#i think i've come a ways in terms of my art since then. good to see i haven't hit a plateau like i thought i did

[fox-guardian]

[ID: A digital drawing of Jonathan Sims sitting on a bed. He is a thin Arab man with brown skin covered in various scars and body hair, and he has long curly black hair with gray streaks and a beard and mustache to match. His hair is tied in a braid hung over his shoulder and is frizzy with loose hairs poking out everywhere. He is wearing a huge blue t-shirt that's slipping off one shoulder and green boxers, and a pale blush colored duvet rests over his thighs. He sits leaning back on one arm, rubbing his cheek against that shoulder as he smiles softly with only one eye slightly open, looking out of frame. His other hand is scratching at his ribs, lifting the shirt out of the way, exposing his stomach. The bed is pink and the color fades upwards into a muted brown gradient. Speech bubbles show Martin and Jon talking. Martin, out of frame, says "Haha, G'morning, sleepyhead!" and a note points to Jon reading "creaky morning voice" as he says "good morning, love" with hearts around the speech bubble. Martin says "O-OH...." and the speech bubble is accompanied with a tiny doodle of his flustered expression. end ID]

~~~~

jon won the eepy poll so have this beautiful man after his first good sleep in the safehouse after years of no rest <3

[magentagalaxies]

having a moment about my gender rn and i'm just like ugggggh @ my brain do we have to. like can we just not

[lackadaisycats]

Hey Tracy! Have you heard about the new Ai called Sora? Apparently it can now create 2D and 3D animations as well as hyper realistic videos. I’ve been getting into animation and trying to improve my art for years since I was 7, but now seeing that anyone can create animation/works in just a mare seconds by typing in a couple words, it’s such a huge slap in the face to people who actually put the time and effort into their works and it’s so discouraging! And it has me worried about what’s going to happen next for artists and many others, as-well. There’s already generated voices, generated works stolen from actual artists, generated music, and now this! It’s just so scary that it’s coming this far. 

Yeah, I've seen it. And yeah, it feels like the universe has taken on a 'fuck you in particular' attitude toward artists the past few years. A lot of damage has already been done, and there are plenty of reasons for concern, but bear in mind that we don't know how this will play out yet. Be astute, be justifiably angry, but don't let despair take over. --------

One would expect that the promo clips that have been dropping lately represent some of the best of the best-looking stuff they've been able to produce. And it's only good-looking on an extremely superficial level. It's still riddled with problems if you spend even a moment observing. And I rather suspect, prior to a whole lot of frustrated iteration, most prompts are still going to get you camera-sickness inducing, wibbly-wobbly nonsense with a side of body horror.

Will the tech ultimately get 'smarter' than that and address the array of typical AI giveaways? Maybe. Probably, even. Does that mean it'll be viable in quite the way it's being marketed, more or less as a human-replacer? Well…

A lot of this is hype, and hype is meant to drive up the perceived value of the tech. Executives will rush to be early adopters without a lot of due diligence or forethought because grabbing it first like a dazzled chimp and holding up like a prize ape-rock makes them look like bleeding-edge tech geniuses in their particular ecosystem. They do this because, in turn, that perceived value may make their company profile and valuations go up too, which makes shareholders short-term happy (the only kind of happy they know). The problem is how much actual functional value will it have? And how long does it last? Much of it is the same routine we were seeing with blockchain a few years ago: number go up. Number go up always! Unrealistic, unsustainable forever-growth must be guaranteed in this economic clime. If you can lay off all of your people and replace them with AI, number goes up big and never stops, right?

I have some doubts. ----------------------

The chips also haven't landed yet with regards to the legality of all of this. Will these adopters ultimately be able to copyright any of this output trained on datasets comprised of stolen work? Can computer-made art even be copyrighted at all? How much of a human touch will be required to make something copyright-able? I don't know yet. Neither do the hype team or the early adopters.

Does that mean the tech will be used but will have to be retrained on the adopter's proprietary data? Yeah, maybe. That'd be a somewhat better outcome, at least. It still means human artists make specific things for the machine to learn from. (Watch out for businesses that use 'ethical' as a buzzword to gloss over how many people they've let go from their jobs, though.)

Will it become industry standard practice to do things this way? Maybe. Will it still require an artist's sensbilities and oversignt to plan and curate and fix the results so that it doesn't come across like pure AI trash? Yeah, I think that's pretty likely.

If it becomes standard practice, will it become samey, and self-referential and ultimately an emblem of doing things the cookie-cutter way instead of enlisting real, human artists? Quite possibly.

If it becomes standard industry practice, will there still be an audience or a demand or a desire for art made by human artists? Yes, almost certainly. With every leap of technology, that has remained the case. ------------------ TL;DR Version:

I'm not saying with any certainty that this AI blitz is a passing fad. I think we're likely to experience a torrential amount of generative art, video, voice, music, programming, and text in the coming years, in fact, and it will probably irrevocably change the layout of the career terrain. But I wouldn't be surprised if it was being overhyped as a business strategy right now. And I don't think the immensity of its volume will ever overcome its inherent emptiness.

What I am certain of is that it will not eliminate the innate human impulse to create. Nor the desire to experience art made by a fellow soul. Keep doing your thing, Anon. It's precious. It's authentic. It will be all the more special because it will have come from you, a human.

[buskingalbatross]

I've been a part of the phandom since I was fourteen back in 2012, but i've only recently deviated from my lurker ways and started being active in this community on tumblr. which I have been enjoying immensely! I'm super confused about something however, and so i'm making a post about it. please help.

often when I see the word "parasocial" used among the dnp audience, I've noticed that it's used with really negative connotations. Or with the implication that having a parasocial relationship is inherently bad and terrible. today, for instance, I've seen the term parasocial likened directly to "creepy."

I'd like to ask why that is-what has led to the perception of a parasocial relationship in this fandom as one that is intrinsically invasive and creepy. And I'd like also to put forth my own thoughts on why I think it's unhelpful and incorrect that we use this term to be a near synonym for creepy.

first, a definition. I'm turning to Hank Green for this, as he succinctly sums up what a parasocial relationship is in this vlogbrothers video (a recommended watch). He says a parasocial relationship forms "when the parts of your brain that are designed to have a social relationship between you and another person are used to have a relationship with a person who does not know who you are or, sometimes, cannot know who you are... because they're Huckleberry Finn."

At its most basic, a parasocial relationship is a relationship between you and someone fictional or nonfictional who doesn't know who you are. Hank goes on to say, importantly! that parasocial relationships have been happening since the beginning of time. People have been fans of famous or talented people since time immemorial, people have cared for fictional people since the first stories were told among humans.

~ ✌🏻continued below✌🏻 ~

Similarly, in one of his Am I The Hole videos, Phil says that becoming obsessed with things is normal. "People hyperfixate on stuff. It's fine." We all do it.

In many ways, parasocial relationships are as natural as myriad other forms of human bonds. Humans can't help but connect to each other. To other living and even non-living things. Bonding and connecting and forming communities is what we do. And because of that, I think it's a disservice to oneself be ashamed of being in a parasocial relationship, or to use parasocial as a term to serve as a stand in for a disrespectful fan of someone. I think it fosters a sense of guilt where there shouldn't necessarily be any, especially if you as a viewer of Dan and Phil are respecting the boundaries they have set. You are doing something so normal! So human! You are finding support and comfort and empowerment and motivation and creativity and any number of other things from other people.

There is great joy and great good that can come from parasocial relationships. Obviously! Think of Phil's birthday stream, the feelings you experienced when the lights came on in the theater after TATINOF, all the laughs (among other things) Dan and Phil have gotten from our memes and art.

And it's important to consider the other side of this as well. Dan and Phil also have a parasocial relationship with us. It's different, of course, but they do think of us, make decisions because of us, without truly knowing us. At different points in time maybe they know the loudest of us, a few individuals, but for the most part they do not know who we are. They don't know who you are. But they do think about you. They think about what ties us together, our queerness, our beliefs about the world, the internet, our status as socially awkward and or mentally ill nerds etc. They think about how certain videos or projects or merch will be received. All creators are in a relationship with their audience. And it is often a parasocial one.

Basically i find myself exasperated with stumbling over the word 'parasocial' in this fandom. I want to have the information and know the truth and add my own thoughts! Maybe parasocial is used by other people elsewhere on the internet to mean something bad, but my thesis is this: it's not a bad word. It's a descriptor. And it's a normal thing. Those people are wrong. You shouldn't feel bad about being in a parasocial relationship with Dan and Phil! You should call that relationship what it is with pride! And do as much good with it as you can.

conclusion: talk to me about this! What is your perspective, what am I missing? let me know please. would be happy to talk about this with anyone.

(ok what do i do now do i thank you for reading? i don't do this. text post over.)

[stirringwinds]

While I feel that hws France is hard to portray I do wonder what headcanons you have for him. Care to tell a few that come to mind?

a lot of my headcanons of francis/françois are from the british imperial + sea/east asian perspective, so with that in mind, these are some thoughts i've had:

a. françois' strengths are that he can be very charming and good at putting people at ease. he is somebody, if you ran into him somewhere, just comes off as a really interesting person. he can talk for ages about his passion for philosophy, art, literature, science and cooking without it getting boring to the listener.

b. he can be a really good lover too and is that sort of person who considers it a point of pride to make his partners enjoy his company. the sort of person who will make dinner and probably also a good breakfast for you. but one of his flaws is that he can also be pretty self-centred at times, and sometimes he uses his charisma to get out of things or simply dodge issues in his personal relationships.

c. françois, much like arthur, is in the Bad Parent club vis a vis matthew in the 17—18th centuries. where they differ however, is i feel that arthur was controlling but more...present, whereas françois was more...dismissive. matthew would get letters from arthur instructing him to do this and that, which for matthew at least acknowledged him, whereas françois might just not even write to him much at all, especially after matthew came under arthur's control.

d. françois really clicked with alfred during the revolutionary war. it helped that alfred was punching arthur in the dick, but i think that françois for all his flaws, genuinely possesses a somewhat more idealistic streak (than say, arthur imo) so that gelled well with alfred spouting all kinds of enlightenment thoughts (especially since he was also reading french writers like Montesquieu).

e. françois and lien (vietnam) have a complicated (to say the least) relationship due to the history of french imperialism over vietnam; i see francis being much younger than her (she and yao are peers in age!), so lien fitted him very much into her prior experience as an older female nation being forced to deal with 'boys playing at being empires'. lien probably shot him in the face at least once during the first indochina war, that tried to re-establish colonial rule over vietnam in the 1950s. however, i do think they can talk more cordially in more recent decades, with normalisation of ties. cooking is perhaps one topic that is a common interest—vietnamese banh mi is a kind of sandwich originating from french baguettes that incorporates local ingredients, and it's a really tasty and popular streetfood. there's also a big french-vietnamese population in paris today.

f. kiku was absolutely not impressed by monet's la japonaise, nor 'madame chrysanthème', the wildly racist and orientalist mess that Madame Butterfly was based on. it was exoticising, not flattering to him—he was however, more amenable to those of françois' artists that incorporated japanese artistic techniques in more genuine ways, or with françois' own view of aesthetics and his knowledge and interest in engineering.

