#if you could drill drain holes

[maladaptive---daydreamer]

Secrets - Jacob Black

“No, Y/N! Move!” 

You felt as though all the wind in you got knocked out as you flew backwards. There was a deep throbbing sensation before it all went dark.

When you awoke, you could tell from the sounds and the smells that you were in a hospital. You took a while to open your eyes knowing the glare from the fluorescent ward lights would sting. Your throat felt dry and your skin tight. Slowly you pushed yourself up into a seating position to fully take in your surroundings. The ward was relatively empty, just you and another person who chose to close the curtains around their bed. Porters were walking up and down the corridors pushing carts of food and the occasional patient. One of the nurses popped her head through the doorway and nodded with a smile, acknowledging you were awake. You looked to your side to see an empty chair. There was a faint indent of someone's behind etched into the seat letting you know that, until quite recently, you had a visitor. You rifled through the cabinets on either side of your bed hoping to come across your handbag or your phone, hell even your clothes just to make sense of why you were lying in a hospital.

“Ms Y/L/N, good to see you finally awake”

You looked up to see the face of Carlise Cullen.

“I- what happ-” You asked slightly groggily.

“I’m glad you’re awake” He repeated, shining a light into your eye. 

“How long was I out for?”

“You came in 5 days ago, we kept you sedated for 3 before weaning you off.”

“What the fuck happened?”

“You were brought into the hospital unresponsive. We completed scans of your body and found that you had a slight fracture on your t8 vertebrate and increased pressure in your brain. We conducted a ventriculostomy where we drilled a small hole in your skull and inserted a plastic pipe to drain out the excess cerebrospinal fluid and restore adequate blood flow to your brain.”

“How-”

“All they told me was you hit your head, hard.”

“Who’s they?”

“What is the most recent thing you remember, Y/N?”

You closed your eyes and tried to think back to your last moments but all you could remember was waking up and getting ready for your day.

“The last clear thing I remember is getting up to brush my teeth”

“And what time would you say that was?”

“Around half 8 in the morning?”

“Some short-term amnesia is expected, I’m afraid I can’t give you a definitive time frame for when you’ll remember, or if you’ll remember, but you were brought to the hospital at 3.40 pm by Sam Uley, Seth Clearwater and Jacob Black.”

“And where are they?”

“Sam and Seth stayed until you came out of surgery, Jacob stayed the entire five days, he left a short while ago for a shower and a change of clothes.”

“Do you know when I can go home?”

“I need to run some tests just to make sure that your brain function is normal and to check on your spinal fracture and once those are fine, you’ll be free to leave. Would you like me to call your mother?”

You nodded.

“Great, ill be back in a few moments to take you up to radiography.”

Your scans and tests came back normal. Your mum dealt with your discharge paperwork and prescription while you got changed into the clothes she brought for you. Carlise prescribed some pills to keep the swelling on your spine down and to manage the pain and, strict bedrest for the rest of the week to make sure you didn’t damage your spine further. You hobbled your way out of the hospital and to the car. The drive home was silent, you could tell your mum was itching to say something but she held her tongue. She silently helped you up the stairs and into bed.

“Bella came by yesterday to drop off your bag and your phone. I’ve plugged in an extension cord and left it on your bedside table. Try not to move too much. I’ll be downstairs if you need me.” She said, fluffing your pillows and making sure you were comfortable.

You mumbled a small thanks before turning your attention to your phone. It was dead so you plugged it into the charger and let it charge for a while until it switched on. You were greeted with a flurry of text messages from your friends asking about your whereabouts and sending you well wishes for your recovery. 

Ignoring those, you typed out three text messages to the three boys involved in your ’accident’, “What the fuck happened to me?”. Sam and Seth’s replies came almost instantaneously at the exact same time, consisting of the same message, “Ask Jacob.”. Growing increasingly angry as you read over each text a few more times, you called Jacob’s phone. To no one's surprise, you were met with his voicemail. You cut the call and called again, only to be met with his stupid voicemail greeting for a second time. On your third ignored call you decided to leave a message. “I don’t know what happened in the 8 hours before I turned up in the hospital, Sam and Seth have told me to ask you, my mum is acting weird and I don’t know why. I don’t know what you did but I want answers and I want them now, so grow some fucking balls and give me them”. And then you waited. 

For the entirety of your bedrest, you waited for Jacob to call back but he didn't. You waited to hear his heavy footsteps coming up the stairs but you didn't. Bella and Edward had visited a couple of times. Angela came almost every day after school to catch you up on the gossip of Forks high, and to make sure you didn’t fall behind. Paul and Quil dropped by while your mum was at work, somehow managing to nimbly climb in through your window to avoid you moving around. They avoided the topic of Jacob completely, chalking his disappearance down to him being ‘busy’. You knew better than to press on the subject so you dropped it, deciding to wait until you were able to move before you ran up on him. 

“Rise and shine, you’ve got your freedom back today” Your mother sang, pushing open your curtains and pulling off your duvet. 

You rubbed your eyes as you stretched out. “What time is it, Jesus”

“6”

“Mum, I don't have to leave for school for another couple of hours” You groaned in annoyance as you pulled the duvet back up and over your head.

“You haven't washed your hair in days. The sponge baths only did so much. I love you, but you’re smelling a bit ripe”

She had a point, deodorant, bodyspray and dry shampoo could only do so much. You reluctantly got up from your bed and went into the shower. You could still feel a slight dull ache in your back but Carlisle said that was to be expected. Any discomfort you felt immediately dissipated when you felt the hot water hitting your skin. You scrubbed the build-up of grime that had accumulated from your scalp, massaging it lightly. Although it was a quick shower, you were sure you had never felt so clean before in your life. You got out of the steamy bathroom and went back into your room. Your mum had kindly left some toast, a banana and a mug of tea on your bedside table so you tucked into your little breakfast whilst quickly checking your texts. 

Angie: so excited 2 have u back in school

Y/N: just happy 2 b free :’)

Angie: gotta catch u up on gossip

Y/N: LOL, ttyl need 2 get ready xo

You quickly finished your breakfast before applying some moisturiser to your damp skin. There was only just enough time for you to dry your hair before you grabbed your school bag and your car keys and left. 

Your first day back was filled mostly with your classmates asking you what happened and you responding and telling them you had no idea. As each person asked you, the anger you had burning inside you for Jacob only grew stronger. You could have potentially died that day yet you had no answers for what exactly happened. Not knowing a single detail about something that could have derailed your entire life was infuriating.  From your third period, all you could focus on was getting out of school and driving to the reservation. Your friends tried to stop you from leaving so soon, insisting that you needed to celebrate your freedom but you fended them off, promising to celebrate your freedom another time. 

As you drove out of the school car park, you slowly drove past Bella and Edward making sure to initiate eye contact with both of them. They knew what happened, it was obvious, and just like everyone else, they were leaving you in the dark. You parked your car behind Billy’s truck and slammed the door shut. 

“Jacob Black you get your ass out here right now” You shouted, stomping your way to his house. 

Billy was the first person to come out and assess the commotion. “Y/N-”

“Usually, I’d be happy to see you Billy, but right now I want your cunt of a son to come out and stop ignoring me.”

“He’s in the barn, working on his bike” He muttered with a small smile.

You nodded in thanks and angrily walked over to the barn. You took in a deep breath to centre yourself before you practically busted the door down. Jacob’s head snapped up in surprise at the intrusion. “Y/N”

“Embry, Quil, get out.” You ordered. They both looked to Jacob who nodded before getting up off their seats. 

“We’re really glad to see you’re okay Y/N” Embry mumbled as he walked past. 

Once you heard their footsteps retreat, you turned to face Jacob. 

“How fucking dare you?” You screamed, brandishing a spanner that found its way into your hands. 

“Y/N-”

“No! How DARE you treat me like this.”

“Let me-”

“NO, you’re going to listen to me first. I’ve spent the whole week knowing that I have hours of my life that I can’t account for. I don't know where I was, who I was with or how you, Sam and Seth were the ones to get me to the hospital. All anyone has asked me is 'how did it happen?’ and I’m just as knowledgeable as they are. Any time I’ve tried to get answers I get told to ask you. When I try and ask you, you ignore me. I want to know the truth. And I want to know it now”

“I can’t tell you the truth”

“Oh wow, you’re really going to hit me with this bullshit?!”

“I can’t, Sam would kill me”

“Read my lips, Jake, I don’t care. I want the truth.”

He stood silent for a few moments. “Fine, but we need to go somewhere first”

“Why?”

“We just do, but I promise you, you’ll get the truth”

You reluctantly followed Jacob out of the barn and towards the forest. The two of you walked in silence, you trailing a few steps behind him. Jacob had the advantage of being physically fit over you, allowing him to walk over the uneven forest floor and hop over the gnarled tree roots that spread across the muddy paths. It didn't take too long for your calves to burn as you tried to keep up with Jacob, both in speed and orientation. 

“How much longer?” You asked, stopping and leaning on the side of a tree to catch your breath.

“10 minutes” He replied, turning his head over his shoulder.

“Are you serious? My legs are going to fall off”

“The more breaks you take, the longer it'll take”

You mimicked his patronising comment and began walking again, only to misstep and trip. You landed on the mud with a light thump.

“For fucks sake” you muttered, wiping the mud from your hand and slowly getting up.

“You okay?” Jacob asked, rushing to your aid. You could have sworn you saw his breathing speed up as if he was panicked. 

“Just tripped, I can’t keep up with your long ass legs.”

Wordlessly, Jacob swept you off your feet, carrying you bridal style. “Now you don’t need to worry about keeping up with me” He smirked, looking down at you.

“Jake put me down”

“If I put you down we won't get to Sam’s until tomorrow”

“Why are we going to Sam’s?”

“You’ll find out in a bit”

“I’m so sick of being in the dark-”

“I told you, you’ll find out the truth soon”

“That's the - you know what, you won't understand, I give up.”

“I don’t understand what?”

“Nothing”

“No, tell me, make me understand” His steps became harder and faster, you could tell he was starting to get frustrated.

“ Don’t you think I’m scared? I have 0 recollection of what happened that day. There is this huge gap in my timeline and I can't come up with an explanation for it, I can't try to piece memories together and come up with some kind of explanation. On top of that, everyone around me seems to know what happened apart from me.”

Jacob’s lips parted as if to say something but he kept silent. The rest of your walk was filled with a sort of tension. It was an odd tension because despite how irritated you were by Jacob, you felt a sense of peace, some comfort being held by Jacob. If your younger self could’ve seen you at that point, she would've combusted on the spot. It was cliche really, crushing on your best friend, but you couldn’t help it. Jacob was the only one that you felt understood you. He was supportive and always knew how to make you laugh. When the rest of the guys would exclude you from games, he’d always try and find a way to get you back involved. For a while you were starting to think that maybe Jacob liked you too, he was starting to notice the little changes in your appearance and making more plans with just the two of you, alone. That was until Bella came to town. It didn’t take you long to realise where his affection was really directed.

“Well, get ready to get your answers,” He let you down gently and walked into the open front door. You trailed in behind him slightly cautious. You were greeted by Sam and another woman, she had a huge scar on the side of her face. 

“You must be Y/N, I’m Emily, Sam’s fiance,” she said softly.

“I didn't know-”

“I like to keep it on a need to know” Sam stated, crossing his arms.

“I just baked some croissants, why don't you grab one”

You looked over at the dining table to see a plate piled high with glossy freshly baked croissants. Jacob took a seat and you followed suit. He poured himself a glass of orange juice and went to fill yours up. “Before you say anything, there are no bits”. You nodded and took a croissant, tearing a chunk off and tasting it. 

“These are insanely good, Emily” you gushed after swallowing your mouthful. She beamed back at you from the kitchen. 

“So let’s cut to the chase. You want to know what happened last week.” Sam said, leaning against the huge kitchen island.

You nodded. 

“what do you remember about those Quileute stories Billy used to tell us at bonfires”

“They can turn into wolves or something, like werewolves. They knew witches. What does that have to do with this? They were stories we were told as kids”

“What if I told you they weren't stories?”

“Werewolves don't exist”

“You wanna prove her wrong, Jake?”

Jacob sighed as he grabbed you by the arm and took you back outside Sam’s home. He took off his t-shirt and threw it to the side. 

“I didn't want a strip show” You scoffed.

He scoffed and turned around, pulling his shorts down and throwing those with his shirt. He turned again to face you “All I’m asking is that you don’t run. I have more to explain but this part is easier shown.”

You nodded, trying to tear your eyes away from the bulge in his boxers. Jacob jumped off the deck and all of a sudden, you were met with a huge brown wolf.

“You’re fucking shitting me”

“Nope, clear as day. He's a werewolf, and so am I. So are Quil, Paul, Embry and Seth."

The wolf- Jacob, took a few tentative steps closer to the deck, you copied his actions stepping off the deck and meeting him in the middle. He jutted his head forward and you ran your hands over the soft fur on his head. Jacob pushed his head into your hand and you scratched the top of his head and under his jaw simultaneously. He panted happily, moving his head so you could reach the right spots.

“He's like a massive dog” You called out laughing. 

Jacob growled in response and sat up. 

“He told me to tell you to respect him, he's a wolf, not a dog.” Sam chuckled.

“How?-”

“Werewolf things, we can communicate telepathically.” 

You looked from Sam to Jacob, bewildered. 

“He’s gonna change back, you might wanna turn around if you don't wanna see his junk” Sam said, turning around to go back inside.

You stepped back and covered your eyes with your arm. It took a few moments but you heard a quiet zipping sound and dared to take a look at Jacob’s muscular torso. 

“So this only explains a part of what happened. The rest is, well, complicated” Jacob followed sams lead and returned to Emily’s kitchen table. 

“Uncomplicate it for me then.”

“Do you remember the stories of the ‘cold ones?’“

“Kind of?”

“Marble skin, ice cold, no need to eat or sleep, consume blood, more commonly known as-”

“Don’t fucking tell me there are a bunch of bloodsucking vampires running around here too”

“The Cullens”

“THE CULLENS? As in EDWARD Cullen? As in Bella’s boyfriend?”

Sam and Jacob nodded. 

“That’s hilarious, you and Edward are both sworn enemies due to your nature and rival lovers”

“Shut up”

“Back to the topic, on the day in question, you came to the rez to see Jacob. Only Bella and Edward were there too, asking us for help to deal with some newborn leeches. Tensions are already high between the pack and the Cullens, so when they come on our land asking for favours, you can imagine how things go. Things got a bit heated between Paul and Edward, he can barely contain his anger on a good day so he phased. Jacob was stood next to him, so he phased too, to keep him in line”

“Cool story but where do I fit in here?”

“Somehow, during all the testosterone, you got too close. No offence but were all over 6ft tall, so it wasn't that hard for you to get lost in the crowd. When Jake phased, he hit you with his tail and you kind of flew backwards and hit a tree.”

An awkward silence settled over the three of you. 

“Well, I can see why no one wanted to tell me the full story” You joked, cutting through the tension.

“This is something the two of you need to talk out, Em and I will be upstairs if you need us.”

“I think we’ll walk back to my dad”

Sam nodded. “I’ll see the two of you later.”

You gave a small smile and got up and left Sam’s home. 

“Hold up, you’ll end up tripping again”

You refused to laugh at Jacob’s joke, choosing to face ahead rather than look at him. 

“Are you going to ignore me now?” 

You ignored him again. 

“C’mon, Y/N, talk to me” Jacob grabbed a hold of your hand but you shook him off.

“Y/N, I’m being serious. Stop. Look at me.” He grabbed a hold of your forearm, using a bit more force and pulling you towards him. “Please, just look at me”.

You looked up and stared into his eyes. His beautiful chocolatey brown eyes. The eyes you would stare into as a child during staring contests; the eyes you would search for in a crowd of unfamiliar people; the eyes that would meet yours in serious moments that you weren't supposed to laugh in, making you both dissolve into a fit of laughter; the eyes that had been following Bella’s every move for the past couple of years. 

“Hurts doesn’t it? Being ignored?” You said, quietly, not breaking eye contact. 

“You know why I couldn't tell you”

“But you did tell me,”

“After I got Sam’s approval”

“How hard was it to get Sam’s approval while I was in the hospital?” You pulled away from him and continued walking. 

“I didn’t want you to get hurt”

“So what, now that you’ve waited a few days the threat of me knowing the truth has just disappeared?”

