#in the miscommunication issues plus...

[milfbrainrot]

I think with the context of how often simone has played Expendable characters who die for white characters' stories plus the fact of her being a woman of color which is probably part of the perceived expendability, her being vocal about the shitty handling of lottie's death and bad communication with her on set makes sense. Maybe she's not being as palatable as Juliette had been about similar but at this point why should she be. I've only been following her career for a fraction of it but I'm also tired of seeing this happen to her when she's incredibly talented and hardworking and how she has had so many people rave about how wonderful she is to work with.

[dollyyun]

CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT ✧ P.JS [ TEASER ]

PAIRING ✧ sugar daddy!jay x fem reader GENRE ✧ 18+(mdni), adulthood, 12 years age gap (reader is 22, jay is 34), ceo!jay, strangers to lovers, fluffs, soft love kinda, he falls first and falls harder, jay is a huge simp WARNING ✧ slow burn-ish, some dramas, slight misunderstanding and miscommunication, mild angst, explicit themes, 2 smut scenes (smut warnings will be indicated under cut) TEASER WORDCOUNT ✧ 2.4K CURRENT WORDCOUNT ✧ 15K (est 42k)

SYNOPSIS ✧ jay park is famously known for excelling in anything he does, except his mundane love life — it's practically nonexistent. maybe it's the pressure that constantly presses down on him due to being surrounded by his peers who are either engaged or married, but he no longer desires to retain his solitude, yearning to find someone with the intention to settle down. that is when he finally meets you — the perfect woman just for him, and perhaps the one that his heart and soul have been searching for in a long time. but the only issue is that you only see him as your sugar daddy, or so he thought.

FULL FIC HERE

JAY: I’m on my way to your place, doll. Can’t wait to see you :)

That was forty minutes ago, but you’ve been anxiously checking his message every so often, your nerves going erratic to the point where your empty stomach churns unpleasantly that you feel the urge to throw up. You have never felt this extremely nervous before, not even for your finals back in college.

You can still feel the weight of exhaustion in your eyelids that threaten to close, but the thought of Jay ringing your doorbell keeps you conscious. You couldn’t sleep well last night, tossing and turning on your bed, and you knew that it was either the excitement or the nervousness of finally meeting your sugar daddy that prevented you from getting a good night's sleep.

Plus, you had to get up four hours early to do some light chores in order to make your apartment look neat and to make yourself look as impeccable as your skin that is devoid of any unnecessary hair since the dress that you’re currently wearing displays more skin than you intended. You didn’t put in much effort in your makeup, just the perfect volume to enhance your features.

You let out a quiet groan at the realisation of the effort you put in just for a man, an older man at that, which is also utterly ridiculous, because it’s as if you are keen on impressing your sugar daddy, and this is not even a date, or is it?

The doorbell chiming throughout the apartment startles you, prompting you to abandon the couch as you pad across the living room to get to the main door. You don’t bother to check through the peephole, your hand immediately latching on the door handle, albeit your nervousness remains unabating.

Before you can spiral further, your hand has a mind of its own, because the next thing you know, you are greeted by a very handsome man whose stature towers over your figure in an imposing manner, and he’s the very same man who is also your sugar daddy.

You can barely check him out when his dark eyes compel yours, your breath hitching in your throat at the sharp intensity in his dark irises that intimidates you, but in a good way that has your heart beating rapidly. You take the opportunity of the awkward silence to trace every feature of his face with your keen eyes — how strikingly handsome he is with his chiselled forehead and jaw, his flawless nose that evokes envy within you, his dark eyebrows that look naturally refined, and his lips in mutated pink. His jet-black hair is styled impeccably in a slick back, enhancing his striking face. Oh, he’s absolutely the most gorgeous man ever.

Little do you know that while you are in a state of intimidation due to his potent yet irresistible aura that feels overwhelming, Jay feels just the same, his tongue completely tied the moment you opened the door. It is as though he’s seeing an angel, rendering him starstruck. Those pictures of you that he spent almost the entire night admiring did not do you justice, because you look radiantly beautiful up close that even the beautiful constellations in the starry sky pale in comparison.

His eyes roam around you shamelessly, his throat feeling parched while his mind is storming with such dangerous thoughts he has been trying to keep them at bay. You look sweet yet alluring at the same time as you are adorned in a blue floral printed dress that reaches above your knees, revealing the perfect curves of your legs, and the subtle low cut displays your dainty neckline that is bare of any jewellery, to which he makes a mental note to buy you one. He fights off the strong urge to ogle at your defined cleavage and how noticeably succulent the curves of your upper mounds are.

When his eyes return to your face, you are already staring at him with a small smile, your shyness nearly has his knees buckling underneath him. He simply can’t believe that you’re real. Oh, what a wonderful privilege to be able to see you up close.

“Hi.” Jay greets you breathlessly, but you are more surprised at how soft-spoken he is, such a contrast to his unyielding facade that intimidated you earlier.

“Hi.” You reciprocate softly, and it is enough to shoot a Cupid’s arrow to his beating heart. Your voice sounds velvety, a mellow that soothes him.

Jay takes another look at you, blinking his eyes as though you are unreal. “W-Wow. You look—“ He pauses, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallows a nervous lump in his throat. He softens with an awkward smile that completely charms you. “You look really beautiful.”

“Thank you.” You can’t believe how shy you are right now compared to the yapper you were last night when you texted him for nearly two hours. You take another look at him, feeling a strange flutter in your heart as you admire how he looks delectable in a button-down navy-coloured blouse that displays a teasing peek of his toned chest while his gold necklace complements his metal studs on his earlobes. “And you look really handsome.”

Jay is about to combust right here and now at your compliment that he has heard countless times from the ladies that pinned his attention back then, even more so when you beam at him with a slightly wider smile now. The weight in his hand immediately reminds him of what he intended to do after you opened the door before your beauty distracted him.

“This is for you.” Jay extends his hand to you, prompting you to look down at a small bouquet of flowers in his grasp, but you can see the hesitation in the way his hand slowly retracts from you. “Unless you have allergies to flowers, which is totally fine. I can keep it—“

“I don’t have any, so don’t worry.” You reassure him, and without thinking twice, your hand quickly reaches out to accept his sweet gesture, only to feel a faint electricity when your fingers brush against his before you finally grab the bouquet from him. Your heart swells with something unfamiliar as you look at the flowers before meeting his kind gaze. “Thank you for these. It’s the first that someone has ever given me flowers on a first meeting.”

You almost wanted to utter the word ‘date’ because this is certainly not a date but more like a formal meeting with your sugar daddy as part of the first transaction. You mentally berate yourself for hoping for something that you were initially against and the fact that you only intend to regard him as your sugar daddy. 

Jay’s bashful shell cracks when he adorns a smirk on his handsome face that has you swooning on the inside. “You can call me old-fashioned.”

“I love old-fashioned.” You decide to play along as you notice the spark of mischief in his eyes, but really, you do love yourself some old-fashioned.

“Are you ready to go?” Jay asks coolly, hoping that he doesn’t sound too eager as to how impatiently desperate he really is to spend the day with you.

“Yes. Just give me a sec.” You tell him while making your way to the shoe compartment, where you also place the bouquet on the counter, before grabbing your ankle-strapped heels.

As you return to him, you busily place your feet onto the heels before attempting to secure the strap around your ankles, only to be surprised when Jay gets down on one knee in front of you, rendering you flabbergasted. “Please. Allow me.” He insists without looking up at you, putting his hands into the task.

“It’s okay! I can do it myself—“ But your protest goes unheard as he secures the straps for you with such gentleness that it sends the weird flutter to your heart again, while the way his fingers brush against your skin feels electrifying.

Your eyes never leave him even after he’s done, his figure towering over yours again despite the heels that elevate your height. “Shall we?” Jay asks with a smile, to which you nod your head at before stepping outside of the threshold and locking the door.

The two of you proceed to make your way to the elevator, silence wrapping around you once more, but only less awkwardly. You chew your bottom lip out of habit, wanting to say something to dispel this awkwardness, but the heat of his body close next to you sends your head into a frenzy.

“Do you live alone?” Jay breaks the ice, and you silently thank him because you were slowly going insane. As soon as he presses the button, the elevator chimes open, and he gestures to you to enter first before he follows suit.

“Sort of.” You answer unsurely, earning a look of intrigue from him. You decide to explain shortly. “I live with my best friend, but ever since she got into a relationship, she’s rarely ever at our shared apartment, not that I minded. She can be quite a headache.”

His lips twitch into a smile, almost as if he’s being fond of something. “My best friend’s the same too.” He chuckles lightly, but they sound heavenly in your ears. “What about family? Any siblings?”

“And here I thought it was my turn to ask you a question.” You say cheekily, your lips stretching a little wider as you feel inclined to be frivolous towards him after the lingering awkwardness dissipates into thin air.

His eyes narrow at you in a playful suspicion, followed by a broad smirk on his lips. “You’re a cheeky doll, aren’t you?”

“It’s only fair that I ask you a question after you asked me one.” You say in an airily manner, ignoring how his handsome smirk has your mind in a frenzy once more. “But to answer your question, I’m an only child. My parents are divorced, so I’m kinda my own now. Always have.”

Being a natural observant that comes with an ability to heed the tone of voice, even the subtlest intonation, Jay recognises the underlying resentment in the neutrality of your voice and how he catches a fleeting sentiment he knows all too well in your eye, but the radiant smile on your face immediately overshadows any traces of somberness, albeit he is quick to grasp that family must be a sensitive topic for you. 

“It seems that we have a lot more in common than I thought. I’m an only child too.” Jay says lightly in an attempt to dispel any sour feelings within you. He opens his mouth to say something, but the elevator chimes open, revealing the view of the basement parking lot. He allows you to step out first before he follows suit, guiding you to his car. “So what’s the next question you have for me?”

“What made you become interested in me? You could’ve chosen other sugar babies.” You ask with genuine curiosity. The question has been lingering in the back of your mind all night. As he looks at you with an eyebrow raised, you try to search for something in his eyes, any falsehood or that he’s actually a bad guy with ill intentions, but all you see is the pure kindness that reflects the window of his soul.

“I just had a good feeling about you.” He answers with utmost sincerity, his eyes softening before giving you his signature smirk. “Besides, there was no way I would ever pass up a woman as gorgeous as you.”

A part of you feels so tempted to wipe away that handsome smirk off his face with a kiss, but you immediately ward off any inappropriate thought, diverting your attention to the sleek black Mercedes-Benz, his car.

Jay, being the gentleman he is, opens the passenger door for you, to which you shyly thank him before you carefully settle inside. Not too long later, Jay is right next to you, operating the functions of the vehicle that is wheeling towards where the main road is at.

The silence is accompanied by the music emanating from the radio on the dashboard, but it still isn’t enough to allay the newfound tension settling in your bones. You even distract yourself by discreetly examining the impeccable condition of the car that comes with a pleasant lavender smell before you notice the small bottle of fragrance diffuser that hangs in the air from behind the rearview mirror.

Something different flutters within you, how oddly intensifying it is, but one thing is for sure — you find Jay dangerously more attractive than the first time you felt.

You cave into the temptation to take a glance at him, only to nearly gawk at his strong yet flawless side profile, how his angular jawline looks defined up close. His face displays such cool impassivity, exuding an air of confidence compared to your meekness. Your eyes fall to his veiny hands before they travel lower; his sleeves had been pulled to his elbows, allowing the sultry veins that protrude in his arms and revealing a golden Rolex that latched around his wrist. You quickly look away, feeling the gradual heat building up in your body.

You swear that older men are not your type, but Jay may be the first to change that.

