#idk if this would be remotely enjoyable to read

[finitevariety]

writing a Problematic Greg Fic

[punmster]

having an existential crisis because I finally cracked and searched up a summary for Manacled and found out one of the DMSMG alternate endings (which I've changed before this) is like. kinda similar to it??

[steveharrington]

hi! do you have any recent horror book recommendations you've enjoyed?

hiii!! i do! okay im gonna cheat a little right off the bat and give you one i read like over a year ago idk if that still counts as recent BUT:

devolution by max brooks is my favorite book i’ve read in the last year or so. it’s about a small wealthy community in remote mt. rainier that’s touted to be the most technologically advanced and automated community and a Vision of the Future buttttttt things don’t go according to plan and also there are bigfoots ❤️ i found the humor so smart and cutting esp in the age of ai bullshit and having elon musk shoved in our faces, plus the characters were all very unique and really unlike other protagonists i’ve read in horror. just a really solid book AND it made me even more scared of monkeys

i also just read bunny by mona awad and it was a crazy and wild ride let me just say that. again very distinct and unlike anything i’ve ever really read before in terms of the plot…i fear even going into the plot too much because i truly think it’s hard to discuss what happens in this book without giving away elements that are more fun to discover as you’re reading. definitely some body horror elements in this so if that’s not your thing i would maybe steer clear (also mentioned animal death which i did find upsetting but it’s not in graphic detail). that post i rb’d recently about the joy of reading books you don’t completely understand really applied to bunny for me because there are parts where the narrative becomes so…unreal and jumbled that it’s hard to always know what’s happening, but i did have fun with that!

ALSO an extremely recent read that i just finished last night is my best friend’s exorcism by grady hendrix, and at first i was very unsure if i’d like it but i ended up finishing it in two nights so. it held my attention for sure. it’s set in the 80s and there’s a bit tooooo many constant references for my taste (and i say this as a stranger things enjoyer…i wish i could write an essay about how imo stranger things does 80s nostalgia better than so many that try to emulate their version of it) and it’s about bestie abby and bestie gretchen who unfortunately experience the horrors of demon possession. i really enjoy narratives where all the adults are useless idiots and only the kids/teenagers are in tune to The Truth, which this book sells really well. i was also admittedly very charmed by a lot of the humor (the exorcist maybe my new fav character ever) and how it didn’t take Satanism too seriously and kinda hammed it up

[celiaelise]

I watched the movie "Limbo" with my family! It's about a young Syrian refugee who is stuck on a remote Scottish island while waiting to be granted asylum. I quite liked it! Probably because it was very slow-paced, I have trouble with fast-paced stuff, like action movies.

It wasn't really, like, a feel-good movie; it was honestly kind of gutting at several moments, which is understandable given the subject matter. But the story is told in a very grounded, respectful, almost... gentle, sort of way. I can definitely imagine that other people might even find it boring, but I liked it.

I DO wish we had gotten to hear more oud music!!! I get that that's not what the story is about, but just, personally, I would've liked it hear it. Well, perhaps I should look some up on my own.

One weird thing was that my dad put it on because he said my stepmom had expressed interest in it, and then she didn't really pay attention? Like, at all. She spent a lot of time talking to her daughter, (who was kind of in another room and did not even pretend to be interested in the film) or scrolling through her phone, including when the characters were speaking Arabic, and she would need to read the captions to know what was being said.

My dad's told me before that he thinks she consumes movies in a very different way than us... like she's more about the sensory experience than the story itself? He has aphantasia and face blindness, so it's not unusual for him to ask her to clarify which character is onscreen. But he's told me that sometimes she doesn't even know??? And that doesn't seem to bother her, or detract from her enjoyment of the film? Wild.

Oh also I started talking afterward about the commonalities between Spanish and Arabic, and I was getting excited, but nobody seemed very interested. 🙄 Like, I'm pretty certain that in the phone call where Omar and his mother discuss Stallone and Schwarzenegger, at one point one of them said something that meant like, "the same guy", and it sounded a lot like "igualmente"??? Though that's also kind of a cognate in English, so would it make sense for Spanish and Arabic to share it? idk, I've never gotten around to actually studying Arabic or linguistics 😓

But yeah, I tried to tell my dad about "ójala" and "inshallah", and he did not seem interested, probably because he's not familiar with either phrase, lol. (He's always pushed ME to learn Spanish, but seems to have concluded that it's impossible for him to learn, even though he grew up in the barrio and has admitted he has very good pronunciation!) Also he might've just been getting tired, lol, he's getting a little old d:

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

AWW MY LOVELY ARIII 💞 i’m incredibly sorry that this was so late, i had the fattest nap ever known to both man AND womankind (13 whole hours is WILD 🤯). whelp ig it’s just my sleep debt catching up on me :((( but tysm for checking up on me bby! i rly hope uve had a good day today. don’t forget to eat well, drink water nd get those full 8 hours of well deserved sleep!!

ahhh work was sm chiller than i expected yesterday. i work part time at mecca (australian equivalent for sephora) and there was not a single 12 year old sephora kid in sight! phewww 😮‍💨 i remember once, majority of my shift was spent cleaning the glow recipe aisle bc some 10 year old thought it was a good idea to spill the samples everywhere 😭 that was not fun hsjsjs

AND OMFG TOJI W SUNNIES 😻😻 the things i wld do to see toji in summer istg. ig i just have a thing for dilfs atp 🤷‍♀️ hahaha i doubt i cld fix him tho but iss okk 🥲 ALSO ALSO YOU AND SUGU WLD WORK SO WELL TOGETHER HSHSHSH. relationship goals right there!

uni bf sugu wld definitely have a tattoo or two asw as some piercings. no bc why do i feel like a helix piercing wld suit him SO WELL THO. like i genuinely believe sugu’s jewellery game wld be unbeatable. like i can see his piercings and all that (cs i picture him with more than one piercing iykwim) lookinf so aesthetically pleasing and HAJSJSJK. also the turtle necks are SO REALL. like he would 100% wear glasses whilst he’s in his dorms or maybe during campus asw. ++ i feel like he wld suit those reading glasses so well but he’d be the type to wear it occasionally and i can just imagine like most of his classmates like ‘wait you wear glasses!? 😮’ rahh we were robbed of a uni geto fs :(

also i saw how ur a lit major and can i just say that’s like the coolest thing ever what?? hsjsjsj lit majors seem so so cool omg. oddly specific question but dy guys have like a certain amount of time you spend reading a certain book?? if so, how long is it usually? ahh i’m sorry if that was a stupid question 😭 i read INCREDIBLY slow but i wanna get back into it yk. my reading slump’s been going on for far too long but idk which book to read to help me get out of said reading slump hshshsh. i’m still in awe that ur a lit major tho 🥹 like i hold utmost respect for all lit major students. i shldve guessed that u majored in lit/smth remotely to do with creative writing bcs your sugu drabble was written so BEAUTIFULLY AHHH. okok my words probably don’t do it any justice but it was just written so well to the point it was mind blowing yk? ahh i wish my brain worked like urs!! i 100% see sugu as that caring and doting bf who’d just be hyper aware of everything about you down to the smallest things ever. he’s just so sweet and so loveable istg 🥰🥰 i think about cult leader geto at least once everyday (roman empire much!) but i literally cannot emphasise how much i loved ur geto drabble omfg. the yearning was just 🤌🤌🤌 especially during that scene where mc brought up how sugu must’ve loved his bsf a lot, the change in his mannerisms were so subtle yet it was so evoking at the same time. like sure it was subtle, but it was enough for mc to k that she had hit a sore spot. also i just thought it was perfect in symbolising the strong bond sugu had w toru. like the mere mention of toru wld cause sugu to have like sm nostalgic memories rush back to him. HAKSJSJ thank u sm for gracing us w your drabble bby. im not even exaggerating when i say that it genuinely pulled my heartstrings HARD. hshshsh it was such an enjoyable read!

btw to answer ur question earlier, i’m currently pursuing my bachelor of biomedicine with a major in integrated dental sciences. i’m a stem girly thru and thru. idk australia has this funky thing where we specialise in our degrees almost instantly (i’m not too sure if it’s the same for other countries).

++ i was scrolling on pinterest earlier and i came across this

HELLO WHY CAN I LOWK PICTURE SUGU JUST MUNCHING ON HIS BAGUETTES IDK 😭 emily in paris who? i only know suguru geto in paris 😌

tysm for taking the time to read all this ari 💗 i appreciate you so so much. hope you’ve had a good day/night so far! mwah ilyyy <333

UKI MY DEAREST <3333 no need to apologize pls!! i’m so happy that you got a bunch of rest!!!!! :33 AND I’M SO GLAD WORK WAS CHILL TOO gosh the glow recipe thing…. 😭😭 u have my condolences. i’m proud of you for working so hard!! pls pat yourself on the back since i can’t 🫂🫂

DILF LOVERS UNITE BTW i’m soooo weak for toji…….. for all the jjk dilfs actually……… they’re just so good. toji w sunnies is gonna rot in my brain atp he would look so perfect 😵‍💫😵‍💫 ur brain is so big uki. AND EVERYTHING ABT COLLEGE BF SUGU PLS HAVE MERCY ON MY HEARTTTTT he makes me feel ill………… THE HELIX PIERCINGGGG YOU’RE SO RIGHT!!!! and him wearing glasses in his dorm….. i would simply Explode he’s sooooo bf it’s crazy :(((((

AAA AND YOU’RE A BIO MAJOR THAT’S SO COOL WHAT????? dental care too!!!!!! stem girlies have my heart and respect always always always 🙏🙏🙏 in my brain the stem girlies and liberal arts majors r holding hands :33 we respect u sm yknow!!! as for your question……. honestly i don’t rlly keep track of how long it takes me to read a certain book 😭😭 i think i usually work under the assumption that i read like. one page per minute?? ish??? but that also totally depends on the format…. so i can’t rlly give u a sure answer :’3 BUTTT pls never be discouraged to read a book just bc u read slow!! that’s normal!!!! reading becomes so much more enjoyable when you find a book that you enjoy and have fun reading, and at the point the time won’t matter bc you’ll be done before you know it!! aaa i’d love to give you some recs but i’d have to know more abt your taste 😭 a book i read recently that wasn’t toooo long + was written beautifully + made me cry LMAO is ”the travelling cat chronicles” by hiro arikawa!! if you like cats it’s def for you :33 usually when i find books to read i check a summary and some quotes just to get a feel for it, so that’s a good idea if you wanna find one that suits your taste!!