g. yao, much like kiku later, was someone françois was very interested in culturally—as seen from the boom in chinoiserie when trade with china began back in the 17th century. i think french is probably one of the first european languages yao learns (besides portuguese). it's a fairly functional trading relationship—until of course, french imperialist interests began expanding in yao's sphere of influence and the opium wars.

h. i'm a fruk fan so naturally i think his love-hate relationship with arthur is one of his most significant r/ships—arthur has been a neighbour, friend, enemy, lover and everything in between. but! scotfra is another very, very long-term relationship important to him (auld alliance!). also on an EU level well, there's him and ludwig too.

i. naturally, he's also fairly fashionable, and i feel like he'll always eye himself critically even if he's going out casually, compared to way i can see arthur being fairly chill about strolling out in that questionable, ill-fitting acid green christmas sweater alfred sent him as a joke once. i also think françois probably smokes a fair bit, compared to how arthur's gotten a kick in the arse to cut back after WWII. and nowadays, he'll often just be relaxing with a cigarette on the balcony of his apartment with a book, or enjoying a day out in one of his museums.

[rainy-astrology]

ATEEZ San Birth Chart Analysis

Based on my opinion and observations. Not a professional astrologer. May change later.

July 10th, 1999

Jinju, South Korea

10:08 AM

☀️♋️, 🌙♊️, ⬆️♍️

Sun in 11th shows a drive and ambition towards his future dreams and goals. San has always wanted to be a singer since he was young and has worked very hard to achieve his dream. He has improved his performance and vocal skills immensely over the years, often being the most eye catching member for many people who aren't ATINYs.

Mercury Leo in 11th shows a preference for like minded people. San seems to really enjoy the company of others - seems considerate of others feelings and cares to be on good terms with people. He has a natural charm and sweetness about him.

Moon in 9th also adds onto his ambitiousness - he truly seems to want to make a great influence on the world and be successful. Especially as a Virgo rising...I've never seen a lazy Virgo placement, they always work so hard for they want. He's very strongly opinionated, all of his beliefs come from the heart.

Saturn is also in 9th, which solidifies his strong beliefs/opnions. Saturn here puts a heavy focus on building future career and life. He makes sure to implement a sense of strictness and discipline into his routine.

Saturn trine ASC can make him appear serious and quiet. Physically, it can give people sharp features (Saturn and prominent bone structure), which San definitely has: sharp cheekbones and jaw, nose and eyes, prominent brow bones. Angular brow shapes suit him the best too (at least imo - it looks more cohesive with the rest of his features compared to straight brows). This is also likely why many people may find him intimidating at first or think he's older than his real age.

Mars Scorpio in 2nd is such a possessive and protective placement. It also creates an incredibly hardworking individual who always goes for whatever they want with no limit. San may be especially inclined to working hard towards his finances and can be particular about things he owns (iirc he has a black card but also won't bother to buy new things sometimes).

Jupiter in 8th...this could be about being good with finances, it is a priority for him (could obtain wealth from someone else maybe). This could also be about transformation of himself as 8th house is "death" and Jupiter is expansion. San seems to focus a lot on being authentic and true to himself, so it would not be too surprising if it is about him constantly trying to improve his character for the better. Maybe he has gone through a lot of life changing experiences or will be/is going through them.

Venus Leo in 12th is interesting, especially since Venus squares Moon and Pluto too. He's certainly loyal and devoted to those he loves (Leo's loyalty + Pluto's possessiveness). In 12th though, perhaps San is shy at first? Or at least very selective. It seems once he trusts/loves a person though, he really clings onto them (just look at the way he's glued to the other members and how he always says Yeosang is his. Venus square pluto behavior). Moon square Venus can add onto his attached and affectionate nature (though, many Leo venuses are just affectionate in general)

Uranus and Neptune in 5th makes for a creative and expressive individual. San clearly loves the arts and always expresses his passion in every performance. He may be a bit strange and unconventional, but I think that's just an artist thing in general

Pluto in 3rd explains his thoughtfulness so much! San is a little silly at times, but he seems to have a very deep side to him due to this placement. You can especially see it in the way he talks/writes in his letters to the members and fans - he writes in a way that pulls at heart strings (even I've gotten emotional at one of his letters and I'm not the type to get soft hearted so easily) and makes people reflect. It also explains his strong beliefs and opinions - he's such an advocate for authenticity. Pluto in 3rd folks have a very specific way of talking and thinking that makes them stand out.

Chiron in 3rd may make him feel insecure about the way he talks and thinks though - maybe San is going or has gone through a period of feeling misunderstood by others. A lot of Chiron in 3rd ppl do. Although he does like spending time with others, I think he may accidentally drive people away by oversharing and/or talking too much...He seems a bit intense and clingy, which may be overwhelming for others. Communication and self esteem is a struggle for many with this placement.

Being a Virgo rising, he may appear quiet and serious, observant and disciplined. Hard working with high standards. Pluto and Saturn aspect his ASC so it adds onto the natural stern energy he has.

North Node Leo in 11th is focused on building community, contributing to groups, and celebrating the individualities of others. I think he is doing a pretty good job at this as he's very encouraging and kind to others and is always advocating for people to simply be themselves.

Gemini MC can appear sociable, curious, and optimistic. San is a pretty positive person, I don't think I've seen him be negative to himself or others much...He always seem to be active on socials as he talks to ATINYs a lot. ATEEZ considered him one of the more talkative members in the group too.

___

Other Analysis:

MBTI | Enneagram

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Masterlist

___

[celluloidbroomcloset]

People in other fandom are criticising the 1st gentlebeard kiss again, and I think we need to discuss how this is the result of oversexualation in queer media

I’m assuming that other fandom refers to the Canyon? I’ve mostly either blocked or been blocked by them, it seems, which is perfectly fine by me. They don’t want to see me and I don’t want to see them.

I’ve written, as have others, about how there’s a clear progression to those kisses, from the very tentative sweetness of the first and the absolute confidence of the last. In that beach scene, Ed can barely get out what he wants to say, and Stede doesn't immediately clock what it means (because he's dealing with that initial emotion of "I make...you...happy?"). I’m not sure what was wanted with the first kiss? Like, full-on snog? How would that make sense to either of those characters at that point? It might even have looked like assault, since Stede is obviously surprised and not quite expecting it. The fact that it is gentle and unsure is part of their relationship - they’re figuring out who they are to each other, and Ed especially is being so careful about how he does it.

In terms of oversexualization generally...I'm not a queer media scholar or critic, though I've done work with queer theory and I know a lot of Hollywood history. So much of mainstream queer media was initially about subtext and suffering - characters that were typed as queer without being made explicitly so (because they literally couldn't), stories that treated queerness as a mental illness or that ended in death and destruction. So there's been a natural pushback against all that, often outside the mainstream and then more into the mainstream now. I think there was also a desire to shock the straight world, hence things like John Waters's films, Rocky Horror, etc. (not knocking these - I fuckin' love 'em), which are also in conversation with pornography.

With Our Flag Means Death and a handful of other shows and films (Good Omens, A League of Their Own, Heartstopper, etc.) there's been major movement forward, in part because there are more queer writers/artists/creators getting a say in mainstream texts. But there's still that fear of assimilation - because mainstream. So there's a cadre that will demand that if it's queer, it's gotta be explicit. It's gotta shock the straights. Which leads, eventually, to a sanding away of complicated emotions and nuance and not allowing characters or plots to progress in an organic way. There has to be space for sexualization if it's natural to the story, but it can't be forced.

I would absolutely have been upset if all we ever got was that beach kiss, and all we ever saw was Ed and Stede barely kissing each other. That wouldn't have made sense to the story that was being told. I even remember messaging my friend after "Curse of the Seafaring Life" that I was glad they "finally got a proper kiss." And looking back, even then, I was pretty much thinking that that's all we were gonna get, because I've been so conditioned to just expect crumbs in mainstream media. (Also, like, I remember very well how Ellen lost her sitcom when she came out, how people had an absolute fit about Will & Grace featuring a nonromantic same-sex kiss, and how all the interviews around Brokeback Mountain were along the lines of "how terribly uncomfortable was it to kiss a dude?!" So the idea of two straight actors maybe possibly not being grossed out by kissing each other is relatively new, in terms of media history.)

I think some of this is a desire for all queer media to be all things. That if any show doesn’t do ALL THE THINGS, then it is bad and problematic. And that’s just not the nature of art. It would be awful if they tried to do all the things. It wouldn’t work. But that's also a result of having so little explicitly queer stuff, especially from mainstream shows/films, that when something like OFMD or Good Omens comes along, it gets picked apart and people are upset that it didn't do all the things. The more queer stories there are, the less we'll have to depend on single works and the less infighting there will be.

Well, there, I wrote way too much. This is all very complicated and I'm not trying to pretend that it's easy to distill down or that I'm 100% right here. I'd be happy to hear other opinions or caveats (that are not "no, I love Izzy, therefore you're wrong").

[iraprince]

Absolutely love the Infodump on Cookie she's so good. however!! I remember you made a trio of characters for this game and were torn about which one to play, then decided the other two could be his attendants.

How are those two, what are they up to?? Have you done much with them in the game so far? (And even if not, wanna give us some tastey information about 'em?)

💜

oooh yes! those two are sir velvet the unsmiling (it/she), and damned-if-i-do/dandy (he/they). let's pull up their art (esp now that i have crispy clean new scans!!! i think i have only ever posted this art as shitty phone pics prior to this)

ANYWAY. it turns out that even though attendants are a built-in part of the noble sweetheart playbook (cookie's title) and you're SUPPOSED to be using them... for me in practice, when i'm actually playing the game, i just keep totally forgetting lmfao!!!! :') rping with my other party members and chasing quests and stuff is so engaging that my brain is totally booked with just being cookie, let alone two additional npcs, so sadly dandy and velvet have not gotten a ton of screentime in the current campaign

BUT that really just makes me eager to one day play them properly in a different campaign, whether that's them each taking their turn as player characters like was originally intended, or when i'm GMing a campaign of my own (i'm trying to write up something for my friends, but i have no idea when it's actually gonna happen bc i'm so busy rip... but when i do, cookie and her attendants will def be npcs)

i honestly don't have MUCH i can say abt them, bc since i haven't played them much i also havent developed them much... i suppose i can give summaries tho!

in terms of vibes velvet is very much like, "guy who is brooding so hard that it stops being mysterious or having any gravity at all and is mostly just making people wonder if she's like? okay?????" like there is only so long you can spend with your back to the rest of the group clenching your fist and muttering to yourself before people just start kind of glossing over it and being like "oh haha that's CLASSIC sir velvet the unsmiling!!!"... mix this with a heady dose of "[nasal voice] UM, you forgot to collect the homework" and somehow you have created a creature ideal for wrangling cookie's effusive elaborate scatterbrained whims, somehow, most of the time. velvet is really similar to a different Brooding Goth Knight character i have wherein my formula is "make a character who looks extremely fucking sicknasty badass, then never ever ever stop making fun of them ever"

dandy is cookie's quartermaster, and so unlike velvet (who's usually assumed to be traveling around with cookie, even if i am constantly forgetting to roleplay that it's doing that) he mostly chills at chateau gorgeous looking after his liege's affairs and making sure the ppl who live there are fed + sheltered + generally taken care of. they are pretty much velvet's exact opposite in terms of temperament; EVERYTHING gets velvet's hackles up, NOTHING phases dandy. i need to be careful bc i am starting to arbitrarily ship them just from typing this. anyway, dandy is largely non-verbal; they're able to speak if really necessary, but they would just rather not, and if there's really no way around it they'd rather just sidle over to cookie and whisper it to her, and then let her communicate whatever they want to say to the rest of the group on their behalf; if cookie's not around, you're just gonna have to figure out how to communicate w him otherwise. which always works out fine bc dandy is very patient and used to getting along in silence!

