#imma literally perish when this comes out

[ladychandraofthemoone]

Oki now I'm curious about your Alfred (on totally normal and not simp wise levels) like does he always need to do deals and how does his lamp work and does he usually carry it with him?? Etc etc I need to know everything abt him pls 👀👀💚💚

All righty!! Imma be rambling a lot so first off I totally love him as well like he’s so messed up in a positive way OK well yeah I was mainly inspired by this Thomas fan film called MYSAERY-The Engine Prideful by Tines Sensahthe(where Alfred gets them glowing eyes) on the downfall and prices of greed, pride jealousy and envy of him being able to grant wish, anything you can imagine and desire. and then he wishes he wants, with it getting lost in translation or too straightforward it’ll happened instantly but at the price of him having your soul in five years or if you die earlier or within those five years/before they end he’ll come and drag you to hell.

The wishing tunnel is that he was literally the spirit of it and I like that idea so much so it’s basically the same concept except he’s one of “Proteus” ‘successors’ cause Proteus (he’s kinda like Gabriel) is an entity who came around the time Lady appeared and he’s kind of messed up entity who’s thinks humanity should be erased and recreate the universe again where he and Lady avoid each other, but he screws both Alfred and Kyle up really badly though they handled it differently albeit terribly more so on Alfred’s side.

Proteus comes in around the time Alfred gets booted out of Sodor for his behavior and nearly killing Cecil among other things(he’d doesn’t try and kill Gordon and Henry here cause he’s friends with Gordon cause family issues and lner solidarity go brrr until everything falls apart) and offers him magic and abilities to get payback for a price of course but then lady steps in and she’s like nope and as punishment, she puts Alfred in the tunnel so he doesn’t cause any harm but Proteus’s magic is still inside him so he acts like a jinn which is a big inspiration for his version cause he’s the opposite of Kyle so he’s a foil to him in their views on life and letting folks live or die and unlike Kyle who’s invisible to the naked eye and only seen by other spirits and that Kyle can’t really grant wishes while Alfred can be seen but he can only do deals and grant wishes to actually get out of the tunnel for a certain amount of time till he is forced to return cause he’s bound to it and later the teakettle he’s in.

Alfred’s for his part agrees with a majority of proteus’s views that they are selfish and this isn’t helped by people/humanoids whi when they find him got many greedy self-fulling demands that he will grant despite the consequences of their actions (he gets a thrill to see them fail and burn to the ground) plus a majority of the time they perished before the 5 years end and he gladly swoops in for his end of the bargain cause they’ll never escape if they even try and back out. On terms on how he gets along with the others he’s got rather mixed loyalties with Proteus cause he senses that he’s hiding some secrets well so is he he’s good at reading folks like that, he gets along well with Godred over bonding being trapped in one place for so long even when they fight and argue, torn between nervous and frustrated around Timothy he gets unnerved by him and got the worse relationship with Lucy,Kyle and Lady as they’re constantly telling him off over his treatment of the souls he keeps locked and trapped in jewelry(like the beads broach and earrings he wears)where Lady offend visits him and judges the souls he has so that they could peacefully pass on if they wish much to his annoyance though he’s too intimidated to do much he’s tried before it didn’t end well for him so sly remarks then.

Lucy is the Grimm Reaper, shed’s like Death from Puss and Boots Alfred’s messing with fate he’s taking advantage of others cause it makes him feel powerful and he’s doesn’t care about how harmful his actions are,she’s constantly trying to cut him off a few legs and both make arguments over how the other is literally burnt up and rotting (the glowing green and shadow hands Alfred has is from Lady, a punishment and warning while the scars are from fights he’s gotten overtime). Kyle, wowie they don’t get along Kyle will jump him whenever he has the chance cause Alfred and Godred kidnapped Stanley(narrow gauge/msr his boyfriend) and Alfred has tried to convince Kyle that’s all humans are terrible, cause they both fought in wars and that’s how Kyle perished right by the hands of humans (and how humanoids were more likely to be sacrificed and mistreated in humanoid au) and Kyle focuses on the positive aspects of life and he’s treated with much more respect and loved but Alfred constantly reminds how he’s bound to the lucky lamp and unable to be heard or seen by anyone they throws jabs at each other and poke holes in their views and he and godred constantly calls him proteus much to his annoyance and anger.

For for the lamp or teakettle part, he does need to carry it around but he mainly has others do it for him cause he’s kindave petty and mainly cause of the deal he and Thomas did cause Thomas was in a near-death experience but he can’t teleport around like Kyle does with the Lucky Lamp much to his chagrin but hey babysteps with unlearning unhealthy mannerisms.