……. i hope that’s at least . a little bit helpful PHDKDBF i’m sorry uki 😭😭 i’m probably the least competent lit major when it comes to giving advice on reading BUT i’m cheering you on!!!! literature is sooooo genuinely wonderful when you aren’t being forced to read a book you don’t like for school lmao. and if you want recs my dms and inbox r always open for u!!! don’t hesitate to ask <333

aaaaaaaa but uki 🥺🥺🥺🥺 pls i cried you are SO unbelievably sweet ….. ur tags on the geto drabble made me feel so warm!!!!! and i’m just so giddy that u liked it!!!!! all ur words r so kind pls T—T i also love and adore cult leader geto…. i genuinely think he would be so soft and doting and sickeningly devoted to his beloved. he just loves them so much his heart completely overflows :(( our nostalgic sappy wife……….. he means the world to me

AND PLSSSS THE SUGU PIC 😭😭😭 he’s so sillyyyyyyy i love him sm <333 ty for that cute little treat hehe, i hope your day/night is going super well too!!! and tysm for taking the time to write this out, i love chatting w you <333 here are some other silly gojo images in return >:3 … the resemblance is uncanny i fear . our kitty cat of all time !!!

[bisluthq]

I didn’t necessarily mean it would all happen in one go, but you would have to try every single thing they’re into. But yeah, I agree with you, I have no idea how weird Jack might be and I don’t think I’m curious enough to do it

Oh if it’s not all in one go I think I’m dating Jack lol.

a little while back we found a thing on the Hub that neither of us had ever seen before and it was the first thing neither of us were even remotely interested in trying lol: dudes shoving their balls in (either hole, we hadn’t seen either before). We watched a ton of videos of this after we discovered this because we 1) didn’t know it’s possible 2) we couldn’t figure out how it’s enjoyable for either party.

killed the mood for a bit obvi because we were very caught up in like “what the fuck” and couldn’t stop laughing and clearly we’d been watching porn as like background to what we were doing but then that shit became the foreground and we couldn’t look away lol. Wild ass shit. Literally.

I will also say if you’re with someone who can laugh with you at porn like properly and get into it at the right times and you read my blog then idk that may be your lobster (until you break up with them which you might).

[deathberi]

Hello hello dear Eri!!! Coming late here, my week was crazy and busy as hell! How was your week? Hopefully a peaceful one 🥰 weekend work duties sounds terrible, i hope you can get some rest as often as you want despite that! Yesss you're right, it's more pleasant to go out during your days offs when it's during the week instead of weekends! There really is less people in the streets, and i'm living in a big city, it's really more enjoyable! But i can't see my family as often as i want because we have different schedules and weekends! that's the most annoying thing...

Ohh yes it's always sad to notice little things that we dislike in series we really really like! I'm more the kind of person who likes so so much a serie and will act blind about things I dislike :') honestly I think i should rewatch/reread bleach before watching the last season, it's really been a while since I read the end

I do not have any patience too, recently I'm I thinking about reading blue lock so bad, but I love watching the anime, and I know if i'm starting to read i will lose interest for the anime ; that's also why I havent started to read Kaguya yet because i really enjoy the anime, also I already have watched 3 seasons so I guess I can wait more and no read 🤷‍♀️

Gosh I saw all the hate about the end of tokrev, and even before, when the last arc has started to be published. It's astounding. People absolutely didn't get it, and they were spreading hate on twitter and elsewhere, before and now! I was almost 100% sure it was gonna end well for mikey, at least ; i desired to see everyone be saved but I wouldn't have imagined how it would have became possible and I'm very glad how the end has turned unexpected but good! And yes I feel the same, those who spread hate about tokrev are those who haven't read the manga, properly, they were just here because it was popular or something. Because if you properly read it you can easily guess that it will end happily? It was the goal of Takemichi!!! Ngl the rushed part it's something sad to me, but I wonder if that didn't happen because of the editors? Same for bleach i think, it was very popular so the editor asked for more and then it has lost in popularity and wanted Tite Kubo to end his manga? No sure about it tho

Dhjsjs i totally get what you mean!! And it's working in the other way too, I can like a serie more than characters from it themselves, idk if it makes sens bdbsjs

Oh i guessed right about ichiruki, i mean fortunately ; i dont know much about dragon ball/ and digimon but as I can see, seems like you adore these ships a lot!! 👀👀 I totally get it!!! Deuteragonist, the best type fr, i like main characters but if they're at their best it's essentially thanks to the second mains isn't it? 💁‍♀️

Actually i haven't, i've only checked your fav but not your watching/reading list shsjs oh so I'll definitely recommend you to give a try to sakamoto day, I'm pretty sure you'll like or at least i hope so!! Ousama ranking is definitely a cute one ; I've watched it during a sad period of my life during this year and idk, it has cheered me up somehow

Okay okay okay I totally get it for one piece ; tbh I've started it something like 10 years ago and I paused it nearby chapter 600 (like you) FOR YEARS, before I caught up a year ago after rewatching everything! If by chance, even the tiniest, you desire to follow one piece again then, then I'd love to talk about it with you djsks 👀💖

Have a good weekend Eri, next time I'll try to come earlier here🧡

hi santa!! omg dw about it i understand life can get crazy busy on the most random moment. i’ve had pretty chill weeks lately and yep totally get you with enjoying big cities during less peak days and hours but also sacrificing the usual common sched with the fam and friends. i actually live away from most of my fam and now i’m answering late cuz they called me for a month long vacation (not that i’ll be really entirely free, i’m working remotely so i can go anywhere if i wanted to without taking much leaves, but this time theres lotsa travel involved plus it’s too long to leave my pc so i had bring stuff and set up here and there) and it started with a long beach trip!

ah i wish i could do that but no, i’ll be hating every single thing i dislike about it…while still consuming every single piece of media lmfao. i would suggest you at least reread some stuff if you plan to watch this latest one. i get annoyed when i see people over glorifying this latest season without even remembering shit from manga and everything that happened before this arc 😂

the top of my mind says anything comedic and not too plot heavy, i can stay anime only/first! i can see how that works well with kaguya. blue lock stuff is everywhere but still i havent started watching it 🫣

yeah they were just on tokrev for its popularity. tokrev twt is too loud you just know majority never looked at the source content and just out there for the clout lol. and each time wakui kills one i just go “ok youve done it again but if they dont end up happy im burning your house” 🤣 cuz how can it not end that way that’ll be like basically throwing away everything takemichi did. ahhh, editor issues. idk if there was any of that in tokrev as i stayed away from tokrev twt aside from a few fanartists, but yeah so much with bleach things were a mess

thats totally possible true! i can like this one for the overall stuff that it is. hehe if someone calls this a ship blog i wouldn’t deny it 🤣 my solid shipping shenanigans happen when theres a resident grumpy boy i can perfectly pair with the best girl (and picking girly favs does not happen as often as simply picking best boy deuteragonists). thats true!! in my kid and teen years i’ve auto focused on the second mains without batting an eyelash but now my appreciation for sunshine protags have gone up but that also means i’ve paid much attention to them now to enforce they couldnt be whatever they are without the grumpy babes 😂

they do sound great! thanks for the recs im definitely taking them. for op i feel like i just need the right push to pick it up fully again as we all know it would take some effort and commitment? 😂 (ack maybe cuz i have no ship in it and no one’s grumpy enough for my tastes 🤣)

thank you santa! you too have a great week ahead! til next time~ ^^

[bigwriterenergy]

YANDERE JOESTAR / READER

anonymous asked: “May I request a yandere Johnny headcanon If you have too many request and doing commission Please ignore this and take care of yourself ☺️”

omg thank you so much for this message ... it would be an honor to answer your request!! :)) i love to write for you all ... . i really do ..... thats why i love having my inbox open 24/7 so even if i dont like .... answer it .. . .. you can still get it out and onto the page you know? idk like if yall ever need to come into my inbox and just need to put something to words and for someone to read it, i’m always here. regardless of whether or not its jjba related. lmao sorry im kind of rambling but this comment just touched me ;v; thanks again for the request and i’d love to write for you. :)

i also want to direct y’all to @dear-yandere​! her yandere johnny is absolutely chilling! wonderful characterization :)

yandere johnny is absolutely pathetic. he’s incredibly skilled in manipulation and ensuring that his darling is absolutely entangled in his trap.

i absolutely adore the precedent set by vani tbh. her yandere johnny is an asshole and an absolute awful human being and my characterization is similar. 

my yandere johnny uses the pity he could rouse from his darling and runs with it. he belittles her. he criticizes her. the omission of kind words is just a part of his charm, she’ll convince herself.

more often than not, he’s giving her a dull expression and a completely emotionless disposition. if anything, she’s his human punching bag. whenever he’s mad at the world, he uses her to express it.

