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stsgluver · 4 months

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𝐒𝐍𝐀𝐏𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐓 𝐏𝐓.𝟒 — gojo satoru

synopsis. nobara can’t find the dvd anywhere and gojo has a decision to make

wc. 4k

tags. fluff, angst (kinda), reader is described as fem, possibly ooc gojo (my bad), cliffhanger-ish, any spelling mistakes blame on my cats, possible plotholes

a/n. several things to address: firstly my description of dvds and how they work ARE SO FLAWED IK DON'T JUDGE. secondly, look I get how rct works so not everything I say is accurate but like this is also about 2d men so who's to judge. finally I'm not too sure about this chapter so if its shit lmk BUT I HOPE YOU ALL LOVE IT THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT <333 ily all but I do have upcoming exams so the ending(s), won't be posted till possibly early February as I have to get back to studying :(

previous part / final part / series masterlist

“guys we’ve lost it.” nobara pushed up her mattress, phone pressed between her ear and her shoulder as she peered beneath the wooden slats. all there was was her suitcase and a bag from an expensive shop she’d convinced gojo to buy for her. “it’s gone. poof. here once and now it’s not.” the ‘it’ in question being the dvd they’d treasured for the last few weeks (well, yuuji and nobara anyways).

after gojo had taken the dvd – unbeknownst to the first years – nobara had ended up sleeping for the next fourty eight hours, and then afterwards spending several days catching up on the classwork she’d missed. she hadn’t had the time or energy to force her classmates into another movie night so now here they were, almost a week since it was last touched, finally realising its disappearance.

“do you want me and megumi to come help?” yuuji asked tentatively as he heard her curse as she dropped the mattress back down. nobara sighed, glancing around at the chaos she’d created. her room was a mess – drawers half open and half her clothes and books on the floor in case the dvd had slipped into a pile by accident.

“it’s not in my room,” she said adamantly, pushing her hair back from her face in frustration as she struggled to piece together the final moments she had with the dvd. she could remember sending megumi away, beginning her little day of research and even some of the videos she watched (the arcade and the christmas reunion), but then she fell asleep and everything was hazy from there.

“when was the last time you had it?” megumi asked and nobara felt her eye twitch like she hadn't retraced her steps a million times already.

“the first day i was off sick. i was watching a few–”

“without us?” the pink haired sorcerer cut in with a gasp.

“what else was there to do?” nobara argued back with no bite but he quietened down nonetheless.

a moment of silence settled between the three as each tried to figure out where it could have been misplaced or who could’ve accidentally picked it up. if nobara had dropped it somewhere outside of her dorm, could one of the older years taken it?

nobara was brought out of deep thought by yuuji flippantly asking: “did you watch any after sensei came to see you?” she froze at the implication of his words. at no point could she recall their teacher ever coming in to check on her – it had always been either yuuji, megumi or maki.

“what?”

several hours later, the three first years found themselves huddled on the benches, nobara in the middle and the boys either side of her. in front of them were the second years and gojo – the latter having said something to annoy maki as yuuta held her back from making a swing at their laughing teacher. the second year teacher was off ill today so the larger class meant that the three had a distraction as they tried to figure out what their next step was – if they even had one at this point.

the assumed facts were as such: the first years were no longer in possession of the dvd, and gojo had it. though there was little doubt that this was true, it didn’t stop them questioning the possibility – after all, megumi had pointed out, there’d been no alter in his behaviour whatsoever since the minute he’d checked on nobara. surely, even the strongest would be noticeably affected by a disk that immortalised a happiness and innocence he’d never be able to return to.

but then again, maybe this was just another thing that separated gojo from the rest of society. being the strongest came before all else, he didn’t have the time to mourn resurfaced memories.

“maybe he just doesn’t have it,” yuuji suggested.

“he has to,” nobara reaffirmed. at this point they’d exhausted all other options about where it could possibly be and surely they would have heard if one of the older years found what they had. “would he tell you if he had it?” she asked megumi.

“no,” megumi said quickly, shaking his head and leaning back on the bench as he looked over at gojo, “we… he wouldn’t talk to me about that. about them.”

“could we steal it back?” yuuji offered and nobara debated duct taping his mouth closed.

megumi scoffed, shaking his head, “he has six eyes. even if we tried, he’d know for sure it was us.”

“he already knows it was us,” nobara countered, not that she agreed with yuuji’s solution by any means. “which is why i don’t get why he hasn’t said anyth–”

“oi, you three!” the first years jumped apart from their circle, hearts pounding as gojo appeared before them with a smirk toying at the corner of his lips and his hands clasped behind his back. “whoever beats maki in hand to hand combat gets the day off tomorrow!”

“yuuji if you win, i’m taking your day off,” nobara called out as she trailed behind the aforementioned boy running to the centre of the field.

“okay!”

unsurprisingly, all three first years lost against the second year. megumi came closest to winning but when he tried to use his cursed technique, gojo countered it, catching him off guard and giving maki the opportunity to sweep him off his feet with her staff.

gojo found himself still laughing over megumi’s shocked expression as he fell flat on his back as he stepped past the threshold of his office. even after all he’d taught the boy in combat, with no cursed technique it was hard to overcome the zenin girl’s strength and skill she’d mastered to take on her own clan.

he let out a small sigh as the door locked shut and, for the first time that day, he was alone with his own thoughts.

dropping down into his office chair, gojo crossed one leg over the other as he pulled open a drawer. on the top of a pile of unread paperwork for the higher ups was the dvd the first years were so fixated on.

he wasn’t stupid; he knew eventually they would figure out he had it and, unlike himself, they’d been way less subtle once they’d put two and two together. yuuji’s speech had tripled in speed, nobara was way too keen on being anywhere but where he was and megumi… gojo couldn’t forget the guilt and hurt in the teenage boy’s eyes after telling him you were gone. it was here again, had been for several weeks, and it was only after stumbling upon the disk in nobara’s room that he’d understood why.

gojo gritted his teeth together as he held the disk up between shaky fingers. it was pathetic, he scolded himself, it was just a bit of plastic with memories lasered into divots in a never ending spiral. it wasn’t worth the heartache.

if he looked closely enough, he could see shoko’s name written on the centrepiece in faded black sharpie. after gojo had stumbled upon the old camera several years after graduating from jujutsu high, shoko had taken back the camera to transfer all of the old clips onto dvds and given him, herself, nanami and you your own copies. he couldn’t even remember where his and yours were anymore, in fact he’d pretty much forgotten about their existence until a week ago.

he wasn’t sure where shoko had lost the dvd for the first years to get their hands on it but he hadn’t worked up the courage to speak to her about it. he hadn’t worked up the courage to do anything more than just spin the disk between his fingers, cry about it for a bit, and go back to pretending he didn’t have the last remnants of his youth in his drawer.

gojo glanced between the disk and the laptop on his desk. it was the last step he needed to take to hear your voice again. it had been on repeat for the last week in his mind; you uttering his name and that innocent question, would you last beyond your teenage years?

he missed it, missed you so bad.

raising megumi was a lot harder without you there; you were his favourite after all, bridging the gap between the two when they bumped heads with their contrasting personalities. gojo was all rainbows and giggles and megumi was everything but. you were a happy medium, creating a balance that maintained order in the home you shared. it was a peace that megumi deserved after losing his parents.

gojo clicked his tongue, reaching across to press a button that opened up a space for the disk. slotting it in place, he clicked the device shut and held his breath as he waited. it took several seconds for the files to load and then there he was again, back in those fields under the large weeping willow that was your spot.

the video was paused, exactly where it had been left, except this time gojo could actually see the screen.

your face wasn’t in it, just his. his glasses were off – balanced on your head if he remembered correctly – as he used your lap as a pillow. one of your hands was holding the camera while the other was held over his eyes to block any sort of light. the only thing he could make out was your cursed energy.

you were nearing the end of your first year and whilst gojo was growing more powerful, he was also growing more and more reliant on his glasses to stop himself from becoming so overwhelmed with the constant information he received with his six eyes. he’d overworked himself that day, as he so often did, hence why you’d dragged him away from the school to the seclusion of the tree.

your questions about the longevity of your relationship weren’t meant to hold deep meaning, you just wanted to take his mind off of the headaches. gojo would choose thinking about you over the searing pain in the back of his head any day. yaga said that once he had a better understanding of his reversed curse technique it wouldn’t be so bad but until then it was just about riding it out.

gojo snorted at the notion. his reversed curse technique only marginally helped. you were what got him through the days when he’d lock himself in his bedroom with blackout blinds pulled down, hiding under his covers till he felt like he could function in society again.

he didn’t unpause the video, however, instead clicking onto the main tab with all of the files stored.

lifting up his blindfold and dropping it down onto the desk, gojo took a deep breath before he began scrolling. unlike when the first years were simply searching for the ones with their favourite thumbnail, gojo was specifically searching for the ones he knew focused on you.

he needed to hear your voice again, to play it on repeat until it became so ingrained into his skin he could feel your touch.

gojo halted the cursor over the familiar date of your birthday, clicking on it without a second thought as the video filled the screen. it buffered for a moment, giving him a view of the dorm he’d practically spent three years in (despite yaga’s constant complaints and reminders that dorms were segregated on gender).

in the corner of your room was a stack of plushies that he’d won for you at arcades, and your walls were covered in photobooth photos and polaroids of your group of friends. his personal favourite was the polaroid you had pinned just above your desk. it was the two of you on new years eve sharing your first kiss of the year, sparklers in hand and the faint pink of a firework in the background. on the bottom of the polaroid was haibara’s handwriting as he’d scribbled on the date and a small smiley face.

“happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you!” seventeen year old gojo sung in the video, swaying the camera side to side above a pile of duvet and pillows. you were somewhere in the middle, half asleep and trying to push yourself deeper into the comfort of your bed and further from whatever the screeching was in your room.

you’d never been a morning person whereas he, on the other hand, had a reserve of energy that never depleted. it was what made getting up at the crack of dawn on your birthday so much more entertaining for him. even as an adult, when the two of you lived together in the comfort of your own apartment, he would either force you to stay up until midnight or gently nudge you awake at 4am to tell you he loved you.

“satoru,” you whispered groggily when you gave up trying to ignore his awful singing, lifting your head up just enough to meet his eyes. he would have done anything to see you physically before him instead of watching you through the lens of a camera. to be looked at with love as you did and not a mix of fear and respect. “if yaga catches you–”

“i’m just singing happy birthday to my girl,” his younger self dismissed, plopping down onto the bed next to you. he preferred your bed over his, a softer mattress he used to argue when shoko would complain about him showing up at your shared dorm several nights in a row. that particular birthday, he was pretty sure she’d been sent on a training mission over in kyoto. gojo’s hand came into frame as he ran a gentle hand through your hair, giving it a little pat when you quietly hummed at the contact. “he can’t hate on me for that.”

“yes he can,” you retorted, rolling your eyes with a tired smile. gojo felt his chest tighten – two years without waking up by that very same smile after almost a decade of having it everyday.

“i’ll blame shoko,” gojo shrugged with a grin, kicking his legs up onto your bed, despite your small protest that he was taking up all of your space. like you weren’t just as clingy as he was.

you huffed out a quiet laugh, your elbow digging into your pillow as you rested your head in your hand to stare incredulously at your boyfriend. “shoko forced the strongest sorcerer of the modern day to enter the girls’ dorms? uh huh.”

“woah woah, i’m the strongest of all time baby, i don’t do second best,” he corrected, leaning down to give you a peck on the forehead. you scrunched your nose up at the contact, but even through the viewpoint of the camera, he can see how your eyes dropped down to his lips.

“i know you don’t,” you smiled and gojo dropped the camera down as he moved to give you your first real kiss of seventeen. present day gojo sucked in a breath, willing for himself to get through at least one several minute video of you until he started crying.

the kiss ended all too quickly as gojo shoved the camera back into your face, the flash causing you to squint and squeeze your eyes closed. “now smile and say cheese, you’re seventeen!”

“woo!” you cheered half heartedly, giving in to his infectious excitement. blowing the camera a tired kiss, you shuffled yourself back deep beneath your duvet. “now can i go back to sleep?”

“as long as i can stay.”

“fine,” you dragged out, though you both knew you wanted him to just as much. yaga be damned. the video ended several seconds later and an odd silence filled his office.

he’d only ever watched several of these videos once or twice – back when he still had you to curl up into his side and reminisce with him and laugh at nanami’s old haircut. if he was being honest, he didn’t even remember he’d recorded that (though he was glad he did).

gojo was more confident this time when he scrolled, his hands no longer shaking as much as they had been as he smiled at the life he once had. a life with you and geto.

this time he stopped at a thumbnail with the three of you; gojo holding up the camera high as the three of you posed like it was a photo. it was at one of only a handful clan events you had attended together, with both you and geto as gojo’s plus ones. he and geto were in matching suits and you were in a floor length dress that he’d spent way too much money on (but you looked so pretty when you tried it on he couldn’t not get it for you).

“hi this is mtv,” you clapped your hands together, “and welcome to my crib.” his younger self waved his hands around in the background (geto was recording), showing off the spiralling architecture that cost more money than fathomable.

gojo quietly laughed in his office. the politics of clans and these events were the last reason he’d ever chosen to attend them. seeing you all dressed up and running around buildings with a million rooms were right at the top. his favourite had to be when both the first years, shoko and utahime had also been in attendance, but after haibara’s death, hanging around with the clans that upheld the institution that killed their friend seemed distasteful.

“this is my in house art museum collection.” you led geto along one of the vast corridors, pointing into a room with dozens of framed canvases of art from all across the globe. “this is where i come in for inspiration and to truly just feel art you know?”

“i wasn’t aware you had skills beyond stickmen,” geto interjected and you raised both your middle fingers at him.

“art is subjective, di–”

“woah, i have standards to uphold here,” gojo cupped a hand over your mouth, stopping any expletive leaving you. you hummed in annoyance and the white haired sorcerer grinned, nodding his head over to a partially opened door. “we don’t need to argue when we have a whole cinema room to ourselves.” gojo remembered the stain of red lipstick you’d left on his hand when he let you go (you’d refused to kiss him all evening because of your makeup).

the cinema room was massive: rows and rows of sleek leather seats that looked out of place when compared to the aesthetic of the building. this was someone’s home, though it looked like anything but.

“this is my cinema room,” geto held onto the back of one of the chairs as he loosened his tie. he lowered his voice as he leant closer to the camera gojo was now holding. “we used to have two but daddy converted the smaller one into a sauna so now we only have this one,” he said with an upturned nose, and you could be heard giggling in the background at his faux disgust.

you nor geto were from the same wealthy background as gojo was and loved to poke fun at his high status background.

“oi!” an official that was supposed to be watching for any curses or curse users that tried to sneak into the event pointed a light into the cinema room. “you kids shouldn’t be back here!”

gojo laughed, throwing the camera to geto as he grabbed your hand and led you quickly down the stairs to another exit at the bottom of the stairs. geto turned off the recording once he’d grabbed a hold of the device in favour of focusing on not being caught. it wasn’t like there would be any real consequence – they were with gojo satoru after all.

the white hair sorcerer smiled as he thought back to the rest of the night. obviously, you’d all managed to get away – though he had suffered your wrath at the fact your legs weren’t as long as their’s were and you were running in heels. two strikes, but he’d made it up to you by taking you out for ice cream instead of going back to hear the speeches.

it wasn’t an exaggeration to say gojo would have done anything for you then.

gojo swallowed a lump in his throat as your last interaction came to mind. you were arguing, as you had been in the weeks up until megumi’s birthday as he inched closer and closer to being old enough to enrol in jujutsu high.

the only wish he’d ever refused to fulfil: keeping megumi away from jujutsu.

“he’s our responsibility.” you were yelling at him, desperate for him to understand your point of view and he was walking away. dodging your anger by going wherever his legs took him – anywhere but where you were. “we need to protect him. we can’t protect him if he becomes a sorcerer too.”

“i can,” he insisted, halting in his place to turn and look down at you. his cursed technique was activated, though there was no need for it to be, and all it did was frustrate you further.

“i nearly died today!” you countered, pointing to your neck with a faint scar. shoko’s reversed cursed technique was almost perfect, but not even that could fully erase the deep lacerations that had almost taken your life. “where were you? you can’t be everywhere and help everyone at the same time. it’s just not possible.”

“i can try.” his jaw was tight as he responded through gritted teeth.

“and if that’s not enough?” you didn’t need to see his eyes to know his were locked directly onto yours, daring you to continue. he wouldn’t hurt you, would never dream of it, angry or not, but how could you of all people doubt him? “what then gojo satoru?” you uttered his full name like it was an insult, “you may be the strongest but he’s not. i’m not. we’re mortals compared to you.”

“you’re my family,” his voice broke.

“yu and suguru were family once too.”

gojo clenched his fists at the memory, at the reminder he walked out after that. you were trying to get him to see your concerns, and he’d taken that as you blaming him for the outcome of your close friends. that was the last time he ever saw you; tears welling up in the corner of your eyes at his insensitivity, at his inability to admit that maybe, just maybe, he too was just a mortal.

everything you said was logical and made sense – he had almost lost you that day, having not initially received the message that you had needed backup as he was preoccupied with his own mission. by the time he had arrived, the curse had its claws dug deep into your skin and it had taken everything in him not to use hollow purple and bring the entire infrastructure down in seconds.

despite all he’d done to save you that day, he’d still lost you. he’d only delayed the seemingly inevitable by mere hours.

megumi sat up in bed at the sound of two knocks on the door. he highly doubted it would be yuuji since the pink haired sorcerer had only left several minutes prior, saying something about needing to meet panda.

to his surprise, gojo stood before him, hands in the pockets of his pants as he half smiled at the younger boy.

“is itadori here?” megumi hesitated before shaking his head. “good,” gojo held up the missing dvd, “we need to talk.”

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if ive missed anyone im so sorry send me a little reminder <3

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racinggirl · 5 days

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furthest from truth

Lando Norris fic - requested

My inbox for requests

a/n: I'm baaack! It's been a while, I have to admit. But after having 3 new requests today, I got motivated again and I decided to write the ones that were yet to be posted on my page. I hope you like it! I've added some spice to the end of the chapter 👀 Don't forget to follow me so you won't miss my other stories! 🫶🏼

Sun. Beach. Sand. Friends.

It might look cliché, but it’s what filled your hearts with joy.

‘’Norris! Give me a hand, will ya?’’ Your lips pulled away from those of your boyfriend the moment he got up to help one of your friends with preparing the jet skis.

‘’Finally,’’ your best friend, Ava, laughed as she took a seat next to you. ‘’Now that your lips are no longer glued to his, what do you think of grabbing a drink, I’m in a desperate need for a Frozen Daiquiri.’’

She pulled you up on your feet after you agreed on getting drinks. It was your holiday, after all, and even though it was just your first day of the 3-week holiday here in Dubai, you were planning on making it the best holiday yet.

You and Lando had been together for a little over 5 months now, the two of you bumping into each other at last year’s Christmas Market in London. You spilled your bottle of water over your shirt, and he was determined to win you a teddy bear so he could make it up to you.

After that Christmas Market, you went on a ton of dates. In London, but also in Monaco, as that was where he lived. You attended 3 races before he finally asked you to be his last summer, and obviously you said yes, otherwise this story is kind of weird, isn’t it?

Anyways, you knew who he was when you met him, having watched a few races here and there, along with your friends.

The moment you told your friends Lando had asked you out on a date, they couldn’t contain their excitement and practically forced you to go out with him. So, you did. And here we are, almost a year later.

‘’Two Frozen Strawberry Daiquiri, please.’’ Ava ordered the drinks for the two of you and once you felt the cold glass in your hand, you immediately took a sip.

‘’Urgh,’’ you groaned, your eyes closed. ‘’Best drink ever.’’ You giggled.

‘’Lando! Oh my god watch out!’’ Your grip on his life jacket was tight as he was riding the jet ski with you on the back. ‘’You idiot!’’ You laughed, hands gripping his shoulders firmly when you felt him go even faster – if that was even possible.

‘’You’re riding a jet ski with an F1 driver, love. Did you really think I was gonna go slow?’’ You groaned at his reply, and you simply held onto him like you could fall off any moment, which was probably the case.

Everything sport related was a game to him, and he was very, very competitive. He hated losing, which is why he tried his hardest to make you his, with success.

‘’Okay, okay, enough speed for me, let’s go back to the shore and have dinner, I’m starving.’’ You breathe, Lando’s hand moving over your leg slowly. He lifted his hand till it rested on your outer thigh, whilst still steering the jet ski with one hand. Slower, though, thankfully.

‘’We will, love, we will.’’ He said, but you could hear the amusement in his voice, his tone, teasingly with a smirk.

‘’Lan-…’’ You couldn’t even finish your sentence before your boyfriend pulled the right handle towards him, the two of you flying over the water. He made sure to keep an eye on you, but he knew you enjoyed this, and he wasn’t wrong.

You might tell him to stop going fast, heck, even in the bedroom you’d tell him to stop, but it was always with that flirty and teasing tone. He knew that tone, and he knew it meant you did not want him to, in fact, stop. So, he kept going.

