#iain was phenomenal these last episodes

[theromanticrationalist]

Young Sheldon Series Finale: 7x13 Funeral

So, I was delayed in watching the finale because I actually wanted to watch it with my own Dad, but AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

😭

Damn, damn, damn, DAMN DAAAAAAAAMN!! So, that Funeral episode hit and it hit hard. (Did they really HAVE TO HAVE AN OPEN CASKET FOR THE LOVE OF GOD...ughughughughugh) The writing for that episode was the crème de la crème, and I think is the cathartic thematic climax of this series. The final episode was necessary for transitioning between YS and TBBT, which brings both stories together, but as far as the story YS was telling, Funeral was the show's end. It isn't a perfect ending and it wasn't a pretty ending, and in fact is quite devastating in so many ways, but it is truthful to Sheldon's journey, and to the human experience.

When Sheldon got up in front of the church to say a few words, playing out the scenario as he wished he had done it, that was the moment. The whole episode is Sheldon processing his grief - imperfect and messy as he has literally no tools or precedent to fall back on - as he replays his father leaving that fateful day over and over, tweaking it each time to make it "better". With a young man with an eidetic memory and a compulsive need for his reality to be orderly (and the fact that he believes in the Many-Worlds Interpretation), this would make sense. He begins be utilizing Star Trek (Spock's death) to filter it and provide context, but that no longer proves sufficient to the crushing and terrible emotions of what he is experiencing. That was a tool he used for when he was a boy, but now he has been thrust into the world of manhood in absolutely the worst way possible. What is it that will speak truest to what he is going through than the bare naked truth?

"I've been thinking a lot about the last moments I had with my Dad. It was morning and he was leaving for work. He said "See y'all later." And I said nothing. I regret that. I could have said bye. Or asked him for a ride. Or told him that I loved him, but I didn't. I barely noticed that he left. So many times that I didn't notice my father, I hope he knew how much I loved him."

From the audience's perspective we have been watching Sheldon play the scenario many times through his mind, and to have the rug pulled out from under us at this moment of all moments, to see that this too was only just a scenario (played out by Sheldon Prime), is exactly what it is like living in this world, enduring this life - not just for Sheldon but for all of us. In one of my previous posts I mentioned how I loved Sheldon Cooper's story because of what he could teach us. This episode encapsulates it in total. He can teach us that you cannot quantify life, you can't organize it so that everything makes sense and plays out in a well-structured narrative and format, where every feeling is named and every event categorized. Life is myriad, so much richer and so much fuller and so much wilder than anything we can imagine or think up on our own. It is what makes it utterly terrifying and wretched, but it is also part of its beauty and purpose. Sheldon Cooper comes to realize this, but he is only able to have this deeper understanding after first living it. Sheldon Prime's concluding narration at the end of Funeral is Sheldon Cooper's story taken as a whole - past, present, future - the life in movement. Of course young Sheldon would not experience his father's death in its completeness. He is the midst of it. He is trying to survive it. So I love the realness of Sheldon's "imperfect" response to his father's death in the fact that he didn't respond to it. He quite literally did not process it, and instead ran away from it. It is painful, brutal, but truthful. Yet that was not the end of Sheldon Cooper's story, as we know, and I think that leaves us with hope, but it is a kind of hope that must be waited for with profound patience.

Although I myself have not gone through the loss of a parent like Sheldon has, I still have gone through devastating and traumatic life events, so I am very familiar with the inexplicable and violating nature of grief and loss. I am still processing that grief and loss, so these thoughts I am sharing with you all right now are pretty recent revelations, and quite literally me living them out in real time, so it might be a little messy...hehe.

However, I will end this by saying that none of these truths mean that life is arbitrary. It doesn't mean it makes life meaningless. Just because human endeavors cannot place life within a context that he himself can first create and then comprehend, doesn't mean that life doesn't have a context and that that context can't be understood. It just means that that context comes from a different Source, an external and eternal one (and I will say, by necessity, a paternal one, but that is a thought for another day!)

