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inmyheadimobsessed · 1 year

Text

I Can't Love You in the Dark

pairing: riri ✘ fem!udaku!reader

summary: given your siblings' over protective natures, you are forced to keep your relationship with riri a secret, but missing her calls for drastic measures. what happens when they find out? (requested by @melodykisses)

word count: 10.4k

contains: fluff, implied smut, protective!shuri, protective!t'challa, slight himbo!t'challa, shuri in her detective bag, lovesick!reader, lovesick!riri

tags: @verachii @szalipcombo @rxcently @coolestgay @widowmakker @fetchyourlife @blackgcomica @shurisbbymama @bestfriend491 @simp4iwaizumi @mocha-aya @shinsousliya @bratydoll @shuriswifereal @shuriri4life @shuris-whore @letitias-fav @axailslink @chidinma @xoxo-dede @yvxmpire @zayswriting

divider by: @firefly-graphics

note: ngl it took me forever to finish this because i kept crying whenever i had to write scenes with t'challa in them. i hope it turned out okay and i didn't completely botch his character lol. but i think it's cute and fun idk. as always shouts out to oomf for the translations. pls enjoy these words my brain concocted <333

translations: ndiyacela - please, ndikuthanda kakhulu - i love you so much, mtuwam - my person

Rainy days in Wakanda always brought with them nostalgia. Droplets pelted the grass in your garden as you sat perched by your windowsill, admiring the fall. The hammering rain remedied your mind, bittersweet memories playing on an extended loop. A necessary distraction from your existing reality. It was not heavy enough to be deemed a storm, there was no thunder, no lightning, but it had the same lasting effects on your mood.

Rain made you miss her. You missed her smile, her laugh. You longed to feel her lips against yours again, craved the wistful sensation they filled you with that last night she spent in your quarters.

She'd come to say her goodbyes. She was with Shuri moments before, collecting her things and being reunited with her father's car. You thought she'd leave without a word, seeing as your time together was barely enough to be considered anything. Stolen touches in the presence of your siblings, magnetic fingers ghosting over one another. A push and pull that never got the chance to connect, not completely.

You two would lock eyes in your sister’s lab from a distance, using yearning stares to convey what your words could not, what you wouldn't allow them to.

At the time she wanted more than you saw yourself able to offer, so assuming she would leave Wakanda without saying goodbye to you was an idea you made yourself comfortable with. Until she showed up that night while you sat on your balcony, nursing a cup of tea, and letting your mind spin on with thoughts of turmoil and loss.

“Heavy is the head.”

You whipped up at the sound of her voice, not believing it at first. Her warm half-smile brought you back down to Earth and out of your own thoughts. Seeing her, just merely looking at Riri standing in your doorway had your chest tightening and heart sprinting.

“I am afraid you must be thinking of my brother. T’challa is king, his head is heaviest.”

She chuckled slightly, moving closer onto the balcony. “I don't think Ima ever get used to how gorgeous it is here. You hear the stories, but they don't do it justice.”

Brown eyes marveled at the city lights before them, while you marveled at how the gleams illuminated her face. It was difficult to admire the city when someone else stole all of your attention just by being.

“Wakanda will miss your presence.” You sipped your tea, averting her eyes when she finally turned to face you.

“Here I was thinking y’all wanted me out for good. I mean I'm technically the reason all that shit went down anyway.” Her nervous laughter pulled your eyes to hers.

You stood, walking over to her, studying her features. You could see the guilt swirling in her pupils, how it lodged itself deep inside of them, darkening their hue. “None of what happened was your fault. No one blames you. You are a victim just as we all are.”

“I blame me.” It was a whisper, and it rocked your core. A flick of anger ran through you at the thought of her feeling even the slightest bit guilty, anger at those who created it. Everyone who made her think this way about herself was taken care of. It eased your conscience some, knowing she would not be bothered again. Yet you still wished there was something you could do to absolve her of the feeling, anything.

You tilted Riri’s chin with your index finger and she flinched. You’d hardly touched her since she'd been in your country, not in the way you wanted to. So her shock was warranted. The two of you were aware of the brewing emotions when in each other's presence. You liked it, wanted more of it, but you were also aware of your older siblings, and their overprotective natures.

You knew it would only intensify now with your mother gone, and being with Riri, or anyone for that matter, would make them wary.

“I want you to stop that. I do not blame you, and I will not have you leave me believing that I do.”

Riri gulped. This was the closest you'd ever let her be to you. “Leave you?”

“Are you not preparing to leave me? Isn't that why you've come? To say goodbye?”

She shook her head, stepping out from under your touch. “Nah, I'm leaving Wakanda. You made it clear you didn't want this, don't do that.”

She was wrong. So very wrong. You wanted her more than she knew, more than you yourself understood. But you couldn't have her, and she didn't get that. “Do what?”

“That. Don't act like I'm breaking your heart or some shit. You don't wanna be with me and that's cool, but don't make me feel like it's on me. I told you how I felt from jump, don't put this on me. Please.”

“It is not on you. Nothing is on you, I need you to know that, now and forever.”

She backed away slowly, frustration fueling her antics. “Ugh! You know ion like when you do that. You're making it seem like choosing to be with me is some huge task, like you want to but can't. It's either you do or you don't. You're in your own way, this don't got nothing to do with Shuri, or T’challa. It's you. You don't want this, you don't want me.”

“Riri I–”

“Nah. I came to say bye, like you said, and Ima do that. Cause you deserve that at least, and I'm big on treating folks in the way they deserve. So goodbye, have a nice life.” She tried to step through the door, but you grabbed her wrist, igniting that familiar pull. That magnetic buzz you two knew well.

You spun her to face you and her eyes widened. She attempted to tug away, she was quite adamant about it, but your hold was firm. You wouldn't let her walk away from you. Not this time.

“Don't.” She did not mean it. You’d grown to learn her tones, and this one was a plea not for you to stop, but one that begged for continuance. Riri wanted you to take it all the way, and her beautiful gaze told you as much.

When you kissed her the sky roared, shaking your world. It pelted the two of you with endless showers. You cupped her wet face amidst it all, pulling her closer, kissing her deeper. Passion seeped from within her into you, and you absorbed it all like your clothes did the rain. Soaking up all that Riri was had been a long-standing desire of yours for the last two months, and now you were drowning in it; you were drowning in her.

The rain still poured as you pulled away, but neither of you seemed to mind, neither of you seemed to notice. You were too caught up in the heat of each other as you watched the lightning reflect in her striking eyes. “To hell with my siblings. I do know what I want. I want you, Riri Williams.”

She nodded, kissing you again before tugging you into your room and ridding your bodies of your soaked clothing. You touched her everywhere that night, making up for lost time. It was something you both needed, something to solidify everything you felt for each other. No one had ever made you feel the way Riri did, and you needed her to know that.

Rain pounded at your windows, desperate and eager just as your lips were roaming her body, and it only added to the intensity floating inside your bedroom. You’d never felt more whole than in that moment.

“I am going to miss you terribly. Going to miss this.”

She put her bra back on before slipping into one of your tops. She kissed you then, less forceful now, still as heated. “I think you'll be aight for a couple of months.”

“Months?!?!”

Her laugh was loud and it roared from within her like the thunder outside. “Damn, I barely got my clothes back on yet and you already feening? Was it that good ma?”

You tossed a pillow at her and she gasped. “Shuri gave you Kimoyo beads?”

She held her wrist up, showing off the bracelet your sister crafted. “Good. I will be contacting you every day until I am able to see you again.”

“You real cute when you clingy, I like it better than you being detached and trying to ignore me.” You pulled her in again, pecking all over her face and she giggled. “But I really gotta go before Shuri comes looking for me and finds me half naked in your room. I been gone way longer than I said I’d be.”

Your eyebrows shot up as you were reminded of the risk you were taking. “You are right. She tracks me and watches me like a hawk. You should hurry.”

With one last kiss, Riri was out of your bedroom and heading back to America. And all you could think of was the way her mouth felt against every part of you, and how big your feelings for her were.

Every time it rained, your thoughts drifted, returning you to that night. That was your last time seeing her in person, feeling her, and you were suffering. You longed to be in her embrace again. Riri was a drug and your addiction only strengthened and grew incessant the more days you spent without her.

You’d kept your relationship a secret, fearing your siblings would not approve, especially now. At first it was thrilling, having something only you and Riri shared. And it was easy to conceal, being worlds apart.

But months of video chatting and vaguely explicit messages were no longer cutting it. You needed her with you, and it was something you were going to get. A plan hatched in your mind just as you heard soft rapping on your bedroom door.

You rolled your eyes. “Yes, I am awake. I am breathing. You may tell my brother that and you may leave me alone.”

“Who is to say I am not checking on your living status for myself?” Aneka stepped into your room then, grinning as she often did.

You spun to face her, sporting a bored expression. “As you can see, I am alive, and I am well.”

“Alive, yes. But you are not well. You have not been well since Miss Williams returned back to America.” She smirked when she caught your eyebrows shooting up, knowing she had you, but you were determined to prove her wrong. “What? Did you think I was unaware of your relationship?”

You deadpanned. “I have not been well since Shuri and T’challa decided I was a prisoner in my own home.”

“Ah, Princess, come on now. You are not a prisoner, they are only worried about you and want to keep you safe. As do I. We have all learned that we are not as protected as we previously thought ourselves to be.”

“Then why do I feel like I am a prisoner?” You challenged.

Aneka stepped closer to you, holding your gaze in that deathly intimidating way that she did. Despite her seemingly chipper demeanor, this stare she possessed, this daunting glare, it never failed to run your blood cold. The goosebumps on your forearms sparked instantaneously, like a knee-jerk reaction as she stood directly in front of you. Your breath hitched. “I can assure you, the life you live is in no way similar to the life of a prisoner, Princess.”

“Have I mentioned how unsettling it is when you stare at me like that?” Your attempt to keep the air light was acknowledged and she loosened her shoulders.

“You think so? I have been trying to perfect it, Ayo told me it isn't quite there, but I disagree.” She grinned. You respected Aneka a lot, and you respected her ability to shift from soldier to friend with ease.

You rolled your eyes with a huff, flopping onto your bed rather dramatically. “I'm glad you find this so amusing.”

“If you are so miserable without your scientist, why don't you make your case to go see her? I'm sure Shuri and T’challa would not mind you spending time with her, she and the Princess are friends after all.” You tried ignoring the buzz you felt at the words, your scientist. Riri was yours, all yours.

This made you sit up, a plotting grin hanging on your mouth. “Oh don't you worry about that, Aneka dear. I have that all figured out.”

“Now it is you who unsettles me, Princess. I want no part in whatever it is you are scheming. I will report to the King that you are awake.” With that, she picked up her spear and shifted out the door, leaving you alone to your own devices. Not a particularly logical thing to do, seeing as you had it in your mind you would be seeing your girlfriend soon. You and your devices would make sure of that.

•••

The Throne Room awakened memories you tried putting to bed. Months of avoidance, only for you to return now, reliving everything all over again. Gone was that homey feel it previously housed, in its place stood despair. Somehow the rain was aware of that. Crying skies depicted the emotions you felt being back here, your mood threatening to darken like the clouds outside.

It was quiet. No stirring apart from the gentle showers. Your brother was alone, as you hoped he'd be.

Stoic as ever, T’challa stood in front of the reinforced windows, palms tucked inside each other behind his back as he studied the foggy glass. You needed not to see his face to know he was contemplating, deep in his thoughts, swimming in them as he often did.

His whirring mind did nothing to conceal your presence from him. There was no doubt he sensed you coming before you even rounded the corner. “Do my eyes and ears deceive me?”

He watched you now, following your distorted silhouette through the glass as you strode toward him.

“They do not, My King.” His aura as intense as it was inviting, pulling you closer until your feet rested right beside his towering body. You joined him in his leisure, your own eyes falling to the streams of water racing each other down the surface.

"How are you?" His true concern buried deep under the question, and you answered as best you could, aware he was feeling similarly.

You bumped his shoulder with your own, grinning ever so slightly.

When he chuckled, it rumbled out of him from deep within. It was teasing, just as you expected. It was also comforting, cozy, washing over you and lightening your mood. “Have you come to ask me for something Shuri has said no to? If she has denied you, I am afraid there is nothing I can do to help you, Littlest Sister.”

He was bluffing and you knew it. Together, there was no negotiating with Shuri and T’challa. They worked as a unit to plot your untimely demise, as you were so fond of saying. Or rather Shuri worked, whilst T'challa merely followed her lead. The simple thought of your new ‘restrictions’ had your irritation flaring. No late night walks or drives alone, no venturing to the river without supervision, you had to be home at a certain time, no spending the night at your friend's.

Some were reasonable, you could admit that, and you understood their worry completely. But not allowing you to go shopping in the market without Aneka at your side was a tad overbearing. You were not a child, you could protect yourself just as well as they could. But once the two of them made up their minds together, that was final.

Which is precisely why you sought T’challa out alone. Of the two, he was easiest to manipulate. In Shuri's absence, you got what you wanted. She knew your tricks too well, having been the one to teach them to you. It was tougher for T’challa to say no to you and you took advantage of that.

“No. I have not seen Shuri today actually. Aneka was too busy, she could not cradle me in her arms like a baby and escort me to the lab.” You narrowed your eyes and his smile grew.

He tsked, deciding to play along. “That is too bad. I suppose since you have no supervision, I have no choice but to confine you to your room for the rest of the day, hmm?”

“I do not need supervision, Brother, as I've been saying for months.”

“Then what is it that you want? I am sure it’s something.”

Your gasp was dramatic as you clutched your chest, and it made him laugh again. “Do I have to want something to pay my Big Brother a visit?”

“Usually, yes. What else would bring you here, and have you address me as King, instead of what was it again? Oh yes, your jailer.”

You rolled your eyes, stomping your foot in the process. He still hadn't changed his stance, if he didn't see your pout and puppy dog eyes, you would be leaving here without the thing you came for. “Well now that you mention it, there is something I have come to discuss.”

“See, I knew it!”

“But! It is not for me, it's for Shuri.”

He turned to face you then, sporting a curious expression. Perfect, it was game time. “Well, I am sure you've noticed she retreats to her lab more often these days. You didn't hear this from me, but I think she sleeps there. It's worrisome. Not good for her at all.”

You embellished your concern, adding extra emphasis to certain words in attempts to keep his attention.

The two of you nodded in unison. “Yes, I have noticed this. You are correct, it is worrisome.”

“Right? I’d say maybe she should be the one constantly surveilled and not me, seeing as she's clearly losing herself in whatever it is she's working on over there. This new project of hers has truly been causing immense stress. It's not healthy, I think–”

T’challa snapped his fingers, losing patience with your rambling. “Your point, let us focus on that.”

“Oh yes! My point! The reason I am here! Well, I have a proposal that I believe can be good for her. Something, or rather someone, who can assist her, someone who gets her. A person who thinks similarly to the way she does.”

“And who is this person you speak of?”

A large smile spread across your face as you thought of her, her name escaping you coated in sheer adoration. Adoration you wanted to keep inside. But in order to carry out your plan, have it succeed, you would need to share it, reveal it only slightly to get your way. “Riri Williams.”

“Ah, yes. The American scientist. You believe she can help Shuri?”

You paced in front of him, your hands mimicking his behind your back. “Oh, I do, yes. They are both very intelligent, I believe they can help each other.”

“And how do you know this is something that either of them will want?” His eyes followed you, watching you walk back and forth.

“Well, I can assure you, Big Brother, this is something Miss Williams and I have discussed for quite some time. She wants to return to Wakanda and I would love– I mean, I think Shuri could benefit from her being here.” You cleared your throat and tried to ignore the smirk on your brother's face.

Your demeanor displayed the utmost confidence. You rocked perfect posture and spoke with worry-drenched words, but still, there was a storm brewing inside you.

Your heartbeat stuttered with every sentence, sweat dampened your forehead the longer you stood under T'challa's skeptical gaze. He knew there was something deeper going on than your concern for Shuri, but you had to sell it the best you could.

“Is that so?” That smile on his face told you he was not at all convinced by your sentiment. But you did not need to be convincing, you only needed his permission.

You nodded with a hard smile and faux desperation. He could not break you, you wouldn't let him. “Yes.”

“You and Miss Williams speak often?” Something in his tone dipped and so did your stomach.

“We are friends. Can I not have friends?”

T’challa threw his hands up and you exhaled softly, an indication that he would not be pressing you any further.

“I do not believe that this is entirely for Shuri, you’re not that selfless,” You feigned hurt and he laughed, scratching his beard. “But I will allow it. I quite like Riri, let her know she is free to visit whenever she may like.”

“You wound me, Big Brother. But I quite like Riri as well, and so does Shuri, obviously. Which is why I have decided to arrange her visit for this weekend.”

You beamed, and he squinted at you. “Oh, Littlest Sister, this is where you reveal the part of your plan I will not like, right?”

You bobbed your head up and down before speaking. “I was thinking since this is a surprise for Shuri, I could accompany Aneka on the trip? It would be good for Miss Williams to be greeted by a familiar face you know. She doesn’t know Aneka as well as she knows me. It would make her more comfortable.”

You threw your arms around him before he could protest, pulling back to gaze at him with the most gentle, pleading eyes you could muster. “You've already said she can visit, I just want to make sure her journey here is safe. This would make you my favorite big brother in the world!”

“I’m your only brother. And I did not agree to this. This was not the idea you pitched to me. No, Aneka can retrieve her on her own.”

“Please? Please can I go? I've been cooped up in this palace for months, I just want to greet my friend. Say yes, please?”

He shook his head in defiance. “No. And that is final. I will not risk your safety. Out of the question.”

Your arms were around his neck again as you begged, yanking hard and promising to take extra precautions. You felt T’challa relax under you and a devious smirk formed on your lips, dripping triumphantly. You’d won.

“Fine. But Shuri cannot know, do you hear me?”

You zipped your lips and locked them, tossing the imaginary key over your shoulder. Your smile still housed those doe eyes, and he shook his head.

“Go. Before I change my mind.”

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”

You skipped off then, humming to yourself on your stroll back to your quarters. Excitement and anticipation bubbled in your chest at the thought of seeing your girlfriend again. Your longing daydreams of holding her and kissing her would soon become a reality and you felt like you were going to burst.

•••

“Where you going? You look pretty.” The holographic image of Riri’s face examined your expression. You were on your way to surprise her, and it was getting harder to conceal your joy the longer you spoke to her.

You smiled with a light blush, getting lost in her eyes. “Oh, I’m just heading to Shuri’s lab with my babysitter.”

Aneka’s groan was loud enough for Riri to hear and she laughed. “Well, I miss you baby. I wish you were coming to see me.”

“I miss you too, my love.” Riri stretched and you bit your lip at the sight of her in only a sports bra.

When she caught your reaction, she smirked. “You miss me? Or you miss something else, ma?”

“I do not appreciate what you are implying here.” Your voice lowered to a whisper as you eyed Aneka cautiously.

Riri laughed again and the mere sound of it soothed you, making it exceedingly hard to be annoyed with her. “I got the texts to back it up too. Remember when you said, ‘I just want to feel your mouth on m-’”

“Okay! We’ve arrived at the lab, I will talk to you later! Love you, bye!” You swiftly ended the call, hanging your head in embarrassment. Riri’s candor would never be a thing you got used to, you’d found. It was something you loved about her, her openness, but it never failed to shock you.

Aneka turned her head slightly as she spoke to you. “If only the King knew what he agreed to when he allowed you to go on this trip. I told you to leave me out of it, now I have to be subjected to these displays.”

“Ugh! How much longer until we are there? Can’t be trapped in here with you for another minute.” You huffed and she returned her attention to flying the aircraft.

“I can turn it around, you know?” Her words rendered you silent, and you remained that way for the rest of the flight. It was easy to discern from the self-satisfied smirk on her face that Aneka was pleased with her ability to shut you up. You were too excited to see Riri to challenge her anyway, even if you were sure her threat was indeed false.

“We are here.”

Stepping off the Talon Fighter, each breath you drew dried your mouth out, nerves beginning to get the best of you. This was not your first time in America, but it was your first time in Boston, and your first time being in Riri’s world.

Your mind trailed back to when you’d learned of Shuri’s kidnapping the last time she was here, along with Riri. Terror grew inside you that day at the thought of never seeing your sister again. You feared for Riri too, though you hadn’t known her then.

