#i want to get so many books but i've gotta finish the ones i already have

[imaginesmai]

Little secrets they have - Batboys headcanon

Trying something new here! Since I'm not really motivated to write for TV show characters, I've tried writing about book ones. What better way to start than with our batboys from Sarah J Mass, Rhysand, Cassian and Azriel.

From now on, I take requests about them and about any of the SJM's characters (from throne of glass, crescent city and acotar). Let me know if you like it, and if you want more.

Plot: the batboys keep a small secret during your relationship, and you find about it.

Rhysand

It would take you a while to figure it out, because boy, does he hide it well.

But eventually, you two would be comfortable enough in your relationship for small secrets to come out.

You discover it during a small retreat to the cabin. Everyone has been really stressed in Velaris because of the upcoming Starfall, so you have decided to take a break in the cabin.

Usually, you go to be way earlier than Rhys, because he stays up working.

Or so he says.

Because in the cabin, there’s no way he can hide the extra bag he has bought with him that weights almost like your own.

You are already in bed, the fire is on and you’ve just finished one of the best sex you have ever have.

“Give me a second, darling. I need to do something”

Tired and happy as you are, you don’t give it a second thought until you find yourself falling asleep and he hasn’t come back.

So you get up, open the bathroom and find out about Rhysand’s little secret.

“I promise that I can explain. It’s not what it looks like”

“Is that mud?”

“It’s actually a clay mask”

The most powerful High Lord in Prythian is surrounded by skin-care products, his face soaked in a blue mask and his hair gathered up in a froggy-style bandana.

There are so many products around that you can’t see the sink or the toilet sink, and the bag on the floor shows you another bunch of them.

Suddenly, the softness of his face and the absence of any type of imperfection make sense. As it does the minutes you lay awake waiting for him when he tells you that he needs to finish something.

You stare at each other for a while, giving you enough time to consider turning around and going to sleep or actually talking about it.

Rhys beat you to it.

“It’s Mor’s fault. She told me I had a wrinkle, and then she bought a cream. And then another”

There weren’t just creams anymore. There were almost fifty small bottles of different colors, shapes and sizes.

Something started beeping and, without breaking eye-contact, Rhys bent over the sink and made enough space to start removing the clay mask with water.

After a few minutes, you discovered there was something absolutely amazing about watching your mate put on different products.

Rhysand noticed that you weren’t leaving and started talking about what he was using and what it was good for. He even let you try some of them in the back of your hand.

You both went to sleep without talking about it and next night he left the bathroom door open for you to join him.

Since that moment, it was kind of a tradition to do your skincare together. A cozy, domestic tradition that you repeated back home. And probably for the rest of your lives.

Cassian

You might have been too blind in your love to notice how loud he snores and the clothes he leaves hanging everywhere.

But when Cassian starts sneaking during the weekends with no explanation, you notice.

It starts as casual “hanging out with the boys, love” and “going for a run, gotta keep the abs firm”.

The boys don’t know what you’re talking about when you ask them about it and the sneakers he uses for running stay clean during the weekend.

You aren’t afraid of him cheating on you because the rest of the days he worships everything you do and kisses the floor you step in. Almost.

When Saturday comes around, though, he leaves for a few hours and comes back as if nothing has happened.

There are a few hypotheses you work with: that he’s stealing Rhy’s wine or Nyx’s sweets, that he’s secretly practicing for karaoke nights at Rita, or that he’s building and hiding snowballs for the annual fight.

None of them are proved right when you decide to walk through Velaris while he’s missing.

You’re walking near the Sidra when you hear a familiar, loud laugh. Then, you look up.

Through the window, you find Cassian where you least expected: surrounded by women, kneeling at their feet and letting them run their fingers through his hair.

The thing is, they aren’t the type of hands you expected.

They were wrinkled, and fragile, and their owners were just as.

“I told you! Renaldo was alive! Our man isn’t that easy to kill”

You look up to the name of the building.

Velaris Elderly Home

In a haze, you enter the place and continue watching Cassian.

Your mate is almost seven foot tall, his shoulders as wide as the TV on the room. His arms strong as steel and thick as trees branch.

And that giant warrior, that snaps enemies in a half and carries swords as heavy as you, is sitting on the ground, watching a novella while older women braid his hair.

Eventually, after realizing Cassian is not only behaving like one of them, he is one of them, he notices you.

His smile falls and the room seems to go colder.

Loss at words, you don’t know what to say until the women around him see you.

“Oh, that must be Y/N! You’re just as pretty as he says! Look at her, does our Cassian treat you well, honey? You better take care of that beautiful girl!”

“Are you hungry, darling? Do you want cookies? Get your girl a seat, lover boy!”

“Finally! We’ve been begging Cassian to bring you for a decade!”

Before you could register, two women grabbed both of your arms and dragged you inside. In a few minutes, you were sitting in a chair, TV long forgotten, surrounded by questions about Cassian.

You looked at him and noticed that he was nervous. About not telling you, about you finding out, about them asking you if he satisfied you in bed. Too stunned to comfort him, you smiled softly.

“Well, he does have a large wingspan”

Turns out that was the right answer, and suddenly you were part of the group. For almost an hour, you answered their questions and heard about this new part of Cassian.

Your mate, who spends his Saturday’s afternoons in the elderly home making them laugh. Who lets these women braid his hair, knit him scarfs and feed him expired cookies.

That night, while you walk home, you do it in silence, closer to Cassian than what you usually walk.

You arrive home in a comfortable silence until he speaks.

“Large wingspan, hm? I guess I am a great lover”

“Yeah, and a great gossiper. Bet you’ve been taking cues from Renaldo”

Cassian laughs and spends the night proving you how good he, not Renaldo, is in bed.

Azriel

As your mate, Azriel is the most honest and open person you have ever met.

You didn’t expect the Shadowsinger to be so close and frank with you, but as the years passed and your bond solidified, you discovered he was.

There is no miscommunication, no fights or disappointment. You talk it out, you share your emotions and take your time to fix things.

So, when almost fifty years after you discover he’s your mate, he doesn’t answer your question right away, you know he’s lying.

Lying to you, about something, and you couldn’t have imagined how sad that would make you feel.

He had missed dinner last night, and this morning, you had asked him before he left for work about it. Without looking at you, he had offered a quick apology and had told you that he was with Rhysand.

Who you had called last night to ask where Azriel was, and hadn’t known about it.

You spend the whole day thinking about it. And the more you think, the more dates you discovered.

That time he was late for Starfall. When he skipped Nyx’s birthday party. After your birthday, when he disappeared for a day.

Of course, being the spymaster he was, he had been able to hide it just fine. And it hadn’t been until this morning that you have caught up with it.

When he comes back, he finds you sitting in the couch with tears in your eyes.

You don’t want to think about it, but your mind keeps coming up with the possibility of cheating. Because, what else could be keep from you?

“Y/N, what’s wrong?”

It’s his voice, full of concern and love, that has you breaking down.

Azriel holds you while you cry, constantly stroking your hair and side. You finally blurt it out between sobs, shaking so hard he can hardly understand you.

“What – cheating? Dove, why would I cheat on you? I love you more than my own life. I would rather –“

“You lied, Az! I – Last night I talked to Rhys. You… you lied”

When he doesn’t say anything else, you actually consider that he cheated. That he’s about to leave you for some other girl. Before you can answer, he beats you to it.

“I… was at Rhys house. Not with Rhys, though. I’m sorry I lied to you”

“He told me –“

“He didn’t know I was there, because I was with Feyre”

Feyre, the new High Lady that you loved with all your heart and that has turned your lives upside down for the best. That has given you all a night court heir and almost lost her life in the process.

That is Rhysand’s mate and life, both of them in love just like you and Azriel.

Before you could develop further in your thoughts, he continues.

“There was a new episode of Say yes to the dress. And… I wanted to have dinner with you, I really did, but Analise is choosing the drees her sister wants. And her family is there, too. It’s a beautiful dress, I just wanted… I’m sorry, dove. I shouldn’t have lied to you”

“You’re – you left me – you’re watching say yes to the dress?”

Azriel likes to dress nice, and every now and then would tell you to buy one of the latest items of certain collection. You know he likes clothing, that unlike Cassian who can wear the same trousers for a week, Azriel knows the difference between dark blue and marine blue.

You raise your head from his chest and listen to him explain that Feyre had showed him the show a few years ago, and that since then, it has become kind of an obsession. That he, Feyre, Mor and sometimes Amren meet to watch it.

That he hasn’t told you because once you watched it together and you said it was a waste of time.

Needless to say, that from that moment, you all watch the show together. You find a new side of Azriel that likes to point out every detail of the dresses, that know the story of each couple and that talks about it for days with no end.

It is also fair to say that you dust out your weeding dress and that you spend a fun night together, making up for mean comments and harmless lies.

[c-m-stuff]

Casino

Spencer Reid x Female!Raeder

-Description: You and Spencer are having a secret relationship. When you got lost in a casino, Spencer was mad at a certain person.

-Warnings: Fluffiness, angst

-Word count: 919

-Note: (Repost from Wattpad!) I hope, you enjoy this story as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Masterlist

Y/N POV:

Las Vegas, the city known for his many casinos and night life. The city were my secret boyfriend was born and raised. The city were we just finished up a case, but due to circumstances, we could only fly back first thing in the morning.