Fitting then that the episode, and Young Sheldon, should end with the recitation of the Lord's prayer:

“Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven." | Matthew 6:9-10

[rudikawhy]

Even at the risk repeating myself, I have to talk about Iain De Caestecker's phenomenal acting.

Coming straight from S05 E14, that's the episode I want to talk about. Because even though I absolutely HATE the Doctor, I still am amazed by him/Iain. The Doctor and Fitz are two different characters, but at the same time the same. They practically look the same (aside from clothings), but we can still them apart. The moment that "Fitz" took off the welding mask, I exclaimed "Oh, please don't!", because just because of his facial expression I knew it was the Doctor.

Iain plays the Doctor so differently, so repulsively, that I am too impressed by Iain that I don't really have time to hate the Doctor anymore. In this episode, having the Doctor and Fitz opposite each other, was... something. It was really painful to watch Fitz seeing the Doctor for the first time since the Framework, I felt so sorry for him, but I also felt my heart breaking. Not as much, though, as later when 1. The Doctor was mimicking Fitz's stuttering, 2. Fitz realises that he IS the Doctor, that he has done all those things, and 3. Daisy says she won't forgive him.

It was a really good, but also really tough episode, and I'm not sure wheather I can watch the whole episode more than once.

I can say for sure, though, that I can watch the second to last scene multiple times. Deke telling Jemma he's their grandson. That she and Fitz will be alright. How his mother has always talked about Fitz. The tears in Jemma's, but especially Deke's eyes. It's all really beautiful.

[fitzsimmonsdaughter]

Well, I just watched the season 5 finale and to say I am an inconsolable mess right now would be an understatement.

I knew it was coming but Fitz's death absolutely destroyed me. I've seen edits and the second he, Mack and May ran into that building I realised what was going to happen. So I was already crying long before the roof collapsed.

The moment Mack realised was pure pain. One of the last one on one conversations they had was Mack basically telling Fitz he was becoming a bad person. But remembering them when they first met and everything they have been through since... PAIN. As one of the bus kids, May is his mother, so having her there was equally as heartbreaking. They've never been really close but they have been with each other through so much and after both being Hydra in the framework, I like to think they bonded a little more.

It was the most devastating scene I have ever witnessed but all I can think is thank goodness Jemma wasn't there because if she was I would not stop crying for weeks. Or Daisy because imagine the emotions after everything that has happened this season.

I think we also need to take a second to appreciate Iain's phenomenal acting. In this show he has proved time and time again just what an incredible and compelling actor he is and I think the authenticity of this scene really made it. Every tear, every crack in his voice, every gasp for breath was deliberate and a sign of pure talent and skill that is simply unmatched. The way he delivered each line and how he portrayed each emotion was so raw, so real- it was breathtaking to watch.

Anyway I know they are off to retrieve frozen space Fitz but it was still the most heart shattering thing I have ever seen (even surpassing the scene where he screamed at the monolith which I think is one of the best acting performances in the history of television). Also, who is going to be having the 'you cut into Daisy's brain in your Doctor persona' conversation with him because HOW do you tell someone that. AND he won't know he married Jemma. Or about Deke.

All in all, one of my favourite episodes of the show and definitely one of the saddest (I haven't even had time to think about Coulson's goodbye). They better get him back quickly in season 6 because he is my comfort character and I heavily rely on him :D

[consoledacup]

AoS Episode Showdown -- FZZT

This episode is so damn good I was almost late to work because I wanted to keep watching. Even though I’ve seen it at least 10 times. There’s a lot to say.

In this episode, 1x06, Skye says that FitzSimmons is psychically linked. Fitz scoffs at that and then looks on horrified as Simmons does a Ward impression almost exactly like his. In 2x06, that psychic link is completely subverted. Any sort of attempt Simmons gives to finish Fitz’s train of thought is immediately squashed by him. In 5x06, the psychic link is well intact when they both propose to each other at the first opportunity. And then, of course, 6x06 literally has Fitz and Simmons psychically linked. 

