#if only for those fucking ASKS jfc

[ohbo-ohno]

omgomgomgomggggg u mentioned reader locked in a cage watching her stuffed bear through the bars and my mind immediately started racing. do u think when they have her locked up they sit just outside the bars teasing her with her stuffed bear shaking him around just outside her reach? taunting her and cooing when tears slide down her cheeks😭they throw a blanket over ur cage and leave u there for “puppy’s nap time” i’m actually shaking

oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my

this is a little long one because both of these concepts have killed me and i lost control of myself

im shaking. hyperventilating. quivering. i am an unrecognizable person after reading these asks.

forced into a cage fucking GETS ME!!! noncon puppy play you will always be famous. both of my noncon/dubcon ghostsoap puppyplay things (say that five times fast) have johnny falling into a type of subspace really quickly so i haven't actually gotten to write a lot of a forced puppy reacting badly and i want to so MUCH!!! might do it with ghostsoap in a follow up to the thing i just posted honestly. it's so fucking delicious

but anyways. in this au the cage you get shoved in isn't johnny's cage, it's one they made for you so you can keep them company during their murderous free time. that means the cage is small, you-sized :( you can't sit up straight in it, can't stretch your legs out the whole way, can't even really kneel straight up. a tiny little space for a tiny little girl oh im going to be SICK

i like the idea of reader having a little nest of her own in their cabin, filled with soft things for her to relax into (and, of course, a hook for them to leash her to) so i feel like her cage in the basement is probably a little ugly. probably no blankets or pillows, shoved in the middle of the room somewhere so there's no place where you can hide (aka press yourself against the wall), leaves you exposed and vulnerable and cold. poor little puppy :( crying and sniffling and begging them not to force you in, but they just chuckle and ruffle your hair a bit, force you to your knees.

all that being said: your little bear johnny and bear simon are in the bad cage with you <3

the stuffy (im calling it a bear but fill in an animal if you'd like) is a total comfort object for you, something that has gone through every bad thing right by your side. when they fuck you, you almost always have the bear in your arms. when they force you to their torture dungeon, the bear is either in your arms or in your eyeline. maybe one of the times they hunt you simon slips the little bear into your arms while johnny is fucking you in the dirt, smirks a little when you thank him and hold it tight to your chest.

if you get really worked up from what they're doing one of them throws an old blanket over your cage. it makes everything so much worse - you can't see anything, you're left alone in this cold dark space, and you can still hear every sound of pain and the tools your kidnappers are using. but for some reason you feel more vulnerable in the dark (like a bird lol) so you go quiet, hunch down real low and squeeze your eyes shut so you can't see the bloodstains on the blanket. simon on johnny think they're helping you cause you don't sound nearly as scared when you can't see anything <3 gives them horrible ideas involving blindfolds but that's another thing

johnny keeping your bear from you. it's like the two of you want me dead. “do you wanna come out now?🥺” “you want your bear??🥺” “are you gonna be a good girl now???🥺🥺” and "teasing her with her stuffed bear shaking him around just outside her reach? taunting her and cooing when tears slide down her cheeks" like im so fucking GONE it's actually not even funny.

you get real puppy-like when they make you beg for your bear. little paws held out, eyes all big and teary, panting and wiggling around cause you want your toy so badly. simon telling you to take the stuffy with your teeth, and you whine because you don't want to bite your bear!!!! but he says johnny and i bite you all the time, puppy, if you can take it so can your bear so you finally lean forward, get a little loose hold on the stuffy's leg where johnny's holds it out

but he's so mean, because he doesn't let it go :( just smiles real big at the sight of you on your knees, little puppy toy between your teeth. go on, he'd say take it, lass. and you try!!! you tug it a little, shake your head a bit, but he won't let go!! he won't give you your bear!!!

until simon tells him to, a gruff that's enough tug o' war, johnny, she's been a good girl. hand it over. and then the stuffy is yours again, finally. you'd tuck it up right in your arms, hold it close to your chest and bury you nose in the soft fur with your eyes squeezed shut. you ignore the little coos from above you, fully throw yourself into loving on your bear

[asmodeusamaryllis]

Man idk the argument about hvy being a Chinese company and so they're restricted on having characters with dark skin tones when dislyte is ALSO a Chinese company and they typically are really good at representing the culture they take from for their characters makes it somewhat mute

[cosmic-ships]

imagine gatekeeping

Imagine setting boundaries so you have a safe space for yourself.

Block button is free. <3

[mrsmarlasinger]

My manager at the call center isn't gonna be here for the rest of the week. Nor is our office manager. I'm gonna throw up. Like I'm literally nauseous with dread

[f1byjessie]

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS ━━ LN4.

sometimes the right words are hard to come across, and sometimes everything you need to say can be captured in an image.

( lando norris x photographer!reader )

━━ part three.

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yourusername is it time for bahrain yet?! can’t wait to see these two back in action again soon! 🧡

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mclaren We keep asking ourselves the same thing! Our engines are ready and we’re raring to go! 🧡

↳ yourusername you truly understand me mclaren admin

↳ mclaren we think you’re the one who truly understands us y/n

↳ user y/n x mclaren admin?? 🤯 the plot twist none of us saw coming

user missing these lads so much lately

user THE RADIO SILENCE ON OSCAR’S SOCIALS WAS KILLING ME I DEPEND ON THESE MEN TOO MUCH THEY KEEP ME ALIVE 😭😭

user the f1 drought is real rn

user MCLAREN SUPREMACY 2024

↳ user i’m trying to be delulu but we all know it’s just gonna be the mv33 and redbull show again this year 🫤

user soooo are we all just gonna pretend like we didn’t see the pics of her with garrett ward orrrrr?

↳ user no bc i was just thinking the same thing 👀

↳ user wait that was actually her??? cuz you can like barely see her face so i thought it was just a joke???

user what a fake ass bitch

user she only posts other ppl on her acc cuz she knows her ugly ass face would scare everyone else away

user homegirl needs to stay tf away from my man fr 😤😤

user god what a hoe 😒 she already has these two that she could fuck with idk why she needed to go after garrett

user SLUT SLUT SLUT

user if she tries anything with anyone else on the city team i’m gonna lose my shit fr

↳ user same omg

↳ user honestly i’m just glad she didn’t go after grealish or haaland 🙌

↳ user she probably would’ve tried if they weren’t taken already 🙄

↳ user nah i bet she’s totally a homewrecker garrett’s probably just the first on her list

user oh… these comments… 😰

↳ user right???

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yourusername the city boys know how it’s done! and looking pretty good in orange too 😉

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mancity The lads are looking good indeed! This weekend’s match against Newcastle should be an exciting one! ⚽️🩵

mclaren ✍️ Jeremy ✍️ Doku ✍️ and ✍️ Ruben ✍️ Dias ✍️ McLaren ✍️ 2025

↳ mancity Do you think Lando Norris and Oscar Piastri would look good in sky blue? 🤔

user funny how she posts every city man BUT garrett

user god when does she go back to f1??

↳ user march iirc

↳ user well it can’t get here soon enough jfc

user FUCK OFF WE DON’T WANT YOU

user you’re a slag and should accept the fact that any guy would only want you bc of how easy you are

user i’ll bet my left leg that the only reason the f1 boys haven’t shacked up with her yet is cuz they know she’s probably riddled with disease since she drools over every guy that comes near her 😒 like girl needs to bffr and realize that throwing herself at every male in her vicinity isn’t gonna land her a husband and it just making her even more of a slut

↳ user nah i’ll bet they’ve all already done her over in f1 but nobody will touch her now that they’ve passed her round so she had to come over to football just to try and get someone to touch her again 🙄🙄🙄

user i hope garrett realizes how much of a slut she is and breaks up with her

user sick and tired of bitches like this getting with footballers and being all controlling. like i’ll bet she’s gonna tell garrett he can’t go out and party with his mates anymore bc he has to spend time in with her and then she’ll get all pissy about him having female fans bc she’s insecure and knows that if garrett got to meet a REAL fan he’d jump ship immediately. those of us who ACTUALLY care about footballers know their fans are super important to them and we wouldn’t hinder their relationship with them just bc we’re jealous or insecure. garrett needs to be with someone who actually supports him and is willing to let him do what he wants instead of controlling him like he’s a dog on a leash.

user kys like genuinely

user god i can’t wait for this skank to die 😒

“Hey Lando, it’s me. Your best friend. Again,” you give a humorless chuckle. “I could seriously use some of your wizened advice right about now, so, uh, please just give me a call back when you can. Thanks.”

It seems poetic in a cruel sort of way that less than a week ago you were walking Etihad Campus and feeling like you were on top of the world━ working a new albeit temporary gig, adding the Manchester City name to your list of clients, having photos of world-renowned footballers in your portfolio━ and now you’ve resigned yourself to hiding away in the women’s restroom, locked in a stall because it’s the only place you could think of where nobody would be able to find you.

You’re on the verge of tears and feeling rather stupid for it.

It’s the third time today alone that your call has gone straight to voicemail, and with the dozens of unread texts you’ve sent in the last week added to the mix, it’s starting to paint a picture you’re not very happy with. Lando is ignoring you. Or he’s blocked you. Or he’s blocked you because he’s ignoring you━

You bite down on your lip, hard, to keep back the sob crawling its way up your throat.