“you really expected me to do that? just who do you think i am, woman?”

though, if she ever were to leave, he’d be quick to use every manipulation tactic in the book. threats of suicide and hopelessness, thrown casually into the air, as though he were talking about weather or something in passing. somehow, she always remained right back in his fingertips.

“if you leave, what are you gonna do? who would love you? who would love me?”

this also extends to her friends and family. he makes an effort to disconnect himself from all conversations involving around them. he knows that if they start planting seeds of “oh, johnny’s a manipulative bastard, you should leave him” it’ll erode the darling he’s already curated for his desires.

he wants you all to himself and finds enjoyment in belittling.

he projects a lot onto her. all his failures, all his insecurities, they sadly all go to her.

yandere johnny is is very sexual. when he first became paraplegic, i don’t think he was very inclined to search for partners. i do think once he has someone to exploit and prey on, he’ll rediscover his libido. 

giving little regard to whether darling is in the mood or not, johnny will often begin sweet talking to accompany his more sensual touches. she will just be so surprised to be treated so nicely that he can say anything remotely romantic and she’ll be more inclined to put up with him.

while johnny is not my worst yandere, i do think he’s higher on the list for being one of the more emotional damaging.

“johnny ..” his lips felt like slime against your clean skin. each lingering touch only seemed to heighten annoyance and frustration. this was the third day this week he had attempted to descend upon you; the familiar, heavy sound of steps from behind carried much weight. they rang in your ears and were comparable to the shrill sound of shattering glass. 

you felt his anterior press into you from behind. his heat proved to have an opposite effect; the chill that ran through your spine revealed just how disgusting you thought his touch was. the kitchen sink where you were stationed at held your eyes. the suds that collected near the rim of the drain seemed far more interesting than whatever excuse johnny had to justify his force. 

“what?” his voice was low when ghosted over the shell of your ear. his breath was warm and comparable to fog, muggy and humid in quality. the fingers he trailed along your waist eventually pulled down to the front of your hips. his pelvis pressed hungrily against the plush of your posterior. his palms pulled you back, ignoring the brief yet futile resistant you may have presented him with. “you sound upset with me.” he made an observation. his words settled into your conscious and pulled breath from your lips. how right he was.

your stiffness should have told him all he needed to know. your reluctance should have been enough. but instead, his mind chalked up your rigidity to a familiar coyness. how demure you were .. regardless of your reservation, you had a duty to him. his blue eyes took in the sight of your nape. an almost animalistic wetting of his lips proved all the carnal desire that raged in his mind. he’d get you one way or another. 

he always did.

“hmph, ya know ..” he murmurs, as though such behavior proved your negligence to him. “i know a whole lot of girls that’d love to be in your position.” the route he took was a familiar one. you could even imagine the taut-jaw grimace he’d wear as he spoke such horrible words. your pruned fingers grip onto the metal of your sink. you almost scowled. the brief silence increased the weight of his words. you felt his hands leave your figure. wasn’t it what you wanted? so why did it feel so wrong? “maybe i’d oughta pay them a visit.” why did such words wound you? the familiar, burning pain in your gut spurred your movement. he almost smirked. you were too easy to stir.

turning to face your husband, you’d note the lack of emotion to his features. his predictability meant that he shouldn’t have been as shocking, right? your lips pursed. the perfect way in which his blond hair fell had lost its, once, novel magic. you gazed into the dark, determined eyes of johnny joestar and saw all your failures. even without speak, you still felt his oppressive influence. his expression soured under the scrutiny.

you kissed him. your lips met in a confused hurry. the sooner you dealt with his irritating virility, the sooner he’d quiet down. 

he played you like a fiddle.

[alolowrites]

Everyone’s Got a Sweet Tooth!

Summary: Bakugou hates sweets. You don’t think this is true and begin a mission to discover his favorite candy. After all, you are the brilliant Candy Master who won’t stop until Bakugou’s sweet tooth is satisfied.

Author’s Note: Hello everyone! I’m so glad I was finally able to write a full fic for Bakugou; it’s been so long. Originally, this was supposed to be for the bingo event, but had trouble fleshing out the story’s direction. I really wanted to write this story since the plot was hilarious to me, idk why. 

Please enjoy!

10.30.21 UPDATE: HI!!!!! I went back and edited the heck out of this baby since it’s my favorite Bakugou story I’ve written. I hope it is now decent lmao. Happy Halloween!! 

Word Count: 2.4K+

“Katsuki, what is the meaning of all this?!”

“The hell are you talkin’ bout?”

“This!” 

You marched with purpose and plopped down on the couch where he sat. Bakugou remained unfazed, clicking on the remote control. He mindlessly surfed through the channels with an attention span of an HR recruiter combing through a mountain pile of resumes. Stupid sitcoms, fake ass “reality” tv shows, QVC advertising their products like it's Black Friday all day, every day. Bakugou frowned—why does he pay so much for these useless channels? 

His eyes teared away from the screen as the phone waved frantically on his left. 

You huffed. “According to Maximus Heroes, you—and I quote—‘bleeping hate sweets!’”

Bakugou clicked his tongue. “Damn idiots censored my words.”

“That’s not the point!”

“Then what is?”

“That you hate sweets!” 

You viciously smacked a pillow at him, ignoring his yells. Bakugou snatched the weapon with a growl. For a soft pillow, it felt like a firm foam roller. You stood up and paced around, arms flailing in the air. 

“How can my boyfriend say such a thing?!” You pointed at your signature black top hat. “Do you know who I am? I’m the lovable Candy Master, CEO of the Candy Basket Factory!” 

Bakugou shrugged. “So?”

“So, you can’t say you hate sweets!” You gripped your chest, sniffling a bit. “I feel as though I’ve been betrayed.”

“Would you sit your ass down?” 

Bakugou tossed the pillow at you and crossed his arm; he was too tired to deal with this nonsense. Somehow the QVC channel looked more appealing now. You begrudgingly plopped on the couch, a small pout growing on your face. Bakugou snuck a glance and sighed, tossing the remote aside. 

“Are you seriously so upset about this?” Instant regret flooded through his mind as he remembered that ridiculous day. “It was a freakin’ answer to a stupid question in a stupid celebrity article.” 

“…maybe…”

Bakugou rolled his eyes. You took off your signature hat and examined it; the hat was firm yet soft and had three peppermint candies artistically attached like a beautiful brooch. You moped silently for an eternity until an exciting idea rushed into your mind. Bakugou jumped as you squealed, his mouth ready for snarl, but you beat him to the punch. 

“I got it!” Two hands eagerly cupped his sharp cheeks, your whimsical eyes meeting his feral ones. They did nothing to damper your beaming smile. “You don’t hate sweets; you just haven’t found your favorite candy!”

Bakugou grabbed your wrist yet didn’t pull them away. Another giggle rang throughout the living room as you shot up from the sofa. A specific look crossed your face—one that both irked and frightened Bakugou to no end; he was through dealing with your shenanigans. 

“Whatever you’re thinkin’ about, the answer is no!”

“Too late! The mind is churning,” you piped, taking a cheerful step toward the doorway. Spinning on your heel, you gave a hat tip to Bakugou and declared, “I won’t rest until that sweet tooth of yours is satisfied!” 

Yup, it was too late. Bakugou had no choice but to go along with this dumb idea. Closing his eyes, he slammed a pillow over his face and screamed.

༛༛ ༛ ༛༺༻༛ ༛ ༛༛

Ground Zero’s hero agency was buzzing with life. Phones rang off the hook, yet all were answered to avoid the voicemail machine. Interns carried endless stacks of papers, their dying arms begging for relief and fingers stinging from brutal paper cuts. The afternoon shift sidekicks clocked in their arrival while the morning ones yawned out the door.

Everything ran like a well-oiled machine, just how Bakugou liked it. He took great pride in this, hiring only the best and brightest. However, none of them held a candle against him—the number two pro hero. Unfortunately, being a prominent hero brought lots of reports he needed to sign.

And he was not excited about this.

“Um, sir?”

“Damnit, Small Head,” Bakugou growled, halting his pen’s movement. Fiery eyes glared at the man peeking around the ajar door. “If you bring me another paper to sign, I will stab this pen in your damn eye!”

“I-I assure you that I bring no reports, sir!” Kioshi, Bakugou’s personal assistant, waddled inside the office, fixing the tie that was strangling his neck. He slid a peculiar package toward his boss and bowed his head. “You have a special delivery from the Candy Master.”  

Bakugou scrunched his eyebrows. On his desk was a white box with an orange ribbon wrapped neatly in the upper left corner. A tiny card sat underneath it, and with closer inspection, had his first name written across in gold letters. Bakugou shooed Kioshi away, waiting to hear the door close to ensure absolute privacy.

At first, Bakugou had a mini stare-down with the gift. When it didn’t burst into flames, he sucked his breath and snatched the card. Bakugou turned it around to read the following message:

Everyone knows you got a sour attitude, but only I get to see that sweet side of yours. Figured these treats might do the trick. I made them just for you!

Enjoy,

C.M

P.S. These are an ~exclusive~ batch from my top-secret collection! So hush-hush!

