#i'm working on stuff so take this vid my friend posted

[mt-oe]

Hi!!! Hope you're still doing alright because you said you were writing in the hospital 😭💦 whatever happens I hope you will recover soon and keep yourself safe/stay healthy!

And I want to say that I really like the way you write about Mizu, you write it in a way that doesn't look OOC and makes me feel like I'm in the story, through the way you write I can feel how much you spent. time and love to complete a story and I really enjoyed it 😭‼️ I'm a picky person when it comes to choosing fics to read about Mizu but your stories blew me away! ! I hope that in the future you will continue to give love to Mizu and continue to write Mizu x reader stories like that and I will continue to support you 😭🫶

Also, I have this idea I wanted to share it's about the reader being someone active on the internet like she always caught the trend and filming clips online like on tiktok or some, and sometimes makes videos with Akemi! She's always looked like a carefree person but in her private draft, she posts a lot of vids if not say all of them are about Mizu or Mizu and her. There's a video it writes "Wife reveal" on top and under is a clip of Mizu doing the random thing ever, and other are videos she posts about how much she loves Mizu and there are videos of their date. No one knows about this private video of her but some random day when the reader leaves the phone alone with Mizu, she gets bored and just wants to take a peek, the reader gives Mizu the password of her phone anyway and she sees all those videos, and gets all blushy when the reader gets back she being a tease and all, when Mizu ask why the reader leave it private she just said it's not like she doesn't like posting about Mizu, she does have public videos about Mizu and her, but those private clips look cringe and stuff, Mizu laughs at the reader cuteness and after they cuddling and get all lovey-dovey.

The rest is really up to you because I want to see more of Mizu's reaction or sum.

I just wanna share my idea, sorry if this gets long 😭‼️ please feel free to write this at any time if you find it interesting, I use Google Translate so I am sorry if there are grammar mistakes my English is not good 🥹 and remember to take care of yourself first!!💖💖

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

Hey dear!

Thank you so much for all the love /// I'm so happy to receive such kind words. Sometimes I think I'm really bad at writing fanfics since my English isn't that good either and I often find myself comparing my works to others, but messages like these make me turn into goo and I'm so glad that my efforts are able to make you happy.

To those who sent kind messages too, I'm sorry for not replying to them in this manner. I like to go back to them when I feel a bit down about my writing so I want to avoid the hassle of having to scroll through my works ;; All of you really cheer me up I swear <3

How do I even recover from how much I'm melting ///

Please take care of yourself too and I hope that everyone continues to love Mizu too <3

Hope you enjoy! Mwa mwa :*

warning/s: not proofread, she/her for mizu, implied afab reader

note/s: username mentioned is fake

Giggles and the sound of soft conversations filled with laughter and genuine excitement enveloped the small cafe you had decided to go to with your friend as a way to relax before finals started. The two of you had decided to go on a journaling date together and were excitedly taking pictures of your setup.

"But wouldn't it be cuter if we put the coffee here instead?"

"Let's see—oh shit the ice is melting. Could you pass the napkin?"

"Here. Hurry!"

"W-Wait it might drip on the stickers"

After a bit of fuss, a relieved sigh could be heard from the two of you before the soft clink of the coffee cup being placed on the table. The two of you checked how the setup would look under the camera before Akemi flashed you a thumbs up.

With her signal, both of you started taking pictures and videos. Ideas on how you were going to edit the clips were already running through your mind. "Are you going to use a template or no?" you asked, turning to face your friend.

Lowering down her phone, Akemi put a contemplative look on her face before shrugging. "I saw someone do a cute new edit on Tiktok. I want to try it but it might not fit my feed's aesthetic soooo I'm not sure. What do you think?"

"Wait let me see." She opened up the app before tapping on the video to show you. After watching the video, you looked at her with an equally contemplative face. "I think you're better off editing from scratch. It totally doesn't fit your feed."

"Awww damnit," she sighed with a playful smile on her face. You stuck your tongue out at her, scrunching your nose, a smile tugging up your lips at her laughter.

Friendly dates like these were definitely one of your favorite things in the world. It all started during freshman year when you had just moved in town and had absolutely no one to talk to. Luckily, your seat mate was quite the angel and had talked to you first.

At first, you were quite shy, especially considering how your hobby of vlogging and editing things was something you thought was cringe to say out loud. However, to your surprise, Akemi was more than supportive and even helped you in setting up an Instagram account just for your reels. Through her encouragement, you started gaining the courage to try photo editing and your interest in sharing and documenting the events in your life through posting on social media snowballed into an even bigger hobby.

An hour more of chatting and planning your next content, the sound of a motorbike could be heard before the wind chime by the cafe's entrance rang softly. The soft scraping of wood against wood creaked behind you before the sound of someone setting their things down. You didn't need to look back to know that your girlfriend had arrived and just didn't want to interrupt the conversation. Who knows? Maybe she was listening in on it too.

You met Mizu a few years ago in a college party. Akemi had invited you to come since you opened up to her that you were having a difficult time getting to know other people. However, the sweat, the smell of booze mixed with something you could not identify, along with being pushed by the people dancing and moving around was too much for you. Before your friend could drag you along to meet another person, you were already out the door, smoking in the yard.

Meeting someone who had the same idea as you was the least thing you expected to happen, but that's exactly what happened. As you sat down on the garden chair, you heard the soft scraping of another chair pulled beside you. Your eyes scanned the figure, observing their features.

Tall, handsome, quite cold, but at the same time, alluring.

If the night was a person, you were pretty sure they would look like this.

Feeling your gaze, the stranger turned to look at you, making you turn away. However, unable to resist, your eyes glanced at them before going back to pack of cigarettes you had brought only to find out that you had none left. Groaning, you pocketed the empty pack, hand toying with your lighter.

Though the person with you didn't seem to want to talk to you, she suddenly lifted up her own pack for you to get one of her's. You looked at her, taking her nod of approval as a sign to get one. An incredibly awkward silence took both of you as you placed the cigarette between your lips and lit it up.

Taking a deep hit out of it, you cleared your throat slightly before looking up at her. "Seven Stars? I never heard of this brand before," you tried to strike up a conversation, body tense as hell. You internally cursed yourself for even trying to break the ice and possibly making the scene more awkward than it already was.

Immediately, her sharp blue eyes snapped to look at you, burning holes into you, seemingly studying your features. The few seconds that seemed like an eternity to you finally passed and she lit her own cigarette up.

"Yeah, it's from Japan," she replied, blowing a puff of smoke out. Your eyes widen a bit at the sound of her voice. You had expected something a bit deeper, maybe a little less rough? But god, her voice was more attractive than you expected. "I...I see," you replied, instantly regretting how weak you sounded.

Silence and the sound of your exhales were the only sounds of that enveloped both of you. With the newfound attraction you had for this stranger, you mustered up the courage to speak again. "So what brings you here?" you asked, trying to strike up another conversation. She let out a soft grunt as she looked over at you again. "A friend dragged me here."

Her eyes widened as the sound of your laughter reached her ears. Raising an eyebrow, she turned to look at you with a seemingly annoyed expression. "What?" You shook your head at her before taking in another puff. "Sorry, sorry. I just didn't expect us to be in the same situation," you replied, noting how her features softened.