You’re not a PR officer, you hadn’t been lying when you told Garrett that, but you’ve spent enough time around the McLaren PR teams that you’ve picked up enough tips and tricks to know, at the very least, that the best thing you can do is just ignore the comments.

That’s what they tell all the athletes.

What they don’t tell the athletes is that ignoring the comments is much easier said than done, especially when your career requires you to have such a significant online presence. And the thing is, despite all of these strangers hounding you with every name under the sun and criticizing your capabilities, qualifications, and very existence, the thing that hurts the most is the radio silence from the only person you know could make it all better.

Now, more than ever, you need your best friend. But he isn’t here.

You tuck your phone into your jacket pocket and unlock the stall with great reluctance. You know better than to be hiding away, shirking your responsibilities while crying over a few missed phone calls. You have a job to do, and a real professional wouldn’t let something as simple as a handful of tasteless comments get in the way of that.

You should be used to them. It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.

Your first month at McLaren wasn’t entirely different.

When you were first hired on, Carlos had been in Formula One for a handful of years already and had built up a devotedly loyal fanbase with a decently large percentage of possessive fangirls who had come for your head the moment your existence had been announced.

The McLaren Instagram account had posted a picture of you standing between their two grinning drivers, your camera strung around your neck, with a very nice caption welcoming you to the team, and despite no indication that you were by any means involved with either of them in a way that went beyond professional, the comments had been taken over by feral teenage girls who saw the act of you simply standing near Carlos to be a direct threat against their “chances.”

Though it had been frustrating being met with childish threats and petty insults in your comments, you hadn’t really held it against any of them. You remember being a teenage girl and crushing on a celebrity. Deep down you knew you never had a chance with them, but that hadn’t stopped you from hanging posters in your bedroom and doodling their name beneath yours inside of scribbled hearts in your diary.

Regardless, it had taken close to a month for the negativity to die down, and you hadn’t had Lando then, either, so now shouldn’t be much different.

In fact, everyone on the Manchester City team━ trainers, physios, media coordinatiors, and anyone inbetween━ has been very polite about everything between you and Garrett. A lot of them have just avoided saying anything about it, which you’re very grateful for because you don’t think you’d be able to hold back your grimace while thanking them for their well wishes, and the few who have mentioned it typically only say something vague like a wishing you the best of luck or hoping you’re happy.

An intern gave you a sympathetic smile the other day, and you’d nearly burst into tears in the middle of the office of the Director of Communications, so you know you aren’t truly alone in this.

You just feel alone.

Exiting the bathroom is a simple affair. There’s no one standing post outside ready to give you any shit for being hidden away, and nobody comes sprinting around the corner as you make your way down the hall to the press conference room that’s been temporarily turned into your base of operations.

You think you’ll probably be able to go the rest of the afternoon without running into anyone, when you open your door and find━ sitting in the front row of the seats typically saved for journalists and the press, scrolling across his phone with a disinterested look painted across his face━ Jack Grealish.

“Jack,” you greet, a bit shocked. You close the door to the room gently behind you, and cross the distance to your desk. “Did we have a meeting scheduled? It must’ve completely slipped my mind, I sincerely apologize.”

He offers you a polite smile. “No, we didn’t, so no need to be sorry. I actually just wanted to check in. See how things are going with everything.”

You blink at him in surprise. Apart from Garrett, you haven’t really had much time to speak with the other players. They wish you good morning and good afternoon when they see you, and if a ball goes astray they always call out for you to watch your head, but between their morning training and their afternoon training, their strategy reviews at lunch, and the frequent in between meetings with physios, nutritionists, and trainers, they don’t get much time to chit chat with a simple photographer.

You clear your throat, “Erm, it’s going well. I’ve gotten some really good shots these past few days. There’s one with Rodrigo that I’m particularly proud of. It should do well with the fans.”

“And things with Ward?”

You purse your lips.

“Figured.” Jack sighs. “Look, nearly everyone you run into here knows or has at least some inkling into what he’s like. He’s a prick. None of the lads on the team like him, it’s why the managers are trying to get him out of here.”

You lower yourself down into your chair. “He told me they were planning to trade him off because of his reputation.”

Jack scoffs, “Yeah, ‘cause that’s the ‘official’ reason. They can’t cut his contract early for legal reasons, so they’re waiting for it to expire and coming up with an excuse for why they ain’t re-signing him. It’s really just ‘cause the rest of us can’t keep dealing with his massive ego and the fact that he’s a misogynistic fuck who doesn’t know the first thing about respect.”

“Fucking tell me about it,” you mutter with a sigh.

If he expected you to defend Garrett and is surprised by the fact that you haven’t, Jack doesn’t show it. He looks relaxed sitting across from you, like you’re having a casual conversation and not actively shit talking a member of his team. It gives you the impression that he knows significantly more about Garrett than you do, and that because of what he knows he probably figured out that one party in the relationship is not the most willing of participants.

“How’d you get all wrapped up it in then? Didn’t figure you to be the type to go after pricks like Ward.”

You debate over whether you should tell him or not. There isn’t much Jack can do about the situation regardless, but it would at least get things off your chest and if someone else knew then maybe you wouldn’t feel so alone anymore.

There’s only so many days you can spend hiding out in the women’s restroom trying not to bawl your eyes out, and you’ve already reached your limit.

You heave a sigh, “It’s kind of fucked up really.” A pen on your desk catches your attention and you start to fiddle with it, avoiding Jack’s eyes which have focused directly onto you. “He asked if I would help him fix up his reputation by pretending to be his girlfriend so he could show everyone that he’s matured and can hold down a steady relationship. When I told him no, he threatened to make up a lie about inappropriate conduct to get me fired and blacklisted from the industry, so for the sake of preserving my career I agreed.”

“Bloody fucking hell,” Jack murmurs, shaking his head. “I’m real sorry he did that, Y/N.”

You shrug. “It’s happened, so, there’s nothing I can really do except wait it out at this point.”

When you look up and meet his gaze, Jack looks murderous. His hands are clenched into fists on the armrests, knuckles white with the strength of his grip. His brows are furrowed, and his lips are twisted downward in a scowl.

“If you need anything,” he starts, “let me know. And I mean it. We all know how Ward can be. He’s a knobhead. So if you need anything━” his emphasis on the word and what that implies makes you feel more comforted than anything has since the whole fiasco started, “━then you let me know, or you tell one of the other boys and they’ll find me, alright?”

All you can do is nod.

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yourusername there’s no place like home

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━━ tags: @maih23 @urfavnoirette @leclercsluv @f1luvur @formulaal @a-disturbing-self-reflection @starlightpierre @chezmardybum @marshmummy @405rry

━━ a/n: no lando yet, but we've got a cutesy little grealish scene to make up for it because i couldn't have a story with manchester city and not include him! lowkey writing this part made me wanna write for a footballer too... anyways! hope you all enjoy!

[ohnococo]

Fight Night | MMA Fighter!Sukuna x Reader

“You know why you’re here. You can take it or leave it.” His hand pushes its way higher up between your thighs until his fingers meet your panties, rubbing against your pussy as he squeezes your flesh. His smile at having confirmed you were just as wet as he knew you were is absolutely wicked and your pussy is practically fluttering with the way he looks at you. He dips his head even lower to graze his teeth along your neck, hot breath followed by an even hotter tongue licking a playful path. “You seem like you can take it, though.”

You weren't familiar with Infamous MMA Fighter Ryomen 'The King' Sukuna when he entered the club, but he certainly wants to become familiar with you.

Warnings: public sex, slight exhibitionism, size difference bordering on size kink, Sukuna has a monster hog that's pierced, fingering, creampie, rough sex, reader doesn't realize there's a voyeur present.

Notes: Based off of the AU in this post.

Only an hour and a half into your night and things had already gotten interesting.

You’re among the many heads stretched and straining to see what the hell the commotion was about, or rather who it’s about. The staff cutting back and forth through the crowd had only been noticed by a few. The dozen people walking in at once had garnered a bit more attention. Then, the absolutely massive guy that followed them, moving into the centre of the entourage, gathered even more attention. You don’t even know who he is, but the most annoying guys in your immediate vicinity all seem like they’ve just seen God himself enter the club, shouting to each other about him winning something big, followed by drunken recountings of what was apparently a fight. He’s flanked by a sizeable group of men and if he weren’t fucking huge you’d assume most of the entourage were bodyguards from the way they part the crowd to allow him through unhindered. With the way people nearest to them were pointing and smiling he was apparently recognizable to enough people here. You weren’t among those people, but your interest was piqued nonetheless.

You can hardly see him at this distance, but you reckon he must be over 6’5” with the way he’s head and shoulders above everyone. You can’t quite discern his features but he looks like he’s scanning the crowd, only pausing for a moment to lean down before he makes his way to his own area, accompanied by his own small crowd. The glass balustrades allow you to watch him as he goes past the bouncer unquestioned and up the stairs to the VIP section. Even when he’s out of view the feel of the room has shifted entirely, mark effectively left on the place.

Your eyes had been so intent on him you hadn’t noticed the person who’d broken off from his entourage until they’re in front of you and waving a hand at you before leaning in to shout and be heard over the music.

“Do you party?”

What the fuck did they think you were doing? Dress held onto your body by a hope and a prayer, eyes glassy, pupils blown, and this stranger was being coy? Maybe you would be too.

