#if i hear the words Skinny Vanilla one more time

[g1v3an1nch]

me in my life

[joodlepo]

Don't Get Caught / Hwang Hyunjin (18+)

Summary / The perfect vacation wouldn't exactly be complete without a little mischief, right? At least, Hyunjin thinks so. But, you might just have to see for yourself, won't you...?

Pairings / (Switch) Hwang Hyunjin + (F) Reader

Word Count / 5.2k

Warnings / Dirty Talk, Public Sex, Fingering, Creampie, Skinny-Dipping, Vanilla Sex, Fingering,

Skipping along the path of a forest stream, you couldn't stop a gentle grin from spreading across your face. The sun was shining brightly in a clear blue sky and it seemed like spring had finally arrived after what felt like months of cold weather.

A warm breeze blew through the trees as they swayed gently back and forth with the morning light, filtering down on them, making everything seem fresh and new again. It almost made you want to run out into that beautiful sunshine, just for the sheer joy of being alive!

You were still dressed in the same clothes as yesterday, but thankfully there wasn't any sign of anyone around, so far at least. You'd been walking for about an hour now, and hadn't seen anything more than some birds flying overhead or squirrels scurrying up tree branches. But, even those things didn't bother you much today; the scenery all around you was too lovely to take seriously.

"Ah... this is great," You said aloud before letting out another long sigh as your smile faded slightly. "I can see why people love going outside..."

It's not like you hated nature, exactly – it just tended to get boring very quickly when you weren't doing something else. And since most places where you could go outdoors only really offered hiking trails and such, you generally avoided them unless you needed exercise. Even then, if given a choice between running laps on a treadmill and taking a walk somewhere nice, you always went for the latter option every time.

"Right~? I'd much rather be here than stuck inside." A voice came from behind you without warning.

Startled by its sudden appearance, you jumped a little bit, and spun around to look over your shoulder. Hyunjin was standing there, smiling innocently at you while he held his hands together in front of him. His eyes twinkling with amusement as he looked directly into yours. He wore a loose fitting shorts which left his muscular legs bare, and despite the fact that it was early spring, he had no coat or jacket either. Just his usual black leather boots, dark green shirt, and brown belt.

His hair was tied back tightly against his head with several small silver pins holding it away from his forehead and neck. It reminded you somewhat of how you usually styled your own hair, except that instead of the short ponytail, you kept tucked under your hat, Hyunjin's flowed freely past both shoulders. He appeared completely unbothered by your reaction though, continuing to watch you curiously until he spoke up once more. "It's kinda weird seeing someone who hates nature actually enjoying themselves, isn't it?"

"Well yeah... I mean, I don't hate nature per se..." You shrugged lightly, trying hard to ignore the way he was looking at you. "Just... well... walking around aimlessly doesn't really do much for me..."

Hyunjin gave a slight chuckle at that comment before giving his head a quick shake. "Don't worry, I'm pretty sure everyone has their preferences."

"Yeah..." You agreed weakly, feeling a blush creep up your cheeks.

The two of you continued talking easily enough, chatting about various topics ranging from school to hobbies.

Despite having known each other for years, neither one of you ever got tired of hearing about the others life. After all, it was easy to talk to Hyunjin because he never judged you based on superficial qualities like looks or money, nor did he try to change you into someone different. In many ways, he was like an older brother figure for you; kind yet firm in his advice, and always ready to lend a helping hand whenever you needed it.

As you talked, however, you began to notice that your surroundings were changing subtly. Where there had originally been only grasslands and sparse trees, now the landscape gradually changed as you walked further inland. There were fewer shrubs growing alongside the stream now, replaced by taller plants with longer leaves and wider stems. Their pale yellow flowers stood out starkly amidst the lush greenery surrounding them.

They also seemed to have thicker trunks, and their roots stretched farther out below the soil's surface. At first glance, these plants looked similar to ones you would find near rivers or lakes, but upon closer inspection you noticed that they were quite distinctively different. Each plant grew differently, and there were even a few varieties which resembled trees in shape. One particular type of flower caught your eye, as it was unlike anything you had seen before.

"Hey, Hyunjin? What's this thing called again?" You asked, pointing towards the tall stalk sticking up above the rest of the foliage. Its stem was thick and sturdy, topped off by large clusters of tiny white blossoms.

"That's a lotus plant, I think," Hyunjin answered simply, reaching down to pluck one of the blooming petals from its stalk. He brought it up to his nose to smell it before turning to face you. "They're used mostly for medicinal purposes, especially during times of war."

Your mouth dropped open slightly at that, unable to hide your surprise. "Woah! So they heal wounds? Like, actual injuries?"

Hyunjin nodded slowly, tilting his head to the side as he watched you carefully. "Yep... and I've heard that some people use them in cooking too, although I haven't tried that myself. But yeah, apparently they taste good if prepared properly."

You smirk faintly at that. "Wow, so smart~!"

"Yeah, real charming, Y/N. Just save those crappy compliments for another time," Hyunjin teased playfully, waggling his eyebrows at you as he tossed the flower aside. "Anyway, we should probably keep moving so that we make it home before nightfall."

With another light laugh, the two of you turned around to resume walking, leaving the strange flora behind for now.

A few hours later, you sat across the table from Hyunjin in the cabin you've both rented out every year when visiting this place. It wasn't particularly fancy, just a simple wooden building set right beside the river where you could fish. As such, it didn't cost nearly as much as staying at one of the fancier hotels along the coast, but still provided you both with everything necessary for a comfortable stay.

For example, it had electricity, running water, a working toilet, and a bed big enough for three. Not to mention plenty of space outside to stretch your legs while taking in the scenery. And since you'd gotten here early, you had managed to get a private room to yourselves.

And speaking of scenery...

"You look good when you're cooking like that, you know?" You commented idly, sipping on a cup of coffee, watching him stir something in a pot over the fire.

"Didn't I say to save those compliments?" Hyunjin shot back teasingly, shaking his head as he stirred the stew he was preparing. The scent of meat and vegetables filled the air, making your stomach growl audibly.

"...Yeah, but it's true," You chuckled softly. "I can tell that you put effort into what you cook, and it shows."

"Oh please. Just 'cause I follow the recipe book doesn't mean I'm any good at cooking," Hyunjin scoffed, waving away your words dismissively. "Besides, who says I need to be amazing at it anyway? This is supposed to be a vacation after all, not a culinary competition."

"But isn't food meant to bring people together?" You countered. "It's a way to share experiences and create bonds between strangers. Isn't that part of why you come here?"

He paused, glancing sidelong at you curiously. "...Hm? And since when are you a stranger? Last time I checked, you're my annoying girlfriend, who keeps me awake half the night showering me with kisses~"

"G-Good point..." You mumbled weakly, blushing dark red as he smirked knowingly at you.

After a moment of silence, you cleared your throat awkwardly. "Sooo... how about you start serving us already then?"

The corner of Hyunjin's lips quirked upwards as he poured out two bowls full of steaming hot stew onto the plates laid out in front of you. You took yours eagerly, digging into the savory meal with relish. It tasted like heaven, the flavors blending perfectly together. As you ate, you found yourself staring dreamily at Hyunjin as he continued to serve himself, eating with a far more reserved demeanor than you did.

His cheeks flushed lightly whenever he caught your eyes, and you couldn't help but grin widely at each little interaction.

"It's delicious, but that's no surprise," You remarked casually, licking your fingers clean of the last bits of sauce clinging to them. "I just wish there was more though, I want seconds!"

Hyunjin chuckled softly at that. "Careful. You don't want a stomach ache tomorrow, do you?"

"No, of course not," You agreed quickly, raising an eyebrow at him. "Anyway, I think I'll hit the hay soon. See you in the morning?"

"Of course," Hyunjin replied easily, smiling warmly at you. "Nighty night..."

You smiled back at him, getting to your feet as you stood up. With a quick wave goodbye, you made your way upstairs towards the bedroom. After changing into pajamas and brushing your teeth, you crawled under the covers of the bed and waited patiently for sleep to take hold. Unfortunately, you weren't able to drift off quite as fast tonight. Instead, you were plagued by thoughts of Hyunjin, imagining him lying next to you in bed, snuggled close against you as he nuzzles his face into your neck.

Your heart raced with excitement, feeling flutters in the pit of your stomach as you imagined kissing those soft lips.

Eventually, however, your mind started to wander elsewhere, and eventually drifted off to sleep. Hours passed by without you realizing, until finally you woke up groggily due to the sunlight pouring through the windows. For some reason, you felt incredibly thirsty, so you decided to go downstairs to grab a glass of water before heading down to breakfast.

When you stepped out of the door, you immediately froze upon seeing the sight in front of you. There, standing tall amongst the trees surrounding the house was Hyunjin. He wore nothing but a pair of black swim trunks, his muscled chest on display as he leaned forwards slightly, stretching out his arms above his head. Even from this distance, you could see the slight sheen of sweat on his skin, making you blush bright pink at the thought of being exposed to such a view. You tried to turn around and walk away, trying desperately to hide your embarrassment, but he called out to you, causing your legs to freeze mid step.

"Morning, Y/N~!" Hyunjin greeted cheerfully. "Sleep well?"

Your cheeks burned even brighter now, turning beet red as you fidgeted nervously. "Y-Yes! Um, I slept very soundly actually."

"Mmhm, sounds good," Hyunjin hummed happily. "So, what do you want for breakfast today?"

For whatever reason, hearing him talk like that made you feel less embarrassed, probably because he sounded genuinely happy rather than mocking or condescending.

"Um, I'd like oatmeal if possible," You muttered quietly, looking down shyly. "With blueberries and honey, please."

Hyunjin nodded once, grinning broadly at you. "Gotcha!"

He turned around, walking over towards one of the tables outside where he grabbed several bowls along with a pot filled with oats, milk, sugar and various other ingredients. As he walked past you again, you couldn't help but stare at him, unable to stop yourself from doing it.

His bare shoulders were broad and strong, tapering down to a trim waist which tapered further to a set of toned thighs clad in tight black shorts. The muscles bulged underneath the fabric of his clothes, flexing ever so slightly with every movement he made. Every inch of him looked hard and defined, like a warrior ready to fight for their king.

And yet, a there was also more of a feminine part about him too. With a subtle curve to his hips, it gave him an almost hourglass figure when viewed straight on. And unlike most men, he had long hair tied behind his head in a ponytail, the silky strands falling freely to frame his face. This man is definitely attractive, you realized after watching him move gracefully across the yard, humming to himself as he prepared your food. But there's still something different between him and everyone else...

After finishing cooking your breakfast, Hyunjin came back over to you carrying two large bowls, placing one onto the table before taking another seat opposite you. You sat down gingerly, unsure whether you should eat first or simply sit here awkwardly while he did so.

In the end, you opted for the latter option.

"Here you are," Hyunjin announced, holding the spoon out towards you. "Eat up!"

You hesitantly took the bowl, staring down at the contents inside. It seemed to be mostly plain oats with only a few chunks of blueberries mixed in, topped off with small amounts of brown sugar and honey. However, there were also little bits of cinnamon sprinkled throughout the dish, adding just enough spice to make the taste more interesting.

It doesn't look bad, per se, though you would have preferred a bit stronger flavor. Still, it didn't seem that he'd poisoned you either, so maybe things wouldn't be all bad?

"Thanks," You said softly. "I'm sure I'll like it...."

"Good, then enjoy!" Hyunjin grinned brightly.

You gave him a smile in return, picking up the spoon and beginning to scoop up some of the oat mixture. When you brought it to your mouth, however, you paused. A sweet, fruity scent wafted from the food, causing your senses to come alive, making you salivate involuntarily. Your stomach grumbled loudly, demanding you feed it soon.

Slowly, you began eating, enjoying the light texture of the oatmeal against your tongue. The sweetness of the berries added a nice contrast to the savory flavors of the oats, making everything blend together into a wonderful symphony of tastes.

As you ate, you noticed Hyunjin watching you intently, his eyes glued to your lips as they moved. His gaze became increasingly intense as he watched you take bites of the meal, causing you to blush and avert your eyes.

"How does it taste?" Hyunjin asked suddenly.

"Oh, um..." You swallowed, forcing yourself to speak. "Very delicious! Thank you for preparing me something so tasty."

Hyunjin smiled warmly at your compliment. "Glad to hear it. Now hurry up and finish already, we need to get going soon."

When you finished, you stood up and helped clean up the dishes, washing them quickly by hand and stacking them neatly on top of each other.

Once done, you followed Hyunjin back outside, blinking as bright sunlight blinded your eyes. The day was surprisingly hot, beating down upon you mercilessly. Sweat dripped down your forehead, stinging as it fell into your eyes and ran its way through your lashes. Thankfully, Hyunjin had thought ahead and given you a towel, allowing you to wipe away the moisture without having to touch any part of your body.

"Alright, let's go!" Hyunjin declared cheerily, grabbing your hand and leading you towards the nearby lake.

"Wait, what?!" You exclaimed in surprise. "We're swimming now?"

"Yup!" He replied gleefully. "Come on! We don't wanna miss the fun~"

Your cheeks burned redder than usual as you stared at Hyunjin, dumbfounded. Still clutching your hands firmly in his own, he led you down the path towards the water, both of you stepping carefully until reaching the edge of the shoreline.

The forrest surrounding the area provided ample shade from the sun, meaning the heat wasn't quite so oppressive here compared to elsewhere within this forest. Even so, you could feel your skin begin to burn under the unrelenting rays. Suddenly, Hyunjin pulled you down onto the soft grass beside the lakeshore, letting you rest in the cool shade. As he settled next to you, you glanced around nervously at the trees above, wondering if anyone might see you.

"Uhm... are we even allowed to do this?" You asked timidly. "Aren't there rules about being naked outdoors?"

Hyunjin chuckled. "Nope, not really. This place isn't very popular anyway. No one will bother us unless they want to, which means no worries for you~"

His words made you relax somewhat, but you couldn't help feeling nervous nonetheless. After all, you weren't exactly accustomed to nudity, especially when others were involved. Still, it was too late to turn back now, so you forced yourself to calm down, reminding yourself that there wasn't anything wrong with showing off your body. And besides, you knew how handsome Hyunjin looked. Surely everyone else must realize that as well, right?

"... Alright then," You murmured quietly. "Let's just hope no one comes along who doesn't know how attractive you are..."

He laughed lightly at your comment. "Damn, again with the compliments? Keep that up and I may start thinking you're flirting with me or something..."

With those parting words, Hyunjin stripped out of his swim trunks and tossed them aside carelessly, before diving straight into the lake. The splashing sound caused you to jump slightly in surprise, but you managed to compose yourself quickly enough.

"H-Hey, wait for me!" You called after him, waving frantically. "Don't leave me behind!"

Hyunjin turned around to give you an amused grin, his long hair flowing freely across his shoulders. It seemed to glisten beautifully in the hot sunlight, catching your eye as he swam over to you. With a mischievous smirk, he reached forward and grabbed hold of your arm.

"Well? Are you coming in?" He teased gently.

Despite wanting nothing more than to stay where you were, you found yourself unable to refuse Hyunjin's request. Taking off your own clothes, you dived headfirst into the water, gasping loudly as cold liquid rushed past your ears. It took some time for you to adjust to the temperature of the water, but once you did, you started swimming alongside Hyunjin, giggling as the current pushed you forwards.

Soon, you began moving faster, kicking your legs rapidly beneath the surface of the water.

When you finally came up for air again, you gasped happily, wiping droplets of water from your face. But, your soon breath caught in your throat however, when you saw Hyunjin standing proudly back near the shoreline. He was still very much nude, his pale skin glowing brightly against the backdrop of the sun. His muscles rippled with every movement, making them look like smooth stone sculptures carved directly out of flesh. Each inch of his body was toned and defined, looking almost inhuman in their perfection.

You blushed hotly at the sight, staring wide eyed at the gorgeous man before you.

"Y/N, I can see you staring from here~! Stop ogling already!" Hyunjin shouted playfully, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Unable to respond, you merely swim back towards him, stopping only when you were close enough to reach out and take hold of his wrist. When you did, Hyunjin gave you another teasing smile, his fingers curving around yours. He then slowly pulled you out of the water, helping you stand up on the ground.

Your naked form shivered slightly in the hot weather, causing you to cling tightly to Hyunjin's shoulder. Thankfully, the wetness between your thighs had been cooled by the water, so the sensation felt pleasant rather than uncomfortable. As soon as you stood upright though, Hyunjin let go of your hand. Instead, grabbing you roughly and pulling you flush against his chest. One of his arms wrapped itself possessively around your waist, holding you securely while the other slid down to cup your ass, squeezing it firmly.

"See? Skinny dipping is fun, isn't it?" Hyunjin smirked smugly.

"Mngh..." You grunted softly, biting your lip. "Y-Yeah."

There was certainly truth to what he said; skinny dipping was indeed fun. But perhaps because you'd never done it before, the experience also felt different somehow. A part of you still wanted to be modest, despite knowing full well that nobody could possibly see you through the trees surrounding the lakeshore.

The thought alone left you feeling embarrassed, prompting you to lean away from Hyunjin's touch. However, the moment you moved, he tightened his grip and brought his lips down onto yours.

"Aww, don't worry~" Hyunjin cooed softly, nuzzling your cheek affectionately. "No one can see us... We're safe."

Before you could object, Hyunjin kissed you again, but more deeply this time. At first, your mind reeled with confusion and shock – until suddenly, everything melted away. All thoughts vanished as your body grew tingly, melting together under his kiss. Every nerve ending in your body became alive and responsive, sending delicious warmth throughout your entire being. And all the while, Hyunjin continued to press his naked body closer and tighter against you, deepening the passionate kiss even further. As if sensing this, you moaned softly into his mouth, wrapping your own hands around his neck.

His tongue slipped inside your parted lips, tasting sweet and tangy on your tongue. The sensation made your knees grow weak, causing you to stumble backwards slightly. Hyunjin didn't stop kissing you, instead guiding you deeper into the shade of the tree beside him. There, he pressed you up against a large boulder, pinning both of your wrists above your head.

Without hesitation, he leaned down and captured your lips yet again. This time however, the kiss went much longer, lasting several minutes before finally coming to an end.

Breathless, you looked up into his eyes. They shone brilliantly in the morning light, sparkling like diamonds. For the briefest of moments, you wondered how anyone could ever get tired of such beauty. Suddenly, Hyunjin shifted his gaze downwards. His expression darkened considerably, taking on a predatory quality unlike anything else. Your breasts bounced lightly against the calming breeze, giving him ample opportunity to stare hungrily at your cleavage.

"Those look really nice..." Hyunjin mused quietly, reaching up to grab your right breast.

With surprising strength, he lifted your boob upwards, pressing its softness against his large palm. It was hard to tell due to the lack of clothing, but judging by the way his hand squeezed and groped, it seemed like your nipple was getting quite aroused too.

"Ahhh..." You whimpered, squirming slightly as he fondled your sensitive tit.

Hyunjin grinned darkly at this reaction, shifting his attention to your other side. He grabbed your left breast just as forcefully, squeezing it roughly in his strong fist. With each passing second, more moisture began seeping from your sex.

"Hmhm... So cute," Hyunjin murmured approvingly, stroking his thumb across your erect nipple. "I'm glad we came out here today~"

"M-Me too..." You replied breathlessly.

He smiled knowingly, before taking one of your nipples into his mouth. Despite having seen it plenty of times prior, watching, him suckle on your breast sent delightful sensations coursing through your veins. To make things worse, his plush lips were coated with saliva, making them slippery and smooth.

You groaned loudly, arching your back as his talented tongue swirled around the tip. In response, Hyunjin sucked harder, drawing more liquid from within. Soon, your whole breast was glistening with a thin sheen of perspiration, which he lapped up eagerly.

After sucking for another minute or two, Hyunjin released your from his warm cavern, licking his lips clean. Then, he reached down to slide his fingers along your inner thigh. Before you knew what was happening, he pushed two long digits inside your dripping slit.

"Nng!" You cried out involuntarily, jerking forwards slightly. "Guh... Ahh..."

It took some effort not to moan audibly, especially when he started moving his fingers slowly. Your hips buckled instinctively, forcing him to hold your legs apart. However, he kept thrusting his finger in and out without pause, allowing you little chance to recover. Within seconds, your breathing had grown ragged once again, only adding to the pleasure building deep within your core.

"W-Wait! I'm gonna c-cum soon!" You gasped, struggling beneath his weight.

But rather than stopping, Hyunjin simply gripped your waist tightly, holding you steady. That wasn't enough to deter him though – after all, you couldn't exactly run away now. Instead, he merely increased the speed of his movements, driving his thick digit into your needy pussy over and over again. As always, your climax hit you almost instantly, sending jolts of pleasure shooting through every inch of your body. Each successive wave of bliss caused your muscles to spasm uncontrollably, leaving you unable to move.

And despite that, Hyunjin still relentlessly pounded his finger into your wet depths. Until finally, he felt something stir within you. A warm pressure built up quickly, growing larger and hotter with each passing moment. Just as you thought it might burst forth, he withdrew his slickened digits from between your thighs. The sight alone was enough to send waves of arousal rushing through your loins.

"Geez, did you cum already?" Hyunjin chuckled, looking down at your flushed face.

The sudden shift in mood made your cheeks flush bright red, prompting you to stammer: "...Y-Yes."

"Oh good, because I'd be seriously insulted if you hadn't," He smirked, releasing your wrists from above your head. "Now then, since we're both horny right now, should I take the lead? Or do you want me to go first?"

Hyunjin words set off an unexpected chain of events. What started as a simple question suddenly became so much more; and with no time to think about it, you answered with very few words.

"L-Let me..."

Without even realizing it yourself, your voice grew hoarse as you spoke those two syllables. Not waiting for any further explanation, Hyunjin quickly spread himself open wide, revealing his swollen cockhead. As expected, he was completely engorged and leaking copious amounts of precum onto the grass below.

"Mn... Looks like you really are turned on, aren't you?" You whispered softly, reaching out towards him.

His shaft twitched upon hearing your comment, causing droplets of clear fluid to splatter on the ground. His eyes widened briefly, before returning their focus to yours. They burned with desire, urging you to continue.

"Duh~" Hyunjin said playfully, pushing your hands aside. "But, if you gonna dominate me, do it by fucking my brains out. Not playing with my dick, Y/N..."

Your cheeks reddened, but you nodded anyway. After all, there was no point denying your desires anymore. It wouldn't change anything either way. All that mattered was how far you could push things, until they inevitably collapsed under their own weight...

And so, your trembling hand grasped Hyunjin's pulsating length firmly in place.

With a soft gasp, you place yourself atop him, straddling his lap. His large frame swallowed you easily, leaving just enough space between you that you didn't feel suffocated. But more importantly, he fit perfectly against your crotch, providing ample friction while also keeping you close. With that done, you leaned forward slightly, planting your palms on his chest. From here, you were able to control your motions, guiding Hyunjin deeper into your welcoming folds. Though the angle was awkward, you managed to find your rhythm fairly quickly, pumping him gently inside of you.

"...How's that?" You asked breathlessly, staring intently at his handsome features.

"It's passable, but don't expect too m-much," He replied with a smirk, clearly enjoying this new role reversal. "You can do better than that, Y/N..."

Despite his teasing words, his expression remained serious throughout. In fact, his gaze seemed to burn with lust, making you wonder why he wanted to talk at all. Perhaps it wasn't such a bad idea after all, seeing as how he had yet to fully give in to his baser instincts.

That being said, you couldn't deny that your pace was slow. Sooner or later, Hyunjin would get tired of watching. And once that happened, he'd probably make some excuse to end this little game. Then again, maybe not. If you played your cards right, you might actually coax him into letting loose. That is, assuming you knew what you were doing. Deciding to test your hypothesis, you slowed down ever so slightly, eliciting a sharp grunt from Hyunjin.

However, rather than chastising you for failing, he simply continued moving his hips back and forth beneath you. This allowed you to regain your footing, allowing you to move faster without having to worry about slipping.

As the tempo increased, Hyunjin's breathing quickened alongside yours. Each thrust sent ripples radiating outward across your sensitive flesh, only heightening the sensations coursing through your body. Meanwhile, Hyunjin let out several lewd grunts every few seconds, adding another layer of heat to the situation.

"S-Shit, I can't take this much longer!" Hyunjin cried out loudly, his voice echoing throughout the forest.

Those last few words gave you pause for thought. While you weren't sure if he meant them literally, there was no harm in trying to oblige. Thus, you shifted your position slightly, tilting your pelvis upwards. The result was immediate, as Hyunjin bucked wildly beneath you, slamming his hips up and down in a desperate attempt to reach release.

However, despite his efforts, it soon became obvious that he wasn't going to achieve orgasm anytime soon. At least, not unless you took matters into your own hands. So, with renewed vigor, you sped up your movements, pounding Hyunjin's thick rod into your slick depths. By now, both of your bodies were coated in sweat, which only served to increase the intensity.

After several minutes of hard work, you felt Hyunjin begin to tense up.

A moment later, he released a loud cry of ecstasy, shooting rope after rope deep within your tight pussy. Your insides clenched tightly around him each time his hot load gushed inside, causing your muscles to spasm uncontrollably. The pleasure was almost too intense, prompting you to stop moving altogether. Instead, you clung desperately onto his broad shoulders, burying your face against the side of his neck. There, you closed your eyes and savored the sensation coursing through your entire body. Even when his climax subsided, you stayed buried in his lap, prolonging the experience as long as possible.

Eventually though, reality caught up with you, forcing you to pull away from Hyunjin's sweaty form.

"Mmph." Hyunjin groaned softly, catching his breath.

"Too much? Sorry, I'll try to be gentler next time," You apologized sheepishly, earning an amused chuckle from Hyunjin.

"Nah, I'm fine, really," He reassured you with a wink before leaning over to plant a kiss upon your lips. "But I think we should head back now, don't you think?"

"Y-Yeah, I guess so..." You murmured quietly, glancing toward the sky.

It looked like it would start raining any minute now, meaning that you needed to hurry along. You stood up and offered a hand to Hyunjin, which he gladly accepted, rising slowly to his feet. Standing upright, he turned to look at you, taking a good measure of your flushed cheeks and swollen thighs. After giving you one more lingering glance, he then proceeded to walk ahead of you.

[flauerpauer]

september 2022

I miss you. I was almost sure that knowing when you come back will make it easier but now that I get to count those days down, the times feels as if it slowed down. I am going to feel your warmth on friday, next week - and that isn't long.

Today is the 1st of September, the doorway to autumn. Which I adore - but - it's more of a love hate relationship. It feels good to be able to enjoy the crops that the summer sun helped sweeten and it feels nice to get cozy with a blanket and a cup of tea, while the leaves change their colors, days get shorter and home feels like the place to be. But September can still carry those surprisingly warm days and we tend to squeeze the last juices out of it by going out and enjoying ourselves in the forest or by the lake.

Rowland E. Robinson ( a farmer, author and artist) wrote "September days have the warmth of summer in their briefer hours, but in their lengthening evenings a prophetic breath of autumn.”

That combination sounds like a perfect blend if you want to paint a picture of the ever-changing nature. There are people that really know their way around words and with those they're able to create a whole different world, or at least - perspective.

And I feel like I have been running away from that beautiful world, because school kept on proving to me that I do not understand it, the way it should be understood. However now I had the chance to miss literature and I really do. I miss it because I miss you. And when you are next to me I show you my love with gestures and physical touch and small gifts and words. But now that you are far away and we do not have the chance to hear each other's voices too much there are only words. Written, not spoken.

On top of that the thing about love is that it is romantic. Our love is greatly romantic. Being able to write about it is truly romantic. Even more romantic than heart shaped Katjes - just ate it - but I would give it to you if you were here. But what I am trying to do here is write you a longer message instead of sending 20 messages about any minor event happening to me during my day. I would rather be overwhelming with a love-letter format. That's romantic. And so is autumn.

I dislike August. Yesterday I thought it was mainly because I miss the flowers of May and the lush gardens of June. Today I realized another reason must be because of you leaving. To confirm my new theory: I really enjoyed last August, when we started learning to know each other and could not resist the tension and the heat of the moment. It feels so good to be intimate with You. You make love feel romantic.

And I want to spend this autumn learning how to be romantic together. And despite the fact that we live together, we are still good at it. I feel like being romantic is being mindful, being mindful keeps my mind healthy and makes the love feel full. Being mindful about love drags it out of the routine. One of my worries about love was that I was afraid that love is just being used to someone, but apparently it is how it looked like in my previous relationship. You taught me love and you made me feel true love, which is why I want to show you how much I love you through being mindful together.

So we can be mindful and romantic. Reading books or poems for each other, picking some apples and baking an apple pie (which we could later devour with vanilla ice cream). Or sleeping in a tent on a rainy night, going on a mushroom hunt and painting with water colors. The making a mushroom feast. And going on a bicycle trip with our dog, skinny dipping in the lake. Dancing on a festival and then exploring our bodies in the tent to keep us warm on those cold nights. Listening to jazz and drinking some wine in the comfort of our room. And making our own autumn playlist. Or getting a warm chocolate out on a walk around a park right as the seasons change. We can hold hands or you can have your head in my lap while we watch Howl's Moving Castle. And I would love to hear you play on your guitar and sing while we sit by the fire. I really want to go to an apple orchard. And a pumpkin patch. Then we could make a pumpkin pie and some warming pumpkin soup. And we could carve in pumpkins together. Or get snacks and binge watch all of Harry Potter, like we did last autumn. I want to wear big sweaters with you and give you a kiss on the cheek. And those are the things that I would really love to do. But I wouldn't want to do them without You.

I am looking forward to seeing you. In fact I am so excited that I can not sleep at night without waking up at least twice. I want to provide you with comfort during the upcoming time and I also need your comfort. You are my home and I really miss home right now. I appreciate all of you so fucking much. I love you with all of my heart's capacity. But I am trying to expand it to love you even more.

[ilyuu]

another day. (commission iv.)

the bell above the doorframe chimes, signaling a customer’s leave.

“sheesh.”

yui sighs into the palm of their hands, the only source of sanity found in the lines and scars. the smile they wore just another facade amid facades, fading as easily as it came on - it’s more peeved than anything.

“you can do everything right and there’ll still be some people who’ll say it isn’t right despite it being their own order. the receipt was in their damn hand too.”

heavy coffee beans and vanilla clings onto them like a lover, never whisked or fading away with the hours that kept crawling. of course it’s just one of those days.

right now,

“here.”

“oh, thanks.”

a small cup of tea, nothing like the ones in fontaine, yet just as delicately-scented, is placed before their eyes. said gaze moves over to the person over their shoulder - it’s ei. “another one of those type of customers, yes?”

her eyes drifts over to the door, a subtle frown on their face that didn’t seem to fit her.

“yup.” yui picks up the cup and swirls it around just lightly so it wouldn’t spill, the teabag swaying side to side. “eh, at that point, people just like to be angry for the heck of it.”

“is that so?”

“there won’t always be decent customers, although they’re the majority.” they tilt the cup to their lips and hums at the sudden surge of energy - it’s leaning towards bitterness, just the way they like it.

“there’d be ones with the most specific orders, ones who are in the bad mood and think it’s justified to throw it at the cashier who’s just trying to get to their next check, creepy ones, others that think you’re trying to scam you because of the total price, and, uh, so on.”

“you speak from experience.” ei comes a bit closer, standing beside yui. even as the latter isn’t looking at her, they can hear the quiet curiosity in her voice. they find that cute.

“that’s because i’ve been working something similar to this for a few months now, that’s— ah.”

“what is it?”

“…i’ve been talking way too much.” yui takes another sip that has the tea half-way empty, as if trying to stop themselves with that break.

“is that a problem for you? if so, then i apologize for inciting that.”

“no, no, not like it’s a problem and all, i— uh… well, wonder if it’s just a bit annoying, y’know?”

“hm. it is not. as you said to me the other day, i find you talking about such small things… quite remarkable and refreshing.” her brows furrow once again, this time for trying to find the words that’ll be able to convey what she’s feeling. she isn’t used to it.

“it gives me both a new view to admire as well as to look into, as well as it proves informational to me - for i realized then to now that i know little to nothing when it comes to you.”

