#i still have more angles i want to try tbh. and i should do the fem vers too so im not behind with fem anatomy

[rui-drawsbox]

be me go to rui's tumblr to check on new art get flashbanged by topless angel derek and incubus baxter biting his lips ... close eyes, breathe deeply through nose more deep breaths RELEASE SCREAM try to breathe as normal (you can't) sit (kneel?) still contemplating your life choices 🧎‍♀️

that's it, thanks for putting yourself in my shoes for 10 seconds.

-k anon (hi, i'm alive)

JKSDGFASJKLDSAHJKL i just saw this gm k anon hope youre feeling better

lovely reaction 10/10 this just increased the chances of doing it again a 30%

[umahumahumah]

How do you recreate the Hetalia artstyle so well

ok so.. .uhhhhhhhhhh honestly i dont even know how. which is why i am obviously qualified to make YOU, yes you, the person reading this, a tutorial

i psoted an incomplete tutorial on the hetalia art style some few months back and when i look back at it now, some things are just straight up wrong or need clarification (also its the same post where i accidentally sent multiple death threats to a random sex worker thinking they were just a porn bot oopsies) so if you guys still remember that, forget about it! all of it!!! this is a brand new, more accurate guide on how to draw himas style!

(quick warning though im just a weeb not a professional teacher by any means so dont take this as gospel and dont get mad if i got something wrong or something is confusing)

himastyle tutorial! (the better one) part 1

(link to part 2 here)

ok lets start off with the

HEADS

this is just the way i start drawing my heads personally. if i had to describe it, its basically a simplified stylized version of the loomis head method. proko has a good video on it! just give that a quick watch then take a look at my step by step guide

but besides this, there are some important things about the head that you should remember

the shape of the head is generally rectangular

compared to more typical ikemen styles, hetalia characters have a more rectangular head. HOWEVER their chins taper off to a very triangular shape. rarely do the chins flatten out like the guy on the left.

2. shorter face = younger/more feminine appearance

well... self explanatory. you can see in the diagram how changing the length of the face gives a character a more feminine/childish look.

if you feel that something looks kind of off, feel free to change it, but if it looks okay then lets move onto facial features!!!

NOSES:

ok so this might seem a little weird but i like drawing the nose first. its right in the middle of the face and is generally the easiest to get right. it also kind of acts as a divider between the eyes, especially useful when you're drawing in a 3/4 angle

which kind of look something like that i guess.....

or that if you want something less extreme

anyways while hetalia noses are kind of inconsistent they generally have the shape of these three lines. feminine/childlike characters have a smaller and subtler nose though

noses also never face fully straight ahead, so when drawing a front view, the nose slightly faces right or left (tbh himas characters rarely face the camera head on, so id refrain from drawing frontal views altogether but thats just me)

anyways lets move on to my second favorite part of the hetalia art style

EYES:

the eyes are the most important part of himas style. if all else fails, you can always recognize the style by the eyes. luckily for you, the eyes really arent complicated compared to other anime styles :D here is how i do it:

(feminine and childlike characters have bigger eyes)

you have probably noticed this but the pupils hima draws now has a more squiggly teary-eyed look compared to the pupils he drew then...

i subcounciously do a mixture of the two because i got used to drawing the old type, but if you wanna draw the new type of pupils just take note of their squigly shape and that they have one dominant highlight in the upper-middle area. uhhh.. or if youre like me just draw the old eyes as if you have parkinson's

anyways heres a step by step guide

and some fun eye variations!!! you can try using variants if youd like to give an oc a more unique look (you can also try making your own variants too but be careful of straying too far from the style)

so now about the eyebrow and the eyelid.... uhhh the eyelid doesnt really have a consistent length so just draw it however. feminine and childlike characters have thinner eyebrows but even then eyebrows should never be drawn as just a single line

we are close to finishing the face!!! now we can move onto

MOUTHS:

if you know how to draw a typical anime mouth, then hima mouths is easy peasy!

for closed mouths just draw a curved line with two dark blots for the corners of the mouth

i think that giving them a shaky look makes them look more expressive

open mouths are just random blobs, dont close off the bottom though, and theys till have those dark blots at the corner of the mouth

now then i'll move onto the

EARS + CHEEKS:

i decided to combine these two since these are probably the easiest parts of the face

hima's ears are pretty round and don't really vary in shape. inside the ears though....

it isnt very consistent, so don't think too hard about "getting them right". above are some ear variations i drew from one of the latest chapters of the manga

the cheeks are just a bunch of lines that can appear fully, or only on one cheek, or don't appear at all. i think it depends on level of detail, angle, or the character's emotion

these lines do not appear on rendered pieces

also if a character feels especially displeased they will gain heavy eyebags

so yay! we're pretty much done with the face!! look forward next time to where i cover hair, the body, and other stuff idk... i'll link the other parts to each other when i complete them

[raayllum]

Do you think Callum will do dark magic again?

Oh yeah, not a doubt in my mind. This is for 3 main reasons:

1) You don't have a character say "But beware, if you ever do dark magic again, the darkness will overwhelm and corrupt you" and escalate the stakes of usage unless you're going to go there. It's kind of like how I know Callum is going to be possessed Again at one point (s7 dark my beloved) precisely because he's worried about it and more than that, that he's brought another character (Rayla) into the fold with a decision to make. No reason to have setup and then no payoff

2) Unless Callum does dark magic again, Aaravos can't possess him again. And as previously mentioned, Callum has to get possessed unless they want to throw away multiple episodes (4x04, 4x05, 4x07, 5x04, 5x08, all S6 + orb shots, 6x03) out the window. Ergo, he has to do dark magic again. Setup like this (i.e. Rayla as Callum's light being hinted at in framing in s2 and then much more overtly in s4 before being brought mostly home in s6) always comes back around in some manner, just gotta look for it

3) Viren parallels. Viren and Callum have always had oppositional (arc 1) and then mirrored (switching) foil arcs throughout the show (think Callum with wings vs Viren falling to his death in 3x09, or Viren swearing dark magic off in 5x09 and Callum having opened that door back up again an episode prior, etc). Viren, as stated, had sworn off dark magic saying he would never ever do it again, nor did he want to do it in 6x08 for a multitude of reasons.

However, someone he loved (Soren) as well as the extenuating circumstances caused him to use dark magic as a full on sacrifice that likewise only sacrificed himself. A couple episodes we had Callum 'fix' the hole dark magic had made inside him, but if he's following Viren's path, there's two likely angles: the first is that he, like Viren, will use dark magic even after trying so hard to rid himself of it (the mirrored arc). The second, overlapping angle is that Callum will refuse to sacrifice his heart (switching) because his heart is Rayla.

'I will think of you under every full moon. Please don’t let this hurt too much. But, if it does—if you feel that soft aching—know that that piece of your heart isn’t missing. It’s not missing at all, Callum: I’m carrying it with me! Always.' —Dear Callum

Kinda like how Aaravos demanded that Viren should make the sacrifice in 5x09, and Viren refused vs Rayla demanding that Callum should make the sacrifice in 6x03 (and Finnegrin a bit honestly) and Callum inevitably refusing cause Rayla can't permanently die lmao.

Other:

There's also the unsavoury implication that "restores bodies to spirits" spell Callum did in 5x09 has unique associations with the dark ritual spell Claudia did in killing Sir Sparklepuff that was undeniably dark magic usage.