that's about all i've got rn... i will def post it here if i come up with or draw anything else that's fun tho :) ty for the ask!

[utilitycaster]

🔥 each member of vox machina

Vax: really the sadboy narrative for Liam has always been stupid but it's egregiously bad that it started with Vax, who is like, sad for maybe a fifth of the episodes and largely because Liam O'Brien's actual mother was dying, like, with all due respect what the actual fuck, fandom.

Vex: I am the founding and probably only member of the "Vex is my favorite character and also I am 100% cool with Colville's depiction of her." The generosity she shows even very early on in C1 is still a generosity borne of some degree of security - they have a keep by then - and I also just don't think you have to like a character to write them fairly. Granted it's been a minute since I read early VMO but nothing stood out to me as out of line with my understanding of Vex.

Pike: repeating myself once again but I like Pike a lot and wish we could have seen more, but because we didn't, people who say she's their favorite in C1 do tend to turn me off in that I feel they're looking for a relatively flat and widely praised character to project onto rather than a character who goes through more messy development.

Grog: I think he's often underestimated and I was guilty of doing so myself, to be honest, until I saw Travis play more and until I personally got better at D&D. Also I still maintain that playing INT 6 sensitively and well is infinitely harder than playing INT 16, all things considered, and this is yet another reason why people should play high INT more often.

Scanlan: Also underestimated; I do understand being turned off by the whole extremely horny playboy thing but as I've said before Bard's Lament is a major litmus test for me: if you think Scanlan is completely at fault here, you are wrong, and if you think he's not partially at fault, you are also wrong.

Tary: I genuinely love him and think he's a great character and one of Sam's best, but while his character arc is strong the Taryon Darrington Arc of the VM Campaign, through no fault of his own (and partly bc I personally think D&D Hell, especially pre-Descent Into Avernus publication, is kind of boring), is one of the weakest parts of the campaign because it's kind of a grab bag of loose ends. With that said I would happily watch more Darrington Brigade-one shots.

Percy: Percy is also generally a litmus test in that it's like. Is he a good person? Eventually I believe he becomes one, and even before that I think he's very sympathetic and deeply traumatized and like, 24, so I get it, but also, who the fuck cares. This ties into the Essek and the Ashton opinions and all kinds of other stuff but why are people so invested in fucking absolving their blorbo of all sins? I want someone who's lived enough of a life to have done some heinous shit because that's fun and interesting and it's pretend and also because then they can have a rewarding character arc by either working towards redemption or coming to terms with who they are or spiraling into tragedy.

Keyleth: I like Keyleth a lot but I am, as this post indicates, far more sympathetic to Vex, and so while I do think Keyleth is a fairly good person she is also extremely sheltered and naive and terrified of doing the wrong thing and I would have, like Vex, wanted to scream at her half the time were I just a random NPC wandering about the campaign. On the other hand C3-era Keyleth? fantastic no notes she has grown up in such an interesting way.

Tiberius: I think we, and by we I mean people capable of separating the art from the artist, can recognize that his concept actually fucking slapped and unfortunately he was played by someone who absolutely sucked in a myriad of ways. I would love to see the alternate universe in which the same general concept (prodigy sorcerer from Draconia who is full of themself) had to face not just the destruction of their civilization but the realization that they were taking advantage of the Ravenites and while they did not deserve to be killed by Vorugal, had done nothing to justify aid from those they had subjugated either. Like, the alternate world in which one of the current cast members or like, a close friend of the main cast (Ashly, Erika, Mary Elizabeth) played this is one I'd love to see.

[livyjh]

Temptation ch.7

Co-written with @fhatbhabie

No outbreak!Dbf!Joel x Fem!Plus size!Reader

Series Masterlist

Rating: EXPLICIT 18+

Summary: After breaking things off with your toxic boyfriend, you move back home with your dad. His best friend and neighbor, Joel Miller, takes an interest in you. But you’re the one who has to convince him to make the first move.

Chapter warnings: use of y/n, mention of social media, someone runs into an ex, reader feels bad about herself, dirty talk, smuuut, unprotected p in v (don’t do this), brat tamer!Joel, gendered terms used toward reader, rough oral sex (m receiving), daddy kink (duh), sort of public sex???, mirror sex, choking, fight, making up.

Divider art by: @saradika

“Sarah, I need your opinion on something.” You said as you walked into her room. “Have you seen these like pheromone perfumes on Tiktok?”

“Oh my god yes! Been wanting to try it out.”

“Let's fucking do it.” You pulled up the website on your phone and quickly order 2 bottles.

“Wait… who are you gonna use it for?” You ask.

“I've been kinda seeing this guy at school for a while and I think it's serious. We've got our 5th date in about a week so you know what that means.”

“Ahhh I do. Well hopefully it'll get here before your date.”

Within 7 days you received a small box in your mailbox and quickly ran over to Joel's.

“Sarah!!” You squealed as you ran to her bedroom. “Look what's here!”

“Yes!!” She takes the box and quickly opens it pulling out 2 roller ball perfumes. She opened one and put it up to her nose. “I mean… it smells good but like, it smells the same as any other perfume.”

“Aww...” you pout. “Well that was a waste…”

“I'll still wear it on my date tonight. Maybe it affects men differently?”

“Fingers crossed I didn't just waste $40.” You said, making Sarah laugh.

“Whatcha got there girls?” Joel said making you and Sarah jump.

“I told Y/N about my date and she ordered me some perfume for tonight. Just got here in time.” Sarah said smiling innocently at Joel.

He laughed and rolled his eyes playfully at her. “Speaking of date… since Sarah's gonna be out why don't we go on a date?” Joel asked, looking at you.

“We'd have to go out of town honey.” You felt Sarah elbow you on the side making a light bulb go off in your head. Date out of town means getting a hotel room, and getting a hotel room means wild monkey sex.

“Sarah you can manage the house by yourself right?” Joel asked.

“Of course, dad. No worries here.”

**

Later that afternoon you walked out of your room with an overnight bag and grabbed your keys and purse.

“Where you off to?” Your dad asked.

“Couple of girlfriends are throwing a sleepover.”

“You never mentioned a sleepover.”

“Yeah but I wasn't sure if I was working this weekend and I'm not so I decided to join last minute.” What a good liar.

“Okay, just be safe.”

“Will do, dad.” You walked out of the house and saw Joel leaning on the hood of your car with his overnight bag and you tossed him the keys. You tossed both of your bags in the back and sat upfront. Joel got in and drove off. You felt your phone buzz and saw Sarah had texted you.

Sarah: wear a condom ;)

You: haha you too <3

About an hour later you ended up in San Antonio. Joel pulled into this beautiful hotel and opened the door for you.

“What a gentleman.” You teased. He wrapped his arm around your waist and walked you in. Not long after, you got into the elevator and went up to the room. Walking into the room it felt like a dream come to life. There was a beautiful king sized bed in the middle of the room that faced out across the city skyline.

“Jesus, Joel... you went all out.”

“Well, I realized we've never really been on an official date so I had to make it special.” He kissed your temple and pulled you close.

“What do you have planned first?” You asked.

“Dinner in about an hour? That enough time to get ready?”

“Plenty.” You pecked his lips and grabbed your bag, making your way to the bathroom.

You took a quick shower and tossed your hair up into a neat bun, leaving your neck exposed. You slipped on a short, dark red dress that accented your body beautifully. You applied mascara and lipstick and looked over yourself in the mirror and walked out of the bathroom, locking eyes with Joel. He was in a black button up shirt with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His shirt was tucked into a pair of khakis and dress shoes, with his gray curls slicked back. Not gonna lie, just looking at him dressed up made your panties get soaked.

“Must be a fancy place.” You hum.

“Only the best for you, darlin’...”

After a short drive Joel pulled in front of the restaurant. It was so damn fancy, the name of the restaurant was hard to pronounce.

“Let me go check and see if the table is ready, I'll be back.” He kissed your cheek and got out of the car, making his way inside. You pulled your phone out of your purse and heard something drop onto the floorboard of your car. You leaned down and saw it was the pheromone perfume.

“Forgot about you...” you muttered to yourself. “Here goes nothin’.” You rolled some on both sides of your neck right under your ears and a little on your wrists and your ankles, just ‘cause Joel tends to like your ankles around his head. Sarah wasn't wrong, it smelled good but just like any other perfume.

Joel walked back out and jumped into the car. “They said about another half hour.”

“Okay honey, we can wait.” He grabbed your hand and pulled it close to his nose. He started sniffing up your arm and right to the spot under your ear where you put the perfume on. You swore you could hear him groan.

“Fuck, you smell so fuckin good…” he muttered against your skin, making you giggle.

“Thank you, baby.” Thank you Tiktok.

You walked into the restaurant with Joel and sat at the table. You flipped through the menu and muttered.

“What was that darlin?”

“Don't even know what half of this stuff even is…” you said giggling.

“First time being wined and dined?” A woman said as she aproched the table. She was skinny… like the skinny every girl wants to be; no tummy, big boobs and big butt. She had long blonde hair and looked about Joel's age.

“Crystal?” He said as he stood up and pulled her into a hug.

“Joel Miller! Who would have thought I'd see you here on a date.” She said, laughing. Fuck… she had a perfect laugh and perfect teeth too. She turned to you and smiled, holding out her hand.

“Don't mean to be rude. I’m Crystal, an old friend of Joel's.”

“Y/N, I'm his girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend? Wow. Took me years to break him out of his shell and only once did I hear the L word. But don't worry you got yourself a good man sweetie.” She smiled and gave Joel one more hug before she walked away.

“Ex-girlfriend?” You asked, looking back down at the menu.

“We used to hook up. Years ago.”

“Ah. I see.” You said coldly. He grabbed your hand and placed a small kiss on your wrist.

“Nothing compared to you.” He said, making you smile. Couldn't stay mad at him forever. It was her loss.

After you both finished your meals you convinced Joel to order the one thing you've been looking forward to since you got here; chocolate covered strawberries.

“Don't understand the fuss of fruit dipped in chocolate.”

“Because you've never tried them. Here.” you grabbed a strawberry and held it up to his mouth. He took a bite causing strawberry juice to run down his lips and down your hand.

“Okay, that's pretty good…” he said as he ate what he had in his mouth.

“Told you. Gotta expand your taste palette.” You wiped his bottom lip with your thumb and unexpectedly he grabbed your wrist and took your thumb in his mouth. He ran his tongue down, licking up all the juice that was left behind, making you whimper.

“Taste and smell good.” he smirked

“Baby, you have no idea.” You winked at him.

After what felt like forever (well at least it did for Joel) you walked back into the hotel room and kicked off your heels and tossed your purse and phone on the small dresser under the TV. Joel quickly stripped down and picked you up and tossed you on the bed.