It was evening, we all were already in the hotel. This was the first time I was in Vegas, and I've always wanted to go to a casino. Not to gamble, but just to look around. Feeling the vibe.

I walked out of my hotel room, wanting to ask the genius to come with me. As I just closed the door, Derek walked by.

'Hey pretty girl, wanna come with me to the casino?'

'Derek Morgan, you read my mind. I just wanted to go to there.' I teased, before I hooked up my arm into his. We saw each other as big brother and little sister, always teasing the other.

There wasn't a casino in this hotel, but luckily there was one a few miles away. When we arrived, my eyes went wide, and I couldn't hide the impressed look on my face. It was huge.

'So pretty girl, what are your plans here?'

'Just looking around. I'm really not gonna gamble, just wanna feel the vibe. What about you?'

'Feeling the vibe was my plan as well.'

We went towards a large table, some people were cheering, other were grumbling. It was pretty cool to watch them work, the poker faces they've got, and the confidence they had.

'I'm going to grab us some drinks.' I told Derek, as he nodded in confirmation, while I went to the bar.

I ordered us some drinks, and as I wanted to go back, Derek was no longer in sight. I placed the drinks on a table, trying not to panic, as I couldn't find the muscular man. I went to look for him, but the casino was huge, you could easily walk a while to reach the other side.

I looked everywhere, but no sign of Derek.

_________________________

Spencer's POV:

I was reading my book, as I heard a knock on the door. I went to open it, and got greet by a very worried Morgan.

'Reid, you gotta help me. I lost (Y/N).' I immediately got concerned as well, hearing the name of the love of my life.

'W-what? You lost (Y/N)? Where? How?' I spoke in a more high pitch voice than I wanted.

'We went to a casino. We wanted to feel the vibe and just look around. She went to get us some drinks, while I went to the restroom. When I got back, I couldn't find her anymore.' he explained, as I got angry for losing (Y/N).

'Did you call her?' I asked, as he nodded his head.

'Yes, but it goes straight to voicemail. I don't even think she took her phone with her.'

'Reid, that casino is huge.' Morgan added, putting emphasis on the word "huge".

'Let's go, she easily panics when she get lost or don't know what to do.' I said, knowing she once told me.

My worrying only grew, when I saw the huge casino. Not only my worrying grew, but also my anger.

'Morgan, how could you lose her?' my voice was louder, anger visibly in my expression.

'I'm sorry, Reid, but you're not the only one who is worried.'

'Let's just split up. Call me when you find her.'

We both went different ways, calling out her name and searching everywhere. After a while searching, I finally saw my beautiful girlfriend. She looked absolutely terrified, a single tear escaping her eye, as her gaze met mine.

I ran into her arms, hugging her tightly, while I gently rubbed her back in attempt to comfort her.

'Spence...' relief washed over the both of us, as I pulled her even closer.

'I was so scared, Spence. I left my phone in my hotel room, and I couldn't find Derek. I forgot the way to the hotel and it's dark outside, knowing our jobs, it's very dangerous, especially for women and-' I stopped her anxious rambling, by pressing my lips on her soft ones. It didn't took long for her to kiss me back, finally relaxing a bit more.

'Pretty boy is finally getting some.' we jumped away, looking at a very excited Morgan.

'So, how long?' he asked us, but my girlfriend was quicker in answering him.

'How could you lose me? Where were you?' she began lightly hitting his chest, expressing her feelings.

'I'm sorry! It wasn't my intention!' he took her hitting hands and wrapped her in a hug. I could see the relief as well on his face.

'Congratulations you two. You make a nice couple.'

'Thanks.'

'I'm going to get you back, Derek Morgan. Watch your back.' I needed to suppress the laughing, threatening to come to the surface. With that last sentence being said, she took my hand and dragged me out of the casino, leaving an astonished Morgan behind.

_________________________

[wolfstarhaven]

Hi!!!!!!! Long time lurker first time asker here—do you have any interesting fics that take place in the summer? I feel like I've been losing myself in nostalgia for being a teenager since it started getting hot by me and I'd love to read a fic that compliments that feeling well!

Hi🌸 You read my mind, long time lurker — I’ve been thinking of putting together a proper summery-nostalgic list for some time now. Your request finally made me do it(: So here you go! My favourite summer wolfstar fics, all of them with that sweet, soft nostalgic touch☀️

the summer you let your hair grow out

by ladymemebeth (20k)

in which sirius decides to go to remus' house when he runs away, rather than james'. remus finds this situation to be trying in more ways than one. includes gratuitous references to twentieth-century cinema and music.

Themes: summer at remus’; pov!remus; disowned Sirius; pining; friends to lovers; first time.

*wonders bright

by unwholesome_gay (5k)

Sirius spends a few weeks at the Lupins' place during the summer after sixth year.

Themes: summer at remus’; pov!sirius; friends to lovers; fluff; first kiss.

*the apple caught between your teeth

by drowsyanddazed (13k)

The warm, July sun is unadulterated in its naked heat; blisteringly sweet and unbearingly heavy. It makes Sirius’ shirt cling to his chest, turns his bones lazy, and it colours Remus’ cheeks with a dusting of honey freckles.

So many freckles.

So many that Sirius wonders where they all hide in the frosty, winter months.

Themes: summer at remus’; disowned sirius; pov!sirius; friends to lovers; coming out; pining; so well-written I could cry.

*June, and Other Natural Disasters

by montparnasse (5k)

Sirius talks, begs, and bribes Remus into a spontaneous trip to Brighton the summer of their graduation. Remus loses all sense of direction; Sirius loses his shirt; Remus kisses the last moth-eaten vestiges of his sanity a long, sloppy goodbye.

Themes: summer trip; pov!remus; pining remus; friends to lovers; sexual tension and smut; poetic prose.

*Everything Under The Sun

by moongnome (26k)

The summer of '76. Remus wants Sirius. Sirius doesn't know what he wants.

Themes: slow burn; friends to lovers; shit communication; friends with benefits sort of; pov!remus; pining remus; this is technically unfinished but it can be read as finished!; I love this so much it’s crazy.

*A Brief History of Dragons

by eyra (23k)

Sirius moves to Cornwall for the summer and meets a rude, beautiful boy who is writing a book that may or may not be about dragons.

Themes: muggle!au; writer!remus; pov!sirius; strangers to lovers; Arthurian legend; everybody and their mother has read and loved this; but it’s very summery so it’s gotta be here!!

tomorrow, when the world is free

by turntechnodhead (2k)

Sirius, in a tour-guide voice: “The White Cliffs of Dover, part of the North Downs formation, is the region of English coastline facing the Strait of Dover and France. The cliff face, which reaches a height of 110 metres, owes its striking appearance to the composition of chalk accented by streaks of black flint-”

“Padfoot, mate, you never told us you could read,” says James. Sirius whacks the back of his head with the guidebook.

Themes: road trip; pov!remus; pining remus; fluff; pre-slash.

Camping, Comfort, and Clichés

by oliverdalstonbrowning (5k)

Remus goes on a camping trip with his friends, and discovers all the comfort and clichés that go with it.

Themes: camping; post-Hogwarts; sharing a bed; pov!remus; friends to lovers; jealous remus; fluff.

*Hard To Find

by accioromulus (13k)

The air conditioning is already broken, Sirius's back has been effectively glued to the leather seat via sweat, and this road-trip may have been a Very Bad Idea.

Themes: road trip; muggle!au; pov!sirius; pining; so so soft and summery; friends to lovers.

Out There

by halictus (21k)

Sirius has to go backpacking to fulfill a college graduation requirement. He is comfortable in his own skin, he has friends, he has passions. But he's still learning how to fit himself into loosely-defined spaces. Remus is a graduate student leading the trip. He loves nature, and backpacking, and being outside, and smiling, and having lots of energy. They both have some learning to do—not necessarily tactfully.

Themes: muggle!au; backpacking; nature; strangers to lovers; good discussion on privilege!

one for the road

by rojohbi (4k)

Piling into the car was uncomfortable and cramped, but there was something oddly satisfying about sitting on ratty blankets in the backseat, a box of fresh comfort food at his feet and Sirius’ legs splayed over his lap as the other backseat-inhabitant nestled himself into the corner and almost immediately began snoring. James met his eyes through the rearview, and this time when he saw the knowing smile, Remus smiled right back.

Themes: road trip; pov!remus; pining remus; self-esteem issues (remus); accidental confession; genderfluid sirius.

the private kind of purple

by greenscape (6k)

Post-grad summer. They are reaching for things they cannot name.

Or, it's four days out of Hogwarts and Sirius and Remus go wild camping in Scotland.

Themes: camping; light angst; soft and well-written af; friends to lovers.

*Beneath a Big Blue Sky

by eyra (68k)

Sirius and James accidentally find themselves on a Yorkshire farm during lambing season. The farmer’s son thinks that’s a bit annoying, actually.

Themes: muggle!au; sheep farm; pov!sirius; this is a must-read for everyone.

*Light in August

by orestesfasting (21k)

Summer, 1977. With the full moon approaching, Sirius heads up to the Lupins' countryside cottage to make himself useful. Or to make a complete and utter arse out of himself, because really, that's all he can seem to do around Remus these days.

