#it begets my opinion too

[starredforlife]

a message, hi, hello, to the predominantly white estadounidense community on tumblr: I hope it depresses you to be American. I hope you are realizing how much blood we have on our hands. Decades and generations of it. I don’t want it to make you hopeless and helpless and victimized I want it to make you ashamed and devastated and motivated to do something. Your tax money pays for weapons that kill children overseas and if you got a minimum wage job here you couldn’t afford to live between paychecks. What a shit fucking country. Are we supposed to accept this? Is this how you want to live in ten or twenty or thirty years from now? Do you want to continue to shoulder the responsibility of our great acts of “justice” and “mercy” and “intervention” on the countless souls who don’t even live in our borders? What can your own soul live with? Don’t we owe it to humanity to at least feel the gulf of guilt we’ve made for ourselves?

[leportraitducadavre]

My interpretation of Itachi's character is fairly contrasting with yours. I pose my arguments against your analysis. I hope I would get a lead unto having an unbiased opinion.

Itachi's position in here between was a rock and a hard place. Having witnessed horrors of wars he chose to the stop war. It wasn't the best decision but even still he accomplished many things.

A new Forth Great Ninja war was prevented. Uchihas plan wasn't to reform the government it was to take control of them. Their desires were clearly reflected in their demands. While half of them was about freedom, the rest was only to control village. This, along with Obito's plan for revenge and war, will definitely start a war.

Madara, with the pact, was foiled for more than seven years long enough for the strong Shinobis like Naruto and Sasuke to grow up and defeat him.

Sasuke's life was saved. Itachi would go at all lengths to protect his brother. Afterall, its only obvious he would be over-protective of Sasuke since both loved each other a lot(as siblings).

The Uchiha's reputation were saved. Imagine what would have happened to the Uchihas after the war. The people were already suspicious of the Uchihas and now we will have never ending persecution and would be branded as traitors, doesn't matter if the coup won or lost. The coup wasn't about reforming anyway.

People in the village got to be safe too.

And despite all these he still regretted a lot enough that he wanted the person he adored the most to kill him. Also, no one here is trying to justify his action. A justification and a reason has a clear distinction. Just because there was a reason it doesn't make the acts were justified. He himself acknowledged that. The writer didn't try to justify nor did Itachi himself. People like, Hashirama and Naruto, appreciated the role he played and praised him as a Shinobi.(being seen as a villan while protecting the people isn't easy, btw). They weren't justifying or glorifying his actions in any instance.

He wasn't an absolute nationalist. He he was an idealist. His motivations most cases(especially while making big decisions)were to 'not beget war' and 'maintain peace'. Doesn't matter if Uchihas managed to control the village it still starts war, death, destruction and countless losses which is exactly what Itachi hated from when he was 4. He also wanted to reform the village by becoming a Hokage. He wanted to wiped out the entire ninja system since ninjas were the ones who were used as a weapon for the Diamoyo start constant wars. The Leaf was sort of obnoxious in the time of Tobirama and Hiruzen's regime. But even still, the Hokages were good and passionate and also the people were innocent.

A new Forth Great Ninja war was prevented. Uchihas plan wasn't to reform the government it was to take control of them. Their desires were clearly reflected in their demands. While half of them was about freedom, the rest was only to control village. This, along with Obito's plan for revenge and war, will definitely start a war.

How do you even know it was prevented? Shisui stating that hidden villages will take advantage of Konoha’s civil war to invade was just a fear that was actually constantly proven wrong throughout the series; when Suna invaded and Konoha was destroyed (forcing it to send their most powerful shinobi out of the village to collect money) no other village took advantage of the situation, not even Kumo or Iwa, two of the big five that were not struggling politically or militarily as Suna, Kiri and Konoha were. Kumogakure even tried to kidnap Hinata while in the middle of signing a peace treaty, yet they did nothing against the Hyüga clan nor the village during one of their most vulnerable state.

Furthermore, you mean to tell me that a civil war (I am using that notion generously because Konoha is a military state with a non-civilian population, specifically trained for combat) destabilizes the military and economic power of a city, yet the complete disappearance overnight of one of the village's founding and most powerful clans does nothing to its structure? Other villages wouldn’t see the absence of Sharingan-wielders as an enticing opportunity to strike? Do you mean to tell me that a village was left without police to control it overnight (and their job is considered super important by detractors), yet the city did not succumb to chaos?

Their desires were clearly reflected in their demands.

What were their demands? Enlighten me.

While half of them was about freedom, the rest was only to control village.

Where do you get this information from? There’s nothing of the sort stated in the manga.

This, along with Obito's plan for revenge and war, will definitely start a war.

Obito’s plan needed the annihilation of the Sharingan-wielders as he didn’t want anyone capable of obtaining the Mangekyou to jeopardize his plan to control the ten-tails, Itachi killing the Uchiha literally allowed Obito to start the war!! 

Madara, with the pact, was foiled for more than seven years long enough for the strong Shinobis like Naruto and Sasuke to grow up and defeat him.

… what? This doesn’t make any sense and has nothing to do with Itachi… you mean to tell me that Itachi killing his clan made Sasuke as powerful as he is? Because Sasuke has always been powerful and has always been Indra’s transmigrant, and as I’ve said, Obito wouldn’t have been able to initiate the war (or at least would’ve been incredibly difficult for him) with the Uchiha clan still alive!

Sasuke's life was saved. Itachi would go at all lengths to protect his brother. Afterall, its only obvious he would be over-protective of Sasuke since both loved each other a lot(as siblings).

An eight-year-old was tortured mentally by his brother through Tsukuyomi by watching his clan and parents get killed over and over again, was left to live alone in a compound destroyed by his brother’s actions, having to clean his parents’ own blood and fend for himself –but at least he’s alive… the circumstances and solitude in which he grew is abysmal, traumatic, negligent and inhumane, but we don’t care as much about children’s safety as we do children being just alive.

There were other children in that compound, children that knew nothing of and participated not in the coup to which Itachi didn’t extend the same kindness he did his brother.

The Uchiha's reputation were saved. Imagine what would have happened to the Uchihas after the war. The people were already suspicious of the Uchihas and now we will have never ending persecution and would be branded as traitors, doesn't matter if the coup won or lost. The coup wasn't about reforming anyway.

What “reputation”? The Uchiha were always constructed under a negative light within Tobirama’s system, you lot keep saying they were saved from being seen as detractors when there’s not a single panel that states they were planning to change the system as a whole (rather take down the current government, which is not the same).

Furthermore, to think that they cared about the rest of the population's mindset regarding them is so incredibly simplistic I have to laugh at it –they’re the strongest clan in the village, without Uchiha, there’d have been no village in the first place, and they were already aware of the unfavorable perspective in which they were regarded by others, nothing in itself would’ve changed.

The Uchiha being seen as loyal to the village helped no one but the current system as it is, as they’re seen as a government without opposition, it wasn’t about maintaining the Uchiha’s honor, but keeping the fragile credit of the structure and those in power -if Uchiha died in their own terms, then other clans will know about the clan’s discomfort with the current mindset, and those that feel uncomfortable with it might find a group that validates such sentiments:

Kakashi admits to being uncomfortable with the way he's viewed by the system, he even uses plural when referring to ninja ("we ninja") -meaning there's a communal uneasiness with the whole situation.

The fact that the government silenced detractors (Uchiha) by killing them will only deepen further the general shinobi population's discomfort, which is why is imperative to silence the truth.

[On another note, why do you keep using "honor" as an excuse to execute an entire compound of people? The entire clan was decimated and the whole "honor" of the family rested as another responsibility Sasuke had to endure all by himself thanks to "Itachi's love" -they were left with no honor as Sasuke was forced to restore it! Furthermore, they're all dead! What is "honor" gonna do for them? For the massacred innocents at least? They did nothing wrong and were killed regardless, their honorable nature wasn't even being questioned!]

People in the village got to be safe too.

Safe of what? When was it stated they were going to fight against those who weren’t in power? The problem is they rebelling against those they deem their oppressors but not the government refusing to renounce their power in order to keep the “population they hold so dear” safe? They are both willing to kill innocents (so I guess some people in the village weren’t safe, but in your book, they don’t matter as much), and use the rest of the military population to strike against Uchiha (which is also, never actually stated!). The idea of a “within war” was never confirmed as the Uchiha had no chance to strike, no one is to say they weren’t trying to take power through force yet quietly, no one is to know what was their actual plan as that was never brought to light!

The Uchiha are wrong for wanting to take the power but the government isn't wrong for wanting to keep it, the Uchiha are wrong for their methods to seek authority but not the government for defending the status quo. Uchiha having power would mean annihilation, somehow, despite them being against just their oppressors, not Konoha as a whole; while the government seeks to protect the village despite massacring an entire and most important portion of their militia and one of the founders' clans.

