#if I could remember the name of the bird that inspired me to go down this convoluted sex system it would be so awesome

[clannfearrunt]

Was thinking about the fucked up fish genders again and the voice of what I can only assume is the devil itself whispered “you are re-inventing the omegaverse”. Bitch I am NOT this isn’t fantasy wolf shit this is reallife bird shit I’m on. Go away Brain Devil. Where did you come from

[alientee]

This is a 3 shot series inspired by the amazing writer @gyoongim. They did amazing with my ask and I’m in love with Alastor x Jessica rabbit .🤣

Fun fact It’s said that Jessica rabbit is also asexual!

Charlie felt defeated, she tried her hardest but there wasn’t shit she could do against that damn Adam or the council. Sera took pity on her stopping her for a moment “Charlie…… while you were not successful maybe we can come to a compromise?”

Charlie looked back up with her with hope in her eyes while Vaggie continues to glare.

“How about this we send an angel down with you, they spend a day in your hotel and we get to learn about all your progress. Maybe that will help sway the masses and myself.

Charlie instantly nodded thanking them over and over again. “So where’s the angle joining us”

“Emily has gotten her….. ah there they are”

Emily bounced forward happily introducing you

“Charlie this is y/n she’s one of the angels that actually believe In your cause!”

Sera looked down at you giving you a stern look.

“You’ll stay there for 1 day and then come right back y/n. Stay safe and good luck”

You walk into the portal with Charlie and Vaggie leading to the hotel. The demon princess didn’t stop talking about how she was going to give you a tour, show you everything they have to offer, even take you to the few nice places in hell. She started to ask you questions. She seemed really sweet and excited to get to know you. “Can I just say you look absolutely gorgeous, you’re like wow!”

You giggled. “Thank you hun I used to turn a lot of heads when I was alive. Too bad I only had eyes for one man.”

Charlie looked even more excited “ Oh my gosh tell me everything!”

You went on and on about your past, how you were a singer and a model, how you were married to a radio host. How you got married and ended up retiring to be a housewife. You stopped your story when you ended up in front of a hotel looking around shocked.

“So this is hell huh? Now tell me more about the hotel”

Charle links her arm with yours pushing the doors of the hotel open. “This is the hazbin hotel! Were we have 2 residents ready to rehabilitate and reform there life into good! It may not look like much but I garuntee you everyone here is dedicated to making there life better!”

Vaggie scoffed “not everyone”

“Okay almost everyone hehe” Charlie rubbed her neck nervously.

You look around and see the interior with a scary looking bar there were a couple of demons one looks like a spider the other a snake, two cyclops and the last one was…. a bird cat?

“Everyone this is y/n! She’s gonna be staying with us for the day to prove to heaven that demons can change!”

They all introduce themselves and the spider named angel comes up to you, looking you up and down. “ Beautiful and Busty they should’ve never sent you down here toots! Now you can give me a run for my money”

You laugh it off giving him a wink “I’m a tough lady I can handle myself. It’s nice to meet y’all”

Charlie gives you a tour of the hotel and you meet up with group once more “So what do you think y/n!”

“I think y’all have something really nice going on here��

“Thank you-“

“Charlotttttteeee~ why is there an angel in our premises didn’t I tell you the couldn’t be trusted”

You turned around at the sound at the static like voice.

“Y/N… is that you?”

Alastor still keeps his signature smile but his eyes are wide with confusion. He walks up to you pulling you into his chest. Alastor kisses both your cheeks putting his forhead against yours. “It’s me mon amor”

“Alastor!? Honey you look so different and your smile is even bigger than I remember”

“Well you know you’re not fully dressed without a smile. Y/n darling what are you doing here? Someone sweet as you doesn’t belong down here”.

You hold him close snuggling into his chest “oh Al it’s alright I’m just here to see the hotel on behalf of the council. I missed you so much ! What are you doing here honey ? I was so confused when I never met you in heaven what on earth got you down here?”

Alastor looks away sheepishly “Well about that-“

“UM EXCUSE ME!”

You both turn around to see everyone looking at you both in shock. After a long silence Charlie speaks up.

“So you two know eachother huh”

You looking at everyone shyly “You remember how I said I was married to a radio host”

Alastor smirked pulling his arm around your waist. “This gorgeous gal has had my heart since I first laid eyes on her” He kisses your forhead

None of them could believe it! You were Alastor’s wife?!

Vaggie moves forward while everyone else is looking at you in shock. “Hold on, wait a minute let me get this straight. You! A gorgeous, kind hearted, helpful angel…… are married to that thing?!”

Alastor squints his eyes his static going off “what are you trying to say Vaggatha”

Angel interrupts her before she could speak

“ it means she’s waaaayyyyy out of your league smiles. I mean Vaggies right, she’s hot and your….anyway, how and the hell did a dame like you end up with old freak face anyway?”

Alastor rolls his eyes “ I won her affections with my charm and manners. Something you clearly don’t have my feminine fellow”

Angel looks at him uninterested “yea I ain’t buying that. Toots why you with this stuck up prude?”

You hold alastor arm cuddling up to his side “He makes me laugh, how could I turn him down when he always put a smile on my face” you giggle softly

Everyone was still shocked by your answer none of them could really see someone like you with someone like alastor but decided to accept it (everyone accept Angel and Vaggie) Angel smirks

“Ok so I was right it definitely wasn’t for his looks”

“Well beauty isss in the eye of the beholder, I guesss he jussst got lucky”

Alastor rolls his eyes “Are you miscreants quite done”

“Now we always know why Mr fancy talk creepy voice is always smiling. Thinking about his busty wife gets him through the day haha”

“Angel dust if you wish to redeem your soul and make it into heaven I suggest you watch your mouth before I end your life.”

“Oh Al leave him be he’s just joking, now tell me why your down here”

Alastor sighs giving you his arm. You grab it not questioning it as he walks you both to the door. He doesn’t even look back at the others .

“I’m talking my wife for a walk we’ll be back shortly”

As the two of you walk out everyone stays silent until Angel speaks up. “I don’t care what any of you’s say, he was definitely not hitting that right”

As you both leave Alastor stays silent. You don’t rush him to talk, you never did. You two never fought when you were alive you always talked it out and took it one step at a time.

“You should know that I didn’t tell you this because I didn’t want to hurt you or scare you. You were the only good thing I had left after my mother. So I hope you can forgive me for keeping it from you.”

“Go on hon I’m listening”

“The bayou serial killer, that was me doll….i died getting shot in the head with a rifle, being mistaken for a deer while I was burying a body. And I may of…. ate a few people, but they were never in your food!”

You looked at him in shock but you never let go of his arms. “Oh my gosh….. that’s what you were doing out there, they never told me, just said it was a hunting accident….. I should’ve known! You would always go one these nature trips at night when ya barley had friends plus I shoulda known someone like you doesn’t like outdoor activities like that! How ya wouldn’t let me in your tool shed because it was to much “dangerous” stuff in there. How you’d come home from the radio tower early hours in the morning. I thought you were stepping out on me for a time but you still showed me all the same amount of affection so I pushed that thought out the window”

Alastor laughed a laugh track playing in the back ground “Oh daring why would I ever step out on the most beautiful woman in the world. I’d be a fool to have eyes for anyone but you”

He squeezed your hips pulling you into a hug “Do you regret marrying me, please tell the truth?”

“Oh Al of course not, even if you are a killer you were so sweet and gentle with me I’ve never felt safer than when I was with you. Your a wonderful husband I’ll never regret you honey ”

Alastor pulled you close his smile getting wider. “How about I make it up to you darling let me take you out on the town, it’s been a while and you deserve to be spoiled doll.”

“I’d love that Alastor”

You both walked down the street in silence with you both linked arm and arm as always. Until Alastor spoke up again”

“And by the way sweetheart Tu portes l'enfer hors de cette robe, j'ai raté ces courbes”

You blushed “Still a charmer I see”

Part 2 comming soon~

[princesssmars]

holly jolly!

an abby anderson x reader based on my abby winter drabble !

wc : 15.718

contains : fluff, angst and smut . fxf relationship. fem!reader. switch! abby and reader. oral and penetrative sex. strap-on yippee. past abby x owen ewwww. owen hate bc i hate him and its funny. reader is a skier and abby does hockey! shitty dad for reader sorry girls. slight alcoholism sorry girls again. the reader is described as slightly tall i know yall been wanting taller readers. reader is kind of bitchy and abby loves it my fave dynamic (dynamic and pretty much the rest inspired by the little ruse go read it).

a/n : sorry i never got over my drabble guys. i dont know who exactly made hockey!abby but ive read em all so big creds to @angelkissiies @millersaurora @whatwouldsylwrite (and @eightstarr for calling abby princess) everyone else smoochies ily <3 made reader a skier because ive been obsessing over the olympics and i watched mollys game and thought it would be cool if i made a skier reader instead of a figure skater. ballerina next time if yall will indulge my delusions.

christmas has always been a bittersweet holiday.

you can remember the good parts from your childhood. picking out your first stocking with your mom. when your younger brother hid in the cupboard to try and catch santa. when your baby brother got cookie dough all over the kitchen, even on the ceiling. or when you were five years old and your dad gifted you your very first pairs of skis.

but it was hard to remember when the bad could get really bad. constant days spent out in the cold and snow, redoing your runs over and over until your legs burned and your back ached. your days that were supposed to be full of vacationing and fun instead filled with aches and falls and countless arguments once you realized you could start talking back.

some of the few friends you've had over the years tried to get you to focus on the good times and not the bad. that dwelling in the past wouldn't help you move forward. when you were younger you'd just call them assholes and move on, but recently it didn't seem worth the effort. that's probably why you started college with no close friends.

it was fine. you had your smarts, which helped you to get a full-ride scholarship when a skiing one fell through after a bad leg injury a few months back. because of that, your mom managed to convince your dad to get off of your ass for a while as you recovered. you had money thanks to your parents and you had your looks which would land you a hookup once in a blue moon.

you'd even made two acquaintances on campus, your roommate, tonya, who was pretty mellow and made sure not to bring the weed she smoked inside your dorm, and a girl named nora in one of your general ed classes whom you would partner up with often.

so yeah. it was fine. at least until the end of your freshman year.

you were running late for your ten am class, sleeping in because tonya had somehow managed to convince you to go to a small party with her last night and take body shots, and then when you were close to being drunk you saw one of your past hookups in the corner who you had dropped for getting way too attached way too quickly, so then you had to quickly find tonya and run back to your dorm-

youre in the middle of remembering ton's bird-like laugh when you nearly faceplanted into your front door when you ran full force into a hulking mass of a body.

the sound of them lightly cursing and asking if you were okay falls on deaf ears as you pick up your bag and hike it to your class, ignoring the stairs of the other students when you rush and plop into your seat.

luckily you manage to get yourself together afterwards, fixing yourself up at your dorm before heading to your next course with nora. as soon as you sit down she's teasing you about a video she saw of you getting wasted last night and you don't even have the energy to entertain her.

"well, instead of getting drunk off your ass again how about you join me tonight? one of my friends is on the hockey team and i got some nice ass tickets."

"c'mon, nora. hockey? seriously?"

"oh, im sorry ms. olympian, is hockey too good for you suddenly? just a bunch of women tossing a puck around too barbaric for you?"

"wait, you didnt say it was women's hockey."

"well, it is."

"..."

"..."

"what time does it start?"

at around five you're putting on a cute sweater and a puffer jacket before joining nora on the campus bus where she tries to quickly explain the rules of hockey to you in the span of five minutes. she asks how on earth you haven't been to one of the games or at least heard of the team's star breakout player. you have to carefully explain that you've had enough of sports to last a lifetime.

the indoor arena is packed, and you have to roughly squeeze and push multiple people out of the way to get by. nora starts laughing and tells you to leave the violence to the players and you brush her off. (for some reason she constantly loves to tease you.) when you both finally sit in your seats, you notice that they're behind the glass where the team players get out onto the ice and sit for breaks. nora suddenly bangs on the glass behind a player wearing an ANDERSON 20 jersey. the girl stands up and turns around and good god.

you weren't the shortest girl yourself, standing a couple inches over most girls you knew, but jesus she was easily almost six feet tall, and big, even if her jersey and gear probably made her look larger which really didn't help you focus. you liked the contrast of it with her face, bright, cute, and red from the cold as she talked to nora through the plexiglass. you were just about to admire the shape of her nose when her slightly unnerving blue eyes turned to you.

"hey, i recognize you!"

your brows pull in a deep scrunch.

"from this morning, you bumped into me and nearly knocked me on my ass."

"oh my god, i had a feeling that was you!" you hear the familiar noise of nora laughing at your pain. "jeez, how drunk did you get last night?"

"would you just- look, im sorry about earlier. i was hungover and rushing to class."

she smiles and shakes her head. "its chill, dont worry about it. nora, are you going to that party at derek's frat after? i swear he was begging me to come but i wasnt too sure."

"abby, everyone asks you to go to their parties and you never do! live a little." nora pauses before wrapping her arm around your shoulders.

you knew she was about to say something to piss you off.

"even little y/n here is gonna come and properly apologize to someone for once. isn't that right, hun?"

great.

"well, that wasn't my plan for tonight. at all." you say before picking up your giant hockey-themed plastic cup and taking a sip, hoping the chill of your slushie numbs out the rest of this conversation.

abby adjusts some of her straps and her helmet before resting her hand on the glass, noticing how the rest of her teammates are getting ready to go out on the ice. "well, i'd really like to see you there. is there any way i could convince you to come?"

"i don't know, is there?"

"how about... when i win, you come to the party with me."

you couldn't help but roll your eyes so hard they hurt. leave it to nora to be friends with the walking cliche of an arrogant sports player. you could've been spending this moment in your dorm watching a dumb hallmark movie about a businesswoman falling in love with a farmer while eating chips and drinking a self-indulgent capri sun.

"and if you lose?"

the announcer over the loudspeaker called for the game to start and the players started making their way onto the ice. abby winks at you before turning around and joining the rest of her team.

"trust me, i won't."

you scoffed and flopped back into your hard seat, sucking almost angrily at the bright red straw in your slushie to ignore nora's look.

"are all of your friends that annoying?"

"kind of. thought you'd enjoy it though. birds of a feather."

not bothering to entertain her, you focused on the game that was starting in front of you.

you could understand the basics of the game; one team had to get the puck into the other goal several times until they won. you had a brief understanding of some of the other rules, mostly because your father explained every winter olympic sport to you in great detail when you were twelve. it became so boring at one point that you fell asleep and banged your head on the coffee table, startling the both of you so much he decided to let you go to bed.

but as the game goes on you have to admit that anderson is frighteningly good at what she does. she moves gracefully and quickly on the ice, so well you think to yourself that if she ever tires of hockey she could seriously pursue ice skating, but when an opposing player gets too aggressive with her she returns it with force. she's like an avalanche on skates.

when the game ends you can't tell whether you're shocked or agitated. your team won in what nora called a 'total fucking landslide', the bright 6-1 lighting up the scoreboard like a smack in the face. it felt slightly awkward that everyone around you was yelling and celebrating while you were sitting statue still in your seat.

nora could probably sense your discomfort and gently pulled you up, telling you that the both of you could throw your things away before meeting up with some more friends of hers before heading to the party.

so awesome.

her friends were nice enough, a psychology student named leah and her boyfriend jordan who was some type of biology major. they seemed happy to meet you but happier to make googoo eyes at each other and go to the party, which meant you most likely wouldn't see them again once you got there unless you stumble upon the two in a hallway closet or bathroom. there was also mel, a nursing student who seemed slightly closed off but agreed with you when you mentioned this party would probably be loud and gross. a bunch of athletes celebrating a win is a recipe for disaster.

"finally, the campion herself arrives!" jordan cheers and raises his bag of chips up to abby who's walking up to your group, wearing a simple college sweatshirt and some black sweatpants. for something so basic she makes it look good, and if you didn't have any integrity and weren't pissed off about this party bet thing you'd tell her so. but you are pissed off and still have about half of your integrity, so you keep your mouth shut.

when she bumps into your shoulder with a 'told ya i'd win' you're about to reply with a snarky remark when a tall man with dark blonde hair and another with tanned skin and brown hair come up beside her and raise her up on their shoulders, chanting 'anderson, anderson!' on repeat. you look to nora who just rolls her eyes and tells you that she'll introduce you in the car.

you're all split into two cars, with you riding with the two strange men along with abby and nora. they tell you the guysin the front seats are owen and manny. also that they've all known each other since they were teens which definitely doesn't make you feel like an outsider. but manny keeps trying to joke around with you so you don't feel too awkward which you can appreciate. even if you don't really laugh.

when the car stops at a giant white frat house you arent surprised in the slightest. you were about to prepare yourself for another night of drinking and finding another hookup when abby throws her arm over your shoulder and decides that she likes you enough to spend most of the night by your side.

she walks with you to get drinks and then leaves to go celebrate with some other friends while you sit and nurse your drink for a while. it leaves you some time to think, asking yourself why you're acting like you're trapped here when you could just leave whenever you want, but you don't understand why you don't. maybe it's because you'll use any excuse to have a good reason to drown out your problems with alcohol. or because you're lonely but don't feel like admitting it.

after around half an hour she comes back and sits on one side of you while you talk to nora and joins in. she asks about your major, if you're from seattle, and how you met nora. after a while you stop rolling your shoulders when she asks a new question and settle into conversation with her. and after a few hours you learn more about her too, that her dad is a neurosurgeon and she's following in his footsteps with her pre-med major, but that as soon as she tried hockey she knew she wanted to do it forever. she tells you that she doesn't really like drinking, she knows most of the people on the other women's sports teams, that she used to date owen-

you choke on a sip of your vodka and nora pats your back with a chuckle. you were definitely off your game tonight. but besides that hiccup you have to admit talking to them is enjoyable. even their friend manny comes over and dares you to do shots with him and you were seriously about to do it before the girls talked you out of it.

over the next few weeks, you talk more and more to the anderson girl, to the point where you're staying up at night to talk to her over the phone and waking up to your roommate giggling in your face. once she was so tired after a game she started snoring and you would not let her forget it. just like she wouldn't let you forget the time you got wasted at a sorority party, got on top of the kitchen island, and danced to a city girls' song before she set you back on the floor.

you wouldn't ever admit it out loud, hell you had barely admitted it to yourself, but you had started to catch feelings for abby. there was nothing more mebarrasing and cliche to you than falling for your straight friend, and you really didnt want to be on eof those girls who did so. but in your defense, it was really hard not to. she was annoyingly pretty, lord knows how many times youe admired the freckles dusting her cheeks down to her shoulders. she was strong and smart and every other positive character trait your brain could conure up.

but the worst thing was just how nice she was to you.

in hindsight, the way everything fell into place was honestly the dumbest thing ever. you were at a county fair leah had heard about and asked you to come with her along with jordan and abby. obviously, the couple went in their own direction after a while, which left you and abby to wander around getting on the different rides and getting your reaction to abby eating her first-ever funnel cake. but then it was later, and the two of you had stopped at one of those rigged pop up games and you bet her twenty bucks that she wouldn't win, and if there was one thing you knew about abby it was that she took bets very seriously, so when she won and had to pick her prize you were a little confused when she picked your favorite animal and handed it to you.

when you asked her how she knew it was your favorite, all she could say was 'you said they were cool a few times and they're your profile picture on your private instagram, so i just put the pieces together.'

you went home and didnt talk to her for a week. or at least you tried to, because after a weekend of ignoring her calls and convincing tonya to bring you meals from the lunch hall the blonde girl banged her fist on your door and basically demanded you tell her what your problem was.

"i don't see what the big fucking deal is. i'm allowed a little bit of space from you, abigail."

she scoffed and you could see her tongue bunch in the corner of her mouth before her body pushed past yours until she was standing in the middle of your room.

"i'm not saying you can't have space and you know im not. i mean, one second we're having a good time together and then you just shut me out for no reason. if i did something wrong i need you to tell me. i can't read your damn mind, y/n."

sometimes it feels like you can, you think with a snort, feeling slightly embarrassed by the angry look on her face. you collect yourself and cross your arms over your chest. "i just don't feel like talking to you right now, so if you could please get out now-"

"nope. not gonna leave until you tell me what's wrong."

sometimes you could forget just how damn stubborn she was. it mostly popped up on the ice, and you had once overheard her coach say that if she wasn't such a great player she'd be benched most of the time.

"do you realize how annoying you're being right now?"

"don't care."

"i don't give a shit if you have muscles, i can still kick your ass."

"i'd really like to see you try, princess."

you groan and cover your face, but not before raising them in a choking gesture. you walk backward and sit on your bed, trying to take a breather before anderson follows you and resting on the ground in front of you, her large palms smoothing up and down your thighs.

"please, y/n, just...just tell me what i did and i'll fix it, i promise."

you've never been one to cry. or maybe you had been when you were a young child before your father taught you that 'crying doesn't achieve success, at least not the kind you want.' but you can see how much abby cares about you in her eyes and you know that despite you being unreasonable she'll put up with it anyway. your eyes start to sting and you rest your head in the crook of her neck.

she doesn't force you to say anything more than you want, rubbing the expanse of your back while another hand gently pats your head. after a long minute, you pull your head up and find that the space between your two faces is almost nonexistent, your eyes dart from her eyes to her lips, and before you can say anything else her hand is on the back of your neck and she's bringing your lips down to hers.

its soft and sweet and her lips are soft and feel like heaven against yours, and she doesn't give you a second to be confused about what's happening because she's making the kiss deeper and pulling your body closer to hers by putting her arms under yours and pressing you in by the back of your shoulders. you throw your arms over her shoulders and behind her neck and decide that you're going to enjoy this moment for as long as you can.

but eventually, you need to breathe, pulling your head back and letting out a shaky breath of air when abby just moves her ministrations to your neck, sucking and biting on the skin until it bruises.

"i..i thought you were straight." is all you can manage to voice, the feeling of her body pressed into yours and her teeth nipping at your neck making your mind hazy.

she laughs and kisses your neck a few times before looking you in the eyes. "well, i never actually said i was, you just assumed so."

"seriously? you dated owen? he's the dullest straight girl choice i've ever met. and we live in washington" you scoffed.

