#idont think ill stop

[baldofawesome]

btb doodles

[slaying-absolute-penis]

,

[mechawolfie]

I think I have a tendency to get super deep into self-reflection not in an attempt to Heal like I tell myself but rather in an attempt to "fix" myself so I'm more presentable to others/feel worthy of existing alongside other ppl

[comvi]

boom!! whatnowwhatnow/// Ohyeah. silver and whisperer interaction: bassicly what happend was that whisperer saw silver again and got kinda mad at the stalking so he told lucky to just. not come with. lucky listened (even though lucky kinda only wanted to eat sliver cause they look goopy) When whisperer spotted it once more, he instantly threw a rock at it. The rock sinked into its ear, it did not react and kept looking at him. "HEY!" It did not react. "Your eyes deceive" "No, no they dont. Now stop talking to me you damn...entity" Whisperer ran over, the silver eyed slugcat winched back a little. when face to face whisperer said "Who are you and why do you keep stalking us?" It tilted its head at him. "Hello?" No response. Whisperer reached out a paw and pressed on its chest. it backed up and quickly swated whisperers hand "N-N-NOP-No...badidea...dont-dont interact..." "..what?" "YYYYOU-you-shouldbackup..." "Why? and are you gonna answer me" whisperer stammered, not feeling safe. "I-IDONTKNOWWHERE-Ihurtpeople...andicant...dontwantto hurt you.." "Errr...." whisperer started backing up a bit "D-DOntbe...scarred? PLEAsE!HELP!" "What do you mean help?! help with what?!" whisperer whimpered "s-sorry...Habit..." "what do you mean scarred? like.. scared?" it stopped moving, its unreal ears twitching a little "T-thank you...yesthatword..." "Ok, now why were you stalking us?" "T-t-tthepeople...sayidothat...idont mean to..." "Who are the people..?" "Rumors..." spikes slowly formed on its chest "its "U-unbound.." "Undone" "Unforseen..." "Unknown" I-i-i-idontlike...what they say..." Whisperer is now clearly uncomfy, but IT also seems like that.. "Do you. hurt people on purpose or.wait yeah what did..what did you mean by hurt people?" It did not respond, more spikes grew on its chest, it looks distressed "E-EVE?HE-Everyones scared, they have their reasons. I-I-I-ImNot goingto-AAA-answer that." whisperer stared "How do you keep doing that. how are you changing your voice what does that mean. what did you mean by that." No response. Whisperer began to walk away before a spikey tendril grabbed his leg "Dont..leave..." "Please dont kill me." "W-WHATAREYOUDOI-Why would i dothat?" "Cause your. one either a fucking villan or a *really* REALLY weird slugcat." "O-Oh...Myf-f-f-Form...Is it scary?" "No but i do not want to even know what that implies so i plea for you to stay how you are. Now what do you want?" "T-to help..." "You dont even know what i need help with dude." "I heard it to." "heard...what...whatever! uhm... id "love" to have you along but dont know if i can." "I-i-i-i-ican always follow..." "...Great...bye..." "O-OHMYG-Onemore thing..." "yes..?" "W-Want...Thing?" "What is it.." It reached in its chest. and pulled out a sludge covered pearl (whisperer has never seen a pearl btw) "Uhhhhh thanks bye!" He snatched it and ran off, regretting ever interacting. ^ Copy and pasted thing. (aka yap from the actual story.)

Other things that happened in the chapter are Chief meets with whisperer and lucky, figures out the lucky's kind live in [spoiler location] Whisperer injuries his leg from an encounter with [spoiler enemy] adding on to the bleeding. still fine though.

