#whilst all the while pretending to the reader that he is neither

[girlfromflor]

previous | part 3 (final) | pack!141 x omega!reader, who has a backstory with simon.

their first attempt at trying to make you and ghost get along wasn’t quite successful as they hoped it would be, but slowly they manage to make you and simon share spaces more often – like the living room, or even hanging out in johnny's room without complaining – and have some quality time together. you’d exchange small words and only when necessary, but that was already a big win. it got easier and easier to plan something bigger. it wasn't until a whole month of their not-so-subtle attempts that things finally felt right  – more than they ever expected it. john listened and watched his boys with all the care and attention in the world and decided to take matters into his hands, like the pack alpha he has always been. he decided to make a proper dinner night with everyone included, a way to have the moment all of you have been needing to reassure the new dynamics that have been settling within the pack, but also make it a way for you to properly talk with ghost for the first time. you’ve been living with them for a few months now, how could you not spend much time as a pack? – he knew you weren’t exactly a pack yet, but he’d make sure that didn’t last long. 

so, that’s how you found yourself sitting between kyle and johnny. they work well in keeping you entertained as john goes to simon’s room to call him so you can all eat together. john had cooked with your help whilst you all engaged in light talking about your lives – or rather, theirs. ghost would pass by once in a while, not wanting to be the “killjoy” in the room. you’d always be polite towards him, quietly bringing him as a subject within the conversation or even directly addressing him – which he answered with a three word sentence and a shrug, most of the time. once john is back he settles on the other side of the table, sitting across from you and the betas, and ghost takes his side. the dinner goes by smoothly, you and the alpha who seems to despise you less and less often used having a mouth full as an excuse to remain in silence, but neither of the others seemed to mind.

it was the very first time you all felt like things were in their rightful place, and that started to happen more and more frequently. simon would ask things about you – he even started to ask about you to the boys like “where’s she at?” or “what’s she doing?” – and you would do small things, like when you were making tea for everyone and ghost’s was particularly stronger because he said once that that’s how he’d take his tea. little exchanges of words turned into full conversations, the cold – hesitant – interactions turned into genuine smiles from you and playful remarks from him. you started to make it more clear that you saw him truly for the person that he was showing himself to be, and not only for his callsign and skull mask. and then, in one random ass day, you find out – or, more specifically, he tells you – what his name is. you all but cry right as the words slip through his mask-covered lips. 

“are you… are you serious?” is all you can speak, the words coming out weird like they’re not even your own. the tone in your voice is so serious he thinks it wouldn’t be a great idea to make a lame joke to lighten the mood – like he grew used to, getting back a bit to being the careless teenager he once was.

“yeah… why?” he answers, dark brown eyes trying to take in what you’re expressing through your features because he can’t smell anything from you – something he started to hate, he thinks to himself.

“uh… just, something i told kyle once–” you cut yourself, feeling emotional. great,  now not only you’d think about your lost friend when you’d stare into ghost’s eyes, you’d have to call him by your friend’s name too. you quickly realize that it’d be less painful to call him ‘ghost’, but you also thought that maybe you could play pretend sometimes, giving in to the longing that plagues your mind from the friendship you never got to have closure from.

simon only hums, showing that he’s understanding even though he’s not sure what he should think about it. so instead of wondering and feeding unlikely possibilities in his mind – overthinking, but he will never admit it – he goes to kyle. on the very same day he finds himself knocking on the beta’s door, after ensuring that you were cuddling johnny on the couch.

“come in,” kyle calls from inside. as simon steps inside he can see kyle moving on his bed to sit up. “oh, si…” he says, sounding a bit too surprised before questioning, “what do you need?”

“just… i told my name to her today…” he starts without much ceremony, watching as kyle shifts in his position almost as if he's physically uncomfortable. interesting, he thinks.

“did you, now? what’d she say?” he asks, trying not to seem so worried. he was afraid you had fallen into anxiety’s arms like it usually happens when you have a nightmare.

“nothing, really… just looked at me like i was lying, even asked if i was serious.” he replies, honestly. he watches as kyle reaches to grab his hand, pulling him closer until they are sitting side by side on bed. “and then she mentioned you. so i thought maybe you knew something…”

kyle stays silent for a moment, thinking if telling simon would be something you’d be mad about. he brings their hands to his lap, brushing simon’s knuckles with his thumb in a tender manner before speaking, “she had a best friend in town when she was younger, and he was named simon…” he can smell the alpha’s discomfort, but he keeps talking. “she said that she was still a teenager when they saw each other for the last time. said he ran away.”

simon heart stops in his chest. the beta can see the sorrow that burns in his skin, so he projects his scent to try and calm him down. simon is as still as a stone – thinking what he thought was impossible –, but after a few minutes too long he manages to voice out his inner turmoil. “i… i don’t think i ever told you that, but i had a friend too, back where my parents left me when i was younger.” he glances at kyle, who is patiently listening, before he adds, “she was an omega, and i left her behind… that’s why i couldn’t bring myself near her, y’know?”

the younger man only nods, happy at the confession despite its heavy background. they sit there sharing soft caresses while kyle decides to make a confession of his own. “you don’t think it’s possible… that it is her?” he questions carefully, not wanting to overstep a boundary, but simon’s reply catches him off guard.

“yeah…” his voice is gentle, almost a whisper. “i mean, i’ve only thought about it after today... just don’t want to–” his voice cracks, but he clears his throat pushing the fear away. he shakes his head as he speaks, “i can’t be wrong, kyle.”

“we’ll get through this, si. all of us.” is his answer. he hugs simon’s shoulders and the alpha allows the warmth that spreads within him at the motion.

it takes exactly one day of researching your past for simon to make up his mind and decide that it is time to see this though. he had gathered enough information – things you’ve said to them along the months – to know that it was you. he waits until you’re in the couch with john and johnny, watching a weird tv show they seemed to share a deep interest in. he steps inside the living calling for kyle to join them, who comes from the kitchen a second later. he stands there looking at you and you sit up straighter on the couch. you don’t have time to question what’s wrong because – after getting elbowed by kyle – simon starts talking, very nervously so.

“so, uh… i– this is not a big of a deal,” he lies, but they all ignore it. you have your eyes focused on him. “just, god, i’ll just take my mask off and, uh– yeah…”

he’s so awkward you almost want to laugh, but you don’t because that seemed too mean of you. you watch very intently as he steps closer to the couch, not even realizing that john and johnny were standing up. simon’s hands reach for the hem of his balaclava, and suddenly you grow very nervous, curious and a bit apprehensive. i swear, you think, that if they look anything alike i’m gonna lose it. it was enough that the simons had the same eyes. you take in his slightly chapped lips, blond eyebrows and very blond hair. the long healed scars here and there adding a dangerous charm to his features. much to your dismay, you realize way too quickly that they do in fact look very much alike. so much so, that ghost seemed simply an older, scarred version of the boy you held so much fondness for – wait.

“oh my god,” comes your breathless voice. the words stumble out your lips before you can stop them. “simon…?” you say, uncertainty clouding your thoughts before you watch him nod in his own hesitation. you can’t deny it nor ignore the realization that washes over you, your scent masking drops completely as your hands come to your face. and that’s when it hits him, he can smell you. “simon…” it’s quiet for a moment. john watches the scene unfold from where he stands near the entrance to the living room, kyle and johnny moving to stand beside him as they eye you and simon. it made sense that simon wouldn’t have remembered you immediately, he spent way too many years trying to push away the memories of you – the memories of his mistake. but you? you tried to keep the same memories with all you could, because that was all you had.

and poor simon is so lost. he expects you to back away, to maybe even run and lock yourself away in your room out of pure disgust. or maybe you’d scream at him, intoxicate the room with the smell of your disappointment, wrath and sorrow. you could push him, slap him, punch him – whatever, any harmful reaction would’ve been welcome, because it was you. god, it was you, it had been all this time and he blindly avoided you like a plague. if you didn’t hate him enough before you must certainly do now – except, you don’t. nothing could’ve ever prepared simon for your reaction. he can see it happening but he doesn't acknowledge it until you're drowning in your tears. soft sobs and hiccups leave your lips as you bury your head in your palms. your shoulders shake like crazy and they’re all certain that you’re not breathing at all in between your silent crying. that is, until your eyes seek simon in the room and there’s not a single drop of distaste in them. not sadness, not anger, just pure adoration and bliss, the delightful sensation that he’s alive and he’s okay and he’s here. right now, in front of you – not in a nightmare, not in a dream. you move before you can think and when you realize you’re already on him, but all you do is rest your forehead to his chest, arms limp on your sides – like you always did when you were just two awkward teens trying to get through life.

“thank god,” you whisper and it’s just so broken, soft and gentle but so fucking filled with emotion that it drowns everyone in the room. john’s arms come to rest on each of his beta’s shoulders, johnny is already crying and kyle is blinking away the tears as they watch you and simon.

“bloody hell…” simon mumbles, his eyebrows furrowed and there’s a confused little pout on his lips. it’s the first time he gets to smell you without any restraint from you or him, and he lets himself drown in the moment – he allows himself to truly savor this, because he’s sure he’s about to wake up. “you’re alive…” he moves slowly as if to not startle you, right hand resting on your waist as the other finds its place on the back of your head. his nose brushes on your hair, taking in your scent but it did nothing to conceal his craving. so the hand on the back of your head dips to your nape, the very tip of his fingers come to brush down your neck with such tenderness that it leaves a trail of thrill tingling down your skin. you tilt your head slightly, giving him permission to continue and he is so very glad you did, because not even a second later he's sinking his head, nose finding your scent glands like he's a man starved – and you let him, fingers curling on the fabric of his shirt just enough to wrinkle it.

it takes a while for him to step away, his eyes teary and unfocused for a moment before he slowly drops to his knees for you to do the same. your hand leaves his shirt to find his shoulders, balancing your faltering weight on him as you sink your head towards him. you press your face on his scent glands and god, it just made so much sense now. he smells the same, just more mature and a bit aged – just like whiskey – and it has your eyelids fluttering close immediately. when you straighten up and look down at him, there's a new sense of fulfillment taking place in your heart. you reach for his arm, urging him to get up and as he complies, you turn to your boys – your sweet, patient men who had put so much effort into this.

you don't have to say anything. before you can let out a single word johnny is on you, arms hugging your waist as he pulls you to him. you giggle and let him have you for a second before your hand finds the back of his head. you guide him gently to your neck and you can hear the gasp that falls from lips as realization washes over him. he's not as gentle as simon – too eager to finally finally scent you – as his nostrils open to take in as much of your scent as he can. his head rubs on the skin of your shoulders and neck before he backs away and you roll your eyes at his antics. when you move to scent him, his head is already tilted to the side and his reddish eyes are closed, his breath hitches when your nose touches his skin, he couldn’t believe this was happening. his scent is familiar of course, but to be able to smell it directly from the font has you a bit dizzy in his arms.

kyle watches as you disentangle yourself from johnny’s grasp, your eyes find him instantly where he's standing with john, who you glance over right after. it's john who moves first, offering his hand to you which you gladly accept. you move until your back is lightly touching the alpha’s chest. kyle is right in front of you, eyes roaming your features and your hands find his chest, your nose pressing on his collarbone over his shirt and then on his jaw. once you press further to have better access to his skin he puts a hand on your hip. it stays there when he moves to take in your scent, grip tightening as he pushes past the lingering of johnny's scent to seek yours. he leaves a soft peck on your neck before moving you, the hand on your hip urging you to face john.

it's very fitting, really – the fact that simon had to be the first to scent you, while john would be the last. he lets kyle hold you by your hips, his own hands find your cheeks where he leaves a soft caress with his thumbs. then something changes a bit, he does the same thing johnny did, rubbing his face on the juncture of your shoulder and neck – his beard a bit more than just ticklish on your skin –, before his nose found the spot on your neck where your scent was strongest. he's clearly hesitant to let you go, so instead you pull him closer, projecting your scent so he'd feel surrounded by you – at the point, all of them would. you take advantage of the hug-like position to bury your face in his neck – your back pressed on kyle’s chest letting him know that he is a part of this moment just as much as you or john. you stay like that for a moment before you move away, and it reminds you of the very first night you spent in the flat, where you and john squeezed kyle between you two until sleep got the best of you.

when you look for johnny and simon, you find them sitting on the couch watching you. and as you savor your very first moment as a pack, you relish the fact that you wouldn’t trade this for anything else in the world – and neither would them.

a/n: was this rushed ya'll? i don't know, i have mixed feelings about it, let me know what you think. uptade | taglist: @camcvpidd @fruitymoonbeams-blog @throwing-up-butterflies @yearninglustfully @faggotinie @theo-the-danger-mouse

[klausysworld]

I know it's a bit random, but I just had an idea for a Klaus story, which is that Reader goes on a long trip with Klaus and his siblings but they only have one car and Reader has to sit in Klaus lap due to space constraints. Reader and Klaus are kinda friends because she is Elena's little sister, but he often confidently flirts with her, but when she sits on his lap he unintentionally gets hard and that makes him super embarrassed. She notices and he apologizes quietly, trying to make sure his siblings don't notice + smut in the end

According To Plan

The mikaelson's originally ruined my life. They crash landed into an already chaotic town and destroyed it. First Elijah, then Klaus, then Rebekah, then Mikael, then Kol, Finn and finally Esther.

They put my sister, Elena, at risk all of the time and rarely cared about anyone but themselves. They didn't even care about each other...well I thought they didn't.

Klaus and Elijah scared me for a while and put me on edge because I knew I wasn't significant enough to keep alive but when Rebekah ended up out of her coffin and in town, she seemed to take a liking to me and that got be sucked into all of their family drama.

It started because I was the only girl in school that didn't just pretend she wasn't there. Despite her having a clear hatred toward Elena, she hadn't actually done anything harmful at that point so I didn't see why we were being cruel to her first.

I didn't expect to become her best and only friend in town after that day.

Rebekah hadn't ever laid a threatening hand on me, never spoke low of me or used me for information. She genuinely wanted a friend and I could feel that. I wasn't gonna turn her away because she was Klaus's sister, not until she did something that made her awful.

So I stuck about, helped her pick a homecoming dress which she didn't even get to go to which I was not happy about and neither was Klaus which he made abundantly clear when he accused me of hurting her.

I found her a while later in Damon's dumbass basement, knew I couldn't just wake her up without consequences so made a deal with Klaus. Bex's safety for Jeremy''s safety so I could justify it to Elena and her gang. He went with it and everything worked.

Until this stupid fuck decided to stick her back in a coffin and wait it out.

Shit went down when all the Mikaelsons were up and about. Bekah had me at the mansion the night after her siblings and mother were woken. Klaus and Kol were constantly bickering whilst Elijah looked paler than...well paler than usual and very anxious but Rebekah just shrugged it off. She was just happy to have her mother.

And also to throw a ball.

I was forced to get tailored and have a colour theory assessment to figure what colour, style and fabric my dress needed to be. Elena had always been my mother's focus, she was her miracle, her eldest. So Elena got to have her hair styled, nails done, dresses designed and I would sit at home with my hand-me-downs and Jeremy's toys that I'd steal. It was kinda nice to be dressed up and pretty. I had stared in the mirror for so long, picking every detail apart trying to decide if I loved it because it was me or loved it because it wasn't really me at all. That's when Klaus appeared in the doorway.

"Everyone's arriving, love. Rebekah's downstairs greeting people and waiting ever so eagerly for her dreary date but she wanted me to make sure you came down." He explained the situation and I nodded, taking a breath and heading out the room, brushing past him as I did. The door was pushed shut and he fell in step beside me. "You look gorgeous by the way." He muttered and I rolled my eyes.

"You practicing your lines for when Caroline gets here?" I asked and he let out a breath.

"No, I meant it." He argued and smirked to himself as he took my arm, pulling it to wrap around his own and 'helping' me down the staircase.

"Sure you did. But I wouldn't say 'gorgeous' to Caroline. She already knows she is, pick something a little less common." I muttered and his brows furrowed.

"Like what?" he questioned and I shrugged.

"I don't know...maybe like....ravishing" I whispered, dramatically and sarcastically as we got to the bottom and I let go of his arm, spotting Rebekah looking moody. "Good luck" I gave a thumbs up and he hummed.

"You too."

I won't lie, I did laugh when I overheard him actually call her ravishing. Rebekah didn't get it and just complained about how great Caroline looked, to which I just scoffed and told Bex to go look in the mirror and get a reality check.

The whole dance thing came around and I ended up starting with Kol which was way too funny, he would not stop. Klaus did not look amused when we swapped partners and I was spun into his arms next.

"Believe me, love, Kol is not that funny. You're over selling it and inflating his ego." He complained, a level of bitterness in his tone which I was not expecting.

"I'm sorry, have I offended you by laughing?" I asked, scoffing softly as he pulled my waist closer.

"You haven't offended me." He muttered and that was that.

Tense night guys, tense night. Not as tense as Bekah's though when she wound up in Damon's bed. Thankfully, I woke up in my own.

After that night, there was no way I was getting away from that family.

In a few months Rebekah was a better sister to me than Elena and a better friend than the ones I'd had since kindergarten.

So when everything went down with the cure, I wanted her to have it so that she could live the human life that she had always wanted.

I cried for Kol's life when I came home to his remains on my kitchen floor and Klaus trapped in my living room. Caroline and Tyler didn't say a word as I scraped his ashes into a box and in return I didn't give any argument when Klaus bit Caroline. Instead, I just sat on the sofa opposite Klaus, staring into space as I waited for my phone to light up with some good news from Rebekah, hoping she had the cure for herself after Klaus had revealed that there was only one dose.

Faintly I heard Caroline mumbling about Klaus being in love with her, that made me laugh and dying or not, she didn't like that.

"Oh come on...I mean, he's like a thousand years old Care. He wants to fuck you, he likes the chase because when he finally gets you it feels like a win. You think a dance and a date is the same as love? What's Tyler then? Your soulmate? Is Matt too?" I was taunting a reaction really. I was still mad about Kol, we had become pretty good friends and the others new that and didn't care in the slightest. So yeah, I wanted her to hurt. I wanted all of them to hurt but Caroline always made it clear that she was better than me so having the power in that moment felt especially good.

When Klaus finally gave her a drop of blood, she was storming out of my house and dragging Tyler. Klaus only gave me a look and head nod of some sort of understanding before he gestured to the seat beside him and I moved over. I stayed against him until the barrier dropped and he was able to sort his shit out.

Rebekah didn't get the cure, Silas went crazy on everyone and life fell to fuck again.

Just when things got a little better, Rebekah came bursting through the door.

"You will not believe what my twat of a brother has gone and done!" She yelled, eyes wide and borderline shocked.

"Klaus?"

"Obviously! You won't even believe- hybrids can reproduce!" She revealed and I choked on nothing.

"Woah- wait. What has he done now?" I asked and she nodded enthusiastically.

"He got some wolf girl pregnant! They're in New Orleans right now. Keeping the baby! Elijah's there too, convinced they'll be some happy family." She muttered and I stared, completely gobsmacked.

Took a week but eventually she agreed to go too and I was beyond curious as to how this was gonna play out so took my place and kept by them.

People were dying left right and centre, wolves and witches and vampires. It was a war zone 24/7 until the day Hope was born and pronounced dead only she wasn't dead. Never had I ever been so tired. It was like a never ending game of tennis, whacking problems back and forth non stop.

And yet, somehow, no matter who had just been slaughtered, Klaus would have a comment to throw at me. Whether it be as simple as "Who are we all dressed up today for?" on a random Tuesday or as vulgar as "Christ love, do you want the whole city tearing that dress off?" when Bex and I were heading out for a fun mnight.

Touching also became increasingly common. Hands on my shoulders when he's stood behind me or my hips to keep my still. Waist if I needed to be stuck at his side, like if there was a threat, and arm with his whenever there was a dance even when I wasn't his date.

Rebekah had made many comments, Hayley too but I was a firm denier. A very firm denier for years. Years.

Hope grew up to be a far to aware child. In fact she asked at least a dozen times if I was her second mommy because her daddy and I were in love. When I told her we weren't in love, she would raise both brows and say a very sarcastic "Okaaay, whatever you say." And leave me speechless every damn time.

Even Kol was laughing. Wasn't having it.

But that stupid trip was definitely a set up. Not just by Kol or Bekah or Hayley, every single last Mikaelson and their fuckers.

Hope wanted to see the grand canyon. Somehow it became an entire family holiday/trip/plan situation to go to Arizona for a week, maybe visit California and blah blah blah.

We had two five seater cars. And somehow eleven people were going.

The car situation needed to be considerate of how many hours we would be in the cars and how likely arguments were.

"I'm not being in a car with Kol for over twenty hours." Klaus protested immediately and Davina nodded.

"Please don't put me in a car with Klaus." She muttered whilst Kol just grinned.

"I wanna go with Auntie Bekah and Auntie Freya!" Hope chimmed in and both sisters laughed in agreement.

"I can drive one of the cars?" Keelin offered and they nodded.

"Woah, wait." Hayley shook her head. "If Rebekah's there, where's Marcel? He can't be with Klaus or Elijah if we want to make it there without screaming."

I just stared, there wasn't enough space and I technically wasn't family and I wasn't dating or married to anyone there so I was ready to just stay home.

"We can drive with you, Elijah and Klaus?" Keelin replied to Hayley, reffering to both her and Freya who nodded.

"Yeah, then Kol, Davina, Bex, Marcel and Hope can go together and Hope still gets Bex. We can swap around halfway? We'll need to stop and sleep at a hotel or something anyway." Freya summarised and everyone nodded before Rebekah's eyes fell on me, I just shook my head at her to tell her it was fine but once we started our silent conversation others began to take notice.

"Y/N, you'll be in the car with us" Hayley said as though it was obvious.

"Sure but there's no room. You, Elijah, Keelin, Freya and Klaus-"

"Why's my name last?" Klaus interjected and I rolled my eyes.

"-There's ten seats and eleven of us. It's fine, I can stay here and you know...water the plants and stuff." I muttered, glancing around at the neglected, very dead plants.

"Of course not, you have to come." Elijah argued and I was slightly surprised it was him to say anything first though we had gotten closer over the years.

They all started mumbling between themselves before Kol just piped up.

"Oh come on! Just sit in my lap darling, you know I wouldn't drop you" He winked and Davina smacked her lips before delivering a swift smack to the side of his head and relishing in his yelp.

That's when everyone's eyes darted to Klaus.

"Just...sit on Nik's lap." Rebekah shrugged and I was ready to slap this bitch.

"Really, I'll just stay here and see the pictures." I backed out and Klaus frowned.

"What's wrong with my lap, love? You didn't protest to Kol's. I'm a much better option and much safer than a seatbelt." He defended and I sighed.

"Klaus-"

"No, it's decided. You'll be with me."

And that was that. Nothing I said was even heard after that, by anyone I swear.

Which was how I ended up telling Klaus that I was not sitting on his hands.

"Oh don't act like you wouldn't love to feel my hands holding that tight-"

"Klaus. Finish that sentence and I'm gonna smack you before sitting on Elijah's lap." I warned and he shut his mouth with a cocky smirk on his face.

Keelin was driving, Freya in the passenger, Elijah at behind Freya, Hayley in the middle cuddled up to the suited original and Klaus sat behind Keelin with my begrudgingly on his lap. His arms were wrapped round my body acting the same as a seat belt and also forcing my back to be against his chest after I tried to just perch on his knee and he called me ridiculous.

I lasted fifteen minutes of him whispering teasing comments into my ear about other ways we could end up with me on his lap before I had my headphones on to block him out.

We planned to do a stop at the services after five hours, less if Hope needed to use the bathroom or got hungry for something other than the snacks.

I got comfy after the first hour, letting myself relax against him and enjoy the drive. Three hours in he got fidgety and I paused the song to try ask what he was doing but then I felt it.

I don't think he knew my music had stopped when he cussed quietly and tried to move his hips back a bit. I wasn't sure whether shifting would make it better or worse as his cock only seemed to be getting more prominent against my ass.

I glanced to the side, seeing Hayley and Elijah both with headphones in and watching a film on an ipad before glancing up front to Freya and Keelin who were singing along to the radio up front.

Slowly I reached and pulled my headphones down around my neck and cleared my throat softly. He tensed against me and sucked in a breath.

"You okay?" I whispered, making sure to keep quiet and he placed his hand against the side of the car, pushing himself up to sit straighter but it just felt lift he pressed against me more.

"Fuck- sorry" He muttered, his voice breaking a little and he sounded weirdly panicked.

I expected him to make a flirty comment like normal, maybe even get touchy but he was actually...embarrassed?

"It's...okay" I murmured and pulled myself forward so I wasn't touching his crotch. "It's not long till we stop now anyway" I told him as I glanced at the sat nav.

We stayed like that for a while before some cry pulled in front of us unexpectedly and Keelin had to slam the breaks. I felt my body go forward before Klaus's arms pulled my straight back against him before my face could hit the back of the seat in front. My hands grabbed onto his arms as my heart rate spiked with adrenaline and my breathing sped up.

"It's alright love." he whispered against my ear whilst Keelin called an apology back to us. We stayed pressed right against each other regardless of his hard-on.

By the time we got to the services Klaus had nearly thrust his hips at least six times.

He went straight for the bathroom when we got there while I headed for the McDonald’s queue with Hope and Kol.

By the time we were getting back in the car, Klaus looked rough,.

Face pink, eyes refusing to look anywhere other than straight and had most definitely not resolved his problem. That was clear when he sat back down in the car and grimaced to himself.

I sat back in his lap and bit down on my lip. The others hadn't gotten I yet, they were swapping Freya and Keelin for Rebekah and Marcel with high hopes for no tension before we got to a hotel.

"Is there anything I can do to-"

"Please don't offer anything right now." He whispered, his jaw clenching making me hold a laugh. I sighed and turned round in his lap to face him.

"It's not a big deal" I told him and he frowned.

"It's embarrassing and we still have hours." He muttered. Honestly this was the perfect opportunity to tease him like he does me usually but he was actually stressed.

"Klaus, I don't mind. It's flattering, really." I told him gently. "Besides you can't help it, I'm just great." I shrugged and he smiled.

"Mhm, you're irresistible love." he chuckled and I hummed.

"Exactly, anyone would get turned on with my tight ass on their lap." I tease, using his words from earlier to make him laugh but it also made his cock twitch beneath me. My eyes glanced down and it made him shift. "Did you try to uh...get rid of it?" I asked, referring to when he ran to the bathroom.

"I tried to." He mumbled and turned me around so my back was to him as the other doors opened and Rebekah slid in beside us, grinning brightly and leaning over to hug me.

We chatted for the majority of the second half, Bex complained that Kol wouldn't stop singing in the other car and so on. Klaus's hands would clench every now and then if I moved too much or the car jolted but that didn't happen very often with how sensibly Elijah drove.

We got to the chosen hotel a full thirty minutes later than the others because Elijah wouldn't drive a single mile faster than the speed limit.

When we arrived we were only handed three room keys. Kol had gotten himself and Davina a room, Keelin and Freya room, Bekah and Marcel, and then another double bed room and a family room. Hope wanted to be with her mom so she came out of Freyas to go with Hayley and Elijah to the family room and Klaus and I had to share.

It would have been a whole lot less awkward if he hadn't had his erection for the entire day pressed against me but we powered through. Rebekah could be heard giggling to Marcel when they closed their door, waving at me with cocky smiles.

Klaus went straight in the shower so I put the TV on to drown out whatever he was doing (we all know what he was doing). He came out over half an hour later, face still pink as he glanced at me. I couldn't help but look and much to my surprise his cock was still pressing against his sleep pants.

"Klaus-"

"I don't want to talk about it." He mumbled as he got in bed beside me and rolled to face the opposite direction. I sighed quietly and went to the bathroom to get into my travel pyjamas before laying down next to him. The bed was definitely only a queen, we were pretty much touching the whole time no matter how close to the edge I was. I stared up at the ceiling for ages. It was so dark that I could barely see anything but I could tell that he was awake too, especially when he moved round to face me. I turned my head to look at him, my eyes squinting to make out his face with the tiny bit of moonlight that slipped past the curtains.

The silence was loud when his forehead pressed to mine and his eyes closed.

Thoughts come much easier when it's late. All ideas seem like good ones.

So I didn't really consider what I was doing when my hand slipped down to his crotch. He grunted softly when I cupped his bulge through the cotton. I looked down, watching my hand slip under his his waistband.

"Love..." He whispered before a groan left his lips when my fingers wrapped around his cock. My teeth bit down on my own tongue as I took his thickness into consideration. It was so quiet beside his heavy breathing as I stroked him firmly, his arm went around me and pulled me right up against him and his face nuzzled the crook of my neck.

It definitely wasn't a position I thought I'd end up in when this trip was planned but I couldn't say I wasn't enjoying it a bit. I let go of his length and he made a sound that closely resembled a whimper. I licked my hand a few times, coating my skin in saliva before sliding it along his shaft.

"Oh bloody hell" He muttered as his hips jumped up into my hand. I felt my eyes widen slightly at the full feel of him from tip to base. I squeezed him in my hand, feeling a sense of pride at how hard I had gotten him from doing literally nothing.

I felt his hand on the back of my head, pulling me down until our lips pressed together. His skin was warm against min and the sheets ensured that as our mouths moved in sync. His body moved like a wave to thrust his cock back and forth in my grip but I could feel him getting frustrated as he nipped my bottom lip, drawing blood.

I pulled away with a strained moan and squeezed his dick again. "Klaus, you gotta slow down" I whispered but he shook his head.

"I'm close-" he panted, "I just..." his hips kept bucking but I could tell he was struggling.

I opened my hand, letting go of him making him let out an angry cry. I knew he wanted to question me but his words halted in his throat when I moved my lips to his jaw, slowly but surely kissing lower down his body.

He went tense when I reached his cock before both his hands scooped my hair into a makeshift ponytail and I took his head into my mouth. We both took deep breathes for different reasons as he pushed my head down, I could feel my saliva dripping down his length as his head stroked the back of my mouth and teased my throat. I pulled up and his arms relaxed, letting me bob my head along his cock but taking him deeper when he pushed down. My eyes kept closing as I forced myself not to gag. I could taste him getting closer, his tip leaked against my tongue as I rolled it over the top half. His hands tightened their hold on my hair and his thighs tensed either side of me.

He held me down when he came making me gag as warm fluid hit the back of my throat. His hands dug into my scalp and I could hear him groaning as I swallowed it down.

My head shot up with a gasp for air and a soft laugh as he laid back against the pillows taking slow breaths. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and sat up.

I laid back down beside him and silence fell back over us but it wasn't as bad this time.

We must've fallen asleep sometime after because when I opened my eyes it was light in the room and my head was using Klaus's chest as a pillow.

For a second I thought that what had happened was a dream but when I pulled myself up the memories flooded in quickly and I looked down at Klaus who looked all the more ready to fuck me quite simply. Pupils blown, lips parted as he eyed me up and down like a piece of meat.

"Oh fuck." I cursed, running my hand through my hair and getting out of bed. I ignored his presence entirely and went to wash my face and get changed before leaving the room with my travel bag and knocking repeatedly on Rebekah's door.

She finally answered looking disheveled and very clearly just stopped having sex with Marcel but I didn't care.

"Breakfast now." I demanded, grabbing her arm and dragging her.

I wouldn't tell her what happened but she knew something had happened especially when everyone else arrived and Klaus just stared at me. Bekah glanced back and forth three times before raising both brows and sipping her coffee.

He seemed annoyed when I continued to ignore him for the next section of the car ride. So when we got to the services and I headed for the starbucks line, he was ride behind me. His hands were on my hips and I could feel his chest just brushing my shoulder-blades as we stood not so patiently.

"You're acting as though I've murdered your family pet, love." He murmured against the back of my ear making me sigh; I miss when he was embarrassed and quiet. I didn't reply to him and he huffed. "You weren't this rude last night-"

I elbowed him straight in the stomach making him wince before chuckling as his hands slipped round my waist. I wish I could say it made me feel uncomfortable but it just felt right in the most infuriating way. I continued to ignore him as I got to the till and made the order for myself, Bex and Hayley. Klaus got his card in before I could even reach into my pocket and I just went over to the waiting line. He was back on me in a second and pretty much breathing down my neck.

"Why are you being so cold, love? I thought we had a moment...or a few moments." He trailed and I clenched my jaw. He was teasing and it wasn't funny to me. I shouldn't have even thought about touching him like I had. He was my best friends brother for christs sake and I had to see him everyday, he was the worst person to get complicated with.

"You thought wrong." I mumbled and his hand squeezed my hip.

"Don't tell me you help out all of your friends like last ni-"

"Klaus would you just shut up? Last night was really, really stupid." I muttered.

"It wasn't stupid when you had your mouth on my cock, love." He hissed into my ear and I felt my face flush with embarrassment. Hated how the tables had turned.

I didn't bother saying anything else to him as I grabbed the drinks and shoved past him.

Back in the car we were both silent, so was everyone else. The tension was built.

When we finally got to the luxury hotel we were staying in I was quick to go to my own room, refusing help with my case and just going to set up for the next few days.

I'd just had a shower and done my hair when my door knocked. I had a robe wrapped round my otherwise bare body when I unlocked the door and opened it only to push it shut again but Klaus's hand caught it and he forced his way inside. "We have a lot to discuss."

"We really don't Klaus." I sighed as I sat down at the vanity.

"First of all-" He stared and I groaned, "last night was a long time coming. Perhaps not the blow job-"

"Klaus!" I scolded, throwing my arms up knowing that everyone's rooms were just behind a couple thin walls.

"-but the whole snapping of...lets say tension. Lets just be honest love, it's not exactly a surprise that we're attracted to each other." He chuckled and I narrowed my eyes.

"Well hold on. You're attracted to me, you're the one who couldn't get rid of his boner for an entire day. If I hadn't gotten rid of it then I would have had to've dealt with it all day today too." I defended but we both knew it was bullshit.

"Oh? So you didn't kiss me? Didn't look me in the eye whilst you wrapped your lips-"

"Why have you always got to make everything a big deal?"

"It is a big deal. I didn't ask you to do that, I didn't even tease the idea. You wanted it, you did it." He was getting angrier and it was worse because I knew I was wrong but I'd gone too far to succumb to that now.

"You could've just gone to sleep but you turned over and gave me that stupid look!" I argued and he scoffed.

"What look?"

"You know exactly what look. Your eyes do that thing."

His eyes narrowed momentarily and he stepped closer. "Oh? Am I doing it now?" He asked and I rolled my eyes.

"No." I muttered but as I glanced back up at him I could feel his gaze intensifying and the blue of them storming over.

"No?" He tilted his head and reached his hand out to cup my face. I clenched my jaw and stared at him uneasily. His fingers stroked along my jaw gently but his grip was rough as he crouched down in front of me to be eye-level.

"Stop it." I whispered but I didn't really mean it and he knew that so when he got closer and pressed his mouth along the length of my neck my protests were almost nonexistent.

"You've been cruel to me all day." He muttered as his hands pushed the fabric of my robe down. "Cold...rude..." He mumbled as he kissed the skin of my cleavage whilst his hands untied the material round my waist so it fell open.

"Klaus" I uttered, slight resistance in my tone as I become exposed to his eyes. I pressed my thighs together so he couldn't see between them as his eyes dragged down my body. His kisses kept going to my breasts alongside his hands.

"Is this stupid too, love?" He chuckled as he glided his tongue over my left nipple making my nerves light up.

"You have to stop" I whispered and he nipped the flesh in his mouth causing my body to jolt and a gasp leaving my throat.

"Why?" He chuckled

"You're Bekah's brother." I muttered and he fully laughed.

"Don't behave as if I was every just Rebekah's brother." He grinned and pinched both my nipples between his fingers making this a whole lot harder. "That second I saw you, I knew I'd have you. From that ball where you looked gorgeous whether you believed it or not...to seeing you hold my child, feeling you wash the blood from my hands, feeding me your blood when I needed it. You've always been mine." As if to make his point he pressed a kiss to my lips and slid both hands to my knees before pushing my legs apart.

I wave of embarrassment hit me but I wasn't strong enough to close them with his hands there. "I don't feel...gorgeous" I whispered, wanting to hide my body from his view.

"Well you should." He uttered back, a firmness to his voice which held no nonsense before his mouth pressed a series of kisses down my stomach before I felt the heat of his lips on my core.

My eyes drooped slightly at the sensation and my fingers slid into his hair, curling around the soft curls as my gaze met his and his tongue slid out from his soft lips to stroke my clit. He licked at me so slowly, heating my body up more and more with each delicate touch. His hands slide under my thighs and guided my legs over his shoulders so I was barely sat on the chair as his face disappeared between my legs and his mouth clung onto my pussy. My grip on his hair tightened and a series of cries left me.

His actions gained speed and pressure whilst he went. I could feel my lower stomach twisting in pleasure, wanting nothing more than to feel the high I knew he could give me.