"yeah, well. that was a long time ago. i've moved on to bigger and better things."

she plants a big overdramatic kiss on your cheek, repeating so on the other side of your face until she can see your smile and hear you giggle. when you both calm down a little she backs up and wears a more serious look on her face.

"i care about you. more than i've cared about anyone before." she smiles, her thumb rubbing over the back of one of your hands. "except maybe my dad, obviously. and nora, she was kinda my best friend before you. but you get what im trying to say."

you laugh and nod at her. "i understand. i...like you too. a lot."

"geez, you're seriously emotionally stunted. but i'll take what i can't get, you'll warm up to me eventually." she slaps her hands on your thighs, ignoring the annoyed look on your face before scooching your body up until you're laying down on your bed, her body gently flopping down onto yours.

"abby! get the hell off, you're wearing your outside clothes!"

"cmon, just five more minutes."

and as much as you complained during those five minutes, you both knew you didnt mind that much.

after that things were really nice. at least for the most part. you were officially abby's girlfriend, which she had asked if you wanted to be the day after you two semi-confessed your feelings. she knew that this kind of commitment was new to you, and the last time it didn't go so well for her, so you both decided it'd be best to take it slow.

(slow meaning you did everything you two did before with the added bonus of making out whenever you wanted. you weren't complaining.)

but keeping things on the down low was a bit of a struggle. abby was a huge fan of pda, always found hugging one of her teammates after a successful game or cuddling with someone on movie nights. she would hug you when you were just friends, but now that you were comfortable with her touching you more in private it started to bleed into public life, her hand looking for yours when walking around or giving you a kiss on the cheek after you aced another test.

the next problem was your friends. you had told nora over a late night phone call while manny had found out when he had walked into the living room of his and abbys shared dorm and found the two of you with your shirts off and kissing on the couch, shouting in both spanish and english about how his eyes burned but he was happy for you both.

you both knew you could trust the two of them with your 'secret', but you didn't expect that end-of-the-year party owen and manny decided to invite you both to.

it was a mix of things really. you were going to just spend time with your friends and nothing more, but you were feeling really pent up. when you and abby decided to take things slow, that also meant sex. which at first was all right with you, hookups were a lot different than sharing yourself with someone you really cared about. but abby was just so effortlessly hot, and now since hockey season was over she had more time to spend with you and it was driving you up the damn wall. it got to the point that you found yourself nearly always on the brink of an orgasm when after a long day she'd press you into her bed and kiss you until you felt dizzy.

so when she decided to go to the party in a tight long-sleeved top and a normal pair of jeans, you definitely should not have been all over her as you were.

(to be fair. she was also on you like white on rice. you had decided to don a tube top with a mini skirt, figuring it couldn't hurt to dress up a little for a simple party. especially since it made your girlfriend look at you like she wanted to eat you alive.)

after mingling a bit and getting yourself a drink, you meet up with some of your friends and start to talk to leah about some drama in one of her classes when abby rejoins you, moving your body so your body is resting into hers. you aren't used to such a public display of affection, but this alcohol is blurring any desire you had to hide that she was yours and you were hers.

"god, you guys are so cute together it makes me sick." nora laughs into her red solo cup, shaking her head at your adorable but annoying affection.

leah's eyebrows scrunch up and she starts to pinch at your arm. "wait, am i missing something? you two are dating?"

at that point, some other people were listening in and looking in at the two of you, including none other than owen moore. now, you and moore were always cordial, but you wouldn't call him a good friend like you would the others. you always felt that whenever he saw or heard about you abby spending time together or heard about how close you two had gotten so quickly, he would smile silently while staring at you like he wanted to burn lasers through your brain.

and he was doing the exact same thing now, his grip on his bear so tight you feared the glass would break. somehow you were the only one who noticed.

"yes, we're together. finally managed to convince this one that jocks aren't just big dumb idiots a few weeks ago." abby's talking breaks you out of your thoughts, her arms snaking around your waist and pulling you to sit on her lap.

you cant help but roll your eyes. "i never once said that."

"well you were thinking it. i could tell."

some of the people who you didnt know and who were friends of friends said congrats, how cute they thought the two of you were, etc. it kind of weirds you out to have all these people paying attention to you just because of who you were with, but abby's quips to any weird remarks you didn't want to acknowledge made you feel better about anything.

but later on, when the two of you are unseriously dancing in the living room, owen comes over and asks abby to talk in private, leaving you to dance with some girls you recognized from the last party. but after three songs pass and abby still hasn't come back, you get a weird feeling in your chest and decide to go looking for the two. you head upstairs and down a few hallways before you hear two voices in a heated argument, and after numerous visits to her games, you can recognize abby's yelling anywhere.

before you can knock on the door to ask if something is wrong, it opens and you see a red-faced owen, not even saying anything before he knocks into your shoulder and goes back downstairs, clearly ignoring your call of 'fucking dick' to his back.

you scoff and shake your head, turning back around to say something to abby before you slightly step back at the look on her face. its dark, like if owen didn't leave she would have kicked his ass first, and now it's trained at you. you know she'd never hurt you, though. partially because she cares about you too much, and partially because you always keep a taser in your back pocket whenever you go to a party.

"abby? what's wrong? did he fucking say something to you?

she laughs before grabbing your arm and pulling you into the room, shutting the door behind you and locking it. her long legs take seconds to reach the bed, her arm releasing when your body sits and bounces slightly on the bed as she stands above you.

"its...its nothing, just owen being a dick like always."

her voice is strained and her hands are tensing into fists, telltale signs that she was really pissed off. you hold her hands in yours, pressing little kisses to her knuckles. normally you hated being so sappy, but you knew that being cute with her was a quick way to calm her down.

"don't worry. i can guarantee one of these days someone is gonna kick his ass. unless i do it first, and you know i want to." you joke and smile when she laughs, gripping her hands so she can sit on the bed next to you.

"yeah, youre right."

"im always right. you should learn that if you wanna stick with me."

she shakes her head before looking at you in silence, and you feel your face get hot under her gaze. you'd never admit it to her but seeing her so angry really did something for you. the bottom of your leg rubs against hers, and her eyes dart down before trailing up your legs to the point where your skirt is starting to ride up your bare thighs.

"here, babe? seriously?"

you sigh, figuring she was right and having your first time together in some stranger's house during a party was horribly tacky. you start to move your leg before she grabs it and puts it on the bed before grabbing you and resting you in her lap.

"i didn't tell you to stop."

so yes, you did get tacky in a strangers house. and back in abby's dorm. and again after you both showered.

so if there was one thing you could ever thank owen for, it was finally giving you both the push you needed to take the next step in your relationship. but after that night things were a little strained, as abby and owen were on a no-contact basis, their fight having something to deal with them and maybe you although she wouldn't go into details, which just led to this drama also spreading to mel since she was dating owen and was always pretty neutral when it came to you and tense when it came to abby, and mel was close friends to leah who was now close to you and...

it was complicated.

but you were used to not having people around. you had abby, nora, manny, and tonya, and that was all you really needed. speaking of tonya, you don't think you've ever seen anyone as happy for someone else's relationship as you did when you told tonya that you and abby got together. she said it was 'half happy that you found someone for you and half happy that someone will finally get the stick out of your ass.'

but your bliss was partially broken when your mother called a week after you had your last finals to let you know she and her father were going to be visiting seattle to talk to you about something important. at this point you hadn't talked to either of your parents since winter when your dad had not so discreetly told you he would be on your ass about skiing again as soon as your leg was alright again. and you were definitely going to dread every minute you had to spend trying to cordial to them, don't even mention finally introducing them to your girlfriend who you so far had never told them about.

for a few days after the call, you must have been acting weird because abby could tell something was wrong and took you to a relaxing little cafe she had found when she first got to the city. you're sipping on a milkshake while abby does the same across from you, digging into her stack of blueberry pancakes, waiting for you to tell her what's going on while she talks about her schedule now that school is out.

"manny's gonna be gone for a month because of his music internship, so i was wondering if you wanted to come and stay at mine while he's gone. we can watch movies, dance to music, or we can practice those recipes i saw on tiktok."

"mhm, that sounds nice, babe." you continue to at least show minimal attention to what she's saying, briefly slurping at your shake until she speaks again.

"yup. but after that, i might have to leave for a while, i haven't seen my dad in forever and he wanted me to stay for two weeks while my aunt is visiting salt lake."

her words slowly die out when she notices how you stop slurping your drink, your eyes staring into space as your thumb scratches at your palm.

throughout your relationship, you had told abby the rundown of your relationship with your parents maybe once. at first, it was because it was a touchy subject and you would be embarrassed if she knew the reason for the way you acted the way you did and thought your baggage was too much for her.

and then it was because deep down you were jealous. they had their ups and downs, but abby had such a pure relationship with her father that sometimes it made you sick. while he didnt flaunt his wealth because of his principles, but abby would tell you about all the times when she was younger that her dad would give her the best birthday parties, take her with him to conferences around the world, and made sure she had anything she desired.

so when you had to tell her that the most your dad did was give you a break to be a normal adult instead of shaping you into a champion, you don't think there was ever a time that you secretly envied her more.

"this is about your dad, isn't it?" she whispered, reaching across the table to take your hand in hers. you nodded, relieved that your girlfriend could read you like a book and you didnt have to say it out loud.

"could you tell me more about it?"

shit.

you sighed, a deep breath leaving your body and clearing your head.

"my parents are gonna be here soon. said they wanted to talk to me about something "important", which means my dad thinks i've had enough time to recover from my leg being nearly snapped in two because he thinks he knows better than the doctor. but hey, maybe when i was gone he got another fuckin degree to throw in my face."

while you ranted abby never said a word, just paying close attention and providing you comfort. out of everyone in the crew, she was always the person people went to talk to when they needed it. she said it was something she got from her mom.

"all my life he's been like this. just pushing me and pushing me until im at the point of breaking until i use my anger to win. there's no doubt he's still doing it. heard my brother is being scouted at his games and he's only fifteen."

abby nods and presses a kiss to your hand, treading carefully with what she says next. "your dad sounds...horrible, honestly. he never...hit you did he?"

you feel your body jerk back and both of your eyes go big at your reaction.

"no, no he would never. im serious. wouldn't make sense from a logical standpoint, id be in front of other people all the time and any injuries would fuck up my skiing."

"well that's a bleak way of looking at it, but im glad he didnt. but the other shit is still bad."

"yeah. definitely not looking forward to dealing with that again in two weeks."

"i know, but im here, and im gonna stick by you every step of the way, alright? even if your parents find out they hate me and curse my bloodline."

you couldn't help but snort at her. "nobody could hate you, anderson. you would annoy them too much and make dirty bets against them."

"what? that wasn't a dirty bet! you'd just never seen my skills before and i used it to my advantage."

"whatever you say abs."

abbys reassurance and patience helped greatly, and by the time you met your parents at their hotel for breakfast, you weren't nervous about whatever bullshit they had to say.

but for some odd reason, they were very cordial. your mom asked you about school, how your grades were, and how you liked your chosen major. when it got to the point if you were seeing anyone, you not so subtly gushed about abby and she seemed really happy for you. your dad even praised you for picking another sportsman, avoiding your look while he ate his eggs.

a week later you even had the courage to introduce them to abby, who told you she would cook something for all of you to eat.

that tiktok recipe she was talking about? it was ratatouille. and you had to admit it was delicious, and you wondered how abby was so good at so many things and she told you when she was a kid she wanted to learn how to do basically everything and her dad was more than happy to indulge her. sometimes you really wondered how she didn't appear to be so spoiled.

but your girl was nothing if not a charmer, and by the end of the night your mom was gushing over how much she liked abby and thought she was a great match for you.

your dad was...your dad. he acted polite, asking abby about her intentions, if she was dedicated to her studies and sports and you at the same time. blah blah blah. abby gave perfect human resources-like answers that she knew would make you giggle and loosen up.

once dinner was over your mother insisted on staying a little while longer to watch a movie, finding out she and your girlfriend both had soft spots for mamma mia and grease and planned to drink some wine and let loose for once. while the two were watching meryl streep panic on screen your dad tapped you on the shoulder and asked if he could speak to you in private, and you were mentally prepared to get into yet another argument.

"i know i'm the last person who gets to say this but..you've seemed to have really grown this past year. I'm proud of you."

"thanks. i guess."

he sighs, shifting on his feet. "i know i've always been hard on you and your brothers. i just-i knew that if you had guidance you could be phenomenal at whatever you do."

"yeah, dad, but that doesn't mean forcing me to train for ten hours a day when i was still in third grade." you could list more instances of him being overbearing and partially ruining your childhood, but you don't feel like being the person who makes the conversation go sour.

"i know. trust me, i know. look, your mother has us going to a shrink and...one of the steps is asking for forgiveness and whatever mumbo jumbo."

you almost snort but pass it off as a sneeze. your dad in therapy was about as believable as a talking donkey.

"well, it's nice to hear dad but it's not gonna be just as easy as being nice to me and my girlfriend for a night."

"i know. which is why i wanted to show you this."

he pulls out and his phone and after a few taps shows you an article. you read the word 'olympics' and nearly blow before he cuts you off.

"just listen, alright? one of the big coaches was caught and fired for doping a bunch of the players, so they're postponing the winter games for another few years for investigations to see if there's any more misconduct."

"are you serious?"

"deadly. and i know with your leg and your schooling you'll have your hands full but, i figured the best way i knew how to bond with you was to help you. it'd be enough time to get extensive physical therapy and train up. but only if you want to."

"dad, i. i really don't know what to say."

"you don't have to say anything, at least not now. just promise me you'll think about it, alright? and if by next spring you still don't want to, I'll never bring it back up again."

after that, your mother comes and says they should get going to get enough sleep for their flight tomorrow, and you bid your parents goodbye with stiff hugs and a genuine smile.

for the next few months into your sophomore year your on the fence. when you were a kid, despite the pain and the tears and the bruises, there was nothing you loved more than skiing. you swear that the adrenaline rushes you would get speeding down slopes were better than anything you've ever experienced, even sex.

(when abby heard you say that one night on the couch, she pouted and wouldn't touch you for a week, telling you to go back to those stupid slopes if that's how you felt.)

but the point was that you were basically going through a beginning life crisis. either stick with the new normal you've created and potentially miss out on fulfilling your childhood dreams, or take a risk and potentially come out more damaged than before.

you were planning on spending the next thanksgiving mulling it over, but to your shock baby invited you to come with her to her dad's house for thanksgiving with her family. when checking in with her to see if she and her dad would be ok with this big step, she told you it was actually her dad's idea and she'd be more than happy to have you meet her family.

you swear to god you have never been more nervous on a plane than you were on the flight to salt lake, only being soothed by the constant free drinks you get in first class, the six hundred page book in your hands, and abbys large hand constantly rubbing on your thigh and back. you suggested that you both join the mile-high club as a joke and she seemed a little too into it.

"babe please, i promise ill be quick. i can even put my fingers in your mouth."

"abby, i was just joking. im not gonna do that and get kicked off the plane. god, you're so fuckin weird."

"you make me weird. pretty please? ill pull out the puppy eyes."

"i really don't give a fuck."

and you come to find out that abby's stories were true because her dad is so weirdly nice. he greets you at the airport like he's known you all your life, and is eager to find conversation the whole drive to his house where you both are staying.

you were glad that like you abby had a smaller family, or at least one she spent thanksgiving with. after her father you only had to introduce yourself to her aunt and her small family, a husband who you have to look down at and likes to boast about his coin collection, and three children. the eldest, ashley, was closer in age to you and abby and was clearly abby's favorite cousin. the middle child was a wild child named kris, who didn't seem at all phased that you were a stranger and kept asking you if you'd ever heard of their favorite anime series.

now, you've never been the best with children, you repeatedly told your mother to throw your baby brother in the trash when you were six, but you couldn't help but fawn over abby's baby cousin lyle, the cutest infant you've ever seen who after a few hours of fussing because of the time change, he calms down into a smiling drooling little thing who, although he keeps tugging at your hair when his mom hands you to him, seemed to actually enjoy your presence and laughs like its the funniest thing ever.

you didnt catch the way abby looked at you fondly while you were playing around with her cousin or the way she swatted her father away when he called her out on it.

so thanksgiving was easy, a peaceful week full of meeting kind people and eating some surprisingly good food. but you didn't even get a week of peace after before abby brought it up.

christmas.

yes the holiday was full of joy and warmth when you were a child. but after a mini teenage rebellion and your energy you just...gave up on the holiday completely. last year you spent it alone inside your dorm which wasn't the worst thing on earth. you got to watch corny feel-good movies like national lampoons, drink hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, and had free reign to the library since the librarian apparently used to watch your games on tv. it wasn't like it used to be, but it was enough.

"so, you're coming with us to the cabin right?" nora reaches across the library table and takes one of your fries from the fast food you sneaked in. for some reason she refused to order her own fries, content to pluck the ones from your container.

"what? what cabin?"

"god, abby hasn't told you about this by now? i thought she would have taken you there already and made it her love shack or something." she quickly ducks her head when you toss a burnt fry at her, looking around to make sure no one saw. "it's her dad's cabin at one of the ski ranges in the mountains, she invites us every year for christmas break or new years if we can't make it."

"first, you're a perv. second, i don't know why she hasn't told me about it. id probably tease her for it anyway."

"well when you see her next ask her, because you definitely have to come with us this year."

"i don't know, nors. you know how i feel about skiing right now..."

"you don't have to ski! we literally never do, as sad as it is. we just hang out, go out for drinks, and hit the skiing town. im telling you cold resort parties are insane."

you take a minute to mull it over, staring into space as you tap your fingers on the hardwood table. nora fingers tap on the top of your hand.

"i understand you're going through things, with your dad and all. you don't have to come if you don't want to. but i know we'd really enjoy it if you came, especially abby."

you nod and eat another fry before gegging back to the novel you were reading, some 'all-time classic' abby had said you had to read.

you saw abby a few hours after that, yet again staying the night at her dorm to kick off the following weekend. when you entered using your spare key the smell of chinese food instantly hit you, and it took you by surprise since abby normally insisted on cooking for you and manny.

you set down your things and kicked off your shoes before heading into the little kitchenette, hearing the sound of rather loud whispers that stopped as soon the roommates saw you, noodles stuffed into both of their mouths.

"what the fuck are yall starin at?"

manny snorts before making some weird excuse for leaving, telling you he's meeting up with some meteorology student at a bar and he won't be home until tomorrow. you bid him. a quick goodbye before turning back to abby, the blonde picking through her food.

its only then that you notice the gauze wrapped around her palm, quickly cross the threshold to gently but firmly raise her hand up to your face to observe it.

your about to go on a triade when you see that sad pout on her face.

"tell me who did this to you." you grumble, putting on a fake deep voice.

she chuckles and shakes her head. "you're so weird."

"only because of you. tell me what happened."

"i was trying to cook before we ordered takeout and i just...got distracted and burned my hand. its not a big deal, don't worry about it."

you tell by the way her shoulders were tensing that she was getting into one of her moods, always hating when she failed at something and hating even more when people kept asking her about it.

"well im always gonna worry about, something that's also your fault by the way. what made you distracted."

"nothing."

"abs."

"please just drop it."

"abigail."

she groans before slumping her head into her arms on the counter.

so you decide to drop it. at least for a little while. you put away the rest of the food, deciding to eat the box she bought for you after her mood had been resolved before figuring you'd leave her alone while you took a shower.

but if there was one thing you knew about abby, it was that she took 'golden retriever energy' to a whole nother level. aka most of the time she couldn't leave you alone and followed you near everywhere. after only a few minutes, you heard the shower door open and felt her large arms circle around your waist and her head rest on your shoulders.

"i wanna ask you something. there's this cabin my dad owns that we all head to for winter break and stuff-"

you felt your heart skip a beat. to be honest part of the reason you were nervous about abby asking you this was because you were second-guessing yourself and your relationship. you hadn't even been together for a full year at this point, and even if you knew you loved her and that she adored you, you didnt want to be the one to bring up this thing she does with people she's known for years and get your heart damaged.

"and i wanted to invite you to go with us because i just know youd make it feel so much more special."

"i feel like a 'but' goes at the end of that sentence."

she rubs her head into your shoulder more, kissing at the soft and wet skin of your shoulder blade.

"i didn't tell you much. about my fight with owen. but everyone knows we haven't been talking much, but he's still been my friend since elementary, and i was hoping that maybe during the trip we could resolve things. but if he ever said something to you or about you i think id go fucking crazy."

your turn around and hold her head in your hands. her body is still slumped so her head is more at your level and her pretty blue eyes stare right into yours.

"i appreciate that. your slight anger issues make me feel honored." a smile quirks on her face and she nuzzles her head into your palms more. "and as much as he pisses me off, i don't know how i feel about causing a greater rift between you and your friends. ive only been with you less than a hear, he's known you for-"

"year or not doesn't matter. you mean...so much to me i can't put into words. the only reason i was nervous all day was that i didnt know how to make this sound like i wasn't putting him before you because i wouldn't. ever."

you look at her a bit longer, swiping away wet pieces of her hair back from her face so you can see all of her. because she's looking at you like she can do the same.

you both take an intimate shower without a word, helping the other bathe and lather her hair in apricot shampoo she's become addicted to. once you exit, dry off, and change into some matching fluffy pajamas she bought for you both, you finally head back to the kitchen to eat your food before turning on a movie.

it was only because you both decided to choose some random movie that the stupid thought crossed into your mind.

"could you imagine if we were that touchy all the time? we're already halfway there and it drives your friends nuts." you poked her cheek while you were resting on her, her arm wrapped around your shoulders while your legs intertwined on the couch.

"what do you mean?"

"just like, overdoing it. always with an arm around the other, making eyes across the room. if you wanna get extreme you could carry me on your back."

"or i could carry you on my front."

the shift of her hips and the tone of her voice makes you turn your head to look at her, nearly busting out laughing at the way her eyes are glued to the screen while she chews on her lower lip.

"stop doing that."

"doing what? im watching the movie. watch the movie with me."

"this is just like on the plane. y'know i was kidding about the exhibitionist thing at first-"

"baby, please."

"please what?"

she groaned while you just giggled at her, moving your bodies so she was sitting up on the couch and you were on top of her, adjusting your hips so you were straddling her waist.