EAHH WONDERFUL AS ALWAYS!!!! Sorry for such a late answer, i was in a sour mood for a lot of the day and usually i wait to answer when im in a better headspace but whatever ill just answer now!! & i can officially say i LIKE SILVER!!! i really do!!! i especially like how i can officially use the word “goopy” for it, and a particular detail i like about them is how we will hear names of [unknown creatures/potential victims] in its speech,, (eg. the name Eve was in here, im pretty sure!). + from the way they talked about itself being dangerous/harming others, & that they can also hear voice, im currently thinking they may not be fully in control of their actions, all the time? I could be so far off but, current theory im working about!

also im not too sure how to feel about the implication of silver being able to, quote-on-quote, “reach into their chest”. I mean we just found out that they are liquid-like enough to be able to be described as goopy ofcourse (already knew their tail was ferrafluid, didnt know that might also apply for the rest of its body), but i wonder now, does it being able to reach into its chest mean: 1. it is fully made of some sort of liquid of sorts, ferrafluid like its tail, or something else? for their body im assuming it would be made up of a denser liquid, or 2. maybe they have an open/exposed chest cavity? perhaps as a result of injury, but it still wasnt fatal enough to kill them (if it is even able to die), and left them how they are now. this could ofcourse go along with the 1st theory, but whatever. !!!

honorary lucky mention. I COULDNT NOT TALK ABOUT THEM!!!. Whisperer is going through some serious shit and lucky is just watching from the sidelines thinking “that thing my dad’s talking to looks goopy..i wonder what they taste like” LOL

[girlwithfish]

like ive never really had someone ask me that much if somethings ok and like when im having sex w someone or doing sexual stuff w someone its fine if theyre not that verbal cuz ill stop if i want or need to but its still sweet to me i guess even tho idont really need him to be asking that much like im horny as fuck hahahha but it was kind of refreshing and endearing idk 🙄🙄🙄like he asked if it was ok to put his arm around me and checked in w me a lotttt when we were making out we ended up just kissing for like 30-40min maybe an hour who knows and then it got more sexual but he would check in w me so much i told him at one point like yeah u can go further if u want tooo lol

Ugh im prob thinking w my pussy rn cuz we didnt actually fuck i wanted to so bad 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭i need him😭😭😭but like idk before we made out we sat on his couch for like an hr or two talking abt tv shows and cartoons lol.. like idk he asked if i wanted to go to his place while we were at the venue after the show ended so im like ok hes tryna fuck cuz going to someones place means that basically. And then we just talked for a while and he was just really gentle and nice im afraid its a front idk. at one point he said he was really nervous 🥹and hed also say im so pretty while we were kissing like oksyyu and once when he complimented me and i was like nervous laughing and saying awww thank u and he said sorry if he made it awkward and im like no thats just really sweet 🧍‍♂️loll..🥹🥹idk im kinda obsessed w him rn. hes like kind of quiet spoken too and very chill and also really nice and like considerate......(bare min ik😭🐕) and he said im down to earth and said his first impression of me was that im sweet and shy lol and he also said he thought i was really cute before we met and already thought i was pretty but was like whoa when he saw me irl when i was walking up to him like okayyy and at one point i think he said he really liked me too if i couldnt tell and i was like :0 cuz i said i was nervous meeting him and he said he was too... idk he also said hes never done a hookup b4 from a date like what???? uve gotta b lying . Right. Idk. idk cuz i asked have u ever done this before. on a fjrst date and he said no its the fjrst tjme and he said he felt really comfortable w me and also i like when we kiss he touches my hair a lot didnt realize i like that. also after we were done w sexual stuff we just kissed for a while like it was kind of cyoot okayyy but ik its just the sex chemicals making us all intimate and cute . but after we talked for an hr maybe just abt a lot of stuff

[theclosetedskeleton]

FAVORITE AND LEAST FAVORITE NEEDFUL THINGS CHARACTERS??

JUST SAW THIS YAYAYAYZAJZHZ

time to ramble abt needful things 😈

IDONT HAVE A *FAVORITE* FAVORITE NEEDFUL THINGS CHARACTER AT THE MOMENT SO ILL LIST SOME !!!!

LONG ASS POST AHEAD

Leland gaunt:

first original favorite character in the book tbh!!!! probably bc he gets introduced so early but whatever 😼

hes such an interesting character, all throughout the book. FUCK having leland gaunt as an old man i WILL make him this sorta middle aged guy because i CAN GRAHH !!!! I'd get into a bit more abt him but i REALLY DONT wanna spoil the book 🐟

Alan Pangborn:

