#if i want to stress tf out and work on them until the last minute it's every 4 days

[yangjeongin]

ya girl is working so hard on shit y’all won’t even see until FEBRUARY

[ssuperficialspacecadett]

W o w

2 more stellar chapters!!!!! I can’t wait for our fav receptionist to try out being a ring girl! (Is the asshole guy gonna try something and we get to see Frankie/the guys jump in? Bc protective men is 😭😭)

Anyway I love love love how you wrote the guy’s relationships with each other!!!!

If and only if inspiration strikes, I would love a scene from a “guys night”

Either before our girls comes into their lives or after, just then having fun and being them 🥹 bc I feel a lot of fics over look the importance of their friendship esp in regard to Frankie like Frankie fics will sometimes act like he has had no support until the girl comes in his life but yours just shows how much they all love each other

Doesn’t gotta be long (or even at all!) maybe just a nice lil thing 🥰

Ily have a wonderful day!!

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Best Friends, Beers, and Bets - Through the Scope Drabble

Rating: everyone (just the boys being silly and goofy together)

Word Count: 1K

Notes: hi everyone ! i know i have been gone for a hot minute and i am deeply sorry about that. there has been a lot of not so fabulous things going on in my life and in my mental state that has left with with little motivation to write. the worst part is? im 3/4 done with chapter 11 ... like girl plz just finish that hoe DAMN ! but i found the motivation today to write for this lovely ask i received a little bit ago (: i love the idea of getting to take a peak inside how the TF boys are before Estrella came into the picture. so a very big thank you to @romanarose for this !! chronologically, this takes place before chapter one.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Frankie, Will, and Santi sit together in the back of The Barrel at their usual table. The bar isn't particularly full this evening, but the comforting hum of conversations emitting from the regulars fill the empty chairs. They talk and laugh amongst each other as they wait for their last member to arrive: Benny. It had been only four days since his receptionist quit, but the hurt was apparent to everyone. Usually, she was the one to help him clean up after they close the gym down for the evening. Both of them managed to get it done relatively quickly too. Unfortunately, in her absence, Benny had to do it all himself. The other guys had repeatedly offered to give him a hand in the evenings, but Benny refused. He said that he had it covered and that they should just wait for him at the bar. Not wanting to press him further, the trio would retreat across the street. 

“Here he is! We all thought you fell into the washing machine and couldn’t get out.” Santi claps Benny on the shoulder as he makes his way to buy a round for everyone. 

“You were 15 minutes slower than yesterday.” Will says, tapping his watch while his brother takes a seat next to him. 

“Gee, that makes me feel great! Fish, do you want to rub salt in my wounds too?” 

“I’m just happy you’re finally here, man.” Frankie’s eyes convey sincerity. “But you’re going to run yourself ragged doing all that clean up by yourself. Why don’t you let us help?” 

“Yeah.” Santi rejoins the table and passes out the bottles. A few seconds of silence go by as each man takes a moment to wash away the stress of their day with deep gulps of chilled liquid. “We are offering to help you clean. It’s not like you’re forcing us.” 

Will nods in agreement and tips his bottle in both Frankie and Santi’s direction.

“I just hate the idea of y’all doin’ work I’m completely capable of.” 

“It doesn’t make you any less of a man if we help you clorox a few work benches, Benny.” Frankie says gingerly.

“I know, I know. To be honest with y’all?” Benny scoots closer into the table. “It’s kinda lonely there without someone to talk to in between clients.”

“My bed is going to be kinda lonely too if it makes you feel any better.” Santi offers. 

This manages to get a laugh out of the very tired looking Benny. “Oh is it now? Poor you.”

“Poor me is right! Your receptionist may have kept you company during the day but she kept me company during the night. Now that she's quit, that means I have to as well.”

“That’s not what that means at all, Pope.” Will says with a raised eyebrow. “You can still see her even if she doesn’t work at Brass Knuckles anymore.” 

“Well she also started talking about getting exclusive…”

“And there’s the real reason!” Will laughs. 

“Can we get back to my issue?” Benny begs. “What do I do? No one has answered the ads I’ve posted online. I don’t know how much longer I can handle juggling training clients and taking care of the in between tasks.”

“What about good old fashioned paper flyers? You could give some to me to hang at the auto shop. Will could take some to the VA?”

“Absolutely not.” Santi says with conviction. “I will not have a man take this job and ruin my chances of meeting another beautiful woman.” 

“Fine.” Frankie rolls his eyes. “What about a bookstore or a coffee shop? Does that sound better to you?”

“That’s not a bad idea, but do people even read those flyers? I know I don’t.” Benny shrugs.

“Well you’re not the one that's desperate for a job. I would just make sure you print out the ads on bright paper so it catches peoples eye.” 

“That’s not a bad idea either.” Benny says to his brother. “Still, who knows how long it's going to take before someone calls about it?” 

All four men are quiet as they brainstorm possible solutions to the problem that's currently plaguing them.

“I’ve got it!” Santi snaps his fingers. “I bet you that you can’t find another receptionist within a week of the last one leaving.” 

“Pope, what the fuck?” Benny looks shocked.

“Yeah, why are you actively saying he can’t do it?” Frankie questions. 

Santi only chuckles and Will shortly joins him when he puts the pieces together in his head. 

“You cabrons aren’t listening to me. I bet you that you can’t find another receptionist within a week of the last one leaving. You’ve never backed away from a bet as long as I’ve known you, Benny.” 

“He does love to prove you wrong, Pope.” Will has his arms crossed over his stomach and they rise and fall easily as he begins laughing again. 

A look of realization settles over the two other men.

“Alright, I’ll take you up on that.” Benny and Pope shake hands across the table. “You’re a dick though. She’s been gone for four days now. I only have three days to find someone else to hire.” 

“Damn.” Pope takes a sip of his drink. “I guess you better get your ass into the printer shop tomorrow and make some flyers. If you don’t, drinks are on you when the clock runs out.” 

Will and Frankie cheer knowing that no matter how this bet ends, they will be getting free beer. 

“What happens if a man calls before a woman does?” Benny looks smugly at Pope. “I’m not goin’ to tell him no if it’s in my three day window of search time.”

“Won’t happen. I can feel it in my bones.” 

“Even if, what did you say before, a beautiful woman calls about the job, that doesn’t mean she’ll want to immediately hop into your bed.” Frankie states playfully.

“You think she’s going to want to hop into yours, Fish?”

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{tag list: @cutesyscreenname @rsquared31 @smol-beb @bitchwitch1981 @avastrasposts @hoeslingz @saltybutteredtoast @javicstories @c-justhere @pimosworld @modernperplexity @beboldbebravethings @mxtokko @moonliqhtszn @tanzthompson @megcads @myloveistoolittle @casa-boiardi @jitterbugs927 @partyofone3413 @pedrit0-pascalit0 @golden-library @pati-et-vivere @mashomasho @lilmizmoz @angstylittlepascal @sofiparallel @selflcontrol @adriennemichelle98 @painitemoondust @pedritosgirl2000 @tpwkmera @romanarose @missbabyjay @missgurrl }

[uselessmicrowave]

Hiii Microwave 💋

Could I please have a matchup with the TFP mechs? It doesn't matter which fraction! Honestly!

I'm in my early 20s, and while I may not fit the plus-sized category, I have a curvaceous figure in all the right places. Hailing from Honduras, my friends and I predominantly converse in Spanish. As an African Latina, I proudly boast a rich, dark complexion. I've chosen to dye my hair a beautiful shade of brown, which cascades down to my waist. However, if I were to pinpoint my favorite attribute, it would undoubtedly be my voice. It possesses a distinct quality that sets it apart. Past partners have described it as soothing due to its deep and nurturing tone for a cis female. But don't be fooled by my motherly nature; when provoked, I can unleash my fury and raise my voice in Spanish, regardless of the person I'm addressing. I'll continue shouting until my voice gives out, which strangely enough, my boyfriend finds alluring. Although, another thing about me is that I'm an amazing listener. And I'm VERY clingy. To be exact, I will absolutely overthink if you leave me on read for like 1 minute. And when you finally come home, I ignore you for the rest of the night. Because who tf do you think you are ignoring me like that. And last but not least, I like to spend most of my time collecting toy figures and giving them away to younger children that don't have a lot of money in their families. I tend to give stuff away due to my generous personality. If there is a child at a store who wants to buy a toy or something and their mom says that they don't have enough money, I'll gladly step up and buy the toy for them. And I would do the same for my cybertronian significant other. Even if they really don't need it, if I catch them looking at something on the Internet for quite a while, I'll get the hint and I'll buy it for them. Doesn't matter what it is. It could even be a buttplug for all I know idfc🙄

Anyways, thank you for your time ❤️

Hello! I’m going to match you with TFP Bumblebee!

(small nsfw warning)

Immediately notices your voice when you meet him. Kind of low key jealous. Just a little bit.

Don’t loose your voice shouting though! Bapy is always worried that you’re gonna strain your voice too hard and it’ll go away. He doesn’t know how humans work so Bee is worried for you.

Contradicting that last headcanon, he gets heart-optics when you yell at someone in Spanish, even if it’s him. He loves domineering/demanding/loud partners and will not be very afraid to show it. If you’re anything like that he’ll fall faceplates first into love.

It’s good that you’re a listener because he’s not very good at listening. Even if you can’t understand his beeping sounds, he’ll (if you let him) lay his helm on your lap and ramble about what slag the ‘cons tried to pull the other day or how low energon supplies are. He’s always less stressed after he talks to you.

You’ll never have to worry about being left on read with Bumblebee because if you so much as send him ‘hi,’ he’ll start a full conversation with you. He would love to talk in person instead but texting is a close second for him.

He would love to see your toy collection. They’re very different from the ones he had (when he was a sparkling) on cybertron, so just holding the toys is cool for him.

If you let him, if it’s only 100% okay with you, he’ll pick out some to bring to the base for Raph.

Let him brush/play with your hair! He’ll be so happy. From a different perspective, it looks like a schoolgirl brushing a dolls hair, he’ll kick his legs in the air too. You get your hair brushed and swarmed by kisses.

Bumblebee gets all smiley when you step up to buy a toy for a kid. Kind of a “that’s my partner!” thing, children probably see you as a hero and so does he.

When you offer to buy him something, he is grateful, but he doesn’t want to waste your money. You can buy it for him, only if you insist.

If the item is of a more sexual nature (a collar or vibrator for him, most likely) he’ll be really embarrassed that you caught him looking for things like that. “If you want to pay for it you can but only if you want to” (Bee’s doing the little 👉👈👉👈 thing as he talks to you).

[bonesandthebees]

I am so mad rn I fell asleep at like 7 pm I didn't mean to I just woke up and was hoping it was at least like idk 3 am but NO it's 11:30 pm and im not tired enough to go back to sleep so now I have to choose to either stay awake and be on my phone or lay in the dark and hope that's enough to lull me to sleep and I'm pissed bc I have a full day ahead tomorrow and I'm not asleep right now so I'm going to be miserable in the morning but I'm not staying at my house rn so my body is doing the weird thing it does when you stay at a friends house and it's weird about sleeping and I kind of wanna hurl myself off of a cliff rn and my phone is lagging as I write this out and it's pidssing me off even more

But yes I enjoyed the one shot I don't remember its name right now but the qsmp one it was very good and I loved the ichor children concept that's so cool :)

Oh anon I’m so sorry as someone who has dealt with anxiety-induced insomnia to the point where I had to get therapy for it I know the frustration with not being able to fall asleep. Currently my go to solution whenever I’m not tired and can’t sleep is the anxiety meds I got prescribed for that exact issue lol, but obviously you can’t do that so here are my tips

If possible, find some melatonin or at least see if you have chamomile tea. If you don’t have either of those, what usually works for me is to turn on a long YouTube video on my phone and just watch until I get sleepy. Old vods are always a good option if you want something to be interested in, but it’s probably better to watch them from a calmer cc (Niki had a super long let’s play series where she played a story game called beyond two souls and I used to listen to that whenever I had trouble sleeping).

My current go to for sleepy videos are either ASMR videos (but I know those aren’t everyone’s tastes), or two specific channels: Baumgartner Restoration or NileRed. Baumgartner is the channel of an art conservator who makes long and very detailed videos showing his conservation and restoration process for paintings clients send him. It’s so fascinating to watch, and his voice is really calming at the same time. I literally turn on a video of his every night before I sleep and rarely get more than 5 minutes into it before I’m passing out. NileRed is a slightly more…energized channel of a guy who does a lot of weird and cool chemistry! His voice is also really even-toned and calming to listen to, but the main reason his stuff helps me sleep is the minute he starts explaining ochem concepts I knock tf out. I did a full years worth of ochem in college it’s like an instinctual reaction to want to pass out hearing it again 😭

Anyway. Find some videos like the ones I suggested—preferably at least 45 min or longer. Just watch it and try to focus on the content rather than the fact that you can’t sleep. If you start getting sleepy, great! If you’re unsure but you’re kind of tired, try closing your eyes and just listening to the video. I’ve fallen asleep like that so many times before it’s my last resort method

Hope that helps!

(oh and last note: if you can't fall asleep again, try to remind yourself that's okay. the more you stress about not being able to sleep, the worse it'll get. even just laying in your bed with your eyes shut will help you feel more rested.)

[srirachvbi]

Sakusa and Ushijima taking care of their kids headcanons !

request:  Can I request Sakusa and Ushijima taking care of their baby when their mom!s/o isn’t here ?

a/n: yesss omi and toshi taking care of their kids when they’re babies aslfjkd i love this. tysm for the requests !! i’m really happy to be writing again since i took a break for a bit after school ended!! warnings: manga spoilers, panicking and confused fathers lol

SAKUSA KIYOOMI

why we going so fUCKING FAST DAMN WOAHHHHH

He had the week off from practices and anything else because they had just finished off the season

You, sadly, did not get the same luxury of having a whole week off because even tho your husband made enough money, you still wanted and needed a job

So you had to go to work and your guys’ nanny had called and been like “yo im sick as fuck” and Omi went “ahaha don’t come near us <3″ 

It was too last minute to hire another nanny, but he’s perfectly capable of taking care of your guys’ two month old child... right?

Wrong

It had been a few hours since you had left for work and he was having some weird staring contest with Hitoshi 

Omi knew that Toshi was going to use his diaper soon enough and he just... he was in fear

After sitting there for a few minutes, he started stress cleaning and ended up gearing up to change Toshi’s diaper

Omi: *is literally performing rituals to make sure he doesn’t get anything on him*

Hitoshi: 👁👄👁 pls clean my asscheeks i pooped <3

LMAOOO the second Omi smells the wonderful stench, he almost walks out of the house

Actually he starts to until Toshi starts sobbing and he just

“👁👄👁 they ask you how you’re doing and you have to say that you’re fine--” 

He’s wearing like an N95 mask, silicone gloves, goggles, boots (he doesn’t want to get anything on his feet if he drops it but he also struggled because who tf wears shoes in the house)

Apparently him now 

Disgrace

Toshi’s still crying and Sakusa’s really about to as well LMAO

He finally gains the courage to try and change the diaper and he begins

Even with the mask on, he can still smell the shit and he’s really about to curl up and die

Slowly he peels the dirty diaper off and internally cries as he brings it towards the trash can and realizes he just

didn’t grab another diaper

So Hitoshi’s still sobbing and Sakusa’s running across your guys’ apartment in search for the diaper box

He finds them after like three minutes and is sweating hard

Omi walks over to Hitoshi again and he’s still sniffling after crying nd he feels bad

Like yeah he hates cleaning up shit but that’s his poor son :(

So he cleans everything up and puts a new diaper on

The rest of the day actually goes pretty well unlike the half an hour where he lost probably ten years of his life

You end up coming home around 7pm and walk in on Omi cleaning the table which had food splattered everywhere

He looks so stressed and your guys’ son is just laughing so loud

You end up laughing with Hitoshi and Omi’s like “i think we need a divorce <3″

Jk

He’s actually about to cry because you’re finally home to help him with Toshi

“Never leave again” “👁👄👁 that sounds a little creepy, Yoomi” 

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

You were actually hanging out with your high school friends and he offered to take care of Riko instead of you dropping her off at your parents’ house 

He’ s a good dad!! it’s just... he’s a bit clueless sometimes and babies cry a lot

So there are moments where you’re not sure if he should be by himself with her

dw he’s gotten better since you guys first had her-- he no longer stares at Riko and asks her why she’s crying for five minutes

Anyways

He’s honestly kind of concerned that he’s not the most skilled father

Like, he’s used to being the best so why does he struggle with being a dad?

This;ll be an opportunity for him to learn !!

You actually left before Riko woke up again so he was just sitting in your guys’ shared room waiting for her to make noise

You guys have a baby monitor and he stares at it sometimes

The poor machine is super intimidated

When she starts crying, he literally sprints towards her nursery (it’s quite a sight) and accidentally opens the door with too must strength, which leads to it hitting the wall

Cue Riko crying even louder

He’s standing there like

👁👄👁

It takes a few seconds before he’s apologizing to her LMAO

“Ah. I’m sorry.” *crying gets louder*

He picks her up carefully and looks her dead in the eyes, making her stop crying

They’re staring at each other now

SHhhh they’re communicating

“I’ll give you food.” 

She was actually hungry

You’ve seen him do this-- yeah, you’re not sure how he does it either

So he brings her to the kitchen and she’s pulling on his hair

He do be used to it tho 👀

It takes him like ten minutes to find the milk formula thing because every second he tried to put Riko down, she’d cry

So he adjusted and has her literally in the PALM OF HIS HAND

It takes a longer than necessary to read it because he started reading the ingredients and all of the information on the back

Pls Ushijima... 

