#if you happen to be nearby and can show up I'd appreciate it

[friendofthecrows]

Strawberry festival is tomorrow and I'm doing a tea booth for the first time. I'll sell some antique teaware as well as custom blends.

Kind of sad because my teacup collection is HUGE but unfortunately it is So Huge that I no longer have any room. So some must go. Idk if anyone will want to buy them though, I'm not sure there's many tea fanatics in the area. The custom blends I think will do somewhat better.

So to momentarily doxx myself, outside the Unitarian Universalist church in Mendon I'll be selling tea and tea things!

There will also be other be other vendors, strawberry shortcake, and of course you've heard me talk about the old bookstore. We always haul a few bins of antique and modern books alike outside for the fair, but you can also go into the church and see the rest of the books.

It's a secular community event, not that it matters much since UU is non-denominational anyways :)

[chao-thicc-hcs]

Hello good sir, I was wondering if you would take the time out of your day and consider making a headcannon of the TR characters "mikey, izana , sanzu, south" reaction to "there s/o being attacked and beaten for being in a relationship with them"

I would very much appreciate if you made this HC but I do understand if you did not, thanks for indulging me🙏

a/n: it's miss ^^ Sorry for the long wait, I was burn out and tired from work.

↧ next time, for anyone wondering, please specify what timeline you want the characters to be from, especially mikey and sanzu, cuz yk

Their s/o being beaten up because they're in a relationship with them

featuring: bonten!sanzu and mikey; toman!mikey; south terano, izana kurokawa

warning(s): mentions of blood, beating up, reader being hurt, mentions of guns and drugs

n o t p r o o f r e a d !, will be edited in the future.

toman!Mikey↷

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you had a date with Mikey a little bit before a gang meet up, but you were late, something that was VERY unusual of you

he was worried and roamed around the place like a fly without its head

until you came crying to him, bruised and cut all over your body

he froze on the spot and immediately wrapped his hands around you

he was shaking, asking you what happened and all that

you had to calm down and catch your breath before being able to form a coherent sentence about what happened

you were walking to where your little date was going to take place, and a group of gang members cornered you in an alley and started punching you

thankfully, there was a cop nearby who heard your screams and scared away the assaulters

he will be furious, lifting you up and carrying you to the place where you were attacked

asks you to tell him the dudes that attacked you

if you remember correctly and show him who they were, he will start beating them up immediately. He won't care where you are

A cafe? A park? School?? He don't give a damn, he's launching on them like a rottweiler on a piece of meat

after you've successfuly ran away from the cops (if it was a public space) Mikey will take you to his room and start hugging you

He doesn't let go at all. He has his arms wrapped around you while you're laying on him, and groans if you try to move the slightest

very cautious onward. always making sure you're with him or with someone from Toman to protect you just in case

he knew that eventually, he had to face such occasion, but he's not going to let you go - he will make sure to do everything he can to protect you and instill fear in his enemies, so they don't ever touch you

finds the leader of the gang and beats them up heavily, making all the members watch, then he beats them up too

deffo asks you to sleep over for a couple of days so you can calm down and have fresh memories of him hugging you and just loving you

glares at everyone

i'd like to think nobody from Toman knows you're dating, because he is afraid that someone might be a traitor and try to do something to you

and he keeps you even more in secret, making sure you don't even look at any familiar gang faces of Mikey's, but he doesn't dare being sneaky behind your back. you have his heart, after all <3

The boy was hugging you under the dim lights of his room. It was already 8pm, and you were too tired to even bother going to your own home. The past events left both of you shaken, especially Mikey, who held you tight in his arms, as if you were about to slip away from his embrace.

He knew there will be more occasions like these, and that he had to protect you. Looking at your relaxed expression, his gaze softened, and his calloused hand gently stroked your cheek, then brushed your hair with his fingers.

-I promise to protect you with everything I've got, even if that means I have to sacrifice myself.-he muttered to himself, placing a peck on your forehead.

bonten!Mikey↷

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sitting on his chair in the gloomy office, lit only by a fucking hanging light that barely even illuminated anything, he was contemplating his life choices

his peaceful thought process was ceased by sanzu, who was carrying you in his arms bridal style, barging inside the office

"boss, someone attacked y/n. i managed to save them before it's too late."

mikey abruptly got out of the chair and rushed to you, pushing sanzu away and holding you close to him

asks you over and over again how you're feeling, his voice shaky and his eyes wide

he'd immediately place you on his lap on the chair and order the members to try and find them

you'd spend the rest of the evening snuggled on his lap, and he won't let you go

always, a l w a y s sends someone by your side when you go outside

he wants these bastards' blood to seep into the carpets, floors and even curtains of his office

he'd fucking torture them in his own office, savouring every single moment and even recording their screams to play on an mp3 or sth

most of the time, he'd coax you into spending the entire day with him and not go outside, especially when there aren't any Bonten members available to accompany you

he'd definitely try and teach you self defense, though

he'd also contemplate breaking up with you for the sake of your own health, because he KNOWS this will happen again in the future, and you might even end up dead

in the end he can't let go of you and decides to fight until the end

might take a whole week off just to stay in his apartment with you, eating the meals you prepare him and talking with you on the balcony

Chilly breeze sent shivers down your body. The night was young, the bustling streets of the city and the neon lights of the nearby clubs illuminated your faces with different colors. Mikey's gaze was fixated on you, or more precisely - your face. There were still quite a decent amount of scars and bruises on it, making his heart shatter.

You were snapped out of your thoughts when Mikey placed his hand on your lower back, the other one gently massaging your arm, pulling you in for a kiss. Without overthinking it, you returned the kiss, your arms gently placed on his shoulders.

-Nothing is ever going to separate us, my love. No matter how many of them attack, I will always be your shield.

Izana↷

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boy oh boy

izana is usually always with you, no matter where you go. he'd either glue himself to you or not see you all day

anyways on one particular evening while going to the convenience store, you were cornered and ganged on by a group of hoodlums who seemed to have not so good intentions with you

thankfully, you always told izana where you went, since danger lurks everywhere, especially because you're stuck with him

since you were not replying to his messages for too long, he wasted no second and rushed to the said store

you were hugging yourself as various other people were around you, trying to calm you down. he pushed them all away and started interrogating you (affectionately)

izana is posessive, and he will always keep you under his surveillance and won't let you go anywhere without him

if you manage to give him clear explanation who the dudes were, he'd visit their homes and beat them up with their parents one by one

takes you everywhere with him, including meetings with Tenjiku, fights, or simple hang outs

treats you like a royalty though - buys you new clothes, buys you food and etc.

a very good listener. can listen to you ramble about random stuff all day and does so, if it means it will make you feel better

treats your wounds himself, he has some decent knowledge in this aspect, at least

often takes you on rooftop dates

he basically forces you to live with him, but it's okay because he's spoiling you and you never lift a finger <3

writes songs about you and plays them on his guitar (he can't sing that well but he tries and you like it).

buys new fish for his tank and names them after both of you

Watching the fish in the tank, you were deep in thought as the two fishes Izana got for both of you move alongside each other, as if they're fallen deeply into the hazy clouds of love.

A sudden melody shot you awake from the daydream, whipping your head to see your boyfriend sitting on the couch playing his guitar, gesturing you to sit next to him. You do so and embark yourself into the melody he's performing, swaying your body left and right.

-I will never let this happen to you, again.-his voice echoed through the room as he strummed his final note.

bonten!Sanzu↷

being the fucking ass he is, he got "high" once again and accidentally got lost

actually, you lost him

you began searching every nook and alleyway, until a group of people recognized you and began ganging up on you

luckily, sanzu was near and heard your screams, and even in his drugged state, he launched himself at them and first beat them up, then blowed their brains out in front of you

you were covered in blood, and the fucker just whistled and began carrying you bridal style to your shared home

behind the walls of your own room he breaks down and starts searching your body for any bruises, cuts or wounds. Frantically asks you questions and holds you close to him

will not let you leave your shared home until he feels like it is safe

he's paranoid as hell and oftentimes expects someone to barge inside your home and hurt you again, so he's gonna patrol the home like a guard dog

always makes excuses to go with you in places. "Uh, I ah- I need a new shampoo!" "Oh, I just wanted to choose the tomatoes today!" and shit he usually would never do

Watches you in your sleep, deffo

when he prepares for work, he always leaves a small note with "take care" written on it

asks mikey to let him clock out sooner until his paranoia fades away

takes you on night rides, but the fucker has a terrible driving tactic and always makes stupid mistakes (not serious but enough to make your stomach drop)

Parking his car in a random empty parking lot, Sanzu caressed your thigh gently, fiddling with the hem of your shorts, drawing circles on your thighs, or even slightly tickling you.

Sanzu looked into your eyes like you were a renaissance painting, completely mesmerized by how perfectly the car lights illuminated your features and how immaculately your hair fell in front of your face, so much so he wasn't capable of resisting the urge to kiss and touch you on the spot.

-I will never let anyone tarnish my angel again.-Sanzu's voice was low and sensual, as his hands traversed your neck and collarbone.

South↷

you had a fight with him and stormed off your shared apartment, tears urging to escape your eyes

you knew it was risky, but fights with south are always ugly and tormenting, so you decided i'd be best for you to calm yourself down before facing him again

you visited your favourite spot where you frist met him, but unbeknowst to you - there was a surprise waiting there

south couldn't sit straight, especially after letting you go out alone in this late hour

he knew you always visited this particular place when you were upset, and thank god he arrived there on time

the last thing you remembered is him throwing the dudes into a tree and swinging them around like they were some potato sacks

you woke up in your shared apartment yet again, with south's back facing you

the hospital was far away, and he tried to take care of you alone

thankfully you weren't hurt too bad

from that day on, south kept his mouth shut more often, not daring to say anything that might upset you even the slightest and cause you to storm off the apartment alone yet again

he seemed more affectionate than usual, always carrying you around the house like royalty and insisting on doing all the chores instead

makes you bubble baths and does your hair care/body care routine for you

sings for you (it's canon he's the no 1 best singer), especially your favorite songs while he dances with you around the apartment

submerges you in gifts as an apology for causing you to get beaten up

he's feels extremely guilty, but he's not good with words, so you're stuck with him gift-giving you

Laying under the huge pile of toys South had bought for you to cuddle when he isn't around, inhaling the scent of one of his T-shirts that you were wearing - the anticipation of your lover to come back home and hold you was growing stronger and stronger.

The sun rays illuminating the room and hitting your body overwhelmed you, and you felt yourself slowly drifting into slumber, cuddling a pink bear that held a heart with South's name sewn onto it.

-Where darkness first beckoned me.-South's voice was deep and gentle, singing the lyrics of one of your favorite songs while gently brushing your hair.

the song he sang is ''into the void'' by twin tribes, chosen because it is one of my favorites

©chao-thicc-hcs; reblogs are deeply appreciated.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

I'd like to request a ShinyHunter!Reader giving their epilogue friends Pokemon they caught during their adventure (can be traded or gifted), with handwritten notes carefully taped inside their Pokeballs kinda explaining the meaning behind them:

Carmine - Authentic Polteageist

"I came to Kitakami as a stranger but left as your friend. It's my hope that this Pokemon and your beloved Sinistcha can be good buddies just as we are now."

--

Kieran - Roaring Moon / Iron Valiant

"I wanted to give you something that's just as rare, powerful, and wonderful as you are. Just as you found yourself through the darkness during the excursion in Area Zero, so too did I find this Pokemon."

--

Arven - Arcanine

"I wanted you and Mabosstiff to have a loyal, strong companion by your side, someone who will be by your side no matter what happens in life."

