defense, wasn’t even anything substantial - and now he’s making you work with the man.

“What about the run through of your presentation, sir?” You ask.

“I’ll do it with Manager Lee. His feedback will be adequate,” Jungkook replies. “I need your options because I’ll be speaking with her tonight about the chosen pieces.”

“I…, uh,” you stutter. “In what way can I be of help, Mr. Jeon? Wouldn’t Mr. Min be enough to make those decisions?”

“You hold the budget, Ms. Cho,” he reminds you. “We need to make sure we follow it. And you and Mr. Min understand my vision more than anyone and I need both of you to bring that to life with those artworks. I’m packed with meetings today so I don’t have time to sort through all of them. I trust that you’ll make the best decisions.”

“Of course we will, Jungkook,” Yoongi says, a bit of bitterness laced in it. “___ and I work well together. It isn’t the first time.”

Jungkook merely nods, and you feel the tension build up even more as both men share hardened looks that you can’t particularly decipher.

“I… I’ll go ahead and prepare the conference room. I shall see you there shortly, Mr. Min.”

You exit the office and breathe a sigh of relief from being out of there. You don’t know what their friendship is like, so you’re unsure if the tension is a sign of something serious or if it’s just a normal thing for them. You choose to brush it off for now and prepare for the meeting, walking to the pantry for a cup of tea before you do.

Back inside, both men remain unmoving, their gazes not faltering away from each other. Yoongi’s look of displeasure is a contrast to Jungkook’s somber, almost guilty face.

“Driving a wedge between us is kind of an asshole move, you know?” Yoongi finally says. “I don’t know what your deal is but this isn’t how you make it up to her. You don’t get to be nice one day then just decide you’ll be jealous and irrational the next without her even knowing what she did.”

“That’s… that’s not what I was trying to do,” Jungkook reasons.

“Then what were you trying to do?” Yoongi scoffs. “I was the one she turned down to have lunch with you. Actually, it was her plan, because she’s been spending so much time alone and she just wanted to hang out with a friend. And not only did you hinder that, you also made her feel like she did something wrong when all she said was that you had to talk about the Board meeting. No one would even bat an eye. Now she can’t even talk to me properly without fearing it’ll hurt your fragile ego.”

The truth is a huge slap on Jungkook’s face, and he feels it sting. He’s seen your comfort around his friend a few times. He also knows that Yoongi has been looking out for you when you fail to take care of yourself. And because of that jealousy and his fragile ego, you might just end up pushing Yoongi away, and isolating you is the last thing Jungkook wants to do.

He tries to say something but his throat dries up, knowing that verbalizing anything would prompt him to face feelings he’s trying so hard to suppress. He hopes Yoongi sees right through him, and the sullen look of the older man says he might.

“You’re not a bad person, Jungkook,” Yoongi says. “I don’t know what about her makes you like this. But if all you’ll do is find fault in everything she does, you’re gonna lose all the progress in your relationship. And you've got to know that’s not fair to her. You know she doesn’t deserve that.”

“She doesn’t.”

It’s the way Jungkook says the words that Yoongi knows his friend regrets what he’d done, perhaps not just yesterday but the other times as well. There’s this emptiness in Jungkook’s eyes that Yoongi hasn’t seen before; he doesn’t want the younger man to drown and lose himself in it.

“I’m… I’m, uh—”

“I know,” Yoongi interjects, knowing how hard it is for Jungkook to verbalize what he feels. “And I forgive you. I suggest you find the words and say them to her. Yeah?”

Jungkook merely nods, knowing that would be difficult for him, not because he won’t mean it but because they mean so much more. With you, it always does.

“I’ll head to meet with her now.”

“Please fix it,” Jungkook almost pleads. “I think she needs you.”

Yoongi gives a look of understanding then heads out to the conference room where he finds you seated already. The lights are dim, allowing him to see Lee Jaemin’s art pieces projected on the wall. You’re focused on your laptop screen, not budging even as he opens the door and sits next to you.

“Are you still mad at me?” Yoongi asks, urging you to look at him.

“No,” you say softly.

“Then why do you act like you still are?” He asks sullenly. “You know I’m sorry.”

“It isn’t your fault though,” you reply, finally turning to him, your own soft eyes mirroring his. “You shouldn’t be apologizing.”

“But I want to. Because I know it matters that you hear the words even if they’re not from the person who needs to be saying them.”

“You know he doesn’t do that,” you sigh, knowing exactly who he means.

“He’ll have to learn how to. Or just stop having a reason to apologize in the first place.”

“We’ll see about that,” you shrug. “But I’m sorry, too. I just didn’t know how to act yesterday and earlier. I just didn’t want any more drama.”

“I know, and it’s okay. It’s not your fault either. I had to call him out for it.”

“You did?”

“Yeah. I called him an asshole.”

“You–what?”

“Well, sort of. He had to hear it, and it seemed like he knew it, too. That's why he wanted me to fix things. Not that anything was broken, as far as I know.”

“Is that why he made me meet with you?”

“Yes, about something that he and I could easily do over coffee or a meal,” Yoongi chuckles. “But like I told you before - he tries. It’s usually just a misstep or something more complicated than actually saying sorry.”

“It’s hard for him to say, I guess. Maybe he just has his own ways of saying them.”

“It’s still not an excuse to be an asshole though.”

“At least you’re there to call him out for it,” you chuckle.

Yoongi laughs along, knowing it’s a role in Jungkook’s life that he wouldn’t mind taking. And just like that, the tension between the two of you is gone. He throws in a few jokes in there that take seconds for you to process, and it’s his crinkled smile that makes you smile and feel comfortable as well. It’s the icebreaker you need before getting to work, and it takes you both until lunchtime to decide on which of Lee Jaemin’s pieces you think would fit well in the event halls that Jungkook wants to put them in.

It’s a different experience for you, as you’ve never made decisions like this before. You wouldn’t say you’re artistic in any sense, but Yoongi’s approval of your choices and agreement with your reasoning make you feel that you aren’t as design-blind as you think. And while Jungkook has the final say - you’re not even sure if your choices would make the final cut - it’s still satisfying to see the empty spaces come to life on your screen with artworks that you chose with Yoongi, while still being within budget.

You both walk back to your work area where you see Manager Lee, and he tells you that Jungkook seems ready for tomorrow’s Board meeting. You enter his office with Yoongi, presenting what you’ve come up with - the greens and pinks common in her pieces give the room so much life, and the imperfections of her subjects leave viewers with much to admire. From the tropics to intimacy, the bright yet muted palette of the images elicits both joy and loneliness.

Jungkook goes through them while you and Yoongi look on.

“I’ll check each piece again later,” Jungkook says. “But these look good; I’d choose these myself.”

“___ chose most of them,” Yoongi says, earning him a glare from you.

“Is that so, Ms. Cho?” Jungkook asks.

“Mr. Min helped. And those pieces just spoke to me, I guess,” you answer shyly. “They’re beautiful pieces, Mr. Jeon. But I don’t have any arts or design background so please feel free to change them.”

“We’ll see,” he says, looking at you with a kind of affirmation that you’re not used to.

You nod in response and check the time. He’s got another meeting in an hour and he should be having lunch soon.

“What would you like to eat, Mr. Jeon? I can get it for you,” you say.

“No need. I asked Mr. Ri to get me something. I figured you might have lunch plans,” Jungkook responds, glancing at you and then Yoongi.

You look at the man next to you, who motions towards the door and you get what he means immediately.

“Okay, Mr. Jeon. I’ll go take my break now.”

You walk out with Yoongi who asks you what you’re craving, and sweet and sour pork comes to mind. He chuckles at your excited face, and you grab your purse and head out, turning back once to catch Jungkook watching you walk away.

Maybe this is his apology. In whatever form it is, you’ll take it. You find sometimes that the silence in place of words means a lot more, in ways that feel more.

The rest of your afternoon again feels like a blur, as you meet with the support team about the upcoming events and make sure everyone is on the same page. You spend an hour on the phone with Lucas about some Singapore and Malaysia-based Korean artists who are flying for the project launch in a few weeks while Jungkook goes from one virtual meeting to another.

It’s 5:30 before you know it, and you’re working on your spreadsheets when Jungkook walks out of his office, saying that he’s meeting with Lee Jaemin later in the evening and that he’ll just update you about the final pieces.

You acknowledge him and wish him goodbye, but he stops on the way, at the entrance towards the hallway, making sure he remains present while unable to see you.

“Ms. Cho,” he calls out, surprising you.

“Yes, Mr. Jeon?”

“About what I said yesterday, I apologize,” he says, almost stuttering. “Especially if it caused a rift between you and Yoongi. I didn’t intend that.”

You’re too shocked to say anything, much more process the words that you can’t believe he’s saying. But he really is apologizing; he really is trying.

“It… it’s okay, Mr. Jeon. I understand.”

There’s a beat of silence, and you’re left to observe him from this angle - jaws clenched, head bowed down.

He deeply exhales. “I’ll go now. No need to stay late; you can go home when you’re able.”

“Okay, sir. Have a good night.”

He finally leaves, and the silence engulfs you. Sometimes, words in any form truly matter. You could only hope that Jungkook knows that.

The suit that you choose for Jungkook for today’s big day is a dark gray textured piece. He looks immaculate as he stands before you, and you try your best to even your breathing as you fix his tie like you do every morning. There’s something about him today that makes him more handsome than usual - a quality that you’ve found yourself admitting and accepting more easily as the days go by. He exudes a certain kind of confidence and power with his attire and his parted hair. There’s determination in his eyes as he stands tall, ready to face the day.

And you’re there, admiring the way he carries himself just inches away.

You fix the collar of his suit and make sure that all creases are flattened. You meet his eyes and the confidence melts away a little.

“Do I look respectable enough?” He asks, a little less serious than you expected. It’s when you see the nervousness in his eyes that you know how important today is for him.

“Yes,” you assure him. “You also look ready to impress the Board members with your presentation and get them on your side. I’m sure your vision about the Arts Center will make them believers.”

“Ah, well, that’s asking for too much, I guess,” he laughs dryly. “But I was on the call with Lee Jaemin last night and she was so excited for the launch. It would get her to visit Seoul often, she said, and that made me realize that artists like her and the consumers, the ordinary people, the ones who the Center is for - they’re the ones who matter. It’s their interest and appreciation that I value, not the Board’s.”

“That’s a good realization to come to, then, Mr. Jeon,” you smile, suddenly feeling like you’re seeing a different man - someone who cares about meaning and the power of art. “I suppose if that’s your mindset coming into the meeting, then you’ll definitely do well.”

“I think if there’s at least one other person who ends up believing in the value of the Center, that would be enough for me,” he says, holding your gaze for a while before turning away. “But uh, today is more than that. You and I both know they’re there to assess my capabilities - social and otherwise - and definitely point out what I lack, or probably tell me I’m not cut out for this job or that I’m terrible or something. I mean, you would know, right?”

His eyes, focused downward, slowly shift to you. You know what he means, and given that he isn’t the type to admit to things, this is probably the only other time that he comes close to acknowledging how he was to you.

“Mr. Jeon, if you’re indeed terrible, I would have quit after a week. Or… well, after the second day,” you admit.

“Why didn’t you?”

“Well, I couldn’t afford to,” you chuckle to ease the tension. “But also I… I saw the change. And that’s always a good thing. Lacking something is normal. We all have things we need to work on but that doesn’t make us terrible people. That just means we need a bit of understanding from others. And that also means we just have to keep trying to be better.”

There’s a sullenness in Jungkook’s eyes but there’s acceptance and understanding, too. Perhaps it’s the most sincere you’ve seen him look, and of all the days that he needs assurance about how he’s been, today is when he needs it the most. Sure, there are still things about him that you wish he’d work on. He’s still not the best person in the world. He could still be a bit impulsive with you and can sometimes be irrational in your eyes and definitely needs work on dealing with his emotions. But he’s trying. That always counts for something.

“We do,” he nods.

“Your father believes in you. Hoseok believes in you, so does Yoongi.” Holding his gaze, you add, “so do I. So trust in yourself. If you can’t do it for you, you can do it for us.”

“Is giving pep talks part of the job description?”

“It should,” you giggle. “But I’ve given several of them to Mr. Jung. I’ve learned that during stressful moments or just when we’re a little overwhelmed, it makes a difference to hear the things we already know from someone else.”

“I’m a little stubborn, but I hope you continue doing that for me. For as long as you think I deserve it.”

Jungkook doesn’t know where the honesty and vulnerability are coming from. But he’s found that with you, it’s natural - difficult because they’re things he rarely is around other people, but natural. He doesn’t want to question it anymore for fear of learning what else is instinctive for him when it comes to you. But with the way his insides melt with how you sweetly and assuringly smile at him, he realizes that his defenses against you are not that strong to begin with.

“Well, we don’t have time to pass by a cafe for a nice breakfast so I asked Mr. Ri to get some instead,” you announce, changing the subject now.

You walk towards the dining room where he follows, and you present a spread of pastries, walnut tarts, and sausage rolls alongside a large cup of coffee.

“I don’t really eat before a big meeting,” he says, frowning a little. “I’m sure Lucas told you that.”

“He did, but I’m a little stubborn, too,” you counter. “Breakfast is important before a big meeting, Mr. Jeon. It’ll help you focus, even if that’s just one tart or half a danish or a quarter of a roll. Eating will improve your energy levels and lift your mood. It might help ease your nerves somehow.”

“Fine, but I’ll just have half a roll.”

“No worries. You can always eat some more throughout the day,” you say.

Jungkook ends up finishing the entire roll and a walnut tart, while you finish a danish and settle for tea. You pack up what’s left, and he instructs you to give the rest to the team.

The car ride is quiet, save for the gentle sound of his pencil gliding through the pages of his leather notebook. He seems to be channeling his energy in a way that allows him to be calm, you think, and that’s a good thing.

