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shalotttower · 9 months

Text

Pholcus phalangioides

Title: Pholcus phalangioides

Fandom: The Collector (2009). Can be read as an original inspired by the source, because I took some creative liberties.

Summary: There's a spider in your bathroom, it lives under the mirror cabinet and you a) don't want to kill it, and b) are too scared to touch it, so now you can either keep giving it one side eye after another, or ask your neighbour for help.

Word count: 4000+

Characters: Asa Emory x Reader

Notes: yandere Asa, spiders and insects descriptions, stalking, voyeurism of sort - Asa watches Reader without her realizing it, kidnapping, vague hinting on body horror, non-con touching, Reader is socially awkward. Asa is not 100% in-movie-character Asa (he actually talks lol), a huge chunk of him is based on my headcanons.

You have this problem - a spider problem, to be precise. Not that it's too big of a deal, but...it also is.

Spiders are generally okay.

They eat unwanted guests, like flies and mosquitos or even other spiders. Make cool webs, which is probably one of the most complicated forms of art, not to mention a mathematical pattern to it - a combination of radial and circular symmetry. The golden ratio in nature.

In general they're important for keeping a backyard ecosystem nice and intact.

But.

But there is a spider in your bathroom, right under the sink cabinet, with thin legs, a long body, and of course - eyes. Quiet, kept to itself, really chill spider who doesn't move much except to crawl around a little and sometimes look at you when it catches you looking.

It probably lived in hiding somewhere, before deciding that dark spaces weren't up to its standards anymore and making an appearance. You haven't swatted it away, caught it, struck it with a paper - mostly because you're not good at killing living creatures, and secondly because the spider isn't doing any harm, just observing your every step, and generally being present.

When you check your makeup bag, it watches. When you brush your teeth, it watches. When you close the cabinet door it wiggles and your heart goes "ee" as if someone shocked it with a static charge. This yellowish-brown witness of your everyday activities, silently approving and judging, lately makes you feel like a nuisance in your own bathroom. You desperately wish there was a way to make it move to another corner. A less centralized one, less straight in your face. Yet the thought of touching it makes you cringe inwardly; your mind conjures images of different scenarios involving spider-related unpleasantries - accidentally squashing it, or getting bitten and dying a slow, miserable death.

It's gotta go.

Because the more you see it, the more your brain tries to assign it human features. And the longer it stares, the bigger the chance it might grow a pair of lips to say "get out of my bathroom".

The thought comes to you in the morning while setting a breakfast plate on the kitchen counter. The house is quiet, all windows are open and you stare through one of them at your neighbour's fence. You rarely see him, though the parked car is always a giveaway of his presence. Emory, that's what the mailbox says, and he has a neat garden, not an extravagant type, but everything is carefully trimmed and arranged into simple patterns.

There's even a stone bench by a small tree. Does it actually get used on sunny days? Probably no. He seems like a loner, from what you've seen so far: tall and pale, with wire-rimmed glasses and still grey eyes. Very focused and put together, a turtleneck and dark trousers kind of Mister. Never waving when passing by, though he does glance sometimes - sharp and attentive.

Once you caught him leaning over a bush with back straight and head hanging low. Your stomach gave this funny, nervous twitch, like when a stranger tries to start a conversation in public. He looked your way and then resumed whatever he was doing.

"Whatever" appeared to be something small, sharp limbs and a shiny body. It looked like a beetle, stretched to an absurd degree, and the way he held that thing felt strangely intimate. The same way you'd cradle a baby animal in your hands, rubbing its forehead with a fingertip. Emory put it in a plastic box, sealed it, and went into his house, not sparing you another glance.

This particular memory - of long fingers and a careful grasp - is what makes you think that maybe, possibly, theoretically, he could handle one pesky spider for you. You've seen him with insects a couple of times after, no doubt Mr. Emory is one of those who glue bugs to display boards. The creepy friend in the bathroom must be right up his alley then.

Five minutes later the two of you are staring at each other in awkward silence. Bothering barely acquainted neighbours isn't usually high on your list of priorities, especially if said neighbours look like they prefer being alone. You know it's odd, you know it probably crosses some boundaries, yet here you are.

With a crease on his brow and a tight mouth, Emory isn't thrilled at this sudden visit. Maybe he was in the middle of something, or is just uncomfortable with people invading his space. In any case, you clear your throat.

"Good morning. I live in the house across the road. The white porch? With-"

"I know," it's a dry reply. Not rude, more matter-of-factly; his eyes are fixed on you with a hint of unsettling peculiarity which makes you shift from one foot to the other.

He's not pest control, you think. Or obligated to help in any way. Emory can tell you to kindly fuck off right now and close the door, why did you even come here? It's stupid and intrusive. You're almost ready to take it all back and go home, pretend like nothing happened and just deal with that spider yourself, when he speaks again.

"What do you need?"

He has a quiet voice, a very even direct tone that doesn't encourage small talk, but prompts answers. Now and without pointless filling.

"I know how it's going to sound," you start, cringing inside, "and apologize in advance for bothering you, but I had an impression you collect...bugs."

"Insects. Arachnids."

"Right. So I was thinking if you'd mind removing a spider from my bathroom. I don't want to kill it, but I can't- I can't touch it."

His gaze slowly shifts from your face to the house behind you. As if Emory has an x-ray vision, or a complete mental map of your household layout. Ha, this would be ridiculous. There's no apparent disapproval in his pale face, but something else, a different kind of assessment. Evaluation of how much it is worth spending time on someone with an overgrown lawn? His eyes return back and you feel pinned down.

The longer he stays silent, the more you wish for the ground to open and swallow you whole.

"If you can't I totally understand-"

"What kind of spider?"

It's your turn to stare. How are you supposed to know, you've never studied spider biology. It looks like any other common variety, except creepier because it refuses to leave its spot and stay in the sewer where it belongs. "I...light-brownish, with long legs. Thin? Slender," there's more you could add but any further description will probably make you sound like a total dunce who can't recognize basic arachnids. "Kind of big."

You expect a 'sure', maybe 'I'll be there shortly' or 'no'. What you get is Emory moving past you and walking up your front porch. The scent of laundry detergent and soap, very clean, hits your nose before you rush to open the door.

"Uhm. Second floor," you explain, awkwardly shuffling after him. For the first time since the day you moved in, you worry about what someone might see inside the house. As far as clutter goes, your place is acceptable, perhaps a few forgotten cups around and yesterday's sweater thrown on a couch. Surely, it's not too bad.

Emory, however, doesn't seem interested in the surroundings. The staircase doesn't even creak under his weight, despite the house being around a century old. He steps over the little border which always makes you trip if you walk too fast, like it's not there. Like the corner you often bump your hip into doesn't exist either. He navigates your home with effortless precision, an inward kind of certainty that makes your eyebrows rise. Maybe...the houses on your street have the same blueprint.

Either way, he walks into your bathroom without hesitation, turning on the light. You hover by the doorway, unsure: should you offer something to drink, ask him if he needs anything else or just step away and leave him to do his thing?

The spider is there, hiding under the cabinet, when Emory leans over to observe it. He's probably seen many different specimens, you think, and this isn't interesting at all compared to the ones who have an intricate design or unique behavior.

"She's a part of the Pholcidae family," Emory says suddenly. Just like that there's 'she', instead of 'it', and the spider twitches and shifts. "Daddy long-legs. Harmless."

He puts his palm up close to its back. At first, it seems startled, but after a moment slowly calms down, and moves a leg - left then right - getting familiar with his hand.

"Docile creatures," Emory continues, while the spider walks along the edge of his palm. No running around, no random leaps, stick-like limbs touch and probe him with curiosity, much like you'd study something new. "They stay in the dark, hide in the corners while feasting on smaller things. Your intruder is a useful tenant."

It makes you feel slightly nauseous, how nonchalant he is about holding something that prompts recoil on instinct.

"Do you want to hold her?" Emory turns to you and there's a faint, strange smile on his lips. It doesn't reach his eyes and makes him look like an alien who tries to mimic human expressions based only on observation. His pupils are so dark that you can barely tell the difference between the irises and the rest. They seem bottomless, absorbing all light, but reflecting none in return. You take one step backwards, shaking your head.

"I'll pass."

He keeps staring at you for what feels like forever before returning his attention to the spider crawling on his skin. Emory reaches into his back pocket for a small container.

"Are you not setting her outside?" You ask. "She...she doesn't look like, uh, a rare species."

Not that you're an expert.

"No," Emory closes the lid with a quiet click. "She isn't one. But I'm going to keep her."

