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delicrieux · 4 years

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☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 23: PRETTY BOY

emotions run wild when everyone is drunk and hardly coherent. quackity is always loud, but tonight is a full on assault on the senses (the ears, in particular). bretman simps for corpse too much for your liking. rae is happy for once. there’s a confession of love somewhere in there. sister james makes a very good impostor, but that’s old news, the real question is who gave you a knife? a new persona emerges that leaves the roaches quivering in their boots.

─── corpse husband x reader, a lil bit of everyone x reader (because she’s a queen) ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: a lil over 7k.

author’s note: it’s the way i can’t follow a fucking calendar for me. sorry guys, i swear to god i thought i had one more day before thursday . the idiot award goes to me and i accept it with pride. anyway, i was excited to write this for a while! quackity is in mexico, that’s why he drinks, too. my fic, my rules, he’s too funny not to include. im also working on an extra w dream and mr quack so look forward to that, too! hopefully u like this part ily xx and as always lmk wat u think!!

ultimate masterlist. ҉ myso masterlist ҉ previous. ҉ next.

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The outfit for today was picked with care and consideration. Hot, as always- you had forgotten your roots, your hoodie and sweats lay hidden in the bottom of your drawer never to be worn on stream again. You’ve changed. Clout really does that to people. Some viewers, naturally, find your hotness near insulting: how dare you rub your beauty in their faces, and so unabashedly, too?! If only you had a twinge of self-awareness, perhaps you would tone it down. But you don’t, and whether that’s by choice or not is the mystery the whole internet tries to solve (ARMY has been working diligently, and you admire their effort, though in the end their tireless labor brings no tangible results).

You went from hot to hotter. In all truth, the fires eating away at California can be blamed on you. You carry this burden in stride, in your platform overpriced shoes some girl scammed you on Depop with, in your fishnets, in your skirt, in your corset, in your rings and necklaces and chains. You woke up today and chose violence. Decided your existence will be a plague to the rest of the populace, and meant it (that, maybe, you took inspiration from a certain faceless Youtuber that so happens to be your boyfriend or whatever). You feel powerful. Like you could step on the world and the world would let you. You decide that it’s the way it should always be.

The smile on your lips informs of nothing good to your quaint, small audience of 40k. You change the lighting in your room from the soft cherry blossom pink to menacing violet. As fitting for a villain.

Perhaps California’s hellish sun has finally purged you of your bubbly, docile nature (arguably, you had never possessed it to begin with); perhaps it’s the forth mimosa you’re mixing as people slowly trickle into the lobby. Who knows?! Not you, definitely. What do all of those boring dead white European philosophers say? Embrace the unknown? Cheers, you’ll drink to that.

In stark contrast to your appearance, your room is a fucking mess. A war-zone of epic anime scale. Everything is scattered, well, everywhere. A perfect representation on what’s going on in your mind, always. You don’t like how people focus on your surroundings-- you’re the main attraction, hello? Are you not enough to sustain them? Must they beg for more?! Totally ungrateful. You shake your head in disappointment, as if a mother scolding her children.

noooooo! mom pls forgive me i will never ask abt anything ever again T_T

yall looking at the room? lol couldnt be me

feels like im five and my mum just told me i cant eat a pretty rock i found on the pavement:(

You can’t contain your sly grin. Eyes twinkle with a purplish hue, appearing all the more menacing. You tricked them once again, oh how absolutely evil of you. In your blind delight you accidentally spill champagne on your lap.

“-Oop, fuck.” You snort.

why does she sound like goofy

The scandalous drunk Among Us stream is about to start. You had been eerily silent through the greetings, and those that chose to approach you were met with a cold shoulder and minimal replies. All on purpose, of course. You wish to plant a seed of unease within them, and so far, it’s working. There are questions unanswered, jokes unsaid, Quackity unteased. It breaks your heart, but it must be done. You look into the camera, all vulnerable and devout, as if to say: I’m doing this for you, all for you.

pack it up yandere simulator

idk whats going on but i think im into it?

villain arc villain arc villain aRC VILLAIN ARC

“Hey, guys,” Corpse’s voices rings in your headphones, and not a blink later his astronaut appears in the lobby in a cloud of smoke, “Hi, Y/n.”

More sharp, excited hellos follow after. You merely hum, though give no further reply. As Corpse strays to your side, Charlie steps in in front of him, “BDA access only. You have a permit, bitch?”

“Y/n is being quiet-she’s being quiet, guys!” Quackity helpfully informs, as if the rest failed to notice your cryptic silence, “Don’t be sad Corpse, man, Corpse don’t be-she didn’t say shit to me either.”

“Y/n has decided to not waste her breath on the SDS.” Charlie voices, “And you know what? I actually agree with her for once.”

“SD-what now?” Dream questions.

“The Small Dick Society.” Charlie explains, noting Dream’s whine of protest, “Oh no, don’t give me that shit, weren’t you bitching about not being invited and not belonging to exclusive clubs? Congratulations, you’re finally part of one.”

“Wait!” Quackity interjects, “Am I part of it too?”

“Guess, Sherlock.”

“I’ll drink to that.” Corpse says. You nod to your audience, like he just spoke the God honest truth, and follow in his example. Your tentative sip unexpectedly turns into a greedy gulp, but you’re not complaining. The only slightly coherent thought that rings in your mind is drink tasty.

“Ignore them,” Rae chimes, “Y/n’s probably plotting something and using Charlie as a cover up.”

“I’d never.” The words slip past your lips before you can stop them.

“Well you sure are very quick to deny it.” You can hear her smirking, can hear the proud lilt in her voice, like she caught onto your silly little scheme, like she has you all figured out. Your eyes narrow dangerously. The night behind your window pools dark, with far away city lights glimmering before they, too, seem to dim.

Your roommate is back on your shitlist. How her name was missed among the rest.

“I’m defending my honor.” You yelp, the playfulness back in your voice along with your sunny smile, “I can’t have my wifey slandering me online. At least do it in private, geez.”

If Rae’s such a good detective, you’ll give her a good chase. Perhaps you’ve been laying it on too thick. Made her too suspicious. She can’t out you yet--not when your plans are so grand, so fun. It would be a waste.

“Why weren’t you saying anything then?” Quackity questions.

“Do I need a reason not wanting to talk to you?” You shoot back. Your friends laugh and he tries to shriek something past their cackle. You lean back into your chair, the tension from Rae’s confrontation finally easing. You wink at the camera and bring a finger to your lips. The roaches swear to secrecy, elated by your wickedness. As appropriate, they spam devil emojis and various renditions of evil hohohos and hehehes. The apple truly does not fall far from the tree. You had raised them well. You raise your glass in solidarity. A few donations fall into your pocket, easily summed up as: make them suffer.

Muting the discord call, you give a single response, “Oh, I intend to.”

i hope this doesn’t awaken something in me

^already too late for me bro

As caught up in wreaking havoc among your viewers as you are, you miss Sykkuno’s entrance, though from what you can tell, Charlie gave a stern warning to back the fuck off to him, too. He’s playing into your plan so beautifully. Truly, you couldn’t do this without him. Back to stalking the chat you go.

Your eyes flicker to the game upon Bretman’s signature drawl and “Hi, daddy.”. You have no time to get offended at Corpse’s sweet “Hi, honey” back, because the next person to join the discord call and the lobby leaves you speechless. You knew, of course, you had been informed of the line-up, but still, you had never expected yourself to be so close to Jomes Chorles himself. You make a weird gesture with your hands, half wave half excited wiggle, as if you’re telling the audience to calm down, when, in fact, it is you that needs calming.

He goes saying his hello’s like doing a public service, name by name, before, lastly, uttering, “Hi, Miss Y/n. Loooove the vids.”

He’s a roach in disguise, who could’ve known?! Your audience is so diverse and unexpected, gosh, you’d shed a tear if the mascara wasn’t so expensive.

“Hi!” You reply with a grin, and it’s genuine this time, a glimmer of your old self, “Hi, I love your videos, too. It’s like, really cool to finally meet you.”

“Oh my God, you too!” Is his enthusiastic reply, “Okay, the energy in the studio today? Love it.”

“Is this all of us?” Quackity asks.

“Sadly.” James says with a note of disappointment.

“HEY!”

“Okay, guys!” Ash chimes, “Let’s do this! Proximity Among Us, round one, go go go!”

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Luck does not shine upon you during the first round- you are stuck as Crew Mate, your life cut short by Bretman who had the audacity to bite your head off. You’re positive Ke$ha wrote her hit single Cannibal about him, and if she didn’t, she definitely had a That’s So Raven moment and predicted it. It’s also insanely suspicious as after you are eliminated he sticks real close to Corpse, feigning innocence (and this is a controversial opinion you do not endorse) better than even you. It wounds your pride, having been picked off so casually, so quickly, and now stuck a ghost you roam the halls of the dying spaceship, lost, confused, heartbroken.

Charlie runs past you, not once even glancing in your direction. “Brother...” You mutter sadly, “Do you not see me here? Do you not feel... the loss of your twin’s heartbeat...?" Damn, these mimosas really are making you emotional. You sniffle and take a sip to calm the storm within you. No rage, just sadness. You are still processing your own tragic demise.

Suddenly, a meeting is called. There’s a horrible red X on your astronaut. You are the only one dead so far, and of course the rest won’t vote out the fucker. How bitterly you sit! With your arms crossed over your chest and your glare sharp enough to cut through glass. Fuck the sad shit, now you’re just angry. At the very least, the second Impostor could’ve given you some company!

“I knew something felt off.” Charlie is first to speak.

“Who the fuck killed Y/n?” Corpse questions, and his voice ignites a whole discussion that lasts much too short. The others skip, having no suspect yet. It’s much too soon to start pointing fingers, but you still feel like they should have at least tried. Pouting, you fix yourself another drink.

“Stop drinking!?” You gasp, exasperated at your chats demands, “I’m dead! What else should I do, the tasks?! Nah, fuck that. I’m done. I’m out. Charlie better employ his fucking detective skills because if the Impostors win, I will literally quit the game--yes I will, no I’m not bullshitting, fucking watch me.”

Thankfully, Bretman was caught venting, and you didn’t have to end the stream prematurely. The second Impostor, your roommate (oh, the betrayal, Rae, how could you?!) was voted out due to Corpse’s suspicion. Victory to the Crew Mates! The game restarts and you find yourself back in the lobby.

“Miss Y/n,” Bretman says, “I am sooo sorry for killing you first, baby. It was just too easy. I couldn’t pass it up.”

Giggling, Quackity chimes, “Sister slaughtered.”

“Oh my God,” James groans, “shut up!”

“Yeah, Y/n.” Charlie speaks, and there’s an accusatory note in his calm voice, “Why the fuck did you allow yourself to be eliminated first? Real noob shit, I expected more of you.”

“HUH?!” You frown, “What’s with the victim blaming?! I literally was doing my task and Bretman snuck up on me. It’s not like I had a weapon to defend myself!”

“You have been avenged,” Corpse states, “and that’s all that matters.”

“Thank you, Corpse!” You say, “At least someone cares.”

“Hey, I helped, too!” Dream pipes up.

“No, you didn’t.” Corpse shoots him down, “I was the only one.”

“You were not--”

“Literally was. Isn’t that right, Sykkuno?”

“Uhhhh-” Sykkuno trails off, “Well, we-we all helped!” You can hear his shy smile, and you just know he’s bobbing his head up and down at this exact moment, “We all helped. Team work!”

“Team work!” The rest echo, save for yourself, Corpse, Charlie, and the two Impostors. Silence speaks more than a thousand words or whatever. You pray to any higher power willing to listen to finally assign you the role of the villain, the one you were born to do.

Sadly, higher powers must have either shitty customer service or are in need of hearing aids, and you almost scream in frustration when your astronaut appears along with the others, the bold CREW MATE title chipping away at your master plan.

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“Hey, Y/n, hey! Hey, Y/n!” Rae finds you in Cafeteria, where you, metaphorically, are eating your feelings. Not that she needs to know, of course. She sounds chipper, a bit ditsy, and that must mean she’s sufficiently tipsy. You store that information for later, and forget about it as soon as you notice Dream and Sykkuno, like her very own personal bodyguards, trailing after her, “Wanna play a game?!”

“Is this Saw?” You inquire, somewhat lazy. You’d be lying if you said the alcohol wasn’t affecting you, it’s just instead of making you bubbly, it makes you mellow. This was supposed to be fun, you were supposed to terrorize everyone and laugh as they perished by your hand, yet here you are, wallowing in self-pity. The roaches start worrying. The donation jingle chimes.

BEATINGS & SLUTATIONS yns_fishnets donated 5$ mom just wait it out & dont worry youll get your vengeance soon lead them on!!!!

Your fishnets have a point!

“Saw?--No, no, haa, no it’s a drinking game.” Dream sounds like he has had one too many rounds of this mysterious game, and naturally, you are intrigued.

“Where we drink!” Sykkuno clarifies. Right, well that explains everything! If you had any questions, you surely have none now.

“Okay, so, name a category, and you have to, like, say a word associated with it...Or something along those lines.” You hadn’t even agreed and Rae is explaining the rules already. She knows you too well. It’s both a blessing and a curse, “Can be anything! Okay, Y/n, Y/n, Y/n start!”

“Uhh--” If only your brain computed as fast as she spoke! “Song lyrics! Wait--who drinks?”

“You fail, you drink!” She hurries, “Choke me like you hate me but you love meeeeee. Syk, go, go go!”

“Uhm, ah, I don’t wanna feel like this, uh, fuck?” He laughs--it’s a raspy, embarrassed little sound, “I don’t...wanna look like this? Dream, now you!”

“Wait, we’re singing Corpse’s songs?”

“Any song!” You urge him quickly, “Hurry! Or drink!”

“She say I kill her cat like I'm Luka Magnotta--”

“Hey! That’s cheating! You can’t use my song!” Rae protest.

“That wasn’t in the rules!” He counters.

“Y/n! Time’s running out!” Sykkuno exclaims.

“Oh, uh, will-will the real Slim Shady please stand up!”

NOT EMINEM WHAT THE FUCK

MOOOM WHT THE HELL THIS ISNT 2008 T_T

“Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia’s greatest love machine--”

“All...All the other kids with the pumped up kicks better, uhh, run better run, faster...-faster than my gun?”

“Uhh, shit--fucking hell.” Dream laughs, and Rae practically screams at him to keep going, “Alright! Okay! I’m singing--uh, you’re so golden, na na na na?”

“I tell you what a woman loves most,” You chime gleefully, “it’s a man who can slap but can also stroke.”

finally, the mother mother representation we’ve all been waiting for

i aint exactly gay but i aint exactly not gay >:)

the bis won

“I steal a few breeeeaaaths from the woooorld for a minute--”

“Mitski?!” You question, eyes bulging, “Baby, who hurt you?”

Even if you can’t see her, you know she’s waving her arms around and shaking her head, “Not the point! Sykkuno!”

“Uh, I-I, uhm, I don’t--”

“Drinnnnk!” You all chorus.

“It was a good concert,” You say, “Syk, I’ll drink with you.”

“Thank you, Y/n. That’s very kind of you.” He says softly, with a smile lining his lips. You grin.

“Oh, fine. Everyone, bottoms up!” Rae decides, and no one protest. A moment of silence passes, then, “Well, GG, GG, let’s do some tasks?”

Your enthusiastic Ariana Grande-esque “yuh” is cut short by the second meeting of game two being called. The first one to go had been Ash, voted out during a bathroom break as a joke, and you still feel a bit bad about that. Now, you notice Charlie has been eliminated. A sense of righteousness fills you--while you mourn for your brother from another mother and father and family tree, you feel like this is divine punishment for slandering you before the start of this round. Karma. Nothing much is discussed, and the meeting ends shortly with everyone skipping.

You spend a good ten minutes wandering around with Dream, who’s mission appears to be convincing you to join his Minecraft server, and really, there was no need for him to try so hard. You failed to provide him with a concrete answer only because it would've been to humiliating to admit that you agreed instantly upon hearing the word Minecraft.

That’s when things get fucking weird. Another meeting is called whilst you’re in the middle of fixing lights, and once the board with the members appears you audibly gasp. There had been 8 living, breathing astronauts rushing around the map, and now only 4 remain. You, Corpse, James, and Alex.

“What the fuck--what the fuck?!” You screech alarmed, noting Dream being among the perished crew, “I was just with Dream fixing the lights, I was just with him, what the fuck--”

“Okay, no one panic.” James says, “Let’s figure this out. Okay? Okay. Who else is close to Electrical?”

“I’m at Nav.” Quackity says.

“I’m at Cafeteria, but Y/n--” Corpse starts, “kinda weird that Dream died when you were with him?”

“I didn’t fucking kill him, I swear to God, Corpse, why are you accusing me?”

“Don’t be so defensive.” He says smoothly, “I’m just pointing out the obvious. We all have a reason to be sus, no? Considering you were right with him.”

“...It is suspicious.” James agrees, and a part of you dies inside. You understand their hesitance to trust you, but it doesn’t make it any less frustrating!

“Guys, I didn’t kill him, I swear. He invited me to play Minecraft, I wouldn’t do that to him, not after that!”

Corpse merely hums, and it brings no comfort what’s so ever. The situation is spiraling, and not in your favor. Trying to salvage your chances at freedom, you try again, “Wh-James, James, you called the meeting, right?”

“Yeah, I found Rae’s body near Medical.”

“So I couldn’t have killed her and Dream at the same time!” You latch onto that piece of information, hoping it will save you.

“You could’ve vented.” Corpse points out, “Plus, there’s no telling how old the body is.”

“Killing five fucking people? It’s the work of one person, or else the game would have already ended. As it stands, I am no way sober enough to think all of this out.”

A brief silence hangs in the air; your lungs constrict from tension, from spilling words so hotly. You grasp your glass, as if for emphasis, and take a shy sip. It taste sweet, a bit too sweet for your liking. Must be your nerves. You drink again to wash the taste out of your mouth, which, surprisingly, doesn’t work. You whine a little, stomping your feet like a child about to throw a temper tantrum.

“...I believe her.” Quackity says. You breathe out a sigh of relief.

“Alex, thank youuuuuu!” You gush, batting your lashes as if he could somehow see you and that would somehow portray your innocence, “I knew I liked you for a reason!”

He mutes his mic, his spill of words lost to your ears, but chat helpfully informs that he’s screaming because you don’t hate him.

y/n out here collecting men like pokemon cards

Now all that’s left is to convince the others. You start with the one you know will work, “Corpse,” You address him in your sweetest voice.

“Y/n,” James warns, “don’t you dare--”

“Baby, I didn’t kill anyone, I’m crew mate, you gotta believe me.”

“She's innocent.” Corpse declare, thoroughly convinced.

“Oh my fucking God, you fucking simp!” James laughs, “She’s obviously manipulating you!”

“No, no, she isn’t. She’s innocent, I agree with Quackity. Now, it’s either you or him.”

“Could be you for all we know!” Alex accuses.

“Guys, time’s running out.” You mutter fretfully, noting the seconds tick by from white to red.

“I’m voting Alex.” Corpse says.

“What?! Fucking traitor! Fine, I’m voting for you.” Alex hisses.

“Ugh, hate agreeing with Quackity, but I’m also voting Corpse. Sorry, hon, nothing personal.” James says. The VOTED icons pop up beside their characters and you panic, pressing your mouse idly but it’s too late, there wasn’t enough time, and you cry as Corpse is thrown into lava. The chat spams F, and it feels like salt on a fresh wound.

In a second you’re back in Cafeteria, shell-shocked and trembling, and Quackity cusses because the Impostor is still among you. His frustration doesn’t last long as you watch in horror as Jams Chortles, beauty guru supreme, murders the only other crew mate in cold blood and all you can do is gape and let his cheerful laughter fill your ears. The screen bleeds red, informing of Impostor victory, the second one being Ash. Looks like you voted her off for the right reason, but little difference did it make.

“Corpse!” You yell past the cacophony of voices, all in varying forms of excitement or anger, beelining for his in-game figure, “Corpse, I’m so sorry, I panicked, I tried pressing the button but I wasn’t quick enough--”

“It’s alright, baby. Don’t worry about it.” He’s so calming, so gentle, you might burst into tears again. What did you do to deserve him? You wish he was with you so you could smother him in a hug. Alas, all you can do now is say “I kith you, mwah!” and rush to the other side of the lobby, as if to hide from such a bold display of affection, even if it was a joke (it wasn’t).

yall say corpse simps for y/n but the reality is y/n simps for corpse harder

queen stop its embarrassing

bhaddies can simp!! i wouldnt but its her choice <3

More deliberations, commentary, and short breaks. Once everyone has returned, the countdown starts. You’re still reeling from the chaos of emotions, the five stages of grief you experienced in 1 second upon Corpse’s unjust demise, that it takes you a moment, a single heartbeat to realize what you’re seeing on screen.

The letters IMPOSTOR hang above your astronaut, with Dream standing just behind you as your newly appointed partner in crime. And suddenly, all the sadness and the tenderness and sympathy vanish with a curt exhale. You slowly turn your head to the chat, muting the Discord call, your soft chuckle of disbelief turning into a full blown laugh.

it’s happening!!!!

omg omg omg omg

VILLAIN ARC VILLAIN ARC VILLAIN ARC

You slap your palm over your lips, trying to contain your wicked smile, to tone down your broken giggles, “N-No, I can’t laugh yet,” shaking your head softly, you look into the camera, “they’re all going to die.”

pack it up light yagami

this has awoken something in me.

^ same

The crew mates go their own ways, rushing to do their tasks like the diligent little workers they are. How adorable. Their grim fate is still miles away from them. The shit you’ll pull will be for the history books. Much like your outfit, which you picked keeping in mind your newfound thirst for blood, you had devised your plan of action with care and consideration. You had been mulling it over all day, drawing on paper like the absolute madwoman you are; hell, you even made sticky notes on who to go for first and what to say. Sure, being moderately drunk hinders your memory slightly (an understatement of the century), but you got a feel for what you’re going to do. It’s nothing short of evil.

Dream and you don’t exchange words, you merely nod at him-- which he, of course, can’t see-- but your criminal bond enables telepathic communication. You can hear his thoughts, ones that strangely sound like drink drink, drink drink. And really, who are you to refuse such an enticing offer?! As he fucks off to stalk his victims, or play pretend, you take a sip. The cocktail is still sweet, but this time it’s not the icky sweet you had tasted prior. You glance at your sticky notes, ones the roaches can’t see, and nearly spill your drink for the second time today as you jerk.

“Fuck!” You exclaim, shoving your headphones off and spinning in your chair. You hastily stand up, wobble -- the world is pleasantly funny right about now -- and giggle. Stepping past the mountains of abandoned clothes and pillows and blankets and anime plushies, you maneuver your way to your bedside table and yank it open, nearly taking out the whole drawer with you. In the mess of old diaries and bad drawings, pencils, jewelry, and stickers, you fish out something you should not be wielding in your inebriated state.

It’s a knife.

In midst of teenage angst you had ordered it off of Amazon with your mom’s credit card, all the while whining that it’s not a phase, mom, and it’s what all of my cool kid friends with fried hair have, and don’t you want me to fit in, don’t you want your daughter to be happy?! You think it’s about that time, the time of too much uneven eyeliner and black eye shadow, that she took to calling you little raccoon. Trash rabbit was your personal favorite, but she used it sparingly. When you presented your Macy’s outfit, holding up a fucking butterfly knife, to your dad, asking if it was a look, he glanced up from some boring business magazine all boring business dads read and said, with a bright smile might you add, “It’s a something!”.

Oh, how it gleams in the lilac light. You used to do tricks with it, back in eight grade maybe, and--what the fuck? Why did you parents allow you to buy it in the first place? Well, because you’re the only child, the only one important, of course they got it for you and clapped enthusiastically at your performances, because why wouldn’t they? The whining they’d face otherwise would’ve been harder to endure than a whole dance number to Panic! At The Disco’s greatest hits. Broadway looked so fucking shabby in comparison. Your mom said so, so it must be true.

Stumbling back to your extremely confused viewers, you take your seat, feeling a bit more grounded now that you’re not standing on your platform shoes anymore. Putting on your headphones, you grin at the chat that starts swimming, and not from too much drinking either. You do a quick flick of your wrist, one that thankfully doesn’t end in injury, and the sharp tip of the exposed knife points upwards, glimmering. It’s a rainbow colored one, because one, it’s pretty, and two, you weren’t hardcore enough for the jet-black or straight up military ones the other emo kids had. Cute and dangerous, just like you.

So you just sit there, holding it up, looking somewhat sly as the roaches capture this momentous moment with screen-caps. Someone definitely clipped you trudging past the obstacle course to obtain a weapon of mass destruction. You must be already trending on Twitter, though you can’t exactly log on and confirm your suspicions. You just feel like you might be, like you should be, because your audience wouldn’t let this slide. Thankfully, your friends don’t have time to check social media, or you’d be outed in an instant.

“Y/n?” Your roommates voice booms from your headphones, and you perk up with a stupid realization that you completely forgot about Among Us. Stuck at the start, at the lobby where Dream had left you, you see her astronaut waddling to you, “What are you doing here? Wait--Have you not moved from the beginning?” She can barely finish the sentence without giggling.

You grin, “I was looking for something.”

Your voice is soft, too calm for your usual frantic spill. You gently set the knife down, hand coming to rest on your mouse, fingers idly, slowly, bouncing on the buttons.

“...What were you looking for?” She’s none the wiser, the numerous drinks consumed tonight numbing her sharp mind. She would have noticed. Your eerie composure would’ve given it away in a heartbeat, or at least hinted at something being objectively wrong. But she sounds curious. Poor girl, hasn’t she heard? Curiosity killed the cat.

“A knife.”

“A knife?!” There’s something about her tone that implies a mental clicking, the puzzle pieces falling together, “You have a knife?!”

“Yes.”

“No!”

You think it would only be appropriate that the random sequence of killing animations renders the backstabbing one. You grin, biting your lower lip with a quiet snicker.

i love women

if evil bad...why seggy?