I think hes the type of the character that went from "okay cool character whatever" to " wait hes actually really cool" . ALSO last week i couldnt STOP DRAWING HIM. I DONT KNOE WHY

again FUCK the way he looks in the needful things movie i am never getting over that one image of him from the movie he looks like all of those blue eyes memes istg. I hc him with blue eyes but NOT the eyes that the movie gave him. when i say blue i mean the non creepy kind because BLUE didnt mean BLUE BLUE oh my god. wait. or maybe i hc him with brown eyes??? i dont know both would be a cool option

Norris Ridgewick:

NORRIS FANS WYA 🗣🗣 100% has to be in this list for sure !!! hes also close friends with alan so thats rlly cool 😼 him and alan are one of the best duos ever !! polly [another char] doesnt exist (NO SHAME ON POLLY SHES A COOL CHARACTER BUT I DONT THINK WE REALLY GOT TO SEE MUCH OF NORRIS AND ALAN AND WE MORESO GOT ALAN AND POLLY [ but then again polly and alan are supposed to be in a relationship so FINE STEPHEN KING.... smh /lh])

ALSO SIDE NOTE I THINK ALAN AND NORRIS APPEAR IN OTHER STEPHEN KING BOOKS LIKE THE DARK HALF OR WHATEVER IT WAS CALLED!!! GOTTA READ THOSE BOOKS THEY WERE IN I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE FUCKED UP FICTIONAL TOWN IN MAINE AND ALL ITS PEOPLE NOW!!!!!!!

Nettie cobb:

Shes pretty cool !!!! she kinda deserved better in the book i dont know WHY wilma had this grudge against her (I think it was explained somewhere,, maybe it wasnt? idk) but the rivalrys kinda interesting. Nettie calls Wilma the"Crazy polish woman" sometimes in the book and i found that funny. wait holy shit new pickup line just dropped "Hey girl.... Are you Wilma Jerzyck? Cause youre MY crazy polish woman" I THOUGHT THIS WAS FUJNT

Ace merril:

I AM SO MAD HE DIDNT APPEAR IN THE NEEDFUL THINGS MOVIE. LIKE OHTMYGSJDBS GRAHHHH 🤬🤬💔💔 whatever cause if he did appear they'd probably make him look like whats one of the best ways to put it. "Cool guy" but in the annoying way stereotype. Hes a character who shows in the middle of thr book yet i dont see many people talking abt him

AND FOR LEAST FAVORITE CHARACTERS??? UHH.... i dont think I have much really... or any idk either i have an "ehh 🧐🤨😕" mood abt them, an interesting "🧐😱😼" or a "FAV !!!! HRAJH 🗣🗣🗣" mood abt them and p much everyone goes under the interesting or fav category thingy minus like one or two people but they like barely appear

ANYWAYS I THINK TJYATS ALL. if i added others Id probably just add all of the fucking characters 😼😼 BUT THANK YOU FOR ASKING THIS I NEEDED TO TALK ABT NEEDFUL THINGS (NOT *NEEDED* BUT YK)

[sanfielle]

interesting how your "disability" goes away once you have an opinion you want to be spread. stop typing like a moron.

yroue so right im doing thsi typo shit jsut for fun andd its a balst hoenstly. idont think i will stop becasue it gets me attention adn care frommy friends and mutuasl. ill alwasy be recognizable ebcasue i fuck up my typign so cutely and the brrand is allt aht matters to me

[pawtistics]

i literally cant catch up on meals guess ill die. i mean i’ve felt like this before and it does stop but i literally. have not done any work to make it stop it just happens. so. im hanging out. i think thats part of what made my therapist not take me sooo seriously? like ‘what helped ?’ idont fucking rember <3 i literally. Also she was like. do you have snacks you can rely on thruout the day. (Yes but thats what ive BEEN DOING. i guess its Fine then)

[genderqueeradrien]

nik j am Pickinf Up on ur typing style hhelp

SSORRY IM SORRY. idont know where i got it i think it wasthat tubbo rp account. but its like CONTAGIOUS anf it gets WORSE OVER TIMEE iicant stop doubling up on letters its like a fucking disease ill make a home in your gut Cuz it's somewhere warm to sleep And what was the thought when you realized You'll never feel naive love again? Was it pain Or was it sickness? Were you proud of who you'd been? sorry. hadto go into a whole musical number there u know how it is