And he does. The little captive spider rests at the very bottom of a plastic case when you send the man on his way and thank him for the help. Emory accepts it with a nod, no further words, and then there's only his back when he leaves. The morning air rushes in, crisp and fresh, smelling like grass, tree leaves and soil.

It feels like you blink, and three days go by. You still keep an eye on the bathroom cabinet by some sort of habit, however there's nothing out of the ordinary lurking there, no creepy critters and definitely no thin legs scattering in multiple directions. All is well, now you can brush your teeth, take care of business and even lean close without fear something might fall on your head.

It's just a spider. You googled it later, and how common it is around the continents should be a bit ridiculous. Keeping it might equal to going on a beach and picking the most unremarkable pebble you see; Emory certainly could find hundreds more Daddy long-legs wherever he pleased - parks, gardens or forests.

So...why?

The question gnaws at you, together with that smile and cold grey eyes hidden behind glasses' frames. The weirdest part wasn't the expression, it was how you couldn't read it. Despite the obvious display of human emotion, however misplaced and alien, it failed to reveal anything. The smile was there, and yet nothing broke through it, not amusement, nor politeness - or any kind of feeling whatsoever.

Your neighbour is odd.

Not necessarily scary, though there's a sense of mystery surrounding him, it makes you feel like standing next to an iceberg and only seeing its tip. Or you've just read far too many psychological thrillers and your imagination likes to conjure up the wildest scenarios, trying to turn each and every thing into something sinister.

Maybe you should just chill and get some tea, and stop being so dramatic about a guy who came over and politely removed a spider for you.

They're not a unique species. Not even remotely uncommon.

He taps the container gently with his index finger, making the spider move back and forth. She doesn't have venom, no poisonous chemicals to injure and kill. Hiding in abandoned corners she does, patient and careful, waiting to catch the wrong fly.

You're just like her. Nothing exciting. Not unique.

Your movement patterns are similar, concealed in a different package you're still predictable: getting home from work, cooking dinner, watching TV shows. Everyday routines.

Fear is a part of your nature. Awkwardness which comes with socializing: you shuffle when uncomfortable, avoid prolonged eye contact and don't like confrontation, he noticed this right away. A quiet type, keeping mostly to yourself unless you need something urgently; and then you rush, like a scared Daddy long legs. There's this shiftiness, an inner desire to be less visible, but also a yearning for recognition because the lack of it hurts. And he saw all those small things, catalogued them one by one, as you moved into his street and became a constant presence.

Asa has never thought about keeping something - someone - so mundane before. Never. He likes rare things, spectacular, and those collected in the basement, they all are, especially when he's finished with them. They're extraordinary, displayed under glass cases and preserved for eternity.

He doesn't collect common species. Daddy long-legs are abundant everywhere around him.

But.

There's the way you linger by the kitchen window during the morning routine, slowly sipping hot coffee. When your lips purse and eyes lose focus for a moment. Or how the corners of them wrinkle sometimes when you have a genuine, amused laugh. It's something like warmth. There's no label for the feeling - positive, negative or neutral, it just is, like one single, meaningless element in an ecosystem.

He shouldn't want someone so average.

And yet Asa watches from the corner of your living room, crouched on the floor by a plant.

You don't hear him, too invested in your personal bubble. Well, he had enough time to polish his craft and figure out how soundless he can be when moving through spaces, how much weight he needs to place onto soles to avoid creaking wood and floorboards.

It's interesting to see you interact with your environment, unaware of being watched. There's an invisible pattern behind each action, even if you think everything is randomized. The web you wove around yourself is cozy, and Asa follows its threads while you check the phone and frown at whatever notification pops up. He is considering. Contemplating this impulsive desire he has yet to identify.

Would it be worth it? Keeping you. Adding you to the collection and seeing what comes out of it, how far his usual approach might take him with you in the same conditions. You're just a face with features. So...ordinary. He wants to pick you apart and look inside to make sure it's not some strange sort of mimicry, camouflage of a different nature hiding something else entirely.

There's this vague idea how those features may feel when touched. He can recall them accurately, even when you've never stood too close. Asa watches quietly from his hiding place, memorizing a displeased mumble and then a frustrated gesture.

You seem so alive.

Those below who are frozen in time now were too, before Asa decided to give them a purpose and make something special and worthy of his attention. They were alive like you, but now they're something better.

What purpose you have remains to be seen.

Asa decides then.

A plain trunk is nestled in the corner behind a coat hanger, no fancy latch or keyhole needed, only an ordinary padlock. You'll fit in nicely, squeezed in the cramped space, it won't be the most comfortable experience, but it's not for long and then...then he can show you the room where others stayed before, and where you'll be next.

Asa looks around one last time: the front door is locked, blinds down, lights off - you get up from the couch and head upstairs, right on the dot. Your house is easy to navigate despite the darkness; Asa knows his way around it, having been here already more than once. A step after a step he follows the soft padding of your bare feet, and when the steps halt, he pulls out a cloth. It's a heavy kind of pleasure to be able to stand right behind and admire your nape, there's a strange sort of vulnerability to it.

Something raw and very exposed.

It takes only a few movements, he catches your yelp into one of his hands and holds it clasped tightly as you thrash. Your nails dig into the fabric of his turtleneck but fail to leave any marks. He's never tired of it, the initial fear of his specimens realizing that their secure habitats are ruined. He doesn't mind this fight for survival.

"Shh," Asa breathes into your ear. "Shh."

The struggle doesn't last long - you're not a fighter - and when your body goes limp, he picks you up. Your perfume is surprisingly light, a very sweet and pleasant aroma, not overwhelming at all like he'd expect it to be.

It's nice.

He puts you in the trunk, a boxy space barely big enough to fit you curled on the side, it's going to take around thirty minutes to reach the hotel and another three to put you in the right cell. You'll sleep the rest of the journey, which is fortunate for everyone. It's always easier to deal with a specimen if they're resting.

The lock clicks softly - it's time to go home.

Something runs down your cheek - a drop, a bead of sweat, a touch - and you blink, trying to make sense of it. The surroundings are unfamiliar, blurry shapes with undefined outlines that stretch and wobble before your eyes. Your jaw hurts, clenched so hard that teeth grind together, and it takes a conscious effort to relax.

Where...what?

The living room, a TV program, a soundless whisper that froze the hairs at your nape, then someone was behind you. You remember a sickly sweet smell, and after that nothing but a haze and the dark, and the sensation of being squeezed into a shape. Your legs feel numb, arms too, like you spent hours immobile in one position. Slowly the world sharpens back into focus, but instead of relief there's only dread.

You're in a room.

No bigger than a regular bathroom and void of any furniture beside a cot-like bed, a toilet in the corner and a sink. The walls are a bluish-gray with thin cracks, tiny fissures that create uneven lines from the ceiling all the way down to the floor.

And there's a man, observing you quietly through the thick glass.

You don't notice him immediately, too busy assessing your new location, and when you do the air feels heavier, difficult to move past your throat. He's wearing a mask. Black rubber or something, covering everything except his eyes. He presses two palms against the barrier separating you, the silence stretches into an eternity.

'Who are you? What do you want?' - these are kind of questions you should be asking, but they don't come out. You remain glued to the spot, counting the passing seconds by their painful tick-tock-tick-tocks. One minute turns into two, and he...just stares without moving a muscle in a beyond unnerving manner. Your gaze dips lower to check his clothes, perhaps find a pattern to identify this person later.

There's none. Everything is plain black, like a uniform made to be invisible - turtleneck, pants, even gloves and boots.

It seems that your silence somehow pleases him, because a few moments later he leaves without looking back.

You don't know how much time passes; there's not a window around, only a bare, stark bulb, yellowish in its brightness and casting unpleasant shadows all over the floor. Not a single sound. Traffic, voices of distant passersby or birds - all is absent and doesn't provide even a bit of understanding where the hell you are.

In the end, you...sit down on the bed and wait, because what else is there? Everything is eerily silent and very, very uncomfortable: this emptiness, the absence of noise, the endless ticking of an invisible clock. It's difficult not to cry, but you try your best, somehow it feels important to remain composed. There has to be a reason behind this. There must be one, and you repeat it over and over, like a mantra to soothe the nerves and present your mind with some semblance of logic: once you figure out what's going on, you'll figure out how to get out as well.

Pulling loose threads from your sleeve is poor entertainment, if anything, the strain of boredom and unease gradually grows into anxiety so sharp that you almost miss the sound of approaching footsteps.

