#immediately. theyre those people

[quietwingsinthesky]

nap. then. more egg. very important itinerary today.

[airoarts]

Leader and deputy

[Image description: a digital painting of Squirrelstar and Ivypool from Warriors. Squirrelstar is a small dark red cat with green eyes, standing in front of the much taller Ivypool, a gray tabby-and-white cat with blue eyes and many battle scars. The background is dark blue. end ID]

[theposhperyton]

All evidence suggests yes

[dayurno]

any kevjean headcannons to share?

yes YES yes

i think jean is one of the few people (among neil, and occasionally andrew) who can actually make kevin laugh. he has very dry and dark humor and during their time at evermore he would often try to make kevin crack up during tetsuji's long team-wide sermons

they're one of the very few aftg ships i actually see doing the whole marriage thing. but saying marriage wouldn't be right either, because what they actually do is elope, and andrew was Very Mad when he found out

they have very intimate knowledge of each other's bodies! and yes, in the sexual sense, but i also mean this in a clinical way too. kevin specifically knows what its like to stitch jean's skin together, what pressure points to poke at to make his muscles twitch and relax, the crook of his fingers and the spots where kevin himself has splintered them, where jean aches after practice and what injuries still give him trouble

kevin is remarkably cool and uncaring when it comes to romance. jean is the only partner he's ever had that has made him feel jealous

they're absolutely MONSTROUS as a team!!!! jean does not often hang around the foxes, but the one time he and kevin paired up for beer pong in the foxes' company, they beat everyone else so badly they were disclassified on account of unfair privilege

they never truly lose that raven hivemind with each other, but it's not in the way you'd think. it's not hard to catch them doing or saying the exact same thing at the exact same time, sharing a task meant for one between the two of them, completing each other's sentences. yes it's scary. yes they're horror movie twins

they! can! only! play! piano! with! four! hands!

jean never actually gets along with wymack. as in-laws they're terrible. they can stand each other at their best, but can't be kept in the same room for long. this is not for any particular grudge; their personalities just clash. hence the elopement.

jean is very large but he is used to crouching down to make himself look smaller. this often ends with kevin patting his head absent-mindedly when he does something he approves of. even after jean loses the habit of trying to look shorter, he still lowers himself for the headpats

i have more but i will abstain because i just realized how long this is. theyre so crazy though. literally insane people. they make andreil look normal and well-adjusted

[anxiously-sidequesting]

I apologize for not posting about Malorn Ashthorn in like three months SO 👏🏾

Here are some small ☠️Malorn Ashthorn headcanons☠️ I came up with like three weeks ago but didn't post until now because of mental illness 💖💖💖

Malorn frequently talks to himself/thinks out loud without even realizing he's doing it. Something that really helped him with his job was being more descriptive and elaborative with his words and demonstrations so that his students could easily follow along with what he teaches them. It's a little out of his comfort zone, since as a person Malorn is more of a listener than a talker, but if he gets into it Malorn has a lot of fun with his lessons and enjoys delving into the subject matter more.

Malorn fiddles with his hat a lot. You can tell he's embarrassed if he huffs and tips it downward and runs his fingers along the hem. He also really likes the bells on the ends and will absentmindedly jingle them from time to time if he's in a bit of a mood.

One of the only students Malorn has a true affinity with even during his teaching career is Ceren Nightchant. He was an enjoyable peer when they were both child prodigies in Ravenwood together and due to Ceren having certain permissions from the Headmaster because of his immensely powerful Life magic (hc that Ceren was the Headmaster's errand boy before the wizard 🥲), Ceren is the closest Malorn can get when it comes to feeling equal with a peer. The adults are too old and his students are his students so having someone his age, who's also a good friend, who also understands the pressure of being perfect, who also can match his power level is a godsend to Malorn. He and Ceren still go out for lunch and break times whenever they can.