And despite all these he still regretted a lot enough that he wanted the person he adored the most to kill him. 

He regretted nothing, he wanted Sasuke to kill him in order to both give him an objective and to distract him from finding out Konoha’s involvement in the Uchiha Massacre, shouldering the entire responsibility of their demisse.

Also, no one here is trying to justify his action. 

But you are, you wrote point after point why he had to kill his clan.

A justification and a reason has a clear distinction.

What distinction? You need to expand on the notions you think are relevant to you own argument. 

Just because there was a reason it doesn't make the acts were justified. He himself acknowledged that. The writer didn't try to justify nor did Itachi himself. People like, Hashirama and Naruto, appreciated the role he played and praised him as a Shinobi.(being seen as a villan while protecting the people isn't easy, btw). They weren't justifying or glorifying his actions in any instance.

What are you even writing? I’m being honest with that question, claiming to have a reason to kill his clan is used as a justification for his actions! I can’t believe I have to explain that to you. He never said he had no justification (their coup was treated as such over and over, everyone took advantage of them wanting to coup in order to both order the massacre and carry it out!!).

How on earth can you write “People like Hashirama and Naruto appreciated the role he played and praised him as a shinobi but they never justified him”, so are they praising him or not? Them positively reinforcing Itachi and praising him for “his sacrifice” (you see, not only he is perceived as a villain, he is a villain, he killed an entire kin -again, innocents included, in order to maintain specific people in power) is justifying his actions under the notion of the “greater good for the village”. 

He wasn't an absolute nationalist.

He did everything for Konoha! He even claimed himself to be “Itachi of the Leaf!” What are you even talking about?

He he was an idealist. His motivations most cases(especially while making big decisions)were to 'not beget war' and 'maintain peace'. 

Yet his actions concluded in Obito being able to control the Ten Tails with almost no real opposition as the only other Sharingan-wielder was Sasuke.

Doesn't matter if Uchihas managed to control the village it still starts war, death, destruction and countless losses which is exactly what Itachi hated from when he was 4. 

How do you know? Do you have an entirely new manga written by Kishimoto about what would’ve happened had the Uchiha taken over the village? Itachi hated Uchiha since he was four because they brought “war, death and destruction” but not Konoha that actually provoked such wars, deaths, and destruction, what an intelligent boy! 

You have to be a troll because, man, “unbiased opinion” my ass. Also, did you just come to my blog with arguments coming from Itachi Shinden? The story not written by Kishimoto?

He also wanted to reform the village by becoming a Hokage. He wanted to wiped out the entire ninja system since ninjas were the ones who were used as a weapon for the Diamoyo start constant wars. 

Funny, under Hiruzen’s regime he would’ve never become Hokage, furthermore, when did he even hinted to want to become Hokage?? Never in the entire manga. Also, the Daimyo did little to nothing when it came to wars, those were all the Kage’s responsibilities! Dear Lord, did you at least read Team 10’s Arc? Asuma’s background literally explains how the Shugonin Jūnishi fought each other because six of them wanted the entire military power of the Land of Fire to be managed by the Daimyo alone while the rest, Asuma included, defended the Hokage’s existence. 

The Leaf was sort of obnoxious in the time of Tobirama and Hiruzen's regime. But even still, the Hokages were good and passionate and also the people were innocent.

Which people were innocent? The children and non-Sharingan wielders that knew nothing of the coup and were massacred regardless? How can you write “the Hokages were good” while they literally ordered the mass killing of people they swore to protect? How can you use “obnoxious” and “good” to describe the same two people?!

Gosh, the fact that you lot (Itachi stans) don’t comprehend that his involvement in the massacre of his own people alongside the protagonist’s endorsement of state-sanctioned genocide, makes the annihilation of an entire portion of a village a plausible option to handle internal disagreements is disastrous.

Committing genocide against the village’s own people sets a dangerous precedent where future governments can see and use such slaughter as a conceivable, even necessary, tool at their disposal whenever they feel threatened, making any clan vulnerable to the decisions of its government and guaranteeing the silence of possible detractors or even the censorship of constructive criticism of the political, military, economic and cultural system.

Jesus.

[inaconstantstateofchange]

BG3 Fic Rec: A Halsin & Minthara Character Study

For anyone who might be interested in an exceedingly thoughtful work that explores both Minthara and Halsin as the complex and wonderful characters they are, and how they might slowly, begrudgingly come to an understanding with one another, I cannot recommended @tavtime's Something Wicked This Way Comes highly enough.

The prose is beautiful and artful both, with some of the lines still stuck in my mind weeks on. The story is written entirely in Halsin's perspective, and, in my opinion, the author has captured the essence of him in a truly masterful way. His level of consideration, his thoughtfulness, the way he thinks through his actions and his intentions over leaping to a response. The rhythm of him is just perfect.

Minthara too is treated with all due complexity, as well as a surfeit of care and consideration for the things that drive her, how she connects to others, and what her story might look like as she progresses throughout canon and beyond. This work was a big part of what really made me appreciate these two as characters together, rather than as fundamentally opposed beings who might never find a common ground between them.

Summary:

There was a particular turn of phrase that came to him, considering her. He would wake with it on the tip of his tongue, although he dared not utter it in her presence. To speak it aloud would have been to acknowledge the silence between them, and what had beget it. But he thought it. Alone in the night with the hum of her, her cyclone-eye stilled fury and the ring of her blade in the dark, he thought it: Bad blood. ------ Halsin doesn't like Minthara. But he thinks maybe he understands her, which is arguably worse. (Character study for Halsin & Minthara's odd, combative relationship and the ways in which they are far more alike than different. To the constant annoyance of them both.)

[alexbrunn]

Stage four

God, how I cry every time I think about the fact that they could actually be okay.

Maybe it's a bit unrealistic and full healing can only be talked about after decades of living together without stress and adversity, but I sincerely wish it. I want Pav to have his new family where he can feel happy and comfortable, he really deserves it after going through a real hell. Still, my personal opinion is that he is a victim of circumstances. He cannot be justified, but he has already bought all his actions with his own suffering. Violence begets violence.

What about Marcoh. He doesn't get a lot of time in the posts, because for the most part he is still the same Marcoh, but I think that being with Pav has given him a lot. When he strikes, he sinks back into the guilt of inflicting violence on the innocent. The communication and apology will give Marcoh the opportunity to first, in a sense, atone for what he has done, and Pav's worldviews will help him find his own way of expressing his own boundaries, that in some moments you have to choose yourself rather than endure to the last. It's much easier for him to express his emotions in general, he has a good example. And love, too.

Good luck, my two sunshine. I wish you a wonderful life!

[saintsenara]

For chose violence 12 13 14 :))

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

[choose violence ask game here]

12. who is an unpopular character you actually like, and why should more people like them?

i've answered this previously for petunia dursley, and i stand by that. but i also have another overlooked woman i adore:

merope gaunt.

merope’s son is, in my opinion, the most interesting character in the series, and his relationship with his dead mother’s memory is one of the most fascinating things about him (and also an aspect of his characterisation which canon dwells on only lightly - dumbledore’s view that voldemort ‘despises’ merope is never interrogated, despite the fact that harry clearly clocks the ways in which his grief about his motherlessness drives his decisions).

but i also think that merope is a fascinating character in her own right, not least for what she reveals to us about the complex threads which bind being a victim and being a perpetrator together, what she shows about how there are no perfect victims, and what she shows about how there are no irredeemable perpetrators.

because merope is a rapist. there is no need to handwave that away. [even though canon does - love potions are treated as somewhat benign in the text, the canonical tom riddle sr. gets no sympathy whatsoever within the narrative, and he is blamed by both harry and dumbledore, even if this happens in ways which make sense for their characters, for ‘abandoning’ his son.]

but she is also someone who must meaningfully lack the capacity to understand what she does as rape. the implication of canon is that she is subjected to incestuous sexual violence at her father and/or brother’s hands (morfin’s jealousy over tom sr., and the fact that he tells tom jr. that merope ‘dishonoured’ him by having a sexual relationship with another man, heavily suggests this), which the narrative once again considers vaguely amusing (the joke about the gaunts marrying their close blood relatives). she is certainly subjected to physical violence by them. she is treated as little more than an object to display her father’s locket. this is a girl (she’s nineteen when she dies) who cannot have any idea what things like consent and bodily autonomy are, and who shows through this how this lack of safety and education in one person’s life can go on to beget horror in another’s.

and, alongside this, she also provides a particularly good insight into something which is often absent from the canon narrative - the failure of the wizarding state. it is extraordinary that, when morfin and marvolo are arrested, she is just left on her own. or that the state has made no prior effort to remove her from the home of two men with reputations for violence, or to make sure that she has an education, or to notice that she lives in grinding poverty. or that she is forced to sell her father’s locket for a pittance because the wizarding state makes no effort to help heavily pregnant women who have nowhere else to go.

this - the fact that evil is often banal proceduralism, and that the greatest harm is caused by state apparatus - is something which is largely absent from the canon narrative, which tends to locate good or evil within the individual. so too is the reality of gendered violence, or how poverty affects women specifically, or how the institutions praised in the series - hogwarts chief among them - maintain a social structure which is hugely oppressive. these things go on to affect voldemort too, but they originate with merope.