You take your time leaving her there -- in true serial-killer-to-be fashion, you stick around for a bit longer, admiring your handiwork, or more like the chat singing your praises. You joined today with the intent of making an interesting stream. You have no doubt in your mind that now it will be legendary.

You move down the hallway, and you let your imagination wander: you can almost feel the stuffy air of your helmet, can almost hear your loud footsteps echoing in all this hush, can almost see your reflection in the spotless tile floor. It’s not long before your second victim makes an appearance, running circles in Cafeteria. You hear his voice first before you see him, recognizing Alex by his unhinged screech of “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s goooo!”

“And what’s got you so excited?” How cool and collected you are, gosh, you barely contain the quiver of excitement that threatens to slip out.

“Y/n!” He exclaims, rushing to your side like a lost puppy--he’s really making this easy for you, he’s not even trying, “You just missed--Oh my fucking God, you just missed James, he-he called me tall, he called me fucking tall! Let’s go, let’s gooooo!”

“Well, you are tall, aren’t you?” You chime sweetly, almost as sweet as the drink that lingers on the tip of your tongue, “Real 6′3 energy, no?”

“Yes, yes, exactly! You get it, you fucking get it--” Once again, his mic goes mute, and you glance at the chat for help.

hard to transcribe what hes saying but hes taking shots and yelling that he loves you good job mom

hey, queen! girl, you have done it again, constantly raising the bar for us all and doing it flawlessly

mom plz dont kill alex hes too cute hes all uwu rn

Oh, how you’re about to break his poor little heart. If you had any good left in you, you’d spare him. You don’t, and you’re not taking requests at the moment, so all you do is smile at your chat and they know. They just do. Hive-mind shit, you’re all two-faced little fuckers.

You giggle, and it sounds a tad fake, “You’re so weird, Alex,” You start, and he’s back in the call, a sound of confusion echoing in your ears, “but I get it, you know. You’re weird. You’re a weirdo. You don’t fit it, and you don’t want to fit in. I mean, really, has anyone even seen you without your stupid hat?”

“...Do--” He sputters, bellowing a laugh, “Do you have that whole fucking monologue memorized?!”

“Is it because you’re bald?”

“I’m not fucking bald!” His giddiness is quickly replaced by anger.

You hum, pretend to think, lastly barking a “Liar.” before you kill him. His scream is cut off, leaving only deafening silence at it’s wake. Unlike with Rae, you don’t stick around. You didn’t appreciate how little he enjoyed your recital.

You run into James near Navigation, most likely on his way to Cafeteria. He ends his song mid-note, and you breathe a sigh of relief, “Finally! Someone! I’ve been looking all over, where the hell is everyone?” You question, blocking his way, lest he accidentally stumbles onto the crime scene and easily pins it on you. You’re not done yet.

“Honestly? No clue. I’m searching for them myself, like, everyone’s scattered. I hope no one died.”

You smile. You tried not to, but you can’t contain it, “Me, too.” You echo the sentiment, urging him to join you, and he does. Too trusting. Everyone in this game is too fucking trusting. You lead him back to Nav, feigning that you have a task here. As you pretend to move the spaceship, you can’t help but ask, “Hey, James?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s your favorite scary movie?”

A beat of silence passes, “Oh no, fuck that, I don’t like this at all.” He states, about to spin on his heel and bolt like he should do, but you’re quicker-- killer instincts and all-- and he’s dead before he makes it out the doorway.

“See, after your No More Lies video, I figured you’d only tell the truth.” Yes, this is the part of the anime where the villain monologues, only the hero in this case is an astronaut cut in half, and not exactly alive to listen to you. You hope James’ ghost sticks around, “Case in point, why the fuck did you tell Quackity he’s tall?” You eye the chat, which’s mostly spamming W and comparing you to Ryo from Devilman Crybaby. “Such a shame...” You murmur, pressing the REPORT button.

“What?! How are so many people dead?!” Ash gasps, her kind voice tinted with fear and confusion. Your three kills, like military stars on an uniform of a distinguished officer, are displayed on the board. Dream appears to be slacking, having yet to take a life.

“Someone’s been real fucking busy.” Charlie observes. It’s true, you have been.

“I found James in Nav, but holy shit--” You begin, exasperated, “--what the fuck, guys, how did we miss this shit? Where is everyone?”

“I’m at Electrical.” Corpse voices.

“And I’m with Corpse.” One sentence is all it takes to figure out your next target: Bretman. Revenge for being killed first in the first goddamn round, and for spending so much time with your boyfriend.

Eep!!! Boyfriend boyfriend boyfriend!!! The word even makes you forget your thirst for blood, that’s how whipped you are. Sadly, it’s time to return to reality, to this grave situation.

“And what have the two of you been conspiring?” You keep your tone level, but that alone is enough to set everyone off. The unease you had planted within them before the game started is starting to bloom. However, if they suspect you, they don’t speak up, not yet.

“Fishnets, mostly.” Corpse says.

only partly a lie he was mostly talking abt u queen <3

corpse simping for y/n is the sweetest thing ever

the times corpse used y/ns name when talking abt y/n: 1. the times he used baby or my baby: infinite

“I’m wearing them right nyoooow.” Bretman drawls.

You hum, “What a coincidence. I am, too.”

“Wait--For real?” That seems to catch Corpse’s attention, because of course it does, you picked them with him in mind, after all.

“No peeping.” You tsk, obviously referring to his tendency to hop onto your stream unprompted. Whether he actually listens to your demands is beyond you, “Peeping means cheating.”

“For the love of fuck all, can we get back to the three dead bodies, please? Because I’m about to have a second coming of Christ moment and taste my consumed, digested beer for the second time.” Charlie interjects.

“I mean, anyone have any ideas who’d do this?” Dream takes hold of the conversation. Quiet, disappointed nos greet him. They have nothing to go on, no clues, not even a subliminal message. With everyone scattered, there is no way of locating the actual bodies and drawing a long red trail leading back to you.

You’re too good at lying, and Dream is too good of a publicist. People tend to trust his judgement, which is his main asset (besides his calm demeanor of course). When the Among Us gods chose you as Impostor, they made sure you had every advantage.

“Who-Who do you think it is, Dream?” Ash questions, “I trust you. I do. Just know that.”

“No fucking clue.”

“Y/n?” She tries again.

“Same. I’m a bit worried, though.”

“Let’s, uhhh, let’s skip?” Sykkuno offers. The consensus is to start voting at six. Your new mission is to make sure you dwindle the numbers down drastically before that can happen. You have no qualms about sacrificing Dream in order to meet your goals, either. Absolutely cold blooded.

Back at Cafeteria, there are words exchanged about Quackity’s body just laying there, forgotten. Blame is shifted: how come we didn’t notice sooner? Where’s Rae? And you mindlessly go along with their mourning, not really paying attention. Dream leaves with Charlie and Sykkuno, Corpse requests you stay with him and you sprout fake apologies. Not his time yet. Us girls need to stick together!, you sing, following after Ashley and getting further and further away from him, going deeper and deeper into the labyrinth of the spaceship.

You find yourself in Security with her, her cute astronaut pressed to the cameras, watching the live feed, “Let’s lurk here, okay? Maybe we’ll see something.” If only she saw who was standing behind her.

“Who do you think is the Impostor?” You ask, standing in the doorway, “Or, more like, who are the Impostors?”

“Honestly?” She ends her word with a little sigh, “I think it might be Corpse and Bretman. I haven’t seen them at all this game.”

You smile, raising your brows, tilting your heard, and you sound so kind, like a dear old friend about to deliver a tender message, “...Have you seen me?”

“SHIT!”

Too late. In one smooth motion she joins the afterlife. You cut the lights, venting mindlessly till you spot Corpse and Bretman panicking in Weapons. Your existence is still a mystery to them.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck--” Corpse mumbles, “Bretman, don’t you dare fucking kill me right now.”

“I’m not Impostor!”

“Okay, I’ll drink to that.”

They rush out of Weapons, most likely on their way to Electrical, and you trail after them like the Grim Reaper itself, biding your time till you can deliver the killing blow.

“Corpse?!” You call out, mild panic ringing in your voice, “Is that you?”

“Shit, Y/n? Where are you?” He questions. Crew vision is so sad, so small, how can he not see you standing almost right next to him? “Where’s Ash?”

“I dunno,” You say, “when the lights went out I ran. Please don’t kill me.”

“I’d never do that, baby.”

Too easy. They’re all too fucking easy. You bite your lower lip, trying to stop the laugh bubbling in your chest, to stop the lightheaded dizziness that overcomes you with a rush of excitement.

“Thanks, pretty boy.” You mutter, and it sounds a bit lower than you intended, a bit darker, something sinister lurking underneath cotton candy words. It instantly clicks in Bretman and he makes a noise, something like a whine, and you see him backing away, “I know I can always trust you.”

Whether Corpse notices the odd shift in tone, he doesn’t show it, “I like it when you call me that.” Is all he says, and you hear the smile in his voice, the appreciation. The trek to Electrical is all but forgotten. You slowly make your way to Bretman, “Where are you? Come here.”

“Just a minute,” You say cheerily, “I just need to kill Bret first.”

“Holy shit.”

“N-” Your victim’s sentence is cut off in a second, and you can’t contain your manic cackle this time, because the screen bleeds red, the words VICTORY splattered on it, depicting yours and Dream’s sneaky astronauts. You’re still laughing as the voices of your fallen friends ring in your ears.

“Y/n, what the fuck, you’re an actual monster.” Dream says, but there’s no actual weight behind his words, each syllable punctured with a laugh.

“I knew the second she asked me about my favorite scary movie that I’d get the chop.” James states.

“Wait, Y/n, did you kill everyone?” Corpse questions.

“She fucking did!” Dream answers for you, “I got Charlie and Sykkuno, and barely at that. What the fuck.”

“I’ve been waiting so fucking long for this.” You admit, giggling, raising you glass, “I toast to you, Dream. My perfect partner in crime.”

“I didn’t really do shit, but cheers.”

Quackity heaves a heavy sigh, “Y/n, Y/n, you don’t actually think I’m weird, right? Right?”

“No, she does.” James chimes.

“WHAT THE FUCK DID I EVER DO TO YOU, DUDE?!”

More commotion, more noise, and you just sit there, buzzed, snickering, reading the chat as the rest agree to play another round. You thank the people who donated that you had accidentally missed among the, you know, murder, reply to a few questions, bow dramatically to the many praises and invisible flowers you receive for such beautiful assassin work. When you look back at the screen, you throw your head back with a maniacal laugh.

Impostor again, only this time it’s with Charlie. Family bonds are often restored when united under a common goal. You’re so happy. So happy. You weren’t done terrorizing your friends yet.

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @bingusmode - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

#corpse husband #corpse #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #corpse social media au #corpse husband x y/n #corpse husband fic #corpse husband social media au #social media au #myso #make you say oh #quackity #dream smp #corpse x y/n #imagine #imagines #reader #xreader

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peachy-hk · 4 years

Note

Hikaru and Tamaki angst(seperate) where reader watches them fall for Haruhi and they know the boys would never love them cuz they're nothing like her. After moping they move on and fall for someone new and confess. Too bad the boys notice this and realize they love reader not Haruhi. Reader realizes they're trying to doom their relationship with this new person and just blow up on the boys saying they're finally happy and they're ruing it. Boys watch reader be happy without them. Angst ending.

does this count as unrequited love? idk somebody tell me. I cut them a little short so I could fit Hikaru and Tamaki in one post. Tbh i kinda went off track from the request but i really like how they turned out!

moving on - Tamaki x Reader, Hikaru x reader (separate)

Warnings: fem reader!

Word count: 870

A/N: I’m sorry it took me so long to respond omg, school started again but I finally got time!!

Hikaru

There are two reasons you never confessed your feelings towards Hikaru Hitachiin.

One, you didn’t want to have the twins try to pull a switch on you.

Two, he loved Haruhi Fujioka.

It was clear from the second that you met the host club that he had feelings for her. Yet it didn’t stop you from having your own feelings for the boy.

The four of you were in the same class. This was by far the best and worst part of having feelings for him. It meant you could spend hours with him everyday. But, it also meant you had to watch how he looked at Haruhi completely different than he did at you.

How could you possibly compete with her?

you can’t.

it’s at 12 am one night when you suddenly realize that moping around hoping that Hikaru would give you his affection for even a second will never happen.

Crying at night, longing for his touch and attention won’t change anything.

You make up your mind that night.

You’re moving on.

It’s a lot easier said than done.

feelings don’t work in a way where if you chose to disregard them, the will disappear.

your heart still cracks a little every time you see him look longingly at her. You still wish he was looking at you. But he isn’t, and the sooner you get that thought into your head, the better.

they eat together, they do their work together, they spend their breaks together. They do everything thing you wish you could do with him.

there’s a thought in your mind. A small itching thought. That the two might just be dating. You’re moving on but you still don’t want it to be true. It would make sense though right? If they’re dating it would explain why they act so much like a couple. A seed is planted in your head that day. They’re dating.

Does your heart shatter at the thought? Yes.

Did it help you get over him? Also yes.

Months pass and you’re now in a loving relationship with none other than Takashi Morinozuka. Haruhi and Hikaru have been publicly dating since the start of your relationship.

You don’t remember the last time Hikaru had tried to talk to you outside of class, and to be quite frank, you didn’t care either. So when he tries to talk to you at lunch, when the classroom is empty, your thoughts are running wild.

“Can we talk?”

“...”

“why don’t you like me anymore?”

“Why do you care? We’re both in separate relationships.”

“I think, I’m in love with you. Not Haruhi.”

“It’s a little too late for that. I’m happy with Mori.”

you leave the classroom. If you stayed both of you would spiral. You’re happy with Mori, he needs to know that you’ve moved on. He is no longer the one in your eyes or in your heart.

Tamaki

“When we’re older, lets get married!”

He said this to you when you we’re both children. No worries in the world, running around you the school rose garden. At the time it didn’t stick to you. You didn’t even have the slightest idea of what marriage was. But you agreed anyway.

“Remember, you can’t date anybody!! We’re getting married when we’re older!”

Elementary school, recess. The same day a boy in your class had confessed his feelings to you. You felt horrible for leaving the boy like that. But Tamaki had dragged you away to remind you of your childhood promise.

“Come to the dance with me! We can steal the spotlight as if we’re practising for our future wedding!”

Middle school, lunch time. The tickets to the school’s next dance are being sold. Tamaki makes sure you’re the person he goes with.

You’ve always known that he never meant it. How could somebody so easily stick by something they said as a child? There’s no way he actually thought the two of you would get married right?

You think it’s a joke. You want it to be a joke. Until the day comes when he and Haruhi start dating. You wish you could take it all back. Take his words seriously.

They dance together in the middle of the dance floor. Fingers intertwined, bodies pressed close. They look so elegant, so graceful. All you can think about, is how much you wish you were her in that moment.

Kyoya taps your shoulder and offers his hand. No words need to be exchanged as you place your hand in his and he guides the two of you to the rose garden.

“I thought you’d like a break from the crowded inside. Get some air, dance in the moonlight.”

“You always seem to know just what I need.”

Your hands intertwine with his as the two of you dance to the music that is still audible from the ballroom. You rest your head on his shoulder, taking in the scent of whatever expensive cologne he’s got on. Your eyes meet, as your bodies inch closer together.

Tamaki Suoh feels his heart break in his chest, as he watches his best friend and first love kiss in the garden where everything began.

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sugarmaplewings-fics · 4 years

Text

First Kiss

Pairing: BNHA Boys x reader

Warnings: The safety of your uwu's. We got stuff from me writing at 3 AM, which is basically Sugar Sap Hours TM, so be warned. Also if you don't like kissing. Idk why you would keep reading if you didn't, but yeah there's some detail.

This is what I mean when I say that I am little more than a hopeless romantic.

If this is bad then that's because the last time I kissed someone was when I was six years old.

Enjoy!

-Sugar

.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇

Characters: Midoriya, Bakugou, Todoroki, Kirishima

Midoriya:

● Boy was so nervous

● Truth be told, he'd wanted to kiss you long before you started dating, but he never knew how to ask

● It had been a month or so into the relationship, and you'd begun to take notice that the two of you hadn't gone any further than hand holding

● You didn't want to pressure Izuku into something he didn't want to do, neither of you did. It was just that—you longed to feel his lips pressed against yours, and with each passing day the temptation only worsened

● One afternoon, Izuku had just gotten back from his hero training session. You had been watching with the rest of the class as he sparred against Tokoyami. After a hard fight from the both of them, Midoriya had finally come out on top and won against him

● He walked back into the observation room, still panting slightly as he adjusted his protective gloves

● You felt so proud of him. That was your boyfriend and he was a m a z i n g

● Most of the class crowded around and congratulated him as he walked in, and Aizawa sensei even gave him an approving nod

● The glow his eyes had taken on pulled you in, and, before you knew it, what was meant to be a congratulatory hug from you turned into a kiss

● It was quick, your lips barely pushing into each other before you pulled away, but it still had a massive impact

● The whole class (minus the few who had left to get ready for their turn) erupted into cheers and 'OHH!'s

● You both turned bright red and jumped apart, Izuku unable to do anything other than stand glued in place and grin sheepishly

● Once Aizawa had settled everyone down, you pulled your boyfriend towards the back of the room

● "Sorry," you apologized immediately. "I got carried away and—"

● "Why are you sorry?" Izuku asked, suddenly incredulous

● "I just wasn't sure if you were ready—"

● "Do you know how long I've wanted to kiss you?" he cut you off, keeping his voice low so prying ears wouldn't be able to listen in *AHEM, Mina and Kaminari*

● Your face flushed a whole new shade darker. "I may have an idea . . . . I've felt the same way."

● Izuku took your hand in his, rubbing his thumb over the side. "If you want to start now, we can."

● "I'd like that."

● He bit his lip, blushing again as he put a hand on the back of his neck. "We could do some more . . . once class is out."

● Your eyes shone, already giddily anticipating meeting Izuku in his room. "That sounds wonderful."

--------------------

Bakugou:

● It was no secret among the Bakusquad that a certain explosive blond had taken interest in you

● It started with Mina noticing the subtle glances (*stares) he'd throw you, then she enlisted Kirishima to ask him, which only lead to a solid confirmation from Bakugou himself (and Eijirou nearly getting his face blasted off), which then was spread to Sero and Kami

● Within a matter of days, Bakugou's crush on you had simply become common knowledge to the four of them, and now they had to decide on what to do about it

● There was some teasing, of course, in the week that followed; Sero or Kaminari lightly jabbing at him with their elbows when they caught Bakugou absentmindedly watching you

● But Mina wanted more than that, and the others were quick to agree

● One afternoon when classes were over for the day, the quartet were hanging out in the common room. You happened to wander by, looking for something to do and they waved you over excitedly

● They invited you into a game of truth or dare, which they had 100% NOT started just because you walked in

● "Oh, (Y/N), just in time," Sero called out to you. No one other than you missed the way Bakugou shifted in his seat across the room at the sound of your name, back turned to the group

● So as not to seem suspicious, everyone went around a few times, playing their turn

● When everyone's eyes turned toward you for the third time, Denki finally took the opportunity to quietly dare you to go over, kiss Bakugou, and live

● Nothing much, just on the cheek if you could

● You, who were blissfully unaware of Bakugou's feelings towards you, happily accepted, already anticipating seeing the look of pure rage on his face

● You sauntered toward the gremlin boy, who was sitting on a couch across the floor, not paying any attention to the game that was going on mere feet away as he read over one of his notebooks from class

● You leaned over the back of the couch, positioning your face at a perfect angle level with his

● "Hey, Kacchan."

● His head whipped around at the name, giving you perfect access to plant your lips soundly on his cheek for a solid half second before bolting off as fast as you could

● Bakugou just sat there for a second, dumbstruck and trying to process what just happened

● Had that been you? Really you? The (Y/N) who had been stubbornly and oh so agonizingly plaguing his mind for the past two months? Kissing him on the cheek and calling him Kacchan???

● Your speedily retreating form confirmed it for him, plain as day, and he wasted no time in jumping up and vaulting over the couch to chase after you

● Your mind and heart raced in tandem as you finally heard his footsteps slapping after you, running barefoot down the hardwood floored hall

● I'mgonnadie I'mgonnadie I'mgonnadie

● You couldn't help but allow giggles to escape your lips, however, especially when you heard little popping noises behind you, signaling Bakugou was firing off tiny explosions in what you could only assume to be rage

● You began to panic as you realized his legs were longer and he was faster than you. You yelped as searing hands grabbed your shoulders and pressed you against the nearby wall, signaling your defeat

● You were uncertain as to what you should do now, having not thought so far ahead. His hands were now resting firmly on either side of you, caging you in as the both of you lightly panted from the excitement of your short chase

● You defiantly shoved down and silenced the voice in your head that was screaming that he would certainly kill you and spit on your grave, opting to instead grin smugly at his face which had curled into a bit of a snarl

● Oh, how handsome your murderer-to-be was. You couldn't help but finally notice the fact now that you had kissed death, both literally and figuratively

● "So this is how it ends," you said, straining to keep your voice steady and the smile on your face. "If it makes you feel any better, I did it on a dare. Denki's fault."

● Confusion suddenly contorted your face as you watched Katsuki's fall. "That didn't mean anything?"

● You blinked. "Uhh, should it?"

● Katsuki's carmine glare never ceased in its intensity. He harshly bit his lip before removing one of his hands from the wall to drag over his mouth; processing

● You stayed in place, mind racing as to what he might mean. Had he enjoyed it? Did he like the thought of it? Had the Bakugou Katsuki developed . . . feelings for you?

● Of course you knew Katsuki wasn't lacking in the looks department. As you made your rounds assessing all the boys in your class, just like most high school girls do, he most certainly crossed your mind as not bad

● His personality had turned you off a bit, but you knew enough about yourself by now that you were a damned sucker for a bad boy

● His red eyes, which had trailed down to the floor as his mind raced through thoughts of his own only made your face heat

● The way his lips pouted ever so slightly, already enticing you to lean back in for seconds

● No, you told yourself. Begone, thot. Thought? Ha ha. This means nothing, you're just overthinking like you always do.

● You shifted your weight between your feet a few times, trying to physically distract yourself from how close his face was to yours

● Katsuki looked back up at you, disturbed a bit by your antsy squirming

● "What do you want me to do?" you finally asked him, wanting to mull over these intrusive thoughts in the silent privacy of your room. Maybe die in a hole later. You never knew.

● "I want you to do it right this time."

● "What?"

● "If you want to, kiss me like you mean it. If not, you can always go." He kept one arm at his side, open for you to slip away from him if you so chose

● But you didn't want to choose that option. Your head spun, trying to keep up with everything that was going on around you

● It was all so fast, and yet—you loved it

● Shutting down your brain entirely, you grabbed at the back of Katsuki's head and kissed him, full on the lips

● His eyes widened in surprise, having half expected you to slide out from under him and walk away, but no, you were kissing him and it was both everything and nothing like he'd imagined and your lips were so soft and—

● He pushed back into you, fisting your hair in his hands. He was rough and unpracticed, but what he lacked in sweetness he made up for in unapologetic passion

● His teeth knocked against yours and your heart soared in excitement, warmth flooding your body in ways you'd scarcely glimpsed the feeling of

● A sudden cheer brought you both out of your heightened euphoria, Katsuki pulling away and whipping his head around so fast you nearly whimpered at the loss of his lips against yours

● You were just able to see four bodies briskly retreating around the corner, absolutely cackling as Bakugou embarked on his second chase of the day; blushing up a storm and screaming considerably louder at his friends than he had at you

● You brushed the tips of your fingers over your still hot lips, still tingly after what they'd just experienced

● Smirking to yourself, you leaned back against the wall, coming down from your adrenaline high as you attempted to slow your pounding heart back to its normal pace

● He would be back. Boys like him always were. You would talk about your status and becoming official then, but for now, you were content to listen to the echoing explosions sounding off in the other room

--------------------

Todoroki:

● Even after a few months, Shouto was still getting used to the whole idea of 'dating'.

● You were his first s/o, so he wasn't really certain what he was meant to do

● Nevertheless, he tried everything he could think of to be a good boyfriend

● He'd of course noticed that couples kissed, and now that he had you, he wondered if you would like it and what it would feel like

● The two of you were just vibing in your room, doing homework together as you liked to

● Shouto looked up at you to find that you were concentrating on a math equation, nibbling on the end of your pencil

● Your lips suddenly looked so full and soft and enticing, and Shouto couldn't think of anything other than having them pressed against his

● He had been staring at you for quite some time, so you looked up

● "Need something, Sho?" you asked, wondering why he was looking at you like that

● "Can I ask you something?" he asked

● "Sure."

● "Would you mind if we ever . . . kissed?"

● You blinked, taken aback by the completely unexpected question

● "Uhh, like . . . right now?"

● "That would be nice."

● You blushed and smiled. "Sure."

● You moved your notebooks behind you so you could have room to sit close to each other, sliding forward until you were comfortably in front of him

● Shouto felt semi prepared. He had watched exactly five videos and read two articles on this. How hard could it be?

● He touched your cheek, looking into your eyes as he ran his thumb over your skin

● Shouto leaned in, simultaneously guiding you closer to his face

● His nose fell in place next to yours as he gently brushed his lips over your soft pink skin

● You were surprised with how well and confidently he was kissing you, blissfully unaware of his search history

● He left several little pecks against your lips before finally pressing them flush against his in a deeper kiss

● Your eyes had fluttered shut, experimentally pushing back as his lips moved against yours

● It wasn't long before your mouths had opened and your tongues were gently tapping against each other, aching to explore a foreign cavern

● It was only then that you began to notice just how warm he'd gotten—yet simultaneously cold?

● You flicked your eyes open to see that Todoroki's right side had begun to frost over slightly, his left sending waves of heat rolling onto your body

● You reluctantly pulled away, Shouto's lips cutely chasing after you for a second before he opened his eyes

● "What is it?"

● "Is this getting too intense for you?" you asked

● "Not really. Why?"