Now it was impossible to envision not knowing her. She took up so much space in your life, and did so gracefully over the span of months.

Your anxiety grew the closer you inched to her dorm room, treading through the sea of students littering the hall. You stood in front of her door then, and you knocked, anticipation clawing at your throat. Trembling fingers fidgeted at your sides as you waited. Seconds felt like hours, ticking by slower than molasses moved, and you allowed the intrusive thoughts to trample your mind like a stampede of elephants.

Did your hair look okay? You’d gotten your Bantu Knots redone that morning, just for her. What if she hated them? What if months apart made her realize she was no longer interested in you? Was she even home? Did she meet someone else? Maybe that was why she hadn’t answered the door yet. Perhaps she was no-

The door swung open and a rather sweaty-looking Riri stood before you: eyes wide and lips parted as her chest heaved. Post-workout looked amazing on her.

She hadn’t moved, nor had she uttered a word, her slow blink recognized as shock. You found yourself at a loss for words as well, taking her in fully for the first time in far too long. The two of you got lost in each other's eyes, as you often did. Staring down at her ignited that pull you’d been craving for months. Your eyes flickered to her lips, and she nodded, still unable to speak. You knew what she wanted, you wanted it too, yearned for it, even if you couldn’t find the words to say it.

You leaned in, smashing your lips to hers and fireworks exploded at the connection. Kissing her awoke a hunger inside your sternum. Riri hopped up, wrapping her legs around your waist and you backed the both of you into her room before kicking the door shut. Her back was on the bed shortly after as you hovered above her, lips still locked. Breathing was an afterthought. You only wanted more of her, all of her.

“You lied to me.” She managed in between hard pecks to your throat. Your hands roamed her sides and her exposed stomach as you moaned into her touch. “Said you was going to Shuri’s lab.”

“I know. Surprise.” Your lips met her chest and she shuddered with a giggle. Her whimpers drove you mad and you tugged on her leggings. “Off.”

She obliged without a beat of hesitation, and you slithered down her body, leaving a trail of hot, wet kisses down her abs on your way to your final destination.

You rolled beside her, exhaling loudly and she laughed into your side. “You are radiant, do you know that?”

“You aight too, I guess.” You gasped and pinched her thigh, bringing forth a whine. When you shifted to face her on the mattress, you found her shiny eyes already on you. The sight warmed your insides. Feeling the heat radiating from her sweaty body pulled you in, that neverending attraction working overtime to weave you two together. Being by her side mended parts of you you did not know were fractured, and you felt whole again. Riri made you whole.

Words were still scarce as you lay next to her panting body, the dim light casting shadows over that face that stole your breath away.

“What are you thinking about?” Riri’s gentle voice was like a song, and you got caught up in its melody.

“You. How much I missed you. How much I love you.” You watched the words wash over her and she grinned, making your heart flutter in that way only she could. You’d said your first real ‘I love yous’ two months ago, and now you couldn't stop.

Riri sat up, pulling her knees to her bare chest, head resting on them as she watched you intently. “How are you here right now?”

“As I said, I missed you and I wanted to see you.”

“Right, but how are you here? Thought T’challa and Shuri had that ass on lockdown.”

You rolled your eyes with a faint smile. “I think I have proven that when it comes to you, I am willing to defy everyone and everything in the world.”

“Damn, okay Princess. So how long you staying?”

“I’m not. You are coming with me.”

You watched the confusion flash across her face. “To Wakanda?” You nodded and she scrunched her nose.

“I got class on Monday baby. I can’t just-”

“I will have you back here in time for your classes. Now, get dressed and gather your things. Aneka is waiting.”

Riri did as she was told, grabbing a bag from her messy closet, stuffing clothes into it. “So you flying me to another continent? Just for the weekend? Is that what I’m hearing?”

“Yes.” Your answer was matter-of-fact and simple, and you could tell she was having a hard time believing it.

She slung her bag over her shoulder nonetheless and waited by the door for you to lead the way. “Ion know how I be forgetting I’m dating a literal Princess. Like powerful kingdom and rich as hell type Princess. How do I forget that?”

You laughed, grabbing her fingers and lacing them into yours. The static shock did not cause either of you to jump, instead, you latched on tighter. “It’s because I am quite humble, what can I say.”

“Or I’m just so obsessed and in love with you alone, I block out all the unimportant stuff. Like how rich you are.”

You beamed down at her clinging to your arm. “I think I like that reason better.”

“While we on the subject, just how rich are y’all over there? Gimme like ballpark or something.”

Your chuckle was hearty as the two of you boarded the ship hand in hand and you shook your head.

•••

The trip home seemed to be shorter than the one leaving. Riri was all over you the entire time: sitting in your lap, kissing your face, whispering sweet nothings into your ears, and making you giggle with her corny little science jokes.

“Okay, okay you gon like this one. What do you call it when a biologist takes a photo of themself?”

Your eyes rolled and you sighed. “I don't know.”

“A cell-fie.” She laughed in that over-exaggerated way she reserved only for you and slapped her knee. It was your own fault really, you’d made the mistake of telling her science and humor did not mesh well, so it became her mission to prove you wrong.

“That was awful.” You responded with a fond smile.

She pushed off you and you attempted to pull her back. “Man whatever. That shit was hard, you just wouldn't get it. Shuri would laugh.”

“Speaking of my darling sister. She doesn't exactly know you are coming.”

Riri quirked a brow, and you heard Aneka huff a soft laugh at your confession. “What are you talking about?”

“Well… in order to get my brother to agree with you coming here, I was forced to tell a few white lies. One of which included me telling him I was bringing you here as a surprise for Shuri.” Your grin did nothing to shift her frown.

“And what does that mean for us? This isn't gon be like the first time I was here right? Because that was just, no. I ain't doing that ag–”

You reached for her hands, trying to ease her unrest. “No! Of course not. You would only have to spend some time with her in the lab. And given her current state, it is highly probable that she'll kick you out almost immediately. Then we may spend the weekend together. Trust that I have thought this through, mtuwam.”

“Okay… if you say so.” It was evident she was still a bit uneasy, so you kissed her lips gently, hoping to soothe her.

“Princess, we are home.”

Reentering Wakanda’s borders was an activity you could never grow bored of. Your home was marvelous, and being reminded of that was an amazing feeling.

Letting go of Riri’s hand proved to be a difficult task. You kept grabbing it and pressing kisses to her knuckles, prolonging your stay on the ship. T’challa was waiting to greet you as you landed and you made sure to stand a reasonable distance from Riri, though her body called to you.

“I see you have made it back in one piece. I must admit, I didn't think the odds would be in your favor, Littlest Sister.”

“Comedy does not suit you, Big Brother, I would stick to sulking on the throne if I were you.”

He laughed, then his eyes drifted to Riri perched patiently beside you. “So happy to have you back with us Miss Williams. I'm sure Shuri will be as well.”

“Happy y’all invited me. Wakanda is dope as hell, I love it here.” Her response was genuine and it filled your chest with pride. You met her gaze for a split second longer than intended and you couldn't help but grin. Damn those striking eyes of hers.

You cleared your throat, excusing yourself to help Riri settle in and T’challa nodded. “Give me your bag dear.”

It was a whisper soft enough only for the two of you to hear, and you hoped the gesture wouldn't seem too off. You were simply being hospitable. There was no way you were letting Riri carry her own bag, not when your hands were ready and available.

Your hands brushed at the exchange, longing fingers lingering lovingly. You felt eyes on the two of you as you walked away, but when you turned, there was no one.

“And the best part is my room is right down the hall. So you can sneak out at night to visit me. Or I can visit you, whichever you prefer.” You’d just gotten Riri settled in one of the palace's spare rooms.

She only beamed at you, pulling you in by your waist and you laughed. Her hands on your body just felt right. She was on her tippy toes then, kissing you long and deep, and you molded into her. Her fingers traced the hem of your skirt, climbing higher and higher up your thigh.

She shoved you onto the bed with force and you groaned. “Riri.”

“Just go with it.” She was on your lap soon after, wet mouth roaming your exposed neck as she created bruises that were sure to last.

You moaned, allowing your fingers to find her hips. “We can't.”

“You sure?” Her head was descending lower and you wanted her to keep going, every muscle in your body wanted to guide her, but you couldn’t. Not now, not with the Dora posted outside the room door, and not when you were supposed to be sticking to your plan. You knew T’challa would be checking in soon and you needed to head to Shuri’s lab immediately to avoid further suspicion.

“Ayo is outside, and T’challa could stop by at any time. I do not want to risk anything. Besides, we must go see Shuri now.”

Riri groaned but got up, once again allowing you to lead the way. You laughed at her and she stuck out her tongue. Bast, you had to be the luckiest person on Earth, with the cutest girlfriend on Earth.

“You sure Shuri’s in here? It ain’t usually this dark.” The two of you entered your sister’s lab. It was empty. Her playlist drowned out the sounds of her soft snoring, but they got louder the closer you inched to her.

“Oh, she is certainly in here. Griot, the lights please.”

The AI obeyed, lighting up the space to reveal a sleeping Shuri at one of the workstations. She was still in her clothes from the day prior, same lab coat too. Her curls were wild and frizzy from not being tied down and there was a small amount of drool on the side of her mouth.

“Yo, did she sleep here?” Riri walked closer to where you stood in front of your sister and you nodded. “Do we wake her?”

“In due time, my love, in due time.” You snapped a selfie of you and her sleeping form, mentally bookmarking it for later use. Your girlfriend shook her head next to you and your lips curved. “Now we wake her.”

Your finger met her cheek and you poked, but she did not stir. Then a thought struck you and you did everything to hold in your laughter.

“Shuri! You will never believe this, wake up! Tems has followed you back, look!”

This jolted her awake, and you took note of the candy wrapper stuck to the other side of her face. “She what? The love of my life has noticed me? Where? Show me!”

“Yeah, she did not actually notice you, but could you imagine? Tems is not thinking of you, dear sister. Just needed to wake you is all, seeing as you slept here again after you said you wouldn't.”

Shuri narrowed her eyes, looking you up and down curiously. “I would much rather sleep here than in the same place as my lying and deceitful sister. You cannot joke like that, you know how much I love her.”

“Right…” She pinched your arm and you yelped. "Ouch! What is your problem?!"

“Speaking of lies and deception, I will give you one chance to tell me where you went this morning, I lost signal on your Kimoyo beads for a few hours.”

Your groan was to be expected, and it did not soften her accusing tone. You knew Shuri would be tracking you, which is why you switched them off the moment you were outside the border. “I am not a child, you know. I can come and go as I please.”

“No. You cannot. Now tell me where you went and who you were with.”

Riri poked her head out from behind you after minutes of going unnoticed by your sister. She waved shyly with a smile. “She actually came to get me. Heard you was working on something that had you stressed, and your sister thought I could help.”

She reached up to pluck the wrapper from Shuri’s face and you swallowed your laughter.

“Riri! I've missed you! I honestly did not see you standing behind her. Sometimes I forget how short you are.” She pulled the smaller girl in for a hug and you snarled.

Annoyance bustled within you, the need to protect Riri taking hold of your thoughts and actions. “Hey! She is not that short. You’re one to talk.”

Shuri tilted her head, startled by your outburst, and your attempt to play it cool was rendered useless when you caught Riri’s sly smirk, clearly pleased with your defense. You fought your own smile, ignoring the awkward tension floating above the three of you. You prayed desperately for it to dissolve, fearing Shuri’s comments if it did not. “Okay then, that wasn't weird at all. Where is your sense of humor sister, geez? But anyway, Riri, yes I could use your help. I have not slept in my bed in days.”

“We can tell.” You retorted and she attempted to smack you.

“Uh yeah, how can I help?” It took nothing for them to completely zone out, wholly consumed by their work.

Though your presence was neglected soon after, the sight of the two most important women in your life bonding warmed your entire heart. You did not think it possible to love Riri more, but witnessing the smile she brought to Shuri’s face, seeing the way her eyes lit up, made you aware of how wrong you were. Loving her was limitless. It was so easy for her, lifting the spirits of others, being generous with her mind and time. She filled you with joy and pride, every ounce threatening to seep out of you.

You were staring, and you knew it, but it was not a thing that could be helped. Being so enamored with all that Riri was, you were oblivious to Shuri’s eyes darting between you and the young scientist you ogled across the lab.

Riri’s presence was enveloping like that, it toweled around you, muffling everything that wasn’t her.

“I think I'm going to call it a night. Going to actually sleep in my bed for once. Riri you are welcome to stay here as long as you like, I’m sure my sister would be happy to keep you company.” Something in her tone of voice sounded off, but it was difficult to pinpoint.

Riri nodded, turning back to the blueprints on the interface.

“Be safe, please.” Shuri kissed your head, smiling softly before leaving.

It wasn’t long before Riri took advantage of your aloneness, leaping onto you like a bunny. Her mouth was all over you, and you were a mess underneath her. She gripped your ass and you shrieked. “Riri, not here, we can't.”

“When you gon give me a chance to show you just how much I missed you, ma?” She kissed your stomach, pulling a tired moan from the back of your throat.

She knew just how to get you worked up, touching and kissing all the right spots. “Okay, fine. But it cannot be here.”

The two of you were giggling messes as you tiptoed through the silent palace. Riri pulled you into a secluded hallway, nipping hungrily at your jaw. Her tongue lapped over the bruises decorating your neck, amplifying your need for her. You smirked down into her lust-filled eyes. She would take you right here, and you were prepared to let her.

“I want you.” Her fingers were already under your skirt and you whimpered at the contact. Your heart came alive in your chest, batting against you from the thrill of it all.

A heated kiss muffled your moans as you writhed under her. “Shhh baby. You gon get us caught.”

It was difficult, and Riri was terribly skilled with her fingers. You were both gone off each other, so inebriated that the footsteps approaching the dark corridor went unnoticed. Someone cleared their throat and you jumped. Your stomach flipped, and your heartbeat revved into overdrive. Thrill melted away, dissolving into gut-wrenching dread.

You ripped your wet lips from Riri’s and turned to face the mystery person. The two of you were distraught and out of breath as Ayo inched closer. “Princess? Is that you? What are you doing out this late? The King–”

“I will head to my room now! No need to involve my brother!” The shake in your voice was noticeable, and her eyes widened when she caught sight of kiss-blown Riri tucked nervously behind you.

“Oh! Um, my apologies Princess. I was not aware you were not… alone. But please, head to your quarters. If I have found you, anyone can.” You tried ignoring her admonishment, but she was correct after all. Taking this kind of risk could have ended a lot worse, T’challa could’ve found you, Shuri. You knew better. It was reckless, but when Riri was in your head, thinking straight was a battle, a losing one.

She dipped her head, leaving you and your girlfriend alone. Your laughs were instant after, and you slapped your palms over each other's mouths. “Ooh, you in trouble Princess.”

“Stop it! Come on, let's go.” You tugged her to your quarters, fully intending on finishing what was interrupted moments ago.

•••

Waking up with Riri next to you was a feeling you needed to know forever, you’d decided. In the dark of the night, she'd tucked herself into your side, head on your chest as small snores escaped her. Being deprived of this sight, this warmth, for as long as you were was criminal.

She nestled closer and it just about brought you to tears. A soft kiss to her temple pulled her from slumber and she frowned, stunning brown eyes finding yours instantly. “You woke me.”

“With a kiss.”

“I ain't sleeping beauty.” She glared at you, it was so cute you just had to kiss her again.

Your chuckle was immediate as you stared at her arms, still wrapped around your torso with zero plans of letting go. “You are beautiful when you sleep, so I disagree. You're quite the sleeping beauty.”

“Corny.”

Rapid knocking at your door hindered your response and you panicked. It was far too early for Aneka to be checking on you. You leapt out of bed frantically with your sheet wrapped around your naked body, fearing it was one of your siblings. “Who is it? I am not yet decent.”

“It is just me, Princess. Thought I’d come to check on you a bit earlier, in case you needed help sneaking a certain scientist out of your quarters.”

You sighed loudly. “I don't need–”

“Do not lie, Princess. I am aware of where she spent the night. Your little run-in with my wife last night has made me privy to many things.”

You heard Riri giggle behind you and you huffed. “We are fine, Aneka. Your assistance is not needed.”

“Very well. Oh, and Shuri would like to see Miss Williams in her lab later today. Something about their project. And, be cautious, ndiyacela.”

It was unclear if Aneka’s concern about your relationship remaining a secret was out of love for you, or fear of losing her job. But knowing her, it could very well be both. When she left, you crawled back into bed, pulling Riri atop you, cradling her body ever so delicately in your arms. She tucked her head beneath your chin, meshing well with your skin there.

A puzzle, the pair of you were, you fit just right. Tender fingers massaged circles into her back, causing her to coo into your ear. If given the choice, you'd stay this way forever, making her frame an extension of your own.

“We have got to get up eventually, mtuwam.”

This caused her to groan and snuggle closer into you. “Don't wanna.”

“If we do not get up, someone will come looking for us. Most likely Shuri herself, if she's requested to see you.”

Riri held you tight, still refusing to budge. You had no desire to move either, having made a home under her warmth. But alas, like a wolf, you had to blow it down, leaving her bare skin exposed to the cool of the room.

Her little huff of annoyance was adorable as she shifted back to the side of the bed she slept on, and you got up. “So does this mean you won't join me in the shower? That is too bad. I remember how much you enjoyed the water pressure when you were here last.”

Riri’s head rose from the covers excitedly, tripping over the sheets as she ran into your arms.

After your shower activities, you and Riri found yourselves battling to keep your hands off of each other in the elevator down to Shuri's lab, touching her only enabled your growing addiction.

The lights were dimmer than usual when you stepped off, it was quieter too, no music or buzzing chatter of her team. Weird. There was always movement during the daytime.

“Shuri?” You called into the darkness, but silence greeted you. It all felt off; ominous, and you did not like it.

Riri tugged on your arm. “Ion think she's here babe.”

“Oh, but she is here… babe.” A shadow moved toward you and you squinted, eyes adjusting to Shuri as she stopped in your direct line of sight. T’challa was not far behind, face contorted into what you believed was meant to be a scowl. “See. I told you, Brother, if I sent word for Riri, our darling sister would be in tow as well.”

Shit.

Your eyes passed quickly to Riri, who seemed more confused than anything. You, on the other hand, were on the verge of collapsing. The drumming in your chest blared in your heated ears, blocking out the sound of Shuri’s ranting. T’challa had not yet addressed you, his eyes merely fanned you disappointedly, which somehow made it all worse. Shit. Shit. Shit.

“Answer my next question truthfully or so help me…” Shuri wiped her palms down her face with an exasperated sigh, thickening the atmosphere with the air her body expelled.

“Are you two,” She wagged her finger between Riri and yourself. “You two are… Bast, Brother I cannot even say the words.”

She was being theatrical, honestly. When Shuri got like this it was hard to get her to listen to reason, but reason escaped you, so either way you were screwed. You passed a glance at your girlfriend, whose eyes seemed particularly fond of the shiny floors. Every bone in your body wanted to comfort her, needed to reassure her, but you froze, your feet planting deep roots in the ground, prohibiting your movement.

“Littlest Sister, is it true? What Shuri has told me about you and Miss Williams? Are you two… involved? You wouldn’t lie to me, would you?” T'challa spoke at last as Shuri paced.

Involved? Involved made it sound so formal, so dated, like the two of you were in your forties. You were not involved, you were in love. Admitting that would only escalate things now though, so you bit your tongue and hung your head in shame. You had to hand it to him though, pulling out the doting brother card was almost enough to crack you.

Neither of you spoke, fearing too much the outcome. Riri’s discomfort buzzed off her and onto you as though it was your own. Not easing it was enough to fracture you again, undoing all the rebuilding you’d done in the past twenty-four hours. She stood silently, fidgeting with her fingers, intending on following your lead like usual, but you were all out of moves.

“Take her silence as an answer Brother.” Shuri’s unyielding glare made you flinch. Under any other circumstance, you’d find her behavior amusing, but her ability to intimidate had grown more effective after ingesting the heart-shaped herb.

You cleared your throat, finally gaining the courage to speak and you felt hopeful eyes on you, Riri’s eyes. “Why are you doing this?”

“Answer the question, liar.”

A laugh climbed your throat as Shuri spat her sentence at you, but you swallowed it. “And what is it that you presume I've lied about?”