He's back again, the masked stranger who stands in the doorway with hands clasped behind his back. A pair of light grey eyes is a splash of different color, but they are blank. They watch with distant curiosity of an animal trainer monitoring a newborn cub. The comparison makes something ugly squirm inside you. A part of you wants to make a run for it, the other keeps yelling that it would be immensely stupid.

One, two, three, four steps he takes into your cell. Your back meets the wall, the chill coming from its solid surface cuts right through the layers of clothing. Five, six. He stops only when there's less than arm's reach between you, then leans to brush away loose strands of hair sticking to your temples. Your stomach goes taut. This scent. Laundry detergent mixed with soap. The turtleneck, grey eyes, very collected kind of Mister.

A sickly shiver of revulsion shoots down your spine, making you curl tighter into a ball. Emory cups your jaw with both hands - they're cold even through the gloves material. This is too close, an unwanted and unpleasant violation of boundaries, and yet he continues to examine your face, like you're some sort of an object he can handle however he pleases.

Your cheek gets a light pat. Any theories about his identity stay unvoiced, mostly because you fear the reaction they might prompt. Something tells you that screaming is a bad idea too. 'Be quiet,' an insistent whisper says deep inside your skull, 'be still.'

His thumbs press to the corners of your mouth. "Open," he orders, and you can't not, even though the whole thing sounds and feels bizarre. "Wider."

There's a quiet click. A flashlight, of those small ones you can easily hold in one hand, shines right into your eyes, making them water from the unexpected brightness. "Don't bite or I'll remove all of your teeth."

It's a simple threat, delivered with such a calm tone, there's no need for yelling when words are that clear and straightforward.

He inspects your mouth, the edges of teeth and gums, your inner cheeks, and you let him, clenching your fists. There's not much you can do, at least that's what you keep telling yourself to ease the heavy, sinking feeling of powerlessness. Your mind chants 'too close' on a loop, urging to wiggle away; you stay. It's unclear what exactly he's looking for - dental or oral diseases, a sore throat, cavities, or the lack of them?

It lasts forever until he straightens back up and puts the light away.

"Good," Emory states. There's another pat to your head before he turns around to leave. "No biting."

The door panel slides with a soft hum, locking shut. And the silence, and the waiting, and the mind numbing monotony is back again.

#shalott fanfiction #yandere #the collector #the collector (2009)#asa emory #asa emory x reader #slasher fanfiction #slashers

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lowkeyrobin · 6 months

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Hello lovely! I'm back with another request 😰 I was just wondering if you could do the handsome bros with an s/o with tattoos? Thank you! And as always I hope you have a great rest of your night/day🫶

ooooo yes of course!!! I loved doing this w quackity so doing this w them is gonna be fun :) ; and have a good day/night to you too 🫶 ; if you came back and see no tubbo, I don't write for him anymore and I'm slowly deleting stuff w him in it + if you request this group, there won't be any tubbo

HANDSOME BROS ; tattoos for days

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu

warnings ; language, talk about needles

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

bro the sleeves you got? holy shiet he's so swooned

always complimenting your tats & trying to get you to show them off

if you have any neck or back tattoos... good lord it's over, he can't not stare at them 24/7/365

he also likes coloring the hollow/non colored ones in with washable markers

you're a walking coloring book for him, he's gotta be moving all the time there is no break, even if he's chilled out

always taking sneaky pics of your tats up close LMAO

you take him to one (1) appt for a new tattoo and he's literally cringing in fear for you

like fuck you mean that's what you gotta deal with for the next six hours?? that needle is huge wth

he'll gladly help you with caring for it after though, but not without complaining about it all feeling weird on his fingers

"you better never suggest matching tattoos, there's no way I'm ever doing that"

RANBOO

again, you're a walking coloring book to them

definitely colors the same tattoos a million times and has a washcloth nearby for erasing lmao

also loves showing your tattoos off online and stuff

need a hand to squeeze when you're getting another? he's there, squeeze as hard as you need too lmao

relatively calm about the needles but are they getting one? hell no

theyre absolutely obsessed with any tats on your arms or neck, always zoning out looking at them lol

he tends to send you those tik tok reddit stories, mostly the tattoo fails ones 💀

"Jesus fucking christ how can you make a blowout that bad?"

"the tattoo wasn't even good in the first place either. cut it all off, start over"

they also like to hear you rant about tattoo stuff and recommendations, soft spots etc, not that they're getting any tattoos soon, they just like to learn shit

FREDDIE BADLINU

absolutely loves showing them off online because he's so proud, like this is such a fucking cool way to express yourself??? he's jealous bc no way he's getting a tattoo anytime soon

he's normal about the needles as long as it's not near him

he likes coming along w you when you get new tats because the place you go to has a little art station and you know the person who owns it and is totally fine with him using their art stuff

so while you're getting some fresh ink, Freddie's drawing with professional level utensils and having fun lmao

also the type to color your tattoos in when he's bored. he seems like he has the random urge to color but doesn't own coloring books because he'd never use them

also makes a playlist that reminds him of all your tattoos, one for each specific one and another for the fact you have tattoos and look badass

always showing you tattoos from pinterest like "omg that's so cool" and "dude color is insane"

also uses a sharpie to draw on your fingers when he's bored or a little anxious

and there's so many pictures of you/you together where you can see the sharpie as well 💔🫶

#lowkeyrobin #mcyt x reader #mcyt x gn reader #mcyt oneshot #mcyt preferences #tommyinnit oneshot #tommyinnit x reader #ranboo oneshot #ranboo x reader #freddie badlinu x reader #badlinu x reader #gn reader #gender neutral reader #they/them reader #handsome bros x reader

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m3l0v3trees · 4 months

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can I get a story about all 8 smiling Critters watching male!reader playing a fighting game and they all help him by telling him what moves to use and then they see him do a special finisher that they never seen and then after he won the smiling critters pick male!reader up and throw him up as they start to chant his name

Oooh!! Nice one dude/dudette! Gotta give ya credit there, pal! Anyways! Might as well do it for you. Besides I hate seeing people's requests turned down, so I hope you enjoy this

Winner! Hurray!

Let's start off with you! Yes, you! Let's just say, you're the game boy type, but still not a pro tho.

The critters were doing their own things like, craftycorn doing arts, catnap napping, dogday cleaning with bobby, kickin chicken and hoppy eating, while bubba and picky cooked.

And you? You're in the living room playing your favourite fighting video game.

As everyone finishes whatever they are doing, they hear you grunt loudly in the living throwing something too.

"uh... Should we check him?" Hoppy suggested.

Then a loud crash was heard, with no hesitation the critters came in the living room and saw you with an angry face as you continue to play the final boss of the game.

"Come on, you shit ass boss!" You shouted unaware of the others.

They sweat dropped watching you getting shit ass mad over a game.

"Angel! Language!" Dogday shouted making you yelp and look at his way only to not see him but with the others too.

You 'hmph' as you crossed your arms looked away with an angry pouty face that catnap found it cute (wink, wink)

After sometime talking it over they all decided that once in for all! They will help you with the game by telling you the combat moves.

You play the game with critters on each other side of you.

"Drop kick!" Kickin shouted.

"Double kick!"

"kick his feet!"

"Elbow the stomach!"

"punch his chin!"

Everyone kept shouting for combat moves while catnap just watched.

It took a good 30 minutes and finally! The boss has been defeated!

"We... We did it- WOAH!" You shriek getting lift up by the critters.

"you did it, Y/N!"

"Congratulations!"

"Snack time!"

"Be careful!"

"Mrr~"

"You won!"

"no... 'We' won!" You corrected.

They all smiled and gave you a group hug making you smile at the warmth of their body.

After a while you all decided to eat lunch. You felt grateful for having supportive friends with you. You would rather not trade them with anything...

Friends are the best!

A/N: phew! Welp! This was short but! Feel free to request me anything and anytime!

#dogday x reader #poppy playtime #smiling critters #smiling critters modern au #the smiling critters #catnap

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m-jelly · 2 years

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Levi X Reader where she makes horrendous jokes and stuff. Like just sitting at the table in the dining hall and someone says something outta line and reader is like “ Instead of being a little bitch, how about you go pull some for a change?” Or something like “ Hey I get why you’re such an asshole, I would be to if my dick was the size of a thumb.” It can really be any type of outta pocket joke. But how would Levi react to that. Can this be non established relationship so he is still trying to hide his admiration but when she says stuff like that it’s gets hard and he just full on laughs at one of her jokes one day infront of everyone

@kenkopanda-art <3

Funny joke

Pairing: Levi x Fem!Reader

Genre and tags: Canon world, fluff, hidden feelings, mutual pinning.

