#i spend way too much time longing. that's for sure. someday i'll get it right

[fairymint]

What’s a tip you would give to people trying to get to know you?

i'd say that my attitude both matches and is contrary to what normal society would expect of me. The more favorable or safe you are to me, the softer i feel about you. meanwhile, the people (mostly IRL) who act all tough or negative only get attitude, really.

but also, atm i don't really display (platonic) affection as much as i would be comfortable with.

[thetopichot]

•°♧ Late Night Phone Call P. 2 ♧°•

Hi Hello & Bienvenidos al final de Late Night Phone Call. I don't really speak much spanish even though I'm Peutro Rican but I do somewhat speak it. However, that's not watcha here for. You're here for the Yuuriboys‼️‼️ Anyway, lemme shut my trap & get the crap.

•°◇ Faust ◇°•

It was a long fucking night. Both of you guys were doing a livestream in person which was a long awaited event amongst all of your fans. The whole night you & Faust were sitting next to eachother on the couch as you live streamed a party game while also joined by your other friends on Discord. People in chat were commenting on how much Faust was so in love with you by the way he was looking at you. Faust told them to knock it off but his red face doesn't help.

After one final game, you guys said goodbye to your viewers & stopped the stream. You were both exhausted since the stream went on for 5 hours which is the most the both of you have ever done but spending time together was very much worth it. "I totally kicked your ass at Jackbox", you boasted, "You were so ass at Triva Murder Party."

Faust groans as he rolled his eyes. "Well, I'm not as much a nerd like you. However.." Faust showed you a soft smile. "I did have fun."

"You sound like you never had fun before." You playfully teased him. He just gives you a dramatic scoff.

"I have fun! I have tons of fun!" He put his hands on his hips. "I'm literally the embodiment of fun! People wish upon stars to be as fun as moi!"

"Uh-huh, sure. Whatever makes ya feel better, love." He just turns away from you like the brat he is. You really can't take him seriously when he's like this because of how cute he is. The sassy man apocalypse was truly upon us. You just pulled him closer to you by his hips & just gave a kiss on the cheek. "Jeez, you're such a brat."

"Don't think being sweet to me is gonna make up for you being mean to me."

"Your smile says otherwise, lovely." Faust was always bad at hiding his smile. It never truly helped his situation when he was trying to deny it since his denial made him smile even more. You kept kissing his cheek.

"Oh shut up. Don't you have to go home anyway?" Faust reminded you.

You stopped & looked at the time on your phone. "Oh, you're right. I do." You got up from the couch & grabbed your bag then headed towards the handle of the door. You looked back at Faust as you slowly opened the door. "I'll see you sometime, yeah?" He nodded.

"Yeah. I'll see you later."

It was about one hour later after your little get together with Faust & some of your online games. You were in your kitchen fixing yourself a plate of some leftovers that you made yesterday. As you put your plate in the microwave to reheat it, you get a text from your phone.

Hey Starshine

Well, lookie loo. It's your pookie, Faust.

Yea?

What are you up to rn

I'm just chefing up some leftovers.

Why?

Oh nothing I just wanted to check up on you

Awww, you care about little ol' me?

Of course I do you ass

You hate admitting that you like me. 😘

I dont like you

I love you

I find you annoying 🙄

But youre lucky I find it endearing

Otherwise I would be such a brat

Well. Hate to break to ya.

You already are.

I mean MORE of a brat smartass

I know.

🖕🏻

Love you too, pookie. 😘

...

Love you more

You closed your phone & grabbed your plate from the microwave. After you finished eating, you cleaned your plate & went straight to the bathroom to take a shower. It always felt rewarding after long day but the more you thought about it that said reward. You wish you could enjoy it with someone. Maybe someone you loved.

'Maybe someday.' You thought. 'Maybe someday...' You hopped out of the shower & put on ya jammies then went straight to bed but that wasn't all for the night. Those bits of longing became more louder in your head then it slowly became more than just that. You wanted him. You needed him.

But you were alone in your room staring blankly at the ceiling as you wished this bed was filled with warmth. Not just any warmth. Faust. Maybe you should text him. He's most likely still up right now.

STARRRRRR

You heard a vibration from your phone. You grabbed your phone & looked at the message. Huh, speak of the devil.

Yeah?

YOU WOMF BELIEVE WHAT JUSF HAPPENED

THIS IS A GET THE FUXK ON CALL MOMMENT

BUT FIRSTTTTT

WAIT

okayvthere we go I had turn off caps

Are you busy rigut now???

No not really.

And before you ask, yes. I can get on call with you, love.

THANK YOU THANK YOUUUUU

Faust is calling...

"BITCHHHHHHHH!" Faust always starts strong as always. That's what you loved most about him. "TROYE SIVAN JUST FUCKING DROPPED HIS SINGLE ON SPOTIFY!" He was practically screeching like a banshee but you never minded. His happiness is what mattered a lot to you & you always enjoyed how he expressed it.

"Well, ain't that something? I assuming you're really hyped about it." You tried to sound enthusiastic but you were a bit tired.

"HYPED?! I'M MORE THAN HYPED! I'M-" You heard his phone dropped. "Ah fuck. Shit shit shit." You fucking cackled. You could hear him scrambling to get his phone.

"You dropped me, asshole! That fucking hurt!" You joked. He finally picks his phone back up. "Thank you, jeez."

"OK! Anyway, where was I? TROYE FUCKING SIVAN!!" Before he could say any more, you interrupted him.

"Hey, Faust?"

He paused. "Yeah?"

"Thank you." Faust felt confused by that statement.

"For what?"

"For being you." You said wholeheartedly. "Thank you for being you." Faust smiled.

"That sounds cheesy as hell but.." He took some time to get the word out. "Thank you & I also wanted to ask you about something."

"Yeah?"

"You don't mind if we stay on call for a little longer?" You laughed. "What's so funny?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing. I'm kinda having trouble sleeping. So I wouldn't mind listening to you talk."

"Well, good." He said confidently. "Because I drank a shit load of coffee & I'm going to be up for awhile." You were taken aback.

"Why are were you drinking coffee this late?"

"What are you? A narc?" He said offendedly. "Me drinking coffee is none of your business."

"Were you grinding on Overwatch again?" Faust went silent. "Faust?"

"N-No." He was. He was grinding on Overwatch again.

"I guess you're not the only one that needs to go sleep." You chuckled softly. "I assuming you're at your desk?"

"Yeah, I am." He admitted to that at least.

"So how about this.." You quickly thought of something. "You turn off your game, lay down in your bed, & we can help eachother go to sleep?"

"Yeah. That sounds nice."

•°♧ Finn ♧°•

Finn was working late tonight, surprisingly. Normally, he would close at least at 6:00pm. Not only that, he should be home by now. It's like what? 9:00 pm? You were starting to get worried so you sent him a text to see what was going on.

Finn? Baby? Where are you?

No text from him. Okay, now this shit is getting really fishy which made your suspicion rise. However, you trust Finn & he's probably just busy right now. You've noticed that Finn has been working himself to the bone lately. There was times where you found him passed out on the couch.

You asked him what was going on since you noticed him getting exhausted by the day. He just told you that "You shouldn't worry about me, sunflower! I'm just getting more orders than usual now." Of course, you are happy for him that his flower shop is gaining more attraction. However, him becoming too much of a workaholic didn't sit right with you at all. You wanted him to be okay.

So for the bit of the night, you just sat in your bed waiting for him. You couldn't go to sleep with the fact that he's exhausted. You want to at least hear that he's okay or just something that you can do to help Finn. Jeez, that boy was always so hard on himself & you just wanted him to be safe. 'Please, Finn,' You thought, 'Please be alright.'

Finn is calling...

"Finn, love?" You said as you picked up the phone.

"I just saw your text & I'm so so sorry!" Finn panicked quickly.

"Woah, slow down. Take a breath." You could Finn taking a quick breather. "Finn? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"I'm.. fine?" Okay, yeah no. Bro was in fact not fine.

"Finn. Please don't lie to me. You've been stressed out for awhile now. I need you to tell me the truth." You said firmly. "What is going on?"

"I've.. been doing some orders." He explained. "The thing is.. The thing is that I've been getting so many orders & especially when business has been blooming. I-I didn't really wanted to stop there. So.." Finn paused. "I've been pulling some all nighters."

"I thought I could.. handle it." He sounded disappointed in himself. "I'm sorry."

"Finn, baby. I know you can handle it but there are times where you can really push yourself to the edge." You comforted him. "I love that you work hard but if you keep pushing yourself like this.." A silence filled the room then was soon broken by you. "Please. I love you, Finn. If anything bad happened to you, I don't know what I would do."

"Please come home." Those words felt comforting yet sounded so hurt. He could feel the pain in your soul & he hated it. He always hated it he made you upset & when he did, he felt like the whole thing was his fault. However, you always reminded him that he always wanted the best for the both you & that his heart was always in the right place.

You loved him & he loved you. He was always scared of disappointing you since he wants to be the best boyfriend for you but there are times where he forgets to take care of himself. He couldn't come yet for there are things still left to do.

"I would, my love.." He broke the news to you. "But I've still got a few things I need to do." Your heart once more fills with worry for Finn. "I do have some good news! I'm just cleaning up shop & then I'm calling it a night." He heard your worried sigh but luckily, there was something that always make you two feel better.

"Maybe I can help you fall asleep with my floral facts while I clean up?" He said reassuringly. "Then when you wake up, I'll be right by your side."

"You promise?" You asked him. "You promise you'll be home with me & not push yourself too much?"

"I promise, my lovely little bunny."

•°♤ Seth ♤°•

Seth was stuck at the mechanics. His motorcycle that he usually takes to work broke down on him as he was finishing clocking out for the night. Luckily, his boss was nice enough to let him stay a little longer in the garage to check out what was wrong with his bike & he gave Seth all of the tools that he needed. Now, he was checking the engine until he got a text from his phone. He opened it.

