#if you're curious as to why i would want to i'm not averse to a question | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yostresswritinggirl · 2 years

Text

Fall Into Place

: Cyno x Reader short fic

Or, the scholar everyone thinks is deranged for being able to stand the General Mahamatra, despite being reprimanded by him several times already.

"Someone said they spotted the General Mahamatra on campus!"

"What? Cyno's here?" Your casualness and curious tone had the scholars looking at you with obvious bewilderment. Staring at you like you're an undiscovered Aranara.

"You know, it's still baffling how you're... 'close' to the General after everything that's happened." One of your friends finally spoke up as you started gathering your materials, the thought making you snicker from undisclosed memories.

"He's not that bad if you don't do anything bad." They had a retort ready on the tip of their tongues. "'sides, he's just doing his job, right?"

Not wanting to elaborate and hoping to catch up, you lugged your bag over your shoulder and said quick goodbyes, bounding out of the House of Daena with a new goal in mind.

It's not like their suspicions/bewilderment aren't uncalled for, after all the things you've been through with the Matra, your Vahumana friends are starting to suspect you may have been cuckoo from the stress of researching.

But as they are wrong with reading your character, so are they to him.

Really, he wasn't all that bad.

"What have I done wrong?"

A pause. "Your paper."

A blink. Another. And another. Cyno watched as your head shot up from shamefully looking at your lap to stare at him in disbelief, wide-eyed not in fear but in the incredulous emotion you felt upon hearing his words.

He was about to explain the joke after he had felt himself accomplished on making you less aversive - but a muffled snort had made him speechless this time.

There you were sitting across him in the Matra office, covering your face to hide your snorts and wheezes. Cyno now had disbelief clearly written on his face.

"Sorry, sorry." But you didn't have to be, his expertise in judgment knew your reaction was genuine. "You just caught me off-guard, General."

"I'm glad you're loosening up then." There you see the first rare sight of a smirking Cyno, more proud than condescending as he crosses his arms at his achievement. "I know there's more that you want to say, I suggest you not to hold your peace if you think it will do you good on your judgment."

At the resumption of the topic at hand, the ever attentive General watched as your expression turned to that of annoyance. It wasn't out of anger or resentment whatsoever, specifically not towards him either. He knew there was something else at play here in the way you held back your tongue when you wanted it to run.

And now, perhaps with the lighter mood, you'd be more willing to share the details he isn't privy to.

"I just think that this is unfair." You gesture around the office that only held you two, continuing before he could misinterpret. "Why am I the only one apprehended when it's the committee who agreed to my bribery?"

He closed his mouth. To this you continue.

"Clearly, if they had refused such a simple bribe, the crime wouldn't have been a thing, right?" The review committee shouldn't be accepting bribes in the first place. "In all honesty, I wasn't even serious about it. I didn't think they would accept in the first place since it was clearly a joke."

"What exactly was the bribe?" Cyno sits up straighter upon meeting your deadpanned stare, a lingering pause that made him tense in curiousity.

"That I'd cook them some of Mondstadt's mushroom skewers."

A blink. Another. And another. If not for the exasperation in your voice, he would have thought it was a lie - but somehow that made it even more funnier, and now it was you patting yourself on the back for making the General laugh.

"I think -" he wipes a stray tear as he finally caught his breathe. "I think you have been scammed."

"I think so too." Humming to himself, you watched as he pulled out a set of stamps and ink from under the table. "I'm positive they knew the Matra would be able to catch on with how horrible my research is, so they tried to at least gain something from the endeavor."

"I can see the appeal, Mondstadt's delicacies are quite enjoyable." Stamping the paper with a CASE CLOSED, his red eye caught on to how you perked up at his words. The implications you immediately caught on to. Smart. "You must make some mean skewers, but in research writing..."

Your gaze lifts from looking at the paper to his awaiting look, pausing again for the dramatic effect. "It seems you have mushroom for improvement."

The case was easily swept aside without further need for punishment due to how light it was. The review committee had a stern talking to and you focused on a new work.

Cyno had to praise your resilience to bounce back to the groove of things. But you explained that the loss of the half-cooked research wasn't that bad, after all, you only made that under the pressure of passing one.

You've also reasoned that the horrible quality was mostly due to how you dislike the research topic to begin with (but it was the only manuscript they approved).

When Cyno didn't buy it, you made it your mission to prove him wrong by making your next one a success.

Even if you were practically shoving your passed thesis on his face to goad him, he couldn't help the tiny smile creeping to his lips. Both from your achievement and how you're open with him.

The next time you'd seen the General under work-related conditions was on the highest point of Sumeru.

There were reports of illegal climbing and gliding on the Divine Tree but the culprit had yet to be reprimanded. Somehow he had an inkling of who it could be, and as such, he climbed his way up the branches as quietly as possible.

And as he suspected, your back profile greets him as you focused on adjusting the wind glider on your person, looking out at the far horizon of Sumeru.

"This is highly dangerous territory, you know," his firm hand grasps your forearm as you almost slip from the scare. "Especially at night time."

"Cyno?" At the feeling of your hand on his, the General retracts his hand and stands next to you, also looking at where he assumed you were gazing at. From this distance, there isn't really anything he can pinpoint. "Lemme guess, they sent you up here. That doesn't really make sense."

This isn't Matra work, after all.

"Why are you up here?" It wasn't styled like an interrogation but more out of curiosity.

"Well," just from that start alone, he already deciphered that your words would be a lie. "I wanted to see if I can reach Vanarana from here."

That was such an absurd plan and an absurd lie that even Cyno had to look at you with obvious apprehension on his face, his gaze you were too tired to make eye contact with to solidify your lie.

When was the last time he had seen you this close? Despite the scarce lighting filtering through the leaves above and branches below, he could see the darkness under your eyes. The furrow of your eyebrows too deep for something as leisurely as gliding, the tension in your jaw and shoulders too tight for the calming caress of the Sumeru night winds.

He's heard that you've been working on your research after becoming a Dastur and so he made sure not to disturb you when you looked busy. Which was all the time now.

Perhaps, he thought as he looked forward once more, this gliding sessions were your unorthodox way of destressing.

"Who do you think is the slowest glider in Sumeru?" Snapping out of your daze, you tilt your head to level your gaze with Cyno.

"Who?" It was styled and paused the same way he did when telling a joke so you thought none of it.

But when he flashed a smirk at you, you were taken aback when he jumped of the branch and deployed his own wind glider (which you didn't even see he had equipped), waving at you. "You are."

And then it clicked in your mind. With an offended (but fake) gasp, you did a running jump and followed suit, spreading your arms in hopes to overtake him. "How dare you!" You followed with a laugh upon seeing his determination to race you, a smug grin evident even from a far angle.

That night you learned that it was impossible to reach Vanarana from the Divine Tree.

And the next day, Cyno reported to the Akademiya empty-handed, the culprit unseen. He then went on to scold them for even wasting his time for such a 'useless ordinance' and that there were no rules in the cardinal sin that was violated.

While leniency has been offered to your nightly outings, Cyno started suggesting for safer stress-reducing alternatives. Have you heard of TCG before? Ah, no matter, he'll gladly start from scratch.

"General Mahamatra!"

The two Matras conversing turned to your approaching form, waving your arm excitedly to catch their attention more. While the subordinate didn't look too pleased with the interruption, his annoyance was slightly dispelled at the sight of the General waving back.

"Still maintaining that cover up? I told you -"

"Cyno." You corrected with a weary sigh, him looking rather pleased. "I heard you were here. Ah, sorry if I interrupted something important! I was too excited!"

The Matra would have been more irritated about the disturbance if not for the fact that someone, a researcher, just admitted that they were looking forward to meet the General.

As well as the reprimanding look his superior gave him upon reading his next move.

"Nabil, we can continue the conversation later."

"Y-Yes, General." And that was his cue to leave.

It was easy to fall into step with the General as you two conversed about everything that had happened since you last saw each other. While he had more interesting stories than you, he'd always listen attentively when it comes to your progress, whether it be about your curiousities or your deck-building.

"Is it safe to research about the natural behaviors Rishboland Tigers in their natural habitats?"

"If you are asking about whether it is safe to conduct such experiments without risk of being expelled, then it would be so long as the animals are unharmed. In terms of the dangers however, it would be best to consult Tighnari about such affairs."

"Thank you!"

While it was no easy feat to be this close to the General, at the very least, there are perks to it such as confirming the research topics of your friends for their safety from the Matra.

Even if it seemed so unbelievable to the other scholars, it was always refreshing to see Cyno be preoccupied from staring down the students everytime he was there.

Unbeknownst to them, even with his eyes following you closely, he was still ever so vigilant to notice the little things.

Perhaps the right word should be... merciful.

Just whipped this outta my ass so I can post during my birthday, take it and let me rest

#cyno x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #exile.flower #gender neutral #genshin impact fluff #sumeru arc #genshin impact #cyno

1K notes · View notes

on-leatheredwings · 20 days

Note

i've found your account only a few days ago but ever since then I've been STUCK here rereading your fanfics, especially ones with damian. i wasn't even a dc fan (heard about some stuf, watched some films and cartoons, but that's it) but now im reading comics since im Obsessed and need more batboys in my life (rip my productivity😔)

Anyway, after Sleepover i'm curious what will Bruce (and maybe even Thalia) think of batboys strange behaviour towards reader. He's smart, so he definitely notices it early on, but how he'll react....

I can see him being weirded out (like he was by Jason's anger issues, before his death), but he also can be an enabler, since Robin (literaly any of them) had a hard life, so if those relationships can help him why not pretend that everything is normal? you'll be safer in a Wayne's Manor anyway

All in all, thanks for a new hyperfixation 💞💞

P.s. About games:

1. Boyfriend to death 1&2 - since you're into yanderes you might want to check this game out. I prefer the second game, but the first is also fun. But beware the trigger warnings!!

2. Long live the Queen - more of a raising sim than dating sim but you still can romance some guys and girls.

,3. Hatoful Boyfriend - mostly a comedy, but there is a yandere.

4. The Royal Trap - it's been a long time since i played it, but it used to be one of my favorites so i'll just mention it.

5. Higurashi - once again not really a romance sim, but its an interesting horror mixed with a slice of life

;A; AWWWW THANK YOU IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE MY STUFF.... THAT MAKES ONE OF US GIJSDOFAFGHFOJDSD

and yes yes get into DC!!! (girl who hasnt even read a full run since like. injustice)

damn now you got me thinking and excited. incoming spiel

i agree entirely about bruce just knowing how Bad things can get, so to make things simpler, he's like "yes, your darling(s) can stay in the manor, boys. 🙄"

mmm yes..... when it comes to bruce noticing the batboys are yandere, i think it's always sinfully delightful to just have him be reluctantly okay with it. 😈 it's also easier narratively ngl but i also like the idea that the batfam is all just corrupted.

bruce's thoughts are that they (his sons) fight for vengeance and justice but this is where they could use some leeway.... we all need our vice... they fight so hard for gotham, they deserve a little treat (getting rid of your human rights)... it's very "Dad who wants his sons to have happiness even if its not healthy" of him. in fics where bruce is a yandere, well, he's the exact same way so he can't judge. although if that's the case, i like the idea of bruce just being like "yes what we do isn't right. let's not talk about it. just don't kill <3"

still wondering what i like more. a yan!bruce who's self aware what he's doing is wrong but he just refuses to think about it. or a yan!bruce that justifies it all because of his paranoia, Tower of Babel style (if you don't know, that's when it's revealed batman has plans to subdue/kill the justice league just in case they go rogue.)

for the batboys depends on their personality... for damian, he's so resolute in things that i prefer when he just believes 100% what he's doing is okay, if not actually righteous. ^_^

hmmm talia.... I'M STILL UNSURE HOW I PREFER THAT AS WELL... i think talia being a you-arent-good-enough-for-my-son mom is a little cliche but also. she kinda would say that. you'd have to prove your worth somehow but idk how tf darling would do that LOL. in the end, i think talia is just relieved/comforted that her son indeed feels desire and wants love and will continue the family legacy (regardless if youre afab/can biologically have children.)

no THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!!! AND THANKS FOR RECS!!!! heheh yeah ive checked out btd and im not averse to the warnings its more like im not that most of into the designs ngl. fox guy seems cute? AND LMAO FUNNY BC IM ON A HIGURASHI REWATCH (never played it tho)

#yandere batfam #ask

41 notes · View notes

whinlatter · 5 months

Note

The movie ootp showed this differently, but in the books, Sirius doesn't really show much physical affection to Harry. In book 4 he helped Harry to a chair, and held his shoulder, but when he left bc Dumbledore told him to (weird on it's own but that's my opinion) he parts from Harry with a handshake. When Harry stays with Sirius in ootp he isn't described at any point to have hugged him, expect a quick, hurried, half hug at the end of the Xmas holiday. I always found this curious, because the intensity and even co dependency that these two have is huge. Harry relies soo much on Sirius, Sirius does so much to be in Harry's life but that emotional affection never translates into a physical thing. Molly is the first to give Harry a bear hug when he needs it most. Maybe I'm missing something? Harry is far from a physical boi, I know. Maybe it's me, I'm Dutch, English culture is quite different than my own Dutch culture in ways of interaction, we never adress someone in last names, that's considered very rude here for example. We are very direct and familiar, even with authority and family. What do you think of this? Is this JK not computing Sirius's character in every scene or is there a reason I'm just missing? I just wish Sirius and Harry has more physical moments. My Dad and uncles hug me all the time, families do that, I'd just think Harry's Godfather would be familiair and safe enough to hug more than just one time. Their emotional bond seems to impy so. Sorry for the long ask lol. I'd love to hear someone on this!