[she also deserves defending on one specific charge, which sincerely makes my blood boil: the idea that she could have avoided dying in childbirth if she’d been braver. throughout the course of human history hundreds of thousands of women, who would have loved to have stayed alive for their babies, have bled to death in childbirth, because it is dangerous. they did not fail. they were unlucky.]

13. who gets the worst blorbofication?

remus lupin.

lupin is ready to execute a man in cold blood seconds after learning he’s still alive, and he doesn’t give a shit that three children will be watching. that’s undoubtedly justified, given what wormtail did, but it’s an edge that the chocolate-loving king of cardigans never seems to have.

14. what is that one thing you see in fics all the time?

pornography, i suppose…

[eorzeashan]

Minder, Minder

“Ensign, why don’t you go run a systems check– I need a minute with the agent.”

Raina turns to leave. “I’ll chisel the ice off the pilot’s seat for you,” She says, good-natured and obedient. Eight watches her form disappear up the ramp of the shuttle. She’s young, sweet, and terribly fresh: green in a way he hasn’t known since his Academy days. He’s not sure how she survived in the frigid wastes so long with such a chipper attitude.

Hunter seems to share his sentiments, judging by the slight disapproval in the fold of his arms and the impatience rooting his back foot to the ice floor. He’s at a crossroads for a decision, and Eight zeroes in on the words hanging off the thick of his lips. 

“Ardun Kothe’ll be happy,” He starts, his commander’s opinion relayed first, and Eight patiently waits for the relevant information that comes after the but. 

“But the girl…” There it was. “We agree that she needs to die, right?” Hm. Brutal as ever.

Not that he was complaining. They did agree on that. It was standard procedure; saw too much, heard too much, not useful enough to me, a liability– all judgements that usually ended with new blood buried somewhere deep underground. He knew it by experience and the intimate familiarity of being one such liability in a long age past. You’re a weakness, his mentor had said to him without an ounce of warmth in her voice, looking down on him wheezing for breath on the cutting board floor, unless you become a knife in my belt, I’ll leave you with all the rest.

She’d then extended a blue finger to the misshapen trash bags piled up along the wall, where the remains of her ex-lovers sat in neat little pieces, stinking of chemicals that stripped the hairs from one's nose.

He learned his lesson quickly.

People weren’t people to agents. They were loose ends. Trash to be discarded. Tools to be used. Mouths that talked too much, and eyes that watched too closely. It went the other way around, too.

Which was why Raina Temple could not suffer to live– yet against the voice of Nosta that lived eternally in the cracks of his soul, Eight found that he did not want to sink her body beneath the ice floes with rocks in her gutted stomach, a meal for the fish below.

“She’s not a threat,” He decided, not a retort, his words paced and even.

Hunter doesn’t look convinced. His fingers tighten on his forearm. There’s an unamused twitch in his second eyelid, and his shoulders are set square– relaxed from the outside, bordering on tense from within. Ready to act, while trying to play off that he is. More words stand to crawl from his throat, just above the bulbish shape that is a feature in his species. They called it an apple, like the fruit. Eight lingers over how much force he’d need to break the skin when biting it.

“She’s Imperial, she knows about the Starbreeze, she’s seen me, she’s seen you…” Hunter trails off, and Eight can see the metrics ticking in that wound brain. Eight wouldn’t call it nervousness, but Hunter…is cautious. Too cautious in all the ways he is not. Hunter skims just past paranoia and into the territory of bad faith; good for a classical agent, but too much fear begets no rewards– and jumping at shadows opens just as much room for mistakes as excessive trust.

“If she becomes a problem, I’ll take care of it,” Eight answers with a quirk of his brow, as if the danger she poses hardly warrants a second thought. To him, it doesn’t. She’d never last against him. No reason to send her back to Saganu in a body bag, and he suspects the Aristocra would be less than pleased if he did. 

Hunter’s eyes dance over his face, searching for the source of his confidence with pinpricks of wariness in the minute twitches of his face before he visibly relaxes, taut muscles released from their focus. Like a sigh, his readiness dissipates…but Eight is staring at the intent rolling up from his throat’s apple to his chin, resting on the bottom of his lower lip, weighed with purpose and a bit of that high that all with even a hint of power relish in before the utterance. Something animal in him rises to its hackles. It smells of the leash, the gentle tug before the pull. The freedom with which cruelty is spoken and the safety his prey finds in it. 

Eight has waited long enough.

“Just to be sure, though,

I’m putting a command in your brain. 

O n o-"

Eight lunges forward. The hut is small. The distance is laughable.

"M a"

He sees the shock bleed into Hunter’s eyes as he automatically falls backwards at his sudden advance. His back hits the wall, Eight’s hand fisting his collar.

"T o-"

He slams him against the slope of the hut. The impact rattles Hunter’s skull to an explosion of dancing stars, interrupting his verbage–it happened in the blink of an eye, and before he can so much as get another sound out, the Cipher’s moving again. A bit of spittle escapes Hunter’s mouth, mixed with blood. Too fast. Far too fast. What the hell?!

He’s not going to make it. No room to reach his blaster. Nowhere to get distance. The word, idiot! He tries again, fury welling up in his chest for being played a fool. 

Hunter blinks. Eight’s lips are on his, hotter than a molten star, softer than synth-silk.

His brain shuts off. He feels the other’s tongue slip through, wet, mixing with his saliva.

It takes him a second to register it probing the walls of his mouth, his senses overloaded with fever. He’s struggling to catch up, but he does, and a fierce hunger overtakes him as he claws at the Cipher agent’s back and pulls him closer into his space, their mouths battling for dominance, searching for just the right way to lock together as he eats him alive for more, more, more. His fingers trail down his nape as he bites his lower lip, tastes the wetness there and Eight moans into his mouth– the sound shooting straight down to his hidden pistol. Filthy like a whore.

Yeah. That’s more like it, Cipher. 

Just as he’s in the throes of kissing him senseless, the small part of his brain that has been screaming warnings at him breaks through the haze of his desire and he’s hit with remembering exactly what he’s here for.

The keyword! 

Hunter’s glazed eyes shoot open, the cold shock of recollection assaulting him like water dumped over his head. He shoves the agent away from him– did he really think he could seduce him out of a command? Cheap trick. He sneers.

…Only to find that the agent wasn’t budging.

Eight’s formerly closed eyes are wide open and staring straight at him. From here, he can see the wild glint in his eyes, light reflecting off the obsidian edge of his irises, dizzy with carnivorous desire and a gut-plunging intensity that makes Hunter think he’s been stabbed. Those dark eyes are the black rocks dotting the bay above a sea cliff, and he feels their pull keenly, the call of their void. 

It takes Hunter a moment to find out why.

A white-hot pain overtakes him. He tries to scream, but it doesn’t make a sound besides bouncing uselessly around in his throat. Iron, wet and heavy, gushes forth inside his mouth. The knee jerk reaction of pulling away from Eight sparks even more of that terrible pinch, the stretch of ruined flesh and his tongue alight with the kerosene of suffering– 

You bitch!

Eight’s cheeks are flushed now, and he can see the shy grin that extends from both sides of his face, painted with driblets of red.

He lets go after what feels like an eternity, taking one step back to admire his handiwork. Hunter falls to his knees, gagging and choking, blood leaking out of his ruined mouth. His tongue lolls, swelling with the inflicted bite mark of the other agent, flopping uselessly to the side as he tries to hurl swears at Eight but can only mush malformed invectives together that feel as mutated as his damaged digit.

His eyes spell of murder.

Eight wipes the runoff from his lips with the side of his hand, smearing it with red.

Amidst his rage, he hates himself for the arousal that emerges seeing him so bloodstained. The pool of want settles within the acid of his stomach.

He wants to kill him. He wants to kill the girl in front of him. He wants to have him choke on air for a week. He’s never wanted so badly to drag someone to a closet and lock them in there with him until they beg to do anything but know his touch. He still can’t say the word, and he wants to yell and scream for being in this position. 

Eight’s expression is orgasmic. 

