#im just glad to know that im not the only one who thinks his maps are weird

[beelas-bees]

Cheeteh z, answer honestly, do you hate women

[definitelynotshouting]

WOULD YOU STILL LOVE ME IF I WAS A WORM 😭😭😭😭 WHAT A THING TO WAKE UP TO!

-☀️

Oh my god thw wings being a physical manifestation of how Mumbo doesnt know Grian anymore. He is an entirely new person, definitely mentally, technically physically-- even if he looks the same. Mumbo honing in on the wings ("his wings ruffle...behind him" "it's a foreign motion...that escapes translation") that are the thing that's different and needs a "map" drawn of it, because it's the only thing that's actually different. Sure, Mumbo can tell grian doesnt even act the same anymore, but that's much harder to put a finger on. He didnt have those wings before.

^I like to think there's some form of uncanny valley effect that people who knew Grian before feel looking at him now, ignoring the wings.

-☀️

"Then he smiles, porcelain teeth flashing in the glistering sun.

The cold, open pit of his depthless eyes fails to catch it."

Really fucking love this description ough

-☀️

"“You’re not supposed to change me back!” Grian shrills, bristling."

IT'S TOO EARLY IN THE MORNING FOR THIS TEM WTF (it is past 10am)

-☀️

"with the exquisite delicacy of a Player"

I SEE YOU YOURE NOT SNEAKY

-☀️

The wings again!! *is in distress* (side note i love seeing the world building youve been telling us about finally in the fic!!) Ok this actually makes the way Mumbo focused on the wings mean so much more. Wings are dangerous to code in, thats why Players use spotters. Grian vanished from Evo and showed up on Hermitcraft YEARS(?) later, without a word to anyone, and reappeared with those wings. Imagine going on a trail with a friend whose never hiked before and then they stop responding to your messages only to show up again after a couple of months like "Hey I just climbed Everest". You would most definitely be distressed to say the least. (although, question: how proficient was grian's coding?)

-☀️

Man this one-shot. Too many feels this early in the morning 😭 The way you've managed to capture that sense of unease around Grian. His actions are unpredictable- you dont know if he's going to laugh or get upset- really nicely encapsulates Mumbo's internal feeling that he doesn't know grian anymore. Those moments where he laughs or stares with those blank eyes, those are normal-- but linger a second too long, or catch a glimpse of the worlds that have passed since Evo started-- and he can't shake the feeling that something is wrong with Grian

-☀️

AAAAAAAAA HI SUN ANON!!! omg im so glad you enjoyed the oneshot!!! :D

Omg YES im so so glad what i was aiming for with the wings came through, thats exactly what i was going for!! This is the only physical indication that Grian has changed, and therefore the most distinct!!! Ofc Mumbo is gonna hone in on that-- its the clearest aspect he can see. And yeah, i think the first few times people saw him with the wings, it was definitely a little uncanny valley, until they got used to it

OKAY I'LL BE REAL THE EXQUISITE DELICACY BIT WAS NOT INTENTIONAL BUT IS A VERY HAPPY ACCIDENT ALDJWKDNEKNDKDE altho i did really enjoy messing with some wordplay in other areas. My particular favorite is the "inner machinations of a dropper" line-- it was such a fun way to refer to mechanical parts while simultaneously making it sound like the dropper is up to no good 😂😂😂😂😂😂

It was super nice to really put this aspect of the worldbuilding into the fic-- one of these days i'll probably rewrite chapters 1 and 2, and maybe do a little editing on 3, just so i can sorta bake those concepts in there with a little more deliberation than i did when i was first posting :] BUT YES altho its not so much dangerous (for a Player, at least) as it is difficult, and very finicky. Grian's coding is super proficient as a Player (he's still working on melding the instinctive coding of the Watchers with his Player brain tho), so he was always very capable of it, but like you pointed out, under normal circumstances he would have 100% asked someone to be his spotter while he coded them in, just in case he bugged out

And yep, we're talking a timespan of years here!!! This is a bit loose, so its subject to some minor changes, but my general timeline is that Grian, once Watcher-ified, was trapped with the Watchers for about 2-3 years before he made his escape. After that he bounced between hubs and servers for a few months, before ending up on Hermitcraft to stay. The fic itself takes place somewhere around early mid-season, i think-- since i headcanon each season to take place over a few years rather than a few months, i'd say this means Grian has been with Hermitcraft for, oh.... a little under a year now by the time this fic takes place, if that makes sense. Again these are not concrete but thats the general timeframe we're talking here. I'll probably make a separate post about this later, but in Player culture its not SUPER weird to go gallivanting on your own for a few years-- but the complete radio silence and abrupt exit from Evo are what make this notable from the norm to Mumbo and everyone else who knew Grian before

Im so deeply and genuinely happy that the sense of unease came across so well-- i was admittedly worried that the pacing was a bit fast for how Grian's reactions kept turning on a dime, but this reassures me that it works :] i wanted it to really feel like this is a familiar stranger we're looking at through Mumbo's eyes, and also i wanted to give Grian some room to display those uglier trauma symptoms that nobody talks about much in fiction. I like to think that first year back on Hermitcraft was a difficult one for him, mood-wise, because behind that rough facade his brain is about as scorched-earth as it fuckin gets

Sun anon i always ADORE your analysis thank you so so much for sending them 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 it makes my day every time, truly. Im so glad you liked the fic!!! :D

[prettyboykatsuki]

hi fang!!

i apologise if this is something u get asked often, but ur writing is most definitely my favourite to consume and ive never felt feelings the way i do when i read anything you've written, and was wondering if you have (or have already posted) any writing tips that u could give me?

reading your creations for so long has honestly really inspired me to write too but i have no idea where to start in terms of anything. i've never attempted to write before, i've always been more of a reader, but if i could make anything even close to what you do for beloved characters and fandoms then it would make me so so so happy.

if you need me to be more specific about what i'm having trouble with i could try and narrow it down but honestly everything is pretty accurate T-T

anyways thank u for posting everything u do, i am eternally grateful! at this point im conditioned to get excited every time im scrolling on dash and see the green katsuki pfp <3 hope ur 8 hours wherever u are isnt too perilous >:(

this made my lower lip tremble how could u think so highly of lil ol me.... im very glad my writing could invoke such feelings you!! enough so to even inspire like how huge is that... im a very unpolished and messy writer by nature so im extra moved when people are kind to me about this kind of thing. like.. ough. i have moved u... what a world...

i dont know if i have any good writing advice to give you!! im very clumsy in my own writing. here is some advice i have given people before

my biggest piece of writing advice is stop worrying about it and do everything lightly. i think there is a lot of pressure and expectation on people who are trying their hand at any creative thing to hit a point of being objectively good. im a huge perfectionist in my normal life - but because of that, i always miss out things i could actually do. being that caught up on the details made it so that i never actually tried at anything

a lot of my writing has typing errors and things i could do better but i have to intentionally allow myself that grace because if i don't - i would've never finished a piece of writing in the first place. i only get better if i write and i only write if im not so caught up on the details. there is always going to be a learning curve. im always going to look back at old writing and wince a little at all the things i can do better.

but at the time, i had the confidence to put that out into the world. now that its out, i can look at myself critically. posting for me is a way of holding myself accountable if that makes sense. everyones already seen the flawed version, so there's no longer any reason to not improve or be embarrassed. its also why i dont delete fics even when i hate them later. there was one person who liked the cringe worthy sincere aspect of me. how nice would it be if i could make something even better than that.

writing can be anything you want. it can be the most important thing you've ever done or the thing you do on the bus ride home. it can change your life or you can forget about it the very next day. its yours. your voice is always all yours.

but you it can never be anything to you if you don't just give it your most honest try. do everything very lightly. pick an idea, map out a beginning middle and end, and write a story.