"what're you thinking about, bunny?"

a subtle whine escaped from her throat and you smirked in triumph. there was nothing your girl loved more than being called the softest and cutest pet names, and you would frequently use it to your advantage, like the time when she refused to help you cheat on a test 'on principle' and you rested your face on her thigh from under the desk with a 'please, princess?' and she happily gave you the answers after roughly grinding herself on your tongue.

"i just...maybe if we played it up at the cabin owen would finally fuck off and realize im yours. i just thought it'd be funny."

you felt a warm feeling in your chest at the thought, showing your girl all the affection she craved from you on an idyllic vacation while also showing that dick owen who's boss. maybe then he'd finally let whatever his issue with you go. or not. at this point you didnt care.

"ok. we can do it."

"what? are you serious? i was half joking. i don't wanna make you do anything you don't want to-"

you cut off her sweet rambles with a press of your lips to hers. her arms brought you in closer until your breasts were squished into hers.

when abby texted the group chat the next morning next to you in bed to let the others know you'd be joining, you couldn't help but feel warm at the replies.

manny : thank god, i need a drinking partner since no one ever wants irish hot chocolate

leah : because the last time you made it you got drunk by five pm and kept singing baby its cold outside while doing both parts

jordan : and badly

manny : haters

nora : omg thank god

nora : this is all because of me btw

nora : tell y/n we're gonna have sooo much fun

manny : wait is she gonna ski

jordan : stop.

you giggled at your friends' antics. you were already imagining all the crazy things that would happen on the trip and happily listened to all the stories abby had to tell you.

mel : cant wait for the trip! hoping ben's is still open.

owen : 👍🏻

a snort escaped from you. "oh hes so pissed."

"definitely." abby agreed before turning the phone off and snuggling into your neck to relax for a little while longer. "prepare, he's probably just gonna get angrier from our masterful plan."

"technically my plan. and are you sure you still wanna do it? i don't wanna drive a wedge between you guys."

"he started that at that party. either he's gonna deal with me changing for the better or im gonna leave him in the dust. now shush, im going to sleep."

your hand smooths through abby's locks as she drifts back into sleep, and you soon follow her into it, dreaming of pale snow and the sight of the slopes.

the nex two weeks before break starts you're horrifically busy, finishing up some tests while also buying and packing everything you'll need for the trip. which is really just an excuse for you to get a bunch of those cute thick sweaters you saw on ebay but that's neither here nor there.

once your last class was finished abby immediately called an uber to take you to the airport, citing that as the host she always headed to the cabin earlier than everyone else to fix it up and stock up on little things, everyone would need or forget like extra blankets and lots and lots of water. during the trip to the airport, waiting in the airport since you were both 'get there hours before the flight' girls, and on the flight itself, abby was telling you stories of the cabin and what has happened on the past few trips that you should know about.

apparently, the cabin (in aspen, which you teased her was so basic) was bought by her grandparents (more teasing) for family trips when her dad was little. but as his siblings got older and started their own families the trips dwindled down, until his parents decided to just leave the place to him, telling him not to sell it for anything since it was worth a fat load of cash by now. hed take abby and her mom there before she passed, and then once she turned sixteen told her he trusted her enough to bring her friends up there if they could.

"honestly, i think it was part of him being nice and feeling sad we didn't spend much time together then. we were still mourning and he was always working." she sinks into her first-class seat, sipping on her complimentary ginger ale can. "but we're better now, and i get to have a laid-back vacation with my friends every year."

"sounds like a win-win to me. traumatic way you got there and all."

"you of all people saying that is hilarious, truly."

a few hours of talking and napping later and you've landed in colorado, a rental car waiting for you in the airport parking lot.

"abs, you are so secretly bougie. like, why didn't you rent a private car that time yours was in the shop and we were stuck in the rain downtown?"

"it's for emergencies and the necessary."

driving through the roads of aspen snowmass is something close to magical. at this point, the sun has set and the twinkling lights of the villages are everywhere, and you can see a plethora of christmas decorations inside shop windows.

when abby parks outside of the cabin your jaw is close to dropping, and you have to hold it up once you step inside. there was obviously a lot of wood, making up the floors, walls, and beams that connect both. but it was also decorated with relaxed brown and cream furniture.

"i want you to know if we get married, im not signing a prenup."

abby cackles before sneaking up behind you and tickling your waist, cackling at your shriek followed by a scowl.

"'if' babe, really? nice to know you're so committed."

"i'll be more committed if you give me a tour of this place."

the cabin was big, of course. enough bedrooms for your whole group and a few more. you honestly couldn't pick your favorite. there was a game room with a pool table you were just itching to beat jordan and leah at, a hot tub outside on the deck looking down onto the village that looked like the perfect place to drink champagne with nora talking shit about her recent ex.

"now, this is what i really wanted you to see," abby smiles before pushing open a wide set of doors on the upper floor and revealing to you the grand bedroom. there's a giant bed against the back wall, with a warm little nook tucked into a bay window.

"it's so nice here abs, really. i can't wait for everyone to get here so we can start doing stuff." you drop your bags by the front of the bed and flop your behind onto it, loving the way it bounces you up and down a bit. and you can tell that abby also loves it by the way she's staring at the way your boobs jiggle.

"im glad you like it, baby. but we don't have to wait for the others to get here to have some fun." a pervy little smile lights up her face and she starts inching towards you, making stupid little grabby hands as she does so.

"you're insatiable. aren't we supposed to be making sure this place is ready for everyone else?"

"wasn't it your idea for us to play everything up for fun? that includes sex. a lot of it. strap-ons are allowed on planes, by the way. and other things."

"...seriously?"

"seriously."

at this point, her arms are caging you into the plush of the comforter, and you don't know whether to look at the veins in her arms or her eyes or her mouth-

"you're staring, pretty."

"well you're all i can see, gorgeous."

she presses a soft kiss to the underside of your chin, her tounge poking out to lick down your neck.

"god, abs, please."

"please what?"

you groan and she just laughs at you.

the hardest part of being a switch was that abby could just throw shit back in your face when she became more dominant. it was both infuriating and arousing.

“im not gonna say it."

"you sure?" her large hand slips beneath the band of your pants until its resting over your underwear, teasing you.

"yes i a-am!" your refusal is cut off when two of her thick fingers slide inside of you, filling you up in the most delicious way. it doesn't help your case that there's no restriction, the wetness between your thighs letting her know just how much you were enjoying this.

"y'know, your master plan isn't exactly gonna work if you have an attitude with me, baby." her words are gravelly as she speakes into the crease of your neck, occasionally looking up at you to ingrain your reactions into her memory.

"god, abs."

"this is one the things i love most about you acting like a brat, just means i get to fuck and love on you until it goes away. and i've got all the time in the fuckin world."

just when you start getting close to your orgasm, you could've sworn in the distance you heard the sound of a door opening before closing a few minutes later. the feeling of abby kissing you and adding a third finger inside of you. you decided to just drop it

later on, after a nice long shower and putting on this cute warm sweater you bought, you and abby decided it was time to head out and get enough groceries to last for around two weeks until everyone else would arrive and decide what meals they would want after. it was very entertaining to watch abby standing in a fluorescently lit market aisle decide if she wanted to make a giant chicken pot pie or some creamy chicken soup one of her teammates told her about. she just stuck her tongue out when you looked at her.

once you returned to the cabin you could hear some music coming from inside the house, and despite your initial worry abby just smiled and rushed inside, your brain seriously wondering if you had chosen correctly romantically.

you headed inside with a few of the bags, setting them on the kitchen counters before heading to the source of the music that appeared to be coming from the living room. once you cross the threshold you are happily surprised to see your girlfriend and manny talking and laughing in the middle of the room.

"ah! nice to know abs hasn't broken you already." manny comes over to give you a big hug before setting you down and shaking your shoulders, just laughing when you start smacking his hands.

"jeez, what is with you guys? be normal."

"you forget im abby's roommate. this is because of you. you gave me this trauma."

you roll your eyes before patting him on the shoulder.

"ok, ok. why did you come early? when do the others get here?" abby asks from her place still on the couch.

"what, i cant just come because i love and miss two of my best friends."

the room is silent as you both stare at him.

"well just so you know, that was half true. but also," he looks down a dark hallway before tugging you closer to the couch so he can speak quietly. "mel and owen are here."

you blink. "thats...odd."

"very odd, but maybe it's a good thing? who knows, maybe owen's gotten over the whole fight and wants to put it to bed." abby turns to you, those big blue eyes filled with hope that you don't have the heart to squash with a joke.

"yeah, maybe."

"well if he did do that, i don't think he's in the mood for it now." manny chuckles.

"why not?"

"he was confused to see a car in the driveway, so he came by two hours ago and left like two minutes later. his face was as red as a tomato, you know how he looks when he's flushed."

oh my god.

you turned to abby and her cheeks were puffed, a clear sign she was trying not to laugh.

well, it looks like your plan was already working.

the next three days were more laid back, just spent taking a chance to relax and sleep in after your grueling semester. you decided to spend these days exploring more of the cabin, admiring all of the rooms and the random really pretty art pieces on some of the walls.

you swore that nothing could beat the bliss you felt on that second day, waking up to the faint sun in your eyes and abby gently snoring next to you, deciding to cook up a bunch of waffles, one of the meals you excelled at, and read a four hundred page book on the sofa.

(the plan was still in motion at this point, just more tame.

once jordan, leah, and nora came things really took a turn for the exciting. after hearing that you'd been cooped in the house these past few days, leah insisted you come with them to some bars and other hot spots around town. you hadn't been drinking much lately but figured that since you were surrounded by people you trusted and a bunch of strangers you'd be able to handle yourself.

and you did.

for the most part.

you just weren't expecting the bartender to be the chillest girl you've ever met and make a killer strawberry daiquiri, because before you knew it they were playing some old-school song over the speakers and were hanging off of leah's arm like a koala.

"oh my god, im so glad you invited me out. this place rules. have you tried the daiquiris? serenity said she'd make me one more but you can have it."

"her name is trinity, and you're getting touchy. where's abs?"

you shrug and she shakes her head, looking over your shoulders to see if she can spot the hulking blonde. she waves someone over and then abby is in your vision, a soft expression on her face as she tugs your body into hers.

"how much have you had to drink, baby?"

"mmmm, not too much. i could walk in a gay line. look, i even made a corny joke!"

"yes, you did." she squats down a little bit and you wrap your arms around her neck and your legs around her waist, trying to restrain yourself from making any noises when she lifts you with ease to the amusement of some of the people in the bar.

"how about we head back and take a long bath, pretty. ill even try those rose face masks you bought."

you were about to agree when out of the corner of your eye you catch owen, sitting inside a booth with jordan and manny, sparing looks in your direction.

you smirk down at her and she can already guess what you're thinking, tightening her grip on your hips.

"or we can do that later. and dance now."

you nod and loosen your legs for her to drop you but she just holds you tighter for a moment, leaning her head up to place a heated kiss on your lips before pulling away, fighting to ignore the tiny string of spit that connects your lips to hers.

"ok. now we can dance."

abby told you the next day that owen had asked to talk to her one on one in the morning and she didn't really understand what it meant. he apologized for lashing out at her, apparently, but still didnt agree with some of the 'drastic changes to her personality' that were happening lately.

you really tried to promise her that you wouldn't cuss him out, telling you she'd handle it later after having a conversation with manny to figure out when the hell he started acting like this.

focus on tried.

you and nora were in the kitchen that night making cups of hot chocolate, taking the chance to top them with all the stuff you weren't allowed to as a child. also probably increasing your risks of cavities, but whatever, it was nostalgic. you were laughing at the absurd abundance of whipped cream in her mug and the three candy canes in yours when you heard footsteps coming into the kitchen, looking over to see owen looking over some things in the fridge.

you looked at nora. she looked at you.

"so owen, how are things going with mel?"

his hand pauses over some leftover noodles, gripping it with a fist.

"we're great actually, thanks for asking norsie."

noras eye twitches, bumping into your shoulder before leaving the room to rest in the kitchen and wait for you before starting a movie.

owen turns and suddenly its just the two of you. staring at each other. you with a three-caned hot cocoa and he with a tupperware of linguine.

"what's your fucking problem."

his eyebrows shoot up, almost like he wasn't expecting you to actually bring up the tension at hand.

"y/n, is this really the time-"

"yes, it is the goddamn time to ask you why you've been acting like a dick to me and my girlfriend."

his mouth quirks downwards and you nearly laugh at the realization of the words, the glances, how he would look at abby sometimes like a kicked puppy even when his damn girlfriend sat on his lap, it was all because he couldn't move the fuck on.

"seriously? that's the reason? you've been putting me, putting abby through hell because you're still hung up over her? this is my worst gay nightmare."

"it's because ever since she's been with you shes been different, always acting like she's some better person now that she's over me. like i was the thing holding her back. how do you think that makes me feel, huh?"

you stare at him after his quiet outburst, his face that signature shade of pink and his eyes enraged. but he doesn't scare you.

you walk closer to him, entertained by the way she avoids you like the plague, and presses his back into the refrigerator. you want to lash out more, to scream at him until your throat is sore, to whisper all the little flaws about him you've noticed over the past year that are driving everyone away, but you won't.

"i hope it makes you feel like the heap of shit you are. goodnight, moore."

when abby feels you snuggle into her later that night, feeling your hands squeeze into her stomach from behind you, she asks if everything is ok, and you press a kiss to her cheek and tell her to go back to sleep.

the next morning it's christmas eve, and everyone is in the dining room eating breakfast and talking about how everyone somehow has no plans when you make a suggestion for the day.

"i wanna go hit the slopes today."

you swear most of them look at you like you've grown another head that just started trying to sing the tequila song.

manny continues chewing his eggs before giving you a thumbs up, but you can tell he's secretly been waiting for this. after you first met he asked you if you've ever skied again after your accident and then dropped it when you gave him a death glare. but since you've gotten closer he knows more about how it's not that you can't ski, but almost as if there was a mental block that stopped you from doing so.

"uhm...sure. i can see if we can do that. are you sure you want to?" abby rests her arms on the table and leans her head into yours, trying to give a sense of privacy for your answer.

"i'm not made of glass, abby. it's about time i get back out there. its the only way i'll known for sure about what my dad said."

"what'd your dad say?" mel speaks up from the opposite side of the table, her hand rested over owen's on top of the wood.

you straighten your shoulders. "some stupid doping scandal got the olympics postponed, and my dad said if i wanter he thinks he could get me back in shape by then to apply."

"holy shit! i mean, it's your choice obviously, but that's cool as hell. i think you should do it." jordan exclaims, sipping on his orange juice through a straw.

"wait, what about your leg? you've only had problems with it a couple of times, but is it alright enough to go ski?" nora asks. she was the one who besides abby you've told the most about your skiing problems, and once took you to the pharmacy to pick up your pain meds like it was no hassle.

"it's better if i don't push myself too much, but the blue and reds should be a piece of cake."

you look at abby, and even though she has no idea why you've had this sudden change of heart, she can hear the subtle excitement in your voice and nods her head at you with a smile.

thanks to everyone always waking up at the break of dawn for some reason, you're checked in to the slopes and ready to go only three hours later. jordan and manny even decided to join you and try their hands at the bunny slopes, the rest of the group deciding to find somewhere to sit and relax while they watched you all.

"mama please, you're embarrassing me." manny groans while you tilt his head from side to side to make sure all of the straps for his helmet and goggles are secure. you weren't about to have him getting a concussion and blaming you for bringing him here or the workers for their sloppy job.

"no one knows better ski safety than me. now shush, I'm almost done."

once you were finished you gently smacked his head and headed to the side of where the slope ends, abby beaming at you from over the rail. she was wearing this cute little beanie she bought for the trip and this all-black bomber jacket that made her look so much bigger than she already is.

"hello? babe, did you hear what i said?" abby's hand waves in front of your face bringing you back to focus. you slowly blink and she shakes her head. "you're so weird."

"again, i get that from you."

"whatever." her gloved hand rests on your face and she brings you closer so she can press a soft kiss onto your lips. when she tries to pull away but your arms are wrapping around her neck and pulling her body into yours, starting an impromptu makeout session before jordans wolf call yanks you out of it.

her fingers reach up to push a strand of hair back into your helmet. "are you sure you'll be ok up there? if your leg hurts just pull over to the side and i'll try to come up and help you-"

you cut her off with another kiss. "i'll be fine, princess. don't worry about me. just worry about all those losers I'm gonna show up."

she laughs that cute and loud little laugh of hers and sends you off, waving to you multiple times when she sees you go up the lift.

once you are at the top you go over everything again, making sure all of your equipment is snug, the track in front of you is good, and your skis are tight and before you know it you're standing at the top of the slope breathing heavy and feeling like you're about to have a panic attack.

your head feels like it's on fire and you swear that you are close to passing out when someone taps on your shoulder. you turn around and it's some teen by his face unobstructed by the goggles, a go-pro attached to his helmet.

"hey, sorry if i'm being annoying but, you're y/n l/n right?"

you nod, hoping he can't see the strained expression on your face.

"i just wanted to say that i think you're like, so cool. i saw that video of you training for the super g at thirteen and it changed my life, seriously."

your head felt a bit better at the memory. the adrenaline you got skiing down slopes at top speeds and then dodging the flags your father asked the owners if he could put on the track to help you train. they were nice people, and even let you pick what flags you wanted. a mix of pink and black.

"thank you. i swore that training took everything out of me. but at least i didn't have to worry about how i was doing in algebra."

he laughs and bobs his head. he clears his throat before slightly hopping on his two feet.

"you ok, kid?"

"yes, yeah, i just... ya see i have this youtube channel where i post videos of me riding down the slopes, helping beginners, trying the harder slopes, and stuff like that." he taps the go bro on his helmet. "and i was wondering if you wanted to do like, a friendly little race? i don't know, you don't have to i know you're leg is probably still healing, i can just go if you wa-"

"i'll do it."

his eyes bulge, surprised at your answer. you have to admit you're slightly surprised too. you weren't planning on doing anything more than inching your way down the intermediate slope a few times, but the memory of the super g has energy suddenly rushing through you. besides, it'd be a nice distraction from everything else. your dad. owen. you.

when you both get to the edge of the slope, you let him know you'll give him a twenty-second head start before you follow. he nods, and a few seconds later you're skiing for the first time in years.

and it feels fucking great.

at the speeds you are going the wind is whipping across the unprotected parts of your face, the stinging cold keeping you focused as you turn around trick hills and get your legs used to the feeling of slight strain. but your legs feel fine, and that makes you feel even better.

before long you can see the kid ahead of you and your friends in the close distance, nora's red coat bobbing up and down as she cheers for you. only five seconds after you pass your fan and can hear his slight spluttering before you're bringing your skis to a stop and the ice is flying from underneath them.

your heart is pounding as the kid, who tells you his name is aidan, thanks you for 'kicking his ass, i swear it'll get so many views". he tells you he'll tag you, and you do him one better by saying you'll follow him back and you're a little scared he's about to have a heart attack before he leaves to check in with his parents.

"oh my god oh my god oh my god! that was so fucking cool! i really thought you were gonna wipe out there for a second but I'm glad you didn't." leah squeezes your body in a hug rocking you from side to side. "are you gonna go again? if you do i swear I'll put on some skis and go down the bunny slope."

you throw your head back with a laugh, imagining leah slowly going down the snow while pizza and french frying her skis. you bask in the compliments given to you by nora who was watching the whole time and manny who tells you he successfully completed the green slope with no falls or bumps. you feel the urge to talk to abby, to have her tell you she's proud of you when you see her near one of the equipment cabins, talking to owen.

"are you gonna go again or do you wanna stop for the day?"

you look at nora with a grin. "yeah, i'll go again."

later that night, after a few more hours of racing your friends and even seeing a few more fans who recognized you, even one lady who said she remembered you based on your form, everyone is headed back to the house to end the day after getting some drink from the community lodge

for some reason, abby hasn't talked to you since, and based on what you saw you're preparing for the damn worst. a small part of you knows you might be overreacting, that there's no way she would fall for the bullshit more had to say to her, but her avoidance of you isn't helping that little part take charge.

like she could read your mind, she's on your tail and following you into your bedroom, taking off her clothes as you do the same but still no word before you head into the shower. under the heat of the water, you rest your head on the wall and close your eyes to try to center yourself. you know abby, you know how much she's done for you. owen wasn't going to get in the way of that and you refused to let him.

you dry yourself off, brush your teeth, moisturize your body, and decide not to put on your pajamas and just this cute robe abby bought for you before leaving the bathroom. after turning off the lights you stop in your tracks, abby sitting on the side of the bed and staring at you.

your feet slowly carry you closer to her before she rolls her eyes and tugs you onto her lap. your face is neutral, even when you can feel the bulge inside of her sweatpants. you tilt your head and she replicates it.

"let me guess, you got an attitude again?"

"you're a fucking hypocrite."

"wh?" her face jerks back in confusion. "what are you talking about?"

"don't play fucking dumb with me abigail. biggest personal growth moment for me in forever and you spend it talking to your damn ex, who if you didn't catch it is still hung up on you, by the way."

"i know, just let me explain-"

"no, i don't want to know. if you're just doing all this as some fucked up way to let me down gently i swear to god-"

you get cut off when one of her hands moves from your waist to cover your mouth, her eyes drooping when you nip at her palm.

"stop it. you know i wouldn't do something that shitty to you, please stop being so paranoid." she waits to gauge your reaction before she decides that you aren't likely to cut her off, softly rubbing at the skin under your eye. "please don't cry."

"im not gonna cry."

"just wanted to make sure. because i care about you, and that's what i was letting owen know that when he was being a jealous dick about you skiing earlier. told him I'm this close to kicking him to the curb for good."

"wait really? what'd he say? i bet he was pissed when i skied over that stuck stump, probably wishes i rode over it and fucking broke my back."

"jeez, you really do despise him." she shakes her head, smiling and rubbing her hands on your thighs. "but yes, he was wondering if maybe now that you were fine to ski you were trying to upstage me or something."

"and do you? and why were you ignoring me?"

she sighed. "literally the opposite. you're just...so amazing, and funny, and talented, and i just know soon you'll be this olympian and wont wanna deal with me and my dumb ex anymore."