As my eyes closed, I knew now why Klaus was as cocky as he was. Any man with this much power over a woman would be as cocky as he. I'd never felt so utterly vulnerable and yet completely uncaring for the consequences at once. The knowledge of the fact that his siblings and our friends might hear fell right out of my head as I moaned his name as loud and as often as I could as my body and mind expressed it's raw emotion to his touch.

My body went back and I pressed my hand to the chair to keep myself up as he buried into my thighs and plunged his talented tongue in and out of me without slowing. Heat spilled from inside of me, rushing into his mouth and fuelling him to suck and slurp. The sound brought an unbelievable surge of want through me; my hips ground up against his face and I felt a deep chuckle leave him and vibrate through me in response before he pulled off of me. He licked his lips and swiped his sleeve over his chin before grabbing my thighs again and lifting me up before swinging me round and tossing me down.

I felt the air leave my lungs as my back hit the bed.

He was on me before I could take a breath and the robe was dragged completely from my body. His hands grabbed my wrists and my arms were pinned above my head. I could feel my chest moving up at down, the only sound I could hear was my breathing. His lips were moving but no sound was coming out until a loud banging sound broke my daze.

Within seconds I had a sheet wrapped right round me and Klaus had me gathered behind him.

"Oh for fucks sake- We're going out for dinner! You could have waited-" Rebekah's voice shrieked and I felt hot for different reasons.

"Would you get out- we're coming!" Klaus yelled and Rebekah gagged making him scoff.

I felt him turn to me but I was just staring at the closed door. His hand rubbed down the back of my body slowly before he leant down to kiss my lips firmly but shortly.

"We'll finish this after dinner, I promise you love." He muttered into my ear before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me off the bed and grabbing my suitcase. "Let's get you dressed and get out of here before I somehow lose my clothes too" He teased.

By the time we got out there everyone was stood waiting bar Hayley, Elijah and Hope. I went to ask but Rebekah just grabbed my hand and dragged me. Immediately I went to apologise but she started before I could. "Oh my god! I mean, I thought the car ride would build some tension but I wasn't expecting it to snap so easily- did you two have sex in the hotel yesterday!? Wait no don't tell me ew!" She exasperated.

"No! We didn't...have..sex." I muttered and I could feel her staring.

"I wanna ask but I really also don't..." She whispered and I nodded.

"Good shout." I mumbled and we kept walking ahead of the others. "Hope-?" I questioned.

"Hayley took her to the restaurant early to check she liked the menu, thank god."

"Oh shut up. This is your fault. You planned this." I muttered.

"Well...me and everyone else."

I love that you can just read my moodswings through this as I just didn’t know whether to make it completely fluffy, angsty or smutty. I really loved the request but I’m not really sure I did it justice

[inthepeakymidwinter]

Cigarettes, Gunpowder, and Whiskey (Thomas Shelby x Reader) (Smut)

*This story is 18+ no minors interact* Summary: Thomas Shelby befriends his maid when he finds her taking books from his library. TW: Sex, Cigarettes, Alcohol Word Count: 4561 (Largest one yet!)

----------------------------------- It’s been the same routine for weeks. I finish up cleaning for the night at Mr. Shelby’s mansion. I pretend to say goodnight to the other housekeepers and then suddenly I’m sneaking myself into Thomas Shelby’s gigantic library. I hover over a million books trying to find the perfect escape from my dull life. My sunken, tired eyes don’t recognize that a man comes walking into the room followed by a puff of cigarette smoke. I turn my head and see Mr. Shelby himself in a long white sleeve Henley with black suspenders to match his black slacks. It finally hits me that I’ve been caught, and I am on the verge of fainting from anxiety. “Having fun?” He asks. I hold my breath as Mr. Shelby walks up and swiftly pulls the book from my hand to read the cover. “Not a good one” He stated.

“And if I happened to like that one?”  I questioned him with a cherry red blush spreading across my face.

“I’ve been aware since you started taking books Y/N…trust me when I say that you would find that one rather boring” He spoke low and soft whilst his thumb lightly caressed my cheek. I looked up at him in awe. If it had been anyone else, I’d probably kick them in the shins but there was something about Thomas Shelby that made me melt unlike anyone I’ve seen before. 

“So…you’re stalking me?” I inquired.

“Only when you’re stealing” He chuffed. “Fair enough…you have any recommendations Mr. Shelby?” I stared at his darkened blue eyes that paired so well with his short dark hair. In the dim lighting he still looked picture perfect, and it was unfair. 

“Quite a few” He licked his lips and walked towards different bookshelves, picking out certain books that piqued his interest.

Once he finished, he set about five books on his desk and went to fetch a whiskey from his mini bar. As he poured the drink I walked over to the desk and looked at the books on the desk. “These seem awfully long Mr. Shelby” I said as I picked through the different books.

=

“Well, you’ll be working here for a while, yes?” He prodded.

I nodded my head and flipped through a few pages of the first book I picked up…Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy. A romance novel. “Romance?” I questioned.

“Something against it?” He implored.

“Not at all, I just…didn’t think you would be for it” I spoke softly.

“Neither for nor against it. It’s honest. It’s secretive, passionate. Loyalty seems to be a big theme” He said before walking over to me and pinning me up against the desk. I was practically sitting up on the desk trying to get my grip together as he leaned in and asked, “You think you’re loyal, Y/N?”

“I like to think so Mr. S-Shelby” I croaked. Thomas nodded his head and stepped back to sip his whiskey once more. Relieving me of the awful feeling of the wooden edge of the desk imprinting on my thighs.

“I’m sure you are… we’ll finish this another night” He claimed and walked out the door with his whiskey. Leaving me in a room full of books to read for the night. I felt like I could finally breathe. --------------

A few nights later, I found myself one night in my bed with one of the books Mr. Shelby suggested, Dracula. It had been keeping me busy for quite some time. I was engrossing myself further into the pages when the old housekeeping bell to my room was going off, ordering me to the kitchen quarters. I walked into the kitchen with my silk night gown on and a long-sleeved cardigan. I was so tired and could barely see in the dark. As I walked deeper into the kitchen, I spotted Mr. Shelby sitting at the kitchen nook with a glass of whiskey by his side.

“Mr. Shelby? Are you alright?” I turned the kitchen light on and walked towards him.  

“Never better…Which book tonight?” He questioned.

“Dracula this time” I said sheepishly.

“Didn’t think you’d be interested in that one…Read it to me?” He requested. I nodded at him with a smile and pointed to the library with a raised brow. He nodded and we both tried not to make the hardwood floors creak as we snuck to the library. I turned back around to face him and noticed a grin on his face.

“What is it” I asked. “I just never thought these books would make anyone this happy. I’ve had them for years and they have yet to be read by someone other than myself” He gushed. “They help me pass the time” I explained and began to get comfortable on the red couch in the library. I tried hard to find my spot without thinking about Thomas looking at me as I flipped through pages. He sat down on the couch beside me and pulled out a cigarette. I found my place and looked back at Thomas who happened to be eagerly awaiting my reading. His bottom lip tucked behind a front tooth as he looked back on me with anticipation. I was jealous his lip couldn’t be one of mine. I shied away from his gaze and focused back onto the book, trying hard not to corrupt my own reality.             "If that other fellow doesn't know his happiness, well, he'd better look for it soon, or he'll have to deal with me. Little girl, your honesty and pluck have made me a friend, and that's rarer than a lover, it's more selfish anyhow. My dear, I'm going to have a pretty lonely walk between this and Kingdom Come. Won't you give me one kiss? It'll be something to keep off the darkness now and then. You can, you know, if you like, for that other good fellow, or you could not love him, hasn't spoken yet."

I read to Thomas aloud with my heart racing. He knew something was up when I stopped reading, he gently put a finger under my chin and brought me to meet eyes with him. “Another romance” He spoke lowly.

“You have a pattern with books Mr. Shelby?” I inquired with a soft blush forming onto my cheeks.

“Only with you” He admitted. I bit my lip and went back into reading, trying not to analyze his words. I wanted more but didn’t like rejection. I preferred to keep my feelings below the surface as much as possible. We spent the rest of the night together reading further into the book and having moments to ourselves. Eventually both of us drank glasses of whiskey and got comfortable enough to be laying on one another. My head resting against his chest as I read, trying to keep my heart from pounding out of its chest. "We want no proofs. We ask none to believe us! This boy will some day know what a brave and gallant woman his mother is. Already he knows her sweetness and loving care. Later on he will understand how some men so loved her, that they did dare much for her sake.

JONATHAN HARKER”  I closed the book and sighed. Another ending. Another time I’m brought back to reality. I got up off of the couch and put the book away onto one of the large bookshelves. Thomas got up right behind me, getting closer as I continued to take a deep breath and marvel at all of the books around me. He placed his arms around my waist, wrapping himself against my small figure. My cheeks began to heat up.

“I think we can call it a night, don’t you?” He asked. I began to sink back into him and breathed in the smell of Thomas Shelby. Cigarette, gunpowder, and whiskey. A scent that is begging for death and yet so intoxicating to anyone near him. It grabs your attention like a lost puppy you see wandering a busy street. He let his right arm free and gently moved my hair back behind my shoulder. I had chills run up my spine. Thomas placed soft kisses against the crook of my neck. It all felt so natural, something I could get used to. “Do you know how badly I’ve wanted you Ms. L/N” Thomas pressed up against me with his hand running up against my breast. I moaned lightly as he kissed up my neck, making me tilt my head to the opposite side.

“T-Thomas” I breathed out.  He caressed my right breast as he gently sucked and bit my neck. Driving me into an unexpecting madness. He spun me around smoothly so I faced him and brushed the hair out of my face, gently caressing my cheek afterward. I looked up at his sauntering blue eyes and bit my lip.

“Don’t do that” He ordered. I let go of my lip and was instantly met with his lips on mine.

I reciprocated his drunken kisses with welcoming lips. He held the back of my head, pushing it towards him more with every kiss, making sure he stayed in control. I fell right into him, and with it I felt a hardening in his pants. He broke the kiss to start taking his button up shirt off and with it he happened to lift up my silk white night gown. Thomas proceeded to kiss me, biting my lip as we’d break kisses to come up for air. He pressed my back up against the bookshelf. His hand slid up my thigh to meet my core over my embarrassing beige grandma underwear. I felt overwhelmed and completely unprepared. His hands guided themselves and rubbed against my clit in circles with the perfect amount of pressure. As Thomas played with me, he simultaneously licked and sucked sensitive spots on my neck that I didn’t know existed. I panted and whined as he kept going faster with each stroke. “I’m going to make you cum more than anyone else ever will” He growled. I moaned louder as he slid between my underwear and I got to feel his actual fingers on my pussy. It sent me into a spiral and I only craved more of him. His eyes grew wide as he heard me squeal. He stopped rubbing for a moment and placed his other hand over my mouth. “You have to stay quiet until I take you to the bedroom” Thomas ordered. I nodded my head, my core flooding as his hand stayed on my mouth. “Good girl” He praised and continued massaging my warmth.

It was a matter of minutes before he used his fingers so fiercely that I felt like I was about to explode. I rocked my hips against his hands, and I felt two of his large fingers slip into my vagina. I almost screamed in that moment, and my eyes squeezed shut. I was met again with the pressure of his hand upon my mouth and all I could do was moan into his hand as I felt his fingers plunged into me. “You like that my girl? You gonna cum, eh?” He asked me as he sped up his pace. I whined incessantly.  His two fingers curled inside of me, hitting my g spot as he kept plunging into me. I moaned harder with each pump of his fingers and felt like I was going to burst. “Cum for me baby girl” Thomas instructed. I felt his fingers thrust faster and my hips rocked up against them until I felt my body clench up around him. I opened my mouth as much as I could and whimpered. “Cum baby” He repeated. It took one more slam of his fingers for my back to arch and release juices against his fingers. I felt so weak and embarrassed, I refused to look up at him. Thomas slipped his fingers out of me and uncovered my mouth. He saw me looking down at the floor and took a thumb to my chin to lift my face up so I was forced to look at him. “You gonna taste yourself?” Thomas questioned my reddened face. He put the fingers that were just inside of me up to my mouth. “Open up” Thomas ordered with a stern voice. I opened my mouth wide and didn’t close it until his two fingers were touching the middle of my tongue. “Suck” He insisted, looking me dead in the eye as serious as possible. I made sure I sucked his fingers as deeply as possible, doing anything to please him. He bit his lip as I did my best to clean his fingers off. Thomas slid his fingers out of my mouth and licked his lips. “Your ass is coming to my bed” He spoke.

“Yes sir” I mumbled with a deep blush spread over my cheeks. Thomas lifted me up by the waist and threw me over his shoulder. I giggled as he walked out of the library and dropped me off in front of the giant staircase. “Go up, I’ll be there in a second” He insisted while giving me a light smack on my ass. I was flustered and embarrassed, feeling the anxiety from the possibility of one of the staff catching me with Mr. Shelby alone.

I walked up the stairs, trying my best not to make them creak. Once I was in the hallway, I noticed a door halfway shut and walked into the room that I hadn’t explored yet. There was a lamp that dimly lit the entire room. I spotted a huge king sized bed covered with pillows, two big dressers and even a large couch in the middle of the room. If this wasn’t Thomas’ room I’d be shocked. I stepped towards the couch and saw another door. The room had no lights on, and the door was once more halfway shut, so I decided to let myself in. I looked for a lightswitch beside the door and turned on the lights. It was a giant bathroom. A large, clawfoot bath tub and a shower besides it.  I smiled to myself, I hadn’t seen a bathtub this nice before. “You should get in” Thomas scared me with his presence. I jumped in my slippers and he fully saw this embarrassing moment. I looked at him with my hand over my heart and he started to smile. “Did I frighten you” He smirked, coming closer to wrap his arms around me. I nodded at him, fully embracing the way he enveloped me in his arms. “I brought us more to drink, do you want me to run you a bath?” He asked me.

“Sure” I agreed. He let go of me softly and began to prepare the water. Once the water began to run, Thomas excused himself out of the room to get some drinks and a towel for the bath. By the time the bath was halfway full I decided to shimmy off my silk nightgown and surprise him.

Thomas came back with a cigarette in his mouth and a glass of whiskey in hand. When he saw my nude body his cigarette fell out of his mouth. “Oh fuck me” He spoke and went after the cigarette that fell on the tiled floor. When he came back up, I gazed at him with a smile.

“Thank you for the whiskey” I smirked and stole the glass from his hand, taking a small sip before handing it back.

“Where have you been, Y/N” He put his hand against my face, stroking his thumb against my cheek. I looked up at him, biting my lip.

“All of the wrong places I suppose” I mumbled out. He ran his thumb across my bottom lip before stepping away, putting the cigarette out on the ashtray conveniently placed on his bathroom counter.

He placed the glass of whiskey down on the counter next to the ashtray, then turned back to me.

“I’m going to do everything in my power to keep you here, eh?” He promised, moving in closer to me. I nodded my head. “I’d like that” I croaked out. He leaned down, crashing his lips against mine for only a single time. Then placed kisses down my neck, onto my collarbone, and down towards my chest.

“You’re a fucking goddess” He hummed against my breast, then began to kiss my nipple and suck gently, swirling his tongue in circular motions. As he went to my other breast, I involuntarily let out a moan and that forced Thomas to look up at me with a smirk. He knew he was doing something right. I continued to whimper as he kissed and sucked on my other breast, but I soon became unprepared as he started kissing down my stomach. Soon ending his rampant kisses at the start of my pussy, I couldn’t bear to hold in another sound.  “You okay?” He asked me kindly. I looked down at him and his perfectly tousled black hair.

“More than okay” I let out. He nodded and continued with his playful schemes.

Slowly he licked my clit and I let out a high pitched whimper involuntarily. As he continued I got more used to the warm feeling of his tongue down on me. I let myself go into the pleasure of Thomas’ tongue and was riding a high that I had never felt before. He licked down my slit, diving into my entrance with his tongue, causing my legs to shutter. Thomas knew I was crumbling and immediately stopped what he was doing. I almost cried at his immediate stop until I saw his pitch black eyes come up from below me. He kissed me immediately and I met his lips with the same immense desire. He pushed me up against the counter behind us and slipped his tongue into my mouth playfully. I followed his movements, slowly dancing with his tongue against mine. Suddenly, I felt his hands against my ass and he swiftly lifted me up on top of the counter. He finished our kiss before spreading my legs with his hands and moving back down between my legs. I cried out as he continued lapping up my wetness, shortly finding myself in the same position I was in earlier. I tried to grasp his hair with my hands thinking he would slow down but that just made him hungrier for more.

“T-Thomas” I cried out but it was no use. I was close to orgasm and he wasn’t fighting me from the deep release. I felt my stomach tighten and knew I was a goner. As I moaned out louder, Thomas began to move his tongue left to right quickly, making me tighten up. “Thomas p-please” I cried again. His tongue was no match for me, and I felt myself cum as he kept licking me. I gasped as he kept licking. He wanted every ounce of juice for himself and all I could do was whimper and cry out to him. He licked my slit once more before looking at me. I was a lousy, panting, naked mess. “You tasted amazing” He licked his lips. “You kill me, Thomas Shelby” I shook my head and smiled. He smiled back at me and stood up. “Want a bath now?” He asked me with his hand out for me to hold. I nodded at him.

“If I can even stand” I giggled, making note of my shaking legs. “I got you, come here” Thomas scooped me up from the bathroom counter, lifting me bridal style and softly letting me down into the warm bath. “I don’t want to…but I’ll let you rest for a minute. I’ll be in the other room finishing up some papers from work. Just come out when your ready” Thomas spoke, giving me a kiss on the forehead and leaving me to be by myself. I didn’t expect Thomas Shelby to be so caring, or even so mature. Nobody has ever given me this amount of care after anything sexual. I lay back into the bathtub, sinking in down to my shoulders, properly relaxed. After a while in the bathtub, I noticed my legs stopped shaking and I was ready to settle down into bed. I popped up the drain for the bathtub and carefully lifted myself up from the bath, grabbing the towel hanging on a hook off the wall.

I wrapped myself and stepped out of the bath, turning off the bathroom lights and heading into the main bedroom. I saw Thomas at his desk, seriously glancing down at his papers with his rounded glasses on. “It’s not all just reading books all day is it?” I asked from the corner of the room. He turned around and looked at me with tired eyes.

“Unfortunately…come sit” He insisted and patted his lap. I nodded and walked up to his desk, I glanced at his paperwork. Tons of papers full of writing, about racehorses, financial audits, and taxes. It looked to complicated for me to make sense of, especially at this hour of the night. I sat on his lap and leaned against his chest. “I do a lot of horse races, and bets…I’m trying to make my family the first legitimate race business” He mumbled out.

“Well, trying is better than nothing” I murmured. He let out a “Hmm” and began to place one of his hands on my thigh as he read a paper in his other hand. The hand on my thigh moved up inch by inch. The further he read his paper the higher his hand went. Thomas turned the page of the paper and slid his hand up towards my pussy. I gasped softly, unprepared for him to want to touch me again. “You need me to fuck you on the bed, eh little one?” He asked me with a deep voice. I moaned out softly as he kept touching me. “You need to tell me baby” Thomas ordered. “Y-yes” I whimpered. “Say yes sir” He ordered again. Rubbing my clit softly, teasing the hell out of me. “Y-ye-yes sir” I struggled to speak as he kept stroking with a steady speed. “Good girl” He praised me before stopping his strokes and lifting me up off of his lap. Thomas removed my towel and stood up. He pointed to the bed and I walked over to it, letting my self sit on the edge. Thomas pushed me down gently and spread my legs. “You okay with another round?” He asked me gently. I nodded my head and saw his eyebrow raise. “What’d I tell you?” He asked. “Yes sir” I told him. Thomas nodded and leaned down, hovering his body over mine. He gave me a gentle kiss on the lips before sliding down towards my core once more. I held my breath as I knew what he was about to do. He kissed down my mound before slowly using his tongue against my folds. I grabbed. His hair once more and I cried out his name. He stopped his licking to grab my wrists and place them to my sides. He held down my hands as he kept licking and sucking on my clit. I was overstimulated and about to burst, but before I could I felt his hands release mine and he came up for air. “You ready for me?” He questioned me.  

“Y-yes sir” I moaned out, gazing deeply into his blue eyes.

“Good girl” He praised once more before unbuckling his belt and sliding his pants off, revealing an enormous bulge in his boxers. My eyes darted from his boxers to his eyes. “See something you like?” He smirked. I blushed hard and slid myself up in the bed. Adjusting my head to the pillow, trying to prepare myself for whatever he was about to put me through. He removed his boxers and sprung his large cock free. I looked back up to him again, but this time a bit apprehensive and he could sense it. “We’ll go slow okay?” He promised me. I nodded at him and he leaned down to kiss me gently on the lips. He smiled into this kiss and began to lock lips with mine. As he did this he also reached his hand down to rub my clit softly, making me buck my hips and squirm against his hardened bulge. He kissed me deeper with each stroke of his hand, slowly entering his tongue into my mouth and having to battle me for dominance. I began to moan into each kiss and with a random kiss he slid his hand away, using it to guide his cock slowly into my pussy. I nearly yelped as his thickness filled my entrance. He pushed further inside of me, giving me time to adjust to the size of him. I moaned more into his kisses until he pulled away to kiss my neck. “You’re so…tight, Y/N…fuck” He groaned as he thrusted into me. Suddenly the pain turned to pleasure and I welcomed every one of his thrusts.

“Th-Thomas…Pl-Please” I cried out as he increased his speed. His thrusts grew faster with each of my moans. I wanted him more than I ever thought I did. He kept steadying his pace, each thrust of his cock made my toes curl and suddenly I felt myself about to release.

“You gonna cum on my cock babygirl?” Thomas asked as he kept thrusting, speeding his thrusts up to match my cries.

“Y-Yes sir” I whined, feeling him bottom out into me.

“Cum for me, Y/N” He insisted as he kept his fast pace. I cried out in pleasure with each thrust. I couldn’t help but to give in to his massive size. My muscles clenched as he pulled out and pushed into me with his full size. I nearly died with his pace. My body started giving in to him, and as he thrusted one last time I came onto him. “Good girl” He kissed my neck and sucked hard, giving a hickey in the process. I panted as he kept going, but this time slowing down his pace. “You’re gonna make me cum, babygirl” He groaned and leaned down to kiss me. This time he bottomed out into me and picked up his pace, grunting with each thrust, I could tell he was close. “Fuck, Thomas” I whined and unintentionally clenched up around him. He grunted harder and bottomed out into me once more before quickly pulling out and spilling himself onto my stomach. His six pack clenched up as he went to stand up off of the bed. I looked at his abs and then back to him. He winked at me and walked towards the desk where my bath towel hung off of his office chair. As he returned, he wiped off his cum off my stomach and threw the towel on the floor.

“Get under the blankets now, princess…Get some rest. You need it” He insisted and kissed me one last time before lifting the blankets up and placing them over me. Thomas then slid into bed beside me and turned off the lamp. I could get used to the feeling of being in bed with this man.   “Goodnight Thomas” I mumbled before quickly drifting off to sleep with him up against me.

“Goodnight, Y/N” He answered, wrapping his arm over my abdomen and cuddling me tightly.

[perpetuallyconfused10]

could you maybe write something where hotch and the reader are the only two awake on the jet after a long case, neither of them plan on sleeping so they sit at the back away from everyone and reader is listening to music whilst hotch does paperwork but after a little while he asks what she’s listening to and they end up listening to music together? i really love your writing, the way you write for the reader is incredibly good.

I'm so sorry it's been so long! Full disclosure, this is very different than what you sent in (aka I wasn't feeling cool and mysterious enough to figure out the right music to use) so this is what we have - thank you so much for your request! I hope this did it some form of justice <3 Content Warnings: Mild discussion of injury/Canon-typical violence (non-graphic), Reader is self-blaming, Written quickly and not proofread, Chess References, Aaron Hotchner quotes Kung Fu Panda WC: 1.2k

A Game of Trust

Footsteps sound from down the aisle. You don’t look up until they’ve stopped, right next to you, and Hotch slides into the seat next to yours. Offering him a weak smile, you bow your head and return your attention to the newspaper in your hands. 

He doesn’t accept your ignorance as a valid form of dismissal. 

“Are you alright?” he says. His voice is low, likely so he won’t wake the team. Even so, there’s a wariness to his expression. He’s approaching you like he would a caged animal, poised to strike at any intrusion of its engineered peace. 

Maybe he isn’t wrong. You don’t feel quite as far away from snapping as you usually do. 

You nod. “I’m fine, Hotch. Just tired.”

When you bow your head again, the black-and-white symbols on the page blurring just a little, he gently takes the paper from your hands and sets it on the table in front of you both. Even if you were fine before, you aren’t now. 

“Hey–” you say, shifting in your seat to glare at him. He’s as composed as usual, his head tilted to one side as he stares you down. As much as you want to stay angry with him, the concern you think you spot in his eyes foils that plan for you. 

“I think everyone on this team, and probably off of it, knows that ‘I’m fine’ never means ‘I’m fine’,” he pauses. You watch his eyes flicker towards the newspaper on the table and the frown that tugs at his mouth when he spots the unfinished chess problem you’ve been pretending to work on. “Reid’s okay, you know. He is.” 

You follow his line of sight, stubborn enough to try to work on it from a distance. Three pawns, two kings, a rook and a bishop. That’s all there is to it. It’s simple enough, but without Reid’s murmured commentary in your ear, you can’t think your way through it. But Spencer isn’t here. He’s one week into a mandatory leave of six, so you’ll have to solve the problem yourself. 

And you try. If you move the rook to the seventh rank…but that doesn’t work, black’s bishop takes.

Hotch isn’t pleased. He flips the paper over so you’re forced to look up at him. You bought it from the small town the team just closed a case in, as your tradition demands, and you’ve forgotten to rip off the headline. It’s a blaring reminder of the violence you’ve seen over the past five days. 

You scoff. “He’s not alright. He took a bullet to the shoulder, Hotch–”

“–Instead of you,” he says, and doesn’t back down when your eyes narrow at him. “That’s the issue, isn’t it? That he went in first? That he got hurt, and not you?”

Your breath hitches, and the frown you’ve levelled at him softens ever so slightly. Patient as ever, Hotch watches you, scans your face whilst he waits for your answer. 

It pours out of you in a hapless string of words you’re surprised he can understand. “He shouldn’t have. We should never have split up. I should’ve called for backup–”

Hotch’s voice is soft, but firm. “There was no time for backup. You know that.”

You hate to admit it, but he’s right. It’s been nine days since Reid’s been stuck at home recovering. In those nine days, you’ve visited his apartment with home-cooked meals, watched God knows how many episodes of Doctor Who, and called him every evening you’ve been away on this case. In those nine days, you’ve reconstructed – down to the millisecond – the crack of the gunshot, then Reid’s collapse; the unsub’s, then the warmth of Spencer’s blood staining your hands as you pressed down on his wound.

Hotch is right. There’d been no time to wait for help once the two of you had realised the man you were set to interview was the unsub you’d been searching for, no time when you knew a young girl’s life was at risk. But that knowledge doesn’t make the whole affair sting any less.

“This job is all about calculation,” says Hotch. His eyes trace your face, refusing to let you sink into self-blaming territory. “It’s about decision-making when there’s no time for it. It’s about guessing at the odds and acting on that instinct. Reid knows that better than anyone. That’s why he’s still alive. It’s why you’re here, too, with this team.”

You make no response. Sighing, he takes the newspaper and sets it down between the two of you, then reaches for the pen you left on it. The unfinished puzzle stares at you from the back page. 

Though far from your usual self, you can’t resist teasing him just a little. “Thanks, Master Oogway.”

His returning expression is one reserved for the worst of the police chiefs you encounter as a unit, but you swear you see his shoulders sag as much as his rigid posture allows, and his eyes are soft. 

“You are too concerned with what was and what will be,” he quotes, deadpan. From the moment the words pass his lips, you know he regrets it. Then, raising an eyebrow, he hands you the pen and stares down at the page in your laps. 

Minutes pass without a word spoken by either of you. With a tentative smile threatening to form on your face, you look up at Hotch. “Do you even play chess?”

“Sometimes, with Jack,” he tells you. “Reid wasn’t Gideon’s only student. Someone had to be the guinea pig.”

“Guinea pig?”

Hotch hums. “He got bored, in the end.”

You laugh, and within another half hour, the two of you manage it. It’s far from the five or ten minutes Reid waits before explaining the solution to you, hands flailing as he does, but you’re almost glad for the change. That’s a tradition reserved for the two of you; one on hold, but not finished with. 

Rook to the sixth rank, black’s pawn takes. White’s pawn to b7, checkmate.

It’s really that simple. Embarrassingly so. When you finally figure it out, Hotch drags a hand down his face, huffs out a laugh. Something warm builds in your chest that you decide not to question.

You’re not exactly happy, not without your closest friend next to you and rattling off every aviation statistic he knows. But you are somewhat reassured, and you’ve a completed chess puzzle to take to his apartment and gloat over when you next see him.

There’s movement in the seat next to you, and you have to suppress a frown when Hotch gets up and walks back towards the front of the plane. It’s the most he’s moved in an hour. You see him grab a few files from the briefcase on the couch, and then he’s back in his prior position with a pen in hand and a concentrated frown set in place. 

You aren’t sure how much time passes, but it’s wordless and comfortable, spent on your end with your head resting against the jet’s window.

The periodic scribble of Hotch’s pen eventually pulls you towards sleep. Before you’re all the way there, you register the distant rustle of fabric. When you wake a few hours later, it’s with a jacket tucked around your shoulders, and your head nestled in the crook of your boss’ neck. 

sorry for disappearing for two months! if you sent something to my inbox and I haven't written it, I'm very sorry! It's definitely not a lack of interest on my part, but more time constraints and a limit on how often I end up writing - please feel free to send a request/thoughts my way - even if I can't get around to them, I love reading them :) if you want them written especially soon though, I might not be your best bet!!

[acourtofchaos]

Currently having so many ideas and thanks to them all whirring about in my brain, I can't decide what to actually sit down and write first, so I'm gonna write a little description of each (apologies because I absolutely suck at summaries) and then leave it up to a poll because why not 🤷‍♀️

IDEA #1

Mattheo Riddle x F!Reader / Tom Riddle x F!Reader. Set a little while after the war when the world seems to be returning back to normal. But peace doesn't last and the Riddle brothers have been keeping secrets from you about rumours that are swirling to do with Voldemort's followers not entirely being gone. It all comes to light in the worst possible way when the three of you are attacked and Mattheo sacrifices himself to save you and his brother. As months go by and you remain drowning in your grief whilst Tom grows utterly possessed by grief and revenge, the only solace you find is with each other which eventually leads to something neither of you could have ever expected and complicates everything when your investigations into the rogue ex death eaters lead you to a shocking discovery. Mattheo is still alive.

IDEA #2

Mattheo Riddle x F!Reader. When you are asked by the order to spy on Mattheo and he is told to spy on you by his father, the two of you forced to put aside your hatred for each other in order to fulfill your tasks. But just how close are the two of you willing to get to the other in order to be successful and will the fragile feelings that begin to bloom, despite convincing yourselves its still all fake, be able to survive when the lies you've built them on come to light?

IDEA #3

Theodore Nott x Lestrange!Reader. Rivals since you were kids, you and Theo have never been capable of doing anything except butt heads. But times are changing and the world is growing dark, on the very precipice of a war that neither of you want to be part of but you've been signed up to since you were born. When the pressure to become the perfect soldiers your parents expect you to be will you both break and lose yourselves or will you find salvation and the will to fight back in the very person who had always prayed to see your downfall?

IDEA #4

Lorenzo Berkshire x F!Reader. This one is mainly vibes atm but best friends to lovers with a shit ton of pining, drunken kisses that they insist mean nothing (lies), a first love confession that goes horrifically wrong and some angst and miscommunication before they get the second confession perfectly right.

IDEA #5

Tom Riddle x F!Reader. Smut smut smut. I basically got inspired by the song sucker for pain and imagined a scenario where you and Tom are in a relationship where you deliberately piss each other off and make each other jealous just so the other one will ruin them. Like imagine Tom thinking he has the upper hand in this scenario constantly because if you piss him off he gets to ruin you and if he pisses you off he still gets to ruin you because there's no way you'll be able to ruin him right? You won't be able to make beg. There's no way you won't break first and end up begging him to fuck you because no matter what you do, the man has immaculate restraint and he would never lower himself to begging anyone for anything. Even you.

Oh how wrong he is.

IDEA #6

Mattheo Riddle x F!Reader. Smut smut smut. Despite breaking up, you and Mattheo just can't seem to stay away from each other.

Inspired by maroon 5's animals

IDEA #7

Mattheo Riddle x F!Reader. Smut smut smut. Best friend Mattheo being jealous as fuck of the guys you keep wasting your time with and being determined to prove to you that he knows you better and could treat you way better than any of them ever could.

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 3

Episode 19: Balloons of Doom

~The Man Cave~

The Man Cave team were blissfully unaware of everything that was happening outside the four walls of their secret-base sanctuary. Unless they watched the news or got a call, they didn't hear about things until they inevitably got dragged into it, meaning that if Doctor Minyak and his assistant, Nurse Cohort wanted to invade a Man Fan meeting and hold Piper hostage so that she could be used as bargaining material with Captain Man, then it would take a while to reach them. 

The girl was terrified, she'd been threatened with the possibility of flying off into the upper atmosphere by some of the Doctor's deadliest, super-helium balloons and was praying that Swellview's best crime fighters would come to help her, Jasper, plus two other innocent kids before it was too late. However, Ray was preoccupied, having been asked to submit a Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger photo for the new Swellview annual calendar, the first that his girl would feature in and he wanted it to be perfect. So, he had dragged his friends into it, meaning now, Charlotte was wearing a swimsuit, he, Henry and (y/n) were in their super suits and they were all posing in front of a Hawaiian background so Schwoz could snap some photos.

"Okay, a few more..." Schwoz mumbled as his camera flashed and Ray and Henry flexed their muscles. They were loving their time in front of the camera; they had a beach ball, a towel, the kid and (y/n) had flowers tucked behind their ears and even Charlotte got to hold a surfboard and pretend she was loving the sandy beach and lapping waves. The truth though, she wasn't and neither was (y/n). It was a bit weird to just do a photoshoot in the middle of the afternoon and the idea of being a pinup was a bit disconcerting, but if it made Ray happy then, why not?

"Hey, Henry, look! There's some hot, teenage girls on the beach. Wave at them!" The young woman teased, thinking that she might as well have fun whilst doing this and seeing the boy get flustered was all too funny. It had been way too long since Henry last had a girlfriend, in fact, she could swear that he hadn't seen anyone since she and Ray had started dating and that was like, what? Nine months ago?

"Hey, girls!" Ray waved at the imaginary girls, pretending that he was helping his sidekick appear cool since he was Captain Man, not to mention all the experience he had with the opposite sex. Even though he was seriously trying to put his flirting-with-anything-that-had-a-pulse days behind him, he could still help his very single sidekick find a date.

"Hey, girls." Henry smiled at the wall, not being nearly as enthusiastic as Ray because the notion of flirting with thin air made him feel stupid. With his track record, even imaginary girls wouldn't be interested, would leave him for a dumb TV show or would be a criminal in disguise. 

"Come on, ladies like it when boys show interest." (y/n) chuckled, loving how an embarrassed flush was rising from his high collar and rapidly closing in on his cheeks. She was a girl, in a relationship, so surely, she could give him advice too and not just in a fake scenario. Anything she told him would be much better in practice than whatever Ray told him to do.

"Hey, girls!!!" Ray squawked, purposefully acting stupid since it made his sweet girl laugh when he posed with the towel draped over his shoulder and a frisbee held high in his hand. Yeah, that's definitely how he seduced her, smiling and waving like an idiot (to be fair, his goofy personality was one of the disarming factors of her descent into a total, unapologetic love for him).

"Okay, you're both embarrassing me in front of the girls that don't exist." Henry snapped, feeling like he was on vacation with his demented parents or something. Not the cool, 'let you stay up past your bedtime' parents, no, the embarrassing, 'let's all wear matching sweaters and take a group photo' parents. Why couldn't they stay cool? Why did they have to relish his embarrassment so much?

"Girls like guys who act like idiots. I mean, it worked on me." (y/n) grinned, gesturing to Ray, who looked proud for a second before his brain clocked onto the hidden meaning behind her words.

"Hey!" He grumbled, giving her a pouty lip and big, sad eyes like he'd taken a hit to the heart. He knew she wasn't serious though and loved being her idiot, her anything was an honour, to be honest, an honour that he was striving to uphold and preserve for the rest of his life.

"I love you, though." She smiled and he gently tucked the pink hibiscus flower behind her ear again before it could fall out. Schwoz saw a perfect photo opportunity and took it, snapping the moment when they were gazing up at each other with lovestruck gazes and bright smiles. He'd be printing that one out later, maybe to tease them about how everyone else disappeared when they looked into each other's eyes, but for now, he needed more superhero action.

