#incorrect chiron

[incorectpercyjackson]

Dionysus: It must be hard not being able to laugh.

Chiron: I do have a sense of humor, you know.

Dionysus: I’ve never heard you laugh before.

Chiron: I’ve never heard you say anything funny.

[pjotwitter]

NEW PROFILES JUST DROPPED ty for 700 followers love u all

[percabethownsmybutt]

percy: so, i got banned from the training arena because i'm apparently a "liability" and "reckless" and "jackson"

percy: that last one's just my name, but you should hear it the way chiron says it

[vampbloodbunny2]

Percy: one of my talents is being stress

Annabeth: do you mean being stressed?

Percy, looking at Chiron who's downing 6 aspirins: I don't think-

[book-place-incorrect-quotes]

Chiron: Just a reminder that Camp Halfblood offers therapy to those who need it

Y/N: Why does he always look at me when he says that?

[moonlit-typewriter]

The gods: we have made Demigods. Heroes.

Chiron: you fucked up perfectly good children is what you did. Look at them. They’ve got abandonment issues

[theydidntactuallysaythis]

chiron: you have to go on this quest, the fate of the world is at stake

percy: meh

grover: the fate of the world includes your mom

percy: YALL SHOULDA LED WITH THAT, ITS QUESTING TIME BITCHES

[nobodysavemysoulitsperfectlyfine]

Incorrect Percy Jackson Quotes as things my friends and I have said except I literally forgot the context.

Percy Jackson: "No. I will eat him. Swallow him whole. Shove him down my gullet. You underestimate how much I need him seasoned, battered, baked or fried."

Annabeth Chase: "No, the stupidest thing I've ever heard is anything Jk Rowling ever said."

Jason Grace: (screaming at the top of his lungs) "WHO EVEN IS JEMIMAH THE CONQUEROR??"

Leo Valdez: (breaking out into song whenever the room is quiet)

Piper Mclean: (In front of literal police) "It's because I stole it."

Frank Zhang: (Standing in front of a very wealthy house in the middle of the poorest county in the state) "What? I'm not rich."

Hazel Levesque: (Relentlessly being bullied for looking like a horse girl)

Nico Di Angelo: "I know it's midnight and we don't live here, but I really want to go out in the woods right now."

Will Sollace: "How could there possibly be THIS many things wrong with you?? What the hell?"

Chris Rodriguez: (Spamming calls and texts) "HOW COME EVERY TIME I TAKE COUGH MEDICINE I HAVE VIVID NIGHTMARES OF BEING IN FUCKING LEAGUE OF LEGENDS. I DON'T WANT THEM."

Octavian: "No, I'm really manipulative. It's gotten to a point where I don't even notice, but you guys should keep that in mind."

Reyna Avila Ramirez Allerano: (Aiming nerf guns stolen from a group of rotten kids) "JUSTICE!!"

Dakota: (Taking a drink of literally anything carbonated and visibly twitching uncomfortably) "Ew." (Drinking again) "Ew. Disgusting." (Drinking it again)

Mr. D: "Would you please STOP MAKING BABIES IF YOU DON'T WANT TO RAISE THEM."

Lester Papadopoulos: "How is it that every time a thunderstorm rolls around I have a psychotic break? Like, I have a feeling that's not just anxiety."

Meg Mcaffery: "I always thought Unicorns would be fatter."

Luke Castellan: "Guys, do you think I have bad morals?" (everyone saying yes in unison)

Alex Fierro: (Only ever using hoe as a pronoun when talking about someone to their face)

Magnus Chase: (Being forced to eat an orange peel covered in salt after saying he was bored while other people watched and recorded him gag)

Austin Lake:(Playing Sailor Song every moment he gets the chance)

Rachel Dare: "You know there's a Greek word for that? That describes exactly what you are?"

Georgina: "Right Now my Mom's waiting outside for and I quote "Biker Bitch". It's like a fairy tale."

Rhea: "I genuinely, and wholeheartedly believe that MOST of the world's problems would be solved if all men got a decent pegging. Every world leader, politician, everyone." (Continues to debate this perfectly for twenty minutes)

Ethan Nakumara: "Guys do your parents have nemisisees?"

Litreysis: "My entire face hates me."

Blitzen: "By Peach do you mean fruit or ass?"

Hearth: (Signing slurs in public to his boyfriend while smiling kindly)

Commodus: (Harassing the guy dressed up as Santa by repeatedly smacking his fake stomach and calling his ass a bowl full of jelly)

Thomas Jefferson Junior: "You're only a whore mentally."

Mallory Keen: (Prank calling some poor woman and screaming random scottish as loud as possible)

Marcus: "I'm gonna boil one of them alive and make the other watch."

Samirah Al Abbas: (frowning in response to seeing her friend's scores on the empathy test)

Arrow of Dodona: "Probably cause I am in the woods. They thought I got lost."

Ella The Harpy: (Rewrighting Heather's as a Biden x Trump musical with other world leaders as the Heathers)

I'm tired maybe I'll do more tomorrow or never

[all-da-ladies-luv-leoo]

Chiron: I don’t know why you have an issue with this. Annabeth was happy to comply.

Percy: So, what? Now I’m just supposed to do anything that Annabeth does? I mean, what if she jumped off a cliff?

Chiron: If Annabeth were to jump off a cliff, she would’ve done her due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry. So yes, if you see Annabeth jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Percy, frustrated: You jump off a cliff!

Chiron: Gladly. Provided Annabeth did first.

[incorrect-percabeth-quotes]

Annabeth: Athena made me the architect of olympus! I get to redesign the whole thing!

Percy: Um, I'm pretty sure she said you could make a few improvements, like adding statues.

Annabeth: And it was my job to make new cabins for the minor gods. Chiron said I did wonderful!

Percy: He's said your design was unusable and repurposed it as an expansion for the Hermes cabin. Tyson and his friends were the ones that made the new cabins.

Percy: Annabeth... you do realize that there's a reason why our fatal flaws are called "fatal?"

Annabeth: Yeah, I know. What does that have to do with anything?

Percy, grumbling: It has suddenly become painfully clear how my fatal flaw is going to kill me. By staying loyal to you and protecting you from everyone you piss off with your hubris.

[winter-rossie]

Chiron: Today, we Lost our Dear Camper, Percy. Percy: Quit Telling I'm Dead, Chiron! Chiron: Sometimes, I can still Hear his Voice.

[incorectpercyjackson]

Dionysus: Don’t you have class tomorrow?

Chiron, knocking back his fifth tequila shot: I’ll just show a video.

Dionysus: That’s why teachers show videos???

[pjotwitter]

[percabethownsmybutt]

grover, age 12: chiron, annabeth is gaslighting me!

annabeth, age 7: no, i’m not! you’re just crazy.

[freddie-77-ao3]

luke and lee hanging out in the morning, going over what they have to do today as the two head counselors: luke: ... and chiron wants to talk about malcolm's listening skills lee: oh well he has none, so that should be quick

[book-place-incorrect-quotes]

Chiron: *pointing at Y/N* See! Young people do Tai-Chi!

Grover: No, I think she’s searching for a wi-fi signal

Y/N: *in the distance* WHAT KIND OF A CAMP DOESN’T HAVE ANY SERVICE?!