#idk why i feel like this i probs should be sleeping more. i’m on break. but i feel like i just wasted time

[merevide]

just spent the whole fucking day. wasted the whole day. SLEEPING.

[luvrxbunny]

hi, obsessed with your page & love the content that you post. reading up on your new boy toy, i have to agree with other anons — please be safe. it’s prob something you don’t want to hear bc we don’t know your personal life, but girl-to-girl once dudes get that “post nut clarity” the relationship can go down hill from there. and emphasis on the love bombing thing, it can be real. my first boyfriend before i met my now fiancé, this guy said i love you within the first couple weeks of dating and was EXTREMELY touchy and peer pressuring. when i was shy from his advances, he went on a cruise trip with his family and slept with two girls on that trip because he couldn't keep it in his pants. i was devastated and heart broken, but SO GLAD i didn't sleep with him even though he tried convincing me i should bc we were dating. my now fiancé when i met him college waited a whole year AND went to get STD tested with me before he took my virginity since he had a body count of 3 before me.

i would question WHY his body count is 8 and what happened to his recent break up. if you two are serious, he can be honest with you about his past. like with the previous hookups, were they serious relationships? if so, that's a big red flag for being only 20 years old. if it was something casual, i get it. some people don't want anything serious. still ask if he gets STD tested. a lot of people don't like to go to an urgent care, planned parenthood, or their primary bc they find it embarrassing but those check ups are vital. plus ask his opinion on condoms. a lot of guys for some fucking odd reason hate wrapping it up and will give a million excuses not to put one on when they prob won't even last more than fives minutes

i get it, a new relationship is all exciting and i'm sure your whole following is so happy for you on getting those experiences, but people have skeletons in their closets and god forbid you find out more information that may change your view on him later on in the relationship. be safe!

this was actually really helpful!!

i think i’ll wait as long as possible. it’s very reassuring to know that your fiancé was okay waiting an entire year, that makes me feel like i’m not crazy for considering like 9 months or something

i know that his body count is high cus he usually moves fast sexually and lost his virginity young w a semi-long dating history

i’ll ask him about what he thinks went wrong with his other relationships and he told me he tends to say ‘ily’ very soon so i told him to wait until he can’t help but tell me

it’s almost been a month so i’m a little hopeful? i am trying to keep myself slightly detached and hyper vigilant to manipulative behaviors

i think i’m definitely going to have him get tested before putting his junk anywhere near my junk

umm yea idk why i gave like a little report but … 😁

[twisted-t0xins]

✟𝔇𝔬𝔯𝔪 𝔏𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯𝔰 𝔵 ℭ𝔥𝔞𝔪𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔬𝔫!ℜ𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯

Requested by: @crushthecharmingpuppets

Perhaps the dorm leaders w an s/o who has the ability to turn colors kinda of like a chameleon. And i guess s/o does something they're afraid they'll get in trouble for, like broken a rule, or spilled ink on one of azul's contracts, etc. and Hides from the boys by blending in with They're surroundings in fear of getting in trouble.

⋄ Includes Riddle Rosehearts, Azul Ashengrotto, Leona Kingscholar and Malleus Draconia

A/N: Thank you for the first request :)) ,, when I start writing for more of the dorm leaders I’ll probs do a part 2

|ℜ𝔦𝔡𝔡𝔩𝔢 ℜ𝔬𝔰𝔢𝔥𝔢𝔞𝔯𝔱𝔰 ⋄ 

mans is pissed,, you’re gonna break the rules and then double down by disappearing?? death 

no but the first time he sees it he’s gonna be flabbergasted fr 

if you start doing it often he’s gonna start grabbing you by the arm or something so he knows exactly where you are so you’ll have to pay attention to him ranting

overall, wouldn’t take you trying to blend in too badly,, might be a little annoyed but not super upset

Riddle grabs your arm and sends you a glare, “I can see through your tricks, you know! I’m not going to let you get away again.”

His look softens and he can’t suppress the small, but smug, smile when he sees you sigh in defeat, “It seems you’re finally learning after all this time… I think we should have a look at the rules together. That would make you behave, wouldn’t it.”

|𝔏𝔢𝔬𝔫𝔞 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰𝔠𝔥𝔬𝔩𝔞𝔯 ⋄

I can’t see him getting mad at a lot of things,, but if you step on him (his tail) ohh boy

literal predator and prey behavior,, except if you stayed hidden for too long he’d just give up lmao

if he finds you before he gets bored you’re probs gonna be held hostage for a bit and he’ll be incredibly smug the whole time smh

the whole sitation would make him a little pissy ngl,, like he thinks you’re going overboard bc he wasn’t planning on doing anything too bad (just making you late to class bc you’re sleeping or smthn)

Leona sniffs the air in search of you, “come on out, herbivore, I promise I won’t eat you if you behave~”

He waits for a couple seconds, letting you feel a rush of relief, before he moves his face close to yours. Leona stops just before your noses are touching, “so you’re gonna keep trying to fool me, huh? That’s fine, after all I warned you that there would be consequences…” 

He quickly throws you over his shoulder and laughs at your surprised reaction, “seriously, I don’t know why you even try… or maybe do you want me to capture you~?”

|𝔄𝔷𝔲𝔩 𝔄𝔰𝔥𝔢𝔫𝔤𝔯𝔬𝔱𝔱𝔬 ⋄

messing w his business could make him angry I think,, so he’d def be angry if you messed up his contracts in any way

def not a fan of your disappearing act,, he’d probs immediately feel really terrible the moment you hid and start softly (and a little urgently) saying for you to come out 

I just think azul would take the whole thing rlly seriously bc he can’t stand you ignoring him or hiding from him,, he probs starts thinking too hard about the whole exchange and thinks you don’t like him anymore

Azul felt all of his anger quickly dissolve into guilt after he realized that you were hiding from him, “... I’m not really that mad, you know?”

He lets out a shaky sigh before starting again, “I-I apologize if I scared you… please come out. I can’t handle you hiding from me…”

When you stop hiding, he can’t help but smile in relief. However, this action doesn’t completely put his mind at ease and he struggles to look into your eyes, “I hope your opinions on me have not changed…”

|𝔐𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔢𝔲𝔰 𝔇𝔯𝔞𝔠𝔬𝔫𝔦𝔞 ⋄

oh no :(( his little heart can’t take this,, are you scared of him??

but fr idk what you could do to make malleus mad if he likes you,, 

he’d just look super sad unless you reappear in front of him,, pls just say you were trying to show off a cool trick or smthn and that will def make his mood go back up

so,, maybe don’t do this to malleus,, both of you know he’d never hurt you or even get really angry at you

Malleus’ eyebrows furrow as he realizes what’s happening, surely you aren’t scared of him? He stays silent for a bit before starting, “I understand… I will leave you be for now. Please come find me when you are feeling more comfortable…” 

He stays for a couple seconds, waiting to see if you’ll reappear in front of him. Before he can turn around he sees your guilty expression and his gentle smile comes back, although the sadness in his eyes stays, “please tell me that you are not frightened of me too… I don’t know if I could cope if you were.”

[tinyjeanmarco]

Helloooo 🥺🥺 idk if ur into writing hurt+comfort but I’m in such a big fat mood to cry rn and there’s not a lot Porco angst out here... I was thinking along the lines of modern au and ur already in a relationship but ur incredibly insecure about urself and the relationship, but Porco reassures u in the end that he really does love u and goes out of his way to prove it <3

(I realize u likely won’t get this done tonight and I’ll probs be in a better mood tomorrow BUT it’s still true there isn’t a lot of Porco angst out there!!)

Also if u don’t write angst pls ignore this!! Thank you 💖💖

teddy (a hurt/comfort fic)

hello my darling!! i hope that you’re in a better mood now and don’t want to cry anymore! （＞д＜） remember that it’s okay to cry and to take care of yourself. your body loves you and you should show it just as much love. i do really love hurt/comfort fics! they always make me feel so soft in the comfort part. 🥺 i’ll do my best to write this! i think porco can be a real comforting boyfie that just cares so much about you. ♡ also sorry this was so late after your request, love. (｡ ́︿ ̀｡) i listened to idontwannabeyouanymore by billie eilish, and emotional anorexic by svavar knutur while i wrote this so you kinda get the vibe i was feeling while writing!

wc: 1,818

modern!porco x gn!reader

warnings: some angst, hurt/comfort, happy ending, i swear.

he’s just busy, you thought as you exited the coffee shop. you clutched the cup in your hand tighter as you checked your phone for what must have been the twentieth time that hour.

you texted your boyfriend, asking if he wanted to do something that day, but alas, it’s been a few hours and no response. you knew he had classes, but they should be done by now, meaning he was just ignoring you at this point.

no, he’s busy. you reminded yourself. yet, you weren’t sure how much longer you could buy that thought. you couldn’t tell if that was true anymore, or if it was just a way to keep your bad thoughts at bay.

you debated texting him again, but were worried that you would annoy him. maybe that was the issue in the first place; he saw your text and wanted a break from you, thus making him ignore you. it had already been nine months since you started dating, maybe he was annoyed with you.

you picked up your pace as you walked back to your apartment, no longer wanting to be around people, in case you broke down in some way. you knew it wasn’t the best to be alone when you felt like this, your friends telling you that getting out and doing things would take your mind off your anxious thoughts.

you couldn’t seem to text anyone to tell them you felt trapped.

stepping inside your apartment, you locked the door behind you and toed off your shoes before making your way to the bedroom. you tossed your keys on a table as you walked by.

your mind just kept racing faster the more you were alone with the silence that was suffocating you. the best course of action was to take a nap, you decided. so, you changed, and put on one of porco’s hoodies that he gave you.

yet, when you settled under the covers, sleep wouldn’t find you. your insecurities picked you apart down to the bone. at this point, you had felt like you were being drowned. it was so hard to swim in the fog that was your head.

your brain had managed to convince you that porco was tired of you, and it was on its way to make you think he would break up with you. in the back of your head, you knew this was false, yet it kept persisting. it wouldn’t leave you alone.

instead of ruminating about things you didn’t want to, you thought maybe putting on one of your sad music playlists would help quiet the thoughts, which, in hindsight was an okay idea at most. it really only served to upset you even more.

you didn’t even notice tears were leaking from your eyes until you found your nose was beginning to clog. you wiped at your eyes, and just cried harder.

you were trying so hard to be okay, but your insecurities would not leave you alone. you hated it so much. you just wished they would leave you alone. tired,  you were so tired of always feeling like not enough.

normally, you would communicate to porco about how you were feeling because communication and telling the other how you feel in a relationship is rule number one. yet, you were so convinced he didn’t want anything to do with you at the moment, so you refrained.

the only option left was to just keep crying until sleep somehow made its way to you.

a few hours later is when you woke up, thanks to the constant buzzing of your phone. why couldn’t everyone just leave you alone?

sighing, you did your best to wipe the sleep from your eyes before you squinted at your phone screen to see who was calling.

your heart dropped to the pit of your stomach. it was porco. what would he want? was he finally going to break it off? would he tell you that your texts got on his nerves so he needed space?

you decided you didn’t feel like answering it, not wanting to deal with whatever it is he had to tell you. you weren’t mad at him, you just didn’t want to be even more hurt than you were already. that means ignoring everything completely.

after the phone finally stopped ringing, you kept getting texts from him but you just put your phone on do not disturb and shut your eyes again.

you had fallen alseep again, but it didn’t last as long as earlier, because you happened to hear a soft knocking on your bedroom door. shooting up into a sitting position, you scanned your room for a nearby weapon. who the fuck was in your apartment?

the answer came when a gentle voice, which you didn’t want to hear, followed the knocks.

“baby? are you in there?” and ever so slowly, the door pushed open. your body felt like it was made of lead as he stepped into the room. you forgot you had given him the spare key.

“oh, were you asleep? i’m sorry if i woke you, sweetheart.” he made his way over to your bed and sat himself on the side of it.

“yeah, i was asleep. it’s fine though, i needed to wake up anyways.” you mumbled out. he nodded before speaking again.

“what’s got you down? and don’t tell me nothing because i know you only take naps when you’re upset or it’s exam week.” he reached a hand out to take yours, gently stroking the top of it with his thumb.

“are you tired of me?” you blurred out, not quite answering his question, but to porco, that was enough of an answer that he got what was going on.

“no, no, no, baby. why do you think that? talk to me, honey.” his other hand that was not in yours, reached up to gently cup your face, encouraging you to speak.

“i dunno, you had to be not answering my texts for a reason.” you sniffled, tears coming to your eyes again today. when would they just stop and let you be happy?

“i’m so sorry, baby. my phone died today after i got called in for an emergency shift at work, and i didn’t have a charger at work. i promise you, i’m not tired of you. i was thinking of you the whole time i was working. i’d rather be with you then at that dump.” he gave a small squeeze to your hand. you squeezed back.

you had felt a little of the weight lift off your heart at his words, but you had spent so long today just overthinking and assuming you were right. the sadness wasn’t going to go away immediately.

“i’m sorry i overthink so much and always make you deal with it.” he just tutted and crawled on the bed to plant himself right beside you, pulling you into his chest.

“don’t you dare apologize. you know i care about you and have no problem making you feel more comfortable.” you felt yourself melt at his words and sink into his embrace. with every word he spoke, the thoughts in your head got quieter and quieter.

you closed your eyes and just listened to his heartbeat for a second before saying anything else. one of his hands reached up to your face and wiped the last of the tears away.

“thank you, porco.” you sighed and snuggled in even closer.

“you don’t need to thank me, this is what i’m here for.” a kiss is pressed to the top of your head, and you feel him shift. “now, how about i run to get stuff to cook for you and we can spend the rest of the night in?”

“you don’t have to, pock. i’m okay with just ordering a pizza or something.” you turned to him and pressed a kiss onto his nose before connecting your lips together.

“but i wanna.” he mumbled into your lips, not wanting to break the kiss.

you eventually reluctantly agreed, and decided to hop in the shower to melt away the rest of the day’s stress as you waited for him to return. he promised it would only be fifteen minutes max that he’d be gone.

the hot water running down your back felt like heaven. you could feel the knots in your neck and shoulders just dissolve under the heat. you were okay, not like earlier when you were wrapped up in despair.

you still felt tired and a little numb from the thoughts that polluted your head that day, but at least you no longer felt the need to cry. now you just craved the touch and comfort of your boyfriend, whenever he returned.

as you were getting dressed after your shower, you heard porco call out that he had returned from his shopping adventure. pulling his hoodie back over your head, you shuffled out to where he was unloading the groceries he had purchased.

when he saw you, he hurried to grab something he set aside and made his way over to you.

he got you a giant, cuddly teddy bear and some of your favorite chocolate bars.

