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#im committed to the bit i dont just like old guys on my blog. i do it in real life too. anyway
carcarrot · 5 months
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one funny thing is how older guys with grey hair will always catch my eye when im out walking while at the same time the old guy im attracted to does not actually have grey hair
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spidermanifested · 2 months
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Greed or Bido for the give me character thing so you can ramble for 3 hours straight grins
okay well i uave to do both of them now. you understand this.
GREED
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how i feel about this character:
he is the perfect man. i want to lick him. no further comment
all the people i ship romantically with this character:
BIDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you know this. bido is such important representation as the first ever Fridged-For-A-Guys-Character-Development Barely-On-Screen Love Interest to be a middle aged bald man. every day i lose my marbles about how im cursed to carry this torch all by myself. four foot something homeless guy says fuck it ill do anything to save this person magnitudes stronger than myself, after ive already lost everything we built together. ill follow him into hell for the faintest chance of saving him. because hes my friend. and then he dies in his arms. abd a flashback of him looking lovingly into his eyes is the last straw to make greed accept friendship into his life again. royai WHO
i went into greed/scar in my scar post so im not typing all that out again but its also so good. extremely potent character development to be had. somebody validate me here im right
my goofy one is greed/madame christmas "married for tax benefits and also every couple years they meet up and have crazy sex" style. only a little bit because i thought about greed getting to say i fucked your mom shitlips to roy mustang.
is there ajybody else. im thinking. Uhhhhh. honestly i dont think so dvdggxf im too committed to the ones ive got and i have to put all my energy into those because NOBODY ELSE IS DOING IT!!! whole fma fandom spinning a roulette wheel to find a new random man they think is hot to ship him with every so often. when they could instead be sipping from my font of boundless wisdom.
my non-romantic otp for this character
the devils nest gang will never die. in our hearts and souls. also i need him and mei to be friends IMMEDIATELY
i DO appreciate the friendship between him and ling, but im not as nuts about it as a lot of people (i say with fondness). they can do bros attacks it is true. but they also knew each other less than a year, and sometimes it feels like people tend to. overstate i guess? the impact of ling and ed vs the whole, One Hundred Years Of Living In Human Society thing. i promise a couple of 15 year olds did not give him all that character development okay he was already basically there he just got set back a LOT because of the-- see now youve really got me rambling for 3 straight hours this wasnt even what the question was about
my unpopular opinion about this character:
wow i could have literally just waited one question to say all that. now i have to find a new one
uhhh "hes openly 200 years old and solidly established as an adult man from his very first appearance and the fact that his soul later gets a timeshare in a 15 year olds body does not change that fact and its alarming to stick your fingers in your ears and pretend that it does". is that unpopular. bbecause sometimes im so scared it is
one thing i wish had happened with this character
@catenation
okay now BIDO
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how i feel about this character
would that i could simply transmit my feelings through a less uncertain interface than words. words alone cannot do them justice. look at my blog i guess
all the people i ship romantically with this character
greed and scar ive gone into already so now we can get into the even nicher stuff. Awesome
not quite romantic but i tjink he and ulchi had a fwb thing going on. bidos into hunks with sharp teeth we already know this
hmm i think theres a lot of guys in the series hed be INTO/would be into him to some degree or another, but i dont know if itd be romantic per se? like. theres only so romantic you can get with barry the chopper even if it would be really funny. "please please please let me chop up your tail it looks so juicy. itll grow back anyway right. ive never asked before"
also for catenation i thought itd be really funny to make him and greed and yoki into an extremely lopsided love triangle, where yoki develops a weird crush on bido which manifests in very odd ways that bido cant make heads or tails of and doesnt really care to because he doesnt like him at all. does that count.
i also have. a handful of crossover ships, which grew out of roleplays with friends. bidos boytoy and boytoy-adjacent collection includes
psycho mantis from your playstation
the bad guy in the harley quinn movie but not that version of him
KING MORGOTT, LAST OF ALL KINGS
and yes. they do smoke weed.
my non-romantic otp for this character
once again the devils nest gang at large has me in a vice. i care about greed and bidos friendship as well as the romantic aspect but the fact that bido doesnt really interact with any of the gang aside from greed SUCKS and i wish we could have seen some of that
however we do at least get a flashback of bido Standing Next to blondie and one of the bouncers. which in true "desperate enjoyer of a very minor character" fashion ive extrapolated into him having been good friends with that bouncer, because from what little pagetime he gets he seems levelheaded enough to win bidos trust. at a baseline i think bido would be wary around most humans and especially just after escaping, so knowing one reliably-decent human would have probably helped a lot with readjusting to the outside. & then i think out of the chimeras he was probably on the best terms with martel and ulchi, both from Reptile Solidarity and those two being more outgoing and upbeat than average
i ALSO WISH he got to meet mei because i think theyre really similar in a lot of ways. he would relate very heavily to being small and disregarded and saddled with the responsibility of helping so many people survive by whatever means necessary. they also both love yelling indignantly at rude people which is awesome. i think theyd yell at each other like that Once and then shake hands out of respect
my unpopular opinion about this character
all my opinions about him are unpopular babey Nobody is tjinking about him as much as me!!! he is important and memorable for one. and he is so brave and he loves his friends so much. he deserves as much focus as the rest of the gang if not more. he is the gayest fma character. and his face is HANDSOME he looks like an awesome muppet and if you cant handle that then get your ass off sesame street........
one thing i wish had happened with this character:
the chaptwr after greed gets introduced should have been just 43 solid pages of bido and greed making out rapturously, with the rest of the gang doing various tasks in the background. for flavor
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prestonmonterey · 7 months
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people keep bringing back my voltron posts ;-;
(the other day someone followed me for voltron content and i felt so bad. it was a tumblr baby i had completely misled them into thinking i was a voltron blog because they had found my old posts)
just
do a voltron again
idk
/silly
i mean varians like close enough to keith--
(mmm ok i dont remember much about vld but i prolly hated alluras dad bc he was prolly a bad ruler just like her. so um. allura dad = fredrick. i guess that makes allura raps. um and this doesnt really match up but like zarkon and hagar origin story is like kinda melting point or quirin and ulla idk. hmm ok now im like commited to this au even though it makes no sense. lance and keith are cass and eugene. wait that actually works!!!! bc like lance and allura are raps and eugene but like worse. umm ok whos left. well other than appearance varian basically only matches pidge. and hunk is atilla i think. coran would be like the spooky guy from the seashell house for no reason other than mustache. pidges bot companion is rudigger. um..... oh!! almost forgot shiro. um... hes... well hes like a leader character idk. oh hunks also a tiny bit tts lance but tts lance is also like hunk and vld lance combined i think. umm yk what shiro and adam are stan and pete bc theyre the only gay characters i can think of rn /silly. villain arc cass is like axca but kinda lotor combined with all his generals
augh ok this is really long but i still prolly missed some important characters idk
(WAIT actually cass is kinda veronica. mmmm idk. actually yeah yk what cass can be both of them shes in a relationship w herself idk)
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minheeskitten · 1 year
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Vent post. Dont read if you dont want to see the following.
Tw: Dysphoria, Negative self talk. S/h ideation. Asexuality talk, arospec talk, queer struggles. suicidal ideation
Something about being on the asexual specturm.
I have the thoughts. I want to be able to write more of them.
But i always feel i write smut best when horny, you know?
Except i dont get that way often, so my reach massively drops every time i stop posting
I do love writing but the asexuality can make it hell to feel inspired to write smut.
Ive stopped wriring as much because my asexuality hits me like a truck. I dont get as wxcited as i did before.
Purity culture fucked me over so bad i cant even be normal about sexuality. Makes me feel broken for being ace.
My full queer identity is as follows, Transmasc genderfluid. Aroflux, panromantic, lithsexual, demisexual, bisexual.
Being so deeply aroace makes it hard because i feel like i dont fit in, you know?
And being transmasc in a sea of comfortable femme afab readers and writers just makes it hard for me to feel involved wheni wanna write things id absolutely enjoy.
Rhe dysphoria also hits really hard because of being someone who if you saw irl without any knowledge of my identity, youd go 'oh a woman.'
Feeling pretty dysphoric lately and been rhinking about trying to get onto Testosterone.
Most of my moots are afab and use feminine pronouns and im out here like the only transmasc here.
Im worried that people dont interact because they cant relate or cant find me. But if its not relating then how do i fix the issue? Being trans is integral to who i am. And i feel bad because of how little i can post and talk to others.
Honestly i hate being inactive. I loved my followers on my old account but i dont know how to get rhem back, because they followed me for the x reader things that i do not do anymore.
I dont do x reader because it feels wrong weiting for fem readers when im transmasc and incredibly dysphoric some days.
I cant write afab often because it makes me uncomfortable in my skin. Maybe if i get top surgery ill feel better.
Im hoping i can top surgery and be on T. Because im incredibly dysphoric as of late and just dont want to have my tits anymore. I want to be a guy.
I dont want bottom surgery that doesnt make me dysphoric its just my breats being so large.. Double D cups are not fun especially when you're trans.
Sometimes i just want to cut them off and never aee rhem again. But i know that i cant DIY that sort of thing. That would be deadly. And i dont want to abandon all of the friends ive made on here and other places.
I feel like my body was wasted on me, because i cant appreciate it the way it is. Makes me feel incredibly awful about myself. My self image is terrible.
I feel like dying would be better some days yet i dont want to leave any of my friends. They mean so much to me. Anyone who interacts means the world to me.
Rhe idea of death is a concept ive found intriguing for years. But im not sure id be able to commit. But it always starts with a bit of seld harm, doesnt it?
Sorry if this was something sad on your dash today coming from a smut blog. I dont think you were expecting that from me today.
I dont know if ill make rhis sort of vulnerable post again, but i hope that this at least gives you some of my perspective.
If you read this, thank you for taking the time to read this.
I know rhis was a vent post but like. I needed to say it.
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haikyuuscreaming · 5 years
Note
hello!! can you write something fluff with kenma, please? some friends to lovers if possible. loving your blog 💕💕
OH SHIT SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG SDFSDFJKD this is. 3.5k words roughly and im so sorry idk why my fics always come out longer than 1k words :(((
The first time you meet Kozume Kenma, he’s hiding behind the wall that is Kuroo Tetsurou and you’re both in your first year.
“Oh?” The Nekoma volleyball captain stares you down in the Chem class you share with him. “You’re [Surname]-san, right?”
“Yeah,” You say, never breaking eye contact with him but secretly eyeing the quiet boy behind him. He’s your classmate in a few other of your periods, but not this one. This class is an advanced Chemistry class, placing you conveniently with the second-years and a handful of equally smart first-years. “I need help with the homework and you’re my best bet. Could you help out?”
Kuroo narrows his eyes at you, which you don’t exactly appreciate but you don’t say anything. “You sure you don’t want me to just give answers?”
“I kinda need to understand this to pass the class, so no thanks.”
He hums in approval, like you’ve passed some test, and nods. “Sure thing. I wanted to teach Kenma this anyway.”
Oh, that’s his name… you think to yourself, and you noticed the mentioned Kenma doesn’t look up from his Nintendo Switch, even at the mention of his name. You watch Kuroo turn around to his companion, coercing him, “Kenma, get up, we’re learning Chem.”
“Can’t we do it later?” Kenma’s voice doesn’t hold anything akin to bitterness or complaint- it’s kind of devoid, actually, in a soft and cute way- and you try to tune out the sound of Kuroo scolding him but he’s so loud when he’s right next to you.
“C’mon, we’re about to go home now, we can stay after school a little longer. Plus, we get to teach this lovely lady about nuclei.”
“I’m right here, you know,” you roll your eyes lightly but before you know it, you’re defending Kozume-san. “We can always work it out, um… I dunno, maybe over lunch on Sunday? I mean, it is Friday and this thing’s due Monday and… we can have more fun studying this if we have food.”
Stupid fucking Kuroo only grins. “Oh, so you’re asking me on a date? Kinda bold, if I don’t say so myself, kouhai-chan.”
“Kuro, stop.” Kenma speaks up and his quiet voice somehow speaks volumes. “We can meet with her on Sunday to do it.” And just like that, he retreats to his Switch without another word.
Kuroo turns to you and shrugs indifferently, contrasting his previously provocative and shitfaced attitude. “The man’s laid down the law. How’s boba on Sunday sound?”
The second time you meet Kenma is on that promised study session.
He has inconspicuous earbuds in, his face illuminated by the glowing light of his DS. He has a DS, too? He still looks cute.
And there’s Kuroo of course, but he’s irrelevant to your case unless it has to do with your god forsaken chem homework.
“You want me to go order some drinks next door?” Kuroo quirks an eyebrow. “My treat.”
“Just a brown sugar milk tea, thanks,” You tell him gratefully. Thank god for men and their dead sense of chivalry.
“No boba? You’re crazy.” Kuroo scrunches his nose at you and you wish Kenma would start talking so you could avoid this big, annoying cat. “What about you, Kenma? Your usual?”
“Yeah,” is all Kenma says.
“Alright, see you nerds later,” Kuroo practically sings out, patting both of your heads like an old man, and takes something from Kenma that you don’t quite catch, but it makes Kenma glare at him.
As soon as Kuroo’s out of sight, you find it a little awkward to keep conversation with Kenma especially with his whole gamer complex, but-
Oh.
Kuroo took Kenna's DS.
“Kuroo-san’s pretty bothersome, huh,” you sigh out in an attempt to stir conversation. Lucky for you, Kenma goes along with the conversation without fight, his eyes peering over you like reflective pools of honey.
(They’re really pretty, you think.)
“Yeah,” Kenma slouches down a little bit more in his chair at the mention of his taller friend. “He’s kind of like my second mom… but not really. Always nagging me to do things.”
You laugh at his solemn, depressed answer. “It’s fun to have him around, though, right? He’s kind of funny sometimes-- the rest he’s annoying-- and he’s decently smart even though I’m pretty sure he’s got, what, three braincells.”
To your unprompted delight, Kenma laughs softly at you poking fun of Kuroo, and the conversation between you and him starts piling up into more, and more, and it all feels so short. You don’t even notice Kuroo coming back and hovering over the table.
“Eh? You and Kenma getting along without me? What a shame, you know. I really do get third-wheeled.” Kuroo lets out a wistful sigh akin to an old man and sits down, drinks in hand. “So, who’s ready to study?”
The third time you meet Kozume Kenma, it’s at your mall’s arcade.
You and your friends are playing one of those claw machines, trying to get that really cute Miku figurine and those adorable plushies, wasting all your coins on these sucker games like the dumb teenagers you are. But a glimpse of familiar, two-toned hair catches your eye.
“Hold on,” you tell your friends who’re still busy trying to get that stupidly gorgeous Sakura Miku figure. “I’m gonna be right back.”
You wander your way to the familiar head of hair, and gratefully, your instinct was right. “Kozume-san? What’re you doing here?”
Kenma practically jumps at the sound of your voice, turning around, eyes wide. “Oh. I just got lost from the team. You’re here too?”
“Mhm,” You smile, pointing at your screaming group of friends. “My friends and I are here just to chill out and have fun. You can hang with us if you want!”
He shakes his head, his hair gracefully framing his face. “Nah, I’m fine, thanks.. I’ll just hold out until Kuro sniffs me out or something.”
You furrow your brow- geez, this kid’s gonna get lost so fast-- and you gently clasp the phone he’s holding in his hand. “Can I give you my number? I’ll pick up immediately if you ever call, just give a ring.”
You fail to notice the surprise that flits over Kenma’s face, but he reluctantly hands you his phone and you tap in your number quickly. “See you around, Kozume-san. Don’t get into trouble.”
And Kenma smiles on his own accord, his face lighting up softly like a lamp under moonlight. “You too.”
The fourth time you meet Kozume Kenma, he’s at your house working on an Japanese Lit assignment.
“Oh? Kozume-kun!” You’re pleasantly surprised when your teacher pairs the two of you up. “Nice to talk with you again.”
“Yeah, “ Kenma blinks a little awkwardly and he shyly grins, which you find even more stunning than it already is because he’s usually held up such a calm, unaffected facade. “Uh. So do you want to meet up at… your house for this? So we can do the project.”
“Oh, yeah,” You wave dismissively, beaming at him because this is your chance to get closer with him. “My little brother’s a nuisance, though, so he might bother us. I hope you don’t mind?”
“No problem.. you can text me the address, because… yeah.” You find it cute how Kenma doesn’t want to mention that the two of you have been texting a lot more lately, and the slightest blush tints his cheeks.
“Of course!”
Flash to your house, the two of you are on the floor, slaving over a giant posterboard with paint and art supplies scattered about.
“I hate making movie posters, it’s so tiring…” You groan out, trying to paint Yukio Mishima’s face with the utmost care. “And this book’s so creepy… why would we wanna make a poster of it? He commits seppuku!”
Kenma grins a little bit and he looks really cute, with his hair tied up in the back and his gaze focused on the painting at hand. “You’re so easily grossed out.”
“But he made it so detailed! You're immune ‘cause you play all those gross horror games.”
He laughs quietly, and you think you're going to heaven. “You couldn't even handle Ao Oni, stop.”
You scowl at the mention of Kenma’s dumb horror games. “He’s this weird deformed grape, okay?? It was kinda scary!”
The two of you end up nowhere near finishing your poster, and you collectively decide to put it off for maybe another day. The rest of your day is spent-- c-cuddling? (no hetero, you reassured Kenma, although you were thinking otherwise)-- and playing more horror games, much to your chagrin.
(But it gave you a reason to hug Kenma tighter.)
You can’t even count the amount of times you’ve met up with Kenma now. You’re in your second-year of high school now and your bond with him as only strengthened.
He invited you eventually to walk to school with him, along with Kuroo, and you find out that it was Kuroo’s coaxing to do so. But you’re still delighted that Kenma agreed on, what, the second time Kuroo nagged him about it?
You and Kenma have gotten fairly close. You’ve vented to him, cried to him, he’s shown his emotional side, too. You’ve even gotten a little closer to Nekoma’s god, Kuroo Tetsurou (to which your friends always complain about- “you can’t take all the cute guys for yourself”). But, in your opinion, the most important part is that you’ve been getting closer to Kozume Kenma, who you once thought would always just be the quiet classmate to you. Who would always be your unattainable, close-guarded crush.
"Kenma!” You yell out, rushing over to him with your backpack practically bouncing off of you with each step. “Wait up, would you?! How do you get out of class so quick??”
 "I was waiting for you either way,” Kenma mumbles and hunches his shoulders together. “Do you wanna go to my house? I have new games and Kuroo won't be bothering us.”
“Can’t we get snacks first?” You know you sound a little bit whiny, but you’re hungry as fuck, and Kenma’s smiling either way.
“I guess.. you’re paying, though.”
“That isn’t fair at all!”