He throws that bitch (not literally) into the microwave and heats the milk up for her

Meanwhile she’s started to chew on his hands and he’s so confused

“Why are you chewing on my hand? It is not food, Riko.” *CHOMP* 

When her milks done, he struggles to figure out how to hold her but it’s okay, it works out in the end

The rest of the day is full of the same confusion and by the time you come home, you see him reading the ads in Riko’s childrens book to her and she’s passed out

“Waka-chan, you don’t have to read the ads” “But she enjoys them.” 

...

Fair enough 

[giorno-plays-piano]

Money, Money, Money Part 1

Pairing: mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader, slight Peter Parker x Reader

Warnings: lots of swearing, silly drunk mobs, mentions of alcoholism, parody, Peter is adult, is this a crack fic??

Words: 2578.

Summary: When Steve finds out somebody has stolen their money, Bucky realizes he has to take his ass off the leather couch in his office, finally.

P.S. This is my first attempt to write humor and I’m sorry in advance for everything I’ve written here 😅

_________________

“BITCH, DID I STUTTER WHEN I SAID TO KEEP THAT SAFE CLOSED AT ALL TIMES?”

Allyson massaged her temples softly and let out a groan: if Mr. Rogers continued to yell like that, he would definitely choke soon. This morning he had been pretending to be the death, vengeance and fury, ready to kick the ass of her immediate superior, James Barnes, who acted like he was deaf, unable to pull himself from the couch where he slept after getting drunk as a fish last night. Oh, poor Bucky. Apparently, he fucked things up again if Mr. Rogers stormed into his office like he was getting chased by a 200-pound dog.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, you son of a...” glancing at a pouting man-child with a three-day beard, Steve covered his face with his palm and let out an exasperated sigh, “... respectable woman who would die of shame if she saw you now!”

“Come on, Stevie,” the man yawned, finally moving his huge, muscular body up to sit instead of just laying on the couch since he felt a little guilty Steve was getting all riled up while he just chilled, “why so serious? Yeah, somebody took a bit of cash from the safe, it’s not a big deal.”

Allyson heard everything as if they were speaking right in front of her - Bucky was a real Mr. Cheapo who didn’t want to rent an office with decent walls - and quickly closed her ears, wishing she had taken her earplugs today. Her boss just made a grave mistake, and now both of them were going to pay for it with their eardrums.

“NOT A BIG DEAL? NOT A BIG DEAL, YOU MASSIVE BAG OF DOUCHE?! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY WAS THERE, HUH?! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THOSE MONEY WERE FOR?!”

Seriously, she considered getting a new job, but these free daily standup shows were both tiring and so fucking funny she was afraid she might wet her seat.

“Oh my fucking God, Bucky, I swear I’ll kill you, I’ll... no, I have a better idea!” Steve gave his best friend a dirty look. “I’ll call your uncle. Yeah, you know which one. He’ll be sooo happy to take you drunk ass to jail and then give your mama a call. I bet she has a cure for both your attitude and alcoholism.”

“You wouldn’t do that!”

Suddenly realizing the danger he was in, Bucky quickly got up, almost falling to the floor but holding on the leather chair in the very last second. When Steve talked about calling his uncle, a chief of police of the neighboring town where his whole family lived, it meant things were going bad. Real bad.

“Bucky, it was the part we were going to invest into Pierce’s casino. I have to take it to him tomorrow morning. TOMORROW FUCKING MORNING, DO YOU HEAR ME, YOU STINKING DRUNK?”

“I’m drunk but not deaf, Steve!”

“Oh my God, I’m driving you to a rehab, go gather your stuff right now!”

Allyson sighed, getting up and proceeding to choose the most beautiful cup to fill it with fresh coffee: when their conflicts escalated to threats, it meant her boss would soon start to sweet-talk, apologizing to his best friend and promising to sober up and get things right. Every time she felt like Mr. Rogers would really do something to Bucky, the guy used his natural charisma and charm and got away with anything by just reminding Steve how he fought for his best friend in the dark alleys when Rogers was a sick, skinny kid. It worked every damn time.

There they were again, talking about same things with Bucky swearing on his mother’s life that he will find the money and bring it back to Steve. Usually it meant the threats were coming to an end, and soon Mr. Rogers would open the door and come out red as a lobster, breathing heavily as if he just ran a marathon. There he would see her with a cup of nice coffee with cream and two spoons of sugar just like he preferred, gladly accepting it and saying nobody understand him but her. Then Allyson would smile compassionately, listen to his small talk before he went out the office, and wait until her grumpy boss would fall out the room, reeking alcohol, and ask her what the fuck had happened yesterday.

After that in a couple of minutes things would finally settle down, and Allyson would have a chance to give a call to her best friend.

_______________________________

Your day couldn’t start better: you had finally received your Amazon order - hooray to the stupid makeup tools you would use, like, once a year - and even watched your favorite Netflix series with a cup of a fragrant coffee with marshmallows because it was Sunday and you were finally free from both work and cleaning the apartment. It felt so nice to just do absolutely nothing, laying on your couch with a piece of pizza in your hand. Seriously, even a workaholic like you had to do it more often.

Your lazy morning was interrupted by Peter, a sweet college student who was getting into troubles more often than a drunk in a local bar: you seriously considered calling him Harry Potter after you found him half-naked with a scratch on his forehead standing in the corridor of your building and holding a broom. To protect himself from bullies, he said, by the look on his face you could tell it was as good as a magic wand against 6"4 ft tall guys, seriously.

Since he rented an apartment with other unlucky nerds who had zero skills how to survive in this cruel world, you ended up nearly baby-sitting Peter, patching him up after he was getting in a fight and lending him some money time after time when he struggled to pay rent or buy food. His parents were elderly people with income below average, but they still did whatever they could to give him an education, so you decided to give the guy a hand.

Now that baby was standing in front of you, lit up like a Christmas tree, with a bouquet of wonderful pink roses, big box of hand-crafted chocolates and a whole bag of what looked like some very fine food, even a bottle of champagne clinking inside.

"Good morning, Fairy Godmother! I came to bring back what I owe you!" His smile was a mile wide when he looked at your face, happy to the point he couldn't stand still, dancing like those Duracell rabbits in the tv ad.

"You're up early, Cinderella."

You yawned, laughing when you saw the guy pouting at the nickname you gave him - tf he expected for calling you Fairy Godmother?

"Don't stand there, come in."

When he actually handed you the flowers and chocolates, giving you a quick peck on the cheek shyly, you froze, finally realizing he brought all this for you. Wait, what? Where the heck did he get so much money to buy that expensive stuff? You thought he was helping his other neighbor who was planning to finally propose to his girlfriend. Perplexed to the point you nearly missed that peck, you blinked at tomato red Peter.

"Please don't tell me you robbed your 90-year-old paralytic professor."

"Why don't you ask if I robbed a bank?" He pouted again, putting the bag on the floor and getting a hundred dollar banknote out of his old leather wallet. "I actually came to thank you for everything you've done for me. And I didn't rob anyone! I got a real job!"

"Real job?" You eyed him curiously. "But don't you already have a job in delivery?"

"Pfft, you can't call it a job. It was getting one nasty smelling pizza from one place to the other while looking miserable."

You barely held your laugh, leaving the bouquet and chocolates on the side table and rubbing guy's back. Poor Peter, nobody was giving him a hand - while you couldn't question people's decision since the guy wasn't the most reliable one, it was still a shame he wasn't treated decently as if all of them weren't young and careless once.

Wait, but who on Earth gave him such a well-paid job all of a sudden? He must have spent hundreds of dollars on the bouquet, chocolates, food and champagne, not even counting those 100 dollars he owed.

Oh God.

"Please don't tell me you're working for some shady business." You looked at him in horror, your hand flying to your mouth. "Peter, is it Tony's band?!"

"Jesus woman, why would I work for some stupid mob." The guy rolled his eyes, and you sighed in relief, not knowing what to except from this trouble on two skinny legs. “I’m telling you, it’s nothing bad! I just have to keep it a secret before I get a contract. Once I figure it out, I’ll explain everything, I swear!”

“Alright, alright, don’t stress over it, I’m not your Ma.” Smirking, you went to take a square glass vase you hadn’t use in ages, filling it with water to drop the bouquet inside. “Let’s celebrate it, then! Woah, careful there, give me that bottle until you drop it on my clean floor, I’ve been scrubbing it for hours yesterday!”

_______________________

Bucky still felt like Steve was making too much of a big deal out of it: obviously, it was Tony who went to him at night when Bucky was already drunk like a monkey, celebrating the birth of Clint’s daughter. Nobody else had the courage to steal from him, Steve’s right hand, an ex-soldier who had a reputation of a man killing with the first punch. Not that Bucky ever killed anybody, actually being a ex-trumpet in an army band...

Anyway, the man was heading over to Stark’s Tower, a motel where he and all his guys lived when his wife Pepper was out of town. Pepper had definitely been out of town lately since Tony didn’t call: when she was coming back, Steve and Tony were having a two-day truce with nobody getting in a fight because it was making Mrs. Stark upset, and when she was upset, both Steve and Tony didn’t risk getting out of their holes to face this enraged blonde woman who could make anyone wet themselves with one her glance. If there were anyone killing with just one punch in the town, it got to be Pepper.

As he got closer in his Cadillac that looked like it went through fire and water before being sold to Bucky, Barnes stared at the motel suspiciously: it was strangely quiet with everyone hiding inside, not a man guarding the motel’s entrance. What the hell happened? Tony loved showing off, pretending he ruled over the town, and he would definitely act like a king after stealing Steve’s and his money. It was unbelievable Bucky so nobody welcoming him with a smirk.

Hoping he didn’t use all that money for emptying a liquor store, Bucky parked the car and went to the motel, dying to have some beer: one heartless blonde boss of his emptied his fridge.

“Oh, more drinking partners returning to continue the fun, huh?”

Bucky froze immediately, staring at Pepper who stood in the doorway with a face of an iron maiden. Jesus fucking Christ. She returned to the city way before Tony told him, and it was clear she found him not in the condition she expected to. While Bucky considered whether it was better to run, Tony’s head appeared somewhere behind his wife, and Barnes saw Tony was as drunk as him, if not even more. He could see a huge blue mark from Pepper’s heavy hand on Stark’s cheek.

“Who’s that, honey?” The man asked innocently, earning an enraged glance from his wife, and Bucky thought he should have run. “Hi, Buck! Come on in, it’s ok if you didn’t bring beer even if I asked twice.”

Oh. Something was going on. Of course, Bucky could rat the man out immediately, telling Pepper he wasn’t drinking with Tony yesterday’s night, but he wasn’t such a heartless bastard - by the look on Stark’s face Barnes could see his sweet blonde wifey would beat poor Tony to death with her Dior handbag.

“Sorry, I blacked out for a couple of hours in my car.” He mumbled, bowing his head in respect. “Pepper, such a pleasure to see you.”

“Come on in, alcoholic.” Her gaze was heavy, and Bucky shivered a little, carefully leaving his shoes near the door and scurrying away to the coach where Tony sat, nervously biting his fingers. “Well, do you wanna tell me something, huh? How many hookers have you brought here yesterday?”

Glancing to Tony and back to Pepper, Barnes suddenly realized his frenemy had been so drunk he had no hecking idea whether somebody really brought hookers to the motel - it was a total taboo, but once they got drunk they could barely control themselves. Once they literally woke up to a Santa Claus singing Jingle Bells in the tub in the middle of June because Tony missed Christmas.

Of course, Stark would never slip up the night before Pepper was coming back to town, but, apparently, she didn’t stay with her mom for as long as she planned, and Tony was royally fucked.

“I’ve asked you a question.”

And now Bucky was, too, if he didn’t think of something quick. Of course, he could tell her the truth, but it meant losing Tony completely, and Barnes didn’t want that. A real mafioso should have at least one strong enemy, right?

“I’m sorry, Pepper, but I don’t think there were any hookers here last night.” He said, carefully choosing words. “You see, first, Tony never allows us to. Second, we’re good Christians. We would never invite some hookers when we celebrated the birth of Clint’s daughter!”

As he got silent, enjoying the effect his words were having on Pepper, Bucky looked at the man sitting to his right, watching Tony’s eyes watering: it was definitely God himself who sent Barnes his way that morning, saving his from near death. Nothing would work better than this excuse. Clint and all Bucky’s guys were so drunk to the point they barely remembered what had happened, and it would be easy to convince them Tony and his gang came to see Barnes for something and ended up staying with all of them.

Besides, there was a nice bonus Bucky could add to make it work even better.

“By the way, Clint named her Natasha. That’s also the name of your mom, right?”

By the look on Tony’s face the man realized he was ready to sing.

“How did he know my mom’s name?” Pepper eyed Steve’s right hand distrustfully, but he could tell she was less irritated.

“Oh, you know, he and his wife couldn’t choose the name, so we started saying whatever names we knew, and Tony mentioned Natasha.”

For a second Bucky thought Stark was going to kiss him through excess of joy.

When he finally left the motel, getting his pack of beer given him by lovely Pepper who changed the anger to mercy, Tony ran out of the house after him, giving him a pat on the shoulder and whispering quietly, “I own you one, brother.”

Bucky sighed. Stark didn’t take the money.

______________

Tags: @finleyjayne​​ @alexakeyloveloki​​ @helenaeisenhower​​ @villanellevi​​ @hurricanerin​​ @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @chris-evans-indian-fanfic​ @navegandoaciegas​ @rosalynshields​ @brattycherubwrites​ @sllooney​ @angrythingstarlight​ @lookiamtrying​ @buckysbunny​ @soleil-dor​ @stargazingfangirl18​ @dillybuggg​ @literate-lamb​ @cosicas-cuquis​ @sarge-barnes-sir​ @buckybarnesplumwhore​ @jaysayey​ @megzdoodle​ @gotnofucks​ @lux-ravenwolf​ @iheartsebandchris​ @ximebebx​ @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123​ @sourpatchspinster​

[i8jisoo]

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 ⇉  skz with pregnant!reader 

bangchan x reader | first part of dad!skz

↬ genre; fluff & a tinge of angst

↬ warnings; pregnancy, birth, talk of vomiting, and lots of cursin

↬ notes; fuck i love bangchan sm and im excited dis the first part of daddy!skz o whateva

from the moment he knew, he honestly was scared at first and just wanted to pretend like he wasn’t going to be a father

he needed time to evaluate it all, he was honestly confused and scared, he was nervous and doubtful of his parenting skills and providing eighteen years + many years after for his child

u were nervousssss as helllllllllllllll to tell him what was up

“well, i’m- y’know- baby?” you tried to get out, ur words were hella scrambled and he was confused before he came to the realization of what you meant 

silence which is vv concerning 

u knew this was a shot in the dark sorta, u two weren’t even public on the relationship let alone public about a pregnancy?

u guys ended up taking a break for about a month, really not knowing what to say to each-other

u two were afraid, which was normal, u just rly didn’t expect it from chan of all people to walk away from u

anybody else u could expect,, but this?? this was unlike him & u were more scared by that

he wound up at your place, box in hands

(u were kinda at ur breaking point bc u thought he was returning ur things)

(newsflash it was his stuff)

“i’m sorry, i just— being a father? being a parent, i don’t.. i don’t know anything about it, but nobody does when they become one. so, i’m gonna figure it out with you.”

going through the first sonograms w him & crying a lot while u two talked about the future

ur hormones r going to be the death of chan

u are 0-100 holy mooolyy

hes very careful with his choice of words and how he delivers them, not wanting to upset you

chans first present for the baby is a kangaroo, with a matching little joey 🥺

he also is surprisingly a very big fan of kanga from winnie the pooh, which he buys winnie the pooh stuff for the baby JSJSJSJSJJS just bc kanga & roo remind him of u n the baby 🥺🥺🥺🥺 (i rly need to stop)

u were a lil big, having a cute big bump to pair with ur pregnancy, the inevitable announcement was needed to happen if u were ever going to step outside again

chan rly didnt want to announce it bc he didnt know what peoples reactions would be :(

he knew he was only twenty-seven so some people might think it was a bit too early to have kids, but he thought it was perfect the way it was

u guys hid it until u couldn’t, sparking little rumors of ur pregnancy but u both decided not to confirm them

chan obsessing and literally worshipping you in your third trimester

u in his shirts? he was fuckin over

kisses and cuddling all the time, no matter how tired u were or he was, u two would either fall asleep while doing so or lay there for awhile before u were like

“ok i gotta pee, help me up!!”

no but frfr this baby was torturing u the last stretch of ur pregnancy

it seemed that anything u ate either made u throw up or gave u heartburn

ur stretchmarks were getting worse & it seemed like u were getting bigger everyday

u were very insecure the last months, just cause a lot of comments were talking about a bit of weight gain in ur face, which fuck,, u would never be hurt by some comments but with ur hormones and KNOWING u have put on weight, u rly didn’t feel the same

ofc chan knows whats up and hes there to tell u some r e a l s h i t

“okay, yes. you have put on weight, but you’re pregnant. that’s the good thing about it, you’re healthy okay? whether you had a small bump and no extra weight put on or a big bump and extra weight put on, you are carrying a baby. you can lose the weight when it’s over, right? you don’t need to feel this way, okay? i’m the only one who you should listen to about your appearance, i’m here to tell you the truth. you are beautiful. you are the morher of my child, that’s what you are. you’re not ugly, or fat, you’re not anything bullshit that people say to you.”

when u started crying, chan panicked

“nononononoono, don’t cry baby!”

his arms were wrapped around you so tightly, feeling your face pressed against his shoulder and your arms around his neck

“i love you.” u would be rly quiet and his heart would break at the sound but ur i love you, he just— it was so real and he’d never felt like this before