You arrive at the building and Jungkook goes straight to his office while you excuse yourself to go to the conference room to help the other assistants prepare it. You don’t see Jungkook until an hour later when he enters, and you lead him to his seat then serve his coffee afterwards. It gets busy quickly as the Board members arrive, and you help in ushering them to their seats and catering to their needs. Before you know it, the assistants are heading out, leaving them and the executives to discuss confidential matters that none of you are required to know.

It’s another two hours before the presentations start, but Jungkook won’t go until after lunch. So you settle in your desk and work on various things, unable to fully focus because your mind constantly goes to him.

This is normal, you convince yourself; you had the same nervous energy for Hoseok the first time he did this. But then again, it was your first time, too. Perhaps it’s knowing how much it means to Jungkook and his own worries that makes you feel uneasy.

You understand the feeling of wanting to prove oneself, and not always being able to fully express that desire to others. He’s been honest with you recently, and sometimes it can feel quite isolating when no one is there to share the burden, which is why you’ve been trying to cheer him up and encourage him, in hopes that he’ll feel supported, that whatever happens today, he knows he has you on his side.

You proceed to the function hall for the catered lunch where you meet Jungkook. He shares the table with Hoseok and Bitna, as well as Ji-woo and her assistant, and you engage in conversation with them like old times.

Jungkook watches you speak to his cousins casually but respectfully, and he doesn’t miss the inside jokes and personal details that you all share. You still look a little reserved, but there’s this comfort in the way you express yourself around people who trust and care for and respect you.

He’s always known Hoseok and Ji-woo to be great with the employees, and a part of Jungkook envies that they’re able to just share parts of themselves with others, that they’re able to expend their time and energy being around them, something that’s always been difficult for him. He likes his privacy, likes his own space; he revels in the silence to battle the noise in his head. He’s protective of his thoughts and his feelings; he’s particular with who uses his time and energy on; he keeps his distance because it’s always easier - to not be involved, to not be invested, to not be known at all rather than be judged because of what people know.

He also thinks it’s quite isolating. Outside of his family - whom he keeps his distance from as well - the only person who knows him enough is Lucas, but it’s as shallow as just knowing his preferences and his technical opinion on things, not his dreams or fears or everyday thoughts and emotions.

Jungkook isn’t someone that people go to for advice or for encouraging words; he’s not someone that people ask about how he’s doing; he’s not a person that others seek for comfort or warmth. He’s just a man who does his work, that people serve, that people want approval from for their own gains. He’s not someone they’d go through lengths for. He just takes up space that others orbit around but he’s not the center of their world; he isn’t anybody’s.

“Is everything okay, Mr. Jeon?” You disrupt his thoughts. “Is there anything you want?”

“Chocolate milk,” he says too quickly. “Uh, only if there is.”

“Hot?”

“Yes.”

You call the server and ask if they have any, but the man says they don’t, so you decide to head to one of the stalls at the food hall downstairs.

“You don’t have to,” Jungkook says, pulling your wrist in reflex as you stand up.

You’re caught off guard and so is he, and he immediately lets go and apologizes for it. The guilt in his eyes is similar to the one you saw at the restaurant when you’d admitted that he made you feel uncomfortable, and something about it makes you feel moved.

“I mean, uh, it’s okay. It’s not urgent,” he adds, looking away.

“If it’ll help, then I should get it for you, Mr. Jeon,” you insist. “It won’t take long. I’ll be back before lunch ends.”

You don’t wait for a response and head out, leaving Jungkook with curious looks from his cousins.

“So, I see you’ve warmed up to her already,” Ji-woo hums, smiling.

“You could say that,” Jungkook shrugs, acting nonchalant.

“Well, it’s about time you did,” Ji-woo shakes her head. “She works incredibly hard and she’s very reliable.” At the younger man’s nod in agreement, she adds, “you just had to give her a chance. There’s a reason why uncle and Hoseok wanted her around for you.”

“I guess,” Jungkook hums. “She’s… she’s a good person. I don’t really know if I deserve that but she is to me. She’s required to be, I suppose.”

“Or she sees you as a human being who needs a bit of warmth and joy in his life,” Ji-woo suggests. “Kindness goes a long way, you know? She’s said before that there are people who have extended it to her and maybe she’s just doing that, too.”

“Or maybe she sees something in you,” Hoseok says now.

“Like what?” Jungkook scoffs, knowing himself that after he’s treated you, there’s no way you’d see something in him, whatever that is.

“Like an emptiness, or yearning. Something she feels, too,” Hoseok responds. “Maybe she’s unknowingly making you feel something that she wants to feel herself, you know? I had A-yeong, my sister, my parents, my friends... Seeing her now with you, she didn’t pay attention to my every need the way she’s doing now, and that’s not a criticism of her. Perhaps she just knew that I had other people to do that.”

“And I’m the lonely, single, friendless man that she’s stuck with,” Jungkook laughs dryly, although he’s not offended. Deep down, he knows it’s true.

“Sort of,” Hoseok chuckles. “But what I really mean is that she knows what it’s like to not have someone to look after her like that. You may think it’s just her job but I think it’s her not wanting you to feel like there’s no one there for you. Maybe if you see it that way, you wouldn’t think you don’t deserve it. Then you can accept it and maybe you can do the same.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Jungkook counters, given that keeping his distance is exactly what he plans to do because any closer would just lead him down a path that he won’t be able to escape from.

“It’s not that deep,” Ji-woo says. “I think what my brother is saying is that it’s okay to be friends, you know? Or just allow her to be nice to you and then return the favor. It’s a much better dynamic. I mean, I’m sure he’s told you but things are just gonna be more challenging down the road, once you’re past the adjusting phase. You’ll need her like you’ve never needed anyone before. I do mean that professionally, but that also requires a kind of relationship where you know and trust and respect each other. It goes both ways.”

Jungkook takes in his cousins’ words, knowing that they speak from experience, and they’ve been doing this longer than he has. He already knows he needs you. That itself terrifies him. He also knows he has to rely on you, and maybe that entails allowing you to care for him in ways that no one - not since Chaerin, at least - has ever done before. That means letting you come close, allowing you to know him, letting you be there for him. Doing the same for you isn’t a question of whether he wants to or not - he’ll probably be denying it to his grave, but it’s about whether he can remain within the boundaries he set for himself, knowing already how you affect him without even doing much.

The thought gives Jungkook a headache, but it’s not something he can give attention to right now. He’s got a presentation to do in less than an hour. He’ll be scrutinized and questioned and probably judged and then he realizes it again - he needs you through all that. He already knows you’ll be encouraging and supportive; you’ve shown that in the past week especially, and he’s appreciated and hated every single moment of it.

The hurried footsteps signal that you’re back, and you take your seat next to him.

You’re panting as you place the cup on the table. “Here you go, Mr. Jeon. I’m not sure if it’s as milky as you want it but the really good cafe downstairs said it should be good. Oh and uh, wrap your hands around it,” you instruct, earning you a curious look. “Your hands are very cold.”

Jungkook does as you say, feeling the warmth of the drink through his skin, even more when he takes a sip and finds that it tastes just as he wanted.

“This is good. Thank you,” he utters, not wanting to meet your eyes.

You exhale a sigh of relief. You know how he has particular tastes and you just went with a hot chocolate even if he specifically said he wanted chocolate milk. There’s a brand he likes from Lucas’ list and you didn’t have time to actually get it or even store the office pantry with it - which you realize now you should do, and you make a mental note of doing an inventory so you could request for more of the things he likes later on.

“You’re welcome,” you reply. “I… I hope it helps for the presentation. Or the nerves. Or just in general.”

“It has,” he confirms, humming with every sip.

Not long after, everyone is instructed to head back to the conference room so the meeting can resume. You take your seat with the other assistants at the side after you’ve ensured that the presentation is ready while Jungkook heads to the front. You watch him go through his notes a final time, and when he sets them aside and looks up, his eyes find yours.

They’re still tainted with worry, you can tell even from several feet away. So you give him a comforting smile, knowing it’s what he needs. You gently nod and give him a double thumbs up as if to say that he can do it, and he nods back, as if to say that he’ll do his best.

And that’s exactly what he does.

The presentation goes for a quarter of an hour, and while he does give a good rundown of the achievements of the past three months, it’s his pitch of the Arts Center that really makes him shine. The visuals are good to begin with. He did those blueprints himself and the designs give life to his vision, but he explains every aspect of the project with just enough detail to enable the audience to imagine how it looks and what it makes them feel. He took into consideration earlier worries about profits and brand reputation, as well as anticipated questions and points of attack, so he goes ahead and addresses them to the point that he can’t be scrutinized for anything that’s lacking. He keeps in mind the qualities of each Board member, so he makes eye contact if he needs to and acknowledges side comments and builds on them.

He’s definitely added more - and improved - since that first runthrough you did with him, and he looks very confident and very respectable. You can tell that he values not just profits but art itself - its creation, its appreciation, and the various ways it can be experienced. As someone who yearns for that kind of passion for something, seeing him like this is quite moving.

It doesn’t help that he looks as good as he does standing up there, and it’s a thought you let yourself have before dispelling it quickly.

He gets approving nods from most of the Board members. The rest still look a bit doubtful, but you suppose they wouldn’t directly criticize Jungkook and his plans in front of everyone after a presentation like that. You also take a peak at CEO Jeon who’s unable to hide how proud he is of his son. Hoseok and Ji-woo exchange smiles as well. But Jungkook remains focused, ready to answer any questions or comments from the Board.

Mr. Mun is the first to commend him and doesn’t ask much. Mr. Im surprisingly praises Jungkook after admitting his reservations, and Mr. Saito, as you expected, asks clarificatory questions that just builds on what was earlier presented. Jungkook’s readiness and creativity are highlighted as well, and you can tell that the older man is extremely excited for this project.

The hour is up before you know it, with only minimal questions and a few comments from the attendees. Ji-woo and Hoseok raise points to help with marketing and earning profit, and you take note of all those for discussion and debriefing next week.

Jungkook thanks everyone before returning to his seat, and you see the breath he lets out after, seemingly glad that that’s at least over. You catch his attention again, and you can’t help your smile. He acknowledges you with a nod, and he turns his focus towards Hoseok as the next presenter. The afternoon goes by like this, with Ji-woo going last and CEO Jeon closing out the meeting.

There’s some time before the fellowship dinner, which is spent with side conversations and check-ins. Mr. Saito goes to Jungkook right away and you see the latter’s face light up a little, although you don’t miss the sniffing and the throat clearing that he does. You think that his cold hands earlier weren’t due to his nervousness; perhaps the last month has finally caught up to him because you truly believe that this man does not rest.

You head out to return to your desk, knowing you’ve got several things to do before the dinner that assistants are invited to. You fly through your notes from earlier and some administrative tasks before heading back to the event hall where you find Jungkook talking to Mrs. Seo and Mr. Ong this time, two people who’d most likely be critical of him so you’re glad that he’s at least forging some relations, if their animated way of speaking is any indication.

You see him excuse himself to head to the washroom, and you take this time to order a cup of ginseng tea for him. It arrives just as he returns to his seat, and when it registers why you’d ordered it, he nods and mumbles his thanks.

“If I may, perhaps you shouldn’t stay long, Mr. Jeon,” you suggest. “It’s been a tiring week and you need to rest.”

Jungkook hates being told what to do, but he’s also never had someone tell him to rest because he needs it, much less even know that he’s not feeling alright.

“I need to engage with the Board,” he reasons. “I’m sure that’s what father would like. I can rest during the weekend.”

“Okay, sir,” you sigh, knowing he’s also right. Perhaps he’s accepted that this is a critical part of his new role as Vice President. “Just let me know if there’s anything more that I can help you with.”

“I will.”

You sit at the table where the other assistants are, engaging in hushed conversations as you talk about the Board members and how tired you all are. It’s nice being around them, as you all share the experience of stress and isolation, of knowing too much sometimes, of security and stagnancy. They know what you’re going through, partially at least - unlike you, they have people to go home to and proper hobbies that excite them. They have loved ones close by and things they look forward to during the weekends. So while they do make you feel understood, you also can’t help but be a bit jealous.

Your thoughts are suspended when Bitna offers to take you home. It’s well past 9 and you’re not keen on staying longer to drink with the rest of the big bosses here. You glance at Jungkook who has a wine in hand, clearly trying his best to keep up with the conversations he’s a part of. He looks incredibly tired - much more than usual - and you feel bad that this isn’t something you can help him with.

You take Bitna’s offer and you both head to your respective bosses to bid your goodbyes. Jungkook nods and mentions his meeting with the artist last night that he says he’ll discuss with you on Monday. There’s more you want to say, but you worry he’ll think you’re nagging about his health - which, you remind yourself, is also part of your job - and you don’t want to end the week on a sour note.

Jungkook watches you leave the event hall and he immediately feels your absence. Even when you spent much of your time apart, he could feel you there, partly because of the ginseng tea that you ordered for him twice at your insistence and partly because the knowledge that you’re around is enough. And now you aren’t, and he suddenly can’t stand any more of the socializing he has to do.

But he powers through it for another hour. When he bids his father goodbye, the older man commends him for his presentation earlier and the way he handled himself throughout the fellowship dinner. It’s assuring, but he knows there’s so much more work to be done so he doesn’t revel in it any longer than a few seconds.

The drive home is quiet. His soft groans as he massages his temples are the only sounds in the car. When he arrives at his empty penthouse, he grabs a bottle of whiskey from the counter and sits on the couch - a glass in hand, necktie and buttons undone, feet on the coffee table, and head rolled back as he reminds himself that he survived the day, that he did a good job, and that he changed some of the Board members’ minds about him.

And much as he tries to keep away the image of you, he’s unable to - there you were in the room, on his side, cheering him on. He didn’t miss the satisfied smile on your face once he finished his presentation, nor your look of worry after the ginseng tea was placed on the table.

