#if anyone wants either of those lmk lmao

[narcissisticfelix]

neon church and florida icons for @aquariumgravelskittles :) thank you for the request!!

requests are open! | free to use if you like/reblog! | credit isn’t necessary but it is certainly appreciated <3    

[augustghosts]

Plastic Trees

Tommy Miller x Fem!reader

Ok, I’m sooo nervous to post this lmao. I’ve convinced myself that it sucks. This isn’t everyone's cup of tea so make sure you read the warnings! I did the classic me thing by wanting to get right into the story, so there isn’t much of a backstory here but I have future chapters planned (and may have already started writing them) if anyone is interested. So let me know if you enjoy and want more <3 Thank you for reading!

Word Count: 3.4k

Warning: 18+! This isn’t proof read so lmk if u spot any dire mistakes. Kidnapping duh, kind of dark!tommy i guess? Or maybe just very ooc. guns and swearing and all that typical tlou stuff. Reader is an adult, obviously. Handjob, slight voyeurism, face fucking.

This is the worst part. Night time, or at least she thought it was night time. The countdown to morning, wondering if they will even come back down. Wondering if this was the night they pack up and leave, leaving her to die alone down here. The basement was always dark, day or night. But these next few hours were the worst, it would get quiet. No footsteps or shouting. Only a few steps every now and then of whoever was up to keep watch while everyone else slept.

She knew who was on watch tonight, it must be Tommy. She knows this now, she's been down here long enough to know their patterns. She knows it’s Tommy because every hour or so the footsteps sound above her and a shadow appears at the basement door. It lingers for a while and then retreats. She wonders what he thinks, is he toying with her? Is he just trying to listen? See what she’s doing? Or, does his hand linger over the door knob, does he ever think about coming down? Does he ever think about letting her out?

She’s convinced that he does. Or maybe she’s convinced herself that to make herself feel better, either way - Tommy is different. He has softer eyes than his brother. He asks her if she’s okay, despite her answer always being something along the lines of go fuck yourself. Tommy is the only one who actually told her his name. His brother Joel, she only knows after hearing Tommy say it. All of this - Tommy looking at her sweetly and sneaking her extra food is what led to this. She's crouched at the bottom of the stairs. Tommy’s silhouette is lingering by the door. A few seconds and he retreats. His footsteps echo above her, getting quieter as he reaches the other side of the house. Her heart is hammering in her chest, her blood rushing as she steps up onto the first stair. The wood creaks under her, the same way it does when one of them walks down them. She cringes - she listens. When she hears nothing above her, she takes a chance and steps up onto the next one.

She knows the door isn’t locked. The world was years into an apocalypse, this house is run down. The closest thing they had to a lock was making her believe there was someone on the other side 24/7. And usually, there was. Until night, she guesses they think she's asleep - so they would wander around the house. They go stand by the front door instead, keeping watch.

As she ascends the steps, Tommy is above her. Leaning against the dirty kitchen counter. His gun on the old marble in front of him. Easy job, my ass, he thinks. The day he stops listening to Joel is the day he will know peace. Kidnapping someone, locking them in a basement and waiting to hand her off to a group of fuckers who are planning to do god knows what. This is not an easy job. As if to illustrate his point, a gust of wind blows over the house and it creaks. The shitty windows sound awful as the rain pounds against it. Fuck this. He wants to go home. He straightens up and swings his gun back in over his shoulder, planning to do another lap of the house as boredom takes over him.

He freezes as he hears a familiar squeak. It’s not the house this time, it’s those damn noisy basement stairs. He walks slowly, quietly - and peeks around the corner down the hallway. The door is closed. He peeks round into what used to be the living room of this house, Joel and the rest of their group are asleep on the floor and on various old couches. He’s still frozen in place, listening. Another creak echoes from the hallway. He creeps closer, obviously more stealthy than the person on the stairs. Another creak as they reach the top stair, he knows the sound is more hollow than the rest of the stairs. He dips into another room as the basement door handle begins to turn slowly. Her hesitation is obvious, the door is opened slowly - she’s slow, not wanting it to make too much of a noise.

She looks out into the hallway, holy shit - it’s empty. She can see the front door from where she’s standing. She knows the lounge is on the left, and she knows they’re all in there. She can hear the rain and wind up here too. Shit, she’s wearing a shitty pair of jeans and a t-shirt. The same thing she had been wearing since they snatched her up. She opens the door wider and takes a step out, the house is silent. Where the fuck did Tommy go? She takes a few more quiet steps, excitement building inside of her. Excitement to feel the rain and wind on her skin. Excitement to go home.

Her pathetic excitement turns to pure fear and adrenaline as she hears the familiar click of a shotgun beside her. As she passes a dark room on the right of her, a cold metal barrel is pressed to the side of her head. Her hands instinctively rise up, surrender.

“Turn around.” Tommy’s familiar voice - he’s quiet, trying not to wake the others. Her hand flexes at her side, contemplating grabbing the gun. What would she do with it? She has no fucking clue. But she’s so close to the front door.

“Don’t.” He says. “Just turn around.”

“Please, Tommy.” She tries. Her voice was shaking. He almost felt bad. She turned to look at him, face to face with the gun aimed at her head.

“Please what?” He’s still whispering. His voice was deeper than usual when he did.

“Let me go.”

“Yeah, right. Turn around.” He scoffs. Stepping out into the hallway and blocking her way. He’s much taller than her, his height is intimidating as he towers over her, crowding her back down into the basement. She takes a few steps back as he takes a few forward.

“The door is right there. You- you could let me go.” She tries to bargain as he continues to walk forwards, forcing her to walk back into the doorway.

“Oh yeah? And then what? I’m supposed to be on watch, so you escaping is my fault. Then you die out there and we don’t get paid.”

“Please i-“ She starts again, resorting back to pleading with him. She’s so worked up she forgets about the steps. Tommy stops her before she can fall backwards, his large hands reaching around her waist. He’s in charge now, he’s standing in the doorway holding her above the stairs. Blocking her exit, and if he lets go of her - she falls. She’s looking up at him, her eyes big and tearful. Fear evident on her face. Her hands are tightly gripping the front of his jacket, trying to steady herself.

“What now princess?” He says, his voice rumbles.

“Hm?” He prompts as she doesn’t reply. She’s honestly at a loss for words. She’s not sure if it’s because this is not what she planned, or wether is being so close to him like this.

“Are you gonna be good?” He asks. She hates the way her stomach stirs. She wants nothing more than to push him away. “Are you gonna go back down? You don’t have many options.”

She continues to stare at him, weighing her options. She looks at the door behind him and he smirks, an idea popping into his head. He pretends to let her go, one of his arms dropping away from her and slapping over her mouth when she almost screams - thinking he’s about to let her fall down the stairs.

He hauls her up and presses her against the wall, his hand still covering her mouth- the other one gripping her hip tightly. Her hands are still twisted into his jacket, her knuckles turning white. She’s crying now, sobbing behind his hand. Fuck, he was enjoying this.

“I’m going to ask you again.” He whispers. “Are you gonna be a good girl and go back downstairs?”

Her eyes are wide, tears hitting his hand as they fall. She nods slowly, trying to ignore the heat growing between her legs. God, she wishes she had met him in a different situation. He was so beautiful. His dark eyes bore into hers before they flickered downwards. He watches her chest heaving, he feels her eyes on his face and he knows she can feel him. His body is pressed against hers, trapping her against the wall, so he knows she can feel his cock hardening against her.

He lets go of her mouth, bringing his hand down to her throat instead. He leans in, his lips inches from hers. She can feel his breath on her lips but she doesn’t dare move. Fuck, she can’t deny that she wants him to kiss her. Would he let her go if she fucked him? She decides to take her chances. She slowly unwraps her hands from the collar of his jackets. She presses her palms against his chest, for a second he thinks she’s going to try to push him away and he prepares himself to grab her wrists. But his breathing hitches as her hands travel down his stomach and pause at the hem of his shirt.

She looks up at him with the most innocent look she can muster, she searches his eyes for any anger or resistance. He’s doing the same to her, his eyes urging her to carry on. She feels his stomach flex as she slowly lets her hands travel underneath the fabric. How long has it been since someone has touched him? It’s been a while since someone has touched her - just his hand around her neck right now is setting her on fucking fire.

His hand tightens around her throat as she unbuckles his belts and dips her hand into his jeans. Feeling him over his underwear first. Stroking him with a feather light touch. He leans in to press his mouth to her jaw, a quiet moan leaves her lips and she swears she can feel his cock twitch.

“Get on with it.” He mumbles against her skin. Trying to resist biting down into her flesh, not wanting the other guys to see any marks. The other guys - who are only around the corner. If any of them were to wake up and look over here they would see them. Fuck, that turned her on. She hates it.

She reaches into his underwear and grips him tightly. “You're not gonna be gentle with me baby?” He hisses beside her ear, she can hear the smirk in his voice, she feels his lips brushing the shell of her ear.

“What do you want me to do?” She whispers, her hand begins to move, jerking him off slowly. He smells like leather and sweat, she whimpers as her clothed tits press against his chest. His nipples are hard and aching.

“Fuck.” He moans into her ear. His hand flexes on her throat before he shocks her by letting go and straightening up. “Get on your knees.”

“Okay.” She mumbles, slowly kneeling down on the dirty floor. The floorboard creaks underneath her and they both freeze for a second. His hands stop in the middle of pushing his jeans down. They both look down the hallway and listen for a second. When they hear nothing- the house is still silent, he continues. Pulling his jeans down just enough to pull his cock out.

Tommy almost feels guilty as she kneels down in front of him. Almost. His cock is so fucking hard and aching that he can’t help himself. He reaches for the back of her head, guiding her mouth towards his length. He can’t help but think about how fucking jealous Joel would be. He’d expressed his attraction to her when they had picked her up, joking about keeping her the group they were waiting for never came.

He almost explodes as she takes his tip into her mouth, swirling her tongue around his slit. Fuck, it really had been a while. But honestly, they didn’t have time for this. Anyone could wake up at any second and all he wanted was to come down her throat. He grasps her hair at the back of her head and pushes her head down until he feels her gag around him. And she lets him. Fuck, she was perfect.

“That’s it, baby. Fuck.” He mumbles through gritted teeth. As she works up a rhythm, sucking him off as best as she can when his hand is still on the back of her head. Applying pressure to stop her from pulling completely away. Tommy is biting his fist to keep himself quiet, his other hand has a painful grip on her hair. He keeps glancing down the hallway, eventually deciding she isn’t being quick enough.

“You’re mouth is amazing, sweetheart.” He whispers as he grasps both sides of her face. He lets her pull away for a second - she knows what he’s about to do. “But, we gotta hurry up.”

He’s already close. His dick hasn’t had anything but his own hand for a long time and the sight of her allowing him to fuck her face has his balls clenching. She has her palms on his thighs, letting him hold her head and thrust in and out of her mouth at his own pace. And his own pace is a rough one. She’s still crying, but now it’s the feeling of his tip hitting the back of her throat that’s producing the tears. Him using her mouth to get off, she swears she’s never been this turned on in her life.

It’s so fucking wrong. This is one of the men who has had her locked in a basement purely for his own gain for the past couple of weeks. But as she looks up at him, his face flushed, his teeth biting down on his lip as he roughly fucks her face in a disgusting basement - she can’t help but hope he keeps her for himself. She thinks about running away with him. She thinks about him taking her away from all this, ditching his brother and their money and taking her out into the world. She thinks about how he looks pointing his gun at her, how he would look pointing it at someone else to protect her.