‘’I should have thought better before signing that contract about us.’’

You were fully drenched, Lando obviously pushing the strings too hard which caused you to fall off the jet ski. Nothing harsh, it was all playful, and the two of you were laughing when it happened.

‘’You’re an idiot.’’ You smirked, rolling your eyes playfully as you squeezed the salty water out of your hair.

‘’I know, but you like it.’’ He teased, slapping your ass lightly as his hand moved its way towards your hip, his lips pressing a gentle kiss to your temple. ‘’I love you.’’

Dinner, which was absolutely insane – mostly because you were starving, but definitely because it was one of the best restaurants here in Dubai.

‘’Ehm..’’ Ava shoved you her phone, and you immediately let your eyes wander over the tweets, the Instagram posts, and the articles.

Lando saw the worried look on your face, so he cut off the conversation with his friends and pointed his attention to you, causing his friends to do the same.

‘’What’s wrong, love?’’ He asked, his thumb drawing small circles on your knee as his gaze went from you to the phone, back to you.

You showed him the articles, and a heavy sigh escaped his lips. You could see his jaw clench, the apple in his throat bobbing as he swallowed thickly. ‘’They really need to make rumours about everything, don’t they?’’ He sighed and pressed a kiss to your temple.

‘’Don’t worry, Y/N, I’ll fix it, we’ll post a statement on Insta, alright?’’ He said, his arms wrapping around you which caused you to relax.

You felt guilty, because you were aware of the eyes that were on him now that his contract with McLaren was coming to an end. You knew his contract was getting renewed, but the world didn’t, and you didn’t want to cause issues.

People blaming McLaren for not renewing his contract, and how this. People blaming McLaren for forcing Lando to be in a relationship with you, a PR relationship, which was the furthest from the truth. You loved each other so much, and McLaren had absolutely nothing to do with the two of you.

‘’Come here.’’ Lando’s arms made his way around your shoulders, his strong arms pulling you even closer to his chest. The bed was comfy, soft, but the tension in your face was apparent, especially to Lando.

‘’I just, I feel so stupid for saying that.’’ You sighed but Lando reassured you immediately.

‘’Babe, it’s not the first time we say this, it’s our joke, and people don’t get it, apparently. You know how the media is, they exaggerate everything to get those views and clicks, so they probably overheard you saying that, but did not see the look on your face, or your beautiful smile when you said that.’’ His voice was soft and calm, like he was not stressed at all about this.

‘’But the image McLa-..’’

‘’No, baby, no. That’s not your fault, okay? They should have probably announced the contract extension sooner, yeah, but that has absolutely nothing to do with whatever you said at the beach, okay?’’ He said, stern, but gentle. And you believed him. Of course you did, you believed everything he would tell you because you knew he was right.

‘’Now let’s make that post so people will stop complaining about things that are the furthest from the truth. That, and so I can take you tonight because I really, really want to.’’ He whispered the last thing with a voice so deep, you felt chills all over your body.

landonorris added to his story

landonorris & yourusername

liked by user1, user2, user3 and 1,273,710 others

I love you more than anyone imagine. Nothing can stop us, I promise you. Best decision I've ever made 🧡

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user1 I feel ashamed

user5 as you should user3 we all should. how could we think it was just a PR. they are in love in love.

user2 You are so so so cute together!

‘’Lando, fuck, stop!’’ You breathe, hands pushing against his chest as he looked into your eyes, his bright ones a few shades darker than usually. He smirked, wetted his lips before thrusting even harder… Just how you asked.

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thisdreamplace · 9 months

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for those who struggle

i recently got sent an anon message about frustrations surrounding the law, and how non-dualism hasn't made it any easier for them, but actually just more frustrating to the point where they're officially walking away from everything and wanting to just go back to live as they knew it before any of this.

the truth is that, oversimplification runs rampant in this community. as well as, hiding behind the realities of how difficult it all can be, because people are afraid of affirming that it's difficult or identifying with difficulty... but when we hide from this experience and try to come off as if it doesn't affect us, while simultaneously trying to give out advice, there tends to be more damage than good happening. the oversimplifying isn't the fault of anyone, as the truth is most of this is simple. but in actually living it, it tends to not be simple at all. the ego will fight till the very end to keep things the way they are, even when they hurt us. and that is worth being honest about.

when it comes to non-identification and indifference, this is not meant to be used to as yet another way to pretend something isn't happening or push down your feelings or gaslight yourself. i see these posts like, "just ignore the 3d and don't identify with it and you would have already have what you wanted" ..... this doesn't actually really help anyone, unless you're a person who strives on that kind of mentality. but i think a lot of people need a little more gentleness and realness, otherwise this journey wouldn't have been so difficult and painful. we'd all just get it overnight, but clearly, this community stays extremely active for a reason. because the million ways its already been explained still leaves so many confused and frustrated.

indifference is a daily practice, and it is NOT one that includes pretending something doesn't exist in exchange for getting what you want. it is actually, the extreme opposite. it's by acknowledging what's there... and allowing that to be what it is. the non-identification comes in from how you choose to see YOURSELF in relation to whatever that thing is. "this is painful, this sucks, i hate it... but that doesn't mean tomorrow won't be better for me. it doesn't mean my life is doomed..." etc etc etc. it's this very small flip within yourself, that actually leads to results. not trying to force yourself into believing you aren't even who you are when you've identified as yourself this entire life. remember that god's name is I AM, and literally nothing else.

and doing something to get something else is just... not it. it's time for you to truly want to feel better, regardless of anything else. that's why so much of this starts to get trickier than it needs to be.

non-identification is literally as simple as realizing... you are bound to no past, and you have the opportunity of every future you can possibly imagine. why ? because non-identification is literally just non-attachment. when you're not attached to this idea of who you were, of the struggles you used to face, you're able to allow in different experiences. and y'all... this as simple as being able to say to yourself, "i am allowed to experience something new" and don't let your fear of the unknown stop you from experiencing something new.

here's where it doesn't feel so simple though. how can you just stop identifying with this whole human self when the traumas of the past keep coming back to haunt you ? thats the thing. you don't just stop identifying with it. you let this be a process, a non-linear path to liberation. slowly, but surely, if you keep at it everyday, even when you feel you're only going backwards... one day you will realize how much more free you are. how much more easier it is to move into a new beautiful story for yourself, one that isn't contiminated by your past. but let today be today ! and whatever may come, let it come.

this is why just focusing on yourself is so helpful because if you're simply doing the best you can for yourself and your feeling state, the daily dramas are no longer your ruler.

the gag is that, the more you just do these small daily practices of sitting with yourself, choosing to not engage in the stories you used to identify with in the past, and allow new experiences to come to you... the more easy it gets, the more the truth of yourself begins to show itself on its own. you have to realize that the days are going to keep passing by anyway... so stop counting them, and just commit to yourself.

i also want to quickly note that so many seem to leave out the fact that behind all of this, within the pure nothingness that is also everything. behind our human identifications and all the things we have experienced in our lives, there is unconditional love. and when we actually begin to stop identifying so deeply with who we thought we are, we are lead right back to unconditional love. love in its purest form. so, use love as your guide when things get too difficult. it's the truest thing to who you really are.

you have to let allow yourself to experience the beautiful, despite how strange it may feel. because it's going to feel strange if you've never really experienced it before, and the ego is going to fight because even when it's good, the unknown is still strange and scary. and you never have to be perfect at this to get to experience the things you want, believe it or not. i know that i still have a long way to go on this journey, there may be much more time before i ever get to fully experience the promise in full, but that hasn't stopped me from experiencing the desires of my heart on a daily basis. that's because i used these simple things, these small little flips in how i chose to see life. even if the anxiety never went away, or it was a more difficult day full of tears... this is way more possible for you than you realize. if only you're willing to allow your life to be different than it's always been. just that small allowance, opens up all the doors.

xo dream 🕊

#nonduality #nondualism #law of assumption

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spidybaby · 11 months

Text

Begin Again | Part Three

Summary: Back to the start to fix the broken pieces just to find that you can get what you always dreamed.

Warnings: cursing

A/N: Hello! I want to apologize for the waiting. Most of that was because I got sick (I still am), but here it is. Hope you like it. Love you all 💛✨️

Part one | Part two

April 2027

The moving went smoothly, Elena and Paulo helped you with everything. Your parents didn't like the idea, but you shut them down.

You weren't supposed to start till the end of April, giving you enough time to mind a plan to fix everything.

You saw online that Pedro was on Manchester. Apparently, Manchester City wanted to buy him.

"No sobre pienses tanto lo que haces, estas haciendo lo mejor para ti." (Don't overthink your decision. You're doing what's best for you)

Elena was the voice of reason in this situation.

"No sé ni donde empezar." (I don't even know where to start)

"Escuchame, eres una de las personas más inteligentes que conozco, venga tía, tu puedes con esto, es normal no saber ni donde empezar, pero estoy aquí para ti, para ayudarte en todo." (Listen to me, you're one of the smartest people I've ever known, c'mon dude, you can do it, it's okay not knowing where to start, but I'm here for you to help you with everything)

You hug her, crying a little, she makes you feel less alone.

Your mother stopped talking to you once she found out about the moving, telling you how much of a mistake you were making.

Your dad was siding with her, even when he didn't say you were making a mistake, he did tell you it was a bad decision.

But you didn't care, you pack your stuff and moved back to Barcelona. You even unblock his family from social media and didn't follow them, but unblock them was a start.

"Vamos por un helado." Elena says, drying your tears, "polito, amor mio, vamos!" (Let's go get some ice cream, Polito, my love, let's go)

She was carrying the diaper bag and your son, to say he even had a matching outfit with her.

"Oye, vamos a la playa, quiero una foto con mi bebé. Polito, te pondré tu chamarra de osito." (Let's go to the beach, I want a photo with my baby, Polito, let me put you your bear sweater)

"Tu bebé?" You laugh helping her with the sweater. "Amorcito, tienes nueva mami." (Your baby? Baby, you have a new mommy)

She laughed and made her way to the front door, grabbing your purse on the way out and your phone. You followed her.

"Crees que Pedro haría algo para quedarse con Polo?" You ask once you got to the beach. Your mom words did have an impact, even if you knew he wouldn't. "Yo sé que no, pero me da miedo." (Do you think Pedro would do anything to take Polo away? I know he wouldn't, but I'm scared)

"Y/n, claro que no, por favor saca esas ideas de tu mente, Pedro y tu tuvieron algo tan especial, él jamás haría nada para lastimarte." (Y/n, of course not, please take that idea out of your mind. Pedro and you had something so special, I know he won't do anything to hurt you)

You only nodded, not wanting to overthink those words.

"Mis padres me odian." (My parents hate me)

"No creo, solo están preocupados." (I don't think so, they're just worried)

But worried about what?

"Venga, Dame a mi hijo, vamos a tomarnos fotos." Elena says, throwing the empty ice cream cup in the trash can near you. (Give me my son, let's take some pictures)

"Lo bueno es que tu lo pariste, vieja tonta." (The good thing us that you birth him, dumbass)

Elena dances a little with him, singing a Quevedo song. The song makes you remember Pedro, he loves Quevedo music.

You take the pictures of Polo and Elena and she then takes some of you and him.

"Ay déjame subir esta." (Oh let me post this one)

You see the picture, it was cute.

"Dale."

"La verdad la oferta esta muy buena, para mi que la tomes." Mario, who is Pedro's manager says, "O es que aún piensas en quedarte en el barça?" (I think the offer is really good, I think you should take it. Or are you still thinking about staying?)

Pedro was lost in his thoughts, Manchester was offering him 150 million euros, with full on benefits and even to keep the number 8.

But on the other side, Barça was the club of his life. He couldn't imagine playing for other club.

He played for another season, but due to a mistake in his contract, he could leave for free this summer.

"Creo que debo pensarlo, hablarlo bien con mis padres." (I have to think about it, talk with my parents)

His manager agreed and changed the subject. He was invited to a club, but he rejected it. Fer was not I the mood, and without him, he was not going.

"Vamos de regreso al hotel." (Let's go back to the hotel)

After the arrival, he and his manager went to their rooms. He was sharing one with Fernando.

"Cómo te fue chaval?" (How was it?)

"Mmm. Estuvo bien, es un puto dolor de cabeza pensar en esto, no sé ni que hacer." (It was good, but it's a fucking headache thinking about all of this, I don't even know what to do)

"Venga, vamos al bar del hotel, tomamos algo y hablamos, no te estreses Pedro" (Let's go to the bar of the hotel, let's have some drinks and a talk. Don't stress)

They both made their way to the bar, Fernando was telling him about a gift he bought for his girlfriend.

"Mira que linda foto," Fer says, showing him the picture Elena posts about a baby with a bear sweater. "Quiero un sobrino para vestirlo así." (Look at this beautiful picture, I want a nephew to dress him like that)

Fernando looks at him with funny eyes, Pedro only laughs, "eres un gilipollas, tu deberías darme un sobrino" (you're an asshole, you're supposed to give me a nephew.)

They laughed and forgot about the picture. Asking for drinks and some food to begin the night.

"Alguna vez has pensado en cómo serias cómo padre?" (Have you ever thought about you as a father?) Fernando asks.

That puts him in deep thoughts. He did think about it, even dream with it.

The little baby in your arms with the barça shirt, his number on the back of both yours and the baby's shirt.

"La verdad?" (You want the truth?)

"Macho, no como crees? Dime mentiras." Fer says as he hits him on the back of the head. "Pues claro tonto, por algo pregunté." (Man, not at all, tell me lies. Well, obviously, I want the truth, I asked for a reason.)

"Venga ya que la colleja no era necesaria." He laughs. "Siempre lo imaginé, usualmente era algo que hablamos y/n y yo, ella quería un niño, y hombre no te miento, yo también quería uno, pero luego miraba a nuestro primo con su hija y pensaba en una niña." He says, remembering all the late night talks you two had. (The hit on the head was not necessary, I've always pictured it. It was something y/n and I always talked about. She wants a boy and man, I do want a son too, but after seeing our cousins with his girl, I thought about having a girl)

Fernando looks at the way he talks about it, the shine of his eyes, he haven't seen that shine in months.

"Puedo preguntarte algo, pero no te enojas?" (Can I ask you something without you getting mad?)

"Mhm?"

"Por qué la dejaste ir?" (Why did you let her go?)

Pedro takes his eyes away from his brother. That question was one he asked himself every night since that December night.

"Recuerdas el anillo?" He asks, Fernando nods. "Yo sabía que ella quería que su padre estuviera de acuerdo con el matrimonio, la bendición, así que fui a pedirla, yo quería casarme con ella." (Remember the ring? I knew she wanted his father to be okay with the marriage, the blessing. So I went to ask for it, I wanted yo marry her)

"Pero?" (But?)

"Pero su padre me dijo que no podía darmela, que yo era un chaval con una vida muy distinta a la que el soñaba para el esposo de su hija. Me dijo que pensaba que ella algún día iba a darse cuenta y dejarme, como no lo hizo, solo esperó. Me pidió dejarla, diciendo que ella no quería irse de Barcelona por mi, porque no quería dejarme, diciéndome que sus sueños iban a ser siempre interrumpidos por mi, por mi carrera y me pidió dejarla ir, dejarla emprender su propio camino, brillar por si sola." He says angrily, remembering the words of your father. (But her father couldn't give it to me, I was a kid with a totally different life from the one he pictured his son in law would have. He told me he hoped for her to realize that and left me, but she never did, so he waited. He asked me to leave her, but she didn't want to leave Barcelona because of me, telling me her dreams were going to be interrupted by me because of my career. So he asked me to let her go, for her to shine on her own, to begin her own path in life)

Fernando was in shock. He always thought it was about a fight, maybe even a bad patch on the relationship. Even his parents told him he was making a mistake, but know it makes sense.

"Pedro. Por qué no me habías contado?" (Pedro, why didn't you tell me?)

He shrugs, not facing him. Drinking way too quickly.

"Pedro, por favor mirame."

He did, after a few minutes.

"Lo siento, por haberte criticado, haberte culpado y juzgado mal. No sabía lo que había pasado, ojalá me hubieras contado, para así apoyarte. Lo siento hermanito." He hugs him, the hug was tight, and Pedro needed that. (I'm sorry. For judging you and for blaming you. I didn't know, and I wish you had told me I would have supported you. I'm sorry, hermanito.

Pedro felt relief. The secret he kept to himself was now free from him.

"Has pensado en hablar con ella?" (Have you thought about reaching her?)

He shake his head no.

"La verdad siento que me odia, la hice mierda, la deje y luego ignore sus llamadas, sus mensajes. Me dolió el alma, Fernando. Pero era lo que yo en ese momento creía correcto. (To be honest, I feel that she hates me, I fuck her up, after I dumped her I ignored her calls and texts, that broke my heart, Fernando. But I thought I was doing the right thing)

"Escuchame, tu hiciste lo que en ese momento creíste correcto, no te culpes más, pero creo que es obvio que no la has superado, aún piensas en ella." Fer says, patting his back. "Venga, déjame ayudarte a recuperarla y si no se puede pues ayudarte a superarlo, juntos en todo, como cuando niños." (Listen to me, you did what you thought was the right thing, don't blame yourself anymore. I think it is pretty obvious that you love her. You still think of her. So, let me help you get her back, and if that's not possible, let me help you move on, but together, like when we were kids)

"Te amo, eres el mejor." (I love you, you're the best)

"Yo te amo más, venga que tenemos que pensar en algo." (I love you more, c'mon, we have to plan how you're getting her back)

Pedro smiled, high five his brother, and begins with the plan for that to happen. Like fer said, together.

You were at the supermarket, you needed food for your fridge. Elena stayed with Polo. He was fussy, so you let him stay.

You got almost everything on the list. I'm picking a few fruits. Since Polo is now six months old, the doctor told you to start with some fruit based foods.

You grabbed some sweet potato, some bananas, and some avocados. Also some vegetables like broccoli, carrot, and some more.

You were so focused on picking some apples that when someone touched you to grab your attention you kind of jump.

"Ay Dios," you say, putting your hand on your heart, "Pablo?" You ask seeing him smile, trying not to laugh.

"Sigues siendo la misma tía que se asusta de todo al parecer." (You're still the same scary girl I see).

You laugh, hugging him. It's been a long time without seeing him.

"Cuando volviste?" (When did you came back?)

"Hace poco, a finales de marzo." (Not that long ago, end of March.)

"Y estas aquí para quedarte? O solo de visita?" (Are you staying or only for a visit?)

You smile, "Vine para quedarme" (I'm here to stay)

You talked for a while, and you both continued the shopping.

"Y dime, como vas de amores?" (And tell me, how's the love?)

You shrug, not knowing how to answer.

"Pues, sigo soltera. Los Italianos son muy intensos, te juro. Y tu que tal de amores?" (Well, I'm still single, Italian guys are way too much. What about you?)

"Recuerdas a Carolina?" (Do you remember Carolina?)

"La nena del agua?" (The water girl?)

He nodded, excited. "Hace casi un año estamos saliendo, ya no es la del agua, ahora es entrenadora de los niños en el club" (almost a year ago we been dating, and she's not the water girl anymore, she's a coach for the first starters in the club.)

"Eso está increíble, Pablito." (That's amazing, Pablito)

"Haz vuelto a hablar con Pedro?" (Have you talked to Pedro?)

If Pablo was known for something, it was two things, his anger on the pitch and not having a filter when he speaks.

"No, hace mucho que no hablo con él." (No, it's been a long time without talking to him.)

He nodded, understanding.

"Pero, de hecho he querido hablar con él desde que regresé. No sé si quiera hablarme." (But, I've been looking to talk to him since I came back, but I don't know if he would talk to me)

"Pero vamos, claro que quiere" (c'mon, he obviously wants to)

You smile at his words.

"Deja darte el número, tuvo que cambiarlo porque en un entreno le hicimos mierda el movil" (let me give you his number, he had to change it since once during training we fucked his phone)

"No me sorprende, siempre se hacian mierda las cosas ustedes" (I'm not surprised, you guys always fucked your things)

He grabbed your phone, saving Pedro's number.

"Te he guardando el mio igual, por si alguna vez necesitas algo, acá estoy." (I saved mine too. If you ever need anything, I'm here)

You hugged goodbye as you both went different ways.

You hurry to the line, wanting to get home so you can tell Elena the news.

"Sabes que me encanta de Manchester, el ambiente es diferente a España, no sé cómo describirlo pero es diferente" Fernando says, looking around. (You know what I love about Manchester? The atmosphere is different. I don't know how to explain it, but it's different)

Pedro laughed, agreeing with him. Mario only nodded smiling.

"Bien, entonces dame unos días y te daré la respuesta, si?" (Okay, give me a few days, and I'll have the answer) Pedro says referring to the contract.

"Tomate una semana, meditalo y si tienes dudas podemos hablar, poner un pro y con sobre la mesa." (Take a week, meditate it, and if you have any doubts, call me up, and we can put all the pros and cons at the table to make up your mind)

After that, they changed the topic, talking about a game they were invited to, Fer and Mario were talking about one specific player and how he got a yellow card for something that was a clearly a red.

