#it doesn't have to do with anything from here tho! my brain just has been more stressed than normal about things

[izzy-b-hands]

Putting on last year's trans rigs stream from Drawfee before i have to get ready to go out with my mum and her bf today (bc i have the worst feeling in my gut he's gonna make that An Thing for me if given the chance today, aka whenever i eventually need the restroom while we're at Mystic)

[oneroomjestershow]

what if i... change my username... haha no actually im not kidding im going to do it i just don't know to what

[binniesbooks]

heyyy! absolutely loved your 100 followers special fic like it was so insanely good!!!

please can i request a bsf!beomgyu fic where he discovers through porn that women can squirt and during your next hangout he asks you about it and when you tell him you can he gets all excited and asks you to show him. this then ends in him fucking you till you squirt on his dick multiple times. can you make both beomgyu and the reader a switch if you don’t mind and only if you’re comfortable tho :) the beomgyu brain rot is getting to me 😭

• IS IT TRUE?

BG 001 .F23 2024

wc 3.6k

pairings bestfriend!Beomgyu x fem!reader

warnings switch reader x switch Gyu, mutual pining, porn watching, caught self relieving, oral sex (m. receiving), slight flood play, kissing, marking, unprotected sex, pull out method, squirting, mentions of hair pulling and scratching if you squint (+ anything I've missed)

faye's note I tried my best to make a great plot, I really did! I hope it worked. To the anon who requested this one, I'm sorry it took me so long, I was procrastinating, LMAO. SORRY 😭

"Beomgyu-" The nasty moans and lewd sounds coming from the computer were abruptly stopped when Beomgyu slammed his laptop shut. 

"What the fuck were you watching?" Yeonjun's brows creased as he stared at the younger awkwardly sitting on the bed, a pillow on his lap and a blanket covering his lower half.

"W-what?" Beomgyu stammered. 

Yeonjun's grin grew wider as his eyes scanned the room. A laptop that was forced shut, a box of tissues, a sweaty body in this air-conditioned room—what else was a guy to do, if not pleasure himself when alone?

"Damn, it looks like I've caught you at a bad time!" Yeonjun exclaimed, a faint chuckle rumbling within his chest. His teasing voice and giggles made Beomgyu blush.

"Okay, okay, I'll just talk to you later, take care of yourself first," Yeonjun said, throwing a knowing look and a teasing smile.

"H-hyung, hyung wait!" Beomgyu tried to stop Yeonjun, but the door was already shut. Besides, he can't just get up naked, can he?

He throws his head back against the pillow, groaning in embarrassment as he runs his palm against his face, muttering a frustrated "fuck" under his breath.

"So..." you started. "Why are you here again?"

"Can't a friend visit you? God, you're not as welcoming as before," Beomgyu barked, rolling his eyes as he threw the plastic bag full of snacks on the table and plopped down on your couch. And when he removes the hood of his jacket, he reveals the mess that was his hair underneath.

"I mean, you can, yeah. But... Do you know what time it is?" you replied, pulling your jacket against your body.

"3 o'clock," he answered.

"3 o'clock in what?"

"3 o'clock in the morning! But whatever!" he grunts, throwing a temper tantrum on the couch.

"Why are you here then?" you asked, sitting beside him.

"Just wanna see you. It's been a while," he muttered under his breath.

"You know you can't just drop by anytime, right?"

"I know, I know. I've just had trouble sleeping at night these past few days again," he sighed, leaning his head back on the couch.

"Am I your sleeping pill or something?" your brows raised and your voice teasing.

"What if I say that you're my medicine?" Beomgyu looked you straight in the eye. And there you are, embraced by his warm gaze, trapped inside the pretty door to his soul.

You leaned closer to him, planting a soft kiss on his cheek, running your fingers through his hair.

"Stay the night—or whatever you call the time now, I hope you have a good rest even if it's just for today." 

Beomgyu has been your friend since you were in your teenage years—typical. He shuts other girls off, as he only gives his attention to you. He doesn't want to be involved in any relationship of sort—that includes you, though. He may be your best friend, your best partner, but neither of you two admitted anything. Just two young hearts showing care and love towards each other. 

Some say you should date each other, which the two of you would only answer with a sheepish smile. Sometimes, he would drop by at your place, hang out with you, and enjoy the rest of his free time. You've been to his place a few times, but you insisted on him going to your place instead, since he's living with his friends. 