“what’s all this for?” you inquired.

“i got it for you, to help cheer you up and kind of apologize for being irresponsible.” he scratched the back of his neck, a light red dusting his cheeks.

“pock.. i don’t know what to say. you really didn’t have to do this.” you took the bear from his hands and hugged it close to you.

“but i really wanted to, and it’s to make up for you being sad. whenever i’m not around, you can just hug the bear and pretend it’s me.” he set the chocolate aside on the counter and went to pull you into a hug, effectively squishing the stuffed bear between your bodies.

“this bear will never live up to the expectations of cuddling with you, pock.” you let out a small chuckle.

“well, then i guess i’ll just have to be sure to cuddle you as much as i can.” he pressed a kiss to your cheek.

“you won’t hear me complaining.” you leaned into him and pressed your lips together, craving his affection. “now, please cook for me, baby. i’m really hungry.”

you tried to give him the best puppy eyes you could muster. he laughed and gave you another quick kiss before pulling away and turning to the rest of the things he bought.

“of course, just make sure you sit there looking pretty and i’ll get right to it.” you finally felt a big grin form on your face, finally relaxed.

you hated that you could get so sad and insecure sometimes, but porco understood you, he didn’t judge you. you could always trust him to pick up the broken pieces when you didn’t feel okay.

[multiplefandomsblog]

Can i request how different idv characters would act as roommates? Eli, Helena, Luca, Edgar, Vera, Norton and Fiona if thats alright with you :DDD

warnings? kinda suggestive, crack fic, cussing

mod toby and mod bread helped me do this fic, its a bit all over the place but it was fun so no regrets

Eli Clark

I feel like being roommates with eli would be pretty pleasant

everything would be clean all the time

he’s the type of kid that everyone wants on their team because of how good he is at everything

so if you scored a roomie like him, you got super lucky

if you left a mess he wouldn’t get mad, he would probably just clean it up himself and leave a sticky note that said to clean up ur mess next time(but not like, passive aggressively)

ofc you would clean up after the cute sticky note, bc who can say no to this bb? 

If you don’t clean up tho, brooke rose will probably shit on your hair when u sleep

tbh you’ve always wondered what eli looked like without his eye mask

so one time when Eli was sleeping, you went next to his bed to try and take his eye mask off and see what he looks like.

You took off the mask and found out it was a dummy 

a few seconds later you heard footsteps and you turned around

Eli came up behind you and knocked you out with a bat

you two don’t speak of that day.

Brooke kept screeching last night, and you got no sleep at all, so I guess we’re having chicken for dinner 

Unless you had a good reason, then eli and brooke prob won’t mind cleaning up after u

I can imagine you going back to your shared room in the manor after a rough match and seeing eli just sweeping the room in an apron and a cloth covering his hair looking like cinderella

“Honey, I’m home!”

basically if you lived with eli, you basically had a husband/mom/wife???

If you came back to the manor, beaten up and bruised from the last match he would prob pester you and nag you

while cleaning up you wounds he would prob say, “You have to be more careful, im always worrying. You’re gonna give your mom a heart attack!”

seriously tho, don’t worry this bb, he would actually have a heart attack

Helena Adams

i think living with helena would probably feel like some sort of kdrama

she might be a bit clumsy and trip over a few things, falling into your arms bc of her blindness

though she might be doing it on purpose

If you moved things in the room without telling her, she would probably get mad

for example, you move the sofa chair a little bit to the right bc you thought it looked better

helena walks in the room, sits down on the sofa chair and ends up accidentally sitting on the sofa chair arm rest instead

resulting in her bottom hurting and a very long talk with you

she got her revenge weeks later

she had asked you to check under her bed for monsters because she couldn’t do it herself

you were teasing her for still being afraid of monsters but looked underneath anyways

low and behold, 

she put a mirror there.

will even wack you with her cane if you’re being annoying

Her cane is pretty affective in shutting you up lol only sometimes

“Hey Helena, are you braille? ‘cause i can read you like a book when i touch yo-” *wack* *moans*

helena: ...

you: ...

helena: ...im leaving

you: heleNA WAIT-

One time everyone at the manor was celebrating Helena’s birthday with a piñata, 2 seconds later she was beating the shit out of Luca with her cane

even after everyone’s been yelling that he wasn’t the piñata

One time you and Helena had a staring contest because you were both bored.

She won.

sometimes to get her close to you, you would sit on the sofa chair super quietly and still

And then you’d wait for her to come and sit on your lap thinking it was the chair

and it would work 

she would probably sit on your lap for a few minutes, confused as to why the chair felt elevated

and then she would feel your arms snake around her waist

and she would- “whAT THE FUCK- SCREEEEEEE”

she would probably make a cute bird noise and then just sit there, not knowing if she should leave or not

in her head, “THEIR LAP IS SO WARM OH MY GOD WHY DIDN’T THIS HAPPEN SOONER”

in real life, “let go of me you pathetic mortal”

you’d beg her to stay on ur lap longer and she would cave in

but she didn’t stay because she liked you! baka

Luca Balsa

living with luca will probably be the opposite of eli’s

messes, everywhere

inventions, everywhere

at one point though you had a sneaking suspicion he might be a bunch of rats.

 you saw him outside crouching beside you guys’ room with a bunch of rats coming out his sleeve and running into a crack in the building

“its for science!”

he’s also super scared of helena

Luca doesn’t like to admit it, but he got his purple eye from Helena after he made a bad pick-up line for the blind. 

She’s been chanting “one of us” and threatening to “finish the job” ever since.

he’s basically a big baby that needs to be taken care of

i feel like he might break down sometimes from not doing his invention right, or feeling insecure

but i guess his rats are there to help

but since he had a roomie, he wouldn’t be able to cry on his own

and its a good thing because he doesnt have to do everything by himself anymore

he learns to ask for help when living with you

you’d help him through his episodes and he would slowly start to become more reliant on you

if he was feeling a bit moody, he would unconsciously try to find you to cuddle with

if you lived with him, you’d probably have to be very responsible

luca would have his own bed that he would never sleep in because he wouldn’t be able to sleep without you in his arms

everytime he shifts in bed, you’d feel a tiny shock

it kinda bothered you so

you pranked Luca by touching him with those zappy ring things you’d get from a dollar store.

You just wanted that mother fucker to get a taste of his own medicine

he would basically be a puppy that follow you around, he would constantly old your head

probably refers to you as his

like if you downed a shot that barmaid made for you, he would be like, “EYYYY THATS MY BABy-heurghrhgh”

now you have a drunk baby that you have to take care of

You tried giving luca a shower afterwards, now you know how it feels getting electrocuted.

And trust me, Luca and water do not mix.

good luck have fun

Edgar Valden

living with edgar would consist of 

1. edgar being super specific of what was his and what you can’t touch

2. big tsundere baby

3. sketches of you hiding in his sketch book

if you lived with edgar, you’d have to be super patient with his nagging or else you’d have to find a new roomie

he’s constantly nagging you

but if you are tired of it and give him the silent treatment, he’d probably just nag you even more for attention

you need to give this man attention or else

you ignored him for a whole day once because he said something mean

he decided to give you some milk and cookies as an apology

the ‘milk’ was his muddy paint water and the cookies were expired

i feel like one day you two would be arguing about who moved his stuff, your argument being he unconsciously moved his stuff, his argument being you moved his stuff

you guys were so heated up you didn’t notice how close you two were getting

edgar ended up pouncing on you like a feral dog

though when you woke up, you both agreed that you ended up winning the argument

when you’re reading or just doing nothing, he’d ask to sketch you or paint you

i-its not because he thinks you’re beautiful or anything

its just because he thinks that your whole self is aesthetically pleasing and pleasing to the eye- but not because he thinks you’re pretty!

sometimes when he was super focused on his art, he wouldn’t notice your figure slowly approach him

you’d boop his nose and watch as he froze

wh- hoW DARE YOU LAY YOUR HANDS ON A VALDEN

secretly tho, he really loves it when you do that.

like

do it more

please or not whatever

Vera Nair

Vera would probably be a bit anxious when she heard she was gonna get a roomie

but she would do her best to be at her best behaviour

she’s very well mannered and is very polite

she’d kinda be the type to silently care for you

like, she’d notice the little things that bothered you and made sure they wouldn’t bother you ever again

like, if you stubbed your toe alot, she would give everything that you could stub your toe with, rubber covers or socks

but she wouldn’t tell you it was her even though it was obviously her

if you fell asleep on your desk instead of your bed, she would probably but a blanket on ur shoulders and a pillow underneath where you left your head

she’s the thoughtful type

before you went for matches, she’d give you a cheek kiss for good luck

and if you did the same, she would probably play it cool but then panic a second later.

theykissedmetheykissedmetheykissedme-

im sorry this is short idk what to do for her-

Norton Campbell

oh BOY

once norton starts to warm up to you, you guys are basically married

like there was no proposal, just “do you take this man to be your husband- you can’t say no”

he would probably take care of you alot

even when you didn’t need it

i can do it mysel- no

but actually, before he warmed up to you he was pretty cold, 

he felt himself growing feelings for you

and he didn’t want to because he was afraid he would lose you and he would have to go through the heartbreak of losing someone all over again

he would leave the room to go hang out somewhere else

he would keep his distance and not talk with you much

but there was this one time where you woke up with him around you, you just pretended you didn’t wake up and relished in the feeling

it took some time, but eventually he warmed up to you

though he still constantly worries about you, he doesn’t want you to get hurt

during matches he would always take hits for you, and just stay closer to you in general

he wanted to make sure you got back to the manor safely, it didn’t matter if he was sent back via rocket chair

he always put you as his #1 priority

he also gets jealous super easily, he’s scared someone will swoop you away from him

so to make sure everyone knows that you belong to him, he’d give you his clothes to wear

not only do his clothes look adorable on you, everyone will know that you’re his

probably pester you a lot if you tripped or got a paper cut

“yoU COULD HAVE DIED” “IT WAS A PAPER CUT”

Once, Norton got stuck to the fridge like a magnet for 5 hours

He’s been using that as an excuse to force you to bring him his snacks every since.

pick up lines are a definite yes

sometimes you’d be shitting and you’d hear outside the bathroom door a faint,

“My love for you is like Diarrhea.” “norton what the fuck im shitting-” “i just can’t hold it in” cue camera zooming in on his face and him smirking into the camera “OH MY GOD WHY”

like Luca, his bed is useless. he always needs you in his arms when sleeping, he wants to protect you and just feel you closer to him

puts him at ease

kisses? hell yes.

if you had to go to a match without him he would send you off with a ton of gross wet kisses on your face ew

He might even try to seduce you into staying

“norton I’m gonna lose morality points!” “fuck your morality points, i wanna smash”

Fiona Gilman

I feel like fiona would probably super psyched when she heard about sharing rooms with you

I headcanon her to be super bubbly and social but when she is alone with her thoughts she’d probably regret everything 

“why did i say that why did i say that why did i say that-”

probably prays to god, “please kill me”

she tries her best to make sure you’re comfortable

she doesnt make a big mess and she makes sure she cleans up after herself, overall a pretty cool roommate

except for those times for when she tries to babtize you while you’re showering-

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING” “THE LORD SHALL CLEANSE YOUR SOUL WITH HOLY WATER-” “what the f- iS THIS ALCOHOL???”

this has happened too many times^^^

one time she accidentally created an ultra portal in the toilet. 

Y’all still have no idea where it leads, and no intent of finding out. 

Although, Kreacher has been complaining of some nasty stuff appearing in his room

i feel like during matches she would always call you with her portals to say hi or just give you a small kiss

it stopped being cute when she went through the portal and ended up seeing the hunter instead of you

mentally scarred from that

sometimes things would disappear in your shared room too, not only the toilet

you’re convinced she has a bunch of hidden portals in the room

like, one time you dropped a pencil and it went through the ground.

you never saw it again

Or you know that missing sock?

Portaled.

i dont know what this turned into

[hottie0]

k so i had an idea for a chameron ao3 series of all the fics being conan gray songs but i got lazy and only wrote 1.5 stories for it so because i’m not acc gonna do it imma share the ideas i had cuz someone might find them useful so (btw these will be copied directly from notes the first time i wrote them, they can also be used for other ships if u want but i made them for chameron):

grow: a year after hs cam and charlie run into eachother in vermont and then u see a bunch of flashbacks of old nights and things at welton. they exchange numbers at the end or smth. (i did this one)

idle town: charlie can’t sleep at his new school. he reminisces and whatever. a little more focused on cam. he looks over at the other side of the room but cam isn’t there anymore. instead it’s his new roommate who he doesn’t even know the last name of. end it somehow.

generation why: pre-canon cam and charlie just talking on the roof. banter. romantics ensue on cams behalf. charlie doesn’t feel the same way. that’s why charlie treats him the way he does.

crush culture: charlie pining after cam. a bunch of little things cam does to push charlie over the edge. charlie talks to neil and neil says cam likes him too. he doesn’t. charlie kisses cam one night while studying and cam rejects him and they argue. this is the night of neils death. that’s why cam didn’t find out through charlie and everything hurt a little bit more than it should’ve.

greek god: cameron’s being made fun of all the time by charlie and he knows charlie likes him and idk tbh this one got deleted and idk what i had written

lookalike: pre-neils death cam and charlie dated in their time at welton then broke up which caused tension going into senior year. the dead poets knew. when the dps started charlie got a gf and wouldn’t stop talking about her. her name was elaine. he brought her to a meeting and she looks just like cam. damn.

the other side: falling out of love. the process.

the king: cameron accidentally reads a poem charlie had written for/about him. he stresses all day and acts weird. everyone else is like ??? at night cam decides f it and confronts him. it ends cute

comfort crowd: night time. tomorrow morning charlie was meant to leave welton so all his stuff was packed up. hed already punched cam so it was tense. to say the least. cam randomly gets up out of bed and charlie is like wtf?? cam fuddles around then he’s like “u coming” they go to the cave and have a meaningful talk and if they end up cuddling then that’s their business

wish you were sober: charlie and cameron get drunk in their dorm. cam can’t hold his alcohol well so he gets wayy more drunk. he tells charlie some personal shit. some of which includes the fact that he used to have feelings for charlie. charlie has feelings for cam. he’s sad and sends cam to bed.

maniac: short one. they’re at the same bar a few years later. not with eachother but cam knows charlie’s there. charlie is talking shit abt cam and calling him weird and blah blah. but just that night, charlie had called cam desperate after years. cam thinks abt everything. he gets up and leaves but doesn’t leave w/o saying a big ol’ f u to charlie. this ones so mean to charlie. sucks. anyways.

online love): they’re doing long distance because charlie got expelled. they break up over the phone. aw. make it depressing. maybe by them being interrupted before rly saying goodbye and shii.

checkmate: they’re playing chess idk i couldn’t think of anything better. just cute and fluffy cuz i say so.

the cut that always bleeds: cameron is in a problematic relationship w a girl he met at uni. they just went through one of their fight episodes. cam went back to his room but he needed company. he decides to go to charlie’s dorm for comfort. but they haven’t spoke since that evening years ago. charlie says “i thought i’d never see you again” yadda yadda cam tells charlie everything and they just hold eachother. the gf is like “plz take me back” so cam does and he never sees charlie ever again. cry abt it.

fight or flight: charlie has a gf but little does he know she’s cheating on him. he ends up catching her with her side piece in their apartment. it’s cameron. there’s a whole wtf moment and the gf is like “u two know eachother???”. cams like “i swear i didn’t know” the girl leaves but cam stays. they argue or whatever or just talk not sure yet. then they kiss and charlie says something dumb and it ends. also cameron is hot as shit in this btw.

affluenza: probs short. when charlie is getting ready to leave cam is like “so money can’t buy happiness” and charlie’s like tf did u say to me. they talk abt where charlie’s going and whatnot and money. “i can’t do the things you do charlie, don’t you get anything” charlie leaves feeling a bit more guilty.