Babe?

Are you alright?

yea im fine, sug

what's the matter?

Well, you're missing that's what's the matter.

aww ya missing me, sweetheart?

Well, yeah. My bed is empty & I don't see your boobs in my area of vision so, I'm sad.

so ya miss my boobs? that's it?

nothin else catch ya eye?

Your ass.

Your heart, too.

But your heart is inside your boobs, so I'm gonna just say boobs.

Seth laughed at the text. He loved how funny you are. He loved how you always make him smile despite being far apart. Your love was always there even if it came with weird, flirty metaphoric messages that always had to do with his boobs but hey, you both have weird ways of showing affection & that's just mighty fine with the both of you.

But for real though, where are you?

Are you stuck working the late shift again?

nah ain't nothin like that, sugar

it's just my motorcycle broke down on me

AS i was leaving too

Damn. Do you know why though?

not necessarily

my boss let me use the garage to check it out so

i might be stuck here for while

You know if you want.

I could be keep you company.

Like we could get on a call.

Plus I feel lonely without you. 😔

I miss my yeehaw boy.

yeehaw boy???

you know what fine i'll join ya

Seth is calling...

"Yeehaw boy?" Seth sounded so bewildered. "What in the sam hell is a fucking yeehaw boy?" You could only snort in laughter as a response. "Ay, don't be laughing at me! I'm too tired to be dealing with ya damn silly antics, sugar!"

"I'm sorry, baby." You giggled. "When I mean yeehaw boy, I meant as in cowboy." You explained to me. "You probably do say yeehaw unironically."

"No, the hell I don't!" The more you teased him, you could hear his southern accent fucking worsen.

"Your southern drawl worsening doesn't help you either, babe."

"You! You shaddup!" Seth was trying so hard to laugh & keep his accent together. "You're really mean to me, ya know that?" He put his phone beside him & grabbed a wrench. "You always enjoy teasing me!"

"Whaaaat? I'm not mean. You're just a big ol' goober that happens to do silly things & I find them funny."

"Sugar. That's LITERALLY definition of teasing! You are a bully!" He playfully accused you.

"Nuh-uh." Seth paused what he was doing.

He looked at his phone. "The fuck you mean 'Nuh-uh'??" You could only cackle like a wicked witch on halloween night in reponse. Seth sighed. "This is gonna be a long ass night, ain't it?"

"Maybe." You said with a smirk. Seth couldn't help but chuckled.

"Jeez, what would I do without ya?" He said with a genuine smile.

"I dunno. What would you do without me?"

"I don't wanna even think about it, sugar." Seth answered. "What I do want to think about is how much I love you."

"You getting sappy on me, Seth?" You teased.

"I could stop being sappy & be a asshole." Seth teased back.

"Nah. I like you sappy." You smiled.

"Good cuz' I like being sappy, too."

☆ミ Author's Notes Underneath 👇 ☆ミ

🩷 - This is probably isn't as good as P.1 but hey, the curse is released & I can finally do that monthly poll. My personal favorite is probably Faust since it's kinda based off a real life conversation that I had with my friend. This took longer than expected because I was hoping to get this finished by Monday but, shit kept happening to me & I kept forgetting to write.

However now that this is done, I can finally live in peace knowing that I finished it & you guys finally get to read it after the many times I said that I was gonna write it. 😭😭 Once again, super sorry about that. Anyways, it's finished & thank you very much for your patience. It's always appreciated.

[puhpandas]

Halloween Spirit

(1,770 words)

Evan learns that the spirit of Halloween comes with enjoying spending time with people you love during the season, and thats why he'd never felt anything of the sort with Michael and his father. 🍫🎃🕷

"Have you ever been to Spirit Halloween?" Gregory asks him someday when they're hanging out at his house. Evan looks up from one of Gregory's drawings he was coloring in and tilts his head.

"No." Evan replies after a moment. And hes never wanted to, either. Not only would getting there mean either his Father or Michael would have to take him, but he knows Michael gets all of the scary masks he terrifies Evan with there. Plus that there are animatronics with uncanny molds and bloody faces and long fingers and black cloaks that jump out and scream at you.

So hes never really had an urge to go. Hence why he's literally never been.

"Never?!" Gregory exclaims when he learns about it. He jumps up off of his bed, shaking his head. "Evan, going to Spirit Halloween is like... it's like a major life event. Its tradition. You go to Spirit Halloween every year during the season to get pumped for it."

"I've never heard of that." Evan replies. "I've just... never had a reason to go."

He purposefully leaves out all the reasons he never has wanted to go. He doesnt want to be a Debbie Downer.

"Well now you do." Gregory tells him. He grabs the sketchbook out of Evan's hands, setting it on his comforter and then yanking Evan off the bed with suprising strength. "I'm taking you to Spirit Halloween today. No take backs."

Evan yelps, and only narrowly avoids eating carpet. "I never even agreed in the first place." Evan points out. After he doesnt pull away, Gregory let's him go to slide his shoes on. "But... sure. I'll go with you."

"Yes!" Gregory pumps a fist, slipping a navy hoodie on. With a faint smile at Gregory's excitement, Evan stays how he is, already wearing a plenty warm wool sweater. All he has to do is pull his own converse on and they're out the door.

"How have you never been?" Gregory comments when they've set off, following the sidewalk. The trees have long since all turned reds and oranges and yellows, and they flutter in the pleasant breeze the Autumn season is producing. Pumpkins and skeletons and spiderwebs decorate every yard theyve passed, and store windows hold those jelly stick-on's. "Pretty much everyone has."

"Nobody's ever taken me." Evan replies, shrugging. "My family doesnt really decorate. Especially now that its just us."

Before, when his Mom and Elizabeth were still living with them, there would be the occasional decorating. Elizabeth would whine and push for something seasonal to celebrate and his parents would cave and buy some cheap decorations to sling up around the house. But that was years ago, when he was a much younger kid. Now, hes thirteen, and its just him, Michael, and their Father.

Evan dares to think Michael would actually like to have decorations up. It's just that he believes he's 'too cool' for things like that. He's always enjoyed Halloween, if not for access to extra scary masks then to run around town with his friends to spook other innocent children. Plus, the king size candy bars he always brings home have to mean something.

Evan's never really had a reason to like it when every time he'd dress up he'd be made fun of in some sort of way, and then actively targeted as soon as he'd step outside. Plus, everything Michael likes about Halloween, Evan dislikes.

But Evan dares to believe this year will be different. The reason being right next to him.

"God, your family is so boring." Gregory groans. "Nobody even took you like... when you were a kid years ago?"

"Nope."

"Ugh." Gregory makes a face, slinging an arm around Evan's shoulder. "Well thats why you dont like Halloween. Because your family has always sucked too bad to let you enjoy it."

Evan nods sagely, knowing its true. His family always makes Halloween what they do or dont do. And usually, Evan's never cared enough to wish for a better, more seasonal holiday. He's always been too worried about other things to be in any sort of joyful mood.

"Well, dont worry about it right now, alright?" Gregory tells him, shooting him a grin. "This year you'll get to experience real Halloween. We'll get you a costume and take you to see cool stuff, and you'll get to do stuff like carve pumpkins and bake cookies with us."

Evan's eyes widen at the influx of activities. He's only ever done maybe a couple of those throughout his whole life.

He looks at Gregory earnestly, brain already flashing with images of Evan laughing and smiling, flinging cookie batter at Gregory, costume shopping without the lingering paranoia, and digging his hands inside a pumpkins guts.

The promise of having fun with people he actually likes, who like him back is so overwhelming, he almost tears up.

He pushes it down, offering Gregory a wobbly smile. "That... that sounds fun."

"It always is!" Gregory boasts, and Evan is convinced he can see stars in his eyes. "Man, I wish Ness were here. I really want her to meet you. It would be so cool spending Halloween with both of you.

There goes another mention of the infamous older-sister-away-at-college. Evan's heard a few of those, but it's not what he focuses on in that moment.

Something about Gregory putting him on the same level as his biological sibling makes something warm and fluttery bloom in Evan's stomach.

"You'll get to introduce me someday." Is all Evan manages to get out, and he almost backtracks at the implication in his sentence that Gregory will be willing to stick by him that long. But Gregory just smiles, shakes his shoulders a bit, and goes "She'll love you."

Evan hides his smile in the collar of his sweater. If Gregory is so sure, Evan cant wait to meet her, too.

It's not long at all afterwards that they finally make it to the store. Evan thinks it looks very bare bones, compared to how Gregory was describing it, but Gregory just says not to judge a book by its cover.

Gregory was right. The inside is what counts.

Halloween decorations fill very inch, gravestones and spiderwebs and skeletons waiting to greet you. There are tons of different mini-sets around the store with animatronics, and despite how Evan stays as far away from the animatronics as possible, Gregory's excitement over them make him feel better about how creepy they are.

Evan's favorite section though has to be the costume wall.

It's just a shelf full of silly costumes stuffed in bags from floor to ceiling, and it stretches across almost the entire store.

"Ness and I used to spend hours here just making fun of the costumes." Gregory had said after bringing him to it. "Look at the model on this one."

Then he'd pointed at a dumb looking werewolf, and when Evan had burst out laughing, they'd kept going.

The daylight outside slowly fizzles out in the corner of Evan's vision, in the foreground. That gray, cloudy sky that comes with Autumn fading into a dark, deep blue. By the time its their turn to leave, Evan's cheeks hurt from smiling and his throat is dry from how much he had talked and laughed.

Before they go, Gregory insists on buying Evan a Halloween sweater, no matter how much he'd protested. It's another thing he insists is tradition.

