#i want fics where she's able to trust someone at least a little

[vieramars]

I almost forgot about that Gertrude post cause it went kind of under the radar but now it's blowing up my notes

[hayakawalove]

Test of Love

Chapter One

Summary: Day in and day out, your routine has been exactly the same as a jujutsu sorcerer. You can't complain, honestly. You just wish things were a little more interesting. When you get propositioned by two men, you have no choice but to see what they have going on. Joining a relationship would spice things up, wouldn't it?

A/N: I've had this idea loosely floating around my brain for a bit. Fret not, my short fics will continue but I wanted to write this too. I hope you enjoy it! Thank you!

CW: Slight blood, there's no smut this chapter W/C: 5,560

Credit to @benkeibear for the banner

‘The clouds part, a ray of sunlight shining down on the pair.’

Your eyes glide over the page, fingers strumming the back of the book. 

“What’re you reading?” Gojo’s voice startles you from the scene you had built in your head based on the words in front of you. 

You jump in your seat, turning to see him leaning against your desk. It was no surprise he was here, he often came and went whenever he pleased. But he could have at least knocked. 

“A Trial of Lovers.” You respond, bringing your eyes back to the words in front of you. 

“Sounds boring.” 

You hum, intent on not paying him any mind. Gojo could be a handful, but he wasn’t that hard to manage once you got to know him. You just learned to tune him out. 

“Why aren’t you paying attention to your students? Reckless of you.” He continues. 

Maybe you wouldn’t be able to ignore him. 

“They’re just studying today.” You say, turning the page. 

The room is quiet besides the two of you, the four students either glued to their textbooks or watching the interaction unfold in front of them. 

“A book can be a weapon. And you have a very talented weapon user in case you were unaware.” 

“Salmon.” Inumaki agrees. He always did like stirring up trouble. 

“What if she tries to kill Yuuta with it?” Gojo says, clearly trying to get a rouse out of you. 

“Maki, are you gonna try killing Yuuta with your textbook?” You ask, keeping your eyes trained down. 

“Not unless he pisses me off.” 

“What?” Yuuta responds. 

You look up at Gojo and smile. 

“Yuuta’s harmless, he wouldn’t piss her off so I think we’re good.” 

“Harmless? I wouldn’t call him that.” Gojo responds. 

“Where are your students?” You accuse. 

He was much more lax with his, often leaving them to fend for themselves when he went on missions. You couldn’t say you blamed him. It wasn’t like he had much of a choice, but still. 

“I sent them out to take care of a second grade. They’ll be fine, Megumi is with them.” 

You clear your throat, eyes focused on the book in front of you even though you were no longer reading. 

“He’s still a child.” Even as you speak, your nerves feel more at ease. If you were to trust any of the students, it would be Megumi. Even if that was the case, you still thought they shouldn’t be left alone. Gojo trusted Megumi which was good, but it bugged you that he may have trusted him a bit too much. Even the greatest sorcerers make mistakes, much less ones that were under 18. 

“And Nobara is just as, if not more violent than Maki. What if she kills Yuuji?” You knew she wouldn’t. 

“She wouldn’t do that.” Gojo responds slyly. 

You slap your book closed and set it on the desk in front of you. 

“What do you want, Gojo?” 

Your eyes flick across his body. His blindfold was on like usual, his ensemble completely put together as it always was. You would pay to see him look unprepared. 

“Are you busy after school?” He smiles, his body relaxed as he stares down at you. 

This was something he always did. Flirt with you, while you ignored his advances. It was the nature of your friendship, it didn’t bother you so much as it might bother someone else. 

“Class, you guys can leave early.” You announce, smiling as you watch them hop out of the room. 

You stand up and face Gojo again. He was wearing a cocky grin, no doubt waiting for your response. He thought you would say yes, even though you denied him every time. You weren’t opposed to going out with him, there were just other factors in the mix. 

“Gojo, in case you forgot you have a boyfriend.” 

Gojo huffs and leans back even more, seemingly prepared for your rejection. 

“I didn’t forget. We’re trying something new. Open relationship. He gets to see who he wants and I can see who I want.” 

The response stuns you a bit. He had never mentioned that before. The offer seemed more appealing at his revelation. You had fun with Gojo, and he was good looking. You just didn’t want to be the reason he was kicked on the streets. 

It seems he knows that he’s wearing you down, his grin showing back up. 

“Come on, let’s just go for a walk around the park. Promise I don’t bite. Unless you’re into that, of course.” 

An image conjures up in your mind before you can stop it. One where he’s on top of you, mouth open as he nibbles on your neck. You shake your head, trying to rid the naughty thought as best as you could. You awkwardly chuckle and grab your things, following him out the door. A walk would be harmless, wouldn’t it? 

The weather graced you today it seems, as clear skies shine above you and an acceptable temperature wraps around your body. You were at a park near the school, one that had lots of families and several street vendors. 

You actually were hungry. And Gojo being Gojo decided to jump at the opportunity to buy something sweet, assuring you that he would buy your food as well. 

While you wait, you find a lonely bench sitting in the middle of the park. It’s surrounded by large trees, trees much older than you. It’s refreshing to be out of the school for once. You can’t remember the last time you spent a normal day out in society. 

You loved your job, but it could be exhausting at times. 

“Order up!” Gojo’s cheery voice interrupts your thoughts. 

He’s holding two crepes. One with fruit, the other with chocolate. 

“We can share if you want.” He says, holding the fruit one out to you, mouth darting out to bite into his. 

You smile up at him and grab the treat, eyes flicking over the colors that lit up the food. When you take a bite you taste berries melting with whip cream, the flavor swirling around your mouth. 

“This is really good Gojo, thank you.” 

He offers a serene smile as he takes another bite of his crepe while sitting next to you. Chocolate decorates his lip and you giggle in response. He almost looked childish. It suited him, in a way. People might say he was immature, which wouldn’t really be wrong, but a part of you knew he grew up too fast. 

You make idle chatter as you watch families fill in the park. You spent so much time around sorcerers, you often forgot what it was like to be near normal people. Their carefree attitudes lit up your heart, putting your mind at ease. 

This is what you’re doing it for, this is why you fight. You remind yourself as you watch a toddler topple over before getting right back up, a grin across his face. 

“It’s weird, right?” You find yourself saying. 

You haven’t finished your crepe yet, but Gojo has been done with his for awhile; focusing on the brown syrup that muddled his fingers. 

He hums as he licks his finger, looking up in front of him. 

“The families. The smiles. The people.” 

You don’t have to elaborate, Gojo knows exactly what you mean. Sorcerers rarely have families and rarely smile. Their lifestyles were much different than yours. Your stomach turns as you wait for his response. 

“Yeah, I mean I guess so. It’s not much weirder than sorcerers.” 

You didn’t really expect him to feel the same way as you. He may look like an average man, but he wasn’t. While you couldn’t relate to average people, he couldn’t relate to anyone. Not people or sorcerers. 

Lonely, you thought. You wonder if the feeling keeps him up late at night. 

“Thank you for taking me out. This is nice.” You settle, attempting to divert your attention from the macabre. 

Gojo leans back, kicking his long legs out in front of him. His arms spread out on the bench, head facing the sky. He always took up so much space, not that you minded. You figured the world was too small for him, so you didn’t mind making more room. 

“It is, isn’t it?” 

You offer up a bite of your crepe which he gladly accepts, swallowing before saying he preferred his more. 

“I actually had something I wanted to bring up. You’ll learn about it later in the next meeting, but I figured I’d tell you now.” 

Your head perks up in interest, your attention completely on him. 

“There’s been a slew of random attacks at the school.” 

The words sink in your chest, creating a pool in your stomach. The school? That was your sacred place. Your home. It was all you had. 

“The school? I haven’t heard anything.” 

“Not really at the school, more so around it. They’ve been happening at frequent intervals the past week all within 5 miles of the school. It’s all been small attacks. But it definitely is something. One wouldn’t be a big deal, but with the amount that’s been happening… someone is definitely targeting Jujutsu High. Not enough to actually destroy it but enough to peak our interest.” 

As much as you hated to admit it, he was right. It wouldn’t have mattered if it only happened a couple of times, but there was a pattern. Someone was clearly focusing on the school. 

“What does it mean?” 

Gojo taps his foot, his head in the clouds. If anyone knew what it was about, it would be him. 

“I’m not sure. It’s been relatively easy to handle so far. I’m just worried about the fact it draws our attention away. The more people we send out to watch the border means the less available sorcerers we’ll have. I don’t like it.” 

He rarely sounds serious, but you’re able to pick up on the dark underlying tone in the way he’s talking right now. He didn’t seem too stressed out, maybe inconvenienced at best. It wasn’t like there was much you could do at the current moment anyway. 

You finish your crepe, the mood dramatically shifting after the conversation. You hate to see Gojo like this, his mind swarmed with thoughts and unable to focus on anything else. 

“So, tell me about your boyfriend.” 

Gojo raises his head and looks at you, one of his eyebrows shooting up. 

“Weird thing to bring up on a date.” 

You scoff and nudge your foot against his. 

“If I’m gonna be apart of this I wanna know more about you.” 

Gojo’s eyes flick up as if in deep thought. You didn’t know much about his boyfriend. He and Gojo were longtime friends, having gone to Jujutsu High together. Over the years you learned he was the more responsible of the two. You also learned about his cursed technique. Rare and strong, curse manipulation. You were intrigued by the idea. Using what you fight against to help you, it was nothing short of incredible. 

“He’s nice. Almost too nice. He understands people more than me. Really strong too. A bit stern.” 

You keep your gaze focused on the side of Gojo’s face. You don’t spend much time looking at him normally, so you take advantage of the closeness you have right now to appreciate him. His white eyelashes flutter as he looks at the sky, bright pink lips parted as he speaks. 

Handsome, he was so very handsome. 

As the two of you were in public he decided to forego his blindfold and instead use a pair of sunglasses. His hair lay messy atop his head, but it still looked good. 

He cracks a grin as he notices you staring. 

“See something you like?” 

You quickly turn forward, the act of being caught embarrassing you. The only thing worse than an attractive man was a man who was attractive and knew it. 

“He sounds nice. Nicer than you.” You say, hoping to annoy him. 

Instead, Gojo lets out a quiet sigh. 

“He is.” 

It was odd to see him like this. Gojo cared for people, he wasn’t a robot, but he rarely admired them. With the few conversations you had with him you were able to tell he admired his boyfriend, he really loved him. 

Your lips part as you start to ask Gojo what his boyfriend's name was, but his phone cuts you off. 

Gojo clicks his tongue and looks down, noting a text from Yaga. 

“Can’t even leave for a few hours.” He complains under his breath. 

You know he’s trying to put on a show, but you can’t help but feel bad. He was right. He never had time to himself, always being forced into doing something or the other for the higher ups. His life wasn’t truly his own. 

Your relationship with Gojo was complicated. You liked to tease him, but deep down you knew he always got the shit end of the stick. 

You stand up, swiping your hands on your pants. It was starting to get hot out, your hair sticking to your neck.  You reach a hand out to Gojo, wordlessly offering help. 

He smirks at your hand, looking over the top of his glasses. 

“Cute.” 

You tear your hand away, not wanting to give him the satisfaction if he was just going to tease you. 

“Hey! What if I need help getting up?” 

“Stand up yourself, worlds strongest sorcerer.” You mumur, stepping away to start walking towards the school. 

Gojo whines behind you before jumping up, jogging towards you. The rest of the walk goes by fast, the both of you teasing each other back and forth. One of the good things about Gojo, although there were many (not that you would admit it), was that he was incredibly fun to talk to. As long as you were in the mood, of course. 

Your body chills when you step inside the school. The air conditioning soothes your skin the second you get inside. 

“You’re back.” Yaga says, looking down, shuffling papers back and forth. 

“Sadly.” Gojo responds. 

“What were you two up to?” 

“A date.” Gojo says confidently. 

You train your face to say neutral but you feel your blood simmer. You weren’t exactly planning on telling Yaga, but of course Gojo wouldn’t keep it to himself. 

“And Geto?” Yaga asks. 

Geto. That was Gojo’s boyfriend's name. His last name anyway. You wanted to know what his first name was, that’s what you were planning on asking before Yaga texted. 

“He’s aware.” 

Yaga heaves out a breath, used to Gojos antics by now. Anything that could be weird by someone else’s standards was considered normal if Gojo was the one doing it. 

“I need you to finish this paperwork before going home tonight. And don’t make someone else do it for you.” Yaga hands you both a stack of papers, aiming the last half of the sentence to Gojo. 

You knew it wouldn’t take you long, as long as Gojo didn’t attempt to get you to do his for him. Even if he asked nicely you were going to refuse. You had plans tonight. You needed to go to the book store to get the second book to the one you were reading this morning. 

It takes you two hours and your fingers are sore by the time you’re done, but you manage to finish all your paperwork. Halfway through you had to lock Gojo out so you could focus. You had fun on your date, but tonight was your night. A man wasn’t going to get in the way of that. 

~~~

You weren’t sure what happened to the weather. This morning when you were with Gojo it was bright and sunny, but now the sky was littered with clouds. You didn’t mind it, in fact you preferred it. When you were reading you much preferred for it to rain, finding it way more soothing. 

The bookstore was empty today, except for a couple of people that hid out in the shelves. You liked it here. It made you feel somewhat normal. There were no sorcerers, curses, or villains here. Just books. 

You had no plans for the rest of the night, besides having you time, so you decide to find the book you’re looking for to read there. There were chairs littered throughout the building, each soft and worn down after years of use. 

Curling up on a chair, you open your book and dive into it. The words capture all your attention as you grip the front and back of the book. It’s much better than the first, you think. The author has such a way with words. You’re so engrossed you don’t notice a man approaching you. 

He sits on the chair in front of yours, his own book nestled in his lap.

“That’s a good book,” he says. 

You look up to find a man sitting in front of you. He looked perfect. There wasn’t flaw on his body. 

Long black hair that was pulled up in a bun, caramel eyes trained on you as he wore a small smile. 

Normally, you would be pissed off that someone was breaking the bookstore code ‘no talking’, but you weren’t. You were drawn in. 

“It is.” You respond, trying to look away from him but finding yourself incapable. 

“I love the author, I finished all his books so I was here looking for something else.” 

You think you could listen to him speak forever, the way his voice rolls out from his lips causes your body to relax. 

“Me too, once I finish this then I’ll be done.” 

His smile spreads wider. Your stomach turns under his gaze. 

“I’m afraid I haven’t found any stories as interesting as his.” He continues. “I really liked his use of butterflies in that book though. Very beautiful.” 

You bite your lip and tear your eyes away if only for a second to gain control. 

“Me too.” 

He watches the way you fiddle with the book in your lap. 

“My name is Suguru, what’s yours?” 

You take a deep breath before telling him your name. Normal girls would be scared of a stranger talking to them, but you weren’t normal. You were sure if it came down to it you would be able to take care of him. After all, there were very few people stronger than you, and you were on a date with one of them earlier. 

You weren’t scared of Suguru, you were captivated by him. 

His smile morphs into something more calming after you speak. It sends fireworks off in your stomach. 

“You have a lovely name.” 

You clear your throat before darting your eyes away, unable to look at him any longer. 

“Thank you.” You murmur, fiddling with your outfit. 

After work you had gone home to switch clothes, wanting something more comfortable. You were glad you did, as the clothes you wore now were much more flattering. A loose sweater with yoga pants, perfect for lounging about while you read. 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt you, I apologize. I just saw what you were reading.” 

“It’s okay, is this your first time here? I’ve never seen you before.” 

Suguru wets his bottom lip, and you have to pry your eyes away from it. 

“It is. Normally I go to a bookstore in the next town over, but it’s under renovations so I decided to come here. It’s not far from my boyfriends work.” 

Ah. 

There it is. 

You don’t know why you expected anything different. Part of you was hoping he might be hitting on you. You did go on a date with Gojo earlier, but it wasn’t anything serious. 

“What do you do for work?” You ask. 

“I’m a freelancer.” 

Vague, you think. 

“And you?” 

There’s no way you can tell him you’re a jujutsu sorcerer so you settle on something close enough. 

“I’m a teacher.” 

“Noble, I like it.” 

The rain beats down on the roof of the book store, water running down the windows making it hard to see outside. It’s calming, Suguru is calming. You keep your gaze focused on him as the two of you talk. At first you were almost intimidated, but you were slowly getting used to the heat of his gaze. 

“I enjoyed the butterflies as well. It’s a shame we don’t have them around here. I’d love to watch them like they did in the book.” You say. 

“It’s probably because of all the people. There are places you can go to see them, would you be interested?” 

You pause and stare at him. Was that… A date invitation? 

It wasn’t, there was no way. 

Maybe he meant it in a friendly way. 

“What about your boyfriend? I would love to, but I just want to make sure before I agree.” 

You’d hate to get the wrong idea. 

“He’ll be okay with it. I can ask though if you want me to.” 

You fiddle with your shirt and watch as he pulls out his phone. Suguru types a quick message, not even a second later his phone vibrates with an answer. 

He turns the screen towards you, letting you read the words. 

Suguru: I’m gonna go on a date with this girl from the book store

Asshole: Alright

Asshole: Is she hot? 

Suguru: She’s beautiful 

Your heart stutters at the compliment, your curiosity slightly piqued at the name in his phone. Asshole? Maybe that wasn’t that weird. 

“Would you be free tomorrow?” He asks while sliding his phone away.

“Yeah, as long as it’s after I get off.”

“Nice, I can pick you up or we can meet here?” 

You trusted him, but you wanted to get to know him more before bringing him back to your house. 

“Let’s meet here?” 

“Okay. What’s your number?” 

You give him your number and he shares his. It’s close to closing time once you finish so you decide to head home, the encounter with Suguru still fresh on your mind. 

He seemed normal. Not in a bad way, but normal nonetheless. You mostly interacted with sorcerers, so going on a date with someone who wasn’t one felt weird. You wouldn’t have to be worried about work or anything else. You would be able to have average conversations. 

You couldn’t wait. 