"Come on, Henry, give me more emotion, like these two. Uh, gives me some feels, baby." Schwoz smirked, rolling his hips in a way that made the boy and couple uncomfortable for a second before Ray decided that they needed more headshots. He could admire his sweet girl later.

"Yeah, come on, Henry, we're on a beach in Hawaii." The superhero tried to inspire some enthusiasm into him, waving his hands like they were the sea, but Henry had had enough. He wasn't on vacation, he was at work, wearing his super suit and holding a beach ball. Not very fun.

"No, we're not. I—I feel dumb." He confessed, making (y/n) put her hands on her hips and nod ever so slightly. She could understand that feeling, but in ten years, she'd learnt that it was normally best to indulge Ray and whatever antics he got up to, within reason, of course.

"Hey, do you have any idea how many people wish that they were gonna be featured in the new Swellview calendar?" He asked the kid, trying to convey that this was a privilege, something to be proud of, something that they could look forward to seeing all over town when it went on sale.

"So, go find them. I don't wanna do this." Charlotte jumped in, having got bored of holding the surfboard over her shoulder and walking on the spot. The pink lei around her neck was starting to tickle and she was sure that (y/n)'s was too, making her wonder why she'd agreed to do this in the first place. Sure, her face wouldn't be visible on the calendar but deep down, she'd always know the embarrassing truth.

"Hey, look, everybody. Charlotte's complaining, that's fresh." Ray rolled his eyes, making Henry and Schwoz laugh as (y/n) looked at him furiously. Oh, how she wished he could hold his tongue for once.

"Don't be mean!" She snapped, pointing a finger under his nose and giving him a stern glare that told she wasn't happy. If Charlotte didn't want to do it, the standing around, freezing in a two-piece swimsuit then she shouldn't have to, but just as he went to say something back, the supercomputer began to beep.

"Hey, hotline call," Henry announced, glancing over at the monitor and seeing that this wasn't just a general problem, the hotline meant that someone could be in serious trouble.

"Yeah. Schwoz, Charlotte, get over there so you won't be seen." Ray instructed them, not wanting a repeat of past episodes where one of his employees got spotted working for him. What a mess that was. They discarded their props, chucking them to the floor since there was no time to put them away properly, Ray even going as far as to throw his towel over Charlotte's head as she walked over to the right of the computer. It was safe near the sprocket, the only place where the monitor couldn't see them.

"This is Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger—" Ray started but quickly tapped (y/n)'s and Henry's arms when he noticed that they still had the hibiscuses tucked behind their ears. The kid could get rid of his own, but Ray couldn't help but pluck the flower from his girl's hair himself, making sure to run his gloved fingertips over the curve of her ear since he knew it sent a shiver down her spine and a blush to her cheeks.

"Uh, w-what's your emergency?" (y/n) stuttered, wanting to wipe that stupid smirk off her boyfriend's face when she saw him hide it under his serious, superhero expression. She'd get him back, she'd pick a good moment when he least expected it and then she'd leave him a babbling mess, but all thoughts of revenge were pushed to the back of her mind when all the monitors flickered to Doctor Minyak's evil sneer. 

"Actually, it's your emergency." He retorted, a smug note present in his voice as he revealed himself to the heroes. This was his time to tell them about his dastardly plan and how there was nothing poor little Captain Man could do about it.

"Minyak!" Ray spat, his harsh, growling tone making (y/n)'s tummy flutter as she remembered how underneath her loveable, squishy boyfriend, laid the raw, brute strength and ferocity of a powerful man who could snap the criminal in two like he was a twig. And boy, Ray wanted to, he hated scum like Minyak and was secretly partial to how his girlfriend loved Captain Man nearly as much as she loved Ray Manchester. If only he could get his hands on that twerp.

"Doctor Minyak!" The villain growled, hating how no one ever used his full title. Without it, he didn't seem as sinister or menacing, more like an idiot.

"You're no doctor, you're just evil!" The superhero argued but the smart-ass criminal found a loophole in his words, causing a smirk to spread across his features.

"Those two things aren't mutually exclusive, you know?" He retorted, using words that were a bit beyond Ray's understanding. Why couldn't he use smaller ones? The big ones just made him sound like a stuck-up prick.

"What does that mean?" He frowned, looking to (y/n) for help since she was a lot smarter than him. And prettier and funnier and nicer and kinder and you get the idea.

"That a person can be a doctor and evil at the same time. Also means he's a massive dickhead that nobody likes" (y/n) explained, ensuring to raise her voice for the last bit, although her voice wobbled when Henry grabbed her arm and Ray's sleeve so that they could bob down and huddle together to talk.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Ray asked the boy as they crouched below the camera and spoke in hushed voices. He was just about to give Minyak the third degree when the kid pulled him down and he couldn't think about what was so important.

"I think Doctor Minyak is at my house," Henry whispered, making the adults' faces turn serious. Come to think of it, the background did look familiar and if anyone knew the Hart's house then it was gonna be Henry, which begged the question, what in the name of God was Minyak doing there?

"Okay. Is your mom or dad home?" Ray asked, making (y/n)'s breath hitch. She knew that he'd given her his word that he'd change, but just the mention of the beautiful Mrs Hart sent her skin crawling and her mind wandering. What if he'd changed his mind and decided that the one-girl life wasn't for him?

"No, why?" Henry replied, also feeling slightly apprehensive as to his boss's answer. It could go either way and was completely in his hands, would he do the right thing or lose the one good thing he had?

"Just, y'know, making sure they're safe. It's kinda my job, kid." He grinned, making his sidekicks visibly deflate with relief. Ray wasn't as stupid as he looked and knew that his words carried meaning; he'd vowed to keep her safe and happy and if he had to let go of the guy he used to be to keep her then he would, without hesitation.

"Hey now, where did you go?" Minyak questioned as he tried to look closer into his camera like if he got any closer it would make them appear. The superheroes couldn't hide forever, so they sprung back up with glares on their faces.

"All right, Minyak, where are you?" Ray asked, beating back the grin that tried to wiggle its way onto his face when he felt (y/n) gently slip her hand into his, squeezing it briefly as if to tell him thank you, thank you for saying the right thing, thank you for choosing me.

"Who? Me? I just happen to be at the house of the president of your Man Fans." The villain snarled and dragged Piper into the shot, his arm wrapped tightly around her neck, which sent Henry into a furious, big-brother, protector mode. The sight of the fear in his little sister's eyes made him angry, rageful and Henry swore that if Minyak harmed one single hair on Piper's head, then he would kill him.

"Pi--" The boy tried to say but (y/n) couldn't let him reveal how he cared for the little girl, not even if she was feeling her protective, motherly, sisterly, whatever stupid instincts screaming at her to throttle that bastard for threatening a child. No one could show how much this was infuriating them, carving out their hearts and replacing them with hate, it would just complicate things - they needed clear heads to save her and complete anonymity to keep their identities secret.

"Wait, what was that? What did he say?" Minayk demanded to know, not missing how Kid Danger had tried to say something but Miss Danger stopped him. It sounded like the girl's name, but he couldn't be sure and he sure as hell wasn't letting it go.

"Uh, I think he was gonna say pi---" Ray and Henry elongated the sound, thinking of something unrelated to Piper but also slightly believable. 

"--Napples! He said pineapples!" (y/n) exclaimed, giving Henry a wide-eyed stare that made him laugh nervously and agree. He'd have to just roll with it.

"That's it! Kids today, they love pineapples!"

"I love pineapples! Pineapples, pinecones..." 

"And the number pi! Three point one four one five nine two six five three five eight nine, etcetera. I mean, I love pi, pi's great, it's so good for circles and physics. It's Greek, y'know, good, old pi..." The three kept ranting and raving, hoping that they'd say so much nonsense that the doctor would be too confused to remember Henry's mistake and amazingly, it worked.

"Okay, be cool, be cool." (y/n) nudged them both in the ribs, making them shut up about all the variations of "pi" before they seemed stupid in front of the bad guy. They had reputations to uphold and they weren't going to let them go for someone like Minyak.

"Okay, Minyak..." Henry started, refocusing his glare on the doctor as he remembered how he had his sister as a hostage. Piper was a brat and she'd been wickedly cruel to him over the years, but underneath all that, she was still his baby sister and he'd die before he let anything happen to her.

"Hmmm?..." The man smirked cunningly, knowing that he was toying with the superheroes and pushing all of their buttons. To him, Piper was just the President of the Man Fans, nothing more, but he knew that she was still an innocent civilian, the perfect bait for these suckers.

"We know exactly where you are." (y/n) growled, folding her arms and scrunching her nose up at the sight of the heinous man. She wasn't a fan of any villain, not when she and her boyfriend were superheroes, but the child-nappers, they really got under her skin.

"So, you just wait right there like a little a good, little jerk! And we'll be there in a few minutes with our fists." Ray told Minyak, raising his clenched hands to show how he was going to pulverise his face when they got to Henry's house.

"Six fists," Henry noted, raising his own hands and promoting (y/n) to do the same. It felt a little weird to flex her fighting capabilities to the doctor, who wasn't interested or intimidated. He was just amused to see them so sure of themselves.

"Yeah. It's gonna be a real...fistival." Oh, dear god. Poor Ray, he was trying so hard to sound witty and tough, but the line didn't sound as good out loud as it did in his head. Even (y/n) could understand Minyak's confusion and just wanted to hang up on this loser so they could go kick some evil doctor butt. "A what?"

"What did you say?" She asked him quietly, briefly glancing away from the screen to look at him and how his face still held the same confidence. She could never, she'd have faltered and backtracked her words as soon as Minyak questioned them, so she had to hand it to him - he was dealing with it a lot better than she ever could.

"I said fistival. You know, like a festival but with fists?" Ray explained his portmanteau, which was clever in some ways, but dumb in others. He wasn't the new Shakespeare, but in his own way, he was certainly adorable, well, at least to (y/n) he was.

"Oh, god, that's so stupid," Minyak stated, making the young woman feel incredibly protective over her boyfriend. Yeah, he was goofy, but she didn't take kindly to asshole criminals making fun of him.

"Hey, I'm the only one who gets to call him stupid! Okay? You're just a weirdo doctor." (y/n) put one hand on Ray's chest, glowering at Minyak like he'd kicked a puppy or spat on an old person. Captain Man was the last person who needed protecting, but she'd always believed that just because he was indestructible on the outside, it didn't mean that Ray Manchester didn't need protecting on the inside. He was just as human as everyone else and sometimes, he needed someone in his corner too.

"Hey, you know what you should've said?" Henry turned to Ray, smiling as he thought of something equally clever and silly. 

"No," Ray answered, still reeling from how his sweet, perfect girl jumped to his defence despite being capable of sticking up for himself. It was the moment where he realised that she felt similar things for him that he felt for her; she didn't want him upset, she didn't want to see him hurt, even if she could never beat someone to a pulp in the same way he could. She wanted to shield him from the worst things in life, like a home sheltering him from the harsh world outside - his home.

"You should've said, I hope you're thirsty...'cause, we're bringing some punch!" Henry trusted his fist upwards, thinking he sounded so cool. They could do the fight-related puns all day, but they'd never find something to impress Minayk, he was just too void of humour.

"Ah, yes, punch. That's very clever." The doctor said in a dry tone, which made it hard to know whether he was impressed or not. Still, his praise made Henry smirk and Ray roll his eyes, whilst (y/n) glanced at Charlotte and Schwoz to share a look of boredom. They'd been leaning over a cabinet and listening in to the entire conversation, feeling pretty tired with how nothing had been done so far. Couldn't they just go kick Minayk's head in?

"So bored..." Charlotte mumbled. She didn't what was worse, the photoshoot or the waiting around. 

"Maybe we should leave," Schwoz suggested, thinking of all the things they could be doing instead; eating ice cream, playing video games, inventing weapons of mass destruction. So many entertaining things that would be useful and so much better than listening to this drivel.

"Nah, they're gonna need us eventually." The teen replied, fully aware of how the superheroes always relied on her and Schwoz to save the day, not just at that moment. Yeah, (y/n) was pretty good at keeping herself out of trouble, but when Henry and Ray dragged her into their problems and got her stuck too, then it left them to do all the hard work. It was what they were paid to do.

"Just, come on, let's go attack Minyak," Ray said, tapping his girl on the arm so they could walk off and go get him and Cohort, who was staying rather quiet and sneaky. 

"Yeah, sure. I can't wait to kick his ass." The young woman shrugged, allowing her boyfriend to guide her away from the computer with his hand in the small of her back, but the evil doctor wasn't going to let them leave. It was all a part of his ingenious, devilish plan to screw Captain Man and Co, once and for all.

"NOOO! If you three super-zeros don't stay right where you are, this kid flies." Minyak bellowed and turned the camera to face Piper, who was strapped into a table chair with balloons tied to each leg. It was some sick, twisted, Up-inspired shit, one of Minyak's finest plans, sending Henry into a rage-filled haze again.

"Help! He's got a Hebrew-meter!" Piper cried, making everyone perk up with worry. Schwoz and Charlotte weren't bored now and (y/n) made sure to put a hand on Henry's wrist to both comfort him and keep him calm.  She knew it was hard to see someone you love in danger, but revealing who he was wouldn't help anything. A few threats were fine though, Minyak deserved those.

"Heliometer!" The man in question snapped as he corrected Piper on how she made his weapon seem so ridiculous. 

"Wait, wait, wait, what do you mean the kid flies?" Ray asked, also trying to keep Henry's cool, but he had to admit, even he was a tad worried. Would he be able to live with himself if something happened to Piper when he could've saved her?

"Yeah, what do you mean flies?" Henry added, his voice having an undeniable waver to it as his heart thumped in his chest. He didn't take Minyak for a guy who took kids on nice, scenic flights, it could only mean he had something evil up his sleeve.

"You see, if I use this to blast the helium in those balloons, it will geometrically increase their heliocity and then, your president will fly straight up, through the ceiling and she won't stop until she hits the moon!" The supervillain laughed at the fear on Piper's face, loving how he was hitting Captain Man where it hurt. His fan club, therefore his ego, and a child, therefore his kind heart; a win-win situation. 

"The moon?!" The girl exclaimed, feeling a chill of terror creep up her spine. She wouldn't make it that far, she'd pass out from hypoxia on the edge of the atmosphere, dying as the temperature became fatal. 

"All right, you sick bastard..." (y/n) growled, lunging forward like she was going to claw at the screen, only to be held back by Ray clutching her arm. They had to keep their heads, even if it was hard, they'd figure out a solution.

"Now you listen to me, Doctor Minyak. If you hurt that girl, you're dead meat." Henry growled, showing his protective, big-brother side so much that his boss had to nudge his stomach subtly to tell him to reign it in. He was being too obvious. "I mean, I don't know that girl personally, I just care so much because it's my job to care about people like that girl in that chair, who I do not know."

"No, you listen. For the next three hours, my minions will be travelling all over Swellview, robbing, stealing, burgling, all the evil errands. And the three of you will do nothing to stop me because I'm watching you, Kid Danger, Captain Man and Miss Danger. And if you leave my view, the girl flies!" Minyak told them, causing Ray and Henry to clench their teeth. They had to agree to his demands, for now anyway, it was too big of a risk moving and possibly getting Piper hurt.

"Fine! We'll just call the cops." (y/n) retorted, making the boys nod victoriously. If Captain Man used his influence, then the Swellview police would get their asses into gear and do some actual work for once. He was terrifying when angered.

"If you call the police, the girl flies!" Minyak snarled, not letting Miss Danger be so smart. He still remembered how she had fooled him the last time they met, how she had been so alluring and seducing that he'd been tricked into failure. Well, not this time. 

"Shit, I thought that was gonna work." The woman muttered, turning around and gently bumping her forehead into Ray's chest. She was frustrated with herself for thinking that something so simple would work, but. her dumb brain wasn't coming up with any other ideas.

"It's okay, sweet girl." He muttered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head before she spun back around to glare at Minyak, who had connected his go-pro, PearPhone thing to the TV so we now, he could watch the superheroes' every twitch. 

"You'll never get away with this, Minyak," Ray growled as something flickered past the camera, something in the background. It was Jasper, who had taken the rescue into his own hands, Mission Impossible-style. He'd swiped a vase from the accent table, carpet, ducked and rolled behind the couch and counters and was now sneaking towards Nurse Cohort with the hopes that he could subdue her and get the crossbow laser she was holding. 

"You literally always lose." He could hear Henry say from the TV, but he had to focus. He was Captain Man's employee, for god's sake, he could do this. The curly-haired boy snuck around the couch and past the front door, keeping his eyes on both Cohort and the two innocent Man Fans who sat under her watchful gaze. Just a little more, he crept forward a little more, standing adjacent to the fireplace and lifted the vase in his hands, ready to crack it down on her skull, but...

"You're one of the worst villains ever and a horrible person. There, I said it." Minyak's argument with the superheroes continued, just as Jasper brought down the object and Nurse Cohort turned around, and so did the doctor himself, and the kids, and Piper, everyone, in fact. The moment he decided to strike was ill-judged or perhaps he was just unlucky because holding a heavy vase in his hands looked highly suspicious.                                                                                           

"Um...is this yours?" He asked, switching from James Bond to Mr Bean in three seconds as he realised that he should leave the espionage and crimefighting to the experts. 

"No." Nurse Cohort deadpanned, knowing that she'd caught the boy in the act of trying to deck her. She wouldn't waste a laser on him though, she'd much prefer to show the superheroes her blaster skills, well, Miss Danger anyway. That lucky bitch got to have Captain Man all to herself, the man that she had sworn to hate but found herself fancying anyway. 

"'Kay." Jasper nodded meekly and put the vase on the mantelpiece of the fire before he got himself into any more trouble. He sat down on the couch as per Minayk's gesturing and slumped into the cushion's as he sulked. 

He would've been a good hero. 

~Fifteen minutes later~

Standing for so long in heeled boots, not doing anything but listening to Minyak ranting to his minions about robbing an Inside Out Burger was not (y/n)'s idea of fun. She, her boyfriend and Henry had been standing at the computer for way too long and were all beginning to get antsy. With Minyak's attention being so focused on them, it was impossible to do anything, but luckily for them, two sneaky helpers had chosen their moment to strike.

Charlotte and Schwoz crept out from their hiding spot next to the computer and shuffled along under the control panel so they could talk to Ray, Henry and (y/n) without diverting their eyes and causing suspicion. 

"Guys! Guys! Psst!" Charlotte whispered, trying to get their attention, but they couldn't glance down properly without looking like they were doing something. Schwoz being Schwoz, definitely couldn't see how they were trying to look down without moving their heads and decided that blowing raspberries and covering them with slobber was the best way to go about it.

"Geez!" Charlotte exclaimed quietly, wiping a blob of spit from under her eye with her finger. Honestly, she wanted to get their attention and stay clean, what a moron.

"Gross," Henry mumbled, resisting the urge to go and scrub his face with soap and hot water. If he had to take a faceful of spit, then he would do it, just for Piper.

"You got spit all over my face, you dick." (y/n) muttered too, briefly screwing her eyes shut before remembering that Minyak could hang up at any moment. 

"Just, listen. Schwoz and I think we know a way you can go stop Doctor Minyak." Charlotte told them, a curious wonder lighting up in her eyes as she thought about the sneaky plan she and the genius had concocted. 

"We can't go anywhere." Ray hissed, speaking through his teeth since he didn't want his enemy to see him speaking to someone who wasn't Henry or his sweet girl. 

"We have to stay here." Henry agreed, keeping as still as possible so he could protect his sister. He was still interested in the plan though, anything to get out of the Man Cave and stop Minyak.

"No, Doctor Minyak just has to think you're here," Charlotte smirked, confusing the heck out of the three. What was she on about?

"How can we--" (y/n) frowned, but was quickly shushed when they heard something happening on the monitor and Charlotte and Schwoz decided that their brief moment was up. 

"Shhh. Just wait there." Schwoz 

"We'll be back. The girl whispered, crawling back to their hiding place before the doctor could see that the superheroes weren't alone. She didn't want Minyak seeing her or Schwoz and knowing their identities, or carrying out his threat and harming Piper.

"Wait, what?" Henry stuttered, wanting to know what the plan was before they hid again. They couldn't just tease them with an idea like that and then snatch it away before they knew what was going.

"Kid, look like you're not saying anything--" (y/n) tried to get him to shut up because Henry was getting a little too animated for someone who wasn't supposed to say or do anything. 

"Just tell us the plan--" Henry hissed at them, but he ripped his focus back to the monitor when he noticed that Minyak's angry eyes and furrowed eyebrows were staring into the camera, studying their every move. 

"What are you three talking about?" He hissed, making the three gulp, smile and return an innocent look at what he was insinuating. Ray wrapped an arm around (y/n)'s shoulders and pulled her to his chest, where she smiled sweetly and pretended like all she was doing was enjoying a moment with her doofus.

"Uhhh..."

"Uhhh..."

"Just...

"Just...cheeses," Henry answered after a lot of thinking. It was another lie, born in a moment of panic, but he'd said now and they'd have to work with it if they wanted to keep fooling this dick.

"Cheeses that we enjoy." Ray nodded, pressing himself closer to his girl until they were practically joined at the hip, the contact grounding them both enough to think of some examples.

"Yeah, I'm into cheddar." The boy shrugged, glancing at the couple and internally gagging at how adorably gross they were. It was cute and what he'd wished for when they were still pining for each other, but god, it was sappy. Maybe he just needed a girlfriend and then he'd get it.

"I like Manchego. A hard, Spanish cheese." Ray replied, thinking of the first thing that came to his mind, probably because it was a bit like his surname. That and he liked it. 

"And me, well, I like...Red Leicester, a good, old-fashioned, English classic. It's so...orange and I like orange things so---" (y/n) ranted randomly, running her mouth in a panic as she saw Nurse Cohort circle the children on the couch, her crossbow laser pointed at their heads. What an evil bitch, she wouldn't hurt kids, would she?

"Well, I hate cheese. Especially the Spanish ones that are hard and the English ones that are orange! And I hate you!" Minyak snarled, his face peering deeper into the lense so closely that they could see that his fury was making the veins on his forehead pop out.

"Ah, fair enough." Henry nodded. Minyak couldn't scare him, not when he was burning with rage on the inside from how Piper was still being held captive. 

"We appreciate the feedback." Ray smiled, his grin growing when he saw how his sarcasm made his girlfriend chuckle. There was that sight and sound he loved to see and hear, her happiness was his and allowed him to wash away any fear he had for what was happening. He could stop Minyak when he had her in his corner.

~Half an hour later~

So, the plan was simple yet complexly weird, something only Schwoz and Charlotte could have come up with. Her brilliance blended with his eccentricity into something that sounded like it would work, but would require Charlotte dressing up in a weird disguise and Schwoz using one of his more uncomplicated inventions to sneak the heroes out.

So, here she was; Charlotte crept up onto Henry's porch, glasses and a blonde wig pinned to her scalp so she could distract Minyak long enough to draw his focus away from the screen and onto the crap she was selling.

"Okay, Schwoz. I'm at Henry's house. Ready?" She whispered as she crouched on the porch and held her phone to her ear. She wasn't sure what she was going to say to the supervillain, but it had to be good, and long enough to give her friends a chance.

"Yes. Go ahead and distract Minyak." He instructed her, bracing himself to shove his invention into action the moment the man wasn't looking at the TV.

"Got it. Bye." She whispered and picked up her box of batteries so she could ring the doorbell and pose as a door-to-door salesperson. Cookies or insurance would have been more convincing but this was the only thing she could find quickly and collect enough of to show the doctor. 

The superheroes watched as Minyak heard the doorbell and went to open the door. It was difficult to see the interaction as they were too far to the right to get in shot, but they could still hear Charlotte greet him warmly and flog her double-a batteries with all her heart. 

"Okay, now! He's not looking, quick! Hurry!" Schwoz exclaimed, prompting Ray, Henry and (y/n) to unfreeze and move off to the right, where Schwoz had one of the weirdest contraptions they'd ever seen. It was technologically brilliant or complex, just a large photo of the Man Cave printed onto a board, three harnesses bolted to it and a selfie stick stuck in the middle. The idea was that no matter how much the superheroes moved, it would always look like they were still in their hideout, simple.

"How does this work?" Ray asked, wondering how the hell they were meant to sneak out with that thing strapped to their backs. It looked cumbersome and tricky to navigate, especially since they'd all have to step in time to avoid tripping up and spoiling the disguise.

"What does it do?" Henry questioned too, not taking a moment to look at it like (y/n) did. It seemed easy to her, not the best strategy, but better than nothing.

"It will make Minyak think that you're still in the Man Cave. Now, stand side by side, (y/n) in the middle, and turn around. Hurry!" He ordered them impatiently, the knowledge that Minyak wouldn't be fooled forever still in the back of his mind.

"All right, all right. Geez, you don't have to be so crabby." (y/n) rolled her eyes, but did as he said, positioning herself in the middle harness so it would look like they hadn't switched places from how they were at the computer. 

"That goes through there," Schwoz told Henry, who was struggling with the belt that would attach him to the board. It was tricky for Ray too, who admittedly, was all fingers and thumbs when it came to tasks of precision, and the gloves made it worse.

"Does that go across the whole way?" The superhero asked, wondering if the strap on his belt stretched from his side, over his girl's tummy and over to Henry, but no. It was meant to just feed through the leather loop on his harness and tighten the material across his waist.

"No, no, no, let me do it." (y/n) batted his clumsy fingers away and helped him fix it properly. Her fingers didn't shake or falter, not even when she heard Minyak and Charlotte's arguing over the batteries get louder and louder. Ray swallowed when he felt her touch drift lower completely unintentionally, she was just trying to help but he couldn't help but let his mind stray to other times when her wandering fingers weren't so innocent.

"Is this the best you can do, Schwoz? A poster and some belts?" He asked harshly, trying to swat away his dirty thoughts by letting them out as mild anger, which made Schwoz step back with offence written all over his face. They heard Minyak scream something about not wanting any more batteries and by the sound of the door slamming roughly, it looked like their time was up. The doctor was on the warpath and it was time to see if Schwoz's stupid plan would work.

"And now!" Schwoz said, pressing a button that switched the computer camera off and channelled the feed into the small, Pearphone-like device that was wobbling in front of them. The image on the TV flickered momentarily before showing the smiling superheroes on the screen once more and it was surprisingly convincing. 

"Yes, my three friends being good little boys and girl." Minyak didn't even bat an eyelash, he was just looking at three losers caught in his web. Oh, how wrong he was.

"It's working! Go rescue Piper and Jasper!" Schwoz hissed, shooing the three away so they could get started on the whole rescuing thing. 

"Right. Let's go." Ray whispered and they started to step to the side in synch, looking like crabs as they tried to move at a reasonable pace and keep the camera still. Too much shaking and Minyak would smell a rat, leaving them back at square one. 

"Watch for the trolley!---Never mind." (y/n)'s mumbled warning came a bit too late as Ray ran straight into the tool trolley that had been left in the middle of the room. With the man on the right, it was his job to steer, navigate and look where they were going, all without turning his head or looking suspicious, so when his leg caught the metal and made a rackety, clattering, it made them all cringe.

"Nurse Cohort, quick! Look at this!" Minyak exclaimed as he swore he heard or saw something peculiar. His eyes must've been lying to him because he was sure that he saw the Man Cave judder or the superheroes move.

"Look at what?" The hot assistant asked, dashing over to his side so she could look at the screen. She wasn't complaining, she could look at Captain Man's face all day and not get bored, she just needed to flick that stupid Miss Danger away and then he would be all hers.

"The quality of the picture on this television. Isn't it fabulous?" Minyak smiled as he took in the expensive TV's qualities. Its magnificence took his mind off the peculiarity he saw moments before, something he wrote off as just a trick of the light or something. He much preferred to focus on the perfect, crystalline motions of the "scared" boys and girl before him.

"I guess." Nurse Cohort replied in a confused voice, not sure as to why he called her over for the minor thing. Yeah, it meant that she could look at Captain Man like he was actually in the room, but it wasn't something to get so excited over - it was merely a TV screen.

"No, I bet it's one of those fork TVs." He proposed, not realising that he was making himself sound stupid by mispronouncing the proper term.

"Fork?" Nurse Cohort frowned, wondering what the hell he was on about and why she had chosen to work for such a moron. 

"Yes, very high resolution. Fork..." Minyak repeated dreamily, making it click in (y/n)'s head.

"Uh--U-Um, Minyak? Yeah, hi. I think you mean four-k." She butted in, making the doctor scoff at how she thought herself to be above him in terms of intelligence. She was just a lowly, superhero's sidekick and not even the first one; she was probably just some sad, lowly waif taken in by Captain Man for when he and Kid Danger were busy. 

"Four-k? It's not French!" He replied arrogantly, not realising that he was being the moron and making everyone in the house giggle at how thick he was. Even Nurse Cohort couldn't resist a snigger, despite her hate for the woman and how perfect and prissy she appeared as Captain Man's stupid, stupid, stupid girlfriend.

"No, as in a horizontal display resolution of approximately four-thousand pixels--and he's gone." She tried to explain, unable to help the little nerd engineer inside her streaming to spill the facts, but Minyak just walked off with his headphones on. At least they could keep shuffling now. 

Ray carefully took a step to the side, Henry and (y/n) copying his caution as Schwoz used his controller to open the elevator door for them so they would have to stretch. They had no idea how they were gonna sneak out of Junk-N-Stuff or successfully get to Henry's house, but right now, they were focused on getting upstairs first, which was easier said than done.

The three tried to waddle into the elevator, being mindful not to bask the poster or themselves, but they ran into a rather big problem. The stupid selfie stick was too long to fit through the door, leaving them stuck.

"Pivot! Pivot! Pivot! Pivot! PIVOT!"  Ray hissed under his breath, trying to get them to angle their bodies so they could get one corner in, swerve the board around ninety degrees and then shamble in and his incessant orders weren't tiring at all.

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" Henry snapped, feeling like they were getting nowhere. Thank god Minyak was off doing the evil doctor dance or whatever, 'cause they were being way too obvious.

"Both of you, zip it before he hears you!" (y/n) whacked them both as subtly as she could, making them both stand still. All they needed was sensible, rational thought. " Okay, shuffle, round the corner, shuffle and we're in." 

She made it look so simple.

~Henry's house~

Charlotte was beside herself. It had been an hour since her confrontation with Minyak had ended and she was terrified that Ray, Henry and (y/n) had gotten into trouble on the way over to the kid's house. But, in reality, they hadn't been accosted, attacked or kidnapped, they had just been slow and very, very cautious, taking the safest routes that Captain Man knew would mean no trouble and no sightings. 

"There you guys are! Come on! Hurry! Hurry up! Where have you guys been?" She asked hurriedly as the heroes finally made it onto Henry's porch, tired and achy from how they'd been walking funnily for one mile from Junk-N-Stuff.

"Shhhh!" Henry shushed her when his friend got a little bit too loud. They immediately froze, settling the background in time for Doctor Minyak storming over as he heard the commotion.

"What was that?" He interrogated, studying their faces for any signs of movement or deceit. He wouldn't get any clues, not if they could help it, their faces were stony, emotionless, refusing to show that they had moved across town and were only a few metres away from the man himself.

"What?" Henry played dumb, acting like nothing had happened as Charlotte buttoned her lip, barely daring to move, let alone speak.

"I thought I heard a little girl." Minyak frowned, making them all scramble for a lie to cover up Charlotte's noise.

"Uh, no, no, that's just a game we all play. Like, um...here in the Man Cave." (y/n) lied, carefully waving her hand behind her as if her home was still there. She couldn't let her knuckles brush against the cardboard, otherwise, he would see that it was just a 2-D fake.

"Uh, yeah, it's called, uh...Little girl shush." Ray lied, going with what his girl had said by spouting a load of crap that prompted Henry to get creative.

"Oh, hey, Captain Man..." He said in a ridiculously high-pitched voice that sounded so funny, he and (y/n) struggled to keep their smiles down at how silly he was being. 

"Oh, hush, little girl." He quietened his sidekick, pretending as though it was some fun, inside-joke game that they always played, even though their hearts were pounding as they prayed he would buy it.

"See? It's fun, loads of fun, we do it all the time?" (y/n) chuckled nervously, feeling Ray grasp her hand gently and lace their fingers together. She didn't sound very confident, but with him by her side, she didn't feel scared.

"No more games!" Minyak ordered, having had enough of all the larking about and smiling. He was a villain, he didn't do smiles unless it was an evil smirk and his mean tone made them all shake their heads as if they were gonna do as they were told. 

"Sorry. So, what are you gonna do now? Just gonna go in there and get him?" Charlotte asked quietly, aware of how sensitive the microphone was on Schwoz's mini-camera. She wasn't going to go blabbing again, not when they were so close to victory.

"No, that would be stupid," Ray replied, knowing that just marching in with the stupid board on their backs would cause a total disaster. Minyak would laugh, defeat them and then send Piper on an all-expenses-paid vacation to the moon.

"We would never fit through the front door," Henry added, trying to keep his lip movements to a minimum as he didn't want another Minyak meltdown on his hands.

"We'll have to go in the back way." (y/n) told the boys, expecting Ray to understand what she was saying and then shuffle off, but he did nothing. He stayed perfectly still as if he was waiting for something else.

"...All right, go!" Charlotte urged him, setting the man off awkwardly as he resumed his crab-like march. They waddled through the garden, making sure to avoid any glances or glares from Henry's neighbours and snuck through the yard until they reached the back door. Minyak was too distracted on the phone, blinded by the delight of his minion stealing the wheelchairs from a retirement home. What an asshole.

Piper was still struggling in her chair, trying to get the ropes around her to loosen, but to her dismay, they were surprisingly strong. It didn't matter, in her effort to free herself, she looked up and gasped softly when she saw Captain Man, Miss Danger and Kid Danger shuffling past her kitchen window. 

"Piper is looking at us." (y/n) mumbled under her breath, making the boys peer through the glass to see that she was right - the girl had noticed them. They also saw that Minyak nor Nurse Cohort was watching the TV, so they quickly gestured to convey to her that could really use a distraction to make sure he didn't see them opening the door and whatnot. Piper understood her task and darted her determined gaze towards her captor.

"Hey! Doctor Minyak! Doctor Minyak! Yo, over here! Look at me!" She shouted, trying to get the guy to focus on her and not what was happening outside. She just needed to choose a topic that the doctor wouldn't be able to resist talking about.

"W-wait, hold on! Maurice, I'll call you back. Now, what is it? What do you want?" The doctor demanded as he cut his phone call short and Piper had to think of something quickly as her rescuers carefully opened the door.

"Uhhhh, well...I was just curious, um..." She stuttered, trying to think of something juicy as Ray guided his sidekicks through the door, remembering how to navigate through it safely thanks to (y/n)'s shuffle technique. Good, they were inside the house, now they just had to creep through and then pounce. "Are you and Nurse Cohort, like a couple?"

"Ha!" Nurse Cohort snorted, not seeing how the three superheroes were shuffling their way over, (y/n) being mindful not to let her heels click on the wooden flooring. The assistant was blinded by her amusement anyway - Minyak was the last man she wanted to date, in her mind, there was only one.

"Did you just laugh?" Minyak asked in quite a hurt tone. Maybe he had a little crush on his hot helper, who knows.

"Uh, yeah. I was just, uh...laughing at Captain Man, Kid Danger and...Miss Danger on the TV." She lied, spitting out (y/n)'s name like venom. They stared at the screen, not knowing that the three were currently standing like statues behind them, making Jasper blanch when he clocked eyes on them. 

"I don't see what's so funny about them," Minyak replied, squinting at the nervous superheroes, which made Piper panic. She had to think of something else.

"So...have you and Nurse Cohort ever gone on a date?" She asked, realising that the doctor liked the woman more than he was letting on, not that she would ever go out with him. They were like the anti-Ray-and-(y/n), definitely not soulmates.

"Not an official date, but Nurse Cohort and I have one of those will-they-won't-they relationships," Minyak told her as Henry signalled for the kids on the couch to stay quiet, the three creeping closer and closer. 

"Hmmm, yeah, not really." The nurse replied, not feeling it for the oddball doctor. Yeah, they were colleagues, rarely seen part, but they didn't have that spark between them, no chemistry. They were partners, but not in that sense, just business, nothing more. 

"What? Are you going to pretend that you don't have a little crush on me?" Minyak smirked, getting a little too big-headed on how he thought women viewed him. Firstly, he was an evil villain, essentially a massive turn-off and he wasn't exactly charismatic, at least, not in a good way. 

"I don't have to pretend I don't have any kind of crush on you." She scoffed, not caring if she hurt the doctor's feelings. It was a little awkward to be in the middle of, making everyone's eyes switch back and forth as they argued. 

"Well...why not? I mean, is it me?" Minyak whined, throwing a mini-tantrum as he had his hopes crushed, sounding hurt enough to allow for a teeny-weeny-peeny amount of sympathy that disappeared when everyone remembered what a bastard he was underneath.