“Can't be smellin that damn good while we're out in public darlin… you know how many times I wanted to sit you on that table’n fuck you in front of everybody?”

“Why didn't you?” You teased.

“You woulda liked that wouldn't you?” He quickly unzipped your dress and tossed it to the corner of the room. He looped his fingers around your panties and slipped them off making you gasp at the cool air hitting your wet core.

“Look at that… already fuckin soaked...” he wasted no time and slid right into you making you ball the sheets into your fists. He always warmed you up but tonight he couldn't wait any longer. You felt his girth stretch you out blissfully, making both of you groan.

“Fucking hell, Joel.” You moaned out.

“That’a girl. Takin’ my cock so fuckin’ beautifully.” He fastened his pace as he grabbed your ankles and rested both of them on his shoulders.

You clenched around him, anxious to see what he would say when he would catch a whiff on your ankles. He turned his head and kissed the inside of your calf and made his way down to your ankle making him chuckle at the smell.

“Filthy fuckin’ girl. You know how much I like having you like this...” he grabbed your legs and pushed them far up to where you were the one with your ankles on each side of your head.

His thrusts got more brutal and in the new position he had you in made you feel everything.

You moaned out a string of curses only making Joel be even more brutal. He felt you tighten around him letting him know you were close. He quickly pulled out of you making you whine at the empty feeling.

“Joel!” you yelped.

He wrapped his hand around your neck and pulled you up close to his face. “Don't be a brat.” he spat out.

“I was close.” You whined again. He tightened his grip on your neck a little more and pulled you off the bed pushing you down to your knees.

“Open.” He said. You didn't want to give in, you were having way too much fun, so you shook your head “no” making his eyes turn dark.

“I said…” he lets go of your neck and grips onto your jaw tight, making you whimper. “Open your fuckin’ mouth.”

You looked up at him and opened your mouth, sticking your tongue out. His hand moved to the back of your head as he wrapped your hair around his fist. He leaned down and spit on your tongue. You quickly swallowed and opened your mouth back up again, just begging for more.

He tapped his tip on your tongue, making the precum drop in your mouth. He put his other hand on the back of your head and pushed you all the way down his length, making you gag. You tried pushing back a little to get some air but he was too strong.

“Breathe through your nose, girl. Don't act like you've never choked on my cock before.” He started moving your head up and down his length, each time his tip hitting the back of your throat, making you gag, making tears roll down your cheeks.

Joel pulled you off his dick by your hair with a string of saliva still connecting your lips with his tip. You looked up at him, breathing heavy with your eyes all puffy, mascara streaks on your cheeks and your lips swollen.

“You done being a brat?” He asked as he wiped the corner of your mouth. You take his thumb into your mouth and nod. He pulled his thumb out, making a small *pop* sound.

“Yes daddy… I'll be good.” You muttered, still trying to catch your breath and clearing the sticky precum that was stuck in the back of your throat.

“Good girl. Up.” He demanded. You quickly got up and he wrapped your legs around his waist. He walked over and opened the sliding door, walking both of you out on the balcony.

“Joel.” You breathe.

He pressed your back against the railing and wrapped his hand around your neck again. “Want you to be real good for me darlin’ and listen. I want you to be loud. Want the whole fuckin’ city to hear you screaming my name.”

“Y- Yes daddy…”

“Good girl...” he lined himself up to your entrance and slammed back into you, making you yelp. He wrapped his other arm around your lower back and started pounding into you. You dug your nails into his shoulders, trying to keep yourself up on him. He thrusted into you brutally, making you scream his name over and over and over… no doubt everyone in the rooms connected to yours heard you.

“Music to my fuckin’ ears.” He said as he gripped your neck tighter.

“Can't no one fuck this pussy like me, baby doll. Fucking remember that.” He grunted.

“Yes, Joel, fuck yes!!!” you cried out, tossing your head back with your eyes closed, making Joel start sucking on your neck like a damn vampire. You opened your eyes and felt tears stream down your face.

“Takin’ my cock so fucking well, doll...” Joel groans into your neck. You tried to respond but all that came out was mumbling nonsense.

“Look at you... so fucked out you can't even talk right.” He saw the tears drying on your cheeks and chuckles. “Cryin’ over daddy's cock aren't you?”

You tried responding again but the only thing that came out was his name. He moves both his hands to your ass and walks you back inside. He walked you over into the bathroom and sets you down, bending you over the sink. He grabs your hair and pulls your head up making you look in the mirror. He wasn't wrong. You looked so fucked out you didn't recognize yourself.

“Eyes on me the entire time. If you don't listen, you don't get to cum.” He slides back into you, making you groan, missing the feeling of him even though it was only a minute. You kept eye contact through the mirror but you couldn't help but glance at your own face. Eyes all puffy cheeks full of mascara stains and a red handprint on your neck along with a few hickeys. He wrapped his hand around your neck again and pulled you close so now your back was touching his chest, making the tip of his cock hit that beautiful sweet spot.

“God fuck, Joel, I’m gonna fucking cum!!” You screamed out.

“That's right baby doll… milk my fucking cock with that delicious pussy.” He groaned in your ear. You felt your eyes roll to the back of your head as you released your juices all over him. His thrusts became more sloppy the more tight you got around him.

“Good fucking girl. Gimmie one more.” he wrapped his hand around and rubbed your clit roughly making your vision blur.

“Sh- Shit!!” You felt your legs wobble as a stream of hot cum squirted out of your cunt, making Joel groan and fill you with his hot sticky seed. You felt your walls milking him, making sure every last drop was safe inside you. You rested your head on his shoulder, trying to regain feeling in your legs and trying to get your breathing back to normal.

“Fuck...” he groaned. “I swear to God your pussy is so fucking magical darlin’..”

You chuckled at him. He slowly slid out of you and sat you up on the counter. You wrapped your legs around him and pulled him into a kiss.

“I love you…” he muttered on your lips.

“I love you too Joel…”

**

The next morning you woke up and found yourself alone in bed. You grabbed your phone and texted Joel.

You: where are you baby?

Joel: downstairs grabbing breakfast. Get dressed and I’ll wait for you darlin.

You got dressed and made your way down to the lobby. You looked around and saw Joel sitting at a table with Crystal, the woman from last night. You got a little closer so you could hear what they were saying but not too close to where they could see you.

“Joel… I miss us.” She said.

“Crystal-” he began.

“I heard you and your little play toy last night fucking like rabbits on the balcony. Reminded me of how you used to fuck me. Tell you the truth no one's made me feel the way you did, Joel.” She said as she rubbed her hand up and down his bicep.

“What the fuck…” you muttered. You felt your heart drop to the pit of your stomach. You quickly went back up to the room and started packing your things. Not long after Joel walked in and found you sitting on the bed, staring out the window.

“Darlin’? I was waiting on you.”

“Oh… sorry I wasn't feeling good so I went back to sleep. Just woke up.” you stood up and grabbed your bag. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah… let's go.”

The entire car ride you stared out the window and didn't say a word. Joel tried starting a conversation but you just replied with either “Mhm” or “Yeah.”

He pulled into your drive way and noticed your dad wasn't home.

“Wanna come to my place? Maybe we can sleep some more.” he said

“No m’fine.” you took your keys from him and walked into your house locking the door behind you feeling tears roll down your cheeks.

**

It had been a few days since you spoke to Joel. You’d come home from work and would see him outside staring at you waiting for you to come over and kiss him but you just waved at him and went inside. You did that every day. Until he got sick of it.

You were sitting in the living room when your phone went off right next to you.

Joel: meet me at my house. Now.

You sighed and slipped your shoes on and made your way over. You only knocked on the door once and he opened it, pulling you in.

“What the hell, Joel? Let me go.”

“What's wrong with you?” He asked.

“I don't know what you mean…”

“You haven't said more than 2 words to me since last weekend. I thought we had a great time together.”

“We did Joel.”

“Then what's fucking going on with you??”

“You and fucking Crystal!” You yelled out, leaving Joel speechless. “I saw you talking to her in the lobby the morning we left. She was talking about how much she missed you and how no man can make her feel the same way you did.”

“Y/N…”

“I don't blame you, you know. She's pretty and skinny. She must be a good lay since you fucking hugged her. Oh and she's not 30 years younger than you, so there's that.”

“Y/N it was nothing! We used to hook up. Why are you getting so bent out of shape over this?”

“Because I love you, you fucking idiot!!” You sobbed. “When I said I love you it wasn't post sex I love you it was an I love you I love you.” You quickly wiped your tears and took a deep breath. “I never asked you to say it back… but the fact that you told her you did and all she was was a hook up buddy-”

“She was just my friend with benefits. I didn't love her like I love you…”

“Y-You do?”

“Christ girl, yes. Fuckin’ crazy about you. Can't get enough of you. You not know how bad I want you to just move in here with me? I wanna spend every moment with you. You’re the last thing I wanna see at night and the first thing I wanna see in the mornin’...” he grabbed your hands and pulled you closer to him. “I love you, Y/N…”

“I love you too, Joel…”

____________________________________________

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[13as07]

Patience #3.5

(Jiraiya Smut)

[Art work is not mine! Credit to Ibuo]

Requested by: Myself

Word Count: 6,231

Warnings and/or Pre-Notes:

Part 3 from Jiraiya's POV

Sorry it’s so long but not really cause I love writing his prospective

Nicknames/Name Calling: Little One, Sensei, Sweet Girl, Princess, Sweetheart, Obedient Girl, Sir, Sex Addict

Exhibitionism (public sex)

Age Gap/Power Indifference (teacher/student)

Creampie

Spanking

Little rougher domination

Improper use of a hairbrush (Yes, in that way. Still not sorry)

———————————————————————

The whimpers my kunoichi spills out only make the next few days seem even more looming. It's been driving me crazy, knowing I can't treat her like I have been. No random quickies everywhere all the time, no cuddling up in public or drowning her in affection. We're back home now, I have to be at least somewhat professional.

Plus, there's the small hovering doom of talking to Tsunade. I can only imagine the lecture and string of profanity she'll use once I tell her I did - and have been - sleeping with my student. Not to mention the black eye I'm sure I'll get since my old squad mate has a habit of responding with her fists before her words.

Once she does calm down, Tsunade will probably tell me I'm playing with fire, that I'm ruining my kunoichi's future, that I'm injuring my reputation, that I've managed to reach a whole new level of perverted. But it's so worth it.

     If I have to I'll give up the shinobi life, I'll retire, I'll focus on writing my books, and my kunoichi can continue living her life like the badass little ninja she is. Or we can both quit and buy a nice little cottage on the outskirts of town with a private hot spring.

My mouth clicks shut, cutting off my Princess's praises long enough to get my thoughts straight before I start them up again. That's a long-term idea. A long-term idea that has no room in our blooming relationship. I haven't even taken the girl on a proper date and I'm already planning my retirement with her. We've been doing stuff so backward it has my thoughts in knots.

"Little One?" I call, dipping my head down long enough to get the words out. I tip my head back up, taking in the sight of my student. She looks so hot, back arched with her pants around her knees as I have her pressed up against the tree. Her hands seem small under mine, another reminder of our size difference. I think my Princess is making me form a size kink.