~~~

You feel giddy when you wake up the next day. Your date would be later in the afternoon and you were having a hard time containing yourself. All you had to do was get by the day, which wouldn’t be hard. There was a small mission you had to take Inumaki and Panda on, but after that you would be free. 

As you stood there you watched the two of them work, paying attention to their form so you could give pointers after. It donned on you how odd it really was. 

If Suguru asked you what you did today were you supposed to tell him you fought monsters with a personified panda? 

Yeah, you would have to keep that to yourself. 

You would have been able to keep it all to yourself, that is until Panda accidentally scratches you with his paw, causing blood to leak from your cheek. You lecture him to pay attention to his surroundings as the red liquid pours from your face. It takes the rest of the ride home for it to stop bleeding, and the throbbing pain doesn’t go away. You were gonna have to figure out how to explain that to Suguru. 

The second the work day is done, you’re rushing home to put together your outfit. Suguru didn’t tell you really what to wear, only advising that it should be something light as you would be spending time outside. You settle on a flowy dress that cut off above your knees, you actually felt cute. 

You leave your house early, intent on arriving before Suguru to make a good impression. Unfortunately for you, it seems Suguru had the same plan. 

You check your phone, you had arrived ten minutes early and Suguru was already leaning against the bookstore, looking comfortable as he slouches. 

“I’m sorry! Were you waiting long?” 

Suguru looks up from his phone at the sound of your voice. His eyes drag across your figure, the action making the hair on your neck stand on edge. Those eyes. Were you ever going to get used to them? 

His lips quirk up in a small smile, putting his phone away. He was wearing a black shirt with black sweatpants, his hair half up, the top pinned behind his head. 

“No, I just got here,” 

You find that hard to believe. 

“You look amazing.” He finishes. 

You try to stave off the embarrassment, waving your hand. When Suguru walks up to you, you finally notice how huge he is. He was tall, with a structure that took your breath away. 

You wonder what he did to stay in shape. 

“What happened to your cheek?” His voice is dripping with concern, brows furrowed as he raises his hand up. His thumb brushes on the skin below your cut. 

“Oh! Um, one of my students was a bit reckless today. It didn’t hurt all that much.” 

His eyes dance across your face, digesting your answer before dropping his hand. He looked genuinely concerned. It was cute. He must’ve been the protective type. 

“I see. I’m sorry that happened.” He sounds remorseful even though he wasn’t the one to cause it. “Are you ready?” 

And with that the two of you set off. Suguru told you he was showing you a place with butterflies, and you weren’t quite sure what he meant by that. Excitement bubbles in your veins as you walk. 

The entire time he spoke you couldn’t help but put all your undivided attention on him. He was magnetizing. A natural born speaker, you thought. 

Suguru must notice your silence as he stops himself from talking. 

“My bad, I’m rambling.” 

“No! Not at all. I like listening, you have a soothing voice.” 

“Well thank you.” Pink dust settles on his cheeks. 

As you inch closer to your destination, your fingers brush against his, the movement causing your heart to race. 

Would it be weird to ask him if you could hold his hand? 

“We’re here.” Suguru stops in front of a building. It was a bit unassuming, grey concrete walls and few windows. 

There were butterflies here? 

Suguru notices your expression and chuckles. 

“Trust me.” 

You can’t find it in your heart to doubt him. 

He leads you inside, walking up to the front desk where a middle aged woman is standing by a computer. Her eyes are kind, hands weathered as she types. 

“Can we get two tickets for the observatory?” 

You fidget behind Suguru, appreciating the length of his hair cascading down his back. 

You kind of wanted to touch it. 

“Of course! Here you go sweetheart.” The lady digs around, grabbing two tickets while Suguru pulls out cash. 

The exchange is over as soon as it started, and Suguru is leading you down a long hallway. When he pushes the doors open at the end of it, you’re greeted by fresh air, a short path leading to a giant glass dome. It’s hard to see on the inside of it, but it looks like it’s filled with plants. 

“Let’s go.” He says with a grin, reaching his hand out towards you. 

Your heart skips a beat at the gesture. You grab his hand, interlacing your fingers together. He’s warm. His palm the perfect mix between soft and calloused. His long fingers don’t get past your attention either. Suguru pulls you along to the dome, holding the door open for you. 

When you step inside you’re hit with an overwhelming fragrance. It smelled like a mix between soil and flowers, the sweet scent covering you completely. 

It’s nothing short of amazing. There’s plants everywhere, you had never been to a jungle before but you were sure this is what it would look like. 

“Suguru, this is…” 

“Look!” He urges, pointing up. 

You snap your head up, following the direction of his finger. Above you was a small colony of monarch butterflies, maybe twenty of them flying around. They were low enough that you were able to appreciate the brightness of their wings, orange hues darting around as they flew. 

Your lips part in amazement and you’re unable to tear your gaze away. You were sure you had never seen anything this beautiful before. 

“Amazing, right?”

Suguru’s smooth voice floats over to you, snapping you back to him. When you turn around to look at him, his eyes are already on you. His mouth is spread in a soft grin, eyes twinkling as he looks down at you. 

“This is perfect, Suguru. How did you find this place?”

“After I read the book we were talking about I just had to know what it felt like to be surrounded by butterflies so I did some digging and found it. I come here every so often, although it’s been awhile since I have. I figured it would be more fun if I brought someone with me. I was right.” His eyes are glued on your smile as you look away, following the butterflies with your eyes. 

You find a walkway and set a slow pace, stopping every so often to read the metal plaques that were placed about, explaining the different types of flora and butterflies. You weren’t entirely sure what you were expecting, but it definitely wasn’t this. Your chest swelled with joy as you went on, listening as Suguru read you the plaques. 

“It really is magical, just like it was in the book. Thank you.” You can’t hide the vulnerability from your voice. 

Suguru’s eyes crinkle when he smiles, a cute habit you noticed, and he squeezes your hand. 

“Of course, thank you for joining me.” 

The two of you spend several hours there, a leisurely pace set between you. It was hard to want to go home when you knew the world outside was this beautiful. You wonder if colors will seem dull compared to this place. You were betting on it. 

When families begin to filter in you both decide to head out. You were glad kids were gonna experience the same joy you had, but you wanted more privacy with Suguru, even if you had to go home soon. If you could spend more time with him, you would. Unfortunately duty calls and you had work early in the morning, effectively cutting your date much shorter than you would have liked. 

Much like yesterday's date. 

You agree to let him walk you back home, if only to spend as much time together as possible. He never let go of your hand ever since the observatory, and you were grateful for it. His large palm provided some sense of protection, relief you didn’t know you needed. 

Your apartment comes into view far quicker than you were hoping. You could have lived on campus, but you instead opted to find a place elsewhere. Jujutsu High was your home, but you wanted to be able to separate yourself from it occasionally. You were able to find an apartment for a decent price, only staying there to sleep and change. Every so often when it was too late, you crashed in a dorm at the school, but you made sure to keep those occurrences low. 

“This is it.” You sigh out, turning to face Suguru. 

“I had fun today.” He stops and looks down at you, his body relaxed as he addresses you. 

“I did too! Maybe we can hang out again sometime?” 

Kiss me, kiss me, you internally beg. 

Your eyes focus on the way his lips morph as he talks. 

“I’d love that.” 

Please, kiss me. 

Suguru keeps your hand in his as he leans down, placing his lips gently on your forehead. 

Oh. 

That was different, yet it made your heart beat faster than a normal kiss would have. The intimacy of it all struck you like a freight train. No one had given you a forehead kiss before. His lips linger for a moment, before he’s pulling away all too soon. 

“I’ll call you?” 

Your throat squeezes as you try to force words out, but you’re all too flustered. 

“I’ll be waiting.” You say, trying to seem cool. 

Suguru chuckles softly before letting go of your hand. Your palm feels chilly the second he lets go. You’ll see him again, you remind yourself. Hopefully. 

You force yourself to make your way to your door, body trembling in excitement. It felt like you took all the butterflies home with you, their wings fluttering inside your chest as you close the door behind you. After a couple of deep breaths you’re able to cool down, although you still felt a tingle on your forehead where his lips were. 

Two dates in two days, not too bad. 

Hopefully the momentum will stay strong.

As you get ready for bed, you replay the events of the past two days over in your head, your heart swelling with exhilaration. When you drift off to sleep, your dreams are filled with crepes and butterflies. 

Tag List: @tojislittleprincesss, @dinolvrrr, @kimi01985, @constawrites

If you want to be added to the taglist just let me know, please specify if you want to be added for all my works or just this fic

[littlejuicebox]

LittleJuicebox Masterlist

Click here for my AO3 account. (Converting is a WiP).

If you’d like to be added to a tag list, please DM me and I can send you the google doc link. I have decided to keep tag lists for each individual series so you only get tagged in the ones you want.

My personal favorites are denoted by a +.

GN reader is denoted by a * otherwise assume Fem reader/OC.

Titles colored red are smut or other mature themes, 18+ only.

AstarionxWren Series:

This is a canon-adjacent passion project which focuses on Astarion and Wren, a ranger half-elf with her own backstory. She is based off my first Tav. Do you like angsty slow burns where two broken people find one another and learn to love again? Then this one is for you.

Chapter 1 / Chasing birds to get high (PG) + Chapter 2 / Between comfort and chaos (PG) Chapter 3 / Sunshine and midnight rain (PG13) + Chapter 4 / Protect the flames (M/Gore) Chapter 5 / Blue and silver bonded (PG13) Chapter 6 / Remember how it feels to have a heartbeat (PG13) Chapter 7 / Give peace a chance (M/Smut) + Chapter 8 / Dancing in a burning room (M/Gore) Chapter 9 / Lavender haze (PG-PG13?) Chapter 10 / I want to hold your hand (PG13)

Midnight Chimes Series:

Your parents own a tavern in Baldur’s Gate, and Astarion was somewhat of a regular when you worked at the bar in your younger years. You don’t exactly trust him. Now you’re an apothecary owner based in Waterdeep, and when the two of you crash on the beach, you aren’t exactly thrilled to see him there, too. But things aren’t always what they seem.

1 / The Prologue +

2 / Three years

3 / Luck +

4/ Ringleader

Midwinter Carol Series:

Eirianwen and Astarion were in love before the Ascension ritual changed his behavior toward her. She refused to become a spawn, and they went their separate ways. The story starts when they run into one another fifteen years later; Eirianwen returned to the city to deliver some news to the pale elf. Meanwhile, the Ascendant had a night time visitor that convinced him to change his ways, and he believes his ex-lover might be the key. Will he be able to change after fifteen years of living life as a debauched degenerate?

1 / The Prologue +

2 / The Barrier

3 / The Carriage

4 / The Auction +

5/ The Repeat

6/ The Affliction

7/ The Interrogation

8/ The Scheme

9/ The Snake

AstarionxReader One Shots and Mini-Stories:

Mini-Stories are grouped together in order and denoted by a “Part X” in sequential order after the title. These are in general "timeline" order and follow my (admittedly self-indulgent) headcanon for Spawn Astarion x Tav but can definitely be read as OneShots. All stories are AstarionxReader, some allusions to reader having spellcaster ability but otherwise no real description apart from being female in about 3/4 of the fics.

Act 1-2:

The little things.

Before someone steals your queen

Act 3:

Drunken nights*+

The nail salon

You'll stay still, won't you, little love? +

Post-BG3:

Mermaid whiskey+

Baking Cookies*

Astarion talks in his sleep Part 1*+

My Sun, My Moon Part 2+

Glowing in the Underdark+

Reflections on one year of marriage

Highharvestide Part 1

Highharvestide Part 2

Handmade+

Dadstarion:

The wish spell worked.+

Daddy?

Little bump.

Labor and joy

Skin to skin.

Milk.+

Little lockpick.

Beach babies.+

A growing brood.

Puppy love.

Stuck.

Pre-BG3 / Random / Ascended Astarion OneShots

Midnight chimes / The Original One Shot

Pre-BG3. You’ve known Astarion for years… or at least, you’ve known of him. You think he’s a rake, but one night he changes your mind. The series "Midnight Chimes" started based off this "prologue."

A Midwinter Carol / The Original One Shot

“A Christmas Carol” but Ascended Astarion is Scrooge. He sees you after your break up 15 years ago, and then has an unexpected nighttime visitor showing him past, present, and future. Will he be convinced to change his ways? The series "Midwinter Carol" started based off this "prologue."

Naughty or Nice?

You’re Ascended Astarion’s little toy in the middle of a party. TLDR; he’s tease and a BDSM dom.