Malorn is secretly jacked. He only looks scrawny until he actually does this 💪🏾 and you can see and feel the muscles that's as hard as a stone table. Malorn was actually the one who cleaned up some of the debris (boulders, large planks of wood) surrounding the Death school when Ambrose was neglecting to do so himself.

Malorn claps a lot. Whenever he comes up with an idea, when he remembers something, or when he's excited, it's one loud CLAP. He scares people.

Speaking of being scared! Malorn does not scare easily.

Outside of Death, Malorn's favorite school is Life. That may be cliche but Life magic gives him a feeling he's missed for a while that he doesn't feel otherwise: being cared for. He loves to give but his position as a school professor, a DEATH school professor feels a bit more of a thankless job on some tough days. Life magic is a bit of an escape for him, and Malorn can feel as if he's giving without hurting himself in the process.

Malorn has an irrational fear of Fire and Storm magic. He does not like destruction. He realizes on the inside that this is irrational, and that there is much more to these magics than simply breaking things, but Malorn can help but jump at a crack of loud thunder or an accidental spark in his classroom.

Malorn is a bit of a people pleaser. He doesn't like to see people upset, or fighting, and making people happy means that it's safer for him and everyone else involved. It makes him feel good when people are happy. He's not completely spineless (he's had to deal with some tough students in his care after all), but Malorn has to swallow back some things he'd truly like to say more often than not. He says, "Okay, then!" and, "I'm doing fine!" much more than he says the opposite.

Malorn is a cat person! He loves dogs too, but he prefers cats. He has a winged catastrophe pet named Cleopatra that visits his house every night for dinner.

[cowboy-robooty]

dude can you please do a face reveal i need to see what you look like. or draw yourself. im so curious im sorry ok bye have a good day

yes i do look like the most sterotypical asian man imaginable. yes i am a biology major. yes i use reddit. yes im an incel. yes my favorite subjects are math and biology. yes i wore polo shirts through all of middle school. yes i am blind without my glasses. yes the lenses are so fucking thick they stick out of the frames. yes i have racist huge front buck-teeth. yes i am abnormally short. yes im a shitty driver. dont ask me about my penis.

[ghostcrows]

damn thats crazyyyy probably because it isnt. i love that 'transandrobros' and 'transandrophobia truthers' have come to mean just any trans guy that says hey maybe telling me i dont have any real problems caused by transphobia and/or misogyny is disingenuous and shitty

[19871997]

.

[natsmagi]

o profound tsumugi aoba philosopher how do we feel about fuyume hanamura

an angel has graced this earth dear anon........... i have not fully delved into the little guys but from what i have heard i absolutely adore yume. i saw her and instantly knew she was the daughter of all time. And ur telling me she has an unrequited love for esu and is obsessed with fairytales.............? made for me i fear. i think switch should adopt her

[gobstoppr]

and btw im in my hater arc rn. as time goes on the more i find a lot of 'fandom' stuff insufferable (i like art n stuff. just the way that fandom refits every media to fit a single mold and set of boring archetypes is exhausting.)

i just get really easily annoyed lately. and have been unfollowing people on a whim a lot. its not personal i promise

[suffarustuffaru]

ok but reinhard x julius would simultaneously be the most hilarious yet tragic pairing of all time. reinhard thinks they met when he was fourteen and julius was sixteen and like yes they did, but julius vividly remembers being ten years old and learning about reinhard and julius was like METAPHORICALLY FROTHING AT THE MOUTH BC REINHARD?? MOST POWERFUL MAN ALIVE?? ILL NEVER MEASURE UP TO HIS LEVEL.... meanwhile reinhards like hahah julius is such a good friend of mine, im so lucky to have him haha we met when we became knights when i was fourteen haha. reinhard sees him as an equal while julius is vividly aware of the Distance between them while joshua is VIVIDLY AWARE OF THE DISTANCE BETWEEN HIM AND JULIUS AND LOATHES JULIUS FOR IT. joshua loathes reinhard too so its like this big giant envy triangle from joshua to julius to reinhard and julius doesnt know about joshua and reinhard doesnt know about julius OR joshua and reinhards so head empty hes like haha julius and joshua are so nice haha. meanwhile joshuas CLENCHING HIS FISTS AND FIGHTING BACK INTENSE RAGE BY GASLIGHTING HIMSELF. hes like haha i love my brother i love my brother i love him so much haha EVEN IF HE HAS HIS HIMBO OVERPOWERED PERFECT BOYFRIEND WHO CAN KILL ANY OF US WITH JUST ONE TOUCH WHILE ALSO PERFECTLY COOKING ANY MEAL IN EXISTENCE....