“love u too.” he’d say that shit so proudly and kiss the TOP OF UR HEAD SO SOFTLY 🥺🥺🥺

when u finally went into labor, u were like wow this hurts a F U CK TOO NNN

u woke up to the bedsheets soaked underneath u, pins n needles were all u could feel

u kinda sat there for ten minutes, scaring urself n making urself nervous when u started doubting yourself and feeling the pain become stronger

ur hands were s hh aa kkyy

u would tap chan so softly and feel a little frustrated he didnt wake up but like how tf was he supposed to feel that 😳

u kinda started crying now because u were STRESSED and him not waking up (no shit ur little tap wasnt gonna work but) it felt like he was gonna sleep forever

so ur hands pressed on chan’s shoulders, shaking them a little bit and letting out a,

“chris?” which ur voice was quiet as hell, shaky as hell, and wavering as you whispered to him

him opening his eyes to see your teary ones n hes just so sad that his heart drops 🥺

he never wakes up quicker though and hes sitting up fast as fuck

“what? what’s wrong?”

ur literally sobbing and hes freaked out by this because u have never cried like this

he kinda just wants to go back to bed since ur just crying but he knows smth is probably wrong because ur SOBBING so

“my water broke.”

now its his turn to be nervous cause fuck he is feeling so unprepared

he said fuck shoes on u, slipping u into his own clothes and helping u into the car so u two could go

did i forget to mention the hospital was an hour away 😳

he wants to pull over hearing u whine n grip his hand, noticing ur quietness and ur little mumbles everytime u rest ur head back after a contraction

he doesn’t give a fuck, he will carry u into the hospital and then put u in a wheelchair from the entrance so u don’t have to walk

u have a feeling maybe hes more nervous than u but atm ur fuckin close to losing it over the pain

u two are settled into a room, epidural done and just trying to make u comfortable now

u were seven centimeters which u still had to wait but u both knew u were close to meeting ur baby

when u are at ten centimeters though, chan is just a ball of tears and he’s just so proud of you

your hand was in his the whole time, chan’s lips near ur ear and he’s just whispering for u to concentrate on him and how much u wanna meet the baby

“i—i can’t do it!” 🥺🥺

you were honestly so drained and ur forehead was laced with sweat, ur hands sweaty and shaking in his own from being nervous and slowly becoming weaker as u put ur strength into pushing

“baby, you are probably what? three pushes, maybe you can cut it to one and a half. alright? you can do this baby, we’re so close to meeting our baby.”

that’s all u needed n chan knew it

surprise surprise,, chan was right about one and a half

“it’s a boy!!” which chan would press his lips to yours so quickly, u two crying and letting out watery laughs as your baby boy cried 🥺

he hasn’t felt this much pride and love since debut or releasing an album or tour, he couldn’t express how gifted he was to have deserved the gift of being a father

ofc they introduce you both to kangaroo care, chan so ready to take off his shirt and feel his baby boy’s skin against his own warm skin and he did so

then it was ur turn to hold him the same way, chan asking u if he could pull down ur gown so u could hold him like he did

that was the picture he needed, snapping it and getting you holding the baby against your naked (ofc ur gown was covering ur breasts) chest, your son sleeping soundly with his hands pressed against you

u two were parents now, u both had learned about pregnancy together and now u two were going to explore parenthood together

©️ maysdiors 2020 :: all rights reserved. do not repost my work on tumblr or other platforms.

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

Sorry you are feeling bad and hope you feel better soon. How are the kitties and the moving situation?

Thank you. In a few hours the nausea will be back to normal. Currently we're packing up the house, going one room at a time. It's about the only way to keep anxiety down. Though we use extra bedding and towels for packing if we can't fill a box right. Gotta give it some support so it doesn't go squish when something is on top.

The cats are all "BOXES!" They remind me of the sea gulls in Finding Nemo. They're gonna start stressing when the boxes really start to pile up and take over. Day of will be a beast! We close on the 30th, which is our moving deadline. Our plan is to lock them in one of the bedrooms while the truck is being loaded. Because we won't be able to sign the final papers until 5PM (seller's schedule or something), the movers will park the truck in front of the house. This will likely be around noon because the only way I could reserve the labor was loading in the morning, then they go work a different job while the truck is parked, and then come back later to unload.

Husband and I will be cleaning tf outta this house. It was filthy, had a gaping hole in a bathroom wall, and broken drawers in the kitchen. We're leaving this place better than we got it, and taking lots of pics. We want our deposit back. Our last place we left it so clean they only charged the minimum one hour cleaning. I shampooed tf outta the carpet. This time around? No carpet!!! Woot!!! We can have the place cleaned top to bottom inside three hours. There are handprints on some of the ceilings, left from the previous tenants.

I just realized I stopped typing for over 20 minutes. I'm on the app. This is my phone. It's just sitting in my hand and my stoned brain just goes away. I'm watching the Millionaire Matchmaker and laughing my ass off. I think if more folks watched this, they would figure out wtf is going wrong with their dating.

[tearsforhwa]

(HOW TF IS HE SO HOT UGH)

Guns n‘ Love

warnings:

-explicit language (cursing)

(please excuse any writing or spelling errors)

word count:

1340

Chapter 10

——————————————————————————

Hongjoong on the other side, was losing his mind once again. He had spent the last days searching for Seonghwa & Y/N, trying to get any information. But nothing seemed good enough. He was sad, angry, maybe even heartbroken. Hongjoong wasn't sure what if was, but something told him to search for her, get her back.

San had told him, to take a day off of work and free his mind from all the stress today. So here he was, walking through a shopping mall. Whenever he stopped at an shop, Hongjoong would keep on walking a second later, since nothing seemed to attract him.

As he took that one turn around a corner, a voice had caught his ear. He was looking around fastly, trying to spot the person whose voice it belonged to. As Hongjoong finally spotted them, his heart sank deeper than it had already been.

Seonghwa & Y/N were walking hand in hand, happily talking to each other. Seonghwa was already carrying some bags, as Y/N smiled widely at him.

Hongjoong's blood began to boil, wanting to rip Seonghwa's throat out right here. Secretly, he moved closer to them, following them around. Seonghwa bought her whatever she'd like to, even when she was complaining about the price, he didn't care. As they finally left the mal and entered an dark alley, Hongjoong took his chance.

„What the fuck are you doing?" He shout, which cause Seonghwa to abruptly stop and turn to look at him.

„What does it look like?" He hissed back at Hongjoong, who was already coming nearer, with no good intentions. Without any warnings, he swung his fist at Seonghwa, hitting his face.

Seonghwa himself, didn't wanted to do this in front of Y/N, trying to hold Hongjoong back from beating him. But as he grew more aggressively, even Seonghwa wasn't able to stay still. Both men were beating each other repeatedly, with no break.

„Hongjoong! Seonghwa! What the hell" Y/N shouted multiple times, trying to break them apart. Seonghwa shoved his phone into her hands, whispering something to her, before turning back to Hongjoong.

She did as he told her, and called Yeosang and Wooyoung. Both of them were there within 10 minutes, sprinting towards the fighting duo.

As soon as Yeosang & Wooyoung had broken both of them apart, Hongjoong was being fixated by Yeosang. Y/N didn't hesitate on searching Seonghwa's face for any bruises or scratches. By now, she didn't succeed in finding any injuries.

„Hongjoong what the fuck?" Y/N shouted at him, stepping away from Seonghwa. Hongjoong himself was struggling in Yeosang's arms, as he tried to wiggle himself out.

„The same I could ask you, why are you with him?" Hongjoong shouted back at her, almost making Yeosang trip from his wiggling.

„Because you've lied to me? Used me? Why the fuck would I stay with you, when he told me the truth? When he's the one who cares?" Those words left him speechless for a while. As Hongjoong was about to say something, San & Mingi appeared at one of the ends of the alley.

„Time to go" Seonghwa whispered into her ear, as he grabbed her hand and began to ran to the exit of the alley, followed closely by Yeosang & Wooyoung.

„We have the car parked over there!" Yeosang shout from behind them. Seonghwa took a quick turn, before jumping into the car with Y/N, closely followed by Wooyoung dropping on the passengers seat and Yeosang starting the car.

Before anyone could reach their car, Yeosang set a high speed, desperately trying to get out of there. Not short after, a black Benz appeared behind them, catching on quickly.

„They're after us!" WooYoung shout at Yeosang who was almost flying across the street.

„I see that, I'm not blind!" He shout back at Wooyoung who pulled his seat belt closer to his body. Yeosang looked at the back mirror, making eye contact with Seonghwa & Y/N.

„Hold on tight, I have to race them off" He spoke to them, at which Seonghwa nodded and swung one arm in front of her. Y/N was visibly panicked, not just because of this ride, also because of the incident with Hongjoong. She didn't expect to ever meet him again like this, not at all.

Seonghwa must've noticed that, because he smiled at her sweetly trying to calm her nerves a bit. Yeosang in the meanwhile raced through the streets of Seoul with Hongjoong up their ass behind them.

„Time to pull out the secret route" He smirked as he suddenly hit the breaks, and turned the car around while drifting. Hongjoong was caught off guard, unable to spot them in the traffic.

Yeosang waited until Hongjoong passed them, before driving through an dark alley, onto the highway again.

„They're gone" WooYoung exclaimed, patting Yeosang's shoulder proudly. Yeosang smirked while still driving at an controlled high speed.

„They're gone, calm down" Seonghwa spoke to Y/N softly, as she was breathing heavily. He took one of her hands into his stroking it, making her relax a bit.

As they arrived back at their base, Yeosang parked the jeep in their Garage and Seonghwa helped her out of her seat.

„Go to our room and rest, love. I'll be there soon, okay?" Seonghwa spoke to her as he pressed a light kiss to her forehead. Y/N nodded at him, stumbling to their quarters.

„That was close" WooYoung spoke up after she had left. Seonghwa sighed again, visibly annoyed.

„How could he find us? Was it coincidence or planned?" Seonghwa quietly spoke to the other two men. Yeosang crossed his arms in front of his chest.

„It could be anything. We should have someone up their ass from now on" All of them agreed to Yeosang's idea, sending Changbin and Chan to watch every step they're taking.

-

Y/N was still not over what had happened. Her heart was racing and she began to shake lightly. She decided to change her clothes into some more comfortable, before she laid back down on the bed. Before any more thoughts could fill her head, the door opened and Seonghwa stepped inside.

„How do you feel?" He asked her carefully, as he closed the door behind himself. Y/N's eyes told enough. Seonghwa quickly changed and laid down next to her, wrapping his arms around her waist. He started to press light kisses to the back of her neck, calming the storm inside of her.

Suddenly, Y/N turned around and positioned herself on top of him, burying her head into his neck. Seonghwa was caught off guard by her action, but proceeded to wrap his arms back around her waist.

With one hand he began to stroke her hair, playing with single strands her and there.

„We don't know how he could find us" He whispered to her carefully, pressing another kiss to her head.

„He had to know where we are, might as well have someone up our ass" Y/N whispered into his neck, before Seonghwa felt tears stream down her face. He pulled her away, to face her.

„Why are we crying, darling?" He almost whispered so softly, it made her heart melt. Seonghwa used his thumps to wipe her tears away, stroking her cheeks gently after.

„I've never seen him like that, nor you" Her voice was being heard, as it slightly broke off at the end. Seonghwa chuckled to himself at the sudden innocent in her voice.

„Love, that's the business. You don't come very far here if your all gentle and nice, sometimes you have to punish your opponents. Might as well kill them sometimes" He spoke to her softly, as her sobs became less heavy.

Seonghwa could clearly see how many thoughts were running through your head right now. He was afraid his plan might fail, he had to get your mind off of things. An unholy idea popped up in his mind, making him smirk devilish.

to be continued...

[hankwritten]

Immaterial Witness

Demoman/Soldier, 5k

Request for r2mich2, Ghosthunting

Demo was less than thrilled about being selected for mandatory company ghost-busting work. His enthusiasm dropped even lower when he saw who’d be accompanying him.

“You!” he exclaimed.

“You!” Soldier replied. “Except with a different inflection! To indicate I am also not happy to see you!”

“Bloody hell,” Demo groaned as the looked at the man before him. “Jesus of all the BLU’s she could have picked for a ‘cross team eradication venture’, and she went with you.”

“I didn’t agree to this either, maggot,” Soldier assured him. “I am under orders not to strangle any REDs until this mission is complete, but my tractability will be put to the test if said RED is such a weakling and liar.”

“For the last time, I never called you a-”

“And what about all the things you did say, you son of a bitch?”

Demo scowled, not looking forward to going through the same recycled arguments over again. She had some nerve putting the two of them together after what she’d put them through; complete and total destruction of a friendship, and for what? Just to decide TF Industries was going to be managing both teams a few months later? It was a load of crap if Demo ever heard it.

“What are you even wearing?” he scoffed at Soldier’s new uniform.

“This is regulation specter pummeling gear, you sissified maggot scum!” Soldier puffed up proudly. Gone was the red jacket and fatigues, instead superseded by a singular beige jumpsuit.

“And what’s that?” Demo pointed to the canister vacuum strapped to his back. No bells, no whistles, just a regular old vacuum with a flexible nozzle.

“Ghost sucker,” Soldier said plainly.

“Right. Obviously.”

“Well what did you bring RED?” Soldier accused. “These ghosts are going lift you up by your frilly little underthings and fling you right out the door if you do not have anything to protect yourself from their disembodied maliciousness!”

“I,” Demo said, flexing his fist, “have this.”

Engineer had built it with such efficiency, Demo was sure he’d made the blueprints years ago and was just waiting for someone to ask for a ghost-capturing device. The device’s visual design was similar to that of the gunslinger, but instead of a limb replacement, it functioned more like power armor, cradling the outside of the wearer’s hand and increasing their grip tenfold.

“This ‘lil beauty has everything,” Demo continued haughtily. “EKG readings, built in spooktralizer, and-” He pulled back his fingers, activating the now-glowing disk in the center of his palm. “Anti-gravity net. No spirit’s going to escape this vortex, which is a good thing because you can’t suck up a ghost with a vacuum cleaner.”

“Shows how much you know, buster,” Soldier said. “All those doodads won’t do jack when you are staring into the blood-red eyes of a flesh-hungry phantom—these are creatures of the other side! Of the great beyond! They do not care about technology.”

“Oh aye?” Despite himself, Demo got right into Soldier’s face. “We’ll se about that when my power glove’s saving your sorry arse from having spectral boot shoved up it.”

“I will take that bet, princess,” Soldier spat back.

“Uuhhhhhhhhhhgggggggggg,” a new voice cut into the conversation. “If I have to sit through another one of your lover’s spats I’m going to kill myself. Again.”

Soldier’s eyes narrowed, fixating on something over Demo’s shoulder. “Oh great. The sword is here.”

“Yes! The sword is here!” the Eyelander chirped sarcastically. “And since I’m bloody gracing you with my company, you can do me a favor and get on with this thing. We’ve been standing out here for ten minutes.”

“It’s right,” Demo admitted as Soldier continued to stare daggers at the weapon strapped to his back. “Let’s head in.”

Demo didn’t wait to see if Soldier followed him as he took his first creaking step onto the house’s porch; by company orders, they were stuck together for now, no matter how much bad blood ran between them.

“So why are we clearing this place of ghosts anyway?” Eyelander asked as Demo pushed in the front door. The doubles groaned with an appropriate level of eeriness.

“The Voice’s orders,” he shrugged. “She wants this for a new battleground, but she wants it ghost free. Apparently there’ve been too many complaints about the past few Halloweens for her liking.”

“Really?” Eyelander said aghast. “Who doesn’t like Halloween?”

“Eh. Some of the mercs think it’s too random. Chaotic, hard to focus on what’s going on. They don’t like all the candy packs and the fact that idiot in a robe shows up and turns a ten minute match into a thirty minute nightmare.” At the last, he eyed Soldier over his shoulder.

“Do not look at me!” Soldier barked. “That isn’t my fault!”

“Yes it is! Last time he even said ‘SOLDIER THIS IS YOUR FAULT!’ as he was dropping bombs on our heads!”

“Well I am not the only causer-of-halloween-related-problems in this company,” Soldier said, jogging to get ahead of Demo to block his path. “The giant floating eyeball with red wig and child-sized overalls certainly wasn’t mine.”

Demo rubbed his face. “Jesus, just forget it. The only reason we have to tolerate each other is because there’s some soul with soon-to-be-finished business lurking around here, and we picked the short straw. So let’s find whatever apparition, spirit, or poltergeist is squatting in this dump and get out of each other’s hair.”

About to offer some stupid retort, Soldier was abruptly cut off as Eyelander yelped, “w-wait! Poltergeists?? You didn’t say anything about those arseholes!”

Demo and Soldier exchanged a look.

Soldier leveled a frown at the Eyelander. “You are a ghost, maggot. How on God’s green earth are you afraid of ghosts?”

“I’m afraid of poltergeists, eejit,” Eyelander snapped back. “You don’t bloody mess with a geist unless you want your immortal soul turned to shreds and left to wander the infinite abyss forever.”

“Whatever, this is getting us nowhere.” Demo pushed past Soldier. “C’mon. We’ve got a job to do.”

As he passed under the precarious looking chandelier overseeing the foyer, Soldier murmured, “tch. Only ever got the job. Typical.” Demo pretended he hadn’t heard.

What he did hear—over the sounds of the Eyelander whining about powerful forces they didn’t understand and eventually sinking into resigned grumble—was the sound of an organ playing in the deep bowels of the manor.

“Thirty bucks says there’s no one playing it when we get there,” Demo said.

“Deal,” Eyelander replied.

They readied their weapons. Well, not exactly weapons (and definitely not weapons in Soldier’s case, as he strangled his vacuum’s hose in a viselike grip), but tools that would get this bloody ghost out of here and let Demo go home for the day. His footsteps scraped decades old rugs as he padded carefully across the ground, power glove extended into the gloom before him. No readings yet, save for Eyelander’s steady thrum, but as soon as they crossed the barrier of the music room the EKG jumped like crazy.