Your question was only to gauge their knowledge, to see just how much you could twist your already existing string of lies before it snapped completely and forever.

Shuri tapped her chin dramatically. “Hmm, well let us see. Should we start with the original lie you told to get her here? Disguising it as a surprise for me,” T’challa nodded beside her, cosigning the entire ordeal. “But that one is more on you, Brother, for not catching it.”

“Hey now! In my defense, I was truly concerned for you when I agreed to Miss Williams coming here.”

“You were a fool is what you were. You fall for her tricks all the time, it's sad. I’m sorry, but it is.”

T’challa scoffed. “Can we please focus? I am not the one in trouble here.”

“I'm just saying, if only you had run this past me, instead of blindly agreeing, this could have been avoided altogether.” Shuri’s expressive hands spoke with her, just as frantic, just as accusing.

“Well–”

Your anxiety dissipated the longer you watched the two of them bicker, who the ring leader was, was clear as day. You passed a glance at Riri, discreetly squeezing her hand for a few seconds.

“Oh! Did you see that?! Let's get back to you deceivers, eh? Seeing the way you defended her when I called her short did not concern me much, it was odd, but not concerning. Now, the way you ogled her, that, raised my eyebrow.”

She paced some more, condemning you with each stride. “I knew that look, it’s the same look I sport when Tems uploads a new photo. But it was not quite enough, no. It could be explained away.”

Shuri stopped, regarding Riri’s puzzled exterior before turning her focus to you. “And that brings me to my next piece of evidence,” Her fingers lowered the collar on your button-up and you cursed under your breath. “Brother, what do these look like to you?”

He jolted to attention, clearly unaware his input would be warranted. “Um, I believe those are hickeys.”

“Hickeys.” The word rancid on her tongue. “I noticed them when I kissed you goodnight. Now how would my little sister get hickeys on her neck? They weren’t there the day before, but conveniently appeared when Riri arrived.”

“I saw you take her bag as well. Yesterday when you returned, you carried her bag, you may not have thought I saw it, but I did. Shuri, tell them.”

Shuri rolled her eyes at him. “Yes, T’challa saw the stupid bag. The point is we know about you two. We know everything. And there is more.”

“More? What more?” T’challa seemed just as perplexed as you and Riri, eyeing Shuri in anticipation.

She held up her wrist, displaying a rather incriminating video on her beads. T'challa’s gasp was as loud as it was comical. It was of the both of you, in the lab last night. Your mouth on hers, hands in places they shouldn’t have been. Your blush crept up the back of your neck, stretching across the span of your body. You felt it in your stomach, your toes, it even slithered itself into your mouth. Bitter and dry, and scarce of compassion.

“I needed to be sure of my suspicions, so I turned on the cameras before I left. What do you have to say for yourselves? Lying will not save you now, we have seen everything.”

“Everything.” T’challa repeated, waving his finger in your faces.

You locked eyes with your girlfriend again, communicating without words. “Fine. You've caught us.”

“I knew it!”

Shuri’s glower was a bullet of irritation, and she smacked T’challa in the head. “Of course you knew it, genius. I told you this before they arrived.”

“Right. You did, yes.”

Your laugh evaded you before you could stop it and you were met with the same look your brother received. “So you find this funny?”

You shook your head. “Sorry, no. This is all very serious. Serious allegations, serious evidence. Carry on.”

“How long?”

“A few months.”

She squinted. “How many months?”

“Seven.”

They both widened their eyes at your confession, and T’challa slapped his hand over his mouth, bewildered. “You have been lying to us for seven months?!?! So this started before you returned to America?”

Her question darted to Riri, and she waited expectantly for an answer. “Yes.”

Your brother shook his head, mirroring Shuri because of course he did. “You are too young to be involved with anyone.”

“Exactly. I forbid it.” Shuri threw her hands up as if her word was final. You refuted her statement with a quickness, under no circumstances did she get a say in your love life. Before you knew it, you were in a screaming match with your siblings, a rare occurrence, but you would not back down.

“You can't forbid me from loving your sister Shuri.”

The yelling subsided, three royal heads whipping around to face Riri. You had not expected that, you hadn't expected her to say anything. It was your mess, not hers. Your lies.

“Loving her?”

Riri stepped forward, gripping your fingers tightly, and for the first time, the shock startled you. “I love your sister. I'm in love with her. And if I'm speaking out of turn my bad, but forbidding us from being together ain't gon work because I’m not giving her up, not ever,” She observed them cautiously before continuing.

“Now I understand why there might be cause for concern, I get it, after what y’all went through, being protective is justified. But trust that I wanna protect her too? I want her safe, I want her sound, and I want her loved. I love her so much, too much, and ion wanna have to do that in secret. I don't wanna have to hide. Because your sister deserves more than that.”

T’challa was the first to wipe his tears. “Shuri, maybe we are being too harsh. They seem happy, hmm?”

“Was that rehearsed or did it all just come to you right now?” Her unrelenting glare was beginning to falter.

“Can't rehearse how I feel Shuri, I just… feel.”

Shuri's watchful eyes were on you, you felt them, but you only had the strength to focus on one thing, so you chose Riri. Her words rearranged every cell in your body, rendering you entirely and utterly speechless. Coherence was a thing you no longer knew as you stood dumbfounded, watching her, learning her all over again. For a moment you zoned out, forgetting where you were and how you’d gotten there.

“And what have you to say, Sister?”

“I-I love her too. She means everything to me. She is my person. I choose Riri, I will always choose Riri.” Gazing into her eyes felt different this time, more honest, more open; though they sucked you in all the same.

Shuri gagged. “You two are gross, but I suppose I can allow this, seeing as I trust you both,” She turned to Riri then. “But if you ever hurt her, and I mean in any way, I will create a virus so complex and otherworldly to infiltrate and destroy every piece of technology you own, including your suit. Maybe even while you're in it, zipping around in the sky. Then bam!"

She slammed her fist on a table with force, cracking it in half and you both jumped, blinking in disbelief. T'challa's snicker was muffled behind you and you shot him a look.

"Just because we are friends doesn't mean I won't demolish you in the name of my little sister. I will end you, in every way I know how. And trust that I know many.”

Riri gulped, clearly shaken by Shuri’s tone shift. “That's fair, I respect that.”

“Now I may not be as harsh with my words as my little sister, but I do agree with everything that was just stated. Do we have an understanding?” Your brother’s hands were on Riri’s shoulders and she bobbed her head. “Good. You two may go, enjoy the rest of your weekend, I will deal with Shuri. Make sure she calms down.”

You wasted no time, scurrying off and onto the elevator, wanting desperately to escape your siblings.

•••

The evening breeze was brisk, and it cooled your tea as you watched the city lights flicker on. The sweet aroma of her leave-in conditioner greeted you before she did, wafting deep inside your nose and clinging to your senses. You smiled when she emerged on your balcony.

“We suck at being in a secret relationship.” Riri sat in your lap and you gripped her waist.

“Absolutely horrible at it.” Her eyes were the softest you'd ever seen them, leaking with vulnerability and want. “Perhaps our love is not meant to be concealed, mtuwam.”

Her lips curved upward, delighted by your admission. “Say more words like that.”

“I want to love you in the open. I want the world to know you are mine and I am yours, truly and fully.”

“Damn. You real good at that. Almost makes me wanna kiss you.”

Her words made you scoff, as they were intended to, and she laughed. “Almost?”

“Kinda scared to do anything now after your crazy ass siblings just jumped me.”

Your own laugh bellowed out, causing her to dip her head into the crook of your neck. “If I am remembering correctly, they cornered us both.”

“And who got threatened with an ‘otherworldly’ virus? Me or you? You ain't tell me Shuri was kinda…”

“What? Insane? I'm sure I've mentioned this over my many rants about her aforementioned insanity.”

She glared at you, and you smirked. “Seeing it for myself was different. I ain't believe you for real.”

“That's truly something, I'm glad we are in agreement, but can you please kiss me now? Or do you want me to tell them you've been denying me, and you’ve hurt me?”

Riri grabbed your cheeks and scrunched her nose. So, so cute. “Shut up.” Her lips were on yours moments after, and her tongue was in your mouth. The kiss was rough, it was passionate, and it warmed your insides better than your long-forgotten tea ever could on this chilly night.

A clap of thunder gave you déjà vu and you two pulled away. The stars competed with the shine in her eyes, losing terribly. You were bathing in rain soon after as she pulled you in again.

When the showers became too much, you carried her inside, tossing her damp body onto your bed before getting on top of her and connecting your foreheads.

She giggled as she held your wet face in place. “Convenient how it always rains when we on that balcony of yours.”

“Perhaps it is all my doing. To get you out of your clothing of course.”

She leaned up to whisper in your ear. “You don't need rain for that baby.”

“Ndikuthanda kakhulu, Riri Williams.”

And she grinned, wider than ever, basking in the tangible feeling of said love. “Right back at ya.”

#riri williams x black!fem!reader #riri williams x fem!reader #lyricswriting #riri williams x black!reader #myworks #riri x black!reader #ironheart x black!reader #ironheart x reader #riri williams x reader #riri williams fanfic #dominique thorne #black panther #wakanda forever #ironheart #riri williams #riri williams x y/n #riri x reader #riri black panther

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poppy-metal · 2 years

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i fully believe steve prefers hitting it from the back idc idc idc. i want to fuck him so bad i'm going to have a meltdown fuck omg

He looks so pretty when he's miserable.

warnings: asshole!steve, reader is okay with it though. brief hints of nancy/reader. an even briefer hint of poly nancy/reader/steve at the end bc i have no control of my clit. hopeful ending. smut.

a/n: literally just wanted to write angry steve hitting it from the back but backstory snuck in and now im thinking about this dynamic. help.

ike....post breakup with nancy. you're buzzing when you hear he's at the party you're at. as the rumor mill goes, he hasn't been the partying type since wheeler broke his heart. at a party, you hear. so knowing he is hear has your heart beating fast.

you've always had a thing for him. ever since your freshman year really, when you'd been that annoying person who showed up to school with too many supplies. colored pens and highlighers neatly lined in front of you, pink notebook and fuzzy pink pencil posied and ready to take notes. it was embarrassing really. you felt a little silly when you saw how everyone else wasn't nearly as eager as you were.

but then steve had come into the room, laughing with his friends. that good smelling cologne filling the space around you as he passed. he'd stopped for a moment, glancing down at your colorful assortment and you'd felt so humiliated, sure he was about to say something sarcastic. but he'd merely curled his lips in a half kind of smile and rapped his knuckes on your desk, "look at you all prepared. putting us all to shame already, eh?"

maybe it HAD been sarcastic. you didn't care. either way, you'd been obsessed with him ever since.

but he'd gone and fallen in love with nancy wheeler. you couldn't blame him. or her. she was very pretty, you'd caught yourself sneaking glances in the lockerooms when you'd been changing for gym. had nearly had a heart attack when she'd smiled at you one day and said she liked your bra, thought it was cute.

so you hadn't been bitter. just disappointed. they were a hot couple. you'd moved on anyway, dated throughout high-school, done your thing.

it was the end of senior year though. and you and steve were at the same party. and he was single. ready to mingle? you'd find out.

finding him wasn't easy. you felt like a bit of a stalker, you had to admit, scouring the crowded rooms, peeking in rooms. you guessed just because he decided to come, didn't mean he was in a party mood.

you did find him though. at the last room at the end of the hall. the master bedroom, you had to guess. he was sagged in chair in the corner of said room, nursing a half empty bottle of beer, gripped loosely in his fingers. he looked beautiful. and a little pathetic. mostly beautiful, though.

he wore sunglasses, tipped precariously on the edge of his nose. he was wearing black, all black, which even you knew was strange. his hair wasn't styled. hanging into his forehead in a messy heap. his cheeks were flushed pink. he had to be tipsy.

you stepped gently into the room, "who's funeral?" you said idly, trying to keep your voice cool. like you'd just accidentally stepped in and hadn't been searching like a stalker.

steve peered at you from the bridge of his sunglasses, squinting like he was trying to place you, and then relaxing when he stopped trying to figure out who you were. "mine." he replied simply, swinging the bottle back to take a large sip. you watched his adams apple bob.

"oh, well. my condolences to your family." you try to joke, "i heard steve was an upstanding young man. he will be missed."

he looked at you then. really looked at you. in a way that made your skin heat, before he was looking away again. propping his chin on his hand and staring off somewhere. "will he?" he sounded wistful. you had a feeling he meant nancy. you winced.

"i think she was dumb, you know." you blurt without thinking. steves eyes snap to yours though, so you can't fold the words up and swallow them. you have to push forward. "b-by breaking up with you, i mean. i would never-"

you stop there, realizing you were about to lay out your minor obsession just like that. you feel his eyes on you, heavy and intense, but you're looking at the floor now. you hear the sound of him setting his bottle down.

"close the door." his voice sounds a bit clearer now. you look up at him, startled. the glint of his sunglasses meet you. you gulp, and hesitantly close the door.

"lock it."

you do that to. you're like a puppet, you think. a quiet marionette. the click of the lock sounds thunderous in the now quiet room. the thump of the party downstairs sounds distant, like a different universe from the one you're in right now.

steve stands up. you assumed he was at least a little tipsy, but he walks fine. walks you all the way back until your hip touches the dresser behind you. your own wide eyed reflection meets you in his glasses. you feel trapped. you don't want to break free.

he tilts his head, a lock of golden hair falling. your hands twitch to feel it. you know his hairs got to feel so soft. absurdly so.

"you'd never." he parrots back to you. "you'd never.....what? break up with me in a bathroom? lie about loving me? ditch me for some freak with bad hair?"

you blink. there's alot to unpack there. your fingers dig into the wood behind you. "u-um. well, y-yes." you look down again, "I'd never break up with you....if i had you."

"you're that girl from chemistry." he says suddenly, like hes just now remembering. you feel your skin light up with his recognition. "i remember now."

you start to smile-

"could always feel you staring at me. like, you never stopped. it was kinda creepy."

your smile falls.

"you've waited a long time for this, then, huh?" his voice sounds distant. casual. "for us to break up. wanted to swoop in and, what? comfort me? make me feel better? remind me why im the king of fucking hawkins?"

he sounds like he's making fun of himself. bitter. you realize this isn't about you, you're just a vessel. you could turn and walk away. he doesn't want you. not in the way you want him to. but- he sounds so sad, too. and maybe you were creepy, and weird, and a stalker. but.

"if that's what you want." you tell him, blinking up at him, resolved in your decision. "you've always been a king to me. even what you and nancy split. you're the coolest guy I know."

you hear his sharp inhale of breath. see his pink lips part. he closes them. jerks his head, "turn around. bend over." when you pause he raises an eyebrow, "you wanna help me right? this is what i need. i need to fuck." he touches your waist, where your skirt meets your top. "Is that good with you?"

you spin around without another second delay, bending at the waist over the hard wood of the dresser. the way he said fuck is running through your head, making you dizzy. steve harrington wants to fuck you. jesus.

you feel your skirt being hiked up, and your toes curl in your flats, cunt already wet and slick. ever since you saw him sitting there with a bottle in hand.

you feel his finger on the outline of your panties, push yourself up on your toes to grind back.

you hear his husky chuckle, and then his sunglasses are being thrown haphazardly on the dresser next to you. you hear him unluckle his jeans, unzip.

"I should have never dated nancy." he says, to himself. you whine as you feel the pressure of his blunt tip at your folds, he's holding your panties to the side, not even bothering to yank them down your thighs. "when wet willing pussy like this was around-" his chest presses against your arched spine, his head catches against your slick hole. pushes in. he grunts and you whimper. "could've. fuuuuck that's it- could've been fucking girls like you in the back of my car every weekend. instead of. buying. fucking. flowers. shit- goddamn."

he punctuates each word with a hard thrust, slamming your hips into the hard wood. the slap, slap, slap of him fucking you fills the room. makes you drool. hes using you, using you to feel better about himself. about the pain she caused. and you're fine with it, thrust back into him when he growls "that's right. back that ass up on my dick.", squeeze around him just to hear his breath hitch. you'd have gladly been a wet willing pussy for him to fuck into whenever he wanted. you don't care. this feels amazing.

"fuck, you're so good." his praise makes you dizzy, drip around him and the slick sounds your pussy is making around his cock are downright lewd. "such a good pussy. god, i missed this."

"you can have it," you whine, humping back into him, "whenever you want."

"yeah?" he sounds breathless. close. "gonna give me your number after this and let me cash in on this hot little piece of pussy whenever i want, huh? gonna pick up and drop everything the moment i call, right? spread those pretty legs without me even having to ask?"

you nod desperately, feeling yourself start to peak, bite down on your hand because you'll scream if you dont. he fucks so good. he hits so deep. hes so fucking big.

"good girl." he groans, gripping your hips and pulling you back to meet his pounding. "gonna cum in you. you're gonna let me."

you're so glad you're on birth control. you'd let him anyway, even if you weren't. "uh huh." you babble dumbly, "want it. cum in me."

he fucks you hard, before stilling, slamming into you to the hilt and pressing you down with his hand at the back of your head into the wood underneath you. you feel the warm splash of cum inside you, the grinding of his pelvis against your clit making your own orgasm gush around him. you feel limp and exhausted afterwards, panting heavily.

steve is quiet as he pulls out of you. you're both quiet as you right your clothing. he picks up his sunglasses and runs a hand through his hair, not meeting your gaze.

"do you." you lick your lips. "do you. uh. want my number?"

he puts the glasses on. shield his emotions from you, just like that. he nods once, jerkily. "sure. why not?"

____

steve doesn't call you after that. and two years later, when hawkins is overrun by monsters you never thought could be real, he saves you. you'd thought you'd never see him again. but there he is, but he's not alone.

nancy is with him. at his side. they're holding hands. in a way only lovers do. in the way you saw them do in the hallways your sophomore and junior year.

you almost wish he would have let you die. remembering that night, two years ago. him inside you. him using you. you letting him. of course, you'd only been an outlet. duh.

you let him convince you to stay with them though, guessing the protection couldn't be the worst thing.

you don't see the way he looks at you. don't see the guilt in his eyes, the shame. he wasn't himself that night, and you didn't even know it. he'd wanted to call. but then everything had happened. and he got nancy back. that's all that should matter. right?

he doesn't know why he can't stop watching you then. why he can't stop wanting to apologize and swear to you that the him you saw wasn't the him he actually was.

but he can't. when he looks at nancy, he's a little suprised to see her staring after yout too, pretty lips parted. like she's remembering something.

when she catches steve looking she blushes and looks away.

huh.

#ask #steve harrington smut #steve harrington x reader #stranger things x reader #steve harrington x you

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angelsandarsenic · 1 month

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ya'll wanna read the Deathduo drabble I wrote for a school assignment?

Of course you do, here you go.

"Do I believe in vampires," Phil repeated skeptically. Charlie had a strangely nervous look to him, and Phil raised an eyebrow. If anyone would believe this shit, it would be Charlie, but it was also equally likely that he was pulling Phil's leg.

"You would have proof, wouldn't you?" He put on a smile that made Phil sure he was joking. "Come on, you ever see any empty refrigerator cases when you knew for sure there was someone in there before?"

Phil frowned. He had been just about to open one of said compartments to inspect a new body and frankly wasn't in the mood for this. The report he had on this John Doe was severely lacking. That wasn't abnormal considering that as the coroner, he was always one of the first people to use it; not even abnormal in the fact that it didn't list a name, but there were usually some details by the time it got to him. Primary concerns, state of the body when found, state of the scene and whether or not it was suspected of foul play--all of it was listed as "inconclusive". Meaning Phil had a lot of work to do. Quesadilla Island was small, so his duties as a coroner were combined with being the medical examiner, and frequently had to do a lot of his own investigating. That didn't yet include his...unofficial duties.

Did Phil believe in vampires?

"No Charlie, that's never happened. And no, I don't believe in vampires." There were many beings beyond mortal nature, beings in fact, that he often dealt with, but vampires were not one of them. "Why, do you think you've met one?" It would probably eat him if he had, but then again, Charlie, as unassuming as he was, was one of the only people who knew of Phil's supernatural expertise for a reason.

He opened his mouth as if to respond, then closed it, glancing around. "No. No, probably not. Of course not, I was just joking. You're no fun Phil." He rolled his eyes, grinning again like usual and slapped the blonde man on the back. The change in demeanor was obvious, sure, but since his daughter died Charlie had had moments like that often. This wasn't his first rambling about the undead either, though it was mostly wistful dreaming about ghosts and angels (dreadful creatures, though Charlie didn't know that). He had never asked questions like this before.