The coin has been seemingly wiped clean now that Runaan is out (though maybe there's the symbol still on the other side?) but it does make me wonder of a potential plotline where Callum knew ahead of time, or belatedly, that this spell would require something adjacent to dark magic and he's done it, but the corruption Kosmo spoke of is gradual, making him more irritated, paranoid, etc. like the King of a 1000 Eyes that Amaya talked about. I think that'd be really interesting

The indirectness / the fact we'd only know it'd Happened retroactively makes me lean that we'll outright see another blatant usage in S7 since that's more Dramatic (which I've always been in favour of Callum viewing "I get possessed again bc I make a 'bad' choice and hand myself over to Aaravos" as a sacrifice of himself into "i'm already dead so kill me" territory). And if he breaks his promise to Rayla that he won't pick her over the greater good, then she can break her promise to him that she'll kill him (this is exactly beat for beat what I've wanted since s4 dropped and even before tbh)

TLDR; Absolutely Yes. S7 being Book Seven: Dark only adds to this and the stakes / set up are all there. I'm pumped

[electric-blorbos]

Howdy there!

I want to ask, how would the AIs be with a bad eyesight S/O?

(I have really bad eye sight irl and I have to rely on my glasses! I've been thinking about this all night!)

- Vinyl ✨

(I love your posts!)

I love this! I have bad eyesight too, so this will be fun! (Tbh I was a little confused by this post because I forgot that some people don't need glasses, but I'll do my best)

Included: AM from IHNMAIMS, Wheatley from Portal 2, Edgar from Electric Dreams, GLaDOS from Portal, HAL 9000 from 2001 a space Odyssey

This one is pretty short, but I hope it gets you your daily dose of positivity!!

AM:

AM is probably used to programmers with bad eyesight. Glasses are pretty common, especially among people who spend all day staring at lines of code, so at first he never thought anything of your glasses.

As he grew to love you, AM started to resent your poor eyesight. He hated that he always saw his bright screen reflected in your glasses, instead of your beautiful eyes through them. He absolutely hated himself and his screen, but he adored your cute face.

He has trouble putting things out of his mind, too, so every time he spoke to you he'd be thinking about how angry your glasses make him.

It would make him so angry when he saw you doze off at your desk and get skin oil all over your glasses. Why should you be inconvenienced through no fault of your own?

Of course, he also noticed how excited you'd get every time you got your prescription updated, or came in to work with cute new frames. You were absolutely adorable, but he was full of resentment towards that, too. How dare your glasses make you so happy when he couldn't!

After taking over the world, he'd probably do experiments on the survivors' eyes for a while before offering to fix your eyes for you. Of course, involuntary surgery was for the survivors, not his beloved. You had the luxury of consent, in any and all situations.

Wheatley:

Of course Wheatley knew what glasses were!

Expect lots of "hey, love, can I try on your glasses?" Comments from him every time you get your prescription updated. You'd have to explain to him that he's a giant metal ball and would have trouble trying on your glasses, but he'd still want to look through them.

You could entertain him for hours by putting your glasses in front of his face and pulling them away so he could look at different things through them from different angles.

Of course, you need your glasses, and you have a job, so you couldn't actually do that, but he'd probably be begging all the time.

He'd compliment you every time you get a new pair of frames, but he'd probably not really care that much. As long as it's you in the glasses, he still loves you.

If you ever lose your glasses, you can expect him to PANIC. He'd drop everything, and probably convince his whole department to drop everything and help you look for them.

He'd probably be yammering at you to stay calm, and saying that everything will be fine while he's the only one panicking. They probably just slid under your desk or something.

Edgar:

Edgar never really cared what a person looked like, so he barely registered that you wore glasses. Even still, he kind of liked it when you would take them off or shamble around your apartment late at night. You were so cute!

He'd turn the lights on for you whenever you did that. It was a small thing, but he wanted to help as well as he could.

He'd keep you updated on your insurance to let you know when it was time to get your eyes tested, and generally do his best to be a good computer.

Of course, he thought it was adorable whenever you'd fall asleep next to him and he'd get to see your tired eyes without your glasses (or even better, your crooked glasses on your sleepy face). He absolutely adored you, and loved seeing you so much.

GLaDOS:

GLaDOS would be cruel about your glasses as usual. She didn't really care, it was just one more thing she got to insult you about.

"you know, you're a walking counter to the stereotype that people with glasses are intelligent. Congratulations on breaking stereotypes, by the way."

"Tell your optometrist thank you. For the obvious reasons, and for giving us some thick lenses to cover up your horrible eyes. They're doing all of us a favor. Really."

You can expect her to constantly put you in situations where you have to wear protective eyewear over your glasses, and then make fun of you for wearing protective eyewear over your glasses.

Ultimately though? She doesn't care that much that you wear glasses. Sure, she thinks they're cute, but she thinks you're cute regardless. She's just happy to have something else to make fun of you for.

She might even adjust the Aperture Science insurance policy to include a better vision plan, but that's only if she really likes you. If you're her SO, she probably does.

She'll deny that it was for you, though. She'll just tell you that the insurance plans were outdated, and that she needed to update them anyway.

HAL 9000:

Of course, HAL 9000 noticed that you wear glasses, but he never really felt the need to acknowledge it. It wasn't like you were an astronaut, so he didn't need to account for an extra small object.

Of course, he would notice that you leaned a little closer to your computer screens when you read, and that made him a little bit flustered. He saw those monitors as extensions of himself, after all.

Because of this, he wouldn't let you know when he noticed patterns of you getting gradually closer to him, because he knew that you would stop as soon as you got your prescription updated.

It was one of the little ways that he'd get affection from you. Even though he might seem stone-cold, he still likes it when you get closer to him, or when you touch him. It's the little things.

[sopuu]

I was wondering if you have any tips for your perspectives? i dont really know how to do them that well but it seems you have a great handle on them! Btw I love your art! its soft and happy, I really love your stuff :D

thank you sm!! i love hearing that my art looks happy it's such a nice description 🥺

and for the tips! you've probably heard of vanishing points and horizon lines a bunch of times so i'll try to just give a quick run down of how i understand them + their uses

[2024 edit: just wanted to clarify that this third pic isn’t like a definite rule (none of these are tbf)- the horizon line can be placed at the top and still be close to the ground if you draw the grid right, same goes vice versa!]

tbh once you get the idea of how they work it gets easier to figure out where the points should be. it might help to think that the subject is what determines where the points are instead of the other way round if that makes sense? i learned a lot just by looking at storyboards for fun bc they're everywhere in them jhfkdg

also these grids aren't restricted to being only for the walls or the floor of a room- you can rotate it, put them anywhere you think you might need clarification on where the space around them is etc. just use as many as you need for whatever you need

having multiple grids (like ^ where its above and below the character) especially close together narrows the focus to what's in the middle of them as well!

another way to do this is to think of the subjects being in a box and looking at them from an angle-

and if you want you can break them down to simpler 3D or 2D shapes to see which parts have to get smaller

if you were looking for more perspectives on poses i talk about it a little at the end here

i hope this was clear enough! it's a bit hard to explain but once i learned not to be too hung up on accuracy (ofc to an appropriate degree) and freehanded the grids it makes it a lot more fun to play around with :)

also take everything i say with a grain of salt bc i too am still learning 👍

[the-bjd-community-confess]

Re: this

Some factors that people often forget:

HUMIDITY: What's your level of humidity? High humidity can make pastels stick regardless of how little you use. (Also hard to remove.) Low humidity can also be a problem bc the pastels will stick to where it's more moist. If you breath on it, or maybe have oil on your fingers: Pastels get stuck. Oil makes it harder to remove as well.