“Called it,” Demo said as the organ continued to press down one ivory key after another, despite the only human beings in the room being the two mercs who had just entered. “Pay up, Eyelander.”

“Sure! Let me just grab my wallet.”

“Smart-arse.”

“It’s called a pommel.”

“If you two ladies are finished,” Soldier growled, drawing closer to the haunted piano, “let’s bag this ghost-maggot.”

Demo rolled his eye, sweeping to the other side of the organ that’s girth took up the entirety of the room, pipes clawing at the ceiling as wax burned down to nubs around it. “You ‘n your cleaning supplies just stand back.”

“And let you fumble our ticket out of here? I don’t think so.” Soldier flipped on his Hoover.

The glove began to gyrate in Demo’s palm. “You’re the one who’s messing this up! If you’d just believe me when I tell you something-”

“How can I believe you when your history of treachery continues?”

They were nearing the organ now, the disk glowing a menacing red and the vacuum jumping like it was trying to escape Soldier’s hands. The music doubled its tempo, growing more erratic with every step the pair took toward its console.

“There is no history,” Demo spat. “I didn’t do it in the first place!”

“But you still took the contract!”

“Because you did first!”

There wasn’t so much music now as random mashing of keys, a pained wailing accompanying the stressed notes in an unholy shriek. A bolt of electricity shot from the glove collided with something on the piano seat, revealing a ghastly form in the middle of the two men.

“Maybe I would have gone back on it!” Soldier roared as he struggled to maintain control of the hose, writhing in his hands like a viper. “If you’d talked to me I would have known it wasn’t-”

“THAT SHOULDN’T BE MY RESPONSIBILITY.”

“WELL IT HAS TO BE SOMEBODY’S.”

As Soldier screamed his final words, the ghost between them joined in the crescendo. The two forces on either of its sides pulled and pulled at its edges, wind howling and light flashing until-

Demo and Soldier were thrown into opposite walls with a resounding crack.

Grimacing, Demo pushed himself up, rubbing away the white spots in his vision that their techno-vortex had left him with. When things were mostly clear, he blinked at the organ seat, finding no trace of the specter the power glove had briefly outlined.

“Did we get it?” Soldier asked, likewise suppressing aches as he got to his feet.

“Dunno.” Demo tapped a few buttons on his glove. “Well there’s only one reading now. Maybe we fried it?”

“Bag isn’t full,” Soldier noted, poking the vacuum. “Must’ve.”

“Hm. I suppose that was climactic enough. I’m fine with leaving if you are.”

“There’s nothing I want more,” Soldier said, already halfway to the door.

“Feeling’s mutual,” Demo grumbled, following him out. “Went down pretty easy, all things considered. Barely a quarter of ‘ole Merasmus’s hit points. Can’t believe Eyelander was scared of that.”

The Eyelander said nothing.

Demo stopped walking. “You alright, mate?” he asked over his shoulder to where Eyelander was sheathed.

Still, it didn’t respond. He pulled it out, a soft sssth in the now quiet music room, and held it in front of him. He was about to ask it again, when Eyelander finally blurted, “oh uh! Right, me. I’m fine, just peachy, how are you?”

Soldier paused, and turned on his heel. “RED. Why doesn’t your sword have a stupid accent anymore?”

“Uh, crap uh,” the sword sputtered. “Blimey is what I meant to say governor! Pip pip bob’s your uncle and all that!”

“You!” Demo said, squeezing the imposter ghost for all it was worth, to which it gave a tiny eep! “What have you done with Eyelander?”

“Look, this doesn’t have to be a problem right?” the geist said. “I can still be a haunted sword! And do whatever it is the old ghost did, but please don’t make me get out. I’ve been trapped in that organ for fifty years! I want to go, see the world, oh please oh please take me with you?”

“Maybe we let it,” Soldier snorted. “Can’t be any more annoying than the old one.”

“That’s not funny,” Demo snapped, then turned his singular glare to the sword. “Listen here you useless lump of ectoplasm, you tell me what you did with my friend or I’m going to turn your soul into sizzling anti-matter.”

“No!”

And to Demo’s shock, the sword went flying from his hands, shooting up into the room’s ceiling.

“No, I won’t go back!” Encased in an orange glow, the sword maneuvered under its own power, spinning wildly until it had become an airborne lawnmower blade. “Screw you guys!”

“Shite!” Demo said as he charged out after it as it went shooting into the hall.

He followed it all the way to the foyer again, sprinting around each corner just to keep it in sight, but when he arrived out of breath at the grand staircases he had to admit there was no catching it.

“Shite,” he repeated.

“What in the goddamn hell was that about?” Soldier had, of course, followed him back to the entrance. “Now we’re stuck here until we find it again. Couldn’t have withheld your groveling freak out for one damn second.”

“I wasn’t just going to let it steal Eyelander’s sword!” Demo retaliated.

“You and the fucking Eyelander,” Solder swore, helmet wobbling as a snarl curled on his features. “Always with the Eyelander. You care more about that sword than you do anyone else, and you always fucking pick it in the end.”

They were in each other’s faces once more, nose to nose as the manor creaked around them. Demo glared, and softly replied, “well maybe the sword is better company.”

That might have been the end of it any other time, but they were too close now, too entwined, and Soldier grabbed the front of Demo’s shirt. “…God damn you,” he muttered. His face rippled with something unrecognizable. “That’s what I mean. Maybe that wasn’t you in the video, but when you took that contract you started saying crap like that.”

A hard knot found itself in Demo’s throat. He ignored the beeping coming from his glove. “After hearing ‘I never liked you’ enough times, it’s hard not to believe it.”

“…We ever going to stop lying to each other?”

Demo pulled the hand from the front of his shirt. The beeping was growing incessantly loud but he blocked it out, only focusing on stamping away from the Soldier-

And not noticing when the chandelier above him gave an ominous jolt.

His head whipped up too late when the chain broke, the glove practically screaming as he froze in panic for split second-

The cacophany when the chandelier came down was earsplitting, hundreds of glass teardrops shattering on the marble floor below, crashing into each other as their frame became nothing more than a bent pile of metal. Demo wheezed, having been thrown into a solid surface for the second time in less then ten minutes, and his brain caught up enough to realize he wasn’t dead.

The Soldier, having tackled Demo to bring him out of the worse of the poltergeist’s attack, had taken the brunt of it. He winced, rolling onto the hip that didn’t have any glass stuck in it.

“Christ,” Demo hissed, staring at the broken fixture. “It really is trying to kill us now, isn’t it?”

“You threatened to atomize its soul,” Soldier grunted. “Can’t blame it.”

Demo’s eye reaffixed to the bleeding BLU, tongue catching on the question. “You-” But what was he even supposed to say?

Soldier avoided his gaze. “Shut it, maggot. This was merely a rescue based on contempt and rivalry—no one’s allowed to kill you but me, yadda yadda, you get the picture.”

“Soldier…”

Years of bitter hatred choked down whatever else he would have said, but they couldn’t stop the swell of concern as he watched blood bloom on Soldier’s jumpsuit.

“Here,” he said, getting to his knees and picking his way through the broken glass. “Let’s get you up.”

Soldier glared in suspicion. Their argument still hung hot, bar of iron glowing yet unforged, not sure what shape it was suppose to take. But the blood was moving steadily down Soldier’s leg, and with distaste he resigned himself to being lifted under one arm.

“I can do it myself, maggot,” Soldier said once Demo had helped him to the stairs and tried to push up his pant leg.

Demo stared at him for a moment, hand holding the bandage he’d torn from the jumpsuit’s opposite leg, eye unargumentative as he gazed at the Soldier. A few more seconds of reproach ticked by, but then Soldier sighed in resignation, glancing away as Demo tied up his leg.

When it was over, he wasted no time getting to his feet, refusing Demo’s arm this time. “Definitely can’t let that thing run wild now,” he said. “Get your stupid glove to tell us where it is.”

There was an obvious limp to his walk, but Demo knew he had survived worse. That Demo had put him through worse.

The Demoman tapped his wrist a few times and said, “this way.”

The second floor was just rows and rows of suits of armor. All of them identical, all of them leaning down menacingly as the mercenaries passed beneath, listening to the spooktralizer’s pulse become a steady companion. There was constant draft, a thrumming chill up Demo’s spine, and he tried to remind himself that ghosts had the power to get inside your head and trigger your fear response. The fact that the haunt had turned murderous was nothing to be worried about—that he was, in all reality, afraid of no ghost.

The nearest suit of armor vibrated, and he jumped three feet in the air.

So did Soldier, bristling like a cat and demanding, “show yourself Casper! I am not afraid of your pathetic saber rattling!”

In response, every suit in the hall lifted it arms.

Soldier yelped, and he and Demo found themselves back to back, their respective ghost hunting equipment bared in front of them. But they were surrounded, the suits jerking to life and taking their first halting steps off their pedestals, clanking stiffly at the two mercenaries. They were forced backwards, one step, then two, until suddenly Demo found himself on the ground, the creeping terror that he’d been repressing now roaring overpoweringly. It was just a mind trick, just a manipulation, but knowing that and being able to act were vastly different things—and as the ancient warriors drew closer, he reached out and clung desperately to the closest thing he could find.

Clang went the greaves in front of him, coming to a stop as the full-body rattle started again. Shaking and shaking and Demo didn’t look, burying his face in Soldier’s shoulder-

“Ayyyiiieeeeeee,” a voice screamed as something small and spectral went spinning out of the armor.

After several seconds of silence from the suits around them, Demo finally lifted his head. All the armor had gone stiff and immobile, and the only clue to their previous animation was the ghostly impression of a sword floating a few feet off the ground.

“Eyelander?” he blinked.

“Uhhhg…my rain gaurd…” the Eyelander’s apparition groaned. “What…urhg…what happened? …….And why are you two cuddling?”

Demo looked down to find Soldier was clinging to him just as tightly as Demo was to he. Soldier realized it at the same time, and immediately pushed Demo off him, saying, “I did not give you permission to use me for comfort and safety, maggot!”

“Oi! You were the one who started it!” Demo turned his attention to the Eyelander. “What the bloody hell was that about? You trying to make us crap our pants?”

“Urhg, I don’t know!” Eyelander snapped. “If I’m not concentrating on anything in particular I just end up doing ghost type things. Like how you just start making horse noises when you think you’re home alone.”

Soldier snickered. Demo shot him a glare.

Ignoring him, Soldier got to his feet and dusted himself off. “That’s one thing to check off the list.” He paused, inspecting the form floating before him. “…Why are you a sword?”

“…I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Wait, no, Soldier’s right,” Demo said, getting up as well. “You’re not in the blade anymore, you can look like anything you want! You used to be a mortal, didn’t you?”

“I don’t remember okay?” it snapped. “That was centuries ago, I don’t know how to be anything but a ghost sword.”

“Aw, give it a shot mate,” Demo encouraged. “If we’re going to hunting around for the geist that stole your sword, you might as well try a new form.”

“…Alright, I guess I can give it a try.”

Slowly, the illusion in front of them melted, growing until it was humanoid, then rippling as details began to make its shape. The jaw strengthen, and a hole appeared in the right side its face, features sharpening until a near-copy of the Demoman stood next to the suit of armor. It was a hazy reflection, as though looking at himself in green glass, but a reflection just the same.

“Hey, don’t be me,” Demo said.

“Yeah, we already got enough of those,” Soldier added under his breath.

“Uhg,” it complained. “Sorry. You’re the most recent person I’ve been.” The uncanny valley was further emphasized that Eyelander forgot to move Demo’s mouth when it was speaking.

“Just be yourself,” Demo insisted, as much due to the ghost-him’s creepiness as the fact that he was a bit curious about who Eyelander used to be. “Go on, give it a shot.”

Grumbling without moving its mouth, the Eyelander began to change again, Demo’s features swept away as though lost on the wind. It grew inexorably, towering of the mortals below it like a warrior from myth; then it shrank, arms and ghostly blade disproportionately detailed like recalling a fighting feeling.

Both of these faded, other particulars bubbling up from the surface. A tartan hood crawled over the general shape of a head, plunging the face into inscrutability. From its shoulders sprung a cape, one that would have pooled across the ground if the mirage weren’t floating a half-foot off the stone. A thick tunic billowed, then fell down to the mirage’s knees, held in place by a sash across its chest.

The face beneath flickered. Morphing, becoming-

“Damn it,” Eyelander groaned as the features fell back into darkness, effort weakening its voice. “I really don’t remember.”

“Ach, it’s fine Eyelander,” he assured it, hearing the clear disappointment. “We’ll get your sword back in no time.”

“…Thanks mate.”

Suddenly, Soldier pushed past him, far roughing than necessary. “If the ghost is done having an identity crisis, lets get back to busting.”

Demo frowned after him, but according to the readings he was headed in the right direction, so he said nothing to it.

Eyelander was a different story. “OoooOOOoooo, jealous again are we?” Catching up to him was no problem when it could simply glide across the ground, cape fluttering behind it.

“Silence apparition!” Soldier stated. “You cannot get inside my head with your devil words, nor your OoooOOOoooo.”

Eyelander cackled, floating in front of him and forcing him to walk into it. He shivered as he passed through the ethereal dregs, breaking from his path and pivoting into the nearest set of doors. They found themselves in the grand library, tiers upon tiers of floor-to-ceiling books simply rotting in the dust. Cobwebs clung to everything, ancient lamps and moldering fainting couches, rendering the entire room silent.

“Touch a nerve?” Eyelander was enjoying its new ‘body’, swinging a spectral arm over Soldier’s shoulder that he was unable to shrug off. “Not still mad he likes me better than you?”

“Only goes to show how poor his taste is,” Soldier snapped.

Demo had to jog to catch up. The library’s various stone busts turned to watch him as he moved.

“Maybe, if he was hanging out with you to begin with,” Eyelander persisted. “Does that bother you, yankee doodle?”

“Eyelander, lay off him,” Demo said, surprising even himself when the words came out of his mouth. Soldier didn’t look, breathing heavily through his nose

“Why?” the ghost huffed. It was odd seeing the body language to accompany it for once, the entity folding its arms across its chest. “He’s the one who throws a fit whenever I’m around, and I’m bloody sick of it. Why should I have to put up with some moron you don’t want anything to do with?”

“Shut your nonexistent mouth!” Soldier was really heated now. “If you keep talking to me I will put my boot up so far up your ass you will feel it in the afterlife!”

“OoooOOOoooo,” Eyelander said, and it was a proper ghostly ooo that reverberated about the empty library. “I’m so scared. Should I start crying out in fear? That’s all a lout like you knows how to do, just yell until someone cries and then piss off entirely. Well guess what, eejit, he’s just fine without you.”

“I am warning you…” Soldier growled.

“Oh but that doesn’t stop you from getting all possessive does it?” Eyelander just goaded, heedless of anything else but its own petty revenge. “More possessive than me, and I’m the one possessing him! Is that the sort of bond you’re going for yank? Spending a lot of time in-”

With a furious scream, Soldier launched himself at the Eyelander. On instinct, it jerked to the side to try and avoid his murderous hands, but it didn’t matter either way as Soldier when flying through the ghost’s form and crashed into the bookcase behind it.

The bookcase swung like a revolving door, and Soldier disappeared from view.

Eyelander and Demo shared a glance. “Did that just…?” he asked.

“Hold on.” It glided forward, passing through the bookcase unimpeded. A moment later, it stuck its head back out through the wall and said, “aye! It’s a secret passage! Some stairs going down into a basement of some sort.”

“Stairs? Is Solder alright?” Demo worried as he came forward and tried to trigger whatever had moved the loose shelf.

The Eyelander stuck its head in, then back out again. “Eh, I’m sure he’s fine.”

Demo found him, if not exactly fine, then stabilized. His leg had started bleeding again, but the tumble down the basement stairs had shaken the fight out of him. He let Demo rebandage his injuries with barely a word.

“Good work finding the passage, lad,” Demo said, as though he didn’t feel a terrible heat of embarrassment on the back of his neck. “Based on the readings, that’s where the ghost is hiding.”

“Hm,” was all Soldier said. He wouldn’t look at either Demo or the levitating knight.

“…Eyelander, why don’t you float on ahead?” Demo said after a moment. “Scout things out a bit for us?”

“Yeah, sure. Not being bound to a mortal vessel anymore gives you a lot more free range of movement.”

Demo helped Soldier to his feet. Several long minutes were spent walking down a cold, damp tunnel, only illuminated by bulbs covered in metal grates that flickered in sync. When Eyelander had drifted far enough ahead in its impatience, Demo asked what had been on his mind since they’d come down here, spinning over as the guilt he’d been holding back for years weighed heavier on him than it ever had.

“…Jane?” he mumbled. The Soldier jumped at his real name. “What Eyelander said back there…have I really been…?”

“Don’t believe anything that comes out of that ghost’s pie hole! Its ghost pie hole! Where it puts its ghost pies!” Soldier barked hastily. “It is- I don’t-!”

Demo let Soldier sputter for a moment before frowning at the floor. “I’m sorry.”

Soldier choked mid denial and whipped his head so hard his eyes showed wild underneath the helmet. “You- What?”

“You were right,” Demo rubbed his face. “About always lying to each other. Saying we didn’t care, just to make it easier. And you’re right that I treat my friends like crap sometimes, picking the sword—the job—over anybody else. So I fucked up too, believing their lies just as much, listening to them because it was the easiest.” He lifted his head, making eye contact with the alarmed Soldier. “So maybe I do pick the sword sometimes. But I never should have taken a bribe over my best friend.”