You’re just good at that - making him feel like someone looks out for him, that someone else minds that he succeeds, that someone cares that he’s not well and that he should rest.

The smile on his face fades once he’s reminded that you’re supposed to do all that, and that he isn’t anyone special, nor should he be. It’s the thought that keeps him behind the lines - you’re unattainable in so many ways, yet he’s also glad that you are. It’s easier to be mindful of his place like that; it’s easier to accept that you’re you and he’s him, and it’s easier to do his job when he knows you’re just doing yours.

At least, that’s what he hopes.

But when he gets a call from reception the next morning about a package that you dropped off, all that wishful thinking seems pointless. And as he stares at the bowl of chicken noodle soup in front of him, all his thoughts from the night before come crashing down.

Why is everything so hard when it comes to you?

Series Masterlist

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Series Taglist: @xhazmania @ash07128 @rinkud @junniesoleilkth @junecat18 @peachytokki @baechugff @coralmusicblaze @jalexad @pamzn @hoseoksluv89 @familiarlikemymirror3 @kookies-n-spice @hyuneyeon @thisartemisnevermisses @jk97bam @nadzzzblog @xyarinx @megnugget98 @shameless-army @jkslvsnella @lvr2seok @nayashalouiseburrows

#jungkook fic #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x oc #jungkook angst #jungkook fanfiction #bts jungkook #jungkook series #jeon jungkook #boss jungkook

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writings-of-a-demigod · 2 months

Text

“What are you thinking so hard about?” Hondo chuckled a little.

“Oh you know just some facts.” You shrugged.

You were standing in the middle of the hallway just spacing out when Hondo approached you.

“Well come on lay it on me I wanna hear it” he told you smiling.

You two started walking together when you started.

“Did you know that alligators don’t age biologically? They don’t die from old age, they die from starvation or a disease” you informed him.

He stopped walking and thought about it for a minute “I didn’t know that”

You turned to look at him “Yeah I know and now you do” You smiled and kept walking.

___________________________________________________________

“Hey Y/n”

Tan walked in and looked at the screen looking for new info’s about the case they’re working on.

“Oh hey Tan”

You looked up from the iPad in your hands to glance at him then back to the screen.

“Got anything new?”

“Oh yeah did you know that Koalas spend 99% of their life eating and sleeping and the other 1 % they spend searching for a mate, where they wander around aimlessly until they find one. If they don’t find one, eventually they just give up and go back to sleep.”

Tan looked at you blinking with a confused expression on his face, he pointed at the screen.

“I meant about the case”

“Oh that, yeah check this out.”

___________________________________________________________

“I read something interesting lately.” Deacon started.

You were making a sandwich in the kitchen when he walked in and starting have a conversation with you, nothing out of the ordinary just normal break time.

“Me too” you were getting the ingredients ready for your sandwich.

“You tell me first” he gave you a soft smile.

“Okay so listen to this did you know that the smell of gasoline can irritate bees? And it may excite them to sting so imagine what would happen if you put a tube with bees to someone’s open mouth and a little smell of gasoline” you looked at him with evil smirk on your face.

“You truly scare me sometimes you know that?” That’s all he said to you before walking out of there.

*gif not mine*

A/n: I love writing for SWAT so much and I enjoyed this one 😂 as you can tell. I always tell my friends the most terrifying random-ass facts so I thought this would be fun.

#writings-of-a-demigod #swat #swat imagines #hondo #hondo imagines #hondo x reader #deacon kay #deacon imagines #deacon kay x reader #deacon x reader #victor tan #victor tan imagines #tan x reader

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kentosbabes · 1 year

Text

Moving into your new apartment with Nanami

Nanami who asked you if you wanted to move in together as you had began spending alot of time at his place rather than your own. From then you realized you needed a bigger space so he went online and spent months looking for the perfect place.

Nanami who dragged you to every viewing and took photos of every inch of the apartments. He also brought a notepad to write down the pros and cons. After long months of looking you found the perfect place that overlooked the city.

Nanami who finalized the deal within a week and began getting ready to move. Due to his job as CEO of a publishing company money was no issue and shushed your attempts to at least pay half the rent. 'My love all my money is yours so technically you're paying as well' he says as you sit in his lap as he sips his morning coffee. 'You don't need to worry your pretty head about any of that'.

Nanami who started packing way before the moving date. He's already buying boxes and putting things in them before you've even begun going through your belongings.

Nanami who sits on your bed as you go through your draws and closet deciding what to get rid of and what to keep. Moving gave you the excuse to go through your clothes finally. 'what about this dress Kento? do you like it' you say holding the dress to your body. He looks at it intently before saying 'its short. I like it'

Nanami who helps pack up your apartment and put everything neatly in boxes. you always thought you were good with cleaning but Nanami was on a different level, neatly folding your clothes up at an unimaginable speed.

Nanami who on moving day drives you and your belonging to the apartment. You were stood at the doorway of your old place for ages, not out of sadness but excitement for the change and happiness as the memories of everything comes flooding in.

Nanami who fumbles with the key putting it into the door while his other hand wraps around your waist. 'oh Kento its beautiful isnt it' you say walking in and looking around the apartment. he hums in response pulling you into a soft kiss by your waist.

Nanami who takes a week off to help unpack everything. He never takes days off even when he's sick but he wanted to spend time with you and help with the decorating. He would be up till 1am unpacking boxes of plates and cutlery as you dance around with a glass of wine in your hand.

Nanami who really couldn't care less what color the living room wall should be but still acts interested while you blabber on. 'hmm what about this shade? it would go match with the sofa we ordered but it's also bland so may not?' you say holding a sample color to the wall. Nanami comes up behind you putting his chin on your neck 'I think this color' he says picking up a sample and placing it on the wall. 'Oh, Kento that's the shade! It's perfect' you say in excitement kissing his cheek.

Nanami who lays in bed with you curled up to his chest scrolling on his iPad through furniture. 'this would match with the rug we ordered' he says pointing to the lounge chair on the screen 'hmm its cute but it doesnt match the vibe' you say looking up at him. 'vibe? and what is the vibe?' he asks. 'well since were practically in a penthouse in thinking something timeless and luxurious, see like this' you say now pointing to a different lounge chair a cream color.

Nanami who makes sure everything is perfect to your liking. He's hiring the best decorating team and builders to make sure the place is perfect. he also make sure to pay a little extra to ensure the work doesnt take too long and you can enjoy peace and quiet soon.

Nanami who signs in relief as the last builder leaves leaving you alone in your now complete new apartment. 'ugh I love it so much' you say looking up at him. his hands find your cheeks as he puts his lips to yours. 'I love you so much' he says picking you up and taking you to your room.

Nanami who finds himself saying 'God im going to fuck a baby into you' as he thrusts into you. The now larger apartment makes him think about the future and having a family with you. 'is that what you want' he asks looking into you eyes as his fingers toy with your clit.

Nanami who groans as you nod your head 'yes, Kento f-fuck' His thrusts quicken as you reach your high with him not far behind and finishing in you. his body crashes down on you and you mumble 'Maybe we should talk about me coming off my birth control' his head lifting up and his eyes filled with excitement 'Really?' he asks

Nanami who now cant wait to come home. he always finds you in the kitchen dancing to music as you cook dinner. He places down his bag and you rush towards him wrapping your arms around his neck showering him with kisses.

masterlist

#nanami headcanons #kentosbabes #kento nanami #nanami smut #nanami kento #nanami kento x reader #jjk nanami #jjk headcanons #jjk smut #jujutsu nanami #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen

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petalsthefish · 7 months

Text

Genius

Summary:

After Lily breaks her iPhone, she finds herself at the Genius Bar on Valentines Day, and an old flame is there to help her in all things technology and romance.

read on A03

Marlene McKitten: babes you're missing out on blackberry margs!!

Lily Evans: I’m sorry! It was the only time I could schedule a time for my phone to get fixed!

Marlene McKitten: you just hate me, its okay, you can say it

Lily Evans: you’re a drama queen, Marlene McKinnon

Marlene McKitten: you love me anyways…find me a hot date at the apple store so I can get discounts!!

Lily Evans: if I find a hot guy he’s mine for the night

Marlene McKitten: further proof that you hate me

Lily Evans: I’m here. … Pray this doesn’t take five hours and I can come meet you for drinks.

Marlene McKitten: how hard will it be to replace a screen? … I bet I could do it myself with youtube and a little superglue

Lily did not reply back to her friend, she didn’t have the heart to tell Marlene that superglue and youtube weren’t the answer for everything. Even if superglue had proven effective at keeping Lily’s favorite mug together after it broke in the dishwasher.

Lily just couldn’t believe she was spending her free time at the Apple Store because she'd somehow cracked her phone screen. In all her years of owning a phone, of course it would be the most expensive phone she’d ever had that broke. Even her flimsy flip phone had been more sturdy than her iphone.

“Hi, are you here for an appointment?” A scrawny kid about her age asked, holding the iPad too close to his face as he approached her near the front doors.

Lily nodded quickly. “Yeah, Lily Evans, for a screen repair.”

“Gotcha.” The kid's nametag read ‘Peter,’ and he barely looked up at her as he typed away on his screen. “I checked you in; just go wait at the Genius Bar.”

“Thanks.”

Lily maneuvered around the cramped store, sighing all the while as she made her way to the Genius Bar. It was rather depressing to be alone on Valentine's Day, but it was almost extra disappointing that she’d had to skip lunch with her girlfriends to come here. Lily couldn’t believe she was missing out on the tacos at Casa Grande, a tradition that went all the way back to Uni. She nervously picked at the crack on her screen, most annoyed that she’d somehow forgotten to add the screen protector when she got her new case two months ago. Another sigh escaped her lips before she finally took a look at her surroundings.

There were three boys at the counter, each of them so different from the other. The first, on Lily’s left, was a bloke with a leather jacket, emitting a touch of emo metal head from his persona. The one on the right definitely looked like he belonged at the Genius Bar in the Apple Store, thanks to his perfectly pressed sweater vest and nicely combed hair. The man leaning against the table opposite Lily, typing into his iPad, was a sporty-looking bloke wearing slacks with a rumpled button-down shirt.

She thought to herself, Actually, no, that sporty bloke looks really familiar… Oh.

It hit her like a freight train.

She couldn’t remember his name for the life of her, but he’d somehow gotten hotter in the year since they graduated from college. It’d been almost that much time since they’d danced at a party, stumbled up the stairs to his bedroom, and he’d fucked her on his bed. Not even a quick go. No, she had woken up in his bed to find his arms around her, her clothes all over the room, and her phone dead from going all night without a charger.

He’d been such a gentleman when he woke up. He had practically stumbled over his words when he realized she was there, in his bed, naked with him. They had both been drunk, so even he admitted it had probably been a bad idea. They’d parted ways an hour later, Lily promising that she’d be okay to walk back to her dorm, and he had let her go so she assumed he really hadn’t wanted anything more than a once go in the sheets.

More than once, she'd thought about this bloke, wondering what happened to him.

His black hair was in a mess of waves around his head, and he didn't look up from his iPad as she stared in shock. She didn’t know what she’d say to him if they did make eye contact. The last thing she’d said to him was ‘thanks for the sex’ which somehow grew more and more embarrassing the longer she sat here and recalled it. She kept picturing his naked body in that bed in the morning. What would she say if he looked up right now and she was there remembering the contours of his body?

Hi, I almost didn’t recognize you with your clothes on.

She’d save that gem for later.

Probably never.

Lily felt disappointed as he walked away without looking up, disappearing through a door that likely led to the back. Her heart slowed in her chest, just slightly, but she felt like her throat was drier than the desert. She cleared it twice, earning a look from the guy in the sweater-vest, but he just went back to his task at hand.

Since the other two men at the Genius Bar were preoccupied, she took that to mean she was going to have to wait for help. She checked her Tumblr, finding nothing of consequence, just some idiots in her ask box telling her to eat dirt and choke on it. A usual occurrence on her blog thanks to internet trolls with nothing better to do than hate strong women like Taylor Swift and Captain Marvel. Lily was fully convinced people just liked to find something to complain about. She tried really hard not to complain or take anything a bunch of internet ghosts said to heart. She scrolled through her favorite Taylor Swift blog and saw there had been a new song mashup released. She wished she had brought her headphones so she could at least listen to the music while she waited.

London Boy crossed with This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things would be absolutely disastrous and she was here for it. She reblogged it for later, then exited out of the app, settling for people watching instead.

Around her, couples were looking over new computers, AirPods, and various other electronics. All the girls wore really pretty dresses, and all the partners kept one firm arm around each other's waists. Lily’s dress was pretty too, and she played with the edges of the corset cut as she stared at the door through which the fit bloke had disappeared.

Had he spotted her and run? Did he remember her? Did he forget her? She wasn’t sure what would hurt her more, if he walked away because he saw her and remembered her, or if he walked away because he forgot about her.

Lily wasn’t a bragger, but she knew for a fact he had fun with her a year ago. She remembered enough of that night to know that he’d been really, really enjoying it. Not many men would get between her legs for her, and very few actually made her scream. No, he’d been one of two, and he’d been the best of all.

Lily crossed her legs, trying to ignore the heat gathering on her face (and in other places) as she recounted that night. Sadly, her body wasn’t listening to her imploring thoughts. She felt like a damn animal in heat, the way her entire body was strung up, waiting for his reappearance.

Beside her, the emo guy helping the old Lady change her voicemail sent her a sidelong glance randomly, and Lily felt a blush raise on her cheeks when his eyes grazed up and down her body as if he were checking her out. She didn’t drop his gaze, and instead offered him a smile. His gray eyes snapped back to the old lady and spoke to her in a smooth tone that didn’t seem the least bit flustered.