She moans around him at the thought, her hand coming down and pressing between her own legs - her jeans stopping her from getting herself off. Her hand eventually goes to her breast instead. Between the sight of her desperately trying to touch herself and the way she moaned around his cock, Tommy is done for. He pauses, forcing her as far down his cock as she can go as he comes down her throat. She feels every drop as it hits the back of her mouth. He pulls his cock out of her mouth but is quick to bring his fingers to her chin, forcing her mouth shut.

“Swallow it.” He says. She does as she’s told. He lets go of her chin when he feels her swallow. She practically collapses backwards, sitting in front of him and breathing heavily. He tucks himself back into his jeans before he crouches down in front of her.

“Shhh. You did good, baby.” He whispers. He caresses her cheek. She looks beautiful like this. She swears she can see the change in his face, his eyes soften and he stands up and holds out his hands. She looks from his palms to his face a few times before it clicks, oh. She takes his hands and lets him help her up. The feeling of him holding her hands making her knees feel like buckling again.

“This doesn’t mean I’m gonna let you go.” He says, his grip tightening on her hands.

“I figured.” She nods,her voice slightly hoarse. But suddenly, she feels like she doesn’t want to go. She pulls her hands from his and turns to walk down the stairs. He stops her before he can descend them with a hand on her shoulder. He backs her up against the wall again and she gasps as he slips his hand into her jeans.

“Shit, did sucking me off get you this wet?” He asks, he’s only tracing her pussy through her panties but he can feel the wet spot she’d created. He can feel the heat radiating off of her and he swears he could get hard again.

“I asked you a question.” He says when she whimpers in response.

“Y-yes.” She moans lightly as he traces her clit through the fabric.

“You want me to touch you?”

She bites back a snarky comment of you already are and just nods instead.

“Please, Tommy. Please touch me.” She asks him sweetly.

“Since you were so good for me, i guess you deserve it.” He says. He leans in closer to her face, god - he wants to kiss her. He knows it’s a bad idea but when she leans up to meet him halfway he can’t help himself. Their lips are practically touching, softly brushing against each other - a moan leaving her mouth as he presses harder on her clit, beginning to move his finger in slow, tight circles.

As he’s about to commit and push his tongue into her mouth, some fucker moves in the other room. The sound of shuffling and someone standing to their feet has him ripping his hand out from between her legs. She’s frozen in place for a second, disappointed and shocked. Tommy is picking his gun back up and whispering Go to her and it jumps her into action. She scurries down the stairs as fast as she can, not missing the way he sucks the finger that had been touching her into his mouth.

“You good, Tommy?” A male voice calls down the hall.

“Yeah. Everything is fine.” The other man looks at him standing in the basement doorway and then looks into the darkness of the basement behind him.

“Everything okay with her?” The man asks.

“Yeah.” Tommy answers. “I thought I heard her moving around. But everythings fine. She’s asleep.”

The man nods and asks: “You wanna switch?”

Tommy nods and hands his gun over. He needs a fucking nap after that. He needed to think. He watches as the man approaches the basement door. A weird protectiveness washing over him. Shit, this isn’t good. He can’t afford to have a soft spot for her. He snaps out of it and takes the man's place on the couch. The couch is dusty and creaks underneath him and he sighs. He thinks about how the people who had hired them to collect here were supposed to be arriving tomorrow.

Below him in the basement, she’s thinking about it too. As she lays down to sleep, she hopes that Tommy will save her - hopes that he won’t let it happen. That he will sweep her off of her feet and carry her away. Hours later, she’s still hoping. A few minutes ago she had been awoken by yelling and gunshots. She’d been curled up in the corner ever since. Waiting, listening. The basement door swings open and she squeezes her eyes shut as loud footsteps tumble down towards her. Honestly, maybe this was a better end than whatever the people who had hired her to be captured had in mind.

“Hey! It’s me.” Her eyes shoot open, Tommy is standing above her looking even more disheveled than he did last night. He’s breathing heavily - his words rushed.

“What’s happening?” She asks. Tommy looks back up the stairs before extending his gloved hand to her.

“Get up. We need to go. Right fucking now.”

[genericpuff]

I really can't wait to see how you write Demeter! Is she going to be the villain?

yaay it's a good day for asks! sorry because I'm about to go on ANOTHER HUGE TANGENT LMAO but I hope it answers your question thoroughly enough ! 😅 (and if it doesn't at all lmk LOL) Demeter's gonna be an interesting one. I think you already know the answer to this, but I really can't stand how she's villainized like some Mother Gothel archetype, especially when it comes to how Rachel portrays it, because everything Demeter thinks/does/says is honestly justified, try as Rachel might to make her seem like some insane overbearing 'evil' stepmother. Everything always comes back to "Demeter bad!" whereas reading her depiction of Persephone is like watching The Little Mermaid as an adult.

(it's very frustrating, to say the least LMAO)

Personally I'm gonna be going for what LO started with, but never followed up on - Demeter wants to see her daughter gain independence, but is fearful of her being taken advantage of and hurt the same way she, her "sisters", and her "mother" was (and yes, I have my own way of tackling the incest and familial labels in a way Rachel could have but didn't, I don't wanna reveal too much but it's very fun and I can't wait to explore it haha). All this is gonna affect how her relationship with her daughter plays out - it won't be exactly like the Hymn of Demeter, focusing solely on Demeter's grief, but it won't be exactly like LO either where it throws aside the purpose and messaging of the original myth entirely. All the gods are nuanced and morally problematic in their own way, and that includes Persephone and Hades.

Honestly, I think the reason why so many myth 'retellings' like LO end up being this Flanderized in their characterizations ("Demeter bad, Persephone good!" and "Zeus bad husband, Hades perfect husband!") is because there's so little material surrounding Persephone and Hades compared to all the others. While this can make it fun for having more freedom in re-interpretations, it unfortunately has the opposite effect as well where people tend to forgo the entire point of the original story so they can have some feel good cute story where Hades was some "soft" husband who did nothing wrong and Persephone was some "boss babe" icon with no nuance in between.

I see this type of fetishization of the original myth in a lot of these interpretations but especially Rachel's work. I'm not sure if "fandomification" is a word that can be used here, but I definitely get the feeling Rachel idolizes and fetishizes Greek myth the same way a lot of young Westerners often idolize and fetishize Japanese lore and content, or, more personally, Indigenous cultures (as I myself am Indigenous, specifically Mi'kmaq) - by reducing it down to its most "consumable" formats and turning it into something more 'palatable' and 'fandom-y' for modern audiences that almost comes across as pandering and demeaning to anyone looking for anything with more depth than a teaspoon (and especially to those who belong to the respective cultures being portrayed through this lens).

This isn't to say that creators have to stick to their lane when writing about other cultures or myths, but you can tell when someone hasn't done their research and is working from a very romanticized template they've built up in their heads. Rachel's, in this case, feels like it's definitely come from her time on Tumblr back in the day, when Hades x Persephone writing prompts were all the rage and people were coming up with all sorts of feel good AU content. The thing with AU prompts like that though is they're just that - prompts, memes, mere thought experiments or hypotheticals, not something that can necessarily work as an actual serious long form story unless you know what you're doing. I think creators who want to go so far as to 're-interpret' these stories through their own lens have a huge responsibility to still recognize and treat the original source material with some semblance of respect. In this regard, LO in its current state really should have stayed as a slice-of-life type series if it wanted to keep things light.

And I'm saying this entirely as someone who grew up on weeb content in the freaking West and got more into Greek myth because of LO. That's why I don't entirely chastise it, fandom-y type stories like LO can definitely help introduce people to cultures and stories they wouldn't have batted an eye at before (as I've started to detest LO over the last year, it's made for even better learning because I've had to research the original myths just to see how Rachel is misfiring on them entirely LMAO) but there comes the added responsibility of making sure you're not erasing or reducing the original material in favor of the silly cutesy stuff. It's an entry point, not the entire course! And that's a responsibility that falls both on the audience and the content's creator, IMO.

Yay, more text dumps! Sorry if a lot of that seems weirdly gatekeepy, it's def not what I'm trying to get across, just trying to voice my own frustrations with the depiction of LO's characters as best I can, I feel like a lot of it comes down to Rachel just not having done proper research and relying solely on tropes and self-fulfilling fantasies. If LO stayed as a slice-of-life thing that would have been fine, there's definitely a place for that sort of feel-good goofy storytelling, but by trying to be super ultra serious, it's tripped over its own feet because that's just not what Rachel is capable of depicting at this moment. She's trying to write a super serious story, but doesn't come across as if she actually takes it seriously by extension and it shows.

TL ; DR: Basically, we're gonna actually hone in on Demeter's trauma from the Titanomachy and how it affects her parenting style and 'controlling' tendencies, not only of Persephone, but of the community of nymphs she's fostered over the years. It's not about whether Demeter is the hero or the villain, because that would be missing the point entirely - it's about her role and experiences as a mother and leader of her community, a woman in a struggling position of power among a patriarchal system, and a mother who lost her child to that same patriarchal system, whether by choice or through forced marriage. No matter how one wishes to tell it, whether it's in tragedy or celebration, you can't have the story of Persephone and Hades without Demeter. That is the core of what I want to focus on and bring back to the retellings of Hades and Persephone.

[razzmothazz]

@homuncvlus heres the himeko guide for u >:3 gonna write it out like this cause its easier

fair warning i dont have himeko myself and I WONT HER SO BAD ACTUALLY RAGHHH SHES SO COOL I LOVE FOLLOW UP ATK CHARACTERS!!!! the actual warning is that im not good with light cones so idk how much i can help with that .....

when it comes to sets id say her best would be ashblazing, either full 4pc or 2pc with either firesmith for fire dmg bonus or musketeer/prisoner for more atk, you mostly wanna focus on her follow up attacks and triggering those. ornament id go for would b inert salsotto to boost those follow up attacks even more

for stats id build her as a regular dps focusing on atk and crit, but with some bonus speed and maybe a bit of ehr in the substats since applying burn on enemies boosts her dmg a bit, but its not that important because of her bonus ability tbh

so basically crit body, atk boots (or speed if youre going for more sub dps or can sacrifice some atk), fire dmg orb, atk rope

reading her kit makes me realize she does a lot btw. damn. i want her even more now.

for trace priority id go ult>skill>talent>basic atk, id put her talent higher but her skill is definetly gonna be used more than talent so yea good to have it high lvl

when it comes to team comps shes great with anyone that also deals fire dmg since she boosts that + gets a boost when hitting burnt enemies, having a healer is probably better than shielder for her since she also does more dmg when above 80%hp, tho if ur shield is unbreakable it works too lmao, add some support on top of that and ur set i guess! as long as you have a way to break weakness she should be good :3

hope i didnt forget to mention anything RAGHH also this guide assumes shes E0 but i can tell u if having her at E[number here] changes anything in the build or smthn tee hee idk if u have any questions just lmk i love rambling abt build ehehehehehehee

[jinkookspencil]

so.... i think i've decided to take a turn with my fics.

minors dni with this post

i think i'm staying away from writing smut. i will still write borderline smutty and suggestive things (i have sooo many of those i want to write) but it won't reach the point of them going through the whole "process" if you know what i mean. talking about s3x, the lead up, and the aftermath i'm okay with but the actual... "happening" when they "reach a certain point" is what i'd like to stay away from.

i can't explain it idk if this is a passing feeling but i've been pretty sure about this for a few months now, to the point where i'm considering doing something about my current, uploaded smuts.

the fics that would be affected are:

don't be so gentle

game night (i'd likely delete a paragraph only)

take off your glasses (this one is making me reconsider the whole decision lmao >.< so i might leave it until i figure out how to rework it i'll likely delete a huge chunk)

the only smut that will stay safe is a better grip because it's a chubby girl smut <33333

when i do write smutty things going forward they will be more in the style of:

comfortable, bare, and hungry (fluff but they're naked post-s3x)

this love (making out heavillly and his hand is in a certain place :))

no pyjamas (the fic ends suggestively after he's already making out with her and they're both turned on - might get the axe if i end up feeling even stronger about this)

i'm not sure if there's a certain etiquette, but: should i edit my fics or should i delete them entirely (& possibly reupload as a less smuttier version?) is there a "proper" way to go about it? in either case i'd make it clear (this is an edit/reupload)

i don't know when i'd do this, i have a smutty thing i want to upload (might post it for a bit then delete it or i might just leave it up since it involves curvy readers and we need more curvy reader fics) but i just thought i'd ask while it was on my mind also if u see me upload smut in the future after all this... just... respectfully.... mind ya business and remember the hold these men have over us kskjwdnjkwe

so yeah lmk please <3 sorry if this is disappointing to anyone, it's disappointing to me too, they're literally among my most popular fics but... i can't shake this feeling

also my other 2 requests wips are coming! one is done i'm just waiting a bit before uploading since i just uploaded one recently

[coolarchaeologist42069]

My internal debate about being a guest in Hawai’i and the Maui fires.