[imnotreal-png]

>:) -- Entry 1

OK i just smoked a joint after i wrote the date and now im kinda chillin but imma still yap on dis hoe.

I am a loser. Like a huge loser, okay? Like im not dumb or wtv, i may have reached a weird and insane level of self awareness, but im just as much of a loser as anyone else.

I keep catching myself trying to people please and overstepping my boundaries and justifying it with "oh everyone else does it, so what, its normal" like ok dumb bitch that doesn't make it okay, get a grip.

But i will be yapping away abt alot of stupid bullshit i deal with and stupid things make me sad. I am very well aware that I am irrational, but these are things i feel in those moments that i always hold in because i don't want people 2 see that weak side of me. It's embarrassing and it's not me.

In truth, i have nooo idea what i'm doing. I have 0 clue on where i'll be in the future. I didn't think i'd make it this far and not on some suicidal shit (idk if u can say that word here, oops.), i just genuinely thought that i'd somehow perish?? Like i wasn't really real in some weird way. I just didn't exist. Even though i was always the center of drama or the cause of all things chaotic, i was always misunderstood. god that's so fucking cringe but hear me out.

I always said shit that i believed was clear enough to be understood and yet it wasn't. Even my tone apparently has been rude this entire time. But no one would actually tell me how i come off, they just ate it up in silence and then spaz on me. Even now i don't really understand because i truly believe i am very clear on what im saying. Yet it's still...not seen the way im trying to show it? Idk if im making any sense bruh but whatever. Maybe im narcissistic but no one understands my brain the way i attempt to express it...or i guess how i see it. Idk i guess im just frustrated that no one understands me or gets my brain.

Also it's super cringe when people tell me im mature for my age. Literally eat my shit. actual ick. get away from me.

I hate my mom. She hates me too but she hates me bc I'm not the pussy she wishes she was when she was my age. She's the most childish person i know. I genuinely do not care what she thinks of me whatsoever. She's just power hungry and immature. Actually, I don't even hate her, i just hate that she gets to have all this power over me. I just want my freedom, thats it. She can hate my lifestyle or whatever the fuck, as long as im not living with her. At the end of the day, im truly content with who i am as a person and my moral compass etc, she cant affect that. I just need to have my own space and leave her household to finally be free and actually experience life in a comfortable and more peaceful way. I guess that's all i can say rn. I just wish she would respect my boundaries and stop treating me like im her competition and she'll always be superior. She won't and i cannot wait for the day she finally see's that lol.

!! super irrational moment alert !!

LMAO this is super cringe but like when i started music i put "listen 2 my moozik" in my bio bc we say muzik in albanian but americans wud have 2 read it as moozik to get it right + its funny? Ever since i started rlly getting exposure and performing out there, all these NON SLAVS/BALKANS have started putting it in their bio's 🙄 like be fr, its sooo obvious (at least to me). And now some of these mfs i've interacted w startes stealing my lingo and the way i type [this isn't how i type when i txt friends. its worse and i shorten everything in a miserable way cuz its funny] and it's cute at first but now mfs on social media posting the way i do and talking the way i do. [insert side eye bc yeah] and it's kinda cringe cuz they're actually rlly shallow and mainstream people, they just look like they trying 2 hard to be quirky. lol.

im probably tweakin tho idk.

i wish i grew up with art. i wish my parents had that and were able to introduce it to me. I feel like a fraud when i try to be creative and do things. Even with making music. As much as i enjoy it and love it and it really does make me happy, it feels fake. I can't play any instruments, i can't sing, im far from a good writer, fuck if know anything abt music theory...i literally just click buttons and make sounds on my computer lol. I didn't grow up indulging in art and creativity, i was actually always super bad at it. I wish i had a deeper connection with it. I wish i understood it better. I wish i expressed it better. I wish my ideas were my own. I want to be able to create something that is truly mine without feeling like im a fake.

UHHHH so imma just come on here and vent whenever i feel like i have something i need 2 say. This is intended for the void, if u come across it...cringe.