● "Your, uh, quirk."

● Shouto glanced down, only now realizing how much he'd unwittingly let it activate

● The frost patches quickly receded, and the heat abated slightly, though to say your own cheeks weren't burning in their own way would be a flat out lie

● "Sorry about that," Shouto apologized

● "It's fine," you waved off, trying to keep your giddy expression toned down

● "So did you . . . enjoy it?" he asked

● "Yeah." Your voice was breathy as you ran a hand through your hair

● Todoroki allowed himself a small smile before settling back into his seat on your bed

● "Want to do it some more later?"

● "Of course!"

● Needless to say, it wasn't long before the two of you had become total pros at kissing

--------------------

Kirishima:

● Kirishima is a very romantic kind of guy

● He'd been thinking about kissing you for a while, but decided it would be more manly to wait for the most perfect moment possible when he could be certain that that was what you both wanted

● You'd gone on a couple of dates together, but he hadn't taken the opportunity to kiss you yet

● Finally, he couldn't get the thought out of his head, the urge to take a step further in your relationship ever-present in his mind

● He planned for it a few days in advance, making sure to get a good time for when you were both free

● It was late when he came to collect you, around eleven o'clock

● He led you outside into the night, making sure the both of you were quiet as he guided you along

● Soon enough, you reached your destination, which was simply a small blanket laid out over a patch of grass in an open area right under the stars

● You both sat down next to each other, the warm night air keeping you just at the right temperature

● Kirishima watched as the light of the stars reflected and twinkled in your eyes, and he thought he'd never seen anything so beautiful as your features lit in their glow

● You began to point out your favorite constellations, tracing the groupings of stars with your finger as you held out your hand to the night sky

● "I love them," you said, referring to the sparkling lights. "Do you ever think about just how far away they are? It's all just so magical and humbling all at once. They may look like little pinpoints of light but we're the small ones, you know?"

● Your voice was so soft in his ear as you scarcely dared to raise it above a whisper. It soothed him, making his eyelids feel comfortably heavy

● Your body pressed closer into his, leaning against him while you looked up and mused

● "They're never gone, either," you continued. "Do you ever think about that? The sun is just too bright for us to be able to see them during the day, but they're there all the same, watching over us."

● Kirishima wanted to be there for you forever, making sure you were happy and safe

● Your wide (E/C) eyes drew him in, your words making his mind swirl

● Before he knew it, his nose had brushed against your cheek, causing your head to turn at the contact

● Your nose bumped against his, and the feeling of his breath fanning over your lips caused your cheeks to warm

● "You know," he muttered, pressing his forehead to yours, "you're more beautiful than all the stars in the sky."

● Before he could close the remaining distance between you, you couldn't help but let out a small chuckle

● "That was really cheesy," you remarked, closing your eyes and letting a small breathy snort leave your nose

● "Aww, what?" Eijirou pulled back a little, causing you to open your eyes again in disappointment at the lack of contact. "I meant it, it's true. And a super manly thing to say."

● You couldn't help but notice the tiny flicker of anxiety in the backs of his ruby red eyes, worried he'd done something wrong

● You couldn't resist that look, the way he pouted ever so slightly, just scarcely able to make out the outlines of his endearingly abnormally sharp teeth

● In that moment, you wanted nothing more than to feel those lips against your own, to feel what those teeth would feel like under your tongue

● "You're right," you finally said, reaching up to hold the back of his head in your hand, fallen red spikes tangling between your fingers

● You pulled him close and let your mouths move together, hesitation quickly changing to courage the longer you left each small peck

● Eijirou was quite possibly the sweetest guy you knew, but you'd never experienced anything so sweet as his kisses. There was no heat behind them, but the passion and love for you was evident all the same

● He eventually pulled away to caress your face, hand cupping your cheek with softest care

● You leaned into his touch and gazed up into his eyes; freckled by the light of the stars. Somehow, the reflections seemed even better than the real ones hung in the tapestry of the atmosphere

● Eijirou pulled you onto his lap and into his chest, where you instinctively clutched and buried your nose into the soft fabric of his t-shirt

● He hummed a little in his throat, beginning to rock back and forth ever so gently as he held you in his arms. You could hear his heart softly pounding deep within him

● His warmth lulled you to slumber, allowing you to slip into the depths of sleep without you scarcely taking notice

● Kirishima allowed you a few minutes to settle, switching between gazing into your sleeping face and back up at the stars

● He finally stood, carrying your limp form back to your room, where he laid you out on your bed and tucked you in

● He felt like he'd done well, and finally went to sleep himself, the taste of your lips still tingling on his tongue

.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇

So, uh, I was going to do Amajiki and Shinsou but I low-key ran out of time and ideas so . . . yeah. Maybe I'll do them later, but probably not. Idk. If someone asked for it I would but for now . . . probably nah.

Anyway, I really liked how these turned out! I hope you did too! My favorite is probably Bakugou's, but I also super enjoyed Kiri's.

Thanks for reading! Have a nice day!

-Sugar

Taglist: @basicaegyo @iiminibattlehero @pyrofanatic @sokkasangel @xoxopam4

#izuku midoriya #izuku midoriya bnha #izuku midoriya x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #shouto todoroki #shouto todoroki x reader #shouto todoroki mha #eijirou kirishima #kirishima x reader #kirishima eijirou x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #reader insert #sugar scens

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awkwardgtace · 3 years

Text

Mira's Fall

TW bad writing about injuries and some blood mention. idk anything else as usual lemme know if I should add any.

Mira's Fall

Mira was watching Corus from the vent above his desk. She was still weary about trusting the human and would frequently observe how he acted when she wasn’t obviously nearby. He’d continued to change behavior, almost no outbursts in the time since she agreed to interact with him. She was impressed, but she didn’t want to trust him yet. She was still nervous if his hands came too close, memories of those times in the walls fresh. He was far too interested in holding her too, always offering to carry her if they were talking and he had to leave the room. He had improved, but she wouldn’t put her life in his hands.

He left the room and she made to climb down. She wanted to talk to him about the garden in the back, there was damage that she couldn’t take care of. The damage was sadly making the plants not grow back, so she wanted to see if he could fix it. He wanted to help so she’d make use of it at least. Hanging her hook carefully from the vent grate she started to climb down. She’d been making more trips down from here; she never considered the strain it may be putting on her rope. She heard a snap and stared up, just out of reach the rope had started to split. She started to rush down only for her to hear the snap again entering a free fall.

She let out a short scream as she fell. She was more relieved than before that Corus chose to move his desk directly under the vent in case this ever happened. She landed hard on the desk surface, hitting her head and feeling her leg bend strangely. Everything went black.

Slowly Mira started to wake back up. She could barely tell where she was, it wasn’t the forest and she shouldn’t be in any human buildings. She had to get home before someone noticed she was missing. She tried to move her leg, pain shooting through her causing a shriek.

She felt human footsteps and panic gripped her. She was hurt, this could and probably would end badly. She tried to move her leg again causing sharp pain to shoot up her spine and spots in her vision. She quickly switched to crawling, trying her best to get to a hiding spot until she could find a way out. Her vision was blurry, she had no clue what happened before she woke up. She just needed to hide, sleep until her eyes cleared up and she could do something.

“Oh my god,” the human said. She kept trying to crawl away, moving away from the booming voice. The human rushed at her and she froze waiting for the hand to grab her. The voice sounded familiar, but that didn’t make sense. After a few seconds of not being touched she opened her eyes, fearfully staring at the human now looming over her. Their hands were held out, but hadn’t reached her yet.

“D-don’t touch me,” she choked out. She was in so much pain, this human would only make things worse. She needed to get away before they let their curiosity win.

“Mira, how can I help? Where are you hurt?” the human asked. The human shouldn’t know her name. She tried to remember why this human would know her, but the pain in her head only got worse. She felt tears fall from her eyes as the worst possibilities ran through her mind. Things weren’t making sense; she just wanted to go home where someone could help fix her up.

“Stay b-back. I-I’ll curse you,” her voice sounded weak. She couldn’t believe her own words; there's no way the human would. They must have caught her, that had to be how they knew her name. She didn’t want to think about what it meant with how injured she was. She heard the human sigh, her blood running cold.

“Mira, it’s me, it’s Corus,” the human sounded sad. “You know I'm not going to hurt you, just tell me what happened. I’m guessing you fell, do you know how far?”

She tried to understand what the human was asking. They said a name, Corus, but that didn’t sound familiar. She just wanted to go home. She needed to treat her leg and her head. Slowly moving her hand, she reached behind her head, pulling it away and in front of her. Blood, she was hoping that wouldn’t be what she found. She needed to get away from the human, there had to be others nearby who could get her out. She still couldn’t see clearly, but it didn’t stop her from noticing the head looming over her coming closer. She started to curl in on herself before pain gripped her again.

“Oh man, your head,” he breathed. “Oh no... Your head. Mira, what do you remember?”

She wouldn’t answer his questions. She told them to stay away, that was enough. If she didn’t answer and just focused on herself they might go away. She barely managed to sit up before she heard a muted gasp above her. She couldn’t focus on that now, her head was bleeding, but that was easy to handle, her leg was the big issue. It hurt to move it, looking at it now it was probably broken. If she didn’t set it then the others would have more trouble trying to get her out of here. She didn’t have her bag though, which was weird. She always had her bag of medical supplies on hand during training. Maybe she snuck out again, yeah that had to be it.

“All right, I’m going to go get the first aid kit, please try not to move too much,” the human said. They ran off quickly and she promptly ignored their request. She had to get somewhere safe until help came. She’d pulled herself a little closer to something that could hide her when the footsteps approached again. Fear gripped at her, would the human be mad she didn’t listen? She pushed that aside and focused on trying to hide still. She couldn’t let fear control her. She was supposed to be the best of her crew and she could deal with this. The human didn’t pause as they entered the room, she didn’t either.

“At least you didn’t jump off the table,” they said with a hint of humor in their voice. That made her stop. Of course she didn’t she wasn’t stupid. That would be a last resort, and only when her leg could handle it. They placed a huge box on the table she was on. They started pulling out a lot of things, some she recognized. The bandages would be useful, so would some of the tubes at least if she was right, her vision still wasn’t great. After they laid everything out they picked up some of the bandages and started unrolling them. They handed her the edge they unrolled. She just stared at it unsure how to use something so big.

“That’s what was missing,” they murmured. She watched the human look around settling on something above them. She held back a scream when they climbed up on something, a chair probably, to reach what they’d seen. She couldn’t tell what they were doing, but didn’t like seeing the already huge human even taller. They were off the chair quickly, the steps down vibrating through her even on this table. They held their hand out to her with something shiny on it. She looked up at them then slowly reached out. She couldn’t explain the need she felt to have whatever they held.

Once her hand was on it she pulled it close. She started to investigate it, was it the fish hook her mom brought her dad once? She wouldn’t take this, why was this here? She had to be wrong; it was just a hook that looked and felt similar. She looked at the human who held the bandage out to her again, still confused. She poked an edge on the hook, what must be her hook, and pulled away sticking her finger in her mouth. This would be sharp enough to cut the bandages. Maybe her dad had sharpened it for her outing? She pushed the questions aside and quickly got to work getting some reasonably sized bandages.

She barely noticed when the human let go of the bandages to start placing other things near her. One of the tubes which had to be the stuff for cuts, it was hard to get usually. They also put some wooden sticks near her, why were those in the box? He also brought some wet towels, leaving them close enough she could move an edge to clean her head easily. She was told humans weren’t kind. Why was this one so kind? She shouldn’t dwell on that, while they were kind she had to treat her injuries. She reached for a wet towel once she thought there were enough bandages and tried to clean her head. It wasn’t going well, unable to see the wound.

“Do you want some help?” they asked. She just froze. They gave her things for her injuries, but she didn’t want to be touched by them. She tried to shake her head, but the pain made her nauseous. “I don’t need to touch you, promise. Wait one second, if it doesn’t help, don't worry about it.”

The human left again quickly. She stared after them. She was told to be wary, not trust any human who offered kindness. They had stories of her kind and a lot created bad situations for the humans. This one wasn’t touching her and was giving her things to treat her wounds. She still wasn’t sure how she got them though. It didn’t seem like the human did it, but maybe they did drop her and cause it. She pushed that away, she wasn’t insane enough to let a human hold her. The human came back into the room holding a mirror, that wouldn’t really help her see the back of her head. They placed the mirror behind her carefully, far enough she wouldn’t touch it by accident.

“All right, we put this up behind you and...” they trailed off. They held a rectangle in front of her. After a second it lit up showing her sitting there with the reflection of her back shown too. Her vision was still sort of blurry, but she could manage. She was struggling to focus, seeing a reflection that seemed off. She didn’t look like what she expected, she looked older, thinner, just not like herself. Slowly she moved a hand watching as the person she saw mimicked the movement.

“That’s not me,” she said. She didn’t realize she spoke until she heard the human sigh above her. They put the rectangle down and moved so their face was even with her.

“I’m not sure what you remember,” their voice was quiet, almost calming. “That is you, I’m sure things don’t make a lot of sense right now, but we need to treat your head and leg. I’ll tell you everything I know after that. I don’t want to leave you alone here, but I’ll stay as far as possible once this is all taken care of all right?”

She gave a small nod and the human moved to hold the rectangle again. She still couldn’t connect with the person copying her movements, but she believed the human. This is her, so what on earth did she forget? She carefully used the wet towel to clean off the blood, the red standing out against the lavender. It was longer than she remembered, making cleaning the blood off a bit harder than she expected. Once it seemed clear of blood she reached a hand into the tube they’d placed nearby and put some of the goop on the wound as best she could. Carefully she wrapped the bandages around her head making sure to leave her eyes clear. Her hair wound up wrapped a little as she went around, but it wasn’t in the wound which was good enough.

Once she was satisfied she looked at her leg. This would hurt to move and she might pass out. The human would have free reign to do anything. She swallowed thickly before making her choice. She couldn’t stop the human awake or passed out, so she would just set her leg quickly and not care. She’d been taught to set broken bones before she was even allowed to leave the community; this was nothing new. She started to prepare herself, taking a deep breath and keeping her tongue from her teeth. She grabbed her leg and quickly snapped it back to a normal position. The pain was worse than she expected though a shriek leaving her as her vision went white.

“...-a…-ra..Mira!” a voice boomed around her. It was so loud, why was it so loud? She opened her eyes slowly, seeing the ceiling above her. She sat up with a groan. “Thank goodness you’re all right. You know we could have numbed your leg first right?!”

She looked at the voice and her memory caught up. The human was helping her, she didn’t look like she remembered, and she was hurt pretty badly. She chose to ignore the human again, reaching for one of the wooden sticks he’d put near her. It was a little out of reach, she flinched when they pushed them closer. She realized her vision had cleared up. She steeled herself to look at the human. Looking up she got a clear look at their face for the first time. The only thing she saw was concern, which made her willing to take a chance.

“C-can you hold this by my leg while I wrap it?” she asked. It took all her courage to look at them again. They had a warm smile, it made her feel safe. Why would a human’s smile make her feel safe? They nodded at her, then slowly brought their hand next to her. They held the stick straight and close to her leg, but didn’t do anything else. She tried to ignore the anxiety of their hand so close, as she wrapped her leg. Slowly she lost herself in the process. Thankfully it didn’t take long before their hand was pulled away and her leg was stabilized. Now she had to figure out a way to get home, but that was easier said than done.

The human started to put all the things back in the box. She still couldn’t understand why they were acting like this. She was confused and tired and her head was just pulsing in pain now. She shouldn’t sleep here, she knew that, but she couldn’t move much at least not for a while. Once the human left the room she gave in, laying back and closing her eyes. She didn’t notice when, but the human put some cloth behind her. It made things a lot more comfortable. She fell into a heavy sleep quickly, her body finally hitting empty after everything.

Corus was currently terrified. He had no idea how to properly take care of Mira, let alone how to convince her she was safe. She couldn’t even recognize herself. She seemed more vulnerable right now, too. He let out a heavy sigh, going to get some water and food to leave with her. She couldn’t keep going with what seems like a large portion of her life missing. He left the kitchen making his steps heavier, expecting her to be trying to hide or staring at him in fear. Instead she was asleep. He approached as quietly as he could, placing what he brought near her. He should leave, but he didn’t want to abandon her on his desk. He sat in his chair and placed his head on his arms, just waiting. He’d help as best he could, she didn’t trust him before this anyway.

Mira’s next few days were a blur. Every time she woke up the human was there, but they were still kind. She would drink some water and eat, but sleep would quickly take her again. She couldn’t make herself stay awake, although she tried to. It seemed like things would stay like this until she was healed. Then she’d finally find out what the human had planned for her. The human just always seemed kind of sad when she did wake up.

The first day she woke up, really woke up, things felt different. Corus had left a mirror on her desk. She looked in it and was surprised to see her head wrapped with bandages. She must have been out for a while after she fell. Corus must have helped her when he found her. She didn’t love the idea of him handling her while she was out, but she was grateful. If it had been left alone she’d have a much worse recovery time.

“Mira, are you awake?” Corus asked, quietly knocking on the door. He didn’t wait for a reply, opening the door slowly. She saw his face light up when he noticed her sitting up, he must have been worried. He flashed a warm smile. “Good morning, just have to grab some stuff then I’ll be out of your hair for most of the day.”

“It’s your room, you should just stay in here, I can probably make my way home at this point,” she said. Her voice cracked like she hadn’t spoken in days, but she couldn’t have been out that long. Shock quickly took over his features. He was on his knees in front of her faster than she could react. Humans had more speed than they used and she didn’t like that. He looked like he was about to cry, it shouldn’t be that shocking she said she’d go home. Resting for a day should get her enough strength to get back.

“Mira, you remember me?” his voice was almost too quiet for her.

“I doubt I could forget the human who basically begged me to give him a chance,” she couldn’t help the bit of snark. It wasn’t like she could just forget a human she’d agreed to give a chance. Why would Corus ask if she remembered him?

“How’s your head? Your leg? Do you really remember? It’s ok not to know me, you can leave when you feel up to it. Do you feel up to changing the bandages? Do you want to go somewhere--”

“Corus, I’ll be fine. I’ve broken my leg before. I should be fine to head back at this point.” She cut off his rambling. She appreciated the concern, but it wasn’t like this was the first time she got hurt.

Corus laid his head on the table, a relieved laugh leaving him. Slowly he explained the last few days, the things she didn’t remember. Threatening to curse him, looking terrified every time he entered the room. She treated him like a monster while he just tried to help her. She felt guilt well up inside her, this all happened because she’d been coming to get help. She opened her mouth to try and apologize, when he lifted his head. He looked so relieved, she didn’t know how to act.

“I’m really glad you remembered,” he said. She didn’t really understand, it would have been better if she forgot about him. Then he could have made her trust him without the background of his outbursts. She wouldn’t consider him violent anymore. He was happier that she still knew. Maybe he was different than she’d seen.

“A-actually, could I stay here until my leg heals more?” she asked. His eyes went wide and she regretted asking. That was stupid, she was stupid, she shouldn’t stay like this. She was ready to back track immediately.

“Honestly I was going to ask you to,” he said looking away. “Before you get upset, I know you can take care of yourself, but that was a pretty bad fall. I’d like to make sure you don’t have to make any injury worse. Are you all right if I work at this computer while you’re recovering?”

“Yeah, um, thank you,” she said. He gave her another large smile then moved to his desk chair rather than the ground. She considered this human with a violent streak who was terrified she’d hurt herself. He seemed to really care, maybe, just maybe, it was safe to trust him. She carefully laid back down, hearing him right next to her was shockingly calming. She had to be honest with herself at this point. She not only trusted this human, but believed he would keep her safe. She could maybe spend some more time with him.

#gt writing #gt #OC:Mira #OC:Corus #giant/tiny #gianttiny #g/t #g/t writing

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mythicamagic · 3 years

Note

As usual... I can never just choose one... soo here are my top choices you choose one. Lol

1. Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?

2. The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.

3.that ship has sailed. i’ve had my one great love already

4. we’re just…friends.” “friends don’t do this type of shit!

5. Did you just slap my ass?” / “Actually, I firmly grasped it.”

Why did I decide 2 of the hurt/sad/angst.. idk.. i suppose im glutton for punishment. Dont hurt me too bad if you choose to do one of them myth.

Decided to do a part two for - this ask.

I chose; The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.

---

The air felt crisp and clean, biting at Kagome's cheeks as she wound her scarf tighter around her neck. Winter markets were so much fun. The vast array of cute little items on display made warmth light up her chest, even as the candy and children's toys reminded her of a certain fox she'd left behind in the past.

Kagome smiled at Ayumi as she prattled on about something or other.

She shouldn't feel guilty. Shippo had barely visited the village in the last year she'd been there. Everyone had moved on. Including herself, somewhat. She'd been so wrapped up in her whirlwind romance with a certain Daiyoukai- the feudal era had been irreparably damaged as a home for her the second they'd broken up.

But she missed her friends. Dearly.

She shook herself. It was too late to go back on her choice now. The well had sealed shut for good.

Ayumi stopped to grab some hot chocolate from a street vendor, allowing Kagome a moment to warm her hands, rubbing them together.

Snowflakes gently danced about like powdered sugar, kissing Kagome's face as she turned- almost bumping face-first into a muscular chest. Fresh scents of wild forests and thunderstorms filled her nose, and she stiffened.

He smells the same.

Kagome bit the inside of her cheek, blue eyes narrowing. "Don't think I don't know what you're doing."

"Haven't the faintest idea of what you mean," he arranged his features into mild innocence, which was near impossible due to his smiling eyes.

"Riiight," she muttered, wishing Ayumi would hurry up.

Sesshoumaru gazed down at her, a pink gift bag in hand. Kagome grit her teeth, hating that she wondered who it was meant for.

"I did not intend to run into you here, before you accuse me of anything," his silky voice caressed her hearing once more. It sounded so lulling, designed to draw her back in. "Did you take my gift home with you or did you throw it away?" he asked, deceptively casually.

"Home. But don't think that means anything- it's not the plant's fault you're trying to worm your way back into my life."

The Daiyouki smiled to himself, obviously absurdly pleased. He began pursuing the street vendor's items right beside her, gazing at children's toys with a touch of gentleness in his steady gaze. Kagome was prepared to ignore him- until he leaned down, breath fanning 'accidentally' over her cheek as he picked up a doll and straightened.

"Do you remember Rin? And the other children-"

"Don't," Kagome said, unable to move away. She hated the thrumming of her skin so much. The way it cried out. Hated him.

Her skin flared alive, body humming with hunger. Like a shot of adrenalin to the heart, Kagome dipped her chin into her scarf to try and mask her escalating breathing due to his proximity. When they'd had sex- so many years ago- it hadn't been like human lovemaking.

He'd wired new pathways within her system via his youki. Sometimes she felt like it still lived inside her, having made a home for itself. They hadn't mated, but she felt irreversibly changed by it.

Kagome made a faint noise, squeezing her eyes shut.

Resist him-

"Kagome?"

Oh thank God.

"Ayumi, let's go," she said abruptly, facing her friend with an urgent look in her eyes.

Ayumi tilted her head slightly, eyeing Sesshoumaru curiously. "A-alright?"

"You do not need to leave," he turned, exuding a magnanimous air. "I am the one who intruded on your time, please continue," he gestured to the market, ensnaring Kagome's gaze with his own. Unblinking, unable to hide his more animalistic habits even after so many years.

"I hope to see you some other time when my presence does not disturb you," he said softly, walking away.

---

When entering work that Saturday, Kagome could already sense the buzz in the air. Someone had generously donated some priceless artefacts to their museum. The previously undiscovered finds that shaken everyone due to their rarity and mint condition. No one could stop talking about it.

Kagome's blood ran cold the second the items in question were described to her. Pushing through the crowd that had gathered, she stared in horror at the display case.

Itching for a fight, she immediately stormed to his office downtown, opening the door to reception and letting herself in. "Is Sesshoumaru here?" she burst, stopping in front of the secretary's desk.

"Mr Taisho?" the woman blinked, obviously thrown by the petite, angry miko currently glaring at her and using his name so informally. "Do you have an appointment?"

"No. Just tell him Kagome is here."

She was let into his office soon enough, trying to keep a lid on her crackling reiki. Sesshoumaru glanced up from his computer. "Miko? What a pleasant surprise."

Kagome slammed an article atop his desk. "What the hell is wrong with you?" she snapped.

He raised a brow, briefly flicking his attention to the contents. A photo of red and white silks, coupled with polished spiked armour sat in a display unit. "Something wrong? It was just a donation, given in good faith."

"Donated to my workplace!" Kagome seethed, groaning and burying her face in her hands. "Don't you realise I'm going to have to see your things now every day? I've worn those clothes! I've slept in them as pyjamas! Are you trying to mess with me because you want me back?"

"That's a little dramatic, dear one, I'm not trying to 'mess with you.' It was just a donation," he rose from his seat, face inches from hers. "And if I wanted to romance you, I'd go about it much differently."

"Don't 'dear one' me," she snapped. "You could've donated that stuff years ago- or to a different museum. But no, you had to give it to mine."

"My gift was not meant to distress you, but," he rounded the table slowly, fingers dragging over the wood. "It does make me worry, seeing you so worn thin. Is something else going on? Separate from...us?"

Kagome stiffened, avoiding eye contact. Things with her boyfriend had been strained as of late, and the Daiyoukai's sudden appearance back into her life wasn't helping matters.

"There is no 'us.' I'm frustrated and exhausted, that's all. Don't make things even more complicated by asking about that stuff."

Sesshoumaru lingered close, and Kagome didn't shy away. The one person she couldn't bear to be near was also the only being who could offer some semblance of comfort to her due to his familiarity.

"This one meant to give you something," reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a business card, handing it over. Kagome immediately froze, staring at the name. "You miss him," Sesshoumaru murmured. "The kit lives in Kyoto now with his wife and children. Call him."

Tears pricked her eyes, and Kagome bowed her head. Full lips crumpled into a wobbly line.

"If there is something I regret more than our parting, it is that you felt compelled to leave. The fault lies with me."