Dancing on my own

[acewritesfics]

In the Past | Tommy Shelby

⚠️ THIS IS A REPOST FROM MY MAIN BLOG @/DLMLUFICS. UNFORTUNATELY, I HAVE TO DO IT THIS WAY. MORE INFO IN MY PINNED POST

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Request: from @runnning-outof-time

Fic Type: Blurb

Warnings: Angst

Word Count: 713

TOMMY SHELBY MASTERLIST || TAG LIST SIGN-UP

“We need to start being honest with each other as well as ourselves,” Y/N stands before Tommy as he sits behind his desk. “And the truth is… I didn’t miss you as much as I thought I would.” 

Tommy looks at her, not showing an ounce of emotion or letting on to what is going through his head. This was the side of him she did not miss. The cool demeanour that accompanied him back from France.  

“How much did you miss me?” He asks, his voice also not giving anything away to what he’s thinking and feeling.  

“Not enough to continue where we left off,” she tells him. 

When Tommy had learned of Y/N’s return, he began to seek her out. They’d gone out for dinner a few times and spent the night in each other's company. Y/N hoped that spending time with him would reignite the flame that use to burn between them but the more time she spent with him she realised it was never going to burn again. She still cared for him, saw him as someone she could trust and rely on and supported him in any way she could.  

“You know I care for you, Tom,” she sighs, sadly. “But whatever is happening between us, it doesn’t feel right. It feels like we’re trying to relive our past. So much has changed between us that it’s just not there anymore.” 

“I understand what you’re saying,” he admits. “I feel it too.” 

Y/N reaches to the back of her neck and unclasps the necklace from around her neck. Tommy had given it to her not long before their relationship ended. She forgot she had it until recently. It once belonged to his mother who had also been like a mother to her.  

She goes to hand it back when Tommy stands up and walks out from behind his desk. He takes it from her but moves behind her to put it back on. “Keep it. You were like a daughter to her, and she would want you to still have it.” 

“But she told you to give it to the woman who steals your heart.” 

“Our relationship might not have worked out how we hoped it would, but you’ll always be the woman who stole my heart,” he admits as he turns her around to face him. 

Y/N looks down at the floor, looking and feeling guilty for not being able to bring herself to feel what she once did for him.  

Tommy places his hand under her chin and tilts her head up so she’s looking at him. “Don’t feel guilty for something you cannot control. The love we use to have for each other might be in the past, but I still care for you deeply as well.” 

Unable to think of anything more to say, Y/N wraps her arms around Tommy, hugging him knowing this might be the last time she gets to do so. She relaxes when he returns her hug.  

Eventually they let each other ago as there is a knock on the door. Tommy clears his throat and tells whoever it is to come in as Y/N collects her things to leave.  

As Polly enters her nephew's office, she greets them with a suspicious look. Y/N looks between Polly and Tommy and informs them, “I’ll be heading back to London tomorrow. Promise me you’ll call if you need anything.” 

“Same for you,” Tommy nods and tells her.  

She also nods, “It was lovely seeing you all again.” 

“It was lovely seeing you too, Y/N,” Polly speaks this time as she frowns slightly confused by what’s happening.  

Y/N gives them a brief smile before exiting Tommy’s office and going back to her mother’s house where she’d been temporarily staying. 

“What was that about?” Polly asks her nephew. She was left slightly bewildered by what just happened.  

“Sometimes things don’t work out the way we expect them too,” he tells her.  

“You’re just letting her walk away again?”  

“At least this time she’s doing it on her own terms,” he says walking back behind his desk, not letting on to his aunt that his heart is hurting a little more than it was 10 minutes again. 

TAGGED: @chapter-in-my-old-diary - @hanawrites404 - @goblinjnr - @halsteadbrasil - @forgottenpeakywriter - @star-ggirl - @iceman-kazansky - @alexxavicry - @galactict3a - @crispynutella - @il0vebeingdelulu - @nicole-19s-world

Bold means your @ didn't come up when I tried to tag you. Here's a post I found that could help if your not able to be tagged: WHY OTHERS CAN'T TAG YOUR BLOG

Sometimes your blog will be linked after posted but I don't think you get the notification. Tags have been weird lately. I might start putting the tags in the comments. Let me know if you get the notification.

[kira-broflovski]

Not So Secret || Kyle Broflovski x Reader

note: this is a follow up to this fic!! (characters are in high school)

"What'd they say?" Kyle asked, sitting on your bed while you stood in the middle of your room.

"We're gonna talk about it in the morning." You sighed out of relief.

"At least it wasn't a bad reaction."

"Very true."

You sat down next to your boyfriend and rested your head on his shoulder, finally being able to rest after Stan had walked in on you and Kyle cuddling. He was bound to tell the rest of the guys soon, so you enjoyed your peace while it lasted.

Twenty or so minutes went by, and you heard a quiet knock on the door before it was opened and your older sister, Shelly, walked in.

"Here's your guys' food." She said, setting the boxes down on the end of your bed.

"Thanks."

"Thank you." Kyle mumbled out quickly.

"Hey, don't worry about Stan, alright?" Her statement was directed towards the both of you. "He's just not over the shock, and he's protective over the both of you. Y/N being his twin, and Kyle being his best friend. He probably feels lied to or whatever. It'll be fine tomorrow, trust me."

"Oh, uh, thanks Shelly." Kyle smiled, refusing to look up at her.

"Much appreciated," you laughed softly and briefly, knowing she was right.

"Enjoy your food." With that, she turned around and left.

You and Kyle spent all night in your room, enjoying each other's presence doing absolutely anything: watching films, dancing around to music, talking. The list goes on.

Night quickly came around, so you asked if Kyle wanted to stay over for the night. Of course, he couldn't pass up the opportunity.

He quickly texted his parents he was going to be at Stan's for the night, which wasn't a total lie, before setting his phone down and refocusing all of his attention on you.

Eventually, after your night routine and finding big enough clothes for Kyle, you fell asleep in each other's arms.

Your parents had returned quite late, likely on purpose so Stan wouldn't shout at them as soon as they got in. But now, they sat in the living room, watching the morning news and eating breakfast, preparing for the conversation that needed to happen between you, Stan, and Kyle.

This should be fun.

Kyle was the first to wake up. He didn't want to wake you yet, so he stayed comfortably in your bed with his arms draped over you, enjoying your warmth. He found himself staring at you for ages. How could someone be so beautiful despite being asleep?

Stan was next to wake up. It took him a few minutes before coming to his senses, and to remember last night's outrage. Immediately, he got up and everything he did was harsh. How did he not notice you and Kyle had been dating for so long now?

Shelly was already awake, but she decided to stay in her room for now. To stay out of the way. Like she said last night, it wasn't her problem. How would mom and dad react?

Then, there was you. You slowly opened your eyes to see Kyle already staring at you like a lovesick puppy. How long had he been awake?

"Kyle?" Your voice was quiet and raspy.

"Ah, good morning Y/N." His smile widened when he realised you were actually awake.

"Morning." You said before resting your head against his chest. "You ready for today?" Your words were muffled by his chest, but he still heard you.

"As I'll ever be."

The two of you took your time getting ready, knowing the conversation needed to happen anyways. Especially after Stan's little tantrum last night.

You noticed Kyle took more time than he usually did getting ready.

"You'll be fine, babe." You smiled and walked over to where he stood in front of your mirror.

"How do you know?" He stared at himself, nit-picking every detail.

"They already like you as Stan's responsible best friend." You began. "I don't see why they wouldn't like you as my gentleman of a boyfriend."

"I guess that's true."

"It'll be fine. C'mon." You took his hand in yours and walked out of your room, making your way downstairs to the living room.

Unfortunately, your brother was the first to notice the two of you. "Are you kidding me!?"

"Don't start, Stanley." Your mother warned.

"Have a seat." Your father turned towards the two of you and motioned at the other couch, where Stan sat.

You sat down carefully next to him while Kyle sat on your other side.

"Listen, Y/N." Sharon started. "You know we try to be honest in this household, and that honesty builds trust. We aren't exactly happy you kept this relationship from us—"

"Told you guys." Stan folded his arms. He was still fuming.

"Stan." Your mother warned again, simply getting an eyeroll as a response.

"Anyways. Like I said, we aren't happy you kept it from us. However, we know Kyle, and out of anyone you could have chosen, he seems to be the best for you."

"Even though he's my best friend."

"We've noticed you've been happier these past few months," Randy added, choosing to ignore Stan's mutter.

"Exactly." Sharon nodded.

"On top of that, we know you're still doing well in school and have even seen some improvements. So we're letting it slide and even giving you guys our blessing." Randy continued. His pride shined through his words.

"You're still our little girl to us, and we want you to do well and still be happy."

"I am happy."

"Good." Your mom smiled, trying not to get sentimental.

"Although, we will have to kick your ass if you hurt her, Kyle. As much as we like you." Your dad commented, half-joking.

"I know, sir." Kyle piped up.

"Man, fuck this." Stan couldn't help but feel angry still, but more angry at himself rather than you or Kyle now.

He stood up and stormed out the front door. He needed to talk to someone, literally anyone, that would understand.

Your parents both shook their head before turning back towards you and Kyle.

"Welcome to the family, Kyle."

[devondespresso]

i was reading a scoops era steddie au where eddie visits scoops often and one thing i noticed i alway want but have yet to see (bear in mind my fic pallette is basically just shit i see on Tumblr and occasionally reading every fic a certain author has written) is a specific scene of eddie noticing stobins missing when he goes to visit them at scoops the day theyre stuck in the bunker. cause they entered the bunker after a shift one night and didn't get out until at the soonest the next afternoon right before the mall closes so if either or both of them were scheduled to work then they'd be just... gone.

and how characters around them handle that depends on how soon (if at all) they're declared missing. did robin think they'd be in-and-out in their snooping and tell her parents shes be back a little late or did she think they'd be out kinda late fucking around and just lied to her parents telling them shes sleeping over at a friend's like how we know tina was going to cover for erica? did mrs Henderson freak out when Dustin didn't bike back home (knowing what happened with will) or did she know he was with steve and trusted that they were goofing off or something?

and usually i see Steve's parents not being home but what if they were?? they could panic because steve always has some sort of excuse for why hes gone or maybe just his mom starts worrying because while his dad never really asks about him she does and she knows hes probably not at some girls house right now because he at least would have told her. or maybe mrs harrington doesn't know her son as well as she thinks she does and assumes he is out at some girls house and is relieved hes finally getting to be more like himself.

maybe just one or two people in scoops troop are reported missing that night and maybe the search started for them is enough for the other's parents or friends to realize they're all missing. maybe none of them are because they each already had a coverup with the people who'd notice. maybe they spent a good few hours in that elevator regretting lying about where they'd be because now no one knows they're in danger and by the time they start looking it could be too late (obviously erica didn't seem to grasp this yet but shes literally 10 and it's definitely her fist severely traumatic life or death experience. for the others tho it could definitely be on their minds and i have seen a few fics where robin wonders about how steve and Dustin are reacting like they've done scary shit like this before together)

then morning comes and id give it until lunch with no calls or anything before parents who believed their kids were sleeping over to start worrying seriously. maybe they call the friend their child's supposedly with and get a confused parent saying they haven't seen them or maybe they get the friend picking up and confirming they're fine (like tina). but if Mrs Henderson gets worried and calls steve she'll either get the harringtons saying he isn't home right now or she won't be able to reach him. and knowing steves like a big brother and a best friend to dustin knows that if steve missing too he's probably at least missing with him and goes to the station worried about them both

and then theres the fact that scoops has to open in the morning, probably sometime around 10am. maybe steve and robin were scheduled to both work again and as 10am comes and passes scoops ahoy hasn't been touched. maybe some mall manager calls the scoops manager (forgive me ive never worked in a mall but i do work in a store-within-a-store and we have our own manager plus the big store manager) and asks where their employees are. if missing persons reports were filed that last night then the manager would be really worried while frantically trying to find someone to cover for them. but maybe no one knows they're missing yet and their manager is grumbling about their no-shows, maybe considering firing them for both disappearing without even calling out. depending on how much they know and if the reports were filed, whoever has to cover their shifts is either worried about their coworkers (probably moreso robin than steve because of his reputation) or utterly pissed that they both didn't show and they have to open scoops ahoy with a few hours delay and probably a good few karens bitching about being closed. or maybe one or the other was scheduled and while their no-show is really inconvenient at least someone's there to open and ask for backup

and then theres steves car still parked in the back where it was the day before. a bike left behind at the mall is less eyebrow-raising but a fancy car? Steve Harrington's car? Steve Harrington who was scheduled to work today but somehow isn't in scoops right now? is he skipping work while simultaneously wandering around his workplace? and whats worse is despite evidence being there *no one can find him*. maybe thats what it takes for people to realize hes like actually missing. maybe they think he was kidnapped, hopefully he just went home with some girl and lost track of time.

and then theres eddie. eddie whos been stopping by scoops for a while now. maybe he still doesn't really like Harrington but likes teasing him with Buckley or maybe they've gotten pretty close. maybe they're already dating. maybe eddie walks up to scoops one morning to find it closed or to find that one or the other didn't show up for work this morning. maybe he hears from the worker that ones missing or maybe they get a rant about how pissed the worker is to be opening alone. maybe he's the one to go to a mall manager or security officer worried about scoops being closed because he *knows* the people that are supposed to be there right now and they don't just abandon work at the same time with no explanations.

or maybe eddie visits in the afternoons and learns they're missing from their coworkers or maybe hes there because he saw it on the news and went on his our hunt. either way it'd probably end with Eddie looking around the mall for them because he knows steve isn't going to just abandon his beemer in a busy public parking lot. maybe he finds them high out of their minds while checking the movie theatre (this one i do see a lot and am obsessed with its so good) or maybe he doesn't find them at all (its a big mall and they are actively hiding from Russians who know they escaped. sure stobin are not being very secretive while high but dustin and erica are at least keeping them in less-discoverable locations). maybe he goes home knowing hes looked everywhere in that damn mall and assumes they're probably kidnapped and taken somewhere else (if he did find them tho that opens a whole can of worms for if, how, and how much eddie gets involved and while my brains gone down sone of those rabbit holes i don't think i will today)

and then they see the news about the mall fire. and eddie knows damn well that he looked everywhere in that mall but didn't see a trace of his friends but there they are on the news and apparently in the fire. maybe eddie assumes he didn't look hard enough. but maybe he sees how steves the only one with more than a few bruises on his legs, how despite them claiming he was trapped in rumble that also allegedly killed billy hargrove he looks like hes carrying himself on adrenaline alone and hovering around robin and the kids like something more than falling support beams could get to them. maybe its the fact that he look as shit as he did but wasn't laying down on a hospital stretcher like he would be if he just got those wounds.

_._._._

hi if you saw any typos no you didn't UNLESS theyre funny or actually concerning then you should tell me and i can react appropriately

also i swear i feel like doctor strange looking through every possible reality when i go on tangents like this. idk whenever i come up with little fics in my head or come up with different ways my favorite unfinished fics could end im always exploring as many different versions of the same scenario as i can and coming up with as many what-ifs as i can.

also i pressed the poll button by accident while making this and idk how to make it go away to we're trying just ignoring it and not writing anything in it to see if it goes away

actually fuck that it probably wont work so im adding a poll question as a treat for the people who read this far

[buckets-and-trees]

Game: match the character with the trope & give a little explanation why you paired them/how you would go about writing that type of fic 🩷

Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, Ransom Drysdale, Ari Levinson & Nick Fowler

Forced proximity, forbidden love, fake dating, hidden identity & arranged marriage

Okay, this was fun, Em! And at least this time I didn't get TOO carried away...