[justasimplesinner]

Hi! Can i have the dork squad (or...if is too much just jon) with a very tochy s/o? Like his s/o likes lo play with they hair and so? Thank you!!!!!!

imma have to skip jervis darl because i dont know enough about him to write his character. i just know enough not to like him all that much. not my cuppa tea, this man

Jon with a very touchy feely s/o hcs:

he is quite literally like a cat when it comes to recieving affection. his pride doesn't let him enjoy it sometimes, especially in public, and he may act like he doesn't enjoy it all that much, but you can literally feel him melting into you

you could cup his chin in your hand and his head would literally fall into your palm and he'd close his eyes and- you know what, let me show you 

at first it gets some getting used to, of course, and you have to respect his boundaries. you have to build his trust and the easiest way to do it is to simply always ask for permission/make your intentions clear before touching him and understanding the concept of personal space

more often than not, he'll get a little flustered from how open you are about your affections for him. heck, he might even get snappy and act grumpy, but you've honestly never heard him tell you to fuck off because he never really wants you to fuck off

he loves the way you always snuggle into him and wrap your arms around him tight, like you never wanted to let go. he has never felt more wanted than when you just come up and hug him

you two have developed a habit of always subtly reaching out whenever you pass each other. be it a simple pat on the hip or your hand tracing up his arm, it's become a second nature to just touch each other in passing

won't admit it, but will never get enough of the butterfly kisses you place over his face and neck. he tries to act stoic but on the inside, he's curling into a little ball

and there's something about the way you... hold him to your chest and... nuzzle his hair and... kiss his forhead... it makes him feel so small. so safe. your touch became the source of comfort for him and he will always seek you out whenever he's stressed. he might try to act subtle but all it takes is one look for you to pull him close to you and cuddle him until he feels better

Ed with a very touchy feely s/o hcs:

he needs you in his life. i'm serious. he's been pushed away and berated by everyone he ever loved, and then suddenly you prance into his life and touch him and hug him and kiss him and praise him - if he does not recieve affection from you every hour of the day, He Will Quite Literally Perish

greedy as fuck, "give him a finger and he'll bite your whoe arm off" type of guy. after every kiss, he's chasing your lips for more. every time you try to let go of him, he hugs you tighter. every little trace of your fingers on his skin, he's practically whining and begging at your feet the second you stop

physically can't fall asleep without you. the first night he slept in your arms, cuddled up to you, with your soft breathing as his lullaby, was the most peaceful night he ever had. you make him feel safe, protected, loved and he will unconsciously reach out for you whenever you try to move away

once you make him realize that you won't hate him just because he loves you and that he's not a burden to you, he will initiate touches very often. you two are practically inseparable, and it's slowly getting on other rogues' nerves

loves it when you run your fingers through his hair, it makes a shiver run down the whole length of his spine. of course, sometimes he will get prissy about you ruining his hair, but he's quick to forget it the second your hands come to cup his face

once you get him used to your affection, there's no getting out. he's very needy and very fucking clingy and whenever he's not working, he's at your side, giving you puppy eyes just so you touch him

you're the best thing that ever fucking happened to him. honest to god. there is nothing he would replace you with. you've shown him how it feels to love and be loved and he will cling to you until the end of times

[residentlesbrarian]

The Fourth Book I Read In the Dark: Of Expectations and Other Relatabilities

Of Gryphons and Other Monsters by Shannon McGee

Hey, guys, sooooo...this is aaaawwwkward. I wrote 95% of this review when I wrote the other Books I Read in the Dark series for the blog, but the ADHD hit me and COVID was still you know...a thing! So I am gonna post this review, finished of course, OH, but also pay extra close attention to the conclusion alright! Hmm...this is a bit like a time capsule...here are my concentrated thoughts from 6 months ago while I was slightly delirious on books and darkness. So go forth and uh yeah this one is...you can just feel the feral “I haven’t had access to proper internet so I’ve been curled in the corner like Gollum with my books” energy coming off it so...enjoy?

Okay, so yeah, I really didn’t have a reason to end my last review that way I just wanted to, so sue me for injecting a little excitement into a series of posts about me literally sitting in my house reading nonstop for 2 ½ days, my reviews my rules. Back to manufacturing my own excitement shall we!

It’s Day 2! I’ve just finished my last library book, whatever will I do! I could always reread The Neverending Story for the 1,273rd time, but I have a need. A need for GAY! I rack my brain, there has to be a solution. My town is without power, my local library won’t be open, but then it hits me. It’s so simple! It’s meant to be really! Like the universe knew this was coming and it made sure I was prepared! Like a prepper stockpiling mental SPAM for my stimulus needing ADHD riddled brain! I have an entire shelf of books that I haven’t read yet! Way back in Clexacon 2019 my best friend (Lookin at you @justalifelongphase) gave me way too much money from missed birthdays and Christmases all at once before the con started because the world has deemed it impossible for us to live geographically close to one another. Anyway, I went a little book-buying-crazy and have not had the time or opportunity to read any of them since then. Their time has finally come!