"Yeah." Nurse Cohort deadpanned, her face and voice emotionless as Ray, Henry and (y/n) waited for them to finish. They could move when they were both so close to the television, but thankfully, they were also too argumentative to turn to the side and see them.

"Oh, I see. And who, pray tell, do you have a crush on?" Minyak asked, not knowing whether he wanted to know the answer or not.

"Well..." Nurse Cohort smiled wistfully, glancing at the TV screen where a particular handsome hero was smiling absentmindedly, making (y/n) growl lowly as she got the message.

"Captain Man?! Him?!" Minyak spluttered, hating how she'd called for his worst enemy and (y/n) couldn't say she was too pleased either. Not because she thought Ray would leave her for that villainess, she trusted him, it just annoyed her that she thought she had a chance and gave him such goo-goo eyes. 

"Yeah, I think he's cute." Cohort sighed, making (y/n) fold her arms angrily as Ray couldn't help but be flattered. There was repulsion too, he hated Nurse Cohort as much as he hated her boss, but flattery never failed with him, even if it was from a bitch like her.

"She's not wrong." He smirked, running a hand through his hair as he basked in the praise. It was a dangerous game he was playing, his voice echoing as the microphone picked up him speaking into it and his voice coming from the TV speakers, but he couldn't help it. 

He knew he was easy on the eyes with an adorable personality to boot, yet he could never forget how only one person got to have that and call it theirs because they wanted his childishness, temper and irrationality to go with it. Why would he want Cohort, a woman who only saw the mask, muscles and fame, when he could go home to (y/n), the woman who loved all of him, the diamond and the rough?

"Shut up!" Minyak screeched at the screen, glaring at the cocky superhero and how he got to have his assistant's affections, not that he would ever accept them.

"Yeah, do shut up." (y/n) rolled her eyes, feeling all pouty at how he was loving someone else's attention. Her voice wasn't mean, just bored, like she didn't want to hear it. She just wanted to be the only one who called him cute as she was the only one who stuck through it all, pined through long, lonely nights and somehow came through the other side with him holding her, kissing her as she had merely dreamed of.

"Why don't you shut up, you whiny, worthless, little bitch? You won't be his girlfriend for long, Captain Man always moves on." The nurse spat, looking at the superheroine like she was dirt, analysing her super suit, mask and hair like they weren't good enough for her, or rather, too simple, not good enough for Captain Man.

"Why don't you say that to my face, floozy?" (y/n) retorted harshly, feeling Ray surge forward like he was going to do or say something, but she wanted to handle it alone. It was true, Captain Man had always moved on, it was her biggest fear in their relationship, being left behind for some younger, prettier girl, but she loved him and was certain that he loved her, enough to not want anyone else. She was special, Cohort wasn't.

"I just did, you silly little girl." The insults were going back and forth, Henry feeling (y/n)'s frustration and how she was feeling protective over the best thing she had. He understood why she hated Cohort and why she was being so prickly; if he had gone through years of doubt and pain, he'd be defensive too.

"Uhhh, turn around." Henry sighed, wanting to end this now before Cohort said something even worse and (y/n) did something she'd regret. Ray was sensing his girl's frustration too and made a mental note to calm and reassure her that whilst he was still getting over his ego, his love for her was still burning bright.

"Turn around? Don't see the point of that." Minyak muttered, proving once again that he's an idiot when he spun around with his eyes glued to the floor, meaning he never saw the superheroes standing behind him, not even when they were wearing bright red and blue costumes.

"Turn around and keep your head up," Ray instructed tiredly, not believing that had been momentarily caught unawares by this man; he was just so clueless. 

"Keep my head up?--" Minyak blanched as he saw the superheroes smirking at him, each holding a charged and ready-to-go blaster in their hand. It was funny to see him and Nurse Cohort so surprised, the latter not so cocky now her rival was only a couple of metres away.

"Surprise!" They cheered, the kids smiling brightly when they saw how the villains were panicking. They couldn't take on Captain Man and both his sidekicks, they were outnumbered and outgunned. Minyak untucked his heliometer from his belt, pointing it from Henry to Ray and (y/n), ordering Nurse Cohort to do the same, but the superheroes had them pinned with nowhere to go, well, they did, until he saw that he could still send Piper into space.

"Now, drop your weapons or else I'll send your president up through the roof and somewhere over the rainbow, where bluebirds die!" Minyak spat, making the three freeze before their enemy got trigger-happy. They saw Jasper sneaking around the corner and decided that they'd prefer him trying to disarm the doctor than letting Piper fly away.

"Okay, all right. We'll drop 'em." Ray said calmly, signalling for his sidekicks to copy his movements of dropping the blasters to the floor. Admitting defeat looked humiliating, but it wasn't all bad. because Jasper "James Bond" Dunlop was back in service.

"Ha! I've won again! Yes!---Argh!" Minyak's celebrations were cut short as the boy heroically jumped onto his back, tackling the doctor so he was no longer pointing his heliometer at Piper and the balloons.

"Don't move!" Cohort ordered the superheroes as they waddled hurriedly to go help the kid with his struggle, her gaze being pointed at (y/n) since she despised her the most. However, she wasn't expecting the boy and girl on the couch to leap up and blow an annoyingly loud horn in her face, stunning the nurse enough for them to push her onto an armchair and seize her crossbow laser.

"Ha! Nurse this!" The girl quipped, scaring the woman so much that she squealed and dashed for the door, leaving the doctor to fend for himself. It was every medic for themselves, apparently. "Get her!"

"Yeah, keep running, you coward! He's my boyfriend!" (y/n) shouted, loving how the woman wouldn't even stand and fight, she just...ran away. At least she was brave, even when she was scared shitless, she never left her friends behind.

"Love you." Ray turned and smiled at her, feeling his tummy fluttering when she called him hers so unabashedly. He loved that feeling, that she still wanted to put up with him and love him through everything.

"Love you too. Now, let's get this crap off." She blushed, feeling her moody pouting from earlier dissolve as they scrambled to unclip the harnesses. Jasper was struggling and urgently needed some professional help as he bashed Minyak's hands against the countertop in an attempt to make him drop his weapon. He couldn't keep it up forever.

Good thing they had Charlotte on hand, who had been watching everything, ditched the wig and had snuck in through the back so she could join the fight. Not physically, of course, she could hardly wield some kitchen scissors and save the day, but she could sneak over and cut the ropes keeping Piper tied to a sticky ending. The girl was flabbergasted to see her there but didn't complain when she started sawing away at the twine, freeing her as it frayed and snapped.

Ray, (y/n) and Henry shrugged themselves free of the board, just in time for Jasper being shoved across the floor as Minyak finally overpowered him. "You lost the grapple!"

Piper and Charlotte tried to run away, somewhere where they would be safe, but the doctor heard their footsteps and pointed the heliometer at them, not caring if they were children. He would make them fly if he had to. But not if Ray had anything to do with it. The superhero lunged forward lowering the man's arm and swiping his weapons away in the blink of an eye.

"Disarmed!" He smirked, pointing it at Minyak as (y/n) waved at Charlotte to get clear. This was their chance to get out of there and boy, did they run like hell.

"You give me that back!" Minyak snapped as he snarled at the three heroes like a cornered animal, his instincts telling him to get ferocious as he was left defenceless. 

"I don't want to," Ray replied, scoffing at the thought of doing what he said. That would just be stupid and he was stupid. Adorably dumb, yes, moronic, no.

"But I'll give you my palm," Henry said, looking down at his hand as he recalled how terrified his little sister had been and now, he had the man responsible in front of him and ready for a damn good beating. 

"Palm? What do you---" Minyak was too slow to ask and Henry's flat palm was trusted roughly into his nose, sending the doctor stumbling back into the balloon chair, which presented a fascinatingly perfect opportunity.

"Nice face-bump, kid." (y/n) smiled, loving how Henry was secretly taking revenge for what the villain had done to his family. He could never say it and show Piper how deeply he cared, but he could show it and let her know one per cent of the truth.

"Thanks, M-D. Hey, can I borrow that?" Henry turned to Ray, who happily handed the heliometer over to his sidekick since he had an idea of what he was planning to do and he was okay with it. Doctors deserve a vacation too, after all.

"Minyak, eyes front!" (y/n) barked, snapping the man out of his pain-filled haze and he looked up to see his own invention staring back at him.

"Wha---no, no, no, no, no! Don't use my own heliometer against me!" He whimpered, begging for mercy as Piper had done earlier. He hadn't shown her a shred of human decency yet he expected some now, like a coward.

"Why shouldn't I?" Henry spat, knowing that the man didn't deserve any compassion or kindness, not after what he had done. He deserved pain and suffering, he deserved to feel the same terror Piper had, but he knew of Kid Danger's morality and was hoping he could use that. 

"Well, it's too on-the-nose!" He replied, sounding rather pathetic and Ray and (y/n) couldn't help but snort and take the piss.

"Tell it to the bluebirds." Ray told him in a fake, British, "Mr Darcy-esque" voice that mocked the doctor's way of speaking. He had the pomp and air or superiority nailed and it spurred his companions on.

"I do hope they serve tea, crumpets and scones over the rainbow! Ta-ta!" (y/n) waved him goodbye, her arm tucked into Ray's as if they were a lady and her gentleman, as Henry blasted the heliometer's rays at the balloons, making them glow and fizz.

"Nooooooo!...Despite this comeuppance, I'll be back...eventually!" Minyak bellowed as he began to float through the ceiling, passing through the bedroom above and up into the sky, leaving the superheroes, plus Charlotte, Piper and Jasper to watch him go. 

"Yeah, sure you will, Schwarzenegger." (y/n) rolled her eyes at his overconfidence, turning to look up at Ray now that their work was finally done. She wanted to kiss him, he wanted to kiss her, but before either of them could move a muscle, an unexpected visitor arrived.

"Hey! I'm home!--" Mr Hart smiled brightly as he stepped through the door, only to grow speechless when he saw several perturbing things. Firstly, he had a crowd in his kitchen, including Captain Man, Kid Danger and Miss Danger, which was weird. Secondly, he had chunks of plaster, floorboard and dust scattered across his house, not to mention the damn holes in his roof and how he was going to have to pay to have it fixed. But he had one question in particular.

"Okay, is anyone I know dead?" He asked, making the group look around awkwardly. No one had any idea how to answer that, so they just preferred to stay silent and avoid eye contact. The teens stared at the roof and the tiny dot of Minyak passing through the clouds, but Ray, well, he had a better idea for a distraction.

(y/n) couldn't answer any questions with his lips on hers and neither could he. Yeah, that was a good plan and Mr Hart couldn't see very well since Ray navigated them to the back of the crowd. He was free to brush his fingers through her hair and curl an arm around her waist, certain that Henry would handle his dad's questions. They needed this, just them, a good plan and a good end for a crazy day.

[finitevariety]

writing a Problematic Greg Fic

[heliads]

whilst requests are open I have an idea to put forth after years of us discussing this man. Harry Hook x reader based on 'the way I loved you' by taylor swift. Childhood friends to lovers, to strangers to lovers again mayhaps? idk babes. Love you though, I hope your requests don't get out of hand again so you can stay stress-free!

eva i love you for sending this in, please let me talk about harry hook. he's insane and i cannot get enough of him

masterlist

You are lying on your bed in a dorm room in Auradon Prep, and if you close your eyes, you can almost convince yourself that you’re somewhere else entirely. Your roommate hung a lantern in the window, and with the glass pane cracked halfway, the light sways back and forth on the ceiling, painting shifting golden silhouettes on the perfectly painted ceiling. If you let the present world fade into the corners of your consciousness, you can pretend there are flaws in the endless pristine magnificence. You could even pretend that you aren’t on the continent at all.

No daughter of a princess should ever be anywhere but in Auradon. That’s the way it should have been, but you ran the second you got the chance and ended up amongst criminals and sons of thieves instead of with other prettily polished girls. Is it a terrible thing to admit that you miss it more than anything?

You shouldn’t, that’s the worst part. You left them willingly. As time passes, though, you’re starting to think that what you thought was one great fight with the so-called lowlifes of this world might have been the greatest time of your life. It’s like fording a raging river; while you’re in the thick of the waves, you think you might drown, but when you’re safe on the dry shore again, all you can think of is the coolness of the water, how the flood had sparkled like a thousand sapphires.

You shut your eyes and then you’re back again, just a kid, happier than you’ve ever been and twice as free. It had been easy to leave, actually, easier than it should have been. In your family, there were enough siblings and cousins and relatives that just one girl could go unnoticed. It’s not that Ariel intentionally tried to blur all of her daughters together in her memory, but it couldn’t be helped. She was one of seven daughters, and you were one of many as well. It wasn’t her fault, no, but it was your excuse anyway.

It turns out that nobody bats their eyes at a mermaid’s daughter when she’s running headlong towards the surf. You dove into the waves and came up to shore miles away. Your mother was terrified of losing any one of her children to the endless sea just as her father lost her to land, so none of you were allowed to stray that close to the beach. Of course you would see how far you could go the second you were unsupervised. Of course you would push the limits just to learn where you would break.

You ended up scaring the daylights out of a boy in a small sailing craft not far from the limits of the Isle of the Lost. You hadn’t meant to go that far, but you were giddy with the feeling of doing something wrong and he was trying to escape as well. He’d offered for you to hitch a ride with him so long as the wind was good. You thought that suited you well enough, so you took the hand he gave you and listened when he introduced himself as Harry Hook.

He said his name the same way you did, emphasis on the first name and not the last. It’s the exact opposite way any child of a prince or princess does, and you think that might have been why you liked him from the start. The sun shone overhead, and you talked to him about running away and taking to the sea and all the things you wanted to do if you just had time.

Neither of you wanted to leave, not really, but of course all good things have to come to an end at some point. You watched the sun sink lower and lower in the sky with all the dread of a doomed man going to the gallows. You must have looked seriously unhappy, because you remember Harry laughing and saying that you could meet him tomorrow, if you wanted. You wanted that more than anything, as it turned out, so you eagerly agreed.

Harry took you as far as he could towards Auradon again, and watched as you dove into the water. You can still remember how he’d watched you go, the way his eyes had tracked the water as if he could look at you forever, even after you disappeared from view. He stayed there for a long time before finally forcing his ship to turn around again. You’d know; you stayed there on the ocean floor watching him back until he was gone.

The next day, you slipped away to meet him again, and the next day, and the next. When you were caught trying to go out to the sea sometime in the second month, you fought until you could find a suitable excuse. Your mother was perfectly fine to let you go to some private school by the coast, it would mean one less child to keep track of. The papers were signed and agreements made before you could so much as blink.

You, of course, never went to that school. Instead, you showed up on Harry’s ship just like usual and told him that you wouldn’t be going back. Harry had been talking about a friend of his, Uma, and how she was forming a crew of her own larger pirate ship. You wanted in, and he couldn’t be more delighted to take you home.

You think you replayed the memory of him introducing you to Uma about a thousand times over in your head, and you’ll do it again tonight. The slats of the dock had been slippery under your feet, but you knew that so long as he was by your side, you would never once fall. Uma had looked at you questioningly, blue-green hair cascading down her shoulders, but Harry had hardly been able to tear his eyes away from you.

“This is Y/N,” he’d said, “she’s my friend.” He’d imbued the word with all the hope and grief and joy you could ever possibly attach to such an idea. Harry smiled as he said it, took your hand, let his eyes open comically wide so you’d know he was just joking when he mentioned that he’d jump overboard if Uma didn’t take you on.

Luckily for him, Uma had no problems with you. She saw something in you, the same sort of restless troublemaking spirit the rest of them had in spades. Before you knew it, you were quite literally learning the ropes of how to help out on Uma’s ship.

From there on out, everything was perfect. You watched the sun rise and set from the deck of a ship you could call home. When the weather was good, you spent all night and day out in the grasp of the world, and when the storms raged on, you hid belowdecks with the best friends you’d ever had. They wanted you, not your mother in a younger form, but you. Just you. It was wonderful.

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that you would end up falling in love with Harry. You were hurtling towards that fate as fast as you could, running and sprinting towards the inevitability of it all. No one compared. No one had half as much influence over you as him. And, when he finally managed to tell you how he felt, you thought you might be able to take over the entire world with the sheer force thrumming through your veins.

Perhaps you should have taken that as a warning. The universe doesn’t care much for happy endings, you’ve learned, even for its fairytale heroes. Princesses grow old and fade into obscurity. Princes forget how to save the day. Villains live out their days with fantastic dreams that will never be achieved. You learn how to deal with adequacy, and pretend that it is enough for you.

You loved Harry because he was wild, your untamed, brilliant boy, but then you hated him for it, too. Just once, you wanted to walk into a room and know what he was going to say before he said it. Every word from his mouth was a dagger in your chest. Some days, he was a hopeless romantic, others, he was mad and uncontrollable. He never hurt you, but at least the pain of a blow would be something you could depend on and understand.

Your mother tried to find you about a year or two after you took to the sea, and you used that as your excuse to break up with him. Harry found out you would be returning to Auradon at the exact same time as the rest of the crew. You think he might hate you for it still. You think he would have reason to hate you for a lot, actually, most importantly that you were never quite enough to match him.

So you slipped away from the ship with the worst kind of goodbye, one that you did not mean, and you never looked back. You greeted your mother and agreed when she said that it was time you took up your studies at Auradon Prep. You joined the endless number of would-be princesses and princes and pretended that it was all you had ever needed in life. If you woke up sometimes with the sound of waves crashing in your ears, or felt the steady rock of a ship beneath your feet as you dreamt, you ignored it. Such illusions only belong to the past, and they will never be yours again.

You still have a jacket of his in the corner of your room; you brought it all the way over here, anywhere you go. You never had the heart to give it back. You don’t know that you could if you tried. It still smells like saltwater and laughter and sun-bleached him, and you have absolutely no idea what you will do when that familiar scent fades.

Still, you weren’t able to completely erase his influence on you. Children of villains arrived at Auradon Prep, and instead of running away from them, you befriended them as quickly as you could. Mal thinks like you do, her and the rest. You laugh like them– not quite as polite as you should be, but loud and beautiful and real. You hang out with them all the time and, when they talk about how much they wish they were back on the Isle of the Lost, you lie to yourself that you do not agree.

You never told them the full scope of your exploits, but they know part of it, enough that one day Mal knocks at your door and tells you that she needs your help on a pirate ship. She needs to get something from the Isle of the Lost, a mysterious ingredient for a spell, but they have to keep it a secret so they can’t use the bridge. The next best option, then, is to sail. It’s not a far destination, so it would work.

A thousand memories of sun and surf flash through your head, and you find yourself agreeing before Mal can so much as finish trying to convince you to go along with her plan.

Mal blinks in surprise. “Really? You’re sure? I thought you would have mixed feelings about that time in your life.”

You breathe out slowly, trying to calm yourself. “Certain things scare me more than others.” Certain people, that is.

Mal winces as she leads you out of your dorm and back into the hallway. “Actually, we might have a problem with that.”

You frown. “What do you mean?”

Mal casts you a nervous glance. “Before I continue, remember that you already agreed. I’m not letting you leave now.”

You laugh. “I’m starting to get worried. No, Mal, I’m not backing out. Just tell me already.”

Mal holds up her hands in mock surrender. “Okay, okay. Never doubted you for a second. It’s just, well, we don’t have a ship at our disposal, obviously, so we’re borrowing one from Uma.”

You shrug. “I have no problem with that. Uma’s great.”

“Yeah,” Mal says, drawing out her syllables in an attempt to buy herself time, “but she insisted on having a skeleton crew present. You know, to make sure we wouldn’t run aground or something like that. That includes her first mate.”

Your head snaps up. “Harry’s going to be there?”

You can feel Mal’s gaze on you, but you refuse to look at her. Instead, you’re scanning the hallway, every door you pass, sure that he’s going to be waiting for you, leaning casually against a wall or peering out of a window or somewhere you could find if you just looked hard enough.

“He is,” Mal confirms, “is that going to be an issue?”

Yes. “No, I’ll be fine.”

You can’t really tell if Mal believes you or not, but then you’re rounding the corner and the rest of the VKs are in front of you, and the conversation must be dropped as Mal explains her plan. You’re going to join the four of them and Uma’s guys in piloting the ship over to the Isle of the Lost, where you’ll search for a talisman hidden somewhere on the island. Once the talisman is secured, you’ll head back. Easy as that.

Mal leads your group to a boathouse on the southern part of the shore. You take up a position in a corner of the room, hidden by the shadows. You suppose that’s why the pirates don’t see you immediately when they come in a matter of minutes later. You suppose you chose that place on purpose so you could get a good look at Harry without him seeing you.

He looks just the same. You don’t know why you thought he would change, that he would have to look different to explain how different you feel, but he’s the same. It makes a soft smile rise to your lips at the same time as the weight of all your memories pierces you through the heart.

Uma’s talking to Mal, doubt lacing her every word. “I hope you have a good idea of how to run a ship, because I don’t think any of your friends have the slightest clue what to do on the sea. That’s my territory, in case you forgot.”

“I know,” Mal says, temper just as strong as always, “that’s why I brought a friend.”

Harry arches a brow. “What friend?”

“That would be me,” you say, and step out of the shadows to face him.

For a moment, you swear that time stands still. Harry’s breath catches in his chest as he looks at you for the first time in months. He has never been one to show off weakness, always laughing off injury or claiming not to feel pain, but in this instant, you can see the shock lancing through his eyes, wracking his frame until he has no choice but to stand there and stare.

Uma breaks the silence, wrapping an arm around your shoulders with a grin. “Y/N, good to see you! I take it back, Mal. Y/N could captain a fleet of ships with her eyes closed.”

It’s easy, after that, to pull yourself together. Uma’s friendship is something familiar, a rock you can stand on. “I appreciate your confidence,” you reply, “good to see you too, by the way.”

“Of course,” Uma says dismissively, then adds somewhat unnecessarily, “Hey, Harry, look who it is!”

Harry swallows hard when Uma addresses him, tries to pretend he’s just like normal. “Yeah, I saw. Hey, Y/N.”

“Hey yourself,” you say quietly.

Evie looks at you nervously, then quickly speaks up. “So, should we get to the ship? We only have so much time before people start looking for us.”

Uma rolls her eyes. “Yeah, yeah, you guys are too popular, I get it. Ship’s docked outside.”

Harry takes this as his excuse to bolt out, and you watch him go with wide eyes. Evie heads over to you as soon as everyone’s attention is off you again. “Hey, is everything alright?”

“Perfectly fine,” you whisper back through gritted teeth. Of course it is a lie. You couldn’t be more affected by this.

You avoid Harry the entire duration of the trip over to the Isle of the Lost. It’s difficult, especially when you push off from the shore and the wind is on your face again and everything is just like you remember. You tug a few lines into place, tie them down with the knots he taught you, and race to the bow as soon as you’re free.

You forgot just how wonderful it is to sail. You laugh delightedly as the ship picks up speed, skipping over the waves as the wind snaps the sails almost to bursting. This close to the surface of the water, you can’t hear anything, but you sense something anyway, and that’s how you know to lean back up and look to your side to see Harry standing there, smiling as he takes in the sight of you.

Your laugh dries up in a moment and you feel frozen there, trapped in this moment with him. Someone calls your name a second later and you’re able to spirit away to safety, but you can still feel his gaze burning like a brand into your back every moment until the ship docks at the Isle.

Mal announces that you’ll be splitting up in pairs so you can properly canvas the island for the talisman. Before you can look at her or Evie, Uma suggests that you and Harry work together, and the rest are already partitioned into pairs before you can fight it.

Fine, then. You’re certain he’s put her up to this, but you won’t give him a scene if he wants it. Instead, you march resolutely towards your assigned location, and pretend that you’re just really invested in finding the talisman so you can’t hear him when he tries to talk to you.

Eventually, Harry has enough and puts his hand on your arm, trying to get your attention. You spin back around by reflex, dagger in hand and held to his throat before Harry can get so much of a word out. The Isle has always brought out a different part of you, more of a villain than any princess’ daughter.

Instead of looking afraid, Harry just laughs. Usually, this is the time at which you’d join in, but you narrow your eyes and hold strong.

“Easy, sweetheart,” he says when he’s finally able to get his laughter under control, “I don’t think your friends would like it very much if you killed someone on your little vacation to the island.”

You glare at him. “We’re not friends anymore, sweetheart, or have you forgotten that already?”

“When your knife is to my throat? Couldn’t forget that if I tried. Out of curiosity, why are we enemies again? I seem to remember you liking me very well just a couple of months ago.” Harry says, reaching up to tap your forearm where you still hold your blade.

You pull your dagger away but stand there still, thrumming with the urge to run. “We’re too different. You’re a villain, and I’m a perfect angel, obviously.”

Harry grins. “What, just because you’re the daughter of a princess? You’ve never let that come in between us before. You’re not Ariel, you’re Y/N, and I have always loved that about you.” Something like doubt flickers across his face. “Is that why you left? You thought you had to become more like her?”

You glance away from him, suddenly unable to look him in the eyes. “I left because I had to. We weren’t working out.”

“Why not?” Harry asks, and suddenly he’s the one in control now, he’s the one stepping forward until your back hits the wall and you have nowhere to run, “What was so wrong with us, Y/N?”

Your hands are shaking. Harry takes the knife from you, carefully sliding it back in the holster on your side. His hands linger there a second longer, and when he finally takes them away, you can’t tell if you’re glad of it or deeply unhappy that you can no longer feel him.

“We could never work,” you insist.

“Why not?” He replies, “Show me we could never work. Prove me wrong.”

Harry Hook has always been somewhat of an enigma to you, just as unpredictable as the sea that both of you love, but somehow you know it’s coming when Harry leans forward and kisses you. For a moment, you consider pushing him away, and then you realize that you do not hate this, not him, not in the slightest, not at all.

Surrender is not the worst thing in the world. Sometimes it’s like the release of a sail to the wind, the acceptance that even though you let a person go, they will always come back to you. You surrender the last of your inhibitions and you kiss him back. It is everything you missed, the fighting and the laughing, the good times and the bad all in one. It is all that you love about him and more, what you didn’t realize you held most dear until you were gone.

Harry breathes quietly against your lips and you breathe back, one small circle of in and out and together. He grins, says, was that really so bad? And you laugh and tell him to shut up, so he does, but only by kissing you again. The island can wait, the talisman and the life waiting back for you at school. You have your boy back, and you could not care about anything else.

requested by @thatfangirl42, i hope you enjoy!

disney tag list: @rogueanschel, @lovesanimals0000, @/thatfangirl42, @amortensie

[reobsessed]

Luis' Lab Partner

Pairing: Reader X Luis Content Warning: 18+, minors DNI, slight humour, protected sex, AFAB reader, Reader x Luis Sera fic. Special thanks to Suri for reads and edits!

Summary: You'd been working many long nights at Umbrella, with only your work and your smooth-talking lab partner to keep you company. One night during a particularly lengthy experiment, the two of you take a break to read some 'online smut'. One thing leads to another and you find yourself undressed, thrown over the top of Luis' desk.

Fic under the cut!

“Senorita, I have to ask, what does it mean by ‘he thrust deep into me, his cock battering my cervix relentlessly’?”

“Luis, I’m gonna be completely honest, I have no fucking clue,” you stated, pinching the cigarette from Luis’ mouth and inhaling deeply.

“It’s rather abstract…” Luis scratched the back of his head in confusion. The two of you were currently hunched over Luis’ work computer. The only source of lighting in the room came from the painfully bright light of the CRT monitor, casting your faces in an ominous white glow.

Time always passed slowly in the lab whilst you were waiting for results. Today had been a particularly gruelling experiment and despite it very rapidly turning to the early hours of the morning, you both still had a long wait ahead of you.

“It’s just like porn but with words.”

Luis laughed and did his best to sound shocked. “A lady such as yourself watching porn?? How scandalous,” he remarked with a glint in his eye, or perhaps it was the light playing tricks.

You tapped the shared cigarette on the side of Luis’ mug, watching as the powdered ash dropped into the remainder of his coffee.

The pair of you had been working together for quite some time now, the pleasant small talk you exchanged towards the beginning had quickly grown stale given that neither of you really did anything outside of work. Whilst you were happy to sit in silence like you’d done previously with other colleagues, Luis wouldn’t allow it. He was by no means annoying or obtrusive but he always made an effort to engage with you, small things like, how did you sleep last night? Have you ever read Don Quixote? What food do you like? Would you like to read Don Quixote? By all rights you should have found him annoying but there was something quite charming about him. 

“You know what we’re doing right now is basically the same as watching porn together.” You paid close attention to Luis’ expression, fully intending to get as much amusement out of his reaction as possible.

Luis choked on air. “Th-that’s not- it’s not the- I have to go check on some vials,” he announced, springing to the floor in a rigid stance. You suppressed a giggle, watching as he ran behind one of the desks and pretended to look for something.

Reading together in the dark lab had become a tradition for the two of you, it first began when Luis had brought along a heavily worn copy of Don Quixote to read. Unfortunately your busy work schedule didn’t leave much time for reading and so Luis had read it aloud for you while you worked. He managed several chapters a night depending on how late you were working and surprisingly he’d breezed through the entire novel in a matter of weeks. Luis had given it his all and you deeply appreciated how he brought the characters to life, giving each a distinctive voice, you enjoyed it so much in fact that once it was over you were unable to hide your sadness. 

You’d both agreed to find more things to read, these came in the form of: every single magazine in the break room, the umbrella health and safety pamphlet and finally, each of  Harold’s work diaries that he’d left scattered throughout the labs (that was when they found out he really didn’t like Luis.)  You cursed yourselves for not bringing along more books. That was when you had an idea, why not go online for some ‘fine literature’. And that’s where you found yourselves tonight, sat in a darkened room reading online smut.

“You coming back or should I find another one?” you called out, mouse already skimming over various links in the forum.

“I’ll just be a second,” came the stammered response from across the room. 

“We can read something else. I just thought it would be funny.” You stood up, making your way over to where Luis was. “Sorry if I made things awkward…” you trailed off, your eyes studying Luis carefully. “What are you doing?”

“I just needed a moment to… catch my breath.” His back was turned to you but the embarrassment in his voice was clear.

“You know,” you began, edging closer as you spoke. “It gets lonely being cooped up in a lab all day.” Luis’ head spun round and he flinched back slightly when he noticed you were standing directly in front of him.

“I’m always here to keep you company, senorita.”

“I know,” you replied, reaching out a hand towards his chest, Luis stopped you, clasping your hand gently in his.

“Perhaps we get to work, ey?”

“I don’t want to and clearly you don’t either,” you said pointing your gaze downwards.

Luis attempted to cover himself but it was too late, even in the dark of the room his growing lust was painfully obvious. 

“Ah that’s not very gentlemanly of me,” Luis laughed nervously.

“I like your carefree side better.” 

You stepped forward once again, closing the gap between you. Instinctively, Luis reached out his hands and put them either side of your hips, eliciting a gasp in response. Despite being the one to initiate you were still taken aback by the sudden contact. You’d spent many days and nights together but you’d rarely touched, there was the occasional brushing of fingertips when exchanging coffee, a pat on the shoulder followed by an earnest ‘well done,’ and of course, your most intimate act so far, a shared cigarette passed back and forth between your lips. 

Your arms reached upwards, looping around Luis’ neck, you pulled his head down towards you and planted a long awaited kiss on his lips. It only lasted a second but you felt as though a current were running throughout your entire body even after pulling away. Luis stared at you momentarily, mouth agape, until it widened into one of his signature grins. 

“Dios Mios,” he exclaimed softly. “It would be rude not to follow the lady’s example.” He brought his lips back down to yours and kissed you passionately, threading a hand through your hair as he did so. 

Delighted, you leaned into his touch, lapping desperately at his tongue, only ever having tasted him through cigarettes you were desperate to get your fill. The kiss intensified and so did your grip on the back of Luis’ shirt. The two of you stumbled backwards with Luis steadying himself with one hand.

“Perhaps a change of position is in order,” he announced, picking you up by the waist and setting you down on one of the desks. 

“Stuff’s in the way,” you said, swiping your hand across various notes and test tubes. Luis winced as the glass shattered on the floor. “It’s okay, Umbrella’ll pay for it.” You’d already discarded your lab coat and were halfway through undoing your blouse.  

Luis looked conflicted for a moment, that was until his gaze landed on your now exposed cleavage.

“Mi amor.” He let out a breathy sigh before burying his head in the ripened fruits. His hands fumbled with the back of your bra. His mind was clouded in a lustful haze, impairing his ability to complete simple tasks. “Mierda,” he muttered impatiently, hands still grappling with the metal hook of your bra. 

Both amused and agitated you began pulling off Luis’ lab coat and then quickly moved to his jeans. In the time it took you to remove both articles of clothing, he was still trying in vain to remove your bra. 

“Can’t be good at everything,” you giggled. Luis laughed in return, unclipping your bra in an instant.

“You’ll pay for such hurtful remarks,” Luis threatened light-heartedly. He dragged down your trousers and underwear, dropping them to the floor along with his jeans. Without another word he nestled his tongue between your legs, eliciting a high pitched moan from his lab partner. He gave extra care and attention to your clit, lapping at it firmly and greedily. You wiggled your hips in pleasure, grasping fistfuls of Luis’ hair in your hands, as you pushed his head further into your throbbing clit.

The force of your fingers pulling on his hair caused Luis to let out a stifled groan, despite the pain he continued to lap at you until his mouth and stubble were fully wetted with your dripping contentment. 

“Luis- fuck- just stick it in already,” you cried out between gasps.

Luis pulled away, dabbing at the side of his mouth with his thumb. “If you insist,” he smirked, pulling open one of the desk drawers and retrieving a condom from inside. Printed on the front of the pack was a stark red and white umbrella logo, along with the slogan ‘Our Business is Life Itself’, Luis couldn’t help but chuckle at the irony.

“Seriously, Luis? You keep those in your desk?”

“What?? They’re company issued,” Luis explained innocently.

“Oh, right, so they just hand out a condom with every beaker or something?”

“Err they do for me,” he gave a half shrug, half laugh as he tore open the packet and slid the condom over his awaiting dick. He turned to look at you, before shaking his head. “Ah, this won’t do, that looks a little uncomfortable.” He grabbed the clothing from the floor, bundling it into a makeshift pillow that he slid underneath your head. You smiled at his attentiveness, reaching up to peck him on the lips once more.

Luis positioned himself on top of you, sliding in with ease. You both moaned as he settled himself inside of you. “Are you feeling alright?” He cupped one side of your face in his hand as he waited for an answer.

“Doing just fine,” you grinned in response, bucking your hips against Luis. 

Luis responded by matching your rhythm, pushing in and out, the room was filled with the sounds of your heavy panting along with the clatter of the remaining items left on the desk.

Luis fought hard to suppress his overflowing pleasure. He gripped the edge of the table with one hand and used the other to pull one of your legs up over his shoulder. The new position gave him a better angle to pound into your most sensitive parts.

“Ah, more,” you gasped. Your rising contentment threatened to boil over as you felt your head swim. “Luis,” you called out in desperation. You gripped onto his arms, your eyes watering and pleading.

He peppered kisses down your neck.

“It’s okay mi amor.” The gentle caress of his voice gave your aching body permission. 

Like a flash of lightning your mind went blank, all thoughts emptied as you sought only satisfaction. An electrifying pulse coursed through you as your entire body trembled as you writhed against Luis.

“Ah, ah fuck,” you cried out as you collapsed in bliss.

Luis followed soon after, crumpling beside you. You both laid in silence besides the occasional panting of breath. Luis carefully slid out of you and grabbed his lab coat from the floor, throwing it over the two of you.

“Hey, Luis?”

“What is it,” he mumbled as he dug through his pockets searching for his lighter.

“Did you hit my cervix or not?”

“Hmm maybe, maybe not. Perhaps we can try again another time?” he quirked an eyebrow in sync with his cigarette lighting up.

You struggled to suppress the blush that burned across your cheeks, holding his hand closely in yours.

Umbrella was really going to have to start issuing more condoms.

[gay-dorito-dust]

Hey!! I was wondering if you could do an Anthony Lockwood x fem reader and could you do these prompts please.

"Your lucky your cute"

"Wait, you think I'm cute"

"Was that your first kiss?"

Please take your time!! I do not want you to rush lol. Thank you!!! P.S I LOVE YOUR LATEST LOCKWOOD FIC.

Well this one took me a bit to get back to lmao but here ya go! 🦦

‘You got hurt again?” You said in disbelief, hauling Lockwood into the kitchen, sitting him into the closest chair by the table whilst you rummaged through cabinets for the first aid kit. ‘It’s not that bad.’ Lockwood replied, thinking he was being reassuring about his situation and sure maybe in some reality it might’ve been, but unfortunately for him that kind of reality only ever exists within ones head.