ARI LEVINSON - FORCED PROXIMITY - I don't know... maybe this 2500-imagine-ish pitch that spilled out of my fingers this weekend? Hahaha

BUCKY BARNES - HIDDEN IDENTITY - I think this could happen over many different period of Bucky's life, but I'm especially interested in Bucky on the run after Winter Soldier and before Civil War. I love reading fics that take place during this time, and I've got a fic that I started and need to go back to (and maybe rewrite so I can complete it) that would be him hiding for short periods of time in cabins/rentals/vacation homes as he makes his way out of the DC Metro area those first months after CA:WS and while he's crashed at one particular place, Reader shows up, and they spend a few days or maybe a week together before moving on to the next place (and the next and the next until he eventually ends up in Romania).

RANSOM DRYSDALE - FAKE DATING - When a petition citing some extenuating circumstances/technicalities/the manner in which his confession was coerced/etc, a judge is willing to review it due to Ransom's good behavior (read: MONEY) while he's been serving time, and he gets him out of jail. You are immediately hired to be his Cinderella-image of a girlfriend so he can become the public's wronged and misunderstood Prince Charming because Linda won't have any more bad press - it's affecting all of the family businesses. Why are you willing to take the deal? You came up in an initial pool of suitable eligible females in the local area and it just so happens that one of the editor's at Harlan's publishing house (still overseen by Walt) has been considering one of your novels for publication, and this presents an opportunity for them to sweeten a proposal for this PR relationship by offering you a six-novel publishing deal as long as you maintain the relationship with Ransom for at least 18 months.

NICK FOWLER - FORBIDDEN LOVE - You're a detective working for Interpol. You know the trouble he's caused. Even though he was able to cover up his deeds initially with the CIA, once the Chinese/MSS took him into custody, it all came out. But he's managed to escape. He's managed to find his way to Romania, which is where you just so happen to be stationed now. You worked a case closely with him six years ago in Portugal, and...though you both kept it professional, his charm was undeniable. He had no idea you were in Romania, but he's not mad about that in the slightest now that he's spotted you. He could have some fun with this. Are you ready to play with fire?

STEVE ROGERS - ARRANGED MARRIAGE - In a Steve Stays scenario, if he's going to refuse to be Cap, he's being lobbied to still use his influence and power to help bring some order to this post-Blip society. He went tried to retreat and fade into the background, but things are escalating, and Pepper - who had also tried to stay in the background - is concerned that there are things happening maybe because of their inaction. She's got an idea. She wants to get Steve into political office, and she's going to appeal to his sense of duty (which she can do because it's the guilt she's also feeling). He'll agree because he trusts her judgement. For the best image, he's going to need a wife - this is a harder sell, but - again - he trusts Pepper Potts, he doesn't even need to vet the candidates, because if he's all in on this idea, he'll be all in, and he knows Pepper will pick someone who will fit the bill as his suitable trophy wife. You.

would... well would anyone be interested in any of these if I thought about actually writing them?

[bouncydragon]

Unusual Judgement

So, I finished this somewhat silly "little" fic a while ago but was nervous about posting it anywhere (still am tbh). The title is not set, actually, it's just the most decent one I could think of instead of the placeholder I had previously. Well, anyway, hope you enjoy it.

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Pairing: Tommy x Alfie

Word count: 2195

Summary: In which Alfie comes to Tommy's mansion but has to face judgement by someone very important to Tommy first before getting to the fun activities. Needless to say he thinks it's ridiculous but still he will humour Tommy.

Warnings: None, I think... It's just silly and soft.

AO3

“This is utterly ridiculous,” Alfie complained as Tommy practically dragged him towards the stables of his country estate.

Alfie had only arrived at Arrow House perhaps ten minutes ago, with a clear plan in mind of what to do with his time here, but apparently Tommy had an entirely different idea of how they should spend their already limited time together. At least for the time being, which was still an unfortunate development. Alright, perhaps Alfie was exaggerating a little bit but still, he could think of lots of things they could be doing instead.

They didn’t get to see each other as much as they wanted, and especially not in Tommy’s own home. It was—usually anyway—clandestine meetings in not too fancy hotels; hotels where they knew nobody would rat on them, or even bat an eye at two men (that very well may be walking a tad too close to each other) going up to the same room to spend the night. There was the rare occasion of them meeting at Alfie’s own house in Camden Town but he had fairly nosy neighbours, and another man staying with him overnight would probably cause rumours to spread like a fucking wildfire. Which in and of itself Alfie didn’t give much of a fuck about but if those rumours would reach the ears of his or Tommy’s enemies, they would be in a whole lot of trouble, as a thing like this was perfect leverage against either of them. And it would be far easier for those fuckers to have them arrested by the coppers for fucking sodomy than to try and take Alfie and Tommy out themselves. They would need proof of course, and Tommy and him were fairly good liars (or bullshitters, whatever), but it would still be a bad situation for them and it was doubtful they’d be able to ever shake the rumours after it, so they didn’t want to take any risks; at least not more than already anyway.

Either way, the invitation to stay at Tommy’s mansion over the weekend had come as quite the surprise for Alfie but also he liked the slight change in their routine and the chance to spend more than a mere few hours or a night with Tommy. He still was a bit worried about it though, about the possibility of Tommy’s family catching them mostly. But his housekeeper Frances was nice and also apparently knew what was going on here actually, judging by the knowing smile she had given Alfie upon his arrival. She hadn’t commented on anything and Tommy seemed to trust her a lot, so Alfie was quite sure she would keep their little secret safe.

And seriously, Alfie was looking forward to this weekend, but the start of it was certainly quite odd. He should be used to Tommy’s sometimes unpredictable behaviour by now, though usually that meant rage and anger and not… this. He’d even go so far to call it eccentric, at least in this very circumstance.

“They’re a good judge of character,” Tommy said, like it made any sense to anyone but himself. He didn’t look back at Alfie as he said that but, thanks to the privacy of his own property, still held Alfie’s hand. Which Alfie did not mind at all, to be honest, he just wished Tommy wouldn’t drag so much.

Alfie rolled his eyes, trying to keep up with Tommy’s rather crisp pace. He was undoubtedly excited, which was an interesting thing to witness. “You already know my fucking character.”

Tommy shrugged and just kept on dragging Alfie towards the horses that were grazing out on the pasture.

“Tommy, treacle,” Alfie tried, letting out an exasperated sigh. “Are you actually telling me that you put more weight on a bloody horse’s opinion of someone than on your own?”

“They’re good judges of character,” Tommy repeated matter-of-factly, not making any more sense this time around.

“Alright,” Alfie sighed. “I’ll humour you. So, hypothetically, if the horse doesn’t approve of me, what will happen? Will you just break this off? Send me on my merry fucking way and return to business as usual?”

“No, of course not,” Tommy answered, finally stopping his infuriating dragging. He looked at Alfie with those bright blue eyes that he knew very well drove Alfie crazy. “You’ll just have to… spend more time with them, charm them.” He grinned. “You know, how you’d do with the parents of someone you love.”

Alfie pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head. “You are fucking ridiculous, mate.”

“And yet you love me, Alfie.”

“Do I?” Alfie couldn’t believe this man. Mad, just mad. Which, coming from him, said a fucking lot. “I might have to rethink that.”

Tommy let go of his hand, crossing his arms over his chest. He quirked an eyebrow, tilting his head ever so slightly to the side, and just looked at Alfie. Just looked at him with those bright blue eyes. A piercing look, quite intense. It was the kind of look Tommy used when negotiating with someone, be it a potential business partner or an enemy. Alfie liked that look, and the way others caved under it, which unfortunately included him in this instance.

He sighed. “Alright, I do. But you are still fucking ridiculous, Tommy.”

Tommy just smirked triumphant. Alfie shook his head; and people called him a madman.

“Let’s just get this over with,” Alfie decided. “I have better things to do, like getting those clothes off you and fuck you senseless.”

Tommy chuckled and shook his head. “Patience is a virtue, darling,” he said softly as he took Alfie’s hand again, giving it a gentle squeeze just because he could.

Alfie rolled his eyes and let Tommy lead him onto the pasture. He liked the feel of Tommy’s hand in his, to be completely honest. Mostly because they didn’t get to do that very often.

Ever since this thing between them started (they had only very recently started to call it an actual relationship), Alfie had made the surprising discovery that Tommy liked touching, a lot. He always needed to touch Alfie in some way. It wasn’t possible at all in public, and also not when they were alone but there was the possibility of someone walking in on them, like when they were in either of their offices. Alfie got the impression that it bothered Tommy to not be able to touch him, even in the simplest, smallest way imaginable. They usually opted for being just a little too close to each other but it obviously wasn’t the same. So when they finally got some time alone, Tommy could absolutely not keep his hands off Alfie.

Actually, Alfie would even go so far to say that Tommy could get quite needy, in private anyways. Always needing to touch and be close, somehow having forgotten the concept of personal space; not that Alfie minded, alright. He actually quite liked it because it was such a drastically different side of the usually so cold and ruthless Tommy Shelby—a side that perhaps not even his own family got to see often, if at all. He could be so sweet and soft and was actually very much able to relax. He just hardly got the chance to, Alfie supposed, which made it all the more surprising that he found it so easy to relax when he was alone with Alfie.

He also liked to cuddle, liked it a lot, but would never fucking admit it, not even at gunpoint. You could probably torture him and he’d sooner admit to being queer than to being a cuddler.

“I still think you’re being ridiculous, just so we’re clear,” Alfie pointed out, watching the horses warily.

He wasn’t scared of horses, mind you. He just wasn’t particularly a fan of them, perhaps it was their size or those fucking hooves that could potentially crack a man’s skull. He also just simply could not fathom what Tommy saw in them. He did like to see that certain glow in Tommy’s eyes when he was talking about them though. That look of pure childlike delight. Or the look of unrestrained excitement Tommy had right now due to the prospect of introducing Alfie to his horses. It was sweet, he supposed, and it softened Tommy’s ragged edges, almost making him look a bit younger, less weary of life and its endless troubles.

Tommy just nodded in response to Alfie’s comment and stopped walking. He whistled and while all of the horses lifted their heads (their heads were too big as well, Alfie thought, everything about horses was kind of weird), only one of them walked towards where Tommy and Alfie were standing near the fence. It was, in all fairness and Alfie’s uneducated opinion, a quite beautiful looking horse with a sleek black coat and mane that blew softly in the fresh spring breeze.

It still looked quite a bit intimidating though.

The horse approached Tommy first, nudging him softly and earning a pat on the neck and a soft smile. Tommy petted its head tenderly and whispered something to it, while throwing a sideways glance at Alfie, who really tried not to grow uncomfortable or even anxious in this very unusual situation.

Being judged by a horse was certainly something else and only Thomas fucking Shelby would come up with it. Honestly, why he loved this cunt was beyond Alfie sometimes.

The horse slowly strode towards Alfie, fixing him with its dark eyes. Alfie stayed still, just waiting for whatever was about to happen. The horse came to a halt right in front of him.

“Hello… horse,” Alfie said, unsure of how to act exactly.

The horse circled around Alfie, seemingly taking all of him in with a certain degree of scrutiny. Alfie had no idea horses could even look so scrutinising. He’d bet, if it could, it would raise an eyebrow at him. It made him feel somewhat uneasy. When it finally stopped its assessment, it stood in front of Alfie and sniffed him curiously, eventually huffing right into Alfie’s face and nickering. It nudged him and nipped at his coat’s pockets. Alfie looked towards Tommy with an eyebrow raised in question and cluelessness. Since this had been his idea, Tommy should give him some pointers on how to proceed at least. But the other man simply grinned and looked very pleased.

“He likes you,” he explained. “He is demanding treats.”

“Well, I don’t have any, obviously.”

Tommy took Alfie’s hand and put some treats in it. “Go on. Flat palm.”

Alfie sighed and held his hand out to the horse just like Tommy said. The horse sniffed at it, accepting the peace offering, as Alfie would describe it, and happily munched away.

Tommy looked indeed very pleased and happy next to Alfie, smiling softly at him—oh, there was the reason why he loved him, now he remembered. It was a very good look on him though, so the ridiculousness with the horse had at least been worth it in the end.

“Are we done with this then?” Alfie asked, dropping his hand once the horse had eaten all the treats.

Tommy nodded smiling, wrapping his arms around Alfie's neck. “Still think I’m ridiculous?”

“Yes,” Alfie answered but smiled. “But I also love you, you fucking bastard.”

Tommy chuckled, shaking his head. Alfie grinned at him, then closed the small distance between them, capturing Tommy's soft lips in a tender but almost hungry kiss, which caused a low, pleased hum to escape Tommy.

This was exceptionally nice and special, Alfie thought as Tommy leaned further into the kiss, deepening it. He let his hands wander down Tommy's back, feeling the tiny shudder of anticipation that went through the other man's body at that simple gesture. He settled a hand on the small of Tommy's back, pulling him closer against him. He probably wasn't much different than Tommy, if he genuinely thought about it. Couldn't keep his hands off him, right, always needed to touch and feel the man's body against his.

In his defence, it was a very, very nice feeling.

The thing that made Alfie smile even more though, was that there was no tension in Tommy's body anywhere right now. He was just happy and relaxed, leaning into Alfie's embrace and savouring their kiss, almost getting lost in it even.

It was such a rare thing that they could be so open with their affection for each other, so they cherished any moment when they got to do it. Doing it so out in the open would be impossible under any other circumstance but this being Tommy's private property, they were thankfully sheltered and could for once just be themselves without fear of consequences and judgement.

Eventually it was Tommy who broke the kiss first, giving Alfie a soft, pleased smile. Without a word, he intertwined their fingers and took Alfie back to the house and up to his bedroom. Now this was more what Alfie had in mind when he had come here and so he was looking forward to it immensely.

[streets-in-paradise]

Our Fight - Hector x (Fem)Reader

Troy (2004) Oneshot

Requested by Anon

" Heyyy, I read some of your Troy 2004 fics and I'm sooo in love with how you write them. Your writing is so good. I thought maybe you could do a Hector one because my man is underrated, I don't have a specific idea in mind but particularly I'm someone who likes a little angst, those where maybe Hector gets back from battle hurt or his wife is hurt somehow, perhaps by Paris in someway, maybe a protective Hector in the scene... it can be with Andromache or a Fem reader too, I just thought of this idea. I said it but again I love your writing so much, spent nights finishing it all hahaha, have a super good day :D "

Awww, thank you so much again 💕💕

I'm so sorry this took me so long to post, some stuff irl is affecting my mood and it's becoming harder to keep up with a writing schedule. Hope you will still see it and it will be of your liking. Protective Hector is something i really need rn, so I went for that route, with Paris hurting his brother's wife emotionally during an argument. I made it a x reader because i feel it was more fitting for the idea i had in mind given it's influenced on how i'm feeling.

Warnings: Angst with comfort, feelings of hopelessness.

Summary: An altercate with Paris brings to the surface all your fears and insecurities for the future and after standing up for you, Hector does his best to calm you in a private sharing of your burdens.

Tags: @g-m-kaye

As a daughter of the same land, the actions of your brother in law filled you with indignation. As a member of the family, you were still trying to understand. The constant comparisons Paris attempted to make between your marriage and his were offensive, even if the only point of genuine closeness was the fact that both were based in love. 