I figured after going full whimsy with The Lost Coast and sci-fi superhero with Dreadnought and Sovereign why not take a dip into more traditional fantasy, also this one was first in line on the shelf, yay for not having to actually make a decision! No more dawdling, let's get right into the review!

Unicorn Rating:

Blurb: Taryn always loves and hates gryphon season. She finds the lesser gryphons more cute than anything but the ever present fear that a greater gryphon might be just out of sight is terrifying, and this gryphon season proves to be the one that will change her and her families lives forever! Just let a girl herd her sheep in peace!

Disclaimer: I will try my best to not spoil anything from the book, but my book loving rambles may give more away than a traditional review. Here we go! Ramble time!

Review:

I genuinely enjoyed this book. It took me a bit longer to get through it than the others, but I think that was a combination of three things: A. I was starting to feel the fatigue of reading so much in such a short amount of time. B. Our local Wal Mart had power restored on Day 3 and our entire household went on a trip to buy non-perishable food stuffs and I was like a solitary confinement prisoner being let out into the yard for the first time in months when my phone picked up a wifi signal and it was a bit hard to get back into the swing of reading after talking to other humans, even virtually, that weren’t imaginary or in my head. C. Our power was finally restored on the afternoon of Day 3 so yet again I was inundated with the draw of technology and all of my friend-os I hadn’t talked to, but the book had drawn me in enough I did the most unmillienial thing and left my phone in a different room to charge while I finished this book before going back to the land of technology and interwebs. That should tell you something.

McGee was able to write this story in a way that pulls you in so you care about what happens to these characters and this little mountain town. You learn just enough about the world to understand where they fit within the overall weave of it, but you aren’t given a Tolkein-esc dissertation on the world lore. I felt the worries and the fears. I was concerned when the routines had to change. I mean she made me care about the freaking sheep! Sheep, people! One of the reasons I think this works so well is we are so firmly rooted in the head of our protagonist, Taryn. Imma use that lovely bridge I just built to skip right on over the plot section of the review to get to the characters first, don’t worry we’ll circle back round to the plot. I always do, but I just wanna talk about my newest set of brain babies.

Taryn is a character that, if the title of this post is anything to go by, I found very very relatable. Now I know relatability can be pretty subjective, some people can latch onto something with the all consuming, “It me!” While others just stare on dead eyed not understanding the appeal. I feel like Taryn could be that kind of protagonist. You are either going to really relate to her or you won’t understand where she is coming from at all. I obviously fall in the former category. I was the quintessential middle child, still am really, though my relationship with my parents has shifted now that I’m an adult. More mutual respect and friendship than parent to child. I always did my best to pick up the slack, if ever there was any, and just tried my best to be as little of a burden as possible to my parents. I see so much of that aspect of myself in Taryn and how she sees her place at the farm and even in the town, she has her place and her role, but those expectations are heavy. One of those expectations being that she will inevitably get married and help take over the farm from her parents and have kids to continue the line. The fact she finds the lesser gryphons that flock near the farm far cuter than any of the local boys that she will eventually have to choose from to fulfill that inevitable expectation is just...sad at best and down right tragic at worst. And her family doesn’t help matters either. They won’t let her forget that she will have to settle down with one of these local boys, a boy who would make a good husband and take good care of her and the farm. She knows that, logically, but she also wants to be in love, like her parents, and she just doesn’t feel like that for any of the boys in town. She doesn’t know how to make those two things line up. It’s a struggle between her head, the obligation of what she has to do, and her heart, what she really wants for her future, to be happy in doing what she has to do. Wow, I went off a little bit there, but this was my long winded way of saying I have never read a protagonist that really captured the utter confusion of being raised in a heteronormative environment without it being drenched in internalized homophobia and fear. Protagonists like this seem to always know something is off but just don’t have the words for it so they just hide it because they know it’s “different” and out of the norm, but Taryn is just livin’ her sheep herding life and ain’t got no time for these boy crazy fools. She knows her mom wants her to find a good boy to court her so she can marry someday but she’s still young. She’ll think about that tomorrow, and she just repeats that ad infinitum. The thought that maybe she doesn’t fancy any of the boys because well...girls...never even occurred to her. It's not how things are done in this small mountain town, not because of homophobia reasons, but just stubborn tradition reasons. We are even told there is a gay couple living in town who are staples in the overall dynamics in town, instrumental even, but the idea of having a lineage, being able to pass your land down is so ingrained no wonder poor Taryn was so in the dark about her own probable gayness till it slapped her in the face. As someone who was raised in a medium sized Oklahoma town...girl I feel you. I was 22 and in the middle of Appalacia, way up in the mountains for college when my gay awakening popped up and said “Hello!” Everything that never quite made sense in my life came into perfect clarity. Not quite what happened with Taryn, but the arrival of Aella surely helped, as pretty girls are want to do. Oh look a segue, good, cause I could talk about Taryn for literal hours and I’ve already gabbed about her too much for this review.