more practically - it will help immensely for you to observe the way other people write first. try to read critically instead of for enjoyment and see what you like. what inspires you? a persons flow, diction, dialogue? and emulate that in your own way. when you start your voice will not be much more than a mish-mash of all the things you love and that's okay. that's what all writers with very distinct voice tend to do anyways.

i know it seems counter intuitive and pointless to stress but really - the best thing you can do for yourself when it comes to writing is just sitting down and giving it a try. pick any idea, plot out a simple 3 point beginning middle and end, and just see what you can do. you can be critical and edit as much as you want after. just get it down on paper first the best you can and don't worry yourself sick over each sentence or nothing will ever get written

i can try and give you more practical advice if you let me know what you need!! ive given writing advice before but im very under qualified for that i fear. even so i hope it helps you a little to give it a shot. i know it sucks to hear u just have to try and see but it rlly is true

[hella1975]

wait hold on a ursa takes both zuko and azula away fic??? idk how anyone hasn’t done this concept but hella you’ve tapped into a concept that has to be explored at this point! making it zukka is also just the norm around here too.

ah im glad you like the sound of it! i refuse to believe im the first to think of that idea bc i dont think ive ever had an original thought but there's definitely a lack of ursa exploration in the fandom. the thing with this wip is that it's going to be so ginormous and so multi-faceted that it's actually really hard to explain the plot of? like ursa takes zuko and azula with her but ursa is so damaged by what she's been through and is too busy prioritising survival to be loving anymore and their life on the run is so brutal that zuko and azula - still only 9 and 11 years old which is a big reason of why their relationship is able to heal, bc they're still so young - really lean on each other to cope. initially it's a survival thing, but they grow to just genuinely get on well with and care deeply about each other. and one way they do that is that zuko starts telling azula stories! like the two of them become huge avatar nerds bc of these stories and actually i might just give you a snippet bc this is rlly hard to explain LMAO

Neither of them had any idea how to just be nice to each other, but Zuko wanted to be nice. He wanted Azula to be safe. He wanted to protect her. She was his little sister. She always had been, and she needed him. Now, more than ever. 

“You know, Mother used to tell me about our great-grandfather.” Zuko said quietly into the shadows, a whisper to ensure Ursa, always so quick to anger these days, didn’t wake up. “You know he was Avatar Roku?” 

For a while, it was painfully silent, to the point Zuko was certain Azula wouldn't respond. Then; “Of course I know. Some of us actually paid attention in our lessons.” Azula sniped, but she sounded a little too cutting, in a way she only sounded when she was unsure. She didn’t like it when she didn’t know what Zuko was leading to. 

Zuko turned to face her direction, the cheap blanket scratching his chin and not covering all of his body. At eleven-years-old, Zuko was finally starting to grow into himself.  

They were in a town on the outskirts of the Earth Kingdom, barely a speck on the map, and currently, their names were Riku and Aoi. Ursa has been very clear; her children were to never use their birthnames, no matter how alone they thought they were. They were living in a cottage with half a roof, their mother funding the rent by sewing patches onto dresses for a seamstress. She was barely in the house, but Zuko knew even when they left in a few day’s time – as they never stayed in one place longer than a week or two – he would still barely see Ursa. He wondered if she knew how reclusive she’d become. 

“She told me stories about all the Avatars. I always wished she’d tell you them too.” Zuko said a little sadly. “I never understood why she didn’t.” 

This silence was different, and they both knew Zuko wasn’t just talking about the stories. 

“Tell me.” Azula breathed, so quiet Zuko almost missed it. 

“The stories?” Zuko asked in surprise. He had been waiting for Azula to cut him down, to tell him to go away like she used to. But...  

He realised maybe Azula wanted to be nice too. Maybe she was tired of being looked at like a monster by the people supposed to love her.  

Maybe she was just a nine-year-old girl who needed a bedtime story every now and then. 

“Yes, Zuko.” Azula hissed, and his name was so shocking it was like a curse. “The stories. Tell me about the Avatars.” 

So, Zuko did. 

“Water, earth, fire, air.” Zuko whispered, remembering how Mother told it. In the shadows, Azula’s eyes burned gold. “Long ago, the four nations lived together, but everything changed when the Fire Nation, the superior nation, began to share its wealth. The Hundred Year War began, and the only person able to stand in the Fire Nation’s way was the Avatar, master of all four elements. But when the world called for him, he fled...” 

It became a tradition, after that. Zuko would lie beside his sister on the nights neither of them could sleep, and after an entire day of hiding himself, he’d turn to Azula and just talk. In Kyoshi Island, he told her of Avatar Kyoshi murdering Chin the Great. In Makapu village, he told her of Avatar Roku – Great-Grandfather Roku – battling a volcano. And in the Western Air Temple, he told her of the Avatar who never was. 

“He’s out there somewhere, though.” Zuko uttered wondrously. “One-hundred-and-twelve, the last airbender. Can you imagine it?” 

“You’re in your head too much.” Azula sighed. She always pretended not to care, but as the months dragged on, she allowed herself more. First, it was in her asking for a specific story. Then sometimes, she’d slip up and laugh. In the fragments of these nights handed over to ancient legends, as scraps of lies left behind in their wake with every new roof they found themselves beneath, Azula was more herself than ever. She could be, in front of her big brother. That was something she learned. 

They learned other things, too. They learned that the Earth Kingdom was starving, that the Fire Nation was hated, that people weren’t rebelling; they were suffering. The story changed. When Zuko saw technological advancements that bewildered him in the Northern Air Temple, he stopped saying that the Fire Nation was the superior nation. When he saw children with burn scars and amputated limbs, he changed ‘began to share its wealth’ to ‘attacked.’ When the stories he told his little sister of the Avatar turned into a lifeline, a speck of hope in a world of ashes, ‘fled’ became ‘vanished.’

Zuko learned that a war was a war, that his father was not a hero by any means, that they got out just in time. 

And it was hard, but the two had their own rebellions. Zuko and Azula didn’t get on in Caldera, but out here with a string of fake identities behind them and a death sentence at the end of it, they only had each other. Their mother was a wound, their father was a blade, and they were, through it all, still just kids. They leaned on each other in the places they used to bruise. Azula took the softness she tortured her brother over and began to protect it. Zuko took the coldness in his sister he used to despise and chased it away. When Azula drew the curtains and hid in cupboards to hold a flame in her palm and just breathe, Zuko made sure Ursa didn’t catch her. When Zuko lay beside Azula and talked to her until she finally fell asleep, Azula didn't push him away. 

Azula, he whispered, and it was a promise that she could still be who she wanted to be. 

Zuko, she breathed back, and it was a recognition that, through it all, she still saw him. 