For that foreign wife he sold the future of your country, and you felt that you would never be able to forgive him, at least as a trojan sheltered by the same nation. His reckless offer to win back the people’s trust by fixing the problem he had caused meant very little to you. Despite his good intentions, the goodness of his heart would never be enough to stop Agamemnon. Your mercy was reserved for Helen, who you couldn’t blame for wanting to escape at the first chance presented to her given the horrors she must have endured as the sister in law of the cruel mycenaean king. She had proven to her protectors she understood the risks, but the sudden finding of hope in her sad life encouraged her to take a rushed choice. 

After living a romantic fantasy in Sparta, reality was smacking Paris in the face as you wished you could. 

“ Do you even dimension the consequences of your actions, or have you delegated all perceptions of guilt on Helen?” You were calling him out, as soon as you heard of the pointless duel proposition. “ Giving a spectacle that looks like accountability will not solve anything, not even to show the trojan soldiers you are willing to risk your life the same way they do for you. There is an empire on the rise behind the angered husband, and we are the most persistent obstacle in its way. All we have left is deciding if we, as a nation, want to die fighting or live as slaves.” 

“ I’m doing the best I can! “ The naive young man defended himself. "But if what you seek is to make me regret my choice, I must warn that is not going to happen. “ 

You fulminated him with your glance, then looked at Hector as if you seeked he would calm down the fire inside of you before things could get worse. 

“ So what? Do you expect me to stand up and clap you? My husband could be slaughtered because of your intempestive reaction to being denied something for the very first time in your life!”

Paris took that offense very seriously and stopped measuring his phrasing. 

“ Maybe Hector should have married a princess of Hatti, so a friendly empire would be on our side. If you think love is so expendable, give up on yours.” 

For a harmless little man, Paris was capable of wrecking you with his words during harsh arguments. If the duel would take place in a council, instead of a battlefield, he would effortlessly destroy Menelaus. 

Hector knew his brother had gone too far, and he stopped him for you before the provocations would destroy your nerves. 

“ I have given up enough for you, Paris, and I’m still waiting to be compensated for it. “ He warned him. “ Don’t mistake my will of service with absolute disinterest for my own life. I earned my right to sporadic selfishness as a prince and warrior, while you have been selfish from birth. Ask yourself if you would have cared for Helen's unlucky marriage if she wouldn't have mesmerized you in the first place. Would you have offered shelter to a suffering greek girl, if she wouldn’t be the famously proclaimed beauty of the century? "

The youngest prince remained silent, acknowledging his defeat, but his brother didn’t care about that anymore. He could tell you were affected by the poisonous strike, regardless of his avenging protectiveness. 

In the sacred shelter of your thalamus you released your emotions, a moment of private comfort after facing so much pain in the short span of the greek’s arrival. 

“ I’m proud of your speech, you spoke fairly. Sometimes you are the only one who dares to challenge Paris when he deserves it, despite how father protects him.” He attempted to cheer you, holding you in his arms with loveful softness. “ He needs to hear the truth, I believe both need it. “

“ Sadly, that’s our fight. How can we save a nation unaware of its own demise?” You wondered out loud, sharing a frustration that was mutual. “ The illusion of choice is what has been presented to us. If we fight this war, chances are we will lose and get erased from the face of earth by the force of an empire that hates us too strongly to allow a mark of our passing to remain in history. If we give up, we will survive in an obscure existence as servants of this power. Our children will die in wars being fought far away from us, for reasons that aren’t even of our concern… Perhaps fighting men that look closer to them than the master, other asians attempting to resist the expansion. Tales won’t mourn their passing, eclipsed by the songs of the greek heroes guiding them to doom. They will be lost in the herds of submitted armies that Agamemnon keeps as reserve, hopeless men dying for his greed. Maybe even you would find your end in one of those never ending cycles and your tomb will be placed far away from Troy, where I will not be able to cry for you.” 

The dark presumptions you were announcing like an omen, although frightening due to your flawless logic, inspired on him the strength that he felt failing when Achilles killed Tecton. If then he doubted the course to take, he got reminded there were only two grim possibilities to pick and he knew which one he despised over anything. 

“ Could this be the last war we will be fighting for ourselves? The end of trojan history? It will be,for sure, if we don’t try it.” 

He seemed more determined than before, as if your opinion would have help him accommodate the contradicting thoughts in his mind.

“ Do you now wish you would have married the Hatti princess?” 

Hector answered wordlessly, by giving you a passionate kiss that neither of you stopped tasting until the need for air became unbearable. 

“ I will dedicate all my efforts into making sure you will get to rule Troy as my Queen.” He concluded, whispering near your lips. “ … To my last breath, you will see Paris is not the only stubborn man of the family.” 

You caressed his hair as you delivered your reply.

“ I don’t need a throne, all I ever wanted is to be your wife.” You reassured him, taking care that he won’t be putting too much pressure on himself. “ … but how I would love to kick that emperor away from our land and see all the slaves rise …  ‘If Troy could resist him, so can we’, they will say, and I bet you will hear Achilles has started the rebellion with the discontented soldiers. “

He stared at you in wonder of your clever guesses, wishing he could find the way of making you introduce those to his father and see if something would stick with him. 

“ That is, without doubt, an excellent theory. It’s precisely why Agamemnon can’t give up, unless we make him.” 

You showed him a prideful smile that was followed by more kisses. 

“ Our fight doesn’t look so hopeless after all. “ You commented later, regarding a brief change in your own mood. “ There is a lot at risk, but we are not the lost case Agamemnon wants us to feel. He is more doomed if he loses, and he commands a bunch of demoralized men with nothing of their own to fight for.” 

“ This is why I don't make my final choices before our late night talks.” Hector replied. squeezing the embrace a little tighter. “ My mind is more clear when I’m with you, even at the darkest hours of my life.” 

[wandering-imp-reads]

(Blush Blush) Cole x reader

Trying to get back in the swing of writing fic after seven years. Cole/reader seemed fitting.

Warnings: Cole being yandere, homeboy kills someone (not super descriptive but ask to tag). they/them used. There is misgendering (Ex continuously calls MC she, and a bitch). AFAB reader, but I tried to be GN for it.

MC is reader, second POV when MC is around. Third when Cole's. mostly from Cole's perspective.

“Who was that?” you’ve long since gotten used to the way Cole just appears sometimes. Same with the almost feral, borderline territorial, tone in his voice.

“Just…my ex,” you mutter. Mood dampened from having had contact with the man. Your ex, Dvid, had been…not exactly the best in the almost two years you were with him. Cole hums. His cold gray eyes never leave the figure of the taller, older man. Plans are already starting to form in his mind. Having only heard the bare minimum of your time with David, he knows there’s more to it. Still…he shifts his gaze over to you. He is able to tell how uneasy the encounter has made you. 

“The one you told me about?” there’s a subtle softness reserved for you, only for you, in his voice.

You sigh, tension leaving your body at the touch of Cole’s hand on your back. You lean into his touch. “Yeah. That’s the one. From a year ago, before we met.”

His eyes soften. He hums once more, shifting to stand directly behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist. His chin rests against your shoulder. “Love, you don’t have to worry about him anymore.” A soft kiss is pressed to  the side of your neck. “I promise you I’ll always protect you.” The gentle rumblings of a purr emit from his throat, reverberating through you as well.

“Thank you, Cole.” 

He’s elated to see your smile again. 

“Come on, let’s head home.”

~

In a basement -lit only by a lightbulb hanging from the ceiling- in the center of the room, sits the same man from earlier in the day. Restrained to the chair that’s bolted to the floor. The wood is stained with…a suspiciously dark color in patchy splotches. Metal restraints wrap tightly around his forearms and shins, keeping him from any chance of escape.

Alive, at least.

“Oh good,” a voice from the shadows of the damp room starts, “you’re finally awake.” Cole creeps out into the illuminated area.  Knife in his hand. He twirls the blade in his fingers. 

“Who the hell are you?”

“Me? Oh, I’m no one.” Cole points the tip of the knife at his captured victim. “But you? You’re a very important person.” 

He steps closer.

“You’ve caused my precious darling so much trouble. Just as they start to finally move on and become happy again,” Cole the flat of the knife’s blade to tip David’s chin up, “You show up. 

David scoffs. “You mean that stupid bit-”

“Watch it.” His voice hardens, dropping dangerously low. “MC is the sweetest, the light of my life. If you keep talking badly about them, well… I’ll just have to make sure you won’t talk again.” 

“Oh, come on! She’s just using you for sex! Trust me. She pulled the same shit with me, she’ll do the same fucking thing to you!” David struggles against his restraints a bit. “Once that little bitch gets what she wants out of you she’ll drop your ass!”

With a growl, the knife gets plunged into the palm of the man’s hand, pinning the appendage to the wood of the chair’s arm. “They,” Cole emphasizes by twisting the knife ever so slightly, “are my darling.” Oh how he relishes in the pained scream of the man. If only you could be here to witness this. To witness just how far Cole will go just to prove his love to you. To prove how perfect he is for you. “Keep it up. See where it gets you.”

Cole backs away to a table. He shuffles through the different knives and other instruments he has on it. He hums whilst looking over his toys, enjoying the other man’s screams.

“What the fuck is wrong with you!?”

“Me? Nothing, unless loving my darling is wrong. Which it's not.”

“You’re a fucking freak.”

Cole huffs, eyeing the blade in his hands carefully. “Say, didn’t you stand MC up on that New Year’s Eve date you planned for them? The one that was all your idea, and that you constantly bugged them about until they agreed. Even after they made all the preparations and paid for everything on their own dime?”

David stutters through the pain, incoherent even if Cole was paying attention.

“They did all that for you, following your every command because they loved you.”

“No, something came up, and…and-”

“Lying to me isn’t going to help. Do you have any idea how heartbroken they were over you? How much they cried over you?”

“She cries all the damn time!” Any other words die on his tongue as a knife is thrown. The blade lodges into the wood just beside his neck.

“Shut up!” Cole stalks over to the man, predatory instincts kicking in. There’s an unhinged gleam in his eye. “You groomed them to be your prey! You manipulated their heart until they had no one else to turn to but you, and then you would toy with their emotions until you needed them for your own needs!”

He raises a hand, stabbing another knife into David’s other hand. The battered man screams out in agony again.

“You used them for sex! For your own disgusting game!”

“She’s just as guilty for stringing me along!”

“You’re nothing but a predator!” Finally cole grabs the man by his hair, tilting his head back --brandishing a fourth knife-- and then-

Silence.

You awake the next morning with the warm, comforting feeling of a familiar body entangled with yours. A soft purr drifting in the morning’s tranquility. Cole’s lips meet with the back of your shoulder, followed by the gentlest of nips to the flesh.

“Good morning, my love.” His voice is soft, laced with exhaustion.

You roll over to face him, a sleepy smile on your lips. “Good morning to you too, precious kitty.”

If his pupils could turn into literal hearts you’re certain they would’ve in this moment. He whines while bringing your palm to his face.

“Can we just stay in bed, together, forever?”

“I would love nothing more. You got home late last night,” you gently rub your thumb along his cheekbone. “Is everything okay?”

He nods. Cole nuzzles into your palm, placing a feather light kiss to it. “Everything is just fine now. I hope you’re feeling better after yesterday’s…encounter.”

“I am. Having you by my side, loving me as I am really helps. If we run into him again, I know you’ll be there for me.”

He hums, pulling you closer to himself to hide the same unhinged glint in his eye from the night before. “I will. Though, I doubt we’ll be seeing him anytime soon.”

[nervousladytraveler]

2023 AO3 Fic Review/Wrap-Up

Thank you to the lovely @dreamstone28737 for the tag! 😘 I took a long time to respond--sorry!

I didn't really write too many different works this year so I refer to the same titles a few times in my responses below. That said, I did write (or at least post) 307,626 words–not too shabby!

List of Fics Completed This Year

One-Shots: I don’t tend to write too many little fics. But this year I did “The Shift” and “A Brilliant Choice”. Most of my one shots tend to come from prompts (and @veryflowerobservation always sends me good ones). I have another wee fic (“A Question of Trust”) that is a Grace Poldark/Tom Jones crossover story that is completed, but not yet posted. I need to finish reading the novel Tom Jones before I do just to make sure I got it right.

Multi-Chap: Like Someone Who Would Know Her Own Mind and A Rose in December

Series: A Rose in December is now part of a Like Someone Sequels series?

Your Personal Fave

A Rose in December because it just was so enjoyable to write.

Your Fave Scene

My favorite scene ? Hard to choose but maybe a few from A Rose in December. I really enjoyed writing the conversation between Ross and Demelza when they first meet over coffee (Ch 4 “Tiramisu” and Ch 6 “Two of Cups”). My second favorite is the end when they are on the phone with Prudie (especially the bawdy jokes she and her cousin make) in Ch 32 “Candle Dance.” But in truth, I only finished/edited/posted those scenes this year--and really first wrote them a while ago. Does that still count?

A Fic or Scene that Challenged You

Any scene that has characters under emotional duress is always hard for me. I really internalize their feelings and have a hard time shaking them off. There are a few chapters in A Rose in December that show a relationship unravelling. Those were tough and tricky to get right. But also scenes where a lot of plot is covered–those are difficult too! There are a few chapters in Duty that are like that.

A Line of Writing You’re Proud Of

I try not to get too attached to any one line of writing. I am partial to dialogue–the back and forth is fun–but don't have any particular favorite.

A Comment That Touched You

Whenever a reader tells me that something I wrote gave them comfort during a rough spell or that they reread for the same reason, those comments always really move me. Of course I wish no one ever had the need for it, but I'm glad I could somehow help.

Something That Inspired Your Writing

One afternoon last spring while travelling, I slipped into a church in Germany. It was just me and the organist and it was so lovely. That inspired a scene in Ch 41 (“For the Sake of My Tears”) of Duty when Demelza hears the organist practicing in the Truro Cathedral.

Your proudest accomplishment (that one scene; finally finishing that one fic; posting your first fic; etc)

I think the fact that I finished Like Someone (in January of 2023) after so many years of working on it was a massive accomplishment. I do recall feeling a sense of satisfaction that buoyed me for weeks. But then finally finishing A Rose in December (in December 2023) was also profoundly gratifying, so they make nice bookends to the year!

Do You Have Any Writing Goals for Next Year?

I want to try to recreate the joy I found when I stopped working on anything else and immersed myself in finishing A Rose in December. I allowed myself to only focus on that story and was able to design an intentional structure for it--and not get distracted by posting along the way. 

Tagging any and all of my writing my pals — but no pressure! ❤️

P. S. This also came with a stats sheet.  I chose not to do one because it seemed like it would take me further from my goal to focus and enjoy the process of writing more but feel free to make it part of the challenge or not! The template is from dreputationera!

[aurora567]

Little Mouse Ch. 14

Warnings this fic will contain mature themes. Such as but not limited to teasing, kidnapping, Stockholm syndrome, very unhealthy relationships, some elements of non-con/rape, threesomes, drug use, breath play, voyeurism, branding, sex.

Word count: 5780

Last Chapter Next Chapter

The single word reply had been surprising, as were the strings that had come with it. Though Rin should have expected that. After all, she should have known Shigaraki would never have let her leave on her own. But to find herself walking the empty streets with the pale haired man beside her was not expected. He was in a deep blue hoodie with the hood pulled up and into his face keeping him rather well hidden. She didn’t feel as much need to hide herself. After all it seemed clear when All Might had crashed the bar she was unknown. They didn’t seem to have any idea who she was which seemed stupid on their part. It still pissed her off and made her blood boil that no one noticed she was gone. She was once a pro hero’s sidekick, saw tragedy, and then turned to the medical field. Sure she had never made any big name for herself or worked with anyone who was a big name but still to think her work didn’t even realize she was missing. It was enough to do more than irritate her. In one sense it was devastating, in another it made her angry. She was just tossed aside as if no one cared.