"Sensei?" She whispers back, glancing at me for a millisecond before they're back in place. My Sweet Girl is focused on the entrance of our home village, the closeness both exciting and terrifying her. It's cute, seeing my student wrestle with herself over how wrong but good the situation feels.

I press kisses behind her ear, matching them to the thrusts I make into her pussy. Every bottom-out I do gets rewarded with a gentle kiss, pulling more pretty noises from my Sweetheart. "We..." I start, my climax coming quicker than I want it to.

I'm worn out already today, courtesy of me stopping and pushing my Sweet Girl against a tree every thirty minutes or so. I keep trying to convince myself it's to get it out of her system, but I'm pretty sure we both know it's to get it out of mine. "We can't..." I try again, stopping when my dick twitches.

My Little One bucks her hips backward, pushing me over the edge way before I'd like. I want to enjoy our last bout of freedom, I want to stay in this moment until I have her skin memories and damn it, I want to last longer than two minutes. "We can't what?" She whispers as if the trees outside the village will voice our sins.

"We can't..." I try again, shoving myself back into my pretty Sweetheart, soaking in the feeling of her wrapped around me, the feeling of her pussy leaking down my balls, the feeling of her, as I fill her cunt again today. Marking my territory in my new favorite way. "Be all over each other," I finally manage to get out, my mind a bit clearer now that I've finished.

"Why not?" My Sweetheart whimpers as I pull out of her.

My Sweet Girl looks beautiful like this. Her legs are spread wide, giving me the best possible view of her pussy. It's pinker than normal, from my overuse of it today. She's gapping, desperately clenching from the new emptiness as I spill out of her, coating her gorgeous thighs in the thick white of my cum. I swear I could spend a whole chapter explaining this view alone, maybe I will.

"It's unprofessional, Sweet Girl," I softly explain, giving into my want and bending forward to scoop myself off her skin. She looks nice coated in my semen but it looks so much better in her. "Besides, I need to talk to Tsunade about... this," I add, thrusting my fingers into her. My Sweetheart might look gorgeous gapping for me but it doesn't mean I like leaving her needy.

She whines as my fingertips toy with her, disappointment in her face. At least this time I know it's from my words and not my seeming inability to keep up with her sex drive. "You're fine, Sweet Girl," I mutter, kissing her shoulder in a failed attempt to muffle my laughter. I love the mess of whines and whimpers my student becomes when she doesn't get her way, and almost every time I can't help but laugh with joy at the sight.

The moment doesn’t last though, the weight of today setting in. God, I'm too attached, way too quickly. The thought of my Little One sleeping alone in her apartment makes my chest ache. She should be sleeping with me, in my house, in my bed. I should be able to roll over and hold her in the middle of the night like I've done for the past few weeks.

The thought is upsetting, it makes me anxious. My hands jump forward to cover her up again. I don't need someone to see my student with her pants down, literally. My attention quickly shifts to repeatedly squeezing her hips to counteract the anxiety weighing on me. My anxiety only seems to grow as I heard her towards the village entrance.

When that doesn't help my anxiety either, I change pace to feeling her skin against mine again. My hands grasp at her, my lips just as hopeless as I brush new kisses into her neck, desperate to press the feeling of her skin into my mind.

"Sensei?" She giggles, starting to silence my anxiety. "You're pretty all over me for it being 'unprofessional'."

"Hush Princess," I whisper, shifting my attention away from her. I scan the entrance, my fingertips dancing over her skin, helping more of my anxiety seep away.

I hate the thought of being away from her. What if something happens and I'm not there to help? When we're on a mission we spend twenty-four-seven together. That's not going to happen now that we're home.

My head dips down, placing another marking on her skin in our last few seconds of true alone time. I cup her pussy too, tapping my fingers against my Sweetheart before I tug away. My temporary goodbye to our very active sex life.

     I feel like a schoolboy once again. The anxious attachment young boys experience with their first girlfriends. So distressed, so upset at the thought of being apart from my Sweet Girl. Maybe some time apart won't be too bad, as long as she's safe.

     The thought of this being a healthy space makes me feel better and makes it easier to let go of my grasp on her and pull away.

     "Sensei? Are you going to ignore me again?" My student asks, distraught covering her face as I pull away. My Sweetheart doesn't like me pulling away, which is evident from her wrapping around my arm. She looks small, wrapped around me like this. She looks even smaller when she squirms from my fingertips brushing over her pussy. I'm definitely developing a size kink.

     The distraught she's feeling quickly gets replaced. My kunoichi's mischievous glint fills her eyes as a pout forms on her face, promising a bratty tantrum to follow. "What if I get needy? Then who am I supposed to do?"

     I take it back, I don't feel like a schoolboy. I feel pissed off like I'm ready to throw down with any man that dears to glance at her. It's the same anger I had at dinner with Riku, jealousy that I can’t seem to control.

     Before I can stop myself, I tug my arm away from her, jumping forward to grip her face. This is another new thing between us. Since my Princess doesn't like my hand around her throat, I've started gripping her face to keep her attention on me.

     I snap her head upward, forcing her eye contact with me as I glare down at her. "Don't you dare," I husk out, soaking in the way my Sweetheart's eyes soften. They're round and glazed over, tempting me to break my temporary hardness. "Go ahead, try your little act. See how far that gets you," I continue before dipping my head down, making sure the next sentence stays between the two of us instead of the villagers eavesdropping on the street. "See how empty everyone else makes you feel compared to your Sensei."

     My Little One's hands snack up my arm, her fingers clinging to my wrist as her breath picks up. I enjoy the view, the way she seems so eager for me as I pull away from her face. It's cute, her eyes, how easily I got her roaring again, how she tries to pull my hold off her even though she knows it is useless.

     "I'm just kidding, Sensei," she whimpers, a whine bubbling in her throat. My student flutters her eyes down, focusing on my fingers clinging to her cheeks.

     That only pisses me off more, making me shift her head again. "Joke like that again and I'll beat your ass back into obedience, you understand me?" I mutter, watching for her reaction.

     My Sweetheart's thighs rub together, only encouraging my roughness. Her eyes are drowning in lust, tongue almost hanging out of her mouth in a pant. "Yes, Sensei," My Princess says softly, quickly making my dick hard again. I need to talk to Tsunade.

     "That's my Sweetheart. Be an Obedient Girl," I praise, debating on kissing her or not as a reward. There are a lot of people out and about though, and I really should bring Tsunade into the loop before I'm public about my relationship, or lack thereof. I need to take my kunoichi on a date.

     "Yes, Sensei," she repeats, satisfying me. I rub her cheeks for a second before letting her go.

     Date ideas swirl around my head as I continue walking. I shouldn't take her out to eat, we already do that all the time, so it wouldn't be any different. Well, if I take her somewhere fancy but I should probably put a little more effort into it.

     My Sweet Girl's hands collide with my back, balling up my shirt once I'm in her grasp. "Sensei, where are we going?" Her sweet voice rings out, silencing my thoughts for a second.

     "We have to report to Tsunade, Little One," I answer, slowly my paces so the chance of her tripping goes down.

     Her fingers tap against my back, tapping out some melody as she trails after me. "That's boring. Are you going to talk to her while we're there? About us?" She asks, making my anxiety claw back into my chest.

     "No," I answer quickly, my prediction of Tsunade reaction rolling around my head. I don't need my student seeing Tsunade hand me my ass.

     My Little One clings to my shirt, the material balled in her hands again. "Why not?" She's upset, actually upset and not her whiney 'I'm needy, fuck me' upset. It makes my heart ache. I don't want to disappoint my Sweetheart.

     "You don't need to be present during that conversation, Sweet Girl," I answer a laugh following my words. I can only imagine her face while I'm getting my shit rocked. "Don't worry your pretty little mind, I'll talk to her soon, have some patience," I coo, trying to ease over her emotions.

     "Promise?" My Little One asks, her voice softly as she clings to my shirt harder.

     "Promise."

————————————

     My heart seems loud in my ears as I search the hallways for my student. Today's anxiety is a mixture of the speech I've been practicing to confess my situation to Tsunade and because I can't find my Sweetheart.

     I left her for ten minutes, only ten minutes, long enough to talk to the Head Anbu. Long enough to fill him in on the new information on the Akatsuki. Ten minutes and she's gone. On the plus note, she can't be in too much trouble. After all the Hokage palace is the most secure place in the village. My Little One can't be getting into much mischief... I think.

     I roll over my speech, rehearsing it again so that when I finally talk to Tsunade I have it down. Tsunade who already seems suspicious. Tsunade who seems to have noticed every whine, whimper, and grasp my kunoichi has tried in the past week. Tsunade who asked why my student spends so much time at my house.

     Tsunade who I've avoided talking to because she's terrifying. I know I've been putting off our conversation. I know it's disappointing my Sweetheart. I know my Sweet Girl is getting upset from the lack of me, from the lack of sex, the lack of my time and attention, and from the lack of us having a proper relationship. From me sucking at relationships and putting off asking her on a proper date. I need to stop putting stuff off.

     "Oh my God. You thought... oh my," my Princess's voice rings out, distress evident in her voice.

     My body jerks, panic washing over me at the sound. My pace picks up, scanning the hallways and rooms for her. What situation could she possibly be in? Why couldn’t she just obey me and stay put?

     "No!" Someone barks, making me stress even more. "Well not at first but when you said you were training under Jiraiya I just... I wanted to be sure you weren't..." The voice continues, making it easier to figure out where the possible threat to my kunoichi is.

     I scurry forward, turning down the hallway I'm pretty sure the voices are coming from. I was right, which is good, but so bad.

     Genma, one of Tsunade's guards, is hovering over my kunoichi. My Little One that has her hand down his pants. My Sweet Girl who told me when we got home that if I ignored her, she'd find her wants somewhere else. My student who's looking up at Genma with those big beautiful 'fuck me' eyes that should be looking up at me. My Sweetheart that's enveloped in Genma's frame that doesn't make her seem as small as she seems under me. My Princess and Genma who are making my blood boil.

     "I'm not a pervert," Genma continues, pissing me off even more. How can he say that? He has her caged, has her stuck under him, has someone young enough to be his student pressed up against the wall as he humps my Sweetheart like some street mutt.

     I know it's hypocritical of me. I've spent the past month sleeping with my Little One, I'm older than both of them, I am known for being a pervert. But she's my student, my kunoichi, my Sweetheart, which means I have dibs. Dibs that I fully use, constantly.

     "Could convince me otherwise," I huff, my voice coming out louder than I meant. I can feel my anger seeping off of me, I can feel the heat of it on my face and crawling across my chest.

     Despite that, my Little One doesn't seem to notice. "Hi, Sensei!" She calls, shifting out from under Genma's arms, her hand still buried down his pants, which only pisses me off more. "How was your meeting?" She continues, her soft sweetness soaking through the heavy situation.

     That upsets me even more. My Sweet Girl is so happy to have my attention, so happy to see me, all because of my lack of affection towards her. I storm down the hallway, Genma getting paler the closer I get and my student getting happier.

     Genma jerks away from my student, bowing once I get closer. "Jiraya, Sannin, sir," he shrieks towards the ground. He's as nervous as I'm pissed. It's would funny if I didn't have the image of my kunoichi clinging to him burned into my head.