“If it was up to me, you wouldn’t have found out until after we dealt with this newborn bullshit. I didn’t count on you showing up at my house, lack of foresight on my part I guess”

“I still don’t understand what this changes for me? Apart from me staying far, far away from the Cullens”

“They’re vegetarians, they only drink animal blood. But that's beside the point.” Jacob stopped and picked up a small log, snapping it into bits like it was a twig. “I’m not good with feelings, I don’t know how I’m supposed to explain this to you”

“Most of us first phased when the Cullens came to town. It's in our DNA, the smell of the bloodsuckers triggers the change. Forks had been free of vampires for the last few decades, so were the first shifters here in a while. The problem is, vampires are like an infestation, when you have one, you have a million more. We’ve been hit with threat after threat, first this woman trying to kill Bella, and now all of this newborn nonsense.

“Bella is just a human and she's stuck in the middle of all of this, this is what knowing does. It’s just not safe”

You felt your heart sink at his mention of Bella. “So you didn’t tell me because you didn’t want me to get in the way?”

“Yes-” 

“Right, I see that I’m just an inconvenience now.” You scoffed. 

“No, I didn't mean that. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to get hurt. I didn’t want you to get involved in all this. Not to mention, your mum forbade me from telling you unless it was necessary”

"My mum knew?"

"She's always known, you could say our families have some history,"

“Well despite what the both of you decided, not telling me got me hurt too”

“I know, and that's why I stayed away because I tried to protect you, I tried to keep you safe and I failed.”

“Wait, do you think that it was your fault?” You stopped walking for a second.

“Well of course it was. I threw you against a tree. You fractured your spine, they had to drill a hole in your head. You could’ve died.” Jacob turned to face you, his chest heaving. “I always thought the bloodsuckers were the monsters and we were the protectors. I nearly killed you, Y/N, so what does that make me?”

“Hey, now it's your turn to look at me” You rushed forward and held your hands to Jacob’s cheeks. “You are not a monster. It was an accident. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time and in the heat of the moment, things went sideways. And yes I could have died. And yes that is a very scary thought. But I’m not dead, hell, it's like nothing even happened. I know I'm angry, but I'm only angry because you kept it from me.  Now that I know you run around with wolves in your spare time, I’ll call ahead before I come over. I’ll even buy some dog treats to keep in my car”

“I’m a wolf, not a dog, huge difference.”

“Tomato, tomato. I guess at the end of the day, you thought you were doing the right thing by keeping it from me”

“Why are you so calm about this?”

“I don’t know myself, it's like I just had to play with wolfy you and I felt better. I guess all that research into the health benefits of pets is right”

“So I’m your pet?”

“Whose a smart boy? You’re a smart boy” you patted Jacob on the head, messing his hair up slightly. 

“That’s it” Jacob placed one muscular arm around your waist and hoisted you over his shoulder. 

“Jacob put me down”

“No,”

“Jacob.”

“You’re slowing me down.”

“JAKE”

“I’m not listening to you”

You accepted defeat and let Jacob carry you back to his home. Once he let you back down, you stumbled slightly, feeling lightheaded from all the blood rushing down from your head. Jacob scrambled to hold you up.

“Are you okay?” He asked, frantically looking for any other signs you were hurt. 

“Headrush, I’m okay” you responded, blinking. 

“I see you’re both back” You both turned to see Billy sitting on the porch. “I assume you’ve told her?”

“Oh yeah, I know about Jake’s secret double life”

“And...”

“Dad-”

“What does he mean by and? What else were you supposed to tell me?”

“It appears I have put my foot in my mouth”

“Just a little bit, thanks dad”

“What-?”

“Let's go into the barn”

You sat down in your designated spot with Jacob flopping down directly next to you. 

“Whoa, designated seats are out the window huh? Must be serious.”

He ignored your comment and tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling. “What do you think about soulmates?”

“Bit of a random question but I think they exist”

“Elaborate”

“I guess I feel like we all have that one person out there for us that allows us to be the best versions of ourselves. Someone you can laugh with one second, cry with the second and argue with the third.”

“Do you think you have a soulmate?”

“I’d hope so” You chuckled slightly. “what do you think?”

“I have one and I know exactly who she is. It's just complicated”

“Let me guess, she's in love with a vampire?” It was now Jacob’s turn to laugh. 

“Actually, it’s not her. We have this thing called imprinting, in my world,”

“I’m sorry, ‘In my world?’ You sound like one of them old white guys telling strangers his war stories"

“It's a wolf thing, you kind of just look at her and you know it. It's like gravity just pushes you towards her. She becomes your entire world. Nothing else matters but her. You become overwhelmed with this desire to be close to her, to touch her, to keep her safe. You would go to the ends of the earth just to keep her happy. At first, I thought it was sappy bullshit but honestly, the entire world could be burning down behind me, but I wouldn’t care as long as she was with me. 

“When I first phased I hoped it would be Bella. I tried my hardest to force it but I looked at her and I felt nothing. And then I saw Her, and I realised how stupid I was to ever even want Bella in the first place. She smiled at me and it reminded me of all the reasons why she was so perfect for me.”

While you were happy that Jacob was no longer pining over Bella, your heart still sunk at the fact that he was unconditionally, head over heels in love with a girl that wasn’t you. The realist in you had tried to convince the hopeless romantic in you that you and Jake were friends and only friends but there was a small part of you that held out hope that one day he would see what was right in front of him. 

“I’m really glad you found her Jake, you deserve it.” You said, plastering a fake smile on your face. 

“Do I? I nearly killed her” 

“You’re on a bit of a hot streak, first me and now this girl” You joked, trying to lift the mood. 

“It technically only counts as one”

“What do you mean, it's obvi-”

“I nearly killed my imprint when I nearly killed you,” He turned his head and looked at you with a small smile. “Suprise”

Upon processing Jacob’s revelation, you sat up straight and replayed his words a few more times in your head, just to be sure you were hearing correctly. Your entire body turned to face him “just to be clear, you imprinted on me?”

“Who's the dumb one now?”

“I’m being serious, it's me?”

“Yes, it's you. It will always be you”

“I’ve waited to hear you say that since we were 11″ You couldn't help but break into a genuine smile.

“You’re so beautiful when you smile like that”

“I’m not beautiful all the time, wow?” you hit him playfully on the arm

“No of course you are, you’re just especially beautiful when you smile, genuinely” He took your hand and pulled you closer to him.

“Hmm good answer” you muttered, resting your head on his chest.

“I was an idiot for not seeing it earlier.”

“How long have you known?”

“A year”

“A YEAR?!”

“I didn’t know how you’d react”

“You’re gonna have to make that year up”

“I intend to,”

[jade-parcels]

_•_•_•_•_•_SEVEN DEADLY SINS_•_•_•_•_•_•_

_PRIDE •WRATH•GLUTTONY•LUST•GREED•ENVY•SLOTH_

(gn!readerXharbingers. title ‘pet’ used,dubious consent(dottore),blood mentions,violence,manipulation,you know the drill)

Pierro feels intense Pride when thinking about his social standing. The first harbinger, the strongest, the most valuable asset to the Tsaritsa. He has everything he could need and more but none of those material goods matter when he has himself. He is typically the voice of reason in harbinger meetings, knocking the other members off of their egotistical thrones. He holds an air of importance, the wise man of the group, but behind closed doors, he admires himself in the mirror, telling you the stories behind each scar littering his toned body. Each battle won, each opponent slaughtered, every fight which led to his current status. ‘You should feel lucky,’ he tells you, gripping your chin- forcing you to meet his gaze ‘Without me, you’d still be rotting in some mud-hole in Mondstadt. I saved you, I made you who you are’. You’ve learned to know that he’s right, he’s taught you to cling to his every word. So you shine his shoes, polish his medals, warm his bed and listen to every heroic tale he tells about himself with wide eyed admiration.

Arlecchino possesses a vengeful spirit. She spits venom at those she dislikes and prays for the demise of those who she disagrees with. Plenty of government officials have peeved her enough that she threatens them behind closed doors, huffing about how they don’t deserve to stand behind those podiums or attend royal balls when they’re such disgusting pigs. She slits the throats of anyone who dares question her authority or collects the eyes of henchmen who dare to look at you without her permission. The eyes in question sit in a jar of water on her desk, floating round and round their glass container. Your stomach flips every time you see them, you feel sick knowing that there are more in there than last time. She interrogates you about any interaction you have with anyone who isn’t her. A chat with the maid, a hushed joke with the butler, a compliment sent to the chef. If she deems an interaction as competition for your affection, those others will feel her Wrath. If you care about the lives of the hired staff or fatui henchmen, you better keep to yourself, don’t look at them, don’t talk to them. Unless you want them to feel the cold metal of your wife’s blade at their neck…

If anyone is the embodiment of Gluttony, it’s Capitano. He doesn’t just fight his enemies, he feasts upon them. He drains their will to live, torments them with the tip of his sword until his prey is begging to be put out of their misery. You see the way he eats his meals, as if he’s been starving for weeks. He viciously cuts into his steak, scarred lips curling up into a wretched smile, those silver teeth glinting in the dark. ‘Why don’t you have some, pet? It’s good~’ he offers you a bite, the gravy spills off of the meat and splats onto the table. He huffs behind the mask, baffled and disappointed when you shake your head. You lean back, refusing to take a bite- you could never stomach it even if you wanted to. With a frustrated growl, he slams his fist down onto the table ‘Whatever, no dinner for you then! Stupid fucking brat- give me that’ he snatches your plate away, dumping its contents onto his own. Blood from the meat splatters up onto his chest and mask, soaking into the white coat he wears. You can’t un-see the way he acted earlier, how hungry he was for battle, how he fought like a bear, covered in blood. The image is burned into your mind… If you think about it much more you’ll be sick…

Dottore’s Lust is insatiable. He lusts for knowledge, for power, for more more more of everything he can get his scarred hands on. He neglects you in favor of spending time in his lab, consulting copies of himself for advice or observing what they do. His little meetings with himself last for hours, sometimes days, and when the fumes become too much or he’s too frustrated with his copies to continue, he seeks you out for stress relief. You hear him before you see him, he’s panting and groaning, kicking the door shut behind him as he approaches the bed where you pretend to sleep. Those gloved hands grope and pinch anywhere they can reach, sharp teeth dig into soft flesh. He doesn’t care that he woke you up to do this, doesn’t care that you’re too tired or too unwell. Right now, he’s lusting for you- nearly drooling at the thought of sinking into you. His mask hides his hungry eyes from view but you know his pupils are blown wide, raking over your exposed body as if it’s the first time he’s seen you this way. When he’s in this state, there isn’t much you can do but submit and hope he’ll be gentle though he never is. Evidence of his lust will always be marked onto you in one way or another

Pantalone has been destined for Greed since childhood. He’s told you his story before, how he grew up in a poor village, watching as his friends gained visions for doing the bare minimum. He succeeded in school, wrote novels worth of economic research, crunched numbers day and night yet no vision came. The glowing orb never appeared in his palm, on his desk or in his pocket. He built himself form the ground up, worked his way through the ranks of the Northland Bank and disposed of his peers who threatened to take a promotion before him. He’s worth billions now, he spends his money on items he doesn’t need to fill that gap in his heart. He possesses so much that his mansion is overly full of trinkets and sparkling decorations. He possesses you too and your neck aches as you’re forced to wear gaudy, heavy jewelry. He keeps his possessions close by, never allowing you to leave his line of sight. You’re all his, everything you own is his. Pantalone has a chokehold on you, your savings, your family’s savings. But it’s never enough. It never will be. He’s greedy, he knows he is, and he accepts it fully, smiling as he fills his pockets with mora and diamonds, holding your hand tightly in his own

Envy flows through Tartaglia’s veins, making his blood thicker and bitter. He paces his room, ranting fiercely ‘Why don’t they see how strong I am? Some girl gets to be Number Four while I’m stuck at Eleven? Put us all in a room together, I’ll come out Number One! You’ll see- they’ll ALL see how terribly the underestimated me!’ He laughs, the awful sound bouncing off the walls of the empty corridor. You awkwardly shift your weight, flinching when he yanks you in by your collar ‘You see how strong I am, right?’ You caress his bloodstained cheek, nodding along, reassuring him that the others don’t know what they’re missing. Ajax is so bitter about his position, he believes he deserves more and he’s jealous of those who rank above him. Now that Signora is dead and Scaramouche is missing, he’s eyeing the Eighth and Sixth spots on the roster, badgering his comrades about dueling regulations. He wants to be the best and won’t let anyone get in his way. You better be his biggest supporter… well… it isn’t like you have a choice

Those who exhibit Sloth are often characterized as sleepy or lazy. An uncommon, but perfect, characterization exists for Scaramouche: apathetic. He shows little emotion, marble eyes stare at you without a hint of concern as you hold your bleeding hand up to him. He rolls his eyes as he wraps your injury and simply discards you once he’s finished the task. You don’t believe he loves you, that he’d care if you died or went away forever to live a life with a better man. He degrades you in his monotone voice, lifeless eyes boring into your very soul as you apologize for speaking out of line. You observe him work, listen to him talk to subordinates. He sounds so bored… Part of you wants to test the waters, to throw a fit so dramatic, so catastrophic that he has to respond. But no matter what you do, no matter your injuries, tears, laughter, proclamations of love… you never get a proper response. A dull ‘love you too’ or ‘get out of my face’ is uttered, emotionless and robotic. Giving up would be the easy way out but maybe, just maybe, you can push things further just out of morbid curiosity. Is there anything you can do to get him to see you? To react to you?

[pedrito-friskito]

strawberry wine - joel miller x ofc!liv stone/fem!reader

after - part twenty-three

series masterlist | main masterlist | read on ao3

shit doesn't go as planned on your way out of the QZ.

a/n: the bridge between episode 1 and 2. part twenty-four will be up this week! thank you to all of those who commented on the last two parts, I'll be reblogging/replying to those plus any comments here in the next two days, and my askbox is always open 🤍 thanks for sticking with me bbys!!! I love you all!

word count: 7.3k

warnings: canon-typical violence, you know the drill. no filth here.

✨@friskito-library for updates on new parts/works✨

“Observe mandatory curfew to fight infection and insurrection.”

God, if you had a dollar for every time you’d heard that fucking sentence. Or a ration card. You’d be set for life. You and Joel could die well-fed. Tess, too.

The rain has let up some, but still, you pull your hood up, instruct Ellie to do the same. The bat is a soft press between your shoulders, hidden by your bag, but you feel acutely aware of the weapon. You feel acutely aware of everything. Not like this is your first rodeo — this is an old habit for you, at this point — but something feels different. It is different.

Before you even step foot out of the lobby, you grab Ellie, turning her to face you. She stares up at you with those dark eyes, so full of fear you almost feel bad. “I’m gonna keep this simple,” you say to her, removing your hand from her shoulder. “You stay in between me and Joel, not behind. Between. You follow close, you keep your mouth shut, and if shit goes south, you take the easiest path, follow whichever one of us gets away, and you don’t look back. Clear?”

She just stares at you for a moment, her bottom lip almost quivering. “What if none of you get away?”

“We will. Are we clear?” When she doesn’t reply, you prompt her further. “Ellie,” you say, your voice teetering on stern. “Say it.”

The kid swallows hard, nods. “Clear.”

“Good.” You tear your eyes from her innocent face, finding Joel’s dark gaze watching you. “Ready?”

He just nods.

It’s easy enough, getting from the apartment building to the opening at Lancaster. Tess scouts a few feet ahead, signals you to follow when it’s clear, and you take one of your old routes through the empty warehouses to get where you need to be.

Ellie keeps close to you as you move through the city, just as you’d asked. At one point, your boot slips on the curb, your ankle twisting sideways, and before you can so much as flinch, she grabs your hand, using her weight to push you back onto the sidewalk. You mouth thanks and she nods, but doesn’t let go of your hand.

Finally, the storm drain at Lancaster is in view, and Tess jogs ahead, waiting for the coast to clear before she waves you forward. She and Joel lift the drain, Tess slides down first, then Ellie, then you, then Joel. He turns once he’s in, grabs the drain cover and slides it back into place with some help from you.

It’s dark inside, the walls slimy and wet and it smells fucking awful. Tess doesn’t waste any time, heading towards the other end, and once you’re almost there, Joel pushes to the front, taking the few steps up to the asphalt barrier. With a grunt, he pushes his shoulder up and into it, pauses when you hear the sound of a helicopter overhead. Once it passes, he continues to slide the asphalt piece across, another quiet grunt falling out of him. 

Joel hauls himself up and out, kneeling in the dirt, and holds his hand towards you. You take it, holding your breath as he yanks you up, jutting his chin towards your foot, the ankle that had twisted. “You okay?” he whispers.

You just nod, kneeling beside him as Ellie clambers out of the hole. Her hands press into the dirt and you grab her by the handle of her backpack, helping her out, then offering your hand to Tess. As soon as you’re all out, crouched in the dirt, you and Joel grab hold of the asphalt, sliding the piece back into place.