“Are you okay?” Jay asks, his soft voice startling you. The way he’s hot, a stickler for cleanliness, and soft-spoken? You must have done something incredibly honourable in your past life.

“Nervous, actually.” You tell him honestly, daring yourself to look at him as he briefly takes a glance at you before refocusing on the road. Though you still feel diffident, something about him compels you to confide your worries in him. “I just don’t want to mess things up on our first meeting.”

Jay cracks into a humorous smile. “Funny, because I had the same thought earlier.” Oh, he really did, worrying incessantly all morning that he might have fucked up by coming off too desperate for your attention.

“Is this a date?” You accidentally blurt out the question you intended to expel, but a part of you genuinely keen that this is actually a date and not just a formal transactional meeting between a sugar daddy and his sugar baby.

As the traffic light turns red, the car comes to a stop. Jay directs his full attention to you, a gentle smile touching his lips. “You can call it whatever you want, doll.”

You hold his gaze for a little longer, unable to fathom the inscrutable emotions behind the window of his eyes despite the unwavering kindness. You find yourself lifting a smile that mirrors his. “A date it is.”

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[jirsungs]

NO IDEA ☆ l.dh

pairing: loser!donghyuck x fem!reader

no idea synopsis: a story where both you and lee donghyuck seem to get what you want. he's the perfect pawn in making your ex-boyfriend jealous and the smarty pants tutor helping you pass your math class. donghyuck has it easy too, he's finally able to seek out and experience the world of dating through you, his long-devoted crush and surprisingly enthusiastic tutoring student. but then again, when meaningless tutoring sessions soon evolve into reciprocated feelings, is it really that easy?

genre: college au, nonidol au, fake dating au, social media au (includes written chapters), classmates to friends to lovers, he's a nerd & she's a popular cheerleader (you see where this is going), he fell first but she fell harder trope, kinda based off to all the boys i've loved before, fluff, crack/humor, angst, one-sided pining that turns into mutual pining

warnings: explicit language, unrealistic college partying, talks about family issues (this does NOT reflect any of the idol's families!), yuqi has an ex gf, some alcohol consumption, kys and sexual humor, bullying, hyuck and his buds are mistreated ☹️, hyunjin is a bad bf!!!, cheesy af, unrequited love, bad insults that sound like they're from the 2000s, HELLA miscommunication

no idea playlist: btr's no idea, taylor swift's you belong with me, the vamps + demi lovato's somebody to you, james arthur's can i be him, ariana grande's daydreamin, fitz & the tantrums' out of my league, shawn mendes' treat you better, bruno mars' just the way you are, lonely god's marlboro nights, the 1975's i'm in love with you, sam smith's like i can, arctic monkeys' wanna be yours

author's note: FIRST HYUCK SMAUU! how we feeling 😏 i needed to get this idea out of my system! plus, i love this type of trope, and haechan just fits the nerdy role 😭 I HAD TO! but happy reading :D <3

comment if you wish to be tagged for the story's updates!

profiles: "ncu freaks" + jeno 🤔 | gal pals & two men

intro. #manifestationiskey 🩷

ep 1. but a FAILING?

ep 2. i guess i'm her tutor

ep 3. WHY IS HE ATTRACTIVE

ep 4. COUGH y/n bag him COUGH

ep 5. i know i can treat youuu bettterr

ep 6. YNHYUCK PLOT IS FINALLY SAILING!

ep 7. bro texts with his 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 𝓪𝓵𝓹𝓱𝓪 mode on 🐺👅

ep 8. bro fumbled HARD 🤦‍♂️

ep 9. LET THE BOY LIVE!! HES IN LOVE!!

ep 10. THE HARD LAUNCH GOES CRAZY

ep 11. lemme guess, fake boyfriend responsibilities? (written)

ep 12. jeno got me up... plotting

ep 13. AMAZING fake boyfriend

ep 14. meeting the ncu freaks? (written)

ep 15.

ep 16.

ep 17.

ep 18.

more to come. . .!

started: 09/06/24 finished:

© JIRSUNGS. ANY TRANSLATIONS/REPOSTS/PUBLISHES OF MY WORKS ON ANY PLATFORM ARE STRICTLY PROHIBITED! ALL COMMENTS, REBLOGS, LIKES, & FEEDBACK ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED! THANK YOU SO MUCH! I LOVE YOU, MWA! <3

[cryinggirlnamedhelen]

bllk characters as love interests in different anime :

isagi - nah he’s none of them; bro is literally born to be shojo forced to be shonen. someone get him into a shojo manga at this instant

bachira - hanako from toilet bound hanako kun, PLEASE HEAR ME OUT ON THIS, they’re both overly cheerful and always getting injured and eeeeee

reo - jinshi from the apothecary diaries omgomgomg (ik the apothecary diaries isn’t technically a shojo anime but shh) they both are purple hair and eyes, are extremely attractive, and rich? mhm mhm (they even have the same personality)

nagi - yamada from my love story with yamada at lvl 999, aughhhh they’re both gamers who are rlly stoic but actually not that bad omg nagi should lowkey be a shojo love interest fr😔

kaiser - tomoe from kamisama kiss, YES YOU HEARD ME RIGHT. there is this amazing kamisama kiss x kaiser AU by @everfallenwings linked HERE which was so peaked and i literally love it

rin - kyo from fruits basket PLEASEEEE they both have anger issues and family issues and they’re both tsunderes who have a hard time receiving affection

karasu - misaki from maid sama, alright ik misaki is a girl but god her personality is almost just like karasu. plus usui is such a creep like please lock him up

yukimiya - kazehaya from kimi ni todoke, listen i hate the miscommunication in that show but i love the main couple sm, they’re literally the cutest ever ahhh

sae - usui if he wasn’t a creep from maid sama, listen i rlly don’t like usui because he was excused from literal crimes just because he was hot…like i rlly wanted misaki to end up single but oh well. anyways sae has basically the same personality as usui (when usui isn’t being a creep)

shidou - random thoughts but isn’t he literally haru from my little monster…? says some rlly weirdass things and also does some rlly weirdass things but still lowkey pretty funny

[sunflower-ozzy-online]

Depths of the Heart

This was supposed to be your last excursion with the party and now you're trapped with Laios. What will be revealed while Chilchuck takes his sweet time helping you out?

Miscommunication? sorta both Laios and the reader are oblivious to their feelings. I did give the reader some anxiety so there's that <3

ダンジョン飯 | Dungeon Meshi | Delicious in Dungeon

Relationship: Laios Touden/Reader

Characters: Namari, Chilchuck Tims, Falin Touden, Marcille Donato, Shuro | Nakamoto Toshiro, Laios Touden

Additional Tags: Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety

As you walk on the stone floors your footsteps echo alongside your parties. The third floor was known for having hidden doorways and traps from floor to ceiling so Chilchuck was leading the group. His senses worked on overdrive making sure the path was safe. 

You had already been in the dungeon for two days so the conversation was light. Marcille and Falin were chatting quietly, probably about spells or their years in the academy. Laios was sticking by Shuros side, like a puppy following a stray cat, asking questions about monsters in the east. Namari and you brought up the rear, protecting the rest of the party from possible attacks. Namari wasn't much of a conversationalist, other than when it came to weapons, so you two walked in a fairly comfortable silence. 

Your mind drifted to your conversation with her before you entered the dungeon a few weeks ago. The party was out to dinner while going over the last excursion. You had wanted to get her input about your thoughts on possibly leaving the party.

“Why!? I mean, not that there aren’t any valid reasons to leave and find a different party, or employer but I thought you and Laios… Got along well. And you like the rest of the party too. You seem happy enough with the progress and payment?” her eyes looking over to where the rest of the party ate in the meal hall. 

“I did, I do. It’s just lately I find myself making mistakes and not feeling like I fit in. The vibes have changed you know? Plus I got an offer for room and board and a paying position in another party on the island. And I know you were thinking about leaving for a little while so I thought I’d get your thoughts.”

She took in your words for a beat and then responded, “I have been getting offers from other parties as well, and they are pretty enticing. Especially when Laios can be a less-than-great leader in the social aspects of leading. Though it would take something pretty impactful to make me just get up and leave.” 

You nod along as she talks. 

“But that’s me. What's important is that if you feel like staying in the party is not for you then that's what you feel. Before you leave you should talk to Laios, see if maybe this is something you could ya know, work out together.”

Your face grows hot at her suggestion, that was the opposite of what you wanted to do. Recently just being around Laios made you self-conscious and kinda clumsy, which is not what you wanted when in a life or death situation “Maybe. I’ll give it some thought. Thanks, Namari.” 

When you had gone to Namari you had expected her to agree with you and support your decision to leave. It would make sense given that she was always voicing her displeasure with the financial situation. It seemed strange that she would encourage you to try and talk through your issues. Walking on the third floor you think about the resignation letter you had in your pack for after the end of this crawl. You hadn't told anyone yet, not wanting to ruin your last adventure together. Though most of the party members had noticed your emotional distance, besides Laios. He would still tell you monster facts about the monsters you had just taken down, even repeating ones he had told you before. Earlier on you would grin and comment on them, or even offer some of your own. Now however it makes you feel uneasy when his smiling face and positive energy are directed towards you. You simply acknowledged his words and continued. 

You can't blame him for not noticing. You were trying to not let him know how strange you felt, and you were not about to tell him and make him concerned. And what if he got mad at you when you told him, you couldn't handle that? It would be easier to just take it on yourself and remove yourself from the equation. You had been in your mind so much you hadn't noticed that there was an odd stone in your path. Though Laios had. 

“(Y/N!)” he shouted while rushing back towards you. You looked at him right as your foot stepped down. His body collided with you as the section of floor you were standing on gave out beneath you. 

~~~

“Damn it!” you exclaimed after you had landed properly on your bottom with Laios’ body over top of yours. “I can’t believe I was dumb enough to step on that pressure plate! I should have been paying attention.” 

“We all make mistakes,” Laios said while standing up and dusting himself off. “Plus Chilchuck should be able to find the release mechanism up above. Then Marcille or Falin can help us out.” He starts looking around, the temporary holding place having a few torches for light. “At least it wasn’t a spike pit.” 

“We shouldn't try to escape without Chilchuck. We may get ourselves into even more trouble if we press the wrong thing. Plus neither of us specialize in things like this.” you tell him, worried as he walks along the perimeter of the room.

He nods along, “You’re right, looks like we’ll just have to wait it out.”  

Your heart beats loudly in your chest. Not only were you trapped due to your airheadedness you also had brought Laios down with you.  Mistakes like this were exactly why you needed to leave. You were becoming a danger to yourself and others. Whenever Laios was around or on your mind you just could not focus. Why had you decided on one last trip? You had already agreed to the new job?  You knew you couldn't be trusted but you just had to follow along. But when Laios told you about the plans for this trek you just agreed, without a second thought. And now, you could die in this stupid room and no corpse retriever would be able to find you. No, you try to tell yourself, you're only on the third floor and you trust your party. As long as you stayed where you were and did not move there would be no way you could mess it up anymore.

“Well while we're here we may as well make lunch.” 

“Yeah I guess.” you're an idiot

~~~

Laios went through his rations finding some dried meat and barley rice. He didn’t have enough water to soak the barley rice in. 

“I think I have some backup in my pack, you can check. Oh, also I brought some seasonings along if you would grab those too” You were busy using your limited magical knowledge to start a fire. 

“Thanks.”  No matter what was cooked he would always stomach it with enthusiasm if it came from you but you did pride yourself on being able to make the rations a bit better with seasonings and some oil. Some people, Chilchuck, thought it was an unnecessary weight but you liked it. Plus you could tell he liked it better when you were on cooking duty. 

