#if you have any questions about what's going on here ask away

[rebelfell]

A li’l more self-indulgent bestfriend!eddie fluff…

reader w/ boobies, cont’d from here

“Do you, um…do you think you got a good enough look?”

Ringing. There’s a ringing in Eddie’s ears and he’s pretty damn certain his jaw is on the floor. And he is going to need about a million q-tips stat before he believes he actually heard those words come out of your mouth in that exact order.

Did he die? Is this a dream? A coma? Did he get trapped in the Matrix? If so, which color pill does he take to stay in it forever?

“Eddie? You okay?”

Your face fell the longer he took to respond, shrinking into yourself as worry washed over you.

Thinking you must have misread things, thinking he was just being nice, thinking you’ve just ruined everything by throwing yourself at the best friend you’ve ever had…

YES, YOU IDIOT! SAY FUCKING “YES” SAY SOMETHING YOU’VE BEEN QUIET FOR WAY TOO LONG SHE’S GONNA THINK YOU’RE—

“Sorry,” he chuckles. “Pretty sure I hallucinated. Any chance you can repeat that?”

“Eddie…”

He can almost hear you scoff and see your eyes roll before it happens. You glance around, looking for where you tossed your bag when you got here, but Eddie reaches out and wraps his hand around your wrist. His thumb rubs over the delicate skin on the inside of it, praying he’s not imagining it that he can feel your pulse quickening underneath the calloused pad.

“Sweetheart, you just offered me the single greatest honor and privilege of my life,” he says. “Forgive me for wanting some extra reassurance. Seriously…how is that even a question?”

Relief floods Eddie’s brain as your lips slowly spread into a smile prettier than every sunset he’s ever seen before combined. His heart is pounding in his chest, all his other organs shuddering with the force, as your hands carefully pull from his grasp and drop to the hem of your shirt.

The pounding stops. His breathing stops.

Everything stops as you lift it off fully this time, letting it fall to the floor beside your feet. It lands in a heap and Eddie is struck with the urge to fold a piece of clothing for maybe the first time ever in his life. Because if you ask him, that thing should be in the Smithsonian behind a bulletproof glass carrier—the first shirt you ever removed in his presence.

If that’s not historically significant, what is?

Except Eddie can’t even think about that any more, because now your arms are raising again and your hands are reaching behind your back to unhook the clasps of your bra.

Forget the Matrix. This is heaven.

He stares at you raptly, not even trying to hide the fact that his eyes are about to jump right out of his skull. Black lace falls to the floor and Eddie is tempted to join it, more than ready to sink to his knees for you and do whatever you say for the rest of his life. Only he can’t form the words to tell you that because all he can think about is how your bare fucking boobs are out in his room.

You are topless and literally a foot away from his bed and—god fucking damn it why didn’t he change his sheets?!

“Can I, um…”

His eyes dart between you and them, his mouth still agape. His hands flex at his side, his fingers trembling with the need to grip their softness, to mold and squish them in his palms, to roll your nipples between his thumb and index until he hears the sweet, sweet sound of your moans—

“Please,” you whisper.

Okay, yep. Definitely heaven.Only in heaven would you be the one pleading for Eddie to touch you.

“Fuck, they’re so pretty,” he sighs, almost mournfully, his eyes rounding as his hands came up to cup them gently. “How do you walk around with ‘em all day? I’d never get anything done if…”

He trails off, a flush coloring his cheeks, bashful smile making his dimples deepen.

“If, what?” you prompted.

“If they were mine.”

His eyes lifted to meet your gaze, deep brown irises brimming with heat. Your tongue darts out to wet your lips and his hands stretch, his fingers spreading wider and squeezing tighter.

“They’re all yours, Eddie,” you tell him with a small smile. “Do whatever you like.”

He doesn’t need any further instruction.

A breathy laugh flutters in your chest as he buries his face in between them. Eagerly, as if he was trying to suffocate himself. Shit, maybe he is. He’d happily die right now with your warm flesh on his face, the scent of you in his nose, and his breath rippling down the middle of your sternum.

He kisses and kisses and kisses them, like he’s the pope and you’re the tarmac. And then he’s shaking his head back and forth, moaning and humming and groaning while you erupt giggles—downright giddy with all his attention on you.

It almost makes you feel…proud of your boobs.

Because there were ones out there that were bigger than yours; ones that were smaller than yours; ones more evenly sized or shapely that better filled out dresses or low-cut tops.

But none of those boobs were the ones currently reducing Eddie Munson to a puddle before your very eyes. That’s just yours.

And they are perfect.

Eddie jumps when he feels you pull away, his head popping up, his bangs mussed and sticking out to reveal his vast forehead and his panicked eyes. Shit, what did he do? Did he bite you? He could have sworn he only thought about doing that, but maybe—

You step backwards, smiling as you walk him to the bed and guide him down with you to lay on the mattress. He slides up next to you, his body finding a home against every dip and curve of yours. He looks at your face, brows raising in a silent question until you give him a nod.

“Can’t believe this is really happening,” he moans, burying his face back where it belongs. “I’ve wanted this so long, you have no idea...”

“How…how long?” you gasp, breathless as he kisses all over them, his tongue swiping over your nipples. “Eddie, how long have you felt like this?”

“Fucking forever,” he groans into your skin and the vibrations make waves across your chest. “Can’t remember the last time I went to bed and didn’t think about this…about you.”

And you know you should be melting. You know you should be flattered by what he’s saying and to be over the moon that the boy you’ve been in love with your whole goddamn life actually wants you too—but all you feel right now is rage.

“OW! What the—”

Eddie yelped as you reached over and pinched the skin on his stomach as hard as you could. He pulled away, staring down at your hand and the bright red spot it just made on his pale skin.

“You idiot!” you snapped. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Wh…what?”

“I’ve been going out with losers for years trying to get over you.”

Eddie blinked back at you, his mouth falling open so he looked a bit like a carp with stage fright. His head started to shake back and forth, wiry curls rustling as he stammered out an answer.

“I…I thought…”

His head dropped, shoulders slumping as he thought of all the men he’d ever seen you with. Cool guys. Normal clothes. Normal interests.

No freaks.

“The guys you were picking were nothing like me. I…I figured I wasn’t your type.”

His big, round eyes flashed back up to yours and soundly vaporized all the anger that overtook you. Because it was true. You always avoided guys that reminded you of him. Always went for the dishes the polar opposite of the one you craved.

Because eating frozen yogurt only ever made you want ice cream more.

“You should have said something, Eddie,” you whisper. Half scolding, half an apology.

“You should have said something,” he countered.

But Eddie nodded, leaning in close to bump your head with his. It made you both smile, yours and his cheeks both pushing up as they touched. And then it wasn’t just your cheeks touching.

His lips met yours with a gentle brush. Almost accidental, but not quite. Delicate and light like the start of a snowfall. It made your stomach swoop and your neck stretch, chasing the feeling. His eyes scanned your face, searching for any sign of hesitation before he dove back in.

There was none.

“Now, if you don’t mind…” he smirked as he crawled on top of you, scooting down until his face was level with your chest, “I’m getting back to the greatest moment of my life. That okay?”

thank you for reading, love you mean it 😘

[erwinsvow]

hii shea idk if someone has already made this type of request if that's the case please ignore me but i can't stop thinking about shy!reader absolutely cock drunk asking for the first time rafe to fuck her raw and the question caught him so off guard that he felt feral and dizzy, his composure slipping away just wanting to please his sweet girl<3

hi baby omg no i don't have any reqs like this here it is hope i did it justice <33

rafe was teasing you today.

after more than an hour of back and forth at whatever party you two had gone to for the evening—and only because rafe wanted to sell and your friends had already promised they'd be there—you were more than ready to go home.

except rafe hadn't taken you home yet. instead you'd been all around the house—on rafe's lap in the living room to start. leaning in to your boyfriend's ear, you know he can tell how desperate you're getting.

you don't do well with denial anymore—rafe had spoiled you too much for that.

"can't we go now?" the words are whispered to rafe, and you rest your head on his shoulder, blinking up at him while you wait for a response. one of his hands leaves the armstand of the sofa and grips your exposed thigh, skirt riding up a little too much.

"it's early. hold out a little longer. can you do that for me?"

you think your eyes are going to roll all the way back. the answer is yes, of course, you can do that for him. you would do anything for him. you just don't want.

following that, you accompanied rafe to the other side of the house where a whole swarm of people were chasing their next high. though you should really stand next to him, you just can't find it in you today, instead staying his back, peering out every now and then like shy children do.

it's all worth it, because moments later rafe takes you upstairs, murmuring something about how you're being a good girl for holding out. there's an empty bedroom that you think is the perfect place to spend the next hour.

rafe's talking to you—though you're so deliriously horny you can't really hear him. you nod and stare up, agreeing to whatever your boyfriend wants to do, just wishing he would hurry up and do something already, when the door opens.

you're not naked, though if they had barged in a few minutes later, you might have been. and normally you think your face would be burning, that you might die of embarrassment at someone catching you like this.

instead you're just mad.

it's the owner of the house—which makes sense, since your boyfriend has brought you up to the master. he's got a girl of his own on his arm, and you grind your teeth getting up with rafe, furious and impatient now.

"at least knock next time!" you yell when you shuffle through, ignoring splutters of it's my house!

you think rafe is going to ask you what you want to do next—but he doesn't. your boyfriend, like always, knows what you need before you can even know it sometimes. you follow rafe back to his truck, ready for, at the very least, some peace and quiet.

when you finally get up to rafe's room, the buzz of the party is wearing off a bit. your feet hurt from your heels and you can't believe you yelled at someone. lost in your own thoughts, you don't even process rafe sitting down next to you, until he takes your feet into his lap, undoing the strap of your shoes for you.

it's instant—one touch from him is enough to set your skin on fire.

"oh," you say, at the sudden realization you might finally be getting what you want. you stare at where rafe is holding your ankle in place, shoes on the ground now. "thank you."

"s'nothing, kid. get on the bed." eagerly, you comply.

in the vain hope that rafe was as impatient as you are—you thought he would just fuck you already. but it seems not, with the slow way he kisses up and down your neck, down to your tits and your stomach.

you find it a lot easier to ask him for things now—a new dress, dessert, money for your nails—but it seems impossible to ask him for this, so you opt for enjoying it and staying silent.

but even then—rafe always knows when something is wrong. you're practically vibrating from anticipation—you had wanted your boyfriend to fuck you hours ago on that stupid couch from that stupid house. it seems your body was only now realize how long you'd been clenching your thighs, biting your cheek and ignoring the tense knot in your stomach.

a few touches from rafe was enough to have you practically melting—staring up and still not saying anything.

"y'okay, kid?" he asks, and you really don't know how to answer. "s'okay. you're getting what you want."

you can do this. you're patient—you've always been patient.

"can you-please, just-" alright, maybe not. "can you please just fuck me raw, please, please, just fuck me-"

of course, rafe's not stupid. he could tell you've been on edge all night, he just hadn't known why. he stares down at you, all flushed, hot skin and heavy breaths, looking up at him. he knows whatever reaction he gives you will stay on your mind, and though he can try as hard as he wants, you are impossible to say no to.

"jesus. s'that really what you want?" you nod eagerly. "can't regret this later, baby. once we do that, it's-it's serious. what if i knock you up, huh?"

rafe watches you take in the words, facing twisting in understand.

"please knock me up."

[fanaticsnail]

Can you write something romantic for yandere Mihawk? Like a drabble or headcannons?

🐈‍⬛

I don't think I've ever written yandere before, but I wanted to give it a go. I hope this is what you were looking for! 🖤🐌

Obsession

Masterlist here

Word count: 1,200+

Synopsis: Many believe Mihawk keeps the knowledge of his spouse a secret because he is a private man. Truth of it is, he is simply obsessed with you and doesn't believe any other pair of eyes is worthy of meeting their gaze with your majesty.

Themes: yandere!Mihawk x gn!reader, possessive attitude, obsession, infatuation, pining, longing, lusting, love, romance, kissing, yandere trope.

Notes: I will do anything to write a man in love. I love how period-drama romance looks on Mihawk, and I couldn't not write him with a little bit of a possessive flavour. I made the banner with OPLA's Mihawk wanted poster.

Tag list: @since-im-already-here @feral-artistry @mfreedomstuff @gingernut1314 @jintaka-hane @daydreamer-in-training @carrotsunshine @indydonuts @i-am-vita @sordidmusings

While many were aware that Dracule Mihawk was married, they simply presumed he was a very private man. He enjoyed keeping to himself, and allowing himself the courtesy of remaining in solitude with his spouse while tending to his title as World's Greatest Swordsman.

In some aspects, he did. He did enjoy keeping to himself and remaining in solitude while he lived in the high keep of his castle, surrounded by swirled mountains and his well-tended gardens. But at the crux of his entire life, the center of his world and the prized diamond in his vast treasury, was you.

You ruled his heart, controlled his chin and the direction his gaze fell with a simple whisper of a word or the scent of your perfume. He was a man consumed, humbled by his infatuation to the point where his love fell into captivated, depraved fixation.

To put it simply, Dracule Mihawk wanted to keep you all to himself. He was a man consumed by his bewitchment and infatuation with the owner of his heart.

He was never one for sharing, never joining a crew or forming a bond other than rivalry with another person. As soon as he met you, everything changed for him. His heart soared, his breath was stolen from his lungs, and his eyes never strayed from honing in on your beauty.

He wasn't sure what it was you did or didn't do that had him fall to his knees and begin to worship at your altar. All he knew was he wanted you so desperately, craved to be by your side always, and wanted to shy you away from the wandering eyes of all whom he deemed unworthy to have their gaze fall upon your majesty.

When your courtship first commenced, he attempted to keep his tribute humble and small. But as your eyes lit up at the first offer of a simple rose he carved from his favored floral shrubbery, he knew he wanted to spoil you with lavish luxury. Each gift was catered to your interests and tastes, items you never thought he paid enough mind to your conversation while promenading, hand interlaced within the crook of his elbow.

He paid mind to it all. The way your voice changed when speaking on your passions, the questions you asked him about his life before working for the World Government, how you paused in the garden and listened to the sweet chirps of birds begin courting their mates. He hung on your every word, movement and motion.

For someone so stoic and reserved, the way his heart melted for you the moment your eyes met was as if his cold vessel was chaperoned into the bright light of a warm sunset. He couldn't get enough, and when he was certain you returned his love, he refused any exchange of dowry for your hand.

He wanted you to be his just as much as he desired to be yours. That was more than enough for him, and he would never leave you for wanting or without for all the days of your life.

The first time he was summoned to perform his duty as a warlord for the World Government after your marriage, he was overcome with rage at the thought of leaving your side. He almost took the head of the carrier bird with the summons for his assignment, but withheld his violent act at the sight of you offering the bird your Berry, and gifting them your palm filled with sunflower seeds.

As soon as the bird fled, he lifted your palm within his own, brushed the darkened casings of the remains from the seeds' shells, and rose the flesh to his lips to kiss away the indents of pecks the bird left in raised welts on your skin. Cupping his bearded chin, you rose his amber eyes to meet with yours.

“I will return to you,” his voice mourned for you above the softest whisper, “I will always return to you.” Leaning his cheek and chin into your palm, he closed his eyes and furrowed his brows in deep yearning.

“You are always so good to me,” you responded in a tone that mirrored his own, prompting his eyes to snap open and gaze deeply into your own. “I trust you to find your way home once you conclude this contract.” Ushering his face closer to you, you whisper against his lips before fully making contact, “I will be right where you left me, waiting for you to return.”

Mihawk's eyes darkened, his pupils blown black and eclipsing his honey-hue with the intensity of his possessive gaze. He knew he was many things to you, and good was far from a sentiment he held for himself. His desire to keep you secret was not to keep you safely tucked away from those who wished to do him harm, but because he was truly a selfish man.

As your lips closed in around his own, he was ready to commence his enthusiastic consumption of all that you had to offer him. Each kiss he pressed into you felt both like the first time he had ever felt such passion, and the last time he was ever to claim such a prize.

Hands clawing at your hips, he drew you flush with his own and angled his chin to deepen the oscillation. Tongue darting out to taste yours like a delicacy he was never again to roll over his palate, the muscle ground against your lips and lewdly consuming your kiss with lusting desire.

Both pulling away from one another, he rested his forehead against yours and took a moment to catch his breath. Eyes closed and brow lowered, he shared breaths with you and savored every moment you shared with one another.

“I crave the day we meet again, my precious consort,” he pressed his lips to your forehead, “My guiding light to point me home,” his lips dart down to claim your cheek beneath it, “The crown jewel in my treasury, and reigning monarch of my very soul.” He pressed a chaste and longing kiss once more against your lips before pulling away.

“Always so charming, my love,” you smile up at him, removing your hands from his face and smoothing over his leather shoulder pads of his outer great-cloak. “I will be right here ready to receive you, as I always am.”

“My beloved,” he whispered, his eyes falling half-lidded and dark eyelashes fluttering from your lengthy confession.

“My dear,” you breathed his whisper within your chest and replaced it with your own. You pressed your lips to his cheek, an offer of your blessing to embark on the next chapter of his journey.

Dracule Mihawk was a man consumed with the love he had for his counterpart. He rued each day to depart from your side, and would have no quarrel with offering his opinion as such to the official whom summoned him.

Truthfully, he was a man infatuated by his spouse that it bordered on domination by his strongest emotions, but choosing to keep them beneath the surface to not tighten you with his intensity. It was his addiction, his fix in a world full of darkness and torment.

He was your loyal zealot, knight and fierce protector, and you...

You were his obsession.

[sweetbans29]

Teach Me: The Tragedy of Conflict (vi) - PB

Pairing: Paige Bueackers x Reader

Previous Part

Summary: You and Paige have been best friends for the last 6 years. You trust her completely. And it is because of that trust that you ask her a rather forward question. AKA - You ask Paige to teach you.

Warnings: suggestive, tiny pains, bigger pains

Word Count: 4.1k

Sweetbans Masterlist & Teach Me Masterlist

AN: You knew it was coming soon.

Over the next few weeks, Paige's internal battle continues to grow. If she thought she was struggling before, each growing day continues to add even more thoughts and doubts that she has when it comes to you. But that isn't the only thing growing, her craving for you has exponentially increased since the last lesson.

Paige thinks about how intimate the two of you were at the most inconvenient times. She pictures you lying on her bed, half naked when she is studying. Her mind replays the sounds you made when her lips were on your neck while she was conditioning in practice. She closes her eyes in class and sees your back arching and hears you saying her name over and over again and all she wants is more.

But the last few weeks have been dry. No lessons, no 'practicing' as you would like to call it, just Paige longing for any touch she could get from you. Even those felt scarce.

Paige is studying with Azzi when she feels like she is going to combust.

"I need something, anything. I have been itching for weeks now," Paige says. The same book has been turned to the same page for the entirety of their study session. Azzi on the other hand was making good progress on her paper.

"Paige. I have been telling you for weeks to tell her how you feel. You are the one who has chosen to ignore any and all of my advice." Azzi says.

"It is not that simple - we freaking live together. What if she doesn't feel the same? That is how many years of friendship thrown away?" Paige says in frustration. She is getting heated.

Azzi laughs.

"What could possibly be funny about this?" Paige says pushing Azzi's computer.

"It is that simple. Just tell the girl you love her and I am sure it will all work out." Azzi doesn't know how much more blunt she can be without flat-out saying that you love Paige. Azzi's suspicions were confirmed that night you walked out of the bar with tears rolling down your face.

"F-that, I will not be the one to talk first," Paige says fed up with the conversation she initiated. She begins packing up her things.

"Where are you going? You haven't even started your assignment." Azzi says as she watches her frantic friend.

"I am going home to change and then WE are going out," Paige says.

"Paige, I don't want to go out tonight," she says.

"Come on, drinks on me," Paige says trying to bribe her to come.

"Fine, drinks AND food on you," Azzi says as she saves her paper and starts to get ready.

The two of them go to Paige's favorite local spot and meet up with some other teammates. They are all having a blast - drinking a little (or a lot) more than they should be for a Tuesday night but no one cared. Practice the next day wasn't until the afternoon so they could sleep in and nurse their hangovers all morning.

It is just after midnight when Paige gets a call from you.

"Hey B, where-are you at a bar?" You say when you hear Paige pick up the phone with a lingering 'hello'.

"Indeed I am!" She yells. "You are the smartest," Paige says with a giggle.

"I am coming to get you," you say as you rummage around your room to find something to throw over your PJs.

"Okay, I will sit right here until you get here," Paige says as she sits on the stool of someone else's table. The people give her a questioning look. "Oops, maybe not there," Paige says moving. "I will sit right here until you get here," Paige says as she is sitting one seat over but still at the same table.

"Did you get that? I moved." Paige says making sure you know where she is at. It doesn't matter as none of what she is saying is adding up since you can't see her at all.

"Okay B, don't move," you tell her.

"Imma be a statue," Paige says as she thinks she is staying still as a pole but is actually swaying to the music.

You let out a little laugh, "I'll see you soon."

You hang up and find Paige's location on your Find My app. You head to the bar, parking right out front and leaving your hazards on. Walking in, you immediately regret the decision to throw on just an oversized sweatshirt of Paige's and wish you would have opted for some sweats as well.

As you make your way through the crowd - which is surprising for a Tuesday night, and find Azzi and Evina first.

"Have you guys seen Paige?" You ask looking around.

Evina shakes her head no. Azzi nods her head over to the little stage in the corner as Paige steps up to sing karaoke. You are also now shaking your head as you watch your best friend make a fool of herself. The more you think about it in the seconds before the song starts, you think it is better to have her upset with you rather than videos of her singing karaoke drunk in a bar circulating the internet.

You weave your way to the stage and grab her arm, removing the mic from her hand. She yells your name in excitement until she sees you are taking her away from the spotlight.

"Let's get you home B," you say as try to get her off the stage.

"No, I wanna singggg," Paige whines.

"You can sing in the car, let's go." You pull her off the stage then wrap an arm around her waist to steady her. "Trust me, you will thank me later."

Paige lets you guide her out of the crowd, her arm now around your shoulder as she waves to her other teammates. You just shake your head and laugh as the girls follow the two of you.

Once you get back to your car, three girls pile in the back as you stick Paige in the passenger seat. You drive them back to your apartment building and begin to part ways.

"Thank you for coming to get us," Evina says with a hiccup.

"Always," you say as you wave goodbye to them.

Paige is asleep and you know once drunk Paige is asleep, she is not the easiest to get to do things.

"B, wake up. We need to go inside," you say shaking her arm. She brushes you off and turns the other way.

"B. I want to go to bed, can you please get moving." You beg the girl who makes no movement to move from your car.

Finally, you get tired enough to grab her arm and pull her out of the car. Her eyes only open a little as she now has to hold her own weight Her arms come to wrap around you, hugging you and nestling her head into the crook of your neck.

"Hi B," you say as you rub her back with one hand and close the door with the other, making sure to lock your car in the process.

"Smell like heaven, favorite smell," she says as her breath tickles your neck.

"Thanks B," you chuckle as you try to shift her to one side of you so you can walk the two of you up to your apartment. Her head stays hidden in your neck as she is now sidestepping with you as you lead her home.

Once the two of you are in your apartment you take her to her room.

"No," she says like a little kid.

"B, you are the one who was just about to sleep in my car." You say.

"Want yours," she says with a pout.

You roll your eyes. At this point you let her go and she puts her hand out to steady herself on the wall. You walk away from her and remove her sweatshirt. When you do, your shirt rides up giving Paige the perfect view of your bare back before you pull it down and walk into your room.

Paige instantly follows you into your room and plops down on your bed - her mind tells her she wants you but her body is exhausted.

She rolls over as you come to her. You start by taking her shoes off and placing them on the ground. She then lifts her arms.

"Flip over," you tell her as she rolls back over so she is lying face down on your bed. You pull at the sleeves of her jacket and remove it. She is left in her pants and tank top. Good enough, you tell yourself as you go to turn the light off.

When you finally lay down you feel Paige shift over to you. Her arm comes to hang around your waist.

You sigh.

Paige's head comes to find the crook of your neck again, her lips painfully close to the sweet spot on your neck.

Little to Paige's knowledge, she has been on your mind as much as you have been on hers.

You lean in just enough to have her lips meet your skin and you release the softest moan. Paige's hand grips your waist as she brings you closer to her, lips starting to move on your neck.

You savor her movements as she begins to pepper kisses up towards your lips.

Before her lips meet yours, you snap back into reality and remember she is not in her right mind.

"We shouldn't do this," you whisper. Paige's movements continue - not hearing what you said.

You place your hand on her cheek and bring her face up to yours. She leans in wanting to feel your lips on hers.

"You're drunk, B," you say. "You should go to sleep."

She looks into your eyes with what you believe to be love but tell yourself it is the alcohol.

She holds your gaze then kisses your nose and curls back up into your side.

The next day at practice Paige struggles and Geno is not having any of it. By the end of it, Paige looks like she has taken a beating. Everyone goes into the locker room to shower and head out but Paige stays back to go through more reps.

"B, you need rest." You say as you walk back out to see her working on her midrange jumper.

You know she isn't going to stop until she is content with her shot so you stand there watching her shot.

After about 10 minutes she finally takes a break.

"Adjust your thumb, it is going to lax when you release." You tell her.

She goes up for another shot, making the change you recommended. It goes beautifully into the basket. She shakes her head.

"I still don't know how you do it," she says a smile finally dawning her lips. "And why didn't you say that when Geno was drilling into me, huh?"

You laugh. "Because then you wouldn't learn to not drink in the middle of the week."

She looks at you with disbelief. She throws the ball at you and you catch it, dribbling it then shooting it.

Paige watches you in awe.

"Do it again," she says. You shake your head no, not really sure why you put it up in the first place.

"Please," she says as she brings you another ball, stands right in front of you, and places it in your hands. "Please."

You close your eyes and proceed to do a shootaround, Paige feeding you the ball. She watches you, eyes never leaving you. When you are finished you are slightly out of breath. You didn't miss a single one which even you found impressive.

Paige walks over to you.

"That was incredible - why did you ever stop?" She asks, not realizing what she is asking.

You sigh and sit on the ground. Patting the spot next to you. She sits across from you, wanting to see you.