Fitz tells Skye she “made the rounds” and apologized to all of them. I love the idea of her going up to May, Ward, Fitz, and Simmons individually and apologizing to each of them. Although, my guess is FitzSimmons is in the same room when she approaches them.

FitzSimmons both imitate Ward with their hands on their hips. When the team arrives on the campsite, Ward has his hands on his hips. 

When Coulson, Ward, and Skye are talking about Adam Cross, Ward says that “everyone looks clean on their first go-round.” While, yes, this is a clear foreshadow about Ward, this also applies to the show as a whole. Up until 1x17, the team and the audience were both lulled into a sense of trusting that everyone had good intentions. Over the years, both the team and the audience have learned to trust. no. one. I love it.

In 1x06, Simmons tells Fitz that as a scientist she “has to dissect something.” In 6x06, Id Jemma literally cuts into Fitz, claiming, “I like dissection.”

In 1x06, FitzSimmons has the dynamic of a bickering married couple. In 2x06, Hunter and Bobbi take on that persona, while Fitz and Simmons maintain a dynamic far less friendly. In 5x06, Fitz and Jemma have a brief married couple spat involving who proposed first at the very end of the episode. In 6x06, they are literally a bickering married couple. 

Tony Diaz’s death is heartbreaking. His realization when he repeats his friends’ names and thinks about what happened to them... 

In 1x06, when Tony asks Coulson about what death was like for him, Coulson says, “It’s beautiful.” In 6x06, when Jemma is pleading with Fitz, she says that there was “a lot of death, yes, but there was beauty too.” I just really like that word used when coupled with death.

When May tells Coulson he did everything he could for the fireman, Coulson gives a little nod that breaks my heart. He’d like to believe that she’s right, but he knows he could’ve done more. 

In 2x06, even though we don’t see Imaginary Jemma in the outfit first shown in 1x06, there’s a scene where Fitz is turned away, caressing his shoulder and murmuring to himself before the real Jemma arrives.

1x06: “Oh, Fitz. It’s the most perfect opportunity to see the world. We’d be fools to pass this one up.” 6x06: “Chin up, Fitz. There’s nothing to be afraid of.” I’m sure these were both said during the same conversation. Both show Jemma’s insistence that they join and Fitz’s reluctance. And in 1x06, Fitz does not disguise his blame, and Jemma does not disguise her guilt.

“You’ve been beside me the whole damn time.”

When Jemma requests that Coulson tell her dad first, he says they’re not there yet, and he refuses to listen. You can tell he’s still harboring guilt for what happened to Tony and will be damned if it happens to Simmons. But then Jemma emits a little please, and Coulson gives the second devastating nod of the episode. He’s already so attached to her, and his helplessness is killing him.

Ophelia describes Fitz’s true nature as being a romantic, and she’s right. The moment Jemma’s life is threatened, Fitz barrels through the lab doors, risking viral infection, and then prepares to jump out of a plane. Without question. 

But there’s something else about that too. From episodes 1-5, Fitz has a crush on Skye. In this episode, his feelings shift dramatically, and I’m one of the herd that believes that that last shot of Fitz was him discovering his feelings for Jemma. Even if Iain didn’t play it that way, I think the script does. That doesn’t mean the last shot isn’t layered and nuanced, and there are more things about that last look that can be discussed. His affection for Jemma does not waver until the end of “Self Control” when his memories are displaced, and he’s devoted to Ophelia. Once he’s out of the Framework, he’s all in with Jemma again. There is not a single episode where Fitz is not romantically into someone. I wonder if part of that, the desire to be with someone, has to do with the lack of affection from his father that he endured as a child. 

When Fitz is struggling with the parachute straps, Ward appears with a thump, so I think he jumped from the top stair of the spiral staircase, and I gotta give him props. 