Rummaging sounds came from Laios as he looked through your pack for the ingredients. Your fire was done and you placed the pan over the fire to start heating up. 

“Here.” he handed you the water and your spice pouch. 

“Thank you Laios,” you added the water to the pan and let it come to heat as you prepared the barley rice. 

After a while the food was ready. You and Laios ate together. It may have been your anxiety but he seemed suspiciously quiet. Laios was rarely this quiet for this long, always filling the air with his thoughts on monsters or the dungeon, freely asking questions about his party members' lives. To be fair you were quieter lately, though he had not seemed to notice, he would have brought it up. Or would he? He wasn't very keen on social cues so you hadn't seen him confront anyone about it before. 

“When are you leaving?” 

“Huh?” 

“I saw your notice in your bag, signed and everything.” 

“Oh,” You forgot you had it in your bag when you told him to look for the ingredients. “I was planning on leaving after this crawl.” 

“I… I thought you liked it, you know, with us.” 

“I do.” 

“Then why are you leaving, is it finances? I know we're a little down right now but if there was a problem why didn’t you come to me?” 

“It’s not the money, I mean it didn’t help but that’s not it.” 

“Did someone say something? Did they make you feel unwelcome or uncomfortable?” he looked worried now “Is it me?” 

You had paused long enough for Laios to pick up on it. 

“It is, isn't it? What was it?  I…  thought we got along well. That we were friends!”

“We were, or are.” You shook your head “It’s not you, you haven’t changed or done anything wrong. I just, I’ve been off and I can’t figure it out.” your heart was beating even faster, you were shaking. This was exactly the conversation you wanted to avoid. 

His head tilted “Off? Like sick?”

“No, more like clumsy. My thoughts keep wandering and I make silly mistakes like getting us trapped here or like during our last crawl. Do you remember when I got sucked into that living painting and Shuro had to jump in to get me? I had zoned out looking right at it and didn't notice it moving! I could have gotten Shuro hurt.” 

Laios is looking at you like you're a hurt puppy

“I’ve become a burden on the rest of the party. It’s not fair to you guys for me to stay so I accepted an offer from another party. They're giving me room and board too, so that’s nice.”

Laios seems to be thinking over your words, looking down at his now-forgotten food.

“But if you are leaving cause you’re distracted how will that be fixed by leaving? Won’t you just be distracted in a new setting? That seems even more dangerous! You don’t know if you can trust your new party members. At least with us you know we will always have your back.” 

“I didn't even want to have this conversation. It would have been so much easier if we had a successful crawl and then I would tell the party I was leaving and said our goodbyes. Simple and nice. People change parties all the time Laios!” 

“That doesn't answer my question.”

You sigh and look away from him, looking towards the torch on the wall. They are always lit yet they never burn out. Must be tiring “I know.” He doesn't take his eyes off of you. “I guess it’s because it usually only happens when I'm with this party. Well mostly.” You can't bring yourself to fully look at him. 

“Oh.” 

You breathed in, hoping he would just drop it. Hoping he would come to some kind of understanding in his head. 

“But why?” 

Of course not. 

You buried your face in your hands. “I don't know.” 

“If we can work this out then I want to try. You shouldn’t leave.”  

“It’s not like I want to leave! I just, I can’t justify putting you and the others at risk because I’m afraid to lose my friendships. I just know that when I’m around the party I get self-conscious or I keep thinking weird things and I make avoidable mistakes.” 

“Self-Conscious?”

“Yeah … like if I look okay, or if I’m fighting well or not. If i'm being too loud or talking too much or not enough. As if I was an adolescent again trying to make the cool kids like me.”

He takes some time to weigh your words in his head.  

“Well I don’t know much about romance but that kind of seems like maybe you have a crush? Maybe? Marcille has talked to me about some of the books she read, and one of the characters acts like that around the character they want to court.”

Your heart seems to stop. 

“I think the next step is to figure out who it is and then tell them. You should ask Marcille though she really likes this kind of stuff. She's been talking about it to me more lately so she must really want someone to talk about it with.”

“Oh god.” of course it’s just a crush you feel so silly. “I guess that makes sense.” But who? 

Oh. Oh no. 

“Maybe it’s Shuro? He is pretty cool, and strong. Or Marcille, I know some people really find elves attractive, plus she's also good at magic.” 

Of course it's Him. It could never have been anyone else. 

“Or Namari, you two do seem pretty close.” 

Before you started having trouble your thoughts were always filled with ‘What does Laios think about this’ and ‘I wonder if Laios would be interested in that’, you had just thought he was a good friend. It was right around the time he had carried you away from an attacking dryad after it had pierced your thigh that you became more distant. He was always so careful with you and attentive. But he had never shown you any interest, not romantically. You weren't sure if he was even interested in those kinds of things. If leaving the group was bad, being rejected by Laios would be even worse. There was no way you could tell him now.

“Never mind. It’s probably best for me to leave. I wonder when Chilchuck will figure this damned trap out huh?” 

“Y/N?” 

“It’s already been like 30 minutes at least right?” you got up abruptly.

“Y/N.” 

“Maybe we should try and figure out a way to escape. They could have been ambushed.” you were now walking around the room looking for switches.

“I don’t think so, and even if they had been they would have taken care of any monsters we were only on the third floor. Why don’t you want to talk about this?”  He was still sitting on the ground

“I’m feeling restless.” your hands ran against the wall, looking intently at the grooves.

“But if we work it out then you may not have to leave? You just have to tell them.” He sounds a little breathless.

“They don’t like me, Laios. Not like that.” Your fingers find a loose piece of stone

“You figured out who it was?” He’s almost hopeful

“Yes.” you pick at the small rock

“But you won't tell them?” confused

“No.” you let it fall from the wall

“So you're still going to leave?” 

The rock sits still in the place it fell

“Yes.” 

“Will you look at me?” 

“No.” 

A beat passes 

“We don’t want you to leave.”

“You don’t know that. I’m sure you can find another decent party member to take my place.” 

“I don’t want you to leave.” 

“Maybe a Kobold, that would be cool.” 

“I don't want a Kobold, I want you.” 

“No you don’t.” 

“Don’t tell me what I want. I don't want another party member, it’s not even about losing a party member. I just want you. Don’t leave.” 

“You don’t want me Laios.” 

“I do.” 

“No, you don’t!” you whip around to look in his direction unable to fully look at him, tears have been collecting in your water line for a while now. “You don’t want me!” A tear finally spills, you take a deep breath in and look away “Not like I want you. So just… let me go. I will be fine, Laios.” you don't want to yell at him, you don’t want to be crying.  “God what is taking them so long.” putting your focus on the ceiling where you fell from. 

Calloused yet soft hands touch your face, you don't know how he got so close to you so fast. Or quietly for that matter with all that armor on. 

“Look at me, please.” 

You sniffled, letting your eyes turn down to meet his. He, noticeably, was not crying. He was smiling, softly, a blush adorned his cheeks. His eyes took in your face and a huff of breath escaped his lips. 

“It’s not funny, Laios.” scolding him. You had just basically confessed and now he was what? Amused by the fact you were crying?

“It kind of is. You see I have just realized we are probably two of the stupidest people in our party.” 

“You’re not stupid.” 

“No, I am. Because I have had you in front of me for how long? And I am just now realizing how much I like you. Marcille didn’t want to talk about her books. She was trying to make me realize my feelings for you. Chilchuck has been complaining about in party romances more lately, And Namari told me you were thinking about leaving and yet I couldn’t even let myself fathom being without you that I let you pull away from us, from me.” 

“What?” 

“And you’re stupid if you think I wouldn't reciprocate your feelings. You are so stunning and clever, well usually. You let me ramble about monsters and you always light up when you talk about cooking or other interests. Anyone would be lucky to be on the receiving side of your affection.”

“But you've never even shown the slightest interest in anything romantic before.”  

He nods while wiping at your tear stained cheeks with his thumb.

“It is rare, but it has happened before. Though it was never reciprocated, after that I kind of gave up. I focused on being a soldier, and being a good brother to Falin. It seemed like I would never have a chance to love, much less be loved like that.” he looked down and away but just for a second. “I’m sorry I made you feel unwanted.” 

“I can’t believe I didn't realize what it was before we fell in this stupid hole.” you giggled slightly

“I’m glad you did, otherwise I wouldn't have gotten to do this.” 

“Hmm?” 

He softly placed his lips on yours. It was tentative, and unmoving. You pushed back lightly, letting your lips slot in with his.  

Above you the ceiling opened up, grabbing both of your attentions. 