She looked down at her candy-colored nails, the pink already chipping from scrubbing her hands too much at work. The phone on the table in front of her buzzed with a text from her girls' chat. Marlene sent a photo of a plate of tacos in the shape of a heart. Lily smiled and opened her phone, hearting the photo. As she did so, the grandmother finished her session and walked away, leaving the emo kid free. Lily looked up from her phone quickly, expecting him to turn to her, but instead, he had his back turned to her as he talked into his headset.

“No, I won’t stall for you—Prongs! Don’t argue with me.” He sounded stressed, as if whoever was on the other end was ruining his life. “Then get out here, you idiot.”

Whoever was on the other end was clearly addressing the whole store through that headset, as Lily witnessed the sweater vest-wearing, scrawny boy, and the long-haired brunette nearby all turning to send looks in Emo’s direction with raised brows. Lily couldn’t help but feel as if they were all looking at her too, despite her not being privy to the conversation happening.

“Hi,” someone touched Lily’s shoulder from behind, making her turn in surprise.

A baby-faced woman with bubblegum-pink hair smiled kindly. “Have you been checked in?”

“Oh,” Lily blinked owlishly, feeling stupid for thinking everyone was looking at her. “Uhm, yes, Lily Evans? Screen repair?”

“Our screen repair guy is stuck on the phone with a customer in the back,” she said cheerily, “but he should be out soon.”

“Oh, there’s a guy?” Lily said in surprise. “I thought screen replacements were kinda a universal genius bar thing.”

“Oh, we can all do it,” The girl’s name tag told Lily her name was Tonks, “but someone called dibs already.”

“Dibs?” Lily didn’t miss that Emo kid was cackling as he typed something into his iPad.

“Did I say dibs?” Tonks put a finger on her lips. “I meant he was assigned to you by the boss.”

“Who’s the boss?”

“He is.”

Suddenly, the door behind them slammed open, and a body stumbled out quite dramatically. Lily perked up at the sight of the familiar form. Sporty boy was back! His black hair was even more wild around his head, as if he’d been running his fingers through it non-stop since he’d disappeared. His glasses were skewed too, but it only made him so much more attractive, to see how flustered he was.

Tonks peered around Lily’s shoulder, her pink hair falling into her eyes. “Smooth entrance, Potter.”

“Thanks for holding down the fort, Nymphadora,” Potter said. “I can take her from here.”

Lily’s eyes traced his tall form, realizing it had been a long time since she’d been able to admire it. When her gaze returned to his face, her eyes met brown orbs that looked delighted to know she’d been openly checking him out. Lily’s mouth opened, but no sound came out. She brushed nervously at her red curls, biting her lip as James waltzed over to her at the bar, leaning against it so he was only a foot or so away from her.

“Hi,” his voice was smooth, like an ASMR streamer. “I’m James Potter.”

“Hi,” she almost choked on her own spit. “Hi.”

James’ fingers trailed along the edge of the bar, casual yet deliberate, as he said, “I heard you rang for a genius?”

Lily’s mouth quivered when she heard Tonks sigh loudly. The emo guy slammed his palm against his head, as if James had embarrassed them all. Sweater vest physically gagged. James just kept smiling at her though, as if he could tell she was attracted to him regardless of his cheesy pickup lines. And it was true, she was.

“I heard you are the only one in this store who can help me,” Lily flirted, watching his eyes light up at the challenge. “I had no idea you were so important.”

“Me either, to be honest.” He placed his chin on his hand, supported by his elbow against the bar. “What was your name again?”

Lily tucked her hair behind her ear. “Lily Evans? We met about a year ago at a party.”

His eyes seemed to sparkle as he replied smoothly, “Oh, I remember how we met, it was just your name that escaped me last year.”

The blush was uncontrollable now as she reached out a hand for him to shake. “It’s nice to see you again.”

“You have no idea how nice it is to see you again.” James’ grin grew wider. “And on Valentine's Day, no less.”

"I know how to make an entrance." She managed weakly.

James' eyes were molten gold mixed with green flecks, "you sure do, especially in that dress."

“Get a room,” the guy in the sweater vest muttered.

“How about yours, Remus?” James shot back, a bite in his tone.

Remus pretended to be interested in his customer's macbook in response. When Lily looked back at James, she felt a punch to the gut as she saw nothing but pure lust in his eyes. She could practically pinpoint where his mind had dropped, thanks to his eyes staring at her breasts, which were practically popping out of the corset cut top of her dress.

“Like what you see?” She asked boldly.

"Yes." He cleared his throat, and her eyes dropped to his mouth when he licked his lip and then curled the edges up to smile confidently.

Hazel eyes.

His eyes were hazel, and she’d forgotten that, so now all her memories were being replayed with coy hazel eyes that undressed her without even trying. He wasn't even trying to hide it, especially not right now.

“Well, what can I help you with today?” James asked, breaking her concentration on his eyes.

Dinner. She thought desperately. A quick go in the back of the storage room. Instead she offered, “I think I cracked my phone screen.”

James looked down at the phone in question. Lily picked it up, popping off the blue protective case in one fluid motion, before handing it to him. She fiddled with the case as he turned the phone over in his hands once.

“And you’re sure it’s not just the screen protector?”

Lily shook her head no, “I tried to pull it off, twice, but couldn't get it, so I’m pretty sure I forgot to put the protection screen thing on when I got my new case.”

“Oh Lily,” James clucked his tongue, “always use protection.”

Oh, that was the wrong thing to say.

Her brain immediately fluttered into the pit of her stomach with ideas of all the things they could do with protection. God, she hadn’t been so turned on since the last time he’d gotten her into bed with him…only this time it was daylight and she hadn’t had a single thing to drink.

Pure thoughts, Lily Evans. She thought. He’s just a guy. A hot, cool, incredibly charming guy. Fuck it, I’m screwed.

James casually picked at her phone screen, seemingly ignoring the desire flickering in her eyes as he remarked, “The glass shouldn’t stick up like that; I think it’s just a screen protector.”

“I really don’t think–”

Watching in mortification, Lily winced as he used his thumbnail to pry at the glass. Suddenly, a sound of unsticking reached her ears as he removed a screen case from her phone's actual glass. Redness flooded her face for an entirely different reason. She’d been a total, utter, helpless idiot for bringing her phone here.

It hadn’t been broken at all.

“Oh my god,” she whispered, “Oh, no, no, no, no!! I am such an idiot.”

“No!” He quickly reassured her, “You’re not an idiot!”

Lily felt herself spiraling with embarrassment, realizing she just hadn’t pulled hard enough to separate the sticky tape from the glass. “I swear—I tried so hard—I thought it was the screen.”

His thumb brushed the side of her wrist in comfort, but instead of soothing her, it sent a wave of shame coursing through her stomach. “It’s an honest mistake; it was securely fastened.”

“Yeah,” she squeaked, noticing he had leaned closer over the counter, now mere inches from her face.

“Seriously,” he seemed so amused, and that only humiliated her further, “it’s fine, I won't even charge you.”

She didn’t know if she’d ever felt more stupid, and in front of the hottest guy she knew, too. “I’m really sorry for wasting your time.” He searched her face as if seeking something within it. Lily withdrew her hand from his shyly and then grabbed her phone. “I’ll just go, thank you, um, bye.”

Trying to escape the awkward situation, she hurried out, acutely aware of the stares from those around them who had witnessed the embarrassing exchange. She slipped her unprotected phone under the strap of her dress and brushed her hair behind her ears as she rushed to her car in the parking lot.

“Dumb, stupid, idiot.” she muttered over and over to herself, repeating the whole scene in her head. “How did you graduate college with a science degree, but you can’t even pull a fucking phone condom off.”

She reached her car in record time, the lingering sense of humiliation mingling with a cocktail of other emotions churning in her gut. Her plan now was simple: she would rendezvous with her friends at the taco place and immerse herself in a flight of margaritas. Maybe if she got intoxicated enough, she could erase this entire fiasco from her memory. As she finished flinging her bag onto the console of the passenger seat, she heard footsteps approaching from behind.

Turning abruptly, she was startled to find James from the Genius Bar standing there, a friendly smile gracing his features. “Hey, Lily.”

“Hi,” she managed, her voice high-pitched from her embarrassment.

HIs eyes dropped to the phone, precariously held between her pale skin and tiny spaghetti thick dress strap. “Why do girls stuff everything right there?”

Lily looked down at her phone and then back up to him, feigning tucking her hands into the folds of her dress skirt, “most girls clothes don’t have pockets–so we improvise.”

“Interesting.” He then asked promptly, “Did you know that I worked here?”

“No,” she swore, as the wind made her skirts gather around her legs, “I swear, I had no idea.”

A light flickered in his eyes, “that’s a shame.”

“Why a shame?”

“I was hoping you made up that entire thing about the glass cracking just to talk to me.” He grinned. “But you genuinely thought it was broken, didn’t you?”

“You were hoping I was lying?” Lily blinked owlishly at him, “really?”

He lifted a lunchbox in his hand, smiling awkwardly. “I only have an hour for lunch; why don’t we catch up, and we can talk about what I was hoping for.”

“What?” Lily asked, not comprehending anything because her hormones were cheering excitedly.

“Sorry,” he tucked the lunchbox behind his back again, “did you not want to eat with me? I think I may have gotten mixed signals from you back in the store…”

“Eat with you?” she repeated. “ With you?”

“I know it’s been a while,” he was rambling, “I know we aren’t even like–friends–but you showed up and I–I nearly had a heart attack seeing you again. A heart attack in the good way–not a bad way. You are definitely good. All good. So good.”

Lily still had one hand on her car door, her chest rising and falling as she struggled to find the words. “I–I’m an idiot who can’t tell the difference between a screen cover and a phone screen…and you want to have lunch with me?”

James shrugged, “despite working at the genius bar–” Lily offered him a snort of amusement, “--I prefer idiots, don’t you?”

“You're not an idiot,” Lily said, motioning to all of him, “you’re–you’re that .”

“Eloquent,” his smile was so wide, his eyes crinkled at the edges. “But I’m 100% just as much an idiot as you.”

“How so?”

“I was an idiot for ever letting you go without a number to text you at.”

She felt her stomach erupt with pleasant butterflies. “What?”

James looked down at her body, then back up at her eyes with a coy wink. “Truthfully, I've been wondering where you disappeared to for a year now and would really like to catch up. I’d also really love your number, for your working phone, just in case you ever need a genius to fix it again. Is that okay?”

Lily felt like she might be dreaming. She pinched her arm. It hurt. Thank god. “This isn’t a joke, right?”

“No,” James walked forward, almost flush with her person now. “I do love a good joke, though.”

“Really?” He was so close, she could count the tiny freckles dotting his tan nose.

James' hand brushed her arm, sending shivers racing up it. “What’s the best book to read while eating breakfast?”

Lily felt a smile replacing her confused expression as she leaned up on her tiptoes, allowing his free hand to cup her chin. “What book?”

“Much Ado About Muffin.”

"You're right, you are an idiot." She rolled her eyes, but her tone was flirtatious, "a really, really cute idiot."

"They'll hire just about anyone to work the Genius Bar these days."

Lily didn’t wait anymore; she grabbed a fistful of his shirt and pulled him down, letting her lips muffle his laughter.

She could still feel his smile through the kiss though, even when he opened his mouth to taste her with an eager fever she had forgotten about. She kissed him back harder, especially when she heard his lunch bag fall to the ground near their feet, and both his hands grabbed hold of her long hair to keep her firmly attached. He tasted like mint gum, like he'd just been chewing it before coming to find her. Like he'd planned for this exact scenario to happen.

She almost swooned at the thought.

Finally, what felt like only a second later, he broke off the kiss. When her eyes opened, she saw nothing but him, and that only made her smile grow wider. His hands remained in her hair, but he tugged them forward to cup her cheeks, bringing the red strands with him.

“So,” he said somewhat breathlessly, “lunch date?”

"What'd you have in mind?"

"Calling out of work, taking you home, and ordering pizza for a long movie we won't watch."

Lily stepped forward, about to kiss him again for suggesting it, but then she felt her chunky heel step on something, and a resounding crack filled the air. Lily thought it might be the lunch bag he’d dropped, and for just a second she hoped, but whatever was under her foot was smaller. She looked down, face white, and all she saw were broken bits of glass under her heel. Her heart plummeted from its high as she stared down at her broken phone.

“I broke my phone,” she realized, lifting her foot to show a screen in tiny bits and pieces. “Oh my god, I really broke it this time.”

James untangled himself from her and leaned down, picking it up carefully, and they watched as it disintegrated into multiple pieces in his hand. His eyes lifted from the phone to her. She stared back at him. Lily fell against her car, pressing her hands into her hair as she processed her disbelief. James' mouth was partially open, like she'd just stunned him to silence.

“I can’t believe this!” she half laugh, half cried, while wiping her eyes. "I can't fucking believe this!"

Then, James doubled over with laughter, weeping from the irony of it all. Lily crossed one leg over the other as she laughed too, her head rolling back against her car. Passerby in the parking lot shared attempts like they were lunatics for laughing so hard. It only made them laugh harder.

"What am I going to do?" Lily cried, her side in stitches. "Oh god, I haven't even paid that phone off yet!"

"I can't believe you broke it!" James wiped the tears from his eyes, "oh my god, your luck!"

"Oh fuck," Lily pressed a hand to her forehead, "I don't know why I'm laughing, this is actually so bad, I need my phone for work."