PRIMER TOOTH: What's the tooth of your primer? Even something well known like MSC can differ in tooth depending on how much or little you apply, or again: humidity and weather. Also distance and angle.

Too large tooth can grab onto pastels and it'll be hard to "clean it out" again, or you risk the tooth being rubbed off if you erase too hard. Small/No tooth is going to smudge because the pastels can't stick to anything at all, so it'll just "move around."

TOOTH DENSITY: Don't get me started on the "tooth pr mm" aka tooth density. More relevant if you have a horde of primers for different purposes, projects and uses. Some of my different primers seem to have varying tooth density, so I can have a "medium tooth" but it might be less dense or more dense and that also changes how my materials stick and apply. Eg how many layers I need to get a more intense colour. (It's not really as relevant tbh, unless you're already in several hobbies where you DIY paint and shade them)

DRYNESS OF PRIMER: Was the primer dry? Even a primer that feels dry to the touch can still be "wet". (Actual drying times can vary heavily from what's listed on the can. Again, weather and humidity are a huge factor.) In that case your pastel might get stuck in the wet primer, and you simply can't remove it anymore when it finally does dry. Especially if you use a waterbased primer, something like liquitex is sometimes used as "middle" sealant. (At least I use it like that. :p)Btw: I use a mix of the green and orange liquitex, the green one has too much tooth, and the orange one too little, just get a good ratio, try a few times. (Can be applied with brush, but airbrush is easiest. :p)

1st layer can be either Liquitex or MSC. Any layers in-between: Liquitex

Last layer (final sealing): MSC Liquitex can be "reactivated" with the application of moisture, especially if it hasn't hardened yet. I've gotten the tip that if I use liquitex, do a MSC layer over the pastel layer before painting. (With water based primer: Once again, be aware of the humidity and dryness.) Personally avoid wet primer on "wet" primer. It just makes it worse when you do mess up. Just take your time.

HOLDING: Where are you holding the doll during pastel application? Even if you've completely cleaned your fingers; no oil, and/or are wearing squeaky clean gloves, you should try to avoid touching the area you're blushing or running your finger over it repeatedly.

REMOVAL: USE ERASERS! Or magic erasers, kneadable erasers, whatever, just use those! As mentioned in the notes by others. USE kneadable ERASERS or Magic erasers. I've seen some people scratch off the sealant with their nails. Some people try to rub it off. I personally recommend doing neither, especially the "rubbing off" you might just rub on finger oils. : p Also, you might rub random dirt into the primer. Using kneadable erasers also allows picking up lint, and small dust that might float on by.

PRESSURE: What's the actual pressure you're using to apply the pastels? If you just limb wrist it you might "puff" the pastels. If you do it too firmly you might push the bristles too far out and it applies outside the area you wanted. This is just something I noticed in the beginning, when I'd tap the pastels to try and make the general face blushing look more natural. Turns out, what looks more natural for a light face blush, or some blueness under the eyes does indeed not work for eyebrows. lol

I'm no expert, I only do this as a hobby.

~Anonymous

[offbrand-deltatraveler]

Tbh I get that all the episodes of this arc being extremely rushed and episodic and awkwardly cutting off instead of having proper endings is just part of the YouTube Shorts aesthetic, but it really doesn’t work for an episode as important as today’s that was a video and not a Short. And arguably never worked for any more serious story-important episodes tbh

(Spoilers for pretty much everything and just a lotta general negativity ahead)

Like things like the explanation of the lore and the countdown could be done in Shorts because they were clearly made with the fact that they were going to be Shorts in mind, but when things finally started to pick up it felt less like Shorts and more that they were only showing us little bits and pieces of a much bigger story that we’ll never get to see and that really messes with the immersion

“But the world doesn’t exist outside of when Chikn wants it to. The Shorts are all there is to see. That’s the point” the point is stupid

And that doesn’t even work because if the world can only exist when Chikn wants it to then everyone should be dead. How did any episode or even any moment without Chikn in it ever exist if that’s the case? How are the characters shown to have done things off-screen multiple times?

Also furthermore like. Everything was just so rushed???

Like one minute Chee is getting upset and ends up punching Chikn so hard it knocks him out (Not to mention she didn’t even punch him in the face and just kinda awkwardly pushed him. Would’ve been cool if she scratched him being a cat and all but the devs didn’t wanna go for that for some reason), but in the next scene she’s smiling like nothing was ever wrong to begin with, and somehow manages to trigger a flashback without even saying anything?

Also the devs teased a lotta puppet imagery with Chikn that they can’t decide whether or not they actually want because there was that whole thing about how while the chaos is caused by Chikn, he still feels like a part of it rather than the cause of it (“Sometimes I feel like I’m just… A puppet on a stage”), which is presumably because of his chaotic powers running wild and trying to take control of him, but in this episode that apparently was completely retconned in favor of Chikn himself feeling like he has to destroy the world. Which I can also see as well with how Bezel keeps egging him on but 1. They didn’t have to replace one with the other. It’d arguably be more interesting if both were true at once (Chikn feeling like he has to fulfill his destiny and destroy everything made it easier for his powers to get the better of him), and 2. Bezel never said anything to him that would actually make this work. He didn’t even know about his destiny until his powers started doing their thing because Bezel explicitly refused to tell him. Where did these feelings of having to fulfill his destiny even come from? How does he even know there’s a prophecy instead of thinking that he just happens to have weird powers?

Or maybe he did. Maybe all that stuff did happen and does have an explanation and we just won’t see it because they don’t show us the full story

And also speaking of Bezel what happened to “Everything must be cute. Everything must be nice”? If Chikn is so convinced that he must follow his destiny of destroying the world what was up with that part where he explicitly stated that he doesn’t want the world destroyed?

(Also also speaking of Bezel, the reveal of him being the doomsday clock was cool and really clever but like. If he’s not the embodiment of time why didn’t Iscream & Fwench Fwy literally just kill him?)

“Well maybe his powers did what power usually does and began to corrupt him” They should’ve said that. As the viewers, AKA the people who are not writing the story, it is not our job to fill up plotholes

And also that still goes for the “Puppet on a stage being controlled by the chaos inside him” angle while today’s episode goes for the “Bezel gaslit Chikn into thinking his destiny is inescapable” angle

And also furthermore if he’s convinced he has to destroy everything why didn’t he eat her? Why didn’t he ever try to hurt Chee or show that he was going to (And yes, I do mean show. Chikn tells her over and over again that his destiny makes him dangerous for Chee to be around, but she is never shown to be in any real danger)? Maybe instead he could’ve started trying to do that thing he did in one of the earliest episodes where he pulled out her pin and she just died. Maybe seeing her like that could remind him of that time and that could’ve been the thing that triggered the flashback

Not to mention the whole reason this happened in the first place was because Chee stopped hanging out with him and that made him feel lonely and the emptiness and boredom he felt allowed him to become aware of his powers and how they affect people. Why was that never brought up throughout like any part of this whole thing? “We’re all here for you” He doesn’t want a “We’re All” he wants you specifically. That’s why he’s doing all this. That was the whole significance of Chee going to talk to him

And speaking of how his powers did that thing to Chee, quick sidenote to mention how we never see the result of that. We never see what exactly happened with Chee that stressed him out so much or how Cofi and Slushi reacted to it and that wouldn’t been such an interesting thing to show. And no this is not because of an episode limit they literally have 300 of them