(can we be friends?): cam and charlie’s life growing up together. cute moments of them falling for the other. “now charlie knows why he and cameron could never be friends.”

heather: charlie and knox are together. cameron likes charlie. one night charlie is drunk and it’s just cam and him in the dorm. charlie ends up kissing cameron as a joke and cameron doesn’t know. there’s a fic like this. after the kiss it’s never the same. knox doesn’t know what happened. cameron has to watch them be all buddy buddy and shit- even if they’re not out to the rest of the group, cam knows. cameron knows not to interfere with their relationship no matter how much he wants to. he chooses to sit and watch and keep all his feelings inside.

little league: charlie stops by a cafe one night because he has nothing else to do. it turns out it’s open mic night. someone gets up to read. that someone is cameron. cameron performs a poem called little league. charlie remembers things. he leaves before the poem is over. /OR/ Cameron is an adult, he's a doctor or smth bouj, he has a family, a house, the embodiment of the american middle aged straight white man dream life. But sometimes, in secret, he takes Welton's Yearbook out of the shelf, and he traces Charlie face, and he remembers.

the story: cameron and charlie are late-night swimming in the lake together. they’re fantasizing abt whatever and charlie says “we should run away” they continue the convo like they did the others. a few days later charlie brings it up again, seriously this time. “what? dalton are you on something?” no. they get into an argument and shit. about a week later cameron wakes up to charlie sneaking out, but this isn’t sneaking out like dps meeting sneaking out, he’s running away. cam: “charlie? what are you doing up?” charlie: “this is your last chance. you coming?” cam: *thinks* no.

fake: ratting on keating and more angsty mess

overdrive: first kiss moment. they’re meant to be studying but they got distracted and are just talking instead. charlie’s like “cam have u ever kissed sum1” cam: “i think u know the answer to that dalton” charlie: “do you want to” cam: “ha! that’s a laugh! who can i find within a mile of here that i could kiss” charlie: me. whole carpe diem whatever- “charlie are you kidding do you know what would happen if someone found out!?” “so i won’t let them” but they kiss and it’s cute

astronomy: au: cam never ratted out keating but neil still died but just that whole thing never happened. ok. ever since neil died both cam and char were different. their relationship was tense. before it had been perf and everyone was envious of them but after neil everything changed. cameron was more agressive and easily irritable. charlie was more reserved and quiet. they tried to fix it but they decided it would be best to split. they still saw eachother in hallways and stuff, but were no longer roommates. after a couple months, they were strangers.

people watching: a view on the cameron/charlie relationship from other people. they’re opposites obv. when ppl were first informed they were taken aback to say the least. but when they see how they are together they get it yk? yeah u do.

ur welcome for my genius guys u need it.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #459

“i wanted you to know that i love the way you laugh  /  i wanna hold you high and steal your pain away”

Does the person you like have any flaws? He's never seemed very expressive of what he feels. Has anyone ever given you a ring? Why? Yes. Because it was our anniversary and he wanted to, ig. If you ruled your own country, what type of government would it have? I'm not educated enough to answer this. Creation theory, Evolution or the Big Bang theory? I really don't know what I believe about the origins of the universe, but I do believe in evolution. Describe one of your most emotional farewells. The last time I saw Jason and we talked for a long time, and I finally got my closure. It was all so heavy. It started so stiffly, but it ended with us just chatting and smiling and, to my absolute shock, a hug from him. I'm getting emotional so NEXT QUESTION. What was your last serious conversation about? I was reassuring and comforting Sara about some stuff. Is there a city that you have a particular fondness for? If so, what city is it and why? No. Are there any gnomes in your yard? No. When was the last time you were stung by a bee? What kind was it? Years ago. A bumblebee. Are you gonna buy lottery tickets when you’re old enough? I am old enough, and no. The odds are way, way too small, and I don't really dabble in addictive behavior. Have you ever been into a real cave? No. :( That's a life goal, though. Have you ever posted mean comments on YouTube? I know I did once as a kid. It was regarding Meerkat Manor and I thought it was really disrespectful to Flower just because of the music chosen lmao. The drama. What color is your digital camera, if you have one? Black. If you had to spend one day in any movie storyline, which one would it be? Alice in Wonderland, I suppose? Name the strangest game you’ve ever played (video game or real game): Oh man, I've played waaaaay too many video games. I suppose Silent Hill with how confused it left me at first. Its concept is definitely wild. Parasite Eve is high on the list, too. In your opinion, what is the saddest movie you’ve ever seen? Boy in the Striped Pajamas destroys me. What is the best song to make out to? I could answer this but I'm not gonna lmfao Is there anyone right now that you are simply/overly infatuated with? story of my life ayyyyeeeee Who was the last person to play with your hair? Are they cute? Not a clue. Who was the last person close to you that died? Did you cry? Jason's mom. I sobbed on-and-off for days. Do you consider yourself a healthy person? Physically and mentally? No, in either way. Do you know anyone who owns a boat? My dad does. I'm sure others, too, with how popular fishing out on a boat is here. Do you know anyone who uses medical marijuana? I don't know. Even for medicinal purposes, it's not legal here. Do you know anyone who’s died in childbirth? No. What did you do for your 21st birthday? I was in the psych hospital, so... lmao. Therapy, reading, and coloring. Lots of reading and coloring. Because they did NOT fill your schedule enough there. We only had two group therapy sessions a day, and the rest was just... blankness. If dinosaurs could be tamed, would you want one as a pet? I know I'd be one of the dumb ones that absolutely wanted a tiny raptor, lol. Do you own more than one copy or edition of a book? No. If you could see any musical on Broadway right now, what would it be? Not interested. Do you eat soup when you’re sick? I don't like soup. If you read, which book or series did you enjoy most as a child? My first real series that I read religiously was Hank the Cowdog. Then it was Warriors. Do you buy Halloween candy when it’s on sale after the holiday? No. I really don't need candy available to me. Do you agree with the “they’re just being kids” excuse? It depends on what they're doing. In a lot of cases, no. Do you ever watch talk shows? No. Do you have a/any hero(s)? Mark Fischbach, Steve Irwin, my mom... Have you told your parents all of your secrets from when you were a teen? No. Though Mom has playfully once told me that she knows a lot of things I don't think she does, and that's terrifying lmao. You’re getting married. Who’s your maid of honor and best man? M.o.H.: Mom or Sara. Best man isn't my choice. Would you rather get highlights or dye your whole head? DYE IT ALLLLLLL. Are you wearing anything of any sentimental value? Describe? My friendship ring w/ Sara. It has a heart carved on the outside and "bitch" engraved inside so no one can see when you have it on, lol. She has one that says "jerk." It's a Supernatural reference. Who challenges you the most? In what way? My therapist and psychiatrist. They just help ensure I pursue my goals and give me little nudges forward to reassure me. Who seems to hold you back? In what way? PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT ME. I listen to my anxiety WAY too much. What was the last opportunity that you passed up, and why? Going up to Lake Gaston w/ Mom to visit Ash and her fam. They go there all the time, and it's a real nice place. I just didn't want to go because of the heat. Should there be an application process for having children? Hunny, that would not stop people from fuckin lmfao Name one thing that you think defines you as a person? m e e r k a t s What is a fear you have about living on your own? That depression would get the better of me and I'd neglect taking good care of my house. One of the many reasons I'll never live alone. Not at all saying I'd leave the responsibilities to my partner, but they'd be motivation for me to get stuff done. What’s the worst name your mom has ever called you? I don't know. Nothing that bad. What’s your stance on spooning? It helps me feel safe and loved and alsdkfjalwe I just love cuddling in all sorts lmao What’s your most recent obsession? Violet Orlandi & Melodicka Bros' cover of "Somebody That I Used to Know." Have you ever been scammed? Ha ha, yes. I once wanted to get Jason a Joker and Harley Quinn pillow from deviantART; talked to the artist, paid 'em, never got it. :^) Have you ever fostered an animal? No. I would get WAY too attached to foster. I wouldn't be able to give them up without breaking down, probs. Do you know anyone who acts way younger than what they are? I'm sure I do, but no one is coming to mind atm. Would you say you’re a pretty independent person? God no. Does the last song you listened to, remind you of someone? JASON. Do you currently want a new computer? Yes, actually. I want a desktop PC for better gaming quality, honestly. Also, the "escape" key doesn't work on this laptop, one key is missing so I have to hit the sensor JUST right, and it restarts randomly sometimes. I want a PC mainly because I want to get out of the habit of being on my laptop in bed all damn day. How would your parents react if you got a tattoo? I already have like six or seven, so they wouldn't be surprised. Is there anyone you can picture yourself being with forever right now? Maybe. Who is your truest friend? Sara. What is the strangest thing you’ve ever seen outside of your house? THIS house? Idk. Nothing that I'd consider odd. What bug frightens you most? STAG BEETLES lkadjslkfja;lwekjawl;kejrlawer Who is your oldest friend? That would be Sam, and he's in his mid-30s. How long have you known them? Many years. We met via WoW, which I've been playing since '14. I don't really remember how far into it we met, though. Where are they right now? lol I wouldn't know, he's all the way in Jersey. Plus we haven't talked in a while. Have you ever dated a friend of one of your siblings? God no, that would be so weird. What is the best gift someone can give you? An ear to listen without it feeling like a chore to them. Have you ever dated someone who had a child? No. I don't think I could do it. What is the last movie that made you cry? The The Lion King remake made me tear up. Have you ever played in a waterfall? No. Ugh, that sounds like a blast. In your life who has meant the most to you? Let's not get into this. What has been your biggest failure in life? Letting depression and my other conditions take away my identity, becoming my new identity. Do you trust yourself? No. I second-guess EVERYTHING and never know what I should listen to: my heart, my head, my gut... or which voice is what. Would you ever consider getting an abortion, under any circumstances? Yes. What was the last bug you killed? Some kind in the bathroom. Idk what it was. Just a little thing that sort of resembled an earwig, but not completely. Do you prefer profile pictures by yourself of with someone else? By myself, since it's my page. Do you know anyone who has written a book? I don't think so? Do you drink milk/juice from the carton if no one is around? Ew, no. I live with another person, and even if I didn't, what if I had guests? Has anyone ever told you they liked you in a realllly sweet way? Maybe? Has a member of the opposite sex ever given you jewlery? Jason has. Do you find sleeping in cars easy? NOOOOOOOOOO. I'm too scared to let my eyes close and not see what's going on on the road. Has a boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s parents ever gotten mad at you? Why? I don't believe so, no. What is the funniest thing a child has ever said to you. Definitely something my niece has said, but idr what it was. What’s been on your mind lately? Y'all know, lol. Do you feel like you need to get something off your chest? No. Sara was recently there for that. ♥ How would you react if someone told you they had feelings for you? Be very very excited if it was from a certain person.

[beecherdrysdale]

Hiii how are you ? I fell down the stairs today and cried for a minute straight #hormones. Dw I have a high pain tolerance but I just started sobbing lol. It happens. LONG post ahead, I kinda went off hehe.

Anyways let’s get started!! Yes quinton gets to be upfront because he would probably feel so uncomfortable(no offence) with all the sexual tension going on there if dyl or jamie were in the front hehe. But yes they would be bitchy about who gets to sit upfront “ no Jamie it’s mine turn to sit with Brigid” “ no it’s my turn dylan you just sat with her” so brigid would get fed up and banishes them to the back hehe. Lmao Brigid can we listen to Katy perry now? The silence!! And then no can we listen to Lady Gaga?. Quinton trying not to lose it in the front seat. If I had to chose tho I would chose lady gaga:) wbu?

Get ready to be beat! Yes Ryan is absolutely not sitting upfront w me! We would be crazy and I wanna win so. Quinner is sitting up front w me but he decided to be .... and I’m banish him to the back. Braden is the most chill so he’s sitting upfront and giving me directions!! Haha dyl yelling at you to drive faster, but no I will beat both hehe;). Kesh who’s sitting up front w you? Would Kirby be handsy😏?. We would have to make so many stops lol. Like it’s just nostalgic for us, but new for you so it would be fun to make pit stops. and we would just be taking so many Instagram photos as a group and w our boys and together ! We love that ! “Wait wait wait Lexi pull over, I remember this place I wanna take photos” lol this is bad hehe.

Lmao yes, your hair would be so tangled!! They would be panicking a bit because they’re like omg she’s gonna be so mad.... honestly Ryan would just take the photo and then post it but then Dylan would repost it and then Jamie and then me lol. Honestly I kinda love when people just take videos of being in the car w like the scenery showing, but this would include us laughing and listening to music! I hope they makes sense. Hehe Ryan or Dylan would probably take photos of Braden, cozzy and devon sleeping and would post it. Back to the hair: hehe yes I can see you giving them a death glare when you realize and your getting mad and would hide. I’m just imagining this in my head, like me pulling over and you running out of the car and quinton and devon fixing your hair lol. Somebody would be filming this no doubt.

Music wise, yes I love blasting music and people looking but it’s kinda a flex when they see who we are with.... I like rap too! What song do u like Brigid?. Country will be played and 2000’s which is fun! I’m good with anything !. Kesh I love hype up songs as well and bass heavy songs because they sound good on speakers hehe. I’ve been into Rihanna for the past week and I was working out to her music- where have you been, rude boy, bitch better have my money lol, pon de replay hit different but also S&M for some sexiness. Lmao sorry I’m just listing Rihanna songs that I love atm. What are your fav songs right now? Awww dancing on the side of the road is so soft, but everybody needs a dance break! Cozzy, Devon and Braden are some how still passed out, I admire that. Late night drives🥺 are we spicing this up 😏.