"Before we met, I was set on going to UConn to play ball - there was no doubt in anyone who saw me play. They all knew I was going to play for the best," you say referring to Geno.

Paige bites back the joke she wants to make about how much you are hyping yourself up right now - she doesn't want to jeopardize your comfort in this moment.

"And no, I am not just bragging about myself - you can ask Coach yourself. He came to watch me play when I was in 7th grade, already counting down the days until I made my debut here." You say.

"That all changed when my mom left us on my 13th birthday. I woke up that morning excited for the day only to walk downstairs to see a single piece of luggage and my parents fighting. They kept yelling about me and what was going to be my future. She said she was tired of losing her daughter and that I cared more about basketball than I did about her. It was ironic because it was her and dad that taught me how to play. She was my mother and she believed I didn't love her and chose the sport over her. To be fair, I loved the sport more than I loved a lot of things, but never her. She cursed out my dad for ruining my life, saying things about how he was going to break me and I would never make it under his pressure. She didn't understand the relationship my dad and I have. I destroyed my parent's marriage and was the reason she left." You say and quickly wipe away the tears. Paige has scooted her way to you and has taken hold of one of your hands.

"I watched her walk out that day - what was meant to be the best birthday turned into the worst. I was sitting on the stairs as she walked out. She turned to look at me but didn't say a thing. She had said all she had to say. And she walked out."

"My game changed after that - had me in my head. I quit shortly after that. Quit playing that is, started learning the why behind all of it. Behind every play, every move, as many players as I could. I thought understanding the why behind the game would help me understand why my mom left. It didn't of course, but I was still just a kid you know? I didn't understand it fully - I still don't understand it fully."

"My dad saw me deep dive into learning the game from a different perspective and saw how I was excelling in learning the game faster than I learned how to play it. We both sort of just threw ourselves into it - neither of us knowing how to cope. It is how we connect with one another."

"I have started shooting again - but it still hurts. I don't know if there will ever be a time when I am shooting that I don't think back to that day. It is like a blessing and a curse. I feel free when I have a ball in my hand but am reminded of the cost. It clears my head but also opens old wounds."

Paige sits there and listens to every word you say. Out of the 5+ years of friendship, you have only ever mentioned your mom once. Paige remembers when you told her about your mom in the park but you never mentioned this. She feels tears well up in her own eyes.

Her hands come up to hold your face. You can't look her in the eyes so you just close them. She pulls you in and holds you.

She doesn't say anything - not that she would know what to say. All she knows how to do is hold you.

Once the sun begins to set and the gym begins to darken, the two of you head back home.

The team decided to hit the town that weekend after the game. You tag along, knowing you could use some fun. You stick to your classic while the team does a whole variety of different shots and drinks.

"Take a shot with us!" Evina yells as she orders another round.

"You know she doesn't, she likes her classic," Paige answers for you. You push past her, already feeling the effects of your first drink.

"No, I'll take one," you say, already shooting it back before Paige can stop you. She just watches you in surprise. You grab hers and throw it back.

"Ok, I think someone needs to slow down," Paige says and tries to grab your drink. You just box her out and tell her no.

"Let me have some fun B," you say. "I need a little fun."

Paige puts her hands up and lets you do what you want.

You make your way to the dance floor and start dancing with anyone and everyone. Paige watches you from a distance.

"Go dance with her," Azzi says as she comes up to Paige.

"Nah, she can have her fun," Paige responds and takes another sip.

Paige hates seeing others hands on your body but she isn't going to do anything to stop them. Rather she is going to find her own distraction.

By the early hours of the morning, Azzi can't find Paige anywhere and takes it upon herself to make sure you get home safely. When she takes you to your apartment, she realizes you don't have your key and is forced to take you to hers. You sleep on her couch.

You wake up to a major hangover, wanting nothing more than to be in your own bed. As you make your way out of your friend's apartment and stumble to your own, you come across the same realization that she had last night. You are keyless.

You knock hoping Paige is home. You are about to give up when you hear the ruffling of the lock.

When the door opens you are not met with your best friend, but some girl you believe is on the cheer squad.

You look at her with confusion and walk right past her. Even in your hungover state you know the first rule you and Paige had about the apartment was to not bring anyone back after a night out. All flings were to be done anywhere but there. You are quickly sobered up as you walk into Paige's room expecting to find her asleep in her bed but she is not. You walk back out into the living room - she's not on the couch.

"She's in her room," the girl says as she wraps herself in one of your sweatshirts. She probably thinks it's Paiges. Your heart drops to the pit of your stomach. She points to your room.

You push the door open slightly to reveal a sleeping Paige, naked in your bed. Clothes scattered throughout the room.

You grab a few of your things, desperately trying not to look at her.

"I don't think she will want you to take her stuff," the girl says as sees you packing some things into a bag.

You ignore her and finish grabbing what you need.

"Hey! I was talking to you!" The girl says loud enough to cause Paige to stir.

"Babe, why are you yelling?" Paige's sleepy voice cuts through the air., as she turns in time to catch her eyes meet yours before walking out.

Paige begins to scramble to her feet, forgetting the fact that she is butt naked, and attempts to go after you but you slam the door and are long gone.

"Paigey, come back to bed," the girl says, already lying in your bed. She's ready for another round.

Paige tunes her out, as all she can think about is how royally she messed up.

Paige is pacing the apartment trying to figure out what happened the night before. She swore she and the cheerleader were heading back to her place. The thing is, Paige doesn't remember being that drunk. She can pretty much remember everything.

Paige sent the girl away after you had left, making sure to get your sweatshirt back from her before she did.

Paige knows she messed up - you guys really only had the one rule and she had broken that. Not only that but she has brought another girl back to your room. What the hell was she thinking?

She tried calling you multiple times but it went straight to voicemail. She then tries calling all of her teammates to see if you went to any of them - only two of them answered.

"Don't worry P, she's probably just sleeping off the hangover from last night - she was super wasted." That was the only real response she got.

Paige decides to go to Azzi's to see if she has seen you. Azzi peaks her head through the door. Once she sees it's Paige, she steps outside and closes the door.

"Azzi - I know she is in there, let me see her," Paige says.

"Paige, I don't think that is the best idea," Azzi's voice is soft.

She tries to go by her but Azzi grabs her arms and looks in her eyes.

"Just give her some time, okay?"

"I don't know what happened," Paige says in defeat.

"I know P, I've got her. Just go get some rest okay?" Azzi says.

You don't go to the apartment for the next few days. You avoid going to any place Paige might be - that includes staying away from the team. The first time you see her is at practice on Tuesday, seeing that you weren't there on Monday.

The team is in the gym and Paige is anxiously waiting to see if you will be there. When you walk in alongside Geno and the other assistant coaches she is relieved but also now extremely nervous.

You don't give her any attention throughout practice. Paige even tries altering her shot to get you to come over to tell her how to fix it but you never do. All she gets is Geno yelling at her to focus or he will make her do suicides.

At the end of practice, you slip out before the girls leave the locker. Little to your knowledge, Paige never went in and was waiting in the parking lot for you.

She calls your name. You hesitate but keep walking. She runs to you and grabs your arm.

"Don't touch me," you say pulling it away.

Paige is taken aback, losing her words.

You look at her waiting for her to say something, anything really. When she doesn't, you speak.

"Okay if you won't talk, I will. I told you the darkest part of me - a part of me that less than a handful of people know. I opened up to you because I love you. I love you, Paige. I thought you felt the same, I thought I saw it in your eyes but then coming home the other day and seeing you brought another girl home. There was a fire that burned within my veins that fizzled out leaving nothing but disappointment. It wasn't that you slept with another girl because that wasn't the issue. The issue was that we have one rule. One rule. Not relating to our lessons but to our home. Our one rule, thrown out the window. See it might have been different if I walked in and you weren't in MY bed. But that is the only thing I can see in my head Paige - what the two of you were doing in my safe space."

Paige wants to say something but nothing comes out.

You sigh. You feel defeated.

"I don't know what to say B, I don't have the energy to fight with you." You look at her for the first time in days - your eyes are tired. "I forgive you. But I need to make myself clear when I say I need space."

Paige wants to argue, tell you how big of a mistake she has made and how much she regrets it. She wants to tell you she loves you and has for years now. She wants to tell you she isn't going to leave you. That the girl meant nothing and all the girls over the years have been a distraction for her - a distraction to get you off her mind. But none of that comes out.

You nod and get in your car and drive away.

Paige watches you leave. She doesn't know what to feel more, the peace of knowing you love her or the pain in knowing you are so much better than she is. She doesn't deserve you - that is the thought that clings to her.

She doesn't deserve you but needs you to survive.

AN: It almost feels worse when forgiveness is given instead of asked for. Let me know what you think. And as always, thank you for all your love and support 💙

[kasagia]

Right Hand - Epilogue

Pairing: Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!exBeneGesserit! reader Summary: Your future with your baron. Your dream future. Your long-won future. Warning: 18+; violence; blood; Feyd Rautha; death; fight; brutality; smut; It's very hard for me to end this one… Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Main Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ PART VI ~•♤♤♤•~

"Count Rabban." You nod when you pass Feyd's brother on your way to the throne room. To your surprise, the man stops and bows to you, which makes you frown at his extraordinary and strange behaviour.

"Lady Y/N. My congratulations." The man says, stunning you for a while. Your heartbeat accelerates when you wonder how the hell he could tell that you are pregnant.

"Um... thank you." You answer uncertainly and look at Feyd. He tightens up at his brother's words; you can see that he is clearly furious at his brother's comment. What the fuck was going on here?

"You should go, brother. We still have a lot of rats to hunt down." Fed says this and puts his hand at the bottom of your back, pushing you towards the throne room, as if he wanted to walk away from Rabban as soon as possible.

"Of course. I'm surprised you won't join me, but if I were you, I'd keep an eye on my woman too. After all, pregnancy is a real blessing for us.” You froze at his words. You look stunned at Feyd, who seems to be getting more and more… nervous. You frown, confused by everything that is happening around you. Since when in hell have these two been civil towards each other?

"Obviously. Just go." Feyd hastens him and practically pushes you into the throne room. He shuts the door behind you with a loud bang, not allowing any servants or guards to follow you.

He doesn't give you a second glance. He goes straight to the Arrakis projection and starts explaining to you the recent actions he took while you were... unconscious. However, you can't focus on what he's saying; your thoughts are still revolving around what Rabban said, so at some point during his long speech, you simply interrupt him and blurt out:

"Pregnancy? Who the hell is pregnant?"

There is a long silence in the room after your question. You think this is the first time you've seen Feyd-Rautha… embarrassed. And as much as it's a new and strange sight, you want to know what the hell is going on. So you walk up to him and grab his chin tightly, forcing him to look you in the eyes.

"I could have mentioned that you were with my heir to mobilise our troops to march to the desert and stop the great families from... complaining about me searching for you instead of focusing on killing Muad'Dib." You blink a few times, staring at him in shock when you hear this.

Your hand falls between you, letting go of his chin, which you can tell he's mildly happy about. You frown, trying to imagine him telling all the great houses that you were pregnant with his child.

Which actually isn't far from the truth now…

"I… Why the fuck am I not even surprised? Anything else besides this fake pregnancy?" You ask, shifting your gaze from him to the map of the desert, where the points of stationing units, the movement of soldiers, observed points, and recently conquered objects were marked.

"I couldn't say that you were just my concubine. They wouldn't take me seriously..." He starts, eyeing you carefully, having no idea what you were going to do. Just in case, he puts his hand on his belt, ready to activate his shield at any moment. Although he doubted anything could actually protect him from your anger.

"What the hell did you tell them?" You ask, annoyed, turning to face him. He takes a step back, pretending to move something on the map, but really wanting to be as far away from you as possible when he gives you this message.

"That you are my fiancée." He repeats calmly, taking your exasperated sigh and rubbing of your temple as a good sign. At least you're not attacking him with a blade. Wouldn't the idea of marrying him be as... repulsive to you as it used to be?

"You announced to the great families that I am your fiancée AND that we are going to have a child? And they believed you?"

"Yes, why not?" He asks, furrowing his hairless eyebrows at your surprise, slightly offended that you thought it was such impossible thing to happen.

"Because the very idea of you proposing to me is ridiculous and unrealistic." Your eyes widen as you see him move to kneel in front of you. You grab his elbow tightly, not letting him move even an inch, as you shut down his attempt to propose to you. "Do NOT do this now. How could you? And behind my back..."

"I can ask you the same question. Why did you literally stab me with a blade and leave me bleeding on the ship so you could play 'How to Destroy the Atreides House', risking your life, and worse, without me? I should punish you for that, little witch."

You stare at each other defiantly, each insisting that the other is wrong and carries more fault. However, the more you think about it, the more you come to the conclusion that maybe he was right. You both did shitty things. And it is possible that you will make even more of them in the future.

"Call it even?" You finally ask, deciding to let it go this time. After all, you had smaller things to worry about. Arrakis. Emperor. Irulan. Maybe he will finally tell you what happened during your... not necessarily voluntary absence.

"Only this time." He nods, cupping your cheek in his hand. He seals your deal with a kiss, his tongue slipping into your mouth and joining yours in a mad dance as Feyd steals the air from your lungs.

You moan into his mouth, cradling his cheeks in your hands and bringing his face closer to yours as his hands rest on your hips. He manoeuvres you across the room, making you both approach the large throne. You break your kiss as he pushes you onto the stone seat.

"So... what's now?" You ask, placing your hands on his shoulders as he leans on the armrests of the throne, leaning over you.

"Now... I'm going to lock you here, and I am not going to let you go out until we create this heir of ours." He mumbles against your neck, placing feathery kisses there. You sigh softly, running your nails over his bald head.

"Of all the possible excuses, you had to come up with this one?" You ask, trying to maintain what little control you have as the pads of his cold fingers lazily stroke your collarbones. He squeezes your breast, earning a small gasp from you, and he chuckles contentedly, biting into your neck. He reluctantly pulls away from your neck and rests his forehead against yours, taking a moment to look into your eyes.

"I wish you could have seen their faces." He whispers hoarsely, making you shiver, and kisses you again. His plump lips take their time caressing yours as he enjoys the kiss, finally having all the time in the world to bask in your warmth, scent, and taste.

You smile into the kiss, distracted by his proximity. It seems unreal that the two of you can just enjoy each other without worrying about other things, without any urgent matters to attend to, enemies to kill, or evil plans to carry out. It was weird. Pleasantly weird. But you had been under the pressure of something for too long to just enjoy this peaceful, blissful moment without trying to find an excuse to stop him.

So when his hand goes under your skirt and lazily caresses your thigh, you place your hands on his chest and gently push him away from you. You look at him for a moment as he furrows his hairless eyebrows, trying to understand why you're doing this.

"Me too. But as much as I want to fool around with you, I think that we should focus on diplomacy and policy for a while. It wouldn't be in Giedi Prime's interest to create heirs before we establish government, and... can you stop undressing me?" You ask as his fingers begin to untie the bodice of your dress, realising that you were only pushing him away for the sake of politics and to solve Giedi Prime's issue first, which he obviously didn't want to do now.

"I have been covering the policy for the past few weeks. Now, I have more important things to worry about. Like how to untie those damn strings with one hand."

"But... the council..." You try, sighing as his mouth attacks your neck again as he loosens the ties of your dress, exposing your breasts to him.

"They will wait." He mumbles as he moves from your neck to your collarbones, his fingers teasing your nipples. You sigh, biting your bottom lip as he explores every little bit of your skin. "I have a little fantasy that I want to fulfill with you, little witch…" He purrs against your breasts. You hold your breath as he suddenly grips your hips tightly and lifts you up. He sits down on the throne and settles you on his lap, completely removing your dress and throwing it behind him. He licks his lips, staring at your naked form, and you blush under his watchful gaze. Bastard…

"But… oh, Feyd…" You moan as he leans towards you and takes one of your nipples into his mouth. You dig your nails into his shoulders. Sitting astride him and stabilising herself on his lap. His other hand slides from your chest down your stomach to your core as he teases your overstimulated pussy. He chuckles against your breast, only intensifying your sensations as he discovers how wet you already are for him.

"Yes… that's right, my right hand. Allow me to repay you for your faithful service to your new Baron." You kiss him hard, passionately, tugging at his clothes and stripping him off of them roughly, wanting to feel his abalaster, muscled chest as quickly as possible.

He doesn't do anything to help you. He just teases you, getting you so aroused and excited that you can't even dream of interrupting him again. Instead, you take and take everything it has to offer you. And it's a pleasantly blissful change.

"Marry me." He whispers in your ear when you lie wrapped in sheets in his bedroom after a fairly intense session.

You sigh and roll your eyes at him. He had been trying to convince you to marry him for a week, and as pleasant as the idea seemed, you were well aware that it wasn't that easy. He couldn't just choose a wife, and moreover, a woman without a family name or fortune.

"You know it's not that easy. I have neither titles nor a significant family name. I am only your right hand. The Council will never support this idea." You sigh, snuggling into him. He huffs, offended by your response, but wraps his arms around you anyway and holds you tightly to his chest. As if to at least make sure that you wouldn't be able to leave him even though you didn't agree to marry him.

"Have I ever asked anyone for their opinion? Have I ever cared about the opinion of these old people?"

"No. But you should. You are a baron now. Marrying me would make you weaker in their eyes. Besides, being your concubine absolutely suits me." You speak even though you don't know who you're trying to fool. Yourself, him, or both of you.

However, you don't take into account that he knows you perfectly. He grabs your chin with two fingers and forces you to look into his icy blue eyes. You shiver as his piercing gaze reaches almost to your soul.

"It is not. I know it well. You never wanted to be just a concubine. That's why you didn't want to accept my courtship for a long time. I don't want you as my concubine; I want you as my wife. I need a strong baroness by my side—one that will be just as terrifying as me. You can't refuse me now. Not after what we went through to be here. I know you don't care about the opinions of anyone in our council, so tell me why you don't want to become my wife, little witch?"

You look at him for a long moment, wondering how much you can tell him from what you saw in your visions. He senses your hesitation and gently pushes you off of him and moves to get out of bed, but you stop him by wrapping your arms around him. You rest your chin on his shoulder and whisper into his ear.

"I … I had visions … visions in which our marriage ended terribly … and I don't want it to happen. Not after how long we fought for each other." You say that and press a kiss on his earlobe. You hug his back, ready for him to walk away from you in anger, but instead, he places his hand on yours and squeezes it tightly.

"Haven't you been the one who did not believe in the prophecies and fate? Who believed that we create our destiny ourselves?"

"Yes, but..."

"Then marry me." He interrupts you and turns to look at you. He cups your cheeks in his hands, forcing you to look into his eyes. "I promise, I won't hurt you. Never. Not me. I promise to protect you against everything that will come and to be by your side for good and bad. I promise you all of myself and everything I am. I promise to go back to our bed and keep you in it even after the worst quarrel in the world, because I am nothing without you by my side, and I prefer to argue and fight you forever than not to have you with me. I... I just want you."

His words tug at your heart. You know he's not effusive, that he doesn't like talking about his feelings, and this is a very rare moment when he shows you his weaknesses. And you really appreciate it, but you can't help but have doubts.

"But what if..." He doesn't let you finish your sentence. He cuts you off with a kiss, caressing your lips with his, preventing you from making any protest.

He places his hands on your waist and holds you tightly close to him, ignoring your attempts to speak. He pushes you onto the bed and looms over you, still kissing you. Not until he's sure he's taken any air from your lungs.

You inhale quickly, flushed as he strokes the pad of his thumb over your cheekbone, drinking in the appearance of you beneath him: flushed, dishevelled with beautifully swollen lips.

"Marry me." He whispers, pressing a short kiss to your lips. "Marry me." He repeats against your cheek. "Marry me." Another feathery kiss, this time on your earlobe. You shiver as his hot whisper reaches your ear. "Marry me." A kiss on your neck. "Marry me." A kiss on your collarbone. "Marry me." A kiss in the valley of your breasts. "Marry me." A kiss on your stomach. "Marry me." A kiss on your pussy crying with need.

You sigh, scratching your nails against his scalp as he keeps whispering the words against your clit, working towards your orgasm as if you're going to say yes and accept his proposal the moment he takes you over the edge. At first, you find his attempts absurd, but with every second, every kiss, and every whispered request, you realise how much you want to just say yes and let him do whatever he wants with you.

You wrap your legs around him, digging your heels into his back and pulling him closer to you. His hand wraps around yours in a tight grip as his tongue works tirelessly to please you. You don't know how he keeps whispering his request, but you know when your eyes meet for a moment that you can't respond with anything other than...

"Yes."

You growl as he stops all his movements and lifts his head to look at you. You tighten your legs around him, willing him to move back into place, but he stays firmly above you.

"Feyd..." You complain, but he silences you with a quick kiss, so quick that you don't even get a good taste of yourself on his tongue.

"Later, impatient needy witch." He scolds you. In retaliation, you reach for his nipple and pinch it, making him growl. He squeezes your hips and leans in to leave a hickey on your neck.

"You made me this way." You complain, propping yourself up on your elbows and pressing your lips to his, stealing a kiss from him with a giggle. He pushes you back onto the bed, your head bobbing, and he smiles, showing you his black teeth.

"And I plan to do much more to you when you're my wife. So, will you marry me, little witch?"

"Why doesn't this sound like a question but a threat?" You ask, smirking, not yet giving him the answer he wants to hear. You can barely contain your chuckle, watching as he furrows his hairless eyebrows at you in irritation.

"I've been asking you for a week, it's your fault my tone changes from day to day when you keep me waiting."

"Don't you know that the best things are worth waiting for?"

"They are. And I've been waiting for you for years. So maybe you can finally end tihis? Can you do this for me, my right hand? Will you be my baroness?" He asks you, stroking your cheek, giving you his full attention as he waits for your response. But you just can't help yourself from teasing him a little bit more.

"Such a high promotion… people will think I slept with you to get it." You joke stupidly, enjoying your small victory, when he rolls his eyes at you in annoyance. You're lucky his daggers were abandoned halfway from the door to the bed... otherwise you would have ended up with a dagger at your throat long ago. Not that he would ever hurt you. Just to scare you a little.

"Y/N..." He growls at you and nuzzles your temple. You place your hand on his neck and pull him into a gentle kiss, lazily brushing your lips against his. A low murmur escapes his throat as he pulls you closer to him.

He's practically lying on top of you, keeping his body weight on his arms but letting you feel every inch of him against yours. You enjoy this newfound intimacy with him. This closeness, sense of security, love, deep adoration, and peace. So how can you say no to him when he prolongs every second of your kiss, tries to maintain contact with your body as long as possible, and treats you with a tenderness he has never shown to anyone before?

"Yes... yes, I will marry you." You whisper, smiling as you watch his reaction. He doesn't believe you at first, trying to make sure you're not joking with him again, and when he makes sure that you have no intention to take back your words, he leans in, crushing his lips against yours.

You smile throughout the kiss, even as he pinches your sides, his form of punishment for teasing him for so long. He bites your lip, just enough for him to taste your metallic blood on his tongue, sealing the deal between the two of you. You take his hint and bite his lip yourself, drawing blood from him.

"About damn time." He murmurs against your lips, letting you take a few breaths before trapping your lips in a needy kiss again.

Such a moment of bliss and tenderness between you is very much needed. Especially after recent events. However, you know that you won't be able to enjoy peace with him for long. But as long as you both had each other's backs, you could face the world. And soon you will have one more little human to protect.

You stand in your blood-red wedding dress, staring at your reflection in the mirror. Baroness of Giedi Prime. Never in your wildest dreams would you have thought you would come this far, especially not when you boarded a Harkonnen ship in fear to escape the Bene Gesserit and your destiny. The destinies you were meant to fulfil... just a little differently than the Reverend Mothers would have wanted.

"The essence of the bride hunt is that she runs away from her groom. She is not supposed to be waiting in their chamber for him. I didn't expect you to make it so easy for me to catch you. This isn't like you." Feyd grumbles, suddenly finding himself behind you. You sigh as he wraps his arms around you, pressing your back against his chest. You take his hand in yours and squeeze, resting your head on his shoulder. You can't help but smile as your black and gold wedding rings reflect in the mirror. "You've ruined my fun, wife. And I should consider leaving the veil outside our bedroom door as an insult and your lack of faith in my abilities to find you."

"I didn't feel like running away from you today. You could say you've had your fair share of bride hunting over the years I've been here." He chuckles against your neck, placing a few small kisses there.

"So clever. My baroness. My wife." He purrs, marking your neck, releasing one of his hands from your grip, and removing the ruby necklace from around your neck.

"I have a gift for you." You tell him before he starts stripping you out of your wedding dress. Black diamonds woven into your dress create beautiful, embroidered red flowers, and the sleeves and neckline of the dress are decorated with lace, of course, also in the colour of blood. You think Feyd sacrificed a few slaves on purpose to show the seamstresses... the perfect colour for your wedding dress.

As beautiful as the dress was, you'd also rather have it lying on the floor. However, you need to tell him something important before he starts your wedding night.

"You have? I did not expect it. I have nothing in return for you. I can always…"

"You will not bring me the heads of your concubines on a gold platter. We agreed that they would become my servants and that would remain so." You interrupt him before he can propose it to you again. You watch him take a breath before he speaks again. You place your finger on his lips, silencing him, knowing full well what he wanted to say. "I don't want anyone's head. It's enough for me that you hung Atreides' head like some kind of decorative horn in the throne room. By the way, we'll have to take it off when the Emperor's delegation arrives."

"Again, you're spoiling my fun, wife." He grumbles, offended, but doesn't let go of you from his embrace. He rests his chin on your shoulder and looks at the two of you in the mirror. He plays with the bandage on your hand and smiles, remembering how he pierced your joined hands with a dagger a few hours ago. You were his. His baroness. His woman. "What do you have for me?" He asks, nuzzling your temple before pressing a kiss to your earlobe.

Your eyes meet in the mirror as you take his hands in yours. You gently slide them down from your collarbones, over your chest, and into your belly. You press his hands so he can feel the tiny pregnancy bump through the fabric of your dress.

You watch his reaction carefully, biting your lip as you try not to smile at his shocked look. His fingers press further against your stomach, as if to make sure what he feels is real. He tenses when he realises it's true.

"You are… how long?"

"A few weeks."