When Gregory didnt budge, Evan caved and chose a really soft black one with and orange collar and a Jack-o-lantern in the middle. Gregory had chosen one for himself, then proceeded to get attached to one of the plastic inaccurate skeleton animals and buy it too. They'd named the little dog with bone ears and a bone nose Davey.

Evan never imagined that this is what the spirit of Halloween is like, but he feels it now more than he ever has. It reminds him of those Christmas movies he'd see on TV where the lesson would be that the true meaning of Christmas is spending time with your family.

As sad as it sounds, Evan never understood those. But he thinks he gets it now.

Because the contrast between last year and this year is so stark. It's not the fact that he went to a Halloween store. If he'd gone last year with Michael and his Father, he would have been miserable, because Michael would try to make him be. This year, he had fun looking at silly stuff with Gregory.

Its only now, when Gregory is handing cash over to the employee behind the counter, who'd just bagged their sweaters and Davey, that he realizes just how much Gregory is his best friend.

They only met in July, after all... but even that feels like a lifetime ago, despite how the school days went by so much quicker with a friend, no longer so awful.

Funny how Evan already feels closer with a boy hes known for a few months than he ever has with his brother and father.

"Can I sleep over?" Evan asks when they break through the doors of the store and the cool air of Autumn washes over his face. He breathes in the scent of fallen leaves and actually notices a difference, this time.

He's feeling bold, he realizes. Scenarios of how he could get in trouble for not asking flash in his mind, but he notices he doesnt really care in the moment.

Gregory, like how telepathic he feels sometimes, notices too. He grins, acknowledging the significance, and nods, bringing out his phone. "Let me call my Dad and we'll swing by your house to grab you a bag."

Evan nods, smiling himself. He plays with the plastic of the bag in-between his fingers, peeking at Davey through the gaps.

"When we get home, I'll make some popcorn and hot chocolate, and then you gotta watch this movie with me. I watch it every year for Halloween."

Evan nods repeatedly, smile already growing on his face. After today, hes sure itll be fun.

They sit on the curb, leaves floating through the breeze, and a light sprinkle starts just in time for Freddy to pull into the driveway.

They hop in the car and Evan watches the scenery outside, looking at people decorations and imagining how he'd carve his own pumpkin, or ice his own cookies.

He'd never cared before now. He'd never cared because he'd never been given the chance to. But now he does. And all he's thinking about is how much 'going home' with Gregory feels right.

ao3 link

bonus: this is Davey

[togetherhearted]

COMMISSION FOR @mahou-shoujo-persephone ♡ Thanks so much for trusting me

PANDORA AND LULU FLUFF

Love at first sight;what a splendid yet crazy concept. The mere idea of thinking you found your true love as your eyes met theirs makes some hearts throb.

This what happened when Pandora met Lulu after she fell in a foreign place.

And what if I tell you that it was not only a love at first sight but a cliché event?

Your loved-hated bumping into each other when turning around a corner. Books falling from the arms of one of the two;The touch of hands while getting them back.

Now, Pandora and Lulu weren't in a school, running to next class;still, they indeed collided together.

Long story short Pandora fell, first and hard.

Though she never rushed in;her shyness taking the best of her.

This was a love story on tip-toes;quiet and slow.

-I think Lulu likes you very much;more than friends-

Those words made Pandora very happy. At the end the time she spent with her finally brought them close, so close they now could date.

-I do, too-

And a wonderful relationship bloomed from there.

Time flies when you are having fun. Time flew for the two of them. They grew together, spending their days exploring feelings, juggling their relationship with their daily lives. As I said earlier, no rush needed;they had all the time.

-Do you think Lulu will find her mother someday?-

Pandora glanced back at her after she stared at the ceiling for who knows how long.

-Here's hope you do- She simply answered back. Tentatively She brushed her hair from the other forehead.

They happily shared the cocoon of blankets, skin to skin;warmth developing them.

Lulu sighed, sinking deeper in the mattress;her head comfortably resting in the pillows. Pandora brought her closer, like she wanted them to merge.

-Don't give up. I believe things will end up well-

-Lulu knows...she's also not alone now-

-That's right. You have friends. You have me. I'll...make sure you accomplish your dream-

As she said that she turned the lamp off.

-Speaking of dreams. We should probably close our eyes and rest...-

Pandora closed hers. Lulu followed soon after;her dragon wings embraced Pandora's body, pulling her even closer.

-Sweet dreams...-

-You too...-

After minutes they both fell in a peaceful slumber.

Warm rays of light entered their shared room. Lulu's eyes were hit by the light. She made sure her wings were still covering Pandora, so she could rest a while more.The dragon girl looked at her partner in her "dragon cocoon."She smiled softly, rubbing the skin of her cheeks affectionately.

She waited some more;the sun rising up, warming up and illuminating the room further.

-Lulu thinks it is time to wake up-

She whispered gently. Pandora scrunched her nose. Lulu insisted;her hands wandered on the skin of her body, then pressed her lips against her in a render way. Not happy she peppered Pandora's exposed neck, making her squirm and giggle.

-Ok ok. I'll get up-

She rubbed her eyes tiredly -Already up for mischief- She ruffled Lulu's hair.

-Let's go have breakfast. I'll try to cook for you-

Lulu lifted her head immediately;a bashful smile appeared on her face -Lulu appreciates-

Before they could leave the warm bed they spent some more time under the blankets, sharing tender touches and kisses. Nothing was better than starting the day with the person you love.

[Extra little sketch as a thanks]

[lady--lioness]

"I'd like to go home," said Pallas absently one morning.

"What's stopping you?" Alda replied.

"The sea... The war... Lots of things," Pallas replied, her head downcast.

"Well, if you were at home, what would you like to do there?" Alda tried to cheer up the poor new girl.

"I'd like to..." Pallas bit her tongue. There were so many things she wanted to do, but she was afraid of giving herself away. She thought for a bit, searching her mind for more mundane things. "I'd like to smell the roses and walk along the beach."

"I want a nice cake," said Hannah, passing by. "With nice ingredients, curdled milk, currants, pure chocolate. These are things you can't find anymore."

"Don't talk to me about food, Hannah," this time it was her sister, Danielle. "That's what I'd want, a nice banquet in a nice restaurant, a really fancy one, with velvet curtains and handsome waiters."

"Handsome waiters?"

"We're talking about dreams and hopes, aren't we?"

"Oh," Ilse joined in. "I want a wedding with all my friends, and white flowers, lilies and roses, to serve chocolates with wine, and to wear a satin dress with lace, with pleats here, and here... Oh, how expensive everything is."

"You wouldn't suffer so much if you were just going to get married and that's it," said Estefanía, leaning against the door frame. "Everything else is superficial."

"I know. Actually, I'd settle for a small house, with all its things. But that's expensive too."

"I'm not contradicting you there," said Estefanía. "I want my father to get out of jail. But since that won't happen for a few more years, I'll settle for him being well, and with more space for flower pots. And for all the bugs to die."

"I don't want to tell you who I want to die," said Roswita, with a twisted face. "That idiot my family wanted me to marry wouldn't let me go out. Be a housewife and rot away within four walls, ha! I want my beautiful beauty salon and do all the fancy ladies' hair. And even if they aren't, make them look like they're rich."

"And you'll have it, for sure," said Olesya. "I want a bath by myself. In a huge tub, with hot water, perfumes, and foam, as long as I want. By candlelight. And someone playing the harp."

"You can ask Bert to play the accordion while you scrub in the tub," said Alda, with a mocking smile. "Oh no, impossible. Bert can't fit into that pandemonium."

They all burst out laughing.

"Ah, yes, this is what I want. A public that laughs, and cries, and gets excited about what I do. How wonderful."

"I like the way you recite," Elise appeared carrying a basket of freshly ironed sheets. "Someday I'll be able to say that I know the great Alda, international actress."

"You're a sweetheart, Elise," Alda took the basket. "And you always work like an ant."

"Well, I'd like to spend a day just lying down and listening to the birds through the window, without so much work to do," Elise blushed. "But I'm grateful for what I have. I don't want anything else in my life. If my mother were here, I wouldn't need anything else at all."

Paprika jumped between the women, and Melina appeared.

"Paprikaaaa... Mommy has food for you..."

"Melina wants her cat to stop stealing her things, right, Melina?"

"As long as it doesn't steal my money, the rest is replaceable, although I'd prefer things to last forever. That way I wouldn't have to spend on myself, and I could have a dog or maybe some farm animal."

"Oh no, no cows in here. There's no room left," Rosaespina came in yawning. "What are you talking about?"

"Dreams and hopes," said Pallas.

"My hope is a veeeery long dream," she said. "24 hours of sleep all in a row. In a warm, soft bed with fresh sheets, like the ones in that basket."

"What are you all doing here? We have to get ready for the opening soon." Giustizia suddenly came in, startling the women of the house.

"Hey Giustizia, what would you like to have? Do you have any dreams?"

Giustizia looked at the floor for a moment, then looked up.

"I dream that you are all well and that your hopes are fulfilled."

The women of the house looked at Giustizia with great tenderness. Elise threw herself at her, and they all wanted to follow her.

"Okay, okay, let's go, there is much to do and it's almost evening..."

Pallas smiled. Returning home is a beautiful dream, but finding it in other places is a hope that is not unattainable.

[calliesinn]

I may have gotten you hopes up a little bit erroneously there, I’m actually hiding out at the far edges of CST land closest to MST, but am forever dreaming of an excuse to relocate closer to some mountains. Marriage sounds like a pretty good one to me though.

I cant tell you how much I’ve daydreamed of that reality. Wrapped around your finger, existing for your pleasure, worshiping you and aching for you continually. I can only imagine how fun it would be to be your cute little house husband doing my little work from home job, making money to buy you pretty things you wear on dates with other men, while I spend the rest of my time cooking and cleaning for you.