--

Nemona - Whatever the reader's starter was

"I wanted you to carry a piece of me in your party, since you've been the first friend to support and encourage me on my adventure."

--

Penny - Either Espeon or Glaceon

"I know you love a certain type of Pokemon, and I hoped this one would find belonging with your team - just like you've found it with me, Team Star, and the others."

Ik we can't trade shinies but damn it if gamefreak won't let us,,,we writers WILL make it happen

........

Carmine

One of the first things she learned about you during your trip to Kitakami was your obsession with shiny-hunting. You've done it all your life, with your first ever starter pokemon being a shiny, too!

You literally spend hours at a time running around different places, looking for Pokémon that either have a darker/lighter hue to their colors or looked incredibly different.

Tbh wonders if this is some Paldea craze bc no way could she see herself wasting so much time...

Despite that, your team of shiny 'mons had great stats and kicked her team down pretty good.

For a while she thought you were being the biggest show-off.

But after everything that happened with Ogerpon, the Loyal Three, BB Academy, Kieran, Terapagos, Pecharunt, etc..Carmine becomes one of your closest friends, learning to accept and support your passions for shiny hunting.

When she decides to trade you a Poltchageist, you surprise her by trading back a Shiny Polteageist with the authentic stamp, having found it by sheer luck.

Inside its pokeball, she discovers a note carefully taped within, and you assure her she can read it in front of you.

"To Carmine: I arrived to Kitakami as a stranger, but left as your friend, and I'm glad our bond has grown stronger. It's my hope that this Authentic Polteageist and your Sinistcha can become good buddies just like we have -[Y/n]"

She was so close to tearing up until she reads the word "authentic" and wonders how tf you managed to find such a specific Pokémon (especially a shiny authentic Polteageist).

"Well I had to set up a camp near Alfornada and then-" You almost start infodumping your hunting strategies, but she stops you with a hug instead.

"I promise they'll become the best of friends, and if not....then I'll...I'll make them be friends!" She huffs, while you just smile and hug her back, glad she appreciated the note.

Kieran

In Kitakami, he was always fascinated by your team of shinies, and at dinner he gawked when you brought up tales of your harrowing adventures in trying to find them.

For instance, you nearly got beaten up by some Mankeys before finding a Shiny Primeape somewhere nearby--but talked about it so casually. Like it was just another normal day for you.

You're not only strong, but very brave too..and he admires those traits.

Although when you two meet again at BB, it's just more fuel added to his jealousy of you. And he even comments about whether you wasted more time shiny hunting or training.

In the underdepths, you found a Shiny Carbink, and he tries catching it first---only for it to break out of the pokeball, and he scowls when you capture it without much trouble.

But after reconciling with each other and resolving the whole mess with Pecharunt, Kieran decides to trade you an Applin (after hyping himself up to ask you ofc).

You considered trading him one as well...

But you thought of something even better that also held special meaning:

A Shiny Paradox Pokémon you found when you returned to Area Zero to capture the alpha 'raidon.

More specifically, it was [Roaring Moon/Iron Valiant], and he was absolutely stunned when the creature pops out and greets him, unable to believe his eyes.

"W-Wowzers, you're actually gonna let me have one of.....huh?" It presents him with a note, handwritten by you.

"To Kieran: I wanted to give you something that's just as rare, powerful, and wonderful as you are. Just like how you've found yourself through the darkness back in Area Zero, I too found this Paradox Pokémon waiting for me. May it be your guiding light to future victories -[Y/N]"

He doesn't realize he's crying at your touching message until he sees several teardrops staining the paper.

How did he get so lucky to have such a caring and forgiving person like you in his life?

Arven

He knew about your shiny hunting hobby, although at times he thinks you're nuts for willing to risk life and limb for a slightly differently colored Pokémon.

You have notes about how you found a Shiny Garganacl, Copperajah, Gabite, Houndstone, and even an Iron Bundle--all down in Area Zero.

You explain that sparkling sandwich recipes make them show up more often, and he tries it out and is stunned when he finds a Shiny later on.

Ofc you take a little pride in teaching him something new.

When he visits the League Club and decides to trade Pokémon with you, it wasn't that hard to figure out what to give him.

He's stunned when it's a Shiny Arcanine with a note taped within the pokeball, addressed to him.

"To Arven: I've helped you and Mabosstiff before, and I will do so again. So here's a Pokémon who will be forever loyal to you both. No matter what curveballs life may throw at you, Arcanine will never leave your side -[Y/N] (PS: I've been calling this one Mustard, but you can give it a new name if you wish).

He laughs a little at the end of the message, as it brought a huge smile to his face.

"Not a bad name, buddy! Thank you..truly. I think Mustard and Mabosstiff will get along just fine."

Nemona

She'll thrilled you've found your calling as a shiny hunter during your Pokemon journey, but always reminded you not to forget about being her "rival for life", too.

When all is said and done, you invited her to the clubroom at the BB Academy with an idea.

Since she was the first person in Paldea to give you the encouragement to start your Pokémon journey, you wanted to give her something extra special to show your thanks.

Although first you had to pull her away from Kieran (who was startled by her demand for a battle) and distract her by proposing a trade.

Turns out she planned to do that exact same thing when she arrived....but got caught up in meeting a fellow champion and totally forgot in her excitement.

Anyways, you finally did a trade and Nemona's amazed when you give her a shiny version of your starter Pokémon (meanwhile, your fully-leveled starter ace is standing beside you, looking proud).

She's so hyped to rush outside and train it that she doesn't even see the note you left in the pokeball until the shiny gives it to her.

"Huh?? Oh! How could I have missed this??" She gasps dramatically before sitting down to read it over.

"To Nemona: You've always supported and encouraged me since the start of my Pokémon journey, and I couldn't be more grateful. So as my first friend and rival here in Paldea, I wanted you to carry a piece of me in your party. May you both grow stronger together -[Y/N]"

Her heart is just full as she reads the sweet note, before jumping up to crush you in a hug.

This really meant a lot to her--more than you ever know considering you've been her #1 source of encouragement, too.

Penny

Tackling all the Team Star bases definitely gave you an excuse to do some shiny hunting on the side, and you soon come across an Eevee.

It had a lonely/timid nature when you caught it, feeling like a misfit despite being in your party of shinies.

You weren't sure which form to evolve it into, as it didn't seem interested in any stone or in becoming your friend.

After helping Team Star and Penny redeem themselves and resolve the mess with Pecharunt, you have a small chat in her dorm room about Shiny Eeveelutions--to which she remarks her attempts to collect them, yet is having terrible luck so far.

She's well aware that Flareon, Glaceon, and Leafeon shinies look painfully similar to their counterparts (having slightly different hues) and expresses her frustration in the fact she could have seen one but didn't realize...

Later, you find Shiny Eevee digging through your bag, and you wonder why until it pulls out an ice stone.....and it finally occurs to you that it heard your conversation with Penny.

Seems like it finally made its choice.

So when you invite her to the League Club, you trade her a Shiny Glaceon, to which she just gawks like "are you fr???? I can have this one????"

Then she sees the note meticulously taped inside and reads it to herself.

"To Penny: I know how much you love a certain type of Pokémon. So I entrust you with this Glaceon, a true Shiny. I hope it finds belonging in your team, just like you've found it in me, Team Star, and all the others -[Y/n]."

She can't help the smile growing on her face, taking off her glasses to wipe at her eyes, all while Shiny Glaceon smiles and comforts her--proving that it's ready to be her new companion.

[leathfaic]

Soap and Ghost have been a thing for a while, spending their leaves together whenever possible, holed up at Soap's place for the most part, only ever in Manchester when Ghost wants to visit his families graves and they don't want to drive back up that day.

When the call comes that there's been damage to his flat Soap has to leave alone, Simon is out on one of the solo missions they love to send him on. So all Johnny can really do is leave a scribbled note on his bed that he's home sorting trouble with the flat.

A few days later Ghost returns, a bit miffed when he doesn't find Johnny waiting for him on the tarmac or in his barracks. Price brings him up to speed though and the letter explains the rest.

Soap is surprised when he opens the door to Simon in his civilian clothes, hadn't even gotten a text saying he's back, "What are ye doing here ye bampot? Dinnae get ma note that the whole flat is a mouldy mess?"

"Though' you'd appreciate some help." Simon just shrugs looking a little forlorn on the doorstep, suddenly not sure if showing up uninvited was the right move.

Soap grabs his man and pulls him into the flat before the huge fucker can decide to bugger off with his feelings all hurt.

"Ah'd love yer help, juist didnae expect ye to want to spend yer time in ma mouldy paradise after juist returning from a mission. Dinnae exactly haeve amenities exactly, yeah?"

He really doesn't. The flat is a fucking disaster, the one above had a pipe burst while the inhabitants were on vacation, water leaking unchecked for days, it's a bloody miracle that the building is still statically sound. But all the moisture seeped in to the flat below. And when anyone thought of informing him for possible damages it was too late. There's barely a room left untouched. Soap's been sleeping in a nearby hotel, going through his belongings saving what can be saved before calling in professionals to clean out the mold.

There's no way he'll give up the flat, they both know that, it was his grandmother's before, getting passed on to him when she moved to a retirement home. It's where Johnny grew up, his nan taking him in when his parents gave up on him.

So Ghost helps Soap sort out the mess, save what they can save, which luckily includes a lot of priced memories, but they know that pretty much all furniture is a loss. Floors, walls and ceilings will have to be redone too. Be that as it may they spend the rest of the day to also takeling care of the other reasons Soap can't just let a crew of cleaners walk in too. All traces of him being anything but a normal soldier carefully erased, packed up, hidden.

When they crash at the hotel late at night Johnny is still restless, the way he gets when some bug mission is about to start.

"Didn't know furniture shopping for your fla' would get you tha' riled up, sweetheart."

It's meant as harmless teasing, of making Johnny focus his energy on him and getting it out.

Instead the other man seems to dial it up, is not just squirming but also biting his lips now.

Fuck, he hasn't seen him like that unless whatever is about to go off is deadly serious.

So when Soap turns to him Simon stills, waits for the catastrophe that clearly is about to happen. For everything to come crumbling down around them, because that's how his life tends to go.

Instead, with the smallest voice he's ever heard on the man, Johnny makes his world fall into place like it never has before.

"What if we were nae getting stuff for ma place but rather, ye ken our place?

Our place.

It's rare that anything manages to make Ghost freeze anymore. But this? This does it.

He only shakes himself out of it when he sees panic and regret well up in Soap's eyes, can't have that after all. Mouth still not willing to obey his command he drags the other man into a crushing embrace, burying his face in the shower-damn mohawk.

"I think I'd like tha'." he mumbles eventually, his voice all weird and off, gruff from fighting the all the emotion but soft from the love that punches itself clean through all his defenses.

In his arms Soap drains of all tension. Mission accomplished no reason to be nervous now.

He falls asleep in Simons arms like that, deep breaths softly caressing his chest.

Ghost lies awake, his heart pounding a steady rhythm of excitement now.

He's going to go shopping with Soap tomorrow.

For their place. For their home.

Wild joy mixes with perfidious apprehension, parts of his brain refusing that this will really happen, convinced that Soap will wake up, having thought better of it.

That home is a concept lost to him. He is the Ghost for a reason after all.

He doesn't get a wink of sleep. His mocking of Soaps nerves ringing hollow in his ears.

Instead he braces himself, ready to meet the rejection head on, not let it show on his face, makes himself cold as ice.

"Ye look like we're heading to war not to keek at stuff for our home, love."

The armor of ice built meticulously over sleepless hours melts all at once.

"You really sure you want to share a 'ome with me Johnny?"