“oh.” they feel a slight warmth in their cheeks. “oh. uh, then again, it’s not exactly like i talk about myself all that much so—”

“only when not prompted, i’ve noticed.” ei lifts her hand over theirs, hesitant for just a moment, before setting it atop. yui feels that warmth again. “that is why i’d like to start to if that is not too forward of me, of course.”

“no, that’s alri—”

the bell chimes again. ei takes her hand away quicker than a lightning crackling against the skies, and yui do the same. the surprise on their face smoothens into a smile, just polite enough to make the newly arrive customer feel at ease (at least, that’s what yui likes to think.)

“hi, what can i get for you?”

“a grande, please, iced, and 2% coconut milk alongside with 4% oat milk, no dairy for me, bone dry, chai tea as well. with that, a small skinny latte, extra foam, soy and almond, with those pumpkin spices atop and—”

neat. yui attempts to write it all down as quickly as they can, knowing that they’ll rue it over later when they can’t read their messy handwriting.

just another day. that’s fine.

[thegremlincrowsnest]

This is my addition to the Coming This Summer Collab by Tteokdoroki

All reader inserts are poc, chubby and ftm! All reader inserts will use he/him and they/them pronouns unlessed specified! 

CW: pussy, vaginal sex, very vanilla in all honesty

Desire to us 

Was like a double death

Swift dying

Kento Nanami does not want to go to the beach. He would love to stay inside and bake his bread in peace. But he can never say no to Yuji, and he wanted to make sure Gojo doesn’t corrupt the young pink-haired boy. Now here he is, standing with Gojo and his three students looking for some acquaintance of Gojo’s. Suddenly, as his eyes scan across the semi crowded beach, he sees...

You. 

Radiating like fresh amber in the summer sun, skin so warm and inviting. Kento watches you climb out of the ocean, resembling the birth of Aphrodite with how your braids draped over your chest. He watches the beads of water travel over the valley of your buxom form and disappear into your swimsuit. Oh, how he wants to taste the salt off your skin and the sweetness of your- 

“Nanamin!” A voice yelled. 

The voice shakes Kento of his growing erotic thoughts and he jumps, turning to Yuji and Gojo. The former wears a concerned look while the latter has the most devilish of grins. 

“I see you found him, Kento~,” Gojo says as he drapes an arm over Kento’s shoulder. 

“He’s a pretty little thing, ain’t he,” Gojo whispers, “lucky man, Kento, I can’t imagine how tight that pussy must be”

Before he can threaten the snow haired pervert, he’s being pushed towards a cabana. Inside, he can finally take in the Adonis that has captured him. There standing in the shade - you, his partner of years that he hasn’t seen in months. 

Of our mingled breath,

Evaporation

Of an unknown strange perfume

Your smile rivals the beauty of the harvest moon. He can’t hear anything as Gojo and the teenagers speak to you; he is still absorbed in how you look.  It has been so long, he now worries if his last memories of you two together have faded in accuracy. 

His body is on fire with how you drink him in. Umber eyes - that he swore could hold the secrets to the universe in them - rake over his body. You’re just as parched from the time apart; your thighs press together as you remember the last time. 

“Oh Kento, you look like you’re burning up!” you exclaim as you take a cold water bottle from a cooler and bring it to his face. Kento is suddenly very aware of how close you are and of the snitch that exposed his current thoughts. Cock strained against his swim trunks, he silently thanks you for the save. The smell of shea butter and frankincense fills his senses as he looks down at you. Your breasts are barely contained in your suit, and he admires the swell of your hips and thighs. He wants to sink his fingers into them, feel the warmth of your freshly sun kissed skin as he devours you.  

Yuji is about to walk over before Gojo steps in. 

“Let’s go, children! Nanamin will be in good hands,” he rambles as he pushes the students out of the cabana before sending a wink your way. 

You both let out a small laugh before hugging each other. You bury your faces in each other, just happy to be in each other’s arms. Pulling back, he holds your face in his hands, rubbing the apples of your cheeks. He can’t help the small smile that graces his features. Your brows furrow as you look up at him.

 “Kento...is everything ok?”

“I’m sorry, I just keep getting lost in your eyes. They hold the universe in them,” he mutters to himself, forgetting he isn’t just saying it in his head. Your face heats, you press your thighs together as you feel the smooth baritone of his voice strike through you. You chuckle and pull him over to lay down, placing a cold towel on his forehead. 

“I think you’re overheating, Kento” 

You pat another cold cloth on his cheeks, neck, and chest, and you both relax into a comfortable silence. 

“You don’t have to stay, I’ll be fine.” 

“So you can get another eye full of me soaking wet.” 

    By nightfall, Kento had pulled together enough courage to ask you to take a walk with him. The moon is full, shining bright against the ocean and illuminating the beach just enough, framing you as you enjoy each other’s company in light of the moon and stars. Eventually you decide to try and push the limits gently. 

“Have you ever gone skinny dipping?” 

    Before he can get a word out, you strip yourself of your bathing suit, and you smile up at him before walking towards the water. 

“Come on Kento~ Play with me,” you coo as you walk about waist deep. Watching as Kento also strips of his clothing, you giggle as he gently folds them before turning to you. Your breath catches in your throat as you see him bare. With his fair skin illuminated by the moonlight, you try to calm yourself at the sight of scars and muscle. As he walks closer to you, you move back, giggling as you dive into the ocean, teasing him to catch you. This only lasts for a moment before his large, scared hands grab your waist. Pulling your back against his chest, he whispers; “I’ve got you” 

Deep baritone vibrations fill your ears, causing you to whimper softly. 

    He chuckles as he lets his hands roam your front gently. 

“May I?” he asks. You quickly nod, whining a soft “yes” as he grips your breast. He massages them gently before pinching and pulling on your nipples. He lets one hand travel down, groping your thick thighs and love handles before reaching forward to between your legs. He licks his lips as he feels your wetness.

 “Naughty boy, teasing me all day and now you’re all wet?” 

    You giggle before spreading your legs further for him, “you had every opportunity to grab~” 

    He only chuckles as he lifts you out of the water, hauling you over his shoulder as he struts out of the water. Setting you down on your feet, he unfolds his button up floral shirt before covering you with it. 

“Let’s get you to the hotel room. I don’t wish to share you with anyone, not the ocean, the moon, or their many stars,” he murmurs before kissing you gently on the lips. Your face heats up and you can’t stop the flurry of giggles that erupt from your throat. 

“You can’t say something so poetic after groping me” 

Kento smirks before kissing you again. 

    You stand in front of the mirror, freshly out of the shower and gently drying your braids with an old shirt. Kento walks up and stands behind you, kissing your shoulder as he lets his hands roam your body. He kisses under your ear.

“You bewitch me every moment I lay my eyes on you. I’ve missed you so much,” he mumbles.

You melt into his touch, whimpering as his coarse hands grasp at your soft flesh. He bends you over, kissing the back of your neck before he presses a finger to your entrance, using his thumb to rub your clit he slides two fingers in, and relishes in your soft gasps and moans and he gently begins to stretch you apart. 

    He’s hypnotized at the sight of his fingers entering you. Why should you miss out on such a sight? He moves you over to the bed, pushes your thighs back, and he dives his fingers in again. Quickly thrusting, he can’t help the growl that escapes him. His cock throbs against his stomach as he watches you come undone beneath him. Hair strewn about, drool escaping plump lips as your thighs shiver and twitch. Your voice is like ambrosia, your skin like warm milk and honey. 

He is intoxicated by you and wants more. 

    He leans over you and pets your head gently as he lifts your face to his. You can’t help but cum on his fingers again, so skilled and confident as they play with your most sensitive of spaces. It’s been so long that it feels like the first time all over again. After some time, Kento reaches his limit; he stands up between your legs, cock hard and dripping precum onto your thigh. 

“May I?”  he asks as he spreads your legs more. You nod as you spread your lips apart for him. 

“Please Kento, I need you so bad,” you whimper. 

    Ever so slowly, he enters you, gritting his teeth as he feels your tight walls constrict around his cock. Your thighs shiver as he pushes inch by inch inside until his balls press against your ass. You wrap your arms and legs around him, desperate to be as close as you can as you feel him start to pull out. He kisses your neck, beginning a slow pace, grinding against you when he’s all the way.

    The room fills with a melody of moans, whimpers, and soft slapping of heavy balls. Your body shivers as orgasm after orgasm is milked from you with no remorse. His soft baritone coaxes you to let go, to embrace the abyss of pleasure that only he can send you to. 

“Such a good boy, so sweet and tight for me. I love you. I love you so much,” he repeats like a mantra. Your nails dig into his shoulders, desperately trying to hold onto something, anything as he pounds you into oblivion. 

    Kento’s cock throbs as he nears his end. Pulling back, he cups your face, looking you in the eye. You try to keep your eyes open, leaning into his touch. 

“Let go with me, fall apart for me, my song, I’m right here to catch you,” he pants as his grip on your hip tightens. Your legs tighten around him as you pull him closer. Foreheads pressed together, panting and breathing in each other, your eyes roll back as you finally let go. Clenching around him tightly, you moan to the heavens, gripping his body like a vice.

    As he cums inside of you with a growl, he holds you close to him. Shaking as he feels his balls clench, he pulls back to give you air, petting your face and helping you come down. 

Between us quickly

In a naked

Room.

(Poem by Langston Hughs) 

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

𝑺𝒍𝒐𝒘 𝑫𝒐𝒘𝒏 (𝑲𝒂𝒏𝒈 𝒀𝒆𝒐𝒔𝒂𝒏𝒈) 𝑹𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅

Pairing: BFF! Kang Yeosang (Ateez)/ BFF! Reader (Female)

Genre: Smut, Slight Angst, Fluff, Non Idol! AU.

Synopsis: Yeosang decides to show and prove to his best friend that slow and sensual sex is superior to rough fucking.

Word Count: Around 3-4K

Warnings: Mentions of smoking/drinking, oral sex (f receiving), fingering, nipple play, semi-drunk sex, sex taping (with consent), sweet vanilla sex with music/ led lights in the background, protective sex that transitions to unprotected (always do safe sex), creampie, best friend/ non-romantic relationship (?)

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"Room for one more?"

Turning her head in the direction of the deep, husky voice next to her, Y/N shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't really care. Not my place anyhow."

She lifted the almost finished cigarette to her lips. Taking a small puff of it, she blew out the smoke with then turned back to the dark brown male that had now taken a seat next to her on the porch.

"Want the last one?" She held up her cancer stick for him to take.

"No thanks." He shook his head.

Y/N scoffed at that. "What? Not hard enough for someone like you?"

Throwing the tiny butt onto the ground, she didn't care at all to put it out. Rolling his eyes, Yeosang extended his leg to finish the task of making sure she didn't set anything on fire.

"Sucker." Y/N repeated what she'd often call him.

"Dumbass." He counteracted her attack with his own nickname for her.

"Why are you even out here? Wouldn't you rather be inside and join in on the fun?" She asked him.

Picking up a nearby stick, Yeosang began drawing random shapes on the ground below him.

"What do you classify as fun? I mean, besides destroying your lungs and aging faster."

"Haha, you're so fucking hilarious." Y/N replied sarcastically.

"As if you're any better Yeo. I'm surprised you're not stumbling back to your shitty apartment with either Hwa or Joong helping your wasted ass."

"Need I remind you that you practically live in my so called 'shitty' apartment cause your roommate can't stand you at the dorms." He snorted at her.

"It's not that she can stand me! I can't stand her bringing her douche boyfriend in the middle of the night or at odd hours of the day just so they can fuck each other's brains out!" She exclaimed in frustration.

Smirking at her, Yeosang couldn't help himself as he said:

"Maybe you should get your brain fucked out once in a while. Might help you be a little less bitchy."

Y/N scoffed.

"I'm not bitchy and I certainly don't need it."

"Your face says you do. Like seriously Y/N, when was the last time you got a good fuck? Let me guess. Probably 8 months ago when you let Youngbin pound you behind the bleachers?" He laughed at her.

"Ok! You know what?! Fuck you Yeosang! I can't believe you brought that up!"

Standing up, she began to storm away from him, away from the party and decided to just go to the nearest bus stop so she could go hide under her bed and pretend she didn't exist. Crossing her arms over her chest, she shivered slightly when a slight breeze blew against her. But still she continued walking, not paying attention to the voice calling out for her from behind. She had gotten a block away from where she was when she heard the sound of something scraping against the pavement behind her.

"You're hard to find." Yeosang came up next to her, his feet firmly planted on the skateboard under him.

"And you're hard to get rid of." She threw a passive aggressive smile in his direction.

"Listen..." Shifting the board to the left, he blocked her from walking any further.

"I'm sorry ok? I didn't mean to upset you." He apologized.

"You didn't really upset me.....I just hate bringing that jerk up again."

Yeosang chuckled at her pouty expression. Getting off the skateboard, he kicked down on one of the sides, making it fly up so he could catch it with his hand and tuck it under his elbow.

"Come on. Wanna hang out at my place tonight?" He offered.

"Still got leftover booze from last time?" She asked in anticipation.

"Now who's the alcoholic here snip?"

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It was well past 11 and Y/N had already downed more than half the bottle of the hard liquor. She lifted the glass up again to her lips when she was stopped by her friend beside her.

"Easy tiger. I think you've had more than enough."

Taking the bottle away from her, he wiped the top off before taking a quick gulp before setting it down somewhere next to him.

"I'm not even drunk yet.." Y/N mumbled out.

"Certainly not, but you're definitely not sober. So I'd say you're just a tad bit tipsy."

Y/N shoved him with her shoulder when he tried to lean his head on her.

"No. Go away. I'm still mad at you." She barked at him, clicking her tongue in annoyance.

"So I take it I'm sleeping on the couch again?" Yeosang raised an eyebrow at her.

"Well I certainly aren't. Shit's uncomfortable af."

Standing up, she threw her crop sweater over her head and tossed it somewhere in the room, her black shorts soon following after. Yeosang barely batted an eyelash at his friend's actions, so used to her walking around half naked around his place.

Slumping down on the bed, she reached into Yeosang's dresser and opened the drawer, knowing she'd find his stash of tootsie pops in it. Picking out a cherry flavored one, she unwrapped it and popped it in her mouth, discarding the wrapper on the waste bin a few feet away from her. Turning on her back, she hummed softly before taking the lollipop out of her mouth momentarily to pat on the empty space next to her and say:

"Sangie, come here. I wanna cuddle."

Yeosang grumbled at her words.

"Whatever happened to me sleeping on the couch?"

"Never said you should. Now come on." She repeated at him.

Yeosang sighed in disbelief, seriously questioning why he even put up with his friend for so long. Removing his plaid pullover hoodie and black skinny jeans, leaving him in just a plain white T-shirt and his black briefs, he slid down next to Y/N and wrapped one of his arms around her waist.

"Happy now?" He inquired of her.

Y/N shifted a little so that they ended up in a more comfortable spooning position.

"Yeah I guess." She murmered softly.

Yeosang began to draw circles across her hip, occasionally pulling the side of her black panty and making it snap against her skin, making Y/N swat his hand away whenever he did.

"Can I have some?" Yeosang gestured to the candy in her mouth.

Pulling it out with a loud 'popping' noise, Y/N held it out for him to take. Putting it in his mouth, Yeosang sucked in it briefly then took a small bite out of it before handing it back to her.

"Heathen." Y/N derided him when she saw the mutilated lollipop.

"Puss." He snickered at her.

They laid there in silence for a few minutes, the only sound coming from them was the occasional sighs or hums that would elude from their mouths. Getting tired and bored of the painful lack of noise, Yeosang reached for his phone and connected it to his bluetooth speakers. Scrolling through his playlist, he smiled smugly as he found the one song he had been listening a lot to lately and did not hesitate to start playing it. Y/N jolted a little when the blaring of trumpets resonated through the room.

"Jesus fucking christ, why must it start in such an unholy manner?" She complained as she shifted a little in Yeosang's embrace.

Yeosang couldn't help but laugh softly.

"And you know that's not the unholy part about it."

Y/N couldn't help but smile at the sincerity of his words and especially not when the first verses started.

~Tell me what it is you wanna know

Finish up the bottle then we'll go, babe~

"Speaking of which, we didn't finish our bottle."

Y/N made a move to get up, but Yeosang pulled her back down, this time making her lay on top of him.

"Kang Yeosang!" She grunted at him, eyebrows furrowing at him.

"Snippy pants." He winked at her then placed a kiss to her nose.

His hands began to travel down the curve of her lower back, momentarily resting on her ass, his fingers digging into her soft skin.

~I'm too phased, it's too late

But coming down is all I ever do, babe, yeah~

"Pervert." Y/N accused him when he slapped her ass lightly.

"You weren't complaining when Youngbin-"

Y/N silenced him with a kiss to his lips, her tongue running across his upper lip. Yeosang tried to capture her tongue with his teeth, but she pulled back before he got the chance, making him whine softly.

"Mention that atrocity one more time and I will blow up your dick." She threatened him.

Yeosang couldn't help but poke fun at her.

"I wouldn't necessarily say no. I've heard your blowjob stories."

Y/N smacked his chest.

"What?! You think guys don't talk about it around me? They don't hold back just because we're close." He ruffled her hair.

"What about you? How come I never hear any stories from you? Is our little Sangie an actual saint?" She jeered at him.

Yeosang smiled softly, his hands pulling on Y/N's bra strap.

"First of all, let me assure you I'm not little.."

Lifting his hips up slightly, he grinded against her so she could feel his semi hard on. Y/N widened her eyes momentarily, her subconscious wishing he'd repeat the action one more time.

"And I'm not a saint. I'm just not as promiscuous as the other guys, that are into rough fucking all the girls in our class." He explained as he moved Y/N's strap so it fell off her shoulder.

Y/N couldn't help but look at him incredulous.

"Seriously? Getting fucked like a pornstar is one of the best feelings ever. Best kind of sex there is."

"I beg to differ babygirl. I find it to be completely overrated." He mused softly before placing a kiss to her exposed shoulder.

~And I'm so down if you're ready

I'm floating but I'm heavy

And I'll show you if you let me, girl~

"So what? You mean to tell me vanilla sex is better?" She rolled her eyes.

Yeosang couldn't help the mischievous smile that formed on his sculpture like face.

"It's not just better.....it's superior."

Yeosang's hand grabbed the remote next to his lamp, which he promptly turned off. Clicking on the first button, the room instantly illuminated a dark red from the LED lights that Yeosang had installed when he first moved into the apartment.

"Want me to show you?"

Y/N hadn't even responded but Yeosang was already unclasping her bra. His hands caressed her exposed back as he patiently waited for her answer. Feeling brave, Y/N sat up to let the garment fall off her body and onto the floor. She looked back to see Yeosang's reaction. He bit his lip, his hands gripping the sheets beneath him in an effort to contain himself from touching her before she gave her consent.

Y/N leaned down, her hand cupping his chin.

"Show me then."

Closing the distance between them, she kissed him tenderly. Yeosang hummed into the kiss, his fingers tucking a side of her hair behind her ear.

~I don't know if you already know how

But girl, I got the feeling that you know now~

Yeosang's tongue pressed against her bottom lip, making Y/N chuckle, but nonetheless granted him access to her mouth. Holding the sides of her neck, Yeosang swirled his tongue inside her, before pulling her own into his mouth to gently suck on it.

"Hehet....you smell like alcohol." He said in between their makeup session.

"Shut up and kiss me you dork."

She pulled him back in and deepened their kiss, her mouth hungrily and sloppily kissing his, her lips trailing across his chin and jaw at times.

"Fuck. How desperate are you?" Yeosang asked.

"A whole lot, now can you fucking stop being the ass you are and get on with it?" She pleaded with him.

In a flash, Yeosang flipped her onto her back. Burying his face in her neck, he placed open mouth kisses across it until he found exactly what he was looking for when Y/N's breath hitched.

"Found you."

Yeosang began to suck onto the sensitive patch of skin he had discovered. Y/N tilted her head to give him better access, which he took complete advantage of. Yeosang only pulled away after making sure there'd be a crimson red mark for anyone to see the following days. Satisfied with his work, he moved further south and began to kiss down her sternum, his hands going from her hips to her waist.

His lips went from kissing in between the valley of her breasts, to gliding over and taking one of her perky nipples into his mouth. His other hand made sure that its twin wasn't left unattended as he pinched and played with it delicately between his long and slender fingers. Without realizing it, Y/N arched her back, making Yeosang smile against her skin.

"You're definitely enjoying this." He teased her, biting faintly on her tiny bud.

"Sh-shut up..." She mumbled.

"And I haven't even gotten to the fun part."

Yeosang dragged his mouth painfully slow down her stomach, placing open mouth kisses on several parts of her skin. Once, he reached her belly button, he couldn't help but feel a little playful. Pressing his face down, he blew against her skin, causing her to squeak and giggle at the vibrations.

"Sangie!" She gushed at him and his awfully cute action.

"Sorry." He apologized but the sparkle in his eyes indicated he was anything but.

When he realized he was in between her legs, only a piece of fabric separating him from her most intimate place, he looked back up at her, mentally asking her if she still wanted to continue. Maybe it was the partially drunk part of her brain or maybe it was the sober part, either way, Y/N nudged Yeosang with her knee, urging him to do something.

Getting the hint, Yeosang grabbed the sides of her panties and began to rid her of them. Y/N lifted herself up so the process was easier for him, and even parted her legs for him, her neediness wanting him to just do as he pleased.

Yeosang inhaled and exhaled sharply as he stared down at his best friend's glistening and almost dripping core, the astonishment and lust in his stare quite unmistakable. His hands wrapped themselves on the back of her knees, his body leaning closer to get a better look at her.

"Well?" Y/N chuckled when he stayed dumb for a while.

Smiling an ironically pure smile, Yeosang didn't take his gaze off from between her legs as he responded:

"It's pretty.......so fucking pretty."

Turning his head, he kissed her right knee tenderly, dragging his lips around it. Eventually, he began kissing up her inner thighs, both of them, leaving no spot unattended. Y/N began to breath more rapidly as she watched him earnestly inch closer and closer to her lips.

"Oh-oh..."

Y/N gasped when Yeosang dragged the tip of his nose up her slit, making sure to press down on her clit.

"Fuck! You smell absolutely delicious babe."

Releasing her knees, he brought his fingers up so they could spread her folds apart so he could glide his wet muscle up and taste a bit of her. Yeosang couldn't get enough of her taste, as shown by his relentless effort in licking and sucking at her clit. One of his fingers began prodding at her entrance, swirling around and finally sinking inside her.

"Fucking hell Y/N, you're so tight and you're already sucking in one of my fingers. Seriously how long have you not gotten any dick?" He inquired as he added a second finger, beginning to scissor them inside her.

"Too. Fucking. Long."

Shutting her eyes, her hands went to Yeosang's hair and began pulling at it, her hips pressing against his face.

"Yeosangie..... help me..." She whined at him.

Paying attention to her needs, Yeosang buried his face in her heat once again, sucking and lapping enthusiastically, moaning occasionally as his 2 fingers slid in and out of her at a moderate pace. Y/N's chest began rising up and down, she could feel herself getting closer and closer to spilling all over her friend's face. The thought of her actually cumming in Yeosang's mouth riled her up more than she'd ever think it would. Yeosang felt her walls tightening around his fingers, clear indication she was about to cum. Being the teasing asshole he was, he pulled his fingers out and detached his mouth from her core, panting slowly from having been eating her out so passionately, some of her arousal smeared on his chin, upper lip and even on his nose.

"What the hell you jerk!?"

Y/N sat up, fully committed to smack him across the face, but he gripped her wrists as he forced her back down.

"Calm down Y/N, I promise you'll be cumming soon."

Leaning in, he kissed her forehead lovingly, sending flutters down her body. Her hand placed itself on his chest.

"Off." Although it was technically an order, she meant it more as a request.

Yeosang pulled his shirt over his head, allowing Y/N to gawked at his lean but toned abs and muscles.

"Fuck.......when did you start working out skater boi?"

Yeosang blushed and giggled shyly.

"Around the same time you began showing off your legs a lot more."

Y/N watched in anticipation as he began to remove his boxers. She widened her eyes when she saw her long time friend's cock slap against his stomach, the tip already leaking out precum.

"Holy shit. You weren't kidding when you said you weren't little." She complimented him.

Y/N reached out to try and grab it in her hand, but Yeosang swatted her hand away.

"You can suck my cock another time. Right now though, I'm dying to have it inside your tight hole."

Y/N clenched at the mere thought of having such a good looking cock inside her. She'd never outwardly admit it, but she always had a thing for visual stimulation and above average dicks.

Opening the drawer, Yeosang took out a condom and ripped it open with his teeth, soon rolling it onto his length. He slowly lowered his body on top of hers, kissing her softly as he aligned himself at her entrance. With a roll of his hips, he slid inside her, both of them moaning loudly. Yeosang let a few seconds pass before he began rolling his hips, starting at a slow and steady pace that matched the rhythm of the music playing in the background. His face hid in her neck, biting and kissing at her shoulders as his hands kept her waist firmly planted on the mattress.

"Fuck, you feel amazing Y/N." He whispered against her ear, making her sigh blissfully.

Wanting to dote on her more, he began spurting out a relay of compliments.

"You look so beautiful like this baby. Fuck! I wish I could capture this moment forever."

Feeling bold, Y/N held out her hand and began tapping around until she found what she was wanting to grab. She held out Yeosang's phone to him.

"Then why don't you?"

Yeosang groaned, halting his movements so as to not cum from her insinuation.

"Are you for real?" He wanted to make sure she wasn't kidding.

"Please just don't film my face. I don't want anyone to know it's me in case it gets in the wrong hands or you upload it to a porn site." She stated making him burst out in a lighthearted laugh.

"Oh honey I won't do that. I'm keeping this for my fap material."

Yeosang sat up as he turned on the camera. He began moving once the phone started recording the naughty scene taking place in his bedroom, this time going a little rougher than at first. He loved watching the way Y/N's tits bounced every time he pushed back inside of her. The red LED lights only made it more thrilling, adding a more erotic aesthetic that the camera captured perfectly.

~I'm burning up, yeah, all I see is red, ah

She said "Fuck me like I'm famous"

I said, "Okay"~

Yeosang's free hand ran across her stomach, momentarily pressing down on the bulge protruding from there. Then it began to squeeze at her breasts, fondling and groping them in a not too harsh fashion.

"Yeosang..... I need more..." She spoke out.

Yeosang pressed paused to help her out.

"Want more? Ok. Turn around for me baby."

~Push a little further on the edge

Crawl a little further on the bed, babe~

Pulling out of her, his hands helped her turn her body for him. Y/N immediately got on all fours, but Yeosang pressed his hand on her back.

"As cute as you look right now my friend, that's not what I had in mind."

Pushing her down, he made her lay her body on the mattress into a low doggy position. Y/N looked back at him with a questioning gaze.

"Trust me Y/N. It'll have you cumming in seconds."

Picking up his phone again, he was about to resume recording when Y/N's words made him snap up.

"Sangie please fuck me raw."

Yeosang swore he had a mini heart attack when she said that.

"Y..Y/N....what are you-"

"It's ok! I'm on birth control and I just really want to feel you and have you cum inside me." She confessed unashamedly.

Yeosang thought about it for a minute before deciding 'screw it' and threw away the condom that was wrapped around his dick. Pumping himself a few times, he finally pressed record again, wanting to capture the moment he entered his friend completely raw.

This time his thrusts were more deep and fast paced, wanting to have Y/N come as fast as possible, which wasn't going to take too long, if her now loud gasps and moans were a major clue.

"Oh- oh my g-god!"

Y/N now understood what Yeosang meant when he said he'd have her cumming in seconds. With his cock pushing in and out of her rapidly it made the mattress underneath her rub against her clit in the most addicting friction she'd ever had.

"T-told you so.." Yeosang couldn't hide the shit eating grin on his face, which Y/N would have slapped off if she could see it.

Gripping at her hip harshly, he angled himself so he could hit that special spot in her, finding it quite easily after many practices in the same room from past lovers. Y/N tried biting her lip but it wasn't enough so she resorted to hiding her face on the pillow in front of her, muffling her near shrieking moans.

~You're buried in the pillow, yeah, you're so loud

But I'm about to show you, baby, slow down~

Lifting her head up slightly, she tried to warn him.

"S-Sangie...I'm gonna-"

She threw her head down again, not wanting Yeosang's next door neighbors to complain next day about the noise, given how thin the walls were.

Positioning his phone on the dresser, Yeosang crouched down and lifted her face up to look at him. She looked almost completely fucked out, her hair sticking onto her face, sweat beads piling on her forehead. Yeosang kissed her messily, his mouth silencing some of her moans as well as his own.

"Go ahead gorgeous. Cum for me. I'll be right behind her."

Yeosang let out a deep, gutteral moan when he felt her clench around him, her body shaking underneath him as she came hard. A series of cursing ensued as he spilled himself inside her, coating her walls with his cum. He slowed down his movements, but never halted them completely, wanting her and himself to ride out their orgasms. When he finally stilled inside her, he grabbed his phone again and held it close to where their bodies connected.

"Holy shit. That's so hot." He said in an almost gloating tone as he pulled himself out of his best friend and watched as part of his cum seeped out of her.

Turning off the camera, he reached for the box of wet tissues on his nightstand and began wiping Y/N down. Tapping on her shoulder, he asked:

"You ok there bud?"

Y/N let out a muffled "Yeah."

"Cute." He shook his head.

Turning off the music, he plopped beside Y/N, turning her so they could resume spooning like they were in the beginning.

"So....?"

Y/N opened her eyes and tilted her head to look at him.

"So what?" She looked at him rather puzzled.

"Do you agree now that vanilla sex is superior?" He wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Y/N hummed as she pondered about it in her head. Turning around so her body faced his, she pulled him closer.

"I don't know.....might need a little more convincing..." She joked.

Yeosang took notice of the slight smirk that tugged at the corners of her lips. Wrapping his arms around her, he kissed the top of her head.

"Oh trust me. I don't think this will be the last time...."

═━═━═━═━═━══━═━═━═━═━═

~Song used here: Slow Down- Chase Atlantic ~

[cyoc49]

HIMBO Magazine: Changing Departments

*click! click! click! click!*

Derek listened to the camera flash as he sat on the side of the bed. He was currently doing a photo shoot for HIMBO magazine, a fashion and lifestyle magazine “for the modern gay male™”. Fake blood dripped against his chest - they were doing some Halloween type of shoot. But let’s be honest, the blood wasn’t the focus of the shot: it was his body. Derek had never been the best student - and his attitude certainly didn’t help - but if there was one thing he knew how to do, it was make his body look as sexy as humanly possible. Derek scoured nutrition blogs to make sure he stayed up to date on everything related to fitness, and the dedication showed itself in his beautiful, sculpted body. Sitting here with no shirt on and wearing a pair of lethally tight skinny jeans, he looked like every gay man’s wet dream. To put it simply, Derek was hot as hell; problem is, he knew he was hot at hell.

“Alright, that’s good. I think we have what we need, thank you Mr. Hale” the director said. Derek stood up and two twinkish looking assistants came over to remove the blood. Derek stood still and tried to ignore the two obviously gay men putting their hands all over his body. Derek was the kind of guy who thought all gay men were jumping at the bit for any man they can find. Doing a photo shoot for a gay magazine was certainly not his dream, but hey: a paycheck is a paycheck.

After he was cleaned off, Derek put on a t shirt and enjoyed the feeing of it stretched tight against his pecs. He slung a Louis Vuitton backpack over his shoulders. All he had to do was collect his check and he could be done with this homo magazine. Derek headed towards the doorway connecting the studio space to the rest of the offices. He turned the corner into the hallway, only to immediately crash into someone coming from the opposite direction. Papers went flying.

Derek hesitated, then reluctantly crouched down to help the man pick up his papers. As he did, the man spoke to him in a deep voice “You know, you should really watch where you’re going. People are busy around here.”

This was the remark that set Derek off. It was enough that he had done a photo shoot outside his comfort zone, and ran into someone while he was leaving, but now he was being sassed by some worker who couldn’t slow down enough to watch out for passers. Derek had had enough of this magazine. “You know,” he said, “I’m surprised. I thought you fags would be more excited to slam into other guys.”