Concept: While gathered together in the dining hall, you are cracking your usual jokes and setting Hange and Mike off laughing. Levi enters the hall and notices you right away. He hurries over to take his spot next to you and enjoys how you rip into others. You crack one joke that sets him off laughing so hard that it shocks everyone.

Warning: There are some very rude and crude jokes and comments made by the reader.

Taglist: @levisbrat25 @ladycheesington @skittlelover69 @li-anne @nyxiieluna @notgoodforlife @galactict3a @youre-ackermine @thebobaprincess @nbinairyn @demonsimp6

Levi was exhausted and in desperate need of sleep. He wanted just to rest and he wanted you. Levi had strong feelings for you and had held them for a while now. He wanted to tell you how he felt but he wasn't sure how to go about it because he'd never felt this way about anyone before.

He released a long sigh as he dragged his heavy feet down the stone hall. He cringe a little when he heard the loud voices of cadets and fellow vets coming from the lit up doorway. He paused in his tracks and huffed another sigh as he got ready to face a rowdy bunch of people.

He turned the corner and saw the hall was full. He scanned the room with his tired steel blue eyes until his heart skipped a beat. He locked onto you as you grinned at Mike laughing hard. Levi felt a blush creep over his cheeks. He hurried through the hall and collected his food and tea.

You turned your head and smirked at Levi as he sat next to you. "Alright, Captain?"

Levi cleared his throat. "Lieutenant."

You winked at him before turning to Mike. "Seriously Mike, I'm pretty sure you're dealing with a tree in there. You'll knock a poor woman out if ya turn and she's on her knees."

Mike laughed. "You might be right."

Oluo clicked his tongue. "Do you have to be so crass?"

You smirked. "Why don't you stop sucking on Levi's towels to get his body fluids inside you so you can be him and just accept you have gnats dick so we can all move on with our lives. Honestly, it's getting a bit sad now."

Oluo blushed hard. "I'm not-!"

"Bet you snort his dandruff."

"I would never!"

You smirked and mocked his voice. "Oh Levi you taste so gooood."

Everyone started laughing hard, but one laugh seemed to cut through everyone. You all slowly turned to look at Levi laughing so hard he was crying. You blushed bright red at seeing the man you adored so much getting a kick out of your joking and banter.

Levi wiped his tears away and cleared his throat. "Sorry."

You smiled softly. "Don't be sorry. I'm honoured you find me funny."

He cleared his throat. "You're hilarious and very right. He does seem like he does all that."

You hummed a little laugh. "He does, right? I love your jokes too. You're so funny."

"Thanks." He felt so happy in his little world with you, but then he noticed a strong gaze on him. He slowly looked over to see Hange grinning at him. "Tch, fuck off four eyes."

You stood up and sighed. "Well, I'm off to my office. Thank you for the fun chats, but I gotta work."

Mike glanced at Levi. "Hm, Levi?"

Levi peeled his eyes from you walking away and looked at his tall friend. "Yeah?"

He nodded towards you. "Follow her. Go to her office and help her with paperwork. She's seen you in a different light. It's not or never."

Levi shot to his feet and nodded. "You're right. I'll go to her."

"I won't wish you luck because I know that the next time I see you both, you'll be a couple. So, see you soon."

Levi bowed his head a little. "Later."

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cielcreations · 8 months

Text

Hazbin Hermits - Prologue

AN: Hermitcraft/Empires/3rd Life Series X Hazbin Hotel AU.

Meaning lots of cursing, fighting, blood, violence, flirting, shipping, sexual innuendos/implied sexual content, and pretty much everyone is a bad person to some degree.

If you don't like your favorite characters made to be not so great people, then do not read.

"Good afternoon! I'm Katherine Killjoy!"

"And I'm Joey JaxHammer! Chaos outside pentagram city today, as a turf war is raging on the west side between notable kingpins Lord Fwhip and self-proclaimed spunky powerhouse Mythical Sausage!"

"That's right Joey! After the recent extermination, many areas are now up for grabs! Demons all over Hell are already duking it out to gain new territory!"

"Those two seem to be really going at it, huh?"

"Looks like they're fighting tooth and nail for that hotspot!"

"And I'd like to nail their hotspots, am I right, fellas~?"

"Haha, you are a limp dick jackass, Joey! Or should I say-" Katherine poured her hot coffee on his lap, the man hissing and moving before she could actually spill it on his dick, "-no dick?"

"Bitch." The man hissed.

"Coming up next, we have an exclusive interview with the younger son of Hell's own head honcho, who's here to discuss his brand-new passion project!"

"All that, after the break!" Joey exclaimed, taking his mug and pouring his coffee on Katherine's head.

"YOU LITTLE SH-"

The two looked away from the TV. The blue haired demon tugged the tie a bit tighter, just to make the prince look more presentable.

"Okay." He finished, stepping back, "Are you ready? You remember what to say?"

The blonde took a deep breath, his purple eyes widening in excitement as he exclaimed, "Yes! Let's do this!"

"Just, look at me, and I'll mouth it to you, Zed." The man grabbed the prince's shoulders.

Zed had light blonde hair with brown ram horns, pale skin, wearing a black suit with a red tie, no shoes so his hooves could breath.

"Ugh, come ooooon, Tango, I know what to say!" Zed reassured, smiling, "But, I do think we should make it a bit more interesting! I-I mean, I don't want to go up there and sound robotic, you know?"

Tango, normally, had yellow hair, that could change into different colors depending on how hot he got. Since he could control fire and such, his hair would change colors to match the fire type and, sometimes, it could even turn on fire. His skin was pale with a bit of a blue tint, his nails sharpened into claws. He wore a black crop top and black shorts, long black heeled boots. He also had black belts wrapped around his waist with golden buckles, black cloth to create an overskirt. (Art of Tango by @/lunarcrown)

"I get that, babe, but this is serious." Tango reminded him, "You can't go up there and squeal and giggle the whole time. It's adorable, yes, but not all sinners are going to trust and believe in your project unless you look serious and you know what you're doing."

"I told you through a fit of excited squeals."

"Yeah, and I listened because I know and believe in you." The demon motioned to the others, "These sinners don't. They don't know you, they barely know your older brother, and they certainly won't believe in you at first. It's why you gotta go up there, show them who's in charge, and act like this plan is full-proof!"

"But we don't know if it is..." Zed reminded.

"Your right, and neither do they." Tango booped his nose, "Which is our advantage. No one knows if this works, but if we act like we're the experts, people believe."

"Prince Zedaph? Five minutes before we're live." A demon called.

Tango smiled at the blonde, kissing his forehead, "You got this! I'll be right behind the camera, so if you need me?"

Zed nodded, smiling, "Don't worry, I got this!"

He turned around, walking to the desk and smiling, offering his hand, "Hi, I'm Zed-"

"Katherine Killjoy." The female anchor hissed, "You can put that away. I would say it's a pleasure to meet you, but that would be a lie." She then sneered, "Look, my time is money, so I'll keep this short. You're not here because we wanted you here. You're here because Jeffery couldn't make it to his cannibal cooking segment! You may be some royal bigshot, but that doesn't mean shit to me! I'm too rich and influential to giving a flying fuck about some tux wearing demon 'prince'-" (she put "prince" in quotations, as if Zed wasn't one) "-wants to advertise."

Zed narrowed his eyes, "Listen-"

Katherine leaned forward, glaring, "So don't get cute with me, or I'll fucking break you!"

"And we're live!"

Katherine zoomed to her seat, tilting her head so much, it sounded like she broke it, "Welcome back!" Once Zed was sat down, she spoke again, "So, Zedaph!"

The blonde's eyes twitched as he smiled awkwardly, "It's Zed-"

"Whatever! Tell us about this new passion project you've been insistently pestering our news station about!"

"Welllllll..." Zed looked around at the demons, Tango standing by the camera man with a smile and thumbs up. He smiled and took a deep breath as he spoke, "As most of you know, I was born here in Hell and growing up, I tried to see the good in everything around me. Hell is my home and you are my people. We just went through another extermination and we lost so many souls! It breaks my heart seeing my people being slaughtered every year!" He slammed his fist on the table, sighing, "No one is even given a chance and I can no longer stand idly by when the place I call home, the place I love, is constantly being destroyed!"

He stood up, smiling, "So, I've been thinking, isn't there a more humane way to hinder Hell's overpopulation? Perhaps we can find a new alternative way to save souls through redemption? I think yes, and that's what this project aims to achieve! Ladies and gentlemen and everyone in between, I'm opening the first of its kind! A hotel that rehabilitates sinners!"

Everyone was silent, staring at the man.