They’d stopped walking, Soldier just staring at him, mouth slightly open.

Soldier breathed in deep. “…Your best friend?”

Cautiously, taking care not to startle Soldier or his own frayed nerves, Demo reached out and held Soldier’s hand. He could hear Soldier’s labored breaths, even as the BLU looked down so steeply at their linked hands that his helmet obscured is whole face.

“Aye.”

Soldier’s mouth writhed a second longer before saying, “I’m sorry. Too. For all the crap I said to you after. I didn’t mean any of it either, I always liked you. I always…”

Demo squeezed his hand. “We’ll talk after we get my sword back, aye?”

Soldier finally lifted his chin, a grin of joyous relief across it. “Affirmative! We will beat the crap out of that weapon-stealing cheat, and then boot it back to kingdom come.”

“Our powers combined, eh?” Demo wiggled the fingers on the power glove.

Soldier lifted his hose. “Lets get this spirit-maggot!”

“Are you two coming?” the Eyelander demanded, reappearing in the grimy tunnel before them. “There’s this big evil laboratory at the end of the hall and the bell-end body-snatcher is just waiting for someone to come and kick its pommel.”

Demo grinned at his once-again best mate. “Don’t worry Eyelander, that bastard’s got another thing coming.”

The rescue squad stormed into the evil lab, magic and science and supernatural forces in hand. The room was exactly what you’d think: test tubes full of pulsating green goo, an open slab with leather straps around it, giant Tesla coils pointing all which way as though the whole space was ready to zap you at a moment’s notice.

“You!” Eyelander demanding, pointing a menacing spectral finger at the sword floating in the center of the room.

“Aw crap,” it said as it turned and saw the trio of ghostbusters that had come for its soul.

Immediately, it tried to make a run for it, zipping off on a trail of orange magic. But Soldier was faster, flipping the Hoover to ‘suck’ and immediately summoning a typhoon from the nozzle’s end. The geist shrieked as it was pulled backwards, forward momentum fighting against the suction until was it pulled taught mid-air. Demo wasn’t going to inadvertently help it this time, though. Instead, he stood shoulder to shoulder with his best mate, and sent a pulse of magnetic energy to join the vacuum’s pull.

“NOOOOOooooo,” the geist screamed as it began to lose ground.

It still wasn’t enough. A humanoid shape was being drawn from the sword, but that only made it struggle harder, fighting tooth and nail as it screamed all the while.

The Eyelander’s spirit stormed forward. With both hands it gripped the sword, pulling away from its rival ghost with its impressive incorporeal biceps. The geist screamed harder, but in a three-on-one it was losing, even as it tried to wrench the hilt away. Eyelander grabbed above the crossguard, and a gush of ethereal blood splattered on the floor, but the extra leverage worked, and it ripped the blade free from enemy hands.

Eyelander reared back, and the ghost went falling into the vacuum with a scream.

The impact knocked Demo flat on his ass. It wasn’t as rough as the first explosion, but he still groaned as he sat up. “We get it this time?”

Soldier poked the bag, which moaned in protest. “Yup. We got it.”

“How about you Eyelander?” Demo got up and walked to where the sword had fallen. “Everything back in the bits?”

“Uhrg…my whole fuller hurts,” the blade on the floor said in what was definitely the Eyelander’s voice. “Put me back in my scabbard…I want a nap.”

Demo chuckled, and did as he was asked.

“Teamwork saves the day!” Soldier declared, walking up to the pair. “Goes to show what camaraderie and true American sprit can do.” He clapped Demo on the shoulder, and the two exchanged a smile.

“…Did I miss something?” Eyelander asked from its sling on Demo’s back.

“Nah,” Demo said. “Jane ‘n I just worked some things out. Don’t worry your pretty little locket about it.”

“We are best friends again!” Soldier was too excited to hold back. He grabbed Demo’s hand again and squeezed.

The two shared a look of shining eyes and full hearts.

“Yuck,” Eyelander noted. “Do I have to be here for this?”

“Ah, shut it,” Demo said. “We just saved your life.”

“I didn’t want to be brought along in the first place!”

“You hate being left alone at the base,” Demo pointed out.

“Yeah but that was before you brought ghosthunting into the picture. You should have known better! What if one of your stupid machines had malfunctioned and killed me instead?”

As they walked back up through the secret passage, Soldier leaned toward the scabbard and said, “looks like there’s trouble in paradise after all, huh.” Demo had never heard him be smugger.

“Keep grinning, eejit,” Eyelander grumbled. “Next time we get into battle I’m carving a new smile into your throat.”

Soldier snickered, and they left the manor victorious.

[thesolotomyhan]

Narcos México: Dating Them Would Include: (1/7)

Alright,,, so I gave in and I just said fuck it. I was feeling bold when I decided to to upload this because I have so much doubt about this😅. This is my first time ever writing. I hope you enjoy it nonetheless! I started off my with tontín and if all goes well, I’ll start writing the rest! :)

BTW: I’m sorry I couldn’t add a keep reading link, I’m using the mobile app as of right now because I’m in the process of getting a new laptop!

Warnings: NSFW! 

Amado:

Let’s start with El Señor De Los Cielos,

Amado is always one to flex, ever since your first date, it was his priority to end the date with you wanting more of him and leaving the impression that no one will treat you as good as he will

And although he did succeed in his goals, he was the one counting down the minutes until your next date, you had him in the nubes, girl

I shit you not, he went to buy you an engagement ring after your first date because he just knows that you’re the one he’s gonna marry and have kids with- I’m sobbing

So it obviously doesn’t take long for you guys to be official

He loves taking you out for dinner

You cannot convince me otherwise that he would not go all out for y’all’s personal dates, like roses everywhere, with mood lighting and a pinche serenata,,, like cmon, you make him SOFT

He would not do this for anyone other than YOU

If you wanted to go on a date or just go somewhere, he’s already dragging you along to one of his planes

Acosta probably roasts Amado so much but he does not care, not when you have him wrapped tightly around your finger

When he’s away on Juarez business, he’s calling you every night, just to hear your voice

Ugggh, you let him rant about the stupid shit everyone did that day because you just know your Amado is tired and needs someone to listen

When he comes back from business, he always brings you something just to see you smile

He gives you the softest kisses! Forehead kisses are a must

Ugggh,, I also see him stargazing with you, like you’re in between his legs with his arms wrapped around you and there’s times where he has Chalino Sanchez going on in the background

When Miguel throws any type of party or Amado just feels like going to the club, he’s taking you with him and always having an arm around you at all times

He HAS to be leading you around the party and introducing you to everyone, godddd, he addresses you to everyone like

“Mira, les presento a mi mujer, la reina de Juárez”

Like, damnnn

I can imagine , like you getting up to get a drink while he talks with the others and he’s pulling you back asking where you’re going with like worried eyes

“Voy agarrar una bebida”

“No, mi reina, yo te lo agarro, siéntate”

Everyone of the guys teasing the shit out of him but he’s just all like, “ustedes no saben que es el verdadero amor, hijos de la chingada”

But they’re not gonna lie, they all respect you and enjoy your presence

Even though he doesn’t like you knowing or being involved in depth about his business, he doesn’t mind you sitting with him during any kind of meeting talk inside of the clubs

Your just curled up into his chest with your drink, minding your own business

That,, or you’ll wander off but not before Amado orders a couple of his men to keep an eye on you

I’m swooning, can you imagine bringing him food to the construction site because you just know he hasn’t eaten all day

The fucking smile he has when he sees you because he literally forgets all the pendejadas and stress he has

LORd,, you know when Acosta was talking about retiring and living a normal life with Mimi,, can you imagine like he’s trying to convince Amado to do the same with you,,

I can’t,, and Amado just looking at where your talking with Mimi or something and just the fucking heart eyes he has because it does sound like a good idea

But, we all know, you can’t just retire from this business :((((((

Look, this man would triple your security after he learns what happened to Güeritos family because of the deal he made with Pacho and what if Miguel were to find out sooner

He’s gonna take his precautions to protect his queen alright, pero discretamente, he doesn’t want to alarm everyone especially Felix

Ooooh myyyy, why do I see him building you a home secretly, like he says he’s going to do handle some shit in Juarez on his day off but in reality he’s building a home for you two🥺🥺

The day he surprises it with you, he’s all like

“Es nuestra casa, mi reina, te gusta?”

Your just so speechless because you cannot believe this man would go all out for you.

“Mira, allá podemos construir un parquecito o cancha de fútbol para los chamacos o algo, no se, y acá te hice un jardín, ven”

GOD, he’s like a happy puppy showing you all the things he built and is still planning, and you just start crying because your so happy that he wants to build a family with you,, ok I’ll stop, my heart hurts, I’m so soft for Amado

Can you imagine the day you finally get preganant tho,,, just the fucking smile and adoration he has when he sees you doing literally anything

His heart is about to burst when he sees the curve of your belly grow because he did that, your carrying his child

Just the orgullo he has for you both and don’t get me started on how he overprotective he gets because he has a kid on the way-

Overall, your relationship is so cute and strong and just full of pure fucking love

NSFW:

Alright, here we go you nastys

This man LOVES blowjobs especially when he’s had a rough day, so naturally you welcome him home with a surprise

You’re wearing one of his favorite lingeries because he’s always buying you them

And, you know, once he walks in through the door, you’re already waiting for him

“Y Ahora, chula?”

“Te quiero ayudar a relajar, mi amor”

as you drag him to sit down by his belt

God,, I can just picture him on the couch with his head thrown back and one of his hands tangled into your hair as he desperately thrusts into your mouth

“Puta Madre”

As he looks down at you just full blown mesmerized

When he gets frustrated over the dumb things he has to put up with, like the time Miguel accepted to transport 70 tons of coke 👀,,,, you best believe he’s gonna take it out on you in the bedroom

You know like giving you rough and needy kisses as he picks you up and heads towards your bedroom

You’re working on unbuttoning his shirt as he’s basically tearing off whatever your wearing

I can see him wanting to caress your body and take his time but god damn his lust is getting the better of him and your only encouraging him more when you grind your hips on his OOOF

One of his favorite positions is having your legs spread as far as they can and wrapping one of his hands around your throat,,, he loves the sight of it

He does not go slow and soft ok, Amado is going in rough and pounding you into next week

When he’s feeling especially rough and dominant, he’s taking you from behind and pulling your own hair

Always scolding you if you try to keep quiet,,, he’ll do those slow but really rough thrusts just so you can whimper something out until he has you screaming

He once made the mistake of inviting Acosta to sleep over one day because of business and it was the first and last time Amado will ever do that

He had you screaming out his name as he fucked you into the bed that night,,

Amado had forgot he had guests over

So the next day when he’s having a drink with Acosta out in the patio in the morning, it’s the first thing Pablo brings up

“ cabrón, iba a llamar a los paramédicos anoche, pensé que estabas matando a tu mujer” he says it so irritated too

Amado is just like,, confused at first and looking weirdly at him because like tf is he talking about??

“ Será un milagro si no la dejas embarazada, tontín”

That’s when it comes together and Amado is trying to pathetically explain

“No cabrón, yo no quiero saber como se la metes” while he’s like laughing at Amados expression

You’re always pulling on his hair whenever he’s going down on you or pounding into you and he loves it because then he knows he’s doing a good job

He also loves it when your scratching down his back and leaving evidence of your night spent together

He’s always down to leave marks on you but in discrete areas, he’s not one to flaunt about your private lives

God, when this man takes you on vacations to places around the world, you best believe that he’s fucking you, either on the plane, at the place y’all are staying or even at the hidden beaches he’ll take you

He wants to make your vacations memorable and tbh, you two are like horny teenagers

THE CHAIN, y’all know the virgin chain he has on,, girl, he’s dicking you down and your holding onto that for dear life as you pull him down for a messy kiss,, yeah, I’m going to hell😅

He definitely has a thing for you when you wear his black shirts, whether it be the morning after or you just pulled it out of the closet and felt like wearing it

He thinks you look so beautiful wearing his clothes,,,,, he’s also had you wear only his shirt when you two have sex at times because, wow what a sight,,,, you, his reina wearing his things- ugh

He also makes sure to leave you satisfied before he has to go fly somewhere,

He has to have a fresh memory of his cock sliding in and out of you as your writhing below/above him

A refresh of what your moans and facial expressions are so he has them freshly engrained into his memory

Okkkk,,, Your just so damn perfect to this king

[ksyescribe]

The Boys™ Speaking A Foreign Language (HQ Edition)

Featuring: Oikawa, Osamu, & Ushijima

Warnings: Some slight manga spoilers!

A/N: This headcanon is centered around these bbs speaking Spanish but I think they can really be applied to any language! I hope you guys enjoy! Also thank you @cttnclouds​ for the Osamu fusion idea you’re literally an angel and i love you.

Oikawa Tōru

Why he learned: 

He moved to Argentina. It’s either learn or get really got at using hand signals.

Learning Process: 

Honestly? Probably tried the whole DuoLingo thing the first few weeks after he got the okay to move to Argentina. But after a while he burnt out.

He probably got up to like the introductory phrases and then fell off. Probably because he had to deal with all the logistical stuff that comes with moving.

(Someone help him cause he literally thought moving would be an easy one two three job :’) Iwa-chan help!)

The next time he remembers that he’s literally going to a new country with a new language is like a month before he moves.

He’s shopping with Iwaizumi for some new clothes and stuff when Iwaizumi just goes “So how’s your Spanish coming along?

freeze frame, his face looks like this: (∩╹□╹∩)

Anyways he really like stress buys like three different Japanese books that he then FORGETS ABOUT for the rest of the month.

He reads them on the flight to Argentina. The only things he learned were how to ask for the time and directions. 

Oh boy, Argentina’s going to be fun :’)

When he uses Spanish in front of you for the first time:

Right so, the first time you see him use his sorry excuse for Spanish is at the little corner coffee shop down the street

Of course everyone’s like eyeing him cause, why is a foreigner here in the hidden gem of the city? But also he’s kinda cute what?

Anyways, you’re minding your own business until you hear the heavily accented Spanish.

And pues, we’re all little chismosos so of course you pay attention to what he’s trying to do (order a coffee but he literally cant remember what the word for sugar is dear god someone help this man)

After cringing you step up with the translator app on your phone open and obviously help him out. 

He’s a little impressed because: 1. Your Spanish is so smooth and flowy it sounds like you’re reciting poetry and 2. Why didn’t he think of the translator app tf??

So you get his order shoot it back to Sandra over the counter in fast Spanish and then order your own stuff before moving off to the side to wait for your coffee.

Oikawa might be an idiot right but he’s not going to pass up the opportunity to ask you to teach him Spanish?? 

I mean you’re cute, you’re obviously a local from the way you were greeting everyone inside the shop, and well, you’re the only person who’s tried to help him out so far and that means a lot to him.

For some odd reason you actually agree? You still don’t know what caused you to say yes. Probably the pitiful look he had when he told you he had to move cause of work and he knew nobody else here.

How you help him with learning/bettering his Spanish:

Honestly, he bitched a lot at the beginning but forcing him to only communicate in Spanish really helped him out. 

So taking him on town trips and having him tell you about what he’s seen or what he wants to do in Spanish really helped him. Also having your friends come with is really fun cause he tries to teach them some Japanese words while they translate that into Spanish.

Also being immersed in the language is a big plus.

But I think the #1 thing that really helped him was watching novelas with you. 

Like he wants to understand what Gabriela is yelling to Sofia about in real time not through the subtitles. (But damn Gabriela really slept with Sofia’s fiance? Wack, that man is not worth it hun)

You know his Spanish’s getting better when you walk into a completely new bread shop that the two of you are visiting and he just goes ahead and orders in fluent Spanish.

Leaves both you and the attendant in shock. But he just comes back and asks you in Spanish too, “Lo hice bien? No me trave verdad?”

The woman literally swoons from the whole encounter. He is now a danger to any woman within five miles of the vicinity. Gets all cocky about it.

Favorite Spanish Word: Alborotar - Disturb? That’s what google says but it’s more like mess up.

Miya Osamu

Why he learned:

Honestly? This Mexican-Japanese fusion place opened up and he just wants to talk to the chef about where he gets his ingredients from because this shit tastes amazing!!

Learning Process:

Went home the first night after eating at that restaurant and bought a year subscription for Rosetta Stone. 

He’s kind of regretting it because like, maybe he should’ve gone with the monthly plan? Fuck he shouldn’t have gotten ahead of himself.

He tries to do an hour of the program a day minimum. There’s some days where the hour like drags on and other days where he’s so pumped that he does more than one hour.

His max was one day where it snowed so hard that nobody could go out so he spent like 10 hours doing Rosetta Stone.

He tried going to like one of the Brazilian stores around his house to try out his Spanish with them but was sorely disappointed to learn that Brazilians do not speak Spanish.

Still got some bomb ass brigadeiros though so who’s the real winner here huh? 

Actually put up a craigslist ad for a Spanish partner. 

It’s up for a whopping 5 minutes before he promptly deleted the ad. 

Instead!! This man signs up for one of those international pen pal services and gets matched with someone fluent in Spanish (it’s you hello).

And it turns out said person is coming to Japan soon for a year abroad?? And they have a basic Japanese foundation?

Yeah dude he lucked out.

Out of all three boys, his alone learning goes pretty well. Gets a good foundation of Spanish.

When he uses Spanish in front of you for the first time:

This one’s so cute!! He actually does it sort of by accident?

He’s made friends with everyone at the fusion restaurant including the chef because he actually managed to hold a decent conversation in Spanish.

His brain just automatically switches to Spanish when he enters the restaurant.

So when you hear him bust out into a full fluent Spanish conversation with the waiter you kind of sit there like: (・о・)

This man even orders and asks you if you want to split a bottle of wine in Spanish.