[seerofmike]

yo. not sure if ure the right person to ask but idk where else to go. i recently came back to apex and am trying to catch up w the lore except im a bit confused. i knew octane hated his dad and was working under him to fuck him over later but now he fell for his dads BS? or am i missing something? and i heard his dad isnt even his dad but his grandpa and im just confused.

also, before i took a break from apex i used to read ur cryptane fics a lot. i found u still into apex and still writing for it as well which is why im asking u. rly like ur fics, tyvm for them :) ty in advance if tumblr doesnt eat this ask.

im glad u like my fics thank you!!!

okay so, not entirely sure when you left or how much you know of the current storyline but quick recap, octane's abusive POS father does some terrorist shit and continuously ridicules him and disowns him in that one season 9 comic, then starts running for Syndicate Head Honcho in season 12 after some fuckery framing maggie for the destruction of olympus.

obviously concerned about his father who is uhhh an evil terrorist (not like maggie, the cool terrorist <3) octane tells lifeline he'll break into his father's safe to gather some info. duardo catches him, but basically like. bribes octane into 'working' for him and octane agrees because he's like teehee!!! i'm gonna screw him over!! che will be sooooooo impressed

then over the course of the quest duardo continuously praises octane and convinces him that he's doing good things by donating to the Frontier Corps. the climax of the quest is lifeline managing to break into duardo's safe while octane finds a video on his computer from a press conference where duardo seems to confess that he loves his family more than anything and that his son is very important to him.

the secret in duardo's safe is his own death certificate. lifeline wants to expose him. octane wants to wait it out and see what happens and might be a little emotionally vulnerable from the whole shebang (as is lifeline tbh cuz she likes to take the whole weight of the outlands on her shoulders), so some petty arguing ensues but it escalates until octane grabs the certificate from her and burns it. they break up as friends officially and both remark that their friendship has been dead for a long long time.

fast forward, octane apparently helps 'duardo' campaign but doesn't question him until the night of the election where he wins, and duardo announces he's taking over lifeline's organization and installing her mother as the new head. octane confronts him after the election, devastated and angry at the idea that duardo had played him. his 'father' insists he hasn't, so when octane demands to know his true identity he tells him: torres silva, his grandfather, and continues to gaslight octane into thinking he's doing it For The Family. in the epilogue, lifeline teams up with maggie to do some terrorist girl shit herself.

so the quest ends with lifeline and octane on opposite sides, and also the reveal that the video that made octane think his father actually cared about him was in fact his grandfather talking about his father LMAAAAAO

how eager / thrilled / willing he is to work with torres seems to fluctuate a little and hasn't really been explored since. on the one hand, he shows moments of anxiety about the whole situation like in this image in the newcastle teasers where the description explicitly says he's nervous about the whole thing;

and in the final chapter he seems genuinely upset and freaked out about the fact that lifeline's mom has taken over the frontier corps, who he thinks is 'not cool' (so true bestie)

he also seems to occasionally be suspicious of torres, right now when you drop in certain areas of the new map (Broken Moon), if he's alone (and notably, *only* if he's alone) he will ask himself what torres wants with the place.

on the other hand, he seems...Fine with engaging with torres still? and maybe even helps him do shitty things? it's implied in this interview between seer and lisa stone that torres paid her to pin the blame of boreas's turbulance on seer, and the way octane reacts after the interview seems to imply that either a.) he knew what torres was planning and is amused or b.) he didn't know, but regardless, was very amused by what torres did to him.

in a loading screen torres also says this (context: they are filming a PR video apologizing for the giant sea monster attacking the legends)

it's not outright confirmed octane still helps him do his political shit after campaigning with him, but it's likely. he also helped pitch boreas as a new apex map to torres with seer and still seems very engaged with him despite the bombs dropped at the end of s12. given that he helped seer pitch boreas, and questions (alone) on cleo about what torres wants with the moon, he seems to suspect something is up, but he isn't as open about it as others and seems kind of hesitant to say anything.

so. the verdict;

i get what apex was trying to do in the season 12 quest. torres DOES start love-bombing octane all of a sudden, which makes octane give literal pause like Twice because "what?? he called me son???? he's never done that before ??????" (<- transgender btw) and i think they were hoping to give the impression that octane is gaslit and manipulated into siding with torres. the narrative also acknowledges that octane's actions are Extremely selfish here and driven entirely by emotion and wanting to feel loved than any sort of logical reasoning or 'greater good' like he insists.

that being said, it really needed more time in the oven. he goes REALLY quickly from "i'm gonna trick him!! teehee!" to burning one of the very few bridges he has and possibly throwing the entire outlands into turmoil because daddy said he loved him once. then it goes very quickly again from "octane unconditionally supports his (grand)father because he is desperate for his approval" to now "octane may in fact regret this and be very suspicious of him" but the latter thing is kind of up in the air given that octane still actively works for him and seems to do a little bit of villainous shit himself.

right now, i think they are intentionally going with a rather messy narrative because like...abuse is messy. family is messy. being manipulated and gaslit and you yourself manipulating and gaslighting your friends and repeating this cycle of abuse because your abuser suddenly pretends he cares about you because he wants to USE you for political gain is a very messy story and it always would have been.

i don't think octane 100% is onboard with torres or fell entirely for his BS, but i don't think he hates him either or what he's doing. it seems like there *IS* a part of him that cares for people Other than himself, but octane's focus is kind of on Me Me Me and right now what matters to Me Me Me is the fact that HE feels loved and gets what HE wants, outlands be damned, and admitting he was wrong means that torres does not love him, and that che was right. and since he also happens to be very petty he doesn't want to admit she was right since they're fighting rn LMAO

i think the story suffers from the main problem with All of apex's storytelling which is just that there wasn't enough time to sit with what it presents but overall i think this is like. fine. almost good, even. one of the better characters arcs apex has going for it right now.

(sorry for how long this is btw i think i went off topic <////3)

(btw cryptane enjoyer. they have voicelines now. they're shite but by god do they have them)

[darkicedragon]

Looking at the other things on my secret santa's list.

Why is buying desk stationary difficult??

Because I barely know her so Idont know if she likes bright colours or if I should get a mesh or a big one or -

(Im looking at desk organisers, so maybe I'm looking at the wrong things)

Friend did point out that in his experience, people who want stationary are super fussy about it and.... Yeah. Okay. I like poking around in the stationary department and I want specific pens, so this is probably why I'm so stressed about this, pfft. -- 'Feels like -1c/30f'

Where did this come from??? All the cars were frosted over when I got outside, haha. -- Wait.

I think I can still take part in the activity bingo! ò0ó I'm on site; it's not building specific.

Now to...

Try and pick up a card….

It's entirely in the opposite direction of where I get my bus in a different building and my bus is sharp on time. Maybe I can try going over if I have a lull in work... -- Poor coworker. He's being recognised as 'the one with the black eye' now. 😂😂😂

-- Walk past another department's in/out box for mail.

There's a packet of crisps and a banana in the inbox.

....Okay. It was gone the next time I passed, hah. -- Gone upstairs to get mail.

Swipe card reader to get back to office corridor.

It doesn't work.

?

…….

I swiped the the letter I was bringing back... -- Woah, more people for the afterwork christmas meal! \o/ Only like, three people aren't going, and one because she's literally not in the city at the time, ahhah.

Already glad I agreed. :) -- All things done today! I'll go run to the other building and pick up a card! ò0ó

Gets outside and looks around.

Wait.

*checks map* Oh. Oh. This is WAY further than I thought it would be and I have to cross multiple roads to get there.

Yeah. Nah. That's not a 'short trip away from desk' but an adventure.

I'll just print it off instead. 😂

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

Mono’s on a Mission.

Monotaro, a-are you sure you’re going the right way?

Well, usually I’d take a different route...But with all the doors and vent shafts shut, I’m trying to find my way around.

Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure I know how to get back to the lab, just follow me!

Uuugh...This had better be good.

...

What the hell’re we even tryin’ for anyway!? Those yoikers yoinked the yoinked bomb we yoinked and we ended up with jack fuckin’ nothing!

That, brother, is what we’re tryin’ t’ find out! It’s why we gotta get to the lab and contact the boss lady!

Though if you want my guess...I think Shirogane’s takin’ a hostage.

A hostage? You mean...?

The only person who got locked up in here is Kaede Akamatsu. I think’s Shirogane’s keepin’ her ‘ere to lure the FF into a trap.

The hell you sayin’!? The Future Foundation ain’t gonna bust their asses just to save one little girl!

You’re just saying that because you want to eat her, aren’t you?

What gave you that idea!?

UUUGH! Monotaro! That is the THIRD TIME we’ve walked through this doorway!

It is!?

MONOTARO. DO-YOU-NOT-

ABUBUBUBUBUH! How dare you even SPEAK, you broken toaster!

...

Monosuke, don’t be so mean! Monodam is only trying to help.