"A few weeks?" He asks, both surprised and offended that you kept him in the dark for so long. You frown at him and turn to look at him properly and not through the mirror.

"I wanted to make sure she is okay and grows properly."

"She?" You frown when you hear the disappointed tone with which he receives this information. You feel the anger boiling inside you, all the joy and excitement leaving you as you realise this isn't what he expected. That he expected you to give him the Kwisatz Haderach first.

"Yes... is that a problem?" You ask him, furious. He realises what it might have sounded like to you. He sighs, looking away from you and focusing on the wall behind you. He clenches his fists and takes a few breaths, trying to calm down and not think about how you could ever accuse him of discriminating against your unborn child based on gender.

"NO. Not at all. I don't care about the sex, as long as it's healthy. I just... thought we were going to have a boy first." You shudder slightly, remembering what Atreides had shown you on Arrakis—the future that would await you at the hands of your own son. But it was different then.

You did everything to prevent your future from being like this: you confessed your love to Feyd first, you made sure that you showed him the same devotion as he showed to you, and you made sure that your firstborn would be a daughter. However, there was still a small seed of fear in you. After all, Feyd killed his mother, so how could you be sure that, ironically, your potential son wouldn't do the same?

"What's wrong?" Feyd asks, cupping your chin between his two fingers. You flinch, but you don't move away from him.

You place your hand on his, holding it in a tight grip as you steady your breathing, not even noticing that you had found yourself in such a state of panic. You close your eyes and focus on your breathing, the beating of your heart, and the feeling of Feyd's hand in yours as you try to calm down.

"I… had… visions."

"Of course. Visions." He replies mockingly and removes his hand from your grip. He takes a few steps back, looking at you with reproach and bitterness in his blue eyes, which now resemble the ocean in a dangerous storm. "I thought that by defeating Atreides, we were done with visions, fate, destiny and especially with hiding important information from each other. But I guess I was wrong after all. Well, so do you. You can take the Bene Gesserit out of the order, but you can't take the order out of the Bene Gesserit."

"Feyd… it's not like that." You say this as you reach for him, but he pulls away from you before your fingertip can touch his skin. It hurts you that he thinks you have any connection to these witches, but you can't say you're surprised by his behaviour or that it's unreasonable. You just couldn't tell him what you saw without worrying about him getting paranoid.

"So what's it like?! You're not hiding anything from me? You don't make decisions completely by yourself? I understand that you want to be your own boss and make your own decisions, but you're my wife! What would you do if the roles were reversed? What if I hid from you what you hid from me?!"

"Feyd..." You try again, but this time he pulls away from you as if your touch would burn him. Before you can say anything, he storms out of the room, slamming the door behind him with such force that you're sure everyone in Giedi Prime heard it.

You sigh in defeat and lean your head against the wall. You hiss as the crown on your head prevents you from leaning back comfortably. You yank it out of your elaborately styled hairstyle and throw it across the room, not even flinching when the jewels shatter on the floor.

"Don't worry my sweethearts, everything will be fine. Dad's a little mad at me, but he's right. Even if he acts like an overgrown, spoiled little baby. I promise you that I will do everything to make us happy. All four of us." You whisper, wondering how the hell you're supposed to deal with your angry husband. This is not what your wedding night should be like. But was anything in the two of you's lives as it should have been?

"I'm having a little déjà vu, aren't you?" You ask, leaning on the doorframe of his private training room as his 'toy' falls dead under the blow he received from the furious man which now is your husband.

You're reminded of how you found him here in a similar condition a few months ago. Only then were you just his right-hand man, and he showed no... visible signs of interest in you. And now you were his wife and pregnant. And thousands of other things happened along the way.

"Leave." He growls at you and plunges his blade into the dead man several times. You sigh, throwing the towel you brought for him to the nearest chair and pulling out your own dagger.

"Fight with me." You request, looking at him carefully. He stops in his process of punching holes in the dead man's body, changing it into a sieve, and he looks at you in shock.

"You are with child." He responds emotionlessly, going back to abusing the prisoner's body.

"And? I haven't been pregnant that long that I can't kick your ass." You can see that this comment irritates him by the way he plunges the dagger deeper into the man's flesh. He clenches his jaw tightly, trying his hardest not to snap at you. After all, you were pregnant. He had to be gentle with you.

"Get out of here, woman. I won't fight you in this condition." He replies firmly, turning his back to you and walking to the table to pour himself some water.

You take a closer look at the muscles in his back; his body is painted red with the blood of the people he killed in his rampage. You purse your lips, shaking your head.

You sneak up on him and press the blade to his throat as he drinks. His Adam's apple bobs at the feeling of your cold steel against his neck. He turns his head to give you an annoyed look, as if you were a cat that had scratched him with its claws.

"Y/N..." He mutters menacingly, clenching his hands into fists. You lean in, lips brushing his earlobe and biting it after you whisper back:

"Feyd."

The low growl is all the warning you get. He pushes you away from him and reaches for his blade. You block his attack, your steels colliding with each other in a distinctive clanging sound. He doesn't move to attack first, watching you carefully and blocking your every attack as you try to leave a small scratch on his skin. You're furious that he's holding himself back and that he's making sure his blade doesn't even touch your skin, which is exposed by your regular combat gear.

You growl as you manage to break through his defences and stab him in the shoulder. He screams in anger and finally starts attacking you. You gasp, blocking his blows every now and then, and for obvious reasons, he doesn't hit you from the waist down. You're starting to get tired, but the adrenaline coursing through your veins and your own pride won't let you stop your fight. Feyd notices it, though. And he decides to end it.

He drops his blade and grabs your arms tightly. He pushes you against the wall, pinning you against it with his body. You both breathe quickly, staring wordlessly into each other's eyes as you press the dagger to his neck. His black blood drips from his shoulder onto the floor, the only sound in the empty room apart from your ragged breaths.

"I love you. Don't ever doubt that." You whisper and lean forward, capturing his lips in a furious kiss. His fingers dig into your arms even more, surely leaving small bruises in the shape of his fingertips as he uses his body to block you from making any movement.

You moan, pressing the dagger harder against his throat as he bites your lower lip. Feyd growls, and with a quick, confident movement, he grabs the gun from your hand and throws it across the room, unknowingly hitting the dead man's body.

You moan as his hands land on your hips. He lifts you up, rubbing his length against your pussy and biting your chin. You growl, digging your nail into his neck and wrapping your legs around his hips, gasping as you become wetter with each of his light thrusts into your clothed core.

"If I knew that all I had to do to get you like this was to argue with you, I would have done it the moment you chose that disgusting cake for our wedding."

"The cake was delicious, it's not my fault you're such a picky pain in the ass." You mumble back and bite into his neck. He moans softly, grabbing your hair in a tight grip.

"I quite like being a pain in your ass." He says this and grabs your hips. You wrap your arms around him and hold on to him as he carries you through the halls of the Harkonnen stronghold. You hide your face in the crook of his neck, trying to ignore the curious glances from the servants and passersby who look away as soon as they meet Feyd's hostile gaze. "I wish I had the opportunity to get you out of that dress. You looked beautiful at our wedding."

"I won't wear that dress again just because you decided to do your monthly sulk today. It took the maids an hour to put me in it." You grumble as he opens the door to your chambers.

"Do not worry honey. I'll undress you. And I will dress you up. And I'll undress you again. I have all the time in the world, my wife."

"And here I thought you'd rather spend your time differently than dressing me like a doll. More… active and enjoyable." You giggle as he places you on the bed at your remark. His fingers wander under your black linen shirt as he unhurriedly undresses you.

"Do you doubt that I have the time, skill, and stamina for both?" He proves his point by leaving a few hickeys on your neck. You smirk, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him closer to you. You wonder since when he has so much power over you (and you over him) that it only takes a few hours for you to reconcile.

Either you've come a long and successful way in developing your relationship, or you're simply getting too old for constant drama and want to finally have a moment of peace. But you weren't complaining if every little fight you had would end with you acting like idiots in love with each other again at the end of the day.

You sigh, drawing patterns on your husband's head. His arms tighten around you as you move, as if he's afraid you'll try to get away from him.

"As much as I like this, I must remind you that you have other responsibilities as a baron besides holding me."

"Possible. But holding my pregnant wife is my most important duty, to which I choose to devote myself completely today. Especially since you are getting closer to giving birth. The birth of twins, I would like to point out." He mumbles, pressing a kiss and rubbing his nose against your bump, and nuzzling into you.

"It's just childbirth, not a fight on Arrakis against the Fremen." You joke, rubbing his back. He purrs, snuggling even closer into you, making sure his arm wraps protectively around your belly.

"I'd be a lot more confident about your safety if you went to fight those rats instead."

"Said the man cuddled up to his pregnant wife." You try to ease his concern just a little. But you know your husband very well. Enough to know that he's stubborn as hell to give in so easily and forget about his fears.

"Does it bother you that I'm forming a bond with my unborn heirs?"

"No. Not at all."

"So let me continue, little witch, or I will silence you." You laugh, fully aware of his ways of shutting you up. He rolls his eyes at you, stands up, and kisses you, making you giggle even more. He breaks the kiss and presses his lips against your forehead before returning to his position as your protector.

"I'll be alright. We're okay. All three of us." You assure him and place your hand on his cheek, caressing it tenderly.

"I should punish you for hiding something so important from me again." He brings up the fact that… I missed telling him that yes, you are pregnant, but with twins. A girl, as you said, and a boy.

"That was months ago. Besides, there are many things I told you. Like my visions and everything. And I didn't get an award for it, so you can say we're even."

You defend yourself, and he just chuckles. A rare thing. But it seemed that with you and in the solitude of your shared quarters, (yes, he refused to have separate bedrooms. Something about how he had waited too long for you to spend even a night without you in his bed now anyway.) he did it a lot more often.

"You're way too smart, little witch. If you didn't love me, you would dethrone me in a week."

"Maybe even less." You banter with him with a smirk. You squeal as he tickles you, feigning outrage at your insult. You grab his hand in a tight grip and stop him.

You both freeze when your stomach suddenly bulges in one place. Feyd looks worriedly from you to your belly and hesitantly reaches up with one finger to stroke the small bulge. It disappears as quickly as he touches it. You giggle, realising that one of the kids must have stuck out its leg.

"I will teach them to fight. Both of them. They will be great leaders. One will get Arrakis and Lankiveil and the other will get Giedi Prime. They will support each other and fight for each other. They will get everything."

"Everything we didn't have."

"Yes." Feyd says thoughtfully, examining your belly. He presses his mouth there and cups your belly with his hands. You giggle when you suddenly get kicked by one of the twins, and you pull him towards you to hug you again.

"To be honest, I expected the first thing you would do was make them fight the snakes to prove their strength."

"I'm not my uncle."

"I know." You say and press a kiss to the top of his head. "You're… so much more. Someone much better than anyone ever wanted or thought you were. Never doubt it."

He nods and hugs you tighter. You sigh, happy with how close he is to you and the way he holds you. You could assure him that everything was fine, but the truth was that you were afraid of what the future would bring. If you were wrong... no. You couldn't think like that. You had Feyd by your side. And that was all that really mattered.

"We should name the girl Katerina."

"Katerina? Why?" You ask, turning your gaze towards him and frowning. The last thing you would expect him to do was to think about names for your children.

"I have a good feeling." He replies with a shrug and pulls you closer to him. You know him too well not to know he's up to something. However, you decide not to ask him about it. After all, each of you deserves to have your little secrets. Something you both learned to respect.

"Well, since you've already named the girl, I want to name the boy." He smiles and kisses the corner of your mouth at your request.

"And what do you want to name our son?"

"Feydor."

"Feydor? Why?"

"I have a good feeling." You answer him the same way. He rolls his eyes, but he doesn't ask you anything either. He hugs you tighter and presses his lips against your forehead. It's nice to have him so close to me and feel almost... normal.

Even if your normal was completely different from what was generally perceived as one.

"Your son got lost in the halls of Giedi Prime, the guards and harpies barely found him." Feyd grumbles as he enters the war room. You look up from the papers and watch as your husband slumps onto the sofa with a glass in his hand.

"My son?"

"Our son." He corrects himself, knowing full well better than to raise your ire with such a simple mistake.

"Are you blaming me? Need I remind you because of who Katerina almost killed the heir of Caladan last week because she was bragging about her fighting skills by actually fighting that boy in the arena?" You reproach him. He rolls his eyes and puts his half-full glass on the table next to him, not protesting or arguing with you. "I thought so. So don't blame me for teaching our son my tricks when you teach yours to our daughter."

"I can't believe how easily you turned me into an obedient husband." He complains, standing up and walking over to you. He rests his chin on your head and looks over the conquest plans you've made, glancing at the reports from the front that Rabban sent you.

"It wasn't that difficult at all." You banter with him and cup his chin. You kiss him, enjoying the softness of his lips. He cups your cheek in his hand and deepens it, moaning into your mouth.

You stop when you hear giggling coming from the secret corridor leading to the room. You raise an eyebrow and listen, realising that it's your twins trying to sneak up on you two.

"These kids are going to kill us both."

"We won't give up without a fight, my Baron." You whisper, standing up silently, making no sound as you two establish a 'plan of attack' on your children.

"Oh we certainly won't, my Baroness." He agrees with you with a smile. You answer him with your own, your teeth as black as his.

A moment later, the laughter of your two children echoes throughout the Harkonnen stronghold as you go on a little chase through the secret corridors.

The dagger that Feyd gave you hangs as a decoration in the war room. The steel is old but in good condition, although it is chipped in several places. Or rather, melted under the influence of the blood and wounds you inflicted. You never decided to repair it. It was a reminder of what you went through. All the way from being Feyd's right hand to the Baroness. His wife. The mothers of your two children.

Any visions of the future you had were good. Maybe not perfect, but what would your life be without a little bit of struggle? You and Feyd have proven that you can overcome any obstacle, enemy, or anything that could tear you apart. You were above fate and destiny.

And you will fight for your family with everything you have. Against every Bene Gesserit and everyone who wanted to hurt you or separate you. Being Feyd's right hand has prepared you perfectly for this.

So, this is the end. It feels strange to part with this story (it's the first time I feel this way). At first it was supposed to be just a oneshot, but thanks to your comments and involvement in the story, this miniseries was created. Thank you all for every comment, heart and all the love for this story. Thank you!!!!! (And I hope you will stay longer, for another mini-series with Feyd. ;D) Thank you so much again!! 😊🥰🩵🩵🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🖤🩵🩵🩵 ~ Kasagia

Taglist: (I REALLLLY hope that everyone who wanted to be here is here...😅 I;m sorry if I missed someone <3) @skymoonandstardust @prettybubblesintheair @thegabbyh @himesuedi @wo-ming-bai @beebeechaos @mamawiggers1980 @moonsoulk @avidreader73 @heartarianagran @dreamlandcreations @ancientbeing10 @lovereadingfanfic @jeansjoie @workof-a-rr-t @aixicl @ladyredstar1991 @evangelineimagine @hobobobo-fett56 @happyant3 @marsflys @aaaaaamond @kamcrazy123 @k1swass @yum-yahgurt @tyns13 @oh-you-mean-me @menari @tyns13 @vaf24 @dacreshoney @emrennoll-blog @tian-monique @slightlypossessed @celestialadrift @lauramooij05 @flaps200 @chixnugg22 @aaaaaamond @marvelfangirl04 @sw33tsnow @emeraldsgirl @imyourbubblegumpop @tempt-ress @harkonnin @k1swass @alana4610 @cloudroomblog @lotus-888 @lowlyloved @spoolsofgreenspoolsofblack @w3ird11 @kythefangirl25 @hobobobo-fett56 @nj452896 @oneandonlybbygrl @noirecatt @iloved1lfs0 @mamawiggers1980 @lololfixu @barnes70stark @obsessedvibee @aaaaaamond @workof-a-rr-t  @oneandonlybbygrl @alexa4040 @lowlyloved @toertchen @em-100 @caintheking @justarandomflowerchildofthenight @hrtifyeren @psychoffin @avidreader73

[luvhughes43]

the boy is mine | quinn hughes

[luvhughes43 masterlist🌙]

summary: yn meets quinn hughes and is instantly captivated by him, leading to him inspiring and starring in her new single "the boy is mine"

word count: 2.8k

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📍brighter days studios

liked by _quinnhughes, jackhughes, arianagrande, and 1 207 109 others

yourusername soooooon ;)

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user01 our soon??

liked by yourusername

user02 love you !!! cannot wait to see what youre working on

user03 you guys... quinn hughes liked this...

user04 NEW MUSIC?? OHH IM UP.

user05 i'm seated. the record store employees are scared and asking me to leave because "it's not even out yet" but im simply too seated.

6 MONTHS EARLIER

how can it be? you and me

might be meant to be, can't unseen it

but i don't wanna cause no scene

im usually so unproblematic

so independent, tell me why

'cause the boy is mine, mine

it was supposed to be for album promotion. sitting in the stands at rogers arena - right behind the home bench so the camera had easy access to see your dazzling face as the game unfolded in front of you. "he's kind of cute," your best friend courtney leans in towards you, pointing out one of the players only a few feet away from you behind the glass.

HUGHES. 43.

you study his side profile for a second - not giving him any real attention. you were here strictly on business and if people started suspecting you were eyeing somebody who was rumoured to be in a relationship (you checked) you knew that your publicist would call you in distress.

"i think hes taken," you whisper back, nervously eyeing the people sitting around you.

courtney nudges you with a small chuckle, "you checked?"

you playfully nudge her back, before settling back into your seat. to tell the truth, you were on a strict "no dating" rule ever since your ex boyfriend ran his mouth to page six detailing how you "cheated" on him with someone in a relationship. it wasn't a true story of course, but everyone flocked to the headlines anyway as an excuse to call you horrid names and say i just never liked her anyway!

hughes turns around then, and you feel your breath hitch as the speakers call out your name and your flushed face is plastered across the jumbotron. "you so like him," courtney laughs and you can't help but join her.

"portia's gonna kill me,"

"oh come on! a new relationship is a publicists dream... plus, i think he likes you. he literally cannot stop staring," you look to where courtney points and you see the defensemen skating towards centre ice - his eyes flicking towards you before he grounds himself in the game.

butterflies immediately fill up your chest and you know your screwed. the boy is mine.

something about him is made for somebody like me

baby, come over, come over

and God knows i'm trying, but theres no use in denying

you don’t know how she did it, but as soon as the final buzzer rang courtney was pulling you up and out of your seat and dragging you through the various corridors of the arena. “where are we going?” you ask, letting courtney pull you along.

“i’ve got connections babes,” she replies before coming to a halt in-front of a door. she knocks twice and a nice man wearing a suit opens the door slightly.

“you all good?” he turns his head and yells into the room.

“court…” your confusion is clear but before you can ask any questions the man swings the door open and your face to face with the canucks roster. “courtney!” you hiss lowly and she squeezes your hand tightly.

“you’re welcome…” she teases as she drops your hand and steps into the room.

as if your eyes were magnets, you lock eyes with quinn. his cheeks tinge with pink, and you quickly avert your gaze.

the man from before introduces you to the room - even though it’s not really necessary. your “scandals” have been plastered all over the news since your brief hiatus from music left everyone bored and in need of gossip.

"hughes - i mean uh quinn. i'm quinn," the man from the ice stutters as he reaches a hand out towards you. you slip your hand into his and with an awkward pause you two drop your hands.

"im y/n," you reply with a small smile and courtney silently slips away to greet the other players.

the boy is mine

i can't wait to try him

let's get intertwined

the stars they aligned

the boy is mine

watch me take my time

i cant believe my mind

the boy is divine

everything happened surprisingly fast. one minute you were sharing your number with quinn - against all rational judgement - and the next the two of you were taking any gaps in your schedules to spend time together. coffee dates turned into lunches, which turned into dinners, and then there were nights wrapped in each others sheets. it was all so crazy and fast - and it turned out that quinn wasn't seeing anybody after all.

please know this aint what i planned for

probably wouldnt bet a dime or my life on

there's gotta be a reason why

my girls, they always come through in a sticky situation

say, "it's fine"

happens all the time

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liked by _quinnhughes, courtney, sukiwaterhouse, and 786 712 others

yourusername 🌞

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courtney miss youu

user06 cuties !!!!

user07 quinns liking her posts again...

user08 he saw her at his game months ago and instantly folded... i respect that in a man

_quinnhughes

liked by yourusername, lhughes_06, _eliaspettersson, and 31 409 others

_quinnhughes Summa😎🌊

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trevorzegras what the dog doin

user09 now who's damn dog...

user10 TOULOUSE???

user11 ? who tf is toulouse

user12 it's yns dog!! istg she and quinn are dating

when you don't think the rumours are true but... your attention is stuck on your phone screen as your leaked song plays in the background of a tiktok. a pretty blonde girl lip syncs your song with annoyance and you watch the video a total of three times before clicking on the caption. "guess she fantasized about my bf too much and now hes hers lol... she's sick."

"do you know this girl?" you ask quinn and he lazily looks up from the pasta he's cooking. you mute the video as chills go up your spin. there is absolutely no way that quinn was seeing someone when the two of you first got together all those months ago.

"no why, is she your friend?" quinn replies easily.

you stare back at the video and all of the interactions it has. over two-hundred-thousand likes and all the comments are bashing you for something you didn't even do. you were so beyond tired of this situation and people using your name for attention. "no, i don't know her either," you respond distantly. you forward the video to your managers and hope they can rectify the situation.

"it's nothing," you dismiss your earlier question when you realize that quinn is still lingering on you. he reluctantly nods before turning his attention back to his pan. "thanks for coming here by the way - i know your schedules insane," quinn speaks up, mentioning the break in your studio time to come visit his lake house in michigan.

"thank you for inviting me," you set your phone down - completely committing to ignore the online drama and to focus on what's in front of you.

something about him was made for somebody like me

baby, come over, come over

and God knows i'm trying, but theres no use in denying

you had never spent so much time in one place. you were only supposed to be in vancouver for a few studio sessions with a producer native to the city - but ever since meeting quinn you became enamoured with the city. but it wasn't just vancouver either - you were also splitting your time between michigan as well. which, before meeting quinn was just a single stop on an 100-show tour.

but strangely despite everything, vancouver feels like home as you begin navigating your new album cycle and the words of 'wisdom' from your publicist portia who - you swore was only discouraging you from your relationship so she wouldnt have to stave off angry people on social media.

"i was thinking... gossip girl marathon and we order-in?" quinn suggests as soon as you step foot into his apartment. your mind settles as youre welcomed into your boyfriends space.

"have you ever watched gossip girl?" you ask, tossing your bag onto the couch before sliding up next to quinns spot in the kitchen. he had various online menus pulled up on his laptop, ready to order whatever you desired.

quinn hums, "i watched it with my mom when i was younger. i'm team blair,"

"team blair?" you gasp, "ohh you were made for me," you laugh lightly as you point towards one of the menus on his screen. "i'm so down to watch gossip girl,"

"do you wanna go set up the tv while i order the food?" he asks and you kiss him on the cheek before making your way into his living room.

the boy is mine

i can't wait to try him

let's get intertwined

the stars they aligned

the boy is mine

watch me take my time

i cant believe my mind

the boy is divine

"i think we should riff off 'fantasize'," you speak to your music producer - max - finally wanting to take back the energy from your leaked song. you were tired, and with quinn away on pre-season hockey duties you were bored. "something more sophisticated," you explain as you click through various samples and instrumentals. you finally land on one half-finished record and the lyrics immediately come to you.

"the boy is mine..." you hum along to the empty track as you pull out your notes app. "i can't wait to try him-" you continue, rapidly noting lyrics in your app.

by the end of your studio session the basic structure of the song was completed and you knew you had a hit on your hands.

and i know it's simply meant to be

and i, take full accountability for all these years

promise you i'm not usually

like this, shit, its like news to me

but i can't ignore my heart, boy

"the boy is mine, i can't wait to try him..." you sing quietly to yourself as you search pinterest for music video inspiration. "let's get intertwined... the stars they aligned..." quinns smirk immediately presses against your soft shoulder. he trails light kisses across your shoulder blade and up to your neck, silently begging you to continue singing your newest song.

"the boy is mineee..." his soft lips are ticklish against your skin but you can't help but lean into his grasp.

"i love when you sing," he mumbles and you tilt your head to rest against his. halle berry's cat woman buzzes in the background but neither of you are paying the movie any attention.

you hum, "oh yeah?"

he kisses your shoulder again and you fix your gaze back onto your laptop screen before lightly closing it and setting it to the side. "i still don't know what i'm going to do about the music video,"

quinn lays back in bed and allows his gaze to fixate on the tv. "what about catwoman? i'd bet you'd look good in a cat suit" he teases. you knew he wasn't being entirely serious but halle berry easily captures your attention as she dazzles on screen in her catsuit.

"the boy is mine," you hum lightly, completely enticed with quinns idea for your music video.

i can't wait to try him

lets get intertwined

the stars, they aligned

the boy is mine

watch me take my time

i can't believe my mind

the boy is divine

boy is mine

the male lead for the boy is mine video is a no-show. multiple calls to his personal phone, calls and emails to his managers and agency, everything is left unanswered.

quinn🤍🌙: i'm out front. i got your favourite drink

you sigh with relief as you quickly excuse yourself from the upset mass of production staff and your cinematographer.

"hey, what's wrong?" your boyfriend of almost a year asks with concern etched across his features. you blink slowly and all your frustrations manifests into tears.

"the shoot is going so bad," you breathe heavily, "and we're so behind schedule,"

quinn wipes away your fallen tears with his thumb. "why what's happening?"

"the male lead hasn't shown up yet and he and agency aren't answering our calls," you lean against quinn and he easily wraps a hand around your waist. "i've filmed most of my solo shots but i know the crew is getting upset and i don't know what to do. we're trying to find a replacement but-"

"i'll do it," quinn says quietly and measuredly.

"what?" you blink and pull away from him slightly. quinn passes you your drink and you allow the coolness of the cup to soothe some of your nerves.

"i'll be in the video" he repeats. "if you want- i mean i don't want to overstep or-"

you lightly tap quinns hand with your own. "i'd love if you were in the video," you say softly, nerves completely dissipating with his comfort and the solution to your problem. "thank you," you kiss his cheek.

less than an hour later quinn was fitted in his costume and was debriefed on the scenes he would be filming.