And now you’re absolutely making me blush, I work hard to be the pretty little bisexual twink of peoples dreams. But god I am so curious to hear more about this ex-boyfriend.

I would never dream of denying you my forgiveness, especially when the ‘darlings’ and ‘my loves’ are making me melt over here. Maybe someday we’ll get lucky enough we’ll have our own little cucks begging to send you enough money so you dont have to work

i couldn't agree with you more. lets get married right here in the rockies (; is that close enough for you my dear? i actually already have a photographer, too. i'll be sure to have her sneak some photos of my ex and i in the woods together right after we exchange our vows.

oh and what a good little house husband you'd be. which is exactly why i'd spoil you rotten, too. every birthday, every anniversary, every holiday, you'd have a box to unwrap that is the same size every time and you know exactly what it is. the extra key to your cage, a timer, and usb drive with a new video added to it. you know the drill, you have 30 minutes from the time you open that box to unlock your perfect little cock, plug the usb drive in, watch, stroke, and cum. sometimes i'm a wicked little thing and love to give this present to you at a dinner with our family and friends just to see if you'll excuse yourself, so frantic and desperate to find something to play the usb on, to be able to cum. sometimes you succeed, sometimes you don't. regardless you're still always sooo grateful that i allowed you the opportunity, like the good little cuck that you are.

you're the pretty little bisexual twink of my dreams baby. he's military, very tall, rugged build, and has the best cock i've ever had. he actually wouldn't let me ride him for the longest time because he's so long and so thick he didn't want me to hurt myself but trust me, that didn't last long. the positions he would put me in was crazy. i remember his hands, his big strong hands, grabbing my chin, gripping around my neck, lifting me up so easily. he'd toss me around like a rag doll and i loved every second of it.

aw, are you melting for me cheri? i love when you melt for me, darling. that would be such a beautiful life. but i do want to say thank you, genuinely, for your send and note yesterday. that made me light up for the first time in days and is a big reason i'm back. so thank you, Mr. Cuck, sincerely for adoring me the way you do.

[blucheezecakestories]

Just a Little Bit Longer. (Jooyeon Short)

It's almost the end of highschool.

I haven't thought too much about anything yet, since I had plans to get to Psychology, but... well, something in me didn't want to. Part of me wanted to try something else. Such is the curse of time.

After the hectic day, I just realized... Well, I only have about a month left for school. I just need to fix up everything and get things done with graduation and then... And then follow the flow of time. That's when I realize how much time had passed, leaving only me in the classroom- ah. A soft tap on my head happened to come by. As I look around, no was was around, but a ball of crumpled paper rested on the floor. I just... need some more time to re- another thud, this time, I could see the paper fall to the floor. God, I know who it is; he's responsible for some of my headaches.

"I swear, Jooyeon," I started in a rather loud and clear voice, "One more and I'll haunt you in your dreams."

"I didn't throw that paper! It was always there!" A disembodied voice would reply, leaging me with a biger headache than just moments ago. "Just- come out now. I know you're lying, anyway."

Come out he did, as he walks into the room with a relieved but mischievous grin. His hair would fall right on his nape, brown hair indicating that he dyed it again. "Always breaking the rules, huh, Jooyeon?" I greeted with one of my eyebrows raised. He laughs, immediately sitting down next to me. I could feel his black eyes stare at me while I pack my things up. The bright orange lighting that the sunset provides light for me to see what I was doing. "Shut up, It's almost the end of our high school anyway! Plus you always said you think dyeing my hair looks cool." He said with a lighthearted tone.

"I said that?" I asked. He shifts his position as if flabbergasted that I seem to forget that statement.

"Now of course you did, Miss Serious! Geez, it's not like it's been that long since we met each other." It seems that we both have the same ideas in our head, since Jooyeon paused after saying that.

"Hey."

"Hey what, Jooyeon?"

"Remember the first time we met?"

"That you moved here with your parents and I happened to be your neighbor?"

Jooyeon scoffed and leaned forward. "We were about 10 years old, too. You're... Very boyish back then, huh?"

"Hey, at least I was trying to drive those kids who were bullying you back then." I reply. Jooyeon, now that I remember, was a scaredy cat back then. Now... Well, at least he changed for the better. "And by the way, I heard you want to pursue that music dream of yours?"

One mention of music, as I suspected, gave that spark of eagerness to the boy. "Yeah, of course! Once I graduate, I'll see if I can audition and get into a band someday. I promise you, once I become famous, I'll make sure you always get the VIP ticket in my band's concerts!"

His eagerness, it broke my heart. Jooyeon, I knew him the longest. I do get dragged into trouble he brews every now and then either bc he is bored or is curious. He... Well, I've seen him get popular with the girls, too. Plus, we always hang out here, after school. It's become our way of bonding and telling each other all we could tall throughout those years. But with all that bond we built throughout those years, he feels like a stranger again.

"I'm proud of you, you know that right?"

"Mhm! And you..." He said, realizing the amount of time we both could spend today, after 5 months of avoiding communication with each other. "You keep studying hard, right?" He said and then stood up. He paces back and forth as if wanting to give me a speech. "I... You said you wanted to study hard, And so... you stopped hanging out with me. I mean, I get it. I hope you get into that dream college soon. Oh, how about this, we can set up a meeting place when we have the time! Maybe then we can still keep hanging out like this, for as long as we need to!"

That does it. Hearing him say all that, my heart sank. I knew why. He should know why. I took out something from my bag, an envelope of sorts. I stare at his curious eyes, handing it over to him. He then silently opens it, the tension covered by the sounds of rustling paper. I'd sigh the moment he started to look so defeated. "... You're accepted to... Stanford?" He said, looking up to me.

His forced smile tells me he wants to be optimistic about all of this news. I can't stand it, the months of radio silence between us only for him to come again today, but I had to basically tell him I'll be leaving for good. "That's great news! You can always come back here to visit your parents-"

"My parents... They decided to move there with me. I... I'm afraid I won't be able to see you."

"What?..." He mentioned, his smile fading as he approached me. "There must be a way. I could go with you when I'm out for a concert-"

"But then it's going to be years, Jooyeon!"

"You don't understand-"

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" I protested, my emotions getting the better of me as Jooyeon's eyes start turning glossy. "Mom and Dad wants the best of me and I try but they never seem to consider how much I'm just happy to be here! I just... I wanted to try and find ways to stay here but I can't. I can't- see you anymore-"

"Don't say that!" Jooyeon outbursts as well, his lips quivering. All those memories... It's rushing through my mind. I just... I don't want to ever have him disappear. "Nabi, don't say that, please... when we stopped talking, I was just- so scared because- you're the only one who listened to me for who I am... And not seeing you anymore... I don't want that to happen. Nabi... I don't want you to go..."

His tears run freely like a stream, I... never saw him cry, but my heart broke seeing this. I didn't know what to do... so I just had to hold him close with an embrace. The warmth but also the tense atmosphere made me cry as well.

When all of it died down, I finally let him go, as we sit beside each other. The orange light of the sunset starts to dim, but... Jooyeon and I have the unspoken feeling of not wanting to go. Just remembering all those memories, the mistake of distancing myself from him... All of it, I just hope we stay a little bit longer.

"Nabi..." He croaked out.

"What?"

"I'm scared."

"About what?"

"I don't know."

I sighed as I turn to face him.

"Just tell me. I can stay here a little longer."

"I... Nabi."

"What is it?"

"I just... I have feelings you know?"

Hearing that, my eyes widen. "Feelings? For who?"

"... You know who. I just... don't want to let go of her like that."

One moment passed, and another. I let him process what he just said, while I do the same. We stared into each other, as if trying to understand what he meant, but this unspoken feelings, we both just know what it is. As the classroom dims, we let ourselves stay a little bit longer, as we let ourselves draw closer and meet lips to lips.

[predoom]

ohoneohone

Friday, November 11th, 2005 12:35 pm i won't tell a soul if you dont want me to. hearts between our knees sticking to summer sheets. Saturday, November 5th, 2005 4:59 pm keep me fast the way he runs his mouth its a wonder that i havent caught a flight home just for a second alone the way he runs my mouth makes me hate you just as much as him thank god i spend most of the daylight dreaming in wine colored beads the sun never caught me right when i was little i splash water on my face in sinks in green rooms like pinching yourself or trying to wash the miles off down a dark hotel hallway the finger prints in pink and blue like skin and veins i try to jump from the doorway to the bed so i dont leave footprints so i dont disturb the carpet like sand you want shyer eyes you want bigger "im sorry"s and regrets for things that i.Yo.u. did you want survivors in the wreckage you want flashlights in the cave you want second chances for second chances i loved everything about you that hurts your scars, your flaws, your not so subtle attempts at wit and irony that always fell a bit short and felt forced your insincerity, your imitation that you passed off as exploration your morning smile 3 year stand (off) her breathing is shallow she shakes whenever i get near- i guess its an occupational hazard its okay we dont have to talk. youre just a body. heaven sent and percoset. even though we're fading fast.... im sorry "pretty"- you were just a canary in a coal mine. Tuesday, November 1st, 2005 7:57 pm there are many things that i would like to say to you but i don't know how im not even too sure what goes on, especially in my own head. one second its one way and the next its another. i have a funny way of showing i care. but i do. i have to say it- halloween wasn't the same this year with out you. i i had the best time ever in southern california. but it wasn't really halloween with out you. and new years won't either. my calls go out today but they'renot picked up. i get what i get. i got some friends who are wearing their egos on their sleeves. its ok. i'll play dumb. you are a shadow of who you once were. "can we start agains" ive had my share. for the past month my mood has been however our phone calls ended. it felt like i was dying inside when i hung up the phone on you. but i have to make a point. you can only act like dirt for so long before you become it. but theres nobody like me and you. i feel like veins and ligatures when you aren't around. and breathing in isnt the same when you're not breathing out. percoset revolutionary. "look mom, no breathing". fucking fading. fucked up, but not cool fucked up. maybe we rip the map in half and someday we meet up in the middle. by accident or just because. everything and everyone ends up faced down on the floor in the end.

you are my wonderwall. Wednesday, October 26th, 2005 6:51 pm my mom said 'make sure you go to sleep smiling tonight baby cause you'll wake up feeling better" i just re-read everything you wrote over the past two months.

i miss my friends.

there is life after this. i promise myself. Tuesday, October 25th, 2005 10:51 pm everything they say about us is true im watching scary movies like every afternoon. i got some new slipper and pants. i look ridiculous. dreamboat. the inside of my head is always changing. even right this second. when i go back over all the details it makes me so glad im not in that town anymore. all of a sudden we're always in the crosshairs. it kinda feels normal now. we used to goof around about killing ourselves off. but sometimes it wasn't a joke. i can't sleep when the bus isn't moving. went to the fender offices today, they are gonna make me some basses. pretty exciting. the only thing ive ever learned is that its pretty easy to say "i love you" its alot harder to mean it. my friends are dropping like flies. everyone looks good when they are the one with their fingers on the keyboards. history is written by the conquerer. we're headlining an amphitheater tommorrow. thats retarded. fistfightking. makeoutqueen. past midnights. get amazed.