His “help” is the only reason we’re IN this fucking situation! He had the bomb right in the palm o’ his hand, and he let Akamatsu slip it away from ‘im!

Well...it’s not like he had fingers?

Seriously! The one thing that makes you mildly useful is yer’ rocket boosters, and you can’t even use that shit correctly!

...I...

*THUD!*

AACK!?

Don’t listen to him Monodam. If you have something to suggest, go ahead.

THEN we’ll judge you on it’s usefulness or not.

...THANK-YOU.

MONOTARO. IF-I-AM-NOT-MISTAKEN, DID-YOU-NOT-USE-A-MAP-EARLIER-TO-FIND-THE-RESOURCE-ROOM?

Huh? Uh...yeah?

DID-YOU-MISPLACE-THE-MAP-AT-ANY-POINT?

No, I still have it!

...!?

...!?

...!?

...!?

AND...YOU-AREN’T-USING-IT...WHY-EXACTLY?

...Huh?

IF-WE-USE-THE-MAP, WE-CAN-FIND-THE-MAIN-LAB-WITHOUT-ANY-TROUBLE.

...Hey, you’re right! Ah! There’s using your noggin’

Oh for fuck-GIMME!

Hey!

*Monosuke swipes the map from Monotaro when he pulls it out.

Alright, everyone follow me.

At LAAAST! Just hurry up and get the fuckin’ moniter on!

*Monophanie and Monotaro on command power up the large monitor in the corner of Ando’s lab. Within a few seconds, it starts a call.

...Hello?

Yo, Boss Lady! It’s us!

Oh good. You remembered to call me in case of emergency’s. I’ve been waiting for you.

Yeah, about that. What’s the big idea? The lab’s been locked down and we can barely move about as much as we used to!

Don’t worry. I was waiting for you to contact me, then I was planning on raising the shutters on the interior doors.

INTERIOR? AM-I-TO-TAKE-IT-YOU-DON’T-INTEND-TO-OPEN-THE-MAIN-DOORS?

No. Nor do I plan on lifting the defensive plating. Not until Kaede Akamatsu is dead.

Wait...until she’s dead? You mean you didn’t lock her in here because you wanted a hostage?

No. I don’t care for hostages unless they’re on my target list. Speaking of which, the reason I wanted to contact you is because of exactly that.

With Ando gone, your job as his retainers and helpers has gone with him. If we ever recapture him, I might reemploy you in a pinch, but...

Uh...Shirogane...If I may?

Didn’t you tell us that you planned to have us assist with Danganronpa Survivor?

WHEN it happens. Leave the setup to me. Even with all the setbacks, we’re coming very close.

But I will tell you this much. Survivor will NEVER succeed, so long as Kaede Akamatsu is still alive. There’s no way she’s getting out of that lab, so do whatever it takes to make sure she perishes.

I-FAIL-TO-SEE-HOW-ONE-GIRL’S-DEATH-CAN-DICTATE-WHETHER-OR-NOT-DANGANRONPA-SURVIVOR-GOES-THROUGH-OR-NOT.

Never you mind the logistics, just trust me. You’ll also be glad to know that I’m currently working on getting you-know-what powered up and prepared.

R-Really!? We finally get to-!?

Why didn’t you just do that in the first place!?

There was no need for them. The original purpose of those machines was to keep lore and order, but given that law and order was usually kept in those labs, I didn’t see the need.

Then how come we didn’t get these hours ago when the FF stormed the lab!?

I didn’t know about that until later. Sorry, you can blame Akira’s incompetence for that one.

Akira, off-screen: Sorrryyyy~

Jesus Christmas...

Awright, whatever’s. We’ll do it. But what’s in it for us?

Yeah, we’ve been locked in here like prisoners for who knows how long now? Don’t we deserve some kind of reward?

After it’s done...! Haven’t I already made lots of promises to you Kubs? I promise I’ll follow through with all of them once this is all settled.

A promise is a promise! And if she promised, she can’t break it!

Fair enuf...We’ll see it done Boss Lady.

Good. And one more thing...

Yeah?

DON’T...disappoint me...

*Tsumugi ends the call.

Well, we got a while before our babies come online, so I guess we wait for now.

MAN! SCREW THAT! Shirogane wants this over and done with, and the longer we wait, the more chance Future Foundation has gettin’ in here!

What part of the door’s being totally impenetrable went over your head!?

But the Future Foundation are crafty! If we attack Akamatsu now, we’ll catch her by surprise!

Don’t worry! I got a plan!

Oho...YOU’VE got a plan?

YEP! I sure do! Jus’ watch and learn fella’s! I’ll bring back her head on a stick by sundown!

A-ABOUT-THAT...

*Monodam raises his voice.

What is it now?

NO. IT’S-NOTHING. IT-IS-JUST...

Just what Monodam?

Yeah, spit it out.

ARE-WE-ABSOLUTELY-SURE-THIS-IS-GOING-TO-BE-AS-EASY-AS-WE-THINK?

What’re you sayin’? We kill people all the time. It’s basically our job to torture people.

YES. THAT-IS-TRUE. BUT-BACK-THEN, WE-HAD-THE-PROTECTION-OF-THE-KILLING-GAME-RULES. NOW-WE-DON’T.

WE-CAN-FIGHT-KAEDE-AKAMATSU, BUT-SHE’S-MORE-THAN-CAPABLE-OF-FIGHTING-US-BACK. I-FEAR-IF-WE-GET-COCKY, SHE-MAY-DESTROY-US-ALL.

I-DO-NOT-WANT-TO-LOSE-YOU-ALL-AGAIN, NOT-AFTER-EVERYTHING.

Hrrgh...

Stop growling Monosuke. Monodam...kind of has a point. I mean, most humans can’t fly...

Yeah, I mean...Kaede Akamatsu’s a lot stronger than I remember her being...Then again, my memory’s pretty bad, so...

Your memory is fine in this case Monotaro. But it’s not like we could have ever known how strong she really was back then. Like Monodam said, no one thought to attack us because they didn’t have the strength or the gear, or the power in general.

Hey, what’s with you guy’s gettin’ cold feet over this!? What’s gotten up your crack Monodam!?

I...

[Flashback]

I’m gonna stick to the mission and get these bombs dismantled. If you and your siblings turn back and don’t come after me from this point on…Then…

*sigh* I promise I’ll spare you. We don’t have to see each other ever again.

I-SIMPLY-FEEL-IF-WE-DO-NOT-PROVOKE-KAEDE-AKAMATSU, SHE-WILL-NOT-ATTACK-US-IN-TURN. IT-MAY-BE-OPTIMAL-FOR-OUR-SURVIVAL-NOT-TO-START-A-FIGHT-WITH-HER.

Like...a bee?

I-SUPPOSE.

Oh, so your plan is to just...ignore Shirogane’s orders. REAAAL smart of ya...

THAT-IS-NOT-AT-ALL-WHAT-I...

Well what DID ya mean?

...

Fuck this...Monokid, whatever plan you’ve got, just go for it. If you need us to do anythin’, just say the word.

Keeheeheehee! Oh, bro...There’s only one thing I want you to do.

Sit back and enjoy the performance!