Shaking her head, a saddened laugh bubbled up her throat. "It was my decision to break up, and it was my decision to leave the Feudal Era. Don't...blame yourself for that part."

"You did not do anything wrong," a long-fingered hand reached out, blunt nails losing their glamour. Sharp claws stroked dark curling hair back from her neck. Kagome's breathing hitched. "When we were together- you did not do anything wrong. We were both so young. It was foolish of me to act as I did, but I think it is now... that we are in the right place for something more."

Kagome shivered, body warming to him. Intuitively, the brush of fingers on her neck made her foolishly anticipate a kiss- sorely disappointed when it didn't come. "I'm not," she forced herself to say. Seeing the disappointment darken his brown eyes, she sighed. "I miss you," Kagome admitted quietly, turning away to escape from his touch. "I miss how... we were. I'm terrified of that, though. I was...under the impression we'd be together. Permanently. Then you had to go and tell me you needed 'pure' heirs to continue the family bloodline."

She laughed bitterly, loosely holding her arms. "The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I'm still in love with you."

"You are frightened that I will hurt you again."

Kagome nodded mutely. She then forced a giggle, giving a weak smile. "Besides, you may not like me as I am now. I'm more jaded than before."

"I like what I see very much," moving closer once more as though experiencing a gravitational pull, he stopped inches away. "I have missed you too," he muttered quietly, genuinely. She could feel him inhale her scent through her hair. "Very much."

Her mouth suddenly became dry. "I'm with Natsuki-"

"Leave him," a rush of passion entered his voice as Sesshoumaru swept closer, backing her into the desk. The wood dug into her thighs, their hips meeting. "This one is not interested in being 'the other man' in an affair. Nor am I interested in watching you remain with someone less than ideal," he snorted, resting his hand over her wrist and grazing his thumb over it.

"Y-you don't know anything about it!"

"I could smell your scent. It was not bright and cheerful even before I re-entered your life the other day. His feels...murky on you. Unhappy."

Kagome swallowed thickly, glancing away. "Observant as ever," she admitted softly.

"Or perhaps you did a poor job of hiding it," backing off a little- he rested his hip next to hers beside the desk, remaining near but barely touching. And yet everything felt so close. "You've changed. But you're still the same at your core, miko," hot breath fanned over her neck, teeth ghosting over the shell of her ear. "If you permitted me, I would not be reckless with your heart again, as I was in my youth."

Her palms traitorously slid up, sliding over firm muscles- running across his chest. He felt warm. His heart was beating fast. Was he nervous? Such a thing sounded impossible.

She bit her lip, secretly longing for the sensation of silks under her hands again instead of the modern cotton of his shirt.

"I don't know that I believe you," Kagome met his gaze, rewarded with the golden glow of his eyes instead of human brown.

"I've gotta go," she said reluctantly, forcing herself to pull away. "I need to be at work."

"Very well," he hummed, unmoving. "But if you...need something. You know where to find me."

He sounded almost desperate for an excuse to talk with her. Giving a curt nod, she let herself out of his office with a long breath, shaking her head. Sesshoumaru's static youki haunted her steps for the remainder of the day.

#Sesskag #Sesshoumaru x Kagome #asks

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wickedgamesoyaoya · 4 years

Note

Captain I see you have requests open🥺🥺🥺🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳 if you don't mind can pretty please have Akaashi angsty to fluff if you can if not then only fluffy🥺🥺🥺🥺 it can be smau or written which youd like and can it please be the 15❤️❤️❤️❤️

The venomous wavelengths shooting through the high school hallways did not begin quietly. The sound erupted without warning the second the status of your relationship with Akaashi Keiji was revealed. Although, no one was truly interested in you, the problem was who you had chosen as your partner. The setter for Fukurodani’s boy’s volleyball club was titled a prince of the academy, sharing that title with the captain, Bokuto Koutarou. But the titles thrust upon individuals by the student body did not hold much weight to someone who had moved to the school recently. And it would hold no weight to someone who merely wanted a friend, but accidentally discovered much more.

“Hey, y/n. You okay?” Concern decorated Akaashi’s delicate features, a sight that had the power to bathe your heart in temporary relief. If only you could bottle the properties of his affection for later use, that way you could survive the emotional hits that were awaiting you once he left for class.

“I’m fine.” The response has become automatic at this point, requiring little mental process. It had been two weeks since you had acquired a target on your back. And Akaashi was blissfully unaware of the whispers that were casually transported from one mouth to the other. The commentary was never meant for his ears. Every time he emerged from the crowd to join your side, the conductor would silence the orchestra, with each player obediently complying.

You should have told him about it; you knew that. But instead you chose to battle the storm on your own. Akaashi had other matters on his mind – why would you add to the numerous anxieties that fogged the space around him?

“I’ll see you after class, okay?” The limited pain relief his presence granted you was used to present a confident smile. As always, you would ease his worries, just the way he eased yours.

“Okay. But if something happens, or you need me… Text me.” The way he scanned your face flooded your stomach with nausea, yet the smile remained plastered, unwavering.

You would be his courage; you would be his strength. You would deal with the worst that was thrown at you. And you would show them all that you were enough, even if they didn’t deserve to find out.

While the insecurity may have begun small, not much larger than a single droplet, it quickly morphed. The emotion contaminated more and more, until your entire body was compromised. Things would have been easier if you had a friend, someone to confide in. Someone you could lower your fists around. It also did not help that Akaashi continued his inquiry into your mental state. As more time went on, it became harder and harder to swallow the bitter words. Afraid to taint him with the blood of your words, you continuously shook off his questions, smiling to conceal the substance inside of your mouth.

While the goal stitched into your armour was commendable, it was equally foolish. And Konoha was the first one to pierce through the shield you had adorned.

“You don’t have any friends here outside of us, do you?” The male was drenched in sweat from practice, yet instead of joining the others in the showers, he decided to provide you company as you waited for Akaashi.

“Are you trying to insult me?” Raising an eyebrow, you shifted your weight against the doorframe. Konoha was one of the few third years who made a considerable effort to speak with you, and you appreciated it.

“No. It was an observation from a worried friend.” He studied your change in posture, toying with the volleyball in his grasp. Although, he almost dropped it when he caught the alarm striking your features.

“I’m okay.” You tried to package it with a sturdy tone, but the wing spiker didn’t seem to buy it.

“Yeah… I’m not Akaashi. I’m not gonna believe that.” The answer was offered after he stole a glance over his shoulder. “You know I hear them too? The things they’re saying.”

“So, let them say it. If people want to talk shit, they can. It’s how high schoolers are.” A weak shrug brought your shoulders to raise and drop.

“True enough, but that doesn’t mean you need to deal with it alone.” The additional emphasis on alone made you twitch involuntarily. Weakness was not to be shown, and yet you were unable to maintain your façade around him.

“He’s already got so many things to worry about. I’m not going to add to that.” Casting your attention aside, you chewed on the inside of your cheek.

“Alright, so lay them on me instead. If you can’t rely on your boyfriend, at least rely on a friend.” Releasing the volleyball in a fluid movement, a grin pushed at the corners of his mouth.

“That sounds nice.” Puzzled, the reply escaped your lips softly.

“Cool. We’ll talk later kid.” Proceeding a step away, he gave you a thumbs up motion before sprinting off the court.

And for the first time in awhile you remembered that your armour was not skin, you could remove it, and sometimes you should.

The conversation that occurred at the gym led to a confession of the feelings you were suffocating in. Upon hearing the cruel reality you were the protagonist of, Konoha vowed to help you. For the following weeks, if Akaashi was not present to subdue the pain, Konoha was. His terrible comedy was enough to distract you from the poison your fellow students were trying to inject you with. And when both boys were unavailable, the wing spiker would ask his other friends to accompany you.

It was a start. You were finally able to begin to collect the shattered pieces of your soul, all without bleeding in the process.

However, withholding information from your boyfriend would not come without a cost. And with your changing relationship with Konoha, a new wave of uncertainty had been cast onto your relationship.

“Have fun at practice, Keiji.” Extending your toes, you pressed your lips against Akaashi’s in a fleeting kiss. But when you settled back onto the ground, the setter wrapped his arms around your waist, keeping you mounted into the spot ahead of him. “Hm? Is something wrong?”

“Do you still have feelings for me, y/n?” The question visibly pained him, the small wrinkles in his forehead illustrated his stress. But the signs of agony were replaced with relief when you stared up at him in disbelief.

“What? Of course, I do.” Planting your palms on either side of his face, your chest constricted. At first you wondered if the rumours had finally reached his ears – did he think your love wasn’t true?

“So then, why can you tell Konoha-san what is hurting you but not me?”

The question did not eliminate the strain weighing on your chest, instead the sensation increased, with guilt adding to the mix.

“Keiji, I don’t want to burden you.” It took every ounce of courage you could gather to keep you from turning into an apologetic mess.

“That’s not fair, now is it? Your feelings will never be a burden to me.” Exhaling softly, he relocated his hands to cover yours, before guiding your left palm to his lips.

“You say that but…” The warmth from his kiss soon spread across your body, dissolving the armour you were desperately clinging to.

“Won’t you let me be there for you? What if I ask very nicely?” Tilting his head, he blinked slowly and thoughtfully down at you. A tactical move really.

“…Keiji. I want you to be happy. I want to be your safe place. I want to be strong for you.” The explanation sounded like a low whine, partially stripping the seriousness behind the words.

“I want that too, y/n. Let me be your safe place.” His irises naturally were drawn to the pout registered upon your mouth, and he had to resist the urge to kiss you. “I know in the past you had to deal with everything on your own. But for the present and the future, I want to be there beside you. Your problems are now mine.”

“You know, you really are a prince.” Defeated, you shook your head then blew out a heavy sigh.

“Your prince.” A dim smile graced his mouth as he pressed his forehead against yours. Instinctively, you sought to capture his lips with yours but the emergence of another person forced you to stop.

“What’s going on here? If we’re doing a group hug, I want in!”

Upon recognizing who the voice belonged to, Akaashi quickly released your hands and whipped around to face the Ace.

“Bokuto-san wait-”

But his instructions were dismissed by the Captain, and within seconds a larger person joined your embrace, bringing the three of you onto the ground. Laughter filled the corridor as Akaashi tried to keep Bokuto from squishing you with his weight. The setter mouthed an apology, prompting you to shake your head with a smile.

Maybe this would be enough. Maybe you didn’t need the entire school to know your worth. As long as you knew it, and those you loved did… that would be enough.

A/N: My sweet baby bodyguard, I hope you liked this! I kinda put some heart into this one, idk. ;-;

General taglist: @haikyuufairy @newfriendjen @lvoejimin @moonlightaangel @gyozaaaaa @byun-nies @thevillagehiddenintheinternet @amberalisa @graykageyama @yourstarvic @chaichai-the-weeb @dreamstormings @chibishae34 @haikyuusimp91 @volleybloop @rajablast @idiot-juice-enthusiast @melonmayhere @cuddlesslut @athenarosaline @memes-and-money @coconut-dreamz @mismatched-loves @elianetsantana @tsumume @tsukkismamagucci @the-golden-jhope @camcam1617 @ivsahi @prettyforpapiiwa @swoonhui @neobakas

Bolded means I can’t tag ya, and if you would like to be removed, please message me! ~

#haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu akaashi #akaashi x y/n #akaashi angst #akaashi imagine #akaashi x you #akaashi x reader #akaashi fanfiction

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quietmyfearswith · 4 years

Text

to build a home {dark!bucky barnes x fem!reader}

status — ongoing (?) idk i had a second part in mind but we’ll see

warnings — somnophilia (so non-con), male mastubration, unprotected penetrative sex (in my head the reader has birth control), rough sex, hints at breeding kink, slight praise kink, degradation, attempt at fluff, i think thats all but let me know if i miss something

word count — 9,351 words

a/n — i had this idea for an airbnb thing where the host was into the guest and perfect timing that @imanuglywombat was having a challenge, congratulations by the way on your achievement! and one of the moodboards was a mountain-themed one (the one at the left) and the prompt that i chose was By the cracks of the skin I climbed to the top/I climbed the tree to see the world/When the gusts came around to blow me down/I held on as tightly as you held onto me which is an excerpt from the song to build a home by the cinematic orchestra. i tried not to directly quote the lyrics but instead imply it as best as i can. had fun writing this and was the longest fic i’ve ever written. feedback would be very much appreciated,, have a great day and stay safe guys!

masterlist

Bucky Barnes needed a vacation.

Needed, not wanted or desired, for it was what he required in order to function like a proper human being. Considering every bullshit he’s been through — the world war, the brainwashing, fighting for his life, dying and then being brought back to life — he was definitely entitled to a break.

After bringing everyone back, the team now strives to bring back order and peace. Bucky agreed to be part of the Avengers and SHIELD, but with a unique position. He’d train and prepare their recruits by whipping them into shape and go on missions only if he was deemed as an essential asset. The only reason he took that position because that was what Steve did as he passed down the title of Captain America to Sam. Stark too just became one of the representatives of the organization in order to focus on his family.

It was tricky at first — looking for food and water, source of electricity, gathering supplies, and having the money to do so. That’s when Tony suggested he put his a-framed house on an application called Airbnb. He was confused at first but his simple understanding was that someone would pay him if he agreed to share his house for a given number of days.

The suggestion worked well. Most of those who booked stayed one day and one night, the longest someone stayed was two days and a night. And it wasn’t because he used to be the Winter Soldier and they feared him, but simply because they needed a place to stay before heading up further into the mountains.

Despite the house having three bedrooms, Bucky only posted one being available. The other two bedrooms he prohibited the guests to stay on, even to enter, since those were reserved for him and Steve. Vacationers who stayed in here were very much respectful of his wishes and didn’t pry further more.

As he was watering the selection of plants, vegetables, and fruits that he has, he felt his phone vibrate in his back pocket. Setting the watering can down, he pulled out his phone and noticed how there was notification saying that someone booked the available bedroom he had.

“Booked for 2 weeks?” He read out loud the details of how long the stay of his upcoming visitor would last. It was odd to say the least, but who was he to judge someone for their stay? Tucking the phone back to his pants, he noticed how Alpine was drinking from the watering can he put down, he stroked her fur and smiled when he purred and nuzzled her face further into his palm, “Looks like we’ll have someone staying with us for quite a while, Al,” the 3 month old kitten simply looked up at him and purred once more, “Be a good girl for me alright?”

Following the notice that someone was gonna stay in his house for two weeks, Bucky busied himself in preparing the house — which took only two days for him to do so. He made sure that the rented bedroom was cleaned and that the bed sheets were changed and cleaned. Cleaning up Alpine’s hairballs and fallen furs was something he also did in preparation.

It was a sunny Tuesday morning and he was sitting down on one of the patio chairs, reading a book with Alpine on his lap, when he heard a car pulling up. Setting the book down on the small patio table, he took in the Jeep Wrangler that was parking, but what really caught his attention was who stepped out of the car.

“Hi, I’m Y/N! Are you Bucky? The one who owns the place I’ll be renting for the next two weeks?” Her tone was gentle and friendly, but it was her smile that really captured Bucky’s attention even more. Shakily, he replied, “Yeah, it’s me. Nice to meet you,” he held out his right hand — his other hand had a glove to conceal the metal — for her to shake, to which she shook his hand.

“Oh there’s the cat you mentioned,” she unclasped her hand with his and took note of the fur ball that was standing beside Bucky — it was just really her way of getting his attention and wanting more rubs. “Oh yeah, this is Alpine, hope you’re not allergic or anything?” he wondered as he picked Alpine up and massaged her face a bit, to which she purred loudly.

Y/N chuckled at the scene in front of her, “Not allergic, just wasn’t around cats a lot so I’m not used to them.” Bucky admired her honesty and assured her, “Well don’t worry about her, she’s extremely well-behaved.”

Usually, the guests had no problem bringing in their things from their respective cars and into their room. But there was something about her aura and personality that made him want to stay close to her as much as he could. So he suggested that he help her in bringing in her items. “Did you run away or something? Because I’m telling you now, near the mountains might not be the ideal place to do so,” he joked as he carried two of her duffel bags. As he opened the door to where she’d be sleeping for almost half a month, he put down her bags on top of the dresser.

Y/N set down the backpack and messenger bag she had near the night side table, “Well if the mountains aren’t ideal, then why are you here then?” she retorted back as she sat down on the edge of the bed. Bucky leaned on the dresser and crossed his arms and looked at her with wonder, “So you’re gonna turn this back on me huh?” he teased her.

To which she giggled at, “I’ll tell you my reason for staying here for two weeks if you tell me how you ended up here,” she persuaded him. He sighed dramatically and smiled right after hearing her laugh again at his antics, “The simple answer? I’m here for a vacation. A much needed and a long overdue one at that. How about you?”

She pursed her lips and nodded, she felt that maybe there was more to that but didn’t want to seem nosy so she explained her stay, “Well I’m here to test out some mountain and hiking equipment. It’s my work actually we’re this company that advertises and reaches out to endorsers and tells them about certain products like that one,” she pointed to the duffel bags behind him, “I get to test them, give them an honest review of the products and then let them know.”

“Huh, that’s a unique job,” he said as he ran his hand on his stubbled chin, “Well, I’m gonna let you settle down for now. Feel free to roam around the house, the other two bedrooms are the only ones off-limits,” he informed her and started to make his way out of the bedroom when he heard her call out, “Thanks, Bucky! You’re a great host, so far. Just let me know when I annoy you too much!”

Though it was meant to be a joke, the super soldier thought to himself, Don’t think you will ever annoy me, baby girl.

Before it was even noon, Bucky found himself preparing pasta. What was unusual, is that he was making food enough for the both of them. Usually, he wouldn’t go out of his way to prepare meals for his guests; but he would allow them to use the kitchen as they please as long given that they clean it up after and place things back as they were. But there was something about Y/N that inspired him to make an effort.

Just as he turned the stove off and closed the lid with his left hand that had an oven mitt, he heard footsteps coming from the stairs, and he looked up to see her descending form and smiled warmly at her, “I cooked some pasta, just if you wanna eat or something,” he nervously mumbled as she finally stopped on the opposite side of where he was and sat down on one of the bar stools. “Smells good, I’d love to have a bite if you will too.”

Bucky then brought out two bowls and as he filled them with pasta, Alpine was clawing at his feet and her paws felt a bit warm to his legs that were exposed since he was wearing basketball shorts. As he handed her one of the bowls, he bent down and tucked his beloved kitten onto the sweater he wore, so her head was the only thing seen as it dangled from the neckline of his sweater. “That’s adorable! She just really loves you doesn’t she?” Y/N cooed watching how the kitten peacefully closed her eyes and snuggled closer to Bucky even though he walked around before sitting down beside her, she noticed as well how he didn’t care to remove the mitt on his left hand.

“I was surprised as well with how she loved human touch, which made me think that she isn't a cat but instead a dog, actually,” he shared as she looked at Y/N and smiled as she laughed as she ate. “Though I am curious as to why you’re wearing a sweater when it’s one of the hottest days of July?” As soon as the question left her mouth, she felt how there had been a shift in the atmosphere. How the fun and breezy energy they both were radiating earlier had been converted into something that was stiff and somber.

“I mean, you don’t really need to tell me,” she assured him right away, her right hand reaching for his left forearm and she gently caressed it even though she found it odd how his arm seemed to be more rigid than it looked like, “I was just worried that you might get too hot to the point of dehydration or heat stroke or something like that.” Bucky nodded and went back to ingesting the meal he cooked.

“You’re already hot, but I don’t want you to be too hot to the point you combust,” that comment of hers was something she muttered lowly. But it wasn’t soft enough to get past his super soldier hearing, “Did you say something?” Bucky asked and he tried his best for his facial features to not give away the fact that he heard her clearly. With wide eyes, she just shook her head and quickly filled her mouth with pasta to avoid explaining what it was she said.

Deciding to spare her from shame and embarrassment, he decided to change the topic by asking, “Do you have an itinerary for today?” He looked at her and saw how she had already finished her pasta and was making a move to wash her bowl and utensils, “I’m planning to go for a bit of hike — to test out some items like trekking poles, water jug, backpack, and this windbreaker they made me try out.”

“That sounds fun,” Bucky commented as he placed the fork on his bowl, waiting for her to finish cleaning up, “Would you wanna tag along with me?” as she looked up to ask him, she looked nervous. Perhaps she was filled with doubts and hesitation that she might seem invasive of his privacy, and indeed, that was what she was thinking about.

Smiling warmly at her, Bucky expressed his desire to join her in the hike, “I’d love to join you, doll.”

45 minutes had already passed since they started their hike and there was probably a few more minutes before they would finally reach the higher portion of the mountain. “I think it’s great you agreed to come along with me, Bucky,” the super soldier heard her mention behind him. He was taking the lead and guiding her as she followed him and held on to her trekking poles to stabilize her. “Why’d you think that, doll?” He looked back to her and held his right hand for her to take, to which she did and helped her go higher than to where she was currently.

She let out a breath, which made him chuckle at her antics, “Well for one, I wouldn’t have an amazing tour guide,” she teased him as she jokingly nudged his abdomen with her finger. Normally, Bucky would flinch or turn away when someone he doesn’t really know or is not completely familiar with touches him, especially when it was the metal arm. But this was already the third time she’d touch her and in those three times he did once did not find it uncomfortable.

“And second, I’d get lonely during this trip,” she concluded as she smiled brightly at him. “I’m glad to have joined you as well, doll.” The nickname he gave her made her blush to which he thought that the rose color looked good on her. “And I don’t know if you noticed, but there’s an amazing view behind me. So enjoy the view, doll.” When Bucky moved to the side, that was when Y/N had a chance to fully see the view, and it was unlike anything she has ever seen. The clear lake was breathtaking & the clouds were scattered in the sky though it did not shelter the sunlight. “Wow,” she breathed out and turned to her host and tilted her head when he saw his gloved hands reaching for his backpack and getting a blanket and laid it on the ground. As he sat on it, he patted the spot beside him, a cue for her to take the spot.

Putting her backpack down, she placed the trekking poles beside it before settling on the spot the man beside her patted. “You come here often?” she inquired, she was pretty sure he did since he knew how to get there quickly and safely. “Not everyday, just when I’m bored with housework,” he said as he took off the glove in his right hand.

She nodded and went to get the thermos from her backpack, as well as some chips and chocolates that she offered him, to which the super soldier opted for the chocolate. “So it means you are always here then huh?” she joked to which he laughed loudly, and she thought how adorable it was to see him crinkle the side of his eyes as he carelessly threw his head back in laughter. “I’m serious! You can only do so much housework before you get bored in your house!” she argued.

“Honestly, I’d rather be bored,” Bucky started as he munched on the chocolate she’d given, “For the longest time I was always busy, to put it nicely. And it’s a relief to be ridden of exhausting responsibilities.” Her heart ached at what he said, she might have not fully known what his work was but she could feel the exasperation in his voice. “Sorry for what I said, I was just teasing you,” she offered him a small smile.

Tickling her sides, he relished in the giggles she released, “I know, we don’t need to bring the mood down,” he assured her, “So, what is your review so far of the items you have?” His mention of it did remind her how she needed to take note of how she was satisfied or dissatisfied with the products, shuffling through the things in her backpack, she reached for the notebook which housed the feedback she had for different products.

Writing down her remarks, she also voiced it out for Bucky to hear, “The water jug did keep my water cold. Backpack’s material was not too heavy but it was able to fit all of my items. And this windbreaker,” she struck a pose which once again made Bucky laugh and it made her feel good to know that she can get him to laugh, “Did make me sweat but it’s too thin it’s making me chilly.”

Just as she mentioned how the windbreaker failed to prevent her from feeling cold, there was a gust of cool wind that when she felt it graze her skin, made her visibly shiver. Bucky didn’t like how she frowned on the sensation of being hit with the frosty breeze and wrapped her arms around herself; despite only wearing his sweater and a jacket, he didn’t have to react the same way thanks to the serum. He moved behind her and pressed his chest against her back, wrapping both his arms around her; his right hand wrapped around her stomach while the left hand rested on her thigh.

A sharp intake of breath signified how she was taken aback, but she didn’t find it awkward and instead she found herself instinctively leaning against his chest until the top of her head was just right under his chin. “Is this alright?” she wondered to him, and when she sounded so small, so vulnerable. As he smiled, he comforted her, “Wouldn’t have come close to you if it wasn’t alright, now would I?”

To hide the blush starting to form, she turned away from him and began to write on her notebook about her observations. They sat comfortably in silence; Bucky’s eyes wandered around the scenery, while Y/N was heavily focused on writing the feedback for the different products she got to try so far. The hand on her thigh that was gently caressing her and the steady yet strong heartbeat of the man behind her provided her with a sense of tranquility unlike anything she ever felt.

Leaving the pen on the inside of the notebook, she closed it and placed it beside her backpack. While still looking at the lake she shared with him, “I’ve always wanted to live by the lake.” Not having enough of her warmth and wanting to be close to her, he pushed himself even closer to her, to the point their thighs were now touching each other. “Yeah? Why’s that?”

She shrugged her shoulders and leaned back so the back of her head touched his right shoulder, “Always loved being in the water — whether I’m swimming or rowing a boat. Doesn’t matter what as long as I’m near the water I’m the happiest there.” As she said that he couldn’t help as his mind was filled with the images of the two of them living together and going for daily trips to the lake. And how they’d probably end up fucking or making love by the lake.

Managing to bring himself back to the present, Bucky suggested, “Why not live with me then? That way you’ll always be a few minutes away from the lake.” Her laugh was so loud that he felt the vibrations of it through his chest with how close they were. “Don’t wanna burden you forever, you know? But maybe when I’ve saved enough and I don’t know, have the ability to work from home, I might just move near a lake.”

He frowned at her thought that she considered himself a burden. They’ve spent almost a day and yet he knew in himself how he wanted to spend every day of his life with her. It might seem too soon for that, but he argued that he felt safe with her. That she made him happy. But there was this thought that lingered on his mind; that he was just deprived of affection for the longest time and now that someone’s been showering him with it, he doesn’t want to go a day without experiencing it ever again.