Aella, you smooth motherfucker. Like I wish I could possess a quarter of the smoothness that you do. Like I’m lucky to string sentences together around a pretty girl, but here you are just strutting about being the smoothest of smooth. Honestly, I just...I can’t with you Aella. On a serious note though Aella is a character that served as showing Taryn a glimpse at the world beyond her small mountain town, as much as she had no desire to leave, unlike her brother. Nope, sit down, we’ll get to you, Michael! Oh, we’ll get to you. She’s traveled and has stories from all over and she is fairly open about the fact that she only likes girls, but she doesn’t have land, responsibilities, and a family line to continue. She just gets to live her life the way she choses. And y’all know I am a sap for the hard dark characters that are totally softies underneath that rough exterior. I think Aella was a great foil to Taryn and great at showing her what she could have if she was willing to leave, to stretch what she was allowed to wish for, but of course the biggest issue with her wishing for anything was...Michael.

Michael was such an interesting character. I loved him. I hated him. I wanted to hug him. I wanted to punch him. Again as with the town and the people of the town I was so deep seated in Taryn’s head and feelings that her conflicted feelings about Michael and how he was acting became my feelings on the matter. Not enough to not separate a tad and see what was coming or at least try to predict it as I always do when reading, but emotionally I was right with Taryn the whole way. The one thing that really pushed Michael from just a character I was conflicted about to one I really wanna give a swift kick in the nads to, is that he knew. He knew all about Taryn’s absolute lack of romantic inclinations toward any of the boys in town and her doubts that she would ever find someone to love and marry to take over the farm. He was the only person she confided these fears in and he still selfishly followed his own pursuits with little regard to her or her worries. You sir, are a terrible brother and overall a shit human, so sit your ass down and shut your mouth.

The plot for this book was so embroiled with the characters and their journeys that I can’t talk on it much but the twists at the end and the final climax was very satisfying for me and left me excited to dig into the next book. Also something of note that I didn’t talk about in the character section cause I felt it was dragging on a touch, I really only talked in depth on our three biggest players but there is a very colorful cast of side characters ranging from Taryn’s nervous pony to the boy-who-cried-gryphon neighbor no one can stand to the troupe of hunters led by Aella’s mother to Taryn’s best friend Nia, all of whom play important parts in building that sense of caring about the people of this town and the town itself, which in turn made me deeply care about the outcome of the plot at the heart of the story. And the sheep! The god damn sheep!

One thing I do want to say before my final thoughts is that whoever designed the cover of this book in a genius because as I dug into the story I found myself constantly closing it to spout off about theories of what I thought was happening on the cover and what it all meant, I was kind of reader fatigue delirious for most of those theories but some of them I was right! I might have reenacted the Captain Holt “Vindication” gif IRL just because it felt too good not to. I just love when a “cool” cover turns out to be so much more than that once you’re “in the know”. So yeah, now y’all know to pay attention for that.

My final thoughts on this book are pretty positive. I can tell the author is building us toward so much more, hence the name of the series, Taryn’s Journey, and it feels like it. This is only the beginning and I honestly can’t wait to take the next steps with her.

Queer Wrap-up:

Hey it’s me from the future...present...whatever...so, this is when I stopped writing the review six months ago and there is a reason for that. I, kind of, agonized over what to rate this book on the scale. Multiple times having to call my brother and go back and forth just to then repeat the same arguments with myself as soon as I got off the phone. Now why was this such a hard terrible no good awful back and forth well...SPOILER WARNING...seriously anything past this point will be spoiling some character beats for the majority of the book...okay? We understand one another. DANGER ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE...or you know scroll on.