"Yeah Simon Riley, ye big daftie, think Ah'd nearly piss ma pants and ask ye, just to pull a fast one?"

For the second time in as many days Ghost shrugs helplessly, no defense of his a match for the things Soap makes him feel.

The man knows him too bloody well too, drags him out of the hotel room and gets them going. Let's actions speak over words. A language that works far better for Simon.

Who finds himself in store after store full of furniture, wallpapers and stuff where he comes to find that maybe he is not equipped to handle this.

Part 2

[alittlefanatic]

hello! would it be alright to request something for a reader who really looks up to howdt as a sort of father figure?

idk man, i collect fictional parental figures like pokemon, welcome home happens to be my latest obsession, and YOU happen to be my favorite fan writer for said obsession, so i figured id ask- no pressure though! college is rough, and i want you to take care of yourself!

I'm going to cry qwq THANK YOU SO MUCH! That means the world to me that I'm your favorite! I never thought that I'd be someone's favorite writer awawawaw.

🐛 Howdy Father Figure Headcanons! 🐛

Child Version

🐛 Howdy LOVES to hold you and pick you up! You are just so tiny and small!

🐛 He would love to give you head pats and even ruffle your hair! (If you are ok with it of course)

🐛 Got a boo boo? He will be right there by your side like a frantic parent! "Are you hurt? I have cute little butterfly bandages! Let's get you cleaned up!"

🐛 He will hang all of your crayon drawings throughout his Bugdega! He wants to show off how creative and how proud he is of you!

🐛 If you knock over a stand at his Bugdega: "It's alright bug! Are you hurt? No? Ok good.. mistakes happen, don't be upset! What do we do when we make a mistake? We clean it up! See? It's better! Mistakes make us feel bad but they don't define us!"

Teenage Version

🐛 He would have you work in his store! "It helps build character and understand responsibility better!"

🐛 With that being said though, he also helps you define your boundaries!

🐛 "You don't want to work on Saturdays and Sundays? Do you need the day off to rest and work on things? That's ok! Thank you for telling me! Let's work things out if we need to~"

🐛 If you are wanting to sell anything, he will help you put up a little stand in his store! He's your biggest supporter and will personally send out your work to other neighbors to get them interested to buy!

🐛 This man has absolutely no idea how to drive a car (mainly because he cannot fit in many, nonetheless drive) but he will try and guide you nonetheless! That is until he gets one of the other neighbors to help. He would get you a little 'beetle' car purely for the name.

Adult Version

🐛 He would absolutely cry at the thought of you moving out but he would help you 'spread your wings' if you did want to move, or at least have a place of your own nearby!

🐛 "My little bug is all grown up! I can't believe how fast it flew by...I'm so proud of you! Know you can always come back to your ol' pops ok? I may be getting older but I still have all these arms to hug you!"

🐛 He would let you take over the Bugdega if you wanted it! He would feel like you would do a phenomenal job.

🐛 If you don't though, he will be your number one supporter and will send you baked goods in the morning for your work as a courtesy gift!

🐛 If you move away, he would send you letters every week updating you about what's going on in the neighborhood and how he misses you and loves you, and that he's proud of you every day!

🐛 He is a very sentimental man, keeping every letter you write to him, or anything you've ever given him. Don't you ever think it wasn't appreciated, because he has a little area in his room dedicated to things from you.

I felt so bad that I haven't been able to write, I got a few more personal things to do then I'm completely free so expect more soon I promise! I'm so happy to finally be able to write more content for this fandom soon it brings me joy Be sure to get some water and a snack neighbor! Howdy would like you to take care of yourself 🐛

[larissa-the-scribe]

Terrarium Lights

Part 1 of 3 for @inklings-challenge

An older lady befriends and adopts a ghost she found in her garden

Next part >>here

Michael Goffrey bid his wife farewell as he left for his next shipping job, and Gail Goffrey was once again faced with the fact that her house was cavernously empty.

She had expected the house to feel empty after her children grew up and moved on with their lives; that was the sort of thing one always heard about from the mothers and wives left behind. However, everyone seemed to stress the loneliness—not the rather more intense boredom.

Gail had always preferred quiet and alone time, so she did not take issue with the solitude. However, though she still had to cook and mend and clean and tidy and all the other tasks, it was one thing to do so for six people and quite another, shorter thing to do so for two. It was even less of a thing to do so for one, since Michael had been promoted to first mate and now had to accompany the airships personally, no longer simply loading and unloading at the cloudends as he once did.

Empty and meaningless. That’s what it felt like. With her family, she had people to help and care for. With just herself, she felt as though she were wasting time walking in circles for no other purpose than to exist.

She made it to the second day without any significant issue.

She was out tending to the herb garden when it happened—a bug wandered in front of her. That shouldn’t have been a problem. Bugs were some of her favorite creatures. But after the first smile, it hit her that she hadn't seen a new kind of one in months—this one already had three sketches in her notebook.

She’d run out of garden bugs to document.

Bugs, of all things. Bugs were everywhere, bugs had never-ending variations, bugs were constant. And she’d run out of them.

Stabbing the trowel into the earth perilously close to the offending bug, she sat back on her heels and looked up at the sky.

"Well, Lord, I reckon you put me on your good Earth for a reason. And I don't think it was just to sketch bugs." She smoothed her apron out, flicking bits of dirt off of it. "I also doubt I'm done with what I'm supposed to do down here, otherwise I wouldn't be here. But if you don't mind me saying, I'm awfully bored of where I am, though I do love my house and my husband and my town quite fierce. But I have all the time in the world, and I'd like to do good with it, if I could. So if you could show me what to do where I can—give me eyes to see as who I can do good towards—then I would appreciate it mightily."

Gail had prayed similar prayers before, with varying regularity. She knew the good Lord had heard her, as he always did. And if he answered with more solitude and time and boredom, then she supposed that was where she was meant to be for the moment. But she dearly hoped there might be something new this time.

So, really, she shouldn't have been surprised to see someone under the loquat tree. But then again, it had been raining since before dawn, so no one in their right mind would have been outdoors. She should know, since she herself had been out gathering moss for terrariums and hadn't heard a breath from anyone all day, even near the city.

Her first impression was that the lad was quite young. Younger than her youngest, in fact, who had not too long ago started her career as a professor at the nearby university. Looked perhaps like he could be one of her students. Very slight of build, as though he needed to eat more, and small looking as he sat hunched in the rain and letting the wet drip down his messy hair, full of loose ends that had gotten free from his ponytail.

Gail stood at the edge of her garden for a moment, resting her pail of moss against the stone border as she observed him.

He didn't move, just sat there with his face turned towards the soil, and didn't seem to see her. Part of his shoulder seemed stained, perhaps with mud. With the house not a few feet to the left, she wondered if he'd tried to knock and not gotten an answer, what with her out and about.

Well, unexpected or not, there was really only one thing to do.

Gripping her pail handle resolutely, Gail marched her way through the garden paths and stood in front of him. He shifted at the sound of her approach, turning his face up towards her—his eyes were pale, as if someone had sketched them on and not bothered with paint. What's more, up closer, the brownish stain on his shoulder looked rather like dried blood.

He tilted his head, as if trying to tell where the sound had come from.

"Well then," she said after a long moment of trying to figure out what to say, "who might you be?"

"Oh." He looked more directly at her, and somehow the eyes looked a bit more colored in, like they remembered they could be brown. "Dreadfully sorry, ma'am. I seem to have gotten lost in the rain. I hope you don't mind me taking a few moments here under your tree?"

He hadn't answered the question, but he seemed more surprised than shifty. "Not at all. Unpleasant weather to be lost in, for sure. If you'd like, you can wait it out under a roof."

"Oh," he said again, and looked to his left; this time it seemed like he understood what he was seeing. "I suppose that would be nicer."

"Well, you're welcome to my roof, if you’d like," she said. She wondered how long he would take her up on that.

He awkwardly stumbled to his feet before she could offer her hand. "That's very kind of you, ma'am."

"Would you like anything to eat?" She went ahead and led the way to the kitchen door.

He hummed thoughtfully. "Thank you ma’am, but I don't think I'm hungry."

She didn't think he would be, but, well, it wasn't like she had experience with this. Which concerned her—she had no idea what she was supposed to be doing. At least he didn't seem to be wicked. She supposed he must need a helping hand and, while she needed to figure out what that help was, he was still just a boy; she would do him the courtesy of treating him accordingly.

The porch and floors, old and creaky since long before she and her husband and infant son had moved in decades ago, greeted them with typical fanfare as they trudged over the threshold. She dripped her way over to the stove, where she put the kettle on; it was unlikely that her visitor would want any, but she most certainly did. Setting her pail of moss by the stove to deal with later, she glanced back to see the lad standing in the middle of the space, staring up at the roof.

Gail wondered if he noticed that he wasn't wet.

"Say," she said, carefully pulling teacups out of the cupboard, "what did you say your name was?"

He looked at her sharply. "I… I don't think I did."

"Hmmmm. Well, how should I call you, then?"

He stared at her.

In the background, the rain continued on.

"Should I just call you ma'am, then?" He said, smiling faintly.

Gail squinted at him. "Now then, young man, are you dodging the question deliberately, or do you just not have an answer?"

"Oh." He glanced around the kitchen, then back to her, and blanked. "Sorry, what was the question?"

Gail rested back against the counter. She picked up her glasses from where she'd left them this morning, and stuck them on, pushing the temples through her sodden mess of hair. "I was just asking what your name was."

His eyes widened. "I… don't… Didn't I answer that?"

"Not as I can recall."

"That… that was rude of me, then, wasn't it?" His eyes were still wide, and the brown was fading.

Maybe it was rude of her to keep pressing the matter. He seemed not to know. Gail pressed her glasses firmer on her nose, trying to reach some kind of decision—but whatever was going on with her guest had been set in motion.

"What is my name?" He asked, his voice rising. "I can't remember my name."

"That's alright, dear," she said, trying to distract him, calm him down. "Do you remember where you were before my garden?"

It had the opposite effect.

He stepped back, towards the door, and glanced around with eyes that no longer understood where he was. "No… I-I can't remember… where am I? Do you know my name?"

"I'm afraid I—"

The kettle shrieked into the space between them with a rush of steam.

The lad cast a wild glance in its direction, stepped backwards. Gail, startled into motion, scrambled to shut the thing off.

When she turned back, the space where he had stood was dry and empty. She and the rain and her pail of terrarium moss had been left alone again.

[axewchao]

Sharp Yellow Eyes

A redraw of something I made back in January of 2020 and never posted. I've been switching back and forth between the old and new version in tabs and GOD it's so satisfying to see… =w=

Nothing quite like waking up in the void and seeing this standing before you, am I right? :'D …noseriouslyyouneedtorun—

The old version came with a story that I still really like, so the new one gets it too!

"I can't believe it... It's really you-!!"

Dalex could only stare in confusion at the figure standing before him. For a moment, he thought it was Ludwig, but the tone of the younger Koopa's voice made it very clear it was not.

The figure let out a faint giggle, like a fan meeting their idol for the first time. Dalex was used to that sound; he'd heard it plenty of times when someone approached any of the Koopalings and he happened to be nearby. However, hearing it this time sent a chill down his spine, and he wasn't sure why.

As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, Dalex began noticing other things. Things that he always associated with Ludwig, but seemed... wrong on this Koopa. His hair was big and spread out away from his head, but looked unkepmt, like he hadn't bothered to tend to it for days or even weeks on end. The toothy grin was the same, but showed more fangs. It reminded Dalex of his friend Makani, only this guy didn't have braces. His tail was crooked, like Ludwig's, but was bent the other direction, pointing up instead of down. Like it'd been broken and just left alone.