Themes: THE summer wolfstar fic; summer at remus’; friends to lovers; pov!sirius; pining; sharing a bed; beautifully written it’s actually insane.

honey, i belong with you, only you.

by jeonism (4k)

remus was all honey brown hair and eyes that glittered golden in the sun, with a peachy flush across his freckles and legs that seemed to stretch for miles. sirius was screwed.

Themes: summer at remus’; pov!sirius; pining sirius; friends to lovers; lots of kissing; fluff.

*Our Blood, Still Young

by templeg (15k)

It's nearly the last day of fifth year, and Sirius really isn't looking forward to the summer.

Themes; friends to lovers; funny; pov!sirius; smut; awkwardness and fluff; it’s summer for most of it; a classic.

*Another Bright Day

by rilla (20k)

It's 1978 and the Marauders have just left school. James has fallen for Lily, Sirius is smarting about it, and Remus has complicated feelings of his own that he needs to work out during the last summer before they all have to find their way into the real world.

Themes: post-hogwarts; first war; holiday by the sea; pov!remus; pining remus; beautiful prose!!

Fearless Liabilities

by femme_de_lettres (200k)

Summer camp. Six weeks of planning activities, leading campers, and getting up to no good. It's no different than the last decade that Remus and his friends have spent in rural Wisconsin. Except Remus' heart keeps trying to tell him that he's in love with his best friend, Sirius can't believe he's fallen for the one person who he knows is unequivocally straight, James is starting to lose faith that Lily will ever actually consider going on a date with him, and Peter? Peter's just trying to keep his friends from getting in over their heads.

Themes: muggle!au; summer camp; long boy; American au; homophobia; panic attacks; fluff.

Heat

by LadyAmina (2k)

The summer air is too warm. The campfire isn't helping. Neither is Sirius's head in his lap. Neither is the burning blood in his veins. Remus is overwhelmed and something has to give.

Themes: camping; pov!remus; remus is jealous and very emotional about it poor baby; fluff.

blue, orange

by Avvu (5k)

It's the first summer after Hogwarts, and they have nothing else to talk about than Peter's dead father. / There are blue and orange postcards on the fridge door, and behind them, there are words Sirius knows by heart.

Themes: angst; first war era; canon compliant; the ending is sort of happy but also not that happy because you know what happens later yk.

Ocean Above & Sky Below

by grandilloquism (8k)

Sirius, adrift and floundering at the advanced age of 23, rents out a mansion by the sea— as you do— in an effort to recapture his happiness. It works surprisingly well.

Themes: post-Hogwarts; no war; pov!sirius; growing up; friends to lovers.

I'm Glad I'm Your Favourite

by aftgray (10k)

just a wolfstar get-together oneshot that takes place in the summer of 1976 (between the Marauders' fifth and sixth year)

Themes: post The Prank; disowned sirius; sharing a bed; fluff.

Motion Sickness

by oscarwildechilde (46k)

The Lupins are moving again, and Remus is determined to be miserable following his disastrous fifth year and the fallout of Sirius' prank. Not speaking to any of his friends, he's resigned to go at it alone. That is, of course, until he finds out that he's moved to the same town as Lily Evans.

Themes: post The Prank; centred on the lupin family; Lily-Remus friendship; disowned sirius; friends to lovers; fluff.

Reeled

by lunchbucket (5k)

Remus decides to finally spend a summer day with his childhood best friend, Sirius, after not seeing him for three years. But when old feelings quickly start to resurface, Remus is left feeling like no time has passed at all.

Themes: childhood friends reunited; pov!remus; pining remus; fluff.

(* = personal favourite)

I hope you’re all having a lovely summer so far🌸

xx Elliot

[xetlynn]

Hiatus?

So I think this was my longest Hiatus I've had in a while. Honestly I don't know. I can't believe it's fucking July already, it's insane how time has been flying by for me.

This obviously isn't the first time I've done this, probably won't be the last. I'm going to be writing the last book for Twilight soon. I already have the chapter ideas written in a notebook I just gotta get typing away which is the difficult part for me lately.

I've had a lot of personal stuff happen these past few months and my motivation to write completely disappeared. I barely went on social media during this time. I was off of everything basically.

I also am continuing to write for Hunger Games. Once Twilight is over on here I think I'm going to get into another Fandom. But I would live to finish the first thing I started. I can't believe that's also coming to an end. I've learned a lot about my writing and I think I know how to be better.

I want to write an actual novel in my life and this is such great practice. I love taking in everyone's opinions.

Thank you to everyone who has been reading my work, enjoying it and all the love! I apologize for how many Hiatus's I've been on, but thank you to the one's have stayed for so long and kept up!

If anyone would still like to be in the taglist that isn't already let me know and I'll add you immediately!

[oswednesday]

Ah okay yes so! I haven't finished the whole book yet but I have doubts it would come up again anywhere else-- overall I've greatly enjoyed it except ONE THING really left me feeling disappointed and kind of confused, and it's (idk what numbers because the pages aren't numbered..?) the first 2 pages of bills backstory, which is before he left/destroyed his home world. I was very much hoping the book would dive deeper into the flatland-esque lore that's been hinted at both in the show and the bill ama that follows the og flatland idea that more sides = higher in society etc, which would imply Bill was one of the more subjugated shapes, and while I can't remember far enough back to the ama about where the 3D dimension came in, it's probably safe to say him breaking into it (be it by intrinsic power he had or power he obtained somehow) was a way he would become a higher being. I found it strange that in the tbob, they story just seems to be that Bill was a normal dude everyone liked, his sight into the 3rd dimension was merely incidental, and like accidentally destroyed the world in the process? Which like, maybe the argument that could be made here is that Bill wrote it and he's lying, which I could believe maybe for the second half perhaps pretending he can't exactly remember what happened or something. But why would he lie about the first part, if in the past he already alluded to how he was seen as lesser in his home world? and wouldn't it only be MORE convincing to make the reader of the book trust him if he were to be truthful about the sad aspect to his past where he was mistreated, because that's obviously something everyone can empathize with? It's strange, it reads to me more like a word of God choice ....but why?

oh my god i feel soooo many things about this i gotta collect my thoughts in some sort of order

but i would frankly be astonished if i was wrong, my take away from the book as a whole tbh, is that alex actually read the flatlands between the ama and making the book gdgdgdgdgfdg

if not for the first time, then a refresher i think the treatment of women in Society and bill's interaction with them is a major highlight in the book; like his interaction with women is a much bigger focus in a way that feels tied to how much hes downplaying the destruction of reality and also his interaction with men as well and what we can extrapolate from like the victorian style culture the book presents but, like entering a space where its intentional and not just an author wiggling material about into a different shape , i think bill's goal with like the narrative crafting is showing the potential Next Guy that hes a really cool dude you want to party with him hes hypemanning himself, like i think it speaks to like the driving force behind his actions and the function/purpose this book really has that he doesnt not even think to play up the victim and crank up the sob story for the reader

he does do a lot of victim blaming and a lot of woe is me about certain parts but not in anyway that feels like he understands what and why hes even saying it, it all feels built to deftly avoid -hey that shouldnt have happened to me Period- hes like gutting himself for attention too with it, like he wants to be seen having value and being like uh yeah i was underclass will make him feel unimportant, is why i think that bit gets underplayed, and i think with the lying to me at least it came off as like the truth of the matter is like he can say whatever and no one exists to fact check him like hes told the stuff so many times in so many different ways to just get what he wants --does he even know the truth of the matter anymore? does it like, matter to anyone whatever he says ever anyway? like its not really important to Anyone, hes the only thing like him to exist ever forever and no one is ever going to be able to Understand him again

was my interpretation of all that but it is, also perfectly possible that no one ever looked at the ama ever again fdfsdfdsfd

[dainesanddaffodils]

okay so I think I have maybe like 2 mutuals who are ffxiv enthusiasts, but I gotta yell into the void about my warrior of light and the fact that, in true oc fashion, she went and did her own thing without my consent and now I gotta deal with all the feelings it is giving me

so, my partner finished endwalker last year and Had Many Emotions about it and afterword I said, sure, put me in Character Creation For Fun I Won't Do Anything About It

but then I made a cute little Au Ra and named her Cimorene to reference my fav childhood book series and I was like, oh no I love her I guess I'll have to put her through The Trauma that is this whole game

(I know there is much trauma, again, because I witnessed my partner finishing endwalker and she also would tell me things about what was going on, vague enough - and long ago enough - that I'm not like SUPER spoiled on what I have ahead of me, but like, enough that I know shit is Sad)

but ANYWAY I was still pretty casual about this because, friends, I am not a Gamer. The last game I played, that wasn't a Mariokart/Mario Party/Smash that I've played at a friend's house, was like... on my family game cube 15+ years ago. I want to be a gamer but my brain can't find time for it... until now

so I'm casually trucking along through a realm reborn doin my little white mage quests and meeting the characters my partner has cried about, especially this one guy called thancred - of whom I had heard quite a lot about and my brain had already decided, I want that one.