“We should get our stuff.” you say. Slowly you pull away from each other and pick up your back packs. Hiding your flushed faces from view. 

~~~

It took a little bit of time but with some rope and climbing you were both able to get out of the hole. It seemed that the rest of the party also had lunch while you were in the trap. A part of you wanted to cuss them out for leaving you down there so long. The other part was grateful because now you had Laios and you got yourself back. Shuro was avoiding looking at the both of you but Chilchuck and Marcille seemed pretty smug.  

Smiling, Chilchuck finally spoke up “Sorry it took me so long, it was a very complicated mechanism.” Asshole. You glared at him as Laios spoke up.

“No it’s fine, but we did loose quite a bit of time we should probably move on if we want to make it to the fourth floor.” 

Everyone agreed and started to pack up and head out. While everyone was busy Laios grabbed your hand and gave it a slight squeeze. You would have to talk later but for now you felt lighter than you had in a while. You reminded yourself that you needed to rip up that notice and send out a letter to the other party. This one suited you just fine.

Masterlist

[minecraftakis]

*+:｡.｡ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ | giyuu bf hcs!! pt.2

a/n: nao lets act like i didn’t disappear BUT ANYWAYS im gonna write some more hcs since this angst i had planned is taking way longer than i expected!! lmk who yall wanna see next or what yall see :3 (pt.1 here!)

pairing: giyuu tomioka x gn!reader

cw: doodoo, kinda short, fluff, sfw!, not proofread, blah blahh

+.˚ · • . ° .*+:.｡✫

- giyuu as a bf! who asks for your hands to play with them, he’s the type to trace the creases on your palm, rub the back of your hand, and thumb at any scars or scratches you have. giyuu enjoys the feeling/or touching of things that soothe him.

- giyuu as a bf! never EVER hides your relationship, he’s private but he’s not secretive. like he’s not the type to be open about it just like thatt so somebody would have to literally ask him if he had a s/o to find out.

- giyuu as a bf! who gets very worried about your safety, especially if you’re in the demon slayer corp. he doesn’t doubt your strength but as someone that he deeply cares for, he wants to know that you are safe and well. this causes alot of issues and conflicts in the beginning of your relationship with him, but you eventually surpass this with time.

- giyuu as a bf! that only on a blue moon do the you and him ever get into disagreements and conflicts. it’s usually miscommunication, or a misunderstanding and a lot of times it’s cause of his pent up emotions that are very unpredictable. a lot of times you guys can talk about whatever’s bothering him or you, but when you can’t he gets really distant, and he usually gives you the silent treatment. he really only does this cause he doesn’t want to say something he’ll regret later, but you know that, so you’re not too worried!

- giyuu as a bf! writes and is always writing you poems or letters in his spare time. if you’re off on a mission he’ll send you long letters of anything that’s he’s been doing lately and how he’s waiting for your safe return.

- giyuu as a bf! lobes to cuddle. he is the most cuddle-bug of cuddle-bugs! he likes when you cradle him cause he can hide his face and sniff you, plus you can caress his big head and kiss his forehead. it could be in bed cuddling or just as you sit somewhere buttt he loves your warmth and the pressure of when ur on top of him, he says “dear, come here. get on top of me.” or he’ll just grab you and do it himself.

- giyuu as a bf! doesn’t get jealous a lot, but when he is he gets quiet. not like silent treatment, but he’ll get really questionative and start like interrogating you type… and by then you know he’s jealous so you’re super quick to reassure and comfort him. he’s like he’s like “what were you doing today..?” and then he’s like “who were you with today…?”

- giyuu as a bf! really likes when you play with his hair, he likes when you brush it and he really likes when you style it. you calm him a lot like that.

- giyuu as a bf! thinks that kisses are very special and intimate and he’s very certain with how and when he wants to kiss you. he’s not strict by any means but yk! he likes kissing your cheeks, anything around your neck and he loves kissing your shoulders and like that area. he goes crazy at your nape!! your hands,and your lips. he might be a man of a few words but he does so good at making you feel so very loved.

+.˚ · • . ° .*+:.｡✫

a/n: highkey wanna write some freaky hcs now.. cause i’m in need of it but!! who knows!! lmk what yall think or if yall have some other hcs! >u<

[absolutebl]

10 Best BL Shows with the Hottest Sexitimes

Because this is English and word order matters, this title means the show itself has to be good AS WELL AS the scenes high heat, as opposed to the best sex scenes in BL. The two are not necessarily the same list. Anyway I tried to pick both high heat and a fun show. This was hard (pun intended).

FYI expect triggers with your high heat.

(Oh right. For me to get a 3/3 heat rating the BL has simulated sex in it or very close to it. And usually one or more other sexual acts like bjs, a-ply, etc...)

So, I went to the spreadsheet, and sorted it by high heat and then ranking, and here is what I got. I think #1 will surprise you. What will not surprise you is it's mostly Thai and Taiwanese.

10. TharnType (and follow ups)

Thai 2019 Viki

Should it still rank, all these years later? I am sorry to say, yes it should. University setting, great acting and complex characters, interesting friendship groups, enemies to lovers, seriously angsty coming out, high production values, AMAZING chemistry, multiple BL side couples with all the issues, damaging queer rep, strong seme/uke and husband/wife language, classic tropes and lots of them bad.

But it's famous for a reason.

This was KinnPorsche before KinnPorsche.

9. Addicted: Heroin

China 2016 Viki

When Chinese BL was good it was very dirty good and when it was bad it was censored. This is the model for that statement: rich kid falls madly for the genius poor kid in his class, starts an aggressive pursuit, includes kidnapping for love, obsession, stepbrother trope, plus some cheating. I love this BL because of what I could have been.

Just stop watching it after The Sex Scene. Okay?

8. Love Stage!!

Thai 2022 YouTube

This BL surprised me with its charm. The acting was good, the leads were appealing, support cast on point, and the production values high. It followed the original manga story arc relatively closely: boy falls in love with girl as a child, grows up to discover girl is actually a very pretty boy.

Although there are some quintessentially Thai changes that mellowed, softened, and extended the romance arc and heat levels.

7. HIStory 4: Close to You

Taiwan 2021 Viki

Nancy Chen directs, the side dish plot is basically a pastiche of problematic BL tropes inherited from the above. Great chemistry, high heat, stepbrothers, dubcon, obsession, stalker etc…

They sexy tho.

6. My Day

Pinoy 2020 YouTube

The set up on this one is enemies (also boss/employee) and they don’t like each other to start. But that gets resolved pretty quickly. And then they are some of the cutest, hottest, and best boyfriends ever.

This is an under-appreciated BL, IMHO.

5. Cutie Pie

Thai 2022 YouTube

Very high production (and heat) and a lot of visual references to live action yaoi gave this show a whiff of Japan but ultimately it stayed firmly in Thailand’s BL camp veering from absurd to appealing to annoying and then back to absurd again. If you can roll with the arranged marriage conceit and very lifestyle D/s relationships, the chemistry is spot on even if the plot is naff and driven by miscommunication.

Watch this one for the pretty, give it a pass on depth. (It has depth, it just depth of tongue kisses.)

Also the follow up: Naughty Babe

4. Bed Friend

Thai 2023 YouTube but for high heat you'll net to watch on iQIYI

Office frienamies transition a flaming hot one night stand into a f-buddy relationship that is built on a puppy/cat dynamic (and kinks into it at one point). Our puppy is loyal, smitten, and protective with endlessly longing eyes, while our cat is snarky, prickly, and deeply damaged (ALL THE TRIGGERS).

NetJames give lovely high-heat with excellent chemistry and tuned-in performances of surprising depth, unfortunately the story ultimately failed them. Had the show had the strength of its convictions and kept to a tighter, darker, harsher 8 eps it would have been the first high heat to earn a 10/10 from me, but once they fussed with it, it dropped to a solid 8/10. Could have been great but was overworked.

Still if high heat is your thing, this one will not let you down.

3. HIStory 3: Trapped

Taiwan 2019 Viki

Basically the definition of enemies to lovers from Lin Pei Yu. This is a cop + the mafia man he is chasing but WAIT, they fall in love. Added bonus side couple: assassin and nerd cop ALSO falling in love. It’s great. All the leads are stellar. Its high heat, fun action, and a bit of a mystery drama but pretty about all of it.

My only warning is that the main couple doesn’t entirely end up together, it’s implied, but… amorphous ending.

2. Why R U?

Thai 2020 Viki

No one knows what’s going on, not even the characters, but absolutely no one cares 'cause it's so thirsty. The plot seems to be "great chemistry and make sure Zee's shirts are NEVER BUTTONED PROPERLY." We, the collective, have a pro Hawaiian shirt anti-button stance, so rah rah rah! (Still the most confusing thing about this show is: why they didn't just title it YRU?)

The FighterTuror sex scenes still stand as some of the best ever fielded in a Thai BL. I will not be entertaining opposition on this matter.

1. Be Loved In House: I Do

Taiwan 2021 Viki

A cute classy office set BL with a few plot raised eyebrows, but no other concerns. ALL THE TROPES plus a general sweet softness that’s pretty rare from Taiwan, who usually prefer to go hard, but all their signature domesticity.

There is one high heat sex scene and it's great. But it's the whole package of classic sappy Taiwanese BL that puts this at the very top for me.

Generally just v high heat?

Hottest sex scenes in BL is frankly gonna be largely a matter of your personal taste.

But if the ones mentioned above don't work try:

KinnPorsche

Love in the Air

Big Dragon

HIStory 3; MODC (the BL that shall not be named)

Be Mine Super Star

Manner of Death (and anything else with MaxTul)

Oh My Sunshine Night (sides)

Secret Crush on You

Wedding Plan

Most dark JBL has very good high heat, but... ya know.

For @samara44 by request.

Dated Nov 2023, not responsible for amazing high head that came after.

(source)

[scripts4dreamers]

All I see

AN: So, I wrote a Garrus Vakarian piece a while back and one of my friends pointed out that I had committed the cardinal sin, which is making two characters have healthy communication about an issue. She said "where is the ANGST. Where is the CODEPENDENCY" and, you know what? She's a real one for that. So, here is me going back to my teen years, rewriting a similar situation with 10x the miscommunication and jealousy, plus my ham fisted attempt at smut, which I usually avoid. I hope you enjoy! Warnings: Mature, sexual content and themes Spoilers: None

As he watched Shepard stumble off to the bathroom, her naked skin catching the light in a way that made him ache, Garrus had to admit, he’d really screwed himself this time. It had seemed so harmless at first, just two friends helping one another unwind, a much needed release of tension after hard fights with the added bonus of getting to try something new sexually with someone he could trust. Casual, meaningless sex. He’d done it before, he’d even enjoyed doing it before but, damnit, it had gotten complicated quickly. Not for Shepard. No, as far as Garrus could tell she was thoroughly enjoying their arrangement but, then again, Shepard hadn’t been violently suppressing her feelings for him for the better part of three years. Shepard wasn’t a closeted hopeless romantic whose heart famously lived in her dick. Shepard didn’t live in a ship - hell, a universe - filled to the brim with people who wanted to fuck Garrus. Oh no, that particular punishment was reserved solely for him.

It was a strange kind of torment to watch the woman you’ve been falling for for years, your best friend in the galaxy, and the universe’s only hope, get flirted with by every Turian, Asari, Drell and Human they came across mere hours after she was screaming your name and coming all over your cock as she begged you to pull her hair harder, but here Garrus was. At first it hadn’t bothered him much. Shepard was powerful, she was beautiful, she was charismatic and charming, she was dependable and dutiful and creative. She was irresistible to him, so how could he begrudge her for being irresistible to everyone else as well? And, most importantly, she came home to him. Let the security guy at C-Sec daydream about the famous Commander Shepard, he would think to himself, it was Garrus who got to make that dream a reality. But then time started to pass, the sex got infinitely better and Garrus’ feelings for Shepard got infinitely more complicated.

Garrus’s long held assertion that his feelings for Shepard were just a temporary infatuation stemming from how much she had changed his life on board the Normandy SR1 mixed with the heady, intoxicating relief of finding out she wasn’t dead had started to ring hollow. Too much time had passed and his feelings were too tender and specific. He couldn’t blame his desire for her on mere curiosity anymore either, or on the normal urges that pop up between crew mates on high stakes missions. He couldn’t even consider what they were doing just fucking anymore. In his mind he had started using other phrases; sleeping together, going to bed, being intimate, all things that had not been part of their initial agreement and were not considered casual, no strings attached sex. It was getting in his head and, unfortunately, Shepard had started to notice. She hadn’t said anything to him outright about his weird behaviour, but he could see that she wanted to. She was giving Garrus a chance to bring it up himself which, for obvious reasons, he couldn’t do.