“Maybe. Who’s asking?” They were too young for you, having that awkward ‘are they 19 or 30’ appearance. They were too small too, but you’d seen them trailing along behind the big guy with their fuck ass bob and knew exactly who it really was asking from the way they were looking at you like another errand.

They point up to the balcony, speaking with a reverence coated in the assumption that you’d be impressed, “The King.”

“Who?”

“You’re joking?” They look offended, like they might rescind the offer that hadn’t yet been made, but you knew it wasn’t their choice to come over here, it was this King’s.

You shrug. “I don’t watch boxing.”

“He’s not a boxer.” They spit out the word, boxer, like it had been an insult. “He’s the reigning heavyweight champion of JFC.”

Your laugh at the name has them dumbfounded, explaining even though you couldn’t look more unphased by his apparent celebrity.

“Jujutsu Fighting Championship?” They say it like it explains everything. Like it meant anything more than anyone else’s accolade’s in terms of you having a good night.

“Does this King have a real name? Or just a pretend one?”

“Ryomen Sukuna, and he’d like to invite you up to the VIP lounge. Do you want to go or not?”

You did. You knew you didn’t get up there without spending an exorbitant amount on bottle service, and having the additional funds to beat out anyone else looking to enjoy its amenities. Besides, you knew you weren’t going to turn down free drinks and maybe a story for tomorrow. So you put on a coy smile, indicating that you’d play nice for the opportunity.

“Sure.”

The way they take off, cutting through the crowd at a brisk pace, keeps you on your toes as you try to follow along, pushing against people as you do - some dancing, some looking up at the balcony above and hoping for another peek at the man you were just about to meet.

Once you’re in front of the bouncer at the bottom of the stairs, your temporary escort is annoyed at having to give their name, huffing out a curt “Uraume.” as the man slowly looks through his clipboard, stepping aside once satisfied.

You’re just as quick to keep up when going up the stairs too, trying to look casual as you finally enter the VIP lounge, scanning the room as though your attention wouldn’t automatically be brought to the giant man seated near the wall. Uraume gives a nod to the man, and you’re surprised to see he returns it with a friendly smile, though any trace of warmth is soon gone as they then settle into a corner and The King turns his attention to you as you approach.

Looking at him up close it’s obvious he’s a fighter, you don’t know how you hadn’t immediately guessed it even from seeing him across the club even before people around you started mentioning fights and belts and such. Besides him being built, he has dyed hair that’s a faded colour usually seen among those showy men you meet around Vegas, uniquely employed enough to opt for bolder styles yet dedicated enough to training to let it fade ever so slightly. Nevermind the prominent tattoos on his face, neck, and disappearing down beneath his shirt. Eccentric appearance and fucking huge typically meant one thing around here: fighter. Or wannabe fighter, usually, but with the handles of liquor and nervous energy of the staff that had been rushing around since he’d arrived you knew for sure he wasn’t just some wannabe. From the look of his entourage he might not be just a fighter either.

Well, at least he was handsome.

The only seat available is right next to the man himself. He’s cross legged with his arm draped over the back of the leather couch - over the space you were presumably going to be sitting in. You imagine him instructing his goons to leave it free and feel slightly flattered, not too flattered though as you’re sure it’s a regular occurrence given his apparent popularity.

“Aw, no one wanted to sit next to you?” You give him a teasing pout and he laughs, loud and booming and rich, and you feel everyone around you relax collectively. He liked you up close too, and the feeling was mutual as he pats his lap.

“You can sit here if you prefer.”

Cheeky, you want to get a feel for him first though, so you sit next to him instead. “Buy me a drink first.”

He gestures to the table in front of you, littered with bottles. You look over them, considering your choice carefully. When he puts a hand on your upper thigh and leans into you, brushing his nose against your neck and bypassing any pretence of what he’d invited you up here for, you decide your tastes are a little more expensive. At least when it comes to playing with him.

“No Dom Perignon?”

The way his hand squeezes your thigh has you wondering if he was mad that you were taking advantage. The hungry look he flashes when he leans back to look you up and down lets you know he didn’t care as long as you both got something out of tonight. He glances over to a man who had been standing in wait for his every word, and he skitters off to make it happen.

You feign having only a passing interest in him while you wait, looking at him with brows raised, appraising him as he must have done to you when he’d entered the club. “So you’re supposed to be famous, right?”

Famous, you say it with a slight dry singsong that indicates as dazzling of an occurrence as meeting a celebrity might be, you weren’t quite so dazzled. He raises a brow in amusement, still rubbing at your thigh in a heavy reminder that you both knew why he’d called you up.

“Not famous enough, apparently.” He doesn’t seem nearly as perturbed by your ignorance of him as his small companion had. In fact, it doesn’t seem to phase him at all.

“So are you good at fighting?”

He makes no attempt to stop his cocky grin, and a predatory look flashes in his eyes as he seems to reflect on his own skill. “Yes.”

The staff sent off earlier returns with a bottle and glass, making a show of presenting it to you before opening it. As he does, Ryomen puts a finger on your chin, turning your attention back to him.

“I fought tonight, actually.”

“Oh?” As soon as his hand is off your face and back on your thigh, you turn back to the man pouring your drink, reaching out to accept the glass before he rests the bottle in a bucket of ice and returns to his spot near enough to be at Sukuna’s call.

“I put a man in the hospital.”

You sit back, taking a sip of the champagne as he puts his heavy arm over your shoulder, pulling you closer into him. You take in his expression carefully. Wasn’t that the point of fighting? You deduce that maybe he’d gone a bit further than was typical from the way he looks at you though. There was a sense of pride in the way he’d said it, a sense of satisfaction, even as the smallest flash of his narrowing eyes hinted at it being a warning.

“Does that scare you?” He looks as though he might just love it if the answer were yes.

You cross one leg over the other, trapping his large hand between your thighs, as you finish your drink in one long sip. Maybe it was a waste, but it wasn’t your money. “Should it?”

He dips his head low until your faces are close, and the size difference is enough that it’s as if he’s closing you off from the room as he does it, giving you a false sense of privacy as his lips meet yours. You’re surprised at the pacing of his kiss. It’s far from gentle, but slow, languid, and even if you weren’t ready for it to deepen you’d have had no chance of denying his tongue entry as he pushes it into your mouth. Happily, you match his intensity, opening yourself to him as he explores your mouth. His teeth catch at your bottom lip, nipping hard enough to keep you from getting too lost in the feel of his lips on yours, even as the tinge of pain has your pussy clenching.

When the arm draped around your shoulders slides further round so he can shove his hand into your top you arch into him, thighs squeezing his right hand tighter as he slides the heavy fingers of his left across your nipple playfully. You’re snapped back to reality only slightly when you feel the empty glass being pulled from your hand, glancing to the side even as you keep kissing him to see one of his entourage setting it down on the table in front of you before taking a place standing against the wall, staring out and over the balcony at the crowd below as if there were truly nothing to see here.

Sukuna rolls your nipple between two of his thick fingers, pulling your full attention back onto him. You bring your now freed hand to his head, tangling your fingers in his hair as you tilt your head back and lean further into his touch. Between the tightness of the fabric across your chest and the sheer size of his hands, he’s quickly tired of being so restricted in touching you, pulling his hand out and tugging the top of your dress down to free your breasts as he resumes his teasing. You pull back, having to turn your head away entirely to stop the chase of his lips as you pull your dress back up.

“Whoa-“ you haven’t even moved your hand from your chest before his much larger hand is covering yours, squeezing tightly but not moving to expose you again. There’s a slight warning in his touch, even if he’s smiling at you, bemused by your sudden modesty even as he broadcast to you clear as day that this was precisely what he’d had you brought up here for.

“You’re cute.” The way he says it doesn’t quite feel like a compliment, it feels more like he’s calling you a brat with a bow on it. The fact that it only makes you wetter isn’t lost on you though. “Don’t play with me too much, though.”

He’s moving the ball into your court, making sure you know that you weren’t up here just to get drunk and look pretty. He watches as you consider how much you want to do in front of these people, how much you want to show, and sighs, growing bored already. You asserted a boundary, so he’d assert his in no uncertain terms. Whether that was acceptable was up to you.

“You know why you’re here. You can take it or leave it.” His hand pushes its way higher up between your thighs until his fingers meet your panties, rubbing against your pussy as he squeezes your flesh. His smile at having confirmed you were just as wet as he knew you were is absolutely wicked and your pussy is practically fluttering with the way he looks at you. He dips his head even lower to graze his teeth along your neck, hot breath followed by an even hotter tongue licking a playful path. “You seem like you can take it, though.”

The shiver that runs through you as he uncrosses your legs with one hand and pulls your panties to the side with his thumb has him chuckling against your neck while he begins sucking marks into the sensitive skin. His fingers are as rough as you’d guessed as he slides them through your wetness and your eyes shut as you melt into his touch. He’s skilled, teasing you enough to have you angling your hips up for more, pushing one of his thick fingers in just before you’re lost in the sensation enough to whine for it. Once you clench around it he wastes no time, adding a second before digging deep and sliding calloused fingertips over the spot that has you tugging at his hair.

Suddenly, his fingers withdraw, and he pulls your legs open wide, laying one over his lap to give him better access to you. Your eyes snap open as the momentary loss of contact brings you back to your senses enough to remember you were surrounded by a dozen strangers. You tense and snap your legs back shut, and Sukuna sighs again.

“They don’t care what we do.”