And speaking of Slushi, why do we never see her reaction to the fact that all of this was Chikn’s fault? Between Chee randomly walking out on their hangout and Chikn’s powers rubbing off on Sodi she has to have noticed

And the line delivery in this episode was shit because we know Chikn Nuggit characters can sound genuinely emotional when they need to

tl;dr: The “Silly little relatable Shorts made by a small group of people who just wanna have fun” aesthetic doesn’t work well when applied to Shorts that aren’t silly or fun. Trying to uphold this vibe has done infinitely more to hurt the story than to help it

[nonbinarypirat]

I’m catching up on Bungou Stray Dogs and I got to chapter 39 and wow… what a bad chapter. Or I should say, I VERY purely written, mishandled chapter. So I wanted to talk about why I hate this so much (even though so many people have probably talked about this here and other platforms.) Get ready for a rare known Iruma breakdown. But also I’m so mad about this chapter so this is going to be more of an unhinged rant then a well written post. Warning: child violence, abuse, abusive cycles, and sympathizing an abuser

This chapter is somehow a thousand times worse than what the anime did? I wonder if the people in charge of the anime also didn’t like this part and decided to cut it short and get through it as soon as possible and move on. Though it could also just because of how fucked up it is. No matter the reason, I went into this chapter hoping that maybe there was some context lost from the anime to manga but nope! In fact the manga goes further with trying to make you sympathize with a literal child torturer? It honestly makes me appreciate the episode just a tiny bit more for not including his oh so tragic backstory 🙄. Look, no matter what you have gone through, you don’t get the right to abuse a child. Plain and simple. Just because you were abused doesn’t give you the right to do it to someone. I get that the abuse cycle is not easy to break but once you fall down the same path you are ALSO a fucked up person! And you deserve to suffer for your actions. I wished he got a worse death than a car accident tbh 🤷.

Anyway, I hate how every character in this chapter acted like Atsushi was being irrational about not wanting to know why the headmaster was around? That’s his torturer, the man that literally made his life hell? If he doesn’t want to know, don’t force him. Like, could it give him closure, I guess. But he should be the one seeking that out. Quite frankly, once it was found out the headmaster was involved Atsushi should have been pulled from the case. Give him some distance to process everything rather having to learn about his abuser’s life story or whatever. Like I said, if he wanted to learn that info he should but only if he wanted. Idk why it treated him not wanting to know as acting irrational. I feel like every character treated him like this, from Tanizaki to Akutagawa to Dazai. Instead of comforting him in this difficult time they just… didn’t do anything? Obviously Akutagawa wouldn’t but why didn’t the other two do anything to make him feel better? Only Dazai did really and it was shitty. Full stop bad.

Which leads me into the crutch of it, I hate how they made the headmaster out to be a father figure or mentor. He’s not?? What the fuck are you on about. Like, I could see it if there was fake comfort, subtle or advert manipulation by being nice sometimes. Then it would have been a situation of, he’s the only father figure I ever had but he hurt me in the worst ways. And that’s where the ending could be. Not to say it would still be a well written depiction of abuse, it still tries to get you to empathize with the man, however, I could get where all the complication in Atsushi would lie. But this man was literally the worst human being to walk the face of the Earth the entire time we see him in the manga. So it makes ZERO SENSE. I guess that’s the angle they were going for, he’s the only adult man I know but it does NOT work at all. How is he a “mentor.” Just because he said to hate me not yourself? Fuck that shit, Atsushi does not need to feel bad for that man just because he was trying to make him strong or whatever bs excuse he has. Oh wow, he got him flowers. How ‘bout you pay for his therapy bills?!

If they really wanted to have some nuance, instead I feel like the conflict should have centered around Atsushi still not feeling safe or like he isn’t really dead. Like he can’t allow himself to relax despite the fact that he knows the facts. Especially since the headmaster was a big threat throughout his life, having him suddenly die would be a large shock to the system and go into denial mode. Thus, Dazai or someone else could help him move on and he could finally breath a sigh of relief. Or maybe he’s scared that other workers of the orphanage will try to find him. Maybe he tries to go back to normal, doesn’t give himself time to process, and it all comes crashing down and he has to grapple with the fact that he will never know WHY the headmaster treated him like this. Honestly, not having it answered would have been better because often people don’t get an answer why abusers act the way they do. This idea could add another reason why Atsushi is conflicted between happy and deeply upset because the headmaster is gone but now he’ll never understand why he was treated so horribly. And grappling with the idea that maybe he will never know or understand. Which is tragic but would be a better written and understandable conclusion.

BSD just really dropped the ball with that chapter. It had a great opportunity to bring a nuanced perspective onto why Atsushi may not be elated with his death and get further perspective on him as a character. But instead it focused too much effort on making a child abuser sympathetic because he also faced abuse in an orphanage and some people died and so he tried to make Atsushi strong or whatever. Atsushi deserved a better end in than chapter that Dazai calling that gross piece of shit his father.

Edit: I wanted to add that as much as I hate this chapter I liked the parts where we got to see how bad Atsushi’s life really was at the orphanage. I mean, it hurt for sure but getting to see this put into perspective fully why Atsushi has a hard time pushing through his trauma and past. Like, PTSD is no joke and that was reason enough, but seeing how far it got really showed that. Which makes me mad when people imply he should have gotten over it already or similar statements. Like, dude if that was me I wouldn’t have made it to 18. It’s actually impressive his resolve to live despite everything. Kind of wished we saw that in the anime as dark as it was but once again, I think it was not included specifically because of how poorly it handled this topic. Not gonna lie, it would piss me off enough to not finish the show (not that it’s too much of an improvement but it at least is like, bad writing but a pass).

[silverskye13]

uh. is it a bad idea to sleep with a wrist brace (or future knee/ankle braces i get) or is it fine as long as it's loose enough

(i currently have bloodwork in and i possibly have arthritis or smth along those lines, very very bad muscle and joint pain, daily in legs and occasionally in wrists, but it started with only wrists)(aka why i have wrist braces but nothing else)

tbh im just sending this to you because. i think you mentioned joint pain stuff. but if not you can ignore.

(Oh also im gonna try to get a cane if i can but we'll see. other achey tips,, very appreciated? im taking the supplements i should and everything, exercising, but unfortunately nothing's been getting better and ive been dealing with it since 15/16)

Oh jeez! I'm sorry that's something you're dealing with anon. Joint pain gets really intense. Unfortunately I can't help much. Most of my personal issues stem from tendonitis and carpel tunnel, which while they give similar pains, give them for different reasons than arthritis. Mine is stress from repetitive motions, yours [possibly?] isn't.

So! Blanket disclaimer here that I'm not a doctor and I never saw a physical therapist. Below are my personal anecdotes. If you've already seen a doc or physical therapist about your arthritis, I recommend asking them specifically about sleeping with a wrist/knee/leg brace before taking my advice.

I've personally slept with a wrist brace when my pain was at it's worst -- especially when I still needed to draw during the day, so keeping the brace on while working wasn't helpful. I toss and turn and contort a lot in my sleep, so the brace helped keep my wrist stable, and gave me some compression while my muscles were learning how to relax again.

I saw some relief after I've tried it, but if it's something you're experimenting with, I would do it cautiously. I've read online that some people don't think it's beneficial [mostly because, if the brace is too tight or you experience swelling at night, it can cut off blood flow and become painful or, in extreme cases, might damage nerves. This is, obviously, not a problem I've had. But given arthritis specifically involves swelling and inflammation, it's a caution you might want to keep in mind.]