─── ➤ 📹

you left quinn to film his presidential speech sequence so that you could get ready to film the catsuit portion of the video. your dress was tight and your brown wig made you take on your pop-girl persona that you'd been sheltering ever since the infidelity allegations ruined your reputation.

"oh you look so good," quinn wanders up to you as soon as you step onto the apartment set. he eyes your latex dress before smoothing a hand down your side gently. "i was right about the outfit," he jokes easily and you lean against his side while the crew finishes marking the next scene.

"you don't look too bad yourself," you blush under the weight of his gaze. you trail one of your hands up the front of his chest before realizing where the two of you were. not like it would be a crime to ogle your boyfriend on your music video set... but still.

"how was filming your speech?" you ask, pulling away from him slowly.

"only forgot my lines once!" quinn jokes with a laugh, to which you immediately join in on.

"that's my boy!"

"okay, y/n - quinn, we're ready for you two now," your lovely director calls out across the set.

PRESENT DAY

yourusername

liked by _quinnhughes, bradytkachuk, arianagrande, and 6.7M others

yourusername "the boy is mine" is out now!!🐈‍⬛🐈‍⬛ starring my boy _quinnhughes, featuring brandy & monicadenise !!!!🥹🥹🫶 and directed by the amazing christhedirector

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christhedirector the best is yet to come!🎬

_quinnhughes had the best time with you!❤️

arianagrande obsessed

jackhughes can't believe you let him on set

canucks the collab we didnt know we needed!🐈‍⬛💙

user13 QUINN???? HUGHES????

user14 the most insane hard launch wtf?

user15 the boy may be yours but i need him to be MINE!

user16 waittt this is the guy from the hockey game all those months ago??? wow

user17 mv was so good i started hallucinating

user18 loveeee you!!! this song and mv is literally so good!

_quinnhughes

liked by yourusername, lhughes_06, _eliaspettersson, and 361 043 others

_quinnhughes "the boy is mine" by the amazing yourusername is out everywhere now!❤️

tagged: yourusername

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lhughes_06 can't believe this exists

_eliaspettersson 📸📸

trevorzegras damnnnn you really weren't lying

_quinnhughes ?

bboeser looking good💯

user19 WHAT

user20 me next pls

user21 so the rumours were true this whole time👀

user22 so did she cheat or not like...

user23 plss he wasnt even following that tiktok girl it was definitely a lie for views lmao.

user24 soooo their relationship is confirmed ?

user25 hughes girlies lost

user26 OHHH I WON I LOVE U BOTH SM!!

user27 this mv has me feeling things hold on...

yourusername

liked by _quinnhughes, madisonbeer, jackhughes, and 5.7M others

yourusername last photo dump i promiseeee !!! this project has been an absolute dream and i'm so happy that it's finally yours after all these months! i can't wait for u guys to see what else we've been working on.. ;)

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_quinnhughes the most talented♥️

user28 TRUE LOVE?? oh this quinn stuff is serious huh...

user29 i get it

user30 loveee you the most

THE END <3

-

-

-

[balletfilmss]

STARTED OUT WITH A KISS, HOW DID IT END UP LIKE THIS?

✸ pairing: rockstar! percy jackson x ballerina! reader

✸ synopsis: after months of sneaking around behind the media’s backs, you and your boyfriend make your relationship public!

✸ warnings: not proofread. like, at all.

✸ notes: hey so im alive btw…. so here’s pt.2 to could you make it any more obvious?

“are you sure you want to do this?”

you asked the question for the millionth time, finger hovering over the bright blue button on your phone screen, identical to the one percy was eager to press.

the two of you sat together with phones in hand, seconds away from making instagram posts that would launch your relationship to the public after months of sneaking around. even though you’d already been caught once or twice…

“sweetheart, how many times do i have to tell you yes until you believe me?” percy chuckled, looking at you with those kind eyes of his.

this was his idea, for crying out loud. you knew that the media would eat it right up, with the two of you confirming their month-long suspicions and dating rumors.

that being said, you also knew that there’d be a lot more backlash from his fans than yours. who cares if a popular ballerina got a boyfriend, right?

but a eligible, hot, bachelor rockstar that had millions of fangirls all around the world?

oh, you were totally in for it.

one of the great things about percy was that he seemed to not only have great musical talent, but also the ability to read your mind.

“look, i can’t promise you that making everything public will be easy, though i think not having to sneak around definitely will,” a laugh out of both him and you. “but what i can promise is that whatever happens, we’ll deal with it together.”

that paired with a reassuring squeeze to your leg drew a smile right onto your face. you took a deep breath, reassured that no matter what happened, you still had him.

“okay,” you nodded, skimming over your Instagram caption one last time. “i’m ready.”

“on the count of three?” percy asked, holding his phone directly beside yours.

“one…”

“two…”

“three.”

together, you clicked post and watched as the upload line chased the edge of the screen until finally, it was public. everything was public.

dropping his phone on the couch, percy wrapped his arms around your abdomen and squeezed, pulling you from the cushions until you landed in his lap.

with a shriek of surprise followed by a fit of laughter from you both, you held his face in your hands, grinning at it another like two idiots in love, which you were.

“alright, swan lake,” he smiled, face close to yours. “everything just changed.”

“i don’t think so, not really,” you shrugged. “i’m still me. we’re still us. only difference is now we don’t have to go sneaking down alleys to avoid people.”

“always a bright side with you,” your boyfriend swooned at the mere sight and sound of you, his eyes filled with nothing but adoration and love. you could’ve sworn you saw hearts in his eyes.

“well, you are mr. brightside.”

that reference to one of his songs was all it took. percy leaned back into the couch cushions, pulled you with him, and kissed you so good that it didn’t matter what anyone commented on social media.

instagram!!

…now playing: last call — greek symphony

officially.yn: yeah, my boyfriend’s pretty cool 🤍🎸

tagged: impercyjacks

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impercyjacks: wow who’s that hottie in the last picture?? 😍

╰┈➤ officially.yn: idk, some musician 🤷‍♀️

its.piper.mclean: you big fucking liar, I KNEW IT

╰┈➤ officially.yn: I’M SORRY PIPES, I PROMISE I WANTED TO TELL YOU

╰┈➤ its.piper.mclean: I DON’T BELIEVE YOU!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS 😭😭 breaking up with you IMMEDIATELY, yn ln

╰┈➤ officially.yn: NO, piper bby don’t do this 😔

╰┈➤ impercyjacks: i am RIGHT here

user45: YL LN AND PERCY JACKSON WEREN’T ON MY 2024 BINGO CARD BUT IM SO HERE FOR IT

username: THE LDR CAPTION OMFG

╰┈➤ user72: and HIS BAND’S song playing???

╰┈➤ username: I DIDNT EVEN NOTICE THST OMG YOURE SO RIGHT

the.leovaldez: i KNEW i wasn’t crazy

╰┈➤ impercyjacks: bffr. you didn’t know SHIT

╰┈➤ the.leovaldez: I KNEW YOU WERE SNEAKING AROUND W SOMEONE

╰┈➤ jasegrace: leo. frank’s deaf cat knew he was sneaking around with someone.

╰┈➤ frankzhang: you leave maisie out of this.

username: THE COUPLE OF THE CENTURY OMFG

user289: this is THE hard launch of all hard launches

╰┈➤ user: but was this REALLY the launch, or was it all those tabloid articles 👀👀

impercyjacks: spoiler alert: she didn’t break my heart & i did, in fact, see her again ;)

╰┈➤ user: OMFG LAST CALL IS ABOUT YN???

╰┈➤ username: SHUT THE FRONT DOOR

impercyjacks: love you, swan lake 🤍

…now playing: paparazzi — lady gaga

impercyjacks: but i’m not as cool as her 🩷🩰

tagged: officially.yn

view all comments

officially.yn: last pic was not necessary.

╰┈➤ impercyjacks: but you look so cute :((

username: HE HAS A GF?? MY LIFE IS ABSOLUTELY OVER

╰┈➤ user293: girl get a grip….

╰┈➤ user: okay but like the gf is YN LN, it’s okay

the.leovaldez: yeah and guess who knew first? ME

╰┈➤ impercyjacks: actually…that was jason

╰┈➤ the.leovaldez: …. GUESS WHO KNEW SECOND?? ME 🗣️🗣️

username: girls, we lost him 😔

jasegrace: thank god, im sick of keeping your secret

╰┈➤ officially.yn: didn’t you tell us once that it felt like gossip girl?

╰┈➤ jasegrace: THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO STAY BW THE THREE OF US

username: YN LN AND PERCY JACKSON ONFG COUPLE OF THE YEAR

its.piper.mclean: im forwarding every last piece of media paper work to you.

╰┈➤ impercyjacks: send it on over 🫡

╰┈➤ its.piper.mclean: YOURE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE FUCKIN HAPPY ABOUT IT

user29: majority of the pictures just being her 🥹

╰┈➤ fan9: and the fact that the FIRST one’s her, so she’s on his feed now

username: isn’t yn ln like…a terrible dancer? she’s so overrated fr

╰┈➤ impercyjacks: shouldn’t you like….get a fucking life??

╰┈➤ user28: OH GAH DAMN

╰┈➤ fan28: GAGGED THEM FR

╰┈➤ user18: OHHHH HE DOESNT PLAY WHEN IT COMES TO HIS WOMEN

officially.yn: i love you so big, rockstar ♥️

[cheenapri]

Yandere Illumi Analysis

AN: I wrote this on a whim so I didn't really proofread or check for plotholes lmao but enjoy anyway

Illumi didn’t think much of you the first time he saw you, it was as if you weren’t even there. Strangely enough, he’s caught several more sightings of you over the course of two months, each time he still didn’t think much of you. That was until he realized he didn’t really have any business in that area to begin with as his mission had already been completed and he’d already been paid. He seemed to unknowingly home you out from time to time, his slight glances turning into full-on stares as he watched you from the shadows. 

You had piqued his interest. After a few days of watching you, Illumi questioned himself. He was confused as to why he was focusing so much of his attention on someone so insignificant.

He thought that maybe you were a nen user using your powers on him and made plans to quickly dispose of you. Fortunately for you, he failed to do so. For the first time in his life, Illumi had hesitated to kill someone. A singular gold needle lay ready in his hand yet he was unable to bring himself to launch it at your skull. 

Multiple attempts were made, all with you being completely oblivious, before he discovered that you weren’t even a nen user and that he was hesitant on his own unconscious volition.

Illumi had an inner crisis before he would accept his ineffable feelings towards you. He saw something in you he couldn’t describe but knew he liked, and wanted to figure out what it was. 

He spent whatever free time he had just observing you — from afar, of course, he’s a little shy. Sometimes he would invite himself into your house to snoop through your things while you’re gone. If you have a loudmouth pet, he’ll be sure to temporarily subdue it. Killing it would be the more convenient option but it would alarm you to see your beloved pet lying in a pool of blood upon returning home. 

On the night he chooses to bring you to the estate for further inspection, he attempts to lure you using taxis. He may or may not have destroyed your car’s engine to force you to walk to work. When his attempts to lure you fail, he gets fed up with your constant defiance and police calls and opts to physically bring you back himself, there’s only so many times he can deal with the police without causing chaos. 

You look so beautiful when you sleep.

He’s unsure how to go about dealing with you once you’re locked away in the estate, he just throws your unconscious body on the bed and stares at you until you wake up. He keeps staring once you wake up too, only saying something when you start screaming and freaking out. His words aren’t very comforting, though.

He had to teach you manners since you’re being very rude. Once you’re quiet, he’ll proceed to not explain anything to you but rather stand over you and ask if you’re hungry. You say no and he leaves you alone and without food for a couple of days.

He’s a very busy man so expect him to be gone for days or even weeks at a time. This doesn’t mean you’re free to do whatever you want, however, as Illumi has assigned a skilled butler to watch over you while he’s gone. They are his eyes and ears so make sure you don’t do anything foolish less they tattle on you. Though you have a somewhat neutral relationship with your assigned butler, you can’t bring yourself to fully trust or confide in them.

Though you hate it here, you’d prefer your time alone over your captor’s company as Illumi was awful to be around. Whether he was staring at you from across the room or correcting your behavior, it was all awful. All time spent “hanging out” with him consists of him sitting away from you, sometimes sitting closer depending on his mood, and silently staring. Sometimes an attempt at a conversation was made on your end as you wanted to know exactly what was going on and why he’d brought you here. You were asking too many questions about the same thing; it was pissing him off.

He rarely talks about himself if it isn’t assassin-related and you don’t like him enough to ask. He does have a habit of talking about the things he’s learned about you before bringing you to the estate rather unprompted. He has zero self awareness. You got him talking one time and had to figure out through context clues and your own ideas that he had a “romantic” interest in you. 

Illumi is not the talkative type but if he wants to hear your voice, he’ll start conversations. The conversations usually consist of him asking you really pointless questions and encouraging you to explain your answer in great detail no matter how dry it is. 

If you’re good while he’s gone, he may bring you back a gift. If you accept with enthusiasm, feigned or not, he’ll be internally delighted. If you decline the gift or refuse to open it, Illumi will take it as an act of defiance.

May the punishment fit the crime. Illumi will not hesitate to nip any unsavory behaviors right in the bud in the hopes of molding you faster. If you were to act out physically, expect a dislocated or broken limb. Kicking equals a broken leg, and punching equals a broken arm whereas pushing him away, no matter how gently, equals a dislocated wrist or two. Verbal crimes like talking about your past life or swearing at him are punishable by strangulation. Illumi will not tolerate such disrespect. He doesn’t let go after a few seconds either, his grip is tight until you pass out. The more severe it is, the less likely you are to become a repeat offender, right…? You definitely won’t be able to curse at him now or talk at all really. All other acts of defiance are punishable by whatever he sees fit.

He never comforts you after a punishment. It’s your fault anyway, you shouldn’t have tried to hit him or cursed at him. Honestly, what did you expect? He tends to forget the punishment had even occurred during his next visit with you and expects you to do the same.

Though your newer assigned butler has a healing ability, Illumi rarely allows its use. 

Illumi can sometimes be strangely passionate. Even through his sheer brutality and emptiness, there are times when you can sense the slightest sliver of humanity within him. Mainly on days when he’s particularly needy for your attention. 

He sometimes visits at odd hours of the night, waking you so he can talk about his day. He doesn’t know it, but he’s using you as an emotional outlet. You’re expected to listen to every single word that comes out of his mouth and engage with him. You feel a bit intimidated since he’s sitting so close to you on the edge of the bed. 

He doesn’t really touch you unless to punish you so you tend to flinch when he moves too fast. He doesn’t mind this at first.

Despite holding you captive for months now, Illumi still hadn’t figured out what about you was attractive to him. Eventually, he’d accept that he’d never figure it out and you’d always be a mystery. He begins seeing you as his spouse from this point forward.

Though he wanted to take the relationship slowly to ease you into your new life, you didn’t wish to accept your untold role as his spouse, causing everything to sit at a standstill. As more time passes, he becomes impatient for your cooperation. He doesn't directly say it but it’s made VERY clear that he demands your affections. He’s giving you more attention than usual, how else can he make it clearer?

One day while returning home from a mission, he noticed a couple on an outing. They looked so happy together. Illumi didn’t think much of it at the time but as days turned into weeks, his mind began replaying the scene over and over, replacing the couple with you and him. He concludes that you’re probably being spiteful because he isn’t spending enough time with you. If you wanted more attention from him, why didn’t you just ask?

So it’s been decided, he’ll take you with him on a mission so you can watch him kill people. You would be a liability, sure, but you’d see it as a sign that he loves you, right? His dad disagreed with the idea when Illumi brought it up to him, telling him that something like that would be too intense for someone like you. Queue Silva’s and Illumi’s first (?) father and son chat. Illumi was surprisingly receptive to Silva’s ideas and dropped his original plan.

Queue intensive date planning for a few months. Of course, he made sure not to let you hear anything about it as it’ll be a super special surprise that’s going to blow your mind and make you accept your place at his side.

He really showed just how much he knew about you, making sure nothing you wouldn’t enjoy found its way into his intricate plans. 

Of course, it couldn’t be a normal date out in public, what if someone tried to hurt you? He would kill them, yes, but the mood would’ve already been ruined at that point so he thought it best to rent out a few places and completely isolate you.

Now that preparations were complete, all that was left was to pick you up — Illumi was rather eager to get this date started.

[hugz4hoon]

stargazing (pt.2) - s.j.y.

read part one here!

summary — you finally come to the conclusion that you need to get over your one sided feelings.

pairing — best friend!jake x fem!reader

genre — fluff and angst

wc — 2.3k

a/n — she's here! it ended up taking longer than i thought because i absolutely hated my first draft LOL so i completely scratched it and restarted it with a new plot hehe but i really hope u guys like this one!!!

It’s been two weeks since you last spoke with Jake. The last time you saw him was when he left you, heartbroken on your rooftop. Since then, Jake has regretted not telling you how he feels that night. The only reason he hasn’t called or texted you is because he’s embarrassed about how he acted, and he doesn’t know what to say to you. Meanwhile, you’ve been forcing yourself to get over him by distracting yourself everyday. It’s obvious he’s been avoiding you; it’s definitely time to move on.

You were at the mall with your friends when you saw Jake walking in your direction. It was a bit nerve wracking—you haven’t seen him for two weeks, and suddenly, you didn’t know how to act around him anymore. But, that didn’t seem to be a problem, because when you made eye contact with him, his eyes widened as if he had seen a ghost. The second Jake saw you, he immediately turned to walk in the opposite direction. And that’s when you saw who he was with… a girl that you’ve never seen before? You watched their backs as they left your eyeline.

Your heart ached with a newfound heaviness. You felt as if your whole world was crumbling down. Who was that? Does he hate me so much that he can’t even look at me? Did he really find a new best friend in the span of two weeks? Or even, a girlfriend? Your mind was going haywire, and your distress definitely showed on your face.

One of your friend’s voices snapped you out of your daze.

“Y/N, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just feeling a little tired right now. I think I should head home,” you half heartedly smiled at them. You had to get out of there. If you stayed in the busy environment for any longer, you’re sure you would’ve passed out. Shrugging off your friends’ demands and questions asking whether you wanted company, you called a taxi and headed home.

--

As soon as you got home, you took a hot shower to collect your thoughts. You didn’t want to be heartbroken over Jake because that would ruin all the progress you’ve made in getting over him. Instead, you decided to take a nap to try to sleep it off.

When you woke up, it was 6pm; you ended up sleeping for around three hours. You wake up to the vibrations erupting from your phone. Before you could see who was calling, the call ended. That’s when you saw the many missed calls adorning your notification center. There are over a dozen missed calls from… Jake? You keep scrolling to find Jake’s text messages to you from two hours ago.

jakey <3: can we talk

jakey <3: i shouldn’t have walked away from u

jakey <3: i miss u

Now you're pissed. Saying he misses you right after ignoring you for two weeks, and walking away from you without so much as a quick hello at the mall, is confusing as hell. Not only is it confusing, but it’s also rage inducing. With anger clouding your mind, you sharply respond to his messages instead of calling him back.

y/n: that’s so stupid

y/n: you say all that but your actions say otherwise

He calls you immediately the second you text him back, but you cannot be bothered to pick up.

[missed call from “jakey <3”]

jakey <3: pick up ur phone y/n

y/n: no. i don’t wanna hear it jake

y/n: i’m done

jakey <3: done? what do u mean by that

jakey <3: y/n please just call me we need to talk

jakey <3: y/n

At this point, you’re so annoyed with him that everything he says pisses you off. You stop responding when you start to feel as if steam is blowing out of your ears, before your head pops off due to built up pressure. As you start to distract yourself by doom scrolling through social media, you get another notification from Jake.

jakey <3: open ur door

Sure enough, he’s at your house now. You ignore the message and continue scrolling, hoping that after a couple of minutes, he’ll leave. About five minutes pass by, when you hear a tap on your window. You jump at the noise, and your gaze immediately turns to where the sound came from. There on the tree branch sits Jake, in all his boyish charm, as he sports that damn quirky and apologetic smile again. Unfortunately for him, this is the first time it doesn’t work in his favour. Honestly, you still don’t want to let him in, but it’s a particularly windy day, and despite your anger, you don’t want him to hurt himself.

With a stern expression plastered on your face, you unlock the window and turn right back to your bed. He watches with sorrowful eyes as you sit on your bed, realizing in his haste to see you, he forgot to prepare an apology.

He hesitantly pulls open the window and enters your room. After closing the window, he awkwardly stands there as he thinks of how to approach the situation. You, on the other hand, are staring daggers into his eyes.

“So, are you going to tell me what you’re doing here?” Jake flinches at the clear irritation in your tone. This is the first time you’ve ever been mad at him, and he doesn’t know how to handle it. He hates it. He hates that he’s the reason behind your disdain. All he wants is to see your beautiful smile again.

He shuffles his feet clumsily as he searches for the right words. “I’m here to atone.” He announces with an uncertain voice. Hm, maybe that wasn’t the way to start off, he thinks as he sees your face change into an expression of disconcert.

Your jaw falls open at his statement. What kind of stupid opening is that? “Jake, if you're not going to be serious, I don’t want to hear it,” you firmly state, while getting up to leave your room.

“No, wait, let me finish!” he spews out before you can leave, which gets you to stop in your tracks. “Sorry, I know that wasn’t the best thing to say, but it’s because I don’t know how to address this,” he mumbles.

“Why? I don’t understand, Jake. We used to be able to talk about anything. You used to tell me everything, what happened? I feel like I’m going insane right now.” Your eyes start to water from the vulnerability you’re showing him.

Jake’s eyes soften after hearing your words. He never meant to make you feel this way, in fact, this is the opposite of what he wanted. The reason he didn’t reach out to you was because he was terrified. Terrified of ruining the friendship you two had built over the years. Jake had spent countless nights thinking about you, replaying moments in his mind, and imagining what could be. He wanted to tell you the truth, but he was paralyzed by the fear of your rejection.

What if you didn’t feel the same way? What if confessing his feelings meant losing you forever?

Jake walks over to you and pulls you down to sit on the bed with him, his expression filled with a mix of desperation and vulnerability. His eyes gaze down at your teary ones as he starts to speak in the most serious tone you’ve ever heard from him. “Y/N, the last thing I wanted to do was confuse you.”

“Well, you are confusing me!” Although you want to hear him out, you can’t help but be angry while thinking about his previous immature actions. One thought in particular crosses your mind. “Who was she?” You whisper as you break eye contact with him, prepared for the worst.

Jake takes a deep breath, knowing he needs to explain everything to you. “The girl you saw me with at the mall,” he begins, his voice steadying, “she's not what you think.”

You raise an eyebrow, still feeling a twinge of uncertainty. "Then who is she?"

"She's a friend from one of my classes.” Jake explains, running a hand through his hair. She asked for help with a project she's working on, and we decided to grab some coffee and discuss it. That’s all it was. I promise."

You feel a wave of relief, but there’s still a lingering doubt. “Why did you walk away when you saw me?”

Jake sighs, his shoulders slumping slightly. “When I saw you, I freaked out. I didn’t know how to face you after everything. I thought you might think she was someone important to me, and I didn’t want to hurt you more than I already had. But running away just made things worse.”

You take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions inside you. "You could have just told me, Jake. I spent these two weeks thinking you hated me or something."

Jake's face softens even more, his eyes pleading. “I'm so sorry, Y/N. I never wanted you to feel that way. To be honest, I was just really scared of losing you. But I've realized that keeping my feelings from you was the worst thing I could have done.”

Your heart races at his words, relief and apprehension filling your chest. "And what are those feelings, Jake? What have you been so afraid to tell me?"

Jake takes a breath, finally ready to tell you what he’s wanted to say for years. It’s now or never. “Y/N, I’m in love with you, and I have been for years. I was scared to tell you because I didn’t know how you would react, and the last thing I wanted was to lose you.” His heart races as the precious words fall from his lips.

You gasp at his sudden confession. You’ve been waiting for this for years and years, and as it’s finally happened, you feel your heart burst with excitement and joy. However, you still feel a fair amount of hesitancy to accept his feelings due to his previous actions.

He watches your face, searching your eyes for an answer. “Jake, I… I’ve waited so long to hear you say that,” his eyebrows furrowed in confusion at the uncertainty in your voice. “But do you understand how much you hurt me by ignoring me for so long?” Your voice trembles with anger and sadness. “How am I supposed to know that you won’t do that if we get into another situation like this? I don’t ever want to go through that again.”

Jake’s eyes fill with regret. “I know, Y/N. I was such an idiot. I thought staying away would somehow protect our friendship, but all I did was make things worse.” He takes a hold of your hands and kneels between your legs, while looking up at you with pleading eyes. “Please, Y/N, I’m so, so sorry. I can’t lose you, I don’t know what I would do with you.”

Your lips part in shock and overwhelm as you can sense the sincerity in his words as a couple of tears slip from your eyes. “Okay, Jake. I believe you. And actually, I’ve loved you for years too. I love you so, so much. But you need to promise me that you’ll never do that again, okay? We need to be there for each other, always.”

Jake’s eyes light up with elation. Under this light, he looks a bit like an excited puppy. How adorable, you think to yourself. “I know, I promise I’ll never do anything like that again. I love you, Y/N. I want to be with you.”

Now that you’re feeling more secure in your relationship with Jake, you finally feel at ease. With him, everything is easy and comfortable. With him, you feel at home. “Well, of course you do. I know I’m hard to resist,” you tease. Jake smiles up at you, happy that you’re back to your normal, witty self. “Yeah, imagine how hard it was for me to hide it for so long,” he replies with a grin.

“Mm, yeah, must’ve been pretty tough,” you nod sarcastically as you gently pull him up by his chin. He beams at you before cupping your face and bringing it closer to him until your lips meet in a tender, soft kiss. You both feel fireworks as your mouths rhythmically move together in waves of passion. The kiss is filled with years of unspoken feelings and promises of a future together.

When you finally pull apart, the room is filled with nothing but sounds of heavy breathing. Jake then rests his forehead against yours. “I love you, Y/N. I won’t let you down again.”

You smile, feeling a surge of warmth spread through your chest. “I love you too, Jake. Just don’t keep me in the dark anymore, okay?”

Jake nods, his eyes shining with love. “Never again. From now on, no more secrets.”