"Yep, I'm sure." It had become his default response to that statement after so often of hearing it from his kids. "Are you here to help me out, or just interrogate me about the supernatural?"

"No, no, I uh, I actually have to be getting home. And groceries, I really need groceries. I'll see you later Phil!" He seemed slightly preoccupied, even as he cheerfully waved the man goodbye, but Philza had work to do, so he got on with it.

A gentle puff of cold air brushed against his face when he opened the airtight metal door. The cabinets for unidentified bodies and/or potential victims of foul play were kept at about negative ten degrees, to almost completely stop the process of decomposition. Without his gloves, the chilled metal would have stuck to his skin when he pulled out the gurney tray and transferred the body to the examination table. Typically, he preferred to start his examinations as soon as possible when receiving a new body, but this one had been brought in at the end of an already late shift and Phil was desperately wanting his bed and some dinner, so he had stuck it in the freezer for the night.

The man was long- tall, his feet and head both nearly hung off the edge of the table. His hair was dark and looked silky smooth, like the feathers of a raven, though Phil wasn't in the habit of petting the hair of corpses. His eyes were closed. That wasn't entirely unusual, except in this case the man seemed peaceful and completely relaxed, as though he had simply fallen asleep or been knocked unconscious. He was not. Even before the freezer, his skin had been completely cold and was extremely pale, no lingering blush on his cheeks. He had been dead for at least the whole day. There was not a single mark on him. No bruises, scratches or blemishes, no punctures or stab wounds or ligature marks. The coroner couldn't accurately pinpoint the man's age, however, he was clearly too young to have died from seniority or heart problems.

It was going to be a real hassle if Phil had to ask around about this man. His possessions, which still sat in a plastic bag on Phil's desk, hadn't included a wallet, driver's license, or anything of such consequence. Not even a phone. Quesadilla Island wasn't a large area--hence the name. A small community in the middle of nowhere, only one road leading in and out and no other towns for miles, discounting the ghost town locally known as Purgatory for lack of any better knowledge. Phil had no idea where this man came from, how long he had been here or where he was going. If he had died from some rapidly onset disease, it might take ages to find out otherwise.

Phil picked a small light out of his coat pocket and leaned over. With one latex gloved hand, he delicately peeled open the man's left eye. The ceiling lights flickered. Phil froze, straightening.

The lights glowed steadily, as if it never happened. Phil looked around, but finding nothing save for the sterile, empty white room he was used too, the same smell of sterile chemicals and glistening stainless steel, he turned back to the corpse. Phil leaned over the body once more, delicately opening the eye and turning on his hand held light.

He almost startled when the pupil looking back at him was pure, citrine yellow. Phil's own eyes widened. Contacts. Surely they were contacts. As annoying and admittedly gross as it was to have to pick contacts out of a dead person's eyes, Phil would much prefer that to the possibility of...

He checked the other eye, only managing to confirm that it was indeed also yellow, and in fact, not a contact lens, when the lights flickered and buzzed, like they were about to go out.

Philza shot up and immediately his left hand was in his pocket, clutching the protection charm he always kept with him at the morgue. The lights continued to short out, on and off, on and off. This time, Phil's stare was glued to the man--the creature--on the table. In his experience, anything that looked human was malicious. Anything that looked so convincingly human could only be very, very dangerous. He backed out of arm's reach.

Somehow, whenever the lights went dark, the figure still remained perfectly clear. Something flickered stark white over its face, and something else was burning darker and darker into its chest, right along its collarbones. It glowed faintly at the edges, like a brand being burned into the creature. Wings? Over its face, Phil was starting to make out the silhouette of a skull, as if in grease paint.

Phil's heart thumped loudly in his ears. That...that was not good. He didn't know what it was, but it wasn't good.

At some point, the intensity of the lights had become glaring when they were on. The electrical buzzing crescendoed, until Phil had to close his eyes and cover his ears, for fear of what all this flashing might do to his sight. Even under his hands, he heard the loud shatter and pop of the lights blowing out above him, felt a few shards of glass plunk against his lab coat before hitting the floor. Everything went silent.

Phil didn't dare move. If there was any chance of catching that thing's attention, he didn't want it. However, slowly, he opened his eyes.

In the pitch dark, the white skull defined the creature's face. There was no more burning edge to the wing brand across his chest, but faintly, as if through translucent skin, Phil could see the dim ivory of bones. The creature's whole skeleton.

The thing on the exam table still looked very much human, insides included, but he was still having considerable trouble making anything out for certain without the lights.

When those lurid, golden eyes snapped open, Phil was sure that the thing would have no trouble seeing him. He expected it to stand, to float, to move with some inherently inhuman, Wrong motion that would set every alarm bell off in his head. He expected it to be silent, eerily turning to look at him, or perhaps ignoring him completely in favor of the door. Worse, maybe to go for the other corpses, in which case, Phil had to decide how he was going to explain the mutilation or disappearance of three whole bodies to his boss because he certainly wasn't going to risk his life for them. He hadn't the slightest idea how to deal with this thing to begin with! The closest he could come, as on the nose as it was, was that this was some avatar of Death. The obsidian black wings were Her symbol and the skull on the creature's face and bones glowing faintly through its skin weren't exactly subtle.

It came to him then. A main character in every folktale but only vague approximations in the thick tomes in his library. A creature none had seen and lived, or perhaps a creature to be gambled with. The unkillable but too often cheated. A creature no one was ever truly prepared for, lacking so much proper documentation that Phil was stunned to be seeing it now, in such a plain form. A Grim Reaper.

Is it here for me? He wasn't that old!

That conclusion didn't sit right though. It didn't feel like his time yet. Not in the petulant, fearful way he was sure the Reaper encountered often, but a surety deep in his soul. It wasn't Philza's time.

But Philza was not prepared for this.

The Reaper groaned. It brought a hand to its eyes and rubbed, the same way Phil had watched Chayanne do in the mornings. It rolled over on the table like it was going to shut off an alarm and go back to sleep for just five more minutes. The table wasn't meant for that. He rolled right off with a mighty thud!

That shook Phil out of his stupor. He almost laughed, listening to the creature curse, but he wasn't calm enough for that yet. Still, he grabbed a bigger flashlight off the desk and turned it on, shining it on where the Reaper lay in a naked heap on the floor. It jumped when the beam fell on it, as if it hadn't realized he was there.

"Um...hullo? Are you alright mate?" With nothing else to say and too much dignity to scream and run, his brain defaulted to British over-politeness.

The Reaper swallowed, and cursed again, this time in Spanish before replying, "Don't look!"

Immediately, Phil turned the beam away, shining it pointlessly on the tiled floor. There were a few seconds of silence, before the Reaper spoke up again. It sounded very human. "Where am I? You uh, don't have my clothes, do you?"

"I do!" Only a second after realizing that he ought to have been getting the man his things, he also realized how creepy that must have sounded. "Here. Uh, sorry, you're at the morgue. Some police officers picked you up thinking you were dead, so..." he trailed off. The larger plastic bag had held entirely normal civilian attire, so Phil hadn't found it strange at first. Now, he was genuinely surprised it wasn't a long black cloak. He slid the bag across the floor and the Reaper tore into it eagerly.

There was a lot of shuffling before the Reaper muttered, and Phil could see the white glow of his face paint raise in the air as he muttered, "bien, bien."

Hesitantly, Phil called out, "all good?"

"Yes, yes, thank you."

"Right." He didn't bother pointing the light back at the Reaper. "I'll just go turn on the backup generators then."

"Ah, mierda. Did I do that? I'm sorry."

Taken aback, the human's plan to leave and hopefully not return until the entity had left was derailed. "What happened to you?" he asked.

When the beam fell upon the Reaper, Phil realized it was in fact very tall. At least a whole head taller than he was. It didn't squint or flinch away at the harsh light, as if it made no difference to him. The Reaper now donned ripped black skinny jeans and a purple and teal hoodie. The white face markings disappeared under the light, but he could still see the tips of black wings peeking over the creature's collarbones. He had several black rings adorning long, nimble fingers and frankly looked as though he should be wearing barbed wire necklaces and thick eyeliner. Maybe he did when he wasn't laying "dead" on the side of the road.

No, that was silly. Phil was jumping to stereotypical conclusions. Don't be rude. Admittedly, the mental image made him smile slightly.

His expression was just as clueless as Phil felt. "I wish I knew."

”You’re supposed to be dead,” Phil informed him.

”I am,” the Reaper answered, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. “Or, well, I was. Sort of.”

Phil attempted to process that for a moment, to no avail. All supernatural nonsense aside, the dead were dead, this he knew as fact. ...Except apparently not anymore. “You didn’t have a pulse.”

”Oh no, I wouldn’t. I’m a Reaper, we don’t bleed. Or have heartbeats. I’m all skin and bones, really.” He chuckled quietly at his own joke.

Huh. So that confirmed Phil’s suspicion then. Why is he here?! “Do you have a name?” That was the polite question to ask first.

”Right! Yes, hi, I’m Missa. Sorry, I haven’t really talked to anyone in a long time. Not anyone who wasn’t about to die at least.” He held a hand out, which, out of the flashlight beam, turned back into pale bone under translucent skin. When the human hesitated, he seemed to sense the questions that died on Phil’s tongue, and his enthusiasm waned considerably, awkwardly drawing the limb back in to himself.

Phil crossed the room, reached out and took it anyway. When had any entity been so friendly? Much less one of this caliber? The answer was never, and it never hurt to be in such a creature’s good graces either. It occurred to him momentarily that physical contact with the Reaper might mean certain doom, but he was still wearing gloves, so he figured it was fine.

The way Missa lit up made him unable to resist the mirroring smile that split his own cheeks. “I’m Phil.”

”Nice to meet you Phil!” Hefting himself up on the autopsy table as casually as if it were his living room couch, he grinned delightedly. “I don’t suppose any other bodies have come alive- or uh, undead on you lately, have they?”

Oh boy, Phil was not getting paid enough for this.

-----------

So basically, something mysterious made Flippa Come Back Wrong and Reaper!Missa is here to investigate!

#deathduo #QSMP drabble #philza minecraft #missasinfonia #charlie slimecicle #qsmp juanaflippa

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cosmic-eye · 1 year

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Psychonauts the Musical Act I

because I'm more awake now. With some inspiration from @loudlychoppedbread's comments.

Opening song: "Welcome to Whispering Rock" --- A lighthearted and fun number --- Starts with the campers & counselors singing separately, then coming together when they reach the campfire. Basically an exposition song for what the camp is, with some minor plot info thrown in (one or two lines about the lake monster). Ends with Oleander getting cut off as Raz falls from a tree.

The I Want Song: "Raz, the Psychonaut" --- A more serious, wistful song, but still somewhat lighthearted --- After being permitted to stay for the night, Raz explains to Dogan how badly he wants to be a Psychonaut. The mood is lightened by Dogan's input (And then you'll make their heads explode?). Takes place on the steps of the boy's cabin & ends before they enter together. However, after getting into his bunk, Raz sings two or three more lines to himself.

Basic Braining: "Battlezone" --- A very generic boot camp song --- The campers start the song on their way to class, mentioning how scary the training is supposed to be (A kid got killed last year). Upon entering Oleander's mind, he takes over as lead singer, going on about his experiences in the war as he guides the campers through his obstacle course. The campers sing backup, but as they get kicked out of Oleander's mind, their voices diminish until they're gone completely and Raz has reached the end.

Camper's song, pt I: Currently, I have no good name --- Mostly lighthearted, but with some darker/sadder undertones when appropriate --- While searching for Sasha's secret lab, Raz runs into various campers. The different groups each get their own verse about their lives. Campers would be those found at the kid's cabin area, around the main lodge, and in the GPC & wilderness area.

Sasha's Shooting Gallary: "Sasha's Immaculate Mind" (that title is way too good I'll never come up with anything better so I'm just going to steal it) --- A simple, structured song that slowly grows more chaotic --- Sasha explains to Raz the importance of controlling one's emotions, pretending to lose control as Raz battles the censors. However, once the Mega Censor appears, his control is gone for real.

Lili's song: "Not Like the Old Days" --- A number that's constantly trying to be a downer, but Raz keeps changing it back to optimistic --- Right after leaving Sasha's lab to go see Milla, he bumps into Lili, and she goes on about how the world doesn't need the Psychonauts anymore, while Raz brings up exciting missions he's read about. Plays out almost like a battle/argument between the two (but a low-stakes one). Ends with Lili's "shut up and kiss me" bit.

Camper's song, pt II: Still no name for this --- Again, mostly lighthearted but with darker/sadder undertones when appropriate --- Raz encounters more campers on his way to the docks. This is a continuation of the previous camper's song, with some of the campers reappearing to give a brief update about themselves. Campers included are those found in GPC & wilderness and at the lake. Ends when Raz sees Dogan coming out of the water, brainless.

Milla's Dance Party: "Roll With It" --- A cheery, disco number with a brief serious bit in the middle --- Milla sings about levitation, with some backup from the campers and/or the party dancers. When Raz stumbles upon the nightmare room, Milla gets serious & explains a bit about the nightmares before encouraging him back to the party and resuming the song as normal.

Brain Tumblr Experiment/Loboto's song: "Why Are You Screaming?" --- Way too upbeat for the subject matter --- Loboto singing about dentistry & removing Dogan's brain while Raz watches on in horror. Ends with Dogan sneezing out his brain.

Lili & Raz song: "Psychic Emergency" --- A fast-paced song brimming with urgency and excitement --- Raz meets Lili by the docks and they compare notes. A bit of a reversal of "Not Like the Old Days," where Lili is enthusiastic and Raz is a little more serious than before. The song derails with Lili's "let's make out" line, and ends with her being abducted by Linda.

End of Act I. Act II here.

#the reason this came about was because i was wishing for some psychonauts villain songs #that's all #psychonauts #psychonauts the musical #any lyricists out there who want to write a few things? huh? huh?#edited this a bit to better fit with the other posts

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jerzwriter · 10 months

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All in the Past

AU Mini-Series Part 1 of 3

This started as a request from @angelasscribbles for ONE scene. Three parts later... I decided to make this a follow-up and alternate ending to one of my favorite short, angsty AUs, Unblemished, because we needed more angst. All three parts will be posted today.

Series Summary: Tobias & Casey were friends turned lovers whose different dreams led them to become friends once again. Two years after their painful breakup, Casey has moved on. Tobias is in town to attend his friend and one-time love's wedding, with his new girlfriend on his arm. It's just the wedding of an old friend, or, is it?

Part 1 Summary: Tobias and Meghan leave Boston to attend Casey's wedding in Raleigh, North Carolina. It's a little getaway, a happy trip to see his two friends get hitched. But prewedding events lead to unexpected and uninvited emotions coming to the surface. Tobias gets a cold shoulder from Sienna, and their frank conversation leaves more questions than answers.

Book: Open Heart (Post Series)

Characters/Pairings: Casey MacTavish (F!MC) x M!OC, Tobias Carrick x F!OC, Sienna Trinh

Rating: Teen

Words: 2,700

Series Masterlist

Tobias x Casey Masterlist | OH Masterlist | Full Masterlist

Ladies and gentlemen, we have touched down at Raleigh-Durham International Airport, where it is 80 degrees, and conditions are bright and sunny. We thank you for flying Transit Airlines and wish you the best with whatever brings you to the area.

"Sir?" A woman gently nudged Tobias's arm when he didn't reply. "Sir... I'm sorry, but I need to get...."

"Oh, of course," Tobias apologized, jumping from his seat to allow the woman through.

He was usually the first to get off a flight, but today, he found himself lost in his thoughts, and he still hadn't found his way back as he reached into the overhead compartment to grab his bag. All it took was an arm looping around his waist to snap him back into the present. The petite, red-haired beauty's smile lit up the cabin as she held him tight; she was as happy as he was pensive.

"I missed you," she beamed. "You were such a gentleman agreeing to give that mom your seat so she could sit with her child, but I have a warning for you."

"Oh yeah," he grinned. "What’s that?”

“If we’re ever on a flight longer than two hours, you’re prohibited from doing that. I need you near me... deal?”

“I’ll tell you what. If we’re ever on a flight longer than two hours, I’ll spring for first class, so it’s not an issue.”

“Hmmm, I could handle that,” Meghan smiled.

“Good,” he smiled, taking her hand. “Now, let’s get off this plane.”

~~~~~

He couldn’t describe his mood if he tried. Melancholy was too sad; wistful may be more fitting, though neither truly worked. He was happy, he reminded himself. More importantly, Casey was happy, too. It had been over two years since that cold Boston night when they tearfully said goodbye. Fast friends from the start, they eventually turned into much more. When different goals ended their dreams of “forever,” they were heartbroken and said goodbye, foolishly believing it was where their story ended. People don’t always see the invisible string that binds souls that are meant to be connected, and when Casey’s phone rang three months later, not answering was never a consideration. They started as friends, and perhaps that’s where they were meant to be. That’s what they were now. Friends. Good friends.

“Welcome to the Umstead Hotel,” an overexuberant young woman smiled. “What name is your reservation under?”

“Uh... Carrick. Dr. Tobias Carrick.”

“I have you right here! You’re in town for the MacTavish-Duncan wedding?”

“That’s right,” he nodded.

“Wonderful! The couple is hosting a cocktail reception for their out-of-town guests in the lounge at six.”

“That’s so sweet!” Meghan gushed, taking hold of Tobias’s arm. “We’re going, right?”

“Of course,” he smiled with some apprehension. “As long as I get in a nap... that early flight wiped me out more than I thought it would.”

“Fine, old man,” Meghan laughed as they entered the elevator, her head firmly on his shoulder.

He was just tired. He told himself. Besides, it was normal to feel emotional when a good friend was married. And Casey was among his best. It all made sense. Perfect sense.

~~~~~

The evening found him at the bar alone, anxiously twirling his old-fashioned in his hand. They had only been in their room fifteen minutes when Meghan realized she left her shoes in Boston. She was in an Uber on her way to the North Hills Mall in minutes, leaving Tobias to his nap. She promised she’d be back by six, but Tobias knew her well enough to know if shoe shopping was involved... he’d be lucky if she returned by ten.

He noticed a small group of wedding guests mingling toward the back of the lounge but didn’t recognize any faces. The normally social doctor wasn’t in the mood for small talk, so he stayed put. He didn’t want to come at all, but hurting Casey’s feelings wasn’t something he was willing to do. Now, it looked like she was a no-show for her own party, so he made a decision. He had already waited the requisite twenty minutes; he was finishing this drink and then making a beeline back to his room. But as he raised the glass to his lips, he heard her voice. It didn’t matter how much time had passed, he’d know it anywhere.

“Hello, stranger!”

They were just friends now, nothing more. So why did he feel his heart flutter? His signature smirk was firmly in place before turning to greet her. A natural defense mechanism to keep the butterflies at bay. But when his eyes fell upon her, all pretense disappeared.

How did she only become more beautiful? Etheral is how he’d describe her. Blonde hair pulled into a whispy updo, with delicate off-white flowers pinned to hold it in place. Her matching silk dress gracefully skimmed over every curve that he knew so well, and her smile. That smile had melted his heart and pulled him out of more bad days than he dared to count. And after all the years he’d known her, after all they had been through, it still rendered him speechless. Noticing his silence was lasting too long, he jumped from his bar stool to embrace her. A brilliant grin hid the war of emotions battling inside him.

“Stranger indeed! I haven’t heard from you in a while, kid. I was beginning to think you rescinded my invitation.”

“As if!” Casey laughed. “It hasn’t been that long. You try managing a busy career, a publishing deadline, and planning a wedding for two hundred of your nearest and dearest. See how much time you’d have to chat.”

“Casey... do you ever see me in that position?” He asked wryly.

He swore he saw her smile falter, and a bit of her effervescence was gone. But why would it be? She was happy. It must have been one old-fashioned too many.

“No,” she spoke softly. “I guess I don’t.”

“You look stunning,” he smiled. “How do you plan to outdo this on your big day?”

“Stop,” she said with a playful slap on his arm. “I’m immune to your flattery by now, don’t you know?”

They both laughed nervously as his eyes roamed the room. Still, no sight of Meghan, and someone else was missing, too.