I’m debating this again in my head since the fires on Maui started. It got sparked by a TikTok and a few tumblr posts that I saw that basically said “see, this is why people shouldn’t move here, colonizers/tourists are taking away resources from people who actually need it.” I’m basically having this debate in my head over the ethics of living here, and moving here, and whether or not I’m being overly defensive/kneejerk when I see arguments like “don’t come here.” The conflict goes something like this:

Part of me knows that, at a systemic level, the system runs off of tourism money, and absolutely favors colonizers and tourists, and by moving here I’ve contributed to this and continue to do so by my presence. The resources of the islands are already strained and exploited, and these fires are evidence of that. This is all compounded by the fact that I’m white, and am protected by and made physically safe by the system in question.

However, another part of me knows that there is no ethical consumption under capitalism, and that being forced to participate in the flawed system is not the same as actively supporting the system. I did not move here to live in a pretty paradise, I moved here because I answered a request from a company that is based here that does good work, that I believe is actually contrary to the system’s interests (construction companies would not hire Archaeologists or Cultural Monitors if they didn’t have to legally). I’m not exactly in a position to go to any of the resorts or do the tours or anything like that, and try to shop local where possible.

Part of me thinks that the main problem is not the tourists themselves, but the system that misallocates resources, and that the main solution to that problem is a revolution, or at least a socialist reform (although idk if reform would solve the whole issue, but that’s another discussion). That revolution is going to have to pull from the lower, middle and upper classes in order to succeed. The latter two of those are the only two who are able to with any sort of consistency, come to Hawaii. Therefore, the argument “don’t come here” is mostly targeted at them. But, the people who don’t care about BIPOC in Hawaii won’t bother listening to that argument, because it’s made BY those same groups. This leaves the only people who would listen to this statement and not come are the people who would more than likely join in or at least support the revolution. Therefore, that argument isn’t helpful, because it actually weakens the power of the community that backs the changes that need to be made.

However, another part of me says that I don’t want to be that white guy who tells BIPOC “oh, you shouldn’t argue this way, that’s not helpful.” White moderates have said that at basically every step of the history of change in US and they have never once been correct. It’s actively harmful to say. So then, should I even bother thinking any of that revolutionary stuff I mentioned earlier would be helpful or even ethical to bring up? Am I just being reactionary because I don’t want to be perceived as a colonizer (I know I am one, it’s a rhetorical question)? Is it as black and white as “locals good, tourists bad, so don’t come here?” Do I even do good work through archaeology at all? Is the “don’t come here” argument based on isolationist xenophobia? Or is that my capitalist indoctrination telling me to ignore what BIPOC are saying??

I don’t know the answer to any of these questions and am super super torn up. Either way, I’d already planned to leave HI at some point in the next year when I can get a job on the mainland (if anyone knows anything over 24/hr lmk lmao) so it’s not as though these arguments are falling on deaf ears. But looking back on this whole part of my life, I am beginning to be unsure if it’s something I can be proud of. I think that archaeology is revolutionary action, and that building community around cultural heritage is an important boost to leftist movements. I’m going to continue to support the pro-independence movement here, even when I don’t live there anymore, but man every time I see one of those kinds of posts it makes me think and worry.

[boolger]

i was tagged by the sweet @rosieblogstuff !!<3 anyone who wants to answer this too, consider this your tag 🫡💖

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 53! Somehow, haha. Once I'm done w thesis, it will grow for sure!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

608,326 words! 😳 i stresswrite

3. What fandoms do you write for?

right now its only Macgyver(2016) and Call of Duty! I've made a marvel crossover, but not anything else. Once I'm done with uni and actually have the time to write and see shows without feeling like I should be doing other stuff, I will definitely write for more! I want to write something for stuff like Knives out, Phantom of the Opera, Star wars -- but mainly a ton of Macgyver and call of duty, lol

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? well, they've changed quite recently, since i jumped headfirst into the COD fandom and was welcomed very nicely! So, right now, theyre:

Adventures of 141's bunny (1,502 kudos😳😳)- Call of Duty

Mami's omega (448 kudos) - Call of Duty

The Heron Club (363 kudos) - Call of Duty

Warm water (150 kudos) - Macgyver

A pregnant night (144 kudos) - Macgyver

Im very grateful for each single kudos !!💖🥰

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, or I try now! It was easier when I was only in the macgyver fandom, since it is much smaller, but now in the Call of Duty fandom, i'm afraid I simply cannot keep up! So if I don’t reply to your comment, I’m sorry, I’m not trying to be rude or anything!👉👈

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

phew, that is one good question, because I honestly don't know. I have a tendency to end things either happy and hopeful like, or dark and like, with the vibe of things just being uncertain but not necersarily angsty? Lmk if im wrong lmao. I think the closest is in A dog needs a garden, but then again, its not really angsty - at least not to the characters. just... dark.🤷‍♀️

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

hm. I mean, in my two fics Sir and his good boy and my baby’s got a gun (that I struggle to read myself now bc while I do have a soft spot for them, I hate my writing lol.) I make poor Mac go through a lot of shit, and they both end up on a happy or hopeful note- so those two, I guess? For now, heh.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

mmm, not really. When I do get some questionable comments, I either just answer in a jokingly manner or ignore it. I think I've only deleted one comment, lol. 💀

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

hah, YES. what don't I write. Despite being ace and not really being interested in sex irl, I sure do write a lot of smutty smut. I mostly write kinky stuff, a lot of BDSM ones. A lot of darker stuff too. I mean, out of 53 fics I think maybe 13 ish of them doesn’t have smut in them? So yeah, I write a bunch of smut.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Well, I've only written three (so far) lol. Two of them was just... Angus Macgyver and Jack Dalton having a threesome with a character from a different fandom, LMAO. I've written them having a threesome with Bucky Barnes from marvel and then one with Simon Ghost Riley from Call of Duty. The craziest one technically isn’t a crossover lmao, more just the fact that I made twilight vampires canon in a Macgyver fic I wrote once 💀😂 it’s called this is the skin of a killer, Jack and yes, I find it funny and stupid myself.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not, lol. So no, at least not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Uh, no, again, not that I know of, lmao.👀

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Mmm, not technically, no. I don't talk often with a lot of fanfic writers, (im shy and idk how to become friends with people) but I do have 2 wonderful sweet friends I met through the macgyver fandom, whom i'm very grateful for and love lots. (They adopted my imposter ass who hadn’t even seen the show) They have managed to deal w my annoying ass for like... almost 2 years, I think and somehow isn't scared away yet. So, what I was going with that is, no, i've not co-written anything, but they do spar a lot with me and we discuss ideas and such, hehe. They've def helped me with a lot of fics.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

That is one good question that I honestly don't know the answer of. I'm pretty open to most ships, as long as they're written well in the fic or the show. (and legal. and not *ncest or pseudo *ncest.)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

don't call me out like this, I have a lot of WIPS. But honestly? Probably Wet footprints on the wooden floor (Macgyver). A part of me wants to, but its been like 1,5year or so, i think. At this point I would probably just delete it, then rewrite the entire thing and post it again, lol, because I do like the concept.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I don't know, actually. I like to think I write somewhat interesting plots whenever I'm trying not to just write pure smut. But eh, idk. I think I have an okay sense of humor too? but I am also biased.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Weird sentences! English isn't my first language, Danish is! and the structure of a sentence can be very different in Danish, so sometimes my English sentences ends up weird bc they're translated, lol. I'm working on it and I have definitely become better ver since writing my first fanfic, lol.🤷‍♀️

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I like to read it, but I struggle with writing it! It's hard, especially when you dont speak a certain language. I sometimes go with google translate, but I've tried just writing it like this when its in another language, lol. so ye, fun but hard.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Eh, i mean, I wrote a fanfic or two when I was like 15 or something, but I cannot, for the life of me, remember what for. probably marvel or twilight or something😂

If we go with the boolger account time-line, then it's Macgyver!

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

don't make me choose between my babies. So I shall cheat the system and mention some of my fav.

The many deaths of a phoenix(macgyver), since I like the plot ideas lol, even though I feel stuck with it atm.

Lovers in the garden of Eden (macgyver) (dead dove dont eat) which is def fucked up, not the worst kind I've written but still. It has a special place in my dark, f'ed up heart. 🖤

Do you think I'm broken? (macgyver) bc I tried to voice a lot of my own gender struggles through it lol.

and finally, i am a lil proud of So long as I'm your favorite toy(COD) heh.

[alwaysxlarrie]

I wanna know about twice upon a time and new luke fic?? :D

ahh yes ofc love !!!

twice upon a time / cinderella au is basically new employee harry = cinderella, evil coworkers nick grimshaw & simon cowell = evil stepsisters, evil boss james corden = evil stepmother, and prince charming = new boss louis tomlinson. nick and simon who were once friends with intern harry started stealing harry’s ideas when he became a permanent employee at their company, heavenly homes, because his ideas were always praised & they want that praise and a raise but without doing any of the hard work and they know harry’s too nice to like fuck em up for it. their current boss, james, is at best indifferent and at worst dismissive and condescending when harry tries to approach him for help/tries to point out instances when it’s happening. enter new boss louis who sees that something’s going on and wants to get to the bottom of it. harry and louis might just end up falling in love and having office sex, but who knows?¿ (i’m hoping to post chapter 1 before christmas, so if anyone’s interested in betaing it, please lmk!!)

the new luke fic is luke hemmings x OFC (it’s either muke or luke x OFC, those are the only acceptable luke ships for me LMAO) they meet at a bar, her best friend wants to see the guy she has a thing with (calum hood) performing at a local bar. luke’s best friend is — shockingly — calum hood. i haven’t sketched out more than a vague outline of the fic outside of that so far, but it’s not going to be as cliche as it sounds, i promise lmao. not that there’s anything wrong w cliches, i just don’t want this fic to be one LOL. it’ll probably be something along the lines of slow burn, enemies to lovers, domestic fluff, along with a few plot twist to keep people on their toes 😂

thank you sm for the question :)

[eyndr-stories]

Chester and the Jesters (FNAF SB fanfic) C2 - With a shnoz like that how could he NOT be nosy

In Summary:

The new tech sure does seem a little strange. Chester (at least, that's what their name tag says) doesn't seem as concerned as they should be about the high turnover rate here at Freddy Fazbear's Mega Pizza-Plex, or the numerous rumors about what happens to people who take the night shift. And to make matters worse, there seems to be some kind of criminal on the loose! The cops say they think the criminal is hiding out in the woods somewhere near the pizza-plex. Stress is high at the plex these days, but Chester is stoic as ever. Say, come to think of it, no one can seem to remember where Chester's application went or who they interviewed with. Their employee file is misplaced or missing just like everything else in this place. But the new tech does a good job completing their tasks, and has their own badge and everything, so of course they must belong here. It's not like someone would sneak into the plex and go this far out of their way to impersonate a low level technician. Right??