You two lay back on the bed, and Jake pulls you close to his body, letting you rest your head on his chest. You talk late into the night, much like you’ve always done before, the difference being instead of best friends, it’s now a conversation between a boyfriend and a girlfriend. This is all you’ve ever wanted and more.

The sun begins to rise again, painting the sky in shades of pink and gold, just like that night on the rooftop. But this time, there are no unspoken words or missed opportunities. Just the promise of a new beginning for you and Jake, together.

tags: @breadlover01 @en-chantedtomeetyou @14-hibiscus

[tonguepiercedanyway75]

I got me a concept (if you’re okay with it and if not that’s okay too)

Girlie escapes a toxic household and Matty comforts her and pulls her to sleep

I’m totally okay with it, hope it’s like you imagined

content warning: toxic household, yelling, reader gets hit, sweet matty

You’re sitting in your room, headphones in your ear because you’re not able to listen to what’s going on downstairs anymore. You’re staring at the go-to back you’ve already packed months ago in case something like this happens.

The words won’t leave your head. “You’re a little ungrateful bitch”, “what the fuck is wrong with you?” “Is there anything you can do?” “I should’ve never had you in the first place.”

Tears are streaming down your face, whether you want them to or not. Maybe you have a lack of understanding of why your own parents hate you so much, why you deserve this.

“You say another word and I’ll hit you twice as hard.”

Of course you didn’t say anything else, the sting in your face was already enough of a ‘lesson.’ You don’t even know what you did, you had a long day, came home and were faced with unnecessary confrontation immediately.

“I don’t want to see your face again tonight, you hear me?” You regret not answering him because the next hit to your face was indeed harder. It feels like you’re bleeding, but from experience you know that it’s just going to be a black eye or a red print. “You answer me when I talk to you.”

It’s hard to be in a place that has never been your home. It’s your house, that you live in, but instead of it filled with love and happiness, it’s filled with hatred and anger. You can’t deal with this any longer.

You wait until it’s dark outside and until you’re sure that your parents are asleep, when you climb out of your window with your bag. You take a last look inside your cold, empty room before deciding that you will not miss it anyway.

You take your bike from the garage as quietly as possible to go to the only place where you know you’ll be okay. Matty’s. Matty knows how your family is and being your best friend he offered you multiple times that you can stay over at anytime but of course your parents would never allow.

On their good days you lied to them and asked them if you could stay over at your friends house, female of course. That’s the only way you could spend time with Matty. It’s rarely that they allowed you, but one night at Matty’s house brought you enough joy for one month at your terrible house.

At least you don’t have to worry about his parents because he has his own place. That’s where you are right now.

Your whole body is shaking as you lean the bike against the wall, question if it was a good idea to bother Matty at this late hour.

Your cloudy thoughts and bad memories take over your physical body. It feels like they possess you. You start trembling and panting. The world feels like it's ending and collapsing. Your chest slowly brews into a tremendous amount of pain, feeling like you're having a heart attack, and you feel like you can't catch your breath. Everything seems like it's closing in on you, and you feel like you're dying.

“Oh god,” you knock on his door multiple times. You are still freaking out and panicking and every second Matty doesn't answer the door you panic even more.

‘Please just be there’

The door swings open there he is. In a superman shirt and black sweatpants. And you’re there. A crying mess with a red face and a laceration over your eyebrow, sure that there is a handprint very visible on your cheek.

“Hey, hey, love, what happened?” He asks softly, guiding you inside away from the cold, closing the door.

He knows exactly what happened so he doesn’t push it. “Fuck, darling.”

You can’t answer him right now, struggling to breathe. „here, give me this.“ He takes your bag from your hands and sets it on the floor.

"I- I- I. I can't. I can't. Matty-" you pant. You run your hands through your hair uncontrollably, and you are out of breath. You don’t know what to do. Matty then gets closer to you.

“It’s okay, baby, you’re okay, breathe.”

"I- I can't. Matty, I can't bre- breathe," you whimper, gasping for air. Matty still tries to reassure you. He knows a panic attack when he sees it. He’s too familiar with them and he knows exactly what to do.

“C’mere, it’s alright okay, m’not gonna hurt you.” Matty gently pulls you closer, his arms encircling you in a protective embrace. Your head rests against his chest, and you listen intently to the steady rhythm of his breathing, each inhale and exhale a calming lullaby. The warmth of his body seeps into yours, gradually melting the tension that has gripped you for so long.

“You’re doing perfect, alright? Just keep breathing.”

You can hear the comforting thump of his heartbeat, strong and regular, grounding you in the moment. It feels like an anchor in the storm of emotions swirling inside you. Matty’s fingers trace soothing patterns on your back, and you close your eyes, focusing on the rise and fall of his chest. The world outside seems to fade away, replaced by the gentle cadence of his heartbeat.

“No one’s gonna hurt you anymore,” he whispers, “you’re safe with me.”

You hold onto him tightly as well as grasping onto his shirt. His arms are just around you, gently swaying you from side to side. You are shaking and sobbing uncontrollably. You can’t think, you can’t breathe. You feel like you are suffocating.

“Sorry- I’m sorry,” you sob. Matty tightens your hug bringing you closer to him.

“Nah, love, don’t apologize ever.”

Minutes have gone by, and Matty is still holding onto you, not daring to let you go until you feel better. Your cries slowly start to quiet down, and your chest pain fades away. Matty hold on to you feels like no one and nothing could ever hurt you because he's there.

“That’s my girl,” Matty notices you stopped shaking, and your sobs started to die down. He stops holding you and holds your face. He gently wipes your tears with his thumbs and looks at you with his soft eyes.

“Need to take care of that, s’that alright?” He asks, his thumb brushing over your eyebrow and you hiss, feeling his touch close enough to your wound. You nod and let him guide you into the living room.

Matty guides you gently to the living room, where he sits you down on the couch. “Stay here,” he murmurs, his voice soothing, “I’ll get the first aid kit.” He disappears for a moment, leaving you to take in the warmth and safety of his home. You clutch the edge of the blanket he draped over you earlier, trying to steady your breathing.

When Matty returns, he kneels in front of you with the kit in hand. He opens it and takes out some antiseptic wipes and gauze. “This might sting a bit, love, but I’ll be gentle,” he says, his eyes filled with concern.

He carefully wipes the wound on your eyebrow, his touch feather-light. You wince slightly, but his gentle murmurs and the warmth of his presence make it more bearable. “There we go, you’re doing great,” he says softly, his fingers brushing your skin as he works. The scent of antiseptic fills the air, but it’s mingled with the comforting aroma of Matty’s home—coffee, a hint of vanilla, and something uniquely him.

As he cleans your wound, you find yourself looking into his eyes. They’re warm and kind, a safe haven amidst the chaos of your thoughts. “I know it’s been a rough night,” he whispers, his voice steady and reassuring, “but you’re safe now. I will not let them hurt you anymore.“

You nod, feeling a lump in your throat, but the urge to cry is slowly being replaced by a sense of calm. “Thank you, Matty,” you manage to say, your voice barely above a whisper. He gives you a small, comforting smile.

Matty finishes cleaning the wound and applies a small bandage. “There, all done,” he says, his hands lingering a moment longer on your skin, grounding you in his warmth. “How are you feeling now?”

You take a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts. “A bit better,” you admit, “I don’t want to go back there.“

“You don’t have to, promise,” he says, his hands on yours, “stay with me, we’ll figure something out, not now though.”

He sits beside you on the couch, close but not overwhelming, his presence a quiet reassurance. “We can take it one step at a time, yeah?” he says, his hand still on yours. “D’you want to talk about it.”

You shake your head, “always the same, I’m a shit daughter and then he h-hit me.”

“Fucks sake, you are not a shit daughter, they are shit people. S’not your fault.” He puts an arm around your shoulder and you immediately lean into him, the warmth of his body seeping into your own. “You’re a good person, love, too good for any one else. Don’t listen to a word they’re saying, they’re daft if they don’t see that you’re perfect.”

You nod, feeling a flicker of belief, a tiny spark in the darkness. “Thank you, Matty,” you whisper, your voice trembling but sincere. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

He leans back slightly to look at you, his hand still resting on your shoulder. “You don’t have to thank me, love. I’m just glad I can be here for you.” His eyes search yours, concern and care etched in his features. “D’you want to watch something? Maybe take your mind off things for a bit?”

You shake your head, a small smile playing on your lips despite everything. “No, I think I just want to go to bed. Would you… could you stay with me? Just until I fall asleep?” Your voice wavers, the vulnerability in your request making your heart pound.

Matty’s expression softens even more. “Course, love. I’ll stay with you as long as you need.” He stands up, helping you to your feet, and wraps an arm around you as he guides you to the bedroom.

The room is dimly lit, the soft glow of the bedside lamp casting a warm, comforting light.

“I’ll give you some clothes of mine, shirt and sweat pants alright?” You nod and sit down on the bed waiting for Matty to return.

He returns with clothes and leaves the room for you to change. When you’re done he comes back.

Matty pulls back the covers for you, and you slip into bed, the sheets cool against your skin. He sits on the edge, his hand brushing a strand of hair from your face.

“You comfortable?” he asks, his voice low and soothing. You nod, feeling a wave of exhaustion wash over you. “Good. I’ll be right here.”

He lies down beside you, his presence a solid reassurance against the darkness that threatens to creep in. You snuggle into his side, his arm draped over you, holding you close. The steady rhythm of his breathing, the warmth of his body next to yours, and the gentle pressure of his hand on your back create a cocoon of safety and peace.

You’re exhausted. Sad. Angry. Every time your thoughts come back to earlier tears are threatening to fall. A tired tear slips from your eyes.

“Oh, dear, s’alright.” Matty’s voice is a gentle murmur in the dimly lit room. He reaches out, his fingers brushing the tear away. “You’re safe now, remember?”

You nod, but the emotions still churn inside you, a storm you can’t quite calm. Matty shifts closer, pulling you into his chest. His arms wrap around you in a protective embrace, his hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. You bury your face in his shirt, the fabric soft and comforting against your skin.

“I know it’s hard,” he whispers, his breath warm against your hair. “But you’re not alone anymore. I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

You cling to him more, “You don’t have to be strong all the time, love,” he continues. “It’s okay to let go, to let someone else take care of you for a while.”

A small sob escapes your lips, but it’s a release, a letting go of the weight you’ve been carrying alone for so long. Matty’s arms tighten around you, his touch firm and reassuring. He starts to hum a soft tune, the sound vibrating through his chest and into your body, soothing you, lulling you into a state of calm.

“Close your eyes, love,” he whispers, his voice barely more than a breath. “Let yourself rest. I’ve got you.”

You do as he says, your eyelids heavy with exhaustion. The darkness behind your eyes is no longer frightening; it’s a blanket, soft and warm, wrapping around you. Matty’s presence beside you, his arms around you, is a shield against the nightmares, a promise of safety.

“You promise you’re gonna stay?”

Matty sighs softly, “promise, it’s you and me right? Always.”

You hum, your breathing evens out, matching the steady rhythm of his.

“Sweet dreams, love, I love you.”



[cbrownjc]

Hi! I hope you don't mind getting an ask from me even though we've never interacted.

I have a question about Old Daniel in the IWTV series, but I don't know how to put it except: what exactly is his current health situation? He has Parkinson's disease (or at least they show us ha has some symtomps, and Daniel says it is Parkinson's), but in ep 01 of the first season Louis calls it an "autoimmune disease" (which Parkinson's is not).

They show us that Daniel keeps a bunch of pill containers on his table in his apartment, which makes sense with how Parkinson's would be treated, but then there's the "levodopa transfusion" scene which does not. (I could try to explain the pharmacokinetic reason if you're interested).

And then there's the meals, during which they keep filling his wine glass, the two Martini scenes. . . why do they keep giving him drinks?They arrange for a doctor to come and administer the "therapy" (I'm not buying that it's levodopa), but he can have all the alcoholic beverages in the world? When they most likely would interfere with the pharmacological therapy he's supposed to be taking?

It all seems a bit suspicious to me. What do you think?

(apologies for any mistakes, english is not my first language)

Hi! It's fine to ask me questions even if we've never interacted before, I don't mind. 🙂

So, as far as we know older Daniel on the show has Parkinson's disease for sure. Daniel pretty much confirmed he does because Louis said he had it and Daniel confirmed it in episode 1x01. And the shaking very much shows he does have it IMO. Because he was specifically shown to be shaking back in episode 1x01 when he was trying to put the Fall of the Reble Angles puzzle together.

Now, as many who read my blog likely already know, I've talked about how my mom had Parkinson's and I was her primary caregiver (before she passed away). So I know a lot already about how that disease works. And so when Armand -- as Rashid -- was talking about "levodopa transfusions" for Daniel being scheduled back in episode 1x04 I was very much "WTF?" about that. The whole idea of that is sus because I know from experience that Daniel should just be taking his levodopa via pills. The only time my mom ever got levodopa administered via an IV drip was when she was staying overnight at a hospital.

So I've long thought there is way more going on with that "levodopa transfusions" Daniel got, and have talked about it here and here. Though at the current time, the theory I talk about in those links might be outdated at this point, though I think there might still be a little something to them.

But, if you know the lore, Dr. Fareed -- the doctor who arrived back in episode 1x06 to administer Daniel's transfusion -- is not only a vampire himself but runs a clinic in the books where he looks into and does experiments regarding vampire physiology. And something else that caught my eye about that clinic he runs as I've been reading Prince Lestat, is that it is said in the book that Fareed and his vampire Maker (and lover) Seth, "ran a small clinic for mortal incurables."

And Parkinson's is very much "incurable."

So yeah, I think something is going on when it comes to Dr. Fareed giving Daniel that IV drip of levodopa. Because even when it comes to the idea of cloning, that's a lot to go through just to get something like a blood sample or something I think. But hey, there's really no saying when it comes to that I guess . . .

As to such as Louis calling it an "autoimmune disease" I just chalk that up to either a writing mistake or, hell just Louis being a vampire. He might just not know the correct medical term to use for it. That is also something that is going into in the Prince Lestat book -- how it can sometimes be very hard for vampires to keep abreast of tech and other things at any given time if they do not encounter it or use it regularly. (Lestat is always forgetting and losing his iPhones). As to the alcohol that, again, could just be the show not really looking too closely at such things (because outside of medical shows, many drama shows don't), or maybe Daniel only being allowed one glass a night and being given some okay about it we never saw. Who knows at this point. 🤷🏾‍♀️

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Night Moves 3

Warnings: dark elements, noncon, stealing, crime, other dark elements. Proceed with caution.

Note: Please let me know what you think as it helps me a lot with ideas and I love interacting with you all.

Part of The Club AU

The music hazes and the lights blur. You’re not drunk, you never drink much on your night out, only pretending to sip the cocktails men buy you. No, you’re mindless from the man beneath you. Your walls clench around him and you let out a moan. 

You’re achy from how long he’s been inside you. Still, he hasn’t cum. He stopped fucking you a while ago. He just keeps you on his lap, thrusting ever now and again to make you twitch. As you think of it, he does it and you brace the table to keep from keeling over. 

The coloured lights flash in a strange pattern and he tickles your sides. He leans forward, his head next to yours as his sultry breath speckles across your skin. He reaches between your legs and flicks your cunt. 

“Last call, sweetheart,” he eases you off of him and you whimper.  

He slides you onto the seat next to him and you whimper as he tucks himself into his briefs. You grab your purse and he reaches to grip your wrist. You gulp and look him in the eyes. They’re as blue as the ocean. 

“I didn’t say we’re done,” he lifts a brow, “don’t make me chase you.” 

He lets go and sits back, zips up, and buckles his belt. His chest rises and falls and he peers around confidently. He’s so damn brazen. He was buried inside you for at least an hour, sitting there balls deep, and he can only smirk. 

“Come on,” he stands and snaps his fingers. 

You stand and sidle out from behind the table. He quickly catches up to you as you face the thinning dance floor and slings his arm around your back. He walks you between the drunken bodies. 

“Am I under arrest?” You ask. 

“That wouldn’t be much fun,” he grits as he strides on. 

You’re quiet. You won’t push it. You still have hope you won’t be headed down to the station. You can’t afford the fine to get out, even after all you took that night. They’d confiscate it anyway. 

“What’s a girl like you doing lifting wallets?” He asks as you pass through the front doors into the cool night air.  

You scoff as your heels clack on the pavement, “gotta eat.” 

“Sure, sweetheart,” he hums, “look at you,” he does just that, glancing over, “any man would hand over his salary just for a night with you.” 

You snicker sardonically, “hah, you men... you all assume it’s so easy for women. That any one of us can just get by on our looks. You think this hair is free, this lip gloss?” 

“Sweetheart, I’m not assuming, I’m telling you,” he keeps you walking. 

“Sure, whatever, “ you shake your head. “You’re right, I’m gonna change my ways, sir, and find me a rich old man and let him fuck me til his heart gives out. Maybe then, I’ll get a taste of his fortune.” 

He chuckles and stops you by the curb, just beside a dark blue sportscar, “where do you live?” 

“What?” 

“Where do you live?” he asks slower. 

You blink, “Oxbury.” 

“How many rooms?” 

“Huh?” 

“Answer the questions.” 

You huff and look away, “it’s a bachelor loft. Everything’s in the same room.” 

“How much do you pay?” He prompts. 

“What does that matter? Are you going to arrest me or can I go?” 

“Sure, you can go after you answer my questions,” he insists. 

This is surreal. Only minutes ago he was inside you. You were shameless sitting on his dick and now he’s interrogating you about where you live. 

“Two grand. It’s a rip off but nothing’s cheap around here.” 

He narrows his eyes, nodding as he pokes the tip of his tongue out. 

“I’ll give you double. Just for tonight.” 

“I’m a thief, not a prostitute,” you frown. 

“That’s not what I’m...” his cheek dimples and his lashes flick, “not just tonight. Tomorrow. I’ll find you a new place. Something nicer. Something with big windows.” 

You shake your head in confusion, “what do you mean?” 

“We’ll get you settled and when we come back here,” he steps closer and reaches around your neck to check the tag on your dress, “I’ll have you in Gucci.” 

You search his face as he steps back. He’s arrogant and certain. You’re not. You’ve been caught out and you can’t afford to say no. But what if you do? 

“Do I have a choice?” You voice your doubt. 

“Not really,” he exhales, “there’s two options; my place or the station.” 

You close your eyes and cringe. That’s about what you expected. You flutter your lashes open and wet your lips. 

“It wasn’t bad. We both know it wasn’t. I still got your cum on me,” he tugs at his belt, “and I’m backed up. You can’t leave me like this.” 

Your cheeks burn. As much as you want to say no, on principle, on what little pride you still have, he makes you tingle. You tried it with the wrong man but there’s something right about him too. You can’t remember the last time you orgasmed that wasn’t off something battery-powered. 

“How do I trust you?” 

“I could ask you the same,” he counters. “This isn’t trust, it’s convenient. You need money, you deserve money. Luxury. Girl like you, shit, whew, I’ll make sure you got everything those tricky hands could never steal. You just gotta keep me happy.” 

It still feels wrong. You’re still selling yourself. Yet, it isn’t exactly your worst option. Jail or sugar baby? It’s obvious but difficult nonetheless. 

“Do I have to say it out loud?” You ask. 

He grins, “well, I’d like to hear it. Come on, my ego needs it.” 

You arch your brow and cross your arms, “alright, I’ll do it. Deal.” 

[happydragon]

To Coming Home

Summary: Tech should not have survived that fall. But he did. Now he needs to get back home. My take on a Tech lives au.

Ao3

Rating: Gen

Word Count: 6,499 (so close lol)

Disclaimer:  I in no way shape or form, have any sort of mobility disability or use a cane to walk. I in no way shape or form meant to offend anyone who does and hope I gave a semi-accurate depiction of what it can be like

The first thing Tech remembered when he woke up was falling. He could still hear the groaning of metal and air rushing past his ears as he fell to what he thought would be his death. Seeing as he was not only resting on a soft but firm surface but could still feel pain throughout his entire body, that did not appear to be the case. 

Next thing he remembered was seeing Wrecker reach out in an attempt to grab Tech. Tech was confident that this was not the case either as he was sure Hunter would have said something as soon as Tech was awake. 

This led him to the conclusion that he did indeed fall due to enacting Plan 99 but has somehow survived. Not unscathed obviously. The pain was a very helpful reminder of that. The question of course remained of how he survived. A good place to start would be to figure out where he was exactly. 

After struggling for a moment to open his eyes, he finally succeeded and was welcomed by an unfamiliar brown ceiling. Now that he was properly awake, Tech could now tell he was in a bed of some sort. He turned his head to the side, much to the protest of his unused muscles, and found a nightstand with a single cup. To his other side was a wall and along the wall was a single durasteel door with no lock. 

He had just begun to push himself up so he could investigate the contents of the cup when the door opened to reveal a large surly human man, his face covered by a thick dark beard and head covered by a hat or head covering of some sort. He wore a clean and simple shirt with the sleeves rolled up, revealing hairy and tanned arms. His pants were also simple but appeared to be covered with flecks of mud. 

“Ah,” the man simply stated, “So you finally decided to wake up.”

“So it seems,” Tech coughed, his voice hoarse from inactivity.

The man said nothing as he strode forward, picked up the glass, and with a gentleness that took Tech slightly by surprise, the man lifted the glass to Tech’s lips, supporting his head as he drank. Tech was glad to discover it was water and drank it greedily. Once he emptied the cup, the man placed the cup back on the nightstand, pulled a chair Tech had not seen before, and set it next to the bed. The man then proceeded to sit in the chair, leaned back, and gave a big sigh.

“Name’s Thom Dodonna,” he began, “I’m sure you have some questions just like I have some for you. I’ll do you a favor and tell you how you ended up here so we can get rid of any unnecessary questions. Afterward, you can ask me your questions, but then I’m going to ask mine. Understood?”

Tech nodded, finding this the most logical course of action. 

“Good,” Thom gruffed, “About several weeks back, I was checking some of my fish traps in one of the deeper lakes around here when a railcar hit the water and you came falling in after it. You must have known you were about to hit the water because you somehow managed to go in feet first, which helped lessen some of your injuries. Once I recovered from the shock, I dove in after you, seeing as you didn’t come back up right away. After I got you to shore, I took you to the nearby town where the doc had you in a bacta tank for about two weeks before someone else needed it more. Doc gave me permission to bring you to my place, away from nosy people, so you could continue to recover. You’ve been here for almost a week and a half and this is the first time you’ve actually been conscious.”

Tech took a moment to process the information. So he did survive the fall and was still on Eriadu, which meant one of two things. One was that his family believed that he was dead and would explain why he was not with them now. The other conclusion was that it was they who did not survive the mission and had been either captured or killed, thus making his sacrifice pointless. While he most definitely preferred one over the other, he currently had no way of knowing if either was true. He would need to add it to the ever-growing list of problems that he hoped could be solved quickly.

“Firstly,” Tech began, “I’d like to thank you for rescuing me and seeing to my recovery. I believe I am in your debt.”

Thom huffed but said nothing, so Tech continued, “Secondly, I would like to inquire as to the extent of my injuries.”

“Well, Doc said most of the life-threatening stuff had been taken care of by the bacta, but because you weren’t in there long enough, not everything was fixed.”

Thom reached behind him, toward the same place where he got the chair, pulled a cane, and leaned it against the nightstand. 

“Doc said you did some serious damage to your legs and may need some help walking right even with physical therapy. Doc also said you’d be experiencing some pain but didn’t say if it would stop or not.”

Well. That wasn’t nearly as bad as Tech initially thought. While neither was ideal, he’d much rather be in pain and never walk properly again than be dead. Perhaps he could modify his cane to his liking. It would certainly be helpful if it had more than one use. It would be a good project to work on for a later date. 

“Very well,” Tech finally said, “My next question would be if you have sort of long-range communications so that I may contact my family.”

“Unfortunately I don’t. There’s only one in town and it’s run by the Empire. Now I’d like to ask you some questions.”

While Tech was disappointed that he could not contact his family to know whether or not they were alive, in turn, let them know he was alive, he knew it was probably for the best. If the Empire intercepted his message, they might use it to capture Tech and possibly use him as bait for his family. Of course, he could encrypt it, but that meant they would come here to get him and Eriadu was still an Imperial-occupied planet. Tech already sacrificed himself to make sure they escaped. He would not be the reason they were captured. 

He suddenly realized that Thom was waiting for Tech’s permission to start asking questions. Tech internally shook his head, then nodded for Thom to continue. 

“Are you an Imperial or a bounty hunter?”

“No, I am not.”

“Good. Don’t tell me what you are though. The less I know the better. I assume you need to hide from certain people while you recover?”

“If possible, yes.”

“Alright then. I’ll go let Doc know you’re awake and get you started on healing.”

All Tech could do was nod as Thom stood up and walked out to find the doctor. As he lay there, he wondered how long it would take for him to recover. Ideally, he would hope not too long. He would like to return to his family as soon as possible. Realistically, it could take months, quite possibly a year at most. There was also the issue of getting back to his family. He’d rather have a ship, as it would be easier and safer to get a direct flight from here to Pabu. He would have to ask Thom if he had one Tech could use. Flying would not require much movement and he could recover with his family. Yes, that would be the best course of action. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Much to Tech’s dismay, Thom did not have a ship Tech could use and Doctor Theala Togs, a human woman with short black hair and a tall stature, did not give a favorable timeline as to his recovery. At first, he tried to push himself for a speedier recovery, against Doctor Togs’s wishes but soon stopped. Tech has had his fair share of medics but Doctor Togs was not a woman to be crossed. 

After four months of physical therapy, Tech attempted to walk again with the support of the cane. Unfortunately, just walking to the door made him feel like he ran five klicks. It took another two months before he could walk with some semblance of ease around Thom’s home and that was with the help of a cane. Doctor Togs had explained it was not likely that he would walk without the cane again. Tech was told this when he first woke up, but that still did not prepare him for the anger he felt when it was explained to him again. He refused to leave his room for the next day and a half, only to be dragged out to get some air by Thom on Doctor Togs’s orders. 

Tech continued to exercise after that, pushing himself as much as the doctor would allow. He began to feel his strength rebuild itself and though he knew it would never be what it once was, it was a reminder that he was one step closer to reuniting with his family. He refused to believe they were anything but alive and safe on Pabu with Phee, Shep, and Lyana. If he did, he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to recover. 