In short, his stupid, achy, sentimental heart was dangerously close to ruining a good thing for him. Because, to be clear, this arrangement was a very good thing for Garrus. His battlefield chemistry with Shepard, which Garrus considered to be unmatched, so perfectly aligned that it sometimes made him want to believe in god just to have an explanation, paled in comparison to what they could do to one another in bed. It had taken them a while to get there, of course. Their first time had been so overshadowed by nerves and adrenaline and the sheer newness of it all that they had both been somewhat bumbling but, even then, it had been one of the best nights of his life. He had never been able to laugh with someone in bed, to clang his head against theirs wrong and not spoil the moment. It had been so exciting to have to learn someone’s body again, to be taught what she liked, to show her what he liked. They had been so eager, so well meaning and comfortable around each other that any awkwardness seemed endearing, and they were both quick studies.

He heard the shower start up. It was late, probably coming up on 2am, but Shepard hated going to bed sweaty and he’d put her through her paces that night, hoping to drown the memories of the young Asari who had playfully pulled Shepard’s hair at Afterlife and offered to take her home in memories of him, of the pleasure he could bring her. He was starting to worry that he’d been too rough. Shepard hadn’t said anything to make him feel that way, if anything she had seemed very receptive to the way his talons had dug into her hips and ass, but still. Garrus had been angry for a moment there and he never wanted to take that out on Shepard. If nothing else, she was his best friend. She had been there for him through everything, she didn’t deserve to become his punching bag just because his feelings got hurt.

Feeling guilty, Garrus followed the sound of the shower into the bathroom, crossing his arms over his carapace and merely watching for a moment. Shepard was so human. She was humming to herself, a tuneless melody that spoke to how satisfied she was. He could see the beginning of bruises on her hips and the slight outline of his teeth where he had bitten her shoulder and his guilt intensified. She just looked so…so vulnerable without her clothes or armor on. Her body curved and bent in places he couldn’t understand. Every inch of her was soft and unprotected, even her neck, chest and thighs which, he felt, should really have some sort of plating, if only to protect her main arteries. The smell of her shampoo, mixed with their lingering sex was heady and, as he watched her run her hands over her neck he could feel the first stirrings of arousal, but he pushed it down. She caught his eye and gave him that special knowing smile she reserved just for nights like his and beckoned him in. Garrus knew he shouldn’t, but he hated denying her anything, especially when it was something he also wanted desperately.

The warm rain felt wonderful against his plates, but it was nothing compared to Shepard’s water-slick skin beneath his palms. He licked a stripe down the back of her neck, letting his rough tongue scrape over the sensitive skin at the base of her ear and where her neck and shoulder met. She hummed her appreciation as he massaged her lower back, pulling her against his carapace and slowly moving his attention to her thighs.

“I’m sorry,” he said sincerely into her ear as he traced the blossoming bruises, “I-uh-I got a little carried away.”

She chuckled, “Yeah, you were really in it there, huh? Don’t apologize though, it was hot.”

He flushed, the skin of his torso and neck darkening slightly at the praise, “Still, I know I need to be more careful with-” he gestured with his talons.

Shepard rolled her eyes dramatically, turning to face him, “I’m not made of glass, Vakarian,” she reminded him leaning back against the shower wall and tugging him forward as she pressed her thigh in between his legs, “I’m not going to shatter if you squeeze me wrong.”

He groaned as her thigh pressed up against his groin plate, which was already loose and getting looser by the second.

“No, you won’t shatter,” he conceded, leaning his head down so his forehead was almost touching hers, his hands finding purchase on her lower back as he rolled his hips against her thigh, “but you might pop. You humans do have very thin skin.”

She chuckled, moving her hand up to absentmindedly scrape the back of his neck, “I trust you,” she said, her voice uncharacteristically tender.

Her eyes met his, wide and soft with affection and the complete acceptance she had always offered him so freely. He remembered that exact same look in her eye when she had first met him on the Citadel, when he’d told her about Dr Saleon, when he’d gone back to the Citadel. There had been something else in her eyes when she found him on Omega, a kind of frantic relief that still made him thrum with pleasure to remember, but the acceptance had never wavered. Whether he deserved it…well, he tried to. Spirits, he was always trying to. It was too easy to imagine things being different when she looked at him like that. If he wasn’t careful he would lose himself to the fantasy of them, so he pushed it away.

“Still,” he replied lamely, just to say something.

There was a moment of silence, Shepard’s gaze turning knowing as she waited, again, for an explanation of his behavior that wasn’t forthcoming.

“So,” Shepard eventually continued, “what got you so worked up, Vakarian? Could it have been that pretty little Human that was all over you at Afterlife?”

Garrus recoiled, genuinely stunned, “Excuse me?”

“Sarah,” she laughed, “you remember, she bought you those drinks to say thank you for helping me solve Nef’s murder?”

Garrus frowned, “The blonde?”

“Yes, the blonde!”

Garrus vaguely remembered her, but blonde was really the best he could do. At the time he had been preoccupied by the Asari and the hair pulling and all the giggling that was happening while he tried not to shatter the glass he was holding.

“No, she wasn’t-” Garrus started, “you think she was hitting on me?”

For a moment Shepard’s smile almost looked strained, but it vanished before he could be sure as she sighed dramatically and pushed off the wall. For a second she was flush against Garrus, making his breath catch in his throat and sending a bolt of desire straight to his cock, but then she just brushed by him, hopping out of the shower and wrapping herself in a towel.

“She was definitely hitting on you,” she continued, as though nothing had happened, “she even gave me her number to give to you.”

Garrus let out a breath of frustration, but secretly relished the teasing as he followed her out of the shower and back into the main bedroom.

“No she didn’t,” he insisted, “you’re making this up.”

“Swear to god,” Shepard insisted, rifling through her nightstand and pulling out an Afterlife napkin.

She passed it over to him, her wet fingers eating away at the corners of the paper but not yet blurring the little string of numbers written in loopy, black ink next to the name ‘Sarah’. There was another number too, and another name; ‘Ameera’, and Garrus felt that roiling, heavy jealousy sink into the pit of his stomach again.

“You didn’t give this to me,” he pointed out.

She snorted, having settled on the bed and now roughly towel drying her hair, “I was going to, but you were fairly, shall we say, preoccupied when you arrived here. Either way, I’m giving it to you now.”

Shepard was right, when he’d shown up at her cabin he’d barely given her time to say ‘come in’ before he was slipping his tongue into her mouth and dragging his talons down her sides, but he wasn’t in the mood to be reasonable and fair.

“Seems like I’m not the only one with an admirer,” he pointed out, “you-uh-you gonna call this Ameera person?”

Shepard shrugged, an inscrutable look on her face, “I hadn’t given it much thought, really,” she said, “seems like a big risk with everything going on. Plus,” she smiled at him, “I’m not sure I’m really looking for anything else right now.”

Garrus barely heard her.

His own jealousy was pounding in his head and, before he could think it through, he heard himself say, “You should. It would be nice to finally get a break from being the person in charge of keeping you satisfied. Maybe we should do a double date.”

She didn’t respond for a long time, just holding his gaze as something he couldn’t identify flickered across her face. Hurt maybe? Embarrassment? Whatever it was, it made Garrus feel like an ass, but he was still riding too high on pride and jealousy to admit he may have crossed a line.

“Is that what you want?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Garrus replied immediately, the lie coming easier than he had expected, “the blonde-” he checked her name on the tissue, “Sarah, was cute. Plus, we could use a night out, right?”

Shepard didn’t meet his eye, moving to her wardrobe and pulling on clothes, “Sure. You set it up with Sarah and I’ll call Ameera,” she said simply.

Garrus knew he’d messed up somewhere. The way Shepard was moving was mechanical, militaristic, the way she stripped down and armored up before missions rather than the lazy, teasing way she tended to get dressed when they were together. She didn’t try to look at or talk to him. She didn’t suggest that he get dressed, or tell him to leave, but he felt like he should anyway.

“Yeah, I-uh-” Garrus cleared his throat, slowly starting to pull his own clothes on, “I’ll do that. Is there anywhere on Omega you particularly want to go, or anything you want to do?”

Shepard shrugged with one shoulder, still not really looking at him as she buttoned up her pajama top, “Whatever you want, Garrus. You know Omega better than I do. Maybe ask Sarah.”

Ouch. Yeah, okay, he was definitely being dismissed. He wanted to take all this back, slip back into their little bubble of post-coital bliss, but he didn’t know how to. He wasn’t even sure what exactly had happened, but it was clear that he had shattered something delicate.

He stood, moving behind her and gently wrapping his arms around her waist. If she had been Turian, this would have been an explicitly sexual move, but he knew it wasn’t the same for humans. Still, he kept his touch gentle, pressing a soft kiss to the side of her head. Shepard froze, letting out a small breath, but otherwise did not react at all. Reluctantly, Garrus let go.

“Goodnight, Shepard.” he said, hoping she could hear the apology in his voice.

She gave him a weak, half-hearted smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes, “Night, Garrus.”

And as the door slid shut between them, leaving Garrus to make his way slowly to the crew quarters on his own, he couldn’t help but marvel that, this time, it was his mouth, not his heart, that was ruining a good thing.

—

As it turned out, Sarah was very sweet, very talkative and very boring. She seemed thrilled to be out with a Turian and especially one so handsome and rugged looking she kept reminding him. She had been so enthusiastic about the date when he called that it had actually made Garrus think that maybe it hadn’t been a terrible, impulsive mistake brought on by his own immaturity but, 20 minutes in and Garrus was already wondering if he could fake a Normandy emergency and bail. He was nervous and hyper alert, not out of a desire to have the date go well, but because he knew that Shepard and Ameera would be arriving any minute. Shepard, gentlewomen that she was, had insisted on picking Ameera up from her apartment and walking her to the place Garrus had selected, suggesting to Garrus that this would give them both time to get to know their dates one-on-one before all joining up for drinks.

Garrus had selected a hole-in-the-wall place where they played live music, but people could still have a conversation. They served good drinks for cheap and, with how dull Sarah was, Garrus was taking full advantage. Consequently, by the time Sarah squealed out a greeting and jumped up to hug the incoming guests, Garrus had already developed a bit of a buzz.

Which was a mistake.

He took one look at Shepard, saw her arm strung carelessly around Ameera’s waist, met her eyes and-spirits alive, what the fuck was he thinking? This whole thing was a fucking terrible idea. She looked good. More than good, she looked ravishing. She had wrapped her soft, curvy frame in a black dress that left very little to the imagination. Her shoulders were bare, the dress’ long sleeves falling down her upper arms in a way that screamed casual elegance. Her hair was styled so that it all fell over her left shoulder in soft waves. Her eyes were lined with black, her lips painted a deep blood red that he longed to smudge against her skin with his thumb. Worst of all, her waist was wrapped in something - a corset, the functional part of his brain supplied - which had been tightened to accentuate her already mesmerizing figure. He hadn’t even known she owned a corset. He also noticed, with a rush of possessiveness, that she had covered his bite mark with makeup. That wouldn’t do, a feral part of him whispered, that wouldn’t do at all.

When their eyes met the world went quiet for a moment. Nothing else existed. No one else mattered, just Garrus and Shepard. His Shepard. He wanted to pull her close and bury his head in her hair. He wanted to kiss that red lipstick right off her, he wanted to see it smeared across his chest plates as she trailed her lips along his torso and-

She looked away, smiling as Sarah - his actual date - jumped up and pulled her into a hug and the moment ended. Sound and movement returned to the world and Garrus found himself awkwardly greeting Ameera and doing the classic ‘haha, aren’t humans so strange with their random acts of public affection’ shtick as their dates talked and he tried to convince his body to calm down.

Ameera seemed nice, if a bit cool with him, her eyes flicking to Shepard with an air of possessiveness that he understood better than most. He almost wanted to laugh at the way the Asari kept a hand on her at all times, angling her body so that she was between Shepard and Sarah, as though Sarah was the threat rather than Garrus, whose genital plates were embarrassingly loose just from looking at Shepard.

“Sorry we’re late,” Shepard sighed, “the walk took a little longer than I had anticipated.”

“We got lost,” Ameera gushed, squeezing Shepard’s arm, “just too busy talking I suppose.”

Yeah right, Garrus thought to himself. How do you live on Omega and get lost on a walk? Still, he gritted his teeth and smiled.

“Oh, it’s no problem,” Sarah assured, “Garrus and I were having a lovely chat.”

Shepard’s eyes flicked to him, as though looking for his confirmation, and he forced himself to agree, “Yeah, glad you took your time.”