[nonclassyparty]

THE FUCKING REALISATION SHE HAD ABT HER HAVING BEEN IN YEOSANGS PLACE TWO YEARS AGO BLEW MY MIND, I SHIT YOU NOT, I GOT UP AND HAD TO PULL OUT MY PENCIL AND A PIECE OF PAPER TO MAP OUT THIS SHIT TO VISUALISE IT BECAUSE MY MIND WAS TOO OVERWHELMED AHAJSKDJ

glad to see fellow oc apologists !! like y/n bb girl *i* understand you, how abt WE get married rn 💍🧎‍♀️

and i am baffled by how everyone, her included, are siding with wooyoung instead of mingi in this parallel situation (ik she hasnt forgiven woo or anything, im talking abt the *positions* of mingi and woo in the parallel) because even though what mingi did and said was shitty af and her feelings are valid especially towards mingi not mentioning the thing at all after all this time, i still think choosing to date and be on the side of the person who has said awful things about your BEST FRIEND and never apologised for any of it is more hurtful than anything.

ofc wooyoung falling for yeosang is totally valid and like she said, it hurts like hell but you can get over it because you want the best for your best friend. but the problem isnt just wooyoung not bringing it up, he feels shitty for doing this too, but to LIE and thus hurt her when she straight up asked abt it, knowing she’s been continuously hurt by her loved ones throughout her life and woo being her only piece of family rn is insaneeeee to me. like she aint just a casual friend of yours, THATS YOUR MFKING BEST FRIEND !!

but for me, all of that is *nothing* compared to him attacking her for being broken and acting on her feelings after finding all of this out on her own, instead of being on her side apologising and being there for her when her heart breaks. like bro, we are asking the BARE MINIMUM from you woo 😭 like i get it she doesnt like the person you are dating but now is NOT the time to be protective over your partner in this situation ?? or am i even more mentally ill than i thought for seeing this whole situation this way 😭😭 ?

akjfdkghfghdfghdkfghdf waittttttttttt

okay so what you said about how she's siding with wy as well thats TEA!!!! bc it is wrong, she knows its not right (obviously since she's the one in pain rn like she knows it sucks and that wy was a little shit for that) but theres still that envious little part of her that was like "damn i wish mingi fought that hard for ME" bc deep down she's not faulting mingi for not choosing her bc she understands, she understood then and she especially understands now but she's still resenting him for it especially now after seeing wooyoung (who is like HER PERSON) fight with her just to stay with ys. its just a very human thing to do, we all want to be that someone's first choice 😭

as for the whole attacking her ordeal, WELL...let's look at it from wy's perspective a little bit. he cares about ys a lot and ys is as vulnerable and delicate as she is maybe even more than her actually. so wy's first instinct was to protect him now HEAR ME OUT... wy was obviously aware that yn would be upset by this and he was scared that ys would get the brunt of it. and also imagine ys just standing there while yn rages at him while wy is just apologizing to her, that would suck for yeosang, your partner begging to be forgiven by the person currently hurling insults at you? 😭 so wy always wanted to avoid that, he wanted to tell her on his own time at his own pace but then it happened unexpectedly and everything just went out of his control. so the moment yn even tried to be nasty towards ys, wy had to stop it and he did it by being nasty to her instead and he def fucked up with that but its a tricky situation for all of them really because wooyoung cares about both of these people. yn is his best friend but yeosang is his boyfriend and it was hard to get out of it without one of them ending up hurt😭

[machianery]

assorted soto thoughts go here!

i took a good couple days to go through the story because work and also i wanted to pace myself and i think it really worked out because i spent a LOT of time theorizing about where the plot would take us. i was convinced that peitha would empower us to kill the king or whoever and then double cross us by taking over our body to become new king.

dagda is trans. im 100% on this. the demon in her head when you fight her deadnames her. she is deeply upset by being told to compromise her appearance and true self for the sake of appearing to the world. shes trans.

when we first met her though my theory was she would START to warm up to us but when we were revealed to be hiding a demon in our head she would snap and rightfully try to take us out for putting literally the entire astral ward in danger like that.

and i really liked having a character in the cast who very much did not immediately like us. im almost sad that she DID warm up to us. we need someone to challenge things a bit.

i looove the new title. honestly commander always felt a bit like it only fit because we'd kept it for so long. like it was endearing to still be called that when we only commanded people for a relatively short about of consecutive time. but we have been wayfinding for the whole world for much longer. it fits because it would have fit for years.

i got spoiled to peitha's name when i stood somewhere in the first map and she started talking about her opinions regarding i think the architecture? and her name was in the text box. and then later i got spoiled to her appearance when i went to enter an instance and she appeared in a transluscent form to exposit again. im assuming these are part of a lore collection we'll find later oops.

i definitely understand where people are coming from when they say the wizards are cult-like and they hope zojja doesnt ascend. but i dont think thats what anet is really going for. it seems more like a metaphor for gaining power. you want to help the powerless people so you gain power but now theres a disconnect between you and them. idk though we'll have to see.

did you know the dwarf whose head is being warshipped by skritt is in the dwarven area of map 1. you can talk to him and be like Dont I Know You From Somewhere.

im so fucking glad that the new daily system lets you buy glam charges. im constantly searching for more of those.

some of the new bosses (like one of the two bosses you fight with lyhr in the debate hall) have ffxiv-style stack markers. the reason people are dying is because they arent standing in them. STAND IN THE STACK MARKERS.

the rifts seem pretty flexable tbh. you can farm them in a big train or you can pepper them in when theres no events you wanna do on your current map.

just before the final fight against cerus he goes on about the building youre in and how it was for a god to autonomy and how the king killed him. the bad guy KILLED his subjects' AUTONOMY. like. how more on the nose can you get lol i love it.

[winderlylandchime]

THE MAN MADE HIMSELF A SHIRT. I REPEAT THE MAN MADE HIMSELF A SHIRT! That was why he took my markers earlier today! And i had the audacity to think he’d be normal and that the mind map paper was the worst of it all. He took a white shirt and wrote with a sharpie ’Team Brian’ on it. He said he even watched youtube videos to learn how to like stitch it in but gave up after he hurt himself with a needle. He made 3 extra shirts, 2 for our parents that he express sent to them and one for me. He wrote a note with the package to our parents that said ‘if you love me, you’ll wear it’ So I cannot wait to see how that goes (fr imagine getting that sent to you, just a shirt and a note.) And the best(?) part of it all is he wore the shirt to the damn doctor check up! I almost forced him out of it but then at the last second thought to myself ‘for the content..gotta let him be dumb for the people on tumblr, they would want me to do it.’ (At this point I’m just going with the drugged up idiot flow) The doctor took one look at him when he walked into the office and sighed. I forgot that they had to deal with him for two days during his new found love, so i have no clue what all he put them through. And he tried to ignore it at first but my brother kept pulling at his shirt and smiling at him so the doctor went ‘(brothers name) i see youre in the arts and crafts part of your obsession..’ and all my brother said was ‘bro…i mean Doctor Bro, you have no clue. I am stressed! I am tired! I stayed up all night thinking. Nobody cares about my feelings. Nobody cares about what I have to say and think, i have no one in my corner. And now the worst of all, he ran off with a kazoo player! Do you know how dumb that is?!’ The second my brother looked away, the doctor looked at me and mouthed ‘kazoo?’ And I mimicked a violin and the guy had to cover up a laugh. I feel like the doctor is cursing at HIPAA cause if i was him, id want everyone to know about this dumbass at my work. I will report back when my parents get the package (should be like two days or so). He asked at the post office if they will receive it in less than a week ‘because it is important, very, very important! Like life or death situation’ and then he panicked that they’d think he is sending something illegal so he went ‘it’s shirts! Like this one’ *shows his shirt* and then idk what went through his head because he went ‘it’s from a show I’m watching. I swear im not just being weird about Brians’

Dear sweet anon, I was settling in with an afternoon coffee on the couch to do some work on my tablet and your message popped up before I turned on my work DND (otherwise every notification I get is like 👀 surely someone reblogging this this is more important that the thing I am literally paid to do, you know how it is). And I’m so glad that I saw this before I “hunkered down” for some paperwork. Blech.

Nobody cares about my feelings. Nobody cares about what I have to say and think, i have no one in my corner. OH BROTHER ANON you have tens of people in your corner. We DO care about your feelings and one day you will know.