Things To Know (always read responsibly!):

Biggest warnings are for blood, death, knives, murder, the police, violence, also the OC is at one point hit by lightning. All fun stuff

About 70,000 words in total, 9 chapters, so roughly like. 7,500 words per chapter

This is an OC story, not a reader insert or a self insert! But if you want to imagine otherwise be my guest lol

Angst, fluff

OC x Sun & Moon, there's romance but zero spice

Occasional swearing

Heavy focus on Sun and Moon but most of the rest of the gang is there too :)

Afton doesn't exist, sorry peepaw, Vanessa is here but she's very chill. She's a kickass gamer girl lmao

Moon does an attempted murder but its fine. He's just a lil guy ok

OC uses they/them and also sign language most of the time

Impersonation, lying. There's also manipulation. Yall I wasn't kidding about the angst

There's also a lot of focus on how they're all robots, very cool robots with feelings lol

That's all I can think of, as always please lmk if I should add anything!

Ao3 Link: Right here!

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

C2 - With a shnoz like that how could he NOT be nosy

     In theory, so long as Chester was careful, everything would work out just fine. With the cops camped out at the end of the building's expansive parking lot and more patrolling the town, hiding out in Freddy Fazbear's Mega Pizza Plex was, admittedly, almost ideal.

     Almost.

     The issue with impersonating a technician, or at least someone who would pass an interview for a job as a technician, was that Chester did not know much of anything about technical equipment. It wasn't like they could ask what exactly their day to day job responsibilities were, either. So, Chester did what they did best. They were quiet, and they were observant. They sat back and watched and learned.

     Several things became clear over the day as Chester watched their coworkers hurry back and forth through access tunnels and to different parts of the complex. Firstly, their initial concern over someone noticing that they weren't doing much of anything quickly faded because the rare few others they did see were coming and going very quickly, and everyone seemed to have a list of tasks to do. These tasks, Chester learned, were assigned via small handheld devices that fit neatly into a tool belt, which everyone seemed to have.

     First order of business, find out where to get one of those tool belts.

     Chester also noted through their observances that there appeared to be one other technician manager aside from Rosa, a tall man by the name of Lance.

     Lance Baxter was in the access halls more often than anyone else, and Chester quickly realized that it was because he was absolutely riddled with anxiety and stress. He would often hide out in the tunnels, taking the longest possible route around or just stand somewhere inconspicuous and tap at his handheld device. The man looked like he hadn't slept a wink in weeks, and jumped if anyone tried to approach him a little too suddenly.

     Lance was perfect. Chester quickly formulated a plot in their mind, working out what they needed to say before getting into the mindset of someone woefully lost on their first day of the job, which wasn't actually all that difficult.

     Chester tapped Lance on the shoulder. Lance jumped, quickly putting his handheld device away as he turned to face them.

     "Excuse me sir, it's my first day and I'm a little lost. I was trying to find Daniel but I can't seem to find him anywhere," Chester signed.

     Lance followed the signs, then pushed a large pair of glasses up his nose before signing back, speaking aloud as he did. "I'm so sorry, I'm afraid Daniel quit yesterday."

     "Oh no!" Chester put a worried hand to their forehead and looked around helplessly. "I'm not sure what to do, Daniel said he would show me the ropes. I'm so sorry to bother you, but would you mind helping me out??"

     "Ohh that is quite a pickle! Yes, yes of course! I can help you. I can do that! Yes." Lance awkwardly looked around for a moment. "Um… I'm not sure what all Daniel told you. But I see you don't have a tool belt yet! So let's start there!" Lance latched onto the direction with relief.

     Much to Chester's relief as well, they ended up not having to do much of anything but look lost. Lance rambled as the two of them walked, leading the way to an employee stock room. Lance didn't question Chester at all about why they didn't already have a tool belt or one of those hand held devices. He was woefully caught up in his own anxiety, and actually apologized to Chester several times during his rambling.

     "So sorry about Daniel quitting, we've been having a really rough time of it lately. I hope you haven't been lost for too long!! The faz-phones have maps on them, it's really easy to see where you need to go. Rosa and I assign tasks as they come up. Since its your first day I'll try not to overwhelm you, don't worry!" Lance assured. "It's usually not so bad, its just that lately things have been… well, we're just short staffed is all!"

     They made it to the employee store room. Lance strode past a line of janitor carts, a table of walkie talkies set into chargers, and a shelf of heavy duty flashlights before arriving at the rack of technician toolbelts. The 'faz-phones' as Lance had called them, were lined up on a shelf, plugged into labeled chargers.

     "What's your number? The technician number Daniel assigned you?" Lance asked, looking over the row of phones.

     Chester froze. Should they make something up? Pick a number from the line of phones at random? But what if they chose one already assigned to someone else??

     "Don't worry if you can't remember! It took me a while to memorize mine, too. Here, this one isn't in use. Since its your first day it won't be any trouble to reassign your number," Lance said quickly once he'd caught sight of Chester's panicked expression.

     "Thank you," Chester signed, relieved. They accepted the faz-phone, giving it a look over while Lance made a note in his device to reassign their number later.

     "Try not to forget again though, it'll be much more difficult to reassign your number once you've got an in progress task list assigned to you," Lance warned. "You should memorize it anyways because you need it to punch in."

     "Right."

     Lance grabbed a tool belt at random for Chester and mentioned that should they loose any of the tools, replacements could be found here in a crate at the back of the room.

     "When you select a task from your list there should be an option to view it on the map. You can also pull up the map tab whenever you need. There's different types of tasks as well, electrical, repair, diagnostics, installation, etcetera. Usually we try to personalize task lists to each employee based on your profile, but with how few of us there are we kind of have to help each other out a lot. If you ever handle an animatronic repair task, the repair chamber in parts and service central can connect to your device, just plug your technician number into the computer and it'll update your faz-phone with any replacement parts you need." Lance paused. "I'm so sorry if Daniel already told you all of this! I tend to ramble from time to time." He laughed nervously.

     Chester was far from annoyed. They were deeply appreciative of Lance's rambling. "No worries."

     Lance glanced at their own phone, wincing at whatever he saw pop up on the screen. "Um, I'm so sorry, but I've got some tasks I can't reassign. If you have any questions or need anything else, you can contact me or miss Garcia through your faz-phone. Good luck with your first day, Chester!" Lance offered an apologetic smile.

     With that, Chester was alone in the room. They looked around, noting a bookshelf near the end of the room full of employee handbooks. There were several health and safety booklets, a few maps, some 'in case of emergency' booklets, and-

     Chester breathed a heavy sigh of relief. Technician booklets. Manuals and guides to the animatronics and a lot of the tech around the plex. They didn't have time to read right now, but they'd definitely be reading those over the moment they did have the time.

     The faz-phone buzzed in Chester's hand. They turned it on to find a quickly growing list of tasks. As the list kept updating, the little scroll bar on the side shrinking smaller and smaller, Chester's worry grew in kind. They navigated through the tasks, trying to find one that looked relatively easy.