Last but not least were his eyes.

They were the same golden eyes Dalex knew, but instead of being round, warm, and welcoming, they were sharp, cold slits. They were glowing as they locked on to him, and for a moment, Dalex felt like he couldn't look away. Not because he liked them, mind. Rather, it felt as though looking away would lead to something bad. He didn't want to find out what that "something" was.

"You're here! You're actually here-!! A real live Poison Koopa, right in front of me!!" The figure giggled again, and took a step closer. By instinct, Dalex took a step back. He did not want this Ludwig-lookalike getting near him at all. "And here I thought I'd never get to meet one, let alone you..."

"Uhh..." Dalex was at a loss for words. Sure, he knew Poison Koopas were hard to find, but... Nevermind. He needed answers. "Who are you? And where am I?"

"Let's just say I'm... a friend of a friend." The other Koopa waved it off, not even blinking. "And where we are is not important, neither is how you got here. What matters is that you're here, and we can finally talk about you, Dalex."

Dalex's tail stiffened. "How... How do you know my name?"

"I hear things through the grapevine, that's all~" The Koopa chuckled, his grin somehow getting wider. "But you don't have to worry about that; your name is all I know about you." He stepped closer. Again. "Though I will admit, I am curious to know more. Is it true that your venom takes a mere ten minutes to kill someone?"

"What-??" What kind of question is that-?!

"Or maybe it takes longer? You clearly have Boom Boom genes... Perhaps being a hybrid has weakened it somewhat? That's been my main hypothesis; hybrids always have a detriment to counter a benefit. But who else would know the truth other than the man himself? Hmm??" The Koopa placed a hand on his chin as he stepped even closer. Dalex took three steps back. "Tell me."

Dalex held up his hands. "Back up. Why is my venom so important to you-??"

"Is it not obvious? I want it."

Dalex fell silent once more. After a few minutes- which felt like an eternity- he cleared his throat. "...Excuse me?"

"Your venom, Dalex. I want it." The blue-haired Koopa's eyes grew even more intense, if that was even possible. He visibly shivered, "Just thinking about it is so exciting... The perfect weapon, and it's right in front of me...! I know how kind you are, Dalex. So if you'd be a dear and donate some of of that lovely venom to me, I'd greatly appreciate it~!"

Dalex shifted, legs tensing as he mentally readied himself to run. "I'm gonna say no to that. It's mine. And with that-!" Without giving the downright creepy Koopa a chance to respond, he took off. He had no idea where he was going, or how he was going to get home, but anywhere was better than spending one more second with that guy. Whoever he was.

The figure blinked, then chuckled, that toothy grin never falling. "We'll see about that, Dalex. After all... Kooky Von Koopa always gets what he wants. One way, or another..."

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

Only the Strong Survive Ch. 4

Series Summary: Lexie Weston is in a terrible, abusive marriage. In her mind and soul, she feels like she has no way out that won't result in her death. But something changes in her life to make her take the risk. Can she rely on Sheriff Beau Arlen to protect her like he said he would, or will this risk lead to ruin?

Pairings: Beau Arlen x Y/N (eventual)

Series Warnings/Explicit 18+: Smut, Angst, Fluff throughout. A pretty slow burn, TW: Abusive marriage, Domestic abuse will be talked about throughout. Chapter warnings will be more specific

Word Count: 3,027

Chapter Summary: Beau comes to visit Lexi with some tough news, and a gift.

Chapter Warnings: TW: Domestic abuse mentioned, fear and anxiety due to abuse talked about throughout the chapter. Angst, sadness. Discussion of pregnancy, fetuses, and newborns. Bit of pining happening. Also Beau being the best and sweetest. That's definitely a warning!

A/N: So this will be my first Beau series. I already have 8,000 series on the go, so I thought, of course, that I had to make 8001. 😄 But this idea's been sitting in my head for a while so here it is. 😁 I hope you enjoy it. Please let me know if you do. Feedback is EVERYTHING to a writer, and I'd sure love to read what you thought.

Hope you enjoy Ch. 4!

The beautiful divider at the bottom was created by @firefly-graphics

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Beau walked through the glass doors into the quiet lounge area of Haven House. It was made to look a little like a doctor’s office, which is what they would tell anyone who came through the doors and asked. From the outside the general public only saw a nondescript building hidden behind a large yard of trees, and if they happened to venture inside, they were told it was a private doctor’s clinic, and that they weren’t taking patients.

But Beau knew different, of course. Law enforcement across the county knew about Haven House, and had made use of its services on more than one occasion.

He approached the desk that was situated behind what he knew to be bullet-proof glass. He knew because he’d helped them install it earlier that year. The state’s budget for Haven House wasn’t lavish, and he knew Sarah stretched those few dollars as far as she could, spending the vast majority of it on the well-being of the women and children who were being housed there. Most of the staff were volunteers, and the offices and staff areas were pretty shabby and in bad need of repair. 

So a few months ago, he’d taken a week of evenings to do what he could in fixing it up. He’d insisted that they switch out the old plexiglass window for a bullet-proof version, considering the kind of violent person that could come strolling through. The security in the residence was wonderful, but as usual the staff areas weren’t as well cared for, so Beau had done what he could to change that.

As he approached the window, he smiled at Pat, the elderly lady who ran the administrative side of things at Haven House. She ran a tight ship, and she never cut corners in her diligence to safety, which he appreciated. But she also never cracked a smile or allowed any softness to show in her sternly-lined face.  That is, until a little one was nearby, then her shell cracked and warmth oozed out of her.

She absolutely adored children. And children adored her back.  She was notorious for her ability to soothe a crying baby - even teething babies, even collicky babies! According to the mothers who stayed at Haven House, Pat was simply a wizard, and if she frightened them slightly with her gruffness, they forgave all when she took their screaming babies out of their exhausted arms, and shooed them off to nap.

He smiled at her now, even though he knew she wouldn’t reciprocate, which she didn’t. “Good afternoon, Ms. Patricia. How are you this fine day?”

Pat shrugged.  “Knees hurt.” She answered succinctly.  “Assume you’re here to see 1511?” 

Pat never referred to the women or children by their names, just by their file numbers. It was for safety and anonymity.  

Beau nodded.  “Yes, ma’am.”

Pat silently passed him the log book, so he could sign in and then buzzed him through to the residence. He gave her a little salute in thanks, to which she merely grunted, making him smile.

He walked down the long hallway, twisting and turning around corners, well-versed in how to get around after his many visits - both before and after Lexi came to stay.

When Lexi had first come to Haven House, he’d been to see her everyday for a week straight, mostly because of the interviews and questioning that had to be done. But he’d purposely stretched the interviews out over the week. He’d wanted to conduct short interviews that wouldn’t take too much out of her each day, but also he wanted to reassure her that he hadn’t merely dumped her here and then promptly forgotten about her. He wanted her to know that he still cared about keeping her safe.

But after that first week, he’d slowed down his visits, only stopping in once, maybe twice a week, just to check in. Partly, he hadn’t wanted to monopolize her time as she was adjusting to her new, temporary home…but there were other reasons as well.  

Now it had been over two weeks since he’d seen her last, and almost a month and a half since he’d come to take her away from the nightmare she’d been living.  

He wished he was coming back to see her with better news.

He entered the day room and only Lexi was there.  She sat, reading by the window. Well actually, he realized, she was just quietly staring out the window, holding a book. As he walked closer, she heard him approach and startled, dropping her book onto the ground. 

Slightly embarrassed by her response, she blushed a little as she smiled up at him.  “Sheriff! Sorry, you caught me daydreaming.”

Beau shook his head.  “Please, it’s Beau, remember? And I’m sorry, I should have made more noise as I came in.”

Lexi smiled and shook her head as she stood up, bending to retrieve her book. She set it on the window sill and  went to pour herself a cup of coffee from the long table that held the machine, and rows of chipped porcelain cups, along with powdered milk and sugar. She nodded towards the pot of coffee. 

“Want a cup?”

Beau nodded. “Sure, that’d be great. Just one sugar, please.”

They were quiet as she poured out two cups, and prepared them. Then they moved to sit on one of the worn and slightly frayed blue velour couches.  

Beau took a sip of his coffee and licked his lips.  “How have you been, Lexi?”

She smiled and looked down at her lap, as she answered. “I’ve been okay. Adjusting, you know.  Takes some time.”

She looked up at him and he was happy to see there was excitement in her expression. “My counselor here, her name is Michelle, she’s been really helpful. She’s signed me up for the GED program they run out of here. There are classrooms and everything, so they’re gonna help me to get my diploma.  Or well, the equivalent, I guess.”

She shrugged and looked down at her lap again, subdued, and Beau felt his heart squeeze. He’d noticed that this was something she did often. Anytime she was even a little excited about something, she seemed apologetic afterwards, as though her emotions and happiness were something to be sorry for, something that was annoying. 

He hated that she felt that way. So, he smiled widely and put as much enthusiasm as possible into his voice when he responded.  “Hey, that’s fantastic, Lexi. No way someone as bright as you should be without their diploma. You’re gonna do great.”

He could see two bright spots of pink appear on the apples of her cheeks and it made him smile even brighter. Then he remembered why he was there, and the smile faltered. 

Deciding to put it off for a bit longer, from his left breast pocket he pulled out the little gift he’d brought, a small square parcel, just wrapped up in white tissue paper.

“Here, I saw these and thought of you, so I had to get ‘em for you.” He said as he held out the package towards her.

Lexi’s face was all shock. “Sher-...I mean, Beau…you shouldn’t have.” She said as she took the gift and stared down at it all wrapped up in her hands. “After everything you’ve already done…”

She trailed off, and Beau was slightly dismayed to see that the soft light of the day room glinted off the unshed tears in her wide hazel eyes.  He shook his head.

“No, really it’s nothing that special. Just something I thought might come in handy down the line. And well, the truth is they’re just too adorable, and I was glad I had a reason to buy them.”

When Lexi smiled, slightly confused, he smiled back and waved his hand towards the package. “Open it!” He encouraged.

With a small sniffle, she gently pulled apart the tissue paper in a slightly reverent manner and he started wondering how long it had been since she’d been given a gift. It hurt his heart to think about it.

Finally she pulled the paper back to reveal two tiny little sneakers encased in a clear plastic box. A small gasp sounded from Lexi as she held them up to get a closer look. “Oh my gosh! Look at how little bitty these are!” She gushed.

Beau laughed and nodded. “Right? They were just so friggin’ cute. And they made me remember when we brought Emily home from the hospital; we had an outfit for her to wear that was labeled, ‘newborn’, but she was swimming in it. I’m telling you, they’re even tinier than you can imagine. At least, Em was.”

Lexi was pulling the tiny shoes out of the package and holding them up to her still flat tummy. She looked up at Beau and her face once again held excitement and pleasure. “You know, the doctor said that I was probably about twelve weeks along, so I Googled it, and it says the baby is about the size of a plum, which probably wouldn’t be much bigger than this shoe! She could actually just fit inside the shoe right now!” She said with a wide grin.

It was the first time he’d ever seen her grin with actual humor. Usually, she just gave shy or embarrassed smiles. The grin lit up her face, and her bright hazel green eyes were absolutely beautiful. The sight made him want to put off the real reason for the visit for a little longer.

“She?” He asked. “Did you find out?”

Lexi shook her head. “No, the doctor said she still couldn’t be sure.” She shrugged. “I’m just…guessing.”

Beau wondered whether the “guess” was more of a hope. Maybe the idea of raising a boy all on her own, worried her; he could understand that.  But he didn’t ask, figuring that would be too intrusive a question. So, he just nodded. 