Often times, you'll share a kiss or two with him—anything but a kiss on the lips. He loves it when you sit on his lap while he plays at your computer, giving your shoulder a few bites and planting soft kisses. He loves cuddling you to sleep, draping his arm over your waist, pulling you closer to his chest, his warm breath fanning across your nape. 

Beomgyu could walk around your house half naked without you giving a fuck. He does anything as if it were his own home, and you don't mind at all. You're used to it, nothing new. 

Everything about this is pretty normal between the two of you. The kisses, the skinship, the hugs, the cuddles—anything that a 'just friends' friend won't normally do. Well, in your case, it was. 

"Can you come closer? I need to feel your warmth," Beomgyu pleaded, unzipping his jacket.

"Gyu, how much closer do you need me to be? Should I just sew my skin onto yours?" you chuckled as you shifted on the bed, scooting closer to him.

"I missed you. I missed holding you in my arms." he mumbles as he hugs you tight. 

"You're such a baby, Gyu. Do you know that?" you complained, burying your face in his chest, hugging him closer.

A few minutes had passed, yet Beomgyu was still awake. Busying himself with combing his fingers through your hair as he watches you peacefully sleep. 

His fingers traced the outline of your face. "I love you. I hope you know that," he whispered, planting a kiss to the top of your head before he shuts his eyes.

You woke up with heavy limbs draped upon your body. Beomgyu may have mistaken you for a pillow.

"Gyu... Gyu, you're so heavy, move over." Your voice cracked as you gasped for air.

"Gyu, what the hell, scoot over," you grunt again, trying to push him, but his body is far too big for you to push on your own.

"Choi Beomgyu!" You shouted.

Beomgyu squirmed. And instead of getting himself off of you, he pulled you even closer.

"What's your deal?" You frowned, trying to push him away.

Beomgyu grunts as he hides in your neck, rolling over, causing the two of you to crash down onto the floor. 

But instead of getting angry at him, your frown turned into a fit of laughter as you saw him wince and massage the back of his head and his buttocks.

"Did you have a good sleep?" you asked, stirring a cup of coffee.

"Mhm, I did, thank you. I'll get going now, the boys might already be looking for me," Beomgyu said as he pulled you in for a hug.

"You're not gonna eat breakfast here?"

His tall figure towers over you as he pinches your cheeks, "I'll do it next time. Let's have breakfast together next time, okay? Eat the snacks I brought earlier and take care of yourself." You watched him step out, closing the door behind him. 

It hadn't even been a whole 24 hours when he came back to your place.

"I wanna watch a movie; the guys are boring to be with!" he frowns, feigning frustration--- He actually never asked them to do so. Just a reason for him to drop by your place again.

"Bring the ice cream from the freezer, then," you said as you prepared the couch, bringing some soft pillows and a fuzzy blanket. 

You actually have no idea what the movie was all about. You even missed the title because you went to the restroom last minute. The only thing you know is that it's a 18+ rated movie. Well, it's not your first time watching something like this with Beomgyu, you've watched multiple movies that aren't child friendly. 

Plus, the fact that the two of you could even talk about anything sexual as if you're just talking about food and any other light topics makes this normal. Although sexually wise, neither one of you has experience. Considering that you both shut people away as if your world only revolves around each other.

And although this isn't the first time you're watching something like this with Beomgyu, it is the first time you saw him shove a pillow over his lap. It is the first time he's trying his best to avoid any skin contact with you. 

"Is everything okay? You're so distant," you commented, licking a spoonful of ice cream.

"Actually... There's.. there's something I want to ask," he started, turning his body to face you.

"That is?"

"That.. I.. Uhm, I just watched this from... You know..."

"Porn?" you bluntly answered.

"Y-yeah. And uh, is it true?"

"What's true? Geez, say it straight, Gyu," you rolled your eyes as you dug another spoonful of ice cream.

"Let me finish my sentence!" he pouts, making you chuckle. Beomgyu wasn't normally nervous around you, this is the first time.

"Is is true.. that.. girls can.. uhm.. the liquid... Like.." he continued stammering.

You looked at him straight in the eye and said, "That girls squirt?" Beomgyu nodded frantically as he tried to avert his gaze.

"It's more common than you think, Gyu," you answered as you returned your gaze to the movie. However, you're shocked about what's already happening on the TV. It was a fucking sex scene! Obscene sounds are coming from the speakers resonating in your living room. You gulped and shifted nervously.

"S-so you mean, you can do it?" Beomgyu dug his fingers into the pillow, his face painted with embarrassment and anticipation at the same time.

"Well..."

"Can you show it to me?" he said, cutting you off.

"W-what?" You looked at him in surprise. Why would a friend ask something like that?