Eventually the two of you walk to your nearest 7/11 and get chips and snacks before leaving promptly, with you holding your chocolate milk and Kenma sipping apple juice. The walk to his house is full of conversation, Kenma equally engaged as you are. But as soon as you arrive at his front doorstep, the hollow noise of an empty apple juice box makes its appearance.
“You drink your juice too fast!” You tease Kenma lightly as he frowns, unlocking the door.
“You just drink too slow,” he replies and shoulders the door open. The two of you make your way inside and flop onto the couch, Kenma crouching near the TV to boot up his newest game. “Damn. I’m still thirsty, too.”
“Language, Kenma,” You chide him, throwing a pillow at him as soon as he sits down next to you on the couch. “And-” it takes every ounce of your willpower not to turn bright red. “-do you want some of my chocolate milk?”
The silence that follows is very short (probably only, what, a second or two?), but it feels like hours of painful quiet. Kenma blinks at you and the pink that dusts his ears becomes more and more prominent each second.
“Yeah… sure,” Kenma finally says and you beam so wide that you’re sure not even the sun could battle the brightness of your happiness right now. You hand him your nearly untouched chocolate milk and his fingers brush against yours as he takes it, sipping at it cautiously like he was afraid something would happen.
(Oh my god he’s so cute.. he looks so cute… he’s drinking my chocolate milk!! He’s so-)
“Oi, Kenma! My mom told me to pick up some tomatoes from y-” The door bursts open to reveal Kuroo Tetsurou.
You freeze, since Kuroo just witnessed you passing a chocolate milk box to Kenma and the latter sipping at the straw. Kenma kind of flushes, his mouth still wrapped around the plastic straw with chocolate milk halfway up.
“Eh? Sharing drinks now?” Kuroo tsks and shakes his head, a smirk gracing his stupidly arrogant face. “You know, you two could get mono. Or any other communicable diseases. Kinda risky, you know?”
“Kuroo, stop!” You’re wildly embarrassed to be caught in this not-so-platonic situation (in your opinion, at least), before Kuroo lets out a hearty laugh.
“You know, that’s an indirect kiss!”
“Didn’t I say stop?!”
“Ah, youth. Indirect kisses! You put your mouth on the straw, then he did. Romance at its finest!”
You know, deep inside, Kuroo just likes to rile you up, but you still bite the bait. “Kuroo, shut up, please??”
And Kenma speaks up for the first time during the whole banter. “Kuro, the tomatoes are on the kitchen table. Go.”
The Nekoma captain quirks an eyebrow before shrugging and heading towards the kitchen. “Thanks. Don’t do anything risky.”
“Kuroo!”
You and Kenma awkwardly glance at each other-- you note he’s still sipping your chocolate milk-- and eventually he stands off to ward Kuroo off (who keeps chuckling for no goddamn reason).
You two are alone again, and his burnt-gold eyes stare into yours.
“Did Kuro bother you?” His ears are still pinkish, but you notice that he’s still comfortable, although you can see a sheen of sweat starting to form on his face.
“Nah... “ You force your voice to stay level. “Why does he keep doing this?? God, he’s so annyoing sometimes… it isn’t like- it isn’t like we’re dating or anything.” God fucking damn stuttering.
Kenma’s eyes widen for a fraction of a millisecond, and you almost miss it, before he clears his throat. “Yeah. Not like that at all.. let’s just go back to playing.”
The atmosphere morphs into the usual, playful one that is held between the two of you, and you’re becoming proud of how much better Kenma is at redefining conversations and shifting the mood whereas in the beginning he would struggle in topic changes.
You’re so proud of him.
(And you’re kind of in love with him.)
You have a group chat with Kuroo and Kenma, unsurprisingly.
It’s, what, midnight on a school day, and the three of you are texting. Kuroo offers a game of ‘truth or dare’, and you accept out of sheer boredom. Plus, dares are so much easier to do online because you can fake nearly anything.
kuroo >:/: kenma truth or dare
kenma :): i’m not playing
YOU: yea you are !! ur not getting out of this
kenma :): fine
  don’t say anything stupid though
kuroo >:/: so whats it gonna b???
Kenma takes a good ten seconds to respond.
kenma :): truth.
kuroo >:/: you got a crush on anyone?
YOU: oooh spicy
kenma :): kuro why
Your heart races a little bit at the comment.
YOU: oh? kenma i thought we were besties :(( why wouldnt u tell me
kenma :): it isn’t that….
  kuro you already know why are you asking me that here
kuroo >:/: for my favorite kouhai [name]-chan
YOU: fuck off kuroo we all know im ur fav bc i pay for ur boba
kuroo >:/: fair
You get impatient with Kuroo’s mindless banter, so you end up texting Kenma privately.
YOU: so who is ur crush????
kenma :): why do you assume i have one
YOU: i mean….u wouldve denied it if u didnt have one?
He leaves you on seen for two minutes and you’re about to text him and complain but his reply shoots back.
kenma :): it’s you
And your heart doesn’t skip a beat. No, it just beats even faster.
The blood is rushing to your face, you can feel it, and a smile tugs at your face subconsciously. Your brain’s running a mile a minute, and you’re so outrageously shocked and unprepared that the aftermath of it all hits you just about a minute later.
(What if he’s lying? What if someone made him say that? What if-)
YOU: fr?
YOU: kenma dont mess w me
kenma :): i’m not
kenma :): you wanted to know so yeah. it’s you
kenma :): i like you and idk kuro says it’s “more than just like” and maybe he’s right
kenma :): see u at school tmr
YOU: WAIT KENMA COME BACK ???
You cute little rat, you seeth internally, happiness still radiating off of you. Is this a dream? Oh my god. Kozume Kenma likes me.
… Kozume Kenma feels the same way I feel about him.
The next day, you anxiously wait for Kenma at your doorstep. You even woke up early and had gotten ready as soon as you could, just so you could catch Kenma ASAP.
You slept surprisingly well, despite your anxiety from Kenma, and your body was filled with energy. You check your phone every two minutes, glancing at his ‘good morning text’ and praying for another one.
kenma :))): gm i’m still walking to school with u if you want… i’ll pass by your house just in case
YOU: oh!!!! yea id love to walk to school w u :))
Silence fills your ears as you anxiously pace back and forth from your doorstep to the curb of your neighborhood. You can’t help but worry as your gaze flits across every house, begging for a sign of Kenma.
(What if you’re too late, you realize in panic. What if your efforts weren’t enough?)
But then the sound of quiet-paced footsteps snaps you out, and you look up to see Kenma, standing in front of your house, an adorably shy expression painted across his face.
“Kenma!” You hate how your voice comes out kind of squeaky and high-pitched but you don’t care right now. You practically launch off of your doorstep and bound toward him, settling by his side.
He gives you a shy, adoring look but you can see the anxiety in his eyes as he points forward in the direction of Nekoma. “We can talk while walking, right?”
You smile breathlessly and your fingers brush against his. He smiles at you, and you notice the same pink dusting his ears like when he was sharing chocolate milk with you.
Two hands intertwine and the conversation begins.
You’re in your third year of college now, out on a “boys (and girl) night out”, as Kuroo deemed it.
Kenma’s got it well-made for him, striking good on his company to which you supported him through the entire time, and Kuroo’s on his way to be the scientist he’s always dreamed of being even as a nerdy-jock kid. He claims he’s practically a professional volleyball player, too, just on the side, but both you and Kenma know better.
You and Kenma have been dating ever since your second-year in high school. Which makes it just about… four-ish years now that you’ve been dating.
(Kuroo claims that in your first-year, you and Kenma were basically dating each other spiritually, but you pay him no mind.)
The three of you are out on the beach on an autumn day. It’s pretty empty, despite the warm evening sun that casts a golden shine on the sand and ocean, so you’re all making epic sandcastles in peace.
“We should make a moat,” Kuroo says, already digging out a ring around the lopsided sandcastle.
“We haven’t even finished the castle itself!” You protest, pushing him lightly as you use your other hand to pat down the base of the castle.
Kenma packs sand into a small bucket and delicately places it on top of the half-finished sand “castle” to make a tower. You find it cute how he’s the only one putting in decent effort, so you help him out by packing in another bucket of sand. “Kuro would be a terrible architect,” Kenma comments.
“You right, you right,” You sigh out while Kuroo squawks in protest. Kenma leans on you, out of instinct you think, and you kiss the top of his head gently. Kuroo covers his eyes and complains about his youth and young love before Kenma haphazardly bumps into you. Which leads to the sand castle collapsing.
“Ah- Kenma!” you cry out in panic, sweeping the sand together in a half-hearted attempt to piece it back into a cohesive castle. “Be careful!”
“No, look,” he says quietly, a small smile gracing his face.
“You worked so hard on the base too, to make it big and flat- oh?” You sit up a little bit when you see a small velvet box in the middle of the sand pile.
Kuroo gasps very loudly and you stare at Kenma in shock.
Oh my god. What’s happening, what’s happening, oh my god-
You slowly reach out for the box in the middle of the mess and take it delicately, brushing off the sand clinging to it. Your fingers pry it open with shaking fingers and you feel Kenma place his hand on your arm gently, his gorgeous honey eyes staring at you. The same honey eyes you fell in love with.
You're also in love with the gorgeous, sparkling amber ring that sits in the middle of the cushioned box.
“[Name]. I want to be married. To you. Will you marry me?” Kenma’s voice is soft and sweet but you know with the convincing sureness in his voice that he’s been practicing this line for at least a month and he’s become confident in it.
You start crying immediately (god damn it, you think to yourself) your heart blooming with joy and your entire body feels like it’s about to explode of pure happiness.
You kiss him, full on the lips with tears streaming down your face and he kisses back, his arms wrapping around you and you realize he’s crying too. With the possibly happiest voice you’ve ever used in your life, you cry out, “Of course I will!” on the beach with Kuroo clapping in the background.
Two years later on that beach, you two become the happiest couple on Earth.
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tuggism · 4 years
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just a little note
So I haven’t been on this blog in a whileeeee and I'm not even sure anyone will see this. But I was a longtime fan of RT/AH during my literal formative years - completely obsessed for maybe 2012-2017. I loved all the shows and especially LOVED Achievement Hunter, as you can probably tell from the blog lol. I’ve slowly stopped watching videos, but I still have those “comfort” videos you know like the ones that you’ve seen so many times but you keep watching bc its like meeting an old friend again. now I dont know if I can anymore?
I just wanted to vent and its funny how the urge to vent brought me back into my childhood Tumblr lol. but I heard the news last night and I, like everyone, was COMPLETELY blindsided. I cant even begin to explain the flurry of emotions and thoughts I had inside. I loved Ryan. I truly loved them all. I’m so confused. I’m so sad that hes leaving but then I feel bad for feeling sad because of what he has done. I feel so bad for his family. this is such an ethically muddled situation
He cheated on his wife for years. This shit wasn’t just a single instance - it was over the course of like what? 2 years? Maybe if I was younger I would’ve thought of this differently. Maybe I would’ve been able to personally move on from this and still enjoyed him in past videos and maybe even preached to other people to forgive him. But I’m not my younger self. I’m 22, in a loving committed relationship, and there is only pain even at the thought of being cheated on. That is all there is. I cant imagine the pain? his wife might be going through. I saw the video Tess posted. I slowed it down, even read as much as I could. It was some inexplicable attempt at forcing myself to bear witness to what he had done, in order to finally take him down from the pedestal I didn’t even know I had supplied him with in my mind. It was disgusting. It had all the echoes and similarities with gross and cringe conversations you have over snap with boys you meet on tinder. He even mentioned his kids to her a few times. That really kicked the fucking bucket over. Why would you ever mention your kids by name to your mistress? What was he thinking? what fucking insane state of mind was he in??
He was always the wholesome, family man, married to his high school sweetheart, 2 young kids, HAPPY NUCLEAR FAMILY. Well that online persona did not age well. There are so many issues with this situation. The fan/celebrity dynamic that’s beyond fucked up... I’ve never experienced anything of that magnitude but I remember a few years ago when a guy that was considered “a name” started talking to me. And I ignored all the red flags because even the small rush of adrenaline was so good. A few years ago I was at a university event and was constantly hit on by this guy who was more popular, slightly older, and it felt good. We didn’t do much but when I found out a few days later that he had a girlfriend for the last 3 years, the guilt was immeasurable. But I'm not going to lie. Even after the fact, there was still this TINY, SMALL, like 2% of me, that .. wanted even just a little bit more of that attention. So when Tess says that she did things she normally wouldn’t do because of the attention from her LITERAL idol, I believe her. I believe it. As crazy as it sounds, thats the thing that could've made all thought of Ryan’s family not enter the decision making process.
It is selfish of me, but I cant help but feel so sad for AH. These people worked with him, were friends with him for the better part of a decade. I dont think you could deny his part in AH’s popularity. To me, he was so integral. I thought AH and I thought Ryan Haywood. So many iconic moments that I think of with the HIGHEST childhood nostalgia, involved Ryan. All that is tainted now. Completely tainted. everything feels wrong, everything feels off-colour. I basically grew up with AH and this man. I grew up with them. AH was literally my safe space when serious trauma happened in 2017-2018. I’d put on my old favourite videos and play them so that I could fall asleep easier. That’s how much I loved them. 
I dont know what im saying. I just needed to say something and get it off my chest so that I can move on. I dont know what my personal relationship with RT/AH will look like now. I’ll be lingering to watch how they deal with this situation, but honestly I’d become a very very casual fan anyway by this point. But its more the detriment to my memories of AH that have caused me great sadness. ITs just all sadness. All sadness.
I agree that people can make mistakes. Cheating just happens to be a VERY BIG mistake. I’ve personally known people who have cheated on their partner. They’re not the most vile, unforgivable people. They just made a mistake. And they have changed. I hope Ryan can get the help he needs. Most of all I hope his family can forgive him. If his family is broken over this he will literally spend the rest of his life atoning for it. Nothing else - nothing about losing his job or fans or public reputation being ruined - will compare with the loss of his family. Dont get me wrong - my opinion on Ryan has drastically changed in the last 24 hours. But I want to be emotionally distant. I want to move on with my life. 
This was so long and so incoherent. I just rambled on and on. I dont expect anyone to have read this lol but just know that if you’re confused and conflicted, you’re not alone.
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stimmypaw · 4 years
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stimmypaw reads Thunder & Shadow, another blog post
much like the first time, I am continuing to read A Vision of Shadows for the first time and sharing my thoughts as I go! This post of course has a bunch of spoilers for Thunder and Shadow. It’s all in the read more, have fun!
I'm so glad echosong is okay but what will she do??? Where will she go??? I'm so worried
I don't like it that Briarlight is stuck in the medicine den all day, love to see her playing with kits and showing her strength tho she's so sweet and good she deserves better
Now littlecloud is sick too???? Fuck!!!!
Also seems Needlepaw and Alderpaw haven't managed to get along better yet, maybe Alderpaw can talk to her through Leafpool since she's going to Shadowclan?
Also graystripe is awful as always and I love him 2 bits
I love Rowanstar's character too, he's so stupidly proud. Shadowclan has a fun trend of having a long line of mediocre to awful leaders and I feel bad for Tawnypelt, Shadowclans braincell who should be leader.
Jayfeather is gonna miss his friends
YES, SKYCLAN!!!! SKYCLANNNN
Twigkit lifting her front paws im 💖💖💖💖 AAAAA BABY
Graystripe :] he's silly
Omg feather time
If something bad happens to this feather ill fraud my taxes I will commit many crimes this delivery must happen safely and if anyone takes it from violetkit I will Kill
Omg sleekpaw don't be so mean poor littlecloud :c medicine cats are important!!
I see alderpaw leaving his feather behind alderpaw get it to violetkit Now
Oh God imagine being puddlekit, shadowclan needs to get its shit together real fast
Leafpool is just that picture (i do not see) while trying to process the mess they got her in
OKAY SO I'm glad he's getting along with needlepaw and that he can finally give violetkit her feather but LITTLECLOUD GUYS??? LITTLECLOUD?????????
My heart melted with violetkit, this was so sweet, why are the queens so mean to her??? She's just an autistic icon bro!! Like every cat I like in these books.
Alderpaw: hey I have an idea, why don't we commit crimes?
Needlepaw: FINALLY I THOUGHT YOUD NEVER ASK
VIOLETKIT POINT OF VIEW FINALLY???? FUCK YES YESSSS YES YES SHADOWCLAN TIME IM SO HAPPY THIS IS SO COOL
Last time this happened the character immediately died tho
Hm
I am suffering for violetkit
i wish violetkit would spend more time with leafpool im sure she’d be caring maybe?? maybe im just desperate for violetkit to be loved
no one here knows how to treat a kit
OH YES YESSS
YESSSSSSSSSSSSS SSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATHEYRE TOGETHER AGAIN
im so sad
im 
broooooo
aaaaa i hope needlepaw treats violetkit better from now on, this is hearbreaking.
Fuck I knew it, the rogues are coming for them aren’t they? And where’s Skyclan now????? fuck fuck fuck
ok I have no clue who Fernsong is but he’s funny already why is he like this what is happening why is he blocking them from looking at Honeykit while talking about how worried he is about her?? Absolutely misterious I love him
  Jayfeather 🤝 Yellowfang
 “I don’t want kits around me”
oh the girls are fighting
oh the girls ARE fighting
furzepelt had a cool name im sorry to hear he only existed to die immediately :c
onestar also is very proud, im glad he accepted help this time tho
SPARKPAW MED CAT MOMENT HAHAH
i forgot bumblestripe was a cat and i was wondering if it was just a typo for bramble
also what’s up with dove and tiger??? i forgot everything about their relationship in the previous books because i don’t care about it and the erins tend to write some pretty boring straight couples
the way they’re described makes me feel like needlepaw and sleekpaw are just differently colored versions of each other at times, are they related?? they don’t seem to be.
and here’s the bit that’s previewed, oh boy, it must have been seriously scary being violetkit, but i hope they don’t convince her the clans hate her :c thunderclan likes her shadowclan just sucks
What do these background cats want from Twigkit???? To shoot lasers out of her eyes?? I guess she isn’t magical or anything but also she’s just a kit??? Firepaw was also just a kittypet and he’s a big deal :/// y’all just don’t get it, I hope Twigkit doesn’t get Dovepaw’s protagonist anxiety
I know Twigkit is being scolded but this scene is just so cute like Jayfeather is just tucking her in a moss bed while being mad at her for leaving camp
Thats another one I need to draw i love them
SPARKPELT YESSSSS YESS SYE SYES YES 🎊🎉🎉🎉🎊🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈💖💖💖💖💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💕
Mothwing ableist????? That's cringe
Omg poor kestrelflight
Jayfeather misses Leafpool so bad, Puddlepaw must feel awful though
OLD AGE? H HOW OLD IS LEAFPOOL THEN???
?????? OH GOD IM LOVING THIS???