     They'd be doing a lot of learning on the job, it seemed. Chester took a deep breath to steel their nerves. All they had to do was do this job well enough to not be fired. That wouldn't be too difficult, right?

~~~

     A few hours later, as Chester was elbow deep in a bumper car with an angry impatient metal wolf looming over them, they were starting to regret some of their decisions.

     As the animatronic wolf told it, she had apparently ripped the wheel of the car clean off in frustration because the last tech who serviced it hadn't aligned the wheel properly, causing the car to constantly drift to the right. Chester was having a hard time getting the base of it to sit right. It didn't seem to want to sit all the way down into the bit that connected it to the two front wheels. Chester could easily guess that the previous technician had wedged it in as far as it would go and had called it a day, since it still technically worked well enough to move the wheels left and right. Since it wasn't properly bolted in, however, it had easily worked its way loose again.

     Chester pulled the entire wheel and its connecting cylinder out of the car, figuring they'd set it in there wrong. They really didn't know what they were doing. The wolf certainly wasn't making it any easier.

     "Hurry it up! My next race starts in ten minutes!" she growled, folding her arms. The glamrocks, as Chester had learned they were called, were comprised of a complex inner working of moving metal plates and extremely durable endoskeletons. The intricacies of their impressive design meant their faces were allowed a small range of expression through the use of adjustable plates around their brows and cheeks, and their complex range of motion allowed for the conveyance of body language. And so, it was very clear to see that this particular animatronic was deeply annoyed with Chester.

     Chester huffed, doing their best to ignore the looming wolf robot, and tried to get a better look at the inside of the bumper car, to try and puzzle out how it was meant to connect. The wheel's cylinder was meant to sit in a tube connected to metal rods, which in turn connected to the wheels. As the cylinder turned the tube, the rods would be pushed or pulled in tandem, turning the wheels. Chester eyed the tube, wondering if there was a dent in it preventing the cylinder from fitting in it properly.

     There wasn't a dent, but upon close inspection Chester did find a loose screw sitting at the bottom of the tube.

     Relieved that the error wasn't a lack of knowledge on Chester's part, they quickly pulled out the screw and tried fitting the wheel's cylinder back into the tube. It clunked into place without issue. From there it was a simple matter of screwing a bolt through the tube to hold the cylinder in place. They closed the hood of the bumper car, relieved.

     Chester turned to the wolf. "That should be-"

     "Great. Outa the way." The wolf strode past Chester and climbed into the car. "I've got a race to win."

     Chester quickly moved out of the way- they were far too busy to be run over. The wolf lady sped off at once. Chester pulled up their task list and marked that particular in progress task as complete, opting not to leave any notes in the optional note box. They weren't sure if others could see their notes, and they didn't want to inadvertently give away their complete lack of knowledge. The task vanished from the list and was instantly replaced with two more.

     Chester heaved a sigh. They scrolled through the list, noting that a few tasks that had been there a while were gone now. Chester guessed that these tasks had been reassigned, or had even resolved themselves, by some miracle. They hunted through the list for something easy. There were a few 'high priority' tasks at the very top of their list. At first, Chester had been deeply intimated by these, worrying about the level of skill they might require. As they reached the end of their current tasks, however, they begrudgingly decided to at least look them over.

     …Something wasn't right here. Between two tasks labeled 'Animatronic repair' and 'Welcome area projector installation' was another high priority task labeled 'Replace lightbulb'. Chester selected the task, reading the details.

     Apparently, a light in an area the map declared 'Superstar Daycare' was out, and needed replacing. The lightbulb type was listed, and the map also helpfully listed what supply closets stored replacement bulbs. Chester accepted the task, marking it as 'in progress', and started on their way towards the nearest supply closet.

     Maybe the task had just been labeled wrong? Whatever the case, Chester was grateful for the easy fix. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, as they say.

     Chester puzzled absently over the nonsensical phrase as they made their way out of Roxy Raceway, walking along the colorfully painted far wall, vibrant orange desert canyons populated by tall cacti. What was a gift horse? Was the horse the gift? Was it considered bad luck to look at a horse in the mouth? Chester couldn't extrapolate the connection between the phrase and its intended meaning. They knew by means of gleaning implication from others that it meant to not attempt to find problems with something graciously given, but where the hell did horses fit into the picture?

     It seemed someone had the foresight to store a step ladder in the storage closet with the lightbulbs. Chester was grateful for this, they weren’t sure if they would have remembered to grab a ladder otherwise. Lightbulb and ladder acquired, Chester pulled their map back up and made their way to the daycare, storing the lightbulb in their tool belt and setting the top step of the ladder over their shoulder to free their hands. They'd been back and forth across the building enough times that they thought they should have started to get a feel for the layout, but for some reason they couldn't wrap their mind around these halls. They kept running into areas they could have sworn they'd passed, or they'd pass the exact same gift shop they would have sworn they'd seen on the other end of the building.

     Chalking it up to stress and exhaustion, Chester put it out of mind as they came at last to the daycare.

     Past a blissfully quiet check in area and down a set of stairs, Chester navigated through a collection of tables and chairs situated outside of what appeared to be the actual daycare itself. The top half of the two-story high room was enclosed with netting, reminding Chester of bird exhibits in zoos. Chester pushed open the giant double doors, which were reminiscent of a castle’s wood gate entrance. The medieval references continued inside the daycare itself. Across from jungle gyms and slides and neatly organized stacks of toys was a moat full of plastic colorful balls, little bridges leading across to a massive castle themed fort. High up beyond the reach of most average ladders was the top of a tower, decorated with chiseled foam stones and flowering vines of paint. Beyond the balcony atop this tower, a theatrically red curtain was drawn over a doorway, hiding a space beyond. The only thing here not on theme was the security desk by the door, currently unmanned.

     Chester spied a group of kids, all gathered together around plastic tables and tiny chairs. Amidst all the bright colors and surrounded by kids, Chester almost didn't notice the figure sitting with the kids until he sprang to his feet.

     "Hellooo!" the figure called. "You must be here to fix the light for us!!" The figure took a moment to check over the children, a few of whom had turned to look at Chester. The figure looked like another animatronic, but he wasn't animal themed like the others. He looked like a sun, his flat circular head encircled by seven orange triangles. He was tall and narrow, all bright oranges and reds and yellows, and clad in stripes and bells and ribbons like some sort of clown. He wore a soft bright red scarf around his pole neck.

     "Yes, I-" Chester's hands stalled as the animatronic did an honest to god cartwheel around the table he'd been sitting at before running right for them. A jolt of fear shot though them at the sight of someone barreling towards them, and before they knew what they were doing they'd crouched into a defensive stance, fists raised.

     "Woah there! Are we boxing??" The animatronic halted instantly to sign and speak in tandem, then raised his own fists. He bobbed fluidly and exaggeratively from side to side, like a character in a fighting game.

     With a brief bout of embarrassment, Chester lowered their fists and straightened back up. "I'm here to replace a lightbulb."

     "Of course!! It's right over here in the snack time area! Leave your shoes by the door and I'll show you," the bot said, spinning on his heel not a moment after quickly flashing the last sign and waving for Chester to follow. He bounded across soft padded floors.

     Chester followed, kicking off their shoes and placing them out of the way before taking quick strides to keep up. They noted some of the kids were staring after them and the animatronic, so they gave the kids a little wave. One waved back, nearly knocking a pair of star shaped sunglasses off of her face.

     The animatronic stopped in a small nook off the side of the main daycare. Above a little kitchenette surrounded by tiny tables was the faulty light in question, a dim yellowed dome sitting snug against the low ceiling.

     Chester set up their step stool under the light. The stool was the perfect height for the job, and Chester began carefully twisting the dome off.

     The animatronic was watching them carefully. Chester glanced at him, but couldn’t discern much. The bot's face was a set mold with a big pointy nose and an even bigger grin. His white eyes glowed faintly as he scrutinized Chester. His eyes lacked any discernable pupils, but it was clear he was staring at them none the less.

     “Say, did you know you seem to have picked up the wrong name tag??” the animatronic said.

     Chester froze, fighting down that panic. They struggled not to drop the dome, instead setting it down gently between their feet. Hands free, they signed at the animatronic. “I don’t know what you mean.”

     “It must have happened because you two have the same name, right? But the barcode on the back is the first Chester’s employee code!”

     Chester looked down at their stolen name badge. Apparently this bot could see the barcode on the back. Chester tried to think up some excuse, some explanation. They could have agreed with the animatronic’s assumption, laughed about the mix up, but what would happen the next time Chester met this animatronic and they still had the same name tag? When the barcode on the back was still the same, surely the bot would get suspicious.

     The animatronic went on in the face of Chester’s panicked silence, tapping a thoughtful finger on his chin. “Here we thought the first Chester had quit months ago! If you two mixed up your name tags that must mean the first Chester decided to come back? Which is funny, because the first Chester seemed to really, really want to leave really badly all the time!”

     “Chester did quit. They just… gave me the old name tag,” Chester signed quickly.

     “Oh?? How lazy, they wouldn’t even make you a new name tag!” The animatronic ‘tsk’ed.

     Chester shrugged. “We’re really short staffed, I’m sure they were busy.” They reached up and started to unscrew the old lightbulb. With one hand they continued to sign, quickly changing the subject. “So what’s your name, then?”

     “OH!! Of course, where are my manners?!” The animatronic reeled back, slapping both hands to his cheeks. “I’ve got lots of names and nicknames and they’re all just great!! Sun, Sunny, Sundrop, Sunshine, Mister Sun- take your pick!”

     “You don’t have a preference?” Chester asked. They shook the old lightbulb next to their ear. They heard the faint rattle of a dead bulb (as well as the constant ringing, which didn’t seem to be going away anytime soon) so they stored the old bulb away and began screwing in the new one.

     “Nope! I love them all!” the animatronic insisted, signs punctuated by the jingling of bells on his wrists.

     “Sun seems easy enough. Is that alright?” Chester asked.

     The animatronics' head spun a full 360 degrees as he gave Chester two thumbs up. “That’s a-ok!”

     "You don't have to sign if you don't want to, by the way. I can hear just fine," Chester mentioned.

     "Noted!" The animatronic, Sun, watched Chester work. His fingers started to fiddle with the ribbons tied around his wrist, jostling the bells tied to the ribbons. “You seem a lot nicer than the other techs! Are you going to stay for very long?”

     Chester couldn’t fathom how they’d managed to come across as nice, but they weren’t about to argue. “I’m not sure yet,” they answered honestly. They’d be around as long as the cops were still after them. With the new lightbulb securely in place, they reached down for the dome covering. “It’s my first day on the job.”

     “Only your first day??” Sun’s faceplate turned only a few degrees, mimicking a head tilt. “How’d you know about the first Chester quitting if its only your first day?”

     Chester fumbled with the dome, nearly dropping it. “I didn’t. You told me that. I made a reasonable assumption when I said that before, about them giving me Chester’s old name tag.” They focused on screwing the dome back on so they could hurry up and get out of here. This bot sure was asking a lot of questions.

     “I see! You must have been right, I can’t imagine why else you’d have Chester’s old name tag!” Sun said.

     “Okay, all done.” Chester hurriedly climbed down, folding up the step ladder and setting it over their shoulder. “Sorry for the intrusion,” they quickly signed, already heading for the door.

     “It’s no problem!! Have a nice day, goodbye!” Sun called after them.

     Chester grabbed their shoes on the way out and closed the doors to the daycare behind them, then breathed a sigh of relief. That had gotten a little too close for comfort.

     Chester got their shoes situated and hurried off, eager to put some distance between themself and the daycare. They pulled out their faz-phone, marking the task complete. They’d return the ladder to the closet they’d found it in, and then get on with their next task.

     Chester recounted the encounter in their head as they walked, making sure they hadn’t told Sun anything incriminating or conflicting. That Sun guy sure was nosy. So long as Chester avoided running into him again, they should be fine.

     Before the end of the day, Chester ran into Rosa once more. She mentioned forgetting to ask for their technician number earlier. She needed it to assign them their schedule, since the computer had wiped all those employee files, which would have allegedly contained Chester’s assigned technician number. Chester read off the number printed on the back of their faz-phone, promising to memorize it soon.

     Finally, the day was over. Chester ducked into a restroom down in the access tunnels and hid in one of the stalls to wait for the building to close for the night.

     Perched atop a toilet seat, dressed as a technician for an entertainment complex, hiding out from the authorities and living an absolute lie, Chester took a moment to think about the unfortunate directions their life had taken.