Ellie straightens, awe in her expression as she takes in your new surroundings. “Holy shit, I’m actually outside!”

“Oh, for the love of—” You grit the words out, grabbing the sleeve of her jacket and yanking her back down hard.

“Oh, shit,” she half-whispers, ducking down behind the abandoned bus you’ve tucked yourself behind. The unimpressed expression on Joel’s face would make you laugh in any other circumstance. “Sorry.”

“Okay,” you whisper, ignoring her apology. “We’re gonna take the left edge around the buffer zone, you know what that is?” you ask, and she nods, her lips pressed together. “You stay close, like you have been, and you follow my lead. You got it?”

“Yeah,” she agrees, nodding more. “Of course. I got it.”

“Let’s go,” Tess hisses, and you wave her on, shooting Joel a glare as he shakes his head, nudging Ellie to follow Tess beneath the bus. He waits for you to slide beneath before following, and when you glance back, you see the FEDRA spotlights sweep across the space you’d just been occupying.

Tess takes the lead again, and Ellie pauses when you come out the other side of the bus, waiting for you to step ahead, taking her place between you and Joel. She looks at you with big eyes as you walk past her, almost like she’s waiting for your approval, and you offer it in the form of a slight nod, mouthing good call.

The rumble of a truck makes your every sense heighten, and Ellie grabs your hand. You grip it tight, pulling her to the side, ducking you both behind a car as the truck drives past. Tess looks at you wordlessly over the top of Ellie’s head, and you turn your neck to see Joel crouched behind an overturned car. You all pause, waiting for more noise, but only the thunder comes.

Your steps are a bit faster now, all of you pushed against the fractured concrete that shields you from the helicopters above. Tess keeps point, and you keep your grip on Ellie’s hand. A second truck rumbles past, and you all dive for cover. You don’t miss the hitch in the kid’s breath as she tries to catch it, and you squeeze her fingers.

“It’ll be okay, kid,” you tell her. “Just stay close. You’re doing great.”

Even without looking, you can feel Joel’s eyes shooting daggers into your back.

Another corner turned, and the gap in the fence comes into view. It’s almost comical, with the warning signs on either side of it, the chain link spread wide enough for you all to fit through. Ellie’s still holding your hand, and you make for the fence, squinting up as the rain starts to come harder, soaking your hair, making it stick to the back of your neck. Joel moves up beside you, his hand finding your side as you step forward and then—

“Hey!”

Fuck.

“Hey, don’t, don’t…don’t move!”

You all freeze as you see Sergeant Lee Evans standing against the concrete wall, re-zipping his pants, flashlight waving as he reaches for his gun. McCoy’s guy, the one who’d taken over his posts, the one you’ve been making deals with for a long time. The one who was meant to get you the truck to get to Wyoming, before you struck the deal with Marlene.

“Don’t move!”

Lightning flashes and thunder rumbles, illuminating the space you’re all standing in. Lee lifts his gun, points it at Joel, then you, then Ellie. Then he pauses, the gun swinging back to you, and lifts the visor on his helmet.

“You gotta be shittin’ me.”

“Okay, Lee, wait,” you start, lifting your hands, putting yourself slightly in front of Ellie, “let’s just talk this out, yeah?”

Joel takes a half-step, doing the same, his tone sliding into something persuasive. “Hold on—”

“Get on your fuckin’ knees!” Lee shouts, pointing at Joel, the gun lowering slightly. “Get on your fuckin’ knees!”

“Now, hold on—” Joel repeats, but Lee ignores him.

“What did I fuckin’ tell you, man? I said stay the fuck home. Now, get on your knees!”

“Lee—”

“Knees!”

Tess smacks your arm. “Just get on your knees,” she says, sinking to her own. “Just get on your knees.” On the ground, she turns back to Lee, trying to placate him. Meanwhile, you sink down beside her, tugging Ellie down, while Joel takes the empty space between Ellie and Tess. “You let us do this run,” Tess continues, her voice carrying through the space, “and we’ll split the cards with you.”

“Oh, will you?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m so blessed,” Lee says sarcastically. “Hands on your head, eyes forward.”

You shoot a glance over your shoulder, and see the bio-scanner in his hand. Your stomach drops into your toes. Fuck. There’ve been a few run-ins, over the years, sure, but you’ve always managed to talk your way — or shoot your way — out of them.

“Hands on your head!” Lee spits.

Not talking your way out of this one.

You do as the soldier says, nudging Ellie to do the same. Joel shoots you a glance, meeting your eyes over the kid’s head, and you shake your head just slightly. What the fuck are you gonna do, what are you gonna—

“Really, man?” Tess protests as the machine buzzes at her neck.

“Yep,” Lee grits, unimpressed. “We’re doing this by the book.”

“Jesus Christ,” Tess mutters, glancing at you before looking back at Lee. “What about three-quarters?”

The screen on the bio-scanner goes green, clearing Tess, and you swallow around the lump that’s formed in your throat. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck

“Unauthorized exit,” Lee spits, shooting you a glare. “They’ll hang you for that.”

“Fine!” Joel shouts as Lee moves along the line of you, shoving the scanner against Joel’s neck. “Everything off of this run.”

“And half off on all the pills,” you shout, trying to sweeten the deal.

Lee laughs at you. “Half off? All off. Risk my job for half off. Outta your fuckin’ minds.”

Beside you, Ellie’s breathing gets heavy. Something in you wants to reach for her, but you resist, lacing your hands at the back of your head. Lee steps towards her, and something tightens in your chest, making you—

Ellie screams as the scanner beeps at her neck, whirling around towards Lee. You didn’t notice the switchblade open in her hand, and it sinks into Lee’s leg.

“Ellie!” you shriek. Lee shoves her forward and you go after her instantly, putting yourself in front of her as Lee yanks the knife out. It clatters to the asphalt, and Tess slinks to the side, Joel standing in front of you and Ellie as Lee lifts his gun.

“Fucking bitch!” he shouts. “Get out of the fucking way!”

“Woah!” Joel shouts, lifting his hands again. “Woah!” He glances over his shoulder at you, standing in front of Ellie, your arm held out protectively. “We can fix this!”

The barrel of the gun shifts from Joel to you, the flashlight taped to it blinding you. You feel Ellie’s fingers curl in the fabric of your sleeve. “Move,” Lee spits, “or I kill your wife, and then the girl.”

For a moment, everything is eerily silent. Joel is completely still. Behind you, you can hear the hitch in Ellie’s breath, and this beast in your chest, this protective thing roars. If Lee pulls that trigger, you’ll—

“Move.”

Lee takes a step towards you, and Joel lunges forward with a yell. They both go crashing to the ground, the gun skittering to the side, but Joel has the upper hand in a moment. Over and over, his fist connects with Lee’s face, the flashes of lightning illuminating the blood on his skin, on Joel’s knuckles. Over and over and over and over.

“Joel,” you call, but it’s no use, he doesn’t so much as flinch. Ellie tries to step around you, and you try to stop her, try to shield her from the bloody scene before you, but she moves around you quickly, her dark eyes fixated on Joel’s cocked fist. “Joel!”

Finally, he stops, breathing heavily as he lifts his red-stained fist. His knuckles are probably split, maybe even broken, and your own heart is rioting in your chest. He straightens slightly, turning back to the three of you, and for a moment, he and Ellie just stare at each other. Lee lies unmoving on the ground.

Then Joel’s eyes slide to you. “Liv, I…” He trails off, but you just shake your head.

You step towards him, grip his arm and haul him sideways off of Lee’s too-still body. Bile crawls up the back of your throat. Not the first time, you know it won’t be the last. “We need to go.”

Behind you, Tess gasps. You turn to see her with Lee’s bio-scanner in her hand. The screen is red.

He’d scanned Ellie last.

“No!” the girl cries, panic making her voice climb. “No! No, I’m not sick!”

“Liv!” Tess shouts, holding the scanner towards you, the red screen too bright as it blinks at you. “Liv!”

“I am not sick,” Ellie says again, and your stomach ties itself into a knot. “I’m not sick! Look, look!” She tugs up her sleeve, offers her arm to Tess, and Joel pulls you back a step, trying to put himself in front of you. Like that matters. “This is three weeks old,” Ellie continues, her tone still dripping with panic. “Nobody lasts more than a day. Does this look a day old to you?!” Her head lifts, those dark eyes whipping in your direction. “I couldn’t tell you, you would’ve killed me!”

“We should fucking kill you!” Tess spits, and Joel puts his hand on your arm, but you shrug it off. Faintly, you can hear FEDRA sirens growing closer.

“They’re gonna catch us if we don’t run,” Ellie says, and her eyes are trained on you. Joel reaches out again, but you smack his hand away this time, crouching and grabbing Lee’s gun, shoving it against Joel’s chest. He catches it with his good hand, and you grab at his injured one, inspecting his split and bloody knuckles. He hisses when you spread his fingers, pulls his hand away.

As you drop his hand, something catches your eye. Ellie’s knife, smeared with blood, laying in the dirt. You crouch to grab it, switching the blade shut and jamming the thing into your pocket.

“We need to go,” you say, and stride back to where Ellie’s standing. You all but yank her away from Tess, pushing the young girl toward the fence. “Tess, let’s go.”

You hold the fence open as Ellie scrambles through, keep it open for Tess as well. Joel is still standing beside Lee, staring down at the soldier.

“Joel!” you shout, and his head snaps up, dark eyes meeting yours. “We need to go.”

The sirens are getting closer, but you wait for him. He offers you his good hand as he gets closer, the gun now looped over his shoulder, and you take it, lacing your fingers together and heading through the fence. Ellie looks at you with big eyes as you clamber through, Tess holding the chain link open for you both. Gripping Joel’s hand tightly, you turn her around, push her forward as you all disappear into the night, the sounds of FEDRA’s patrols getting closer and closer to the scene you’ve left behind.

+

The rain doesn’t let up. It gets worse as you move through the city, puddles beneath your every step. Your socks are soaked inside your boots, your hair sticking to your scalp. Joel’s grip on your hand is tight, his knuckles pressed to yours.

You get a few feet from the fence before Ellie turns to you, panic embedded in her face, an apology on her lips. “Liv, please, I’m sorry, okay? I couldn’t tell you, Marlene said not to—”

“Shut up,” you hiss at her, forcing yourself to ignore the way she flinches at your tone. She stops in her tracks, and you pull away from Joel enough to grab her by the front of her jacket, spinning her around. “We’re not safe out here, whether or not you’re sick. Follow Tess, and keep your mouth shut.”

She does as you say.

You fall back into step with Joel, who’s now brandishing Lee’s gun, his good hand on the trigger. Thunder rumbles, and you reach for the bat, gripping the handle tightly. Being outside of the QZ is one thing, this close to the walls, but unarmed is another. Ahead of you, Tess picks her way through the rubble, heading for the closest building. It used to be a hair salon; you remember getting your hair done there, before. The memory feels strange to recall, fuzzy at the edges and almost more like a dream.

Joel nudges you with his shoulder, his voice low. “How are we gonna play this?”

Pulled out of your head, you turn toward him, your brows pulling down. “What?”

“Tess doesn’t know about you,” he whispers, his eyes searching yours. “And if this kid is—”

“Tess doesn’t know what about me?” you ask him, and you watch the realization settle on his face. There’s a loud creak, and you see Tess has pried the salon door open, waving you all in. “Can we just make it through the night, first? One thing at a goddamned time.”

You go to take a step away, but Joel catches your hand, wincing as his bruised hand closes around yours. “Liv, I…” He clears his throat, staring down at his boots. “I’m sorry, for what happened back there. He pointed that gun at you and the kid and I just…” After a beat, his eyes lift to yours. They’re so haunted, so full of emotion that your breath catches. “He pointed that gun at you, and I was right back to that night. In Austin, when Sarah…”

His voice breaks on her name. Something in your chest cracks. You honestly can’t remember the last time he said it out loud.

“Stop,” you say, moving close to him. You take his scruffy jaw in your hand, keep his eyes on yours. “You did what you had to. We had to get out of there. There was no other option. I know that, and you know that. Lee was a fucking asshole, anyway.” He huffs something like a laugh, and you press a soft kiss to his mouth. “We’re safe, okay? C’mon. Let’s go inside. I need to look at that hand.”

Stepping into the salon feels surreal, your brain wired to expect fluorescent lights and the secretary who truly couldn’t have given less of a fuck asking what time your appointment was at. You’ve walked past this place a million times on runs since the walls went up, but you’ve never once stepped back inside.

Ellie’s standing in the middle of the space, staring up at the ceiling. Nature has truly taken over, grass and moss erupting through the cracked tiles, dirt covering the rest of the floor. A lone chair stands upright off to the side, every mirror shattered to pieces. Ivy climbs along one wall, and as you walk inside, Tess shuts the door, muttering at Joel to help her move a big cabinet in front of the door.

“What the fuck was Marlene doing with an infected kid?” Tess hisses as the three of you stand near the door, stealing glances at the kid in the middle of the salon. “We oughta put a damn bullet in her head.”

“Then why didn’t Marlene do it?” you counter, and Tess’s shoulder sag. “Clearly she’s important. She said that bite is what, two weeks old? What—”

“Three weeks,” Ellie calls out conversationally, a rumble of thunder punctuating her words. You give her the most withering look you can manage.

You look back at Tess. “We’re tired. We’re scared. That wasn’t what any of us had anticipated, and the last thing we need to do is make an impulsive decision.” Joel nods slightly, his eyes glued to your face. “We sleep it off, and we talk it out in the morning.”

“I’ll take first watch,” Tess says, reaching out and taking Lee’s gun from Joel. “Tell her to pick a corner.” She looks at you. “I’ll wake you in a few hours.”

You nod, inclining your head towards an empty corner. Joel heads for it, and you walk towards Ellie.

Your steps are slow, the bat still held in your hand. She turns her head to look at you as you approach, and you look up a the ceiling, seeing the large hole giving way to the floor above, the cracked beams and what looks like a tree growing out of the second storey. Further up, you can see flashes of lightning, the rumble of thunder following close behind.

“So, is this the part where you kill me?” she asks, and you know she’s trying to be the tough guy, but her voice gives her away, that waver of panic still evident. “I really am sorry.”

“It’s late,” you say, shaking your head. “No one’s killing you. You should get some sleep, all right? We’re all rattled; we’ll figure this out in the morning.” When she doesn’t say anything, you say, “Okay?”

“Okay.”

“You got a blanket or anything in that bag?”

She shakes her head. “I’ll be okay.”

“Okay.”

Without another word, you turn on your heel, heading for the corner Joel is now occupying. He’s sat on the ground, his back propped against the wall, legs stretched ahead of him. You drop your bag next to his, tapping your boot against his. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he replies, eyes shooting open. His bad hand lifts to rub over his face and he winces before he can complete the movement. “Fuck.”

“Let me see it,” you say, crouching in front of your bag, pulling out what little first aid supplies you have left. A single alcohol wipe, a mostly-clean rag you tore into strips for bandages. “You think it’s broken?”

“Maybe a hairline,” he grunts, sliding over as you move to sit beside him, holding your hand out for his. You tear the wipe open with your teeth, spit the wrapper to the side. “It’ll heal fast.”

“I’ve heard that one before,” you mutter, shaking your head as you lift his hand for closer inspection, swiping at the blood. He doesn’t flinch, but lets out a little groan, his other hand wrapping around your leg.

You clean as much of the blood away as you can. Two of his knuckles are split, but you’ve definitely seen worse on him. And if there’s anything you’ve learned about Joel over the years, it’s that he can take the pain.

You both can.

You finish wrapping his hand, tying the makeshift bandage off in the middle of his palm. It’s not ideal, but it’ll do. The ground is hard beneath you as you settle in, Joel bunching up his jacket as a pillow for you both to share, him lying with his back to the wall, good ear up. You fit yourself against his front, draping your coat over the both of you, tugging his arm around your waist beneath it. Whatever comfort you can get, you take. You revel in it.

Every time you try to close your eyes, something pops up to haunt you, chasing sleep away before you can grab it. 

Memories of the explosions all those years ago, of hiding in the bookstore and waiting to die.

The way you’d held out hope that Joel was still alive, that he’d make good on his promise and find you, across the country, no matter how much time had passed. 

The fear that had consumed you when you were bit, the hope Joel had offered when he told you about Anna, what had happened to her, what turned out to be the same for you.

The panic you felt when Nick took Deanna and the kids away, blackmailing you into silence. 

The frustration when Tommy stopped answering the goddamned radio, sending Joel into a spiral. 