Hehe you and devon are swamped w emails and more and you’re like kirby can you please go w them we need somebody to watch them. Als yes quinton go take those hot photos . I admire Dylan’s sleep schedule, like good job on catching up on sleep. Kirbys just trying to sweet talk you and kiss you so that you wouldn’t be mad. All in all, kesh is just shocked like how is that possible? Lmao Brigid, Ryan and I w the shopping cart just stocking up on popcorn, chips m&ms, I love that. Jamie and Dylan are racing each other to see who can grab the most cereal and made sure that they are getting the correct ones for Brigid. Honestly all the boys are just confused about how grocery shopping works hehe. The crackhead energy. Kirby is panicking. We literally bought out all the snacks. Beaver tails are delish and I know where you can get them so 😃. I want to stuff Quinner’s mouth w beaver tails cuz that’s cute:) yes healthy food is a must, like fruits, veggies, rice cakes hehe. But remember that we are going to workout on this vacay hehe. After the grocery store we would go into the mall or something and the boys would just be wanting to buy video games 😂 and ps5’s. Also kesh I love how some of the boys are just trying on clothes. Why do I get a feeling that one of the boys would just be filming all of this?

The chirping will happen nonstop, I’m sorry it’s just to much inspo. Aww yes they are blushing real hard, cuz they like you soooo much. But Brigid is enjoying touching them so no prob.

The boat is a must and it is happening!! Hehe yes the tubing would be chaotic, everybody is just trying to get each other to fall in 😂. Ryan thinks that he’s getting away w pushing me in but SIKE you are coming with me. So then we’re just fighting in the water. Quinner would be like where did they go?. Hehe brigid gets so wrapped up in laughing at us that Braden pushes her in haha. Yes we all look super hot in our bikinis, and the boys are speechless! Like dyl and Jamie are just like wow, she looks so amazing! And Kirby is so in love w you, he’s like I’m the luckiest man ever. I’m still gonna make sure that I wear a non tie bikini so that it doesn’t untie, like one time I was in the boat and my friend pulled on the string and the entire thing untied and I just jumped in the water to retie. That is not happening again lol. Quinner would be mad hehe. Idk I’m seeing Brigid in a black bikini or maybe a dark blue one? It would match your eyes?. Kesh in a red one or yellow and me maybe in a green one or just black lol. Hehe yes kesh and Kirby are just doing cute couple stuff and keeping an eye out but we are to chaotic to maintain .

Hehe yes ig we are clingy but cute drunks but I get kinda wild when I drink so the body shots would def happen. It would be hot tbh. Yes somebody do body shots w Brigid. Dylan would step up first, and he would be enjoying it and then Jamie sees and is like no it’s my turn so he does it and in the end it’s just a competition and you all get drunk hehe. Kesh and Kirby are the parents of the clubbing trip no offence.. like wanna go help cozzy and devon? Hehe lol I could just be dancing w Brigid and the boys would get jealous and one of them would just come up and be like excuse may I cut in, and i would be like tf but then they give me a glare and I go dance sexy with Quinner or crazy w Ryan. Kesh and Kirby should dance at least at one point during this time. We all look hot btw :)

Hehe yay I can be friends w Dylan :) I want that friendship to happen tbh. but he’s getting jealous but I’m like let them have their moment, so I distract him a bit w talking.

Girls day is a must! I wanna hang out w you so badly. Some cute clothing will be bought! Ooo yes us modelling and them being in awe. Oo kesh a different modelling show w the boys 😏. The boys are getting handsy esp Dylan and Jamie hehe. And they are super protective so no other guy at the club gets any ideas. After tho it’s biker shorts, sweat pants and hoodies type of vacay lol .

Thank you for reading ! Hope you enjoy mes chéries💗🌸

yes ok so loooong post ahead people

oof that tough falling down the stairs lol. honestly i’m not doing to great right now bc i did not do as well as i wanted at my meet, so now i’m in a funky headspace. but hopefully answering this ask will help, and i can get my shit together before my events tomorrow (which are actually my important events)

haha yes dyl and jamie would just be arguing like “no it’s my turn to sit in front, no you just did it’s my turn” lmao. and then whenever they’re sitting in the front there’s just too much tension for quinton to deal with lol. so then i feel bad for quinton so i banish the other guys to the back and let him sit in the front hehe. and i’m just ignoring the other guys and refuse to play either of their music and i let quinton pick. and if we purposely pick songs we know the other guys hate, that’s a secret we’ll never tell. oof between those two idk, probably lady gaga, but again we’re not playing music jamie and dyl like lol. 

haha no, you get ready to get beat. i’m like an INSANE driver when i want to be. and ofc dylan is just yelling at me “faster brigid, hurry tf up! we have to beat everyone” so then we’re just zooming. but then obviously you’re doing your best to keep up so you have to banish ryan to the back so he doesn’t distract you. and then you let quinner sit up front until he starts getting too handsy bc you’re like no i won’t let myself get distracted. so then braden’s up front giving directions and trying to get you to go faster, but i’m still winning lol. and then kesh is also still in the race, and she and kirby are just chilling in the front bc everyone else’s asleep. ooooh yes making lots of pit stops bc nostalgia for all of you canadians. and then me and kesh are just seeing all the sights for the first time. oooooh yes all the cute insta pics we could take

ooooh yes people taking vids of like the music and scenery would be so cute to post as stories. and ofc all of us laughing and stuff, that would be so cute. anyways yes, my hair would be a hugeeee knot. and i would just give them the death glare, like you’ve got to be fucking kidding me. and jamie and dyl just try to hide from me, like they run away as soon as the car is stopped. and then devon and quinton fix it for me, god bless their souls. like i’m sorry, bc even i wouldn’t want to deal with that. ik how my hair can get. and this would be allllll over everyone’s stories ofc lmao

ok yessss our music game is on point tbh. ok so for rap, the artists i’m really into rn are juice wrld (rip i actually loved him sm), kid laroi (who learned from juice, so he sounds a lot like him), trippie redd, mgk, and nf. also iann dior, but he’s not so much rap as r&b. honestly any of their songs slap. and then ofc country and early 2000′s. and any music with good bass, but i think a lot of the artists i said have that. ooooh yes getting out to have a dance party on the side of the road. hehe it could be really crazy. or alternatively, it could be when you’re out on a late night drive and there’s a slow song on the radio and you guys just get out and slow dance to the song together no this is not at all inspired by the song slow dance in a parking lot anyways yes late night drives are so cute. but then of course they can get spicy 😏 in case you couldn’t tell i’m always down for it to get spicy lmao

haha yes quinton and dylan c. honestly have their priorities straight. and devon and kesh are swamped with director duties, so that leaves kirby in charge. so then ofc when we get home kirbs tries to sweet talk kesh, but she’s just not having it. she’s just like how? anywaysssss at the store we have the most duo of ryan and lexi, plus now i’m added into the mix, and it’s just a mess. like we buy a shit ton of popcorn, pretzels, chips, candy, etc. and we literally bought half the store’s supply of everything lmao. and then dyl and jamie are just in the cereal aisle trying to grab as much cereal as they can. whichever one of them gets we chocolate mini wheats i will love forever. and then kirby’s getting healthy food bc yk he’s trying to be responsible. so then kesh has to explain that his whole job was to make sure everyone else was getting healthy food, not just get it himself lmao. but honestly none of the guys actually know what they’re doing lmao. and then we obviously have to get beaver tails to so lexi and quinner can have a moment, but idk where you get those lol. but yes we will be working out a ton on this vacay, so it’s ok that we have sm junk food lol. and then after we’re done with food, the guys decide to wander the mall and then they just buy a ton of video game and then they’re trying on clothes lol. and yes obvi they’re videoing the whole thing bc they’re secretly middle school girls who want to have a blog lmao

hehe yes me getting chirped the whole trip, esp the boat day. and the guys are getting so embarrassed about it, but i just don’t care lmao. and then the whole boat day is so chaotic obvi. when ryan pushes lexi in, quinner will come back and just be confusion lmao. like where’s lexi. and then i’m dying laughing and then braden sneaks over and pushes me in lol. but yes we all look amazing in our bikinis. like kirby is just so in love with kesh and thinks she looks gorgeous 😍 and then dyl and jamie are just like damn you look hot about me lol bc we’re horny ones on this trip apparently. and i’ll wear a tie-back jolyn bc they actually stay on lol. and then ofc quinner thinks lexi looks super good, but then she tells the story about the last time she wore a tie-back and he’s just like why didn’t you do it again? lmao. ooooh for bikinis i like a black top with a print on the bottoms idk why. and then you guys in whichever color you want. also yes kesh and kirby are trying to be responsible during this, but it’s just not working lol

haha yep i can definitely see you and quinner being wild drunks together (it’s more like when the alcohol is wearing off that you guys get really clingy) so obvi you guys start doing body shots. and ofc it turns into a jamie/dyl competition bc what doesn’t? and then me and lexi are just dancing sexy together, yk like two drunk girls do, and then dyl or jamie tries to come over and cut in and at first you won’t let them but then you finally give in and go dance with quinner instead. and then yeah, no offense kesh and kirby, but y’all are the parents here. like making sure we don’t do anything too too dumb lmao. and also being a wingman for some of the other guys. but you guys def dance together at least a little bit too. and obvi we all look hot

yessss i feel like you and dyl could be super chaotic friends too. so the two of you are just chilling together and then you have to distract him lol, but then after that you have a different chaotic friend for when ryan’s not available lmao

yes yes yes, girl’s day would be so fun. and then we get a ton of cute new clothes so obvi we have to model them. and they’re all just in awe, like those are our girls. but then we also do private modeling shows 😏 and we all know how that ends. and then when we’re in our clubbing clothes obvi they are getting super protective over us bc we look so hot and we’re their girls, so no other guys can get ideas. but then once they’re drunk they’re handsy as hell lol. but then the rest of the vacay ends ups spent in hoodies, sweats, and athletic shorts lol. and obvi some of the guys’ clothes

ughhhh i love this, the whole thing was amazing. 10/10

[dreamsafterhours]

college boyfriend!markhyuk au series: III (mark’s pathway)

a universe in which roommates!markhyuk meet each other's s/o in class

markhyuk are roommates, my/n and dy/n are roommates, mark and dy/n take classes together and so do donghyuk and my/n — how will their fates intertwine?

genre: fluff pairings: mark+my/n (fem), donghyuk+dy/n (fem), platonic!mark+dy/n, platonic!donghyuk+my/n format: dotpoint AU universe: non idol, college bf warning: some swearing

masterlist

or click here to meet your soulmate, paediatrics!donghyuk!

II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV

III: 별빛이 내린다 샤라랄라랄라라 (2+2=4)

the meeting of two souls: mark & my/n

hi hello good day how are you? i hope you're well today/tonight this is like 3 weeks late isn't it :D pls don't come after me i lost some motivation to write for a while but here i am now so let's get to it!!

aight so you met donghyuk's roommate for the first time yesterday and,,

you honestly had NO IDEA someone could be that cute

highkey regretting not asking for his name but you were so caught up in lingering on the fact that he implied you were pretty , like wHO DOES THAT ASDFKJL

you highkey shouted the verbal equivalent of a keyboard smash with ur roommate and she was all !! oh so this guy cute cute

you were contemplating whether or not to sneakily ask donghyuk for his name but you were worried bc hyuk has,, crazy sense when it comes to reading people and seeing through their words

and honestly you didn’t want to have to deal with hyuk potentially teasing the shit out of u for having a maybe crush on his roommate whom u’d just met

so you just beat your pillow sleep on it after your roommate reminds you it’s getting late and no life decisions should be made after 12am!! live by it

you wake up craving jjajangmyeon but alas if you were to get any satisfaction of that kind of hunger, it was going to have to wait because

~~ we love ~~ packed schedules ~~ in this house ~~

i hopes the sarcasm was noted in that previous sentence bc now u wish for life to cease

4 weeks into the semester and you were drowning in the midst of reports and lab pracs and content and revision

you were ready to ascend to the next life with only regret and an ability to vaguely explain the properties of a prokaryotic cell and endosymbiosis

but honestly donghyuk’s been a big help throughout the past month

your only friend in classes

official study buddy

2am revision session consultant

personal older brother bc he claimed you as his adoptive sister

another reason your roommate told you to go to bed was bc you literally have

a tutorial class + 2 consecutive 1.5 hour lectures + a 3 hour lab class to finish your day off

with no break for lunch in between :’((

looks like you’ll be starving through your library study session with dy/n

but oop

you find that dy/n had stayed up long after you’d fallen asleep writing her essay 

leaving your dorm feeling a twinge of guilt that u might have distracted her from focusing on her work to listen to your rambles and kept her up later than she should have been

but a text from her in the afternoon reassures u that honestly she wasn’t even planning to write that essay and The Feels™ had just hit her last night and that she made it to class

you: oh PHEW that’s good

you: sorry i didn’t wake you up on my way out, u looked so peaceful i couldn’t bear to disturb

dy/n 🦁: dw dw it’s all g i made it n e way

dy/n 🦁: also is it cool if my friend and his friend comes to the study sesh as well we have to go through some lecture content

you: ah yes don’t see why not :)) i’ll probs have my earphones in the entire time anyways lmao won’t affect me

but will it

“who u texting in the middle of diffusion” cue hyuk peering over at the phone you’re hiding in your lap

you click your tongue at him and lock your phone, “someone twice the man you’ll ever be”

he gasps in mock horror like he’d just witnessed a murder as quietly as he can ,,

“you’re texting a guy? in the middle of diffusion?”

“no. my roommate lmao”

“and what? is it me or your roomma—”

“—my roommate” you glance back up at the prof without looking at him

“ouch”

“you dare?”