Bakugou snorted at your writing, tossing the card aside and opening the box. His eyes narrowed at the vibrant gumdrops nestled above the black tissue paper. White sugar lightly coated the green and orange candies, each twinkling under the natural light that shined through his large window. A smirk curled on his lips; the whole package reflected his hero costume.

“Let’s see how good these are.”

Bakugou ate the green gumdrop. It was chewy and sour, the lime flavor making him twitch a bit. The sweetness kicked in ten seconds later. Bakugou tried the orange gumdrop next, and the acid was strong too but enjoyable. He soon devoured the entire box in one sitting.

Once that was done, he marched out of the office to start his daily patrol. It didn’t take long for a stupid thug to cross his path. Bakugou slammed him against the concrete wall, hauling him up with just one hand. The man trembled in fear but stopped squirming and cocked his head to the side, dumbfounded. 

Bakugou growled. “What the hell are you looking at?”

“Your tongue...it got weird colors, man.”

“Eh? The fuck are you talking ‘bout?” 

Bakugou peeked at his reflection on the store’s window. He recoiled when he saw the horrible swirls of green and orange covering his tongue. A vicious scowl crossed Bakugou’s face, his iron grip tightening around the thug’s collar. The guy’s high-pitched yelps fell on deaf ears. 

“Fuckin’ gumdrops!”

They were crossed off the list.

༛༛ ༛ ༛༺༻༛ ༛ ༛༛

“I don’t want it.”

“But, sir, the gift—”

“I know who it’s from, and I’m telling you no.”

“Sir,” Kioshi gripped the massive, cherry red treat in his hand. A black ribbon with long strings almost reached the floor. The assistant sighed. “It’s just a lollipop.”

“Do I look like a fuckin’ baby to ya?” Bakugou crossed his arms, refusing to budge on his childish decision. The irony made Kioshi roll his eyes mentally. “Give it away or something. Now get out.”

“Yes, sir…”

Lollipops were crossed off the list.

༛༛ ༛ ༛༺༻༛ ༛ ༛༛

Another day, another gift Bakugou received from you.

They came sporadically and kept the hero on his toes. He never understood why you sent the gifts directly to his office; you both lived in the same apartment for crying out loud! Worst of all, he could never get a single hint on what candy he would receive next. Every time he asked—or more accurately, demanded—you shot him a coy smile and purred, “Ah, ah, ah! It’s a surprise!”

Bakugou wanted to rip his eyeballs out.

However, he reluctantly played along with your stupid game. Whenever Kioshi entered his office, Bakugou masked his slight interest with the usual scowl. If the assistant didn’t bring candy, then Bakugou blamed him for interrupting his private time. The anger was worse if Kioshi brought more reports for him to sign.

Kioshi was thankful for the days when a new candy gift arrived.

Unfortunately, the last three gifts were complete failures. The first was the strawberry licorice, which dangled in Bakugou’s hand. He took a few bites and complained that he was eating a rubber wheel. Next was a bag of colorful gummy worms. Bakugou shoved a couple in his mouth and swore he felt one of them move on its own. Finally, there was the lemon green jawbreaker; it was the size of a baseball. One look and Bakugou shouted over the phone: “You tryna give me dentures?!”

All three candies were crossed off the list. Still, you didn’t give up and sent another gift to Bakugou. He read the simple message on the card:

Chew and blow to your heart’s content, babe!

Love,

C.M

P.S. I promise this won’t change the color on your tongue, haha!

Bakugou opened the sleek, rectangular box and found a bubble gum packet inside; there were three thin pieces. He slipped one in his mouth, surprisingly pleased with the bold raspberry flavor hitting his taste buds. Bakugou skimmed the card again and did as instructed—he chewed.

Typically, an ordinary bubble gum would lose its flavor after five minutes. But the flavor in your gum only got juicier; it encouraged Bakugou to continue chewing. He then blew a tiny bubble before popping it in his mouth. Not bad, he thought as another bubble expanded in front of him. His chews became more aggressive, and the bubbles more prominent than the previous ones. Stupidly, he puffed out a massive bubble, and it grew…

…and grew…and grew until there was a loud pop.

Bakugou’s roars shook the entire building, spilling cold tea all over Kioshi’s shirt. 

Bubble gum was crossed off the list.

༛༛ ༛ ༛༺༻༛ ༛ ༛༛

Everything was going well down at the Candy Basket Factory. People lined up outside for the magical tours that ran every hour. Kids bounced off the walls as if they were on a sugar rush while their parents felt a migraine pounding on their heads. Inside the factory, the ceilings were high, and the walls were vibrant like the sun. Laughter rang from every corner as employees chit-chatted about their daily lives; they were relaxed yet efficiently worked to the same drumbeat.

A soft smile crept on your face. You were glad everyone was happy; it was the driving force behind your factory’s joyful spirit. Eventually, that spirit would leave these doors and touch billions of people’s hearts with your precious candies.

Just as you closed your eyes, someone barged into your office and barked your name. You chuckled, spinning the leather chair around to meet a furious Bakugou. His nostrils flared like a bull, and his menacing eyes looked ready to kill. However, the gum’s blobs stuck on his porcupine blonde hair squashed the pro hero’s intimidating aura.

“You—”

“—I’m so sorry, boss!” Nozomi panted into the room, hands on her knees as she caught her breath. “I tried stopping him, but he wouldn’t listen.”

“It’s quite alright, Zomi!” You chirped without breaking Bakugou’s intense eye contact. “I can handle him. Please let everyone know I’ll be busy with an important meeting.”

Nozomi bowed and closed the door behind her. Bakugou wasted no time complaining, his hands slamming on your desk. 

“Quit sending me your cavity-infested garbage! I’ve had it with this fuckin’ game.”

“Oh, come on, babe!” You rolled forward and rested your chin on your gloved hand palm. “Can’t I just send my dashing boyfriend some sweet gifts? Get it!” You jokingly slapped his forearm. “Because candies are sweet? Man, I crack myself up at times…”

“You’re insufferable.”  

You winked at him. “But that’s what you love about me!”

Bakugou gritted his teeth and looked away. A light blush tainted his cheeks; he hated how right you were. You walked around the desk and stood beside him, wiping off the fairy sugar dust on his shirt. He probably barged through the sample stand near the entrance, scaring off the poor intern. 

“Alright, alright.” You gave a gentle pat. “Sorry for going a little overboard with the gifts. I was just excited about finding your favorite candy! I don’t want you hating them.”

Bakugou’s anger subsided. “Why is this so damn important to you?”

“Because I love spreading endless joy through sweets.” 

The answer was simple and innocent. Bakugou blinked and was taken aback by the gentleness in your eyes. 

“Candy makes everyone happy,” you chirped. “Knowing someone’s favorite candy helps me bring their smile back whenever they’re upset or lost. Can’t have the world be all mopey now, can we?”

Your fingers hovered above Bakugou’s head. The gum moved under your command and floated in the air. You flicked it into the trash bin with ease, and Bakugou murmured a quick ‘thanks’ under his breath. After ruffling his hair, you suddenly remembered something sitting on your shelf. Bakugou stared at the small pyramid of chocolate truffles coming toward him.

“I made these babies a few minutes ago,” you said, eying the plate with a proud grin. “Normally, I do a taste test and then send the gift if it satisfies my expectations. But, I got a feeling you’ll love them.”  

Bakugou’s face was unreadable. You gave him a gentle nudge and encouraged him to take one. He sighed before picking a chocolate truffle; it was warm and soft, the cocoa powder dusting his fingertips. After suspiciously staring at the truffle, he ate the entire thing in one go. His eyes widened as all the flavors exploded at once. The crushed red pepper flakes, the hints of rich cinnamon and orange zest, and the bittersweet dark chocolate made from the finest quality found on Earth all danced perfectly together with every bite. 

“So…” You placed the plate on the desk, watching Bakugou swallow the truffle down. “What do you think? Give me your honest opinion! Don’t sugarcoat it, haha! I’m on fire today!”

Bakugou turned away. “I’m leaving.”

“No, wait!” You hugged his bicep with a pout. “I’m sorry, I’ll stop. Just tell me if you liked the chocolate truffles.”  

“They’re good.”

Your smile grew. “Good enough to be your favorite?”

“Sure,” he smirked, shoving another truffle into his mouth. You cheered on the spot after weeks of constant failures. Of course, some of the complaints were nonsense which didn’t surprise you. Bakugou was a picky bastard; the lollipop fiasco served as a great example. You were glad he thoroughly enjoyed the chocolate truffles.

Before you walked away, Bakugou pulled you close to him and crushed his lips on yours. He caught you off guard, but the surprise was certainly welcomed. You soon melted into the kiss after tasting the rich dark chocolate and spices on his lips. Bakugou’s arms snaked around your waist as your hands gripped his broad shoulders.

“You know,” Bakugou’s hot breath tickled your right ear, sending shivers down your spine. “I think I got a new favorite candy.”

“Is that so?” You hummed, a coy smile plastered on your face. 

“Let’s hope it satisfies your sweet tooth then, Ground Zero.”

“Oh, it will.”

After all, you were the one and only Candy Master.

As always, thanks for reading!

10.18.20 UPDATE: Story’s sequel, Gold Coins and a Gold Heart now uploaded. 

[ectogeo-art]

For the WIP ask, emma? Is it at all related to the Austen novel?