Was this what the league had experienced? Was this their shared ground? And the reason Shigaraki had been so interested in her? Thinking she was a similar soul? She wasn’t sure but she couldn’t deny her vision of heroes was quickly changing. And she wasn’t sure how she felt about that.

“I am curious. Why did you decide to come with me? You could have sent anyone to babysit me,” she asked softly, ensuring if anyone was close they hopefully wouldn’t be able to make out her soft voice. But the man walking beside her was quick to glance over at her as she spoke up. She expected him to tell her to shut up or just refuse to answer so when he did she was a bit surprised.

“I simply wanted out of that damn hideout,” well it was a simple enough reason. And who was she to question it. After all, he actually answered her instead of getting upset with her. She softly nodded her head at the answer and let it go as she watched his left hand raise up and softly scratch at his neck a little.

With that she let the conversation drop once more allowing the two of them to walk the streets silently and move around without drawing any real attention to themselves. Which was the main idea after all it wouldn’t be good if someone recognized at least Shigaraki. If hero’s showed up and started a fight in the middle of the street it would be devastating for all the bystanders in the area. After all Shigaraki’s disintegration quirk was not one to take lightly. He could do a lot of damage to people around him who are innocent civilians before he could be caught. That is if he was even caught. Rin imagined that Kurogiri was a simple speed dial away and a portal would open in a heartbeat whisking the villain away.

Rin also took this chance to take in her surroundings. The streets were not ones she knew. And sadly she had no idea where within Japan they even were. She had no way of currently knowing that she was somewhere within Musutafu. The area was foreign to her. Which forced her to trust that Shigaraki knew where he was going to take her to her destinations. She needed to find a pharmacy, that would be the embarrassing purchase. Nothing like buying birth control with a rather socially awkward man. Then she was hungry. Some actual food would be heaven after the string of convenient store junk they had been living off of for who knows how long. Has it been two weeks or three? Maybe it had only been a single week? Rin was losing sense of her days. She was just happy that Shigaraki had not taken her wallet. He had left her with the cash she had in it. Not a lot but enough she could buy what she needed at least. She may not have anything left but oh well.

With that thought she spotted a small little pharmacy come into view down the road. Silently she turned her attention to the door and made her way towards it with the pale tall shadow behind her softly scratching at his neck as he entered the building right behind her.

“What are we doing here?” He asked under his breath as he stuck rather close to her, much closer than she would have liked.

“I need a few things. Some basic first aid supplies would be helpful. I can’t do my job well if I don’t have the proper items,” she said, trying to make it sound as gamer lingo as she could but it was a bit tricky. With that she grabbed herself some basic painkillers, bandages and disinfectant. Though the painkillers were more so for herself. She could be rather sore some days after Dabi was done with her. Though she still had not had a chance to make her way to the back and ask for her prescription yet. That was going to be the worst part as she couldn’t think of a way to get the man to back off a little. She was just going to have to bite the bullet and do it.

Without looking back at Shigaraki she made her way towards the back of the little store just expecting the man was tailing her as he had been since they walked through a portal saving them some walking and keeping the warehouse's exact location a secret. But for now Rin just tried her hardest to ignore her unwanted shadow as she walked up to the pharmacist and flashed the man a soft smile.

“Hello. I need to refill a birth control prescription. The name is Rin Nakano,” she said as she smiled softly. She had to try not to tense up at the intense feeling of Shigaraki’s eyes boring into the back of her head. She could almost feel the threatening glare she was receiving. She just had to hope the man didn’t try and kill her or the poor pharmacist.

“Okay it will be just a moment,” the pharmacist said to which she mumbled a soft thanks and moved to walk back towards Shigaraki who was standing a bit like a creep with his hand in his hoodie pocket, hood pulled up and those red eyes glaring hard at her.

“Yeah yeah chew my head off once we are outside,” she hissed at him under her breath not wanting to listen to Shigaraki at that exact moment nor did she want the pharmacist to think something was up if Shigaraki got mad and throw a child like tantrum in the building. Though he still gave her a growl.

“Don’t give me orders,” he hissed at her as a hand moved up to scratch at his neck.

“Yeah well if you draw too much attention to us that will cause problems. We are missing important party members if you're going to start a battle,” she said softly trying to reason with the man the best she could though she could tell he was still incredibly uneasy and upset. But at least it settled the man down enough that he no longer looked like he was going to disintegrate the shelf barrier between him and the poor pharmacist who did not know how close to death he truly was.

With her name being called she forced a small smiled walked over, thanks the man before grabbing her prescription and turning to grab the sleeve of Shigaraki’s hoodie trying to drag him along with her as she headed to the till wanting to pay for her things and get the hell out of the building before Shigaraki started anything. Damn it he was supposed to be watching her but it felt the other way around she was having to watch and keep him in line instead. Though why did she? She could just let Shigaraki throw a child-like tantrum, draw in some heroes and get himself arrested and she could cry innocent bystander. Ha that wouldn’t work, if anything happened to Shiggy then Kurogiri would have her ass as well as the rest of the league. And Shigaraki was smart enough to know when to call for help and a single phone call is all that’s needed for a portal to open and for all hell to break loose as help would arrive to aid Shigaraki.

So with her things paid for she quickly darted out of the building nearly dragging the pale haired man with her. To which she didn’t think he was happy about but she didn’t care. She needed to get him away from innocent people that were far too close for her liking. Once on the street she slowed down and let go of his hoodie sleeve which she had grabbed onto since grabbing his hand was not a good idea. She sighed softly to herself once she felt like she could relax a little. Sure there were still people around them on the street but Shigaraki didn’t look like he wanted to kill any of them in particular.

“Why did you need to go to the pharmacy for birth control?” Was the question she was bit expecting from the man. And that had her pause and blink her eyes at him. Did he really just ask her why she needed birth control? Was he that unaware? Yeah no he had to know Dabi and her were sleeping together. After all, Dabi made it clear everyone knew since he couldn’t keep his mouth closed. Well fuck Rin was not about to have the sex talk with Shigaraki in the middle of the street.

“Because I had to have it and I couldn’t send someone else for it. Now I’m hungry and want some actual food let’s grab something,” she said quickly trying to change the conversation as she felt her cheeks heat up at the thought that Shigaraki was about to try and ask her about sex. She was not about to have that discussion with him at that moment or hopefully ever.

“Hmm let’s see what do they have for restaurant's or maybe a street cart,” she hummed softly, not wanting to give the man a chance to continue asking her questions. It seemed every time she thought he was going to open his mouth she would say something.

“It will be my treat so don’t worry,” she said quickly as she led him into an actual restaurant. She aimed for one that wasn’t as brightly lit as some of the others she saw. Hopefully that would help hide Shigaraki a bit. Still she knew the meal would have to be quick. But she couldn’t deny a large part of her was really looking forward to having something that wasn’t from a convenient store or something that had to be microwaved.

She could see Shigaraki stressfully scratching at his neck. Rin tried to give him a warm reassuring smile hoping that would settle his nerves. She could understand the skin crawling feeling he may be feeling though. She had never felt the need to look over her shoulder as much as she did during this one outing. Was this what it was like living as a villain? Always worried that someone was going to just suddenly attack them? Because it wasn’t as much fun as she would have liked. And it in turn had her just inhale her meal that she ordered wanting to actually get back to the warehouse. Oh she never thought she would have thought that she would actually want to head back to the warehouse.

At least Shigaraki had kept himself quiet aside from ordering his meal. And didn’t ask her about her stop at the pharmacy again. Ugh she just wanted to curl up in a ball and hide from the world now. Rin was ready for this day to end now as she ate her food and was just as quick to pull out some of the last bit of cash she had to pay for the meal. Once out of the restaurant it felt like she could actually breath again which was a little bit of a stress relief. This was going to take some getting used to as she now felt paranoid even though she herself had never done anything illegal. Well aside from aiding criminals, okay yeah no she was in trouble now.

Ugh Rin needed to stop thinking about this; it was stressing her out and making it worse as she tried to hold onto her morals but that was a real struggle. She knew she was still a good person but the fact that she was currently standing beside Shigaraki willingly ate at her. Where did her loyalties lay? She wasn’t sure. Geez she was giving herself a headache.

“Do you need to do anything before we head back?” She asked Shigaraki even though she had already started walking back the way they had come from, her little bag of supplies in her left hand.

“No,” was the soft hiss she received which was all she needed to hear as she nodded her head softly at him.

“What’s the plan now?” she asked once the streets became empty allowing her the courage to openly ask Shigaraki what was going to happen now.

“I need to build up my party. I need more warriors,” he said simply as they walked. Okay well that wasn’t exactly what she expected to hear but it was more than she expected.

“Yes the party is lacking some good muscle,” she said softly trying to answer in a way he would like it. After all it was easier to keep the man happy than to watch him throw tantrums over nothing. It was really like trying to talk with a young kid.

But with that the walk back remained silent till Shigaraki came to a stop, pulled out his cell phone and proceeded to call Kurogiri. It didn’t even require him to say anything and a portal opened before them. Stepping through the portal was still such an odd and weird sensation as she stepped into the main room of the warehouse and was greeted with Kurogiri standing before them.

As always she flashed the cloud of smoke a smile unsure exactly if he returned the smiles or not but oh well she still always did it. It only took a second for a shiver to run up her back. A quick glance around the room quickly revealed the reason for the slight uneasy feeling. Dabi was standing off to the side, his eyes slits, his lips pressed heavily together. She was almost sure she was watching smoke come up from the edges of his scarred skin. Was it the good skin or damaged skin that was smoking? She wasn’t sure but she felt the need to become a bomb squad member and go over and diffuse the ticking time bomb that was a pissed off Dabi. She quickly thanked both men again and headed towards the smoking bomb ready for whatever she was about to receive.

“What crawled up your ass?” She asked as she watched him glaring at her as she walked towards him. Of course he was like talking with an animal as she watched his top lip pull back to snarl at her.

“What the fuck were you just doing with Shigaraki?” Of course that’s what got him so upset.

“Calm down. You were not around and I needed to go get some things. Shigaraki only said I could go if I took him with,” she said simply as she raised the bag that had been in her hand up to show it off to the man. That at least seemed to have him calm down enough to stop smoking but it was clear that he was still incredibly upset.

“What’s the matter thought I ran away?” She asked with an arched eyebrow and a little snark. Though it was the odd look that flashed across his face as his snarl fell that had her realize she probably had hit the nail on the head. She had not told him she was going out nor had she ever been allowed to leave so he expected her here and waiting for him. Now she felt a little bad.

“That’s not it,” he growled quickly to recover from her realizing he had probably felt abandoned. She sighed softly.

“Alright. Well I want to put away the stuff I grabbed. Come on and help me,” she said as she started walking, indicating for him to come with her. To which he seemed quick to start walking after her.

The days to follow all seemed to fuse together and Rin completely lost track of days. Had it been days? Had it been weeks? Had it been months? Fuck Rin was going crazy loosing her track of days. All she did was eat, sleep, fuck Dabi and chat with the league. Till that morning when Dabi was given a job to do that had him leave for the day. Well there went one of the best ways to keep herself entertained. She would have much more enjoyed Dabi fucking her senseless all day long. He seemed to make it a point when around that the two spent most of that time together naked. The number of bruises, hickeys and scratches also told everyone who saw her what the two enjoyed doing.

Dressed and bored out of her mind she headed for the main large room curious to know who was all around at the moment. The sun had set and only a few dim fluorescent lights lit the hallway before she entered the dark room. Toga, Shigaraki, Compress, and Magne were the only ones who were currently present. Seemed everyone else had their own job to do for the evening. Though the second she entered the room Toga was far too happy to nearly dance as she made her way to Rin.

“Rin have you heard?” She asked, sounding like a gosping high school kid. Then again she kinda was supposed to be a high school kid based on her age. But with a raise of an eyebrow and a tilt of her head told Toga that Rin did not have a clue what she was going off about so she continued, “Twice found some new recruit. Someone with deep pockets that could really help us out. He’s bringing him around tonight.”

A new recruit? Really? Sure she knew that Shigaraki was looking to make new connections and strength to add to his little makeshift army but still it was odd while hiding that he was going to be meeting up with someone. He must have a lot of faith that this person was safe to bring around.

“Oh is that so? Dabi never told me,” she said simply and watched the blonde girl smile widely.

“Well if you ever left your bedroom more often you would have known,” she said teasingly. Fuck okay it was bad when a high school kid is calling you out for spending to much time fucking a guy.

Toga is just lucky she had piqued Rin’s curiosity or she may have just turned around and headed back to her room. Though that really wasn’t healthy for her mental state. Though neither was hanging out mentally ill serial killers. Even Rin had found herself changing. Her attitude grew more sour and rough around these people. Was it just a survival instinct? Was she changing to simply blend in better with the villains? She didn’t know and in some ways she feared the answer. But yet she let it happen all the same.

“So who is coming around?” She asked, still curious what Toga all had to share. The girl loved her gossip after all. So childish but she couldn’t really couldn’t blame Toga after all she was truly still a child.

“I don’t really know. Just some big shot by the way Shigaraki is interested in him. Twice has been the mediator for them and will be showing up pretty soon with the man,” Toga answers as she seemed to dance around Rin. How was the girl so happy? Oh yes mentally ill she didn’t have a care in the world. For being a high school student, well based on that uniform maybe she was a high school kid though she never attended classes so must be a dropout. But still that was a rather big vocabulary for a high school drop out. It was all the more evident to prove that the blonde was smart. She may have some screws loose in her head but she wasn’t stupid.

Well that didn’t tell Rin much aside from the fact that Toga started to go off about how cool it was going to be, was the new guy gonna be interesting? Could she slice him up if Shigaraki didn’t like him? And just everything that ran through the blonde's head was not at all filtered and just came out the blonde's mouth. But clearly this visitor today must be important. Shigaraki was dressed as if going to war. Hands sat all over his body, not just on his face. It very much reminded her of when she had first met the man.

At some point during the nearly one sided conversation Toga and Rin had found themselves sitting on the ground backs to a crate that Compress was sitting on top of as if watching over the two women in the league. Shigaraki was leaning against the wall between two crates as Magne sat on the other crate. With that all conversation came to a halt as the large main door to the warehouse suddenly opened and two figures walked in. The one was easy to recognize. Twice stood wearing his black and white skin tight suit it really didn’t leave much to the imagination. The other man though was new, and odd. The mask that sat on his face reminded her of a plague doctor. Was it a fashion statement? Or something else? She didn’t know and the second her eyes met his, she froze. The most gold eyes she had ever seen met her emerald green ones. Even though the place was dark she had grown accustomed to the lack of light. But his eyes almost seemed to glow in the low light. It felt like she was staring a leopard in the eyes. The man was dangerous, a predator and for a second she felt like a rabbit trapped under his gaze. Pulling her eyes away she looked over at Toga who was asking about the man in front of them and how he was different from any normal criminal. To which Compress was telling her how he was a yakuza member. The last of a dying breed of underground scum was what he was. But Rin bit her tongue as she simply listened, not wanting to draw any more attention to herself.