“Well, you’re always welcome in my house, it’s not really much of a home to me anyway,” the optimism in the first part was overshadowed by the sadness in the latter part of his statement. She looked over at Bucky and was saddened to see how his shoulders dropped and there was a sad smile on his lips, “What?” Because what else could she really say?

His eyes refused to meet her concerned orbs, and instead looked at anything but her. “With everything I’ve been through and done, it would be difficult for me to find someone to settle down with.” Upon hearing this, Y/N felt glum with Bucky's response and with how he looked as he said it. She held his right hand and squeezed it reassuringly, “Whatever it is you’ve done and been through is in the past. I’m sure that you’ve changed and grown from who you once were. You deserve to be happy, Bucky.”

What if I wanna be happy with you, baby? He thought to himself for a few seconds, and in a split second decision, he unclasped their hands and reached to where his left hand was still wrapped with a glove. “I’m going to be showing you something, and before you can ask me anything, I’d rather get everything off my chest first, alright?” Y/N looked uneasy yet at the same time curious with what he was going to open up to her.

Untangling his arms from her warmth, he first took care of removing the jacket he wore. She turned to face him and was eager to ask questions but chose to remain silent. As he placed the jacket on top of his bag, he removed the glove that shielded her from fully seeing the lack of flesh on his left hand and instead was greeted with metal.

Y/N lets out a loud gasp as she looks down on the prosthetic arm Bucky had. As her gaze shifted from his hand to his eyes, the super soldier could see how her face wrinkled not in pity, but in worry and concern. What happened? Who did this to you? Did it hurt? Are you still in pain? Those were the four questions that were loitering her mind and Bucky somehow had the idea that those were the things that she had in mind.

“I don’t know if you know, but I was the Winter Soldier. HYDRA, an evil organization, brainwashed me and made me do their dirty work. When they found me, I had fallen off a ravine which made me lose my arm. They gave me a metal one, to make me stronger and more invincible I guess.” Even though he only provided her a summary of what he’s been through, he failed to realize how a few stray tears escaped his eyes. Dainty and delicate fingers wiped his tears away and he smiled at the action.

They both were silent for a few moments, the hundred year old man was bracing himself for the moment Y/N was going to bid him adieu, and he wouldn’t blame her for who would want someone with so much baggage? “You said it yourself, Bucky, you were brainwashed,” she soothed him as her hands settled on his stubbled cheeks and her touch was feather-like and was giving him comfort unlike any other, “That wasn’t what you wanted to do. They forced you to do it. I’m sorry that that happened to you, but you don’t need to let your past define how your future will turn out to be. You’re free now, you take control of your fate.”

She ended her statement by placing a warm kiss on his forehead; the action had Bucky smiling and looking at her sheepishly with crimson in his cheeks. “You’re too kind, doll,” he shyly responded to her assurance. “I meant every word, Bucky. You deserve to be happy,” she then hugged him tight, her smaller frame snuggling into his larger one. With the side of her face resting on his chest and his chin resting on the top of her head, she failed to see how Bucky was smiling widely as a thought and plan came into his mind. I will be happy, baby. Soon, with you.

Following their small heart-to-heart talk, they both went home just as the sun set — not before taking a few pictures of course, mostly of Y/N because Bucky loved how the combination of pink and yellow complimented her skin — so he wanted to take photographs to remind him of this lovely memory. And as they both went home, they bonded even more as they ate dinner.

The following day, however, they both didn’t get to spend as much time as Bucky would have wanted. She told him during breakfast how today she’ll try the pocket WiFi that was given to her. And in the process of doing so she would be having meetings with some of her co-workers. Instead of sulking around, the war veteran tended to his garden, harvesting the vegetables and plants that he deemed were already ready to be eaten, he also washed and dried his laundry, and cleaned Alpine’s litter box.

By the time he had done all his chores, it was already quarter to 5 pm when he settled on continuing to read the book on the porch with Alpine once again laying on his lap. Today’s heat had been more cruel than it was yesterday and with his lovely guest not knowing about the truth of his left arm, he traded the long sleeves for a tank top paired with basketball shorts. Just as he was reading about the climax of the novel, he heard the front door opening and footsteps approaching him, “Hey Bucky, how you doing?”

The mentioned man placed his book down on the table and turned to her with a smile, “Busied myself with housework. Are you done with your test and meetings?” He hoped that she was done with her work, he already missed spending time with her and he wondered that maybe this was what Alpine felt like whenever she wanted to be snuggling next to Bucky. “Yeah I’m done for today! And I was thinking that maybe I can cook something? Was there something you’d like to have for dinner?”

The cheeky part of him thought of telling her how he’d love to have her for dinner but decided he did not want to creep her out. “Surprise me with you culinary skills, doll,” he challenged her and he chuckled with how she responded, “You bet! I’ll make a meal that will make you forget your name with how good it is!”

Throughout the entire time that she made the meal, he kept her company and the conversation between the two flowed effortlessly. Every possible topic that they could talk about, you can bet that they talked about it. And even as they were both eating supper, they both shared more about their personal life. Bucky shared about how things were back in the 40’s and how he missed dancing.; while she shared more about her family and the different jobs she had.

One thing that Bucky was more than pleased to find out was that she was single and had not been dating anyone for a while. After dinner, Y/N found herself wanting to sleep right away due to exhaustion of her work-filled day. But before she did, she asked Bucky if it was alright for them to go back to the lake since she wanted to go for a swim, to which he replied with, “If it’ll make you happy, doll, then I’ll do it.” She masked the giddiness she felt by telling him goodnight and how she couldn’t wait to go.

As the super soldier laid down on his bed, he couldn’t prevent the goofy grin forming on his lips as he recalled how close he got with one of his guests. He never imagined how she could have made this impact on him in a short amount of time. Though he failed to bond with her for the majority of the day, he reassured himself that tomorrow — and possibly the next few days — they’d both get to make up for it. But there was something inside him that seemed too impatient to wait, and instead was extremely eager to start compensating for the time they failed to spend with each other.

Which led him to where he was right now; walking out of his bedroom as he strides with purpose and like a possessed man making his way to where the girl who plagued his mind currently was peacefully sleeping. Quietly, he opened the door just enough for him to take a peek to see if she was startled by the action even though Bucky did so with caution. Not noticing any movement or reaction, he opened the door wide enough to allow himself to enter and closed it as he welcomed himself in her room. Standing at the foot of the bed, he couldn’t help but admire her sleeping form; she was laying on her right side with her right hand pressed to her cheek and her left arm propped down on her waist. He noticed how the end of the blanket that was draped over was along the middle region of her thighs, exposing her lower legs.

He stood there, marveling at how peaceful and how pure she looked. He imagined himself snuggling her frame and providing her with warmth whenever the night got too chilly. Or how he wouldn’t mind her using his metal arm as her pillow as long as he got to run his fingers through her skin in an attempt to lull her to sleep. Or how he would whisper sweet nothings and words of assurance to her should she awake due to a nightmare.

The wholesome and loving thoughts he had took a different turn when her left hand unconsciously bunched up the sheets and moved it away from her body, which exposed her unclothed body to the hungry eyes of Bucky. She laid there with no clothing of any kind and the blanket — which was now pooling between her under boob and just below her navel — now barely concealed her body. His gaze was now roaming around her body and hungirly took in the view; her breasts looking as if it was the most delectable thing he’d ever seen with her gum drop nipples all stiff due to the wind, her luscious legs were just begging to be touched and worshiped, and her cunt, that though he couldn’t properly get an entire view of due to how she was facing the wall but from from where he stood he can see how pretty and enticing it was with how she chose to groom it.

One thing that he was more than grateful for is that her ass was fully exposed and should he choose to sit on the chair that was right across where she laid, he would have gotten a great view of it; and so he did. Sitting down on the chair, he found himself lowering the boxer shorts he wore that suddenly became too tight for his cock that hardened. “Fuck,” he hissed as he began to slowly stroke himself, teasing himself and wanting to savor the view that he had.

From slowly running his hand up and down his shaft, those strokes became fast as his mind was filled with images and scenarios of him taking Y/N in various ways.

“Fuck Bucky, harder,” she moaned as she felt Bucky’s grips on her hips tighten before he controlled her body to match his thrusts, moving her along as he slid in and out of her as a response to her plea. Wanting to feel more of her, one of his hands left her hips to grip her shoulder and pull her to him so her back was pressed against his sweaty chest; to keep her steady and against his chest, the hand on her shoulder detached from her shoulder and moved to hold on to her breast, pulling and tugging on the swollen nipple.

“That what you want, baby girl? Need me to fuck you hard?” He teased her as her whines increased at the assault he was doing to her. She just nodded her head rapidly, but that wasn’t enough for Bucky, he let go of her breast and slapped both of them hard enough to elicit a reaction out of her, “I wanna hear you say it! Say you like getting fucked hard like a slut!”

“I love it! I love how you’re fucking me like a slut, Bucky!” she moaned out loud and found herself hooking her hand to his hand that wasn’t on her hip. The man simply smirked at how much of a wreck she was and he loved it. She guided his hand to her neck and his smirk became even more sinister and he let her know his appreciation, “Yeah you’re just a filthy girl aren’t you,” his grip on her neck tightened and he felt her tighten and got the hint that she was close, “And since I love my filthy girl, why don’t you come for me?”

Bucky knew he was nearing his climax, but he decided that the visual wasn’t enough for him; he needed the actual thing. Completely undressing himself, he walked towards where she was laying and turned her gently so she now laid on her back. “Goddamn you’re beautiful, baby,” he whispered as he kneeled on the bed and his knees were on the sides of her body. He stretched her left leg to the outside of his right knee, her inner thigh grazing his knee. While he lifted her right leg and let it rest on his shoulder.

Rubbing his right hand on her clit, he felt how wet she already was and slid a finger in, moving his finger around, he took note of how she was completely drenched. “I guess you pleasured yourself before sleeping huh?” Pulling his finger out and bringing it to his lips, his suspicion was confirmed as he tasted her sweet juices.

“This’ll be easier then,” he sighed as he pushed his cock in and slid in one swift motion thanks to her juices. He stared off with slow and long thrusts, checking to see if she’ll wake up — thankfully she didn’t. He then took this as his queue to give her harder thrusts, pulling out until his tip lightly brushes the opening of her tight canal and pushing all the way in with force until his balls were pressed tightly against her ass.

“Can’t wait for you to enjoy this when you’re awake doll,” Bucky rasped out in between his thrusts, which were now slowly becoming faster. The speed of his hips were causing the bed to shake and he feared that if it weren’t for his actions, then maybe the sound of the bed hitting the wall would cause her to regain consciousness. But she was so deep in her slumber that she didn’t.

“Gonna cum, gonna cum inside of you. Will mix my juices with yours,” Bucky moaned lowly. And he felt his climax nearing that his judgement was clouded and his sole focus was to let himself go. So he moved around in the bed until his feet hit the floor and spread her both legs wide open to the sides, all without pulling himself out.

Placing his hands on both her inner thighs, he pressed them down and didn’t hold back as he slammed his cock in and out of her pussy. His pelvis met her thighs with each thrust, his hands tightly holding on to her thighs which somehow made her clench down on him even more, his eyes hungrily taking in the sight of her breasts bouncing along with the power of his hips, and the tip of the iceberg was when she began letting out small and quiet whimpers.

“Shit, you’re squeezing me so well baby,” he breathed out as he slammed himself inside her and stayed planted in here as he felt himself release his load. Head thrown back and panting loudly, she whimpered a little and was clenching her pussy which milked even more of Bucky’s seed. She must be dreaming of someone fucking her, God I hope it’s me she’s thinking about, Bucky thought as he pulled his cock out until only the tip was inside her; he stroked the part of his cock that wasn’t inside her, making sure that every last drop of his seed didn’t drip into the bed and was instead all inside her.

After taking a few minutes to recover, he pulled out completely and positioned her in the bed prior to how she was before he came in. He grabbed his discarded boxers and put them on him. Before walking out of the room he went back to the bed, leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead, “Can’t wait to swim with you baby girl.”

Arising from her sleep, Y/N stretched her body and rubbed the sleepiness off her eyes. She couldn’t help but grin at the memories of how she pleasured herself before she drifted off to dreamland and when she did, her subconscious was somehow able to project a scenario wherein she was getting railed by Bucky. The mention of his name in her mind had her blushing; she brought her fingers down to her pussy to inspect the aftermath of her masturbation and was surprised to see how wet she was and how much she orgasmed.

Before making her way down to greet her host, she first dressed up in her bikini, however she didn’t want to walk down right away only with the flimsy pair, so she wore a tank top and a pair of shorts on top of the swimwear. Making her way down the stairs, she saw Bucky relaxing on the couch and was on his phone, “Good morning, Bucky. Did you sleep well?”

She plopped herself down at the armchair opposite where Bucky was sitting, and the metal-armed man fumbled to pocket his phone and turn his attention to the girl who warmly greeted him. “I slept peacefully, doll. Where are you headed all dressed up like that?”

“I was hoping we could have brunch by the lake? And then swim afterwards?” She shyly suggested and it was adorable for the veteran to see her all shy and flustered, he didn’t have it in him to reject her idea. “That’s a great idea, doll! I’ve already prepared some food that I can just pack up in tupperwares,” just as he was about to head to the kitchen to do so she stood quickly and told him, “I can do it! My bag’s all ready and I’m dressed up so I can do all those while you get ready.”

He smiled and thanked her for volunteering, he let her know where the tupperwares and picnic baskets were before heading up to change. As he was changing in his room into a navy tank top along with a pair of shorts, he decided that today was the day. He was gonna make his move and let him know that he wants her here with him.

The drive to the lake had been peaceful; Bucky offered to drive and she accepted so she was left to admire the scenery as they both traveled to their destination. Once Y/N caught a glimpse of the lake, she had already been fumbling to unbuckle her seatbelt and before Bucky had fully parked the car, the front passenger door was already being opened and the woman beside him carried her bag as she excitedly ran towards the dock.

“You’re gonna hurt yourself, doll! Be careful!” He called out to her as he switched off the engine and moved to grab the picnic basket at the backseat. Catching up to where she was standing near the edge of the dock, she turned to him and smiled, “I’m sorry, I just get really excited when I see the water. Plus, it’s been forever since I got to swim,” her exaggeration in the apology had him chuckling and he simply put the basket down and took out the blanket he had and laid it out.

Kneeling down, Bucky then rummaged through the items on the basket, “What do you wanna eat, doll? Want to have some muffins? I also have some bacon if you want,” he looked up to see that his lovely doll was stripping off her top and bottoms, with her back facing him. She folded her clothes and placed it on top of her bag, she turned to him and smiled, “I don’t wanna eat, I want to swim first.”

The super soldier barely got to process the words that left her mouth as he was admiring the swimsuit she was wearing, “That’s a pretty bikini you have there, doll,” he mindlessly blurted out. She blushed at the praise and he noticed as well how she rubbed her luscious thighs and it got him thinking that maybe she had a praise kink. “It’s one of the eight swimsuits they sent me,” was all she said before she waived and ran towards the end of the dock and jumped as she splashed down on the lake.

Fuck, one of eight swimsuits? She’s trying to kill me. He thought to himself as he felt his cock start to harden at the thought of seeing her in her swimwear and possibly railing her as she wears it. But first, he thought he had to eat up before making those plans and desires come true.

Y/N was having fun just swimming around. The lake had clear and clean water. She was able to see her feet and the sandy floor through the water. The lack of seaweeds and other aquatic plants on the lake was something she was thankful for since she loathed swimming around and feeling something grazing her leg.

Quite some time had already passed since Y/N began swimming and Bucky was just sitting there as he ate and was staring at her every movement. “Come join me, Bucky! The water’s not too cold, it’s perfect!” he smiled and put the muffin he was munching on down and moved to take his shirt off.

Her mouth hung agape and a little bit of drool came out of her mouth as she gazed on the man’s body. He was toned and defined; her fingers ached to run it through his wide chest and shoulders and she would have also loved to feel his bulging arms wrapped around her. She was snapped out of her thoughts as she heard a big splash and felt the water moving against her.

“Hi there, beautiful,” having this Adonis of a man face her and greet her sweetly had her giggling. “Good for you to join me; was starting to think you didn’t know how to swim that’s why you didn’t wanna join me,” her accusation had him gasping and feigning hurt. “You really think that lowly of me, doll?”

Y/N swam away from Bucky, creating some distance between them; this had the man tilting his head to the side in curiosity. “Don’t tell me you’re easily hurt by that! I wonder what happens if I challenge you to a splash fight?” Just as she said that she began to flick her wrists to splash some water in Bucky’s direction.

They both were giggling as they both began to soak each other with water. After a while they both stopped and Y/N let her arms float on the water as she stared at the man adoringly; while he thought that it was finally time to speed things up. Swimming towards her, he erased the distance between them and held both her hands against his chest. He felt her breath quicken and she was staring at him with wide and inquisitive eyes.

Lifting both her wrists, he placed a long and sensual kiss on the insides of her wrists. A sharp intake of breath was heard from her lips and he rested her forearms on his shoulders as his flesh hand pulled her closer to him by the hips while his metal hand gently caressed her cheek, “Had your fun already, baby girl?”

With a flushed face she nodded and pursed her lips together, “Don’t do that princess, that’s my job,” Bucky reprimanded her as he brushed his metal thumb in her lips but quickly moved the hand towards the nape of her neck and pulled her close for their lips to collide. He swallowed her whimper of shock and took the opportunity to let his tongue inside her mouth.

Slanting his head, he deepened the kiss as his flesh hand moved to wrap her thigh around his hips in order to get their bodies as close as possible and to feel every inch of her. Bucky smirked as he felt her tongue dancing along with the direction of his tongue and when he felt her hands cup his cheeks he couldn’t hold himself back from placing both his hands to grab her bikini-covered bum and grind her core to his.

“Oh God,” she whimpered against his lips, as if she was starting to pull away; but Bucky didn’t want her to do so, so he chased her lips with his and planted it firmly against her, leaving her no room but to comply with what he wanted.

Her hands traveled down from his cheeks to his neck and down to his shoulders, where she anchored herself to separate her tongue from roaming around his mouth. Her chest was heaving up and down as she stared down at Bucky who was loving this out of breath and dazed state she was in, “What was that?”

Her question made him chuckle darkly before teasing her, “That was just a preview of what’s to come, baby,” this just confused her even more and she tilted her head but he simply removed his hands from her body and she whined at the loss of contact — which Bucky thought as completely adorable — but he kissed her forehead, “Enjoy your swim doll, a few more minutes then we go home, got it?” She nodded and watched as he swam his way to the docks and busied himself with drying himself up and packing up their picnic.

She shrugged off the million thoughts racing through her head and decided that swimming would probably help her clear her head.

Something in the air shifted as they both were driving home after spending nearly two hours by the lake. While keeping his eyes on the road, Bucky’s metal hand was on the steering wheel while his flesh hand was gripping and caressing Y/N’s thighs. He loved how she didn’t flinch when he did so and instead she enveloped his hand with both her thighs.

Upon arriving back at the home, Bucky opened the car door for her and she smiled and thanked him. As he went to retrieve the picnic basket, his doll went ahead to get inside the house and it was finally time for him to make his move.

Placing the basket down on the floor without a care, he grabbed her hand as she was headed for the stairs; her bag falling off her shoulders as a result. “Bucky,” she was cut off as Bucky planted his lips against her and pulled her by the hips to feel her skin against his. She moaned out loud and he smirked as he once again let his tongue inside her and began to roam her insides and massaged her tongue with his.

“I fucking need you, baby,” he rasped out without fully disconnecting his lips from hers, “You gonna let me have you?” she whimpered and simply nodded. This made Bucky happy, and to show his appreciation, he kissed her neck and her collarbones as his hands quickly ripped the material of her shirt against her. A loud gasp was let out, and it informed the man who was vigorously kissing her that she was turned on with what he did.

Placing his hands behind her hips, he guided her walk with him to the couch with his lips still attached to her hot skin. They both worked to remove her of her shorts before Bucky was pushing her to sit down on the couch. “Don’t take your bra off, remove those panties, I wanna see your ass,” he commanded as his eyes roamed around her body as he took his shirt and shorts off, revealing that he didn’t have any underwear on.

“Press your cheek against the sofa and put your ass up in the air for me, princess,” he groaned upon seeing her full ass on display. He smacked both her cheeks at the same time and chuckled as she shook her ass in response. One hand had a firm grip on her hip while the other stroked his cock and teased the tip on her clit. “You ready, baby? Want to feel my cock inside you?”

She nodded, “Yes please, Bucky, I need to feel you push your cock inside me,” by the end of her whining he had already slid inside her and pushed it all the way until she felt his balls slap against her ass. She let out a dragged moan as he let out profanities and praises about how she enveloped him well.

Pulling his hips back, he thrust right back in which made her moan once again. His other hand was now teasing her clit by rubbing it and he felt her coat his cock with more of her juices. “God, you feel like heaven, princess. Wrapping your tight pussy around me so good,” he threw his head back but his hips were doing the opposite. His pelvis was slamming deep and fast against her that her ass was feeling the friction of his trimmed pubic hair.

“It’s so good, Bucky. Love how you’re pounding me,” the praise and small amount of dirty talk was enough for Bucky to groan and drive his hips even deeper and stronger, if that was even possible. “Fuck you’re so dirty, doll. My dirty doll, right?” he asked as he wrapped a handful of her hair against him and pulled her against him; her back against his chest and he could her chest heaving as she struggled to catch her breath.

Untying her bra, he tossed it on the floor and both his hands began to twist, pinch, pull, and flick on her nipples. Palming her breasts, he continued to spur him on with his words, “Who knew how much of a filthy princess you were huh? That you were really a slut wanting to get fucked?” she whined out loud and this prompted Bucky to sit down on the couch and drag her with him; ending up in a position that would allow her to ride him. “Ride me, bitch. Ride me ‘til we both cum,” he was surprised with how she eagerly responded to his command.

She leaned back and planted her hands on his abs and began to lift her body up and down, moving her pussy in and out of his cock. With one hand resting at the back of his head, the other was slapping her ass that was bouncing up and down on him. “Only a slut like yourself knows how to ride a cock this good, baby,” his statement ended with a groan as she stopped her bouncing and was instead sitting with his cock fully inside her, and she began to move in slow and hard circles. As if she was grinding on his dick.

“God, I’m so close, you got me near my edge, slut,” Bucky groaned and slapped both her ass cheeks at the same time, “Face me, baby. Turn around and face me, without leaving my cock.” He grinned as she halted her movements and twisted her body so she was greeted with the sight of Bucky’s chest sweaty and a smirk planted on his lips.

He sat up from his lying position and sat up so their chest were pressed firmly against each other, “Are you close, baby?” She threw her head back and nodded as Bucky began to move his hips so he could match the way she was sliding up and down his cock. Slapping her cheek, not too hard but enough to get her to look at him, he growled, “Tell me, princess. Tell me you’re close and that you wanna cum.”

Her mouth opened but a moan came out of her, he gave her a particularly harsh thrust and she finally gave in, “I wanna cum, Bucky, I need to. Please let me cum on your cock.” He smirked, satisfied with her answer and took control of the tempo of the way she was riding him. Holding on hard enough on her hips, enough to leave marks, he began to lift her up and down on him; he was lifting her up so fast that she barely had time to breathe and the way he slammed her was so hard he could hear their skin slapping against each other.

“You’re squeezing my cock so good, baby” Bucky groaned and he felt how close she was but needed added stimulation to let herself go. He lowered his mouth to cover her nipple with his lips; the sensation of licking and sucking hard on her nipple coupled with the cruel hip thrusts he was giving into her was enough for Y/N to grip on his shoulders and plant her lips on the top of his head, “Bucky, fuck,” was all she was able to let out as a warning for the orgasm that washed over her.

After feeling her juices drip down, there was something primal in him that made him more determined than ever to blow his load; so he removed his mouth from her nipple and laid her down on her back and moved to lift her legs, phishing them to her chest. “You gonna take my cum, baby? Gonna let me put it all in you?” He was thrusting violently, there was no rhythm but just him ruthlessly sliding his cock in and out of her tight canal, his mind was filled with images of her staying here with him, building a life together.

“Bucky, I’m so sensitive,” she squealed, and the man just smirked and to her surprise she just slammed his hips faster. He looks beautiful like this, she thought, but there was a part of her that thought she might explode if he continued his brutal assault on her body; and she was starting to get sleepy. Bucky slammed his cock all the way in until his balls were against her ass and stayed there, “Fuck, you’re such a good girl,” he moaned as he emptied his balls and shoved all his cream inside her.

He looked down on his precious angel and smiled at the sight of her with her eyes closed, running a finger to her face, just admiring her post-sex glow and the way she was all sweaty. He leaned down to kiss her on the forehead, “You did so well for me, baby.”

Without removing his cock from her, he moved to carry her, with ease he then brought both of them upstairs and into his room. Upon entering, he saw that Alpine was still lazily sleeping on the bed he got her and smiled, “I got you a mommy already, Al,” he whispered and felt himself harden again at the nickname he’d given the lovely girl in his arms.

Laying the both down, he wrapped both his arms around the sleeping beauty beside him and kissed her lips once more, “Welcome home, doll.”

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tarysande · 4 years

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It’s the Dose that Makes the Poison: Lucifer Thoughts and Speculation

I’m going to throw the entirety of this under a cut because spoilers. I’ve been rearranging the pieces on the table and I have some meta and a plausible(?) theory about how things might shake out.

...this is almost four thousand words long, and frankly? I feel I’ve barely grazed the surface.

Also, I put it on AO3 for ease of reading and/or in case anyone wants to have, idk, threaded conversations ;D

Okay. Here are a bunch of the pieces. (Or the piece is here, as it were.)

First: The show has always been about redemption; the showrunners throw that word around all the time. Second: I don’t think we’re going to see an endgame or a narrative where God is evil. So, how to make the concept of literal Hell work, then? How to explain or justify the idea of a father who a) kicked his kid out of the house and sent him to Hell for-literal-ever and b) created children for specific “of God” purposes.