this is a super interesting question, thank you so much!

i think you're totally right that it's striking how little physical contact/affection sirius and harry share in the books. (film sirius is king of the cuddles). i don't think this is an oversight in the text, but something quite deliberate, both as a characterisation choice for sirius, which i'll get into below, but also to set up something that's still 'missing' in harry's relationships - loving physical affection with a loved one - even after sirius comes into his life, that will be, in part, resolved by ginny.

you're right, i think, that cultural factors do come into sirius' lack of comfort with physical touch towards harry. sirius is a posh english man born in 1959, which would be enough to make for a pretty repressed character prone to limited displays of physical affection towards friends and family members of all genders at the best of times (not huge huggers, that lot). but sirius also enters the series in the canon timeline after twelve years of intense physical and emotional isolation, living in a body that's been through a lot and must be uncomfortable and sometimes painful to inhabit. sirius is arm in arm with james in the marauders photograph on his wall at grimmauld, and at james' wedding, so it's entirely possible he was more comfortable with physical contact prior to azkaban - the kind of breezy, easy display of contact he does on occasion to show to harry that's a bit reminscent of ron (a clap on the back, a hand on the shoulder, a handshake) - and reasonable to assume that an ease with such physical displays of affection might be something prison cost him.

i also think, though, that the physical distance sirius keeps from harry is supposed to be a sign of more complex and difficult parts of their relationship (sirius' attempts to maintain some distance from harry so as not to make harry feel responsible for him emotionally, sirius grappling with the guilt he feels for his part in lily and james' deaths and subsequent inability to be able to protect harry from all that he's endured since). harry wants more displays of affection from sirius than sirius feels he can comfortably or easily give (it's why i've never been much on board with fanon reads of harry that have him as someone touch averse - he seeks and accepts physical contact with friends and loved ones throughout canon, particularly in the later books). harry even seems to experience these moments of one-armed hugs and handshakes as disappointments. sirius, of course, would prefer to show his devotion and love for harry in other ways, including putting himself in danger to protect his godson, which harry increasingly doesn't want him to do by ootp.

for harry's sake, the absence of much physical touch in his relationship with sirius bolsters this sense of something still missing in harry's life even while sirius is alive, and serves to imbue moments of physical contact with other parental figures - and eventually in his romantic life - with greater significance. this is especially true, as you say, with molly. that GoF hug means a lot to harry, and the big hug he gives her in DH after the birthday present is supposed to be an important moment for both characters, but especially for harry's feelings for molly as a maternal figure. meanwhile, in harry's romantic life, it's striking how little he and cho ever actually touch: they have one (seemingly weirdly hands-free) off-stage kiss that harry recalls as quite physically unpleasant, and harry has to give himself a fifteen minute pep talk to try and hold her hand (flop). so then when ginny finally comes along, the reader's supposed to be like, oh damn, finally harry potter's getting a hug or two (and, you know, more than that, but the physical touch love language point still stands!)

#meta #sirius black #ginny weasley #hinny #sirius black giving himself a pep talk to give his godson a pat on the back #orion black shook sirius' hand on the day of his birth and never touched his son again

63 notes · View notes

merakiui · 6 months

Note

Mera you were COOKING with Monops's reflection, ty for the meal 😩

Do you have any ideas on what happened to reader after what Jade did to them? Do you think Floyd would be upset?

AAAA thank you for eating the meal mwahaha!!! It's a story that was from early 2022 if I remember correctly, so I'm happy I could finish it. I initially abandoned it because I wasn't content with Jade's characterization in the fic (i.e. I felt I'd written him too monstrous and crazy), but now I see that last year's Meraki had yan!Jade figured out before she even realized it LOL. I'm glad it could be a scrumptious meal!!!!!!! >w< I love Jade when he's downright deranged and sick with obsession. <3

I left the ending open to interpretation, but here are a few possibilities I thought of:

✧ Jade nearly kills you (or he does indeed kill you) after biting deep enough into your throat. Or you simply bleed out and he doesn't patch you up; just sits by and watches with that same smile on his face.

✧ he does indeed clean you up after everything and now you're essentially stuck with him because who (aside from Azul and Floyd) is going to believe you or even listen to you if you try to tell anyone what Jade did? Although in the fic it's shown that Azul has friendly relations with you, so perhaps he'd be willing to lend a listening ear (don't expect him to do anything, though; he has no interest in getting mixed up with Jade's personal interests).

✧ Jade's ruined Floyd for you, so now whenever you look at Floyd you think of Jade (and vice-versa), so essentially you're now terrified of both twins (which is exactly how Jade wants it). Maybe you break things off with Floyd as a result, or maybe your sudden lack of interest in Floyd causes him to lose interest in you (or he just pursues you even more than he did before because he's curious. Maybe he starts obsessing over you as well (not what Jade wants).

✧ you quit the lounge to put distance between yourself and the twins, but maybe Jade ended up knocking you up and so now you're even more doomed than before. :(

✧ the trauma of it all makes you averse to all kinds of physical touch. Perhaps it even sparks a fear or distrust in men for you, which makes attending classes even harder for you. But no one's going to help you. Not when the twins are involved. The names Jade and Floyd are enough to have anyone turning the other way; no one wants to get involved.

As for Floyd, part of me imagines he's just as messed up as Jade is in Monops's Reflection. T_T he's sweet and soft to you (mostly), but there's something he's not showing you. :) after all, he and Jade are cut from the same cloth. But then I also think Floyd sort of,,,, suspects it. He's observant; he's had to know Jade's had his eyes on you for a while now and he's had to known this was an inevitability. Perhaps that's why he didn't show up to the lounge and was conveniently off elsewhere during the timespan Jade has you to himself. Maybe he wants to see how far Jade will go.

Floyd cares about you, yes, but not enough to stop his brother or even warn you about what's coming. Whereas Jade only cares about the idea of you, about the concept of having you all to himself for his own enjoyment, Floyd cares about you only if you're entertaining him. In the fic he offhandedly remarks that it's boring when you're not around, so when you're not near him he's bored and has lost interest. When you are there, he's hooked.

In short, both eels are terrible. Would not recommend. </3

#twisted chit chat #reader: not a lot going on around here... let's see what's behind this door #*opens it to see jade and floyd with those crazy toothy smiles*#reader: *shuts the door* yeah..... no... is there a better door around here? ;;;; maybe...

62 notes · View notes

mj-iza-writer · 7 months

Text

Whumptober Day 17 Dehumanization; pet whump. Enjoy.

You're the lump in my throat and the knot in my chest / collar / touch aversion / "Leave me alone"

Whumper lay comfortably on the couch, strolling through their phone with one hand. The other hand held the throat of their pet, not to choke or punish, but to remind.

Whumper wanted to feel every breath Whumpee took, every swallow. They wanted the control to be able to stop everything in an instant.

Whumpee kept their eyes trained straight ahead, not looking at anything in particular. They sat quietly on the floor, feeling the hand move nonchalantly around their throat. This was a normal occurrence, as long as they did nothing but behave, the hand wouldn't hurt them.

Whumpee knew they shouldn't have any thoughts besides obeying their master. But something, a question had been on their mind for a few day now, but did they have the right to ask?

Whumpee cleared their throat, but did they dare ask for something from Whumper.

"Mas-master", they whispered.

Whumper's hand gripped gently.

Whumpee shook nervously.

"You may speak, my hand will remain on your throat", Whumper turned their full attention to Whumpee, "I like the way your voice feels."

Whumpee nodded and took a breath, "I'm sorry master, I apologize for asking, but what does a collar symbolize."

"It normally symbolizes ownership between a master and their pet or slave depending on what subject you are looking into", Whumper trailed their finger up and down Whumpee's throat, "why are you asking?"

"A few days ago when Master Collin was here, I heard you both talking about collars, and how they just gave their pet one finally", Whumpee paused.

"Yes, Collin said they felt their pet had earned it finally", Whumper grinned, "it was a well earned gift."

Whumpee looked down sadly, "oh"

"Is there a reason you are so curious?", Whumper released their grip, "turn to face me."

Whumpee turned to kneel in front of Whumper, they kept their eyes to the floor.

"Well?", Whumper sat up, "is there?"

"I apologize master, but is there a way I can earn a right to wear a collar", Whumpee bowed to kiss Whumper's feet, "may I earn that gift?"

"Do you think you've earned that gift?", Whumper reached for Whumpee's throat again.

"N-no master, I just hoped to be able to earn it", Whumpee whimpered, "I hoped to learn what I could do to please you. So you would allow me to wear one."

"Hmm", Whumper stood, "wait here."

Whumpee waited while Whumper went to a different room. They could hear them rummaging through some bags.

'Now you did it, you've upset them. Now instead of resting, they have to punish you. You couldn't just lose the thought and be obedient', they yelled at themself.

Whumper came back a few minutes later carrying something.

Whumpee bowed. "Master please forgive me, I didn't mean to make you upset. Please forgive me, I will take any punishment happily."

"Shh, you're not in trouble. Actually", Whumper revealed what they were carrying, "I purchased this a few days ago when Collin bought theirs, I was holding onto it for the right time, I guess this works."

Whumpee looked at the item, then realized what it was.

"I-is that a collar Master?", Whumpee smiled excitedly.

Whumper walked back over to the couch and sat down. They smiled at Whumpee, "it is, I think you've put up enough with me lately. I believe you earned this."

"I-I have master, you mean it?", Whumpee looked at it excitedly, "thankyou master, so much."

"You're welcome", Whumper grinned and began to put it around Whumpee's neck.

Whumpee stretched their chin up to help Whumper see. They heard a clinking sound.

When it was in place Whumpee reached up and felt their gift, they noticed something metal hanging from it. They looked up in confusion.

"It's a name tag", Whumper reached for it, "most collars have one, it has your name, my name, and my phone number in case you get lost."

Whumpee listened intently.

"Now remember pet, this gift comes with rules, if those are not followed I may have to take it away until you earn it again", Whumper smiled, "am I clear."

"Yes master very clear", Whumpee grinned as they felt their collar again.

Whumper reached for Whumpee's throat, "and it doesn't take the place of my hand holding your throat, I will do this whenever I want, am I clear?"

"Yes Master, I am your pet, you own my body", Whumpee bowed their eyes.

"Good pet", Whumper patted Whumpee's head, "enjoy your new gift."

Whumper sat back as Whumpee reached up and felt the collar again.

Whumpee bowed to the floor again, and kissed Whumper's feet, "thankyou master."

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all. @villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived @sacredwrath @porschethemermaid @monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz @bloodyandfrightened

#whumptober2023 #no.1 #pet whump #collar #oc #writing #dehumanisation #whump community #whump stuff #whump writing #whump ideas #whumpee #whump #whump scenario #whumper

55 notes · View notes

yourlakebed · 7 months

Text

okay, I'm a little bit scared to post this, but I think I finally have the right words to write a concise and clear post about my thoughts on asexuality (although the topic is still complicated).

upd: well, at least it was planned as concise...

let's start with what a huge number of people stumble over. if we put the term 'sex-repulsed' into google, the first article on the link will tell us that:

"'sex-repulsed' typically refers to people on the asexual spectrum who experience some form of sex repulsion. Some ace-spec or a-spec individuals may be repulsed by the idea of sexual activity or any sexual situation.

The term indicates that a-spec person experiences sex repulsion meaning they find sexual activity disgusting or repulsive. Some people are repulsed by the thought of engaging in sex altogether, while others may be disgusted by some sexual activity but not all.."

though it is not entirely wrong, articles like these that make a direct correlation between aversion to sex and asexuality do a lot of damage to the perception of asexuality. cause what if I told you that asexuality is not an umbrella term for "people who don't have sex/who hate sex"?

asexuality is about the absence of sexual attraction. it's not even about a lack of libido - there are a huge number of asexual people with a high libido. i.e., we can't even say it's about "people who don't want sex." no, because

it's as simple as that - it's about people who do not feel sexual attraction.