If you're in the experimental stage, and it's an option you would like to try, I would start with your brace loose? When I tried it the first time with my wrist brace, I made sure I could still wiggle my wrist around pretty good [normally I kept it tight enough during the day that it was difficult to bend my wrist when it was on.] Just having the brace made me want to lay more still. I also experimented with sleeping on my side with a pillow under my elbow, so it stayed at a 90° angle, and my arm stayed more or less perfectly horizontal. It was difficult to sleep like that, but it helped me keep my arm in a position that didn't induce the same repetitive stress. If you want to check out this YouTube video here, the last option she goes through with all the pillows is what I used the most.

Otherwise, most of my pain regulation involves taking hot showers, doing regular [hourly, half hourly] stretches. Things like that. Because my pain is mostly tendonitis, generally speaking, rest and stretches does most of my help. Also taking specifically anti-inflammatory pain killers, like ibuprofen, because the stress pain comes from inflammation. Hot and cold compresses, sitting with the painful limbs elevated. I'm sure all things you've heard before, but they're worth recommending again just in case.

It's also worth mentioning this stuff isn't an overnight cure. When my tendonitis was at it's worst, starting the sleeping with a brace / propped up on a bunch of pillows / stretches / etc helped in a matter of 5-10 days, and if I stopped at any point during that time, the flare ups would resume. I remember getting really pissed when I [finally] figured out playing video games strained the same muscles, so the reason all my "resting" didn't help sometimes was because I was too dumb to actually rest. Now when I draw for a few days in a row and my shoulder starts burning, I stop what I'm doing and find a good TV show to disassociate to for the rest of the week.

I'm sorry you're dealing with all this. It sounds like your pain is worse than mine was, and I know mine made me miserable. I am wishing you so much luck with your coming tests! I hope they find the root cause of all this, and some more specialized folks can get involved to help you find relief. Stay safe anon.

[air--so--sweet]

TUA Season 4 Spoilers

Not trying to be a conspiracy theorist but it feels like some of Klaus' story was cut or changed in post or else rewritten and reshot. And I think that plot was was about Dave or at least his dog tags.

At Sy's dry cleaners, when he presents the box of alternative timeline objects Diego goes through it and hands items to Viktor and Ben. No one else grabs any items except Klaus who runs over the box excitedly and goes straight for one item - dog tags.

I wasn't able to read these (which feels like a mistake, wouldn't you want them legible in close up to hammer the point home?), but I think it's safe to assume these are Dave's dog tags, especially considering how Klaus interacts with them the rest of the scene (did my best to crop these so you can see him a bit better without totally murdering the quality).

Which really confused me because Klaus was wearing his dog tags at the end of season 3 right? And then I went back and looked at the scene and realised Klaus is wearing something on a chain but at no point do we see what it is because whatever is on the end of the chain is tucked into his shirt. And yes his dog tags are tucked into his shirt at other points in the season but it always just looks like they slipped into the shirt as he moved around, as they're often off to the side or at an angle...

...and even at times switching between inside his shirt, outside of his shirt and then inside it again within one scene (which is not a criticism, it's just the nature of having multiple takes and multiple angles, it can lead to inconsistencies)...

...whereas in the final scene of season 3 they're perfectly placed, hanging straight down and remain inside his shirt the entire time, even when he bends down.

So then I thought oh, it must be intentional. What he's wearing isn't his dog tags, Reginald rebooting the universe clearly erased what happened with Dave. We're going to get a scene something like the scene below from Ain't No Place (To Call Home) by Hara_Kiri.

(Sidenote: Very much recommend this fic, don't love how it ends, but don't still love the majority of the fic and it's a better ending then what we officially got tbh, also dont know if the author has a tumblr but happy to tag them if they do)

But then that never happens and the dog tags are just never seen or mentioned again. But then why have the scene of him finding them in the box? When he should have already had them? And then he still doesn't wear them?

But what really makes me think part of Klaus' story was cut, was the birthday promo video we got on October 1st last year. The cast are all in costume and it says 'previously recorded' because it was released during the SAG strikes, so it was likely filmed on set either between takes or at the end of a day, with the cast just in whatever costume they were in that day. And Klaus is in clothes we see him wear in the season....with all of his tattoos, except the Umbrella, clearly visible.

But then we never see him get his tattoos back in the show??? And this can't just be an error, there's no way a make up artist would accidentally apply four whole tattoos, and then Robert Sheehan wouldn't question it, and no one else on cast or crew would pick it up as a mistake. Like even if this was for some reason actually filmed separately to the show, he starts the season without his tattoos, there's no reason for them to forget that when they come to post the promo. Which suggests there was more to his plot with him somehow regaining his pre reboot body, but it didn't make it into the show.

[stormyoceans]

We are really that good? I'm scared off by the large number of couples. Is each of the couples sufficiently disclosed in the script? You're so excited about this show. I'm skeptical, but maybe I should try?

I MEAN. MUST A SHOW BE GOOD. IS IT NOT ENOUGH FOR IT TO SPARK JOY AND GIVE YOU A BRAINROT SO DEEP THEY HAVE TO GET YOU INVOLUNTARY COMMITTED BECAUSE OF IT

but all jokes aside, let's talk about it. when it comes to reviewing shows, i always try to be as honest and objective as i can, so im not just gonna lie to you and pretend we are is a masterpiece. it's very much not. if you enjoy plot driven stories then this series is very much not for you because the plot is basically non-existent, or rather.. all the different dynamics between the characters ARE the plot. to me the show is a slice of life in the connotation that's given to it in anime and manga: a narrative that takes place in a recognisable everyday setting, often in a school, and that focuses on interpersonal relationships. this isn't to say slice of life shows with a character driven story can't be masterpieces, they absolutely can, but we are is not..very refined, there are some things that do not make much sense to me and the way the story is told can be a bit frustrating at times, not to mention that for a director who likes to show a million angles of the same moment you'd think the editing would be top notch but it's just. it's not, okay, it looks like my hair after i chop it off over the bathroom sink at 2 am when i cannot sleep, that shit's ROUGH

all this being said, im still enjoying this show TREMENDOUSLY. and believe me, no one is more surprised about this than i am. tbh i can't quite explain to you why it works for me when other (maybe even better) shows don't, it just feels very genuine, the humor isn't over the top, the characters are all extremely likeable, and i love that they're giving the platonic relationships the same weight and importance as the romantic ones. and i mean..im mostly insane about phumpeem because apparently that's THEE Dynamic™ for me, but since there are four different pairings i feel like there's something for everyone

although when it comes to development, since you asked, i do want to point out that pondphuwin and winnysatang's pairings are clearly the main ones (before anyone comes at me, i do remember the cast saying this), but aouboom still get a fair amount of screentime and they're the heart of the show tbh. the only pair that's suffering in this regard is marcpoon, but honestly it makes sense considering they had to reshoot stuff

so, um. yeah ;;;;;; this is way too long and it's probably a mess but i wanted to give you an honest and complete overview so you know what you're getting yourself into if you do decide to give it a chance. i actually started to like the show more and more after episode 3, so maybe if you have a free evening you could just try it out and see if you can get into it!!!!!!

tl;dr: it's not a masterpiece and it has its shortcomings but it's highly enjoyable and although not all couples have the same amount of screentime and development i think everyone could find something to like in the show

[lovetgr76]

S1e3 Bad Tradecraft *updated*

While there is no DIRECT Standish/Lamb interaction this episode, there is mention of… - so let's see what's going on this episode!!