“if i don’t dare, who will”

and due to this exchange, you miss the osmosis slide

“ah shit what was osmosis again”

“lmfao what makes u think i know that”

(pause)

“isn't it just.. net movement of free water molecules from an area of high concentration to an area of low concentration”

sorry my bio neural pathways are being excited again after being revisited for the first time in two years

/stares at him/ “why was that infuriating to hear from u”

after class you prepare to head to your dreaded 3-hour lab class you have with donghyuk but he stands up and stares into the void blankly

“where am i going”

“where do u think”

“oh, hell, most likely”

you scoff at the accuracy and drag him out of the lecture hall

you look at donghyuk and he’s visibly resisting the urge to poke your cheek when he first puts on his gloves

“what’s with you today”

he stares at his hands forlornly, “idk ask that to my timetable”

“week 4 got u dead huh”

he glances at you with a frown, “don’t act like u’re not dying too”

“damn. touché”

to your dismay, the lab class runs later than scheduled and you get out of it 20 minutes after it was meant to finish but luckily it’s your last class

with a quick goodbye to donghyuk and a text letting dy/n know you were going to be a lil late, u stop by ur dorm to pick up ur textbook before rushing to the library

you were highkey exhausted and just. famished by that point

but a promise is a promise and you weren’t going to back out of one now

especially when you felt like you owed your roommate one and it was you who originally suggested a library session

so you get to the library, bag strap slung over your shoulder, checking the photo of the seats dy/n had saved for you in the library

highkey getting lost once or twice but you manage

you get to the general area and spot dy/n sitting at a four-seater (wow how’d they get that) but you

freeze when you see who’s sitting next to her

it’s ??

????????

????????????????

/error 404/

????????????????

????????

ur heart goes into panic mode bc

it’s not even kidding it’s donghyuk’s roommate

and despite ur brain short-circuiting

you manage to remember that dy/n had said that mentioned her friend’s.. roommate.. also coming along..

and if her friend was donghyuk’s.. roommate..

you: :                             )

you: oh my god they were roommates

and speak of the devil

“oh hey fancy seeing u here”

you turn around and it’s donghyuk legit chills right there

you barely reply a “hi”

“i thought u were going to ur dorm for dinner”

“ah yeah—no i’m.. gonna go over some.. diffusion”

“oii! over here dude” his roommate whisper-yells out at donghyuk

dy/n waves at you “heYY my/n”

donghyuk waves and turns back to you “welp i’m gonna join a study group.. you could join if you came alone? i’m sure they won’t mind”

“about that”

“u waiting for someone?”

“i’m going over there too”

“what?”

he glances over at the table and then back to you

“that’s my roommate. right there next to your roommate”

you point her out and then donghyuk’s jaw drops

“what the fUC—” and you both. burst iinto laughter at the ridiculousness of the situation

like ?? how???

“wOW r u KIDDING”

“HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN”

“talk about a coincidence.. oh my god my cheekbones hurt” he says as he clutches his side

so you get to the table and dy/n tries to introduce u to donghyuk’s roommate

“mark, this is my/n, my/n this is mark”

ah yes so mark is his name, you think

cute name for a cute boi

“nice to meet you again, mark”

dy/n: “?? again?”

mark gives u a rlly wide smile “yeah we’ve met. hi my/n”

you swear you’ve never had your heart flutter like this

fdksoafjadgioarigilf

then mark introduces dy/n to donghyuk and they start talking about how they’re your legal guardian and telling the other to “get in line”

leaving you in middle like “ok mum and dad” but also thinking back to when donghyuk was highkey flirting with you,, and now how he’s flirting with dy/n ,, oh dude he’s flirting

and highkey ,,, you don’t have any hard feelings about it ,, you know she’s also got this kind of humour code and she’s far more comfortable with meeting new people

until dy/n jokes about custody rules and donghyuk replies with “who says we’re split”

ok mum and dad

n e ways you came to study and study you will

so you settle down and go through your notes for the day

albeit being a lil distracted by mark who sits right across from you somehow, somewhy,,

somewhy should be a word you can’t tell me how to english

you keep wanting to steal glances at him but you have to physically restrain yourself from doing so

and also donghyuk who keeps poking u under the table and texting u even though he’s right next to you

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

you: wHAT

💩hyuk: nvm lol

you: im boutta slap u. give me my pen back i saw that

💩hyuk: damn

💩hyuk: also r u hungry

you: terribly

you: why

💩hyuk: does ur roommate have any allergies

you: not that i know of

you: again

you: why

you: u buyin?

💩hyuk: 🤡<- you

💩hyuk: 🤡, how do you feel about dinner

you: invalid question. no variable answer

💩hyuk: alright, 🤡. im not buying for u

you glower at him but he isn’t looking at u,, he leans back and laments about how he’s craving chinese food

did he read your damn mind how did he know

and apparently he’s read dy/n’s mind too at how she jumps up at the mention of chinese and agrees profusely

so you find yourself abandoning your studies for the rest of the night and in a restaurant lmfao

“chill,, guys,,, jjajang is fine”

rock paper scissors for the cheque ends in mark’s tears

“no it’s ok. i’m ok it’s our first meeting as a fateful group and it makes sense! for me to pay”

after you satisfy your cravings the boys walk dy/n and you back to your dorm

mark tells dy/n to give him her bag for him to carry and while she practically gives it up to him, he has to insist that he’ll carry yours too

to which you’re like omg no it’s fine i can carry it it’s not that heavy i swear—

until donghyuk takes ur bag off ur shoulder and passes it to mark

because of the narrow path, you’re forced to walk in pairs and you end up walking next to donghyuk who makes happy sounds about how good that food was and how priceless mark’s face was when he lost rock paper scissors

then dy/n takes the initiative to make a group chat for you four,, asking for donghyuk’s number to add

you give her a look like damn gurl but you have no idea if she saw or if she just ignored you on purpose lmfao

also donghyuk looked way too happy afterwards

either way you slapped her when you got back to the dorm like “SINCE WHEN WERE YOU SO ?? BRAVE?”

dy/n: um

dy/n: honey

dy/n: have you met me

and thus the chaos of a group chat was born and just like a real child, you spent hours on it

dy/n 🦁: ok we inside

you: thanks for dinner again mark!

💩hyuk: he says you’re welcome

💩hyuk: i say we “accidentally” lose our purses next time we go out

you: nah you’re paying next

💩hyuk: y

💩hyuk: y, 🤡

dy/n 🦁: yes y, 🤡

dy/n 🦁: HAHAH WHY IS SHE 🤡

💩hyuk: i thought you of all people would know

dy/n 🦁: why is she just as dumb in class as she is in the dorm?

💩hyuk: i knew it

dy/n 🦁: she poured too much hot water into her tea the other day it overflowed and spilt onto her foot

mark: oh no were u okay

💩hyuk: looks like you’re gonna have to study osomsis

💩hyuk: osmoiss

💩hyuk: fuck

you: yes i’m okay it wasn’t that hot i had socks on too

💩hyuk: osmosis

dy/n 🦁: avoided tragedy luckily

💩hyuk: finally

you: there is a reason you’re saved as 💩hyuk on my phone

dy/n 🦁: HAAHAHAHAHHAHAH

seriously you just don’t know just how much this group was going to mean to you yet

click here to meet your soulmate, paediatrics!donghyuk!

II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV

shoot me an ask if you’d like to be tagged in future parts!

[lovenliterature]

evermore thoughts

willow

I wasn’t sold on this on first listen but I really liked it on second listen with more attention to lyrics

video is also really lovely, big fan of that

really really like the difference in melody for the diff appearances of “life was a willow and it bent right to your wind”

favourite lyric: “I come back stronger than a 90s trend” - the look she does at the camera cemented this as my fave line even more

champagne problems

down as one of my faves from the start

love love love the narrative

proper late night with cider, melancholy vibe

kind of like a grown up/worse feeling august in terms of vibes?? as in like the experience described feels like a more intense heartbreaking august in a way

really like the conclusion too

favourite lyric: I really struggled to pick here but: “you booked the night train for a reason/so you could sit there in this hurt” for sheer visceral emotion, “dom perignon you brought it” for the way its sung, “How evergreen, our group of friends/Don't think we'll say that word again” and “she’ll patch up your tapestry that I shred” for lyricism

gold rush

again, one i wasn’t super sold on the first listen, music and the vibe didn’t really interest me

first notes made me think of epiphany

but then i listened to it watching the lyric video and holy shit

now v appreciative of the melody and bass and the pace of the lyrics

really really like her embracing talking about jealousy

love love love the ending and beginning being the same holy shit

favourite lyrics: “at dinner parties, I call you out on your contrarian shit” and the way she sings “with your hair falling into place like dominoes”

‘tis the damn season

again preferred on second listen, wasn’t on the list of early faves

the best xmas late night walks vibe, walking through frosty streets at home between houses, embracing the only time you get to think, losing yourself in music and nighttime with freezing hands and cloudy breath

would’ve fit my 2019 xmas vibe too

melancholy and nostalgia

favourite lyrics: “sleep in half the day/just for old time’s sake” and “and the heart I know I’m breakin’ is my own”

tolerate it

god girl you deserve better

kinda like a sad last great american dynasty in terms of searching for approval

naive innocence taken advantage of

drunk in my garden walking round to try and forget my life kinda vibe

favourite lyrics: “i know my love should be celebrated/but you tolerate it” and “now I’m begging for footnotes in the story of your life” 

no body no crime

holy shit did i sleep on this at first but oh my god its so good

start gives me show of hands vibes which is great

her husbands acting different and it smells like infidelity - just the way she sings this is so so fucking good

this is the easiest song to listen to and holy shit its just great

favourite lyric: “she said “that ain’t my merlot on his mouth/that ain’t my jewellery on our joint account”

happiness

“all the years I’ve given/is just shit we’re dividin’ up” - v v true, you have to rebuild your life after every relationship and taking it all apart is so much more sudden than building it up

like an alternative to the 1 which I LOVE

but also some parallels to this is me trying: “I hope she’ll be a beautiful fool..... sorry I didn’t mean that” vs “my words shoot to kill when I’m mad”

the whole bridge is iconic - “I can’t make it go away by making you a villain” - in the short term, anger at an ex can help, but eventually you have to move on, and its easier to accept that there was good in the relationship after a while, and it makes looking back on it better

“no one teaches you what to do/when a good man hurts you/and you know you hurt him too” - blame on both sides is much harder to take and grieve and its hard to know how to cope with that. it also makes advice more complicated because there isn’t much you can say to help

favourite lyric: “both of these things can be true” - always love duality and nuance in literature and its nice to hear it acknowledged in a climate of binary oppositions and no shades of grey

dorothea

nostalgia for the future

now prob my most listened, gets stuck in my head and one of the few i do listen to in isolation - like august

Reminds me so much of Ella - each other’s history, not each other’s whole future but in there somewhere

again sapphic vibes, real strong esp because of the ella vibes its the whole in between romantic and platonic affection

“hey dorothea, do you ever stop and think about me” - that’s the way I think of people I love esp ella and people from that era of my life, and anyone where its kinda open ended or just grown apart

favourite lyric: “and damn dorothea, they all wanna be ya”

coney island

instant fave - marked down from first listen and probably still one i actively look forward to 

much like with exile, the male vocals GOT me

“did I shatter you” that line broke my goddamn heart

favourite lyrics: both for the sheer feelings of the vocals and the lyricism “were you standing in the hallway/with a big cake, happy birthday/did I paint your skies the darkest grey” and “and when I got into the accident/the sight that flashed before me was your face”

ivy

the way she sings goddamn could be the whole fucking song its so beautiful

“my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand/taking mine, but it’s promised to another” - the passive here is great

“he wants what’s only yours”

the trilogy of these lyrics “what would he do if he found us out?”, “he’s gonna burn this house to the ground”, “and drink my husband’s wine”, the recklessness, the drinking his wine like a secret defiance

“my house of stone/your ivy grows/and now i’m covered in you” - fucking hell this is the best imagery - even with the strongest walls and foundations, the love crept through and grew inside her til she was covered in it

favourite lyric: quite literally just the words “oh, goddamn”

cowboy like me

“dancin’ is a dangerous game” - hell yeah I get so many feelings from this, it just reminds me of the intimacy of dancing and the feeling of swaying in someone’s arms

“and the skeletons in both our closets/plotted hard to fuck this up” - both like active interference of exes or just simply trauma, unresolved issues

“forever is the sweetest con” - believing hurts and everything ends but its worth it for the time you have

favourite lyrics: “now you hang from my lips/like the gardens of Babylon”

long story short

first notes make me think of between the saltmarsh and the sea even though its SO different but also a bit like august idk why

“if the shoe fits walk in it/til your high heels break” - i just love the imagery of this line

“fell down the rabbit hole” - living for this line and the wonderland vibe

“but if someone comes at us, this time i’m ready” - the vibe of like not looking for a fight but defending what you love

favourite lyric: “past me/I wanna tell you not to get lost in these petty things” - YES BITCH also the energy I give to past me and future me gives to me now or “long story short I survived”

marjorie

another song I come back to on its own

this is the exact wistful vibe i look for in calm ish songs, can be sad, can be happy depending on a mood and this is perfect

the video is incredible and marjorie providing the backing vocals made me cry also it being in the same place on the record as epiphany was on folklore

“never be so polite/you forget your power/never wield such power/you forget to be polite” - love the use of wield, it also feels like the medium women try to find between being a “bad bitch” and being ladylike, but not a medium society will accept bc fuck that, the exact way THEY wanna do it instead

really the song i needed after the year of so much grief, and i know it’s gonna bring me comfort when grandma goes, especially the line “what died didn’t stay dead”

favourite lyric: “watched as you signed your name: marjorie” - the way this is sung will literally stay with me forever, its like a legacy in one line

closure

again, instant fave

the vibe of you don’t owe someone shit just bc they feel guilty is so good

“yes I got your letter/yes I’m doing better” “I know that it’s over” - I’ve moved on and I don’t need your permission for that or your well wishes thanks

Moving on doesn’t mean forgiveness

I just love the melody so much and its such a good song agh

favourite lyric: “I know I’m just a wrinkle in your new life/staying friends would iron it out so nice”

evermore

“grey november/I’ve been down since July” - most explicit pandemicy vibes i get, I was home and it was almost possible to just regard it as a normalish summer, looking after the dog and living at home and now its coming up to Christmas and I’m living away from home, our family is split across 5 homes in 4 cities and its fucking hard (not even sure if its that type of down but that’s how it made me feel)

“writing letters/addressed to the fire” - literally just picked up on this lyric and has kinda a dual meaning for me. 1 -feeling shit about things you create, putting in effort, just to throw it away. 2 - tactic for tackling anxiety, just getting rid of thoughts and releasing them from my brain

“Cannot think of all the cost/And the things that will be lost/Oh, can we just get a pause?” - again, v pandemicy and so relevant to the fam’s 2018-2019, we just needed a pause, we had to keep going and not process what we’d lost or we’d never carry on

such a good depression song

favourite lyric: “staring out an open window/catching my death”

[idontwanttowhy]

Review: Holiday Love ホリデイラブ (2018)

A frustrating Fatal-Attraction-esque jdrama

Synopsis

Takamori Azu (Riisa Naka) has been leading a seemingly perfect life with her husband, Takamori Junpei (Takashi Tsukamoto) and their daughter Nanaka. However, her world crumbles when she is told that Junpei has been cheating on her with a part-time co-worker, Izutsu Rina (Matsumoto Marika)--by Rina's husband, Izutsu Wataru (Nakamura Tomoya) no less. To make matters worse, she discovers that Rina won't let go of Junpei and is doing everything in her power to destroy their relationship. A rollercoaster of betrayal, mistakes, and obsession ensues.