Current Music: 2sweet Sunday, October 23rd, 2005 9:42 am you see that kid... its not me, its you. blow out the candles on caring. encounters yesterday: went to paul walls jewelry shop. pretty insane. then when we played jared leto came over and watched. radio shows are wack. encounters today: the gold medal gymnast from the 2004 olympics is coming to hang out with me. pretty insane. why would you ever want to meet a boy like me. i am boring. you make it easier to make the decisions that i do. i turned off the switch that cares. i watch lots of movies and take lots of naps. cause i am a baby. i am gonna be in the academy video for black mamba. i can't tell you how excited that makes me. Wednesday, October 19th, 2005 11:48 pm ill be on time for that, i cant think of a line that rhymes with that blue looks better than jealousy. im awake but not up. you know what i mean. blew the speakers out like a candle. drowned out my sorrows in a wet dream. i miss you but only in flashing moments. new stuff over at buzznet. people been asking about the prices. honestly we charge what it costs us to make. alot of the stuff lately has been cut and sew or requires hand stitching which is expensive. so we try to keep the stuff really limited, so that it stays special. the bags sold out in a day. we won't be making anymore of that particular bag. but we will be making more limited bags and other items. Tuesday, October 18th, 2005 4:48 pm i, peter lewis kingston wentz, solemnly swear... im trying to figure it out. my head moves way faster than my mouth. i went to a party at chris from nsnyc's house for a party. it was about as good/bad as you would think. except dirty was there. so factor that one in. always up or down, never down and out.

the new nightmare of you record is fantastic. it makes me think of winters at home. love it or leave me. Sunday, October 16th, 2005 12:45 pm baby, im just bad news i don't know if it feels real been watching halloween movies lately to get me in the mood taking lots of naps its easier this way she wont ever love you the way she loves me youre not pretty enough and you dont make her heart beat been hiding messages in morse code and anagrams banging my wrist against the edge of the keyboard until it turns black and blue we're all settling all the time panic! at the disco makes me want to start this all over again coversations with you make me want it to never have begun at all nick plan and william beckett are on the list in one form or another always if you dont have your friends than you dont got shit and my friends are gold halloween is gonna be the best this year i think ive never been in california on halloween- it once was, but it hasnt been for a really long time spent most of the morning on the phone with my mommy cause she can always slow my breathing down you can get used to anything after a while even this, pete pretty boys for secret girls later skater Wednesday, October 12th, 2005 12:02 pm ill make you shake so hard you might not make it through the night new york city is fucking insane. get me. bruisa. fall makes me remember and want love.

okay okay cause i should:

1. you say crazy shit in your sleep, like about us living in old milwaukee. 2. right this second "wonderwall" sometimes star wars. 3. i dunno cherry coke flavored. 4. sugar tail, freckles in your eyes, basement windows, braces 5. new years on the windowsill. 6. uh kind of in a weird way the retriever head on the beagle body. just the nicest dog ever. 7. that one bane lyric, im pretty sure its a question. but mostly lately- what happened to my best friend?

nick york city. the clan party last night was rightious. im kinda going other places. feeling it. quit sleeping on it cause im the life. from the back of my legs to the back of my neck- im so glad there are people out there who won't let me fall off the face of the planet.

young.

panic at the disco at the knitting factory in new york tonight- 5pm. Tuesday, October 11th, 2005 12:57 am you remind me of this one movie. it makes me smile. but not with my mouth and way too many teeth. but with my eyes. trouble loves me. but you do way more. im dreaming on highway lines and phone hang-ups. just happy to be me. for one second.

i got a sweet vest and some teddy bear shoes. im good for cuddling. youre gonna have to trust me on that one.

[getitfrenchship]

Hello, friends! Hope you're all doing well. In fact, I'd like to know what you're all up to so I can reconnect with friends again. What things are you watching/playing/doing now? Any new things in life you'd like to discuss?

Below the cut I'll say what I've been up to!

Just got back from my local con today and while I did spend a lot on game collecting + VA stuff, I'm glad I went. Thankfully I got paid Friday (though that means I'll have to wait to get paid again in 2 weeks) and my financial situation isn't dire. It's kinda like when you go to Disneyland and get caught up in the spectacle of things. Oh yeah, an IRL friend from high school helped me with a lot of the VA stuff since she had a VIP pass & could skip long lines. (On that note FUCK F//UNKO SCALPERS FOR HOGGING LINES AND MAKING ME WAIT 2 HOURS FOR ONE VA AAAAAAAAAA)

Thankfully, no insurance adjuster lady to drive me up the wall this past month at work. A few eh client encounters but overall it's been way more pleasant than it was a few months ago. ...Might still need to figure out vacation time just so I can take a longer break (and maybe find a government job if I'm able to find something so I have guaranteed holidays).

That being said, S//aimon's series is starting to see a spike of discourse and one of the servers I'm in keeps talking about it. It's making me feel bad as a result. Thankfully, none of the people in it are starting the discourse, but they tend to go "getaloadofthisguy" a lot. Along with usual self ship discourse that I see on my dash (that again thankfully neither friends nor I directly participate in), it kinda just drains me.

Seasonal anime I'm watching are Detergent (hopefully one of Shitsui's big scenes will happen next week; they took a break this week), Und//ead Mur//der Far//ce, Hel//ck (though I'm admittedly not really paying attention to this one), Happy Marriage, J J K season 2 (i am not ready for this arc AAAAAAAAA), and Z//om 100. When there isn't a seasonal anime for me to watch at work, there's Sai//ki K (I think watching Bla//ck Lag//oon kinda helped make me more bitter at work, but I'm feeling better now that I'm watching Sai//ki). Oh, I might check out OPLA since I hear it's an actual good adaptation. Aaaand F//ionna and C//ake too! God, I went "kindred spriits" with Simon's episode

Currently I'm playing Se//a of St//ars and I really like how it looks & plays so far! (Of course, I loved Chr//ono Trig//ger, so the gameplay feels right at home). I wooould continue Gh//ost Tri//ck, but I'm at a stealth section and like I expected, I'm looking up a lot of the puzzle solutions online instead of figuring it out for myself. Curse you, time limits!!! (And for Bom//b R//ush, I feel like I need to play with music, but I keep forgetting to bring my wired headphones. Bluetooth is for my phone mainly due to personal preference). I also watched the endings for OT2 and AUGH I LOVE THIS GAME SO MUCH!!!

Oh, a new manga I found called "Inv//isible Man & his soon to be bride" is cute so far.

someday i will find balam merch. somedaaaay

I might do a separate post showing my current ideas for S/I's/OCs, but hhhh I'm hesitant. Right now I just know for a P3 OC he takes inspiration from "The Stranger"

boy howdy i sure hope bluesky finally makes my account or i can get an invite because i really want tweetor to die. ...though i'd miss posting switch screenshots directly

[everythingsinred]

Do you think that even after dating Mikan for a while Natsume would still being jealous?

Hi hi hi, Anon!

So this is a bit complex and I'm sure there's various opinions on this, but I'll just stick to my own understanding of his character for this.

To start with, Oxford has a couple definitions of jealousy.

feeling or showing envy of someone or their achievements and advantages. feeling or showing suspicion of someone's unfaithfulness in a relationship. fiercely protective or vigilant of one's rights or possessions.

Essentially, jealousy is a normal emotion (notice here that the above definitions use the word "feeling") but it's born of insecurity. If you think back on any TV shows or movies where jealousy plays a major role, the jealous person is usually feeling insecure for whatever reason. Sometimes it's justified and sometimes it's not. Let's discuss this a bit.

One: The first definition describes envy of achievements and advantages. You might say this is how Natsume is jealous for most of the manga before he and Mikan actually get together. I wrote a very long series of essays detailing this, but his jealousy is mainly about being able to pursue affection or a relationship. He's jealous of Tsubasa for being able to hug Mikan, openly or otherwise. He's jealous of Tono for being touchy-feely, because he isn't allowed to be. He's convinced any affection toward her would hurt her, so he can't even try it.

That's an advantage Tsubasa and other boys have that Natsume doesn't; it crops up every now and then with his humorous aggression toward Tsubasa and Tono and his moody stares whenever Ruka and Mikan have a moment. His circumstances make it so hugging or spending too much with Mikan is not a possibility and he's jealous of others for not having to worry about that.