“Ah! Well, you know sugar and spice versus snails and puppy dog tails…I’d hope for a girl too.” He said, chuckling. “We were pretty happy with our little girl. Still am, as a matter of fact.”

Lexi smiled and looked at her lap again before she answered, subdued once again. “She’s incredibly lucky to have you.”

“Thanks, I feel lucky to have her too.”

As he saw her slightly sad smile, Beau had a sudden urge to wrap Lexi up in his arms until the note of melancholy left her voice and the gentle sadness left her face. He had that urge quite often actually. 

Which was one of the reasons he’d slowed down his visits. He was worried that his attachment to Lexi Weston was becoming unprofessional. Actually, he wondered and worried if his immediate need to help her, to keep her safe and protect her, had ever been professional. 

As a cop, he’d had the unpleasant task of dealing with domestic battery cases in the past. He was always willing to go the extra mile to make sure women in those situations were cared for, safe, and free to live out the rest of their lives far from their abusers. But that was where those relationships ended. He got them to safety, he testified in court about his part, and moved on, happy that they’d gotten out.

With Lexi, however, he found that he wanted to keep holding on to her, wanted to shield her every moment. But even beyond that, he found that he wanted to talk to her, exchange stories and discover what made her tick, find out what she liked and what she hated, he wanted to hear her opinions, wanted to make her laugh.

They warned cops during training that sometimes people formed attachments to the cop that saved them; sometimes they’d even believe they were in love with the officer who’d gotten them out of a bad situation, or that had pulled them out of harm’s way. Cops were taught not to encourage this behavior because it was unethical to take advantage of someone’s misplaced feelings after a trauma.

But Beau had begun to wonder if it ever went the other way; was it a natural psychiatric phenomenon for the cop to be drawn to the victim? To want to help them through everything, to want to ease their fear always, to want to make sure nothing ever hurt them again?

And was he a disgusting pig because of his observations the last time he’d come to see her? He’d noticed that she’d started to put on a bit more weight now that she was eating regularly, and healthily - that she was beginning to fill out her figure beautifully. Was that gross behavior? Because he’d definitely noticed, and his libido had definitely noticed too.

It had made Beau want to kick his own ass.

For God’s sake, she was a woman who’d been through extreme trauma, and the last thing in the world she needed was for him to be lusting after her like a creep. But no matter what he told himself, he couldn’t help the attraction. 

But he at least had the good sense to keep all of this to himself; he’d do anything to keep from making Lexi more uncomfortable, scared, and worried. So, he was never going to act on his ridiculous feelings. 

Sitting beside her on the couch now, he realized that he probably shouldn’t be sitting here, relaxing and enjoying her company so much either, and he finally decided it was time for him to get down to the real reason he was there.  

He let out a deep sigh. “So, unfortunately, I’m not only here with adorable baby shoes. I have some…news as well.”

The seriousness on Beau’s face and in his voice was obviously apparent, because Lexi  lost her soft smile and began to twist her hands in her lap and pick at her nails, a habit Beau had caught on to early on - a fairly obvious tell that she was scared and nervous.

“Okay.” She said in a small voice. “What kind of news?”

Beau took a deep breath. “The ‘not great’ kind, I’m afraid.” 

When Lexi’s face showed panic, he held up his hand. “It’s not terrible or anything. It’s just…well, a court date has been set for Simon’s case to be heard. He’s chosen to have the case heard by a judge as opposed to a jury, and we found out late yesterday afternoon which judge has been assigned to the case.”

Lexi chewed on her bottom lip before urging him to continue. “Okay, who’s the judge?”

Beau cleared his throat. “His name is Judge Morrisey. He’s…well, he’s a very conservative judge, with a history of some questionable rulings in domestic cases.”

Lexi’s face was pale, and she wrapped her arms around her waist, hugging herself. Beau continued, spitting the bad news out quickly. Not that there was much good news to take the sting out.

“He tends to side with the defendant in most domestic abuse cases, unless there is very strong, and irrefutable evidence on the side of the prosecution. And unfortunately…” Beau shook his head,”...unfortunately, most of what we have against Simon is just your word against his. There are no corroborating statements other than Cassie and I stating what we saw when you came to the station that day. But that can all be explained away pretty easily by his lawyer.  There are no records of hospital visits or previous police reports.”

Lexi burst in, her voice hoarse and rough. “I was scared he’d kill me if I went to the police.  And he never let me go to the hospital after. He broke my wrist once and just set it with some sticks he found in the woods around our house.”

She shook her head as though she couldn’t believe the injustice Beau was explaining to her. He nodded; he couldn’t really understand it either. 

He tried to reassure her. “We know, darlin’. And of course we all believe you completely, and we’re gonna fight hard to make sure he’s put away for a long time. The prosecutor for your case is a woman named Marsha Langdon and she’s a badass, and an amazing lawyer. She’s gonna give it everything she’s got.”

Lexi looked at him and the terror in her big eyes seemed to swallow up her whole face. Knowing that he shouldn’t do it, Beau moved closer to her on the couch and wrapped his arms around her. She immediately melted into him and he could feel her tears soak through the cream colored button down shirt he wore.

“I swore to you that I’d keep you safe, Lexi, and I’m not going to break that promise, no matter what, whatever it takes.” 

He realized that sounded pretty nefarious, and trying to assure himself that he hadn’t been talking about breaking the law, he continued quickly, detailing the perfectly legal means they were going to use to keep her safe.

“Marsha wants to come meet with you a few times before the first court date, which is a couple weeks from now. She wants to go over your testimony and prepare you for questioning from his lawyer and the judge.”

He squeezed her against him tightly and pressed his lips against the crown of her head. He tried to convince himself that it was no less than he would do for anyone who was crying and scared, but the feeling in his heart told him otherwise. 

Lexi shuddered once and then spoke in a soft whisper. “Will you be there? In court?”

He was going to tell her that he’d be there to give his testimony, but then he’d be expected to leave. But she pulled back to look at him, and the hope and fear warring on her face made him give a different answer completely.

“Absolutely. Every step.”

Hope won out in her expression and she laid her head back on his shoulder and sighed deeply. “Thank you, Beau.” She said quietly.

Shit, Beau thought with real trepidation, what the hell am I getting myself into?

[journey-to-the-attic]

I've had this AU in my head for ages but I only just got the nerve to submit it lol (long ask ahead, sorry)

Anyway so basically it's like: what if the brothers' fall goes entirely different. This is half serious and half crack? But basically after falling, instead of ending up in the Devildom they land in the human world, in animal forms. So like Lucifer's a peacock, Mammon's a crow, Levi's a snake, Satan's a cat, Asmo's a rabbit, Beel's one of those big dogs that go boof, Belphie's a fox. (I was going to go demonic animal for all of them, but then Beel would be a fly and Satan would be a unicorn which don't exist, and that's tricky to work with lol)

Basically they can communicate with each other but they can't speak like verbally, they can still do simple magic but no demon form transforming. They're just kinda stuck in animal form for some reason.

Ik sees a tattered crow hopping about by the road on her way home from school. It keeps getting startled by the cars but it's not flying away, and it looks really close to getting hit, which she's worried about. So she tries to shoo it away, and the crow stops and looks at her with these big dark eyes and she can't help but feel like it *understands* her when she tells it that it's dangerous by the road.

Next day the crow is there again, and this time it's staying away from the curb, as if it *listened* to her. And for some reasons he can't stop thinking about it... so the next day she buys a little bag of nuts on the way back, and when she sees the crow by the road again she scatters some of them for it, which it seems to appreciate.

Ik feeds the crow for a week before it's already comfortable enough to hop right up to her and wait for its snack. While she's watching it eat, she'll talk to it. After another week it seems to be *looking forward* to seeing her, because it sits on a tree watching the path she takes and visibly perks up when it spots her coming around the corner, and it seems to listen very intently when she's talking. It's like having a best friend.

Then one day the crow follows her home. Ik waves to it when she goes inside and it's gone by morning. And it isn't there in the usual place after school...

Then she gets home and finds the crow waiting on her doorstep. When it spots her it squawks happily and then calls to something. And then six animals that you would NOT expect a crow to be acquainted with emerge from hiding in a bush nearby. Does that dog have a fox AND a snake on its back? Is that a fucking *peacock*?!

Okay. This is weird and definitely not normal. "Are these your friends?" she asks the crow, as if it understands. Then the crow *nods*.

Basically Ik takes in the animal-brothers and takes care of them as best she can in her little house. (Bonus: cut to Diavolo and Barbatos in the Devildom, extremely panicked and confused about where those fallen angels ended up if they're not here)

I've got more thoughts but I'd like to know what you think first hehee

OOOOO I LIKE IT VERY MUCH!! i agree that this is a very half and half au, so let me think about the serious half for a moment...

if this happens directly after the fall, then there's a lot of interesting dialogue coming from the fact that all that war trauma's very fresh... though potentially, they'll all heal from it a lot more healthily, rather than repressing for centuries on end until a kid who cares too much shows up. this time, the kid who cares too much is right there immediately

i reckon the other brothers, especially lucifer and the twins, would be quite standoffish with ik at first. like, they'll acknowledge her help and be grateful for it, but belphie'll snap if she gets too close and lucifer doesn't like being alone in a room with her. but i think satan would latch onto her company quite quick actually - since he's new to, like, existing, and isn't quite sure how to be around his new brothers

mammon of course has decided ik is his new bestest friend ever. part of it is because his brothers are all very sombre and he doesn't know how to handle grief properly, so he's glad to have someone to just goof off with - part of it's because ik's the first face he saw after landing and he's, like, imprinted

(he did see other humans but none stopped long enough for him to get a look at them, and ik's the first one that approached him in good nature)

ik's main concern is not having a lot of room for all these animals, plus letting them get out. levi doesn't wanna anyway, she can be pretending to walk a dog with beel, mammon can just kinda go fly on his own and will look normal, belphie, asmo and satan won't look that out of place outside - the main issue is lucifer, because peacocks are not a normal sight in urban england

she resorts to waiting until the dead of night so that lucifer can get some air and loses a fair amount of sleep over it, and this is part of the reason lucifer starts warming up to her :')

[stemms]

My exile wasn’t even the “worst” part of it. I wouldn’t considered it that bad because Dream was always there with me, even when I messed up, he wouldn’t comfort me that often but he did if I seemed extra upset that day. I was pretty sensitive I’ll admit it. Exile was honestly pretty peaceful when I wasn’t in trouble. I even learned how to crochet which I’m trying to learn how to do now so I can make stuff again. I find it kind of funny that the only type of yarn Dream would give me would be green unless I asked a lot for different colors and gave him a good reason. I often made stuff for him and he wore it as well. I’m not quite sure if that was to just make me happy though… I’d say the worst part was the prison and the revival tests, he was really upset at me for escaping exile and he found me at Techno’s house and Techno couldn’t exactly defend me so that was fun. I could tell you about my limbo later cause this is getting long but is there anything you want to share and if you’d ever want to do a double Tommy rp, I’m down, I figure we could both help each other that way or not, whatever you want. I’m looking forward to hearing about your tl.

Honestly, I've always considered my exile not that bad because Dream was always there for me and at least I knew that he wasn't going to abandon me like others did, and I was willing to do and take anything for him, so I completely get it! He once literally gutted me, and the first thought that comes to mind whenever I think about it is “At least he didn't abandon me”. My Dream comforted me much more often and gave me plenty of hugs,,, But sometimes, the sight of my tears only annoyed or angered him, so I could never tell if he was going to comfort or hurt me.