(he's voiced by Taliesin Jaffe at first, he's a pretty white haired anime boy with trauma, he's got horrible coping mechanisms, what was I supposed to do? to quote Richard Gansey, "Crushed and Broken, just the way women like 'em")

so that was like in the back of my mind because obviously my little baby wol has to go through a lot and he has to go through a lot (most of which I am well aware of) before that's going to take off and even then I already imagine it's going to be a sort of background tension they refuse to actually speak on but both just Know for like, ever (yes my favorite ship is Roy and Riza from FMA why do you ask)

but then I'm like a little over halfway through this first installment and a bunch of awful things happen to my baby for the first time and I'm kinda invested in how she's having a kind of terrible time and the first group of people she'd felt some kind of belonging with are in danger and she feels lost and helpless -

and my partner is sitting next to me watching me play and starts getting excited about the fact that I'm close to meeting another character

that character is haurchefant

and I had never heard them talk about him before so I didn't really know who he was, but he's the first person to be genuinely kind to my warrior after several very bad days. they're in a fortress in an eternal winter and he's still the warmest person she's met in a very long time...

and I thought, oh that's so nice I'm glad she got someone in her corner now after all that shit, anyway moving on

but then, like for the following few days I kept. thinking about it. about how much that would have meant to her, about how lonely she had been feeling before meeting him and how, now that she's found that, she kind of just, wants to be around him

and it hit me that, without my own consent on it, Cimorene had said, I want that one.

so now I have to deal with my baby's first love (which, judging by my partner and her friends reactions when I told all of this to them, is going to be a fucking tragic first love) when I hadn't expected to deal with that at all and now I'm like really really invested in this dumb game

(this got way longer than expected, I just had to Yell. also this is probably a precursor for things to come. I may be reblogging Final Fantasies up in here before long)

[mistfallengw2]

Done with the story, and boy howdy am I happy with this expansion~

So, let's get the easy ones out of the way: map design and music are just top notch, even more than usual. Lost count of the amount of times I got lost exploring, it's all just damn neat, and I'm not even done. Likewise, I got so many goosebumps due to the music, and now that I'm past spoilers, I'm due to sit down and properly listen to the full soundtrack. Also, sound design has always been awesome as well, and each time they move up a level.

Story was pretty damn good and DENSE with stuff for lore nerds to chew on. GW2 is back to doing what it does best, and the worldbuilding through dialogue and books has been a blessing this time around. So many of the interesting things "forgotten by the story" got addressed or aknowledged, and I kinda like that we've been out of the loop for a while even before the SotO stuff (we can't be everywhere, and that's a good thing) so that it can be done organically. The Tyrian Alliance have some of my fave dialogue (oh Dougal, hang in there buddy) and books, and MAN the hints at potential future expansions have me running up walls. Also all my homies hate Isgarren's floaty ass and I'm here for it (and for poor Frode who has to wrangle him). The investigative parts are such a pearl of writing, piecing together what happened in Gavril through texts found around the map before the bloodstone story step was SO satisfying, and in general I loved each build-up. I expected things from Waiting Sorrow, and while what I got wasn't what I expected, I love her already (you can whoop Isgarren's supposed ass, don't hold back dear). I've seen people complain about Poky being Braham 2.0, which is fair, but honestly I'm here for it and I really want the two of them to meet and be friend (even Alder thinks the same, come on!). Can't wait to dwelve in all the other collections and achievements I haven't done yet, what I got done so far has been quite fun.

Gameplay? Sure the spears are awesome, the warclaw is fun (gosh the chain-race mechanic in those story fights? Perfection.), but the events and hearts are the kind of small scale stuff that makes me adore GW2, because I like being useful to people in mundane yet meaningful ways and it makes every part of the world feel lived in. I love that they reused a ton of older minigames and event structure for the new maps, and I haven't been so "at home" in maps since Grothmar.

Speaking of homes, the Homestead... Haven't touched it much because I wanted to focus on finishing story before going away for a few days + F2 being bugged for me. Given what I've seen, I'm glad I stocked up on mats, but I'll keep doing that and leave the actual decorating to when I have a nebulous "enough". With the story done, I will not respond of the emotional damage I will soon suffer. Expect posts uncomprehensible keysmashes under screenshots, I can't promise more (might survive since emotes don't seem possible for the alts, and while sad I do know that could have slain me).

My only sore points have been mostly resolved or are known bugs, and I'm trying to make my peace with the warclaw's animation speed ruining an otherwise perfect mount.

Could ramble a lot more, but all in all? If this is what we get after the teething pains of SotO, I'm sold on all future expansions and more. (And I should probably get started with GW1, huh)

Now to think about my OCs... For sure this is a expansion all about Aurelia and Ellara with a side of Zehmik, but gotta see about the rest...

[jezabatlovesbats]

Like I said already, I graduated high school this year. So naturally, because I'm somehow both lazy and busy at the same time, I don't draw anything for the occasion like I wanted to until the literal DAY before I start college. (Yeah, I'm not joking- my first day of college is tomorrow.)

Just because I've come this far since I joined Wattpad as a 7th grader doesn't mean I know how I did it. Oh, wait- yes I do. I do know. I guess I don't know my own brain. Anyway, it's because I had, and still do, a burning desire to reach out to you and tell you about all the silly little stuff I had on my mind. I also wanted to get to know people all around the cyber world who liked the same stuff I liked. (I hope I can find someone who does in my art college.) I wanted y'all to know that Unikitty and Minecraft: Story Mode were (and still are) my two most favorite things ever. For months, I begged my parents for it, and I eventually got it for Christmas. Over the years, I've come to like more shows, games and movies. I even realized that I liked doing musical theater, too. Since I joined Wattpad, I've expanded my posting to DeviantArt, this site, YouTube, and more.  I've probably told you all of this many times before, but I say it for a reason.

As I also said already, high school was as fun of an experience as it was... interesting. I couldn't finish my freshman year, and I missed my entire sophomore year, and if you survived 2020, you probably know why. I still passed, though. I think that junior and senior year made up for that. I was in the school musical both of those years, I got to attend my first prom junior year, and I went to Thespian Fest senior year.

Maybe the real high school experience was the friends we made along the way, as I've joked. But I wanted to surround myself with people I could get together with. As SpongeBob said, "I only want to hang out with my friends." And I did, 'cause we made every day the best day ever, especially the night we graduated. (The trampoline park we went to afterwards had some killer chicken tenders!) I took one of my friends to see Elemental before she went out of state for her college. I still keep in touch with a lot of them. Still, I'm really gonna miss everyone, and I wish them luck in their future endeavors.

As soon as school let out, my family took me on a trip to celebrate the fact that I graduated, and I made a video about it. You can watch it on my channel if you'd like.

But, I digress! There are a bunch of people here who I've just gotta show my gratitude for. You guys are part of why I keep going in life.

For @joyseer24, @agent-egg, @sundove88, and @pinkiemeowstic89, some of the earliest people I remember interacting with me.

For @erin-the-epic and @clg-artisa, who never fail to put a smile on my face.

(Also, special thanks to all the Unikitty fans here and on YouTube who called me out on my BS back in 2021.)

To @nevaehjwilliamsvaeh, a fan of Mao Mao and Six. I always love seeing you in my notifications!

@pocketlad, thank you for being my lad.

For @federthenotsogreat. It's nice to have a fellow Mario & Luigi fan to chat with.

@generalfoxy21, thanks for liking my posts and tagging me in your picrews.

To my fellow lovers of WALL-E: @cosmo-naute, @ohthewhomanity, and @defineshitposting. Computer, define friendship- the love that we shared.

For folks like @hazed-miner, @tailsofairies, and @milliemakesmistakes. Thanks to all of you cube kids for liking my Minecraft: Story Mode stuff.

To @choupiee. Anybody who likes both Unikitty and MC:SM stuff is a friend in my book.

There are also more Unikitty fans I have to thank, including @glitzycatart, @passionatepinkkittynew, @lizatheeddsworldaddict, @theunikingdom, and @doomlordsbutfunni.

@keith-neil, thank you for your Unitober challenge! I had a great time participating!

@askthechronoverse, I've got you to thank for liking my posts, reblogging them, and asking questions on the Big Bright World blog. And, thanks for keeping the Unikitty and Lego Movie fandoms alive. It's come to the point where I consider you a true friend, Fabri.

And to all my other watchers who weren't mentioned here, thank you for watching me and sticking by me. I don't know how to end this, so I'm gonna say that life is weird. 