Everyone outside stared at the TV.

One in particular tilted his head in curiosity.

Everyone in the news station... started laughing.

Zed shrunk in on himself as Tango moved to stand beside him, his blue hair turning into flames as he glared at everyone.

"What in the nine circles makes you think a single person in hell would give two shits about becoming a 'better person?!'" Katherine cackled, "You have no proof that this actually works and you want people to be good just because?!"

"You have no proof it doesn't work!" Tango hissed, flames surrounding his body, "Besides, we already have a patron who's showing incredible improvement!"

"Ooooooh, and who might that be~?" Katherine sneered.

Tango leaned forward, intentionally burning her wooden table with a smirk, "Oh, just someone named, SmallishBeans."

"The pornstar?" Joey asked.

"You fucking would, Joey." Katherine glared before snickering, "In any case, that's hardly an accomplishment! I'm sure you can get that hooker to do anything with enough lube and sugar!"

Tango continued to burn her table, the woman looking ready to scratch his eyes out as he drew little doodles, "I beg to differ."

Zed also perked up, smirking, "He's been behaved, clean, and out of trouble for two weeks now!"

"Breaking news!"

Katherine perked up before she smirked, pushing the men away, "We just received word that a new player has entered the ongoing turf war! Let's go to the live feed!"

They turned to the TV and Tango pinched his temples as he tried to control himself, Zed muttering out, "Oh shit."

"Oh shit, indeed!" Katherine exclaimed, "It appears the one to join is none other than porn actor Joel, aka, SmallishBeans!" She looked at the two, "What a juicy coincidence! I bet you feel real stupid right now! How does it feel to be a total and utter failure?!"

She began laughing, everyone did, once more.

Tango tried to control himself as Zed clenched his fists.

The prince looked at Tango with glowing red eyes, "Fucking, show them who's boss."

Tango smirked, his teeth sharpening to points, "Gladly."

He jumped across the table, lighting everything on fire as he began to beat Katherine and Joey.

***

The prince and his boyfriend sat in a limo, across from the other sinner. The sinner had brown hair with a green streak in the middle of his hair, matching his green eyes and green antenna. He wore a long white and light green suit blazer, the top unbuttoned and showing off his muscular chest. He had black shorts and long, knee length black heeled boots. To top it off, he had green transparent fairy wings on his back.

They watched as he rolled the window up and down, clearly in his own little world. Eventually, he seemed to notice the two were staring at him.

The brunette stopped, leaned back, and shrugged, "What?"

"'What?' 'WHAT?!'" Tango screamed, his hair turning to blue, almost purple flames, "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, JOEL?!"

"Ugh, I had too, I owed Sausage a solid!" Joel huffed, "Isn't that one of those 'redeeming qualities'? Helping friends and all that?!"

Zed leaned into the window with a groan as Tango reprimanded him, "Not in turf wars that result in genocide?!"

"Meh, you win some, you loose a few hundred!"

"Joel, that was really not cool." Zed groaned, "You just... You made us look like jokes!"

"Nah, chill out, jokes are funny! I made you all look sad and pathetic!"

"Oh, cause that's any better?!" Tango growled.

"Look, I had to!" Joel argued, "My reputation was on the line! You know what people would say if they found out I was trying to go clean?! Not to mention, people would know where I am and try to break into the hotel to get some of me! Do you want a whole mob down there?"

"Listen, if you want to stay here, you need to take this shit seriously!" Tango demanded, walking towards the brunette, "We're not going to give you a free room, free food, free whatever else if all you do is fuck around! So, you either sit down, buckle the fuck up, and try to redeem yourself and help the hotel's reputation, that you burned to cinder!" He glared, flames coming out of his mouth, "Got it?"

Joel groaned, "Okay, fine, whatever."

"C-Calm down, Tango." Zed offered his hand, Tango moving to sit beside him again, "I-It's not over yet, we can still try! It'll be okay!"

The limo stopped at the hotel and the three went inside. Tango flopped on the couch with a groan, Joel grabbing a popsicle and sitting in a chair. Zed groaned and went to go upstairs, only to stop.

Someone knocked on the door.

He walked towards it and opened the door.

In front of him stood a tall dirty blonde man with his eyes closed, wearing a blue striped coat with dark blue sleeves, the coat falling to his knees. Underneath the coat, he wore a white dress shirt with a black upside down cross on the chest, as if to resemble a tie, long black dress pants with bright blue cuffs. Over his feet, he wore black heeled boots that rested under his pants. Behind his back, he held a long thin cane with a sentient vintage style microphone attached to it.

The whole time, he smiled.

Zed shrunk a little as the man opened his eyes. He had black sclera with blue eyes, staring down at the prince.

"HELLO!" He spoke, his voice altered to sound like that of a broadcast.

Zed shut the door on instinct, "Uh, Tango?"

"Whaaaaat?" The flame demon groaned.

"The Radio Demon is at the door!"

#hermitcraft #hermitshipping #empires smp #empireshipping #third life series #third life smp #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel au #hermitcraft au #empires smp au #empires au #third life smp au #zedaph #tangotek #solidaritygaming #joel smallishbeans #smallishbeans

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wannabemasterofwindintraining · 4 months

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Hi yes sorry to bother really quick question though uhm when you draw a human head do you draw put the the uh the circle thing that displays the top the head and then draw a chin oooor no?

If not what do you start with when you draw someone? And also how do you draw hair? I love the way you draw it and I am literally struggling sm w/ my art style(?? Idk Ik i don like it much tho) atp and wanna know what you do when you draw...and you seem like yk what ur doing so... yaaaaa thank youu! :3

Haii don't worry you're not bothering at all ^_^

To answer your question well i don't really draw the full circle usually i just draw circle heads but when I'm not doing that i like to try n get the chin shape as I'm drawing the head

Like this

After that i like to finish Woking on the head before moving on to the body

It can sometimes be a problem when you start drawing the body n you realise that maybe you need to resize or move the guy so you'll have to erase the head you already finished but if you're drawing digitally you don't have to worry about it 👍

I usually finish the face then draw the hair n neck but the order doesn't matter do whatever you want

There's a lot of different ways to draw the body n you can use whatever technique is easier for u but for me i like to start w the shoulders n do some chest n back lines

They don't have to be accurate just a general shape to indicate the body type/pose you're doing

Once i add the arms i start doing some fixes to the body

The arms make it more coherent all together so you start to see what issues can be fixed in the general shape of the body or maybe even the position of the shoulders or the pose

Once the guy looks right you can hide all your hard work w some clothes

Then yea i just add some last details like clothes folds n stuff n also go back to fix some lines that don't look right just erase as much as u want till the guy looks decent enough

As for the hair i just do general shapes i can never figure out how to do the detailed hair with all the individual strands rendered so this is the best i can do

I have some general strand shapes i like to use every style gotta have one of these

I like to start w the bangs then draw the rest of the hair sometimes if the drawing is too tiny i won't draw the bangs at all just do whatever till u get a shape you like 👍

Also for the artstyle thing if you're not happy w how your art looks i advice trying new styles

For me i have my little lap rat blorbo who i draw every time i wanna try a new style or technique

Look at other artists n pick out certain aspects you like about their style n try to replicate it if you're vibing w the style or technique then good for u king(gender neutral) draw that all the time 👍

Don't worry about changing ur style either even after u found a style you like it's always fun to experiment w new stuff n who knows you might even develop a new style that u like even more

Just have fun bestie do whatever brings u joy

Anyways i talked too much be gay do spinjitzu or whatever ✌️

#blue's doodles

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coeluvr · 9 months

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Hello dearest!

I don't usually write messages because I have weird, shy internet anxiety, but I wanted to make an exception because compliments always motivate me to keep writing and I need u to keep writing so I can finally h*ld Vincent's h*nd!!! 😔😭🤡

This is one of the few IFs where I actually want to romance all ROs!!! Usually, I have a few I really want to romance and the rest I slog through cause completionist tendencies. But you've done a wonderful job of not only making the characters feel very alive and dynamic but also making them all appealing and attractive.

I usually always want to romance the hater because pettiness fuels me but also love angst with a kill them with kindness mc (I WILL H*LD VINCENTS H*ND OR DIE FIGHTING GOD). So, confirmed Vincent-mancer. His art? HIS EYES. HIS LIPS. PRETTY PRIVELEGE IS REAL AND ALL CRIMES ARE EXCUSED (also I really tried going into it being like he's not sad!!! But, as someone who's been in that place, while not an actual war, he definitely comes across as sad in the sense of a weariness at life and that he's struggling to fit back into his skin as pre-trauma Vincent. Artist did a 10/10 job with all the art because THEY'RE SO BEAUTIFUL I CREYYYY)

But the chokehold Hunter has on me? They were gonna be first because their personality is appealing to me both fictional and irl but omg everything I read I HAVE TO HAVE MORE. Like it's moved beyond I'd definitely vibe with this character and look forward to their route to i WANT TO SMOOCH THEIR PRETTY FACE OFF. So now confirmed Hunter-mancer (I actually died on the tattoo snippet on patreon is it a good or bad day to be bi?)