Still, having your pussy spread wide in the direct line of sight of strangers was just crossing the line tonight, so you pull away from him slightly and glance around the room to reaffirm your boundary.

He looks you up and down, and for a moment you think he might actually send you away to finish the night with the masses, wetness still smeared along your thighs. It was clear he could have someone more willing up here in a heartbeat. Instead, his lips curl into a smile, and it both unsettles you and makes your pussy clench.

“Go dance.” His eyes hadn’t left yours as he said it, but it was clear it was an order to everyone but you despite the fact that he hadn’t said it to anyone in particular. The crowd in the room moves at once - getting up, grabbing drinks as they go, and leaving the two of you alone. Your eyes are still locked on his, held captive by the intensity of his gaze, heart beating faster and faster as people filter past and down the stairs.

“Better?”

In lieu of an answer you slide your panties partially off, leaving them bunched around one ankle as you climb onto his lap, straddling him. He slides his hands up your thighs and cups your ass, letting his fingers sink into your flesh before deciding he’d have your tits out just as he’d wanted earlier. He tugs your dress down enough to give him the view he’d wanted, then pushes your dress up from the bottom as well to give him better access and you let him do as he pleases at both ends, wrapping your arms around his thick neck and kissing along his tattooed jaw. You settle yourself down onto his lap, starting to grind against him to get an idea of just how big his cock is, but he’s insistent on having his hand between the two of you, sliding his fingers back inside for you to ride them instead.

His thick knuckles catch at your entrance in a way that has your wetness leaking all the faster as the fucks them up into you, and once you’re grinding down to meet his movements he moves his other hand to the back of your head, keeping your lips pressed firmly against his. When his thumb starts stroking at your clit and you moan into his mouth he takes it as his cue to push a third finger into you, pace picking up as his fingers curl just right to add to the sensations he was pulling from you. They’re pushing so deep and fast that it almost distracts from the stretch as he spreads them each time he’s as deep as he can get. As the coil in you tightens, you try to break your endless kiss to warn him you’re close but find you’re held firmly in place. Not that it mattered how much of a mess you made of his lap at this point.

You’re so wet you know his pants must already be absolutely ruined, and as his tongue tangles with yours you realise that you still haven’t gotten a chance to sneak a feel at his cock, thanks to his hand between the two of you. You want to see it, feel it before you cum on it, taste it even, as you become keenly aware of how desperate you are to have it in your mouth. It’s as if his attitude had made you want to match his cockiness, it had made you competitive, and you want to knock him down a peg with your tongue, your mouth, your throat.

As you try again to pull away you have to dig your nails into his shoulders to stop him from kissing you, he was large enough, and hungry enough, that you couldn’t evade him otherwise. When you lock eyes he looks annoyed, tired of any further delays.

“Get your cock out.”

Your words have his eyes sparkling, and he flashes you another wicked grin that only makes you absolutely desperate to feel him in your throat.

He pulls his fingers from you and slides you down just enough to sit atop his knees as he makes quick work of both button and zip with one hand as the other hand stays tightly gripping your ass to hold you in place. He pulls his cock out from where it rests hard and heavy across his hip within his pants, stroking it with an iron grip as he looks into your eyes, gaze nearly as intimidating as the thing in front of you as he revels in your reaction at seeing its size.

It is, to your awe and slight horror, perfectly proportional to the rest of his massive frame. Thick, heavy, with a fat head almost flushed red and veins rippling along the girthy shaft. The steel beads of the piercings trailing down underneath his length glimmer in the dim lighting of the room and add an extra amount of flair and fright to the honest to god mean appearance of such an intimidating cock. He squeezes at the base and when he releases it it flops back against his stomach, unable to stand with all of its weight. As much as your mouth is watering, you know your limits. Gone are your hopes of taking it to the base, watching him marvel at disappearing into your throat - and sucking on the head while you jerk him off wasn’t exactly what you’d pictured.

“Too much for you?”

The words, filled with mockery, pull your gaze back up to his, and he looks so very smug when you let out a less-than-confident, “No.”

“Well?” He wasn’t going to let that weak answer stand, pressing at you and enjoying the falter in your face from just how greedily you’d asked him to get it out just a moment ago.

“I just don’t know if I can suck that.”

Your honesty delights him, and his cock jumps slightly as he tenses from laughter. “I’m not asking you to. I didn’t stretch that cunt open for nothing.”

He pulls you closer with the hand gripping your ass, and slides three fingers back inside you unceremoniously. They had indeed gone in with much more ease than they had several minutes ago, and he begins pumping them inside you again. With the way he was stirring you up you know the noises would have been absolutely obscene if not for the music, not that you would have cared what people hear at this point.

You really had wanted to show off for him, slurping, gagging, taking him to the base and looking up at him with tear streaked eyes. But he was a fucking monster and you’d just have to accept that loss, something relatively easy to do as his fingers are right back to stirring you up. Those thoughts of knocking him down a peg with your head game are long gone as you rock into his fingers, meeting his palm for some needed friction, and just when you get it he pulls his fingers out and rubs your slick along his shaft.

He clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth as if you were some servant, pulling your attention from his cock alone to his face as he gives you an order with a bemused expression. “Sit on it.”

With your pussy desperate to be full again, you’re in no position to delay the inevitable any longer, bracing yourself for your cunt to take what you weren’t sure your mouth could. He takes you licking your lips and rising higher onto your knees as accepting his order and spits on his hand, rubbing it over his cock to join the wetness that was already coating it. A few minutes ago you’d have questioned if that was necessary with how wet he’d gotten you. At this point you’d take what you can get, not that anything could stop you now.

He wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you forward and up until he can line the head of his cock up with your entrance. The thick head swirling through your wetness for only a moment is the last warning before he’s sinking you down onto him. He turns his attention to your chest as he does, sucking a nipple between his lips, latching onto as much of your breast as he can suck into his large mouth. He stops only once, half way, pumping up and into you a few times, helping coax your wetness down his shaft, before he’s pulling you down onto him completely, groaning once you’ve taken it all.

He releases your breast, tugging on your nipple with his teeth as he does, and that pain almost eclipses the absolute stretch of having him in your guts. It’s as if the wind has been knocked out of you, and you let out a few gasps as you try to clench and adjust to him. He chuckles, and the feel of his cock throbbing inside of you as he does has your thighs jumping, fingers digging into his pecs as you rock your hips slowly. His hand falls between the two of you, palm pressing at your abdomen, thumb swiping at your clit, coaxing you back into yourself.

“C'mon, where's all that fire now?”

’Just a second,’ you think, ’just give me one fucking second.’ You don’t say that, though, you can’t. Instead you let out the tiniest little stutter, a noise you’d have been mortified at if your brain weren’t so focused on the feel of being so completely stuffed full.

“Aw,” you open your eyes at this and see Sukuna donning a pout not unlike the one you’d given him upon entering meeting him, “didn’t think I’d break you before I’d even fucked you properly.”

Between his words and his thumb swiping insistently at your clit, something clicks and you bring your knees up, planting your heels on the couch for purchase as you start slowly moving up his length before seating yourself back down. You clench around him as you rise, letting out moans once you settle back on him and he wraps a hand around your jaw, pulling your face close to kiss you as you ride him.

“Mmm, there you go,” he nips at your lower lip before releasing your face to lean back, fully relaxed against the couch below as his thumb continues to lazily swipe at your clit.

He watches you moan, and tense, and struggle to ride to the very tip of his length before coming back down and rocking your hips. You feel him making his cock twitch inside of you when you stop riding, baring his teeth in a wicked smile at the moan it elicits from you. It’s not easy work to ride him, and he knows it. Even just being on his lap, he’s too big to ride with your knees comfortable on the couch. Nevermind adding the considerable length you have to work your way up without coming down too fast or hard.

Still, you give it your all, thighs shaking both exertion and the intensity of having him so deep. Your hands dig into his pecs as you watch him taking you in, eyes burning, biting at his own lip in what you think might be an attempt to stifle his own deep moans as you find your footing and begin riding him in earnest. His eyes flick down to your tits, watching them bounce, pushed together by the positioning of your arms and he begins rocking his hips up every so often. It’s just enough to have your tits bouncing harder, just enough to throw you off too - pussy quaking every time his hips snap up into yours with no warning. He watches your face again, laughing as frustration builds at him throwing off your pace even as he helps to build the pressure in your core.

You let loose a groan between your huffs and sighs of pleasure and dig your nails into his pecs, earning a thrust from below hard enough to send you toppling forward into his grasp. He holds you firmly in place, biting and sucking at the tits now in his face before he’s releasing them in lieu of pulling your mouth down onto his by the back of your neck. He matches the pace you’d set earlier, letting you rock your hips into his movements and think, just for a moment, that you still had some semblance of control.

“Cute…” he almost growls it into your mouth, and his lips curling into a smile against yours is the closest you get to a warning as he thrusts up into you at a pace too punishing for you to even begin to match.

You feel like a rag doll as he holds you chest to chest with him, wrapping his arm around your waist to pull you down and onto him. He’s fucking you hard enough you swear you can feel him in your chest, and his heavy balls slap at your ass with the speed and strength of his hips snapping against yours.

“Fuck…” it’s the most intelligible thing you can say at this point, and that has his cock throbbing inside of you as he bares his teeth at you in another of those wicked grins that have your stomach and pussy tightening in unison. All you can do is hold on to him, hands clutching to fistfuls of the fabric of his shirt as he uses your body, the fast approach of your orgasm seemingly incidental as he chases his own high.