‘Not that bad?’ You reiterated while making sure to emphasising each word as you stopped your search for the first aid kit temporarily to read your head over your shoulder and stare incredulously at the boy as he stared back, shrugging his shoulders; Only to since when the action pulled at the wound there. “Lockwood! You’ve bleed all over the floor!” You exclaimed, gesturing to the blood trail that lead out into the hallway and up to the front door where you found him beforehand.

“Oh.” He uttered under his breath.

“Yeah, oh.” You spat, turning back to the cabinets, found the first aid kit and brought it with you to the table before cracking it open with a sigh as you brought out the necessities, displaying them out in front of you in the order that you needed them in. Meanwhile Lockwood took notice of how unsteady your hands were as you spaced out the bandages and the fuses from each other. Almost as though you were trying to preoccupy not only your hands but also your mind that of which raced with a million thoughts an minute of the what ifs.

Lockwood didn’t know what made him feel worse, knowing you were worrying yourself to death over him or knowing that he worried you so badly to the point you couldn’t hide your fear without it coming out through your body in one way or another. “Hey.” He says softly, moving his uninjured hand over your own, frowning slightly when he felt the abundance of worry course through your hand from wrist to finger tip. In an effort to console you, Lockwood ran his thumb across your knuckles. “I’m sorry I worried you so much-” “-That an gross understatement.” You muttered. “-but I’m within your hands now,” his hand squeezed yours for emphasis as he smiled softly, “I’m here, I’m safe, I trust you to not break me further.” He finished.

His eyes never strayed from yours the entire time he spoke. In fact his eyes remained glued to them; determined to providing you comfort which was a thing he always did that you weren’t so certain on how you should feel. You didn’t know whether to admire him for it or condemn him for putting the well-being’s of others well before his own. All you did however was sigh deeply, “Anthony Lockwood, your lucky you’re cute.” Once the words left your mouth, you felt the ice cold fear spread within your chest, forcing the air from your lungs, leaving you breathless.

You didn’t know what to do and it seemed that neither did your body as it involuntarily froze on itself purely out of impulse. Your throat was close to clogging up and becoming tight with anxiety as you manage to force out an, ‘ignore that.’ Unaware of the boyish grin that overtook Lockwood’s face as he leant closer. “Wait, you think I’m cute?” He asked, smile growing somewhat even wider as his eyes, that were usually a lot darker in colour, were now bright and reinvigorated with new life. “And I said ignore that!” You exclaimed, becoming a tad more embarrassed at your current circumstances.

“I’ve made things awkward between us, I get it, but can we please pretended that I never said what I said. At least long enough for me to patch you up so we can move on from this in blissful ignorance.” You rambled, averting your eyes from his in turn to look at a particular area of the thinking cloth as though it’s contents held all the answers you needed in this very moment. You knew you felt something for Lockwood but now that it was out thanks to your unfiltered mouth, you never felt more disgusted in the feelings you’ve long harboured for your employer and friend. It felt taboo and wrong from a workplace standpoint but it felt just as weird and unwarranted from a friendship standpoint; It didn’t matter how you looked at it because in the end all you could see ahead was anything but good.

Lockwood frowned deeply. “Who said you made things awkward between us?” You didn’t answer, too preoccupied with how advantageous it would be to go invisible right now. “You can’t avoid this y/n.” He attempts again to trick you into conversation but once again you didn’t make a peep, completely immersed in the logic that of you were to avoid the topic of conversation then it didn’t exist. However with Lockwood wanting to get to the depth of it didn’t make avoiding it’s existence any better. “Can you at least look at me?” Lockwood said, exasperated.

Silence permeated the kitchen as the sounds of your breathing were the only thing filling your ears other then the blood rushing through them. Both of you were desperate for opposing reasons and weren’t willing to give into the others whims so easily considering how stubborn you both were. You didn’t want Lockwood to know the truth.He was determined in getting to the truth without having to push you to uncomfortable levels to get it; There was a silent tug of war going on and at some point one of you were going to have to given in.

When you heard Lockwood sigh, you thought he had finally had enough and was about to leave the room to find George or Lucy to patch him up instead but when you felt a hand slide under your chin, cradling your jaw as though it were made out of porcelain, forcing it up so that you were back to being eye level with Lockwood. “There you are.” He cooed, his thumb rubbed against your jawline softly. “Why can’t you just let this go,” you spoke, “why does it matter so much to you to know whether or not what I said was genuine?”

His hand crept to the back of back of your head, cushioning it with his palm as he slowly brought you in close when Lockwood noticed that there weren’t much restraint on your behalf, allowing him to rest his forehead against yours. “There’s a reason for that love, but I prefer to show then tell but that’s only applicable if this is alright with you.” He says, looking deep within your eyes for hesitance, for rejection, for anything that told him to stop while he was ahead but instead he just you. Beautiful, beautiful you staring back at him. “Won’t you regret it afterwards?” You asked, taking in how you were locked in a situation where he was all you could see, all you could smell, all you could hear, all you could feel; So much so that anything outside of him didn’t matter in that moment that not even the sound of your heart and the sudden hitch in your breath didn’t register with you.

Nothing other then Anthony Lockwood felt real to you.

“Regret something I’ve been yearning to do for a long while now? Never.” He told you before moving in to press his lips against yours. They’re simultaneously soft and chapped but to a degree where despite their contrasting feel, they made for the most unique experience. Upsettingly for you the kiss finished as soon as it started when you felt Lockwood start to pull away with a dopey grin. “Was…was that your first kiss?” He asked and once again you felt a tad embarrassed. “Yeah…” you trailed off, about to look away from him again when he moved his head so he would still be within your line of sight.

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of.” He tells you, still smiling like a goofball. “That just means we got plenty more opportunities to practice in the future.” You smacked his uninjured arm at the insinuation of his words, causing him to laugh, before bringing yourself back to reality as to why you were brought here to begin with as you gasped.

“What, what is it?” Lockwood asked on high alert.

“You’re still fucking injured!” You cried.

Lockwood only smirked, “was our first kiss as a couple that magical that it made you forget my injuries?” He obviously wasn’t taking this as seriously as you were. Typical Lockwood behaviour.

“Anthony Lockwood I swear to fucking god, I’ll sow your mouth shut-“ “then how will you kiss me if my mouth is sewn shut?” Anthony cuts you off cheekily, enjoying the effect he was currently having over you.

“I fucking hate you.” You tell him as you start clearing the wound on his arm, smiling to yourself whenever you felt him flinch beneath you. Serves the fucker right for teasing you.

[athenaderiva]

Heyy it's MJ right?

I saw your post about being ill, I hope you feel better soon!

I thought maybe some Percy x reader headcanons would be nice? With some fake-dating to lovers?

I honestly don't really mind, just love me some Percy :))

Thank you! Starting to work slowly through the requests now as yesterday was my Grandad's funeral. I'm so grateful to everyone who sent them in 🤍🤍

Fake Dating to Lovers, Percy de Rolo x Reader

- the two of you didn't really get along at first. when you joined Vox Machina, his exact words were "we don't need another arsehole".

- appropriately, you flipped him off.

- you never really found a need to interact with each other besides snide remarks and half hearted insults that neither of you really believed.

- until the rest of the team decided you were a perfect distraction for a long con.

- the two of you were forced to play a loving, engaged couple. him some young noble from a far off land, you his fiancée from a nearby town.

- you hit a few bumps to start with. he gripped your hand all too tightly, squeezing till it felt your knuckles would pop out of place.

- he refused to share the bed with you so he slept on the floor. which would have been chivalrous, if he hadn't taken the warmest blankets with him.

- you would step on his feet while the two of you danced. he was never quite sure whether it was intentional (it was) or if you were just clumsy.

- you're not sure when it happened, but something changed.

- maybe it was in the way your bodies fit together whilst you danced.

- maybe it was the way he smiled at you when you were pretending to be in love around the nobles you were staying with.

- maybe it was in the way your hand moulded with his and he thought it felt like you had been built for him.

- maybe it was in the way he was transfixed just by watching you brush your hair.

- you began to help him when he couldn't sleep. pulling him into the bed and holding him when the nightmares came.

- he found himself blushing whenever he heard you laughing.

- wishing he knew how to make it happen himself.

- goosebumps started appearing on your skin when he ran his thumb over your knuckles.

- the nobles you were staying with as a way to keep them busy whilst vox machina destroyed their reputation (they had done a lot of wrong to their workers and the town they lorded over) began to suspect you weren't truly engaged.

- so Percy held your face, brushed your hair from your eyes, and kissed you.

- and you couldn't breathe but it was in the best way. your body relaxed against him as he used just the right amount of pressure.

- from then, the two of you were inseparable.

- Vax and Vex teased Percy about it the second you were all reunited. Keyleth was just so happy for her best friend. Scanlan was, well, Scanlan. Pike took money from him after winning their bet that this would happen. Grog was a little confused but happy for the two of you.

- Percy kept the ring that they had used for the fake engagement. He tinkered with it and refined the jewel, and after a year, he gave it to you once more, this time in genuine.

- you pulled him to his feet without answering him and held him as tight as you could, nodding your head against his shoulder.

[marvelwitchergilmore]

Saying “I Love You.”

Summary: Dean Winchesters x Fe!Reader ~ The four times Dean Winchester said “I love you.” and the one time you meant it as something more. 

FLUFF! FLUFF! FLUFF! (mentions of periods, kissing, falling in love and like, one swear word)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

The first time Dean Winchester told you he loved you, it was when he got back from Hell. Not straight away, though. It had been after a werewolf hunt. It had been pretty simple for this kind of hunt. 

Sam was still inside the motel room, fast asleep. You knew Dean hadn’t been sleeping much since he got back, waking up with terror in his eyes. More than usual. 

The morning had been cold, the icy mist and fog slowly settling across the fields across from them. The motel they found was in the middle of nowhere. Much like the pack had been. 

Dean looked back, hearing the motel door open and close. You stepped out, your body wrapped in a pair of jeans, a long henley - one that, let’s be honest, probably belonged to one of the boys - a flannel (also their’s) and a thick woolen jumper along with a pair of boots on your feet. 

“Hey,” you smiled. Your voice was quiet. The first word of the day. 

Dean smiled seeing your hair, slightly messy from sleep. Your face was slowly growing in colour and your eyes were still showing tiredness. 

“Hey,” Dean said back. 

He was leaning against the Impala, watching the fog and mist across the grass, a cup of coffee in his hand. Dean didn’t really know how long he’d been up, but it was long enough for his coffee to be colder than it should have been. 

“You weren’t in bed.”

You and Dean had shared a bed that night. Like every night. You had been hunting with him since Sam left for college. It was both your own solo hunt and Dean’s. You worked it together. You stuck together after that. 

Neither of you really could remember why or how you both decided to stick together but it was better together than alone, so that was something. 

Dean seemed to dodge the statement all together, reaching round behind him. “I got you coffee. It’s probably cold by now but-”

“Thank you,” you smiled. “I love it.”

Dean smiled back before taking a drink and looking back to the fog. 

“You can talk to me, you know. I won’t tell Sam if you really don’t want me to.”

You could see the look in his eyes. Distant. Lost. 

“Dean?”

You placed a gentle hand on his upper arm, and that was when he looked at you. 

“I love you.” Dean blurted out, looking at you. No, not looking at you. Looking into you. Like his entire head was talking to you through telekenisis, letting you know about everything he wished he could say outloud. 

“Not in the “I’m-madly-in-love-with-you.” way, so, you don’t have to look so worried.” Dean said with a small laugh. “I just...you’re my family. You and Sam. And, I love you.”

You gave him a light smile. He’d tell you when he’s ready. 

“I love you, too.”

You placed a long kiss to his cheek before landing back on your feet. 

“Next time you wanna leave in the middle of the night, at least leave me a blanket. You are my designated human heater.” You joked, finding a smile spread on Dean’s face. 

“Sure.”

- - - - - - - - - - 

The second time Dean Winchester told you he loved you was during a hunt. It was just a quick one. One that was so flippant that you didn’t even realise either of you had said it until Sam brought it up later that night while Dean was at a bar and you were left with Sam in the motel room. 

You were, once again, pretending to be FBI agents. You were interviewing a couple of suspects and speaking to local police when you were given a lead. You would call Sam and search it out together whilst Dean stayed back at the Police Department so check out a few more things. 

“Just, be careful?” Dean had asked you before you left the station. 

You smiled and gave a nod. “I will.”

“Okay. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Other people who had heard around the station just gathered you were partners in both work and life so didn’t really question it. Sam, however...this had been the first time he’d heard it. 

“So, what was all that about earlier?”

“What was all what?” You asked, your eyes not leaving the case files in front of you. 

You had found Dean a few hours ago still at the sation in the back. The lead Detective, when you walked in, pointed you to the room. 

“He’s been in there since you left.”

“Thanks.”

You walked in slowly. Dean was sat at a small desk, his tie off, his top buttons undone and his hair a little messy but in an attractive way. Not that you would tell him that. It would probably only boost his ego. 

You had to basically drag him to the bar. 

The last couple of weeks, Dean had been getting too far into the work. Hell, Sam was beginning to spend more and more time at a bar than researching. And his time at being at both hadn’t changed. 

“All that before. The...I love you.” Sam smiled. 

You thought back. “Oh. Oh, yeah. It’s just...what we said. We’re family. It’s normal.”

Sam gave a smirk. “The only time Dean has ever told me he loves me, to my face, in actual human words is when one of us is dying.”

You looked up to Sam across the room and smiled. “Well, maybe it’s about time we said ‘I love you’ without any of us dying. Sam, he didn’t mean nothing by it. Not in the way you’re thinking.”

Sam smiled. “I- I’m not thinking anything.”

“Yes, you are. And you can stop. We’re good friends, Sam. You and Dean...you’re my family.”

“Alright.”

“Stop.”

Sam couldn’t hide his smile. “Okay, okay. But, just tell me one thing?”

“What?” you asked. 

“Will you make Cas wear a dress as Maid-of-Honour?”

You rolled your eyes and threw one of the library books at Sam’s head. 

- - - - - - - - - - - 

The third time Dean Winchester said ‘I love you’ was in the afternoon not long after they found the Bunker. 

Sam had gone on a run, Charlie was sat at the table typing away in her own little world and Dean was out on a beer run. 

And yourself, you were stood in the kitchen cooking the first decent meal you’d all had in a long, long time. 

“Hey!” Dean caught Charlie’s attention before he threw her a bag of chips. 

“Oh, my god, you found them?!” Charlie smiled. 

“Last in the store. You’re welcome. And for the chef for the evening,” Dean pulled out a bottle of orange soda. One they hadn’t sold in years. Not anywhere outside of your home town, anyway. 

You smiled and took the bottle from him. “Aw-ww. Thank you. I can’t believe you found this.”

“Yeah, apparently they changed manufacturer a few years ago.”

“Well, thank you.” You jumped up and kissed his cheek before remembering you had something for him. 

“Pie? You- You baked me a pie?” Dean asked as you lifted it from the counter. 

“One fresh cherry pie. Just for you.” 

“Just for-” Dean looked from the pie to you with a wide smile before he pulled you in for a tight hug. “Have I ever told you how much I love you? Because I do. So much. I love you, so, so much.”

You smiled and let out a laugh. 

“Hey, I helped!” Charlie called out from the table before she scrambled out from the bench and over to both of you, joining the hug. 

- - - - - - - - - - - -

The fourth time Dean Winchester told you he loved you, it had been much like second. It was just flippant. Said casually as if it came off his lips and tounge every single day. And, let’s be honest, it did. 

He might not have said the words ‘I love you’, but he said them in other ways. In the ways he made you coffee in the morning. How, after a night of drinking, you didn’t even open your eyes as you walked into the kitchen and grabbed what you thought had been a coffee pot. 

“Why does my coffee taste of apples?”

Dean was soon beside you. “That’s because it’s apple juice.” He took the cup from your hand and placed his own coffee mug in it’s place. “Here.” Dean had a soft smile on his lips as he watched you drink your coffee and visablely relax and leant against his chest as he stood beside you. 

“Can you make the world stop spinning?”

“I would if I could, sweetheart.” Dean smiled. 

It was in the ways he cleaned your guns when you got back from a hunt whilst you patched up Sam, not trusting the long-haired-moose to do it properly. 

He said ‘I love you’ in the way he would let you hold his hand, make him sit down, and patch him up after you got back from a hunt and his mind had been elsewhere the entire time. It was in the ways he would cover you up late at night or how he’d walk you to bed and make sure you didn’t crash out in the hallway. 

Dean Winchester said ‘I love you’ in the way that he would tell you what was going on in his head when you asked, whether that be verbally or silently with just one look. It was in the way he would look at you when you told him something or gave him something he needed when even he didn’t know he was in need of it. 

You both knew each other like the back of your hand. And nothing would ever change that.

The fourth time Dean Winchester said the words ‘I love you’ was early one morning. You had been awake for about 20 minutes and he was going out on a quick store run. 

“You need anything?” Dean asked you. 

You looked around when suddenly, the two things you were looking for appeared in front of your face. 

“Thanks.”

Dean smiled and nodded. You wrote him a list of items you needed, adding sanitary pads as the bottom of the list. 

“Ooh, already?” Dean asked. He knew how painful your periods could get. There had been many times he’d washed your sheets whilst you got cleaned up in the bathroom. 

He was a hunter. He’d seen a lot worse than monthly blood spilled onto sheets. 

Those were the words he’d told you when you panicked and came back out of the bathroom and found him stripping your bed of your bloodied sheets. 

You hummed in response. 

“Okay.” Dean nodded. “You want me to pick you up some of that chocolate you like?”

“And potato chips!” You called out from where you had your head buried in your arms that lay folded on the table. 

Dean nodded. “And potato chips. Okay. I’ll be back in 40 minutes. I love you.” Dean quickly kissed the top, his hands gently squeezing the top of your arms. 

You mumbled back a response; “I love you, too.” but you were 30 seconds from falling asleep again.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Finally, the fifth time Dean Winchester told you he loved you...it was also the first. The first time he said those words in a way unlike any other he had before. It was the first time he said those three little words that had such a bigger impact than you throught they would have.

Everything seemed to change a few months ago. One day everything had been fine, normal, familiar. And then...it all changed. It was like everytime Dean wanted and went to say those three little words, he couldn’t. He’d say nothing and just hug you or oddly nod before leaving the room as quick as he could.

Usually it was the latter. 

You had thought over and over again about what could have happened, what could have been said but you couldn’t. 

You had been in pain. Both from cramps and from the fact you got thrown backwards at warp-speed into a barn door not more than a few hours before hand. 

“You okay? You need anything?” Dean asked as he walked into the library where he found you leaning against the table, your head down and eyes squeezed as tight as your hands were wrapped around the edge of the wooden table. 

You hummed tightly and shook your head. 

Dean waited a few moments, knowing the pain would pass just enough for you to be able to move. 

“Okay, come on. You got your hot water bottle?” 

You nodded. “In my room.”

“Then you go and get settled and I will make you some of that witch-tea that Rowena brought the last time she was here.”

You gave a small laugh. “It’s just ginger tea, Dean. It’s not a magical potion - although it does feel like it is sometimes.”

Dean nodded slightly. “Maybe so, but when it comes from her, I will always be a little skeptical.”

That night, Dean fell asleep beside you, you cuddled into him as you both sat and watched old reruns of Scooby-Doo. Dean seemed to remember everything that happened from the episodes, even if he hadn’t seen them in 20 years. 

That morning, Dean went missing and you eventually found him cleaning Baby in the garage towards midnight. He’d been out driving all day. 

But you were about to get the answers you had been waiting for. The answers to why Dean had been avoiding you and trying to keep you at arms length. 

It was late at night and Dean had been acting weird all day. It was like he wanted to be close to you but at the same time, run for the hills. And it was killing you. You just wanted to hold him. Hug him. Kiss him. Do something just to make him stand in the same room with you for more than 30 seconds. 

Sam had gone to bed a couple of hours ago and Cas was on a ‘weekend get-away’. Something you and Sam had booked for him a few months ago. He needed a break from Angel business and hunting business. The retreat was warded against most supernatural beings and just enough so that Angels couldn’t use their powers. Niether could demons. It was a place of relaxation for all supernatural beings. 

You were sat in the kitchen reading through some old case files that Garth had sent through. A couple of suspicious things had been happening two towns over. It might be nothing, but it was worth a look. You were finishing up on background research. 

Standing, you walked over towards the stove and began making a cup of tea when you felt a presence stood by the door. 

Dean.

“Hey, can-” Dean paused for a moment. “Can we talk?”

You wanted to yell yes. God, you’d love nothing more. 

“Sure.”

Slowly, Dean walked inside as if he was waiting for the floor to open up beneath him. Every step just...please don’t break beneath me, you are the only thing holding me in an upright position right now.

“What’s up?” You asked, walking back over to the table, only, Dean intercepted you. Dean stood in front of you and eventually leanted against the edge of the table. 

“Dean, I love that you want to talk to me but I thought this might involve actual words.” You said light-heartedly. “Dean? Hey, is everything-”

“I love you.” Dean blurted out, but the moment he did, his eyes went wide with panic. 

“That’s what you wanted to tell me?” You smiled. “I love you, too.”

“No. No, I mean- I love you.”

You furrowed your eyebrows and tilted your head. It was like he wanted it to sound different but it didn’t. 

“Dean? Wait. Hold on. You haven’t done something reckless have you?” You quickly placed down your hot cup of tea on the side and stood back in front of him with your hands on your hips. “Because I swear to god, if you have-”

“What? No. No. I haven’t done anything reckless. Or stupid. Or any other adjective you want to use. No. I just...God, I didn’t think this was the way it would go.”

“What would go?”

“Me...opening up...like this. What else am I supposed to say?”

You let a small laugh escape from your lips. “Say about what, Dean?”

“That I love you. That I’m in love with you. And not in a cool way, like, at all. I’m talking the ending of When Harry Met Sally; the whole you want the rest of your life to start right away speech.”

You didn’t know what to say. For one, he’d referenced a movie that he said he’d never watched - although you both had watched it together about two years ago and Dean knew most of the lines- for two, he was in love with you. 

“Son of a bitch.” Dean spoke under his breath as he looked to his hands. “I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. Let’s just- can we forget this ever happened? Yeah, let’s just do that-”

Dean went to stand up but with a firm hand you pushed him back down to sit against the edge of the table. 

“This is why you’ve been so weird the last couple of months?” You wasn’t really looking him in the eyes as you spoke, but once you finished, it was like Dean could feel your stear piercing his soul. 

“What?” Dean asked. “Wait. I tell you I’m in love with you and that’s your recation? You could seem less offended.”

“No. No. I’m not...I’m just...when?”

“When?”

You nodded. “When?”

Dean straightened up, his hands relaxed in his lap. “Four months ago.”

You stood back and folded your arms. “Four months?”

“You called me a nerd before you fell asleep and told me you wouldn’t have me any other way. But four months ago, I just realised that I was. I was long gone before that.”

You knew something about that. 

About a year ago, you had a freak out and you didn’t know why. Just woke up one day, Dean had cooked you breakfast and made your eggs exactly how you liked them - unlike Sam who, god love him for a tryer, just couldn’t get them right.

But, you being you, had taken it out on the case, freaking out of over the littlest things until Dean took you by the shoulders and made sure you were looking at him when he talked before he pulled you in for a hug. 

That was when you knew you were a gonner. 

He knew everything about you and it took you more than a decade to realise that you were completely in love with the legendary hunter, Dean freakin’ Winchester. 

“You’re in love with me.” You said it as a statement whe you began walking backwards until you were finally leaning against the silver kitchen island. “You’re in love with me?”

Dean knew you well enough to know that this wasn’t a rejection. This was pure confusion and fear. But, to be honest, he’d been weird with you the last couple of months and then, close to midnight, had confessed his undying love for you.

You looked across at him. “This isn’t some cruel joke, right? You’re still you? I know this place is warded within an inch of its cement but...”

Dean was now in front of you and reached behind you for a container of salt and the small jar of holy water. He poured them both over his hand and then pulled out his silver blade. 

It was him, alright.

“Look, you don’t have to say anything. You don’t even have to look at me but with how our lived have been in the last 20 years, I guessed I better say something sooner before we were hit with yet another life-threatening-world-altering threat.”

You nodded, rubbing your face before looking up to him. “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. I’m in love with you, too.”

“You don’t have to just say it to make this less awkward.”

“I’m not. I’m in love with you. You remember my freak out last year? That was when I realised-”

“Y/N, you don’t have to-”

But Dean was unable to finish the sentence because less than a second later, your lips were on his. You could feel his entire body go stiff until he realised what was happening. 

And after he did, it felt kinda...normal. Familiar, even. Like this was how it was always meant to be.

Just you and him. Together. Like this.

His hands came to both your face and your lower back pulling you in further to him as your hands went from his flannel shirt to his neck. 

You didn’t know when you both broke the kiss, but either way, you both stood still in each other’s arms, holding one another, heads lightly against one another. 

“I love you, Y/N. I’m in love with you.”

You smiled. “I’m in love you with, too, Dean Winchester.”

[sleepingdeath-light]

confessing to his long time crush during a sleepover hcs ; hunter

requested by ; anonymous (12/04/23)

fandom(s) ; the owl house

fandom masterlist(s) ; main | hunter only

character(s) ; hunter wittebane

outline ; “Hi! I know this request is a bit much but your writing style is awesome and idk if i could write it myself 😅 could you do a hunter (toh) x reader where they’ve been mutually pining for AGES but they don’t really know the other likes them but everyone else around them knows and is trying to get them together. so one day (maybe when they’re in the human realm, or not!! your choice! :)) the gang (luz, willow, amity, gus, hunter etc) are having a sleepover and they trick hunter and reader into sharing the same bed. SFW and fluffy please 😅😅 maybe a bonus of what the next day would be like if they woke up holding each other ?? AHH SORRY for the big request 😭😭 i hope u have a lovely day!!!”

warning(s) ; none, just fluff!

you’d known each other since he went by the ‘golden guard’ title — back when he was someone entirely different, but even then there was definitely something between you

faint and flickering and indistinct but nonetheless there

then when he went from guard to hunter your relationship evolved from that flickering something to a distinct attraction that you spent more time dancing around than doing much else

the two of you living embodiments of burning laughter-strained cheeks and stuttering smiling lips as you talked circles around your intentions and attractions with everything you had

thinly veiled disappointment at the term ‘friend’ and unshakeable grins at every crumb of physical contact being signs that the two of you missed — yet that blared your feelings clear as crystal to your companions

and, bless them, they tried to let the two of you work it out on your own but after two months of close contact in the human realm they snapped and decided to intervene

they excused the whole thing as a sleepover (coincidentally rescheduling for them all to be over at vee’s partner’s home and camila to be over visiting a friend of hers) — so by the time the two of you were set up in the noceda family’s living room you didn’t have the chance to back out

(and luz had stolen every other spare mattress and hidden them in her locked room, the menace)

initially it was awkward but then you broke the ice by making a joke about them abandoning you and things became easier

conversations were pleasant and easy, like a cool babbling brook on a hot summer’s day

affection was casual and brief, followed by the sort of laughter that only puppy-love can bring

you put on a documentary about wolves and just laid and sat side-by-side — with your head on his shoulder and his arm around your waist

it’s quiet and domestic and perfect but neither of you say anything

and you don’t say anything until well after you’ve fallen asleep in each other’s arms: your head in his chest and his body curled around you

peaceful and warm and domestic as you drift off to the sound of a soft british accent describing the dynamics of a wolf pack

you don’t know who woke up first, but you both end up pretending to sleep for a while in order to revel in the moment but all too soon you’re forced to end your little act when your friends come home

leaping apart dramatically with awkward smiles and averted eyes

laughing in fake coughs into your fists as you pretend not to have enjoyed the night as much as you had

almost getting away with it until luz, mouth working before her mind, asks if you two finally confessed last night

earning her a playful slap upside the head from amity whilst you and hunter stutter and stammer over your words — a thousand non-answers falling from your lips until you just stop, look at each other, smile awkwardly and nod

and his hand reaches out under the cover to shyly hold yours and your squeeze it in return, the two of you smiling like the teenagers you are at your non-confession

and, all of a sudden, the something that you spent so long pretending wasn’t there is suddenly very very clear in what it is

and you couldn’t be more thankful for luz’s big mouth

[myfictionaldreams]

⁀➷ The Teasing Game // Sandor Clegane x F!Reader

Summary:  There was nothing you loved more in life than teasing Sandor Clegane. What happens when he can’t take it anymore and he finally snaps?

Requested by: @vikingstoner69​ (thank you so much for the request!)

Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, teasing, size difference, jeaousy, mentions of masturbation, choking, biting, marking, rough oral sex (male receiving), rough sex, multple orgasms, dirty talk, hair pulling, threats of violence

Word: 4.2k

my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link 

edited: 25/6/25

There was nothing you loved more in life than teasing Sandor Clegane.

The two of you had known each other your entire lives, having been neighbours as babes, growing up together and then joining the King’s guard, you’d never been a day without seeing him. 

Much to your despair, your relationship had only ever been one of friendship, even though the two of you wanted one another, but with the guard duty, neither of you had made that extra step to give in to either of your wants and needs. 

However, this only made your game of mercilessly teasing him all the more fun, seeing just how far you could push his self-control before he finally snapped.

The game wasn’t about feelings or love; it was about unadulterated passion, lust, and the thought of his face between your thighs was enough to spur you on. 

It all started innocently, small lingering touches of his hands as you walked past, your face nuzzling into his neck whilst pretending to be drunk so that he could carry you to bed, or your foot nudging his under the table. 

This all, however, was too innocent for the Hound, the ignorance of his feelings for you, that he didn’t even notice that this was considered flirting and from what you heard through the paper-thin walls, the man enjoyed it rough and rugged.

Therefore, you changed your tactic, slipping your foot higher up his leg under the table, lightly brushing over his crotch. 

At first, he acted as if it was due to your alcohol consumption that you were becoming a little less restrained with your actions. 

Still, as he glanced across the table to you, he caught the smirk spread across your lips as you sipped your drink, all the while his hand lightly caressed your ankle, never actually removing it from his crotch, but again, that was all that occurred.

During training sessions, you started to wear less clothing, causing him to touch more of your skin and on the occasions where you bested him during your sparring, you’d make sure for him to land on his back with your legs wrapped around his head, his face level with your crotch, smirking down as he stared up at you, subtly adjusting his underwear, something that he seemed to be doing a lot recently.

He soon didn’t hide the effects that you caused to his body, particularly during a feast where your hands had been running up and down his leg, barely brushing over his cock when you stood, claiming to get another drink. 

Sandor was quick to follow, however, brushing up behind you, his clothed hard member poking into your spine as he leant down to whisper into your ear, “do you really want to play this fucking game with me, girl?”

Smiling cockily, you turned, staring up at him and answering, “what game Clegane, I don’t know what you are talking about?”

He wasn’t falling for your innocence, his arms boxing you into the table now behind you, his lips brushing against your ear, “want to know why I haven’t fallen for your little game? Because I know you wouldn’t be able to handle me, sweet bird. What will I say to the other guards when you don’t turn up for duty because you’re lying in the middle of my bed, unable to walk? Now, I’m going back to the table, and I expect you to keep your hands to yourself.” 

Not wasting another second, he turned on the spot, reclaiming his place at the table, leaving you to stand, staring with your mouth wide open at what had just happened.

Taking your seat back at the table, you did as you were asked, keeping your hands to yourself, but your mind had his words on repeat. 

How dare he think you couldn’t handle him? 

Just from your brief interactions with the member between his legs, you knew he was going to be big, particularly from the size of him in general, but the fact that he was stopping whatever it was between the two of you for solely that reason? 

It wasn’t fair.

It also only tipped you over the edge. 

That night, whilst you were laying in bed, with the thought of Sandor only on the other side of the thin wall, you placed your hand between your thighs, pleasuring yourself, shouting his name a fraction too loud, lost in your dirty thoughts until your cunt was pulsing in pleasure. 

By the way, he avoided your eyes the following day. You knew he had heard everything, but still, he made no advances, acting as if nothing had happened.

All these events led to today, you awoke feeling beyond frustrated, your hand doing nothing to ease the ache that flowed through your abdomen. 

It didn’t help matters that you had a sparring session with Sandor today and if your little game didn’t work today, you’d decided that you were just going to ask him to fuck you, not wanting to feel this ache anymore.

The sun beamed down on the two of you, drenched in sweat as the sound of your swords clashing echoed throughout the yard, others on the sidelines watching the two of you duel. 

Before long, you’d both been able to disarm each other, moving to hand-to-hand combat and even though he had a noticeable size difference, you were remarkably quicker, able to duck under his swinging arms to hit him with your blows. 

As he was distracted with a kick to the abdomen, you had a small run up and wrapped your legs around his head, trying to choke him. 

Still, his enormous hand was easily able to reach up and wrap around your slender neck, shoving you until you were slammed into the floor, his body hovering over yours, and instinctively, your legs locked around his waist.

The two of you stayed like that, just concentrating on catching your breaths until you felt something nudge against your thigh, a smile soon spreading across your cheeks, “Is that your sword in your pocket or are you just happy to see me, Sandor?”. 

He looked down at you for a second, grunting quietly as your legs squeezed him harder, causing his cock to rub against your thigh harder but as per usual, he stood, walking away leaving you led out in the courtyard, becoming almost feral with the deep desire that you craved.

That evening, you dressed in your usual slacks and shirt, wanting to drink with the other guards but not have them ogle you for the rest of the night. You made your way to the local tavern with Sandor, desperate for a drink or two. 

It was packed, much like it was every night, and the two of you sat in the corner, away from the majority of people, in comfortable silence, not even moving to tease him as the pure lust that had control over you was slowly becoming too much.

Standing from the table, you moved to the bar, ordering another round of drinks when another guard quietly approached, throwing his arm around your shoulders and whispering how much he wanted to fuck you. 

This happened often, as one of the few female guards, the men frequently became aggressive around you. Usually, you would punch them in their noses and return to drinking, but with how desperate you were to feel any sort of lust, you glanced over to the man. 

He was reasonably attractive, smelled a bit, but you didn’t have to look or smell him if you were face down on a bed whilst he had his way with you, so taking a gamble, you leaned up and whispered, “Then let’s go”.

Carrying the drinks back to the table, you tried to ignore the death glare that Sandor was giving the man behind you.

“Want me to get rid of him for you?” he grumbled, hand clenching on the table.

Trying to keep your courage, you shook your head, holding intense eye contact with Sandor as you said, “No, actually, I’m getting out of here. Some of us need a little bit of fun tonight. See you tomorrow”.

Not waiting for his response, you grabbed the stranger's hand and pulled him out of the tavern and towards your accommodations. 

You’d made it around the corner from your home before the man had pushed you against the stone wall of the castle, his lips sloppily moving over yours, hands fumbling their way over your chest, giving you no satisfaction, but at that moment, you were just happy to feel someone touching you.

His hand moved to the waistband of your slacks, your eyes closed, not caring who saw you, your heart pounding in anticipation of finally being touched, when the warmth he was providing was suddenly ripped from you. 

Snapping your eyes open, you saw the man flat on his back a few feet away, a large shadow stood between the two of you, “Sandor? What the fuck are you doing?” you gasped, watching as the giant picked the stranger up by his neck with ease, slamming him against the wall opposite.

“If you ever touch what’s mine again, I’ll rip you in half, do you hear me, boy?!” 

The man screamed ‘yes’ before Sandor released him, watching him scurry away before turning to you, his shoulders tense as his eyes burned with fury. 

He was standing before you in two large steps, causing you to jump back against the wall, adrenaline coursing through your veins at the scene you had just witnessed.

It was now your turn to have his hand wrapped around your throat, even though it wasn’t the first time that day this had happened, the meaning was completely different as you tried to keep up your confident facade by staring up at him, smirking. 

“Do you think all this teasing has been cute? Huh, girl?” 

Opening your mouth, you tried to respond, but his grip tightened slightly, only just cutting off your voice, but not enough to stop you from breathing. 

“Did you think I was going to let you walk out of the tavern with that cunt of a man? Did you think that I was going to let him touch what is, and always will be, mine?” 

You audibly gulped, squeezing your thighs together as your cunt pulsed in need, a small whimper pushing past your lips.

Sandor didn’t say another word, releasing your neck he quickly threw you over his shoulder, marching you down the rest of the road and before long, he was slamming open his door and pulling you off his shoulder, throwing you up against the wall, hand returning to your neck to hold you in place. 

He leaned down so his lips were hovering over yours, your heart seemed to stop at that moment as being so close to finally getting what you wanted but he paused, his breath warm against your face, smelling faintly of the cheap wine he had just consumed, “tell me that you’re mine”.

Your knees nearly buckled at the sensations that were rushing through you, mewling up at him as you held onto the wrist that was holding you up, “Sandor…”

His hand tightened slightly, his fingers nearly touching around the back of your neck as he repeated, “Tell me that you are mine.”