[indigoelegy]

everything i know about lunatic circus from being a silly white girl with less than a toddler's comprehension of japanese

hi its me let me just preface this by saying uh the ONLY THING i'm able to properly read are their names because they have furigana and i can read that. everything else is a sort of Guess based on looking at the pictures and trying to piece it together in my mind. also ive only had a brief look at both the volumes (not so much volume 2 i havent actually looked through all of that). basically dont take ANYTHING i say at all as fact. please. im going based on VIBES alone. THIS IS GUESSWORK. ok so speaking of vibes first of all i get a bad feeling somehow. i dont know if its bc im traumatised from OTHER THINGS (stares) set in a kind of circus........ circus-like setting........ freakshow perhaps....... IF YOU GET WHAT IM SAYING but i get a bad feeling. LIKE I MEAN probably i'm wrong, right? because furuya isnt usually. like that. especially not nowadays but JUST IN CASE i just have some kind of weird feeling about it being set In A Circus

im just going to bulletpoint my assumptions based on the pictures

kujaku is a major asshole and i get the impression he's money hungry? there's this one panel which could be money next to him so im assuming that's what that means. nothing going to go wrong with that one im sure

hes also a major asshole because the troupe members line up before him and he WHIPS RANPO IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY. he also smacks one of the clowns and strikes a woman member to the ground and whips her as well (kizumaru tries to protect her, i think?)

ryunosuke spends a BUNCH of time on top of the tent talking or singing? to the weird creepy moon thing

i think ranpo and ryunosuke are going to be the boys who kiss in this one

no basis for this except they seem to be rivals and they get pictured together all the time

i think ranpo resents ryunosuke for being their poster boy while he's presumably an underperformer (thats the only reason i can fathom kujaku whipping him like that in front of everybody)

ranpo performs one of the things that i ASSUME only ryunosuke was able to do before (trapeze blindfolded) and he lands it and is excited about it??? maybe he gloats

and ryunosuke has a whole. whole issue about this. he goes into his room and screams (it literally says あああああああああああああああ which is pretty universal. even i know what that means!)

he does this shirtless and nagi peers in his window obviously wondering whats wrong with him but when ryunosuke sees him he gets embarrassed bc he has no shirt

i get the impression that its going to be like. ranpo has a jealous hateboner for ryunosuke because hes well loved and talented but the pressure of being their poster boy is driving him up the wall and theyll bond over the feeling of not being good enough for kujaku's money hungry little fingies no matter what etc etc

i havent had a solid look through volume 2 yet but i think ryunosuke is like. seriously ill. theres a panel or two in there that looks like he could be HALLUCINATING? while on the trapeze (PLEASE DONT TAKE MY WORD FOR THAT. I DONT KNOW. IT MIGHT NOT BE THAT) but either way even if that's not the case i get the impression hes very very troubled

nagi is a sweet little baby guy and i love him so much

also kujaku is even sussier in volume 2 bc in the beginning hes getting cosy with what looks to be like. a little girl. he is 74 years old (it says this). i'll get a picture of this one bc i cant believe my balls about this one to be honest

the little girl (idont know if she is actually a child or whether she just looks like one) is my pfp : ) i like her but i think kujaku should stop it

hotaru is like the troupe father???

or hes like. the responsible older brother type. either way he seems very kind and cool hes like he and nagi are best friends

btw hotaru and kizumaru are in their 20s but everybody else is 15-17 (nagi is 15 (and he goes to school before coming to the circus!), ryunosuke, ranpo and yuumi are 17 (not 100% sure abt yuumi its been a while since i looked) and karen and ikkoku are both 16)

there are a lot of panels which just linger on like

Man Attributes. this is a very gay affair

ok i only just noticed this in my sleep deprived haze RIGHT NOW but it maybe lends a little more weight that ryunosuke and ranpo are the only two who have names that might be derived from japanese authors AS FAR AS I KNOW. as far as i know. i dont know a lot about japanese literature except the absolute pop culture toddler basics (as usual) but i only Just Noticed. i havent checked if its the same kanji or anything YET but i will get back here when i do

anyway thats it i'll update this if i think of anything else but AGAIN PLEASE. PLEASE. i am JUST SOLELY looking at the pictures the ONLY THING I KNOW FOR CERTAIN are their names. its ONLY their names. i just bought them because i was curious and also physical books make me foam at the mouth like a rabid little doggy. i dont know if theres any other Better information out there about this manga but i couldnt find ANYTHING so i was like hm! my job now even though i, again, have a 3 month old's understanding of japanese please do not take any of this seriously im just guessing.

love you bye

edit btw if you want to see any of this you can just like you can dm me or send me an ask or whatever : )

[laylaleela]

I wish i had a lovely family,and sweet mother who cares about her daughter not only her two sons and a brother who protect his littlesister.