WIP ask meme

It absolutely is!! :D The fic’s going to be called "comedy of manners" (after the literary genre, thanks to @cemetrygatess for the suggestion ^_^) and it's a straightforward fluffy bantery Elim Garak and Julian Bashir’s Book Club getting together oneshot where they discuss Emma. The inspiration was that I rewatched Clueless, and then I needed More so I watched Emma (1996), and these movies both just gave me such Garashir feelings that I was like okay I have to make them talk about this!!! (While watching I def had in mind the knowledge that Una McCormack’s The Crimson Shadow mentions Garak’s enjoyment of Emma. This is the only fact from beta canon that I wholeheartedly endorse lol. Thank you, Una McCormack, for being so galaxy brain!)

I’ve already fully drafted the fic and passed it by two beta readers (thanks @delicatetrashstranger and @cemetrygatess for your feedback!), and now I’m in the midst of some extensive revisions to make sure I’m doing justice to their literary analysis, and to make sure that I’m putting forward a compelling argument that Garak would truly Love This Shit.

A fun bonus thing that prob won’t make it into the fic (both because idk how I'd work it in and bc I'm unsure about whether it only happened in the movie lol): In Emma (1996), there’s a scene where Emma and a friend are trying to get some kind of gossip/information out of someone and they just kind of sit there staring at him until he nervously fills the silence, and while watching it I was like lmaooo okay so just like Garak interrogating Parmak! XD 

Okay here’s the start of the fic (including some newly rewritten stuff that I haven’t had a chance to show to my readers yet, so any inaccurate literary interpretations herein are solely my own fault lolll):

“So, what did you think of the book, my dear Doctor?” Garak asked, as soon as they’d settled in at their usual table in the replimat.

Garak had enjoyed reading Emma by Jane Austen much more than any of the previous books Julian had selected, but he was loathe to admit that aloud. Despite his best efforts to conceal his true opinions on literature, it seemed Julian was gleaning something from all their lunches together, because Garak found that each new book Julian picked was more and more suited to his tastes. It was terribly embarrassing (and somewhat exhilarating, too) the way that Julian had now targeted him with such laser precision.

“Oh no, you have to say what you think first,” Julian said with a coaxing smile, “because no matter what I say, you’ll just disagree.”

“I can’t believe you would imply I ever say anything I don’t mean,” Garak said, with mock offense.

Julian sighed. “Please, Garak? You know that I enjoy our debates and little disagreements as much as you do,”—(Garak’s heart pounded in his chest. You couldn’t possibly enjoy them as much as I do, my dear.)—“but I promise there’s a good reason why I want to know your honest opinion.” He ducked his head and smiled. “Humor me.”

Garak acquiesced, intrigued by the mysterious statement. “Hmm. Well, I found it quite refreshing to read about characters who grasped nuance and subtlety. I enjoyed having to tease out the unspoken double meanings hidden in every interaction. ”

“Yes, I thought you might like the way they dealt in riddles and subtext,” Julian said, his grin broadening.

Garak couldn’t help but feel his anxieties melt away. Seeing Julian smile—making Julian smile—was one of the few indulgences that made exile even remotely bearable. Ever since the implant had been switched off for good, he’d taken to self-medicating with his dear Doctor’s smiles and laughter instead. Just as addictive. Just as palliative. Just as deliciously dangerous.

“But I think you missed the point that everyone’s obsession with decorum and leaving important things unsaid caused all kinds of unnecessary miscommunications! I found myself often just wishing they would speak plainly for once instead of only implying what they meant and just assuming that their conversational partner would pick up on their true meaning.”

“Oh? And is that a problem you have to deal with often, Doctor?” Garak said innocently.

“Constantly! Usually right around lunchtime. Or whenever I need a pair of trousers repaired. Or whenever a certain someone is avoiding going to the infirmary despite not feeling well.”

“Now look who’s talking around something instead of stating it outright,” Garak teased.

“Just trying to keep up with you,” Julian said warmly.

[prisonhannibal]

hi, I love your art. and as a beginner I wanted to ask you how did you develop an art style and how did you learn to draw so well

Hi! thank you and I'm so glad you're starting to draw <3 you've just given me an opportunity to rant about something I have a lot of thoughts about so sorry if I'm incoherent.

I feel that thinking too much about art styles is unproductive and can be bad for your enjoyment of art.

I used to sit down and tell myself how I wanted to draw and try to decide on ways I'd draw specific things like eyes etc and then try to practice that. That was never helpful for me and trying to force myself to draw in a specific way that wasn't natural for me was limiting my work and killing my motivation. I only got an "actual art style" when I stopped trying to force it, because that was when I let myself build on the talent I have instead of forcing something that wasn't there and getting nowhere. The most concrete advice I have is look at art a lot, reading comics is what made me start doing a lot of the shading and texture in the lineart.

Art styles aren't a thing, talent or a product, it's just a combination of habits. The only way to get one is to draw a lot and build on those habits. It should come naturally instead of forcing it, not only because I don't think forcing it works for most people, but also because making things should be fun! that's the most important part. I PROMISE that if you draw enough you're gonna notice an art style showing up, idk how long it'll take but it WILL happen because thats how practice works with any skill. I didn't think consciously about my art style, I didnt really realize mine was like recognizable until people pointed it out to me lmao. tbh the way I wanted to and tried to force it to look isnt even remotely close to the way I draw now, but I love my style and I have fun working with it! It literally will come to you!! and thats why youre gonna love it because its yours!! and its a representation of all the joy and hard work art gives!!!!

Art is a PROCESS. every single drawing you do gets you one step closer to a really great one you can make in four years. even if the one you make now isnt what you would like it to be, that means you're done with that one, and you're one drawing closer to one you actually will love. and as with all things, doing something over and over strengthens the habit and creates new ones = art style.

None of this will ever be finished, it's always on going and thats the beautiful part! Stressing about getting an art style implies there's a destination to get to, when you're actually always making an art style, not having one.

[probablynotsamantha]

My god it's just dawning on me how badly I've fucked up. I know that there are tons of people who go through community college and I'm going to a pretty good one and this doesn't reflect badly on me as a person or anything, and of course my situation could always be worse, but damn I have fucked myself. I have no friends here, making friends has always been kinda hard for me, and it's sure as hell not helping that all of my interaction is going to be happening via Zoom. If I'd just been able to make myself do the fucking work I'd have much better grades and could probably have gotten in just about anywhere I wanted. If I'd just done more applications and college research I wouldn't have relied on two schools I probably didn't have the grades for. If I'd just made sure to send my SAT score to UMD instead of assuming that the form where they ask you to self-report your SAT score was good enough, maybe they'd have been willing to look past my GPA. If I'd just fucking done anything even remotely approaching the bare minimum I'd be going to college with friends. Instead I'm alone. All my friends are posting on their instagrams about how excited they are to go off to college and be with their friends and peers and I'm stuck living in this shitty household where I get no acceptance and have basically been forced back into the closet and I just feel so lost and hopeless. I had my early teen years taken away by depression and anxiety so bad I would just refuse to go to school and I don't even know why. Now for my late teens I get all that plus the consequences of my own actions and my parents not accepting me being trans.

Why didn't I just stop being such a lazy piece of shit and just do the work like everyone else. Sure, I spent all my time watching YouTube because life was intolerable when I wasn't distracting myself, but even that felt empty. I needed help so badly and I just never got any. It wasn't available. All I got at Norwood was being yelled at for not doing the work, and at Blair I got that and also some "well I understand it's hard but there's really nothing I can do about it, I'm sorry". I clearly needed help but there just wasn't any help available. Of course my parents were just find sending me to a class designed to help develop my social skills when I was 5 (being 5 i didn't really understand it and I have very few memories of it but I do remember it being stressful at times and looking back on it it seems kinda like a "here's how to speak neurotypical" class, which while helpful for the world we live in it doesn't make it any less disgusting that I was taught helpful strategies to make eye contact with people (take a step back if you're uncomfortable) instead of respecting the fact that eye contact made (and still often does make) me uncomfortable. That was just fine, but both I and my psychiatrist had to pester my parents for several years before I finally was able to get into therapy again, i had tried therapy before once but did not have a good experience, how much of that was me being like 10-12 and how much of that was actual issues idk, also they had some sort of diagnostic process also which I think is how I got my autism diagnosis which I don't even really know if I have because my parents didn't explain anything of what was going on to me, just that I was to talk to this doctory person every week (I knew vaguely it was therapy but nothing beyond that) and the only reason I know of that diagnosis is because it was on a piece of paper I saw my psychiatrist holding that appeared to be a list of my diagnoses (at least I can't think what else a piece of paper with my name on it and a few other things I knew I had could be), which of course means I constantly doubt that I actually saw that because surely they would've told me, and surely it would show up on my Sibley portal under diagnoses (even though that doesn't show several other things I know I have been diagnosed with), and also I'm nervous I would get in trouble for reading that because it wasn't at all clear it was something I was allowed to read (though it did have my name at the top so I assumed it was fine). But recently my parents were talking about going through that testing I did when I was 10 or whatever again (they gave a reason that wasn't entirely clear), and they said something about not entirely believing the results and so now I'm fairly convinced that I did indeed get diagnosed but my parents just refused to believe it because there's no way their child could be autistic, just like there's no way their child could be trans. But yeah, even despite all of that I should've just done the work instead of feeling sorry for myself, and then I'd be ready to go off to college with friends instead of being stuck alone. The thing that really gets me is that I might never fucking see these people again. I can't stand that. I never got to spend enough time with them while I had it because I was always busy or unable to make plans or couldn't do something because my parents wouldn't let me and now that opportunity might be gone forever. Except for the bunch that are at UMD (and even that isn't exactly close), the closest friend I have is in Princeton. They're people I would gladly spend the rest of my life with, and now some of them are over TWO FUCKING THOUSAND miles away. I don't know that I can cope with that. I just... my heart is broken. I remember not really understanding why it's called a broken heart either, but holy shit my chest hurts so fucking badly it does kinda feel like my heart is broken. The idea of never seeing the people who I care about the most again feels just terrible. There's also the whole problem with classes at MC, like there just

aren't really that many classes that interest me, and the fastest way to get me to not do work is to have me be bored out of my mind. All of that isn't even counting all the struggles I have with being trans and having my parents be unaccepting and my sister not being great either and neither are neighborhood friends tbh (though the latter two may be because we are often around parents who are shitty).