“Where’s Craig? I haven’t heard from him either. I was going to see if we could shoot some hoops before the wedding.”

“He got called into an emergency surgery,” she shrugged. “The glamourous life of doctors. And where is Mandy? You said you were bringing a plus one. I assumed she’d be joining you.”

“Mandy? It’s Meghan,” he chuckled. “Mandy and I broke up some time ago.”

“Oh, sorry. It’s hard to keep up with you. So, where is your latest and greatest?”

“She had to run to the mall for a few things. But she’ll be back soon.”

“Good,” Casey smiled politely. “I can’t wait to meet her. How long have you two...” She raised her hands, visibly checking herself. Her cheeks red with embarrassment. “I’m sorry, that’s none of my business...”

“It’s OK,” Tobias laughed, reassuringly touching her elbow, then dropping it when the gesture took both by surprise. “It’s not a state secret. Only a few months... don’t worry... we’re not headed down the alter anytime soon.”

Casey let out a wry laugh, and her words came out more curtly than intended. “I didn’t expect you would be.”

“Yeah,” Tobias muttered, gulping down the remains of his drink. “Walking down aisles isn’t exactly my thing. Is it?”

“Well, it was your excuse for ending things with me,” she replied with her arms crossed. “But you never know. Sometimes people change.”

Casey felt her stomach drop. What if he had changed? Accepting that Tobias was generally opposed to marriage was one thing, but if he ever took that step, she’d have to admit that marriage wasn’t the issue... she was, and that was too painful to imagine. She began to perspire, and was filled with worry. This wasn’t the reaction she should be having when her wedding was just over a day away. Her eyes darted around the room, desperate for a reason to escape.

“Well, I should mingle with the other guest,” she settled on. “Without Craig here, it’s double duty for me. But you and Meghan will be at brunch tomorrow morning, right?”

He hadn’t been aware there was a brunch. And since laying eyes on Casey, attending more wedding events was the last thing he wanted to do, but he detected the hint of pleading in her voice.

“Do you want me there?” he asked softly.

Casey nodded effusively. “I do.”