To your surprise, an almost unseen smile ghosted her lips. "A pain, isn't it?" she said, a hint of amusement in her voice. "Oh tell me about. I'm almost scared to drink whatever they mixed in there," you joked. The sound of her laughter warmed your cheeks, the warmth and silk-like smoothness of her chuckles melting you.

"Want to stay here instead?"

"Sure."

After the little exchange, both of you found out that the same friend dragged both of you to the party. Through Akemi's help, the two of you were able to meet more often, exchanging contact information and messaging each other. One thing led to another and soon you found Mizu handing you a bunch of flowers, asking you to be her girlfriend.

Surprisingly enough, despite being extremely introverted and closed off, Mizu was extremely supportive of your hobby. At the start of your relationship, you were very hesitant to ask her for help. Though you wanted to take cute clips of your dates, you'd resort to hiding it from her, taking videos from discrete angles.

But nothing really gets past Mizu's eyes.

She definitely confronted you for it which led to you explaining your hobby and showing her your accounts. As expected, she was a bit skeptical about it at first. But soon enough, she found herself watching your clips, reels, and vlogs on her free time, while she ate, before she slept. Now, she's the one suggesting to go on cute dates for you to film, for you to go out with your friends so you could film cute and trendy dances together, and even hold the camera for you. She even learned all your 'good' angles and learned how to take videos and pictures of you. The surprise on your face when she first insisted that you took photos of your food was priceless.

Out of pure curiosity, she'd sometimes ask if she could see your account using your phone. It was a silly request but you always obliged since you had nothing to hide after all. Her heart would swell with all the traction your posts got. She loved that so many people loved her girlfriend too.

Of course, you dragged her in some of your videos too, making sure that they weren't too awkward for her. Simple matching OOTD fits videos, giving her a short moment in your vlogs, and cute couple trends that weren't too cheesy. You always made sure to ask her for consent to put clips of her in your videos, making them as short or as long as she allowed and only showing the clips she was comfortable with.

Though there were times when your love for her would become overwhelming and you just have the urge to edit cute clips of her. You thought Mizu wouldn't really appreciate so much of herself seen on your public accounts so you secretly made a private account just to dump all those videos in. Videos of her cooking (and sort of failing), during training, and more random clips during your dates. There were some cute ones and some that were definitely heating the place up.

Mizu would never know about this though. You didn't like keeping secrets from your girlfriend, but this one would be your only exception.

The coffee in your cups soon emptied and sticker sheets were exchanged as you and Akemi finished up your little get together. After exchanging your goodbyes and waiting for Akemi's driver to fetch her, Mizu helped you put your helmet on before helping you up her motorbike to go home.

As soon as the two of you got home, you wasted no time telling her everything that happened. From the drinks you ordered to the gossips about Akemi's ex-boyfriend, you did not miss a single detail. And though Mizu appeared uninterested, you could tell by the way her body subtly turned towards you as she cleaned up a bit that she was interested.

After tidying up a bit, the two of you sat in front of the television with you on the carpet with your laptop, editing the clips you took, and Mizu on the sofa watching the new episode of the series she discovered.

Some time later, your girlfriend grew uninterested in the series she was watching and had started taking breaks from it more often, standing up to do random things such as making coffee, bringing you snacks, giving you a random plushie from your shared bedroom.

A small snort left your lips as you watched her refill your coffee for the nth time. "Love...if you're so bored with the show, you can just drop it," you snickered at her, gratefully taking the mug from her and taking a sip. Your lover let out a soft exhale from her nose and rolled her eyes. "I'm not bored," she argued, sitting back down on the sofa. "They're just talking an awful lot."

"Well you need to listen through it if you want to understand their lore." You took another sip of the hot liquid and set the mug down on the coffee table. You could hear her huff from behind you, probably rolling her eyes again. "I don't need to know all this to predict who dies next."

You laugh at her impatience, responding with an eyeroll of your own. Feeling the urge to relieve yourself, you stood up and stretched. "Could you hold on to this for a second? I'll be quick," you said, handing her your phone. She quickly yet carefully took the device in her hand, giving you a small nod before you went to the bathroom.

Mizu sighed and leaned back on the sofa. Though she did deny being bored, she was definitely bored out of her wits. She wanted to see fighting and cool scenes, not a bunch of dialogues. Wasn't action scenes the point of watching action shows?

Unable to take it, she picked up your phone and unlocked it. None of you minded going through each other's phone. It wasn't something the two of you did out of mistrust, but rather, just to check the random things that went through each other's feed out of sheer boredom and curiosity. The difference in content was entertaining, okay?

Tapping on the Tiktok app, Mizu fully expected a plethora of cat videos and celebrity edits to come. However, to her surprise, the account that was open was not one that she was familiar with. Her eyebrows scrunched together in confusion.

wife.dump was the username shown on the profile. Her confusion continued to escalate as she saw the profile picture which was a flower that she recognized as the one she gave you when she asked you to be hers.

Clarity soon took the situation as curiosity got the best of her and she started snooping around the account, looking through the liked videos, then the reposts, and finally the private videos saved in the account. At first, the likes and reposts seemed pretty normal, mostly about cats and how to cook certain foods. But then, as she got to the videos, she realized that it was all...her.

Her making breakfast.

Her making coffee.

Her fixing her motorcycle.

Her, her, and her.

All the videos were edited so cutely too. Admittedly, she wasn't as good as editing as you but she could still definitely see how well these videos were made. From the color grading, sequencing, and even the song choice and timing. Each video with a cute caption talking about what was going on in the video or just plain talking about the things you love about her. She could tell you put a lot of effort into these.

Seriously.

How cute could you be?

Her eyes darted to the bathroom door, checking to see if you were about to go back, then back to your phone. She continued to watch each videos, a dust of pink on her cheeks deepening with each one.

'Wife reveal' and its a video of her doing random things. A clip of her frowning while looking for you, then smiling once she spots you. A clip of her looking a bit nervous as you show the extremely (almost dangerously) red looking chicken wings she cooked. A clip of her keeping a straight face during a round of poker.

She didn't even know some of these clips existed.

Just as she was about to watch the next one, the sound of your strangled whine surprised her. Setting the phone down in one quick motion, her eyes lit up like a deer caught in headlights at the sight of your surprised yet extremely embarrassed face.

"What the hell are you doing?!" you almost screamed, charging towards her and scrambling to get your phone back. Immediately, your lover got up and reached the phone away from you. "Love! Stop it!" you whined at her, feeling your face heat up from sheer embarrassment.

A smirk crept up her lips at your continuous attempt to grab your phone back. The embarrassment and panic continued to bubble through your system as you tried pushing her back down onto the sofa which was definitely a challenge in itself with a girlfriend who took a bachelor's degree in strength building, major in roughhousing, minor in being a rascal.

Several attempts later, the reality of your lover's incredibly strong build sunk in as you tried catching your breath, glaring up at her. Her clear blue eyes, hinted with a bit of mischief, stared back at you before she opened her mouth to speak.