This apprentice rebellion is Nuts its so good oh fuck!!! I'm loving whats happening here its awful and perfect
Violetkit is getting bitter :c she needs 2 be embraced and loved stat
She is also clearly getting some bad dependency and abandonment issues, desperate to do anything to please so she won't be left alone again :c
FUCK NO NO NO AAAA NEEDLEPAW WHAT WWERE YOU THUNKING??????? JESUS POOR VIOLETKIT
Kitnapping, this is bad
Oh, very interesting
These apprentices and rogues are so smart god this is a perfect plan
Twigkit absolutely is the sunshine
I love her interactions with Alderpaw, I wish she had gotten to see her sister
In comparison Violetkit looking around camp desperate for attention is awful
Oh fuck bribing
NEEDLEPAW DONT BE MEAN TO VIOLETKIT :C
Oh fuck ou fuck the 4chan kids are angry
??? BRO WHAT??? DONT KICK OUT VIOLETKIT, THATS WHY YOUR APPRENTICES TURNED INTO ANCAPS DAMN
I'm angy
Oh no
Something bad happened :c
Bramblestar: good day!
Rowanstar: Oh Is it??? You could say that while starving in winter, cringe ass
Mistystar: its not winter tho
Onestar: well you're fat
God rowanstar must be obliterated
Hey where's the rowanstars maps use idk loon on a lake or something this man has angst!!!
I appreciate Ivypool is her mentor, at least Someone is honest about whats going on and hey they can both relate on the fear of not being special! Ivypool can be very good to Twigpaw im counting on her
Oh fuck
Violetpaw sounds like she's in trouble with the rogues :c aa
AAAA TWIGPAWWWW AAAA
Violetpaw don't be mean about your sister :C she misses you so bad
Sleekwhisker is like that dad that let his kid starve until she learned to open a bean can she didn't want
Holy fuck
Aaaa violetpaw D:
Jesus christ that was awful
That was so intense I was so nervous for Violetpaw, I'm really happy for her now aaaa
Another gathering already? Wowie
I hope Shadowclan gets those herbs soon :c
I see he appeal in FernIvy and I appreciate it
Violetpaw and Twigpaw sharing a den my heart......this is IT
Jayfeather: I want to steal
I'm listening to Burn Pygmalion! and "viscious kin" is very fitting for this series ehhehe
I love violetpaw and twigpaw btw
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IM CRYING
I cant believe Alderpaw is an all lives matter kinda guy
Yesss rebel get those herbs alreadyyy
Starclan has agreed to let kestrelflight kill onestar, goodbye onestar /j
Epic I love you harespring
Alderpaw being confused at Jayfeather saying he is proud is the Best
What an ending! Terrifying and hopeful at the same time, I am very excited to see the hijinks Bramblestar and Rowanstar will get into and how they will go searching for Skyclan, it was PAINFUL to have that prologue talking about them with 0 hope of them showing up again Nothing Nada Zilch, feels like that and the ending were just 2 remind us that that was still the major plot point hahaha, I appreciate it I guess. I'm glad Violetpaw and Twigpaw are on uh good terms despite it all, not very ideal and they're both upset but they still consider each other siblings and know they care about each other :'0 Alderheart getting his name is epic too!!! I was hoping he would soon. I loved everything about his interactions with Jayfeather here, loved all the characterizations really it was just top notch, Onestar being a bastard, Needletail, OH AND SHADOWCLAN JOINING THE ROGUES, top notch!!!! The ancap apprentices were a riot.
This was a good book!!! Flowed very nicely and smoothly, reading in shadowclan's point of view for more than around 3 chapters was great. I can barely wait for the rest!!! Will Violetpaw find belonging in this new era of Shadowclan??? Or will she leave again??? Will Alderheart somehow figure out where Skyclan is and get them together at the lake??? Will Twigpaw get all the spicy details of Dovewing's secret romance with Tigerheart??? Who knows!! But I am very excited to find out what happens next :D
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let-it-raines · 6 years
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Second in Command (Epilogue - Part Seven)
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Summary: Life as the “spare to the heir” isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be when you’re the supposed screw-up of the family, but people don’t know what really happens behind closed doors.
Rating: Mature
A/N: You guys are totally going to be annoyed with me for how I left it on a cliffhanger when I totally didn’t have to except to show some character growth and how things change...which I guess is exactly the reason I ended it that way :D
Found on AO3: Beginning | Current
Tumblr Chapters: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14| 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20
Epilogue Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 
Tag list: @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @kmomof4 @wellhellotragic @ekr032-blog-blog @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615@a-faekindagirl @mayquita @captainsjedi @captswanis4vr @kristi555 @teamhook @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @branlovesouat @dreadpirateemma @alys07 @andiirivera
“Can I come in, son?”
“Yeah, of course,” Killian answers automatically, the shock of his father just showing up at his door stunning him for only a moment. It’s not like he never visits. He usually just calls or texts first. “I didn’t know you were coming over, dad. Why didn’t you call?”
“Oh, I was visiting the kids and thought I’d drop by since I knew that the two of you had returned home.” His dad steps inside, squeezing his shoulder before leaning down to pet Indy. “Hello, darling,” he then greets Emma, kissing her cheek before wrapping her up in a hug. “How are you feeling today?”
“Good, good,” Emma insists, her eyes still blown wide as if she’s actually been shocked. He knows she’s still a bit rattled from the flight and her nausea. The same thing had happened when they went out sailing the morning of their anniversary, before the disaster of the rest of that day, and even though he had been wary of it, Emma insisted she was fine. She never said she wasn’t, but the green of her face told him otherwise. “How are you?”
“Kicking pretty high for my age.”
“You are not old,” she laughs, tugging on Indy’s leash. “Do you mind if I take Indy for a quick walk? Let her run around a bit. She’s been told she’s going outside, and I’m afraid she’ll freak out if she doesn’t get to go.”
“Of course, dear. I’ll chat with Killian, and the second you two come back inside, I want to hear all about how you’ve been since you left us to go holiday in the warm sunshine. I swear it’s rained for the past week.”
“Sounds like a plan.” Emma takes a step over toward him, leaning up and kissing his cheek, whispering that she’ll be right back before taking a step outside with Indy and leaving him with his dad.
“Do you want something to drink? Eat?”
“I’m fine.” His father begins walking to the living room, settling down into the recliner he prefers when visiting all while Killian sits down on the couch next to him, only a side table between them. “So how was your holiday?”
He almost chokes on his own saliva thinking of all of the things he absolutely cannot tell his father about their holiday as well as wondering if he should bring up the privacy issue just yet. He doesn’t know, is never truly sure about these types of things. He could have a nice, normal conversation with his father or it could turn into another tense, stressful one. He’s had enough of those for a lifetime, but he also knows that he doesn’t have all of the time in the world to fix this. He’s got fewer than four months, really.
“It was wonderful,” he finally answers, his lips ticking up on one side. It really was wonderful to get away with Emma and only have each other for awhile despite the disaster that was their anniversary. It got better, though. It wasn’t completely bad. They had the sailing trip and the takeout meal that was better than anything else they’d eaten if only for how comfortable they both felt. He felt his son move for the first time, which was bloody brilliant and most definitely his new favorite thing. “It’s a gorgeous island. Emma mentioned something about asking you to make our beaches like that.”
Brennan barks out a laugh, the wrinkles on his face all gathering together while his gray hair shakes the slightest bit. If Killian was a betting man, he’d guess his dad is getting his hair cut in the next two or three days, keeping up with his lifelong schedule of haircuts. “If only I could. That would be bloody wonderful. But I like the way she thinks.”
“She’s definitely a brilliant dreamer.” He trails off toward the end of his sentence, looking down at his hand and twisting his ring around his finger, his constant physical reminder of his lifelong commitment to Emma, as if he really needs one. “Can I talk to you about something, dad?”
“Of course.”
“I know, well, I know that things were different when I was a kid, that technology wasn’t as advanced, that I was a bit of a surprise child and that you were on the older side when I was born.”
“Well, why don’t you just call me elderly then, Killian? And you have absolutely no proof that you were a surprise child.”
His dad laughs when he speaks, but Killian isn’t finding a lot of humor in it, knowing that he’s likely going to upset Brennan with his words.
“What I mean is, I know you weren’t really, truly involved in my life. And I’m not blaming you or trying to make you feel…upset, but I need a very particular kind of advice that really only you and mum or Liam and Abigail can give. And I’m honestly not even sure you can give it.”
“What’s wrong, Killian?”
He takes a moment to collect himself, hundreds of words on the tip of his tongue but none of them feeling quite right. But he has to say something, so he might as well speak the truth.
“How the hell am I supposed to be a father in a world where I can’t protect the privacy of my wife and my child? There were, um, photographers who rented out a house and used scopes to take pictures of us on the beach. And Emma and I got into a pretty nasty argument about it. She’s worried…I’m worried about Andrew’s privacy. We want him to live a life as normal as possible. We don’t want photographers following him to school or to the park, and I just – I don’t know how to fix it.”
He’s been clenching his fist all while he talks, the tenseness in his hand almost painful while hot tears form in his eyes, every fault and every insecurity he’s had long before the fight with Emma coming back and assaulting his senses, making everything a dark, cloudy blur.
Brennan looks calm, secure, the blue of his eyes not changing while his eyelids rapidly blink, his brows furrowing and the lines on his face increasing. Has he said too much? Shown too much emotion? Asked for the impossible?
“The fact that you have very obviously beaten yourself up about this proves that you are a better dad than I ever have been.”
“That’s not what I meant, dad. I didn’t – ”
“I know, Killian. I’m not taking offense to anything. I was a poor excuse for a father for the majority of your life. I was focused on Liam, on my job, on the protocol and the way that my father raised Albert and me. All I knew was that fathers were not supposed to be close to their children, and as much as that hurt me as a child, I stupidly believed it. The fact that you have forgiven me is something I still can’t believe.”
He leans over and places his hand on Brennan’s knee, patting him before leaning back and wiping at his eyes. “I did it for me, but with the way you’ve worked to change, you deserve it.”
“Thank you, my boy.” His father smiles, settling back into his chair and crossing his hands together in his lap. “But this is not about me. This is about you and your family. So you don’t want Andrew in the public eye? At all? Is that what you’re saying?”
“I mean, we haven’t discussed it in serious length, but yes. I’m sure that Emma will be okay with releasing the occasional photo or having him join us when we go overseas so we don’t have to be apart from him, but I think we’re going to have to take a step back in traditions. And when he gets older, I think we may need to move somewhere much more private.”
The front door opens then, the alarm beep sounding at the same time that he hears the click of nails and the squeak of sneakers as well as Emma’s voice. He straightens up, fixing his hunched back and sitting against the couch in as much of a relaxed position as he can.
“Go find, Killian, girl, yeah,” Emma coos, her voice getting louder the closer she gets to the living room. And then she’s in view, Indy running in first and jumping up on the couch before getting down once she spots Brennan, less familiar people always more exciting than him. Emma walks toward him, sitting down in the seat Indy just vacated and reaching around him to tangle her fingers in his hair, stroking the strands. “What’s wrong? Your shoulders are tensed.”
How the hell does she always know?
“Killian and I,” his father answers for him, seemingly understanding that Killian wasn’t sure what to say, “were simply talking about how you two seem to be suffering from some privacy issues and are worried about your child’s future, that you want Andrew to lead a more private life than normal.”
“Oh,” Emma gulps, her hand stilling in his hair before beginning again, “well, yeah. I know that we all grew up differently and that my childhood isn’t really an option, but that’s what I want, what we want. We want him to be able to be a kid, you know? I don’t want him to be used to cameras everywhere he goes. I don’t know how we’d fix that, but that’s definitely my top priority right now. And forever probably.”
His hand finds Emma’s knee, thumb running back and forth over the material of her leggings while she speaks. He’s here with her, for her, consistently, and he hopes that she knows this.
“Why don’t you two give me some time to think things over? I’ll meet with security. We’ll work out some plans and ideas. You two should probably talk to Liam and Abigail. It’s not, well, it won’t be exactly the same. You have more freedom than them, and they’re not quite as private as the two of you. But they do have experience in all of this.” “Thank you, Brennan,” Emma sighs, leaning back into the couch and scratching at his neck, his eyes fluttering closed for a quick moment.
“Of course, but at the end of the day, above everything else, we’re a family. How you two feel is far more important than any sort of duty and tradition we have, even if I do ask that we stick to the important ones.”
“Actually, I have something else that I want to talk about.”
His head snaps to her, eyes searching for what she has to say, but she’s not looking at him, her gaze trained on the wag of Indy’s tail while her fingers tap over his on her leg, the hand in his hair having stilled.
“What do you want to talk about, love?”
She looks at him then, the smallest of smiles on her face that comforts him the slightest bit, before directing her gaze to Brennan. “I don’t want to walk out of the hospital all made up hours after giving birth. Kudos to Abigail. She is a badass woman for that, but that’s not what I want. Andy doesn’t need to be exposed to so many people as a newborn. I don’t need to be all dressed up when I’ve just given birth. I don’t care about tradition when it comes to this. This is what I’m doing, and I really feel like it’s the first step in taking a stand about him not being some kind of public property.”
He didn’t know she felt that way about any of that, nearly every word she said news to him, but he gets it, supports it. If that’s what Emma wants for this, that’s what they’ll do. He’s never quite understood that tradition anyways, and he likes the idea of a more private celebration with just them and their families while Emma heals and they adjust to the terrifying process of being parents for the first time.
“I’m not sure we can do that, dear.”
“What?” His head snaps over to his dad, trying to process the words. “You literally just said that how we feel is more important than any duty we have.”
“But that we need to stick to the important traditions, yes. New family members are an important tradition.”
“Brennan,” Emma grits, her voice strained as she tries to keep it friendly, “I respect our family and all of the traditions we have, but I am not some kind of human machine who’s only here to produce babies. Yes, of course this is a big deal, but it’s a big deal for us as a personal family, not as some part of the institution. You can still put the sign up, make any and all announcements you want. Hell, I’ll release a picture if we have to, but all I’m asking is that we’re allowed to leave and travel home in peace.”
“I agree, dad. I mean, really. Of all of the things we break and bend, of all of the things we change, surely you can let this one thing go? It’s not hundreds of years ago where people are faking pregnancies and paternities to keep the line intact, which was ridiculous then. I think letting family be family is the most important thing, don’t you?”
“Aye, it’s just…you’ll have to forgive me.” Brennan runs his hand over his face, visibly warring something within himself, the lines on his face stressing. “You were right earlier when you said things are different now. These are not things that I really went through with you, not as prevalent as you. Emma, dear, I’m sorry. I don’t…I shouldn’t have ever considered making you do something you’re not comfortable with. I love you dearly, and you and Killian know what’s best here, not me.”
“I don’t want to disappoint you,” Emma says, getting up from the couch and sitting down on the edge of the coffee table so that she can squeeze Brennan’s hand. “You are so brilliant, and you uphold this family so well. I know that I’m different, that it was difficult to accept me, but change can be good, you know?”
“I know.”
Brennan stays for a little while longer, hashing out a few more details with them before accepting a cup of tea and some food, finally listening to them talk about their holiday all the while scratching behind Indy’s ears, her eyes closed in bliss the entire time. It’s peaceful, relaxing, and he feels his shoulders loosen the longer the conversation goes on, Emma’s laughter and joyful voice sounding throughout the room. In the back of his mind, though, he keeps replaying the conversation, thinking of everything he said, everything they all said, and he’s amazed it all went as smoothly as it did, surprised that his father acquiesced to their private exit from the hospital so easily. He had no idea that Emma wanted that, and he wonders how long she’s been toying with the idea, how many late nights she’s spent worrying about bringing it up. He knows she didn’t just think of it now, that it wasn’t spur of the moment, and he tries to remind himself to ask her about it later, to make sure that there’s nothing else she’s hoarding inside.
She goes through enough, has gone through enough over the years, and she shouldn’t feel like she has to hold things back from him.
But he saves his thoughts for later, letting his dad leave and letting Emma take a nap, her eyes falling shut without her even laying down on the couch. He wakes her before she can get into too deep of a sleep, though, knowing that it’ll hurt her back, and helps her go upstairs to their room, ignoring the curses she’s muttering under her breath about him waking her up. While she sleeps, he goes downstairs to his office, answering emails and clearing out his inbox that he left alone while they were in Spain.
Summer is normally a slow time for them, June and July full of engagements while August is usually taken off to spend in Balmoral. Emma’s due in September, though, a few days after his birthday, and she’s not working after August begins. He is, though, doing his regular work and making a few short trips, making sure never to never travel more than three hours away in case he needs to be home.
But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have things to do now, organizing his files and reviewing the financials for Kidding a Goal until Indy comes walking into his office, her nails clicking against the wood until she’s staring up at him with her mouth wide open, tongue practically falling out of her mouth. He checks his watch and sees that it’s far past seven. He’s surprised she didn’t come and get him two hours ago.
“You ready to eat, my girl?”
That gets her tail wagging before she takes off, running toward the kitchen at such a pace that she’s probably there before he even gets up from his chair. Sure enough, she’s already waiting next to her bowl like the most well-behaved dog in the world, which is not something he expected when he and Emma decided to get a dog last year. But she’s done well, their training working most of the time, but Indy does have the tendency to lick his face when he’s sleeping. He’s not a fan of that.
But she’s his best bud and a constant companion on his runs, so it all evens out.
After feeding her, he hears footsteps coming down the stairs, Emma wandering into the kitchen with sleep-rumpled hair and pillow streaks on her face, her pajama top falling off of one shoulder. She immediately heads toward the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water and some yogurt before settling down on a barstool.
“How’d you sleep?”
She grunts in response, opening her yogurt and eating a large spoonful. “I hate being pregnant sometimes.”
“So not well then?”
“Nope. I felt like my guts were all being squeezed out, but do you know who’s not moving now that I’m awake and out of bed?”
“Andy.”
“Yep.”
She keeps eating her yogurt, quickly finishing it up before getting another carton. He should probably fix something for dinner so she doesn’t consume the entire yogurt supply in their fridge.
“Hey, sweetheart?”
“Yeah?” she mumbles, pulling her spoon out of her mouth and looking up at him, her hair deflating the slightest bit from when she came down.
“You want to tell me what that was earlier? With my dad. When did you decide you didn’t want to do the public announcement?”
“Oh, um, I first thought about it a few weeks ago, but it was really driven home after last week. Why? You have an issue with it?”
“No,” he laughs, leaning down across from her and propping his elbows on the counter. “I think it’s bloody brilliant, that you are brilliant. I like that you want to do things your way…our way. It’s very sexy.” “Oh boy, if you’re looking to get laid right now that is not happening.”
“Well damn. Now I have no reason to compliment you.”
“Shut up,” she groans, tossing her spoon over into the sink, the metal clanking. “But seriously, you’re okay with all that, right?”
“Of course. I want you to do what makes you comfortable. I’m not the one giving birth.”
“Damn right. I think I’m going to give your dad a heart attack though.”
“Aye, definitely. I know he’s trying and he’s being accommodating, but I could practically see the fear of breaking traditions rolling off of him in anxiety-filled waves. But he’s seventy-three. Some things just aren’t going to change.”