Hell

In 5x01, Lee says, “Whose Hell is this, anyway?” and ... I think that’s the crux of the matter. In S3, Lucifer realizes he gave himself the face of a monster because he felt monstrous. But the truth is, he didn’t just give himself the face.

He gave himself the place, too. 5x01 is littered with clues that indicate this. Lucifer says “you to your torture and me to mine.” Lee’s entire speech—the one that pushes all Lucifer’s buttons because of course Lucifer’s projecting all over Lee’s “worst memory”—might as well be Lucifer talking to himself (not unlike Uriel in Lucifer’s hell loop). You know, the part of Lucifer that’s starting to understand all the psychological stuff Linda’s been yammering on about.

Lucifer created Hell. To torture himself for what he believes he did. He created the mechanism that you can walk out any time you like—but no one ever does. None of the doors are locked, right?

On some level, Lucifer, who is all about fairness and justice, looked at what he did and decided the Hell as we’ve seen it was the appropriate punishment. And with Lee, Lucifer almost figures out that the goal of “Hell” isn’t to eternally loop through guilt-fueled self-torture but to forgive yourself and apologize or make amends or not repeat the mistakes. Most of all, learn that nothing changes if you stay in the loop and the only way to break the loop is to take risk that you might fuck up and do something that you feel guilty for again.

Names/Family

Something that’s always jumped out at me is that no matter how many millennia have passed, Lucifer—to whom nicknames and names are canonically really goddamned important—always refers to his family by their familial connection to him “brother, sister, Mum, Dad.” When he banished himself from Heaven—and I’m starting to think he did—he didn’t stop feeling like he was a part of his family. Even when he wanted to eat Amenadiel’s heart someday, he still called him “brother.” Even when Uriel was threatening Chloe (and Mum), he was still “brother.”

For that matter, isn’t it interesting that all Lucifer’s estranged siblings refer to him by the name he chose for himself—not the one he was given? Except, of course, when they want to hurt him. We’ve known since what, S1? That Lucifer cannot abide the name Samael. Even Uriel calls him Lucifer. Or Luci. Mum calls him Lucifer. Lucifer was given Poison of God and he chose Bringer of Light. And everyone who loved (and loves) him said, “All right. Lucifer it is.” And though Lucifer is originally a little eye-rolly with nicknames—Luce, Luci—it’s fond, not the “I’m going to rip out your spine and beat you to death with it” response Samael elicits. Essentially, Samael is Lucifer’s deadname. And people who use intentionally are dismissing and rejecting the identity Lucifer chose, which is vile.

When I was researching/writing Taking the Fall and I knew I wanted to talk about the name thing, I came across this quotation ascribed to Paracelsus, and it really resonated: “All things are poison, and nothing is without poison, the dosage alone makes it so a thing is not a poison.” The dosage, in fact, is the difference between whether something is a poison or a cure. And if that doesn’t align with the themes of the show, I don’t know what does.

Lucifer has spent all this time thinking he is a poison; he has never imagined that he might be a cure. (To angels embracing their free will; to ending the sharp black and white segregation between Heaven and Hell; to darkness, to fear. Yet the more Lucifer learns and the healthier he gets, the more we see cures in what he does: i.e., Brody and also, you know, solving crimes.)

Michael, on the other hand, means “Who is like God?” It’s meant to be a rhetorical question, but in the universe of the show, I think Michael’s twisted version is that he used the question “Who is like God?” to plant the seed of Lucifer’s rebellion ... and is now answering the question “Who is like God?” with the reply, “I am."

Maze

But just in case we head too far down the Lucifer is Great line of thinking, we’ve got a big old example of how he’s still a poison, too.

Contrast this discussion of family with the lesson Lucifer still needs to learn about Maze—he’s managed to absorb that she’s not his servant anymore, but he’s still clinging to that soulless demon/just a demon dismissiveness. And despite self-worth coming from within, bitches, Maze still hasn’t truly absorbed that. She still looks outside for validation—and resents or backslides when she doesn’t get it. Especially from Lucifer. Because Lucifer was the first being to treat her like she mattered. She admires him. Looks up to him. Loves him. In many ways, Maze is the shadow of Chloe—drawn to Lucifer but never, from his perspective, his equal or his partner.

And he, for all the strides he’s made, still default to “demon” as derogatory and dismissive. Something she can’t transcend, even though all the evidence suggests the contrary. As long as Lucifer sees Maze as just a demon, she can’t truly escape from that identity.

Why does Maze keep “betraying” Lucifer? It’s tempting to think it’s because she’s a demon. Because she doesn’t have “a soul.” But that’s not true. She can learn; she learns from “betraying” Chloe and doesn’t do it a second time. She learns from “betraying” Linda and Trixie. Even she and Amenadiel seem to have reached a real (and much more healthy) understanding of who they are to each other.

She keeps betraying Lucifer because he keeps deserving it.

Servants

The thing is, I think there’s something important in Lucifer’s “You’re not my servant anymore” to Maze. Because I think angels believe they are God’s servants. And I suspect the reason God’s been so AFK is because he really wanted them to ... break free of that. On their own. Without him telling them to—because if he told them, it wouldn’t be choice anymore. It wouldn’t be free will. It would be Following The Will of DadGod.

Here’s another relevant Paracelsus quotation: “No one who can stand alone by himself should be the servant of another.”

Angels self-actualize. They have powers. Sometimes those powers change (as with Amenadiel). I don’t think angels ever lacked free will.

What is self-actualization but literal free will? You become what you believe you are; you do what you think you’re supposed to. You literally change based on your choices and feelings about those choices. Angels basically have human free will on a kind of EXTREME SCALE that they’ve remained mostly ignorant of throughout time. But how do you get your kids to figure something out without telling them how to figure it out when they’ve all got this WILL OF DAD complex? He gave them the tool of self-actualization. When they didn’t ... do that, he created humanity. He tinkered with the model. Took away the names and the powers that were such a stumbling block for his angels and such a shining example of how he failed them. If someone hangs on your every word, if you are not just their father but their master, how can they ever know love? Trust? How can they ever be free? Be themselves? I think God wanted his angel children to learn from his human children and was disappointed when they pretty much decided to just be remote and Angelically Superior All The Time, instead. Of course, that's mostly on him, too.

Except Lucifer. Because Lucifer’s curiosity (yes, from the beginning of time) kept bringing him so close to figuring things out. (Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven, amirite, Paradise Lost?) And as close as he was to figuring things out, Lucifer was still prideful and selfish and superior. The result was what happened with (and in) Hell. Things got twisted down there; he was in a God role over the demons and he was not hands-off. Cue endless loops of pain and torture and despair and self-recrimination and poison. Lilith may have started their pain, but Lucifer, however unintentionally or ignorantly, continued it.

At least Lucifer could escape it sometimes. Those poor demons. Those poor abandoned children. They had two rocks.

Pretty sure there’s going to be an echo of Dad abandonment with his angel kids and Lilith of her demon kids, by the by. Because abandonment is a theme. And good intentions or not, well, you know what they say about the road to Hell.

Humanity The more Lucifer interacted with humanity, the more he learned from humanity. And, of course, the entire journey of the series has been about Lucifer learning, growing, adapting, changing because of this. And not in a Superior Angelic Way, but in a person-to-person real way. Not just with Chloe. With everyone. But yeah, Chloe is the catalyst—precisely because (as Amenadiel says) she’s the only mortal who sees Lucifer for who he really is, without her reflected desires getting in the way. No one, no one else can truly reflect back to him his worthiness or lack thereof.

Does Chloe have a power? It’s not laser-beam hands. But I’ve always thought Chloe has the power of seeing things and, in seeing, encouraging others to see, too. And this is most obvious with Lucifer, whose power has never let him be seen. Because of his power, he can never know if the reactions of others are about him or about their own desires.

What agony for someone whose chosen path is bringing light: to be forever hidden in the shadow of the light others see.

Until Chloe.

Michael tells Lucifer his greatest fear is that of being unworthy. We know Lucifer has always feared he’s not worthy of Chloe. But now that she’s told him, shown him, his worthiness? You’d better believe that he will never, ever abandon her—will never, ever let her suffer from her worst fear. Gosh, and by suddenly being invulnerable again, it’s almost like he’s assured that, isn’t it? “You make me vulnerable” was about his walls. “My invulnerability ensures I will never, ever abandon you,” is all about hers.

So, back to learning from humanity. We’ve seen Lucifer and Amenadiel do it. It’s been hinted that Azrael has done it, at least a little. Then we have Michael’s frustrated tale of how the other angel siblings are taking note of Lucifer’s actions—with the implication being that maybe they’re learning, too. Maybe they’re starting to understand that they can be more than they think they have been made to be. More than just a “Something” of God.

Control

Meanwhile, of course, Michael’s concocted some kind of Make Heaven Great Again plot—ironically, it appears, by doing exactly what he accused Lucifer of doing: believing he can run things better than Dad. And, I suspect, by trying to set himself as Master and his siblings (and other assorted peons) as his servants. Only, he’s not doing it in Lucifer’s ultimately forthright (and even honest) way of “This sucks and I’m rebelling” but in a conniving, secretive, Machiavellian way that probably sounds a lot like “Dad says” or “Dad’s not here” or “Who is closer to God than I?” ...

Who is like God, indeed. He even throws down the word archangel when he speaks to Dan: an angel above even other angels. I’m 99% sure that word’s never been used before on the show. Because that’s what Michael desires. To be more. To be everything. To control.

He’s what Lucifer was as the Lord of Hell. He’s everything Lucifer has made such progress toward overcoming.

Incidentally, and also essay-worthy: This is why the progression of the scene where Lucifer and Chloe make love is so incredibly (heh) important: Lucifer of the perfect appearance, perfect pocket square, perfect car, perfectly clean apartment; Lucifer of control control control control ... surrenders. He offers. She accepts. And in these first moments—“Incredible,” he breathes before they’ve done anything more than kiss—she is above him, in control ... and nothing bad happens. Nothing hurts him even though she makes him hurt-able. She doesn’t take advantage of him. She loves him; she treasures him; she protects him. It’s beautiful. It’s everything he’s been so afraid he could never have.

And for the first time (very possibly) ever, he sees himself as worthy. He sees himself as belonging. He believes he is not alone; he is not lonely.

Power

Amenadiel “lost” his power to stop time when he decided he didn’t want to stand apart from humanity anymore. Essentially, just as he lost his wings when he was so horrified and disgusted by what he’d done (to Lucifer, with Malcolm, etc.) he caused himself to Fall. He regained his wings when he made it his purpose to bring Charlotte to Heaven. He stopped time again in S5 when the question of humanity—of his own child being human, and thus ‘not like him’ or ... not that ‘special’—reared its head. With the nuns, he reflects their love of God, right? And in part, that’s because he’s in this father (or Father) role now.

Angel powers, like all power really, are double-edged. In the wrong hands or twisted the wrong way, a good power can bring about evil. Look at the almost throwaway line with Brody in 5x02: Lucifer’s “desire” power—so often spun as about sin or hedonism—brought Brody peace and forgiveness. That Lucifer doesn’t lie or take without giving in return indicates that, on some level, the level that values true justice—and even a bit of mercy—he was never able to use that power against others (the way we see Michael do with his); he didn’t want to use as he felt he’d been used; he also didn’t want to feel used by those whose desires he provided (this is why the parade of one-night stands and “it was just sex—great sex, but just sex” partners upset him so much back in S2). Favors—and even the give and take of sex—were a way to balance that scale. Again, this could be a whole essay all its own.

This makes me suspect that the dark side of Lucifer’s powers played some part in his Rebellion. That he abused desire the way we’ve seen Michael abuse fear.

So, about that power of fear, then. I mean, it just sounds negative. How can FEAR be positive, right? But if Michael were using his powers to draw out fears so they’re named and dealt with (LIKE PEOPLE DO IN THERAPY???) instead of manipulated for personal gain—it could be a very healing power (LIKE THERAPY???).

Greatest Strength/Greatest Weakness

The absolute thematic and narrative brilliance of twin brothers having the powers of fear and desire whilst also being held back BY the “power” of their twin is so amazing it really needs its own essay. But I do want to mention this relative to the overall arc heading forward. Much of Lucifer’s work with Linda has been about addressing his fears; he’s made a ton of progress with this. As I mentioned earlier, with Linda’s guidance, Lucifer has been drawing out his fears in a safe(r) space and learning to deal with them and heal. And, in doing so, his own power of reflecting desire has increasingly been less and less about artisanal honey and car batteries and more about drawing out desires that help others heal, grow, become their best selves, release their inner demons.

Michael is (both literally and figuratively) twisted by his desires (to be powerful, to be stronger/better/more admired than his brother). I’ll bet some cold hard cash that if Lucifer’s the source of the original injury to his shoulder/wing, Michael has self-actualized into keeping that injury—perhaps even magnifying it—to a) manipulate others into feeling sorry for him, b) to remind everyone who looks at him how awful Lucifer is, and c) to trick people into believing he’s weaker than he is.

At the end of the day, fear and desire are two of the strongest motivating forces in the world (universe); the show is showing us all the messy ways those forces come into play. And it’s also showing how connection and love and trust are the forces that both fight the worse facets of these powers and that let these forces be useful in helpful and ultimately healing ways.

Because THERAPY.

Home

So, we know we’re rolling toward what was meant to be a series finale; it’s time to start tying loose ends together, right? Again and again, the question of home comes up. Lucifer only ever refers to Los Angeles as his home. Maze, on the other hand, still defaults to Hell as home.

Hell as we know it is over. But Hell as a place where Maze tries to impart the lessons she’s learned on Earth to her abandoned, twisted-by-hate-and-loneliness-and-Lilith siblings? Perhaps even with Eve “mother of all humanity” at her side to help clean up some of the mess Lilith made when she decided to abandon connection in favor of more selfish desire? I think that’s plausible, while also managing a significant nod at where Mazikeen ends up in the comics and a heavy dash of “the things we learn from therapy and/or being best friends with a therapist.”

Now, I know the question of how things will end for Chloe and Lucifer is contentious in fandom. So, you know, grain of salt. I don’t think Lucifer’s home is Los Angeles; the Los Angeles in Hell wasn’t enough because it didn’t have her in it. In a literal embodiment of “Home is where the heart is,” Lucifer’s home is with Chloe. And since Chloe’s worst fear is abandonment, Lucifer will do what it takes to stay with her—because that’s what’s most important to him. The utterly unselfish choice. I think there’s some pretty reasonable foreshadowing (Lilith’s choice—if that choice was even real, of course—for example) that Lucifer may choose to renounce his immortality. Or to give it to someone else. Or that immortality won’t matter at all anymore.

From his reactions in 5x07/08, we know that Lucifer’s identity and ideas of usefulness/self-worth/worthiness of love are still connected to his identity as an immortal with powers; I think, though, he’s beginning to piece together the complications therein, especially regarding questions of partnership and vulnerability and equality.

Personally, Human!Lucifer has never been my preferred outcome, but I can see how it might work/might be what they’re heading for. Even if I’d still prefer the “you can use me as a bullet shield” partnership with supernatural elements—because those have always been at the heart of their partnership. The strengths of one make up for the weaknesses in the other (and vice versa).

Hell (Redux)

Finally, I’m still pretty sure we’re going to see a complete overhaul of the Heaven/Hell dichotomy. One with a lot less THIS IS THE WAY IT IS BECAUSE CONTROL and a lot more CHOICES MATTER (maybe Linda can have a turn as a salamander after all). And a major catalyst, of course, is Lucifer and his love for the chosen family on earth (and through them, a renewed love for the estranged family he’s never actually stopped loving; 5x01 basically makes canon that it's not that Lucifer hates his family—it's that he's terrified of disappointing them again, of causing problems again).

So why does Hell have to change?

Because right now, every human he loves is sure they’re going to Hell. And after all the time and all these friendships, can you really see Lucifer being okay with that? Okay with Ella or Linda or Dan or Trixie tormenting themselves for all eternity? When he wasn’t even okay with Mr. Said Out Bitch doing so? When he gave this guy who he barely knows every opportunity to change his fate in ways he’s never done for any other tortured soul? Because they had a tenuous connection on earth?

Can you see him being okay with Chloe choosing Hell to be with him?

When it boils right down to it, Lucifer has learned to love others. And I think, especially given his revelations about self-loathing last season, that love isn’t going to let him be okay with or encourage the self-loathing in others. Love—selfless love, real love—is, in fact, the cure to the very concept of Hell.

And it’s also the cure to the very concept of Heaven, too.

How could Heaven ever be perfect if the people you love aren’t in it?

It can’t. It might be more silver and have fewer demons, but I don’t think it’s any less an eternal torture. Eve basically tells us as much.

So, on that note, I’ll leave you with another fine quotation from Paracelsus:

“When a man undertakes to create something, he establishes a new heaven, as it were, and from it the work that he desires to create flows into him... For such is the immensity of man that he is greater than heaven and earth.”

And that, I think, is going to be the takeaway. We create what we are; we choose what we create. And in the act of that creation, we choose whether we are the poison or the remedy. And if we make mistakes, slip up, hurt people, hurt ourselves—it’s not a Hell-sentence. It’s the dose that makes the poison. We learn, we grow, we apologize, we strive to make things better, we love and love and love and love, and we never stop striving to be the cure.

#lucifer morningstar #chloe decker #deckerstar #lucifer on netflix #lucifer meta #lucifer speculation #lucifer season 5 #lucifer s5 spoilers #who asked for 3K+ of meta speculation?#no one #but here it is #long text post #very very long text post #lucifer thoughts

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sarahjtv · 3 years

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BNHA Chapter 315 Quick Analysis: #GiveDekuTherapy2021

Ok, another chapter! And it’s a doozy that’s for sure. Man, the people on social media were NOT very happy with what happened and I understand why. Though, I think Horikoshi has bigger plans going on in his head. So, I’m not going to go screaming to him telling him how to tell his story. I personally still liked it a lot and have hopes for our lovely Lady Nagant.

Anyway, doing these smaller analyses actually do make my life easier since they consume less time. To give you an idea, the Spoiler Analyses I did before took 1+ hours to complete for me since I had so much to say and I had to constantly go back and forth with Tumblr and the leaks. At least here, everyone knows what’s going on and I can go off the official translations. TL;DR: Doing the Quick Analyses are easier and I think I’m going to stick with them. Onto the chapter:

It’s actually kind of good to know that not all of Overhaul’s screws are loose. He’s still ultimately thinking about the Boss and wanting to fix him, but he does still recognize Deku and is willing to ID him for Lady Nagant. Of course, he’s so eager to get to the Boss that he’s practically scolding Nagant for not holding up her part of the bargain yet.

Holy crap that Rifle can get swole. No pun intended, that thing on Lady Nagant’s elbow is massive. I guess this is what happens when she exchanges her accuracy for speed and power. It’s cool, but damn is it gnarly to look at. Looks like something out of a gorey horror manga.

But, Deku swings in and uses his new Quirk to speed blitz his way to push Overhaul out of the bullet’s way! What a badass! Deku using his brains is aways cool as hell to see. You love to see it, my dudes.

And we FINALLY get an explanation on the 3rd Holder’s Quirk: Fa Jin. It’s basically stores and releases kinetic energy that is built up through repeated motion. So here, Deku uses Fa Jin on his legs which is why he was kicking and squatting so much earlier. So, he used that energy to boost his speed + 45% of OFA + use of centrifugal force via swinging with Black Whip = Faux 100%! Deku is insane; the guy’s a madman and I love it!

After saving Overhaul, Deku tells Overhaul that they’ll talk later. It’s just one panel, but this implies that Deku really will try to at least have a conversation with Overhaul to understand him since he was unable to back in the Yakuza Raid Arc. So, we’ll see if Deku will help Overhaul go down a better path. Though, again, I really wouldn’t blame Deku if he chose not to given the horrors Overhaul has done in the past.

And then we have a beautiful double-page-spread of Deku using the last of his Fa Jin to pull a sickass Faux 100% Manchester Smash on Lady Nagant’s Rifle to break it. Horikoshi is really drawing straight fire at this point. You can even see close-ups of the raindrops at a few points. It’s so cool to see Deku go 100% again even though this one is a pseudo one. Not only is Deku powerful as hell, but he’s also not breaking his body too much this way. Though that’s gotta hurt for Nagant since that Rifle is a part of her body. Yeesh...

Now Lady Nagant can’t fight and her Air Walk stopped working for some reason (AFO?). As she falls, Deku grabs her hand and realizes that she still has the heart of a hero despite everything. Deku begs her to fight along side the good guys again. You can even see that small glimmer of light back in Deku’s eyes again. God, I love Deku. He really does try to understand and see the best in everyone. He did it with Bakugo, Shoto, Gentle Criminal, La Brava, and even Shigaraki. He has this way of reading people and getting to people’s hearts. That’s one of the main things that makes Deku a true hero.

And Lady Nagant agrees... Until AFO reveals that he (probably) used one of his Quirks to secretly plant a bomb in Lady Nagant to blow her up in case she turned on him. Man, fuck AFO. All my homies hate AFO. I want to burn this fucker alive and watch him suffer. What a despicable waste of air. Good thing we’re actually meant to hate him.

And Deku just watches Lady Nagant blow up right in front of him. This kid is screaming in horror and I’m positive he’s even more traumatized after this. Deku’s been though far too much over the past month alone and I really REALLY worry about his mental health at this point. I’d hate to see him break down emotionally, but I would be ok if he did because Deku deserves a good cry at this point. I want him to see some kind of therapist after all this is over. IDK if Horikoshi will let him, but at least before this series is over at least.

Then Hawks finally appears like I though he would! He uses his little feathers to catch Lady Nagant from falling further. Good on him for saving his senpai! And I’m glad this confirms that Hawks’ wings are growing back. They’re so cute and tiny! Hawks isn't Quirkless after all.

So, Lady Nagant’s probably not dead. I know people are pissed that she was basically used as a plot device for other characters, but even Horikoshi acknowledges that through AFO’s dialogue about Lady Nagant constantly being used as a tool. Horikioshi knows what he’s doing; it’s not like he’s getting rid of her just because. The man wouldn’t let a character like her, one given a LOT of important backstory and development, die just like that. I’m thinking that Deku’s probably going to force Overhaul to use his Quirk on Nagant to heal her if he can. And if he does, not only is Lady Nagant ok, but this could be that better path Overhaul could go down. All in all, I don’t think Lady Nagant is dead. I think Horikoshi has bigger plans for her. I really hope I’m right

Horikoshi writing his characters at this point:

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bakugohoex · 4 years

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chapter six ➺ foul enemies

pairing: pro hero katsuki bakugo x pro hero female reader

cw: language, manga spoilers, violence and some fluff

word count: 2200+

a/n: ummm i dont even know if this series is doing good because it literally gets no votes or reblogs compared to my one shots, i might discontinue it if this get’s nothing idk, i have it all planned out and i really like how it ends so hopefully i’ll continue it

summary: in which you and dabi get sent on your own little mission, his wariness of you leads to the threat of death and abuse of his own power, hurt and distressed of when the end point of this will be, bakugo is the last person you expected to bring comfort to you

chapter five | masterlist | chapter seven

↞ back to my hero academia masterlist

The days had been rough after the burning of the town, it had been everywhere. News reports scattered across the country and worst of all, both you and Toga had been spotted by witnesses. You had stayed in your room only coming out when needed but the feeling of guilt had rested around you. Even Bakugo had been quiet with you a shock from the loud mouth you had as a partner a mere week ago, but you knew if he had seen the scene, he would refuse to even look at you.

At night he would stick to his side not even asking to talk, it was silent between the two of you and after holding hands whilst watching the burning sky. Everything was eerie and a surrounding of hatred had come from everybody, it was as if the whole front were bipolar able to easily turn from one another.

You went to the meeting that Toga had told you about in the morning, your hero costume on and your mentality deteriorating but what else could you do. Sitting beside Bakugo who made no sound to acknowledge your presence Mr Compress was the first to speak.

“How are you?” He asked softly.

He almost seemed human, almost, “I’m okay.”

You smile out before Tomura spoke a loud, “Dabi and Y/n, you both need to get these things.”

He shoves the piece of paper into Dabi’s fingers, he looked a lot like his younger brother, and you knew if Endeavor wasn’t such a piece of shit at being a father. You and Dabi could’ve been friends, hell you both might even worked together but the look of disgust he had at the sound of going with you. You knew he was a villain at heart.

“Hurry up.” Dabi mutters walking out the door. You don’t say anything instead following timidly, the silence of your footsteps as you caught up to the boy with his now white hair.

You didn’t try to make conversation, too tired and too guilty too, instead you stayed in your thoughts, mindlessly following the man. “Put this on.” He chucks a hoodie at you; you didn’t speak obliging.

Before he himself put on a jacket that had a hood to cover his face, “I could just make them think we’re not there.” You mutter.

He looks back at you, grabbing the door handle whilst eyeing you up and down. “I don’t trust you.”

The simple words had too much meaning in them, you gave a soft sign before following him into the dark night, even with it being late afternoon, the sun was setting, and a warm hue of red littered the sky. It wasn’t more suffocating, but you didn’t care as you followed the man out of the alleyway.

“You look too suspicious.” He mutters at how wide of a gap there was between the two of you. He grabs your wrist before eloping his fingers between your own. It felt gross and wrong and you hated it, you gave a soft smile at the man, you could almost feel the staples that rode across his wrist, but you chose to ignore it.

You both walked along acting happily as he pointed out stuff but didn’t speak, it was an act that you wanted over and done with. “Stay here.” He mutters pushing you onto a bench.

“Wh…” You had looked up to meet his eye but instead.

He interrupts you moving his palm to your mouth, “Y/n, stay the fuck here.”

You knew in any situation you would’ve fought back but the lack of sleep and restlessness you had made you obey him. It wasn’t like he was being a dick 24/7, it was the lack of trust you both had with one another. You saw the two police men standing and talking to one of the ladies at the bakery a couple shops over.