It took me a long time to explain how exactly this works even to myself and now, it seems, I finally got it (the final straw was actually Good Omens, with its incredible representation of asexual characters (yes, I'm talking about Azi and Crowley, and no, I'm not in any way dissing other headcanons for labeling them differently, and even more so - I don't see why these headcanons have to clash)).

so I came up with pretty simple example - comparison to food/hunger. it may be a dangerous one because sex, unlike food, is not a "basic human need", [despite the claims of some men who justify sexual violence by referring to their "basic need for sex/reproduction🤡"].

but anyway, this is how this food analogy works:

imagine you're a creature that doesn't need to eat at all. therefore you never feel hungry - you simply do not have such a function as being hungry. you were made that way. you can try food if you're interested or you can not. let's say you tried it, but it was.. well, it was okay, but not that you would do that every day. and suddenly you tried pancakes with raspberry jam, and you really liked them, and now you eat pancakes because you like the taste. and you think, "well, if I liked the pancakes so much, then maybe I'll search and find another one"...

and so your journey continues, and sometimes you find some new "dishes" that you like... or maybe you don't find them and move on. that, my friends, what asexuality is like!

I have asexual friends who love bdsm and are into the kink culture, because for them it is like a delicacy or some exotic dish. there are friends who simply don't care and don't want to try anything. I have friends who are curious and plan on trying to find their "raspberry jam pancakes". there are those who long ago found their comfortable "dish" and eat only that one. there are those who like the way one particular person cooks, and like the smell when you sit and watch that person cook, and like the very fact that that person cooks for you.

and people who are disgusted by sex, or even the very idea of it (sex-repulsed people) are most often people who have a certain trauma that has nothing to do with asexuality. and the combination of these two terms standing beside each other creates a terrible stigma around asexuality.

I am infinitely grateful to everyone who read this, because this is a very important topic for me personally🖤🤍💜

#asexuality #asexual #good omens #I'd actually like to specifically talk about asexuality in good omens some other time #neil gaiman #aziraphale #crowley #aziracrow #asexual community #lgbtq community #lgbt #lgbtqplus

74 notes · View notes

34saveme34 · 28 days

Text

okay so since the night came, my head ache isn't so bad anymore and I can think a bit better now

so. stupid ass crack theory but

hear me out. the reason both 3 and 4 react at the mention of the igloo ISN'T because of the gay sex, or at least not fully!

I can already hear yall being like whaaaaat, Nicc, are you out of your mind? Trying to pull some tricks here or something?

But nope. No, I'm not, I'm being 100% genuine with that claim

so, a few things- it's a very special episode, especially with how it's placed, I saw some people talk about how the ending was shocking in a sense

and yeah, I get that, that was the sort of humor that was in the videos at the time and it really leaned into that, even in writing sense, I do think it's a great episode, even though I don't care That much for classic smg4 (I watched episodes from it but the gmod era grabs me more, it happens, I also like physical comedy a bit too much)

anyways- my point is, especially after seeing this one post on twitter

I didn't think that hard about it before but this really did it for me

"it's time for some smg3 and smg4 quality time together....trapped" doesn't this seem....yknow....

it sounds like a shitty ship fanfic description

hell if you look at the video that way, it's kind of written like a fanfiction, with the cliches, the enemy shipping, the sudden ways the plot develops. Characters acting out of character in a way

the make love line from 4, it very much sounds like some shitty ass line from a wattpad fanfic that leaves me ranting at my friends because I hate it so much yet I continue because I'm morbidly curious

the thumbnail has a specific feeling too, as if they were grabbed for it like "okay!!!!!!!!!!! you guys are gonna have a gay moment and you're gonna like it!!!!!!!!!!" and they're just like °_°

so my point is- this episode feels like a fanfic parody

aaaaand, when you look at it that way, isn't it interesting how they react at the mention of the episode the same they react to Those kind of fanfics? It would sort of explain 3's weird averseness of it, yet still considering it a moment that he blames for getting too soft

yknow. that's. still really hard to explain without making it gay

so Idk about 4, but I think 3 didn't mind the gay sex just perhaps the plot. and also the. privacy of it all. Like besides fanfic vibes, it's still embarrassing to be revealed like that to the public.

Yknow, thinking about it more with 4, I think he would probably regret it less today, like even these days it might come into his mind, like a core memory, and make him confused, like how the elevator implied that he finds 3 pretty Rizzful (and hot) and it might explain why he propositions Just Like That in Snowtrapped

Maybe one day they will do it off camera and we won't know because they don't want to repeat the same mistake

#smg4 #smg34 #btw you're free to disagree if you want but yeah #I think this kind of describes my feelings about the episode pretty well

20 notes · View notes

herotome · 4 months

Note

Hi there! I’ve been following for a fair while (I was interested in the premise) and have been meaning to play the game for a while as well, but only started the last day of 2023! One heck of a way to start a year though!

I was wondering, how would the ROs feel about/interact with an MC who is touch averse? If MC can’t stand for people to touch them without getting a little sick feeling? How would that affect their relationship? Would that be a thing that would determine if they would or would not enter a romantic relationship with MC?

And maybe as a lil tiny bonus if you’re feeling up to it, how would the ROs feel if MC one day tried linking pinkies with them? If MC told them that their specific touch isn’t that bad and they wanna try slowly building up physical affection?

Sorry, this is kind of a long ask >.< I myself am iffy on touch at best and I know it’s commonly seen as a “necessity” in relationships of all kinds. Herotome is a VN that kinda breaks down modern relationships and I was curious so I wanted to ask, but alao totally understand if you don’t want or are unsure of how to answer this. Have a lovely whatever time it is in your time zone and I can’t wait to see how Herotome progresses!

Dude(gn) you're valid as hell thank you sending this over <3

I do wanna give a quick shoutout to @crescencestudio who - I know through my direct experience of editing for Alaris - is putting a huge array of touch-averse dialogue options in their VN. Do give them a follow if that interests you...!

I also want to express how flattered I am that Herotome kinda breaks down modern relationships - that's definitely been an unstated goal of mine.

Now let's see about your ask...

Warden: Fuck yeah he's down-- gosh what's gotten into me I'm cursing so much today but I'll make an effort not to censor myself <_< But yeah... honestly a touch averse MC would be right up his alley - assuming he is reassured that he has not done anything wrong/offensive with any accidental touches. To some extent, he enjoys the concept of self-restraint(...) and begins both his professional and romantic relationships rather carefully - so not having to worry about whether he's not touching someone too much or too little - and instead focusing on not touching them at all - should be quite refreshing for him tbh? He may want to touch sometimes, particularly after spending a LOT of time together... but being respectful and ensuring his beloved is comfortable is way more important to him.

Griffin: ..... well, Griffin would do her best LOL. They would have to set expectations and really communicate upfront (which you would always be doing with Griffin regardless of touch aversion, lets be real) - what is not on the table, what could be on the table in the future, what MC wants out of a relationship - and if MC is prepared to discuss these topics and - most importantly, if MC is 100% ready for a relationship - in all likelihood a touch averse MC will be able to make things work with Griffin. Just gotta be clear and communicate.

Mia: ngl she can get pretty needy, it might be rough with her...! She'll want to hug when she cries and she can get pretty insecure about herself, so I wouldddn't super recommend a touch averse MC getting into a romantic relationship with Mia... Communication can be rocky with her even when both sides try their best. But gosh she'd treat touch averse MC sooo well in the time they spend together, if MC would allow Mia to cook and pamper!!!

Dart: Eh.... Why not? He's willing to give it a shot, and if it doesn't work out then it doesn't work out. ....... I'm sorry this is all he's giving me ;;;;;

Jade: lmao she's touch averse on and off herself so she'd understand MC best out of everybody with very minimal communication no questions necessary. They'll be perfectly happy reading on opposite sides of the couch or something...

As for linking pinkies and slowly building up physical affection-

lol idek what to say bc that's so stinking adorable and swoonworthy

Warden, Griffin, Dart, and Jade would make sure MC is not pushing themself over their comfort zone just for their sake - they went into a relationship knowing not to expect touch (I assume?!)

Mia would be too busy having the happiest day of her life straight up vibrating and also having a heart attac like

#creatorofstars #ro: everyone #herotome ask #can I promise a full set of touch averse choices in my own game no #are touch averse mcs valid hell yes #both can be true at the same time

38 notes · View notes

reikunrei · 10 months

Text

okayyyy so i made a post abt this last night that was just a short ramble trying to piece my thoughts together but basically... i’m just really curious how will’s (possible) powers might manifest and what they might be, and i’m trying to like. reason out how i feel about them and what i personally think would be cool or fitting...

lots of people have talked about this before (like user pinkeoni has made some really good posts abt it, and i think heroesbyler has had good discussions abt it too) and what his powers might be, and a lot of them revolve around creation or light, both of which i’m very fond of

this isn't so much a theory or prediction as it is a "these are things i noticed and i think this would work well with the themes of the show" type of spiel. it ended up way longer than i wanted it to and goes off on multiple tangents because i can't stop myself, so i'm putting it under the cut lol

it's more just for me to try and articulate what i'm feeling about it, but if anyone actually reads this mess, you're more than welcome to share your thoughts :3

with the creation stuff, it automatically makes me think of the UD taking the shape of hawkins... because we know that henward grew to hate that town so why would vecna shape the UD to look like the place he hated? i suppose it could be bc he wanted to take revenge on the town, so why not daydream about it and destroy your scale model of it to get some catharsis, right? but... then it's frozen on the night will went missing? it’s possible that the UD could have simply taken the shape of hawkins when the s1 gate was opened and made the two worlds touch, thus making the UD a true "mirror" dimension of hawkins. but i also really like the idea of will getting sucked into the UD, panicking, wishing he had his hiding places to go to to escape from this monster chasing him, and poof! now he's in hawkins and all of his hiding places are there (he's good at hiding!) but it's still the "wrong" hawkins

but anyway, i want to move on to the "light" angle because there's so many things that i love about the possibility of will's powers taking the form of some kind of light to counteract the darkness created by vecna and the UD ("hide in the light" thank u max)

i especially think it would be cool for it to take the shape of some kind of fire or flame, even if the powers themselves don't behave like fire, like it's just a stylization choice to give some sort of visual that the characters and audience can see

i don't recall if there's any specific moment where any version of henward/vecna/001 or other characters talk about burning or fire as a form of destruction in a metaphorical/symbolic sense, but we see it enough of it literally throughout the show. fire is a means of causing pain, of killing, of destroying

season 1, nancy and jonathan think to burn the demogorgon to a crisp because, hey, that'd be a pretty effective way to kill something, right? so they carry that theory over into all the other seasons

season 2, we see hopper using his lighter to maneuver through the tunnels below hawkins, and the vines flinch away from the flame. we see owens and the lab using fire to cull the "weeds" still growing out of the gate. we see will react physically to the burning, feeling the pain through the link with the hivemind, and requiring it to be cold in order to not be in physical agony

season 3, uuuh i can't remember any direct usage of fire against the fleshflayer other than the fireworks, but that's more about the explosions than the flames imo lol. but we do get the sauna test (best s3 episode hands down mwah love it) and the aversion to heat that we see in billy and also in heather, though less prominently

season 4, we get murray's killer flamethrower scene and hopper using the flaming spear to keep the demogorgon at bay. our hawkins crew relies heavily on use of fire (flambé) in order to take out vecna's physical body

so there's just a lot of fire and fire as a means of destruction. but i can't help also thinking about how fire isn't purely a means of harm. fire keeps us warm, it brings us light in the darkness, it cooks our food and brings us health. the sun, a giant ball of fire, is essential for life to exist on earth. i especially keep thinking about how wildfires are a necessity to the planet, and in places like healthy grassland ecosystems, fires are crucial to burn out old growth to make way for new, fresh green, which the animals there then rely on. letting old growth continue to sit and dry out and die isn't good. it has to be removed completely so that new grass shoots can take over

(not to mention that allowing for controlled burns and letting wildfires run their course in a regular system ultimately allows for fewer, less destructive wildfires to happen. if there's no old, dry growth to burn, then there's less stuff to catch on fire)

how does this tie into the show, though?

to me, it makes me think of the concept of simply living with your trauma, not talking about it, and pretending everything is fine, when all that's doing is creating more kindling for a bigger, more destructive fire. it makes me think of season 2 and the conversation will has with jonathan about how everyone keeps treating him like he's gonna break, and the instructions joyce and hopper got from owens to just "treat him how you normally would." you can ignore trauma all you want and pretend everything is fine, but it's going to be more destructive in the long run. instead, letting him talk about it, listening, letting him burn things down a little bit, will be healthier because it'll clear out that old, dry grass clogging everything up and leave a clean patch of earth for him to build back up with new, healthier growth. you can take a weed wacker to it all you want, but those old roots are still there

not to mention the way they get rid of the mind flayer is to "burn it out of him." they literally let the "fire" run rampant, cranking up the heat to make his body inhabitable to the mind flayer, clearing out those nasty "weeds" so will can grow on his own (more or less) unimpeded

and then there's the s1 flashback scene between will and joyce where he's drawing will the wise shooting green fireballs. joyce asks, "why does he need fireballs if he's so wise? can't he just outsmart the bad guys?" but will explains that sometimes the bad guys are smart too, so he needs the fireballs

only here, they're green because he doesn't have a red crayon. this specific tidbit makes me think of how will's powers are currently repressed in some way. at that time, it was possibly because his powers "hadn't come in" yet, if we want to follow the idea that powers are a symbol for puberty or coming of age

he hasn't "found his flame" yet, so to speak (which is what got me thinking about all of this at all last night bc of the song 'find your flame' from the sonic frontiers ost the absolute slapper that it is) and at this point it's obvious that any awakening of his powers will happen in s5 when he's no longer being suppressed, much like how he currently has to suppress his true feelings, or how he's been unable to move on from what happened to him in s1 and 2

he has to use "fireballs" because sometimes the bad guy is smart. sometimes the bad guy has a trick up his sleeve (like *checks notes* literally not being able to die) and your original plan won't work. you can stock up on weapons, you can create as many sneaky ambushes as you want, you can solve all of the bad guy's riddles, but sometimes you need the fireballs

and, once again, we come back to how i feel like will's powers won't be literal fireballs, or something he physically wields. when it comes to el, henward, and kali, as well as the other powers that we see from other subjects, it's all something that they do. and here's where i start to struggle with how i want to articulate what i think about will's powers...