Skye hugging Simmons is everything. Even though Fitz is Jemma’s person, and Coulson is Skye’s, Skye and Simmons care a lot about each other, and their relationship subtly grows into something beautiful. And when you think that in the prior episode, Skye was betraying her team to save her boyfriend, it’s a nice touch to see how much Skye cares for Simmons despite everything she’s done. 

Also, aesthetically, in 1x06, Skye hugs Simmons after Ward and Simmons lightheartedly talk about Ward saving her. Ward is off to the side, allowing Skye and Simmons to have their moment. In 2x06, the three of them have another short scene. But this time, Jemma steps in front of Skye, cutting off contact between the two, and tells him the next time she sees him, she’ll kill him. Oh, the times... they are a’changing.

In 1x06, when May asks Coulson how Simmons is doing, Coulson answers that she’s “amazingly resilient. You’d never know she almost died.” I have to give the writers all the props with this because what Coulson says displays the main way Jemma handles trauma from here on out. And not only is that seen time and time again, It’s discussed and addressed as incredibly unhealthy in 6x06.

“Don’t let anyone know. That’s the whole idea.” 

In 1x06, May intuits that the traumatic experiences both Simmons and Coulson endured have affected them in a big way, whether they acknowledge it or not. In 3x06, May has a similar discussion with Bobbi about her traumatic experience with Ward. May is the quickest to catch on to these changes in mood and action for incredibly obvious reasons. 

In 1x06, Fitz laments that he couldn’t have done “the whole James Bond in mid-air type of thing.” In 5x06, Fitz leaps from the balcony, shoots the laser barrier control in mid-air, and lands on the platform. 

In 1x06, when Jemma says, “you’re the hero,” Fitz gives her a little yeah. The last shot of him shows how much he doesn’t believe her. I think this is a gorgeous last scene.

Not only is the FitzSimmons storyline incredible with phenomenal acting, but the rest of the team have nice character moments too. And if that wasn’t enough, the monster-of-the-week plot is incredibly engaging, and the actor playing Tony Diaz gives such a beautiful performance. In many ways, this episode is a game changer, I’m not going to even play coy about ranking it:

FZZT

Eye Spy

Pilot

Girl in the Flower Dress

The Asset

0-8-4

[ellsey]

Agents of Shield Rewatch 1x02 0-8-4

It’s gonna be blue skies from here on out *BOOM*

That’s a way to start an episode

I love flashbacks

I find myself second guessing everything Ward says and does before the big reveal

“We have two kids on this bus that aren’t cleared for combat, and now you’re adding a third.” Momma May has concerns.

Can someone sell me these Shield branded water bottles?

I love how well the Fitzsimmons dynamic is established so early on. I feel like a lot of the credit goes to Lil and Iain for just being phenomenal actors.

FITZSIMMONS TEMPLE SELFIE

Both alien and German? I see what you did there show.

Melinda the Cavalry May and Bahrain...nooooooo I’m sad already

May gives the eyeroll of “work together? riiiiiiiight”

Poor Skye just wants to be a part of the group :( 

Ha Jemma’s little nervous speech about how you regret leaving the lab at all is funny but also sad because she has so much trauma ahead and just yeah

Jemma is just eyerolling her way through this episode isn’t she? It’s kind of hilarious.

Most of them are for Fitz though, which, fair. According to my husband our marriage is one constant eyeroll by me. He’s kidding. I think.

Did Ward really get shot or is this just some kind of play to win the trust and loyalty of the bus kids?? 

TEAMWORK WOO!

Fitz hugging the wall kills me every time

Work hard play hard am I right?

I love seeing our family happy here at the end, but it hurts knowing what’s actually going on here BOO WARD.

Remember when they used to let movie MCU people mingle with this show? Pepperidge Farm remembers.