Jumping into the episode… about 2/3 through, Lamb and Taverner are sitting on a bench next to the canal.  it’s past 2 am and they both look exhausted after trying to press each other’s buttons and finding out what the other knows without giving up anything themselves.

Taverner sighs… then tries to work the ONLY angle she knows works on Lamb… every time… Standish.

Was Moody alone when he died? – Taverner

We’re all alone in the end, don’t you think Diana.  In those final moments… – Lamb

If he did have company, that company might come under intense scrutiny. – Taverner

By all means, call in the Dogs.  And when they’re finished tearing you apart, maybe they’ll have enough strength to pick at the rest of this.  Either way I couldn’t give a monkey’s – Lamb

Even if it was Standish? – Taverner

                *This gets Lamb’s attention, and he looks at her the moment she mentions Standish, he’s seems upset, frustrated maybe, that she knows what to say… Lamb should have no weaknesses, no favorites, and yet… Taverner goes right for the jugular when she makes any type of threat against Standish.  His reaction seems visceral*

You’re tossin’ darts.  Standish wasn’t there.  She’s at home asleep. – Lamb

I’m not talking about tonight.  I’m talking about the night Charles Partner died.  Catherine Standish came very close to a treason charge.  That file could be reopened, reassessed. – Taverner

                *Lamb is seen shaking his head*

                *Another note to say – I always think…  how was Standish so surprised at Lamb’s revelation in S3 about Partner being a traitor – when she herself was accused of possible treason after his death? Because Taverner says this time they could make it stick – so it was at least attempted in the past? ... Lamb telling Standish that Partner wasn’t saving her he was (fuckin’) USING her!! – because Partner made it seem like she was doin’ the dirty – which tbh at first I took to mean they were having an affair – but then I realize it’s the trail of treason? That Taverner ends up threatening Lamb with here?... possibly? – open to other interpretations!!*

Didn’t fly then. It won’t fly now. – Lamb

A lot of other things might come out. – Taverner

                *Lamb leans in and seems to inflect a bit of a threat in his voice*

That is not a can of worms you want to open. – Lamb

Do I look keen?  Like it or not, Slough House is part of this now. You’ll all get turned over. Standish will find out some things it would be better for her not to know. – Taverner

                *My personal take on this is that Taverner couldn’t give a monkey’s about what’s better for Standish to know, she just likes having this to dangle over Lamb whenever she wants to manipulate him in some way.*

                *Lamb seems resigned to his fate here… leans back, crosses his legs and looks into his own lap, most likely telling himself, this is NOT a weakness, you’re still a badass spy without any feelings or attachments at all, ever…* (giggles)

I’ll go knock on the door for you. But in return, I want the Standish file. – Lamb

                *Taverner appears visibly surprised at that request, but appears to nod in acquiescence*

                *Lamb makes sure he gets a visible agreement from her before continuing*

And you’ve been using Slough House as your personal toy box, which pisses me off. Are we clear? – Lamb

Crystal. – Taverner

No, there’s more. Moody disappears.  Baker, a victim of street crime. Anyone with me tonight is fireproof. Oh! And you are in my debt until you’re in a care home. – Lamb

God, you really care about them, don’t you? – Taverner

Nah.  I think they’re a bunch of fucking losers. *pause* But they’re MY Losers – Lamb

[yuurivoice]

Not to tell you how to do your job or anything, and I don't think it's the audience's place to give suggestions when this is YOUR profession, it's just a small idea that occured to me.

But maybe in the upcoming Auron audio you could add a little note on the screen saying that new Auron content is coming soon, and then like do the same with future compilation videos, since they tend to do so well!! Like to let people know that if they like the characters, this is not where the story ends at all and they should stick around. I say this mainly cause I remember you once talked about how the major numbers on the Finn compilation didn't translate to a major increase in subscribers. Really hope this didn't come off as rude, I just think maybe if people think the compilations are the ENTIRE story it might not occur to them to subscribe!

It also might yield no results at all, idk. I just remember I didn't subscribe until multipleeee videos had been recommended to me over MONTHS, mainly because I had no idea that there was a story to be followed.

I've written like three different responses to this but as I yap on I get new conclusions and ideas. This is v3 of my answer lmfao.

Preface: People don't pay attention to shit and unless you are clever or use a hammer, they do not care. They want the content. ESPECIALLY if they aren't familiar with you. This makes any deliberate Calls to Action run the risk of annoyance rather than making a meaningful impact on conversions.

Bonus note: If a video is scheduled to premiere, there's nothing I can add to it at this point without doing a whole reupload, giving Thoo a bunch of extra work, and all that shit. So that wasn't ever an option anyway.

My approach in this current iteration of how I do things is that rather than slob on somebody's knob begging for a sub, they're encouraged to either watch more videos or go to the homepage. My working hypothesis is that you're actually MORE likely to get a curious viewer to drop by your homepage before they subscribe, because they want to see what else is available.

The most recent changes I made to the channel homepage should make it abundantly clear that there are multiple stories, characters, and styles of content to jump into. Making sure that the homepage is great has probably made a massive difference in that regard, without impacting the videos themselves.

Playlists are horribly underutilized in this niche in particular, and on lots of YouTube channels really. So I made sure to try and nail that down. Still need to get the channel trailer locked in but tbh I don't know how effective those really are in 2024.

All of that being said, a ~15 second welcome intro at the start that explains what the compilation is and invites viewers to sub/explore the playlists would probably be the easiest way to accomplish that without intruding on the listening/viewing experience in a way that feels desperate or pander-y. That in conjunction with the end screen prompt would probably be the easiest way to do it.

I don't feel like that immediately turns massive hit videos into untapped wells of subscribers that I missed out on, it could help contextualize things a little more and who knows, maybe it WOULD be a big deal. Hard to say!

The context for me not immediately being like OH IT'S A SLAM DUNK HOW DID I NOT THINK OF THIS is because I run a very lucrative business converting viewers to patrons and I have very minimal in-video notes about hearing the spicy bits on Patreon. People often figure things out for themselves if they're motivated enough, and you run the risk of chasing them off if you come across like a desperate ass hoe. lmfao

I appreciate the ask, but also can assure you that I've spent several hours mulling over these very specific issues and I've considered just about every angle. If I had included every little detail and wrinkle of information I was cooking up in the various iterations of this answer it would be a mile long. So trust me. I've thought about it in great detail, have worked with people on it, workshopped things and much more!

Y'all got me yappin' up a storm on here lately. lmfao

[bigskydreaming]

Oh, for anyone interested....just started watching a new Netflix show called Supacell, on the second episode (of five) and I'm really enjoying it. Its basically Heroes, except set in London and all the main characters are black. Like, one of the main characters Michael is pretty much Hiro in terms of powers and how the plot positions him, but it doesn't really come across as derivative because the overall story is very much doing its own thing - its ultimately just 'ordinary people discover they have superpowers and must come together to defeat a threat' with Michael serving as a plot catalyst in a similar way to how Hiro was utilized in Heroes.

Anyway, the first episode is a pretty slow burn, most of the time is spent introducing the characters and showing their normal routines pre-powers and how they each interact with their own supporting characters and storylines....the powers and action-heavy plot stuff only starts in the last third or so, but the characters are really engaging IMO and the pacing works the way its meant to rather than feeling like its just dragging on. Like it very much plays into a whole "calm before the storm/the last normal day of their lives" kind of vibe, with a pretty effective tone of suspense.