"i mean, i am amazing you're right about that," you brag, giggling when she pinches you. "but i'd deal with anything to be with you. i don't even have the words. i wouldn't have gotten on that slope without you always pushing me, despite how annoying i may find it."

abby's' face is beaming and suddenly she's kissing you like you're air, leaning back into the bed so you can hover over her. she stops kissing you just to move her ministrations to all over your face, repeating little 'i love you's' as she does so, reveling in the little hums that leave your throat.

"ok, are we done being sappy so we can fuck now?" your question ends in a squeak when her palm slaps your ass. you look at her with a glare and she just dopily smiles at you, gripping your hips to flip you underneath her.

"y'know, owen and mel picked the room right next to ours." she grinds her hips into yours, the friction of the strap rubbing against you heightened since your robe was riding up to show her bare cunt.

"god, you want me to be loud, don't you?"

"mmhm." she grins as her hand moves down to push the band of her pants down, the feeling of the toy grinding out forcing you to bite your lip to hide your moan, embarrassed by how quickly she could make you want it. her thumbs moves to pull your lip from between your teeth.

she continues humping you until she can see you're wet enough to slide in, looking for your nod to push the strap into you, groaning as it just slides in.

"y/n, we barely did any foreplay-"

"shut up, please shut up."

for some reason she takes that as a sign to start thrusting, reveling in your moans as they finally start to pick up volume. you try to bite the back of your hand when she pulls it away, holding it in hers and holding it above your head. the action is so sweet it almost makes you cry, instead thrusting your head up to press a sweet kiss to her lips.

"mm, love when you're all sweet like this honey. wanna stay like this forever, love you so fuckin much i swear to god." she accentuates her last couple of words with short but harsh thrusts that knock the breath out of your lungs. your orgasm is fast approaching at this rate, and she can tell by the way your eyes are fluttering and your hand is squeezing hers.

"you gonna cum? huh? gonna cum all over me baby?" you nod your head, not trusting the words and sounds that are coming out of your throat. she moves her hand down to rub at your clit and suddenly your stomach is pulsing and your orgasm is hitting you like a truck, abby's following after yours as she's groaning into your neck and thrusting harder to grind the base of the strap into her clit.

it takes a minute for both of you to calm down, the bliss overtaking the both of you.

"was...was that loud enough?" you whisper and feel her silent laugh on top of you, rubbing your leg over the back of hers.

she pushes her head up enough to look you in the eyes, and you really regret asking the question because she's got that dumb-ass smile back on her face and shaking her head.

only a few minutes later she's got you on all fours, leg propped up as she forces your hips back and forth on her dick. and then after that she makes you ride her, and then the position she knows you're obsessed with: her fucking you while standing up.

"a-abs! abby! oh my god!" your throat is sore as her fingers grip the meat of your thighs, the force of her bouncing you and thrusting her hips up getting you closer and closer to euphoria. your eyes are closed and your head is tilted back, doing anything to avoid the way she's looking at you like you're some goddess she's been blessed to witness.

"just a little bit more baby. cmon, tell me how much you love it."

"i do! fuck abby, love it so much."

"love what, honey? you can do it, know you can. god you're so perfect."

your mind is hazy with the feeling of the strap hitting that sensitive spot inside of you with every bounce of your hips and her words that you barely even register her demand, groaning when she bites at one of your tits that have been bouncing in her face.

"tell me what you love. please, please tell me."

"nghh, love you abby! fuckin love your dick so much!"

"that's it, thaaat's it pretty girl. let everyone you're mine, that i'm yours-"

you're pretty sure she kept talking after that, but the rush of your orgasm deafens every sound and lights your body on fire, only able to feel the high and the cum leaking down your thighs. you go in and out of consciousness but come back to when you're both back in bed, abby pulling you onto her chest and she rubs a soft hand down your back.

"love you." you mumble, snuggling into the warmness of her.

"i love you too, y/n."

"'m sorry about earlier."

"me too. promise that i'll tell you whenever i'm feeling down. or when i'm dealing with a douche."

"me too."

you get the best night's sleep you've had in years.

in the morning everyone seems ecstatic for the holiday, ready to share their gifts with each other after breakfast. you decide to join in helping to cook, which gets you a crazy accusation from jordan saying your helping is just 'sitting on the counter so abby has something to look at while you drink a mimosa". whatever. abby is standing between your thighs and talking to you about her new workout schedule when owen and manny walk into the room, manny bidding you a sly 'good morning' with a smirk as owen grabs water from the fridge.

"hey owes, can you hand me one?" abby asks, her fingers drumming on your thigh as she uses the other to catch the bottle he tosses to her with a polite smile. your eyes are following the action suspiciously before abby is for some reason keeping a grip on the middle of the bottle as she opens it so the liquid spurts onto a bit of her shirt.

"ugh, abs! wait a second." you start to move off the counter when she holds your hips down.

"its fine, babe. i'm used to things squirting on me, anyway."

your face scrunches up as you smack her in the shoulder, your face hot as you hear jordan and manny cackling like hyenas and owen chugs down his water. abby just presses a loud kiss on your cheek.

other than your friends constantly teasing you, nora whispering a 'love shack' in your ear when she walks behind you in the living room, the day really is perfect. when the sun sets everyone is exchanging the gifts they got for each other. leah got jordan some necklace he's had his eyes on, manny bought mel some earmuffs after hers broke a month ago. some of them teased you for having surprisingly thoughtful gifts despite having a heart of only half-thawed ice, making you only reply that you weren't past taking the gifts back.

and then you open the gift abby got you and nearly cry; a custom snow globe, inside two mini figures dancing on a mountain of snow, one wearing skis and the other wearing skates. the she almost does the same with the corny 'cooking for two' book you bought her and the limited edition version of her favorite novel.

its a night full of warmth and laughter, and once it ends you find yourself standing out on the balcony, looking out at the lit lights of the village and the lifts on the slopes. your phone is in your hand and you open the text messages to your dad.

tell everyone i said merry christmas. its going to take me time to mentally heal enough to train. but if you're willing to do it with me then i'm in.

"hey, it's fucking freezing out here." abby opens the slide-apart door and comes up beside you, wrapping her arms around you to look out at the view with you. "are you ok?"

you sigh, turning to admire her. the redness of her cheeks, the tiny snowflakes in her hair. the way she's looking at you.

you nod your head.

"i'm on top of the world."

fics keep getting longer to overcompensate allah take me now. spent so much of yesterday aka my birthday writing this omg but it was so fun to write a more developed reader. uhhh idk stream cobra by megan.

[iliektehhaxs]

So close, and yet so far

Aka: Johnny finds a new obsession in you.

Pairing: John “Soap” MacTavish/Reader

Rating: 18+

This was heavily inspired by this lovely ghost/reader camgirl fic, so I decided to throw my hat in the ring. I wrote this in two hours with no editing 🥴

You’re a sweet thing, honeysuckle, ambrosia. The kind of sweet that lingers in your mouth and leaves an aftertaste. He guesses that’s why he returns to your stream every day—like honey, and just as sticky. 

Johnny’s bored one day, absentmindedly palming his boxers as he browses for a good video. Not one to be picky, but something about today has him particularly on edge, not quite able to find his release. His usuals just aren’t doing it.

Then he finds an ad for a cam site and sees you on the front page. 

You catch his eye immediately, wondering what a cute lass like you is doing on a site like this. The link takes him to your stream and his cock hardens in his boxers, not quite believing what his eyes see.

You’re a dream in a pair of soft pink panties, the kind of girl he’d never believe would be working as a cam girl unless he saw it for himself. Legs spread, bright pink vibrator buzzing between your legs, nearly in tears as your back arches off the bed. A hoard of men throwing donations at the screen, hoping for your attention.

He watches for a while more, impossibly hard as your legs shake around the toy, writhing in pleasure. In the corner of the screen he sees a message that makes him throb in his hand.

Valentines special! Top donator of the day gets to hear me moan their name! <3

Thank fucking Christ he had his card number memorized.

Within a day he became your top donator, the emptiness of his wallet meaning nothing when it meant he got to see you spread open on camera, rubbing at your pretty cunt while moaning his name, shaking your hips and displaying your wet pussy for him to see.

“Johnny, Johnny—oh god—“

You sound like heaven in his ears, memorizing each and every sound you make when your fingers find your clit and rub. His hand matches your pace, thumb pressing against his leaking slit and nearly drooling when you grind yourself against your hand with his name on your lips.

You’re beautiful like this, makes him wish he could actually touch you. His cock twitches at the thought, groaning when he reaches down and plays with his balls in tandem.

A day to remember, he swears he’s never come that hard before. His head falls back, not giving a damn if his neighbors hear how loud he moans your name when his cum splashes on his stomach. It drips from his fingers, the slick of it echoing in the room as he vigorously strokes himself through his orgasm. His arm burns with exhaustion, the head of his cock blooming red, so sensitive it becomes damn near painful and yet he doesn’t stop, not until he sees your pretty cunt gush over your fingers. 

You make a mess of yourself, and so does Johnny. The cycle repeats the next day, when he returns for another session. This becomes a regular habit. 

You’re a constant in his life, the moment you go live he’s always the first to join. His pretty bird, his girl. There’s a possessiveness that seeps into every message he sends, lighting up when you read each one and get flustered at the sight. He can tell you’ve never been treated how you aught to be, can see it in the way your legs squeeze together with every donation. 

So he sends you a private message after a month, anxious for your response.

How much for a private session?

And when you give him a price, he’s over the fucking moon. The amount didn’t matter to him, just as long as he got to see you.

Truly a shame he thinks, his little bird going so long without a real man to take care of you. But it’s okay, because now he can lavish you with the attention you’ve needed for so long.

You seem so shy in private, so demure. He knows better of course, has an entire folder on his laptop of you being anything but a fucking angel, but it still shocks him how innocent you seem.

Hands adjusting your outfit, every detail fiddled with until it’s perfect, until you’re satisfied with how your lace fits on your body. A strap here, a crease there. He admires how well you get dolled up for him.

A message flashes on the screen, fifty dollars lighting up. Your eyes light up at the notification, looking over at the bold letters with a smile.

You look so hot today

Your laughter sounds as sweet as you look. “Thank you! I just bought this set.”

You press your tits closer, presenting them to the camera. “Bought it for you, actually. Do you think it looks nice?”

A siren call, he can’t help but be drawn to the view. Johnny licks his lips at the sight, the ambient light casting a soft glow on your exposed cleavage. It makes him want a closer look.

His fingers move quick as anything, not even looking at the screen, completely focused on your body.

$150: you look more than nice lass. let’s see some more.

Familiarity lights up on your features, groaning at the sight of that subtle little grin spreading across your face.

“Of course Johnny,” you whisper, the sound of his name like a melody between your lips. You adjust your camera closer, grabbing at your breasts. “Is this what you wanted?”

No, what he wants is to replace your hands with his own. What he wants is to bite at the supple flesh with his teeth and rip off the flimsy fabric that hides you away from him. 

His hand strokes against the bulge that grows in his boxers as he sends another donation.

$150: you don’t want to know what I want lass.

He loves the look in your eyes, how your pupils dilate when they read it over once, twice. Your lips caught between your teeth, you pull at your nipple through the fabric as you sigh in relief.

“Always a smooth talker…” you whisper.

He watches you from lidded eyes—makes him wonder how you got to this profession, knowing that some dirty talk is enough to have you squirming on camera.

Imagine if he was actually in the room with you, the things he’d say. The things he’d do.

The thought leaves him breathless. One day he’ll have you all to himself, but for now, he’ll settle for a screen.

[authoreetea]

two birds

sullys x sully f!reader

summary : two birds by regina inspired this so bad, lo'ak is your twin brother and you were his world but instead of neteyam, it was you.

warning: ANGST, lo'ak being so sad and desperate.

note: avatar has made me so depressed istg every time i remember nete dying i SOB. THEN I REMEMBER THIS SONG AND I SOB EVEN MORE. i used to think people lie when they say they cried while writing something they made BUT NOW IK ITS REAL CAUSE I'M SOBBING 😭

sullys stick together. that was the shared motto of the sully family and you all lived by it.

you and your siblings were close but you and lo'ak are closer, probably comes with sharing a womb together.

neteyam was like your mentor, he was always there ready to help you with anything. while kiri wss your confidant.

jake always thought you were a miracle child, being so different compared to nete and of course, your twin brother. you were his princess

lo'ak adores you, he was always so over protective of you and as were you. usually lo'ak does the rash and impulsive decisions while you kept him on his feet to think rationally

yet right now, you were the one making rash decisions.

as you stood on the ship that was filled with sky people, lo'ak had dragged you three into saving spider, after you guys grabbed some guns for protection.

once you guys have finally retrieved the human boy, you sighed in relief thinking all would go well but quite the opposite happened.

you were steps ahead of neteyam and you saw someone about to shoot him by his neck, and you didn't spare any time to think when you yelled

"nete! look out" you yelled as loud as you could, and jumped in his way. you felt the impact of the bullet hitting right above your heart, it took the air out of you as you and your big brother jumped down to the water with everyone else.

"y/n/n! you're bleeding, why in eywa's name did you do that!" neteyam was panicking, trying to put pressure on your wound as you bleed out, painting his hands crimson.

you coughed out, "i couldn't let them hit you, nete." your breathing became shallow and your pulse slowing.

you see lo'ak was already crying as he went to carry you to the rock nearest. "dad! help, they shot y/n. please come help" lo'ak cried for help, his voice was shaking and he was scared for his life.

he can't lose you, you were his best friend. you were two peas in a pod. two birds on a wire.

you smile at him. "oh lo'ak, i'm so proud of you, tsmukan (brother)." you said, your voice hoarse.

this just made his eyes tear up more, he was crying a waterfall at this point. "y/n please. you can't do this to me. to us." he pleaded with you as he noticed you were getting drowsy

neytiri and jake got to where you were and the yell your mother let out made you wanna reverse everything. "no, no no, y/n. stay with us, princess." jake whispered, his eyes blurring with tears as he looked at your form.

neytiri rested you on her lap as she cried and prayed to eywa.

"everything's gonna be fine. i love you guys." you whispered, your eyes getting tired and starting to close.

lo'ak yelled no and tuk and kiri were sobbing by your side. tsireya was crying, she finally had a new friend and she was gonna lose you.

"come on y/n! you can make it, please you can't leave me. who will stop me from my stupid decisions if you're gone? my tsmuke." lo'ak cried, his head on your chest and he hated how he could hear your breathing slowing and your heartbeat decreasing.

you smile, looking around at everyone. memorizing their faces as you knew this was it.

"i'm sorry brother, i am tired. but i do not regret doing this at all. sullys stick together." you said, looking at lo'ak and brushed your fingers through his hair.

lo'ak cried into you as he felt your last breath. looking up at your face, he saw you have closed your eyes and he yelled.

neytiri kissed your forehead and sobbed as well, jake rubbing her back to comfort her.

jake was trying to keep a strong face for his family but his own waterfall of tears betray him.

he caresses your lifeless face and his tears fall. he whispers, "i'm sorry baby girl. rest now."

"oh dear eywa, why do you do this to me." neytiri cried out loud. she was tired, she had lost so many and now you.

everyone was mourning as they lost you

no room will ever shine as bright as it did when you walked in. no place will be ever as joyful without you.

lo'ak felt as though he just lost half his soul, and he hated the feeling. the empty feeling as his heart just keeps dropping.

tsireya tried her best to comfort him but she herself was bawling.

this was really it. they hated it but they knew they'd had to live with it.

[callmemaeverick]

Haven [Dream of the Endless x Reader]

A/N: I know I posted about something I wanted to write. But I decided to KIV that fic for now. Instead, I got inspired for this. This fic is too long so I separated it. It could be a two-parter, or multi-chap. IDK yet. Supposed to be GN!reader, but do let me know if there’s something overly descriptive.

Summary: You had never truly found a place you belong in. Your only escape were into the stories you watched, read or wrote. Then one day, you found yourself in a library, with a completed book of your unfinished story.  Words: 936 ~ All your life, you never truly fit anywhere. Sure, you had a lot of friends growing up. You were able to adapt your personality to meet the expectations of many groups of people and interact with them without issue. It has helped you in school and it has helped you as an adult.

But still, you have never felt truly at home.

The closest you have felt to absolute peace and safety, was when you are engrossed in a story, whether it be from watching the telly, reading a book or writing it out yourself.

It was the way you would escape when the crippling loneliness of your life got too much for you. Some of your family members would tut about and chide you, saying that you had your head in the clouds too much. They did not know it was the only way to keep you sane.

xxxx

You didn't know how you got there, but the library was exquisite. Shelves upon shelves of books as far as your eye could see. There were spiralling staircases going up stories to fit the expansive number of tomes and there were little nooks that housed cubbies and comfy chairs for one to sit and read.

It was quiet and empty and there were birds chirping at the windows. You took a deep, deep breath, letting the smell of paper and leather, of wood and the crackling fire fill you up to the brim.

It felt like home, you thought.

Smiling to yourself, you wandered about, fingers trailing worn out spines while you peruse titles. Some of them were familiar, some were utterly foreign. You were not really focusing on what you were looking for, until a leather-bound book caught your eye.

There was no title, but the authors name gave you halt. You frowned as you flipped the book open and read its contents.

The more you read, the more it did and didn't make sense. You knew these characters, knew this world depicted in the pages. The writing style was so unique, so familiar, it could have only been from your own fingers. But you did not remember writing it so... completely.

"You should not be here."

You jumped almost a foot in the air at the sound of that voice, the book in your hand flying.

The... man that stood before you was... different, you knew instantly. It may be his pallor, white as a sheet of paper, or it might be his wild unruly, raven black hair. But for sure, it was the hypnotic way his irises danced in the warm lighting of the library, like the cosmos filled with billions of galaxies.

Alarm bells began ringing in your head.

"Wh- What do you mean?"

The man, being, stepped forward and you instinctively stepped back. He seemed powerful. And worse, he seemed upset at seeing you.

"How did you get here?"

"I- uhm- I ..." You frowned when your mind came up blank as you try to recall your past. The furthest you remember was being in the library, surrounded by books. You turned to him, panic rising in your chest. "I don’t... I don't know. I can't remember. Why can't I remember?"

Hands on your shoulders felt grounding as your companion tried for your attention. "Be calm," He called your name. How he knew it escaped you. "You are dreaming."

You shrugged him off. "What are you talking about? What is going on here? Why is-" you bent down to pick up the book. Your book. "Why does this book exist? I never wanted to publish it. Hell, I hadn't even finished it."

The man froze when he heard you. "Wait, you've read it? You were able to read that?"

"What? Of course, I could read it! What I want to know was how is it finished? Because I never did."

He looked at you for a long time, staring at you as if he could see into your very soul. And then, he introduced himself.

When he told you his name, you had very well laughed in his face. Until you saw that he was entirely serious. Then, he told you about the library and where exactly it was, where you were.

"Oh, come on now. This has gone too far." You cut him off. "I’m willing to call you Morpheus. Maybe your parents had a thing for Greek mythology or the Matrix or something. But you can't expect me to believe that this place is a Dream plane and I just happened to unknowingly cross through an invisible threshold."

"Then how do you explain your inability to recall how you arrived here?" He challenged. "Or how your book, one that you had not yet finished, nor intend to  publish, came to be in my library."

"I- But that's- that's impossible. There is no way that-"

You gasped awake in your bed, the force of your inhale pulling up upright. The room was dark save for the light of your candle warmer. Your room was exactly as you left it before you went to bed, except for the now familiar tall and dark figure in the corner of your room.

"Holy sh-"

You scrambled up onto your bed, in an attempt to put as much distance between you and the Lord of Dreams. As much distance as there was in your small room.

"You're real."

Dream stepped closer, to the edge of your mattress, hands in his pockets. "I am."

You sighed, running a hand through your hair. "What is going on?"

"That is what I intend to find out.” ~ [Part 2]

[creepypastasomethingsomething]

CreepyPasta Incorrect Quotes Pt. 8

Zalgo: I made tea

The Slender Man: I don't want tea

Zalgo: I did not make the tea for you, idiot. This is my tea

The Slender Man: Then why are you telling me?

Zalgo: It's a conversation starter

The Slender Man: That's a lousy conversation starter

Zalgo: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.

---

(Y/N): How petty can you get?

BEN: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about

---

Jason the Toymaker: Have you seen a person named 'Kagekao' around here?

Liu: Ugh, yes. He made a horrible mess of the blood fountain.

Bloody Painter: It looks fine to me?

Liu: IT USED TO BE WATER!!??

---

(Y/N), in the house Sally haunts: I'm going to lock myself in here with the ghosts

---

Jeff: Lui, what if there are monsters?

Lui: Don’t worry, we’re top of the food chain.

[Later]

Jeff, lying awake at night: I am the monster

---

Masky: ...I'm pretty sure that place is fire-proof, or something.

Toby, grenade in hand: Alright, but is it explosion-proof?

---

Lui: You kidnapped (Y/N)? That's illegal!

Clockwork: But Lui, what's more illegal? Briefly inconveniencing (Y/N) or destroying our dreams?

Lui: Kidnapping (Y/N), Natalie!!!

Kate: Lui, listen, whatever I may think of you right now- these guys are counting on you to inspire them!

Lui: What, to kidnap people?!

Clockwork: To work together!

Lui: TO KIDNAP PEOPLE?!?!?!

Jane: Lui, we all agreed a celebrity is a not a people.

---

Hobo Heart: What if people had food names and food had people names?

Jason the toymaker: Hey, spaghetti, we're having Helen for dinner.

Bloody Painter: What is wrong with you people?

Kagekao: Shut up, chocolate.

---

Nurse Ann, to the squad: And remember, if I get harsh with you it is only because you're doing it all wrong.

---

*The squad's reaction to being told they're the chosen one*

(Y/N): I will not let you down.

Jame: Sounds fun.

Hobo Heart: K.

E.J: No, I'm fucking not.

Dr. Smiley: Do I have to be?

Lui: Please god, I am so tired.

---

The Puppetteer: Hey, did you know as a kid I accidentally ate paper?

Bloody Panter: I feel like we've all done that at least once

Judge Angels: I ate it too-

Bloody Panter: See?

Judge Angels: -On purpose

The Puppetteer & Bloody Panter: ...What?

---

BEN: Physically, yes, I could fight a bird. But emotionally? Imagine the toll.