"Wife reveal, huh?" she teased, chuckling as you groaned out loud.

Defeat took over you and you found yourself wrapping your arms around her with your head on her chest. "You're annoying," you huffed at her, words lacking seriousness.

A deep chuckle reverberated from her throat and slowly, she set your phone down to wrap her arms around you as well. "That's no way to talk to your wife," she teased, voice softer than before. You pursed your lips at her and snuggled against her chest. "You better sleep with one eye open, love," you playfully threatened, making her laugh.

You wouldn't admit it but you were relieved that Mizu didn't react badly upon finding out about your secret account.

"With what I've just seen, I hardly think you could do anything harsh especially to me," she teased back, slowly pulling you down onto the sofa with her, guiding you to her lap. "Why did you keep your little secret a secret from me though?"

You looked at her and sighed, blush deepening a bit more. "It's just...you're such a private person and I didn't want to overstep your boundaries," you admitted. "But I couldn't help it, especially when I rewatch the clips I took and you're just...urgh.."

Her hold on you tightened as you snuggled further against her body, warmth running deeper than just physical. "You're just so gorgeous," you finished, sighing deeply. "Every time I see you, it feels like my heart turns into a goopy mess. Even the little things you do is so..so...It's so fucking cute."

The mischievous, teasing smile on her face softened with your explanation. A huge part of her was glad that you found her so damn attractive that you couldn't help yourself and the other part was almost in disbelief. Did you seriously find her that attractive?

Damnit, you're so fucking cute.

Mizu ran her fingers through your hair, letting you rest your head on her shoulder. A bit of silence going on between the two of you before she gently kissed the top of your head reassuringly. "Love, I don't mind," she said with a soft fond smile. "It's quite adorable, actually."

"But aren't you uncomfortable?" you asked, finger tracing down her throat, feeling the soft vibrations as she chuckled. "I could take it down if you feel off about it."

Her heart swelled at how much you cared for her own comfort and for considering her so much. All she could think of was how lucky she was to have such a caring lover. Taking your hand in hers, she placed small kisses against the pads on your fingers, each tender and loving.

"I could never be uncomfortable with something that brings you so much joy."

[blossoms-phan]

will never pass up the opportunity, so! i am asking. what are your phanfic recommendations?

ask (honoured!) and you shall receive bestie! quick preface: i returned to the wonderful world of reading phanfic around the start of this year and have admittedly missed out on years of incredible work i am now catching up on! also in terms of what i read i generally lean towards current-era fics, canon compliant/fluff/smut- although i'm always taking recs from lovely moots/whoever, you may find this isn't the largest range (no aus/long chapter fics or whatever) but this is just a selection of what i've discovered/loved in the past few months and i hope to make more of these as i discover more writings!

shoutout to everyone on here for their recs, all the incredible fanfic writers and the peeps at @phanfictioncatalogue for their work and accessibility and being the reason i discovered so many new fics/tropes i now love <3 ok lets get into ittttttttt

"you look at my face a lot" by natigail: i credit this fic for getting me into reading phanfic again in 2024 <3 one of the first ones i read post-hiatus and i've returned to it countless times! it makes my heart jump, just so sweet and so them. the slittening(s) were such an iconic moment i can't believe it's been 6+ months since them but i love the little moments like dan describing phil's hair colour to a sephora worker, always wanting to know more about each other and the soft intimacy.

"the angel in the marble" by ivylakes: OHH MY GOODNESS this one is artttt. this one is my fave of the post-phlondeing fics i can just see and feel everything that happens, the loving, lazy intimacy, and following this week's t-shirt events it absolutely cements my HC that angel is a nickname for our philly. introspection, hair-kissing, body worship- i eat it up (im having a thing for mirrors in fics rn so there's also that)

"slumber party" by possumdnp: if i wasn't already clear reality-based fics really just do it for me and i love this one!! slumber party is one of my favourite recent-ish gaming vids and i just love the cozy comfort vibes of having a sleepover and getting a little flirty with your best friend/crush going on 15 years <3

"after the birthday stream" by trashcanfromgallifrey: the birthday stream ignited something in all of us but this is just such a perfect depiction of (possible) events after hehe. feels so them, just love the loving intimacy and shower activities and fluffy endings with cake <3 (shoutout hannah ily!!)

"lovers, keep on the road you're on" by possumdnp: another personal fave. japhan 2019 is EVERYTHING to me, this is so lovely and well-researched and i just go in between reading this and watching the stories from it when i want to cry and book a flight to tokyo

"welcome home! (never leave that long again)" by natigail: this one is just soooooo soft and sweet and fluffy. so heartwarming and one of the many wad reunion fics that has my heart <3

ok i'm going to end up including all 40+ of my bookmarks (not a lot. but working on it hehe) if i don't stop myself so as much as i could write paragraphs about all of these just know that my PPA test is positive and i was probably sweating/giggling/kicking my feet at all of these so here's a speedrun list of pure smut (sorry it's a lot of what i read lmao):

"juxtaposition", "slow down", "sensitive", "some kind of mood" and literally everything written by the force that is intoapuddle

"come light me up" by JudeAraya (perhap not pure smut but I loveeee the teasing and characterization in this so so dan ugh)

"appreciation" by Scuddleduck

"a little vitamin D" by Spring_Haze

"good for you, good for you" and "under my thumb" by dvp_95

"lucky" by iihappydaysii

i could keep going but for now i'm going to stop here! i'm sorry if this is messy i have no idea what i'm doing with linking and stuff but i hope this introduces at least one person to a new fic they end up loving! i lurked/read sooo many fics before finally creating an a03 account only a little over a month ago so i def might be missing some i've forgotten to go back and bookmark! shoutout to all of these writers (i could include multiple works from them all u ppl are amazing)- again i'm soo open to discovering more phanfic and want to expand my horizons, i've started to read some chaptered fics i didn't include on here but will reblog more current reads where i can! also if we're moots pls shamelessly promote your works i'd love to check them out! need to start commenting more too but ok ok wrapping it up

[souvenir116]

Hun, I am supposed to be asleep, but, but, hear me out. Pianist Charles and photographer Max? Seems weird, but in my mind, it works somehow.

Like, maybe, Charles had this small performance/gig, and Max just so happened to be there for the night after days of being in an uninspired slump or whatever. And so he feels inspired, takes pictures and stuff, posts them online, the blow up, you know the usual. It ends up benefiting them both. They have this whole "we should work together" and then, after spending so much time together it's like "well I like you a lot but our whole relationship is built on just using each other so would we even work outside of that?"

Don't know if I made any sense lmao 😭 Anyhow, have a great day/night hun 🩶

STOPPP THATS PERFECT!!! Omg I'm in love with the trope of "we are actually madly in love with each other but we act like it's only for pr/ oh we are only friends of course!!"

Max being gone for Charles when he plays the piano, the passion, the serenity his aura carries as he focuses on his songs, long slim fingers, frowning slightly in concentration, and Max just- he's dead on his spot when his eyes find Charles in that huge crowded event, seeing him so effortlessly giving life to melodies, and he's mad gone from that moment.