The obvious hurt in Tess’s face after she and Robin had talked. 

That sinking feeling that’s been chasing you around with every day that’s passed where you haven’t heard from Bill and Frank, not a song on the radio or a crackling message to let you know they’re okay.

The feral violence Joel had rained down on Lee, to keep you safe. To keep Ellie safe.

The sheer fucking terror in Ellie’s face when the scanner turned red.

Sleep seems to come to Joel easily, his breathing evening out against your neck, his forehead tipped against the back of your head. His arm tightens around you, and you try to replace the haunted memories with good ones, happy ones. Led Zeppelin on the radio and walking down the aisle, all the stars in the sky and the bed of Joel’s truck, the deer at the lake and your honeymoon at the cabin.

It feels like sleep has just pulled you under when Tess is waking you for the next watch. “Liv,” she calls, her hand curled around your shoulder. “Liv.”

Your eyes blink open, and it takes you a minute to realize that there’s music playing.

I’m taking a ride with my best friend.

+

Tess kicks at Joel’s boot and he jolts out of dreamless sleep. You’re not where you were, pressed against him, and he bolts upright, panic twisting his stomach when he sees you a few feet from him, hunched over something. He rubs his hand across his face and his hand aches.

“What…?”

Never want to put my feet back down on the ground.

“I can’t check the fucking book, Tess, can I?” you spit, shoving your hand through your hair. It’s the radio, Joel realizes, that you’re bent over, the music filling the quiet space between you. He glances to the corner where Ellie had sprawled; she’s still asleep, curled on her side, facing away from all of you. “I swear to god, it was 1985.”

“Sure, when you were what, seven?” Tess hisses, straightening, putting her hands on her hips. The frustration is clear on her face. “How do we know it wasn’t the nineties? Depeche Mode was still around when the world fucking imploded, it could have been ‘92, ‘93?”

“Nineties doesn’t mean anything on the code, Tess,” you tell her, your tone completely flat until you say her name, and your voice snaps in two. “Something is wrong.” You go quiet for a moment, heaving a breath, and then launch the radio across the room. It hits the wall with a loud crack, splintering into pieces, and from the corner of his eye, Joel sees Ellie jump. “I was right. We should have left days ago, we shouldn’t have waited for this to fucking happen!”

You get to your feet, storming across the salon to where he’d propped the cabinet against the door. The metal rings as your fist connects, and Tess shoots him a look. “Liv,” he calls, getting to his feet, jogging toward you. He catches your wrist before you can swing again. “Baby, stop it. Don’t—” You try to yank your hand away from him, but he tightens his grip. “Hey.”

“They could be dead,” you murmur, the words halfway between speaking and sobbing. His heart aches at the sound. “They could…” You trail off, shaking your head, tears shining on your cheeks in the streaks of moonlight coming through the cracks in the windows and doors.

“C’mere,” Joel whispers, using your wrist as leverage, pulling you against him. You go willingly, collapsing into his chest. You bury your face in his neck, and he rubs his hand up and down your spine. “There’s nothin’ we can do right now, baby. It’s the middle of the night, you’re exhausted, we all are. The moment the sun comes up, we get the kid to the State House, we get the truck, and we haul ass to Lincoln, you understand me? Computer probably stopped working, and Bill couldn’t reset the radio.” He presses his lips to your temple, his next words muffled against your skin. “It’s gonna be fine. Everythin’ is gonna be fine.”

With a soft noise something like a whimper, you nod your head, your forehead brushing his chin as you do.

“Go back and lie down,” he tells you, reluctantly detaching you from his chest. “I’ll take the next watch.”

“But—”

“Go, Liv,” he says, a little more tersely. “I’ll wake you in a couple hours.”

You’re halfway across the room when Ellie pipes up. “1987.”

You stop dead in your tracks. Joel’s watching you go, Tess also watching from her spot against the wall. “What did you say?”

“The song. It’s from 1987,” the kid repeats, rubbing at her eyes. “I had the cassette tape.”

You say nothing in response, and for a moment, Joel feels like all the air has been sucked out of the room. Your head is turned, he can just see your profile, streaks of moonlight in your hair. He’s never seen that expression on your face, as you stare at Ellie. He doesn’t have a name for it.

“Go back to sleep,” you say finally, and Joel inhales sharply. 

He waits until you’ve settled back in the space where you’d both been laying, your coat tugged over you like a blanket. Tess hands him the rifle, finding her own space to sprawl out, and Ellie watches before turning over herself, the room plunging back into silence.

As quietly as he can, Joel creeps across to where the radio had landed. It’s shattered, the plastic cracked, the metal antenna a few feet away from the rest of it. Sighing, Joel slides his boot across the ground, pushing the pieces closer to the wall.

+

Morning comes quick. The moment Tess and Joel wake, you’re anxious to get moving, but there’s still a conversation to be had. You barely slept, your mind racing too quickly for you to feel rested, and you know Joel stayed on watch longer than he should have. You can see it in the bags under his eyes, the groan he lets out as he peels himself up off the floor.

Joel found two more chairs, in the night, and Tess sinks into one of them while you take the other, facing Ellie’s still sleeping figure. Joel stands behind you, Lee’s rifle in his hand. “Keep it pointed at her,” Tess says, and when his eyes shift to you, you just nod.

The lying comes almost too easily, pretending you’re not the same as the girl still asleep on the floor. Three weeks post-bite versus fourteen years. You wonder, if Tess knew the truth, if she’d pull a gun on you. You wonder how deep your betrayal would cut her.

You force the thought from your mind as the building creaks above you. The rain is gone, replaced with sunlight that streams through the hole in the ceiling, lighting up the middle of the salon, the grass and moss bright green in the sun.

A loud creak echoes through the building, and Ellie rouses, rolling onto her stomach and pushing herself up off the ground. You all watch silently as she wakes, patting at her pockets. She curses under her breath, and you see fresh panic on her face as she grabs her bag and wrenches it open, digging through it.

You pull the switchblade from your pocket. “Looking for this?”

She grimaces. “Morning. Can I have that back?” She gets to her feet, and Joel lifts the rifle. Guilt tugs at your stomach at the expression on her face. “Do I look like I’m infected?” 

You open your mouth to reply, but Joel beats you to it. “Show us your arm.”

With a loud sigh, Ellie tugs up her sleeve. Her bite looks similar to yours, in the middle of her forearm. The same spindly lines stretch outward from the bite that’s long healed over. Yours is just the same has been for years.

“Yeah, it’s not getting any worse, is it?” she says flatly.

Tess shoots you a look, and you inhale deeply, one brow lifting, the words silently communicated. She’s got a point.

“If we’re out in the open city, why aren’t we getting swarmed?” Ellie asks.

“Don’t worry about that,” Joel shoots back, and the kid almost rolls her eyes.

“Well, I’m gonna.”

Joel leans forward like he’s gonna say something more, but you put your hand out, your knuckles hitting his chest. “What was Marlene doing with an infected kid?” you ask, tilting your head to the side.

“I’m not infected,” she says quickly, and the three of you just stare back. Your brow lifts again, and she keeps going. “She found me after I was bitten.”

“And she didn’t just shoot you, right then and there?”

“Clearly not.” The kid’s gaze drops, tugging at a blade of grass at her feet. “She locked me up and had her guys test me every day to see if I was getting sick.”

“Test you how?” Tess asks, leaning closer to you.

“I have to pee,” Ellie quips, and Tess goes rigid beside you.

“Test you how?” you repeat.

“They’d make me count to ten and hold out my hand and keep it steady, but you know, I think what really impressed them was the fact that I didn’t turn into a fucking monster.” You have to stifle your laugh as the kid gets to her feet. “Now can I please?”

Joel rises as Ellie does, lifting the gun slightly. Her eyes go wide again, full of fear, and you grab the back of Joel’s jacket. “Fine,” you jut your chin toward the back of the salon. “Through that door. Pick a corner.”

“Here,” Tess calls as she walks away, grabbing a magazine at her feet and flinging it towards Ellie, who catches it easily. “Tear out a few pages.”

She turns on her heel, heading for the door you’d pointed to. “There’s not gonna be anything bad in here?” she asks.

“Just you,” Joel retorts, and you smack his chest.

“Oh, funny.”

You sigh collectively as she disappears through the door. Joel sinks into the chair you’d been sitting in, and you hold out your hand for his. “Let me see,” you say, and he lets the rifle sit in his lap, putting his bandaged palm in yours. He winces as you tug at the bandage, and you purse your lips; clearly it’s more tender than it’d been last night. “Should have brought something for the pain.”

“Didn’t think I’d be in pain,” Joel says, lifting his eyes to yours. He still has that haunted look in them, the one you’d seen when he’d told you what last night had done to him, that he’d felt like he was back there with Sarah. 

And then the way he’d held you, after the radio had gone off. This is what your lives have become, both of you cracked at the edges, the other just trying their best to keep you from shattering completely.

Over and over and over again.

You can feel Tess’s eyes on you, and when you’ve retied Joel’s bandage, your eyes slide to hers. “What?”

“What?” she repeats, shock on her face. “She made it through the fucking night, and that’s all you have to say?”

“Three weeks, Tess,” you say, flinging your hand in the direction Ellie had disappeared. “We might not like Marlene, but she’s not a fucking idiot. If the kid was going to turn, it would have happened already, and if it had, she’d be dead, and we’d already be in fucking Wyoming.”

“It could still happen,” Joel pipes in, and your gaze slides to his. His fingers twitch in your grip. This is for show. You hope. “We’re still close to the wall; we sneak her back in, we find another way to get the battery, then we go.”

“I won’t go back to the QZ,” Tess says, shaking her head. “Not now. I’m done with Boston. I can’t…” She keeps shaking her head. “I won’t. You two take her back, if that’s what you want, but I won’t—”

“What did Robin say to you?” you ask, leaning forward so you can catch her eyes. But she says nothing, and you heave a sigh. “We don’t have time. Besides, we take her back to the QZ, how long until someone notices her arm? They scan her, they kill her, and it’s just another fucking tally in FEDRA’s book.”

“We take her to the Fireflies, and what the fuck are they gonna do with her?” Tess counters.

“We take her to the Fireflies, and at least we get what we want.”

She goes silent again.

Ellie’s footsteps echo as she comes back into the main room, and Joel leans back in his chair, both hands around the rifle again. Ellie tosses the magazine back at Tess, and it skids across the floor, hitting her boots.

“We should eat something,” you say, reaching for your bag. You dig out some of the dried beef you’d collected yesterday, hand a piece to Joel as Tess takes her own out. “Ellie, are you hungry? You can share some of ours.”

“I’m good,” she replies, returning to her spot in the moss. “Marlene sent me with my own.”

Joel’s hand shakes as he tries to snap the beef into a smaller piece, and you take it from him, breaking it yourself and handing him half. His eyes flash to yours, and you squeeze his shoulder. You’re all silent for a moment, eating quietly, until something in the air makes your nose prickle.

“Is that…chicken?”

“Yeah,” Ellie says, swallowing a mouthful. “Marlene said they get it from smugglers. I guess not you guys.”

Slowly, you tilt your head to the side, tossing your piece of beef back onto the paper sitting atop your bag. “Why are you so important to Marlene, huh? That woman is stingy with her resources, but she’s pulled out all the stops for you.” You get to your feet, feeling Joel swipe at the back of your jacket as you step toward the kid. “And don’t lie to me, or we’ll take you back.”

“You take me back, and you don’t get what you want,” the kid says, a sly grin on her face.

You scoff. “Oh, you heard that? Then you must have heard the other part, too. We take you back to the QZ, and it’s only a matter of time before FEDRA gets their hands on you. And trust me, kid, they’re a hell of a lot meaner than we are.” You glance over your shoulder at Joel, his wrapped hand. “And that’s saying something. You wouldn’t last a day.”

Her throat bobs, and Joel calls your name, a warning.

You sink into a crouch in front of her, arms braced on your knees. “I’m gonna talk to you like you’re an adult, okay? The three of us? We aren’t good people, Ellie. We’re doing this for us, like you said, to get what we want. Apparently, you’re worth something, but we don’t know what you’re worth, other than the fact that you got bit three weeks ago, and like you said, you’re not a fucking monster. So answer my question: why are you so important to Marlene?”

She looks at you for a long moment before her eyes drop shut, and she covers her face with her hand. “She told me not to tell anyone,” she mumbles out, “and now I’m telling the first people that…”

You just stare at her, waiting.

Finally, with a sigh, she continues. “There’s a Firefly base camp somewhere out west, with doctors. They’re working on a cure.”

You hear the screech of the chair across the ground, and Joel gets to his feet. “Mhm, we’ve heard this before.”

Ellie shoots a glare in his direction. “And whatever happened to me is the—”

“—key to finding the vaccine,” Joel finishes, and you can hear the anger creeping up into his voice. “That’s what this is? We’ve heard this a million times. Vaccines, miracle cures, none of it works. Ever.”

“Fuck you, man,” Ellie spits, jumping to her feet. “I didn’t ask for this!”

“Yeah, you and me both!” he shouts back. “Running fuckin’ errands for Fireflies, some kind of goddamn joke.”

You know why he’s angry. It’s not the first time you’ve heard it, and if you’d stayed in Boston any longer, you know it wouldn’t have been the last. And every single time, Joel had bristled like a cornered animal. You saw the same look on his face that you had when he’d fought with Tommy, when his brother had mentioned giving you over to the Fireflies when he found out what you are. 

About five years back, some doctor in New York claimed to have created a cure using the blood of the infected. It even got to the point where people volunteered to be a part of the trial, they had so much faith in the dumb fuck. The hospital he was working out of was overrun within two days. A few months later, another doctor in another QZ had some other hair-brained scheme, on and on it went.

Hell, maybe they’re spouting the same shit in Wyoming. Only time will tell.

“All the more reason not to take her back,” you say, turning to face Joel. “We finish this. We get what we came for, and we get the fuck out of this state.” You reach out for his good hand, rub your thumb across his knuckles. “Okay?”

“Okay,” he grunts, pulling away from you. 

You gesture for Ellie to get her things, and as Joel picks up the rifle, her eyes cut to you. “Can I have a gun?”

“Pardon?” you sputter.

Joel cuts his hand through the air. “Absolutely not.”

Tess looks at you like she can’t believe what she’s hearing. “Fuck no”

“Okay, Jesus, fine,” Ellie nearly whines, “I’ll have to throw a fucking sandwich at them.”

That actually makes you laugh, and Tess shoots you a look. “What? It’s a good visual.”

Huffing, Joel moves towards the door, sliding the cabinet out of the way of the door. As it swings open, more sunlight pours in, the sounds of birds chirping making it almost inviting to step out. Joel leans out the door, looking left and right. “It’s clear.”

Tess brushes past you as she heads out the door, Joel holding it open for her. You turn back to Ellie, who stands hesitantly in the middle of the room, concern clear on her face. “C’mon, kid,” you say to her, tilting your head towards the door. “The sooner we get this over with, the better.”

Without a word, she follows you out of the salon and onto the open street. As soon as you’re through the door, however, she lets out a quiet holy shit.

“Looks different in the daylight, huh?”

You can’t help but grin a little at the awe on her face as she takes in the half-toppled buildings, crumbled structures and piles of rubble, overturned cars and signs of destruction, but then, amid the signs of the city that had once stood, further proof that nature is taking back what once belonged to it. More moss and leaves and overgrown trees in every corner of every piece of concrete, flocks of birds flying from one building to the next. Sunlight glints off the few intact panes of glass left on a building in the distance, and it makes you squint.

Joel busies himself finding a high point, stepping up on a large piece of concrete to take a look around. He doesn’t look any more concerned than usual, but he glances at Ellie before looking to you. “We should get movin’.

You nod, falling back a step so you can move to his right side. “Let’s go.”

PREV | NEXT

[monsterfuckerconfessions]

I’m only 18 and I’d love to be fucked dumb by tentacles, to be filled with some purplish cum in every hole possible in my body.

Clit? No problem, let me have those alien babies that will proudly pleasure their human mother later with the wiggling of their tentacles inside my womb.

Maybe my ass and throat? Lovely primal idea, especially when the eggs could be safe inside my stomach’s toxins, making be feel so full that I don’t need to eat for weeks.

Piss hole? I don’t mind, it won’t impregnate me that way — hopefully.

I won’t count my nose and ears into that - to be honest - would be simply too disgusting.

But, just imagine;

At least five tentacles, if not ten, springing from the shower drain when you’re on your knees — masturbating yourself to heaven as your parents are partying outside the house. Twirling around your legs, arms, and latching on them to the point of making purple marks on your skin. As if it marked its territory, owning you so any monster in this world would know that you’re belonging to the famous tentacle monster, as an cute little host for its eggs to lay and adorably grow inside your womb, for them to be later hatched and used as living masturbators.