Rin wasn’t listening to Compress as she knew exactly who the yakuza was thanks to her hero years. But it was surprising to see such a young looking man standing before them. He had to be in his twenties at least but she was having a hard time telling if he was in his mid twenties or not. He looked her age but with only seeing half his face she couldn’t tell. He may be older than herself and she was twenty-three. His skin was pale, but appeared blemish free, he had delicate eyebrows and long lashes. Three piercings sat in his left ear. What she could see looked completely beautiful. It was nearly breathtaking, but still that air of danger around him remained and kept Rin on high alert as she watched him closely.

Rin wasn’t paying the most attention to the discussion going on around her. The man’s voice was slightly distorted with the mask that sat on his face. She didn’t care that they were talking about All For One which was apparently the man Shigaraki called master. Nor did she care about All Might though she was surprised to hear he retired. Now she was curious what happened after the group had been portaled away. What Shigaraki and this young yakuza head talked about didn’t interest her. No, she kept her eyes locked on him waiting to see when the man would attack. After all it felt like she was watching a snake waiting to see when it would strike out and who would it try to strike? Rin could hear Shigaraki move, stepping out from the crates and seemed to stand a little in front of her and to the left. Tension in the air was growing as both men seemed reluctant to yield to one another.

Like a rubber band that had been stretched too far, the tension in the room finally snapped when Shigaraki told the young man to leave. That was all Magne needed to jump into battle. But Rin’s gut sank. She jumped to her feet ready to join the battle, or at least protect herself. Using her quirk Magne was quick to draw the young man in towards her. Though it was the sight of the man removing the glove that covered his hand that had Rin yelling out for Magne to stop. But it was too late. All it took was a touch of a finger on Magnes arm and Rin was forced to watch her seem to just explode from the inside out.

In anger at the loss of their comrade, Compress was the next to jump into the fray. This time it was Shigaraki who called out for the man to stop but it was too late. And although Compress reached him first, for some reason when Compress touched the man nothing happened. This wasn’t good if no one did anything. Compress was going to die next. Compress jumped back but he wasn’t fast enough his left arm was gone. Clamping her hands down onto the ground without thinking she forced a wall between Compress and the man. Which gave Shigaraki an opening as he rushed forwards. Rin didn’t pay attention as she ran towards Compress quickly inspecting the wound at his shoulder where his arm had been removed. It wasn’t the same as Shigaraki’s quirk. This wasn’t disintegration, no it looked like the body had been blown up from the inside out. The cells had been destroyed. She couldn’t fix the arm but she stopped the bleeding. And tried to ease the man’s pain the best she could.

For a moment an all out battle nearly started. Shigaraki had killed a yakuza member before a stalemate had seemed to be met. But when she looked up to check on Shigaraki she found those golden eyes piercing her. It seemed the woman had grabbed the attention of someone she did not want the attention of. Fuck this wasn’t good as she found herself frozen before watching when the man finally turned and left with his cronies.

Once the yakuza group left the building everyone had gathered around Rin and Compress as she had stopped the bleeding but couldn’t actually repair the arm. The cells were destroyed. That man’s quirk was similar to her own but much stronger. He had been able to completely destroy the cells that were Compress’s arm. And Rin didn’t have the ability to repair the atoms and cells. No matter what she tried Rin would never be able to fix that as much as she wished she could.

With Rin watching over Compress Shigaraki was calling Kurogiri back from wherever he had gone off to. With Twice’s help Rin was able to get Compress to a room and had him resting on a bed as she cleaned and dressed his arm before Kurogiri arrived back. There was talk of someone who could help Compress replace the arm he lost. Though she was more fussy over the fact that once the man woke up from his slumber some good pain meds were going to be needed. Though Rin wasn’t sure she could entrust that a group of mentally ill people who could very well have drug addictions could be trusted with morphine or something of similar potency. But still she put the request in quietly to Kurogiri, entrusting he was the only one that would get it for her and not steal any or come back for it,

Sitting on the floor of his room and with Compress sleeping soundly for the time being with a fresh bandage on his shoulder, Rin found her mind wondering. The man who had done this. His quirk was strong, but why had Compresses quirk not worked when he touched him? That gave a sinking feeling that she did not enjoy. It had to be a drug, couldn’t have been someone’s quirk as no one else was in a close enough range to activate such a quirk. Or at least she assumed that quirks that erased others were rare as she only knew of one man who had that ability. She had never worked with the underground hero but she had heard of the stories of his quirk.

Yet a just as unnerving feeling came over her as she recalled the look in those golden eyes as he stared her down as she had been tending to Compresse’s injured arm. It was her quirk that had prevented him from striking a second blow at Compress and that gave Shigaraki the opening to attack and kill one of his men in turn for the life the yakuza boss had taken. The man had never said a word and yet those eyes had looked like they were trying to pierce into her soul. Even just thinking about it had her shiver at the memory.

The sound of soft groans pulled her quickly from her mind as she turned her attention to the man laying out on the bed. His jacket, vest and shirt were removed. Along with his hat, mask and balaclava had been removed so she could see his face. Half lid hazel eyes glanced at her trying to push through the fog of either pain or the drugs she had already given him. It was a bit hard to tell without the machines she was used to having to help.

“Good morning. How are you feeling?” She asked softly as she waited for his gaze to focus on her after she broke the silence and had moved to stand by his bed.

“I’ve felt better but I am sure I could be feeling worse,” he answered as he glanced around the room, recognizing the room.

“Good. Then I’ll cut back on your pain meds. As long as it doesn’t get infected you will be just fine. Shigaraki is already working at having someone make you a new arm,” she said softly as she eyed up the bandages that covered the edge of his shoulder and what remained of his arm after being destroyed.

“Mmm you are an angel,” he hummed softly, giving her a soft smile. Was that his way of saying thank you? Probably.

“I’m simply making sure a friend doesn’t die,” she said softly as she inspected the injury. Though she was surprised with the reply she said without thinking. Was this man really a friend? She knew he was once a performer, who came from a line of villains. He was rather smart and cunning. Though it seemed he cared a lot for those he saw as important. But were they really friends? Would he have done the same for her? Rin wasn’t sure but she had no desire to figure out the answers or think it over any more.

“Yet you're still my angel. Mmm such a beautiful angel,” he hummed the words, his eyes drifting closed.

“Yeah I’m cutting back your morphine,” she said with a light chuckle as she shook her head at the man as he quickly drifted back into a medically induced calm sleep. Though she had to admit it was funny listening to the few sentences the man had been able to get out. With that Rin returned to sitting on the floor leaning her back against the bed. She wasn’t sure she trusted going too far without machines that would notify her if his health took a turn. For now she let her head roll back against the mattress as her own eyes drifted closed after using her quirk so much to heal up Compress’s arm to keep him from bleeding out. It left her feeling exhausted as her eyes drifted shut and she let herself sleep till the sound of someone approaching her woke her up some time later.

The feeling of a boot giving her side a rougher than needed kick jolted her awake as pain shot through her side for a second. The action was not appreciated as she placed one hand on her side and glared up at the man who was glaring down at her.

“Geez what the fuck do you want Dabi?” She hissed at the man in anger as she looked up into those bright blue eyes.

“What the fuck are you doing sleeping on the floor in his room?” Dabi asked, not at all caring to keep himself quiet as he lazily waved a hand at the man laying on his own bed in his own room.

“I don’t have the equipment to monitor him. So I decided to stay close till I know he’s okay,” she said simply. Though it seemed he didn’t like the answer as he glared at her with a growl.

“I don’t care. I expect you to sleep in our bed,” he was upset. But then again when was he never upset with her? Once again she was reminded of how possessive and controlling he could be.

“You can go a night or two without sex and cuddles,” she said, unable to help the rise of an eye brow as she couldn’t help the bratty tone. To which she earned herself her hair being pulled as she was forced to crank her head up as he kneeled down before his lips crashed against hers.

Next Chapter

[ratboomerang]

a little fic i wrote while playing through act 3 of baldur's gate! i couldn't for the life of me come up with a title i liked, so i'm just leaving it title-less for now.

pairing: gale x tav (they/them)

rating: just angst and a little bit of cuteness! sfw

content: concept of underwater death

spoilers: act 3, blade of frontiers-related quest

summary: while rescuing ulder ravengard, the gondians, and omeluum from the iron throne, everyone is accounted for. everyone... except gale.

______________________________________________________________

All of this for Wyll’s father.

They didn’t regret it—couldn’t regret it. Wyll was their friend after all, and his father didn’t deserve to die. Besides, Baldur’s Gate needed someone to take back the position of Archduke once they’ve dealt with Gortash. But here, miles below the surface, where no one would hear them scream, Tav’s heart was racing. Maybe they should have focused on rescuing Ravengard. At least then they’d have all been out of this prison with more time before it blew. But they just had to be a hero. Had to save as many as possible. Had to find Omeluum. Had to, of course, send Gale to rescue the illithid.

Gale was the most well-equipped by far. His arcane capabilities could easily overcome the obstacle that was the turbulent water filling the prison’s metal channels. Tav trusted him to take care of himself. More than that, Gale trusted himself. Or, at least, Tav thought he did. Knowing Gale’s tendencies, they were starting to worry that maybe he agreed because he didn’t want to let them down. Maybe it was Tav who let him down.

If Gale didn’t make it out of here, it’d be their own damn fault. Wyll would have his father back, and all it would have cost was the man Tav never imagined they’d fall for. They had never been a romantic, not really, they had never considered themself as such. But here they were, holding their breath with an intensity they didn’t anticipate, standing at the bottom of this ladder and refusing to climb up until Gale was able to climb up as well.

“What in the hells are you waiting for? You do know there’s a time limit to this whole maneuver, yes?”

“Astarion, I can’t leave him. We sent him out to—”

“You. You sent him out to grab the Mindflayer. This whole thing was your idea! Don’t pin it on the rest of us! Gods, even Wyll was prepared to accept his father’s fate. If Gale can’t figure out a way to make it back, that, frankly, is his problem! Besides, he was bound to blow up on his own eventually. What difference does it make if the prison beats him to it??”

Tav swallowed the urge to swing at the vampire as he crawled his way up the ladder. There were mere seconds before they would be consumed by Gortash’s explosion, and Tav couldn’t bring themselves to climb just yet. Hero complex, maybe. Recent romantic lapse, more like. The team had managed to free a solid amount of the Gondians, though not all of them made it past the sahuagin. The thought brought on the horrid realization that for all they knew, Gale could be dead himself. He could be lying cold below the murky surface, his blood washed away with the rushing tide, and Tav would never know. Before rationality could catch up to them, they felt themselves rush away from the ladder.

They had barely taken a step before they found themselves folded in half over a tough, burning body. “Come on, soldier. Team needs ya.”

“We can’t leave him, Karlach—I can’t leave him—”

They were met with silence as Karlach hoisted the two of them up the ladder, but Tav could feel her sadness for the loss as well. They were in no position to fight her; her grip around their waist tightened as she felt them try to slip out of her arms before she finally reached the submersible. Redhammer closed the hatch behind her and began to swiftly pull them away from the Iron Throne. Almost immediately after undocking they heard the blast, the sheer power of it shaking the submersible as it dodged falling rubble. Karlach set Tav down, and it was then that they could see the radiant smile stretching across her face. All it took was a quizzical look from them before she nodded over their shoulder. “Turn around.”

So they did. To their surprise, they saw none other than their beloved wizard, mid-conversation with Omeluum. Karlach gave them an encouraging pat on the back but it wasn’t needed. Tav was already dashing over to Gale, embracing him on impact. Gale let out a small huff as Tav barreled into him, but returned the sentiment. Tav gripped his robes tightly, almost as if tangibly reassuring themself that their lover was in fact in front of them. His familiar scent—warm, bookish, fresh—had been replaced with an overwhelming smell of salt and fish, but it was comforting all the same.

“I thought I lost you.”

“Not quite. Still a bit of life in me yet, if I have anything to say about it.”

Tav met his eyes, brushing a hand through Gale’s dripping hair. “You amaze me, you know.”

Gale smiled softly. Of course, Tav knew that behind that smile was a shitload of gratitude. For a man who wanted nothing more than to prove himself worthy of their love, to prove himself a useful asset to the team, compliments like this weren’t taken lightly. “Really—the credit should be handed to our illithid companion. I wouldn’t be standing here if it didn’t magic me to the ship along with it.”

“You’re downplaying your capabilities. Omeluum wouldn’t be here if you didn’t succeed at getting to it in the first place.”

Gale gave a small nod. “Much appreciated. Truly. Now—should you be sitting down? If Karlach had to carry you—”

“Fucker was going to dive headfirst into the tunnel to go after you!”

Tav shot Karlach a look, to which she grinned. “Plannin’ on hiding that from him, were ya?”

“No, not necessarily, I just—”

“We really should talk about your noble tendencies. If anyone’s going to save the world, I have no doubt it’ll be you, but you do actually need to be alive to do the world-saving. Fight for yourself just as much as you fight for the rest of us.”

Tav sighed in his arms, Gale’s words hitting them as they always did. Like Sune’s own hand twisting their stomach into knots. Before they could respond, he whispered to them, softly enough for them alone to hear: “You don’t need to save me, Tav. You already did.”

[the-everqueen]

“Rose and the Corinthian are both people who need care, in different but complimentary ways, and i think that's part of what fascinates me about pairing them.”

I would say this ask is more of a “Thoughts on Corirose” one, based on your excellent quote/response here from LA Guard Dog part 1 👀

i do not remember saying this, which is funny to me because looking back at my comment replies on that fic, i was clearly burned out from final year of grad school. i'm way more loquacious now that my brain isn't running on fumes and spite. but i DO remember how much i appreciated each comment; those ao3 notifications in my inbox were little sparks of delight amid rejection emails and, later, a wave of onboarding paperwork.

anyways i stand by past me's words. i feel like fandom downplays how much Rose has lost: she's a young adult from a broken home, her mom died and left her with limited material resources to start her own life, she met Unity and then almost immediately lost her, she got her brother back but only after he's been through hell, and now she's his only living guardian. she's never really had a childhood. so it makes sense, to me, that deep down she'd really want to be cared for. she had to be The Responsible One with Lyta, with Jed, with the Endless. when is someone going to watch out for her? and yeah, the implication at the end of s1 is that she has this whole found family who are invested in her, but caring about someone is different from caring for them. also accepting care from people you feel have already given you a lot can be difficult when you're used to being self-sufficient and circumstances have taught you that the only person you can really trust to stick around is yourself. i skip ahead to post-comix in LA guard dog, but even with some distance from the events of the Doll's House arc, she's still a mid-20s woman in a parental role for a traumatized preteen. that's a lot for someone who isn't also a daughter of the Endless and the only remaining adult of her human bloodline.

enter the Corinthian. he's useful for Rose in a few ways: he can't die, he can shoulder some of the responsibilities involved with raising a kid (at very least the stuff that takes minimal skill but maximum brain space, like school schedules and chores and packing lunch). also he's an utter hedonist, which is great for getting Rose acclimated to the idea of having things she likes rather than just what she needs. look, he wanted a fancy coffee so he got her this fancy floral pastry. extrapolating from the comix (including the dreaming run, but i'm cherry picking there), he's very much a person who shows feeling through action, even when that's at direct contradiction with his words. and that's great for Rose, who i imagine has had a lot of people say nice things to her and then utterly fail to show up for her in the ways that matter.

i'm talking about him like he's a tool, which admittedly is how Dream still conceptualizes him to some degree in this au. but he's aware this time around that's not what the Corinthian needs, hence giving him to Rose. i don't know that Rose can think of the Corinthian as an object, based on her experiences and who she is as a person. Rose imagines possibilities that Morpheus could not. so her idea of care for a Nightmare looks different, too, and the crux of the LA guard fic pt. 2 is the question "is that enough?" idk! but i think it matters to the Corinthian. there's a moment in the dreaming comix, during Coco's Year As A Real Boy, where he muses that his bf Sila has become more than a distraction to him--i think someone seeing the Corinthian as a person, beyond his function as a mirror (aka what he can do for/to them), is the realization of a story he's been telling himself for a long time. about him and the Dreaming, about him and Dream.

tl;dr: Coco and Rose are both people who have been positioned as non-subjects in their respective worlds and that means they're both weirdly able to affirm each other's subjectivity.