Oh and just to make everything worse my bed is full of ants because I'm a fucking slob and can't be bothered to keep my bed clean (the fact that I left half a pizza crust there in my haste to leave for vacation a week ago probably didn't help).

Earlier I was genuinely contemplating just packing a bag and leaving. Problem is, I have nowhere to go. Part of me wants to just hop on a plane somewhere and get a shitty job and start a new shitty life. Another part of me just wants it all to end. It's not like there's really any difference to anyone if I'm dead if we weren't ever gonna speak again. I wouldn't ever actually kill myself, but just the fact that it occurred to me is terrifying. I just don't see any way the future could possibly be even remotely enjoyable.

I need to live in a world that has help for people like me and I just don't.

[cinnaminsvga]

Holo... Numver 60 with namjoon? Hope your writers block will go away soon! Have a nice day. Bye~~

premise: “you look like you could use a hug.” genre: fluff, canon compliant?? || wc: 1K+ a/n: i told myself i’d never write reader insert canon compliant fics but yenno... might as well try everything once?? idk it’s 4am i haven’t slept in 24 hours rip

Namjoon’s brain feels like it’s going to explode. No, scratch that—the tense is wrong. Namjoon’s brain felt like it already exploded.

His studio looks like a set for a WWII movie. Scraps of paper everywhere— balled up or otherwise, 20% of which were filled with rejected lyrics and 80% of which were finished sudoku puzzles. Take-out boxes, half-empty iced americano cups, his laundry from three days ago when he had showered at the office: he felt like he’s swimming in his own filth and failure.

This is not unexpected: The toil and trouble of pre-comeback season means more hours spent staring at a blank screen than anything remotely enjoyable for Namjoon. The bags under his eyes could very well be designer, and Namjoon contemplates selling them to a crazed hipster fashionista (read: Hoseok) for OOTD inspo, but he wouldn’t even make it two steps out his door without collapsing, so that plan is buried and gone. He could, instead, maybe order more jjajangyeon for a snack. It’ll be his fifth snack within the last six hours, but whatever. That, he supposes, is something he could accomplish at the very least.

This is not expected: It is 4 in the morning, and the last thing he expects is for a knock to come from outside his door. 

It takes too long for Namjoon to respond, mostly because his fatigued brain mistakes the rhythm for one of his samples from two days ago. Also, he’s really lazy right now and he desperately hopes that whoever is behind the door would go away and leave him and his suffering artist self alone. 

“Please don’t come in. I want to die alone, please,” he pleads. “Let me enjoy my lacklustre melodies and limp beats for another hour at least.”

But of course, the universe refuses to listen. Or rather, you refuse to listen.

“Kim Namjoon, this is an intervention,” you greet, the door opening with a bang when you finally manage to pick it open. You brandish your bobby pin with a smirk, much like how a heroine might wield her sword to face a dragon to save her one true love, which in this case was a semi-incoherent boy shaped like a ball of anxiety. 

Namjoon glowers at the pathetic excuse for a lock his studio has, once again wondering why Yoongi-hyung had managed to persuade their manager to install a hi-tech number pad for him. Curse you and your lock-picking skills.

“I’ve come to get your ass to bed! A real bed, by the way. Not this stupid couch you bought for 10 million won from an artisan furniture maker,” you huff. "Girlfriend’s orders!”

“Y/N,” he sighs, slumping onto his desk. He hits his head accidentally, but he’s too fuzzy to even notice the growing lump on his forehead. “I am going to turn into dust soon. There would be nothing left of me to bring to bed. Leave me here to join my deceased creativity.”

“I could always borrow a broom from one of the janitors,” you shrug, skipping over to him. You poke him in the side boob. He wiggles for a moment, but not as much as you had hoped. “Earth to Joonie? You in there bud? Marco?”

He can feel your gaze burn the back of his neck, but his head feels to heavy to move and face you. “Polo,” he manages to mumble back. He can feel himself drooling onto the table, but he can’t bring himself to care. He knows he’s being a giant baby about this, so he might as well act like one. “No, I am not in here. I am everywhere. I feel like Scarlett Johansson in that Lucy movie. Like I’ve unlocked 100% of my brain and I’m traversing through space and time.”

You nudge him gently to his side so that he wouldn’t suffocate himself to death. He takes a deep breath, humming thankfully. “I highly doubt that, because if you did, then you would have finished this album weeks ago.”

“That’s harsh, buddy,” he pouts, glaring at you. Which normally wouldn’t be effective anyway since he’s as intimidating as a newborn panda, but it’s even worse now that he looks the part, too. 

“Buddy? Geez, didn’t know you were getting this bad if I got demoted from girlfriend to buddy,” you snort. You begin plucking off the trash from his desk, whistling both in horror and admiration at the sizeable spill that had somehow solidified into a large hulking mass beside his keyboard. “Joonie, I know you’ve been holed up in here for a minute, but I sincerely hope for my sanity that the white stains are from carbonara sauce and not something else.”

“I honestly don’t know, and I don’t feel like lying if I knew anyway,” he sighs. He begins the torturous motion to straighten his back, his spine popping like an EDM beat. He melts back into his backrest, looking up at you with sad, tired eyes. “Help me?” he whines, lower lip wobbling for extra effect.

You roll your eyes, but the smirk on your face tells him that you’re amused and not actually annoyed. He’s normally not this dramatic, and you both know it. Perhaps he’s been spending too much time with Seokjin lately, or more likely, it’s you who has been spending too much time with his hyung, and indirectly rubbing off on him in the process. 

“Need me to call an ambulance? Get you a wheelchair? Subscribe you to Life Alert?” you ask.

“No, I’m good. Just gimme a moment to... recalibrate,” he says, closing his eyes. Wow, have his eyelids always been this heavy? Maybe he could doze off a little and you wouldn’t notice...

“Namjoon, you’re snoring. Wake up,” you lie, but time doesn’t feel real to Namjoon right now, so he could have fallen asleep for ten days and wouldn’t have known either way. You gently cradle his cheeks, massaging his face into weird positions for your own amusement. Then, “Okay, buddy. I’m gonna lift you now.”

“You can’t,” he mumbles sleepily. You push his cheeks together until he looks like a puffy goldfish. “Yow a toofpick compawed tew me.”

“True,” you hum, but your arms are already wrapping around him. He sags into your touch immediately, only just realizing how much he misses this, misses you. Misses human connection, and not just his hand cranking his junk. He nuzzles into your neck, sighing in relief. 

“This is an excuse to hug me, isn’t it?” he says, but he doesn’t make a move to pull away. Neither do you, queen that you are.

“You just looked like you could use a hug,” you say, rubbing his back. He smiles into your skin, kissing you chastely there. 

“Thank you, my love. I kinda needed that,” he yawns, pulling away far enough to kiss you properly on the lips. “Love you, Y/N.”

“Love you too buddy,” you smile, pinching him lightly on the cheek. “C’mon. Let’s get your tired bones to a bed.”

[feistypaants-archived]

False Positive [Chapter 1]

Rating: T+/M Words: 1,555 Pairing: Kristanna Summary: When things don't go according to plan and Anna finds herself alone and pregnant, she looks to her sister's best friend, Kristoff, and almost makes a huge mistake.

[Chapter Index]

Where To Read: [AO3] | [FFN]

Notes: Ummmm... should I be starting a new multi chap? Probably not. But here we are. It’s... idk. It’s still vague! Hopefully I don’t... mess up or write myself into a hole lmao!!!!

Title from @faerytold who is a blessing thank u

Enjoy!

Anna took a deep breath.

The room was cold and quiet except for the dull echo of children screaming in the lobby or other rooms or maybe even somewhere else in the building, and she could feel her heart pounding hard enough to break her ribs. Her fingers twisted together around the tissue she had been holding since she walked through the waiting room doors. Tears had started days ago and had yet to stop.

Maybe she had jumped to conclusions. Maybe she was mistaken. Hans was stressed with work, and brought that stress home, and that caused Anna to be stressed… and when she was stressed she was late! She was late all the time. Maybe not three weeks, but…

She sighed, dabbing at her lower lashes again, willing her eyes to just stop watering for a few minutes. 

A part of her had been ecstatic when she took the first test. She’s always wanted a big family, and an engagement had to be just around the corner, so what was the harm in starting early? But then another part of her thought about their plan. They had a plan, and having a baby right now was definitely not a part of it.

Hans was always very uptight about following plans.

So she took three more tests. Waited a few days and took four more.

Positive, positive, positive…. And more positives.

When she told Hans, he froze. 

He was at work, texting her about how rough his day was and how he couldn’t wait to get home and see her (and do other things to her). So she thought maybe he would like a little surprise! So she stopped at the store, got a little balloon and a card that had a dumb little joke on it - You’re One Cool POP, with a popsicle drawn in the O - and then went right to his office. 

He smiled when he saw her, ushered her into his office with a sly smile, and kissed her silly before she had a chance to hand him the card and balloon. 