Then, turning off the water that sprinkles down at you and the eldritch animal, shoving you out from underneath the shower cube and pushing your face down to the floor. Your ass all plump presenting proudly up to the slimy and aching tentacles, before it could’ve push harshly pump itself inside and slurp out your earlier spilled orgasms that left it’s trails inside you. Fucking you raw and making you choke on another tentacles that was supposed to make you go quiet once you both heard your parents coming back from the night party.

Those wet sounds filling the small and private bathroom. Cunt being so filled, as another tentacle swirls into your ass, immediately filling you up from behind with it’s sweet cum, hoping that’s the right hole which will let it breed you and lay its children. But no, it wasn’t the one. So the tentacles gave another try.

Letting their purplish cum spill into your mouth, gagging you cutely and making you swallow forcefully their insides — still, no luck. Ah, so the last two holes had left.

There’s no time, parents are going upstairs, asking if you’re alright since the noises from upon aren’t letting them sleep peacefully. The monster shoves its tentacle out of your mouth so you could answer with a quick and almost moaned “I’M FINE”, before it could release into your piss hole, deliciously making you drip with its seed. But it still wasn’t it.

Last hole, only hope for the wild animal to breed you and pass it’s genetics further. It was only a minute before it pushed its tentacles through your clit, cervix, and straight into your womb — your brain now dumb on it’s tentacles dripping and drilling into you. Tongue lolling out and salivating the floor, rolling your eyes into your skull, begging the monster with small breaths to breed you. And it finally did. One, two, three — it’s all done. You’re full of it’s eggs that will soon grow in matter of days, ready to hatch and please you once more after giving birth to them.

Sliding out of your every little aching hole and sliding back into the shower drain, made you only whimper for more. Feeling ten times heavier and more plump, sitting up in the floor that was now covered in the purple cum, your saliva and release —creating a beautiful painting of history.

Minutes after, sitting up and with each move making the cum drip out of your holes, you rubbed your lower belly — already feeling the little babies grow so fast…

Maybe it wasn’t as bad as you thought… parenthood… but instead of normal human babies… thousands of tentacles.

.

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Probably a silly idea, but what do you think of trepanation/burr hole surgery as a method to extract living yeerks? 1. anesthesia/shave hair patch-- 2. drill small hole (~1 cm)-- 3. insert small sharp hook tool-- 4. slowly pull out yeerk-- 5. staple skin back. (ideally, this might work as a threat to continue the yeerk to exit, rather than needing to actually do it)

I think the issue is that the yeerk is too wound up in the brain for the two to be separated without damaging both. Like, if you think about a human brain, it's shaped like a wadded-up piece of paper, with a bajillion wrinkles and hollows. If the yeerk is within those wrinkles and hollows, I don't see a way you could get it out without cutting through large parts of the brain — which doesn't end well for the host.

If there was a way to "flush" the brain, like with procedures that drain out cerebrospinal fluid, that might be a more effective way of removing the yeerk. There's still tremendous risk to the host, as people developed everything from epilepsy to stroke after air ventriculography, but that's the best I can come up with.

[eldritch-spouse]

I wanna Rei to rail me. Can Rei rail me?

[Imagine I just said "No." Also, get fangirled.]

The short imp has been handing signatures out for almost half an hour now. And you had been drilling holes in the line to reach him, distracting people and almost getting into fights in the process.

It's so rare for Rei to do anything in the surface, you knew you couldn't miss it for anything when he announced he was performing close enough you could drive to. In only like two or three hours! There were stars in your eyes as you drove, you were so excited you thought you were going to rip the steering wheel off from how hard you were gripping it.

And there really is no comparison between seeing the imp on a screen and seeing him live. Sure, you got called ankle-biter a couple times when you jumped to see things better, but they sure didn't complain when you did bite the shit out of them.

Anyway- It's almost your turn to get your poster signed, and you're shaking in place like a rabid chihuahua an inch from frothing at the mouth. This is the first time you get to speak to him!! If you fumble this, you'll never ever forgive yourself. Just be normal. Yes, that's it, be normal.

The guy in front of you trots off, Rei immediately beckons you forward with a smooth smile and your heart nearly slips out of your throat directly into his hands. " Ey. You going to stand there? Take a picture! "

On auto-pilot, you step forth, almost crowding the demon in his own booth. Wow, those horns are even bigger up close. They look so cool too. You just want to touch them. " Uhm, hi- " What a wonderful crack your voice just made there. So suave. " I uh- So- Can you- My poster... "

Trembling hands fumble with said poster, trying to open it but failing miserably. The longer you take, the hotter your face gets, and you're sure you can hear him snorting. Eventually, the imp takes mercy on you and rips the thing from your grasp. " Sure, hun. Don't crumble on me, kay? "

He's fast and clean about it, a sense of fulfillment washes over you at the crisp signature on the bottom right corner. Fuck yeah. The poster is handed back to you rolled up.

" There ya go. " Rei winks.

God, he's so hot. You just want to kiss him. You know he'd bite, you studied up on his kind of demon! And besides, you've seen some of his... Less family-friendly stunts. Even if they're censored on the surface, you know he's not packing small at all. Steam escapes through your ears as you swoon. He's perfect.

" God, I wish you'd rail me- "

Immediate mortal shame makes you freeze like a statue. The heat drains from your body and you wheeze in embarassment. Oh God oh fuck oh shit you MORON- As you dart to grab the poster and run, hopefully to never see him again, you find Rei won't let go of it.

Looking fearfully down at him, the imp offers you a huge grin and cackles. " Oh you don't have to wish, cute stuff. Just wait a lil'. I'll gladly reil you... "

Putting aside the bewilderment, you shovel down the need to choke him for that awful pun. You're sure he'll appreciate that more in bed.

[five-rivers]

Life's Great Lie 16

AO3

Sand swirled on the flight deck. 

“I thought I told you not to do that while I’m driving!” snapped Jazz.

“It’s an emergency.”

Jazz twisted to look at Tucker.  “What, did something go wrong with--?”

“No, that’s all fine.  This, though?”  He pointed at the alien-spewing portal.  “This is an emergency.  Backup’s still got a ways to go before they reach the portal.  I came to scout things out.”

“How long is ‘a ways?’” asked Sam. 

“I don’t know.  You know how distances can get in there.  Maybe fifteen minutes?  I can pull a couple of people over with me at a time, like with Thor here, but—”

“Thor came with you?” interrupted Jazz. 

“Yeah, he’s—What the heck, how did he do that?  He’s huge.”

“Never mind that,” said Sam.  “Are you okay to keep using the staff like that?”

“I’m fine.  I’ve been managing my jerkish urges by being low-key kind of a jerk to Valerie.”

“That doesn’t sound like managing them at all, actually.”

“I’m fine.”

He didn’t sound fine.  But then, who was?  Not Jazz. 

“How’s the shield setup going?” continued Tucker, not giving Jazz a chance to dispute his statement. 

“Not great,” said Sam.  “Romanov got ahold of one of those bikes and we’re trying to get the generators set up on nearby buildings, but—” She summarized the rest of the technical problems (explosions, enemy forces, skyscraper roofs being really far apart) with a shrug. 

It really was too bad that Loki’s portal was so far up, and that they didn’t dare bring the Ops Center closer.  Then, they could have tried to encircle the portal with the Ops Center shield. 

But the blimp was not a match for space whales.  Or whatever those things actually were.  And they were still unclear on what forces Loki had in the building. 

Apart from Danny, who, really, was more than capable of drilling a hole through an unshielded Ops Center.

“How can I—Oh, heck.  He isn’t.”

“Isn’t what?” asked Jazz, trying to see what Tucker was so upset about.  She leaned forward and flinched as a gust of hot, sandy air scraped along the back of her neck.  “I hate that.”

“There!” said Sam, pointing. 

There was someone new on the roof of Stark Tower.  Two someones.  Thor, and now Tucker. 

“Oh, no, they’re both idiots,” said Jazz.  Her dramatic, tension-filled reunion with a mind-controlled family member could wait.  Why couldn’t Thor’s?

One of the computer banks beeped.  “We have incoming,” said Sam.  “Ten o’clock.”

“I see them,” said Jazz, spotting the small formation.  But the Ops Center didn’t have any power to spare.  All it had was going into the portal and the shields. 

“Should I go out?” asked Sam. 

“No way,” said Jazz.

“I have a bazooka.  And a jetpack.”

“That’s not—”

Something small and narrow arced upward into the lead glider, then exploded.   

“Oh, yeah,” said Sam.  “I’d forgotten about arrow boy.”

.

“Loki!  Turn off the Tesseract or I’ll destroy it!”

“Brother!” exclaimed Loki.  “Come, drink with me!  For the dawn of a new and more balanced age!”

Danny did not like that emphasis on balanced.  It sounded like something out of someone else’s mouth.   And Loki had said it, or something like it, before, to Iron Man, hadn’t he?  But Danny had other concerns at the moment.  “Hey,” he said, by way of greeting.  “So, before we start, is he drunk enough to be actually impaired?  He keeps telling me Asgardians are different and all, but I’m not super clear if he’s actually an Asgardian, like, species-wise, culturally, obviously, I mean.  Is he drunk?”

“What?” asked Thor. 

“Look, I haven’t slept in…  I just haven’t.  So.  Words.  Forget them.”  He pointed at Loki.  “Drunk?”

“I’m not drunk,” said Loki.  “I am merely showing Thor some hospitality.”

Thor scowled at them and turned his hammer on the Tesseract.  Naturally, it bounced off the shield, and Thor flew backward several meters. 

“Should I have warned him?” asked Danny.  He was sort of annoyed that Thor hadn’t at least answered the question about alcohol. 

“It wouldn’t have made any difference,” said Loki, draining another shot of alcohol.  “He never listens to me when I tell him things, anyway.”

“That might be because you’re sort of unhinged.”

“Oh, yes, so unlike SHIELD and Fury, using an infant as a soldier.”

A gust of sand blew over the roof, revealing Tucker. 

“Oh, hi, Tuck!” said Danny, waving.  “Here all by yourself?”

Tucker looked up, red flashing behind his glasses as he wobbled.  “A son of Ra never walks alone.  Wadjet rests upon my brow, Nekhbet shelters me with her wings.”

Oh, that didn’t sound good. 

“Finally,” said Loki.  “Someone who can give me a decent fight.”  He threw the glass aside and walked forward, only to be stopped by Thor. 

“No, brother,” said Thor.  “If you fight, you fight with me.”

“Well, sounds like it’s just you and me, then,” said Danny, pleasantly unsure about his odds against Tucker given their respective current states.  Ice crackled under his feet even as the air grew dry and desert-like.  To their side, Loki and Thor fought with more traditional means. 

Captain America and Black Widow zoomed by the tower on a stolen chitauri glider.  Both Danny and Loki noticed at the same time and turned to fire – Danny hoping Tucker would take advantage of the distraction, Loki for who knew what, considering he was still in the middle of a rather nasty sibling brawl, complete with hair pulling on both ends.

Thor tackled Loki and the bolt from the scepter missed.  Danny’s ectoblast didn’t.

.

It was only a slight graze, one that barely made the chitauri bike shudder, but it must have gone through something important, because although they weren’t in freefall, Steve and Natasha soon found themselves in a steep spiral.

Steve prepared to grab Natasha and jump.  Bleeding off even a little momentum meant a lot in these situations. 

But before they got close enough to the ground to do so, sand blasted up, buoying them up with enough force for Natasha to get more control and set them on the street in one piece even as individual grains of sand scored lines in their protective gear and sometimes their skin.  The sandstorm died down, revealing a street full of enemies, Stark Tower looming high above them, and other bikes hurtling towards the ground and exploding into fireballs.  The sandstorm had, apparently, been too much for them.  The street itself was, and there was no good way to say this, brutally shredded.  Not a single window on the block still had glass in it.  Was that where all the sand had come from?

The portal disgorged another huge creature, flanked by fliers.  Steve could spot what looked like hundreds of soldiers on it, made tiny by distance. 

“Well, plan A is screwed,” said Natasha, as they prepared to fight.  “What now?”

Steve touched his communicator – the Fenton Phone – then turned to slam a chitauri soldier into the ground.  He tossed the weapon to Natasha.  “Fentons,” he said, “we’ve been shot down.  Can you make a shield around the portals with the generators we’ve already dropped?”

“No can do, Cap!” shouted Jack Fenton.  “Any shield we could make right now would miss it by a mile!  Geometry’s all wrong!”

Steve looked up the tower again, casually deflecting an energy blast from one of the Chitauri.

“What’re you thinking?” asked Natasha. 

“What if we got some of the generators up on top of Stark Tower?”

“That might work,” said Maddie Fenton.  “We’re going to have to do some very fast and dirty math to get everything working, but I think it might work…”

There were screams – civilians – down the street, and Steve’s whole body twitched towards them.

“Give me the generators,” said Natasha, acquiring another weapon as her first one seemed to run out of charge.  “You go.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.  Given how big Stark Tower is, and how many people Loki probably had, sneaking through that place is more my thing, anyway.”

“And I can give you some tips!” said Stark, who had, of course, been listening in.

“Alright,” said Steve, already planning on how best to organize a civilian retreat.  He tossed the pack of shield generators to Natasha, who caught them easily. 

“Don’t die!” she said. 

“Don’t plan on it!”

.

Tucker jerked his staff sideways with a gasp, and that was enough of an opening for Danny.  He stepped forward, smoothly, winter in his wake, sliding past the not-quite-real vulture and snake that had faded into being around Tucker. 

Duulaman had given Danny a lot of trouble the first time around, throwing constructs in his path and warping reality as he saw fit.  But there was a lot to be said about experience. 

He grabbed Tucker’s wrist and squeezed.  The snake sunk its teeth into Danny’s shoulder.  They all hissed.  Danny looked into Tucker’s red eyes, and wondered if the color of his eyes was just as jarring to Tucker. 

Then, the red flared brighter and Tucker—

Tucker dropped the scepter.  The red in his eyes vanished immediately. 

“No, no, no, I can’t do that,” said Tucker, whose skin had taken on a clammy, sickly cast.  “No, nope, not doing that, oh my gosh—”

Danny grabbed the scepter and tossed it over the edge of the building.  Which was… okay, that could have gone better.  

“Sorry,” said Danny.

“Crap,” said Tucker, but he wasn’t a threat any longer, so Danny let him go.  He had his orders. 

Protect Loki. 

“Loki!” shouted Thor, even as Danny pushed him away and called up a shield.  “Look at this! Look around you! You think this madness will end with your rule?”

“It’s too late,” said Loki, voice cracking.  “It’s too late to stop it.  Any of it.”

“The army isn’t ours,” reminded Danny, helpfully, looking back.  He could see the knife between Loki’s fingers. 

The sounds of battle seemed to swell.  The shadow of one of the huge space whales passed overhead. 

“Get me out of here,” whispered Loki.

“Got it,” said Danny, and he pulled them both off the side of the building. 

.

Tucker didn’t know how much more of this his heart could take.  First, Captain America and Black Widow going down, then the sudden fear that he’d killed them with that glass sandstorm, then Danny getting the scepter from him and tossing it off the roof, and now Danny and Loki were skydiving without parachutes.

Please let them not have pancaked on the ground.  He knew Danny could tap his flight a little, even in human form, but there was still that fear.

“Call back your staff!” called Thor.  “We must go!”

“Wh—I don’t know what you can do with your hammer, but I can’t just call back that thing,” said Tucker.  “It’s probably broken into a million pieces on the sidewalk by now!”  And good riddance, honestly.  He could still feel something in the back of his head.  Something nasty. 

“Have you ever tried?  Tools like that tend to return to their rightful owners,” said Thor, taking a few steps towards him.  “I do not pretend to know what you are going through with this ‘past life’ of yours, but you can control it.  Just as Banner controls his anger, or any mage of my people controls the power that flows through them.  And you must.  This city depends on us.”

“Oh, no pressure, then,” said Tucker. 

“Good man.”  Thor patted him on the shoulder and then jumped off the building.  Great!  Great.  It wasn’t like there was any other way for him to get off this roof, what with Loki’s other forces in the building.  He was stuck on the roof alone!

“Ughhhh.”

Or maybe not so alone.  He pulled his emergency lipstick out of his pocket.  Not the best weapon against humans – and he had no idea what it would do to aliens – but it was better than nothing.  And how arrogant had the staff made him, that he didn’t think to get something more robust from the Ops Center before leaving? 