My mother has that hatred towards me and idk why , im very obedient child and its part of my religion so i need to obey my parents and be good them no matter what, but i do also know that even the parents should be kind and good to their children and my mother keep preferring my two other brothers ovet me , defend them even if they wrong and be sexist and i cant say anything back why? Because they r my brother,ill need them one day and since im a girl they have the right to be rude to me, hit me , even they r wrong and i always forgive them no matter what they do thats she always says to me.

And let me tell you my older brother is my nightmare,

When i was in middle school, iwas nice , kind,extroverted, thoughtful girl i care about my family, about people in general, although i almost got raped when i was 8 years and so many times old men SA me when i was young but like it didnt affect me like that one year , 2018

When my older brother became my nightmare.

I remember one day my older brother and i had a fight then suddenly he started to hitting me, punching me so hard that i couldnt feel my arms nor my face and i kept screaming for help but my parents weren't at home so there was nobody to help me or to save me from him and when he stopped and i stood up i tried to hit him back with a lil table and in instant of time my conscience said to me " u cant hit him he's your brother" so i put the table down and kept crying until my parents came back and when i told them my father talked with my brother and my mom didnt say a word like she didnt care

And then after months

When i go to shower and finish i always notice that the door is slightly open and one time i remember i had the shampoo over my head and on my eyes too i heard the door's sound but i kept saying it was just in my head

Until that one day

I got out from the shower and start to put my clothes on and while i was putting my shirt i had my head up and look up and see my brother's phone above my door ( my door has thin glass)

I immediately adjusted my shirt and opened the door and i found my older brother with a chair in his hand so he really was in the chair and was filming when i was naked...

I felt like someone raped me , a member of the family raped me...

Iwas just a 14 years old

I was in my own house

His my brother

My own brother was filming while i was naked

And the worst in all of this , when i said everything to my mom , she saw how iwas in shock and i pain like i was literally traumatized by that, she told me dont worry im gonna talk to him... after he came to apologize many time and everytime i tell him to get the fuch away from me... after 15 days my mom came to me and told me go talk to you brother and forgive and when i said no she said "who tf do you think you are ? If god can forgive anybody, who tf r you to not forgive ur own brother? And i couldn't speak or reply to her cuz she was about to hit me in my face...

And so many things my older brother has done to me but the most traumatized thing is this

Like now i cant trust my family, like really i dont trust people, im scared of men, i cant stay in one room with a man , i hate physical touch, i became so cold with everybody, im very distant, idont talk with people that much even with my family now.

Its true that im cold with my family because of what happened but i still care about them, i listen to them, im very obedient child but im just cold and it hurts me cuz everytime my parents ask me why im so cold why im not sweet like before and i changed...

my mom who herself traumatized me asking me this and then she will that ill end up alone, ill day alone , nobody gonna loves with that heart its a shame to have a daughter like me and two brothes they r better than me and they r always sweet to her knowing they only bring her problems and they do shit in the house and the only one who study who help her with house, when they r sick, when they need something im always here even to my older brother and her knowing about every single thing...and everytime i bring up what happend i start shaking and crying she goes "ooh shut up u just exaggerating so just stop"

im really traumatized but my mom doesn't want to understand or wont , she doesn't cafe what i think or about what i fee or care, she only care about her two sons.

Iwish u go to a therapist but i cant in my country if someone goes to a therapist so hes a crazy, and

I wish i could say everything to my dad but icant because if i tell him my mom will kick me out from the house and i have no where to go, so i just stfu and keeping it all to myself , and accept everything and tbh idk if i can forget everything and forgive them.