“Then I’ll be there,” he assured. “We both will.”

~~~~~

Brunch was... awkward. Tobias was sure Casey thought seating them together was a good idea, but she probably didn’t know how long Sienna Trinh could hold a grudge. And with Sienna’s plus one coming down with the flu, Tobias, Meghan, and Sienna made for an awkward trio.

Casey viewed their breakup as mutual, but Siennna saw things differently. Tobias was a stupid man who let his commitment issues ruin a wonderful thing, leaving her friend heartbroken. He hoped more than two years passing and Casey marrying someone else would have changed Sienna’s opinion of him, but all indications said otherwise. Sienna picked at her stack of blueberry pancakes as they all struggled to make small talk. Perhaps they could talk shop?

“So, Meghan, you’re at Edenbrook, too? What department do you work in?”

“I’m a paralegal. I work with the CEO.”

“Oh,” Sienna smiled politely, that didn’t work. After more uncomfortable silence, Meghan made the next attempt.

“I’m really looking forward to the wedding. The venue they selected is just beautiful! I’ve seen it on some wedding shows but never thought I’d get to attend a wedding there.”

Sienna held back a laugh. “I can understand that. I mean... because we live in Boston, and you know... you’re with Tobias.”

Losing patience, Tobias tossed his linen napkin on the table. “And what’s that supposed to mean, Si?”

“Just that you avoid weddings like the plague. I was shocked to hear you were coming.”

“It’s Casey’s wedding,” he smiled tersely. “Do you think I’d miss it?”

“I guess the answer’s no,” Sienna smiled smugly.

“You know, I’m going to run to the ladies' room,” Meghan announced.

Sienna wiped her lip, “I’ll join you.”

“No,” Meghan insisted. “I need a moment away from this cold war, and if you both care about Casey as much as you profess to, maybe you should work out whatever... this... is before her wedding day. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

Tobias and Sienna sat slack-jawed momentarily, then a slight smile formed on his lips.

“I guess I deserved that,” Sienna stated. “Meghan seems lovely, and no matter my feelings toward you, I shouldn’t have made her uncomfortable. I owe her an apology.”

“Maybe what we owe her is doing what she asked us to do,” he replied. “Sienna... what exactly is your problem with me? I know people can be bitter about their best friend’s exes, but Casey and I are good friends. If we put the past in the past, why can’t you?”

Sienna shut her eyes, warring over how much she should or should not say.

“It’s different,” she started cautiously. “I got to see the extent of the damage after the two of you fell apart. Whose apartment do you think she ended up at that last night in Boston? Who do you think she sat on the phone listening to her cry all night after she moved? I know you were hurting after things ended, but I experienced her pain. You were spared that.”

“Sienna, breakups are painful. You know that! And no, I didn’t see her immediate aftermath because we felt not contacting each other for a while would be for the best. But I was living through my own personal hell. It was hard on both of us.”

“Then why’d you do it? Tobias? All she wanted was a future with you... You’re the one who said it wasn’t possible!”

“We wanted different futures. Hers included a wedding... just like this one... a house in the suburbs, two kids, and a dog. I never wanted that and didn’t want to promise her something I couldn’t guarantee. Don’t you think I had wished I could? I could put you on the phone with my best friend. Kerry would tell you how wrong it was for Casey to want that life more than she wanted me... but you’re both wrong. We made a choice together, and it was painful as fuck. But, Si, it wasn’t my fault.”

“I guess,” Sienna sighed. “It’s just hard to see you both throw something so special, so rare away. It’s two years later and still hard to see.”

“I understand, but... Casey was dating Craig six months later, and she’s marrying him tomorrow. She and I are friends, hell, Craig and I are friends... so why are we even discussing this?”

“Because I’m her best friend... and I know how someone should be acting before they get married... and I still don’t see that in Casey.”

“What... what are you talking about....”

“She’s happy, sure... to a degree... but I’ve seen her when she was truly happy, and this seems like a facsimile.”

“Sienna,” he stalled, “She’s busy planning this weekend and under a lot of stress, but I’ve been around them. She loves Craig.”

“I know she does,” Sienna replied. “But she was in love with you.”

Tobias sat in stunned silence when he noticed Craig mingling with guests across the way. Looking for any excuse to evade the topic, he spat, “There’s Craig, uh... I’ve been looking for him... wanted to see him before the wedding, but he seems a little evasive...”

“Of course he has. Don’t you realize? Tobias, you’re the one who got away. You’re her best friend... other than me... that is. Do you think he needs a reminder before he says his I dos?”

“I... I thought coming here was the right thing to do... I just wanted to... to be here for them... and to see...”

“To see what?”

“To see she really moved on. To really... let her go.”

“Right,” Sienna smiled. “But you’re over her. I’m glad we talked, T. I think my bitterness toward you is just my overprotectiveness of Casey. I love her. But I can be a bit of a momma bear.”

“No shit!” he said with a half-smile as Sienna narrowed her eyes at him.

“I’m trying to make amends. Shut up before I change my mind. Truce?”

“Of course. How could I be mad at you for being protective of Casey.”

“I know,” Sienna smiled, pushing away from the table. “Do me a favor. Just lay low until the wedding. Be there to support her, then go live your life and let Casey move on with hers. We have to trust that she made this decision knowing what’s right for her, and... we should both respect that.”

“I never intended to do anything but.”

“Good.” Sienna looked up and saw Meghan approaching the table. “I owe you an apology and want to thank you. This talk was overdue, and I promise. We’ll be grown-ups from now on.”

“Hey, I was being a grown-up,” Tobias protested.

“Tobias, is this the hill you want to die on?” Sienna snapped back.

“Continue...” he grinned.

Sienna extended her hand. “It was very nice meeting you.”

“It’s lovely meeting you, too,” Meghan agreed. “Maybe we can get coffee back in Boston?”

“Sure, I’d like that. Tobias, I like her... be good to her.”

Tobias slipped his hand into Meghans and smiled. “That’s my intention. Thanks, Sienna.”

After Sienna walked away, Tobias turned to Meghan and thanked her for forcing them to talk. “You’re pretty special, you know. that?”

“I do,” she smiled sweetly. “But let's go back to our room because now it’s our turn to talk.”

"About?"

"About why we're at this wedding..."

"Meg," Tobias sighed. "We're here to see my friend... my friends... get married. Nothing more."

"Good, then it won't be an issue to have a quick talk about it...right?"

He let out a soft sigh. It was the last thing he wanted, but he knew better than to think Meghan would let it go.

"Right," he stood up, extending his hand to her. "Lead the way."

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics @choicesjuly2023challenge - Fairytale

#choices fanfic #open heart #open heart fanfic #choices open heart #open heart choices #tobias carrick #tobias carrick x f!mc (past)#tobias carrick x f!oc #oh!f!mc x m!oc #sienna trinh #playchoices fanfic #choices the stories you play #playchoices

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familyvideostevie · 2 years

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your steve could never get stale i love him <3

buuut i love the idea of a mutual pining with eddie and they smoke together and finally admit their feelings cause they're high and giggly 🥹🥹

you are so kind my love, thank you!! i think i made this so sweet i gave myself a sugar high. hope you like it! <3 | 1k, fluff, fem!reader, smoking together

Eddie looks disastrously good from this angle. Your head is in his lap and you watch him take the final puff of the joint you've been sharing. He stubs it out and leans back on his headboard, blowing a smoke ring that makes you giggle.

"Something funny?" he asks. The hand not on your hip tangles in your hair, his blunt nails scratching your scalp divinely.

"You know so many smoke tricks and I still can't do a single one." He looks down at you, brown eyes light with mirth.

"I've had lots of practice, sweetheart." Your chest constricts at the pet name. Pretty words and affection are common enough from Eddie, especially for you. Every term he uses is laced with affection that's both sweetness and poison because you want them to mean more. You want it to be real.

"Yeah, well." You close your eyes and relax further into his palms. Sometimes, when you're high, you cry more easily, and you don't want that to happen tonight. You don't want to ruin this. So you laugh instead.

"Yeah, well, giggly girl," he mocks, not unkindly. Never unkindly, not from Eddie.

"Are you excited for graduation?" you ask him. "Two more weeks." His hand pauses in your hair before you feel his fingers trace your hairline, smoothing out your eyebrows.

"I'm ready," he replies. He sounds wistful and you wonder if he's smiling. Even behind your lids you can picture it clearly: how his cheeks are taken over by the expression, his eyes warm and pleased. Eddie is magical all the time, but when he smiles you think he could bring about world peace.

"You gonna miss it?" His fingertips move from your brows to trace your nose from the bridge to the tip, over and over. "Eddie, that's gonna make me fall asleep."

"You like it?" He's taken on a tone you don't know as well -- shy, almost nervous.

"I always like when you touch me, Eddie," you mutter. The honesty comes unbidden but you don't backtrack. "Now answer my question, silly."

"Not gonna miss it." He takes a breath so deep you shift in his lap a little. "Gonna miss you, though." His fingers move yet again, this time to the indent above your lip. He presses his thumb there and your eyes flutter, but you keep them closed, a little terrified of what he'd see in them if he looked.

"I'm not going anywhere. What are you talking about?" Your lips brush his skin with every word. He laughs and it makes you want to echo the sound.

"Too true, sweet thing. Just gonna miss you bullying me to do my homework." That gets a real laugh out of you. You've spent hours sitting with Eddie as he does math, science, english, and everything else needed to get him on that stage with his diploma in hand. It's been a glorious year of time with him.

"I'll find something new to bully you about, don't worry." You want to spend as much time with Eddie as possible. As long as he'll let you.

"I don't doubt it, sweet girl." He finally moves his hand from your mouth, swiping it over your lower lip before tapping your chin just once. You miss the touch immediately. Eddie is quiet for a moment so you open your eyes again. He's already looking at you, brow furrowed and chewing on his lower lip. You reach up to smooth the crease and he leans into it before snatching your hand away.

"If this doesn't land I'm gonna need you to forget it, okay?" he says, suddenly serious.

"Eddie?" You don't know how he manages so many moods while high. You can barely keep a handle on yours. He takes a deep breath and makes sure he's looking right at you. His thumb swipes across your knuckles.

"See, the thing is I'm in love with you, baby. And I just have to tell you."

You're high, but not high enough to feel like you're dreaming. To feel like maybe this isn't real. In fact, you feel everything very keenly -- the clamminess of your hands, the warmth of Eddie's gaze as you sit up, turning to face him. How a loose string from the shirt of his you're wearing tickles your collarbone. Every cell in your body is a live wire.

"You're not just saying that, right?" You can't keep a pleading tone out of your voice. Please let it be true, you think. Please.

"I'd never," he says immediately, reaching for you. His palms are warm on your already hot cheeks. "I'd never just say that."

"Eddie," you murmur. "Eddie, I --" He swipes his thumbs across your cheekbones reverently.

"It's okay, though. If that's not how you feel. I'll still be your friend forever, if you let me and --"

"I do, though," you gasp out. "I do, Eddie. I do love you. I'm in love with you." The breath whooshes out of him all at once and he makes a sound that has you lunging for him, arms wrapping around his neck. Your blood is singing, pounding in your ears. You say it over and over, whispering it into his hair like a prayer. I love you, Eddie. I love you. I love you.

"My sweet girl," he whispers. "C'mere." You pull away from him and he leans back in immediately, his nose brushing yours. His breath is hot on your lips and you keep your eyes open as long as you can before they flutter closed as Eddie brings his mouth to yours. Gently, reverently, with all the tenderness in the world, he kisses you for the first time. Your high from the joint is fading but you feel otherworldly in Eddie's arms, this boy who loves you, as you kiss him again and again and again, giggling all the while.

tags: @ruinedbythehobbit @superflannel @eddiussy @greenclues @sunlitide @gloryofroses19 @carpediem1219 @themarvelousbee @sunshinehollandd @katsukis1wife @imherefortea @spideyboipete @lonelywidow @louderfortheback @actual-mom-steve-harrington

want to be added to my tag list? send me a message and specify for steve, eddie, or both!

reblog, send feedback, requests open, masterlist here!

#emma's asks #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson #stranger things fic #stranger things x reader #stranger things imagine #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things x y/n

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liquidstar · 2 months

Text

If I can't sleep that's ok because you know what.... I will post one more small excerpt from my oc writing practice wips. Just once more for now

probably the only context you need for this one is that everyone's at a party that a place is throwing them for completing a big mission. so here it is

-----

As the party raged on within the stone walls, Polaris slipped away to the porch. She took slow steps, carefully carrying an arranged plate of finger food she’d collected. She sat down on the floor, and leaned her head up against the wall. Taking in the muted sounds of the festivity indoors, she found comfort in this space that hovered between the roaring celebration and the stillness of the night.

Polaris wasn’t alone in seeking refuge outside, another person had found their way to her hiding spot- It’s Mira! Though Polaris had ventured out to eat alone, Mira was certainly not unwelcome company.

However, Mira did not seem to notice Polaris sitting on the ground. She walked right past her, lost in her own thoughts as she made her way to the railing, relaxing her arms on it.

“Hey,” Polaris spoke in a cautious voice, so as not to startle her teammate. Still, she saw Mira tense at the sound of her voice.

“Oh! Polly! I didn't see you, sorry!”

Polaris laughs, “All good!”

“What are you doing… sitting on the ground alone?”

“Eating,” Polaris shrugged, and took another bite of her food.

“Ohh…”

“What about you? I didn't think you'd be the type to leave parties. Aren’t you a social butterfly?”

“I'd like to be a butterfly!” Mira laughs, turning her face towards the sky above, her eyes sparkling with wonder, “But actually I just wanted to look at the stars a little. They're clearer here in the mountains y'know…”

“Hm,” Polaris followed Mira's gaze upwards. She rose to her feet, joining Mira at the railing, “Yeah, you're right.”

“It's so pretty,” Mira marveled, tracing the constellations above. She adds, “It's so big.”

“Yeah, well, that's space.”

They fell into a comfortable stilless, taking in the enchanting view of the starry sky. The distant sounds of the party still echoed in the background, the golden light from inside illuminating only their backs.

“Do you ever feel like this is the wrong place?”

Polaris tilted her head and raised an eyebrow at Mira's sudden question. “What do you mean?”

Mira raised a single outstretched hand to the heavens, as if waiting for the universe to take it. Staring at the gaps of sky between her fingers, she continues, "Don't you feel like… We're supposed to be up there?"

Polaris looks into Mira's eyes, which were still fixated above. She could only see a vague wistfulness within them- A nostalgia. The stars themselves shined within those eyes. Polaris couldn’t explain why, but this made her uneasy.

As if in a daze, Mira stood on her tiptoes and reached for the stars with all her might. In a panic, Polaris drops her plate and grabs onto her friend.

“Polaris? What are you doing?” Mira’s trance was broken by the sudden embrace, “I thought you weren't a hugger?” She joked.

“I thought… I thought the stars were going to take you away,” Polaris mumbled, embarrassed by the ridiculousness of her own words, “So I held on…”

Mira couldn’t help but laugh at this absurd statement, “What? That's silly! How would that even work?” poking fun at her friend's nonsense concerns, she tried to lighten the mood.

“I don't-” Polaris relaxed her grip, but didn't fully let go of Mira, “It really felt like it…”

Mira let out a sigh and patted her head, “I wouldn't let that happen, okay?”

Having these irrational concerns humored somehow made Polaris feel even more embarrassed. She released Mira from her embrace, and stepped back to lean on the railing. "Sorry,” she replied.

“Well, I'm just glad you care so much!” Mira laughed again, not letting up on her teasing. However, her snarky smile softens and she leaves Polaris with a, “Thank you.”

With that, Mira heads back inside, leaving Polaris alone with her thoughts. She took one last glance at the stars.

“The right place…” She whispers to the night.

#finn's ocs #now for girls #but actually there is ONE thing in this one that relates to the last one i posted #it's really small so I'll just point it out- saiph and mira both comfort people by patting their heads lol #also going back to the first one i posted- polaris gets to eat! yay!#ALSO w polaris i wanna have distinct moments where the description for her team each switch from teammate to friend. this is mira's #i also wanna work in distinct moments where the descriptions for characters will change from boy/girl to man/woman.#bc they're all like in their mid 20s by the end. and i wrote one for bella but it's not cleaned up #but yeah that's what i got and those are my thoughts

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purpleqilinwrites · 3 months

Text

these unfamiliar intimacies: chapter one.

a/n: i've had this fic on the brain for a while, so i'm super excited to have the first chapter out!

fandom: jujutsu kaisen

character: nanami kento

genre: eventual fluff (can read as either platonic or romantic at this point)

info: cyberpunk 2077 au; afab reader; reader is a ripperdoc; nanami is a merc

warnings: mentions of a suicide attempt (unsuccessful); mentions of injury

chapter synopsis: it's the first time gojou has personally hauled in a merc for you to fix.

word count: 2.1k

companion fic to "the body is a soft animal".

fic masterlist is here.

one

You emerged from the operating room, having discarded your soiled surgical gown and gloves, and it was dark again. The surgery went on for longer than you anticipated, even with Ieiri's help for the critical first hour or so. You let out a yawn, stretching your arms high above your head and relishing the way some of the tension in your body unfurled itself before slipping away.

Out of the corner of your eye, you spotted Gojou seated at your workstation with his chin on crossed arms and it struck you as atypical behaviour. Given some freedom, he almost always preferred to be tinkering with something or talking to someone. When he was in your clinic, he'd more than likely be found chatting up the talking vending machine he believed he stole from outside Kamo Tower rather than sitting down quietly and looking wistful.

"Seems like everything went well," Gojou said, without looking at you and without lifting his head.

His eyes were fixed on one of the two blank monitors in front of him. When he was in one of his more contemplative moods, you've proven to yourself that it was better to let him bounce his thoughts off you than ignore him. There was always less collateral damage when you indulged him.

You gave a hum of affirmation as you walked past him to the wall-mounted control panel across the room. Tapping on the screen, you selected some apple juice over ice for yourself and a sugary matcha milkshake topped with sweetened red beans for him.

"You're not usually this concerned about the mercs you hire," you said, coming closer to him so you wouldn't have to speak so loudly. "Does this one have a particular deficiency you forgot to disclose to me before surgery?" You pulled your swivel chair away from the corner of the room that Gojou had banished it to, and you took a seat beside him.

One of your service androids entered the room with two mugs before anything more was said. You picked up your drink with both hands, and you waited.

"Nothing of the sort," he said, coming alive as he beheld the shiny red beans crowning the green milkshake. When it came to Gojou, there were only a few moody episodes that an excessively sweetened matcha drink couldn't alleviate to some extent. For that, you were grateful.

He sat up to make a grab for his drink too eagerly. Slurping away, a good portion of the milkshake was on its way to his stomach before you put the straw of your own drink into your mouth. After a rather loud show of his appreciation when he came to the bottom of his mug, he said, "Nanami's one of the better mercs, is all. It'd be a pity if I lost him."

Gojou got up to place an order for a refill, and promptly sat himself back down. "Just for your information, he's the badge who talked my mother down when she tried to jump from the roof of our commercial building in Toranomon," he said, his dark sunglasses slipping down the bridge of his nose.

His Kiroshis lit up when he blinked; he paused in his little briefing about the merc you just operated on, tilting his face away from you slightly, as he took a call. You waited, sipping leisurely on your apple juice and wiping at the condensation that had formed all over the outside of your mug.

"Anyway!" Gojou's voice cut into your silent juice-drinking session. It must've been someone working under him in his corp on the other end of the call, since he made sure it took up as little of his time as possible. "When I first saw Nanami in the Limitless a couple of years ago, I immediately had it in mind to quickhack him from across the bar area. Thought he was there to arrest me. Turns out he became a merc! He's been doing gigs for me ever since."

As he spoke, it was you who came to the end of your drink. You set the now empty mug on a coaster to your right. "Then I hope, for your sake, that it's entirely worth it," you said. A service android brought in another matcha milkshake for him, and he scooped the mug up from their hands as if he hadn't yet had his first.

A long string of numbers flashed at the corner of your periphery. "Keep it, Satoru," you said, quickly transferring the same amount of money back to him. "It was an informative surgery, and that's a reward on its own. You know how high-risk procedures are rare to come by as a corporate ripperdoc."

Gojou frowned into his drink, and he pushed the tip of the straw out of his mouth with his tongue to further affirm his displeasure. "Can't I leave a tip for my best friend? Just take it," he said, the bottom of his mug giving a dull thud from the force of him putting it down on your workstation. You shook your head, and his frown deepened.

"You may waive my rent for this clinic for an equivalent amount, but I won't take your money," you said, turning away from him to check the time. The mechanical clock hanging on the far wall told you that you still had time for a nap before your next work appointment.

"Fine," he said, unnecessarily drawing out the word.

He was squinting at you with his face mostly turned away, as if biding his time before he expected you to give in and accept his payment. You were familiar with his patterns the same way he was familiar with yours; this never worked, but he always tried it.

"Rate the success of the surgery you just did," he said, and it was the end of the show. This exchange normally included more back and forths. He had never expressed even an iota of uneasiness about any merc that he brought to you for fixing. For the vast majority of the mercs he employed, his confidence in your ability was as absolute as the fact that the sun rose every morning. This one merc called Nanami was special to him in a way you didn't yet understand. Gojou had personally rushed the collected parts of the guy to your clinic, even if he was quite apparently past the flatlining stage, which was an anomaly in itself.

Even Ieiri had been called on to better the chance of this Nanami's resuscitation and subsequent survival. It surprised you when you caught sight of her hurrying in through automatic sliding doors behind Gojou. In all the years he poured into moonlighting as a fixer, he had never done that for anyone.

Gojou was not a person who freely assigned a value to the lives of other people. You knew that. He knew how well you knew this.

You set your elbow down on your workstation and leaned your cheek into an upturned palm. "Successful for now, in spite of the odds against it. However, further monitoring is needed to confirm his survival. Right now there's no way of ascertaining how well his body will accept all the cybernetic implants I've installed," you said, watching him and seeing that he was trying not to squirm. You were treating this Nanami with equal importance as any other person who came to you with Gojou's referral. Gojou obviously didn't appreciate it.

"I'll monitor him carefully," you said, giving in after seeing that he was starting to pick needlessly at the hair on the back of his neck. "Give him time to recover. If he doesn't, then you may do with the body in accordance with the terms stipulated in his contract in the event of incapacitation caused by an event on the job."

He exhaled with a small nod, looking as weary as if he had been the one in the operating room for the better part of the day instead of you. "Here's hoping," he said.

You followed the line of his gaze to the control panel on the far side of the room. Tapping on his knee to get his attention, you gestured to the screen when he looked up from his hands. "I'll have some souffle cheesecake brought in," you said.

Gojou was bouncing his leg in his seat when you sat down again. Immediately after you scooted closer to your workstation, he wilted over the surface of it, crossing his arms and burying his head in the space between them. Knowing that he was working through his thoughts by himself, you reached over to pat absentmindedly at his shoulder. He responded with an unintelligible groan, before he turned his head to look at you.

You waited for him to speak.

"What's special about him?" you asked instead, leaning out of the way when your service android came to take the three empty mugs on your workstation away for washing. "You've hired your share of capable mercs. They all make mistakes at some point, whether on a gig they accepted from you or not. You know this."

The door clicked shut as the service android left the room. Gojou hadn't yet graced you with an answer.

It was still dark outside. You still had time for a nap. The thought of it became more tempting, seeing as you had a question and your partner in conversation was loath to give a response to it. One glance at the clock, and you decided that you'd rather leave him to himself for a bit.

You stood up with the intention of excusing yourself to get some rest when Gojou captured your wrist, pulling on you. He pointed to your swivel chair with his other hand, and so you sat down again.

"I was the one who made the mistake that cost him everything you had to do in there," was how he started. He released your wrist to point to the door that led to the hallway where the operating room was. You didn't bother to turn around to give him some room away from your gaze.

He snatched at his sunglasses that had been sitting askew on his nose, and the pair of them clattered unceremoniously onto your workstation. "That Militech higher-up wasn't supposed to be there. Nanami was already in the position to klep the hard drive when I found out a VIP from their head office would be dropping by for a demo."

So that's what it was. It was never about the merc who was on the job; it was about him.

You reached over to the discarded sunglasses and folded them up nicely, pushing them across the space between the two of you only to stop a finger's width short of where he had planted his elbow. Gojou scoffed at the worthlessness of your action, but you took no offence. He hated making mistakes and the only thing he hated more than that was admitting them, so you let him have a little tantrum.

It was still dark outside when you saw his shoulders fall the slightest bit, and you counted it as a win.

"What's on that hard drive?" you asked, testing the waters in the wake of his fit of self-directed frustration. There was a tightening in the muscles of Gojou's jaw, and you were grateful that he was vain enough to insist on keeping his face predominantly organic. He'd be near impossible to read if he decided he wanted to trade whatever flesh was above his neck for chrome. It was one of the things that since you'd spent a fair amount of time studying it, you strongly preferred it if it stayed the same.

He slumped into the backrest of the chair he was sitting on, hoisted into your office from your makeshift living area upstairs. "Militech's been developing some ICE meant for military use. It's got a shiny and new machine learning algorithm that's performed much better than any I've ever seen," he said, idling away some time by spinning around in his swivel chair. "People in netrunning circles have been talking about a breakthrough like that for years, but no one's managed to get anything useful out of all that talking. Until now."

You picked up his sunglasses and set them on his face for him, and it almost pulled a smile onto his lips. "You can make what they've got better," you said, holding his face with both of your hands and resisting the urge to squeeze.

Gojou smiled this time, bright enough that the shadows hanging on beneath his eyes seemed to disappear. "Good-looking and sexy-brained netrunner like me can definitely manage it. Just you wait."

#jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen scenarios #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #nanami kento #fic #longfic: tui #kaija writes #kaija writes: jujutsu kaisen #cw: suicide #i'm putting phantom liberty on hold for this #this was fun to write #but #i can't wait for the part when reader and nanami are starting to catch feelings!!!#would like to attempt somewhat slowburn but let's see haha

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foundtherightwords · 1 year

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The Quiet Chaos - Chapter 3

Pairing: Billy Knight (Lethal White/Strike) x OFC