You see a few times in the manga when he is less constrained and acts a lot more familiar with her; whenever he backs off it's because he has no choice. He becomes less jealous during those moments, because if he has the same opportunities he can only blame himself if things don't go his way. Granted, I said "less jealous", not "not jealous at all" because Natsume's martyr complex doesn't stop him from wanting what he wants, even if he won't admit it. He wants to love Mikan openly and also to be loved by her. Thus, jealousy would be two-fold, and if either of those desires is challenged (and they are, frequently) then he gets jealous. Yes, he puts his wants aside often, but that doesn't mean they don't exist or influence his emotions.

I don't think Natsume in a happy relationship would feel that as much. You might bring up his fourth alice shape as a reason why he might feel insecure, and I'd give you that if I wasn't a hundred feet deep in delusion, since I believe the fourth shape would become a nonissue eventually. He can hold her hand or hug her or kiss her whenever he wants, and actually has more justification to do so than anybody else.

That brings us to two: The second definition is about suspecting infidelity. I think I talked about this the most in my essay about Natsume's feelings during the Rapunzel Arc, but Natsume is deeply self-loathing. He doesn't view himself as valuable because of who he is and he doesn't entirely buy that Mikan really loves him. He thinks her love is weaker than his, maybe fleeting. She is affection, but her affections are definitely not invincible. She could hate him someday, and he could never hate her back.

"You are mine."

If Natsume thinks Mikan doesn't love him as much as he loves her, then it's completely possible that he might get insecure about her feelings. I don't think Mikan would cheat, but the fear that maybe he's not as interesting, or that her feelings have passed onto somebody else are still on the table. I think Natsume might struggle with believing that Mikan chose him and doesn't have feelings for anybody else.

This is where independent thinking must come into play. To be entirely honest, if Tachibana Higuchi is at all to be listened to, then I think Natsume would be within his rights to be jealous under this second definition. Our dear mangaka has made jokes to the effect that Natsume shouldn't be too comfortable, that he hasn't "won" yet, that Ruka or Hotaru still have a shot. That's not even mentioning the atrocious final chapter, where Mikan apparently only cares about Hotaru and doesn't mind telling every single person that came to see her that Hotaru is number one and the others don't even place (OOC and disgusting behavior, TBH).

I think that's all ridiculous and the final chapters are so bad I ignore them. The only part of the Memorial Book I care about is the Red Riding Hood comic and the HotaRuka picture. I ignore Higuchi Tachibana's post canon ideas entirely.

FIRST: Natsume absolutely should be comfortable in a monogamous romantic relationship with Mikan! He should not be nervous and watching over his shoulder all the time! That's so ridiculous, that he shouldn't trust his girlfriend not to be faithful to him. It's insulting to their relationship and to Mikan, especially, that there's a chance Mikan would change her mind all of a sudden.

SECOND: Natsume did not win. He was chosen. Love isn't a game. I'd argue it's hardly even a feeling. It's a choice. There's a reason married couples go to counseling to work on their relationship when their feelings weaken; the feelings are an important part of a bond, but they're not the only part. Otherwise, what is stopping every dissatisfied person out there from leaving their partner to find a new and exciting stomach full of butterflies and electricity? You choose to work on the relationship because you choose that person, good and bad (to an extent, of course), and there shouldn't be anything fleeting or hesitant about that.

Mikan chose Natsume. She loves him, yes, but she also chose him. She chose to kiss him, to give him her heart via alice stone and also metaphorically. She chose to devote herself to him, and that's not the same as Natsume winning some competition. That was something only Mikan could decide, and she did. If we have any trust in Mikan, and we should, then we should disregard Higuchi Tachibana's attempt to be edgy and believe that Natsume should not be worried about her leaving him for anybody else.

THIRD: Love, in its feeling form, doesn't have some maximum capacity, and as a result it should not be that simple to state who you love the most (but also common courtesy should keep you from announcing that information out loud to a group of people who care about you for no real reason, especially when said top person isn't even there). Hotaru is Mikan's best friend. Ruka is Mikan's trusted friend and ally. Natsume is her boyfriend. There's different types of love and those types are all important and valuable.

I don't think Mikan would be unfaithful. I don't think she'd leave Natsume or have an emotional affair, trying to suppress hidden feelings for somebody else while she placates Natsume. It's a nasty thing to accuse her of, and I don't care much for the Memorial Book for this reason. Mikan loves Natsume. She chose him. End of story.

But Natsume is insecure. He was brought back from the dead just to make Mikan happy, after all, so he has no reason to believe in his own value, still, even at the manga's close. I think they'd both have to work on his insecurity to completely eliminate his feeling of not being enough for her. She'd have to validate him, but I'm sure she's up for it, because it doesn't seem that difficult TBH. He's so beyond happy just being chosen, that if she just keeps at it (keeps choosing him and openly loving him), that it would help a lot with his work on himself.

To the final definition: Being protective or possessive. This one is the one that sounds most like what we see in Kageki. A Natsume who is dating Mikan, trusts Ruka with her, and can be as openly affectionate as he wants. There's no wanting for advantages, because he has more than anybody. No fearing infidelity, because he trusts his best friend and his girlfriend. But possessiveness? That we do see.

Natsume monopolizes Mikan's attention and I personally think that's great. He's being selfish, and y'all know that's what I love to see for him after he's put himself dead last his whole life. Natsume is the kind of boyfriend who wants to spend all his time with his girlfriend, even just sitting around doing nothing, because he's spent so much time not being able to. I don't really think that would ever go away.

But over time, as he becomes healthier, I don't think the first two definitions would apply at all. I don't think he'd want to switch places with anybody and he wouldn't be scared for his relationship. He'd maintain just the right amount of possessiveness. He does after all, keep going back to the "You're mine" thing, so it clearly means a lot that she is his girlfriend. He'd also love any possessiveness from her because being loved by her makes him happy.

I really didn't mean for this answer to be so long but turns out I have quite a lot of thoughts on the topic.

I guess the short of it is that yes, to an extent, I think he'd keep some of his jealousy around, but that it would become less and less about fearing infidelity or of not being good enough.

[ev-n-learning]

2023 year stats!!! Wow its been a year since ive shown u one of these... amazing

anyways not too much to say here i don't think! Although can you believe its been almost a year since i stopped learning ukrainian.... weird

something thats interesting to me is that i've spent more time on czech this past year than ukrainian the year previous... and just on duolingo, somehow?! There's no way I'm 2 months away from finishing the czech tree!!!

I suppose the courses could have been different lengths to start out with, but I do blame the redesign they did... I still don't like it, lol. (Other factors could be: czech has No Cyrillic so i cant read it as well)

As far as the other languages go — I really can't believe it was only this year I finished 50languages?! Year so long... but anyways, after that i will be honest with you: most of my active belarusian studying has been solely anki and (mostly) daily search of the wordle. The other most is People I Follow On Tumblr and tiktok (theres belarusians on there)

Russian is about the same as I've been doing. Slogging through 5,000 words of top 10,000 on memrise still. Probably about 2,500 of the way through. Probably at LEAST 2 more years of slog...

Maybe it doesn't serve much of a purpose, but i'd feel weird having the extra time. Like, no, i'm supposed to be Doing Something at 14:45,,, and, yknow, sometimes i encounter these words in the wild. (Not so much anymore though)

Doing my best to keep up with polygloss for russian, too! It's fun but I never know how to describe the images so a lot of matches get sent into the ether... oops 😅

As for marathi, well................................. nanowrimo happened. Is putting it shortly - actually, I started doing something else in november, and with that, languages, and nano... it was a lot! So I did not do much marathi in november specifically because of that. The rest of the year, well... hmmm. The less said the better?

Well, anyways, it's because of having to spend the same amount of energy almost on czech at the same time, *and* because of the Something Else i've been doing. So - I do want to learn it! Spending time on marathi would be great, actually! I am just Busy. And thus it has been relegated to anki only for the better part of the year if i remember right 😔 someday...

Sidenote, at the rate I'm typing this will be posted after midnight..... well, i wanted to put it out there yesterday night, but i couldn't decide what to say, lol. January 2nd is still New of new years, right??

To be honest, I haven't really thought about any language plans for this year... i know russian and belarusian well enough to read posts & such, and I have the mental fortitude to read books i understand maybe 25% of, but listening and talking I'd say are probably where I need the most improvement. (Writing, well... I'll get back to you once i can learn grammar effectively). With everything as it is now, I'm not sure there's much to be done about that, but maybe I'll figure something out here sooner or later... maybe.

I know I want to finish the czech tree on duolingo, and then I'll pick another language from my duo list and the cycle shall begin anew... and then in 12 years either duo will be dead or i will not wish to learn languages any more (a scary thought). OR i will speedrun every language on my list to the best of my ability and then never touch duo again (no streak, no badges... i think monthly badges are like the Only duo thing that actually works on me because i Need To Collect. ah, fomo...)

As for marathi, if I can manage to pull it out of hibernation alongside all that duolingo nonsense, then by god i'll do it 🫡 if i learned* one language by being exceedingly slow at it I can do it again!!

*referring to russian so perhaps its not accurate to say "learned" still but my point stands

...

Anyways yeah!!! Idk how to end this so з новым годам (late) to u all and good luck & wishes for the new year <3 things may never be perfect but at least i can hope they will be better 👍 🎉🎉🎉

[areseebee]

Hi!! Just reread all of Maybe Someday - 😍😍 It is SO amazing and completely canon in my mind! Cannot wait for the rest of Someday!