And then he saw it, and his whole demeanor changed. 

“What is this?” He asked.

“I… I’m pregnant,” she smiled, her eyebrows slanting down with worry. “I… thought you’d like a pick me up —“

“Pick me up?” He dropped the card to the desk. “Anna, we’re not even engaged. How stupid are you?”

“I…” 

“Aren’t you on the pill?”

Anna nodded, tears starting in her eyes. “Yes but—“

“Did you forget to take it? You’re always forgetting!”

“No!”

“This isn’t the plan, Anna,” he sneered, sitting down hard into his desk chair. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“But,” her voice was quiet, as she stood still, attempting to make herself as small as possible. “We want kids, don’t we?”

Hans sighed, pressing his hand against his forehead. “Not unplanned.”

They argued more, his face growing red and hers getting paler as his voice rose and hers fell to barely a whisper, until he told her either she got rid of it or he was gone, and she cried and left and went right home and packed up her stuff and went to her sisters’ apartment. 

And then she ignored his calls until he left her a voicemail saying he was done with this childish behavior, that she was stupid if she thought she could raise a baby, especially alone, and he’d send the rest of her stuff over as soon as he could make the time for it.

But those little sticks could be wrong, right? What really was in your pee to make them so damn accurate? They could pull up false results… right? So Anna decided it was better to go to a doctor and get it all sorted out professionally. She hoped she could go back to his home and show him that it was all a big mistake! That he could take her back now! That —

There was a knock on the door and Anna at up straighter before telling the doctor to come in. She opened the door with a smile, and Anna’s stomach dropped. “Well, congratulations, Anna. You’re indeed pregnant.”

Her eyes welled up with tears and she couldn’t bite back the smile that stretched across her face before she jumped down from the table and wrapped her arms around the doctor. “Thank you,” she cried, happy crying mixing with sad sobs as the other woman hesitantly hugged Anna back.

“I can’t tell if these are happy or sad tears,” she chuckled, leaning backwards from Anna. 

“A bit of both, I think,” she admitted, wiping at her nose with the heel of her hand. “It’s complicated.” 

“Well,” the doctor nodded, handing her another box of tissues. “Take all the time you need. All your paperwork is upfront at the desk. I’ve also given them a bunch of resources for you, for whichever direction you choose to take.” She smiled sadly, shrugging. “I’m here if you have any questions, or want to talk, okay? I know it can all be overwhelming.”

Anna nodded, accepting the tissues gratefully, and was more than thankful she had been relatively honest with the doctor from the get-go. She seemed kind and sweet, like someone Anna could trust, and she was sure she made the right decision when she saw all sorts of pamphlets and recommendations for all the options she could possibly think of.

By the time she got back to Elsa’s apartment, she was completely worn out. She had sat in the parking lot and cried, drove home with her most emotional playlist blasting, and now she wondered if she finally had gotten all of the tears out of her body as she looked at her red and puffy face in the mirror. 

Looking around, she didn’t see Elsa’s car anywhere and sighed with relief. At least she wouldn’t have to face her sister just yet. 

But then she noticed her sisters’ best friends’ beat up truck in the lot and tensed. Why was he here when Elsa wasn’t? 

Wiping at her face again, Anna decided that her bed was all that she wanted, and she could probably just breeze by Kristoff. He was probably out on the balcony or fixing something in the apartment anyway. He probably wouldn’t even notice her.

She took a deep breath and sighed, pushed herself out of her tiny two door coupe, and made her way up to the apartment. She unlocked the door slowly, and tensed when she heard his familiar, deep voice, shouting at the television. 

“Oh, come on, you idiots! That was clearly roughing!”

A loud bark followed his shouts, and she opened the door to him laughing as his dog jumped up on his lap. 

“Geddoff!” He hollered, pushing his mutt off his legs. “You’re not a lap dog and you know it!”

Anna froze when his brown eyes turned up to her, and willed the tears to stay in her eyeballs until she made it to the back bedroom. “Oh, hey!” He started, smiling up at her. But his grin dropped when he looked at her face for a moment too long. “... You okay?”

Her eyes widened and she laughed, waving a hand in front of her face. “Oh, you know,” she mumbled, stepping into the room and closing the door while kicking off her shoes. “Typical female after a breakup. Cry, cry, cry.” Forcing a chuckle from her mouth, Anna pushed her hair back from her face before noticing he wasn’t laughing along with her.

“Do…” Kristoff shifted uncomfortably on the couch before muting the television. “Do you want to talk about it?” 

Anna smiled affectionately. There was always a little awkwardness between them - she was just his best friend’s annoying little sister ever since they were in middle school - but she appreciated the effort. He always tried to include her. In fact, he was probably one of her favorite people in the world. But she still didn’t want to burden him.

“Oh, god no,” she laughed, hanging up her coat. “Enjoy your game.”

Kristoff stood up abruptly, almost knocking over the beer he had clearly let sit until it was too warm to be enjoyable. “I can change it… If you want to — I mean,” he stammered, his cheeks flushing. “If you want some company we can watch something else or…” he ruffled his hair between his fingers. “Just… I know you don’t really like to be alone.”

Feeling her whole face soften, Anna nodded after only a moment of hesitation and sat down beside him on the couch. She didn’t even mind that he took up so much space, especially when he draped his arm over the back of it, behind her shoulders, wordlessly offering her some physical comfort if she needed it. He picked up the remote and started flipping through the channels, finding something she might enjoy. 

He found a movie he knew she loved, and sat the remote down with satisfaction.

Anna looked up at him, her heart feeling full, and scooted just an inch closer, tapping the back of his hand with her fingers. His arm lowered over her shoulders, and pulled her a fraction tighter. Her feet rose up to curl under her on the couch, and before she knew it, Anna had started to doze off on his shoulder, pushing closer into the warmth of him.

And then a stupid, stupid idea started to bloom in her head.

[merrysithmas]

you may have talked about this before but do you believe boris already knew he was queer and first approached theo bc he liked him or that he started crushing after they developed a close friendship and theo was what made him question his sexuality? i think theres reasons to believe either side- boris being bold enough to cuddle him in bed seems like he was making a move but him suddenly “loving” kotku seems like an impulsive move out of fear bc he realized he might like a boy. oof idk

I think Boris knew he was attracted to boys — which is evident by his playful, charming, almost teenaged-desperate pursuit of Theo. I think he probably inherently knew this about himself for a long time. I think Boris has always been physically attracted to boys since he’s entered puberty and since he’s still a young teen it is kind of a fun, funny, interesting, enlivening thing for him.

He’s never had a stable life and despite being all over the world he’s led an extremely sheltered existence in a certain way with only one terrible person as his constant (Vladimir). Boris lets it slip to Theo that everywhere the miners go they are hated — this includes Boris. Boris is hated by the public everywhere they go. So long as he is part of their unit, he is hated. That is mortifying to intelligent good-natured Boris. That is why he learns to slip out and around, to be so personable and friendly. His world travels have not been so glorious but probably rather extremely lonely and isolating (as with Judy in Canada), hurtful, and damaging. That is why Bami and Judy (and eventually, Theo) stand out to him so much — people who were kind to him in a childhood of isolated misery and directionlessness. Boris has no moral hang ups about his same-sex attraction - why should he? This directionlessness in his key developmental years is also a good thing: He never grew up around any sort of organized belief systems or stayed bound within an orthodox culture for too long for it to indoctrinate him as its own.

I think people really underestimate how incredibly remote and friendless Boris’ life must have been. Boris is a cheerful boy who Theo says is often plagued by black moods and sullen attitudes. He is an abused and secluded child dragged from location to location with literally no love or stability and constantly brutally beaten to the point where it does not even phase him. Boris actually equates love with that abuse — and nonchalantly claims his father loves him. That is painful to read, that amount of damage.

Living with a bunch of derelict miners whose leader was HIS FATHER (so surely then mostly assholes) and who are “hated everywhere they go” Boris has probably seen any NUMBER of things a conservative-minded person would (likely often erroneously) see as “morally unacceptable” — it’s like Boris is traveling the world with a crew of pirates. He’s probably seen drinking, all kinds of drugs commonly used in front of his face. He has esoteric knowledge about drug use that a child of his age should not — so he was taught by the miners: roll like this, dont include the stems, never mix this, tuck snuff like this, you can get this kind of drug here here and here, it isn’t safe if it doesn’t look like this. His young child’s mind eager to learn sucked up this black information from men who probably didn’t have a second thought to a child or what his developmental needs were. He’s probably first hand witnessed sex workers copulating with his father’s crew (how else would be have learned about the opportunity to lose his virginity in an Alaskan parking lot to a sex worker?), definitely thievery, and said he saw his father murder a man in the mine once and cover it up. Boris’ mind is full of a lifetime of this morally shadowed behavior being presented as normal, or at least secret but common.

I think he understands his attraction to boys in this same way. I think he feels it isn’t “appropriate” to share with Outsiders but it is something that Happens, something that is no one’s business but his own, and something that brings him pleasure and happiness and therefore something he will look for. However he knows it isn’t common or visible or “appropriate” to be showy about it in front of others — especially not people who could judge him (kids at school), kick him out (society), or hurt him (his father). Boris treats his attraction to Theo like his other vices and “bad” habits - barrels head first — but secret: deep dive into happy drug use (but don’t show his dad), steals everything he ever needs (but don’t let them see, put it in my coat), lies when it suits him (lies to Xandra and Larry and his father and Theo too), happily sleeps with Theo and has sex with him (but this is between you-and-me).