It looked to be flirting and you were too lazy to hear the gossip, instead tightening the thread in the hoodie to make it encase your full head. You looked naked from bottom down wearing it, your thigh high boots covering you but you knew people were staring and you hated it.

You watched as he walked towards a convenience store, before hearing the shouts come from inside. He was not seriously stealing from a shop, was the petty crime what he really wanted to do. You watched him run out with a bag full of money and on cue the police that had been just a mere shops away spotted him.

The shop keeper ran out, phone in hand shouting about the robbery. Everybody’s eyes planted on Dabi and you could almost feel his smirk. Was this a test? You watched as Dabi ran and the police followed, it was too stupid of a thing to have done. It must be something to do with you, you felt something in the hoodie pocket as you stood up about to follow.

Unwrapping the folded paper you see the two words that made everything you said true, ‘Ruin her.’

You scoffed shoving the paper before running yourself, you used your quirk to lift yourself from the ground, moving the air beneath your fingers to make you more agile, before you caught up with Dabi and the police. He had been trapped in an alley and you knew that he could’ve easily escaped, his quirk would’ve made it easier.

Landing behind the three of them, the two police turned around as Dabi smirked the blue flashing from his fingertips. One eyed you up and down and you gave a disgusted face, “Ma’am this hasn’t got anything to do with you, leave.” One of the men said about to usher you away, his hand was moving to your shoulder and you wanted to kill him for it.

“Don’t fucking touch me.” You whisper bringing your fingers up and in an instant both the police flew into the buildings, “really, ruin her.”

You repeated the words, Dabi almost impressed but you knew it was fake, knew he was putting it on because he didn’t care either way. “Not my issue.”

The hold you hand on the men, almost suffocating them with how you moved the air out of their throats, “You’ll kill them y’know.” Dabi had moved behind you the money in hand, his lips brushed against your ear and the hatred you had for them all filled you up.

“Do you think I care?” You retort back, he puts his hands up.

“You better kill them quickly, I hear sirens.” He speaks walking out of the alleyway.

You couldn’t bring yourself to kill them, you couldn’t ruin another person’s life, you bashed there heads into the concrete before running out yourself. You saw Dabi walk into another alleyway and you were frustrated, you had been tormented with the murder and the front they felt nothing after each murder they committed.

You grabbed his arm making him stop, he cocked an eyebrow looking down at your much shorter frame. “What? Couldn’t kill them? Why am I not surprised, you’ll always be a little hero bitch.”

The words were filled with disgust, “I’m not.” You tried to defend yourself, tried to make it seem like you were on their side. But how could you when you felt so much emotion from the previous couple days killing.

“Are you not?” He grabs your wrist, pushing you onto the wall, his body encased your own. It felt disgusting, the way his other hands fingers rubbed against your cheek. You could almost feel the evil absorb into your face.

His hot breath fanned your face, and the proximity would be a moment for couples, but his hand gripping your wrist became tighter as he taunted you. “Y/n, you’ll never be one of us, even Bakugo has what it takes to be evil, and he’s been indoctrinated a lot more than you have.”

“I can do it.” You whisper but the feeling of soreness that erupted from your wrist made you re-think everything.

“Can you, really, I remember you from those years ago, and you were worthless back then and now you’ve somehow become even more worthless, god, how I wish I killed you back then?” He laughed it out, you wanted to use your quirk, you did but the use of your bounded hands between his hands made you stop. What good was using something when he was taunting you, he wouldn’t kill you. He wouldn’t.

“You were a little thing back then, vulnerable and innocent, I should’ve painted the forest red with you.” He seethed out before you felt his quirk on your wrist, the burning sensation making your skin become darker.

You screamed, your quirk activating as you made him stop using your mind. “You fucking bitch.” He grabs a hold of your jaw, clearly having been in his head made him even more angry, holding your jaw as tight as he could. You felt every anger and emotion he felt towards you in the mere seconds you were in his head.

“I’ll…” You couldn’t breath with how his other hand had moved to strangle you.

“It’s a waste of time.” He muttered, letting you go, the blood that had rushed to your head had made you infuriated, you had gotten over the murder and moved onto something more. Your hatred of the man, the way you wanted to carve out his name on his chest, gouge his eyes out and hear him scream filled your thoughts. You were foul enemies, and, in that moment, you realised what it meant to be evil and you were feeling it all.

You caught your breath, ignoring the man who had walked into the building where the front was. Looking down at your right-hand wrist, you saw the marks of fire around it, if he had done it for any longer, you’d have nothing, but bone left. Instead the blood gushing from it had made a layer of skin peel off, you didn’t even know how your throat and jaw looked but you didn’t care.

The thoughts of murdering them all at night filled you and you knew that if you were truly a villain at heart, you’d have done it in an instance. It took a couple minutes before you entered the building, seeing Toga playing a game and Bakugo with a drink in his hand there was no sight of Tomura who you assumed had gone on another late-night meeting.

He had gone out every night, but nobody had questioned it and whenever you went inside his head, it was nothing, he never even thought about the meeting. Not even a single name filled his head, it was an abyss of nothing. Bakugo noticed you and as you took the hoodie off with your left hand, he saw the blood and purple bruises around your throat.

“Y/n.” He whispers instantly standing up, he grabbed your arm seeing the seething blood flow out, your other arm having had the stab wound and the purple marks around your neck. He hated seeing you like this, so vulnerable but your eyes, your eyes were filled with joy. He would kill Dabi, already knowing it was him, he wanted to kill him, make him feel the pain you felt but as he looked up he saw something he didn’t expect.

You were almost smiling; he didn’t ask only taking the first aid kid and you into your shared room. He sat you down, bringing some ice to your neck. “Stop smiling, cry at least.”

“Why? I could’ve killed two more people today.” You smiled out; it was almost as if it wasn’t for sure.

“You didn’t though.” He grabs the bandages as he watched you laugh at your own thoughts.

You began to blabber on, “who knows when this will end, hell, let’s stay like this forever.”

He looked in utter horror at you, “Y/n, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Before you can speak, he continues, “don’t fucking say shit like that, be emotional, be the girl I know you as.”

The words brought comfort to you and in an instant the tears welded out your eyes, “Dabi did this.” He nods already knowing, “I hate it here.” You whisper, he brings your knuckles in his arm, your freshly wrapped wrist encased perfectly within the bandages.

He holds onto your hand, letting you speak your emotions, letting you cry and letting you weep. “I don’t want to die here.”

“I know Y/n, I wont let that happen to you, hell if you’re on the brink of death I’ll take your spot.” He speaks softly, it was a kindness unknown to you from Bakugo. But you took it all, “I should’ve talked to you after the fire, but I had to think, I saw the news the next day and the death count…”

He doesn’t continue, you bring your palm to his cheek, a tear from his own eye. You both had sworn to protect the people and here you were killing them for something that had less than a 40% chance of being successful. He nuzzled his cheek into your palm, before bringing your hand to his mouth, he left an open mouth kiss on your knuckles as you both stayed in silence. Relishing in the comfort that the two of you brought and knowing that the unlikelihood of you two getting out of this place alive. Was slim at best.

i’d really appreciate if you guys could leave a like, reblog or comment, thanks x

if you guys want to be a part of a tag list, just reply to any post and i’ll add you xx

@samusimp @alainarose13 @crispychannie @underratedmage @jennammaee @cathy8taffy @sugacious @moonlightaangel @kat-sukis-hoe @effmigentlywithachainsaw @swankiifiied @maat-the-prescriptive @missmultifangirl @tvwhoresblog @kuroos-world

#bnha bakugou #katsuki bakugo x reader #my hero academia x reader #bakugo x reader #katsuki x reader #bakugo katsuki x reader #mha bakugo x reader #mha bakugo katsuki #mha katsuki #mha bakugo katsuki x reader #bnha #bnha x reader #boku no hero academia #boku no hero fanfic #fanfics #katsuki bakugo fanfiction #my hero academia #bakugohoex #katsuki bakugo fluff

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sickfic-with-kiko · 4 years

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Maybe someone from a couple of your choosing could get sick on their first real date and they’re mumbling apologies whilst caretaker just wants to get them home in one piece? Bonus points if sick character denies it up until the last second and then slumps into their date and/or throws up on their shoes. Idk the main thing is comfort!!!

I chose SakuAtsu because I desperately need more Sakusa content in regards to sickfic. Don’t read this one if you don’t like vomiting, folks.

Sakusa had started dating Atsumu three weeks ago.

He’s not sure how he’d managed to fall for him, or how he’d managed to get a confession out of him. Atsumu, as it turns out, was rather shy when it came to dating. Upon a small amount of questioning, even Sakusa had more experience than him.

He doesn’t really mind. It’s refreshing, and it betrays his expectations of what Atsumu would be like to a partner. He wonders why he’d even made those assumptions. He’d only ever seen him glaring at fangirls who didn’t shut up during his serve.

And now, sitting at a table in a small antique cafe, Sakusa is waiting for Atsumu to meet up with him for his first date.

Going out together as busy high schoolers is hard. Hyogo and Tokyo aren’t exactly neighbouring prefectures, and to emphasize it once more, they’re extremely busy . Schoolwork to be done, practice to be attended. There’s not enough free time, they only realise when they need it.

“Hey! Uh, sorry, did you wait?” Atsumu hops into his line of vision, pulling out his phone to check the time. “You’re so early, Omi-kun!”

Sakusa shrugs. It’s the result of a lot of preparation on his part, dressing appropriately after being laughed at by Komori (“You’re not meant to wear that school jersey, you dumbass!”), grabbing some spare masks and making sure he was feeling completely fine.

He had no problem with completing two of them. But feeling fine is an extremely rare occurrence for him. Something always seems to be up with him— his head hurts, his shoulder feels unwell, his eye is twitching in the wrong manner. It’s all in his head, he’s heard from every possible person. It doesn’t make the wrongness disappear.

“...I didn’t wait.” Sakusa says, picking up the menu with a small frown. “I’ll get some yokan.”

Atsumu’s eyes blow open. “Yokan? Wow, are you a granny?” He teases, in his thick kansai accent. “But it’s cute, Omi-kun. Unexpected.”

Sakusa feels the blood rushing to his face, but glares at him instead. “Cute? I think you need a doctor’s appointment. Something is up with you.” Cute should be used on small animals or fancy decorated cakes, not a sullen high schooler like him.

Atsumu looks at him with his smitten eyes, smiling. “Is it that weird, to call your boyfriend cute? We’re dating, right?”

“Yes. It’s pretty clear that we’re… partners.” Sakusa rolls his words around in his mouth, as if they’re little pebbles that get in his way.

They order their food and drink, and chat for a bit until it comes. Sakusa can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong, but he ignores it for the sake of his date. It’s the one thing he can’t ruin. No matter what.

“Omi-kun. You have a little something there.”

Atsumu wipes the corner of his mouth with a napkin. He doesn’t try to be suave or flirtatious in doing so, surprisingly. He just grins at him like he’s seen something special. Sakusa’s heart jumps, doing a somersault.

“...Thanks.” Sakusa murmurs. He feels… boring. He isn’t sure what Atsumu sees in him. He barely talks about anything interesting, and it’s not like he has the looks or personality. And even if Atsumu is annoying, some could find that endearing.

“How’s volleyball been? Is it fun?”

There isn’t really anything else to talk about, besides volleyball. It’s that, or studies. And Sakusa knows very well about how much Atsumu hates studying. There’s nothing else for them to focus on, really.

“It’s been a busy few weeks,” Sakusa answers. “I have to make sure my team will be fine without me, after Spring High.” Maybe mentioning that was a bad idea. A dead weight sinks into his stomach, forcing something up to his chest.

“You’re really responsible, aren’t ya?” Atsumu says, slurping on his strawberry milk. “I’m sure my team will be fine. But maybe I should look out for them a little more.”

Sakusa shrugs. “Maybe.”

After a short pause, Atsumu finishes his drink and stands up. “Come on. Change of scenery. We'll go for a walk around here.”

Sakusa can’t help wondering if he’s done something wrong. Had he said the wrong thing? Had he said too little? He lifts himself up, his chest thumping worriedly.

They exit the cafe and head down the street, down to a quiet park. It’s a warm day, but Sakusa can’t stop trembling periodically. There’s something strange going on with him. He can’t let it ruin his date.

“...Omi-kun, you okay? Did I do something to make you mad?”

Sakusa shakes his head quickly. Bad idea. A wave of dizziness overwhelms him, and he realizes. It’s not all in his head, like it usually is. He’s actually, truly sick.

“No. Not your fault.” Sakusa can only mumble, sitting down on a nearby bench before he loses footing. “I’m fine.”

“Ya sure?” Atsumu says. “You looked a bit... out of it.”

Sakusa bites his lip out of frustration. He can’t be seen through. Atsumu isn’t meant to be perceptive like this. Everything is his own fault. He hates how he ruins everything. He’s horrible—

He pulls himself out of his brain. “...Sorry. I’m making everything worse. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Atsumu reaches over to him, and pulls back when he touches his shoulder. “Is it just me, or are you hotter than usual?”

“It’s just you.” Sakusa mumbles, waving Atsumu’s hand away. “I’m not sick. Leave me alone.”

“I never said ya were,” Atsumu raises his brows, and Sakusa realises he’s screwed up. He wouldn’t have done something so stupid if he weren’t sick. Now that Atsumu is catching on, he feels even worse.

He starts to shiver. It’s too cold, and he feels sleepy. “Don’t worry about me. I’m fine, Atsumu.”

Atsumu grabs him, when he ends up unknowingly slumping against him. “But Omi-kun, you have a fever! Yer not fine! You need to rest, or else you’ll get worse!”

“But our date. I can’t be the one to ruin it.” Sakusa whispers, and Atsumu sighs softly. His arm wraps around him tighter, his grip comforting and warm. He snuggles closer, shutting his eyes.

A soft kiss is planted onto his cheek. “You didn’t ruin anything. It’s okay. I love you all the same, sick or not.”

Sakusa feels like the luckiest man on earth. The possibility of someone like him getting a boyfriend is slim, and yet he’s somehow winning so much at life. He returns the hug, while Atsumu strokes his curls softly.

“Come on. Let’s get you home.” Atsumu pats him on the shoulder, helping him to his feet. “I can take care of you, okay?”

“Okay,” Sakusa mumbles, too sick to care. They have to walk to the train station, for that to happen. His face is reddened beneath the mask, and he’s aware of how hot his breath is. To stay standing is a chore.

With every step, something in his stomach seems to grow heavier. His mouth is watery, and he stops mid-step to press his hand to it. He can’t walk anymore. If he continues like this, he’ll be sick.

“Omi-kun? What’s wrong?” Atsumu peers into his face, and Sakusa crouches down at the exact same time with a groan. “Does it hurt somewhere?”

A sick hiccup comes out of his mouth. There’s no time for him to react, before it turns into a gurgle. When he inhales shallowly, a thick rush of liquid rises to his throat. “Oh, fuck, I…”

Atsumu rubs Sakusa’s back in gentle strokes. “Aw, man. You really are sick, huh?” He murmurs, staying by his side and showing no sign of disgust. Sakusa is starting to wonder if he’s a saint. He knows that if anyone close to him was as sick as he was, he would take off running and not even look back.

But there’s no way of thanking him. If he opens his mouth even slightly more, he’ll surely throw up. He holds his knees tightly, bracing himself for the inevitable. A bead of spit dangles from his lip. There’s a strong sense of anxiety in his chest, because he hates how he’s so sick, hates how disgusting he looks.

“There’s nobody here. It’s just you and me, okay?” Atsumu reassures him in a soft voice. “And I promise I won’t tell. Just let it happen, and I’ll take care of everything.”

A strained cough tears out of Sakusa, and the pressure in his chest squeezes tighter. He can barely breathe. Every wave of nausea brings him closer to throwing up. A choked gag rises to his throat, and his stomach takes it as a cue to let loose.

Vomit flows into his mouth, splattering onto the pavement with a sick-sounding retch. He screws his eyes shut so that he won’t have to see, but the smell is overwhelming. As soon as he takes in a breath, a second wave of vomiting hits. He can’t believe this is happening.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. You’re doing fine.” There’s a comforting hand rubbing Sakusa’s back. It belongs to Atsumu, whose day he’s sure he’s ruined. He’s sick, and not even in a cute way. Instead of just sneezes or a mild fever, he’s emptying his guts loudly without a shred of dignity.

It doesn’t ever seem to end. Wave after wave of liquid pours out of him like a faucet, leaving him at the mercy of his stomach. The heaving puts pressure on his eyes, and tears slide down his cheeks one after the other. He wants to go home.

Atsumu hands him some tissues, grabbing a few coins out of his pocket to buy a drink. “Let’s try and head to the station. Ya feel okay?” Sakusa nods, wiping his mouth and spitting bitter slime into the tissues.

The ground is spinning beneath his legs. He can barely focus on standing up, and there’s a lingering ache inside his head. “...Atsumu. Can you call my parents? I don’t want to puke on a train.”

“Sure thing. Drink some water, you need it.” Atsumu tosses a bottle over to Sakusa, as he hands him his phone. “Will your mom pick up, do you think?”

Sakusa nods, wobbling over to a low wall and leaning against it. He uncaps the bottle of water, swallowing some of the liquid. It makes everything slightly better, once his mouth is no longer lined with drying vomit.

Atsumu shuffles beside him after a few minutes, giving his phone back. “I called. They’ll be here soon.”

“...Sorry I made you take care of me.” He murmurs, guilt and stomach pain eating at him. “I want to make it up to you, when I’m better.”

“Don’t be sorry. Just thank me. And when ya take care of me someday, I’ll thank you!” Atsumu snickers, patting Sakusa’s back playfully. “Come on. We’re boyfriends. This shit was gonna happen someday. It just came sooner than expected, right?”

Warm arms wrap around Sakusa, as he leans into Atsumu and shuts his eyes tightly. “You’re a good boyfriend, Atsumu. I love you.”

“Love ya too.” Atsumu ruffles Sakusa’s curls, noticing how hot his body is to the touch. He needs plenty of sleep and care, so he can shake off whatever nasty sickness he has. “Rest well, okay? You deserve it.”

#sickfic #sakuatsu #sakusa kiyoomi #Miya Atsumu #haikyuu #emeto

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selfcareparker · 3 years

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(lovely anon) i'm so happy to finally be answering this oh my goodness hi gorgeous human being i feel that it has been too long 🥲 SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED SINCE THE LAST TIME I'VE WRITTEN ONE OF THESE HOW HAVE YOU BEEN

to answer the things you have said most recently- i'm so mad that spring break is over bc now i have to go back to life??? like dancing and school and shit that feels so unnessacry 😭 and like i can't just do nothing anymore? i was so used to it and now...... ugh. i STILL haven't played sims (i think it's because ✨depression✨ be hitting sometimes) lol but MWAHAH IM SO HAPPY FOR YOUR NEIGHBOR!AU AND THAT THEY HAD LITTLE BABY LEO!! i feel the name thing.. i just come up with something that sounds nice? i think leo is a nice name, it makes me think about lea michele and the fact that her son's name is Ever Leo but anyway. i don't name my sims after what i want to name my children irl either... idk why though. (i don't know why i'm telling you this but for boy names i love Liam🥰 and if i had twin boys i think i would do Liam and Peter though i am not married to the name Peter.... anywho)

LMAOOO the therpaist coming made me laugh thank you :)) i hope it's helpful? this may be tmi but i've only really had negative thoughts recently and not many healthy outlets so i'm hoping crossing one thing off this sad list will make me feel better :') i think during spring break my anxiety and my depression really spiked? idk, it comes in episodes but yeah THIS GOT REALLY SAD

i think a lot of things when i read your posts but i never say them hahaha so imma say it now: i googled what bon appetit meant ( i also just had to google how to spell it ) but ur right, i feel like bone apple tea makes more sense than bone apple teeth.. the "th" is throwing me off bc how i say it bone appa (like app-a) teet (like you're saying tit but teet lol) so bone apple tea makes more sense to me lol

i never know really know the time difference for anything lmao but est to germany (that's not gmt is it?) is like 6 hours wOAH so it's like 9pm while it’s 3pm here? wowee

i feel mega weird after watching this show called hollywood (darren criss is in it, so is laura harrier and a bunch of other people) but i don't like it💀 i feel really icky rn and idk why but reading your last response to my ask (?) always makes me feel better :')

i am doing what you said btw, i'm typing this on my computer first then gonna transfer it to my phone's tumblr lol but when you said a digital detox, it's interesting cuz i feel like i've been having one since tom's new project was announced? gOD i don't wanna get into it bc i get so triggered but i've been off of instagram since then bc instagram stans literally stand by tom through whatever even when something ain't right- i’m just gonna leave it there bc i’ll continue the rant, but yeah so i took a break lol

also heard abt your driving lesson thing (?) was it that bad? i can't find the old post but someone asked if you hooked up with your lesson person and i was sOOO CONFUSED LMAOO LIKE OK ARIA GET SOME BUT UHH HUH?

now to address the actual response HAHA the way you touch my heart :') by :') bringing :') up :') halle :') being ariel :') (i honest to God don't remember if i brought this up first, forgive me if i did, it's been a minute lmao) i'm always talking about it and i'm pretty sure my family is so tired of me talking about it lmao, but YEAH when i found out they weren't twins i was so surprised but idk why i always thought they were twins? but YOU ARE SPEAKING MY LANGUAGE WITH THE DISNEY TALK- everyone is always like "tiana is my favorite princess" and yea she's strong and stuff but...... she was a frog. for almost the whole time. it's about time we got another one!! i do agree with some people on the fact that disney should just make another black princess but halle is adorable and i was ariel on stage so it's already really special to me :')

yeah lol there are good times with my brothers but they make me mad for a good portion of the time (there's the 12yo vincent and the 7yo daniel but vincent??? psshhh he is a piece of work and i'm not sure how much longer i can put up with him HAJAH AND YES VINCENT IS THE ONE WHO WAS 👁👄👁WHEN I CRIED AND THE ONE WHO DOESN'T LISTEN TO MUSIC- writing this now makes it sound like vincent is awful. which he isn't... we're working on him ig. not to add to the awfulness but no, he listens to obnoxious loud VIDEO GAME MUSIC and won't stop when we ask him to stop... he gets beat up a lot) anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌

yeah let me know if you end up watching it (wandavision)! i think it's great but if you like it lmk!! tfatws is sooo good like PHEW i am honestly loving it. sidenote: j*hn w*lker makes me wanna jump through the screen and choke him to the ground. i was thinking right, and the falcon and the winter soldier (THATS SO MUCH EASIER FAJHKDAH) would techinally be like a 10 hour movie right? because every episode is an hour long and there'll be 10 episodes? like wow. i get what you mean though, abt the racism in the show etc, like looking forward to it but not like..... no i get what you mean i will not try and give another example lol but you make me wanna learn more languages like really badly (bc of what you said about the german to american translation) & if you end up watching hamilton PLEASE LMK ABT THAT TOO HAHAHA i love it so much, same thing with lion king lmaoo

speaking of germany, i was at lunch on saturday with my mom and her friend and we were talking about my schooling and like-- she planted this idea in my head lol like what if i just got my GED and went around the world (to england probably) to get a theatre experience??? and i think it sounds so cool but no where near practical lol, it's just..... the dream haha and i would then try and learn a language 😉

uh yes we absolutely should order basically a resturant meal at a cinema, how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?

also about cherry (which i still haven't watched yet lol) i got the timestamps from tumblr😌 i couldn't find them anywhere else, but i agree, i probably wouldn't even look twice at cherry if tom wasn't in it? like i liked tdatt a lot, but it's not a movie i would be itching to see ya know?

HAHAHAHA THE 24 HOUR NOTIFICATION- i think i have around 1030 hours on sims? but i've had it since 2019 lmao (reading the screenshots, yes u are 100% a genuis, i take screenshots too but on anon you can't upload them so i just read them and retype what i wrote lmao) i think the university experience in the game is fun, but time consuming and it's all work imo. idk why i do it so often tho 😭😭😭

and agreed!! when you're making good money in the game you have to find other ways to make it interesting. my cousins who play it just continously do "motherlode" and i'm like.... then what do you do in your game?? it just sounds boring to me... my current sims household, i had a famous comedian sim, her name was dylan, aND SORRY IM LAUGHING SO HARD WHILE WRITING THIS BC ITS A GREAT EXAMPLE OF THE UNI THING UNLESS IM JUST DUMB, she went to college for communications when i wanted her to be a comedian and when she graduated i realized that degree did nothing for the career 🥲 so yeah, i think i'm just dumb. but she had a kid in college, guy didn't stick around and she was pretty broke HA but then she got married to this (great) guy named steve, made good bank, had 5 more kids (two sets of twins and one more lol) but then she passed. uhm... yeah that's still an open wound . lol i'm kidding, but when you get rich like that, you have to find a way to make the game interesting and i chose a million kids.

(this was one giant paragraph until i broke it up uhh yeah) i seriously don't pay attention to the sims prices and just end up spending way too much money and not being able to finish the rest of the house😭 but then again, i'm so used to having sims live in apartments... if i end up building a house FIRST OF ALL it'll look like what you explained before lmao but i'll tell you if i actually end up building a house HAHA & planning out your sims game is so fun to me lol, did enisa and michael take in his daughter yet? i may be thinking too far ahead lol and i love that they fucked woohooed (i say woo woo lol) in celebration HAHA but when i was playing with this one couple i had them woo woo every night hoping the dude would have horrible pull out game and they would concieve, but one night they were too tired and i was like why? get back in there man. if i was in college and lived with my partner we would be fucking every night homie. be grateful. i have been talking a lot about sims, and like you said: enough 💀 i just love this game a lot 😭😭

SORRY LAST THING i think the sims romantic and sexual stuff is so nice bc its what i want?? LMAO IDK like the whole hot tub thing you're talking about- puh lease ITS JUST NICE TO SEE OKAY

i'm reading the german section over again and i said aloud "my german friend is so cool" lol (i was saying that to my brothers & i know they don't care LMAO) (& i'm glad the uni zoom call went well!!) so on a form, in german, it could possibily say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer because you would be a participant to an introductory event? i swear german sounds so cool 😌 but i love reading your german lessons!! it's really interesting, most of the time my brain can't comprehend it tho?? like that word makes sense to you, but i need a translation. like to be able to look at that and know what it says.... its just appealing and seems so cool lol i kinda wanna write something out in german but i feel that google translate will fail me. während googeln "google übersetzen" mein Computer war so verdammt langsam und es fühlte sich einfach wie etwas Gutes auf Deutsch zu sagen. ich bin nicht sicher, welches Wort ist "fucking", aber ich mag es lmao (did it fail me like i thought it would??)