AC Overall: 8/10, be prepared to be mad

So this drama is about people being unfaithful in their marriages and the tolls that takes on themselves, their relationships, and their families--and ultimately how they dealt with it all. I was very frustrated throughout the drama, partially because of the cheating and partially because of how everything panned out. But what kept me watching was the mistress, Rina's, plans to be with Junpei, despite both his wife's efforts and her husband's efforts to separate them. Be prepared for Fatal Attraction-level obsession. Matsumoto Marika did a great job playing the obsessed, unstable mistress. Give it a watch for the mess of it all, from will-they-won't-they get back together drama and possible revenge cheating, to unhealthy obsessions and extreme ~moves~ because of it. Some of it was predictable, but the execution was creative at times. And it's pretty short, good for a binge.

AC Review (Spoilers, and very long)

Ngl, this drama had me Fuh-RUS-TRA-TED practically the whole time. Bc I 1) could not understand Junpei for cheating and 2) tbh still don't understand how and why Junpei had two women who wanted to be with him. But I digress. Actually no, this whole review is going to be a digression. First ep we see Junpei fucking some other woman and they talking about "I wish I had married you" and love and blah blah blah. Which makes it decidedly not an "I fucked up and my dick slipped" situation. Not that the latter is better bc they're both shit. Idk if it's better if someone "slips up" because of a lack of control, or a strong love towards someone else. Jury's still out. But Junpei whispered sweet-apparently-nothings into this woman's ear for a YEAR, and dead acted like nothing was going on at home. And then had Rina assed out in front of his wife and her husband talking about "I didn't say all that" like suuure want receipts? So ultimately everything was his damn fault. Anyway. My girl Azu, blessherheart, was completely blindsided when Rina's (very attractive though also very abusive but very attractive and why would you want Junpei over him but yeah he's abusive so I get it but if he wasn't then...) husband showed up with a beat-up Junpei talking 'bout "he's fucking my wife, what are we going to do?". And poor Nanaka! The children in both marriages suffered the most bc they really were just innocent bystanders who got caught up in the bull and will probably have some trauma because of it. Like Nanaka was such a happy spirit but got depressed when she lost all her friends! My heart really went out to her.

Anyway anyway. So my girl Azu did the right thing at first--had Junpei's ass sleeping in the car and everything, which I loved, and was determined to divorce him. But then she got tricked into (almost) sleeping with a Japanese Micheal Cera (simultaneously old- and young-looking somehow) by a client-like gurl. I was proud that she stopped it (and he didn't continue without consent) but like, her sister and best friend's response was like "how could you (almost) fuck a stranger" and I'm sitting here like "she was drunk? he was blackmailed into this? she thought she knew him at least a little? and she realized she didn't want to and didn't actually have sex with him? and where was this energy when they found out about Junpei??". And then the best friend proceeded to give shit advice, talking about "don't tell Junpei, it'll ruin his ego" when realistically, she shoulda just told him the minute she decided she wanted to be with him still (which I'll discuss later) bc they were split up at the time, and he did (arguably, though maybe not, still depends on the person's pov) worse. But no, he found out through the mistress (of course!) and thus put Azu in purgatory. Her flip in the decision to be with him again was because he had always been there...which I get (prob bc of my scorpio sun) but ughhh I wish she hadn't welcomed him back so easily. Like yeah, say you still want to be with him, sure, but make him sweat at least a little more? Make him beg? act different? idk. She made him feel too comfortable too quick, which made him feel more entitled to being upset about her and JMichael Cera talking about "I know I shouldn't be mad, kedo..." and making my girl Azu sad, which leads me to...

THE MISTRESS. with her baby voice. wtf. And Junpei couldn't keep his dick in his pants even after all the shit. I mean, they didn't fuck but dude was acting sus again around her, which was just more fodder for her in the end. (His only other female co-worker watching and knowing everything was me the whole time. Like, you dumb, dumb man). He was waaay too nice after all the shit, letting her into his dorm and letting her do him favors so he felt guilty and letting her try to talk him into leaving his wife. I was sooo mad that after all the mess, Junpei still didn't grow any balls to say to her, point-blank, "I'm not leaving my wife, please leave" until way too late for me. And she really, and i mean REALLY, went out of her way to get Azu to cheat and molded him like putty. I had no faith in Junpei. Throughout the whole thing. Dude is spineless. And...so was Wataru, but in the macho-man kind of way. Controlling to hide his insecurities. Violent for no reason (did we need the r. scene? fuck) But in the end, he was the one that caved the least when it came to the cheating, trying to figure out what happened, and taking concrete steps rather than the wishy-washy moves Azu and Junpei were making. And then he grew as a father after kicking Rina out, because then he spent time with the kids (after his mom said she had a life lol) and they ultimately chose him in Tokyo which was super interesting and redeeming...wait wait wait but he was still very abusive and there is no excuse for that. I really had to stop myself--whenever he wasn't yelling at grown ass adults and breaking shit--from thinking that he was a good person. The struggle. But this man really said everyone's dumb, and I low-key agree. I could understand him the most (though it doesn't excuse anything, ik ik). But I would've changed the locks too.

We gotta talk about the best friend too. I watched on viki with the comments, so throughout the show people were like "oh they should be together" and shit, which had me kinda tight because I really appreciate when shows allow for platonic friendship between a cishet- man and woman? Esp without one professing their ever-present love to the other. Dude gave shit advice but ultimately was the only one thinking straight and suspecting Rina was behind it all. And then actually doing the groundwork to prove it. And he sent her new clients when the news of the affair broke and everything. And and he had Nanaka's approval. Honestly there wasn't anything to dislike (except the shit advice...).

The ending tho, was the kicker. Homegirl put on a whole play for the company and really sought to end his life. I expected something, bc how could someone as obsessed as she was just back off? (and he deserved it bc Junpei didn't sacrifice enough for me, got around everyone knowing about his affair but had his wife's business out on the street, didn't have to lose his job like he was supposed to, etc...) but I didn't expect a performance. The flair. A1.

This show didn't necessarily have me gasping (except for that scene)--more like "wow I saw that coming but wow they really did that". Good stuff. And I learned that in Japan if a spouse cheats or otherwise does something that's cause for divorce, they have to pay a compensation fee! Wild.

If you made it to the end of this rant, I appreciate you ;

[prudnces]

( 𝚟𝚒𝚌𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚊 𝚙𝚎𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚒 & 𝚌𝚒𝚜 𝚏𝚎𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚎 ) + you know 𝘗𝘙𝘜𝘋𝘌𝘕𝘊𝘌 𝘝𝘈𝘕 𝘏𝘖𝘓𝘛, the 25 year-old 𝘗𝘙𝘐𝘝𝘈𝘛𝘌 𝘐𝘕𝘝𝘌𝘚𝘛𝘐𝘎𝘈𝘛𝘖𝘙 that has lived in eldstead 𝘚𝘌𝘝𝘌𝘕 𝘠𝘌𝘈𝘙𝘚? i heard she has a tendency to be 𝘙𝘌𝘚𝘖𝘜𝘙𝘊𝘌𝘍𝘜𝘓, 𝘐𝘕𝘛𝘌𝘕𝘛𝘐𝘖𝘕𝘈𝘓, 𝘋𝘐𝘚𝘖𝘉𝘌𝘋𝘐𝘌𝘕𝘛 & 𝘚𝘜𝘙𝘓𝘠. the 𝘛𝘈𝘜𝘙𝘜𝘚 has equipped 𝘒𝘌𝘠 in time for the full moon.

HI i’m hero, 22, i lov horror movies and no longer have a shudder subscription :pensive: normally i do these on google docs but i’m lazy and prue is Incredibly New so i’m still trying to get the hang of things

name: prudence van holt  nicknames: prue, p age: 25 gender: cis woman pronouns: she/her d.o.b.: april 23, 1995 zodiac: taurus sexual orientation: homosexual homoromantic mbti: isfj - the protector character inspo: wynonna earp, veronica mars, prudence halliwell (mayb i took the name don’t look @ me) aesthetics: a steaming mug of black coffee, deep green woollen sweaters, golden rings and necklaces adorning her, a camera hanging around her neck, the mist of the morning, a deer grazing in the forest, the heavy thud of boots against old hardwood, a grandfather clock striking the witching hour

HISTORY

triggers: child abandonment, car accident (drunk driving), death

prudence van holt’s birth is a mystery-- all she knows is she was dropped off at the fire station in a town outside of seattle, the only identification a baby blanket with her name on it. 

she ends up being adopted by a couple, the van holts, who always wanted multiple kids but could not after their first, a boy. 

growing up, she’s always been a little shit. she doesn’t mean to be. she just has an insatiable curiosity, sticking her nose in other’s businesses, finding lost things, she had a strange knack for it. it got her into a lot of trouble, children had no business sticking their nose into adults’ things. 

her brother never really liked her-- he always resented the fact their parents brought her home, took her in, when they already had a perfectly fine child needing attention. petty things, except it’s sparked a life long sibling rivalry that runs deep. 

it’s a pretty uneventful childhood, her parents are good people, they provide for her, and support her, despite her troublesome antics. 

she’s always been a lonely child, she’s never had the easiest time making friends, so she’s spent a lot of her time exploring the woods near her home. 

she’s thirteen when she discovers her mother, whom she always has written off as simply eccentric, is more than that-- she’s a witch. and a good one, too. her book club meetings she’s often privvy to walking through is more than that, it’s her coven. 

so of course, prue wants in-- how can she not? it’s a whole new world, working under her mother’s wing, driving a wedge further between herself and her brother. she tells her to be careful, to watch her back, that there’s bad people who want to do bad things with the power they wield. it instills a deeper ideal of trust no one in prudence-- one that sticks with her to this day.

and she’s dedicated to the craft! she takes time to learn the different meanings and uses of herbs, flowers, etc., makes potions, cast spells-- perhaps sometimes for personal gain, but she’s dedicated herself to using them to help others. 

she sort of becomes a private investigator in high school, not on purpose, but a friend tasks her to find out if her boyfriend is cheating on her, so tails him, catches him in the act-- gives him a little hex for good measure. 

it becomes a thing, people need something found? they go to her. think their partner is fooling around? they go to her. and she delivers, all with a little touch of magic. eventually, she wants to go deeper, take on more serious cases, but alas she’s only a teenager. 

sike! that doesn’t stop her. and as much as she hates cops, she has an in at the department through her father, so soon she’s not so legally trying to solve murders. 

and that’s all fine and dandy, until just a month shy of her eighteenth birthday, and two months before she graduates from high school, her parents get into a car accident coming home from a meeting one night. a drunk driver swerves into their side of the road, hitting them head on. neither survive. 

it’s that that has her change her mind about college, why go to college when she already knows what she wants to do? life is fleeting, and she’s hurting, so she graduates, and moves to eldstead, a town an hour and half away from her own home. it’s not a big change, but enough for her to have a fresh start. 

she knows something is different about the storm when it hits, that it brought about something... destructive. and she’s inclined to get to the bottom of all of it. it’s in her nature-- she has to snoop. 

she runs her own private investigation that used to serve eldstead and the surrounding area, but now it’s simply eldstead. she makes her own hours, and works alone, because she prefers it that way. 

PERSONALITY 

she’s really closed off-- she prefers to be alone, because of the shit she’s seen, and the people in her life, she just expects to be let down. 

when you first meet her, there’s a chance she’s just going to brush you off. she’s not exactly the friendliest person out there? 

will she be an asshole for the sake of being an asshole? no. absolutely not. but she is unflinchingly honest about her observations, and that doesn’t always go over well. 

very much a ‘do the thing first, ask for forgiveness later type of person’-- doesn’t have a lot of regard for rules that aren’t her own. (*dw voice* that sign can’t stop me bc i can’t read!)

if u do manage to be friends with her, she’s got ur mf back she’s unflinchingly loyal and if you break her trust, you’re pretty much dead to her lol 

TIDBITS 

she has a black cat (wow a witch with a black cat...... groundbreaking) named inkblot (creative, rly), nicknamed inky like the pacman ghost

surprisingly high alcohol tolerance, loves 2 go for a beer or a whiskey at the end of a long day 

lives in cableknit sweaters-- this is the pnw i mean a bitch be cold 

doesn’t really date? she came out when she was 16, and there’s been a couple relationships, but they never really pan out-- it’s always because of her. she doesn’t know how to open up 

swears a lot 

has a pretty good understanding of basic hand to hand combat just in case perps get a little rowdy, took boxing classes for abt 4 years? 

probably an elderly person when it comes to social media, kinda likes to keep a low profile but she also posts a shit ton of pictures of her cat 

INCREDIBLY good at finding lost things-- keys, phones, dogs, u name it she just knows-- and she doesnt know if its the intuition that comes from being a witch or just herself 

prob should join a coven, but shes a lone wolf awoo

prob barks at men idk 

lives off of black coffee, doesn’t rly sleep 

has multiple ear piercings and a couple tattoos but she usually keeps them hidden 

WANTED CONNECTIONS

informant - she gets information from them for her cases, they got a p good grasp 

someone she’s solved a case for - p self explanatory, now they’re friendly enough, or perhaps she couldn’t stand them and did it for the money 

someone who wants to be her friend but she’s weary - tbh shes weary of everybody 

coven adjacent - another witch, maybe theyre trying to get her to band together with them 

drinking buddy - they meet at the bar and shoot the shit 

opposites attract - friend who is nothing like them! but still hangs around! 

someone she feels like she has 2 protect - for whatever reason, even tho they can prob take care of themselves, prue is super fkn protective of them 

a genuine friend - yeah she just needs one idk she’s doing her best 

ex (f/nb) - someone she dated for a little bit but they broke up because of prue’s inability to open tf up 

fwb (f/nb) - ? maybe we all got needs, and she’s not looking for a relationship

attraction (f/nb) - there’s tension and neither know why! 

rival - to paraphrase a tumblr post what is a rival if not a crush you’re unhappy abt 

pure of heart, dumb of ass and lesbian - i just love this trope 

sibling like - someone who she genuinely sees as a younger/older sibling... goes to them for shit... protects them

frenemies - theyre not rly friends but they dont entirely hate each other either? 

tbh anything 

[torimetaxas]

icariahq task: 40 questions

Describe your character in a few words.  Flexible, chill, affable, resigned, fun-loving 

What do you know about your character that they don’t know yet? Lilith Thompson has siblings with their own demigod children, and she’s met some of those children. Legitimately, she has no idea that Millie and Mike are her first cousins and that there are more cousins lurking out there. Oh, and that she’s not as stupid as she thinks she is. She’s not like a secret genius or anything, but she always thought that she was an idiot.