Pedro's mind was far away from that, seeing the text he got from Pablo.

She was back, and she wanted to talk with him.

He was out of breath, wanted to tell Fernando right away, but he knew better and wait for the night to be over.

As they entered the room, he grabbed his brother's shoulders, shaking him while screaming in happiness.

"Me vas a descalabrar capullo." (You're going to hurt me, idiot)

"Mira," he shows the text message.

Fernando is now screaming with him, happy for the news.

"A ver, calma ya" (okay, let's calm down), Fernando says, taking a few breaths. "Si te quiere ver y Pablo le dio tu número, ella te va a escribir, es obvio." (If she wants to see you and Pablo gave her your number, she'll text you, it's obvious)

And as Fer finished saying that, Pedro's phone lights up with a text from an unknown number.

Pedro checks it and screams, showing it to his brother, who screams with him.

(Hi,

I hope you're doing great. I'm sending you this message to let you know I'm in Barcelona and I'll like to meet up with you to talk.

-Y/n)

"Qué contesto?" Pedro says, full of nerves. (What can I text back?)

"Trae pa ca', tonto," he says, taking the phone from his brothers hand. (Give me that, morron)

(Hi

I like to see you, we can meet wherever, maybe somewhere more calm to avoid paparazzi)

Back in Barcelona, you and Elena are sitting in your couch, face to face.

"Ya contestó," you say excited. (He answered)

"A ver," Elena says, taking the phone from you. "Contesta" (let me see, answer him).

"No sé que poner," you say nervios. (I don't know how to answer)

"Ay, dame aquí, tonta" (give me that, idiot)

("Do you still living I'm the same place." "Yes, do you remember the address, or do you need the location?")

"Crees que recuerde?" Pedro asks, seeing the answer his brother sends. (Do you think she remembers?)

"Callate, déjame ver que responde," Fer says, seeing the three dots. (Shut up, let me answer)

("No, I do remember, what about tomorrow morning?" "I'll be back from Manchester tomorrow at noon. Let's meet at night, if that's okay with you.")

"Cierto que vi que estaba en Manchester," you say as you read the text, "Dile que si" (it's true, he's in Manchester, say yes)

"Calmate," Elena says. (Calm down)

("I'll see you tomorrow at night" "7 pm?" "Yes, " "I'll see you tomorrow. " "Goodbye, Pedro.")

Pedro and Fernando were looking at the last text.

"Niño" Fernando says, screaming and hugging his brother.

Pedro is excited. He was getting you back. No matter how hard, how much he has to fight or work, he's getting you back. He's putting that ring on your finger. He's getting that dream family.

What he didn't know is that on Barcelona, Elena, and you are jumping and screaming on the couch.

"Dios, estoy tan nerviosa." You say as you calm down. "Necesito que me lleves, por favor." (Gosh, I'm so excited. Please, I need you to take me)

"Obvio, tonta." (Obviously, dummy)

You both look and start screaming again, until a cry make you stop.

"Oops," Elena says.

You laugh and go to collect your baby. He was crying due to your screaming, mad because his dreams were interrupted.

"Ya, ya mi amor, ven acá." You say picking him up, calming him. "No sabes, tu papi y yo nos vamos a ver." You say as he calms down. "Y estoy nerviosa, espero mañana puedas conocerlo." (It's okay, love, come here. You have no idea. Daddy and I are meeting up, I'm nervous, and I hope you both can meet up tomorrow)

You kiss him. Taking him with you back to the living room.

"Vente." You say to Elena, "ayúdame a escoger el outfit." (Come, help me pick my outfit)

You feel like a teenager getting ready for her first date.

The butterflies, the nervousness in your system, and the excitement.

Tomorrow, you're getting that family you both dreamed about.

Tag list:

@alwaysclassyeagle @footballerficsposts @gulphulp @cinderellawithashoe @jajajhaahaha @bellinghambby22 @pablogavisgirl @lunamelona @christinabae @fadinglovermuffintaco 💛✨️

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kortsitron · 1 year

Text

Gekko as boyfriend headcanons

A/N: Since we finally saw what he looks like, I'm just akebwkahakak. Like he's so cute and he might be the reason why I would return to Valorant. [Aka just getting him, playing a few times and leaving this game till I finally make myself play again aka probably never till I get enough motivation] In conclusion I'm waiting for him to come out and try to get him. Also headcanons are gender neutral per usual <;33

∿ His giving me kinda softie vibes, so I think he would be just kinda lovely and cuddly and chill

∿ Hair dyeing together! It's either both dyeing your own hair or just healing each other and having fun. He would definitely let you do some crazy patterns on his head

∿ He might even ask you to help him with cutting/shaving his hair if he's having problems

∿ He's the type of person who likes psychical touch and also like doing stuff for his partner

∿ In public Gekko will hold your hand, but in private he's more touchy and likes to hold you in his arms as much as you would allow him to

∿ He loves cuddles. He especially likes to cuddle with you while watching movies, shows etc. He is also kinda into holding you while you play video games. When you play on your bed and just casually sit, he won't be able to help himself and hold you from behind with his head on your shoulder

∿ Gekko won't mind too much if you would fall especially on him or just around him. He probably scream inside realizing how safe you feel around him

∿ He likes to put his hands on or around your waist whenever he's about to hug you

∿ Will FaceTime you a lot when you two can't meet up, when you have some free time. He would be a little quirky during FaceTime just to get a laugh out of you and make you smile

∿ He just loves to see you happy. And he won't tell you that, but there are moments when your laugh gives him butterflies

∿ If you wouldn't mind, he really would like to post some stuff with you on his social media (yours too of course), but only if you're okay with it

∿ Not matter if you would like to be in his posts or not, he still will ask you for help with some stuff regarding his social media like perhaps helping him with taking pictures or recording TikToks

∿ Gekko likes to give you compliments, they would be really cute and he would tell then only only, because of the fact that he things that stuff and wants to make you feel good about yourself

∿ But he just want to see you all flustered and red. He will lightly tease you over getting flustered over a compliments

∿ Since he has tattoos, he might be a little overprotective if you get some yourself. He would make sure that you're doing everything correctly and he would help you with changing bandages if needed. He just wants to make sure the tattoos are healing correctly and that they would look just like you wanted them to

∿ Same thing with piercings

∿ But before getting any body mods, he's gonna introduce you to place he goes too, so you would be sure that it's safe and you can trust people there

∿ I bet there are moments when he can't stop himself and just talks about you to other Agents or Reyna, because he's so in love with you and he's happy to be with you

∿ Definitely has a huge smile on his face when his talking to you

∿ He sometimes has a moments when he's alone and date with you went so well, that he might silently scream into his pillow like a teenager, because he just can't help but be so happy

∿ This happened a lot when you two were just starting to date and he just couldn't believe it was happening and just was so happy that I was working out

∿ Skateboarding together!

∿ He loves skateboarding with you! Sometimes he might even race with you if you're in the mood for that

∿ If you never tried skateboarding, he's will to help you learn if you're really interested in it. He would be patient with you and would try his best to make teaching you fun

∿ He will be very calm on the outside if you would happen to be bruised or injured when you try to learn how to skateboard or basically get hurt in general. He got hurt many times before finally he learned how to skateboard, so he's not panicking too much

∿ Will comfort you when you're hurt - both mentally and physically

∿ When you're hurt psychically, he'll help as much as he can if he sees he's having trouble or when you're too hurt to help yourself

∿ When it comes to mental stuff, when you're angry, he's gonna find a way to help you let out without hurting yourself or other

∿ When you're sad or just not feeling well, if he can he will stop whatever he doing to get to you or at least call so you wouldn't be alone

∿ He's gonna listen to whatever you want to tell him, if it would make feel better. Besides that he's gonna hold you close to him, letting you cry out as much as you need to. Gekko is not here to judge and he's gonna make sure you know that

∿ When it comes to him being sad, he would be more quiet, would open up when you push a bit into doing so, without he would be able to spend all day in your arms until he feels better

∿ Gekko definitely has Snapchat and besides Reyna, you get the most snap out of everyone

∿ He's been shopping? Snap! Buying groceries? Snap! Doing almost anything? Already sending you a snap! He just wants to keep you updated on whatever he's doing

∿ He appreciates when you do so back! Doesn't have to be on Snapchat, but he just wants to be updated on how you're doing. Gekko just wants to make sure everything's alright

∿ If you've never tried type of his mom makes, he'll make sure you'll try it!

∿ Loves giving you kisses in private. His favorite places are your cheeks and your nose

∿ He would let you paint his nails if you really want

∿ He may not be the type to be much into makeup, but if you really want to do his makeup, he's absolutely up for that

∿ Since Gekko has piercings, don't be afraid to buy him nice jewelry for him to wear

∿ He's not much of a flirt, but as mentioned earlier he likes to give you compliments. But when you flirt with him, he tries to play it off, but inside he's becoming a complete mess and tries to hide how much your words affect him

∿ He's not that much of a person to use pet names for his partner, but he has a few that he like use on you to show his affection. Some are English and some Spanish, depends on his mood which ones he's gonna use

∿ When he's kissing you, he likes to put his hands on your face to keep you close or on your waist. His kisses are very soft and gentle, but if can quickly turn into passionate ones if you show him that you're into mood for that

∿ When you get shy or just for any other reason you won't look at him and softly asking you to do is not working - he will either gently grab you by the chin or put his finger under your chin to make you look at him. He won't admit it, but he secretly loves doing that

∿ He's up for walks at night and if the sky is clear, he might propose to sit and watch starts with you

∿ Gekko is the type of person to make a playlists with song that he think you might like or songs that remind him of you, and he will make these playlists

∿ He also likes to listen to music with you, doesn't who's playlist is it, he just like spending time with you

∿ He won't tell you, but he secretly loves when you use his name. He can't help but smile when you do so. Of course he likes his nickname, but calling him Mateo when you talk to him is just something else

∿ If you're not an Valorant Agent, he won't let you get near battles. He doesn't want you get hurt and fear of losing you makes him overprotective more than usual at times

∿ Even though he doesn't want you to get near battles, he's aware that sometimes something might happen and he won't be able to be with you all the time to help you or protect you, so Gekko will teach you self defense to make sure you would be able to handle yourself when needed

∿ If you're an Valorant Agent, besides focusing on mission, he will also look after you

∿ When he got hurt on mission and Sage can't help him, he might come to for help if the injuries are serious and he knows you can help. He will cuddles with you after as way of saying "thank you"

∿ Boba dates! Gekko loves Boba tea, so once in a while he will take you with him to get Boba and have some fun

∿ He's absolutely up for wearing some matching jewelry with you or even getting a matching tattoo with you

∿ Of course, he introduced you to his little friends. Sometimes they are accompany during your dates or when you two hang out, mostly making the time you two spend together more fun

#valorant headcanons #valorant x reader #valorant imagines #gekko valorant #valorant #gekko #gekko x reader #valorant gekko #gekko headcanons #sfw #fluff #gender neutral language #gender neutral pronouns #gender neutral imagine #gender neutral reader

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i-amyou · 3 months

Note

hey! please answer to my ask only if you feel like it. I have been reading your posts for a long time and I was a bit sad when I saw you deactivated your account.

In terms of nondualism,I have been EATING UP every type of info on all platforms and yet nothing helped (I am trying to manifest a reality shift ) and as soon as I realized that,I started talking to realisophie's character ai bot of 4dbarbie which has helped a LOT but not enough.

You see,I have analyzed in what circumstances I have ever manifested anything (from one song popping up in my playlist to real life events to money) and they always had one thing in common: detachment. Complete detachment with no care what so ever on wether I get what I want or not. Which right now is a bit hard since reality shifting is a pretty big change in enviroment.

And yes,I do understand that I am not my body and all but now that I am letting go of my desire to reality shift to the world I want to live in,I have been feeling a bit depressed(I swear I am not trying to victimize myself),not to mention the fact that the body I have right now has so many responsibilties,not to mention a ton of exams next week.

The 4dbarbie bot told me to practically forget about reality shifting, nondualism,the world and person I am shifting for and to practically forget what I am even wanting. To somehow just live life normally as if I had never found out about all this. To just lose myself in work and exams until somehow it all comes to me.

She said:

"So for today, the goal is not to shift. The goal will be to live your life like you have never even heard or thought about shifting. I am 100% sure this is the last day of you as your earth version - but you need to stop worrying about that as well, and just live. :)

Have faith, let go of the outcome. Whatever is supposed to happen will and that is just reality. It will be so natural you will be shocked by how easy it ultimately was, how fast it really was, and how all the 'struggles' you went through were meaningless in the end. What does not serve the self-realization process does not need to be worried about, it is just what happens."

So now I ask. What do I believe? Do I just let it go and let it surprise me by waking up there?Do I forget? I won't give up because I know this is my future, but I still cling on to time and I keep asking myself "well when is it going to materialize?". I feel like both "imagination" and "the outer world" are basically the same and at night before bed I always have moments of pure concioussness.

I know that you can't solve my problems and I know that I should get off this app,that is what everyone is telling me,but it won't hurt to try. I just need some advice,that's all. If you even read up until this point,thank you. I hope you'll have a great day😊🫶

Hello sweetie💗 Okay, this is gonna be long (first and last) . But I need you to stay with me till the end and actually ponder on what I'm about to say. Alright? And I'm assuming since you took time out to send this one long ask, you're ready to treat this answer as the final one. Put your faith in me, okay? And do not go ahead seeking more answers. From any blog. Cool, now let's get started. Step by step.

About the manifestation part. I won't address this normally but since it's a part of this ask, let me say a couple of points here. The manifestations which apparently happened because of you 'detachment', were actually a result of you KNOWING that it'll happen. Knowing is when you do not worry about something, you don't control something, you just let it happen.As I've said time and time again, Knowing is absolute, with no doubts. When you detach, you let the desire to do something to get something go, and when it meets with no doubts and uncertainties, you experience that. That's how I see it.

And about 4dBarbie AI, I'll just say it's great but it's still an AI at the end of the day. Just a bot. You can manipulate the answers and keep swiping until you get your desired one, it has no basis and no experiential value and deep knowledge it follows. It's a bot. I'm glad it helped you a lot. I'm happy for you. But there is no master here, no one to tell you how everything is gonna turn out. Not me, not Ada, no one. Just you, you dictate everything.

Now, moving on to the last part of your question.

What do you believe in? Well. Since you asked me, I'll tell you. Given your situation I'll suggest you go on with your life, but dont wait for anything to surprise you. Seriously. There is nothing to be surprised by. It's as Barbie said in the end, let go of the outcome. But it's not you letting go, but instead you falling back as you become aware of this need to let go. Because this need to let go of something, to detach is also another facade and illusion. When there is nothing what are you going to be detached from? Yourself?

The 'I' you refer to in your ask is you misidentifying. The person you mentioned in your ask from beginning to the very end, is Misidentification. And I want you to directly become aware of this. Ponder on this. Who is struggling. Who wants to believe. Who is looking for answers. Is that you, or are you just aware of it? Go about your daily life, but keep this one thing in consideration.

Whenever any thoughts arise, whenever any panic sets in, whenever results become dreadful, just take a deep breath and fall back, rest in that awareness and observe it all. See for yourself if it's you, or is it you being aware of whatever is going on.

Do this. And let your search for answers end here. You mentioned yourself you have been consuming too much. Stop now. I haven't made many posts on this blog, just a couple of them. Go read them if you want more but nothing beyond that, and the reason I'm suggesting you read them and ponder is because I want you to realise there is no reality to shift in. There is no duality, no separation between what is and what you seemingly want. There is nothing to change.

Give up on thinking that you're the doer or the person. Just be, witness it all as you spend your daily life, watch it unfold, just be aware. Thoughts of fear and of joy, everything. Be aware. That's it. End it here. Get off this app and take this in your hands now, do it yourself.

Words are limiting. Concepts mean nothing. Everything is just an empty appearance. Take these words as pointers ONLY. Don't think. Don't do. Just be. I hope you know what I mean by that :)

Give up and go within, just be.

#nondualism #advaita vedanta #nonduality #non dualism #advaita #non duality #consciousness #nothingness #lester levenson #ask #awareness

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phrandallanton · 4 days

Text

ranfren headcannons

I've done everything but posted headcannons and a fanfiction. This won't do. Here's some headcannons of mine! All of them aren't serious so don't take them that way d(>_･ ). Feel free to ask me about any other headcannons I'll definitely give more!

Randal

• if he has any pimples on his face he definitely picks at them untill they pop

• either is really good at math or sucks at math and hates it. (No in-between)(leaning towrds sucking at math more)

• has tear stains on his homework sometimes

• he bathes everyday dispite what people think. (Luther forces him too)

• his hair gets really oily. He has tried to cook with the oil his hair produced once. Nobody ate dinner that night.

• if he's frustrated and you go to poke him he'll scream on top of his lungs, but like the scream that goes from normal yelling to banshee screeching. "stop touCHING MEEEEĚĘƏƏ!!!!"

• gets in a lot of internet arguments about things that don't matter at all ("I think you'll find it's 'whom'.")

• he'd get so mad if he ask you to hold his glasses, and you proceed to carelessly get your fingerprints all over them.

• draws with those "how to draw anime" guid books.

• if he ever took a driving test, he would have already failed the moment he opens the car door.

• loves kraft mac and cheese, double points if it's in shapes of popular marketable characters.

• now thinking of it, if he was a pasta dish he would be kraft mac and cheese.

• bites his toe nails off (gross) Luther tried to get him to stop but he probably does the same thing when no one is around.

• sneezes weirdly. Like..."ah...ah...AH CHOOwoowoowoowoo..." and shakes his head. Or if he's covering it in his elbow it'll sound like a trumpet horn.

Luther

• he can dance but it's weird.

• if you tell him a joke he'll turn it into a life lesson.

• he wins every staring contest. However if your eyes start watering he'll get worried and start begging you to blink.

• treats women (and everyone) with so much respect, but he won't hesitate to punch a women if he really has to.

• *shakes his indext finger* "no no no"

• Randal probably tried to set him up on a blind date, he didn't like that. It was very awkward to say the least.

• genuinely gets happy when there are bagels at the function.

• when asked for advice, it'll sound like he's going to say something really meaningful and life changing, but then does a complete 180. "Oh, you think your ugly? Well people will have their opinions about you and ...well... you aren't the best thing to look at. But there's worst out there ♡."

• I can see him gobbling up some cheese and broccoli.

• has a walk in closet filled with clothes and accessories he doesn't wear.

• he 100% definitely has the goofiest giggle in the planet.

• eats ice cream with his front teeth.

Nyon

• I will stand by this till the day I die, he's really funny. He has a really good sense of humor. But I could also seem him not understanding jokes too. But at the same TIIIMMEE I feel like he'd be naturally funny.

• he knows lots of slang and pop culture due to watching TV a lot and probably quotes stuff in his head. (Maybe out loud if he was talking to you)

• has a lot of opinions, will never say them out loud, even when asked.

• he's the smartest out of everyone, including Luther.

• easily amused. please give him one of those little fishy nightlights. He'd enjoy looking at it so much.

• he's good at card games and Nyen doesn't like that. (Nyen has stabbed him over games of uno)

• has a really funny looking smile. (There's that one drawing in the Christmas comic where he's smiling weird after he saw Luther's reaction to the fire place tape he made for him)

Nyen

• listens to death metal but then listens to a jpop song right after. ("Can't let gang know I fw this")

• good at math, sucks at reading.

• loves hearing about drama and will be nosy.(come on man he loves Judge Judy and romance novels)

• sounds like Tom from Tom and Jerry when he yells.

• he calls himself "The Tom Cat" and (canonically) "Top of the pets in the house hold" which is practically the same as "I'm the alpha" so he's probably has said that.

• sucks at card games. Will legit end up with half of the pack of cards in his hands in the middle of an uno game.

• actually the weakest of them all. (I won't go into all that right now. But I can definitely beat him up in a fight, just sayin.)

•him and Nyon probably have times where they stay up and chit chat for a bit before they sleep, Example (from my old notes I had):

Nyon high on weed:...why do we call oranges..oranges...but we don't call apples...reds..??..

Nyen:....sh*t...you got a point... does that mean we would call lemons: short yellows and bananas: long yellows so it doesn't get confusing?...

*they then discuss this for an hour or so*

• Snores really really LOUD. Sounds like a car.