Derek could sense the shift in mood immediately. All the workers around him who had been buzzing about immediately stopped and looked at th scene. The office had gone dead silent. As Derek looked around at all the men staring at them, the man he had bumped into finished collecting his papers and stood up, allowing Derek to finally look at him properly. Woah, this was a fine looking man. Strappingly tall and ruggedly handsome. He filled out his expensive-looking three-piece suit perfectly. His whole demeanor was one of absolute confidence. Finally, Derek realized what had happened. He hadn’t bumped into some random employee. He had knocked over and subsequently cussed out the boss of the whole place.

*Well*, Derek said to himself, *I fucked up bad this time*.

The boss was surprisingly well-composed for someone who had just been called a slur, Derek thought. As if to prove this point, the boss suddenly started laughing. It was a good, deep laugh. And when he laughed, everyone else in the building laughed along with him. Derek stared at everyone in the office in confusion. Why did they find this so funny? Was it because he’s their boss? And they were all looking at the boss with such admiration. Derek just hoped this meant the issue would blow over and he could leave before embarrassing himself sooner.

But before he could step away, he was spoken to. “I used to get really angry when people said stuff like that to me,” the boss explained in a rich, inviting voice, “now it just makes me sad, because I see all the failed potential hiding behind that language.”

Derek took a little offense to that last statement, but he knew he was in no position to argue right now. It seemed like the laughter was the all-clear the rest of the office needed to know their boss was okay, because the normal hum of voices and keyboards had returned. Now it was just him and the extremely powerful man he had pissed off. Derek broke the silence. “Look, Mr...”

“Christian Le Maítre” the gorgeous boss informed him, “Editor in Chief of HIMBO magazine. But everyone around here just calls me Mr. M.”

“Right. Well, uh, Mr. M, I’m really sorry about-“

“No you’re not.” Christian cut him off without missing a beat. “I’ve seen so many models like you come and go through these halls. You think you’re hot shit, and take pity on all of my boys in this office who had to take desk jobs because their bodies weren’t nice enough to let them get by on looks alone. But you know, we’re hard workers here. And we’re a close knit family.”

Derek objected to being interrupted, but as Christian talked, he felt his defenses melt away with every word. Mr. M was right, Derek realized. I am a narcissistic asshole who holds myself above others. He had never felt like this before. But everything Mr. M said just seemed right. When this gorgeous, confident man spoke, Derek realized he was speaking the truth.

“What’s your name, son?” Mr. M asked him.

“D-Derek, sir. Derek Hale.” Derek was never one stutter, but how else could he feel right now?

“Well Derek, I’m sure our lame little office doesn’t fit your macho man swagger persona, but I think you’d find that working here is pretty great.”

Was that an offer? Derek didn’t know. He had completely forgotten the context of their conversation, and indeed his reason for being in this office in the first place was slowly becoming a distant memory. All Derek knew in this moment was that he HAD to work at HIMBO. In fact, he couldn’t imagine life without working here.

Derek tried to compose a response, but was increasingly timid in the presence of this incredible man. “Well, uh, Mr. M. Perhaps if you have any opening I might be able to, uh-”

Mr. M just laughed again, and this time Derek laughed right along with him.

“Well I’m shocked to hear you change your tune so quickly, but I can’t say I’m surprised. Working here is kind of a dream job, if I do say so myself. But there’s no need to submit your CV and go through the traditional channels. I am actually prepared to offer you a job on the spot.”

Derek felt his ears burning. How lucky was he! To be offered a job at the best company on earth. He would take it immediately!

“Mr. M, it would be an honor to work for you” Derek bowed his head as he said this. Respect was important, especially for the man who was giving him a job no questions asked.

“Glad to hear it, sport! Now full disclosure, it’s a clerking position. I know, not the most exciting stuff, but here at HIMBO we believe even the most mundane work can be made magical! Of course, you would have to change a few of your behaviors to *best* fit the position. Your ego, your hot-headedness. Do you think those are things good for a clerk to have?”

“No, sir” Derek said with convocation. “Anything you want me to change, I will change.”

Christian cracked a smile, as if Derek had said something unintentionally funny. “Well I admire your commitment. It’s just, clerks are so straight-laced and serious, and you are such a character, Derek. Mr. Macho Man with a great body. Actually, I do like this body.” Christian looked Derek up and down, “I think that can stay. But as for everything else, well, I can take care of that.”

Christian stopped talking and instead just looked at Derek. The hopeful employee stood there silently, unsure of what to do. Just then, he suddenly felt a draining feeling. It wasn’t his muscles or his IQ or any of that stuff that he felt fading away, it was more like he was losing... his personality? All the pride Derek felt over his hot body and great life was disappearing. All the anger he get towards people not like him, slipping away. But it wasn’t replaced by new emotions, it wasn’t replaced by anything. Derek stopped feeling strong feelings about much of anything. He liked his job, he followed the news, but he had never had any opinions of his own. Never tried to be individual or stand out. Derek was becoming like his new favorite flavor of ice cream: vanilla.

As Derek’s personality slowly morphed him into a contender for the World’s Most Dull Man, his wardrobe changed to follow suit. His designer t shirt loosened out a bit. The sleeves grew down his arms before spouting buttons and cuffs. Buttons also sprouted down the middle, and the shirt gained a collar, becoming a basic button-up shirt. A white plaid pattern spread across the shir. At the same time, Derek felt his skinny jeans go “pah” as all the tightness shrugged out of them, changing them into (gag) regular fit pants. They lightened to gray and changed material to thin cotton, becoming work slacks. His new plaid shirt automatically tucked itself into the pants, and a brown leather belt formed around his waist, with his expensive designer sneakers morphing into brown leather dress shoes to match. The LV backpack he wore fell as one of the straps broke off, before disappearing altogether. The remaining strap lengthened and slung itself over his shoulder, and the bag itself shifted into a basic messenger bag, holding plenty of important documents and paperwork.

For a brief moment, Derek felt confusion and fear. Why were these changes happening to him? Where did his nice stuff go, and what were these boring-ass clothes replacing them? These thoughts only lasted for half a second, before Derek realized how right this was. This was his style, or more accurately his *lack* of style. Derek had never cared about trends, or getting fancy new clothes. As long as they fit him well and looked professional enough for work, that was all that mattered in Derek’s eyes. A Ross Membership Card popped into his wallet to cement this change.

Derek felt something in his pocket, and pulled out a pair of black-rimmed glasses. These were the glasses he needed to see, of course. Derek opened them up and put them on. To follow suit, his hair parted itself to the side and became thick with gel holding his new professional haircut in place.

As promised, Christian had left Derek his body, but had taken basically everything else from him. Where there had once stood an arrogant, trendy mode, there was now a walking turtleneck. Normally in cases like this, Derek would sprout new memories of his new life. But no memories came, because Derek didn’t really *have* a life. He was now a total office drone. From 9-5 he worked faithfully for HIMBO, and after that he went home and solved jigsaw puzzles until it was time for bed... except on the nights where Mr. M invited Derek to his house. Derek truly wanted nothing more from life.

Christian smiled at the new corporate boy that stood before him. “Okay I think you’ve handled the onboarding process well, Dirk. Dirk, isn’t it?”

“Yes sir.” Dirk replied matter of factly. Dirk Kent. Filing clerk for HIMBO magazine.

“Great! But there’s actually one more thing I need from you. I’m still a little raw about that comment of yours earlier, and I would hate for it to taint our working relationship with each other, so allow me to bury this hatchet.”

Christian snapped his fingers, and Dirk felt his impressive manhood shrink, and shrink, and shrink, until he heard a “pop!” sound and knew that it was no more. Poor Dirk was smooth as could be in his private areas. But he didn’t mind: being unable to orgasm helped him focus on his work. And besides, if Mr. M needed help Dirk still had two perfectly serviceable holes on him.

Christian laughed again, eliciting another laugh from Dirk. “Dirk, pal, I don’t think I have ever been happier with one of my new hires. But you know, I do seal my deals with a kiss.”

“Why thank you sir!” Dirk replied with enthusiasm, as he allowed Christian to walk over, turn up his chin, and plant a kiss on his lips. And it was the greatest kiss Dirk had ever felt. Indeed, it was the only kiss he had ever felt, but as far as kisses go it was still pretty spectacular. As Dirk stood there with his lips pressed against those of his incredivle boss, he knew there was nothing more he would want from life.

As they parted, Derek looked hopefully up at his boss “Where should I start with my work, sir?” He lived to work.

Christian smiled again. “I’ll film you in on that in a minute, but let me take you to your desk. You’ll be down in the accounting department. In fact, I think you’ll be desk neighbors with our other new hire Bartholomew! You’ll love him. A total nerd but a sweet kid regardless.” Without warning, Christian turned and walked down the hall. He didn’t need to say anything. Dirk instinctively followed him, just as he instinctively obeyed every command Mr. M gave him. Life was easier that way.

[capesandshapes]

All You Had To Do Was Stay (Adrienette) (2/4)

Summary:

Three years ago, Marinette revealed her identity to him. Three years ago, he promised to wait in a hotel room for her. Three years ago, she opened the door to find it empty.

Now she's expected to play nice with him, since she's the maid of honor and he's unfortunately the best man. But old habits die hard, and old feelings die harder.

"This is a wedding, not a death march, Marinette."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They had gone overboard.

Marinette had one job, and they had gone overboard.

Okay, she had five jobs—but at the moment it felt like only one, and at the moment, that job was completely and utterly failed.

Every single surface of the bakery was covered in cakes. Every godly combination of cake, every possible frosting, every style of decoration, every type of vanilla—And that wasn’t even the end of it.

No! Because what if, at the very last moment, Alya and Nino had needed cupcakes or a pie or a tarte. Were they sure they didn’t want cookies? They could include them in the gift bags! And savory cakes weren’t off the table either, Marinette’s father reassured them that he could stay up the whole night and bake enough for Paris if they needed.

Not to mention the eight boxes on the counter behind Marinette—She’d been looking thin! This past week Tom had been worried that she’d been depressed—Never mind the fact that she was—and his little girl needed her favorite treats… Which meant every sweet she had ever so much as smiled at, and so many dumplings that Marinette would have to freeze them and eat them for months to come. Nino and Alya had similar offerings behind them.

Nino and Alya also had strained looks on their faces.

The cake tasting had gone over an hour later than it was supposed to, and there was no possible way out. Nino checked his smartwatch a thousand times, but every attempt he made at opening his mouth found his plate refilled.

“I just love weddings,” Marinette’s father proclaimed, tears in the corners of his eyes.

Marinette couldn’t miss the soft mumble of her mother trying to calm him, “someday, Tom.” She did her best to eat then, if only to soothe the two of them.

Her parents didn’t know what had happened between her and Adrien, only that one day he was there and the next day he jetted out of Paris. It was better that it stayed that way, god forbid they found out. She didn’t want to be there the moment that her father realized; she didn’t think she could stand to have him look at her afterwards.

He always wanted the world to be good to her, and she didn’t have the heart to tell him that it hadn’t been. That she’d faced monsters he couldn’t imagine and had skirted the line between life and death as a hero of Paris. That was one secret he would never know.

“I really do have to go, Mister Dupain,” Nino tried for the hundredth time as her dad placed four more slices on his plate. “There’s this thing and I… I mean, I can’t leave my dude waiting.”

“You could invite them here,” Tom said, serving Alya a slice of spiced rum cake. The young woman teetered between blissful and concerned. “Like I always say, the more the merrier.”

“Yeah, that’s like, a completely valid statement in some cases but…” Nino trailed off, flinching. Her dad frowned. “I mean, it’s not you! Definitely not you guys, you’re amazing—Marinette is amazing!” He quickly added. “It’s just one of those things…”

“We’re not hip anymore, or they don’t like cake?” Tom pushed. “Because I have croissants, croquettes, even a quiche or two! If they’re gluten intolerant, I have a whole spread!”

“No, no! He loves your stuff!” Nino immediately flinched the moment he said it.

The gears began to turn in her father’s head at the same time Marinette nearly choked on her slice of cake. “Adrien!” His face lit up with familiarity, making the obvious guess since the blond’s return was the talk of Paris. “It’s been so long since we’ve seen him, honey!” He immediately turned to her mother, and Marinette could see him quickly begin to recall the young man’s order.

“Three years,” Marinette finally butted in, supplementing the information her father would no doubt demand to know. “It’s been three years.”

“He must have gotten so skinny,” her father said with an edge of concern, “Sabine, we should make a box!” Her mother was already ahead of him.

Alya butted in, swallowing the remainder of her cake in one bite. “I mean, he’s still a model, maybe he shouldn’t come. I mean, the temptation, the…” She looked to Marinette to supplement, all the woman could do was vigorously nod her head, “carbs.” Alya winced.

“Nonsense, everyone knows those diets aren’t healthy,” Sabine began.

“He’s really into them,” Alya insisted.

“Well,” Sabine continued, fully dedicated to the idea of helping such a poor, starving model, “we’ll fix that. Call him up.”

“That’s…”

“—I’m sure Marinette wants to see him,” Sabine finished.

Oh, how utterly wrong she was. “Call him,” Marinette said, trying to make the strange way that she pulled back her lips look more like a smile than a wince of pain, “what’s the worst that could happen?”

****************

The worst that could happen was that he could show up. And he did.

And suddenly, there he was. Adrien. Standing in her parents’ shop door, a familiar blue scarf around his neck tied almost as tightly as her father’s arms were wrapped around him. Laughing, smiling, acting like nothing had happened and like he hadn’t been gone for three years.

Until he saw her.

“You sit next to Marinette, Adrien,” Sabine insisted, “we don’t want to break up the lovebirds.”

She swore she saw him swallow.

He looked different in real life compared to his Instagram posts, she was pleased to see. They’d erased the small bags underneath his eyes, the creasing beginning to form between his brows, and that persistent memory of a smile that hung on his lips even when he was meaning to look stoic and thoughtful. She was a little thankful for it, because that meant that the man she sometimes looked at in the middle of the night, that she spent far too much time on, was fake. She wasn’t crying over the real Adrien Agreste while he was lounging on a beach somewhere with flawless skin and a perfect smile.

“It’s been a long time, Marinette,” he said as he settled beside her, his voice soft and almost inaudible. She couldn’t place the tone of it.

“Whose fault is that,” her response was sarcastic and the smile she put on for her parents’ sake was fake. She’d rather he sat in a dumpster outside.

He winced.

“So,” Tom carried on, loading up a plate for Adrien to the point that Marinette was almost afraid of it cracking, “New York, Berlin, Rome, Moscow, and Sydney! You’re really well-traveled now, Adrien, I’m a little jealous! I’m afraid to say that I didn’t pin you for a globetrotter, but maybe I was a little wrong in that! You’ve done some really impressive things these past years.”

“Yeah,” he said, accepting the plate from Tom with a gracious nod, “I’ve really gone out there, but I’m happy to be home. I always tell everyone that my heart is in Paris. I was sad to leave it.”

“So, you’ll be staying around then?” Sabine perked up.

“For a few months, maybe if I’m lucky a few years,” he said. “It really depends on how things go.” Looking down at his plate, Adrien said, “I sort of left a lot of things up in the air when I left Paris.”

If there was a word for the look Marinette shot him out of the corner of her eye, it was poisonous.

It was Tom’s turn to speak again, he continued his interrogation of Adrien as Sabine shot her daughter a questioning look, and Alya gave Marinette a warning kick from her seat a few inches away. “So, what’s on the checklist while you’re here? Any sights you have to see, things you have to do, friends you have to check in with?”

All anger melted away, dissolving into the utterly terrifying sea of embarrassment. Alya’s eyes widened in mock horror as the color left Marinette’s face, the way he said friends let there be no mistake, her father was going to try to wingman for her.

“I think most of his friends are gone by now—” Marinette quickly interrupted.

“Well, I have my father’s house to sell, I’d like to check in with a few victims of akumatization, and—” he paused at her statement, his eyes quickly looking over to her and catching her gaze for a split second. “I had some friends I wanted to check in,” he said, his tongue wetting his lips in an awkward show of unease.

“Had,” Marinette emphasized, drawing the line.

“Had,” Adrien repeated, a flicker of curiosity in his eyes. He sat up a little straighter, looking back to the Dupain-Chengs. “It’s been a long time.” Indeed, it had been.

*****************

Somehow they made it through all the cakes, her parents sending each home with an additional box of their favorites so that they could be absolutely sure of their selections. Alya and Nino went home together, and there was an option for Marinette to stay at her parents, but one look at her mother’s eyes roaming over her like a crime scene and Marinette knew she wouldn’t take it.

She always liked the walk home anyway, and her parents wanted to speak to Adrien a little longer. So, giving the slightest of waves, she walked out.

She only realized what an awful choice that was minutes later, when she heard the pounding of pavement behind her and a familiar voice calling her name. “Hey, Marinette, wait up!” Adrien.

Maybe if she pretended not to hear it, he would go away.

He did not go away.

“Marinette!”

“I should have just stayed home, I should have just slept in my childhood bed,” Marinette mumbled, cursing the fact that she didn’t live near a tourist destination where she could easily vanish into the crowds. No, instead she was walking down a quiet, empty street; one where it was impossible to ignore him.

“Hey,” he said when he finally caught up to her, and she clenched her eyes shut as tightly as possible as if that would somehow make him go away.

Hey, that was what he had to say? Three years and she gets a hey? “Hey,” she said back, her voice dripping with unenthusiasm. What on earth did he think he was doing?

She opened her eyes to see his hand at the back of his neck, a sheepish expression on his face. “I, uh, just wanted to say hi.” Right.

“Of course,” she said awkwardly, “that’s all you want to say, right. Thank you,” she paused. “Hi,” she reiterated, echoing the statement back at him. As if they hadn’t just spent four hours trying cakes together, as if he hadn’t sat right beside her in her parents’ shop, as if she wasn’t freaking Ladybug and he Chat Noir.

They were on hi terms now. What even were hi terms?

He quickened his pace to keep up with her. “Listen, uh,” he tried again, “I want this to work out.”

He caught the look on her face.

“The wedding,” he quickly clarified. “Their wedding, not ours. Because, you know, there won’t be an our wedding, there will be a… their wedding. And that’s uh…,” he was trying not to ramble, she could tell. “Yeah.”

“Yeah,” she parroted back.

“I just want to get through this,” he started quickly, and his eyes immediately widened as he realized what he said and how it could be misunderstood. He tried to open his mouth again, but she stopped him before he could get more words out.

“We will,” she said.

“Right, because we’re…” A team? He’d ended that. “Good at working together,” he said, and even Marinette had to flinch at how lame it sounded.

“Yeah, I’m sure we are,” Marinette replied, letting her eyes drift down to the sidewalk. She didn’t want it to last too much longer, she didn’t want him to see that she still lived in the same place. She didn’t want him to have another part of her life.

She couldn’t afford for him to.

And yet there he was, and she could tell that he wanted it. That he wanted another part of her life, that he wanted—god, what did he want? To ruin her again? To make the fact that it wasn’t going to happen completely clear?

“I missed you,” he said suddenly, his voice low and almost croaking.

“Go home, Adrien.”

[captain-josslett]

Enigma - Part Four

Masterlist

Summary: Emma Swan’s world gets turned upside down when her memories are altered, erasing her knowledge of a magical town and those she loves.

Things start to look up when Emma meets a striking redhead and a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.

Words: 4.7k

Warnings: Fluff, Period, Blood, slight angst? Maybe?

Pairings: Emma Swan x Regina Mills, Emma Swan x ??

This Part: Emma and Henry start to settle into their routine and Henry meets Nat.

Who is this Natalie Rushman? 🧐

Thank you for reading and let me know if you wanna be tagged or any general feedback will be greatly appreciated. Please! I like knowing your thoughts.

Taglist: (Let me know if you want to come off this one) @finleyfray, @life-is-hella-unfair, @natasha-danvers, @supergirl-writingz, @camslightstories, @thinking1bee, @aznblossom, @crispykidcookiebasketball

The rest of the week goes extremely well for both Henry and Emma. Henry makes fast friends with those similar to his age, especially with two teenage boys he met on the first day of camp, called Peter Parker and Ned Leeds.

Emma had been surprised when she came home to find the trio on the sofa playing video games but she was pleased Henry was making some decent friends. She enjoyed hearing their banter as she made dinner and meeting Peter’s Aunt May and Uncle Ben when they came to pick Peter and Ned up from the apartment. May had even given her phone number to the blonde with the suggestion of meeting up for coffee. Emma gladly took it with the plan of taking the brunette up on her offer.

For her friendship with Natalie it grew stronger through the week, especially during training where Nat pushes Emma to her limits, helping her know what she can do and how to improve on any areas she was struggling with.

Natalie had been impressed with her shooting skills and didn’t need to give her many tips. Only that practice makes perfect, which comes to pass because soon Emma is hitting most, if not all, the targets during gun training.

Next were the assault courses and Emma couldn't help but feel a little bit pleased with herself when she had been able to keep up with Natalie as they ran through the course. Only stumbling a few times when she would get distracted by watching her redheaded friend.

They continued to spar throughout the week and finally Emma was able to win a few rounds against her partner. One time she had knocked Nat to the floor but when Emma held out her hand to help her friend up, Natalie kicked her leg out, causing Emma to fall onto her back and letting out a high pitched squeal.

Both burst out laughing as they lay on the floor and eventually had to abandon training because they couldn't focus due to crying with laughter.

Today was finally Friday and Emma is feeling very nervous about having her new friend round to meet Henry. Especially after the possible kiss that was interrupted and never brought up again.

But as Emma feverishly cleans the apartment she decides to leave things with Nat as they are. To figuratively brush the almost kiss under the rug.

After all this is the first real friendship the blonde has had for a long time or for as long as she can remember. Yes she has had friends but not with the easy connection she has with Nat and she doesn’t want to ruin it.

Finally Emma is putting the cleaning supplies back under the sink and she rushes to the cupboard by the door to get the vacuum. Henry is playing video games with his legs up on the coffee table, but will occasionally watch his Mom as she zips around the apartment. When the vacuum blares to life he pauses the game, annoyed he can’t hear anything.

“MA!” Henry yells, causing Emma to pause and look at him, turning the machine off.

“What Henry?”

“I can’t hear the TV!” He groans pointing at his game. But he gulps when Emma gives him an unimpressed glare.

“You know it would have been nice if you offered to help. But I left you to it.” Emma crosses her arms. “I am trying to make our home nice for our guest. Now can you please get changed while I finish up in here? And make sure you close your door so she doesn’t catch sight of your room. Which you will clean and tidy tomorrow.”

“Aw Maaa!!” Henry whines and slams his hands either side of him on the sofa.

“Hen-rryyy.” Copies her son before turning around, hiding the smirk on her face. Her kid was truly entertaining sometimes, though admittedly somewhat annoying. But what young teenager wasn’t?

Emma continues vacuuming the apartment, making sure it shines and smells fresh. When she has completed her task Emma happily gazes around to triple check it’s to her standard.

Satisfied with the result she hops into the shower. Afterwards she quickly dries herself and gets to work on her hair. Blow drying it but allowing the natural waves in her hair to show and putting some basic makeup on. She stands for a while in her underwear, debating what to wear. ‘Smart? No this isn’t a meeting! But I don’t want to be too casual…’ Emma goes back and forth through her clothes. Her eyes land on her skinny jeans a few times but something pulls her away from them.

Finally she settles on a dark green skater dress, finishing it off with a few accessories. Her swan necklace and some pearl studded earrings. The intercom buzzes by the door making Emma jump. She quickly gives herself the once over, spraying vanilla perfume in the air and walking through it.

She rushes to the intercom as it buzzes again.

“Please desist that awful sound! It is terribly annoying.”

A silky laugh resonates from the machine. “Well if you had answered the first time I wouldn't have had to keep pressing it!”

“True.” Emma grins into the intercom.

“So… you gonna let me in?”

“Maybe.” Emma quickly presses the button and allows Natalie into the building.

Emma gives the apartment another once over and nods at Henry who is getting up from the sofa. Showing he had changed into a shirt. Emma is at least pleased he’s put a bit of effort into what he’s wearing.

A loud knock echoes through the apartment and Emma flies to the door. Opening it to reveal a beaming Natalie wearing black skinny jeans, black boots and red wine sheer blouse. Her hair is tied back into a high ponytail and her makeup is subtle but makes her features pop.

“Hi.” Emma breathes out before hugging the redhead. For a moment her mind screams at her for diving in straight away as she realises this is the first time they’ve hugged. Though she is relieved to feel Natalie’s arm reach up and hug her in return.

Emma pulls away before waving the redhead into the apartment. “Welcome to our home.”

“Thank you. I didn’t know what you drank so I brought everything!” Nat laughs while bending down to pick up a case of beer and a bag full of jangling bottles.

“Aww you didn’t have too!” Emma smiles as she takes the goods off her friend and heads to the kitchen.

“Well I am the first guest around your apartment. Would be rude not to.” Natasha says while following behind the blonde. She smiles when she sees a teenage boy standing awkwardly by the sofa. “And you must be Henry.”

“Hi.” Henry says timidly.

Emma smirks at how shy Henry has gone. Certain that if she was standing next to him he’d hide behind her.

“I’ve heard a lot about you. Thay you are going to be the next Tony Stark of inventing?”

Henry beams at Natalie’s question. “That's the plan.” He moves to the other side of the island where the two women are standing by.

“He’s only a week in and already his coaches are impressed with him.” Emma says with pride while putting the drinks in the fridge. “What do you want Nat?”

“I’m happy with a beer.” The redhead responds, Emma passes her one and opens one for herself. Natalie takes a sip and focuses back on the teenager. “That is amazing Henry. It isn’t an easy camp to be in, they certainly don’t mess around.”

“Yea? How do you know?” Henry tilts his head curiously at her.

“I know a few people that work there.” She smiles at him as his eyes go wide.

“Do you know Mr Stark?” Henry can’t help but bounce on his feet, showing his excitement.

“I do actually.”

Both Mother and Son gape at her and Emma blinks at how she didn’t know this information. Nat sees this and her smile widens.

“But only from a few parties he has hosted.”

“That's so cool!! Did he get his Iron Man suit out?!” Henry continues to bounce on his feet and Emma grins at his enthusiasm.

“Not the full suit but he let me try his gauntlet on and shoot an ice sculpture.”

Emma laughs into her drink at how Henry’s eyes widen even more that they could almost fall out of his head.

“That-is- AWESOME!!” Henry whoops but Emma interrupts him from the barrage of questions she knew he was going to ask the redhead.

“So.” Emma claps her hands drawing the pair's attention. “What pizza shall we order?”

“Pizza!” Henry quickly zips over to the cupboard where they keep all their take-out menus.

“What do you guys normally get?” Natalie asks casually while sipping her beer.

“Well, we have a great pizza place down the road and we’ve actually been going through the menu. There are still a few we haven’t tried.” Emma licks her lips. “What do you say Rushman? Feeling brave?”

“Always.” Natalie says coolly, raising a sculpted eyebrow at her.

Henry bounds towards them and they look through the menu. Nat laughs at the ratings and notes the mother and son have put against the ones they have tried.

“How bout we try the BBQ supreme, the oceano special and the carbonara pizza?” Emma points at the different choices.

“Fish on pizza? Yuck!” Henry pulls a face of disgust, Emma rolls her eyes but Nat smiles widely at him and winks. Henry’s cheeks redden slightly and he quickly stares down at the menu.

“Okay-” Emma taps the island as she looks over the options again. Trying to figure out what her taste buds are telling her. “How about…”

“The Hawaiian?” Natalie asks seriously, noticing how no writings were near the selection, before bursting out laughing as Henry’s head snaps up, the disgust on his face deepening. “I’m kidding Henry.”

“Good!” Henry says with relief flooding his face.

The trio look back down at the menu. “How bout Granny’s pizza? That sounds nice.” Nat offers up as she points at the description of the pizza.

“Yea, sounds good.” Emma smiles at her and Henry nods. Emma picks up the phone and dials the number she’s learnt off by heart. Not surprised when her voice is recognised by the person answering.

She banters with the owner while she watches Henry guide Nat over to the sofa to show her Diablo III and make the redhead a character.

Emma grins at how the conversation between the pair flows easily. Especially when Henry asks her which superhero character she likes, ultimately getting into a debate about Supergirl and Superman.

When she hangs up the phone she quietly sighs in relief as she looks at the back of their heads, relieved that they are getting along, before walking over to join them.

-- -- --

The evening was a success and after Henry went to bed Emma and Nat stayed up talking well into the early hours of the morning. When they realised the time, Emma was adamant that Nat stays over and sets the sofa up for her.

In the morning Nat seamlessly fits in with the relaxed Saturday morning ritual of the Swans. Helping Henry with the pancake mixture while Emma cooked, though some flour did get tossed around between her and Henry. Both gave the blonde puppy dog eyes when she turned on them. Ultimately cleaning up after themselves but Nat gave Henry a mischievous look before placing her flour covered hand on Emma’s face. Causing Emma to shriek and chase after the redhead, promptly promoting Henry to chef.

After they ate they played a few board games and Henry couldn’t help but smile and laugh at how competitive the two women got against each other.

Eventually it was time for Nat to leave and both of the Swans were sad to see her go as they waved goodbye from their doorway.

When Sunday comes, the mother and son go for an adventure around New York and try a few places to eat that they have heard about. When they venture back into the apartment they feel truly stuffed and satisfied and ready for a Sunday nap.

The weeks pass and they fall into a comfortable routine of work and camp, followed by Friday nights with Nat, who mostly always stays over and sleeps on the sofa. Emma had offered for Nat to sleep in her huge bed with her, but Nat would always politely refuse. Stating she would probably kick Emma hard in the night.

Saturdays are filled with either Henry hanging out with his Mom and Nat or he would go out with Peter and Ned to the arcade or some other adventure. Secretly happy about this as it gives his Mom some time with Nat, who Henry suspects is increasingly becoming someone special to his Ma.

This becomes apparent when one early Monday morning Emma groans as she starts to wake up. She had been experiencing a good dream involving the brunette beauty she keeps seeing, but pain radiates from her stomach. Pulling Emma into consciousness with the feeling she’s being stabbed constantly. Sighing heavily, she slowly lifts herself up, whimpering at the pain and stumbles to the bathroom.

She goes to use the toilet and crack open an eye, her suspicions are confirmed.

Her period has started.

Normally she was on the pill but with the move she completely forgot about it. Sorting herself out with lidded eyes she manages to get back to her bed and collapses into it. She groans and curls up into a tight ball, gritting her teeth as another powerful cramp makes her whole body tense.

Somehow Emma falls back to sleep or falls unconscious, she isn’t sure, when a few hours later she is awoken by Henry knocking on her door but she doesn’t have the energy to answer him.

“Ma? Are you up?” Henry’s muffled voice calls through the door. Emma groans in response and starts to uncurl. Suddenly her eyes shoot open as she feels her stomach roll dangerously. She gags and stumbles to the en-suite, just making it before she vomits. “Ma?!” Henry’s panicked voice yells as he opens her bedroom door.

Emma wants to tell him she is okay, but her energy has been zapped. Instead she moans, her breathing becomes ragged and tears fall down her face as she continues to throw up. The cramps are becoming worse and worse. Her whole body aches and feels like she's been run over multiple times.

“I’m going to get help!” Henry is gone before she can say anything. Once her stomach has settled again she flushes and tries to get to her feet. But her body isn’t cooperating with her demands.

“Henry?” Her voice is weak and rough. She tries to move again but is horrified when another severe cramp causes nausea to bubble up and she’s throwing up again.

Gentle hands pull her damp hair back, making Emma jump.

“Sorry.” A soft velvet voice apologises. Nat grabs a hair tie from on top of the sink and ties the blonde’s hair into a loose bun on top of Emma’s head. She gently rubs Emma’s back, looking at her friend sympathetically.

“Grss-you-shnd’nt, be here.” Emma’s mumbles come out in strained gasps.

“That’s what best friends are for, right?” Nat says and looks up at Henry who stands nervously in the doorway of Emma’s en-suite. His worry etched on his face.

“Henry, can you get your Mom a bottle of water please?” She smiles comfortingly at the teenager and Henry nods, taking off towards the fridge. Her smile widens slightly when Emma flops back into her. The blonde’s head rests on Nat’s shoulder, but Nat's smile fades when she notes how pale Emma is. “Wow Em, what’s wrong?”