I love the bisexual James HC and love to see it here too, and I know it won't be a focus of the fic, but I have been wondering - there is no way James "I support gay people even though I am not actually gay myself" Maguire didn't have a huge-ass crisis, right 😂? Did you have any thoughts on what that might've been like for James?

thank you!! 🥰 also thank you for this ask, i didn't realize how much my brain would light up to get asked questions about the story itself and my headcanons! here is my very long, winding, should-have-been-more-succinct answer to this:

james being bi was mostly something i sort of kept to myself as my hc of choice from the minute i wrote in smoke break chapter 1 about james having tried menthols before. it was the most minor detail, but, while michelle is convinced he tried the methols because of a girl, i chose from erin's POV to have her always think about a possible partner of james in terms of "someone" or "them." because, in truth, in my head, james did try menthols because of a crush at school, but it wasn't because of a girl (and he really doesn't want to talk about it because 1. it's just a crush and 2. he's not sure how he feels about having this crush).

it wasn't until i was chatting with @derrygirlstrash one day about where the story could go after smoke break that she was like "so, to me, james is bi" and it was the loveliest thing in the world for me to be able to say "me too!" that's when i decided to make it officially a part of how i write james.

i read james's sexuality through my own lens of experience - for a while, he's not really sure how he identifies, he's not really sure if his friendship with this crush with the menthols is because he hasn't really been friends with a lad for a long time because all his closest friends are girls, or if because he just admires and respects him, or if it's because he really likes this guy - all he knows is that he wants to be noticed by him, wants to spend time with him, goes out of his way to put himself in his crush's path. ultimately, however, it is something he sort of puts away in a box - he goes to derry for the summer and things happen with erin, and then goes back to london and meets his post-smoke break gf, faye. maybe he had a growing awareness of his sexuality, but it sort of took a back seat because he was with partners who he loved so it didn't really matter that much what he identified as. it's sort of a "i'll think about this later" sort of thing.

i like to think that him being so close to clare and observing her get more comfortable in her identity softened the "realization" of it all. he knew he had people around him that would be accepting, he knew it wasn't some end-of-the-entire-world kind of thing, and he just organically gets more comfortable with himself as he gets older. also - it probably helped that faye is bi, too, as hinted with mentions of with her and clare dating later on during the someday timeline. it just becomes increasingly a part of his ecosystem during the formative years of his life.

my experience is, of course, not everyone's experience. but i vibe with the part of me that figured it out over time without it being much of a struggle with my identity, that it was something that felt like welcoming a new color to my own identity that i hadn't seen in myself before, that also felt like it was about the individual i cared about/crushed on, rather than their gender identity. so that's the experience i choose to imagine for james too.

ultimately, to me, it doesn't really become a thing for james until he meets someone who sort of makes it a thing: miles, who he meets on a set of a film shoot, and who is disturbingly handsome - patrick swayze/john stamos lovechild handsome; the perfect 90s heartthrob, basically.

incidentally, i wrote a short little thing (very unedited) about the first time miles and james meet, which i am happy to share here. i gave him some bi panic, as a treat. but it’s because miles is absurdly hot, not because james is necessarily fighting against or even all that surprised by the attraction. i am not sure if it will show up anywhere "officially" in the future, so here it is now:

“Has anyone ever told you that you look like Patrick Swayze?”

Miles paused before a slow grin came over his face. James swallowed, his mouth feeling very suddenly dry. “Flattery will get you everywhere, mate,” he said, before turning back to his sound board.

“Not trying to flatter, just…wondered if anyone had said. Cause – Patrick Swayze’s great. And you definitely look like him.”

Miles glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, his smirk remaining firmly in place. “Big fan then? What’s your favourite Swayze film?”

“Er – Ghost. I guess.”

“Classic,” Miles answered. “Want to know mine?”

“Sure,” James shrugged, stuffing his hands in his jean pockets just to have something to do with them.

“Dirty Dancing,” Mile said with a wink. James immediately felt hot all over.

He cleared his throat and tried to sound nonchalant. “That’s…good choice,” he said. Miles nodded, and continued connecting cables. “‘I carried a watermelon,’” James offered.

Miles’s hands had been moving quickly, setting up for the day’s shoot, but they stopped as he glanced questioningly at James, “What?”

“Oh. Er,” James started, feeling exceedingly stupid. “It’s what Baby says. When she first meets him.”

“Oh. Right,” Mile said, chuckling, and turning back to his work. “Good memory.”

“I can’t help it. The lines just sort of stick.”

“And see, my brain’s just like a sieve. Goes right through. Maybe I need another watch sometime soon. You can tell me when all the good lines are coming up,” Miles said, another smirking glance sent James’s way.

“Oh. Yeah. Maybe.” James’s cheeks felt very hot. “Well…I should go. Do my…job. Or whatever.”

“Sounds good, mate,” Miles chuckled again. “See you around. And – if you ever want to get lifted like that, well…you know where to find me.”

“Um. Ok,” James said, knowing for certain now that he must look like a tomato. He turned exactly 180 degrees and walked for too long in that direction. It was only when he ended up on the outskirts of the set by the makeup trailer that he realized he’d gone exactly the wrong way. He had to call Clare.

[saiyomiya]

April 2024 Plans

March was not the most productive but like, it's fine.

I was planning on reading Tsukihime, right? Well, the monotonous, heavy loop music really killed my motivation real fast. It just takes way, way too long to read and the music loop was starting to drive me insane. I might try it again when the remake is out on PC.

So, I ended up buying Dai Gyakuten Saiban on sale and started trudging through it slowly. I haven't played it that much since I got it, but am starting my first trial (I started at 1-4 since that's where I was at on the Switch version before I stopped).

I'm not sure when I'll play it more? It takes so much mental energy to, so we'll see when the mood strikes me next... I definitely like it a lot, so I'll play it more, most likely this month.

As for the JP I have done for the latter half of March, I've been playing Shinymas more due to the goodies we're getting due to the anniversary.

It's a much, much easier read than DGS because the girls don't tend to talk about anything complicated or with heavy jargon, so it's a real self-esteem lifter. I highly recommend checking out slice of life stuff if you're studying Japanese. It'll go down a lot faster. Of course, some groups talk about more complicated things than others (I'm looking at Alstroemeria and Shhis for this, lol).

I don't really have goals when it comes to reading Shiny Colors other than to just... read it. I guess I'd like to read all the Shhis events (easy, since they have so few of them) and also Alstroemeria (harder, even though the content is easier--there's a lot of them). I finally started playing TFD so getting through every unit would probably be a good idea too.

Last month, I managed to read Mamiya and wrote a lengthy review on it. I really liked it, but I read it in English since I just wanted to read something in English for once. The translation was really good and a welcome break from the JP grinding I was doing for most of the month.

I still haven't finished Relink. I keep thinking I should, but I just haven't had the motivation to? Surely I'll get back to it someday, and I don't really regret buying it on release, but next time I'll wait before buying a game as expensive as that.

The last thing I mentioned on my list was to make keychains, and I got them done and they arrived! I think they ended up pretty cute, but Raqio ended up a little washed out, and I'm not sure how to fix it. Fuck printing blues, man...

I'm thinking of seeing if there's interest for purchasing these, but I'm kinda lazy about making a post so we'll just keep kicking that can down the road...

April 2024

This month, I'd obviously like to read more JP, such as the aforementioned Shiny Colors. I'd also like to spend some time reading Granblue stories in JP, which I've meant to for a while (I should make a list of ones I'd like to read). And of course, play more DGS.

When it comes to games, the No Name Yet event in Enstars is coming up and I have to play it. I have pretty much retired from Enstars, but I want to at least be back for such an important event for me and I have a dumb amount of resources for it so maybe I'll just max out the card and call it a day. I dunno. I know it's a lot easier to auto these days and it's not a Tour event, thankfully. I just have to keep an eye for it coming over.

Creatively, I'd finally like to make my Setsu plush, but I'm really lazy... everything is all set for the pattern, but I think I have performance anxiety for embroidering the face... We'll see how it goes.

Another thing I'd like to do is finally decorate my Tenka nui, which I kept putting off for months (I'm even staring at her on my desk rn). There's some really cute fan outfits that really make me excited to do it, and it frankly even shouldn't take that long to put blush on her and glue on some sparkles for her eyes so... I'm not sure why I haven't done it yet, lol

Also, Sekimeiya's anniversary is coming on May 6th and I'd like to have something drawn for it. So... yeah. And I guess finally finish up Ilsa maybe. Maybe...

I guess that's a lot of stuff I'd like to do, so better rise and grind... once again.

[astarab1aze]

Truth Serum + What makes you happiest about spending time with Maeve? [ Loux <3 ]

truth serum

"Wha' makes me happiest? She a breath o' fresh air typa girl, got a warm sorta vibe comin' off 'er, an' I do so lo' me a chiquita wit a sense o' adventure. Someone who can keep up wit m' bustin' ass t' get shit done, see th' sights, kick back an' enjoy e'erythin' 'is world's gotta offer - all th' fun, cute shit, yanno? An' she makes all 'ese cute faces when she's 'splorin' th' Valley or hittin' up the Crossin' wit me. Everythin's new t' her too, an' there ain't nothin' like seein' the joy an' wonder on a girl's face when ya take 'er someplace new ferda first time. When ya show 'er somethin' she ain't ne'er seen b'fore, gettin' t' be tha' first--"

It occurred to him he might be a little difficult to properly understand. Hmmm.

"What 'm sayin' is, really just about everythin'. Not sure if happy is the right word, exactly, buh s'not too far off. Guess ya could say I think she's fun, I always have a good time with her, and she's got 'is quiet sorta strength about 'er. I'unno, I jus' respect it. I always look forward t' spendin' time wit 'er, yanno? Helps she's easy on th' eyes, an' in a way tha' I'd say compliments m' own." He snickered. "Somethin' about 'er, somethin' nice, somethin' homey. Got a lotta thoughts, t' be honest, buh 'm not sure I can get 'em all out at once. I ain't the flowery type, I dunno how t' dress m' words up an' make 'em sound worth hearin'. I'unno how t' actually make a girl like 'er happy. Whether it takes a lot or a lil, whether 'ere's even anythin' I could do in th' first place. I mean, shee-it, t'ain't like I deserve any o' this anyway.