Also him finding inspiration in Charles after days of being stuck <3 [just say I love you idiot!!]

They are working together because they both want to be good on their careers and rise ☹️☹️ They are making promo vids and Charles sometimes plays piano for Max because Max excuses it as if he wants to buy a small thing and need quick money, so they will shoot a vid, but in fact all he wants to do is watch Charles play love songs to him all night near balcony, as he watches the love of his life composing songs for him with the summer breeze washing over them 🥺🥺🥺 Maybe Charlie needs a strong big man to help him to carry when he finally is able to afford a piano for his house 🥺🥺 he immediately calls Max without a second thought

Maybe Max sometimes gets so distracted by Charles' beauty, instead of piano pics/vids, that his camera roll is full of Charles' dimples from very close up, his pretty green eyes when he looks so fond at Max, and when Max sits on his bed one day to go through the photos he had taken, he sees the pictures Charles took while Max is asleep next to him, as he smiles while laying on Max's chest and smiling like a little baby menace 🥺

Until one of them loses control and gives up on this silly game to kiss the other on the lips!!! then they realize, oh they cant stop 🤭

this is so beautiful just as you love 🥺🥺 you and your magnificent fic ideas, I'm sure it'll be a masterpiece under your pen that you'll do it hella justice ❤️❤️ wishing you a peaceful sleep and kissing the tip of your nose <3

[underlockv]

I recently made a gift for Hocus' birthday and I forgot to post about it here until now! Behold, The Unofficial Unlicensed Talking Magnetic Karl Heisenberg Plush!

More pics and info under the cut!

I've made dolls like this in the past, and had a pattern for it, but this project took me a while. Partially as he was hand sewn (and hand embroidered) and I have a mild hand tremor, partially because I kept adding stuff to him and making him more detailed as I went along (so much so he was late for birthday, sorry Hocus!) but I'm glad Hocus likes him thats the most important part! He wasn't entirely a surprise because I had said I wanted to make him for them, but I think maybe they weren't expecting how overboard I went on the project (nor was I! I just kept having ideas).

I really wanted to be able to make an alternate outfit for Karl based on a fanfic my friend wrote so I made a base doll body and then made Karl's clothes with a bunch of little buttons and snaps. The shirt buttons are decorative (made of sculpey, I couldn't find small enough regular ones) and it has a hook and loop (velcro) tab on the inside. The pants are a combo of this and some snaps. The belt has snaps but technically works like a real belt and then the undershirt also has snaps as do the "boots". His necklace accessories (sculpey, wire, paint) just tie on and off loosely with strings of embroidery thread. The hat has a cardboard/maskingtape base for shape and just an eyeballed-pattern sewn around it (I think it turned out nice!)

(this is prior to me adding his scars in embroidery thread).

The Glasses though are attached with his second feature

I knew I wanted to add some semi powerful magnets to his hands so he could pick up metal objects because that just MAKES SENSE with Karl's powers. I also made him his hammer (paper mache, paint and sculpey again) and added in a magnet to it's handle (as I wasn't working with actual metal for it lol, but I forgot to photograph it before I sent him off) . But in the process of doing that I realized if I attached some magnets on the inside of his head I could also make glasses that snap on and off, and that solved the issue of them staying in place.

Third feature: HE TALKS! Yes, just as advertised on the box if you squeeze him he says a voice line. Just one voice line really, but it's a long one. I'd argue it's probably the most important line he says in the game that really decides his fate with our protagonist (not in his favour, unfortunately). I used a voice recorder for plush toys that allows up to 20 second recordings. one of the unlisted features is there is a zipper on his back so they can take the recorder out for battery replacement, or to rerecord the message if desired.

POV: you're about to go in the hole (I only took a vid for this in the middle stage lmao). The last part of the manual goes over the alternate outfit and then includes a personal message for Hocus I won't show here. The alt outfit, is like I said before, based on a fanfic. But it's actually the unpublished portion of Hocus' long running fic series so its technically SPOILERS. I may post about it later because I actually tea-dyed fabric while making it and it was a more involved process than expected lmao. I hope you enjoyed reading about all the details of this ridiculous project! Oh! btw the box is actually the box the Chris statue came in for the RE8 collector edition. I bought it a few months ago from ebay (found a good deal!), and inspiration struck when I realized I still had it so thats why Karl got an official looking unofficial box lmao. I just cut chris' face off it for the window haha.

[elliespuns]

I was wondering, would you mind introducing yourself a bit? Your age, hobbies (except for blogging of coure), music taste, your favorite movies, etc? I love the content you post and i love you and I don't even know you. I wanna know my favorite blogger.. lol. Only if you're okay with it

First of all, thank you for such a lovely compliment. I love you too and I don't even see your blog, mate!

To answer you; I was answering something similar once. This anon sent me questions and I filled them in, so if you allow me to just copy and paste those so I wouldn't have to type it all again (nothing has changed since then, honestly) then I'll be happy to oblige.

How old are you? I'm 30

Tall or short? Very short, I'm only 5'1 ft, 1,56 m

Sexuality? Eh, I don't like labeling myself but if I HAD TO, it'd say bisexual/demisexual.

Describe yourself briefly I'm an introverted dork that doesn't vibe with most people. I dig music, art, and I love a lot. I either love too much or not at all. I've been vegan for over 10 years now and I love funny people. Other than that, I'm just a very poetic soul that also loves to play video games from time to time and I write. I write a lot.

Something you like about yourself? I'd say it's my knowledge in English. I've been self 'learning' it for 9 years now (never been abroad) and I was able to learn the language to the point where it became a huge part of my life. Like I literally use it more than my mother language. That's a thing I'd say I like about myself.

Favorite hobbies outside your blog? I write; creative writing, poetry. Both fulfil my mind. Then I love reading (ofc). I also draw, play video games, work with graphic programs and I love taking pictures.

Something no one would guess about you I have a very high sex drive, lmao 🫣😂 and people would never say so about me, because I literally look like I have a ribbon buckled to my vagina.

Weird quirks you have Oh, god, I can't stand hand cuts. Like you can literally show me a video of someone having their throat slit and I'll be fine, but then you show me a vid of someone having their palm sliced, or simply just someone cutting their finger and I'll go all asdfghjklsdfghjk.

One talent you wished you had Damn, I wish I could draw from imagination. I can draw but I can't seem to draw anything just by trying to see it in my head. That's so fucking frustrating. And weird. Anyone else having this problem?

A word your friends would use to describe you Idk about one word, but my best friend says I'm the funniest person she has ever met, so does that count? Lol, Idk why she says this. I'm literally a potato.

Craziest thing that's ever happened to you Omg, trauma alert… when my boss (a 70 year old male) caressed the top of my head telling me I'm pretty.

Have you ever been in love? Yes, for over 10 years now (no, it's not a fictional character, lol).

What is your biggest fear? Fuck, it's hurricanes and tornados. I actually have a phobia, it's called 'ancraophobia' and it's a fear of strong wind. (I swear I don't fear normal wind tho, I'm not that weird, actually, ok?).