[aquaquadrant]

hey aqua, i'm here to ramble about your stupidly amazing au that's got me bouncing off the walls between chapters being posted

firstly, i put all the fics in a doc (because you know, I gotta keep track of what i've read and haven't read, and it's totally not because i want to save it forever and pass it on to my grandchildren)

the doc contains the warnings, summaries, a/n's and everything in between but i wouldn't think it would make a huge difference to the 100K WORDCOUNT

so here is is, the horrifying word count that is honestly longer than most actual published novels and the amount of pages, which to be honest, would be larger if this was actually printed in book size (font size proportionately to the page size), to which the page number would be.... too much, honestly. even I don't want to calculate that and i'm insane

now i assume you knew all this already, since you probably have also been writing this in a google doc to keep track of it, but then again docs slows down dramatically under 397 pages of brainrot-inducing writing so i dont expect you to be using it too often. if you are, congratulations and have a gold star

it's more of i'm collecting useless bits of information like this to show to whoever has read the series, because it's so good, it's so ridiculously amazing, and it so could be turned into a book if someone tried hard enough and i need people to back me up

heck, it's written so much better compared to most novels, it's just that good. i even turn to it when i don't feel like writing. i read it, and then through some miracle, i have all the writing talent and motivation in the world, seemingly having absorbed it from your work.

tldr: htpau is amazing. if you haven't read it you should read it. and it's that good that it literally could be a book. zero exaggeration. (can you tell that this thought has kept me awake many nights)

now hopefully you weren't too baffled to see such a long ask in your inbox, and hopefully you don't question me, as someone who hasn't read a proper novel in years, who has basically reread every chapter once or twice basically as soon as it comes out

i don't need therapy, i need more of your writing. (because hels no does chapter nine end like this) ba dum tss

and then, i leave you, with a gold star and many thanks ⭐

HAGAJDHJA HOLY SHIT

i do use google docs but i make a new one for every chapter for the reason u mentioned, once they’re past a certain page count it gets real slow and i don’t have the patience for that. so uh yeah, i don’t think i ever bothered to calculate the total running word count. it’s not the longest fic i’ve ever written, and i don’t think it will be by the time i finish it, but that’s definitely a NOT INSIGNIFICANT number of words, goddamn.

someone did bind one of my fics into an actual hard cover book once, just for their own personal use. man, that was sick. now i don’t think i’d ever try to alter a fic of mine to actually publish it, cuz so much of what i write hinges too much on the original content, but fan-bindings are A-OKAY so long as i get to see pics :3

anyway, no worries about the long ask, i love hearing from u guys. i’m flattered u went thru the trouble of consolidating it and i’m glad ur enjoying the au!

[doctorghoti]

Tokyo Debunker: A Review

I just finished Episode 3's storyline, which I think is pretty far in to give a proper review of this game. If you want a TL;DR version, I like the story but find the other mechanics overwhelming and not always implemented well to the point I can't exactly recommend the game in this stage. And I definitely wouldn't spend real money on it. For more specifics, keep on reading.

Story

The story is simple enough: you play as a girl who gets swept into magic shenanigans. After getting cursed by an anomaly, you are made to go to a magic high school with seven dorms. Because of another event that happened right after you got into school, you also have the ability to enhance some students' powers, so now you gotta hang out with all these boys with supernatural abilities. What is a girl to do around all these ikemen?

I've made the Twisted Wonderland comparison in joke posts already, but I will say this story seems to have more focus on the rivalry and tensions between not just the dorms but those with power and those without (this school has regular human students as well). While I love (nay, obsess) over TWST, I have to give props to Debunkers for feeling a little more fleshed out in terms of school interactions. Feel like TWST's dorm rivalry happened in Book 2 and Book 4 before being kinda brushed off. This game also goes a little more into horror territory, but not to the extent you may have seen in YouTube ads. It also isn't afraid to get graphic, but whether that makes it edgier or "edgier" is up to player discretion.

The characters are also pretty unique once you get to know them past their initial profiles when starting the game. Many of them still have secrets at this stage, and I keep coming back to this game specifically because I want to know more about them. The story, however, is where many of the positives end.

Fighting

In order to continue the story, at some points you’ll need to do cases, otherwise known as "beat up some monsters." The higher levels you reach, the more of the story you can read. That’s fair enough, and it’s a mechanic in many gacha games. However, there’s hiccups that make it harder than it should be.

There are three elements, with each character having one. Simple enough. Both your characters and the enemies have an element, and using elemental weaknesses to your advantage makes fighting easier. You know what doesn’t make that component easier? Having to memorize all your cards’ elements.

Unlike Twisted Wonderland or Magia Record, you cannot tell what element your enemy is going to be until you’re in the fight. Also unlike those games, you can’t even see the elements your cards have unless you’re in the leveling screen, meaning there’s no way to prepare your team without going back and forth between the teams menu (which doesn’t show elements), the leveling menu, and the case itself if you don’t remember your enemy’s element.

The nice thing, however, is that you can press the skip button on fights and get your outcome instantly. So while there is a grind, you don't have to watch your screen. The fights are all automatic as well, so you don't have to do anything, really. In terms of strategizing, however, the latter may not be the most beneficial, especially since, again, elements are a component in fighting. If it weren't for the fact I have to do cases to read the story, I wouldn't do cases at all. Not just for the reasons above, but also the reason below.

Leveling

Too. Fucking. Much. There are the basic components, like level and equipment, but there is so much friggin’ equipment. There's the ward card, which is a type of boost you get through summoning or getting to certain parts of the story/getting to a certain level and which can be leveled up; there's earrings, perfume, rings, necklaces, and brooches, which are equipment you get through the AFK system (more on that later) or, as I literally just learned today, through crafting; and there are guardian spirits, which you get from the spirit shop, and which can be leveled up as well. There's also gems, which you can equip to ward cards and the jewelry/perfume you craft but not the ones you earn.

A lot, right? But none of that even touches on potential (which levels specific stats of your character card but I still don't quite get), the special attributes of the ward cards, the potency grade vs level of ward cards, link bonuses for characters and ward cards, the grading system for wards, equipment, spirits-- I think these long paragraphs make my point for me. The amount of areas to keep track of is overwhelming. And save for the jewelry from AFK mode, pretty much all other items have to be summoned with some in-game currency, and in-game currency is also hard to keep track of with how many types there are.

Now, in good news, AFK mode allows you to collect a lot of the main items you need for basic leveling and a lot of the currency. Along with the more basic jewelry, you get apples (needed for leveling) and a few other items needed for leveling. But with all the other aspects to consider, it's not the most helpful thing in the world.

Gacha

Now, I've made little mention of the gacha mechanic in this gacha game. Simply put, it's atrocious. It's hard to earn gems, but that's nothing new for this game type. However, the pull rates make the grind worse. One only achieves pity at 500 pulls. Unless you buy gems with real life money, no way are you going to hit 500 on any limited run. I have 14 characters right now, enough to make two full squads with two guys to spare, but only 2 of them are SR. Like Magia Record, you don't just draw for characters, you draw for ward cards as well, which makes getting characters harder. I have more SR ward cards than characters. Maybe I'm spoiled by TWST, but I miss character pulls focusing on characters. But even with games like FGO in mind, I got better characters each pull in that game even with their criticized draw rates.

Overall

If you want a story with interesting characters, magic, and demons, I say go for it. If you don't like resource gathering games and easily get turned off mobile games by the grind, skip this one.

There's other aspects in this review I didn't go over, like the guild cats, arena, team boss battles, etc., but if all the above is too much, I'm not going to add on to the reading even further.

[lambergeier]

2022 book post FINALLY

this post is six weeks late because, frankly, i was on my honeymoon over new years and its hard to get up the will to type all this shit when everyone has already posted their book lists ages ago!! but also i read a lot of good books last year and wish to gloat, so here we are. italics are rereads, bold are my favorites, asterisks denote not-prose, and reviews are interspersed throughout as i felt like it:

January

No One is Talking About This - Patricia Lockwood (this book made me cry so hard lmao. first part is a sickeningly true-to-life depiction of Being A Blue Check Person and then the second part makes you cry so bad.)

Sorrowland - Rivers Solomon (what the fuck happened to the last third of this book? what shit-ass x-men knock-off did it come from?)

What Soldiers Do: Sex and the American GI in World War II France - Mary Louise Roberts (got on a whole ww2 history kick because, gotta be real, i watched all of band of brothers during winter break 2021-2022 and developed a bug up my ass. pulled this off the shelf at the library on a whim and it was STUNNING. excellently, thoroughly told history of sex, venereal disease, and race among american GIs in normany following the invasion. would read anything roberts now.)

How to Blow Up a Pipeline - Andreas Malm

Hello, Sailor: The hidden history of gay life at sea - Paul Baker and Jo Stanley

Coming Out Under Fire: The History of Gay Men and Women in World War II - Allan Berube (another excellent ww2 book, frequently quoted on this site and for good reason. not written by a historian, so incredibly easy and engaging to read, that presents you with just this amazing overview of how modern american queer identity was totally, inextricably shaped by the us military and the experience of being part of it or even just near it lmao)

February

Possession - A.S. Byatt (really really lovely romance that was such a consistent pleasure to read that i got to the end basically unable to remember favorite lines or even scenes i was just like mmmmmmmm. book good.)

Uncanny Valley - Anna Wiener

Howl’s Moving Castle - Diana Wynne Jones

The Verge: Reformation, Renaissance, and Forty Years that Shook the World - Patrick Wyman (this book sucked ass we gotta stop giving podcasters history books)

Watership Down - Richard Adams (so fucked up. loved this. love that we give this to children to read.)

Dead Collections - Isaac Fellman

March

The Hidden Palace - Helene Wecker (much better than its prequel, imho! resolved many pacing issues but lost no heart!)

The Vanishing Half - Britt Bennet (part of the reason i managed to read so much this year is that i had to drive a lot for work and started putting audiobooks on in the car, having never been an audiobook person before. i listened almost entirely to contemporary litfic this way, a genre i also had not previously engage with, and this was both a fascinating entry into an entire other world of books and also kinda boring sometimes lmao. vanishing half was good, certainly better than some of the other stuff i ended up listening to, but still not something i would have finished if i weren't in the car)

The Reformation - Patrick Collinson (this bitch was so funny his preface to the book was 'i didn't list any sources because i've been teaching this topic for 60 years. the source is Me.' anyways almost totally unreadable but did provide me some good context on the counter-reformation, which i want to learn more about.)