Helios kind of types I'm more of a 50/50 with, but obviously gotta do it for the juicy drama. But all stuff with him has just been so ??!!!???😳😳🫠 like he just leaves me more intrigued. Confirmed Helios-mancer. (The amount of times I'm gonna replay his route to try different things is actually gonna be crazy)

Soarine hot women nuff said. But also just ???!!!?!? I can't even form words. I'm so excited for more scenes with her. Confirmed Soarine-mancer. (Ma'am pls step on me respectfully and not so respectfully)

Fadiya as the official best friend (Hunter you're a bestie too but I feel bad like I'm making u choose between me and Helios :((( ) is usually one I'd keep strictly platonic. I love platonic routes as much as romance and nothing grabs me more than having a best friend character in IFs. BUT SHES SO ADORABLE. I WANNA SMOOSH HER CHEEKS. Also I feel her cause I'm that oblivious too 😭😭😭 I always appreciate ifs having the shy and bold type flirting but I need an oblivious idiot one because I'd be accidentally flirting with her like I do with all my friends without realizing I'm in love with her (and then be unable to speak to her once I realize because flirting? With people that aren't just platonic friends??? That I have feelings for????? Sounds fake). I gotta write the fanfic now (and perhaps share with u once I get over my shyness)

I really am looking forward to the next chapter! I'm so glad I subscribed on patreon too :))) keep up the good work (it also motivates me to cure my depression and post my stuff too)

💙💙💙💙💙

This is so sweet, anon 🥺 Thank you for sending me this message!!

I'm so glad all of the ROs are appealing to you! I love them all so much they're all beautiful and have so much to their stories. 🥰

Vincent's pretty privilege is insane lmao so many people folded when they saw him 😭 I guess Vincent's inner sadness seeped through because he's really okay #trust but then I probably have a wildly different definition of okay haha very low standards of living over here. He was also never trauma free lol my man just going through it. 🤭

I understand your love for Hunter!! They are just very... very. The tattoo part is one of my favs too they're so smooth with it like okay you're popular with everyone we get it 🙄 *cries to sleep*

Helios is super interesting to me because of the way he handles things and his mindset like I need to study him under a microscope. His route will definitely fulfill all your desires for drama! 🥳

Soarine hot woman. Real. She can ruin my life any day.

Fadiya is perfection and a gift from the gods because she's just so 🥹🥹 I love her to bits and she's going to be so fun to write.

Thank you for your kind words! I love these kind of messages so you're right hehe. Definitely gave me a boost! 💗

#coe answers

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kirby-the-gorb · 3 months

Text

reply roundup!

man apparently these are still hard even when I'm not Literally Dying anymore :v

the sad sale went great, thank you for all the support everyone <3 I bought shelves and makeup and paper star papers and stickers and a new blanket, plus it's helping cover my allowance until my wife starts getting paid. I am already thinking I might do another sale in november just for fun lol

my wife has started orientation at her program and she's having a great time, our partner and I are gonna go down to visit her in a couple weeks :) I also finished rearranging all my furniture now that her furniture isn't here and it only made me terribly ill once!

I am really enjoying everyone singing along on [live and learm], I love enthusiasm <3

on [stars] @korattata said: HEY THATS WHAT I'VE BEEN DOING ALL DAY!!!!! i just started learning last night! its a nice break at work to stop looking at the computer screen. they all still look a bit wonky and i think one of the sheets of paper is too thick but i'm just using paper i got from the supply closet and cut with the paper cutter lol

aw that's so cool! the ones that are like actually packaged for making paper stars are usually a bit thinner than printer paper, like other origami paper, but that also means they tear a lot more easily in the first step if you're not careful, so it's always a tradeoff. what a fun coincidence :>

on [hallway] @thesilentpotato said: the first thing i thought of was the "da dee la da dee la da" krabby patty zoom in scene from spongebob

lol I hadn't thought of that until you said it but you're so right (she is referencing [this scene] from the krusty krab training video for anyone unfamiliar)

(side note thank you to folks who put pronouns in easily findable places so I can refer to you correctly even if I don't know you <3 )

on [birthday] @joekingv1 said: *asks baby what gifts they received and if they would like to read/watch Komi Can't Communicate*

I never really got into komi because one of the side characters really squicks me out, but I have a friend that really loves it, so maybe they've watched it with her! I think they probably got to go somewhere fun for their birthday like a theme park or a zoo, and get a souvenir plush while they were there -u-

on [sheep] @ceylonsilvergirl [added] a different line for kirby, which I still think about regularly lol

on [pills] @minty-spice said: op i hope your health improves and your empire of pills eventually shrinks

thank you <3 honestly I'd be happy with just the first one, I don't mind all the pills so much as long as they're actually helping.

on [crackers] @amatsuki said: made a bunch of cold noodles today with cucumber carrot chicken & sesame peanut soy sauce. the only actual cooking i had to do was boil water and steam chicken

oh hell yeah cold noodles are a fantastic example of a basic food to go feral over. now I want noodles too.........

on [thinking] @adrawrable said: hope you're cozy op

not right now as I type this because it is Computer Work Time, but in general I am So Cozy these days, I have a whole queen bed to myself so it's full of big stuffed animals and fluffy blankets :) (tbh even once my wife moves back here we may just all have individual beds we all seem very comfy this way lol)

on [slam] @jeaniechibi said: we'll be right back ➡️ shshgdtsudtdidh why is every bit of art with a blurr effect so damn funny 🤣

it truly is, I love a thoughtfully applied motion blur (or perspective blur can be funny too) (altho tbh I don't use the perspective blur tool for those I just use separate layers and gaussian blur) (for anyone unfamiliar this is a reference to the eric andre show meme)

on [beehive] @galacticnova3 said: me @ wasp nests minus the frowning, little fellas doing their little fella activities. sometimes they squabble. the thinking man’s reality tv drama

true, true, gotta love little fella activities. personally I feel better observing from a safe distance, but we had a lot of wasps around my childhood home and I didn't really know how to get friendlier than not actively making them mad lol

anonymous asked: That profile is amazing

for some reason I don't feel like I understand, but thank you!

on [sale] @milkymoon-ramblings said: gahh why do so many people have so many cool probducts, the queers are tempting me with their cool swag. however I need to save money for my own cool swag (digital art)

I just love the phrase "the queers are tempting me with their cool swag", so relatable lol (also no worries to anyone who couldn't or didn't want to buy anything, it's not like I needed it to pay bills I just wanted treats :v )

on [solstice] @jaune-chat said: Definitely, the sun can fuck right off. I break into a rash if I get too much sun, and I can't walk outside without full body coverage to some degree or be itching for WEEKS! In order of preference, is fall, winter, spring, summer.

oof yeah my mom gets a bad rash from sun exposure too! I'm fortunate to not have that specific symptom, but dang it seems so inconvenient, especially if you're also sensitive to heat so being covered up puts you at additional risk. personally I rate winter a little higher than fall but otherwise yeah total agreement lol

on [rollerskates] @nexus-nebulae said: @ prev tags i used to daydream constantly about being able to roller skate everywhere because i would constantly think 'rolling would be way easier than dragging my feet everywhere rn' and it took me two months of constantly thinking about that before i realised OH i need a ROLLATOR that would help (<- i am not smart) i haven't actually tried roller skating bc i don't own skates but i have used a skateboard briefly and that also feels better than walking. i wonder.... if the roller skating rink nearby would allow me to use a rollator in the rink with skates on........ probably not lmao

honestly it takes so much to actually realize like "oh a mobility aid might help with this" which is like, a bad thing, but we're just gonna focus on the funny part for now happy disability pride month :v and tbh I think maybe they might let you do it??? cuz like at ice skating rinks they usually have those little penguins or just straight up plastic lawn chairs for people to support themselves on, so I don't think it would be that crazy to go out on the rollarink with a rollator? but also that's just me and I do not run the place or get paid minimum wage to keep people from breaking the place sooo lol

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agent-cupcake · 6 months

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any advice to a new fanfic writer? i love to write but i feel like it takes a ton of energy. is that just because I’m new? thanks in advance, i am equally inspired and intimidated by your work!