[bombworkorange]

ive always fucking hated maladaptive daydreaming its genuinely so infuriating i cant focus in on my reality because the stuff inside my head is so vivid and true that i begin to question myself and if im really alive. i need to wake up! i need to wake up! but i am awake ! but what if im not? <- that sounds fucking stupid and im so embarrassed with myself all the time . idk what to do or how to stop this andi hate the violent ones because then i snap out of it and everything is normal in reality but im disturbed by something that didnt even fucking happen. ive had this issue since i was small and its only worsened and it wont get better i dont think so anyway because its consistently only worsening and i already have hallucinations on top of that so thats great!!!!!!!!!! i just wont ever be able to fully focus onto whats real i guess!!!!!!!!!!! i love being mentally ill guys its so fun (i need to kill myself i cant live like this i cant even call this living im not even real!!!!) i dont even feel like i can call myself mentally ill either because what if secretly everyone is like this and im just weak because im thenonly one who struggles with it . everything in my head is so intense and it makes me want to bawl because i think toohard and focus too hard and then im convinced that everyone is not real !!! i solved it!!! now get me out!!! get me out!! letme see the real thing! that sounds so insane ughhd ive hurt myself so many times just so i could be certain that the things around me were real or not . im just so ashamed and i try to keep everything in because otherwise people think im just fucking crazy and ive dealt with this so long that i feel it just doesn't matter anymore. im so overwhelmed and paranoid all the time and i feel so bad for the things i imagine so vividly and all i canndo is hope its not true and that it doesnt say anything about me . i hate people who want to escape their reality via intense daydreaming because itsnot going to get better that way its only going to worsen and worsen and you wont know the difference anymore and youre gonna get paranoid and you'll never be the same again!!!!!!!!! sorry if this incomprehensible idont fucking care im so tired of feeling unreal . its only worsened my paranoia im already afraid of awful things occuring but then my mind cycles through every single little thing that could happen and what i could do and it takes up so much time of my day hdkgskdksjfksjkfnakd its not always these intense serious scenarios it can be something extremely fucking boring or it cannbe about characters but that doesnt make it any fucking better haha i love characters but get out of my fucking head!!!!! the hours just go by and that entire time I'm sitting there doing absolutely nothing but being stuck in my own head . shame shame shame!!!!!!!!!!! i dont even have to be sitting or anything akin to resting , it happens no matter what i do . its stupid and it pisses me off and i hate daydreaming . bye

[meowticta]

im spiraling again

lets just say someone (me) forgot eveything thats beeen happening since i was 7 years old and currently remembered everything and it felt llike someone threw water at me, i coukdnt process anything and i disocciated hard, like really hard (this has not happened to me since Years) and i think i currently relapsed ?? like you know, a cptsd relapse?? like i cant stop thinkign. i cant i cant everything i do lately is cry and disocciate and think about all of the shit that happened to me all i do lately is listening to the songs that remind me of it, and trigger myself on purpose, and Im Tired, but i dont really wanna go back to the hospital, it traumatized me idont think ill be able to go back and be hospitalized, Again, in any hospital.

i cant even see a hospital wheelchair, or an ambulance without freaking out, i am tired really tired of this ijust want it to end i did not have any suicidal thoughts for months until now, and this came up w the whole COCSA thing, then hte hospital, then me realizing how fucking shitty was my childhood, and it feels like im dying lately and i dont wanna bother my friend bc shes happy !! and i dont wanna fuck that up , but i dont have anyone to tell this so im just venting on social media bc i really have nobody, dont wanna traumadump my new friend yk? but yeah life's never been great to me

[elevatortheory]

want to post something bur too tired to do alt text because ihave a migraine . so ill just wait until my head stops hurting . idont think theres any excuse nto to do alt text if you cant be fucked writing it then dont post it ...