“Period.” Emma mutters and she swallows, trying to relieve the acidic pain in her throat.

“Poor Em.” Nat leans over slightly to flush the toilet. Causing Emma to whine with the movement. Henry re-enters the bathroom with the bottle of water. “Thank you Henry.” She says as she takes it from him.

“Is she going to be okay?” Henry's voice is small as he looks down at his Mom.

“Yea she’s going to be just fine.” Nat says, trying to reassure him. “Shouldn’t you get going?”

Henry nods looking at the time on his watch. “Will you stay with her?”

“Yes, I’ve already told Johnson we aren’t coming in today.”

“Okay, bye Ma, hope you feel better soon.”

“Bye Hen.” Emma groans out. The pair hear Henry move into the corridor and out the apartment door.

Nat opens the bottle. “Drink this Em.”

Emma sluggishly lifts her hand to take the bottle.

Nat frowns at the lack of energy Emma is displaying. “Are your periods always this bad?”

Emma nods her head. “When I forget to take my meds. Aren’t yours?”

Nat stays quiet for a moment and Emma turns her head to squint up at the redhead.

“Try and drink a few sips for me.” Nat says, obviously ending the subject and helps Emma manage to drink a bit more.

The redhead somehow even manages to grab some medication from a drawer nearby and not jolt the blonde. After swallowing them, Emma starts to settle back into the redhead. Resting her head on her shoulder again. But Nat knows she won’t be comfortable soon.

“Can you get up?” Nat looks down at the blonde but Emma doesn’t respond. “Em?”

A green eye slowly opens before another one.

“Hi there.” Nat smirks down at her friend as Emma’s eyes connect with hers. “Can you get up?”

Emma nods, slowly sitting up and reaching out for the sink. She’s almost up until her legs buckle, making her slip and almost hit her head on the porcelain. But two strong arms catch her.

“Wow, careful there Em!” Nat pulls the blonde towards herself and lifts her up carefully. If Emma was fully with it she’d be freaking out at how Nat easily lifts her. “Do you want to go back to bed or on the sofa?”

“Sofa, watch movie.” Emma sighs out, enjoying the feeling of being in the redhead’s arms.

“Good idea.” Nat says and carefully walks through the apartment, not wanting to jostle the blonde and lays Emma on the sofa, pulling a teal blanket over her. “What do you want to eat?”

“No food.” Emma groans with the thought of eating and places her arm over her eyes.

“Em, you need to eat something.” Nat says firmly while crossing her arms.

“Toast.” Emma whispers out and Nat moves towards the kitchen. “And I need my glasses.”

Nat quickly backtracks to the sofa and looks down at her friend. “You wear glasses?”

Emma moves her arm away and nods tiredly. “Normally wear contacts. Glasses are beside my bed.” Emma curls up as pain shoots through her. She hears Nat go into her room to get them.

“Wow Em you're blind!” Nat exclaims, amazed at how thick the lenses are and how blurry everything looks when she gazes through them. She carefully cleans them as she makes her way back to the sofa. “Here you go Em.” Nat holds the glasses out to her.

“Thanks Nat.” Emma says weakly.

“So, toast, anything else?” Nat looks down as Emma places the thick rimmed glasses on, making her eyes magnified.

“Apple juice please.”

“Okay.” Nat smiles at Emma and walks to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for the both of them. Already knowing where everything is she pops four slices of bread in the toaster. “I’m gonna have some scrambled eggs with the toast. Do you want any?”

“Yea please.” Emma’s weak voice calls out from the sofa.

After a few minutes Natalie places the food on the coffee table and looks over at the films on the bookcase. “What do you want to watch?”

“Erm… Before that.” Emma says nervously as she slowly sits up to face the redhead. Nat sees this and turns so she’s facing Emma as well, who fiddles with her hands and looks anxiously at Nat. Who tilts her head as she waits for Emma to continue. “Earlier you said, that’s what best friends are for and I…” Emma falters, feeling ridiculous and like a child for bringing it up.

“You what?” Natalie asks softly, but when it's clear Emma wasn’t going to continue her sentence, the redhead takes a deep breath. “Do you not want to be my best friend?”

“No! I mean I do! I just-” Emma runs a frustrated hand over her forehead, before flopping into the side of the sofa cushion. “I’ve never really had a best friend before. People have come close but I’ve never felt able to let them in or felt so at ease with someone before.” Emma panic when Nat just stares at her for a moment “And now I’ve ruined it and-”

“Em breathe.” Nat quickly cuts her off and takes Emma’s hand. Smiles fondly at her. “And I feel the same way. My work has become my life and it's nice to have someone I can share it and the other things with.”

“Other things?”

“Pizza, movies, walks in the park, kicking your ass in training-”

“Hey!” Emma protests weakly. “Not as much.” She grumbles and crosses her arms across her chest but winces at the pain.

“Okay, okay, not as much, not anymore at least.” Nat says while reaching out and unlocking Emma’s arms. “You need to stay relaxed.”

“Yes Mom.” Emma mutters and Nat chuckles, heading over to where the DVD’s are.

“So bestie! What is it you want to watch?”

“Tangled.” Emma says while playing with a loose thread on the blanket.

She smiles at the warm feelings radiating from her chest. Happy that her little confession hasn’t ruined anything with her friend, her best friend.

Emma is also relieved that she is starting to feel that the painkillers were taking effect in dulling the pain. Carefully she stretches her legs out and sighs heavily.

Nat reaches out for the DVD. “Tangled it is!” She quickly turns the Xbox on and puts the disc in. Walking back over to the sofa she lifts Emma’s legs so she can sit down. Gently places Emma’s legs on her lap and grabs the controller to start the film.

Soon the room is filled with Disney's intro music and the friends are whisked away on Repunzel’s adventure.

The waft of food reminds Emma she hasn’t eaten yet and she's pretty sure her stomach is beyond empty and will start to eat itself. Her stomach then growls, seemingly confirming Emma’s theory. Slowly Emma sits up removing her legs from Nat’s lap and sits cross legged.

“You can keep your feet there you know?” Natalie tells her softly, her attention momentarily moves off the screen and on the blonde beside her.

“Yea, but it would be harder to eat.” Emma gives the redhead a small smile.

“True.” Nat smiles back, especially when Emma drapes the blanket across both their laps and grabs their plates. Handing the redhead her portion.

The friends eat in silence as they watch Rapunzel and Flynn travel across the land to get to the Kingdom of Corona. They laugh at the jokes and Emma bounces along to the I have a dream song, causing Nat to grin at her.

Emma bellows with laughter when Flynn admits his name is Eugene. Nat doesn’t understand why it's that funny to Emma, but shrugs and chuckles with her anyway.

When Rapunzel and Eugene get to the Kingdom Nat notices Emma starting to get quieter. They continue to watch Rapunzel enjoy her birthday and get into a boat to watch the lanterns get released. When Rapunzel’s parents come on the screen, still devastated by the loss of their missing daughter, she hears Emma sniff. Nat looks at her blonde best friend from the corner of her eye and sees a few tears fall as Emma is transfixed by what is happening on the screen.

When the song begins and the King and Queen release the lantern, Emma’s tears fall quicker and she sniffs a few more times.

“You okay?” Nat asks softly. Emma nods her head and wipes her face under her glasses. Nat opens her arm out, beckoning Emma into her. Emma immediately shuffles over and falls into her best friend’s lap. She sighs in content as she rests her head on the crook of Nat’s arms.

The redhead gazes down at Emma and places her hand gently on Emma’s head. Softly moving her finger to stroke Emma’s head.

She looks back at the tv and sees the way Eugene watches Rapunzel. The adoration he feels for the blonde princess is clear.

Her hand and arm suddenly feels warm around Emma but she doesn’t want to pull away.

“I’d love for someone to look at me the way Eugene looks at her.” Emma says sadly with a sniff.

“One day, someone will.” Nat reaches down and squeezes Emma’s hand. Emma looks down at their joined hands and gives her a small smile through her tears.

“Yea, one day.” She wipes her wet face again. ‘Damn hormones!’

They continue watching the film and how things turn south when Mother Gothel makes Rapunzel believe Eugene doesn’t love her. Taking Rapunzel back to the tower, her prison.

Emma cheers when Eugene breaks free from the Kingdom’s prison after getting arrested by the guards and how Repunzel realises she is the lost princess.

But her mood soon grows solemn again when Eugene climbs Rapunzel's hair only to find her gagged and chained. She leans back further into Nat when Eugene is stabbed by Gothel and they watch the sequence unfold that leads to Eugene cutting Repunzel’s hair. Freeing her from Gothel who trips and falls out of the tower, becoming dust before she hits the ground.

Nat frowns at the tv as Eugene is dying in Rapunzel’s arms. She breathes a sigh of relief when Rapunzel’s tear gives Eugene another chance. As the scene switches to Rapunzel’s parents, Nat feels Emma tense up and feels her arm getting wet with tears as the parents rush to meet their lost daughter.

When Repunzel’s Mother slowly approaches Rapunzel, looking at her in awe and wonder and realising it is her daughter, Emma lets out a quiet sob. Her shoulders shake when the mother and daughter hug and Emma lets out another sob as the father joins the hug.

Emma buries her head into the crook of Nat’s arm and openly weeps.

“Hey, Em, what’s wrong?” Nat says concerned but Emma just shakes her head and continues crying. Nat carefully turns Emma over and lifts her slightly so she can hold her in a tight hug. Confused and worried at how Emma is reacting.

The blonde buries her head into the redhead’s shoulder, cursing her hormones. “It’s- stupid.” Emma’s muffled voice breaks as she continues to cry into the redhead’s shoulder.

“What is?” Nat rubs her hand over Emma’s back, trying to soothe her.

“My parents- do they- think of me? Do they light- a candle- on my birthday? Do they regret giving- me up?” Emma voices out her deepest thoughts to her best friend.

Nat sighs as she begins to understand what Emma is thinking. “Oh Em.” For the first time in a while Nat doesn’t know what to say. So she just continues to hold her best friend, looking down at the broken woman in her arms.

Soon Emma’s sobs fade and her breathing slows down. “Sorry.” Emma feels embarrassed and starts to move out of Nat’s arms.

“It’s fine Em.” She holds on, not allowing Emma to move. “I know you don’t really want to get up.”

Emma stops trying and nods. Settling back in the comforting embrace. Her eyes grow heavy and before she knows it she is asleep.

Nat smiles sadly down at Emma and places a gentle kiss on the blonde’s head before she reaches out to the remote beside her and settles back to watch some tv.

(Part Five)

[fand0m-obsess3d-g33k]

White Dahlia (Cordelia x Reader)

Summary: What happens when a prank of Madison’s goes differently than expected and Cordelia is put in a situation that gets hairy?

Words: 4,295 

Warning: Alcohol consumption

Author’s Note: This is some fluffy fluff with a little bit of angst. It was super fun to write :) I wanted to have this be dedicated to @paulsonfaygo​ for being the sweetest of sweethearts and deserves so much love and cuddles especially Cordelia cuddles! Hope this makes you feel all fluffy inside! Mwah!! <3

P.S. Any feedback you have I would greatly appreciate it thank you!

Cordelia had been teaching the girls how to make potions the past week which was one of her favorite things to teach since she got to be in the greenhouse, her favorite part of the academy. It was always her safe haven whenever she needed to clear her head. She finished rearranging everything in the greenhouse so that everything was in its place as it had been before the last lesson today, once done she walked into the kitchen. The girls were all in bed by this time so she knew she could just settle down now and read a book in peace, not that she minded the girls she loved them all to bits, however they were exhausting at times. In the kitchen the blonde went to grab the vanilla creamer only to find it was gone, sighing she decided to settle for adding some milk and a little of vanilla extract that sat on a shelf on the spice rack. A few pages into her novel the blonde felt a warmth spread through her body making her set the book down on the couch before standing up, within seconds the woman landed with a hard thud on the floor yet not feeling any pain. Confused the woman tried to grab onto the couch to get up but noticed that her hand was now a white paw.  

“What the hell?”  

Oh, good she could still speak she thought. Now time to confront one of the girls to see if they know something about this. The once regal, tall headmistress frowned as she looked up at the staircase that once was so easy to climb every day that now seemed like an exhausting task. After a few stairs she overstepped causing her to trip a bit hitting her cheek on the stair. She shook her head quickly to erase the pain.  

“C’mon Cordelia, you were blind for Goddess sake and climbed these damn stairs you can do this as a cat.” With the pep talk she managed to practically run up the stairs to sit in front of Zoe’s door since none of the girls ever had their doors open during the night. “Zoe, Zoe!”  

There was a pitter patter of feet until the young witch opened the door, she looked confused until the headmistress said her name again followed by “down here.”  

“Miss Cordelia? Y-You're a... how did this happen?” She asked getting down to be more level with the cat.  

“May I come in?” Her paw pointing behind Zoe. Which made the girl step aside to let Cordelia through before shutting the door. “I was hoping you could tell me how this happened. I imagine one of you replaced vanilla extract with a transformation potion. Which I’m not sure how that could’ve happened because I never taught that to you girls for this exact reason.”  

“I’ve only made the potions you had taught us Miss Cordelia. I would never veer off your lesson plan, I know you don’t add certain criteria because of the dangers or the fact that there are different levels.”  

The young witch watched as the once blonde now white-haired feline was looking at herself in the full-length mirror that sat on the floor of Zoe’s room leaning against the corner of her dresser and wall. First, she took note of still mismatched eyes, her normal brown eye color with the other eye the icy blue that Myrtle had gotten you, then small white paws came up to her head touching her ears that bent as she pushed the paws forward, lastly, she turned to the side and spun in a circle to analyze her fluffy white tail.  

Zoe felt a ping of hurt as she watched her headmistress sit in front of the mirror with her fluffy head down in sadness. She walked over and sat beside Cordelia on the floor before petting her head to which she flicked her head away. “Sorry...maybe we could ask Queenie, and Madison. Although all of my bets are on Madison.”  

They both walked to Queenie’s room to which she yelled “holy shit,” when Cordelia talked until, they both calmed her down so she could explain if she had seen anyone put the potion there or even making it but to no avail. This redirected you both to Madison’s room. The headmistress instructed Zoe to forego knocking and to just enter the room, normally Cordelia would never do this but right now she was irritated. Zoe closed the door behind them and watched as the feline ran and jumped onto Madison Montgomery’s bed. She gracefully walked up her sleeping form before swatting the girl in the face claws retracted of course so it was more like a slap.  

“The shit...Zoe! Why the hell is there a disgusting cat in my room? Get it out of here!” She practically shrieked before a paw landed on her mouth silencing her while the other slapped her again.  

“Madison what in the hell did you do?” Cordelia accused sharply her ears going back in anger.  

“Oh. My. God. Cordy? You were only supposed to have like a beard or something for like a day not turn into a cat.” The actress’ eyes wide in surprise and shock. “This is too good wait until Y/N finds out that you’re a cat! She’s going to flip! Probably not going to be able to look at you the same after she finds out that you have to use a litter box now. She’s totally getting put on litter duty.”  

The feisty feline hisses at Madison before lunging herself at her face, claws still retracted but her little paws were a fury of white streaks attacking her.

“Reverse this, now Madison!”  

“I don’t know how Cordy, I don’t even know how I did it. I think we need to wait for it to wear off.”  

The actress wouldn’t admit it out loud but she’s glad the headmistress decided to not attack her again. Instead, she hopped down from the bed and walked into the hallway down to her room leaving the other girls standing in the hallway listening to the woman grumble to herself.  

You woke up to the sounds of soft meows in the hallway and you darted to the door to open in leaving you standing in the doorway in your oversized button down and underwear. “Oh my gosh! Where did this sweet little thing come from? Is it a boy or a girl? Where did you find them?” The flurry of questions escaped your mouth so fast you didn’t even take a breath in between while you bent down to call the cat by making a clicking noise with your mouth. In response the cat lets out another meow. “So cute!”  

“Y/N, you can’t hear her?” Zoe asks.

“What are you talking about? Of course, I can, it’s the cutest little meow I’ve ever heard! Yes, it is.” You cooed while reaching out to scratch behind the white cat’s ear, a purr erupted from her chest and her eyes closed in delight from the feeling for just a moment.

The girls at the end of the hallway looked at each other in shock and confusion. Zoe was the one to speak once again.

“We found her outside around the greenhouse. She seemed cold so we brought her in.” She lied.

“Oh, we should ask Miss Cordelia if we can keep her.” You suggested in excitement.

“NO!” The girls both said in unison.  

“Right, we don’t want to wake her. Alright, tomorrow afternoon we will ask then.” You said firmly not wanting the girls to try and sneak this little secret past the headmistress. She hated when the girls kept things like this a secret. “C’mon little kitty, do you want to come lay with me?”  

In response the cat looked at the girls down the halls before turning back to you and meowing following you into the room. You proceeded to close the door but this time before settling back into bed you grabbed a folded blanket that was laying on your ottoman at the end of your bed across the foot of the bed so the cat had a comfier place to sleep.  

“There you go. That should keep you cozy.”  

The cat jumped up on the bed and walked in a circle kneading the blanket to get comfortable before laying down curled in a little white ball at the foot of your bed. “Goodnight kitty. We’ll have to think of a name for you tomorrow, hopefully Miss Cordelia lets us keep you. She loves animals so I’m sure she will be okay with it plus; you have Delia’s eyes.” You smile brightly.  

Cordelia’s heart swelled up at the sound of the nickname leaving your mouth. You had only ever addressed her as Miss Cordelia. Even when she gave you permission to use her name without the formal title you had never done so, until now.  

The next morning Cordelia woke up; still finding herself with paws and a tail when she stretched out. Her missed match eyes fell on your sleeping form, she didn’t want to wake you but knew that you should get up to get breakfast and she was even hungry too if she was honest. Her little paws made her their way over to you where she sat on your chest before nuzzling her face into yours with a strong purr. She hears you grumble which quickly turns into a giggle.  

“Good morning sweet girl.” You said before slowly getting up from the bed to take a shower. The comment caused the headmistress to feel a warmth through her body and more purring started.

15 minutes later  

The feline looked up at the bathroom door that opened revealing you wrapped in a towel with wet hair. For once the blonde witch was glad that she was a cat so you couldn’t see the blush that would’ve been clearly visible on her pale complexion. She quickly leapt from the bed to the door and began scratching at it hoping that you would open the door to let her out. Instead, you bent down to pick her up and poked her head out of the door and called for Zoe. In answer to your call and to Cordelia’s horror Zoe, Queenie and Madison all came up staring between you and Cordelia in your arms.  

“Oh, this day is so damn awesome.” Madison laughed until her laughter stopped due to Queenie nudging the skinny blonde with her elbow.  

“Miss Cordelia is out on an important task and won’t be back for a while Y/N.” Zoe stated.  

At the words Cordelia felt the change in your grasp on her, she felt the sadness radiate off of you before setting her on the floor.  

“Zoe, would you mind running to the store and getting Dahlia some cat stuff. Just the essentials...you know until D-Miss Cordelia comes back?”  

Your voice was so low but the older woman’s new cat hearing was strong enough to pick up on how her ‘new name’ was strongly close to her own name and the fact that you almost slipped up and called her by your nickname instead of her formal title.  

“Sure Y/N. Do you want your usual Captain and coke too?” Zoe asked.  

To which you nodded and went to get dressed in more pjs then proceed to lay back down.  

A whole day passes and Cordelia gets fed real food as instructed by herself with a surprisingly intimidating look from the usually sweet woman, and taken care of by the other girls but hasn’t seen any sign of you which made her begin to worry.  

“I think we should tell Y/N that you are Dah--” Zoe starts.  

“NO! Zoe I can't let her see me like this it’s bad enough you girls do especially Madison.” Her mismatched eyes rolled in annoyance.

“You may change your mind when you see how she is Cordy, she’s like a puppy dog around you it’s pathetic. I mean I know you were blind when you first met Y/N but I swear even with new eyes you’re just as blind. She’s a wreck when you are gone...it’s honestly so sad, and that’s coming from me.” Madison shudders at her admission of empathy before taking a drag off of a cigarette.  

“She’s right, Miss Cordelia...you should go see her.” Queenie suggests.

You heard loud meowing outside of your door to which you opened the door to see the fluffy, regal looking feline looking up at you with a cocked head as if she asked ‘what’s wrong’.  

“C’mon Dahlia you can come in sweet girl.” you closed the door once again behind her.  

The older witch noticed your red tear-stained cheeks, your red puffy eyes and an almost empty bottle of rum on her bedside table. It pained her to see you so sad, she approached you and spoke your name softly yet all you heard was a soft meow in response. You began to pet the sweet cat which made her nuzzle into your hand and begin purring loud. You reached over to take a swig of your captain straight from the bottle hiccupping afterwards then settled in the bed on your back holding a sweater. Cordelia’s sweater, one she had given you one-night months ago when she noticed you were cold, you had never returned and hoped that the headmistress wouldn’t notice. It turns out that the older woman had forgotten all about it until she stared at it with wide eyes now. To make sure she wasn’t losing her mind Cordelia walked up your form and settled herself on your chest, looking down at the material then proceeding to make eye contact.  

“You have the prettiest eyes, the same as Delia’s. She has the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen even! I know the blue one doesn’t technically belong to her; I also knows she gets self-conscious of it but she tries not to show it. Even if she still had both of her brown eyes, she’s just so gorgeous how could she not see it? I know her mother drilled a lot of her bullshit lies into her head but can’t she see how wonderful she is?”  

Cordelia wanted to cry at the sweet words, she wanted to hug you, to tell you that she felt the same way.  

“Oh Dahlia,” you sob sitting up and hugging the cat and sweater closer to your chest, “What if she doesn’t come back? What if she gets hurt? I love her so much; she can’t get hurt. I know I shouldn’t love her but I can’t get rid of these feelings, I’ve tried so many times because I know she will never feel the same. Delia, please come home.” The tears just wouldn’t stop, not until you were wrapped up in your blankets in the shape of a ball, the cat in your arms snuggled to you not being able to sleep a wink yet stayed put to bring you comfort.

Another night passed just the same as that one but the next one Cordelia, still in cat form, waited for you to fall asleep before she padded down the stairs, she reluctantly drank out of the bowl that the girls had purchased. The mere thought of having to drink from a bowl absolutely embarrassed her so she tried to do so as little as possible around you. The woman had also pleaded that the girls put wine or some form of alcohol in the bowl to which they refused knowing it would cause more harm than good. Rolling her eyes at the remembrance she gracefully walked back into the living room to lay down on the couch.  

“What if something happened? What if she’s dead?” The panicked questions that came from your cracking voice fell upon Cordelia’s ears, she wanted to nuzzle into you as she had nights before when you were falling apart however, when she attempted to sit up, she had a splitting headache and the room was spinning a bit.  

“She’s fine Y/N! Miss Cordelia is always cautious; she always comes home to us.” Zoe said calmly.

“You don’t know that she’s fine just because she’s cautious doesn’t mean something couldn’t happen! I can’t lose her Zoe and now I can’t find Dahlia either.”  

Your sobs came out in ragged breathes as you unconsciously put your weight on Zoe as she helps you descend the staircase. It was so hard for you to stay up on your feet thinking about the fact that you may never see Cordelia again and that your love for her would always go unsaid to her beautiful face. Zoe had a hold of your waist when you both entered the living room that is until you got to the couch where you saw the person that you had been so distressed over. Limbs weakened against the other witch and you dropped on your knees in front of the Headmistress, who looked positively exhausted and was lying in a naked heap on the couch. Within seconds you found your bearings and abruptly grabbed the blanket at the end of the furniture to give the older woman some warmth and less of any sense of exposure. Your hands made their way to her blonde tresses twirling some pieces around your finger relishing in the feeling of her soft locks you wanted to bury your hands in it and pull her to you feeling her soft lips against yours, the feeling was so overwhelming. That impulse was quickly released as you remembered that you may regret it or she may get mad so you settled for a soft kiss to the woman’s forehead.  

“Delia, I’m so glad you’re back, are you okay?”  

She nods and tries her best to nuzzle into your hand that is now petting her hair at the side of her face.  

“I have a terribly painful headache and the room spins when I sit up.” She looks to Zoe and asks her for some Tylenol making you jump up to get it for her instead wanting to do anything to make your Headmistress feel better when a hand tightly grabs your arm. “Stay, come lay down.” Her velvet voice tells you while wrapping the blanket around her so her naked form didn’t touch you and you had room to fit your body against her on the outside of the couch. This request was certainly a strange one although you found it pointless to argue with the older witch so you did as she asked and settled against her on the couch. Her one arm came around your midsection to hold you closer, this made your heartbeat race. Zoe came back and gave her the Tylenol before walking back upstairs to let the girls know of Miss Cordelia’s “return”. A moment later your breath hitched as you felt Delia’s hot breath against your ear, you involuntarily shivered. “I apologize for causing you such distress sweetheart. I didn’t know I worried you that much.”  

You didn’t say anything to her in return your mouth was so dry and honestly your brain was still trying to catch up with the fact that she was back, Delia was back and safe. It didn’t occur to you until a skinny finger swiped your cheek that you were sobbing once again, this time tears of relief.  

Hours later you awoke in the same place that you were on the couch before beside Cordelia. You shifted slightly trying not to wake the blonde but to your surprise she was already awake, when your eyes met hers of honey you felt that urge to kiss her. As you had this thought you noticed that her face was closer to yours; mouths centimeters away, sharing the same breath. Did you move closer? Did she? You weren’t sure but your nerves overtook you causing you to whisper snapping you both out of the moment. “Are you feeling better?”  

She nods biting her lip and looking down at the blanket that her fingers had begun to fidget with. You kissed her forehead, closing your eyes as you did so; inhaling the scent of lavender and vanilla that was Cordelia. So, lost in the comforting scent of your headmistress you failed to take note of her change in breathing, short heavier breathes causing her chest to rise and fall quicker.  

“I’d like to go up and get dressed. Will you wait outside my bedroom for me please sweetheart? We have some things we need to discuss.”  

You nod and she smiles before getting up with the blanket wrapped around her down to about an inch past her knees. As much as you tried to look away you couldn’t take your eyes off of her beautiful shaped legs as she walked up the staircase.  

Once she opened the door it was like you hadn’t seen her in years her beauty was just radiating and if you moved closer to her you felt as if you’d be burnt. She wore a black dress with emerald green flowers on it, the sleeves were cuffed at her skinny wrists which was the case with most of Cordelia’s fashion. The dress hugged her slender body in all the right places, her hair was brushed creating large soft curls, making you want to run your fingers through it again, her neck line was rather low on the dress just enough to show a large expanse of skin at the older woman’s neck and chest area. That’s when you saw it. Emerald green velvet strap with a matching emerald rhinestone surrounded by diamonds in the middle. The collar. Dahlia’s collar. What the fuck?  

Cordelia was watching you take in her appearance and she decided to let you enjoy the view before smiling and asking you to come in. You both sat next to each other on the bed facing each other.  

“M-Miss Cordelia where did you get that? Did the girl’s already talk to you about Dahlia? I was going to talk to you about her. W-why are you wearing her collar?”  

It’s not strange that you hadn’t heard of such a potion yet with your studies so it was understandable for you to be confused. Cordelia’s hand came up to touch the velvet collar before taking your hand in her other. She began explaining the situation. Leaving you staring at her in disbelief and shock.

“S-so you were Dahlia this whole time? Why didn’t you tell me that was you?” I was so angry how could she not tell me and then have the girls tell me that she was gone and have me worrying.  

“Yes, I was Dahlia. I’m so sorry Y/N, for some reason as a cat I was able to talk to the other girls but all you heard when I talked were meows. I’m not sure why that was but I asked the girls to not inform you of the transformation because it was rather embarrassing for me to have the person, I have feelings for see me like that. Although, I quickly felt regret at not telling you sooner when I saw how much pain my absence caused you.” Her voice soft and even throughout and only wavering at the end when you noticed tears started to form in her mismatched eyes.  

“Miss Cordelia, I confessed my feelings to a cat and that cat was actually you! Then I was a mess in front of you, and god you probably think I’m the most disgusting person, I’m so sorry. Can we just forge--” I paused as I replayed her last few sentences “Wait...did you say feelings? Y-You have feelings for me back?” A pain in your chest was still prominent as you asked this making it seem like you were just dreaming that she had said those words, like you were clinging on to the smallest chance that maybe this was mutual.  

A tear was falling down the older woman’s cheek but a smile graced her face. “Yes, Y/N, I have had feelings for you for a while but I never imagined that they were reciprocated but when you told Dahlia...well me about those feelings all I wanted to do was kiss you and hold you. I wanted to take all of your pain away, I’m so sorry sweetheart. Can I hold you now please?” She asked shyly while you brushed away her tear and nodded.  

You both laid on the bed you on your side, head on Delia’s chest listening to her heartbeat which brought you so much comfort. It still didn’t feel like this was real, you needed confirmation. So, you lifted your head to look at the older woman who smiled at you with the brightest pearly whites that always lit up your day.  

“Delia?”

“Yes, sweetheart?”  

“Can I kiss you?”  

She grabbed your face in both hands and lead you up her body those extra inches you needed to meet your lips with hers. At first it was just a peck, then a deeper longing kiss followed by another, your index finger grazed the collar at her throat and lightly passed over her soft skin of her neck. The action seemed possessive and it caused the older woman to smile into the kiss, making you do the same before it eventually became a heated session of tangled hands and kisses. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach and you realized this was everything you ever needed. Cordelia Goode was yours.  

Taglist: @paulsonfaygo​, @versonstar​, @pearplate

[13-reasons-ideas]

Marry Me - Monty’s Perspective

A/N: Here it is. I’m so sorry this took so long to put out. I was having a really hard time getting into the right headspace to write this. I hope you guys like it! I recommend listening to Thomas Rhett’s Marry Me when you read this. As usual, feedback is appreciated and much love! -Em

Ellie was coming back into town for her engagement party this weekend. I was the first person she called when Evan proposed. She damn near gave me a heart attack when I answered, and she was scream-crying.

Flashback

I was watching the Chargers game when Ellie called. “Hey Elliebear.”

“Heaskedmetomarryhim.” She screeched on the other line. I had no idea what she said. It sounded like she was crying. And that I would be deaf in one ear. I pulled the phone away from my head until she stopped freaking out.

“What was that?”

“Evan proposed.” What?

“Oh?”

“And I said yes. I’m getting married Montgomery.” Oh.

“That’s great Ellie. Congratulations. I’m happy for you.” I cleared my throat, trying to get rid of the pit that was forming.

“Thank you. I wanted you to be the first one to know, so I just wanted to call you quick. I can hear the game in the background, and we have more people to call so I’ll let you go now.”

“Okay, tell Evan I said hi and congratulations.”

“I will. Bye Monty.”

“Bye Ellie.” I hung up and sat back on the couch. She’s getting married.

End flashback

I was on break at work when I got a text from Ellie.

Hey you. I just got into town with Evan for the weekend. Are you free tonight?

I texted her back a few minutes later, yeah I’m free. What’s up?

She replied right away. Drinks or coffee? Just you and me. My parents are going over some details for tomorrow with Evan that they don’t want me around for.

Sure. Meet you at Monet’s at six?

I’ll save you a seat. Usual order?

You know I don’t change things Elliebear.

I stopped at home to change after work into something more comfortable. I grabbed a clean pair of jeans and a random t-shirt before grabbing an old flannel and running out the door, so I wasn’t late.Ellie barely beat me to the café. It wasn’t surprising really, since she was always the early one.

“Hey, what can I get you this evening?” the barista asked her.

“Can I get a-”

“She’ll get a skinny vanilla bean latte with only one pump of vanilla, a dash of cinnamon, and extra foam in a for here cup. I’ll get a regular black coffee. And she’ll also have the chicken and spinach sandwich.” I said behind her. The barista looked at her, unsure if she should ring it in or not. Ellie nodded and turned around to face me. Before I had a chance to say anything, she jumped into my arms for a hug.

“Hey Elliebear.” I grunted.  

“I missed you.”

“I missed you too.”

Our orders were finished quickly as it was surprisingly slow for a Friday night. Luckily, that meant our table was free. We sat down and conversation flowed easily. It was almost like we had never been apart.

“The ring is nice. It suits you. Bigger than I thought you would like but it’s nice.”