He ushered the new couple into the booth he had picked out and was immediately confronted by another unwitting mistake. He had picked a small circular booth that was far enough away from the stage to facilitate talking and private enough that no one was likely to notice the famous Commander Shepard. This meant that, when they all took their seats, and with Ameera insisting on being between her date and Sarah, Garrus found himself next to Shepard rather than across from her. He had been preparing to be across from her. As it was, her bare thigh was pressed against his leg, their torsos mere inches apart as they settled in. His breath caught in his throat and he was immensely grateful that no one at the table could register sub harmonics. There was a moment of tense silence.

“So, what’s everyone drinking?” Shepard asked, breaking the awkwardness with her casual, easy charm.

Conversation restarted, flowing more easily than he had feared, even as every nerve in his body seemed focussed on the tantalising pressure of Shepard’s leg against his own. This was going to be a long, long night.

—

By the time they slipped out of the bar Garrus had picked out, Shepard was wrecked. The constant scrape of his leg against hers, his voice so close to her ear, rumbling through her like a rockslide, the tension between them and the steady stream of drinks had left her feeling strung out and jittery. Ameera had, luckily, interpreted it as nerves. She had agreed to let Shepard walk her home which both made Shepard very happy and Garrus seemingly very unhappy. He had flared his mandibles in a way that, to her, read as aggression, but that Ameera seemed unphased by when she’d suggested it. Whatever it had meant, the sight had reminded Shepard of what it felt like to run her tongue along that mandible, how he moaned and sighed her name when she followed her tongue with her teeth and bit down on the soft skin of his jaw. The corset had been a dig. Honestly, her whole outfit had been a dig, and she was mortified to discover that she was the one suffering, not him.

The whole night had been a disaster. From the second she had arrived and seen that little blonde all over Garrus, she had known that there was no way this would work. No amount of friendship and desire to be the best companion to Garrus she could be could override her natural inclination to lose her shit when someone came for her man.

Not that Garrus was actually her man, she reminded herself. They weren’t anything, really. Just friends helping one another scratch an itch. They were like sparring partners, just naked sparring partners. That had been the agreement, casual, no attachments or obligations, just pure sex. She had thought she could handle doing things the Turian way but seeing Garrus with Sarah had felt like an omniblade to the gut. She was a soldier, she knew she could push her feelings down and put on a brave face but it was clear that their arrangement had to end, and sooner rather than later. How to tell Garrus that without revealing that she tripped and fallen into having a seismic, friendship ruining crush on him would be something she worked out later. Right now she just had to get through the night and make it back to her cabin so she could sob her eyes out in peace.

Right at that moment Ameera snapped her out of her sulking by squeezing her waist, and Shepard felt a pang of guilt. She really was lovely and charming, if a bit possessive. If things had been different-if Shepard could be different, then maybe-

“This is mine,” Ameera sighed, stopping outside the door.

There was a moment where Shepard wasn’t sure what to do.

“Well, I’ll-uh-oh!”

Before she could finish, Ameera had backed her up against a streetlamp and kissed her. Shepard froze for a second but then thought, fuck it. Ameera’s lips were soft, so much more like a human’s than Garrus’ and, as she slid her hands up into Shepard’s hair, she couldn’t help but sigh. Ameera definitely knew what she was doing. Her tongue, so short and smooth, teased Shepard’s bottom lip, asking for entrance, which Shepard granted instinctively. Ameera’s body was soft and forgiving where it pressed against her own, her hands were gentle and familiar as they carded through Shepard’s hair. It was nice. It was simple and all Shepard could think about was Garrus. When they broke apart, breathless, and panting, Ameera’s eyes were bright and sparkling and Shepard felt sick with wanting, sick with needing something she knew Ameera couldn’t give.

“Do you-do you want to come up?” she asked.

Shepard bit her lip, her mind and body warring with one another for a moment before she forcibly took a step back and shook her head, “Thank you for a lovely evening, Ameera.”

The Asari looked disappointed for a moment, but didn’t push, letting Shepard slip away into the night without insisting she call again. It was a relief. As the cold air bit into her skin, Shepard finally felt her head start to clear. Desire still pounded through her like a kick drum, but she could at least order her thoughts into something resembling coherence. The walk back to the Normandy’s docking station was long, long enough for Shepard to start planning the conversation she would have to have with Garrus sometime in the coming days. It broke her heart to even consider severing the connection they had been building. In all her years of service, no one had ever understood her the way Garrus did. No one had ever made her feel safer or more comfortable, no one could pull her out of her head and back into her body the way he could. He was her best friend, but he needed something she couldn’t give him and, as much as she wanted to cling to what they had, she had to love him enough to let him go.

EDI welcomed her back to the ship, which was silent and empty at this time of night. She took a deep breath, letting the familiar surroundings sooth her fraying nerves. She wondered if Garrus had even come back to the Normandy. Had Sarah made him the same offer Ameera had given Shepard? Had he accepted? She stepped into the elevator, torturing herself by imagining Sarah and Garrus tangled up together, his hands on her hips, her head thrown back as he tasted her neck. No awkward learning phase for them. No, Garrus knew how to pleasure human women now. At least she’d helped with that, she thought bitterly.

The elevator dinged, opening on the door to her cabin and Shepard sighed with relief, desperate to wash this horrific night off her as soon as possible. She stepped inside, catching a glimpse of herself reflected in the glass of the fishtank. At least she looked good. Kasumi had talked her into buy this dress on their last trip to the Citadel, she had to remember to-

“Garrus,” she said, shocked to find him sitting on the edge of her bed, holding his head with his elbows resting on his knees.

He looked up, his blue eyes dark with something that made her skin tingle, and let out a breath of his own, standing and making his way towards her quickly.

“Shepard,” he replied, his voice dripping with relief and some other emotion she couldn’t identify as he gripped her waist with one hand and cupped her face with the other. He brought his head down, resting his forehead against hers, “I wasn’t sure you were coming back.”

“I wasn’t sure you were coming back,” she replied, trying for a light tone and failing miserably, “Sarah seemed really into you.”

He growled, his hand tightening on her waist, “Fuck Sarah. Shepard, this whole night was-”

“I can’t do this anymore, Garrus,” she said quickly, forcing the words out before the comfort of his presence shook her resolve, “I’m sorry, I thought I could but I-” she detangled the bodies, taking half a step back and crossing her arms over her chest, “I just can’t.”

He looked like she had slapped him and Shepard felt her heart break just a little more at the confusion in his face.

“You can’t-what?” he asked, stepping towards her again, one arm still outstretched as though to hold her, “I don’t understand.”

Shepard was mortified to find that tears were pricking at the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill over and she tried to force them back with sheer willpower.

“I’m not a Turian,” she eventually said with a rueful laugh, “I thought I could handle sleeping with you and you sleeping with other people, but I can’t, alright? I’m a stupid fucking sentimental human and I just can’t have you all to myself at night and then watch you cozy up to other women during the day. It’s too hard, I can’t do it.”

Well, fuck. That was not what she had practiced. What happened to ‘the good of the mission’ and ‘too busy’ and ‘need to start getting more sleep’? She had so many lines prepared that didn’t boil down to ‘love me, love me, love me’ and that is what came out of her mouth? She felt vulnerable and exposed, like a bug under a microscope. All her ugliness was on display, all her insecurity, her jealousy, her weakness. She hated it. Every instinct told her she needed to bolt, but she felt like she was anchored to the ground, held in place by Garrus’s eyes on her, heavy and dark with expectation.

He was quiet for a long time before he let out a bark of harsh laughter, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

“What?”

He did grab her now, pulling her hips against his as he continued, “You think I want anyone else? You think I haven’t been going out of my fucking mind waiting for you to come back, just praying-praying, Shepard-that you weren’t off falling in love with that Asari somewhere?” His voice was frantic, words spilling out like water from a faucet that had been opened too wide. She opened her mouth to reply, but no words came out and Garrus just continued, “Every time that woman touched you I wanted to rip her arm off.” he traced her lips with one of his talons, his eyes flicking between following the path of his finger and holding her own, “Did you really think that coming home to me with your lipstick smudged, smelling like some other woman wouldn’t drive me insane?”

God almighty he was sexy when he was angry. She knew there were things she needed to unpack, feelings that needed discussing when the waves of relief stopped cresting over her, but all that seemed to matter was that Garrus wanted her. Garrus wanted her. Not just someone to take the edge off, but her specifically. He had been waiting for her, not just because he knew she was someone he could fuck, but because he was worried, he was jealous, he was hoping she would come back to him. It was almost too good to be true.

“You said this was what you wanted,” she pushed back, feeling the hot flame of desire pulse through her “I asked-I asked you, Garrus.”

“I lied!” he replied, “I was insecure and jealous and I lied. I’m a terrible Turian, Shepard, you know this. I haven’t wanted anyone but you since-since-” his voice trailed off and he squeezed her waist, suddenly shy.

No, no, no, she thought to herself, you’re not getting away from me this time. She slid her hands up his torso, letting her fingers graze the soft skin of his lower back in the way that made his muscles clench. He bit back a moan and she felt her body respond in kind.

“Since when?” she asked breathlessly.

“Shepard-”

“Tell me,” she insisted, “you made me sit through three hours of drinks while watching Sarah’s hand climb steadily up your thigh, you owe me.”

“You showed up dressed like this,” he countered, his left hand dragging over the corset’s boning, “we’re even.”

“Garrus,” she warned.

He sighed, “Omega. The moment I saw you through my scope.”

“You shot me,” she reminded him, her whole body flooding with warmth.

He let out a breath of laughter, “You were taking your sweet time. I needed you to-” he sighed, leaning in and nuzzling into the crook of her neck, “I needed you.”

“That’s a long time to wait,” she said.

He let out a shaking, shuddering breath, “You have no idea.”

“Oh, yeah?” she teased, hooking her fingers under his jaw and gently forcing him to meet her eye, “try me.”

She pulled him close, pressing her lips to his and pouring every ounce of pent up loneliness and confusion and jealousy into him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed herself against him, sighing when he immediately returned her affection in kind. God, how could she ever have doubted that this man wanted her? How could she not have assumed that they were in this together, the way they had been in everything else together? His hands wrapped around her back, toying with the ribbons of her corset before sliding down to grip her ass. His tongue scraped against her teeth and she could feel his groin plates shifting to make space for his cock to press against her stomach. His body was hard and unforgiving beneath her, his hands were sharp where they dug into her skin. They were incompatible, two people that evolution had never meant to meet and yet all she could think as he moved his mouth down her neck was yes, yes, yes.

He was alien, but he was completely hers and, as his reverent touch grew harsher and more frantic, she knew they would fight like hell to get back to each other, come what may. Garrus nipped at her neck, backing her up against the fishtank as his hands travelled past her ass to the back of her thighs. She whimpered as the coolness of the tank against her back clashed with the sharpness of his talons scraping against her soft skin. Her core was aching. She bucked into his hips, chasing a friction she knew he wouldn’t provide until he was good and ready, but relishing the deep groan it pulled out of him anyway as she pressed herself against his dick.

“Garrus-” she breathed.

He ignored her, engrossed in his task of lavishing the column of her throat and cleavage with attention. As his tongue dragged across the skin of her breasts, which were pushed up and on display thanks to the corset, his talons continued their exploration of her thighs, moving from just below the curve of her ass, down and around until they were toying with the skin just below the hem of her skirt. He loved teasing her this way, only applying enough pressure to make her skin dimple and keep her painfully aware of how slowly he was moving.

“I swear, Garrus, if you rip my dress-” she started.

He chuckled and she flushed at the edge of desperation in his voice, “No, this dress should be put in a museum. It’s a cultural artifact. It’’l be the prosecution’s smoking gun when they find me dead tomorrow morning. No, there will be no ripping of the dress.”

Instead he merely slipped one of his hands beneath the hem, making her whine as he trailed his talons along her inner thigh, up, up, up-