The arts and crafts part of his obsession! I die. He’s going to get an etsy or redbubble store before this is over and start selling fanart phone cases (not a jab, I have a fanart phone case!).

So about HIPAA. HIPAA only applies to healthcare information and identifying information. So for therapists, that’s basically everything (although I will frequently say a client recommended a TV show to me because that is not healthcare information [uh your brother’s qaf obsession would be though] and it’s not identifying). And HIPAA doesn’t apply to consulting with other medical professionals without identifying information (so I could say to a fellow therapist “I have a client who ripped his stitches after surgery due to excitement about a TV show, my own bar for how normal this is is a bit fucked, should I be concerned?”) So I can absolutely guarantee that your brother’s doctor is at the very least telling his fellow doctors about your brother. I promises you they are in the break room laughing about this.

IAN PLAYS A KAZOO. Sorry if this shows up in a fic of mine in the future… this is very Brian coded. No offense to kazoo players. I’m sure they are a lovely bunch who do not deserve to be grouped in with Ethan.

[intertexts-moving]

HHHHHHHHHHH

so funny story i saw that post you made some time ago when you were liveblogging the cloak scene, the "did it hurt" scene and it significantly changed my view

also ive never looked at their second meeting that way before. i have many thoughts re: first conversation, first interaction (? is it an interaction when you try to flirt with a stranger up the banister and they ignore you?,,, asking for a friend), but never paid much attention to the ehem conVENIENT "you fall i catch" thing beyond how weirdly interesting it is. since wkx has no romantic/platonic/personal-anything intention at all at that point, but subconsciously is very much drawn to the guy still. but yeah actually, this is kind of spot on. HH oh god fuck im not going to be normal about this. i thought i was insane when i clocked that their first conversation, when wkx starts talking about that butcher and about how it must be impossible for someone to have that level of skill as zzs being in disguise without any traces of it at all suggests, has so many layers already. hes speaking there as if he has perceived zzs without realizing it. perceived him as this guy who has basically made himself into a myth (like wkx himself!) and as this thing completely unattinable for him, a man mirroring him down to his soul and living a life he can only dream of. the yearning!!! ughghguhgg. the complete lack of self-awareness of it!!!! the hilarity of the situation because wkx is right, and he is literally only following a gut instinct, and he has no idea!!! i thought i was overthinking it a little. im glad im not alone there, seeing things in their first interactions that, without ever really being talked about, ripple deep into the story??

and oh a mutual tag! thats a great idea im going to do that too. siren is very much fine, what would you like me to tag you as?

YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!! yeah yeahyeah ive been thinking abt this all day actually.. like. the subconscious recognition. the like. the inherent understanding the two of them have even b4 they know each other!!! first thing zzs ever thinks abt wkx is the "somehow, in this vast sea of strangers, he still found someone who understood." the first reaction he pulls out of wkx is that hey. huh. i was right? moment when he hears him echo that he was sunbathing. & its so indicative of how they continue on out from there- iirc, wkx never tells zzs he's the ghost valley master. zzs never actively tells wkx about the nails. or any of the other shit they have going on. its the. silent hunch & feeling things out & recognition... like fumbling around in a dark room except they find the light switch every time first try.

& YEAH i havent thought abt it that way b4 but u are SO right... the inherent hilarity of wkx just. really just making fifty educated guesses in a row about zzs and each one of them hitting spot on. the way that yeah the only reason that it. Works. is bcos they genuinely are mirrors of each other& all the things they see abt the other map back onto themselves too..

also GOD. i think abt the cloak scene & wkx's way of interacting w/ zzs so much.. this is. probably bcos i'm disabled (re: chronic fatigue & illness etc.) & i've had variously disabled friends & like... idk. i recognize it!!! the way he is like. "okay. i'm treating you like normal i'm not gonna be weird about it i'm gonna try not to make you uncomfortable about it. but nevertheless if you're in pain i'm going to help you in the most straightforward way possible. idiot. just because i dont treat you like you're glass doesn't mean i'm gonna let you hurt. just because your body is slowly running down like a broken machine doesn't mean i'm gonna treat you like you're made of glass. i want to do whatever i can for you though ok?".....makes me froth at the mouth NFNSDFKSDFD.

[hiding-in-the-vault]

hi im the hk insp au person again,, i just wanted to share just some more of my au if thats okay with you

https://imgur.com/a/L4AVTir (All my unofficial works and also some old designs that didnt work out in case anybody would be interested)

https://imgur.com/a/TNjocDK (Tommys and sapnaps design woohoo)

i hope you like it and please drop some thoughts if you have any :))

also an au notice; not entirely a hollow knight au just HEAVILY inspired by it (hence why its called rogue au in the imgur titles lmao) but i still wouldnt mind if people called it a hollow knight au

btw; you got dream and george right last time, i was surprised because he does in fact live in a very mossy grove (its Mossy Decay in the map), always hides in the shadows and is VERY protective of his little place. when tommy first met dream he wandered a bit too deep in mossy decay and was ambushed by dream, nearly making it out alive

for george, he does in fact like napping a lot around Hills of Mildew (on the eastern side of the map) inside his own hut and doesnt really care about anything and only goes outside to stretch his legs and look at the horizon

and ill also add some lore & funfacts

nobody has ever dared to go in "The deep", only some have tried but few have returned and those few were never the same 😵

theres an arena in barkals, people bet money and fight to the death for it, that's where Dream met techno! while techno was watching dream fight in the arena, he was impressed by his agility and strength and decided to challenge him to a duel outside of the arena. obviously, techno beat dream and thus begun their playful rivalry

ok i swear this was all i just really like to ramble abt stuff ty and bye❤❤❤

WOO!!!! First off, I really love your art style. All the pen lines, especially in some of the older art, it's awesome. I wish I'd do more stuff like that

Anyway, I love these guys. The fire head design is sooo cool. Idk if its just your style or if it looks a certain way for a reason, but it reminds me of autumn leaves and sticks. Which feels apt, for something so nature-themed. A skrunkly guy, I bet he thinks he's the coolest kid on the block. I'd like to hear the thoughts behind those eyes xD

And Tommy feels so sitting. He's a Big man™ and he's got Belts and Such™, Dont Mess With Him !!!11!1!!!! And then you see those big goofy eyes <3 Yep, you're very intimidating and cool, Tommy~ Also him losing his wings reminds me of osmp. That there is one slightly above-average guy who cannot fly. He doesnt NEED to fly, he is simply built different. #trust

Other arts

Map!! I love maps. Big map fan. I bet Tommy likes "The Junk". (if he can get past Dream to make it that far, anyway :eyes:) or at least the name, idk. its funny.

I don't have much to say about the others, besides that they're very fun to look at. I love seeing the thought process behind designs. Crying at George v.1 looking like a waiter djkfhskfd

Speaking of Dream. Ahahehehh I was right >:D It's the vibes, man. The vibes are there and they work so well with these two. If c!Dream and c!George were to be in a hollow knight inspired world, that is simply what they would be doing, I don't make the rules. And hey, that means your character design did its job :D Pog

I'm also always in favor of any idea regarding a fighting arena. Dream would do numbers there, I'm sure. Glad to see the friendly rivalry exists <3

I don't know if you plan on writing anything or just drawing stuff, or just vibe, but I love this concept and I hope you continue it :D

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

Any guesses as to what Rantaro's talent could be?

IM SO GLAD YOU SENT THIS ASK ANON I just got to his body discovery and I need a distraction. I have a few!! This set is ordered from least to most likely:

No ultimate talent: unlikely that they would hype this guy’s talent up for a whole game only for him to not have one without any foreshadowing, but still possible. I think this would most likely be the case in one of my end game theories where none of them are actually ultimates and it’s all fake.. somehow…. Though at this point I’ve mostly put aside that theory for a couple reasons (one big one being that Kiibo is very much a robot, can’t really fake that with memory manipulation)

Ultimate navigator: This one’s another weak guess, I think. He’s very perceptive and good at reading people, so maybe that translates to navigating open seas? Or otherwise difficult to map places? Also, he has what looks like a big compass on his sweater, what’s that about? I also used to think that his necklace was a Boatswain which I now know is not the case. Regardless, if he is the ultimate navigator, I’m picturing him as a ship captain.