“Mind your tongue,” Eight purrs with as much satisfaction as an overly-fed vine cat, “Minder Seventeen.”

—--------

Kothe confronts him about it later.

“Did you do that to Hunter?” It’s an innocent question, posed with that no-nonsense tone of a father trying to parse who took a cookie out of the jar. I’m not mad, just disappointed, says the stern set of his jaw. Eight doesn’t turn around to look at him from where he’s sitting crosslegged atop an empty weapons crate that Saber emptied. The spymaster waits for his answer.

He slurps a mouthful of instant MRE. Chews the noodles a little. “Dogs will bite if you pull the leash too many times.” He explains, in between a cascade of pasta falling from his mouth. Sluuuurp.

Ardun sighs. “I don’t understand why you boys are fighting, but I trusted Hunter with the codeword for a reason. If there’s a problem, I want you to tell me, Legate.” He says firmly, with a tired air to his stance. “We’re a team. We don’t hurt each other.”

“Already told’ya.”

Another sigh. “Because Hunter hasn’t talked to me either, I’ll let it go– but only this once." Ardun's tone is deadly serious. "I won’t tolerate dissension or hurting the other members of this cell. Time’s short and there’s too much at stake for in-fighting... I hoped you'd understand that. We’ll discuss this again another time.” Eight feels the air waft off the swish of Ardun’s cape as he exits the room, left alone with his lukewarm noodles.

Hm. He sips the broth thoughtfully. He didn’t use onomatophobia this time either. 

Out of the corner of his eyes, he spies something orange around the corner. He felt it before, staring at his lips. Eight smiles and wipes a stray bead of liquid from his mouth, smearing it across the back of his hand for his secret voyeur. 

The visitor quickly disappears. It’s fine, though.

He always comes back. 

[shelli-gator]

James for your character bingo?

I cannot understate how INSANE I am about him I WANT TO RUN IN FRONT OF HIM AT MAX SPEED AND BE TURNED TO PASTE

Free space: He was my favorite character when I was a wee Shelli. And nothing has changed. He's my comfort character but also my fucking punching bag I want to put him in a SITUATION.

Obviously I also have very strong opinions about him so it doesn't always line up with others, and that's okay! ❤️ Some takes on him I find a tad unfair, but he's a character who begets that sort of thing. It's probably what people think of him in world, too. I've laboured extensively over a backstory for him, I just need to find the time and energy to write something for it.

Anyway I would die for him. He's my favorite ❤️🥺 and thank you to everyone who asked about him, this was the first one I got!

[ome-magical-ramblings]

Good deeds, virtues don't sell.

The idea of talking about Virtues and Good deeds isn't as big or popular but it's a good enough topic that I feel deserve a post here. Mainly that the results from our livelihood deserve this aspect of action in the world...that sounded a bit weird writing it out. What I am saying is that your action in the world, your behavior with other, and a lot of the stuff you do "off the cushion" or "with normies" matter a lot when you go and do the rituals or even meditate.

The essence of all the practices is some kind of finicky adjustment and the real meat is what you do when you talk to people, when you act with people, and how this feed back into the whole equation. It doesn't matter how you talk to random people politely, what matter is how you talk, deal, and act with people close to you.

What are you doing in the world, how are the stuff manifesting in the world, is it all internal? you have to ask yourself these questions.

"The wrong person even with the right knowledge will come to no good end. But the right person even with the wrong (or incomplete) knowledge will make it work."

Some people might think of it as "oh I don't have a lot of money", it's not even about the money, if not by the money then you can help with time, with effort, with talking, with guiding, etc. It's not about always gain and loss in that sense. I think you can see it yourself, but if you don't do anything bad or anything good which is most of population they just tend to "blob" along the sea of life not sinking nor floating, most of their action are morally ambivalent or not even considered "actions" just motions. Paul Sedir in his book about how to Pray have a very good quote on this:

To make ourselves heard, our heart must speak the language of Heaven, and that language is charity; our person must become aware of his nothingness, and in this inner void infinity rushes in to fill it. Thus, belief is not enough; believing in God and not obeying Him is what only too many Christians do. I prefer those who claim not to believe yet obey the Divine Law. Praying without previously performing an act of charity can do nothing; whereas charity without faith still moves Heaven. Remember the wonderful stories of the Prodigal Son and the Good Samaritan. It isn’t faith that begets charity, it is charity that begets faith. Faith isn’t an opinion of the brain, it’s a conviction of the heart. To have faith in someone isn’t to believe that the person exists; it’s to trust them, and to trust them wholeheartedly.

Faith means love of God, as charity means love of one’s fellow beings. These two flames grow through one another and feed one another.

I hope, this doesn't remove the importance of the experiences, the rituals, the practices, and so on. One of my friend said he didn't appreciate the Quran or wasn't moved by the Quran until he worked with Jaljalutiya prayer. So again it's a very tricky situation, there's no one way to crack this egg and some people who over-emphasize the charity too soon don't realize it could be a bit too bad for the people who didn't have the experience or understand why they would do that. I am not telling you to go out right now and do charity just because you read it in the internet, but think about it and contemplate it. Just like Paul Sedir said, they're two flames(prayer and Faith) working in conjunctions, your rituals, invocation, spellwork, etc AND your behavior irl, how you deal with people and how people see you, your actions, thoughts, and words. You can't just practice 1 hour a day and do shit for the rest of the 23 hours. The WHOLE thing is your practice.

Let me end this two points, first a quote and lastly a technique. The Quote from G.O Mebes' Minor Arcana course:

An isolation for too long could harden your heart and damage the intuition. A period of self-analysis lasting too long, developing the principle of reason, could take place at the cost of sensitivity, which is also necessary. This is the first danger that the disciple encounters on the Way and that you need to avoid, instituting an adequate "modus vivendi" in your environment. Ethical Hermeticism teaches that it is preferable to take just one step forward and advance your environment - even a tenth part of that step - than to take ten steps, giving nothing to the environment. It is by giving that man receives.

The technique is either the Planetary Charity which you can read about extensively here and the other one is that aim to just do one good deed a day, to counsel a friend, to drop one cent in a charity box, to pray for the dead, or to help a friend with a problem. Again, Charitable and good deeds have a lot of ways to come about them so why not try praying to be in the position to help people ;) maybe that prayer can be answered. May the Divine Creator open the way for us to help one another as brothers and sisters.

Sincerely, From the Heart.

[the-derpy-duck]

My long ass post about Earthspark Starscream and Megatron.

I’ve already done a whole thing about Starscream but I have more thoughts, specifically about Megatron. Because he’s a character I have a lot of issues liking, I’ve only found myself liking a handful of Megatrons and ES is one of them.

*A very brief history of my issues with Megatron*

My main issue with Megatron comes down to me finding him less enjoyable/entertaining than the others around him. Like I like when he fights Optimus in TFP, but I liked the other decepticons a lot more. I really liked TFA Megatron’s face but uh—I’d rather watch an episode of Blitzwing and Lugnut fucking around. Armada Megatron is fine but I liked the other decepticons more. The Netflix series one was fine but I wanted more Skywarp because Skywarp is a funny little dude and I like the purple one.

I have no idea how I feel about G1 Megatron. When I think of him I think of him saying “my dear Skywarp”.

I don’t actively dislike this character but the other ones are just more interesting to me or I just like them more because of other conditions. I liked parts of IDW1 Megatron and I really like Beast Wars Megatron but idk if that counts or not.

*thoughts of ES!Megatron, Starscream, and Hashtag*

Earthspark Megatron interests me. I like him and I like his voice. I like watching him argue, disagree, and banter with Optimus. I like his relationship with Twitch and how protective he is of the terrains. I like how he saw prime being attacked and brutally attacked his former seeker to help Optimus. I like his friendship with Dot. I liked that he was willing to try and help Bumblebee and I liked that his advice was shit. He’s still growing and learning and I like him! I also like his general relationship with Starscream so far.

There are issues, yes, but the way it’s set up is (in my opinion) good so far. It’s foreshadowed that there paths will cross again, and with the way Starscream is makes me believe that they are going to be apart of each others arcs and general life.

There relationship is (in its current state) antagonist. Megatron is willing to use violence to recapture Starscream and Starscream does want to hurt Megatron and is fine with fighting him. He probably isn’t going to actively seek out Megatron but if the situation arose I don’t see him backing down (ex. Season 1 final). I also don’t see Hashtag as the type of person who would actively avoid Starscream, especially sense he’s the closest person that experienced what she went through (before the final episode) and I think the only person she talked about it too (I could be wrong here). She also doesn’t have the same idealistic view of Megatron that the others (mainly Twitch) seem to hold. Hashtag also seems to just…like Seekers? In one episode she was like ‘me and Skywarp are besties’ as a lie and the images that accompanied the scene show her and Skywarp hanging out in bad guy school and Hashtag is blushing in one of the images.