“So basically we hit the jackpot today?”
“Yep.” He walks over to the fridge, opening it up and seeing what they have left over from before they left. “What do you want for dinner?”
-/-
“Bloody buggering hell,” he curses, bringing his thumb to his mouth and soothing where he just jammed his finger on the wood.
Building a crib should not be this difficult, but it apparently is. He’s been following the instructions exactly, making sure that each piece is doubly secure, and he’s not sure how it’s taking this long. He should be finished, this crib should be made, and he should be able to move onto the shelves or Emma’s glider that she was insistent on them getting.
He’s spent more time in this room in the past month than he has in any other room in the house, June somehow running away with itself all while he’s been hidden away within these four walls. It took a month and a half for he and Emma to decide on a simple light gray, one that he’s pretty sure is also in their bedroom, but honestly, once they both agreed on the color (likely because they have agreed on it once before), he wasn’t going to say anything else. He did pick out the gray-ish blue that’s on the wall with the shelves (or at least where they’ll go once he gets to them), so he’s pretty proud of it.
Neither he or Emma are much one for designing, though they have gotten a bit more into it since the remodel of the apartment, but he’s pretty proud of how Andy’s room is shaping up, even if the lad will stay in the bassinet in their room for awhile. It’s a simple room, clean lines and clean colors. All of the furniture are different shades of white and warm browns, woods really, with natural accents. Abigail gifted them a large wooden giraffe along with some leaf and animal prints, so those are sitting in the corner waiting to be placed after all of this furniture is built.
His favorite part, though, is definitely going to be the little sitting area by the shelves and the changing table. He’s not under any impression that this is going to be a calm room, a place to relax, but he figures there have to be times when he’s rocking Andy back to sleep in that very spot, the shelves filled with colorful children’s books that’ll become routine reading one day as well as being filled with several stuffed animals and photo frames that he can’t wait to update with pictures. Of course, the cabinets below will be filled with the essentials, the things no one likes to talk about like diapers and nipple cream (that was something Emma did not want to know about, and he honestly doesn’t blame her), but they’re definitely still in the dreamy, picture perfect nursery phase where the messiness of a child isn’t quite a factor.
Really to him, as much as he knows this is real, as much as he sees the physical proof, feels the physical proof (which holy shit is it incredible to be able to feel his son move), it’s still difficult for him to comprehend that in two months he and Emma will have a child. It’s something they’ve talked about for years, something they were planning on, but it’s difficult to put into words just how much love he has for his son.
And his wife.
She’s a rockstar in every sense of the word, and if he doesn’t mention it enough, Emma sure as hell will. He loves her fiercely, and that love is another thing that he can’t quite put into words. He honestly doesn’t understand men who moan and groan about their wives constantly. If anything, he finds it disgusting. Yes, you’re going to have disagreements with your significant other. That’s natural when you decide to spend your life with someone who has their own wants, needs, and opinions, but at the end of the day, his wife is his best friend. If there’s anyone he wants to spend time with, it’s her. No question.
If the answer to who your best friend isn’t your spouse or the person you’re marrying, he doesn’t understand why the hell you’d bother getting married. His mates are great, but they’re not Emma.
Maybe he is a bit of the cheeseball that Emma always claims him to be, but he likes it that way.
He’s definitely going to embarrass his kids. All of the time. He can’t wait. He’s got a few years, but he can’t wait.
“You know we can hire someone to do this, right?” Emma asks, a bit of laughter in her tone that makes him roll his eyes. His best friend, most definitely. The teasing is just a small part of that.
“Aye, but I’ve started it, and I intend on finishing it.” “Okay, but the crib doesn’t need to fall apart while there’s a baby inside of it, and the glider doesn’t need to fall apart while I’m sitting on it. That’s, like, a double disaster, and I know you lived by yourself for a long time, but I’m pretty sure you’re not capable of that anymore.”
“Oh, really? Because I was just going to make them as unsafe as possible so that I could live by myself again. I miss being able to stretch out in the bed.”
“You’re so funny,” she teases from the other side of the nursery where she’s putting away the washed clothes in the closet, organizing them by size. He swears they have enough clothes to last Andy for the first two years of his life, and that’s not counting the piles of things he knows David and Mary Margaret have at their house. “I think I may have bought him too much stuff. I don’t even think I own this many things.”
“You don’t mess your clothes up multiple times a day.”
“Good point.”
“I tend to make those.”
“Eh. Debatable.”
“Not at all debatable.” He turns back to the crib, looking at the instructions to see if he can remember where he left off before Emma distracted him. “Shit, this is impossible.”
“I can call my dad, babe. It won’t be a problem. He’s a bit handier than you.”
“Please, I am plenty handy.”
“Okay, well being handy with me is not the same as being handy when it comes to building things.”
“If we call your dad, he’s going to take over. I want to do some of this myself.”
“I will tell Dad just to help. Come on, babe, you love spending time with my dad.”
“Only now that he doesn’t give me the scary speeches anymore.”
“Yeah, I bet those were a lot of fun.”
“I mean, it’s been a solid half a decade since I’ve gotten one, but he still shakes me to my core.”
He hears Emma laugh, snort really, before she makes her way over to him, slowly settling down on the floor next to him and waving her hand until he gives her the instructions. She looks over them while looking at the crib, her eyes continuously darting between the two.
“You put part G in backwards. That’s why nothing after that is fitting.”
“Bloody hell,” he curses, reaching over and taking the instructions from her hand and checking to see if she really did just solve his problem, “how did you see that when I’ve been staring at it for the past hour?”
“Fresh eyes, my love. Fresh eyes.” She leans forward and kisses his cheek before falling back against the wall. “And that’s exactly why calling my dad and asking him to come over in the morning will be a great idea. I bet Mom will want to come too, and she does a mean job with a power drill.”
So Emma calls her parents who agree to come over in the morning. On top of moving, they’ve also begun to change around the hours of the pub, opening it earlier and letting Will close it out at night. And it’s because of this that they show up at eight in the morning, he and Emma both still asleep when their doorbell rings. Emma groans when she hears it, burying her face into his chest and making it impossible for him to get up without disturbing her. He can feel Andy summersaulting around in her belly, and he smiles to himself knowing that she’s going to have get up. She can’t sleep when he’s moving around like that.
He can’t sleep when Emma’s basically running marathons in bed, but that’s not something he’s going to voice out loud. He can get up and sleep in a guest room if he needs to. Emma can’t get up and walk away from the person who’s running marathons in her stomach.
There’s two human feet inside of her. That’s pretty weird if he thinks about it too much.
Okay, so really weird.
Slowly but surely he gets out of bed, letting Emma flip over into his spot, and heads downstairs to open the front door. David and Mary Margaret have a key, but they never use it, always waiting for either he or Emma to open the door for them, which he appreciates after one too many times having them walk in on he and Emma.
“Hi,” he greets, opening the door and ushering them inside. “Emma’s still asleep, but I’m sure she’ll wake up soon. Do you guys want some breakfast?”
“We ate at home, sweetie,” Mary Margaret greets, giving him a quick hug before David does the same. “So Emma said you guys were having some issues in the nursery.”
“I believe that it was more like Killian not being able to put together a crib in under three weeks.”
“So funny, Dave,” he bites, rolling his eyes and locking the door. “I did eventually figure it out. I just think this mid-July heat is obviously getting to me. Or maybe nerves. I’m not too sure.”
“Well, let’s go help then. We’ve got to be at the pub at two, but I think we should be able to get things done.”
After he fixes himself some coffee, not nearly as wide awake as David and Mary Margaret, they head upstairs and begin working in the nursery, assembling the shelves and drilling them into the walls in half the time that it would have taken he and Emma had they done this by themselves. So maybe help isn’t all bad. Before Emma even wakes up, they have the shelves installed and pictures securely nailed on the wall. There are books already being stacked, stuffed animals and knick knacks being placed, and all of the fun nipple creams and breast pumps being placed in the cabinet.
They’re working on the glider when Emma finally wanders in, her hair falling out of its band so that half of it spills down her back while the other half is piled on top of her head, and she’s got her glasses on, something she only does when her eyes feel too puffy to put her contacts in.
“Hey, sweetheart,” David greets, finishing tightening the screw he’s working on before getting up to embrace Emma. “How are you feeling?”
“Rough today. I think the little dude’s a giant or something because he crushes my lungs and my bladder at the same time. So I can’t breathe, and I have to pee. So, yeah, it’s fun.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Thanks, dad. It looks fantastic in here. You guys have done so much. I feel like we’re not going to have anything to do in the next two months if we finish all of this.”
“That’s kind of the point, love.”
“Yeah,” she yawns, covering her mouth, “I know. Mom, do you want to come and rest with me in my room? My back hurts today, and I just can’t sit on the floor in here with you guys.” “Of course, hon,” Mary Margaret answers, walking away from the closet and stepping over to Emma before she rubs up and down her back. “Are you sure you don’t want Killian to join you? David and I would be fine to work on our own.”
“No, it’s fine. I bug him all day, and I’m kind of thinking that you can paint my toes for me or we can watch movies or something. It’s been awhile since we’ve done that.”
“Text me if you need me, love,” he tells Emma, his eyes tracing over her in a bit of concern. It’s difficult watching her be uncomfortable or miserable on some days when he literally can’t do anything about it.
“Yeah, babe, I will.”
Emma and Mary Margaret walk out of the room, their voices fading away as they walk into their bedroom one room over, and he’s left with just David who promptly gets back to work finishing building the chair. Music plays in the background, an eighties’ playlist he thinks, and it doesn’t take longer before the chair is completely together and he’s sitting in it testing it out. It’s comfortable, probably one of the best seats they have in the house, and he can definitely understand why Emma insisted on this one after shopping around a bit.
“How does someone so small have so much stuff?”
“My child is twenty-eight years old, we don’t even live in her childhood home anymore, and I swear things of hers still pop up all of the time.”
“That’s likely because Emma leaves everything all over the place.”
He folds his hands behind his head, closing his eyes and rocking back and forth while Cherry Bomb plays in the background, which is definitely not a nursery appropriate song. Or maybe it is. Who needs Mozart when you can have The Runaways?
“So is Emma like that every day?”
“Like what?” he asks, popping an eye open to look at David who’s sitting against the shelves, which can’t be good for his back. God, how old is he getting if his first concern is for someone else’s back?
“Exhausted.”
“No, not every day. She’s usually got a hell of a lot of energy, even if there’s always a nap. I think she had a restless night. She’ll tell me like it is, though. If she’s having a bad day, she’ll let us know.” “What about you?”
“Well, I don’t have a baby crushing my lungs and my bladder.”
“True,” David laughs, running his hands through his short hair. Killian swears it’s gotten more gray in the past year, the blonde nearly disappearing. David is only fifty-two, so he’s not exactly older. Hell, if it weren’t for the wrinkles on his forehead and the gray hairs outnumbering the blonde, he’d look much younger. “But I remember being a dad for the first time. It’s terrifying, so you’re allowed to be scared.”
“I am. It’s…” He reaches up and scratches behind his ear, his hair getting long enough that he knows he needs to get a haircut soon. “Emma and I try to make sure that we keep up our normal routines, that we have our normal conversations without talking too much about the baby, but it’s kind of hard, you know? It’s like we’ll be talking about going out to eat and two minutes later we’re making a list of middle names or speculating if he’s going to look more like me or Emma.”
“I know. But it’s an exciting time, Killian. There will never be anything like it, and if you want to talk about the fact that you’re having a kid, you should. You and Emma have been together for so long, and I really don’t think your relationship is going to struggle if you’re not sitting around making references no one else understands for hours on end.”
“Oi,” he protests, resisting the urge to pick up the toy elephant next to him and throw it at David, “that is your daughter you’re mocking, and she can still kick your ass.”
“Trust me, I know. Who do you think raised her to be like that?”
“Mary Margaret.”
“You’re walking a thin line.”
He winks at David, his lips ticking up on the right into a smirk. “I know. You and Mary Margaret did such a good job, still do such a good job, and even with all of the times you’ve messed up – ”
“ – which is a lot more often than even Emma has probably told you.”
“I just…you’re a good dad, Dave. To Emma, to me. I hope I can do half as good as a job.”
“You’ll be great, Killian.” David smiles at him, something genuine, and Killian’s reminded of how much David really has impacted his life in all of the best ways. “I promise. And as much as I love you, I do love my little girl more, and she’s going to be amazing. She’s always…she’s never been too open to a lot of people, but the people she loves, she loves so fiercely, you know? And she’s already doing so well at being a mom. She’ll call me at nights, and I can just hear the happiness and excitement in her voice. At the end of the day, that’s all you want, you know? For your kid to be healthy and happy.”
“Yeah, I know.” He smiles to himself, thinking of how happy he is. “Also, how dare you imply that you love your own daughter more than me. I thought I meant more to you than that. I thought we had something special, man.”
“I can still give you hell. I’d watch yourself.”
He and David finish up in the nursery for the next few hours until David and Mary Margaret have to go to work, leaving after the three of them eat lunch down in the kitchen, Emma staying upstairs for a nap. When the Nolans are gone and he’s finished eating, he heads upstairs, bypassing the nursery and walking into their bedroom where Emma is sitting up on the bed watching TV.
“Your toes look nice,” he compliments, grabbing onto her big toe and moving it back and forth. “Do you feel any better?”
“Yeah,” she sighs, twisting onto her back and scooting up the bed, “it’s just one of those days, you know? I’m not usually this miserable.”
“I know, but it’s okay to have bad days, love.”
“Come here,” she tells him, crooking her fingers and motioning toward him before she turns on her side and wraps her arms around her pillow. He does as she asks, kicking off his sneakers and crawling up into the bed, the mattress moving against his weight until he’s pressed up behind her, his knee stuck between her thighs and his arm wrapped around her waist while the other rests above her head. This is how she’s been comfortable lately, and he can’t say he minds. “Did you guys get a lot done?”
“Aye, it’s almost all finished.” He moves her hair off of her neck, placing a kiss there before resting his chin on her shoulder. “It just needs your finishing touches, I think.”
“And we have to unpack all of the boxes that are in the guest room and put them away in the closet.” “That too, but we’ve got time, Emma.” She hums, and he can feel the vibrations as well as Andy moving around under his touch, the movements following how he taps his fingers. “Has he been active today?”
“Not since I woke up, but he always responds to your voice.” “Yeah, he recognizes me?”
“Of course, you talk so damn much. How could he not?”
He turns his head and presses a kiss against her jaw, biting a bit just to tease her. “You are not a very nice woman, my love.”
“Oh please, I’m, like, the seventh nicest person you know.”
“Seventh?”
“I figured it was conceited to put me at number one.”
“Possibly.” He moves his hand against her stomach again, snaking his fingers up under her pajama top so that he can feel the warmth of her skin. “So he really does get more active when I talk?”
“Yeah, it’s pretty weird to think about, but it’s true. He likes when you talk. I think it’s because you’re a much better story teller than me.” “I mean, obviously.”
“And that he’s probably just glad to hear someone else besides me. Imagine being stuck with someone for nine months. Good God.”
“Well, I’m stuck with you for forever. Good God.”
She groans and curses him under his breath before she scoots over and turns in his arms, slowly but surely moving to face him. “Don’t be an asshole. Also, so I was talking to mom today, and she wants to be called Mimi. I think Dad wants to be called Papa, which I like as long as that’s not what you want. I know that’s what some kids call their dads.”
“Aye, it’s what Lizzie calls Liam, which is weird since Alex doesn’t do that. But I’m okay with dad or daddy, so David can be called Papa.”
“Yeah, I kind of like it. Mimi and Papa. And then your parents are Gammy and Grandpa, right? That’s what Alex and Lizzie call them.”
“Aye, but I know Mom didn’t want to be Gammy. It’s just what happened. She says it makes her feel old.”
“Your mom is not old.”
“I know, but considering your parents are barely fifty while my parents are in their sixties and seventies, it doesn’t help.”
“I’ll tell my parents to get older then.”
He smiles at her before closing his eyes and settling into his pillow, letting his head sink down into the softness. It’s calming in here, the lights turned off and curtains closed while the ceiling fan hums a steady rhythm above them. He could fall asleep like this even if he’s not the biggest fan of naps, always somehow ending up groggy when he wakes up, and it doesn’t help with the way that Emma is playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, her fingers scratching into his scalp.
“Are you working tomorrow?”
He pops an eye open, looking at Emma and smiling when her nail hits a particularly sensitive spot on his neck. “Aye, I’ve got the Investiture ceremony at ten. Why?”
“Just wondering. I was thinking we could go somewhere. Just us. Maybe take Indy to Berkshire and let her run around, spend some time outside.” “We can do it in the afternoon, if you want. I think the weather is supposed to be nice.”
“Yeah,” she sighs, leaning forward and sliding her lips over his for a brief moment, “I think that would be nice.”
The next day after he’s finished with the ceremony, he hurries home, changing out of his suit and into shorts and a t-shirt, slipping a baseball cap onto his head and grabbing something to eat for lunch while Emma does the same, her hair falling out of the back of her hat in a long ponytail. They’ve got all day, but the afternoon’s weather is pleasant enough that he’d like to go now so they can stop by a café for dinner, even if that’s the absolute last thing that Thomas will want them to do.
They want their privacy, but they should be able to go out to dinner.
So he and Emma load up into his car, letting Indy sit in the backseat with the window rolled down so she can feel the mid-July breeze blow through her fur. It doesn’t take long to get to Windsor, pulling into their parking garage less than thirty minutes later, and instead of going inside like they’d usually do, he hooks Indy up to her leash while Emma grabs some water bottles and they head to the private gardens, avoiding the visitors wandering around on tours.
As much as he prefers the spring, mild July days are near the top of his list of favorite things. Everything is brighter, more pleasant. The grass is actually greener, the flowers contrasting against their background to create a landscape of whites and shades of purple, while everything is covered in a clear blue sky, only a few white clouds scattered throughout. New life blooms, and he gets to be the one to appreciate it, to revel in it. England can be so dreary sometimes, the weather somehow reflecting the moods of most people on their morning commute to work, so he appreciates when it’s not. He’s always loved the outdoors, and if there’s any complaint he has about his home, it’s the small private garden that they have to themselves. He’d like something larger, more space to run around, and sometime in the future, he and Emma plan to spend more time in Bucklebury so that they have the privacy.
That’s what they’ve decided on since returning from Spain last month. There’s been more lengthy, draining discussions with his parents and their security team than he’s ever wanted, and as much as he feels like they haven’t really accomplished anything, he knows it’s a slow process. Of course, there are drawbacks to every positive. They’re still going to have to spend most of their time at Kensington. It’s closer to their work, to their families. Hell, Emma’s parents just bought a house so that they could have the ability to spend time with their grandchild, and now they’re going to move away from them. It’s less than an hour drive, but it’s not nearly as close as they currently are.