In the meantime, Tech began to repair some small electronics in exchange for credits. It began with Thom’s kettle, which had stopped working, much to his frustrations. Once Tech acquired a pair of round spectacles, (his helmet and goggles were removed after he was brought to shore. Thom attempted to back and find them, but he said that someone had come and cleaned the crash site, leaving no trace there ever was a crash) he was able to repair it in less than a minute. Then Thom began to bring items from various townsfolk. Mostly small things, a short-range com unit here, a datapad there. In return, he was given a handful of credits for each task. 

One day, Doctor Togs wanted Tech to walk to the town and back, so Thom took Tech with him on his next trip to town. They strolled from shop to shop, Tech needing multiple breaks to rest his aching legs. He was incredibly grateful for Thom’s endless patience. He didn’t speak much, but he was a good man. 

On one such break, Tech noticed a rodian woman become increasingly frustrated with her servant droid. The droid was placed on a table and powered down while the woman seemed to be trying to find the problem with the droid. After a particularly nasty string of curses that could make a pirate blush, Tech stood up from where he was seated and approached the woman, offering his assistance. 

“Might as well,” she said as she stepped away from the droid, “The only repair shop around here charges way too much. You’d save me some credits if you can fix the damn thing.”

Tech simply nodded and examined the droid. He quickly found the problem and asked for the tool she was using, repairing the droid in under ten minutes. 

“I can’t believe it!” she exclaimed, “You sir just saved me an arm and a leg! How much do I owe you?”

Tech began to insist it was no trouble, but Thom interrupted, “He’ll take ten credits.”

“Oh! I didn’t realize he was with you, Thom.”

“He’s a family friend. Staying with me while he recovers from an accident that damaged his legs.”

“Sorry to hear that. Hope you recover quickly,” she said to Tech, then fished ten credits from her bag and handed them to him. “What’s your name so I can refer others to you? Maker knows we need someone that won’t cheat us for an easy job.”

As he took the credits, he thought for a moment before responding, “You may call me Titus Genoa.”

Shortly thereafter, Tech began to make daily trips into town to repair various household items or droids. He thrived in his comfort zone. He was relieved to have some semblance of normal in this new challenge. There were of course some days when the ache in his legs was too strong, and Thom would bring the items to Tech. 

Thankfully the Imperial presence was next to nothing which allowed Tech to operate a little more freely. Unfortunately, his presence seemed to anger others, namely the human man who ran the local repair shop. The man tried to bribe Tech to stop and when that didn’t work the man threatened Tech. Tech simply ignored the man and continued to work. This was a mistake. 

On the way back to Thom’s home one day, Tech was cornered by some thugs. Because his strength was not what it used to be, the thugs gave him a nasty beating and stole all the credits he earned that day. Luckily, one of his regulars found him and was able to get him quickly to Doctor Togs. The first and only time Tech had ever seen Thom upset was when he learned Tech kept the threats a secret. From then on Thom accompanied Tech on every trip to town. Tech also found the credits he lost lying on his bed once Doctor Togs released him. He said nothing but repaired all of Thom’s traps as a thanks. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the anniversary of his rescue (and by extension the last time he saw his family and Phee) approached, Tech became increasingly, shall one say, erratic. He had all but completely recovered from his injury and could walk into town with very little need to rest. Due to this, he began to push himself and took on more projects than one could normally handle. Tech was not normal though. He was an experimental clone from Clone Force 99. His superior intellect allowed him to solve dozens of problems without resistance. So no matter what Thom thought or said, Tech was doing perfectly fine. 

He had been on his third day with little sleep, running on nothing but caf and stims, when Thom had enough and locked Tech in his room, away from any projects he was working on. Tech would be ashamed to admit later that he called his friend several colorful things in multiple languages.

Later that evening, after Tech gave up trying to escape and finally slept, Thom brought some dinner and sat down with Tech as he ate. For a while, neither of them said anything, and then Thom broke the silence. 

“Tell me about them,” he said, “About your loved ones. You don’t need to tell me any names. Just about them.”

So Tech did. He told Thom about his childhood spent with his brothers raising hell and how, when they were old enough, they fought together as a unit. Later another brother joined them and they were unbeatable. Then the Empire came and it all changed. While Tech gained a sister, he lost a brother. Then it was a series of adventure after adventure. He left out any part dealing directly with the Empire as he was worried that would reveal too much. 

When he began to talk about Pabu and Phee, Thom’s face changed into a mischievous teasing smile. 

“She your love?” Thom teased. Tech knew he was teasing but the comment still made him pause. Is that what Phee was to him? He knew she meant something, seeing as he took her name when he needed to give one. He couldn't imagine she would mind, but why did he do it? There were certainly other names he could have used, but he chose hers. Why? Because she meant something. She gave him and his family a place to call home. A place where Omega could have grown up free and happy. That’s all he’s ever wanted for his family. For them to be happy. Whether that was continuing to fight for the Republic or building a life away from everything. While on Pabu, Tech could imagine building such a life, one that he hoped could include a certain liberator of ancient wonders. He also did not leave things on the best of notes. Which meant all the more reason he needed to get back.

“I do not know yet,” Tech finally answered, “But if she’ll have me then yes.”

Thom nodded, happy with the answer. Then he took the tray and told Tech to get some sleep. Tech began to protest, but Thom was gone before he could even get the words out. Tech did not need to sleep. He needed to get back to his family. The same family that would just accept it when he would sometimes pull all-nighters. However, if he did too many in a row, Hunter would order Wrecker to grab a hold of Tech. He would then be forced into a sleep pile with the rest of their family. Tech in turn would do the same whenever Hunter had begun to overwork himself. 

So while he needed to get back to his family, they would want for him to take care of himself. As long as they were safe on Pabu, Tech could be patient for just a little longer but once he had all the credits he needed, he was going home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I do not suppose I’ll see you again,” Tech asked Thom as the former stood at the bottom of the ramp of his brand-new ship. After one year, three months, ten days, six hours, and 21 minutes, Tech finally had enough credits to buy a decent ship that could take him to Pabu. It wasn’t the Marauder, but it would suffice. He thankfully did not have much to pack; only some clothes and the wooden cane he was first given. When he found out Thom had carved it for Tech, he could not bring himself to modify it. He was grateful when it wasn’t broken by those thugs who attacked him that night. To be perfectly honest, Tech didn’t think even Wrecker could break it. It was a very solid cane. 

“Probably for the best,” Thom replied, “We’d probably get each other into too much trouble.”

“Yes, I suppose that is a possibility.” Tech smiled. “Thank you for everything, Thom. I do not know how I could ever repay you.”

“Your friendship is more than enough for me.” A pause. “Though I do have one request.”

“Name it.”

“Your name. Even if we never see each other again, it would bring me comfort to know your real name.”

On one hand, Tech was surprised. Never once had Thom asked for Tech’s real name. When he first told that rodian woman his false name, Thom had only asked if it was real. Tech confirmed that it was not, Thom simply nodded and went about whatever he was doing. On the other hand, Tech was relieved. He had not heard his name in quite some time, with the exception of Omega calling it out as he fell when he sometimes dreamt of that day. To hear it again from a friend would bring endless joy. A sign that Tech was finally going home. 

“That is most agreeable,” Tech answered, “It is Tech.”

“Tech,” Thom tested the name on his tongue, “Suits you, what with how good you are with tech.”

“Technically, according to my brothers, that was not the reason for which I was named Tech, but yes, it does suit me well.”

Thom barked a hearty laugh, no doubt figuring out the real reason Tech was named Tech. Even though he did not originally like the reason for his name, it now brought a smile to his face at the memory. 

“Well Tech,” Thom said after he composed himself, “I wish you a safe journey back to your family.”

Tech nodded in thanks, then he walked up the ramp and into the ship. As he sat in the pilot’s seat going through his pre-flight checklist, he spotted Thom through the window watching the ship. Just as Tech began to take off, he saluted Thom, to which he responded in kind, before the ship took off toward the sky. 

As he inputted the coordinates for Pabu, Tech tried to think of what he was going to say to his family. He knew they believed him to be dead, so how does one reveal they are not. Truly, there was no easy or simple way of breaking the news, so he would have to do what he and his brothers do best. Improvise. 

When he arrived in the planet’s atmosphere, Tech decided the trip was both too long and not quick enough. Doubt had begun to seep into his mind. What if they had moved on? What if they had replaced him? Would there be any room for him? What if his family truly wasn’t safe here but had been captured, even worse killed by the Empire?

A beeping from the ship pulled Tech from his spiraling thoughts. A ship was trying to hail him which concerned Tech. That’s never happened before. Last time something similar happened was when they first arrived back on Kamino, just after the order went out. A wave of panic ran through Tech. Had the Empire taken over? If they had, that meant his family wasn’t there. He had no clue where they could be if they weren’t on Pabu. He might truly never see them again. 

No. He mustn't think like that. Even if he didn’t know where they could be, he would find them. No matter how long it took or who stood in his way, he would find them. Of that he was sure. 

The other ship continued to hail him. Even if the Empire had taken over, there had to be someone who might know where his family was. For now, he would play along, so he could land and hopefully find some answers. So he accepted the call, preparing for the worst. 

“Unidentified ship,” a familiar voice began, “State your name and purpose.”

“Titus Genoa,” Tech responded, giving his fake name as a precaution, “I have come to see my family.”

“Hold while we confirm.”

Tech moved to hold his hand over the button to fire the guns. If this turned bad, he wanted to be ready for anything. If he needed to shoot his way out of here, he would. After what seemed like hours, the other ship finally told him he could land near the Archium. He didn't know whether or not it was a good sign they didn’t shoot him down. Perhaps they wanted to interrogate him first. Only one way to find out. 

He did not see the Marauder as he landed but tried not to fret too much about it. Perhaps they were just out for the moment. However, his mind could not decide between his family being alive and well or in danger and it was starting to annoy him. Hopefully, he will have answers soon. 

Seeing no point in delaying any longer, Tech grabbed his cane and walked over to the entrance of the ramp. He painstakingly waited for it to lower all the way, anxious to get off. When it landed with a thud, he knew it was now or never. Part of Tech was grateful that the sun had begun its descent into the sea so that he was not blinded by the harsh light as he began to walk down the ramp. When he looked out onto the courtyard, he found it mostly empty save for a handful of very important people.

Tech supposed he shouldn’t be surprised at the sight of his brothers and Phee aiming their blasters at him, seeing as he used Phee’s name knowing she did not have any family outside of Shep and Lyana. He too would be outright suspicious. 

“I would raise both my hands,” Tech said as he raised one hand in the air, “but I’m afraid I would not stand very long if I did.”

While their faces all displayed various forms of shock, Wrecker was the first to lower his blaster. 

“Is it really you?” Wrecker asked in what could be considered a whisper to him and his family and a normal voice to outsiders. 

Before Tech could answer, yes it really is me, another familiar voice called out, causing the five of them to turn and find Omega running straight for them. As she got closer, she slowed to a stop, confusion taking over her features as she looked at her brothers standing with Phee and then over to where Tech stood. Her confusion immediately shifted into shock and disbelief as she called out in a whimper, “Tech?”

Tech was barely holding in his own emotions at the sight of her. She had grown up more. Her hair was longer and her face shape reminded him of Crosshair’s. Gone was the baby fat that she once held, leaving behind a growing young lady. 

“Hello Omega,” Tech said, his voice cracking, “You have grown up.”

She yelled his name once more before barreling toward him. It took all of his strength to stand as he let his cane clatter to the ground and held his arms open for her. Of course, once she tackled him he fell back but he didn't care. His sister was in his arms and he didn't want to ever let her go. He felt his neck grow wet from where she buried her face. He was sure his own tears had made their way onto her as well. 

Suddenly they were being lifted up, as Wrecker had somehow snuck up on them and was now pulling them into his arms. He held them close as he mumbled “I'm so sorry. I should have been stronger,” over and over again. 

Tech freed the arm that wasn't holding Omega from Wrecker's grip and wound it around his large brother’s neck. With his hand, Tech pulled Wrecker's forehead toward his and whispered that he didn't blame him, every time Wrecker apologized. 

Eventually, Wrecker set Omega and Tech on the ground, with Tech having to grip his brother’s arm to keep himself upright. Wrecker looked concerningly at Tech, as the former placed a gentle hand over the latter’s grip. 

“Omega.” She hummed at the sound of her name. “Could you please grab my cane for me?”

She cocked her head until she turned to where he was pointing and found the cane on the ground next to the ramp. She hopped off the ramp and grabbed it, handing it to Tech. He thanked her as he let go of Wrecker and walked the rest of the way down the ramp. While Tech appreciated Wrecker's concern as he hovered close, Tech knew it was unnecessary. He has used a cane for almost a year now. As long as he took plenty of breaks, he would be just fine. 

When Tech reached the others, Phee gave him a teary smile, while Hunter and Crosshair still stood in shock. Although Hunter seemed to recover more quickly as he pulled Tech close. Hunter placed a hand on Tech’s head and another on his neck, fingers immediately finding the pulse. 

“I should have gone back,” Hunter whispered into Tech's hair, “I abandoned you.” 

“You could not have known I survived,” Tech argued, “I also found myself quite surprised when I discovered I did not in fact die.”

“How did you? Survive, I mean.”

“That is a question that can wait,” Tech said as he pulled away from Hunter and turned to Crosshair. He had yet to utter a single word. His hands were clutching his rifle tightly, staring at Tech as if he were a ghost. Tech doesn’t blame him. He could almost say the same for Crosshair. It had been so long since Tech had last seen his brother. When Tech fell, one of his biggest regrets was that he would never see Crosshair again. But now he was here. They both were and neither of them had moved nor spoken a word. To be quite honest, Tech was tired of all the dramatics, not to mention his brothers’ apologies. 

“If you aren’t going to say anything, then I will.” Tech paused for a moment before continuing, “Very well. Firstly, only because I have heard enough of it from Wrecker and Hunter, whatever reason you're sorry for, I forgive you and I do not blame you. Secondly, I do not regret what I did and I would do it again- oh!”

Crosshair shoved the rifle away and yanked Tech close, the former’s arms pulling the latter tight. Because he was startled by the sudden movement, Tech once again dropped his cane, but he didn’t care as he wrapped his arms around his brother. Crosshair immediately buried his face in the crook of Tech’s neck and breathed in deeply. 

“If you ever try to pull a Plan 99 again,” Crosshair mumbled, “I’ll shoot you myself.” 

“Only if you promise to never leave us again.”

Crosshair laughed wetly. “Deal.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After a very tearful reunion, his brothers and sister took him to their home where Tech was allowed to rest his legs. Hunter insisted on hearing Tech’s story first before the others told theirs. Tech suspected that theirs was far more exciting than his, but he humored them anyway. It wasn’t a very long story either. He was rescued and taken in by a local who, with the help of a doctor, helped Tech to walk again. Not wanting to put his family in danger, he repaired various items in exchange for credits, which were later used to purchase a ship and fly here. 

“I will admit,” Tech began, “I was quite worried that the Empire had taken over when that other ship hailed me. Although I suppose I should have known it wasn’t an Imperial standard ship, but seeing as I was distracted by worry, you’ll have to forgive me.”

“To be honest,” Hunter chuckled softly, “You weren’t too far off.”

With that, they explained how shortly after they lost Tech, the Empire had taken Omega. Hunter and Wrecker crossed the galaxy five times looking for her, but she, along with Crosshair, found them first. All was well for a short while until the Empire came to Pabu and took Omega once more. Hunter, Crosshair, Wrecker, and Echo had found Tantiss and went in with no backup. When Omega explained how Hemlock was defeated, it was then revealed to Tech that Crosshair had lost his hand. Tech wanted to hit himself for not noticing how Crosshair seemed to be wearing gloves in Pabu’s warm climate. Instead, Tech reached for his brother’s hand, grabbed it, and gave it a tight squeeze, which Crosshair returned. 

Later that evening, Shep decided to throw a party in Tech’s honor. Thankfully it was not a large party; mostly Tech’s family and a sprinkling of others, such as the clone cadets that Wrecker and Hunter rescued. Mox reminded Tech of Hunter in some ways, while Stak resembled Crosshair in other ways. Deke, on the other hand, reminded Tech of both himself and Wrecker. The cadet was kind and sociable like Wrecker, but Deke seemed to have an affinity for technology like Tech. They currently lived with one of Pabu’s older residents after Hunter and Wrecker brought them to the island. 

As the evening drifted on, Tech found himself stepping away from the party, if only to give his legs a rest. Omega had been helping him make introductory rounds to some of the clones they rescued as well as a few of the children that she was held captive with. While most of them were polite and just said hello, some of them wanted to stand and talk with Tech. This of course led to his legs causing him a great deal of pain, so he excused himself to find some place quiet to sit. That is how he found himself inside Shep’s home sitting in one of the chairs in the living space. 

“Not much of a party kind of guy huh?”

Tech turned in his chair to find Phee casually approaching him like he hadn’t seemingly come back from the dead. After his family decided to go back to their home, she had left them, declaring she would let them catch up. Tech tried not to be disappointed and respect her decision, but he wished he could have talked to her as well. There was much he wanted to say. 

“Normally no,” Tech replied as he subconsciously rubbed his legs. Phee’s eyes drifted to the movement, then to his cane that was leaning against the arm of the chair. “But this one is quite alright, I suppose.” 

“Yeah,” Phee chuckled, “Shep originally wanted to invite the whole island, especially since you helped with the sea surge. But I managed to talk him down into doing a smaller party.”

“Then I must thank you.”

Phee waved him off as she sat on the couch that was placed vertically to Tech’s chair. If one were to walk in, they would assume the quiet was a comfortable one, but in actuality, there were many things Tech wanted to say but didn’t know where to start. Thankfully, Phee seemed to know exactly where she wanted to start. 

“Can I ask you something that’s been bugging me?” Tech nodded. “Why’d you choose my name?”

“Well, I suppose there are a multitude of reasons as to why I picked your name. Namely, it was the first one that came to mind that did not have a known association with clones.”

“What makes you think I’m not popular?” Phee teased, a mischievous grin that did not meet her eyes graced her lips. 

“When meeting people, I sometimes researched them, so that I may prepare my family for what kind of person whoever we were meeting could be. I did the same when we first met but only found a birth record.”

Her grin turned into a sad smile as she nodded. 

“Yeah that sounds about right,” she said.

Tech decided he did not like the look of sadness on her. It did not align with the woman he knew, who was full of life and adventure. 

“Another reason,” he began again as he looked away from her, “I suppose I chose it, was because of the feelings I held toward you. Still do in fact.”

“Yeah?” her voice was coated in teasing, “Did ya think about me a lot?”

“Yes. I thought of everyone, every day. Though most of my thoughts were of my family and you. It took me far too long to return to you all and I do not wish to repeat the experience.”

When he looked back, tears had formed in her eyes and Tech began to panic. He said something wrong didn’t he? Why did he think it would be simple? They had not seen each other in almost a year. Technically to her, he was dead until today. She understandably would have moved on.

“Kriff,” she whispered, bringing his focus back to the present, where he saw her rub her eyes, “You can’t just go around sayin’ things like that, Brown Eyes. Makes me want to kiss ya.”

Tech felt heat quickly warm his face and ears. Ah. He seemed to have misread the situation. This improved things slightly. Before this could continue further, he needed to be closer. So with his cane, he pulled himself up out of the chair, slowly shuffled to the couch, and sat next to Phee. She had briefly held her hands out to catch him, but he assured her he was fine. Once seated, he made sure to rest his cane against the couch so it would not fall, then angled himself toward Phee. She was still attempting to dry her eyes, so he gently grabbed both her hands and held them in his. 

“Earlier today,” He began softly, “we did not have the chance to converse as I had wanted. I wish to apologize for how I left things between us. I was and still am, new to the idea of someone besides my family caring about my well-being. I calculated that that mission would be dangerous and there were no guarantees of our survival. You of all people deserved to have known that.”

“I will admit I was not a pretty sight for the first few days after your brothers came back,” Phee said, “I had never shown Pabu to anyone else before. I knew you and your family deserved a shot at normal life. The time we spent together before you left made me hope that I could be included in that life. I had never cared for someone that much since my sister, Shep, and Lyana.”

“Do you still care for me? In that way I mean.”

Phee pulled her hand from his grip and cupped his face. Tears once again began to well up in her eyes, but this time there was a genuine smile on her face. “Yes,” she whispered. 

“I care for you as well,” he replied. Then Tech placed his hand over hers and turned to kiss her palm. 

“If you’re going to kiss me, at least do it right.”

“Very well,” he whispered as he brought his hand to the back of her neck and pulled her close. Their lips met for a moment, but it felt like an eternity to Tech. Her lips were soft, warm, and perfect in every way possible. When she pulled away, he tried not to visibly frown as he missed her warmth. He did not succeed, as she took one look at him, smiled, and kissed him again. 

“Tech!” Wrecker called, “Come back outside! We’re about to make a toast!”

Reluctantly, Tech and Phee pulled apart, with Tech visibly frowning which caused Phee to laugh and drop her head to his shoulder. 

“If it’s my party, I should get to do whatever I please,” he huffed. Phee just laughed as she pulled away from him and stood up, offering him a hand. He took it and she helped him up while she reached across for his cane to hand to him. 

“They mean well,” Phee defended half-heartedly, “Come on. It would be rude to keep them waiting.”

He offered her his arm, which she gladly accepted, as they walked back outside to all their loved ones. Everyone had a drink in their hands, non-alcoholic ones for the children and those who did not want alcohol. Tech unfortunately had to release Phee’s arm in order to take the drink offered to him. Shep smiled then raised his glass and toasted, “To coming home!”

Yes. Tech was finally home.

[kaunis-sielu]

Lady Death

“Baby I’m fine.” Is the first thing that he says. It’s one of the worst things that he could say when you answer the phone.

“Steve?”
“I’m at Memorial.”

“What?” Memorial Hospital? He and Bucky were just going to go and do some check ins with the clubs in the area and hearing that he’s at the hospital is absolutely not what you wanted to hear. 

“I got hit, I’m fine okay? I’m fine but I do need you to come and pick me up.” You hear a slight tussle and suddenly Bucky’s voice is filling your ear. 

“He has a concussion so he doesn’t really remember the hit. It wasn’t an accident Doll.”

“What exactly does that mean?” You ask as you grab a sweatshirt, hospitals are always freezing, then grab your purse and hurry out the door.

“It means that I saw the whole thing and I know who was driving.” 
“Does he know?” You ask as you get into your SUV. 

“I don’t think so. I’m in the hallways, I don’t want him to know because I don’t need him doing something stupid.”
“Who was it Buck?”
“Hydra.” You figured. Your phone connects to your car as you start to back out of the driveway. 

“I’m on my way.” You tell him, “Stay with him? We’ll talk when I get there.” You tell Bucky who will follow your orders as if they were Steve’s, any of the Howlies will.

“I have Nat outside waiting for you. I don’t want you walking around without protection, not with Hydra lurking and apparently a hit out on Steve.” 

“You think it’s that bad?”
“I don’t know and I don’t like that.” Bucky tells you and you’re instantly more on alert. “You want me to stay on the phone?”
“Can you go back into his room and put the phone on speaker?” You just need to hear his voice, to know that Steve is okay, to know that he’s alive. 

“Of course.” You hear him moving before he says, “Steve, your woman is on the phone.”
“Baby!” Steve says happily, “Why am I here?”
“You were in an accident Punk.” Bucky says patiently, you wonder how many times he’s had to remind Steve that he’s been in an accident. 

“I’m on my way Honey.” You tell him, 

“Oh good. I miss you.” You can’t help the small smile that pulls at your lips, your husband can be so soft for you sometimes that it almost hurts. 

“I miss you too, about five minutes.” You tell Bucky who you hear hum softly, “Steve? What do you remember?”
“Leaving you and goin’ with Buck to check on some of groups.”
“He didn’t know what year it was or who the President was so the EMT’s made him come to the hospital.” Bucky informs you, you’re not surprised that the EMT’s would make him go to the hospital, those are pretty basic questions, “He didn’t forget about you though. Kept tellin’ everyone that he needed to call his girl.” God you love him.

“That’s good. I don’t think that I’d be okay if he ever forgot me.” You admit as you turn onto the street that the hospital is on, “I can see the hospital.” 

“I’ll let you go and let Nat know that you’re here.”

“Thank you.” You tell him hanging up then hop out of your car. You know that Bucky, and Steve if he wasn’t concussed, would have wanted you to stay in your car until Nat met you there but you just want to get to Steve. 

“You should be in the car.” Nat’s smoky voice says quietly from a few feet away and you pull your gun on her faster than she can blink. 

“I think I’ll manage.” You tell her coolly and she smiles a slow, deadly smile at you. 

“Well done. You’re not supposed to bring guns inside a hospital.”
“You’re also not supposed to fall in love with the leader of a biker gang when your father is a pastor but I did that too.” You tell her and Natasha laughs. 

“Touche.” You tuck the gun back into your bag and hurry into the hospital Natasha close on your heels. Bucky is waiting in the waiting room his helmet in his hands and when he sees you he looks over at the nurse, 

“This is Rogers’ wife.” He says and she gives you a nod then pushes a button to open a secure door. You follow Bucky into the ER and down a short hallway then to a room where Steve is sitting on a bed. When he goes to stand you hold out a hand to him

“Don’t you dare Steven Grant Rogers.” The nurse in the room gives a startled laugh and when you look over at her in surprise she says, 

“He’s stubborn, where were you this whole time? I could’ve used you.” 

“Steve, let the woman do her job.” You scold as Steve pouts over at you.

“Then come hold my hand Baby.” Steve flirts so you make your way to the opposite side of his bed and take his hand. He presses a kiss to the back of your hand while the nurse checks his eyes again, 

“Your pupils are looking better but we’re going to do one more CT scan before you can go. You have to stay completely still this time Mr. Rogers.”
“He was being stubborn.” Bucky tells you with an eye roll. 

“Steve, please behave so that we can go home okay?” You tell him softly and he sighs before you press a soft kiss to his jaw, “I’m going to have to keep you up tonight.” You whisper into his ear and he smirks over at you.