     "Genma," I call back, focus set on my bubbly student. She's all smiles with her usual mischievousness in her eyes. She's happy I caught her. It almost hurts, knowing even though I'm angry my Sweetheart is joyful to have my attention. "My student is too young for you." That's a lie, Genma is a more fitting age gap than her and me, but I'm choosing to ignore that.

     "She's only... ten years younger... sir." The sentence snaps my anger back into place, completely counteracting the soothing my student unknowingly started.

     My Princess shifts, mirroring me as she shows off her smile. "That's not so bad, Sensei. After all, you're thirty years older than me," she points out, as cocky as ever.

     I crouch down, locking eyes with her before I start speaking. "Ya, well, I don't have you pinned to the Hokage Palace wall, rubbing my boner against you."

     Somehow her smile grows even more. Her curved mouth opens, a promise to throw a comment about us into the open. I jerk forward, wrapping my hand around my Sweetheart's mouth to cut her off. "You're being a disgraceful shinobi," I hiss out, deepening my glare.

     Genma moves, pulling himself out of his bow. "Sannin, sir?"

     "Get out of my presence," I hiss, burning my student's cocky face into my mind. She looks cute and inspirational. Maybe I'll put this scene in my new book too.

     "Yes, sir. Sorry, sir," Genma mumbles before darting away, leaving me alone with my cocky attention hungry student.

     My Sweetheart jerks away from me, mouth running as soon as she's free from my grasp. "You know good and well you'd be thrilled to be humping me against the wall too. Or maybe not, since you seem to not be into me anymore."

     She's right, about the first part. I'd give anything for a few uninterrupted minutes with her. My skin burns from not being able to feel hers, my fingers are impatient with the yearning to feel her hair running through them, and my balls are so heavy it feels like I'll nut just from her stare.

     The second half of my Little One's rant isn't correct, nowhere near it. It ticks my anger even more. Can't she tell how much I want her? Can't my Sweetheart see how desperate I am for every part of her? Hasn't she noticed how much I crave her touch? Her voice? Her eyes? Her laugh? Why can't my pretty kunoichi see how addicted I am to her? How much I adore her sass, her attitude, her personality, her very being?

     "Little One," I grumble, terribly failing at hiding my anger that I know truly isn't her fault. I'm upset at the situation I put us in, at the fact I keep putting off talking to Tsunade. "If I had it my way, we'd be locked up in my house for the next week doing nothing but practicing scenarios for my new book," I confess my little fantasy to her as my hand cups her cheeks again. I cling to her face, soaking up the softness of her skin rubbing against mine.

     I have thought about it a lot, reenacting scenes from my past books, and recreating situations with her so I can take them in better to be able to describe them perfectly in my next novel. I've been rolling over the plot of my next story, thinking of mirroring it to ours.

     My Sweetheart will make a fantastic read, an amazing heroine. I can't help the fact that my recent writings have curved around her, that I'm set on giving her to the inked paper, all to share my small piece of heaven with others that occupy the living realm. It would be sinful not to share her with the world.

      "But," I continue, shifting closer to her with the hopes it'll stop my wandering mind. "We have a very important job for our village. I cannot drop everything every time your pussy aches for attention. Stop acting like a spoiled Princess." The words seem harsh, even as I say them, but she pays no attention to them.

     My Little One goes straight into her tantrum, further proving to me how little of my longing I share with her. "You haven't paid any attention to me, Jiraya! You said you'd talk to Tsunade but you haven't. It's all your fault we're not having sex, much less anything else. I can live awhile without you in me but you won't give me any undivided attention."

    "Oh ya? Is that your issue Sweet Girl?" I mock, my ego completely rubbed from her whines. "Is that why you're acting out? You miss me? You miss my attention? My dick, you sex addict? You miss my little kisses and touches? You miss our dinners alone?"

     My Sweetheart wraps herself around my arm again, her fingers clinging to me as those big dewy eyes of hers look up at me. It's tempting, to give away to my jealousy, ball her up under me, fuck her against the wall like Genma so desperately wanted to.

     But I can't. She needs to learn there is a time and place. The Hokage palace is neither the right time nor place.

     Her fingers dig into me, clinging to my wrist. "Yes," My Sweet Girl whimpers, as pouty as ever. "Like me back, Jiraiya. Pay attention to me. Like me back," the repeated sentence comes out soft, almost a cry as the words tumble from her lips.

     Her last sentence rings in my ears, making me feel better about whatever this is. This isn't some fling for my student, it's something she wants. Something she craves just as much as me. "I'm sorry, Sweetheart. I know I've been busy. I'll make it up to you, I promise," I voice, loosening my fingers.

     I tip my head, brushing long-awaited kisses across her face. My Princess feels nice against me, only encouraging my addiction even more.

     Despite the attention, she's still huffy. "Sure you will."

     "I will," I reiterate, shifting my head closer to her ear. "Because I like you back," I whisper, brushing more kisses across her. "We'll go out tomorrow, okay? A nice dinner all alone, and I'll give you all the attention you want. Just be patient, Sweet Girl." I know it's unfair of me, I know she has been patient, I know. But, events of the day are already in motion and I can't put them off. Not unless I want Tsunade on me.

     My kunoichi clings to me tighter, trying to tug my hold off as she whines. "You said that earlier this week. I have been patient. We're not going to get to eat alone, we never do. Hurry up and talk to Tsunade." She gets to be a pouty mess because she's right. We can't go anywhere - much less sit down to eat - without bumping into someone who wants or needs something from me. The life of a famed shinobi and a high-selling author.

"I will. Today. I promise," I mutter, the anxiety of talking to Tsunade already sliding up my spine. I shift my gaze, soaking in the color of her eyes again to help calm myself. "But, tonight I'm going to beat your ass red since you want to be such an unobedient girl," I continue, scanning for her reaction.

From the way my Princess has been reacting recently, she likes it when I'm a little more rugged on occasion. This time isn't any different. Lust pools her eyes as her legs rub together, a tell-all sign that I've turned her on. "Why?" She peeps out, her fake innocence covering her face as she looks up at me.

I can't help but laugh at her little act, at how see-through we both know it is. I dip back down, barely letting our lips touch as I talk. "Why? Because, Little One, you went and acted like you're on the market for anyone to have. You are mine. My student, my kunoichi, mine, and apparently filling up your tight little cunt and marking you up isn't enough proof for you."

My words turn me on just as much as I'm sure they make my Princess brew. Just the thought of my cum dripping out of her pussy is enough to make my dick ache. "You are mine," I say again, watching the way her eyes light up. "Repeat it," I order, desperate to hear her agree. Desperate to know for certain that my Sweetheart does want to be mine.

     "I am yours."

     I am not a religious man, but I swear to whatever God I can find in the time I have left, I will thank them every day for getting to hear those three little words.

     My eyes shoot down, quickly followed by my hand, as I watch my Sweetheart attempt to stimulate herself. She doesn't get to do that, she doesn't get to get off after she's spent the past few minutes teasing me, tempting me.

     I grip her inner thigh, tugging her legs apart as I start my next order. "I have to run an errand for Tsunade. You, Sweetheart, are going to go home, strip, and sit on my bed with your head in my pillows and your ass in the air." The thought of my Obedient Girl actually obeying me strains my pants even more. 

     "You are going to wait, and wait, and wait until I am done. If you even dare to touch yourself, I will overstimulate you until you feel like you can't breathe, am I understood?" It's harsh, like I was before, but I intend to stay true to my words. If my Little One wants to prance around with Genma, she doesn't get to cum on her own. She gets to be reminded of how well I know her body, how easy it is for me to satisfy her, and how quickly I can become too much for her.

     "Yes, Sensei," she mumbles, still trying to rub her thighs together. The plushness of her fills my hand, her tissue soaking through my fingers, turning me on even more. I swear this errand and my conversation with Tsunade is going to feel like an eternity.

     I litter her lips in soft quick kisses, digging in my pocket for my keys. "There's my Obedient Girl. Use those patience I've taught you," I murmur, giving her my keys as I soak in the feeling of her mouth against mine.

     "Yes, Sensei," She repeats a bit louder this time, making the fit Tsunade would throw if I pushed off her errand seem worth it. It's not, I have work to do, I can wait. I can wait. I can wait.

     "Sweet Girl," I praise, tilting my head as the words spill out. I deepen our kiss, keeping us connected longer this time. I can't wait. "Go home and wait," I order, pulling away from her beautiful face. I can't walk away, and if she doesn't, I'm going to get one hell of a beating from Tsunade.

     My Princess does as she's ordered, playing with my keys as she walks away from me. I stay put, watching the way her hips sway as she walks away. I swear this girl is going to be the death of me.

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     The closer to home I get, the more my anxiety seeps out of me. I did it, I told Tsunade about my student and me. She didn’t attack me, she didn’t even yell. All she did was sit there and glare, which somehow was worse than anything else. It means that tomorrow she’s going to have one hell of a reaction. Oh well, that’s tomorrow’s issue.

My balls ache when my front door falls into view. My Sweetheart is waiting for me in there, my Sweetheart that’s about to get her pussy destroyed and her cunt filled. It’s been too long since I’ve left my load in her.

My actions are quick, anticipation fills my balls more than my semen does. It’s a blur, getting into the house and making my way to my bedroom. “Little One?” I call, swinging my bedroom door open.

A groan brews in my throat at the sight of her. She’s laid exactly how I asked her, her head buried in my pillows and her butt in the air. My Princess’s pussy is on display, her wetness glistening and walls clenching for me. “There’s my Obedient Girl,” I coo, walking across the room.

“Welcome home, Sensei. How was your errand?” She asks, knuckles white from clinging to the pillowcase. God damn, I want to shove my dick into her dripping cunt, I want to fuck her until tears coat her face, I want to fill her pussy so much that I’m leaking out of her all through tomorrow.

“It was fine,” I finally answer, eyes still locked on her pulsing cunt. “How has my bedroom been?” I ask, settling on the bed. I run my fingers through her folds, enjoying the warmth and her juices oozing from her.

“Good,” she whimpers, pussy clenching even more from my small touch.

I shift my focus, messing with her hole to see it gap even more for me. I’m a jerk about it, barely pushing my fingertips into her. My focus stays on this spot of her, ways to describe her core running through my head.

After a beat, I tug my fingers further up, focusing my teasing on her clit. “You've been very bratty, Sweetheart. I'm worried my spoiling of you is making you rotten, Princess,” I confess to her despite not actually being that worried about it. I like how bratty she is and how needy she can be. It’s nice having a partner that can keep up with my urges.

My Little One bucks backward, her pussy unsatisfied and upset with my teasing. “I’m not,” she whimpers, his desperately trying to get me to finger her pussy.

“Hush, Little One,” I mutter, smacking her pussy before completely pulling my touch away. I pay attention to how she reacts, partly for her good and partly to describe this scene in my next book. I’ve finally settled on a plot, and beating her ass is going to be the opening chapter. This is going to be the first chapter, her pussy dripping for me and aching even more from the small slap I gave it.

I stand up, off to go find something to spank her with. I could use my hands and watch the way her butt easily fits in my grasp, but if written that scene a hundred times. I need something new, something exciting for my readers.