So, Taryn is never confirmed to be queer in the text of this book. Now you would have to be wearing the tightest hetero goggles in known history not to see the heavy HEAVY subtext saying THIS BITCH GAY! It’s basically a full grown elephant painted sparkly rainbow trying to hide behind a dead shrub aka not hiding at all. I so desperately wanted to give this book four of those darling unicorns but in this rare case I just don’t think I can justify it. We have a protagonist that is still figuring herself out, which is amazing that we get to see that and go on the journey with her. Some of the things Taryn does and thinks are queer coded as hell, especially if it involves Aella who is explicitly gay on the page, but Taryn herself never express whether she herself is queer. Which, fair, other really important and traumatizing things were going on and I love that about her as a character, she didn’t meet Aella and suddenly that was all she could think about. Aella, of course, is representation who I’m counting because even though she shows obvious interest (you smooth motherfucker) in Taryn she is so much more than just a love interest and her character isn’t just boiled down to her sexuality. Now in this wrap up I’m also including the doctor and his husband in the town. They are very minor characters but they give us interesting insights into the town and the people. They are accepted and treated well in town even if some do almost, pity isn’t the right word, but they seem sad that they won’t be able to have any kind of legacy or lineage. As I said in the review it’s not homophobia it’s being stuck in your ways and it’s an interesting take.

Links:

Shannon McGee Website

The Storygraph

Okay so this one is a bit of a mess. Pieces of it were written 6 months apart and most of it was written while I was kind of delirious but hey at least I can say it’s honest. I still stand by everything my past self wrote and I still really enjoy thinking and talking about this book and am excited for whenever I get around to reading the sequel to continue on Tayrn’s journey with her. This is a book I probably would never have known even existed without ClexaCon and trolling through artist alley for literally every table that had books on them. I guess, moral of the day is maybe you won’t just find great books on library shelves but on unassuming convention tables too and it never hurts to look. Trust me, I’m a lesbrarian.

Oh bet you thought this post was over. I did the sign off and everything but oh no no! I have some info and such to impart. I am WELL AWARE these reviews have been fairly inconsistent to down right sporadic. Well, this is just a little info dump letting you guys know I am gonna be putting up one more review after this one that I wrote ages ago and I mean AGES (think years, as in multiple) and just never got around to posting and then the old blog is probably gonna be going through a PLANNED dormancy while some pretty big stuff is coming down the pike. You may notice visual changes and other stuff before anything else is announced but just keep an eye out. To quote the Fates from Hercules, “It’s gonna be big!”

Okay now for the actual sign off, I got shit to do! No one look behind the curtain, it’s a surprise!

[emeraldtawny]

Why I love the Kitsune

Okay....so something a little different than my usual fics or shenanigans. I make my favourite characters known quite frequently and, now that his route has been officially announced for Japanese release this year, I wanted to share something I’ve been chipping away at for a hot minute. I love Mitsuhide...like a lot....like, a LOT a lot. And I wanted to share my personal reasons why. If this ain’t your cup of tea, fine by me, but I need to scream about him now that I know I’ll get to romance him in like....a year and a half ;P

~Spoilers ahead~

1. First Impressions

Honestly when I first saw this dude rock up after MC saves Nobunaga from the Honno-ji fire...I didn’t think much. I liked his look: white hair and damn, those eyes! (I’m weak for anime men with gold eyes), but other than that, he wasn’t someone I thought would become my favourite. Especially with the early interactions of Hideyoshi mistrusting him and learning that IRL Mitsuhide betrayed Nobu and caused his death? ...yeeeah, I wasn’t entirely sold.

Mitsuhide was a slow burn for me - I needed to see him in other routes to let him shine, then I could be consumed by the light in his separate stories (ie. birthday, event stories). The moment I realised I was smitten was Masamune’s route. Him being the worst wingman by getting Masa drunk made me laugh so hard because it fit him well: sticking to the shadows and hiding his good intentions behind teasing as he helps his friends. But he also let his more genuine side show in Masa’s Romantic Epilogue, giving MC advice whilst also remaining very much himself and laughing at Masamune’s distress because of how cute she is sdjfsukdgbsdj.

From then on, I was hooked and decided to play Hideyoshi’s route next…..hehe, hehehe, he….it still hurts. I’ll go more into this route in particular a little bit later, but yes, his unrequited love broke me and only made me fall for him harder. Not just from pity because of how much it hurt to see him like that, but because now we know he totally deserves love and happiness for the type of man he revealed himself to be in Hideyoshi’s route. All in all, I was teetering on the cliff for a bit before I was Sparta kicked into the Mitsuhide hole...and have not wanted to move since :3

2. Personality

Phew, okay. Imma split this up into categories just to make it easier for you guys to read and so I don’t ramble and go on tangents.

Teasing, teasing….and more teasing

God, I love this trope so much. Those who hide their true selves behind honeyed words and calculated jokes both make me swoon and make me suspicious - a winning combo to get me invested in them.