Summary: After a bad breakup throws her carefully-planned life into disarray, Esme has sworn off dating forever. However, when she forms an unexpected connection with a young man named Billy, who's dealing with his own struggles, Esme is forced to face the truth: sometimes you can't plan for love.

Warnings: mental health issues, angst, slow-burn, developing relationship, dysfunctional family, some violence (non-graphic), some smut

Chapter warnings: more stalkerish/manipulative ex

Chapter word count: 4.3k

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2

Chapter 3 - "T'aint what a horse looks like. It is what a horse be"

After the night Esme blocked Neil on her phone, Billy became more relaxed around her. Esme wasn't sure if it was simply because he had gotten used to her, or because he had seen her cry and therefore had softened towards her, but he started talking to her more openly, telling her more about himself, and even mentioning his childhood a little, though still not much about his family. One night, he came in as usual and found her with her nose buried in A Hat Full of Sky.

"What are you reading?" he asked.

"It's that book I told you about, with the White Horse—" Esme said, then remembered. "Sorry."

"No, 's alright, you don't have to—I don't mind talking about the Horse," Billy said. He added, rather stiffly, "My therapist told me I should talk about these things more. So I won't be so afraid of them." Esme noticed his fingers twitching slightly, but he didn't lift them to his nose and chest. "D'you know it grants wishes, the Horse? If you stand on the eye, turn three times, and make a wish, it'll come true."

"I haven't heard that," Esme said, happy that he seemed to be in a chatty mood. "Did you ever go up there to make a wish, when you were a kid?"

"Yeah," he said, his voice muted, his eyes elsewhere again. "I wished I were dead, so I could be with my mum."

Esme's heart pinched. She didn't know what to say. What could you say to something like that? Then Billy seemed to rally, pulled himself back to reality, and the cloud lifted. "'s funny, that Horse," he continued. "Didn't look like a horse. More like a dragon. It's on Dragon Hill too. I've always wondered, why'd they call it a horse?"

"'T'aint what a horse looked like. It is what a horse be,'" quoted Esme. Billy glanced at her quizzically. She tapped the book.

"You like those books a lot, don't you?" he asked.

Heat rose to Esme's cheeks. "Well, when your parents named you after one of the major characters, there are only two choices: either you end up hating the books with the fire of a thousand suns, or you love them," she said ruefully. "And I couldn't hate them! They're really good."

Billy looked at the book with a wistful eye. "I don't read much. Wish I could, but I can't concentrate."

Sympathy surged inside Esme. Reading was such an integral part of her life that she couldn't imagine what it would be like if she couldn't read. "Would you like me to read to you?" she asked. "I often read these to my brother and sisters, when they were younger."

Billy seemed taken aback, and Esme realized she was being too forward. "I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I don't know why I offered. I don't know how you feel about fantasy, and it's not the first book either, so it may be difficult to follow, but if you want—and you're not doing anything else—" She was rambling again. She had made it a point not to talk about her hobby with any of her co-workers or her exes, afraid they would laugh at her for it, a woman nearing thirty still obsessed with a series of fantasy novels. But somehow, with Billy, her enthusiasm kept slipping out. Perhaps it was because she felt certain he wouldn't judge her.

"I'm not doing anything," Billy said. "And I've never read any fantasy, so I don't know. We could certainly give it a try."

"Really?"

"Yeah, why not?"

That was certainly a much more eager response than she got from Neil, who had given her a mocking laugh when she tried to get him to read them. In hindsight, she should've seen that as the gigantic red flag it truly was. Fuck Neil, she thought darkly and picked up the book.

She read him the entire first chapter that night. Occasionally, she would lift her head from the book and watch Billy, who was sitting cross-legged on the floor, one hand absently scratching the puppies behind their ears, the other cradling his chin, his head tilted to one side. He seemed to be enjoying himself, and more than that, he was taking in the story—he laughed at the right places, asked all the right questions, and when she got to the quote about the Horse, his lips quirked up in a knowing grin.

What was it about Billy, she wondered, that made her so comfortable around him? He was clearly troubled, even if his trouble, whatever it was, only showed through in brief glimpses, like the whirlpools in an otherwise tranquil brook. But that didn't bother her. If anything, it made him a lot less intimidating than the confident, alpha male type that often approached her, drawn by her meekness. And the animals like him, not just the dogs, but the other pets that stayed at the clinic too. And he liked them. That was always a big indication of a good person.

Suddenly she realized she was considering him romantically, and sternly told herself to stop. He might not be interested. More importantly, she didn't want a relationship, not now, not ever, not again. Not when she was still smarting from her breakup with Neil. And certainly, not with a strange man struggling with things she didn't know and didn't understand, no matter how good he was with animals or how cute he was. He was cute though, in a rumpled, just-woken-up kind of way...

Her voice trailed off as she became lost in her thoughts, and Billy looked up. Esme quickly returned her attention to the book and fumbled to find her place again. She sneaked another look at Billy. His eyes were still on her, but rather than concentrating on her reading, he appeared to be looking at her, with a soft gaze that sent a blush to her cheeks. As their eyes met, he blushed as well, and looked away.

It was only when one of the puppies yawned loudly that Esme remembered how late it was. She finished the chapter and reluctantly put the book down. "If you like it, maybe you could try the audiobook version," she said, as Billy was leaving.

"Yeah," he replied. "But I think I prefer it when you read to me." Then he blushed again and ducked out of the door. Esme watched him disappear into the night, while trying hard to ignore the fluttery feeling in her chest.

***

There was one thing she could no longer ignore, though, and that was the matter of Angua and her puppies. Angua's leg had mostly healed, the puppies had started their weaning, and now Peter was getting on Esme's back again about how this was not a rescue center and how she must find a foster home for them. She kept trying to put it off, but she knew it couldn't be forever. She didn't want to admit that she'd gotten attached to them. Perhaps she could adopt one... She had always resisted the urge to get a pet. She told herself she interacted with them enough at work, and her pet might get jealous if she came home smelling of other animals, but the truth was that she was afraid of ending up as one of those old ladies with a house full of cats and dogs. That wasn't how her life was supposed to turn out. She was supposed to get married back in June, and honeymoon in Barbados, and settle into a house somewhere in West London. It was a basic and boring future, yes, but it was also safe and secure. But seven months ago, an accidental scroll through Neil's phone had brought that careful, perfect plan crashing down. She was only thankful that she'd discovered his infidelity before she put down any deposit for the wedding.

That didn't change the fact that becoming a crazy cat (or dog) lady was now a distinct possibility in her future...

But it's just one puppy! And they all need a good home!

Yeah, it always starts with just one, and then, before you know it, you're knitting a sweater out of dog hair...

Finally, unable to delay the inevitable any longer, she made a call to her friend Priya, who ran the local rescue center. Priya didn't sound very keen at first. "A mum and five pups?" she said hesitantly. "And the mum has a broken leg, you say?"

"Almost healed. I could keep them here until she's fully healed." That meant she got to keep them for another week, at least.

"I'd love to help, but we're pretty full up at the moment..."

"Please, Priya. It won't be long. They'll find homes in no time, I'm sure."

"Have you tried other centers? I can recommend one."

"Not that I don't trust your recommendation, but I'd be much happier knowing they're in your hands," Esme said, resorting to flattery. When Priya still hummed and hawed, Esme gritted her teeth and brought out her trump card. "If you take them, I'll get my mum to sign the latest Emerald book for Anjali." Anjali was Priya's little daughter.

As predicted, Priya jumped at that. "Oh, can you? She'll be thrilled to bits!"

"Of course." Esme hated using her mum's works as bribes, but needs must. Besides, Mum always sent Esme a box of her books (pre-signed, of course) anyway, so it was no trouble at all. Priya just didn't need to know that.

"Well, I guess we could make room for them. Hey, maybe your mum could write a book about this. Emerald Saves the Puppies! If she does, do you reckon she could put me in—"

"Gotta go. Cheers, Priya." Esme hung up, not wanting to hear the rest of Priya's prattle about book ideas. Why do people always do that? Don't they know that writers hate other people giving them ideas? Except for Mum. She'd love that. But Esme's days of giving her mum ideas for her books were over, a long time ago.

Her mind returned to more pressing matters—the dogs and how she was going to bear the parting from them.

She also wondered how she was going to tell Billy.

When the time finally came for Angua and her pups to leave the clinic, Esme made sure to sign up for the night shift. She waited until Billy arrived and asked for his help to remove Angua's cast and take one last X-ray, to make sure everything was healed. There was no need to sedate Angua, but the dog was always calmer in Billy's presence. Esme moved slowly, cutting away at the cast and pulling it down with more care than usual. Billy, keeping a close watch, made a fretful sound upon seeing the withered leg, but Esme assured him it was fine. "After all, she hasn't used that leg in six weeks," she said. "She'll be back on it in no time."

Stop stalling. Just tell him!

Esme took a breath, but before she could say anything, Billy turned to her. "Do you mind if we do some reading tonight?" he said. "I got the audiobook like you said, but you explain things while you read, and I can't do that with the audiobook."

It was the opening she needed. "Actually, maybe we could spend more time with the dogs tonight," she said. "They're going to the rescue center tomorrow."

His face fell, and for a moment, he looked so distressed that Esme almost reached out to give him a hug. "Don't worry, I'll make sure you could visit them at the center too," she said. "At least until they're adopted."

He turned away, fiddling with his hands, and turned to her again, with that soft, almost imploring look back in his eyes. "But..." he mumbled. Then he said in a rush, "But then I won't have any reason to visit you."

His voice was quiet, but it still hit Esme like a ton of bricks. It was not just because he had expressed an interest in her. It was also because she realized she felt the same way. Suddenly it became clear why she tried to keep the dogs around for as long as she could. Why she volunteered for most of the night shifts in the last month. Why she brought extra food to work. Why she kept her copy of A Hat Full of Sky at the clinic, in case he wanted her to read to him again. Why she took her time removing the cast.

She tried to remind herself that she didn't want this, that any relationship right now would just be rebound, that it wouldn't be fair to Billy, but all of her resolve disappeared when she was facing those big, brown, puppy-dog eyes. Maybe she could give it another try. Maybe they could take it slow. Or maybe it didn't have to be anything more than just the two of them spending time together, without taking it any further. That would be nice too.

"We can still see each other, you know," she said, her voice coming out more breathless than she'd expected. "I volunteer as a dog walker at the rescue center on weekends. You can join me. That way you can see both the pups and—and—me."

Billy's face broke into a smile, slowly, uncertainly, but this time, it remained, instead of flitting away like a frightened animal. "I'd like that," he said.

"Great! Why don't you give me your number, then I could text you the detail?"

When Billy pulled out his brick of a phone, Esme couldn't stifle a laugh. "I don't know people still use these!"

"It's simpler. I only need it for calling and texting," he said. "And it can't be traced," he added. Esme made no comment on that, but as she put her own number into his phone, she wondered, with a slight prickling sensation in her belly and a whisper of concern at the back of her mind, what she was getting herself into. But he was still smiling at her, a timid, amazed smile as if he couldn't quite believe his luck, showing the dimples she'd never seen before, and she felt that flutter in her heart again, drowning out her worry.

***

And so Esme told herself that they were not really dating, but not not dating either. Certainly their outings could hardly be called dates, not romantic ones at least. There was nothing romantic about being pulled along the curb by a dozen of rambunctious dogs or getting splashed by water and soap while bathing them. If they decided to get a takeaway afterward, it was usually with the other volunteers as well. In fact, their nights at the clinic were more intimate, as far as such things could be judged.

At least Billy didn't seem to mind. He happily went along with whatever Esme suggested, even if it was just dog walking and a Chinese after. When she asked if he wanted to do something else, he shrugged and said it was fine. She wondered if she was coming off too overbearing. That had always been a problem with Neil. Whenever she asked him to do things a certain way, Neil would tell her to stop being so bossy. He would tease her about it at first. Don't tell me what to do, I'm not one of your younger siblings. Then he'd started complaining. Christ, Esme, would it kill you to let me do things my way for once? And finally it had become accusing. Stop trying to make me into something I'm not! You're suffocating me! That's why I have to get out! That had been the end of their relationship.

But this isn't a relationship, remember? Just two people, having fun together. And Billy did seem to have fun. He remained a little shy, especially around the other volunteers, but every time they saw each other, he seemed to smile more and move with more ease, and that, in turn, eased her as well.

The puppies didn't stay at the rescue center for long. Just a few weeks after Esme dropped them off, they were put up for adoption and quickly went to their forever homes. Angua, on the other hand, remained. Esme had hoped that someone may want to adopt both mum and puppy as well, but it seemed there was none. So when Priya told her the last puppy had been picked up, Esme knew the little mum must be terribly lonely. She sent Billy a text.

Angua's last puppy left today. Wanna go cheer her up?

They met outside the rescue center that evening. It was Billy's day off from Asda, and there was still some sawdust in his hair and on his face when he showed up. Without thinking, Esme reached up and brushed it off, then drew her hand back, her face pink. Though Billy was looking slightly surprised but not displeased by her touch, Esme reminded herself that they were not-dating. They hadn't done anything that people on dates usually did, not holding hands, and certainly not kissing. She mustn't presume. "Sorry," she mumbled.

"No, 's alright," he said. That apology-reassurance exchange was becoming something of a refrain between them.

They found poor Angua lying in her kennel with her nose between her paws. She gave a little wag of her tail upon seeing them, but otherwise seemed uninterested in any treat or toy they offered. Even when they opened the kennel, she refused to move, her eyes fixed on the door, watching, waiting for her babies. In the end, they sat down on either side of the kennel, just keeping her company.

"Why don't you adopt her?" Billy asked.

Esme hesitated. "I work too much," she said lamely.

"You can bring her to work with you," he pointed out. "She knows the clinic already. It'll be like coming home to her."

How could she explain her fear to him? Oh, that poor girl, dumped by her fiancé, so she has to get a dog to fill the void in her life...

"Why didn't anyone want her?" Billy asked. "There's nothing wrong with her."

"Sometimes it's just bad luck," Esme replied. But even as she said it, she started to feel a strange affinity with the lonely, unwanted little dog. Angua had so much love to give, yet nobody knew it except for herself and Billy. It was up to them to give her a chance.

"You know what?" Esme said, turning to Billy with determination. "You're absolutely right." And if people felt sorry for her for living alone with a dog, so what? Who cares what other people think? It's an outdated, misogynistic notion anyway.

It took no time at all for Esme to complete the paperwork. Priya all but handed Angua to her right then and there. It was hard to say who was more excited, Esme, Billy, or Angua, as they walked out of the rescue center, Esme holding on to Angua's leash with one hand and finding Billy's hand with the other. "Thank you," she said, giving his hand a squeeze.

"For what?" he asked, confused.

"For talking me into it." And, surprised at herself, she kissed him softly on the cheek.

***

Esme had to work that night, so Billy accompanied her and Angua back to the clinic. "Poor thing. She probably thinks she's going to see her babies," Esme said remorsefully, when Angua's tail started helicoptering at the sight of the familiar building. "Sometimes I wish we could talk to animals, to explain things to them."

However, as they neared the clinic, Angua dropped her tail and a low growl started in the back of her throat. Esme leaned down to her. "What is it, girl?"

"Esme."

She looked up. A man had just stepped out from the pool of shadow next to the front entrance. Her heart missed a beat, then started pounding wildly when he walked into the light and she recognized him. Neil.

She tossed Angua's leash to Billy and strode forward. "What the hell are you doing here?!" she shouted, not caring who might hear.

"You wouldn't return my text. I really want to talk to you."

"How did you even know I'm working tonight?"

"Dianne told me."

Fucking Dianne. Next time I see her, I'll give her a few choice words about sticking her nose into other people's business...

"I have nothing to say to you," she said, trying to go past him. He blocked her way.

"Please, Esme, just five minutes. I haven't slept, I haven't eaten... I can't rest until we talk." She noticed that his hair was not as perfectly coifed as usual, and his jaws, often clean-shaven, were covered by a smattering of stubble. She coldly wondered if he rumpled himself up on purpose before coming here, as a ploy to get her sympathy.

"No, Neil. Not five minutes, not five seconds. We're done."

She pushed past him again. He tried to grab her arm, and she shoved him out of the way. Billy and Angua arrived at her side—she had almost forgotten that they were there. Angua was getting agitated now, her lips curled back to bare her teeth at Neil. "Let her go," Billy said. Esme couldn't see his face, but there was a sharp edge to his voice she hadn't heard before.

"Who the fuck is this?" Neil asked. "What are you doing with him?" He tried to put on a brave front but still stepped back warily.

"None of your business." She wasn't going to let Neil harass Billy as well. Billy took a step forward, but Esme held him back. Neil was not worth getting into trouble over.

Neil's eyes flicked between the two of them, to Esme's hand grasping Billy's tightly, then his nose wrinkled in distaste.

"You're going out with him?" he sneered. "Christ, you've lowered your standards."

Esme wanted to scream at him that he had no say in who she was going out with, but the mockery on his face angered her so much that she couldn't speak for a moment. It was the same look he had when she brought home a new book (How many books do you need?!) or a vintage dress (Why don't you buy something more modern?) or some cute knick-knack she found at a flea market (That looks like something in a nursing home!) She'd be damned if she let him get away with it this time.

"Yeah, I'm going out with him," she said. "And if you're anything to judge by, my standards have actually gone up. Now leave. If I ever see or hear from you again, I'm calling the police."

Neil opened his mouth, looking foolish, and shut it again. With one last glare at Billy, he skulked away. They heard the sound of a car door being slammed, and then Neil's flashy convertible roared down the road.

"You OK?" Billy asked.

Esme realized she was shaking, not from fear, but from anger. She must not let Neil affect her like that again. She tried to smile at Billy. "I'm fine."

"Was he your "

"My ex. Ex-fiancé, actually. The one that called me that night, remember?"

"The cheating bastard?"

She laughed. "Yeah."

Billy looked down the street, where Neil's taillights had disappeared. "Do you want me to stay with you?"

Her heart melted at that. "Thank you, but no. I'll be alright. Neil was a prick, but he's a cowardly prick. He won't come back. And if he does, Angua will defend me, won't you?" She picked the dog up and hugged her to her chest.

Billy nodded and turned to go, but he hesitated and turned back again. "About what you said to him..."

"What did I say?" She was so angry she could hardly remember.

"You said that you're... that we're... going out," he mumbled, avoiding her eyes. "Did you really mean that?"

"Oh." A flush crept over her face. She'd said it mostly to get back at Neil, but she would be lying if she said she hadn't been wondering about that in the past few weeks. She just wasn't sure what Billy thought. "I mean, we are, kind of, right? I know you've never really asked me out or—or—vice versa, and we haven't had an actual date or anything, but we've been hanging out for a while now, and..." Her voice gave out as she realized she didn't know what to say. This was the problem with getting into relationships. She never knew when to do what. Sometimes it felt like she'd missed a universal class on flirting and dating. It was all so terribly embarrassing.

"Please, go on with what you were going to say," he told her.

What was she going to say? Why didn't he just say it and help her out? But Billy was looking at her, his eyes wide with anticipation, and as usual, her composure evaporated in front of his gaze.

"Will you go out with me?" she breathed out.

And there was that smile again—that tentative smile that broke out on his face, slow like a winter sunrise, but also like the sun, it lingered and gave warmth to everything. "Yes," he said simply.

There was an awkward pause as they just stood there, not knowing what to do next. Should she kiss him? No, that would be too much for her in the span of one night. So she just smiled shyly back at him and ducked into the clinic. Then, remembering, she said over her shoulder, "I'll call you," before rushing inside.

Chapter 4

Taglist: @quinnypixie, @accidentalslag, @etherealglimmer

#billy knight #billy knight strike #cb strike #billy knight fic #billy knight x ofc #joseph quinn #joseph quinn fic #joseph quinn character

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marierg · 10 months

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Of Light and Darkness: The Rising Darkness part 2

Pairing: Obi Wan Kenobi X Reader

WARNINGS!: Cannon typical violence, language, Depressive and stress related descriptions, stim shots and over use of medications(didn't know so tagged in case), injuries & not appropriately treating them, JANGO FETT! (we love him! but definitely a warning)

A/N: I take no credit for the movie dialogue that is all the work of the wonderful Mr. Lucas! THIS IS A LOVING WORK OF FANFICTION!!! With that said I did take more than a few liberties but I tried to pull from the film and meld it into a cohesive piece. Much love to all the prequels and the folks there in!

PS- I've been stuck with writers block for these latest chapters so it's going REALLY SLOW! I am so sorry guys, I'm doing ma best. Definitely gonna take a break after this arc to build up a few chapters so hopefully this doesn't happen again.

Picture Credit: Lucasfilm and pinterest

Words: 7000

Masterlist Next

“Et nomine Kaf, et frappuccino, et soda and chocolate... Aaaaahhhh Fuck here we go.” You muttered the funny little chant to yourself before exiting the lift.

It was a long day already. The changeling's death, the autopsy, debriefing the council, the meeting with Padme; you were done with the day much less the week. The jorgan fruit to top this cake was the council riding roughshod over you all. Sending Anakin on this protection detail solo was not a good idea, especially after what Dorme had reported back.

Moping and complaining to you was one thing, but it wasn't acceptable on an assignment. Even less acceptable to the person they were assigned to protect. Taking a deep breath to remind yourself yet again that he was young and still maturing, you resisted the urge to knock sense into him repeatedly. Entering the guest room where Anakin was currently trying his best to get dressed did draw a wan smile though. He was fighting the material, trying to fasten it like a robe instead of a shirt.

“Pull that any harder and you won't have but your trousers and vest to wear.”

“You sound like Obi Wan,” Anakin turned sourly to you, he could already sense the lecture coming. “I'm a Jedi, not a fashion model.”

“Oooh someone's in a mood I see.”

Anakin threw up his hands in frustration, “I look like a puffer pig on Lifeday eve.”

“Yes, but a very handsome puffer pig.”

“Yeah right,” Anakin was fighting a smile.

“Well it still looks good on you.” You waived off his hands and started refastening the loose shirt then handed him the over coat. “Last time I helped you like this was your first days as our Padawan, now it's your first big solo mission.”

“Master Y/n?” Anakin felt a ripple in your signature, wistful and sad. “I promise we'll be fine, you don't have to worry.”

Raising an eyebrow you hummed in your throat, “I wonder sometimes if there is something that I have forgotten... some nugget of wisdom that hasn't yet been passed. Have I done all that is possible to protect and guide you?”

Anakin had towered over you for a few years now and yet it still felt like he was that small boy sitting with you at the pond. He felt you take his hand, giving a squeeze looking up at him with those knowing eyes. Casting his own gaze to his boots Anakin felt his cheeks warm in embarrassment, “Guess I've been a bit dumb huh?”

“Just young. ” Letting go to tug at his braid you watched as a smile quirked up. “Hey look I'm no council member, but I do have a little wisdom that I haven't quite passed on that you may need for this mission.”

You reached a hand into your robes to retrieve a small object, one that had lived in your desk for sometime. You had hoped that it would be a while yet till he needed this, but you could no more stop the passage of time than to stop the flow of the living Force. Perhaps you were so cautious with Anakin because of your own misfortunes, maybe it was the few rough missions and close calls. Taking the bracelet that matched Obi Wan's you fastened it to his wrist, slowly letting the words flow.

“You have the biggest heart Anakin Skywalker and you're a damn fine apprentice. I have no doubt that you can protect yourself and Senator Amidala from whatever gets thrown your way. Yes I will worry, but only because I care for you so much and want you safe. As your Master though, I know that I must let you go no matter how hard that is for me. We will be with you always and if you ever doubt it just look right here.” Tapping the bracelet you took a deep breath and glanced up at those bright blue eyes. They were different from Obi Wan's, more mirthful and cocky. You never wanted that mirth to leave him, you'd spare him any heartache if you could, but that was life and so your apprentice must take the good with the bad as you all did. “Now about that big heart.”

“Master I...”

Holding up a hand you smiled again at the young man. “I'd be a pretty big hypocrite if I shot your feelings down right now wouldn't I?”

“I don't know...”

“Yes you do.” Quirking up a brow at your apprentice and giggling at the blush that now spread up to his ears. “Don't tell Obi Wan though, he likes to think he's so sneaky. And I'm sorry that I was so remiss in advising you before all this started.”

“Well it's not like Jedi usually have significant others.” Anakin snarked.

“Be that as it may, I do have a little advice. Be honest and tell her how you feel, what you admire, what you think. Listen to what she has to say instead of thinking that you're right all the time. Don't let your pride speak where your heart should. And above all else never let your pride and heart out pace your brain... if anyone could testify about that it's me.” Giving his hand a last squeeze you stepped back to get one last glance at him, no longer the boy but the man.

Anakin glanced down at his feet again, “What if she doesn't feel the same way?”

“That is the risk we take,” using your finger to tip his chin back up you gave him a kind look. “Either way at least you'll know, which is better than wallowing in the what if's. Take your shot kid, the Force will be with you.”

“As it is with you Master.”

______

“Sarinysium is hard stuff to come by kiddo... even harder to produce correctly,” Maffa studied his young friend from across the desk. Bone and soul tired like you hadn't slept in several days, and then there was the small fact that you had come to him for information. While he was more than happy to oblige you, Maffa also knew that you didn't turn to him for help lightly. Must be a real emergency, he figured. “With a concentration and distillation of this quality though... a few that come to mind.”

“Anyone from the planets that have left the Republic?” You swirled the amber liquor clinking the ice on the sides of the glass. You wouldn't breathe easy till Anakin checked in from the hiding place and were also anxious to hear what Obi Wan had found out from Dex. You didn't have the premonitory gifts of your Master, none the less you felt the edge of war's knife at the throat of the galaxy. Looking to the old gangster you saw that even he could tell the tides were changing.

“One or two but the one that comes most to mind is a planet called Kamino. Lot of war profiteers, cloners that make armies for hire, weapons manufacture and testing.” Maffa took a sip of his own glass, pursing his lips. “Y/n please let someone else handle this. These type of folks mood changes with the wind and the highest bidder.”

“I wish I could... but duty calls.” Downing the last of your drink you smiled at your friend. “Besides you know Obi Wan will keep track of me well enough.”