James walked forward to plant a firm kiss on her mouth before reminding her, “Don’t worry, you know a genius who can fix it.”

~~~

+44 7123 456789: Lily??? Are you Alive??? Your bedroom doors been shut since yesterday?? have you even been home???

Lily Evans: holy shit I am so sorry, who is this? I have a new phone and forgot to switch my contacts over from the cloud

+44 7123 456789: ....Marlene....HOW BROKEN WAS YOUR PHONE??? It was a scratch the last time I saw it??

Lily Evans: funny story...

Marlene McKitten: where are you?!

Lily Evans: do you remember that one time I got super drunk at a party and woke up in a hot guys bed?

Marlene McKitten: ya...why?

Lily Evans: I'm currently in his bed right now

Marlene McKitten: ??? get home right now or so help me god I'm tracking your phone and coming to you

Lily Evans: save yourself a drive and meet us at the Genius Bar, he's taking me over there to fix my old computer I thought was broken.

Marlene McKitten: ?????????????

#jily #lily evans #james potter #jily fanfiction #jily fic #sleepover saturday #JPLE

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egophiliac · 1 year

Note

Hello! Sorry to bother but do you have any digital art tips? I’m quite new to it and any tips, tricks or advice would be helpful! Your coloring style is very beautiful and I love it a lot!

thank you! 💚💚💚 sorry this is a bit late, hopefully there's still something helpful in it!

(also, it got pretty long, sorry!)

I think the biggest thing is to just take things slow -- digital art feels different than drawing traditionally, and it's SUPER easy to get overwhelmed by the billions of cool features that the digital world offers. (I say, as someone who spends a lot of time downloading cool brushes and textures...and then never using them ever.) there is a ton of really cool stuff you can do digitally, but because there's so much, I think it's really important to take time to figure out what is and isn't working for you. spend some time doodling without any intent to do a finished piece, figure out how you like to hold (or not hold) your tablet, what keyboard shortcuts you end up using a lot (and therefore might want to map to your pen/tablet buttons for quicker use)...that kind of thing!

everyone's workflow and preferred program and style are different, so it's hard to give hard-and-fast general advice. but the things that I think of as the essentials for learning digital art programs, and what I think of as a good order to focus on learning them in (although YMMV, especially depending on what kind of art you're doing):

brush customization (e.g. flow, opacity, softness)

layers and layer masks

selections and transformations (e.g. scale, rotate, flip horizontal/vertical, skew) (skew is underrated and I will die on that hill)

blending modes (e.g. multiply, screen)

adjustments/adjustment layers (e.g. hue/saturation, curves)

and I think most stuff after that is gravy! often very good gravy though! but yeah, as overall advice I recommend just taking things one little bit at a time, spending some time just drawing and messing around with each feature and what you can do with it. whether or not you end up incorporating any of it into your workflow, it's always good to try things out and just see how they feel! :D

and just so there is at least a little more concrete helpfulness in here, here's a few more specific things that I think are super important to keep in mind!

use! your! tablet/pen buttons! I mentioned this earlier, but they are extremely useful for keyboard shortcuts that you use often! most programs will also let you create new shortcuts for other things -- personally, I use the magic wand tool to fill in big color blocks a lot, so I made shortcuts for 'expand selection' and 'fill' and then mapped them to my tablet buttons.

flop your work horizontally often! when you're working on something, you get used to the way it looks, so seeing it mirrored is a quick way to see it with fresh eyes! in my experience, it often feels like this:

(a common thing is to find that everything is sort of 'leaning' too much one way, which is where skew really comes in handy!) (seriously, I love skew, it is my savior)

if you're working with color, keep a hue/saturation adjustment layer (or a layer filled with black or white and set to Color) on top and toggle it on occasionally to check your values! a lot of people who know a lot more about color than me (and are better at putting it into words) have written about why values are so important, so all I'll say is that the rule of thumb is that your image should still be readable in greyscale:

there are some exceptions and grey areas (do ho ho), but it's a good general rule to keep in mind! (some programs also have a colorblind mode, so you can check to see how your work will look to someone with colorblindness!)

and finally, here's some digital art programs I recommend, if you're still looking for a good one!

free: krita, FireAlpaca

paid: ClipStudio, Procreate (iOS/iPad only)

#art #...sort of #horizontally flipped mal isn't my favorite drawing i've ever done of him #but it's up there #anyway i do personally use photoshop #but i absolutely do not recommend it when there are better and free-er art programs out there #it is the equivalent of texting with a giant 90s-block phone that has been jury-rigged to somehow install whatsapp #because i don't NEED a new phone i KNOW how to use this one it's FINE #(oh god i've become my dad)#someday i will have to actually switch to clipstudio and learn new keyboard shortcuts :(

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ms-demeanor · 9 months

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Hey! I appreciate your perspective on computer-based things. I think I need to get a laptop and would love your opinion on decent brands. If you don't have an opinion or want to answer please disregard the q.

Context: I'm often on the move and really want something small, light, and that will last a long time. I'm bad about buying new things or taking things to be fixed so ideally it's not something that dies quickly or needs frequent repairs. For a while I used an iPad for this but I need more of a keyboard than tablets have and the shelf life of an iPad is shorter than it should be for the cost. Mine is 7 years old and only works while plugged in... I liked my Macbook Pro I got for college but it's almost 15 years old and given I haven't needed a new one since I don't think spending all that on a Mac makes sense either. I use a gaming PC mostly but I'm going to need to travel a lot more in the upcoming year. I'm ok to spend up a bit since I want it to last.

I think you're going to have to adjust your expectations about the average functional lifespan of electronics. Seven years is a lot to get out of any tablet and fifteen years is way way way above average for a computer.

At work we estimate that the functional lifespan of a laptop will be around five years and the functional life of a desktop will be around seven years; we include upgrades in that lifespan, like adding RAM and storage.

It is not *unusual* to get more than five years out of a laptop or seven years out of a desktop, but if you are a heavy user of anything other than a browser and a word processor, that's about the time when you'll find that the computer feels slow enough to be frustrating. This isn't a hard limit, and it's not something that everyone experiences because people use computers differently, but if you're an artist and you use a drawing program that program will start to feel slow after a while because as updates and patches and drivers have been tweaked for newer devices they've slowly left your device in the dust.

This isn't planned obsolescence, by the way. Computer manufacturers try to "future proof" their devices to a certain extent, but you just can't anticipate certain kinds of changes. Maybe your laptop was manufactured before there were consumer SSDs available so its operating system doesn't take the advantages and limitations of SSDs into account. Maybe your desktop was built for DDR3 RAM and we're now on DDR5 and people aren't writing programs to the standard of the old technology, they're taking advantage of the standards of the new technology.

Since you were able to use your devices comfortably for such a long time, it sounds like you're not a very heavy user and don't need to worry too much about beefing up your specs. However it does sound like you want to keep your computer and use it as long as possible while paying a reasonable price for it (which is good! I think we should all try to extend the lives of our electronic devices as much as possible!).

I actually think you sound like a good match for a Framework laptop.

Framework is a company that makes laptops that are a lot more modular than what's on the market these days. They're mean to be easy to open up for upgrades and sturdy for heavy use. Most of the parts of the laptop are easily replaceable - including the screen - so you can use them for a long time and easily make upgrades that will help the computer feel fresher.

They're a bit more expensive than comparable PCs but much easier to repair if you aren't comfortable opening up your own computer (framework is intentionally built to be easy for people who are non-technical to work on their computers), and they are a LOT less expensive than comparable macs.

I still think you're probably looking at around 7 years of regular use out of a Framework and it won't *break* at that point, it will just. Probably be a bit slow and frustrating. You might not be able to get parts for it after a certain point. You eventually won't be able to upgrade the OS. But that's true of all computers.

I've still got my 2005 macbook. It still turns on, I can still use garage band on it. But it doesn't connect to the internet and uses such an old USB standard that it is extremely slow to transfer data on or off of and it cries and freezes if i try to use photoshop. It's not broken, it's just no longer useful as a daily computer.

What I'm defining as functional here is "Is able to run multiple programs (including at least one browser with 50+ tabs open and two office suites) at the same time for 8-10 hours a day without crashing, freezing, or losing data and restarting is not a major inconvenience."

In those terms, it does sound like you're probably in need of an upgrade (I can't imagine that your current machine is particularly quick) and I think that a framework laptop would suit your needs well.

If you're looking for something somewhat less expensive, you can generally find a decent thinkbook with a 12th or 13th gen i5 processor, 16GB RAM, and a 500GB SSD for around $700-ish, which is the low end of what I think you're going to pay for a decent laptop. I'm reccing lenovo here because I personally like them and have found them to be very easy to crack open for repairs and upgrades. Stick to the thinkbook over the thinkpad because that's the business line and is a bit sturdier and they are designed to be easier to upgrade over time.

Actually, here's a thinkbook with a 12th gen i5, 40GB RAM, and a 1tb SSD for under $700. That's a shockingly good price for that laptop; the reseller OEMGenuine is one I've purchased from many times before for work and I've found them to be reliable, though the reason those specs are so good is because they've added aftermarket parts, so your RAM and SSD won't be under warranty from Lenovo.

For Framework you're looking at at least $1000, but it's easy to plug and play with upgrades so you can start out with lower specs (except processor, don't cheap out on the processor) and upgrade later. The framework is a bit smaller and easier to travel with, but I have a laptop quite similar to the lenovo and it's not a huge pain to move around - it's very light but the 15" screen might be bigger than you're looking for.

If you're willing to spend a little bit more and you're very uninterested in doing your own upgrades and would prefer the most computer you can get for your money right out of the gate, this is a 12th gen i7 thinkpad with 40GB RAM and a 2TB SSD for $1150. (I've not ordered from this reseller before, so maybe check over their terms if you're considering purchasing from them.)

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fariesoiree · 10 months

Text

minors mdni

hobie is always down to help you study.

it starts on a wednesday night. you’re both lazing around in your apartment. candles are the main source of light and the smell of lemon zest wafts through the walls. tyler the creator’s dogtooth is lulling through your kuromi speaker.

it’s hobie’s choice. you both knew you’d be too focused to fiddle around with the music. if given a choice, you will turn into a two hour doom scrolling session of funny videos and cute cats anyway.

you’re lying on your stomach, neck deep in your pink ipad. hobie lays behind your with your feet on his chest. he absentmindedly runs his fingers along your calves. occasionally, his fingers dig into the muscle and provide you with temporary relief.

he catches up on his usual forums, criticizing the government and the rich. it’s bit ironic, he knows, to be so deeply in love with you but hate where you come from. his morals go out the window with you, though. especially when you turn and look at him with a sad brown eyes and a grimace. all he wants to do is remove hardship from you life, forever.

unfortunately, he has to be realistic and there is only so much he can do. “what?” his hands rub over the balls of your feet, covered in frilly white socks.

you’re always complaining you’re cold, despite never actually getting up to change the temperature and wearing the thinnest layers of clothes. today is no different. you’re wearing a flowy white tank top with matching shorts. he tells you it reminds him of a paper bag. you tell him to shut up.

“i don’t wanna do this anymore.” your cheek drops to your bed amid your complaining. your brain is fried with all the unnecessary reading you’re being forced to do. what you thought was supposed to be a quick little study session turned into hours of you curating a study guide for this unit.

hobie stopped by a while ago, bringing takeout with him. he originally came when you both thought you’d be finished soon but seeing how you weren’t, he stays by your side to keep you company.

“then don’t.” he shrugs. he’s not being helpful, he’s aware, but he never went to college and he doesn’t plan on it. like he will ever spend years at a government institution and follow their rules just to get a piece of paper. “ ‘s all a scam, anyway. meant to keep the average person down and pump ‘em right out to capitalism.” he looks up from his screen, his apologetic smile all mocking and sarcastic. “not that you would know anythin’ ‘bout that. basically invented it yourself.”

you narrow your gaze and huff when you turn away. “you’re so annoying.” if he didn’t have a hold of your leg, you definitely would have kicked him in his jaw. “not everyone got bit by a radioactive spider and is in a band.” you grumble into the palm of your hand.

at this, hobie is scoffing. he sits up, pushing your legs onto his lap. you can feel his finger between your shoulders and can only guess he’s pointing at you. “be serious, love. when’s the last time you spent your own money?”

“that’s not what we’re talking about!” you whine, both to evade his question and display the distress currently ruining your day. “i’m tired of this. just wanna download it into my brain.”

the screen of your ipad goes dim, as if on purpose. it’s reminding you of the control is has on you when you tap it to pull it out of sleep mode. you much rather would like to chuck it across the room but then you’d have to buy a new one. not only does that entail spending money you didn’t want to spend but also an earful from your boyfriend about how wasteful you are. about how you’re fueling the fucked up ethics surrounding consumers and producers.

you didn’t want to experience either.

“okay, okay.” hobie’s pointing finger is eventually replaced by his hands. they engulf your shoulders but press and roll them till you’re no longer as tense. “tell me how i can help.” he peers over your side to get insight on your progress. all he sees in a bunch of words, having no concept of what you’re studying. he’s willing to help, though, how ever you’ll have him.

you shake your head with a drawn out sigh. at this point, you need a break. maybe it would be better to come back with a fresh mind and clean slate. “you can’t. i’m just not gonna finish ever.” you snap the apple pencil back in its case and flip the cover over the top.

you officially give up, pushing the tablet away from you. your body flops on top of your mattress and your eyes flutter closed. what else are you to do than take a nap and hope your study guide studies itself. “jus’ won’t do it.”

hobie rolls you over by your waist. you didn’t protest and he likes that. it’s so easy for you to snowball and begin to complain about everything. he lets you, knowing you’re just expressing your frustrations but he can’t deny that he still likes to prevent it when he can.

“you been buggin’ me all week about how you need to pass this test. you’re not going to not do it.”

you feel the mattress dip from his weight when he leans to pluck your ipad up from above you. you gripe and grouse loud enough for him to hear you only to be met with it plopped down right in your chest.

you just barely open one of your eye to see if he’s serious about his opposing stance. when you see him looking right back at you, you know he is and that only further annoys you. “but i’m not doing it, not right now. i can’t.”

he pulls you until you’re seated, despite your purposefully limp body making it difficult. “you don’t really have a choice, sweets.” if you don’t do it now when he’s here to hold you accountable, you won’t do it at all. “i’ll help you. come on.”

“you can’t.” your exasperated by his insistence. he’s always like this, always forcing you to do things you don’t want to. in hindsight, you’re grateful because it’s usually something you really should do. “you don’t even know what i’m talking about.”

“i don’t have to know what you’re talking about to help you. you’re one studying, not me.”

you have no idea how much has passed since that conversation. truthfully, you have no idea if time is passing at all.

how your study session escalated like this, you have no idea. hobie and his infinite horniness is really the reason behind this, as he is with almost everything.

“read the next line.” he speaks from above you. he’s still seated, however you’re lying on your stomach again. you’re back, focusing the best you can due to the conditions of this time being. your bonnet is hanging halfway off your head from all the sliding you’ve done.

hobie is gripping one of your ankles, the other free to move behind his back. unlike other times you take too long to follow directions, he states his piece again. “i know you heard me, babydoll.”

it originally started out pretty enjoyable. you’d read out your little facts, tell him what it meant, show him you understand. in return, he’d praise you with soft words and grind the baby blue vibrator against your clit.

the first few times, you found the waves of your orgasms to be pleasant. it served as the perfect incentive to motivate you to study. however, now is an entirely different story. instead if a reward, it operates as a punishment. you’ve been pushed far past the point of overstimulation and lost count of the number of times hobie had you creaming all over yourself.

your lips tremble and you do your best to ignore the soft buzzing between your legs. much to your dismay, it’s still on and on the lowest setting. how long is stays like that is up to you. “in – infants first experience trust versus mistrust.” your hand flies behind you when he presses just right. the usually enjoyable feeling is underlined with pain and has you wanting to snap your legs close.

“move it before i do,” hobie says after giving you opportune time to correct your decision. he doesn’t like being mean with you, would much rather spoil you and never see you lift a finger. sometimes he does have to put his foot down, though he never really revels in it.

you hesitate, blubbering about how rude and unhelpful he is. you’re only lifting one finger at a time off his wrist. he wouldn’t care if you weren’t simultaneously attempting to pull away from him.

“gonna tell you again one more time, angel.”

your hand is gone before he finishes his sentence.

you don’t see hobie smile your obedience but you hear it, hear how lighthearted his voice is when he speaks again. “so trust and whatever. what about it?”

he’s still so gentle with you even like this. he only holds tight enough to keep you still and sometimes he takes pity on you. like this time when he turns the vibrator off. just enough to let you think.

you can’t think, though. you’re blank and growing more restless the longer nothing forms in your head. it’s such a simple topic until there’s three different people who theorize the meaning behind it. “something with nature and nurture, i think.”

“something? you think?”

hobie can’t believe what he’s hearing. you knew your fate when you said it, yet you continue to speak it. to your defense, you weren’t all that confident in your response. if it didn’t align with what you said before, he’d catch it and somehow you would end up back in this situation again. either blamed for not expanding earlier or for being incorrect now.