to me, will's possible powers aren't a weapon in the way that we've seen other powers used, or at least framed as, a weapon

like... i guess i do think that it's something that he can "do," but it's less "i'm going to move this thing with my mind" "i'm going to go into your head and walk through your memories" "i'm going to make you see something that isn't really there." like, he himself, his person, his mind, his essence, his intent, is the power. will byers is the light. why else constantly bask him in rays of sunshine, hm?? lol

again, i want to touch on the possibility of the UD hawkins manifesting simply because he wanted it to. he didn't think about it, he didn't deliberately go like "okay and now this house is here and this place is there" it simply... was. it just happened without much of his input other than a vague wish and panic

if we want to make it into something more deliberate, it makes me think of lio fotia in promare. the movie is basically about this group of people who suddenly developed "burnish" abilities, where they contain fire and have some sort of fire powers. they're persecuted by the rest of the planet, and are treated as terrorists and locked away in prisons and experimented upon. the fire, or "promare," inside of them is a double-edged sword, where they supposedly rejuvenate their bodies, but if they don't let it burn, it instead kills them and they turn to ash. spoilers i guess (you should definitely go watch this movie i highly recommend it), but near the end of the movie, lio is taken captive by the antagonist, kray foresight, and our other main chara galo thymos tries to save lio. kray lashes out using his burnish powers and tries to burn galo, but lio launches his own flames toward galo to protect him. when galo's firefighting team finds him, he's on fire, but he doesn't notice because the fire doesn't hurt him. it's a special kind of flame that doesn't burn! in the end, in order to save the world, they have to let it fully burn one last time, and galo and lio work together to wrap the entire earth in a massive wave of fire, and it's fire that takes the form of water. it engulfs everyone, but everyone realizes that it doesn't actually burn

i'm getting off topic but !! now we start getting less into "will has fire powers" and more "his powers are light and warmth" instead. like lio and galo's combined powers and intent (that's the other thing, that final big burn is different than the rest because of the intent behind it), it's not actually about the fire, it's about its purpose

he needs the fireballs to fight the bad guys, but in the case of our "bad guy," literal fireballs don't work. henward's past is a complicated one, and a lot of where he's been led was caused by his lack of a proper support system. he was villainized for being different. even when he was found by someone who "cared" for him, it was for that man's own personal gain, not because he actually cared about henward

henward was only ever burned and then left in the cold. nobody gave him a second chance like el, nobody listened to him like will. he was forced to fend for himself on his own in the darkness. he came to rely on the darkness. vecna literally focuses on the darkest thoughts of his victims in order to gain enough power to open gates. and sure, focusing on negative emotions gives all of our characters with powers some burst of strength

but then we're shown that love is what makes them even stronger. focusing on happy memories, memories of friends and loved ones, memories of the love itself, is what allows el to overpower 001 in the lab and to close the gate in s2 and to break billy out of his tether to the fleshflayer. and even in that final showdown in s3, she's not using her powers. she's burned out. in that moment, it's not the powers themselves that save them, it's the message behind it

will's whole character is about love and understanding. he puts himself last consistently, he puts the needs of others above himself, and he does not know how to be a little bit selfish when it comes to his feelings. he's sensitive, he's kind, he's artistic, he cries easy, he relies on his friends and family to feel safe and loved, and without them, he feels lost and hurt and alone. and there might be ups and downs, but he gets that love and support from them. they always have his back. he knows what it's like to feel pain and to suffer, but to have people who will stay by your side unconditionally through it all

and that's something he can offer to vecna and his alternate versions. he can offer that love, and that warmth, and that light in the darkness. and once again, i think it would be neat if it was less of a literal flame or source of light, and that it was will who is the source of light. like, he is the example for henward/vecna to see. he's the proof that despite all the bad shit there is in the world, there are people who will still love you anyway. there's people who will listen to you and care for you even if everyone else shuts you out

and even if it does take the form of something literal, of an actual flame or glowing ball of light or more of those glowy particles, it's not a weapon like the other powers we've seen

it's also about just shining a light on all the good stuff that's mixed in with the bad stuff. again, there is no black and white (thanks brenner, you fuck). henward was miserable in his life, he hated it and was frustrated that he felt trapped in a cage, and he only saw all the bad in the world. he couldn't see any of the good mixed in (ie. the possibility that he was friends with scott clarke as a kid, or even the fact that victor was really so caring and loved his son so much) because he just assumed it was all bad and he'd have to start from scratch to get any of the good he wanted

even focusing on the negative thoughts and feelings of his victims, vecna was able to be evaded by thinking of happy memories that took place at the same time as the bad ones. "hide in the light." again and again, we see max use memories, both past and present, to free herself from his clutches. good memories that still exist alongside the bad ones. and if vecna acknowledges that there's still good mixed in among the bad, his whole source of power, the foundation for his plan, completely crumbles

if will's power has to do with light, then he'll be the one to shine the light on all of the good memories that henward had mixed in among the bad. and this isn't to victim blame this 12 year old boy who was miserable and didn't know what else to do, but it's instead about his lack of support system, and how it's understandable to have grown so jaded, but that doesn't mean everything is bad, and there's still a chance for him to come back from it and change his way of thinking

henward was a wildfire waiting to happen, and rather than having someone to let him burn a little, to let out his anger and listen, he was trimmed back and suppressed. he had his old growth left there to dry out, which only added more kindling. he was never given the room to bring in new growth

and then to really tie in the use of fire to match the theme of "no black and white," i think about avatar the last airbender, and specifically the sun warrior temple that aang and zuko visit in the final book. in book 1 of atla, aang tries to learn firebending and jumps in too quickly, ends up burning katara's hands, and swears off ever learning firebending because he doesn't want to hurt anyone with it. in book 3, zuko offers to teach him, but aang is still very timid about it because of that incident in book 1. zuko also finds his firebending ability diminishing, and they surmise that it's because he no longer has this drive to find and capture the avatar. that was his source of power, his purpose, and now that it's no longer his purpose, he has to find the true way to master firebending. so, the two boys travel to the sun warrior temple to try to find answers. there, both zuko and aang admit that they really only see fire as something destructive, but the sun warriors remind them that fire is warmth and light and life. fire can be destructive, but it is not only destructive. it's something beautiful and necessary, you just have to respect it

feels pretty fitting for stranger things, yeah?

so, to wrap this all up before i go fucking crazy:

i personally think that will's powers will predominantly take the form of fire or light

i do also still adhere to some of the creation power theories, but it also wouldn't be crazy for him to have more than one power, right? after all, el can use telekinesis, track someone's physical location, and go into their minds. that's 3 pretty different things that she can do!

will is directly tied to the behavior of the lights in s1 and called back to in s4. throughout the show, and especially in s4, will is basked in sunshine on multiple occasions. sure, those instances are mostly about his bond to mike, and how mike sees him in this halo of light all the time...

but that still ties into the theme of love. those rays of light are about mike's love for will, and vice versa. but that kind of unconditional love and acceptance is something that will have to be extended to henward and vecna. therefore: light is the key

and again, it just feels very fitting to have the key be something like fire. something that's so often villainized and only seen as bad and destructive, when it truly is something that's misunderstood. unchecked, it can run rampant and cause pain and grief, but when respected, it can bring life and healing, for lack of a better word

so far, we've only seen fire used as a means of harm. it does keep our characters safe (ie. hopper's flaming spear, the flame thrower, the moltovs, etc.) but it is wielded as a weapon first, when it doesn't have to be

fire can cause pain, yes, but fire is also passion and love. light is something to be extended, to help people find their way out of the darkness, and i just think it would be really cool to see vecna, who's always shrouded in darkness, or henward who hid away in the dark attic surrounded by candles, to have a ray of warm sunshine like will byers hold out a hand to him and try to help

#okay i think i just need to stop lol. i could keep going and pull up actual evidence and stuff but #again this isnt really a theory. this is just something that i think is cool and worth thinking about irt his powers #and how they might manifest or be revealed in s5 and what their intent is #bc i could go on and on about how i feel about how will having a LACK of powers could be really cool and meaningful #but like. come on. it's really obvious at this point that he probably does have powers #so i wanted to try and reason it out to see if i could find a way for it to fit in a way that makes it really solid for me #will byers #stranger things #i say things

57 notes · View notes

jessanight · 4 months

Note

Hey, I was scrolling through the offical pale beyond twitter account and found these sprites. During my playthroughs I didn't see them at all, so are they possibly unused? And if so are there a lot of unused sprites that didn't end up in the game? Just curious, because the game's art is amazing!

Hey there, good eye @niko-trash!! Thanks so much for asking, but this is probably going to be a longer answer than you anticipated, sorry!

Yes, there are a lot of sprites that went unused in the game. Kurt has the most emotes total I think, and therefore the most unused emotes too - the final count for him is well over 100, he's an expressive man.

Most of the reason why we made too many emotes was that a lot of them were designed before there was a script! We knew early on that we wanted a lot of emotes, and drawing usually takes longer than writing, so we started early. At this point the game design for Pale was more like a true visual novel, and we had yet to add many of the resource management mechanics, so we thought we would have to lean pretty hard on conversation emotes being important for basically everything.

This led to a lot of work being done without the full context of all the scenes that would be in the game. We made our best guesses, but it didn't all end up fitting! In hindsight some of the most effective emotes were the really subtle ones - head tilts, gaze aversions, that sort of thing.

Sometimes scenes that we had conversation emotes for were changed to isometric-only because it felt better for the kind of gameplay that was happening at the time (abandoning ship and Kurt vs Hammond are the ones I can think of off the top of my head)!

Katie (the character artist!) and I ended up going back and editing emotes, or making new ones to fit scenes better once we had them for testing. Most of the emotes that were done post-script were Hunt in the Captain's interviews, and the important conversations with your crew towards the end of the game, in their degraded costumes. We gave a lot of extra special care and attention to Cordell in the dog scene, and to Nutlee's scene in tent-city as well.

I DO have to say though, I don't personally consider the work that wasn't used to have been a waste. When I designed the characters, I did early pose concepts that were really useful for developing the individual characterisations of everyone in the cast. This bank of work was also really useful for helping Katie get used to the style when they joined, so all's well that ends well!

Next time around we'll have more writing done before we dive into emotes though haha. Hopefully we'll be a lil more efficient!

Going to continue with some endgame spoiler stuff under the cut!

To use Hunt as an example, when we first imagined the player meeting him again at the end of the game, he was going to be almost comedically mad, kind of Machiavellian almost.

But when I read the scene in preparation for emoting it, it was totally different. We had always planned to have the fruit mechanic, but now that I had to sit with the context of Hunt having experienced the loss of his crew over and over again, it became much more somber, you're finally taking a peek under the deceptive, jolly mask he had at the start of the game.

This is also the scene where he makes his final judge of your character, and could have to relent to you being a much better person and captain than he, or he might decide he hates you and your rotten soul. It called for a subtler approach. It was one of the last scenes I drew for the game, and I listened to the music over and over as I worked on it.

I think this is a lot better, and I'm glad we changed it.

#the pale beyond #the pale beyond spoilers #the pale beyond concept art #concept art #game dev art #asks #answers #?

18 notes · View notes

thebroccolination · 1 year

Note

I'm curious about something! In your opinion, which Between Us Specials are BounPrem and which are WinTeam? You mentioned on your last post staff and SWS were very mich aware of the mix, so 🤔🤔 Curious Stephh 🤭

Oooooohohoho, this is a fun ask!

THE BETWEEN US SPECIALS BOUNPREM vs. WINTEAM

Week 1

90% WinTeam

I'd call this one pretty solidly in character. Team moves around in his sleep a lot, Win grumbles a bit, gives Team a kiss on the cheek before he gets out of bed, and Team has an emotional meltdown because he was awake. I think Prem's just a tiiiny bit giddier than Team would be.

70% WinTeam

I think they both borrowed a little too much from their own personalities for this one, Boun more than Prem. Like, Boun's smile and laugh when he realizes Team wants a kiss goodbye are very much his own.