“You’ll still be here when I get back right?”
“Yea. I won’t go anywhere without you.” You promise, at least not until he can sleep then you’re going to take care of whoever went after your husband. Steve follows the nurse out of the room and you look over at Bucky. 

“Tell me that you’ve got them.”
“Sam’s got them.”
“Good.”
“You want Sam to take care of them?”
“No.” Bucky’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise, 

“No?”
“No. They’re mine.” You tell him fury evident in your voice and he gives you a little smirk. 

“I’ll let Sam know to keep him comfortable until you can sneak away from your very possessive and protective husband.” 

“As soon as he can sleep I want to take care of it.” You tell Bucky who nods then slips out of the room, his phone to his ear. 

When Steve comes back he pulls you to him and kisses you soundly. 

“I feel like you and Buck are plotting something.” Steve says softly when he pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours, “You are up to something.” He whispers. 

“There’s nothing you need to worry about,” You assure him, your hand carding through his hair at the back of his head, “I’ve got this my Love.” 

“What do you have?” He asks, 

“This.” You tell him, “You don’t have to worry about it okay?” 

“Baby?”
“No.” You whisper before pressing a soft kiss to his lips. “No, Steve.” The nurse comes back into the room followed by a man in a white coat. 

“Hello, I’m Dr. Johnson. I took a look at the scans, the concussion is minor. Here’s a sheet of instructions and you’re free to go.” He says passing you a couple of papers. 

“Wonderful. Thank you.” You tell him and he nods before moving back out of the room. The nurse passes you a sheet on a clipboard and you sign it before handing it back. Then you take Steve’s hand and leave the hospital with him. 

“You’re packing right?” He murmurs into your ear and you nod, 

“But Nat is outside.”
“Good. Where the hell did Bucky go?”
“He’s doing me a favor. Don’t worry.” You tell him as Nat falls into step with you on Steve’s other side. 

“They’re letting you out?” She asks coolly but you know that she’s just as relieved as you are that he’s okay and they’re letting him go. 

“Don’t be too disappointed Natasha.” Steve snarks and she laughs, 

“You’re following us home correct?” Natasha nods as you make your way to the car, you usher Steve into the passenger seat before you round the front of the car.

“Bucky said you’re going to take care of it yourself. You sure you want to do that?”
“Yes. You won’t change my mind.” 

“Okay. I am coming with you.” She says and you nod once before joining Steve in the car. 
“Now Natasha is in on your secret?” He asks and you start the car before looking over at him. You need to give Nat time to get on her bike, 

“It’s nothing you need to worry about right now Steve.”
“You’ll tell me later?”

“Yes, once you’re not concussed.” You promise him as Nat starts her bike. You ease out of the parking space and make your way home. 

The paper the doctor had given you said that he could sleep. Just to wake him every so often so after Steve falls asleep you slip out of bed, put on some clothes and head back out into the night with Natasha on your six.

The docks are cold and quiet at this time of the night. The lack of sound should be eerie but you just find it comforting. When you make your way into the basement of the large warehouse you’re pleased to see Sam and Bucky there with a man changed to the ceiling, his arms over his head while his feet touch the floor. 

“Hood off.” You command, your mask covering the lower half of your face. When the hood is removed the man blinks at you. Then he registers what he’s looking at, the mask across your nose and mouth looks like a skeleton’s, your hair is pulled back and covered by a black hood and he pales. 

“No.”
“Yes.”

“You’re Lady Death?”
“Yes.” You tell him calmly, “And you came for the only thing that I love. You tried to make me a widow, a life for your attempt at his death.”
“I’ll tell you who sent me!” The man pleads, “If you don’t kill me I’ll tell you.”
“You’ll tell me either way.” You assure him, “They always do.” 

And he does. 

Then you kill him. 

If he’d had his way, if Hydra had had their way Steve would be dead right now and you won’t let that happen. 

“Get rid of him.” You tell Bucky and Sam who nod before you go back out into the night. 

When you get home Steve is still asleep, thank god. You get ready for bed and slip into your bed next to him. 

“He dead?” Steve asks sleepily from next to you. 

“Yes.” You don’t bother lying. While he might be the leader of the Howlies you’re his left hand, the one that holds the gun. The police would never look at Steve’s sweet innocent little wife when they’re looking for a killer.

“You didn’t need to do that.”
“I protect what’s mine, just as much as you protect what’s yours.” You remind him cupping his face in your hand. 

“I love you.”

“And I love you. Now get some more sleep.” 

“Getting awful bossy on me Baby.” He teases and you laugh before kissing him again, 

“Don’t worry, I like it when you’re the boss better. I’m only stepping up because you were almost killed.”
“I’m fine.”
“Now. You are my love and my life and no one will take you from me. And anyone who tries won’t get a second chance.”
“You are my love and my life.” He tells you before curling his arm around you, “And if you think you’re sneaking off on me again you’ve lost your pretty little mind.” 

“I love you.”
“I love you.”

Tag list:

@foxyjwls007 @andahugaroundtheneck @also-fangirlinsweden @pagina16ps @annielr @princesssterek @valsworldofcreativity @dumblani @inkedaztec @loving-life-my-way @animegirlgeeky @shinycupcakebaker @eralen @sophham @gh0stgurl @wonderlandfandomkingdom @patzammit @abschaffer2 @capsiclesdoll @killcomet @sass-masterkittenmama

[blasphemecel]

Michael Kaiser — Stench

PAIRING: Michael Kaiser/Reader WORD COUNT: 9k TYPE: Angst, Childhood friends, Making up, occasionally funny WARNING(S): Poverty, implied/referenced child abuse, house break-in, spoilers for Kaiser's backstory, if I missed something lmk NOTE(S): This is a two shot but I'm posting it here combined for my own convenience. The numerals show how the chapters are separated and indicates a long time skip.

I.

Someone’s coming closer and closer. It’s hard to catch Kaiser off guard — he’s sensitive to the slightest of sounds, so he can hear them approaching from behind without trouble, these sloppy footsteps slapping against the cement as if the owner is wearing really shitty shoes. He freezes with the ball still in his hands, doesn’t dare look back and check who it is, an irrational part of his brain suspecting it to be his father.

It takes a while for whoever it is to cross the distance, and then an unfamiliar voice rings, “Hey.”

Kaiser glances over his shoulder finally. You stand there, peering down at him while he’s sitting, cigarette spreading fumes in the air even though you don’t look any older than him. He doesn’t say anything to acknowledge you, though, just stares, tense and confused about your intentions.

You crouch down so you are at eye level with him. The bad smell follows, wafting by his nose and he holds down a cough on the off chance any noise might set you off and make you violent. You pull it out of your mouth and flick it away from him, apparently possessing enough decorum to stop blowing smoke in his face. “Why are you always doing that?”

“Huh?”

Kaiser knows what you mean, but he can’t help asking. After all he’d noticed you before all those times just like you’d noticed him. Every day you hang around the solitary playground at a distance while he messes around with the ball, though he never expected you’d speak to him. If anything you never pay much mind to each other.

You usually leave like you’re on some kind of schedule, but you’re up close to him now and he can see you’re in a similar condition to him — bruises and dirt littering your skin, tattered and ill-fitting clothes barely hanging onto your frame. The offenders behind your loud entrance he identifies as the torn pink fuzzy slippers he always sees you wearing, smeared with faded mud. Certainly not the most reliable footwear, but you’re in a better boat than he is on that front, what with him not wearing any shoes at all. Not his fault he outgrew his last pair, although naturally his father found a way to blame him. He’s creative like that.

“You’re always kicking the ball and punching the shit outta it.”

Embarrassed by the reasoning behind his behavior maybe, Kaiser averts his eyes. He hopes not responding will dissuade you from interacting with him.

It doesn’t work. “What’s your name?”

“… Michael.”

“So basic, but fine. I’ll call you Micha, ok?”

“You don’t need to call me anything.”

You offer your name in return. After taking another drag, you smile and ask, “How old are you?”

“Thirteen,” he says, figuring this is unimportant enough information that he can offer it without consequences until you grow bored and go away.

You grin at him and squint your eyes. The expression makes you seem smug for no discernible reason. “I’m fourteen, so I’m your senior. You can call me boss if you want. Got it, small fry?”

What an annoying attitude. He places the ball over his stomach and adjusts his position so he’s hugging his knees, this surly expression on his face. “It’s not even that big of a difference…”

“You sound so pensive when you talk. Hey, why do you kick the ball even though you don’t have shoes? Doesn’t it hurt?”

What else is someone supposed to do with a piece of trash except hurt it? Expressing such a sentiment out loud seems shameful, though. “Why are you smoking even when it’s bad for you and stupid and tacky? Why are you asking dumb questions even though you’re not getting anything out of it?”

You burst out laughing. “Woah, relax. Touchy.” When he doesn’t respond and instead continues scrutinizing you with scorn (which at this point you deem undeserved), you say, “I stole ‘em off someone. What’s stopping you from stealing a pair of shoes?”

“They’re too big to steal. It’s impractical.”

“You think small, but fair enough,” you say, before standing up, still grinning. Then you wave. “I’ve gotta go now. I’ll see you tomorrow, Micha.”

“Who said I want to see you?”

You laugh again as if his rejection is funny, but trudge on away from him. “C’mon, lighten up.”

Kaiser scoffs, pressing his cheek against the ball, tightening his hold against it. There is nothing to lighten up about.

___

Kaiser hasn’t taken any particular liking towards you, but you do hang out together every day since you approached him. He’s not sure why he tolerates your presence. Maybe because you’re resourceful — stealing is so much easier when you two coordinate. Or maybe it’s nice to talk to someone who doesn’t seem to want to strike him down and strangle him.

Currently you’re at the playground again. The lighter you use has some ugly, childish print on it. Kaiser is trying to inflate his ball with the air pump you swiped together from a shop in town earlier after you made fun of how ‘sad and flat’ it was and came up with the idea. When he hears the flicker and then registers the smell, Kaiser asks, “How many do you smoke a day?”

“One is to be stylish. Two is if I didn’t appreciate the first one enough. Three is if I still don’t feel like shitting.”

Kaiser frowns in disapproval at the moronic remark. Funny in an ironic sort of way how this lifestyle has you sounding like a ridiculous, fake adult — neither child nor mature, but something else entirely. A different category of human. He wonders if you think the same about him. “You fucking smell. How many are there in a pack?”

“Twenty,” you say after uselessly flipping over the lid, even though for one it’s not full and you already know the answer anyway, so it’s not necessary to check.

“So if you smoke three a day then you have to… steal one every two weeks?”

You scrunch your eyebrows in confusion at this assessment. “No, that’s not right. It’s like once or twice a week depending.” Then you do some weird counting on your fingers for a while. “But even if it was exactly three a week, that’s like six point six or some shit like that. Dummy.”

“Shut up, shithead,” says Kaiser, embarrassed.

“Ok.”

“Leave me alone. I didn’t think about it too much.”

“I’m not even saying anything.” A moment of silence passes until an enlightened remark comes to mind. “Hey, Micha.”

“What?”

You scoot a little closer to him. Kaiser gets nervous at first and freezes, but calms down when it seems you’re not inching your hands towards him. Though the relief is short-lived because then you take an exaggerated sniff of the air and grin. “You stink too.”

He glares at you.

The ball ends up fine. Sure, it’s still beat up and dirty as most things around him, but at least it’s functional enough to kick again, and that’s what’s important.

___

“What now,” says Kaiser with an attitude of being greatly inconvenienced before plopping down next to you on the sidewalk.

You continue counting, trying to keep track of how much money you have on you. A series of gross, dry coughs escapes your mouth. When the fit near passes, you spit on the ground as if to ease your throat, hitting your chest for good measure. Kaiser watches the display with an impassive look on his face. Eventually you turn towards him and ask, “What’s your problem?”

“I don’t have a problem.”

“Ok.”

“You’ve been quiet, not talking to me.”

“I’m gonna go get a haircut so I’m trying to see if I have enough,” you say, figuring he’s wondering about what you’re doing in a roundabout way.

Kaiser rams his head into his knees and makes some kind of noise which you can’t categorize between acknowledgement and disapproval.

You say, “Those children from the schoolyard were telling me having a bad haircut is ‘social suicide.’ Like ‘getting stabbed’ everyday. Apparently it’s the bowlcut that’s really shameful.”

“Other people have such stupid problems,” he says, irked, resentful. “I just cut it with scissors at home.”

“Yeah, man, I can tell. They wash your hair at the hairdresser though, so I wanna go now.”

“You really hang out with them? What do you even talk about?”

You shrug, pulling out a cigarette and then the hideous lighter. The smoke will waft by his nose again and irritate him. It’s unpleasant. The smell he associates with you is unpleasant, but it’s also yours so it’s kind of conflicting. “Recently I’ve been telling them I’m a ghost from the forest.”

Kaiser remains unamused the way you’ve always known him, but after some contemplation graces you with a snort, which makes you smile in return. He asks, “They don’t believe that. Right?”

“Maybe. They’ve got a what-do-you-call-it… You like football, don’t you?”

“A pitch.” He rolls his eyes as if forgetting the word is some kind of crime. Back he goes to frowning.

“Yea, they have that. You should sneak in with me sometime.” You shrug again as if the suggestion isn’t a big deal. “It’s fun.”

His nose scrunches at the thought, forehead wrinkling. It pisses him off just imagining it — truly a sickening concept. Why would you subject yourself to such a thing? Mingling with children who have nice things and an education and clean clothes and probably eat proper meals every night with their families. He doesn’t want to exchange pleasantries with people who can afford to concern themselves with social suicide. Stomach twisted in knots, Kaiser almost hurls, but somehow swallows the bile back down.

“Never,” he denies with finality.

“So dramatic, Micha.”

“Like you’re any better. You don’t care about anything. At all.”

At the sound of his tone getting more sulky than usual, you decide to spare him another glance. “Aww, are you tearing up?”

“No,” Kaiser lies, lips wavering. Unable to hold it in yet desperate to hide, he settles for covering his face with his hands, folding over himself. “I just fucking… hate this place. And I want out so… so bad.” Aside from the muffled sobs, there are also voice cracks littering his admission.

The thing is: you don’t really know what to do to make it all better.

___

Kaiser feels like he’s about to get a cramp from keeping his leg in this position for so long, lifted up and extended. Recently he stole a pair of sneakers from the thrift store, but the soles ended up falling off. Now you’re lathering everything in glue and wrapping it in tape in an attempt to salvage the situation.

“I’m not sure this is how it works,” he says. It’s kind of meek — a pathetic mumble — but you can recognize unwarranted criticism when you hear it.

“Take it or leave it.” You snap off the tape and move onto the next shoe.

When a snarky or otherwise offensive response doesn’t immediately come to mind, Kaiser resigns to silence. He continues observing you while you squeeze out copious amounts of glue. For a moment the only noises between you are those of your sniffles, the obnoxious huffing in of snot.

A few raindrops pour down, pelting your heads at the same time. You hiss when you realize your hard work is about to go to waste while all Kaiser provides in terms of reaction is a blink and a downwards twist of his lips.

“I don’t wanna go home,” you say, sounding distant, which he doesn’t hear from you much — usually there’s a lilt of amusement in your tone, some kind of playfulness lingering in all your words.

“I don’t either. It’s pointless anyway because you’ll get drenched by the time you go home and then there’s nothing to dry yourself with properly and it’s all one huge pain in the ass.”

“Right.” After signaling your agreement with his assessment, you shrug off your hoodie and stretch, trying to drape it enough so that it shields the two of you from the rain. Kaiser accommodates your goodwill by adjusting his position, scooting over next to you and cramming so he’s taking as little space as possible. It’s not an adequate cover by any means and you can tell his shoes will break apart again. But Kaiser is hugging you around the waist, resting his cheek against your neck, and you don’t have to deal with being at your place yet, so it can’t be all that bad.

___

“You look like a pufferfish,” you say unhelpfully.

Kaiser narrows his eyes at you in that way he tends to do which you haven’t seen anyone else replicate exactly. It’s kind of amusing when he does that, especially when one of them is irritated and droopy. “And you look like a spoiled apple.”

“Don’t mind. It’s a lot of bad things happening to me in that house.”

“I know,” says Kaiser.

You rub your cheek and then some more under your eye where the spots are the brightest. It makes him wince because your hands must be dirty, what with everything you two get up to in a day. Since Kaiser’s father strangles him, he’s always swollen and not so much bruised, but he thinks your parents must only leave it at punches while making up for it with enthusiasm. “I kinda like touching them when some time passes.”

“You’re sick.”

“Honestly I was, but it went away. I think I might have an ingrown toenail though.”

“No… I mean in the head.” To emphasize his point, Kaiser reaches out to probe your temple with his index finger. There’s another scratch blooming there, only coming to attention once his focus lands there, but it’s a waste of energy fixating on any of the small ones — he just can’t help but notice sometimes. “By the way, I don’t need to know what kind of toenail you have.”

You laugh, apparently finding his remark funny somehow. Then you reel your hand back before bringing it back down quickly as if you’re about to slap him. Still retaining his common sense, Kaiser flinches and tries to defend himself with his forearm. The reflex is foreign since he usually takes it lying down without moving an inch when it’s his dad.

His reaction makes you laugh harder for some reason, and you don’t smack him at all. Kaiser glares at you for your unfunny prank but you disregard it. Your hands settle around his throat instead, lightly tracing over the purple fingerprints, still fresh from last night. Almost immediately he clenches his teeth, tightlipped, breaking out into a sweat, expecting a harsh squeeze which never comes.

Kaiser wants to scold you for your idiotic behavior, yet he doesn’t. Maybe your hands aren’t for harm, he decides. And then he reaches out too, pressing his knuckle against the darkest contusion on your face. Your eye twitches closed. It turns into a strange fascination then, your skin touching his and his touching yours in places others had hurt. A ritualistic erasement.

___

You’re splitting the money again after selling off another valuable. It was some kind of fancy watch you two stole this time, more ballsy than usual. Once you pocket your share, you ask, “Are you saving up?”

“Yeah.”

“You wanna move? Where?”

Kaiser shrugs. “I don’t care. Anywhere but here.”

You hum and walk ahead of him, probably looking for one of the drinking fountains in the area.

Either compelled by unusual curiosity or bothered by your silence, he says, “You wanna make it the fuck out of here too. Where would you go?”

“To the beach.”

Kaiser rolls his eyes behind your back, finding your answer stupid. Sure, the beach is an exotic idea considering he has never been to one, but all he can imagine is the sand sticking to his skin and the gross seaweed he’s seen in commercials inside stores and such. But on second thought both of these things are probably way less gross than the environment he spends every day in. He lets out a performative huff anyway and says ‘huh’ as if to demand an elaboration.

“I wanna be free like one of those seagulls that fly over the sea. D’you wanna be a seagull with me, Micha?”

“No. That’s dumb,” he says. You ignore him. Kaiser steels his nerves for a second and, after a dry swallow, takes a step so that he’s walking next to you rather than lagging behind. Then he brushes his fingers against yours lightly before making a sweaty, half hearted attempt at holding your hand. His cheeks are warm in a way he hasn’t felt them before. “Take me to your shitty beach someday.”

You make a more competent attempt at hand holding, grasping his fingers in yours until they’re interlacing, and then you swing your arms up and down. Kaiser has enough sense to be embarrassed by this, but doesn’t tell you to stop. He doesn’t know why, but this is the kind of contact he feels the need to savor. “So you do want to be a seagull.”

“Not interested.”

“You’re such a sourpuss, Micha, never playing along with anything.”

“It’s not my fault you make it sound dumb- Well, do you think it’s any use? Hoping for something like that…”

“Don’t tell me you’re giving up.”

“I won’t give up,” he says. “I just don’t know if it’ll work.”

“Come on. We’re gonna get out of here together someday. That’s gotta work.” You lift his arm in the air next and try to make him spin like a dancer. Though Kaiser is used to standing still and limp and letting things happen to him, the attempt doesn’t come out successful. At most he does a slight twist.

“Yeah. Together,” he agrees, like a promise. He imagines messing around with you in the sand with the sun warming his skin in contrast to the perpetual chill he’s become used to. Honestly despite belittling the idea earlier, it doesn’t seem so bad in his mind.

___

Kaiser yawns while sitting next to you on a bench, eating a burger. Since you’re famous for your generosity and kindness and all (not), you decided to ‘splurge out’ by buying food for you both from some shitty hole in the wall. It’s the most filling meal you’ve had in a while. You’re still chewing when you ask, “Are you tired or something?”

He rubs his eyes. “My father was fucking making noises throwing up all night.”

“Ah, your worthless sperm donor.” You nod sagely in acknowledgement.

“Yea, him. It reeked too and when I went to clean it, there were whole chunks in his vomit.”

You scoff. “Don’t clean after him.”

“Not like anyone’s going to clean it if I don’t.” Two more yawns accentuate his sentence. You reach out to throw away the container. For a second you consider keeping the plastic cutlery and maybe washing it at the drinking fountain later, but that seems too desperate even for you. Kaiser says, “I’d take a nap right now if I could, but I don’t want to go back yet.”

“It’s sunny today for the first time in a while. Would be a waste.” You watch Kaiser while he wipes his mouth and his fingers with the napkin. The dark circles around his eyes are worse than usual. “You can lie down on me and sleep if you want.”

“Huh? Really?”

“Yea, it’ll probably be really boring, but I’ll tolerate it,” you allow, ever so charitable.

Kaiser frowns, contemplating. He’s silent for so long, you forget you even suggested anything, but he eventually shifts around and rests his head on your lap, tense. You rake your fingers through his hair. “Don’t smoke,” he warns, but it’s kind of difficult to act butthurt when you’re being so… gentle with him.

“I won’t.”

“Seriously, don’t smoke right now.”

“I said ok already.”

Now that the matter is settled, he decides to trust you and flutters his eyes closed. Though your thighs and the bench aren’t the most comfortable places in the world, to Kaiser who only knows the cold hard floor, such an opportunity is borderline luxurious. The tang of the cigarettes clings even to the fabric of your pants, to your fingers — his favorite smell. You continue stroking his scalp and he dozes off with ease within minutes. Even though he’s snoring already, he moves to wrap his arms around your knee as if he feels a compulsive need to hold onto something in his sleep.

Kaiser looks surprisingly peaceful and precious right now. You hope he’s having a nice dream if any. A long stretch of ennui is ahead of you.

___

The antics have been ramping up as of late. In your defense, you weren’t sure how you were supposed to resist urging Kaiser to break in with you when you noticed the house with the open first floor window, clearly vacant. Though at first he displayed kleptomaniacal tendencies and wanted to rummage through the drawers for anything expensive, you deemed it too risky since you had no idea when the owner would come back. And then you told him you were merely interested in taking a proper shower.

Now you’re almost dry, waiting for Kaiser to finish. You can’t remember the last time you were so free of grime. Wearing the old clothes again almost feels shameful, like a step back. You sniff your armpit like a weirdo and realize your skin smells good .

Kaiser takes a while to come out and emerges looking like he underwent some kind of magical girl transformation. He’s trying to soak up the water from his hair with a towel, sending specks flying everywhere and dripping down his shirt when you blurt out, “You’re handsome.”

In a fashion you’d consider comedic, he stops dead in his tracks to gape at you with flushed cheeks. “What?”

“Your face is pretty.” He blinks. A crease appears on his forehead in apparent disapproval, though you’re not sure what he’s mad about (it’s a compliment!), especially when he’s still blushing. You make a vague hand gesture near your head to clarify your next point, “Try untangling it with your fingers.”

It takes Kaiser a good few seconds to get with the program before he twitches to attempt and follow your advice, but you both freeze when you detect the unmistakable sound of a door closing and locking downstairs. You push him back into the bathroom and close it behind yourself as gently as possible. Then you drag him back to the tub and gesticulate incomprehensibly some more to signal you should both get in and hide before sliding in behind the curtain and reclining on your side. Kaiser follows after you, but you think you might be doomed. It’s still wet, too, which is unpleasant, but not a priority considering the upcoming disaster.

Kaiser opens his mouth to speak, so you clamp it shut with your palm before putting your index finger over your lips. He embraces you, and he’s trembling, and then he hides in your neck as if you’re going to save him from whatever is about to come.

Like you’d assumed, the house owner enters almost immediately. You’re nauseous, stomach clenching. Kaiser is making a stunning impression of a corpse the way he’s not even breathing anymore in his attempt at being quiet. Your muscles are so tense on alert that it hurts and each passing second puts you more on edge.

Thankfully the flush comes and then the running water and then the person leaves with a click. Their footsteps get fainter and fainter until another door opens and closes. You stand and step out, trying not to make a noise still. Before going out into the hallway you throw a glance over your shoulder just to make sure Kaiser is still walking behind you, which he is.

Your movements are slow and light. The escape, especially while making your way down the stairs, is drawn out and excruciating. You hop out through the window you came in from. There you are outside, somehow without incident.

You turn to look at Kaiser again once you hear the rustle of the grass accompanying his jump. With the adrenaline still kicking, you break out into a sprint, eager to get far away. Kaiser catches up to you and you burst out laughing but you’re not even sure why, since you don’t find any of what transpired particularly amusing. A slight smile appears on his face when he recognizes the sound.

___

The next day you notice Kaiser isn’t at the playground, even though he always gets there before you do. No biggie — you can exert some patience.

After a while you start tapping your foot. It’s not like you have a watch to check what the time is or how long it’s been or a phone to ask him where he’s at. So you settle on putting on a show of irritability.

Nothing. Your legs hurt so you go sit down on the swing. You’re getting pretty old for the playground anyway, you think as you pull out a cigarette and light it, eyes darting around. Parents and their children, but no sign of Micha.

You exceed your usual three and end up burning half the pack in your attempt to occupy yourself during your waiting. It relaxes you usually, smoking, when you have a lot of shit juggling around your brain, but it doesn’t work this time.

Did something happen?

… Did his dad finally kill him?

___

Kaiser doesn’t show up at the playground ever again no matter how many times you go.

___

It’s another day where you need to shield your eyes from the sunlight with your hand. You’ve been seeing more of those since you ran away. Must be allegorical or some shit.

From your peripheral vision, while you walk down the street, you pass by a store that has one of those TVs on display, playing a sports game. You spare a moment to look, intrigued, nostalgic in a way — it reminds you of when you were little, when that kind of thing was more common.