LMAOOO THANK YOU FOR BRINGING UP JUSTIN BC WHILE AT THE RESTURANT THEY PLAYED A JUSTIN SONG AND I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT OF YOU AND THIS STORY😭 lol i was thinking it's depending on your age but not even that either... i really don't know.... but tom's fans are hollanders💀 i would consider myself one? he's the only person i'm really into like that (like a lot lol) so idk lmao (directioners 💔💔the pain is real)

LMAOOO (both of these paragraphs started off with “lmaooo” smh) "i like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death" PLEASE, i don't like pete's blonde hair... i just don't. i'm not sure if i wasn't watching the most recent snls but yea. my mom thinks he looks like trash, but i think he's okay? like he said staten island people just look like trash LMAO and I STILL HAVEN'T SEEN KING OF STATEN ISLAND GIRL I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THAT!! now i'm gonna make plans to watch it lmao, & yes agreed i find pete hot, don't ask why i really couldn't explain it to someone he's just .

my favorite songs from rex are from pony oh my goodness 🥺 anywho i'm gonna go eat cereal (i ended up eating bun and cheese instead) and listen to the Stormzy songs you recommended... aria. aria aria aria. i would like to thank you for introducing me to stormzy i- i don't have any words or any emojis to express HOW GOOD STORMZY IS. i hope he's popular in germany/the uk because i haven't heard of him but GURLLLL

one second - delicious i love it. it's really good. it’s not my favorite from the album, but its great.

superheroes - at first i played the non-explicit one (on accident) and wondered why the words weren't playing but i was reading them in the lyrics??? THIS ONE THOUGH??? IS THE BEST SONG I THINK I'VE EVER HEARD. i am so SO SO into black people empowering songs (like brown skin girl by beyonce) and this song???? PHEW I CRYYYYY ITS SO GOOD.... i was gonna quote some lyrics BUT THERS TOO MANY I LOVE, "i am young, black, beautiful, and brave" "black queen, you're immaculate, it's coming at the world, they ain't ready for your magic yet, and that was never your fault" THAT WAS NEVER YOUR FAULT- I ALMOST CRIED THIS SONG IS SO BEAUTIFUL (i played it twice lol)

lessons is another beautiful one, like its slow and it feels intimate and nurturing and just OO chefs kiss, beautiful . like you can feel the apology and the regret... it’s so good

own it - OWN IT OWN IT OWN IT IS AMAZING!! swear you would catch me dancing to this song, this song is so fucking good i cannot comprehend like this one might be my favorite for real... "it's the way you wind up your waist, i'm so in awe, you never have to worry abt nothing, you know its yours, you know you own it" 🥲 i played it two or three times honestly

rachael's little brother - YES I DID LISTEN TO IT LMAO AND YES I LIKE IT, its a very complex song and it's very layered in terms of emotions i think and i really like that about it. i probably won't listen to it that often, but its really good. i would recommend this song to my "older brother" bc he would just absolutely love this

shut up - i was taking this song seriously (also very good) until i heard him say shu-T up LMAO, this one is good, i probably wouldn't listen to it 24/7 like rachael's little brother but honestly its still fire

before listening to blinded by your grace and vossi bop, i know you brought up the religion bit, i definitely don't mind that, especially because i'm Christian lol and i actually liked that he brought up God in some of his songs like idk i just like it🥰🥰

(i then went to bed after that lol but first thing in the morning i listened to superheroes and... that song is probably my favorite tbh, i was gonna write MORE quotes that i loved from it but, yeah no there's too many. if you want i'll tell you lmao but this is already so long i would just be quoting the whole friggin song)

VOSSI BOP IS A BOP (lol) I CANT EVEN LIE, i love a song that hypes up a dude's girl so the line- i love that my phone decided to fail to load the lyrics, lemme google it, okay the lyric "looking at my girl like what a goddess" i was like AYEEE its honestly just really good. and no one in america says "sauce" like "i've got the sauce" but now i do (thanks to love island and Nas from last season) and now stormzy so (also im gonna watch the music video for superheroes bc it looks great so 😛)

(because this is already so long i feel like i shouldn't finish the rest but . no i'm gonna do it)

now for blinded by your grace pt2 idk why i’m nervous lmaoo PAUSE I'M NOT EVEN DONE WITH THE SONG GIRL THIS SONG IS *chefs kiss* no words, speechless PHEW y'all gon make me start jumping around. why did i not know about stormzy before, he is amazing i- ok yeah i finished the song, all i have to say is that Stormzy is immaclucate. period. i am literally sending his music to all my friends he is..... amazing

you want my song recommendations 🥺🥺 hmm uh okay lol i listen to a lot of old music, whitney houston, marvin gaye, queen, celine dion, i love "more than words" by extreme uhmm okay, but for actual music i listen to on the daily? (this is a lot of different music like.... they do not go together lmao so be prepared) a song about being sad by rex orange county, betty by taylor swift and lover by taylor swift and... most of that album lol, treasure by bruno mars lmao, OOOO and versace on the floor by bruno as well, lazybaby by dove cameron, creep by tlc has been on repeat lol, deja vu by olivia rodrigo (i saw what you said about drivers license and AGREED LMAO but i like deja vu a lot more haha) and two albums that i listen to in general, rare by selena gomez and ungodly hour by chloe x halle 🥰 you don't have to listen to all of them or any of them lol but that's a sense of what i'm into :) so basically everything haha, i'm into literally every single kind of music really so i wasn't too surprised that i enjoyed stormzy :’)

HAHASBSJHAHA your h20 story cracked me up,, like "wow these actors are so dedicated, learning german just for us" 😭 the beauty of overdubbing

once again, math and maths, in my mind maths makes sense because its mathmatics, but saying maths doesn't feel right to me lol, like if i said maths i feel like everyone would look at me like ??? and yea i was taught it as math so its just more natural for me. but yes math/maths is disgusting, easily one of my least favorite subjects so .

mkay. i- the first time i read this i could not contain my laughter when you said the only pollen you know is sex pollen LMAOKOOSHBABJFAJF STOPPP I'M EVEN LAUGHING WRITING THIS,, anyway. wow! that's interesting, my dad (<<< mostly anything else) gets migraines from the sun and the heat and stuff, yesterday (sunday, i was outside for like hours watching my brothers play football, the american kind lol) i was in the sun for like ever and i got a headache😔

summer clothes🥲 i need to go shopping fr fr. for my birthday my mom and dad got me a giftcard like dedicated to a shopping spree and we've yet to go so..... i should bring it up to my mom lol, but!! i went bra shopping (ended up returning literally all of them cuz they honestly didn't work for day to day work? its a long story) and if i could i would walk around in this new "summer bra" i got, i would. it's so fricking cute and its really light fabric (which isn't perfect for my nipples but still) so i don't get hot in it, but that bra and some shorts would be perfect. its the closest thing to being naked so

IS THE BIRD STILL BOTHERING U ARIA, TELL ME NOW ISTG, i laughed really hard that the bird isn't stupid and is really trying to torture you LMAOO like i was rolling, it wants you to suffer, badly

when you said "mensus" it was still close to mens!!! latin speaking queen 😌😌

okay STORYTIME i was reading back your response and started (fake) crying bc i love you lol and my youngest brother (daniel) gon say "oh man, catherine's crying about something we don't care about, again" I--- i swear when i tell you about them they sound awful, but they aren't that bad, just the stuff i say about them is sounds really mean LMAO

but the thing you said about being kind, same, what i always say is: don't be the person that makes people say "i hate people" ya know? like there's no reason to be a jerk or anything.... but its true 🥺🥺🥺🥺 you are really kind and every time i talk to you i would like to personally fly to germany and give you a hug 💖💕💞💗💓💝💖💘

& i'm gonna show my stretch marks some love bc of you 🥺😭 i really hate how men have basically everyone conditioned that you can't love your own body </3 fuck them, y'all beautiful :')

also thanks for what you said :')) you literally are the kindest, sweetest person i think i've ever spoken to and i love you 🥰🥺🥲💓💗

READING YOUR TAGS HAHAHHAHA the spelling errors makes everything so much funnier. once again, i like your german lessons & yea!! i'm gonna play sims after writing this hahah

#catherine's tags are back #i don't think i've told you my name before?? #anyway it's catherine🥰🥰🥰 #i'm typing this on my computer (without emojis) and if i didn't edit this you would be reading shit shite like #heartface and pout and cry LMAO #yeah abt the tattoos #some stuff with my parents i'm like deal with it??? lol #my mom tells me "if there's something you enjoy or you like but i don't have the same opinion on it... why would my (my mom's) opinion matter? #and i love that #like i'm not gonna go and do whatever i want #but if my mom doesn't like that i swear (which isn't true just an example) #its like okay.... #but whatever #and your tattoo ideas sound really cute!! #and yeah @ your parents, i mean you aren't getting something wild #and the tattoo album>>> #i'm gonna look up ariana's butterfly tattoos just so i know what you mean lol #but i'm guessing you don't want something so incredibily simple, but not super like over the top? #correct me if i'm wrong lol #LMAO the tags were in order don't worry ! #and yeah lol ily2 <33 #and once again, again, sorry for this post JSHJS ITS A MESS AND LONG AS HELL #and you don't need to go in order of my post its literally longer than your german compound words #u're fine #also !!! while writing this the birds were chirping outside and i was like 😳 #and one of your fics (i’ve read all of them, i don’t remember lol) that valentine’s day one where y/n had lingerie on (the pancake one lol) #inspired me to buy lingerie #like when i look back on me “growing up” #that fic & basically you lol really helped with that #that made no sense and i don’t know how to make it make sense... but... yeah. like ily

hiiiiiiiiiii <3333

Dear catherine, 😌

(you have said your name before, but it wasn‘t like an introduction or anything i think you were talking about .... was it possibly the incident at the cinema??? And you said something like ‘calm down catherine‘ like you were telling yourself to calm down idkd dkdkkdkd anyway i didn‘t mention it cause i wasn‘t sure if it was an accident or not dkdjd but now i know 😌❤️ Catherine is such a cute and lovely name btw omg and so are your brothers‘s names 🥰

Sorry that I‘m answering this so late, it‘s been an emotional rollercoaster for me since last week but i‘ll get to that in a second lol

Sksklssk girl i haven‘t played sims in like 2 weeks now ekejdkdlldld ok that‘s not that long at all actually but i keep wanting to play but then i end up not playing for whatever reason, so no news about my sims game 😔 but i love the names Liam and Peter and for twins!!! That sounds really nice actually

okay i‘m trying to answer your ask in chronological answer even though i wanted to wait for the depressing stuff and write it at the end or something OKAY so. i thought that i‘d feel so good when i start uni and that i‘ll like... have a purpose in life again and just be happy (cause in the last year i didn‘t do much and i was depressed like half of the time lol).... anyway i kind of feel even worse now? 😭 i think it‘s because in my brain it‘s like: university!!! that means your life will change and it‘ll all be so exciting. and don‘t get me wrong it is exciting butttt..... idk the online thing is so weird cause you‘re not meeting any new people (i‘m introverted anyway but still lol) and it doesn‘t feel like you‘re listening to/talking to actual people cause it feels the same as just watching a video?

also i thought i‘d be busy again but i only have one lecture (90mins) a day and theres one day where i dont have any lectures at all and just one day where i have 3 hours but.... idk i mean i shouldn‘t complain about having so much free time but i just don‘t know what to do all day and in a pandemic there really is nothing to do but i also can‘t relax bc it‘s like during the week and i know i have uni the next day and .... yeah.

There‘s also this one assignment i had to do that took me AT LEAST SIX HOURS AND IM NOT EVEN EXAGGERATING????? so that was the only thing i‘ve been doing besides “going to“ lectures. for this one course we have to read two (really really long) texts (like it literally took me 3 hours to read them) and we‘re supposed to post it on this website that all the professors in our uni use. So after 5 days of anxiety (✌🏼) i posted mine this morning bc last night i realised that i didn‘t even know why i was having anxiety so i just posted mine today. The deadline is tomorrow at 12 and no one except me has posted theirs yet........ so i have anxiety again 🥰 cause idk if i‘m the only one who did it or if i even did it correctly

Edit while i‘m rereading this: my anxiety about uni is a lot better and i‘m not as d*pressed anymore maybe it was just hormones? idk but i‘m better so that‘s good

(I started writing this like 5 hours ago and then i randomly completely forgot lol)

I‘m in a better mood now though so let‘s move on from that (oh wait also, i think i‘m gonna see if i can find a psychiatrist bc with my anxiety symptoms (long story) i need to go to a psychiatrist, and so far i‘ve only gone to like psycholgists and it didn‘t help but i think that‘s just bc i was meant to go to a psychiatrist and not a psychologist so dldjdjsj

n e ways but yes you‘re not alone, ily, things will get better and yes i love you (i‘m not good at this type of thing🥲 but i‘d hug you right now if i could <3)

Yess i think the time difference between est and me is 6hours but gmt is uk time i believe? i think mine is called.... cet? For central european time? I could be completely wrong though lmao

Oof i completely forgot about hollywood, i remember when laura kept posting about it on instagram but i never actually watched it and i definitely won‘t now lmaodkdksjsn

Okay my driving lesson LEBDJDKDK I DID NOT HOOK UP WITH ANYONE AKSJSKSMMLM especially not my 40 or 50 year old driving instructor lol i like her but NOT LIKE THAT, the lesson was really really really good actually and i think i‘ll have my driving test soon, but i don‘t even remember why the anon would have thought that??? Oh wait now i remember okay KEKSKDLDL so during the lesson my instructor was like do you mind if i turn on some music? AND THIS WOMAN TURNED ON ONE DIRECTION I LOVE HER so i made a post about it and i said something about the song up all night and i guess i phrased it in a .... idk in a dumb way 💀 so the anon made a joke that i stayed up with my driving instructor all night and NO. No.

Wait did i read that right? YOU WERE ARIEL ON STAGE? SIALDBDJDKSLMSBDKDMDMDKDJSLSMDJFJJEDMBFEKLEFBJDLDVSIDLESKSKWKDKDJDOWNYUEKWNDUWLNSUFLWVSUDLEHDOENSIDBEISBEHENJELBSIEMWUDNRIW KB WOBE JO ON SBEUU HIII S HWS LV W ICH US KB okay this keyboard smash is getting out of hand but uh please do elaborate on that 💘😌???? Like you can‘t just drop that information and not say more??? I forgot if you‘re in like your school‘s drama group (is that a thing? lol idk anything about acting) or in an independent group? Either way - ARIEL that is so fucking cool

Your brothers loooooool, no i get it though obviously you love them and stuff but esp at their age children are so annoying so good luck with them 😭😭😭lmao

Yeah “anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌“ yeah just me and my parents who constantly fight 🥰 lmao no i like being an only child, like i cannot imagine having siblings but i feel like if i had siblings i would be saying that i can‘t imagine being an only child so? but i do think it‘s quite different like i‘m trying to imagine having siblings and WHAT that‘s just so different omg i‘ve never really thought about it like properly ???

I saw a tik tok the other day that was like “sometimes i forget that my siblings have a life of their own. like i see them as side characters in my life“ and even though i can‘t relate obviously i felt that. lol, like i can really imagine how it feels idk what i‘m talking about like shut the fuck up, daria

(also my actual name is daria not aria but i dont like it, and also i wanted to be more anonymous on tumblr so now i‘m aria lmao. pls don‘t mention it though cause no one knows except for you and mel (peterbenjiparker) dkdkdkdnkdnd. but i‘m starting to identify with the name cause everyone keeps calling me that looool😭😭😭 (but i like the name, more than daria anyway? well it also depends on the accent, cause the way germans say daria is okay. the was Americans say it is also okay, but some of my family in England are from the north of england and i don‘t like how they say my name 💀 no offence to them(?) but yeah pls don‘t mention the name in your ask cause the chance of people seeing it is higher then (or if you want to say something about it just send a separate ask and i just won‘t post it (IDK what you‘d want to say about my name but yeah just in case slsldlldmsndnsns)

I‘m loving falcon and winter soldier so much but when i was watching an episode the week before last week (?) my laptop broke😭😭😭😭 during the scene where the dora milaje came at the end my laptop just shut down? And it had these lines all over the screen and i had to bring it to the shop where i bought it and they said it‘ll take 6-8 weeks to repair 💔💔💔 but at least it‘ll be for free, cause if i brought it back to apple it would cost like 400€ (i think that‘s nearly 500$) so yeah. but it sucks cause now i‘m “going to uni“ on a really old rusty laptop and on my phone which kinda sucks. oh yeah and also i can‘t watch anything on there 😭 i definitely want to watch wandavision but it‘ll have to wait🤧

Yessss you should def get your GED! I googled and I‘m still not entirely sure what it is dldks but from how you described it- YES!!!!!!

Idk if you know this? Like no idea if I‘ve told you this already (hmmm wait i feel like we talked about it actually?) anyway i was originally gonna go study in England, but for loads of reasons I ended up staying in Germany and I‘m def happy with my decision, but I definitely want to go to England sometime even if it‘s just for six months or maybe for my masters or something? And (obviously everyone is different) but i think everyone should go abroad and live in a different country once in their life, no matter if it‘s for school or what, and even if it‘s just for a few weeks. But i think that‘s something that you‘d never ever forget! And combining that with your acting/theatre??? You really would be living the dream 💘💘😌

how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?— sounds good see you soon 🥰🥰🥰

i used to be one of the people who‘d just do motherlode motherlode motherlode and just... what did i do? Why did i do that??? But not anymore lol. Like I said i haven‘t played sims in a few weeks but i‘ve been watching a few legacy challenge let‘s plays and usually i play with the aging off. So my sims just don‘t age 💀 but i could (should) turn aging on so that it stays exciting and i have limited time and everything. and once i get bored with my current sims i can just make them have kids and continue playing as their children when they get older- like recently i remembered that i haven‘t played the acting career in ages? and i haven‘t had a shop in ages? and i think you can even become a vet right??? like those are definitely some things i want to do in the next weeks!!! Also yes sksksjs i have a few hundred hours on sims as well (if not thousands 😭) it was just that one household that i‘d been playing with for 24hrs

AND GIRL SSKSKJD THE UNIVERSITY THING HAPPENED TO ME TOO, it was a while ago so i don‘t remember what degree and what job it was about but i made my sim study something for aaaaaages so she‘d get a better job from the beginning (you know what i mean like get in at a higher level)...... and i apparently studied the wrong thing cause i didn‘t get any benefits from studying and still had to start at level 1 and shit 🥴🥲

Oh also (this was like 2 weeks ago) Enisa and Michael did take in Michael‘s daughter and i think Enisa currently even has a higher/better relationship with the daughter than Michael but um💀💀💀 also i was hoping (since michael and enisa married (in their back yard i think lol) that the daughter (i forget what her name is😭) would have enisa as her step mom? Like you know how you can see the relationship and it says daughter or son or sister.. and i was hoping that it would say step mom but it doesn‘t say anything 🥲 but in my mind (and if the sims had proper family relations) she is her step mom😌 also Leo is a teenager now???? I mean I aged him up lol dkdk he was being too annoying as a toddler but i don‘t like children so i aged him up twice in one day and now he‘s a teen, but that means he can look after his half sister when she becomes a toddler which is good (the game recognises them as siblings tho even if they‘re just half siblings? why can‘t they have step family members in the sims🥲) okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

I‘ve been a bit sick these past few days and now i‘m getting a headache so i have to finish this response tomorrow 😭😭😭 </3

It‘s not tomorrow, it‘s 3 hours later but i‘m better lol

oooff when sims are ungrateful and won‘t woo woo (lol i like that) cause they‘re too tired like?? Be grateful that you‘re not living with your parents anymore 🙄 no okay dkdkdkdl idk if you play with mods (i don‘t) but i know there is a mod (or it‘s part of a mod idk maybe wicked whims?) where you can adjust the percentage of how risky a normal woo woo is, like you still click woo woo (3dksksks okay i‘ll say woohoo again— wait is that what’s it called? 😭) but there‘s like a 25% chance that your sim can still get pregnant just like in real life there‘s always a chance of getting pregnant even if you‘re using protection (just not 25% lmao) but yeah i personally don‘t play with mods sksk and you can always just click try for baby but it would be cool if you could add stuff like risky woohoo to the game without mods (i have no idea how to download mods and i play sims on a really really old laptop and sims is literally tje only thing that works on it anyway so—) i repeat my words from earlier: okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

okay i‘m so sorry i‘m gonna watch fast & furious 1 now cause i need to watch f&f 1-5 until the 30th of april cause they‘re only on netflix til then (i mean i could watch them somewhere else but the quality is never as good) so i will finish this tomorrow after all😭

it is now 1 am, i finished the film, can feel a new obsession coming up again (i always have these f&f obsessions for six months before and after a new film comes out)

THE GOOGLE TRANSLATE wkekdjdj tbh it sounds like someone is speaking with some kind of foreign accent i guess that‘s probably because it just is a direct translation and so anyway slsjsj i don‘t know if you asked me what the word fucking is in german? like idk cause the translation is a bit weird but in case you asked lol sidjsjs theres not really a good translation like we just say fuck for fuck lmao, i don‘t know if you typed in fucking in google translate and it came out as verdammt? cause that means damn (or damned sksjjs) ummm yeah idek if/what you asked so imma move on🤧

I‘m not gonna comment on what you said about every stormzy song cause you already said all the important things but SKSKSJSJSKNSNDBDUDOENWBSLSKKHSULSLSKSBSJSKSK I WAS SMILING SO HARD WHEN I READ YOUR RESPONSE FOR THE FIRST TIME BECAUSE AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH finally i know someone who loves him as much as i do 💘💘💘 also since you brought it up, i‘m pretty sure he‘s considered the most successful UK rapper or if not then at least top 3 so he‘s defffffffffinitely big in the uk, in germany more and more people are listening to uk rap too but not as much stormzy cause theyre dumb apparently 🙄 but anywY i‘m sooooo sooo happy that you like him. i think hith came out end of 2019 (i could be wrong but i think it came out on the 13th of december so (in a european way) you‘d write the date: 13.12 and obviously i don‘t KNOW this but i can definitely imagine that he chose that date because ACAB and yes, Michael. Yes. But he hasn‘t made too much music since then so i hope he‘s working on some new stuff 🤞🏼

Also i ordered the stormzy poster😌 also a nicki minaj one bc i decided i‘m gonna have one wall with red-ish posters (i already have two kinda red ones) and one with blue/green-ish posters (already have two) and i can add stormzy to the blue one and nicki to the red one, but i think that‘s it cause if my walls are tooo full it could look cluttered? I‘m not sure how that type of thing works lmao but my room is generally untidy so i don‘t want the walls to look unorganised too so i think that‘s it for now

I really want to finish this now but my brain is getting kinda slow and i need to sleep soon so this will have to wait till later after all 🥺🥴 (not that it makes and difference to you bc you‘ll see this whenever i post it buttttt i wanted you to know that i want to talk to you again but with my slow brain i‘m just taking too long to do it in one day😭😭😭 and i‘m so busy tomorrow hmm but i‘m sure i‘ll have 30 minutes to finish this then <3)

Okay wait I‘m so dumb I didn‘t realise I‘d nearly answered everything i could have posted this yesterday 😭😭

Oooohh that summer bra sounds so nice like if i was confident enough i literally would just wear a top that resembles a bra (or really is a bra lol) cause my tiddies always be looking amazing i‘m just insecure about my stomach sometimes 🙄🙄🙄 but recently i‘ve been loving myself more and more tbh 😌

also i hope you can go shopping for some nice clothes soon ✨😌

I‘ll be honest I haven‘t listened to your song recs YET but only because i wanna take my time with them and i‘ve been so busy and slso AJ tracey‘s album came out last week and I haven‘t listened to that one yet either so ekdkdj (he‘s also a uk rapper like quite popular and successful as well, but i feel like i‘m not gonna like his album cause whenever i‘m looking forward to an album it ends up being really bad and the albums where you weren‘t expecting it turn out to be bangers.... so yeah but i‘ll let you know when i listen to your songs!!!! :)

Omg i keep having to scroll up all the way to see the next thing you said so sorry if I completely miss some of the things you said😭😭

So when you sent this the bird was still bothering me oh my FUCK DKDLDMMDMDMD but now i‘ve been going to bed at like 1-2am so the bird is probably still asleep lool

Okay and for the rest of your ask my response is: 💘💖❣️💚❣️💛❣️💛💕💞❤️💓💟💞💕💕💖💘💝💟💟🧡❤️🧡💞💛💚💓💚💚💚❣️🧡💖💘🧡💝🧡💕💘🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥰🥺🥺💘💘💘💘💘 (okay that looked cuter in my head i don‘t really like the green hearts dldkkdksndnd)

#lovely anon #<3333333333333 #‚‘it‘s literally longer than your german compound words‘ LMAODKDMSLDKSLKS #ignore the comma at the beginning of the last tag????#aww wait i just read what you said at the end of your tags🥺🥺💘💘💘#love youuuu #ooooof i‘m reading my response and do i not know what a period is? like period as in. full stop.#my sentences are literally paragraphs and i use keyboard smashes to separate sentences from each other like what‘s wrong with me???#or ‚lol‘ snd ‚lmao‘#imma need me to do better (did you listen to heavy is the head as a whole? like the whole album? the song do better is stuck in my head toda #today so)#i‘ll try to write normal length sentenced in the future💀#sentencessss*

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