“it’s not a direct response,” you immediately defend yourself. you look over your shoulder, hoping to plead and response. “psychology is like a big written response test. everyone’s brain isn’t the same.”

he cocks his head, tenderly stroking your calf. by now, he’s used to your excuses and isn’t interested in negotiating the answers with you. “yeah? is your test written response?”

you suck your teeth and face the decorative pictures on the wall in front of you. what does he want you to do? break into the classroom and take the answer sheet? “you’re so mean to me. you hate me.”

hobie only rolls his eyes at your dramatics. while he did expect it at some point, your constant protests still has the same effect on him. “you’re such a crybaby. not gonna be sayin’ that when you pass.”

he turns the vibrator back on and reinstates his grip on your leg. he doesn’t have to, not with the way you collapse. your face is in your hands, muffling your garbles. if it was any other day, he’d feel betrayed. how dare you keep him from hearing what sounds he’s causing. today though, he’s more lenient.

you’re trembling when he circles it between your folds. you reach, seizing a hold of your cinnamroll build-a-bear. you feel a bit of guilt for your poor bear having to witness such lewd acts but the feel disappears the moment he turns it on the highest setting.

it’s so sudden, both the settings change and how quickly a weak watery stream comes out of your pulsating hole. you shriek through the rhythmic clenching until you’re whimpering.

your pussy is aching, tightening around nothing and begging to be filled. your clit may be sensitive but your need is not yet satisfied. “oh my god ‘bie. can you please just fuck me. i’ll study and be quiet and do whatever you want. please.”

hobie only laughs. it’s genuine though, soft and sweet when he pats your lower back. “can’t baby. that’s not what we’re doing here. if you do well next week, maybe.”

you feel like crying. how much longer did he intend on doing this? how much longer are you going to be tortured? is this how you die? you know your complaints would be ineffective in receiving the results you want so you sniff, sucking it up. you’ll just agree for now and get what you want later.

surely enough, on next tuesday you’re excited to show him your high marks. thanks to his unconventional methods, you make a ninety-four. and just as he’s suggested, you’re rewarded with an amazing night full of no sleep.

#ִ ࣪✮🕷✮⋆˙#astv hobie #hobie brown #hobie smut #hobie x black!reader #hobie x reader #hobie x y/n #x black fem reader #x black reader #x reader

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captain-n-crunchies · 5 months

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$50

Rich Bf/ Itachi x Black/Chubby Reader

' 60% OFF SALE AT FASHION NOVA SUMMER DEALS FOR THE HOES!"

Summer deals for the hoes??? Now Fashion Nova play too much I thought as I scrolled down the site on my iPad, hitting the flashing sign on my screen. Endless amounts of outside and summer outfits littered my screen...but that's no sale! $30 for a 2-piece top and bottom!? Yes, it gave brunch or mimosas at the beach but still, it only 10% off but, I tap my size and the color and continued adding endless amount of clothes, shoes, and earrings into my cart.

' Tachi gon whoop my ass after this one..' I thought when reviewing my entre cart, Itachi loves it when I spoil myself or put a dent in his wallet but, lately he's told me to spend a little less, I understand it thought I filled up my walk in closet to the max and my shoes is practically covering the wall; when I walk into the closet you'll think it's a mall just full of outfits from the summer time to winter chic to spring flings etc. I delete a few items the cart only depleting by a smidge, I look down at the price...a whopping $640.87 but, I got free shipping! I open my cashapp my balance is $800 buttt I could ask tachi to give me just a bit more, right? I bite my nails and think should I order it with my money and be an independent baddie on a budget? Or be a baddie with a walking wallet on her with no budget? As I think I hear the door open.

" Baby? Com'er for a second"

' Tachi's home!' I thought as I put on my Ugg slippers and went quickly down the stairs, Itachi now sitting on the couch with his glass of whiskey and his computer; I tip-toe behind him and cover his eyes with a childish giggle.

" Guess Who?" I say with a smile, he chuckles and hums for a second.

" Hm? Is it my wonderful reader?"

" No, it your wonderful, gorgeous, beautiful, breath taking, sexy, darling reader"

He just chuckled and kissed my hand as I come around to sit beside him, my plush thighs connecting with his when he lifts my legs onto his thig and rubs my calf. I lean closer a give him a peck whispering a welcome home from his long day at work. He kisses me back and he tells me about work, his eyes now calmer and less tense. We talk about what we have planned for the week and other things that came into our brains.

" Darling, have you did what I asked of you for today?"

Shit! I forgot, Itachi told me to try to clean out one side of my closet so I can have a tidy area for the rest of the year so going bit by bit I did see some shoes I didn't like but, I didn't donate them or threw them away NO! I put them in the attic because I couldn't let them go to waste! What if pink Chanel come back in style and I can just bring the whole collection back? Through my inner turmoil Itachi watches me with a black expression as I awkwardly try to explain.

" Well, I did clean out some but, I got tired, so I took a nap, then I made me a little snack for the hour because I only ate a bagel and-"

" So, you didn't clean out much?"

" It's progress...You just have to lean into it! See if you look at it from my point of view it very hard for a girl to get rid of -"

" So, you didn't clean, nor have you gotten rid of anything dear?"

I just sighed and nodded, putting my head down and looking away. Itachi sighs and lifts my chin up and kisses my lips.

" Let's see how much you've done then we can go on from there hm?"

" But! You've been at work all day, Tachi! It wouldn't be fair to let you help my mess."

" Nonsense dear, up now let's see what 'progress' you've made"

He airs quotes progress and picks me up from the couch onto my feet and walks to our bedroom while I slowly walk behind him, he's too calm...like Itachi would never hurt me but, he doesn't do the not listening thing. When me and Tachi first started this, he set clear rules that disrespect and disobedience would come with spanking, a short allowance, and no sex for week or 2 months depending on what I did, usually I'm a peach! only go punished a few times when I got a bit too bold with him. As I finally gotten into our room, he's standing there with a disappoint look.

" Only five pairs of shoes are in a box and two tops darling? This looks like 30 minutes of work-"

" Actually, an hour! It would hard because I love the leather heels but, they kind of hurt my feet but it's my only pair of leather heels I mean, I do have dark denim thigh highs but, they aren't giving the way those heels did, so I did a process and-"

" Darling."

I stopped talking and looked at his stern face, he sits on the bed and pats his thigh, and takes the band from his long hair down and loosens his tie.

" How many you think hm?"

" How many what?"

" You know what baby don't act dumb, unless you are as dumb as I thought.

My legs tighten as I try to explain how I should get away from this one punishment ranging from pleas to bargains but, Tachi just shakes his head and pats his thigh again.

" Not going to say it again baby, you've got 10 seconds before it 30 spankings and no cumming till the entire closet is clean."

He started counting and I quickly bend over his lap.

" Please me gentle Tachi" I said small and meek

" No promises my angel"

*SMACK!*

*After her ass got tore up*

" Your going to listen to me more hm?"

" Yes sir.."

" Good, now tomorrow I'm off I'm going to help you clean out some of it okay baby?"

I just nod snuggling into him, he tore my ass up and then gon try to be all loving after? Thats real bipolar but, whatever; I grab my phone from the table and see the sale is almost over.

" Tachi?"

" Hm?"

" Can I borrow $50?"

He looks down at me with one eye and I show him the sale, he rolls his eyes and pats my head.

" Later dear, go to sleep"

I nod, shutting down my hand and climbing on top of his thin frame hold his shoulders and laying my head on his chest.

" Night Tachi"

" Night baby"

..." Can I borrow $50-"

"No"

A.N: ( Im back like crack! Yall tis was my mannnn back in 89' like when I tell you he was BAD! He was, and yall I've been so tired like I tried to write but I couldn't so I'm post more now that I'm motivated.)

Like and comment who yall wanna see next!

#x black reader #black fem reader #chubby reader #black reader #itachi naruto #itachi x reader #itachi uchiha

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hplonesomeart · 1 month

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Heyyy….so I’m back to posting arts momentarily I guess (not like I went anywhere though. Still spending my life staring at a iPad screen for nine hours straight….hate this routine I loosely call “living” so much hahahahaha chronically online potato sack. Not doing so hot I can’t even anymore!)

Anyways uh-so I have a lot of scraped things because I’m loosing energy to do creative works I can’t keep pushing myself. Kinda accepted that I’ve weighed myself down exhausted myself with all this pressure and I need to let go. But it’s hard and honestly the last thing I want is fatigue again. But guess it’s a cycle for a reason huh. Can’t fight it off, just stuck powerless and letting it happen begrudgingly

So I made this unfinished gif (you can tell because the hand is missing and the background looks unidentifiable. Plus cigarette smoke just gave up on existing wow so relatable). Honestly I kinda set myself up to get stuck on the process of this anyways since I don’t like animating on Procreate. The layering frames system is a pain to navigate. Only reason I wanted to animate Mr. Puzzles using Procreate is for some level of gained “experience” and added brush diversity for the glitch effect. But guess it wasn’t enough to keep my attention. Started it on August 5th, probably abandoned it two days later or so. I don’t know it feels like a long long time ago by now but that’s just because I’ve been overwhelmed mentally and can’t keep track of days passing bye

And this is the simplified version (aka what I started with originally as a drawn base messy sketchy illustration)

#cw smoking #tw smoking #mr. puzzles fanart #mr. puzzles smg4 animation #mr. puzzles animation #puzzlevision animation #hahah can you tell I’m not feeling all that good about the state of my art and would prefer to avoid drawing attention to it!#yeah yeah you probably can I’m not even bothering to conceal how unstable I feel right now :)#one moment I’m chatting to myself enthusiastically about my interests and then next moment I feel like I’m incompetent and not good enough #just comparing myself to other animators who seem to have no difficulty finishing projects #why the hell can’t I do that? why do I get stuck and take so long #maybe I’m not cut out for it like I thought I was….#maybe I need to switch careers to voice acting instead or something #because as it is I’m getting sick of spending my days in my room animating away without anything to show for my work and time #ahahahaha wow being a creative sure is a double edge sword huh?? :))#damn wonder if Mr. Puzzles is gonna turn into a vent character for me oh boy can’t wait to see I wonder huh #venting in tags #update #hplonesome art

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sencubussubs · 8 months

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Let’s talk VISION BOARDS

hi lovelies <3

I am a little late to the start of the year but let’s talk VISION BOARDS!

oh my gosh i LOVE vision boards. Every. Single. Thing. i put on my vision board last year manifested - and boy i was NOT good at manifesting (i was overthinking, spiralling, constantly dipping out of believing in manifesting and myself.)

Low effort and loads of fun i absolutely recommend vision boards.

I mentioned in a previous post that part of how vision boards work is by familiarising your brain with seeing the people/places/objects etc on your vision board and partly with emotions! feeling like its all yours now.

So, how can we put an effective vision board together?

Well first, what do you want your year to look like?

your vision board can be for any amount of time, but i think year long ones are most common <3 (it doesn’t mean the manifestations will take a whole year!)

You can start with a pen and paper (or notes app) and write down what you want the next year to look like:

It may help to have some headings to organise sections of life. for example:

Career

Relationships

Travel

Experiences/ events

Material Goods

Then you can find specific people/places/things you want to manifest such as a specific career, car or ipad. A specific type of love language e.t.c.

Second lets get some useful apps:

- Pinterest (of course!)

- Picsart (or any photo collaging app or website)

(OR ALTERNATIVELY you can print out individual photos, cut, organise and glue down your photos on a piece of cardstock/paper or poster board- the world is your oyster baby!)

Apps in tow we can move onto the Third step

finding good pictures!

In my vision board from 2023 i didn’t think too hard about pictures - i found pictures that represented what i wanted, i whacked em where i thought they looked good, printed that baby out and slapped it next too my desk where i looked at it all the time. Not purposefully because i took the time to, but rather just because i would automatically be pulled to look at the bright colours whenever i went to sit down at my desk (and when i would die in my games and need to look away from my screen :P ).

While deciding to do a vision board for 2024 -only during this process did i check my 2023 vision board and realise everything manifested- i watched lots of youtube videos from people whose vision boards were successful. it gave me motivation and enthusiasm to make my vision board and i learned a couple handy tricks along the way:

due to my copy and paste not working on tumblr for some reason, i am going to list the youtubers at the end rather than linking them.

- Using pictures from YOUR point of view

select pictures where it looks like you are already in it - e.g. wanting to read loads in 2024? pictures of someone (with your skin tone) reading with the book in their lap (example pics at the end)

You can also take this further and cut out your own face and put it over people in pictures - sounds silly but it worked for Tam Kaur! (check her out)

- Find pictures that truly invoke the emotions you want to feel

want to be given flowers? don’t settle for any picture of someone giving flowers, find the one that makes you feel the way you feel when you imagine it happening. The one that makes it feel real and heartwarming.

- Make sure you enjoy looking at the pictures/ layout you use!

you are gonna look at this and ingest it subconsciously all the time, so make sure it looks nice! Hopefully the emotions you feel from the pictures will already help this - but we wanna make sure the underlying subconscious message is “this is all already mine” not “oh god i hate this thing”

- Putting it somewhere you often look

if you’re like me, you might not have a manifestation routine and don’t want to consciously decide to spend five minutes staring at the vision board. I placed the vision board next to my desk and schedule, i looked at it every time i sat down - especially because i liked the photos so much it always caught my eye - and whenever i looked away from my screen. This allowed me to subconsciously familiarise myself with all the people/places/things on there! I also had a wallpaper on my phone with another small vision board so i looked at it even more often :)

- lastly, your vision board is yours - you don’t have to share

Honestly i truly believe in keeping my manifestations to myself till after they materialise in the 3D, mostly because of the stress of having other people think you’re crazy - i know that this is also my fault due to everyone is you pushed out, but i feel like for a lot of baby manifesters this is a familiar feeling. Manifestation is your own journey - do not let anyone take away your belief or chip at your self concept!

I am going to make a post soon about addressing people asking about manifestations! <3

Final step: HAVE FUN

Enjoy the process and embody the version of yourself who is receiving all of this, It is done, this IS your 2024!

the list:

Here are all the youtubers whose videos i watched while creating my vision board for 2024 <3

- Tam Kaur

- Anila Sita 101

- Hailey gamba

- The Gem Goddess

I hope this helped and enjoy making your vision board!

bye lovelies!

Seeing people’s successes really motivates me so i might also make a post on the things i successfully manifested in 2023 with my vision board <3

#sencubus #loa #law of assumption #loassumption #loassblog #vision boards #successful vision boards #manifesting #manifestation #manifestation technique #manifestation techniques #manifestation methods #law of assumption techniques #law of assumption blog #mood boards #vision board #vision board 2024 #affirmations #neville goddard

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wonuumelody · 1 year

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“ The train ”

Xu Minghao / The8

pairing: Xu Minghao x gn!reader genre: soft, stranger crush. warning(s): none word count: 0.6k

synopsis : When you took the train to your grandfather's house, you met a really fascinating and mysterious man with a long and black coat.

It's been a long time since you took the train. Not since you were a kid, anyway. The last time you took it, you must have been eight years old, with your grandfather in China. Today, you were an adult and decided to visit your beloved grandfather in his little Chinese village.

When you got on the train you immediately took a seat next to the window, glad it was free. The sun beat softly inside the car, the pretty orange light brought charm and softness to the room. You had taken with you something to do, the book you were currently reading, your notebook and headphones as well as your iPad to listen to music and work (mostly draw) without disturbing the other passengers.

The ride began and from the beginning of this one you did not raise your eyes from your screen, busy drawing. Having finished a drawing you had started a week earlier, you raised your head to look out the window. In your field of vision you could see on the right side a long black coat, looking more closely you could see the face of the person wearing the coat. He was a brown haired man, with pretty eyes and slightly pointed ears on their extremities. The young man had his head turned to his window, sitting opposite you he couldn't see you.

When you came back to earth, you took back your iPad, he inspired you. You then began a quick sketch of the young man in black, starting with his silhouette and then drawing the background. Without you realizing it, the man had turned his attention, not to the book he had in his hand, but to you. He would see you watching him from time to time before refocusing on what seemed to him to be a drawing. A smile appeared on his face and his gaze was a mix of curiosity and amusement.

As you raised your face to look at him, you fell directly on his eyes, which were already on you. He gave you an absolutely charming smile before nodding to you, pointing to the empty seat in front of you. You nodded slightly and the young man moved from his seat to the one facing yours.

" - Good morning," he said.

"- Hello. . " you had replied, slightly embarrassed to be surprised.

Did I see you draw me? You know, that's very flattering.

"- That's right! I couldn't help it, I probably should have asked you before. Sorry. . .

- There's no harm, don't worry! May I see where you stand? "

When asked about the stranger, you nodded before showing him the beginning of your work. After I complimented you the discussion quickly came between the two of you. He was an absolutely charming man of unbelievable kindness and politeness.

After spending at least two hours talking and laughing together, the train docked at your stop, apologizing for having to leave, the young man grabbed your hand and slipped a piece of paper.

"By the way, my name is Xu Minghao. "

- Y/N. . . I am Y/N"

He looked at you with a smile before he saw you running away, your purse in your hand.

Once you got off the train, you took the time to look at the piece of paper he gave you. There was a phone number. You gently squeeze the paper in your hand before you put it in your purse, who knows maybe you'll call him one day.

_______________________________________________

Hi! I hope this story has pleased you.. I think hao didn't meditate before, that's why he went directly to you. Anyway, thank you so so much for reading, it really means a lot to me. Kisses <3

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shyvioletcat · 2 years

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A/N: EDIT! So I uploaded this on my IPad because i literally couldn’t wait to post so now it’s all prettified and I’ve added the tags too. If you’ve already read thank you so much, if you’re reading it because of the tag also thank you very much. Based on this prompt from @rowaelinprompts