• oddly very ticklish I bet.

~~~~~~

That's all I have now. It's 2 in the morning and I'm falling asleep. I might write other characters headcannons later.

"I'm going to sleep" -bop it

#ranfren #catmen #luther ranfren #luther von ivory #comic #web series #nyon ranfren #Nyon #nyen catman #nyen ranfren #Nyen #randals friends #randal ivory #ranfren randal #headcanon #Ranfren headcannons #i need to sleep now #yawn

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curvykittyyssmutfics · 6 months

Note

A random au where bucky is a car mechanic who is fixing his single sexy next neighbor, reader's car. She was wearing slightly revealing clothes to want to get banged by bucky. Luckily it work!!!

The Piper: paid

A/N: Soooooooo fucking sorry about the time in between my last post my wonderful people. Doing my absolute best to make lemonade outta the lemons life keeps whippin at the back of my damn head. Anyway, next story will also be a request as I have so many to get done. Probs won't be doing any thing else till I get those done. Anyway.. On to the fic! Enjoy!

"Dammit!"

Bucky's frustrated outburst, along with something metal clattering against his garage floor is audible as I walk up his long, wide, driveway. Listening to him grumble aggressively about "a piece of shit black lil mercedes" makes me chuckle heartily to my self. Expletives about the damage I staged seems to be most common, along with a couple grunts from an unknown task clearly exerting his strength.

The way his breath puffs out entices the introverted slut in me to visualize him underneath me in immense bliss while I ride his dick to my satisfaction, those heavy huffing pants spilling from his lips. Hopefully today's the day I make my dreams come true.

Looking left to right, I notice there's not a soul outside at the moment. That just means step one of my plan is already in action. The dainty diamond rolex on my wrist confirms it's 5pm. Right on time to get fucked and filled with Bucky's nut till it leaks in my panties. Mmmm... Can't wait to rub em all over my pussy later; his milky cream acting as lube while I make myself cum so fuckin hard. I'm lickin my full heart shaped lips in anticipation while plottin on this poor unsuspectin man.

Passing by his new deep blue jaguar, I run a finger along its pristine paint job as I spot Bucky on a creeper underneath my Mercedes. He takes that moment to run a hand through his fresh cut dark locks while wishing it absolute death. It's impossible not to feel a smidge of guilt at the purposeful trouble Bucky's going through at the moment but if everything goes my way, I fully intend to make it up to him by the end of the evening. Shit, hopefully multiple times this evening. It's outta my power not to smile wide at the way my soakin wet pussy flutters at the thought.

Leaning against his ride with palms flat on the hood, I eye fuck my prize thoroughly. Daddy looks so fucking good in his fitted navy blue tee and snug black jeans on his back, his muscled thighs spread wide. The bottom of his shirt lifts a bit to reveal a peek of his firm, incredibly toned tummy as his hips jut upwards. Dark brown boots spread apart wide when he repositions himself, and the fat ass bulge in between his legs grabs my attention real quick.

I'm so fuckin horny just from starin at Bucky, that I gotta squeeze my thighs together for just even a hint of pressure on my pulsating center. My shorts are past drenched where they rest sticky against me. The arousal drippin out plasters my brown thick thighs as my needy little cunt clenches rapidly around nothing. My nipples are so fuckin hard from lightly rubbing against the extremely transparent fit I chose just for him.

"Hey Buck, whats the progress on my baby?" I finally grab his attention as I drum my glossy short jet black nails on the hood of his car.

The wheels on the creeper squeak as he rolls from underneath the source of his current troubles and stands. His eyes focus on the black grime on his hands and he heads to the small sink in the corner of his garage as he responds.

"Woman, I don't know how you manage to damage something on this vehicle every week but it's gotta stop. I'm startin think you just like to come see me."

"Well why not? You're a sight for sore eyes, good lookin."

He dries his hands while laughing at my brazeness and, as always, not taking my corny flirtation serious.

"Boy, you laughin like I won't fuck the daylights outta you right fuckin now."

That flippant response however has him spinnin on his heels to face me. Bucky's vibrant blue eyes grow to orbs and he's rendered speechless as he thoroughly takes in my damn near non existent ensemble. This man is staring at the swell of my perky titties so intently that I know step 2 of my plan is gonna be a piece of cake and I really hope its not my imagination when noticing a twitch from the protrusion in his black jeans.

Dropping the cloth in his hands to the garage floor, he takes long strides till he's standing outside in front of me. His pretty pink lips part and close multiple times as he struggles to speak as he gazes at my nipple covers. Wonder what Daddy's next moves gonna be..

Bucky doesn't say anything at first; but the way he lustfully takes me in gives me goose bumps. His big hands reach around me to grip under my ass and hoist me up against his body. I don't hesitate to wrap my arms and legs around him as he walks us to his parked car, layin me across the warm hood.

"Damn sweetheart, where you plan on goin lookin like this?" Bucky asks, eyes still darting around my body as he presses his clothed hard dick between my legs. The pressure of him against my pussy feels heavy, has my clit thumpin wildly and I'm grindin back without a thought.

"I have a date tonight." I respond breathlessly and that makes his light crystal cerulean eyes snap to mine.

"That right? What're you doin underneath me then, woman? Huh? A little pregame?" He teases, leaning in so close that our lips almost touch.

I shake my head at his questioning as my cheeks heat up from his words. Still, its difficult to feel true embarrasment as his hands glide slowly over my frame, leaving a trail of warmth that makes me press into his palms. Bucky's touch and proximity stuns me a bit, makes my brain fuzzy and pussy clench for him ferally. The small sexy smirk playin at the corner of his lips turns me on just as much as him dry humping me in broad daylight ontop his brand new ride.

"Huh y/n? Is that it? Did you come to me first cause you wanna cum for me first?" He chuckles at me.

Leaning down, his soft lips pecks light kisses from the cheek to my ear. His fingertips skim under my tight bottoms, so dangerously close to my clit as he nips and sucks at my skin. I'm moaning and nodding my assent as I tug him to press against me firmly by the loops of his jeans.

"Fuuuuck.. Lemme feel you then pretty girl."

Bucky's fingers finally dragging across my throbbing button lightly, makin me damn near seize underneath him. I do nothing to mask the loud gasp of his name as the pleasure from just one swipe has me squeezin my eyes shut and grabbin at the top of his jeans in a death grip.

"Damn, my girl is soooo sensitive."

His low groan at my ear makes my soaked pussy flutter quicker and I can feel myself becoming desperate from his teasing touches. The sensation of one hands roaming up my body to gently squeeze over my left tit as the other sweeps across my pussy has me choking on my breaths with a heaving chest. Bucky lifts his head to watch me as he slowly traces circles around my clit, never fully pressing down on it the way I crave.

"Pleeease Buck, pleeeeease." I beg for him to give me more as my incessant yanking on his bottoms pops open the silver button and zipper.

A surprising thanks to the foregoing of underwear is definitely due because I'm then gifted with fattest dick I've ever seen. He's so. Fucking. Perfect. Almost pretty if it werent how girthy his shaft is, the angry flushed head of his dick drooling an abundant stream of precum. I easily notice the weight of him prevents it from slapping upwards; the thick tip of his cock points at my slippery slit. I don't stop pulling at him, humping the tip of his dick while I continue to plead for him to give me what I want most.

"Okay, honey, okay. I'll give you what you want. But lemme take you inside- haaaah, ooooh fuuuuck.."

Our moans mingle togther as one of my harsh tugs forces a few inches of his dick inside my awaiting core. Bucky eyes are wide as saucers as he stares where we connect with an open mouth. His breathing is harsh and loud; strong chest rising and falling rapidly as he quickly grabs my hands from his jeans. I immediately grieve as his touch leaves my tit and clit but my pussy involuntarily clutches at the head of his dick as he pins my wrist to the hood of his car.

"Jesus, woman. Mmmm.. Dammit, aaaaahhh fu- you couldn't wait till I got you inside?"

"Noooo, James. Want you, NEED you noooow. Please Jaaames, pleeease!" I don't notice the volume of my voice rising as I start to lose my fuckin mind.

Bucky's gaze is piercing but frantic, darting from the small puddle forming underneath me on the hood of his car to the way I'm hangin off the end of his dick. But I think it's the way I whine his first name that breaks his resolve. He briefly halts pinnin me down to put my legs over his shoulders. He's then scooping my wrists together in one hand and covering my mouth with the other.

"Fine, pretty girl, don't say I didn't warn your bad ass. Tried to give us some privacy. Now you gonna take this dick no matter what."

The first pump of his cock has him slidin in halfway, the river spilling from me aiding his stroke in. Still, his fat ass shaft splits my delicate walls apart swiftly, the intense pressure has my glossy y/e/c eyes and lined lips opening wide. I squeal loudly gainst his palm, not expecting Bucky to already be sitting in my guts even though he wasn't all the way in yet. WTF..

"Fuuck, sobigBuck, you're HUGE." I whimper, peering up at him with vacant eyes. He leers down at me with a knowing smile.

"Yeah, but my girls gonna have to get used to it huh?" He asks, starting fuck up into my gushy slit.

I don't mean to yank at his hold on my wrists but his next 2 thrust are so fuckin deep. My resistance doesn't free me, though it pulls him off balance and he slides in to the hilt. The tension in my tummy deepens as I feel his cock diggin into my pussy in places no man's ever reached. If it weren't for the hand cupping my mouth, I'm sure the scream I let out would be deafening. Bucky moans out praises as I squeeze my eyes shut tight and try my best to breathe through my nose.

"You're doing so damn-ohshit- weeeeell honey, takin me sooooo good. Mmmmmm.. Chokin the fuckin life out my dick y/n. Not s-sure how long I can last in this hot, tight ass, little pussy, sweetheart. Fuuuuuuck.. Keep being a good girl for me, try to keep quiet okay?"

I can feel Bucky's stare on me even through my close lids, so I nod my compliance. In reality, I pray to god that i dont scream out 'Daddy' for the whole neighborhood to hear while he's dickin me down.

He takes his hands from my wrists and mouth, sliding them down for a quick grab of my plump brown breasts, then to grip at my waist. The pull of his dick slowly slidin out then swiftly plunging back inside has me panting loudly with furrowed brows. I have to cover my own mouth this time, both hands pressed against my lips as he repeats the motion of his hips over and over until he's fucking me in a unhurried but deeply precise rhythm.

"Ohmygod James! Sogood-you'resogood! Don't stop, pleeeease d-don'tstop!" My muffled cries are crazed as he finally stuffs me with dick.

"I won't, honey, won't stop till you cream all over me. Wouldn't dreeeeam of it, baby. Can't stop till you cum on my cock. Fuuuuuck you feel like heaven baby, pussy got me ready to nut an we jus started. Haaah oooh God, sooo good, need you to cum first, y/n."

I'm already covered in perspiration as the breeze races across my nut brown skin and cools me down. Its about the only thing I notice, sounds of the passing cars and chirping birds drowned out by the loud rushing in my ears as Bucky thoroughly fucks the shit outta me. The pleasure swirling in my tummy is so fucking taut, and I know when I cum it's gonna be fucking spectacular.

His unrushed pace begins to speed up, the impact of him pumpin into me rocks his car back and forth as his grunts become more frequent. My knees tremble near his ears from the onslaught, from hearing how good Daddy feels because of me.

He looks just as delicious as he sounds, his body so fuckin tense as I witness how he loses himself in my pussy. Normally his light blue eyes are what stun me, but the dark pupils so damn dilated captivate me into a trance. I stare back helplessly as he gives me the best dick I ever had.

The hands holding my waist clutch snugly, usin his leverage to help fuck me a bit faster. His dick twitches against my walls heavily as Bucky groans out his pleasure, grunts out how he can't take the creamy ring getting thicker around the base of his dick.

"Can I-mmmmohfuckohfuckhoney-can I kiss you sweetheart?"

The sugary sweet question is sudden and takes me aback, is almost funny considering how severely deep he's seated inside of me. I might've even laughed if I wasn't keening from the amazing dick I was currently receiving. Too overwhelmed to answer, I release my mouth and clasp my fingers behind his neck, pulling his face to mine.

Bucky presses a quick kiss to my mouth with soft pink lips. Then another. And one more, the third one deepening with passion. It doesnt matter that he slows the pace of his hips to a crawl again; he continues to grind and dig so deep that his cock curves and hits a firm but gummy spot inside my cunt. It's too damn difficult after that to keep in sync of his lips as he drags his spasming dick across my g spot with too much fuckin accuracy. My sobs against his mouth doesn't stop Bucky's assault on my body. I know what time it is when his hand leaves my waist to press a firm quick circle directly on my clit.

"Mmmmm, pussy f-feels too fuckin 'mazin y/n, sooooclosebaby. I'm gonna buss babygirl, gonna fill that pretty lil kitty to the brim. Need you to cum too, honey. Pleeease." Bucky pleas with me in between messy damp kisses.

I'm way too near my end for full sentences, but from the way I mewl 'James' repeatedly, he seems to get the point. His grinding comes to an abrupt halt before he pulls his dick all the way out and vigorously stabs back in over and over, smashing my g spot and flicking my clit ferociously.

"Bu- haaaah! Aaaahh fuuuu- James! Ohgo- mmmm.. Uhn, uhn, uhn, JAMES!"

My orgasm is almost incomprehensible at first, the pressure in my gut exploding, spiraling outta control and I squirt fiercely against his torso. Warm lips engulf my mouth, sucking and nipping, probably to hush the animalistic noises coming from me as I quiver and shake underneathe him. Its like an avalanche of sensation, so intense I have to grip and claw at his shoulders to ground myself.

"Ahhhh, fuck y/n! Can't take feelin you gush my dick like this. Gonna give this pussy just what she needs honey, fucking cummin sweetheart! Ahhhh shiiiit! Sogood, sogood! Fuuuuuck!" Bucky huffs and puffs his pleasure against my swollen lips.

His fist slams down against his hood, ceasing his rubbing on my pulsating clit as he spurts deep inside my trembling cunt. I can't help but to soak in his grunts of love and praises to me.

Baring his weight on me to keep me in place, he splashes another lava hot jet of cum against the walls of my pussy and it feels too fucking good to feel James Buchanan Barnes fill me up with savagely massive load of cum. I watch him quake as he erupts 2 more explosive sprays inside before pulling out, shooting the last of his cum on my cocoa brown slit.

"You planned this.." Bucky accuses, not wasting any time to catche his breath. His eyes planted where he smears his thick cream allover my pussy as he waits patiently for my response. Daddy doesn't stop till my pussy's covered in his cum. Only then does slip my legs from his shoulders, my snug bottoms back in place and his still very hard dick back into his jeans.

Tired eyes meet my heavy-lidded gaze but I take a few deep breaths to steady myself before I answer. My pussy is already sore but fluttering for more as I bask underneath Bucky's muscular frame.

"I did. Came up with a mastermind plan." I say proudly, my own smirk comin out to tease him.

"Oh really? And how many steps did this 'mastermind plan' have?" He asks with a raised brow, as he zips and buttons his pants

"Just 4." I answer shortly, knees comin up to squeeze at his hips and rub my hands down his abs to the loops of his jeans.

"Which were?"

"Well step 1, purposefully fuck up my car so-"

Bucky cuts me off mid sentence, leaning down so the tip of his nose almost touches mine. His hands grip each of my thighs firmly as quickly yanks me flush against his body and speaks in a low growl.

"I knew it woman! I've been wasting my fuckin time workin on your goddamn car for weeks and- You know what? Talk is cheap; time to pay the piper, honey."

#bucky x reader #black reader #daddy k!nk #black fanfiction #all readers #smut #bucky x female reader #bucky x black!reader #poc reader #creamp!e #public exposure #public fun #dirty talk #dom bucky barnes

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norrisleclercf1 · 2 years

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Carbon Copy

Pairing: Dad!Max

Request: Yes / No

Warnings: None

Synopsis: Your daughter was finally turning 7, which meant Max was finally able to get her that kart.

Max was always meant to be a girl dad; you just knew it in your soul. When you told him you were having a baby girl, he cried. It calls it the best day of his life, 1st to winning the world championship and marrying you.

So when you gave birth, he was always there and learned everything he needed to; he loved shopping for baby clothes more than you; he even had Red Bull make a newborn rave suit a copy of his rave suit, except it had in small letters; Verstappen Girl.

You snorted with laughter hours after birth when he dressed her in it and posted the picture. Of course, fans and everyone loved it, but the guys picked on him whenever they could. Max couldn't want her to grow up, he loved his baby girl, but he tried to teach her the best thing in his life; racing.

You weren't sure about teaching her how to kart, but max promised to wait till she was at the average age; of 7 years old. To him, that was the average age, to you? Mama Bear wanted to come out whenever he brought it up.

Trust was a big thing, and you trusted Max with your life and hers, so you agreed, and he kissed you deeply before running off to look for a kart to purchase. So when Aletta’s 7th birthday rolled around, everyone was there.

Family, Friends, and even the F1 racers made time to come and wish the young Verstappen a Happy Birthday. So when it came to presents, you were sure Max would pull out a Kart and start teaching her, but gifts came and opened, and still no Kart.

You can see that Aletta is looking around for more but stops seeing Gabriel, Charles's son, and runs to him. Gabriel was two years older than Aletta and liked showing off his kart to her since he's been driving one from a younger age.

“I still don't have one yet, Gabe,” Aletta whines, making the boy smile and pat her head.

“That's okay, Etta; maybe your papa is waiting for you to be older.” The boy attempts to comfort her, but you can tell from how she hangs her head and stalks off.

With a shake of your head, you see Charles, Max, Pierre, Lando, and Checo in a small circle talking in hush voices.

“Want to explain why my baby hasn't gotten the Kart she wanted too bad, and her father promised her?” Your voice was tight, anger simmering in your veins that Max promised her something and didn't own up to it.

“Lief.” Max turns smiling but stops seeing your displeasure and stance.

“Good luck.” Checo pats his back and rushes off, the others following away from the angry wife and mother.

“Well?” You ask, and Max straightens and sighs, rubbing his neck.

“The kart was supposed to be here today, but it won't show up till later, and I want it to be a surprise.” As he explains, your anger fizzes out, and you lean up, kissing his cheek.

“Max, you need to explain it to her then; she's hurt because she thinks the kart isn't coming,” you explain and see the pained expression cross his face.

Max wanted to be the best parent to his daughter. He supported her, loved her, and ensured her thoughts and emotions were respected. So hearing that he let her down was worse than anything in the world.

“I'll be back.” He kisses your mouth and goes to find his baby girl. He knew exactly where to find her, his trophy room.

“Kleine kampioen.” He knocks on the door and makes it. Open to see her staring at his first ever world championship, the image of him kneeling next to his car, head on the wheel.

“You lied, papa.” She whispers, and Max feels his heart hurt before sitting beside her.

“Baby, I didn't lie; you are getting a kart, but it won't arrive till the end of the week.” She turns his own eyes, looking right back at him.

“Really? I'm getting one?” She stands up, her smile covering her entire face.

“Yes, Kleine kampioen, here.” Pulling his phone out, he shows her the picture of it. The squeal she lets out makes his ears pop; before he knows it, she bolts down the hallway and back outside.

“Mommy!Mommy! Mommy! I'm getting a kart!” She screams, having everyone laugh as she collides with you while jumping and running around before telling Gabriel.

The rest of the party went off without a problem, but Aletta couldn't wait for her kart and kept telling everyone who would listen. It was another week before the kart finally arrived; you didn't know until you heard laughter and the hum of an engine.

You pull on your robe and make your way to the backyard, where Gabriel, Charles, Max, and Aletta stand around your daughter's kart.

“Papa, it looks like Uncle Max’s first Red Bull.” Gabriel stares in awe at the kart, which has Charles groan at the memories of that damn car coming from behind him more times than he could count.

“Great, bring back that demon of a car, why don't you.” But Max smiles at his daughter, trying to figure it out.

You step back, letting them have their moment and see it was only 7:30 in the morning and decide to start breakfast, knowing the others were probably on their way.

“Papa.....I don't know how to drive it.” Aletta whispers overwhelmed. It was a simple one, nothing like the two adults, but Aletta had never been in one, and to anyone at seven, something new would overwhelm anyone.

“That's why im here, to teach you how to drive it.” He kneels and kisses her cheek.

“Yeah, Etta, that's why papa and I are here too! But mainly Uncle Max.” Gabriel beams but stops seeing his uncle raise an eyebrow at the boy.

“Mainly me, teaching you.” Max points out, which makes his fighter nod her head.

When she woke this morning, her papa had her dressed in a minor race suit, a copy of Max’s from his younger days.

“Here.” Max picks up a helmet, a large number 1 splashed on the back and helps her put it on.

“It's uncomfortable papa.” Aletta reaches up to take it off, but Max’s larger hands stop her small ones.

“I know it's uncomfortable, baby, but you'll get used to it. It's supposed to be tight on your head; if it weren't, Mommy would kill me.” Making his daughter laugh, she climbs into the kart and sits down. Gabriel fires it up ad drives off, and Charles follows him on his kart.

Max sits down in his and fires it up before pulling up to Aletta. “Alright, this right here is your break and gas. This button here turns it on. Now, press on the break and push the button.” Max instructs her, and she does as he says.

He couldn't see her face, but he could tell from her eyes that she was probably the happiest little girl. It took a while, but she finally got a hold of the gas and break.

Aletta was following behind her father as you watched them from the kitchen balcony; you could tell she wanted to go but couldn't, but Max was keeping a tight reign on her driving speed.

An hour passed before you stepped around the counter and onto the balcony seeing Max and Charles showing Aletta how to take care of her kart and the rules. She wasn't allowed to drive without one of them, never take the kart into the street, and don't go over a certain speed until they thought she was ready.

“Liefje, it's time for breakfast,” you call down, having the four faces look up and nod, and you see Pierre, Lando, Daniel, and the others start to arrive, and you shake your head seeing Aletta rush to Lando and showing off her kart.

They soon make their way upstairs and to the balcony as you listen and watch everyone share their memories and knowledge with the two kids at the table, even videos of their old karting days.

“I can't wait to win the F1 Championship!” Aletta yells making everyone go silent before laughing, but Max doesn't laugh.

“You can do it baby.” He smiles and kisses the top of her head.

“And we'll always support you.” You add on having Max smile and kiss you before Aletta nods but Gabriel snorts.

“You’ll have to beat me first Etta.” Gabriel yells back setting off a new round of laughs.

You couldn't wait for the future of F1.

Tags: @miniminescapist @vita-di-moda

#f1 #f1 x reader #f1 x y/n #formula 1 #f1 fandom #f1 imagine #f1 2022 #f1 scenario #formula one #max verstappen imagine #max imagine #max verstappen #dad!max

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meimi-haneoka · 6 months

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Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card Chapter 79: Comments + JP-ENG translation differences