100% WinTeam

And thus, my overall favorite! Win pretends to be exasperated for three seconds, Team is a coddled baby, and Win is smitten. I'm pretty sure these are supposed to be set in the future, like Win's fourth year and Team's second, so this matches up perfectly with how they'd be down the road.

Week 2

30% WinTeam

This is very, very BounPrem to me. Boun just seems to be having fun with the goofy setup, and Prem's reaction at the end is a little too cartoonish. (Also, If I'm remembering right, the original skit Sheep wrote had them eating actual ice cream, so it melted faster and the tone was a little more ~erotic~. The popsicle they got for this scene wasn't really melting, though, so I think it made the scene a lot goofier than it was supposed to be.)

20% WinTeam

This one really drives home a comment Boun made about these special episodes: he found laughing as Win especially challenging because Win didn't really laugh in UWMA. He was fairly collected and calm for most of his scenes, so these lighthearted episodes where he laughs quite a bit are when Boun shines through most obviously. Like, this is just Boun being silly with Prem.

20% WinTeam

Again, this is mostly BounPrem goofing off and being cute. I remember Thai fans were very, "lol so this is a BounPrem week," when these three aired. It was cute, it just wasn't WinTeam Cute.

Week 3

0% WinTeam, 0% BounPrem

This was based on a short social media skit Sheep wrote in 2020. If I'm remembering correctly, Team pokes at his stomach and whines because the pool is closed during lockdown, so Win basically suggests sex as exercise instead. So it's another skit that was originally hinting at an erotic ending aaand turned goofy in the special episode. I honestly pretend this one doesn't exist. I didn't like the weight-shaming in UWMA and I liked it even less in the special episodes. But to give credit where it's due, when fans reached out to Paaty and Dao (BP's managers) about, they said they'd talked to New about it and he said they'd discuss the issue in more detail. So far, there hasn't been anything like it in BU, so it seems like they took the criticism seriously. (And considering one of their favorite sponsors is a plastic surgery clinic that specializes in weight loss, I'm impressed. Fingers crossed it lasts for the rest of BU.) Anyway, Win wouldn't weight-shame his boyfriend. NOT MY WINTEAM.

Note: Weight's a common topic in Asia, I know. When I lived in Japan, it was fairly common to get a cheerful, "You're skinnier/you got fat!" as a greeting from people I hadn't seen in a while. Still, it's one of those cultural things I don't think should be excused just because it's cultural. It just think it's universally unnecessary to comment on other people's bodies, y'know? You don't know what they're going through, it's not yours to comment on, etc. Plus I really don't like the position it puts Prem in.

5% WinTeam

Pffft. I'm remembering how much I disliked Week 3. This week was the one that really worried me about Between Us and how they'd portray Team. Like, why would he be this averse to sex in the special episodes, which are meant to be set when they've been dating for a while…? It just gave me those old-school BL vibes where the ~bottom~ is all "nooOoOOOoOoo I'm pure and I don't like sex" and I want to stab myself in the eye.

30% WinTeam

I think Boun channels the exasperation Win would feel, but Prem plays Team slightly too much like a caricature of Team for me. And then the whole second half is just playful Boun being playful Boun. And again, the "NOOOO NOT SEEEEX" thing.

Note: The locker room scene in BU damn near made me cry. I had almost no hope of them showing Team that enthusiastic about sex after the special episodes.

Week 4

90% WinTeam

Team's asleep throughout the scene, so this was all up to Boun, and he did well, I think! He's a little softer on the ABC gang than I think Win would be, but otherwise I think it's solid. Also, Team reaching for Win in his sleep is my second-favorite moment in these.

Note: N'aw, first introduction of the alphabet! (Minus Art, who was cast later as A.)

90% WinTeam

I was enormously relieved when this one aired because it actually had Team initiating sex. Yay! And the music is ridiculous, but I also really liked Prem's initial frustration/anxiety. He plays it a little too over the top, but in general this is probably my third-favorite scene.

Week 5

0% WinTeam

This is 100% BounPrem. The feet-kicking from Boun, the teasing from Prem, etc. This is WinTeam cosplaying BounPrem.

50% WinTeam

This is very cute, absolutely, but I don't see Win being this taken aback by a cheek kiss after they've been dating for months or possibly a year. Prem did fine though! This feels very much like Team.

60% WinTeam

Especially when you compare this to the horror movie scene in the main series, it's very, very clear that Boun's reaction here is zero percent Win and all himself. BUT there he tells Team he'll stay until it ends felt like Win. I can't decide where I fall on Team telling Win he's cute: it feels like Prem, but it's got Team's sass, so I'll lean in Team's favor for this one.

Week 6

50% WinTeam

This is EXTREMELY FUNNY but it's also EXTREMELY BOUNPREM. In fairness, I think Prem managed to stay mostly in character, but just look at that expression up there. That's 100% my gentle chaotic son Boun. <3

60% WinTeam

It's a little more in-character than the last one but it's still a little caricature-y.

BASICALLY, there's a reason why they put a "we're just fucking around, don't take this seriously" disclaimer at the start of every episode. I saw someone on here call the special episodes extended character workshops, which is genius and probably true.

Regardless of whether they'e more WinTeam or BounPrem, they're very cute and they kept us fed while we waited. <3

And it shows how much they've grown!

#kiranokira answers #between us special #between us #winteam

90 notes · View notes

saintadeline · 4 months

Note

Hey there. I've been doing a lot more lore diving lately and there's one question I have regarding Adella. Do you think she ever learns that the Hunter is not part of the Healing Church? When you meet her, you have to have church clothing to get her to trust you, but it never occurred to me until now that she might think you're a member through out the entire game. I think that assumption changes the context of her feelings towards you getting Arianna's blood, so I was curious of your feelings on it.

You know you're so right I never really thought about it extensively either so now's the time. A while ago I used to assume she'd just figure it out on her own but if you think about it theres actually nothing that could indicate so and if anything, all that happens kind of reinforces that idea anyway? She might see you walking around with another garb yeah but you have brought her to a chapel of all places, and the chapel dweller doesn't really know you either it's not like they'd say anything about you that could signify otherwise. That and she's not really talking to them anyway. I think in her mind authority and hunters are inherently linked to the church so even without definite proof or without you wearing church attire constantly she would've assumed so. She's a Yharnamite, she's not expecting any random person and Especially not an outsider to help her, the church is the face of bravery and kindness in adversity. I think the way I'd see it is that she immediately took you for a higher standing member of the church but figured out you were a church hunter, so still a church member and still "above her" but not as much as she seemed to think in that very first dialogue, which would explain why she never really brings up the church again. Mostly what's worth looking at here is this line: "Oh, brave hunter. You’re alive. Thank you very much. The town is in disarray, but there are still people here. Together, we await the help of the Healing Church. I cannot begin to express my gratitude to you. The only thing that I can offer… Is my own lowly blood. If it would suffice?" It's the only time she ever mentions the church and you at the same time again but it's easy to interprete in several different ways due to the way it's phrased so vaguely. I looked up the literal translation of the japanese text, "together" denotes specifically her and the other people waiting in the chapel and doesnt seem to include the hunter (you) in the "us". Thus it's possible to take the way she says "(we await the help of) the healing church" as encompassing you and being almost a direct question. But i think it's a subtility that's impossible to figure out for sure so that really depends how you want to take it. Unfortunately I'm running into an issue here which is the "you" in "my gratitude to you". I don't know enough about japanese to figure it out myself but I know for sure it is different from the way we have a separate and yet undistinguishable plural and singular You in this scenario. So not being able to look at the grammatical building of the original sentence I can't bring light on anything wrt how this sentence is supposed to be taken, singular and plural You in english are only differenciated with their context but here both would work and bring a different meaning to what we're researching, so I'm a bit stuck. If anyone knows more about it and would like to help me dissect "貴方には、感謝の言葉もありません" you're more than welcome to LOL. So this did not help a whole lot or bring many definite answers but I think it's more easily interpretable as her still viewing you as part of the church although not exactly all-powerful like her superiors are. But then again she's kind of the bottom of the ladder anyway so Anything would be "above" her.

Anyhow, yeah this absolutely ties into her aversion for Arianna, I wouldnt go as far as to say it Changes the context entirely, it just adds some that was, in my opinion, already in the same direction; I do think the church is a prejudiced organization but her distrust of Arianna was always more strongly about bloodline than sex work. Yharnam has such vitriol towards Cainhurst that I think it would be near impossible to have lineage from it and not have it be known by everyone, especially since Arianna just straight up uses a dress from ye olde Cainhurst. So not only is Adella wary of her, and jealous of the attention she has, and considers her existence blasphemy, she also directly sees a church member, higher up than her, interact with her and even partake of her blood which would be Extra forbidden. I think she's too far brainwashed to ever even think about the fact that people in the church might be corrupt, she's too busy looking up to people as saviors and the epitomy of good (as well as herself as lowly and insignificant in their wake) to consider that. So seeing what she would (wrongly) assume as exactly that will be a shock to her and something she just cannot understand no matter how much she thinks about it. And confusion and a lack of understanding make you much more likely to act irrationally especially when you're unknowingly being influenced by something greater than you.

#see adella is such an interesting character because theres SO many factors that make her act the way she does #very smart thank you so much for bringing it up to me #i'm like beyond honored that you thought about blood saint lore and came directly to me about it you have no idea #this is like ego boosting to me #ANYWAY YOU GET IT. YOU UNDERSTAND #bloodborne #btw im so sorry i JUST realized who you are IM SO EMBARRASSED #IM SO SORRY. BUT ALSO HI AGAIN #i dont think i ever knew what your tumblr was :crying emoji:#im so bad with this i keep forgetting to check the blogs of people who interact with me and this has happened multiple times

7 notes · View notes

beck-nightengale · 1 year

Text

Character Ask for Jade the Prophetess

So I'd been ticking away at that old Enderal Character Ask for some weeks and finally had time to finish it, and lordy was that a lot of questions with a lot of answers...

Have some lineart/expressions that my friend (please commission her, she's amazing) did for my girl if you're just passing by:

But yeah. This thing ended up being a lot of words - more words than what is probably necessary (I'm justifying it because she's a novel character that much of her backstory will be re-adapted to, anyway). Even with all of this, there are still a lot of side details left out, but... I figure my Ask Box is open if anyone is curious about any bits in particular.

Grab some tea if you're down for that.

Warning for spoilers (obviously), child/domestic abuse, cannibalism, eye scream, mental illness, addiction, and the usual Enderal fuckery that's on full steam ahead. (I guess this should be a given, but hey you never know.)

1. The basics – name, age, etc…

Her original name was Jehoel Gris. She started using “Jade” shortly after her family was killed because of, you know, Reasons. Distancing herself from her old life, for one. Second, it had come at the suggestion of an old Aeterna woman, who helped her to recover from the injuries she got after the Masked Men tried to burn her alive with her parents. This also prompted her to try to pass as human once she was on her own. Reinventing yourself can be pretty simple when you are already a nobody.

Age-wise, she is 32. Her birthdate is 14th of the Winter Star, 8202. So not very old, but old enough to have Gone Through Some Shit.

2. Describe their appearance.

Thanks to the Aeterna blood from her mother’s side, Jade is pretty dang tall, standing at 6’4” (195cm). Because of this, she slouches when she sits and generally carries herself in poor posture to make herself appear smaller than she actually is. Even then, her attempts are not always successful around those who can recognize the more subtle hints of her Aeterna features or catch a peek of her ears in her hair, but those traits are pretty subdued for the most part. She tries to pass as half-Qyranian/half-Nehrimese, which she might actually be a quarter of both. We just don’t know. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also she has freckles on her face, which aren’t always visible on her darker skin (it’s no mystery why her father didn’t believe that she was his child, really). Got some dark as fuck rings under her eyes from chronic insomnia. Her left eye is blind and pearl white in color, with some visible central heterochromia in her right, in which the outer iris is a storm-grey turning light brown/hazel towards the pupil.

3. How do they like to dress?

Generally prefers comfort over style, though she isn’t averse to dresses when wanting to look her Sundas’ best, which is rare. Purple is her favorite color, but she has very few opportunities to actually wear it. Her wardrobe varies a bit depending on the occasion. If she’s ever feeling particularly pretty, she’ll wear some flowers in her hair.

For the most part, she avoids outfits revealing too much skin, especially her hands, arms, and back, and she always wears gloves during her day-to-day activities. Not because she is modest, though...

4. Do they have any markings (scars, tattoos, birthmarks)?

The reason she covers her body with long sleeves and gloves would be the fact that it’s covered in scars. She’s not particularly self-conscious about her body, as she’s been intimate plenty of times without much trouble before. But she does feel that they make most people see her in a certain way (particularly pity or concern) that she would rather deflect more often than not. It’s also kind of hard to spin entertaining yarns about your childhood abuse or the time you barely managed to escape being burned alive by a cult, so she’s more likely to make up lies about where they come from than tell the truth.

Other scars just happen to be products of past scuffles and misadventures during her time as a street urchin and slave. Most notable are the severe burns left on her back, left shoulder, and behind her right leg.