I think that Hashtag might seek out Starscream in the future, and that could cause a conflict.

*Megatron and SS’s (I hate the way that looks) relationship*

It’s very clear that there relationship was abusive. Episode 21 spells it out very clearly and Starscream appears to hallucinate (Megatron regains his Decepticon insignia). He’s been badly affected by Megatron and the show addresses this. Starscream doesn’t assume anyone of the terrains (or anyone else) would believe him about Megatron. He’s surprised when Hashtag believes him and is kind to him.

But also he’s a shitty person, the show doesn’t say that this justified Megatron’s abuse towards him. However I’m trying to not be a broken record here. Hashtag calls out Starscream for being a dick to his teammates and tells him that he can’t just leave them and her family behind. Her believing Starscream made him want to protect her and want to help her because she believes and is nice to him. Violence begets violence as altruism begets altruism. Generally, people don’t like to be mean to nice people because empathy or something.

But Starscream isn’t fully afraid of Megatron. He’s very willing to fight him and can stand up to him. The reason he doesn’t in the cave is because Megatron ambushed him and he didn’t have a lot of time to respond before Hashtag stoped Megatron. In the final episode, he is willing and takes active enjoyment in fighting with Megatron.

They don’t like each other. This is a long way of saying they really don’t like each other.

*More Megatron*

So Megatron, up to this point, has been characterized as gruff and defiant towards G.H.O.S.T but willing to listen to OP and compromise even if he disagrees. He doesn’t want for the Decepticons to be locked up but he doesn’t have that many options as outright defying G.H.O.S.T can’t help him or the Decepticons in the long run.

He is clearly frustrated with OP and his willingness to go along with G.H.O.S.T. He’s very pleased when Optimus goes against G.H.O.S.T, even if it’s not direct. He values Optimus, which is one of the reasons why he doesn’t just turn on G.H.O.S.T. He’s also just not a dumbass.

It’s established in the narrative that Megatron still is growing and learning to be better. It’s not the start of his redemption story (by that I mean he’s already made a change to himself and has gone to work with the good guys tm) so it’s a bit less obvious than IDW1/MTMTE.

The thing he seems to struggle with the most is using violence as a way to get what he wants/using it as a means to an end. He does restrain himself, but there are moments where he does use violence as a means to control others. It’s mainly when he attacked SS in the cave. Now I don’t think him attacking SS is wrong, especially when it’s in a vacuum, but with the added context of the past relation he had with SS and a few other moments in the show it suggests (to me) that this is a thing that he struggles with.

Megatron obviously disapproves of the treatment of the other Decepticons, but G.H.O.S.T is very clearly willing to just throw him in the Cybertrionian prison, and If I’m remembering correctly G.H.O.S.T and OP were actively trying to conceal this from Megatron because he would obviously disapprove of this treatment.

*MORE Starscream and Megatron relationship speculation*

I think in season 2 they are gonna cross paths again. Maybe they will often, maybe not, but I think they will have there arcs intersect a bit. I have no idea how they are gonna do either story without the other. I have my own thoughts on where I personally want there relationship to go that honestly isn’t relevant or very important to this.

The general vibe I got from the interactions between SS and Megatron was that they dislike and/or hate each other but not enough to potentially harm a select few around them. Megatron doesn’t try to attack SS after Hashtag intervenes and SS doesn’t attack him until the next episode.

Starscream is an obvious source of anxiety for Megatron, because he’s Starscream, and this is shared by SS but for different reasons. Megatron seems to want to leave SS alone but I don’t think that they will actually be apart, maybe not because Megatron is actively seeking him out but because they were forced into situations because of outstanding circumstances.

After episode 21 I think Megatron was more upset with the fact Ghost is being weird about not letting Megatron search for SS and also the way they treat Decpticons. Megatron is in a constant lose-lose situation, he can’t go against G.H.Ö.S.T because then they’ll just imprison him or hunt him down, but if he lets G.H.Ö.S.T continue what there doing than the Decpticons will actively be going after him, less because he left the Decpticons and more because (in there minds) he has been helping G.H.O.S.T imprison them, and this also goes against his morals. He’s not stupid so he isn’t just going to straight up go against G.H.O.S.T but he’s also not being particularly helpful.

The other Seekers also suffer under this general setting. Novastrom doesn’t really want to go after the autobots, mainly because it’s much more dangerous and they get nothing out of it. When she brings this up to Skywarp, the latter responds with “we either hunt autobots for mandroid or the autobots hunt us for G.H.O.S.T.” So they don’t really WANT to be doing this.

Everyone is unhappy and everyone is suffering, some are just in more active danger.

*a poor attempt to wrap things up*

Shit will go down in season 2 I think.

They aren’t about to try and kill each other, but I think they share this mutual dislike that can’t go unaddressed by the narrative, especially with the current trajectory of there respective arcs. G.H.O.S.T have been actively making everyone’s lives worse, and Megatron is in a constant catch 22 situation. I’m not good at concluding things sorry.

[banamine-bananime]

opinions on wash? for character bingo ^_^

I do love wash but for me he’s like, blorbo by proxy to soooo much of the fandom that i’m like aight he doesn’t need me there’s other people appreciating him way better than i would anyways. It’s also kind of that “zone of compelling mediocrity vs having nothing to add to a complete concept” thing for me. Like his character arc is arguably executed the best, at least one of the best-executed, in the show, and then any things to elaborate on have been elaborated on so well by so many awesome writers in this fandom that i’m like *thumbs up* tight story I have nothing to say. But since i don’t talk about him much i’ll take this opportunity to just list things i do love about wash:

really funny guy in both intentional dry sarcasm ways and unintentional ways through being so fucking… how to describe it… sort of a Stoic Military Man who Endures Things and represses Unnecessary feelings and denies himself pleasures when he does not need to do that. He does such weird things and he’s like so serious about it, sighing deeply and resignedly at Yet Another Time The Universe Is Testing Him, yet at the same time recognizes the absurdity in these situations but just… doesn’t take that recognition to the point of removing himself from the situation or refusing to engage and instead he just Endures but also wisecracks about it.

obviously all the epsilon stuff. Man. situationship of all time

LOVE the marathon-winning grudgeholding in a way that he’s entirely silent about it until suddenly he is very not silent about it. guy who CANNOT just fucking let it go but you’ll never realize that until it’s too late. reactive dog with growl violently trained out of them “bites out of nowhere!!!”

going along w that, yay repressed anger issues!!! sorry that’s flippant but i have so much love and sadness and anger for ~Troubled Kids~ railroaded into violent professions and places based on being branded with labels of violent/oppositional/defiant/angry/dangerous instead of being helped. “hey you’re struggling with something that’s making you so angry you can’t contain violence or feel so unsafe that the only defence you’re left with is aggression or feel that you need to make people fear you to feel a little less unrespected and powerless or so that they get a taste of it for once. instead of addressing that i think we can use it. you know how people believe you’re Bad and that you’ll never change and lots of doors are shut to you? well, this one’s wide open and it’s what you’re meant for, as a person who is good at violence and not trusting people. come here and we’ll train it into you some more.” i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: cop-dog-coded motherfucker

really really good juxtaposition of this with being the goofball rookie. i know some people get frustrated with the inconsistency between pfl-recruit-era wash in book-extras vs in the show but to me it really adds something. a guy can both be goofy and have repressed anger. that guy might play up the goofiness trying very hard not to again be railroaded into Being The Crazy Angry Dangerous Kid. he is friendly and wants friends! that guy might also internally chafe at the kind of friendship that exaggerated “i’m not a threat! i’m not a threat! i swear i’m not a threat i’m just a little goofy guy!!” presentation begets. being treated as the dumb hopeless class clown sidekick is demeaning and makes you resentful no matter how hard you’re trying to make yourself think “hey, they’re my friends, this is good, they like me, they’re joking with me so they don’t hate me, this is so much better than being disliked”. and then you’ve got this internal spiral going of fear of your own capacity for anger and resentment -> overcorrect -> more things to resent

YAYYYYYYY JUSTIFIED VILLAIN ARCS MY BELOVED. love s8 washie so much.

as with carolina, really well-executed redemption arc of growing to accept friendship and rest and forgiveness and hanging onto hope that there is something better (frands and luv for them) you can shoot for than just getting revenge. wash: life is just unending cycles of violence forever change my mind. *blues offer him forgiveness and unconditional acceptance* wash: wait. i didn’t know they could do that. brb recalibrating my entire worldview to account for the power of friendship.

i actually don’t like a lot of fandom “wash and cats” content because it often hits kind of a woobification tone i’m not interested in, BUT i love imagery of alleycats, cats with nine lives, cats that always land on their feet (even when they fall off something in the goofiest, most clumsy way possible. wash paradox of dexterity/somehow surviving against all odds and dumb clumsy accidents/bad luck real). cockroach kitty wash : )

otoh my Hot Wash Take is i think sometimes some fans swing the pendulum too far the opposite way from All-Characteristics-Erased-Except-Trauma-And-Protectiveness-And-Cats Woobie Wash. yeah he’s obviously extremely competent but he’s far from the most skilled character in rvb (not his fault the competition is insane) and he is a bit goofy. let him goof up a little i promise it’s okay he’s gonna land on his feet

[birues]

Sacrifices

Characters: Emet-Selch, WoL

Word count: 1.9 k

Summary: Twelve millennia ago, youngest member of Convocation Elidibus decided to sacrifice himself to save his people. Now, the young Oracle of Light decides to sacrifice herself to bring Minfilia back so the world can be saved. Respective Emet-Selch and Azem/WoL conversations on these sacrifices throughout time. And about the sacrifices of their own.

---

World Unsundered

Azem runs. Two legs on the ground one dart to the front followed by another. No aim. For once traveler of the Convocation has no desire nor destination. Would that she could lash out the rage. Would that she could lash out at the improbability of their mad plan. But here they are, hatching on her heart like a dead star. Dying star. Dying…

Themis. Gaia. Themis. Gaia. The tip of the spear swings between them as the Convocation argues, argues, and argues. Eventually, Themis grabs it to stab it into his own heart. Oh, that child. 

And the others. The sacrifice hasn’t been made yet. A council of boundless wisdom and they-

The mask hides, only until the tears reach her chin. Her breath struggles to get out. It won’t be long until he comes for her. The cracks are getting bigger with every argument. Both are too stubborn for their own good. He dresses up madness as duty, she still looks for a way out where all she can see is the bottomless despair engulfing even the sun. Oh, she ran away. Run away into desolation. Into the devastated land that once was a bustling port town and its surroundings. But none can escape the all-seeing eyes of great Emet-Selch. Not with their souls bonded, three of them. 

She shoots a look at the sky that threatens to break out into catastrophe once again. Alas… after everything she owes him at least that much. 

The fond smile that appears on her face begets grief. It took him even less time than she guessed it would take. 

“Here you are.” The anger fueling him has a different hue than the normal. “The world is threatening to break apart and here I am going after a convocation member who throws tantrums like a child and walks away from the meetings.”

“A child?” Ah. Bitterness. The shell splits open. “I didn’t ask you to come. I won’t apologize for leaving. You simply weren’t listening to what I had to say.”

“I tire of these arguments, Azem.” A strong grip on her shoulder and he faces her now. He’s not wearing his mask. Good. One swift move and neither is she anymore. “Do you truly think you’re the only one who cares for the boy? Is your opinion of the rest of the Convocation that low that you think we’re making this decision lightly? That I am making this decision lightly?”

The grip on her shoulder tightens. 

“Look at the sky! Look at it! The world is dying! Who are you to deny the Emissary his agency? His duty?!” 

Her hand finds his. 

“I don’t. I didn’t.” She gazes at the man who’s going to carry the shattered world on his shoulders. So does her composure shatter. “But I refuse to believe there isn’t another way. I cannot-”

Maybe it’s her despair. Maybe it’s his. But the anger ceases as he scoops his dearest friend into his arms. “We’re out of time, my dear.” 

A sob. “He’s too young.”

A sigh.”I know.”

Her words are muffled, pressed into his shoulder that she is. “Does Hythlodaeus know?” 

Novagrandt, the First Shard

Emet-Selch knows how to find the hero. Not that he has to try. Her soul, that unmistakable unique flame, has never been hard for him to follow nor feel, though dimmed that it is. 

Alas, he supposes, Even if he was diminished as the miserable souls inhibiting the broken words it wouldn’t take him long. A desolate place. Just out of sight enough that she wouldn’t stumble upon acquaintances. Just close enough that she would be there when she is needed. Across eons and countless lifetimes… To his dismay, he’s still privy to the traces she’s left in this reincarnation. Insulting. Infuriating. Heartbreaking. 

There she is, his greatest hope sitting under a tree gazing at the night sky she has earned. Lakeland night offers some cool breeze, the last tatters of what passes as summer here. 

“I must admit, I didn’t think it would be you who would storm out like a child who’s throwing a tantrum.” 

It’s after he utters the words he realizes how familiar they are. A small huff, a different voice carries the same pain. “I knew it would be you who would come to annoy me.” 

He shrugs. Oh, the sweet irony. He can say he’s only repaying her but… that would reveal too much of his cards. He’s revealed enough already. Enough that he’s earned that look a few times, the furrowed brows and eyes albeit different, same hue, piercing to his very being. No. This is not her. He needs to remember. 

This is not her.

“Someone needs to knock some sense into you. Since your comrades are busy enough with their insignificant bickering not to notice, I took the liberty.” 

“Oh great Emet-Selch, how would I ever repay you.” She laughs but it’s empty as the void. She turns to her backpack, in the pretense of searching for something—an excuse to gain seconds to gather herself no doubt. 

She settles for the grapes, which end up in his lap. Of course. 

"A villager gave them to me. Wouldn't take no for an answer."

"Somehow I doubt you would say no."

She shoves a couple to her mouth. “For grapes? Never.”

“Maybe you should’ve saved some for that poor child, though I must concede heroic sacrifices hardly work wonders for the apatite.” 

“They don’t.” A sigh. "Regardless of what I think, though, she has made her decision. Who am I to deny her agency?” A grape gets crushed between Emet-Selch’s fingers. Surely he has heard wrong. But the wretched hero continues, reflecting his own words back to him, unwarped by cracks. “Her duty?”

Ah, the crude cruelty. A blade hurts more if it is rustled after all. Not that she is aware of it, this shade. Parroting back the words. 

“Yet, you have made the attempt.”

“That I did. There should be a better course.”

“Maybe that is your problem, hero." Reproach, old and soar, tinges in his being. "Have you ever thought about that?”

“And which problem of mine do you refer to?”

“You, in your nativity, genuinely believe if someone tries hard enough there will always be a better way." Azem. Leaving. Swearing she will find a way. "But most of the time, there simply isn’t. Sometimes you have to make hard choices. You have to make sacrifices.” 

“That’s a bold claim." My my, that hit a nerve.  "That I do not know what sacrifice entails. You do not know me."

“Believe me, my dear, I know more about you than you probably know about yourself." Because he does. He did make an effort to know this particular shard who has brought low so many of their brethren. "Of course, you’re inclined to think what you sacrificed is unparalleled to any-”

“I never said that.”

“Regardless, those sacrifices which you hold so holy have taught you nothing. Absolutely nothing.”

It’s always the same. Almost the same. And for a moment it’s Azem whose hurt soul flinches. Whose head bows down in defeat. “Maybe you’re right.” A broken laugh as if it’s her who carries the burden of twelve millennia. “Maybe I’m destined to fail to save those I hold dear. Everyone has their fatal flaws.”

Emet-Selch looks away. Averting his eyes as he often did in their youth, the only manner of escape he allows himself. A sigh which he does not know how she interprets. He needs to change course before he makes a mistake.

“I for one do not understand your meaningless melancholy over this. As far as I understand, the original Minfilia was one of your closest friends.”

“She was.”

“The gunbreaker’s dilemma, I understand. He has taken care of the child for some time now. But surely your affection for real Minfilia far surpasses whatever affection you hold for a lass you have just met. One would think you would be happy to get your friend back.” 

“And what manner of existence would that be? Let’s say I’ve brought her back despite her wishes. That I sacrificed a child to bring her back. She would be disgusted with her own existence.” She grimaces in sympathy. “She would be miserable.”

But she would be alive. 

“Made peace with her loss, have you?”

“How can I?” Emet-Selch almost raises his brows, such a vehement rebuke… “It was my carelessness that led to the events of the Bloody Banquet."

“Yet it was your beloved mother who claimed her, no?” As she claimed the broken pieces of Azem’s soul. Fury lurches at his stomach. “ Hydaelyn has always excelled on cruel jokes.” 

“It was Minfilia’s choice, Emet-Selch. She offered herself in the hopes of saving the world.” She abruptly halts her words. Uncharacteristically. And he wishes he didn’t recognize the retreat, the way she tucks her words back into her throat when she realizes it will be pointless. 

“Go on, hero, speak your mind.” he spits the word as a poison. “Draw parallels between your friend’s misguided attempt on something she didn’t understand and my brethren’s noble sacrifice. To convince me that– Look! We’re not so different after all!” Go on, insult Hythlodaeus’ memory. “The sacrifice, if I may add, which is the very reason you and your miserable ilk continue to stand on this very star.” 

He expects fear, at least a tiny speckle of shame. But instead, she furrows her brows and bears her gaze on his like dual suns. Ah, there it is again. That look. Someone in the fog, without a compass, desperately trying to find their way. Azem’s crystal burns in his pocket. It would be easy, so easy to get her back, even if she’s— wrong. So very wrong.

Alas, she hasn’t earned that yet. 

“You’ve lost someone very dear to you, haven’t you?” A pause, and her face crumbles. “To your god?”

Hythlodaeus' sad smile as he walks away flashes in his mind. She had learned of it way too late. By his request. Not even having an opportunity to say goodbye. What was it that Hythlodaeus said? “In matters of sentimentality, she is even worse than you.” 

Yet here she is. With half a soul and no memory.

“How very astute of you, hero. Yes, everyone I ever loved either sacrificed themselves to Zodiark or got splintered to pieces by your mother.” Like you. “There really isn’t a third option now, is there?” 

She ponders her words as the silence stretches. Oh, an argument builds in her chest and the defiant twist of her mouth reminds him too much of Azem during the Final Days, it hurts.

Her words, however, are worse. 

“And what makes you think that the people you labor so hard to bring back would be okay with the blood you spilled for this endeavor?” 

Emet-Selch breaths in. Reins in the wrath threatening to explode.  Breaths out. And gets up to leave. That’s enough masochism for a day.  “You’re once again under the illusion that you’re truly alive.”

“If you succeed,” she calls out. He stops in his tracks before stepping into the portal. “If you succeed and a version of me ever finds herself in your paradise, know that I will not be okay with it.”

“If you ever find yourself in my paradise, I assure you, you shall not remember any of it. No matter how fiery your oaths of remembrance are, they will be washed clean by your rebirth. Such is the law of the underworld.” And as he looks at her over his shoulder, he pities her, truly. “Do not take it personally.” 

As Hades finally steps into the shadows, he pretends not to hear her final words. 

“I may not. But you, Emet-Selch, will remember.”

He does not need her to remind him of his burden. 

[vaguely-concerned]

I went on a stone age art wikiwalk. come partake in some highlights with me

Çatalhöyük. Often called 'the world's first city' and located in current day Turkey. Here's a probable reconstruction of an interior of the houses:

Seated Woman of Çatalhöyük. A figurine found in Çatalhöyük. Personal note: what the hell this art fucks so incredibly, look at that definition, those shapes!!

Venus of Dolní Věstonice, found in current day Czech Republic. It's dated to 29,000–25,000 BCE (!!!!) and is one of the oldest known ceramic pieces ever made.

I don't know why this got to me as much as it did, but during a scan in 2004 they found the fingerprint of a child between 7-15 on this figurine -- they probably weren't the artist, but must have handled it at some point before it was fired. and somehow that gets me real emotional haha

Venus of Monruz. Found in current day Switzerland, likely about 11,000 years old, and of a profile I feel can only suitably be described as 'absolute dumptruck'. Mostly here for the ass enjoyers to balance out the representation of glorious boobage, if I'm being honest. Some similar figurines were found in Germany and at least one of them are theorized to be made by the same artist; I find this idea absolutely delightful because I love the idea that someone so obviously Knew What They Were About back then. (The actual function of Venus figurines, whether for ritualistic/religious purposes as fertility symbols, works of art, or good old fashioned tit(t)illation is uncertain and contentious (as is the use of 'Venus figurine' as a name for them, accordingly), but in my own humble and entirely unqualified opinion: somehow this one feels deeply horny. someone here was all about that base and didn't care who knew it.)

Venus of Hohle Fels Found in current day Germany, the oldest known clear depiction of a human being we know of, dated to 40,000 -- 30,000 years old. (The Löwenmensch figurine is likely older, but it's kind of unclear if that is meant to depict a human being or a god or what. My unprofessional personal opinion: Yes, that is right; the furries got there first, and I don't see why anyone's surprised fhsdfjak.)

Several male anthropologists have said some deeply exuberantly weird and horny things about this one! It does somehow feel like I'm daring tumblr to strike me down even in the absence of female presenting nipples on display here (nevermind the 'more of a pussy out sort of look' of it all) so maybe they have a point, but I find this piece of art so deeply charming I'm ready to take the chance anyway. I adore the way the hands are rendered especially. I also cannot recommend enough that you go to the wikimedia section of this one, not least because I found THIS in there

the power of transformative art. the anime titty jiggle of our modern day applied to the oldest known human figure. art begets art across the ages

Not a piece of art as such, but the the Neanderthal skeletons found in the Shanidar Cave in the Kurdistan region of northern Iraq fascinate me. Lots of interesting speculation about the possible presence of altruism in Neanderthals brought up from this. Special shoutout to the body known as Shanidar 3: a male person who was between 40 and 50 at the time of his death, and who may have been the first guy we know of to have been stabbed to death by someone. what a claim to fame. Caesar may have done it the most but this guy did it first

This little guy

I can't stop laughing. yes that is exactly how I feel too, trace of French cave art possibly depicting a cave hyena from Le Babiliou Cave, Dordogne, France. You're saying what we're all thinking

[miserycorde]

👤+ Gideon Ofnir

Send me 👤+ a character name for my muse’s opinion on that character

"Sir Gideon Ofnir, the All-Knowing? ... Interesting, how little he actually seems to know. I have run into his proxies, but not the man himself. Does he even leave Roundtable hold? ... If not, I worry for what that indicates as far as combat capability..."

Intelligence doesn't beget wisdom, and Nepenthe thinks Gideon is the shining example of that. She finds him staunchly unimpressive, though this doesn't mean that she doesn't take him seriously as a threat -- on the contrary, she has had to dispatch his spies more than once when they got a little too close to the mausoleum.

Not that she doesn't want somebody to find it, eventually; she just doesn't want him to. Nepenthe has an inkling that he's not doing things for all of the right reasons.

Perhaps it's just a hunch, but she did happen to stumble upon a certain village, formerly full of Albinaurics...

[queerwolfsstuff]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks for the tag @eyesofatragedy67

1. How many works do you have on A03?

121 so far, that number will increase within the next couple of months.

2. What's your total word count?

3,439,494

Holy shit, and that's not including the word count of unpublished works or the original novel I'm currently editing!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Actively: Supernatural; Good Omens; Our Flag Means Death; Red, White, and Royal Blue, (MAYBE DEAD BOY DETECTIVES BACK OFF)

Past: South Park; High School Musical; Beauty and the Beast; Harry Potter; Blades of Glory; and Glee.

4. Top 5 fics by kudos:

Top 5 in general (this includes co-written fics):

In a Mirror, Darkly (written with @anyreiart) - 3,068

Red, White, and Royal Blue Balls - 2,365

Playing with Fire (written with @anyreiart) - 1,748

That Wasn’t Supposed to Fucking Happen! (written with @anyrei) - 1,387

The Heart of Ophelia (written with @anyreiart) - 1,357

Top 5 Solo Fics:

Red, White, and Royal Blue Balls - 2,365

La Rose Cachée - 1,146

Twenty After Four - 390

You Know I’m No Good - 326

And Walk Yourself to the Laundromat - 318

5. Do you respond to comments?

UGH, not as much as I should, and I used to be really good about responding to all comments, but presently my inbox on Ao3 has 4402 “unread” comments and I just… I can’t, it’s too overwhelming at this point with working two jobs. But I read and genuinely appreciate every single comment, even if I can’t reply to every single one!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ah. That’s a toss up between Nothing’s Gonna Change My World and Through the Rift Series. In my opinion, the former, but I’m sure Any would beg to differ.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oooh, fun! Ummmm. Most of them have happy endings (both literally and figuratively). I guess the “happiest” ending goes to the crack fic I wrote for Any’s birthday seven years ago. Crack in the Fourth Wall

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Oh, you betcha. The first time we got a shitty comment on a joint fic, Any said, “We’ve made it!” Thankfully, when a certain newsletter was dismantled, the anti-destiel harassment died down. I/We still get the occasional “concrit” comment from readers who think it’s an okay thing to give unsolicited writing advice, and I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: Constructive criticism cannot exist in already posted fanfiction world, you aren’t being constructive or critiquing, you’re literally filing a complaint, leaving a bad review. So either embrace the fact you’re a shitty 1-star Yelp review Karen, or stop leaving concrit.