[rawrmeansilyindinosawr]

july 3, 2023

i let him fall asleep on my hands even til they fall numb n i dont feel anything anymore im oh so sore., n i just feel so dumb cuz ive been here before where i’ve given everything ive got and became something im not but i don’t feel n idont feel n i dont feel anything anymore so i asked metal bladez to feel my wrists to feel pain cuz u showed me how easy it was to make me feel so much blame but its all ok cuz luv isnt vain n there isnt a moment we share that i feel bored cuz we fight so much i shake and panic and have to take those lil blue pills to stop the manic .,.,.cry breathe fight laugh laugh laugh so hard when we snort the pink cupcake muffin happiness n he dresses up in my bras n sunglasses.,.play pretend we act like teenagers n kids n fools n we R oh so REckless ,.,.,,.

i let let let him rest his head on my palms til i hear him snore, breathing soundly in and out like the pumps when we're wet and fuck so hard we're both sore.,.but the tv is on and our clothes r off and the green neon lights aglow and we smoke our blow. its our secret n we intend 2 keep it. i think its special n only reserved for him- lockets of myself only unlocked by him-my body my voice my loyalty my time my eyes my affections. so i let him consume me with his mouth, let him dig the knife deeper into my spine, we trade clouds of smoke even when it’s yellow and it all smells like grime. he says he has never felt like this alive. ,. like his life didn’t start,.n today was like a first day, a first birth. happy birthday,.,.`,.to all the birthdays you never celebrated before

did u mean it cuz i can’t sleep comfortably with ur head on my palms n they say time will heal it. will u forgive me for the one lie i said out of shame 4 my identity and believe thts all that it was and ever will b. will i forgive u for the harsh words., n the months of abuse

bc it just all feels like chasing,. u say u love me and i ask u where,. can u point to it,,,or is it just void,like storybooks we just read like children that were merely nonfiction,.correct my diction tell me to come correct u are the voice inside my head,.,.i love u i hate u i feel like u wished i was dead. put all the blame and shame on me u made it mine to carry for ur own vanity. rest ur head inside my palm lines ill let them grow old and numb for the rest of the nite if u promise to love me right in the next life

[ellsellmesoull]

seeing a lot of yt vids abt scammers and their tactics and most of the comments are just calling the people who get scammed idiots

But guys come on, if you call them idiots your just validating them more

They're gonna think ''everyone else thinks this is dumb because they're not on my level, i'll show them soon enough''

And idont think people really understand how easy it is to get manipulated

Ok storytime

When I was in 6th grade, our school had this festival thing that the principle promotes like once or twice a year.

And all the different classes set up stalls selling everything from food to books toys anything you name it

And you could bring money and enjoy a whole day

And I was very excited because this was my first time since I moved to that school

And in my class, there was this girl who I was friends?(more than acquaintances) who came up w an idea

Lets all pile in our money and she'll carry it so if some one is too poor to afford something we could all help them out.

Shes like if someone cant afford much they're gonna be sad when they see everyone else enjoying and we were all friends so we didn't want to make our friends sad

But then she says, if you don't have enough to enjoy then this will help you

And now we are in the picture. Each of us saw us as the person without enough money. And she did a good job convincing us.

30AED? I bought 150AED and im willing to buy stuff less cus when we share and spend money equally, ill get wayy less money than I bought with me.

So like 5or 6 of us group together and pile in the money.

Now I got suspicious. But we were having fun and I saw her as a friend so I naively trusted her. And I was alone.

I was the new girl. No one else to hangout with and if I do this, I got a group to hangout with alldayy.

But another girl stopped me, and I should've listened but I was too caught up ecstatic that I ignored her. She didn't call me an idiot but warned me but I was an idiot and didn't think much of it.

Until...we got seperated. The scammer girl kept ALL the money in her purse and when you wanna buy something you gotta ask her.

Halfway walking with her I realised this was a bad idea. Cus everytime we wanted to buy something, she would complain that it was too expensive. What if someone else wants something but cant buy cus you used too much money for yourself.

Eventually I managed to wrangle a used toy for my sis and found the girl who warned me.

I cried for a good while. And she was very comforting.

And then together we decided to confront the scammer. But by the time we found her, she was alone and used all our money. So she cannot refund me. And everyone else was also equally pissed off.

Because while everyone else got something cheap, scammer girl was the one who bought wayy more than her budget because she leached off of ours.

So you I WAS an idiot. And stupid for not seeing it coming.

But the thing is, if you call someone an idiot for falling into the scams and enjoy them suffering cus of it like they are no better than the people who scammed them, that's not helping.

You should be attacking the scammers not the victims. You could call them idiots after the scammer is x-x

Better to raise awareness, or in our case sic the class teacher on the scammer.(that's a metaphor for contacting authorities to take action).