It's really good to hear that you were able to indulge in a new hobby; crocheting sounds fun! It really is funny that he only gave you green yarn, but it makes a lot of sense because he 100% saw it as a way to mark you as his 💚 Awww, it was very sweet of you to make things for Dream! I'm sure he appreciated it because, despite hurting you, he still genuinely cared about you, just in his own twisted way. Not to mention that you making things for him was proof that he meant a lot to you, and that his work was successful.

My hands were too shaky after all the beatings and the times Dream had broken my fingers, so I couldn't do the same, sadly. But at least he was content because it meant that I was more vulnerable and had to rely on him more.

I'm sorry to hear the prison and the revival tests were so painful, but I completely understand because it was the same for me. My Dream never got a chance to find me at Techno's because I never really escaped, but I did build a tower and attempt my suicide. Luckily for me, Dream so happened to be nearby, so he saved me. He was worried sick about me, and the moment I was on the ground again, he wrapped his arms around me and started sobbing because he had nearly lost me, and he wasn't sure yet if the revival book worked. To my surprise, he didn't lash out or punish me, but later on, when he figured out that the revival book worked indeed, he gutted me to show me that I belonged to him, and only he could take my life.

Please do, I'm excited to hear about your limbo! Ohhh, a double Tommy rp sounds really nice, I'd love to do it :) How exactly do you imagine it?

[only-by-the-stars]

Any commentary on this excerpt?:

“How are you this evening?”

“Oh, you know, same old, same old...” Purah peered at the box. “So, Linky, what brings you and Mipha here? You got something new and exciting for us?”

“Some supplies Robbie requested.” He tried not to sigh at the nickname. “I don't know if that's exciting or not.”

“Eh, it works.” Purah shrugged. “Come on, I'm heading to his lab anyway, I'll go with you. Maybe I'll steal some of whatever that is if it's good stuff.”

“I don't think Robbie would appreciate that,” Mipha said politely as they followed Purah.

“Did I say stealing? I meant borrowing.” Purah grinned. “Besides, what he doesn't know won't get me into an argument, so just keep it quiet, okay?”

“What's our silence worth to you?”

“Oooh!” She whirled around, forcing them to stumble to a halt. “Wow, Linky, I never knew you had such a devious side to you! Still waters run deep, I guess...” She glanced at Mipha. “You don't look surprised...”

“I've known him since we were children.” Mipha gave him a fond glance. “Little about him surprises me anymore.”

“I see.” Purah tapped her chin with one finger. “And this wicked streak doesn't bother you? Eh?”

“This from the person wanting to steal from her colleague...” Link muttered under his breath.

“Hey! I heard that!” She scowled. “And I told you, it's... ah, forget it.” Purah rolled her eyes and turned around, flouncing down the hall. “Let's make the delivery so I can get back to my own research...”

Link and Mipha's eyes met, and they barely suppressed their laughter. “She'll probably wait till we're gone,” Link said in a low voice. “And then...”

“Shhhh!” Mipha smothered a giggle, her eyes sparkling with mirth. “She could hear you again!”

Luckily, she had too much of a head start to notice their conversation. A door banged open ahead of them, and they heard her call out. “Hellllooooo? Robbie? Got a delivery for you...” No reply. “Heeeeeeyyyy, if you're not here, I'm gonna claim it for myself...”

Mipha's gaze flew to Link. “Better keep a tight hold on that...”

“Yeah...”

Entering the room, they found Purah just inside it with her arms crossed. “Where in the world could—” A soft groan came from behind the nearby worktable, and she slapped her forehead. “Oh, for the love of...”

She rushed forward, and they followed. Behind the table was the source of Purah's exasperation: Robbie, lying face down on the floor in a puddle of what looked like drool. Mipha gasped and Link stumbled back, but Purah just rolled her eyes.

“Come on, you lunkhead, up and at 'em!” She kicked him in the ribs and he groaned again, slightly louder this time. “Up, up, up!”

“Oh, Purah, don't!” Mipha rushed to Robbie's side. “He could be gravely injured, let me see if he needs healing...”

“That's very nice of you, but trust me, he doesn't.” Purah prodded him with her foot. “This idiot just forgot to eat all day. Again.”

Link frowned. “This happens a lot?”

“I dunno if I'd say a lot, but it does happen every once in a while.” Purah sighed. “He'll be fine as soon as he gets some food in him. Don't worry about it.”

“I'll help.” Link set the box on the table and moved to Robbie's other side, careful to avoid the drool. Bending down, he slung one of Robbie's arms over his shoulders and rose, pulling him up. Robbie muttered something incoherent but didn't resist, his head lolling limply. “Come on. I'll fix something for us.”

“Oh, now, that's really sweet of you, Linky, but I'm fine...” Purah's eyes strayed to the box. “You all go on, though, and I'll get back to my work.”

“But Purah, it is so late in the day,” Mipha protested. “When is the last time you ate something?”

“Right before you showed up!” Purah plastered a big smile on her face. “I was on my way from the kitchen to—”

Her sentence was fatally interrupted by the earth-splitting growl of an empty stomach. Utter silence followed. Link and Mipha glanced at each other, and then turned their full attention on Purah. She shrank back slightly.

“Oh, wow, that's—that was one of you, right?” She laughed, a bit too enthusiastically. “I mean, it definitely wasn't me! And like you said, Mipha, it's getting late, and—and we all know how much Linky here likes to eat, so that was definitely one of you.”

“No.” Mipha shook her head. “It wasn't.”

“Oh come on, even after that long ride to get here?” Purah's eyes darted around. “I mean, it definitely sounded like you! But if it wasn't, it's got to have been him.” She gestured at Robbie. “Because I am one hundred percent fine, really, I—hey!" At a look from Link, Mipha had taken Purah's arm and was ushering her along towards the door. "Hands off, Princess!"

"It's for your own good," Mipha said firmly. Behind her, Link pulled Robbie along. “I promise.”

oh gosh I haven't thought about this fic in aaaaaages

I was inspired by one of the DLC Royal Ancient Lab fetch quests, where you deliver... something (I don't remember what) to Robbie in exchange for getting the ability to make pre-battle dishes with fewer ingredients, and the post-quest log has Robbie mention Purah finding him on the floor passed out from hunger and drooling. I decided I wanted to write a goofy little fic based on that, since I do so enjoy writing Robbie and Purah, and had a delivery from Link and Mipha be the perfect catalyst.

I figured that getting so caught up in work and research and forgetting to eat is probably something Robbie does fairly often, and decided that Purah probably does it sometimes too, much as she'd hate to admit it. I also love writing Link cooking, so that was a must for the solving of the problem here.

lastly, Link's devious streak is a nod to him doing things like scamming two pairs of boots off that one creep in BOTW. :3

[grishamanimationstudios102]

Smurfs: Emo Smurf (fan story) part 2

- Next to Clumsy, Brainy was also crying. Hefty asked Brainy, "What's wrong with you?" Brainy answered, "I'm just as sad as Clumsy is! Just leave me to my misery in peace!" After the song was finished, the Smurf crowd clapped as Emo Smurf took a bow to the audience. Smurfette said, "Do you know what happened to his stuffed bunny, Papa Smurf?" Papa Smurf answered, "Well, it's been past 50 years since he had it and now I hardly remember what happened to it." The next morning, the rooster crows to start the new day. At the Smurf Village, Papa Smurf tells his little Smurfs to clean up the mess from last night's talent show. So, the Smurfs went to work on cleaning up the mess. Hefty said, "I can't believe we failed to cheer Emo up." Poet said, "Yes, but his song was awe inspiring. I should write a poem about it." Brainy said, "Yeah, sure. When the stuffed rabbit is found." The other Smurfs yelled out Brainy's name in annoyance. Meanwhile, Clumsy picked up what appears to be the stuffed bunny he found in the Smurf Forest. He soon remembered the song and realized this stuffed bunny used to belong to Emo Smurf. So, he quickly ran over to Emo's house and knocked on the door.

- Emo opens the door to see his missing stuffed bunny, long thought to be lost forever. He was overjoyed to be reunited with his bunny. "Where did you find him?", Emo asked. "Uh, one day, while you were moping 'round in your house, I found a cute little stuffed bunny at a nearby tree. But then, there was this heartfelt song of yours, and now I knew who it belongs to.", Clumsy explained. Emo said, "Wow! That's very noble of you, Clumsy! No one has ever managed to find my stuffed toy before!" Clumsy asked, "So, does that mean you'll revert back?" Emo answered, "Not exactly. Even though you helped me regained my emotions, I'm going to stay Emo Smurf no matter what."

- Smurfette enters with Papa Smurf, saying, "Yoo-hoo! Emo!" Emo said, "Smurfette! What are you doing here?" Smurfette said, "Just thought I'd come to congratulate you on your song." Emo asked, "You think so?" Smurfette said, "Yes! It sounded so smurfy!" Papa Smurf said, "You see, Emo? Every Smurf has a talent, even you!" The village leader then asked, "So, are you going to keep your stuffed rabbit?" Emo pondered at first and then answered, "You know, Papa Smurf, I think I've decided I no longer need it anymore." Papa Smurf and Smurfette said in unison, "You don't?" Emo said, "Nah. If there's one thing that taught me besides smurfing talents yesterday, it's that real friends are more important to have around." So, Emo hands the stuffed bunny over to Clumsy, believing the lovable klutz needs it more than he does.

- "Uh, gee, thanks, Emo! You're a true blue pal!", Clumsy said. The other Smurfs, even Brainy and Papa Smurf, were pleased to see Emo let go of his past plaything and learned to move on without it. "Looks like Emo and Clumsy finally smurfed a happy ending between them! Right, Papa Smurf?", Brainy said. "It certainly looks that way, Brainy!", Papa Smurf said. Once again, another issue has resolved and peace returns to the village. And from that day on, Emo began to socialize with other Smurfs more often and began to appreciate paricipating in their activities. But for the most part, he continued to be all by his lonesome to keep his title. And the other Smurfs didn't mind, though they can get annoyed with him from time to time. End of "Emo Smurf".

[yespolkadotkitty]

So I don’t know if you do requests or if you feel like doing this. Today was a stressful day but was overall a good day but on my train ride back home from visiting a friend this man trapped me in my seat and wouldn’t stop asking for my number and a picture with me and then kept offering me money to come to his house. I was very clear that I was uncomfortable and there were lots of people around but no one did anything. When I got home I cried in the shower cuz I just felt gross especially cuz he kept trying to touch me even when I said no. I would just really appreciate a fic where one of the Pedro boys saved reader from that kind of situation. Marcus Moreno pops into my head cuz he’s a hero you know, but whoever you want is fine. Sorry to unload this all on you 😣

I am so sorry this happened to you.

Years ago I was on a bus and two guys were making fun of a woman. I stood up for her then and I'd have done it for you, too.

You shift in your seat, more uncomfortable by the second. The world seems to be getting smaller, choking you without a single touch.

“C’mon baby. I’ll show you a good time.”

I don’t want a good time from you, you try to say, but the words stick in your throat. The little mouse of fear skids down your spine, paralysing you.

The man looms over you, his wallet in his hand. “I can offer you more,” he’s saying. He smells unfamiliar, like fear and uncertainty.

“I don’t want your money,” you manage to eke out. 

A woman sitting across from you darts her gaze over and you catch it for a moment. Surely she’ll say something?

But she looks back down to her book.

The businessman nearby lifts his newspaper higher. Wow. They’re abandoning you.

Your faith in humanity drops another notch.

“C’mon, girlie,” the man adds. “Just one picture at my house.”

Your throat closes. You can’t sink any further into the seat.

“Hey, asshole. Can’t you see you’re terrifying her?”