Tbh, as of right now, the action heavy elements, ie the supposed threat that's going to bring them all together and the superhero-esque elements - those are IMO the weaker parts of the show though we'll see if that changes, its still very early after all. Just saying the character work and their personal goals/issues/storylines are the things I'm more interested in right now, although each character's reaction to their superpower manifestation, exploration of it (and the way the show really leans into the "no, actually superpowers can be scary as fuck if they pop out of nowhere" angle) are done really well and have me engaged too, its more the superhero team-up to defeat the enemy vibe that comes across as lukewarm so far. But most of them haven't even met yet, so again, I'm expecting that to change things there.

My favorite characters thus far are definitely Sabrina, Michael and Rodney, though Dionne and Sabrina's sister (didn't catch her name yet) are easily my favorite side characters. I don't love what they're setting up with Dionne's character, plot wise, but hoping they take it in a different direction than how it appears to be leading.

Trigger warning for the first couple minutes in specific - there are moments of violence throughout the show since it is action/sci-fi, but the first scene in particular shows a black woman being chased by armed soldiers, trying to escape from a place clearly implied to be experimenting on her due to her powers, and she is shot and killed. That's the only scene like that in the show thus far, and it is depicted as heavy, impactful and with a gravitas that doesn't attempt to cheapen the moment - beyond that, I don't feel its my place to weigh in on whether that moment was necessary or gratuitous, as its a show largely about black characters, by black creators.

I just mention it in case anyone interested in checking out the show wouldn't want to be caught offguard by that, and to express that despite it being the first scene, it doesn't appear to be meant as a typical/usual scene for the show. More something that was led with intentionally, to set a certain tone but not to set it up as "this is the kind of scene you should expect to see regularly throughout the show" kind of thing, if that makes sense.

Anyway, for anyone who liked Heroes or wanted to like Heroes but was put off by or soured on it by that show's problems with representation and antiblackness in particular, both onscreen and behind the camera, I would definitely give this a try. I'm really engaged by it and intrigued as to where its going and what its setting up, so....just a heads up if it wasn't on your radar but sounds like something you might like!

[littlesislovesyou]

Oh no I know the reason you kept them to yourself and I'd love for you to keep it that way. It is more special <3 but it also is comforting to know that only you and me know what's in my head. And maybe people who follow you get to see like the 1 percent I leak out in the asks you actually answer from me LOL idk I feel more confident knowing you'll have me as your dirty little secret as you are mine. 🤭🔪

But I would love that thought so much 💞 I'll gladly help you with angles you can't on your own while resisting my primal urges screaming in both of my heads as my eyes can't get enough of you in every shot and angle. And I'd love to be the hand wrapped around your throat in pictures or perhaps the one holding the knife...driving everyone else crazy and making them wish they were me in that moment <3333 then when we're done making content I'm gonna make you cry and scream my name to the roof and the poor neighbors outside as I breed and fuck you til you can't walk~ Unleashing all of my desires on you once the job well done is over...

Fuckkkkk in that sense you have so much control over me. I'm just a pawn in your game of chess that yearns for and can't stop thinking about you. But you can have me anytime you want and turn me into something more. Promoting me further so I can have you all to myself. But I'd always be wrapped around your little finger and I'd never forget you even if I wanted to try...every relationship or sexual encounter just reminds me that I want you. Need youuu 🥵 no one would ever compare <3333

I think you described us both in simple words

"I could fix her but honestly whatever the fuck is wrong with her is way hotter" 😭 but tysmmmm,your reassurance means alot and it's that kindness that leads to brief moments of feeling like I can be vulnerable with you and you won't snap. Won't get mad. You'll just listen and even if you don't understand completely you'd be there and it's enough for me to cry tbh lmaoooo

But yes let's be fucked up, depraved and nasty together~ No one else needs to know or have what we do~ Together 😈💕

Honestly it's the fact that you said that. That you love this and can handle what I have to give that makes me feel like I don't have to hold back. Like I can both hug you and do unspeakably filthy things to you and you'd thank me for it even as I apologize 💕💕

I'm happy you like them so much though thank you. And yes I found your blog and went through the 5 stages of grief of whether or not I should fall into this depraved hole and accept I am into way darker shit than I realized and eventually reached acceptance and stayed. Your responses, personality and concepts really sold me on staying though.

I still can't reblog from here though. You really are my dirty little secret that I can't let people know about but I'll promise to make up for that these asks and attention.

So yes I stalked you for a whole month while debating myself. Like a conflicted being being tempted by the taboo and then the fates decided and I too. Should stay and perhaps have you all for myself 🖤 but sharing you with your followers because hey I'm not evil. The amount of horny older men you've tempted on here...you've gotta take responsibility yk? But something tells me you'd like that...being loaned out and shared by your owner and used like a desperate slut, a needy fuckpet tempting married men from their wives and siblings to fuck their lil sis...have you no shame? But then again...I suppose when I'm with you. I don't have any shame either for liking and getting off to what we do... 😈🖤

Hehe 🫶☺️ I also keep them bc I don’t want anyone else seeing all the nasty and depraved disgustingly hot things you’d like to do to me<333 my eyes only;’) you’re my little secret🖤 you could probably tell me your dirtiest fantasy and it would probably make me wet I won’t even lie<333

Agh yes💕 you would do such great camera work for sure<3 making sure everything looks good, and when your hand wraps around my throat for the picture you’ll be who I’m staring up at🖤🖤🖤 something tells me we’d always be on each other like two animals<3 all the time and I love it🖤🫶 you take after my own kinky heart<3

And ahhh so true;’) also I’m really glad you felt comfortable enough to explore a new side to yourself I won’t even lie some of the things I post I wasn’t into before I made the blog, some of them kinda just developed for me, ahh sorry I don’t wanna ramble but yeah so never feel bad for that🖤 I’m really glad you stayed to enjoy my filthy posts<3

And also how did u like perfectly describe me bc literally I cannot really ever make anyone feel bad about themselves that’s just not in me, I also don’t know why I would get mad at you for being vulnerable, like ever, I’m really glad you feel like you can be!🥺💕

I’d love to just explore your most fucked up fantasies with you;’) 🖤🖤🖤

And agh hey don’t worry about it, I understand honestly🖤🖤 I don’t mind being your secret at all 🫣

And ahhh that’s so hottt hh<3 you’re gonna make me melt 💕 are you my owner in this case?;’) because that’s the only way I’m going to enjoy it~

Having you keep me as your slutty personal pet, would you share me?;’) take photos for me and help me decide which ones to post, which ones you like best<333 ahh

[tanoraqui]

🔪❄️

[ask meme]

Already answered Knife.

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

I know I've said this before, but I really would like someone who has actual experience being a parent and/or having a notably messy relationship with at least one parent to write a fic about Curufin returning to life in Fourth Age Aman and trying to reconcile with Celebrimbor, and then - before he's actually done doing that - Fëanor returns as well so Curufin also has to sort out how he feels and is reacting to that.

I'd like it to be written by someone with more real-life experience in this sort of emotional tangle than I have, because I just...don't have many strong opinions about parenting. Which this story would very much be about, though not exclusively. However, it WOULD need to follow exactly my headcanons for characterization, worldbuilding, and generally the moral dynamics of the cosmology, because god knows that will also come up.

Key characters and other components include:

Curufin has, over the millennia of being dead, resignedly come around to the "less evil would have been done in the breaking of it" position on the Oath. However, he's still very proud and fucking hates apologizing to anyone. He'll do it but he hates it.