Fleischman is in Trouble - Taffy Brodesser-Akner

Home Baked - Alia Volz (soooooo good all bay area homies please read this)

River of Stars - Vanessa Hua

April

Light from Uncommon Stars - Ryka Aoki (INSANE BOOK. SO FUN.)

*Death of a Salesman - Arthur Miller

Book of Dust - Phillip Pullman

Gold Diggers - Sanjena Sathian

*Angels in America - Tony Kushner (disconnected me from reality for like 24 straight hours. scared to reread it.)

Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen (read this in high school and hated it because i was a DUMB TEENAGER!! THIS BOOK IS SO FUNNY!!)

Good Omens - Terry Pratchett

Fifth Elephant - Terry Pratchett

May

Mexican Gothic - Silvia Moreno-Garcia (strongly eh.)

Oh the Glory of it All - Sean Wilsey (loved it but feels impossible to recommend.)

Magic for Liars - Sarah Gailey

Foundation - Isaac Asimov (absolutely fascinating as like, a history of the genre thing, even if i only "enjoyed" reading the first two or three stories lol. also, HE COULDN'T PREDICT FIAT CURRENCY?? ACTUAL PLOT POINT THAT THERE AREN'T ENOUGH METALS ON THE PLANET TO MINT COINS???? reader i lost my mind.)

June

All the Pretty Horses - Cormac McCarthy (all the pretty horses my insane high school problematic fave. i will never read the sequels)

Have His Carcase - Dorothy L. Sayers

The Power - Naomi Alderman (as i said on private twitter after rereading, this book makes me sick to my stomach not because of the gender shit, which is like, i know what the book's about that's what it's about it's not gonna be a different book, but christ it's so bleak. love an oral history style but i gave my copy away once i finished lmao.)

Murder Must Advertise - Dorothy L. Sayers

July

Such a Fun Age - Kiley Reid (great audiobook narrator, and a very funny book)

Several People are Typing - Calvin Kasulke (PLEASE LISTEN TO THIS AUDIOBOOK THEY HIRED A FULL RADIO-PLAY STYLE CAST AND SURE THE ACTUAL STORY DOESN'T STICK THE LANDING BUT IT'S SO FUNNY. i finished it on my own and immediately put it back on for emma to enjoy. so good.)

They Were Her Property: White Women as Slave Owners in the American South - Stephanie Jones-Rogers

Hawk Mountain - Conner Habib (oughhhhouguhughuhghh the dread. great book. wretched creeping horror. queer, if that matters. gives you the Dread.)

There, There - Tommy Orange

August

If an Egyptian Can’t Speak English - Noor Naga (experimental fiction, i listened to it on audiobook and actually missed a lot of what it was doing in print but still incredibly good. absolute sucker punch of an ending.)

The Loneliest Americans - Jay Caspian King

Encounters at the Heart of the World: A History of the Mandan People - Elizabeth Fenn (great clear thorough history of the mandan nation of the upper missouri river, really enjoyed this.)

An Immense World: How Animal Senses Reveal the Hidden Realms Around Us - Ed Yong (ed yong is the best science writer working today and this book was tremendous. i quoted like every other line of it to emma and she still went and borrowed it as soon as i was done. we immediately bought a copy for the house.)

Sheer Misery: Soldiers in Battle in WWII - Mary Louise Roberts

September

Black Sun - Rebecca Roanhorse (damn so much modern sff is bad)

I Contain Multitudes: The Microbes Within Us and a Grander View of Life - Ed Yong (not as good as the animal book but still VERY good)

Dark Rise - C.S. Pacat (unfuckingreadable. a masterclass of incoherent bullshit)

Nona the Ninth - taz lol (this should not have been its own book.)

*Ducks - Kate Beaton (cannot recommend highly enough. intense subject matter, also made me cry many times, but holy shit ms beaton you killed it with this one)

Unreleased Friend Book that I Love So Bad (soon!!)

Normal People - Sally Rooney

October

Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger (another book i haven't reread since high school holden ilu. you are my little problems boy)

Pachinko - Min Jin Lee (read it all in one day while on various airplanes. what a BOOK)

Half of a Yellow Sun - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Foundation - Mercedes Lackey (thus begins the valdemar stage of the year)

My Year of Rest and Relaxation - Ottessa Moshfegh (uh. would not recommend.)

November

Devil House - John Darnielle (ur crazy for this one mr mountain goats. still don't know if it was good or bad lol.)

Arrows of the Queen - Mercedes Lackey

Arrows Flight - Mercedes Lackey

Arrows Fall - Mercedes Lackey

Magic’s Pawn - Mercedes Lackey (vanyel i love you)

December

Magic’s Promise - Mercedes Lackey (vanyel i'm obsessed with you)

Empire of Wild - Cherie Dimaline

Magic’s Price - Mercedes Lackey (oh misty we did NOT stick the landing here. rip to vanyel.)

Winter Counts - David Heska Wanbli Weiden

Neuromancer - William Gibson (loved so many individual sentences and, like foundation, a very interesting work for understanding the history of the genre. however in many ways, totally incomprehensible.)

total books: 66!!! nice work, me! really enjoyed how much i read in 2022 and how generally varied it was and after a long while of not reading too much at all, it's been very nice being back in the swing of it. also god non-fiction is so good. i can't read it particularly fast but every time i read a good one i enjoy it so immensely. look forward to reading more of it this year!!!

AND, FINALLY, A SHOUT OUT TO THE WORST DNF OF 2022:

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V.E. Schwab sucks shit.

[cherthegoddess]

Sneak Peek of His Sunshine

Heyyy guys! Here's a quick sneak peek of something I've been working on called His Sunshine, a Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader. It's definitely a Grumpy x Sunshine fic and I've been having dreams about this story! I'm excited for everyone to read it so please enjoy! Oh! And same warnings as my other stories, this is written with a black reader in mind but anyone can read it!

His Sunshine

Bucky was already exhausted from the day and it was barely 11. He did his early morning run with Steve and Sam. He tried to avoid Tony to the best of his ability. Got unfortunately caught, with that one Parker kid. And now some alien losers decided that today was a fantastic day to try to invade the Earth for whatever reason. He just wanted to go back to his bed, read some books, and be away from all people, but luck was not on his side. He dodged the punches being thrown his way landing a few with his metal one. There just seemed to be too many. He watched as Steve killed one with a few more coming behind him. Bucky ran to help him swiftly getting away from the debris of the battle. He pulled a gun out of his holster when he knew he wasn’t going to get there in time, killing two and alarming Steve of their presence. He fought back-to-back with Steve. This battle wouldn’t be over for hours. Every time they killed one another popped up and every Avenger they could gather was there. 

Not long after the brush of defeat was starting to come into the air, a few of the aliens were screaming in pain from suddenly being lit on fire, others having branches growing out of their noses. The UFO that was in the air was being broken down piece by piece. The Avengers searched for their unknown hero. “Heyy guys sorry I’m late” Their heads quickly turned to the sky looking at the woman in the air wearing all blue, her identity hidden with a mask. The woman salutes before finishing off the rest of the aliens with bursts of fire, winds, and poor plants that have seen the back and front ends of the aliens. Bucky watched in awe with the others at her speed and effectiveness, all while not even lifting a finger. The others gathered in a small huddle and the woman began to finally hit the ground in front of them. “Whew! Those aliens were really something huh?” Their eyes train behind her as the city begins to rebuild itself. The woman looks behind her to see what they are staring at. “How in the…” She laughs. Waving her hand. “Oh, that’s me! Just doing a little cleanup!” Bucky looks at Steve confused, Steve shrugs his shoulders in response before stepping up. “Ma’am, who are you and where did you come from?” The woman grins. “Oh, my god. The Captain America is talking to me! Sorry, who am I, was your first question right? I’m Y/n. I don’t exactly have a cool superhero name yet. I didn’t realize how hard it would be to pick one, especially with two powers, you gotta honor both. Sorry, I’m rambling! Second question, I’m from Harlem born and bred. I was actually building up the courage to come to tell you guys about me and hopefully become an Avenger, but then you know aliens! Now I’m here!” The woman, who long-windedly, explained her name to be Y/n finally finished with a proud grin on her face. “Okay, Scrappy doo, how did you do all of this?” Tony motions to the buildings that were freshly repaired. “I would love to explain, but repairing buildings and fighting aliens is kind of a draining task, is it possible we could go to the tower? I can explain everything there especially if you want to test me to see all the cool things I can do as well?” They eyed each other, Bucky more weary of Y/n. She was too… nice. Too happy even after being in the face of danger. And even more worrisome, she was powerful. “Fine kid but you have to stay by Barnes’ side until we get there, we don’t trust you quite yet,” Bucky’s eyes shoot to Tony glaring harshly even after Steve places a hand on him so he doesn’t say anything. Y/n’s eyes for the first time since her appearance, meet his., she grins and waves, making her way over to him. He rolls his eyes.  Tony tells F.R.I.D.A.Y to send a quadjet. 

[starryjeekies]

Hi sweetie. May I request OT8 kinks for stray kids? Ty💙

a/n: hi. oops. i've been gone for quite some time. long story short I didn't have access to my medication for about 2 months and it didn't help my mental state at all. now I am back on them and will be starting off small with writing some blurbs and trying to finish my asks that I can actually create ideas for. this one is one that'll be easier for me to complete as I come back into the writing scene!