Overall another solid episode. I’d give it 7 Fitzsimmons and 1 Deke on the Fitzsimmons Family Scale. No, I’m not just making this scale up as I go along, why would you say that?

My song for this episode is “Get Set” by Taxiride. Yes there’s a theme here. We’ll see how long that lasts. 

[onnabox]

If you don't mind can I ask which other fandoms you're thinking about expanding to? Don't worry, I'll always still follow you, you're no joke one of my favourite blogs. I like variety on my dashboard!

Dude, you frickin lovely human, thank you. I’m finding posting about more than one topic is far more fun. For a whole year I did my best to metaphorically stay in my lane as to not offend certain people. Hint: they’ll find a reason to be offended. It’s exciting to stretch outside of the approved* small box.

I love The Magicians. It’s witty, comedic, bluntly real, and horrifyingly dark all at the same time. Like, several episodes are so intense they needed to place numbers to self help hotlines at the end. If you can handle flagrant cursing, occasional gore, and self aware millennial jokes, I beyond recommend it.

Other than that, The 100 is definitely fantastic and Agents of Shield just got renewed for two more (!) seasons. Iain de Caestecker is a phenomenal actor. Marvel in general? Maybe Vikings, The Last Kingdom, and Game of Thrones? Outside of Marvel and GoT all of these are WAY too underappreciated on tumblr.

 A lot of people have given me some amazing recommendations I’m going to check out, but I’m always open to more, too.

[ancientchinesesolutions]

Payton Milton’s “beginning” .