She could hear his voice catching as he teased her, alternating between gripping her skin with his fingers and using his talons to hold her attention on the growing need between her legs. Garrus had a terrible habit of making her beg but, with the way his mandibles were flaring, his breath shaky and barely contained, she knew she wouldn’t have to wait long. She tilted his face up to hers, taking a second to press her lips to the mangled scar that covered so much of his right mandible. It was a small tenderness, a self-indulgent reminder that he was real, that he was there, that, despite the odds, he had survived. She loved that damn scar. She loved it more than anything else in the world even if she would never say it, but maybe he knew. Maybe he knew and that’s why it was that kiss that made his fragile resolve crack right down the middle.

Garrus made a sound that was half curse, half groan and there was the sound of ripping. Shepard felt her nice underwear slip down her thighs, completely wrecked and a pleasurable knot of anticipation coiled in her abdomen. She opened her mouth to say something sardonic and witty but it caught in her throat and became a gasp when he plunged two of his fingers into her heat. His fingers were long and thick, two of them at once, especially with no build up, sent a shock of that delicious pain that bordered on pleasure through her. She was tight, too tight. She could vaguely hear him whispering praises in her ear about that, telling her how badly he wanted to feel her clench around his cock, but it was all senseless noise dissolving into the feeling of fullness, the completeness of his fingers inside her, just gently brushing that spot that made her feel like she was dying. It was astonishing how wet she was, how immediately ready her body was to stretch to accommodate him, how much of a relief it was to have him fill her again, but he wouldn’t move. She needed him to fuck her with those fingers, but he held them still, forcing her to feel every inch of her body stretching to make room for him.

“F-oh god, fuck, Garrus-” she breathed, instinctively gripping his wrist as she stretched around his fingers.

He growled and kissed her hard, pressing his third finger to her clit, rubbing tight, soft little circles around it in that way that made her thighs tremble. His tongue in her mouth, the ice cold glass against her inflamed skin, his fingers inside her, her clit sending shockwaves of pleasure through every nerve in her body as his thumb traced it relentlessly, it was too much. It was always too much, but he didn’t stop because he knew how badly she wanted this, how much she craved the clashing sensations, how she needed him to take her apart completely before she could put herself back together again. He moved his mouth to her ear, sucking a dark bruise onto the skin at the corner of her jaw, timed perfectly to coincide with him thrusting his fingers into her. Her hips bucked, chasing the friction and she looked down.

“Oh, fuck,” she groaned.

There was something so goddamn hot about seeing Garrus’ hand beneath her skirt with the soft fabric bunched up over his forearm. She could just barely make out his fingers moving inside of her, so private and mysterious while her whole body melted into his touch. It was obscene. It was fucking holy. It was-

Garrus picked up his pace and her brain short circuited. Her head fell back against the fishtank, eyes fluttering shut as she sighed and moaned, her cunt clenching around his fingers as he wound her tighter and tighter, until she felt like she was about to snap. He was whispering praises into her ear that her translator couldn’t understand, but all that she registered was the sound of his voice. That voice, wrecked with wanting, strained like he was struggling to keep himself together as he brought her closer and closer to her peak. That voice that had always kept her sane, that had been driving her mad all evening, washing over her like a river. It was so perfectly Garrus, so she kissed him. She kissed him because she couldn’t think, couldn’t talk, couldn’t breathe while he fucked her open with his fingers. She kissed him because she needed more, and because her lipstick just looked so damn good on his skin and he moaned her name, his cock hard and throbbing where it pressed against her hip. She bucked into him again, grinding against his fingers as the coil inside her tightened and tightened and tightened until he crooked his fingers up and pressed them against that place inside her that made everything go white. It was good, and then it was really good and then it was better and then-oh god, fuck, fuck, yes, oh god, just like that, fuck-

She arched her back and cried out something broken and desperate as she came hard against his fingers, trembling and clenching around him as the aftershocks tore through her. He fucked her through it, his fingers moving more and more slowly as she came down from the high, his voice a constant soothing presence in her ear. When he kissed her next it was gentle, relieved even.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, pressing kisses to the side of her neck.

“And I’m yours,” she breathed, “just yours.”

She felt him react to that, his hips involuntarily bucking into her as he groaned. She smiled wickedly, pushing him back towards the bed. It was going to be a long, long night.

[the-artist-grimm]

Sooo, I kinda binge read all of your CoTL au, and forgive me if I missed anything, but do your lamb and Narinder ever make-up and work things out? Or more specifically, does Lamb ever forgive Narinder?

They do make up eventually! They just gotta work out other issues first.

The first few months the Lamb basically ignores Narinder and leaves him in the care of an elderly follower who typically takes on ‘troubled’ newbies. Anthea’s tired, they’re confused, they’re grieving Aym and Baal since during their time as vessel they essentially became like a second parent to them, and they’re hurt because for the first time in their life Anthea wanted something. They wanted to tell Narinder their feelings, they wanted to maybe start some sort of life together, like the lamb had never considered having a future out of the guilt of being the survivor, so finally letting themselves indulge that selfish wish just for it to crumble? Did he think so little of them, that an out of context conversation was enough to push him away? Forget him not respecting their privacy deal by listening in-that stung the most. Anthea puts their grief in a box and throws themselves into cult-leader/new god stuff to try and not have time to dwell outside of nightly visits to the graveyard to cry over their family and the twins’ graves. 

Meanwhile Narinder immediately regrets everything after the two of them have a massive argument that first moment he appeared on the indoctrination stone-he realizes he jumped the gun, is now down two children and the person he’d fallen in love with now refuses to so much as look at him. Nona, the elderly deer woman he’d been placed into the care of alongside the Knucklebones Gang as Anthea's parental figures quickly figure out the whole situation is just miscommunication and are trying to get him to just tell the lamb plainly ‘You were doing the exact same thing my siblings did before they betrayed me, I'm sorry I was scared-’, but its kinda hard to do when the lamb just avoids him. Plus he’s thinking he’s earned what he’s got. 

Aym and Baal getting revived is what kickstarts them slowly talking again. When Anthea gets the necklaces from the seller the lamb has no clue how to use them, so they go to Narinder with basically ‘We’re both at fault for their deaths, you’re at the graves as much as me mourning, I’ll put aside everything just please HELP ME’. And he does. Perfectly. Its been 4 months and Anthea’s having a really hard time justifying their anger since he’s been behaving the whole time, and when it comes to the twins only speaks in regards to resurrecting them, works on things/loses sleep preparing the ritual when the lamb has cult things to do, and when an old failsafe left by Shamura activates during the ritual itself he runs to the lambs side to help keep them steady as they break through it. They’re still hurt, but they do realize that they’re being a bit of a jerk ignoring him like this.

The twins also don’t come back mentally ok. Their deaths/the resurrection leaves both with pretty bad PTSD and separation anxiety (they’re like 11-12 they’re too young for all of this), and especially at night the twins alternate between needing Anthea, Narinder, or both nearby to sleep since despite Narinder’s denial he’s their dad 100%, and the Lamb is basically the twins’ maternal parent. It was Anthea being so good with the kits that got them to become friends at first, and it's the kits that slowly help them to be that again. 

It still takes time for them both to be ready to sit down and just explain where their heads were at that day. As Anthea frees the bishops and gets their sides of the story they realize just how much their behavior mirrored the bishops’ prior to their betrayal of Narinder and how much of their behavior in a way mirrors Shamura themself, the ‘oldest sibling’ giving pieces away till nothing was left and they snapped (Anthea never reached that point, but Shamura did with jumping the gun on imprisoning Narinder. Lives of the many over the one with potential to be a risk), and Narinder needs to come to terms with how his imprisonment came to be/make amends with his siblings.

They DO make up after a little over a year, and after everything kinda falls back into place. Things are different sure, but they love each other too much to hold back anymore.

(Love how this AU has become half miscommunication since this pantheon has no clue how to talk to each other, and the other half is the Lamb accidentally adopts two kittens with Narinder before they suddenly have a weird gotta share the kids despite the divorce arc)

[whilereadingandwalking]

I had a ball reading Get a Life, Chloe Brown by Talia Hibbert. Chloe is a chronically ill lady who has let her care for her fibromyalgia overwhelm her. After a near-death experience, she decides that it's time to start living with courage again. So she makes a list to push herself. And it just so happens that Red, the superintendent of her building, can help her with a few items. (Naturally, sexual tension and feelings follow.)

The romance was really enjoyable. The book deals with serious topics without getting too dramatic, allowing it to be a very cozy and realistic-feeling read. Not too many tropes, just a whole lot of sexual tension and spicy scenes and falling in love. Plus, moments of miscommunication do not become big huge chapters-long struggles (a romance novel pet peeve of mine).

I didn't expect the fibro representation to hit quite as hard as it did. I have relatively minor fibro, but I recognized my experiences so distinctly in Chloe's world, even if mine are turned down a few clicks on the dial. I've identified with characters before, but this is a specific issue I've never read about in this way, a plus-size woman with chronic pain who needs to be careful but still wants to be brave, who worries about people not sticking around due to the "extra trouble," whose days all too often are caught between how much we can afford to push ourselves and how much we'd love to get done. Whose days are marked by before fibro and after. I wasn't prepared for the way it made me want to cry, more than once, to read alongside Chloe's story of rediscovering her toughness. For that alone, this one gets high marks from me.

Content warnings for discussions of emotional and physical abuse, ableism, racism.

[femnoah]

Female Noah headcannons part 7

Part 1

Alejandro gets saved from the volcano in nearly every universe by Eva. Not because she likes him, but Neha would be sad if he was seriously injured and nobody is allowed to make either of her sisters sad.

Of course, they'd do the same for her.

Because of this, the worst injuries he gets are burns on one foot and bruises from being partially trampled on. But it also shows him that maybe not everyone on the cast hates him.

They become gym buddies (also bonding over anger issues) at the hotel and while Izzy likes to believe she was the main wingwoman for Alenoah thanks to her actions on the plane, Eva was the one who convinced him to talk to Neha and that 'he' didn't actually hate him for 'his' elimination.

Speaking of being sad (kinda like in cannon) when Neha actually gets upset she goes catatonic. She just dissociates from the situation and cause of this it's hard to get her to do anything, including eating or moving.

So far there's only been one sure way to bring her out of it and that's physical comfort from those she cares about (she has lashed out when somebody she didn't know touched her in that state, she didn't get aggressive but she panicked hard) and being reminded consistently about a reasonable and plausible solution to whatever caused this. She can't argue with good reason.

Despite popular belief, Neha does enjoy a good romance, not to the extent of Eva and a couple of her brothers (and Alejandro) though. The only problem is that she despises the miscommunication trope, which is in a lot of modern romances (it's why she prefers the classics). Why can't people just say what they mean? It'd cause far less problems.

Due to this she tends to be pretty upfront about her feelings for people. If she doesn't like someone, she'll tell them to their face.

If she does like someone then she makes it pretty clear- her insults are less vicious and more teasing, plus they actually get to spend time with her with minimal to no complaints.

If she really likes someone then she won't say anything straight away, she'll assess the situation first before deciding how to go about it, but in the end she will tell them. Just because she likes someone doesn't mean that it has to go anywhere after all. But it's really rare (one guy in the past) because usually people are too dumb or annoying to catch her attention.

Her mother and father got divorced when she was young.

Her father was a very prideful man who grew arrogant - and kinda sexist. He had 8 sons, all of which were prodigies! Clearly his genes are just superior.

Then his wife had a daughter not another son? which is ok, she'd just have to learn to be okay with being inferior to her amazing brothers.

Then it turns out she was also a prodigy what kind of 6 year old can hack into government files?! and was far more intelligent than his sons and him.

His wife may be fine with her daughter being a calculating and flippant charlatan but he was not about to let his sons be overshadowed and see themselves as inferior to her. He had to protect his family name and lineage!

Long story short he decides to get rid of her. You can decide how he does but I think he'd either try to sell her or put her up for adoption, but I guess it depends on how much angst you like.