They’re playing football, you realize, and you find that evocative too. Some guy scores a goal and they zoom in on him even though he’s not celebrating, instead choosing to stand there like a statue with his arms crossed. Like he’s too cool to get excited, which strikes you as obnoxious.

Then they show his face in full, up front.

You know that face. You’d recognize that face anywhere.

The back of his jersey reads ‘Kaiser’ and yet you never knew him as anything besides his first name.

At first you’re relieved considering you were under the impression catastrophe must’ve befallen him, but the solace doesn’t last long. When the realization hits, your eyes widen and your lips fall into a thin line. It's similar to a punch in the gut how all the air seems to vacate your chest. All this wind around you and you can’t get any.

The only person you ever loved left you behind without a second glance in your direction.

___

II.

Michael Kaiser is mildly inconvenienced. Billions injured on the scene and millions more will die.

So maybe he’s been ranting at someone who he didn’t even glance at, eyes closed, mind way too lost in his reverie. A part of his brain doesn’t even comprehend he’s in fact speaking to a person instead of a cardboard cutout. It’s to his complete shock and bafflement when after so much babbling he receives a reply. “Hey, Mr. Kaiser was it? Shut the fuck up.”

He flutters his eyes open to give the ingrate a glare and speak his mind some more, but he freezes on the spot at the sight in front of him. His blood runs cold, heart stuttering in his chest.

He’d know that face anywhere, even if right now it’s more unamused and neutral — nothing like the expressions in his memories. He’s not sure why his body is reacting like this either, tensing up with a nervous jitter in his system.

Wasn’t he supposed to have left all that stuff in the past? Yet a single look at you is enough to cause this response: this uncertainty, like he’s still a little boy who veers towards hopeless and incompetent, and fuck, why are you giving him such a dead stare?

Do you not recognize him?

Do you not love him anymore?

It’s a rash thing to focus on as his immediate concern especially when he hasn’t been killing himself with worry over you or anything during your years apart, but right now when you’re in front of him it’s all he wants to know. Which is cruel and selfish in a way, in his specific Kaiser-ish way, how he’s first preoccupied with himself before he wonders about your state of mind or living situation. A need to bait for a sign you still care about him torments him even if it might be drastic right off the bat.

When no ingenious idea for such a thing comes to mind and Kaiser realizes he’s been staring at you like a moron, he says, “Don’t call me Mr. Kaiser. It makes me sound old and decrepit.” And that isn’t what you of all people should be referring to him as.

You continue assessing him in a manner which can be described as judgmental at best. “Isn’t that what you said your name is during your little monologue?”

“You already know what my name is.” The awkward silence which follows is almost unbearable. Kaiser scratches himself on the neck even though he’s not itchy just to pass the time. Finally he snaps, “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

“Sorry to break it to you, sir, but most employees anywhere aren’t happy to listen to ten minute long demented tirades about non-problems.”

“Well maybe I overreacted a little,” concedes Kaiser and gives you what he thinks is a suave smile in an attempt at downplaying how uneasy he is. He thinks you can feel it. He thinks you’re doing it on purpose, hurting him with intention. “Are you seriously going to act like you don’t know me?”

Your pitiless gaze sticks to him like glue even when you take out the ice cubes and throw a generous amount into his drink before sticking a paper parasol in it with lots of spite, which is what the big stink he threw a tantrum over was all about. Kaiser wants to tell you that you’re very hot when you’re no longer a starving punching bag, but thinks better of it. Doesn’t seem charming even coming from him. 

“There.” You slide the cup across the counter towards him. “I fixed your shitty smoothie.”

“It’s not a smoothie!”

“A mocktail is basically juice.”

Wrapping his fingers around it, Kaiser doesn’t leave. Instead he chooses to stay and observe you in silence, jaw clenching.

“You can go.”

“I’m not going until you admit you know who I am.”

“What, are you famous or something?” you ask, bemused.

Kaiser is on the cusp of hypertension because you’re doing it on purpose and you’re not even doing it well because you want him perfectly aware of what you’re up to. You’ve never done this — hurt him before, let alone by design — so Kaiser almost assumed you were incapable of it. Though it makes sense that you are. After all, you’re the same type of inhuman he is, and he’s done this if not worse hundreds of times, and even reveled in it. Yet the realization you’re not what he remembers of you stirs disillusionment within him. The nature of it, he doesn’t quite grasp.

Kaiser contemplates causing a scene more than he already has, but he’s not sure how to do so while still getting what he wants. Trying to joke even though above all he wants to throw a tantrum, he whines, “You’re so immature.”

“I’m sorry that my reaction to getting threatened with a lawsuit over ice cubes was immature, Mr. Kaiser.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about!”

Your exterior remains listless and vacant, and Kaiser wants to scream the longer you scrutinize him in this manner. Eventually you spin your finger near your temple as if to call him delusional, then move onto taking the order of someone else.

His eyes narrow until you’re so blurry he can barely see you, perhaps either to censor you from his sight or because a milder expression wouldn’t suffice in communicating his disdain. With a final grit of his teeth and maybe a visible vein on his forehead, Kaiser stands up to leave. Fine. You win this one, but it’s war now.

The scorch of the sand under his feet startles him. He kind of forgot how hot it was, what with getting so distracted. Another comeuppance on a list of many. Today is punishment.

Dramatic inner soliloquy aside, Kaiser makes it back to the beach bed quickly, still reeling over that interaction. You’re here? You’re here, in front of him again, and apparently you’re not too happy to see him.

In the most disinterested tone he can muster, Sae asks, “Did they fix your smoothie?”

“It’s not a fucking smoothie!” With the grace of a lobotomized koala, Kaiser drops it over the small table separating them and barely resists the urge to hurl it at Sae. This would do wonders for his mental health short term, but again he’s trying to feign decorum.

With his trademark deadpan, Sae pretends none of that just happened. Kaiser turns around to look back at the hotel bar where you’re gesticulating at your coworker. Both of you seem immensely annoyed, wild and animated while you converse.

“Fuck, they’re totally complaining about me.”

Sae follows the line of direction through which Kaiser is stalking you. After a few seconds of analysis, he says, “Those are definitely the ‘this shit stain just threatened to sue me,’ ‘wow, really, what the hell’ faces.”

Kaiser snaps his head to look at him with genuine surprise. “What- How’d you know?”

“... You’re so embarrassing, it’s predictable.”

“And you’re annoying,” he says. “I’ll tell Coach to get rid of you and airdrop me Ness.”

“It’s cute that you think the coach cares about your opinion on me enough to replace me. The same as thinking the strippers at the club like you, in a way.”

There is a while of silence where Kaiser’s just snarling while Sae seems like he couldn’t give less of a shit. Then he adds his finisher,

“Or I guess in your case it’s like thinking the bartender actually cares about your order.”

Oh, fuck this vacation.

___

The heat is unbearable.

You step out into the sun and saunter up the wooden path to take your break away from the beach. Sweat has been exuding from your skin for the last few hours. Even so when you make it to the sidewalk, you keep your eyes trained on the scenery as you trudge on to your destination. The sand, the sea, the plants — some natural and some artificial.

Before long your legs take you to your usual street vendor, where you’ll order a shitty pancake that won’t do much to nourish you, but it’ll be so sweet that you’ll be too nauseous to get hungry for a while. The queue isn’t unbearable.

Not until you sense someone hovering behind you, followed up by a hand settling on your shoulder. You turn around to grace the offender with a disgusted side glance, but you’re so baffled to see Kaiser there, you just… freeze.

He’s sneering at you. In fact he looks so happy with himself, you want to vomit. Preferably on him.

“What a coincidence,” he says without even a sliver of shame.

You roll your eyes and face front again, deciding it’s in your best interest to feign ignorance to his existence. Taking this as a sign to elevate the antics to a more obnoxious level, Kaiser resigns himself to the role of one of those domesticated leeches, hanging off you now, fully wrapping his arm around your shoulders. His gaze is burning into your side profile to the point it’s unnerving and you can feel the artificial smugness emanating from his form.

“I thought we were done talking yesterday.”

“Really? You did? How naive,” he coos at you mockingly.

It is convenient that during this time of need — when you’re lacking a good comeback — your time to order comes up. You talk to the guy working about your aforementioned shitty pancake. The moment you shut your mouth, however, Kaiser starts listing off things you’re not even keeping track of like you’re hanging out together or something.

With a mild dispute over whether it’s ‘backwards’ that they do not accept payment through a card, which makes you want to die because you’re a regular here and now the employee who knows you by face will associate you with this pest, Kaiser pays for your thing, too. On the one hand you’re prideful, but on the other you’ve lived the life of a bottomfeeder who takes every scrap they’re given without question, and it’s the kind of conditioning you can’t let go of. So you allow it.

He ends up with an inordinate amount of food in his hands, too much for one person to eat. You’re still doing your ignoring shtick even when Kaiser pulls you down to sit next to him on the table. Content with pretending he doesn’t exist as he is dead to you, you bite onto your food in relative peace, mind drifting somewhere else. Until he speaks that is. “This must be our fateful meeting.”

“I don’t see what’s so fateful about it if you followed me?”

Unbeknownst to you, Kaiser too is adept at the ‘hearing only what he wants to hear’ game. So he moves on with the conversation without any indicator of comprehending what you just said. “I think it’s quite ironic, actually.”

“What are you on about now?”

“You told me you want to go to the beach once. And where do I find you? On the beach. It's an astral influence, I’m sure.”

“Ah? I don’t remember telling you that.”

You’re blinking at him in mild confusion. This hurts Kaiser a hundred times more than when you were deliberately going out of your way to act dismissive of him because he can tell you mean it. To think one of the moments he clung onto the most had slipped your mind.

His eyes are wide and his lips stand still in a thin line, so he forces himself to smirk again and glosses over the information which just shattered him. “So you admit you know me then?”

“No, Mr. Kaiser, I have no idea who you are. I’m thinking you should admit yourself to a hospital. They say false memories are an important symptom in psychopathology.”

“Very funny. I prefer Micha or at least Michael, though.”

“Do I give a fuck?”

He scowls at you. “Yes.”

You finish off your pancake and wipe your hands with the napkin in mild disgust. Kaiser laughs at the wrinkle of your face while you do so, and then he scoots an inch closer.

“Help me finish it all off.” He gestures at all the paper plates.

Pinching between your fingers, you tug the first thing that seems appetizing closer to your side of the table. Kaiser scoops up some of the portion for himself and dumps it in another meal. You ask, “Why are you trying to suck up to me?”

“Aw, is it so wrong to want to treat my closest friend?”

You scoff. The movement of your eyelids fascinates Kaiser — you never really showed any annoyance towards him before, so he finds these expressions of distaste fascinating even if they make him sick. “We haven’t seen each other in four years, so if I’m still your closest friend somehow, that’s just sad. Be for real if you’re gonna be anything.”

“You’re being so difficult! What did I even do?!” To be honest, he’s lying and his gaze isn’t even shying away from you while he’s lying, not even a twitch. He knows you, so he knows that you’re mad he couldn’t be assed to tell you where he went even though he obviously could. He thinks playing dumb might be more in his favor here, though, so he’ll do that. “I don’t even like going to the fucking beach. I’ve been going every year to different places searching for you.”

The unbridled perturbation on your face upon hearing this is quite amusing. Priceless even. You were calling him crazy merely for the sake of fucking with him, and perhaps it was your earnest attempt at gaslighting him but you’re not about to admit it. Right now, though, you think he is genuinely insane.

“You’re saying that to appease me,” you accuse, hoping you’re correct, but also not. The idea he might’ve thought about you like you did about him while you were separated enthralls you, though you can’t let him win you over his bullshit.

“Maybe,” says Kaiser, trying to be mysterious.

Since he obviously wants you to ask him for an elaboration, you deny him the satisfaction.

“How much do you make working at that shitty bar?”

“Enough.”

“I should take you back to Spain with me,” Kaiser decides. With too much confidence at that. “You’d have anything you could ever want.”

It is not like it was before. He’s not acting the way he used to. You suppose you aren’t either. But anyway, you thought it inconceivable that he would ever joke — is he joking? — or make the absurd statements he’s been making. It’s natural, in a way, since you’re also not of the same temperament as before.

With a huff, you say, “You’ll never be my sugar daddy, Kaiser.”

“You’re no fun nowadays.” There’s an amused lilt in his tone while he sneers — you think the way he smiles is fake. You recall he was kind of quiet and awkward and stilted, unnatural at first maybe because he was out of practice in communicating with others, but now he speaks with insincere charisma, like a showman. Yet still the things he says so casually are off-kilter, ruining whatever illusion he’s attempting to sell. “And I said to call me Micha.”

“I don’t need to call you anything.”

It’s all about the metamorphosis. It’s about becoming each other so you’re never truly apart.

___

You’re crouching under one of the tropical trees overlooking the road by the wooden path leading down the beach. The shade is insufficient and the heels of your feet are digging into your ass to the point it hurts. Before your break, the thought of smoking a cigarette had entered your brain so you obeyed it as it was too pervasive even though you don’t enjoy lighting up anything during such weather, believe it or not.

Your eyes are glossy since you’re spacing out, taking puffs. When two silhouettes come to a halt right in front you, only then does the absentminded trance end.

Kaiser waves at you with unnecessary enthusiasm which is just for show. They’re late, arriving way past their usual time. Earlier when he and his companion didn’t show when you expected them to, you assumed maybe their vacation ended and they’d headed home.

The other guy is sullen, but at least his eye lashes are long, which must count for something. After sparing you a glance, he turns towards Kaiser and says judgmentally, “You’re still harassing staff.”

“I’m not har-”

Not giving a shit, the other guy straight up leaves, not bothering to participate in the discussion on a topic he brought up. You watch in mild bafflement as he walks off without a care.

“Ignore him,” Kaiser says. A plastic smile overtakes his face before he squats down next to you, butting into your body with his and almost toppling you over. This is probably bad for his knees, and you’re half exposed to the sun now. Somehow he has created several problems where there were none. “You still smoke.”

You don’t reply, but maintain the common decency not to blow any in his face. He should stay away from you. Isn’t he an athlete? Shouldn’t he be cautious about secondhand smoke? You consider putting it out altogether, then, so you stub it in the almost empty can of the fizzy drink you’d been drinking earlier.

“What kind of lighter do you have now? Has your taste gotten any better?”

No response again. He places an arm around your waist. Through touching you so often it’s like he’s trying to hammer it into your head that you were close, and yet intangible things seem to evade Kaiser, so maybe he’s struggling to conceive of any other way to reestablish your connection.

“You still smell the same. Like nicotine.”

“Well, you smell the way you used to, too.”

The space between his brows wrinkles and his nose twitches in irritation at your words. “The fuck do you mean? No, I don’t.”

“Let me spell it out for you in a way we both understand.” For the first time since your strange reunion, you reciprocate the physicality and pull him in by the shoulder till you’re forehead to forehead so you can look him in the eyes while explaining. “When I saw you a few days ago for the first time in so long, it was like you basically still had a sign that says ‘broke ass bum.’”

He gapes at you with incredulity, this offended expression on his face.

“I mean,” you say, snickering in bewilderment at the absurdity of his previous actions, “you were gonna sue me over some ice cubes, really? Acting like a spoiled little prince to disguise where you crawled out from? I think you and I have got the kinda stench not even all the Dior in Avenue Montaigne can wipe off.”

His fingers would’ve dug hard into your flesh if your shirt wasn’t in the way with how his grip tightens in response. The grit of his teeth exposes more of them. Strangely, you think he has nice gums. “Why the fuck are you being like this?”

“‘Cause you were content to forget all about me, but you don’t want me to be angry at you either. You should’ve just been polite and pretended you didn’t recognize me. But no, you want it all. I hate people like you who make no sense.”

“You’re just jealous,” Kaiser accuses, trying the snobby angle. If he’s pretentious then he’s not hurt by you claiming you despise him. At least that’s what he settles on.

“Sure. That could be true as well.” You stand up and take the can with you to throw away.

Kaiser plops down on the sand, tired of squatting, and doesn’t bother watching you plod back to the bar but the sound of your footsteps rings heavy in his ears until it dissipates. He hugs his knees like the wet wipe he is at heart.

The kindest person he’d known was a scammer and a liar and a thief and who knows what else. It hurts like nothing else to bear the weight of your desertion.

This must be cellular rejection. You should’ve been ecstatic to see him on account of your shared inhumanity. Does it not matter to you anymore, the fact that you and Kaiser are the same?

… Right; you’re not the ball. When he hits you, you can hit him back.

___

The beach is desolate and eerie at night. Kaiser came out to brood, which was fine because Sae didn’t care to ask him where he was going when he left the room. Unlike during the day, the sand is cool under his feet now — what an obtuse observation to make, all things considered. He’s annoyed and frustrated at himself as usual when things don’t go his way.

There’s a light illuminating someone’s face where they recline on one of the lounge chairs. It’s blue, meaning the source is a phone. Kaiser startles because he assumed he was alone.

And you startle when you see him staring at you in the dark, but instead of screaming all you do is let out an unconvincing gasp and turn on the backlight to reveal him. Kaiser covers his eyes with his forearms and turns away, letting out some vampiric kind of noise.

Then you frown and go back to tapping away on your shitty mobile game. “You’re such a creep honestly,” you say in distaste.

Once he gets over the assault you just committed on his admittedly sensitive eyes, Kaiser sits down next to you uninvited.

“It’s a coincidence,” he snaps. “I don’t want to be around you either. You’re so fucking exhausting. Can’t talk to you like a normal person at all because of your stupid grudge.”

“Then why are you still trying?”

Of course, there are many answers to that question. Some including but not limited to I think I can still love you like before and I miss you and I regret not sending you that postcard and I hate how you’re mad at me, but I can’t seem to get it right. Though such pathetic things aren’t in Kaiser’s nature to spew, so they never make it past his throat. The words constrict around his neck like a noose.

Instead of answering, he says, “You’ve got a phone now. You should give me your number.”

“No.”

“You’re just trying to make my life difficult for no reason!”

You give him another one of your blank stares. In the dullness of the night, obviously the gesture stays meaningless, though Kaiser can sense the bemusement in your silence at least.

Seeing that ignoring the problem at large isn’t turning out to be the winning move, Kaiser sighs and tries to think of what to say. There’s probably some kind of trick to this, some way he could fool you into overlooking his transgressions. Though when you were friends, he never did that to you, and you never left him then. Maybe it’s not necessary. In this situation, it’s proving to even be detrimental.

Kaiser picks at the skin on his neck. It’s to his benefit you can’t see each other well — he’s not sure he’d be able to spit it out without the detachment of the environment. “Listen, I’m not good at this shit, but… If I have to be honest, I was really paranoid. I didn’t want to think about the past and I didn’t want to get dragged back into it, so I was too scared to even write you a letter to tell you I’m fine. But stumbling on you again, it’s probably fucking stupid but I don’t want to lose track of you anymore. It’s lonely.”

“I wasted a year of my life thinking you were dead,” you say.

“I’m sorry.”

“Tomorrow’s my free day.”

There’s an uncertain excitement in Kaiser now, as if you might be yanking his chain and he doesn’t want to commit to the feeling right away. “Sure, I’m leaving after tomorrow, so that works. Meet me here and we can catch up.”

“I see this shitty beach enough as it is,” you say.

“Yeah, but not the way you’re supposed to.”

You shrug.

Without prompting or any indication that you care, Kaiser says, “I have a horrible sunburn.” He will always find something to bitch about. It’s like he’s never satisfied.

After a few swipes, you unlock your phone and pass it to him so he can add his contact information. “Then use aloe vera or something. What are you, stupid?”

“I don’t have any,” justifies Kaiser, inputting the digits. His tone is defensive because this is the first he’s heard of it, but it’s not like he’ll admit that.

Your forgiveness is fake, in a way. It’d been a grudge you held for a while and a betrayal you wouldn’t tolerate from anyone else. Maybe you’ll hold it over his head if he displeases you. So it’s not real forgiveness, is it, more so a lenience, a testament to your past, that your love for him somehow prevails over your need to enact the lex talionis.

___

The sand sinks under your weight with each step you take, waves lapping over the shoreline, seagulls and children squealing in the background. Sunset makes everything easier on the eyes and the heat is finally settling down since it’s getting late into the afternoon.

You had a nice time catching up with Kaiser in another part of the city, although he displayed a susceptibility to tourist traps. He gloated a lot, and you pretended you didn’t know about half of it from reading his Wikipedia page that one time when you were fostering your hate boner for him. You told him about how you ran away and ended up in another country and about how you’re still on the missing persons site.

Now you’re going back by the seaside instead of through the streets. You walk side by side, your ankles touching the water. Kaiser’s grin is wide, which makes him seem smug, but this time it doesn’t strike you as forced so maybe he is simply carefree. It’s an unusual sight for you — Kaiser, genuinely smiling.

“I think I’ll come see you again when it’s off season. Or maybe we can arrange for you to come visit me instead. I’ve got all sorts of things I want to show you,” he says. He never really had anything to give you before, and now he takes pride in having the means to do so, regardless of whether you’re interested or impressed.

“Whatever, Micha. You’re so full of it. I bet it’ll be lame or you’ll forget you promised.”

He remains pleased despite the teasing, even happier if possible. “It’s fine if you say pointless shit like that, I don’t mind a challenge. All I have to do is prove you wrong.”

___

Lol at the end of finishing this I teared up in Frustration because I couldn't write this the way I envisioned it and then I couldn't save it through editing either (<- guy who's defiinitely normal and casual ) and I kinda just wanted to be done with it so I'm not gonna hold it hostage any longer either. Idk I'm just mad and depressed about it rn i guess. Thank U all for tapping in

[gunilslaugh]

a small soft drabble of the reader reacting to ot6 changing their hair color!! I thought of it since Gaon changed his hair color again 😭

All members •_ ^ - ^_• Summary: You reacting to Xdinary Heroes' new hair color. (idol au) WC:825 Warning:none

I wasn’t quite sure how to write this, so I'm sorry if it sucks.

photo not mine credits to owner.

Gunil

The door cracks open catching your attention. You turn your head to look at the door from where you’re currently sitting on the couch. In walked Gunil and you immediately notice the different color of his hair. 

“You didn’t tell me you were changing your hair,” you said, standing up from the couch and walking over to Gunil. 

“I wanted to surprise you. How does it look?” He gently looped his arms behind your back. You reach your hands up to inspect the freshly colored strands. “It looks good. I like it,” you say with a smile. 

“And I like you,” he says. 

“What?” you laugh. “I would hope since we’re dating,” you added, still laughing a bit. Gunil smiles. 

“I just wanted to tell you.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead. 

Jungsu

“Are you trying out every shade of blonde or what?” you asked, coming up to Jungsu and ruffling his newly dyed hair with your hand. Jungsu laughs, catching your hand in his.

“I’ve had brown and black hair before,” he defended. He pulls your hand away from his head.

“You’re right, but you like blonde the best don’t you?” you checked. 

“I think it looks good on me,” he states. 

“It does, but with your handsome face I think any color would look good on you.” You cup his face in your hands. 

“Don’t exaggerate.” He tried to hide his blush.  

“Yeah, thinking about it, neon orange would be a very hard color to pull off,” you note. 

“Yeah I’m not that bold,” he states. 

“I’d still like you with it though.” You kiss his cheek.

Gaon/Jiseok

“Oh it’s actually dark blue,” you say as Jiseok sat down next to you. “I thought it was black at first,” you tell. 

“Is the blue a disappointment,” he joked. 

“No,” you chuckled. “I think it’s better actually. Like a fun surprise,” you smiled. 

“I thought so too,” he told you. 

“Did you lose a bet or something though?” you questioned. 

“Does it look bad?” He looked at you slightly worried. 

“No. It looks great. I just feel like in Xdinary Heroes you’re the one who dyes their hair unnatural colors the most,” you explained. 

“I’m just the fun one,” he bragged. 

“Well keep being fun then I like it.” You brought your fingers up to play with his blue hair. 

“Whatever you wish.” He leaned into your touch.

O.de/Seungmin

“Why didn’t you tell me we were getting a blonde hair Seungmin,” you say, taking in his lighter colored locks. 

“Cause I’ve been blonde before,” he chuckled. 

“But that was when your peach hair was fading. This is on purpose. It’s different,” you state going over to him to get a better look at his new hair. Seungmin chuckles at your reaction. 

“Well do you like it?” he asked playfully. 

“Yeah I do.” You playfully tickled him with his own hair.

“Stop.” He caught your hand in his, making you pout. “You like playing with my hair that much?” he teased. 

“Mhm, it’s fun,” you say. Seungmin shakes his head, but lets go of your hand, letting you resume playing with his new hair.

Junhan/Hyeongjun

“You have officially gone full emo,” you state aftering seeing Hyeongjun with his long black hair. Hyeongjun softly chuckles at your reaction. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked. 

“Nothing, I’ve been waiting for this moment. It suits you so well,” you tell him. 

“Thanks,” he says. 

“Come here. Let me get a closer look,” you waved him over. Hyeongjun can’t help but smile at your excitement about his new hair. 

“Do you like it?” you questioned, looking at his darkened strands. 

“Yeah, I’ve been wanting to do it for a while,” he tells you. 

“It looks good. Rockstar vibes,” you say. 

“You mean an emo rockstar?” he joked, making you laugh. 

“Yes, an emo rockstar in the best way possible,” you state. 

“So you think villain’s will like it?” 

“Oh they’re gonna love it.” You nod your head affirmatively. 

Jooyeon

Jooyeon comes and takes a seat beside you at the table and you have to do a double take.

“I did not recognize you for a second,” you laughed. Taking a moment to look at his new hair.

“Wow, you can’t even recognize your own boyfriend?” he says quasi-offended. 

“It’s not my fault I got used to your long hair.” You brush your hand through his now shorter locks. “You dyed it too,” you say. 

“Do I really look that different?” he asked. 

“At first glance yeah, but you still have the same pretty face, so not really,” you squished his cheeks. 

“You have a pretty face too.” He squished your cheeks back. You two sit there like idiots smiling while squishing each other's cheeks.

“Does this mean I get comeback spoilers?” You raised your brow. 

“I don’t know what’s in it for me?” he challenged. 

“Kisses,” you say. 

“Deal.” He smiled brightly.

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