Allow me to begin - from what I would call - the beginning... It was September of 2012, I had just turned 18 the month before. One day upon waking up, I remember looking around my room - seeing that everything remained (physically) the same - "This is definitely my room...", I thought "But something is NOT the same." but even to this day, I could not explain to you for sure why that was. I sat there for a while before thinking hysterically before I left my bedroom, hoping that my mother who I lived with at the time, wouldn't look me in the eyes and I remember thinking this thought, and thinking "WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH ME. Why am I afraid to look my mom in the eyes?" and the answer to the question hit me like a ton of bricks "Because I know she can feel my thoughts... & I don't want her to know." This answer did not leave me feeling well. Fast forward a few months - I had quit smoking weed, started working out every day, & researching brain health, taking supplements such as ginkgo biloba, and attempting to meditate (I say attempting because I would usually just wind up putting myself to sleep). All to no avail, my anxiety was constant, and much worse around people. The only people I felt comfortable around anymore were people who could easily take me out if I did anything wrong. It was as if I had this constant nagging in my brain, telling me I was a threat to everyone around me, it was seemingly inescapable. I spent a few years living my life like this... It was quite the excruciating existence & I wasn’t sure it would ever end. I remember at one point, I was working in the back of a pizza shop, sincerely missing the feeling of boredom, wondering if I would ever be able to find a wife to have kids with in the state of mind I couldn't seem to alleviate, or escape. I was determined to live my life - I was not brave enough to commit suicide is what I would tell myself, and so, this wreckage of what was once a proud young man, continued on. It was not long after this that I reconnected with a friend of mine who shared the same experience as me, her name was Sarah. She had just began dating a Qi Gong teacher, and she wanted to introduce me to him. So she picked me up from that same pizza shop, and we went over to his place. She had asked him to guide us through a Qi Gong form, and he did. I thought it was pretty cool, I didn't really think to much of it in the beginning. Over the next couple months we all spent at least one day a week hanging out, and he had guided us through the same form 3 times - thats when I decided to stop being guided and start learning. So I observed him as carefully as possible, asked him questions about the different moves involved in the form, and was able to remember the entire form on my own. That is when I began my individual practice. At the time I was training myself in Muay Thai drills using YouTube, I spent about an hour per day doing this - but the Qi Gong form I had learned from Mark, my teacher, seemed to be what I wanted to do instead. So every other day I replaced my Martial Arts practice with this Qi Gong form for just less than two weeks I was practicing Qi Gong every other day for about an hour. One day - I had a vision about half way through my Qi Gong form - my first, full waking vision ever... I was flying over mountains, through clouds on the back of a giant Black - Gold trimmed Chinese Dragon, who appeared to be swimming through the Sky. He spoke to me without words and in essence, this is what he said "I am sorry for taking so long to get to you, but you must understand how small you truly are compared to the bigger things I must tend to, I had to wait until you were in between my larger callings, and here you are... & if you want to help me... This is how you can do it." I was filled to the brim with purpose for life in that moment. The thing he wanted me to do was spread the Art of Qi Gong. My anxiety was lifted, & I haven't struggled with it since. When it would rear its head at me, I would find it laughable - and I would begin my Qi Gong breathing. This was during the Late Spring/Early Summer of 2015, my 21st birthday was right around the corner. Over the next few months I had begun developing my Qi Gong practice into nothing short of a miracle - it seems I have the best luck when it comes to stumbling across amazingly authentic lineages in my Arts & Practices. I started seeing things like energy sparks, which made me feel with absolutely no doubt I knew what they meant, their origin, and was able to confidently respond to them. These newfound perceptions baffled & amazed me - how do you tell people you can see energy? & that meditating with specific movements & intentions in a certain order brought these new awarenesses to light? Well the short answer is - you can't. Not if you want people to take you seriously and not treat you like a loon! It was around this time I got a girlfriend, and not long after that my younger brother came down with the same anxiety that I had experienced. I was excited - because I had already found the cure. All he had to do was listen to me... I did not foresee what happened in the coming month as a possibility. Long story short I did not treat my brother with the amount of kindness that he required to be drawn into the only solution I was able to find in those long 3 years of anxiety. He ended up attempting to take his own life and failing once, but if there was something that anybody who knew my brother well should know about him. It's that He was determined, and He always got what He set out to get. September 7th, Labor Day, 2015 - He had an episode & stole my dads car. Driving straight off a 3-way intersection onto HWY 9 in Snohomish, WA at about 120 MPH he hit a tree, and got stuck as the car burned up. Ending his life... He had spent the last couple weeks of his life making amends with people he felt he ought to. His values shifted dramatically, from being an entrepreneur to wanting to heal people. I was so excited to spend our future pursuing the same path, pushing each other to be greater through brotherly competition. You could say what I miss most about my brother is the future we never had. This happening brought me great despair - which I have transformed into another reason to spread the Ancient Chinese Healing Art that brought back my ability to feel at peace. I was to start college later that September. To save you some time it was short lived, and I did not return for the second quarter. Traditional school was never really my strong suit. I needed something I was truly interested in to shine, & I never really found that within the school system. So I began searching for residential/live-in Martial Arts schools. You would be surprised at how very few of these you can actually find, I found none within the United States when I originally searched (for hours upon hours & multiple days). I eventually found Nam Yang retreat in Thailand. It was a Kung Fu retreat, they trained full-time - 35 Hours of training a week were scheduled. Included in their tuition was room & board, breakfast & dinner, but what really drew me in was their reputation for practicing Qi Gong (They spell it Chi Kung, but it really is the same thing).  