Amrita (Neha's mother) finds out and is absolutely furious. She divorces him and gets a restraining order for her children, taking back her maiden name and goes back to live with her sister's family (at the time as her sister moves out later) and her mother in their generational home (which is b i g) and helps them with renovation and the upkeep using the money from her gigs.

Of course, she gives all of her children room to develop their skills, not allowing any jealousy to brew between them. She also makes sure that they all have other skills. All of her children have vocal training, can play one instrument (minus one of her sons who can play any), can cook to a suitable degree (once again, one of her sons is a genius in this area) and play at least one sport (guess what! She has a sports prodigy son!). She brought them up with her love of puzzles as well.

Izzy's case with her mother trying to push down her individuality and intelligence reminded Amrita of what had happened with her ex and Neha so of course she adopted the girl as soon as she could.

This event is the reason Neha's brothers are so protective over her, they almost failed her once and refuse to let it happen again.

The (vague) list of the areas Neha and her brothers specialise in:

Animals

Building stuff

People/politics

Fighting

Acting

Sports

Music

Cooking

Generalised intelligence

I feel like Alejandro and Neha would jam to EPIC. Neha loves classical stories (she's always liked the Odyssey, despite all the tragedy and revenge, it's also a story about devotion) and Alejandro likes to take any opportunity to be dramatic musical numbers and he does love a good story.

When they first listened to it together, he had a sappy look on his face because every song would cause her to perk up in recognition and explain the context or what actually happened in the original. He can't help it, the usually sarcastic girl was just so adorable when she went off on a tangent. He makes a note to ask her about classical literature more often, even if he's already read it.

Like, just imagine Alejandro singing Neha's name to Penelope's motif.

Or he and José acting out mutiny.

He takes every opportunity to sing out 'I'm just a man' often leaning on Neha for support while doing it. She'll huff and roll her eyes every time but both of them know that she's amused by his antics.

There was one time when she replied with "yeah, well I'm waaiiting" and he just stared at her before grinning broadly and peppering her face with kisses.

Next

[threepatchpodcast]

PRICE CHANGE ALERT:

Due to the LA wildfires and a miscommunication about a production detail, the cost of the book has risen dramatically. On 2/11/25, the cost of Tier 4 (Hardcover book) is going from $60 to $65. If you were planning on getting this tier, get it now! https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/the-three-patch-podcast-book/x/38366889#/

For full transparency, here is how the price change breaks down:

NEW cost breakdown:

Short-run digital printing 100 qty, 150-page book = $6,000 Taxes (9.5% for Los Angeles, California) = $570 Cost of proofs = same as before ($65/copy) Estimated shipping fees = same as before (around $500) Indiegogo platform fees (5%) plus transfer fees, etc. = same as before (around $500) ISBN registration = same as before ($125) ESTIMATED NEW TOTAL COST = $7,860

ESTIMATED PER BOOK COST = $78.60

As you can see, even with the price change, it doesn't cover all of our costs. We will rely on e-book sales and other cost cutting measures to come closer to breaking even, while also attempting to keep the book as affordable as possible.

GET THE BOOK BEFORE THE PRICE CHANGE:

[emo-nova]

Update time for some good ol' Teen Wolf, ig? i'm on episode 7 of season 2, and now I am definitely seeing some clips that i saw that was making me interested in the show as well as aspects within the fandom spaces.

Never understood the whole idea of Pack mom Stiles thing until I saw Stiles basically be the first to clock that 1, she is in seizure, 2, she may have an issue with the kanima venom (more than others) and 3, to be able to help her he needs to go to Derek cause Scott defo doesn't know. I didn't see it in the beginning, but I can see what people are seeing in it.

Another aspect, Stiles predicting Matt as the villain was such a rewarding scene. Mainly because I have been spoiled, I don't mind them, sometimes I actively look for them to see how the writers handle certain characters plus a summary isn't always true to what actually happened depending on interpretations.

You know what wasn't? Stiles' dad not being told. Or Melissa. Can these two be in on it now? Please? I'm mildly done with the charades on both ends mainly because the friction between two parties is simply miscommunication, plus it would be interesting to have Stiles' be open to this now so that we can see more of a struggle for the Stilinski family when the Sheriff *carries on* heading into danger when he knows. Same with Melissa, I think it would help create more stakes, but it will needed to be handled with care, that she can notice when a patient might have been involved with the supernatural which she can tell the sheriff. It'll make a good feedback loop for the adults, me thinks.

Onto Scott and Alison, I am noticing the writers are now ramping up a more heaviness to their relationship. This is no longer about puppy love but genuine wanting to carry on together, on both ends. And the touch with Jackson being used as the mouthpiece of the writers to foreshadow something more sinister lurking within Alison's future and her decisions. I honestly can not wait for Alison's either degression or progression as a character, as an aspiring writer who likes to study stories of any kind, I would have her digress to create a more nuance version of her character especially with her and Scott creating friction between each other. The friction I'm talking about is Alison's fear of being truly hopeless, unable to actually help herself out of a situation, this could be due to her being raised to be independent and to be a leader within the Argents. Scott on the other hand has a total Hero Complex, wanting to save as many people as possible, yada yada (mild affection now, he's grown on me), wants to be there for Alison *always* which contradicts Alison's want of independence.

Derek, so far, has been following a characterisation I would do for him (after that abysmal training set) cautious and careful with his betas, almost paranoid about their safety with mild disregard for his own in time of the full moon. I would like to see more Boyd though, you have an entire episode on him, and he doesn't get to appear in that scene??? BS, I want Boyd, Erica and Isaac have a moment of annoyance at Derek for being so careful with them. Would I have Derek explain to them why he's so cautious? Not fully, no, I would have Derek explain simply "I am your leader, I look after you and train you. And I need to look after you by ensuring you don't get caught between the Kamina and the Hunters."

Let Derek be a vague, paranoidly responsible Alpha that noticed that his first method didn't help for shit and changing the curriculum for these three because Scott's training was a *mess* and not some fucking dictator alpha guy. But knowing the writing team they most likely will mishandle Derek's character like a child given a machete in the garden which is disappointing.

That's all I got so far, but enjoy my ranting about what happened so far.

Also thank you to the kind soul that told me the timeline of season 1 and 2, I didn't realise that it was such short periods of time! Thank you again :)

[thecoolerliauditore]

the thing is I did always think GGGGG was gonna fall apart, even setting aside the people who were in it and their. rocky. relationship. 5 people is just not sustainable -- we've seen victors rise again and again either with one single partner or working alone for a reason. If you're on a team with 5 people, that's 4 people you have to remain on friendly terms with, 4 people you're supposed to look out for, 4 potential backstabbers.

Dogwarts was a large team with a very clear leader/followers dynamic, it fell apart due to disloyalty and disobedience towards its leader (as well as pride but. Y'know. Irrelevant). The Fairy Fort and BEST had season-defining betrayals happen within them that forced its members to pick sides. Southlanders, the only group that matches GGGGG in numbers exactly, was a total mess of miscommunication, hierarchical social structure, distrust, betrayal and eventually dissolved to its own insistence of sticking by its own rules (of completely abandoning reds).

The only large team (3+ members for most of the series -- I don't really count things like the late-game crastle alliance or the reds as a whole in LL) that hasn't ripped apart completely at the seams I'd argue is TIES, but they're a very unique situation in that they had the privilege of working off of BEST's blueprint and scapegoating Bdubs to minimize internal conflict. That and Skizz, I think, actually being quite an inspiring leader who may not be respected but really knows how to keep his teammates on friendly terms.

More people = more factors = more things that could go wrong. Numbers as an advantage only take you so far if you can't manage what's making up those numbers.

That Plus not only Pearl's baggage but also Bigb and Cleo's baggage AND the fact that two of its members, Impulse and Bigb, are known for operating independently and being lax about their loyalties is. Yeah.

And while Cleo and Scott have. Kind of? Taken up a co-leadership role, I'd argue neither of them are really bold and dumb enough to step up and take charge. As seen this episode when they disagree and simply leave it at that with no real conclusion reached. It's another element of directionless-ness in this already very unfortunate mix of people.

footnote: all said without mentioning the group's biggest issue in that it divides its own members but I think enough's been said in that regard, especially concerning Pearl's treatment specifically

[alexisomnias]

— "VIDIA" . . .

⤷ you're in a poly relationship with Idia Shroud and Vil Schoenheit!

requested by anonymous ,,,

featuring  VIL + IDIA

• idia was the last to join the relationship. it actually happened recently after his overblot, and vil was the one to take the initiative. Its not wrong to say you've had your own feelings for the Shroud heir, and you're quite pleased to hear that he felt the same!

• Idia is SO shy within the first step of the relationship! Vil is a literal MODEL, and you're so cool (you literally have dealt with 6 overblots!) and he's just... a nobody!!! (he literally is an heir of a well-rich company)

• Idia got so flustered when you and Vil wished to partake in video games, like seriously??? you and him having matching statuses, and message frequently on twistcord. In the off case, you two have matching profile pictures! Unfortunately Vil can't join in on the fun due to his company work...

• Vil is LITERALLY so worried about your guys' health. like does he seriously need to do everything? He always ALWAYS loves helping you and idia with selfcare! whether that be face masks and cucumbers, or braiding hair. he's a large fan of keeping mental health in tact! and he only wishes for you and idia to be healthy physically and mentally.

• you and vil make the most public appearances as a couple! for idia is much too shy, and when you're feeling shy yourself its completely fine too! it's not uncommon that your name comes up alongside vil's! or even idias! its shocking to some that somebody they've never heard of scored TWO rich baddies.

• you are the center of the relationship, as much as you three love eachother equally, they spoil you and engage in the most affection with you! of course if your comfortable. You're normally in the center of hugs and kisses, plus you get bought the most gifts. Vil and Idia would spoil eachother, but unfortunately they don't know all too much about their interests lmao

• speaking of interests, its a habit to listen to eachother ramble about them! its quite adorable, seeing two of the three listen intently to the other talking. It's definitely an act of love when i tell you listening is ALL that they do! And hopefully, you're a good listener too!

• vil definitely gives out the most positive affirmations! he NEEDS you and Idia to feel loved, and adored. (and if you experience anxiety like idia, worthy of him for you two are more then worthy.)

• you and Idia are Vil's number one supporters and fans stg, always there to hype him and any of his content up!! you guys watch his movies together and just PRAISE the hell out of his work! Always showing up to his events, meet and greets, or 

• Vil absolutely stands up for you two. NOBODY talks about HIS partners like that, nuh uh! He WILL absolutely ruin a persons reputation and make them feel like good for nothings if they even say a negative about you two

• you three actually are very good at communication! there's almost no miscommunication, holding off issues, and you guys talk when needed. Vil normally enforces it and gets you three for minor couple counselling (without the councilor) to ensure everything is going smoothly and everyone is happy!

• Vil organizes the most dates, he's quite good at choosing places you all like, and keeping you and idia comfortable and having fun. Lots of love with every date.

• Idia ADORES when you and Vil sleep over in his room! Oh how he loves the feeling of you and Vil in his comfort space :') makes him feel so safe and happy

• Ortho is your number 1 shipper lmao, he's idia's wingman, ensuring everything goes smoothly too! He's collectively your little brother,,,

[feralwritings]

three's company

pairings: steddie x reader

tags: plus-size!reader, no use of y/n, hurt/comfort, wound care in place of/leading to intimacy, vaginal fingering, piv sex, oral sex (m&f receiving), handjobs, no mentions of specific race or other physical characteristics besides body type

tags are subject to change as fic progresses!

warnings: 18+ mdni! body image issues, murder, graphic depictions of violence, physical violence towards women and men (no sexual violence), suicidal ideation if you squint, upside down brand of torture, body horror, gore, swearing, miscommunication as a plot device, flashbacks, ptsd, several near death experiences, references/use of drugs/alcohol, mention of hospitals/medical care, billy stans do NOT interact this fic could not be further from what you want cause this author hates his ass so much lol

word count: so many oh my god

summary: snapshots of that week in march 1986, and how three reckless idiots fall in love.

part one | part two | interlude I: 1985 | part three | part four

playlist