“It is nice, yeah. That reminds me, Evan said he’s looking forward to meeting you tomorrow.”

“So am I. See who finally caught your interest.”

“I was interested in other people before Evan.” She told me, scandalously. Sure, you did El. I didn’t let myself think about the possibility of her liking me that way when we were younger.

“Ellie. That guy from drama class doesn’t count. And neither does your chemistry partner.”

“I was not interested in Adam. And Zach was my chemistry partner. I can assure you I was not into him.”

“Please, enlighten me as to these people you were interested in before Evan.”

“There was,” she paused. “Dylan from sophomore English was cute. Ian. Couple other guys in high school. Peter from my first year anthropology class was… very attractive, and smart.”

“One guy aside from Evan? University of Georgia is a big school. There’s no way you only had eyes for two people.”

“I was busy. I practically lived in the library when I wasn’t in class or my dorm. What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Is there a girl I should be hearing about? Or should have heard about?”

“Nah. Nothing important or anything to write home about. I was busy.” I wouldn’t call what I did, dating. The point wasn’t to find someone to bring home. Who I wanted to bring home was over 900 miles away.

“Oh please Monty, you played ball at OSU. You honestly expect me to believe there was no girl in your life?”

“No, no. There were girls. Just nothing really serious.”

“Uh, huh.” She replied, sarcastically. We reached for our cups at the same time and our hands brushed. I was immediately transported back to the day of homecoming in senior year.

Flashback

“Remember students. The homecoming game is tonight at 6:30. You’ll want to be there early as our Liberty Tigers take on the Hildebrandt Mustangs if you want good seats. It’s sure to be a nail biter.” Principal Bolan’s voice boomed from the intercom during the morning announcements.

“Don’t know why he’s hyping it up to be a nail biter.” Scott laughed.

“We are playing Hildebrandt. We could literally not show up and still win.” I joked. “Have any of you seen Ellie? She’s usually here to force me to English by now.”

“Nah man.” Scott replied.

“Need lover girl to make sure you do what you’re supposed to?” Bryce teased.

“Fuck off. It’s not like that with us.” Unfortunately.

“Sure it’s not Monty. I refuse to believe you never hit it.”

“Don’t talk about her like that.” I threatened, lowly. Don’t push it man. Bryce shut up at my tone. “I’m going to go try and find her. I’ll see you guys at lunch.”

She was arranging her books when I found her at her locker. She was trailed by Clay and Alex. I pulled her into my arms and lifted off the ground. “Montgomery, put me down!” she laughed.

“Never.” I laughed, evilly.

“I have to grab my chem book. And go to chemistry.”

“I’ve got it.” Zach said as he grabbed her book, “you carrying her to class today?”

“Nah, I thought about it but since I had to come find her this morning, I figure she can make it there on her own.”

“I was running late. My alarm didn’t go off when it was supposed to.”

“Excuses, excuses.” I replied, putting her down and shaking my head.

“I’ll see you guys later? Zach and I are running late.”

“Sure. Justin said if I don’t go to the game tonight, he’d tell mom and dad about Ani. And I don’t want to deal with that.”

“Someone has to keep Clay company, so I have to go too.” Alex said, pushing clay lightly.

“Great. I’ll see you then. See you at lunch Monty.”

I sat through just about the driest English class of my life, counting the minutes on my watch. Math was no better. We were reviewing for a test that almost the whole

class failed. Somehow that was our fault for not studying enough. I let out a sigh of relief when the lunch bell rang.

The table was already mostly full when Ellie came and sat next to me. “Ellie, think you could pray for us to not lose this game tonight?” Bryce sniggered from the end of the table.

“Hey, quit being a dick.” I stated. Bryce responded by chucking a grape at me. I threw it back at him. I knew how important her faith was to her. Some things just weren’t okay to be joked about or questioned. When it came to Ellie, faith was one of them.

“It’s fine Monty. Not like he hasn’t done it before.” I know he has. I don’t like it. “It’s going to take a lot more than God to help you win if you don’t learn to throw better than that in the next six hours. But sure.” I watched her from the corner of my eye as she smirked to herself before beginning. I’d seen her pray for real before. This wasn’t that. “Lord, please help the guys win tonight. Give them the ability to not trip over themselves when they make plays. And God, please show Bryce how to make the ball go where it’s supposed to and not hit some poor kid in the head again. Maybe, just maybe, then he will get laid tonight and we all know that’s really why he asked me to pray.” She smirked at Bryce. I choked on my juice. She probably isn’t wrong. Was pretty funny when that kid got hit though.

“You need to quit hanging out with Monty, he’s rubbing off on you too much. And I was serious.”

“I know. I’ll do it for real after lunch. You can sit with me if you want.” She was true to her word. I was late for Geography because I was watching her sit in an empty alcove praying. Bryce didn’t sit with her.

The locker room was abuzz with excitement. It was the homecoming game. Not to mention our season opener. If we wanted to start the season off right, we had to win. Sure, we joked around about Hildebrandt being an easy team to beat-they came in second to last in the league last year-but there was still a chance they would pull off a miracle. Especially if Bryce threw like he did at lunch. “Yo Monty, is Ellie coming to Monet’s tonight?”

“She said she would. Not that she’ll give you the time of day.” I waved off Matt’s question. She’s not interested. Trust me. Find someone else to have your eyes on. Several ‘oooo’s were voiced around us.

“How do you know?”

“Just do, man.”

“I could treat her real nice. She’d beg me for more.” Are you fucking kidding me?

“Oh shit.” Someone muttered, seriously. I didn’t really hear who it was. The sound of my blood rushing in my ears was too loud. Coach Kerba wasn’t in the room. He was talking to Banes about plays. No one in here will snitch. Not when it’s about Ellie.

I immediately turned towards him and cornered him against his locker. The rest of the team stood silently, watching us. I got real close to his face so only he would hear me. “You even think about her like that again and I will bury you so deep they’ll need ground penetrating radar to find you. Not that they’d recognize you if anyone found your body. If you so much as brush against her too hard in the halls, I’ll break your jaw. You understand Carraway?”

“Y-yeah. I got you. Never said a word.” He breathed in response. I had scared the living shit out of him. Good. I stepped away from him and after a few beats the incident was forgotten and the mood was light again.

The game wasn’t that exciting. Had it not been homecoming, most people probably wouldn’t have shown up. As expected, it was in our favour most of the first half. Ellie waved at me between plays. She was practically beaming. During the second half Hildebrandt seemed to find their groove and the game was at least interesting to play. It wasn’t the nail biter Principal Bolan had promised this morning. Everyone knew that regardless of how we played, we would end up winning. The game ended and the team and the crowd were excited. Matt and Garrison were so excited by the win, they tripped over their own feet and faceplanted on the sidelines. The excitement died down for a moment until they shot up and went on celebrating.

I waited for Ellie outside the locker room, as per our tradition. “Good game.” She called.

“Of course, it was. I was on the field.” I smirked.

“Modest as ever I see.”

“Do you expect anything else at this point Elliebear?” “Not really. But I can hope, maybe one day.”

“Maybe, but not likely.”

“Oh hey, while I’m thinking about it, Clay asked me to keep an eye on Justin tonight.”

“Is everything okay?” My brow furrowed.

“I think so. Clay said something about him having issues adjusting and stuff. Do you think you can play nice with him for a while?”

“I suppose, since he is your friend, I can try and be nice for a while. But not all night. I want some Ellie time.” Only because it’s you asking.

“And you’ll get your Ellie time. After you make nice with Justin.”

I sighed, making it seem like a hassle just to get a rise out of her. I was about to respond when Bryce called us, “are you two going to stand there and chit chat all night or are we going to celebrate?”

“We’re coming. Give us a minute asshole.” I called back to him. Bryce didn’t respond.

I turned around so I could give her a piggyback out to the car. “Hop on”. Once she felt secure, I walked us out to the parking lot. I pretended to not pay attention when she stole my baseball hat. She couldn’t see the way my smirk turned into a smile when she did.

“That’s my hat El.”

“I know. I happen to like it though, so I’m wearing it.”

“I’m not getting it back tonight, am I?”

“Nope. It is now mine. Might even write my name in it.”

“You do that Ellie. I won’t care when I steal it back who’s name it has in it.” Already has my name in it. Yours would just complete it.

“Fine. Then I’ll readjust it.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“Oh, I would.”

I set her down at her car. “No, you wouldn’t.” I called her bluff. You’re too sweet to do it. Or you’d fix it right away if you did. She rolled her eyes at me.

“Whatever. I’ll see you at Monet’s in a few with your precious hat.” I waited until she got in her car and drove off, before starting my own engine and following her.

Ellie beat me to Monet’s as usual. I nodded at and stopped to chat with some of my teammates when I came in. Matt nodded awkwardly at me as I passed. I glared in return. My coffee was set across from her when I got to our table. “I see you told the truth. Can I have it back now?”

“No. I think it looks quite fetching on me, if I do say so myself.”

“Fetching?”

“Yes. Do you disagree?”

“No, I think it looks good on you.” Not that anything would look bad on you. Suits her. She’s wearing my shirt.

“That’s what I thought.”

We chatted quietly before Justin showed up. “Hey guys.” He waved.

“Justin! You made it.” She exclaimed, too excitedly. Making him think you were forced to babysit him by being overly happy isn’t going to help Elliebear. I shot her a tone it down look. Justin smiled uncomfortably as she offered up her seat. “Make room.”

“Can do sweetheart.” I flirted, patting the chair next to me. The smile and blush she tried to mask didn’t go unnoticed.

“Thanks for the coffee Ellie.” Justin said, taking a sip.

“No problem.” The three of us chatted idly for a while. I was on my best behaviour with Justin and even laughed a few times at couple things he said. There was no mention of what he witnessed in the locker room.

My hand found Ellie’s under the table and I grasped it carefully. I had to make it look like I hadn’t done it intentionally. I could see the pink flare of her cheeks and my lip twitched upwards.

“Hey Justin, come over here and look at this.” Charlie called. He was looking at something on Garrisons’ phone. Justin left us to go investigate. I caught the quick glance at our hands, even if Ellie didn’t. Thank you, Foley.

“And then there were two.” I muttered, pulling her from her thoughts.

“Then there were two.” She repeated.

“That shirt looks good on you. It’s pretty familiar too.”

“Oh, yeah. There may be a reason for that.” She seemed nervous.

“Need to go talk to Mike?”

“Not if you don’t have a problem with it. I think he would agree it was simply borrowing, rather than stealing. No need to involve Jesus.”

“I am. So now you’ve got my shirt and my hat. Anything else you intend on taking of mine?” I slowly inched closer to her. We have never gone here. But there’s no way she doesn’t feel this pull.

“Possibly. Depends what else you’re willing to offer.” She said, coyly. My fingers itched to brush the hair from her face. She beat me to it.

“I think there’s a thing or two I could offer you Ellie.” I replied, leaning in a little more. What am I doing? What if she doesn’t feel the same way. Am I about to ruin our friendship? Do I even care? Before I could kiss her, fucking Bryce Walker beckoned from across the room. Son of a bitch. You couldn’t wait two god damn seconds, could you? This better be important.

I stopped just short of kissing her. “What?” I answered, curtly.

“My place, half an hour.” He called back. That is what was so important you had to interrupt this moment? That could have waited. Fucker. I nodded in response and turned back to Ellie, hoping the moment wasn’t gone. I knew it was though. I sighed internally. She was smiling at me, but it didn’t reach her eyes like it normally did. She’s upset. I didn’t know what to say to try and salvage our moment. Instead, I watched her take a sip of her latte and check her watch.

“Shoot. Is that really the time? I have plans with my mom in the morning. I should get going.” I’ll take bullshit for 200, Alex. She never was a good liar.

“Oh, okay. Are we still on for waffles Sunday afternoon?” I tried to hide my disappointment.

“Yeah. Be at my place around one? I need to talk to Pastor Mike about a few things after service.”

“I’ll be there. Text me when you get home.”

“I will.” She hurried out of the café so fast, someone might think there was a fire.

I threw my head back in my chair and ran my hands down my face. Bryce and Matt were watching me when I looked out at the room again. I mimicked Ellie’s actions and took my half empty cup to the counter. “You couldn’t have waited one minute, could you Walker?” I grumbled as I passed him.

“Sorry dude.” He called after me. “My place-.”

“Half an hour. Yeah. I got that.” I shook my head as I left the café.

End flashback

I turned to watch her take a sip of her latte. She still savoured the taste and licked her bottom lip the same way. “What about the blonde girl you told me about briefly?”

Blonde girl… Lip piercing? No. Was a red head. The sorority girl? That was the brunette with the Adderall. Blonde… oh! Chirpy. “Sara?”

“Yeah.”

“She was nice. Very peppy and chipper though.”

“Ah yes. Need to keep up that stoic exterior. Can’t have someone too chipper, lest people think you have a soul or something.” You always thought I did.

“Exactly.” I laughed. He took a long sip from his cooled coffee. “Can you imagine if I brought her home?”

“Well, knowing your mother, I would probably be attending your engagement party tomorrow instead of the other way around.”

“Oh probably.”

“How is your mom doing, by the way?” “She’s doing okay. After dad died, she was pretty out of it for a few months. She’s gotten better with time though. Really started to come into her own and forge her own path.”

“I’m glad to hear it.”

“Not going to ask how I’m doing Ellie?”

“No. I know how you’re doing.”

“Oh really?”

“Montgomery. I am your best friend. Your dad was never a parent. DNA doesn’t make someone your family. You’re doing the same as you did the day you left and vowed to never speak to him again.”

Her easy explanation surprised me. “Sometimes I forget how well you know me.”

“I know. That’s why I have to remind you all the time.”

“Yeah, yeah. How did Evan react to Scott on the way from the airport?”

“I’m not totally sure. I don’t think he realized how things worked at Liberty and exactly what you and I being friends meant. Scott told him about the treehouse.” Oh God.

“Oh no. Ellie. I need to look the guy in the eye tomorrow.”

“I know you do. Don’t worry. He didn’t seem upset or anything. I think he found it amusing actually.”

“Did he tell him anything else?”

“About you?”

“Yeah.”

“No, mentioned how you guys fucked up and didn’t study for midterms and I singlehandedly kept you all on the team. And how Matt and Garrison managed to keep themselves above their feet until after homecoming senior year.”

“Of course, he did.”

“Don’t worry. Evan will like you.”

“How do you know?” Why do I care? Because you love her you dolt.

“Because I like you. And even though you think you are, you really aren’t a bad guy.” We talked for about another hour or so, just catching up, before we decided to call it a night.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Three o’clock sharp.”

“Good.” She squeezed me tightly. When we pulled apart, I looked down and saw she was wearing my shirt. She kept it all these years.

“Is that my shirt?”

“Yes, it is.”

“I thought I lost that years ago.”

“You never asked for it back. We agreed that I technically borrowed it, remember?”

“Yeah, but I also thought you would have given it back by now.”

“I mean, I can give it back to you tomorrow if you want it.” She offered.

“No, no. You keep it. You seem comfortable in it.” She smiled and hugged me again before leaving.

No matter how much I tried to talk myself into cancelling at the last minute or just not showing up to the party, I couldn’t do it. As much as I wanted to let her finally think that I was an ass, I couldn’t. I couldn’t hurt her like that. So, I manned up and went to Ellie’s engagement party. I showed up right at three, as promised. “Hey you.” She beamed. Her whole face lit up when she saw me.

“Hey Elliebear.” I said as I hugged her. Evan stood to the side, giving us a moment. He looked so uncomfortable with our interaction. Maybe he noticed how much brighter her face got when she saw me. She pulled away first and turned towards her fiancé.

“Evan, this is Monty. Monty, this is Evan.” She motioned between us. I shook his hand awkwardly.

“So, you found the way to Ellie’s heart, huh?”

“Yeah. She is something special. I thank God every day that she decided to give me a chance.”

“Don’t I know it?” I replied, trying to hide the wistfulness and ignore the pang of jealously in my chest.

Jill called her over for something and she pointed Scott out to me. Trying to avoid a pissing match El? “Coming Mom. Scott is over there by the cupcakes. Try to keep him from eating himself to a sugar high?”

I laughed, “can do Ellie. It was nice meeting you Evan. Congratulations.”

“You too Monty. Enjoy the party.” He doesn’t like me.

“Hey Scotty.”

“I didn’t think you’d show up. Justin and I had a bet going. I owe him fifty bucks.”

“Well, you know. It’s Ellie.” I grabbed a cupcake from the stand and took a bite. Not bad. I see why she wants me to monitor Scott.

“That’s why I didn’t think you’d come.”

“You came.” Justin said, patting me on the back in lieu of greeting.

“Yup. Where’s Sasha?”

“Girl talk with Ellie and Jess and some other girls.”

“Riveting. What choice did I have? My options were come, watch her with Evan, and hate every second of it for an hour or two, or, not come and have her hate me for the rest of our lives.”

“I guess. Are you going to go to the wedding?” Justin asked.

“See if Evan lets her invite me first. He doesn’t seem too impressed so far. Thanks for that by the way Scott.”

“I’m sure he’ll warm up to you.”

“If you’re invited? Which you will be, because you’re her best friend.”

“Then what kind of best friend would I be, if I didn’t go to her wedding? I’d just hate myself for a few more hours then. That’s better than a lifetime of her hating me.”

“Fair. Look, if you want to leave, just say the word. We can go back to my place and drink.” Scott offered.

“Thanks. I need to stick it out. It’s Ellie.” The rest of the party was fine. I talked to Jill and Rob for a while. I even talked to Evan for a bit. It was awkward but we didn’t fight each other. If he suspected anything about my feelings for her, he didn’t say anything. I left that evening, wondering if he noticed Ellie looking for me and not him all afternoon and letting my brain go somewhere it hadn’t gone in years. At least, not willingly gone in years.

I held out some sick hope that maybe, just maybe, the engagement wouldn’t last. I knew it was wrong of me, but I couldn’t help it. This was the girl that I had been in love with since the eighth grade. That’s when she stopped being like one of the guys. When she became something more. Even though I knew it wasn’t an attainable thing, even back then, there was always this little spark of hope. She was the reason I didn’t really date in college. She was the reason no girl was worth bringing home to meet my mom. They were all compared to her. They would always be compared to her. I always hoped that she felt the same way about me as I felt about her. That hope vanished when I checked my mail after work that Wednesday. The fancy envelope and familiar script were enough of a giveaway. I didn’t need to open the card to know what it was. The invitation. I sighed as I went in the house and opened the card. I merely skimmed for the important dates and time. I knew in that moment that I had finally lost her. I also knew that I would go anyway as I signed, sealed, and mailed the RSVP that night. I had to go. It’s Ellie.

**

The day had finally arrived. I had been dreading this day for the better part of a year. It was the morning of Ellie’s wedding. I woke up, forced myself to get out of bed, made coffee, and showered. I stared at the black suit hanging on my bedroom door for fifteen minutes. Arguing with myself about if I was really going to do this was getting me nowhere closer to a decision. If I go, I’ll hate myself. If I don’t go, she’ll hate me. If I go, I’m losing her. If I don’t go, I’m losing her. If I go, then I’ll get to see her. If I don’t go, I won’t see her. If I go, I’ll have to hold my feelings in forever. If I don’t go, I’ll have to hold my feelings in forever. Finally, I came to a decision. I wasn’t willing to risk losing her because I couldn’t show up for her. If I wasn’t going to be able to be with her, at least I could still be in her life. Maybe. But I’d cross that bridge when I got to it. I put the suit on and fixed my hair. Then I went to the liquor cabinet and filled a flask with whiskey. I couldn’t drink it in church because if Ellie found out, she would kill me, Ten Commandments be damned.

I arrived at the church forty-five minutes before the ceremony was scheduled to start. I took a sip from the flask in my pocket on the city sidewalk. Spotting Bryce, I walked over to him. “Hey.”

“Hey man, how’s it going?”

“It’s going, you?”

“Same old, same old.” We chatted mindlessly for a few minutes until Justin showed up with Clay and Sasha. I’m shocked we haven’t gotten a happy announcement from them yet. She looks thrilled.

“Justin, Clay. Hey Sasha.” The trio greeted me, and Clay took Sasha inside. He seemed to pick up on the displeasure radiating off of her.

“Holding up okay?” Justin asked.

“Sure.”

“He’s at his best friend’s wedding.”

“I know. Just trying to be nice Bryce.” Zach showed up and broke some of the tension brewing between Bryce and Justin. Never thought I’d be happy to see Zach freaking Dempsey.

“So, I heard from one of the groomsmen that she looks beautiful.”

“Of course, she does. It’s Ellie. And it’s her wedding day.” I said. Scott found us milling in the back of the chapel and came over. He didn’t bother greeting us.

“Have you talked to her?” he asked.

“No. I wanted to give her space. In case I decided not to come.”

“Oh. You could go talk to her now.”

“And say what Scott?”

“Tell her.”

“Tell her what? It’s her wedding.”

“I know that.” I looked around to see if anyone was paying attention to our little group. They weren’t.

“Tell her what exactly Scott? How do you propose I go about telling her that I think she’s making a mistake and that I’ve been in love with her since we were thirteen? I’m not going to do that. Not today. Not ever. I’m not messing this up for her.” I whisper-yelled.

“He has a point Scott.” Zach pointed out.

“If I say something, I’ll lose her forever. So, to avoid losing my best friend, I’m going to sit here, watch her marry the man she loves, and wish her the best. And then I will go home, get very drunk, and sleep the hangover off for the next two days.”

Scott raised his hands in defeat. “Okay. I get your point. I’m not going to push you into doing something you don’t want to do.” Even though I made a good little speech, the closer we got to the ceremony, the more uncomfortable I became. I couldn’t stop the thoughts of wanting to do exactly what Scott suggested. I wanted nothing more than to go find her and tell her how I felt. But then I looked around the room and saw all of these people waiting excitedly to see Ellie and Evan get married and live happily ever after. I wasn’t going to be the reason that didn’t happen. But the closer we got to ceremony time, the closer I also got to losing my resolve to sit here and watch this happen. I couldn’t watch her marry someone else.

“I can’t do this.” I said suddenly.

“What?” Zach asked.

“I can’t watch her marry him. I can’t sit here and watch them get married. I can’t give her up like this.”

“What are you doing Monty?” Scott asked. I stood up from my seat.

“Tell Ellie that I’m sorry.” With nothing more to say, I turned around and walked out of the church. My friends didn’t try to follow me, too stunned to process what was happening. I got in my car and drove. I wasn’t sure where I was driving until I pulled into the lot.

I opened the door to the quaint café and saw that our table was available. Though, I suppose now it was more my table than our table. I lost her today. There was no way I was getting her back after what I did. I slipped my jacket off and hung it over a chair to save the spot, before going to the counter and ordering.

“Can I get a tall bourbon neat. Make it a double.” Monet’s had been licensed a few years ago.

“Sure thing. Rough day?” The barista asked.

“You have no idea.” I shook my head and took the drink she set in front of me. Back at what was now only my table, I pulled out my phone and scrolled though some old photos. A lot of them were of Ellie. She used to like to steal my phone and leave me with some selfies to surprise me when I opened the app. I scrolled through the seemingly endless stream of photos and ordered another bourbon when I finished the first one. My trip down memory lane was interrupted when I got a text from Bryce.

I need you to tell me where you are.

Why?

Because I do. Now tell me where you are.

Why?

Montgomery. You want to tell me where you are.

Fine. If you must know. I’m at Monet’s. Now why do you need to know?

I’m sorry about homecoming night. I hope this can make it up to you at least a little. I stared at the screen in confusion. Shaking my head, I put my phone down and went back to sipping the amber liquor. What the hell is he talking about? Fucking Bryce. I didn’t look up when I heard the bell chime above the door. Nor did I look up when I heard the click of high heels against the wood floors.

“Is this seat taken?” I heard a familiar voice, softly.

I looked up at her then, my eyes widening in surprise. What is she doing here? She is supposed to be getting married to Evan. What does this mean? Why is she here?

“I couldn’t do it if you weren’t there. You’re my best friend Monty.”

I scoffed quietly before replying, “it’s not taken, no. Sit if you want,” and taking another drink from my glass, not looking at her for fear of letting my guard down again, only to be crushed again.

“Hey,” she started, reaching for my hand. I looked at her hand and paused before letting her take it, “I mean it. I couldn’t marry him.”

“Why not?”

She was quiet for a moment. Noticing I had about fingers width of bourbon left in my glass, she grabbed it, downing the rest of it.

“Hey. I was drinking that.” I protested.

“I couldn’t marry Evan because he wasn’t you. And you weren’t there to say anything by the time I walked down the aisle. You were just going to give me away and live the rest of our lives wondering what if.” She told me while she stared into the bottom of the now empty glass.

“You- really?” Wait, how did she know I was there? “How did you know…?”

“Zach told me.” Of course, he did. I sighed internally.

“I know I wasn’t there Ellie. I just. I couldn’t sit there in that church and watch you marry him. And I knew I was and would be too much of a coward to stand up and say something when I saw you standing up there with him. I had to let you be happy.” I told her, trying to make her understand that I couldn’t be the reason she spent her life unhappy.

“Don’t you get it Montgomery? I wouldn’t have been happy. Not really. Or at least not for long. Not with Evan.”

“So why did you agree to marry him?”

“Because I thought it would be easier? My friends liked him, my family liked him, I liked him. I just thought that it would be easier to ignore my feelings. I could marry him, officially move to Atlanta, come home a couple of times a year, have a couple of kids. It all seemed easier than admitting to myself that I was in love with my best friend and if I really, truly wanted to be happy, I would need to be with him instead. And that admitting that would change everything. But I’ve learned over the past year that easy doesn’t always mean happy. And sometimes what we think is easy in the short term, isn’t always easy in the long term.”

Easier. Sure. She finally admitted it. She’s in love with me. I chuckled lowly, “took you long enough.”

She furrowed her brow at me, “what is that supposed to mean? I just confessed my love for you, and that’s all you have to say?”

“Yeah. It took you long enough to come to that conclusion. You were what? Half-way through the ceremony before you put a stop to it?” I asked, unable to keep the bitterness out of my tone.

“Not exactly. I knew a while ago. I spent the whole morning shaking and waiting for you to come and tell me that I was making a mistake. When you didn’t come, I thought… that you either didn’t feel the same way, or that you were going to do the kind thing for once and not say anything, but I thought at least you would be there. When I saw that you weren’t, I knew I couldn’t marry him. Even if it was the easy choice.” When I didn’t say anything she added, “you picked a great time to do the kind thing.”

“Yeah, well. You knew it would happen sometime. You owe me another shot by the way.” I muttered.

“Oh please. There was barely a fingers width in your glass.” she told me, sighing dramatically.

I looked at her through my eyelashes, “they won’t serve you that small an amount.” she rolled her eyes and stood up to go order me another shot. Before I could chicken out again, I surprised her when I grabbed her wrist to stop her, before pulling her down into my lap, she fell rather gracefully given the fit of her dress and kissing her deeply. I pulled away first and turned to look out the window. Our friends had gotten out of the car and were clapping and high fiving each other.

“How about that shot now?” I smirked.

[shishinoya]

these requests are old and im trying to answer them LOL: a-z alphabet CLOSED

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆ — REQUEST || “Hey can I request the whole of the nsfw alphabet for tsukishima please 😊💓” — anon — PAIRING || Tsukishima Kei X Reader — TYPE || Headcanons — WARNING || NSFW — WORD COUNT || NA — AUTHOR’S NOTE || ASUCBAOSNCOA the whole list... like they don't take long but ubcoansca AHAHHAHA nad I'm so sorry this is so late aucbaosnca ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

[ a — aftercare (how would they be after sex?) ]

》 Tsukki may be a walking salt shaker but mans knows how to treat a woman

》 After sexc time, he may look very indifferent, but he’s not

》 What a tsundere.

》 He strokes your hair and moves it out of your face

》 Ngl, he’s kinda a tease too kuroo taught him well

》 Will pull your head into his chest and make 1 or 2 comments about how well you did or even friendly banter will be exchanged

》 He knows how to treat you and if you request something, he’ll stare at you at first, but like of course, he is going to meet your needs

》 Cuddles and just wraps his arms around you, placing his chin on top of your head

》 He’ll talk to you until you fall asleep and then he will allow the exhaustion to take over, will never allow himself to fall asleep first

[ b — body part (what’s their favourite body part of you and what body part of theirs would you like?) ]

》 You love his fingers man

》 Just look at them!!!!

》 Long slender fingers that have you wrapped around them any day babeyyy

》 Whether it be him using his fingers to scratch your head or fucking you till you literally cannot think of anything but them, but you love them :D

》 Honestly, I don’t even think he really cares for a specific body part

》 If anything he would really like the top of his head cuz that's all he can see

》 No, it’s cuz he can place his hand on top of it, nO NO, use it as an armrest

》 That’s his reasoning

[ c — cum (anything to do with cum) ]

》 Loves playing with your cum on his fingers

》 After he makes you come explosively :D, he likes to watch the way it drips down his wrist and the way it forms strings between each finger

》 Kinda a salty kinky bastard and might even make you lick it off too

[ d — dirty secret (learn a dirty secret they have) ]

》 He doesn’t admit to staring at you, but he does

》 And when he does, most of the times, he likes to imagine stripping you with his eyes

》 He’ll never tell anyone of course

》 Kinda embarrassed about that

[ e — erogenous (what’s their sensitive spot that makes him putty in your hands?) ]

》 Did this here!

[ f — favourite position ]

》 Did this here!

[ g — goofy (are they more serious in bed or more likely to laugh?) ]

》 He a serious babeyyyy

》 Tbh he won’t really be into fucking and if he does, he wants it to be more lovemaking than actually just fooling around

》 He’ll only really laugh when he finds it amusing how much you are begging and shaking for him

》 Ah, a little shit

[ h — hair (how well are they groomed? do they like it when you pull their hair?) ]

》 He’ll be pretty clean dude

》 Doesn’t like it when they get too long so he maintains it

》 And no

》 He doesn’t like it when you touch his head, let alone pull no his hair so please don’t

[ i — intimacy (how intimate are they? how long into the relationship does it take for them to want to get intimate?) ]

》 Nah he kinda salty all the time

》 He likes the affection but won’t get really into it sexually

》 He kinda awkward...

》 So it takes him some time before he gets intimate

[ j — jerk off (when would they masturbate?) ]

》 Not often

》 Tsukki is a busy boy with his studies and watching land before time

》 I think he would be listening to music more often than he is thinking about fucking you

》 It’s only on those rare occasions where his horny teen hormones get a hold over him

[ k — kinks (do they have any kinks?) ]

》 Praise kink

》 He likes it when you compliment him and it just gets him off

》 Like, shit if you say how full his dick makes you feel, he feels like the biggest man there is

[ l — location (where do they like to fuck? favourite place? how open are they to the public?) ]

》 Somewhere he can keep you to himself

》 He doesn’t like really showing you to others

》 So it would be somewhere in your place or at his place when it is completely empty

[ m — motivation (what drives them in sex?) ]

》 Praise.

》 That’s it.

》 Praise.

[ n — NOs (what are their turnoffs?) ]

》 A lot of things

》 Like I don’t think he’s into BDSM cuz he either thinks its a hassle or it just hurts too much

》 He vanilla babeyyy

》 So nothing too kinky or else he’ll be overwhelmed

[ o — oral (do they like giving it? do they like receiving it?) ]

》 He likes giving that’s for sure

》 I don’t think he’s really into receiving it but he won’t turn it down if you offer

》 Loves to just use that salty tongue of his and those long ass fingers and make you bend to his will

[ p — pace (how fast are they? how rough are they? how considerate are they of their partner?) ]

》 Slow and sensual!