Why did you start this blog? When I came here one day I realized that there were only a few blogs that were dedicated to the game stuff. So I said why the hell not? I didn't expect to have an actual fanbase here, it's crazy. Love you guys.

Your favorite food? Lentils, that's the shit.

Least favorite food? I'd say meat.

Favorite TV shows? Okay, not gonna mention TLOU cause it's obvious, but the very first show that pops into my mind every time is Breaking Bad. I love this show to bits. Then I also love TWD, OITNB, Better Call Saul, Wentworth, This Is Us, Lost, The Killing.

Favorite movie of all time? My most favorite movie of all time will forever be Ginger Snaps (2000). I've loved this movie ever since I was 11. It's been 19 years ever since and I still love it to pieces. Aaaaah!

Favorite musicians? I love a lot of music, but my most favorite is Damien Rice. I love that guy and what he does. Right behind him are Cigarettes After Sex and Mazzy Star (just pure love). Then it would be Joshua Radin, The Hope Arsenal, Yaeow, The Paper Kites, The Smiths, R.E.M., Blur, BoDeans...

Do you have any pets? My chonky boi guinea pig.

[autisticempathydaemon]

Song I'm fixated on: 1am freestyle by Joji - I like listening to his music to relax and that song is really beautiful and sad. Idk what that says about me

Enneagram: my basic understanding is a six idk this system well

Video essays: not my thing, after about an hour I'm bored even if it's an interesting topic

Imaginary friend: I don't remember any specific ones but I can tell you about my first oc from elementary school which feels basically the same - she was a ninja and a cool older sister who was always traveling for secret missions... and that's about the extent of my memory

Fall asleep: usually I can just fall asleep after imagining the scenarios in my head, but when I really struggle I put in headphones and listen to classic ASMR

Name change: I'm pretty cool with my name but if I had to pick a new name I would probably pick something with deep symbolism. Thing is, I'm terrible at coming up with names so this would take forever

Favorite redacted vid: one of my favorite playlists is Vega, I just let him talk and talk and talk and get so relaxed. If I had to pick a video, questioning a sadistic demon is nice to listen to

No appeal: sorry not sorry.... it's hush. I don't get it.

Movie: frozen, but not of my own free will

Platonic redacted boy: Asher is cool, just not really my type. He's goofy asf so I think we could be friends

Sleepy ramble: I don't think I ramble when I'm tired...? To give you something when I'm drunk I ramble about how much I love my friends though

Gas station: I want either a mango arizona, the tropical citrus vitamin water, or a liquid death and chips

Favorite playlist: I have a chill/jazz/lofi playlist I've been playing a lot at work lately, easy listening type stuff

Guilty pleasure media: am I allowed to say redacted? If not, I secretly watch those dumb reality shows about rich people to make myself laugh

Hmmm… Something about you makes me want to put you in the DAMNily. I think you’d make good friends and integrate with them really well as Damien’s partner.

Type Sixes are characterized as being responsible, trustworthy, and loyal, aiming for security and support in their lives to aid them in achieving their dreams. Damien, and the family that you’d become a part of by being with him, would more than give you that. I also like the chill vibes you and your music choices give off, which I think would be a good counterbalance to Damien’s more driven temperament.

The two of you would have such a lovely life together built on trust, cooperation, and support. I could see the two of you quietly working side by side, sharing your playlist with Damien. I can see the whole group stopping by 7/11 for snacks at Damien’s behest and you two being the only ones that got any water. (He also strikes me as a Liquid Death fan.) I can see all y’all going out for drinks and Damien pretending to be done with the way you fawn over him and your friends but actually thinking it so charming and heart-warming.

Song:

We can talk here on the floor/ On the phone, if you prefer/ I'll be here until you're okay/ Let your words release your pain/ You and I will share the weight/ Growing stronger day by day/ It's so dark outside tonight/ Build a fire warm and bright/ And the wind, it howls and bites/ Bite it back with all your might

I like this song for y’all for two reasons. One, a song about trust and vulnerability, about only having to be the truest version of oneself fits Damien and any partner of his really well. Two, the soft, melodic cadence of Cavetown might appeal to you and be good for working!

Runner-ups:

In the same vein of you fitting in with the DAMNily, I think you and Huxley could be a good pair; he’d also be a good match for a Type Six. Outside of that vein, Aaron and you would be cute, because y’all would have the same taste in fun, comfort tv.

note: thank you for waiting 💕

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[tunabesimpin]

🐟 Welcome to Tuna's Lair! 🐟

Tuna's the name art is my game! I just be simpin! I mostly create content for Twisted Wonderland here! But I’m happy to do stuff related to all of these: [ Twisted Wonderland, Splatoon, Genshin Impact, ProSekai, Uma Musume, Obey Me ]

Please check if requests are open in the below section before you send in anything.

This blog may reblog content better suited for mature audiences! sensitive topics, dark themes, etc. as well as posts with heavy spoilers. PLEASE TAKE CAUTION WITH THIS IN MIND!

Requests

Check here before sending in requests! I will try to respond to all requests, but if you send an ask for something that has closed you're going to be disappointed. On that note if you requested before a deadline and haven't received a response please be patient. I make sure to remember all I have left so I promise I will get to you ^v^

Rules:

-request are mainly for OC interactions or canon characters unless there is an event -these will be sketches only; no color except very minimal shading or monotone (depends on my irl workload) -Writings and questions will usually be responded with rambling or a bulleted style -I do not take nsfw requests -If you would prefer a private response be sure to let me know in your ask -If you are wondering where your ask went, feel free to ask again or msg me! -Be polite or I will not do your request and may block/ ignore you -Mutuals you can send in anything at anytime ily :3

Questions/ Interactions/ Writings - [ OPEN] Art Requests - [ CLOSED ] Special Event Requests - [ CLOSED ]

Profiles/ Series/ Comics/ Writings Collection

OCs:

Tuna! | Profile | Relationship chart | TWST Style Model | tag #twst tuna |

Mitchell! | Profile | Relationship chart | tag #twst mitchell |

Series/ Vids/ Events:

TWST OC Hunger Games! - Twst OCs thrown into hunger games! Tunas Sea-Side Side Quest! - 800+ Follows Summer-time event Top Ten Gooby Woobies - Meme Video

Writings/ Comics:

Fishy Beginnings - Tuna backstory/ UM backstory Floyd Has Discovered Something Interesting - Tuna x Floyd comic Slumby Party with Lilia & Tuna - Anxiety vent

Tags

Tuna OC/Sona - #twst tuna Answers/ replies/ rambles/ general posts - #tuna be talkin Writings - #tuna be writin Summer Fanevent - #TunasSeaSideSQ

Introduction

For those who don't know me!!! Welcome to my (mostly twst) simp page! My name is Tuna! I'm 23, ace and nonbinary. You can use any pronouns for me, however I most prefer They/Them! I have severe anxiety and ADHD so I hope you will be patient with me and let me know if I become too chatty or overstep lines! My hobbies include creating art, listening to music, playing games and sometimes streaming. (If you'd like to check out my streams go here -> Parsnops WARNING MATURE CONTENT!) I'm not the best at interacting with others due to my anxiety, but I enjoy talking whether it be with close friends or shoving my ideas into the void of tumblr. I love simping for art, writings, music and all sorts of different medias! I love to hear/ see/ read and learn about everything yall make! I usually do art in my free time, but sometimes I like to play silly horror survival games, farm sims, and rhythm games. I've been doing art for around 7 - 8 years. I hope one day to work off my art, but I don't expect that anytime soon.