"I.. I mean. I mean... Like..." he tried finding an appropriate approach.

"Are you initiating something, Choi Beomgyu?" You turned your whole body towards him. He bit his lower lip, his adams apple bobbed up and down as he gulped, swallowing the same embarrassment and sexual frustration.

"If... If you want to... I... I wanna see it.. I wanna see you," he whispered, his lips already red and swollen from how hard he was biting them. 

You weighed the pros and cons in your mind first. But, yeah, who cares? You're attracted to him anyway! It's a win-win situation, right?

"I swear, if you tell a single soul about this," you warned before straddling him, grabbing his shirt, and crashing your lips on his.

He forcefully pulled the pillow from his lap away, causing you to stumble a little, desperate to feel you even in the tiniest bit. His hands landed on your waist, trying to push you down on his lap.

You pulled away, "Stop. Hands off."

He stared at you with big puppy eyes and a pout, "Y/n," he whines. 

"Keep your hands off me if you want to know if it's true." Beomgyu placed his hand on his side. Trying his best not to touch you, gripping the fuzzy blanket instead, veins popping on his neck as he threw his head back. What a good day to wear sweats, he could fully feel you, and you could fully feel him hardening each second. 

Beomgyu used to order you around. He's a bit bitchy and bossy. Yet he's being pliant today. So you were enjoying this, watching him crumble under you, doing anything you were saying.

You moved your hips again, making him emit a desperate moan. Calling your name like the sex-deprived man he is, "P-please... Please it hurts..." he whines again, tears threatening to spill, nails almost tearing your blanket apart. Yet you grind again, teasing him some more. "If you cum too early, you'll end up not knowing whether it's true," you taunt. So he bucks his hips up, along with loud moans and whimpers, drowning the long forgotten movie in the background, too desperate and stimulated.

"M-more..." he whispered under his breath, almost unheard if you didn't pay attention, not wanting to get ahead of himself. 

You stopped your movement, making him groan and gasp. But blush crept up his pretty face when you moved down between his legs, spreading them open, kissing the tent on his sweats. He drapes his arm on his face as he throws his head back. He didn't know this would happen. He only asked if you could show him how you squirt, but he didn't expect for you to give him more.

"Y/n," he muttered, his hand muffling his mouth, "I-if you don't f-feel like it, you d-don't have to do this...."

"You don't want this, Gyu?" He looked down at you, only to throw his head back again when he saw you pouting with big round eyes. 

"Fuck..." He sighed, "Can I at least hold your head?"

And you let him. You let him tangle his fingers on your hair, but he's not allowed to push you down. You let him grip on your hair, but he's not allowed to pull you back.

As you pulled his sweats down, he tried his best to look at you. But he would end up closing his eyes because he can't look at you straight in the eye. 

"I won't give you a head if you don't look at me," you giggled, making him whine for the nth time.

And so he tried his best to maintain eye contact. Even when he's struggling to keep his eyes open because it feels too good. Even when he could only gasp because you're doing your best to take him whole in your mouth. He heard you gag over and over, yet he can only tangle his fingers in your hair gripping it. He wants to push you down, to fuck your pretty little mouth, to cum already, but he's waiting for your signal. He wants to be a good boy for you. He wants to be good. He wants you to praise him. He wants you to shower him with kisses later on because he was obliging to your commands.

And an idea came to your mind. You scooped out some of the melted ice cream and let it drip on his fully erect and wet cock. Beomgyu whimpers at the cold sensation.

"T-that's... Ahhh..." His voice was too shaky as he tried to form a sentence. Which he wasn't very successful in doing.

You carefully licked the melted ice cream, pushing your tongue on his slit.

"Y/n, c-can I cum? It.. ahh.. it hurts s-so much, p-please," he pleaded, drool rolling down from the corner of his lips, crying.

"Since you're too pretty, sure," you smiled sweetly, full of innocence. He lets go of your hair, placing them down on the couch, clutching on the blanket again. With one thrust in your mouth, he came undone, shooting spurts of sticky white cum inside your mouth. 

Beomgyu tried catching his breath as he looked down at you. He reached for your face, pressing on each side to make you open it. He watched your tongue swirl around the pool of his cum. Beomgyu pressed his thumb on your tongue, playing with his cum. "Swallow."

With a single command, you quickly obliged, swallowing the mix of sweet and salty taste from his cum and the ice cream. This time you felt so little under him as you sat on the floor between his legs. You opened your mouth for him to check. "Good girl," he smiled as he pulled you up, making you straddle him again.