Bang Chan:

Cockwarming {receiving}

Orgasm Control {giving}

Praise {giving/receiving}

Chan was so easy to pick out some kinks for. I don't doubt this man loves cockwarming but in an "innocent" way. Like most people don't get it until you do it, but sometimes feeling full with your lover's dick inside you is comforting as hell and he would definitely offer it up for the first time before you start asking for it. The orgasm control would definitely come as a way for you to get the most pleasure out of your intimacy, him whispering, "Not yet, you can hold out a little longer, yeah?" and MAN would he dote on you while drilling you. He also loves it when you tell him how good he's making you feel, it'll probably make him fuck you harder if anything. STROKE HIS EGO CUZ HE WON'T!

Lee Know:

Thigh Riding {receiving}

Cuckolding

Edging {giving}

hhhhhhhhhh okay i have so many issues cuz it was hard to just narrow down three for him. This m a n has the prettiest thighs ever, he's got a lot of muscle. I don't doubt he would make you ride his thigh before you can ride his cock. And the cuckolding is definitely influenced by my Double Trouble fic, like he'd be so smug watching you get fucked by someone else, relishing in the new view he gets to see. Wouldn't be too often as it's gotta be someone you're both comfortable with but once you've found someone, phew. And Lino is a little shit so he would definitely edge you until you are sobbing with the whole purpose is to fuck you dumb.

Changbin:

Impact Play {giving}

Breath Play {giving}

Manhandling {giving}

This man is a dom. I take no criticism. I have no doubt in my mind that he loves to spank you, in the bedroom and outside. Outside the bedroom would be flirty, but inside the bedroom he aims to make marks. He also definitely has a kink with his strength/power so hence why breath play is on there. Obvi it would be with your consent and he wouldn't aim to hurt you by any means with it, just wanting control. And the manhandling i MEAN he would throw you over his shoulder, fuck you against a wall, bend you like a pretzel simply because he can and he wants to show you he can. He's gonna talk to you super sweetly while he handles you like a ragdoll.

Hyunjin:

Shibari/Bondage {giving/receiving}

Blindfolds {giving/receiving}

Exhibitionism

See I get like. super switch vibes from him. but still sub leaning so this was kinda hard. Shibari/Bondage is a no brainer though because if you're tied up, he would love to sketch you. In fact he would probably have a sketch book dedicated to the different patterns. If he's tied up then he would definitely be the perfect pillow prince. Blindfolds would be fun either way because of the anticipation; the thrill of not knowing what the other could do with a feather, a flogger, fingers, u g h. And I don't doubt that this man is secretly into showing off for others. If he moans too loudly in the dorms or someone sees you two sneak away in the company building, he likes to be risky and wouldn't honestly mind if he did get caught since he's already in the mood.

Han:

Corruption {receiving}

Breeding/Creampie {giving}

Roleplay {giving/receiving}

Here is where things started to get harder (haha puns). So I don't think Han is 100% sub by any means. Just inexperienced. If you take the ropes to show him the world of kinks and bdsm and sex, I think he would let you take the reigns. He would be down to try many things, even if he would be shy, but I guarantee 6 months down the line he will be just as kinky as you are. One of his favorite things he discovers is a breeding kink. The one thing he loves to mark you with is his cum. He's messy and will drool watching it pour out of your holes. Also to have a little fun would be roleplay! I think it would take him a minute to be serious and into the role but as we see in the SKZ shenanigans, he's a born actor.

Felix:

Cock Ring

Auralism {giving/receiving}

Toys {giving/receiving}

Tiny Felix. He looks so precious and cute and you just wanna pinch his freckled cheeks. I don't think he's not kinky, his are just a little more muted. For example, having the cock ring on for you when you ask him to so you can have a beautiful dick to ride or will put it on right before date night so he can dick you down into pleasure. He also probably has a think for your voice. Your moans, your praises, gasps, he will drink up everything. You can expect him to have really pretty moans and grunts too, deep grunts when he's dom and sweet moans when he's sub. Also, I expect him to have a plethora of toys to your disposal to use for yourself and him. Once a month, you two go shopping for a new on to try out on the next date night.

Seungmin:

Dacryphilia

Temperature Play {giving}

Humiliation {giving}

He's a huge brat. Huge tease. He is ready to push every and all buttons that you have. If you got 3 rounds and you're oversensitive, squirming, getting fucked dumb, and you start to cry from it being so good? You get that's going to drive him over the edge to his first orgasm of the night cuz this boy has wicked stamina. I think he would be a little bit more vanilla BUT one thing he likes to use is either wax or an ice cube. Dripping hot wax on your chest, seeing how it rises and falls with the heat, or the way you shiver when he drags an ice cube down your tummy. Oh and don't even get me started on the humiliation part of it. He's a tease, we know this. However I don't think the humiliation comes in until you're being close to fucked dumb, swallowing his cock, legs shaking from the orgasms you've had, he'll hit you with a "pretty little whore" and it's all over.

I.N:

Somnophilia {giving/receiving}

Pet Play {receiving}

Voyerism

Consent. Is. Key. So Jeongin would definitely ask for your permission to fuck you slowly and deeply while you slept. He would love to see your peaceful face twist up in pleasure, your dreams turning naughty. And he would encourage you to do the same, to use his cock for your own pleasure while he's sound asleep. The pet play, though, is something he saw on the internet once, suggested you try it, and he immediately fell for it. Seeing you with the cute ear and collar sets that he'll buy you every couple of months to see a new color on you, you being a good little baby and listening to him like a good pet should, makes him weak in the knees. Especially while you're in your pet gear, he loves to watch you. He wants you to play with yourself just for him and his eyes only. He doesn't like to share what's his (affectionately of course).

[hyacinthoideshispanica]

An idea for a Gwynriel college/fake-dating au

Azriel's mother is visiting him at college for the first time, and he wants her to think he's a responsible adult who knows how to cook real, healthy food. Not just ordering pizza and reheating takeout. So he goes to the library to check out some cookbooks, and Gwyn, who works there, helps him out.

Azriel, carrying a stack of at least 15 different cookbooks to the checkout station: I'll take all of these, please.

Gwyn: Ummm....wow. Alright then, if you don't mind me asking, why so many cookbooks? Are you majoring in culinary arts?

Azriel: Not even close, I'm just cooking dinner for my Mom tonight.

Gwyn: Are you making her a 15-course meal with one recipe from each book?

Azriel:... It's too much, huh?

Gwyn: Definitely. Maybe I can help you. What kinds of food does your mom like?

Azriel: She's not very picky, but we tended to eat more simple stuff when I was growing up.

Gwyn: Ok. Well, if you're going for simple, I think we can take out the fancy French cookbooks...

Eventually, they narrow it down to three, and as he's walking away, looking through the recipes, Azriel realizes he has almost none of the ingredients for any of them at home, and he has to go grocery shopping.

Gwyn materializes at his side and hands him a paper and pen.

Gwyn: My shift ends in twenty minutes. Why don't you write out everything you need for tonight, and I'll help you grab it at the store. That way, you'll have plenty of time to get home and cook.

25 minutes later, Azriel is in his car, following Gwyn's little teal blue car with a pegasus decal on the back to the grocery store in town. Azriel had been there before, during the first week of classes, but as time went on, he just found it easier to order takeout, grab stuff from the campus cafeteria, or stop by the small convenience store by his apartment for food instead of going 30 minutes into town.

He parks next to Gwyn, and she's already out of her car, leaning against the hood, waiting for him.

Gwyn: By the way, we never really introduced ourselves. I'm Gwyn.

Azriel introduces himself, and they go into the store and start hunting through the aisles.

Azriel notices Gwyn grab some tea and a few packs of cookies.

Azriel: Those aren't on the list.

Gwyn: Oh, these are for me. You're not the only one who needed to come here today. But you should probably grab some extra stuff, too. After all, don't you want your mom to think you regularly shop? You gotta make it look realistic.

Gwyn tosses a few large bags of chips and a case of beer into the cart to make her point, and Azriel follows through, adding some of his favorite protein shakes and a pack of pudding cups to the cart.

Gwyn: So, I've seen you around campus a few times, but ever really in the library. What's your major?

Azriel: (I can't think of anything), yours?

Gwyn: Norse Mythology. I'm fascinated by the Valkyries.

They talk a little more as they load their bags into their cars, and Azriel gets a text from his mom saying that her flight is actually landing sooner than expected, and she'll be there in a few hours. Azriel panics because he won't have time to finish cooking everything, and again, Gwyn offers to help so things go faster.

They get back to his apartment and start cooking. Azriel prepares a salad while Gwyn makes a quick batch of dinner rolls from scratch. They put the chicken, covered in lemon and herbs, in the oven to roast. And then make some brownies for dessert.

Azriel profusely thanks Gwyn for her help, saying he owes her big time and she shrugs it off, saying she'll gladly accept some leftover brownies as payment, and Azriel promises to bring her some tomorrow. Then, when he opens the door of his apartment to walk her out, they run directly into his mother.

Azriel's mother sees Gwyn and assumes she is her son's girlfriend and immediately invites her to stay and eat with them. Gwyn awkwardly accepts, and an even more awkward dinner ensues.

Azriel's mother: So, how did you meet?