“I’m yours, Sandor, no one else's, only yours,” you finally managed to whisper. 

His chest bumped yours, it vibrating as he growled down at you, his face moving to your neck, his hands now pinning you to the wall as his teeth bite down into the soft skin between your neck and shoulder, causing you to cry out at the sharp pain. 

“Now everyone else will know that you are mine”. 

Goosebumps scattered across your skin at his words, your abdomen feeling warm at the thought of the guards seeing the indents of his teeth in your neck, the rumours that would circulate, the whispers that would come from such a sight… and you loved it, you’d wanted nothing more than this moment.

His hips thrusting against your stomach snapped you out of your thoughts, glancing down and seeing the taut material of his trousers looking as if they would split due to the strain of his girthy member. 

Without hesitation, you moved your hands up to get a feel for him, your eyes bulging slightly as your hand seemed never to meet the base, he had to be probably double the size of any man you had been with before and it only caused your mouth to salivate at the thought of him without the barrier of clothing between the two of you. 

“What do you want, little bird?” Sandor asked, his mouth still close to your ear.

“I want to be on my knees, Sandor, please let me taste you”, you pleaded, not caring about how desperate you sounded, wanting to see just how talented your tongue could be. 

His grip on your hips loosened as instantly you dropped to your knees, using the wall behind you to keep your balance as your shaking fingers undid his slacks, tugging them furiously down to mid-thigh, and you had to quickly duck your head not to be hit in the eye.  

“You truly are glorious, Clegane”.

Another word to describe him would be impressive, not sure why you were so surprised with his size, as you stared at his cock, unblinking, both hands moving to grip him, the member throbbing as soon as contact was made. 

Your fingertips couldn't touch around his girth, and you knew immediately that his entire length would fit down your throat, but that didn’t stop you from sitting up taller, tongue licking around his already-leaking tip. 

The giant man growled with pleasure, one hand leaning against the wall and the other moving to wrap into your hair, holding it steadily, watching down at you as your mouth opened as far as it could go, and his tip slowly disappeared.

Using your tongue on the underside of his cock you felt his abdomen tighten at the sensations that you were creating for him, using both of your hands to squeeze up and down the length that wasn’t in your mouth, staring up at him with large eyes, taking in every gasp and twitch that his body made. 

You spent the next few minutes seeing how much of him you could take, not even half of his length before you were retreating to suck in air.

Before long, you were bobbing your head, saliva filling your mouth at the salty taste of him. 

Sandor was grunting with each suck and flick of the wrist and was starting to lose control, his hips thrusting of their own accord, the hand in your hair tightening until it was painful, pulling and pushing your head to try and take more of him until you were doing any actions, he was entirely in control, using you as he desired.

His cock started to become harder in your mouth and if it was any signs for the noises that he was making, he was close and the thought of swallowing his load had you sucking harder, jaw starting to ache but not caring, needing this more than anything else.

A sharp pain flared across your skull however as Sandor pulled you off his cock, his breathing coming in heavy bursts as he looked down at you, mouth gaping open, “fuck, that mouth of yours… Stand up, I need to finish in your cunt”.

You didn't budge, however, only smirking up at him as you brashly smacked his hands away, seductively saying, “or, you could do both”, and instantly reattaching your lips to cock, bobbing up and down quickly whilst simultaneously using your hands to pleasure him, cupping his balls, massaging them and feeling them harder, along with his shaft and finally, his hot seed was spurting out, coating your throat and tongue.

Sandor’s knees wobbled as he watched you drink every drop of his salty cum, moaning at the taste and the way that you were able to have this giant man, quivering at your touch.

As he caught his breath, you simple stared up at him, trying to ignore your juices that were leaking through your slacks, pulling Sandor’s cock free from your mouth, expecting it to soften slightly after cuming much like every other man that you had been with but instead, it stayed rock hard, still throbbing and ready to go.

All of a sudden, his rough hands were on your arms, heaving you to your feet and shoving you back against the wall and finally, his lips were against yours. 

The kiss was hot, passionate, a mixture of lips, tongue, teeth nipping and tugging, hands trying to reach every part of each other's bodies and no matter how close you both were, it didn’t feel enough. 

Sandor growled once more, stepping back slightly to give him room to grip onto your shirt and easily be able to tear it in two, swiftly followed by repeating this action on your trousers and undergarments, leaving you completely bare before him.

 He stared down at you, specifically the way your nipples had pebbled and were aching to be touched. 

“Are you finally going to touch me Sandor or am I going to have to do it myself?” you smiled cockily up at him, seeing the shift in his appearance from taking in every inch of your body to hunger and lust as he gripped onto your neck, easily able to throw you onto bed causing to do squeal at the sudden movement.

As you repositioned on the bed, Sandor pulled his clothes off, giving you a moment to openly stare at his body, admiring his sheer size and build. 

The bed shifted as he climbed, leaning down as if to kiss you, but his mouth moved south, encircling around one of your nipples, pleasure rippling over your chest as his other hand greedily tugged and twisted at the other breast. 

Staring down at him, you lay on the bed, loving the feeling of his body covering yours and the way his teeth started to nip on the delicate buds on your chest gently.

“Fuck, that feels so good Sandor” you moaned, hands twisting in his hair, holding him in place but he was wanted to taste more of you, just like you had as his lips moved further down your body but you couldn’t wait, you needed to feel him. 

Reaching to grip on to his chin, you forced his head up to look at you, “I’ve been waiting too long for this Sandor, I need your cock inside of me, now”.

Not waiting for his reply, you took control of the situation by turning over, shoving him off for a second and laying so your arse was in the air, head lying on his pillows that overwhelmingly smelt of his musky scent. 

Sandor sat back looking at the way you presented yourself to him, and from this angle, he was able to see just how affected you were by the situation, your pussy was pulsing, and shining with juices that had seeped over your thighs whilst withering around on the bed.

Licking his lips he kneeled behind you, looking down at you, gripping the base of his cock, but instead of sliding it into your awaiting cunt, he moved it up and down your folds, brushing over your swollen clit causing you to jolt from the pleasure.

You moaned at the sensations, gripping onto the sheets as you tried to move your hips back, needing to feel more of him, but you sensed his reluctance as he grabbed your hips to keep you still. 

“I meant what I said before, I don’t think you can handle me, little bird.”

You nearly cried out in desperation, coming so close, yet he still cared about not hurting you, even after all the sparring sessions you’d both endured. Looking over your shoulder, you started pleading, “I can take everything you have to give me Sandor, I’ve wanted this for so long please, just fuck me”. 

He didn’t look convinced as he looked you up and down.

The sheer size of his chest was overwhelming as he loomed over you, but you continued, “Remember, I am yours, I can take this, Sandor, please!” 

This seemed to snap him out of whatever trance he was stuck in as you felt pressure at your entrance so you closed your eyes, laying your head back on his pillows and relaxing every muscle in your body as he eased his tip into your cunt. 

It was fine at first, glad that you had been able to have all of these months of horny daydreams to try and stretch yourself out in case this was ever to occur but as the thickest part of his head breached your entrance.

You couldn't help but gasp at the burn from the stretch, the pain taking over for a split second before pleasure coursed through you at an unimaginable rate as he pushed in further. 

It was only as he still, half inserted and hitting your cervix, did you realise that you’d already orgasmed, feeling so overwhelmed with the years of build-up that just one thrust was enough to have you pulsing around him.

Sandor was growling as you squeezed his cock, “you’re so fucking tight” he grunted, holding still as he waited for your cunt to stop involuntary clenching as you came down from your high. 

Releasing the deep breath that you didn’t realise that you had been holding, you shifted backwards, hinting for him to continue, and now that he’d stretched you out thoroughly, he didn’t hold back with his actions.

Pulling back slowly, he thrust his cock harshly back into you causing you to cry out at the blast of pleasure. His movements now were quick and hard, his grip on your hips almost bruising, but the only thing keeping you from shooting up into the headboard. 

Soon enough, he released one of his hands and started to slap your arse, watching the way you mewled at the pain and euphoria that he was creating, silently wishing he had done this a long time ago. “Fuck, you feel better than I ever could have imagined Sandor” you praised, only causing him to thrust quicker, the bed creaking with his movements.

Reaching your hand behind your back, you tried to dig your nails into his hip, but he had other ideas. He gripped onto your wrist while finding your other one, bringing them both together behind your back, so you were now leaning on your neck. 

You could feel the steady tightening of your abdomen, your cunt and thighs starting to tingle as you screamed louder.

Sandor could feel you getting closer to your second orgasm, so leaned over you and gripped your hair, pulling on it harshly once more whilst tugging on your wrists until you were upright, leaning on your knees as he continued to pound into you, trusting that his grip on you was firm as that was the only thing not stopping you from falling forward onto your face. 

The new angle also pushed his cock harder against the beautiful spot within your core and after two powerful thrusts, you came hard, knees shaking, body twitching as wave after wave of pleasure erupted throughout your body.

His arm now moved around your body, helping to keep you up as he started to kiss along the bite mark on your neck, easing the two of you down until you were both lying down, your back against his chest whilst his cock still stood tall within your hole. 

The arm around your middle moved to grip your throat, keeping you still as you lifted your thigh, keeping it up as he started to pull out, before fucking back into you, his hips slapping against yours.

Sandor fucked you hard, his chest vibrating with the grunts that he was producing, his and your sweats mixing as he used your body as you’d always dreamed that he would. 

The grip around your throat tightened momentarily before releasing altogether, his thrusts becoming more frantic and sloppy and you knew he was close, as his hand dropped down your front until his rough fingertips started to rub back of forth on your aching clit.

The noise you made was near animalistic, eyes rolling back as he expertly hit all the right spots, growling in your ear, “cum for me, that’s it little bird, milk my cock”. 

Your third orgasm was just as powerful as the other two, body nearly convulsing as your breath caught in your throat, cunt clenching almost impossibly tight around his thick member, enough so that he too shouted out, hips stilling as you felt his liquid shooting out in small bursts, filling you up and spilling out of the sides of his cock.

Gently, he helped to ease himself out of you, his seed spilling onto the sheets before, but neither of you cared, moving onto your backs and just staring at the ceiling, euphoria still very much present and pulsing through you both. 

It was you who was the first to look over at him, smiling up giddily as you said, “We should do this again sometime, Sandor.”

[queenshelby]

The Spy (Part Two)

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Warning: Smut; Infidelity

Words: 4,389

Two Weeks Later…

Hiding in the corner of the room, you couldn’t help but giggle when, finally, he caught you.

“Found you Y/N” Charlie said with great excitement and you encouraged him to find Ruby next.

Ruby was the master of playing hide and seek and, for all you knew, she could be hiding anywhere. In a cabinet, beneath one of the many beds or even in the lavatory.  

You knew you needed to help Charlie find her and when you both scooted through the hallway and ran past Tommy, a smile formed across his face.

“Looking for your sister, eh?” Tommy asked and Charlie nodded.

“Do you know where she is, dad?” Charlie asked but Tommy had no idea.

“Sorry Charles but I do not know where your sister is hiding” he confirmed and you both went on looking until, within seconds, you ran into Lizzie.

Unlike Tommy, Lizzie wasn’t amused by your games and quickly took upon herself to put you into your place. She did so often and belittled you every chance she got. You despised her but, yet, you knew that this was something she felt she had to do as she considered you to be a threat to her marriage.

“Don’t you have anything else to do Y/N?” Lizzie asked before continuing on. “I believe Frances requires help with the washing and the furniture have been awfully dusty lately” she then pointed out.

“Yes Mrs Shelby, I will get to that in a bit” you told her and you wished that Tommy had told her about your purpose at the house rather than make you pretend that you were a maid. Then again, you knew that she was on his list of suspects when it came to the betrayal and this didn’t surprise you. Their marriage was loveless and in shambles. You knew that Lizzie despised her husband but, yet, she wanted to keep him and be looked after.

“I want you to get to it now Y/N. Make yourself useful for once” Lizzie spat in response and Charlie immediately got upset.

“But Lizzie, she is playing with us. Please let her. Dad said it’s okay” Charlie told his stepmother.

“Your father is too lenient with the maids and there is a reason for that” Lizzie said with an irritated voice and, whilst Charlie looked at Lizzie somewhat confused, you couldn’t help but giggle.

It was only recently that you saw Tommy with one of the maids in his office and Lizzie was clearly aware of his indiscretions with that said maid.

“I will need to do some work Charlie. You go and find your sister alright?” you eventually said before making your way downstairs to the laundry room.

When you arrived at the laundry room, you noticed a new maid. Her name was Anabelle and she replaced the maid that Lizzie had fired earlier that day which was something you weren’t surprised by.

That maid had slept with her husband and, if he were married to you, would have done much worse to that woman than just fire her.

But Lizzie was different. She wasn’t a criminal at heart and she most certainly wasn’t strong willed. Tommy dictated what she had to do and when.

She mostly obeyed Tommy’s orders but she also took matters into her own hands if and when they affected her relationship with him. They fought a lot and neither of them were happy with each other. Yet, they stayed in this relationship for various reasons.

You had overheard her talking to Arthur Shelby’s ex-wife Linda once or twice before and realised that she wasn’t with Tommy for love.

Tommy married her after she fell pregnant with Ruby because he was a member of parliament. He had to be seen to be doing the right thing and she saw an opportunity.

Tommy provided financial stability and wealth which, clearly, was something she cared about. She said that she chose this life, it didn’t choose her. But would she bite the hand who is feeding her? You weren’t so sure but gave her the benefit of the doubt for now while you were working on other leads to Tommy’s problem.

One thing was clear however. Lizzie was no match for Tommy. He was bored with her as he needed an equal. Someone more ruthless. Someone fearless. Somone who was like him.

With those thoughts running through your head, you helped Annabelle to fold the sheets which was a tedious task and, when Tommy came to find you, you were rather grateful.

He’s given you a task and, when Lizzie found out that he interfered with her instructions, she was somewhat upset. It was obvious to you that she didn’t like you and, perhaps, she felt threatened by you now more than ever.

Then, when she realised that the somewhat secret task Tommy had given you involved you travelling to London on your own for three days, she was pleased and so were you. You couldn’t stand her presence much longer while, at the same time, you were intrigued and attracted to her husband which you knew would become a problem sooner rather than later.

You saw something in him she didn’t see. He was kind but yet ruthless. He was fearless but also caring. He valued loyalty and yet he demanded that you betray your family.

He was a gangster and so were you. You always had been and it almost got you killed. Just like him, having been close to death changed you and no one quite understood these changes. It was difficult for people to comprehend who you were but, somehow, you felt as though Tommy understood you.

Whilst you worked for him for two weeks, you also spent a lot of time with him, in his office, talking, playing cards and drinking whiskey.

He was good company and he was handsome. His blue eyes often mesmerised you and he slowly began to trust you, asking you for advice on certain business matters.

You knew how to launder money and you knew how to avoid tax. You had done it for a long time for your father’s company and your insights were helpful for Tommy.

But, you also had a task to carry out for him and, whenever you were getting closer to the end goal, Tommy pulled the trigger on the operation. He was cautious and with every day you spent together, his caution grew. Why, you didn’t know, but you would soon find out.

Four Days Later…

It was around midnight as you walked through the door of Tommy’s office. You had just arrived back from London, a day later than expected and peeled off your jacket and kicked off your expensive shoes.

‘Everything alright Love?’ Tommy chuckled, listening to you sigh with frustration.

‘The person who invented high heels should be sent to jail. It’s a crime’ you said somewhat irritated before handing Tommy a stack of papers which related to your father’s new business.

‘You know I don’t care about what you wear around here’ Tommy said as he took the papers from your hands.

‘You don’t, but my uncle in London does. He pays a high emphasis on appearances and I had dinner with him tonight, hence my late return’ you said before pouring yourself a glass of whiskey from Tommy’s decanter.

‘Why the fuck didn’t you tell me, eh?’ Tommy asked, sounding worried.

‘Because you would have talked me out of it’ you said to him.

‘Your uncle is a dangerous man. At least I would have sent backup’ Tommy explained.

‘That would have been too obvious, Tommy. He would have noticed. Despite, what do you care? You are paying me to spy on my father for you and find out who betrayed you and that is what I am doing’ you pointed out to him while undoing your hair and getting a little more comfortable with your attire.

‘I am but you are no use to me if you are dead, eh? So, next time, fill me in, alright?’ Tommy said before telling you that, what you got from your uncle, was good and, indeed, rather helpful.

‘Alright, alight…’ you huffed. ‘So, how is Mrs Shelby tonight?’ you asked eventually after snatching a cigarette from Tommy’s silver packet and asking him for lighter while he looked through the papers.

‘She is well, I guess’ Tommy chuckled while lighting your cigarette.

‘She fired Nancy before I left, so she might fire me too. She already threatened me twice Tommy. Doesn’t that concern you?’ you asked, knowing that you had been spending a lot of time in Tommy’s office before you went away and, of course, she didn’t know that you were simply discussing business with him.

‘She fired Nancy for a reason Love, so don’t worry about that, eh’ Tommy said while lightening himself a cigarette as well.

‘Yes, because you fucked her’ you laughed.

‘Excuse me?’ Tommy said sternly but also somewhat surprised.

‘I am a spy, Tommy. That’s what I do. I spy on people and I watched you fuck her two nights ago. It was quite a sight’ you pointed out and Tommy couldn’t help but gasp.

‘Did you enjoy it?’ he asked with a smirk across his face.

‘Did I enjoy watching you fuck Nancy?’ you confirmed with a laugh.

‘Yes. Did you enjoy watching me fuck one of the maids?’ he asked again bluntly.

‘I did actually’ you said while leaning across his large oak desk, giving him a good view of your décolleté while smiling at him.

His chin dropped and he chuckled once more but, before he could say anything else, you spoke again.

‘It’s late. I need to get some sleep. Goodnight, Tommy’ you winked at him before brushing your hand over his and leaving it at that.

‘Sleep well Love’ he said as he watched you leave his office.

A Day Later…

The following day, you helped Frances and Annabelle with the cleaning of the house after you had yet another fall-out with Lizzie.

That morning, she questioned you about your purpose and her suspicions about you grew.

But Tommy kept telling you to ignore her and you did so the best you could.

That evening Tommy also asked you to come to his office again which worsened the situation especially since Lizzie had been keeping an eye on you.

You had to be careful not to get caught, which was a task that had become increasingly difficult. After all, Tommy and you spent a lot of time together even though your relationship was platonic and related largely to business.

‘Good evening, Mr Shelby. How may I be of assistance?’ you said as you eventually managed to sneak into Tommy’s office but saw Frances in his office also, serving him some whiskey from the new batch that had just arrived at Arrow House.

‘Come in and shut the door behind you’ Tommy instructed before dismissing Frances.

‘That would be all Frances, thank you’ he said and she responded with a quiet ‘yes sir’ and left just as you stepped inside.

‘So, what’s up?’ you asked curiously after Frances left.

‘I’ve got the guns you wanted’ Tommy then said before placing two small pistols on the desk for you along with a leg strap, holster and ammunition.

‘Very compact’ you said as you began to cock them both while assessing their suitability.

‘Just as you requested Love. Nice and small with a harness and a leather strap’ Tommy said and you nodded with a smile before lifting up your skirt and placing the leg strap around your thigh.

You placed the gun into the leg strap all the while Tommy was watching you with wide open eyes.

‘Works fine’ you acknowledged when you realised that the small weapon would hide away nicely beneath your skirt before winking at Tommy.

Of course, you knew that he had been watching you. In fact, he had been watching you for the past two weeks and since you were as abrupt as he was, you didn’t lose any time and asked him a question that had been on your mind for a while.

‘Say, Tommy…would you like to fuck me too? Like you fucked Nancy?’ you asked bluntly and Tommy almost immediately choked on his whiskey.

He had never a heard a woman speak like this before and he most certainly didn’t expect you to be so direct.

‘Tommy?’ you asked as you did not get an answer from him and, eventually, he chuckled.

‘I am serious Tommy. Would you like to fuck me?’ you asked, catching Tommy by surprise. ‘I’ve seen the way you’ve been looking at me for weeks, so there is no need to be shy about it now’ you then pointed out and Tommy stood up, almost nervously.

‘Yes Love, I would like to fuck you, alright?’ he then said with a deep but yet reluctant voice while looking straight at you.

‘Okay then…’ you responded with while reaching beneath your skirt, removing your newly acquired gun from your leg, along with your panties.

You placed both items onto Tommy desk and looked into his eyes.

‘Then take me Thomas. Fuck me like I am one of your whores, right over this desk’ you said with eagerness in your voice while steadying yourself against the desk.

‘You are serious?’ Tommy asked with surprise and you confirmed that this was, in fact, what you wanted as you reached down between your legs and began to rub your soaking wet pussy.

A guttural moan tore from your throat and you ground your hand against your pussy while Tommy watched you.

He was speechless and it wasn’t until you leaned forward and brought two of your wet fingers to his soft lips that he finally moved and spoke up.

Tommy grabbed your wrist and licked your juices of your fingers.

‘Do you like the way I taste Tommy?’ you asked as he devoured your fingers.

‘I do and you are very wet, aren’t you?’ Tommy said before taking off his gun holster and pulling you in for your first ever kiss. But it wasn’t a romantic kiss. It was a forceful kiss in which both of your tongues fought for dominance.

The kiss ignited a fire inside your pussy, an uncontrollable burning that left you thighs wet and, for the first time in your life, truly needy for someone else.

You staggered against the back of Tommy’s desk while the fire inside of you both was building to a feverous pitch.

You both needed release and you were quick to climb onto his large cedar desk and spread your legs widely for him.

‘I want you to taste me again Tommy’ you said and, with a smirk on his face, he pushed your legs apart further and kneeled.

His hot mouth immediately made contact with your already aching pussy and you let your head fall back and moaned.

‘Right there, Tommy. Don’t be gentle’ you said and Tommy began to suck on your clit with a good amount of force before biting over it gently.

‘You taste so fucking sweet Love’ Tommy groaned and hearing his husky voice made you moan even more.

After a little while, he pushed your lips apart with two of his fingers and then pushed them into you with force, causing you to gasp.

‘Oh god yes, make me cum with your fingers. This feels fucking amazing’ you shouted out as he curled them up a little and made contact with your g-spot.

‘You are fucking soaking’ Tommy groaned in between flicks of his tongue and thrusting into you with his fingers and it didn’t take long for you to reach your high.

He was skilled and reached places no one else had reached before. It was difficult for you to hold back and, after a minute or two, you no longer could.

‘Oh god yes Tommy’ you moaned as your legs began to tremble and your orgasm washed over, causing your fluids to leak from you like a fountain.

‘You made a big fucking mess of my desk Love’ Tommy said after you pushed his head away from your throbbing pussy and you couldn’t help but laugh at his comment.

‘And I am not even sorry’ you smirked as you jumped down from his desk and Tommy immediately spun you away from him.

You gasped as his arm snaked around your neck and pulled you back against him.

‘I can’t wait to sink my cock into this tight pussy of yours’ he groaned into your ear and you felt his erect cock press against you.

The deep resonating tones of his voice crashing through your mind was like fuel on the inferno between your legs.

‘I cannot wait either Tommy. My pussy has been aching for you’ you confirmed before leaning forward over his large desk and, just after you did, he lifted up your skirt.

‘Hmm you are so fucking wet, dripping all over the floor’ Tommy then said after quickly running his fingers through your slit and you moaned and pushed back against his fingers.

‘I need your cock, Tommy. Right fucking now’ you demanded but Tommy wasn’t ready just yet.

‘Patience Love’ he said before giving you quick slap on each of your cheeks, causing you to gasp.

‘I swear Thomas Shelby, unless you stick it in me right now, all hell will break loose’ you said again before another guttural moan escaped you as you fought against Tommy’s tight hold.

Tommy chuckled and the noise made your knees weak. His free hand slid over your thighs and between your legs. You almost screamed with delight as the heel of his hand pressed down on you hard, desperate clit.

‘Need…you…inside’ you began to moan through a broken sentence but he silenced you again.

‘Shh! We don’t want my wife to walk in on us, do we?’ Tommy asked and you responded with a quick chuckle.

‘Then stop teasing me and fuck me already’ you demanded impatiently.  

Just as you responded, you could hear Tommy unzipping his pants and you knew that he was freeing his member.

‘Spread your legs for me Love’ he then said and the flat of his hand moved slightly as his thick cock pressed against your wet entrance until, suddenly, and without warning, he thrusted his length inside of you.

‘So fucking tight. You feel incredible’ Tommy groaned as your pussy offered up some resistance. You were tight but so incredibly wet. Even he moaned when he realised how desperate for this you were for this.

‘Oh god you are stretching me so much Tommy’ you moaned and, then, Tommy’s foot pushed yours to the side and spread your legs further.

‘I want you to fuck me hard and fast. Take me like I am your whore’ you moaned and Tommy pulled your head back so he could kiss you again.

‘You like it rough, eh?’ Tommy asked as he thrusted deeper and deeper into you, repeatedly, filling you up.

‘Oh god yes Tommy. I want you to have your way with me and fill me up. Claim me. Make me yours’ you moaned as your juices tried futilely to push him out through the sheer quantity you were producing in you.

‘Fuck, I can’t wait to fill that tight pussy of yours with my cum Love. Is that what you want? My cum inside of you?’ Tommy groaned as, eventually, he pulled out and you gushed for what seemed like hours before he thrust back inside you.

‘Yes, that’s what I want. I want your cum deep inside my pussy’ you gasped as your breasts were squashed against the desk as Tommy took you from behind.

‘Tommy’ you moaned again and, just as you were going to say something else, you lost your thought as two of Tommy’s fingers pushed somewhere you never thought to feel pleasure from.

‘Shh, quiet Love’ Tommy ordered as you screamed when he filled both of your holes at the same time.

You were experiencing both, pleasure and shock. This was a new sensation but, eventually, you relaxed and let him in, giving over completely to feelings he forced your body to experience with his cock in your pussy and his fingers inside your ass.

‘Do you like this Love? My fingers in your ass?’ Tommy asked in between thrusts.

‘I do. I feel so fucking full’ you confirmed as your scream died on your lips and was replaced by a deep, guttural moan of delight and contentedness.

You were fuller than you had ever been and your virgin ass was being shown to feel things you had only heard in whispered conversations between some of the women you knew.

‘Maybe next time I get to fuck this ass of yours with my cock, what do you think?’ Tommy groaned as he thrust in hard again.

‘Yes Tommy. Harder. Fuck me harder. I want my pussy to hurt’ you barely managed to moan as Tommy made you feel things you had never thought you would experience.

As Tommy’s force and speed increased, another orgasm tore through you. You couldn’t hold back this time and screamed Tommy’s name so loudly that he had to cover your mouth with one of his hands.  

You pushed back against him, trying to take more, wanting to stretch yourself on his cock.

‘That’s it, take my cock deep into this tight little cunt’ Tommy groaned as he removed the fingers from your ass and brought his hand up to your throat.

His hand quickly tightened around your throat and you felt your world start to spin and your pussy clenched as you prepared to cum again.

Just as you felt like you were going to pass out through lack of oxygen his hand loosened and your orgasm hit you, hard and fast.

You moaned and screamed again and, by this point, you were getting sore and you wanted him to cum too.

With a devilish grin, you decided to do everything you could to make him cum.

‘I want your cum deep inside of me Tommy. Give me all of it. I need it’ you told him as you put your hands on the desk and lifted yourself up slightly. Then, you began to thrust back against him, taking him by surprise and he moaned loudly.

‘Fuck, that’s it, keep pushing back on my cock Love’ Tommy groaned and that is what you kept doing.

You wanted to feel the hot fluid inside you and him filling you with his cum. You wanted to feel him pull out and know that his cum was dripping out of your well used pussy and you told him, over and over again.

‘Keep that up and you will get your wish Love. I am close’ he then announced and you moaned in delight and thrust yourself back against him again. He moaned again and slapped your ass playfully as you fucked yourself against his cock.

‘I am going to cum deep inside you’ he groaned and you smiled and thrust back again, delighted in how you were affecting him.

‘Fill me up Tommy. I want it…I want all of it. I want your seed to drip out from sore and used pussy when you are done’ you moaned as you looked back over your shoulder, then bit your bottom lip suggestively.

‘Trust me Love, there will be enough for your pussy to leak for days’ Tommy groaned and grabbed your hips with both hands and started pumping faster and faster.

Slamming through orgasm after orgasm, you gave up taking notice, you had hit the point where you were cumming constantly.

Then without warning you thrust back one more time and he collapsed over your back and you felt it. The spray against your walls, the moan against your back and then the kisses up your spine as he pumped in and out of you, slowly now, releasing everything he had inside of you.

He started to pull out, but you clenched his softening shaft with muscles you didn't even know you had.

‘Wait’ you said breathlessly and stated slowly moving backwards and forwards on him, using his cum to lube up his penetration. Then you started moving faster, you weren’t done and, even if he was then you would use him. You wanted to cum one more time. He had shown you the abyss and now you were going to stay a while.

To your delight, however, Tommy grew hard again within less than two minutes and, as soon as he did, you pushed him away from you.

‘My turn to have my way with you now’ you announced as, with one hard push, you pushed him into one of the arm chairs.

‘Fucking Hell Love’ Tommy gasped with surprise as you climbed on top of him and immediately sank down on his hard cock.

His cum and your juices spilled out of you as his hard rod pushed back inside and you began to ride him, hard and fast, taking what you need from him while silencing his moans with your lips.

Orgasm after orgasm washed over you and, eventually, Tommy filled you with more of his seed as you made him cum once more.

‘Are you satisfied yet Love?’ Tommy grinned and you could feel how sore you were down there.

‘For now’ you winked as you lifted yourself of him slowly.

When his cock left your sore pussy, a large amount of his cum began to spill from you and directly on to the soft leather of the arm chair.

There was, indeed, a lot of his seed inside of you and he wanted to see your cum dripping pussy and made you bend forward once more to take a look.

Using both of his hands, he spread your hole apart and watched his cum flow out and down your thighs. Then, he collected some with his fingers and brought it up to your mouth, making you taste it.

‘Hmm, so sweet’ you moaned in approval as his cum tasted sweet and thick and, just before you were done cleaning off Tommy’s fingers, the door to his office opened abruptly.

Within a split second, Tommy pulled up his pants and you covered your most intimate parts with the fabric of your clothes. There was no hiding what you were doing and your eyes widened when you saw who barged inside.

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[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 5

Episode 20: Massage Chair

So far, this was how (y/n)'s day had gone:

Seven AM. She woke up to Ray's wandering hands and incredibly touchy mood, only to glance at her silent alarm clock and realise that last night's plan to sleep in had gone out of the window. He was awake, and so was the sky, the bees, the birds, the early risers, the late workers, and if they were up, it meant she was too. 

Eight AM. One energetic start later, she showered, brushed her teeth, combed her hair, and threw on a pair of jeans and a jumper, ready for the day much sooner than the exhausted heroine last night would've hoped for - at least she'd crammed in seven hours. 

Eight-thirty. Time for breakfast. A quick shuffle around the kitchen - auto-snacker food was great, but it gained a metallic, plastic taste after one too many meals - and she returned to the main room with a steaming cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal. Simple but effective; plus, it was nice to sit with her doofus and discuss what they would do that day as if they were a real married couple. The peace was lovely while the coffee lasted.  

Nine AM. The kids arrived. Henry, Charlotte and Jasper piled into the Man Cave simultaneously as Schwoz made his first appearance for the day, shattering the tranquillity of the happy couple cuddled up on the couch. It was all noise, smiles and raucous laughter from then on, stemming from the boys teasing their boss over how he spoon-fed his sweet girl to ensure she ate plenty. He blushed, she squeaked, and they found it hilarious - another typical morning. 

Nine-forty-five. Ah, yes--the spring clean in the middle of May--the third of the year. She dusted the shelves, wiped the table, and attempted to sort through some of Ray's infinite crap, which he said was essential, but everyone knew it was utter crap. After vacuuming the kitchen, the main room, endless corridors, their bedroom and a few guest rooms, she sanitised the auto-snacker, wiped every button on the supercomputer with a cotton bud to remove the built-up finger grease and mopped the tiles to sparkling perfection. 

Eleven AM. Finally, she slumped on the couch, content with how clean and fresh her surroundings were. Ever the neat freak, she admired her work, which would inevitably become dirty when the kids returned from their ice cream run, Ray's workout finished, or Schwoz started another dusty repair job. 

But, for now, she was free to be beside godliness and explore various online boutiques to book an appointment - wedding dress shopping, that is. Nothing seemed to catch her eye; some were too sparkly, some weren't sparkly enough; others were too long, too puffy like a pastry, too short, too old, too young. But she guessed that was what an appointment was for - there was a dress out there somewhere, and she and Charlotte were on a mission to find it.

Eleven-thirty. A call came in, and (y/n)'s brief sit-down with a cup of tea and the Goddess of Love Bridal Boutique was over. Everyone assembled in the Man Cave, scuffing her beautifully clean floor as Charlotte reported some tiny freak was attacking a furniture store. Oh, well. The cleanliness was pleasant whilst it lasted. So, the heroes rushed off as they always did, eager to save the day as the tea was left to go cold, and the helpers were left to do nothing. Lucky them. 

That was before things got really busy, and it wasn't even midday. 

"Oh, look who's back! We didn't even see you with all this really hard work we've been doing!" Schwoz grinned at Henry as the exhausted boy returned from the mission and stepped out of the tube. Curiously, neither Ray nor (y/n) was with him, and his skin seemed redder than usual; one spot, in particular, looked very sore and...in the shape of a tiny palm print?

"So, how'd the mission go?" As she walked over from the computer, Charlotte asked her friend where she and Jasper pretended to work. Ray hated slackers, and they feared that if he returned to them mooching about, there'd be hell to pay. It was easier to lie, even if the glittery pillow on the floor said otherwise. 

"Yeah! Did you guys capture Slappy Pete?" Jasper also asked, walking with the girl. 

"Yeah, we got him, but he slapped me pretty good. Is there a mark?" the sidekick hissed as he turned his face so they could see where the irritatingly quick criminal had managed to hit him. Oh, yeah, there was a mark - six fingers and a palm slowly emerging on his cheek as the skin flamed and throbbed. 

"Ehhh..."

"A little..."

"So red!" At least they broke it to him gently. 

"Tiny-handed freak," Henry growled, cursing the day Slappy Pete decided to become a villain since it would be super fun going home tonight to explain to his parents why he had yet another bruise blossoming. Seriously, they were starting to get suspicious about all the rough-and-tumble fights he said he had--boys couldn't be boys that much in one week. 

"I didn't know Slappy Pete has six fingers," Jasper noted as he analysed the mark and strangely counted one digit too many, thinking his eyes were playing tricks on him. 

"He was holding a tiny, little hot dog when he slapped me...tiny-handed, hot dog-eatin' freak!" His friend snarled, more to himself than anyone else since it was his poor reaction time that had allowed the miniature man to slap him one last time before they bundled him into the Man Van. And speaking of "they"...

"Where are Ray and (y/n)?" Charlotte questioned, partly wanting to move another before her friend angered himself into a coronary but mostly wanting to know where the happy couple were. Usually, they all came down together unless they needed "time alone". 

"Oh, they're going to be here in a couple of seconds with a little surprise," Henry replied mysteriously and did an odd little celebratory moonwalk as they cheered. They didn't get surprises often, especially not from the boss. 

"Is it backpacks?! Please tell me it's backpacks!" Jasper cried as he speculated what Ray and (y/n) could have for them; weirdly, all he'd wanted in life was backpacks. Hundreds and hundreds of packs for his back. Henry and Charlotte just hoped this wasn't another bucket situation. 

"What? No, dude. What's your deal with backpacks?"

"Name a better invention. I'll wait!" Jasper scoffed at the teen's puzzled face and folded his arms as he paused for an answer. In his mind, whoever thought of creating a sack for carrying things that went on your back was genius...but not the best invention in everyone else's. 

"Uh, the wheel," Henry replied, naming one of the oldest and most crucial development in human history, which made his best friend stop and think again. 

"Name two. I'll wait."

"The toilet," Henry went on, catching Jasper out again with one of those things that don't seem that important but are vital. Stuck and red-faced, the boy tried to go again, believing in the supremacy of the backpack, but he never got a chance to finish after Charlotte grew tired of his silly argument. 

"Name three. I'll w--"

"What's the surprise?!" she said over him, staring at Henry with wide eyes so he would continue before she tore her hair out. 

"All right, let's just say it's something you can sit in," he told her, smirking since he thought he was being all cryptic with his slight hint, but it was huge. How many things can someone sit in? So, it wasn't hard to guess. 

"Is it a chair?"

"I was also going to guess, chair," Charlotte and Schwoz responded, killing Henry's enthusiasm with their wit. Well, that was disappointing, and his smirk fell; now, he had no choice but to admit that Ray and (y/n) claimed a chair for themselves after the mission, but it wasn't as dull as it sounded. 