I settle in front of my desk, shifting stuff around in search of something to use. “Sensei?” My Sweetheart calls, dividing my attention for a second. “What are you doing?” She asks as my eyes settle on my hairbrush. That could work, it could work very well actually.

“I told you, Sweetheart,” I start, heading back towards her. My student has shifted her position, head tucked down to watch me under her pressed-together knees. “I'm going to beat your ass red.”

My eyes jump between her pussy and her face, enjoying the sight of her like this. When my knees collide with the bed, I’m back to action instead of just admiring her. My hand settles in her hair, clinging to her locks as I fix her position. I know I won’t be able to beat her ass if she’s looking at me like that. “Stay like that, Sweet Girl. I don’t need the neighbors hearing you.”

I release her hair, my sights set on the arch of her back. I love how pretty my Princess’s back looks when she’s bent like this. My fingers tumble down, sliding over the bumps and valleys of her spine. I change my mind, I could spend a chapter describing the curves of her back instead of the sight of her pussy.

When I run out of valleys on her back, my attention shifts to her butt. My touches are gentle and soft, toying with her skin to prep it for the spankings it’s going to receive. Once I’m satisfied with my cooing, I focus back on the reasoning for her position. I pull the brush backward before letting it swing down, smacking the plastic of it into her behind.

“Sensei!” My kunoichi squeals, jumping forward from the blooming pain.

My eyes skirt over the blooming pink of her behind, the outline of the brush head stamped into her cheek. “Oh, you’re fine spoiled Princess,” I mutter, scanning her body language, making sure she’s not uncomfortable and that the smack wasn’t too hard. I grip her waist, tugging her back into position.

I go back to calming her skin, toying with the pink skin as I watch the way her pussy clenches from the touch, making sure I’ll be able to describe it perfectly in my rough draft tonight. When I’m satisfied with a description, I turn back to spanking her.

I coat her behind in more spankings, switching between her cheeks as I coat them with pink ovals. It’s intoxicating, the sound of the hard plastic colliding with my student’s skin, the sound of her whines and whimpers, the sight of her pussy clenching.

Her juices drip from her cunt, starting to cost her thighs. “Aw, look at that. You like this, don’t you, Sweetheart?” I tease, landing another smack as the fingers not wrapped around the brush dips into her. “Your pussy is all wet from your spankings,” I continue the mockery, sliding my touch through her pussy. “Let me take care of you, Little One,” I hum out, satisfied with the rest run, though we might have to try again if I struggle with my writing process.

I bend down, sliding my lips over her sore skin as I toy with her, ideas of how to spice up the story tumbling around my head. My eyes flicked to the abandoned brush, an idea forming in my head. I’ve heard stories of women getting off with their hairbrushes, I wonder what that would look like, how my pretty Princess would react.

“Sensei?” My Sweet Girl whines, the sound going straight to my dick. She thrusts backward again, only encouraging the growing boner in my pants.

My fingers wrap around the brush again, tugging it up before I line it to her cunt. “Princess?”

I tip the end of the handle into my Sweetheart, getting her to jump forward in response. “What are you doing?!” She yelps, head snapping down between her legs again.

My student is beautiful, with eyes that enchant me every time I see them. God, I’m addicted to this girl. “You need to learn to listen, Little One,” I start, lining the hairbrush against her again. I tip it back into her, moving slowly just in case. I don’t think it will hurt, but it’s a different plastic than a dildo so I’m still going to be careful. “I told you I wanted to practice scenarios for my new book.”

Her pussy shifts open as I press the plastic further into her. My Sweet Girl’s walls clench around it, trying to sink it further into herself. It doesn’t work though, making me a bit smug. “You’re a pervert,” she mumbles, hips rocking in need.

I give her what she wants, slowly thrusting the brush in and out of her. “I’m not a pervert. I can’t write a scene I haven’t acted out, and you, my Sweet Girl, made it very clear you don’t want me doing my research on other women. So, that leaves you.” It’s an honest observation, even from before we were screwing. It’s gotten worse since we started sleeping together, my kunoichi’s jealousy being just as bad as mine.

My eyes drop at the same time my hand does. I snake it between her legs, quick to find her neglected clit. It doesn’t take long for my Little One to come undone. “Sensei,” she whines, her pussy clinging to the brush as she coats it with her cum.

“Princess,” I call back, dipping my head down. I go straight to licking up her mess, enjoying my fix of her as I occasionally brush a kiss or two against her thighs. “This will make a wonderful chapter for my book,” I mutter, thrusting the handle of the brush into her again. I need to make her orgasm with it once more, just to be sure I can describe the situation perfectly. What an obedient student I have, one that’s perfect for my research.

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[springtime-creations]

Longwinded over-explanation as to why I DON'T think these Wanderful PreCure leaks are real or at the very least not be taken as 100% accurate if they are real.

POTENTIAL SPOILER FOR WANDERFUL PRECURE AHEAD!

As someone who's been into PreCure for almost a decade, and has been studying art in an informal setting (self taught artist go brrr) I've noticed some issues with these leaks.

First is obviously the names. Never in the entire history of PreCure have we had a cure whose name lines up with the title. No Cure Smile in Smile, no Cure Suite in Suite, no Cure Fresh in Fresh- you get my point. Cure Wonderful is a highly suspect name, however could still be real as PreCure is always experimenting. Cure Friendy on the other hand is WAY more egregious. Friendy isn't a word, and PreCure isn't known for making mistakes that bad. But it could have either slipped through the cracks OR as these photos look like prototypes that were meant to be destroyed, it's possible Friendy is a typo and she's meant to be Cure Friend, Cure Friendly, or an idea my phone gave me via autocorrect Cure Trendy. Any of which could fit my theorized theme of dog styling or the latter to with a blanket theme of dogs. But they could also be placeholder names. Fake names used to differentiate the characters before they're ready to start publishing their real names.

Secondly is the design. Although I'm not classically trained (see above for self taught artist go brrr) I have a good grasp on art fundamentals via independent study. I was wondering why the designs looked so off to me, and outside of it looking like it was traced off of Aikatsu, I realized that these silhouettes SUCK. Having a strong silhouette is an important aspect of making an identifiable cartoon character. Case and point, a few previous seasons compared with these leaks:

(Pardon the rough nature of the silhouettes, I had to make my own on my phone) without the details, I have no idea what I'm looking at with these designs. With previous seasons, the silhouettes themselves gave us an idea of the vibes or even themes for the upcoming season. Here though? I mean my crappy silhouette of Cure Wonderful made her pigtails look like a cat sitting on her head when I asked my boyfriend for input. These silhouettes are incredibly weak with their long hair basically ruining their design by hiding their dresses. Fun fact! These are the same issues I had with Colgate-chan- oh sorry Alear from Fire Emblem Engage that made me think those were fake too. The minor details were the only thing that separated them from other characters since their silhouette was awful.

Now weak silhouettes aren't always a crime against art, however for a piece of media that is meant to sell toys, is in animation, and for children? Yeah no you need a strong silhouette for the audience to easily identify. The only reason such a weak silhouette would work in PreCure is because no other Cure has one this bland. You can tell which PreCure is Cure Wonderful because "oh that's the least fun looking one". Since her charm comes from the details you can't see when it's just her silhouette, that means that although they're all still cute, they could have been MUCH cuter, which Toei is typically really good at.

So in conclusion, are these definitely fake? I'm not sure. Given these products were probably taken home without permission from the manufacturer, it's possible these leaks are one of three things.

1. An INCREDIBLY well done fake leak, potentially by Toei themselves since they do that sometimes.

2. Real prototypes made with VERY early drafts of the characters and placeholder names that were intended to be destroyed once the designs/names got updated.

3. This is the real deal and this is going to be a fairly weak season in terms of aesthetic.

I'm personally leaning towards 1 or 2 since PreCure usually has higher standards of production. But hey, this is just my theory regarding these leaks. I know one of my girlfriends loves Cure Friendy, and I'm always here for more green rep in PreCure. I'm still excited for this season even if the aesthetic might be a bit weak. If there's anything I've learnt from PreCure, it's that even the most casual of seasons can get real dark real quick and somehow still work. Didn't Cure Grace literally leave someone to die... idk I haven't been able to watch a full PreCure season since like Go! Princess first came out 😭 fuck I'm getting old-

[crmsnmth]

Hello

I guess I wasn't clear enough on the third version, so here's Version 4 Introductions are stupid. Hi. My name is Chris. I'm 35. I live in a small-town of about 2000 people in the center of the state of Wisconsin. It is not even close to as glamorous as it sounds. I've lived in quite a few other places though, but I guess it's true that we always go home. I work as a kitchen manager/EC. I've been working in the kitchen on and off for most of my working life. My first job was a cashier at a certain fast food pizza place that makes rectangle pizzas. That aren't good, but the breadsticks always kicked ass.

I am a massive music fan (it's playing right now) and when I tell you I listen to all music, believe me when I say all music. My main daily playlist is always growing and includes everything from iwrestledabearonce to Katy Perry (listen to her unplugged album. Kissed a Girl as a jazz type thing is beautiful) to Atmosphere to Miley Cyrus to Alan Jackson to Dying Fetus. My favorite band is Descendents with Amigo The Devil and Frank Turner coming very very close to that coveted spot. I am a major horror fan, and I don't think I own a single t-shirt that isn't somehow horror related. I'm a sucker for the 80's slashers. I've seen every Friday the 13th movie enough times that if you ever watch them with me, I will annoy you by quoting the lines throughout the whole movie. I am Bipolar. Type 1. I am a raging cynic.

I am an addict in (long-term) recovery. I am sober. I write more than any sane person does, but I never once claimed to be sane. I write because if I don't, my head will explode. You can think this a metaphor all you want.

I do not write for anyone's approval, not even my own. I do this because it's a safe form of release that it's ok to be addicted to. If you have constructive criticism, I'll gladly take it because let's face it, I'm pretty bad at this whole thing. If you're just going to tell me I suck, in however many words, well, I don't need you to tell me that. Dick. I don't follow any rules or guidelines in what I write. So I call it lawless poetry even though half of it doesn't even fit poetry. Most of it is stream of conciseness built around a line or phrase I came up with during the day. I do this every single night. It's my ritual before bed. I journal (which is also posted in a blog) and then I work on my phrases and lines. I've been called garbage at this, but to those who can't give me a reason (other then you don't like it)if you can't back up your reason for being an art critic, your opinion means jack to me. Besides, anyone who claims to be an art critic is a narcissistic jackass. Art is subjective. Not just "I don't like it." Tell me why you don't like it. Tell me it's repetitive. I need to stop. Or I'll rant and moan about why I hate armchair critics for way too long.

So what will you find on my tiny drop in the ocean of the internet? You will see bad poetry, and an awful lot of it to be honest. You'll find random drops of fiction or a story I happen to be working on and want some form of opinion on it. I post at least once a day, but can post up to ten or fifteen times a day. And most of it is just your average mundane sad boy bad poetry. And if you see how much I do post, think of how much stuff I have laying around that never gets touched. I have boxes of notebooks, napkins and matchbooks with lines I thought were clever.