Near the portal device, an old man was sitting up, holding his head.  “Ugh, oh, no.  Oh, no.”  He stared up at the portal in awe and horror. 

“Hey,” said Tucker. 

The man jumped.  “Who’re you?”

“Who’re you?”

They stared at each other for a moment. 

“… are you pointing a tube of lipstick at me?”

He had pretty good eyesight for such an old guy. 

“It’s a deadly laser,” said Tucker.  Well.  It was a laser, and it did have an association with death, via ghosts, so.  It wasn’t like he was lying.  “Are you one of Loki’s people?  Did you help make this?”

“I—Not of my own will.”  The man got to his feet shakily.  “I was—The scepter.  You can’t—You can’t protect against yourself.”

“I know the feeling,” said Tucker.  “You know any way to shut it off?”

The man nodded, slowly.  “Yes.  Yes, we did.”

“You and Danny?”

“All of us.  Loki…  There’s something very wrong with Loki.”

“Cool.  So.  How do we do it?”

“We need Loki’s staff.”

.

After they’d fallen a few stories, Danny flipped them into the building.  Whatever Tucker had done had taken out all the glass, leaving Stark Tower, with its ultra-modern design, missing much of its outer walls.  Loki landed easily, which maybe, maybe supported his position that he wasn’t drunk. 

Maybe. 

He also caught Danny by the arm when he stumbled.

“What’s wrong with you?” he snapped. 

“Uh.  Not sleeping in days.  What’s wrong with you?”

Loki scoffed.  “Hide us,” he ordered. 

Danny turned them invisible.

“So… What now?”

“I should be leading this army,” said Loki, looking out into the city, his eyes slightly unfocused even as Thor swooped down from the roof and back out into battle.  “I should be directing them—They should be hunting down these heroes, not wasting time with humans that aren’t even warriors.”

Danny swallowed.  Loki was right – right both ways, actually.  The way the chitauri were fighting was stupid, but it wasn’t stupid enough.  Fewer people would get hurt if they were focused on people who could take it.  Except…  “You do know it isn’t your army, right?  You do—What happens,” Danny tried, a bit desperately, “when your boss comes through that portal?”

Loki froze.  His breathing went shallow.  “No, no, no,” he said.  “That was not our bargain.  I will deliver the Tesseract and the scepter to him.  He has no reason… no reason…” 

“What did he do to you?” pushed Danny.  If he knew it was something bad, then maybe…

Loki shook his head.  “I need to take command.”  His voice was flat, lifeless. 

“Okay,” said Danny.  “Elevator or stairs?”

Green light flared from above, and they both strode to the edge of the floor to look up. 

.

“We’ve got increased energy influx, kiddos!” said Jack over the Ops Center intercom.  “Get ready to adjust for momentum bleed-off, Jazzypants!”

“Right, right, right,” said Jazz, making sure she had a good grip on the controls.  If this wound up being a thing where they had codenames printed in the newspaper, and hers wound up being Jazzypants, she’d be committing some crimes. 

“Wait, what does he mean momentum bleed-off?” asked Sam, who had noticed what controls Jazz had and was now buckling herself in. 

“Ever notice that you slow down when you go through a portal?”

“Sped up a few times, too.”

“Well, that energy goes somewhere, so—”

The Ops Center lurched, and Jazz steadied it in the air, running the engines just enough to keep them in place.  The anchor was all very well and good, but it had limits, too. 

A familiar figure, smaller than the space whales but, but still huge, with a weapon held in each of her four hands, emerged from the portal, trailing dozens of smaller glowing dots. 

“Yes!” shouted Sam.  “They made it!”

And then the shield cut out. 

“Uh, we might have underestimated the juice the portal would take when actively transmitting.  Just a bit.”

[outlastrabbit]

May I request fluffy headcanons for Mother Gooseberry please?

Mother Gooseberry x Reader ‘Fluff’ Headcanons

From the first moment you became a reagent, the first moment you stepped up to the stage to grab that apple… Mother Gooseberry was intrigued. She grabbed your wrist and let Doctor Futterman do the talking, getting right in your horrified face with his bloody beak.

Before Mother Gooseberry got a good look of you, she was driving Doctor Futterman’s drill right into your palm. The sound of your terrified, pained screams roused her attention, and she quickly poked her head out from behind the curtain to look at you. Your teary eyes widened and locked with hers, the colour draining from your face at the pure insanity they held.

Mother Gooseberry thought you were so cute and sweet. She almost felt bad for hurting you! She chased after you through the mansion, wanting to keep you all to herself.

“You’re too delicate! You’re too precious! You can’t go!”

Alas, you left. So you could’ve imagined her joy when she met you again in the fun park. As soon as she saw you enter the trial, her crazed excitement grew. Her baby had returned!

You belonged to Mother whether you liked it or not. She cuddled you and kept you safe. She was your home. She never wanted to let you go and often just caressed your face, smearing blood all over it.

Mother Gooseberry rarely kept her hand off you. She even got into ‘arguments’ with Doctor Futterman, telling him he unfortunately could not drill a hole into your face. :(

Remember how that silly goose injured your hand when you first met? Good news! Mother Gooseberry patched you up, oh, so nicely. She even kissed your palm every chance she got, whispering how sorry she was in her sweet voice.

She loved to hold you at night. To stroke your hair and tell you how much she loved you. Mother did, you know? She really did love you.

“My little lamb…” Mother giggled softly as she ran a gloved hand through your bloody hair.

[ya-boi-haru]

Sherb has said that Icarus can't wear the goggles cause it would just full with blood... but couldn't they just drill little holes in the bottom? Like a little drain for the blood. It'd probs be a little messier but eye protection!

Speaking of eye things...

Rae put an eye of ender in a spyglass to see Auras before he put it in his face, could you do the same with other glass things? Like a little magnify glass, but for Auras. Or like a thing that Coraline uses to find the ghost eyes

And could Icarus put a little one in one those tiny ones that attach to the goggles?

In conclusion:

Give Icarus eye protection and Eye of ender monocles!

[starcrashx]

V.

This school wasn't different from the one that Galen attended so far. The only difference was that now he had Luke and Leia. The two took it upon themselves the big brother and big sister role although Galen was technically older than them by 3 months. When a boy wanted to make fun of him for being so skinny he could feel Leia's ten thousand yard stare drilling a hole into the bully. He was never alone because Luke always accompanied him almost everywhere. The only time he could get some alone time was when he went to the bathroom. All in all it wasn't bad and he enjoyed helping the two with homework.

"Galeeeeeen help meeee. Chemistry is killing me!"

"No! Galen help me please with algebra!"

"Why aren't you asking me for help?" frowned Anakin from across the table.

He got two judging stares from his kids.

"Come on! I'm really good at math." said Anakin.

"I can help you both so just sit down." motioned Galen.

After a good 2 hours of tutoring both of the twins got exhausted.

"Can we visit the Fett cafe please! I wanna eat the siblings special cake." whined Luke.

"Yeah sure why not. Galen was never in the cafe anyways." said Anakin.

The twins seemed to gain back their energies and sprinted out the door while yelling shotgun. Galen followed suit and got in the car. The ride wasn't long but it was sure loud. When they set foot in the store a familiar face greeted them.

"How is our favourite family?" asked Fives with a grin on his face.

"Hi Fives, Echo, Cody and Rex. We are fine thanks for asking. How is the business going?" said Anakin and shook hands with Fives and Echo who apparently were the waiters at the place.

Cody poked his head out of the back and Rex was at the cash machine.

"As busy as it gets. We had to bring in some helpers." smiled Cody and stepped out of the door, reviling two more family members.

"These are our cousins. Just call them Waxer and Boil."

"Nice to meet you!" smiled Waxer.

"We heard a lot about you guys." greeted Boil.

Anakin started chatting with Rex while Waxer took over the cash machine. Fives led the kids to an empty table and asked what they wanted. Leia requested a slice of matcha latte cake with lemonade. Luke asked for a slice of that super special cake with hot chocolate. Galen was a little lost between the selection.

"I think...a slice of vanilla cake will do." muttered Galen.

His social skills were better now with the ones he already knew but it was still far from perfect.

"But that's what you had for the welcome party too!" objected Luke.

"Let him have what he wants Luke!" scolded Leia.

"I know. But that's the only kind of cake I'm familiar with." replied Galen.

"Can I make a suggestion then?" asked Echo who popped out of nowhere.

Galen nodded.

"Do you like fruit Galen?"

Another nod.

"Then try strawberry cake! It's still a basic cake and it has vanilla cream in it too with white chocolate."

"Okay." said Galen and nodded at Fives.

For something to drink he simply wanted water. What can he say, he was a man of simple things. While waiting for their order Anakin found his way back to the kids because Cody accused him of holding up Rex.

"So how is school? Everything alright?" asked the father of the three.

"Good. Except that the Solo kid is around Leia again." said Luke and made a face.

His twin rolled her eyes.

"It's none of your business!"

"Well he knows the rules." said Anakin plainly.

"He didn't speak to me for two weeks because you scared him too much dad! Besides it's nothing, he is just a friend!" said Leia who was clearly annoyed by the topic.

"Han and Leia sitting on a tree-" started Luke but couldn't finish because Leia practically jumped at him from across the table.

Galen watches the chaos unfold he knew better than to interfere. So Anakin had to save his son from getting choked to death. After this Galen will have to find a silent corner of the house to read. His social battery is being drained right now.

"No killing Leia! And Luke, don't provoke your sister because if she gets really angry even god won't be able to save you!"

Galen snickered at that because it was true. However that caught the attention of the other three. Great. He can deal with this.

"What about you Galen? How is school?" asked Anakin.

"Well...not that bad. I mean...yeah it's fine." said Galen while debating if he should mention the fact that people pick on him sometimes or not.

"I like being with Luke and Leia. And I got a good mark in history."

Anakin smiled.

"That's great! I'm relieved that everything is fine then."

Leia and Luke looked at eachother and then back to Galen. But they couldn't question the missing information since Fives came back with the orders. Anakin got coffee and some chocolate cake. It was his regular order at the cafe. After the little dessert the kids went out to the car while Anakin was saying his goodbyes to the Fetts. Galen had to admit Echo's recommendation was good, a little too sweet for his taste but still fantastic. Leia approached him with a concerned look on her face.

"Why didn't you tell dad that some guys pick on you?"

"It's not a big deal. They just say some mean stuff. I'm used to it." said Galen dismissively.

And it was true he was used to this kind of thing. In his old school they used to pick on him for being weird and poor. Nothing new.

"Well we can deal with it for now right Leia?" said Luke confidently.

"I know I just don't want this to get any worse than it already is." said Leia.

"I will kick their tailpipes if they are mean to Galen again." offered Luke.

"That's...not necessary Luke but thank you. Both of you. I appreciate it." said Galen as he watched Anakin wave his last goodbye.

×⭐×

"Hold your sword like this." said Anakin and showed Galen how to hold his fake sword correctly.

The boy decided to try fencing. It could be a great topic between him and his new family. Obi-wan was practicing with Luke while Anakin was teaching Galen the basics. When the taller boy looked at his adoptive brother he couldn't help but get amazed by how good he is with a sword. But the same goes for the older members of the family. Ahsoka just spared with Anakin to put up a good show for her nephew.

"I'm going to have a contest tomorrow." said Ahsoka while watching Galen take some practice swings.

"And you will absolutely destroy the competition." smiled Obi-wan.

"Nah. Not this time. Barriss is also competing." said Ahsoka with a sad smile.

"That little! After all what she has done they still allow her to compete?" fumed Anakin.

"Yeah! She should be banned." agreed Luke which resulted in a playful smack from Obi-wan.

Galen glanced back and forth between Ahsoka and Anakin, looking for answers. In the end Ahsoka sighed, signaling that she gave in to her nephew's curiosity.

"Barriss Offee was my friend in high school. Her mom and Obi-wan were friends so we saw each other a lot. Barriss's mom was one of the judges of the Fencing Competition Committee so she also practiced fencing. So we started competing against each other and well..." trailed of Ahsoka so Anakin continued the story.

"Barriss became jealous of Ahsoka since she always was ahead of her and won most of their encounters. At the Fencing Championship they got paired against each other once again. Ahsoka won fair and square and when she turned her back Barriss charged at her and injured Ahsoka's leg. She was unable to continue the competition due to that injury and she had to be taken to a hospital. I thought Barriss was banned from competing."

"Maybe her mother lifted the ban." said Luke.

Obi-wan shook his head.

"Impossible. Luminara would never do such a thing. Even for her daughter."

"Then someone else did it." said Anakin.

"We will never know since someone was too lazy to attend meetings." pointed fingers Ahsoka.

Obi-wan made a dramatic sigh.

"Ahsoka Tano Skywalker Kenobi how dare you!"

Galen snorted and looked at Ahsoka. She signaled that of course that wasn't her real full name.

"What? It's true! I bet it's the new teacher that demanded all your attention." laughed Ahsoka, completely forgetting Barriss.

"You! Miss. Satine has nothing to do with this!"

"Obi-wan teaches history at Coruscant University. Miss. Kryze is the new politics professor." whispered Luke to Galen.

"He's a teacher? It kinda suits him actually." answered back the taller boy.

"Satine and Obi are sitting on a tree!"

"Agh what are you, five?"

"Déjà vu." sighed Galen.

"You are both five." said Anakin.

The two glared at him.

"I don't want to hear that from you Anakin "would it be fine to microwave the spoon too" Skywalker." argued Obi-wan.

"Yeah! Stay in your own lane Anakin "building a rocket to a car is a good idea" Skywalker!" said Ahsoka.

"You guys did not just go there!"

"Oh but we did!"

"They are supposed to be adults right?" asked Galen.

"I like your wording. Supposed to be. But they are literally sharing two brain cells." laughed Luke.

"At least Ahsoka isn't sad anymore." murmured Galen.

"Yeah. You could say anything to this family but you cannot say that we don't care about each other. We got everyone's back. And now yours too Galen." smiled Luke.

And for the first time in his life, Galen felt like he belonged somewhere.

[boliv-jenta]

Rockstar x f!reader

Not RPF, this is a character inspire by the look in the shoot.

Warnigns: Angst

Summary: Dating a man that the whole world wants a piece of can be hard.

I'd Give It All Up For You

Each blink of your eyes as you opened them to the sun felt strained. The trails of your long since shed tears dried on your skin. Sleep had come to you suddenly. The hours of crying finally caught up with you.

All the emotions tumbled like dominions. The resolute determination, into sadness, into regret, into more sadness. They swirled around you so fast that they drilled a hole right through you. Everything drained from you, leaving you numb. 

Rolling in your mass of blankets, you found your phone. The sight of it tore you open. Just one text and you were sure you could take it back. He'd begged and pleaded. Promises tumbled from his lips like the lyrics to his songs, yet they were even more heartfelt. You felt each one deeply and knew he meant every word. That's why you had been so determined to break up with him. 

I'd give it all up for you. I'll stay. We can get a house. We can go anywhere. Have kids, if you want. Just don't leave me. 

You knew he would do it. He'd give up all that he'd built over decades of hard work. Years of breaking his back carrying his own gear. Working two or three jobs at a time just to survive in the industry. To have enough money to hang out in the right place, to get his face in front of the right people. Just one word from you would be the end of it. The thought of it strengthened your resolve. You couldn't carry on living half a life with him. Life events that you wanted to share with him crammed in between tours and recording sessions or rearranged completely. Dates shared with his fans. The look of anguish on his face when he was torn away from you. No, it was too hard on you both.

A week later his things were collected by some strangers just doing their job. You asked him not to come near and he'd respected that. They took all of his carefully packed possessions. Except one, the ring from your finger. The last part of him you couldn't quite bear to let go of.

A month later the ring went, too. Carefully packaged and sent by courier. There was no note attached. All the words that had run through your mind didn't seem enough. News of your split broke. The hunger you saw in the eyes of the young starlets that met him increased now he was back on the menu. Rumours of him with numerous people ran rampant.

Six months later, you listened to his latest song. It didn't hurt as much as you thought it would. Your fingers tapped to the beat. His low voice tugging at the memories of him whispering in your ear didn't sting as much.

A year later, you sat in your favourite salon waiting for your hair appointment ahead of your first date that your friends insisted you go on. Truth be told, you hadn't taken much convincing as you made out. Your nights were lonely. The ghost of your ex, your only company. That's what he was now, your ex. Not your love. You didn't know him anymore. Now he was just some celebrity in a magazine. In fact you flicked through to his latest photo shoot. He had more grey in his beard than when you were together, it suited him. So did the outfits they had him in. It seemed like he was taking better care of himself now. That was good. A small tug at your heart came at the thought of him working out more now that he's back in the dating game. For a moment, while you struggled with that emotion, you flicked through the pages absently. The photo on the next page hit you like a bucket of cold water. The sorrow in his eyes hit first. You wondered why he would be looking at the camera like that in such a sexy, provocative shoot. Then you saw them. The rings that you had exchanged. His firmly back on his ring finger while yours sat between his perfect downturned lips. 