For those reading this who are less familiar with IkeSen and need a comparison, think Edgar from IkeRev, except 1. More direct and suggestive teasing, and 2. More (if only slightly) moments of genuineness, like being surprised or taken aback instead of using his smile as a wall like Edgar would do. Even through his teasing, he slips in honesty (in every lie there’s a hint of truth, some say ;3).

While he is teasing and chastising (treating the MC like a child), he does genuinely care about her well-being. He uses teasing as his unorthodox way to let people know he cares for him while still keeping them on their toes about whether he’s telling the truth or not...this is why he’s a kitsune (a trickster fox spirit).

Pragmatic and Composed

It’s mentioned throughout both Hideyoshi’s route and event stories like Make My Heart Spark that Mitsuhide is not one for believing in things like fate or destiny. He’s described as self-reliant and honestly, I can't think of a better term for him. The way he works literally puts him in self-sacrificing positions where he can only work alone, so being capable without having the support of others is a skill he had to master quickly.

He also says things like “honesty can be dangerous”, which is a WHOLE can of worms for possible backstory.

What I like to imagine from this is that he experienced something traumatic, either to himself or someone close to him, where honesty was the cause. He convinced himself deception and leaving as little information in the open as possible was the best option. Hell, it even ties into Mitsuhide’s IRL counterpart, where there is nowhere near as much info on the guy compared to practically every other warlord. He thinks rationally, remains calm under pressure and can even remain teasing throughout...I respect and melt over him for that.

Beneath the wolf skin lies a sheep

I like thinking of Mitsuhide as a sheep in wolf’s clothing. He has to remain intimidating and unapproachable to those around him - even those close to him - so as not to disrupt his ever-scheming plans. But secretly, he has a heart of gold and he still makes it known...it’s just subtle. My personal favourite example is in his birthday story where he lets MC win at hanafuda just so she can win the bet and make her happy….gaah, I’m weak! It always just seems like his teasing remarks and subtle pushes in the right direction are his way of showing his affection, because it’s too dangerous for him to be openly affectionate lest others get swept into his business. A sad thought, but incredibly fitting. He’s also softer than he looks, he knows full well he shouldn’t get close, but you being the sexy, incredibly awesome MC you are can make even Mitsuhide be ensnared in the strings of love that bind his heart ;3

Other screaming about my adoration for the snek man

Just…..help me, he’s so smooth! I love love LOVE the way he talks, the way he’s translated into English just makes my heart go JFSBFSJBFWOUJFNW! He uses phrases like “modesty forbid” and “pray tell”...he just needs to say “perish the thought” and I’ll be even more wrapped around his finger than I already am.

Also, the pet names...I surprised myself with how much I like his use of them, especially him calling MC dear. I LOVE IT SO!! Idk how to describe this one and why it makes me feel things, I just...love being a silly girl, a good girl, a little mouse, a little seamstress and other nicknames sure to arise in the future >:3

Again, I’ll mention how he has a soft spot of the MC as he gradually warms to her and…seriously, it’s illegal to be that sweet, with such a nice smile on your face too. MITSUHIDE DESERVES LOVE AND I WILL GIVE IT TO HIM DAMMIT~!

Final screaming point of why I personally love him: his awareness and how he responds with it. It’s no secret our psychic fox over here is good at reading the atmosphere, and I love when he uses this gift in more tender moments. Picking up when MC is sad or distraught and offering assistance (after teasing of course), and I like to think in a romantic sense, he’d be the type to hold her close and stroke her hair while she just lets out her frustrations. And he’ll take them all, listening quietly and calming her down all the while. GAAAAH, I’m weeeaaakkk~

3. Personal Theories and Favourite Theories I Have Seen

I have speculated about this man a LOT and there’s a couple of theories I wanted to share just because it’s fun to make them and bounce off ideas :3

One I like to think about is his past and how it molded him into the man he is today. Using IRL Mitsu as a guide, he apparently worked as a messenger for a wandering shogun before serving Nobunaga and grew up in a castle bearing his family name. This makes me think that he might be similar to Ieyasu, perhaps being a political hostage at some point in his life. Mistreatment or torture would have worked to make Mitsuhide believe that deception and lies work to conceal his weakness, and how he’s so privy to torture and interrogation techniques.

Another theory is the one relating to his lack of taste. My guess is either a botched poisoning attempt from his work in his adult years, or through torture as a young child while his taste buds were still developing. @deathbyotome did an amazing fic for this called “Taste” on AO3 and I highly recommend reading it, it’s very good.