AH YES another episode of the blind leading the blind let's goooo

Writing does take a lot of energy like I imagine any art does. For me, it still does, I'm just a tiny bit better at managing that energy because I've been at it for five-ish years.

Taking inspiration is good, very good actually. Read, watch movies, listen to music, absorb art and let that fuel you. BUT BUT BUT the only person you can be compared to is your past self so if you're just getting started you're actually beyond comparison.

There is no reason to care about what people say about the type of stuff you want to write, they have ant opinions and you are the god of a new world.

When you open a blank document, do not have a stare down with that endless white oblivion and contemplate why you're even alive. Make it your bitch. Write out everything you can with the incoherently drunk violence of a deadbeat boyfriend whose TV just broke, really let her have it. Are they good words? Who cares! You have defeated the snowstorm purgatory that is an empty doc, now you can try and forge something out of that chaos.

Look. I don't think people recommend this and maybe it's bad practice but find a thesaurus you like and use it. I'm giving you permission. Those "said is dead" posts are a bit cringe and I think using action tags between dialogue or describing the tone of voice/expression is more effective but sometimes you really reach a point where you've used "splendid" like six times in two paragraphs and you gotta move on. Personally I like Power Thesaurus. There are also websites you can use to check for repeated words which I find helpful.

If you can, find somebody to help read your stuff with you. It's super cursed but I've also plugged stuff into AI reading websites just to try and check for errors. Listen to the robot read your smut. Let your spirit leave your body. Suffer. I am a terrible editor (lazy editor) though so take that as you will.

Write as much as you can. That's it. You could get all the advice in the world and it won't matter unless you're doing it.

Good luck!

#personal

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ghostlysleuth · 8 months

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I follow you on twitter & all I gotta say is, I love the diversity in your drawings so much, I hate when people make girls all stereotypes & your art makes me feel so comfortable it’s like a warm feeling not to mention your nsfw art. It doesn’t just show the list it shows the love & affection each character has for eachother it shows how intimate & hot the moment can be but also sweet? I’m not sure I love your art too much it really makes my day to see it, but any tips on anatomy?♥️

thank you so much!! i totally get what you mean by a list, that really is what diversity can feel like sometimes. my weight and figure have fluctuated so much over the years and i've gotten enough shit from family about eating habits and how chubby i've gotten, to the point of dysmorphia, and turning to art (and not to mention seeing the vast majority of fat butch rep) to remedy it has done wonders for my body image, and i'm really glad people like how i do things.

in terms of tips, as someone who went to school for this sorta thing, i'm gonna try to make this as accessible as possible aka free resources.

timed figure drawing!

legit, you gotta draw naked people posed in intricate ways. there's literally no avoiding it, you have to draw from life and not from tutorials. obv, i'm not saying go out and attend a life drawing course -- that's expensive shit -- so here's a few options:

i use a site called quickposes, since most figure drawing galleries require subscriptions.

you can set a timer for how long you want on each pose/reference. i recommend challenging yourself with shorter times as it helps you to get rid of any hang-ups about getting the anatomy exactly right. the drawing's got to get done by the end of the timer, don't focus on the details. just draw, be done with it, move on to the next drawing.

there's also a youtube channel that we'd use in class when a model couldn't show called new masters academy and they have a bunch of timed daily drawing exercises.

as a general rule, don't lean on the amount of time you have. what you're wanting to do is get a FULL PICTURE on your paper as soon as possible, regardless of a long or short time. get the full figure onto the paper then use the rest of the time to fuss over details, shading, editing, etc.

do studies!

kinda similar to the last one but in the more time-consuming sense.

use pinterest. it has a lot of uses for a lot of things but i use it quite a bit for both anatomy refs and costume design inspiration. this is legit what my home page looks like now because of it.

here's a board i made on anatomy, pulling from different body types; obviously i get a little gay wid it, but there's a verrrryyyy clear lack of certain body types in a lot of body refs like muscular women, fat women, just overall people who higher fat content than the lean, almost 0% fat of the figures seen in most tutorials and galleries:

this is where pinterest really shines because you can find literally everything on it.

in particular, there's an account called character design references, that is basically a stockpile of references for artists. i wouldn't normally recommend artist tutorials when it comes to wanting to learn anatomy because it can get a little echo-chambery (side-eyes the male vs. female tutorials that float around on twitter all the time) but there are actually some boards that have genuine studies on the human form, even from a medical point of view.

LITERALLY JUST DRAW A LOT.

I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH IT'S GONNA TAKE A LOT OF TIME AND PRACTICE TO GET TO A CERTAIN LEVEL OF SATISFACTION.

like that's it, full stop, draw often. if you're feeling rusty, go back to basics. if you're art blocked, go back to basics. if you're bored, go back to basics.

#ask #anatomy #anatomy tips #talkies #drawing should be about having fun first and foremost #i find figure drawing fun because of how quickly it gets done #art advice

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thisfeelingyourname · 8 months

Text

knife twist.

they've really gotta stop meeting like this.

bill kaulitz x roman reigns smut. | 1.3k words | minors dni

cw: post break up sex, fluff, dirty talk, a lil angst. 🥰

"Is it a good thing that I called you back?" Bill asks this with a smile, a genuine innocence about it, brown eyes settling on the slow form of a smirk curving on Roman's face, both men laying side by side on the lush bed of what seems like Roman's millionth hotel room. This all feels so familiar to the both of them, this kind of being together. Neither of them want to wonder where it all went wrong, not right now, this moment is too sweet for that. Roman lifts a gentle hand, softens it against the warmth of Bill's cheek, caressing it.

The gesture moves Bill to close his eyes, butterflies swelling up wild in his chest. "Look at me, baby," Roman says quietly, other hand finding itself up beneath the slip of Bill's sleep shirt, goosebumps flowering up into his touch. This is too good, too tender and Bill wonders amusedly when the bad twin is going to show up, grinning and wicked. They look at one another again and the fire snakes down between them, need splitting them delicately open.

Roman never answers him, not that Bill cared to hear what he had to say anyway. He likes his mouth hot against his much better, kissing and kissing and kissing him, his fingers scouring themselves through blond strands. It's better this way, Roman wasn't much of the talk it out type when they first met. "I can show you way better than I can tell you, baby boy," he would always say, superstar flash of a smile and a kiss to the crown of Bill's head. The golden boy act would be enough to settle the first upset, then the second, then the third, but somewhere between the fourth, the tenth and the final upset it lost its charm.

They love each other, though.

Bill knows that. Roman knows that, too. They are doomed together, from the body to the bone. Roman realized that later than sooner, but wanted to make peace with Bill after the fact, inviting him to meet up with him after one of his shows. He wasn’t surprised to see that he agreed, showing up at his door soon after. "So you're a bad guy now," Bill had said with a wry smile, chin cradled in the palm of his hand as he sits on the hotel bed, watching the big dog bask in his newfound glory, the irony not lost on either of them. Glad his boy is still observant as ever Roman beamed, raised his arms in mock defeat, the glow of the evening sun crowning him like a king. "Art imitates life," he proclaims.

They share a laugh at that, the wound laughing right back at them.

The sex is divine, so fucking good it feels like both of them have died and gone to heaven. Roman can't remember the last time he's gotten head this great before. Bill is doing all of the right things, on the floor on his knees where he always should be, pretty lips slicked sweet with precome and saliva as he moans against Roman's dick, teasing his tongue stud along the shaft. The sensation swarms butterflies in Roman's belly, words of praise leaving breathlessly from his lips while he threads his fingers through Bill's hair, twisting and pulling at sensitive roots, the bed creaking as he slow rocks his hips against Bill's mouth. "So good… so fucking good, baby," he whispers, fingers still running lovingly through golden strands. Bill nods his head, fisting Roman's dick as he does his own after he lets Roman’s fall from his mouth with a wet pop, his heart bursting with pride. He dips his tongue stud on the slit, swirling it lazily around before bringing his dick into his mouth once more, love in his eyes when he looks up to see Roman watching him, beautiful and proud. It nearly brings him to tears.

The bad twin finally arrives and Bill is excited to see him, happily flat on his back and anxious, his toes curling and his heart pounding with anticipation as he watches Roman get onto the bed, all of that muscle and body and god looming over him like fate. This isn't something they can run from anymore, they are each other's end game. It works for Roman who seats himself between Bill's spread legs, his gaze lost in that beautiful place before he forces himself to look at Bill, love still pretty in his eyes and he leans over to him and brings a kiss to his lips, lingering and kind. "'m gonna fuck you now, okay?" he murmurs, his gaze steady with Bill’s own. "'kay," Bill whispers, entire body throbbing with ache.