Her face is not so easily covered up, and neither is Jade inclined to. After all, it’s an otherwise pretty face. She doesn’t care for helmets or masks to hinder her vision in the one good eye she has. The scar and blindness came from a particularly brutal incident, back when her father was first trying to teach her to hunt so she could be of more help on the farm. When she failed to hit a rabbit at a distance, he lashed out several times with the lower limb of a hunting bow. After a point, the left side of her face was swollen, and the eye came near to popping out entirely. Though it was salvaged with a combination of her mother’s healing salves and magic (which reduced what would have been severe disfigurements for the rest of her life), the eye remained permanently discolored. This event also may have left Jade comatose with some brain damage, had it not been for her mother’s healing, but it was also a turning point for how much abuse she could take, mentally and emotionally (and elaborated more on in later questions).

The remaining facial scars she has left are from the stitches where the skin had been split open from her father’s other… episodes. Her mother did what she could to heal Jade’s most grievous injuries, which led to her falling so sick with Arcane Fever so frequently that, on many days, she couldn’t even get out of bed. Jade didn’t fully understand the extent of Arcane Fever at the time, however, and just equated the memory with Light magic = bad.

5. What are they like? Describe their personality (use whatever tools you like- MBTI, D&D alignment, astrological signs, Hogwarts house, words/phrases):

Pre-Enderal, she’d probably be chaotic neutral; she did a lot of bad shit, but mostly out of survival. Post-Enderal and lots of character development later, she’s become more chaotic good, where she’s trying to be a better person than she was (or at least present herself as such) while still giving zero fucks about the law.

Moreover, Jade is the epitome of the type who masks their depression and deep loathing towards herself in humor and sarcasm, which seeps through self-deprecating jokes. And you can damn well bet that she hated when the Father called her out on this when she was working with Tharaêl, too. She wears all kinds of proverbial masks in hopes that no one can see the madwoman she fears she truly is.

See, ever since she was a child, she always had a peculiar connection with death, especially after the incident where she lost sight in her left eye… or so one can presume. Whether she truly heard the whispers of the dead or if it was the product of a shattered psyche, it’s hard to say. She kept the frequent visits of voices and phantasms to herself after her mother expressed fear that the girl’s mind just broke as a result of her father’s torment, or that she had suffered irreparable damage from her head injury. Most of the time, the voices she heard would go away on their own if she ignored them long enough, anyway. Since then, she always believed that people would think her mad if they got too close to her, started noticing the little ticks that always make her seem “off” – an ill-timed laugh, a hollow smile, talking when there’s seemingly no one else around. It was very wild how easily folks believed her when she started having her premonitions and experience with the dead after arriving on Enderal.

As an urchin child, she learned how to survive on the streets via thievery and fraud, until she was eventually caught and sold into slavery. The noblewoman who purchased her had taken an interest in her potential in burglary and violence, as she had a knack for both. Jade had no qualms when it came to killing in self-defense, which hardened her when it came to death in general (even though she may or may not have been haunted by those she killed for a time). This skill, coupled with her unassuming appearance and youth, made her an oddly effective hatchet person. If she wasn’t subjected to hard labor (which consumed the majority of her years as a slave), every now and then she was tasked to neutralize “threats” her master suspected of “plotting against her” – she was very paranoid, and a bit of a madwoman in her own right. As she grew into her adolescence, Jade just started seeing the killing as tiresome as any other chore she did, one in which she took neither joy nor despair, provided that she could shut the ghosts out.

6. How would they describe themselves?

“Hi, I’m garbage.”

7. Education level?

Smarter than one would think from a former farm girl, slave, street urchin, and possible madwoman – a fact which she uses to her own advantage, sometimes using reverse psychology-esque tactics by pretending to be dumber than she actually is. Not many would suspect a smooth talker out of her with the way she curses, but she’s maxed out in Rhetoric for a reason. Between her rather crass manner of speech, she can be remarkably well-spoken and thoughtful when it comes to matters she’s passionate about.

During her years as a slave, she was surprisingly given a basic education in reading and writing, which opened up a lot of avenues for Jade as she got older and would sneak some books to read during her rare downtimes. This is also just an excuse for how she’s able to speed read through all those skill books. Like, goddamn.

8. What are they proud of in themselves? What are they embarrassed about?

Jade would be hard-pressed to claim she takes any pride in the things she does, but she has developed the “fake it ‘til you make it” attitude to an art. Think you might be losing your mind? Pretend you’re sane until it goes away or no one notices. :)

Also she has shamefully high confidence in her seduction skills – she knows she’s got a pretty face (blemishes and all) and she uses those assets in her favor. It was especially useful when she was in the market of scamming and thieving, as it was possible to get away with all the gay crimes by flashing that charm and wit.

Of course, her seduction doesn’t always land. Her response to rejection is less than graceful.

9. Do they know any languages other than Inâl?

Some phrases from the Aeterna, Qyranians, and Kiléans she’s met, but not really fluent in anything. Linguistics isn’t her strong suit.

10. What, if any, aspects of their mother’s culture influenced them growing up?

Not much, since Jade was pretty ignorant of Aeterna culture and beliefs. Her mother always seemed to try to put that part of her past behind her when she had arrived on Nehrim as a refugee. Esme was shocked by how little Jade knew about her own kind.

11. Name a song (or a few) that remind you of them.

Oof, it’s hard to name a few, but I’ve got a whole playlist of songs for my Prophetess. Girl With One Eye by Florence & the Machine has always been my anthem for Jade as a character (she’s based off of a protagonist from one of my old novels/D&D character I played ages ago – more on that here if you’re curious), but it is hard to choose between that and Hated by Life Itself, Again, Arsonist’s Lullabye, and Little Talks as her one song.

Her OG!book iteration also had her own official songs (and In My Mind is still pretty fitting for her when you get down to those lyrics, goddamn), so… there’s that, too (and yes, I find the title of her theme to be hilariously and unintentionally appropriate, considering the “canon” ending I go for her Enderal version).

12. Speaking of songs, can they sing? What is their voice like? How about instruments?

Well, she’s no minstrel, but she doesn’t mind humming a tune or singing a tavern song she learned while on the road. She doesn’t have an ear for drums or flutes, but she enjoys strumming on a lute if she gets her hands on one (which may or may not be a residual character trait from her modern iteration, who was a violinist).

She likes to dance as well, despite the fact that she constantly derides herself for it by claiming she has “two left feet” and is overall a terrible dancer. She kind of is, but she likes it anyway.

...I also just really like dancing mods. They give me life.

13. What was their life like before coming to Enderal?

As indicated in previous answers, she was in a very bad way. A fugitive, runaway slave who had attempted to kill her master after reaching a breaking point, and ended up with a bounty on her head that prevented her from living in one place for too long. She did at some point have a few relationships (the longest one lasting three years), but her issues with trust, commitment, and fear of her own sanity rarely ever kept her around the same people. Her first experience with love didn’t end very well, and she’s had not much more than a series of shallow flings ever since.

I do have a timeline of “life events” that I mapped out that I’m still picking at off and on (and will also be adapted to a new novel series), but an abridged version of her life before Enderal can be described as: A walking natural fucking disaster. She had a bad habit of losing herself in drogae and casual sex as a way of coping with the night terrors in her sleep and her questionable mental state when she was awake. Had it not been for Sirius, she would have sniffed dust into an early grave.

14. How did they decide to leave Nehrim?

She didn’t. Her plan was pretty much to die alone in a gutter somewhere in her war-torn homeland. The only reason she left was because Sirius wanted her to come with him to start a new life.

15. Describe their relationship with Sirius.

Tense at first. They met as slaves, and then ran into each other again as runaways, where they were nearly recaptured by slavers. Their captors wanted to cash in on Jade’s bounty, and as such she was more heavily guarded than Sirius – a situation which the two readily took advantage of.

After that, they ended up sticking together. Sirius thought that she needed a friend, even after all of her efforts to try and keep him at arm’s length, and Jade figured it couldn’t hurt to have someone watch her back sometimes. For whatever reason she couldn’t understand, he never gave up on her; he often tried to make her see herself as someone capable of a lot of good, rather than a total lost cause. It just made his death hit that much harder, as she felt personally responsible (elaborated on more in #36).

Initially, she only told him a little about her past out of necessity, due to him frequently waking her up screaming in her sleep. But as they grew closer and developed a genuine friendship, she began to open up to him more in earnest. They were a dynamic hobo duo for eight years, which is the longest Jade ever stuck by someone, so they went through a lot together during their time on the streets.

16. Who do they blame for what happened to their family?

Herself. It was she who sought help when her father’s abuse had escalated to him finally attempting to drown her in the pond outside their home. She only survived because her mother had finally intervened, only to collapse from her Fever. Jade ran off on her own to get help and found some members from the Creator’s Temple, which only led to them condemning the entire family instead. Her sister died when the Masked Men set fire to their house, while Jade was strung up alongside her mother and father. She escaped with her life, but sustained severe burns in the process that left permanent scars.

The reason as to why the Masked Men executed the family is unclear in the game. For Jade’s story, it was because her father’s downward spiral into insanity led to cannibalism during a particularly poor harvest season, in which food was scarce. He murdered a local half-Qyranian man who he always suspected of being the biological father of his daughters, then forced the family to unknowingly consume him. The Creator’s Temple caught wind when more travelers were disappearing near the farm, confirmed it when they investigated the house, and saw the entire family as “tainted”. Thus, no one was to be spared.

At the end of the day, Jade believes that if she never sought help and somehow had just done things on her own, then her mother and sister would still be alive. Since then, she’s struggled to ask for help and would try to do things on her own that she really shouldn’t.

17. Apart from stowing away, have they ever broken the law?

Oh, she was a literal criminal long before being a stowaway. Even if you don’t count the fact that she’s a runaway slave, she’s wanted for the attempted murder of her master, who was starting to get cozy with some members of the Creator’s Temple. That triggered Jade’s aforementioned breaking point. For about eleven years, she’s been a wanted woman, evading bounty hunters and the law alike.

Asides from that, she’s committed several kinds of theft and fraud in order to get by, as her situation in Nehrim made it very difficult to make an honest living. She didn’t mind stealing food from racists who wouldn’t sell to an Aeterna wench, too.

18. How honest are they? Under what circumstances would they lie?

Funny thing about that. Jade is a natural-born liar, and can easily spin yarns to sidestep the truth. This is likely to come up if ever questioned about her scars, where she’d be quicker to claim she got them by wrestling a bear (which is absolutely not true) than she is to share her life story of child abuse and otherwise unsavory life events.

That isn’t to say she’s incapable of telling the truth. Far from it – Jade speaks her mind on many occasions. Certain times she’d make use of that silver tongue of hers would be if the life of someone she cared about was on the line, or if she kept her mouth shut because she genuinely gave a damn about hurting someone’s feelings. Though she has a long history of self-sabotage, she’s got some people that she’d really like to keep in her life right now.

19. Worst memory(s)? Best memory(s)?

Her worst memory was the night her father tried to kill her. We’ve already covered that in 16, so moving on.

Her best memory was when she first took her sister out into the forest to explore some of the prettier sights of Ostian together, escaping the mess that was their home life. I imagine they had a very close bond and Jade was very protective of her, and wanted them both to have moments where they could just be kids together. They made promises to leave the farm and explore the world together. Obviously did not happen.

20. Fight, or flight?

Flight. More often than not, her first choice is to run from her problems than to confront them.

21. Describe their combat style.

Pre-Enderal, dual-wielding daggers or old-fashioned fisticuffs were always her weapon of choice. And she was not against fighting dirty, such as throwing sand in the eyes of her targets, hitting them in their weak points, or kicking someone while they’re down. She was never a heavy-hitter, and preferred discretion to get the upper hand. If all else failed, she’d just book it and run.

Since her magic awakened, she’s taken to Elementalism as her main weapon, namely shock and frost-based spells (her pyrophobia prevents her from dabbling in anything fire-based). She uses daggers – now enchanted – as backup when her mana is low.

Eventually, she delved pretty deep into Phasmalism. Now she prefers to enlist the help of her ghost pals to deal with the close-quarter battles while she keeps a distance with magic.

22. Have they ever killed before? What is their reaction to combat?

Absolutely. The High Ones didn’t call her a murderer because they were being metaphorical. Her first kill was in self-defense when she was a young urchin child, and killing just got easier and easier the more it was asked and expected of her. For the entire decade she had spent as a slave, she had very little qualms about the occasional murder. Her only boundary was that she never, ever hurt children, and she held those who ever did in contempt. It would be impossible for her not to think of her little sister and live with the consequences.

Of course, all the death opened a whole barrel full of trauma for her. Back then, she was frequently “haunted” by those she killed, and it would take some time for her to elude her own phantasms, or at least make living with them more bearable so that she didn’t have to see or hear them screaming all the time. But since arriving on Enderal, the chaos that were once her thoughts have become eerily quieter. Well, save for the visions she now has. Those are new.