Anyways here are my favs from different medias! TWST - Floyd, Jade, Azul, Rook Lilia, Kalim, Ruggie Splatoon - Pearl, Marina, Frye, Callie Genshin - Klee (main #1), Alhaitham (Main #2), Tighnari, Fischel Prosekai - all of Wonderland X Showtime, Kanade, & Shiho Uma Musume - Gold Ship, Special Week, Silence Suzuka, Twin Turbo Obey Me - Beelzebub & Barbatos UtaPri - Natsuki Shinomiya

Games I like to play! TWST, Obey Me, ProSekai, Bang Dream, Splatoon 3, Phasmophobia, Fallout New Vegas, Devour, Minecraft, Sonic Adventure 1 & 2

Anyways thanks for getting to know me! One warning! Please do not ask insensitive questions or try to leave hate/ be extremely rude. I'm just going to block you as I really don't have time or the mentality for it. Its very hard to get on my bad side, but once you are, there's no coming back ok? I'm just trying to have fun here ^v^!

[kuwdora]

Dead of Night Vid WIP - Timeline Progress

Over the weekend I managed to get into a nice vidding groove. It also helps that I'm really only working with 2 or so episodes for this whole vid (with a smattering of clips featuring Aretuza's adepts). This was also the type of vid that's been sitting in the corner of my brain for the past 11 months so it was pretty well formed when I started teasing it out. Thanedd Intrigue! Yennefer's face!! Fighting and more intrigue and did I mention Yennefer's face? And her pain and love?? I love. I love. The last quarter of the vid really came together better than I imagined and is my favorite part of the whole vid. Lots of fighting and dancing choreography on the beat. It's really fuckin' visually sweet.

And if you squint at the screencap, you can also see that I extended the audio by about 15 seconds at the end of the track. I found myself wanting to include a little more about Yennefer and Tissaia rather than just focusing on the Yenralt of It All because Tissaia was so fucking important to Yennefer. It's also turning into a motif for me since I made sure to include Tissaia and Geralt's relationship as equal importance in my season 1 Yennefer vid Gasoline. I wasn't really happy with a bunch of clips I laid in the middle section but that was mostly me trying to figure out how to balance various intrigue elements: Philippa and Dijkstra, Triss and Istredd. At one point I had a too much Geralt and Vilgefortz taking over the middle part and ended up yanking out a bunch of stuff and made sure to put Philipa and Yen in there. The vid is much better for it. I can always make another Geralt/Vilgefortz vid later if the brain still wants to gnaw on that. I let the vid draft sit for a day or two to let my brain cool down. Then I tackled it again in the evening. The blank space in the screencap below was mostly the Thanedd battle scene stuff which I mostly wanted to skim over since that was more Action than Intrigue.

I have a lot of favorite lyric associations in this vid, but among my favorite is the lyric "you can shout, you can scream" - and on the scream lyric, I put a shot of Lydia doing her quiet lurking thing. It makes me very very pleased, eeheee. It's the sort of thing that people who know the show will get, but casual vidwatchers and non-witcher friends wouldn't immediately grasp since they probably don't know that Lydia's jaw was burned away by the Elder Blood huffing she did in season 2. There's a shot of Lydia with her face revealed later in the vid. But it might be hard to connect the random appearance of this character to those who aren't familiar with the show and events of the episodes so I wasn't going to assume many people would see it. But here I am talking about that clip because it makes me happy. Another unplanned vidding thing that's very satisfying.

I did finish the vid last night!! So no more sneak peeks, I'm gonna post the vid tomorrow!

Yennefer!!! Dancing and intrigue with the beat!!

ICYMI: Naked Vid Draft - Dead of Night (Yennefer/Yenralt/Thanedd) - The Witcher Netflix

Process video of laying down the first clips

First minute of the vid + timeline view

[passthroughtime]

have been tagged in several tag game posts, so gonna just pile them all up here

tagged here by @woundedheartwithin

picrew + the last song you listened to

2. tagged here by @sunlightfeeling

Name: yeah, no

Pronouns: she/her

Star Sign: libra

# of Siblings/Fun Facts About Them (If Any): one sister. she's 10 years younger than me. she is very considerate and devoted to her friends and always makes sure their birthdays are unforgettable. one time she printed out a photo of jimin on lots and lots of A4 paper and made a cardboard cutout of him as a present for her friend. i'm pretty sure it turned out taller than the original lol

# of Pets & Their Names: one cat, his name is peach

Fandoms: judgment. though lots and lots lie dormant, and i don't know if i give off that impression, but i am actually interested in lots of other stuff right now.

but mainly judgment, yeah

Favorite Color: red

Favorite Song: is there anyone who knows an answer to this question?

ok, here's one of my fav Raging Depressive Episode songs from nin with a special flavour of depersonalization

Favorite Author (of anything readable - books, fanfics, zines, webtoons, whatever!): this is a tough one, it's been years since i last could answer this question. i'll put here furudate haruichi, even though i've read only one work. but it did leave me with the impact which can't be overestimated. literally changed my life

Favorite Fic Type: canon compliant & canon divergence. not aus, in short. other than that, i'll read anything

Favorite Holiday: maslenitsa and easter (eastern orthodox church edition)

Do you have a partner (romantic, qpr, anything!)?: no

Hobbies: writing and playing video games mainly. fond of gif/pic/vid editing, merch collecting, solving puzzles, watching letsplays & streamers, watching serialized types of media, learning what i can do with my computer until i break it in half, and generally just Finding Out New Stuff

Fun Facts About You: i'm a straight-As student who never got a higher education. i was (and still am) pretty smart, and actually got into uni without much problem, but very soon dropped out because of my mental health. it's been 9 years since i've graduated high school, and it's still taxing to even consider furthering my education

3. @bother-blame send me:

not gonna ask what "actually listen to" opposes to, but instead take it as an opportunity to put here songs which yeah, i do listen to, regularly and unironically. i love these below dearly, in fact.

careless whisper, george michael

prelude in c-sharp minor, op.3, no.2, sergei vasilyevich rachmaninov

24-hour cinderella, ugaki hidenari

friends never say goodbye, elton john

one-winged angel, uematsu nobuo

[chrimsone]

Hallo! I keep forgetting to link my fics n tumblr but I didn't forget this time!

So fun stuff, I used a clip of my own Crucible match for this chapter. And that clip resulted in a mercy after four minutes! Omg it's crazy how much is happening in such a short amount of time. I promised a friend I'd like show my process for this chapter and I am using this post as an excuse to the process lol.