~~~~~ It was just after lunch when Rowan got the call with a few good hours in the work day. It was coming from the high school his two eldest children attended and being in the middle of the day that was never a good sign. So he left the email he was working on half finished to see what kind of trouble one or both of his children had managed to get into.

“Hello,” Rowan said in his politest phone voice.

“Hello, Mr Whitethorn. This is Hazel calling from Orynth High School. I’m just calling to let you know that Elspeth isn’t feeling too well and it would probably be best if she was picked up.”

Rowan rubbed his forehead, it always stressed him out when any of his kids weren’t at their best. Aelin took a small amount of joy in pointing out his fussiness. “Okay, well my wife is at home. It might be best to give her a call.”

“Elsie has requested you specifically, and would very much like for you to be the one to come get her,” Hazel explained.

That made Rowan even more concerned. The high school had a strict no phone during school hours policy, and while he was on board with that action within the school right now he was resenting it. “Yeah alright, let her know I’ll be there in about 20 minutes.”

“Thank you, Mr Whitethorn. See you soon,” Hazel said and hung up.

Rowan took another minute or two to finish off the email on his screen, then he closed his laptop and slipped it into his bag. He sent a text off to Aelin letting her know that the school had called saying Elsie was unwell and that he’d text her with an update when he had it. For 16 years he tried his hardest not to keep his daughter waiting for him, and he wouldn’t be starting now. On his way out he stopped by his boss’s office and found Lorcan hunched over his desk, staring between a desktop and laptop screen. Rowan gave the thick wooden door a hard knock to get his attention. Lorcan looked up with his standard workplace scowl set on his face.

“Elsie isn’t well and needs to be picked up so I’m heading out to get her,” Rowan said.

Lorcan nodded, that scowl taking on a more parental quality. “She okay?”

“I’m not sure, they didn’t give me much information so she’ll have to fill me in when I get there,” Rowan explained.

“Let me know how she is,” Lorcan said, he’d always had a soft spot for Elsie. “Korby hasn’t been saying much lately, I think sports is picking up so they’re not spending so much time together.”

“Will do.”

After that it didn’t take Rowan long to get in his car and to be heading across town to the high school. Now that he thought about it Elsie hadn’t been looking well these past few days, she’d been pale and quieter than usual. That was mostly noticeable because her siblings had been a little more chaotic without her steady presence to calm them down. She hadn’t come to him, or Aelin for that matter, about anything. So it could be possible she was suffering in silence over gods knew what. The more Rowan thought about it, the tighter that knot of concern twisted in his gut. As parents he and Aelin had worked very hard to be open and honest with their children, they wanted them to know that they could come to either one of them with anything without judgement. If something was wrong and Elsie hadn’t felt that she could approach him about it…

With his parental instincts activated, Rowan had no time for hesitation when he arrived at the school. Yanking the handbrake up and getting out of the car was a series of fluid motions that had him moving as fast as he could. He headed to the administration building, his driver’s licence ready to show as proof of ID.

“Whitethorn, I got a call to pick up my daughter Elspeth Whitethorn-Galathynius,” he said as he laid the card down on the small counter. The woman at the reception took a look at his licence and then nodded.

“If you’d like to come through you can help her with her bag. She’s not looking well at all,” the woman said and pressed a button that released the lock on the security door.

“Thank you.” He was heading towards the door before the words had left his mouth.

The sickbay was just by the door he’d come through and Rowan readied himself to see his daughter. What he hadn’t expected was to find the room empty besides her floral design backpack. Behind him Rowan heard the sound of a toilet flushing and then another door creaking open. He turned, ready to move out of the way of whoever needed it, but found Elsie instead. She looked awful, her face was devoid of colour and she was slouched over herself like she could barely hold herself up.

“Elsie, love,” Rowan said softly, resisting the urge to sweep her into like he would have when she was little.

“I threw up,” she said, sounding as miserable as she looked.

“I’ll grab your bag and we’ll head home.”

He heard Elsie take in a deep breath. “They gave me some sick bags for the car, they’re on the bed.”

Rowan spied them and picked the few plastic bags up as he swung the backpack onto his shoulder. Elsie was leaning on the doorway, arms wrapped around herself. It made his heart ache to see his little girl in so much discomfort. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and let her lean on him. She almost gave him her full weight. Rowan wasn’t going to press her while they walked to the car, it was clear all her effort was going into keeping herself upright. When they got to Rowan’s silver SUV he opened the door and helped her in. Elsie managed to get her seatbelt on before she slumped in the seat.

His lips tightened, he was nearly biting his lip. She was seriously unwell.

Whether or not he should just take her straight to the hospital was rolling through his mind as he got into the driver’s seat after throwing the backpack into the back. Rowan knew he was jumping the gun and that he needed to talk to Elsie first before he made that decision. Hopefully she would be well enough to have that conversation with him. He started the ignition and Elsie groaned as the vibrations unsettled her, he needed to find out what was happening before he gave himself a brain aneurysm.

“I know you’re not feeling great, love,” Rowan said, “but I need to know if I need to take you to the hospital or not.”

“I don’t need to go to the hospital,” Elsie replied, sounding like she was about to cry.

“What’s wrong then?” he pressed, sounding entirely like the concerned father he was.

In response Elsie heaved, and Rowan blindly handed her the sick bags he’d stuffed into the centre console. She managed to sort it out before the heaving started in earnest. Rowan just waited, knuckles turning white on the steering wheel. When she was done Elsie grabbed a tissue to wipe her mouth, she chucked that into the bag before sealing it up.

“Elsie, love,” Rowan’s tone was near pleading now.

The first quiet sob shouldn’t have taken him by surprise, but it did. He risked a glance away from the road to see her with her face in her hands. Rowan didn’t want to push her but he was starting to panic. Something in his gut knew this was more than just a regular virus or a bug, and very honestly he was starting to have a suspicion and he was praying to the gods Elsie would deny it.

“Da,” the way she said that word had him bracing for impact, she hadn’t called him that in years. It reminded him of all those moments she had needed him when she was younger, when just the whisper of her voice and that single word would make him come running. Elsie took in a shuddering breath and said, “I’m pregnant.”

Rowan’s heart stopped in his chest. He’d heard her, but he couldn’t quite believe it. Elsie didn’t have a boyfriend, so if she was pregnant did that mean she had one but hadn’t told him? Had something else happened? If someone had hurt his baby girl Rowan might just be going to prison if he couldn’t get away with murder. That filled him with rage, so fast and fierce that he would need one of those vomit bags in a second. He’d skin whoever was responsible alive.

“Elsie, I know you’re feeling a lot and you’re probably freaking out right now, but I need you to tell me how this happened,” Rowan managed to get out as measured as he could. “I need to know so I can stay calm and do what’s best for you. You understand?”

“Yep,” was her simple answer.

“Okay, what I’m going to do is pull into that car park over there,” he nodded to the fast food restaurant just a little ways up, “and you can tell me everything and then we can go from there.”

There was a very loud sniffle. “Okay.”

Rowan nodded, bolstered with something to focus on. He’d once told himself that the first time Aelin went into labour was the longest night of his life, but as he cut through the traffic towards that car park this might be the new front runner. Five more minutes and he would have some answers, he could wait five more minutes. He’d waited hours and hours for Elsie to come into this world—this was nothing. The way his heart was pounding in his ears told him otherwise.