He lets loose a noise just short of a roar as he fucks you so hard you begin to understand why he’d asked if you were scared of him earlier. Your brain feels like it’s threatening to break with the feel of him and the way the girth of him presses and slides against every inch of your pussy is the only thing anchoring you to your body. As he begins pumping you full of cum the slowing of his thrusts gives your cunt something to cling to once the pressure within you reaches a fever pitch and you cum, tensing, clawing at his chest as you resume riding him weakly for a just a moment through the rest of your orgasm.

He gives you a moment, as he takes his, enjoying fucking his cum up into you until you’re squirming. When you push at him he lifts you off of him, sliding you back onto the couch, and you’re far too spent to even worry about the cum dripping out of you and onto the likely expensive leather below. You catch your breath, body buzzing and barely aware of the man next to you idly waving his hand at the corner of the room as he tucks his cock back into his pants.

As someone emerges from the dark of the corner of the room you snap your legs shut and pull your dress in place, realising in horror that not everyone had been dismissed earlier. The very person who had annoyedly guided you here earlier then heads to the stairs, presumably to retrieve the rest of the entourage.

Sukuna leans forward, pulling the previously forgotten champagne from its resting place, filling your glass before bringing the bottle to his lips as he settles back into his seat. While you’re processing what the other person in the room had seen, sheepishly pulling your panties back up, he’s already past it, ready to continue his night as people filter back in, equally unphased.

“Drink up, the night’s still young.”

Through the embarrassment of having cum leaking out of you in a room full of strangers is a small excitement building, and you’re more pleased than you’d like to admit that you were apparently invited along to whatever this man had in mind for tonight.

CHAPTER 2

[genericpuff]

wait wait wait, regarding that Minthe post, you're telling me that Rachel literally wrote the character as having BPD.....and portrayed her as an abusive mean piece of shit??? WOW. fucking WOW. sorry for being so angry, but even if she "retconned" that - it's still so god damn disrespective. as someone who has BPD it hurts so much to see my mental illness villanised :(

ugh I'm so sorry pal. and I don't blame you for being angry about it, like I don't even have BPD and I'M fucking pissed LOL like I can understand why Rachel might have wanted to backtrack from that knowing fully well that Minthe's story wasn't gonna have a happy ending, but writing her with BPD in the first place and then BACKTRACKING from it as soon as she likely got heat for it (or just realized it wasn't a good look) isn't much better because it means now all she's done is written the stigmatized negative effects of BPD into her character without showing the more positive outlooks of healing and managing. Maybe that was doomed to happen considering Minthe is someone who doesn't get a happy ending in the myths, but it begs the question of why she'd write her with BPD to begin with because in hindsight it really does seem like she just wanted to use it as a way to make her "evil".

But like, when you read the actual episode, you can SEE the potential there for character growth, you can SEE that she's aware of her actions - but doesn't understand why she's "like that" which is a VERY common feeling among people with undiagnosed mental illnesses - but it was never meant to be.

Like jfc not only is it HEAVILY IMPLIED, but again, the episode is literally called "Splitting". And we see exactly that with Minthe, who can't seem to rationalize with herself that she messed up.

But... that leads me to another point that I failed to mention in that first ask response: she DIDN'T mess up. Like, yes, she messed up by escalating it to the point of slapping Hades, but it wasn't her fault that she didn't make it to her date with Hades. Whose fault was it?

Continuously throughout the first season we see Thetis being an awful influence who manipulates and gaslights Minthe. They're "friends", but it's clear Thetis does not have Minthe's best interests in mind. In this very scene we see Thetis manipulate Minthe and even attempt to get her so drunk that she won't be able to show up to her date. And then of course when that plan works and Minthe freaks out, Thetis spins it around on Minthe in a very passive-aggressive way.

But of course, the narrative has to find a way to turn this whole thing on Minthe being the bad guy. Hence we get the slap which shifts the focus entirely away from what led up to it back onto Hades who has, in a lot of ways, put her in a situation that she can't control. And of course, being in those kinds of situations does not help with mental health.

Like, sorry, I'm really going off here now, but... the slap happens in Episode 76.

When is it finally addressed again? Episode 103.

It took Rachel nearly THIRTY EPISODES to finally bring it back to Minthe, and in that time the reader has spent SEVERAL EPISODES reading about how sad and lonely Hades is, and about how cute and lovey he is with Persephone. The reader has not had ANY time to reflect on Minthe's circumstances, because it completely pivots away from her to focus on H x P as a sort of distraction from the fact that Minthe is a victim in her own right.

And when it DOES return to Minthe in 103, we get this harrowing reminder that her entire life is dependent on Hades-

And once again, here comes Thetis to the "rescue", reinforcing the negative feedback loop that Minthe is trapped in where she's put in unhealthy situations. She drags her to a bar and the whole time Minthe is not having fun because she's understandably still reeling from what happened.

Now we DO get some character development here, where Minthe realizes exactly what I've just finished explaining, that Thetis isn't her friend, that she'd rather not have Thetis as a friend than continue being talked down to and manipulated.

But then, as we know, because Rachel still needs Minthe to be the "bad guy", the breakup between Hades and Minthe winds up being all about Persephone from a POV that attempts to villainize Minthe for being "jealous" (rather than focusing on how shitty Hades actually is for having an emotional affair with Persephone to begin with) and then Minthe goes right back to hanging out with Thetis anyways for the sake of having the "evil other girl" who wants to "ruin" H x P's relationship.

It's not until Season 3 that we finally see Minthe tell Thetis to fuck off for good, but by then it's too little too late, and Minthe has lost an entire character arc. Rachel tries to go "see! Minthe's life is so much better now that she's taking care of children!" but that's an entirely different solution to a problem Minthe never had. She never got treatment for her BPD. She just got away from H x P which, while is a good thing, isn't actually analyzed as such. It's treated more as a "good thing" for H x P and the readers, because now they don't have to be subjected to Minthe's evil scheming anymore, something something "the evil is defeated". And don't even get me started on this comic's problem with constantly resolving female characters' story arcs through motherhood.

It bums me out so fucking much. Minthe deserved so much better. She's one of the many characters in LO who make it so painfully ironic when they're done dirty, because despite Rachel's attempts to write a "feminist retelling" that focuses on "moving on from trauma", she's inadvertently done more damage to feminism and the stigmas around mental health and trauma through her assassination of grounded and realistic and relatable characters like Minthe and Demeter who are shown ZERO empathy or understanding for their actions (unless it can be done so by making Persephone and Hades into the heroes). It happens so often throughout the comic it almost feels like how the comic markets itself as a "progressive feminist retelling" is some sick joke that I'm just not getting.

[sugar-omi]

Can I request some HC about Cove and cockwarming 👀

omfg yes you can

NSFW, gn reader, step 3 + 4 + DILF ! cove, multiple scenarios, prbly ooc bc dilf!cove is a menance over here ok, prbly ooc step 4 cove too but ion care imma babygirl him ‼️‼️

STEP 3 COVE

you can't expect an 18 year old to be normal or calm abt it

he's all whiny and tense

you're only on his dick long enough to adjust. both of you clinging onto each other and panting, tryna get used to such an intense feeling

you can try teasing him by cockwarming, but it really won't work

begs you to move, uses those big blues to try and sway you

will probably cry if you keep swirling your hips or clenching around him, he can't help but fall over the edge and lose his patience

doesnt matter if you you hold on long enough or are swayed by cove's sweet begging

but now it's your turn for your head to spin because cove thrusts up into you, holding you and hiding his face in your neck

I love the idea of him getting caught up in the moment again and flipping you over on your back and thrusting into you...

makes you finish first because I think he's totally obsessed with watching you finish, especially when you finish around him

STEP 4 COVE

you still can't expect him to be normal

but fuck does he love it

ik I haven't included switch cove n any of the other 2 scenarios (writing this bit last, yes I write backwards)

but I gotta tell you man...

he loves it sm

doesn't matter if it's a strap, loves cockwarming you

mmm, going throughout the day, splitting him open on your cock during different times of the day

please do ask him to stop doing a chore to sit in your lap, he's so weak rn

fuck, come up behind him n just slip in while he's washing dishes, he's in heaven rn

the whole day he's hard, ruined his pants w pre bc he's been in pieces the whole day

by the time you finally fuck him, he's in tears n so happy n pleased

also dies of happiness a bit when you cockwarm him

jfc doing it in the morning. or before bed, while you sleep...

is so turned on by this, sometimes he just can't do it and you'll wake up to cove squirming, apologizing but begging to fuck, begging to cum..

if he makes it through the whole night though... gets the pleasant scene of seeing you on too of him, grinding on his lap n telling him you should hurry up n finish before work<33

fuck imagine teasing him the same way dilf cove does (so spoilers lol)

n having him in your lap or you're in his, and you're tryna watch a show n you're moving your hips..

grinding on him, thrusting up into him..