So first I needed a source video of course. And I couldn't really just take some match off the internet cause I did want to be specific with what I had equipped. I knew I gave Rin an Arc Logic earlier so I had to grab myself an acceptable copy of one. But the Scout of hers isn't based off any in-game one tbh. But I have a massive love for Perseus-D so I decided to just use that as an acceptable replacement. Since Rin is mostly based off how I play the game normally, I ran the usual gear I wear. Wasn't gonna be a problem if knife hands got used at all in the match. After that, I just had to hope I queued into either the Jav-4 or Convergence map. Those two are my favorites and that's where I wanted her first match to be! Happened to be Jav-4 first.

The fun part was trying to adapt this without the Strand stuff lol. Since at the point of my story not even Stasis has been discovered. Anyways after getting the video then I kinda write out what I experienced on some sheets of paper. Think of it as a rough draft. The starting of me translating what I experience into text form.

From there I take that and then put a City Children lens on it. This goes into an actual doc and since this can be more detailed as I give myself notes and ideas for actual writing. Here's a snapshot of that cause it does take a few pages worth of text.

After this I start actually writing the chapter. While that happens I do cross out the text on the second draft doc. Just helps my eyes from glazing over as I look over all the funny words. Honestly doing all this helped me actually realize some of the callout names for Jav-4! Since the radar provides a name for an area, and to keep my mental map proper I ended up figuring out a decent chunk of the names! Who knows I might actually use them when playing lol.

Pretty much any chapter that focuses on the action has this kinda process to it. The Sundial went thru it! Tho since I didn't have a good PC back in Dawn, I never saved a video of one of those runs. Esoterickk is a true god I used one of his videos on it for reference. Which was still kind of fun! Had to interpret someone else's perspective.

Uh, I guess that's it for this chapter! The process details ended up taking a lot more time to write down than expected lol. If I'm lucky the next chapter won't be 7k words and get out a little quicker. It's not combat focused this time so I don't really need to go thru this process! Though. I have has to use another Esoterickk vid on the Corridors of Time as my memory is fuzzy. Fun hint-hint on what the next chapter is about hehe

[ageless-aislynn]

Okay, so this just feels not very fair. I was finishing up my N7 Day Andromeda vid and just needed to capture a couple more scenes. But even though the recording seemed to start as usual, there was just nothing there when it was done. Then I realized that the Game Bar itself wouldn't actually even load. None of the fixes for that have, you know, fixed it. (The Game Bar was working as of Nov 2 because that's the last day I have any captures recorded.)

Digging around, I discovered that my computer is throwing errors left and right but just managing to correct from them and not crashing. Rather, not crashing yet. Clearly something is STILL wrong, despite having acted normal in the month since it was Blue Screening like mad before I reinstalled Windows.

But. Here's the kicker. My dad's computer started Blue Screening right after I got mine working again. The difference, though, is that it's very difficult to get his to restart. If I can get it to come on once more, I'm going to try to completely reinstall its Windows but I don't honestly know if it's going to be able to or not. This thing is pretty fried and, of course, is *just* past its warranty. 😣

I was already assuming we're going to have to replace his computer but now mine, which is much older, is starting to circle the ol' drain. He told me tonight to focus on replacing mine and not to worry about his. He's been able to pretty much do the stuff he likes to do on the computer via our tv's Fire Stick so he said he's not missing out on anything. But still. I'll feel awful if he gets bumped back because of me since he's already not had a reliable computer for the past 3 weeks.

That said, in my 20 some years of having computers, I've never before had BOTH of them in danger of being bricked at the same time. This just sucks so much! I just want to be able to make my silly little videos and to try to get my WIPs done with NaNo. I was actually doing pretty good juggling both up until now.

Ah well. I'm just venting, sorry. I may be gone again, depending on how things go. However, I did schedule my Andromeda video to post on Youtube on November 7 whether I'm able to get here or not. Will post it here and on my AO3 when I can. Even though it's not completely the vision I had for it, I still like how it turned out. Surprisingly, it's not a shipper vid this time. And probably nobody thought I could MAKE a character study that didn't have even a hint of shippiness, right? 🤷‍♀️😉

*sigh* I'm trying not to let this get me down but dang if I'm not just tired of pretending I have any idea how to fix all of these issues. I can't find any place decent to take them for repairs that doesn't want a ton of money just to reinstall Windows and since I can do that, I don't want to pay somebody else for something I can do for free, you know? But I'm getting to the point where I think they've either got some sort of hardware issues that just reinstalling can't fix or I'm just borking up the reinstall somehow. I don't know. I'm so, so, so tired of it.

Love you, friends. Hope you're doing well and that I'll see you again soon. 💖

[henswilsons]

I won't deny that Buddie is one of my favourite relationships (even just platonically, shipping aside, their relationship with each other and with Chris is so beautifully written), but I'm also really happy to get more firefam interactions, especially in combos we haven't really seen much of in previous seasons.

I think honestly the one that got me the most, is Eddie's interaction with Bathena in 6.07(iirc), where he's telling them about the con artist who scammed his Abuela and why he's so sceptical of the paranormal. Like we have SO MANY of those scenes with Buck in Eddie's place, turning to Bobby and Athena, so the fact that Eddie did the same is kind of heart-meltingly precious imho.

Truthfully I do have sort of mixed feelings about the way Buddie exists so far this season (although I think a lot of that is cynicism borne from spending way too long in fandoms that have done the same thing with their borderline co-dependent m/m "best friends" trope) but I'm not going to say we shouldn't be getting other firefam stuff. I mean the show is about the team, not just about Buddie.

(Sorry for the super long message, love your blog, I have a lot of feelings about this show whoops)

omg no please do not apologise for this message!! you have pretty much described exactly how i feel too!!!

my favourite thing about this show is the found family of it all, it's the reason why i started watching (911 would occasionally pop onto my dash and then i got curious and nosed around a few vids on youtube and the one that got me properly watching was eddie's introduction scene but the part where the squad r chatting about the hot firefighter calendar). i also love above everything that the found family feels earned--like that's kinda my gripe about lone star, is that i think they saw the positive audience reaction to the found family in 911 and tried to replicate it with an immediate bond between the team, but what makes it so meaningful (at least in my opinion) on 911 is that you see the progression of it and how hard they work to get there. like even just look at hen/bobby's progression through the seasons!!! hen telling athena in s1 that she's still not sure about bobby as a captain to a couple of episodes ago where bobby told her "i love you" like!!! i want to weep!!!