What are your character’s major flaws? She’s passive and can be a little careless. Her time-blindness is unmatched. Her house is a mess.

What would your character give their life for? Probably some stupid mistake to protect someone she considers family.

What is your character’s greatest asset? Adaptability. She’s great in a crisis. Need to suddenly bury a body? Call Tori.

What would completely break your character? Losing someone she loves, coming to terms with her feelings about her birth mother and how upset she is that she was adopted out and apparently never mentioned again.

How does the image your character tries to project differ from the image they actually project? There’s a lot more going on her head than she usually gives off.

What is your character afraid of? Having to confront her feelings of abandonment. Meeting Lilith. Dying alone. Falling into a volcano.

Where would your character fall on a politeness/rudeness scale? Uhhh, she’s a nice enough person, but she swears a lot and can be a little forward. Closer to rude?

If your character could choose a different identity, who would they pick? She hasn’t watched the new series or anything, but Carmen Sandiego is the shit.

In what or whom is your character’s greatest faith in? A good time.

What was the best thing in your character’s life? Probably ferrets

What was the worst thing in your character’s life? Finding out Mira exists and trying to figure out what the fuck Lilith was thinking.

What is a favorite flavor or smell of your character? Tori has a total sweet tooth and a fondness for super sugary things like pixy stix. She likes actual good food, but sugar is comforting.

What seemingly insignificant memories stuck with your character?  Trying to start a stamp collection and getting five stamps in before getting frustrated about duplicates.

What is your character’s secret wish? To have some more predictability in life. Just the right amount of predictability. Seems imposssible.

What is your character’s greatest achievement?  Shit. Maybe when she was in high school and her field hockey team got a big win?

What is your character’s deepest regret? Uhhh she doesn’t really do regrets very often. Probably agreeing to go on a date with Eli when she only saw him as a brother.

What is your character’s deepest disappointment? Not being able to help Phoebe out more while growing up

What is your character reluctant to tell people? Definitely who her birth family is. She hasn’t told anybody about them, and it’s kind of eating her alive. Also, she’s very good at keeping secrets.

What is your character hiding from themselves?  While she’s very chill, Tori is angrier than she thinks she is. She also isn’t really angry at Mira- there just isn’t anyone more convenient to represent her problems.

What makes this character angry? What calms them? Mira and Eli existing make her upset. She’s calmed down by her ferret and her friends.

List situations in which your character would not have control over themselves.  Having to have a real conversation with Mira. Being faced with familial truth. I’m serious when I say that Tori was happy to skate through life before the Thompsons came to town.

How strong is your character’s emotions? Controllable? Uncontrollable? She has a lot of control over expressing anger and sadness, but isn’t great about hiding her joy and gossip.

What wakes your character up in the middle of the night? Anything. She’s a light sleeper.

Describe a recurring dream and/or nightmare. She’s in line and can’t figure out why other than knowing it’s important. People keep cutting in front of her, and when she tries to cut too, they throw a fit.

Describe your character’s family. Her mother, Irene Metaxas, passed away four years ago. She has several half-siblings via Hermes, but is probs closest to Phoebe because they both grew up in Icaria. Her birth family are the Thompsons

Name your character’s favourite person and why. Probably Phoebe. She thinks her sister is super entertaining and also a total badass.

How many friends does your character have? A good bit; she was pretty popular growing up

How many friends does your character want? More would be chill.

How would a friend or close relative describe your character? Fun, welcoming, all over the place

Who depends on your character? Why? I mean... When she is employed, she is depended on to do a good job. Tori is your go-to gal in a crisis... not daily life.

Who does your character most want to please? Why? At this point, probably Noah and Ezra because she doesn’t want to get fired again.

How does your character feel about sex? She really likes sex, but is disappointed that she has some trouble finding people willing to do so with her. 

How does your character feel about romantic relationships? Nothing’s stuck, so she imagines that it never really will.

If your character had to live in utter seclusion, what six items would they bring? A really big book she’s never read, good sleeping bag, an axe, some sort of book on survival, a lot of sunblock, tent

What is your character’s most noticeable trait and most noticeable physical feature? She’s got strong chill energy and a persistent smirk

How does your character feel about work? Cursed endeavor

Write one headcanon. Tori is big on soaking gummy bears in alcohol and almost always has some lurking. If you’re good friends with her, you should know that the gummy bears are always boozy and she wants you to have them.

Write one additional thing about your character. Tori could use some more hook-ups and fwbs. She is definitely my character who is best in bed (yes, I can rank them without wanting to write anything nsfw out. idk shoot me a message if you can’t guess the order), so help a girl out.

[cheyenneosis]

ok so after looking through some things my anxiety and paranoia has lessened much more, but im gonna mention some more things...personally this was a bit distressing to read about so only read more if you're curious abt my input

so i already talked abt this weird mess that popped up on here a few days ago when things looked very uncertain about a particular streamer

initially this looked like this was something that was meant to call out the guy as several users made this out to seem potentially illegal and toxic and the op who revealed to having a fling with vin also seemed to be somewhat against him based on their replies to other ppl so for several days i felt very anxious and was preparing to stop supporting vinny altogether

with op being legal and confirming that it was consensual i don't think there's anything to do, i find the age gap a bit strange to say the least but had they been just a year younger then I'd prob be more put off as grown adults should still stray away from basically fresh-out-of-hs ppl but i understand if others don't wish to watch vinny anymore bc of this however its just that it doesn't appear to be a case of abuse or grooming or toxicity so I'm not super bothered by this personally...people, esp those on this dumb site tend to celebrate and glorify the fact that teenagers who've just turned 18 yesterday will have already began promoting their onlyfans or some other form of sex work whether it be getting into p orn or escorting that likely attract the attention of 40+ y/os which is more disturbing to me so im just not super put off by someone who's gonna be 20 anyways hooking up with someone in their 30s

while i'm relieved that this did not turn out to be super fucked up ive seen a person or two get extremely defensive to the point of coming after op and emailing vinny about this...perhaps the way ppl have been talking about this drama could have caused these guys to think that this was a genuine slander situation but then again looking back no one ever actually accused vinny of doing something illegal/fucked aside from the age gap so this itself is bit of a red flag as if this was actually the case then those guys would have potentially been blindly defending vin just for the sake of protecting their beloved idol so...you know who you are...

on the other hand i got mixed messages throughout this whole thing which is probably what had me feel so migrained and on edge the past few days as i wasn't sure if this was some joke or an actual call out of some sort and earlier on i lowkey thought that it may have been something straight up untruthful tbh but things do connect so perhaps this isn't a lie of any sort...but with that being said i don't think any of those details should've been our business? i don't think that vinny would want that sort of thing being spread around so i thought this wasn't a good idea esp since it was kinda treated like this was supposed to be calling vinny out so idk its possible that before covid vinny was likely someone who occasionally hooked up with women as some adults do just for pleasure or whatever as long as its healthy then why should other people get involved in that info

i know someone's prob gonna message me or make fun of me for posting this long thing about this drama but vinesauce is just something i grew so attached to over the course of several months so if some nasty shit were to come to light my heart would break and I'd feel so unsure abt the future of the entire team but you know im prepared to put a dying dog down when things get too painful for it and ofc the others streamers are still just as good i just needed to get all that off my chest completely this time. seeing as this doesn't appear to be a very bad widespread situation i don't think vinny would need to address this but if he does then it probably wouldn't be such a bad idea

idk why this stuff had to get so weird in multiple areas i just want to go off but this will do hopefully. sorry if this post sounds off or poorly worded i only wanted to give my thoughts about this thing that plagued me for nearly a week everyone has just kinda done some things poorly in my opinion ill probably delete this sometime anyways time for sleep

[neonwizardheehee]

personal rant & brain dump bc I’m listening to bigbang and feel emo:

so i have a few topics that are circling my mind thus this will get messy (as usual hahaha)

- music as I said I’m listening to bb and the way I wanna cry??? mainly bc i miss my sis talking about them and being all happy and proud.. and just her in general v.v I feel like i overdid her with kpop and that doesn’t feel good. i was supposed to be the baby but i got too invested and now i am so damn invested i scare her :((( it makes me so sad :( but idk how to stop.(current mood & playing: let’s not fall in love) 

 - romance the new girls i met here are so different from the friends i have bc they are extroverts. i never had extroverts as friends before so i feel blessed now. we only met recently but they already were so open to me about things no one ever told me. like 3/4 girls i met talked to me about their first time and BOI i was so glad that we casually talked about it bc my other friends wouldn’t do that in a million years bc they are too shy. it really felt good. also no one judged me which was very reassuring. albeit me feeling a bit dumb bc i couldn’t really add to the convo but apparently I get better at listening ig? also that made me think that sex and dating shouldn’t be such an “important” topic as it is with my friends before. one friend sees it as an achievement to have a s/o but doesn’t talk about it or either brags (kskssk giiirl that’s so funny yet annoying XD yes u can be proud of your boi and brag bc i’m here for that bc i’m just so happy for you but ... not at random moments XDD). this made me realize how ppl refer to their s/o when talking to others. bc my friends who are very chill with their relationship always say their name while said friend (and ofc some others where having a relationship is important) always say “my bf/gf” or “ex” when that specific info is not relevant to the story they are telling XD

anyways it also made me realize how BAD i am with talking about my own feelings and wishes. since talking about my worries feels like complaining and i am good at that - but it feels random and uninteresting for anyone to hear i think to myself (it prob isnt). i feel so smol when asked about that topic and all i wanna answer is “???”. even if there is no pressure. idk why I’m like this and it makes me feel sorry for the people around me :( I’m so confused and idk what the question is. i can do better with writing but idk why but i wanna find out one day hahah. maybe i should just ask my new friends for advice since they are not judging me and i trust them and want to learn to be better with that. altho there’s this thought that I’m uncapable of love which frightens me a lot. I know i’m okay without it and i don’t mind but i feel so sorry for the people who like me? it also might be natural and I’m just stressing myself over nothing so idk what to ask and do -since you can’t force love right? i mean i don’t really believe in love at first sight i guess but rather spending time with that person and liking them a lot. so id why I’m pressuring myself so much with this :( maybe i am just too scared? or maybe i am anticipating too much? it all could be possible bc for everyone love is different and every relationship is different. so it’s mostly me feeling sorry for not giving back as much as i should and could :( - that’s also the reason why I’m so pro polyamorus relationships bc I know I’m not enough and idk how and if i want to fix that bc idk the rules bc there are none hahhaha - but also that makes me feel good bc i know i’m not responsible for someone’s happiness. i am too egoistical and these thoughts work as a self-protecting mechanism I KNOW that’s why i do this. so i’m not stressing myself even more. i just feel so unfairly precious when someone genuinely praises me when we’re just two ppl and no one else :( might be bc i don’t understand that feeling yet. i def want to know that but also i’m scared that it’d take me down a road where i loose myself (for some foolish reason idk why). so in the end ig I keep trying and get used to that (i already made loads of progress this year so ig i shouldn’t feel like I’m being too slow)

- studying okay so next topic is also just me feeling like i do too few. this week went quite okay and i managed to study on out study server everyday (ofc i had my bad days but i still at least smth). well yesterday i hastily did some vocab and then teh whole day i spend with friends & kpop... like LITERALLY until the night. a friend of mine was proud of me for taking a break (me too yesterday) but today i don’t feel good about that :( i missed so much. i’m scared it’ll kick me out of my study routine (since it was so hard to get my ass down to study itself!). i really want to be the person who’s studying every day and feel good about that. so since i have another thing planned today i don’t think i’ll get much done today as well :(((( i just wanna be a wise guy who knows a lot T.T i already made progress i know but... i want more.. i really wanna do well here and not be stuck behind like i was for the past 6 years :( i wanna have ambition again and not just pass... i kind of hope i can manage to study at nights on days like this but also i need my sleep so i stil have to find a solution for that. bc even tho i regret not studying as much i don’t regret hanging out with people. that’s smth i missed out in my first semester and so important in times like this were I’m stuck on my own. 

- religion so i have one christian friend here and yesterday we talked about church services and stuff like that and it was cool learning how it’s with her bc she goes to a very modern church (instead of me going to a traditional one 4 times a year). Suddenly i got sad tho and felt like crying :( even tho she was just stating her opinion i felt attacked and wanted to cry. after some thinking i think it’s just the way we are used to talking about religion bc we both grew up in an area where religion is looked down onto. for me .. i turned to myself and made up my own thoughts and beliefs bc i am too scared to talk and ask someone about it bc of all the accusations around me. religion was not smth to be discussed and only smth for yourself and maybe your family for me. the girl had to fight her way through all the “churches are old and fucked up and scary” things and since she goes to a modern one has good reasoning against them - that’s perfectly understandable and I’m so proud of her for speaking up like that. but like... it hit me on thw wrong side bc i am used to these old traditions and kind of like them even :( so it felt like she was insulting me. even tho she wasn’t.  i just dont know how to talk about religion and how to practice reading the bible or praying and hearing her talk about how she does all these things.. makes me feel invalid :( it’s like the only thing that i have is that i was raised a christian. but y’know for me it was okay since i learned in school not to practice or show my religion.. so idk how to do it... and i feel baby and sad if i have to ask her for some reason. i tried to look up this on the internet but ofc everyone is even more crazily involved there and it scares me SO much. so i unfollowed everyone hahah. i also have this one podcast but i still feel bad bc i’m not able to really read the bible on my own ig :( these days I’m just blaming it on the translation that i have but deep down i know it’s me who’s not able to ask questions at the text. maybe i should try to talk to someone... my sis who’s also in the same situation as me... or said girl to take me along and feel like a complete newbie and a little bit like an outcast bc religion for me is so different than to her.

- christmas i really enjoy the christmas spirit but i also already wanna cry if i think about gifts. i hate that i have so many people i love and will prob get smth from them so i have to make smth in return. i am overwhelmed and scared already. i didn’t even make a list yet T.T feels like i should block time to figure out gifts in my schedule bc I’m just putting it off more and more :( and also i already feel sorry for everyone bc they will get shitty gifts bc I’m so bad at this :(

[laughing-with-god]

BTS as Yandere (Based on their Venus and Mars Signs)

(We don’t know BTS’s exact birthtime and location so the placements are just general predictions and not precise.  Astrology is something I think reveals a lot about a person but I am in no way saying that all the members are like this)

Seokjin-

Venus in Capricorn.