The look on his face made you long to cup his stubbled jaw and run your thumb soothingly over his cheek while telling him it would all be okay. That you still love him and it could work out between you. That half a life with him was better than not being with him at all. 

Then his words echoed in your mind “I'd give it all up for you.”

With a heavy sigh, you closed the magazine neaty just like you closed away your feelings. They could be unpacked another day. Nothing had changed in the past year, and you have a date to get ready for.

Author's note: Sorry for any mistakes. It wasn't proofread. I'm trying to clear my wips but throwing them up here.

[kawaiidoodles95-blog]

The Stranger Stampy Circus: Chapter 9

The ninth chapter of a long series I am making!

NOTICE: This is 11+! Throughout this story, there will be light mentions of blood, death, war, darker humor, and violence. While nothing here is explicit, if this bothers you in any way, keep on moving. Also, there is a kidnapping in this. Trust me. I won't be mad.

AN: I am making this not only on here but on google docs. This is a crossover between Stranger Things, Stampy's Lovely World, The Amazing Digital Circus, and Wonka. Each chapter will have a name of one of the characters (or main POV's I refer to them as,) and whoever's name is on the chapter title is the person narrating the chapter.

Anyways, enjoy TSSC!

Chapter 9: Vecna. 

As Pomni finished, a blood-curdling scream came from upstairs. “What the heck was that?! Pomni, Caine, stay here,” I instructed. Pomni and Caine looked at each other as I bolted inside and ran up the stairs. “Oh shoot,” I murmured to myself, “did someone hurt themselves?” However, when I ran past Willy’s room, I heard glass shattering and a “HELP ME” coming from inside.

“Hello..?” I said, opening the door. Glass was all over the floor, the entire room was discombobulated and glitching. And weirdest of all? There were some of Willy’s most powerful chocolates scattered across the floor; the Draining Pecans. “Holy heck, Hit the Target kidnapped Willy,” I said. “HTT must’ve broken through the window, then Willy tried resisting using the candies, but it wasn’t enough. I NEED TO CALL A LOCKDOWN.”

I ran upstairs into the control tower, and sent out the announcement.

“ATTENTION, ATTENTION! WE ARE ENTERING A LOCKDOWN! STAY WHERE YOU ARE, GET INTO THE NEAREST BUILDING IF YOU ARE OUTSIDE. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL.”

As I said that, a bunch of people outside just shuffled into buildings, and from where I was, it just looked like colorful mushes filling tiny ant holes. Then, there it was. The monster that had Willy tied in a bag. “Go’tcha,” I muttered to myself. The creature turned around and looked directly at me, as if it was asking to die.

What a fool was I. Thinking it would just stand there, I took my time setting up the canon. However, when I got to the control panel to fire it..

“SHOOT!” I screamed

The monster was gone! It just… vanished. “NONONONO!!!” I was panicking. How did I do this? I flew downstairs, almost tripping multiple times. When I got to the dinner table, I pressed the emergency meeting button under the table.

Soon enough, everyone came down. “So, Vecna, what is going on? I was just asleep, and then this loud beeping noise came on,” Jax said, rubbing his head. “Yeah!” Everyone at the table exclaimed. “Guys, this is serious,” I said. “Willy could be in danger!” Everybody looked at each other. “This is a life or death situation,” I continued. “So what do we do?” Pomni asked. “Do you think I know? That’s why I called the meeting; to get ideas!” I responded, slamming my face into the table. “What if a few of us head out to look for him?” Stampy suggested. I looked up, and smiled. “Good idea. Two people can come with me, while the rest watch over the town,” I explained. Stampy and Pomni raised their hands. “We can go,” Pomni volunteered. “Good, good,” I sighed in relief. “The rest of you; I am counting on you guys. Everybody else nodded. “Well what are we waiting for? Let’s get ready!” Stampy exclaimed

“Willy, dear friend, I am sorry for not protecting you. I love you.” I thought. I was grabbing materials for the trip, when I saw something. Another powerful candy of Willy’s; the explosive truffle bomb. “This is the only one. Let’s hope this works,” I whispered to myself, putting the candy in my pocket.

“I’m ready, Stampy and Pomni!” I called them.

[racoonpookiedepartment]

Pervy Krauser (Old Drabble)

A very old drabble i wanted to share Krauser x male Reader This was probably the thousandth time Krauser snuck into your room just to have sex, first he was obsessed with you and he has the power to kick you out whenever he wants so you're almost trapped with being with him. Every night would be the same, he would go to your room late at night after he made sure all the soldiers were sleeping besides you and sneak in with his master key. As much as he had all the power while working, with you was the only time you could be mean and not get in trouble for it. He was at your mercy while his hands were tied behind him and his cock was in your hands. First it would be you jerking off in front of him and forcing him to watch, he could struggle to break the ropes but after the first punishment he never wanted to again. That first night he cut through his ropes just to hold you he learned how much he hated edging. You edged him so much that his face was red and even the slightest touch he would be groaning, when you finally let him cum he’d basically made a small puddle in the bed, even then as much as he wanted to punish you for torturing him like that he couldn't. He couldn't deny that he loved how it felt and decided not to talk about it, even though every time he came to your room all he thought about was the night you had his face buried in a pillow with your fingers in his hole and was draining him with just one hand. Anytime he saw you during drills at all during the day he would have to go back to his office to hide the tent in his pants from other soldiers. But you were the only one he revealed himself to and he didn't mind. He didnt even mind the days when you would force him to just be a cock heater and didnt let him fuck himself on your cock, he couldnt touch himself either which made it worse when you would painfully slowly stroke him, but that was another lesson he learned, you were the only person who could make him feel that good and cum that much.

[just-a-silly-little-whumper]

Sleepless

Masterpost | Read on Ao3

Renata can't sleep. She quickly finds that Priya can't either.

For @whumpril Day 11: Can't Sleep.