Your haze of fear clears at the voice. You’ve never heard it before. A California-lazy drawl with a lick of Texas, commanding despite the slow register.

Your tormentor turns. “What’s it to you?”

You get your first glimpse of the man who’s intervened - the only person in this crowded train carriage who has bothered. He has a head of dark hair, mocha-latte brown, curling a little at the edges. His facial hair is short and scruffy, framing a gorgeous mouth. His eyes are acorn-brown, and currently narrow with anger. His shoulders are broad, and he wears a black t-shirt over jeans that fit him like they were painted on.

“What’s it to me?” he asks, and his voice is low and deadly. “What it is, is this. You’re threatening a woman half your size to get your rocks off. You’re either fuckin’ stupid or blind drunk, but if you’ve got even one iota of sense left, you’ll walk away now.”

The scumbag laughs. “Yeah? Or what?”

The taller man knocks out the asshole with a single, well executed uppercut.

He topples like a tree.

Your saviour catches the other man with ease, shoves him into an empty seat.

You open your mouth and close it again, and then finally say, “hey. Thankyou.”

The seat next to you is empty and the handsome stranger gestures to it. “Okay if I sit?”

“Absolutely. Thank you, again.”

He waves this away. “Anyone would’ve done it.”

“Clearly not,” you respond.

A few of the other passengers look away, guilt etched in their features.

“I’m Marcus, by the way. Marcus Moreno.”

He offers his hand - wide palm, long fingers - and you shake it, giving him your name. “Nice to meet you. What brings you on to this train?”

He lifts a shoulder in a half shrug. “Work. Travel for a meeting. You?”

You tell him where you’re going.

“Oh, that’s around the corner from my building.” He smiles, and if he was handsome before, he’s devastating now. “I’ve got some time before I gotta rub up against some suits. Can I buy you a coffee?”

[lyradaisical]

Oof, I totally did not keep up on my travel log after that first post. I didn't do a ton while in Singapore since I only had nights and weekends to sightsee. So I only hit up the basic places that people recommended seeing. Let's see how much I can remember now that it's been weeks since I got home lol.

The Hotel:

I stayed in the financial district during my time in Singapore, which means tall business buildings everywhere. The hotel I stayed at was above several office floors, so being 40+ floors up and looking out of the window was always an uncomfortable experience.

The bulk of the patrons were businesspeople there for work, which meant that it was a fairly quiet stay. No rowdy children or adults. Also, a mostly empty pool lol

I had expected to have to go out for breakfast every morning, but to my surprise: complimentary breakfast! Here's just an example of what I'd have in the mornings:

Overall, it was a nice experience. However...

I did get stuck in an elevator, which I now have nightmares about. On the way up to my room, the elevator was oddly slow and shaky and suddenly stopped at the 35th floor. I assumed that someone on the 35th wanted to get on. But the elevator just stalled there, shaking ever so slightly, and then the lights went out. I went through a few minutes of internally freaking out before I pressed the emergency button. The lights eventually turned back on and it took me back down to the lobby. Elevator rides will never be the same again.

Nightly Sightseeing:

Being in the financial district meant that there were a few things in the area for tourists to check out. The first thing I saw was the Marina Bay Sands light & water show which takes place every evening. I, unfortunately, did not get the greatest viewing spot, but it was interesting to watch nonetheless.

Behind me was the popular "boat hotel", as my husband calls it. I ended up going to the area on a different night to try to get a nicer photograph of the hotel. The light show also happened to be on at the time if you look close enough in the photo.

Gardens by the Bay:

Another popular spot nearby, Gardens by the Bay is a large nature park for anyone who enjoys greenery. Unfortunately, I'm not someone who handles heat and humidity (mosquitoes!) well, so that always takes my enjoyment down some. Walking through the park is free but there are two conservatories there you can pay to visit and get some relief from the heat. I did spend most of my time in the conservatories since it was a bit too dark to enjoy the outdoors. This park also has a light and music show every evening.

Here are some of my favorite pictures from the conservatories:

The Zoo:

Arguably my favorite part of Singapore. The vibe was just so much nicer than any zoo I've been to in the states; lots of greenery made it more immersive as opposed to the almost concrete jungle of some of the zoos here.

Back to the Airport:

As stated in my last post, I wanted to check out what the hype surrounding the airport was about. With my flight being in the evening and hotel checkout time being noon, I had several hours to explore.

There is a mall connected to the airport which I imagine a lot of people appreciate when they have to kill time. Though the downside is that you can't buy much when you have to get on a plane later unless you have space in your baggage. I did snag some Pikachus from the Pokemon store. As with most other places, there's a lot of water and greenery on display. The top floor had various attractions but I didn't do any of them. Honestly, my favorite part was the banana-shaped caution sign.

There is also a butterfly garden in the airport, which was very fascinating. Of course, being butterfly-friendly meant the garden was quite hot and humid and so I was pouring sweat a few minutes into being in there.

Bonus koi pond by the coffee shop:

That's basically it for my trip. It wasn't super eventful but it was relaxing. This isn't much of a log but I at least wanted to share some of the photos I took.

Hopefully the next time I go on a trip, I take better logs lol.

[dzpenumbra]

1/7/23

I had a lot of positive things I was carrying into today. I had momentum. I had motivation. I had confidence. Even despite being woken up like 4 times by my upstairs neighbors. I got up, I stopped myself from "helping" some local person realize that their crusade against the entire Goodwill chain was really because they were upset that the branch manager was rude to them when they denied their donations a week after new years, at the busiest and most stressful time of year. I didn't comment, I walked away. I was better for it.

I did my yoga. Brutal. I felt weak. I was weak. I fell over. I shook. I felt faint. But I made it through it. And I reminded myself that I've done 30 day challenges like this every year since the pandemic started, and every year I complete them. This will be no exception. Day 5, done.

I showered. I listened to an album that I haven't had good associations with since college. That two broken, damaged, unfair relationships ruined for me. And I vowed to reclaim that album. Its beauty should not belong to pain alone. It deserves to be appreciated, not feared. And I made it through the whole thing.

I got my TV. I paid 50 bucks for some woman to drive the thing 8 minutes to my door and have me take it out of her fucking car because she "dislocated her shoulder". The frustration of this didn't really hit until the walk back to the apartment. I was fucking awake anyway. I was up and moving anyway. I was just so fucking frustrated with myself. All because of this stupid trauma and anxiety shit swarming around me because I have a fucking wolf at the door every goddamn day. And I'm baiting the fucker to my door. And I answer the fucking door like almost every goddamn day. Like an idiot. I'll clarify in a second.

I sorted boxes. Finally. I took my momentum from getting my TV and transmuted it into sorting my recycling, breaking down boxes and organizing. The plan being, when the TV was done, I could break down that box too. Then I can load all the boxes into the cart and bring them up to the recycling and get it over with. Keep the ball rolling, always keep the ball rolling. Thats my strat, it's literally the only way I get shit done. What happened, you ask? Oh, I'll get there, don't worry. Don't wanna glaze over this bittersweet gem.

I got two simultaneous texts when I was in the shower. Surprising, because I never get texts. I mean that. I never get texts. So I heard the sound and I legit assumed it was part of the music. One was my mom, asking if I needed any support today. The other was my sister in law. My sister in law was letting me know that she and my brother and nephew (who I haven't even met yet, he's getting pretty close to a year old now) were nearby and wanted to see if it was cool if they dropped by. My place is an absolute warzone. It makes me wonder if they've ever really... even seen what any of my houses look like. I honestly don't think they have. I mean, the entire perimeter of my main room is packed cardboard boxes full of my possessions. I have barely any furniture. I look like I moved in yesterday. It's been over a month. It's humiliating. And it's really not kid-safe. And the worst part, it's 100% a mental health thing. And I really shouldn't have to explain myself. But if I don't it is kinda unfair to other people to blindside them with this when they show up.

I let my sister in law know that my place was a mess and... well... my confidence was high so I said if they wanted to they could feel welcome to drop by. I'd swallow that pill for the chance to finally meet my nephew. Here's the part that I didn't really process, that I'm just processing now. They were in town meeting a potential babysitter. You know, looking for child care. While I'm 20 minutes away, unemployed, have trouble leaving my house and I haven't even met my nephew yet. And I have several months experience babysitting my "former godchild" at the exact same age. And I'm just... not considered. Again, I would wager because of mental health. Or just... not getting to know me. No clue. Fucking odd that I'm not even considered for dogsitting, I just lost my fucking dog 6 months ago and it doesn't even pop into their heads that maybe I might miss it a bit? That maybe 10 years of experience raising the same breed of dog alone might be enough to qualify me? And maybe I could use some cash? Because I'm technically unemployed and I have no income? Like... I'm not kidding... it's really fucking weird that the babysitting thing... I used to get my goddaughter to nap and keep myself entertained, our compromise, was to put on Twilight Zone, the original series. She'd conk right out and I'd have something cool to watch. And now, this shit just feels like I'm straight up in an episode of it. I mean that genuinely, it's a big part of why I can't even smoke weed right now. Because I start to feel like I'm actually in some kind of fantasy series or something, that this is fiction, that some trickster god is fucking with me, or aliens or interdimensional beings or something. Because how could this be fucking real life?!

Glad I missed that (sarcasm), because besides overcoming the yoga obstacle... that was the best thing that happened today. I started setting up the TV and I was concerned about putting it on my glass-top coffee table. I called my mom to get her opinion. It started okay. Then I started setting up the TV. The setup stuff was kinda in broken english, which is always... it kinda feels like a bad sign? Like maybe corners were cut? You know? And a little anxiety about that whole "maybe this is was a bad investment, maybe i picked the wrong TV" came up. But I squelched it pretty quick. Then it came time to get my TV connected to the wireless router. And guess who hasn't entered his wireless password in... oh god... over 2 years? Because my PC and Xbox were hardwired and my phone/laptop just autosaved. Guess. It was me. I forgot my wifi password. But hey, check it out, Xfinity is super convenient, right? I remembered that their app lets you just pull up the app on your phone and hit a button and you can get right into your router, don't even have to do any of that admin browser entry shit. So I pop open the app and log in. 2-factor hits me, of course. Then I'm in and my fucking account says "INACTIVE". Yep. And the address is my old address. Yep.

So I try to get my mom to get into her account, in case... for some mysterious reason... it was set up in her name. She forgot her password. She tried to get me to give her my login and my password, for some reason. After like 10 minutes, I made it pretty fucking clear that I really do not feel comfortable reading out my login and my password out loud with paper-thin walls in my apartment building. It just started off with that goddamn tone where it was like... she was just doing whatever the fuck she wanted and she "knew best". Like what the fuck do you even need my password for? I'm literally logged in right now. You need YOUR password. Can you tell I'm angry? Well stuffing that down and repressing it for 3 fucking hours of pulling teeth will do that. Every time I asked for something, every time I asked a question, just fucking goddamn stonewalled. Like, I shit you not, I asked 4 consecutive questions and she flat-out acted as though the Men in fucking Black came in and neurolyzed her. Like I never even spoke words. I had to check to make sure I wasn't muted. But she was straight up fucking ignoring me and dodging. And I'd bring attention to it. "Hey, I've asked you a like 3 questions now and you haven't answered, can I get that information please?" and just... deflection. Dodging.