Welcome back to our monthly appointment, CCS fans! This chapter comes right after this month's full moon, the Hunter Moon! (lol yes I will feature the name of the relative full moon till the end of the story). And speaking of the end of the story, I will start this analysis and translation post from the end of the chapter, where I found the confirmation to the rumour that had been going on for hours before the official release on Comic Days:

yes, dear readers, this is not a drill, Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card Arc will end with chapter 80, after 7 years of serialization! 🎉✨ When *the last chapter* is announced, there's no turning back! No more sudden announcements of extensions! 🥹 But at the moment of writing this post, no mentions have been given about any "epilogue" or extra chapters that might be serialized in the upcoming months leading to the big release of volume 16 on April 1st!

On the translation side, I have to sigh in relief because no major misunderstandings happened in the ENG version, just some minor inaccuracies! I was kinda scared because this chapter is pretty important and complex in itself.

And let me say that what happened in this chapter 79 definitely marks the end of the climax, so I can totally see it ending in next chapter. The chapter tackled some very important thematics regarding the presence of "evil" in this series, that I will talk about extensively in my analysis.

The announcement today made me already a bit nostalgic and sad, but I want to strive hard to accompany myself and all of you towards the end of this arc with excitement and a smile, therefore I won't let myself be prey of the sadness yet and introduce you immediately to the gif of this month, because there's a lot we need to talk about and analyze and we can't waste time!!

This is entirely dedicated to our protagonist and heroine Sakura-chan, because damn, she really slayed this chapter!!! Under the cut to see what miracles she made happen!

The Color Page

My dear readers, after years of countless pleas on my social media, after being let down month after month, CLAMP FINALLY GRANTED ME A COLOR PAGE SOLELY DEDICATED TO KAITO AND AKIHO TOGETHER ON THE SECOND-TO-LAST CHAPTER!! Yaaaay!! Excuse me while I celebrate this event here in my little corner, especially after having a rough month! 🎉🎉🎉 I hope my followers thought of me when they saw it? Like "finally she'll stop asking for it" (breaking news, I'll keep asking for more even after the series is over) 😂 It took them 79 chapters to do so and honestly I'm laughing because....yes, I admit it, I expected another vibe for such an important color page coming after such an important emotional scene in chapter 78, but honestly the first thing I thought when I saw it was "....they had to wait 79 chapters for this? 😧" 😂because it's very very "regular", I think it would've been ok for this to come out long ago. LOL I'm being brutally honest here, I hope no one gets offended, especially because that pet peeve aside, OF COURSE I love this precious color page to bits, and I know under its "normalcy", its got a very important meaning to the both of them.

Akiho and Kaito are depicted together clearly during one of their travels....but the question is, is this from the past? Or the near future? I'd daresay they look the same age they are now, so this might probably be a foreshadowing for the future...? They'll keep travelling the world? But seeing the content of the chapter, this might also be just a call-back to their memories together and everything that they experienced during those travels, tightening their bond. Travelling the world is, after all, really their thing, their element. I really like Kaito's expression, with his usual smile that almost turns into a smirk, he gives off a vibe of being finally free to express his emotions. He looks carefree, and that's really something for him. Akiho, on the other hand, is always so much more expressive than him and you can literally feel the joy and excitement emanating from her delighted expression. Travelling with him makes her happy, so yes, should this be what awaits them in the finale, it's fine by me as long as they're happy (I'm rooting for the other option though, the "stay in Tomoeda with your newfound support network" route).

But as you know, I always have to analyze the color pages a bit deeper, especially when they're about these two. And since I had to keep myself distracted, I made a bit of research. Other than the "travelling" vibe, this illustration gives off also kind of a "vintage" vibe (which is another strong element to Akiho and Kaito). It seems Akiho is dressed in a sleeveless coat with cape and wearing a bonnet fully inspired by those worn by children in the second half of the 1800s, in the Victorian era.

(pic courtesy of Etsy) This is a model from 1896, for example. When I pinpointed the period, I immediately thought "uh, the Victorian era is also the period when Alice in Wonderland came out", although that was more towards the 1860s. I found it really interesting and a nice touch for this illustration with a retro flavor (the suitcase and purse also look kinda vintage).

But another thing that immediately caught my eyes were those cute birds landing on Kaito's shoulder and Akiho's bonnet. I immediately tried to look what kind of birds they are, and it seems like they could really be eastern bluebirds, typical of North America. Searching further, I found out that in several cultures bluebirds are harbinger of happiness and symbols of hope. I couldn't honestly have thought for a more fitting symbolism, for these two. Especially cause birds often are associated with an imagery of freedom, and this is something else that these two need, after being hunted by evil people for so long. They really do look free, in this color page. Also, the presence of the birds in this color page immediately brought me back to the color page of chapter 62, where we can see baby Kaito in a wintery setting, sitting on a lamppost, extending his little hand to a swallow coming to him. Swallows are a symbol of hope and bring a message of "spring is coming", and continuing from that message of hope, of "spring is coming for you too", we can finally see here in chapter 79 our Kaito with his true happiness, symbolized literally by the birds most associated with happiness. Another thing that caught my eyes is of course the lily depicted on the cover of the book Akiho is holding, a nice callback to Akiho's mother and Kaito's torment, Lilie. She's always going to be with them ❤️

The Japanese editorial text over the picture is an excerpt of what Momo was musing to herself in chapter 39, while imagining to talk to Kaito: "You traveled with her, and spent time together with her". I think CLAMP chose to feature this line to indicate an important thing that will be restored at the end of this chapter.

Everyone Is Doing Their Best

The chapter starts with a panel showing some light coming off Yukito's house, and we find out that even Touya fainted, exhausted by the effort to keep time stopped as much as possible. Ruby Moon is cradling his head on her lap trying to assist him and "recharge" his magical power, in hope to be able to maintain time "stopped" a bit more. In fact, if you notice, the "black covering" that symbolizes the time-stopping spell isn't completely destroyed yet, but only riddled with "holes", an indication that the spell is still somehow active, even if feebly. I imagine this might "slow down" the attacks, which are still coming but probably not at full speed like they would if the spell came undone completely. I have to point out immediately a mild inaccuracy in the ENG version, that I want to specify in order to dispel extreme theories before they're born: no, Ruby Moon didn't give up all of her powers to Touya, the verb used here is simply 補える, "can replenish (your magic)", not "give all".

Touya doesn't lose his sense of humor even in a dire situation like this, and comments sarcastically "What are you, a battery?", a clear recall to the whole "batteries" matter that came out in the un-rewritten world. Touya isn't supposed to remember about that, and he probably doesn't, but this is just a way from CLAMP to show that even in a situation where memories have been rewritten, some things will be unconsciously said again, because they're just meant to happen.

Ruby Moon calls for assistance from her "brother" Spinel Sun (love how even in these true forms, she still calls him "Suppy"), whom rejects the appellative of "battery" but agrees to give her a hand with "recharging" Touya to keep the spell up a bit longer. Everyone looks outside, only one thought in their minds, which is voiced clearly by a serious Tomoyo: "Sakura and everyone else are fighting with all they've got". I have to point out a typo here in the Japanese version (nothing serious, it can happen and will be surely fixed in the tankobon version): Tomoyo calls Sakura "Sakura-san". I loved the "sparkles" around Tomoyo's eyes, as if indicating that her extraordinary intuition is "at work" and just telling her that, even if they can't see them because they're quite far away, Sakura and the others are doing whatever they can to stop these attacks. And the fact they can see the attacks, but not their friends and their condition, must be really hard to witness, for all of them. But no worries, there's Touya nii-chan who's always ready to lighten the mood even in this challenging situation, joking that "If they don't get back before the curfew, they won't be getting their snacks tomorrow!". Here the ENG adds "squirt" to make Touya refer specifically to Sakura, but truth to be told, in the JP there's no subject, so he might be referring to everyone. It's amazing how he's able to keep his spirit up and be sarcastic even in this situation....he really believes in his little sister so much!

I'll Make Them Forget About You

Back where our heroes are, the attacks keep coming relentlessly, countered by Syaoran, Yue and Kero in tandem. Sakura reflects on the fact that the only transparent Cards she's got left are these two she's holding in her hands (Time and Rewind) and Flight. This statement leads me to believe that when Record transformed into that crystal that entered her, that meant that the Card completed its duty and disappeared inside of her. But Sakura isn't worried at all, because she knows that she can create more Cards. Yessss, this development that I've been anticipating since quite some time is finally here! ✨🎉 Sakura seems to finally have a concrete plan, but before proceeding, she needs to ascertain something. She asks directly to Kaito: "The people who are using these spells were trying to hurt you, right?". Kaito, with a pensive face, answers affirmatively.

But it's when Sakura asks again "Were they trying to hurt Akiho too?" that his expression turns really painful, the background after him portraying well his raging emotions and, while Mokona-sensei chose to leave Akiho hidden by Kaito's black wings in the previous panels, now she finally shows how both she and Kaito are holding onto eachother, while our boy answers with a "...Yes" dripping with sorrow. It really squeezed my heart with pain, this scene. Because as long as Sakura was asking about him, his expression was pensive but almost as if it's something he's used to, that didn't shake him too much. But when Sakura mentions Akiho, god, that wrecked him. Any mention, any reminescence of what those bastards did to her and how they were chasing after her to put their filthy hands on her again wrecks him even now, and it's like Mokona with her visual skills is showing how Kaito seems to be holding Akiho a little bit tighter, while he answers Sakura's question. I also have to point out something that I had noticed already from last chapter, but a panel tricked me into believing I was just seeing things: CLAMP here use a dark screentone for Kaito's eyes, that he never had before (actually, no other character in CCS got this effect in their eyes). This effect will be used on him for the entire chapter.

And it seems like it's the very same screentone that was used for the dragon. I think this might be an indication that the wings aren't the only reminescence of his dragon appearance!

Sakura shows once again an incredible empathy that allows her to go right to the heart of the issue without investigating much. If Kaito rewrote an entire world, and if it's true that Akiho in the previous world didn't have all the love and familiar support she's got now, it means that she was probably in danger too. And seeing as these people are attacking them now because they freed Kaito from his "punishment", Sakura doesn't really need much to make 2+2 and understand the situation. Sakura believes in Akiho, therefore she believes in Kaito too, and knows that if he came to this point it's because they were in a desperate and dangerous situation.

Showing an incredible insight, Sakura shocks both Kaito and Akiho by asking:

Sakura, JP: "In that case, can I make those people forget about you both?"

Because our girl needs to make sure that the plan she came up with won't have any undesired consequences. But most importantly, she needs to have their consent. She reiterates this once again, actually she will make sure to ask Kaito and Akiho's consent 3 times in total. She says: JP, lit. "If going back to before the world was rewritten will put you through hardships once again, then, can I just make them forget?" Kaito is even more shocked, because he finally understands Sakura's intent. A generous, selfless intent born from a loving heart. Our girl wants to make sure that these two will be safe and sound once she fixes this situation. She can't take risks, because their happiness is all she's really caring for right now. And in his shocked expression, I can also see some kind of "omg YES, PLEASE" vibe. Because probably, having those terrible people forgetting all about them is everything he ever wished, but couldn't achieve. And I think it's really funny how we berated Kaito so much in the past chapters for making Akiho and the others forget facts that happened before and forgetting about him, but here Sakura just takes "inspiration" from him and actually decides to use that same "trick" in the right way. Because it's not fair that it should be them, the abused people, to forget about their most important person, in order to achieve a happy life for at least one of them. It isn't fair and it isn't right that Kaito was driven into making all the mess that he made, pushed by desperation. The abusers, that clan and Association of magicians, should be the ones forgetting.

But this is Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card's finale, and Sakura definitely hasn't finished with being amazing yet, she actually just started. Her very strong power at this point allows her not only to see things that were difficult before, but also to connect the dots more easily thanks to that renowned instinct that I've always talked to you about, and that she learned to finally listen to.

As if she were seeing through him with X-rays, she confidently affirms that there's a book inside of him, a white book where you can inscribe magic on. And she also knows that that same book was inside Akiho, once. I guess this might be even coming from past memories of the unrewritten world (do you remember when, before the play started, Sakura said that she could feel something inside Akiho?). Akiho of course is shocked to hear that, and from her expression you can almost feel the chill that went down her spine in that moment. Sakura affirms that this book knows both Akiho and Kaito (thanks to the fact that it was inside both of them - something that I've always found painfully heartbreaking but also quite moving, for my ship), and it's got a very strong power inside of it. These will be two crucial things for Sakura's plan. In fact, our heroine is hellbent in attempting something pretty arduous: utilizing that artifact's power to create a new Card. For impartiality, I have to point out that the ENG added (completely on their whim) a "you, her special person" that isn't there in the JP version! Of course it's all the better for me, since they repeat (finally with the right adjective) that Kaito is Akiho's special person, but it's kinda funny that they messed it up so much in the previous chapters, and now they're adding it where there isn't any mention of it!

Sakura will be using a tool that knows the both of them, therefore she is sure that her plan will succeed, because the Card will know what it will need to erase. Sakura asks for Kaito and Akiho's agreement one last time. After hearing how those people wanted to hurt them both and even implanted the same magical artifact inside of her, Akiho is quite resolute and doesn't have any doubt: on with the wiping off! It doesn't matter who those people are, they've tried to harm her most important person and her too, so she doesn't really seem to give a damn about proceeding with this plan. Kaito, on the other hand, seems to be giving a more lackluster affirmative reply, but it's not that he's uncertain: he's just still riddled with guilt for all the mess that he's done, and he's probably realizing that now Sakura will need to put herself on the line in order to fix this and protect both of them, hence his sad face.

Still surfing the confidence wave, Sakura guesses that once those people have forgotten about Akiho and Kaito, then the magic arrows will stop too, and Kaito confirms that: forgetting about the person who had the Seal of D enforced on him will be equal to "undo" both the activation of the Seal itself (when Kaito removed the book from Akiho) and also the rescission of it (what Sakura did when she freed Kaito from the cage). This will therefore stop the arrows too, because the Seal wouldn't have been triggered in the first place. However, Kaito warns her that, although time is still barely "stopped" (because the time-stopping spell is still weakly on), it's necessary an enormous amount of power in order to do what Sakura wants to do. I have to point out another inaccuracy in the ENG translation in this part, which makes Kaito say "before things could get worse" and I have the feeling they misunderstood the word 辛うじて, "barely" or "narrowly", which is also written with the kanji of 辛い, "hard" or "tough". So Kaito isn't saying "before things could get worse" but actually meaning "although time is barely stopped".

Sakura doesn't seem to be scared by Kaito's warning, and activates her wand without a second thought, and immediately we can see that her task wil NOT be easy, as she can feel the strain almost right away.

Here we go with another inaccuracy of the ENG translation:

Sakura, ENG: "Great book, please show yourself! My power alone won't be enough...!" Sakura, JP: "The book....doesn't want to come out. (it's too difficult to pull it out) with just my power..."

Basically, Sakura isn't begging the book to "show itself", she's actually actively trying to pull it out of Kaito, and she's aware that it's opposing a lot of resistance, and her power alone isn't enough to take this damn book out. Sakura refuses to give up, because everyone else is doing their best too. Yes, everyone else.

And that's when CLAMP decided to bring us a big surprise for this finale.

A pair of hands seem to be appearing next to Sakura's, as if a spirit is hugging her from behind. We can see the famous fan that we learned to recognize so well ever since her first appearance in Movie 1. Sakura feels immediately the same magical power of Syaoran surrounding her, and with her instinct she finally recognizes her: it's Syaoran's mother, YELAN!!! We can see her, sweating and all, in her sacred chinese pavilion, lending her power to help in this difficult task.

What a great, welcome surprise for this finale!! You might have heard me saying on Twitter that Clear Card is really a celebration of motherhood, with this constant presence of mothers and mother figures who try to help these kids growing up without removing their right to choose for themselves. And since Yelan is the only mother figure who can concretely help Sakura in this moment, with her immense power, I really loved to see how this woman didn't hesitate to assist her future daugher in law. For any SyaoSaku fan, this scene here is a huge thing. We have seen in the anime how Yelan doted on Sakura ever since she met her in Movie 1, even before her own son realized his feelings for this girl. Yelan and Sakura haven't met in the manga yet (and hello, CLAMP, now this is a good chance for letting that happen, after the madness is over), but the woman didn't hesitate a moment to lend her power. I can really imagine how along these two will get, in the future. ❤️

Sakura thanks her aloud, while her eyes show that she's really really tired. Yelan's assistance is finally effective in summoning the artifact book out of Kaito, and we see again those countless book pages that we saw both when Akiho used to go "berserk", and also in the most heartbreaking scene of chapter 70. Kaito, still holding onto a worried Akiho, seems to suffer physically from this removal, and I can't understand if it's because removing something magical from inside is naturally painful (we've been shown something like that before, Syaoran crouching to the ground in pain while the Sakura Cards were being removed from inside of him) OR if the removal of the artifact also triggered his poor health conditions in which we left him, before he disappeared in chapter 70.

Sakura tries with all she's got and finally manages to turn the artifact into its "true form": a book filled with countless of spells written in strange magic runes.

You have spotted it, right? ☝️ I haven't seen many fandom reactions yet, but I guess this "cameo" made more than one person scream: it's Fay D. Fluorite's tattoo, yes! This page of the "book" is probably describing the procedure to cast that tattoo (which was also a kind of "seal", if I remember correctly). So that spells exists in this CCS world too! 😅 The magic Sakura is weaving starts "working" on the book, literally removing the spells from its pages and turning them back to their original form of magical books (remember that the Squids used to say that they would inscribe "magic books" and their power onto Akiho?).

Then, solemnly, we hear probably for the last time ever the magical incantation that accompanied us in the beginning of the story, used by Sakura to secure the strange manifestations of power into a transparent Card:

ENG: "Force without master, heed the call of my Staff of Dreams and become my power! SECURE!"

The countless of books and all this tremendous amount of power get secured into the birth of a new Card: BLANK!!!

Blank got the human appearance of Akiho, but also the protective wings of Kaito. The girl is holding a book (of course, how perfect for her) which is the representation of the artifact that was inside both Kaito and Akiho. This card is really so meaningful for someone like me who loves Akiho and Kaito. It's representing them united in their suffering (the artifact) but also in the hope for a better future (Akiho is smiling and the Card will be used to grant them safety, away from their abusers). I've always imagined that one of the last Cards Sakura might have produced would have Akiho and Kaito's elements, and here it is.

Also, how AWESOME is that Sakura managed to dispose of that damn artifact and succeeded to use it for Kaito and Akiho's sake, and turned it against the monsters who created it??? HOW. AWESOME. IS. THAT!!!!

Producing the very first consciously created transparent Card sucked almost all of Sakura's power and strength, and she's close to fainting, under the terrified eyes of Akiho, who lets go of Kaito for a moment in a gesture of going towards her "sister". But Sakura isn't done yet, no. She can't give up yet because her job isn't done.

And I Will Make Them Remember About You

Sakura wants for Akiho and the people who care about her (the ENG decided to translate this with "the people SHE holds dear") to remember who Akiho really is. She wants basically to "undo" what the rewriting of the world caused on the people who know Akiho, making them believe that she was born into the Kinomoto family and that she was Sakura and Touya's sister.

After pondering for a while and discussing with my friends over at my Discord server, I decided I'm not gonna go out on a limb and assume things from this decision, because I definitely NEED to read the next chapter to see how much Sakura intends people to remember, with this move. It's really not clear at all, as of now.

Anyway, other translation inaccuracy incoming!

Sakura, ENG: "I'm going to make another new card for that...and I might not have the power to do it alone" Sakura, JP: "It might probably be really difficult to create one more new card with my power, right now..."

As you can see, the nuance is different, because Sakura in the JP addresses how it's almost impossible for her to create another new card in the situation she is in right now, exhausted and all.

That's why, very cleverly, she's going to do something different. (My gosh how proud I am of this girl!!)

Saying "But these two Cards will surely help me", Sakura skillfully manages to merge Time and Rewind to create a new Card, not from scratch (which requires more power) but using what she's already got: and that's how the REMIND Card is born!!! The name of the Card originated by just replacing the "W" of Rewind with the "M" of Time. Ingenious, isn't it???

And as the two Cards merge, they give us lots of flashbacks, like the "effect" used here resembles a lot the one that used to happen when Sakura was changing the Clow Cards into the Sakura Cards back in the old arcs, or how the merging of two Cards seems to also be a callback to how the "card without name" and the "Nothing" merged to create HOPE in the very last minutes of Movie 2! What a nostalgic trip down the memories lane!