either way he couldn't hold on, n now you have HIM on the coffee table or laid out on the couch, heart eyes while watching you take him while on top 🫶🫶

he's in love actually

DILF COVE

oh he does it for fun

this is a sport to him

how long can you sit on his cock until you either whine n beg, or you need to get back to the rest of the world

fuck, if you don't have kids or they're grown. he'll do it while you guys sleep<3

anyway🙈

this is almost like a punishment, n like I said, it's entirely for his entertainment n he'll fucking do it while he's watching TV or on the computer

will twist your nipple or rub your sex

kisses your sensitive neck or pushes your hips down

"sorry baby, I was grabbing a pen"

although at some point he'll surprise you by languishingly fucking you. his cock dragging against your walls...

it's so slow n such a tease n it's just enough to keep your stomach burning

omfg cockwarming while he plays a game or watches a show...

you're tryna watch this movie, but you're only half way paying attention if at all because of cove

it's a romance, or some shitty action movie with too many unnecessary sex scenes

every time the characters make out, kissing n groping each other

he's grabbing at you, groping your chest, teasingly stroking your sex, kissing you breathless..

and every sexy scenergy he thrusts up into you, holding your hips down while you cling onto his arms that are wrapped around your waist

either it ends in neither of you cumming, successfully edging yourselves until the end of the movie

or you bent over the coffee table or with your legs up, buried in the corner of the couch as cove works you both through one or two orgasms <33

just the sexual tension alone turns him on, will happily go all day, splitting you on his cock n then going about your day without cumming

fuck, he'll do it before work and then at dinner.. his younger self would've choked and died at just the thought

tells you you look so pretty cumming for him, also tells you some nasty shit like he's so pent up n can't wait to fuck you, can't wait to finish inside you

tells you he's been thinking abt it all day...

pls dilf cove so good n yet so bad for our hearts... 🫣

[thatdeadaquarius]

Reader that can emit sounds from their memory(like as an aura)

Walk into a room? Why do I hear boss music

Comedic timing? Fuck yeah.

Bored? Jumpscare noise.

Zhongli talking? Jeopardy theme.

Someone is annoying? Earrape.

Think about it!

Hello! I’m the 12th Harbinger, aka as CHIL- bitch shut the fuck up, WHATS UP ITS YA BOY AQUARIUSSS- /ref

lmao imagine you walking into a room like this in teyvat, with like that audio I SAVE BY GIVING IT CPR- TIGHT AS VIRGIN BOY DONT GET NERVOUS-

(also ill stop apologizing for the late replies to these, bc as we all know by now that im slow and u will get answered eventually i promise tumblr most likely didnt delete u guys asks im just hoarding them LMAO)

I’ve been super busy running in circles so sorry about ghosting! I still very much enjoy and love u guys and love seeing you guys enjoy my stuff :’) 

Still cant believe that, but thank you!

JEOPARDY THEME MUSIC WHEN ZHONGLI TALKS

HE’D BE SO CONFUSED

THINKIN HE GOT AN ANCIENT CURSE HE DOESNT KNOW ABT PUT ON HIM OR SMTH BC HE’S ALWAYS BEING STALKED BY THIS SONG-

(tbh unless the person is super observant I dont think most ppl would get that it’s YOU causing this chaos lmao)

◇

Like I can see Zhongli eventually getting it lol, other ppl I could see after the first few weeks of interacting with you (esp bc you mix it up, honestly it was only bc u kept playing the jeopardy theme over and over when Zhongli ranted on too long that he got it was you 💀):

Heizou (he’s the best detective on all of Inazuma’s islands, ofc he got it! no he will not acknowledge that he totally thought you were hiding a very musical tanuki somewhere on your person at all times lol)

◇

Alhaitham and Cyno (haitham took like, two hours of walking around town with you and knew, bc he’s a little know-it-all lazy bastard like that, and Cyno is actually just really aware, despite what most ppl think, he’s the General Mahamatra and not just a regular Mahamatra for a reason after all)

◇

Tighnari (i stg he can like, smell when bullshittery is happening in his vicinity …or... hear?)

◇

Venti (unsurpringly, he’s totally in love with this power of yours, i mean he definitely loves you cares about you a lot he says, but you’re starting to think he’s just lying to butter you up into pranking Diluc, Barbara, Jean, and really the entirety of Mondstadt more often  including Zhongli just so he can laugh until he’s on the ground again, also he definitely once asked you to make a dragon sound that’s the equivalent of shouting FUCK at Dvalin when he was flying overhead one day)

◇

Hmm

Hm hm hmmmm

Who elseee, i need a characcctterrr lisstttt…

Albedo (duh, he’s albedo, you think he has an entirely too thick folder dedicated to your recent obsessions, you rant a lot about it while playing and also he can access your browsing history 👀, and he somehow doesn't know that about you?? You’re like, literally one of his long-term, there-for-life, has-bought-a-house-for-free-in-his-head-you- arent-even-on-rent-anymore, hyperfixations or special interests. Autistic!Albedo is autistic, Because I Am Your God, And I Say It Is So.)

◇

Dehya (always knows when its you walking around near her bc you like to listen to your old world’s songs too often when you arent pranking bitches, she actually rlly likes it and your music tastes…)

☆

HOLY FUCK SPEED RUN BC GOD THERE’S TOO MANY BITCHES WANNA BE YOUR BABY, RIDING AROUND IN A DAMN MERCEDES-

OKAY-

SO not all in the same way or at the same time, or even the same length of time did they realize you literally change background music or some shit so I’ll let you just- you know okay- like you get it- you get it.

Xiao, Kazuha, Kaeya, Diluc, Ayato, Yae Miko, Keqing, Qiqi, Klee, Sara, Kuki, Nahida, Ningguang, Rosaria, Scaramouche/Babygirl, Dainsleif, Kokomi, Xinyan, Yun Jin, Yelan. 

Jfc got the whole damn pride flag up here

Anyway everybody else outta luck, at least takes em a month or longer to get it lol

♡

Sorry abt the end there i didnt feel like writing out all those bitches bc the few I did before were already longer than I thought they’d be…

Also, I am posting these spam of drafts (and that old follower 100+ event possession headcanons in prep for the next 2 weeks bc I will be really busy, again :/

Got spring break shenanigans this week, then I’ll be running around like a cat with zoomies bc im getting ready to install/actually submit my artworks for the gallery exhibition! 

…wish me luck or prayers or anything good from any god you believe in, I need the strength. 

With love, safe travels,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

[bigdsgirl]

Love Next Door Episode 12

look i had to watch sports and do chores (sigh), but I am HERE now. and i have THOUGHTS. because lovelies, we fucking MADE IT!!!!!!

these two dweebs, just kiss again. <3 with your banana milk <3

god these two are children i am cackling, they cannot admit what is happening!!!! lmfao!!!

seung-hyo is dying and i love it

not him offering her food. DEAD. I will not survive the episode.

and not her being like hey!!! only i get food offered by my man!!

WERE THERE ANY BUGS????? lol omfg.

the way they continue to revert back to their sassy selves each time they transition or deal with wild news 😭😭😭

"I've always been with you" BYE I AM DUST

not the going through their history through small touches. BYE.

okay now smooch. please for the love of god.

NO GIRL not the hair!!! KISS AGJLDGJAFGK

omg he is so happy with them cuddling <3 this man is over the moon.

i will be the using the shot of them on a bench as a background somewhere, mark my words. or it's going to be the center of a bullet journal spread because AHHH

omg mo-eum girl, rock the interview! you got this babe!

as a hiring manager at my work, girl you killlling it

oh hi mr. seung-hyo's dad! and other guy! are we about to brawl? kinda feels like it.

goodness that man is just... so fine. silver/grey hair is gorgeous.

this man is so confused lolw hat is happening

YEAH TELL HER YOU LOVE HER! AND HE CANNOT SWAY HER!

YEAH SHE IS SO PRETTY HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE HER???

HAHA OMFG HES GAY! GO OFF KING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this. is. a. comedy. i. love. it.

well this changes everything and i love it <3 just two queens that are besties who work together <3

bahaha he's so embarrassed. i'm dying. the GROAN ma'am i love it

finally communicating, i love that. also she has a point! it's not her secret to tell! omg. and he's like "i married a baddie my god" and boy you are right.

omg "mom I'm an influencer now" omg she called it an influenza. I am using that now. ☠️

omg no not the blind date for seok-ryu

i have a feeling it will be the journalist and i will lose it

omfg his FACE when mom asked about the blind date. i will fucking die this is a comedy of the highest tier

cowards!!! you tell your biggest fan!!!

oh she knows. and a superfan would know! go off queen!

WE ADMITTED IT LETS GOO!!!

"I feel like my body and soul is refreshed and massaged" GIRL SPEAK ON IT!!!!!!!!!!!

not the flashbacks with everyone being like YOU ARE IN LOVE!!!!! and Mo-eum just in the background 😭🤭

Not her saying she's out of his league and that's why people never put seung-hyo and mo-eum together I LOVE HER

dear god if yeon-du is not her step daughter by the end of this show, I will be committing crimes of revenge. they are a FAMILY.

HELL YEAH MOM! Yeon-du should be her daughter!!!

ALERT! ALERT! GORGEOUS GREEN SHIRT ON HIM!!!!!!! I AM LOSING IT!!!!!!

he was built to be a dad, i luv him.

"arizona si, chicago no", what in the sam heck are these shirts, hilarious

he says look, i want to scream this from the rooftops that we are together. <3 and boy, I get it.

oh no girl. girl he is planning forever with you. oh no oh no.

oh girl, seok-ryu looks so cute in those PJs!!!

hahah oh girl you are going to regret saying what you said. he says no one can know? got it, 12 feet apart at all times.

oh girl what the fuck why you do that!!!!! that's his phone!!!!