23. How do they react to having magical abilities? Do they use them?

After her magical talent blossomed, Jade went hard for Elementalism (save for fire magic), but she dabbled in spells from some of the other classes as well.

The only school she actively refused to entertain is Light Magic. Too much negative association around it after watching her mother’s health deteriorate to Arcane Fever, due to how much healing was necessary in her childhood. Watching the health of someone she loved rapidly decline like that just had a way of wrecking her with guilt.

Since taking to Phasmalism like a fish to water, Jade tends to employ the help of the dead to make up for her particularly lackluster skills in combat. Yera Shadowsong was her first ghost, who she was quite delighted to meet and keep her company on her travels. Others she enlisted were Kilana Hammerblow, Denna Frostheart, as well as the Starling Navigator and Aeterna Ambassador. Having actually known and witnessed the tragic death of Zar’ah firsthand, Jade ended up relying on her the most in future battles, as well as accompanying alongside her on the road when she had no one else to talk to.

Even if the echoes don’t seem fully cognizant of their existence, it nevertheless became Jade’s mission to try and extend them some degree of freedom and compassion. Whether they understand her or not, she finds herself interacting with them as though they were fully realized, living people, in an effort to try and draw out some sliver of their former selves. It’s a work in progress. Somehow it also makes her feel a little more sane just having sounding boards she can vent to when no one else is around.

24. What do they think of Enderal?

Hated it with the passion of a thousand dying suns. As someone who abhors religion, she had to bite back her heretical opinions whenever anyone spoke of the Paths or the Lightborn. After passing the umpteenth corpse hanging from a tree, and imagining that it would only be a matter of time before one of those corpses would become her own, she started trying to find a way to leave the country altogether.

After a point, she did develop a fondness for the land and some of its people, especially after the Nehrimese invasion led to raids and murdering civilians, which reminded her all too well as to why she left her homeland. She may have conflicting feelings about the country, but the common people sure as hell didn’t deserve that.

25. Did they do the Biggest Egg Hunt Ever quest?

Yup. She didn’t care much for the Starling prophecies, but Kurmai asked nicely. It also helped that he paid her and she needed money.

26. How do they feel about joining the Order? What do they think of Arantheal?

Oh, she hates the Order and everything they stand for. Her first instinct upon meeting Arantheal and learning about the Cycle was to get as far away as possible. This brought her to seek employment with the Golden Sickle so she could afford a ship out of the country and, later on, attempting to convince Dijaam to let Jade join her back to Kilé. It was only when those plans fell through, and her witnessing what the Red Madness had done to Mendelus and other civilians firsthand, did Jade return and ruefully accept Arantheal’s offer.

On that note, it did make certain parts of his speech during her and Calia’s inductions as Keepers extremely awkward by making it sound like she sought the Order out of a sense of purpose and duty – she really didn’t. Hell, she even initially told Firespark that she had no interest whatsoever in what the Order was doing. Overall, she finds Arantheal to be insufferable and too self-important for her liking. She never fully trusted him or agreed with his leadership. To her, he didn’t extend aid to the common folk as nearly as much as he should have, including his refusal to make the death of the Lightborn public knowledge to his people.

27. What is their opinion of the gods (or lack thereof)?

Though not one to preach her beliefs (mostly out of what bit of self-preservation she has, as many would deem her views as blasphemy), Jade has a very strong personal hatred for religion and would be, by all accounts, an atheist. As much of an atheist as one can be in a world where living gods have walked among mortals, that is. If you ask her, there is no afterlife, and there sure as hell ain’t no “Eternal Paths” waiting for her when she dies. When you die, you die. The gods have done nothing for her or her family, and her father even used the name of the “Creator” to justify abuse. And so she felt less than nothing when rumors of the gods’ deaths began to circulate, and she felt satisfaction and vindication upon those rumors being confirmed.

Of course, she knows better than to casually share her ideology in a theocratic country like Enderal, but appreciates engaging with other like-minded individuals, such as those who participated in killing the gods like the Nehrimese mages. While she can get along with religious people well enough, she prefers that they just keep their piety to themselves or at least not try to convert her. It won’t work.

Interestingly, she was surprised by how tolerant and understanding Calia was when it came to her views on religion, as she didn’t once try to argue or invalidate Jade’s experiences. This made her appreciate the other woman that much more and start to develop a closer relationship early on.

28. Wine, or pipe?

Pipe. Always pipe. Since discovering Peaceweed, she’s found that the stuff happens to help her sleep and calm her thoughts, so she smokes pretty much regularly now.

29. Do they spare or arrest Hallys, the farmer-turned-bandit in the quest, Deus Ex Machina? Why?

Against her better judgment, she actually agreed with Calia to have Hallys arrested, namely because she learned that he was initially lying about where he got the money from and that he actually stole it from the Undercity’s food bank, which pissed her right the hell off. While she felt for his situation, it didn’t justify screwing over the poor, who were much worse off than he and his family.

Though finding out that he had been executed at the gallows so soon after made her regret that decision. To her, that wasn’t justice, and it sure as hell didn’t endear her to trust Ark’s Tribunal to handle similar situations afterward.

30. What are their feelings and opinions about the Undercity?

It feels a little too close to home for her, as she often lived in similar piss-poor conditions when she was homeless. Like it shouldn’t exist, but it does, and she understands why and how all too well. From time to time, she’ll hand out coin and food to the children running errands or just looking like they need some help.

31. How do they react to the beggars of Ark?

When she has the coin to spare, she’ll sometimes offer some pennies. And she’ll always pay a kid delivering a message whether they ask for it or not. It wasn’t too long ago that she was in the same boat, and appreciated what little a passing Samaritan could provide. She got that Gift of Charity perk.

32. Where and how do they spend their time when in Ark?

Early on she started visiting the Undercity because she likes mischievous things it felt more familiar to her. Plus she found a small little hiding place tucked away for when she feels the need to abscond from “civilized” society. While down there, she frequented the Dust Pit to watch the fights, not really phased by the brute violence.

On the surface, she spends much of her time in taverns when she has coin to spare or feels like hanging out with Jespar. She also spends time with Calia in the bathing house or hanging out in the courtyard of the Sun Temple in between missions, since Jade became was quickly taken by Calia and wanted to help her open up more, all whilst getting to know the other woman better.

33. What would they do with three wishes?

I did the wishing well quest after finishing Angel and All the Dead Souls, so I imagine the first wish was for Calia not to leave her, the second was for Jespar not to hate her for the shitty things she said back at him. The third was for a sweet new dagger. Guess all three technically came true.

34. How do they feel about death? Do they fear it?

Death is a natural cycle of life. For the last handful of years, she was fully ready to die, anyway, and believed that there was no great afterlife or paradise that would follow. In more recent times, she’s become quite fond of being alive, though she wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice her life to save the ones she cares about.

35. What (else) do they fear?

As mentioned earlier, she has a profound fear of fire, and actively avoids using flame-based magic despite being very proficient in Elementalism. At most, she’ll use fire-enchanted daggers.

Additionally, she has developed thalassophobia to a degree since being shipwrecked, feeling anxious around large bodies of deep water, and a dislike for swimming. I kinda headcanon that she never even met Nessah/Sister Pride when working with the Rhalâta, let alone took her heart, because it required her to dive underwater for a long period of time, so she had no qualms with bringing a different heart to the First Seer instead (not that Jade would’ve killed her. She found Nessah’s notes, and she wasn’t about to execute a woman clearly suffering from mental illness for a group she didn’t care about). You can also bet that she noped right out of the Brotherhood of the Kor questline as soon as it required a “breathe underwater” spell to delve into a submerged temple. So yeah, she just told Mirella, “Sorry, lady, your son is dead” because it was the most likely truth, anyway. ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Above all else, however, her greatest fear is insanity – a fear that the High Ones exploit the hell out of by constantly making her question her perception of reality and whether or not this all is just a fever dream of her dying consciousness. It helps very little that she already had a predisposition for madness, never knowing if her “connection with the dead” was real or a byproduct of her trauma. Remembering how her father descended into madness and cannibalism has a way of making her doubt her own sanity.

36. Do they have any secrets?

Quite a few doozies, actually. Prior to coming to Enderal, Jade had an addiction to dangerous drogae. And it was because of this addiction that she ended up in the situation she is in now, a fact that she is all too ashamed to admit to anyone. Even worse, she blames herself for what happened to Sirius because of this fatal flaw. Not only did she have proclivities for blowing whatever scraps of coin she earned to feed her addiction and other bad habits, which could have gone to paying for a ship out of Nehrim, the only reason Sirius chose to stow away with her, rather than sign on to the crew like a right proper lad, was to keep an eye on Jade while she went through the motions of withdrawals. He also stowed away with her to make sure that she didn’t get caught screaming in pain or waking from night terrors.

Similarly, signing onto Rocio’s crew wasn’t an option for Jade in the first place, due to being a runaway slave with a bounty on her head for the attempted murder of her former master. Despite trying to push him into leaving without her, Sirius refused. And now he’s dead. It’s impossible not to feel responsible for that, and for robbing her friend of the second chance at life that he so badly wanted.

Since becoming an Emissary, she’s found that her addiction has been miraculously “cured”, though she still gets uncomfortable around heavy drogae such as Glimmerdust. This resulted in her snapping back at Jespar in the Silver Cloud when she caught him using the stuff. Despite knowing what he was going through, Jespar wasn’t the only one who said very regrettable things that evening.

In addition to substance abuse, she also keeps her history of mental illness to herself, ashamed of what others would think if they knew she might be mad. Much of her prior ticks and instabilities ended up troubling her less and less once she became her “idealized self” on the shores of Enderal, anyway – the voices are dulled, and her mind feels a little more at peace these days.

While part of her felt that she should be grateful not to have to wrestle with her addiction or madness every day, the implications of a sudden recovery after losing her only friend scares her more than anything. For now, she has never shared this secret with anyone, not even her new companions.

37. How is their behavior around people they like? People they dislike?

Jade is very blunt and open about her feelings and has been noted to say whatever’s on her mind by more than one person. This can be for good or for ill depending on who she’s with – if she likes someone, she has no qualms blurting out the things she likes or finds attractive and appealing about them, or telling them what she feels they need to hear. If she doesn’t like them, then she’ll still speak her mind regardless of whether or not it hurts their feelings. She may even come off as abrasive or just downright rude. If her dislike runs deep enough, she won’t want to be in that person’s presence at all.

38. What is their relationship with the companions? Who, if anyone, did your prophet romance?

There were a few she became close to – some more than others.

Jespar: They got along pretty quick, since they shared very similar views on life, the Lightborn, and relationships. Jade has had Romance Gone Wrong in the past and didn’t quite want to see Jespar that way at first, either. It may or may not have helped that she made quite a few passing comments and propositions with him that amused him a bit. I headcanon that they had some FWB-type flings and then just never talked about it again, because Jade has her own hangups on relationships and monogamy. There were some feelings there on both sides, but were never realized until it was too late. (Side note: She decided to give him her own affectionate nicknames, such as “My Lord” because he kept calling her “Fair Lady”, and “Snowberry” because of his hair and he’s a goddamn fruity boy.)

Calia: Conversely, Jade just couldn’t resist and caught the feelings here. She tried to push them down until they died, but she grew more and more fond of her friend as time went by. It helped brighten some of Jade’s more cynical views of the world knowing that people like Calia existed, and wanted to change it for the better. In a sense, the two complimented each other in helping the other learn to enjoy life the way neither of the women allowed themselves to. In the end, she romances Calia, but I like to think they had more in-depth discussions on relationships and where Jade stands with them before they made things official. Due to her own struggles with her sanity and being constantly at war with what darkness lives in her own mind, she related with Calia on a very personal level, which became the foundation for their relationship to grow during and after the game’s main storyline.

Dijaam: Immediate crush, oh no. Jade worked with the Golden Sickle prior to accepting Arantheal’s deal, and maybe in no small part due to her weakness for Kiléans, Jade ended up being very smitten with Dijaam (while also quickly becoming very resentful towards her current employer’s “Path abidingness”, misogyny, and racism). She admired Dijaam’s determination and drive, and even suggested that they leave Enderal together. Too bad the Kiléan pulled the “wham, bam, thank you ma’am” at the end of the day. Oh well. Not the first time that’s happened to Jade. (Dijaam is probably still alive somewhere out there.)

Esme: Like a younger sister. In fact, Jade suspected her sister would’ve been around the same age, and turned out much like Esme if she were still alive. When she first met the fellow Aeterna woman having a hard time at the Frostcliff Tavern, Jade was immediately inclined to lend a hand. The two became closer throughout their search for her former companion, and though Jade feared the worst after a while, she didn’t want Esme to lose hope that she would see Tara alive and well. When the truth came to light, Jade did her best to comfort Esme. Before they parted ways, Esme gifted Jade a family heirloom – an amulet, which she continues to wear thereafter. (I also like to think that Esme was able to find a ship to leave Enderal before the end and is still alive.)