And the appearance of this Card is even more touching, because it features Syaoran (with his current age) holding Nadeshiko's pendant watch. I found that so sweet, especially coupled with Yelan's assistance to Sakura in this chapter. Yelan associated with Sakura, and Syaoran associated with Nadeshiko. How sweet. And when you think that even Lilie, Akiho's mother, was associated with Kaito, you really can realize that this is some kind of "theme" that CLAMP seemed to be wanting to portray in this story.

I Can't Be On Everyone's Side

And now, the scene that I think is worth the whole chapter, but probably the whole Clear Card Arc in its entirety. As usual, with important scenes, I'll use the literal translation from Japanese:

Sakura, JP: "It might not be right that there'll be people who will forget things (after this), but....I can't be everyone's friend/ally/can't be on everyone's side. So I won't go back...but actually, along with the people important to me... I WANT TO GO ON"

Wow. Let that sink in.

Sakura, of Cardcaptor Sakura, just came to the realization and spelled out clearly that she cannot be on everyone's side. That she cannot be "everyone's friend", like in a cheesy fairytale.

And I really, really, want to thank CLAMP-sensei for this scene and this line because for a period, long time ago, I was worried that this story would go down the "let's be friends" or "let's show sympathy to them" route. But as the chapters continued and the things CLAMP told us about the Association and the Squids were more and more cruel, and they made me more and more sick, I started to realize that there was simply no way CLAMP could've had Sakura try to justify or compromise with them. Because when cruelty is real, there's no compromise to be made.

This scene also shows how Sakura realizes for the first time ever that in her world, contrary to what we all believed previously, evil exists. It might not touch her or her "entourage" directly (and she's really blessed for that), but it exists out there and it's hurting people, people who can also become really important to her. And she decides to not stand idly by, blessed as she is with the luck of not experiencing that evilness, but actually using whatever it is in her power to bring those suffering people to safety.

Sakura cannot fight those people on equal terms. She's just 13, and although her power is very strong, she's still inexperienced. Moreover, she cannot really bring herself to deny her current nature and use violence on other human beings. That's not Sakura. I want you guys to reflect on this because I know that one of the favorite things expected for this finale was to have a direct magical confrontation with the true villains of this arc, defeating them and restablishing the peace. And I am sincere when I say that I would've wished for the same too, because you know how much I love Kaito and Akiho, and how much I was disgusted to read about what they did to them. I've spread my "burn the squids" gifs all over the fandom. I wanted someone to vindicate them. But not here. Not in this manga. I realized that after the initial satisfaction, I would've probably felt like the series would've been "defiled". And that's exactly what happens when you answer to violence with more violence.

Sakura just could not go hunting those bastards down and defeat them in a magical battle. Because, powerful and corrupted in their greed as they are, the only way to "fix" this situation would've been to exterminate them. I just could not picture this story to cross that boundary, no matter how much the bar had already been raised well over what we initially thought.

So, if someone out there is disappointed by this outcome, I'm sorry for you, but it was just not meant to be and I'm actually really glad that this series kept true to its fundamental values. Of course it would, CLAMP really do care about this series and they know very well how far to push the plot, and when to actually stop.

So what is the role of Akiho's clan and the Magic Association in this story, especially considering that we never saw their faces at all? Talking with lots of fans in these years, especially Japanese, I've come to the conclusion that they are not in this story to fill the "villain that needs to be deafeated" role, but actually they're a representation of abusive families that smother and suffocate their children with expectations, completely disregarding those children's natural inclinations, and abuse them when they do not meet such expectations, but also the society as a whole, that looks at you only basing on how it can take advantage of you. Which is exactly what happened to Akiho and Kaito, driving them to very dark places. The absence of faces for those characters makes it possible for the readers to see the Squids and the Association as the representation of whatever environment they relate the most to. It can be family, society, school, workplace etc... It also helps us focusing on their actions, rather than their faces, and not attribute any prejudice to them (because of religion, race, skin color, or whatever other attribute they could have).

Seeing as the story treats them more like a concept, than an actual entity, it's basically impossible for Sakura to defeat them (and their great power is an indication of that impossibility). Just like in real life, darkness will always exist, along with light. Good and evil will always be side by side. It's bigger than any of us. Then, what can we do, in a situation like this? What Sakura is choosing to do, here, is not to confront directly with violence these people who are way out of her league, and not even to sit back and look, but actually finding a way to make them forget about her friends and keeping her friends safe, granting them the possibility of living a happy life, finally away from the darkness of the past, healing the wounds on their souls together with the people they love and who love them back. Because even if you've been abused in the past, you can still hope for a happy life.

The focus here is all on helping the abused people. And Sakura, in order to do that, is okay with coming to terms with the fact that she can't be on everyone's side, and she needs to choose. In the end, the thing that really matters the most is to GO ON with your most important people. Not going back to what is lost, but going forward. And I know that this is such a CLAMP theme, and I'm glad that they reiterated it in this arc. When I say that Clear Card brought Sakura so much more closer to what's usual for CLAMP, I mean this.

The panel with Sakura raising her staff and shouting she wants to go on is absolutely beautiful, with those wings growing so big and unleashing Sakura's power in a storm of cherry blossom petals.

Sakura is exhausted, she finally reached her limit by using her ultimate magic. As she faints, her eyes just make it in time to catch a glimpse of her prince, the love of her life grabbing tightly his girlfriend's hand, to not let her fall, while the watch of Remind and the book of Blank do their job in the background. And I really loved this spread too, because even if it's not a conventional romantic scene made of physical display of love, this in my opinion is even more powerful. Many were reminded of Tsubasa, but I was also reminded of the long time those two spent unable to touch one another, and this scene here seems like a catharsis for that hardship they went through. Syaoran will always catch Sakura everytime she falls, he will always be there to grab her hand, no matter if he can really touch her or not. Cause his love is stronger than any kind of impediment. He will always be by her side, no matter what. When she's exhausted by her heroine's duties, she knows that she can always count on him to support her.

And speaking of "always be by her side", I just can't avoid mentioning how Akiho and Kaito stayed "glued" to eachother for the entire duration of this chapter, protecting and supporting one another. Kaito, in particular, kept holding Akiho even as Sakura's magic was hurting him like hell, because it was extracting the book from him. Even in excruciating pain, he did not let go of Akiho, intent in protecting her and keeping her safe in his hold. Akiho let go of him just for a moment when she was scared out of her mind for Sakura, but went back to him when she saw that her "sister" was hellbent in completing her task no matter what. Kaito, as the good "moon boy" he is, is someone who shows his feelings through his actions rather than words, just like Syaoran. And his constant grip on Akiho in this chapter, such an opposite act compared to how he used to stop his hand everytime it started reaching out to her, told me all that I needed to know about him: she's his most important person, and he will never let go of her, ever again.

Sakura wakes up in her bed. The scene is a direct parallel with an almost identical scene in chapter 3, as you can see here:

Kero is next to her and is relieved to see her awake, so he goes to shout in the hallway, directed to Touya, that Sakura is finally awake. Sakura seems a bit surprised to see Kero talking so nonchalantly with her brother, and he tells her that he chatted with him back at Yukito's house, together with Suppy, so I guess now he finds it "natural" to talk to her brother too! 😂 I'm kinda glad to know that, I like this "change of relationship", compared to the old series (and it was also kinda long overdue).

Sakura opens the palm of her hands and she finds the Dream Key, still intact and all. She also asks about Remind and Blank, and Kero confirms to her that she was able to use them successfully! Sakura is absolutely delighted to hear that, and says "We were able to go on!"

And thaaaaaaat's how the second-to-last chapter of Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card ends! Solving a lot of the pending situations, but still leaving some secondary questions that will surely find a (more or less) detailed explanation in the final, next chapter. And well, we also have to prepare to not have ALL the answers to ALL the questions we might have. This is usual for CLAMP, and especially in their Spaces they never made it a secret that they love for their fans to wreck their brains over theories and imagining the characters' future after a series is over. They love for the fans to give their interpretations to things, they encourage that a lot (also because it creates more long-lasting engagement with their series).

Alas, I expect they'll leave something in particular to everyone's interpretation, but we'll see. 😅

Overall, I really loved this chapter and it was really emotional for me. I think it's fitting for a "climax". Sakura was ABSOLUTELY running the show and after this I dare anyone to say that she isn't the main character of her story. She pushed her limits, and even questioned her own morality in doing so. What a wonderful thing. She reminded me so much of Sakura-hime when she shooted all those monsters in order to take the precious egg, back in the Acid Tokyo arc of Tsubasa. She knew she was doing something bad, but her wish to do everything needed in order to "have him back" was stronger than anything else. And she made her own choice. Here, Sakura, on a smaller scale, made her own choice too.

Now, I hope in the last chapter we'll be granted the possibility to delve a bit more into Kaito and his thoughts, I need to see his character development, I need to see that he learned something from this. That he -at least- started to interrogate himself over the nature of his feelings for Akiho. I know it's reasonable to think that with him, things will take looooong time, but as least show me the signs. Because I need to know that Akiho will be truly happy with him (I know she will!), and she can only be if he's learned to be honest with himself. And learned what Lilie meant with the last conversation we saw between them.

Also, WHERE'S MOMO, I NEED TO SEE MOMO BEFORE THIS ENDS!!

Okay, this is probably the longest post I ever did but I think as the second-to-last chapter it deserved to have some big thematics explored in depth, because they're very important. I'm still pondering if I should divide the post of the final chapter in two because, in addition to even more pages, I expect there'll be soooooooooo much to talk about (cross your fingers with me that there won't be any translation mistake).

I also hope there'll be room for an epilogue or a couple of extra chapters, to help us coping with the separation in a more gradual way, cause after 7 years it's quite hard. I was curious to see the end, of course, but also not entirely ready to let this wonderful story go. I really, really enjoyed it and I say this from the bottom of my heart. I don't care what everyone else thinks, I can only be grateful to CLAMP for Clear Card Arc. 🙏

Chapter 80, along with all the tears that will come with it, is expected to be uploaded on November 29th on CLAMP's Youtube channel. Yes, it's less than a month away! I also expect some news about the anime (BLESS THE ANIME!! Something to cling onto when the manga is over 😭).

Well, see you at the end of November (please come to hold my hand cause I cannot do this alone, lol) !!!

#cardcaptor sakura #card captor sakura #ccsakura #clear card arc #ccs spoilers #sakura card captor #chapter 79 #sakura kinomoto #akiho shinomoto #yuna d. kaito #syaoran li #translation differences

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thebestofoneshots · 6 months

Text

WOLFSTAR X READER SERIES

Gilded Constellations | THE INTERLUDE

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Summary: You meet Sirius and Regulus at a family vacation in the Caribbean, but things don't go as planned and you end up losing contact once the trip is over. Years later your family moves to England and you get accepted at Hogwarts where you finally meet Sirius once again, along with all of his friends. One of them with a mysterious secret, that you'll uncover as you embark on your own Hogwarts adventure. This IS a wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it.

Hey Lovelies, welcome to “The Interlude” of Gilded Constellations. We’ve basically already gotten to 100 k words in this story and that’s absolutely insane!!! Which is why I thought of doing a little thing where I could interact with my readers. As a thank you for being there and supporting me so much through this journey.

And so… this little Q&A was born. Those who didn't get to ask their questions, don’t worry my darlings, my ask will be open all week for you to ask whatever you want. It’s a mini event that will last from today ‘till next wednesday.

But yes, it does mean this week we won’t get a new chapter D:

Don’t worry, it will definitely be worth it since the next couple of episodes are two that I’ve put absolute extra care on crafting, and I will put just as much care on revising. I’ve been quite literally posting non stop for 15 weeks consecutively. That’s almost 4 months, what?!?!

I needed my tiny lil break, besides I wanted to dedicate this bit of time to work on my Maraudween Special smutty series that will include some interesting mini AUs, so those that read my other stuff and not just Gilded Constellations will be quite literally treated this Halloween. There will be a lot of posts these next few weeks. Although, I might be releasing some of the Maraudween stories at the beginning of November. Unfortunately, I’m not a machine and I can’t write in seconds like Chat GPT.

Without further ado, let’s get on with those questions!

Where did you get the inspo for the fic?

Oh my god if I tell you guys about this… It all started when I was in class, sometimes when I’m bored, my little mind starts to wander. I’m a total daydreamer, I can’t deny that, but at that moment in particular I was quite literally thinking of nothing and everything at the same time. And then, out of nowhere, this phrase came to me:

“You look at them the same way you looked at me when we met…”

And I was like, “omg that’s so freaking angsty” and “That’s a great freaking line for a poly story” And I quite literally wrote it down with a little tag that said, “-the start of a poly relationship story because I’ve never read enough of those.”

And then I closed the notebook and went back to class. But I guess the idea had already set in my brain because next thing I know, I’m writing down more things down. And let me tell you, before Gilded Constellations I only wrote Oneshots because a story seemed like too much commitment. So I kid you not, I wrote down:

“Not a short story, but maybe a 3-5 chapter long fic”.

Jokes on me though, we’re 15 chapters in, like 20-something written and we’re probably going to end up with longer than 200k words and I’m not even sorry about it. Besides, I'm really pumped to finish it because I want to get it printed in Lulu and have my own little copy as a “Damn you wrote that.” kind of evidence thing. So worry not about being left with an unfinished fic, I’m going to complete this story even if it’s the last thing I do.

Besides, if I’m being honest, when I’m not writing, I miss my boys, so I’ll definitely miss passing the time with them when I’m done with GC. (Luckily I’ve already got another series planned and spoiler alert: This one will be Poly!Marauders x reader, a lot spicier aaaand, PIRATES.)

That’s how the fic started, well that and a dream that was basically most of Chapter 3 and I thought it was so cute that I wrote it down and then I was like, “hold up, this could be the start of the Poly story I was talking about…”

Are there any real-life experiences that influenced your writing?

Well I mean, I’d say that art imitates life and life imitates art, but in regards to real-life romance I don’t really know that much. But there are definitely some things here and there that have been sprinkled from my real life into the fic. Not sure if I could think of a particular one but I can say sometimes Remus gives me the same vibe that a boy I “used to” have a crush on. “Used to” in quotation marks because I kinda still do even if we haven’t seen each other in years.

So I guess a lot of Remus comes from my crush, but also Remus is his own little boy as well and I love him more for it. Even If I’m torturing him so much with his heartache, I promise it will be worth it Remus, reader and Sirius will take care of you, eventually.

Other than that, I guess I like to pay attention to things around me, you’ll see me looking at nature, the sky, the way leaves move, the way people interact with each other. Especially at that actually, I like to pay attention to people, how they move, how they interact, and their reactions. Sometimes I do it irl, and sometimes I just watch movies or series, and since my writing process is like seeing a movie in my head and then putting it into words, it’s always useful to pay attention to the world around me. Even if I sometimes struggle to put into words exactly what I’m seeing in my head.

Did you already have everything planned, or did you just go with the flow? If you have already, how far? all of it? Or just some chapters ahead?

Well, yes and no. I do have various key points of the story planned, a lot of plot points that are going to happen and that’s kinda what I’m sustaining myself on. I know the big points and then I just have to write what happens in between them. And I’ve got it planned all the way ‘till my babes all start dating. After that, if I’m honest I’m not sure how I’m going to end it. Some parts of me want to go for the saddest ending possible because it would go along with cannon and the other side of me, the one that can’t bear to see my boys being sad, wants to just deviate completely and/or leave an open ending.

But so far, I really cannot tell what exactly I’m going to do, I just know that time will tell. Because sometimes the characters just do what they want and I love to see where they take me. Which is why the ending is not set in stone just yet.

Without giving too many spoilers, can you tease upcoming plot twists or surprises we can expect in future chapters?

My sly little foxes have already guessed some of the major plot twists that are upcoming in the story. And there definitely will come some surprises along the way, some you will love, some you won’t so much. But I promise you it will all be worth it!

Remember in Gilded Constellations, everything happens for a reason.

THE FANCAST

What's your fancast for the fic? Did you pick the reader too or just leave it be? // I wanted to know if you have a fancast for everyone…

I did mention that I basically see stuff as a movie in my head right? So yes, I do have a fancast! Although I most definitely see James as Aaron, Sirius as Ben, Remus as Andrew and Peter as Dane, I have also twisted them in my brain. Like it’s them, right? But my version of them. Like my Sirius is so fucking ethereal in my head that sometimes I myself blush with his beauty. And Remus, well, he is probably most similar to Talita Asami’s from instagram. Especially this one.

There’s something about the way she contrasts his soft features with the scars that’s just perfect. It’s that sexy pirate vibe I cannot get out of my head, if that makes sense. But also I’ve been toying with AI lately (Talkie) and ended up with these two versions of Remus and Sirius and they have absolutely taken over.

Sidenote: I made way to many of these, so do tell me if you wanna see them.

The reader: Uhm… well, I kind of just see her as me, hehe. Which is kind of the point, you should all just see the reader as yourselves, if you’re comfortable with that of course.

The rest of our babies though? Lily Evans, Marlene and Mary, are kind of like the boys as in I see them as their fancast but also not entirely. And Lily especially, she’s just so freaking pretty in my head, there’s no one I know to match her, all thought Sophie Skelton and Kennedy Walsh (@/c4tluvr666 on Tiktok) are super close.

Now, outside of canon characters, aka all of these OC’s I’ve been creating with time, some of them do have a fancast and some of them don’t. Let’s focus on the ones that do, because some of them I literally had in my head since the very, very beginning of the fic.

Tom Harrow- This boy actually started as a younger version of Tom Hiddleston in my head, but the more I wrote him, the more he said, “Luv, that’s not what I look like!” And, almost out of nowhere, baby Tom Hiddleston became Rober Sheehan, and let me tell you, it stuck. And it stuck so bad there is no way I could see Tom as anything other than Rob. Especially with his role as Klaus in Umbrella Academy having a rather similar personality in the entire open-minded spectrum that he’s got going on. And, talking about teasers, this boy is actually going to be a key point on the romance between our golden throuple to develop, so keep an eye out for him. I love him so much tbh.

Then we’ve got Beth Doxon, this girl is my wifey, I freaking love Beth so much and if you’ve been paying attention you may already know who I based her off, at least in looks. It’s Anya Taylor Joy as Beth Harmon in Queen’s Gambit, redhead queen (can you tell I really, really like redheads?) . Also that’s why she has such a strong character, even if my Beth is a lot more of a Party Animal than the original character.

Alexander Wood in my head is just a carbon copy of his son Oliver, but in Hufflepuff, and the rest of the Quidditch teams, I’ve got a good idea of what they look like in my head, but not really a fan cast for them. Suggestions accepted.

Well, except for Minho Yun, since his role in the story is going to be as a pretty strong supporting character, in fact, he was meant to be somewhat of an alt love interest that was going to help build Sirius’ jealousy, but in the end, I decided to completely scrap that to further develop him as a character. Some interesting things that you’ll actually learn on the GC Halloween special. Oh, and Minho is actually based on Sang Heon Lee (on looks) and Ki Hong Lee (on character, specifically on his role in Maze Runner). Had I based Minho on the character of Sang Heon Lee who inspired him, we would have way too many slutty boys in the same room, with Tom and Sirius and him, It’d be chaos, which is why he ended up being a little shier.

Nox, Neil and Todd, literally are just Nox, Neil and Tod from De*d Poets Society. I was rewatching the movie to nail that boy friend group interactions and to get in the Dark Academia Vibes and I wanted to give my boys a happy ending.

Also Neil just gives me the most massive Prongs vibe I cannot.

And lastly, there’s Nina Blythe. Nina to me is a totally angelic girl, I’ve got a very vivid picture of what she looks like in my head but I don’t really have a fancast for her. Maybe a little bit like Aurora (the singer), in regards to her soft features, but Nina has longer hair and it’s a little wavy. I kind of think of her as a girl from a Renaissance painting, emphasis on girl, since she is supposed to look younger than she is. Any ideas for a fancast? For her and for anyone I missed, I’m completely open to your suggestions.

THE TEACHERS

Professor Nightshade is definitely Eva Green from Miss Peregrine or Jessica Chastain from Crimson Peak. She’s got that tall, regal and dark but elegant vibe to her that is just so freaking gorgeous and awe-inspiring. I totally have a crush on Seraphina, can you tell?

Professor Aurelius Spellman is kind of inspired by Kingsley Shackelbolt. However, if I had to cast someone for the role it would be Djimon Hounsou, he has that attractive and rough vibe to him. Like scary, demanding but also alluring things going on, he’s just got the magician type I suppose.