     Chester thought about karma. They were not religious, not superstitious, they didn’t even particularly believe in luck. They did believe in the possibility of such things, however. And so, they had to wonder, if their misfortune was in some way retribution for something they’d done. Some horrible mistake they’d made without even realizing the true extent of their actions. Perhaps the lack of realization was part of it, perhaps not even knowing how terribly they’d managed to hurt someone was crime enough on its own.

     Chester had never meant to hurt anyone. Of course they hadn’t. Sometimes, despite their best efforts, they wound up hurting people regardless. Sometimes it took them a while to even realize their mistakes. Maybe the realization was just around the corner, waiting to hit them over the head. Maybe this was all somehow their fault after all.

     Chester looked down at their hands. They’d washed their hands, scrubbed their fingers nearly raw.

     Even so, they could still picture the blood that had stained them a little too easily.

[ajockeynamedpod]

time to vent into the aether I guess

i am so tired of my useless cunt of a life. 33 years of FUCKING NOTHING. I’m sick of this. i don’t feel respected, anyone even remotely local blows me the fuck off. no one makes plans with me anymore. I’m a dog in a cage waiting for someone to come play with it and no one will. or they hang out with someone who actively adores my abuser/assaulter. that feels great.

The friends that live near me aren’t even always busy. I’ve told them many times “hey if you have free time lmk I’m always down to hang!!” And they say “oh yeah sure! It’s been awhile!” And then they constantly make posts about being bored on their days off with nothing to do. like…. Thanks. Thanks a lot. I’m nothing. if I had a heart attack and died these people wouldn’t even care. It’s multiple people.

I’m invisible to everyone. Even the things I’m proud of I feel like they get torn down. My love for certain characters because someone HAS to love them “better”, THERE IS NOTHING ELSE I AM GOOD AT. I am a stupid useless lump of meat with no skills and no talents. at least let me have this.

Speaking of, the fact that my comfort characters get FUCK ALL even when a big artist in the fandom does a huge release and INCLUDES EVERY CHARACTER IN THAT PART EXCEPT FOR THEM ON THEIR STICKER SHEETS AND PINS? When I know the person DOES like those characters and has posted as such before????

Or the fact that there’s NO ONE MAKES JOJOLION ANYTHING except for yasugap because I guess that’s all anyone got out of that entire 10 year long part is just The Main Guy and The Main Girl?

I have so little comfort content and it’s hard to make my own when the fibro and arthritis AND carpal tunnel are all flaring up bad and making drawing the way I do impossible right now. I hold a pencil and it feels like knives.

I’m still useless. It’s like pulling teeth to go anywhere and even then it’s only my mom. I can’t keep rotting here but I have no choice and I can’t work. I can’t even take commissions right now because of the stupid hand thing and I don’t think anyone else is going to want it. It’s not colored, it’s not beautiful, it’s a phone picture taken of a sketch on a piece of paper. Because I have no scanner and scanner apps are DOGSHIT.

I’m getting sicker and sicker. My body is in a constant state of adrenal response now which is funny because I’m also sleeping about 15 hours a day. I can’t stop being tired.

I wish I were dead but I can’t be because I’m a coward and I keep holding up hope stuff will get better. But it won’t. None of it will. I’ll be denied for disability I’m sure because I have been three separate times, even though it’s all worse now.

I don’t have income or any money of my own and my bf can’t help me anymore and I don’t wanna ask anyone. I’ve done it too much. I can’t do it anymore. People already look down oj me for it. “you’re a grown ass adult lmao” tell that to literally every part of my body that doesn’t fucking function right. I went to vocational rehab. There’s NOTHING I CAN DO. It all interferes with one disability or another. It’s the perfect storm of dogshit.

everything is breaking around me and no one cares and I never want to wake up again. i just wanna do dumb shit with salezucc and yotsusho forever because nothing else even matters anymore. but no one even cares about that anymore except like one person each. because they’re not Kakyoin or Risotto or Bruno or whatever.

fuck man. i hope I don’t wake up. everything I’ve done and tried so hard to do to get better is either not working or backfiring.

I’m gonna take my fourth nap of the day and my god do I hope I never wake up. All that would be missed is my fucking vagina at this point. all I am is a depressed sex doll with assault trauma who reopens that wound constantly.

I just don’t care enough anymore. I really don’t. I’m not even eating as much as I used to and food is such a joy for me. I can’t even bother to eat. what a fucking loser.

[alittleemo]

.

[writtenbyme-c]

Wordle Headcanons

Is this basically my first ever actual Tumblr post? After, god, almost 10 years on the site? Why yes, yes it is.

This might have been done already but idk I hope you like it anyway. This is my first time properly engaging with the fandom on social media and not just AO3 and I am Spooked lmao

Lmk in either the replies or my ask box if you have strong opinions on any of these because I always love discussing these characters !!!

***

Grantaire - Never starts with the same word, always manages to get it within three, absolutely sends Enjolras messages that border on revealing the word just to be a prick

Enjolras - Took him a whole month before he started playing because he thought it was silly, overthinks it and fails most of the time, gets really annoyed when R gets it first/quicker

Ferre - Never shares his score because he normally gets it within two and he doesn't want to deal with a grumpy Enjolras

Courf - Steals Ferre's phone to find the word, plays the word, shares his score of one, laughs at Enjolras' wrath

Feuilly - Does not have time to play it himself but helps Bahorel sometimes and gets ridiculously giddy when he guesses correctly

Bahorel - Has a twitter thread of his scores but it is heavily interspersed with meme versions, very casual player who often misses a few days

Jehan - Barely ever guesses the word because their guesses are so outlandish like 'roque' and 'krait', loves using the game to learn new words

Marius - has never lost, talks about the game as often as he can bc he's a language NERD, everyone always accuses him of cheating and he actually gets very upset by it

Cosette - her and JVJ do it together every day, mostly in the evening so she sometimes knows the word already because of the groupchat, but she refuses to cheat so on those days she suggests a starting word somewhat close to the answer and lets JVJ do the rest

Eponine - has played exactly once, lost, and has never played it again

Musichetta - doesn't play it but loves watching the chaos of the groupchat whenever Enj doesnt guess right, sometimes helps Courf because, again, chaos

Joly - has a spreadsheet of all the words used so far and has mathematically figured out the best word to use as his starting word but refuses to tell anyone what it is

Bossuet - Surprisingly good at the game, except he often makes stupid mistakes like not using the letters that are known, and for the first three weeks he was using the app not the website

Bonus:

Gavroche - when he plays he cheats, when he doesnt play he hacks into the code to mess with Enjolras

[hyunsuks-beanie]

I Love You Too, Love

Bang Chan x reader; just some good ol' tooth-rotting fluff

A/N: My first attempt at writing a real scenario lmao. Do lmk how it was❤Also, it's funny how I'm an anti-romantic to the core, but it all goes out the window when it's Chan

Coming back home at night after a long day at uni/work, you wanted nothing more than to cuddle and watch a nice movie with Chan. Your best friend had been on tour with his group, Stray Kids, for the past three months, and the daily messages and FaceTime calls were not nearly enough to stop you from missing him like crazy. The teeny tiny (or so you insisted) crush that you had on him, didn't help either. You missed his voice, his tight hugs, the way he would always listen to rant about your day, the way he would always know what to say, the way his smile would light up your day, everything. While he did try to fill the gap by still listening to your rants on a daily basis on FaceTime, it just wasn't the same without him being there in person.

Sighing, you unlock your door, expecting to be met with pitch darkness. Instead, what you saw made you drop your bag to the floor, as tears welled up in your eyes. There, standing in the middle of your living room, was Chan, your best friend, who was supposed to be away for yet another month. Not able to believe your eyes, you pinch yourself, only to realize that he is indeed there, in the flesh, smiling at you as if you mean the world to him (unbeknownst to you, you most certainly do).

"Missed me?," he asks, and you suddenly find yourself running towards him at full speed, crashing into his chest and wrapping your arms around him in the tightest hug ever. This causes Chan to slightly lose his balance, and makes him laugh heartily before placing a gentle kiss atop your head. "I missed you too, love. So so so much."

After staying like that for a solid two minutes, you finally break free, glaring up at him playfully. "Why didn't you tell me you were coming home?," You ask, trying your best to suppress your smile and appear angry. This causes him to chuckle before cheekily saying, "If I had told you, I wouldn't have been able to seen your true happiness at seeing me. If you already knew, you would probably have acted as if you're disgusted that I'm back, and we didn't want that now, did we?"

You shove his chest slightly, before finally turning your head towards the dining table, only to be met with the sight and aroma of all your favourite dishes, that Chan had apparently spent all evening trying to make. "You must be hungry. Freshen up and let's dig in, I'm starving," He says, pushing you lightly towards the bathroom. While getting changed, you finally register the fact that your heart is hammering in your chest, reminding you that the man standing in your living room means so much more to you than just your best friend.

Being away from Chan for months has made you realize that what you feel for him is much more than just a crush. You may very well be in love with him, but you're too scared to admit it because neither do you want to face rejection, nor can you bring yourself to put his career at risk. With these thoughts in mind, you finally exit the bathroom, sighing deeply to yourself.

You don't, however, notice that Chan too, is in a dilemma of his own. Before going on tour, he too, knew that he liked you. But being away from you made him realize that you are his home, and that he would much rather be with you than with anyone else. He has been planning to confess today, and has been trying to gauge your feelings ever since you came back home. Your sigh doesn't escape him, and, full of concern, he asks, "What's wrong, love? Got something on your mind? You know you can always tell me." Truth be told, he's worried and scared that you already know about his feelings, and don't reciprocate them. He fails to see your knees going week and a blush creeping up your cheeks at the nickname, and instead, all he notices is you giving him a small smile and saying, "Not at all Channie, I'm completely fine. Now let's eat up before the food goes cold."

Once you guys get a couple bites in, the awkward atmosphere starts easing once again. Chan tells you all about the tour and all the places he saw. "London was the best, but I wish you were there. You would have enjoyed the London Eye." "Well then, you'll have to take me there one day." You tell him about how life has been back in Seoul, ranting about your annoying professor/boss, and he tells you about all the small trinkets that he saw at souvenir shops that reminded him of you. "That charm bracelet was so you, I just had to buy it." "You didn't have to Chan. I don't need any gifts, having you back home is enough."

After dessert, you ask him if he'd stay the night, and he says that since he has the week off, the boys don't expect him to back at dorms until the following morning. "So.....you're staying?," You ask with a small smile tugging at your lips. He smiles back at you lovingly, and ruffles your hair before saying, "Yes love, I'm staying. Now let's watch a movie."

After picking the movie, you come back to sit on the couch next to Chan, throwing your legs across his lap. Now it's his turn to blush, but unlike him, you're not oblivious to his reddening cheeks. "Awww, is Channie blushing? Why? This isn't the first time I've thrown my legs over your lap," You chuckle, causing him to hide his face in his hands. "Yeah but, I've really missed this being away from you all this while," He smiles warmly.

The first half of the movie goes by with the both of you making random comments about it. At one particular scene where the characters are having nachos, Chan suddenly exclaims, "Salsa reminds me, the boys and I learnt a little Salsa during our time in Italy, and I really wanted to teach you some of the moves." "Me?," You ask, bewildered, causing Chan to become shy and start stuttering. "I-I m-mean if you w-want to. It's o-okay if y-you don't."

You're having a hard time trying not to melt into a puddle at his cuteness, as you force your mouth to open, and say, "No Chan, I'd love to." "Really?," He returns to his giggly self, as he gets up off the couch and extends his hand out for your to take. You smile and take his hand, and he brings you to the center of the room. "Just one sec," He says, pausing to pick the music on his phone. Once he's done, he places his phone on the table, and starts guiding you through the dance, one step at a time, with the movie being nothing more than a long-forgotten background noise. "Left foot forward, right foot backward. That's right, now dip, and come back. Now place your leg on my waist....," You both freeze at this, realizing what he just said. It's only then that you notice just how close you are to him, and the familiar feeling of your heart racing comes back. You both stare at each other, hypnotized, before your eyes flick to his lips and back up to his eyes. When he does the same, you timidly ask, "Can I kiss you?"

That's all it takes to break Chan out of his trance, as he crashes his lips onto yours, kissing you as if his life depends on it. You don't even notice that he is backing you up, until you feel your back hit the wall. His lips taste sweet and a little spicy, which you attribute to the food you had earlier. The kiss is soft but full of emotions, and even though it does seem a bit cliche, you can feel fireworks fly. The butterflies in your stomach every time you see Chan seem to have been replaced by a whole zoo, and you can't help but smile into the kiss. This causes Chan to break into a smile as well, before he gently lets go.