Takes a long time for it to develop yandere habits/mindset.  But once he gets there, there is no turning back.  

Probably fell for you bc he can see a future with you. He’s very strategic and attracted to accomplished individuals so your career, work ethic or lifestyle probably drew his attention.  You had to impress him in some way.

Fan of older partners.  it’s okay if you’re younger but you still have to be mature.  Childish behavior really pisses him off.  

Capricorn is about control, once he has you he wants to be in charge of the smallest things about you.  Your diet, what products you use, what shows you watch, the music you listen to and the friends you spend time with. 

Public image is very important to him, so he will not deal with any disobedience esp if you guys are out in public.  Wants the world to think you two are the perfect couple.   

Not that romantic, but very traditional.  Obsessed with planning for the future with you.  Looks at houses, talks about the schools nearby for your future kids.  While a venus in Pisces might write poetry for you and get you flowers, venus in Capricorn would ask to sign up for a joint bank account.  That’s romance to them.

Venus in Capricorn apparently like bigger butts, thighs and even duskier complexion.  Tall partners too.

Venus in Capricorn likes to take their time.  Even though he’s yandere, he still wants to progress slowly with you to savor the buildup and think about the story he will tell his kids about how he got with their mother.  No kisses on the first few dates, probably took months for you guys to fuck.  

Mars in Cancer

very protective of you.

He will have a family with you.  That’s not up for discussion.

Although his venus in cap makes him attracted to ambitious women, his mars in cancer makes it so that after being together for a while, he would ask you to be a stay at home sweetheart while he works and provides for you.

loves being depended on.  His cap and cancer both agree on this.  

Very lenient on punishment.  His cap will try to set harsh ground rules, but if you were to break them, just give him some teary eyes and he would fold completely.  he tends to settle on lectures instead of physical punishment. 

“Darling, it’s never to early to start shaping our future.  We need to figure out what private school to send our kids to and that would dictate where we live next.”

Yoongi-

Venus in Aries.

While other members would despise a partner who fights back all the time and gets mouthy, Yoongi would adore it.  

The sassier and more outspoken you are, the more Yoongi loves you.

One of the few members to not mind if you are independent, in fact it turns him on to know how capable you are on your own.  

He likes tension and fighting, bc it keeps the spark alive and he thinks you’re the sexiest when you are fiery and livid.  

Likes the chase.  Will def play your game.  If you give into him too easily, he’ll loose interest very fast,

Tends to like more tomboyish partners, laidback and straighforward.  Don’t be too sensitive or feminine, it will only anger him.

Likes for the relationship to move fast.  Will fuck you on the fist date if you let him.  He doesn’t understand the concept of waiting when you set his heart on fire like it’s nothing.  

Do. Not. Undermine. Him.  

If you say something, esp about his masculinity, he will flip shit and prob go out to kill some ppl just to prove that he is no bitch.  aries are sensitive to their assertiveness being tested.  Very competitive as well.  

Quick tempered at times, but not the type to hold a grudge.  

Any competitors for your affection will be dealt with.  utmost violence as well.  

Not the type to take you out for dinner and a movie every time you guys go out on dates, wants to have exciting dates with you.

Enjoys the company of younger partners, a youthful energy is needed to keep up with him.

Mars in Cancer.

protective as hell.

He will be violent, but never at you. The type to hurt people around you rather than you.  Just enough to get his point across.

“Thanks to your bitchy behavior, (friend) can expect a broken arm tomorrow.  Hope you’re happy.”  

possessive over you.  

Needs to be told you love him.  Just for reassurance.

A family would be nice, but he would be happy with just one kid or some pets.  

Your guys’ shared home is sacred to him.  People can’t just come over.

“Doll face, I’m bored.  Let’s fight.  We can have hot makeup sex afterwards.”

Namjoon-

Venus in Scorpio.

Shit.  

Run bitch.

High key, venus in Scorpio is one of the most yandere placements to exist.  

Obsession is his middle name.

The moment he met you, he knew he had to have you.  His mindset is almost scary.  

He could barely know you but he already is experiencing a need to consume your entire mind, soul and body like no other.  

The deepest desire which taints his mind until he cannot think of anything else.  

Convinced you two are soulmates.  

Attracted to partners that are sexy, mysterious, able to enchant him whilst barely trying.  Darker and more sensual clothes are preferred on his lovers.  For girls, something very womanly and grown.  For a guy, something manly and appealing to your form.  

Possessive.  An unquenchable thirst to dominate his lover.  He loves the idea of completely taking over someone so magnetizing.  

You have to be very intelligent, he needs stimulating conversation.  You can’t just be sexy without a brain.  

really likes your scent.  Not the perfume you wear or the shampoo you use, but your actual natural scent.  Might sniff your used clothes to get it.  Doesn’t mind if you haven’t showered in a couple days.  (weird but I read this somewhere and I can totally see it so hop off)

Doesn’t take things slow.  why should he when he knows that you two are going to end up together either way?  would fucking marry you after knowing you for two months.  

Not above mind games in order to get you to stay.

Very romantic, but some of the things he says raises red flags.

“I would kill for you, (Y/n).”

Mars in Cancer.

This only enhances some of his venus in scorpio.  

VERY protective.  VERY possessive.

Way more likely to end up with a younger partner, this would also aid his venus in scorpio’s need to dominate and consume his partner.  

Unlike the other mars in cancers, I think he would physically punish you at times.  (more sexually themed punishments though) never enough to actually seriously harm you.  A light spanking here and there that feeds his need to be the dominant one.  

very smart with getting rid of people in your life.  It happens over time and they would always be labelled missing.  

Wants to be the only person you need, will provide for you too.  Idk if he would want a fam bc venus in scorpio is very tunnel vision and kids may fuck with that.  

“We’re soulmates baby.  Don't kid yourself.  No one on this god green earth will understand you or care for you as much as I do.”

Hoseok-

Venus in Pisces.  

Attracted to softer and sweeter partners.  He wants to be slapped into a dreamy state when he sees you.

Very romantic.  Poems, songs, flowers, chocolates, five-star dining ect.  

eager to please you in any way.  Type to leave his house at 4 am and hit up your place to deliver ice cream just bc you ran out.

very emotional with you.  Your phone could die and you can’t answer his text, therefore 30 minutes later Hoseok would be sobbing and begging at your doorstep to not leave him.  

Very self-pitying.  Hard to explain but have you ever been mad at someone and instead of defending themselves, they just kinda say stuff like; “You’re right.  I’m the worst kind of person.  I should just die already.”  

He’s like that whenever you’re mad at him.  He likes to play the guilt card a lot.  

Enjoys smaller lovers, or petite people.  Likes feeling bigger than his partner.  (don't come for me guys, I literally just read this and it kinda made sense to me. Pisces are depicted as more elfish figures so he probably finds it attractive.)

Cuddling is so vital to him.  it’s as if he charges himself up or something because he can literally experience withdrawls.

Loves it if you’re really sweet and charitable. also if you are into arts or occult themes, Hoseok would be so intrigued and want to learn from you

Works himself into obsessive fantasies, Pisces love escapism and he tends to day dream about you 24/7.  

Least likely among the members to be violent to you or anyone else for that matter.

He would hurt himself before anyone else.  He likes acting very depressed or gloomy (in extreme cases, getting himself bruised and bloody) in order to get your affection and worry.  

Mars In Aquarius.

Still stands true that he wouldn’t hurt other people.  He’s very logical despite being yandere and he knows that you’re not sleeping with the waiter who lingered too long.  

Aquarius is very logical, so he could be very calculating with his emotional manipulating.  Like tell you his dad just got diagnosed with cancer and induldge in your cuddles and coddling, but little did you know his dad has had it for years.  

Punishment is very aloof.  You just loose privilages.  

Least likely to have an age preference out of the members.

Into some really kinky or odd/taboo things in the bedroom.  At the very least, he’s very willing to experiment.  

“Sugarplum~!  Aren’t you so sad for me right now?  Please, give me cuddles.  Those always make me feel better.”

Jimin-

Venus in Scorpio

Very desperate to know every little thing he can about you.  

You haunt his mind even if it was just a brief encounter that you had with him.  

also wants to consume your very mind, body and soul.  

Attracted to sexy over cute.  Curves, dark and sensual clothes, alluring mannerisms and husky voice.  He wants to be magnetized by you, unable to forget you even if he tried.

Obsessive, mind consuming, passionate love for you which depths kind of terrify you.  

loyal and dedicated.  Your enemies are his enemies now.  (This includes anyone who happened to give you a less than warm glance).  

Sex is very important to a venus in scorpio, he feels like it’s the only way to properly express his love through mind-numbing pleasure he can give to you.  

He moves fast once he’s with you.  he doesn’t want to go through the fluffy bullshit of waiting so long to kiss, fuck or move in together when he’s 100% convinced you are his soulmate.  

Jealous.  No one should be able to look at you the way he does.  He’ll loose it.  

Wants to control you.  it’s the end-game.  

Doesn’t mind if you are younger or older but he will be the one in charge.  

A partner who has the appearance of dominance but will be very submissive to him is what he craves.

Likes marking his territory.  Leaves bruises, hickies or makes you wear couple clothes, his clothes or a necklace or something to make him feel the thrill of ownership.  

will write his name on you if you let him.  Just a permanent markered ‘Park Jimin’ on your forearm or something.  

But he would be so happy if you did the same to him as well.

You belong to him just as much as he belongs to you.

Mars in Scorpio.

Protective, possessive.  you know the drill.  

Punishments with you are sexual.  

Power play with him in charge is also a big factor in your sex life.  

Can and will murder anyone he deems a threat.  

Even your family and friends have to keep their distance.  

“Jagi, my name is beginning to fade off your arm.  Let’s touch it up, yeah?”

Taehyung-

Venus in Aquarius.

Attracted to someone very different and unique. 

It can be your looks, your ethnicity, personality, career or interests but for whatever reason; you stood out.  

Big age gaps are seen here.  Doesn’t matter if you are younger or older but chances are, it’s by ALOT.

Doesn’t follow dating normalities.  Couldn't give less of a shit about dating or courting. if he wants you, he is going to get you.  

Turned on by taboo relationships and sex.  Like if it’s forbidden for you two to be together, it’ll only spur him on more.  

Teacher/student, boss/worker, affairs, age gaps.  Anything society might look at with an eyebrow raise.  

Very kinky in the sheets, wants to try everything at least once.  

Aquarius is very cold and aloof sometimes, so Tae wouldn’t get jealous.  He has mastered the mask of indifference.  If someone tries talking to you in effort to get with you, Tae would just laugh bc it’s almost funny how they thought they had a chance with you.  

You must be very interesting intellectually, he wants a partner he can learn from.  

His yandere habits come out when you try to block him out from your life, or try to lessen his control over you.  

He craves authority over you, this is only added to bc his mars is in Capricorn. 

Wants to make small changes about you, then eventually big ones.  

Like it’s really subtle too, he’ll say something like “Oh, I really like that style, you should wear it more.”  And then a month later, he’s in control of your wardrobe. 

His methods are very sly.  He doesn’t threaten you or make a big show of putting you into submission, he much rather just plant a seed in your mind and wait for nature to take it’s coarse.  

Loves surprising you and playing games.  Will stop talking to you for like a week and then theres a knock on your door and damn, he sent you Gucci.

Doesn’t want you to be able to figure him out.  Always thinking of the next unpredictable thing he could do to keep you one your toes.  

Mars in Capricorn.  

After the push and pull game is over and he has put you into a submissive state for him, he wants to begin a more traditional life.  House, kids, you became a stay at home lover.    

Just bc he becomes a family man doesn’t mean that the freaky sex has to stop.

Possessive of you and your future kids.  

The type to teach his future kids on yandere and how they should make sure ‘mommy never tries to leave daddy’.  

Punishments are physical, and very harsh.  He’s all about that discipline and will not be talked down when he thinks you broke one of his rules. 

“Why is it wrong for me to make choices for you?  I know what best after all.  Have I ever failed you?  Even when people told me to break up with you because our relationship wasn’t cookie-cutter.”

Jungkook

Venus in Libra. 

The opposite of Yoongi. He wants someone who is very feminie and ‘girly.’

Dresses, pastel colors, nice perfume, charming, docile manners and sweet sounding voice.  

Wants very bad to prove himself to you.  Virgos and Libras are people pleasers so the fact that his sun and venus are these two signs just tells me that he desperately will try to get you to like him.  

Will change his style, his hair, his voice whatever he has to do to get you to pay him attention.  

Very romantic.  Thinks you deserve the best so that will always reflect in the dates he takes you on or the gifts he gives you.  

Libra is ruled by venus so love is something that he simply cannot live without.  He fantasizes about marriage and furture plans with you.  

Will call you ‘wifey’ if you let him.  

He adores you.  

Worships the ground you walk on.  

Which is why his yandere tendencies will have to walk around your desires.  

Like you tell him to stop looking through your bedroom windows at night,  he can’t bring himself to do it anymore bc that would be going against you directly.  

BUT you didn’t say he couldn’t install cameras.

King of loopholes.  

Like a mechivous kid who loves his mom and doesn’t want to get scolded, but he still wants to sneak in some cookies from the jar.  

He isn’t the punisher of the relationship, YOU are.  

If he does something that angers you, just don’t talk to him for literally an hour or so and he’d go crazy.  

the fear of losing you is too great.  

Another one who really enjoys your scent.  It’s like crack to him.  

Prone to stealing a small thing froom you, like a scarf or a blanket that has your scent on it.  

If you were to be away from him for a while, he would just steal your perfume and spray it on his hoodie so he could feel like you were hugging him.  

Might even buy your perfume for himself.....

Mars in Scorpio.

Very protective of you and cannot handle the possibility of anyone being with you the way he is.  

He will get very brutal with anyone he considers a threat, no one is safe.  You can literally walk an old man across the street and Jungkook would still think the fucker was trying to cup a feel. 

very sexual, switches between being dominant and submissive.  It’s mainly focused on pleasing you bc of libra and virgo but mars is the planet of sex and with that in scorpio means he can be a dom.

Jungkook is (and I say this with all my heart) a switch with sub preference.

Wants to know you like no one else ever has.  You know how the members with scorpio venus are so intense? Jungkook has that side to him too.    

….it’s just hidden behind the sweeter venus libra.

“Princess, please stop ignoring me.  You’re my goddess, I can’t handle not being acknowledged by you.  Just tell me what to do to make it better.”