---

Toby: People are always asking me if I'm a morning person or a night person

Toby: And I'm just like, 'Buddy! I'm barely even a PERSON!'

---

Lui: Would you like something to drink? *opens fridge* We have water, milk, juice, spiders, Dr. Pepper-

Jeff: Spiders?

Lui: Spiders it is then.

Zalgo: No, that wasn't-

*Lui then pours Jeff a brimming glass of spiders*

---

Hairdresser: How would you like your hair cut?

(Y/N): Preferably with scissors, but a sword could be badass.

[blythebewitched]

Eyes Like Starlight: Smiling Critters Oneshot

Tales From The Playcare AU:

While scavenging, Bubba and Kickin find a skylight above the Playcare. Its the first time they see the real night sky . . .

Kickin Chicken always wanted to go outside for as long as he could remember. Out of everything, there was nothing he wanted to see more than the stars his personality was inspired off of.

Just above, HIGH above the Playcare, there it was. A skylight. It was round and covered a bit by old vines around the outside. But you could still see through it.

He and Bubba stood there. Silent. Staring up. Kickin could count at least 30 stars. It was literally breathtaking as his breath caught in his chest. It was the most amazing thing he'd ever seen.

"Are you coming? . . . Kickin?"

The Chicken swung his head to face his friend. He hadn't noticed Bubba was looking at him. Normally the thought of his crush staring at him would fluster him. But the view took his attention.

"C'mon. We have a job to do remember? "

"Isn't that the most beautiful and amazing thing you've ever seen!? The REAL night sky! Its right there! You're just gonna walk away and act like this isn't MONUMENTAL!?"

"Eh . . . Not really. I'm not impressed."

Kickin stopped dead in his tracks. Eyes wide and mouth agap.

"You're NOT impressed? . . . HOW ARE YOU NOT IMPRESSED!!!???" The words ricochetted off the walls. Bubba having to quickly shush him.

"Are you out of your mind? There's monsters nearby!"

*whispers* "how are you not impressed???"

Bubba squeezed the bridge of his trunk under his glasses and let out a sigh. "If I wanted to see pretty white lights I would've just looked at YOU. Your eyes are the same thing. Now let's go".

He started walking towards the ladder to go back down to the Playcare. Kicken was being oddly silent so he turned around. A little annoyed the idiot wasn't following. He caught sight of Kickin standing perfectly still as expected, but UNEXPECTEDLY he was wide eyed and red faced.

"Kickin? . . . Are you . . . Alright?" He walked back a few feet. He took notice the Kickin was avoiding his gaze. When he got close enough, Kickin's eyes became heavy lidded.

"You . . . You're unimpressed cause you think my eyes look like the stars? . . ." Kickin finally looked up at Bubba. To his dismay, it was with those big puppy dog eyes Bubba could never hate or say no to. Those eyes gave him the hint he needed to realize what he just did.

"THAT WASN'T A COMPLIMENT!!!" Bubba cursed himself for being the loud one now. "I ONLY MEANT IT FACTUALLY! You are literally the STAR character! It shouldn't be surprising that SOMETHING about you would be modeled off the real stars!"

Bubba didn't think it was possible, but Kickin's eyes got BIGGER. A little smile appeared and his blush got deeper. The fact that Kickin was flattered caused Bubba's face to fluster in return.

"It's okay to compliment me y'know." The smile turned into a sly smirk. "I promise I won't think any less than you . . . Lemondrop" . Kickin knew there was NOTHING Bubba hated being called more than Lemondrop.

He had a huge crush on Bubba Bubbaphant since they had met. When Kickin called him that pet name for the first time, he realized just how bad Bubba was at . . . Emotions. Since then, he found it funny and endearing about his favorite elephant.

Kickin was lifted off his feet and pinned against the wall. He couldn't help but cackle at this reaction he'd gotten used to by now.

"NEVER. CALL. ME. LEMONDROP!!! NEVER. EVER!!!" Bubba's face turned red. It PISSED him off whenever Kickin tried to play with the emotions he tried to keep under lock and key.

Bubba angrily slung the bird over his shoulder causing him to burst out laughing. He began to walk back towards the Playcare planning on ignoring the idiot on his shoulder. But Kickin wrapped his arms around his neck. He placed the slightest peck on Bubba's head.

"Thanks Bubby. I think that was the nicest thing you've ever said to me . . . You're my best friend. 💛"

Bubba looked down at his feet as he walked with his crush . . . His favorite person in his arms. He tried his hardest to hide his smile despite being irritated by the pet name.

"You're . . . My best friend too. But Sweet Prototype you get on my nerves."

Both of them laughed as they reached the entrance of the Playcare. Secretly, in that moment, both wanted nothing more than to tell each other what they really felt. But, too nervous to do so, they left it for another day. For now, it was good enough for Bubba to be his best friend . . . And for Kickin, it was good enough to know his eyes reminded him of starlight.

[thebeatles-world]

Free Bird: Part 2

Here's part one

''Wait, Geo please wait...'' You shouted as you ran. You saw George unlocking his car.

''I need to tell you something!!!'' You shouted at the top of your lungs. It drew George's attention to you.

"Listen, I'm not trying to cause trouble." My words ought to have remained silent.'' George begin before you interrupted him.

George, no. You've always been the one.. You have always been my first love and I have loved you unconditionally. I will always remember you. I adore you and you alone. I have always loved you and you alone, therefore I will quickly bring you back if need be."" You said, telling him how you really feel.

"Please don't say that, Y/N." George whispered, his eyes gullible.

"George, you understand that this is the reality… Just be honest, please.'' you pleaded.

"I swear, I didn't mean to ruin your marriage," George exclaimed.

I have never loved the person who proposed to me. Geo, I've always loved you. I have always," you replied.

You went on, "Can't you see that?" I have loved you and will always love you.''

George kissed you on the lips and remarked, "I always had feelings for you too, Y/N."

You returned the kiss. "George, I've always loved you."

''Get in my car, quick, before the fangirls arrive,'' George urged.

You nodded and climbed into George's vehicle. George sped off.

While George was driving, you remained silent. He appeared to be driving far away.

You were shocked to learn that you had canceled your wedding to be with George.

You felt no regret at all.

George drove for an extensive length of time before coming to a beautiful beach.

As you gazed at the shore, you said to George, "Oh, this is beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you love." George told you.

You blushed.

You and George both exit out of the car.

You grabbed George's hand.

George grasped your hand back.

''You know what, it feels good to not have any fans." George said to you.

''Yeah, it does seem that way.'' You agreed.

George and you kept strolling hand in hand along the beach.

George and you both had similar experiences when you two dated different people. Since he and Pattie lost feelings for each other, they drifted apart. When George and Pattie broke up, you were there for him.

When you caught your partner cheating on you with a woman named Wanda, George was there for you. After finding out, you spend the night at George's place, while your fiancé thought you were spending the night at your best friend's house. When you cried to George about this, he comforted you and held you in his arms.

George was the sweetest guy you ever met plus dated in the past. The fact that you two remain friends despite the split was nice to know, even if it was on and off due to Pattie and your fiancé, who didn't seem to be comfortable with you two having remained friends.

You and George continued to walk along the beach listening to the seagulls and waves.

''Hey Y/N? Though I hadn't planned on this happening, I always imagine this moment sometimes…'' George suddenly said. You were given a kiss on the forehead as he stopped in his tracks.

''Yes, Geo?' You asked as you looked into his beautiful brown eyes with a smile on your face.

''This is something I have always wanted to do. When I first fell in love with you, I knew I was in love with you forever. You were the first girl I ever felt passionate about. Having you in my life made everything better. You inspire me to be a better person. The only thing I could think about when we broke up was that I would lose you forever and this time I'll make sure that I don't lose you forever. I'll make sure of it.'' George said as tears began to spring to his eyes.

''George, I'm still here silly. I won't go anywhere.'' You giggled a bit as you wipe his tears away.

''Like what I mean is, I'm still here in your life and I already know how you feel about me George. I feel the same way about you.'' You smiled softly at him.

Listen… darling… what I am trying to say is…'' George got down on one knee in front of you and pulled out the most beautiful diamond ring you had ever seen. "Y/N L/N Will you be my wife? Will you marry me?" George asked.

You looked around the beach in shock and then back at George. You nodded, tears of joy streaming down your face. George put the ring on your finger, and you two embraced in a passionate kiss.

''While I know it was a bad thing for me to propose to you after you left your wedding and ex-husband, I just couldn't wait any longer. My heart belonged to you. George mumbled through the kiss you shared. You and George were kissing nonstop.

''George, stop talking. I've always loved you. "You are my heart," you whispered as your lips brushed against his.

''I promise to never let you go my dear.'' George said as he picked you up and spun you around. "I am so glad I finally have you baby, and I cannot wait to become Mrs. Harrison.".

You and George could feel the joy and love in the air, and you two knew that this was meant to be. You and George were meant to be together. You both vowed to stay together through thick and thin, no matter what life threw your way.

As soon as you and George became husband and wife, you guys promised that the two of you would love each other and cherish every moment together.

[askfuzzycallie]

Welcome to askfuzzycallie!

This is a splatoon au ask blog! I'm your humble host, @possiblycringe! I hope you enjoy my silly little au :D This blog will have a overarching story told over time. Most asks will not progress the plot, but Callies behavior and the status quo will change, usually during the course of longer answers or non ask comics. If you are just arriving, I recommend reading through the asks in chronological order. <- Chrono Tag Also, this is a horror au, or at least an au that contains horror in it. There is going to be psychological horror, body horror, and other unpleasant stuff. These aspects will become more apparent later on in the story, though. Just be aware of that! ______________________________________________________________ Our cast! Captain 3 (Carp)

-The quiet captain of the NSS. She can face down a horde of enemy octarians but when faced with a slightly uncomfortable conversation she will bolt. -Carp is also partially Octarian -(SPOILERS) Carp has been on the sidelines this whole time, but with Callie feral will she step into action? She seems uncomfortable to even talk about it... Agent 3 (Peashooter) and Lil Buddy (Pod)

-The short-tempered, half-fuzzified kid who, for some reason, was recruited by Craig. He seems to not trust easily, but those who gain his trust, such as Craig and Pod, are people he will die for without question. Despite Pod eating the fuzzy ooze just before it transformed him, he doesn't remember anything about his old life, and wants to keep it that way. -(SPOILERS) It seems that Pea has reason not to want to remember his former life, as he had a past similar to the squid sisters...except he was forced into fame at a much younger age, leading to neglect and a belief that genuine joy is simply a facade that he is above -(SPOILERS) In the past, Pea, or as his name used to be, Crumb, had a collaboration with the squid sisters, where Callie comforted him after he tried to run away from set. This memory has inspired a new courage in Pea, who seems to have changed his view on the world just a little Agent 1 (Callie Cuttlefish)

-The cheery premier agent of the NSS and the former pop star, Callie has been enjoying life after her incident with the hypnoshades. Unfortunately, the fuzzy ooze might disrupt that...but she doesn’t seemed very bothered by the changes! -(SPOILERS) The symptoms have progressed. Callie is now hunting birds without Marie's knowledge -(SPOILERS) Callie has been convinced by Mr. Grizz to hide her worsening symptoms from Marie. This could be a bad sign -(SPOILERS) Callie has become aggressive towards Deep Cut, now attacking them without hesitation. Memories have also begun to degrade -(SPOILERS) Callie has attempted to kill and eat Big Man, and this whole time has been eating salmonoids, some of which used to be her friends. Has she fully lost herself? She has separated away from the NSS, permanently for now Agent 2 (Marie Cuttlefish)

-The sassy half of the Squid Sisters and second agent of the NSS, Marie has one of the strongest wills in the Splatoon. She's wary of Callie's new quirks, but is trying not to let them drift apart again. -(SPOILERS) Marie's worst fears have been realized: Callie has been lying to her this entire time. Now she's who-knows-where. She will need to find the inner strength to keep going and rescue her cousin. Again. I have other agents and feel free to ask about them, but they will likely not make a huge impact on the story! ______________________________________________________________ General rules and guidelines: -No NSFW related asks, please -OOC asks are okay, if you want any clarification on the au! -You can clarify who you are asking or leave it up to me to decide who answers -No ships are planned for this, there are some I am considering but I might not include them as I am not the strongest with romance (Edit: There is one minor romantic subplot planned because I was enabled by a friend. Have fun with that!) -I'm pretty bad with fancy formatting, so I will probably not have that much fancy texts -M!Anons aren't allowed. I'm pretty new with askblogs so I want to wait a bit until I'm more comfortable to let M!Anons happen. EDIT: No M!A will be allowed until the main story is completed

-As established in this ask, the context for asks is that an ancient human AI was found in alterna. You are free to send asks to any character in alterna because of this, but please keep this lore in mind! -No interaction with other roleplay blogs, please. This is a self contained story and because of the reasoning given above, other roleplay blogs sending asks wouldn't make sense. Thank you for understanding! -Non-OOC Asks will generally be answered with 1-5 sketches, might add splashes of color if needed ______________________________________________________________

Tags: [Ask] - any asks, in character or not [OOC] - any OOC asks [Fuzzy Callie] - any in character asks or events relating to the overall story ______________________________________________________________ Ending things off, I have never run an ask blog before so please forgive me for any mistakes I make! Thank you :D

[randonauticrap]

A Letter to Myself ~ Chapter 1

Series Description: A 1st person POV Isekai Ikemen Prince adventure told by me, your narrator. Not all true stories are believable, and not all true stories are real. I have changed my name and the names of anyone who inspired these characters.

Chapter Description: Liliana goes to sleep after another disappointing experience with love, and wakes up inside a very strange dream.

Chapter Title: Dream Truths

Triggers: Negative self talk; vague mention of fatphobia

There are few things in this world I love more than singing, sleeping, and daydreaming. They’re the three things that can always reset my anxious mind, and push out all forms of mental clutter, if only long enough for me to focus on the task at hand. That particular evening, the task at hand was wishing that my situationship (who, after I admitted I had feelings for earlier that day, told me he didn’t actually feel that way about me, and saw me only as a friend) had instead been one of the dashing princes in my favorite otome game. I think everyone could agree that they would never. But the quiet of the night threatened to envelop me nonetheless; this wasn’t the first time I’ve been fooled by pretty words and flirtatious kindness. It wasn’t even the second or third, and I’ve begun to wonder who the real problem is. Am I simply misinterpreting this behavior? Was my perception truly that terrible? I didn’t think so, since I could usually nail down just about anyone I met: what their struggles were, why they acted the way they did, and so on and so forth. In fact, it was one of the things I was known for in my friend circles - being a mind reader. 

But for some reason, when love was involved, my radar was off; or broken; or just flat out missing altogether. It was something I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember; to be loved the way I love, but fate seemed to stand against me in that regard. What if I just wasn't meant to have my own love story? My heart clenched at the thought that plagued me over and over. It was no mystery that my body type was not one that was so popularly celebrated in many circles, and I'd experienced my fair share of backlash over it through the years. And while, thankfully, many women in this day and age were standing up and speaking out about it, I still received far too many judgmental eyes on me when I dared to eat in public; didn't matter if it was 4pm and it was the first thing I'd eaten since I woke up at 7am. 

So it should come as no surprise that the little voice in my head - that damn goblin - often added "overweight" to the list of qualities that left men… wanting, in regards to myself. But the laundry list was miles long by now, and not even the newest Whirlpool could scrub it clean. Besides, who could afford that much laundry detergent? Certainly not me. Not in this economy. 

Usually, I could stir up some comforting scenario with the handsome first prince and lull myself to sleep in his imaginary arms, but the trick wasn't working tonight. God, of course it wasn't. I had to be up in around 4 hours to go to rehearsal, and sleep had been evading me almost as much as men did. "Is sleep a man?" I pondered aloud to my quiet bedroom. "Would make a hell of a lot of sense." I grumbled under my breath as I reached for the Melatonin gummies on my nightstand. I popped two in my mouth and chewed begrudgingly until the almost-fruit tang flavor was gone from my mouth, then let my head fall unceremoniously back onto my pillow with a dull thud. 

Now my neck hurts. Of course it does.

I tossed and turned for awhile longer, praying the Melatonin would do its work, and at last, I felt the gentle tug of sleep calling the deep recesses of my brain. Thank God, now I can go see Jin. It was the last coherent thought I had before diving under, my subconscious brain taking over, my desires in tow. 

…

…..

…….

Birds. 

I was hearing birds. Is this a dream? Those birds don't sound like the birds outside my window normally do. Those sound like… what the hell is that? A weed wacker? It isn't Friday. Is it? This has to be a dream, there's no way I missed two days; I've slept for long periods of time, but never 48 hours straight, long. That's like, coma long. God, I hope I haven't peed the bed. 

I cracked one eye open slowly, noting the lack of crust around it. Thank God, I'm finally re-hydrated. I'd been dehydrated for pretty much my entire life, through no one's fault but my own, and I'd always wanted to be one of those girls who could tote around a cute water bottle the size of a milk jug and drink it all in one day. But alas, God had other plans when he made me. Maybe he was distracted, I don't know. But I had been trying to take better care of myself lately, so I guess it finally paid off! Hopefully this means no more headaches, and-

I opened my other eye to stare up at my ceiling. I wonder what ti- wait. "M'kaaaay, maybe I do have eye crust." I mumbled, rubbing my eyes with my index fingers. Cause that's not my ceiling. Have I gone blind? Oh God, am I blind?

I opened my eyes again and flicked my gaze around the room quickly. Okay, not blind. A relieved sigh petered out of my lungs, but it only lasted a second before I cast my eyes around the room again, in earnest this time. This is not my room. My head swiveled left; right; left again. Okay, so I'm dreaming. Damn it, I probably still have eye crust. I shook my head in disappointment as I sat up in bed. The room I was in was small; tiny, even in comparison to mine, which was saying something. There was a single painting on the wall perpendicular to my right, hung precariously on the dusty beige wall. It looked like a lush green forest with a river running through the center. Pretty. 

My eyes continued their journey right and landed on a small, rustic looking side table with an oil lamp on it, along with a well-worn book. On impulse, I picked up the book and stroked its spine while I read the words on the cover. "Liliana's Adventures" Funny. That's my name. Could my brain really not come up with anything better than this for a title? Jeez, and I call myself a writer. A sound between a scoff and a laugh escaped my lips as I set the book back down on the side table and turned my head to the left. 

There was a small table with two rickety wooden chairs and what looked like a sewing project neatly folded on the tabletop. Okay, is my brain trying to tell me to pick up a new hobby or something, or did I watch too much Lord of the Rings last night? I noticed that there was a simple mirror on the wall across from me that reflected the bland beige wall above my head, the door to the tiny room, and a single window, notched in the downward slope of the ceiling to my left. I didn't understand. Why did my subconscious bring me here of all places? And where even is here? I mean, it has to be a dream. I just "woke up" and the inside of my mouth doesn't even feel gross, and there's no way that's real. 

I pulled myself out of the small, stiff bed and padded over to the window, my feet bare on the chilly wooden panels. The most beautiful garden I had ever seen in my life sprawled out before my eyes way down below. Bursts of yellow, white, pink, and red lined a maze of pathways through the middle, and showcased the gorgeous flowers in bloom. Most of them looked like roses. Wow… now I understand the weed wacker. 

I could get lost tracing each walkway with my eyes, and apparently I did, because I didn't hear the angry footsteps stomping up to the door of my room until it burst open and an irate woman screeched through it. "Leisel, quit your dawdling, we are due in the kitchen in five minutes!" The door slammed shut just as suddenly as it had opened and I jumped hard, nearly knocking my head on the sloped ceiling in the process.  "Who the hell is Leisel?"

~

Tags for the Lovelies: @aquagirl1978 @rhodolitesroseforclavis @ikehoe @queengiuliettafirstlady @maries-gallery @nightghoul381 @judejazza @xbalayage @kissmetwicekissmedeadly @alvieeru @aria-chikage @tele86

[myers-meadow]

Otis B. Driftwood x fem OC: 🌺 A muse for him and him alone 💟

Title: A muse for him and him alone (chapter 1)

Warnings: (mild) gore, rape/non-con, dub-con, captivity, necrophilia, mentions of torture.

Summary: Even the Devil himself has art block sometimes... In the fresh group of victims that comes to the house, Otis discovers a muse. Inspiration and amusement drive him to keep her around, and both grow attached. With complex feelings keeping her alive, she must find a way to ensure her survival in the household, even if she gets in the way of what the family considers as their normal.

Word count: 2137

This is a very 'Meadow'-esque exploration of what it would be like to be kept by Otis as a victim and a muse. It follows a theatre-like akte structure, and is overall somewhat fragmented, as dairies can often be. In this fic I allow myself to be entirely myself and go as dark, as soft, and as intimate as I want. This will have multiple parts, a lot of it is planned out, but I will take my time and enjoy the process.

Please enjoy! Don't forget to let me know if you did! <3

Dividers by delishlydelightfuldividers

AKTE 0: “Ich will Frei sein – richtig Frei sein!“

The road was long, never-ending, the heat almost bearable with the windows down, stray hairs catching in my lipstick at the corners of my mouth, singing along to those songs about freedom on the cd we brought from home, complaining about the mediocre gas station food. Andra, Jip and me squished in the backseat; Christoff and Bram in the front, doing their best to ignore the off-key singing from behind them, focussing on road and directions. This trip was so unplanned it was ridiculous, yet each of us joined with that enthusiasm of feeling like the summer laid in wait at our feet. We slept in joined beds or when one of us couldn’t stand it anymore, they took the car, stayed up too late to see the stars, to see so far across the plains, to hear different birds from those we have at home. To feel the coldness of the night set in, the dew waiting on the grass when first light woke us since each motel room had those shitty thin curtains, and telling ourselves we’d nap in the car. I’m sure Bram had a friend of a friend he was meeting at our destination, and Christoff and Jip were mending their messy relationship, but I was there for Andra. I hoped that if we spent these two weeks together, that her friendly touches would grow to linger. That I’d know for sure that she’d taste like cigarettes and toothpaste, that I’d not have to ask Jip to rub sunscreen on my shoulders again, that the ride would be full of stolen touches and pretending we didn’t notice the others staring.