"'Kay, it's a chair. That was an obvious clue. Pete slapped me so hard..." he groaned and raised a hand to tenderly stroke his cheek. He might have given him a goddamn concussion, but he didn't have time to think about it when the elevator door opened, revealing a very giggly (y/n) pulling away from a blushing Ray.

"...Who wants to guess what we have under this sheet?" the hero announced after clearing his throat. They'd been kissing and flirting and all that gross stuff on the ride down, and he'd not expected the doors to open so suddenly, thus meaning the kids and Schwoz caught him being all soft and tender. Funny. 

"Chair."

"Is it a backpack?" Thankfully, however, they spared his blushes and didn't say anything as they swiftly straightened themselves and moved on. Charlotte and Schwoz went with their correct guess, but weirdly, Jasper refused to give up on the hope they were all getting new backpacks, even after Henry said they weren't. 

"Whoever said backpack was wrong," (y/n) said as she helped Ray wheel the shrouded object - chair - out of the elevator. He'd insisted that he could manage himself; after all, what kind of gentleman would he be if he left the heavy lifting to a pretty lady like her? But, as ever, the woman insisted, pointing out that she was stronger than she looked, something she'd proved time and time again. 

"I already told 'em it was a chair," Henry told her, glancing at the woman and noticing she sported her usual strawberry lipgloss - the shiny one that tasted delicious. It wasn't a remarkable observation, just a passing note that he should've disregarded since it wasn't exciting or funny...until he saw that Ray had an awful lot smeared on his lips too. Now, that was funny. 

"Well, then, whoever said backpack is an idiot," the man repeated his sweet girl's words but with his little joke, glossy lips smacking together with each syllable sounded. Who was he kidding? He was addicted to the taste of honey-coated strawberries and chased it at every opportunity - wore it with pride whenever he could, "Because it's a chair!"

Ray removed the silver sheet from the large lump to reveal possibly the fanciest, most beautiful chair ever created. Gorgeously soft leather smoothed across carbon fibre armrests and back to sculpt a sitting experience like no other, coloured gold, black and cream, so every inch of the lucky person sat in it had the time of their life. Only one chair in the universe looked so good, and they all knew its name. 

"That's a Royal Relaxer Massage Chair," Jasper breathed out as Charlotte and Schwoz gasped beside him. They stepped forward as Henry took a seat, marvelling at the most incredible massage chair in the world, wondering how the trio managed to get one and thinking that they do or give anything to have a go in it. 

"Hold onto your brains.." the boy said as (y/n) passed him the remote control, and he activated the chair. It began glowing and thrumming, sending a thrill through the helpers' bodies as he smirked at their reactions, "'cause I'm about to blow your minds!"

Looking down at the fancy touchscreen remote, Henry slid the volume button from the bottom to the top, causing a loud, rock-n-roll song to start blasting from the speakers. It was precisely Ray's idea of a hit tune, and he danced goofily in time to the beat to both show-off and make his precious girl laugh as the kid moved forward. Oh yeah, the chair could move. 

"How did you guys even get this thing?" Charlotte asked, amazed by the luxury and technological spectacle as the chair turned around. The rock riff ended, meaning Ray stopped dancing and returned to holding (y/n)'s hand as they crowded around. 

"Ah, well, when we finally caught up with Pete, he was slappin' up a bunch of people at that fancy Ukrainian massage chair store," Henry replied, exhilarated to retell the tale and experience the heavenly massage. His muscles needed it after the hellish morning he'd had--as if (y/n)'s wasn't any busier. 

"Chair-nobyl?" Schwoz suggested, causing the heroes to nod. 

"That's the one," (y/n) confirmed, remembering how plush and soft the carpet felt under her boots in there and how she thought that the expensive wallpaper would be enough to pay for her wedding dress at least. "The owner was so happy we stopped him that he was like, you can have any chair in the store. And we were like, how about that one?"

"And he was like, uh, no, any chair but that one!" Ray giggled as he cosied up to his fiancée, adopting a silly Russian accent as he imitated the flustered storeowner after they asked for the best stock he had for free. 

"And we were like, shut up, dude. You said we could have any! And he was like--"

"Oh, no, why did I say any?!" the hero went on, interrupting Henry since he deemed his funny voice to be better than the kid saying it in a boring way. It had felt a little mean at the time, but the deception was worth it for that chair. After all, the man made a promise. 

"Then, we took it!" (y/n) finished simply with a broad smile as her doofus released her hand in favour of wrapping an arm around her shoulders. He looked at her happy face and pressed a kiss to her temple, eliciting more giggles as he reflected on their cunning actions. 

"We did, we did... We took that stupid old man's chair! He was so tiny!"

"Wait, wait, wait!" Charlotte shouted over her boss and Henry as they began to banter over (y/n)'s head. The woman contently rested against his chest as they laughed about the doddery shopkeeper until the girl pointed out something highly significant - something (y/n), in her tired state, failed to notice five minutes earlier. "Did you two walk through Junk-N-Stuff dressed as Captain Man and Miss Danger?"

"Pfff, no..." Ray scoffed, thinking she was insane since neither he nor his pretty girl would ever be that dumb or careless. They were so damn careful about where they went as their heroic personas, but when he glanced down to laugh about it with her, he and (y/n) noticed that gone were her jeans and jumper, and in their place was her signature red satin skirt and matching bodice. Oops.

"Shit, yes, we did. Come on, doofus!" (y/n), suddenly not half-asleep, nudged Ray quickly and bolted out of his arms, attempting to drag him before anyone upstairs could ring the press, their friends, family and half of Swellview to report who they'd seen. 

Captain Man and his beloved fiancée did not frequent poky little stores filled with junk and stuff, so one sighting would have god knows who sniffing around, which could only lead to bad things. 

"Ah, if you'll excuse my incredibly hot girl and me, we need to go erase some memories upstairs. Schwoz? A little help?" Ray sheepishly said as he allowed (y/n) to tug him, but not before looking over his shoulder at the genius behind him. He invented the tech, so it made sense for him to help, although everyone knew the real reason. Schwoz would do the dirty work after the fun stuff was over, leaving the boss more time to fawn over his future wife. 

"Can I do the wiping this time?" Schwoz enthusiastically asked as he grabbed the memory wiper, the teens crowded around the high-tech chair, and the couple waited for the elevator. They were already all over each other--well, Ray was; (y/n) reciprocated, but she was understandably concerned about the morbid possibilities brewing upstairs. 

"Uh, maybe when you're older," the hero replied absentmindedly. Whilst his precious girl found the small man's childlike energy cute, he wasn't so fond of it, mainly because the wiping was his favourite part. Seeing someone forget everything was strangely fascinating, especially when they started doing stupid things. 

"Awww," Schwoz pouted and looked down at his feet before coming up with another idea, "can I help drag the body outside?"

"Sure thing, Schwozie," (y/n) nodded as the elevator dinged and opened. She pinched his smiling cheeks as you would with a boy, and he squealed with happiness at the thought of helping out those in charge. 

"You're too nice to him, darlin'", Ray muttered as he pressed the button for Junk-N-Stuff and glanced at his handyman, who, after receiving such thrilling news, couldn't stand still. The heroine looked up at her lover with a warm smile and shrugged, knowing he wouldn't be complaining when the two minutes of alone time gave him ample opportunity to put his hands on her butt without judgement. 

"I know, but you wouldn't love me if I weren't this sweet," she replied teasingly, fully aware that he fell for her unending kindness before anything else - which he'd told her many times before. It wasn't a serious comment, but when talking about his undying love for her, Ray took it very seriously because it was his favourite thing to tell people. 

"Oh, I think I would. I love a million other things about you. Your pretty eyes, the way your shampoo makes your hair smell gorgeous, your favourite lip gloss, how hot you are when you're fighting, how hot you are when you're not fighting, how smart you are, your sweet lil' a--" he listed, ticking everything off in his head as he raked his adoring eyes down her body. (y/n) blushed under his intense scrutiny and gushing words, heart fluttering as his smile turned mischievous, only for Schwoz to draw the line there. 

"Okay, Ray, we get it! Jinkies, you'd think she was the only girl in the world," Schwoz clamoured, having heard enough about his friend without needing to go further south. He didn't need to know about that. And whilst he thought it was cute, the man's gushing was a little excessive - enough to give the genius tooth rot from how sugary it felt, but then again, in some ways, Schwoz's words were correct. 

"She's the only girl in the world for me," Ray muttered to himself, and no one heard him over the scuffle of the elevator grinding to a halt and dinging. His companions exited first, oblivious to the sentiment he'd mumbled, but it didn't matter. Only he needed to know that there'd never be anyone else for him since he was adamant that he would be in love for life. 

"Dude, you gotta believe me!" They heard from the backroom as they tiptoed out of the elevator. Schwoz hung back, nervous about being seen since he didn't have the luxury of a mask like the heroes, but they mimed for him not to panic. The teenage dirtbag type next door didn't seem like the intelligent type. 

"I just saw Captain Man and Miss Danger! Nah, nah, they weren't fightin' crime. They were, like, rolling this big chair through this door, and, dude, the Cap couldn't keep his hands off her butt!" The teen said in his annoyingly chilled-out voice, crooning to his bro about the heroes he'd witnessed out of the blue. The rumours were true; Captain Man was a dweeb for his girl, but bro, M-D was so fire. 

"I think it was like--"

"Tap, tap!" Ray said confidently as he nudged the boy's shoulder. He'd heard his comments about his infatuation with one of his sweet girl's finest features, and whilst it was true - he never could keep his hands to himself - it wasn't an observation he wanted making by a punk like him. 

"One sec, dude. Someone wants to talk to me," the dumb boy laughed as he turned around, his long, poncho-style jacket fanning out as he did. He had a peculiar look that made (y/n) raise an eyebrow as she handed the primed and ready-to-go memory wiper to her lover, who was more than ready to turn his brain into a noodle--or whatever was in there. 

"Duuuuuude," the teenager groaned as he slowly turned around, phone lowered to his hip, and saw the real-life Captain Man and his lady friend standing there. His friends would never believe what he saw; they'd probably put it down to some hallucination, given that they no doubt smoked their minds to mush every night, but finally, he'd be able to tell them that the best boobs in Swellview went to Miss Danger with no competition. 

"I think you're forgetting something," (y/n) told him softly as he stared into the disked plunger of the device, watching with a sad expression when Ray squeezed the trigger. Before he could react, a relentless attack of green waves engulfed the kid's face, addled his brain, making everything so very hazy. It was never pleasant to see someone forget every person and thing in their lives, but they had no options. Oh well, they'd make sure he went to a good home. Somewhere. 

"Yeah, like my girl's ass," Ray grumbled as the boy gave one final spaced-out grin before collapsing, exhausted by the process. As he fell, his phone clattered on the floor, and as everything returned to silence, the couple realised that whoever he'd been chatting with hadn't hung up. 

Taking a quick look to see if the coast was clear, Ray snuck to the teen's side, eager to grab the phone and convince the moron on the other end everything was okay. That way, no one would come looking for the bum on his shop floor. 

"What are you going to say?!" his sweet girl mouthed to him as she flipped the door sign to say closed - for privacy they sorely needed in those outfits. Distressed by the idea of someone recognising his voice, she gestured for him to end the call, given that everyone knew the commanding tones of the city's best crimefighter, but as she got close to his side, Ray soothed all her worries and cleared his throat. He knew exactly what he was doing. 

"Whoa, dude! I was totally wrong! It wasn't Captain Man or his incredibly hot fiancée, Miss Danger, just another really handsome dude. But, my guy, the girl was smokin' too. You should've seen her! Later, brah!" he exclaimed in his douchiest accent, imitating the kid to a tee. 

His words brought a blush to (y/n)'s face and a chuckle from her lips as he signed off the call without a hitch, and when he cleared his throat again to bring back the baritone she loved, she kissed his cheek and jaw adoringly. To some, he was an idiot, but to her, he was a doofus. 

"He's all yours, Schwoz," Ray told the genius hiding behind the counter. He'd snuck in behind them, something they noticed since they were trained superheroes, and even though the idea of dragging a body away was repulsive to them, he still retained his enthusiasm - licking his lips and everything. 

"Nice plan, handsome, but shouldn't we help out?" (y/n) asked as she observed the little man get to work. Even though it was a teenager's body, it was still an immense amount of weight for such a tiny guy to shift, so her sweet side begged to help. However, when his arm curled around her waist and began to pull her away, it decided it preferred his attention instead. Schwoz would be fine.

"Nah... I am gonna scroll through this guy's photos with my smokin' hot girl," the hero replied smugly and guided her towards the ratty, old couch that had sat in Junk-N-Stuff for more years than they cared to remember. It was a bit gross, stained, musty-smelling and dogeared, but neither cared as Ray plonked on the sponge, the stolen phone in one hand and his girl's wrist in the other so he could pull her into his lap. 

(y/n) copied his movements, albeit with more grace than him, and wiggled around until she found the comfiest position, leaning her back into his chest and going floppy when she did. Ray released a groan he didn't know he'd held until she stopped moving her hips, and before his beloved fiancée could blink, the cell and plenty of embarrassing photos were in her face - the only distraction that could take his mind off other things right now. 

"My god, this guy is such a loser," he breathed out as he scrolled through the kid's photos from top to bottom. His earliest ones were bland and uninteresting, just some screenshots and saved images, but further down, the pictures he'd taken were much more enjoyable. They told him that the boy went everywhere on a skateboard, hated it when his dad told him to clean the garage, had a pet goldfish called Emo, and his friends hung out at the local park to drink cheap whisky, and he wanted to be a college drop-out. Go figure. 

"Hey, look," (y/n) murmured as her lover kept scrolling, only for him to stop when she pointed at one particular point in time, "he has a girlfriend. He can't be that much of a loser."

Looking at where she pointed, the hero realised his sweet girl was right. Suddenly, the feed included a similarly grungy-looking girl with a thick, dark fringe, thick, dark eyeliner, and dark, foreboding clothes. To look at her, you'd think the happiness and joy, plus any pastel colours, had been sucked out of her, but in the photos, she looked happy. They looked happy - together.

"Mine's better..." Ray gloated quietly, a smug expression on his features as she gave him a playful glare. Of course, she was trying to be serious, but, as always, it was a mini competition for him—who had the hottest girl—and Ray knew his was the most alluring, kindest, sweetest girl around, hands down. And he mentioned it whenever, wherever, with whoever, but (y/n) didn't need to hear it, so she teased him.

"Oh, yeah? Your girlfriend? I didn't know you had one of those! You'll have to introduce us some time," she giggled, their noses bumping as he leaned into her body and chuckled. She'd pick up on any misguided phrase, not that Ray minded since her teasing always brought kisses and snuggles. He laughed into the brief kiss they shared - a mere peck - as they forgot about the phone and the depressing reality that the kid would forget about his life, family and friends, preferring to focus on each other instead. 

"Well, I don't have a girlfriend anymore, per se," the man replied in a funny voice, acting as though there was some big secret between them or as if they were both foolish, "I've got something even better."

"I love you so much, Ray," (y/n) whispered after kissing his forehead and resting her head on his chest. She didn't see the need to drag out the teasing anymore and felt too shy to hear any more praises; her heart might explode. So, she pressed against him even further, seeking the warmth that always helped her drift off for a nap, which she needed. Dear god, she needed a rest. 

"I love you too, sweet girl. Always have, always will," he replied softly, feeling the peace of the moment wash over him as her breath fanned over his chest in a warm, continuous cycle. He'd hold her there for however long she needed, be the perfect pillow to sleep against, and be the best protector whilst she rested because he meant it. He'd loved her forever, and as he returned to scrolling through the phenol for a laugh, nothing could be more explicit - he was the luckiest guy in the world when an angel decided to love a loser like him. 

~The next day~

Perhaps it wasn't the best idea to spend an entire afternoon dozing, lazily making out and snacking. After all, when the cats are away, the mice will play. Or fight. And argue. Mostly fight and argue. 

It turns out that the fancy chair sneakily gained by the heroes was not only the best but the most coveted amongst the kids, and as such, they all wanted a turn. However, like most chairs, only one person could sit on it at one time - unless you were convinced otherwise, like Ray and (y/n).

Henry wanted a turn; he was the hardworking sidekick, so why not? Charlotte also wanted a go; she had all the brilliant ideas, so why not? Jasper wouldn't mind either; he...had enthusiasm, so why not? 

They all had reasons, they all had an argument, and they all had weapons, so, of course, an all-out war erupted between the teens, culminating in the following afternoon when Ray sat down to read a fascinating audiobook he'd downloaded from the PearStore. So, with his sweet girl dozing in his lap - the exhaustion was still absolute after an early-morning call again - he would thoroughly enjoy it. If only...

"Get away from that chair!" Charlotte hissed as Jasper stepped toward the prize they were squabbling over. The Royal Relaxer Massage Chair had been left overnight in the main room since that was the only neutral ground in the hideout, but unfortunately, it was also the most crowded, which meant whenever someone shouted, (y/n) murmured and jerked in her sleep, which in turn bothered her doofus as he was concerned about her rest and listening to his book. 

"No!--Owww!" Jasper replied definitely, earning himself a laser to the left arm from his friend. That's right; Charlotte wasn't one for weapons, but nothing's fair in love and war. No one said anything about dirty tactics. 

"It's not your turn!"

"It's not yours, either!"

"I'm sitting in that massage chair, Jasper!" the teens argued back and forth, growing so loud that their voices even bled through Ray's headphones, interrupting the guy talking about being a firm but the fair leader in the workplace. If it was lousy for him, he didn't dare imagine how his sweet girl must've been feeling. He could feel the soft vibrations of her frustrated whimpers every few seconds, and slowly, he was starting to get pissed off. 

"Go ahead, see what happens!"

"Are you threatening me?!" Charlotte asked incredulously as she stared down the point of Jasper's laser controller and him with hers. Neither wanted a standoff, not between friends, but the other had to be bluffing. They wouldn't do some severe harm over a chair, would they?

"I am trying to!"

"Well, you know what? It's not working!" They bickered, again drawing Ray's focus from his audiobook and adorable fiancée to whatever they couldn't agree on. His eyebrow perked, and it flashed in his mind to step in and tell them to knock it off, but then, the elevator dinged and out stepped Henry. Finally, someone with a calm, balanced mind. 

"All right, all right. Move out of my way. I got a massage coming!" he announced as he strolled into the room, only to face a barricade formed by the newly allianced Jasper and Charlotte. They didn't want to lose out on the chair, but he was an enemy, too, so it was mutually beneficial to take him down first. 

"You're five minutes late," Charlotte stated innocently, in the kind of voice the annoying kid uses in class to snitch on people. 

"Which means you missed your turn," Jasper added on, not caring about how much trouble his friend could get in should their bosses hear about his tardiness. Of course, Ray and (y/n) were aware, even in their relaxed states, but one odd comment could be the nudge for them to scold him for unprofessionalism. 

"Okay...I understand...but there's something you guys should both know..." Henry said fragmentedly, trying to seem calm and soothing before he reached into his pockets and double-crossed his best friends, "I've got two zappers!" 

"Uh-oh! Papa's home for dinner! That's right. I'm crazy! I'll do it!" he grinned at them manically as they struggled to pin him down with a single laser each. Jasper and Charlotte dithered between aiming at him or the other, but Henry was borderline psychotic with the power he wielded over them. The arguing got so bad that (y/n), still clinging to the prospect of sleep, even though she'd been awake for the past ten minutes, thumped her hand against Ray's pec in protest. 

Couldn't they do this somewhere else? They hadn't helped an old lady out of a sewer at five AM--she had. Plus, she hadn't slept properly in days. She should get the damn chair. 

"You know what? I'm the one who fought Slappy Pete, so I should be able to use the chair whenever I want," Henry proclaimed, thinking it was only fair. 

Finally realising that this problem wasn't going to go away so simply, Ray pulled down his headphones to hone in on their argument as (y/n) cracked open her heavy eyelids and raised her head. It was criminal to do so; her lover had the world's comfiest lap and chest for dozing. 

"Well, I'm the one who figured out that Slappy Pete was even heading--" Charlotte fired back, thinking it was only fair. That was until Jasper stuck his nose in and ruined it. 

"Beh, beh, beh, beh, beh!" he mocked, silencing her words since, to him, it was all just white noise. "Ray told me to shut up right before the emergency call came in, and I did. So, if I hadn't, you wouldn't have even heard the call, so..."

"That doesn't even make any sense!"

"So I should get the chair!" He bellowed above Henry's scoffing and stupid comments, thinking it was only fair. If he never did all that, the chair would have never entered their possession, so he held the most prestige. Either way, the couple sitting behind the group had grown tired of the endless yelling and empty fights, knowing they couldn't ignore them indefinitely. 

"We should intervene," (y/n) muttered against Ray's shirt, her lips brushing against the skin poking above his collar. 

It was the right thing to do, even if the thought of leaving his warm, firm embrace with those tree trunks gently curled around her waist and the occasional falling kiss landing on her forehead. Ray wasn't too happy either, not when he'd just gotten to the good part of the book and entered a state of absolute bliss with his dream girl perched on his knee, looking so peaceful and content. 

But he listened and didn't argue when she stood up and stepped away wearily, taking his frustration out only on the teenagers who caused it. 

"Okay, okay, everybody, shut up!" he roared above the petty squabbling and kicked at the rota fashioned by Charlotte for turn-taking and quickly ignored by Jasper. The clattering of the sheet metal flying off the table was enough for the trio to button it and look guilty at their boss, who was visibly seething at their inconsiderate behaviour. 

"Now, we've been listening to you guys argue for the past ten seconds, and we're sick of it!" the man snapped harshly, sending them into apologetic excuses about how it was everyone else's fault and not theirs. Their eyes flickered up to (y/n)'s, dreading seeing her disappointed face since it was so much worse than her angry one, but she didn't wear either. Instead, she seemed mildly irritated and more teacher-like than anything - what a relief, maybe. 

"Now, normally, I would teach you all a lesson by lighting that chair on fire and forcing you all to watch it burn," Ray told them, causing the kids to grow pale and beg for him not to. Anything but that; they were desperate and, as such, turned to (y/n) in their hour of need since she held power to reason with the furious man. 

"No, don't!"

"Burn me instead!"

"Maybe give them your second idea, handsome," the woman said and turned to her lover with hooded eyes, and the teens sighed from her mercy. She could never be that cruel; plus, it wasn't a good idea to torch a massage chair she wanted to use, no matter how much her heart told her their soulmate would always be comfier. 

"But I'm halfway through the first chapter of this audiobook, so I'm going to do what it says," Ray quickly changed his tune and flashed his screen at them so they could see the brilliant blue cover of his latest read - one of those jargon-packed, ridiculously chirpy self-help books printed by dull people filled with bullshit and chaos. 

"How To Be A Boss Boss? (y/n/n), you're seriously letting him read this?" Charlotte squinted at the man's Pearphone to read the title before her questioning eyes flickered to her friend. It sounded like pure drivel, and god knows that Ray didn't need more of that in his head. 

"Well, I believe all life coaches are charlatans who only see idiots with credit cards. However, if my Ray-Ray wants to read a book, he can. Plus, he's hot when he's being authoritative," the woman replied, her eyelashes fluttering at her softening doofus as Charlotte's did the same - but only because she was rolling her eyes. 

Ray didn't know if it was the poor sleep schedule talking or her unimaginable love for him, but he felt his heart explode at the adorable nickname, deeming it new but immediately treasured as a heat simmered in his belly at the second part. If she liked him acting the boss, he'd give them the biggest ticking-off in the world  - although mean bosses don't usually bend over backwards for their future wives. 

"Precious girl..." he smiled and pulled her into a brief side hug, shattering the façade of him being a strict and severe leader as he melted like butter under her warm affection. Suddenly, Henry, Charlotte and Jasper wondered why they'd ever been afraid because if they needed to soothe his temper, they had to stick his sweet girl in front of his eyes. 

But they moved too late, and all too quickly, Ray steeled himself and donned the "boss boss" mask again, despite everyone knowing that wasn't the real him. 

"Schwoz!" He bellowed, splitting the teen's eardrums since he only had one pair. Well, it was nice that he didn't deafen someone with his sudden personality change, which was so fast it could've given them whiplash. 

"Uh, real quick, big dog," Henry jumped in, unsure if it was wise to start asking questions as he summoned his live-in minion, but he felt compelled to anyway, "I don't know if you heard, but I'm the one who fought Slappy Pete, so uh--"

"Yeah, well, we fought him too, so we should get--and they're not listening," (y/n) began to argue back, thinking that they hadn't factored her and her doofus into the equation when it was the fair thing to do. However, the kids merely fell into a fight again, bickering over who did, said or helped what, which forced Ray to storm over to the computer and get drastic. 

"Sounds like it's chair-burnin' time!" he growled, pulling them away from their insignificant grievances when he held a blowtorch aloft in his hands. The flame was lit and burning hotly, ready to start smoking their beloved massage chair, and they didn't want that to happen. 

"How To Be A Boss Boss says I shouldn't let you guys fight over a chair..." the hero continued as he relented and returned the blowtorch to its place as a subtle warning by the computer. 

Then, he sat on the chair, curling his arms to enlarge his biceps and spreading his thighs to thicken them deliciously. What (y/n) wouldn't give to take a seat there too, but simultaneously, she was enjoying the majestic view he made. "It says I should make you fight over a chair."

"That doesn't make sense,"

"It really says that?"

"Doofus, should I confiscate this book?" Henry, Charlotte and (y/n) pondered as they silently debated whether that was an actual rule and a good idea. Unquestionably, that point was self-destructive and not a boss move, yet whether it made sense or not, Jasper was ready to lay his soul bare if it meant a taste of heaven. 

"I will fight the world for this chair." A strong statement to make, and it had his friends looking at him strangely because it made him appear desperate and played right into Ray's hands, so thank god for Schwoz. 

"You called for me, boss?" The small man dutifully asked as he appeared from behind the secret door, wiping his hands with a rag to remove any grease from an interrupted repair. 

"Yeah...get the death snake," Ray instructed him ominously, his eyes flickering to his sweet girl so he could rake his eyes down her body in an equally hungry manner, but no one else noticed. They found themselves too busy with the sudden fear of a "death snake" hitting them since it sounded so vicious and deadly. 

"Why should I get the death snake?" Schwoz questioned indignantly, immediately noting the danger and high risk of death if he was to head into the storage room and start playing with the dangerous reptiles there. 

"Because I'm the boss boss, and I say say so so!" However, Ray begged to differ. Stupid Schwoz was undermining his authority because usually, what he said went. And his pretty girl couldn't quiver at the knees and look at him with those doe eyes if the disobedient genius made him out to be an idiot, who no one respected. 

"No, but you're indestructible! I'm--"

"Do as I say! You want me to say it louder? Do as I say!" Ray growled, even as Schwoz made an excellent point. He was soft and squishy, practically a pincushion for any serpent who wanted to sink its fangs into something, but that didn't affect Ray. Why couldn't he do it, so everyone avoided an excruciating death?

"No, no, no!"

"It's not going to bite you! It's not even poisonous--" ironically, they were now the ones bickering, with the teens and (y/n) watching on in boredom as the boss tried to salvage his control - badly. 

"That's not strictly true, Ray," the heroine butted in after hearing her doofus say something that wasn't strictly true. That damn snake could kill someone, especially someone of Schwoz's size; why did he think she never went near the thing? Super-regeneration, be damned; she wouldn't take any chances. 

"Okay, it's very poisonous! I don't know why I said that!"

"Yes, it is! You go!" Schwoz told him, switching their roles of employer and employee until he began nudging Ray closer and closer toward the secret door, but the man held his ground. He still had some dignity and power to cling to, and he wasn't about to be bullied by someone half his height. 

"I'm not gonna go!" he snapped.

"(y/n), a little help?" Schwoz smirked as he tilted his head to the oblivious woman - his secret weapon. She looked at them blankly, wondering why he wanted to drag her into their spat, but it was all elementary. Unlike the kids, Schwoz would exploit Ray's greatest weakness without worry because it would mean he'd survive to live another day, so after a quick gesture, (y/n) sighed and relented.

"Ugh, fine," she muttered and stepped away from the bemused kids, all holding back laughs from how their great leader's resolve broke when her eyes met his. So much for being the boss boss. 

"Doofus, I need you to go and get the death snake."

"But sweet girl--"

"Ah! No buts! Now, be a good boy and run along..." she told him firmly, feeling a feeling of satisfaction pool in her tummy when his protests dried up on his tongue because there was no way he could refuse. He sought her approval and pride like the air his lungs sought to breathe, and no matter how small and meaningless the task, he wore her pleasure like a badge in the shape of her heart pinned to his chest. 

"Okay, baby," he nodded, practically a puddle when she beamed and planted a kiss on his cheek as a first reward. The next would be when he returned with the dangerous creature, and since he could already guess what it was - something he never refused - he hurried to go and retrieve it, but not before taking one final swipe at his repairman. 

"Ya big baby! I'll go get the death snake!" he snapped, wanting Schwoz to feel like a coward since he couldn't handle one itty-bitty snake. But in reality, it was difficult to hide how he virtually skipped out of the room, footsteps lighter from knowing how he was completing a task not given to him by Schwoz, that smug bastard, but by his fiancée. 

The sweetest girl in the world and the real boss of the Man Cave because what she said went. 

~

"And the home of the...Cave," the group sang together formally, hands placed over their hearts in a respectful gesture appropriate when harmonising the Man Cave's anthem. The teens had barely ever heard it, Schwoz and (y/n) barely knew the lyrics, and it all seemed a bit too extra for a dull Saturday afternoon. But Ray insisted, deeming the occasion solemn enough for them to gather around poignantly - he even wiped a tear from his eye. 

"So, why'd we just sing the Man Cave National Manthem?" Jasper asked, causing (y/n)'s face to twitch ever so slightly when she heard the wordplay. God, she hated when her doofus did that; not everything needed to have "man" attached to everything. 

"Because this is the opening to The Ray Games," Ray announced proudly, spreading his arms wide as his darling girl glanced up at him from his side with a bemused eyebrow raised from the lame name, "A series of physical and mental challenges. And the winner of the Ray Games...gets the massage chair."

"Yes!"

"I got this!"

"I'm nervous, but that chair will heal me!" the teens cried in anticipation. Challenges were their kind of thing; Charlotte was clever, Henry was fit, and Jasper was daring, so together, there stood a chance for some hefty competition. However, they hadn't heard the challenges yet and (y/n) guessed they wouldn't like them. 

"Great! Round one--put the hat on the death snake!" the hero announced, and suddenly, the trio weren't so chirpy as Schwoz pulled a silky cloth from a glass box. Inside the box was a slimy, hissing snake with patterned scales and a forked tongue, behind which laid fangs that could kill a man, woman or child with one bite. And he wanted them to put a tiny hat on it? Was he insane?

"What?!"

"No way!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, dude. That's crazy!" Henry exclaimed and looked at his boss as his friends freaked out--and rightly so. They weren't ready to die yet, and certainly not by such a crap death. 

"Yeah, nobody's putting a hat on a death snake! Tell him, (y/n/n)!" Charlotte argued, too, turning to the woman who'd gone slightly pale at the serpent's appearance and subsequently clutched at her lover's arm. She was never good with snakes and, agreeing with the girl, went to tell Ray that they could prove their devotion some other way before someone got hurt, but oh no. 

The hero adored his sweet girl, but that trick wouldn't work again.

"Doo--"

"Hmmm, guess you guys don't want that chair, huh?" Ray smiled sourly at the two as his arm curled around (y/n)'s waist and brought her close to his chest - so close that her face smushed between his pecs, silencing any protest on her lips. Her breath warmed the cotton of his shirt as Henry and Charlotte began to tell him that he was insane, crazy, nuts for thinking they wanted death, and despite how good his cologne smelt, (y/n) was inclined to agree with them. 

"No, doofus, I think they think you're crazy for thinking they want certain death," she said, voice muffled from talking into his chest, but they still heard her. And, of course, had the kids said that, the hero would've flipped his lid, but since it was his precious girl, he took it as flirtatious banter. 

"Oh, I'm crazy, sweet girl? Did you say I'm crazy? Well, then..." Ray smirked coyly, making her eyebrows furrow at what he could be planning since his words suggested mischief, but his slow movements said otherwise. However, his true intentions were exposed rapidly when his hands flew forward to her ribs and began tickling up at down, causing the woman to shriek and wriggle against his touch. 

Henry and Charlotte shared a knowing smirk as they watched their stern "boss boss" become childlike and cheerful, and (y/n) bend over to try and save herself. It was no good, though; Ray's fingers were clumsy but precise, finding her most sensitive spots with knowledge etched onto his brain since he brushed against them during their first movie night. 

"Nooo, Ray! Please, please, stop! Oh, god, it tickles!--" she screeched, although that was the whole point. He loved her reaction, thinking the way she screwed up her nose was nothing short of adorable, and he pressed his fingertips further, planting kisses against her sensitive neck to heighten the feeling that her every nerve was electric. It burned so good - it was a shame for it all to be over all too quickly.  

"Done!" Jasper suddenly declared, causing the couple to stop and look over at him with Henry and Charlotte. And good god, he made for a horrible sight. His breathing was ragged, clothes ruffled, and a serious yet determined expression haunted his features for a good reason; up his arms were dozens of red bitemarks, so fresh that the teeth marks were still evident, but despite how woozy the venomous bites made him feel, he was surprisingly chirpy. 

"That snake did not want to wear a hat," he slurred and pointed to the creature, which now wore a jaunty black trilby with red pom-poms. It was a victory, but at what cost?

"Ugh, I'll go get the anti-venom," (y/n) groaned, shuffling her way to her supersized medikit, which held all the essential but not everyday medical supplies. Whilst she seemed annoyed - and that was reasonable given that all of this was avoidable had Ray listened - no part of her wanted Jasper to die, so as he swayed on his feet, she rushed to get the medicine before he keeled over. 

"Round one goes to Jasper!" And in the meantime, Ray proclaimed him the winner by grabbing his sore arm and raising it above his head like a victorious boxer in the ring. The news was devastating for Henry and Charlotte, who threw back their heads to groan and howl curses at the sky as they found their cowardly selves one point behind the now-collapsed Jasper. 

They'd scored even. They'd get that point back. They'd get to sit in that chair as was their right. Just as soon as (y/n) came back to get Jasper back on his feet because a dead competitor would be a real downer for the first-ever Ray Games. 

~

The next challenge would bring new opportunities, determination and dangers. As Ray explained to his beloved fiancée when she questioned why the couch was so important, whoever held on the longest whilst being spun and whisked to hell was the winner. And that definitely didn't sound scary to (y/n) at all - not after she managed to get Jasper back on his feet. 

Her first aid kit would be at her side as she was at her doofus' at all times. 

"Last one on the couch wins this round!" Ray shouted to the teens as they each sat on the back of the couch whilst it continuously rotated like some medieval torture device. To some, it might have looked similar to a fun, childish playground ride - the sort found in an amusement park since they were enjoying a lot more than they thought they would. But, little did they know, it was about to get a lot worse. 

"I'm good!"

"Not even dizzy!"

"Let me know when it's gonna get tough," they retorted, smug smirks painted on their faces because the gentle spin felt fine. They would be Jasper's famous last words; however, as (y/n) and Schwoz knew, the man standing next to them didn't like to make things easy. 

"Make it tough," he murmured to Schwoz, who held the remote for the couch's controls as the Man Cave's head technician. They wouldn't be so cocky when he increased the speed tenfold. 

Smirking, the genius did as he was told, cranking forward a lever and pressing a red button, which had an instant effect. Immediately, the teens felt the couch lurch, and they had to grip the cushioned back to ensure they didn't fly off as they gained momentum. Holding on was excruciating for their small arm muscles, and (y/n) threw her doofus a scolding look for being so reckless, especially when the three bodies began to blur and scream. 

"Raymond..." she growled at him lowly, giving him a stern eye that had him biting his lip sheepishly when Charlotte was the first to go. Her fingers couldn't hold on, and as they slipped from the leather, the couch flung her across the room, so it was good that the heroine had thought to lay some pillows out. 

The landing was soft, but Jasper still found it hilarious, meaning he cackled and pointed when he saw his friend disappear, but letting go of the couch to point was a bad idea. He went backwards, too, landing in a rough-and-tumble pile near the supercomputer, so Henry was the only one left to endure the pain. According to Ray's rules, he was the winner, but to his confusion and horror, the spinning didn't stop. 

"You gonna turn it off?" Schwoz yelled to his boss over the noise as they observed the little experiment. (y/n) looked up at her lover as she clung to his arm, expecting him to call for the end since the round was technically over, but to their shock, too, his smouldering face didn't move an inch. 

"I'm thinking about it..." he said slowly, enjoying the power rush he got from leading The Ray Games and the sight of Henry in so much discomfort, too much to let it go. He wanted to savour the view, maybe snap a few pictures and giggle a bit more, but the boy was desperate. 