Ultimate soldier: I haven’t seen the inside of Rantaro’s lab yet, but the outside of his lab, the door, haunts me constantly. It has a lot of violent warlike imagery (dark red colour, weapons and barbed wire, etc). Also, his necklace IS A little dagger, which also fits. I’m not too sure about this one since Mukuro is already the ultimate soldier, but if Shuichi AND Kyoko can both be the ultimate detective I think it could still work. Who knows, maybe Rantaro was part of Fenrir lol

Ultimate (bounty) hunter: THIS is what I actually think Rantaro’s talent is. And I do mean this as Human hunter, not animals. I have a somewhat elaborate endgame theory relating to this. In short: the other 15 ultimates grouped together to save the world from the incoming apocalypse (project gopher) but failed. The outside world became a wasteland, and the remaining public blamed them and wanted vengeance against them for their failure, starting the ultimate hunt. At the head of the ultimate hunt was Rantaro, and ultimate himself who felt the same guilt as the rest and decided to track down everyone involved in project gopher and capture them before also turning himself in. The 15 ultimates run for a while but end up surrendering to Rantaro and the ultimate hunt, and as punishment for their failure they are all put into a killing game with their memories wiped. Rantaro is either put in also as punishment or alternatively as a warden (alternate title, Ultimate Warden) to watch over the killing game, like a mastermind who was never hiding to begin with. But the monokubs fucked up the memory wipe so bad he also got caught in it and didn’t care to correct it cause it made it all more interesting anyways.

I really like this idea, though there’s a few problems. He seems genuinely nice in chapter 1, especially in his free time events. He is really worried that his talent could make everyone else hate him (though this might just make this all more tragic). I think he had good intentions but might have been corrupted somehow. Also, on a meta level, this is fairly similar to Maki’s talent, and although there’s been overlap like this before (Kyoko and Shuichi, or English Hifumi and Toko for example) bounty hunter and assassin or just barely not the same thing, so I don’t know.

Here’s some more that I thought of, mostly as jokes:

Ultimate gamer: he really liked danganronpa 1 and 2, that’s why he’s so aware of what’s going on in the prologue

Ultimate eboy: just look at him

Ultimate influencer: just look at him

Ultimate fisherman: idk what to tell you I joked about this one time and now every time I think about water-based or water-adjacent activities I think about Rantaro

Ultimate cowboy: he sometimes speaks with a slightly noticeable southern accent?

Ultimate amnesiac: he’s very good at this

Ultimate older brother: He’s so nice, calm, and collected (at least on the surface) and I really found his free time events relaxing. I also know from outside sources that he has sisters. I love hanging out with him. I miss him everyday (UNLESS HES ACTUALLY STILL ALIVE?? 🤔🤔）

[boethiahsboytoy]

1 thru 9 for ivrasi (hope i spelled that right) from the ldb questions OR all the background ones for varla (who im very normal about) pls and thank :3

I did both sets, bc I love rambling about my funky little dudes :D Thank u !!!!

For Ivrasi:

1) Were they trying to cross the border? Why?

She was, she was coming home from a trip to Morrowind where she assassinated two high-ranking Thalmor officials. She wasn't caught where the player character is implied to have been yoinked in the game (not sure where she was I'll look at a map later), but she was dragged off to Helgen for execution.

2) Do they follow Hadvar or Ralof? Why

Hadvar!! She's a Dunmer born and raised in Windhelm's Gray Quarter, she trusts a Stormcloak as far as she can throw one.

3) Do they pick a side in the Civil War?

Y'know I don't think she would??? But idk if that's bc of her personally or me thinking that sounds boring as hell in game.

4) How do they feel about Tullius and Ulfric on a personal level?

I'm not sure about Tulius tbh, but she doesn't think the Empire has Skyrim's best interests at heart so she wouldn't trust him very much because of it. Whether or not she Hates Him I'm not sure because he seems like he's good at acting fucking normal at least. As for Ulfric she loathes him.

5) Do they kill Paarthurnax? Why?

She wouldn't, she has no use for killing him. He helped her fight off Alduin when he attacked at the Throat of the World, and he's been kind to her the entire time he's known her. I don't know how affectionate she'll feel towards him just yet, but she's definitely friendly towards him.

6) How do they feel about Delphine and the Greybeards?

She's not a fan of how bossy Delphine is but doesn't hate her. Dislikes how much she wants Ivrasi to kill Paarthurnax and because she Doesn't Do That it sort of sours whatever relationship they had. As for the Greybeards she appreciates them for explaining things to her. But she also doesn't like how they act like being Dragonborn is Her Only Purpose. She's more than her destiny and tells them to treat her like it.

7) On a scale of 1-10, how much do they hate the Thalmor? The Empire?

Uhhh pretty high on both counts tbh. Exact number goes from like 8-10 depending on how unhappy she is whenever u ask her.

8) What do they do at the war meeting? How does it go? Do they maintain neutrality?

Ivrasi is not Good At Politics. But she's good at being threatening. She takes an opportunity to scare Ulfric into being less...like Himself, lmao, telling him that if he doesn't start treating non-Nords better he'll have to see if his Thu'um is as strong as hers. She ends that fun little speech by telling Tulius and Elisif that she isn't their pawn just because she hates Ulfric, and they get the message. The Greybeards r just thankful Vulon agreed 2 sit this one out.

9) How do they feel about their position as Dragonborn? Do they embrace the role? Does it terrify them? Do they take advantage of it?

She has very mixed feelings about it. On the one hand she embraces it, but really it's only because Somebody needs to stop Alduin and not because she Likes it. Ivrasi enjoys the power it gives her but it scares her too, and she's always worried about loosing herself to her Dragon...instincts?? Idk. It's very stressful to her, and more than once she confides in Vulon that she wishes someone else had been stuck with this role, but she's also glad it's her because she knows herself and knows she can do this. Even if it's terrifying and even if it feels lonely.

And for Varla!!!! :D

1) Is this character from their race's home province/territory? If not, what is their relationship with the region? Do they feel a connection to it?

He is! I've yet to pick out where exactly in Skyrim he's from, but he is From There. He loved his home very dearly. It hurts more than he can convey knowing that it gets destroyed, and even in Apocrypha he desperately wishes he had a home to go back to :( He is Very connected to it.

2) Where did they grow up? A city? A village? Isolated, in the wilderness? What was it like to leave?

A large city! Leaving was terrifying and meant abandoning it to the invading Atmorans, but it was either that or death.

3) What was their childhood like? Who raised them? Do they have siblings?

Tbh I haven't thought too much about this. I do know he's an only child, but I don't think he has a really meaningful relationship with his parents. They raised him! They weren't particularly cruel, but they also weren't nurturing. He resents them a bit for it but doesn't outright hate them. He's sad when he realizes they would have been killed, although he doubts they would have been fond of his worship of Hermaeus Mora.

4) If they are an adventurer, why did they choose that life? Did they choose it at all?

He is Not an adventurer, nor would he choose to be XD

5) Do they worship any gods? Who? How do they feel about the gods in general?

I think he'd really only worship Mora! He thinks as long as the Gods don't severely fuck with Nirn too much then they're alright.

6) What are their interpersonal relationships like? Are they close with many people?

Hes never been very good at socializing; he doesn't pick up on cues very well and tends to either ramble nonstop or just be awkwardly silent. As a result he doesn't have many friends to be close to :( There are probably some Seekers he gets along with though!