Pulling into a spot in the corner of the parking lot so they would be less likely to be disturbed Rowan turned the car off. He looked over at his daughter, her green eyes were still filled with tears and she was still looking deathly pale, but she looked a little better, like a little bit of weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Now Rowan just needed to help her bear the rest of it.

“How long have you known?” He thought he’d start with something simple.

“About a week,” Elsie admitted.

Rowan nodded, his eyes focusing on nothing as he bit down on the reflex to ask exactly why she hadn’t said anything until now.

“Did someone…” Rowan swallowed as the words got caught in his throat. “Elsie, did someone hurt you?”

He watched his daughter intently, watching for even the slightest hint something was amiss. But Elsie just shook her head, her fingers absentmindedly weaving together.

“No one hurt me Dad, I promise,” Elsie said and looked up at him, the last bit of confirmation that told him she was telling the truth.

“So, there’s a boyfriend then,” Rowan theorised.

Elsie shook her head this time. “Not exactly.”

Rowan was taken aback by that answer. He’d expected an admission of a secret rebellious boyfriend. Teenagers were teenagers, and Rowan wasn’t ignorant of what they got up to. He’d been fairly mild himself but he had been privy to what his friends got up to in their spare time. Lorcan and Fenrys in particular didn’t hold much back in their storytelling. Elsie didn’t seem the kind for a careless fling, and yet here they were.

“Alright, not exactly a boyfriend. Who’s the—“ he literally stumbled over the word. This was a concept his brain was struggling to get up to speed on. And maybe he could do without knowing right now. “Can you enlighten me on the situation some more?”

Elsie’s fingers unwove, her hands were trembling a little.

“Elsie, what’s going on?” Rowan asked, his nervousness spiking again.

“I’m gonna tell you but you have to promise me you’ll let me get it through it all before you say anything, okay?” Elsie was sounding more herself so Rowan nodded. “It was a friends with benefits situation. We, ah… it was a trust thing to start with and then we decided that it was fun I guess. I’ve been—“ while she spoke her emotions had built up again and tears were falling onto her cheeks. “I didn’t know how to say any of this. I didn’t want you to be disappointed with me.”

“That’s not what I’m thinking about right now.” Rowan tried to keep his voice even. It was passable. “Does he know?”

“He doesn’t. Only you do,” Elsie said.

“Alright, okay,” Rowan muttered, then he put on his bravest face—the kind only a parent could summon when they were reassuring their child when they weren’t all that sure themselves. “I think I need your mother before we talk more about this.”

Elsie laughed, wiping at her nose. “You always need Mum.”

Rowan smiled. “That I do. But first do you need anything?”

There was a moment of silence where Elsie just looked downright confused, like maybe she had expected him to drill her for more information or scold her or maybe just brood in silence. While those options were tempting, that was not what his daughter needed from him in this moment. It was clear she was hurting and probably scared out of her mind. Losing it on her in any way would not be beneficial and Rowan was starting to feel out of his depth. It was time to regroup with Aelin by his side.

“We could take our chances and see if the ice cream machine is working,” Rowan jerked his head towards the fast food restaurant. Elsie’s eyes lit up and she nodded. “Let’s go then.”

Rowan spent the rest of the drive home expecting Elsie to hurl her guts up again. He hadn’t been able to stomach one himself but it seemed the frozen sugar filled dairy was in fact what she needed. Just like her mother when she was pregnant. That thought was jarring to say the least and Rowan tried not to dwell on it. He just concentrated on getting home and how they were going to explain this whole thing to Aelin. They drove up the driveway and he stopped outside the garage door. Elsie was looking up at the house with wide eyes.

“No escaping this one,” Rowan said. “We go in, tell your mother, and then we talk about this some more, okay?”

“Is she gonna be mad?” Elsie's eyes darted over to her father.

Rowan sighed. “Probably, it’s going to be a shock and we all know Mum doesn’t take surprises well.”

“Unless she’s the one springing them,” his daughter added.

Rowan huffed a laugh. “Exactly. But remember love,” he touched her cheek to get her attention. “No matter what, we’re on your side.”

Elsie’s lips twitched in a brief smile. “You always are.”

“Now give me that bag of spew and you start getting yourself inside.”

Rowan hadn’t cleaned up Elsie’s vomit in years and it was as gross as it had always been. Regardless he still did it, throwing it in the trash then following Elsie to the front door. She was moving slowly, most likely waiting for him so they could face Aelin together. Rowan understood her hesitancy, and was understanding why Elsie had asked for him to pick her up. Aelin’s temper ran hot and fast, something Rowan loved about his wife. But it was sometimes hard taking the brunt of it and he hoped today she had a saint’s patience to level it out. This would test her.

Leading the way into the house, Rowan announced their arrival. “Fireheart, we’re home.”

“Finally,” he heard from the living room. “You didn’t text me anything, I was getting worried.”

Elsie grimaced at those words.

Rowan walked into the living room just off their entryway. “I was driving.”

Aelin barely gave him a second glance before she rushed past him and had Elsie in her arms. Her hands were checking for temperature, her turquoise eyes running a scrutinising gaze over her. From how awful Elsie still looked it was very apparent that something wasn’t right.

“What is it, Elsie? What’s wrong?” Aelin asked when she came up with no conclusions of her own.

“We should sit down,” Rowan said and Aelin’s eyes narrowed.

Elsie ended up in the armchair and Rowan took Aelin to the long couch by the hand. They sat down and Aelin kept hold of his hand as she cocked her head at him.

What is going on? Her suspicious eyes asked him.

Rowan sighed, giving Aelin a look of his own. We need to listen to her.

“Mum,” Elsie said, her voice sounding so small, but it drew their attention. “I need to tell you something.”

Aelin looked between her husband and her daughter, knowing that she was the only one in the room without the vital information.

“I’m listening,” Aelin said.

“I’m pregnant, Mum.”

“You’re what?” Aelin’s voice was sharp and Rowan gave her hand a squeeze as a quick reminder to stay calm.

Their daughter took in a deep breath and Rowan knew she was about to divulge everything. “I’ve been sleeping with Korbin, it’s a friends with benefits thing and one time we got careless and I thought I was at the part of my cycle where I couldn’t get pregnant but I did. And I’ve only known for about a week and I’m so scared, Mum. I’m… I just…”

By the end of her little speech Elsie was crying again but Rowan didn’t see it, he was busy watching the reactions from his wife. Aelin’s jaw was tight and he was sure that if it had been any quieter he would have heard her teeth grinding together. Rowan knew she was weighing her words before she spoke. Rowan found himself reeling at that new little bit of information Elsie had just dropped.

Rowan’s brain went painfully still. Korbin. Korbin was Elsie’s best friend since she could walk. He was just a year older and nearly all their lives they had been inseparable. This was a development in their relationship Rowan was struggling to get his head around. Seeing them together there had been no hint of romance, not ever. Korbin Salvaterre had got his daughter pregnant.

“Korbin?” Aelin’s voice was a little too high, clearly struggling just as much as he was.

Elsie nodded.

“Does he know?” Now she was sounding more lethal.

“No, only Dad knows and I told him today in the car,” Elsie said.

Aeln’s hand went to her mouth, her eyes going a bit distant. Rowan wasn’t sure if that was just shock or if she was planning some kind of slow torture on the Salvaterre boy.

“Fireheart,” Rowan prompted.

“Hmm,” she hummed but didn’t say anything else for the moment. “He’s ah… he was your best friend.”

Elsie swallowed hard. “He still is.”

“Are you in love with him?”

The question caught Rowan off guard, so much so he nearly jumped. He looked over to Elsie to see her reaction, a new wave of tears had started and she nodded furiously before she buried her face in her hands.

Holy gods Rowan had missed that entirely.

“Oh, my little love,” Aelin said and then she was moving, squeezing onto the armchair beside her daughter and wrapping her arms around Elsie’s shoulders.

This was a development Rowan wasn’t expecting. Today he not only found out that his daughter was pregnant to the son of his best friend, but also that his daughter was in love with that son and yeah, maybe he was going to be a grandfather by the time he was forty five.

“Elsie,” Rowan said and two sets of eyes landed on him. “What do you want to do?”

“We will support whatever you decide,” Aelin added without missing a beat.

“I want to keep it, I think,” Elsie said bravely.

Something flipped in Rowan’s chest at that but it was Aelin who said, “Okay, we can work with that.”

Elsie turned and threw her arms around Aelin’s neck and let her mother hold her close for a long while. It was Aelin who eventually pulled back, brushing Elsie’s blonde hair away from her tear stained face.

“Why don’t you go up and have a shower and then we’ll talk about this a little more,” Aelin said softly. “Make some plans?”

Elsie nodded and left, Rowan blew her a kiss that earned him a sad smile. When she was gone from the room he turned back to his wife who was sitting very still. “Fireheart?”

That sprung her into action and she was on her feet, pacing in a way that could only be described as furious.

“Pregnant,” she hissed. “Our 17 year old daughter is pregnant. How did this happen?”

The shock was leaving him and it was being replaced by something that was suspiciously close to delirium. “Um…”

Aelin threw a silencing hand in his direction. “Do not try and be funny right now.”

Rowan kept his mouth shut. His wife paced some more before she gasped on hand on her chest. She looked horrified.

“I’m going to be a grandparent,” Aelin turned so she was facing Rowan fully. “Not only that but I am going to be a grandparent with Lorcan Salvaterre.”

She said it like her worst nightmares were coming true, it made Rowan chuckle. Which in turn earned him a scathing look.

“We’ll get through this, Aelin,” Rowan said. “We always do. To whatever end, remember?”

Aelin came over and flopped onto the couch next to him, sighing and staring up at the ceiling. “Our baby is having a baby.”

Rowan pulled his wife closer and kissed her forehead. “Yeah she is.”

They sat there for a long while, just processing everything. The reprieve was broken when the front door was thrown open and as if summoned by the talk of children their two youngest ran in. They both yelled their hellos before running up the stairs.

“Evalin! Adaira! Shoes off please!” Aelin called after them. At 9 and 8 respectively the shoes off at the door rule was sometimes overlooked.

Their middle child closed the door for his siblings and did indeed take his shoes off.

“Thank you, son,” Rowan said to Cinaed. “Can you give the little ones a hand? We just need a moment.”

He shook his silver hair out of his turquoise eyes. “Sure Dad.”

“The bus with the other one should be here soon,” Rowan said, returning his gaze to the ceiling.

Aelin sighed, sounding tired. “Let’s hope he’s a little more quiet than the others.”

Rowan hummed his agreement and was preparing a speech about leaving their eldest sister be for the rest of the Whitethorn-Galathynius children when Finnian walked in. That was expected, but Rowan wasn’t prepared for who he else had stepped under his roof. Both Salvaterre boys walked in behind their own son and Aelin tensed beside him. Rowan rested a hand on Aelin’s knee to keep her where she was. Seeing Korbin after everything they had learned today was like putting a finger on the trigger of a gun. One wrong move and the calm they had managed to keep themselves in would be lost.

“Hey Aunty Aelin, hi Uncle Rowan,” Eamon said. “Finn said there would be snacks.”

“Of course he did,” Aelin breathed. “Finn, can you go upstairs and tell Elsie to stay in her room for a bit?”

“I heard Elsie came home early,” Korbin said, dropping his bag by the door. “I thought something was up, she hasn’t been talking to me as much lately.”

“Is that so?” Aelin bit out, if the boy had been smarter he’d be running for his life.

Korbin’s dark eyes were darting between the parents in the room. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

Rowan thought he was doing a good job schooling his features. But now that he was a little more conscious of what he was doing he realised he was glaring.

“Finnian, now,” Aelin added when she saw that their son hadn’t moved. He groaned in that dramatic teenage way like he’d just been asked to run a marathon and loped towards the stairs.

Unfortunately, because he didn’t listen the first time, Elsie was halfway down the stairs before she saw who was in the living room. Her hair was still wet and she looked a bit brighter than she had before.

“Korbin,” she whispered. “What are you doing here?”

His face turned charming as he slid his hands into his pockets. “I wanted to see how you were. I heard around school that you were sick and I wanted to check on you. They said you threw up and everything.”

“Oh,” Elsie said, then her mouth clamped shut and tears were brimming in her eyes again.

The silence that developed was tense and Korbin moved towards the stairs, Elsie seemed frozen in place. Rowan was about to get up and step between them as his protective instincts rose to the surface but Elsie took her own initiative.

“I’m pregnant,” she blurted.

Korbin took a single step back.

“Oh, shit,” Finnian said, reading the room a little too well.

“Yeah,” Korbin said, sounding as though he was in a daze and scrambling back a few steps. “Okay, yeah.”

And that was all he said before he just turned on his heels and walked right back out that front door. Rowan was up then, not quite believing what he’d just witnessed.

Eamon was confused, unlike Finnian he hadn’t quite caught on. “What just happened?”

Elsie was looking towards the door, stunned and any energy she had recovered drained right out of her again. In that moment Rowan hated that boy, he hated that through a few thoughtless actions he had caused Elsie so much pain. The only thing stopping Rowan from chasing after that idiot boy and hauling him back by the scruff of his neck were the tears in his daughter's eyes. He could only watch as Elsie fled up the stairs and Aelin rushed after her a heartbeat later.

“What just happened?”

It took little Eamon voicing his confusion to get Rowan moving and he was heading up the stairs, taking two at a time. Elsie’s door was half way closed, but Rowan stepped through the doorway into the room. The sight that greeted him nearly broke his heart. Aelin had her arms wrapped around Elsie in a hug, his daughter wept and Aelin had unshed tears in her eyes. His wife looked over at him, her face set in a determined fierceness that told him that she would defend Elsie’s fragile heart at all costs.

Gods help that boy when his consequences came chasing after him.

~~~~~

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#throne of glass fanfiction

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