(and the point you brought up about eddie going to bobby and athena's -- exactly!!!!! exactly!!!!!!!!!! @djdangerlove has a beautiful post about this season being eddie's re-immersion into the 118 and the reaffirmation of his place in its family that pretty much perfectly sums up my feelings)

and of course i'm as big a buddie slut as the next gal, and of course i would be more than happy with a 45-min episode of just them making dinner. i'd also be lying if i said i don't understand the disappointment of some buddie shippers when an episode goes by and the buddie interaction is like 1 glance and that's it. of course i get it! ive written over 100k+ of them falling in love of various ways. but i think it discredits the richness and complexity and warmth of the show to dismiss every other scene. it's an ensemble show about a diverse group of people from different backgrounds who are all striving to be good.

you're allowed to be disappointed about the lack of buddie scenes and also love every hen or carla or bathena or madney scene we get in its place. it's not mutually exclusive! and if you can't separate that then maybe take a step back from the show, and if you figure out you are ultimately only interested in buddie then there is plenty of excellent fic out there to consume! watch the season in 1 go once it's finished airing and skip every other scene! but don't make yourself unhappy by live-watching something you don't enjoy and certainly certainly certainly don't make others unhappy by dampening on their joy.

anyway sorry thats my rant over sgfhdhfh

[self-loving-vampire]

Vent anon here! Thank you, and you may publish this ask if you want, I don't mind

Birth giver accused me of having 'emotional clinging disorder' or whatever bc I told her that the fact I'm like 90% sure I don't feel guilt and that the only things I feel are GOOD, BAD and FEAR after starting the argument bc her [50-60~ yr old] friends were """literally shaking""" after I walked away from them at a party. The same woman who doesn't understand why I don't eat anything she makes anymore after seeing her lack of concern at leaving food on the literal floor and the fact there's dried food on anything she washes like all she did was make the damned dish look at a bottle of dish soap and she leaves moldy limes in the bathroom and watches those fake medicine vids on YouTube and said that onions can absorb viruses from the air despite WORKING FOR THE NHS

Not to mention how she forces me to be religious, and once fucking interrogated me for having a blue ribbon bc """it's a boys colour""" and she's stolen my money on my and my siblings' birthdays before, and takes my shit and waits months before giving it back and once she promised to take me to a councillor like I had asked and she took me to some back alley religious place where some guy spat water on me for 30 mins and never goes shopping and gets mad when I don't share my cooking with her and uses all my stuff and shouts and hits me so now I have a fear of asking for help from anyone. Plus how she's always made fun of my fears despite the fact I can't control them, nevers answers a single fucking question I ask her and goes through my letters and I'm tired. I'm so tired, she acts like this and wonders why her children ditch her at their first chance.

Thanks for listening to my ranting, I wish you a good day and I will return to my eternal emotion of Tired + either being Bored or Entertained

It can be really shocking when people who are supposed to know certain extremely basic things as part of their job or alleged education seem to believe complete nonsense some quack sold them on instead.

I hope you can ditch her as well soon. None of this is okay and she seems to entirely lack self-awareness about her "parenting". This really does seem like the kind of person who ends up bitterly posting on estranged parent forums.

The good news is that I can say from experience that your life becomes better instantly once you cut contact with people like this and then continues improving as time passes and you slowly fix whatever damage they may have inflicted to your brain. Having supportive friends who accept you helps a lot.

[kazooie]

I've wanted to do YouTube for like.. idk over a decade now, but I get so hung up on things like what if I post one video, and some people like it, but the next video is completely different in format and tone so they don't like it, but, maybe it'd be easier to just make pilot episodes for each kind of video I wanna make and just post them all on the same day, so people know from the start that it's a variety channel..

Getting started is always the scary part, but this gives me some time to sit with what I've made while working on the next thing, idk, we'll see, I hope I can do it, mental illness makes it hard, physical disabilities make it harder, but I want to create so so so bad, I want the ideas in my head to be on the screen already.

I wanna do some fursuit videos, not necessarily to talk about just furry stuff(though there will be that), but also just to talk about cute happy fun stuff, Sprinkles is adorable and a bit sassy and I think people would enjoy videos of her.

I also wanna just try commentary videos and while idk if that's something I'll find fulfilling, I do think it would be good practice.

I definitely wanna put some original works on there too, but those will definitely take longer and I gotta get good at video editing first.

I alsooo might need help with the filming side with fursuit vids, my mum can help out a bit atleast, I could also just ask a friend to make sure I'm in focus lol, can't see shit in suit.

[bright-and-burning]

To counterpoint your post about liking posts - I often like stuff because I'm not in a place where I can read/watch and want to save for later

Eg I check Tumblr a lot in the bathroom at work lol so can't dig into a fic or watch a vid really lol - but then it takes me a few days to actually get around to going through my likes

Anyway love your stuff, don't mean this in a combative way, just this might be the same for other people too

no that’s valid and i understand that! i save a lot of things to my drafts to see later when im not at work lol. i’m not like. That Upset abt it, and i would say w fic posts i don’t care half as much (partially bc fic is discoverable in other ways (via ao3) and the other stuff i post is just not?) but it is generally frustrating when the like to reblog ratio is horrifically skewed on the other stuff like. i don’t think a hundred plus people are saving it for later a week on or whatever u kno? it sounds very attention whore of me to be like well i want people to see it lol but i don’t make things in a vacuum! i do it bc im haunted by the visions without reprieve until i execute yes but also bc i want other people to be haunted by the visions so we can all shout abt the visions together 😭 but yeah i do try to shout at my silly sad hindbrain that just bc a friend liked a thing i made and didn’t reblog it doesn’t mean they didn’t like it that much. but sometimes i am sad anyways

i did make that post abt 75% bc that image of like absent parent but it’s faceless tumblr users tickled me tho, it was meant slightly in jest not in like Strong Criticism

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary280

6/23-24/24

sunday - monday

we have to go out to a friend's birthday tomorrow so i am doing an all nighter.

it's going. well or bad, idk, i'll see how i feel tomorrow i guess, i feel crazy and loopy right now though.

i did some more work on the cover art, got the text sorted i think, which is really fun, and i got a new gimp plugin to make text along path go way smoother and that makes me very happy, it makes it a lot more fun to work w/ so i'll probably fool with that more. i also got a new font, the one used in this:

#swawg

i also wrote another song today, it's just fun to write stuff. i need to write words! i actually need to get some stuff together for publication soon, almost forgot about that, can't forget about that. the only thing holding that back is i need to get a bio written and i feel like it needs to be like, kind of professional or like, not professional, just not so casual i guess. idk. i guess what do i actually think people need to know about me? like, nothing, i want to be nothing, just words on the page. maybe i should just take the one i used in ergot again? i might as well try honestly. 'nothing in particular,' is accurate. there's no detail worth transmitting really. i guess it's bizarre to do that while writing a diary. it's really just that there's a gulf, or not a gulf, but it feels like a gulf, it's a strange geology in my life, there's nothing here other than everything here, it feels like a lie to not talk about the everything, so if i can't, i must admit that there's nothing else other than the activity of living, that's all i care about anyway, or it's what i feel tethered to, all warmth is from the friction of that.

it's just weird. nothing in particular is all that feels applicable.

ok, i need to just sleep, it's 8 pm now and i can hardly keep my eyes open or think straight, i'm like, getting weird visions. i guess i hope i have interesting dreams come out of this or something.

i just watched this video by frog power where he ranks all his albums and talks about them a bit, but he privated the vid. i really liked it though, i was gonna post it here. it's funny how he talks about his music sucking, or thinking it sucks, what i've heard doesn't, and one album he says is average i think is really special. he is a truly strange man.

one thing, is not sleeping makes me feel super super super ugly. hopefully sleeping now won't make me wake up too early or i can just go back to sleep. wwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. i did want to do more on the cover rn kinda but i don't think it'd really be wise to start trying to do a figure drawing rn tbh. that might drive me insane.

so

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!