But everyone understands, and they don’t plan on moving any time soon, not until Andy’s a bit older. They want to be near all of their loved ones when he’s younger, and they’ve spent so much time working on their home, making it exactly how they want. It’d be difficult to leave full time, so it’ll be nice to have the option of both.
It’ll be even nicer to give Andy the most normal life that they can possibly give him.
Emma whistles next to him, her fingers between her lips, while Indy runs back to them from where they let her loose. She was about five seconds away from jumping into a pond full of fish, and as much as they’d usually let her swim, they don’t need to have a wet dog with them for the rest of the day. So she runs back to them as quickly as she can, her legs leaping in the air with her black and white fur bouncing the slightest bit. He’s convinced that she shouldn’t be able to be that quick, but she’s still just a young dog, less than a year old, and though her legs will get longer, he doesn’t think she’ll ever be full of this much energy again.
If she is, he and Emma are definitely in over their heads.
With the dog.
He’s going to choose to not think of what it’ll be like with a toddler than can run and a dog that he can run after.
After she calms from her almost pond dive, Indy walks along in front of the two of them, occasionally wandering off the stone path to sniff around in the plants, nearly tearing up several flowers until they call her back to keep walking. They stay wandering for a little over two hours, not caring where exactly they’re going or if they’re circling back around in the same spots. Indy and Emma get tired around the same time, so they settle down onto a stone bench with a patio cover that’s next to another small pond.
In the distance, he can see the Chapel where they were married, the steeple rising up above the other buildings and stone walls, and he smiles to himself thinking of that day. In the grand scheme of things, he knows that when it comes to he and Emma, as important as it was, they had so many smaller, inconsequential days that he holds just as fondly in his heart.
But that was a pretty damn good day.
He stretches his arm out over the back of the bench, wrapping it around Emma’s shoulder and tangling his fingers into the ends of her ponytail while she leans her head on his shoulder, the bill of her hat hitting him in the chin for a brief moment. He’s glad she suggested them getting away from London for a little bit, for suggesting that they change up the routine and spend a day enjoying summer, especially since they’re missing out on Scotland with the rest of the family.
A month in the same place as everyone is likely a bit long, anyways. He loves his family, but that’s a lot for anyone.
“I love you, you know?” Emma asks out of nowhere, her gaze never falling away from the rippling of the water in front of them, a fish leaping up out of the water while the lily pads float around.
He squeezes her shoulder, rubbing up and down her arm and kissing her head even if she can’t feel it through the hat. “I know. I love you too.”
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detectivehole · 5 years
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Go comic feral, i followed this blog for a rEASOn and it's bc i like to hear your random vents and rants and also you reblog cool stuff. But i digress, go comic feral i am hERE for it
fine
PETER PARKER BEING RICH IS STUPID  he didnt even ern what he has himself it was nt even himn he wasnt in his body maybe if i had got to see him start fron nothing to being a cool ceo or whatever id be able to stand it but nooooooo he just GOT is for nothing so it feels stupid like “ha ha what if like tony stark haha” its DUMB and i haven’t read a spider man comic for a long time
deadpool/spiderman crossover comic bad. feels out of character a lot. funny concept and full of funny jokes but as far as characterization its bad in my opinion- was made to capitalize off the hype of the ship and we all know it
don cates should be banned from writing comics bc he fucking sucks and ill never forgive him for what he did/tried to do to venom
deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good dea
the venom movie was a lot of fun but it was very ooc a lot HOWEVER seeing some of the cut scenes and scripts you can see that it used to be actually fairly in character for the comics but a lot of scenes with eddie establishing himself as not actually the most nicest of guys (not that eddie isnt a nice guy deep down but he is a good amount fucked up with a big ol hero complex and a problem with ‘i can do no wrong” mentality sometimes) were cut and considering how the fandom for the movie treats him i can see why the cut those bits out bc i dont think movie goers would have liked him as much wich is a shame bc he is a good guy at the end of the day just fucked up
straight white male comic fans are the worst people in the world and breaking their fingers is a daydream i indulge in 
matt murdock is a himbo
foggy nelson is a good man who deserves better friends
i can tell what deadpool comics someone has read based on how they characterize wade in their fan works and i have a 80% success rate with it. the most common was the daniel way run but now its the spider-man/deadpool crossover series
soulda used miles for the mcu spidey instead of cannibalizing his story for parts like they did. dick move, Disney
mcu bad
i think just the idea of dc’s Red Tool is fucking hilarious but i dont like his character at all
batman and superman should fuck but they wont :/
matt and foggy should to but the comic industry is afraid of making long running characters lgbt bc theyre WEAK
deadpool need a canon bf they cant keep telling us hes pan and not showing us for reals- hell he could just go on one date or be shown having a one night stand or something- something beyond a damn joke
cable gay. no i will not listen to any other opinions.
im excited to read moon knight i have a book waiting i just have to finish my current one
SCUD the disposable assassin is the most underrated comic EVER and i LOVE IT however i think it ended stupid and bad however it went on fucking hiatus for like a decade and then was rapped up really fast so any ending is a godsend
i desperately want a long-form stand alone series abt wanda wilson bc shes the perfect foil for a good Feral Dumbass Woman comic. think abt it; shell sell immediately bc of recognizable brand, and then she can just go on violent stupid adventures without any of the other dp corps. it doenst have to line up with any canon i just want insane lady dp adventure comic. this is an unreasonable dream but mine none the less
i though that agent venom was stupid
tank girl is fucking amazing and i love it i never understand whats going on and i enjoy the confusion
reading early hulk comics feels like watching a weird, poorly produced old black and white sci-fi soap
there needs to be better, more easily accessed, official reading-order guides published and posted on the walls of comic shops everywhere
the 80s and 90s were the best time for marvel comics and no one can tell me otherwise. that was peak comic time
the worst time for comics was the 2000s and early 2010s
sometimes i am shocked by the art that gets the editors pass in comics. some of it is so bad and im not even talking about the disproportionate ladies
the lego marvel and dc movies are way better than the live action movies and im not even being sarcastic
seriously the 2000s made some horrible comics
i feel like committing acts of mass violence every time someone says comics arnt real reading/stories/implies theyre worth less of any value than a novel
i read the first deadpool comic i got so much that the art itself is so ingrained in my mind that people have shown my just the corners of panels and ive identified them correctly
i distinctly remember the first time the woman at the book store stopped asking me for parental permission to buy the comics i was getting (12yos) because i went there so often that she just remembered who i was and that the adult would say its fine
i refuse to talk about comics with people at cons because i am gatekept or flirted with every single time no matter what and there is no in between. and yea its because i have tits. youd think that eventually theyd learn but gross comic men never do and all the others have adopted the same policy as me so the closest i come to positive comic interaction at cons is standing in the same vicinity as another chick, looking at the same section, and the kinda smiling at each other
i think the avengers are boring. really really boring. the x-men are way better
i related to gwenpool too much when she first started and it scared/offended me so i stopped reading for a while until her character developed more and we stooped being so similar
i have spider-man bedding. i picked it out only a few months ago. its good it makes me feel cool in a very uncool way
watching spider-man as a kid made me wanna be a scientist. watching batman as a kid made me want to do martial arts. i ended up failing chemistry and falling on my face a lot instead.
i had a huge venom toy and a huge spiderman toy as a kid and while i did make them fight a lot i also made them hug just as much. i wanted them to be friends
on that note PETER IS MEAN TO THE SYMBIOTE NOW AND HE DONT EVEN HAVE A REASON NO MORE hes just such a dick about criminal reform eddie and the symbiote aint special with this- he says he believes people can be better but he really doesnt show it. he tends to think people are set in their ways and while this makes sense forthe most part considering how much hewas bullied as a kid/adult (that also contributes to his mild “i protect my own” mentality  tho at least he consciously fights that one) it stil pisses me off
i can think way more but i need to sleep i think
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dwightkschrute · 6 years
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In 2014 and 2015 I did a my year in review kind of thing where I, of course, reviewed it and accompanied it with a picture from that month. I somehow forgot to post 2016 (until now) and forgot to do it at all for 2017 but unfortunately, I am back with a really disappointing year. I was debating not putting myself through the legit pain of “reviewing” this year but I think of how I love going through my 2009-2010 posts and seeing how much I’ve grown so this is for you, successful and cooler future me.
2016 and 2017 were amazing but 2018 was my most promising year. My boyfriend and I were going to move in, I was going to start my dream job; everything was perfect. It definitely started out as one of the best years of my life! Then exactly halfway through the year everything changed and I was left having to pick up the pieces and completely restart, making it one of the worst years of my life.
I started January in Mexico, which was the best, but my family and I got home early in the month. I had quit my job the month before so I dedicated the entirety of this month to job hunting. Our friend (my bf’s bff who became mine and my brother’s bff early on)’s dad got a boat so it was like we got a boat too because despite the cold, we lived on it. (My boyfriend couldn’t go on the trip with us, which he was super bummed about (and that we had to spend like 10 days apart which was killer then), so he was the one to pick us up at the airport and he greeted me with a bouquet of flowers. Out of the many gifts/gestures he gave me, that was one of my favorites.)
February I started my amazing new job so life was back to 40 hour work weeks and not having much time for much else. I was always attached to the hip to my bf so almost every day after work entailed going out with him or having dinner with my family or his. That was my month. My favorite part of every February is Valentine’s Day and this one was as amazing as the rest. I don’t even have enough space (of the allotted space I give myself for each entry at least!) to describe that day. (My bf at our Valentine’s Day dinner. We finished our long day at this restaurant (so, so cool, once popular with Old Hollywood stars) on Hollywood Blvd and it was dreamy and romantic and amazing.) Oh man, I don’t have a lot of interesting things to say about March. Oh, my parents got Influenza (A/B/idk tbh), so it was two weeks of my brother, bf, and I taking care of them. My dad has a serious chronic disease so it was especially dangerous for him so it was a stressful time. Once we weren’t in hazmat suits anymore (no but really, we were gloved and double masked around them and kept them quarantined), I’d be at work or with my bf. I also started to get close with a co-worker, who I quickly became close friends with! (My bf’s two huskies. I’ve just loved that picture since I took it! I’ve never been loved by a dog more than the one in the back of this pic. Not even by my own! He has a special place in my heart.)
April was barbecues at my house or my bf’s, trying every brewery and bar around, hikes, bike rides, beach visits, baseball games, boat rides, late night cooking and baking. It was lots and lots of love and happiness and I would give absolutely anything to go back to those days. (My brother and bf grilling on Easter. This was a familiar scene, I have so many pictures of this exact scenario, yet looking at it just now made me so emotional! Stop! They’re just grilling!) May was so exciting! Very first day I got a new car! I was so happy! It was long overdue because my finicky, expensive Volkswagen had to go and I’d fallen in love with the new Honda Civic (I’ll admit I have basic taste but I don’t care!) so I finally bit the bullet and did it. This month my bf and I, after a long time of “oh wouldn’t it be nice!”, bit the bullet as well and decided to finally get serious about finding a place together. So the apartment search started, but we soon realized our home, Orange County, was super expensive. My bf, in that “ha ha jk but I’m down if you are” way, suggested we pick up and move to Oregon and I immediately agreed. It just felt right and despite us being the most careful and non-spontaneous people ever, we decided to do it! So we began to research, look for apartments but most importantly, jobs. (My car the day I took it home!)
Uhhhhhh, well, June hurts to think about! We went to visit Portland, where we decided we’d want to live because that’s where the jobs were, on a quick trip since it was strictly “business.” Portland was everything I imagined and more. We loved it and I think we loved playing house in our airbnb more than anything about the city. Back in LAX we came to the easy conclusion that though we lived Portland, that’d require a lot and for our first time moving out we’d like to stay close to home and above anything else, we just wanted to live together as soon as possible. We immediately started to look for places in LA, we spent the month apartment hunting, and towards the end of it, decided on one we really liked, one he begged me to please say yes to so we can move in already. I was so, so, so happy this month but what made me happier was seeing my bf, I swear, even happier than me. I seriously felt unstoppable and was beyond excited for our future. (I had a lot of Portland pictures to choose from but my bf and I liked this one because it reminded us of Always Sunny for some reason.)
In July, everything changed. To start, I left my job. I thought, new chapter in my life, new job coming, I’ll live really far, I should leave now. So I did. My last day was an emotional day because I loved my job so much and every single person I worked with. That very same day, my bf and I broke up. For unrelated reasons to my last day, to our moving in, to our relationship, etc. We had an amazing, amazing relationship but he has a lot of demons and issues/insecurities he has to deal with and conquer, and though I was aware and was there for him and would continue to be by his side no matter what, he decided that this was a battle he had to handle by himself and I figure before he got into a more committed situation. It didn’t have to happen, though. I hadn’t talked about the specifics of the breakup on my blog so  sorry for changing the mood of the post, but yeah, July happened and it felt like my world stopped. Really regret quitting my job now, huh? I was hit by two huge losses and changes right at the same time.  (I took this on my friend’s boat 20 tequila shots in, drunk and sad as fuck. Not to get fake deep but how sad. Literally on a boat, beautiful sunset, would rather die.)
August was a blur and I’m still not convinced I didn’t just dream it. God, alright, here we go, the rest of the year is a mess so get ready. I fell into a deep depression fast. It also didn’t help that my dad had to start getting radiation/infusions for his illness shortly after the breakup. I couldn’t believe how much my life had changed. I started dating someone else and then I dated another guy shortly after. I wanted to replace and/or forget and I really thought that’d be the solution. I was miserable when I was with them. I took absolutely any opportunity to get really drunk or high, and the opportunity came often so I spent most of my days desperately trying to not feel anything. The only time I’d feel okay was when I was extremely high and I couldn’t even think. Since I had a lot of savings for my out of state move, I had a lot of money to blow, which I did. I realized I even liked the feeling of the temporary “high” of spending a lot and receiving the stuff. I’d hang out with any friend who offered (out of boredom? loneliness?) and even ended up on a mess of a Vegas trip. Worst month ever. Maybe. (Here’s a positive! I like that bathing suit and my tiddie looks so round!)
When September came I realized two months had passed and all I had done was be a huge depressed mess. I no joke forgot about work. I just straight up forgot. I started to look for a new job, which hurt me so bad because I had to face the fact that it wouldn’t be my Cool LA Dream Job anymore. I stopped dating. Most importantly, I completely stopped drinking and smoking because it’d almost always make me sadder but also it scared me that I had no self control nor did I care. I saw a whole lot of my close friends and they, along with my immediate family, kept me afloat this month because time felt like it was going so fast. I couldn’t believe that at a blink of an eye it was night again and then a new day. Time had no mercy for me, please let me hold on. (Me at a baseball game. Tbh I’m looking at this thinking, did this really happen?)
October started out nice because my best friend of years, who I unfortunately had a falling out with three years ago, reached out to me. I’ll always give her all of the credit for doing that. I can’t begin to explain what this meant to me. It was a nice, bright shine of light that managed to shine through the dark clouds. Having my best friend is exactly what I needed. I’m a big believer in the universe acting in mysterious ways and though I had grown disappointed in its little surprise for me lately, this was the kind I always appreciate. I spent a good part of that month with her, catching up and doing things just like we did back then. It was like nothing had changed. That’s all I remember about this month, and a super fun Halloween! That day was probably one of the best days in months. (My best friend Rylee and me the first time seeing each other in 3 years. We’ve had our blogs for 8-9 years so please follow her for quality content)
November was rough. I was frustrated because surely things should had been better by then. I was still feeling so low, I was going to job interviews to no avail, I “relapsed” and had a high/drunk off my ass on a boat messy moment.. To make matters worse, I accidentally drove up on a cement divider in a parking lot and my airbags deploy, which is so expensive to fix, so my car was out of commission for a month. Then I got so sick and I rarely ever get a small cold. I seriously felt like I was cursed, even the smallest thing felt like an insult towards me. The one good thing is that since July I had been forcing myself to go to the gym five times a week. My mom said exercising was the only thing that’d help her feel that sweet release of seretonin, endorphins, dopamine, and all that good stuff when she was depressed so, though I enjoyed going to the gym before, I did it just for that reason alone. It worked and as another result I got like pretty fucking fit. Revenge body, you’re one of the few good things in my life right now. (I literally had no idea what to choose so I said fine, here’s a pic of the scene of the crime. Whatever.)
In December I turned 26. Which I hate, naturally. I went to a million more job interviews. I’m seriously so embarrassed to admit that but whatever, it’s the truth. (I have a degree, experience, and an awesome cover letter..I’ll keep blaming the curse!) What kept me sane was that we had different family members visiting from the very beginning of the month. Playing with an energetic, adorable baby kept me distracted and happy. Having so much company around also distracted me (slightly, but it helped!) from the fact that the holidays and my birthday would be quite different now. I’m one of those annoying Christmas lovers, usually at least. This year everything just happened and I didn’t care. But I survived December! (I don’t care. This is the appropriate representation of 2018 and how I feel at the end of it.)
Jesus if you’ve read all of this.. I’m sorry you had to read about the mess of my year but really more like the mess that is ME. Yknow those like “people my age I went to HS with vs me” memes? I seriously went from being that bitch with a good paying job, brand new car, a serious, great relationship with a promising future together (Like. We would color coordinate outfits! LMAO. We would have dinners with both of our families together. We were obsessed with each other. You’d roll your eyes if you saw any of this. I can’t get over how perfect we were, it’s hilarious what happened to us.) and then at the blink of an eye I went to not having absolutely any of that, casually dating (something I’d NEVER done) anyone who resembled my ex and sadly and drunkenly puking off the side of a pier. Who is she? I don’t know, I got whiplash. (Queen of parentheses and side notes, I know. But another thing about me is... I’ve never been affected by people leaving my life. I’m used to it. I’ve never been anywhere as affected as I was when my ex and I broke up. This isn’t normal for me, my ENTJ/Capricorn ass doesn’t know what this feeling is.)
Please curse that has been put on me, release me. Whoever is attacking my voodoo doll, calm down! Please! I’ve gone through enough sadness and loss. If 2019 is even slightly as bad, I’m going to be like that pigeon I reblogged the other day that’s like “fuck this I’m just going to sit here.” I can’t even make a cute but corny, hopeful “hope 2019 is great!” comment. I’m literally begging you...pleading you... I don’t believe in karma but after all of this shit, I better have something much better in stock for me. “Good things are coming!” I fucking hope so. Like, I’ll be even more annoying right now and say that it’s not fair that I didn’t get to have the future I was about to have. I don’t care about any cliche you may have for me. One door closes, everything happens for a reason, God has a plan, etc. No. Why did all of this have to happen? What can be better than the future I was going to have? I felt so unlucky. It all feels like a nightmare and I’m just waiting to feel whole again. Oh shit I got really intense. I know I’ll get over it and life will be good again eventually but for now, I am still so mad. I would have never in a million years guessed this is how my 2018 would go. 
So fine, I’ve accepted things now, so now I’m impatient and say please prove me wrong, 2019. I’m THREATENING you to be amazing!