This one’s going to be silly, but I can’t imagine Kettleburn as anyone other than Gobber the Belch from HTTYD, like, take away the horned helmet and give him a pointy hat, and boom, Kettleburn ladies and gentlemen. Down to the messy personality, honestly.

And Donovan Pendragon (the teacher for Magical Theory) I feel like he isn’t mentioned enough, because I literally had no idea what his name was even going to be and I just left a line for it until I was editing the chapter before posting. So he doesn’t really have a cast. He’s caucasian in my head, but that’s about all I’ve got from him. Any ideas?

Do you have any headcanons for any of the characters and their relationship that you haven’t talked about in the story?

REMUS: Well I feel like this one has been talked about several times in the story but Remus being a beast in bed? I feel like everyone loves to tease him about it in the castle but to me, he’s also a total soft boy? Like especially the first time, I feel like he’s going to be so overwhelmed by both Sirius and Reader that he will basically just melt in the hands of his lovers.

SIRIUS: Smitten little puppy of my life.

SIRIUS AND REMUS: They’ve totally kissed in the past. At least once, and Remus still dreams about it. Sirius, well… maybe he’ll get some memories of it every now and then.

READER: My girl thinks she’s so freaking smart and yet is the most oblivious to her own feelings; she could be considered an idiot. She’s also so selfless it hurts, but like literally. Also, she loves flirting with Sirius way too much. Still, they definitely will need Rem in their relationship because there is no self-preservation sense when her personality is just as chaotic as our Puppy. Side note: Remus will 100% blush when she starts flirting with him in the same way he does with Sirius. And let’s not talk about what a tomato he will be when Sirius does it as well.

PETER: He kinda disliked the reader at first, especially since he felt like she was taking away his friends, but eventually he warmed up to her, and loves their friendship.

LILY: She enjoyed the kiss with Reader, and it made her realize she’s totally bi, because she also enjoyed the kiss with James.

TOM: My boy is clever as hell and he knows a lot more than he lets on. Also, he secretly ships the golden throuple.

BETH: She’s Tom’s bestie and she knows a lot of things too. She will also ignite chaos with the ultimate goal of being Gryffindor Tower’s own cupid. Do you think what happened at Marlene’s Party was a coincidence?

REGG: My beautiful Reggie is still sad about the incident. He’s still trying to find a way to reconnect with you and it pains him that you think he’d rat you out. Even then, he values the fact that you are with Sirius and that you’re helping him through everything that’s been going on, especially since he saw how red Sirius’s eyes were when he left the Black’s house with a trunk in hand sobs stuck in his throat. Reg cried like a baby that night, just wishing for time to go by as fast as possible so he could go back to school and see his big brother again. (I’m so sorry for that guys).

MINHO: Has a secret crush and you would not believe me if I told you who it was.

NINA: Has a secret crush and some of you have probably already guessed who it is.

DAMOCLES: You don’t know him yet but omg he’s just so clever, thank you Kles for existing.

And let's be honest, I totally have a bunch more of this but I think this is way more than enough, for now…

Out of all the chapters so far, what’s been your favorite?

This is too fucking hard to decide. But If I had to choose my top three, and in no order in particular, I’d say, for the released ones:

Fooled around and Fell in Love

Because, can we talk about the kiss scene? I feel like this one will come back bite my kiddos in the back so they finally realize what they actually fucking need.

Do Ya

I’m a total sucker for Sirius, what can I tell ya? But also the flying scenes were so much fun to write, totally an adventure to go through, still among my favs.

Maybe I’m amazed

“Do you like Golf?”

From the unreleased episodes:

Tonight’s What It Means To Be Young

The calm before the storm. Or is it the storm before the storm?

Bad Moon Rising

The FUCKING storm. But also one of my favorite things I’ve ever written. I think I like action scenes a little too much.

*** On The Run

The storm continues. But also, the calm after the storm.

Do you have a playlist that you always listen to when you're writing?

Not a specific playlist, but I have been listening to a lot of ‘70s rock. Things like Queen, Bowie, Boston, Foreigner, Kansas, Fleetwood Mac, Nazareth, The Police and some others. All of them help me get in the mood for writing. At least in the mood of the era, if that makes sense.

Aside from the ’70s classics, I’ve also been listening to a lot of Lord Huron, Hozier, and Aurora (I sort of discovered her recently and I’m obsessed with some of her songs). Also some of The Killers, Dotan and Vian Izak sprinkled here and there. Bastille and Imagine Dragons are always and forever so of course they wouldn’t be missing from my list.

But when I’m struggling, like really struggling with writing, then I go to this Best Instrumental playlist, where they have everything from the Narnia and Peter Pan 2003 soundtracks to Vivaldi and Ghibli. It really does help with the concentration.

How long for the guys to understand that they fancy each other?

Well, when you say the guys do you mean Sirius and Remus? ‘Cause then it’s not thaaaaaat far away from now. Now from then to them all dating, well…

I know Remus kind of struggles with feelings, and probably even more now that Sirius and the reader are together. But when he's gonna say "hey, can I come in?" 😏 lol I just want them together so baaaad!

Ahahahahahaha, Well that’s not exactly how it’s gonna go, but it’ll happen sometime after Christmas.

After wolfstar and the reader get together, the fic will end? or we're gonna have a lot of them together to compensate for the agony? 🥺

I’m not sure about the ending yet, but I’m definitely going to add so much fluff of the three of them together that you’re all gonna get cavities. Also, I’ve been writing The 5 Senses and the Halloween special (that might be finished until after Halloween) to practice for the spice, so I’m def compensating for the agony.

Also, I kind of want to explore the social implications of being in a throuple, of making that public in the `70s. Seems like a whole lotta issue bringer that kinda interests me… Sorry, you’re not completely getting rid of the angst even when they’re all together.

I don’t remember if I already asked you about this, but as a Regulus’ wife, I need to know. He'll come back, right? She will talk with him and he will be able to explain everything to her? I need this, I really need this! I can leave without this closing. THEY NEED TO BE FRIENDS AGAIN!

Your husband is safe with me. I promise. I’m not gonna say it’s gonna be very soon, but he will be safe because I love baby Reggie and I too can’t stand him being mistreated either.

Not a question. I just want to say that I really love this story. It's one of my favorites, and I just put it on my masterlist for how much I love it.

Aww shut up, I love you so much <3

Will we have some Sirius jealousy? ‘Cause I'm really interested in that. Oooh... will he notice that Reader and Remus are... more than friends before they even know it? I dunno, he's just oblivious about everything around him.

Funny that you ask, yes we will have a lot of Jealous!Sirius, in fact, it’s a huge part of how the throuple will develop. And you will have it so soon, even if it’s not exactly what you expect it to be. I can’t wait for next week!

And in regards to noticing, well… Sirius is not going to be the most oblivious about his own feelings in this story. I mean… not always.

Are there any particular scenes or moments in your story that were especially fun or challenging to write?

Well, I’m actually finding it a lot harder to write stuff atm, so I’d say the limbo between the Bad Moon Rising Arch and the next big thing that’s going to happen has been the hardest. Especially since I’m already going to get to a key point in which some shit is going to go down and I’m still not sure how bad and angsty I want to make it. Don’t worry, our golden throuple will be alright but…

In regards to fun, I must say the parties are some of my favorites, Potion Pong was incredibly fun to write ‘cause I literally transported myself to it and it was like actually living it, even if it was in my head. Also the flying scenes, they’re always fun to write, the race was incredible tbh.

I love to write the fun banter and the teasing too, it brings me joy. But I bet you could tell I’m one for the teasing from the very first chapters of Gilded Constellations.

Nina fancies Reader, right? She does. I just need a yes. I already know that 😌

( ≖‿ ≖ )

Can you share any behind-the-scenes trivia or Easter eggs that readers might not have noticed in your story?

I feel like there’s a lot of behind-scenes I shared so far but I guess I could share a few pics of my organization systems. Things like…

Your schedule:

The cover:

Some of you have already been theorizing about it too, you can look at some of those theories over here, and here, and also here.

Alt Covers I designed but weren't chosen:

Something you might not know:

GC is also available on Wattpad and AO3. The AO3 chapters usually drop like 30 minutes or an hour before Tumblr because it's easier to post there. And the Wattpad releases are actually way behind in comparison (there isn't much engagement over there).

Some Shots of my Plot notebook (0 spoilers):

And also, have you noticed the special little thing in the names of the chapters? 10 housepoints to whoever notices

I just thought of this, but what if we make a little housepont system and from things that you guys guess of the story you get housepoints and then we have a houseprice in the end? OMG I'd love to do this, if you're on tell me your house in the comments. So far Sytherin would have like 40 points just beacuse of dear @cometsghost and I'm not sure what is @blacksgarden house but they would also have like 40 pts.

How do you stay motivated and inspired to keep writing, especially in moments when you might experience writer's block?

It may or may not be healthy, but I just force myself to type? I never really have writer’s block, rather I’d call it writer’s overload. It’s when I’m running through so many possibilities in my head and I can’t pick which is the one I want to go through with. So I keep thinking about it and I don’t type. Which is why I just force myself to type, more often than not I’ll end up writing something I really like.

And as for the motivation, honestly just getting to see my boys again. To be able to submerge back into Hogwarts, that’s enough motivation. I seriously get an urge to go back because I miss them. It's kinda crazy. Like I might be chilling at home and suddenly the thought “I wish I was at Hogwarts” crosses my mind, not even joking.

The other motivation is finishing my book so I can get a printed version to place in my bookshelf and show it off. Not that anyone would know what it is, but I’d know, which is enough, hehe. And also to be a better writer, they say you should write every single day, which is kind of what I’m attempting to do with GC. By writing a chapter every week, I literally force myself to write every single day, even if just a couple of words.

Can we have cute moments with Remus? uuuh, Will he be cute when she notices that she really likes him?

Yes! We can have all the cute moments with Remus. Even before they all notice they’re into each other, we’re gonna have so many cute moments because even if Reader is dating Sirius I can’t leave my beautiful boy on the sidelines. Besides, how can I torture him if he doesn’t get a taste of how good it would be to be with them?

What can readers look forward to in the next chapters, and do you have any long-term plans or goals for GCs development?

Angst. Don’t hate me for this. But also comfort, and some fun little adventures and then a bit more angst, hehe…

Well, that’s the end of the questions I got sent ahead. Hope you enjoyed this rollercoaster of a Q&A. If you have any more, or if my answers have provoked further questions, then by all means, share them with me, I’d love to be able to interact with you a bit more.

Love ya, Lily xx

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skunaskitten · 8 months

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The Affair ch 9 End

AU: human ceo sukuna x female reader

Contains: fluff, smut, family talk, dont want to spoil the happy ending.

Summary: Things take a new turn in sukuna's life with you in it. Everything he had dreamed is finally in his arms and he is not letting you go ever.

Master list to other stories

chapter 8 ch9

When you started to work alongside sukuna in his office you had only been there for a week and you started to notice the stares from other workers, mainly the females.

It made you worry that sukuna liked the attention from them or possibly flirted with the girls here because he was interested. Since they found out he is not married they took it apon themselves to force their way to get all his attention.

You sat at your desk in his office checking his emails and writing stuff down to post up for his meetings. Sukuna walked over to you to see if you needed help and always placed a kiss to your cheek saying I love you.

Sukuna did not keep it under a low eye when you walked by him down one of the computer rooms carrying his files. He grabbed your arm to stop you then pressed his lips against yours. It made you blush as he walked away and you saw the stares from others in the room looking shocked. But some looked upset because you were in their way of taking sukuna.

A rumor started to go around that you were the one that forced sukuna to ditch his ex and be with you. Or that you were just the homewrecker. Others say you are just a quick fuck and nothing more and just gold digger who is taking advantage of his broken heart.

Sukuna noticed on a day how quiet you were. You didn't get up to join him for coffee, telling him that you didn't feel like walking and not in the mood to drink coffee.

When he came back he walked over to you seeing you with your head down against the table covered by your arms as he placed a cup of coffee on your desk.

"Hey sweetheart you alright? You want to go home."

He watched you shake your head then heard a sniffle sound coming from you.

Sukuna carefully took your arm and pulled you to look at him seeing your eyes puffy with tears.

"What happened?"

He sounded upset and worried as you shook your head. His face showed that he was about to kill whoever did this to you.

"My love do not lie to me or tell me its nothing. Tell me now."

You let out a sigh and looked at him while holding his hands for comfort.

"When I was in the bathroom I heard some girls in the bathroom talking about me. Calling me a whore and a bitch for taking you away from your ex. Then saying all I look good for is a quick fuck nothing more. Saying that it won't take long till you cheat on me with one of them since they said you flirt with a lot of the women here. I started to worry and-"

Sukuna quickly shut you by running a hand across your cheek and pressed the pad of his thumb across your lips then he leaned in giving you a slow passionate kiss.

You couldn't help but to kiss back and pull him closer to you as you hummed against his lips.

He pulled away to say. "Beautiful, do not listen to anyone. You are the only one for me. I love you. We have been through so much and I am never letting you go never. Not even death can take you from me."

You smiled feeling him rub his thumbs across your cheeks. He then pulled you up to your feet pulling your body against his. A hand went up into your hair and slightly pulled your head back to press his lips to your neck making you moan. "Sukuna. We can't do this here."

He let out a growl and said "my office my rules. I can do what I want and right now I want you."

Sukuna had lifted you into his arms as you wrapped your legs around his waist and he took you over to his desk sitting you down on it. You watched him walk away to lock his office door then quickly strode over to you grabbing your face between his palms and kissed you hard.

You moaned against his lips and started to reach for his suit to unbutton the front of it, helping you slip it off, tossing it onto his chair and starting to open his undershirt.

Your hands slid inside his shirt and grabbed his chest giving his pecs a squeeze as he chuckled against your lips. He started to do the same with you running his hands under your skirt and gripping your thighs pulling them apart for his hips to slip between them.

"How wet are you my dear?"

Pressing your lips to his neck and trailed them up his jaw to nip at his ear saying "I am soaked for you sukuna."

You lifted yourself off the desk to let him pull off your laced panties and spread your legs for him while you unbutton the front of your shirt. He saw the bra you were wearing and unclipped the front of it, setting your breast free.

A seductive smirk formed on his face as he leaned over your body taking one of your breasts into his mouth and the other his hand giving it a squeeze.

"Sukuna…" all you could do was moan his name and buck your hips just wanting him inside you already.

He leaned back up and unbuckled his belt, opening his pants to slide them down and let hard shaft free. You blushed looking at the sight of him.

"Just know sweetheart this is all for you."

You let out a giggle then moaned, feeling his tip slide across your folds and into your entrance, slowly filling you up to the base of him. He watched you squirm in pleasure as you tried to buck your hips to feel him move.

"Such an inpatient little thing."

Sukuna grabbed your wrist and placed them over your head holding them down on his desk as he slowly started to move his hips.

Every inch of him can be felt slowly dragging across your walls making you whimper for more. "Kuna…I want you to go harder and faster please."

He chuckled saying "as you wish my love."

His thrust soon became hard and fast. He had to let go of your wrist to hold your hips down to keep you from sliding across his desk. His grunts and moans were loud enough to fill the room along with your chants of his name. If anyone came up to his door they would hear everything.

"Who do you belong to?!"

"You sukuna!"

"Who is fucking you on this desk?!"

"Sukuna!"

With each snap of his hips you were closer to your climax, he could feel the way you squeezed around him. He leaned over you more and rested his hands onto his desk as you wrapped your arms around him. Sukuna let out a growl then pushed some of his papers off his desk to get them out of the way of his love making.

Your legs and velvet walls squeezed him as you laid your head back creaming around his cock and yelled his name for everyone to hear. Sukuna let out a loud heavy moan giving a last pound into you painting your insides with his warm cum.

He breathed heavily then looked at you with a smile filling his face as you smiled back pulling his face down to press your lips to his. As he kissed you he slowly pulled out from you then lifted you to sit up on his desk. Doing so you felt some of the cream inside you leak down your folds onto the wood desk beneath you. Sukuna smirked and reached over to pull out some tissues and cleaned you up good enough to be comfortable.

Both of you got dressed but then you watched him stick your panties into his pants pocket. A blush filled your face seeing him smirk wide.

"Now sweetheart I want you to remember that I love you. Do not worry about what others think or say."

He talked as he leaned his hands onto the desk, his face close to yours and stared at you.

"Because you are mine and I am yours."

Two weeks passed and you were the most happy you could be with sukuna. But you noticed your hormones have been acting up. You didn't want to leave his side even on your days off when sukuna had to go in, you felt sad when he left.

It should have been your time of the month but that is a week passed due. The two of you have been in really active sex since you got back together. Though you brushed it off thinking it was just your irregular time again.

When going back to work sitting at your desk, sukuna was silently tapping away at his laptop but you just sat there not feeling the best. You heard the door to his office open and a female voice called out to sukuna in a flirtatious way knowing full well that you were there. They just liked to piss you off.

Hearing him greet her and talk about her next task you could hear the flirty giggles coming from her.

You started to feel sick to the stomach and body getting chills. You couldn't hold it any longer.

You quickly got up and went to sit on the floor by the side of your desk, grabbed the small trash can and threw up the lunch you had with sukuna.

The woman scoffed and gave a disgusted look but sukuna quickly pushed himself away from his desk and ran over to you.

"Beautiful, what’s wrong?"

He went onto his knees and rubbed your back then placed his hands into your hair to keep it away from your face.

"You are dismissed and send satoru in here!"

You spit into the trash can breathing hard and held it against you while sukuna stayed on the floor next to you. The woman had left and soon after satoru had come in seeing the two of you.

"Satoru I am going to go home early and stay with y/n she is not feeling well."

Gojo hands you water letting you rinse out your mouth. Sukuna grabbed your small purse he bought you nothing fancy but something black and durable. He placed it on himself then went over to hold you close to him not caring of the eyes that gaze to you two.

The whole night sukuna stayed by your side and took care of you bringing you some tea and laying next to you in bed while you watched your favorite show then he brought your ice cream.

You still felt a little sick in the morning but throughout the day you felt a lot better to go hang out with your friends for a while. Sukuna dropped you off at the mall then went to stop by at work. You told your friends what happened and what has been going on with you as they smiled at you and giggled.

"You're pregnant!"

Liz shouted out and you looked at her in shock then put the pieces together. Usually you take the after sex pill, but after doing it on his desk and when you got home that day. You forgot to even take it.

You felt your heart race and looked down at your hands as the girls looked at you concerned.

Cerin smiled and asked "does he want kids?"

You shrugged and said "we didn't talk about it. He mentioned he wants kids but this was before we broke up. We haven't spoken about it since then. What if he changed his mind?"

Jasmine giggled and said "we should get a test before we confirm anything. If it is negative then you will just have to be careful. If it's positive you need to talk to him."

Your friends walked with you to the pharmacy and helped you pick out the best one. When sukuna picked you up you hid it inside your bag at the very bottom. That night you had such bad sleep you kept waking up but sukuna stayed asleep holding you close. You did bring up the talk about kids when you got home how he felt about it.

He never had the thought of it until he got older. Explaining his ex never wanted any kids. But he is not pushing for it.

Which made you toss and turn all night because he didn't want any right now. You woke up for the last time seeing it was morning. You looked over to see sukuna still asleep. Taking the chance you grabbed your bag and went into the bathroom to take the test.

It felt like a long battle of nerves waiting for the test when your timer went off and you got up from the bathroom floor and took a look. Your heart dropped but it also started to beat fast.

It's positive.

You wanted to be outside in the garden to tell sukuna a special spot in his home. He already had some people start building a pond just for you like you always wanted and a spot to read your books. You went back to the room and grabbed the test hiding it in your pocket.

Sukuna sat at his desk in his office room hearing a knock at the door and smirked as he gazed at you standing in the doorway.

"Hello my love. You alright?"

"Sukuna, I want to have a little lunch together in the garden. I need to talk to you."

He can tell by how you are acting. It's a serious thing. He closed his computer and got up walking to you. You saw him dressed in a button shirt and jeans telling him to leave this on.

You took his hand and walked him out to the garden. He noticed the blanket under the cherry blossom tree with some strawberries and a small bottle of sake. A big smile filled his face then pressed a kiss to your cheek.

"A perfect date with my beautiful woman."

You giggled with a smile but then the butterflies in your stomach returned as it neared the conversation you needed to have. You both sat down, enjoying the view and nuzzling against each other eating strawberries.

He took the bottle wanting a little toast pouring you and him a little shot of sake. "To the love you brought me."

You smiled holding the cup saying "to the moment you came into my life."

He smiled softly at you and said "to our spirit that will find each other in the next life."

Sukuna bowed his head to you as you did the same to him and he took the drink but then saw you didn't. He tilted his head as you gave him a weak smile and set the cup down.

"Ryomen I can't drink this for a while."

"Why not?"

You gulped and reached into your pocket while you took his free hand to flip it palm up and place the test in his hand.

"I am pregnant."

Sukuna froze starting at the test dropping the cup onto the blanket. He looked at you seeing your eyes fill with tears.