"She's cute, def wanna be a part o' her life, buh it'd be better fer us both iffin I dipped out. Better fer her, since she wouldn't 'ave a killer-slash-drug dealer on 'er hands. 'ere's a reason I ain't tell 'er about any o' tha' shit yet. S'better she don' know; A' least tha' way, someone'll think o' me an' not feel total disdain an' disgust fer me. Maybe not fer a minute, buh someday. I'unno, guess we'll see on tha' front, buh I ain't gonna get my hopes up an' I hope she don't either... I'd hate t' be th' one who took all she 'ad t' give an' shit all over it. No matter wha' I do, it'd be like doin' tha' anyway, right? Jus, dunno if I'll e'er be the typa guy fer 'er, typa guy tha' can, yanno, do anythin' meanin'ful ousside o' wha' 'm already doin'. Givin' m'self up in exchange fer m' family. Prolly th' least selfish I been in a while, when 'm wit her an' when 'm focusin' m' energy into tha'. 'ere ain't much else fer me.

"Buh fer 'er? Well, 'm tryna make sure she ain't got a damn thang t' worry about, yanno? S'all I think I'll be able t' do fer 'er. 'ventually, I'll give 'er some money so she ain't gotta worry about rent or anythin'. Give 'er all th' tools I got so she can stay safe an' healthy long after 'm gone. Maybe tha's a lil defeatist, buh cain't hurt to cover all m' bases, right? Long as she's safe an' well, I should call it a day an' be grateful she e'er gave me a chance."

[demivampirew]

How are all of you doing? I hope you are well ♥ I just wanted to pop up for a second to say I'm doing ok. I've realised that the last time I posted something here was right at the start of the year when I got covid-19 and me not posting for months can look like something happened to me. I'm doing just fine. I continued with symptoms for months and I still haven't fully recovered; my headaches are constant, although I suspect they might have something to do with cervical problems, previously diagnosed. I've been dealing with depression too, trying to socialize and get out more now that the world is slowly getting back to "normal" but not being able to do so. And, I feel always tired, which is normal when you are depressed, unfortunately.

Another reason I haven't posted in a while is that I'm not in the mood to create new content. It's not a secret anymore that I'm mad at Henry for the way he's treated his loyal fans, throwing us under the bus because he failed to single out the people actually harassing his family, friends and that woman; then complete silence, then back to pushing us to have to see her and her dog, then back to silence, then pretending she didn't exist when he was promoting The Witcher, then pushing her down our throats, even if he knows at least half of his fandom can't stand her -great for him to do while claiming he appreciates privacy, like he said less than a year before that woman showed up on his life and ours, unfortunately. And now, seeing that he used Kal to promote a product and she used her for his charity, again, knowing half of his fandom, probably more, hates her, it's absolutely heartbreaking.

The thing is that I'm still hopeful he'll be back to be himself someday and, that's probably the reason why I'm still his loyal fan...? -I believe I am because I still spend a lot of time supporting his shows and movies but, I'm sure now I carry the label of "bitch" "You're not a fan, you're a hater" and so on.

Anyway, I don't want this post to be a testament and it's already too long, so I'll just finish by saying that I'm so thankful for all the people who understand how I feel or maybe doesn't but still supports me and thinks my feelings are valid. I'm thankful for those who care about me and have sent me lots of messages and asks asking how I was doing. All the people who still support my blog and follow me, like and reblog my stuff, thank you so much ♥

I know the gif doesn't match my post but look at him, laughing, I miss that so much ♥😭

[kunikinnie]

Hello!! I really love your works and I love the way you captured Kunikida's personality, especially with your hcs for how easily the bsd characters would fall in love lol! He's an absolutely precious noodle with big heartl!! <33 If you're still accepting requests, could I request some hcs or a legit prose for Kunikida accidentally touching his crush or getting physically close to them and how he'd react? Just something cute and fluffy, if you don't mind!! Thank you I hope you have a great day! ❤

a/n: aww thank you for your kind words, anon! I was debating on whether to include a certain portion of this drabble or not, but I decided to keep it. I hope that's okay and that this is fluffy enough! hehe

warnings: mentions of sexual harassment

kunikida accidentally touching his gn!crush

The desire of the heart becomes the strategy of the mind. All that is left to do is to make it a reality. Unfortunately for Kunikida, since his heart and brain are in sync they simultaneously freeze right at the moment before any of his plans come to fruition.

He has always wanted to become a more apparent figure in your life: not just platonically, but also romantically. But that's where all the problems arise.

He can't seem to get close to you no matter how hard he tried.

Of course, this does not go unnoticed by the great Dazai Osamu. His poor coworker's feelings are not well hidden, after all, but out of generosity he's decided to help him.

"Why don't you go instead, Kunikida-kun?"

The blonde had just assigned this next mission to the two of you, ready to focus on the backlog of paperwork but this sudden suggestion threatened his plans. "Wh-what are you-"

"This new one is more in your expertise, no? Besides, it's not good for you if you sit here in the office for too long. Your spine might get curved!"

"Ah, is that so..." Kunikida repeated his coworker's words as he scribbled them down in his notebook.

"Just kidding."

It's a wonder that Dazai is still alive, given how much he gets strangled on a daily basis. You were already used to the sight, however, and simply smiled at the two rowdy men.

"Agh! Fine. I'll go with y/n. Just make sure some of the paperwork actually gets done once we get back here, or I'll really break your neck."

"Aw, thanks. Hope you also have a good time before you come back!"

---

Fortunately, the job was finished quickly - thanks to your skills, no doubt. Kunikida has always put you in high regard in terms of your work ethic and the way you always seem to do things happily. It's how he fell for you in the first place, but not that you should ever know that.

Or maybe, you could know that someday. He just hopes it won't be too painful or embarrassing once you do find out his true feelings.

"Ahh... I just want to sleep on the agency's sofa," you said through a yawn.

"The day is almost over. You can go home once you get your things from the office, you know."

You were standing on the platform of the subway station, eagerly awaiting for the train to arrive. "But it's nice and dry and cold in the office. I'm tired of feeling sticky from the humidity, so I guess it'll rain soon."

Deep inside, he wished you had suggested that you eat out somewhere instead. It would have been a good excuse to both replenish his energy and to spend more time with you, after all.

But as the train began to slow down and open its doors, staying in the cool office during a rainy afternoon started to sound more appealing.

"Ah, it's already jam-packed."

Rush hour train rides were always this hectic. For once, it would have been better if his schedule had been delayed if only to avoid getting stuck on the train. But it was too late to go back.

You squeezed yourself between the wave of people going in and out the train and your coworker was following close behind. Once you both got secure spots - albeit very tight and not very comfortable ones - you sighed out of relief. It was nice that Kunikida was tall and you felt safer with him next to you.

While you were relatively calm at the whole situation, your companion was internally having three simultaneous crises. Since you've worked in the agency you were never this close to him, ever. He could feel your breathing and your head almost rested on his chest. God forbid you get too close and hear just how loud and fast his heart was beating right now - he would die on the spot.

His right arm grabbed onto the handlebar to steady not just himself but also you, if you needed to grab onto his arm that is. Not that you had to but if you wanted to the option is right there.

You suddenly let out a small yelp. At first he was flustered that he had accidentally touched you or made you uncomfortable, but when he saw the face of the middle-aged man next to you Kunikida's free hand moved on its own.

"How dare you."

The wrist of the lowlife was about to be nearly twisted to the point of no return until he felt a tug on his waistcoat.

"It's okay."

Him being angry was an understatement; how could you let this scoundrel just get away with this? Your eyes met his and he immediately understood. He let go of the arm he grabbed and shot him a final glare before leaving it alone.

Tsk. If only there was more space in this fricking oven-

Finally, your stop had arrived. The fresh but damp air that hit the two of you once you ascended the stairs confirmed your predictions. It was heavily raining outside.

"Hmph. It's a good thing I checked the forecast before we-"

Although his hand rummaged through his suitcase, the umbrella he packed was nowhere to be found. He swore it did put it there before you left - of course unless a certain master pickpocket took it out.

Dazai-!

You couldn't help but chuckle at the situation. "He really never gives you a break, does he?"

You offered your umbrella to share. Out of his pride Kunikida said no, but you insisted. "Would you rather wait here in the station for who knows how long?"

"F-fine. Let me hold it, then."

The agency wasn't too far off from the station so at least neither of you will get too drenched. But Kunikida could clearly feel that you were still getting wet. He leaned the umbrella closer to your side when you suddenly reacted.

"Hey now you'll get wet!"

Before he knew it you moved even closer to him, and if your shoulders brushed before now they were literally sticking to each other.

Every step each of you took he could feel which caused his face to grow redder by the second. The rubbing of shoulders - or should I say entire upper arm - was sparking a fire within him. He was partly ashamed that you had to endure this, but a greater part of him was only too thrilled at the situation. The sound and smell of the rain and your intoxicating presence contained within the bounds of your little umbrella.

If he could only store this memory forever.

As all good things begin, they too must end. The entire walk was mere moments to him and he couldn't help but feel his heart sink once you two reached the building. He was once again back in reality. The damned paperwork was calling to him, he thought.

"Uhm, Kunikida-san?"

He turned his head to face you but you weren't looking at him at all. Since his glasses were foggy and full of water droplets, he couldn't clearly see your face but somehow he could make out some flushed color on your cheeks.

"If you're free, would you like to join me for dinner later? A-as a thank you for earlier, of course."

He couldn't believe his ears. Were the good things not coming to and end just yet? Without knowing it, his lips formed that rare, gentle smile you were always longing to see.

"Yes, I'd love to join you."

extra: "hey Kunikida-kun you should at least treat me to dinner as thanks too 🥺"