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Characters I kin despite having little-to-no knowledge of them/knowing the folklore history etc that theyre based off of but nothing about their fandom canon:
Danny Phantom (i somehow instinctually know wayyyy too much abt how ghosts work in that canon for someone who. has seen maybe 5 minutes of an episode once) 
James Kirk from Star Trek
Firestar WarriorCats (i read the first two series and stopped not even halfway through Power Of Three, i was 9 years old, i don’t know what firestar’s been doing in the 80whatever books since or why im kinning him now, i didnt kin him or even like him when i was 9) 
Scourge Warriorcats (see above)
Jack Sparrow (ik like. a tiny bit of historical context. im not even in the OFMD fandom)
Geralt Of Rivia (Ik just enough abt this series to know that im so much more like Jaskier. and yet.)
Loki from the MCU (i know so much abt norse mythology. myth Loki fascinates me. i have no idea what the MCU is doing but i dont like it and i kin anyway)
Dipper Pines (yeah ive seen a good few clips but lbr i do NOT know)
L Whoever From Death Note Or Some Shit
That Metalhead Guy From Stranger Things Whose Name I Keep Forgetting. Loud Pretty.
David Bowie in Labyrinth (i watched this movie once in like 3rd grade and promptly forgot abt it for YEARS)
Basil Of Baker Street. yes the cartoon mouse sherlock holmes.... i think I’d kin Sherlock but i hate beandick cucumbers soooo much lmaooooo (oh yeah, and ive never seen Basil Of Baker Street) 
the other guy in stranger things who is a little older and has a mullet (but i kin metalhead guy more)
Cordell’s brother from Walker Texas Ranger (i saw a one minute clip of him, and i can tell they tried to write a “leftist” and oh my god i just wanna kin him so bad so that i can make him Worse. blue hair and a homestuck rp blog and nightcore and setting his brother’s cop car on fire. i want him to be a shitty manic panic blur of incomprehensibility to everyone who writes, directs and acts that show. you want a leftist character? then COMMIT TO IT) 
At least two separate red-headed bishonen space pirate boys from 80s-90s anime who wear blue dusters. there are at least two. probably more. i cannot tell them apart and do not know anything about the things they are from. 
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fmdxjerome · 7 years
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*naomi pokes her head in after disappearing for the 600th time* bonjour 
family things where the reason i was so m.i.a. this past week. but i’m here now and i’m going to follow and unfollow people. update some things (like points, plots and tag lists) and head into ims. the good things. sorry i keep disappearing, it’s a weird time. i hope you all are doing good though. people who i have not talked to yet, i’m sorry i still haven’t introduced myself to you all. i’ll gradually work on this. people who i plotted with before, you know i’m gradually trying to get back to that too. i’m very out of the loop with everything.
though! working on some things. writing, photoshop, things, yeah.
but that aside i kinda wanted to take the space of this ooc post to elaborate on the headcanon i wrote yesterday? because? wow. uh. what the hell was that. i wont talk about the topics of the story itself so dont worry if they are triggering to you, i wont be mentioning anything in here.
i just. i started writing the headcanon because my inspiration for anything else was nil. i had things done for my starter (things that had to go out before it for the starter to make sense) and i was preparing to write but nothing came out. and i saw the days ticking by then so i thought “a headcanon will give me something to put out as i dont want to loose jerome but also don’t want to go on hiatus again”. i thought it’ll be like 1000 words and just explain seulgi and chanyeol a bit but it turned into that. i kinda got sucked into it. like, very badly. i wrote it in two days and two nights with little sleep and a lot of tears and it fucked me up but not in a bad way persay (not in a good way either but). after my hiatus i’ve been all kinds of weird with jerome? i haven’t known how to put him out there and advertise him as a cool dude to new and old people in here and i blame my mood for that? because when i was all meme kid 2000 it was easier to thrust him into people’s dm’s, but then after the hiatus i’ve been so goddamned serious about everything that even the funny posts i try to make dont make it to the blog because i think about them too much? (honestly. i have a backlog of memes guys.). then i write that, start writing that with the beginning and end in mind and it’s so goddamned dark but it gets my emotions out and makes me feel more intrigued to flesh out jerome. it relieves me a bit. 
because the thing about jerome is that family is one of the most important things for him. and exploring chanyeol, who had everything jerome had wanted when he grew up (to be raised by a mother who looked like him and loved him), made me find jerome again. it’s the comparing of lives that do it, how two brothers that came from the same prompt live such different lives because of the polarizing answers their mothers gave to one of the hardest question in life. but then again they have so much the same; the drinking, the faces, the laughs, the ridicule, and so much more. they’re more like twins than they are brothers, just years apart and not quite the same.
(there is a reason why *if you read the story* i pinned their situations against each other often, give the perspective of jerome’s life whilst giving context to chanyeols)
and i dont know if jerome will ever know about chanyeol, meet seulgi, find a connection with his mother, feel a bond with his sibling (who’s connection form is almost done, i’m hoping for a sister) or find the bad of himself in his father but it’s the start of exploring this part of jerome’s life, his bloodlines, that get me so much more into jerome’s story. because it is such an important piece in his life.
and look, you might think “but thats marie!” if you look over his blog or read his bio (please dont. its ugly.), that she’s the most influential thing in jerome’s character as she’s the one who basically created “yuddy”. and yeah, she’s important. he still gets anxious when she teeters with the information only they know and still gets furious when he sees her face. but it’s family that starts it all. 
he wouldn’t be as searching for warmth if it wasn’t for the fact that he views himself to be abandoned when just a baby, which his mother did with all the heart break in her heart. he wouldn’t be as proving and intense if it wasn’t for the fact that he feels like he has just one moment to cement himself in someone’s memory as something to desire (whether its about music, lust, love, etc.). he wouldn’t be as afraid of loosing important people in his life if he hadn’t lost the most important one of all.
also, he wouldn’t be as natural with the flirting and the charming smirks if it wasn’t for the fact that his father had that natural allure to him, too. had that bad treatment, too. had that booming confidence, too. and had that selfishness, too. (i villainize chanwook a lot. but he was just a guy who didn’t like commitments, he wants the fun and nothing else. hmm doesn’t that sound familiar.)
yuddy was a reaction to marie, but made possible because of chanwook. hey, thats pretty deep.
anyway, what also was interesting with exploring chanyeol was the fact that jerome’s biggest wish was to be able to look at someone and recognize himself in it. with his adoption family he obviously couldnt do that. and to add another layer in his hometown there were no korean faces, no ethnicity he could belong to. (i dont know how it is in legit laval and martigné-sur-mayenne as i am just a dumb kid who only has the internet to find things out BUT as i live in a western european town *obliviously naomi you’re dutch* thats pretty big and those towns arents the biggest i can use my own experiences and grab the data/information i can find on the internet to create young!jerome’s school and daily life environment.) but he could live with that if he just had a mother or/and a father he could look up to and see himself. there have been days where he’s been bullied for the shape of his eyes or the colour of his skin, there have been days where he’s been fetishized for them too, and if he was allowed to look up at his mother he could see the same pairs of eyes stare back at him. and if he’d look at his father he’d see the same coloured skin. he’d feel more at ease. but he sees blonde hair and peachy skin instead, sees hazel eyes and different noses. add a DEEPER layer and he can’t seem to find where he gets his ugly wide laugh from, or his aggression when provoked. the gentle touch to the things he loves. the intensity of passion. the greed of selfishness. he doesn’t know where the traits come from, who gives him those traits, or if they are purely his own. and he truly wished he did.
and with that as he stands on stage now he is unaware that he makes two women cry every night. blissfully unaware that he has two mothers look at him and see the man that left them but see their missed sons too. he knows nothing of that, and so he knows nothing of the impact he’s making with simply existing. (boram looking at jerome is still very ambiguous in my mind though as her kid can appear in roleplay but seulgi’s view is pretty cemented)
okay shit this kind of turned into some weird exploration of jerome? i started writing this like 6 hours ago what the hell. i’m so slow. maybe this is helping me too with making that re-introduction thing i still have to make. great. well what you can take from this is that jerome has a definite baseline when it comes to his personality and i explored that in chanyeols story where he was the one who got it yet felt undeserving of it?
it’s affection. his baseline is affection. his baseline is warmth. for him as a person, a real person, his person. and not for anything else. and it’s nice to look at the people that gave that to him, the people that didn’t and the reasons behind it.
his biological mother couldn’t give it to him because she gave him away before she could. (the only exception being the first moment in the hospital room 26 years ago.)
his biological father couldn’t give it to him seeing as he didn’t even care to know him.
his adoptive parents couldn’t give it to him as they only saw him as a prop next to jade vases and ricepaper fans.
his first love marie couldn’t give it to him even when he thought she could, but then in time he realized she never loved him for him. realized she never loved him at all.
his grandfather has given it to him, as he sang with him to old tunes and learned him how to cook. his grandmother did too before she fell away.
frederic and halit gave it to him, freddy when he cemented himself as his first closest friend and halit when he pulled him along and shared his family with him. they both gave him a home, and they both gave him the concept of best friends.
julien too gifts it to him now, as he has poked through the shields that is yuddy and has never stopped grasping at the heart that is jerome.
its interesting. it’s all interesting and i’m kind of content that i threw this headcanon out there? or wrote it. (even if not many people will probably read it because of the content matter or because its dumb long or other reasons) because its really a start for me to explore jerome other sides more, the other important things. with the marie story half way finished and her changing in severity in his life, it’ll be interesting to further explore the facet that hurt jerome the most. bloodlines.
ok i got to stop because literally no one is having time for my wall of mess i mean wall of text and its getting way too late/early whilst i wanted to reply to some dms so im just going to grab my phone and start typing there. until i fall asleep. which honestly can be in a few minutes as today was stressful (my cat couldnt poop and i cried lol i’m actually a mess.) 
ALSO if you read the story, the program seulgi watched when she saw jerome for the first time was You Hee-yeol's Sketchbook when DEAN was on. and the songs she heard where HALF MOON (D) and ORDINARY PEOPLE. (which are probably one of my favourite performances of dean.) easter egg. or something like that i dont know-
ok naomi out
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*uses a gif of my sweet winter child as i haven’t used one in ages*
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coolgirl · 7 years
Text
Fic recs masterpost
ok so i used to have a lot of fics masterposts on my old blog and people keep asking for recs + i wont be able to upddate them or anything anymore so i decided to just move them all to this blog
under the cut: AUS / arkham knight / jaykyle / jayroy / robin!jason / gen / angst fics 
*: last added (april 4) //   for some reason the links arent working so go to jasontodd.tumblr.com/ficrecs for the links, sorry!
AUS
The Virtue of Revenge | young justice au with jason as red x making his own team with roy, starfire, raven, and others. i love it, even if it has shaky moments and stuff pls give it a chance.
crystal silence creeping down | young justice/lost days au
Flicker from View | another young justice au
Live to Rise | yes. you guessed it. young justice au.
Collide &  Convergence | au where post crisis jason goes to the young justice universe
The Changeling Sequence | series where jason meets damian before he went to gotham. The last part is a wip that i doubt will ever get updated again, so uh be careful. read only the first or second part and forget about the third.
The Drag of Fate | au where jason is lady shiva’s son as well. Part of a series, which i also highly recommend but idk if they would be au as well
heavy on the heart | another jason and cass are bio siblings. A+.
Didymous | cass and jason are twins.
repairing the world | i dont know how to explain this series.. its an au and really really good. Jason doesn’t appear in all the pieces.
just go  | jayroy, wings au
In the Shadows (of Who We Used to Be) | jayroy, black widow & hawkeye au
The Family (or how Jason Todd was adopted by the Avengers) | marvel crossover
bad boys bad boys (whatcha gonna dooo) ♫ | jason is damian’s batman. iconic fic imo.
Rise (And Try Not to Fall) | star wars au
A Bird in Morning | bruce finds jason when he’s at the hospital after crawling out of his grave
Moment Between | ghost jason & ghost martha and thomas wayne
We’re not in Crime Alley Anymore | au where jason was younger when bruce took him (and he didnt become robin)
Perhaps The World Ends Here | marvel crossover, future jaykyle
Batten Down the Hatches | a few different aus here. young justice + helena wayne
My Brother's Keeper | jason & damian knew each other from before + damian arrives to gotham just for jason
When the Moon Found the Sun | main story is clark/bruce but it’s preetty cute. soulmates au.
Between the Light and the Dark* | damian & jason uuhm i cant remember what this one was about per se bc im reading like 5487 similar fics but yeah
Two Dead Birds  | time travel stuff
Red Blood, Blue Blood | jason (and the rest of the batkids) are bruce’s biological kids, yeah i wasnt a big fan of the premise at first either but its gud
Rebirth | talia & jason, mind the warnings
you belong among the wildflowers | kate n renee adopt jason instead of bruce
We're the warriors of tomorrow |  Cass, Jason and Damian meet while with the League of Shadows
Can You Hear Me?  | ghost jason
to death's other kingdom I will not go  | bruce makes it on time au
The Ties That Bind  |  The pit restores Jason's body but not his mind, Ra's makes him one of his assassins and Talia adopts him as her own.
death’s outlet song of life* | the gordons find jason before the events of lost days
reflections on shattered mirrors.* | talia & jason stuff
Come Alive* | young justice s3 based
A Path Upon The Ground* | au from lost days, eddie and jason meet again
ARKHAM VERSE
If He Had Come & the sequel  Desiderium | au where bruce rescued jason before he could become the arkham knight.
the roads we know
this gun needs no bullets
JASON & BRUCE CENTRIC (not romantic)
Quack | this one is so crackish but so so cute i love it, robin jason
If He Had Come & sequel Desiderium  | arkham knight verse and its so good and has a lot of bruce & jason feels
Neverland /  Keep Lying To Me | deaged/ little jason from another universe.. sad and cute
Icarus and Bubble Gum | fluff, robin jason
Knock On Death’s Door | bit of both but not so so so angst, red hood jason
dead and dying things | au
In Memoriam | angst, trying to fix their relationship, red hood jason
If the Fates Allow | angst, red hood jason
The D-Word | fluff kind of.. red hood jason
This Place We Built With Grace and Guilt | angst angst angst, red hood jason
I Love You | robin jason, fluff
Wayward Birds | fluff and angst, robin jason
yesterday’s gone, yeah it went away (i’ve been lost but i’m here today) | another trying to fix their relationship fic, its cute and sad
We’re not in Crime Alley Anymore | au where jason was younger when bruce took him (and he didnt become robin)
Little Absences | sad, robin & red hood
Schrödinger's Honest Man | sad, drugs tw, absolute fave
White Christmas | bruce & robin!jason
Frozen History | de-age
Stargazer | jason n bruce patching their relationship.. its iconic
Unconventional Family Reunions | bvs setting
Prompt: Trapped | mind the warnings
Safe In My Arms 
The Failures of Reverse Engineering  | ghhm not really bruce & jason maybe?
to death's other kingdom I will not go | bruce saves jason au
points of impact  | glass case get fucked
is it my fault? (we've been missing each other)*
waiting for you. *
The Little Things*
World's Finest* | my uwus my uwus have fallen everywhere
JAYKYLE (all iconic)
In Which Kyle Confesses The Same Thing Six Times
milk and honey
Batman vs Space Bureaucracy
deadlock
attention to detail
tempest in a teapot
violet tendencies
no love, no glory (no hero in his skies)
keep the door open for me
waffles and war 
The Art of Subtlety (jason lives au)
Perhaps The World Ends Here | marvel crossover, future jaykyle
Riding in Batcars with Boys
boy, you fill my lungs with sweetness
no chance, no way, i won't say it (no, no)  
a change in the atmosphere
invitation to commitment
Overexposed 
i deserve that, don't i, some sort of blazing love that i can live with 
i won't say 
The water is always warmest at dawn
JAYROY (all iconic too)
sleepless 
Countdown
just go (wings au)
Unspoken
(for thy love is) better than wine (E)
Rooftops
Dick Wolf is a Really Funny Name
A headache isn’t always a bad thing
sad eyes, bad guys, mouth full of white lies [high school au]
kairosclerosis 
The Night They Met 
march down an empty street (like a ship into the storm) *
Archange de la mort (rallume ton flambeau) * | hic warning lol
this time, the loser wins | steph & jason centric though
So Baby Come Light Me Up *
Little Talks *
All the light is never ending, much like you and I; *
Don't let me go, for I feel I may fall * | soulmates au
Something Reckless * 
OTHERS
how to make a home. * | some eddie/jason if you squint, rose/eddie/jason team up
This Car Ain't Big Enough For The Both Of Us* | could be read as jayconnor :3
Robin/young!Jason
The Art of Subtlety | jason lives au, jaykyle
Little Absences | sad, robin & red hood
I Love You | robin jason, fluff
Wayward Birds | fluff and angst, robin jason
Icarus and Bubble Gum | fluff, robin jason
Quack | this one is so crackish but so so cute i love it, robin jason
we were not tragedies | jason & babs, read warnings
Heavy Home | gen, alfred & jason
Good News (No One Mourns the Wicked) | Jason & steph & damian. harold they’re dead (kinda robin!jason??)
Love Yourself (So No One Has To) | good amazing au with some selina & jason (not really.. robin but it starts as robin!jason i guess?)
Moment Between | ghost jason & ghost martha and thomas wayne
We’re not in Crime Alley Anymore | au where jason was younger when bruce took him (and he didnt become robin)
Tired &  Laundry | kinda au, read tw!
Smoke | jason & jim gordon
White Christmas | bruce & robin!jason
is it my fault? (we've been missing each other)* | mix of present and past jason
Sidekick* 
waiting for you.* | technically baby jason
The Little Things*
World's Finest* | oh this one.. my uwus
GEN
hold on to what  we are, hold on to your heart | gen, Barbara & Jason friendship. Some dinahbabs & jayroy
gotta give the boy points | gen, absolute fave
Strangers in Nothing but Name | marvel crossover, side steve/bucky
If He Had Come |  Desiderium | Arkham Verse, gen
I can’t  think up a good  name for this | young justice verse, gen apart from canon relationships
A Better Thesis | gen, p short but i loved it
The  F-Word | gen, batboys being batboys
until i’m in my grave | gen, wip 
Robins United | gen, batkids bonding, except for cass, thats my only complaint
Free of Dogma | gen, canon divergence, marvel crossover w Jason & Bucky
bad boys bad boys (whatcha gonna dooo) ♫ | au where damian is jasons robin and not dick’s, obviously damian & jason brotp. 