I am glad he is standing up for himself. because i agree, her behavior is not appropriate at all!!!!!!!

movie! date! making out at the movies! lets go!

adventure day with the fam let's freaking do it!!!!!!

are we CAMPING???? YAY! I love a good camping trip!

oh they are such a good team <3 cute cute!

Mo-eum is such a cool cat, i love her

jfc they are such a family already!!! barbecue! water gun fights!

did this show just say trans rights? I am electing yes with the umbrella shot 😎

we love a trip sponsored by electric cars. fancy!

the 🤌yearning🤌

omg the water spot on the shirt hot him bothered! ope! omfg not the giving her his FLANNEL!!!!!!!

my girl looks so good for her movie date!!!! eep!! oh goodie, time for her..... to experience the "no one can know". lol he's working on architecture project, of course. omg everyone is cuddling except them!!!!!!!! WAHH NOOOOOO

what a gorgeous sunset for these gorgeous people. ugh she is the cutest lil kiddo. omg. wait. wait. is it time??? are we gonna.... ya know, talk about it??

WAIT CAT I SAW A CAT!!!!!

god she loves this girl so much, how can you not want her as her step mom?????

holy shit. holy. shit. she said it. SHE SAID IT.

i am stunned. what a beautiful confession. MO-EUM MY GIRL.

yeah let's cancel the agreement!!!! it wasn't a mistake!!!

NEVER???????????? SIR????? 😔

No no no no please, you three deserve happiness and its with each other! please!

god damn it. Now she's gonna take the job in antartica so he doesn't feel bad.

HAHAH the hand reaching. girl just GRAB IT!

LOL the "you go in first"

oh no not the doc visit.

OH THANK GOD ITS NOT ALZHEIMERS! YESS!!!!!!! GOD BLESS!!!!

Due to stress and anxiety??? well I hope that is the case.... I am not a fan of this. hmm hmm hmm.

LOL HES SO HAPPY!!! My lil baby <3 he's such a drama queen.

like father like son :)

oh girl. oh girl. I laugh because you did this to yourself. you asked him not to bring it up!

ope a family dinner oh my goodness. my girl Tae-hui stirring the pot like the queen she is

omg seung-hyo is so nervous and she is SO JEALOUS

these two are children omfg, just communicate

PARENTS OVERNIGHT TRIP????? SO THEY WILL HAVE THE HOUSE TO THEMSELVES???? LETS FREAKING! GO!

love the fanny back good sir

lol them arguing and seok-ryu dying, i feel the same

OH BROTHER IS LEAVING TOO????

oh we about to fuck. shit. up! let's go!!!!!!!!!

the parents being so silly and jealous of each other

oh he GOT THE LENS -- that lens is way too big but i love the enthusiasm lmfao - he STUDIED

GIRL TIME! YAY!

boy call her she might kill you -- i hate to say it

omfg! bestie boy time too!! except these boys need to stop being awkward <3

God bless Mo-eum, she is the truly best friend to both Seok-ryu and Seung-hyo <3

Mo-eum baby you deserve the world <3 i hope he grovels so hard when he realizes how much he mucked up

god this show just nails friendships at all stages, acquaintances, work friends, new friends, new neighbors, long term besties as youth, young adults, later in life. just ALL OF IT!

NOT Tae-hui giving him WEDDING CUPS FOR THE TWO OF THEM??????? A QUEEEEEEEN.

omg he mad a pet house??? for the kitty?? the she saved??? that she is allergic to??? omfg. i am a mess. the baby house he made them, and the upgrade now!!!

WAIT THEY ARE THE BABIES OF THEM??? AHH!!!

SHE WAS HIS FIRST CLIENT!!!! HE MADE IT! FOR HER!!!! WAHHH

date night at the crib! screaming!

he is so happy she was jealous <3 h

he couldnt focus at work??? omfg girl you are wrecking him

"comic books in my room" ooooooo is that what we are calling it now??? heh!!!!

first time in here as a your BOYFRIENNND

he's admitting he went for HER! not the book!

omg he's admitting how nervous he was!!!!!!!

BOY IS IN PANIC MODE FROM DAY ONE!!!!!!!!! WAH!

YAY COMMUNICATION!!!!!!

she said, bad thoughts are fine 🤭 and approved bad deeds? boy we are in it NOW! the DOOR IS SHUT! EEK! THE LIGHT IS OFF? OH HELL YEAH! LFG!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for asking my mum to clean out the kitty litter trays even though its usually my chore

i drove to doctors and work this morning, i worked 8.30 till 5 she worked 8.30 til 4 and drove home after her shift ended to pick up my dance clothes for me (i only didnt have them because i had to stay late at work since 3 people went home sick).

my friend cancelled on me for dance tryouts so i spend the afternoon crying and eventually choose to go anyway because i was excited for hiphop but by this point my head is pounding.

i get out of work, she drives me to dance and goes to get macdonalds while she waits for me to get out. halfway through dance they mention we are not even doing hiphop today not until next week (u have to pay for the tryouts btw)

i get out 7.40ish. on the drive home im thinking "fuck its almost 8 i havent done any uni study, (i have 2 lectures, a quiz and like 8 readings that need to be done today and tomorrow), i havent spent any time with our cats or cleaned their litter trays yet."

for reference we have new cats and are introducing them into a house with a dog so rn we have them in one room and let them out occassionally while putting the dog out back, while i clean out the litter trays and top them up every day, once a week we empty them completely and clean them out

so we get home and i say "would it be too much to ask if you could please do the litter trays tonight" i try to explain that i have a headache and ive still got a lot of uni homework to do and i havent spent any time with the cats so i'd play with them for a bit while she cleans the trays and then do my homework

immeadiately she starts yelling at me that shes tired, she hasnt been home from work all day, she did it last time, shes done so many favours for me already today and blah blah blah.

the way i see it, first, i clean the kitty litter trays every day and vacuum their room. she has literally never done this, she emptied out and washed a tray last week because i was sick and got home from work and passed out. i (a learner btw so im very stressed when i drive) drove us to her appt and then to work, i worked more hours than her today, i danced all night with a headache, i also have not been home all day, after being cancelled on and then them not even doing the type of dance i wanted to do and i still have to do uni work tonight so i dont think im the selfish one here.

but sitting in my cats room while they eat their dinner i can hear her storm about and slam doors because shes so mad at me but i dont understand am i in the wrong here?

also literally as i am writing this she comes out and goes "tell me when youve finished dinner so i can let the cats out. and DONT leave it too late" while my food is literally cooking as we fucking speak jfc.

i have a bit of a diary where i write when mum is mad at me because if i mention to her that she upset me it never goes well so i write it down to safely let those feelings out and as i was writing this one i just needed some clarity i really cant fathom any reason for her to be mad except egocentrism so perhaps an unbias outsider can shed light?

What are these acronyms?

[still-a-morosexual-help]

I think.....I might have sort of pushed my asshole coworker into giving his two weeks notice???

Rant under the cut

During a time where he was pissed off at the management but refusing to leave because he "completes something once he started it" I kept telling him how since he was "so much more qualified & experienced than me he had more options, he wasn't stuck here like me, he didn't have to take this shit and wait here" (insert *sweet voice & fluttering eyelashes*) and anyway about a week ago he suddenly handed in his resignation

The biggest reason is that obviously he's pissed off at the big man in charge.....but for my own peace of mind I like to think I played a small part in it

Anyway I pissed him off so badly today he's giving me (& everyone else) the silent treatment. For a man who has no problem insulting every single thing about what you say, do, look like AND your family members he gets awfully sulky when you tell him you'll "never take advice from him".

Sorry I don't want to take advice from someone whose personality & values I genuinely dislike and who spends a majority of his time shit talking his wife - like you are clearly miserable AND I have 0 respect for you, why would I want your advice?? If anything I want my life to be nothing like yours. I don't want to grow to be this bitter & rotten. I don't want the people around me to text each other behind my back consoling each other because I'm that much of a shithead

He'll say something very personal and insulting about you and laugh his ass off, then he'll look at you to see if you're laughing. If you're not he'll slam his hand onto the desk next to you and ask why you have no personality/are boring (genuinely think he takes delight in how much the slamming has an effect on you - if you're more likely to flinch he'll do it more often)

But the SECOND you return that treatment he gets butthurt girl what happend to you

This man is 20 YEARS my senior, SIR WHO THE FUCK SHAT IN YOUR CEREAL

I've never met anyone so obviously insecure? so obviously trying hard to fit in with the younger office crowd around him, but the only way he knows to do that is by being loud & crass & mean? So much of a hypocrite but so oblivious to the fact?