You could only nod because holy shit. 

Like yes you’ve heard him speak it over the discord calls before but in person?? That’s a whole nother story.

Specially because his pronunciation is so good?? And he has the right accent? It’s so smooth like it just flows naturally from him.

And he can actually roll the r’s god damn sir

How you help him with learning/bettering his Spanish:

So he has a pretty good grasp on the language which means he doesn’t need much help with learning.

But you can help expand his knowledge. Like teaching him about how in some countries/dialects things might be said differently. (Like how there’s 17 ways to say straw. Hondurans say pajilla and that’s all I knew for a bunch of years)

He’ll also need help with learning about a lot of food names. He only knows the basic names, not any special fruits or like combination dishes so that’ll be fun. 

You actually start cooking new latin recipes every Saturday so he can familiarize himself with the cuisine.

Some ingredients are hard to come by but the adventure in finding them is so worth it.

His favorite recipe so far? Making Pollo con Tajadas from Honduras. The Bandeja Paisa from Colombia is a close second.

Favorite Spanish Word: Popote: Straw (in Mexico)

Ushijima Wakatoshi

Why he learned:

His last current concern is literally “he would like to work harder at studying languages”. 

Fair, makes sense. 

But instead of going with a familiar language he just says fuck it time to learn the latin alphabet with Spanish. 

yeah okay why not

Learning Process:

Ushijima is more of a visual learner. 

Which in it’s own makes sense. He’ll probably get a book that has like those floating numbers over items and it tells him what it’s called in Spanish right?

Wrong.

You know what he does?

This man. This 24 year old man. Goes home, opens up Netflix, and puts on... wait for it... DORA.

I kid you not!! Ushijima Wakatoshi will always begin learning a new language by watching children’s shows.

You know why? 

Because he read an article a while back where it said that the best way to start learning languages is by watching children’s shows due to the fact that the shows are literally tailored to teach kids the language.

See what he did there? Y’all thought he was a big dumb dumb but in reality he’s a big smart smart.

Uh, anyways.

He will sit down to watch the children’s shows with a notebook. He takes very good notes, has a Japanese translation for everything.

His show watch list: Dora la Exploradora, Plaza Sesamo, Maya Y Miguel, Go Diego Go, and Handy Manny.

The crazy thing? It actually works. He literally gets his Spanish base from these shows. 

Crazier thing? HE LITERALLY PICKS UP THE CORRECT ACCENTS.

I kid you not bro, he literally somehow managed to sound like a FLUENT speaker. I-

But from there he picks up some more books and audio files to try and increase the complexity of his knowledge.

He’s the best speaker out of the three.

When he uses Spanish in front of you for the first time:

Honestly? He’s been looking for a Spanish partner for a while and he genuinely doesn’t know how to go about it. 

One day though, he overhears you on the phone with your mom. 

He’s seen you before. You’re one of the girls working under the main manager and you’re actually really helpful. If he remembers correctly, you’re the only co-manager that can wrap the compression sleeves just how he likes them.

Anyways, not uh, important.

He’s not one to eavesdrop but, well you’re in the equipment room and he needs to grab one thing. Just a quick in and out. He’ll even turn off his ears.

But then you start speaking like fluent Spanish? And suddenly his ears are very active. 

He doesn’t harass you while you’re on your call. Instead he waits until after practice.

Then he just comes up to you and goes, “Perdóname por molestarte pero, estabas platicándo en Español anterior?”

Kind just sat there like: ◉‿◉ - (￣ー￣) - ⚈ ̫ ⚈

You can’t even speak, you’re still processing that he just spoke Spanish like a natural??? So you just nod.

He launches into a whole talk about how he’s been learning but he needs a speaking partner so that he can get better.

At some point during his whole speech you sit down because your brain IS NOT CATCHING UP.

In the end you agree to become his partner. He’s paying you in food how the hell can you say no?

How you help him with learning/bettering his Spanish:

Like I said before, he’s already good.

You mostly help broaden his knowledge about the culture from Spanish countries and their cultures. A lot of it is through food and the small glimpses of hispanic life from Japan. 

Can’t really teach the customs and traditional stuff unless it’s in person.

You’re actually getting ready to go back home for your once a year family reunion when suddenly this man invites himself to your trip?????

I mean, it’s not a bad idea in the first place but then he offered to pay for your trip and well...

You’re kind of broke and he’s rich so it works alright?

God but going back home? Ultra boosts his spanish.

Not sure if it’s the atmosphere, your family, or just the fact that the country is now in a whole nother language, but this man just adapts. 

It’s really uncanny. 

While he’s here, your family teaches him a lot of Spanish idioms and phrases that don’t translate over well and he starts incorporating them into his every day usage.

Someone on the team got hurt and he literally walked over and rubbed their wrist and went “ Sana, sana, colita de rana. Si no sanas hoy, sanarás mañana.”

When you leave his apartment? “Te veo Mateo”

But he also gets to see how unique and beautiful the culture in your country is. 

His favorite part of the trip? Probably your family’s land that’s just surrounded by nature.

He also really liked the traditional shops that the old ladies from the village ran. (They also liked him and pinched his cheeks and called him a big strong boy so maybe that has something to do with it.)

His favorite Spanish word: Topogigio (to-po-i-yo): In Honduras, frozen ice cream (? not really but don’t know how else to describe) that is typically sold in a small bag. Flavors: Fruit juice or traditional ice cream flavors. 

[twinklecheeks]

Friends With Benefits (Jeff Wittek Imagine) Part 10

Summary: Jeff and Y/N have been hooking up for a while. The whole vlog squad assumes they’re dating and Y/N does too but Jeff doesn’t like labels. He eventually starts to express interest in Natalie.

Note: Planning on making this a multiple part series, depending on how good it does.  You’re 21 & Latina in this (maybe) series. Also, I’d like to apologize for the typos, if there is any. I’m just illiterate lmao.  

Side note: I am SO SORRY I’ve been MIA since May? June?. I was planning to write chapters throughout the summer but this quarantine thing really affected my mental health. I hope you guys understand. Also, I’m starting my last semester of college next week so Idk my posting schedule.

Warnings! Pregnancy

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 , Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9

Word Count: 2.1k

Okay so now that y/n and Jeff had a rather… Interesting time in Big Bear, they end it with bad news…. And Jeff still hasn’t told his parents about y/n. Christmas is in less than a week! What can go wrong?

12/20/19

Y/n: JEFF. YOU NEVER TOLD YOUR PARENTS THAT I WAS PREGNANT???!

Jeff: hey hey hey, can you calm down. Knowing the piece of shit I can be, I didn’t think I was going to be in your life. But look, I surprised myself!

Y/n: So absolutely no one knows?

Jeff: Karyn does…. Maybe my brother Steven too. Karyn basically knows the whole story.

Y/n: Are your parents going to be mad?

Jeff: Haha no. My ma has been begging me to straighten myself out and have a family. If they knew the whole story,... then they’d kill me.

Y/n: Is it just going to be us and the rest of your fam?

Jeff: Oh I forgot to tell you, Jonah’s family is coming too.

Y/n: Really?! Thank god. If it gets awkward, I can just stuff my face in the corner w/ Jonah.

Jeff: Don’t do that. You have to eat healthy.

Y/n: *gives Jeff a death glare*

Jeff: At least try to. Come on I just don’t want any other risks for the girls.

Y/n: Yeah…. I guess. What are we going to do if they’re deaf? I don’t know whether to choose the cochlear implant for selfish reasons or to let them grow up deaf and learn sign language.

Jeff: If they grow up deaf, we’re gonna have to take one or both of them to speech therapy and that’s going to be extremely difficult because they’re not going to hear if what they’re saying is pronounced right.

Y/n: Maybe we should give them the implant and make them learn sign language? I mean, it’s always beneficial to know another language.

Jeff: But we also have to remember that there’s a chance the implant won’t work and they’re going to have to grow up deaf. Also, remember that there’s a possibility that only one of them is born deaf.

Y/n: I hate how we’re talking about this before Christmas. I thought this was supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year.

Jeff: It is but hey, if my ma gets mad at us, we’re breaking the ice w/ the babies possibly being deaf.

Y/n: JEFF.

Jeff: Oh shut up you know you would do that too w/ your parents.

Y/n: *rolls her eyes* I mean… you’re not wrong.

Jeff: Now hurry up and pack your stuff. We have an early flight tomorrow.

12/21/19

*At the airport w/ the Antonyan’s*

Suzie: I can’t believe we’re spending Christmas in New York!

Jonah: It’s gonna be so cold there though.

Vardon: Shut up Jonah. It’s a free present from David.

Jeff: Hey I’m gonna give y’all a heads up that my parent’s do not know that y/n is pregnant.

Everybody: *looks at Jeff for being a dumbass*

Suzie: You’re so stupid.

Jonah: I agree

Jonah’s mom: She look like she gonna give birth tomorrow and you no tell your parents?!

Jonah’s dad: You in big trouble Jeff

Y/n: *Laughing*

Jeff: Let’s just get on the plane.

*They arrive in New York*

Y/n: Jeff, we can’t just show up to your parent’s house and they see how pregnant I am. It’s going to ruin Christmas!

Jeff: Don’t worry. I’m sure they're going to be fine. I think.

Y/n: JEFF.

Jeff: *sees his older sister* Hey look it’s Karyn!

Karyn: *moves Jeff out of the way* Oh my god y/n! Can't believe you’re having twins!

Y/n: Jeff hasn’t told your parents about me yet.

Karyn: *turns to Jeff* JEFF ARE YOU FUCKIN STUPID

Jeff: Hey can y’all wait to yell at me after we leave the airport. People are staring

*In the car*

Karyn: Jeff I know I gave you a deadline to tell Ma and Pa but that didn’t mean to WAIT UNTIL THE DEADLINE.

Jeff: Everybody just loves to yell at me today

Y/n: How do you honestly think they’re going to react.

Karyn: They probably think Natalie is gonna come

Y/n: *getting madder by the second* THEY KNEW ABOUT NATALIE AND NOT ABOUT ME WHEN I WAS WITH YOU BEFORE HER AND FOR MUCH LONGER.

Jeff: Thanks a lot Karyn why tf did you have to say that.

Karyn: Hey, this is your fault. Not ours. You have to think of a way to tell mom and dad.

Suzie: *sitting in the back* This is going to be an interesting Christmas.

*Jeff’s parent’s house*

Jeff: Here goes nothing. *opens the door* hey ma?? *looks around*

Karyn: Maybe they left to get last minute things for Christmas.

Y/n: Cool, gives me time to hide.

Karyn: Hun, everything is going to be fine.

*another car pulls into the driveway*

Y/n: Oh god I’m going to throw up

Jeff: How about you go to my old room and I talk to them.

Y/n: *walks to Jeff’s old room* What if Jeff’s parents are disappointed that I’m not Natalie? They knew about her and not me.

*Jeff’s parents walk in*

Jeff’s mom: My baby boy! I know it’s only been a month but I love it everytime you come home. Sorry we weren’t here. We were buying more food just in case. You didn’t bring Natalie?

Jeff: About that, her and I are done… for good.

Jeff’s dad: Oh well, that’s too bad son.

Karyn: *whispers* But he did bring someone else…

Jeff: *shoves Karyn* hey, shut it. Ma…. Pa…. There was someone else before Natalie… We went out for a while but I broke it off w/ her cause I was stupid and now we’re back together…

Jeff’s dad: Okay, I don’t see the problem? Is she here?

Jeff: Ummm she is… But there’s something else. She’s pregnant… and they’re mine.

*Jeff’s parents both laugh*

*Everybody else laughs nervously*

Jeff’s mom: Good joke, now where is she?

Karyn: Ma, he’s not joking…

*Jeff’s parents look at everybody*

Jeff’s dad: Oh Jeffrey, what did you do.

Jeff: No no no, everything is fine between us. It was ugly between us at first but now we’re back together.

Jeff’s mom: *processes* WAIT. Did you say “they’re mine” as in PLURAL?!

Jeff: Umm yeah. She’s having twins.

Jeff’s mom: I don't know whether to be angry or excited. I mean I’m going to be a grandmother again!

Jeff’s Dad: If he’s on good terms w/ her and is back together w/ her, I see no problem.

Jeff: Y/n you wanna come out?

Y/n: *Walks out slowly* Hii

Jeff’s mom: My god, how far along are you?

Y/n: 5 months

Jeff’s mom: *turns to Jeff* You kept this from us for HOW LONG.

Jeff: We can talk about that later but at least give a warm welcome to the mother of your soon to be granddaughters.

Jeff’s family: IT’S TWIN GIRLS

Jeff’s mom: Oh my god I feel like fainting but I won’t. Oh dear congratulations. I’m going to spoil those little girls rotten. *hugs y/n*

Y/n: Thank you so much. I was afraid of how you would react.

Jeff’s dad: His mom has been begging him to settle down for years. She finally got her wish.

Jeff’s mom: This is a Christmas gift I wasn't expecting at all but I am so happy for the both of you. Jeffrey is a natural when he spends time w/ his sister’s children.

Y/n: haha that’s good to know.

Jeff’s dad: Dear they’re probably all tired. Let them rest for a bit and we’ll go out later tonight.

*Jeff and Y/n take a nap in Jeff’s old room*

Y/n: Well, that went better than expected. I just wish my parents were like that…

Jeff: Babe don’t worry, they’ll come around.

Y/n: I doubt it. When my older sister moved out, they didn’t talk to her for a year but when our older brother moved out, my parents helped him w/ everything! All I’ve done is please them and I do one thing they don’t like and I’M DISOWNED?? QUE SE VAYAN AL CARAJO!

Jeff: Hey hey hey, calm down. You don’t wanna stress the girls out.

Y/n: I mean, at least my siblings are on my side but they live in Seattle.

Jeff: We also have like 20 friends who will always be w/ us. The twins will always have family around.

Y/n: I’m just wondering when we should tell them about the deaf thing.

Jeff: I think we should wait until after the holidays. Maybe in February? I just think we need our time to process and prepare ourselves for anything before it’s confirmed once they’re born.

Y/n: Yeah, you’re right. But February is my birthday though… I don’t wanna ruin the fun w/ that.

Jeff: Hurry up and get dressed. I have a little surprise for you but you have to close your eyes when you get in the car.

Y/n: Jeff please don’t send me into pre-term labor.

Jeff: Don’t worry. It’s nothing bad. I think you’ll love it.

*Jeff drives to Brooklyn*

Jeff: Okay we're almost there. Are your eyes still closed?

Y/n: Yeeees. Boy I’m getting impatient.

Jeff: We’re here. I’ll help you get out of the car. Okay now you can open your eyes.

Y/n: *turns around* NO FUCKING WAY. RIMINI’S.

Jeff: Yeah. I remember you sayin that you came to this bakery all the time. And that they had your favorite cookies in the world.

Y/n: Jeff. I haven't been here in 10 years. My grandpa would always take me here. I lived 5 minutes down the street.

Jeff: That’s why I brought you here. I knew how much it meant to you.

Y/n: I know you’re not proposing but I would’ve said yes in a millisecond. Now let’s go inside! I have to get their italian butter cookies and I’m bringing a bunch back to LA. I don’t know the next time I’ll  be able to come back.

Jeff: I mean, we’d be coming back quite often after the babies are born to visit my family.

Y/n: Okay but I’m still bringing a bunch back. You can’t get anything like this back in LA.

Jeff: But don’t go overboard w/ the sweets. You don’t want gestational diabetes.

Y/n: *death glares* You sayin I eat too much?

Jeff: No no no, you know what I mean.

Y/n: *pouts* But they taste so good :(

Jeff: Which means you should ration them as much as possible. Also, when we film for my channel, you might wanna hide these from Jonah.

Y/n: I swear to god if Jonah even THINKS about eating my damn cookies, I’m going to jail for manslaughter…

Jeff: Hun, what did I say about the anger. Don’t stress the girls out.

*Back at Jeff’s house*

Jeff’s dad: Well look who finally came back. We wanted to take you guys out but y’all left.

Jeff: Sorry pops, Y/n and I went to Brooklyn. She lived there until she was 11.

Jeff’s mom: Oh wow, I wouldn’t have guessed you were from New York too.

Y/n: Yeah, my parents moved my older siblings and I to Seattle because it was getting hard w/ the cost of living. Also, my grandfather passed away, so there wasn’t really any reason for us to stay there. My parent’s LOVED living here.

Jeff’s dad: Your parents are from New York too?  

Y/n: No. My parents immigrated from Peru. My dad came in the 70s as a teenager and went back and forth. My mom immigrated here in the 80s. They still have a bunch of friends here and they still know the city like they still live here.

Jeff’s mom: Why didn’t you invite them for Christmas in the city. I bet it would bring back so many good memories for them.

Y/n: *sighs* Well, we're kind of not talking at the moment… They were really disappointed when I told them I was pregnant. My older siblings are supportive though.

Karyn: Well that’s good that you have older siblings that will always look out for you. That’s why I give dumb dumb over there *points at Jeff* a hard time.

Jeff: What the fuck.

Karyn: They’ll come around eventually but even if it takes an eternity, just know that you have us now. We’re family! Even if Jeff somehow messes things up w/ you in the future.

Jeff: Ma can you tell her to stop!

Jeff’s mom: Karyn, stop bullying your brother.

Next chapter is CHRISTMAAAAS. (Don’t worry it’s already done. I won't post it for another couple of days) Also, some of the stuff in this chapter is kind of based on me. (Not the pregnant thing. I’ve never been pregnant lmao) But I was born in Brooklyn and the immigrant parents/ moving away thing is from my real life. (but not the moving away cause of grandpa. He was still alive for a couple years after.) But the cookies from Rimini’s… Will change your LIFE.

Comment if you want to be on the taglist!