AKTE I: Disbelief

How did we go from singing along to Helge Schneider and daydreaming in the car to this- to being hunted for sport; Andra and me stripped almost nude, tied up and gagged in some disgusting room with faded bloodstains on the floor. It was the big man with the dark hair who took us, but it was a team effort. Bram, Christoff and Jip must be somewhere, taking by the others. There were so many of them – god my head hurt. It throbbed and my vision followed the pulse of my heart. The rag around my head to gag me was tied so poorly I managed it down with ease. Andra, next to me, already awake, was littered with bruises and small cuts, open skin on her knees and forearms from falling and crawling away, panicked eyes staring into mine. And before I could think of what to say, before I could even test the give of the rope binding my arms behind my back, the bear of a guy came back. It was a blur of screaming, dizziness, cursing, and being pulled by my hair as a sharp pain through it all.

“Fuck, the bitch broke my nose!” the bear roared, knocking me to the wall with enough force that the wall itself shook. The door slammed open, and the white haired guy entered. Otis. Why did I remember his name with my head splitting open from the pain? He was angry, but when he saw me already down on the ground (cowering), Andra still tied, fallen over on her chair, and the bear clutching his nose, he burst out laughing.

“Finally met one who bested ya? Serves you right for taking first pick, asshole.” And he easily dodged my attempts to swat at him like a cat and dragged me off by the scruff of my neck.

Otis’ room was in sharp contrast to the rest of the house and I didn’t dare say a word as he strapped me to the wall, and stepped back to admire me, sleazy grin on his face. As he retreated to put on a record, I looked around at the many crude drawings on the walls. On the ceiling too, and in the middle of it was written ‘god won’t help you now’ and I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. It was a laugh like the ones where the roller coaster creeps closer to that tipping point, close to the free fall – but not knowing when it’d come. Maniacal and scary. Some upbeat blues rock perfected the absurdist reality of the situation.

Otis, reappearing, eyebrows raised, said: “You havin’ fun, missy?”

But of course I wasn’t, as much like roller coasters, this was no fun at all. “I didn’t even meant to kick him that hard,” I said, wheezing, trying to catch my breath from laughing. The knife in Otis’ hand glinted as he came closer. Death was a given, but I’d love to have another go at the fighting thing- The door swung open, a girl marched in, voice loud and high-pitched.

“They got away, Otis quick!”

“Goddamnit!” he cursed loudly, slamming the knife right next to my head, the sound of the splintering wood resounding in my head as he grabbed a rifle from behind the opened door. He complained all the while, and I leaned my head back against the wall, sighing with the relief of my demise pushed back.

AKTE II: Art show

Evening fell. When Otis returned, I’d almost fallen asleep. He let me, or made me, depending how you look at it, go to the bathroom. It was no more or less bad than anything else I could imagine to have my last moments on this earth be. There was a song stuck in my head and I hummed it quietly as I washed my hands for as long as Otis let me, before he grabbed me by the arm and dragged me back to his bedroom. Where the big bear of a man favoured rope, Otis preferred chains. Of course they were heavy, of course they were uncomfortable – but did any of that truly matter at the end of a life like this? I remembered family, and all the girls I had just a little too intense of a friendship with, and the many cats I’ve loved and cuddled. It would’ve been nice to have more time. To tell my parents of my travels, of what America is like, of how the people were all so nice.

Otis set me down on his desk chair, wrapping the chain around my chest and the back of the chair. I let my head fall back to watch him as he chatted idly, referencing conversations we shared the night before, when things were still normal, as he sharpened his knife or whatever it was that evil men do.

“You and your friends,” he said, pointing at me, “you sure are a lively bunch. We don’t get ones like you often. I don’t appreciate the noise as much, but you, you’re filling my head with thoughts. Do you have any idea how it is to be cooped up in here all day – no fresh ideas, no thoughts to share, nothing of value to ever come through these parts? But you’ve opened the doors of my mind.”

“So all those things you said about being an artist, about your art, that’s all bullshit?” I asked, moving my legs to try and swing the chair around to face him properly.

“A simple guy like me can’t be an artist? Is that it?” his tone was all venom. He wanted to scare me.

“Yeah, sure, you kill people, everyone can do that, but do you create? Can you create something from the ground up?”

He scoffed, but seemed amused as he leaned himself down to my level, his hands on my underarms – surprisingly warm, but I could practically taste the copper and cigarettes that clung to him. His eyes were even stranger in the low light than they were in the candle light of the dinner the night before.

“Oh, I’ll show you, mama.”

The ‘art’ was behind a curtain, and he pulled it back with a grand gesture, grinning widely. Going behind me, he pushed the chair until it was in front of it. It was a creature, unclear of what it was made of, but it resembled half snake, half human. A long forked tongue past horrifyingly realistic looking lips. The human half was endearingly ugly-looking.

“Wow,” I said, too absorbed in looking at it that the sound of my own voice startled me. I scooted the chair closer with awkward movements to see the detail better. Each scale was painstakingly carved and painted, the colour almost shimmery, just like how real snakeskin looks. “This is amazing. What is this made of? Is that clay?”

Otis stared at me, without words for a second.

“The detail is incredible,” I said, scooting myself another few centimetres closer. “The tongue is a very nice touch. It almost looks like a man captured by a witch, who cursed him after he lied to her. Like something out of a fairy tale. Cursed to reflect the crime committed.”

Otis just laughed but I paid him no mind, too busy staring at the complexity and high level of realism in the artwork.

“I can’t believe you created this – how long did it take you? Must’ve spent entire days on it to get all these details just right.” Admiration, mixed with a healthy measure of disbelief, dripped from my voice. “Each individual scale… You’d almost think it’s a real snake.”

Otis snorted.

I tried to reach out to feel the texture of the body, but was held back by the chains and cursed at the feeling.

“This should be in one of those big museums, selling for millions to those eclectic rich people in ugly suits. To think of a concept like this! The mythological meaning of a snake, and that with a sizable project like this. Do you make things like this regularly? God, it’s beautiful.”

In my head, thoughts swirled around, clashing in opposite directions. How could art this beautiful exist in an unassuming place, so far out in the middle of nowhere? Assuming he had no formal artistic education, and learned by doing, making it all the more impressive. Worse than that; how could a man so deeply evil have created something of such beauty with hands that have taken the lives of my friends?

All thoughts halted when he grabbed me by the neck and planted a wet, open-mouthed kiss on my lips.

AKTE III: Bad moon rising

Night fell, and my fear of death went down with the setting sun. Otis dropped a corpse down on his bed. Where did he even get her? She wasn’t anyone I knew. A small relief.

“It’s time for bed,” he announced with a vile grin. He tied the chain that bound me to the frame of his bed, leash short. I’d have to sleep on the floor. Somehow that wasn’t the worst that happened in the past 24 hours, so I laid my head on my folded arm and closed my eyes to rest. Once I laid still for a couple minutes, a harrowing tiredness set in – yet my thoughts raced. As soon as I felt my consciousness fade, the bed creaked. Grunts accompanied it and I looked up. It was dark, but without question, there was the shape of Otis, mounting the corpse. I stifled my gasp with my hand, eyes wide, lip curled with disgust. He noticed, and laughed, teeth bared in a grin like that of a wolf.

“Ain’t ever seen a guy make sweet love before?” he taunted. “Or would you rather join us? Sure you can, if ya ask nicely.”

The hardness of the cold floor was far preferable. The chains rattled as I shook my head wildly. Pressing my eyes closed, trying to shut it all out, to pretend it wasn’t happening. The noise was worse with my mind filling in the blanks, so I stared up at him again, with disbelieving eyes. How could he get worse, so, so much worse than he already was? What is wrong with this family? And then, at the back of my head: at least it wasn’t me. And, for her: at least she wouldn’t have to live with the trauma of it – although I will, for the both of us. His pleasured grunts and the creaking increased in speed and volume. No words in any language I know of could describe this.

With a final grunt, and then a deep sigh, he came. A cold arm that hit mine made me crawl as far away from the bed as the chain allowed me. Just in time, as Otis rolled the whole body off the bed, thudding down to face me, mangled and twisted with lifelessness. I screamed. Loud and shrill. The first time I did that day. I could barely hear his laughter over the blood rushing in my ears. 

[missathlete31]

Dead on Your Feet Chapter 12- Sneak Peak

It's no secret that I haven't been able to write anything new in months. My mind keeps coming up with ideas but then I try to execute them and it's just painful to reread. I've gotten more inspired lately, especially thanks to some of the amazing people on here who have been so encouraging (looking at you @seresimp!!!!) and I broke through some mental barriers to produce this first part of Chapter 12. Hoping for some feedback to fuel me through!! Thank you to everyone who has stuck with this story for your patience! I hope this sounds a little like the writer I used to be.

Masterlist for anyone that needs to refresh their memories because it's been like six months since I last posted

The ascent towards the helicopter is meant to be the end of this whole nightmare for Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell. His pilots have been found, have already risen to the sanctity of the bird hovering in the sky and now it is only left to him to be pulled to safety before they can all head home. Pete leaves the cold ocean waves ready to feel victorious, to feel as though he finally has succeeded and achieved the final miracle of the day, getting everyone home alive.

But once more he is struck down.

The second Maverick hauls himself into the rescue helicopter, all he recognizes is chaos. Gone is the hushed silence from outside, replaced with the panic-stricken energy of multiple bodies crammed into a tight space and fighting for purchase. Pete’s eyes naturally train on Rooster first, his gaze widening as he sees a young man pulling his Lieutenant back with a harsh grip. Mav moves to intervene, to scream over the hysterical bellowing issuing from Bradshaw’s mouth, and ask what the hell is going on, but before he can Pete gets a clear view of Jake Seresin on the floor of the aircraft, spread eagle and unmoving, as a middle aged Hispanic man pounds heavily on the blonde’s sternum.

Maverick knows logically that the man above Seresin is some sort of doctor, he can tell just from the uniform alone. However doctor or not, the sight of this man pumping harshly on Jake’s chest makes the older pilot need to look away in fear he might intercede. A protectiveness rises within Pete, unwavering in its ferocity at the unnatural sight before him; a bruised and bloody Hangman being pounded into the floor as a means of saving his life.

Because Seresin isn’t breathing.

The grimace from the rescue diver makes a lot more sense now.

Bradley's screams still ring out in the air around them, each one more and more blood curdling. He is being restrained by someone similar in size to the 6 foot Bradshaw and yet Rooster continues to hurl his exhausted and water logged body towards his wingman relentlessly. He roars over all the other noise around them, his temper on full display. It's been over a decade since Maverick has seen it in all its fury but he remembers how the younger Bradshaw can wield his anger like the deadliest sword. His visceral emotions striking like perfect daggers each and every time. Pete knows he needs to control it, to distract Rooster so that the man holding him back can get the rescue swimmer back up and they can make their way back to the ship, but the older pilot is shocked still; his senses all but burnt out at the overwhelming assault of the environment around him.

"Captain" a voice snaps, and Pete turns to see the doctor, the name Sosa stitched onto his chest, still pumping furiously. Maverick can make out the beginnings of a bruise reddening the other man's cheek, no doubt caused from a blow to the face by Bradley's fist before the aviator was properly subdued. "Captain" the man speaks up again, "I need you to control your pilot."

"I-" Maverick gapes helplessly, as though he is being asked to do the impossible; and maybe he is. There might have been a time when he could calm Bradley Bradshaw down with a quick word or a tight hug, when he would snuggle with the little boy who was scared of thunder, or lecture the kid who rode his bike too far down the street. That kid doesn't exist anymore, or perhaps the Maverick that could do all those things is really the one who's gone; either way Pete Mitchell is as helpless to the lashes of Bradley Bradshaw's ire as anyone else.

"Captain" the tone is desperate, exhausted, as still Doctor Sosa thrusts his hands powerfully down on Hangman's chest cavity in an effort to bring life back into the kid's heart. "We need to get that diver up now” he explains, “this Lieutenant needs more help than I can give in this bird, we have to get back to the ship. Now please-" a firmness laces his words, a command coming from a man who knows how this story is going to end unless something changes soon, "control your man."

[wooahaes]

under the sun [day 2.]

pairing: non-idol!svt x gn!reader

prompt: darl+ing inspired fic.

word count: 8.2k~

warnings: food mentions. skinship (straight up cuddling + hand holding + seungcheol gives u a lil (completely platonic) kiss on the head). mentions of hunting animals for food. fire mention (campfire). some italicized lyrics from jihoon singing.

daisy’s notes: ahem. men! also sorry for every fic where i push strawberries into. maybe they shouldn’t be the best fruit if they didn’t want me to project my love of them into my writing.

summary:  It all starts when you wake up in a field without a name or any memories  to define yourself with. When thirteen men take you in as one of their  own, and slowly you begin to wonder what exactly is going on within this  world... and between you and one of them? 

< day 1 || masterlist || day 3 >

When Seungcheol told you that he had places he wanted for you to see, you realized shortly after that he didn’t know how far Chan had gone with his own tour. But he’d asked Joshua to show you around outside of the church, and the guy seemed happy enough to take you under his wing that you decided against voicing the fact aloud. Besides... It did mean less work for you while you were still getting adjusted to everything, including the memory loss.

The moment Joshua took your hand, though, you realized just how touchy everyone there is. His hand was warm, calloused fingers (that of a guitarist, you thought to yourself) pressing into your skin as he guided you out of the church and off toward the east.

He’d already started talking about the river nearby and how it wasn’t too deep in certain parts, but they could still fish in it. Fishing was easier than trying to grab a fish with your bare hands. Trust him, he’d watched someone try it out of frustration. It’s only funny the first few times before it became sad. He pointed other things out for you, though, on that walk down the hill: trees where he knew birds nested (to be left alone--he liked to listen to the birds sing and didn’t want anyone to scare them off). Where he knew he’d seen rabbits a few times in the past, and he told you that if you stayed slow and quiet enough that you’d maybe see them for yourself. There was something beautiful about nature that he almost hated the fact they’d hunt for meat sometimes. It was a necessity, sure, but sometimes he wanted to just sit and watch the world pass by for a while.

“I’m sure Chan mentioned the lake that’s down there,” Joshua pointed off towards it. “Cheol wants me to take you there just so you know where it is.”

You, honestly, had no idea how true it was. If it was just a straight shot down, then wouldn’t that be enough guidance? But you didn’t question Joshua, walking close to him by the riverside. He said nothing, letting a comfortable silence fall between you as the two of you listened to the river and the birds and the breeze. It was nice. You didn’t feel a pressure to talk about things you couldn’t remember about yourself, or to prod him for details.

True to Chan’s words, the lake really was beautiful. With no pollution to cloud it, you could see far down inside it and the life it held. Joshua stood behind you on the dock there, looking around casually enough. Almost as though he expected something else to be there--but if he did, he didn’t tell you and you weren’t going to pry. After a few minutes rest, Joshua told you to come along--that the hour’s walk back would be tiring enough and the two of you could rest by the river.

“Do you like it here so far?” He asked at one point, maybe around the halfway point when you really thought about it. ���I’m sure you know you don’t have to stay if you don’t want, but if there’s anything we can do, just let us know.”

“Why do some of you talk like I’ve already decided to stay?”

Joshua continued a step ahead of you, not looking back. “I think they’re really hoping you will.”

“It’s not annoying to have another person?”

He shook his head. “The company’s genuinely nice to have. I think we all want you to stay, but... Cheol wouldn’t force you. But if you do decide you want to leave... Just know you’ll always have a place here if you need it.”

That was... nice, to be honest. It was good to know that if you decided you didn’t want to stay that they wouldn’t turn you away again in the future. Truthfully, you didn’t know what you wanted yet. It was nice being there with them, sure, but what about the rest of the world? What if there were other people somewhere out there, farther than they’d checked? The thought stayed with you for the rest of the walk back, until you could see the walls surrounding the church. Joshua as he guided you over to where some shady trees overlooked the river.

“So that was the lake,” he said. “It’s really nice in summer, you know. If you like swimming, you should come with us next time we go.”

He let go of you in favor of sitting right at the edge where the shadows ended, enough that he could see the sky without being blinded by the sun. Joshua looked up at you, gently patting the spot next to him for you to join him. When you did, he finally leaned back, looking up at the clear blue sky overhead.

After a moment, you decided to join him, slowly lying back next to him.

“I think Chan’s glad you’re here,” he mused aloud. “Hansol, too. But especially Chan. I don’t think he hated being new, but I think he’s glad it’s not him anymore.”

You shut your eyes with a hum of acknowledgement, and just listened to the sound of running water. The slow, steady sounds of Joshua breathing next to you.

His fingers grazed against yours for just a moment, enough to let you know he was still right there. “I hope you don’t take it personally the way some people are treating you,” he said, and you had to wonder if Jeonghan had told him. “Just give them some time to warm up to you.”

“Joshua?” You said after a moment, opening your eyes. “Do you really not remember anything but your name?”

He was quiet for a while. “Is that really what they told you?” He said. “That we don’t remember anything at all?”

“Yes?”

“Then... I think they were trying to spare your feelings,” he said. “I mean. A lot of us have been here for over a year. We remembered little things. I mean, not a lot, but... Sometimes I think I dream about my parents. I can’t remember their faces,” his voice wavered there, “but I’ll remember them. The sound of my mom’s voice.” His fingers brushed against your hand again, and you ended up taking his hand in your own. “But I remember going on bike rides by the river where I lived. And...” He pulled his hand away, resting it on his stomach. “That’s it. Just little things like that, I think.”

You turned your head to face him, watching the distant way he continued to gaze up at the sky. “You think?”

Joshua let out a quiet mmh in response, staring up a few moments longer. Eventually he turned, those pretty doe eyes meeting your gaze as he smiled at you. “What about you?” He said. “I’m sure there’s something in that pretty head,” he turned onto his side. “Anything come up yet?”

Had you? Remembering was... weird. In theory, it should be easy to remember going out for ice cream with someone and the taste even if the details became fuzzy like the color spoon you used. Yet when you tried to remember your hometown, the house you grew up in, the classroom you spent too many exhausted hours in learning math.. all of it was just a blur. A concept that you knew had to have existed in your life at some point, but blank and white like a primed canvas without a single pencil line to guide you. Yet when you thought back to the day before, there had been familiarity in Jeonghan bringing you fruit.

“I remember...” You wracked your brain, almost as if you could reel in a memory if you just reached far enough for it. The sweetness of a strawberry lingered on your tongue in memory, the sound of a plate being set down next to you onto a hard surface--a desk, maybe--enough to tug on that line. “Strawberries.”

Joshua perked up a little. “Strawberries?”

“Yeah,” you said. You could practically feel something coming back to you, just barely underneath your fingertips and at the tip of your tongue. “I remember having strawberries. I think... someone used to cut them up for me when I was a kid. Strawberries... and peaches, I think. And apples, too.”

“Like your parents?” Joshua asked quietly. “Or a sibling?”

That little hope in your chest seemed to dwindle down. “I don’t remember.”

“That’s okay,” he said. “Most people remember their name before they remember anything about their lives.” Joshua reached for your hand, wrapping both of his around it. “This is a step, okay? It’s a bigger one than any of us expected this soon. Sometimes it helps to remember little things like that.” He paused for a moment, running his thumb along your knuckles. “Seungkwan always seemed drawn to oranges before he remembered his name. He thinks that his home had them now, even if he can’t fully remember.”

That was reassuring, to be honest. It felt weird remembering something so small before your name. Joshua slowly unwrapped his hands from yours and laid back into the grass. He said nothing else, waiting to see what you would do first. When you laid back next to him, he just smiled and went back to marveling at the few wispy clouds in the sky. You decided to say nothing as well. The two of you just laid there underneath the shade, watching the world pass by for a while. The bubbling brook, the sound of wind shaking the leaves, the distant call of someone to another that was too far to make out clearly. Loud enough you could hear them, though, voices lost to the wind.

The sound of the ground crunching underneath someone--multiple someones--was enough to bring you back to reality and out of that tiny little moment of just existing beside another person. You looked up to see Jun with Mingyu and Minghao, carrying a basket between them and makeshift fishing rods.

Minghao looked to Joshua. “Stop slacking off with them,” he chided gently with a pout. Joshua chuckled from beside you, and you realized how it didn’t feel malicious--more like playful banter between friends.

“We were just resting,” Joshua said as he got up. He extended a hand to you, helping you to your feet. “Is this what we’re having for dinner?”

Mingyu smiled. “Part of it,” he said. “Cheol has plans.”

“Sounds like fun,” Joshua chuckled. He then took your hand, “C’mon. There’s another place Chan actually said he didn’t get to show you.”

Joshua pointed out a few more things to you on the walk back up. There were a few paths carved out of the fields that merely lead to more clearings, some that were actually made by them and the others just being spaces where the grass didn’t seem to grow nearly as high. He told you vaguely of the city far off, saying that maybe Seungcheol would take you with him for a trip one day if they needed you there. Weird things happened, and the city was purely their backup. Some miracles had to be chased, after all. But he guided you back into the church in the end, and you noticed how much cleaner it’d become over the past day--not just from the small party’s effort the day before, but it looked as though someone had come in and tidied up the rest of the room better. The curtains were drawn back to let in the natural light, some of the chairs had been actually stacked away properly with the stuffed toys sitting along the wall in a neat little line. You had to wonder who was on cleaning duty that day if they took so much care in a little thing like that. Joshua pushed back one of the curtains, letting you walk through before he continued to guide you back to that ladder Chan hadn’t guided you up the day before. He led the way up, telling you to not look down after a quip that he hoped you were good with heights. He crouched at the entrance, waiting for you to come up, a hand at your back to support you in case you happened to lose your balance.

The room itself was bathed in shades of yellow, purely because of that stained glass sun. There was a bed in front of it, thick curtains hung from the ceiling that would probably extinguish every yellow ray if they were drawn. There was a guitar in one corner that was clean save for a few smudges of paint on it. Inside an open-faced cupboard with its own few stains of bright paint that stood out against the shined, dark brown wood were an assortment of games and cards and other silly childish things that anyone could find entertainment with. A soccer ball had been abandoned somewhere, likely brought up as a way of keeping it somewhere out of the way until people wanted to play.

“If you ever can’t find someone, they’ll probably be up here,” Joshua said as he made his way over to that bed. He sat down, watching you with an amused glimmer in his eyes. “It’s kind of where we all hang out sometimes when we wanna do something fun.” He nodded over toward the assortment of games. “Sometimes they can get a little old, but we make do.”