[aquaticpal]

WIP Wednesday - Chrysalis

So the other day I promised to share something related to this post 🙂 This is a random OoT idea that popped up a few weeks ago, and I managed to nurse it into a full-blown comic script (thanks @aegon-targaryen for listening to my blabs). Now, I have a buuuunnnch of things to do before I have anywhere near the time to draw such a lengthy comic, so it's going to sit in this script form for a long time maybe forever. Still, I wanted to put it out here so that it at least exists in this form 😌

Chrysalis

Rating: G Word count: ~2000 Tags: canon divergence, fix-it fic, healing, let's pretend this is an AU where uhhh Navi doesn't exist

[desert sand dunes - night, around a campfire]

"Hahhh... Sheik, you saved me again..."

"A couple pieces of bread and dried meat was all it took, and you went traipsing across the desert without even that?"

"I had them! It just... didn't last as long as I thought...!

I used to stay out all night in the forest and got by fine just picking a few berries... dunno what happened..."

"You have a body twice the size to feed now. Idiot." "Oh... yeah..."

"Aren't you gonna have some, Sheik? (I feel weird eating by myself...)"

"I ate earlier. No need." "Pff, I know you're just trying to avoid taking down your mask, right? (It's fine, I get it)"

"My hands are occupied."

[Link stretches out under the wide, endlessly vast desert sky, full of stars]

"Thanks for the music. It's a real treat for the last night before the Spirit Temple tomorrow."

"After I clear the last temple... that'll be it, right? Then I'll be able to see Princess Zelda?"

"...Presumably."

"I wonder what she'll be like, after seven years... Hey Sheik, you know where she is, right? Do you talk with her? Have you met her?"

"As if I would divulge that information." "I guess I'll just have to find out tomorrow~"

"What if when you meet her,

she's not the perfect person that you imagine? What if she's actually selfish, or cowardly, or cruel?"

"What if she has blood on her hands?"

"Sheik."

[Link's hand has moved to the Master Sword.]

"You don't like Princess Zelda very much, do you."

"..."

"She is using you."

"She's my friend! She's not that kind of person. And I want to help her."

"Aren't the Sheikah supposed to be loyal to the Royal Family? Are you?"

"That is where my loyalty lies. The Princess can trust me to work for her goal, as can you. I have no obligation to like her as a person.

But perhaps you shouldn't trust me fully, either."

"You don't seem like a bad person. You've been helping me get to all the temples. And you've never tried to do anything bad to me even though you could sneak up on me anytime."

Besides, we're friends, aren't we?"

[plink] "You are far too quick to open your heart to others. You may have missed the past seven years, but in a world like this, there are many who would take the opportunity to strike at that openness."

"It's okay, I'm the Hero. I can take it." "You can't treat your own well-being so frivolously like that!"

"All of Hyrule's fate is dependent on you!"

"In a world like this... people need someone who opens their heart more than ever, don't they?

I'm lucky. I slept through all these years, and I woke up strong - strong enough to fight the evils in this world. Strong enough to help all the people who's been hurt and worn down by years of darkness.

So, I don't mind taking a few nicks or hits if it means giving a bit of hope to someone who needs it. It's what I'm made for.

I don't know where Zelda is, but... I hope she can see it, too. That all over Hyrule things are getting a little better, so wherever she is, hopefully things are a little brighter too."

[His optimism makes his face glow in the firelight. Sheik is silent.]

"She doesn't deserve you."

"You sound jealous." ("Don't be absurd!")

"I-I have to go." "Wait, hold--"

[behind a nearby rock formation, Sheik re-materializes, hands clenched]

===

[shot of clasped, gloved hands - Temple of Time] "...It was I, Zelda. Princess of Hyrule."

"I'm sorry for deceiving you all this time..." [Link steps forward, reaching out, hopeful]

!! [The room shakes, a crystal forms around Zelda]

[her vision blacks out, the last sight being Link inaudibly banging on the crystal]

"...Ganondorf... pitiful man..."

"Six Sages... now!"

"...the road between times... will be closed..."

"Link, give the ocarina to me.

As a Sage, I can return you to your original time with it."

[instead of giving the ocarina, Link reaches out and cradles her outstretched hand, like a wounded thing.]

"Are you all right?" "What... I..."

"You look so sad.

Back then, that time when you were talking as Sheik. You said you didn't like the Princess very much."

"It was my childish whims that threw Hyrule into ruin. I have to make amends for all the souls that suffered the price for my mistake. Most of all, you."

"Can I talk to Sheik?" "I..."

"That's just me, Link." "No"

"Even though Sheik was always behind a mask, It seemed like you could talk more truthfully then."

"Link, this isn't the time..." "This is the time! If you're going to send me back, if you want me to give you the ocarina... then at least I want to hear it from Sheik. I want to hear your true words."

"I..."

[Zelda turns away, huddled into herself]

[but silently and motionlessly, she Shifts]

"Can we go somewhere else?"

===

[Lake Hylia - the island with the warp pedestal]

"It's nice to be here without having to worry you'll run off again."

"You're not gonna run off, right?" "Link, please."

[they sit silently for a moment, looking out over the water]

"Is this what you really want? Will it make you happy?"

"This isn't about that. The people of Hyrule--" "That's not what I asked."

"...It doesn't matter." "I'm asking how you feel--" "It doesn't matter!"

[a silent moment.]

"Why do you hate Princess Zelda so much?"

"She was weak. All she could do was cower and hide. All she could do was wait while others fought and bled for her mistake."

"She befriended a brave, pure-hearted boy, only to take advantage of his kindness. She stole so much from him. From everyone."

"How can you even look at her? After what she's done?"

"..."

"After I woke up from the Sacred Realm, I met a lot of people who needed help. People who were beaten down and tired, and lost their hope and will. It was all they could do to hang on and get through each day, and some of them didn't make it."

"But not Zelda. She survived for seven years, and not only that, she traveled all across the land, even through all the dangers - all to make sure that her people were protected, and her hero could succeed."

"There would've been no hope in this land if she hadn't worked to keep it alive for seven years. And she kept this idiot hero alive, too."

"I think she's very strong. Even stronger than me. And she deserves to smile, too."

[Smiling - it's something she hasn't tried to do in a long time. Behind the mask, she is worn down, but tries feebly to mount one more defense]

"What about you? You deserve to be rewarded for your efforts and sacrifice, more than anyone."

"Wouldn't you rather go back to a world without turmoil? Wouldn't it ease your mind, knowing that you saved the lives of so many?"

"Yeah, but I'll know there's one person I haven't saved."

"The one person I most wanted to save." "Don't"

"I'll go back if you want me to. I'll do it if that's what you think is best, Zelda. But don't do it because you think hurting yourself is the only right thing to do, okay?"

"I swore, when I met you, that I would protect you, no matter what. Don't make me do something that would hurt you."

[Link takes her hand, and places the ocarina in it.]

"Please, promise me that whatever you choose... you'll do it with a smile."

[Cradling the ocarina, Sheik tries to gather her composure, but she cannot muster a smile. She looks down, defeated]

"...Will you forgive me, if I choose to be selfish?"

"You know what my answer would be. But I think I'm not the one you need to ask that to. Am I right?"

[A vision - Sheik stands looking down at a young Princess Zelda from seven years ago, bloodied and dirtied as if she had just escaped from the castle]

[Slowly, Sheik approaches and stoops to the young girl's level, and reaches out to pull her into an embrace.]

[In the real world, Sheik is wiping at her eyes]

"I'm sorry. Please stay"

[Perhaps, she's saying it to someone else, too. Link holds her, for a long time]

"Look, the sun's coming up."

[still leaning into each other, they look to the brightening horizon]

"This is a lot nicer than last time."

"When I threw a Deku Nut at you and ran away?" "Heh"

[Looking into the light, Sheik reaches up to her mask, and lowers it. She faces the sun for a moment, then looks up to face Link]

"Hi."

"It's good to meet you... at last."

[their faces are so close. She's moved to lean in and kiss him, just a little.]

"Sorry, I..." "Don't be sorry! That was nice. You're... nice."

"Can I kiss you too?" "Link, I..."

"This body... It's a male body." "So?"

"I thought you might not... like..."

"I like you. The real you. Without hiding. Without holding back."

[Blushing but touched, Sheik tucks her hair behind her ear, finally showing her full face.]

"All right, then."

[they do not hold back.]

===

[partially restored castle - Princess Zelda steps out of a political meeting, looking tired. Out of nowhere, Link tugs her around a corner for a kiss]

"L-Link! You can't just--I'm still Zelda!"

"What? Don't worry, no one's gonna see. (Promise)"

"It's not that, I... I thought you just liked... Sheik."

"I told you, I like you. Did you think I wouldn't want to kiss a beautiful princess?

Zel. You're no less kind, or brave, or hardworking, just because you're in a different body."

[she looks down for a moment, emotional, tempted to refuse. But then she looks up, with a smile.] 

"Okay."

[She steps into his arms, and kisses him fully for the first time]

===

[Fishing Hole - golden hour. Link is struggling to reel in a fish]

[Zelda's POV - Link turns, and drops his rod in excitement] "Zel! You made it!"

[full shot - Zelda is dressed in a plain, androgynous tunic and leggings, carrying a small picnic basket. Her hair is free and loosely pulled back, without a crown, without a mask.] "And you brought food!! You're the best person in the world."

"Man, I didn't realize I was starving" "You have to take better care of your own needs, Hero." "I don't have to, I've got you~"

"Here, you should have some too--"

"Oh crud - there's no more?" "I'm sorry. Supplies are still low--" ("No I'm the one who should be sorry!!")

"Well, here - I've got something for you too."

[Link pulls out a glass bottle, filled with strawberries. They're a deep, ripe red - the first splash of color in this black & white comic] "I picked them from the Lost Woods. They've just started growing back recently."

[He holds one up to her lips. A little tentatively, Zelda bites into it - and bursts into tears]

"Zel!? You okay?" "Y-Yes, I just..."

"It's been... a long time since I've had anything so sweet."

"You deserve it."

[Wide shot - she has a little emotional fit in his arms. Color is gradually seeping into the comic.]

[But eventually, the berries get finished.]

"Link - there's one more thing. I..."

[Zelda takes out the Ocarina of Time, and places it into his hands.]

"Zel, this..."

[She gives him a genuine smile, fond and peaceful.] "Keep it. I've made my decision."

[She touches her forehead to his, as they share a moment of joy] "It suits you better, anyway."

[Zelda pulls out her harp, and begins playing a tune.]

[Link raises the ocarina, and joins her in a duet.]

[The musical notes drift into the sky, intertwined over a lush, colorful world.]

[kvetchinglyneurotic]

⭐star⭐ hiiiiiii. I just read the latest chapter (ch 2) of Flightless Birds and my soul has still not reattached. I would love to know your director’s cut thoughts on either:

1) the scene of Jamie going back to get his car and seeing the blood

2) Keeley’s overall struggles with seeing how Roy and Jamie have grown closer without her

If neither of those are striking the iron for you, anything from The Hedgehog’s Dilemma regarding Jamie’s dad’s visit would also be most excellent!

I hope this missive finds you well <3

The scene of Jamie going back to get his car and seeing the blood

This scene just sort of... came upon me as I was writing as a two birds/one stone type of situation. Bird #1 was that I remembered partway through the chapter that Jamie hadn't retrieved his car yet. Bird #2 was that Jamie spends most of the chapter working up to his big breakdown at the end, and that Roy and Keeley aren't fully aware of how badly he's doing — which meant that I needed a) something to trigger the panic attack, and b) for it to happen somewhere neither of them would know that it had happened. And then when I got this ask I realized that I had completely accidentally built in a recurring motif of like. cars as a representation of Jamie's relationship with his dad and how it's inextricably tied up not just with his career as a player but with the wealth that comes with it; how Jamie's constantly trying to buy James' affection or at least stave off his violence with gifts, his entitlement over Jamie's wealth and belongings and indignation when Jamie has something nicer than what James does, how escaping his father means leaving behind things that he loves — Man City and Georgie when he's a teenager and his car, but also that he can get them back, even if it involves confronting some trauma first.

Keeley's overall struggle with seeing how Roy and Jamie have grown closer without her

This was one of the main parts of the fic that I thought about during the planning phase. Keeley and Roy's relationship progresses a little slower in THD than it does in canon just because Roy's not relying on her quite as much for like. all his non-work and non-family social interaction and later is busy taking care of Jamie in the lead-up to his father's visit. At that stage, she's pretty content with how things are going: she has fun hanging out with them separately and together, she doesn't have to listen to them complain about each other quite as much (they still do, but now it's affectionate so it's much less annoying), and Jamie has someone looking out for him in a way she doesn't really feel equipped to do.

And then their fledgling little QPR experiences trial by fire via moving in together at a point where she's both the only one who's able-bodied and not freshly traumatized and working full time, and on top of that already overwhelming situation, being around each other all the time makes it clear that there are ways that Jamie and Roy are close to each other that they aren't with her. I think with Jamie's recovery especially, she's trying really hard not to feel hurt by the fact that Roy is the one he's opened up to about his dad and that he's the one he turns to when he's upset because she does understand, rationally, that it's not a case of Jamie trusting Roy over her but of Roy being the one to discover the abuse and establishing himself as like. The Person Who Looks After Jamie, and also that when Jamie's really upset, he usually wants to be held for a much longer time than she tends to prefer for her cuddle sessions and also isn't especially compatible with her work schedule.

But at the same time, it does make her feel guilty and hurt that she not only can't seem to give him that kind of support while Roy's recovering but that Roy doesn't seem to trust her to do it properly (this, of course, has much more to do with his own hangups that it does with not trusting Keeley, but she doesn't know that), and so there's a part of her that worries she won't have a place in the relationship once they're both doing better, but is also kind of resentful of the fact that she's ended up in this role as the caretaker and the one that has everything together because she likes doing things for her friends and cheering them up when they're having a hard time but she's never been the biggest fan of looking after people, per se. Anyway the solution is communication and they will get there eventually.

James' visit from THD

James' visit in chapters 5 and 6 was the hardest part of the fic to write, not because of the character voice but because he's just such a relentlessly unpleasant to write. From his perspective, the visit is about reasserting control: he deliberately keeps Jamie guessing about their plans, inserts himself into any part of Jamie's life where he can tell Jamie doesn't want him just to show that he can — he doesn't necessarily care about what Richmond training looks like or where he lives, but he wants to show Jamie that he doesn't have anything that isn't also James'. But at the same time, I did want him to feel like a fully-fledged person operating according to his own complex and deeply dysfunctional internal logic. He's petty and malicious and violent but that's probably not how he'd think of himself, you know?