Contains: Insomnia, exhaustion, complicated sibling relationships, some caretaking

~~~

There was a noise coming from somewhere inside the manor.

Once, Renata might not have heard it. But the transformation that had been forced on her had heightened her senses, making her hyper-aware of every shift and minor movement for what seemed like miles. It was something she normally didn’t mind, even reveled in, but now, when she was already finding it difficult to sleep, it came as nothing but a nuisance.

Heaving a deep sigh, she shoved the blankets off and stood. If she wasn’t going to be sleeping anyway, she might as well investigate what the noise was.

The manor was dark, but she could find her way through nonetheless, her gaze piercing even the veil of night as she made her way downstairs. The aggravating, repetitive sound came from below the main floor and its dark halls and elegant architecture. She made her way into the basement, eyes narrowing as the sound grew louder and sharper in focus.

The shuffling of footsteps. The clanging of metal. A soft, familiar voice grunting with exertion.

As silent as Renata was as she made her way into the training room, Priya still glanced sharply at her as she thrust her rapier into one of the training dummies. It pierced straight through the chest, joining one of several holes already made in the construct.

“What are you doing?”

“Training.” Priya’s voice was monotone as she stepped back, readied herself, and lunged forward again. A slight scowl flickered across her face as she impacted slightly to the left of where the dummy’s heart would be. “Why are you here?”

“Couldn’t sleep. Heard you making noise.” Renata crossed her arms. “Why are you training in the middle of the night?”

“I couldn’t sleep either.” Her motion to return to her ready stance wasn’t as fluid this time. Hesitation or exhaustion? “I figured I might as well use this time for something useful.”

To anyone else’s eyes, Priya’s lunge might have looked the same as the ones prior. To Renata, her thrust into the center of the dummy was just a bit slower than before. “And how’s it going?”

“Fine.” There was the slightest edge in Priya’s voice as she drove the rapier further in. “Did you need something?”

Her hand shook ever so slightly as she tugged the rapier back out. Renata narrowed her gaze. “No, just— are you okay?”

“I said—” Priya changed her stance and spring forward again. Her thrust went wide, and a growl crept into her voice— “I’m fine.”

“Clearly. You’re really nailing these basic drills. No signs of exhaustion at all.”

“Renata—!”

“Look.” Renata swiftly cut Priya off as she whirled on her, face tightening in frustration. Renata didn’t flinch. “There’s only so much you can do with a dummy. Why don’t we spar? I’m up anyway; I could use a workout.”

For a long moment Priya didn’t move, instead studying Renata with an intense gaze. Then some of the tension drained out of her. “Alright. But only a few rounds. I don’t want to keep you up too long.”

“You’ve been up far longer than I have.”

“And?”

“I just don’t think it’s fair for me to have to go to bed before you do.”

Priya didn’t quite roll her eyes, but the exasperation on her face was clear. “Fine. After we spar we’ll both go to bed. Deal?”

Renata grinned, already making her way over to the rack of practice weapons. “Deal.” It was clear Priya needed the sleep, and this seemed like the best way to get her to do it. And if Renata ended up tired enough to ease her insomnia, all the better.

[forasecondtherewedwon]

I don't know if you take prompts but if you do, would you consider a Phoenix x Hangman fic of him comforting her after Rooster taking a random girl out after a night out??

Bullshit (You Can Be Mine)

Fandom: Top Gun: Maverick Pairing: Jake “Hangman” Seresin/Natasha “Phoenix” Trace Rating: T Chapter Count: 1/2

The night before they find out who stays and who goes, everything’s up in the air but them.

Of course, it’s a little less of a mystery to Jake after Maverick walks into the Hard Deck, all aglow in his whites. Team Leader. Huh. Well, the old man earned it, flying that course like none of them could. Though they’ll have to, and soon. And for real. Six spots on this mission, five left to fill. Jake thinks about going over there to ask Mav who it’s gonna be. He stares so long, so intently, that the rest of the candidates who’ve gathered around the pool table—racking the balls with enthusiasm and then too solemn to finish a game—notice and follow Jake’s gaze.

He hears the whispered word “wingman” and it already feels like they’re talking about him, only Jake can’t know for sure yet. Neither can Rooster. He doesn’t actually know where Rooster is and he’s glad; he’s not in the mood for another confrontation. Everything’s out of their hands now. They don’t need to argue over who the best choice is because they’ll be told that tomorrow.

Jake tips his bottle up and drains the final swallow of the beer that’s been keeping him company since he got here. He retreats to the edge of the group, still keeping his eye on Mav at the bar, and finds new company in Bob.

“Hey, man,” he says quietly, taking the stool next to him.

Bob nods in greeting and offers him the container of peanuts. Jake scoops up a handful, palm immediately greasy, fingernails crystalline from the generous coating of salt. He tosses one into his mouth and sucks until his tongue tingles.

“I’m not surprised,” Bob says. He’s looking Mav’s way too.

“’Bout what?”

“That they made Mav Team Leader. It’s what he wanted when he came here.”

Jake frowns and glances at Bob from the corner of his eye.

“He tell you that or are you just a mind reader?” he asks.

“It was obvious,” Bob says, but he’s not bragging. “Besides, he’d do anything to protect us. You’ve noticed that, right? He’s the only person in command who’ll swear we’re coming home and actually believe it. Like it’s him against destiny or something.”

There are goosebumps on Jake’s arms.

“You think it’s our destiny to die?” Which is the one question he should not be asking tonight. Superstition, morale, just being a fucking downer—there are countless slants to put on why it’s bad form to acknowledge death out loud, and so close to the hour when five of them plus Mav will fly to meet it head-on.

Bob continues to prove he has no sense of humour by laughing.

“How should I know?” he asks with a broad smile. “I just think that, if it is, Maverick Mitchell would be the one to change it.”

“You have a lot of faith in him.”

“I’d feel safer following Mav into this than anybody else.” Bob blinks and looks at Jake. “No offense.”

Jake doesn’t say anything. Secretly, he’d feel safer following Mav too, but he won’t admit it. He could still be assigned to Dagger Two and if he’s paired with Phoenix and Bob, he doesn’t want Bob to have any doubts about his nerve. The first time Jake was up there with Mav, flying those drills, he decided what he wanted to learn from his instructor was how to wield that much badassery, how to make people go, Holy shit, it’s Hangman, when he walks into a room. Now, what he’d like to take away from these short weeks is Mav’s ability to make people feel safe. He wants people to believe he’ll bring them home.

They go back to crunching their peanuts and Jake watches Mav leave the bar with Penny. The two of them stay close as they head for the door, his hand gentle on her back. It makes Jake feel like he’s got a peanut stuck in his throat, that tender familiarity between his Team Leader and the proprietress of his favourite watering hole. He has to remind himself that he doesn’t want that. He can’t want that, not when his flight style is balls-to-the-wall and he decided years ago that he was better off as solo down here as he is up there. Nobody to pack up their life and move with him when he’s posted someplace new, nobody to feel guilty about leaving as he fires the engines and launches off a carrier at dawn, the big, molten nectarine of the sun glinting off the canopy. Jake doesn’t do guilt. He doesn’t do love.

He tries to reengage with the rest of the candidates, half-heartedly heckling Payback when he fails to sink a straight shot, but Penny’s got the bar all lit up tonight, even out back, where the nightly rush has spilled over onto the patio; the radiance makes Mav’s white uniform show up like a glow-in-the-dark plastic star against the dark beach beyond.

Perched on his stool, Jake can see over the heads of the happy, normal people outside and, thanks to Penny’s aggressive illumination techniques, it’s easy to observe more than just his own reflection bouncing off the windows. Penny and Mav stay fairly distinct as they walk down towards the water. When they embrace, Jake finally looks away from them. He can be a nosy bastard when it suits him, but they’re clearly having a moment, and something in him burns to witness it. The only thing he's ever held sacred is himself.

His gaze sweeps across the beach and lands on another pair. Jake snorts. Everybody and their fucking alone time. He prefers to surround himself with people—not that he’s all that engaged at the moment; Bob’s social demands would probably fit in his shirt’s breast pocket. Jake peers at the couple outside long enough to realize they’re dressed the same. They’re dressed the same because they’re in uniform. Unconsciously, he leans forward on his stool. Is that…? It’s Phoenix and Rooster. Well, they’ve always been close. If they wanna take comfort—

But there’s a different dynamic there than the one he saw between Penny and Mav. Jake squints and studies them. Phoenix has her arms crossed, but not like she’s bossing Rooster around, more like she’s feeling vulnerable. She takes a step towards Rooster and… he puts a hand on her shoulder. Jake winces. Uh oh. When Phoenix jerks away from him, Jake expects her to come storming back into the bar. Instead, she takes off down the beach and Rooster just stands there for a few seconds before he turns and strolls back towards the patio.

“Crap,” Bob breathes next to him.

Jake jumps.

“Jesus, Bob.” He forgot the WSO was there. Evidently, they just watched the same thing happen.

Bob goes to stand, but Jake finds himself gripping his arm to keep him in his seat.

“I’ll go,” Jake says.

Bob looks at him. It’s been a while since Jake’s flown with a back-seater, and when he did, all he ever did was scare the poor sonofabitch—ignoring his suggestions, distrusting anything he reported seeing that didn’t come from radar, throttling into tight turns and steep dives when his co-pilot advised caution. They didn’t exactly forge a lifelong bond. Bob, on the other hand, might not raise a stink when Jake snatches his pool cue, hogs the peanuts, or tests out different possible meanings for B.O.B. (“Baby On Board” was genius though), but Jake notes a protective streak flaring up in him now. He’s just come between a co-pilot and his pilot and he can see in the suddenly steely eyes Bob has behind those grandpa glasses that he’s prepared to take countermeasures. Jake removes his hand from Bob’s arm and holds up his palms to show he means no harm.

But he still isn’t able to make himself sit here without knowing what just happened between Rooster and Phoenix.

“I’ll go,” he reasserts.

At last, Bob nods. In a moment, he seems completely relaxed again, reclaiming the container of peanuts as Hangman steals a damp napkin out from under somebody’s condensation-beaded beer and wipes his hands clean.

“I’m not going to upset her,” Jake feels obligated to say. Bob might look relaxed, but Jake knows better now than he did a minute ago.

Bob’s watching the pool table and barely spares him a glance.

“I know.”

It isn’t a vote of confidence—it’s a soft-spoken threat. Despite himself, Jake grins.

“Alright,” he says. “You sit tight.”

He circles their group and pushes outside onto the patio as Rooster’s coming in. Their shoulders brush at the threshold and Jake pauses to pin Rooster in place with a knifelike smile. Easy, he tells himself. You don’t know what happened yet.

“What?” Rooster demands.

Jake, still grinning, says, “Nothing. You doin’ ok?”

Rooster narrows his eyes.

“I’m fine.”

“If you wanna stay fine, stay away from Bob.”

“What’d I do to Bob?”

“Not a damn thing,” Jake assures him. “It’s what Bob’ll do to you that I’m warning you about.”

Jake leaves Rooster standing there and steps out into the swell of sound on the patio. He strides to its edge, looking out into the dark, but he can’t see Phoenix anywhere. He sighs. She’s a big girl who can look after herself just fine without his interference. It’s not like she’s hurt or lost or in need of his assistance in some way—most likely, she wouldn’t want him going after her and if his presence really gets on her nerves, it’ll be his balls in need of assistance. He shouldn’t bother, only... tonight being what it is, it may be the only time he has left to bother.

He goes to the parking lot and gets in his truck. Driving away from the Hard Deck and the little clump of closed shops and restaurants in its immediate vicinity, Jake scans the sides of the road. If she stayed on the beach, he won’t find her. His entire strategy rests on the fact that she had shoes on and that it sucks to walk on sand when you’re wearing shoes. He’s cruising slowly down the quiet main street, starting to wonder if he’s gone too far, when he notices a big lit-up rectangle on his right. The community’s turned an empty, weedy lot into a drive-in theatre for the night. Between two tall trees hangs a screen made of what he assumes to be sewn-together bedsheets, maybe sails. The slight sag in the screen makes Jeremy Renner’s projected forehead extra wrinkled, but Jake’s eyes only stay on the movie for a couple of seconds. At the near end of the lot stands a woman with stiff posture and hair in a tight bun. Jake palms the wheel to pull off the road and onto the overgrown lawn in reverse, parking beside her.

She looks at him as he hops out of the truck.

“What’s your excuse?” she asks.

Jake shrugs.

“Don’t have one. I saw you leave—”

“And you couldn’t mind your own business?”

“Hey,” he says, “if we fly this thing together tomorrow, your business is my business. I need to know you’re ok. For professional reasons.”

That provokes the smile he was hoping to get out of her and he smiles in return.

“God forbid I get distracted up there and make you look bad,” Phoenix jokes, even though they both know she won’t get distracted. On a run like this, distracted equals dead.

“I’m glad you understand.”

Jake crosses his arms and waits. Phoenix’s gaze goes to the ground, searching idly among the weeds. He’s said enough that it’s up to her now whether she chooses to let him know what’s going on or tells him to fuck off.

“You like this one?” he asks instead, nodding towards the screen. A dark room that looks out onto a bay. Tandem rotor choppers lifting off of a field against a pink sunrise. The final minutes of Arrival. There’s a large sign near the screen with the radio station viewers should turn to for audio, but he doesn’t.

She thinks about it, then says, “Yeah.”

“I always found the ending kind of…” Jake scrunches his face up. “…sad. Fate. Destiny,” he says, borrowing Bob’s word from earlier. She can see her whole life, but she can’t change it.”

“Maybe it’s a relief.”

“Maybe it’s depressing,” he counters, smiling. “Where’s the control?”

“Life isn’t about control,” Phoenix argues.

“Uh, yeah it is. What’s your job again? We live and breathe control.”

“Our control is just someone else’s uncertainty. And vice versa. It’s not constant, it’s… like that.” She gestures at the screen, where mixed-up moments of the same life are flicking past. For a moment, he looks with her. Then he looks at her, at the soft focus on Phoenix’s face when her eyes aren’t boring challengingly into his.

“You wanna watch the end of it?” he asks rather than continue the debate.

“Sure.”

Jake drops the tailgate and they hoist themselves into the bed of his truck. He has a sleeping bag tucked into one corner and Phoenix eyes him knowingly as she unrolls it and they spread it out.

“Slick,�� she comments.

“It’s a move,” he admits unselfconsciously.

She shakes her head at him, smiling, as they sit facing the screen.

“I bet it works too. Unless it rains.”

Jake glances at the cloudless night sky.

“I think we’re good.”

“I didn’t mean it’d work with me,” she says.

“Why not with you?” he teases, looking at the side of her face until she looks back at him.

Phoenix rolls her eyes.

“Rooster didn’t tell you anything?” she asks. She sits forward, folding her arms over her knees.

“He did not, which is a real surprise when you consider what good friends we are.”

Not even a smile at that. Not good.

“Rooster…” Phoenix begins. She sighs and draws it back over her like a blanket—the attitude, the toughness. “…was about to go home with somebody. He was outside on the patio with her, standing too close, smiling at everything she said. I could see them through the window. I could hear his fucking laugh—god, this is embarrassing,” she bursts out.

“That you were spying on them? Definitely. You should feel bad. I would never do anything like that.” She shoots him a warning side-eye. “Please continue,” he says.

“You’re just going to be a dick about it.”

“I’m not, I swear.”

“You don’t get it,” she says. “You have no idea.”

Jake doesn’t even realize the movie’s over and the credits are rolling until the cars start to leave. Headlights sweep across Phoenix’s face. Her dark eyes and hair. Her anger and injured pride. He might have some idea.

“Tell me anyway,” he requests.

It takes four more cars passing by before she speaks. He gets her in these flashes of light. It’s not unlike when they’re in the air at the same time, dogfighting or practicing the run in formation, and her voice comes over the comms. Just these little bits of her, one sense at a time. Jake swallows and tries not to stare so goddamn hard.

“I figured it was now or fucking never,” Phoenix says. “I went out there and told Rooster I had to talk to him, took him aside… and he turned me down. He said he doesn’t want to be thinking about me up there—said he doesn’t know whether or not he’s going, but he’s sure I am. I think he thought it would mean too much.”

“You propositioned Bradshaw?” Jake asks, just to be very, very clear.

“Correct.”

“And he said no?”

“Damn, Hangman, it is so fun to relive this with you.”

“He’s an idiot,” he states.

“I’m the idiot,” she says, and he’s worried that she’s reflecting too hard and missing that he’s genuinely on her side. He’d be on her side no matter who the guy was. He’d be on her side if he were the guy—though he would never have let Natasha Trace beckon him out under the stars and then said no to her.

“I know he doesn’t want to think about me,” Phoenix continues. “He already doesn’t think about me. I never hear from him. He never calls. Even when we’re in the same bar, he only talks to me through the piano. It’s bullshit. He’s a terrible friend.”

She shuts her eyes and shakes her head at herself.

“Funny how you can decide something like that and then ignore it completely,” Jake says. He’s thinking about Phoenix allowing Rooster to disappoint her. He’s thinking about certain things he’s decided for himself, things that make the apartments he rents so quick to pack up and the plus-one spots on his Navy event invites go unfilled.

“Is that control?” Phoenix asks wryly, resting her chin on her arms.

“No, but it’s only because Rooster’s wrong.”

“What’s he wrong about, Bagman?”

He’s losing her to bitterness and the light of the last cars exiting the lot. What’d she say? Now or fucking never?

“The idea that thinking about someone up there is bad. That’s the kind of thing that keeps people alive,” Jake insists. “It’s a reason to stay sharp, to come home. And if Rooster doesn’t, I do.”

“Do what?”

It’s hard to breathe, like there’s too much gravity pressing on his chest.

“Want to be thinking about you,” he forces out.

Phoenix lifts her head and turns to stare at him. From her expression, she wants to let out a snide laugh, but he is, unfortunately, serious. Jake laughs awkwardly when he sees her start to understand that.

“Yeah,” he says, pre-empting her response. “It’s the truth, Trace.”

She looks at him hard.

“You’re trying to fuck with Rooster’s head,” she accuses.

“Rooster’s not even here.”

“You’d tell him, or you’re hoping I would. I’m not going to do something just to hurt him. That’s not what he deserves, and it’s not who I am.”

“This is not about goddamn Rooster!” Jake practically shouts in exasperation.

His reaction time is excellent, but he still feels a lag when Phoenix quickly unfolds herself and swings one leg over his thighs. He pulls her down, pulls her in, fingers tense on the back of her neck as they kiss hard and fast. The nylon outside of the sleeping bag skids against the truck bed. Jake doesn’t know how Phoenix has enough air to ask why his mouth tastes like peanut butter because he can hardly breathe.

She’s kissing his neck and his fingers are flying down the buttons on her shirt before something snags inside of him—a tailhook on an arresting wire. He leans back against the cab and Phoenix lifts her head in confusion.

“It’s not about Rooster for me,” he says carefully. “I guess it is for you.”

She sits back on his thighs with her shirt half undone, still breathing heavily, but deflating.

“We’ve all known each other a long time,” she says.

“Yeah.” He watches her, then cracks a smile. “I know you’ve been hot for me too. On and off.”

Phoenix cocks her head consideringly and nods slowly, not about to deny it.

“I might’ve done something about it,” she says, “but you’re always such a smug asshole.”

Jake grins.

“And I probably would’ve let you, even if you are a boring goody two-shoes.”

He sees her half-smile.

“It’s aaaall about the timing, isn’t it?” she asks. It’s a rhetorical question. Of course, everything in their lives comes down to seconds, and how many slices you can cut a second into when it’s life or death.

“You really want Rooster?” Jake asks her plainly.

“I didn’t want to be alone.”

He thinks she’s brave to say it. He definitely hasn’t been able to.

“That’s a good enough reason,” he promises, scanning his eyes over her without heat. To do this, he means. To fuck because they might both fly out and never come back.

“Yeah,” she agrees. “So why aren’t we?”

But her smile is regretful and he isn’t disappointed. They’re both experts on instinct and this doesn’t feel right. Even if he likes the weight of her on top of him. Even if it feels good in a completely nonsexual way when she tugs at his shirt so the creases are clean and straight. She’s right—they’ve known each other a long time. The day Phoenix and Bob’s engines caught fire, when they were still fighting to correct it, Jake clamped his fist around a pen so hard that it snapped and bled all over his hand. Once they ejected cleanly and everyone listening was breathing again, he barreled out of the room and spent an hour hunched over a sink with the water running, even after all the ink was gone.

She climbs off of him, buttoning her shirt as they kneel, him rerolling the sleeping bag, her stuffing it into the case. They jump out of the back and he slams the tailgate.

Inside the truck, Jake hesitates before starting the engine. He looks at her in his passenger seat, the faint blue light from the dashboard shining up her neck. The shadows retreating from the glow don’t matter; her face is one of the most familiar he has in his life.

“If it’s alright with you,” he says, “I’m still gonna think about you.”

Phoenix leans across the console and kisses him softly. Drawing back, she touches his cheek.

“I’ll think about you too.”

[voiceoffenrisulfr]

Hail Hydra - Chapter Nine

Things begin to reach their climax, and an announcement reaches the Soviet compound. CW: Forced to kill; death of PoWs; mentions of torture, neglect and abuse; gun violence. Prompts met; ‘The Gift of Gunpoint’ (Alternate) – December 9th prompt, Dead Dove December, ‘Paranoid’ – December 9th prompt, Hurtcember 2023, ‘Brainwashing’ – December 9th prompt, Whumpcember, ‘Can’t Open Their Eyes’ and ‘Feeling Weak From Blood Loss’ – Winter Wonderland Bingo, “Are You Serious?” – Fandom-Free Bingo.

Check it out on AO3 here, or read below the KR with the boards!

There was no respite for me because of my injury, my body being pushed ever further to new extremes, hours upon hours spent running up and down an isolated corridor, seeing how long I could keep sprinting before my exhausted, dehydrated, starved and beaten muscles gave out, and I was dragged back to my cell by my hair. Every ounce of my food was carefully measured, keeping me weak and pliable – not that it was needed. I saw Aleksi daily, his eyes flicking away from mine as I sought his gaze, and I knew, just as he did, that I would remain true to my word; there would be no disobedience from me. Not now. Despite my exhaustion, even I couldn’t help but notice the unrest that began to settle over the compound. I was left in my cell for days at a time, my wounds actually managing to heal before I was subjected to more tests and experiments. I began to feel myself descend into madness and paranoia in my isolation – was this the beginning of the end? Had I almost fulfilled my purpose, and I would soon be disposed of? The idea of not surviving this, having been through so much, was a painful one. For a while, I’d prayed for death, willing an ending to my torture through any means possible. But after months, I’d come too far to give up, and I was determined to see this through until I was free once more. Even in the height of summer, the temperature rarely rose above moderate, but at least the snow melted from the ground – so when I was dragged outside, blinking in the harsh light, my feet found dry earth rather than patches of ice. “Where are you taking me?” I snarled, jerking against my restraints through obligation rather than any real effort or expectation. “Shut up,” Ivan growled, jerking back just as readily. I’d felt the power in my muscles; I knew that if I really wanted to, I could snap him like a twig. But I was drained, both physically and mentally, and I’d long lost the will to fight. I was pushed to my knees before the doctor, wincing into the sun as I raised my gaze to meet his. “You know the drill, Американский,” he breathed, leaning close, his rancid breath washing over my face. “You obey, or the boy dies.” “Yes, Sir,” I replied stiffly, my back tense and nervous. The torture, the tests – it had all become routine and predictable. But here was something new, and I felt sweat bead under my hairline at the thought of the insidious new hell I’d face. “Двигаться! Move!” I turned my head in time to see a string of almost two dozen men dragged out of the compound, chained to one another and dishevelled - but markedly better kept than myself. They were lined up before the doctor, all but one trembling in their hole-riddled boots; the man on the end stood with an air of resilience, a worn American flag on his sleeve, the chevrons on his shoulder marking him as a sergeant - like myself. He nudged the man beside him - a young man with his head bowed and fatigues shredded beyond recognition - who raised his chin obligingly, tears carving tracks through the grime on his cheeks.

"Free the Germans and the Japanese," the doctor barked, eyes narrowed. The soldiers looked on in disbelief as their shackles were released, standing hesitant and nervous, until their seemingly-merciful captor waved his hand. "Go. If you can make your way off the mountain, you can go home. The war is over, and you have lost. We have no use for you anymore." With a glance at one another, the man began to trudge away - some at a stumbling run, others barely able to stand.

I'll be amazed if half of them make it off this mountain alive, I remarked internally - but I knew better by now than to voice my opinions.

The two remaining soldiers – the Sergeant and his companion – still stood with their chins high, staring down the doctor with something akin to disinterest, though the occasional wobble of the youth’s lip betrayed his fear. “А Aмериканцы?” the Soviet soldier by their side pressed, glaring   Americans? Both of them? The doctor’s gaze shifted to me, chilling me to the bone as he smiled viciously. “Let us test your obedience, soldier.” I don’t know what’s happening… But I don’t think I’m going to like it. “Stand.” “You obey this Russki, soldier?” the Sergeant snapped, glaring as I rose to my feet. I ignored him, my eyes emotionless as they found the doctor’s, and he offered me a gun, grip first. “Show them mercy, Американский.” I weighed the weapon in my hand, and the Soviet by the soldiers stepped forward slightly, earning a warning glare from the doctor. I could shoot him right now. I could end this. My eyes flicked around me, taking in the dozen of Soviet soldiers gathered around – and the countless more out of my sightline. I’d probably be dead before he hit the ground, and Aleksi would be close behind. They wouldn’t be allowed to walk out of here anyway. I looked instead to the soldiers, the Sergeant’s eyes widening in disbelief. “Are you serious? You’re an American! Have they brainwashed you?” “Silence, soldier!” the doctor snapped, turning a glare to him, one hand finding my shoulder firmly. “You know what to do.” I know what to do. My hand shook despite myself as I raised my gun level, quickly and calmly burying a bullet into the younger’s forehead. He doesn’t need to see his superior officer be sh- The logical decision-making of my mind was brushed aside as the Sergeant charged, snarling, my shot coming panicked and unsteady, slicing through the soft skin under his jaw. He stumbled as he reached me, falling to his knees, crimson pumping over the dirt-encrusted uniform as his lip curled in a death glare. My eyes closed automatically as he reached for me weakly, shutting out the sight of this torturous display, even when the doctor growled in my ear and grasped my jaw warningly, lids glued together in horror. “Open your eyes, or the next bullet will be for the boy. And he will not go so quickly.” Reluctantly, forcibly, I resumed staring down at the Sergeant sinking  slowly, sitting on his feet as the light began to fade in his eyes. “Traitor,” he rasped, his head lowering for the first time. “Tr… T…” Tears flowed silently down my cheeks as he collapsed, his blood spreading across the dirt in a gritty puddle, pooling around my feet and staining my skin. I’ll never be clean again.

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