Anyway congrats to this fucker who in the 2 and a half weeks I have known him has managed to be, in no particular order, : racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, islamaphobic, ableist, violently angry, fatphobic, a braggart, a big fan of corporal punishment, thinks he's funnier than he actually is and gets angry when you disagree, thinks he's smarter and more capable than every single person to ever exist, spent minutes talking about how stupid our 21 year old coworker (who refuses to talk to him) is, a HUGE fucking hypocrite AND SOMEHOW MORE

edit:

HE PUT HIS SMALL AS FUCK CHILDREN ON SPEAKER SO WE COULD ALL HEAR HOW SCARED THEY WERE WHEN HE THREATENED TO COME HOME IF THEY DIDN'T IMMEDIATELY GO TO SLEEP. WHO DOES THAT!? I'VE NEVER HEARD SOMEONE'S VOICE "QUIVER IN FEAR" BEFORE THEN AND I NEVER WANT TO HEAR IT AGAIN, SPECIALLY WHEN ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE IS A 5YR OLD JFC

I feel like I'm making up a cartoon villain😭

[yellow-computer-mouse]

Moot what is being a therian like? I've only ever really heard terms like shifting. It being a therian a choice? Can it be a choice? Also do you have one of those cool masks? :3 do you know where to get them?

I've always been really interested in therians and non-humans in general and ik the basics of how its mostly a spiritual thing. I just feel like I should ask someone who experiences all that

Also you don't have to answer anything! Just curious :] /gen

OOH!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU FOR THIS I LOVE YAPPING ABOUT COOL STUFF!! /gen

i'm gonna answer these questions first and then get to the big one

Being a therian can be a choice! The correct term is otherlink. However, I don't care what labels people use! go crazy!! /gen

For me, it's not a choice! I'm just a lil kitty/dragon (/possible god of fucking wind from fucking epic the musical but that's different)

I do NOT have a cool mask bc I'm closeted + idk where to get them... they're probably on amazon! I'm so sorry I wish I knew (btw! masks are completely fine to wear if you're not a therian!! in case anyone was curious)

Being a therian is a spiritual thing for a lot of us, but not everyone! :)

anyways, now for the biggie: what it's like being a therian! keep in mind this is my experience, and also I'm going to be yapping about being fictionkin as well

Being a therian, for me, doesn't impact my day-to-day life much. I don't have trouble connecting with humans. I do, however, kind of hate seeing my face in reflections. Not fun.

I always used to hate the cold, and while I do still prefer warm weather, I've found brisk fall weather kind of comforting since awakening (Norwegian forest cats and IceWings live in colder climates (especially IceWings jfc). Actually, cooler wind triggered a shift for me today lol (still going btw!!!!! i love being winter wings of fire lol)

It makes it hard to look at my hands sometimes, because they're not paws. I also sometimes have a (very weak) phantom tail/ears! It's pretty fun, got a big ol bushy cat tail!

That's all my yapping, tysm for the question Joone!! i am always open to questions about any of my identities lol :3

(also in case ur curious.. my kins are Snowfall and Winter and a Norwegian forest cat!)

[journeysfable]

Can some of y'all be more aropec friendly jfc

Hot take but if you can't explain why you ship two characters without shoving aspec people under the bus (hint: we are not inherently assholes) (second hint: we are capable of enjoying the way someone looks) (third hint: we are capable of having intimate and deep relationships that aren't romantic or sexual.) (fourth hint: read the third one again) (Fifth hint: hot take but 'friends don't do x' 'yea sure but you only think of them as a friend /sarc' 'more than friendly things' are inherently aphobic)

Maybe you should ask yourself why you feel the need to ship those characters romantically at all. If you can't come up with an answer than I think you should read about amatonormativity and start unlearning some shit

If you just want two characters to get together, I promise you can make argument for it that doesn't boil down to stomping all over aspec people.

Sorry if I'm being a little rude-

Actually I'm not gonna apologize.

I'm aroace and I'm making that everyone else's problem because allos have shoved me and my experiences under the radar my entire fucking life and I have 0% patience and tolerance for this shit.

[carlyraejepsans]

i lowkey disagree w u on ur position on fictional ships and certain portrayals of topics such as incest and pedophilia, but oh my fucking god to have the fucking. AUDACITY to accuse someone of real life pedophila and incest because they MENTIONED being NEUTRAL on a certain topic?? like you didnt even say you think fictional incest is cool and rad or wtvr u afaik (which. even if u did that ask would Still be abhorrent) but ur explicitly Neutral and are VERY carful to tag shit and i just. 1/2

cut for length and also sensitive topics

i cannot fucking imagine accusing someone of such a horrid act with such conviction bc u SLightly DIsagree on a topic. jfc. i block tags and if ur conversations ever drive me over the edge id Unfollow. im so so sorry people are such fucking assholes man. i hope people gain some sense abt these topics im so sorry

yeah no i completely respect your opinion. and i do know where it's coming from. to tell you the truth (basic decency of tagging triggers aside), i DO find most of those fanon portrayals to be cheap and uncalled for a good majority of the time, at least from a literary standpoint. things like dating a minor or your own sibling have serious implications on a character's moral code and interpersonal dynamics where most characters would... not fucking do that! and the moment you don't engage with those implications, it becomes either incredibly ooc or altogether shallow. some people act like a topic being problematic makes it inherently complex and rich, when it can be as tropey and flat as any other "safe" topic. being problematic doesn't make you interesting etc. my point isn't arguing over literary value, it's more like... there's people behaving horribly and cruelly towards the AUTHORS, and making disgusting assumptions like the one that was made against me, all because of fiction you can always filter out at the end of the day (assuming basic tagging etiquette is respected ofc) and like. that's too far. nobody deserves to be treated like this.

not to mention, the "incest fiction recs"/"pro incest posts" those freaks mentioned were literally 1) me gushing about revolutionary girl utena, a deeply feminist and self-aware series that unpacks the misogyny behind anime incest tropes by treating that abuse REALISTICALLY as patriarchal manipulation from a male relative and showing how the female victim suffers and emancipates herself from it and 2) me being annoyed that hs showed one of its characters suffering from csa without acknowledging it AS abuse, even when it would've been not just the morally decent thing to do, but also a genuinely good addition to his character arc (apparently it does do that in the endstory, but i didn't know it at the time). those are both posts about realistic, condemning, and well-thought depictions of incestuous abuse in fiction—which is the only way i ever enjoy the topic btw—but that didn't stop these people from deciding i had an incest fetish and harassing me for weeks on end to the point of accusing me of sexually abusing my teenage brother. like you said, it would be a ghoulish way to treat someone even if their assumption had been right (and it wasn't), but it's like they saw the topic being mentioned and that fact alone was unforgivable, regardless of context. and this crap happens to people all the time! if that's not fucking stupid i don't know what is

[steelthroat]

I only have 1 very controversial opinion:

You should have a license for kids and pets.

Long rant incoming:

Like... yeah, I know it's bad, it can be strumentalized politically etc etc. I know I know- controlling natality like that is dangerous and stuff. Fine, I get it, I swear I do.

But seriously after all the [INCREDIBLY BAD] parenting I witness (especially now that I am staying at the theme park) and the straight up animal abuse (because otherwise I don't know how to label that shit) I see from certain dog owners...

GEE I GET IT PARENTING/TAKING CARE OF AN ANIMAL IT'S HARD BLA BLA BLA. Don't have them. Please I swear to God Don't make what are supposed to be good memories fucking miserable to your kids.

Just be humble and seek some help or informations on how to take care of something/someone else.

Look. I've seen poor dogs laying on the floor under the few shadows that are here and there tired, absolutely devastated. And I know for a fact the ground ain't cool, those dipshits that own them walk with fucking shoes on and forget the main reason they do huhhh???

DO NOT BRING DOGS WITH YOU AT THE THEME PARK. JFC IT'S NOT THAT HARD OF A CONCEPT. Your dog will be tired, the floor is literally lava, you CANNOT bring them on the roller coasters and you cannot leave them to the staff. It will be stressing for you and miserable for them, do not fucking do it.

And please parents don't be assholes for a day? Jfc it's the first time your 5yrs old kid has experience something like that, be patient???? My god, they're excited, YOU brought them here, match even a half of their enthusiasm.

I know your kid has asked you to look at [insert thing] 30 times and you've already seen it 3000 times before. THEY HAVEN'T. THEY ARE FIVE FFS. LOOK AT THEM SHOWING YOU THE COOL THING. It takes five seconds, even less and they’ll be satisfied.

And the ones who snap at their kids after they ask them something twice.

I hate you. You should have never reproduced. You made life miserable for both you and your poor kid that DOESN'T DESERVE YOU.

Like I don't get it, kids ARE hard and can be pretty annoying, 100% no doubt in my mind. But also if you listen to them, if you [EDUCATE] them and understand how they think... it does get easier. You're the parent. If you don't know how your kids "work" you're doing a bad job.

And maybe you are gonna think "hey Zero, you don't have kids you don't understand, also there is a difference between a parent ignoring a tantrum and what you're saying maybe they are..."

NO. Nuh uh! I've been around children all my life, I've had to help some parents, spend a lot of time being the babysitter of the friend group to the younger siblings.

And guess what? I was their favorite person, why? I matched their energy, I LISTENED to them and I was KIND to them when they asked something. If I had to stop a tantrum I didn't turn it into a screaming match.

Guess I was doing SOMETHING right if ALL those kids from different backgrounds and contexts decided *I* was someone worth listening to.

______________________________

On a more serious note, I know a license for kids is not a good thing because 100% this would be strumentalized against natives, people of color, poor people, etcetera. Yes, yes, I know. It should never become a reality. I am just venting about the bad parents I see, and I wish nothing for them to see the error in their ways and to not further traumatize or make their kids' lives miserable and start over. I believe in rehabilitation and redemption.

I am just angry and tired mate.

A license for animals, however, is something I am starting to believe in after some shit I've witnessed. These owners are dangerous.