Gwyn: Well, I'd seen him around campus a bit, but we didn't officially meet until he came into the library where I work.

Azriel: I needed some books but didn't really know what I was looking for. She was a big help.

Azriel can't help smiling at Gwyn appreciatively, and she blushes a little while smiling back. Azriel's mother sees and makes a comment about how Azriel never mentioned a girlfriend before, and Gwyn covers for him by explaining that they only made things official recently and she wasn't expecting to meet his mother so soon.

Azriel's mother ends up visiting for, like, a month and the entire time, Azriel and Gwyn fully commit to a fake-dating trope, and of course, real feelings develop.

Bonus idea: This happens freshman year, and the next year, when his mother gets ready to visit again, she says she can't wait to see Gwyn again.

After their month of fake dating last year, Azriel and Gwyn do still talk and hang out sometimes. They even have a class together this semester. So one day, he asks her if she's willing to pretend again. She agrees, she really liked his mom and she knows he'll pay her in brownies.

And so, at least once a year, they fully commit to pretending to be a couple, and during her visit during senior year, she pulls Azriel aside and asks when he's planning to propose.

It's at this point that Azriel realizes just how badly he's fallen for Gwyn over the years, but he thinks she sees him as just a friend (she doesn't). So, one day, he's talking to Gwyn and suggests they "break up," and to his surprise, Gwyn seems very upset by this. He tries to smooth things over by making a joke about how he'll still make her brownies, and that just makes things worse. Gwyn stalks off and ignores Azriel's attempts to talk to her. A few days go by, and Nesta and Emerie, Gwyn's best friends, show up at Azriel's doorstep and scold him for toying with Gwyn's heart for years because he was too much of a coward to tell his mother the truth.

What neither woman realizes is that Azriel's mother is in the next room and can hear every word. She comes out and asks Azriel what they're talking about, and after the girls leave, he sits down and tells his mom the truth. That Gwyn was never his girlfriend. He met her the same day she did, and he just wanted her to think that he was doing fine on his own, so he got Gwyn to pretend for him. But he actually has feelings for her now, but she doesn't feel the same.

Azriel's mom tells him, affectionately, that he's an idiot. Gwyn clearly has feelings for him and encourages him to go fix things with her.

As always, I don't have the talent to write an actual fic, so this prompt is up for grabs.

[gayweedanimal]

Since I gotta be up for work in like 3 hours and can't sleep I might as well talk new years resolutions. Here's mine:

Long ass post so I'm readmore

Read every day: I've been collecting books for a while now and have a huge backlog of super interesting stuff to read. The only thing holding me back is making time to do it.

Write every day: Similarly, I have too many half baked projects/ideas that I need to actually finish. The perfectionist in me has been keeping me from finishing things for years, and for what? Fear of putting out something bad? Some of my favorite things in the world are bad. I already put out bad art all the time, and I love it. I've been struggling with this part of myself for far too long and it's time for it to die.

Organize my information better: I'm a notorious note-taker, but they're always very disjointed and arcane. So I guess that means I'm a bad note-taker. I've been using Obsidian more and more over the last few months and been building better information collection habits to use it to its full potential. Sometimes the first step is just to accept that your memory is shitty and learn to efficiently externalize things. Building off of that...

Manage my time better: I have so much shit going on at any one time it's often overwhelming. ADHD and my various neuroses certainly don't help. I've been doing various things to work on this but I need to stick to them better.

Finish Somnium: I put out a whole one (1) episode last year because I dreamt too big with my episode plans and didn't have the tools to bring them to fruition the way I wanted to - I need to push myself to actually finish more. This year's goal is manageable - 4 episodes.

Learn Japanese: I just think it's a neat language. Maybe one day I'll visit Japan; there's so much I want to see there. I know that seems like a far flung dream right now, but life happens fast.

Work out more: not much to say here, I just need to keep up this habit and push myself harder to build strength.

Get my driver's license: I've almost always lived in areas where I've just never needed to drive, but now that my sister has her's I feel like it's finally time to check this box lol.

Make more money: it's getting harder and harder to keep things afloat (as I'm sure is news to absolutely nobody) even with my pretty decent full time job. I'm assuming I won't get a raise, and also hoping I won't get laid off, but even still I need to get some sort of consistent side hustle doing web design or something similar.

God this really seems like a lot when I write them all down... I'm going to stick to them though. I probably won't kick all of these off at once just to not burn myself out, but I'm gonna do them all.

I really can't live without being able to set goals and make progress on them anymore, even if the progress is slow, even if things slide backwards or I fall off for months or years. I lived with soul crushing suicidal depression for so long and it really made it difficult to believe that my life was worth living or that it was worth investing in my skills or my future. I know a lot of people still think that way and I'm not the best at helping them, and that what worked for me doesn't work for everyone. But seasons change, wounds heal, and in the end, it's always worth it to invest your time in bettering yourself and to keep moving ahead.

Man, I don't know where the fuck I was going with all that but I'm leaving it in. Also why the hell am I writing this long ass post... I barely post here anymore. Anyway fuck it I'm gonna try to sleep AGAIN wish me luck at work in... 2 and a half hours. Happy new year ya filthy animals.

[fizzingwizard]

something I hear Sims Youtubers say sometimes which is 100% so untrue for me:

"the Sims gets boring because you use cheats to give them money and keep their needs high. you remove the challenge when you cheat these things away and that's why you're bored"

totally my personal opinion but for me it is the exact opposite. Having to constantly worry about money in the game is what's boring. Going to a rabbit hole job, or an active career full of repetitive, meaningless tasks in order to be able to make garden salad for dinner is boring. Not having the funds to buy gameplay objects is boring, because I like variety, not watching my Sim "read a random book" for the fifteenth time today.

Sims becoming Uncomfortable every two minutes because of how fast their needs drain makes me feel like a bad parent, lol, which I know is unreasonable but it's true! I don't enjoy grumpy sims. I like them to be any other emotion than Uncomfortable. "it's part of the challenge" but it's NOT challenging - the fixes for this is usually very very simple, just eat some food! - i mean realistic but still frustrating.

It's also that... like, avoiding cheats does NOT make the game more challenging if you have even a vague sense of what to do. Because if your sim is in the wrong emotional state, all you gotta do is light some incense. Sick? Drink some green tea, no need to go to the doctor. So many of the "challenges" in the game are alleviated almost as easily without cheats as with. On top of that, they don't even feel like challenges! Again, they're mostly small, repetitive, and meaningless. There's no sense of accomplishment because I made sure my sim got to the toilet before they peed on themself. Besides, they'll surely almost wet themself again soon. (And if I happen to be in a public venue where people are constantly talking and my sim can't extricate themself from the "chat" queue in a timely manner, even my best efforts won't save their underwear! Hmm, you know what works in that scenario? TELEPORT CHEAT.)

I have tried playing rags to riches with no cheats. I didn't quit because it was too hard. (I play on long life span, aka easy mode lol!) I quit because I was BORED TO TEARS. The minute I made my sims millionaires and bought them every skill-building activity there is, I was having a lot more fun, because watching nonexistent simulated people go to sleep, use the bathroom, eat, go to work, complain about low needs, go to sleep, use the bathroom, eat, go to work OVER and OVER and OVER again is NOT FUN. I've watched rags to riches let's plays where after "beating" the challenge, the player just continued playing as a rich sim! Like they didn't suddenly get bored and go "gee I wanna be poor again, let's donate everything to charity and start over."

So yeah I have no doubt some people love rags to riches and maybe there really are some players who eschew cheats no matter what. But that is noooot going to cut it for me, not ever. Not with this game. The one thing that makes Sims 4 still playable for me is variety and that's why I don't want packs like Lovestruck, which, come on guys, it's just new dressing to gameplay that already exists. I like packs that actually bring new activities and new goals and skills. I like packs (rare as they are) that expand on existing activities, like when Island Living gave us new fish to catch and the ability to build on waterfront lots (which is STILL stupidly restricted to Sulani, WHY). I like the silliness of Cottage Living's obsidian chicken. I like watching my sims wipeout on the snowboard. And climbing Mt Komorebi, while IMO actually not challenging enough (because I beat it at level 5/6 - without cheats I should mention - when the max is 10 but there's no greater challenge from there so I haven't been motivated to finish building the skill).

I do NOT like rabbit holes or endlessly grumpy sims or ugly houses or repetitive gameplay. My sims are always traveling and always doing something new. I literally gave my sims family infinite money just so I could move them to a different lot every other week and build them a new house so I'll have something new to look at. (btw I used to struggle because I'd set these lots as generic, since you can't own multiple homes, but then they would be invaded by townies... I've since learned that if you set your McMansion to "national park," no one will bother you at all bahahahaha!)

yeah anyway. Sims 4 play styles are as diverse as humans. I don't envy the Sims team the job of trying to engage as many of us as possible lol. But I do think, for me at least, it's relatively simple: 1) add something new, 2) let it look good (gawd those fugly eyelashes!), 3) let it FUNCTION PROPERLY. don't make it too complicated okay. Don't make, for example, a Finchwick fair in which only one guy besides my sim will participate, and somehow his "normal" quality apple pie wins over my "excellent" quality one lol. Multiple times I might add x'D (But also don't make a mountain that can be successfully summited at level 5 but the rock climbing skill has 10 levels)