Tharaêl: One of her deepest regrets. To say that their relationship was turbulent would be an understatement. Much as Jade was on board with his cause to kill the Father for experimenting on and murdering innocent children, she grew equally frustrated with Tharaêl’s hypocrisy and uncompromising demeanor. Witnessing his regression to his childhood trauma was also not much unlike episodes she once struggled with, which made her try to empathize with him more. Killing Zar’ah was the straw that broke the camel’s back for her, however, as she did not believe that the mercenary deserved to die and that Tharaêl’s justification for it was bullshit. Still, she resolved to help him kill the Father, who was much worse in her eyes. But, when at that cliff’s edge, she could not bring herself to tell him the right words that could have saved his life. It is a moment that still haunts her long after his death, as she realized some time later that they were not much different. Her silence was his death knell.

39. Was there any non-companion character that they were close to? That they particularly disliked?

There was a quick connection when it came to Merrâyil and the Nehrimese mages, the former due to their shared history as slaves and experiences being Aeterna in a country like Nehrim, and the latter for their shared disdain towards religion and feelings about their homeland. When visiting the Sun Temple, she spent quite a bit of time with the group, particularly pestering Firespark and hanging out with Lishari. She was also deeply affected by Rynéus, as she saw much of her little sister in the boy and wanted so badly to save him. Failing him was like failing her sister all over again.

As for dislikes, she couldn’t stand Maél Dal’Loran, even if she found some of his deeds, such as providing support to the Undercity’s Pest House, to be noble. To Jade, Maél as a person was judgmental, racist, and plain impossible to work for. She ended up resigning from the Golden Sickle after gathering the ingredients he had requested. It doesn’t help that Jade’s first love was a Kiléan woman (not Dijaam), so she was not endeared by his anti-Kiléan sentiments.

40. How do they feel about myrads?

Though flying one for the first time freaked her out, she was immediately enamored with them. They’re majestic, adorable, and worthy of adoration and respect.

41. What dreams or ambitions did they have before coming to Enderal? What about afterwards?

Literally none. Her “dreams” were to crawl into a hole and die somewhere alone, until Sirius had convinced her to try and find a second chance for herself in Enderal.

Afterwards, she decided to just play it by ear. Her wanderlust developed the more she learned about other countries, and she decided she wanted to travel the world someday. Maybe use her newfound Arcanist abilities for good by saving lost souls with her Phasmalism, and figure out a way to rehabilitate the echoes into regaining their sense of self, rather than merely being slaves to the Phasmalist.

42. Do they like cities? Or do they prefer the country? Is there a region of Enderal that they like or dislike more than the others?

Despite always struggling with the noise and chaos of cities before, Jade had to adapt to them at an early age in order to get by. After a point, it just became a necessity, as cities were the easiest places to find places to make money.

She did learn to appreciate them more, to an extent, finding herself people-watching when seeking potential jobs (or marks). But if she could so choose, she would much prefer to live in the countryside.

43. What do they do to lower their considerable stress?

Staring at the underside of a desk until she feels better after a mental breakdown. :)

For real, though, some coping mechanisms are less healthier than others. Some times she’ll blow off steam by practicing her magic, or venting to one of her Phasmalist ghosts (especially Deanna, Kilana, and Zar’ah). Others she’ll get blackout drunk and end up in strange places (or strangers’ beds) she doesn’t remember going. Casual sex sometimes helps, too. Sometimes.

More recently she’s taken to smoking Peaceweed on the regular, which she finds calms her down a good deal. This method is marginally better.

44. Describe their perfect day off.

Dragging Calia out to more social situations, such as playing cards together with Jespar at the tavern (while Jade resists the urge to use her sleight of hand to pull fast ones on the group). In general, she just wants to spend time with her favorite people together. Other than that: Enjoying scenic locations with companions, such as beautiful sunsets, aurora borealis, and peaceful scenes off the beaten path. She absolutely loves Goldenforst. Anytime she can get a hot indoor bath, especially with Calia, is also a good time.

45. List three of their favorite things. Three things they hate?

Loves: Peaceweed, good brandy, animals (she really doesn’t have a particular favorite kind, but she does cry a little inside when a rabid wolf or fox forces her to kill it).

Hates: Cooking meat, swimming, and fire. For obvious reasons.

46. What’s in their pockets?

She gonna pop some tags,

Only got twenty pennies in her pocket–

...

Just a lot of junk, really. Don’t ask how many Endralean sugarbraids she has stuffed in there.

47. Pets? Mounts? Treasured possessions?

Two cats that are more like strays squatting at her house when she first bought it, but she doesn’t mind; she enjoys their company.

She also has a donkey she named Butterstuff and she loves him even if a big Aeterna woman does look kinda silly on a wee donkey.

For treasured possessions, she almost always wears the heirloom Esme gifted her. She might have a bit of a hoarding problem with useless junk, but that amulet is pretty and it means something to her, dammit.

48. How are their cooking skills?

Not good. Most of the stuff she makes is cheap and quick since she could never afford anything fancy before. She can make a decent enough vegetable stew and flatbread, but it doesn’t get more gourmet than that. Either she eats things raw/plain while on the go or she buys much yummier food while passing by vendors (love, love, love those date cakes).

49. Do you consider any particular quest or side quest to be definitive for your prophet? Which one(s) and why?

Other than the big faction ones like the Rhalâta and Golden Sickle: The Voice in the Water is an important quest for Jade, since it kind of explores her (possible) “experience” with the dead by just how natural it felt to be guided by a ghost that she knew wasn’t a product of her insanity. She felt particularly invested in helping to put the spirit of Pentas’ wife, Nira, to rest by seeing the ones who destroyed her life to justice. This quest opened Jade up to the possibility of being able to help people with her new gifts.

A Touching Effigy is also a good one, given that certain elements catered to some of Jade’s distaste for nobles and child killers. Ultimately she sided with Andrasta, because she can forgive killing useless nobles, but not Rhys for killing children in the name of his religion. Though she did (kind of) convince Andrasta to hold off on the murder for a while, mostly so she doesn’t get caught and worry her daughter. Never said Jade’s morals weren’t questionable.

50. How forgiving are they? For example, if they were yelled at in a brothel after searching high and low for this little sh*t, how would they react?

She can forgive well enough if the other party expresses genuine regret for their actions. For example, she easily forgives Jespar because she understood what he was going through, and she was just as much a little shit at the time (and was already tense being around Glimmerdust and a very high, very distressed Jespar). Really, she has a higher tolerance for friends who verbally lash out in the midst of their emotional turmoils, because she gets it – really. Jespar and Calia? Yeah, she got them. If it’s one thing that Sirius taught her, it’s that you don’t give up on friends, not even on their bad days.

There are few things that she just can’t and will never forgive. From her perspective, anyone who has ever hurt a child is the literal scum of the earth. Because of this, she was unable to think of the right words to save Tharaêl, just like how she failed to convince him to spare Qalian because she just couldn’t. And if she had done what Tharaêl had done, she knows that she wouldn’t have been able to live with herself, either. Maybe she could forgive Tharaêl someday, but she could never save him.

51. What do they think of the Veiled Woman?

Initially she really, really hated the Veiled Woman. Hated what she did to Sirius, hated what she did to Esme and Tara, and especially hated that oracular bullshit way of talking in the same vein as the Aged Man.

While she never could fully understand the Veiled Woman, Jade wondered if her motives for doing what she did was because she had some hope to end this particular Cycle. For that reason, and giving humanity a chance, Jade can’t bring herself to completely hate the Veiled Woman, either.

52. If they had been a victim of one of the black stones, how would it have affected them? What would they have used its power to accomplish?

Oh no, a black stone would likely amplify her pre-Enderal (possible) insanity. It would twist her sense of justice for the dead by turning her into a Phasmalist who would abuse the specters she wanted to protect by outright enslaving them, all for the “greater good” when it came to punishing those she deemed evil. Essentially she wouldn’t have been much better off than Adila, except with more actual dead souls at her disposal.

53. What was their reaction to the Black Guardian’s revelations? Do they accept or reject his offer?

Man, she shut the Black Guardian down faster than a speeding ticket. First of all, because she believed he was full of absolute horseshit, such as claiming the High Ones were powerless despite their ability to directly possess others through more than just the Red Madness. Second, she saw through his manipulations, sensing that eons in isolation several leagues under the earth while watching civilizations rise and fall would have various ways of fucking with your head. Like knows like, and Jade has an intimate understanding when it comes to madness. Moreover, she knew a delusion of grandeur when she saw one.

More than anything, though? She had literally zero desire to become a “god” as the Black Guardian had defined it. Due to her hatred for religion and the Lightborn, she refused to become the very thing she so despised. From where she stood, she didn’t even believe there would ever be such a thing as a “humanity with no ego”, as it would be impossible for her to control the hearts and minds of an entire civilization. Even if she could, she wouldn’t want to, since freedom of choice is important to her. In her mind, she thought it was better to give the current human race a chance to learn from the Order’s mistakes and remove the High Ones from the game for good, rather than lead a new civilization down the same path and just repeat the Cycle all over again. The Veiled Woman must’ve seen that there was some worth in this world if she had intervened when she did.

Ultimately it was one of the few times where her “fight” superseded her “flight” instincts. Jade also didn’t act super surprised when the Black Guardian revealed that she had been dead since she woke up in Enderal, because she kind of figured it out already (or suspected that she was just balls-to-the-wall crazy this entire time). She just didn’t know what to make of the whole truth that she was a projection the High Ones created to perpetuate the Cycle – other than to keep fighting it.

54. How does their story end?

Bittersweet. While she consumed the Dreamflower elixir before the end (and didn’t agree with Yuslan’s very random interpretation of the elixir’s effects), her choice still came at a great cost. She lost many friends in the destruction of Enderal, including Jespar. Now she and Calia are on a mission in Qyra to try and save the rest of humanity together.

Since there’s a possibility that Dijaam and Esme are still alive after their questlines, I like to think that they run into each other in Qyra at a certain point... because fate or some shit. The idea of a story where these four women (and the ghost of Zar’ah who totally became Jade’s main backup. Maybe she can finally figure out how to make Phasmal ghosts more “alive” someday) band together to save the world just delights me.

55. Do they change over the course of the story? In what ways?

For sure she does. In the beginning, Jade is a cynical, sarcastic little gremlin who doesn’t trust anyone any farther than she can throw them. She’s the very definition of the Reluctant Hero who doesn’t accept the big main quest immediately, and even tries to run away from her responsibilities the first chance she gets. It also doesn’t help that she was absolutely terrified at first with how her little “ticks” and addiction were just miraculously no longer plaguing her as much anymore, so she was already starting to question her own reality.

As Jade got to learn more about the people on Enderal and form actual friendships throughout her journey, her fondness for this world and desire to save those that live in it grew. While part of her was in the “oh, well, let the world burn” camp, she became that person less and less as time went on.

In Qyra, much about her changes as well. She becomes more driven and serious. Calia had to cut off most of her hair while rescuing her from the rubble of Ark, so not only does her hair stay shorter after that, she also no longer attempts to hide her Aeterna features (such as her ears) like she used to, mostly out of respect for the Jade who died at sea. Rather than slouching to try and appear smaller, she stands tall. The particular “treasure hunter” garb and the blue scarf she wears are little things to honor her memory of Jespar, to whom she had promised she would do her best to save humanity.

But her nightmares become significantly worse, as they are now frequented by a certain “incomplete” High One that takes the form of the Endralean civilization that fell prey to the Cleansing…

56. Anything else you’d like to share about them?

As implied in the last two responses, I had this nightmare fuel concept up my ear not too long ago: What if the Cleansing triggered on Enderal did give birth to an incomplete High One, but now it’s pissed that it never got to finish and is trying to meddle in the efforts to reconstruct the Beacon successfully? The idea of a High One actually consisting of your former allies, including the companion that didn’t survive, is just a brand of horror that I can’t resist… Not to mention really sticks a fork in Yuslan’s theory about the Dreamflower trapping you in an “Elysium where everything seems to go your way” (really, I think he was just trying to dissuade the protagonist from brewing an elixir that would obstruct his plans for revenge. I like to imagine he simply came up with the dream theory on the spot because the flower had “dream” in the name, so it was like the first thing he could think of).

Inevitably, a branch where the Endralean High One is trying to drive Jade into a Mad Prophet would throw a wrench in her and Calia’s efforts to save the world, and they’d have to go through the wringer for their romance to survive. In the end it will, but there’d definitely be some trials and tribulations in which Jade will one day have to open up about her well-guarded secrets. She would also be driven to try and save those who were consumed by the Endralean High One, whatever that may entail.

…I may or may not write an actual fic on this concept someday because I love suffering, but it has been so long since I have ever written a fic so who knows. You’re welcome and I’m sorry.

#jade the prophetess #enderal forgotten stories #enderal #vynblr #word vomit #friend's art #backstory #that hidden jade lore #for all my shitposts jade's story is REALLY messed up #it's ALWAYS been messed up even though it's evolved over the years #i miss her modern day iteration but idk if i'll ever go back to it once i've adapted her into bloodtithes #but yeah she copes with bathos #and weed #and pussy everyday

20 notes · View notes