So why the fuck did I stick around this? Why was my hand glued to the goddamn lit stove? Because I do not have access to my own internet account. If anything goes wrong with it, I'm fucked. I don't have the password, it's not in my name, if I call support I strongly doubt they'd give me access without confirmation from the account holder. Because she owns that part of my life. And this has been done "for my convenience" for almost 2 decades. I got my rent out from her control. I got a few other things out too. But my internet is apparently in her name. And my insurance. And my car insurance. And my car itself. Which is why my car has been sitting idle in a dealership lot not being repaired, they haven't even ordered the parts. And they haven't even spoken to me. Because her name is on the fucking car. I'm 30 goddamn 6. I didn't choose this. I've literally known no other way. This is how things have always been. I mean that. I had no idea this wasn't normal until really recently. And I really feel like I'm in some kind of Britney Spears conservatorship or something, I don't know. It scares me, because I endured some really fucking abusive shit tonight. Like having the 3 hour dragging feet, power struggle, making shit difficult bullshit being blamed on me because I have memory problems. That I literally can't do anything about. That hurt me more than anyone else. I actually have to leave notes around the house for myself to remember to get basic things done. It's not an easy life when you live fucking alone. Shit falls through the cracks every goddamn day, every hour, it feels like.

I had to hang up again. I was very clear dozens of times that what was happening was not okay, and that it's a repeat of the same fucking problem over and over, and I was just told over and over that I brought it on myself. That it was warranted because she was simply "defending herself". And she wasn't even trying to control herself. Not even attempting. She was just... right. And I was wrong, and "aggressive" (not stressed, not frustrated, not having his problem be taken over by a geriatric woman who was not welcomed and asked several times to stop, "aggressive"), because that justifies her anticipatory "defense".

I get stressed with a problem. The "supporting" person misreads my stress as aggression towards them. The "supporting" person does not verify this assumption, but acts on it by "defending" aka retaliating. I get my ass beat by my "support" for being legitimately stressed out about a real problem I'm having. Totally healthy.

Now I guarantee that at least 2 of my neighbors heard my side of the argument. Oh fuck, I almost forgot the best part! Oh so my dad decides to barge into her room and just start talking to her when she was on the phone, and I asked her to relay a message to him and guess what? He fucking responded. Because I was on goddamn speakerphone the whole time. Yep. So next time, I'm super tempted to put her on speakerphone so that my neighbors can witness the entire reality show. Not just think I'm a complete asshole. Like I just fucking moved in and already it's like... fuck. AAAGHGHHHH.

My depression was at an all time high before this. It's been escalating super rapidly. I've been very open about this. And this is the second brutal beating in 3 days. I had one day of recovery. ONE GODDAMN DAY. And now. I feel like I've been up for a week straight. I've gotten one good night's rest in 2 fucking weeks. I feel like Christian Bale in The Machinist. I mean that. The skin on my face feels... tight and clammy. My cheeks feel sunken. My posture is like bullets are flying over my head at all times. I have bags under my eyes. I am constantly tense and in pain at all times.

So I reached out at 11PM, I called. Stupid, but I wanted to communicate clearly. I left a message. "Congratulations, you broke me. I need a list of all of my accounts that are in your name by 4PM tomorrow." I can't be the monk anymore. I'm too weak. I'm not going to lash out. I'm not going to explode. But I'm not hiding the fucking truth anymore. My will was broken today. Over a fucking wifi password. OVER A FUCKING WIFI PASSWORD. AND THE PASSWORD WAS FUCKING PASSWORD, OKAY?!?! AAGGGHHH. I am fucking human just like all of you, I have feelings too, very very strong ones. And this is the extent of how much I'm willing to express this one. Suffering and anger swirling together because my ability to live my life is being blockaded by a control freak who constantly shames me for not "being independent". I'm broken. And having a moment of weakness. But even in that moment, I have the clarity to know exactly what I need to fucking do. I need to be free. I. Need. To. Be. Free.

No more punishment because I didn't phrase things the way they wanted. No more looming threats. No more dangling friendship, bonding, affection, and social support... and making me pay prices like this and come out with less than I started. No more weaponizing my own mental health struggles against me. The only reason I dealt with this today was because that account is not in my name, I cannot legally access it and I don't even know where to start with getting legal counsel. I even tried to get the account changed to my phone number so I can change the billing info myself and access the router, talked to some dude in fucking India to get it set up and they didn't do it. I've already had my power, heat and cable shut off from missed bill payments and shit at my old place because of this "help" and "support" I'm getting. Just because I've never done this before and I have executive functioning struggles doesn't mean this is a guaranteed failure if I take these responsibilities on. It's scary as fuck to take on so much shit I've never done when I'm like... on the edge and super overwhelmed already, but I have to. Because paying this price?! Paying this price, I'm gonna be dead before I hit 50.

I'm not even leaving the house! The primate graphic novel idea was a great inspiration, but also a really great therapeutic tool, and I had a vision come to me yesterday of primate Me cowering inside the door and a bunch of gigantic beasts gnashing their teeth outside. Guess what? They ain't outside. They're in my phone. They're in my eardrums. They're crawling into my mind. Almost every single day. I can lock my doors, I can barricade the windows. And they still get in. Because I welcome them in. Because I, from the bottom of my soul, with every ounce of optimism I have, try to keep faith that people are redeemable. That they can change. And I give so fucking much of myself, my entire life, to support that effort. And I just get shit on for it.

So, fuck it. I gave it 3 years of trying. GG. Call me when you find God.

I found myself having a very dark thought earlier, and I want to be completely honest about it so I can not just shrug it off. So I can process it and move forward with it in mind. My cat is going to be 17 in about 2 months. She has osteoarthritis, hypothyroidism and kidney disease. She's a scrappy motherfucker, she always has been, but I'm afraid she may not have much time left. My dog is already dead, she died in July. I have no friends. You know what they say, "you can tell who your real friends are when the chips are down"? Yeah. Sad, but true. I have no family. Not really. My father was never a father. My brother flipped out on me because I asked him if he wanted to make music with me, and if he wanted a free art lesson while my landlords came over to inspect my house, to get my mind off shit, to distract me. My other brother hasn't had a real conversation with me since early high school, and communicates with me extremely rarely through his extroverted wife. That's all I got folks. So... my cat is really all I have left. Because I have to really strongly consider that my mom cannot actually stop herself from crippling me.

So what happens when my cat dies? All I will have is my art, my writing and my music. And without financial support from my parents, I'm pretty damn sure that's going down the drain too. No way I'm paying these bills on that kind of salary. So... yeah. That might be curtains. I mean. What kind of life is it really if I can't be myself? If I can't fulfill my purpose? How is that living? In this life, yes, I suffer greatly. Regularly. Likely shaving years off of my life. But at least I get to pursue my passions. When I'm not just perpetually recovering from the last brutal emotional beating. With the world the way it is now, with no connections in any field, not even any contacts... I don't see it happening. I see myself working somewhere, anywhere that I can. Just to get money. Just to keep food in the cupboards that are already bare. Just to keep a roof over my head. I will not be living. I will be surviving. And I honestly don't really know if that's a life I want to live, to be honest. I can't live a fulfilling life, I cannot fulfill my life's purpose, if I am merely surviving. The gifts that I have can not function when I am in survival mode. Ask Rimworld, they added it as an an actual game mechanic. Inspiration comes when good mood is sustained. Mental break comes when bad mood is sustained. Two sides of the same coin. I will be reduced to a miserable laborer, grinding the days away until I find the sweet release of death. And that's not a life, that's not living. So, I'm keeping that in mind.

This is insanely dark. I want to apologize, I feel compelled to. But I'm tired of apologizing for my own pain. I just need to get my pain out a bit, because I currently don't have any other coping mechanisms besides distraction and yoga, and I'm sore. Weed will make this worse, I've thought it over a dozen times and I really believe that right now. Drinking is not available, but I'm starting to strongly consider it. Prescriptions are not a thing for at least a month. Cigarettes have been dangling in my peripheral view for days now, I can hear their siren's song every day. "We can solve all your problems, my dear." For a price.

So, this is where my stress has to go.

I don't know what to do. I don't even know if I can sleep. It's 3:30 again, I'm exhausted, but I'm fucking terrified. And just... wounded.

But hey. At least I broke down some of those pesky cardboard boxes, huh? I'm sure cleaning my house will make shit right as fucking rain.

I've tried so hard to be a beam of pure light for as many others around me as I can be. And that light is a barely flickering ember right now. Even Jedi have their limits.

[afieldinengland]

Sorry to hear you've been sick, dearest one! Let me kiss you better, my boy, my sweetest boy! Autumn is wonderful in many aspects but the common cold is, well, common in those months. I've yet to suffer through one this year, but i'm quite sure it will come sooner or later. I always have The Cold once a year, after all.

I see you've had an intense day, politically wise! I can only laugh, filled with confusion, as british politics is quite crazy to me. I also think the cat should become the next PM.

I'm glad I didn't get misunderstood with the flatmate thing! Serious discussions after a couple of drinks can be very helpful and I'm sure your friend appreciates your help and willingness to listen!

I had a dream about you the other night! I completely forgot to tell you, but I woke up all confused, so sure it all happened and yet wondering how it was possible. We were by the river somewhere, on a sandy patch under the tree. It looked similar to the place my father used to fish in, but much more english - I guess my imagination cannot picture you in scenarios that aren't the English countryside. You wanted to get to the other side of the river and I suggested we go to the bridge nearby, but you simply walked into the river. I chased after you and I think we must have reached the other side safely because the next moment we were in the middle of a small town, looking for a shop where we could buy some very particular spices - you insisted whatever we were going to make would never taste good without that spice. As it is usual in dreams, we could not find any shops at all, they were either closed or just gone - empty places between buildings. It also didn't help that it was the middle of the night.

It was a confusing dream, I admit, though not more confusing than the usual ones I have - but I woke up thinking "wow, it doesn't make any sense, I can't remember finding that spice with Lamb, why would I go home and go to sleep before that? I'd never give up like that"

Yet again I am rambling about unimportant things; you must forgive me, but I am in a rambling mood now. Perhaps it is because I am quite tired today, my mind forcing me to get some odd scenarios out of my head. Hope the story made you smile at least, my most treasured wild river-crosser of my dreams! - HWA (sorry if this letter seems all over the place - it's been a weird day, I can't focus on things, but I didn't want to leave you without a letter either)

dear one, you must forgive me for yet another late reply!! thank you, sweetest forest-spirit. you’ll be glad to hear that i’m coming out of it again now, at least as far as i can tell— a small mercy, really, as some of my flatmates have had it much worse. yes, you’re right, it’s one of the strange things she brings on her fingers, one of the icier gifts intermingled with frost and fruit. i hope it isn’t too severe when you do get it, lover 💓 please know that i’ll be right here to nurse you as best i can, as you have done for me!! and it certainly is a curious time for politics…. things have gotten even more bizarre in the last day or so, i’ve gone back to making myself a hermit from the news, haha. a dream, you say, most sacred one? what an honour, to show up in the dreamscape of my companion!! and how odd, that you saw a patch beneath a tree and by a river. you see, there’s a place i know well that matches that description entirely, in the town near my village— where i spent many happy, sometimes drunken afternoons with my friends when i was about sixteen or seventeen. perhaps it’s a sign from the gods, that we both hold a place like that dear enough to meet there!! and it does sound right, that i’d simply walk into the river…. we spent many odd hours in the water there in exam season after we were done for the day, still in our uniforms. i think my friends might have even conducted a mock-pagan, half-serious baptism on me with that water once, sometime in the last summer before i came away to university. oh, sorry for rambling, lover, i simply can’t believe a dream came with so many sacred signs!! i can see how the other aspects must have been confusing, that’s often the way. i hope you’re able to find some rest soon, beautiful one 💓 wise dreamer, the sunlit spirit who travels to me across fields and furrow guided by the gods— it made me more than smile, i promise, it’s a blessing i’ll treasure