I’m also intrigued by how they’re going to incorporate Motonari in with Mitsuhide, considering Nobunaga put Mitsuhide in charge of the Oda contingent when war waged between the two clans. So they have history (at least...IRL history), so I’m wondering if that’ll come into play in the future.

~

Okay, I think I’ve rambled enough. Not even sure if people will even read this, but I just needed to expel my love for this man, especially now that we know his route is definite and will be coming. I just seriously, honestly love him and want nothing more than for him to be happy….but we ALL know his route is gonna be angsty as hell and we’re gonna be broken by the end of it. I am ready Cybird, let him break my soul so I can reach him and ease his heart. ….I’m not being dramatic at all bfasjdbafan. Anyway byyye, thanks for humouring me~! :3

[suns-out-sleeps-in]

One Last Time

just in case I get nuked for whatever reason my twitter is https://twitter.com/SunnySideSleeps or if links are still jacked then I’m @SunnySideSleeps

or if you just want writings and don’t want my screaming into the void then follow me on archiveofourown at suns_out_sleeps_in_ramblings

I’m also thinking of setting up a ko-fi soon for writings so eh I really don’t know how this will go but it does suck that Tumblr is shitting itself thanks to @staff and @support because they can’t get rid of a problem without implementing a blanket “solution” when it really only needs a single patch.

And the fact that we still have a neo-nazi problem which I don’t forsee getting fixed soon (or well for that fact)

I don’t think I need to tell anyone this but just in case, this whole NSFW ban is @staff ‘s desperate attempt to get back on the app store after they were deemed “too inappropriate for kids” and removed from advertisers. So @staff thinks that this will work when all it’s done is piss off everyone and all it’s going to do is hurt themselves and it’s users. Literal thousands of people rely on tumblr for payment in some form and some of it happens to involve NSFW content. IMMA BE REAL WITH YOU, CHIEF; THIS WON’T WORK AT ALL BECAUSE Y’ALL ARE BEING SLOPPY!

What this ban should do? 

Ban CHILD pornography, all phrases associated with it and every weird trick pedophiles use to get around being extremely obvious should have been banned from the beginning and the fact that it hasn’t is just sad. @staff get your shit together ffs

Ban pedophiles/MAPS (Minor-Attracted Person, literally just pedophila but they tried to make it a sexuality and it back-fired HARD because of trying to get the “identity” integrated into LGBT+ circles) If you ban the people who make the content, then it won’t circulate nearly as well. Easy solution.

Hateful (read: neo-nazis, racist, predjudiced, etc.) content, once again just everything associated with the movement and involving an expressive desire of killing/deporting people of color, LGBT+, neurodivergent, etc. 

Work to develop an effective modding system that locates key phrases for text and have a real team of people to look for the porn and pictures that violate terms of service.

What this ban has done is go after fanart and other ridiculous things (weirdest one I’ve heard had people show pictures of cats getting flagged) all because of fleshtones and other factors but it’s dumb and it’s not the way to solve the overall problem.

Also, @staff you lied to us and said that you wouldn’t flag sculptures and art like the statue of David and Truth coming out of the well because they were art from a long time ago and are available to the public via internet search, but what did you do? you flagged it. 

Why? Because David has his dick out and Truth is shown with “Female-presenting nipples”. 

@staff why are you like this? 

Congrats, that’s the new meme of the month, you played yourselves.

That’s not even beginning to mention all of the people you’ve shadow-banned as a preemptive strike before possibly banning them. Which, might I say, is so not cool for those that don’t deserve it.

There are so many people that are on this site to talk with their friends and look at art and memes and find themselves a place to belong, but your killing us all by your own hands. At this point you might as well pull the trigger and save us all the trouble of slowly suffocating your own userbase like a sadistic jackass.

@staff if you actually cared about your literal millions of users, you would raise the age restriction of the app to at least 18, do a better job of vetting people when they sign up and make accounts and of the content being put on your site, and listen to us when we say that there is a problem you need to fix and work to fix it in a way that doesn’t hurt innocent people’s content.

We would be fine if you told us that you were shutting the servers off for a hot minute in order to fix the problems mentioned earlier, trust me when I say it would work out much better than whatever “this” whole thing you’ve is. You would be in much higher respect of your users and advertisers if you said to everyone “There’s a problem, so please give us some time to fix it and we’ll be back as soon as we can.”

Otherwise you will see this platform crash and burn, and it will be by your own doing that this site perishes.