Heavy Home | gen, alfred & jason
In the  Shadow of Two Gunmen | gen, Marvel crossover
Flicker from View | side Barbara/Dick, young justice verse
I Love You | gen, Bruce & Jason
how to  hide a stray resurrected superhero from your parents/parental figure | au, jason & tim friendship kinda
One For The Road | Jason/Roy/Koriand’r but its SO cute
Baby,  It’s Cold Outside | gen, Dick & Jason
The  (Family) Doctor’s  Appointment | gen, batboys bonding
The Family (or how Jason Todd was adopted by the Avengers) | marvel crossover, gen
Reason | wip, gen, canon divergence
Soliloquy | gen, tim & Jason brotp,  and really cute batfam moments
Red As The Shadow Of Death | gen, young justice/under the red hood verse
Give Yourself a Chance | gen, duke & Jason & leslie brotpish
homecoming | outlaws brotp fic, could be considered shippy if you want to
And I Said What About Breakfast at Tiffany’s | jason & steph
Of Bats and the Forsaken | jason & all the batkids, side steph/cass and jay/roy if you squint
this is a long drive (for three robins who don’t agree on much) | no capes au, steph & jason & damian, background tim/tam
The Dying of the Light | marvel crossover, bucky & jason, canon divergence
Cat | selina &  jason, catlad au
Killing for Love | cass & jason, au  where jason was lady shivas son  
Keep Lying To Me | de-aged au, just heartbreaking imo, cursed fic
The Social Habits of Robin | gen, batboys. Where_is_cass.jpg tho
Steph and Jay’s Excellent Adventures | series, Steph & Jason
Neverland | jason & batkids, young!jay travels to the future. sad asad sad
on a thin chain of moments and something like faith | gen, jason & cass & steph mostly. really good
Good News (No One Mourns the Wicked) | Jason & steph & damian. harold they’re dead
In a Parallel Life | batboys focused, it has amazing dialogue, dynamics, and characterization. It’s only missing Cass and the rest of the girls.
repairing the world | series, not everything is about the batfam.
Born to Run (Born to Rise) | Jason & Talia having a mother/son relationship reblog if you agree
Live to Rise | it updated again p recently so yay! young justice verse
To Save a Dying City  | jason + other people
Let’s Have Some Fun This Beat Is Sick | mostly damian centric
Movie Night: The Mummy  | read trigger warnings, batboys
The Trading Chain  | not jason centric, but it has cass being older than jason and calling him “little brother” so noice
we sure know how to run free  | jason & cass
Yesterday’s Voices | bruce loses his memory au
Nests and Cages series | read trigger warnings
Roots | barbara centric, really good plot and characterization
Love Yourself (So No One Has To) | good amazing au with selina & jason
Retrograde Motion | de aged jason au
Provenance | mostly roy centric, bruce fucks oliver’s life for what he did to roy. iconic
Schrödinger's Honest Man | sad, drugs tw, absolute fave 
Batten Down the Hatches | a few different aus here. young justice + helena wayne
My Brother's Keeper | jason & damian knew each other from before + damian arrives to gotham just for jason
White Christmas | bruce & robin!jason
until i'm in my grave v2 | this one is already mentioned in this post BUUUT the writer started rewriting it so!
Frozen History | de-age
Stargazer | jason n bruce patching their relationship.. its iconic
show me yesterday, for i can’t find today | time travel au
Warm Enough | alfred & jay fluff
Parallels | mia & jason team up
Legacy | reverse robins, not jason centric but hes there alright.. i think.. i cant remember :D
What are the words I'm forbidden to say?* | damian & jay fluff
Cracked Foundation| jason n damian
Cat's Cradle  | more jason n damian
spaces in between  | damian & jason again
When the lights go out  | damian & jason, theres a pattern here
in my head, i do everything right | some jason & steph
is it my fault? (we've been missing each other)* | past & future jason
life, if well lived* | jason travels back in time and meets martha & thomas wayne
In Charge * | babie jason
Pyrrhic victory* | jason & damian stuff
Twists and Turns* | more jason & damian bonding
Of Brothers and Batcows* | guess what.. yes! more jason & damian
This Car Ain't Big Enough For The Both Of Us* | jason & connor.. say no more!
First Gear* | back to jason & damian please read this.. damian tries to teach jason to drive
changing, falling, fading (please watch over me)* | jason bonds with damian & steph
ANGST
Through the Valley of the Shadow of Death [read the trigger warnings!!]
in the repairing the world series there are a lot of fics dealing with jason, tho Warm Enough ugh not all are centered around him. I would say read  Escalation | Coup de Grâce |  Interlude for the rh!jason arc, and  Tired &  Laundry for robin!jason. [also read trigger warnings]
Countdown | jason/roy]
those six days [trigger warnings again!!!]
Call | angst
the tune without the words  | kind of character study from jim gordon’s pov
Unspoken | jason/roy, really angsty if you remember how red hood arsenal ended
If He Had Come & Desiderium | arkham knight verse, read trigger warnings!
Reason | on hiatus :/
hold on to what we are, hold on to your heart   | this is my favorite ever.. read trigger warnings
Heavy Home | alfred & jason
until i’m in my grave [trigger warnings!]
Keeping Broken Pieces Together
Monsters | marvel crossover
gotta give the boy points | this one please!!!! another fav. read trigger warnings
The weight of it [trigger warnings!]
Live to Rise | young justice verse
Neverland | THIS ONE IS PURE ANGST!!! please its so sad..
Keep Lying To Me | this one has some angsty scenes too im sad emoji
hangman is coming down from the gallows  | some angst
Movie Night: The Mummy  | read trigger warnings, batboys
Love Yourself (So No One Has To)
All in the Blood [read trigger warnings]
Little Absences
Stargazer | jason n bruce patching their relationship.. its iconic
Rebirth * | mind the warnings and its really. sad.
The Failures of Reverse Engineering *
Eternal Soliloquy * | sad sad
throw me a lifeline (I might even catch it) *
changing, falling, fading (please watch over me) * | jason & steph & dami angst
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mariaaamaaarquez · 5 years
Text
mirrors
hi! happy monday! well tbh not so happy Jesus, I hate Mondays. I also hate how fast time is going by like um hi its Virgo season?! for all my zodiac people who are into that stuff ive been so invested in it recently and its kinda scaryyy how accurate my shit has been. BUT ANYWAYS times flying by and its almost September meaning college move in day is closer, AAAND im almost eighteen FINALLY. 
finna go craaaazyyyy ;) 
anyways today’s post we’re gonna go a little back in time, and talk about something I feel like I used to struggle with soooo much throughout middle school and my first two years of high school which was looking in the mirror.
horrible.
as a sixth grader, thats kind of when my body started changinggg, my friends started becoming- weird, problems at home were just constantly popping up because I kept acting out- all in all, middle school? low-key worst years of my LIIIFE. 
self acceptance is something I feel like we all have to work on at some point, right? there’d be times when I would just look at myself in the mirror and genuinely just hated everything I saw. I hated everything about it. 
(which is honestly so funny now because one, I used to be a BITCH and two, it was my personality that was ugly, not me- well jk I was kinda ugly lmao YIKES)
anyways, it got to the point where when I started losing friends, I thought it was because of the way I looked, or acted. (mind you I was more of a bitch to people I didn't know, I tried to be nice to my “friends” LMAOO) but in all honesty like if im just trying to be real- I genuinely just thought I was ugly and I was just so insecure in general and it got to my head. I would look at my friends at the time and id be like damn like im nothing compared to them- ya know? 
I know its so sad to look back on it now that im genuinely thinking about it.
it wasn't until my junior year that I actually became more confident with myself, and my body. I thought that it was because now I had an ass and I had tits and in that time I thought and was under the impression that that was all that mattered.
plot twist: it wasn’t.
my junior year was the first year I began to reconnect with old friendships again. I had lost so many friends and my junior year I was committed to trying to fix lots of open wounds and find the closure I needed. 
mirrors used to be my biggest fear, because of the fact that when I looked in any mirror, all of the insecurities just made their way out and it was as if the words would just appear on the mirror itself.
(lmao kind of like when people write on their mirrors with lipstick or some heartbreak shit like that LOLLL)
okay anyways but seriously like-it was bad.
It even got to a point where I was scared I was going to fall into an eating disorder because of how much I hated how I looked. junior year, helped in the sense that I started dressing better FIRST OFF. & second off, I was trying- but not too hard. and also a big thing was that I began to surround myself with people that made me feel more confident. people that were genuine and real about how they felt about me. 
it was the push I needed to just boost myself up a little bit. 
I came fully to my senses senior year. senior year was genuinely so good to me even with its bullshit parts (because of course it had its bullshit parts) but I came to the realization that it wasn’t what was on the outside that I had to work on- it was everything on the inside. 
(no deadass all of my current friends I have at the moment either hated me at some point or just thought I was a straight up BITCH.) 
it wasn't until I became closer to more people, that I finally came to the realization that yeah the glow up helped- but it was mostly because I was tempted to grow as a person mentally, and emotionally. I became more selfless, more humble, and I cannot stress how much of a change that made in my life.
I no longer looked in the mirror and thought I was ugly.
I no longer looked in the mirror and felt insecure.
I was just- me.
its so weird looking back and seeing how unconfident I was and how insecure I was because if you ask anyone- I was one of the most outgoing people you could've met. I was in ASB, leadership, I dressed up for all the spirit days, and people knew who I was. 
that was all an act.
see my problem was, behind closed doors, behind the face of makeup, and the nice outfit, who really was I? 
was I just a person putting up a front so that people would like me? 
was I only able to act confident when I wasn’t alone?
yes yes and yes.
I wanted people to see the version of Maria that I always aspired to be. the version of myself where I felt confident and worthy and didn't need any reassurance or support from anybody. because the way I saw it at the time, was that 
as soon as you let someone in, you’re also giving them the opportunity to leave. 
and thats what I was afraid of. 
I was afraid of showing someone, anyone, how vulnerable I was at the time, because I always assumed they would leave and have everything I opened up to them about, with them, forever.
but you see, I soon came to realize that you will NEVER be okay with the person you are, until you let yourself be vulnerable. which is so fucking hard because I knowwww y'all know being vulnerable is so scary because you dont know what to expect from the person or the people. but when I finally understood, that it was okay to not be okay, well
everything got better from there.
I became the version of myself I always wanted to be.
the version of myself that I am now.
of course, im still working on a lot. a lot.
but, the difference now is that I managed to fully show my vulnerability and I let people in. is it still scary? always. the fear of losing people who ive been vulnerable with haunts my mind every single day. but we have to just say fuck it sometimes and take our risks because you never know why certain people cross paths with you. you never know what purpose each person is supposed to serve.
now, heres the lesson learned, and the takeaway I want you to have as this blog post comes to a close:
if you would've asked me to leave my house without makeup 4 years ago, id tell you that you were crazy. if you would've gave me a list of the people id be leaving high school with, and the people id be friends with in 2019, once again, id call you crazy. but what I learned from making my way through being as insecure as I was, was that I didn't feel pretty, because my personality was what was showing in the mirror. the version of me that only cared about putting up an act and hiding who I really was.
that was my mistake.
you should never be afraid to be yourself, you should never feel like you have to pretend to be okay just because you're scared of being vulnerable.
being vulnerable is what makes us human. 
being vulnerable is what makes us human.
being vulnerable is what makes us human.
being vulnerable is what makes us human.
the scars we have marked on our bodies, on our hearts, thats what makes us the people we are. dont run from it, embrace it! 
there is only one version of yourself in this entire universe (even though you probably do have someone who looks exactly like you in the world) nobody will have the exact same personality as you ever. 
I tried hiding my scars, I avoided being vulnerable, and it got me nowhere. it got me fake friends, problems, and a fat load of bullshit. 
and then I accepted myself as MYSELF, I opened up, I became vulnerable, and I can say now without a doubt, that I worked on myself and now looking in the mirror, is just a reminder of how much ive grown, and how much ive matured. 
and wow. does it feel pretty fucking nice to say that.
and thats all I have for you guys today! see you guys next post, and thanks for keeping up with me<3
besitos,
ria.
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co op car insurance
"co op car insurance
co op car insurance
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On average, does anyone know how much the 1st payment is? My parents are thinking it'd be around $2,000. And does $600 sound about right for subsequent payments?""
Buying a car and using a friends insurance to practice?
Can I buy a car and drive it with a provisional license with a friend who has a full license and insurance for their own car with me? I asking because I don't know how insurance works, but I know someone who has a full license, insurance and own car can let you drive it if you have a provisional license. I'm in the UK btw.""
Private health insurance plan needed?
I was layed off and need to enroll into a health insurance plan. My Cobra is going to be 700 just for me alone. I really need to have insurance but that's sooo expensive any hints or help is very much appreciated.
GMAC Auto Insurance Experience?
Anyone have GMAC auto insurance? If you do, please share your experience on how they apply discount and handle claims. I ask around for quotes online and the 2 insurance that gave me good quotes are Wawanesa and GMAC. Both seems to be good company but I would like to get some input from my fellow yahoo users. I currently have Allstate but their prices keeps going up instead of going down for all the discounts they put on my record ie. good driver, Home Owners, multiple policy and renewal. I ask the agent every renewal but they keep telling me that the insurance rate is going up in California which I doubt should happen every 6 months. Please no advertisement.""
Life insurance question.?
can your family collect it if someone commits suicide. for instance,when i shoot myself in the head and die,will my family get anything for it? honest answers only.""
When will the health care insurance take effect?
When does the doctor start charging more if you don't have health care insurance?
How can I get the best and competitive online insurance quotes?
How can I get the best and competitive online insurance quotes?
What kind of car insurance for a adapted van?
Ok I have a 1993 Dodge Caravan. I am disabled so it has a ramp that is let out and brought back in. It has disabled hand controls and a drivers seat that raises and lowers and turns around.. just a bit more than your average seat does now-a-days.. this van was adapted when it was made.. so i have no receipts on the modifications or anything.. i could get an estimate from a local store that deals in strictly handicapped equipment.. how do i properly insure this van? I need to make sure that if it is ever totaled that i dont get just blue book. since i have to have a adapted van (i live in a rural area and there is no dependable handicapped public transportation) i have the permanent general insurance now, with a $1000 on the custom equipment. but i worry thats not enough or maybe even doesnt cover my handicap adaptions. the agent with them was snappy, rude, and didnt know anything.. ugh! what company should i go to? what do i need to have in my policy? help! i keep getting all this bad advice from the insurance companies because no one knows what to do!!!""
Can i switch my health insurance policy -?
hello, i work for a small consulting firm , < 10 employees..on their w2. they provide me a group health insurance for my family (me ,wife and < 1yr old kid) and i pay around $900 every month without vision and dental coverage..all my contribution..and it is with united health care group now - with this new obamacare what options do i have 1. if i switch , will i get a cheaper coverage ? 2. what is that policy exchange ..i hear this a lot these days 3. if i had to switch my policy.who should i approach.. what would you advise for me..pleae advise me on getting a cheaper coverage""
""If Obamacare is so bad, why is reducing health insurance premiums by 50%?""
New York state residents will be able to get health insurance next year on the Obamacare exchange for half the average price available in the state today. http://money.cnn.com/2013/07/17/news/economy/obamacare-health-insurance-new-york/index.html Contrary to prior claims by conservatives, Obamacare lowers health insurance premiums in California http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2013/05/24/wonkbook-some-very-good-news-for-obamacare/ In fact, in the 9 states that published their 2014 rates, EVERY benchmark plan came in cheaper under Obamacare. http://thehill.com/blogs/healthwatch/health-reform-implementation/306515-obamacare-premiums-lower-than-expected#ixzz2ZQPqwUMT""
My mother added her car to my insurance policy without telling me?
i jus got a letter in the mail informing me of changes made to my insurance on my car, changes i didnt make and apparently my mother did, without telling me. what should i say to her?""
How much would insurance be for me?
Im 16 year old girl in Georgia. 2004 black Nissan 350z. How much do you think insurance will be monthly
Can a person get insurance on a car when the tag is in someones name?
can a person get insurance on a car if the tag is in someones elses name?
Who has the most affordable health coverage?
Who has the most affordable health coverage?
How much do you pay for full coverage?
I pay 375 for my car note a month and 250 for full coverage a month. Does this seem about right? I'm 20 and about 8 months ago I had gotten a ticket for something I didn't do and finally went to court and was proven not guilty. But I don't know if state farm insurance was high because of my age or because of the traffic ticket. Maybe both. Would I be able to get a cheaper price anywhere else. I'll be 21 in 6 months.
co op car insurance
co op car insurance
Does your license get suspended for not paying insurance?
Does your license get suspended for not paying insurance?
Can my father insure my car under his name?
I'm planing on financing a car and my father will Co sign. Can he put the car under his insurance I am only 18 years old so insurance just under my name is extremely expensive or is there a way he can be a Co owner of the vehicle if so how ?
What is the average cost of teenage car insurance in illinois?
I am a 16 year old girl. I am getting a car for christmas. We are looking for a Honda Civic or Honda Accord, probably around a year 2000 or so. I get good grades, mostly A's. I am a girl. I need to know pretty fast how much this is going to cost a month. Thanks.""
Car Insurance Liability?
Should I go around and get $2000000 in liability, or should I just go with $1000000?""
What do you do if you get in a car accident and the person who hits you doesn't have car insurance?
I was in a car accident a week ago, it was a 4 car pile-up the driver behind me did not pay attention to the red light and slammed into the back of me pushing me into another driver and then pushing him into someone else. The car that hit me did not have car insurance so I am going to have to pay my deductible of $500 also I had to pay for a rental car which cost me $100 (so far) I do have full coverage so I wont have to pay anything towards my car but I was wondering is it worth it to sure for the $600? What do most people do in this case?""
Why is my car insurance so high?
I have full coverage insurance on my 2005 Honda civic and I am paying a little over $850 every six months. Every quote I get isn't much better. Why is it so expensive? My insurance lady says that it's because I am a young driver with a newer car. But my YOUNGER sister has a car 2 years newer than mine and she pays about $350 less every six months. I have no tickets on my record. I did have my license suspended about 5 years ago. Why is it so expensive and how can I get it down? I can't afford this sh* t. Thank you!
So why is car insurance expensive for anyone under 25?
I can understand someone who has just gotten behind the wheel for the first time ever, but I have been driving for 2 years without even a traffic ticket on record, and my insurance is still near 2.5 grand a year. I don't drive a sporty car either, I drive a 2002 Accord. And I still have to wait 7 years for my insurance to go down to a reasonable rate? doesn't this sound a little ridiculous? And don't tell me that an accident is bound to happen or unavoidable for someone of my age. My dad got in his first car accident at age 35. My mom has yet to get in one (well, one that doesn't involve being rear ended). My girlfriend's oldest sister, who is now 27, hasn't gotten in an accident either. I think it is flawed that the insurance companies are simply assuming I am going to get in an accident instead of assessing what kind of a driver I really am.""
Can anyone help me shop for health insurance?
I am looking for health insurance and I can't decide between a regular insurance plan or a plan that includes health savings accounts. What is the difference between these two and which one is the best? I am on a tight budget.
How much is Auto Insurance in Italy?