Master Iain Armstrong performs various Qi demonstrations, including washing his face with broken glass, slapping a chain lit on fire, being kicked in the groin, and even bending swords & spears with the soft spot on his neck! This was just amazing to me, and the decision practically made itself. I signed up for their teacher training program as soon as I could get the funds together. I flew out and arrived Nov. 1st, 2017 to begin my training. I had never really been in an official teaching position before my time spent training with Master Iain, and I wouldn't find this out until earlier this year (2019), but man am I glad that he was the first man to teach me how to teach. His teaching methods are refined to a point of genius. Everything from day one compiles with perfect synchronicity well into the 4th month, and by that time, I had become my own best teacher. That is not to say I have nothing more to learn from him. What it means is that I understood the concepts that make up the Tiger-Crane Art to the point where I knew that developing myself further required constant contradictions, & variations in my training. There was never "nothing" that needed improvement. To improve one aspect you must, at times, break another. Just to come back and re-develop the broken aspect until both, contradicting motions, were able to be performed simultaneously, coinciding with perfect order & execution. In order to expand, you must contract, in order to push more effectively, you must practice how to pull better. The list of contradictions is practically endless, and they are all true! One of the most amazing things I had the pleasure of learning & experiencing was the synchronicities I discovered between Qi Gong & Kung Fu. The Horse riding stance, taught to us allowed the torso to expand even larger than embryonic breathing by itself does, and I have always been a big believer in the little differences. Everything has a point where it must reach in order to achieve its purpose, and without reaching that point, the miracle of Qi Gong & Kung Fu will not be realized. By the time I left Nam Yang, I earned my Instructor's certificate, granting me permission to teach the Tong Ling Chi Kung, Shuang Yang, & Tiger-Crane Kung Fu under the Nam Yang name. That was back in July of 2018, & perhaps the biggest accomplishment thus far in my life. Upon returning to the US of A, I began to establish a student base. This proved to be phenomenally difficult! Over the span of a year I managed to teach about six Qi Gong students, and one in both Kung Fu & Qi Gong. I struggled to charge my students, as I was having a difficult time putting a price upon these Ancient Chinese Arts that I sincerely believe transcend monetary value. (How do you put a price on effectively treating severe anxiety?) I also struggled with justifying the cost of a studio's upkeep, and as a result, hymned and hawed as I attempted to get more students interested in my services, usually just in an effort to spread the word about me. I was making no money, traveling to and from my students (who were usually over an hour away), you could say that in a way I was paying to teach. I needed a change! I wanted a reset, a change of pace. I wanted to leave society behind and disappear into the mountains for some isolated training - after all, I could easily spend 35 hours a week training without the stresses of today's world upon me. There was just one hang up... I was not confident in my ability to take care of myself, and I couldn't justify the lack of nutrition that would come without knowing how to properly forage, and hunt or fish. Thats when I began researching how to survive in the wilderness, & I came across Joshua Hamlin's & Rob Allen's survival YouTube Channel. I paid a visit to their website, and saw them offering a 45-day Wilderness Survival Instructor Course, in which they claimed to be able to teach you how to confidently survive in the wilderness - with just a knife. That was exactly what I needed in order to disappear into the mountains with confidence. It didn't take long before I convinced myself to sign up. I was absolutely thrilled to add survival to my teaching arsenal. I thought, “What if I could teach people how to confidently train themselves to become competent Martial Artists & awaken/improve their awareness by practicing Qi Gong & Meditation in the Wilderness...?” My vision had transformed! I had developed a passion for teaching, and I couldn't imagine anything more awesome than being able to teach people everything they'd need to know to confidently isolate in the wilderness, and train - not only their body, but their mind, to become the most effective instrument of being possible! Prior to attending the 45-day Wilderness Survival Instructor Course at Sigma 3 Survival School, I had no idea how great of a teacher Master Iain had truly crafted me to be. My standards of expectation were very high considering the price that I paid... To my dismay, it seemed the Instructor program was designed to weed out the weak, ensuring that only the best will filter through & earn their Instructor's certificate. A sound plan really. It is survival after all.In the beginning I abhorred this approach, and was extremely upset about it - but I refused to be defeated so easily. In addition to building shelters, fire making, procuring water, and foraging for sustenance or creating medical supplies with, we learned other various crafts necessary to sustain yourself inevitably with more ease in the wilderness, like making baskets & cordage... But the two most important lessons I learned were these; 1) How truly great my standard is for teaching my own students, and the value that it holds. 2) If you want something, and you have the means to create a functional version that fills that void - it is better to fill that void with something barely functional, than to put it off thinking that a perfect/ideal version is the only thing worth your time & effort.