Taglist: @elvlogsquad​​ @siemprestan​​ @zavidzobrik​​ @galxydefender​​ @iminlovewithenchilidadas​​ @ilsolee​​ @ranprivate​ @one-sweet-gubler​  @sunwardsss​ @shamalamashams​ @michellemxndes​

[side-effect-of-the-meds]

So, it seems that some of y’all have taken an interest in Niko!!! I’m so glad. Anyway, here’s part two

Nikoshi is torn between charging up to hug his literal fucking idol and keeping up a cool kid facade. Fortunately, the cool kid facade wins out. If Niko had touched Kevin, he would not have been able to stop himself from flinging the kid across the lawn. There’s something that’s just so… so… Riko about the kid that Kevin is on the verge of breakdown. 

Ichirou kind of ushers him into the house and Kevin sits down very mechanically on the couch. From the kitchen, Aaron walks out and is faced with Niko for the first time. Niko’s heard about Kevin Day’s husband before but he’s never seen him. 

“You’re really short,” is the first thing out of his mouth. This kid, this absolute asshole, walks into his fucking house and the first fucking thing he says is ‘You’re really short’???? Aaron is so stunned by this kid and his bullshit that he doesn’t even say anything.

Amalia wanders out from the kitchen at the commotion in the living room and the second she sees Niko her first reaction is friend????? New fren??????? She’s very excited. Before she can go out and say anything, Aaron snags her and makes his way into the living room to sit beside Kevin and sets her in his lap. She keeps squirming bc she wants to meet new fren. 

Anyway, Ichirou has already called the two of them and has informed him of who the kid is. They’re going to have to take him to the doctor and get some ‘blood work’ done to confirm Ichirou’s suspicions but they already know. He looks too much like Riko to not be his kid

Ichirou asks a few questions, all of which Aaron has to answer seeing as Kevin is too busy silently flipping his shit. Both Niko and Kev spend the whole half an hour just staring at each other in awestruck silence. 

Ichirou leaves and Aaron says it’s time for dinner. They all eat at the dinner p quietly, except for Amalia who has run out of patience. She insists on sitting next to Niko and blabbering on and on about something or the other. She’s 5 at this point so she’s mostly talking about her crayons and showing Niko that she can count to fifty. For the most part, Niko is content to listen to her bc it means he doesn’t really have to talk. 

After dinner, Aaron takes Niko upstairs to show him his room and hands him some clothes. As soon as Aaron heard the news, he’d gone down to target and just picked some random basic shit out. He tells Niko that they’ll go to the mall soon so that they can pick up a few things that’ll actually fit him. Niko’s never had new clothes in his life. He doesn’t know how to feel about it. 

He puts all of his emotions aside for the time being. He’ll have to evaluate them later. Niko starts to pull his shirt off and he hears Aaron gasp. Only then does he realize that the bruises from his last foster haven’t faded yet. He goes red and backs away, trips over something and falls onto his butt. 

“Niko-” Aaron started, moving forward. Immediately, Niko flinched violently and Aaron stilled. Schooling his face into neutrality, Aaron dropped his hands to his side. “Get changed and come down. I want to see the bruises.” 

“No,” Niko spat.

“I’m not asking,” Aaron countered flatly. “As soon as you’ve changed, you will come downstairs and we will treat the bruises. Are we clear?” Niko nodded. Aaron backed out of the room, shutting the door to give Niko some privacy. 

“What bruises?” Kevin asked, starling a curse out of him. 

“Kev, he’s covered in them,” Aaron replied. Anger burned in his chest. In that moment, there was nothing Aaron wanted more than to hunt down whomever had hurt Niko so badly and beat them black and blue. All that kept him grounded was the pain of his nails biting into his palms. He felt Kevin’s arms wrap around him and he left himself be held. “He looks worse than I ever did,” Aaron whispered. His voice sounded hollow, even to his own ears. 

“He’s going to be okay, baby. He’s here now. We’ll take care of him,” Kevin assured as he stroked his hair. 

A few minutes later, Niko steps out and lets them take him downstairs. Amalia is long gone, put to bed so that she doesn’t witness this absolute horror that her dads are about to see. Aaron has a makeshift clinic set up in the house and he makes Niko sit down on the little bed and take his shirt off. 

Kevin curses and gets smacked for cursing in front of Niko. After figuring out how old they are, Aaron sets to work massaging creams into them to heal them faster. His hands are firm, unyielding, but gentle enough that they don’t hurt. It’s a foreign feeling to Niko. He’s never not been touched by anyone without them intending for him to hurt. 

Aaron asks Niko if there are anymore. Niko is tempted to lie to him but something in Aaron’s dark brown eyes coaxes him into telling the truth. He wriggles out of his pants to show him the bruises on his legs. 

Lashes from rulers stripe his legs. A few scars have accumulated from the metal part cutting into his skin. Kevin sucks a breath in through his teeth when he sees them. He’s been hit with the metal edge of a ruler before. He’s got the same scars on his legs. 

Aaron rubs scar cream into them and takes care of the remaining bruises. He’s so pissed off and it shows on his face. Niko, the poor, sweet bean thinks that Aaron is mad at him. So many adults have gotten angry with him for being such a problem. 

He slides off the table when Aaron tells him to and changes back into his clothes. They dismiss him so he slips back upstairs. Kevin and Aaron stay downstairs to talk for a little while. Neither of them say it outloud but they both come to the consensus that, Riko’s son or not, they will protect Niko with their lives. 

It’s not quite as easy as you’d think. Riko was such a bitch and he caused them and their families so much pain. Over the course of the next few months, every time Niko raises his voice, Kevin flinches violently. There are times when Aaron has to discreetly escort him away to help him avoid the impending panic attack. 

They’d told Bee that they were taking in Riko’s son and she’d mentioned that it would be hard on Kev but Aaron hadn’t thought it would be this bad. It’s been almost twelve years since Riko’s death but Kevin is still such a broken man. 

That doesn’t mean he isn’t trying. Kev drives Niko to school himself every day and picks him up from the bus stop every morning. They work on his history projects together and stress out over math together. Aaron is an amazing science tutor but he’s also very insistent that Niko actually learns things for himself.

Over the summer, Kev takes Niko to the court Every. Single. Day. Aaron, who’s the head physician for Kevin’s team is almost always sitting on the sideline with Amalia to keep an eye on them. He doesn’t need Kev killing their kids. 

Most of Kevin’s frustration comes from the fact that Niko shows absolutely NO POTENTIAL. I mean, baby boi is just tripping over his own two feet and can barely keep track of his steps while holding the ball only to have Kevin just FUCKING BARREL INTO HIM BC HE KNOWS NO RESTRAINT ON THE COURT BC HE’S A DUMBASS!

Anyway, Aaron eventually intervenes and kicks Kev off the court. He just kinda sits a really huffy Niko down on the bench and asks him if something’s wrong. After a great deal of gently coaxing, Niko admits that Kevin is kind of scary. 

Aaron digs his shit out of the closet and steps on the court and he helps teach Niko the basics. In a week, Niko is playing incredibly well for his age and Kevin is pissed bc how tf did Aaron manage this????

Anyway, Niko is playing really well by then so he tries out for the team and makes it! He’s playing varsity despite being in 7th grade and is a starting offense dealer. 

He tried out for dealer in middle school but he only ever plays as a striker at home. It’s his secret and he’s not keen to show his hand just yet. He’s also a halfway decent goalkeep. That being said, both Aaron and Kev are comparing him to the best goalkeep in the Southern circuit so calling him half-way decent is an understatement but I digress.

Anyway, he’s an incredible player bc he has a lot of individual skill but he’s not much of a team player. More than once, he’s mouthed off to the wrong kid and gotten himself into trouble. That being said, he’s really fast so he’ll just nyoom off before anyone can beat his ass and no one has the time or energy to pursue him for it. 

It’s not until 8th grade that he gets into serious trouble. 

Kev and Aaron are called down to the school bc Niko’s gotten himself into a fight. When they get there, they just about die. Their baby boy has a massive black eye and there’s bruises on his arm from someone holding him down. They are so so so pissed off. 

When they ask what happens Niko doesn’t say anything. One of the kids says that he was bullying them. Neither Kev nor Aaron buy that. 

What happened was a bunch of kids were picking on someone and Niko was having none of that shit. He absolutely unleashed and shreds the kids, picking out insecurities they didn’t even know they had and trashing them. So caught up in roasting these ho’s Niko didn’t realize it was time to dip until it was too late. The kids beat the crap out of him and he can barely stand. 

When the kid Niko was defending ghosts into the room Kev and Aaron immediately know what’s going on.

Niko,,,,,,, has caught feelings. Babie is looking at this kid like they hung the goddamn moon and, honestly, they couldn’t past them. Winter Aziz (they/them) is,,,,, stunning and it wouldn’t surprise either of Kev or Aaron if they’d crafted the moon. The two of them are now betting on how long it’s going to take Niko to figure out he likes the kid. 

But back to the actual story. 

Anyway, once Winter gives their side of the story, the dean admits that the boys were in the wrong. Two of the boys end up getting suspended. Apparently, Winter’s parents are busy so they offer them a ride home. In the rearview mirror, Kev can see Niko squirming bc Winter is just sitting so close!!!! They stop by this lil diner that Niko loves and buy him a milkshake. They offer to buy Winter one too but they decline. Niko ends up offering to share and its ADORABLE!!!! Aaron snaps a pic and sends it to Kev so that they can both be reminded of this cuteness. 

Anyway, needless to say, Winter and Niko are now best friends. They do everything together and have a lot of,,,,,,, sleepovers in which Kev and Aaron feel really bad bc Niko’s gone gone for his best friend and Winter doesn’t seem to notice. 

That’s bullshit. Winter knows Niko likes them. They’re just not ready to admit that they like him too. 

Over the summer before 9th grade, Winter becomes a part of their summer practice. They’ve taken an interest in sports medicine bc they can be close to Niko.

Midway through July, Kevin gives up trying to get Niko to be a team player. He’s just not the kind of person who can teach him how to be that kind of person. 

But he knows someone who can. 

It’s a late night on the court and Niko’s run himself ragged. 

“It’s no use to play against an empty goal,” a voice Niko knows too well said. It took every ounce of his energy to sit up enough to see Neil Josten standing above him. “Why don’t you give him a real challenge?” he asked as he stepped aside, revealing a man who looked exactly like Niko’s dad. The man said nothing. Instead, he moved quietly to stand in the goal. “Better hurry up, Niko. Andrew doesn’t like to be kept waiting.” With that, Neil left Niko on the court to face off against the best goalkeep in the Southern circuits all on his own.

[dontbesoweirdkira]

Hi there! Just found your blog and I like it so far. Btw being Present Mics favorite student headcanons were amazing, as a bnha nerd may I request a part 2 where Mic meets readers parents and other stuff? Sorry if my English is bad.

A/N:Thank you so much for liking my blog and choosing to request, that means a whole lot! I got you with the Present Mic headcanons, please let me know if you want any more Present Mic stuff i’m here. I’m sorry this request took so long to come out, i was busy with a few thing please love me

-So i would feel this year would be a lot of fun, just like last year but the only difference being you are working harder towards your hero license and school is becoming much more difficult. This means that you have to up your game with your quirk skills and tactics while staying on top of your studies. You are stressed to say the least.

-Like i said previously present Mic knows when you are having a hard time, believe it or not he is quite attentive and super smart so he quickly asses the situation and realizes a few things. He sees you’re struggling with your quirk and school so he takes matters into his own hands.

-He offers to train you and offers extra help with school to you, he only wants to see you succeed even if that means sacrificing his free time.

-”oh- no no Mr.Hizashi that’s so sweet but i know you’re really busy-”

-”SHHHSHHSHSSJSJ Y/N I SHALL GET YOU THAT HERO LICENSE AND HELP YOU PICK UP YOUR GRADES EVEN IF THAT MEANS RISKING A FEW HOURS OF REST, I CANNOT LOSE TO YAGI AND DEKU- i-i- Mean icareaboutyourhealthandgradesandireallywannahelp”

-tHaT soCCer dAD rIvaLrY iS stiLl haPPeNinG 

-Everyday after school you guys meet up at the park or one of the training centers to train for a few hours

-”Now Y/N, breath in and when you breath out use that force to push your quirk-”

-Honestly you thought the training wouldn’t be as hard as it was (it’s Present Mic after all) but boi were you wrong

-”Get up off the ground Y/N, you’ve only been running for .3 seconds”

-”.3 SeCoNdS????? I DID THREE MILES NONSTOP YaMaDA!”

-” hUstLe y/NnNNnN”

-Aizawa comes to your trainings and observes bEcAusE hEs nOSeYy

-He actually helps out and help with things present might not have thought of or isn’t the best at

-This year your relationship with Present actually takes a deeper turn, you find yourself around him more often both in school and after school. You both learn more about each other's quirks and personalities a lot more.

-You thought you already knew a lot about him, given he was like an open book it seemed. But Hizashi is a much deeper and emotional person than you honestly thought and he truly had such a more serious, kindred spirited side to him

-Like sometimes when you guys are taking a break from training he will open up about his life at UA and how it was for him. He told you how he felt kind of odd and awkward and how that’s probably why he can relate to you so so much uwu

-”You know Y/N as much I am super bubbly and “overly confidant” , i still feel super out of place sometimes. I guess i always have it isn’t a new feeling, although I have Aizawa and the other teachers, sometimes I still feel...not understood? If that makes any sense?? But like I totally understand how you feel, and you are not alone...seriously. Thank you for being open to me and allowing me to teach and train you. Kind of makes me feel wanted and useful..haha-”

-iM sOft 

-He always thought of you as a little “sidekick” however recently he kind of looks at you as his own daughter and he’s really protective and fatherly over you. He’s more on top of you and making sure all your ducks are in a row. He’s not controlling or anything like that tho so don’t worry

-”Did you eat yet, Y/N?”

-”are you okay Y/N? You look exhausted.”

-”make sure you finish that report for class, okay? If you need any help let me know.”

-pRotEccS yOu fRom bOys

-If he sees a teacher kind of poking at you and making you feel uncomfortable or feel bad for being a “teacher's pet” he will immediately have them stop. He feels bad you have to get crap from him being a bit biased towards you

-You guys have a secret handshake

-HE’S STILL THE BIGGEST cRacK hEAd I swEar

-*crushes you in a hug* “MISS. AMERICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAAATtattatSSSSSs UpPPPPPPPPPPPp”

-”YO Yo yO AMERiCaAAaAAAA HOw Is IT CrACkINGGGG”

-”YNNNNNNNNN AMErIcAAAA YoUU foRgoT yoUr lUnCH Box iN mY cLaSS *whispers* i put a donut in there for you”

-USES YOU FOR ENGLISH CONVERSATION EXAMPLES IN CLASS ALL THE TIME 

-HE EMBArASSES YOU SO MUCH ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY THIS DUDE NEEDS TO SIT TF DOWN AND LET YOU LIVE POOR GIRL

-It’s okay because he lets you skip class to pass out in the library after being exhausted from everything

-You take his weird sunglasses and strut around with them all the time

-”BlUghH I’m a rich fashion model. WAIT OMG HIZASHI ARE THESE CHILDREN SIZED GLASsES?!?!”

-EmaiLS yOU

-” ohiyo americAa,

It’s me MiC and iM waTchING tHat drAmaA you recommended to me and Im cRyING. Also i heard from the sleepy teacher that there may or may not be a pop quiz in his class on last weeks topic...Anyways I’ll see you tomorrow...unless...Nah just joking okay mic is out!

                                    -Hiz

                              sEnt fRom ToaSter oVeN”

-You get about ten of these things a week from him. help this poor man ;-;

-Made a few youtube videos with him

-He helped you pick out your hero name and outfit, you are so ready to be a hero i swear

-Once you do get your hero license..he is such big boi proud like he’s in tears, snot running out his nose, eyes all puffy and his voice is cracking. He even got you a little teddy bear with a little candy bag attached to it.

-”LOOK LOOOK MR.HIZASHIIIII LOOOK I GOT IT I FINALLY GOT IT THANK YOU SO SO MUCH HIZASHIII I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH THANK YOU”

-”See kiddo, i knew you could do it!”

-” Pfft all thanks to you!! Oh and Hey, Mr.Hizashi? My parent(s) are coming up this weekend to celebrate me getting my license. I was wondering if you would like to come to dinner? They’d like to personally thank you for helping me.”

-THIS MAN IS THE UTMOST HONORED LIKE LET ME TELL YOU HE SAYS YES IN A HEARTBEAT AND IS AT THE RESTAURANT ON LITERAL TIME

 -He somes in a very nice suit with his hair tied into a perfectly neat bun. And is thAT GLasses he’s wearing??????  (so cute omg)

-Him meeting your parent(s) was a pretty chill experience 

-”Mr.Hizashi, right? SO NIce to finally meet you and thank you for everything you have done for Y/N.”

-”Ah, it was my pleasure. And please, call me Yamada.”

-At first it was kind of awkward but once the conversation got going, you guys were there for hours

-and i mean HoURs

-”um excuse mE, wHen aRe yoU gUyS lIkE idk LEAVING???”

-Haha but no, the literal talk was just them hyping you up and how the waiter dramatically fell coming over to the table

-”yeS Y/N is such a great kid i can’t believe you raised such a strong and patient daughter”

-”Did he just trip and act like he didn’t just dropped our food on the ground??”

-”One time Y/N tripped and dropped her easy bake cookies and she didn’t even cry, that’s when we knew she was going to be a pro hero.”

-”did he step on the fries and up it on the plate and try to serve it to us???”

-Also your parent(s) grew up around the same time as Present so they had a lot to talk about and it was interesting learning about each other different childhoods and cultures.