You walked over to crouch down, reading off the names quietly to yourself. You could hear a squeak of the bed, and you looked back to see that Joshua had flopped back onto it.

“It’s also a really good place to take a nap,” he called out to you after a moment. “Everyone will vouch for that.”

“Really?”

“Mmhm,” he chuckled a second later. “Which means I’m going to take advantage of a day off.” He propped himself up by his elbows just to look back at you. “If you want to join me, you can. I’ve been told I’m a very good cuddle partner.”

You snorted in response. “I think I’m fine,” you said. “Thanks, Joshua,” you started back toward the ladder. “I think I’m gonna learn my way around.”

He gave you a thumbs up and a request to stay out of trouble before he fell back against the mattress, slowly shifting to get more comfortable as you started to leave. You descended the ladder while making a conscious effort to not stare directly down unless you wanted your heart to leap back into your throat, and you made your way back into the main living space. Walking that path alone felt weird, but you pushed past it. You only had guides because you were new, and you needed to learn if you were going to stay. The main room was fine, but there were the other rooms that Chan had merely told you about with a passing glance to identify them. The storage room, a few side rooms where other people’s personal spaces were...

But you slowed to a stop when you heard the sound of a voice carrying down a hallway, prettier than anything you thought you’d heard before. You followed the sound instead, coming to a space where Jihoon had been sitting across the room. His notebook was open and another guitar sat in his lap, this one covered in stickers and paint. He seemed lost in what he was doing, Seungkwan sitting criss-cross on the floor nearby as he listened and nodded along. You just stood there, lingering in the doorway as you listened to him sing.

“I can smile because we’re together... I can cry because it’s you...”

A hand landed at your back, gentle enough to alert you to someone’s presence. When you looked up, Hansol stood there for just a moment before he started past you. Then he slowed to a stop as he turned back to face you, nodding to come on with him.

“They won’t bite,” he told you, despite the way Jihoon had stopped singing when he noticed you’d been watching. “It’s okay, Mouse.”

Seungkwan had looked up, and waved for you to come over to sit with him. Yet you noticed the way Jihoon had hesitated, going to close his notebook and to potentially leave, a quiet apology on his lips about something--being too loud, you thought, but you didn’t catch it.

Seungkwan looked up with a pout. “You shouldn’t stop because they’re here,” he said. “How do you think that makes them feel?”

Jihoon stopped what he was doing as the words sank in, and then he looked back to you. With a small apology and a bow, he opened his notebook back up while Hansol took his seat next to Seungkwan--leaving the perfect amount of space for you to come and sit between them. Just to add a little more pressure for you to join, Seungkwan patted the spot excitedly, which was enough for you to make your way over and sink down between the two.

“Jihoon’s really talented,” Seungkwan whispered to you while Jihoon flipped through a few pages.

“Legit one of the most talented dudes here,” Hansol said, despite the way Jihoon’s face had started to turn bright red in stark contrast to his paler skin tone. “I don’t think he’s written a bad song.”

Jihoon stopped on a page, reading it over. “This is a work in progress,” he said as he looked back to the three of you, “But--”

“Please play it,” Seungkwan said. “We’ll love it.”

Jihoon’s gaze landed on you again, and you almost offered to leave if it made him more comfortable. But Hansol curled an arm around you, leaving you to only give Jihoon what you hoped was a reassuring smile. Jihoon nodded to himself, strumming a few strings before looking back down at the makeshift sheet music he’d drawn for himself.

When Jihoon began to sing--just vocalizing in a series of pretty notes--you felt this sense of clarity hit you. His voice was pretty, sure, but when he started to sing, the lyrics felt like their own piece of art. He stumbled at one point, flipping a page and skipping onward to something that felt more polished. Like he’d spent more time refining it until it was perfect, even if he couldn’t come up with the lyrics leading into it. You barely noticed the way Seungkwan laid his head on your shoulder, or the way Hansol’s arm curled a little more securely around you as the three of you grew cozy together.

“It’s okay, your world is fine. You are who you are. It’s precious and precious--stay here with me....”

Jihoon seemed closer to you in that moment than he did the day before, even though the fact that he made you tea to help with the headaches was an outright sign that he cared at least a little for your well-being. His voice seemed to put all of you at ease as you grew a little more comfortable with each other, a little more at home. Hansol was warm next to you, and Seungkwan slid a little closer to wrap his arms around one of yours. Just to be close to you in this intimate moment of Jihoon baring his soul through music. The next hour (maybe a little more, maybe a little less--you hadn’t looked for a clock) had been filled with songs, all unfinished by Jihoon, that still felt like masterpieces in their own right.

You’d heard footsteps, though, and turned to see Mingyu waving at you. “Mouse,” he called out, enough to stop the music for a moment. “Can you come help?”

He didn’t say what, but you agreed easily enough. Untangling yourself from Seungkwan and Hansol was easy enough, even if Seungkwan had kept his hand in yours for a moment longer--whining that Mingyu could find someone else because they were all listening to Jihoon sing. You apologized to them before thanking Jihoon for letting you listen, and turned to quickly head to Mingyu. He walked ahead of you, asking idly if you liked Jihoon’s voice.

“He’s beautiful,” you said without thinking. “His voice, I mean. And the lyrics--”

“No, you’re right,” he chuckled. “Jihoon’s beautiful. You should tell him that sometime. He’ll probably turn red, but he’ll appreciate it.”

Jun had been chopping vegetables at one of the countertops, humming to himself one of the half-finished songs from Jihoon. There was plenty covering those countertops--freshly cleaned fish, other fruit and vegetables that’d been already cleaned of dirt--and Mingyu nudged for you to continue toward Jun.

“Just help Jun,” he had told you, and you agreed easily enough. You felt a little bad for slacking off with Joshua earlier and then getting lured into Jihoon’s voice like a sailor to their death.

(Although, truthfully, if Jihoon was a siren, you’d gladly drown to hear such a pretty sound again.)

Jun reached down to a basket of sweet potatoes that’d been resting near his feet, and set it down next to the sink. He told you to start washing them completely, just to get them completely scrubbed clean and ready to be roasted. Seungcheol was outside with Wonwoo starting a fire, and they’d bring everything out later when they were ready to cook.

“Have you ever cooked before?” Jun asked as you turned on the water.

The process felt... familiar. You couldn’t remember cooking, sure, but it felt natural to you. “I think so,” you said.

“Good,” Mingyu said. “It’s always good to have another person who can cook, especially when we’re feeding fourteen.”

You could only imagine how annoying it could be, but the fact he already counted you as one of them didn’t go unnoticed by you. “Is it really good that I’m here?”

Neither answered you, and you noticed the concerned glance that they gave one another. There was a certain implication to your words, and you scrambled to explain yourself, “I just--Did you guys... y’know, want another person around?”

“It doesn’t matter what any of us wanted,” was what Jun said after a moment. “You’re here now. And you’re one of us... if you choose to stay, that is.”

Mingyu nodded happily. “Right! Cheol told you we’d take care of you. It’s okay if you feel out of place,” he turned back to the fish in front of him. “I felt weird when I first came here, too.”

So did everyone, apparently. “Was it bad?”

“They were accepting,” he said. “But... I’m clumsy sometimes,” he admitted sheepishly. “I accidentally broke a lot of things at first. There’s a reason most breakable things are pushed out of the way.”

“He broke a lot of things,” Jun reiterates to you, still chopping away. “You’ll learn.”

Mingyu’s smile was enough to tell you all you needed to know what Jun meant by that. He casually changed the topic, telling you that a fork was in one of the drawers near you and that Jun could grab the aluminum foil off one of the taller shelves for you since his hands were cleaner. True enough, Jun set it down next to you after a moment, making small talk with you as best as they could. For the most part, it was just them telling you about life there--about things that happened when both of them first came. You just listened to them for the next few hours as you continued to carefully scrub potatoes completely clean of dirt before poking holes into them and wrapping them up snug. No one had been in any kind of a hurry, thankfully, since dinner was still hours away.

Mingyu looked over to check on your progress, noticing you’d almost finished off the basket. “Can you go ahead and  take those up? I’ll be right there.”

With the final sweet potato carefully wrapped just as snug as the rest, you nodded and picked up the heavy basket. You knew that one of them would probably have carried it easier than you did, but you were happy to help where you could and made your way through the hallway, careful not to push your limits. It was easy enough to set the basket up when you reached the opening, climbing up before picking it back up and continuing back inside. You find Seungcheol and Wonwoo easily enough around a fire that’d just been started, wood stacked up with enough room for the potatoes inside. Both greeted you casually enough as you brought the basket over, Seungcheol turning his attention back to prodding things as best as he could without getting burnt while Wonwoo stayed crouched beside him.

“Mouse,” Wonwoo called out, voice low and soft, “can you remember if you’ve ever been camping?”

“I can’t,” you said after a moment. You went to sit next to Wonwoo, only for him to ward you back from getting too close.

The basket sat in front of you, and Seungcheol reached out a hand. Wonwoo caught on before you did and he started to hand the potatoes over to him, Seungcheol placing them near enough that they wouldn’t be directly in the fire--but close enough that they’d likely spend the next full hour cooking all the way through.

“Joshua told me that you remembered something about fruit?” Seungcheol looked back. “It’s okay. Most of us don’t remember that much about our lives.”

“What do you remember, then?” You draped your arms over your knees.

He went quiet for a moment, pensively thinking back on it. He looked over to Wonwoo, calling his name to prompt him to answer. It was probably his way of buying time for himself.

Wonwoo nodded, though, musing on the question himself. “My little brother,” he said. “I can’t remember his name or his face, but... I remember him existing.” He paused. “And... I can remember crying at movies. And cats.” He looked back toward the fire for a moment, the light reflecting in his glasses. “I remember feeding stray cats.”

Seungcheol sat there for a moment, sinking down to where he was sitting properly on the ground. “I think I used to do martial arts.” He licked his lips, mulling over it for a moment longer. “And I remember going for trips with my family over the summer. And...” Another moment, just to think. “Cherry ice cream.”

It was little things, ultimately. Even if they couldn’t put a name to a face, they remembered people. Things they used to do in whatever life came before this one.

“Mouse?” Seungcheol said, and you looked up from where you’d gotten lost in thought while watching them make sure the fire was properly lit. “Can you go tell everyone we’re ready? Dinner won’t be ready for awhile, but it’s nice to have time together.”

You agreed to it without hesitating. You stood up, dusting yourself off, and then took off to go find people--starting with the people inside the main living space. You didn’t get far before you found Minghao looking around the storage area--in the area where the blankets and spare clothing were.

“Come here,” he called out when he saw you, digging through a basket. When you grew closer, he pulled the sweater draped over his shoulder off of it and held it up to you. It was blue and pink and orange and honestly looked like it’d fit you perfectly. He let out a sigh of relief. “No one else looked for something for you, so I did.”

You felt your face grow warmer at that, and Minghao pushed the sweater into your arms before turning his attention back to his search. More clothing ended up in your arms--pale greens and oranges and blues--as Minghao put things aside. A few pairs of soft pants to sleep in, of white pants and shades of pale brown, end up atop them. He told you to try them on later when you had the chance, but he had a good feeling that they’d fit perfectly.

“It’s not fair to leave you in those clothes,” he said. “Showing you around is important, but...” He took the pile from your arms. “If you’re going to stay, you deserve to feel at home, too.”

You blinked a few times at the thoughtfulness in that. “I thought you didn’t...”

“Like you?” Was it that obvious? Minghao shook his head. “It’s just... hard getting used to another new person. We thought Chan was going to be the last.” He paused, “It was just a feeling we had.” He paused, “You’re here now. You’re one of us if you stay. I’m sorry that I made you feel unwanted.”

“You didn’t--”

“I did, and I’m sorry.” He waved you off as he started to move past you, saying something about how he’d put the clothes with your things.

You called out his name, earning a hum of acknowledgement as he looked back at you. “Cheol said everything’s ready outside.”

He nodded. “I’ll be out in a bit. You should wash up and get changed into something clean sometime.”

Minghao left you standing there, and you returned to your mission at hand. You found Jihoon wandering alone, and when you told him, he merely gave you an “okay” and a thanks for telling him. You passed Seungcheol’s message onto Jeonghan and Joshua, who you’d found sitting together talking about something they shut up about when you came in. Your job was easier when you found Hansol, Seungkwan, and Chan together.

Seungkwan called out to you as you started to leave. “Soonyoung and Seokmin said they were going to play cards,” he pointed up, “Just so you know.”

You thanked him and took off running to go find them. You scaled the ladder, finding Seokmin and Soonyoung sitting across from one another on the bed in front of the sun-window. They heard the sound of someone coming up, and Soonyoung’s eyes glimmered the moment he saw it was you.

“Mouse!” He said, and he motioned you over. “We were about to start a new game.” He started to shift over, making space for you. “Come play with us.”

“Cheol said--”

He giggled, “We have time for a quick game.”

So you relented, climbing into the space. While you were missing a lot, things like card games felt... a little closer to a memory you did have. Seokmin walked you through the rules casually enough, and they felt familiar. Like when you were cooking earlier: the motions were there, the knowledge hidden in the crevices in your mind, just struggling to be retrieved of then when and where and how you learned all of it.

“You seem like you’ve been busy,” Seokmin commented while Soonyoung was studying his cards. “Are you more comfortable with us?”

Admittedly, you were. “A little.”

“Good,” he smiled. “It’s good to have other people--” He was cut off by Soonyoung slapping down a card. “Soonyoung--”

He just giggled in response. “Should have dealt them better.”

You looked between the two of them. “How long have the two of you been here?”

Soonyoung mentally began to do that math in his head, lowering his cards into his lap as he mulled over the question. “Almost two years,” he said after a moment.

Seokmin merely nodded along. “A little over a year.”

You took in the information. If Soonyoung had been here for almost two years, and Seungcheol had been here longer than that....

... You weren’t going to remember anything anytime soon, were you? Maybe you’d at least get lucky with remembering your name soon enough.

Soonyoung ended up winning that game--again, considering the way he was gloating about his winning streak. Seokmin had already begun gathering the cards to put them away. You went ahead and left the attic first, waiting at the bottom of the ladder to head out with them once they joined you. Everyone else had already gathered by the time you three joined, talking amongst themself. Mingyu happily greeted Seokmin, despite being busy with cooking, and that caused him to part from your side. Soonyoung practically pounced on Jihoon when he saw him, who went wide-eyed for a moment but grew accustomed to it after a moment--even if he was shoving him off while suppressing a smile. You could see smudges of pink paint against his cheek, and you soon realized that was Jeonghan’s doing. He’d been sitting criss-cross on the ground, painting shapes onto Chan’s face. Minghao sat close by, amused by whatever encouragement Hansol had been giving (when you came closer, you realized he was quietly chanting draw a dick, draw a dick while Chan was trying to not crack up). Jeonghan lightly scolded him, smearing yellow across Hansol’s cheek before he went back to finish the little painting of a sun on Chan’s cheek.

Although you tried to slip past unnoticed, you completely failed because Jeonghan cried out a “Mouse!” the moment he saw you. He beckoned you over, and you sank down into the empty space next to Chan. Jeonghan slid his materials over, turning to face you as he gestured for you to lean in.

He rinsed and dried his brushes, dipping his paint into the paint. You tried to stay steady as the brush tickled your skin, Jeonghan starting close to your eye--right in that space between your eye and your temple. Chan leaned forward, watching as Jeonghan worked slower, more patiently to make sure that it looked pretty.

Chan glanced up at Hansol. “Why don’t you tell him to paint a dick on them?”

“It’s funnier when it’s you,” he chuckled. “Also, it’s their second day. They can get dicks drawn on them later.”

The casual way he said it made you nearly snort in laughter. “Remind me to avoid Hansol if he has paint,” you hummed, stilling yourself again as Jeonghan continued to paint your face.

Minghao commented at one point that it looked good, leaving you to wonder what Jeonghan was doing. You caught a glimpse of yellow paint at one point--bright golden, to be exact. Soon enough, he reached over into his box and pulled out a shard of a mirror and held it up. You could see a small sunflower painted near your eye with little green leaves with it, a smudge of bright blue from where his thumb had been pressing into your skin to keep your face steady. You didn’t let him wipe it off--it added to it, in your opinion.

He let you leave then, letting you go socialize with the others. Joshua was sitting on a log with the guitar from the attic in his lap, lightly strumming it as he tuned it. Seungcheol sat with him, Seungkwan sitting in front of his legs while Wonwoo sitting on the ground on the other side of Joshua, a cup in his hand housing something you couldn’t quite see.

“Hello, darling,” Joshua’s pretty cadence made you feel at home. He stood long enough to make room for you to sit between him and Seungcheol. Seungkwan scooted forward enough to let you between him and the log, and you settled in next to Seungcheol. “I see Jeonghan got to you.”

You felt a little sheepish at the way he seemed to admire the flower there. “Is it pretty?”

He smiled. “It is,” he brushed his hair back from his eyes. “Was Hansol trying to convince him to draw a dick on Chan again?”

“From what I heard,” you said. “Does it happen often?”

“He’s not the only one who does it,” Joshua said, testing the strings again. “I swear it’s just a joke. I promise no one’s going to draw a dick on you.”

“Yet,” Wonwoo muttered.

Seungkwan puffed up in your defense. “No one’s going to draw a dick on them at all!” He rolled his eyes. “Aish... You’re all so immature. What’s so funny about drawing a dick on someone?”

Seungcheol reached out to ruffle his hair, laughing softly at the way Seungkwan ducked away after a moment. “Stop talking about dicks,” he said to the entire group, looking to you. “You seem more comfortable, Mouse.”

Seokmin had said it before, and now you were wondering just how different you looked in comparison to yesterday. How terrified had you looked among them? Even after Chan showed you around? You didn’t want to dwell on it too much. It’s not like anyone could blame you for being scared anyway.

“I am,” you told him, finding a little more happiness in the fact. While you didn’t know exactly where you stood with someone like Jihoon, it helped to see how accepting everyone was of you. Although... Jihoon did keep playing earlier. That had to mean something, right?

Joshua asked if anyone had any requests. Despite not remembering everything about his life, he remembered bits and pieces of songs--and he’d learned a few of Jihoon’s too. Songs that Jihoon had told him fit his voice better, apparently. Maybe some of the things Joshua knew were from a life long past, heard online or on the radio at some point. Why did all of that feel so distant? You could remember technology existing, sure, but you’d yet to see a single thing since you woke up here--save for the things essential to cooking comfortably and storing food. You felt unplugged, yet there was no weird sense of withdrawal from it all. No need to remember the people you went to school with, or to find a way to call your family. They were all just blurry faces in the distant past. You assumed that sort of thing would come with old age, but...

There was something feeling about that now. You didn’t have to worry about how you measured up to your peers, to your coworkers. About that wedding someone was having to someone you swore they had just met. About the person already having a second kid despite being barely into their twenties. Maybe it made you judgmental, but you couldn’t understand how people were so put together to get married before twenty-five and to already have two or three kids. Weren’t they lost? Struggling to figure out their place in the world? Why would you make such big decisions so early in life?

Maybe it was just you who was lost. But that didn’t matter now. All of that was in the past.

You leaned into Seungcheol, who wrapped an arm around you as you all listened to Joshua sing. Could everyone there sing? You had to wonder if maybe they were singers in a past life. Jihoon certainly had the talent for it, and so did Joshua. It was soothing to listen to him, his voice sweet like honey and warmer than the sun. Seungcheol ran his thumb up and down your arm in a soothing motion.

It was nice. The day seemed to fly by, to be honest. Mingyu called out soon enough that the food was done and it was time to eat. You listened in silence to the stories they exchanged, either reminiscing or trying to embarrass one another in front of you. It made you feel at home, even when you watched Seungkwan lunge at Jeonghan for playfully recounting an embarrassing moment during his initial days, courtesy of Soonyoung scaring him. It took both Mingyu and Hansol to pull him fully back into his seat near you. Seokmin had handed him a small foil-wrapped bundle of sliced apples topped with cinnamon and sugar and butter to make him fully quiet down, and you just sidled up closer to him to keep him a little more distracted. The way Jun reached for another sweet potato in glee made you giggle, and you almost didn’t notice the way Seungkwan had been looking at you, a slice hanging off of his fork that he offered to you once you met his gaze. You reached for it, only for him to gently push his fork a little closer for you to just pull it off with your teeth--no need to get your fingers sticky.

He smiled, though, and you have to fight back a giggle at how cute he could be when he wasn’t ready to fight someone. Mingyu brought you your own bundle of apples a moment later, ruffling your hair before he settled back into his spot next to Wonwoo.

“It’s weird,” Joshua mused aloud, his guitar back in his lap after the last hour of dinner. “It almost feels like Mouse has been here longer.”

Everyone seemed to agree with that. Even you.

“We’re having a proper meal together,” Seungcheol said. “That brings people together.“

“Mmhm,” Hansol sounded off. “And they’re actually talking to us today.”

Your face heated up at the fact. You had been chattier than you were the day before, hadn’t you? Maybe you just needed a proper sleep to feel right.

The fire crackled as the conversation seemed to slowly die down, Joshua idly strumming his guitar. You half-listened to the quiet talk around you, more preoccupied with enjoying your little bit of dessert while observing your surroundings a little more. There was a pipe sticking out of the ground closer to the walls where you assume the nearby bucket of water had been filled earlier. Maybe that was why they chose to have their little campfire and grilling setup there. The river could have been an option, sure, but the ground was much more flat there. The sun set soon enough, painting everyone in a pretty orange glow before it started to fully disappear beyond the horizon. Seungcheol had been the one to break up the night, telling everyone that they should get some sleep soon after they finished cleaning up. You did your part to help before Mingyu waved you off that he and Wonwoo had everything else handled.

So you stayed behind with Seungcheol, watching him carry the bucket of water. You waved Chan off when he lagged for a moment to wait for you, and he frowned before getting pulled along by Hansol. Seungcheol looked up when you approached him.

“I can do this, Mouse,” he said, reaching up to ruffle your hair. “Don’t worry.”

You nodded, staying crouched nearby. “Cheol...” You watched as he poured water over the fire, reaching for a nearby stick. He prodded through the ashes, looking for any embers that were still glowing. “Is it really okay that I’m here?”