》 Can be fucking rough though

》 Tsukki gives me sadistic vibes

》 So he’ll most deff fuck you so hard if he really wanted to

[ q — quickies (do they enjoy them? where is their favourite place to have a quickie?) ]

》 With his hands, hell yeah

》 Will always like to tease you if he’s into the mood

》 Most times it ain’t though

》 He shy shy

[ r — risk (are they open to new experiences?) ]

》 Nah vanilla all the wayyyy

》 He won’t really want to try anything new

》 If you try and pull a fast one on him, he’ll know

》 Bad

[ s — stamina (how many rounds can they go? how long can they last?) ]

》 Eh... He kinda can last kinda not

》 Like only for 2 rounds max

》 He’s pretty decent

[ t — toys (do they use them? do they enjoy using them? what is their favourite toy?) ]

》 HE’S VANILLAAAAAAA

》 Plus his fingers are all you need heh

[ u — unfair (how much do they tease you?) ]

》 A lot

》 A LOT

》 Not as much as Kuroo but he’s still a tease

》 Those fingers are a sin

[ v — volume (how loud are they?) ]

》 Nah babeys doesn’t want to be really loud

》 He kinda tsundere too

》 So he’ll try to conceal his moans and grunts so that only you can hear them

》 They are really quiet and strained

[ w — wild card (know something about them? ]

》 Music?

》 Music.

》 Will might want to try fucking with some music in the background

》 Just a thought

[ x — x-ray (how would they look like without their clothes on?) ]

》 Ah he’s quite skinny and very long

》 He’s got a decent length but the girth ain't there

》 He’s got a skinny dick just like his skinny legs

[ y — yearning (how high is their sex drive? how often do they think about sex?) ]

》 Not often

》 He ain't a horndog like Kuroo so

》 He has other things that are more important than thinking about fucking

[ z — zzz (how quick are they to fall asleep afterwards?) ]

》 He’ll make sure that you are comfy before he dozes off

》 Like before, he will never fall asleep before you do

》 He makes it his goal but doesn’t tell anyone bc the boy is shyyy

[daemour]

Title: Find You

Genre: Angst, Fluff, a ‘lil Smut

Pairing: Jinyoung x Jaebeom, minor Jinyoung x Youngjae, for 5 seconds a side of Ten x Yugyeom

Summary: Jinyoung’s kinda a dumbass. Jaebeom’s even more of a dumbass, but he’s also kind of an asshole (in the best way possible.)

Warnings: Jinyoung suxxs a dick; the smut scene is just under 600 words out of 13k

Word count: 13482

CRIS CRIS CRIS @limjaeseven​ I LOVE YOU!! thanks for all the stuff you do for me; i hope this can somehow repay it!! :)))))) love you broskiiiiiii lets hope for many great times~! also heres ur dumb gays :)))) <3333

I struggled with this A  L O T so i hope you guys like it owo~

When Jinyoung walked out of his room and saw Jaebeom in the kitchen, that wasn’t unusual. The older one did tend to use the spare key whenever he didn’t want to cook. What was unusual, however, was the fact that Jaebeom had no shirt on.

As much as Jinyoung would like to ogle Jaebeom’s fine ass, he had more questions than wishes. “Hyung? What are you doing?” Jaebeom spun around, a sheepish smile on his face, and Jinyoung repeated the mantra, don’t look at tiddies, don’t look at tiddies over and over to himself. It’s a hard battle, and Jinyoung lost it almost immediately. Jaebeom was amused.

“My eyes are up here, Nyoungie. Not on my nipples.” Jinyoung would like the floor to swallow him up, please. “Anyways; I left my keys at home when I went to work, but I found your keys in my car. I left them in there by accident,” Jaebeom explained, laughing. “I borrowed your couch if that’s fine.”

Yes, that’s so fine. Always fine. You could even use my bed. With me still in it, of course. “Yeah, go ahead. Next time, just text me. I have your spare set of keys, remember?” Jaebeom’s mouth opened, and Jinyoung could tell he forgot.

“Yeah.” Jaebeom drew out the diphthong and smiled. “Do you want breakfast?”

“God, yes please,” Jinyoung groans. “Thanks, man. You’re a lifesaver. God, you’re literally the perfect boyfriend.”

Jaebeom offers a sheepish smile, leaning across the counter and poking Jinyoung in the cheek affectionately. “Not perfect, but I made rice pudding and toast.” He slid a plate across to Jinyoung, who thanked him gratefully. “I’ll be out of your hair then.” He started to leave when Jinyoung frowned.

“Where’s your shirt?”

Jaebeom shrugged.

“I don’t know; I think some girl at the club stole it when I spilt a drink on myself and went to wipe it off.” The older left without another word, and Jinyoung could feel his heart hurt. He forgot Jaebeom was painfully straight, and that he was painfully gay. He was once again reminded that his crush was indeed one-sided. And yes, his crush did just walk out of his door with no shirt on.

When Jinyoung used to think he was straight, he remembered feeling romantic feelings towards Jaebeom and passing it off as wanting to be best friends forever. And now that he knew for sure he’s into boys, he found out the hard way that best friends just wasn’t what he wanted to be. But that couldn’t be helped. Jaebeom would never want to be with him, and Jinyoung would just have to suffer.

Alas, he couldn’t wallow in self-pity today. His brother, Yugyeom, was flying in with his best friend BamBam, and Jinyoung had to go pick them up. He pulled on some clothes he knew would only just barely match, grabbed his keys, and headed out the door. He’s going to be early, so he would stop in a coffee shop near the airport and pick up some drinks.

The coffee shop, Ars Coffee, was busy, but not too busy that Jinyoung would be late, so he stepped in and waited in line. As he looked around the cute shop decorated in pictures of puppies and kittens, he noticed a corner of the shop that reminded him of the first time he had met Jaebeom. The older had been frantically studying and Jinyoung was hustling to find an open seat, tripping over Jaebeom’s backpack and landing in the older’s lap. The older had delivered the line, “you’re not my type, but nice ass,” and the two ended up talking until the shop closed. They exchanged numbers, and the rest was history.

However, Jinyoung was brought back to the present with an ‘ahem’ coming from behind the counter. It’s his turn to order. “Ah- yes, sorry. I’ll take a vanilla latte, an iced choco, and an iced Americano.” The barista laughed, his smile too wide for his face, and marked down the order.

“I hope all that isn’t for you. That’s a lot of sugar, not to mention caffeine.”

Jinyoung smiled back. “Who knows? I could be a college student frantically studying for last-minute exams.”

The barista, Youngjae judging by the nametag, laughed again. “The second semester just ended; you’d be on break. So I’ll just assume you’re apologising to your three girlfriends since they just found out you’ve been double- no, triple-timing them.”

“Boyfriends,” Jinyoung corrects without thinking, and then his head snapped up, eyes wide. “What I mean is- I don’t- I-”

Youngjae offered a sympathetic smile. “It’s all right. I am too,” he reassured, adding that last bit in a lowered voice. “That will be 9,321 won. Which drink is yours?”

Jinyoung fished the bills out of his back pocket, offering it to Youngjae who returned the change.

“Mine is the vanilla latte,” Jinyoung answered, stepping to the side to let the next person come forward to order, and waited patiently. After a few people from ahead of him received their drinks, he saw Youngjae prepare his three drinks, and he felt a twinge of guilt when he realised Youngjae was the only employee at the store.

When he moved to pick up the drinks, he opened his mouth to offer apologies for ordering such a long list of drinks. However, Youngjae rushed off before he even could, just to tend to another customer. Jinyoung left, and when pulling out his drink, noticed a “call me, 2-747-5143 - Choi Youngjae” messily scrawled right under the drink’s label. Cute. He input the number into his phone and took off for the airport.

He’s running late; the coffee shop took longer than he thought, and Jinyoung rushed into the terminal Yugyeom had texted him. He saw his brother, slouching as always, with BamBam, just as skinny, standing up straight next to him. At least his friend had good posture; Jinyoung had been trying to fix his brother’s bad habit for years. “Yah, Kim Yugyeom, straighten up!”

Yugyeom’s head jerked up, and a smile spread across his face. “Hyung!” The tallest bounded over, BamBam following, and enveloped Jinyoung in a tight hug. “How are you?”

Jinyoung laughed. “You act like you haven’t lived with me for twenty-four years. I’m doing well. How are you, Yugyeom, BamBam?” Yugyeom, as expected, immediately launched into a monologue about how his time in Thailand with BamBam’s family was. The fact that he didn’t really like durian was the only bit that stuck in Jinyoung’s head. But he didn’t mind; as much as he would never admit it to anyone’s face, he did miss his younger sibling. Jaebeom just didn’t fill in the gaps Yugyeom had left.

“Hyung, hyung, hyung, did you hear?” Jinyoung snapped his head toward the younger. The younger was telling him something but as mentioned, Jinyoung wasn’t really listening.

“Sorry, Gyeom, what is it?”

“Jaebeom hyung’s roommate is coming as well, you know? Jackson Wang? From when Jaebeom hyung studied in Hong Kong.” Ah. Jinyoung remembered the loud kid he met when he visited Jaebeom during their summer break three years ago. The memory that stood out the most was Jackson immediately declared himself Jinyoung’s best friend. It would be nice to see him again, Jinyoung guessed, but it’s sad Jaebeom would be spending more time with Jackson and Jinyoung instead of just Jinyoung.

Wait, what the hell was he doing?

Has he really gotten so deep into his crush that he’s trying to break off Jaebeom’s friendships? Jinyoung tonks his head on the steering wheel.

“Hyung?”

“Nothing’s wrong, I just…forgot how to drive.” Jinyoung came up with the lamest excuse, and Yugyeom stared at him for a second.

“Are you drunk?”

Instead of gracing him with an answer, Jinyoung started the car and stepped on it (as much was deemed safe).

Yugyeom cackled in his ear, and the oldest of the three aimed a slap on Yugyeom’s chest.

“There are drinks in the back for you,” Jinyoung said, and Yugyeom went for the latte. Before Jinyoung could stop him, Yugyeom noticed the message. To Jinyoung’s relief, however, the younger didn’t mention it, only raising an eyebrow and glancing at Jinyoung’s side profile.

“Hyung, how’s Jaebeom hyung doing?” BamBam broke the silence.

“Jaebeom hyung? He’s doing fine. Same old same old. Doing whatever he pleases. He went to a club yesterday and ended up half-naked on my couch and left to go who knows where and I’m definitely not suffering from an unrequited crush on him. Can’t he just not be so blatantly straight? I’m literally dying because he can’t handle not being hot every second of the day.” With each word that came out of Jinyoung’s mouth, his pitch rose.

BamBam and Yugyeom were quiet for the rest of the ride, and Jinyoung refrained from jumping out of the car lest they would crash. They finally pulled up to the building, and BamBam left the tense atmosphere as quickly as he could. Yugyeom ready to leave, turned to Jinyoung, opened and closed his mouth as if deciding on what to say. “Hyung…maybe you should go on that date.” With that final sentence, Yugyeom exits as well, leaving Jinyoung in the car to ponder over when his life suddenly turned into such a mess.

After concluding his life became a mess once he was born, Jinyoung headed inside to find Yugyeom and BamBam had already made themselves at home and were currently trying to set up the ancient Wii.

“Have you two unpacked already? That was fast.” Jinyoung commented, unimpressed, and Yugyeom looked up at him.

“Yeah, we unpacked…”

“…the Wii.” BamBam finished Yugyeom’s answer and Jinyoung raised an eyebrow, unimpressed.

“Go unpack and then play Wii. I don’t want to trip over any of your bags.” Yugyeom groaned but got up obediently and BamBam followed like a good friend. Once they disappeared from sight, Jinyoung headed into his own room, with the coffee cup from Ars.

Jinyoung plopped down on his bed and opened the contacts on his phone. He stares at the number on the cup. After a moment of deliberation, he inputs it into his phone, saving the contact as ‘Ars - Choi Youngjae” and stares at the empty profile before finally tapping on “message.” He waited again, then sighed, throwing his phone onto the bed and leaving to get something to eat. Youngjae was still probably working and Jinyoung didn’t want to bother him.

Once Yugyeom and BamBam finished unpacking, they, predictably, connected the Wii and coerced (read: threatened) Jinyoung to join them in a Mario Kart championship.

In the middle of Rainbow Road, the door unlocked, and Jinyoung forfeited Yoshi to answer the door. Jaebeom and Jackson stood behind the door, and Jinyoung paused for a minute before letting them in. “Jackson! It’s good to see you again. How have you been?”

Jackson grinned, slapping Jinyoung on the back.

“Hey, Park Gae!” God, Jinyoung forgot about the cute nickname Jackson gave him back in Hong Kong. Jackson waited expectantly, and Jinyoung sighed.

“Sorry. Wang Gae, it’s good to see you again. How have you been?” Jinyoung complied.

“I’m doing well; I’ve actually recently gotten a job here teaching fencing, so I’ll be seeing you guys more often!” Oh. Jinyoung didn’t think Jackson would be staying for that long.

“Hyungs!” Yugyeom finally got up from the couch, having beaten BamBam by a hair and Jinyoung by a mile. Jaebeom grinned endearingly as always, hooking an arm around Yugyeom’s neck and ruffling his hair. “Jaebeom hyung, don’t mess up my hair!”

“What, are you trying to impress the ladies?” Jaebeom teased, and Jinyoung stiffened slightly.

“Yugyeom, have you been trying to impress any ladies-“

Jinyoung started to narrow his eyes, and Yugyeom squawked, pulling himself out of Jaebeom’s grip.

“What- No!” Glancing at Jinyoung’s unwavering glare, Yugyeom immediately looked away and up.

“Kim Yugyeom.”

“Really! Seriously, hyung, no way! No girls.” Yugyeom whined. “I haven’t!” He emphasized the last word.

“No girls?” Jaebeom took this opportunity to tease him further. “What about guys? Any hot men in Thailand who caught your interest?”

Yugyeom glanced back at BamBam, and Jinyoung caught the sly movement.

“There are?” Jinyoung almost screamed, feeling like he might die. His baby brother? Having a crush? Unheard of. Yugyeom had always put dancing first, rejecting everyone. “Who? I must protect my baby brother from them!”

Jackson laughed. “Protect him from them? More like the other way around-“ Yugyeom smacked Jackson on the back.

“Hyung!” The fake tension was eased, and Jinyoung grinned at his brother, ready as always to tease.

“So? Who is it? Do I know him?”

“Well-“ Yugyeom started, and Jinyoung’s jaw dropped. “Not yet.”

“What do you mean not yet?” Jinyoung frowns.

“He’s coming to Korea next week to study dance like I am. You’ll meet him then! Ten hyung is a year older, and BamBam knows him.” The Thai friend nodded.

“He’s a year older? Yugyeom, you’re into older men?” Jaebeom gasped in mock shock, and Yugyeom cackled, shoving the older lightly.

“Hyung, what the hell? He’s only a year older, not like Jinyoung and his young barista love.” Eyes turned to Jinyoung, who immediately began to smack Yugyeom.

“Kim Yugyeom-“

“What’s this about your young barista love?” Jackson was immediately interested.

“He’s not- I’m- How do you know he’s young?” Jinyoung stammered out.

Yugyeom cackled. “Choi Youngjae from Ars Coffee Shop? He tutors me in piano. He’s two years younger than you.” Jinyoung’s mouth dropped open.

God, this was mortifying. Jaebeom’s laughter brought him out of his funk, however. The older man (only by six months, Jackson liked to stress) slapped Jinyoung on the back. “Good for you, Nyoung! You’re finally going for your mans!”

Jinyoung choked something akin to ‘God, I hate you all’ and Yugyeom cackled at his older brother’s misery. However, he noticed Jinyoung’s pained look, and Jaebeom’s hand on his brother’s back, and quieted. “Jaebeom hyung,” the youngest called, “can you play Mario Kart with me? Jinyoung hyung sucks, and I beat BamBam. I wanna play you since you’re basically a grandpa.”

Jaebeom fell for the bait, hook line and sinker, glowering and grabbing the remote BamBam handed him. “All right, brat. Let’s go.”

Jinyoung almost heaved a breath of release and moved to the kitchen to get some water. BamBam followed him, and Jackson sat to watch Yugyeom and Jaebeom compete.

“Hyung-“ BamBam hissed, and Jinyoung tried to ignore him. But BamBam was nothing but persistent. “Hyung, why do you do this to yourself? It’s only hurting you, and in the long run, hurting Jaebeom hyung. This can only end up in two ways. Either you draw away from hyung when it gets too much, and both you and Jaebeom hyung get hurt; you both lose a good friend. Or you don’t and Jaebeom hyung finds out on his own. He’s going to feel bad, Jinyoung hyung. Guilty; he’s going to hate himself. You need to stop this.”

“You think I don’t know?” Jinyoung almost yelled but restrained himself. “God, BamBam, I love him, yes, but he’s also my best friend. I don’t want to just tell him, ‘Hey, I have a crush on you, I need you to never talk to me’, that will just make him sad as well. My best bet is to go out with Youngjae and try to forget.”

BamBam frowned. “Hyung, if you don’t then Youngjae-ssi will get hurt too.” Jinyoung sighed, dropping his head onto the counter. “You don’t have to leave him forever.”

“I know. But it’s not something I want to do. Call me jealous-”

“Am I interrupting something?” Jinyoung turned his head to face Jackson, standing in the kitchen doorway awkwardly. BamBam looked at Jinyoung, who shrugged.

“Might as well tell him, Bam,” Jinyoung sighed. “It’s pointless to hide it.”

Jackson was still confused and Jinyoung was still moping, so BamBam took it upon himself to save them from their misery. Or at least, just explain. After doing so, Jackson’s mouth is agape. “Damn, are you living in a k-drama or something? That’s insane, man.”

Jinyoung almost rolled his eyes, but he’s too tired to do so. Instead, he just got up, drank a glass of water, and smiled tightly at Jackson. “Yeah. I think I’ll go to bed early. Eat whatever, or order something. Don’t let Yugyeom cook.”

As he trudged back into his room, Jaebeom, having just been defeated by Yugyeom, glanced up and saw his best friend leave. “Yugyeom, play against Jackson, okay? I need to ask Jinyoung something. Sounds good?” Yugyeom nodded, engrossed in the game, and Jackson came to play for Jaebeom.

“Jinyoungie, I’m coming in, all right?” Jaebeom knocked gently on his best friend’s door, and he can hear a muffled groan. Jaebeom opened the door and saw Jinyoung lying face down in the bed. “Jinyoungie, what’s wrong?”

“Nuthin’,” Jinyoung mumbled, turning his head off the pillow and away from the door.

“That doesn’t look like nothing, Jinyoung.” The older sighed, stepping forward and sitting in Jinyoung’s desk chair. “Is something the matter?”

Jinyoung didn’t respond, and just pulled a blanket over his head and rolled over some more, enough to wrap himself up like a mummy. Jaebeom sighed again, shifting the chair closer until he’s almost right next to the bed. Jinyoung didn’t move, so Jaebeom reached out and smoothed Jinyoung’s hair. “Hyung-”

Jaebeom’s heart leaps into his chest. He had never heard Jinyoung sound so pitiful ever since the younger had broken his knee cap in middle school. “Jinyoung? What’s wrong?”

“Hyung, I think maybe you should leave me alone.”

With those words, Jaebeom’s heart dropped. Never had he thought he would ever hear Jinyoung say that. Through thick and thin, the two had always stuck together. It was just two years ago Jaebeom found Jinyoung crying alone in his closet and seeing Jinyoung like this again made Jaebeom hurt. He ignores Jinyoung, moving to sit on the bed instead, and wraps an arm around Jinyoung. “Nyoung, I won’t make you talk to me, all right? But I don’t want to leave you alone, and I’ll sit and stay in here. I don’t want you to hurt alone.”

He lay beside Jinyoung, enveloping the younger in his arms, blanket burrito and all, and listened to Jinyoung’s breathing heightened…and then fell as the younger fell asleep.

As much as it hurt Jaebeom to see his best friend like this, he didn’t know what he did hurt Jinyoung more.

When Jinyoung woke, he knew Jaebeom was still there, feeling the older’s arms caressing his arms subconsciously. God, why is Jaebeom like this? Nice one minute and then the next running out the door to meet some girls.

He carefully slid out from between Jaebeom’s arms and adjusted the sheets to cover Jaebeom. As he tiptoed out of his room, he came face to face with Yugyeom, wringing his hands. “Gyeom?” he whispered, “What is it?”

“Hyung-“ Yugyeom was obviously distressed. Jinyoung reached up to brush his bangs out of hair. “ hyung, are you mad at me?”

“Mad? Why would I be mad, baby?”

“I’m gay.“ Jinyoung almost laughed, if not for the look on Yugyeom’s face.

“Baby, I’d never be mad. Look at me and my gayness. Why on Earth would I be mad?” Yugyeom shrugged, still obviously worried. “The only thing I’m unhappy about is the fact you didn’t tell me. But not at you, Gyeom-ah. I’m just worried I failed something as your brother.”

Yugyeom shook his head. “No, hyung. Of course not. You’re the best big brother I could wish for.”

Jinyoung laughed. “Maybe you should get upset more often. I could get used to hearing that.” Yugyeom finally smiled, shoving his brother lightly.

“Hyung, don’t be a dumbass. Come on, let’s eat.” Jinyoung’s mouth dropped open in fake annoyance.

“Yah, respect your elders. Brat.” Jinyoung patted his pockets, before realizing he accidentally left his phone inside the room. He almost groaned audibly, before turning around and opening the door as quietly as he could.

However, that was unnecessary as Jaebeom had already woken, and was seated on the bed and rubbing his eyes. “Hey, hyung,” Jinyoung greeted him almost casually but got the words out slightly too fast.

“Jinyoung, you know you can always talk to me, right?” God, Jinyoung did not want to get into this talk.

“Hyung, I know. I just don’t want to talk about it right now,” Jinyoung sighed. “Maybe one of these days I will, but not right now. Have you seen my phone?”

Jaebeom, knowing that the conversation was over, nodded. “Yeah, it’s on the bed. You were sleeping on top of it.” Jaebeom grabbed it, but before handing it to Jinyoung, smirked. “I texted Youngjae for you.”

“You what?” Jinyoung narrowed his eyes. “Hyung, come on. I was going to get to it.” Jaebeom frowned.

“Really? I distinctly remember multiple times you almost failed a class because you “going to get back to your superiors,” Jinyoung.”

“Hyung, seriously. Maybe school was something, but this is my own business. Stop poking your nose into it. I’ll text Youngjae if I want to, and if I forget, I forget.” Jinyoung rolled his eyes, and Jaebeom’s temper flared.

“Yah, respect your elders, Park Jinyoung. I just wanted you to get out and talk to people. All you do is stay in here all day or work.”

“I’ll respect you once you respect my personal affairs, Jaebeom. And are you saying I’m not exciting because I like to stay inside? Jaebeom, come on. Don’t be daft.”

“I’m just saying-” Jaebeom raised his hands in mock surrender “-going out is fun. It’s an experience.”

“Im Jaebeom, just because you sleep around like a whore-“ Jinyoung slapped his mouth closed, eyes widening, and Jaebeom got up. He was mad. “Hyung, I didn’t mean it.” Jaebeom ignored him, brushing past Jinyoung’s shoulder and leaving the room immediately. Jinyoung sank down onto the floor and almost curses.

He lay there for who knows how long, or at least until his stomach growled, and BamBam pokes his head in. “Jinyoung hyung, are you all right? Jaebeom left in a huff thirty minutes ago and Jackson followed him. What happened?”

“I called him a whore, BamBam. I’m so stupid.” Jinyoung whined, slapping himself. “God, I’m such a dumbass.”

BamBam sighed. “Hyung, what did Jaebeom do? You don’t usually get this angry.”

“It wasn’t his fault-“ Jinyoung tried to defend, but BamBam shook his head.

“It was your own fault you said that, but he must have provoked you.” Jinyoung just groaned, patting the space next to him and BamBam joined him as the older man explained.

Sometime in the middle, Yugyeom joined in and Jinyoung had to explain all over again, getting almost choked up. “Hyung, I think you both were in the wrong. Jaebeom should have let you do your own thing. He’s not that much older than you, and even if he was, you’re an adult,” Yugyeom said.

“When did you two get so wise?” Jinyoung laughed wetly.

BamBam cackled, loud and clear as day. “We’re only wise when it comes to someone else’s affairs. Ours? Not so much. You should’ve seen Yugyeom flail in front of Ten hyung.”

Jinyoung’s eyebrow rose sky-high. “That’s right. Yugyeom, what is this…Ten like?”

The tips of Yugyeom’s ears turned red. “Ten hyung? He’s great. He’s loud and friendly. He likes cats, and he doesn’t like fruit.”

“He doesn’t like what now?”

“Fruit. I don’t know why, but it’s cute,” Yugyeom grinned to himself and BamBam gagged, causing the youngest to reach across Jinyoung and smack his best friend. “But enough about Ten hyung, what did Jaebeom hyung say to Youngjae hyung?”

Jinyoung shrugged. “I don’t know. I didn’t really look.” Yugyeom leaned over and grabbed the phone.

“Well, let’s check.”

Jinyoung grabbed the phone after a moment of hesitation and unlocked it. (The password was Jaebeom’s birthday but no one needs to know that.) The text, glaringly bright, just said a simple ‘Hey, how r u’ and there’s a moment of silence before Yugyeom burst out laughing.

“Jaebeom hyung thinks he’s slick but he’s just as bad at texting as you,” Yugyeom teases.

“Nah, at least Jaebeom hyung uses slang. Jinyoung hyung sounds like he’s texting a business partner.” Jinyoung smacked both of them, eliciting a few more laughs when Yugyeom gasped.

“Hyung, he’s texting you back-” Jinyoung’s head snaps to the phone where lo, and behold, Youngjae had just responded with a ‘hey, im good, how r u?’

At the prodding of the two youngest, Jinyoung replied, and he and Youngjae ended up starting a conversation. Yugyeom and BamBam exchanged looks before quietly leaving Jinyoung with his new beau.

‘What are u up to?’

               ‘Not much, I’m just lying down. How about you?’

‘LOL ur so formal. And you asked that already. But Im doing the same haha’

               ‘Sounds fun. I’m sure we are very exciting.’

‘How’s life?’

               ‘Boring. How’s yours?’

God, Jinyonug could feel the awkwardness oozing from his texts, and he resisted the urge to smack himself. Before he could, his phone rang, Youngjae was calling him. Jinyoung almost dropped the phone, but answered it quickly, pressing the phone to his ear.

“I think it’d be less awkward if we talked on the phone, yeah?” Youngjae’s bright voice sounded, not dulling even through the phone.

“Yeah, that might be best,” Jinyoung laughed. “How was work? It wasn’t too busy, I hope.”

“No, not at all.” A moment of silence when- “Hey, are you busy today?”

Jinyoung’s heart picked up. “No, not at all. Are you?’

“No.”

More silence, when Youngjae burst out laughing, and by default, so did Jinyoung. Who could resist laughing after Youngjae does, after all? “God, we’re embarrassing,” Jinyoung choked out through giggles.

“No, I think it’s all you. You just enable my awkward ability,” Youngjae teased. “But seriously, do you want to hang out today? I’m done tutoring.”

Tutoring reminded Jinyoung. “Yeah, that sounds good! Speaking of tutoring, I’ve heard you tutor my younger brother, Kim Yugyeom?”

“Wait, seriously? Kim Yugyeom is your brother?” Youngjae sounded flabbergasted and Jinyoung laughed once more.

“Yeah. I took our father’s last name and Yugyeom took our mother’s.”

“That’s neat. Yugyeom is such a cute kid, and he learns well.”

“Yeah, but he’s a brat.” The two of them snicker, and Jinyoung can hear Yugyeom sneeze twice.

“But seriously, do you want to meet up?” Jinyoung nodded, but then realised he’s stupid.

“Ah, yeah. Sure! When and where?”

“Does lunch at Ars Coffee work? I have a worker’s discount...and I own the place so the discount is not needed.” Jinyoung snorted.

“Wow, successful and handsome. I sure hit the jackpot. That sounds good.”

“Oh, haha, very funny. I’ll see you at noon.” Youngjae hung up, and Jinyoung stared at his phone for a few minutes, a stupid grin on his face.

God, he’s excited. He’s probably a little too excited. God, he can’t wait to tell Jaebeom. Jinyoung is brought back down from his emotional high as fast as Yugyeom buying an ice choco. Should he text Jaebeom or let the older cool down? Why did he have to run his mouth? Jaebeom was just trying to help and Jinyoung ruined it.

Unfortunately, today is still not a good day to wallow, Jinyoung has to get ready for his date. Date? Is it a date? Dear LORD Jinyoung’s going on a date. Jaebeom be damned (and thanked), he was a bit overeager and ran straight into the doorframe. “Hyung?” Yugyeom poked his head around the hallway corner. “Everything all right?”

Jinyoung beams. “I have a date.” Yugyeom snickers at Jinyoung’s face.

“God, hyung, you look stupid. But congratulations.” Jinyoung suddenly wiped the smile off his face, straightening up and sending the fear of God into Yugyeom’s heart.

“Kim Yugyeom, I may be going on a date with undeniably the cutest man to exist. But I am still your older brother and will not hesitate to kill you.”

Yugyeom cackled and ran into his room with BamBam, locking the door, and Jinyoung rolled his eyes. When his beloved “Ten hyung” comes around, he’ll have to answer to Jinyoung if he ever hurts Yugyeom.

But look at the time; Jinyoung needed to eat and change if he wanted to be at Ars Coffee at noon. Cereal is the fastest option, but BamBam finished the last of that (damn his sweet tooth), so Jinyoung just got a piece of bread and toasted it. He’s excited about his first date, he’s allowed to rush. By the time he had to leave, he had already tried on five different outfits, deciding on a simple black turtleneck and jeans. “I’m heading out, you two. Don’t cause trouble.”

“Get that dick, hyung!” Jinyoung heard Yugyeom and BamBam chorus from in their room, making a mental note to kill them later. But for now, he had a date he needed to go on.

Due to his excitement, he ended up arriving thirty minutes early, and Jinyoung just ordered and waited. Youngjae came barrelling in twenty minutes later, all smiley and Jinyoung could feel his heart melt. “Jinyoung! Hi!” Youngjae slid in across from him. “I heard you arrived really early; the co-owner and my friend told me.”

Jinyoung laughed, trying to cover up his embarrassment. “Damn, if I ever need to commit some shady business, remind me not to do it here. Your co-workers will just snitch on me.” Youngjae guffawed, the sound echoing in the shop.

“Don’t worry, I’ll vouch for you.” Jinyoung laughs as well.

“Thanks, I’m glad I now have a confidant for all my misadventures,” Jinyoung says, poking Youngjae’s arm.

“How many misadventures have you been getting into?” Youngjae raises a brow. “Last time we met, you were three-timing your boyfriends.” Jinyoung snorts.

“Oh, you have no idea. I rob banks and kill my best friends all the time.” Youngjae laughs once more, and Jinyoung could hear it all day, every day.

"You sound like someone my mother would warn me against," Youngjae teases. "I should stay away from you if I want to keep my reputation up."

Jinyoung chuckles. "Well, what's the fun in that?" He leans across the table slightly. "I say damn your reputation, let's go murder someone."

"I don't think that would fly over very well with my friend Mark, but alright. Tomorrow at seven? Who should we start with?"

Jinyoung snorts, all the possibilities going through his head. "Jaebeom," he says without thinking, and almost takes it back. But Youngjae doesn't know the argument; so he'll live with it.

"Who's that?" Youngjae cocks his head and Jinyoung resists the urge to coo.

“He’s my best friend.” Thankfully Jinyoung’s voice didn’t waver. “Everyone has the moment where you want to kill your best friend, surely.”

“No, I am an angel, couldn’t you tell?” Youngjae teased, and Jinyoung refrained from saying ‘yes.’ He liked Youngjae already; they have a lot in common and Jinyoung forgot all about the ordeal with Jaebeom as he spends time with the younger.

However, his glee was soon cut short when he arrived home and he saw Jaebeom’s shoes kicked off to the side. “Yugyeom-ah, is Jaebeom hyung here?” he asked the younger on the couch. Yugyeom looked up, shock registered on his face.

“Hyung, you weren’t supposed to be home ’til later,” Yugyeom stammered, and Jinyoung furrowed his eyebrows, a frown tugging at the corner of his lips.

“Kim Yugyeom, what is going on?” Jinyoung dropped his book bag onto the floor. “I don’t like it when you lie to me, you know this-“

“Jinyoung, it’s not Yugyeom’s fault.” Jinyoung’s head whipped around, Jaebeom having spoken from around the corner of the kitchen.