-Your parent(s) seriously enjoyed Hizashi and they would love to talk to him again. Vise versa, it was a great time for Hizashi as well and prepare to hear about it the next time you see him.

-”Thank you Y/N for inviting me and allowing me to meet your parent(s) it was very nice getting to know them. Next time they come up, I must treat them out instead.”

BonUs

-Let’s just make up a different scenario where maybe your parents were kind of rude and not as nice and welcoming, both to you Yamada

-When you heard your parents were coming up to visit you in Japan, you were at first excited. You were still in this frenzy of like “wow i got my hero license” so you weren't thinking about it too much plus you were excited about being treated out to dinner and having your favorite teacher tag along. 

-Everything was great...that was until you started to think about it more and started to question was that such a great idea?? Let’s just say your parents aren’t the nicest people (person). For some reason it seems like they were never proud of you, no matter how well or bad you literally did. 

-Won a championship game? Eh good, but could be better

-4.00 GPA? That’s okay but thousand of kids get that, you have to do better.

-You want to be a pro hero?? Ha in your dreams, that kid next door has a better chance of becoming one than you do.

-You started to realise they were one of the biggest reasons you wanted to exchange to Japan so much. It was far away from them and super peaceful. You wanted to tell Present to not come, but he seemed so excited, and you wanted to tell him how dreaded your parents were. But you didn’t want him to worry and get others involved. So you just hoped and prayed that they would be nice? And everything was okay?

-Everything was okay...for the first five minutes. 

-Well everyone greeted each other and sat down to eat, then the condescending comments started to pour in.

-”Yeah, well I think Y/N will make a perfect Hero in the near future. She’s gotten a lot stronger with her quirk and-”

-”Pfft, let’s not get ahead of ourselves now, Although Y/N has gotten her License that doesn’t mean she’s hero material. We watched the sports festival and compared to the other students, she’s severely overshinned. I just don’t think a year or so of training can fix that. She has to do better.”

-For a second hizashi just sat there with his face utter disbelief. How could someone just say that about their child...in front of their child...so camly?

-He looked over towards your uncomfortable figure, your face was colored with complete dismay, He felt so sad and slightly angry. You didn’t look in a position to defend yourself so he started to speak up for you

-”I really hope the both of you are seriously joking.” he snapped back with a sassy firm tone in his voice which made you look towards the three adults

-”No we are not, Y/N is pretty average and for you to put in her head that she could possibly become a Pro? Haha I understand teachers are supposed to be supportive but like come on now, just be honest with yourself.”

-Hizashi slammed his hands against the table, gaining the attention of everyone in the restaurant, including yourself who was previously looking down to avoid confrontation.

-”How DARE you. Y/N is PERFECTLY  CAPABLE of becoming a hero, her quirk,skills, technique and intelligence is all was stronger than you can even imagine. Do not downgrade her just because you’re too idiotic and narrowminded to see that. She is the sweetest kid I have ever met and quite frankly the purest. Disgusting how you talk about your own child like that. AND IN FRONT OF HER?? Now with all due respect, I think you guys need to do a self reflection and change the wrongs you have within you. If you need any help i don't mind emailing you a list of things.”

-SKSKSKSKSKSKS WOT???? DID MR.HIZASHI THE ALWAYS HAPPY AND CRACKHEADY TEACHER JUST PUT YOUR PARENTS IN THEIR PLACE???? IN FRONT OF A WHOLE RESTURANT??? BEST. TEACHER. EVER.

-on you still wore an embarrassed kind or dismayed face and when Present say that. hE tHoUghT yOU wErE eIthER mAd oR sCaREd oF Him. cri

-In reality you were literally so joyful and happy. LIKE DUUUDEEE. MARRY ME LOLOL. Seriously you were super thankful that he did that for you. 

-He looked around and suddenly realised that all eyes were on him. Aww poor man felt so flustered he didn’t mean to make a fuss and disturb others, he was just so angry your parents were such a*ssholes. 

-He turned to you and bowed while simply muttering “I’m sorry Y/N”, then grabbed his coat and walked out.

-Without even thinking you jumped up and rushed out the door with him, leaving your dumbfounded parents at the restaurant

-”m-Mr.Hizashi wait up!”  you called out from behind the blonde haired man, he stopped in his tracks then pivoted in place to face you

-”y/n im very sorry to you and your family i didn’t mean any disrespect. I understand if you may not want to be around me any more or allow me to train you.”

-”ARE YOU SERIOUS THAT WAS EPIC LIKE SERIOUSLY THEY HAVE BEEN DOING THIS SINCE I CAn rEMEBER I SWEAR YOU ARE SO AWESOME MRHIZASHI THANK YOU THANK YOU LIKE YOU’RE THE DAD I ALWAYS WANTED I FREAKING LOVE YOU AND DID YOU SEE THEIR FACES HAHA BOOM I CAN'T BELIEVE IT TELL ME I-”

-cutting you off from your frenzy and gave you a big bear hug, “haha don’t ever let what they have said about you ever ring in your head...okay L/N? I belive in you and i know you are going to be fucking great.”

-”Really?” you smiled

-”HECK YEAHHHHH, AMERICAAAAAA” 

[morganas-pendragons]

Best Carol/Melissa Episodes

So I got bored in Quarantine and I was so moved by Look At The Flowers that I decided to make this list of the best episodes that either feature Carol/Melissa as a lead or she plays a large part in them. I haven’t seen S1-2 since like... 2014 as they’re my least favorite (i know i’m sorry but i did include honorable mentions) but I’m so freaking proud that I couldn’t not make this list. Here we go! Feel free to add to them! ** means they’re my favorite performances of Melissa! I do mention some scenes that are also with Norman/Daryl as he is a LARGE part of who Carol is. If you think it’s ‘’shippy’’ which it might be, don't read it. I worked on this for almost two hours. 

season 1

- for real, what woman keeps a grenade on hand? That was it. That was where I started paying attention to her. 

- also, the scene where she digs the pickaxe into Ed’s head? I think Daryl and I both fell for her then. 

season 2 

- the honorable mention!! the barn scene in which carol learns the fate of her daughter. I don’t remember most of s2, but this one I do. I think this might’ve been the first point in the show where I was like, “Hey Google, how to protect someone who isn’t real.’’

season 3

- walk with me: We get to see how Carol has changed during her time on the road after the farm and how much she’s learned. This is also, unfortunately, the last time we see her for a couple episodes until Daryl finds her in the cells below. 

- hounded: daryl finds carol. It’s sweet, it’s warm and soft and there’s alot of reunions and alot of mourning over T-Dog and Lori. 

season 4

- Carol has become a leader in her own right for this season. She teaches the kids how to defend themselves during the ruse of a story time and takes on Lizzie and Mika as her own after Ryan is bit. 

- indifference: After killing Karen and David to stop the spread out a virus, Rick takes it into his own hands to banish Carol. This one hurts too because it’s quite obvious why she did it. She did it to protect herself and the people she loves, but sometimes that’s just not enough. 

- the grove: emmy emmy emmy emmy material. Holy crap, I CANNOT stress this enough! This is the make or break episode for Carol as a character. There’s beauty and devastation and anguish all wrapped up into 45 minutes. This should’ve made Melissa well known. This should’ve won her multiple awards, and it didn’t. But we know. We know. 

season 5 

- sanctuary: this one goes down in history for multiple reasons, and most of us know them. 1.) Caryl reunions galore. Even if you don’t ship it, that moment is so, so sweet. 2.) If it weren’t for Carol, your fave would be dead. That’s literally it. 

- consumed: OOF. Really. 

- The back half of season 5 after the arrival at Alexandria is hilarious to me. Because these people are so sheltered from the darkness and the cruelty of the outside world that Carol takes on their own persona to blend in with them, to know the naivety of these people and to hide easily among them to get what she needs. This is also how she befriends Sam, who probably reminds her of Sophia which is why she’s so cruel to him. 

season 6 

- jss**: ‘’Miss Peletier, you are an honest to goodness hero.” No. Freaking. Way.  I remember watching this episode and rocking back and forth on my heels in anticipation because up until this point, I think this might’ve been one of the bloodiest moments in the show - and right in the center of it all is Carol - who is now of the mindset that, ‘’hey, we need to kill, we don’t have a choice.’’ and she portrays the internal struggle behind all of this so, so well. The scene with Melissa holding the body on the stairs was what won me over for this episode. It’s very much a merciless 45 minutes. 

- no way out: Carol is not a lead in this episode, but Melissa is very heavily influenced between this one and the previous because of her confrontation with Morgan. I remember how angry that made me, having to watch him bodyslam her (a former domestic abuse victim) against the floor. Outside of Carol, this episode is one of my favorites in the show. 

- not tomorrow yet/the same boat**: Carol moreso plays a bigger part in the latter as opposed to the former, but these two episodes really showcase two things: Her heart to protect her family (IE: A now pregnant Maggie) and her deteriorating mental state. Outside of The Grove, I think this is one of Melissa’s most powerful performances. it’s also the only female led ep in the show  

- east**: I cried the first time I watched this. Carol vs The Saviors, #2. This episode breaks between Morgan and Rick going out to look for her (HENCE ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE QUOTES ABOUT CAROL: “That woman, she’s a force of nature.) I don’t think I really understood the power behind the eyes in the midst of television until I saw this episode. I can’t find the gif, but I’m sure most of you who’re reading this know what I’m talking about. 

- last day on earth**: again this episode shifts between perspectives as TF is trying to get Maggie to Hilltop for her pregnancy complication, but Melissa is stellar here. Carol doesn’t want to love because if she loves, she has to kill, and she attempts to manipulate one of the survivors from the massacre into doing what she can’t: taking her own life. She just wants to go, and Morgan won’t let her. This one is a bit darker, and the episode as a whole is not my favorite, but it’s definitely up there in my favorite performances for Melissa. 

season 7 

- the well: if there was ever an episode that would show you that Melissa aces comedy, it was this one. This is meant to be an introductory to The Kingdom, but the hilarity behind the way Carol talks to Ezekiel is so entertaining. It’s kind of hard to believe she ends up marrying the man (we’re not going into shipper discourse here, friends) but this one also shows you something through Carol’s eyes: The differences between people and walkers and her desire not to kill. She wants to hide, and she does. 

- new best friends: Daryl lies to Carol about what happened in the clearing with Negan. This one is so so heartfelt. It’s deeply intimate. It showcases two people who’d move heaven and earth to ensure the safety of the other, both physical and mental and emotional. Norman and Melissa aced this. I can’t say it more simply then that. 

- bury me here**: I love love love love love this episode. The entire thing is a metaphor, but I love it anyway. If I remember right, this is also the one where Morgan tells Carol about Glenn and Abraham. Remember what I said about the power behind a look? This is another instance in which Melissa shows she is the master of this. 

- carol spends alot of the time at the kingdom for the rest of the season and i cannot really remember any more memorable performances for this garbage, as they took my fave and reduced her to a side character for this and most of s8.

season 8 

- the only performance i will give any credit to in this season is 8x04, which is Some Guy. I barely remember the rest of it. Minus the moment where she finally saves a kid - Henry - instead of losing one. And a heartbreaking moment between her and Morgan that I also barely remember. Case in point, S8 was and still is garbage. 

season 9 

- 9x01-9x05 all have Carol in them because whenever Angela Kang took over the show, she had the brilliant idea to actually use her lead women as leads. Season 9 feels like an eternity ago and I can’t remember if she took over before or after AL signed off, but my point remains. Between Carol’s loyalty to Ezekiel because of Henry, (who she has now taken as her son), and their marriage, and her short stint as the leader of the Sanctuary as Negan is in confinement, there’s something in Carol here we haven’t seen in years. It’s something akin to peace, or as close as she’s gonna get to it. 9x03 and 9x04 (particularly the conversation b/t Rick and Carol) are my favorite of this cluster for her. 

- I almost dropped off after 9x05. I thought that was it, I thought that was gonna be where I ended. Nope. This woman - AK- took this show and made it what it had been and I’ll never be able to thank her enough for it. 

- Who Are You Now: I only remember this one because of the scene where Carol and Henry are in the carriage - side note: I really need to go back and rewatch this season again - but one of the things that caught my attention about the after of the bridge was how the relationships b/t parent and child are approached as significant. They’re not the future. The adults are building for the future of the kids. Michonne/Judith, Ezekiel/Henry and Carol/Henry. It’s sweet. Very sweet. 

- Stradivarius: this is a very Caryl heavy episode, but we find out something here: Even with being married to Ezekiel, Carol has still gone out to see Daryl where he resides by the same river that took Rick. Henry sees the relationship between him and his mother. It’s as obvious as the nose on your face. This one is just adorable. I love it. 

- The Calm Before**: Ow. OW OW OW OW OW. You want more pain? Here you go! Carol faces the dark truth as she crests the hill that holds her worst nightmare: Henry has died. She’s lost another kid. You wanna restrain yourself from breaking through the TV to comfort Carol for the umpteenth time as she breaks? Cool. That’s what you get here. 

- The Storm**: Split apart by the death of Henry, Carol and Ezekiel no longer remain married. She gives up that fairytale - one of the happiest she’d ever had - and begins wallowing in her suffering over the loss of her son. Heartbreak and grief do not come easily to her. They never have. Can you imagine being suffocated by things you’ve never talked about? Can you imagine having to live every day with your grief? Well, look here... that’s exactly what Carol does, and you want to know who her guiding force is? 

It’s Daryl. 

season 10 

- I remember when Season 10 aired, I watched the first episode in Kenya and loved it. I’d heard something about how PTSD was a BIG factor in the progression of the story throughout this season, and as someone who wants to go into mental health counseling, I was so intrigued by this that every single episode kept my eyes glued to the TV. Carol is the lead female now besides Michonne, but I’m gonna tell you every single favorite episode of mine anyway. 

- Ghosts: Carol makes a mistake and fires at Alpha when they meet her at the border. She wears a mask that’s so composed it’s almost hard to see the heartbreak beneath it, and that’s the point. She’s not considering her life. She’s considering vengeance for the life that was taken. This is a constant circle for her. Alot of people are tired of this arc and I get it, I do. But the difference between this one and the three seasons previous is that we’re meant to get to a resolution now. This episode broke my heart. Especially the last scene in the gym. 

- Bonds: Another Caryl heavy episode. I love this one. It’s very lighthearted compared to the rest of the season. 

- Open Your Eyes**: This one is utterly terrifying and eerily reminiscent of the one in S2 where Daryl interrogates Randall. Carol, having just brought back a Whisperer from her escapade with Daryl, interrogates him to find out the location of Alpha’s horde without any real consideration for the people around her. She also uses Lydia for her own personal gain, and I’m not gonna lie - Even though this one is one of my favorites because of Avi Nash (WHO WAS SUCH A GOOD ADDITION TO THE SHOW I LOVED HIM AS SIDDIQ) This episode made me so angry because of Carol’s motives. 

-  The World Before**: And when I said I was angry, this episode turned it all into heartbreak. This one remains one of my favorite of the show and of Carol for one very specific reason: The scene in the woods between her and Daryl. 

As someone who has never done grieving well, this scene hit me so. hard. She’s so set on this path of vengeance and blood that she’s neglecting a very real truth that she has never done well: talking about her burdens, talking about the pain and if she does that, if she acknowledges it, then she will hurt. 

- Squeeze: I don’t have to talk about this. I just have to show you. 

Ow. Please, please let her heal. I’m so tired of seeing her hurt. 

- 10x11 and 10x12 don’t really have Carol, and neither does 10x13, but she’s there. We see her a couple of times, we have a conversation or two. Let me get to the penultimate moment. One we’ve waited for years to see and which next week will give us the rest of. 

- LOOK AT THE FLOWERS*****: You can be a Carol fan for five minutes or five years and still somehow managed to love her MORE after watching this one. There’s a couple reasons why this one is probably in my top 3 for both Melissa and Carol as a whole. 

1. I have waited years to see Negan meet Carol. JDM has made it very clear how he feels about MMB and I knew, I knew, that once this interaction happened I would not be disappointed. I should’ve realized she was the one who let Negan out, but I didn’t. That entire first scene is gold. 

2. This entire episode is just.. art. The fact that Carol’s darker side takes the form of the being of her hatred - Alpha - is fitting, and it’s also the first time we’ve really gotten an actual dialogue about multiple things that have formed her character for the last several seasons: The Grove, the loss of Sophia, Ed... It’s heartbreaking to see because she keeps telling herself pushing people away is better, it’s better to be alone because there’s no one to burden, and the darker side of her asks a very simple question: What do you want? 

Her answer is clear, at least to her. I want to be alone. But the fact that the darker part of her, the one that keeps calling out on Connie, doesn’t agree. No. There’s something deeper. Something she’s too afraid to acknowledge. 

3. That whole final scene. Wow. I’ve watched it like four times because Samantha Morton is just so good as Alpha, as Carol’s dark counterpart, trying to mock and taunt her into doing the one thing she never was able to do herself: Dying. This episode is dark because of this realization. “Look at the flowers’’ is akin to ‘’It’ll all be over soon.” but instead of choosing death, instead  of choosing the one thing that would let it be over, she chooses life. She essentially chooses to fight for herself which she has not done in YEARS. The minute she acknowledges that it’s never too late (FOR WHAT?? HM??) the demons disappear. I think that this point into 10x15 will give us two things that every Carol fan is desperate for: Healing for Carol (FINALLY!), and a resolution to this endless arc of suffering. 

Also... Why do we think that Daryl is the one who ends up welcoming her home? Why is he the one who opens the gate? 

Long story short: I love this character. I love Melissa McBride as she is one of the most down-to-earth, humble and compassionate actresses in Hollywood. It’s a shame she’s not gonna be recognized by The Academy because if ever there was an actor/actress on this show to win, it’d be her.