"I win! I win! Turn it off! Turn it off!--" Henry begged in vain, his knuckles turning white from how they gripped the couch with all his might, but it wasn't enough in the end. Like the others, the momentum grew too substantial, catapulting him to the teenage pillow pile across the floor. 

"Okay, now I'll turn it off!" Ray grinned, giggling with Schwoz at how hilarious it was to see the kids comically sailing through the air. They looked at the groaning mountain behind the sofa, which slowly returned to a stationary position after (y/n) pulled the lever again with an unimpressed eye roll. Anti-venom, she could do. Cuts and bruises, she could do. Multiple broken bones and fractures, however - not a chance.

"How many more have you got planned?" she asked him, a tired edge to her voice at the thought of possible injuries. As thrilling as human biology was, it wasn't how she'd planned to spend her afternoon; instead, she'd scheduled a nap, which was now shelved for whatever scheme was next. 

And, sadly, horribly, excruciatingly, the end wasn't in sight.

"Oh, believe me, sweetheart. I'm full of surprises," Ray replied, turning his head to kiss her nose, so it crumpled cutely. He loved that about her and how she blushed and failed to hide her smile with annoyance. 

And she loved how he surprised her more and more with each passing day as they fell further and further in love. She only hoped this surprise didn't involve hosing down the walls or calling loved ones.

~

The next challenge was...odd. And that was putting it mildly.

Whoever tossed the huge and heavy beanbag the furthest was the winner. It seemed so simple and not weird, so Henry and Charlotte were up for it...until Jasper stepped out in his Ray Games outfit. Inch after inch of skin-tight, silky smooth lycra stretched over his body in the form of a red, star-spangled leotard, which hugged his body so closely it showed everything. Absolutely everything.

Upon stepping out to show everyone, Ray's hand clamped over his sweet girl's eyes to shield her from the unholy sight of Jasper's every curve and contour--all of them. It wasn't fit for a lady, and certainly not one so sweet and adoring of the boy, but no one else was so lucky. They had to see Jasper in all his tomato-ish glory.

He said it aided concentration and athleticism, which no one believed as the other teens took their turns to moderate success. Surprisingly, despite his heroic training and workouts, Charlotte managed to lob the bag further than Henry. He said it was born from the pure grit and determination to score herself a point and even the odds, but everyone knew he was just salty to be beaten by a girl. 

Lastly, it was Jasper's go, complete in his god-awful outfit, which (y/n) had seen enough of when Ray mistakenly removed his hand from her view. Time for the suit to prove its worth.

He spun once. He circled twice, and after gaining some force in his throw, Jasper let go of the bean bag, sending it hurtling across the Man Cave toward Schwoz, the official adjudicator of this round. The man fell over like a skittle hit by a bowling ball, utterly stunned by the bag, which felt like a brick wall as it hit him, but there was one exciting thing. 

No one else had thrown it that far.

"Winner!" Schwoz declared and held up a flag that depicted the victorious boy's face on the material. Henry and Charlotte couldn't believe it and hung their heads as they groaned in defeat; how had he, in that stupid leotard, managed to do that? How did he beat them?

"Points to Jasper!" Ray declared, beaming a fair and pleasant smile across the room and tightened his hold around (y/n)'s waist when the boy growled in triumph and flexed his arms. His muscles were by no means on par with Captain Man's, but they were still substantial, which didn't seem right on her beloved Curly. He used to be so soft, squishy and innocent - why did they all have to grow up?

"My singlet gives me strength," he snarled with his teeth bared and his hands on his hips, which showed off more than his friends wanted to see. Again, not something for the ladies in the room to see, nor the men, to be honest.

"Your singlet gives me the creeps."

"Yeah, no offence, Curly, but I feel highly uncomfortable seeing you...all of you..." (y/n) agreed with Charlotte as the girl sat on the couch's back with Henry, her chin perched on her palm. The woman refused to look in the boy's direction, and if she had to, always kept her eyes angled upwards as she was terrified of seeing something scarring. 

So, to spare her rose-tinted view of his purity, Ray cupped her cheek and turned her gaze towards him. Wondering what he wanted, she stared at him with wide, curious eyes, only to take in his soft expression before he tilted her lips to meet his. 

A welcome distraction, one that pushed Jasper's singlet into the corner of her mind where it could be locked away forever and replaced by something much more agreeable. She repulsed the idea of Jasper's humps, lumps and bumps, but she'd never minded Ray's. 

They were a winner every time in her eyes.

~

Next round, and this time, things got fancy. 

Ray took his games very seriously and decided that, for this challenge, he'd replicate that nationally loved game show he and his sweet girl put on for background noise when eating Chinese and making out.

Henry, Jasper, thankfully clothed this time, and Charlotte acted as contestants with their podiums as he, (y/n), and Schwoz played the lovable hosts. Never one to skimp on showing off, the hero ordered his handyman to put on his flashiest suit, which was bright and tacky in Schwoz's wardrobe - a vivid pink, flowery suit jacket which showed off his gold jewellery. Nice.

Ray donned his full-blown tux and strolled around the Man Cave like a model from a perfume ad. He looked good, he knew that and smirked like the cat who got the cream when the others complemented his style, but nothing stroked his ego like the sound of Charlotte telling his sweet girl to pick up her tongue from the floor and focus.

Dear god, his sweet girl. His sweet, pretty, darling, insanely hot girl. She was his glamourous assistant, dressed to impress like any game show girl in her silken, cowl-neck dress and heels that perfectly smoothed over her ass and hips, making him want to run his hands over them. Her earrings and necklace were austere and delicate enough to compliment her pinned-up hair, engagement ring and décolletage.

Quite simply, she looked exquisite, and he soon heard Henry and Jasper's jeers telling him to pick his jaw up from the floor and return to being their dashing host.

"Over to you, Jasper," Ray spoke into his absurdly long and thin microphone after turning from a giant, illuminated board of letters to the boy. Everyone knew he was staring at (y/n) instead of the fragmented phrase they had to guess, but they didn't mention it. The massage chair was the thing to remember. 

"Is there a three?" the dimwitted kid queried, trying to chip away at the answer until it resembled an easy-to-guess, idiomatic phrase. The only problem was that he was unbelievably bad when it came to academic riddle solving and giving guesses, unlike Charlotte, who stood next to him with what could only be the correct answer raring to go.

"It's--it's a phrase, Jasper. Just words, no numbers,"  (y/n) reminded him, a frown etched onto her face since his question was so poor and bizarre. Did they need to explain the rules again?

"Oh, right-right-right-right!" the boy quickly nodded, his brain back up to speed again, so he figured it was time for another go. But, this time, he'd take a perilous plunge, "I'd like to solve it."

"Not your turn anymore," Ray told him frankly since he had his chance and given a three--that was his query over. However, the boy was determined, just as Ray was stubborn.

"I'd still like to solve it."

"Over to you, Henry," the hero ignored him and turned to his youngest sidekick, who was a middle-of-the-range kid; not a brainiac like Charlotte, but not a numskull like Jasper, who wilted at the idea of waiting for another session before he could make a stab in the dark.

"Is there an S?" the blond kid asked, chiselling away at the phrase even more, and victoriously smiled when several blocks illuminated blue and (y/n) and Schwoz dashed out to highlight them. Four S's, to be precise, made things a whole lot easier for Henry. Or so he thought...

"There is an S!"

"Okay, I'd like to solve the puzzle," he announced, drawing some surprised glances from his friends, who weren't expecting him to be so bold. 

"Go ahead," Ray nodded and pointed his stick microphone at him as Henry narrowed his gaze on the board. The stage was set, and there could be no other answer in his head, so he spoke confidently and clearly.

"The phrase is Blessing In Disguise," he stated, thinking his response was foolproof since that was the correct idiom. However, he was horrified when the dull hum of the incorrect buzzer sounded, proving that he was so close and yet far, and for an idiotic reason.

"Oh, I'm sorry!"

"What?!" he gasped as Ray gave him one of that sympathetic yet annoyingly smug gameshow host faces for his depressing defeat. It was so rehearsed and disingenuous that it made his blood boil; the slight wince on (y/n)'s face felt so much more natural, possibly because her doofus had whispered the genuine answer in her ear two minutes before biting at her earlobe for looking too beautiful. Henry would flip when someone else solved it - Ray was an absolute doofus.

"You're wrong."

"What do you mean? What else could it possibly be?!" he asked furiously, stumped since he couldn't think of anything else, but he didn't know Ray's mind. Honestly, no one did. (y/n) was the best at it and could make a pretty good guess, but even she wasn't one hundred per cent sure. 

Charlotte, though, was not such an expert, nor did she claim to be. However, she could make an educated guess, and by her calculations, the three things swimming around his dusty old noddle were how amazing he thought he was, many memories of his sweet girl laughing, smiling, kissing, dancing, sleeping and loving him, and standard information which was easy for others, but impossible for him to figure out.

"I'd like to solve the puzzle," she said softly and raised her hand as it became her turn.

"Go ahead, Charlotte."

"Ray thinks the phrase is Blessing In Da' Skies!" she revealed, causing Henry to scoff at how arrogantly clever she was and how amazingly moronic his boss was. Ray exclaimed her intelligence and pointed at the board as all of the letters appeared for the wrong phrase, which caused (y/n)'s need for perfection and accuracy to weep, but her lover was cutely dumb, so she let it slide--unlike Henry.

"Th-that's not even a phrase, dude! That's not the phrase," he argued, making Ray frown since that's what he'd always known it as. Hell, he'd whispered it to his gorgeous girl, and she'd laughed and nodded, said he was the most adorable man she'd ever met before pulling him in for a kiss. If that were the result that answer got him, then he'd say it every time.

"Yes, it is!"

"And why is there an exclamation point at the end?!" Jasper asked indignantly, also miffed at how they'd been duped. It wasn't like he'd ever stood a chance at winning compared to Charlotte, but his prospects had been reduced to well below zero with the wacky punctuation.

"Because that's how you say the phrase? Like, look at those clouds! They're a blessing in da' skies! Right, sweet girl?" Ray proposed, trying to make them see his thoughts, so he brought in the cleverest person he knew - his beloved fiancée - to convince them. Slight problem, though; she was ever so slightly biased and not precisely a fair judge.

"Aw, if you say so, doofus," she cooed, heart melted from the unique and magical way he saw the world. He wasn't weird to her--he was brilliant, so worthy of the kiss they shared as she tottered into his arms with an enamoured grin. 

"You are so dumb! And you've tricked (y/n) into thinking you're smart!"

"So wrong! How did you get a girl like her?!" the boys cried moodily, bitter from losing and how their boss had stopped listening to their complaints. He focused solely on his precious girl, who giggled and whispered silly, little words of love into his ear as her fingers tweaked his bowtie and straightened it. 

Henry and Jasper were right about one thing; Ray Manchester was the complete opposite of (y/n) (y/l/n), slow to understand, even slower to remember, and yet she thought he was a god amongst men. 

But there was one thing they didn't see; somehow, that moron had made the girl of his dreams fall in love with him. He, of all people, was chosen out of all the losers hoping to take her out, and he, the mortal before the goddess, made her want to marry him.

He had to be pretty damn smart to pull that off. 

~

The afternoon dragged by, yet there was still no end in sight. Round, after round, with a small break after the mini gameshow for Ray (y/n) and Schwoz to change out of their costumes. Well, it started as a wardrobe change but became longer when the happy couple got distracted by Ray's undoing of (y/n)'s dress zipper for her. 

No one dared interrupt. They feared what they might see, thinking it was best for them to reappear themselves. And they did, happier than before and suspiciously redfaced, but again, the kids and Schwoz stayed silent. Loose lips, lower zips.

Anyway, Henry, Jasper and Charlotte kept their eyes on the prize, and no matter what Ray told them to do, they did it. Whether it be crazy, dangerous, or a little bit of both, they racked up points like (y/n) racked up loyalty rewards at her favourite cafe for hazelnut latte purchases, and they didn't tire, even if it was slowly becoming dull.

The next test was a simple eating challenge, a snack break depending on how they looked at it, and that was fine. Although, being able to use their hands for the floating doughnuts would've been nice.

"First one to finish their dangling doughnuts wins this round!" Ray told the kids, who licked their lips at the thought of munching the sugar-coated treats in front of them. That didn't sound like much of a challenge, more like lunch. 

"How hard can that be?" Henry asked, snickering at his boss for doubting his skills, which made Ray and (y/n) share an amused look. Oh, what he didn't know...

"Harder than you think," the woman told the cocky boy, who shrugged off her warning with a scoff. Any idiot could eat doughnuts, even if they had their hands bound, so he concentrated on the snacks in front of him and waited for Ray's mark.

"And...go nuts on those doughnuts!" the hero announced, and they were off. Schwoz encouraged their eating by singing an annoying and strange song, but the kids ignored him before he broke their concentration. 

It turns out that (y/n) was right; no matter how they wiggled their tongues or how wide they opened their jaws, Henry and Charlotte couldn't get a firm bite of the doughnuts, not even one. All they did was smear powered sugar across their lips, but surprisingly, Jasper was rather good last it.

"Done!" he panted just as Schwoz finished the first line of his chant, causing everyone to pause and look at him in wonder. Sugar dusted his entire face, from his mouth to his eyebrows, and the extreme effort made his chest heave, but the doughnuts were gone. How he wolfed them down was a mystery, but the rules were the rules, no matter how shocking the result was.

"Jasper wins again!" Ray announced, an element of amazement in his voice as he'd always seen the kid as a bit of an idiot, but he'd done well to pass so many challenges. How badly did he want that chair?

"What?! I really want that chair!"

"Are you kidding me?!" Henry and Charlotte exclaimed angrily, feeling cheated and betrayed by their friend, who undoubtedly had indigestion after such a big meal. It served him right...freak.

"Oh, yeah? Do you really want that chair?" Ray mysteriously asked them, his finger trailing up and down (y/n)'s arm as if he wasn't interested in their longing. His sweet girl squirmed under his touch, giggling as he acted like an idiot, but for the three teens, there was no room for joking. 

"I think that has been established," Jasper growled, his voice animalistic and deep after succumbing to his instincts to screw everything and everyone to get what he wanted. The doughnuts were the first to be shredded; next would be whoever or whatever stood in his way - no matter the challenge. 

"You want it enough to die for it?" the man pressed, squatting next to the feral boy as he longed for relaxation and triumph. It's true; Jasper did want that chair, but dying for it was a bit extreme, even for him.

"Uh, no."

"Yeah, me neither."

"Want it, not that much." And his friends were quick to agree with him as (y/n), and Schwoz squatted too, confused frowns on their faces. Nothing like that was worth dying over, so when Ray looked to his pretty girl for help, a quick smile and a warm hand between his shoulder blades told him to keep going, but in a different direction.

"Well, are you willing to stand in one place for a long time for it?!" he proposed, which sounded much more acceptable, so they readily agreed. Whatever he had in store for them, Henry, Jasper and Charlotte knew they could do it for the Royal Relaxer, even if they'd been jumping through hoops like flying monkeys all afternoon. 

Still, standing in one place didn't sound bad. How hard could it be?

~

Quite bad. Balancing was the key. Ray's next challenge was simple, yet again, but also dull. Really dull. Schwoz had kindly set up three wooden logs in the room, tall enough for some height and thin enough to make standing on it tricky.

Yes, they were standing on them. That was the challenge - to see who could stay on their log for the longest and not fall off and break their leg. And that was fine. No issues. Charlotte had it on lock, hands in her pockets and everything as she found a perfect position with her centre of gravity aligned with the wooden pole, and a few seconds later, Henry and Jasper figured it out too.

The only thing left to prove was who would crack first.

"Still think this is better than dying?" Ray asked them huskily, his arms folded to try and appear menacing, but how scary could a man look when he had a sleepy girl resting her weary head against his bicep? 

"I do."

"Yeah, me too."

"This pole feels good under my feet," they replied smoothly, causing him to pause. Henry was on one leg, for god's sake, and yet he didn't break a sweat at all, meaning Ray's plan to make them subtly was wholly backfiring.

"Huh...okay," he hummed, eyebrows twitching at how they remained perfectly in balance and made his "difficult" task look like child's play, 

"Well, while we are waiting for two of you to fall, let's listen to some more of How To Be A Boss Boss," he smirked when the kids groaned at the thought, but he didn't care for two excellent reasons. One, his sweet girl was still exhausted from her poor sleep schedule, and now he'd realised that he swore that he'd let her rest for as long as possible - no funny business - so he guided her over to the couch where she could cuddle without standing. 

And two, Henry, Charlotte and Jasper wouldn't be able to wait to get off those poles once the audio started - that's how bad it was.

"Come on, sweet girl.."

"I'msosleepy..."

"I know, come on," he whispered as he slid into the gap between the couch and table, leaving a wide space for her to sit next to him. (y/n)'s word slurred into a murmured mess as his side opened up, and his arm brought her into his warmth, deepening the growing need to nap, which made Ray smile gently at how precious and tiny she looked. 

The boss boss was smitten, but nobody could blame him. She was pretty cute. 

"Chapter Two! Why you should never let your employees use the bathroom," an annoying male voice enunciated from the man's phone as (y/n) huffed and rubbed her face into his shirt. The audiobook was a load of shit, and she had numerous reasons, mainly legal ones, as to why that was a bad idea, but Ray didn't want to be a bad boss - he just wanted to tempt his employees into quitting.

"Smart..." he muttered, which earned him a slap on the shoulder, given that it was so not bright, more like utterly ridiculous.

"Yeah, we're not doing that. Doofus, how much of this crap do we have to listen to?" she asked quietly, words evaporating into his shirt, but they were still audible. She'd never be able to fall asleep knowing that he was filling his head with such nonsense, but even after hearing her concerns, Ray smiled and kissed the top of her silly, little, worrying head.

"Shhhh, don't worry about it, darlin'. You just shut your eyes and rest while I listen to this," he told her, stroking her hair soothingly as if it would lull her to sleep. And, in a way, it helped. 

Feeling her doofus wrapped around her, whispering calming, loving words into her ear over the dumb man from the book made sleep close in quicker, the overwhelming exhaustion sweeping over her like a blanket, but she still worried. Of course, she did--it's what (y/n) did. Oh well, at least she knew he'd be there when she woke up again, and should he do anything stupid, she'd be there to sort it out.

~Half an hour later~

The chapter was tedious. Annoyingly so. So annoying that Henry, Jasper and Charlotte were at the stage of plotting Ray's death because he was the one subjecting them to the audiobook torture. 

The first ten chapters were terrible enough. A load of bullshit that only an idiot would believe, but he lapped it up, even to the point where he felt the need to up sticks and plonk himself and (y/n) at the supercomputer so "she could be more comfortable". How she didn't wake up during the process was a mystery, but they figured she was just that tired. 

So, he sprawled out and reclined in the computer's chair with his feet on the console, strained under two people's weight since Ray insisted that his sweet girl remains with him. It didn't look comfortable straddling his lap with her arms limply hung around his neck and her feet touching the ground, but hey, what did the kids know? 

Merely that, by chapter twenty-six (and counting), death was a luxury afforded to so few. 

"Chapter twenty-seven, how to take other people's ideas and claim them as your own," the author narrated as one part finished and another began, but even for Ray, the cycle was getting boring. Schwoz had his head in his hands as he sat on the couch, and the teens ignored how tired and crampy their legs felt after standing on the wood for so long since the competition was the only thing that mattered. 

They'd never tell Ray that they planned to make him wait. After all, patience wasn't his strongest suit unless it was for something significant - like a wedding - so they let him suffer because that's where they could scrape out some fun.

"Ughhhhhh! This contest is taking forever!" he groaned and clicked off the podcast before it gave him a migraine. Now, he'd never complain about his girl napping in his lap, but after thirty minutes, he needed to adjust his position, so carefully sat upright so as not to push her on the floor, causing (y/n) to mumble dozily before settling down again. Good, he didn't want to ruin her beauty sleep, even if he craved entertainment in the form of her lips on his. 

"How can we speed this up?" he quizzed Schwoz softly, mindful of the pretty woman pressing her nose against his neck, and he secured her against his chest even as he hunched over a tad. The sooner they wrapped this up, the sooner he could get her to bed, but when would that be?

"We could throw stuff at them," the genius suggested, much to the horror of the three on poles. They gasped at the idea of being mocked and taunted like sideshow animals and glared at Schwoz for even thinking of such an idea. Therefore, it was nice that Ray swiftly shot it down.

"What?!"

"No!"

"That's a terrible idea," Ray said with his head bowed, meaning he could press a kiss to (y/n)'s temple, rousing her just a little bit from her slumber. 

"Thank you!" Jasper said firmly, glad that his boss was being sensible for once. However, Ray had also listened to a book for once, which was dangerous in itself.

"But..." he pondered, a brilliant thought popping into his mind and taking root so he couldn't ignore it. The urge was so strong that he stood up gently, and no sooner than he took her weight, he deposited (y/n) on the chair so he was free to wander. And obviously, that made her heavy eyelids crack open to find out what the hell was going on and why her doofus' lap suddenly felt so flat and hard.

"Since when did I get over here?" she muttered, looking around the room with a comically puzzled expression and an even funnier appearance, given her tousled hair and half-shut eyes. But Ray's train of thought was already full steam ahead, overtaking anything in its path because that's what boss bosses do.

"Your bad idea did just give me a great idea--what if we throw stuff at them?" he proposed with a smirk, and the complete rip-off made Schwoz do a double-take.

"I just said, what if we--"

"My idea! We're doing it!" The poor guy tried to stick up for himself, but after listening to nothing but the audiobook and his girl's shallow, regular breathing, Ray needed stimulation. And besides, the book said it was okay to steal ideas because he was in charge, so everything was fine.  

"What have I missed?" (y/n) asked, her head tilting in confusion at her lover's words. She was never at her best when tired; things didn't process in that neat and efficient brain as they usually did, her ability to multiply up to her sixteen times tables diminished, and the gravity of Ray's dumb actions didn't weigh her down until it was too late.

"Dude, you can't just throw stuff at us," Henry stated, quickly bringing her up to speed, and suddenly, Ray felt as though everyone in the room expected him to excuse his actions.

"Yeah, that's not fair," Jasper added, but Ray wasn't listening. Just because they expected something from him didn't mean he had to provide evidence or something. The Man Cave was not a courtroom, but if it were, he'd be the judge, not the other way around.

"One bowl of the finest throwin' foods, please."

"One bowl of the throwin' foods." Oh, no, he didn't. The group watched in annoyance and terror as their leader smacked his palm against the auto-snacker's screen to request some ammo, and Henry, Jasper, and Char didn't fancy being pelted with all the icky, mushy, out-of-date food that no one wanted to eat. 

"Noooo!" the girl howled as she threw her head back, watching as Ray took the bowl from the snacker to begin what would be awful for them but so much fun for him.

"Let's get this done!" he cheered, taking a banana and lobbing it at Charlotte, who couldn't do much more than duck and pray her flailing arms didn't knock her off balance. Instantly, the teens shouted for him to stop and cursed Schwoz when he joined in too, which only left (y/n) as help.

"(y/n)!"

"HELP US!" they screamed, wobbling all over the place as oranges, lemons, bananas, apples, and more hurtled past their heads and occasionally battered their torsos. Each time, they risked falling off, either from moving too much or from the pain of taking an apple to the ribcage, and (y/n) was concerned, of course. But, also, she was so damn tired.

"Ray..mond. That's so very naughty of you..." she muttered, using all of her strength to pick up her head, shuffling her feet, despite them feeling like two lumps and lead, and moving over to Ray.

However, when she got there, all she could muster was a limp smack to his bicep, and even then, she only managed to clip a millimetre of his skin since he moved out of the way to throw more fruit. In short, she really put him in his place, and Ray definitely learned his lesson.

"Yeah, yeah, sweet girl, punish me later!" he rambled quickly, saying anything to relax and go back to sleep. That way, he could go back to having fun without feeling guilty, but if anything, (y/n) wasn't focused on telling him off anymore, more like fanning her hot cheeks at such a thought.

"Oh, come on! Stay strong, (y/n), just because he's your--" Jasper argued, seeing how the woman, drowning in her tiredness and confusion, short-circuited at such a notion and blushed like a schoolgirl - or worse, the old (y/n), who swore she'd never thought about how cute her best friend's butt was.

But, try as he might, the boy's mission to snap her out of it failed when Ray landed an orange on his nose. Jasper threw his head back as pain bloomed across his face, and the momentum meant he painfully fell backwards onto the floor, ruling him out for the round. Damn, and he was doing so well.

"You're out, dude!" Henry noted as he watched Ray and Schwoz share a high-five whilst (y/n) did her best to glare at them, even if she did look slightly odd telling off a giant twice her size. But it was a mistake taking his eyes off them for a second because when he did, to gloat at Jasper for falling, Schwoz took his chance and launched more fruit, hitting him in the crotch. And that was the end of Henry's success.

So, to her delight and as Henry writhed in agony from the blow and fall, Charlotte realised she was the last one standing, meaning she was the victor. She'd not won many rounds, so it was nice to claw back a point, but even nicer to catch a banana thrown by the handyman and return it to sender. 

"Ayeee!" Schwoz groaned as the yellow fruit hit him on his smooth forehead, causing him to keel over, much to (y/n)'s amusement. He'd deserved that.

"Nicely done, Char," she smiled, glad to see the girl win and give the small man a taste of his own medicine, even through blurred vision. Another challenge finished--thank god--all that mattered now was to see what they had to do next.

"So, did I win?" the girl asked her boss excitedly, eager to know if that last point was the deciding one. Honestly, they'd done so many rounds no one knew who was in the lead anymore since everyone had won their fair share. 

"You won that round," Ray nodded, quickly shooting down her wide grin. Why did he have to keep them in suspense after making them work for so long? Couldn't he tell them?

"But who's in the overall lead?" Jasper asked, desperate to know the answer.

"Good question... doofus, please show us the leaderboard before I fall asleep again," (y/n) requested through a yawn, fearing she'd properly drop off and never get to see the crowned winner. Her wish was Ray's command, and he pressed a button on his controller to bring up the scores on a screen as his arm wrapped around her shoulders. 

The results were depressing - at least they were to Charlotte and Henry.

"Boom! That chair is about to have this guy's butt groove in it!" Jasper exclaimed joyfully when he saw the screen. He sat on a pretty five hundred and seventy-two points, miles ahead of Charlotte on one-seven-eight and Henry with his measly fifty-four. There was no way for his friends to close such a gaping crevasse of a lead, so he assumed he'd won, and they weren't happy about that.

"Whatever..." Henry and Charlotte scoffed, acting as though they'd never been interested in the Royal Relaxer. The jealousy was apparent, however, and (y/n) would've offered them her sympathies on being good but not quite good enough, but that's when Ray jumped in.

"Now, now...don't count your butt grooves before you've sat," he said weirdly, which didn't make sense to his family. Reading between the lines to understand his meaning, the boy and girl thought he was insane because how were they supposed to win when Jasper was four hundred points ahead?

"What? Dude, look at the board. The game is basically over."

"Oh, it would be..."

"Raymond..." (y/n) said lowly, sensing a mischievous lilt in her fiancé's voice, and whilst she loved his playful nature, now wasn't the time to make fun of the kids' bruised egos.

"If the final round wasn't worth ten million points!" And there it was—mischief beyond belief. The three gasped; henry and Charlotte out of shock-happiness at the thought of another chance, but Jasper out of shock-horror that he'd been cheated. It felt like a low, dirty, cheating lie that pulled the win out from underneath him.

"What?!"

"Yes!"

"But that's way too many points!" he argued in the name of fairness, but all it got him was a mean, judgemental glare from the boss.

"What's your problem?" Ray asked sharply, looking down his nose at the boy from over his shoulder. Could he not see that he was busy, basking in the attention of his sweet girl, who'd tugged at his sleeve to gain his?

"My problem is the previous rounds meant nothing!" Jasper snapped, sounding distraught as he thought about the turmoil and utter crap he'd been through for the contest, which was now all for nothing. 

"I got bit by a death snake! I wore very tight clothing to throw a bean bag!"

"Don't lie, Curly. We all know you liked that," (y/n) smirked, remembering how the boy loved flexing and walking around in the terrifyingly thin, breezy material. Everyone else hated it, but Jasper had never felt so free, something he couldn't deny.

"I did, but I'm still mad!"

"Just tell us about the final round," Henry said to Ray, ignoring his best friend's complaints since he was more bothered about having one last chance to earn a go in the massage chair than the injustice of it all. Maybe he'd let Jasper have a go after him, but first, it was all to play for.

"To win the final round, you'll have to use your brains..." Ray cryptically revealed as he perched his butt on the corner of the couch's back, (y/n) pulled into him so he could hold her - her back to his chest in a cuddly spoon.

"Yes!"

"No!" Charlotte and Jasper cried, the former thinking half the work was already done, whilst the latter assumed it was all over. Charlotte's superpower was his kryptonite, which left Henry in the middle; he wasn't dumb, but he wasn't insanely intelligent like his friend, so, like Jasper, he felt stuck too or entirely screwed.

"So, what do we have to do?" Charlotte questioned as the man finished whispering in his girl's ear, hurriedly detailing his plan to her, so she knew how devious it was. And judging by the huffed giggle from the scandalised woman, it was downright evil, enticing her further since (y/n) was an intellectual like her.

"You'll have to outsmart a monster," Ray told them, which made (y/n) bite back a smile. It was nasty to put it like that, especially when she was friends with the monster, but by the time the teens irritated her, the beast would be...monstrous.

"Pffft, monsters aren't real," Henry scoffed, not realising that he had a home advantage--specialist knowledge on how to smite the dragon waiting for them.

"He's talking about your sister," (y/n) deadpanned as she stood between Ray's legs and leaned against his chest, loving how they gasped at such an idea—outsmarting Piper. That wasn't just dangerous; that was suicidal - she could be lethal when disturbed.

"Piper?!"

"That's right. First person to get Henry's sister to give them her phone," that was a death wish, "take a selfie," she could kill someone for even looking at her baby, "and send it to (y/n)'s phone from her number wins the massage chair."

"Get in, take the selfie, get out. It's that simple. Oh, and don't die. Good luck!" the woman grinned at them as she showed them her phone, the only unbiased one in the Man Cave that had Piper's number since they texted about boys, cafe catch-ups and movie outings. And Ray loved having her involved - it gave him yet another excuse to keep her by his side - so he waved them off, enjoying the ensuing stampede as the game commenced.

Henry, Jasper and Charlotte scrambled for the tubes, much to the adults' amusement since there was only just enough room for three people to squeeze in, and two would have to share. The winner would have to think on their feet, be resourceful, witty, cunning, charismatic, and most importantly, fearless. 

(y/n)'s money was on Charlotte since she was clever, but Henry was a good each way bet, given the familial connection. However, Jasper had surprised everyone by getting so far on the other rounds, so she was left on the fence.

"This book is amazing, sweet girl. It's a shame you were so sleepy when I was listening to it," Ray murmured in her ear, drawing (y/n) out of her daydream on who would win and lose. It took a few seconds for her to realise that he was talking about the audiobook, and that's when she disagreed. Amazing isn't the word she'd use.

"Yeah...I can see that, handsome," (y/n) frowned as she watched the kids argue over who got to go up the tube first, each pushing, shoving and kicking to try and get in front. It didn't speak order and control from a boss in command to her, but as bad as it sounded, she didn't care. 

Part of her wanted to go and claim the massage chair for herself since it had caused absolute chaos in her home that afternoon, but no. She was a good boss and didn't want any more arguing, so like a tired mother, she asked for the one thing she desperately wanted and deserved after dealing with children all day.

"Hey, Ray?"

"Yeah, darlin'?"

"Can we please go to bed now?" And you know what? She ran the damn place, kept him sane, kept Schwoz from overworking himself, kept the kids happy and healthy, did the laundry, did the cleaning, did the shopkeeping, did repairs, and did wonders. So, it was the least Ray could do to give her his warmest smile and pick her up bridal style to give the boss the break she deserved.

~Forty minutes later~

(y/n) had missed sleep. She never missed it until she went without, but when she finally got a few moments to close her eyes, she remembered why it was so damn popular. And, not to brag, she was certain that whilst other people slept, she slept.

Her sleep was always in the biggest, comfiest bed on the market because her lover was a go-big-or-go-home man. Her sleep was always with the softest Egyptian cotton money could buy because she hated silk sheets, but her lover wanted her happy. Her sleep was always undisturbed because her lover would hunt down any asshole who dared to walk too loudly or play their music for the whole neighbourhood to hear. 

But the best part was her favourite. Her sleep came with the gentlest, cuddliest, doofiest bodypillow around. 

He took up half the bed; with a frame like that, it was inevitable, and whenever he slipped in as he did after tucking her between the sheets, it was like the vast space shrunk. 

He was a walking furnace; that's why she loved his shirts or the thinnest pyjamas for nightwear because his warmth seeped into her skin and lulled her into peaceful dreams. And, best of all, she could hear his heart jumping out in a constant rhythm when he let her snuggle into him. It meant he was there, alive, breathing, resting just like she was, and there was no other feeling like it.

Ding.

Fuck the contest. 

That was her first thought. Forty minutes past was too early to get up, mainly since she'd only managed to doze since getting into bed with Ray. He'd placed her so carefully as if the mattress underneath wouldn't break her fall, and as she dove into pure white softness, he peeled off his shirt for her benefit. Only so she could feel his skin on hers and put her ear above his heart with no barriers.

Ding.

I've raised them for four years. Can't they give me another five minutes?

Her second thought. Ray stirred, too, his hand wandering up her spine as he ignored the second notification. He wasn't asleep; she could tell from how he hadn't fully relaxed, and her chest clenched at the thought of him staying only for her. It couldn't be comfortable; yes, he'd removed his shirt, but he couldn't be bothered to take off his jeans, so they stayed on and undoubtedly felt hot and clingy under the thick comforter. 

However, he was at peace as he always was in their bedroom - the only place where it was only ever just him and his girl. No Captain Man. No Miss Danger. No Schwoz. No kids. No need to be the boss. No need to be strong. No need to always be okay because it was just them. And when they lived as heroes twenty-four-seven, it was a welcome relief.

He'd never tell her, but simple moments like this made up his mind. He'd slept with dozens of girls in his arms, and he wasn't proud of that, but he was proud for finally realising that only one was meant to be there. And she tangled her legs with his every night since she asked for him to keep her safe from the nightmares that haunted her in the night.

"We should answer that," (y/n) mumbled, saying it, thinking it, acknowledging it was the responsible thing to do, but not moving despite that.

"Comfy..." Ray muttered in reply and rubbed his cheek affectionately against her head as it lay on his chest. She sighed, thinking the same thing as the seconds rolled past and blurred into minutes, both happy to doze in oblivion.

(y/n) was at peace, too, as she always was in their bedroom - the only place where it was just her and her doofus. She remembered the night she woke drenched in sweat and near tears from the almost real feeling of a monster dragging her back into the past to do more damage. She'd never wanted to wake Ray up and drag him down, but her mind swore the shadows were alive and something was hiding in the wardrobe, so she bolted. And she'd felt safe every night since he told her he'd hold her until she fell asleep again, even if it took until the morning.

Ding.

"Fuck."

Regret filled her as she lethargically pulled away from Ray's embrace because a third text couldn't be ignored, no matter how content they felt or how loudly he groaned from losing her. (y/n) huffed and puffed as she stretched to the nightstand, feeling around in the dim light for her cell.

The light burned her eyes as she squinted at the screen with a confused face as the squiggles reshaped to form letters, which composed words and sentences that didn't make sense. Three texts from three different teens, and all of them said the same thing.

"Look at this," she told her fiancé and held the phone in front of his face with a sudden burst of energy from the unexpected outcome of the competition. Ray squinted and grimaced at the brightness as she'd done before his eyes widened in shock. He'd predicted many things, but that wasn't of them.

"Well, shit," he grumbled and took the device from her hand so he could read the texts more closely and she could snuggle back down. From the messages' tones, Henry, Jasper and Charlotte weren't happy, but when in their bedroom and the blissful state of grace, Ray wasn't the boss, so he didn't care. 

"Good for her," he muttered before tossing his sweet girl's phone onto his table, where it would remain as he laid down properly and pulled her closer until they were joined at the hip with the comforter pulled up to their torsos. He'd keep her warm and safe until morning if he had to, and she'd happily stay there as long as he wanted her - and that was always.

Schwoz would come calling for help cleaning up the splattered fruit and news on who won when he peeked into the bedroom and saw the lovers fast asleep, knocked out cold, blissfully unaware of everything around them; he figured he'd find out later. 

Piper won. She'd out-hunted the ones hunting her and was happy in the massage chair. Henry, Charlotte and Jasper were happy to pay for a turn in it, and Mr Hart was happy just to be present. 

But no one could be happier than those two, doing the most natural thing in the world in their home, underneath a rundown shop on an average, busy street in Swellview but falling further in love as they did.