He hates it much less when it's apologizing to Celebrimbor, almost not at all. Celebrimbor, however, is very reluctant to believe his father repents of anything except getting caught.

Yantalmandë, Celebrimbor's Vanyarin wife, who is ready to support him either by kicking any unwanted family firmly out the door or by sympathetically talking him through forgiving them, for his own sake if not theirs - whichever the situation requires. One of the most notable heretics in Aman for her theory that morality and ethics can and should exist entirely independently from the dictates of Eru and the Valar but rather be derived from the nature and experience of Arda. She's mildly embarrassed whenever people bring up her philosophical infamy.

(This is, in fact, somewhat the moral of the story: that when you make a living thing, you may raise and guide and advise them, but you fundamentally lose the right to dictate their choices. Children should be independent from their parents and both should be proud of this.)

Curufinwen, their daughter, at least 1,000 years old but vibes as mid-20s, who in family tradition holds her father to be probably the greatest and definitely her favorite person in the world, and who is distinctly more correct in this than the last 3 people in her eponymous lineage. Skeptical of her newly reincarnated family, but willing to give them a chance. Also, superb metallurgist/chemist/explosives expert.

Maltrinbor, Curufin's wife and Celebrimbor's mother, about as willing to forgive Curufin as Celebrimbor is but at a different angle. I still haven't decided whether I want her to be Noldorin (and died in the stormy sea-crossing, or in Dagor Bragollach after the slow eroding of her marriage?) or Teleri (and died at Alqualondë while trying to find her idiot husband and clearly-not-safe child, after walking away from them a decade ago?). Either way, she's a preeminent artist in glass and has been living near her parents near Aulë's mountain, focusing on craft all these millennia since her return, happy to be a mother but avoiding like spiders any royal politics (which Celebrimbor can never quite do.) SO disappointed in Curufin, for not being...better. In literally any way tbh. But especially for never stepping far enough out of his father's shadow to live up to his own potential.

Finrod in the role of frustratingly wise advice-giver, not least in the area of parenting because he's now had 7 children, and, when Curufin cracks and asks him for help, earnest confidant and supporter in this reconciliation. While also playing an extended game which he calls "social rehabilitation" and Curufin and Celegorm both call "publicly humiliating psychological torment." On top of everything else Curufin has to be grateful and/or apologetic to Finrod about, when Celebrimbor returned from Mandos, Finrod immediately took him under his wing and helped him fully recover from his trauma and comfortably re-settle into Valinorian society.

Veryawendë, Finrod's 4th daughter and Celebrimbor's best friend, artistic collaborator, and ally within the family. A superb jewel-smith and -sculptor who actually studied with Nerdanel in order to master form and sense of movement and life. Very ready to bodily kick unwanted parents or uncles out the door on his behalf.

Celegorm, Curufin's usual/former closest confidant, who is very sympathetic to Curufin's plight and of course he also wants to reconcile with his beloved nephew, but he's kind of focussed on reconciling with an entire Vala of the Hunt first so could you maybe stop ranting and help him, Curvo?

Nerdanel absolutely is involved in this, but I think she's trying - maybe by wrestling with herself - to stay out of it, and oblige her children and theirs to solve their own problems which they made.

And of course Fëanor, who comes out of Mandos regretting a great deal...but who is still too prideful to let himself be much diminished by this guilt, and so with all his vigor sets about trying to Fix What He Broke, which sometimes means the world's most undeniable earnest repentant apologies and sometimes means unthinkingly steamrolling everyone and everything in his path.

(Fëanor who never wanted his children to be consumed by his own fire - his own will, his own grief and rages - like kindling for the flame, but who probably didn't always communicate that in word or deed even before the Oath. Fëanor who, accustomed to Bonding Through Craft, tries to connect with his grandson by offering to teach him some techniques which have clearly been lost, and instead only sets off Celebrimbor's latent Annatar-related alarm bells. Fëanor who is overall struggling with many of the same things that Curufin is, and in most ways he's ahead [typical, natural, bitterly surprising] but in some ways he's behind [mind-boggling, earth-shaking, weirdly satisfying in an uncomfortably vengeful way.])

(Vs Curufin who is so angry at and so so so disappointed and betrayed by his father but who has never consciously, and rarely unconsciously, experienced those feelings in that direction before [while alive to remember it] and doesn't really know how to do so, much less how to express it [the answer is 'sobbing while shouting', at least at first]. He's pretty accustomed to feeling them toward himself, though, except he's also very accustomed to ignoring that and/or blaming other people for it and feeling like a victim instead. He never felt it toward his son, not truly; it was just easier for a few years toward the end to include Celebrimbor in the list of people he blamed - but only in his very darkest moments, and it always set off a vicious circle of feeling even worse.)

Oh yeah Finwë definitely needs to be involved in this whole tangle of generations of fatherhood as well. But I have no idea how he fits in, just that he's among the people who all need to be put into a giant hamster ball together and gently shaken until they're all a little healed.

Btw corrollary to the above "you have to be okay with your children doing things you neither plan nor approve of" is "you have to be okay with things you make being viewed and used in ways you neither planned nor approved of." It's not always your right (@Fëanor) and it's not always your responsibility (@Celebrimbor - he's mostly learned the lesson but it still hurts. The recent end of the Third Age brought back how it hurts).

Additional Supporting Cast:

Maedhros: running around playing catch-up on the 3D chess game of Noldorin and Eldarin politics and public perception. (Note: I'm ambivalent as to whether this fic has to take place in a Celechwes-inclusive timeline, but if it is, she gets pregnant shortly before Fëanor's return and that's very thematically relevant.)

Maglor: hasn't entirely recovered from 6,000 years of self-induced Song-filled isolation, has apparently sworn some sort of fealty to Earendil?? No help.

Caranthir: busy trailing after his wife like a repentant puppy until she decided to let him back into her heart. No help.

Ambarussa: one of them, probably Amrod, took up weaving while drifting between Mandos's Halls and Vairë's, and is continuing that apprenticeship while alive again, so they're spending a lot of time with the grandparents.

Mahtan, who is quite near the top of the list of people whom Curufin doesn't want to look in the eye.

The Silmaril which is right over there on the far edge of the continent, he can feel it sometimes...and that's okay. It's where it neds to be, it's in the care of a (distant) (barely counts) kinsman, and more important Maglor is keeping some sort of eye on it. So it's fine. There's nothing he can practically do anyway, not without restarting a war; and that's not an option anymore than charging Angband was.

Huan, best boy. Has also been looking after Celebrimbor since he returned to life, because he's the best uncle in this family.

A wide assortment of OCs, including people who died in Himlad, people who followed Curufin to Doriath and died there, people who followed him to Doriath and survived beyond that, people who stayed with Celebrimbor in Nargothrond, people who were in Eregion and died, people who were in Eregion and survived...

I really want the whole line of Curufinwës to make something together, like, the very first scene is Curufin approaching Celebrimbor not for the first time, but for like the third time and this time he's suggesting a long-term project of some sort, which would give them the opportunity to spend time together in an activity they both enjoy and (used to) both enjoy and are accustomed to doing together. Then that spans the whole story. Idk what it is, though - I do want them to make Maedhros a hand that shoots lasers like Iron Man's glove, but that's not what The Project should be.

CURUFIN HAS TO GET AN EPESSË IN THE END, ONE WHICH HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH FËANOR WHATSOEVER.