7) What's their relationship with their family like? Do they have one?

Strained. He knows his parents would disown him if they found out he worships Mora, and that objectively they aren't that great. But he wishes they were so tries to keep a connection with them.

8) What guilds do they join? Are they committed to those guilds, or are they mostly in them for the benefits?

I dont really kmow what guilds he Would join tbh, especially as he's not really a protagonist of any game or anything...there's probably an architects' guild or union or Something like that for his city that he was a part of! Maybe like.....wizard...things??

9) Are they a vampire/lycanthrope? Did they choose to become one? Would they reverse it, given the chance?

He wouldn't be, and I don't think he'd be offered the choice to be. If somehow he Did become a vampire or lycanthrope I'm sure he'd be able to figure out how to fix it on his own!

Thank you for the questions these were really fun!!!

[blackvail22]

9/25/23

10:25am -

i just had my first appointment with my new psychiatrist? i think thats the word. i got diagnosed with BED (binge eating disorder), and ive been saying for YEARS that i had it, and no one would help me. its been 9 years since i first went to a doctor and told them about my eating habits; they didnt help me. i had an obvious ed, and im glad im finally getting the help i need.

my relationship with food is severely complicated. im obsessed with my weight and the calories im intaking, but i cant stop... binging. and the fact i have fat on my body makes me want to throw up, nd every time i notice it, it makes me feel like my insides are being scratched over and over. my fear of purging is the only reason i dont...

a month ago, i was talking with my counselor, and she asked me if ive ever been screened for adhd. i told her no, but i can tell her yes!! my new doctor did a screening thing for adhd, and i have it. shes referring me to somewhere to get a more in-depth test to see what type of adhd and the severeity of it.

i told my mom all of this, and she seemed upset. i dont understand? shes been so rude to me lately... i mean, she always is.. but it feels like she changed? shes so bitter, and shes being like homophobic 😭😭 out of nowhere LIKE WHAT PROMPTED U TO BE LIKE THIS? i SWEAR on everything, being a chronic facebook user ruined her. she wasnt like this before facebook LMAOO shes so sad. but, all well!

im going to try my best to clean my room again. i NEED to get my shit together!! its so embarrassing how messy it is. i have to focus on doing it. i have to do it today; i have no choice!!

10:17pm

news flash: i didnt clean my room. whos surprised? im going to try and get it together before i go to bed because i have to... i have or else ill feel like im letting my boyfriend down lol

yk idk why but being friends and flirting w somsone is so much different than dating them. its insane!

i didnt mention this before but im being put on a different medication that targets bed and adhd and it also helps depression. i have to do a bunch of testing before i take it, though, because its a controlled substance

im afraid of facing my past. i know that i was a fucked up kid, but seeing HOW fucked up i am is... terrifying. like i read through a few of my old roblox messages and woah!!! i was living a double life, holy shit! obvi... i used a fake name, fake age, and some of the stories i would tell belonged to my sister. ill forever be regretful for the way i was back then... it makes me think, though... did i ever really change?

i had this girlfriend named .... lets call her juju. she lived on the other side of my country, and we met because we both ran fan accts for a youtuber on insta. i became ... obsessive? quickly. i feel sorry for her, but i was 12 and she was nearly 16, so... she easily couldve cut me off once she found out my age lmao. idk, i kept trying to find ways for her and i to meet in person because i was so excited to meet her online. she broke up with me, and i made another instagram and pretended to be someone else for a while.... aka i catfished her. i didnt show her photos of anyone else, just used the name "katrina" like i used to. i got her to talk abt her exes and then she talked abt how she recently broke up w someone and how crazy they were. i knew then that my behavior wasnt normal. i didnt understand the boundaries i was crossing.

am i all that different now? i used his snap maps to see when he's at his dad and when hes at his moms or at school. when i planned on moving down there, i looked for apartments that were nearby his primary home. i attenpted to make an acct to pretend i was someone else and see if he would lie to me abt info abt his life. i didnt finish it.... i got like the ick from myself and was thinking abt how crazy i was.

i try my best to not be ... stalker-like. i wouldnt follow someone throughout their day to see where they are, who theyre with. i wouldnt use it to harm him, and if he didnt want to see me or talk to me, i wouldnt force him to by showing up to his house or texting him off the number i give to weirdos.

im getting tired. its 10:37p now, and i keep like closing my eyes every once and awhile inbetween sections.

i think the last thing i feel i need to rant abt is how i told my dad i have binge eating disorder and for dinner when i told him i didnt care what he got me, HE GOT ME FOOD FOR A FAMILY OF 4. he looked me in the eyes and said, "two cheeseburgers, 16 chicken nuggets, 10 cheese sticks, and a milkshake incase u get hungry later" when he KNOWS i have a habit of eating a lot of food in one sitting.

i feel gross from how much i ate today, and im still wanting to eat more.

being told "u can reverse everything thats wrong w you if u just lost weight!" and then having those same people ENFORCE ur unhealthy eating habits is insane

like, do u rlly want to help me? or do u want to just berate me for the hell of it?

okie song song time

this song is so ... relateable. typical pop song but its so good 2 me

[volinare]

I had a second dream that I dont remeber all of but i woke my self up because my torso got bitten by a crocodile and I just didnt feel like dealing with that.

For most of it I was at this woman's house and it was her daughter's birthday and the vibes were just....... a bit creepy. And she was trying to set me up with this guy who was very tall.

There was a cabinet full of food that was kind of interestingly shaped. And then it was time for cake, every one got a different kind. The little girl was like. Really into the cake she got.

the first dream i had i didn't think i remembered that well till i started writing it down:

there was this fast food joint? it was like... a McDonald's but also a steak and shake.

I was walking around it because I got zapped out of my car at an intersection and then it somehow made it in line and was holding up the line. The worker (A) was like 'go get your car.' so i walked around inside then looped out side but couldn't find it. I kept wandering around but couldn't even find the drive through.

sorry this map is. bad. but after looping around I ran into B, who was a man with writing on his face like in a sort of splat on the bridge of his nose. It looked pretty cool and he wasn't upset at me for running into him so.

Anyways so then I look over across the parking lot and theres C, and for somereason im immediately like "oh Magnus archives. I bet they know how to get to my car. But I was like C is NOT going to tell me the truth though. So I pass D and ask them and they're like 'its burned up'. and I was like... hmmm. okay I guess not.

So then i walk over to the road and theres this commotion because someone has lost their suitcase. A girl drives up in a go cart and attempts to flash me but when she pulls up her dress its just the same dress right underneath. they get pulled up three times in quick succession before I'm like. Alright. what are you doing. and when she talks I can tell shes actually like, really young. so. glad she didn't actually flash me. anyways so theres another motorist who's interrupts her and is like 'what do you want' and the guy who lost his suitcase pushes one of the cars aside and is like 'found it!' until that point i did not know why that was why we were here. I see a metal trailer with the impression of a woman's body pressed into the panels.

so i turn and head back towards the the parking lot towards F and see two guys unloading a box from a car. I can tell they want me to help them but also that they are bad news so i turn around and head back towards the door of the restaurant, which you have to buzz to get into.

I kind of on edge so im glad that the second waitress (G) is there to let me in. When I'm inside I round the corner and see what I immediately know to be... God? in this odd little fictional world. Which is like, if danny deveto was a bit taller and had beady hamster eyes like that jukebox the ghost song. He was just sitting on a stool. then the dream ended.

the shaded blue part is the fucking liminal drive through that my car was stuck in. Supposedly. I could only see it through the windows while I was inside the building and it was also inside the building, but i never saw MY car there. Just other peoples cars. And then when out side I could feel that there was something there, but not like actually place them at all.

When I saw the guy i immediately thought of this meme: