#it also sounds different without headphones at all so just use headphones for the best experience

[teddybeartoji]

suguru geto is unbelievably captivating.

he catches your eye immediately – standing tall, he's got one hand on the subway pole to keep his balance. his hair is tucked into his hoodie with only a few strands left out to frame his face. you can only see his side profile but it's enough; a sharp, prominent jawline and a beautiful nose, thin eyebrows, a pierced lip and a pair of tired eyes. you feel bad for thinking it but the dark bags under them leave you no other option.

afternoon sun peeks from the windows behind him, successfully making the scene before you seem like a painting. the colors move; the shades of green flashing by as trees wave you goodbye, the different hues of the tired grays, of the big buildings taking up space as the base of the canvas. splashes of black and white and silver and beige are thrown into the mix, too. his slacks, his big headphones, his jewellery, his totebag. but what truly brings it all together, is his deep, dark maroon hoodie; there's a hint of purple in it aswell, and you just think it's one of the best colors you've ever seen. you figure the thought is a bit silly, but you can't get it out of your head.

something so comforting about it, something so warm and welcoming. something a little murky about it. you can't look away.

you forget about everybody else around you. for you, it's just him in this moment. a total stranger. you don't know him and you probably never will; a pang of hurt hits right under your ribs at the thought. you wonder what his name is, you wonder how his voice sounds. how warm his hands are, and what's his favourite color. no, he doesn't seem like the type to have a favourite color. childish. you'd have to ask about a favourite drink or a book perhaps instead. you're fine with that.

you can spot a few rings on his fingers, a silver watch and a bracelet or two peering from under his sleeve. his hands are pretty. they look good. you also think that you can see a tattoo sprouting from under the collar of his hoodie but the dark lines are blending in with the strands of his hair, so you can't be sure. you want to be sure.

your foot taps against the floor or the cart, your body itching to scoot a little closer to him. you want to see his whole face. you need to. fidgeting with your own fingers, you continue observing the man in front of you. he might step out every second now, you can't waste any more time.

his shoulder seem very broad, his posture almost immaculate. handsome – you think he looks very handsome. well put together. his clothes aren't wrinkled, there isn't a single hair or a speck of dust anywhere on them as far as you can see; the only things that betray his true state of being are his eyes.

purple. glued to the window in front of him, he watches... nothing. he seems a little out of it. he's not focused on the trees or the buildings, the people aside him. you think about what kind of music he might be listening to.

the subway doors open and you jolt, head turning around to look at the platform behind the glass. people stand and leave, and a few come in, leaving an open space for you to take on the bench you're currently sitting on. and you do take it.

there he is.

you can see his eyes a little better now. keen and sharp, he reminds you of a wolf. a malnourished one. the corners of his mouth are tilted down and he really does seem tired. but he's still utterly, utterly beautiful. his skin is almost perfect, his hair shiny and his lips a little glossy. but not too glossy though – no, he definitely uses something like shea butter. something that isn't too thick, something that doesn't smell or taste too strongly. it just seems right.

you've never been this captivated by a stranger before. it's weird. the effect this man has on you without ever even sparing you a glance. you think about asking for it. for a glance. for a second of his time. a fraction of it? anything. everything.

how would he greet you? would he be mad? would he think that you're bothering him? would he give you a smile? a scoff? an eyebrow raise? would he let you ask whatever your heart desires? or would he brush you off, never even removing his headphones when you try to speak to him? oh, it hurts. the blatantly fake heartbreak still hurts.

his trainers are clean - they're white with some accents on them. they match his hoodie. you wonder which he bought first. did he buy the other with the intent of wearing the two pieces together? you want to ask him. that's not his favourite color though, right? no, no – he wouldn't have one. this man reads books and watches movies that are mostly only shown at different festivals. you don't mind it.

films. foreign films. he knows names of the directors from the top of his head, he could probably name a few cinematographers, too. fancy. but that's not his main thing, definitely not. there's something missing, something you can't grasp with just your eyes. what is he passionate about? truly passionate. what does he pour his heart into? is that why he's exhausted? is he tired from loving something? is it starting to hurt now? is it overwhelming? does he want a break? does he want to rest? does he want to get away?

the sun finds your eye from behind his body, forcing you to tear your eyes from him. the cart stops again, the doors open. you try to rub out the slight burn, suddenly a bit frantical that you'll really lose him. you look up and—

he's not there.

he isn't there anymore.

people walk past you, plopping down beside you as you're still trying to find him. turning in your seat, you eye the station. maroon, maroon, maroon, maroon. c'mon, how fast does this man fucking walk?!

but he's just not there.

you think it's unbelievably unfair that it's the sun that made you lose him. isn't she supposed to be full of love? bullshit. with a huff, your shoulders slump and your eyes fall shut while sinking into the bench below you. the cart seems to rumble more now, the seat way more uncomfortable than it was a mere minute ago. you really are disappointed; in yourself and in the world. why didn't you get up? why didn't you speak to him? better to get a no than to drown in the million 'what if' questions in your head. stupid. you're stupid.

"hi."

as you listen to the voice recording of the station names, the very same ones you memorized years ago, you crack open your eyes. your own shoes stare back at you; they're dirtier than his were. you don't think too deeply about the comparison. sun dances on the ground before you, the various shapes entertaining your mind with the shadow play. but you don't stay for long; trailing up, you see the familiar paint and your heart skips a beat. white and maroon. black. maroon. silver.

purple.

[stunie]

SCARY BOYFRIEND EX PRIVILEGES! ���︎ — Endo Yamato x f!reader ﾉ Sfw ﾉ Cw harassment (not from Endo) ﾉ My response to:

ANON’S ASK — Random thought but what the wind breaker boys protect you in spite of being your ex. Whether it was a mutual, [etc], uncertain, or bittersweet break up is up to you.

Other warnings: one mention of reader typically wearing makeup

As weird as it sounds, you’re not entirely sure if you and Endo have ever officially broken up. Dating through high school was one thing, but keeping the relationship strong after attending different universities was another.

At the very least, you’re 90% sure the relationship died, although you don’t remember exactly when the two of you stopped talking. After you switched your phone number following your first semester at university, you hadn’t even bothered to tell him. You don’t remember why you didn’t bother to either.

Everything is weird now.

Life has been entirely different without him. There’s one less free pocket in your bag now that you’ve started carrying pepper spray with you. You wear your headphones in one ear at a time, and your volume isn’t on full blast anymore.

You actually look where you’re going, and you pay attention to the time— take a mental note that it starts getting dark earlier at this point in the year.

Even with the precautions you’ve learned during your time at university, this type of thing would always be out of your control. How in the world did you get singled out wearing your pajamas and no makeup?

Life wasn’t being fair to you.

“What’s a pretty thing like you doing here all alone?”

“Midterms.” You narrow your eyes to the best of your ability, balling your hands into little fists to mask how they’ve started to tremble. “I’m meeting up with some friends now.”

You used to be able to just say “I have a boyfriend.”

You also used to be walked home, so this wouldn’t have happened in the first place. You’re sure that if Endo saw the way you are now, he’d be making a comment by now. Something along the lines of “gonna hurt your hands if you throw a punch with your fists like that, sweet thing.”

Nothing is fair. Why is it now that you start missing him for the first time in years? The feeling comes a little too easily for a relationship that faded into nothing, but you’re too scared to kick yourself in the shin right now.

“That so?” The man in front of you laughs when your fight or flight finally starts to kick in. You take a couple of steps backward, and your frame is suddenly a lot smaller compared to his. How easy. “Where are these friends of yours? Can’t believe you’re out here all by yourself..”

“T-they have my location, y’know.”

There’s the stutter that always gives you away.

He laughs at this, and you can feel yourself breaking into a cold sweat. Keep your words steady. Ignore the way your heart rate is spiking. Do absolutely anything to avoid letting him know that you’re scared out of your mind.

It doesn’t work at all. “They won’t know if you don’t have your phone on you, will they?”

All the words you know seem to slip out of your brain, and your face feels painfully hot. “U-um…”

“You’re exactly my type. It’s a compliment… I’m being nice, so just come with me. You won’t regret it— I’ll make it worth your time.”

It doesn’t like sound an offer, and it doesn’t sound like a suggestion either. Your body freezes against your will, and he catches onto this pretty fast. The pepper spray in your bag seems too far away for you to even consider, and you’ve never felt so helpless in your life.

“Yeah? That sound good?” He moves to close the distance between the two of you with a grin, reaching out to grab your wrist. Your eyes slam shut, lips trembling even when you try to say something to protest. “Damn… you’re so docile for such a pretty girl. Usually, they’d be a bitch, but you—”

“How mean.” Your eyes shoot open when you’re suddenly tugged backward, gasping when your back roughly collides with someone’s chest. “I was waiting all alone. What’s my girl doing over here with you?”

The tattooed arms that drape themselves over your shoulders don’t look familiar at first glance, but the muscles and his scent are. Painfully familiar, as a matter of fact. They’re the same arms you used to cling onto- and you always used to wrap your fingers around his bicep and rest your head on his shoulder.

He loved that.

It all registers in your head as soon as he puts his weight on you, head right beside yours and you feel his hair tickle your neck. He gives the man in front of you an unamused look before turning to you.

“M-me?” You want to dig a hole and stay there for eternity after hearing just how shaky your voice comes out. Endo’s so close that you could simply turn your head to the side and you’d be kissing him.

He laughs, and you feel your face heat up again. Only this time, there’s a gentle fluttering of your heart that comes with it instead. “Yeah, you. What? Did you think I was talking to the loser? I wouldn’t dream of it.”

The way you move to latch onto his arm in an instant is all he needs to confirm that your feelings haven’t changed. The man in front of you doesn’t speak— he can’t seem to move either. Your boyfriend has made quite the name for himself, but you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?

To you, he’s your bodyguard— and more, of course, but maybe you’d be honest and tell him about that another time. But to that guy, he’s pure danger. The way Endo looks over his shoulder to give him one last glance is already enough to have his knees buckling.

[ham1lton]

TEN THINGS F1 DRIVER Y/N L/N CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT — GQ.

— part of my maneater series ꕤ

Y/N (throwing her hat in the air with one hand and catching it in the other without looking): see? told you i could do it! not my only party trick.

Y/N: hi gq! i’m y/n l/n, formula one driver and i’m here to show you my ten essentials.

NUMBER ONE: IPAD

Y/N: first, has to be my ipad. this was my first big purchase and seeing my bank account being drained of that money almost caused a heart attack. but this bad boy helps me to organise my life, stops me from being bored on flights, keeps me in contact with my family and lets me write my notes. so yeah, thanks apple. also you guys should sponsor me.

NUMBER TWO: NOISE CANCELLING HEADPHONES

Y/N: i never used to travel a lot. when i was younger, my family couldn’t afford it so flying around a lot was a big shock to my system. obviously as in f1, drivers are required to fly to different races and it means i had to get over my fear of flying. these help a lot with that. these plus a spotify playlist made by my angsty teenage self will make me forget about the fact i’m flying. these are my favourite ones, i have multiple pairs just in case.

NUMBER TWO AND A HALF: MUSIC.

Y/N: i guess this sort of goes off the second one? but music. i keep trying to bribe the engineers to build a blue tooth radio in the car but to no avail. spotify has been my biggest supporter all of these years. i know i’m sponsored by them now but i have been using my account for almost seven years now? so my algorithm is perfection. it truly has helped me so much. i listen to music on the way to races, on the way back from races, in my house, outside my house, cleaning, cooking and even when i’m in the shower. yes, i’m a shower singer. once i get in there, i’m beyoncé!

OFF SCREEN VOICE: what was the last song you listened to?

Y/N: one second, let me see. it was the twilight soundtrack, in particular, decode by paramore. told you i was an angsty teen!

NUMBER THREE: EMERGENCY BAG

Y/N: okay this sounds bad, it’s not as much an emergency bag as in like medical supplies but more so like extra toothbrush, toothpaste, menstrual products, lotion and other stuff like that. i always carry this with me anywhere in case my suitcase goes missing. it has helped me and my friends out so many times so it’s definitely an essential for me.

NUMBER FOUR: HER CAMERAS.

Y/N: i picked up photography relatively recently and this was the starter camera that the guy in the shop recommended. so this is that camera. for this one, i vlog, which you guys might have seen and this is the camera i use for those videos. i actually don’t record my videos, one of my friends or family or colleagues or whoever will film and i will be in front of the camera. it’s my favourite part when i ask the camera person to reveal themselves and they do their own little introduction. i obviously provide the camera for it. which is this beauty right here.

OFF SCREEN VOICE: who has been your favourite person to film you?

Y/N: i have had a lot of people film me. my most recent being rihanna for my recent holiday vlog! so many people to the point that i genuinely don’t think i could choose a favourite. i mean, i’ve had my sister do it a lot so i guess i can choose her. she knows my angles best!

NUMBER FIVE: LIPGLOSS

Y/N: when i won my first championship and i kissed the camera, the amount of calls from makeup companies my manager received was actually obscene. i think i got so many comments on social media asking what makeup i use and how it stays on throughout the race! to be honest, i don’t always wear makeup but in the original video, i was wearing this fenty gloss. it’s in the shade fu$$y. so, yeah, at least no one can call me a gatekeeper! i always keep it on me. i feel a little more ready to face the world with lipgloss. now, i have my own fenty collection! so check that out.

NUMBER SIX: HER LUCKY SHOES.

Y/N: okay i know i say i’m not necessarily a superstitious person but these shoes have been with me from f3 until now. every race i’ve worn these, i’ve won. so i like having them around. i think they bring luck. i can’t wear them any longer as they’ve worn through the soles now. really annoying but we power through.

NUMBER SEVEN: WINGSTOP BLACK CARD

Y/N: i was really craving wingstop one night. so me and my sister were in london? i think and i vlogged our hunt for wingstop and they reached out to me to give me a black card. i know, isn’t it gorgeous? i was so happy. too bad i have to cut down on what i eat thanks to my nutritionist, but my siblings and friends love this thing.

NUMBER EIGHT: SKINCARE ROUTINE

Y/N: okay, so i’m trying to get more consistent with my skincare but it’s not necessarily working the way i want it to. however, i still stick to the basics. sunscreen, cleanser and moisturiser. i really like keeping my skincare on check as there is this unsaid rule that women have to wear makeup in their jobs and if i keep my skin looking good then i can skirt that rule. i love this cream in particular, it’s moisturising but very light on the skin. best of both worlds.

NUMBER NINE: NECKLACE

Y/N: this was given to me as a gift from my family when i turned eighteen. it was a necklace that i’d had my eye on for a very, very long time. they saved up for so long to buy it for me and it’s become my signature piece. i wear it around my neck constantly. it’s weird having it off my neck to show you.

(she fastens it around her neck quickly)

Y/N: now i feel normal again.

NUMBER TEN: MY PADDOCK PASS

Y/N: i am so bad with keeping my paddock pass on me. for people who don’t know what this is, this allows me access to the garage and things like that. i usually keep it around my neck because if its in my pocket or my bag i’ll forget. my assistant sometimes carries mine. i’m not going to show you my picture because it’s awful. i had woke up really early after no sleep and one of the staff had made me take the picture. now i am forced to wear this monstrosity at work. i keep it hidden as much as i can. last time, lando saw it and laughed so hard he cried so yeah.

author’s note: this was hard as i wanted to keep it as vague as possible so that you can relate it to your own maneater! i’m still taking questions/asks/requests so please send some in!

[makochi-furin]

THE THREE WAYS THAT KAJI REN PROTECTS YOU

A/N: Hi, all. This is an example format of one of my types of structures for writing this sort of content. This is a hc-scenario mix :)

WARNING(s): sexual harassment, reader is backhanded (not by kaji)

—Kaji Ren doesn't play when it comes to his s/o. He's well known for his temper, and has quite a short fuse. That's why he wears his headphones and always has a sucker: so he can't hear someone talk shit and snap, and so he can't say anything back to make the confrontation worse. He actively does his best to control this part of him—the part that wants to break a mf's jaw. When it comes to his s/o, he's even more likely to temper it down. When it comes to someone messing with his s/o, bets are off

—He's very gentle with you. He's very aware of himself around you, and how he can be scary and rough around the edges. The last thing he wants is for you to feel unsafe in his presence, or scared of him. He really does his best to not act like a delinquent around you. Really. He tries so hard, yall

—You have probably heard of some of the things he's done, particularly from the townsfolk who go on and on about how amazing Bofurin is, and how they saved the town from different gangs and teams. Sure, you know he's strong, and you know he often gets into fights (that much is evident from the scratches and bruises he always has on him), but it's hard to connect your sweet, quiet boyfriend to the big, bad member of Bofurin who kicks ass and takes names like it's his job

—He's also very quiet, even around you. It's not intentional. Kaji is just a generally quiet person, and prefers to listen to you ramble about whatever more than talking about his own day (especially since his days usually consist of fighting). His fondness for you is quiet, too, but obvious to anyone who knows him. Sometimes, it's so subtle you don't even really notice. For example, he always walks road-side when you two take a walk through town; he somehow remembers EVERYTHING about you if you mention it even once (birthday, favorite color, favorite flower and food, etc...); when you two go on walks, he trails very slightly behind you, as if to watch your back; most of all, he takes his headphones off around you

—The school day was hard. You woke up late, you had forgotten to complete an assignment, and there was a pop quiz in your worst class. Not to mention, all of your friends were missing that day, out sick or at appointments, so you were left alone. Then, to make matters worse, you spilt your drink all over yourself at lunch. Several people laughed at you, and you had to walk around in your white, uniform button up that was stained and see through at the bottom.

Honestly, it was just an awful day.

You were getting ready to head home and crash, forgoing all of your homework, when your phone dinged right as you were about to catch the bus. With a sigh, you looked down at it, expecting it to be one of your parents ripping into you about a forgotten chore or something (with the day you'd been having, it wouldn't be a surprise).

Meet me at the bridge

From: Blondie

You couldn't help but give a weak smile. Your bed sounded nice, but honestly, venting to Ren sounded a lot nicer. You were practically on the verge of tears in the middle of the day, in disbelief about how awful your day had been. You could really use his presence, so you went.

The bridge was empty, thankfully, and Ren sitting on the railing and looking up at the clear, blue sky was a lonely sight until you joined him.

Without a word, you climbed up on the railing, sitting next to him. Your eyes fell to the river running below, enjoying the gentle sound of it flowing along. From here, you couldn't even really hear any other people on the streets. It was nice and calm, a welcome change from the rest of the day.

When he noticed you there, he looked over and started to smile. When he saw your sorry state, shirt all stained, a miserable expression on your face, red lined eyes, the smile fell immediately. He carefully placed his headphones to rest around his neck.

"Hey. You look awful. What's wrong?" He was blunt, but you'd learned he wasn't trying to be rude. He was simply straightforward. Unlike his rather plain voice, though, his dark blue eyes stormed with concern.

Honestly, you probably just wanted to cry, but didn't want to embarrass yourself. Instead, you let your head fall, fidgeting with your hands in your lap to distract yourself as your legs hung limply over the railing.

"It was just a really bad day," you explained with a pitiful voice, cracking halfway through.

Ren stared at you for a second, and if you looked you'd probably see the cogs turning behind his eyes. He was kind of short circuiting. He wasn't great at these kinds of situations, but he cared for you so much that seeing you all sad and upset made him incredibly uncomfortable.

All he really knew to do was gently disconnect your hands from each other, taking one and lacing his long, slender fingers through it. He blinked at you when you looked up at him. Though his expression was still plain and rather stoic (he really just didn't know what to do), his voice was soft as he said, "Tell me about it."

You widened your eyes a bit. You two hadn't been together for very long, and honestly in the beginning, sometimes you wondered if he even really liked you. But, as your eyes fell to your connected hands, and then back up to his, you knew he did. He cared enough to give you his full, undivided attention, even picking up his phone to pause his music so it wouldn't be audible through the headphones.

For Ren, it was a pretty big deal.

You broke right then and there, venting to him about everything. You were just so overwhelmed that letting it out helped immensely. And unlike others, he didn't try to give advice, or anything like that. He just listened.

Then, at the end, he squeezed your hand gently. "I'm sorry your day's been so shit... But... It's okay now. It's over."

Afterwards, he probably bought you whatever you wanted for dinner, and then offered to help you with your homework so you could go right to pretending you didn't exist in your bed when you got home.

—He really is very new to this whole 'relationship' thing, but he does his very best. He's honestly just not the greatest at saying or doing the right thing, but, my god, does this poor boy try to

—There are other ways he protects you, too, than just being there for you and listening. There's also the more physical ways, obviously. He's very observational, despite popular belief, and is usually acutely aware of what's going on around him (and especially around you). His quick reflexes have saved you from a world of pain multiple times, particularly if you're clumsy

—One time, you asked him to go out shopping with you. You knew he wasn't huge on clothes, or anything, but you wanted the company and to spend some of his rare off time with him. Of course, he agreed.

"This is so cute. Don't you think?" you asked with a bright smile, holding out the top you'd found at a thrift store towards him.

He was behind you, leaning on the cement wall with one hand in his pockets and hangers with the other clothes you liked in the other. Ren only nodded, but that didn't deter you at this point.

You grinned, deciding to buy the top. Starting to walk towards him so he could hold this one, too, you failed to notice your shoe catching on the bottom of the metal rack. With a little yelp and widened eyes, you started to fall forward.

You heard the clattering of multiple hangers hitting the solid floor, but you were more worried about the fact that your head was about to hit the cement wall full on. Squeezing your eyes shut, you waited for impact, but it didn't come.

Instead, you felt your head hit something warm and marginally softer than cement. Opening your eyes, you let out a sigh of relief.

Ren had grabbed the back of your shirt, and then leaned over you to shield your head with his hand probably before it even registered to you that you were falling. He easily pulled you back up, careful not to step back until you caught your balance.

"Klutz," he muttered after giving you a once over, which immediately had you pouting, of course, and flushing pink. Ren smirked at the expression, much to your chagrin.

"Ren," you whined.

His smirk would rise into a true smile, then. His smiles were contagious and beautiful, reminding you of daybreak, when the scary night was finally gone and the sky was a gorgeous painting of pink, orange, and red.

You couldn't help but smile back.

"It's okay. I'll always save you from busting your ass," he said, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead that had you melting, regardless of the rough wording.

Sometimes, only sometimes, the boy had rizz.

—These are ways that Kaji protects you that you don't even really think about much, because they're so common. Emotionally, he tries his very hardest to always be there for you, to always be someone you can tell anything to. He doesn't judge you. He keeps you from hurting yourself accidentally, and is always there to catch you when you fall

—Maybe the only time you ever see him actually pissed (not bad argument pissed, but ready to throw hands pissed) is when you're being physically threatened somehow

—I can't stress this enough: he does not, under any circumstances, want you to see him fighting. He's still scared deep down that he'll black out and IT will happen. He'll lose sight and take out everyone around him. It scares him even when he's fighting with other members of Bofurin, so it definitely scares him around you. He does everything he can not to lose his temper around you: music, suckers, hell, even breathing techniques

—However, and this is a massive however, any mf who messes with you must be crazy as hell, especially if they know you're Kaji's girl, because my god he'll hit 'em with a scream AND his fists. That song RAHH—yeah, that's Kaji. He will not play

—You two were meeting up for a date at this cute, little diner in the city. As always, you were a little bit early, so you leaned back on the brick of the diner wall and looked up at the sunset.

Kaji had probably gotten caught up with something, but he'd make it in relatively good time. He always did. And if something really got in the way, he'd text you about it, probably with only one apology, but the next time you saw him he'd have wildflowers, or some other gift to give you to make it up.

You had dressed up pretty cute for this particular date, though. A nice, little diner with the gorgeous sunset as your backdrop? Yeah, you wanted to take photos and dress up a little for Ren. No matter how long you'd been dating him, the way he looked you up and down, a little blush just barely visible across his cheeks, always made your heart swell,

No matter how long you'd been dating, he still had a crush on you.

You were busy thinking about what you'd order, or what you'd talk to Ren about first, to notice the trio of men who were walking by.

They were older than you, at least a decade so, and they immediately stopped when one pointed you out.

"You look mighty nice," said the tallest one, and he was big like a bear. Rough-looking like one, too, with a roguish smirk and lustful eyes, he looked you up and down, but not in the way Ren did. When this man did it, you just felt gross, like you needed to cover up.

"T-Thank you," you muttered, crossing your arms over your chest and looking at the ground. You hoped they'd just keep walking, but they didn't. In fact, your worst fear was confirmed when they instead gathered around you, cornering you.

"You look pretty lonely out here all alone, too. Did you get stood up?" asked a much shorter man, staring unabashedly at your chest. "We can help you out, ya know."

"I'm good... Thank you," you said, trying to back up, but you were already leaning on a wall. "I don't want any trouble."

"No, no trouble at all. Just a good time," said bear man, taking a step closer, getting way too far into your personal space.

Your heart rate shot through the roof, but you were also frozen by fear. Against one man, maybe you had a chance. Against three with no weapons? You felt helpless, and you hated it.

"You gotta number?"

"I... um," you stumbled, feeling so stupid. "I have a boyfriend... Sorry." With that, you got off the wall and tried to squeeze past them, but bear man quickly snatched you back in place by your wrist, grip so hard it would definitely bruise.

Tears brimmed at your eyes. "That hurts," you cried, really beginning to fear for your safety now. You tried to rip your arm away, but it was no use. "Let go of me!" you finally yelled.

The one who hadn't spoken yet spat out, "Nice guys like us are constantly getting fucked over by girls like you. Where's your so-called boyfriend, huh?"

Bear man laughed, but quickly narrowed his eyes with rage the more you tried to tug yourself free. Finally, he had enough when you scratched at the top of his hand, and then he backhanded you pretty brutally.

A cry of pain escaped your lips, the left side of your face stinging terribly, particularly where his ring had left a nasty cut on your cheek. Finally, tears fell from your eyes. "He's real, and he's on his way. He's a member of Bofurin," you said weakly, hoping it would deter them.

Everyone knew what Bofurin was, after all.

To your horror and growing panic, they only laughed at you, though, even as you held your cut face and looked away. "Sure, sure," chuckled the short man, sounding very confident. "Where is he, then?"

"He's right here."

Immediately, you were crushed by an overwhelming wave of relief. Just his voice, as pissed off as he sounded, was enough to assure you that everything would be all right.

Ren would handle it.

The three men turned, immediately stepping away from you.

"Hey, man, we were just checking on your girl, ya know? We saw her fall and hit her head on the wall. Looked pretty nasty," said bear man, sharing tense looks with his buddies.

You couldn't bring yourself to say anything, too overwhelmed and shaken by what happened, so you just dropped your hand from your face and looked at Ren, who stared at you.

There was an inferno in his eyes. You could tell immediately. Otherwise, he looked perfectly calm, but this was the most angry you'd ever seen him, especially when he caught sight of the blood slowly dripping from the cut on your cheek.

It was weird, too, because usually Ren got hot angry. He yelled and cursed. This was calm, though. Too calm. This time, he was cold angry.

"Right," he said quietly, which immediately had the trio's tense shoulders falling with relief. Without ever taking his eyes from your's, Ren walked towards you.

You'd never been so happy to have a boyfriend who could intimidate people just by looking at them.

He wordlessly took off his headphones, gently setting them on your head, music blasting so loud it almost surprised you. You couldn't hear anything. Ren took the sucker out of his mouth and threw it to the side, which was very unlike him.

He always even kept the sticks and wrappers to throw away later.

Finally, with that storm still raging in his eyes, he sweetly kissed your nose, whispered, "Leave it to me," and turned you around so you were facing the wall.

You didn't move an inch, still too frazzled about what had happened, in your head about what could have happened. You weren’t sure you'd ever been so scared.

For about a minute, you just stared at the brick, tears falling from your eyes and stinging the open cut on your cheek. You flinched when the headphones were taken off your head, and then a gentle hand rested on your arm to turn you around.

Ren rested the headphones around his neck, and then silently wrapped his arms around you in a warm, comforting hug. He rested his chin on top of your head, squeezing you.

You relished in the comfort, squeezing you eyes closed against his chest, sure that if you looked around, you'd see three unconscious bodies lying beaten and bloodied on the ground.

His hand found your hair, fingers lightly scratching your scalp. "I'm sorry I'm late."

Still in shock from the events and taken aback by his soft tone, you couldn't help but smile weakly. "It's okay," you breathed, still not pulling away from him. You weren't sure you ever would.

"Let's go get you cleaned up," he said, leading you with a hand pressed against the arch of your back. While you stepped over bear man's unconscious form, Ren intentionally stomped right on his face, no doubt breaking his jaw by the sickening crack you heard, with a stoic expression as if he hadn't just done that.

Needless to say, he bought you a pocket knife and told you to let the air out of any bitch who cornered you again.

—Y'all, when I say this mf don't play, he DON'T PLAY. It's canon. Istg

[hellosmuttydarling]

Shower Time

Summary: Walking into the wrong place, at the wrong time, seems to work out in your and Rooster's favor. In which, some private time in the shower turns into something far better.

Warnings: Smut, masturbation, oral sex, fantasizing. MINORS DNI.

Rooster wiped the sweat off his face with his towel as he entered the locker room. He could hear the shower running already and realized with a small flash of annoyance that it would mean he'd have to wait. He sat on the bench next to his locker and was about to pop in his headphones when he heard a sound.

A moan, to be exact. Rooster froze as he heard another one coming from the direction of the showers. When he stopped and listened, he realized that it was definitely a moan and a very distinct moan of pleasure. Only one person could be in that shower right now, making sounds like that.

You. Something had been between you two since you'd met on the first day of training; chemistry mixed with the competitiveness of the training made for a very frustrating relationship, but he couldn't help but be attracted to you. You were gorgeous and a great pilot but beyond infuriating.

The next moan left no doubt of what you were doing in there, and he could feel the heat washing over his body, his dick already hardening in his athletic shorts. His hands gripped the bench so hard that his knuckles turned white, and with each succeeding sound you made, all he could think about was how badly he wanted to walk over there.

"Bradley…" the moan was quiet and breathless. If he hadn't had all of his focus on what was going on over in that shower, he might have missed it. His decision was made instantly; he stood up, dropping his things onto the bench and peeling his shirt off before he stalked over to the shower.

The sight of you simultaneously took his breath away and also turned him into a man possessed; there was no way he was leaving this shower without fucking you senseless. You were standing there, naked and soaking wet, the water from the shower pouring down your body, following all of your curves, with your legs slightly spread and your hand in between them, circling your clit with your thumb as you fucked yourself with your fingers.

You were oblivious to the fact that Rooster was even there. The tension and flirting from the last week and a half had driven you crazy all night till you found yourself at the gym on base at 5:30 am, trying desperately to let off some steam. It almost worked until Bradley Bradshaw, of all people, walked in and, before long, was glistening with sweat, his breath coming out in hard, short bursts. All you could think about was seeing him like this but in a completely different setting, with far fewer clothes, and instead of lifting weights, he'd be lifting you.

It became too much when paired with the heated looks between you two, so you bailed back to the locker room, planning on taking a very long, icy cold shower before training.

You didn't know how you ended up here, getting yourself off to the same dirty thoughts you'd had while watching him work out. You did know two things: First, you desperately needed a release, and second, you were almost there.

Your fingers were delving in and out of your folds, your other hand playing with your breasts, when the voice you last expected to hear came from way too close, and your eyes snapped open.

"Want some help with that, honey?"

Fuck.

There was no use in covering up; you knew he'd already seen your entire naked body and that he'd seen what you were just doing. He'd almost certainly heard you moaning his name, too.

Fuuuuuuck.

"You could have at least let me cum before interrupting me, Bradshaw." You did your best to sound nonchalant, and luckily, your face was already flushed, so he wouldn't be able to see the heat of embarrassment rising to your cheeks.

"Bradshaw, huh? Just a second ago, it was Bradley." He sauntered over to you, and you looked him up and down, taking in his incredibly delicious shirtless form.

"I'd call you Bradley again if you hadn't just ruined my orgasm." He finally reached you, stepped into your personal space, and backed you up until you were pressed against the cold tile of the shower. One of his hands came up to rest on the wall next to your head, and the other came to rest on your bare hip, his thumb rubbing circles into your skin. Your traitorous, dirty mind sending thoughts of what that would feel like somewhere else.

"I'm sorry. How about I make it up to you?" He'd leaned down so that your lips were a breath away from meeting his.

"And how are you planning to do that?"

"I'll show you right now if you'll let me." Bradley was ever the gentleman.

You didn't say anything in response, answering instead by pulling him in for a heated kiss. Kissing him was everything you'd hoped and dreamed it would be. He was a phenomenal kisser, clearly experienced, and while you hated to admit it, clearly dominated you in every delicious aspect.

There was no point in wasting time when he already knew you'd been about to cum at the thought of him. The hand on your hip quickly moved to your thigh to lift your leg and hook it around his hip so he could be closer to you.

You could feel how hard he was, even through the shorts he was still wearing; his cock was pressed against your stomach. You trailed your hand down his chest to his stomach, dipping just slightly underneath the waistband, enough to tease him just a little bit. His abs contracted under your touch, and his fists clenched at his sides. What little clothes he wore were quickly getting drenched under the shower spray, but he didn't seem to care at all.

You broke apart for air, and he immediately went for your neck, kissing and biting his way down; you moaned as he got to just the right spot. Hearing your reaction, he doubled down with a hard suck, sure to leave a bruise, but at that moment, you didn't care.

Your hand went into his shorts, grasping his dick firmly, and marveled at the size. You couldn't see it, but fuck could you feel it, and goddamn, did you want it inside you. His head dropped to your shoulder as you started to pump his length with your hand, a quiet groan escaping him.

"Fuck," It took all his willpower to stop you, pulling your hand away from him. "I believe I owe you something."

"Yes, you do." Before you could blink, he dropped to his knees in front of you, pulling your thigh up over his shoulder and slowly kissing his way up your thigh.

"What were you picturing? When you moaned my name?" He said as he inched higher, his positively sinful brown eyes locked on yours. Had his eyes always been this dark?

"Not this," he bit down lightly at the most sensitive part of your inner thigh. "You, inside me. My legs were on your shoulders as you fucked me against the wall, hard."

As a reward for answering his question, he finally moved right where you wanted him. He used his hand to separate your folds, and then his mouth was on your clit, his tongue starting slowly and softly before starting to work up his rhythm.

You were a mess of moaning and pleading. Rooster ate you out like a fucking professional, listening to every intake of breath and every moan, having quickly learned what you liked and how to use it to get you undone, and fast.

"Holy fuck," Soon, two of his fingers joined his efforts, delving inside you, matching the pace of his tongue. "Goddamn, Bradley…"

You knew there was no way you would last like this, not with how amazing he was making your body feel. You were practically seeing stars and were begging him not to stop. A true testament to his experience, he didn't slow down or speed up, knowing how close you were. He maintained the speed and rhythm that was already driving you crazy.

"Bradley… I'm going to cum…" You looked down at him, kneeling in front of you, leg thrown over his shoulder, dark eyes locked on yours, as he ate you out like he was on a fucking mission. The sight alone had you starting to fall over the edge, but when his fingers curled and hit just the right spot, you plummeted head-first into her orgasm. "Fuck!"

Another testament to his experience, he knew exactly what to do to prolong your orgasm without ruining it, leaving you a shaking, moaning mess. Soon, though, your flesh became far too sensitive, and you pulled him up to kiss him. You could taste yourself on his lips, on his mustache. You'd never been a big mustache girl, but on him, you loved it.

"Please tell me that you're going to fuck me now," you all but whined when you pulled apart. The answering smirk on his face promised delightful things.

"Your wish is my command," He pushed his shorts and underwear down his legs and kicked them to the side, and you finally got your first look at his hard cock. You thought it was big before when you'd felt it, but now you could see that it was huge, and for a second, you worried it might not even fit, but you decided that you didn't care. "Come here."

You obliged, wrapping your arms around his neck as he brought your lips back together and picked you up in one fluid motion. Your legs wrapped around his waist on instinct, and from the new position, you could feel the tip of his dick rubbing against you, and all you could think about was that you needed more. He pushed you back into the wall before pausing to look at you.

"Are you sure?" You both knew that after this, there would be no going back to how it used to be.

"Yes." It was all the confirmation he needed, pushing into you gently but firmly. You couldn't help but gasp at the intrusion, feeling mildly like you were being split in half, but it was both slightly painful and exquisite because you had never felt this full before. Your gasp was met with a deep moan from Rooster as he seated himself to the hilt.

"You're so fucking tight," He gave you a second to adjust, and when you nodded, he withdrew almost completely, just to bury himself nice and deep. He swallowed your moan with a kiss, your tongues battling for dominance as he fucked you slowly.

Soon that familiar pressure was building up slowly in your body, and you knew that when you came, you were going to cum hard.

"Hold on to me." You nodded, not able to form words as he shifted your legs from his waist to having the crook of your knees slung over his elbows, changing the angle and allowing him even deeper. With his next thrust, you almost screamed but managed to choke it down.

In this new position, he set a grueling pace, fucking you hard and fast, with you doing your damnedest to not be too loud, but the way he was fucking you made that incredibly difficult. You were getting so close to reaching that peak again when the door to the locker room opened and slammed shut. 

The two of you froze instantly, not wanting to be caught in a more than compromised position but unable to separate without making quite a bit of noise. You could make out a few muffled voices belonging to some of your squadmates but had no idea what they were saying. Someone must have noticed Rooster's things on the bench because soon they called out to him.

"Rooster? That you?" Fanboy called from far too close for comfort. The only bit of luck that seemed to be on your side was that even if one of them came into the showers, they wouldn't see any part of you besides your arms and legs, as opposed to the unobstructed view they'd have of Rooster's incredible ass and chiseled back.

"Yeah." His dick was still hard and practically pulsing inside you. Your brain and body were currently fighting a desperate battle over wanting to finish what they'd started but not wanting to be caught fucking on base, in the locker room, right before training.

"We're going to grab breakfast. Are you in?"

"Yeah, I'll, uh, meet you there."

"Sounds good." The voices drift further away, and you both hear the door again open and shut. Your head fell onto his shoulder, and you released the breath you'd held.

"It is, apparently, not my morning." You said against his skin, and he responded with a dry chuckle.

"Not mine, either." You gasped slightly as he gently pulled out and set you back on solid ground. You pulled away from him and took in his face for a second, the tensing in his jaw and darkened eyes. He was the picture of annoyance, and you were positive your face mirrored his.

"I'm going to get out of here before we risk being discovered, for real this time," you leaned up and kissed him one last time, purposefully keeping it short, not wanting to be any more sexually frustrated than you already were. "Come find me later?"

"You got it, honey." You rinsed off and headed out of the shower, ignoring every part of you that wanted to say fuck it and turn around.

[honeybeebytheseaa]

My Grandkid HC’s

ISABELA

Lesbian. I’m sorry I just can’t see her being into guys it just doesn’t work in my brain.

Also trans of the gender (mtf)

Since she’s dropped her perfect persona, Isabela has been pulling pranks, ESPECIALLY on known little shit head Camilo. He doesn’t know whether to be proud or extremely annoyed.

Can’t cook or bake she’ll set the kitchen aflame

Always walks barefoot on the grass

Has names for most of her plants, especially the cacti

Doesn’t really involve herself in farmers work unless there is an emergency.

Developed a skill for gardening without her gift, and continues to do so even once she’s gotten it back. There’s something special about watching plants grow over time.

She still makes bouquets for events, but they’ve lost their conservative look for something more ‘Isabela’

Unlike most of her family she doesn’t mind bugs (unless they are in her room)

Very high pain tolerance. Likely due to smiling all day and cacti thorns.

She still likes pastel colors but they aren’t high on her list of favorite colors, so she opts for darker colors when choosing cloths.

She used to bite people as a kid

Has conflicting feelings on animals because on one hand yeah they are cute on the other she has to shoo them away from eating her plants every other week

Has a large man eating plant named ‘Rosita’

Sometimes she’ll take whatever is in Mirabel’s hand, put it on a high shelf she cannot reach, and walk away.

Can actually be scarier then Luisa believe it or not

SNORES SO LOUDLY the only person who can handle it is her gf

Not big on physical affection and often uses gift giving as her way of showing love (platonically and romantically)

DOLORES

Incredible musician who could basically play any instrument you hand her

She sings lullabies to the younger family members

Personally I imagine her as the only straight grandkid but obvi she is supportive of lgbtq+ since half her family is apart of it

She wouldn’t come out of her room when she first got her gift, but her parents and a very supportive Isabela eventually coaxed her out

She has headphones painted red and gold by Mirabel

autism (vine boom sound effect)

As much as she loves Isabela and appreciates all of Luisa’s hardwork; out of her cousins her and Mira get along the best.

Speaking of that Isabela and Dolores’s relationship, much like Camilo and Mirabel’s, soured as the pressure to uphold the family name increased. Before the magic disappeared they basically ignored each other, but began to reconcile during the rebuild and became close again.

Her room is sound proof (I know people say otherwise idc she needs a BREAK) but during the night she’ll sometimes open her window since it’s much quieter

I do believe she has SOME control over her gift, and in order to hear very far she has to hold a hand against her ear. When she isn’t, things are amplified but not unbearable. She’s kinda just gotten used to it.

Dolores love language is, unsurprisingly, words of affirmation.

If she gets stressed and doesn’t have access to her headphones, she’ll listen for the nearest family members voice (Ex: her fathers laugh, her mothers ranting, Camilo’s jokes, Antonio communicating with his animals)

Gets in on Isabela’s pranks now and again. She is mostly polite but has a devious side, especially with her cousins and siblings.

LUISA

I still adhere to the concept Luisa has some sort of ‘calm’ room. Wether it be an amusement park or a sauna she deserves to have somewhere to destress

Has a pile of stuffed animals, each with different names

She actually does enjoy doing chores and being active, but struggles to find a stopping point and not overwork herself

She’s more then just brawn, and was always a sharp academic when she was in school

Women enjoyer women enjoyer

VERY physically affectionate she’s giving everyone hugs and crushing their bones

Her and Camilo get along very well after Casita’s rebuild. She likes his energy and ability to let loose, and Camilo respects all the work she does around the Encanto. They mesh well.

When she first got her gift she accidentally broke her dads hand

Her father used to teach her piano, though she sorta fell out of it the older she got. Since casita’s rebuild she’s picked it back up as a hobby.

A big animal person, second to Antonio. She likes patting the donkeys on the head if she gets the chance

Has a hard time sitting down to eat because she’s always getting ready to move

If you give her anything she’ll begin sobbing and thanking you (birthdays and Christmas are rough)

She puts the younger kids if air jail if she has to

She originally struggled to control her gift, and that made her scared to touch anyone in fear she’d hurt them. But Pepa helped Luisa find ways to control the strength as she had to learn with her weather

After she lost her gift she kept trying to move the church as a force of habit

Reads a lot of fantasy novels

Helps Antonio wrangle his animals

CAMILO

(This will be more brief as I have a whole post of HC’s for this mf)

Gay and trans can’t change my mind

Despite always being hungry he cannot stomach fish. Some other seafoods are fine but the smell of fish makes him ill.

Won’t say this out loud: he is kinda legitimately afraid of Isabela ever since he’s become the target of her pranks. No one knows true fear until you realize you are caught in a Isabela prank.

Camilo’s love language is a lot of things, but quality time is high up on his list as he likes living in the moment.

Is a very good artist but gets embarrassed when people try to look at his work

Despite being a stick he is surprisingly strong.

Him and Mirabel used to be close but sort lost that connection the older they got, and even began to fight and butt heads. I like to think they do eventually become close, but it takes a lot of conversation and time.

adhd and autism (vine boom sound effect)

used to bite people as a kid

He likes reading plays and will space out for hours thinking how something translates on a stage

Sometimes he stands in front of a mirror and goes ‘why why why why why why why w

MIRABEL

The silly!!!

Like Isabela: gift giving is her way of showing affection. She loves hand crafting gifts.

This is depressing but when she didn’t get her gift she drew a door on her wall hoping the magic would make it real

Once no one would wake up so she poured water on Camilo’s head and he screamed so loud it woke everyone else up

Mirabel looks extremely innocent but will literally try to stab anyone who bothers her with her sewing needle

She used to write simple picture books for Antonio when they roomed together

She DEF got her own room during the rebuild. Like imagine saving the miracle and your family is just like “anyway go back to the baby room lol” they wouldn’t do that to her

Bisexual icon love to see it

Has zero rizz I’m sorry queen but like she’s a girl failure by heart

Is a bit of old woman and can’t stay up too late without getting tired but in turn wakes up extremely early.

Not the best academic but obviously still very smart.

She’s an empath so if you begin crying she’ll start crying too she can’t help it

Is blinder than a bat if you take her glasses away she cannot see SHIT

ANTONIO

Don’t have too much on him since he is still a baby but I have a few!

His favorite animal is the jaguar! Hence the plushie and his closeness to Parce

He likes matching animals to people, and even has a few animals named after his family.

Animals often tend to just kinda… follow him. If he goes for a walk he might came back with some new friends.

I do think he’s a vegetarian. Maybe not a vegan but eating meat is not easy for him.

He doesn’t always go to his parents if he has nightmares, and will rotate between Dolores, Mirabel, and Camilo.

Kicks in his sleep

[keys-hellscape-1020]

Hobie With Autistic!Reader

A/N: I really wanted to try and make this a one-shot but I just couldn’t think of a good prompt so I resigned myself to headcannons. If you have a good prompt with an autistic reader though send it my way I would love to write it!! @juvenile-arm here u go hun <3 hope it’s to your liking! Sorry it took so long.

Hobie Brown x Autistic!gn!Reader

Summary: How Hobie Brown would act with an Autistic significant other.

Content: slight food aversion, mentions of overstimulation, mentions of meltdown, fluff

————

To begin, there is absolutely no feeling lesser because you’re not “normal”. That kind of thinking goes against everything Hobie believes in. You might not be “typical” but he isn’t either and he thinks it great that you’re not. It’s literally ingrained in you to fight the system and he loves that about you, even when you don’t.

You don’t have to worry about subtle social cues with Hobie, he’s the type to always say exactly what he means in plain language. Which is a blessing and a curse, but you appreciate it either way.

He’ll also really want you to meet his friends, but he understands that the pub might be to loud and crowded for your senses + having to meet new people and be social on top of that.

He’ll suggest that you all go to a park instead, his friends will probably question him briefly, as he not really the “let’s go have a picnic in a park” kind of person but once he explains that he wants you to meet them and you don’t like crowded spaces they’ll agree with no hesitation.

I have no doubt in my mind that Hobie’s friends are punk, or at least share his values. They want to meet the person who has their friend so smitten but not if that means you’ll be uncomfortable. Time for a bunch of punks to have a picnic in a park.

On the topic of his friends, he’ll absolutely want you to come to one of his performances, but he also doesn’t want you to get overstimulated. His solution is to have you sit on the side of the stage (where no one can see you) so you can still hear and see his performance but without having to be so crowded. He’ll also get you a pair of noise-canceling headphones for if the sound gets to much.

On a completely different note, food. I for one tend to hyper-fixate on foods super bad and that’s all I want to eat. Hobie won’t even question that, he’ll just ask if you want him to pick it up while he’s at the store. He’ll also work around any textures/flavors you might not like. When a recipe calls for an ingredient you don’t like but he does he’ll just pour your portion into a separate pan and keep cooking. It doesn’t bother him, so long as you wash the dishes.

On the subject of touch, if you say you don’t want to be touched right now he might pout for a moment but that will be all. He’ll bounce right back and just continue with his plans. His first love language is Physical touch but quality time is a close second and he’ll make do until you’re okay being touched again.

If you’re the type where overstimulation sneaks up on you Hobie will take to carrying a pair of earplugs, so if you start to have a meltdown you can put them in while he works on getting you both out of the environment that overstimulated you.

If you do end up getting overstimulated and having a meltdown he will get you to a quite, calm space as quickly as possible. Once there he’ll just sit with you, but he’s not the type to stare at you while you try to calm down (idk about y’all but I’ve had people do that). He’ll probably ask you before-hand what he can do that helps you. Whatever it is he’ll do his best to make it happen. He’ll probably hum a song under his breath, a gentle soft one, maybe a lullaby his mom used to sing to him when he was younger.

All in all this man doesn’t treat you like you’re different, these are things that he would do for any one he cares about if they need him to. A true provider through-and-through, and always there for you.

[misspickman]

“Will you stay with me? Tonight? I just— I’d feel better knowing you’re near.” make those bitches vulnerable

If anyone could explain the counterintuitive nature of the mind, Kon would listen, carefully, then disregard every bit of it. It would eat at him but ultimately he would not learn from it, as is the story of his life. It frustrated him to no end, and it made changing the habits he'd grown into no easier.

He'd just about made out a Tim-shaped figure at the door as the sudden light filled out the room. As the light hit, so did Kon's headache. He groaned and covered his face with one of Tim's many pillows scattered about the bed.

Tim startled, slow and unusually jumpy in his movements. Would you look at that? Kon was starting to sound like the resident Bat himself. Maybe there was some merit to watching Tim work, aside from getting to stare at his scrunched up face.

A second later he heard the soft click of the light switch again. He heaved a sigh, but stayed underneath the pillow, part for the dramatic effect, part because it actually made him feel better in some messed up placebo way.

He could hear Tim shuffling around the room, taking his suit off, his boots, all the while trying his best to keep it as quiet as possible. It didn't work but Kon could appreciate the thought. As the sounds of hard kevlar and leather hit the floor in a heap, the musky smell of sweat filled the room.

“Why are you in my room?” Tim asked, voice muffled and too loud.

“Bart is running laps upstairs and playing on his DS. Loudly.” Each one of his steps was like thrown pebbles making ripples in the water, if pebbles were sharp and hateful and ripples made your head scream in agony.

“That doesn't explain why you're in my room.”

Why was he? Kon's room was lead isolated for this exact purpose, keeping him cocooned from the onslaught of noises that scraped his brain raw at times like this. Kon's room also held the generally helpful set of noise cancelling headphones Tim had gotten for him. None of that mattered when Kon didn't want to be in his room.

He shrugged, and said matter-of-factly, “I didn't want to start the next Halloween movie without you.”

Tim groaned; a loud, guttural sound that Kon followed with a stifled whine. Even though it must have been obvious at this point, he didn't want Tim too aware of his problem. Kon liked to pretend he wasn't as transparent as he knew he was. He didn't enjoy it, but it was a matter of necessity for his survival.

The springs of his bed creaked as Tim sat down, the warm skin of his thigh brushing against Kon's feet. Internally Kon cursed himself for his depravity that made him overly aware of the fact that his friend was half naked right now, next to him, as if they hadn't seen each other in similar states of undress before. Even then Tim had been particularly touchy about this sort of thing; nakedness, intimacy, and who was Kon to preach to him? He had even less of a normal relationship with both. That only made him appreciate the moments when Tim was too exhausted to care about propriety.

Too bad he had a pillow over his face. Peeking over it would only make him more obvious and desperate. The older they got, the less excuses they had for being sort-of-undressed in front of each other. They were no longer clingy kids who hung off of each other half the time they spent together—mostly they weren't, at least. Kon didn't feel much different from the gangly sixteen year old he used to be. Except now, he knew why his eyes would linger on Tim when he'd pull his shirt over his head and his back muscles moved and made Kon's brain go huh.

Not that he was looking for excuses to see his buddy naked. He only appreciated them when they showed up, then felt strongly shamed by them.

“I'm not staying the night,” Tim said, and sunk Kon's heart. He made a pitiful little noise. “Don't whine. I have stuff to take care of.”

“Yeah,” Kon grumbled, “me.”

He could imagine the pointed arch of Tim's eyebrow. Hell, he could hear it in his voice. “I thought you were fine.”

And he was. Mainly. The magic bullet only grazed him, and the whole situation was honestly more ridiculous than anything else, barely endangering. Who the fuck makes a magic gun? People need to get their gimmicks together.

Just a graze still landed him at medbay, and he bitched at Tim the entire time there. Tim gave back as good as he got, proud and unbothered, while Kon was very much bothered.

“I am,” he admitted. But two could play this game. Kon had watched Tim fight and flinch each time he stepped wrong or swung his staff too hard. He wasn't an idiot. “How are you doing?”

For a moment Tim fell silent, thrown off. “I'm… okay? What?”

“I saw you limping,” Kon said, feeling just a bit guilty for acting smug about noticing something like this. It was not the sort of remark Tim could take lightly. “Did you sprain something?”

He knew Tim didn't. He was offering him an out, sort of, because he knew an active injury would be easier to admit to than a constant not-so passive pain. Tim liked to think he was pretty sleek, too.

“No,” he denied, as Kon assumed he would. “You're deflecting.”

“I don't want you to leave.”

Tim was easy to disarm with staunch vulnerability, not because he didn't believe it was there, but because he didn't know how to throw it back in your face. He could bicker with the best of them but if Kon offered some honesty and outright asked what he wanted, Tim found it impossible to say no.

“Me being here won't help with your headache,” Tim said. “Actually, it will only make it worse.”

That was true. Well, mostly. The constant movements and sounds every functioning body made would only add to the sum of it all, but it would help because Kon wanted him here.

Gently, Tim added, “You also probably shouldn't be staring at screens if your head hurts.”

How damn hypocritical was it of Tim to be dolling out preachy advice about being careful with your pains when he himself was planning to go jumping rooftops? “Don't tell me what to do.”

The headaches had been Kon's company for as long as he could remember using his powers, not Tim's. That, and the occasional thought of knocking his skull open that he entertained from time to time, were sources of momentary comfort. Didn't do much else, but he felt lighter with the ability to turn the pain in on himself twice folded.

“Would it kill you to accept help?” Tim asked.

“I am accepting your help. In the form of you sitting your ass down and watching the rest of this movie with me.”

Tim's eyebrow twitched. “I thought you didn't want to start it without me.”

He didn't, but it had taken Tim so long to get here and Kon desperately needed some horror movie shaped comfort if he was already lacking the friend shaped kind.

He rolled over on his back and lifted his arms in Tim's direction, in some form of a mocking plea. “I'm only five minutes in. Our friend Michael hasn't even showed up. Come on, man.”

“I don't even like those movies.”

Kon lifted the pillow off his face and looked at Tim, at his pale, fallen face and his unfocused eyes. His hair was half tied up and half falling around his face in oily strands. Kon thought he really, really needed a shower and a nap. He said none of that, only looked at him and hoped that he made a sad, pathetic sight.

“You don't have to watch. Will you just stay with me?” he asked, pleading; more sincere than he'd like to admit. “I’d feel better knowing you’re near.”

A flash of shock ran across Tim's face before he steeled it back to some semblance of a careful neutrality. It might have worked on someone less Tim-experienced, but it did not work on Kon.

“Don't be dramatic,” Tim muttered.

“I'm not,” Kon insisted. He stretched out one of his legs and folded a grimace. “A bullet grazed my poor ankle, you know. Ouch. It hurts so bad and I'd feel so much better if my mean friend stayed here and watched a movie with me.”

He could see Tim's apprehension at being called mean, even if he had to know Kon was just pulling his leg. Guilt tripping him. Same thing.

Tried and true process; it worked like magic.

“I know you're fine,” Tim said as he settled more comfortably on his portion of the bed. Kon saw how slow he moved, for Tim. Careful movements, aware of the spots where it hurt and how not to aggravate them. “Your poor patient play is not fooling me.”

Kon gasped. “How cruel. How mean! You'd be so harsh with your friend when he's suffering an ailment so severe?”

“Stop it,” Tim said, grumbly, but with a smile.

The wound stung a bit still. If Kon were smart, or any less stubborn, he would have sat in the Sun for an hour or two to get himself in top shape again. It sounded almost too easy when he thought of it that way. The Sun though, in a funny turn of events, hurt his eyes whenever he got like this, and didn't need more direct stimulants to make his life hell.

A bit of a sting on the surface was such a ridiculous little thing that it felt unnecessary to mention, especially when he knew well enough that if Tim got a whiff of it he'd get all up in his head about lingering magic effects and so on and so on, and it would take the rest of the night to shut him up. Kon didn't want that for either of them. He didn't want to end up back in medbay and he didn't want Tim stressed over nothing.

He balanced Tim's laptop on the edge of the bed. It made his headache spike, and got him squinting, but the movie wasn't going to play itself. He never noticed how much he used TTK in his daily life until it hurt him to do so.

Tim swatted at his hip. “Give me that.”

He took the laptop and set it up on a chair, while Kon made himself comfortable further up on the bed, to make more space for Tim. Not that he didn't like Tim so pressed up against him while in nothing but boxers but—but. Propriety. Very important.

Finally, with both of them settled on the bed, Kon hit play. On the screen, a gaggle of kids gathered around a TV screen as a jolly ad for a collection of Halloween masks started playing. Next to Kon, Tim laughed.

“What?” Kon asked, with a distinct feeling that he was the one being laughed at. It got him wary on instinct, but then it was Tim laughing—hard to be worried about that.

Tim brought up a hand to his face to cover his grin. His eyes didn't move from the screen, which bathed him in gentle blue light as the characters moved.

“I thought we were skipping the third part?” he asked.

“We're watching all of them.” Kon noted the way he avoided an answer. “Means no skipping. What kind of a dirty cheat do you take me for?”

Tim sighed. “Well, this one is—”

The possibility of Tim outright spoiling a movie for him almost made the headache go away entirely for a full three seconds. “Nuh-uh! Shut up! I'm watching!”

He stuck his uninjured leg in Tim's side in protest. It jostled him and Kon saw a brief grimace fly over his face and just as he was about to apologize, Tim's hand wrapped around his calf and squeezed.

He could never hurt Kon with his bare strength but he could inflict pressure. It was very effective. It got him quiet, it got him paying attention to the movie so his mind wouldn't start running wild.

“It's kind of catchy,” Kon muttered, feeling altogether dumb, subdued and flustered. “The jingle.”

Tim hummed, ominously, and Kon cursed him for having seen the movie before and being all sly about it. It made him all smug and insufferable and Kon… rather liked how that looked on him.

It occupied most of his brain space as he tried to follow the plot of the movie, because Tim kept his hand firm on his leg throughout. If pressed, he would insist that it was the overstimulation that made him so overly aware of the touch, but Kon knew it wouldn't be true. He knew Tim had nice hands; bony and rough with scars and cracks. Knowing it made him restless, almost guilty, like it wasn't for him to know.

He shifted to the side and Tim pulled his hand back. It wasn't awkward and stilted at all. Nope. There would be no reason for it to be weird, because Tim knew and doubted nothing.

When it was apparent that the mandatory sex scene was about to happen, Kon became very glad for the lack of physical contact between them. Even the proximity felt too palpable, too charged between them; to Kon, that is. He had no doubt Tim was having a good ol’ regular time watching a movie, oblivious to the tension radiating from his right.

Still, Kon snuck a glance at Tim, just in time to catch a pent up grimace on his face. He laughed.

With no real push behind it, Tim swatted at him. “Shush.”

“How old are you again?” Kon asked.

“I just think it's unnecessary for the movie,” Tim said, looking as uncomfortable with words leaving his mouth as he could. “No one does that—no, shut up, don't say anything. I know they do. That's not the point.”

While Tim got lost in his own points, Kon debated the level of potential weirdness and merit of a joke, and decided that it was not actually weird or creepy if what he'd be doing was clearly just trying to get on Tim's nerves.

He opened his mouth and saw Tim's face fall. “Rob, if you were a divorced doctor, and I a young lady on a mission—”

“Do not finish that sentence.”

See? Jokes. Never awkward. It certainly closed the topic of sex, which Kon was thankful for.

Not long after, Kon was watching an insect emerge from what remained of that woman's face, suddenly wide eyed and awake and paying attention. The camera stayed on the shot for long enough that he figured they'd spent a good deal of money on making it look as grisly as possible.

“I miss him,” he said, somewhat regretfully. Next to him, dozing off, Tim hummed in question. “Michael.”

Tim huffed and stretched, and that was enough to steer Kon's attention away from the scary movie once more. He resisted the urge to pinch Tim's exposed side, thinking it would be too weird, considering the everything of tonight.

Tim pulled his leg up and rested his chin on his knee with a sigh. “You're not the only person who felt this way.”

So Tim went on to tell him about the reception of the movie, about producer's intentions for the franchise, and Kon mostly tuned it out in favor of watching him talk and pay rapt attention to the movie at the same time. He would stop occasionally to point out a detail Kon wasn't following, and was instead starting to question Tim's initial distaste towards the movie.

“Are you watching?” Tim asked at one point. “I thought I had to stay here with you so you could watch.”

That had been the main excuse, yes, and Kon felt hot with shame at being caught looking. He turned back to the movie, the dull ache against his skull prompting him to shut his eyes for just a moment.

“Should I turn it off?” Tim asked, no accusation in it. Again, Kon found himself resisting the obvious smart choice. Go to sleep. Wake up maybe-mostly headacheless. Continue his life. He could be smart, or he could put his legs up in Tim's lap and continue half watching the movie that was steadily creeping him out.

Tim snorted at his silent protest but didn't complain. He took two pillows from Kon and piled them up behind himself to lean against, not quite stifling the soft whine as he rolled his shoulders.

The plot was starting to unravel with sudden speed, so Kon didn't get an excuse of a slow scene to question Tim about it. It wouldn't be appreciated either way, so he comforted himself with the knowledge that it had to be better this way. Kon couldn't exactly call Tim out on this without being called a hypocrite, but he could force Tim into taking a break. This way they were both ignoring their problems very professionally while not overworking themselves. A win-win situation, as far as Kon was concerned.

~~~

A crackle of a doorknob stirred Kon awake. Mostly awake, at least; his vision still swam as he blinked his eyes open, then decided it wasn't worth it.

A whisper came from a bit further away, then neared him. Tim spoke to him in a hushed tone. “Sorry. I was just leaving, I didn't mean to wake you.”

“Leaving?”

He could feel Tim hovering, but Kon was too sluggish in both his movements and thoughts to focus on any of it. A bit louder, with an underlying roughness to his voice that Kon associated with exhausting fights and mornings after, Tim said, “Movie's over.”

Right, the movie. Kon must have passed out right after it ended. He dimly remembered seeing the credits roll, in that dreamy, unfocused state of drifting away.

“You can stay,” Kon slurred. “It's your room.”

A clammy hand rested against his cheek, then the side of his forehead. Checking for fever, Kon thought. It was one of those habits people had and found hard to break, even though he himself couldn't get a traditional human fever.

“I don't have magic fever,” he said, because he knew that to be the sort of worry Tim would have. “My leg is fine, my blood is fine, where are you going?”

Kon rolled to his side, looking up at Tim all bleary eyed. He painted a special picture in the dark, as did most people, because they didn't count on anyone seeing them. Kon did; Kon could see Tim move his hand from his face and yawn silently, he could see how sleepy he was, face slack and expressionless.

“I was going to crash into your room,” Tim admitted.

Even half asleep, Kon knew that inviting Tim to stay in bed with him would be crossing some unspoken but well known boundary of a normal friendship. But the dark worked on him too, and the implicit safety of it made him stupid.

“Idiot.” He yawned. “Perfectly fine bed here.”

Tim politely ignored that suggestion. “How's your head? Feeling better?”  

He was sweet. Annoying in his worry, sometimes, but sweet. It was hard for Kon not to think so now, with one foot still in dreamland.

“Better if you stayed.”

Tim sighed softly. “I'm not crowding on this bed with you. You hog all the blankets.”

“And you snore,” Kon threw back, petulant, and was just a second too late to realize his mistake in it.

He could see a slow smile stretch across Tim's face. “All the more reason for me to leave.”

He got up from where he'd been crouching next to the bed with a quick good night said over the shoulder, and Kon watched him go, disappointed but not present enough to be an active participant in it. He was out cold again before Tim even shut the door behind himself, and in the morning the memory would seem more like a stray dream. Or so he would tell himself to avoid facing his own embarrassments.

[thealogie]

q&a report q&a report (late but better than never) q&a report i didn't catch quiiiite everything in detail but i did my very best

we got: dt ros watt (malcolm) jatinder singh randhawa (porter) cal macaninch (banquo) casper knopf (fleance, the kid actor) alasdair macrae (musician, murderer) annie grace (gentlewoman, musician) and i think? kathleen macinnes (singer)

the last three people all shuffled in a bit apart from each other after the round of everyone introducing themselves by name and character was already over so i'm not sure i caught them all accurately. i'll refer to people by first names

during the introduction round i think casper started introducing himself and got kid applause so the audience ended up giving every single person a sped up little round of applause like a cute lil call and response rhythm between introduction - applause of very specific short length which was kind of funny. the cast joined in for each others as well and everyone made funny faces while applauding.

most questions were asked by the moderator

question: What did you think about the production when they first heard about it? cal was confused but intrigued. a lot of "not sure how it was going to work or feel like". when david and cush got on it the binaural audio wasn't yet firmly part of the concept but he was intrigued by the approach through trauma and how that affects the macbeths' relationship.

question: Wow was it for them with the binaural audio knowing the experience is different for the audience? what do they think? dt: we don't quite now how it comes together. the sounds are all cued off us actors, not the other way around. all i know is without Laura we would be fucked! (Laura = live sound mixing person) ros: we never quite know how it sounds for the audience, we were able to put on headphones and experience scenes we're not in in rehearsal, but i want to watch the whole thing! the cue speakers have some stripped down sounds and music that are relevant for the actors. but the audio choices enabled us to create intimacy jatinder: i think it makes the audience better able to relate to mental health struggles and trauma, giving what happens in the characters heads into your heads and relate it to your own experience. i think everyone here in the room has some of their own experiences with mental health and… voices in their head

question to the musicians: how does your work add to the concept and experience? kathleen (i think mostly, but the other musicians might also have weighed in): music enables us to place the text in a very Scottish place, but without getting in the way of the text. The headphones make it possible that it mixes with all the layers, balancing between music, sounds and lines is possible thanks to the technology. you can have loudly, energetically played music but then mix it at a level where it doesn't interfere with lines, when usually you would have to play quietly to let the text come through, which creates a different atmosphere. kathleen: i was advised to sing when nobody is speaking and turn that to humming when somebody is. so it was also very useful to have the glass box and always see what is happening on stage.

question about the porter scene: how did that come to pass, especially making a more modern version out of it? jatinder: decided together with max to just play it and see where it goes, starting with improvisation and then fleshing it out. there was an interest in finding a modern equivalent to the original jokes that audiences would perceive in a similar way as audiences back then would have related to the original jokes. the scene purposefully takes a bit of the intensity out - basically an emotional intermission in the middle of this really intense and dark journey. but my job was also in the end of the scene to bring the audience back into it.

question to david: What makes you come back to the big parts? dt: Well, Max had a good idea and I like Max. I liked the idea of the themes of PTSD and child loss and I like the donmar warehouse. i performed here 20 years ago, which is remarkable because i'm in my mid twenties right now! (laughs all around). there's something a bit magical about this space and doing an olympic event of a part like this one in this intimate of a space.

audience member question to Casper (kid): What is your favorite bit of the play? casper: my favorite bits are the murdering… or the attempt to murder. (laughs all around) But no, seriously. I like scenes where I'm not being killed and I'm having a conversation with someone that's not about death. different cast member (not sure who): -Is- there even a scene like that? (everyone laughs) dt, turning to Casper kind of conspiratorially: My favorite bit every night is the audience's reaction to your neck getting broken. (raised eyebrows, nodding to the audience with a wide grin) That's always something.

audience member question: Do you notice the audience being different in any way with the headphones compared to your experiences in other plays? different cast members answer in bits and pieces (sometimes i have a vague memory who it was…) ros: with the headphones sometimes people are louder, sometimes i feel like you are more connected and zoned in on us! maybe because you don't have the opportunity to talk to your neighbor maybe… somebody else: i feel like it's very quiet and there is somehow less coughing than usual. (laughs around) i don't know why that is!!

audience member question: What other productions of macbeth influenced this one: [here be the the answer part with david's ian mckellen impression, see the other post] musicians (i think annie): we came straight, literally no break, from the RSC's macbeth production so we really had to empty our brains. there was no break in between, but the music is very different and Max's vision also very different, so we really had to unlearn parts

audience member question: The physical theatre stuff, the witch swarm, how did that come about? ros: We really tried to think more of what would be a physical representation of the voices in somebody's head. Everybody in Macbeth's life is watching, taunting, staring at him. It was always more about the intention of the movement, what these voices want to do to him and less what the movement itself is.

THANK YOU for transcribing all of this. I love getting an explanation for what the swarm of witches were meant to represent! It really did feel like a dance/feeling more than a literal scene and it’s fun to know that was sort of the intent. (Also the neck snapping bit - I also loved the audience’s reaction to that every night.)

[princehatterene]

yay my post got one like!!! time to ramble on about the one type of loud noise i actually like!!!

now presenting: theo rates nhl goal horns and goal songs (note: i don’t know if all of these are up to date, but i’ll do my best! ;w; also HEADPHONE USERS BEWARE)

anaheim ducks: the horn sounds really unique! really low pitched, spongebob’s alarm clock-esque. might be kinda hard to hear over the din of the crowd tho? the goal song (bro hymn by pennywise) is also iconic. i bet that sounds awesome in an arena. solid 7/10, not a whole lot else to say

arizona coyotes (rip): the horn itself is whatever but THE SONG……..MOTHERFUCKING HOWLIN’ FOR YOU BY THE BLACK KEYS??? AND THE COYOTE HOWL SOUND EFFECTS??? YOU CAN’T GET ANY BETTER THAN THAT. arizona y’all were fuckin robbed and i am so sorry for your loss. 7.5/10, the boring horn takes it down a bit sadly

boston bruins: i’m loathe to admit it cuz i have a vendetta against the bruins, but this entire combination goes stupid hard. yeah the song is overused in sports arenas but….man it just hits, i dunno what else to say. horn sounds really punchy and is super unique to boston. i’m gonna be a lil mean and give it an 8.5/10 instead of a 9. Fuck You Boston /j

buffalo sabres: this horn blows my tits clean off and Not in a good way. sounds pretty similar to nashville’s which we will get to in a bit. also i think they have individual goal songs for each player and honestly i think that’s a little lame. i like when a team is known for that one song ig, even if they change it frequently. 6/10

calgary flames: this combo also goes hard. i LOOOOOVE when goal horns have an actual harmony to them and aren’t just one solid mass of noise? don’t get me wrong the solid masses of noise also hit sometimes, but this sounds so so good. also a badass goal song. dyno-mite. 8/10

carolina hurricanes: it sure sounds like it’s being played thru a hurricane, that gets it at least a couple points for unintentional thematic harmony. song sounds cool, i like that it’s related to the state the team is located in. other than that the combo is alright i guess. 7/10

chicago blackhawks: the og goal horn! i gotta give it some flowers for that alone. also arguably The most iconic goal song. chelsea dagger you will always be famous. if only the team was actually good and we got to hear it more. 8.5/10

colorado avalanche: now THIS sounds like spongebob’s alarm clock. i was gonna give it flak for sounding too much like the golden knights but eh, i guess it’s different enough (theirs is eeeeever so slightly higher pitched—they are the same model horn tho). and the song is whatever i don’t care this team makes me irrationally angry. stop being good. cale makar and nathan mackinnon blend together in my head they are the same person you can’t change my mind. grr >:( 7/10

columbus blue jackets: first, some history: the team is based off of the blue uniforms the union soldiers wore in the civil war (ohio provided a lot of troops and supplies to the union), and their arena has a replica 1800s napoleon cannon that shoots a pyrotechnic round every time they score a goal or win a game. i'm not even a fan of the team and i pop off EVERY TIME that cannon goes off and for those about to rock starts playing. uhhh the goal horn itself is ok. 9/10

dallas stars: DALLAS. STARS. DALLAS. STARS. DALLAS. STARS. DALLAS. STARS. 8.5/10

detroit red wings: WE FINALLY HAVE A REAL GOAL HORN IN LITTLE CAESARS ARENA!!! the second link is the horrible recording we used to have from the old horn in joe louis arena. while i miss the old horn a lot, this new one is growing on me. also none of the links showcase it but our current goal song is that one part in without me by eminem where he goes "la la la la la", you know the one. i wouldn't call myself a huge eminem fan but i think it goes hard and i'm not sorry one bit. 10/10, totally not biased at all <3

edmonton oilers:

“bully horn” is right, that noise just stole my lunch money and shoved me in a locker.

...............it's been growing on me. 2/10 but in like? a good way? it's supposed to be intimidating, i get that, but also Ow My Fucking Ears

florida panthers: they LOVE that growl sound effect lmao. also this is the same model as detroit's new horn! sounds a tad bit different tho. they're another team that does individual goal songs now, but they used to have sweetness by jimmy eat world. huge L getting rid of that if you ask me. 6.5/10

los angeles kings: eh, it's ok. horn sounds pretty cool, but the song doesn't stand out. 5/10, maybe even a 4. i have no strong feelings whatsoever

minnesota wild: GODDDDD I LOVE THIS SONGGGGGG. people in the comments of the second link like "waahh crowd chant was better", don't you EVER disrespect the isley brothers in my presence. the horn sounds sick they have a working lighthouse that shoots fog in their arena they have an awesome logo they have marc-andre fleury i love you minnesota wild i love you so very much. 8.5/10

montreal canadiens: ough.....c'est magnifique. c'est super. i heard they changed the horn a little bit, adding a lower-pitched bell into the mix. here's what that sounds like. i really like the habs package overall! a classic sound for a classic team. a solid 8/10

nashville predators: oh this horn is CRUNCHY. i can't tell if that's a good or bad thing. i bet it sounds really cool irl. the goal songs are pretty great, as are the "HEY! YOU SUCK!" chants from the crowd. i have no strong feelings toward the team, but their goal combo is solid. 7/10

new jersey devils: OMG THEY HAVE A "YOU SUCK" CHANT TOO LMAO THAT'S GREAT. i've never payed too much attention to this team or their horn, and it's not bad! i like the siren that's in there. and their goal song too, wish i knew what it was. 7/10

new york islanders: ah yes, the iconic "YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!" chants. i know it originally comes from a wwe wrestler, but i could not tell you who that is lol. wrestling mutuals come thru... i also love how they have like three different songs/celebrations in here lol. the horn itself is ok. 7/10

new york rangers: haha the rangers don't have a real goal horn, everyone point and laugh!!! 🤣 i do like that it's a fire engine horn tho, that's admittedly really awesome. we love firefighters in this house. and for a recording it sounds pretty good. the song isn't too terribly interesting to me, but it's so quintessentially The New York Rangers that i can't be too mad at it. mmmmmm 6.5/10

ottawa senators: oooh i didn't notice how similar it was to montreal's! looks like it is the same manufacturer. interesting! <- fucking nerdass /lh

the song is fiiiiine. a little cliche. nice crowd participation in there tho. 6/10, i always forget this team exists LOL

philidelphia flyers: OOOOH THEIR HORN IS NICE AND CRUNCHY TOO... they also incorporate some wrestling into their celebrations! i don't know who becky lynch is but their theme is pretty cool! makes for a hype hockey goal song. 8/10

pittsburgh penguins: EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LISTEN TO THIS GOAL HORN NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE HARMONY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT SOUNDS SO TRIUMPHANT???? I POP OFF EVERY FUCKING TIME BRO HOW DOES IT SOUND THIS GOOD??????????????? the song is ok too, not my favorite but it'll do. 15/10, tickles my brain Just Right

san jose sharks: another good spongebob-esque HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK. also their goal song fucking RULES. big big fan of this one. 9/10

seattle kraken: girl if you don't release that motherfucking kraken i swear to god--

awesome sounding foghorn, absolutely based song choice, that's a solid 9/10

st. louis blues: nice sounding horn! i love the lower pitch that gets added in with the second little burst. but what really gets me is the organ playing when the saints go marching in....ough it makes me smile every time i hear it. the song after it is pretty hype too! just good vibes all around in st. louis. 8.5/10

tampa bay lightning: i meannnnnnn it's whatever. uninspired. their pregame show has this huge tesla coil and they play thunderstruck by ac/dc and that would be SUUUCH a better goal song than whatever bland stadium anthem this is. it'll be a no from me. 4/10

toronto maple leafs: i don't care what anyone says, as a stealth leafs fan, this goal song is not bad. it's unconventional for sure, but it grew on me after a while. the horn is just ok, sounds just like everyone else's. all these horns start to blend together after a while, yknow? but we're almost done! 6/10, maaaaybe 6.5. we could do better.

vancouver canucks: ooooh i like their songs a lot! don't you forget about me is also unconventional but i love that song too much to care. also unironic nickelback haters dni. sounds like they used to have holiday by green day too? based. the horn is also kinda like. harmoniously cacophonous, which i know is the oxymoron of the century, but it's not a bad thing. 8.5 or 9/10

vegas golden knights: goal song is fitting cuz panic! is from vegas, so that's pretty sick. and i guess i should say vegas is copying colorado's horn cuz colorado came first, but i don't like the avs so the knights get a pass from me. not much else to say tho. 8/10

washington capitals: THEY USED TO HAVE A COOL POLICE SIREN MIXED IN WITH THEIR HORN BUT THEY GOT RID OF IT AND IT PISSES ME OFF. 3/10, L + ratio + the siren was the best part + song isn't nearly interesting enough to be worth mentioning + crosby > ovi

winnipeg jets: and last but certainly not least, we have my second favorite horn in the league! it's a train whistle!! it's super unique and cool and i love how it sounds!! another one that just tickles my brain. i think the goal song with the added siren is super hype too. 10/10 yaaay yippee last one goes out with a bang :D

[sterlingarcher23]

Hearts....of ElMax

Certain aspects I already covered again and again in previous posts:

The text from "Lucas on the Line" perfectly describes what happened there even though it is at best secondary canon.

The rest speaks for itself. The revival scene was changed (or certain aspects differ from the script maybe to confuse both the actors & the potential reader, maybe for other reasons. Like it's describing a different "loop" or version. But the script gives us clues) but parts were adapted nonetheless for example the "heart" via a blood stain on El's shirt in shape of a heart. The rainbow isn't directly in the revival but they used something else instead: the spin.

I want to point the out the sounds used in the bottle scene (Givehimthemedicine postet about this, link down below) - when the bottle starts spinning (! Which is important bc ElMax always spins, probably a reference towards Quantum entanglement & time due to the use & clue of the Planck constant by Max Planck in S3 - a spin, loop or spiral.) a heartbeat sound file is used, gradually synced with the beeping of Max's heart monitor: They are syncing their hearts.

Instead of a pure description, here's the clip. I advise using headphones to hear it.

In the rainbow sequence (before the zooming effect around El's head) that glowing light at the center also resembles a heart...

...and the exit of the mind lair takes the form of a heart too.

"That's what holds this party together. Heart.... Without heart we'd all fall apart."-Will

And Max is at its center. She therefore is literally the heart of the party which is then confirmed by the text passage from Lucas on the Line describing the exact same scene. So, whose heart holds this party together? Is there more than one person potentially meant?

Hearts are also part of the conversation between El and Mike. She mentions Max and Mike is confused. Note that El is wearing Max's green scrunchie (and has Will's bear between herself and Mike - remember Hopper pointing something out between Mike & El?). So by proxy Max is figuratively on El's mind in this moment. Look at her fingers too when she reaches to his face and says she'd love him - she touches Billy's face more gently. Mike's face also looks more stunned, not disgusted, confused like....what if El subconsciously kissed someone else? Someone who is on her mind (=green scrunchie). End Mike probably felt that he wasn't meant which is why he looks befuddled and El's reaction seems genuine. Most of our actions in real life are influenced by our subconscious. And Stranger Things quite literally uses the subconscious for example when memories of El overlay and replace memories of Lucas for Max. That's her subconscious speaking.

Like when Mike says those words, El looks over too... Max? As if this line is there to indicate that her life started with... Max. "Are you real? Did I make you?" (Birth imagery, like El "born" out of a cat's paw, or memories of birth do appear in the show every now and then and at this moment, the dialogs and visuals indicate nothing like a normal birth or origin of El. An angel in disguise.)

But back to hearts:

Both hearts, of El and Max, stopped on the same day because of the same enemy. El and Max mirror these events too. And not by accident.

Both revived due to what exactly?...an electric shock? Aka 1.21 Gigawatts? Do El's telekinetic powers work similar to this, like a defibrillator and it's not just moving objects or is it a side effect? (In Season 4 El interacts with Max's physical representation in the Void btw - the electric shock is referenced by the 88mph which appear twice by proxy in the finale and a lightning bolt above El the stained glass window)

Or maybe it's something called "Telekinetic entanglement" - after all, this is fiction, not reality or realistic at all like Hopper's broken ankle proves how much the Duffers care about realism. Even science is a vehicle you use.

Sidenote: Telekinetic entanglement is an actual thought experiment by Johann Summhammer of the Technical University Vienna (2016) - no idea if this was ever on the Duffers radar but I guess they looked for some real science inspo for their scifi/supernatural show. So, it's possible that this may have had an influence. It's simple to make a bit of internet research, find articles or scientific papers and use all of this for your fictional universe. And the Duffers have technically spoken about this themselves.

Summhammer starts his paper with the words: "While looking for inspiring science fiction I discovered some demonstrations of how to do telekinesis on youtube." - it's about a YouTube Videos of a guy that supposedly uses telekinesis and Summhammer who makes this thought experiment, trying to look at this phenomenon from a scientific perspective namely: quantum physics. And the father so to speak of quantum physics is: Max Planck.

And I already had some thoughts about quantum mechanics entanglement before. - btw I'm no expect in these things but if I was like the Duffers, a writer, these kind of papers are a potential inspiration. You don't need to understand it or adapted as described, you just make some references, like visual clues, drop a dialog hint like the Planck constant and that's it.

But I digress - Both of their hearts stopped. You can clearly see a heart shaped blood stain on the right side of El's shirt, not the left. It's mirroring Max's heart which is on the left side - like the blue hair tie and yellow watch are on the left and right wrists if El and Max respectively.

Couple accessories & hearts mirrored. Seriously, how many characters have this amount of crazy details?

(The machine used is TECA NEUROSTAR MS-92B MS92B EMG Electromyography - probably used for the two graphs it shows and the blue & yellow buttons on it - blue and yellow. El and Max are connected through the two most consistent wardrobe choices, the blue hair tie and yellow watch)

The connections are made through several aspects: the aisle walk in the school, Running up that hill or RUTH/Ruth Nevada, the numbers like El being 5'6 and Max's trailer number being 56. - It's like this machine with blue and yellow buttons showing two very similar yet slightly different graphs, going crazy in the NINA scene when this happens:

Max: 'I could be your zoomer.' - it's not even subtle you just need to make a connection. That visual is deliberate. That's an El & Max connection made through this effect.

Another interesting detail is the magazine that El is reading in S3: Tiger Beat. Combining two elements, the "tiger" as a cat (or silver cat) and "beat" as in heartbeat. Her heartbeat subtlety transcending into Max's heart monitor in the bottle scene - Max is El's heart. And El is Max's beat. She made it work again (which is underlined by the script btw).

"Broken up over a breakup?" - It's worth noting that it clearly points to the fact that El and Mike had a breakup not a break. They are not together nor did they actually reunite (the Duffers are subtle and not so subtle at all at the same time when Max says "Ex-boyfriend"... but who believes a girl that gives "bad advice" - it actually wasn't bad advice more a very direct way to use dialog as a descriptive tool. And they do this all the time. It looks like bad or clunky dialog sometimes but it isn't. Dialog is code. We speak in code in general, you need a key to understand it.)

"Fiction, it's a mystery" yeah, agreed - the Duffers must have good laughs when they chose to use this. There are a few more elements but the one next to the breakup (yeah, the Duffers made it official in several ways that Mileven was dust at that point already) is the heart image "💜" that is used in the magazines uses to. Tiger/Cat - heart - beat. Like in the bottle scene.

Btw the examples I point out are not by accident in the show. The Duffers decided to use specific props from that time that fit their narrative (and certain elements may just be coincidence). Like another magazine El was reading that had a few elements in it that fit the story. That's it. It's not conspiracy, they just choose very thoroughly, very meticulously what they use as props.

Combine this imagery, the spinning of the bottle (ElMax is associated with spinning btw you know like fans that appear everywhere, hands on a clock, like time itself and the spin of particles that are entangled on a quantum level > A wrinkle in time or...a loop or better a spiral that we see in the revival), the heartbeat transitioning to Max's heart monitor and you have the visual and audio equivalent of the line "She puts a hand on Max's chest. On her heart" it's just translated into cinematic language with the heart shaped blood stain on El's shirt and her reaching out with that hand:

It's like later when El takes Max's hand/fingertips into hers that they again make a connection of hearts (even though we normally locate the heart on the left side, the imagery suggests that El's heart is actually on the right side.

Things can subtlety change meaning, this is true for this sentence from the script, and we can all agree that the Duffers use double or even triple meanings. I'll go into the details in another post: El is indicated to be "an angel in disguise" - Angels are spirits, ghosts. And disguise points to El's life, her whole existence is probably just a cover up (Hopper used those exact words) and what we see in her memories isn't necessarily the truth or better a version of it told from her own perspective.

That's been symbolized by her older own self image into the place of the much younger girl - since this is not the whole truth but her own point of view-version taking the place in the NINA memory, it is pretty obvious that these things happened but are taken out of context or lacking a second point of view (it's not necessarily a second timeline even though they are alluding to something like it)

Back to El and Max - they are clearly making a strong connection between them and as a narrative aspect, this goes beyond a regular ship of two girls in love. Connecting hearts, colors, dialog in this way isn't just a form of creating a cutesy ship especially with the cliffhanger ending of Season 4. It has a much more layered meaning.

"You try things on until you find something that feels like you." - "Like me?" - "Yeah. Not Hopper. Not Mike. You. " the dialog makes a full circle, so it's about something that feels like El.

El finds it. It's the same bottle that pointed to El in Max's mind. (And she has coke bottle magnets which represent two parts of half a bottle in her drawer.) "something that feels like you"

And Lucas?

El fought in the mind, Lucas in the physical world. They show us the two lovers of Max in their respective realms.

The love with El is for the mind. The love with Lucas for the physical world.

Yes, Lumax is Endgame - so is ElMax. And there's only one way to do it. El has to be the cure for Max. Max is El's heart. Quite literally. The Friday movie date has to happen, that's a simple writing technique, a promise which you probably can't see right now because Max is blind. However, never ask IF such an obvious lose thread is taken up by the writer, don't ask IF something will happen, ask HOW and WHY. It's not a simple answer, nothing necessarily lighthearted. Nonetheless it's quite moving and beautiful.

Btw if Byler is a romantic ship and a driving factor, so is ElMax. The latter definitely not fanon but canon without saying it out loud and thereforen ElMax gives Byler another reason to exist (although I think that Byler too will come with a catch). You could prove one with the other by not trying to get El out of the way but think about who she really loves.... El was never really in a relationship only what she thought it was and this even ended in Season 3 (remember that Max points out that Mike is El's ex-boyfriend?) and I like to quote Madeleine L'Engle: If we commit ourselves to one person for life, this is not, as many people think, a rejection of freedom; rather, it demands the courage to move into all the risks of freedom, and the risk of love which is permanent; into that love which is not possession but participation.

Just my 2 cents.

........................

PS: this post had several versions and English isn't my first language. So, sorry for potential errors I overlooked.

PPS: Givehimthemedicine post about hearts:

[captain-mj]

angels of digitalism part two please very very pretty please

Done!! Part 1 is right here

Soap pulled into the parking lot the next morning just in time to see Ghost fly by and park. Without Roach. He noticed a car he didn’t recognize and assumed they must’ve came separately today. 

“Hey Ghost!” Soap beamed at him as Ghost slipped off his helmet. He just had a neck gaiter on so Soap could see his fluffy blond hair. It was clearly bleached, having the unnatural platinum that came from doing so, 

“Johnny.” Ghost tilted his head at him and Soap almost tripped over air.

“Don’t remember telling you that name.”

“It was on your resume. Would you prefer I stick to Soap?” He looked at him, tilting his head. Ghost had the most puppy dog brown eyes that Soap had ever seen. It didn’t help that his hair fell in his face and that he could only be described as pretty. 

“No. It’s fine. Only you can call me that though, alright?”

Ghost’s eyes crinkled like he was smiling. “I’m glad I’m your favorite.” He started walking and Soap felt flustered as he started to walk after him. 

Soap looked up at him, hands going behind his back. “You uh… have any plans today?”

“Mostly rigging checks. I put the wires and harnesses up myself so I’m going to make sure they’re all solid.”

Soap frowned. “Don’t the venue owners handle that?”

“Don’t trust them. A lot of them don’t follow the same standard. Not putting Rudy and Roach at stake because of that.” 

“Also you. You’re also doing the fancy tricks this time right?”

Ghost shrugged. “Not the same. I fall, I recover. They fall and they… crack. I threw Rodolfo onto a bed once and it sounded like pop rocks.“ He sighed. Soap had to pause and really think about that. 

Did he have it wrong? Was Ghost dating Rodolfo and Alejandro was dating Roach? Where did that leave Alex? Was Alex dating anyone? 

Maybe if he was single… He was a strapping young man. 

Soap laughed and decided to change the subject. “You hurt your wrist so bad you can’t play guitar.”

Ghost was silent for a minute and Soap was wondered he offended him before laughed. “Fair enough. I did…” He rubbed his bandaged wrist. 

“How did you hurt yourself anyway?”

“Scraped it up on my bike. Someone pulled out in front of me too fast and I skidded across the road. More embarrassing than anything honestly.” 

Soap frowned. “You were in a fucking accident?? And that’s all that happened?”

“No. I’m just lying to you.”

“Oh.”

“Also, don’t trust any story Alex gives you about losing his leg. 50/50 chance he’s lying to you.” Ghost patted his shoulder and held the door open for him. 

Soap nodded and just got to work. He perched on the edge of the couch since Rodolfo was lounging on it, headphones in. Occasionally, he’d speak in spanish so Soap assumed he was on a call. Made sense, he was the manager. 

Soap started to draw again and tried out different methods and styles to see what might look best. 

Rodolfo sat up after a while and used the couch properly. He kicked his legs out and took his headphones off after saying goodbye in English. 

Soap hummed. “Who was that?”

“Alejandro Vargas. He’ll be dropping by later. You can ask for an autograph if you want but no pictures.” Rodolfo started to work on his tablet.

Soap shrugged. “Might get one for a friend of mine but I don’t actually like his music that much.”

“Me either but he’s a friend of everyone here.” 

Soap nodded and showed him what he had so far. 

“I like it. This it?”

“No. This is a rudimentary sketch.” Soap frowned, wondering if they seriously considered that worth the amount of money they were paying him and decided not to ask, lest his feelings get hurt. They didn’t really seem to get how art like this worked.

Rodolfo nodded and handed him roughly 40 bucks. “Coffee again. Need me to text it?”

“Nah, I still have the texts from yesterday.” Soap took the money and did a two finger salute. He once again got all of their drinks and handed them out. When he got to Ghost, he paused. “Uh, where is Roach?” He was trying not to look at Ghost who was hanging upside and shirtless. After working up there for the past hour, he must’ve gotten hot but that logical explanation did not erase that Ghost was fit and scarred and so damn attractive Soap was worried he’d get hard right then and there. 

Ghost glanced around. “He might be working with Alex. I think they were doing something with his outfit for the vocaloid.” He twisted himself in the ropes so he sat upright and took his drink. The position spread his legs and put a little strain on his arms, making them tense. Soap’s knees started feeling a little weak. 

Ghost drank some more and tilted his head. “You okay? You look really flushed?”

“I’m fine.” Soap smiled, noticing the tattoos circling Ghost’s arm. They were clearly covering some scarring. It looked rough, a bit like a dog or something had attacked him. “I’ll go find Roach.” He stepped away and went in the direction that Ghost pointed out to him. 

Soap watched Alex grab Roach’s hips and move him. Roach’s back arched a little and the image on screen just didn’t move. Alex sighed and put his head on Roach’s, almost pouting. 

Were they dating?? 

Alex glanced over, hand going around Roach’s waist. Roach leaned into him and they both either didn’t realize the position or simply didn’t care. Soap wasn’t sure how to handle that considering just yesterday Roach and Ghost had been tangled together. He stared for another minute before Alex snapped his fingers. “Hey, Soap, you alright?”

“Yeah. I’m good.” 

“Cool.” They took their drinks and got back to debugging the vocaloid. Roach would do certain moves and the vocaloid would just stop and freeze until it would snap into whatever position Roach was in. Alex was quickly getting annoyed and it was obvious. They went back and forth on it with them either moving around or standing still. 

Alex groaned. “Soap. Wear the costume.”

“What?”

“Wear the costume.” 

Roach started to strip and Soap stared blankly. “Why do I need to do this??�� When he was down to his underwear, he handed them to Soap. 

“I need Roach to help me at the computer so someone has to wear the suit.” 

Soap slowly took of his own clothes and quickly put on the outfit. Roach was a little slimmer than him so it was tight over his shoulders and ass. It was just leggins and a long sleeve shirt with wires so it wasn’t the most revealing, it was just tight. He listened to Alex’s explanations and watched Roach sign back at him. Roach had no shame in continuing to stand there in his underwear. It was hard for Soap not to look at him. They were musicians and performers, it made sense they were attractive, had to be honestly, but it was ridiculous just how hot Roach was. Slim figure, the exact opposite of Ghost, nice thighs and an even nicer ass. And the entire time, he’d bend over the laptop, back arching slightly. 

Was everyone here trying to kill him? What next? Alex taking his shirt off and pouring water over his head? Rodolfo speaking to him in spanish?? 

Was this flirting? Or were they just oblivious? They couldn’t be, right?

After a bit, the vocaloid followed the movements like they were supposed and Roach beamed at Soap. He reached up and lightly bonked their heads together before helping Soap out of the clothing. It felt more like he peeled the shirt off and it made him really flustered. Roach’s hands were very cold and they brushed against his back before he politely handed Soap’s shirt to him. He was clearly smiling and that made Soap even more flustered when he pulled it on. Soap nodded at him and fled, running back to his couch and his laptop. 

Except… Alejandro was sitting there. He was playing what looked like a knock off of candy crush and completely ignored Soap as he walked past him. 

“Hi.” 

Alejandro nodded at him. He sipped his drink and Soap picked up the tablet to get to work. The silence was… actually kinda nice. Soap wasn’t usually one that could handle sitting there without talking, but he was deep in his art and Alejandro was deep in typing whatever it was he was typing. 

Ghost reappeared and Alejandro wolf whistled at him. “What are you doing walking around like that?”

Ghost glared at him. “Fuck off you slag.” 

“Not my fault you’re a fine piece of ass.” Alejandro grinned and Ghost rolled his eyes and pulled his shirt back on. His back muscles flexed as he did. 

“You’re so annoying. Why are you here?”

“Tour just ended so I’m hanging out with you guys. Obviously. Why? Don’t love me anymore?”

Ghost shook his head and sat between them. Three big men on a couch was a bit of a hard fit, but Soap wasn’t going to complain. 

Soap showed Ghost who leaned into him to watch him draw. The silence was slightly less comfortable so he started explaining what techniques he was using. Ghost didn’t really seem to get it, but he listened nonetheless. 

Soap was coming to terms with the fact they were all a lot less cool than he was expecting, but it was nice. Maybe they could be friends when this was over.

[magecrafts]

Would you be willing to write a headcanon combo of all the characters you write for on how enthusiastically they’d listen/dance to Chappell Roan?

sure!!! she's been big on my spotify rotation lately so this was fun :) kate got the most attention w this one bc i just know she’s so into chappell but there's a lil bit for all of 'em. also established bishova by accident hello???

agatha knows who chappell is because she’s a tiktok lurker. calls her the twinkly little cowgirl. with a fond smile.

kate pretends she isn’t as big of a fan as she is because she’s trying this thing where she tamps down the stan behavior because it almost drove clint away. and because being a stan with manhattan penthouse money is detrimental to her allowance (which isn’t so much an allowance anymore as it is just … her money bc the feds have eleanor and kate has access to the accounts that haven’t been seized). it’s silly to try and pretend she doesn’t love the things she loves but it helps that she’s not actually very good at pretending. she knows the school nights ep like the back of her hand because she believes in entire discography supremacy. likes the vocal differences between then and now, likes to be able to listen to someone’s growth. learned the term comphet in a good luck, babe! tiktok comment section. will wear merch shirts to the pizzeria and listen to hot to go! loud enough that the sound bleeds out of her headphones for anyone who passes to hear. she’ll do the dance while she microwaves that pizza for breakfast the next morning. calls it her ymca. will scream-sing good luck, babe! will jump on her bed and put on a messy lil concert of that one, too. says it tickles her soul like a past life lover. and if you dig around in her closet you’ll find a purple rhinestoned cowgirl hat.

maya likes her lyrics, thinks they’re smart and witty. the songs she can feel the best via bass and vibration when played real loud are super graphic ultra modern girl, femininomenon, and naked in manhattan.

natasha likes most music. and most things. her background (red room, espionage, superheroing) calls for adaptability. assimilation. she learned a long time ago to take everything in stride. there are things she likes more than others, of course, but most things are generally fine for her. she’ll make it all work. in that same vein it’s kind of hard for music to be really special to her. she mostly hears chappell when kate throws parties. she and yelena are similar in that dancing probably won’t happen unless someone else drags her into it.

wanda likes some of her slower songs. picture you, kaleidoscope, coffee, casual. likes when they come on shuffle. will queue them up to listen to while she reads, cooks, or gardens. 

yelena won’t listen to chappell on her own. won’t listen to much of anything on her own if it isn’t something she used to listen to with alexei when she was little. she’s one of those people who does most things without a soundtrack. most things in silence. including working out, which kate says is serial killer behavior. but she likes when kate plays chappell. she’ll nod along, tap her foot, start to smile. sometimes she’ll ask kate to play “naked in the city” even though she knows that’s not what it’s called. she just likes the little unimpressed face kate makes when she gets things wrong on purpose. yelena doesn’t really dance but every once in a while she’ll let kate pull her around the kitchen in a half-assed pantomime of it. she’ll sway to slower songs. she’ll hum along. and she'll always slow dance with kate to love me anyway.

[slushiepizza]

hi slushie (my redacted blog is cashandprizes in case this helps)! saw your post about work stuff and idk if any of this will help but just some ideas. for context i will say I'm also in school and working part time at an office job and can definitely struggle somedays to stay on task!

Category 1: skills/techniques

Organize your stuff - but not how other people tell you, in a way that works for your brain. So many people will tell you to get a planner and if regular journaling/writing doesn't work for you, this probably won't. I will say I make a google calendar for each class and put assignments and reminders in before the semester starts from the syllabus. As for work stuff, honestly I have my basic tasks that I'm always doing and the rest I get five million messages about in the work group chat. But this might not work for your brain! Maybe you're a sticky note person, or maybe you like phone reminders. Maybe you need fun notepads like this. You know your brain best.

Figure out the optimal background noise configuration to make your brain work. Some people put on music, others put on podcasts, some people listen to nature sounds, some people need complete silence (noise-canceling headphones are great for this). If you know you've been most productive in school libraries or coffee shops, find that ambience and play it. I always recommend mynoise because it really helped me during the pandemic and there's so many noise machines (nature sounds, public spaces where people "talk", ambiance, music, etc.) - I find the brain "hacking" (binural beats) are adjustable enough to keep me focused without being too anxious and can be hidden under music. But there's always youtube asmr or lofigirl or any number of other things - again, you're your own best expert

Timing. I'm a major pomodoro fan, because I find the work-break-work-break-work-long break system really helpful for not just keeping me on task but reminding me to get up and stretch. pomfocus allows you to modify the timers and I like it a lot, but you can also use a phone timer. what's useful for me is knowing that there's a set time limit - all things end, and I can keep trying and being unsuccessful but at least i did it for that whole time. idk, works for me, maybe it will work for you. or not, that's okay too!

Reward system. the rewards might be the most important part (might just be me). sometimes motivation is getting to the reward, sometimes it's being done, and if it's getting to the reward you gotta have a fun reward. I have set things to be my rewards that I enjoy (playing five minutes of a phone game, watching a video, scrolling down tumblr) like I made a playlist of shorts and short videos on youtube to watch during breaks. That and stretching out my body helps a lot and reminds me to stay focused when I am working.

Good snacks. I had a professor in undergrad tell me "if you're going to have a meeting with yourself you need a good snack" and she was wrong about a lot of things but not that. sometimes having an easy and yummy snack food and a yummy drink makes the difference when you're working.

Figure out what distracts you and plan for it. the thing is you can't eliminate every distraction, right? but if you plan for how to handle them, that can help. so first figure out what gets you distracted (silent enough to hear your thoughts, hearing other conversations, being cold/hot, uncomfortable chair, etc.) and see if you can manage that or plan for it. for example my office is freezing in the summer and sweltering in the winter, so I dress in layers and keep a snuggie in my desk when I'm on campus because if I don't i will spend all day complaining about the temperature and not working. do i look ridiculous in the snuggie, sure, but i wasn't shivering and got my stuff done.

Category 2: support systems

accountability buddies. if you have friends or coworkers or whoever that you can be like "ok. i am going to do this. if you see me on discord/tumblr please fist fight me" that is so helpful. sometimes when I'm working remotely I will sit in discord vcs to parallel play because I know it keeps me accountable for doing my work. if you can find or make something like that happen, it might help you stay on task or keep you motivated?

friends/supports in general. sometimes it's really nice to just talk about how you're struggling. they can't always fix it, but it can be nice to just be heard and validated. also, if you have coworkers, they might have had similar experiences or you might all be struggling, which could be an indicator that you are not The Drama

talking with supervisors/advisors/etc. definitely daunting, but sometimes talking to supervisors can be helpful - or it can suck. try to figure out their vibes and ask other coworkers first. you might also be able to get resources from your advisor, trusted professors, campus resources, etc. that are worth investigating.

i'll keep it short, but i always feel obligated to ask if you've considered therapy - it's because i'm in therapy school and this is my life sorry. it's not for everyone, but some people find it useful.

wow jesus sorry this was so long. i hope maybe any of this was helpful??? i am sorry you are struggling and i hope you have some good outlets to work through it and some solid friends. i hope things improve!!! wishing you the best (also i love your art not totally related but we praise your art constantly in the discord)

Hi, Lexi. Thank you so much for giving such a detailed explanation omg :")) it definitely helps a lot and it gives me peace of mind to have actionable steps like you've given me, I will try to apply them and hopefully they can help me get back on my feet again. And thank you for the kind words, and for always supporting my art; your kindness gives me the strength to keep doing what I do ^^ To everyone else, I hope these tips can be of use to you too!!

[lili-bear]

Things you can do when small that ( mostly ) do not require a cg!

For those who may not have a cg, may not want a cg, or have trouble without one/when theirs is away

Whilst many find it easier to regress whilst in the company of a carer, it is 100% not needed if it is not wanted or not available. For those who may struggle to find ways to keep themselves entertained and engaged in positive and productive, safe ways; here’s a list I’ve created!

Let yourself play!

This could be playing with toys such as blocks, rings, trucks, dolls, or simply stuffed animals! Using your imagination ( or rather, learning to undo the rule that you cannot ) is an amazing way to pass time and also allow your little self to have fun and help their brain relax in productive and educational ways.

Though, this isn’t a reality for everyone. For those who cannot focus and therefore cannot imagine, or those who have trouble imagining or doing imaginative play, toys such as: blocks, rings, small puzzles, shapes, and matching cards can be useful! Engaging your brain in educational and experimental ways rather than imaginative is just as valid and useful to entertaining your smaller self.

Take yourself out on a small date! Who says you can’t?

A lot of us who regress love to imagine a day with a carer at the zoo, aquarium, pet store, toy store, or even the park. Whilst this is a super fun and interactive way to spend the day, who says you have to with a carer? If you’re able to, feel safe enough or are old enough: it can be an amazing way to spend time with yourself !Taking yourself out for treats whether alone or with friends is just as important and beneficial as it would be with a carer. Invent your love for different things, find comfort in exploring the world around you without the fear of judgement from someone else.

It can be just as important for our smaller selves to learn independence ( if possible ) as it would be for any child. Learning to cope with being alone is so important, and one of the first steps is to positively reinforce alone time.

Find friends who regress or are tiny too!

Sometimes it can be just as comforting to spend time with another small as it is to with a carer. Playing with each-other, creating a safe space to relate and connect on a level not many may be able to understand can be so very vital to your little self. Having that sense of unity can make being small feel less isolating, which can be important for those who struggle with loneliness. Play dates, calls, secret plans and mischievous adventures are also sometimes the highlight of the day! Why not get a little best friend? Your small self needs some “ bestie time “ too!

Watch cartoons, colour, play age-appropriate video games and snuggle with stuffed animals

Ahhh the usual. These are pretty universal things that anyone can do when regressed! Many of them are also very ‘hide-able’ for those who may not have very accepting housemates and family members around them. Relishing in childhood classic movies and cartoon series, colouring messily with crayons, playing that childhood favourite video game and snuggling are all things that ( at least personally ) fill my little self with great joy and happiness. Why not have a chill day at home? What sounds better than that?

Have a dance party

This one sounds a little silly, but if you are able to I believe it’s a fantastic way to get out energy whilst also having fun. Even just swaying when sitting down helps! Self-stimulating and a form of relaxing relief brings our smaller a sense of fun and joy. Get those headphones, turn on a childhood favourite jam and absolutely go dance-crazy! You can even turn on special lights, jump around or make a whole routine! Rolling around in bed, using the objects around you as a microphone, pretending to be royalty or even a pop star is a great use of imagination and energy in unique ways. If big you can have dance parties, so can little you!

[hajimeiwaswife]

AUGUST | CHAPTER 7: SAD BEAUTIFUL TRAGIC

[Masterlist]

Chapter 6 Chapter 8

Summary: You’re marrying Izuku Midoriya in September, but he gets an emergency call from All Might’s old agency in the U.S., requesting his services for the entirety of August. A death threat directed at you for being his partner has his hair on edge. However, the always responsible, caring and heroic Shoto Todoroki comes to your rescue, offering to take care of you for the whole month. Who would have thought that 31 days were enough to make you reconsider your engagement with the number 1 hero and fall in love with the Icy Hot man who held your hand during the last breeze of summer?

Warnings: Everyone is 25 more or less, death threats. MDNI.

Wc: 3,4 K

Playlist