9. Do you write smut?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

10. Craziest crossover?

I actually don’t write crossovers, but keep your eyes peeled! I recently participated in the CasDean Reverse Crossover Bang, and in a little over a week, I’ll be posting my Harry Potter crossover fic featuring art by the amazing @rezal-art!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not technically, or in a way that could be proven, but a very popular fic very much felt like a rip off of one of mine and Any’s fics, one that a well known author (a friend of the author of aforementioned rip off) made it a point to tell potential readers to not read the ending of because said author didn’t like the polyamory of it all.

Even funnier, that same author shortly after wrote their own poly fic. So, I guess personal preferences used to justify telling people to not read someone’s fic can sometimes beget a change of heart if it gets you more comments/readers.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Any and I have had a couple of our fics translated into Chinese, Russian, and Spanish! And we are here for anyone who wishes to translate any of our fics, just let us know and send us a link, and we will include it in the notes!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. At this point, I prefer to not write alone. Any needs to stop allowing it to happen.

14. All-time favorite ship?

Okay, so… technically, it’s Destiel. It’s the only pairing that survived the end of its series. Dean Winchester and Castiel are my two favorite archetypes of characters and their specific dynamic transcends canon bad endings and any type of universe.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don’t have any! The last time I posted a WIP, it took me a couple years to finish, so I promised myself I would only post completed fics from now on.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Comedic scenarios and dialogue. I like the funnies and the speakings.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

DESCRIPTIONS. I fucking hate it, okay? Why can’t you all just know what’s in my damn head? I also have a toxic, codependent relationship with commas and sentence fragments.

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

A little mixed. So, barring it being like… Latin, or a more archaic language that you use an unreliable online translator for or a language you speak, I believe for believable dialogue, you should have a friend or someone who can confirm/verify that the language is written correctly, otherwise, I vote you write, “they spoke in x language,” and interpret in the narrative. And no writing an accent in dialogue for characters where English is a second language phonetically! Like, authentic structure of a sentence, rhythm, or word choice is fine, but let’s not be offensive folks.

19. First fandom you ever wrote in?

Harry Potter over twenty years ago now. I’m an old.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Oooh, that’s fun. Ummmm. For co-written, it’s a toss up between Five Dimensions, or Dean’s Crusade: A Dance with Self Discovery with @anyreiart or Heaven on htraE with @eyesofatragedy67 and for solo it’s a toss up between I Wish for This and La Rose Cachée

Tag time! @anyreiart @punk-is-notdead and whoever else wants to do this!

[cosmicjoke]

hi, I’d like to ask what is your take about attack on titans ending and the reception it got. Do you think Isayama handled the ending well? Do you think the hate for it was valid? Because a lot of people hand different opinions about why they hated the ending. These opinions were:

1- it pulled a 180 on Eren characterization and retconned his past actions

2- some people think it made Eren sympathetic and justifiable about his actions

3- the ending glorifies fascism and genocide

4- it made everything pointless because paradise island got destroyed and the boy with dog at the will reawaken the titans at the end.

5- Isayama didn’t know what he was doing and forced to end the series quickly

I personally think the ending was amazing and widely misunderstood because even the people who praised the ending don’t even get it. They think that Eren’s actions was selfless and worth it because he got rid of the titans and made his friends into hero’s when his actions was entirely selfish and cruel.

Also do you think the ending is a copy of code geass ending? If you understood both series you would realize they are not the same at all. In fact, they are the complete opposite of each other in terms of context of the story. I don’t know how people think Eren is a copy of lelouch when the whole point is that Erens actions are not heroic and created terrible consequences.

I’d like to hear your take on this because I read several of your posts about the characters and themes of AOT and it helped elevate my perspective on the show.

I agree with you that the ending was perfect. It's not Isayama's fault if people are too stupid to understand what he was saying, lol.

But in seriousness, the ending was the only ending that the story could have or should have had, and one thing I think the negative reactions to it proved is that a lot of people who were reading AoT never understood what the story was actually about, and they need to enroll back in grade school to work on their media literacy skills, because you would have to be an actual moron to ever think AoT was promoting genocide or fascism. It does perfectly the opposite, and it shouldn't require anything more than a functioning brain and basic reading comprehension to understand that. The same for people who think it "retconned" Eren's character. Eren was always a selfish little prick who never should have had the power he was given, which in itself is a condemnation of the concepts of oppression and prejudice. Eren never would have wound up with the power he had if Marley hadn't themselves become the very monsters they accused the Eldian's of being. And also the same goes for anyone who thinks Eren's actions were framed in a sympathetic or justifiable light. How? How do they come to that conclusion? He accomplished nothing in the end but greater hostility between nations, the ruination of 80% of the world, and, inevitably, Paradis itself, by leading them down the path of radicalism and fascism. Paradis' very destruction is itself the total condemnation of Eren's actions. That people don't understand this is beyond stupid. His failure to accomplish anything good is the entire point. Of course Paradis ends up destroyed. Of course the boy and dog at the end implies the Titan curse will start all over again. Because that was always the point behind the entire story. War begets war, killing and violence in the name of any sort of ideology always leads to horror. Human beings are an innately violent and destructive animal, and war itself is a part of the human condition. If AoT had had some super happy, positive ending, it would have undercut all of that, which would have defeated the entire purpose of the story itself.

The ending is the right ending. It's the only one it could have had.

Anyway, thank you for your kind words, as well! I'm glad I'm able to help you appreciate AoT more!

[ipsen]

touka and/or chie hori for the character asks pls pls

Touka and Chie! What a delight. (sorry about the wait. am tired)

Under the cut! I don't like taking up space.

Chie first!

one aspect about them i love

Her attitude! She's a free spirit and that's really admirable. Not a lot of people have the confidence and outlook she has to do the things she does (namely leaking CCG documents).

one aspect i wish more people understood about them

I don't do deep dives in the Chie fandom, unfortunately, so I don't think I really have anything here. I guess I wish she had more influence since she's an integral aspect of TG's overall world? Humans who aren't necessarily anti-human, but rather they clash with the "necessity" of the CCG, either through outright opposing it (she steals from them) or just overall vibes (doesn't let someone's status as ghoul or human define her opinion of them).

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have about this character

Studied software engineering, but not in college. Turns out you don't need university to gain the knowledge that a degree supposedly gets you!

one character i love seeing them interact with

Shuu "Let's Launch a Cyber Attack on CCG Servers with Piss Poor Equipment in the 24th Ward" Tsukiyama. I settle my case.

one character i wish they would interact with/interact with more

I'd say "women" as a general catch-all, but that's kind of cheating since TG doesn't like when women speak to each other. Hm... I wonder what her relationship to Kaneki was like. Maybe it's explored in the novels, but I haven't read them, so I have no idea how they actually interact. I'd also like to see her talk to Hinami because Hinami always needs more friends.

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have that involve them and one other character

In the event she were to meet Urie, he'd ask her for photographs to give him inspiration for his next art piece, and she'd ask him for his art pieces to inspire her where to go next in her travels. Very tranquil type of relationship.

--

Now for Touka!

one aspect about them i love

Her penchant for observing and understanding the people around her. It goes hand in hand with her ability to reach out to people and form connections with them, regardless of any existing friction between them. Her conversation with Amon in re 117 is particularly beautiful, because of how she encourages him and how he encourages her in return. Kindness begets kindness.

one aspect i wish more people understood about them

Her penchant for observing and understanding the people around her! Even Ishida himself kinda forgot that part of her (or rather, he put that part of her on hold), especially after re 125. Like, the Dragon arc could have been completely avoided if she had a bigger role in the narrative, but she basically gets put on standby (despite demonstrating a proactive attitude for those she cares about) until it's too late.

Because of that standby, I think people call her personality in re cardboard, which it isn't, but it comes off that way. I actually love her more in re because she's mellowed out a lot and has matured since the original series.

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have about this character

I think I said this before in an old post, but I think she has a stash of biology books lying around somewhere in preparation for her attendance of Kamii, a thread that never got revisited from the original series. Adding onto that, she collaborates with Kimi and the science team post-re to finally achieve that dream of hers (I treated myself when writing Holometabolism as well with this).

one character i love seeing them interact with

Again, saying "women" is cheating, but I have to say Hinami, who she ties with for 2nd favorite character in TG. Big Sister Touka is my favorite brand of Touka. Also Ayato. I love sibling interactions in general.

one character i wish they would interact with/interact with more

Kaya Irimi. This series is oversaturated with ukaku ghouls, but I wanted to learn more about Irimi after the Owl Suppression arc. Little Sister Touka would also be a good side to see.

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have that involve them and one other character

If it were up to me, I'd put Kaya and Touka in the same apartment, upon which they welcome Hinami with welcome arms. I just think the OG Anteiku crew would be a lot more close-knit than canon thinks they are. Minority solidarity, you know?

--

That's everything! Thanks for the ask