"I really want to keep kissing you because God have I been waiting to do that for years, but I feel like I need to get this off my chest first," He says, shy once again. "I like you, a hell lot. Actually no, screw that, I think I'm already in love with you. I've known this for a long time, but I was just scared to admit it. Being away from you during the tour made me realize that I want to be more than just 'best friends' with you. I want to call you 'mine,' and I want to be yours." "Oh Channie, you don't know how much I have wanted to hear you say that you love me too, this distance has been a wake-up call for me too, but I was just so scared of jeopardizing either our friendship, or your career. And I can't have either of those two." "Don't worry about my career, we'll find a way out love. Just say the word, say that you love me." To this, you gawk at him, before saying, "I gave you a speech on that just now, didn't I? Of course I love you." "Yeah but you didn't explicitly say that you love me, idiot. But now that you've said the right words, I legit feel like the happiest man on earth." You shove him slightly before wrapping your arms around his torso. "So, now that we've got our feelings sorted, what does that mean for us?" "Well, for starters, I think it means that my nickname for you just took on a literal meaning," Chan smirks. You pout at this, but then say, "I love you Channie." He places his chin in your head, and says, "I love you too, love."

[wearequeer-andwearehere]

do you happen to have a list of masculine-aligned identities?

Yeah, I do :D 

This is going to be quite a short list since there are like, dozens of identities lmao, but if you want to read more, here’s the link to the LGBTA wiki page for all masc identities, which is the longest list I could find! This obviously isn’t complete either, but it’s a pretty good list!

LGBTA Wiki: Masculine Gender Identities

Here are some of the ones I know of and their definitions—click the word to be directed to the LGBTA wiki page where you can read more about the identity!

Masculenby is a term for any sort of non-binary/male gender identity. It includes things such as demiboy, enboy, genderfaun, non-binary/boy bigender, and anything else. It's an overarching term for anyone in those groups, especially if one swaps between them often, uses multiple labels, or is unsure of the specifics of their identity but know they're some form of non-binary and boy.

Enboy is a term for someone who is a non-binary man. It can be used by anyone who identifies as both a man and as non-binary. It can include: multi gender people with a non-binary gender and man, gendervast people, people who are genderfluid or genderflux between non-binary and male, a male-aligned non-binary person (solarian), a neumale (neutrois male), etc.

Genderqueer male is a combination identity in which one identifies as both genderqueer and male. As a second definition, it can also be a specific identity defined as having a masculine body or base while still being genderqueer.

Genderfaun is genderfluidity that never encompasses feeling feminine. This is different from the binary gender male because its fluidity may include genders other than male and female, for example, nonbinary genders. So basically, genderfaun people are fluid between male, masculine and unaligned or nonbinary genders.

Genderfaunet is gender fluidity between male, masculine, nonbinary and feminine genders, but never 100% female. Fluid between all genders except fully female.

Boyflux is a gender identity in which a person can experience varying degrees of maleness. For example, one could feel 0% (agender), 50% (demiboy), 100% (man). The intensity can fluctuate over any period of time.

Boyflux is a form of genderfluidity and a subset of genderflux which is a term used to describe any person’s gender idenity fluctuating. Boyflux is a specific gender identity off of genderflux.

Libramasculine or libraboy is a gender in which one is mostly agender but experiences a small amount of attachment to being masculine/male. It's similar to demiboy, but is more specifically partially masculine and partially agender, with the agender part outweighing the masculine part, while demiboy is partially male, partially any other gender(s). 

Demiboy is a non-binary gender in which one is partially, but not fully, a boy or man. They may or may not identify as another gender in addition to being partially a boy. The other part of one's gender can be any gender or combination of genders, including a lack of gender.

Paraboy, also known as paramasculine or paraguy, is the male subset of paragender. Paramasculine people identify mostly as a boy/man, but not entirely. The male portion takes up 51-99% of their gender. The other 1-49% can be any gender or combination of genders, but the most commonly reported is agender. Paraboy is similar to demiboy, but it is more specific as with paraboy the boy part outweighs any other gender(s).

Boygender is a gender for those who identify with the term "boy", but reject manhood and/or feel disconnect from the term "man".

Boy+ is when one identifies completely as a boy, plus additional genders. One doesn't feel partially boy, one isn’t fluid - one is entirely a boy, plus more. One may not know specifically what the additional gender/genders are, so boy+ may be the best way to describe it. Or, one may have a lot of genders, but they all feel like they are simply additional while one's main gender is boy/man/guy/male, etc.

Boyish is an umbrella term for any sort of male-aligned, man-aligned, boy-aligned, or masculine-aligned gender. Boyish can also be an identity on its own for one who feels like they are sort of a boy, not quite a boy, not fully a boy, almost a boy, a little bit of a boy, or any other sort of variation of that could be described as boyish. 

Mascgender, also known as mascugender or manugender, is a non-binary gender that is masculine in nature. 

Mingender is an umbrella term for all genders which are masculine in nature. It can be used as an umbrella termfor any genders that are primarily related to masculinity. Mingenders may or may not also be related to manhood.

Proxvir is a gender that is strongly connected to masculinity, but in a different way to how men are connected to masculinity. Proxvir is something separate and entirely on it’s own. It may be described as a gender that is masculine aligned or mingender, but is not man aligned or miaspec, and has no connection to manhood.

That’s all the terms I know!! I hope I could help you out, and I wish you luck on your gender journey! Lmk if you have any more questions, and have a great day/night :D

[sketching-shark]

LMK fandom: Oh, what do we do about this guy who has nothing but hurt Xiaotian, tried to replace Sun Wukong and his crew, hurt Tripitaka and ordered servants to cannibalize a monkey? Oh I know! We’ll turn him into our little meow meow~ he’s so innocent and Sun Wukong is obviously the villain!

What doesn’t help is this idea is perpetuated by multiple fan fic writers and artists for some reason. Especially some aus they make that turn SWK into a bastard for the sake of the story rather than considering cultural context and thinking they should be respectful.

And almost everyone lets them get away with it just because the art or fanfic is good and they get so popular that no one can point what is actually wrong without feeling like they’re going to get attacked.

I'm starting to feel like my blog is the one anons go to specifically to vent their frustrations about the Six Eared Macaque in his lego monkey show form & the associated fandom lmao. But I guess this makes sense, as I’ve had fun quasi-dragging him before & will in fact use this anon submission as an opportunity to have my own, to put it academically, bitch fest about not just this fandom's favorite protagonist-traumatizing meow meow, but about the way villains are often treated in not just fanon, but increasingly in canon works as well. But same policy as with the last anon; I'll post my opinions below the cut, and as fandoms love to say, don’t like don't read if you don't want to see me dunking on the six eared simian & common fandom tendencies towards villains.

Oh man I would say where would you even begin with this but anon you’ve pretty much started yourself with my main gripe with a lot of ways that the Six-Eared Macaque is portrayed in fandom; there seems to be this unspoken agreement that his acts of violence towards Sun Wukong, Qi Xioatian, and Qi Xioatian’s loved ones are either to be framed as somewhat or totally justified, to be immediately forgiven/excused, or to simply & completely be ignored. Like friends maybe this is just me not seeing the proper posts but while the fandom is inundated with art and fanfics of Macaque as a generally decent individual & a true member of team good guy, I have yet to see one person address the fact that this monkey literally kidnapped & mind-controlled Xiaotian’s best friend and father figures & forced them to brutalize Xiaotian while ol’ Six Ear looked on and laughed (X_X). Like this kind of fandom villain treatment is definitely not something that’s solely at work for Monkie Kid, but it is kind of nutty how fandoms will swing between yelling that people should be allowed to like villains without even mild critique, and then will just flat-out not address the villainous behavior, and will even bend over backwards to frame even characters who committed genocide as just poor innocent widdle victims who need a hug. At its worst, I’ve even seen tons of people in a fandom get really angry at other people who don’t like a villain, and will even start accusing those people of hating real-life mentally disabled or abused individuals all because they don’t like the fandom’s favorite literal war criminal. The Monkie Kid fandom is FAR more chill & better than a lot of other fandoms I’ve come across in that regard, but that is an exceedingly low bar, & the tendency to woobify certain kinds of villains-- as with Macaque and the extreme emphasis on his bad boy/sad boy thing--is very much at work.  

 I’ve also talked before about a kind of monoculturalization of certain character interpretations and story beats in fandoms, and one of the more popular ones that seems to be applied to Macaque a lot is the “hero actually bad, villain actually good” cliche, as observable from the general fandom assumption that Mr. Six-Ears he wasn’t even slightly lying or remembering things through a rose-tinted or skewed lens when he gave his version of his and Sun Wukong’s past. Like at this point it seems the possibility that people WILL NOT even consider is that Sun Wukong never did & still doesn't care that much about the Six Eared Macaque (in JTTW they weren’t sworn brothers & in Monkie Kid the only thing the monkey king really said to Macaque before attacking him was a pretty contemptuous "Aren't you ever going to get sick of living under my shadow?," & responds to his "beloved friend" getting blown up with "You did good, bud" to Qi Xiaotian, who did the exploding), or that their original fight may in fact have mostly been instigated by Macaque. After all, to repeat what this anon summarized & what I've said before about their original JTTW context (& in an example of the things that do feel like it's often lost in translation) is that the Six Ear Macaque was a villain not just because he beat up the Tang Monk, but because he wanted to take over Sun Wukong's entire life and identity so he could have all that glory, prestige, and power for himself. To quote the macaque himself from the Anthony C. Yu translation, "I struck the T'ang monk and I took the luggage...precisely because I want to go to the West all by myself to ask Buddha for the scriptures. When I deliver them to the Land of the East, it will be my success and no one else's. Those people of the South Jambudvipa Continent will honor me then as their patriarch and my fame will last for all posterity." And in order to do this, the Six Eared Macaque had apparently made Sun Wukong's "little ones," his monkey family, his captives through either trickery or force, and gotten a number of them to take on the appearance of Tang Sanzang and the other pilgrims. It's also made clear that in very direct contrast to Sun Wukong, he doesn't care about these monkeys beyond how they might serve him. In fact, after Sha Wujing kills the monkey posing as him the Six Eared Macaque not only all but immediately replaces him with another, but also "told his little ones to have the dead monkey skinned. Then his meat was taken to be fried and served as food along with coconut and grape wines." So this monkey is not only willing to risk the lives of a lot of other monkeys for his own personal benefit, but is also a literal cannibal. And yes yes, I know a lot of people have argued that Monkie Kid shouldn't be considered a direct sequel to JTTW & that's fair enough (for example, Sun Wukong probably shouldn't be smashing anyone into a meat patty in a children's cartoon lol). And of course, it needs to be noted that there are a buttload of really out there & really cursed pieces of media based on JTTW & that were created in China. Yet the above description is the oft-ignored in the west original facet of the Six Eared Macaque's character. And it is this selfishness, entitlement, and treatment of other individuals as tools for his own self-serving ends  that is, from where I’m standing, still very much present in Monkie Kid. Like besides repeatedly going out of his way to physically and psychologically traumatize Xioatian, with the last episode Macaque seemed to be going right back to his manipulative ways. I’ve seen people frame their last conversation as Macaque softening to Xioatian a little bit, but personally that read a lot more like that common tactic among abusers where even after they’ve hurt you they’ll dangle something you want or need over your head (in Macaque’s case, the promise of desperately needed training and information about a serious looming threat), with the implication that you’ll only get it if you do what they want you to, such as, in this case, Xioatian going back to Macaque as his student even after having been so terribly hurt by this monkey, which would give Macaque power over Xiaotian and probably Sun Wukong as a result. And it is this violence and manipulation that it seems the fandom at large has tacitly decided shouldn’t even be addressed, instead leaning more towards a (and this is an exaggeration) “Six-Eared Macaque my poor meow meow Sun Wukong has always been bad & has always been wrong about literally everything” reading. 

And while it is the case that I am not Chinese and feel that as such it would be best left to someone who actually comes from that background to provide more context into how common interpretations of the Six Eared Macaque from China may clash really badly with the stuff the western fandom creates, it also must be noted that, as much as we all want to have fun in fandom & in spite of all the out-there versions of JTTW from China, we westerners should recognize that there is a very long and very ugly history of western countries stripping other cultures’ important religious and literary works for parts & mashing them into their own thing while implying or even insisting that what they present provides a true understanding of the original piece. And while I trust most individuals in regards to Monkie Kid are able to step back and think “this is a lego cartoon and not a set guide for how I should understand JTTW” (especially given the insistence that JTTW and Monkie Kid should be considered there own separate works) there does nevertheless seem to be something of a tendency to take the conclusions people come to, for example, about Sun Wukong’s characteristic in his lego form & then assume that’s just reflective to Sun Wukong as a totality. I imagine a good portion of this is due to people not reading JTTW & especially to not having easy access to solid information or answers about JTTW’s many different facets (like geez awhile ago I was trying to get a clear answer on what is considered the most accurate translation of the names of Sun Wukong’s six sworn brothers & got like 5 different responses lmao), but that tendency to take a western fandom interpretation & run with it instead of doing any background research or questioning said interpretation is still very much at play. As such, & as made prominent in the way people have been interpreting the dynamic between Sun Wukong and the Six Eared Macaque in the lego monkey show, tbh it does seem kind of shitty for western creators & audience to sometimes go really out of their way to ignore all of this original cultural & narrative context for the sake of Angst (TM) in Macaque's favor, demonizing Sun Wukong, and shipping the monkey king with his evil twin (X_X).