It feels like coming home when Roman pushes into him for the first time, Bill's head falling gracefully back into the pillows, a blissful smile spread across his lips as Roman claims him, strong arms on either side of Bill, fucking into him until stars flicker in Bill's vision. It's unbearable, every nerve twisting up tight with pleasure and Bill fights to meet him with every move, grinding down on Roman's dick, his hips turning in time. Roman responds to him by slowing the pace, purposefully dragging his dick all the way out and then pushing back in, causing Bill to groan fitfully in frustration, rushing his hands through his hair as he swears through his teeth.

Roman smirks, feeling victorious and pleased with Bill's dramatics. "Gonna be a brat for me tonight, huh?" he teases, merciless and still managing the torturous rhythm between them. A venomous glare greets him then and Roman has the audacity to laugh aloud, leaning over to Bill once more to run his mouth over sweat slicked skin, kissing Bill's cheek, the crown of his head, the bump of his nose, his lips before Bill decides to be selfish, taking him in and locking his legs right around Roman's waist, keeping him there in that perfect place and the bad twin grins at that, wicked and free before Roman obliges, picking up the pace and burying himself balls deep inside of Bill, turning him out until he's a gorgeous mess of pleading and gasping and yes yes yes fuck me just like that.

The feeling of fucking Bill is absolutely euphoric to Roman, everything of him sinking into everything of Bill, burning and made to merge, the orgasm rising up higher and higher. Roman loves when Bill watches him fuck him, eyes wide open and brilliant, adoration pouring from his gaze, those pretty lips parted in awe. Then he says Roman's name so softly, repeats it like prayer, again and again as he fucks him harder, deeper like a domino effect, the ending between them always the same, Bill's nails scarring blood into Roman's back and Roman wincing through it, loving Bill through it until the orgasm hits and Bill falls beautifully apart, crying out for him, his body writhing up desperately into Roman's, riding out the high before Roman finishes up inside him, burying his face into the heat of Bill's throat, groaning, his body burning electric from release then he collapses on top of him, the buzz fleeing as quickly as it had arrived.

The room is silent then, nothing but the hum song of the air conditioner and the rise and fall of breathing. It's true intimacy, this moment, Bill's fingers idly scratching the back of Roman's neck in affection, other hand pressed flat against his back holding him close. His dick is still inside of him and neither of them wish to change that, Roman's face still resting in the crook of Bill's shoulder, lids shut in fatigue. "Love you, chief," Bill mumbles, sleepy voiced and glad. Roman draws in a breath and exhales, smiling against warm skin. "Love you too, baby boy."

And the wound stops laughing.

#writing.#wwe fanfiction #tokio hotel fanfic #bill kaulitz smut #roman reigns smut #roman reigns fanfiction #tokio hotel fic #wwe smut

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yuurivoice · 1 year

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How do you feel about some people seeing Auron as a low-key Yandere?

I don't feel any type of way because people are free to interpret art in a wide variety of ways, it's none of my damn business, and "criminal who literally nailed a man to a desk and had him shot to death" is not much of a stretch to picture him in a yandere light.

Yall gotta assess your views of creators and why you might or might not care what they think of your headcanons. You do not need my approval and I'm not going to go out of my way to finger wag an internet stranger who is having fun with a fictional character of mine in a harmless way.

Also, as a creative, you gotta come to a place of peace with people potentially giving your work a poorly realized characterization. People have had ooc interpretations of fictional characters on the internet since Day 1 and I don't have the time, energy, or desire to look into it. It's a blessing that people give a shit in the first place.

So...yeah man. I don't feel any type of way about it and encourage people to care less about my personal approval. If what you're doing isn't deliberately harming anyone or egregiously misrepresenting my work in a way that would be slanderous or harmful...I legit just want people to have fun.

P.S. We as internet people should also care less about other people's interpretations of characters. We're all playing pretend with words as building blocks. If someone plays in ways you don't like, just keep moving and do something that brings you joy vs stewing in negativity.

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veradragonjedi · 11 months

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ok since i know you as the excellent writer mutual, i wondered if you had any advice for creating ocs? one of my other moots asked if i had any ocs and now i REALLY want to create one. but it looks hard af. so turning to a venerable author for guidance

OHHHHH GOD. First of all, I gotta thank you for the description (😭 seriously), I'm trying my best out here.

SECOND. I think I might be able to help, depending on what sort of OC you're trying to make, whether they're real world, fandom related, alien, D&D/Medieval Fantasy etc. Like. WOAH. There's a lot of freedom in making OCs!!!

Long-ish post below the cut!

Instead of actually wracking my brains rn, because evening is drawing in and I'm tired, I am gonna tell you a few things that no one told me! Plus some extra fun knowledge (and maybe tag you in OC dialogue prompts/creation advice in future if you want some help!!)

SO. 1. You can start whenever, wherever, and no one is allowed to tell you otherwise. I'm not sure how else to say this, but it's a game of creativity and a bit of love. To tell someone else what they're allowed and what they aren't allowed to put in their OCs is WRONG. Give them magic powers if that's the only thing you can think of at first, because it's a start and a start is always beautiful.

2. Art is art!! Even if it stays in your brain and never comes out. By this I mean, appearances: what do they look like? Is it what You want to look like? Is it nonhuman? Experiment with races, hairstyles, eyeshapes etc, especially if you're gonna end up drawing them!! More practise, and it's fun, because it's something/someone that You are Interested in. Hopefully I'm making sense here!

3. Names. Oh god, baby name websites won't help you. But fantasy generator names can! They are often much better and more exciting. Back to separate cultures ^ — looking for famous people of the culture/race of your OC can sometimes be of assistance, or sometimes unofficial Census sites. Names can also be objects, plants, celestial bodies, Gods, colours, metals/elements, etc. Maybe, with a few letters missing. Chair -> Chaise, Tablet -> Tebley (two I came up with a while ago and didn't really go into)

4. Clothes! I love researching clothes because they're always interesting to analyse, especially if they come from somewhere else around the world. Experiment with colours, what works/doesn't work with your character? Is your character neat, tidy? Show that through their clothes! Primmed and pressed suits and whatnot. Same goes for the opposite. If your character's main trait is that they're agreeable and friendly, show that through their clothes even slightly by making the colours blend, maybe make their favourite colour limited on the outfit as if they're moving it to make way for others. Think about shape, silhouette, etc. Do the clothes fit your character's particular body type? Their habitat? Their scene/time? :)

5. Personality!! This is always great. For a few of my OCs, I rolled them D&D stats with a twenty-sided dice. The five I ALWAYS take into account are: joy — what brings them it, romantic interest — or sometimes lack thereof, sadness — do they often fall into it? Are they easily emotional? Etc, fear — what are they afraid of and why? Etc, and lastly, charisma/charm — how easily are people to follow them, want to be friends with them, fall in love with them, want to listen to them speak?

(5.5) Flaws! Everyone's got em, aside from Mary Sue (who could be Your character. I'm not judging.) There are plenty of posts talking about character flaws. Here's one I saw earlier. It explains it better than I could, and OP leaves another link! Think about how much it grates against their defining 'Good' quality, think about whether you would see them as a good or bad person, and whether their flaws change how other people perceive them.

6. Hobbies aren't an important factor exactly, but it's always nice to plan your Little Guy some downtime. What do they do when it's quiet or when they're lonely? Do they have many friends, or do they keep to themselves? What's their favourite book? Their favourite video game? Their favourite film? And how is that shown through their appearance too? (Such as merchandise, tattoos, piercings.)

7. Things I didn't mention consist of:

— do they have any disabilities (mental or physical)? Were they caused by something (accident to be mysterious about)? Or were they born with them?

— do you expect people to relate to them, like them, hate them, fall in love with them, etc? Both real people who may come across your character, and other people in this characters setting?

— hero or villain material? This isn't a fine line, but it doesn't have to be a blurred line. Redemption arc/story? Tragic hero falling to..? Revenge? Lust? Hunger for power?

— how they fit into the scenery or area around them, where they live and how they interact with people who surround them.

But, finally, do what you want. OCs can be tricky, but as soon as you learn that it is — in the end — You who control both them and You, it becomes a whole lot easier.

Blogs I recommend are @develop-your-oc and @creativepromptsforwriting — they both help a lot. <33

My final tip? Enjoy. And, if you don't, stop! Do what you want, forever. :)

#vee answers #god i hope this helped #i spent like an hour on this hahahah

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