“Hyung, what are you doing here?” Jinyoung left Yugyeom on the couch and entered the kitchen, seeing Jaebeom cooking…something. “Well, never mind that, hyung. I guess since you’re here, I should apologise for earlier this morning. What I said was out of line and-“

Jaebeom waved him off. “No, just forget it, Jinyoung. We were both at fault. Let’s just put it behind us, hm? We can’t not be best friends over such a petty fight, right?”

“Yeah, best friends,” Jinyoung chuckled almost lifelessly. Time to shove yet another problem under the carpet. “What are you doing here anyway?”

“What, can’t I visit my best friend?” After a moment of silence, Jaebeom sighed, giving in. “I need to learn how to cook Italian dishes. I invited this girl over for dinner next week, and I want to impress her.”

“Can’t you order Italian takeout?” Jaebeom snorted.

“Takeout can’t cut it.”

“Have you forgotten the Great Noodle Incident, hyung? I don’t think I want you cooking weird recipes in my kitchen.” Jaebeom looked up from the pot to glare at Jinyoung.

“Wasn’t that your idea, Nyoung?”

“Well, I think it’s time for me to go. I’m a little tired, you know?” Jinyoung tried to make his escape, but Jaebeom is nothing if not petty.

“No, no, Jinyoung, please refresh my memory. How did the Great Noodle Incident start?” Jinyoung opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again, before he was saved by the doorbell.

When he enters the living room to answer it, it appears Yugyeom had already opened the door to whoever it is standing outside. “Youngjae ah? What are you doing here?” Jinyoung blinked once, twice, thrice.

“Ah, you just forgot your phone at Ars.” Youngjae held up the device. “I texted Yugyeom for your address; I didn’t know he lives here too.”

“Oh, thanks.” Jinyoung smiled, walking over and taking his phone. “I appreciate it, Youngjae. Would you like to come in for a little? Jaebeom is here and you could meet him.”

Youngjae steps forward a bit. “I mean, I don’t want to intrude, but I would love to meet our murder victim once.” Jinyougn laughed out loud, covering his mouth again.

“That’s right. He’s in the kitchen, cooking who knows what. Maybe you could help him out; you work in the coffee shop so you’re bound to be a better cook.” Youngjae laughed.

“I only know how to make pastries, really, but I could try. What is he attempting?” Jinyoung shrugged.

“Some weird Italian recipe, and I don’t want the apartment burnt down.” Jinyoung led Youngjae to the kitchen, gesturing towards Jaebeom. “Youngjae, Jaebeom. Jaebeom, Youngjae.”

Jaebeom turned around, beaming and bowing. “It’s nice to meet you, Youngjae. I’m glad Jinyoung finally got out of his shell and met someone. Lord knows how long I’ve been trying to get him to go on a date.”

Yeah, cus I want to date you. “Well, how does it feel to have Jinyoung ssi finally go on a date then?” Youngjae saved Jinyoung from his thoughts, and Jinyoung poked Youngjae in the side for the comment.

Jaebeom snorted, slapping Jinyoung on the back. “God, I’m so relieved. I definitely would have thought this kid would become an old miserly man who yells at kids.”

“You are only seven months older than me, hyung. Don’t call me kid,” Jinyoung snapped playfully.

Jaebeom gasped. “Now, where has this attitude come from? Don’t talk back to your elders…kid.” It’s Jinyoung’s turn to chuckle.

“God, you’re so annoying.” Jinyoung turned to Youngjae. “See why I chose him as my first murder victim?”

“I don’t know…I think I like him,” Youngjae teased, and Jinyoung pouted.

“I’m so hurt. I’ve been betrayed,” he cried out, “Yugyeom, you’re the only one I love.”

“Ew, hyung, go away,” called Yugyeom from the other room, and the apartment was filled with laughter. God, Jinyoung was beyond happy Youngjae and Jaebeom are getting along. The two seemed to enjoy each other’s company, Youngjae coming around the counter to read the recipe Jaebeom had left out.

Jinyoung left the kitchen for a little, coming to sit by Yugyeom, who was watching a drama on his phone. “Yugyeom, why weren’t you going to tell me Jaebeom was here?”

Yugyeom didn’t look up from his drama, answering with a, “I thought he would be gone by the time you came back. I didn’t want you two to argue again. You know, hyung is my friend too, but I don’t want to see you hurt.”

Jinyoung sighs. “I know. I’ll try not to argue with him too much.”

“I’m not talking about that, hyung,” Yugyeom said, finally pausing his drama to look at his older brother, only this time Jinyoung avoided Yugyeom’s eyes. “Hyung, come on.”

“Yugyeom, where’s BamBam?” Jinyoung tried to change the subject, but Yugyeom was having none of that.

“He’s getting picked up from work by Jackson. Don’t dodge the situation.” Jinyoung still avoided Yugyeom’s eyes.

“I know. But we have guests, and I don’t want to deal with this just yet.”

“Deal with what?” Youngjae had just come around the corner, having finished with Jaebeom.

“My friend is coming over next week, and Jinyoung hyung doesn��t want to meet him since he thinks I’m going to elope or something,” Yugyeom lied smoothly. Jinyoung resisted the urge to kick him for that comment in thankfulness.

“Ooh, your boyfriend?” Yugyeom choked at Youngjae’s comment.

“No! Ten hyung is just a friend.”

“For now-” Jinyougn snorted, and Yugyeom whined.

“Hyung, seriously. You’re so annoying.” Jinyoung laughed at that, ruffling the younger’s hair.

“I’m just kidding, Yugyeom,” he laughed, and turned to Youngjae. “Are you leaving already?” Youngjae nodded sheepishly.

“Yeah, I have to get back to Ars; Mark co-owns the place with me and his shift is almost over.” Youngjae paused briefly, eyes flicking down to Jinyoung’s lips. Jinyoung catches the sly movement and smiles.

“Here, I’ll walk you down to your car.” Youngjae agreed readily, and the two exited the apartment to the sound of Yugyeom gagging really loudly. Jinyoung swore he’s going to kill Yugyeom one of these days. But not right now.

Right now, Jinyoung was focusing on how he and Youngjae are alone in the elevator, and how the younger keeps glancing at his lips. “Hyung-” Youngjae started to speak, and Jinyoung snapped his head to look at him. “Er- I like Jaebeom and Yugyeom. They’re very nice.”

Jinyoung beamed. “I’m glad I know them. As much as they annoy me, they are good friends.”

The silence became deafening again, and lasted until Youngjae and Jinyoung were standing in front of the younger’s car. “Hyung, thanks for letting me hang out for a little,” Youngjae said, and before Jinyoung could react, leant forward and pressed a kiss to the older’s lips before getting in his car and waving.

Jinyoung barely had the mind to wave back before Youngjae started the car and left. He remained in his daze all the way back up to his apartment, where Yugyeom finally had the sense to leave Jinyoung alone and let his brother go into his room without a hitch. Jaebeom, however, isn’t as kind, leaving Yugyeom with instructions on when to take whatever food he’s made out of the oven.

“So, Jinyoungie-ya! How did your date go?” Jaebeom rested against the bedroom door frame, grinning wide like the Cheshire Cat. God, Jinyoung would kiss the smirk off Jaebeom’s face if he could. Unfortunately, for one, he’s on his bed and wrapped up in blankets. And second, Jaebeom might punch him.

Jinyoung frowned with no spite. “It was good, hyung. I really like Youngjae. I’m glad I met him.” Jaebeom nodded once, twice.

“That’s…good. I’m glad, Jinyoungie. You deserve someone in your life.” Jaebeom smiled, but Jinyoung can feel something off about it. He pushes the feeling to the side; Jaebeom was probably still a little upset about the argument earlier.

“Hyung, come here,” Jinyougn smiled lightly, lifting up the blankets, and Jaebeom laughed, walking forward and cuddling up with Jinyoung.

“I forgot you’re so clingy sometimes,” Jaebeom teased, and Jinyoung snoted, kicking Jaebeom lightly in the shin.

“Don’t be mean, hyung,” Jinyonug whined and Jaebeom laughed again, wrapping his arm around Jinyoung’s waist. The younger could feel his heartstrings tugging, but he ignored the feeling, as he’s done all those years. “Hyung?”

“Yes, Nyongie?” Jaebeom was sleepy, and Jinyonug couldn’t blame him. He spent all this time cooking, and paired with the argument this morning, Jinyoung could understand why he’s tired.

“I love you,” Jinyoung whispered, and Jaebeom just groaned, pressing his cheek into Jinyoung.

“Love you too, Nyoung,” he mumbled out a reply before cuddling even closer, and Jinyoung almost cried. Thankfully, he didn’t (how embarrassing would that be) and instead fell asleep against his friend for the second time that day.

They’re woken up an hour later by Jackson, who had returned with BamBam and three cartons of ice-cream and the promise of a movie night. Well, Jinyoung wasn’t going to protest, especially since he didn’t have to pay for either dinner or the ice-cream.

Unfortunately, Jackson chose the movie, and as expected, it was an Iron Man movie. Jinyoung doesn’t know which one; he’s given up on paying attention. Instead, he’s crowded in between Jackson and Jaebeom, the former’s hand slightly uncomfortably high up on Jinyoung’s thigh. Jaebeom looked at the hand on Jinyoung’s thigh unhappily, wrapping his arm around Jinyoung again.

God, it was almost domestic, and Jinyoung could feel the warmth of his crush rise again. Why did he do this? He liked Youngjae; why did Jaebeom have to do this to him?

Jinyoung was suffocating, he couldn't handle this contact. He stood up abruptly, Jaebeom looking up with his eyebrows furrowed and Jackson frowning slightly. Yugyeom stayed silent, as did BamBam.

“Jinyoung-ah, are you all right?” Jackson speaks first. Jinyoung looked at him, eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights.

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “I don’t know.”

At that, Yugyeom stood up, guiding him away from the group. “Hyung, go get a glass of water and go lie down in your room, all right?” Jinyoung nodded blankly, leaving, and as Jaebeom made to stand up, Yugyeom stopped him. “Jaebeom hyung, I don’t think you should go with him. Just enjoy the movie with Jackson hyung, all right?”

Jaebeom glared, but Yugyeom stood firm, and Jaebeom didn’t want to go against the wishes of Jinyoung’s younger brother and so he relented.

Yugyeom found Jinyoung in his room, as he was told, sitting against the bed on the floor and clutching the water in both hands. Yugyeom sighed at his brother’s obviously distressed state. “Hyung, drink the water. Holding it isn’t going to help,” he tried to joke, but it fell flat.

Jinyoung lifted the cup to his lips, taking small sips and Yugyeom sat next to him. “Yugyeom, why did this have to happen to me?” Jinyoung asked solemnly, and the brothers sighed in unison.

“Hyung, I think maybe you should take time off from seeing Jaebeom hyung. It’s doing nothing but hurting you.” Jinyoung finished his cup of water, and Yugyeom took it, putting it on the desk.

“Yugyeomie, I can’t.” Jinyoung’s plea almost broke Yugyeom’s heart. “He’s first and foremost my best friend.” Yugyeom tentatively wrapped his arms around Jinyoung, pulling his older brother into a tight hug, and Jinyoung choked out a sob.

“Hyung, I’ll handle it with Jaebeom, all right? I’m sure he just wants you to be happy.” Jinyoung didn’t respond, crying silently into Yugyeom’s chest.

Sooner or later, Jinyougn was too exhausted, and fell asleep in Yugyeom’s arms, the third time today. Yugyeom didn’t move, too worried to wake up the older, and Jaebeom quietly opened the door and poked his head in.

“Is he doing all right?” Jaebeom walked in further, leaning down and brushing a piece of hair out of Jinyoung’s mouth.

Yugyeom sighed, looking up at Jaebeom. “Hyung, I don’t think he can see you and Jackson any more.” Jaebeom’s eyes widened.

“What do you mean?”

“Hyung, it’s not like that,” Yugyeom added hastily. “I just think that he’s been overstressed with work and making sure you and Jackson don’t notice. I’m forcing him to take a few days off. BamBam has to stay since he doesn’t have a place to stay, but I want Jinyoung to indulge in what he wants. Haven’t you noticed he started rejecting you subconsciously?”

Jaebeom’s frown deepened, but he made no comment. Of course he’s noticed the way Jinyoung flinches when Jaebeom initiates physical contact, the way he avoids Jaebeom’s eyes. “I just don’t want Jinyoung by himself.”

“He won’t be alone, hyung. I promise. I’ll keep an eye on him, and so will BamBam.” Yugyeom reassured, and Jaebeom backed off. Yugyeom knows what he’s doing, Jaebeom reminds himself.

“All right. Jackson and I will be going then. Make sure Jinyoung feels better soon, all right? Can’t have my best friend die on me.” Yugyeom nodded and Jaebeom finally left.

Yugyeom stayed in Jinyoung’s room for the rest of the night, lifting Jinyoung into his bed and curling up next to him. At some point, BamBam had joined the cuddle party, and when Jinyoung awakened, he didn’t want to leave. He didn’t for a long while, but the cuddle party overheated him, so he wriggled his way out of Yugyeom’s arms carefully.

As he made his way into the kitchen, his phone buzzed, and looking at it, Jinyoung noticed Youngjae had texted him, asking him if he wanted to come over today. ‘Mark is at a friend’s for the whole day so we could hang out and watch movies or something’ the text read, and Jinyoung’s heart leapt into his throat.

He responded quickly, agreeing readily, and asked for a time. Youngjae responded just as fast, offering five in the evening, and Jinyoung accepted. He poked his head into his room to see Yugyeom and BamBam still asleep, curled around each other.

He didn’t want to wake them up; it must have been the jet lag getting to them, so Jinyoung let them sleep in. They looked so peaceful anyway; Jinyoung would’ve felt bad if he woke them. But when he tried to exit the room, the buzz of his phone alerting him to a new text alerted BamBam as well. “Hyung?” the Thai man groggily opened his eyes. “Good morning.”

Jinyoung threw him a smile. “Morning, Bam,” he responded, keeping his voice low. “Did you have a good night?”

BamBam sat up, Yugyeom’s head on his chest falling to his lap. “Yeah. Hyung, are you doing all right?” Jinyoung shrugged.

“As good as I can do now. Don’t wake up Yugyeom, all right?” BamBam nodded, looking down at the youngest in his lap. “I’ll be going out later on this evening to see Youngjae.”

BamBam wriggled his eyebrows, and Jinyoung restrained himself from hitting his brother’s friend. “Get that ass, Jinyoung.”

“If anything, Youngjae will get this ass,” Jinyoung stated smoothly, and before BamBam could recover from his shock, exited the room smoothly.

As he glanced down at his phone, three missed calls from an unknown number were there, and Jinyougn frowned, swiping the notifications away. It was probably a telemarketer; Jinyoung had been getting a lot of those calls recently. No big deal, Jinyoung just blocked the number without a hitch.

Breakfast is more important than weird phone calls, anyway. He can’t cook to save his life, but Jinyoung does know Jaebeom kept leftovers from yesterday in the fridge. He’s still unsure whether he likes the ziti, or whatever Jaebeom made, but it’s food.

He popped a plate of ziti into the microwave, keeping an eye on the timer to stop it before it beeped and woke up Yugyeom. But he didn’t need to; Yugyeom had awoken and was coming around the corner. “Hyung, why didn’t you wake me up?”

Jinyoung shrugged. “You looked so peaceful. I didn’t want to wake you up.” This was apparently the wrong thing to say, Yugyeom smirked.

“Aw, is my big bro being soft for his favorite brother?” Jinyoung swiped at Yugyeom, who dodged easily.

“Brat.”

Yugyeom cackled at his older brother’s misery, a regular occurence in this household. Jinyoung did his best to ignore him, instead sending a few cat pictures to Jaebeom. Surprisingly, the older didn’t respond right away, but Jinyoung shrugged it off, pinning it down to Jaebeom probably forgetting to charge his phone again.

BamBam needed yet another ride to work, so Jinyoung offered to take him to get his mind off the upcoming date. Yugyeom wanted to tag along, and Jinyoung knew if that happened, they’d be making two different stops to get food. But Yugyeom shot him with the puppy eyes, and Jinyoung could feel himself give in. Damn him and his soft heart. Thank god Jackson would pick them up instead of him.

And, as expected, Jinyoung waited outside a convenience store as Yugyeom and BamBam bought ramen. As he waited, someone came up to him. The man looked vaguely attractive; his features fit each other perfectly and gave him a gorgeous aura. “Excuse me?” Jinyoung pinched himself discreetly to get him out of his funk.

“How may I help you?” The stranger offered a slight smile, and Jinyoung had to focus really hard on his eyes instead of his lips.

“I’m a little lost; I just arrived and I was wondering if you knew where Seoul National University is.” Jinyoung ‘ah’ed in understanding.

“Yeah, it’s a little far from here. Which airport did you come from?” The person ran a hand through his hair sheepishly.

“Gimpo Airport.”

Jinyoung snorted. “Apologies,” he said quickly, covering his mouth with his hand, “you went in the opposite direction.”

The stranger’s mouth opened, but he had nothing to say except a crass phrase, and Jinyoung snorted again. “Sorry- God, I’m an idiot.”

“No, it’s not a big deal. You can take the bus to University; there’s a bus that stops a few miles away. Or, you could take a taxi.” Jinyoung offered, and the man nodded.

“Yeah, thank you. Where’s the bus stop?” Jinyoung pointed out the way and the bus he had to take. “Thank you again, I appreciate it.” The man flashed a smile and Jinyoung could feel his knees shaking, but stood firm.

“No problem. Good luck.” As soon as the man turned the corner, Yugyeom ran up with the instant noodles in his hands.

“Hyung! We got the noodles.”

“Yah, what took you so long, brat?” Jinyoung pinched Yugyeom’s ear. “It’s cold.”

Yugyeom whined, and BamBam laughed at his friend’s misfortune before Jinyoung grabbed his ear too. “Hyung-“ the two youngest groaned, and Jinyoung huffed.

“Eat your noodles, or else you’ll be late, BamBam.” Jinyoung rolled his eyes, and BamBam cackled.

Yugyeom had kindly gotten him a packet of juice from the store, and as BamBam and Yugyeom made fun of each other, Jinyoung sipped on the juice like a mom watching their kids play in the pool. They arrived at BamBam’s work, a dance studio, and as BamBam stepped out, so did Yugyeom. Jinyoung threw him a questioning look, and Yugyeom smiled.

“I’m going to apply to work here,” Yugyeom explained, and Jinyoung nodded in understanding. “Don’t be too loud, Hyung. Youngjae’s neighbors might call the police.”

Jinyoung’s face hardened, and Yugyeom and BamBam ran into the building cackling like the little devils they are. “Yah, Kim Yugyeom,” he muttered under his breath, well aware the taller man couldn't hear him.

But now was not the time to sulk around at his younger brother’s (loving) disrespect, he needed to get home and change for his date. On the way home, he passed by the bus stop he directed the stranger from earlier to, and saw the man sitting on the bench. Jinyoung laughed quietly, the situation was kind of funny once you thought about it.

Jinyoung remembered when he and Yugyeom had first moved to Seoul from Jinhae-gu. The younger had gotten lost so many times, and Jinyoung had gotten lost even more times trying to find Yugyeom. He hoped the stranger would be able to find his way around. Though, with that pretty face, Jinyoung didn’t think he would have any trouble getting help.

The stranger reminded Jinyoung a little of Jaebeom. When the older had first gone to Jinhae-gu to meet Jinyoung’s family, Jaebeom was lost at almost all times of the day. It was adorable, and honestly, Jinyonug felt a sense of satisfaction from feeling helpful to Jaebeom. Hopefully, I can be the same for Youngjae, Jinyoung thought as he pulled into the parking area of his apartment building.

He had about ten minutes to change before he had to leave again, and Jinyoung was too lazy to dress a little nicer, so he just threw on some jeans and an orange sweater that BamBam had tried (keyword: tried) to convince Jinyoug to get rid of. It was a comfy sweater, though, and Jinyoung liked it. Fuck BamBam.

Jinyoung remained proud of his sweater all the way up to when he texted Youngjae, letting him know he’s there. But as soon as Youngjae opened the door and looked at his shirt, Jinyoung could feel his ears turn red. “Hey,” Youngjae laughed. “I like your sweater.”

Jinyoung scrunched his nose, ears turning slightly red. “Thanks. I like it too.”

“No, seriously,” Youngjae patted Jinyoung on the back. “It’s not something that would look good on anyone, but you pull it off.”

“The more you talk about it the more self-conscious I get, you know?” Youngjae didn't respond, just laughed, and led Jinyoung up three flights of stairs. Youngjae’s apartment was comfortable, small enough for two people, with a lot of plants everywhere. The couch was a beige, matching the white rug, which Jinyoung wondered how it was so clean.

If he had a rug like that, Yugyeom would have spilt chocolate on it six times, BamBam would have dropped lipstick just as much, and Jaebeom’s cats would have ripped it to shreds whenever the older brought them over. “Do you like it?” Jinyoung looked up at Youngjae, and nodded.

“It’s very neat. Where did you get your barstools?” Youngjae snorted.

“Yardsale. Mark just repainted them.” Jinyoung chuckled, but Youngjae motioned him toward the couch and made him sit down. “Let me get some water and then we can look for something to watch, sound good?”

Jinyoung nodded again, it seemed like the only thing he could do right now. Youngjae walked behind the counter, and Jinyoung dug his feet into the rug, appreciating the softness of it. “How is this rug so clean?” he wondered aloud, and Youngjae sighed.

“It wasn’t. But I banned Mark from being on the rug with snacks after I got it professionally cleaned.” Jinyoung laughed.

“Is he that messy?”

“Not on purpose, no, but he likes to eat chips a lot, and the crumbs get all over the rug. I wouldn’t have minded if he ate gummies,” Youngjae gripes, returning with two glasses of water. “I brought you a glass too just in case.”

Jinyoung thanked Youngjae, bringing the glass to his lips and taking a sip, not noticing how Youngjae’s eyes moved to his eyes. “What movie do you want to watch?” Jinyoung asked, and Youngjae smirked, eyes moving back up to Jinyoung’s eyes.

“Aren’t I supposed to ask that?” Jinyoung hummed.

“Well, I like most movies. Romance, comedy, and horror are some of my favorite genres. Do with that as you will.” Jinyoung winked at Youngjae, and Youngjae laughed breathily.

“I like romance and comedy as well, but I don't sit well with horror.” Youngjae turned on the TV, scrolling through Netflix’s menus, before the two of them finally settled on some obscure comedy neither had ever heard of.

To be frank, Jinyoung was the only one paying attention to the movie. Youngjae couldn’t keep his eyes off Jinyoung’s profile, especially when the older one laughed loudly. Sooner or later, Youngjae found himself leaning in and Jinyoung turned his head and smiled flusteredly. “Hyung,” Youngjae starts breathily, “may I kiss you?”

Jinyoung whined out a yes, and Youngjae pressed his lips against Jinyoung’s tentatively, both men closing their eyes. Youngjae’s lips were chapped while Jinyoung’s were soft, and the difference was felt almost immediately. Youngjae attempted to lick his lips while still kissing Jinyoung, and as expected, Jinyoung parted his lips slightly. Youngjae jolted slightly, surprised, but got back into the groove of things.

He pressed further, Jinyoung’s back pushed into the arm of the couch. It wasn’t quite that comfortable, but Jinyoung ignored the feeling, instead opening his mouth a little wider. Youngjae took this opportunity and ran his tongue along the seam of Jinyoung’s teeth.

The whimper that came out of Jinyoung’s mouth surprised both of them, and Jinyoung quickly tried to explain himself. He started with a, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to-”, but was quickly cut off by Youngjae leaning forward and kissing him again.

The two kissed for what seemed like hours, but it was only about five minutes before Jinyoung broke away and whined out, “Can I suck you off, please?” The plea goes straight to Youngjae’s dick who nodded quickly and shifted backwards on his butt to let Jinyoung lean forward.

Jinyoung reached for Youngjae’s sweatpants, pulling it down as quickly as he could. However, before he removed Youngjae’s boxers, Jinyoung slid off the couch onto his knees and adjusted Youngjae to sit with his legs on either side of Jinyoung’s body. He then leans in.

“Fuck.” The obscenity spouted out of Youngjae’s mouth as soon as Jinyoung pressed his lips against Youngjae’s covered crotch. “Fuck, hyung.”

Jinyoung laughed breathily, the feeling making Youngjae moan, and Jinyoung pulled down his boxers at last, freeing Youngjae’s cock. “Youngjae-yah,” is all Jinyoung whined before leaning forward and licking a stripe up the younger one’s cock.

Before Youngjae could react, Jinyoung sucked the dick into his mouth and dipped his tongue into the slit. “Hyung-” Jinyoung looked up through his eyelashes at Youngjae and Youngjae almost creamed his pants. “Hyung, if you keep going I might cum right now,” Youngjae breathed.

Jinyoung popped off Youngjae’s cock with an obscene sound, and smirked, his full lips bitten to shame. “Good.” Youngjae swore he saw heaven and hell at the same time when Jinyoung sucks his cock down until his lips wrap around the base.

Youngjae’s hips twitched, and Jinyoung moaned, moaned, and swallowed around Youngjae’s dick. “Fuck, Jae-yah. Fuck my mouth,” Jinyoung rasped, popping off Youngjae’s cock and licking up the beading pre-cum. As soon as Jinyoung slid Youngjae’s cock back into his mouth, Youngjae gave him a questioning look, and Jinyoung nodded to reassure the younger.

Youngjae gave a few testing thrusts, and when all Jinyoung did was relax and open his jaw even wider, his thrusts built up until Jinyoung was drooling all down his chin and crying. It was when Jinyoung brushed his tongue alongside the bottom of Youngjae’s cock when the imaginary band around Youngjae’s cock snapped.

Youngjae cummed. His ears burned; he hadn’t meant to cum like a teenage boy watching porn for the first time, but a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.

“God, Jinyoung,” Youngjae wheezed. “How on Earth are you so good at this?” Jinyoung chuckles, the sound throaty and rough.

“Practice from college...and my three girlfriends,” he joked as an afterthought.

“Do you need any help?” Youngjae offered, but Jinyoung glanced at the TV and then the clock. The movie was over, and Jinyoung would have to pick something up for dinner.

“No, maybe next time,” Jinyoug sighed, throwing Youngjae a wink and a smile. “I have to feed the kiddos.”

Youngjae laughed, bright and loud as always. “Can’t let them starve. Drive safe back.” He leaned forward, planting a much more sweet and much less sensual kiss on Jinyoung’s lips. Something that Jaebeom would do. Jinyoung’s ears burned; he just sucked off Youngjae, why is he thinking about Jaebeom. “Jinyoung?”

Youngjae’s voice brought Jinyoung back to his senses, and he smiled.

“Will do.”

On the way home, Jinyoung couldn’t stop thinking about why Jaebeom suddenly popped into his head. Fuck it.

Jinyoung steered to the side of the road, parking in front of a convenience store, and called Youngjae. “Jinyoung?”

“Hey, Youngjae,” Jinyoung said, voice thick. “Um, I don’t think this will work out. I’m really sorry, I did like you in that way. But I also have feelings for someone else and I don’t want to lead you on. It’s nothing against you, I just-”

Youngjae cut him off. “No, it’s okay, Jinyoung. It’s Jaebeom, isn’t it?” Jinyoung paused.

“How’d you know?”

“I saw how you looked at him, and how he looked at you.” Jinyoung snorted.

“Oh, he’s not gay. But I just don’t think I could date you if I had major feelings for him as well,” Jinyoung laughed shortly.

He could hear Youngjae sigh in the background. “Well, whatever you say. But hey, if you ever want to, my door is open. After all, I am a lonely old man,” Youngjae ended with a joke, and Jinyoung scoffed.

“If you’re old, what am I?”

“An ancient and wise sage. Bye, hyung,” Youngjae snarked before hanging up, and Jinyoung stuck his middle finger up at the phone screen even though he knew it would do nothing. Glancing to the side, Jinyoung decided to pop into the store before heading to Jaebeom’s apartment.

He picked up a few bottles of soju and some packets of snacks before paying and leaving. Before he started driving, though, he texted Yugyeom to let him know he would be late in getting home. For some reason, Jinyoung didn’t tell the younger he was going to Jaebeom’s place, chalking it up to the fact Yugyeom would probably berate him.

He arrived at Jaebeom’s floor, letting himself in with the key given to him when the apartment was leased, and saw something he hadn’t meant to.

Jinyoung was going to confess.

Really.

He was.

But Jaebeom was shirtless, and there was a naked man. Yes, man. Standing next to him. And when Jinyoung says naked, he means naked. The man had nothing but a pair of lace underwear on, and one of Jaebeom’s tank tops. Something he did not want to see. And definitely not next to Jaebeom.

Jinyoung dropped the bag of food and just as Jaebeom opened his mouth in disbelief, booked it out of the apartment. Jinyoung forwent the elevator, just thundering down the stairs and into his car before driving just past the speed limit to reach his home.

When he burst into his door, Yugyeom looked up, shocked at his brother’s face. Before Yugyeom could even say anything, Jinyoung choked out a, “Don’t,” before practically running into his room and slamming the door.

A reasonable reaction.

What wasn’t a reasonable reaction, however, was the fact that Jinyoung stayed holed up in his room for a week. Yugyeom tried picking the lock, but Jinyoung had moved his desk in front of the door. He only took the food left in front of the door once it was cold, and answered no calls.

Worried was an understatement when it came to how his friends and family were feeling. His mother called multiple times at the prodding of Yugyeom, and hell, even Youngjae came over to try to coax him out of his room.

Jinyoung wouldn’t budge, however. He refused to even open the door. It just hurt. Jinyoung didn’t know the exact reason.

Was it the fact Jaebeom never told him he was gay? Jinyoung knew it could have been a one time thing or the older had just found out, but it still hurt. Maybe it was because Jinyoung had finally picked up the courage to tell Jaebeom how he felt, but then...that situation happened.

Jinyoung doesn’t even want to think about it, but he couldn’t. He tried opening his laptop to work, but his mind inevitably wandered to Jaebeom and the stranger’s look of surprise. He tried reading his English dictionary, but he saw the notes Jaebeom doodles in them in secondary school, and his heart wrenched.

He knew he was wallowing, he knew it was insanely and exceedingly unhealthy. But staying in his room and crying just seemed so much safer than going out into the world.

But Yugyeom was not having any of that. He was not ready to watch his older brother decay, and so, forced the door open and pushed the desk forward just enough to get through and into Jinyoung’s room, closing and locking the door behind him.

“Hyung, talk to me,” Yugyeom pleaded when he sat on the bed next to Jinyoung’s bundled up body.

Hearing his baby brother on the verge of tears and begging, Jinyoung finally released the dam, head buried in the younger one’s lap. He sobbed for hours, Yugyeom just petting his hair. He didn’t know how long he cried, but he did know at some point, he had fallen back asleep. Crying takes a lot of energy, you know.

When he wakes up, Yugyeom is still there, still holding him. “Hyung, do you want to talk about it,” Yugyeom tried to coax Jinyoung to speak, and Jinyoung sighed. He really couldn’t wallow all week about this; this was just sad.

Jinyoung swallowed once, twice, then started to explain. The entire time, Yugyeom kept a neutral face, but Jinyoung could see the pity in his eyes. “So...in conclusion, I’m an idiot,” Jinyoung laughed, voice rasped and tired.

Yugyeom clucked his tongue, sighing. “No, hyung, you’re not. You were just shocked and hurt. We can’t help how we feel.” Jinyoung shrugged.

“I know, Gyeom-ah. I just don’t want it to hurt that much.” Yugyeom nodded and Jinyoung returned his head to his younger brother’s lap.

“Hyung, I’m going to take you out.” Jinyoung’s eyes snapped to Yugyeom’s face, and Yugyeom blanched. “Not like that, dumbass! I’ll take you around town tomorrow; we’ll just forget the past few days, all right? Ten hyung will be in the dance studio as well, and you can meet him.”

Jinyoung just grunted, worn out, and Yugyeom petted him back to sleep, slipping out of the room and into the kitchen where Jaebeom was waiting worriedly. “Is he doing all right?” was the first question out of Jaebeom’s mouth, and Yugyeom shrugged.