Seungcheol merely nodded once, not looking up from his current job. “I wouldn’t have brought you if I wasn’t sure.” He scraped off pieces of wood, still searching, and he reached for the bucket again when he uncovered those little glowing orange spots. They hissed quietly when he doused them again, finally dying down for good. “Do you want to leave? You seemed happier today.”

“I was.” You paused. “I am.” The ashes had turned black, and Seungcheol reached out to hover his hand over them to ensure that the fire had gone out completely. You waited until he had pulled his hand back, no warmth to be found and his job completed. “I just wanted to make sure.”

He stood up, as did you, and you watched him glance down to his hands to ensure they had no ash on them before he rested a hand on your shoulder. “You’re welcome here as long as you want to be here.” Seungcheol gently tugged you toward him, one arm around you as he began to walk forward. “If you want to leave... You can. But... I really think we’re all that’s left.”

“The world’s big,” you mused aloud.

“It is. But how far can we go on our own?” Seungcheol stopped right at that space between the walls, the church within sight. “Mouse,” he said, voice lower and more serious than his softer tone before. “Do you want to stay?”

Did you? Either you could take a bag and disappear out into the world and possibly never find your way back... or you could stay with people who wanted you there, even if some struggled to show it. People who could keep you warm and fed as long as you did your share of the work. People who cared.

“I do.”

“Then stay,” he said, and Seungcheol leaned forward to press a kiss to the crown of your head. A comforting action that felt safe in itself: gauged carefully by the slow way he did it. “Go get some sleep.”

He didn’t need to tell you twice. The fatigue had already started to set in as you drifted away from Seungcheol, who you could only assume had a few more things he needed to take care of before his work was fully done for the night. As much as you didn’t want to wash the paint from your skin, all of Jeonghan’s work disappearing far too soon, you were slick with sweat and grime and needed that shower. You gathered some of the softer clothing that Minghao had laid out for you, folding your dirty clothes into a pile and setting them aside. The others had started to get ready for bed, and you bid them goodnight as you started to make it back to your own little nook there.

“Mouse?” Jeonghan said, watching you head up. “Are you sure you want to sleep alone?” He just stood there, voice quiet. “You don’t have to join us, but... it helps sometimes.”

They’d given you your space. You still had it, knowing that they wouldn’t take it from you. You could have told Jeonghan no, but...

“Yeah,” you said. “Let me grab something, okay?”

“If you change your mind, it’s okay,” he told you.

You didn’t. You returned to your little area, leaving your dirty clothes in a separate spot from the rest of it, and took your little mouse from where it’d been tucked under the blankets like a child. Chan had practically lit up when he saw that you came to join them, reaching out for you already.

“You already hog their attention,” Soonyoung said from beside him. “Mouse should come sleep with us,” he giggled, sliding a little closer to Chan. Seungkwan had been on the other side of him, rolling his eyes (yet still smiling) at the whiny tone Soonyoung had taken on. Soonyoung continued to do grabby hands toward you. “Don’t you wanna cuddle with us? Please?”

In everything they ask of you, there was always an implied notion to only do it if you wanted to. It was sweet to know that no one was going to hold anything against you. Despite the way Chan had pouted at you when you made your way to Soonyoung, settling in between him and Seungkwan, you noticed he smiled when you let Soonyoung cuddle close to you. You reached an arm past him, though, inviting Chan to reach up and intertwine his fingers with yours. He squeezed. I’m here, too, was what the action said. We’re here. You’re not alone.

Seungkwan turned onto his side, noticing your little plush mouse. “Cute,” he murmured, nuzzling a little closer to you. Not enough to squish your tiny plush companion, but enough that he could press his forehead against your shoulder if he leaned just a little closer.

The lights were dimmed soon enough, and you heard the way Joshua commented that you’d already been brought into their cuddle pile. Faster than some of them, sure, but you could hear Jeonghan say that some of them had joined in from day one to have that physical comfort of knowing they weren’t alone. When you fell asleep between Soonyoung and Seungkwan, you felt safe and secure with the scene of vanilla wafting around you.

Seungcheol stopped when he came into the room after his own shower, realizing one more body than he expected. But he smiled to himself, happy to see the way you nuzzled a little closer to Seungkwan in your sleep with that pretty, happy smile that he’d loved seeing on you all day. He noticed the little mouse tucked between the two of you, button eyes staring back at him. He glanced over to where Joshua and Jeonghan were curled up with Jun in between them for once. Wonwoo had been on the other side of Seungkwan, and Seungcheol looked to see that Mingyu had left enough space for him, with Minghao back to back with him on his other side, if he wanted it. Jihoon had been nestled between Hansol and Seokmin (and Seungcheol noticed that Seokmin had cuddled close to him, apparently taking full advantage of being one of the few people who could initiate skinship with him.

Seungcheol curled up in that empty space beside Mingyu, gently telling him to go back to sleep when he stirred and glanced up at the slight disturbance. He watched the younger settle back into his spot, content that Seungcheol had finally joined them, and then he looked back up to the cave ceiling. They’d painted little white stars among the blue backdrop a while back, shortly after Soonyoung arrived. He said the color of the cave made it harder to sleep when he looked up at it at night. Had you noticed before you went to sleep? Seungcheol looked back to where you were peacefully sleeping. Maybe you did. Maybe one night all of them could go sleep under the stars for once. It’d been a while since he’d done that, after all.

Even though they all barely knew you, Seungcheol could tell that they were already beginning to accept and love you as one of their own. He did, too.

taglist: @shiningstar-byulxx @twogyuu  @maijunejuly  @strawberri-uyu @junhui-recs  @bbmyungho @thedeeppoet @min-tata @silvsie @heeseung-lover686 @lilactangerine @jeonncafe  @bfwonu

[xiaoluclair]

38 lestappen

38. life or death kiss // lestappen // [ rating: M ] // skip all the way to the end for warnings but beware they do contain spoilers (obviously lol). also: MILD SMUT. not beta read! expect plenty of mistakes oops.

(the format of one section is inspired by a part from all to play for. it's small, but credit where credit is due.)

---

there is a prayer in the room, period one: 

don’t touch, don’t touch, don’t touch.

it speaks since hasselt, 1997. later (years later), he pictures a wikipedia page: the birth with a 500% death rate.

the baby next door goes home and is dressed in a swaddle of mint green. max goes home and is dressed in black.

a month after, his father asks, “can he still race?” it is not quite acceptance. it is as close as he is given for a while. 

they have pets. max, for all he knows about liking things, likes their pets. three dogs, four cats, two budgies, a pigeon. later (years later) he does not remember the soft of their fur, the tickle of their ears, the chip of their beaks.

older, he asks, did we give them to other people?

no, replies his father. you would not let me. now put your helmet on.

they had pets.

under gloves is where it hides, sleeps in pale skin. sweaty summers, blessed winters. winter, coincidentally, is his favorite time. good time, easier time. less poking curiosity from his class. a CONFIDENTIAL watermark over his name, his contract clauses, his life.

his dad finds him within a small patch of daisies by the hairpin. the skin on his hands is breathing, finding sunlight in the air. he says, "put your suit on."

max tries, "just one minute? the flowers are very beautiful."

his dad does not disagree. instead he crouches down, takes max's hand without much force. brings it to the ground between the grass. then, he he lets him go.

max stares up at him. he says, "put your suit on."

"but," says max. put your suit on. his dad only watches. waits. the grass thrums between max's fingers. a tickle touches his skin; a spider has found his thumb.

his dad says, "now." max takes his hand off the grass.

immediately, it starts to turn leathery. the daisies go brown, their stems withering. the spider curls into itself until it is a rib of thin legs, stills. max could touch it now. it would not change.

it is horrific.

what his dad says: "winners do not care about beauty."

what max remembers: winners are not beautiful.

anyway. max wins.

and wins.

and wins.

and wins.

he says later (years later), it was always just me and my dad. if i had a mother, it was racing. and i've made both of them proud today i think, so. it was worth it.

it was worth it.

he meets charles in the spring of 2012.

it's almost like meeting two people. in front of the camera, like a polished streak of metal. then on track, the abrasion of him. after, between walls, the thought of shutting him up, quietening his mouth with his own.

you could get me disqualified!

what about me? you pushed me first!

charles glances down more than a few times. max, the memory of a daisy in his head, flips him the bird before walking away.

in the van, he grabs his bottle of water. throws up into it.

anyway. apparently that is the start of a thing (nameless).

he meets charles in the winter of 2018.

he meets charles in the summer of 2019.

he meets charles in the autumn of 2020.

he meets charles in the spring of 2021.

there's the five of them, talking quietly together before the press conference starts. the current topic: charles.

he asks, “you had a problem in f2, right?” and charles, of course, nods. lando lets out a laugh. valterri blinks at the ceiling.

anyway, the red car is in the wall before lap two.

apparently charles is cursed too.

in 2021, max wins his first championship.

in 2022, he wins his second.

in 2023, he wins his third.

in the midst of them, there is a conversation:

he's in a club and the lights are low. sweat drips like rain down his back. he can feel it, the lake collecting in the hollow of his spine as he leans against the seat-back.

it displaces under the warm weight of a hand. 'sup, maximus?

daniel is drunk. he can barely hold conversation so he is very drunk. across the table, pierre is spilling a caipirinha over himself. daniel is also flirty, which says nothing about his inebriety. max, has anyone told you, you're very beautiful.

max rolls his eyes, tucks away the sour that threatens his mouth. winners, he says, the gin and tonic says, are not beautiful.

when he looks up, there are eyes already on him. charles turns, passes pierre another napkin.

in 2028, max retires with 4 championships. in abu dhabi, lando gives him a pack of colored fabric pens. for leather.

"for your." he nods to max's hands. there is latex on them right now ㅡ he has yet to change.

max grins. "thanks, mate. i'll have lots of fun with this one."

lando rolls his eyes. he's probably thinking max will draw a penis.

he's probably right.

in 2032, charles wins a championship. wins his first championship.

he opens the door of his hotel room the next afternoon, mouth like the moon. he offers max some room service soup. they chat, watch replays.

at a point (nameless), max catches charles's eyes. dark, heavy. his swallow gets stuck in his throat.

he thinks: just this once. just this time.

later (minutes later) charles, red, glistening, glowing from face to feet, comes stuttering on max's sweats, all over his glove.

he looks beautiful.

just this once. just this time.

what a load of bullshit.

inevitably probably, charles brings it up. max is crusting in his underwear, thinking of soaking a towel, when he does. he says, "you never touch me."

max blinks. shifts to rest on an elbow. he wiggles a hand, white on latex. "i do."

charles takes it and lowers it to the ruffled covers. "you know what i mean." asks, “why not?”

max bites his lip. glances at charles's own. away again. tells him, “you are beautiful.” 

an eyebrow quirks. "so?"

"so," says max, "i cannot."

after a moment: "i thought you said winners were not beautiful."

yeah. he did. his shoulders shrug and something small and heavy slips from their bone. "i was wrong."

after another moment: "i think you are beautiful too."

"good," replies max, cheeky. charles unravels him again far too soon until it is raw, on the verge painful, thin as a thread or the edge of a blade.

max is watching the race from his friend's balcony. he watches: car number 2 trip across the nouvelle chicane, car number 36 nearly slide into the wall at portier, car number 16 cross the line first.

after, in the evening, charles blisters his way into max's apartment. grabs one of max's gloves from drawer of the trophy cabinet. max is pushed gracelessly into the couch cushions.

equalizer 2 plays listlessly in the background as he comes on the leather over charles's fingers, the crude, childish drawing of a penis.

out of the blue one night, charles says, "i am in love with you."

across the couch, a lead weight knots itself through max's stomach. he says, "you cannot say that."

charles glances from the tv to their legs woven in the centre of the couch to max's face. "why not?"

max tries to explain, "it is a big thing."

charles says, "i know."

max thinks he would be more accepting of love if he knew how. if he grew with it. he knows love like: scraped skin, the edge of broken bones, a drop of gold.

he knows love like: the sun, the fur of bumblebees, a field of maize.

he does not know love like hot soup. like the swell of crescendo, like a heartbeat.

but he is learning.

in 2037, charles retires with 3 championships.

he lives in max's apartment in monaco. at some point, two cats appear. (appeared, echoes charles dubiously. max grins, innocence.)

so, they have pets.

once, he touches a plant. is knocked into it really, a rose on display at the garden centre, the edge of his cheek on a petal. it grays, withers, curls in guttering fashion. sickness steals right to his stomach. charles says, hey, a uniform walking by. do you have any fake plants?

the bedroom door locks at night to keep the cats out. sometimes, in the space (nameless) before they sleep, their hands will hold each other. hang above the floor between their beds. breathe in tandem.

charles: climbs a million mountains with his brothers, designs clothes, plays piano, comes home to max.

max: jet skis in every ocean, builds a karting track with daniel, wins sim races, comes home to charles.

and the cats. of course.

for many years, it is a good life.

everything is ready. within touching distance of the covers. a blue tube, piles of hand towels, energy bars, stacks of water bottles.

a laugh bubbles out from somewhere, the last dregs of ink from a pen. "this feels so fucking silly."

"i know," muses charles. "oh, i also brought jelly cubes." he gets them from his bag, puts them on the bedside table.

then. that's it. a gaze kneels in front of his own.

charles spreads his fingers, a flower in bloom. he whispers, "this is the hardest part."

max bites his lip. he puts his gloved hand into charles's palm.

charles's eyes are smiling a kaleidoscope, hair worn and soft between his skin.

this is it. thinks max. i'm about to touch a dead man. the thought makes him laugh.

charles grins too, like he knows max's head. he does, a little. he murmurs, "a kiss to seal the deal?" his eyes flick down.

a memory: you could get me disqualified. what about me? you pushed me first.

max pulls him in the rest of the way.

he pushed me, i pushed him back. you never touch me. winners are not beautiful. i am in love with you. you cannot say that. why not? nothing, just an incident. you are beautiful. winners do not care about beauty. just this once. just this time. i think you are beautiful too. i do. it is a big thing. i know.

i'm in love with you too.

there is a prayer in the room, period two: 

don’t let go, i won’t, don’t let go, i won’t, don’t let go, i won’t. 

the covers are off to the side. i get sweaty, max had said, when charles tried to lazily tug him closer. charles didn't waste much time expending the duvet after that.

they talk, a lot. more than he would've expected. "sometimes i think that is all we needed. someone else," murmurs max. he is aware of charles's touch as it moves down his stomach. he is also not usually one for what ifs.

(your mother was a racer herself. do you think she would be proud?

i don't know. it was always just me and my dad. if i had a mother, it was racing.)

"maybe," says charles quietly. "or maybe it would have been the same. maybe it could have been worse."

max says, "i wonder if they would've been like me."

charles hums. his hand has burned a line to the crease in max's legs. "i think it might be wonderful," he says eventually, "to have more of you in the world." then his hand slips entirely around him.

the sound max makes hits the back of charles's throat, is swallowed into his belly.

they shower together three times. max presses him into the wall, sinks to his knees. sucks the life out of him. they dry in the air three times, in the worn sheets that once lay made over the beds.

arthur asks once a day if it's normal for sassy to stare at him. she looks carnivorous, his texts read. the other one keeps jumping on me while i'm working out.

charles replies. max folds himself around his back. they laugh, they fuck, they eat, they drink, they shower, they sleep. they kiss, they kiss, they kiss. they touch.

a week is up far too soon.

this is the hardest part, charles had said.

no, thinks max as charles thumbs the skin of his shoulder. his smile is soft honey in the heat of sunrise. his moles glow. he is beautiful. this is.

charles says, "so? was it everything you dreamed of and more?" he is desert hot and clammy. his fingers are tender. the fatelines on his palms press to max's own.

max kisses him. "it was everything."

charles smiles into it. then, he lets go. they both do.

on may 3rd 2052, max goes home and dresses in black.

he has a clasp around his throat, unassumingly rectangular, engraved: CLV. a note in ink: worth it.

there is a prayer in the room, period one: 

thank you, thank you, thank you.

(it was beautiful.)

WARNINGS: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH | MILD SMUT

[spideyharrington]

Dreams Tonite

summary: y/n has had terrible generalized anxiety for as long as she can remember. luckily steve hasn’t had to see her when her mind makes up cruel scenarios that make her panic. that is until her brain decides to think about what would happen if she never met steve. and steve just so happens to decide to drop by her house in the midst of her panic.

warnings: anxiety attack, hurt / comfort, overthinking, getting caught up in things that could’ve happened and “what-ifs”, cursing ofc

A/N: ofc this is inspired by Dreams Tonite by Alvvays. this song always hits me so hard. also partially inspired by the line “i pass you on the street and our eyes don’t meet” from I Wish I Never Met You by Babygirl. also it’s definitely a self-indulgent fic. if you relate, i’m sorry and i hope this gives you some sort of comfort <3 it’s short but it’s sweet and i might’ve cried a couple times writing it 🧍‍♀️

word count:

For her entire life, y/n’s brain had made up scenarios to hurt her when it decided that life was going too well. She had been dating Steve Harrington for about three months now and of course he knew about her anxiety, he caught on fast to her tell-tale signs and eventually figured out how to help her calm down which she was extremely grateful for, but he didn’t exactly know about how bad it could get when she was alone at night. It didn’t happen often, but when it did, it wasn’t pretty. Sometimes her hands would get cold and she got uncontrollable shivers and have to try to focus on something else. And other times she’d start sobbing uncontrollably. Neither of which were exactly pleasant to experience or see. And she never wanted Steve to see either of them. She could see his worried expression and it’d only make her more upset. Not to mention she’d feel so dramatic and silly if she explained that the reason she was so upset was over some insane scenario that never happened.

It was 2:00am when she started to feel it. Her hands started to get cold. At first she couldn’t figure out why, and then the thoughts flooded in. What if I never got attacked by that demogorgon outside of the Wheeler house? What if Steve wasn’t there? What if he wasn’t the one with the spikey bat? What if him and Nancy hadn’t broken up? What if I decided to go home and pretend it never happened instead of joining them in their fight against the upside down? The thoughts continued to snowball until she was sobbing harder than she had in months. thinking about how different her life would be without those kids. Without Robin, Jonathan, even Nancy. Without Steve. God she didn’t wanna know what it would be like but yet here she was. Thinking about all the different paths she could’ve ended up on. All of them without Steve, who she was certain was the love of her life. Her soulmate even. She wasn’t sure how long it went on for, but next thing she knew there was a hand on her back that made her jump.

“Steve…?” She managed to croak out.

“Honey what’s going on?” He couldn’t even try to hide the concern and mild fear in his voice. You frowned even more.

“It’s... It’s nothing. Why are you here?” She tried to rapidly wipe away her tears as if she hadn’t already been caught sobbing into the stuffed animal he had gotten for her at a fair. It was an oversized platypus, which they laughed over how random it was to have, that Steve had decided to name Sir Quacksalot. Even though you were quite certain platypuses didn’t quack.

“Couldn’t sleep. Felt like something was off and I missed you. Tried to call but no one answered. I got worried and came over, and apparently I was worried for good reason.” He rubbed her back and looked down at her face. She was avoiding eye contact at all costs.

He took her face gently in his hands, “please talk to me Dove.” He loved calling her that. He claimed that if she were a bird, she would be a dove because “you’re like when they release the doves at weddings. It doesn’t really make sense, but it’s so beautiful.”

“It’s stupid. I promise I’m okay. I just got caught up in stupid what-ifs.” When she looked into his eyes, that were searching her own for an actual answer, she felt like she was going to start sobbing again. He must’ve been able to tell. He didn’t say anything, he just wrapped her in a firm yet gentle hug. Rubbing her back once again.

“You don’t have to tell me. But if you wanna talk about it, you know I’m here for you and I’d never judge you. I go through a lot of the same shit believe it or not. Getting caught up in what-ifs I mean.” He said softly into her hair.

She couldn’t hold it in. She started to cry again, “what if… What if I never got attacked by that demogorgon?”

Steve was silent for a moment before responding, “I don’t follow…”

“You wouldn’t have had to save me. We never would’ve met. If I saw you on the street, would our eyes even meet? Would I ever have you in my dreams? Or would you just be another faceless person standing in the background?”

Steve let out a short chuckle. She pulled back to look at him and furrowed her brows, starting to feel a bit hurt before he quickly explains himself, “first off, your thoughts are valid, but we’re here now and all that shit did happen and it’s not gonna change. Second, have you ever tried song writing?”

She furrowed her brows further, staring at him.

“You just basically spoke in lyrics babe.”

It took her a second to remember what you even said. But when she did, she let out a small chuckle as well and shook her head.

“Back to what you said though,” he grabbed her shoulders softly and started rubbing them up and down, “I get it. I get thinking about it too much and feeling sick. Trust me I’ve been there. Thinking about my life without you is the worst feeling I think I’ve ever experienced. And yes that does count when Nance drunkenly broke my heart in a bathroom at some assholes party.” He gave a warm smile. One that really only she ever got to see, “But, I think about how all of that stuff lead to us. Right here and right now. Yeah it’s possible that if just one thing was different, we wouldn’t be here. But each one of those things did happen, and I think about how beautiful that is. We had a one in a million chance and we made it. Isn’t that amazing?” He looked into her eyes and she could feel how heartfelt he was.

“How do you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Even after all the shit you’ve been through, you still have the ability to do… That. To look at things from a different perspective. A better perspective. You’re almost terrifyingly optimistic at times Harrington.”

He smiled at her again, “you tend to do that to me y/l/n.”

She smiled a genuine smile and he felt his heart stutter. God he loved her smiled. He never wanted to see her not smiling.

“Can you… Can you stay tonight? Please?”

She clung into him again, as if he would try to leave.

“Of course sweetheart. And ya know what? Why don’t we skip tomorrow? We’ll watch your favorite romcoms and play your favorite tapes and dance around your room till our legs feel like jelly. How’s that sound?”

She nodded quickly into his chest letting out a hum of acceptance. She didn’t need to see his face to know that he was smiling. And for the first time in a week she was excited to go sleep. She suddenly couldn’t wait for tomorrow. And she knew her fears couldn’t reach her when Steve was there to block them out. She knew he would be in her dreams tonight. And he knew she’d be in his.