And speaking of which, even beyond the potential inherent creepiness & revulsion that can be inspired by this specific ship given common interpretations of the og classic's original meaning (again, it's my understanding, given both summaries of translated Chinese academic texts I've been kindly provided with, my own reading of the Anthony C. Yu translation of JTTW, & vents from a number of Chinese people I've seen on this site, that the Six-Eared Macaque is commonly interpreted in China as having originated from Sun Wukong himself as a living embodiment of his worst traits, hence why only Buddha can tell the difference between them & why the monkey king is much more slow to violence after he kills the macaque), I'd argue that in the face of all the uwu poor widdle meow meow portrayals lego show Macaque is, especially if you include JTTW's events, still in the role of “Sun Wukong but worse” as he is very much a violent & selfish creep. Like he was basically running around in JTTW wearing a Sun Wukong fursuit, but there he had the sole reason of wanting to replace Sun Wukong wholesale so he could have all the good things in the monkey king's life without actually having to work as hard for them. But if you combine that with Macaque now claiming that he used to be best friend with Sun Wukong in his pre-journey days (something that's made funny from a JTTW context given that that status actually belongs to the Demon Bull King lol), his original violence has now blown into this centuries long and really unhealthy obsession with the monkey king. Like he's apparently gone from wanting to literally be Sun Wukong to being so obsessed with getting revenge on Sun Wukong that he's got basically nothing else going on in his life. Like he's only appeared in two episodes but...does he have any friends? Any family? A career or even a hobby that DOESN'T center the monkey king? Anything at all outside of his "get revenge on and/or kill Sun Wukong/use his successor as my personal punching bag” thing? Like dude! That is extremely creepy and extremely bad for everyone all around! As I’ve said before, this seeming refusal to see beyond the past or to do something that doesn’t involve Sun Wukong in some capacity is a trait that makes Macaque an interesting and somewhat tragic villain--he even seems to be working as Sun Wukong’s reflection in a mirror darkly, with lego show Sun Wukong pretty clearly not being able to heal from his own past which is hinted to be defined by one loss after another, and with Monkie Kid even kind of having these two characters somewhat follow their JTTW characterizations in that in the latter half of the journey Sun Wukong often gets sad & starts crying in the face of what seems insurmountable odds (& Monkie Kid Sun Wukong does seem to be hiding some serious depression behind a cheerful facade), whereas the Six-Eared Macaque retains a worse version of Sun Wukong’s pre-journey characteristic of getting pissed and lashing out if things don’t go his way--but it’s also what would make any current friendship or romantic relationship between these monkeys horrific. Although to be fair even the fandom seems to recognize this in an unconscious way, in that a lot of the art & fanfic seems to swing erratically between them kissing & screaming at each other in yet another example of bog-standard fandom adulation of romanticized toxic relationships lol.  

At the end of the day, of course, this is nothing new. You'll find versions of this dynamic across a ton of fandoms and now even canonical work. And as such, I can only look at this kind of popularized relationship dynamic with a kind of resigned weariness whenever it pops up, & my frustrated question with the popularity of this kind of pairing is the exact same one that I have for a multitude of blatantly toxic villain/hero ships, given common fandom discourse & the tendency to either ignore or justify the villain's actions & demonize the hero: if you're THAT convinced that everything is the hero's fault, if you believe THAT much that the hero is the one in the wrong for the villain's pain and their subsequent actions, then why are you so set on them not only becoming a romantic pair, but framing this get-together as a good thing? Like I know we contain multitudes but that's waaay too many contradictions for me to wrap my head around. And it definitely doesn’t help that one branch of underlying reasoning behind this kind of pairing seems to be the ever-present “you break it, you fix it” mentality, where the assumption is that if you’re in a failing, abusive, and/or generally toxic relationship (platonically or romantically), if you put in enough time and effort & attempts to compromise, you’ll be able to restore/have the relationship you dreamed of, even with someone who hurt you really badly. And this assumption isn’t limited to fandom: I’d even argue that it’s everywhere in the culture, hence why a lot of people feel like they “failed” if they have to get a divorce or make the choice to leave an unhealthy friendship. Personally, I feel like people could really benefit from more stories about how it is not only the case that the people you hurt don’t owe you their forgiveness & you can still become a better and happier person without the one you hurt in your life, & that while it can be really hard it can also be a good thing to leave a relationship, even if it’s one that once meant a lot to you. 

  But in all honestly, from my own perspective this kind of pairing is starting to read far less like enemies to lovers and far more like a horrible fantasy where you can pull whatever shit you want, even on the people you "love," & never be held accountable for your terrible behavior or even have to consider that maybe you were in the wrong. It's another facet that makes me larf every time I see people insist that fandom is an inherently "transformative" or "progressive" form of storytelling like friends you are literally just taking status quo toxic monogamy & rebranding it as somehow beneficial & romantic (X_X).

But as to anon’s last frustration, it is hard to know what is the appropriate response with this kind of thing...like for my own part I’m keeping my frustrations to my blog & now increasingly to posts that you would have to click on the “read more” button to see what I have to say, but I totally get the hesitation to give even a mild critique to big names in a fandom. Like I've now seen it happen repeatedly where someone who has a big name in a fandom will make something that's kind of shitty for one reason or another, someone will message them with some version of "hey, that's kind of shitty, you shouldn't do that," and the typical response is either to blatantly ignore the issue completely, or more popularly to make a giant crying circus that seems deliberately geared towards stoking emotions on both sides of the, for example, fiction does/doesn't affect reality issue so that something that didn't even have to be that big a deal gets blown out of all proportion, with the big name often framing what often started out as a very mild critique into a long crying jag about how the initial response to their kind of shitty thing was so mean/cruel and they're just a poor innocent & that YOU'RE the true racist/sexist/bigot etc. if you don't agree with their opinion. It must of course be noted that there have also been numerous instances of people taking it too far the other way & sending not just big names but smaller creators literal deaths threats over stuff like innocuous ships which like holy hell bells people that’s a horrible thing to do. But for the big names at least, the end result of all this fighting is usually that once the dust has settled they have more attention/fame/money/power in the fandom than before, and with anyone who might have a problem with their stuff feeling afraid to voice their opinion lest they be swarmed by that person's fans. In that way fandom does often seem to increasingly be geared towards presenting an “official” fandom perspective about various facets of a piece of media instead of allowing for a multitude of interpretations, and with criticism, no matter its shape or form or how genuinely warranted it may be, being hounded out of existence. I feel like a lot of this could be made less bad if there wasn’t this constant assumption & even drive to think that a different interpretation of or criticism of your favorite work of fiction or your fanwork isn’t a direct claim that you are a thoroughly loathsome individual (& maybe also if people cultivated an enjoyment of learning things about important works from a culture outside their own, even if what you learn clashes with your own initial understandings), but I guess we’ll see if that ever happens. 

So these are my general thinks about the Six Eared Macaque’s current fandom meow meow status & some of my bigger gripes with fandom tendencies as a whole. I stand by my idea that the most interesting & beneficial route for Macaque moving forward would be a kind of “redemption without forgiveness from the ones you hurt” arc--as I think was done pretty excellently with the character Grace in Infinity Train--and if for no other reason than gosh dern this monkey really needs to cultivate some sort of identity beyond his “Sun Wukong but worse” persona. 

[1lvaites]

bc im an absolute slut for affiliated verses and ocs, below is a list of settings my ocs exist in that i’d love to write in :knife:   if you’d want to be apart of it ( can be just one or all ), pls lmk <3

ELITE LEVEL FENCING TEAM.           original.

character(s) featured:    melika osorio. universe:     modern / vague location about:     literally just a spicy fencing team that takes the best of the best. they compete internationally. they live in dorm together year-round for training and attend small classes for academics. drama................tension.............. especially once they reach the international level and more than on person from their team makes it to finals and have to compete against the other :clown: PHEW. my character melika had already gotten gold from the previous international competition and this would take place afterwards. roles:     literally anyone. teammates, rivals, competitors, coaches, reporters, etc.

SPECIAL OPERATIONS DIVISION.              semi-original.

character(s) featured:    kiet prior,  som sitwat ( @payail ) universe:    modern,   it’s just set in a world where ability users exist. the lore is heavily inspired by bungou stray dogs’s own division. the special operations division is this shady organization that works in the shadows to clean up messes and track / keep watch of ability users. there’s a sub-section of the division that operates more like a black ops group that makes people disappear. kiet and som are agents and partners within the division and they’re just Clowns.  roles:     division agents!! they can be field or in office in different sectors. other ability users that might be tracked by the division or recruited. 

MISC. VICIOUS UNIVERSE.              extended from canon.

character(s) featured:    moira dayne,  maddox lim about:     the vicious universe is a world in which people having a near death experience ( NDE ) usually results in them becoming extraordinary ( EO ), in which their powers link back to their last thought as they die.    for example,   victor vale’s last thought was about wanting the pain to stop and his power ended up being able to increase or decrease pain in others.    there’s two main players here: EO hunters and EOs   -   the EO hunters track down EOs to either kill them or keep them for experimentation.  both moira and maddox are EOs. roles:     literally anyone tbh.   EOs, hunters, etc. 

ELUSIVE AND SECRET-ISH HOTEL.          original.

character(s) featured:     ophelia wu about:     just a spicy and elite hotel that’s Super difficult to get into. it’s almost secretive but not really, it just isn’t advertised. it’s kind of like a speakeasy, you either know or you don’t. this is especially useful for those seeking refuge or running away. my character, ophelia, is placed there in WITSEC. she lives at the hotel and doesn’t ever really step outside of it. she works as an event planner and is like. Grumpy 24/7 LMAO and doesn’t care about her job really. her boyfriend works at the hotel bar ( they’re both in WITSEC together and his role is..........open :Eyes ). the hotel gives like eloise at the plaza vibes or hotel del luna ( minus death ) or hotel cortez ( mINUS DEATH ..... i mean there can be death but it’s not spn based ). i just imagine employees ( and some long term guests ) at the hotel have this weird messy found family ( family, loosely ) vibes. v dysfunctional and chaotic. roles:     EMPLOYEES ( managers, cook, cleaners, lifeguard, etc )................ guests !

ASSASSIN GUILD.         original.

character(s) featured:    sorcha dolivo,  zero seok ( @labriynths ) about:     the assassin guild sorcha and zero are a part of is called oleander & nightshade. it’s basically like this cesspool of recruited assassins working under a specific organization. they get assigned clients and jobs. the theme goes off of tarot cards and poisonous plants. what makes it spicy is that they have a code and are V good with it, until this more chaotic guild shows up. there’s a top paying client that wants an impossible job done and both guilds want them as a client........and the first guild to complete that job gets to sign them ((:  roles:     sorcha and zero are part of a six-member elite force,   so.............. :eyes: and then i would assume like six members for the chaotic messy guild.

SEQUOIA VALLEY.           original.

character(s) featured:    ilaria cortes,  damien black ( @moguui ),  caitlin dimarzo ( @teinshi ) about:     this is the world that my novel is set in for ilaria. it’s modern, but urban fantasy. it’s teen wolf but better and not white lol. anyways the location is set in sequoia valley, oregon ( used to be called redwood hallow but the town underwent severe rebranding after a massacre in the 60s ). college - centered, and the main group is enrolled in a history class focused on town origins, students will be given a group project to interview someone who’d been around during the massacre. the town has at least four dead bodies showing up yearly from “unexplained causes” and everyone is used to it at this point. a shift in the Vibes starts making the supernatural of the town experience hallucinations, loss of control, blacking out, heightened emotions / senses etc ( being vague on purpose LMAOO ) roles:     literally anyone living in the town!   peers at the college, classmates for the history class, professors, political figures, etc. i have a list of pre - established characters that would be in the novel so if ur interested in that, i can give out info on them <3

DROYI COIRE.         original w/ tas.

character(s) featured:    evie d’entença,  tyl yeo,  akllasqa mamani ( @payail ) about:     fantasy meets cyberpunk.  all magic and magic users and non-humans are deemed “bad”. civilization is split. rebel group vs the military.   all the info is in this doc that tas and i wrote up. roles:     everyone.................rebel members....... military members......... political leaders. everyone and anyone! just peruse the doc, it’ll help