“He’s as good as he’ll be, hyung. He’s unhappy, maybe disappointed, but I don’t know when he will be out of his funk,” Yugyeom explained. “I’m taking him to meet Ten hyung tomorrow, hopefully that can get his mind off the fact you never told him you were bi. He must have felt so hurt seeing you.” Yugyeom wisely left out the part where Jinyoung also had a crush on him.

From the tone of his voice, Jaebeom could tell Yugyeom was mad at him. “Look, I didn’t...I didn’t think it was important.” Jaebeom wrung his hands. “Not that I didn’t want to tell him. I just-”

“Don’t give me excuses,” Yugyeom snapped. “You hurt my brother. Unintentional, or not, you withheld it for your own personal reasons. I can’t stay angry for long, but I advise you to get out of the apartment for now.” Jaebeom took a step back, pausing, but left soon after.

Yugyeom slumped over the counter, tired out. He hadn’t meant to snap at Jaebeom; who was he to be angry about Jaebeom hiding when he had done the same thing to Jinyoung? Well, the difference was that Jinyoung hyung doesn’t have a crush on me, he thought.

He really hoped meeting Ten hyung would bring Jinyoung out of his slump, but he doubts that it would happen. But maybe, just for a short while, it would distract Jinyoung.

So, when Yugyeom drove Jinyoung to the studio and Ten hyung was waiting outside, he really didn’t expect Jinyoung to laugh and say, “Oh, the lost guy! I didn’t know you were Yugyeomie’s ‘Ten hyung.’”

“Hyung, you know him?” Jinyoung nodded.

“Yeah, when I was driving BamBam to work, he asked me for directions.” Yugyeom’s mouth dropped open.

“No way,” he laughed. “Hyung, you literally know everyone.” Jinyoung snorted, pulling Yugyeom’s ear, and the three of them headed into the dance studio.

“Ten hyung, did you know Jinyoungie used to be a dancer as well?” Yugyeom began to say, and Jinyoung groaned, attempting to swat at Yugyeom.

“Kim Yugyeom, I swear-” Yugyeom dodged him, cackling. Ten watched, amused.

“Well. I’m sure you will be able to keep up with me and Yugyeom, then?” Jinyoung shook his head.

“Oh, no no, I’m not going to dance.” Yugyeom smirked, and Jinyoung rolled his eyes. “Seriously. You can’t make me.”

Jinyoung flopped on the ground, sweaty and tired. “Love you too, hyung,” Yugyeom teased, poking Jinyoung’s sweaty forehead. Jinyoung grabbed the younger’s hand, pulling him down to wrestle, and Ten laughed.

“Okay, you two kids, no more fooling around,” Ten jokingly reprimanded. “Jinyoung-ssi; I didn’t expect you to catch up to me and Yugyeom this easily.”

Jinyoung snorted, flicking his hair out of his face. “I’m not that old, you know. I’m only, what, two years older than you? It’s only been three years since I graduated, too.”

Ten’s head cocked. “Really? I didn’t know that. Somehow I thought you would be older.” His lips pulled into a sweet smile, and Jinyoung could see Yugyeom mirror the smile. He laughed internally at his brother’s obvious crush. It was wholesome, cute, and not like his own trash bin of a love life. He winced at the memory of Jaebeom’s face when he caught him at his apartment yesterday, and the motion didn’t go unnoticed by Yugyeom.

“Hyung, do you wanna get us something to eat? I want to ask Ten hyung something.” Jinyong nodded quickly, eager to get his thoughts out of the dumpster.

“Yeah, I’ll just pop over to the convenience store a block down, do you guys want anything specific?”

After Ten and Yuyeom threw their dozens of orders at him and Jinyoung forced them to write it down, he slipped out the door and studio, walking down the road in the brisk and cool weather. Unfortunately, Jinyoung had forgotten his jacket. The sun was out, though, so Jinyoung wasn’t too unhappy. It was just a quick walk and the store would probably be warmer than outside.

Inside the store, Jinyoung was in the middle of a purchase, when he heard his name being called. “Jinyoung-ssi!” Ten was waving to him from outside the store. Jinyoung finished up his purchase, taking the plastic bag and meeting Ten outside as the two of them began the way back.

“Hey, Ten. What’s up?”

“I wanted to return your jacket; it’s a bit windy.” A pause, and then Ten opened his mouth, “Jinyoung-ssi, does Yugyeom have a crush on me?”

Jinyoung choked on the juice pack he had opened on the walk. “You should ask him that yourself, Ten-ah.”

Ten ignored him, going on with his thoughts. “I like him, but not in that way. And I don’t want to let him down; he’s a good friend.”

Jinyoung sighed. “Ten, seriously. You need to ask Yugyeom yourself, and tell him yourself. He’s a good kid, and sensible. He won’t take it to heart.”

“I suppose so.” They’re quiet until they reach the building, where Yugyeom was waiting in the lobby.

“We’re not supposed to eat in the dance room, so we gotta eat here, hyungs,” Yugyeom said, taking the bag from Jinyoung and rifling through it for his tteokbokki chips. “Ah, hyung, you forgot my sweet potato snacks.”

Jinyoung rolled his eyes. “Yugyeom, you consume an unholy amount of those at the apartment, you can deal with me forgetting them this time.” At Ten’s look, he added, “I’m running to the bathroom. Don’t touch my snacks.”

While in the bathroom, Jinyoung debated listening in the hallway to hear what Ten and Yugyeom had to say, but he decided against it. Yugyeom was old enough to make decisions himself.

As he waited for a reasonable amount of time for Ten and Yugyeom to stop talking, his phone binged with a text from the unknown number from earlier. The text read, ‘This is Mark, Youngjae’s roommate,’ and Jinyoung paused.

He took a screenshot, sending it to Youngjae, but the younger didn’t respond. He’s probably busy at Ars. As he slipped his phone back into his pocket, he stepped into the hallway where Ten was waiting. “Hey, Jinyoung-ssi. So. Would you like good news or bad news first?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well,” Ten smiled awkwardly, “Yugyeom felt like he needed space to get over me, so he went home. The good news is he still wants to be friends as well. The bad news is that I take the bus and can’t give you a ride home.”

Jinyoung sighed, running a hand through his hair. Of course Yugyeom would do that. “It’s fine, I’ll just call a friend to take me home,” he bit out, not quite angry but not exactly happy either.

He called Jackson almost immediately. “Hey, Park Gae, what’s up?”

“Jackson, I need a ride home. Yugyeom left me at the dance studio.” Jinyoung ripped his phone away from his ear. Jackson had yelled into the phone with excitement.

“Dance? I didn’t know you danced, Jinyoungie-ah! I wanna see you sometime!”

“Yeah, no,” Jinyoung said almost immediately, “but I do need a ride home.”

Jackson laughed. “About that...sorry, no can do. I’m out of town for the weekend. I know you’re not on speaking terms with Jaebeom, but you could try to ask him. I don’t know what’s going on with you two. But I’m sure he’ll be fine with driving you.”

“...Yeah.” Jackson hung up, unaware of Jinyoung’s hesitation. Looks like he’s out of the option. Jinyoung rang up Youngjae next, but he didn’t answer again. Looks like Jinyoung needed to take the bus. As he pocketed his phone, that unknown number from earlier claiming they were Mark called, and Jinyoung, at his wit’s end, answered.

“Is this Park Jinyoung?” The voice on the other end was deep, especially through the phone, and Jinyoung felt like if he wasn’t so obsessed with Jaebeom, he might fall in love with this voice as well.

“Yes, why?” The voice laughed.

“I’m Youngjae’s roommate. Youngjae, say hi to your ex.” Jinyoung choked, and he could hear Youngjae in the background.

“Why are you calling Jinyoung? How’d you get his number?” Jinyoung couldn’t not laugh at the confusion laced in Youngjae’s voice.

“Anyways,” Mark, Jinyoung presumed, continued on, “I texted you because I have something I need to clear up with you. Can we meet up?”

Jinyoung frowned. “What do you need to clear up? I’ve never met you in my life.”

“You’ve met me once. At Jaebeom’s apartment.” Jinyoung’s heart raced.

“I’m not sure I would want to meet up with you, then. For one, you slept with my best friend when I didn’t even know my best friend liked men,” Jinyoung took a deep breath.  “And for two, I saw your dick hanging out some lacy underwear. I don’t think I could look at you straight in the eye after that.”

Mark laughed loudly, and if he strained his ears, Jinyoung could hear Youngjae in the back laughing just as loudly. “Yeah, I’m really sorry about that. That...was not what was supposed to happen. Look, man, I promise I’m not evil. Ars is closed today; I’ll even bring Youngjae along. Is that fine with you?”

Jinyoung sighed. “Sure. I guess so. You’re going to have to pick me up though, Yugyeom left me at Easy Dance Studio.” Mark snorted.

“Is this your super secret plan to use me as a chauffeur?” Jinyoung finally laughed at that, agreeing between breaths. “I knew it. We’ll be there in ten minutes.”

They were five minutes late, but Jinyoung didn’t think about it. He was too busy trying to avoid Mark’s eyes as he slid into the backseat and fiddled with his fingers. “Hey, Jinyoung,” Youngjae leaned around the passenger seat, offering Jinyoung a soft smile. “How was your week?”

“Shitty-” Jinyoung said without thinking, and both Mark and Youngjae laughed.

“Sounds like it,” Mark said, and paused for a split second before words came tumbling out of his mouth. To be honest, half of it was in English and Jinyonug only understood the words ‘sorry,’ and ‘Jaebeom,’ and ‘never.’

“Hold up, Mark-ssi. Can you speak in Korean?” Jinyoung asked, furrowing his brows, and Mark laughed, albeit a bit more strained.

“Yeah. Sorry. I wasn’t sleeping with Jaebeom. That’s the first thing I should start out with. I had sex with Jackson, and I wasn’t aware Jackson had a roommate. But when I woke up, Jackson had left for out of town, which was kind of dumb. Who leaves a stranger in their apartment?”

Youngjae prodded Mark. “Hyung. Off topic.”

“Sorry, sorry. But Jaebeom was there, and he had lent me a tank top, though none of his pants stayed up. Apparently Jackson had thought Jaebeom would get rid of me if I tried anything. That was when you walked in. And you entered. Though correctly, you had assumed Jaebeom was not straight and hadn’t told you. But we never fucked.”

Jinyoung sat in the backseat in complete silence for the rest of the ride, and both Mark and Youngjae felt they shouldn’t say any more. But when they reached his apartment, before leaving, Jinyoung spoke. “Thank you for telling me, Mark. I’ll have to talk to Jaebeom soon. But I appreciate it, and if I could ever get the image of your penis out of my head, I’d love to be your friend.”

Mark chuckled. “That sounds great. Please do not think about my penis, even if I know it’s great.” Youngjae choked, slapping Mark on the back.

“Hyung! Don’t praise your dick in front of me and Jinyoungie hyung.”

Jinyoung rolled his eyes and smiled, getting out of the car and waving at the two friends as they drove off. Once they were out of sight, he stood in front of his apartment building for a few minutes before heading up.

Yugyeom was out, having left a note dictating he was hanging out with BamBam, so Jinyoung took this opportunity to text Jaebeom and asked him to come over. Jaebeom had replied almost instantaneously with confirmation, and Jinyoung waited in anticipation.

Jaebeom didn’t live too far, so he only had to wait fifteen minutes, though they felt like hours. The sound of the door unlocking caused Jinyoung to whip his head toward the kitchen entrance, locking eyes with Jaebeom as he rounded the corner.

“Hi.” Jinyoung broke the ice first, and Jaebeom immediately added a hyung to the end of that, as per habit, before he started crying. “Oh, hyung.” Jinyoung immediately came around the island, wrapping an arm around Jaebeom.

The two stayed like that in silence save the refrigerator humming. When Jaebeom finally got all his tears out, he whispered out an, “I’m so sorry,” and Jinyoung’s heart broke once again.

“Hyung, don’t be sorry.” Jaebeom shook his head, and Jinyoung quieted.

“No, Nyoungie, let me finish.” Jaebeom took a few deep breaths. “I’m sorry I never told you I was bisexual. It sounds stupid of me, but I was scared how you would react. I know you are for the LGBT+ community, but when I found out I was, I didn’t know. And then I just kept it a secret for so long; I never felt like it would ever be the right time to tell you. I’m sorry I hurt you and lied to you.”

Jinyoung laughed through his own tears. “Hyung, I haven’t been completely honest with you either.” Jaebeom quieted, and Jinyoung took the opportunity. His heart hurt from pounding so hard against his ribcage, but it was now or never. “I’ve been in love with you for years, since before college.”

Jaebeom says nothing for a minute, and Jinyoung can feel his heart drop. When Jaebeom shifted, Jinyoung kept his eyes trained forward until he felt Jaebeom’s breath on his jawline. The younger turned; confused, when Jaebeom leaned forward, pressing his lips against Jinyoung’s.

“Jaebeom hyung?” When their lips part, Jinyoung asks the only question on his mind.

“We’re both idiots, huh?” Jaebeom snorted, and even with the tears running down his face and the wet noise, Jinyoung had never seen someone more beautiful. “I love you too.”

Jinyoung’s mouth dropped open, and Jaebeom laughed again. “Hyung, please don’t joke around like that,” Jinyoung pleaded, but Jaebeom shook his head.

“No, Jinyoungie. I promise. I’m not. I know it may not have seemed that way, but I promise I do. I do. I love you.” Jinyoung cried again.

He’s never cried so much over the span of ten days, much less a year. But somehow, this seemed worth it.

[cuddletime-blog]

Shaw and Rainy’s First Date

"Not this one either." I mumble under my breath as my fingers wander across countless hard plastic covers. People rarely come to such retro shops nowadays, but there's something I'm looking for. It's a specific album, a single song that I haven't been able to get out of my head since the first time I heard it on that fateful bus ride. A brilliant and especially confident pair of amber eyes flash in my mind just as my hand hovers above a single album case on the shelf.

“Green Day’s Holiday,” I say aloud without thinking, reaching out for it in surprise. I didn’t think I’d find it in such a small CD shop! Just as my fingers are about to close around it, however, the album was snatched up before I could even touch it. “Hey-“ I begin to say with a protest, turning around to look at the only other customer in the store, only for my words to be caught in my throat when I see his face. Think of the devil…Unforgettable amber eyes gleam, looking straight at me in the dim light as he grins, holding up a familiar album in between studded black leather gloves.

A taller male figure stands there in front of me with lilac hair, soft bangs slightly parted on his forehead. He was wearing a black leather jacket, white and black undershirts, tiny silver hoop earrings and studs, a black necklace, multiple beaded and black leather strap bracelets, ripped skinny jeans, and black combat boots. I exclaim, “It’s you…that guy on the bus with me that time with the skateboard!”

The young man’s eyebrows raised a bit after hearing that I remembered him and he said, “Funny running into you again so soon, Rainy. We must have an unusually special fate or something. The name’s Shaw.” He held Green Day’s American Idiot album way up high out of my reach. I tried standing on my tip toes to grab it, but I still couldn’t reach it. Shaw then held the CD behind his back a whole arm’s length behind him, grinning mischievously the whole time.

Finally, he gave the CD to me just before I was about to lose my temper completely and said, “So you liked that song Holiday last time, right? I can recommend other similar CDs to you. Dookie is an older album, but there are good songs on it too.” I nodded and followed along after him to look at some albums he pointed out to me. I ended up purchasing 4 CDs from the store and thanked Shaw, but he said, “It’s no big deal. You can thank me for those CD recommendations in a much more interesting way than that. Let’s make a bet. Loser has to do whatever the winner decides. I’m feeling quite hungry now so I bet you that you can’t eat the 3 spiciest foods on the McLovers menu.”

Shaw challenged me to eat the double cheeseburger with habanero peppers, habanero and serrano peppers carne asada burrito, and jalapeno Tapatio hot sauce cheese fries. We ordered a variety of sodas and milkshakes to try different flavor combinations. I lost the spicy eating challenge, but Shaw wiped some hot sauce with his index finger from the corner of my lips. He licked his finger and I blushed. Then he said, “Today’s meal was great. I’m stuffed! I bet you can’t eat spicy hotpots and 3x spicy ramen so we’ll eat those for our food challenge rematch next time.”

I glared at him, saying: “I won’t back down so easily, Mr. Hot Shawt. I’ll win the next round, you’ll see!” I dipped my plain fries into my chocolate milkshake and held them to his mouth, urging him to try the fries and eat them. “It’s more delicious this way, right?” I asked him. He ate half of my fries and drank some of the chocolate milkshake. I felt glad I showed him a new way to eat our favorite foods. I smiled boldly and said, “Now why don’t you try those chicken nuggets with 3x spicy hot sauces and this orange and grape soda vanilla ice cream float?” Shaw chuckled and said, “Well why don’t you try it first, Rainy?” Thus, Shaw and I had an adventurous and memorable fast food-filled first date.

@meowrain @stehkotori Thank you very much. Gracias! Obrigada!...Huge thank you in fact to my Beta Readers @goddess-of-night-and-books @redqueenschoice @belovedstill

I couldn’t have finished writing this fic without your ideas, inspiration, and overall help!

[theirmajesty2139]

could we get the sexual alphabet for Trager?? i just know he’s a wildcard

Trager sexual headcannon alphabet

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

No aftercare at all. He gives no fucks if you’re hurting. That being said he will make sure you’ve eaten and drank some water so that you don’t die on him.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

That’s a tricky question. If he had to choose a favourite body part he’d probably chop it off and keep it. For your sake I won’t pick one. He thinks he has a nice butt and likes to show off them cheeks.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

He’s always thought about cutting a hole into you just so he has a new place to cum. If you’re lucky he might sew it all back up afterwards. He likes to see his victims *cough* I mean partners soaked with his cum.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He often thinks about eventually settling down and having a life with one of his partners. He just has to pick one with a very high pain tolerance.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Not when it comes to surgery but definitely when it comes to sex. He started young and has always been able to talk whoever he wants into bed with him.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying.)

He’s done everything and has liked it every way. My man has worked his way through the whole index of exotic sex positions. His go to position is to lay his partner on their front with their legs spread and fuck them from behind.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He will make jokes but you won’t be laughing. His forte is dad humour and sarcasm

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He’s proud of his body hair. He’s got scraggly grey-blonde hair down there. It’s not too thick but impossibly long. He doesn’t keep it groomed anymore.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Never. He might give you a bouquet of severed fingers or a tongue or something but you’re not getting any cuddles or sweet words from this man.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

He touches himself over a freshly slain corpse, using the image of its guts and the power he felt cutting them down to get himself off. He licks his lips, tasting the fresh blood as it mixes with his saliva.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Just one? He has them all. His favourites all involve inflicting pain and using sharp objects. He’s also fond of bondage. He always ties the rope too tightly. is hearing yourself talk a kink? Because he’s got it.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Tied to a surgical table in his office. He loves playing doctor. Bonus points if the table is metal and has restraints.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Gore. Anything wet and bloody gets him really hard. It also helps if you stroke his ego. Tell him how powerful he is and that you couldn’t stop him even if you wanted to.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Vanilla sex is a no. If you can’t keep him interested you’ll probably end up dead. Other than that he’s up for anything and everything.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

He has a devils tongue in more than one way. He will definitely torture you with it. He will take you to the brink of orgasm and then stop over and over again. Ruining orgasms via oral sex is his favourite hobby.

He will pull out all your teeth and fuck your bloody, gummy mouth.

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast and rough or slow and rough? It doesn’t matter. He will have fun ether way. His partner has to be a huge masochist to keep up with him.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

What’s the point? He can’t get into the 'real fun' with a limited time window. He cracks easily under pressure and will probably mess things up.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Is there a risk to you or him? Because if it’s a risk to you he gives no fucks. You can die it will make no difference to him, it might actually turn him on more.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

For your sake I’m going to say that his stamina is quite low due to the fact that he is very skinny. He needs to have a rest before he starts again and you’ll be grateful because otherwise there will be blood.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Does surgical equipment count? because he has lots of that! He has every toy to do with bondage that exists. my man is a sadist.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

It depends on what kind of mood he’s in. You might want to keep him going because if he gets bored it’s not looking very good for you...

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Don’t worry about that. You won’t get him over the sound of your own screaming.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

He’s actually a bit of a masochist and he daydreams about having a partner who will fight their way out of their restraints, pin him down and dominate him. He would never admit this but it’s what he looks for in a partner.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

His cock is long and thin. He is uncut and he has a lot of thin Wiery pubic hair. It looks like he’s never washed it and it probably smells bad.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Depends on the situation. If there is blood involved then his sex drive will be boosted. He needs to satisfy his desires in one way or another so if you don’t satisfy him sexually you’re probably going to end up paying for it with your life.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He doesn’t sleep. He just can’t. He doesn’t mind though it gives him more time for… Other things.

[arcpeacegonow]

FINDING HOME (A SANDERS SIDES FANFIC)

CHAPTER ONE: JANUS

Logan loves baking. LOVES it. Cooking? Not so much. Cooking involves a lot of improvising and making adjustments that feel right. It’s less of an exact science and has more wiggle room for doing whatever you want. Sure, Logan will get in the mood to experiment with dishes, but otherwise he leaves the cooking to Patton.

But baking?

Baking is Logan’s way of relaxing. It’s all precise measurements and careful direction reading. After a stressful day of working through Thomas’s schedule and helping him stay on task, Logan will sometimes just take over the kitchen and bake. He especially likes baking because the others love to eat whatever dessert he’s cooked up. Not only that, but when Logan is struggling to offer emotional support or comfort for one of the others, he’ll bake them their favourite dessert.

Virgil’s having a bad day where everything’s just too much? An hour or so later, Logan is knocking at his door, a giant chocolate chip cookie with a scoop of ice cream in his hands. Patton having a day where the blues just won’t let up? Boom, Logan’s whipping out a chocolate lava cake. Roman wants to have a treat himself day after a particularly successful performance? The mixed berry pie is almost ready to be taken out of the oven and oh boy does that crust look just delicious (the secret ingredient is a spoonful of extra lemon juice or vanilla).

Logan keeps a special recipe book full of everyone’s favourite baked goods. He writs in extra notes about how Patton really likes just about any dessert that involves pastry because yum, how Virgil prefers chocolate desserts when his anxiety is running particularly high but on good days prefers berry tarts, how Roman adores cinnamon rolls and anything that has a kick or spice to it, and how Remus loves to have as many gummy worms in chocolate mud pies as possible.

But somehow, he keeps overlooking Deceit. Deceit, who has one bad day after another. Deceit, who keeps messing up and hiding because he’s afraid they’ll yell at him. Deceit, who everyone hates. Deceit, who cries when no one’s around and lies about it. (What’s wrong with you, Deceit?” “Maybe I’m a liar.”). He doesn’t mean to, it’s just that Deceit isn’t around the other Sides much.

Then one day Patton asks if anyone’s seen Deceit, Thomas needs to lie about forgetting to study. And the Sides realise no one’s seen him in days. They elect Logan to find him, and Logan looks.

And looks.

And looks.

And looks.

And l o o k s.

And finally, finds Deceit in his room, curled up into a ball on his bed, crying while wearing one of Virgil’s hoodies.

“Deceit?” Logan knocks lightly, and feels ashamed when Deceit flinches.

“W- what did I do wrong th- this time?” Deceit chokes out through his tears, and Logan belatedly realises Deceit has feelings.

Deceit has feelings, and not one of the Sides has ever said a kind word to him. Deceit has feelings, and the Sides might very well have made him depressed because of their insensitivity.

Deceit has feelings, and Logan makes a choice to try and help him. He’s just as important as the other Sides, isn’t he?

“We’re worried about you. No one’s seen you in days…” Logan trails off, unsure how to continue.

“How long?” Deceit asks in the choked up voice Logan is trying to get used to.

“What?” Logan doesn’t know what he means.

“How long did it take you to notice I was gone?” Deceit asks.

Logan can’t lie, Deceit will know if he does.

“Today. Patton brought it to attention because Thomas needs to lie.” Logan says, knowing Deceit will want the full truth.

“Do you want to know how long I’ve been in here, hoping one of you would notice? And when you finally do, it’s only because you need me to do something?” Deceit says, and Logan is slowly getting used to the choked up voice.

Deceit won’t lie about this, Logan knows. He doesn’t know how to act, and that means he doesn’t know how to fake the pain in his voice.

“How long?” Logan asks, sitting on the edge of the bed and knowing he won’t like the answer.

It still comes as a shock when he hears it.

“Three months.” Deceit whispers, and starts crying harder.

Logan doesn’t know what to do. His usual choice would be to bake something, but he doesn’t know what type of dessert Deceit likes.

He suddenly realises no one knows what Deceit likes to eat. Have any of them even seen Deceit eat anything?

“Deceit…” Logan wants to hug the deceptive side, knowing instinctually that this isn’t a trick.

They didn’t notice he was gone for three months. Twelve weeks. Eighty-four days. Two thousand sixteen hours. One hundred twenty thousand nine hundred sixty minutes. Seven million two hundred fifty-seven thousand six hundred seconds. Deceit was alone for every single one.

“Y- you’re gonna yell a- at me.” Deceit hiccups.

“No, no. I promise I won’t.” Logan tells him, hoping the depressed Side will hear he’s telling the truth.

Deceit looks at him, and tries to smile. It comes out broken looking. Logan hugs him, hoping it will comfort Deceit.

“W- what?” Deceit sniffs, and Logan holds the Side as he cries more.

“I’m so sorry we didn’t notice sooner, De.” Logan tries out a nickname he’d been using in his head to make the Side seem less evil.

“W- why are you touching me? I th- thought you hated me…” Deceit’s crying, and Logan’s heart breaks.

“I never hated you, De. I just didn’t like the lying.” Logan says truthfully, knowing he’ll lose all hope of bringing Deceit back to his old self if he lies.

“I- I didn’t like lying e- either.” Deceit admits through his tears, and Logan holds him for a while longer before moving to let go.

Deceit grabs onto Logan’s shirt, and it worries Logan how weak the hold is.

“Do you want me to make you something, De?” Logan asks, wanting Deceit back to his usual sarcastic self.

“W- will the others y- yell at me?” Deceit whispers, and Logan wants to reassure him they won’t.

But he doesn’t know if they will or not.

“I don’t know. Do you feel up to eating?” Logan asks.

“B- but then they’ll y- yell at me and g- get me in trouble with T- Thomas for being g- gone.” Deceit cries harder if possible and buries his face into Logan’s shirt.

Logan feels like absolute crap when he realises he can count Deceit’s ribs. He’s been starving himself.

“And I’ll defend you. It’s our fault you feel like this, so it’s our fault you’ve been gone.” Logan assures him, and helps Deceit stand.

The Side’s legs buckle under his measly weight, and Logan helps him walk to the others after helping Deceit hang Virgil’s old hoodie up in the closet.

“Deceit, Thomas needs to lie about forgetting to study.” Patton says without looking up.

“First we have to discuss a very big issue. Look at what we made him do.” Logan doesn’t care that his voice breaks.

The other sides (Patton, Virgil, Roman, Remus) look up.

“Good to see you’ve been getting exercise, Deceit. You’ve been getting fat.” Remus says, none of the Sides realising just how skinny Deceit was.

“He hasn’t been getting exercise.” Logan interjects, trying to get them to understand.

“Deceit, you’ve gotten paler.” Roman says with a crease to his brow, starting to catch on.

“Do you want me to tell them how I found you?” Logan asks Deceit quiet enough the others don’t hear, noticing how the shaky Side clings to the newfound comfort he’s giving him.

Deceit looks down and nods.

“He was on his bed crying, thinking we hated him. He’s been starving himself because he’s scared we’ll yell at him if he shows up outside of his room. It’s because of our actions that Deceit is like this.” Logan hates how his voice chokes up, making it hard to say the words.

Unsurprisingly, Virgil is the first to walk towards Deceit. Everyone notices how he flinches away and clings tighter to Logan’s sleeve.

“I- i’m sorry I’ve been b- bad. Please don’t g- get me in trouble w- with Thomas.” Deceit whispers, and the rest of the Sides notice he’s been crying.

Virgil looks hurt upon seeing how Deceit flinches away from him.

Deceit knows Logan hasn’t lied to him since finding him, but the last time he saw the others they were yelling at him for making Thomas lie. They’d wanted him to make Thomas lie in the first place, and then they’d yelled at him for it.

Logan murmurs something to Deceit the others can’t hear, and Deceit nods.

“He hadn't come out of his room for three months before we noticed.” Logan tells them, and even Remus looks like he feels bad for doing that to one of their own.

Patton bursts into tears over what he and the others did.

Deceit still looks like he’s expecting one of them to yell at him. Logan helps Deceit into the kitchen, and then helps him into one of the chairs.

“I could bake you something, De.” He offers, an extremely small, almost genuine smile lights up Deceit’s face.

“B- blueberry?” He mumbles, and Logan beams at the progress then deflates as he remembers Remus ate the last of the blueberries last week.

“I could ask one of the others to buy blueberries, or we could go ourselves. Remus ate the last of them last week. I’m really sorry, De.” Logan frowns, and almost wants to cry when he sees Deceit’s smile disappear.

“...” Deceit mumbles something Logan doesn’t catch.

“Could you say that a bit louder?” Logan asks softly, knownig he can’t raise his voice or Deceit will think he’s mad.

“I- I miss when we p- picked blueberries.” Deceit whispers, and Logan hugs him gently.

“We can go tomorrow if you want? Right now it’s too dark.” Logan says quietly, and lets himself smile when Deceit leans into him.

Deceit nods slightly, and lets Logan back up a bit.

“C- can I have some g- grape juice?” Deceit asks quietly, and Logan looks in the fridge.

He grins when he finds the grape juice too sweet for any of them that they still kept for some reason. It was probably Deceit’s, and Logan made sure to be careful as he brought the cup over to the depressed Side.

“Here you go, De.” Logan says quietly, getting the feeling that Deceit’s ears are sensitive after those few months in silence.

Deceit almost smiles, Logan can tell. He’s really trying to be happy, and that’s all Logan can ask after what they did to him.

“You deserve to be treated just like everyone else here, De. I’m sorry I didn’t realise it sooner.” Logan knows any progress he makes with Deceit will be destroyed the second he lies.

It was ironic that Deceit preferred the truth, but Logan wasn’t going to tease him. The corners of Deceit’s mouth lift up, and Logan almost grins.

“J- Janus.” Deceit whispers, barely loud enough for Logan to hear.

“What?” Logan doesn’t understand.

“M- my name. It’s J- Janus.” Deceit whispers.

Logan feels honoured Deceit- Janus, trusts him with this information. He wouldn't tell the Side’s name until he was okay with it.

“Is it okay if I still call you De? So the others don’t overhear your name?” Logan suggests, and since Deceit- sorry, Janus, can tell he’s sincere, he nods.

“I t- trust you.” Janus wants to smile, he really does.

Logan is showing him the first bits of kindness he’s ever known since being formed as a Side. The first bits of kindness that are directed at him, anyway.

Janus finishes his juice, and Logan gently takes the cup so Janus doesn’t hurt himself trying to help. It really worries Logan how much weight the Side has lost.

“Do you wanna watch a movie, De?” Logan asks, and is surprised at the answer he gets.

“A- Aladdin?” Janus asks, his yellow eyes wide and hopeful.

“Of course.” Logan smiles and helps him off the chair.

Janus wants to get away from the contact; Logan should hate him just like everyone else does, after all. Except he knows now that Logan doesn’t hate him, he only hates the lying. The two steadily make their way towards Janus’s room to watch Aladdin, and Logan knows that Janus is making progress. He let Logan touch him, he let Logan hug him. This much progress in a single day is impossibly good.

After a while, Janus is tired. Logan’s holding him gently, the movie isn’t too loud, he actually feels like one of the Sides care about him. But if he goes to sleep, he’ll wake up and all of it - Logan being nice, someone caring, feeling safe - will have been a dream. He doesn’t want to lose it.

“It’s okay, Janus. I’m right here, you can rest.” Logan murmurs to him, hesitantly placing a hand on the Side’s scales.

Janus welcomes the reassuring touch, leaning into Logan’s hand and relaxing. In his head he knew he was safe, but there was always the fear the others would hurt him. Logan kisses Janus’s forehead, and the smaller Side curls up almost contentedly.

“I won’t leave.” Logan promises as Janus slowly falls asleep, curled into him.

And he means it.