Hi, im going to be moving to italy with my wife and child to stay there for four years so i will be purchasing a vehicle to get around with, im planning on a car but i want to find out a little more of how much it can cost for insurance on autos over there, both for cars and motorcycles, if its cheaper for motorcycle i will probably just get one car for my wife and get a motorcycle for myself. Any information will be helpful and thanks ahead of time""
Where can I find cheaper motorcycle insurance?
I need to get insurance today as I'm picking up my motorcycle later, it's a 1977 Honda CG125. The cheapest quote I have found is 377 TPFT, and that's with two years' NCB! Granted I'm still on a provisional licence but still ridiculous. Also, can anyone explain if there is any point at all forking out 150 more a year for Theft and Fire cover when it demands 500 excess? I'd have to pay that if it were stolen, right? Even though I paid less than that for the bike...""
Whom has the cheapest car insurance?
asking for my sister's boyfriend as his just went up very high in price and he is not too happy about it and looking for another ..thanks..
What reputable health insurance companies are out there?
What reputable health insurance companies are out there My mom doesn't have health insurance and my job doesn't give insurance to family members. I would like to pay monthly to a health insurance company so my mom could get health check up when she needs it. Do you know any health insurance companies that can accept low monthly payments since I don't get paid that much?
Is there anything I should be cautious about when getting car insurance?
Hi getting my 1st car insured. I keep hearing about things like windscreen protection etc etc. So far I think I will be going with either Diamond - or Endsliegh......? I there anything I should make sure I have. Im going for comprehensive. Thanks
Where do I find the group number on All kids family healthcare insurance card?
Hello, I'm filling out a student medical form for school, and it asks me for my insurance company's group number. I have All Kids healthcare insurance. Can anyone tell me where is it located?""
Auto Insurance Question?
Hi all, I live in California and I got in a car accident yesterday. I found out today that the insurance company suspended our insurance due to a late payment so we most likely had no coverage at the time of the accident. What are my options at this point?? The accident was not my fault and the other driver was arrested for felony DUI and they had insurance. What are my options?? Thanks in advance!""
Finding Health Insurance Plans?
I'm 25 and will be off my parents plan at the end of the month and with a history of preexisting conditions, it's hard to find any one that will accept me. We've been looking and calling and going through a insurance broker and no one will take me. Is there any company or health insurance plan that is less strict on new customers? What do I do?""
How much does motorcycle insurance cost in California?
Im 18 and i live in california, On average how much would insurace cost for me? . Also lets say i do get my license without purchasing a motorcycle, will my insurace rates still go down throughout the years even though i do not own or currently riding one?""
Whats the cheapest insurance company you could find?
I'm 18 years old, just passed my test, and the cheapest quote I could find is LV at 2600 on a 1.2 litre 06 reg corsa.. Help guys??? D:""
I wanted to know how comes my insurance is so cheap now but when i did it 7 moths ago it was 2800?
so 7 months ago i got my insurance third party fire and theft with 2 additional drivers me as first driver and i am 20 for 2800,, and now i checked with the same details i did last time i didnt put down any experience or anything did it same exactly as last time and its about 1950 now ??? wth did i get ripped off? car is a vuaxhall corsa 2000 model""
Teen insurance for cars/driving?
I'm not allowed to learn how to drive till I'm 18 but I was wondering about all the costs?Like how much a cheap car would be, how much insurance I'd need/cost, and how much is it to take driver's ed? If I left anything out, please tell me.Help?!""
How much will teen car insurance cost?
Okay so I'm getting my license soon. How much will my insurance be approx
What is the cost for home insurance based on?
I am thinking of buying properties in other states to use as rental income. The properties are cheap so i can afford to pay cash the issue how ever is that the rent is also cheap in Update : Yes i know being a distant landlord is difficult so if it makes economic
How can I get Cheaper Auto Insurance?
I'm looking to buy a 03-06 Mitsubishi Evolution was wondering if it is possible to get cheaper insurance? My Father owns a Business can we classify it as a business Vehicle? I'll be 18 when i buy it. I can afford the payments, Just not insuracne, lol""
How do I prove auto insurance to MN DMV?
My license is revoked and I need to prove to the state of Minnesota that I am insurable. I do not have a vehicle to insure right now, and don't understand why it would be necessary to get insurance for any period of time since I don't have a vehicle, but it is mandated by the state that I prove I have insurance. All the insurance companies I have talked to say that I need to have insurance for a year or the state will take my license again. Is there a way around this or is there an easier way to prove I am insurable without having to pay $1200 for a year of insurance when I don't even have a car?""
How would insurance work in college?
When I go to college, how would I be able to receive insurance, to go to the Dentist or Doctor?""
co op car insurance
co op car insurance
Can 15 minutes really save you 15% on car insurance ......?
.... with Geico?
Why are car insurance companies trying to make me go bankrupt?
Okay, this is extremely frustrating. I'm a 19 year old student, who works part time. I have all-state insurance full coverage, and I drive a 2001 toyota tacoma, which is paid off. And guess how much Allstate charges me every 6 months? $750!!!!!!!!!!!! That is absolutely ridiculous. These son of a bitches are totally ridiculous charging me that. I've never had a ticket, never been in an accident. And I don't care if i'm 19 that price is absolutely absurd for that car. I'm almost at the point where I just wanna go illegal and drive without insurance. I'm looking sleep every night over this I mean seriously do they think a 19 year old college student is made of money. And the funny thing is it's under my parents policy and its this much!!!""
Car insurance for a 21 yr old living in ny?!?
Approx how much does car insurance, per month, cost for a 21 yr old college student from abroad in ny? My sister who lives in the country pays about 130 dollars per month in MA.""
Insurance?
isnt an insurance company suppose to cover your car regradless the person driving it? well my boyfriend was driving my car-just bought-brand new car- and got into an accident. Now my insurance company denied my claim cause they say he wasnt under the insurance. but should my car be cover regradless if the person driving wasnt? I mean I pay monthly payments and then they are just gonna deny me after an accident. could anyone help me? any advice?
Insurance Costs on a 3000GT SL?
I'm 18 and am getting my own car for college. I've been driving my dad's VW Jetta III without a license (he drives with me) for about two years now, as he is a frequent commuter and my high school is close to his work. We never bothered to get a license because we'd have to insure me (and I was going to drive with him anyway as a 'learner'). My eye is on my neighbor's 1994 3000GT SL. It's a non-turbo, and in good mechanical condition. But since I technically just started driving with a license (even though I've commuted for two years now), I'm afraid I might get charged by the insurance company like a 16 year old. It's because of this I didn't get the twin-turbo VR-4, as I heard insurance costs more than the car after a couple years. How much can an 18 year old college going kid like me expect to pay with the SL model?""
Ne 1 know a cheap 4x4 insurance company?
Ne 1 know a cheap 4x4 insurance company?
How much would car insurance be ?
I was just wondering how much insurance would be im 17 a girl (ive heard insurance is cheaper for girls) and about to start my lessons but was just wondering what the insurance cost is on a fiat cinquecento or a vauxhall corsa (which model of vauxhall corsa is the cheapest?) I live in a fairly rural area would this make any difference to the insurance cost ? Would it be cheaper to maybe go on my parents insurance ??? Also what insurance company is the cheapest? Please please please someone help :L
Is it cheaper on insurance to make payments on a car or buy it straight out?
Is it cheaper on insurance to make payments on a car or buy it straight out?
Insurance coverage with DUI involved?
My father recently crashed his car into a van after consuming over the legal limit of alcohol (well over knowing him), and is concerned whether Progressive insurance will cover vehicle damages for him and the other driver. Also notable is that his car is pretty much totaled, I think, and he does have some previous blemishes on his driving record and the car is leased. If someone with some knowledge on these matters would help and give me an idea of what insurance will and will not cover could help it would be much appreciated.""
When getting an insurance quote do you have tell them what your tickets have been reduced to or....?
I am going to get an insurance quote and need to know if I can tell them what my tickets were reduced to or if I have to tell them what I was actually pulled over for.
Periodontal Insurance in Iowa?
I have major gum resession and I need a transplant, which means I need to visit a peridontist. Problem is, I can't find one in Iowa that takes my insurance. (Hawk-i) I really need the surgery and I've been searching for months and haven't had any luck. Please, someone help me out, please.""
""No license, but yes insurance?""
What happens if you drive a car that does have insurance but you don't have a license, and, lets say you crash.""
Cancelled car insurance?
My car insurance got cancelled for misrepresentation of garaging. I travel a lot for work and I had two places. My car got vandalized at my secondary place of residence and the insurance company and after I filed a claim, the insurance company treats is as a misrepresentation. I am about to get an insurance with a different company. Do i need to disclose this fact? How would that affect my rates. I have 1 week left on the policy.""
Affordable car insurance?
whats the cheapest more affordable car insurance company for a student in san diego, ca???""
Ticket for no license and no insurance?
I'm 17 and I got a ticket for not having a license or permit, failure to yield to an emergency vehicle and no insurance in California. How deep will this ticket dig into my pockets? Over $500? Big thanks if you can help me out.""
Can u get insurance on a different address to your licence?
Say i live in leeds but my friend lives in bradford and my insurance works out cheaper on their address. Can i ge insurance to her address even though i do not live there?
How much would insurance be for a 17 year old male in Alabama?
Please only educated, backed-up answers.""
Maternity Health Insurance?
I am in the state of MI..I am looking for some really good health insurance for pregnant women..I already spoke to blue cross blue shield and all there plans only cover the delivery..I need something affordable that covers everything from prenatal-going home from hospital..It doesnt have to cover it 100% but at least the majority. Thank you
Is Mercedes expensive to maintain?
im 18 just got myself first car 05 c320 4matic. my parents are paying for gas and insurance which is 350$ a month but i will pay for the car payments with a part time job and maybe repairs do you think it will be too much for me?
""Insurance company totaled my car, How much will i get for it?""
I was in a pretty bad accident and the insurance company says that my car is totaled and they will write me a check for the amount. My question is what amount? On KBB would it be the trade in value, private party value, or the suggested retail value?""
Is classic car insurance better for a 1984 corvette or regular car insurance?
im planning on getting a 1984 corvette but the insurance for it is a little too high.i just found out about classic car insurance but i really don't know much about it.but for classic car insurance,am i limited to a certain number of things like how far i can drive my car,when i can drive,etc?will the insurance actually be less or more for classic car insurance?and what is the best classic car insurance company i should go with?""
Is there a cheap car insurance place in New Jersey for a 17 year old girl to get insurance?
Im 17 and I turn 18 in July and I bought my own car, its a 1992 toyota and I want my own insurance, I know it's going to be pricey a lot but I don't want to be under my parents insurance. I don't mind only getting liability but I need some help finding a cheaper insurance place in New Jersey on the upper east coast. Thanks!!""
What is the coverage characteristics of disability insurance?
What is the coverage characteristics of disability insurance?
What kind of health insurance can i get if i dont have legal documents?
What kind of health insurance can i get if i dont have legal documents?
Learners Permit and Insurance!?
Can I have insurance while having my learners permit? (I currently live in Orlando, FL)""
co op car insurance
co op car insurance
Allstate Teen Car Insurance?
Does anyone know the title and who sings the song on the Allstate Teen Car Insurance commercial where they drive away and never come back? I swear I've heard parts of it on something else and its driving me insane.
What is The Age Limit To Use My Medical Insurance?
Hi I'm 20 years old and i want to know what is the age limit medical insurance covers? I hardly use it and now that i need it to have an eye check, I don't know if it will cover me... I reside in California. Thank You!""
Can home insurance companies completely deny you because you have a dog that attacked someone at one point?
I'm going to try to keep this short.. just know that, this is for my dog and I'm trying to save him... he's a 10 year old Akita. A year ago, our family dog bit someone. They sued for an insane amount of money, but it wasn't our fault completely, so our home insurance and their health insurance settled out of court for a lot less. Still, the settlement was expensive, and our home insurance didn't like covering a 6-digit figure claim because of the dog so they dropped us. Since then, all home insurance companies don't want to cover us, even if we don't have a dog , this information is by my father who doesn't like the dog already. There is only one house insurance that will cover us, according to my father, but they will only cover us if we don't have a dog, and even then they will charge 4 times as much. I'm not old enough to completely understand how insurance and claims and contracts work, but I'm just trying to save my dog, because my father is going to put him to sleep by the end of this month. I just need a good starting point or phone numbers that could maybe discredit what my father has been saying, or anything that could help. We live in Southern California. Apparently Akitas are listed as vicious, but at the age of 10, he's old enough to be mellow, but still too young to put to sleep. Any help would be appreciated.""
Can my new car be on my parents auto insurance policy if we live in different states?
I recently moved to Michigan for work and just bought a new Mitsubishi Evo, and here the insurance is outrageous (over 300/month) compared to Illinois which is about half as much. Is it possible for me to be on my parents insurance plan if they live in Illinois? I already bought the car and I need insurance one way or another I'm just trying to save some money here, and just wondering if it is possible.""
Can AAA raise my Homeowners insurance rate by $300 for the next 3 years?
My property was stolen from the backseat of my car. AAA is saying if they pay out more than $750 (including my co-pay) then my Homeowners insurance will be raised by $300 for the next 3 years and it will be a point on my property. Is this right/legal??
Cheapest auto insurance in Florida??
Just moved and need some ideas for shopping around for the cheapest auto insurance in Florida.
What is the average annual/weekly contents insurance cost?
What is yours or what is the average?
How are home insurance rates in hawaii?
I'd like to buy close to the water (would be impacted by hurricanes). FLA is ridiculous now-cant get insurance near the water for entire home value. Thought Hwi might be better since they dont get hit so much.
What is the average cost of insurance for a teenage driver per year?
I'm 17, and I'm going to get my provisional license in about a month. Mg r y parents are going to have me pay for my own insurance. I just wanted to get a look at roughly how much my insurance will cost before I get a quote. Thanks!""
How much would the insurance cost?
Im looking at buying either a 2011 shelby GT500 or a 2011 mustang GT. I just want to know how much ill be paying insurance companies for one of these... Im going to be 19 almost 20 by the time I get one of these.
Do I have too much insurance?
I live in California, where the minimum required liability insurance limits are 15/30/5. I drive a 97 Ford Taurus and the cost of a deductible if I were to have full coverage would exceed the value of this old car- so I only have liability. My coverage is 50/100/25. I'm 25, my husband is 22, we have no accidents on our record, are good students and have absolutely no assets whatsoever. I'm beginning to wonder if we have more insurance than we need. I don't think I'm comfortable dropping my insurance to the required 15/30/5 minimum, but at the same time, I'm not sure if finding the happy medium at 25/50/25 would be a wise choice. I just want to make sure we're prepared, but not getting ripped off. Any advice?""
Car insurance for 19 year old?
I currently drive a 2005 Mazda6 (4cyl, 140 hp sedan) and I am under my dads policy. I want to buy a 2008-09 VW GTI which is a 4cyl 200 hp turbo hatch, I want a 2 door, but will opt for the 5 door if it saves a good amount of money. How much more should I expect to pay for insurance with the GTI if on my dad's policy? Will it be cheaper to get my own? Also would waiting until I am 20 to buy the car save more money? I have never had a speeding ticket, I had one minor accident when I was 17, I have had a traffic violation last year, but I wasn't even the driver of the vehicle for the offense, also no points were added to my license for this as I did a traffic course and paid a fine instead. (florida)""
What is the cheapest auto insurance ?
Is safe auto cheaper than pronto insurance?
Am i entitled to my unused car insurance?
After being with my car insurance company over 10 years now, I've never had a claim in which they've had to pay out. I recently purchased a new car and my rates skyrocketed I ...show more""
Multiple auro insurance for vehicles in different states?
Me and my fiancee are relocating to different states for new job. I am moving to south Carolina and she is moving to san diego, California. We have multiple vehicle insurance discount now. If we move is it better to register both vehicles in one state to save on insurance , title and registration. I heard it is expensive to register vehicles in california. Can I register the vehicle in my name in south carolina. she is going to be there working at UCSD and the stay is temporary (max 2 years) or is it against the law?""
Cancelled car insurance?
My car insurance got cancelled for misrepresentation of garaging. I travel a lot for work and I had two places. My car got vandalized at my secondary place of residence and the insurance company and after I filed a claim, the insurance company treats is as a misrepresentation. I am about to get an insurance with a different company. Do i need to disclose this fact? How would that affect my rates. I have 1 week left on the policy.""
""I am 16 and want a 2003 BMW m5, how much would that cost to insure?""
I live in San Diego, California and have not gotten any tickets.""
What are short-term life insurance needs?
I currently have a 5 year term life insurance policy with State Farm and I was wondering if it were possible for me to make a withdrawl or loan from this policy. I researched this some and on some websites it said it wasn't possible; however whenever I look on State Farms website it says the below: The State Farm 5 Year Term policy provides affordable life insurance protection for a five year period and is renewable for subsequent 5-year periods until age 85 (age 80 in NY). It is great for covering any short-term life insurance needs you may have. Short-term life insurance needs may include such things as: * Car loan * College tuition * Home equity loan * Mortgage loan * Business loan * Student loan * Key employee Term insurance may also be appropriate when your life insurance needs are great but your budget is tight. Does this mean I can make a withdrawal so that I can pay off my student loans? Also, it seems that my policy has ended in December; however, I was still charged this month. The policy started in 2005.""
Car insurances for a day help?
I just need to drive my car to my new apartment.Right now i don't have car insurances. Is there any way i can get car insurances just for a day. I live in new jersey. I know i can get a car insurances quote but i don't have enough money right now I just need to move it
How much is insurance on a Kawasaki Ninja R6 with 636cc displacement?
Im wanting to buy this bike, but all the insurance companies I have found are outrageous. Do you know of any that offer cheap insurance?""
In india car insurance have to pay monthly or yearly & how much it cost?
In india car insurance have to pay monthly or yearly & how much it cost?
What's the salary and commission for infinity insurance in California?
Does anyone know?
Do you have to have full coverage on a used car?
im 21 at the moment and my gf has told me that if i get a car it has to have full insurance but thats kinda strange because they have other types of coverage that i wouldnt need
""When people turn 25, should they just kill themselves?""
College is over, you're no longer young and you have to worry about decreasing in health, plus you get taken off your parents health insurance (if you went to college) because society expects you to be paying for it by working now for the rest of your life. You no longer can be immature. Marriage starts to happen, and then kids...blah 100 other reasons more, etc. Source: 17 Year Old, (18 in April) Senior in High School""
Changing Auto Insurance?
My 6 month insurance is up and its time for a renewal, recently i felt that my rates are to high and i would like to change to a different insurance company. But i have a couple of questions before i proceed and would like some suggestions. 1)How do i change my Auto insurance? Such as what are the normal processes one goes through. 2)Will cancelling my current account with them result in any extra charges? it is a renewal btw. 3)Should i get a quote from Geico first? (im trying to switch from Safeco to Geico) 4)Are there other Auto insurance companies i should consider? THANKS!""
co op car insurance
co op car insurance
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/driving-insurance-quotes-naples-florida-francis-charlson/"
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