He knows other people might have a problem with his actions — but he does not. So that’s his hangup there. He is aware of and ever-vigilant of his surroundings. School: a safe place isolated from his father. He is free and happy to do what he wants at school — including crush on and go after Theo who he clearly likes. He thinks Theo is cute, flirts with him, tries to get him to notice him, talks to him after class, sits next to him on the bus, begs him to come over his house, tries to impress him with far-flung stories, gives him alcohol because it’s what he’s seen his father’s men do in pursuit of romantic partners or as a bonding ritual with one another.

Theo’s house is also a safe place. So safe in fact that Boris starts to leave behind some of the maladjusted development of his childhood and become more of a happy, clear-minded person. Boris and Theo suffer from arrested development and one of themes of the book is childhood lost. They are forced to mimic adults either knowingly or unknowingly, and act in ways that children should not have to in order to survive this Adult World alone. With one another they begin to heal from their traumas, their affection for one another the catalyst. Theo cooks for him, talks to a babbling eager-to-talk Boris (imagine how few people have listened to or understood the ideas of a smart boy like Boris, often surrounded by oafish alcoholics, his violent father where he is expected to keep quiet, or cultures where he does not speak the language), Theo sleeps next to him willingly, he likes Boris, a boy from New York (the top of the world!) he think Boris is funny and smart and worldly, shares his dog with him, hangs on his words, becomes his companion, cares for him if he drinks too much, tried to tend his wounds, welcomes him gratefully into his broken family, watches his favorite movies with him, celebrates holidays with him, inherently values him — and so starts to mend Boris’ broken heart.

A lot of things and viewpoints Boris has are clearly repetitions of things he has heard his father or the miners say — “Christmas is for children” (of course they’d say that to a tiny Boris longing for the magic of Christmas as a child stuck in a mining camp watching the peripheral joy of children around him and coming back to bleak hunger and a dark home), or “god yes I loved having sex with her” (about his hooker in the parking lot — Boris then says he knew she didn’t enjoy it and never shows enjoyment but rather avoidance towards women and girls in any genuine way afterwards, yet covets Theo’s physical company).

Theo on the other hand, who for a short while and then so painfully ripped from him, grew up with love. His natural disposition in Vegas comes from a place of being so recently loved and cherished by his mother and he here, in this lonely place, turns the focus of this disposition onto the one person who is kind and protective towards him: Boris — his one light in a life that has turned very dark. This is like an alien world to Boris. Lonesome and neglected Boris is touched and startled and soon changed by this kindness. So much so that Theo, unknowingly, alters the rest of Boris’ life (Boris feels Theo saved his life).

So that is why I believe the Kotku Gay Panic came about. After their climactic Vegas pool scene where their abuse and trauma is opened to one another (their wounds from their fathers, from fire, literally pouring into the purifying chlorine of the watery womb - mother - pool as they try to drown one another, angry at their attraction to one another, but then cling to and save one another instead) Boris begins to not just have fun and have sex and have freedom with Theo (all okay things by Boris’ standards as long as it is secret) — after that scene and they sleep together and Boris satisfies that teenaged human sexual need... they continue to hookup and be at bliss for a very long, happy time where they both begin to psychologically heal— Boris doesn’t just have sex and fun with Theo, he realizes he starts to love Theo.

Love - an extremely foreign concept to Boris who literally freaks the fuck out because he has no baseline for it. It isn’t the type of “love” that his father gives him (violent, untrustworthy), it isn’t the type of “love” the men who grew up around valued (cheap parking lot sex), it isn’t the kind of “love” his idol Larry has with Xandra (Larry lies to Xandra all the time), it isn’t the kind of “love” Boris has seen in his favorite movies (men and women over and over). No, this love with Theo is very very scary to him. Very perhaps dangerous. He doesn’t know.

I think Boris accepts his physical attraction to men as nbd. I think he probably feels most people feel such attractions or some other harmless private desires that certain people may see as an aberrant from “normal” for whatever reason (either typical kinks and silly hush hush sex shop porno stuff - or other far more despicable things he’s witnessed his father’s men do) and so thinks nothing of his own innocent, consensual goodtime-centered desires. Boris, who likely grew up with little exposure to healthy LGBTQ representation and has a very isolated POV in some ways, likely to some degree at the Vegas point in his life (however casually self-accepting he is) equates same-sex attraction with hush hush taboo sex activities — nothing to be ashamed of, but you’re not going to tell your dad.

As long as it is a personal thing, for him only, Boris embraces it. But it is the emotionality, the healing, the care, the love that freaks Boris out and makes him make a run for it to Kotku — only to recede to what he knows and repeat the exact kind of fake “love” he was taught by his father: unbelievable exclamations of devotion (Boris’ dad sobbing and telling him he loves him + “I love her I love her! She’s beautiful and perfect!”) coupled with the black truth (Boris’ dad beating the shit out of him + Boris beating Kotku).

Boris knows he likes boys but when he starts to love one — that’s when he runs away. Because that means something totally different: societally and personally.

[xcziel]

i have to say, i have tried with the MXTX danmei novels (at least, the english translations) and personally ... i just can't

idk if it's the translations themselves (because everyone says the writing is so good in chinese, so something might really be getting lost) or just the style, but they are not enjoyable for me personally to read

the wording is clunky to me, the descriptions dry. there's just so Much stuff that's ... pointless (to me) ghost story/early-episode-of-Supernatural type of events, seemingly just plopped inside the plot? with one or two elements of relevant character or plot information scattered within? i'm guessing possibly this may be due to them being serialized web novels (got to keep people interested chapter to chapter i suppose)

and then the parts where i could really do with more authorial involvement or descriptions are rendered with: "and then that happened" and no more? again, this may be the unspoken genre conventions that i'm not aware of as a western reader, but if that's the case i feel i can be excused for going: wtf?

a character "ascended to the heavens"? um, how exactly? could you describe this process other than "there was a great disturbance that shook the foundations" and then totally side-tracking into petty disaster reparations? how does the character feel? bc all they actually seem to do is shrug and go "oh, okay whatever"

for stories with such high stakes and deep emotions running rampant, there's ... such a lack of affect? and i don't know if that's a cultural thing, a translation issue, or me just marinating in fanfic for so long, but honestly, reading a description of something that would be unimaginably painful happening to a character, but them going, in text, "oh. well, it was justified that happened i suppose. i guess i don't feel it anymore" leaves me literally like "???"

to my reading, the characters are opaque, it almost seems an issue of telling rather than showing. they perform impossibly romantic actions, enact modes of devotion and revenge, but there's no examination of their internal psychology. even inner thoughts are somehow rendered as passive, almost remote? it's like books full of cql lan wangjis. people talk and perform actions, and i'm meant to interpret their emotions purely from that, which is certainly a valid way to write, but i feel i'm not able to properly describe how ... distancing? how ... textbook-like? it makes the stories feel for me

it's like i thiiiink i can see where parts of the novels are deconstructing tropes that are almost sort of invisible outlines of things i've come to expect in fandom reading, made clear more from the spaces left by their absence, so i can guess at the author's intentions there. but unfortunately the execution is what i'm actually left dealing with, and it's ... not something i would ever read by choice? if i picked these books up off the shelf in a local bookstore (maybe they had a really great covers), i'd read the blurb on the back, flip through a few pages, see the rains of blood or the chatty disembodied heads, and put them back down again

i'm not even seriously addressing the sex scenes bc people have made it very clear that those do actually conform to genre and cultural conventions, however irksome they are personally to me as a western reader (they really do read like a straight female's version of gay sex, though. as though they were written het, and then she just switched a few things and the pronouns. the different translations change things considerably between them, but that part still really comes through)

and like these aren't just fantasy stories, they're ghost stories, they're very much Horror stories in aspect - there's far more curses and gore and gross spooky shit that seems to be there just for the sake of being gross and spooky as far as i can tell - than like the 'magic' magic a western reader might expect in a supernatural fantasy. MXTX's writing (or possibly the xianxia genre?) to me has a lot more in common with japanese horror than say, the dresden files or tolkien

and i know part of that is the culture: everything's related to spirits, reincarnation, ancestral honor or debts, and clearly that's why the genre doesn't map directly to the western idea of supernatural/fantasy stories, but like, i still, personally, hate horror stories? i don't care about ghosts either. buzzfeed unsolved and blair witch and the ring leave me equally cold.

so for me, the part of The Untamed featuring gorgeous people in amazing costumes being utter badasses? improbable fight scenes, mystery-solving, and heart-wrenching romance? yes yes yes, a thousand times yes!

the curses, creepy eye-sacrificing, tongue-slicing, flesh-eating, revelling in zombie/ghost/creature skin-crawlingness? a very big no thank you on my part. most especially on the written page

(they toned down a LOT of that in the adaptations)

tl;dr the MXTX books may be the basis for an amazing tv series and adaptations, plus the plots/characters by themselves are iconic and fantastic worldbuilding, but me trying to read through the translations is like making myself do homework, and i have enough other media waiting on my time and attention that fighting to read in a genre i don't normally care for is just not worth it.

i'm sorry mdzs purists, i can understand the frustration of endless bad takes, but fandomers pick and choose their canons, and a lot of us chose cql as the starting point. we're not doing it to be obtuse or obstructive - it's literally just the version that is most satisfying to engage with for some. no hard feelings okay? we all just want to enjoy ourselves, after all

(i mean, i've never read the lord of the rings either and i don't regret it. i still enjoyed the movies)