So since I write so much, what the hell is it exactly that I write about? That's easy. I'm pretty predictable in the end. So, this stuff: The Girl With Ocean Blue Eyes*, Kid*,The Broken Mirror Girl*, My Junkie Angel*, The Girl From California*, An Ex Band-Mate*, love, lost lovers, hopelessness, isolation, drug addiction, alcoholism, depression, forgotten acquaintances, mental illnesses, rage, hate, rejection, joy, insignificant moments, slices of life, laughter, beauty, self and self-reflection, self-hate, art, other writers, panic, infatuations, obsession, therapy, group homes, rehab, jail, grace, nature, loss, hope, fear, grief, anguish, philosophy, anarchism, nihilism, religion, god, the devil, ugliness, politics, serial killers, cults, suicide, death, destruction, chaos, music, validation, closure, memory, enemies, friends, rock bottom, sex, violence, rock and roll, sin, self-exploration, bipolar disorder, schizoaffecive disorder, pain, self-destruction much more.

Consider this line right here your trigger warning. Please see above to see my chosen subjects, and it should be clear that I will write something that can bring up some feelings. I make music as well for another creative outlet. No, I don't churn out songs like I do the written word, but I love my music and if you would like to tell me how much I suck at it here's the links:

If I come off as extremely depressed in my work, please know that I am fine. I'm good. Ok? Ok.

There, now you know the barest of my bare bones. You want to know anything else, just ask. I'm always happy for the fifteen second interaction. And I always try to interact with those who interact with me, but I am not one to talk first. If you follow me, know that I will most likely follow you back. Unless your space is empty, a bot, or straight-up porn.

*Not their real names.

[unorcadox]

UNORCADOX

howdy, i'm mabel! it's the 3 year anniversary of unorcadox today, so i've prepared a decent bit of surprises. (and yes that means i started this blog in 2020, which is terrifying to think about.) i'll go into those new things under the cut, but first... check out the carrd linked in the header text of this post :3c

sooo soo so so so where on earth do i begin. uhh honestly let me just break down the new stuff first since i can talk about that more easily.

THE NEW LOOK! ok so like truth be told, i've been a faceless blog on purpose up until now. it wasn't until this summer where i actually liked how i looked or had any solid sense of my own aesthetic or what i wanted to look like. it also made it easier to protect against dysphoria and transphobes in the same breath, as no one could ever comment on any aspect of my appearance, or even the mere suggestion i even had one to begin with! but that all changes now, i'm going to actually have a presence on this blog, as it is MY blog and tbh i'm tired of being so faceless on here. that's why i've been doing more asks and non-edit posts recently, and those will increase in frequency. check out the carrd for more info, my sona's ref, and art credits for assets on here <3

mondays -> MUSIC MONDAYS! so it might come as a shock i'm actually a musician in addition to making stuff on here! i've promoted my music a couple of times by now, but nothing all that substantial. sooo, considering that, i'm going to be replacing monday oc posts with a music post! just a link to a song on my bandcamp and a little description about it. i don't really care if these perform particularly well, but i want to give people a chance to actually hear it without having to deep dive through my entire internet history to get it. i also will be releasing more soon-- whether via compilations of older work or new stuff altogether :3

MORE IN THE FUTURE! i have a couple other ideas up my sleeve, we'll see how they pan out but i wanna keep trying new possibilities on here. i think at this point i've proven my consistency, and it's about time i let myself have a little fun and explore my options. these will be announced individually but probably added here over time as this is the new pinned post lol.

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ok so anyways, i do wanna have the mandatory sappy segment because of course i do. i want to say a couple of things but i'll split them into bullet points again bc yeah i do that.

this year has been really good for me and the blog, in most ways it's been the straight up best year of my life uncontested. not everything has gone perfectly, i had other plans that fell through, but hey that's just how life goes huh. at one point, i was easily projected to hit 20k by the end of the year, and now i'll be happy if i hit 17k lol. tumblr has not been that kind to my blog's growth this year and it's making me consider other options in the future, but everything's so scary rn i don't wanna commit to anything.

as for the blog itself, i've kinda been in a weird spot with it for a while. i've been scraping by on here intermittently for the entire year on and off, and i might have some ways to help keep me on top of the ball during the next year, but i also do wonder how long i can really keep doing this, and how long people will still like weirdcore and my work in particular. i've been considering branching out in terms of my presentation, or format, or style, but i feel incredibly weird about doing so.

in my personal life, this is the year i finally started transitioning and seeking treatment for my most pressing issues. i've finally started dating the love of my life, my best friend of 10 years, and despite some interpersonal turmoil all around me, i think i'm finally finding safe ground and knowing what i wanna do next. i don't really talk about it on here because i'm very private about it, but i've been kinda slowly becoming like a Real Adult Person this year. i didn't really have much of a chance to prior and i still am struggling a lot, but hey i know what i want now!

it's really silly to say but this blog still means a lot to me! it's seen me through the craziest times in my entire life, it's brought me so much perspective and knowledge and opportunities i wouldn't've had otherwise. i wake up every day and go on here and never stop feeling starstruck that people chose to follow me. i know tumblr success means nothing but to me it's the only community i've ever actually belonged to, so thank you all.

ok so like i really just don't have much else to say anymore, so i think i'll end it there! thank you all again, i can't wait for year 4 as it's going to definitely be a crazy one lol. let's hope it's a good one too!

[rainbowdaisy13]

Hey Rainbow, I'm kind of a new Kaylor. I knew of their existence back in 2016, but I wasn't part of this corner of Tumblr. It's only in the last few months that I've really become interested in Taylor's lyrics and the Kaylor storyline. The idea that she's closeted and struggling, and the beautiful and romantic tapestry of her lyrics that speak of a truly beautiful love story that the public doesn't really know about, these are the things that drew me to Taylor and by extension Kaylor. I know that the stuff with TK is PR. Dare I say it's the loudest and most obvious PR she's ever done. I know this, but it's actually getting painful to see it. I guess it's painful to see such a smart, articulate, and worldly woman be so happy in the company of the frattiest of frat bros. Or maybe it's hard to see her associate with them. Idk. I'm not here to attack her or anyone, but I guess I'm coming to you for a pep talk? I know this doesn't make me a good fan, but I'm not sure I'd like TS as much if I didn't think she was a closeted queer woman. I imagine I should take a break, but I fear that if everyone does that, will the Kaylor corner disappear? Will the comfort we find in Gaylor evaporate? I swear I'm a grown adult with a robust and fulfilling real life, but damn...this is getting to me.

Anyway, sorry for the novel. I hope it's not too annoying. You're so steadfast of a fan, and it seemed like you'd be the best to reach out to for support, ha.

First, never apologize!! Second welcome to Kaylor tumblr! Tis not for the faint of heart!

This is all I can give you in the way of a pep talk—I fully believe Taylor is a queer woman and that she’s been telling us that through art her since the very beginning. I also believe her and Karlie are in a long term secret relationship that they are choosing to keep hidden through Bearding and Lavender marriage for whatever reasons they have—and I’m sure there’s a ton of reasons that they have deemed good enough

As far as being a bad fan, absolutely not! I did not give a crap about Taylor until Rep. I knew of her songs but something about her always felt off to me, and disingenuous. Someone mentioned the word Kaylor and I went down the tumblr rabbithole of TTB and BOOM I was hooked. Taylor as a closeted queer artist made sooooo much sense to me as I always felt something was missing about her as a person, and suddenly here was this insane amount of evidence that only kept growing! It’s not like I joined during Rep and had to only look in the past, she continues to keep queer signaling in every aspect of her life. Thats a long way to say, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with loving Taylor for who she actually is—that doesn’t make you a bad fan for seeing her truth and loving her for it

As far as Kaylor tumblr disappearing, in the last 7 years I’ve been here, my follower count only grows. SO many people lurk in this space. There will always be some of us here documenting and discussing while others of us take breaks. We are pretty good about holding down the fort for each other in times of stress

Come and go as you need to, but us battle hardened OGs shall remain until she stops signaling through her art that she wants us to know the truth

[unhonestlymirror]

I realised what I felt when I was a kid and watched hetalia fandom from afar.

It felt like watching my own country, my land being raped. I just didn't look at it. It was none of my business, I said. It's just a stupid manga, I said, just several hundreds of idiots. It has nothing to do with reality, I said. I already knew how russkiy mir looked like in Belarus and what russkiy mir did to my mom, but I just wanted to live in my little peaceful real world.

I didn't look at it because it simply was unbearable to look at. Although, I myself did not fully understand why.

Then russkiy mir knocked to my home. I still forbid myself to remember my home, I will think about it tomorrow, I say. I suddenly realised myself in Lithuania, going to studies in a different institution, different people, different language, choir, swords, I have no idea what I am doing and I am scared, dances, activities, posting art on tumblr. Life was good. Life was actually really good. Way better than in Ukraine. The issue was that I still wanted to die, which was terribly unfair to people who tried so hard to make me feel better, and I still was losing weight, hair, sleep, health. I couldn't remember when I ate the last time, what I ate. I couldn't remember the names of people I've learned mere minutes ago. I couldn't smell my own sweaty and dirty clothes. I couldn't see the dust on my floor and my dirty dishes. I didn't feel physical pain. I didn't feel cold. I didn't feel hunger until I was losing consciousness. I've cried a lot for no reason at all, publicly, though. Time has stopped.

There was something that prevented me from healing.

That was the moment I stopped writing the sentimental memoirs about my family and wrote "Lithuania", "Ukraine" in tumblr search for the first time.

And then I met my greatest enemy face to face for the first time, under the tags of the only things in the world, which give me the meaning of life.

My greatest enemy gave me a reason to live on. My greatest enemy gave me the opportunity to pour out my hatred in a healthy way. My mom, after all, poured it out via domestic violence. Watching people drawing my countries being russia's sisters, I didn't feel such big hatred even when my family was shelled with russian missiles. It was such a great hatred that it replaced my love for Jujutsu Kaisen, family calls, guitar and other stuff that used to bring me joy, but moreover, it replaced my apathy.

Then I started drawing hetalia fanart. I didn't want to be Stierlitz from the famous anecdotes. I didn't plan to make any friends here. I came here with a drawn sword for a specific purpose and desire to protect my land. Honestly, I am still surprised I managed to make friends here. For me, hetalia is on the same level as kremlin in terms of the degree of pollution. But I guess, it's just another proof that good people can be found anywhere, even in the educational ass of the world.

Then I learned about rusliet, and for the first time since I've left my home, I felt fear. Lithuania is everything I have, it's my Tara, and I am Scarlett. I have no other place to go. It's the land whom I love dearly and whom I want to see happy and blooming. Lithuanians in hetalia don't feel what I feel when seeing rusliet because they didn't experience what I did, and I pray to God for things staying that way.

I promised myself that I would be careful, but I would never, never ignore people offending my land and putting it in danger. You come to my land with malice in your heart or with zero thoughts in your brain - you leave with my sword sticking out of your ass.

I am worried that training this community turns me into a monster myself. I hope I don't look like a monster to my friends. Sometimes, I act like one to my family, and then I feel the great guilt, but they got used to that the same way I got used to my mom breaking plates. Although I've come here with great hatred and anger, I still can't find any malice in my heart, and I still don't receive any satisfaction from causing pain.

You can say hetalia is my destiny, just like gaining Lithuania. I finally understood what love for one’s land is. I perceive Lithuania as my land as well, and I will gnaw the throat of anyone who dares to take it from me.

I have the goal in life: to protect my land, to protect the people I love, even if I never manage to become myself again.