Maffa sighed heavily, but shrugged his shoulders and wrote some information on a flimsy for you. As you grasped the sheet he took hold tightly. “Just be safe little Y/n. If someone has brought back a weapon like this, there's no telling what they have up their sleeves.”

Giving Maffa a hug you promised to come back by after your mission. You called Obi Boy, he had found a similar lead to the mysterious planet Kamino and was headed to the Archives. By the time you had arrived though he had struck a dead end there and apparently upset Master Nu in the process. With the two of you at a loss you thought on what Master Melri would do. “Well when in doubt, find a wiser adult.”

“I think Master Yoda is teaching sabers to the younglings today.” Obi Wan gazed down at your haggard appearance, sighing at the sight. As the two of you made your way down the halls he pulled you into one of the blind corners. Circling his arms around you and pressing a kiss to your head. “You look a fright wee one, here let me help.”

“Sorry, I haven't even been back to our quarters yet.”

Obi Wan turned you so he could fix your ponytail. He could also tell that you'd been subsisting on nothing but Kaf by how shaky your body was. You spun in his arms laying your head against his sternum. Laying his head to yours Obi Wan sighed knowing that this was exhausting for the both of you. “Come wee one, let us consult with the most adult person we know.”

“Don't think, feel with the Force. Help you it will.” Yoda focused on the small ones before him. Young though they were, strong and skilled were they too. Much like a great garden these younglings minds simply needed nurturing and time for them to reach their potential. Sensing the approaching knights Yoda clacked his staff on the floor. “Younglings, Younglings visitors we have.”

“Hello Master Kenobi and Master L/n.”

"Hello Younglings,” Obi Wan gave a small smile. “We're sorry to disturb you Master.”

“Teddy Bear Clan! How's your class today lil squishes?” A wave of giggling bounced around the room. You smiled at the group of children, no matter how tired you were, seeing them certainly buoyed your spirits. Now if you could remain upright that'd be a trick.

Yoda laughed at your greeting, “What help to you can I be?”

“Why don't you take the lead Obi Boy, I'm gonna test the structural integrity of that post.”

“Indeed, we shall see whom crumbles first.” Obi Wan tried to hide his grin, instead focusing more on the wise Master before him. “We're looking for a planet described to us by separate acquaintances, but it doesn't appear in the archives.”

“Lost a planet have you? How embarrassing... how embarrassing. Liam, the shades,” Master Yoda raised the reader and gestured for all to come closer. “Gather around the map reader, clear your minds and find this lost planet we will.”

With the room darkening your mind started to really blank, so very tempted to fall asleep right there standing against the pillar. Instead you tracked Obi Wan as he paced the room.

“It ought to be here, but it isn't.” Obi Wan shook his head at the empty space on the map.

You nodded in agreement, “Maffa said the same, right between Scarif and the Rishi moon.”

“Gravity is pulling all of the stars in the system to this spot.” Obi Wan looked to you. “What do you think darling?”

“Nothing good I can tell you that.”

“Gravity's silhouette remains, but the star and all of its planets have disappeared. How can this be?” Yoda gazed at his charges, young and old alike. “Hmm a thought? Anyone?”

One little hand raised, their voice so very calm, “Master, it's because someone erased it from the archive memories.”

“Truly wonderful the mind of a child is. The Padawan is right, go to the center of gravity's pull and find the missing planet you will.” Yoda began to walk towards the hallway, the two knights following.

“Master Yoda who could have emptied the data from the archives? Isn't that impossible?” Obi Wan did not like where this evidence was leading.

“Dangerous and disturbing this is, only a Jedi could have erased those files. But who and why, harder to answer... meditate on this I will.” Yoda hummed thinking about all that had transpired in the last 24 hours. How was it that he and the Council could not have sensed this? How and why the Senator were drawn in was troubling as well. Looking at the two weary knights he sighed. “Rest now and this afternoon depart for this mystery planet you shall.”

Both of you bowed and headed to your quarters. Over and over the darkest of thoughts and more came to mind, and unfortunately none that you could outright dismiss. Making it in the door you flopped on the couch, Obi Boy set an alarm and then pulled you in close. He ran his hand through the mess that was your hair, gently stroking it as you held him tighter. “Maffa thinks I should sit this one out.”

“Then he and I are of the same mind. Would that I could send you to look after the boy instead, but I require your brilliant intellect.” Obi Wan sighed raising his other hand to scrub his face.

“How do you want to play this?” Resting your chin to look up at him you blinked and almost fell asleep right there. It was hard to resist the warm safety of his embrace.

Obi Wan hummed in his chest, “First we shall rest, then simply take things in our stride as we progress.”

“So very wise,” your head slumped to nestle into his strong chest. “Love you.”

“And I you wee thing.”

________________

“There it is, our missing planet.” Obi Wan turned back to you in the fighter. Seeing you knees to chest and dead to the world asleep gave him a grin. Reaching back through the seats to tap you awake he laughed at your grumbles. “Wake up sleepy kaf gremlin, we're here.”

You blinked owlishly and gazed out the canopy as the ship descended through the atmosphere. “Oh goodie... rain.”

“Come now we must put on our best faces.”

Making the mad dash to the door of the landing platform and looking like drenched rats was not going to make a good first impression. Wringing out your ponytail caused Obi Wan to snort. "Not...a ... word."

Obi Wan only smirked, quirking an eyebrow.

A tall being with the most remarkable obsidian eyes greeted you. “Master Jedi, welcome to Tipoca City. The Prime Minister is expecting you.”

“Oh this is getting weirder and weirder...” you glanced at your Obi Boy.

Obi Wan tried to keep neutral expression, “We are expected?”

“Of course! After all of this time we were starting to think you weren't coming.” The being before them began to walk and gestured to follow. “I am Tuan We, administrator and one of the overseers of this facility.”

“Pleased to meet you.” you studied the taller being in fascination. “This is Master Obi Wan Kenobi and I am Healer Y/n L/n.”

“What are you up too?”

“Just trust me, scientists talk to other scientists... networking.”

Taun We looked intrigued by that, “I've never met a Jedi Healer before, perhaps you would enjoy a tour of the medical facilities while Master Kenobi meets with the Prime Minister?”

Obi Wan stroked at his beard to hide a smirk, “Very clever.”

“That would be wonderful, also do you mind if I ask a few questions?”

"I would be happy to answer," Taun We inclined her head and long neck to the female, "I would be most interested to ask you about your work as well."

You smiled, "Excellent."

You managed to keep Taun We busy right up until you entered the Prime Minister's office. Introductions were made, Prime Minister Lama Su extending the offer that since you had both arrived so late in the evening that a full inspection would be organized in the morning.

“Thank you, we feel most welcome.” Obi Wan smiled over the cup of tea that had been brought in.

Lama Su studied these Jedi with a keen eye. “You'll also be pleased to know that we are on schedule. 200,000 units are battle ready with a million more on the way.”

“I'm sorry units?” Your ears perked at the term.

“That is... great news.” Obi Wan gave you a look. “Wait and see wee one.”

“Please tell your Master Sifo Dias that his order will be met on time.” Lama Su further gauged their reactions. Either this was as unexpected for the Jedi as for the Kaminoans or something was greatly amiss.

“I'm sorry who...” Obi Wan was now quite startled.

You were equally shocked, “Did you say Master Dias?”

“Yes. Master Sifo Dias is still a sitting member of your Jedi Council is he not?”

“Master Sifo Dias was reported missing and presumed killed almost 10 years ago.” Obi Wan placed the cup down to watch the being across from them. As soon as one clue was found, a new mystery was revealed.

“Obi Boy...”

“I know sweetling.”

Lama Su dipped his head, “I'm so sorry to hear that, but I'm sure he would be proud of the army we've built for him.”

“The Army...”

You quickly covered for Obi Wan's shock, “That's why we're here. Though some of the data has been lost to us since his passing, did Master Dias say who this army was for?”

“Why for the Republic of course.” Lama Su Rose and opened the portal to the viewing platform off the office. “Magnificent aren't they?”

You and Obi Wan stepped forward to row upon row of troopers for as far as the eye could see. Each of the signatures was so unique yet all wore the same uniform blending seamlessly into the other. Looking at Obi Wan with a wide expression he nodded back. “Obi Boy what have we gotten ourselves into?”

“This is bigger than any of us could have imagined...”

The Prime Minister gave a short viewing tour, highlighting the best of the genetic modifications made to these beings. Obi Boy had to calm you a few times when the Kaminoans referred to the men as “Items”. While the science of cloning had been around for some time you were fascinated by the advancements that the Kaminoans had made. That they managed to avoid the pitfall of clone madness thus far by balancing out the growth stages was quite the trick.

All in all from the surface a well run facility. While Obi Wan had continued on with Lama Su, you were escorted to the medical research wing to meet with their head researcher Nala Se. The female Kaminoan was different from her counterparts, speaking more kindly regarding the beings that were under their care, but none the less regarding them as a product.

“And what other research regarding combat is performed?” You were looking over the records of the Alpha series of clones.

Nala Se tilted her head, “I'm not sure I understand Healer L/n?”

“It's just that in my experience most militaries have an R&D for weaponry, medical research, technology... I was curious if that was similar here?”

Taun We was quick to answer, “Our weapons research is conducted elsewhere, closer to the armory.”

“So ballistic and plasma based items?” You stated the question with the same detached ease as you would a post operative report. There was a spike between the two other beings, “I'll take that as a no?”

“We have in the past done other weapons research, but it was shut down years ago and now only kept in the high security areas. I trust that you'll understand that I cannot show you those without proper clearance.” Taun We eyed the Jedi, she was an intelligent being for a human. Lama Su had warned to watch both of their guest carefully.

“Being in the RRC I've responded to many places where Bioligics have been used, I was curious if you had any new advances in treatment perhaps?”

Nala Se's eyes did widen at that, “Of course we would be happy to share our data to help those affected.”

“Not a pleasant business Biologics,” you kept a pulse on their signatures, “the worst I ever saw was sarinysium. Terrifying stuff, gone in the blink of an eye...”

The two Kaminoans became uneasy at your mention, body language changing subtly.

“I apologize, sometimes I tend to ramble.” You looked to Nala Se who kept eyeing the report in your hand. “These Alpha troopers are quite the group, why weren't more of them created?”

Nala Se seemed to relax at the question and change of topic, “We found them to be far too strong willed to create in large numbers. It seemed better to have them as leaders among the ranks.”

You nodded, “Ah, well thank you very much for your time and hospitality. I look forward to the demonstrations tomorrow.”

As you were escorted through the halls you mulled over this new piece of the puzzle. You had only briefly met Master Dias during your time as a Padawan, he had been a good and loyal member of the order. Why then had he done this?

Angry yelling coming from the hallway ahead drew your attention as quickly as your feet, old instincts kicking over. Turning the corner you saw a group of clones carrying one of their own. Without thinking you removed his helmet and began to palpate where you saw blood. It was your first real look at the men, you weren't sure if this one was in shock at seeing you or if the expression was from the pain of his injury.

“What happened?”

The men looked at you as though you sported horns and a second head. “Uh... Ma'am?”

“It's alright I'm a healer, now what happened?”

The trooper who was being supported crumpled to the ground causing the focus to shift. As you knelt to check the injured clone he tried to be nonchalant. “Fell in the simulation, think I blacked out for a bit... just startled my squad is all.”

“Is that true?” Taun We questioned.

The rest of the men shifted restlessly, till one spoke out. “One of the training droids malfunctioned, fired after the exercise ended. He fell from the ledge."

"How far?" You fired off the question while checking pupil reaction.

"I'd say 6 meters ma'am."

“Uh huh,” Looking at the injured man you pulled out your best smile. “Alright handsome let's just be sure that hard head didn't crack. Let me see now, this may feel a little strange.”

Placing your hands to cup his face and reaching with the Force you soon found the problem. A hemorrhage causing intracranial pressure that would kill the man before he could make it to a medbay. He was deteriorating quickly pupils unequal, his pulse was racing under your fingertips. Glancing at the others gathered you instructed them to hold the patient steady. Focusing you began to channel and mend the broken vessels, breathing and heart rate returning to normal. Slowly opening your eyes you saw warm brown ones staring back alert and bright. “How do you feel now handsome?”

Who was this strange woman, not an instructor for certain? When CC-3636 felt those gentle hands on his pounding head he figured that was that, end of the line before he even saw combat. Then a warm feeling as the pain went away, gentle smile easing his fears. Seeing Taun We watching the interaction brought him back to reality quick enough. Sitting up straight he gave a crisp reply, “Much better ma'am, I'll report to my next training rotation with my squad.”

“The hell you will, you're going with me to the medbay and getting a second look at, isn't that right?” Looking up at Taun We you saw the subtlest nod. Helping the much taller man to his feet you couldn't help but appreciate the sheer stature of all the clones. Their progenitor must be truly impressive if these were any indication. Unfortunately you also wobbled like a fawn having gotten up too quickly and fell against your patient. “Kark... Sorry!”

CC-3636 smirked at the little thing, barking orders one minute then skittish the next. He linked her arm through his and marched toward the medbay. “Quite all right ma'am.”

Obi Wan meditated by the window of the guest quarters, it was spartan but spacious. The bounty hunter was here, of that Obi Wan was certain, but what his underlying motivations were... that was yet to be discovered.

You were resting after an eventful afternoon, resting even as tired and annoyed as your were. Obi Wan had sensed your feelings from the minute that the Kaminoans had referred to the beings under their care as objects. He was a guardian but in many ways you too were one. Your respect and compassion towards all beings was one of the many things he admired. Even drained as you had been you couldn't stop babbling about the troopers you had encountered... and the fact that none of them had a name.

“Obi?” You padded over to where he sat by the window, storm raging on the other side. When he didn't respond you decided to join him, taking a seat in his lap. Warm strong arms wrapped around and trapped you against his chest. Leaning your head back you waited for him to speak first, far too afraid of your own thoughts.

“You were a loth cat in a prior life darling.” He kissed the side of your neck. “What is it?”

“I sense darkness lurking around the poor souls here.” A tear slipped loose at the intrusive thought and of the old pain trying to break loose again. “How can life be created simply to die...”

“All life ends y/n, but we go on in the Force.” He felt your head shake.

“They were born to die for someone else's fight, for someplace they've never even seen, a choice that was never theirs to make. How can anyone use other beings like that?”

“Ahh... You know as well as I that not all beings in the universe have everyone's best interest in mind. That not all have the same virtues and heart.”

Playing with his hands nervously you considered what had woken you, “I saw something Obi Boy... something terrible.”

“Show me.”

Opening you signature to his own the same images flashed in rapid succession. War, pain, the red of a sith's lightsaber, death.... swirling so quickly that it was hard to catch one before the next came. He could feel the shudder running through your body, the cold sweat rising. Obi Wan ran his hands at your side to soothe and comfort. Turning to look you in the eye he could see the dark set in.

“Can we stop it? Can we save them?” Tears rolled down your cheeks thinking again of the man you had healed but a few hours before. He didn't know that his eagerness for battle was simply the naivete of one who had yet to even really live.

Obi Wan kissed your forehead softly, holding you tight, “I hope so sweetling... for all our sakes.”

___________

Jango Fett paced the small common area in his quarters, occasionally peering in to watch his son sleep. What he would give to dream so soundly, but those days had long departed. He had spotted the sleek starfighter as he landed his own ship. Lama Su had informed him that the Jedi had finally come to see the war cattle that had been created from his genetics. He knew well enough that wasn't the only reason for their appearance.

This was just a job like any other, with the exception of the son he loved dearly. Of all the things that had come of his work these last 10 or so years Boba was the one that he never regretted. Glancing to the buildings at the far side of the floating city his thoughts drifted again to the two visitors. “Alright Jetii your move...”

“Boba is your father here?” The small boy at the door nodded, “May we see him?”

Boba pursed his lips seeming uncomfortable, “Sure.”

“I don't think he likes strangers.” You tried to give the boy a smile which he returned even if shyly. His look turned to a sneer when he looked at Obi Wan.

Obi Wan raised a brow, “I think he likes you better than me.”

Entering into the small apartment you heard Boba call for his father. It was much like the one that the two of you had stayed in, though you could feel the echos of happy memories here. Hearing movement from the bedroom you turned to see a striking man coming towards you. He moved with a lethal grace and an aura of command. It was his face that truly struck you, scared and battle hardened version of the younger clone from the day before.

Taun We bowed her head at the man, “Welcome back Jango, was your trip productive?”

“Fairly.” Jango had quickly sized up the male, a fighter and cocky for sure, not a problem if push came to shove. The female was... intriguing. Turning to face the shorter woman he put on a flirting smile, making his tone lighter. “And you are?”

Your mind blanked at the intensity of his gaze. It wasn't that you weren't used to flirting, just that this felt altogether different, like a test of sorts. Fortunately Taun We stepped in.

“This is Jedi Master Obi Wan Kenobi and Jedi Healer Y/n L/n, they've come to check on our progress.”

Jango watched as the healer offered a hand in greeting, maybe trying to regain their footing. Pretty little thing, not his type but none the less there was something charming about her. Taking your hand Jango raised it to his lips and gently pressed a kiss. “Welcome to Kamino.”

You swallowed hard, “Thank you.”

Obi Wan watched as this Jango released your hand and walked towards him. He raised an eyebrow and tried to appear unaffected by the little exchange. “Your Clones are very impressive, you must be very proud.”

“I'm just a simple man trying to make his way in the galaxy.” Jango gazed impassively at Kenobi, then darted his eyes briefly to you. Your attention had fallen to Boba and his Djarik board. It was a game that they had started just before he left on this last assignment, she was studying the board in interest. Jango resisted a smirk when you shook your head at his son's next play.

“Ever made your way far as Couriscant?” Obi Wan had used the man's momentary distraction to look past into the room by the door, the metallic glint of armor catching the light.

Jango caught the line of the other Jedi's sight even as he pressed in his move to the board, whispering for Boba to close the door. He inched into your space crowding and then brushing past you to face Kenobi again, “Once or twice.”

Obi Wan fired back, “Recently?”

“Possibly...” Jango could see that this Kenobi didn't like him getting near the woman, how interesting. He leaned on the table close to you, smiling and giving a wink. “Though I have thought of passing by more often. Such a beautiful place with such... marvelous people.”

“You must leave a trail of broken hearts in your wake Mr. Fett.” You saw the hunter cock his head.

Jango rather liked this Jetii, “I've never had any complaints.”

"Probably far too busy to hear them, you seem more a man of business," leaning slightly closer you glanced down at his lips then back to that hawkish gaze. A flirting smile passed your lips, "and seldom one of ... pleasure."

"Being trapped in that Temple of yours mesh'la what would your know of such things?" If the Jeti'ika wanted to play then who was he to deny her.

“Hmm...Well I've never had any complaints.” You kept eye contact, smirking. Master Melri always said when men flirt their guard was at it's lowest. However Jango may like the game he still wasn't giving you anything. Obi Wan on the other hand was not happy with the exchange. You could feel the territorial protectiveness in his signature spiking and while it was comforting it also wouldn't help. “Easy Obi...”

“I'm fine.”

“Bantha Shit. Mission first...Besides you know I only have eyes for you sweet man.”

Obi Wan gritted his teeth & attempted to reign in his temper, now trying a different avenue. “Then you must have met Master Sifo Dias.”

“Master who?”

Ah, now there's something. Obi Wan circled closer to Fett, “Sifo Dias, was he not the Jedi that hired you for this job?”

Jango didn't like that the knight had caught him off guard, deciding to keep this discussion to the point. “Never heard of him.”

“Really?” You now came to stand beside Obi Wan. “Then how...”

“I was hired by a man called Tyranus, on one of the moons of Bogden.”

“Curious,” You murmured absently, “must be an associate.”

Jango looked between the two, setting a challenging gaze at Kenobi, “Do you like your Army?”

“I look forward to seeing them in action.” There was a ghost of a smile on Obi Wan's face.

“They'll do their job well, I'll guarantee that.”

You watched the two men posture, like rivals testing the waters. You had caught sight of the armor too and old tales of Mandalorian fighters scratched at the surface. This man had the cold eyes of a killer for certain, but he also loved his son dearly as evident by the many trinkets and their strong bond. A man of many facets.

Was Jango truly a part of whatever was transpiring or simply a pawn? The aura surrounding the boy was clear and curious; whatever the father's dealings Boba didn't seem privy. Either way nothing more would be gained with further discussion now. “Thank you for answering our questions Mr. Fett, we're very sorry to have intruded.”

“Please call me Jango.” Again he saw the small flash of jealousy in Kenobi's eyes as he looked back at him. “Always a pleasure to meet a Jedi.”

As their guests left Jango could see his son was as uneasy as he was. Dooku had not told him what the contingency was if the Jedi came sniffing around, but he recognized the danger of the situation well enough. Looking at his son, his decision was made.

“Pack your things, we're leaving.”

__________

“Great karking plan!” You yelled watching the armored man fly off. “What happened to 'just having a talk?'”

“He's Mandalorian,” Obi Wan gritted his teeth, “That is how they talk!”

The ship on the platform was powering up it's weapons systems. Dashing towards the front of the craft you tried to signal the very scared kid in the cockpit. Taking cover by a pillar you focused trying to influence the boy through the Force, “You want to power those down Boba. This is a bad idea, power down the weapons.”

The guns gave a short burst towards Obi Wan, so much for the power of persuasion. Dashing towards the ramp you felt arms grip you from behind and your feet leaving the ground. “Dank Ferrik!!!”

“Don't move Jetii.” Jango held fast to the woman while flying. He kept a keen eye on Kenobi, “Your choice me or the woman?”

“Get him Obi!”

Obi Wan waited till Fett flew close then gave a running kick at the man, causing you to fall. All three of you went sprawling on the platform. Obi Wan went on the defensive, quickly disarming the hunter of his pistol. The three of you began to trade blows though Fett effortlessly deflected both of you. You attempted to jump on the man's back to pull his helmet off and earned a broken nose for your efforts.

“Poor decision sweetheart,” Jango flung the woman across the platform before spying Kenobi trying to retrieve his weapon. Wrapping the man with a cable he set to the air, a dunk in the ocean would take care of the problem well enough.

Obi Wan knew that if Fett was able to get him over the water this fight would not end in his favor. Turning and gaining his feet again he reached out for a post to hold tight and hopefully anchor in. He almost lost his footing when you slid into him. “Y/N!”

“I got ya, pull!” The sudden loss of slack caused the hunter to crash, jet pack flying wildly before exploding. That didn't stop Jango from being quick to retrieve his pistol, nor Obi Wan to forget that he was attached to the hunter as he ran past to kicked him off the platform.

“Oh not good...”

Splashing across the platform you saw as Fett detached the cable. “OBI!”

A few moments later you could still feel him in the Force, signature still bright. “I'm Alright, keep them busy.”

“On it.” Racing to the ramp of the Firespray you quickly found the boy. The angry look on your face must have frightened Boba and you quickly softened to his fear. You held out your hands trying to deescalate this situation. “Boba I want you to come with me...”

“NO! WHERE'S MY DAD?”

“I'm not going to hurt you. Come, we're going to see Taun We and get this sorted. It's not safe...” The Force spiked a moment before the danger struck. Turning quickly to deflect the shots from Jango's blaster you weren't able to see Boba reach for the one in the hold.

Your body fell limply to the ground, Boba nudging you just to be sure the stun worked. Looking up at his father,the boy smiled. “We got them good didn't we Dad.”

“Yes we did son,” Jango picked up the Jedi and secured her in the janitors closet of the hall. Normally he would have held onto her for information, but where they were going he didn't want to be tracked. Killing the woman wasn't part of the job, Jetii or no, so he would leave her for the Kaminoans to deal with. Checking her pulse and finding it steady Jango turned to leave. “For your sake mesh'la... don't follow.”

Obi Wan dashed back inside out of the rain after having just missed the departing ship. Blast it all, how had they gotten away and where were you? Slicking his wet hair back he reached out to try to find you, “Y/n, where are you sweetling?”

“Ooooohhhhh.... my head, what in the sith hells?”

Glancing around he opened a side closet door just grabbing hold as your tumbled out. Nose bloody and blinking at the bright light, all things considered it could be worse. “Just tidying up are we?”

“Ha ha ha... Hrrrrgh, kid got the drop on me, kriffin' hells!”

Obi Wan hummed hauling you to a stand, “Well I dare say you'll have another chance at him. I managed to place a tracker, do you think you can manage?”

“Lemme at 'em!” You tried to walk but only succeeded in almost falling down. Obi Boy shook his head and picked you up. You grimaced, “Next time you and Anakin can investigate and I'll go with the Senator to the cool hideout.”

“I'm inclined to agree. Now heal thyself so we can run our quarry to ground.”

As the ship left the atmosphere you pondered again just how well your Padawan was doing on his own? Were there more hunters waiting in the wings, had the two managed to stay hidden?

“Wee one?”

“Hmm.”

“Are you sure you're alright? That was a gruesome hit...” Obi Wan paused feeling your small hand reach forward to squeeze at his bicep.

“I shouldn't have let my guard down, I'm sorry.” You pressed your head to the back of his seat. “some help I am...”

“You are doing well Y/n.” Obi Wan squeezed and stroked his fingers against your hand soothingly. “The fact that you're exhausted from overstretching your abilities and still standing is a wonder of stubborn will. Any other healer would have been put on rest by now from so much, you've treated how many critical wounds in the last two days? And on top of that been in how many altercations?”

“Two not a big deal.” You cringed and tried to change the subject. ”Don't forget to scan the exit point.”

Obi Wan rolled his eyes at your evasiveness, “Four counting yourself and that changeling. You've barely slept or eaten dear girl."

You felt even more guilty now for not taking better care and for flubbing up, "I'm sorry..."

Reaching over Obi Wan took your hand, gently kissing the knuckles. "Nothing to be sorry for wee one. Give yourself some grace darling. Why don't you eat one of those red biscuits and if you would hand me one too please.”

There was a pit in your stomach, but you did as he asked. Flying through hyperspace you released Obi Boy's arm handing him the biscuit, “Toss me back the blue pack by the controls.”

You could hear Obi Boy grumbling in his throat as you took out one of the pre loaded syringes. Taking a deep breath you stuck it into the muscle of your thigh, medications taking effect immediately. Taking stims was an unfortunate necessity when you got this tired, it was never something you enjoyed. The medications made you jumpy and your attention shorten. Slipping another injector away in your pockets, you handed the rest of the pack back forward. You took hold of Obi Boy's arm again, wishing you could hold his hand instead.

“I don't like when you have to use those.” Obi Wan stroked at his beard worriedly. He had hoped that their investigation would have ended on Kamino so that you could return and rest. Unfortunately the universe as always, mocked his wishes even if it wasn't for himself. “Are you sure that you're able to continue? We can always track the ship then call for assistance.”

You sighed, “I'll be alright and the sooner we finish this the better. So lets go find us a bounty hunter.”

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