It was a warm morning. The birds were singing in the calmness of the dead city, just prior to the usual motion of cars and people that headed to their respective workplaces or schools. The sun felt like a cosy caress to the cheek, the sunbeam mixed with the morning summer breeze created an aura so different from the excruciating sweltering weather that accompanied the endless days of August.

With a cup of iced coffee placed in the small wooden table of the balcony I enjoyed the first hours of the day, tapping on my computer and trying to keep up to date with the delayed work. I had even indulged myself in a white silk gown, feeling like an elf in a forest, and being helped by the music in my headphones that acted as a soundtrack to my fantasy life.

Shoto had recommended me to start working on the balcony during mornings for that same reason: the feeling of belonging to another world. Although he didn’t describe it like that, it was more like ‘the weather is nice’. But those are big words coming from Todoroki’s mouth, so I liked to think that was what he meant. He also added ‘come back inside at noon, it’s hot then.’

Everything was so quiet, so serene, it almost felt like a sin to savour such a delicate moment without sharing it with a loved one. Shoto had left, apparently there was a small case he needed to attend, and as I was safe in his apartment, he ―reluctantly― opted to give me the morning for myself. He would be back by lunch, or so he said.

The work on the screen kept my mind occupied, even if every so often I got distracted by the nice atmosphere. I had translated a couple of documents, but I still had quite a few to submit. I kept tapping, looking through different dictionaries and, from time to time, activating my quirk to go faster. What a blessing.

It wasn’t until the sun was too high in the sky and the summer breeze too heavy on my skin that I decided to head back to the dining room table. I washed the cup I had used from breakfast and then sat in front of my computer again. The document had me absorb, until something caught my attention from the corner of my eye: there was something in the chair next to mine.

Curiosity was never one of my weaknesses, but it didn’t mean I wanted to know less than the information I was given, so I looked. A fond smile appeared on my face when I saw the denim jacket Shoto used the night before to go for some extra rice for dinner; it even smelled like him, too.

Shoto smelled like comfort. That was the best description I could give. It was minty, refreshing, but also ash-like, the same way a fire at a chimney would aromatize the house. So characteristic, yet so odd; so foreign, yet so familiar. He had opened in such a short time a tiny space in my life and heart, and I would forever be grateful for the effort he was putting on protecting me without asking for anything in exchange.

Nearly a half an hour later I heard the sound of keys opening the front door. The rusty dragging of shoes who are being taken off and the shuffling that followed lead the host to the kitchen without a single glance towards my direction, serving himself a glass of water and sighing in between as if he hadn’t drunk water in a year. I noticed the wrinkles in his hero suit, as well as some of the fabric that came unstitched, showing his beaten skin. His hair was a mess, red and white jointed in the middle, the same way it would as if a separation between both had never existed.

My eyes continued to roam, fixing on his arms, especially on the one holding the glass, flexing beautifully and showing his prominent muscles every time he lifted it to his red and plump lips, swallowing and provoking his Adam’s apple to move up and down that svelte neck―

“Hello.” The deep voice of the pro-hero startled me out of my own spell, sight falling on his neutral face, quickly checking his lower back resting slightly against the countertop to return to his mismatched eyes.

“Hi.” I answered with the little voice I could find, I felt mortified, but Todoroki was acting as if I had not been, in fact, devouring him with my eyes just a few seconds ago. ‘For Lord’s sake, Y/n, you’re getting married in less than a month.’ “How was your morning?”

“Busy,” Shoto moved away from his previous position, grabbed another glass from the upper cupboard and came straight to the table I was at, placing both glasses on it. That was my call to start moving to set the table as well as the food, which only needed to be heated in the microwave, “we had a case.”

“Yeah, you told me so this morning,” I nodded, placing two napkins and two pairs of chopsticks on the table, “What was it about?” I put the tupper inside the microwave, waiting by the countertop for it to finish.

“Nothing serious, they could have handled it without me.” He sounded frustrated, I could pick that up from his irritated tone, “I don’t think I was necessary at all.”

“Why?” I furrowed my brows, confused. Shoto walked around the table and sat on his respective place, passing a hand down his face and looking up again.

The continuous beeping of the electronic device brought my attention to the food, which I poured in two different plates. Once I looked in front of me to get to the table I noticed it, him, looking right through me.

Shoto’s eyes held an intensity that I had not seen since the night I had to leave my apartment; and yet, the feelings behind them were definitely not the same. I couldn’t interpret it for the love of everything that was holy, but I knew I had probably stared at him the same way just a few minutes before. How intriguing to see two eyes so different hold the same gaze, so beautifully wild.

He observed me coming closer and didn’t tear his eyes away not even when I had already sat down at the table, both our plates in front of us. For the first time, I felt nervous around him; not in a bad way, though his stare was giving me goosebumps. I needed to distract him from me, or me from him, whatever came first. “Why?” I repeated, waiting patiently for his answer, even if my mind I was short-circuiting.

Just the same as me, his face looked surprised, as if awaken from a dream in plain daylight. His eyes opened wide for less than what a sigh lasts, and then, his neutral façade came back. “Why what?” he asked innocently, such a contrast to his previous behaviour.

“Why didn’t they need you?”

“Oh,” he nodded, swallowing and taking a sip of water before speaking again, coughing a little, “The villain wasn’t that much of a threat, the sidekicks could have taken care of it.” He shrugged his shoulders and started eating.

“Maybe they wanted you to work on something else that isn’t as boring as this.” I joked signalling me and his house, to which he lifted a brow in return.

“You’re not boring.” He simply said and, before I could try to explain my take, he continued talking, “This case is way more important than a fake prophet.”

“What? A prophet?”

“Yes.” Shoto passed his hand down his face once again and sighed before pinching the bridge of his nose, “He was talking about the new era of villains and the blood of the revolution and shit like that. He was a lunatic, but not difficult to catch. They really didn’t need me on this one.”

“Oh, wow! The new era of villains? What the hell?” I asked, placing down my glass of water and feeling a chill ran down my spine.

“He was a mad man, Y/n, don’t listen to that.” The pro-hero continued eating.

I would have left it there, not really knowing what else to say to him even if I wanted more details, but the nonstop shifting in his legs told me something wasn’t right. Shoto was a very still person, never moved more than what was necessary at the table, so seeing him so active while having lunch was no less than suspicious.

“Shoto, are you okay?” I asked, what gained me the heterochromatic eyes falling on my worried façade. No words were exchanged, he just gifted me a nod of the head and kept on munching on his food. “Is there any reason why you still have your hero suit on?”

With that, he suddenly stopped, looked down at him as if surprised that I, indeed, was right about his attire, and looked back up. He shook his head, cheeks puffed like those of a squirrel and painted in a soft pink. As adorable as he looked, it worried me his strange behaviour; so laid back, messy.

The small drop of sweat that was falling from his forehead to his temple alerted me that something else was going on at the moment. But what? What could make the number three hero so nervous? He continued munching until he swallowed all the food on his mouth, and then, he spoke:

“Not really. It’s just― I was hungry, really hungry. I forgot.” Even if it was true, the slight stutter gave away his real state; definitely he was hiding something.

“Shoto, has something else happened at work?”

“No!” he exclaimed, eyes wide and shaking his head, “Not at all, just that. They could have taken care of it without me, really.”

“You’ve already said that.” I furrowed my brows, looking at him, scrutinizingly. “Will you tell me, please? You look nervous and―”

“Izuku told me to tell you that he wanted you to call him.” He interrupted me. It took me by surprise, not really processing what he had just said. Izuku? When did he say that?

“Huh?” I blinked once, twice, mouth opened and brain not functioning.

“He called you the other day, you had left your phone in the living room. We talked and he asked me to tell you that, but I forgot. I’m sorry.” He rumbled rapidly, and if I hadn’t understood what he had just said, I would have definitely believe he talked in another language, maybe simlish.

But now that I thought about it, it was true I hadn’t talked to my fiancée in a couple of days. Everything going on with moving to Shoto’s apartment, working from home, not being able to talk much to my friends… Oh, how I missed being in the presence of my girls. And Izuku had probably been so busy that the poor man didn’t have time to call, either.

“Oh,” was the only thing I could say, flabbergasted. “I will, thank you.”

Shoto just nodded. Before I could regain the thread of the previous conversation, Shoto took his plate and glass, put them in the dishwasher and left the room without a single word. ‘What the hell have just happened?’ I thought, shaking my head and trying to find an explanation to his behaviour. That morning, when he left, he was fine. What happened at work?

The sun had already gone to sleep, leaving a big space in the sky for the moon to make its appearance. Shoto hadn’t talked to me the rest of the afternoon, not even at evening, because he decided to have dinner by his own in his bedroom. I couldn’t understand his reasoning, I didn’t remember anything that could have hurt his feelings or offended him.

What I did do was call Izuku. It had been a rather awkward conversation; he sounded so tired and I was too trapped in my mind to pay attention to the details about his case he was telling me about. I blamed the translations of that day, activating my quirk for such a long period of time affected me too much. Nonetheless, hearing his voice made me feel a little better.

It was a pretty warm evening, August was being hell if I had to be honest, so I decided to go out to the small balcony on Shoto’s living room. I brought a bottle of wine, a wineglass and my phone to listen to some music while I observed the busy life of the city.

The cars almost shut down the sound of the wine pouring into the glass, and by the almighty noise of the horns, it looked like someone decided to run a red traffic light. Taylor Swift among traffic, the musical. I laughed at my own lame joke, the voice of the songwriter murmuring about a love that was there, left and then came back; sounded a lot like the Lord of the Rings if you thought about it: there and back again, a journey where you are in one place, leave, and you come back. Maybe she should just write the soundtrack for the next movies and―

“Hey.” Shoto’s deep voice interrupted my train of thought and startled me to the point of my wine deciding to colour my pyjamas with a maroon tone. “Oh, uh, forgive me. I’ll go get some napkins―”

“It’s fine.” I replied, looking back at the entrance of the balcony and smiling slightly towards him. “I needed to, eh, refresh.”

“I see.” He said, nodding his head, confusion cleared in his eyes. He stood at the doorway, looking at the ground and, after a small clearing of the throat, he asked: “What are you doing outside?”

It was cute, the way he tried to make small talk even if he was unable to hold it, even after spending half the day without directing a single glance towards my way. “It’s a good evening, you know? I wanted to enjoy the weather.”

“Right.” Shoto nodded again, swallowing hard and, for the first time in that brief interaction, looking at me. “Do you mind if I join?”

“Not at all.”

With indecisive steps, he approached the chair next to mine and sat down, placing his hands on his knees and observing the same traffic I had been admiring for the last ten minutes. There was silence, just the ambient sound and Taylor’s voice filling it and waving around the two of us. At least, until I decided to break it.

“Are you going to tell me what happened at work?”

My question took him by surprise, as his eyes widened and his breathing shrank to the point of non-existence. I could appreciate a drop of sweat coming down his temple as his hands started to tremble.

“Shoto?” I asked again, brows furrowed and chest constricting at his obvious distress.

“I didn’t want to tell you.” He whispered, swallowing hard one more time, his Adam’s apple moving up and down.

“What is it? Is it about me?”

Shoto nodded his head and sighed, closing his eyes, he seemed to be trying to calm himself. It was strange to see Shoto losing his cool, he had been behaving strangely all day and I was quite worried about him. Knowing that I had something to do with it made my heart skip a beat. That's why I didn't want any of Izuku's friends to get involved in the case.

“We found some letters back at your apartment.”

My blood ran cold. Well, that was definitely something I had not expected to hear that night. My mouth was dry, my throat held a knot and my stomach was warning the floor of the balcony of an impeding change of decoration.

“… And?” I asked with little voice.

“I’m not going to tell you what they say, if that’s what you wanted to know.” He answered sternly. “But they were, um, they were written with blood.”

“Cow’s?” I questioned.

“No.” Shoto looked up at the sky and passed a hand down his hair, messing it all up more. “No, L/n, it was Jim Bubaigawara’s blood.”

“I― What― Who?”

“He was a member of the League of Villains, maybe you know him by the name of Twice.” My brows lifted at the information; I was too curious to realize how scared I really was.

“But, wasn’t Twice dead? Like, Hawks killed him, right? Ten years ago, isn’t it?” I started rumbling, more to centre myself than to get answers from Shoto. “How is it written with his blood? How do you get blood from someone who is dead? Who has been dead for ten years, to say the least. Unless he isn’t dead. Is he? Is Twice alive? Shoto, please―”

“Y/n.” that tone again, so stern, so manly and deep, it made me close my mouth immediately. “Twice is dead, we know that for sure.” I breathed again, but my relief lasted less than a sigh. “Last time someone got blood from Twice it was my brother’s doing, but we asked him and he knows nothing about this. I mean, he has no contact with the surviving League’s members.”

Would I dare to ask? The warm evening suddenly took a turn to a snowy morning of winter, it all felt so cold and misty and dead. August disappeared so December could strike in the middle of Summer, and I was the only one living the freezing wind coming from the clouds only I could see.

“We don’t know who is doing this, but they are getting bolder. They are leaving clues without wanting to, this was obviously a mistake from their part.” Shoto turned his whole body and, surprisingly, leaned towards me and pressed both his hands on my shoulders. His eyes were so serious and determined that I couldn’t take my gaze away from them, too absorbed by the way he was looking at me. I could feel his breathe on my lips, it was bizarre, cold and hot at the same time. “We’ll get them, they’ll go to prison and you’ll be safe and sound. You are safe with me, okay?” I nodded and he nodded back, sighing through his nostrils. “I didn’t want to tell you because it was too much to take in, but you’re a brave woman, and intelligent, and I underestimate you every single time in case the information we get breaks you. I know it’s scary, but I assure you whoever is making you feel so small is going to pay for it.”

I was speechless. Shoto's heterochromatic eyes stared directly into mine with the same intensity as they had earlier in the day when he looked at me at lunch time. I could feel the blood rising to my cheeks, so warm it could compete with the predictions for the next day’s temperature. My heart was beating a mile a minute, I wasn't sure if it was from fear or from Shoto's sudden closeness.

“I trust you.” I whispered, my breathe fading into his lips, which were opened due to his rapid breathing.

“Thank you.” He said.

We stood like that, in that same position, for a few minutes. Maybe we just needed some reassurance, or some human warmth, but either way, I was comfortable. Shoto’s presence was unique, so intimidating, imposing and dangerous, but also so delicate, calm and sweet. I smiled at him with a saddened expression; I was still scare. However, I knew Shoto would protect me, he had been doing so for almost two weeks and had proved his well-known ability.

The music was still playing in the background, it was almost like an omen, something none of us understood yet, though we had started to feel without realizing it was happening.

“What song is that?” Shoto murmured, smiling back at me.

“Sad Beautiful Tragic.” I answered.

“What is it about?” One of Shoto’s hands went up my shoulder, to my neck, and landed gently with a caress on my left cheek.

“Jake Gyllenhaal.”

“I hate that guy.” I let out a small laugh and wrapped myself in the coolness of his right hand.

“Who doesn’t?” It was his turn to laugh, a high pitch sound that was so melodic and funny at the same time. And that was how our night ended, with a song too sad and too romantic to be about us, or so we thought, because his hand never left my cheek and my breath never stopped caressing his velvety lips, listening to a fate so distant and so abstract that we forgot that there were 20 days left until August ended.

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