meanwhile heinkel takes a five extra shots every day on top of the usual bc reinhard and julius clock in at work every day and make lovey dovey eyes at each other EVERYWHERE. joshua and heinkel are going INSANE while julius has a bad case of ace gay person who doesnt know if they wanna Be their crush or if they wanna Be With their crush and Am I Even Having Romantic Feelings? and then theres the crisis of. oh god im not allowed to have this anyway. i have to marry a girl and have kids like a good noble knight. meanwhile reinhard has no idea about any of this, partly bc hes dead inside partly bc of Too Many Powers partly bc of neurodivergence partly bc of also probably being ace partly bc of having to continue the sword saint line.

until one day he has skin to skin contact with julius and is like haha oh whats all these emotions haha? are you okay julius? :,DD and julius promptly decides to NEVER HAVE SKIN TO SKIN CONTACT WITH REINHARD AGAIN. meanwhile felix is pulling his hair out watching all of this unfold. heinkel and joshua have joined forces and are HATING EVERY INCH OF THIS DEVELOPMENT bc they WILL be homophobic only bc its REINHARD AND JULIUS. subaru gets involved in the family drama and julius personally thanks him for clowning on julius’s crush’s dad, who is also julius’s boss. and then reinhard forgets julius even though reinhard was like the MOST LIKELY PERSON to remember julius. and then reinhard’s great great great x100 grandfather vibe checks julius into oblivion. 

and thats the end of reinhard x julius a tragicomedy in several, several parts. 

[megatraven]

in a Bad Mood that even eating a brownie cannot fix 😔

[ghastbutlikegay]

dudes ive hit a point with The Horrors:tm: where im unable to convince myself that any of my friends actually like me

[transannabeth]

hi. for people who saw gatsby: an american myth. do you remember mckee asking nick for lunch. and then gatsby in like the next scene inviting nick for lunch. because i remember.

[exileorexodus]

appreciation post for professional amateurs i am processing yet again how. special the dynamic is. (throws up in my mouth)

i have known both of them since we were children, but only ever online. two of us are the sole reason why the third can even work towards a free future at ALL. we have legitimately undoomed the narrative through our combined efforts. we have all been through our separate journeys and hurdles, only occasionally crossing but always ever present on the outskirts of each other's lives, like a passive supporting brick wall to lean on to catch your breath. we have the same easy discussion and relegation of people who can only find solace in forbidden literary groups, and the same camaraderie as men who have lived and fought in wars together. we do not consider each other like family, or partners at all, but our solidarity as a group excels all of our other relationships without unhealthily drowning out any of them.

we lack co dependency,, but provide eachother with much of the same "safe place to land" as a partner would. we can have freeflow and socially damnable discussions while maintaining being different people with differing worldviews and morals and patterns of thought. we are the living embodiment of "without condoning, nor condemning, i understand." we are the only people we know who understand what it's like to lack a feeling of romantic love.

i would not give these two up for anything in the world, because it simply wouldn;t be worth it.

it boggles my mind that most other people do not have active friendships like this

[maretriarch]

amerikkkan tiktok commenters will see someone not eating three squares meals and three snacks and 9 consumer purchases of little treats and will be like I Hope You Heal One Day