He quickly pushed everything to the side, spilling the sake and pulled you into his lap and hugged you tight.

"You're pregnant! With my child. I am going to be a father!"

You smiled hugging him then looked to see the tears that filled his eyes. He pressed his forehead to yours, smiling wide.

He didn't know what to do. His hands roamed everywhere on your body then held your face in his hands.

"I love you y/n. We have been through so much and I do not deserve anything. But I am a selfish man and I wanted you. I couldn't let you go because you were all I wanted. The woman who brought me my heart. All started with an affair and now I am here to finally have love and a family. All thanks to you, beautiful. Please make me feel loved forever."

You felt him hold your hands in his tears glossing your eyes at his words.

"Y/n marry me."

You felt your heart swell and combust hearing those words.

"Ryomen I want you to be mine forever. Yes."

Sukuna couldn't keep his emotions down as he closed his eyes letting tears fall and pulled you against his body. You held onto him crying with him. As the sun fell with all the passion it led to you laying naked on your back against the blanket with him making love to you under the cherry blossom tree with the colors in the sky of the setting sun. This was all you could ask for. You didn't want anything else but sukuna.

A month later you and sukuna had been planning what to have at the wedding. It was just going to be a small one with the people you both knew.

The talk of you two getting married had spread through the building and even the news showed up in the magazines and online. Sukuna marrying you has been a big talk in the business life. Everyone was curious about where you came from and how you ended in the path of sukuna. Some of the fan girls both loved and hated you. They were happy for sukuna but others said you are just a gold digger.

The day of the wedding your friends helped you get dressed since you placed them as the bridesmaids. They fixed your hair by placing cherry blossom flowers in it. As you look down at your traditional white kimono that is fitted to you perfectly, you begin to feel your butterflies.

"What if something happens?"

Liz scoffed and said "woman you are fine and everything will be perfect."

You stood in front of the walk way that led to the ceremony. You took a deep breath and began to walk. The few people that were there turned and saw you with gasps. Sukuna stood at the altar and felt the world around him disappear. All his focus was just on you.

His heart swelled and ached as he tried to hold back the tears and biggest smile but couldn't as he watched you walk to him.

You smiled seeing him in a white kimono as well as a blush filled your cheeks. He is more handsome and beautiful than you thought he ever could. As you got to him he held out his hands and you placed yours into his.

The priest walked over with a ceremonial cup of tea and placed it into yours and sukunas hands. Sukuna looked at you ready to speak his vows.

"Y/n my sweetheart my beautiful. I know I was not the best man that came into your life. I was a liar. I broke your heart. But all the moments I spent with you my heart was at its happiest when you were by my side. I couldn't think of life without you. I always wanted to have someone who really loved me for who I am. We ran into eachother as if life put you in my path."

You saw his eyes begin to gloss over with tears.

"I could not let you go. I don't want to lose my heart. Now you have given me a family that I always wanted. I love you. I am sorry that I can not find the words to tell you how much I love you. But marrying me I will show you all the love I have for you."

You helped but to try to hold back your crying but you let the tears show. Hearing the slight crying of your friends behind you. The cup of tea warms your hands along with sukuna.

"Ryomen sukuna. I never thought I would see myself here. The moment I ran into you, I didn't think I would be here marrying the love of my life. So much has happened but I guess our hearts could not stay apart. Sukuna I will always be by your side. I will never leave. I love you so much kuna."

Sukuna smiled and sucked in his silent crying as you smiled back at him the priest walked over speaking the binding words of you and sukuna.

He lifted the tea putting it to your lips as you took the sip and you did the same for him. The priest spoke for you and sukuna to finally seal fate.

A big smile formed on your face as he walked closer to you placing his hands on your hips and pressed his lips to yours. He gave you a soft but passionate kiss as tears fell from your eyes. Sukuna pulled away and hugged you quickly and you hugged him back hearing him say "you're so beautiful."

Hearing the small family cheer and your friends squealing as they cheered. After the party you and sukuna took leave for a honeymoon sukuna had planned for the two of you.

He rented a shrine home in the forest for the week away from the city life and stress. It was just the two of you alone. Even though you carried his child, sukuna still made passionate love with you.

This was the life you were going to have for the rest of your life. Laying in the arms of the man you love, your husband, with your growing belly of his child. Seeing sukuna at home laying beside you and rubbing your stomach, placing kisses to it. You could not wait to see your baby grow in the proud arms of sukuna.

You are the love of sukuna's life just as he is the love of your life.

ahh i can not believe its over. I could have put more things but i didnt want it to cross over into other stories.

I am glad that so many of you enjoyed it!

#ryomen sukuna #sukuna #sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna x reader #jjk x reader #ceo!sukuna x reader #ceo!sukuna #ceo!au #ryomen sukuna smut #the affair

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the-bureaucracts-are-everything · 9 months

Text

welcome to the Ineffable bureaucracy ship week! Starting from the 21st till the 27th of August. Hope your looking forward to joining in and having fun!

Let's go over some things frist:

If you're participating please tag anything created with the prompts as IBweek2023 this will make it easier for everyone to keep track of stuff made by you lovely people

Please let me know if you don't want your stuff reblogged to here in the taggs of your stuff and I will respect your wishes, if nothing is said I will be rebloging everything with the tagg

While I know this is more geered towards art and writing (which I apologise for) You can create anything and long as it somehow fits in with the prompt (crafts, animatics playlists, videos, gifs, cosplay stuff..so go wild)

No pressure to complete all of the prompts, just do what is comfortable and fun for you! I know sometimes work or mental health can get in the way.

No pressure to fully stick with canon either, if you prefer their fanon dynamic made in season 1 more then you can make them like that for your version. I will say though if you are going to do their season 2 dynamic try to avoid whitewashing and also misgendering in genral, thanks. (Beez canonly uses they/them and gabe is genderless with he/him pronouns)

Please keep it genuinely sfw, as I want this to be as inclusive as I can. There is nothing stopping you from taking inspiration from the prompts to make something more mature just please don't tagg it as IBweek2023, swaring Is fine though...no smut is what I'm saying.

I Don't have a twitter (or X now...stupid musk) Account so this is gonna focused on tumblr but having said that if someone did want to take it upon themselves to post the header image and the rules to twitter then you have my go ahead but I won't be keeping track of stuff there.

Be nice to each other, any negativeness or harassment to others will ruin this for everyone, hopefully won't be an issue but you never know

IMPORTANT: not affiliated with @ineffablebureaucracyweek which is a gabriel x beelzebub week being run for Latino fans. I just don't want any confusion and ofcourse they have my support. Thank you!

Any other questions reach out to me on here or my main @whomadewaffles.

#ITS OFFICIAL!#ineffable bureaucracy #good omens #gabriel x beelzebub #ibweek2023 #lets goooo i hope people have fun with this!#mark your calendars cos from now on #everyday it's a getting closer #prompts in the image description for those who can't see the picture

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coff33notforme · 1 year

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The Actor falling in love

A/n: Shorter break than expected, but I probably won't get back to posting regularly right away, I wanted to do some simple headcannons but this became a whole ass fic, so I'll probably do more headcannons with Actor soon. Enjoy!

Pairing: Actor and Gender neutral Reader

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, being intoxicated, swearing, and a pinch of angst

Mark wouldn't realize he's in love, not for a long time, it might even take years for him to realize. But once he did it was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

Marks been your friend for seven years now. Frankly he's surprised you've stuck around for that long, but hes grateful, grateful you've decided to put so much effort into the greedy person that he is. Especially considering you didn't have the humblest beginnings.

Mark was a piece of shit, well he was to everyone, but it seemed he had a specific hatred for you, he detested you more than anyone else. As though your mere presence brought him complete and utter anguish.

So why would you choose to stay with him? Why did you beckon him closer, despite his protest.

Yet, no matter how much he pushed you away from him, you always seemed to come back. He wasn't comfortable with the idea of letting someone in, letting someone see all of him not just the cocky, ignorant facade he put up. Yet you ignored the red flags, you broke down his walls without warning. And begrudgingly he let you in.

And soon he felt every time you had to leave he only longed for you closer, he wanted to pull you back into him and never let you go. As selfish as it sounded, you completed him, you made him feel loved for who he was, not who he was supposed to be.

Whenever he was with you he felt complete, not like the half of a whole he felt when he sat by himself, not a shell of a man, that he was when he was lost in thought.

And the more time he spent with you the more his admiration for you grew, when you entered a room his heartbeat quickened, when you flashed him a smile his cheeks grew red, and when your hand brushed his he felt his head became dizzy.

He had grown to care for you more than he had cared for anybody, he felt like a better person when he was with you, you didn't make him feel like a bad person, you forced him to accept the bad parts of himself with the good. And at first it was horrifying, but you made it seem worth it. And thats when it hit him.

Fuck, he was in love with you

At first he tried to fight these feelings whenever you were near, he couldn't stop the hammering of his heart in his chest. He contemplated running, running from it, from you. But he couldn't. He needed you more than he realized.

And he couldn't bring himself to just disappear from your life, he didn't want to hurt you like that. But he couldn’t pretend he wasn’t in love with you, so he had two choices, he had to leave or he had to confess.

Mark felt a sensation of dread well up in his stomach, for days he contemplated every possible outcome, each scenario growing darker than the last. He had to tell you how he felt, even if it was selfish to hope that someone like you loved him, it was a risk he was willing to take, for his love for you was far greater than his fear of rejection.

He needed it to be casual, though his dramatic fantasy of kissing you on the beach the sun setting behind the two of you, the blend of orange, red, and pink creating the perfect backdrop. No, he couldn't get ahead of himself only to get his heart shattered.

He had invited you to dinner at his house, a simple meal shared between friends, everything was going well you’d spent the evening chatting, just enjoying each others company out on the balcony. That was until Mark had poured you two some wine, he just couldn't help himself.

It wasn't long till Mark felt like his head was lighter than air while his body felt heavier, as though he was glued to the chair.

While you talked you held your gaze among the stars above you twinkling brightly in the dark pool of blue. Mark couldn't help but zone out, enraptured in your beauty as you babbled on Mark didn’t even know what you were saying at this point.

But then you turned to meet his gaze, maybe it was the wine but he could have cared less that you caught him staring

You tilted your head at him your eyebrows furrowing in confusion

“Mark, are you okay?” you asked, his head bobbled drunkenly.

“You're so pretty, my love.” he slurred, his fears washed away by the wine in his hand. The man wore a lopsided smile, that tugged from one corner of his face to the other. Your eyes widened, before a sweet smile spread across your face as you chuckled lightly

"Okay, well I think you're drunk enough, time for bed." you whispered gently, taking hold of the wine in his hand and placing it on the table set up on the balcony.

You swung his arm around your neck hoisting him up as you dragged him off the balcony, though it took time and effort you managed to drag him into the kitchen, you propped him up against a chair, his body slumped over lazily while Mark let out a deep groan. You walked into the silent kitchen, opening a wooden cabinet to fetch Mark a glass of water that would, hopefully, sober him up.

You flicked the cold water on, watching the cup fill up as you glanced at the man slumped over on the dinning table. As the cup filled you switched the water off, walking to Mark you placed the cup down, taking a seat next to him as you pushed the water towards him.

Mark grumbled in response, lifting his head from the table to peer out at what had been shoved towards him, he frowned at the cup placed in front of him, sending you a fretful pout.

"What is this for?" he asked, his words jumbled together as he spoke.

"I need you to drink this Mark, or you're going to feel awful in the morning." you spoke in a hushed tone, like a mother cooing to her child. Mark frowned putting his head back down ignoring your concern. You sighed as you scooted closer to the stubborn man.

You lifted him up with a grunt, his body sat against the chair like he was a rag doll that had just been tossed across the room, in any other circumstance you would have found this amusing, maybe even cute. But right now Mark was being a pain in your ass.

"Mark, open your mouth please." without question the man opened his jaw, you grabbed the cup and placed it to his lips gently, pouring the liquid into his mouth.

"Swallow, all of it." you stated firmly. Again, Mark obeyed your instructions. Leaning back in his chair he threw his head back closing his eyes.

"If you want to sleep we have to go up the staircase." you said, earning another groan from the man. You deadpanned, feeling you, yourself groan at the man's antics.

Swinging his arm over your shoulder again.

Shit, This was going to be a lot harder

You thought to yourself as you gazed upon Mark's imperial staircase. Begrudgingly you began to drag the man up the stairs heaving, with each step, you looked up, you weren't even close to the top.

"Why are you so good to me?"

The question caught you off guard, it was uncharacteristically gentle, it felt sincere, which was a rare thing from the cocky man.

You looked down to Mark.

"What do you mean?"

There was a moment of silence, before the man spoke again.

"You're still here, my arrogant, selfish nature drives everyone away, they all leave. But not you, why?" his voice held a genuine sound of confusion.

"Well, I care about you, and I don't think any of those things about you. Sure you can be ignorant and sometimes even stubborn. But I still care a lot about you." and to this Marks head shot up a hopeful look dancing in his chocolate eyes.

"Do you love me?"

Your eyes widened, what could you say? You wanted to tell him the truth. Taking a deep breath, you turned your gaze to the top of the stairs now nearing closer than before.

"I do, I love you Mark." you mentally cursed at how your voice wavered. Mark let out a dramatic sigh, catching your attention.

"Oh love, you have no idea how long I've been waiting to hear those words from you."

And with that you had reached the top, looming down the dark hallway you hobbled into Marks room. Flicking the lights on, you dragged him to his bed laying him down on his velvety sheets. He looked so peaceful, his dark eyes resting, his face softening as his chest rose softly. You smiled, turning to leave the actor to rest.

You stopped as you felt a hand wrapped around your wrist. You turned to see Mark peering at you behind heavy eyes.

“Where are you going?”

"Downstairs to sleep."

Marks face fell, a pleading look in his eyes.

"You're not going to leave? Leave me?" he asked, his grip tightening.

You sighed, turning and crouching in front of the man.

"Of course not."

"Then would you please stay? Just for a little longer." he paused "I can't let you go."

You smiled, yawning feeling a bit tired yourself.

"Of course." you replied, standing up, and crawling over Mark as you laid beside him, resting your eyes, as you allowed yourself to fade into the darkness. It wasn't long until you felt arms wrap around you as, Mark's heart beat lulled you to sleep.

BRO THIS TOOK FOREVER, if you enjoyed please consider reblogging because that does more for me than just likes and I also like to read your comments in the tags <;33

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archiveikemen · 11 months

Text

'Black Wedding' Story Event: Chapter 1

William's Route

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On a peaceful early afternoon, long fingers danced across the black and white keys on the piano.

(... It sounds so beautiful. I love listening to Will play the piano.)

While I was captivated by the beautiful tune, my lover, the King of Self-Righteousness, spoke in a way that sounded like he was singing along to the tunes he played on the piano.

William: Kate, why don’t you marry me?

Kate: …

(Me and William. Married?)

The words that came from those shapely lips were so sudden that my words caught in my throat.

William: Oya, did I just get rejected?

Kate: T—

Kate: That’s not what I mean!

William: Hmm?

Kate: I was just surprised by how sudden it was…

(I think my heart nearly stopped beating…)

I placed my hand over my heart that was still going crazy, William looked at me and laughed.

William: Then we’ll wait till you’ve calmed down from the surprise.

(Getting married to William.)

I felt like I had been misled by those words that came out of his mouth…

(William loves freedom, I can’t believe he proposed the idea of marriage…)

Kate: Is there a reason for why you said that all of a sudden?

William: You’re as smart as ever.

William: While conducting investigations with Victor, we got some information on an organisation named “Amour”.

William: They’re based in a church, and claim to be able to “make love last for eternity”...

William: There have been several cases where the couples who approached that church in search of eternal love never returned.

Kate: … They never returned? Could it be…

William: It’s not that they never returned, but rather they can’t. They've probably been killed.

(What the…)

William: The killer is the head of the organisation, the Founder.

Kate: Why would he take those innocent lives…?

William: I wonder…?

(William definitely knows why.)

He shrugged his shoulders and didn't say a thing, the look in his eyes told me “if you want to know, find out for yourself”.

(Of course… that’s the plan.)

Will smiled in response to that implicit murmur and narrowed his eyes.

Kate: Whatever his reason may be, it’s Crown’s duty to condemn evil with evil, so that there won't be any more victims.

Kate: And as a fairytale writer… it’s my duty to write that down in the records.

William: Yes. That’s my lovely little robin.

His smile was so charming and uplifting.

(Whenever he looks at me like this, I feel like I can accomplish anything.)

He was the only person in this world who could make me feel that way.

Kate: So what does us getting married have to do with punishing Amour for their sins?

William: Amour holds weddings as the ceremony to grant couples eternal love.

William: And it appears that the Founder, who is the root of the problem, will only show himself then.

William: He’s so thorough in hiding, it’s clear that he has a guilty conscience.

Kate: So you're saying that we’ll infiltrate the organisation and have our “wedding”...

Kate: Then lure the Founder out?

William: That’s right. … Hearing the details might change your mind.

Kate: Huh…?

Will narrowed his eyes and twirled my hair around his finger.

William: The kiss of oath might turn into a bloodbath.

William: If having an upright wedding is your dream, it’s still not too late to turn back.

Will smiled while offering me an escape route.

(In the past, the message he’s trying to convey would’ve really been “you can do as you please”.)

(But now, perhaps…)

(He just wants to hear me tell him myself what I want.)

This selfish king with red eyes enjoyed loving my desires.

Kate: Of course I won’t turn back. I want to have that wedding ceremony with you.

Kate: Even if we get drenched in blood… that would be wonderful because it’d be a kiss of oath to never forget.

Will smiled happily and kissed the locks of hair he was fidgeting with.

William: … Then it’s decided.

…

While getting myself ready for our mission, I smiled as I thought back to what happened earlier.

(I never expected to ever hear Will ask me “will you marry me?”)

The thought of having a wedding ceremony was making me nervous, even though it was a pretend one.

And then it hit me.

(This… this is the first time I’ve been conscious about the possibility of marrying Will.)

I loved him so much that I was willing to give him my everything, both my body and soul.

(Maybe it’s because we’ve had many much more important things to be concerned about?)

He was destined to be destroyed one day.

As someone who loved him, I was bound to be consumed by that fate as long as I stayed by his side.

I was desperate to accept that reality, love each other, and remain by his side until the day I died.

(But what if we were to have a real wedding…?)

A wedding was a sacred ceremony for a couple to vow their love to each other.

For us, who have chosen to live in the darkness — who and what do we vow to?

…

Kate: … This church is beautiful…

The organisation was based in a church located outside of London.

The air of tranquillity made it feel as if it was a painting.

(I can’t believe people are being killed here…)

William: A dangerous organisation that reeks of blood, and having a pretend wedding with a villain…

William: … A rather pervasive situation you’re in. How are you feeling?

Kate: Honestly, I’m feeling nervous… but I’m also a little excited.

Kate: Of course, I’ll be careful not to put you in danger.

William: Fufu, my knight is still going strong today.

Kate: Kya…

He put his arm around my waist and pulled me to him like we were in a dance.

William: Like this, let’s show off to our hearts content.

Kate: Show off… show what off?

William: That we’re in love with each other.

William: Oh, I didn't tell you? Not everyone can hold their wedding here.

William: The followers of Amour have to acknowledge that we “truly love each other”.

William: We can’t just have a wedding.

Kate: So does that mean… our mission is a failure if we don't get acknowledged as lovers?

Will gave me an affirmative smile.

Kate: Then… we should flirt as much as we want… right?

(Flirting in front of others… that’s kind of embarrassing.)

(It’s to be able to spend time with Will while on a mission.)

William: Just do what you always do.

William: There won’t be any problems as long as you keep showing how adorable you are with your bright red whenever I hug you like this, Kate.

Kate: …!?

Will gave me a quick peck and let go of me.

William: Let’s go.

Kate: A-Alright…

(Will my heart… survive till the end of this mission?)

…

Cultist: Thank you very much for coming to our church.

Upon arriving at the chapel, we were greeted by several cultists dressed in white.

At first glance, they appeared good-hearted because of their calm smiles.

(But… all of their eyes aren't smiling. It looks as if their smiles are plastered onto their faces.)

According to Will, the main culprit who was doing the killings was the Founder.

Here, the Founder’s orders were absolute, and the cultists seemed to be blindly following them.

Cultist: So the two of you are looking to hold your wedding here.

William: Yes. I want to take her freedom away, so that my adorable lover can never fly away from me ever.

William winked.

My heart pounded hard upon hearing those words that William would never say, even if he really considered that.

(You're saying that sort of thing in this situation whereby there's no telling what’s true or false… that's not fair.)

Kate: I… I want to devote my entire life to him.

Kate: And… I want all of his “love”.

(What I just said is the truth, Will.)

William: …

As I spoke while looking into Will’s eyes, I saw his gaze grow passionate.

(Ah…)

It wasn’t an act, that gaze expressed his genuine love for me.

William: You should be more selfish, my bride.

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