"Did you enjoy your time ordering me around, baby?" He asked, tucking your hair behind your ear. You smiled at him, nodding with a wide grin.

His hand ran lower to your chest, touching your breast, causing you to bite your lower lip. 

"Tell me, why aren't you wearing a bra, hm?" He stared at you straight in the eye, raising his eyebrow, looking for a proper answer.

"I didn't know you were gonna drop by again," you pout.

"I see," he said, pinching your nipple.

"G-gyu..." you whimpered.

"Hm?" You looked away, clutching at the hem of your shirt. 

Beomgyu rolls your nipples against his finger again, making you quiver.

"G-gyu!" You moaned, holding his wrist. 

"What is it? Are you lost?" he chuckled, pulling your nipple.

"Ahh! Shit! Mhhmp!" you collapsed above him, hiding in his neck, whimpering and whining over and over again. You heard him let out a hearty chuckle again before wrapping his arms around your waist. 

"Too much?" he asked, and you nodded as an answer. "Okay, okay, I won't do it again, remove your pajama," he whispered.

You get off of him to discard your silk pajama, before repositioning yourself on top of him again. He kissed your forehead and played a little with the band of your panties.

Aligning his tip on your clothed pussy, he tried thrusting, teasing you, and smirking at how you squirm and pout at the stimulation.

Yet when he pushed your panties to the side, he saw the sticky wetness on the cloth from your hole. "So you're ordering me around while you're being wet like this, am I right?" he grinned.

He started teasing your pussy, pushing his red tip and letting it slide away. "Aww, too bad, I think it won't fit," he pouts, still teasing you. You whined back, wanting to feel him bare.

He teased you more and more. Until you couldn't take it anymore as you rose to your knees and aligned him against your hole, forcing your way down. You ended up collapsing in his arms again. Not prepared at all as you felt a burning pain from the stretch of his fat cock.

"God fucking damn it, don't do that again, you'll end up hurting yourself," Beomgyu winces as he tries to soothe you by combing your hair and kissing your face.

"No matter how desperate you want to feel me, don't do that again, okay? I haven't even properly stretched you out yet," he whispered, rubbing your back.

"Come here," he pulled your face to give you a kiss. A kiss that washed the pain away. Tongues fighting, teeth clashing, saliva mixing. It was nasty, lewd, and filthy. Yet you love it, moaning at the feeling. Especially when Beomgyu started to thrust his hips up, slowly training you with his size. 

His lips traveled down to your neck, leaving splotchy red marks and wet open-mouthed kisses in his wake. His hand fully grasped your breasts, slowly massaging them, occasionally rolling your nipples beneath his fingers, enjoying the way you moan his name in his ear as you catch your breath. 

Then he pulled away, holding your waist as he started his precise and delicious thrusts. 

"Deep?" he asked, tilting his head to the side with a grin. You nodded, both of your hands on his chest to keep your balance.

"How deep?" he smirked.

"H-here," you managed, pulling his hand and letting him press on your abdomen. You whimpered when he pressed harder, making you feel every curve and vein of his cock.

"Will you show me how you squirt? How did you find out you can?" he bombed you with questions, still maintaining his pace in thrusting inside your gummy walls.

"W-will show you G-gyu, will do... I ..ahh.. f-found out... One time when I t-touched myself," you started. "W-when you c-called me.. mmmph! W-with your morning voi....voice."

"You're touching yourself to my voice? Fuck, how desperate are you?" he scoffed, thrusting harder.

"W-wait! Ahh! Too m-much! Gyu!" You hid on his neck again, feeling so little and inferior. 

"I-it was only one time! I.. I never did it again!" You managed to squeak out, voice muffled on his neck.

"Then let's make you squirt again, yeah?" he sneered, pulling you back by your hair as you groan at the pleasuring pain spreading through your scalp.

He lifted you up for a bit, and he started fucking your hole with a faster and rougher pace. "Squirt on my cock, squirt on my cock." He kept on repeating it over gritted teeth, adding force to every thrust.

"G-gyu, w-wait, I'm gonna cum--" Clear liquid came out gushing from your hole, pushing his cock out along with your creamy cum, soiling your couch.

"Fuck.. do it again!" His grin grew wider as he lifted you up again and thrusted even harder with greater force.

"Gyu! Gyu! Beomgyu!" You chanted his name over and over again, your toes curled and your stomach twisted at the overstimulation. Yet he kept on fucking into you.

And again, you let out a gush of clear liquid. Whole body spasming above Beomgyu. His cock twitches as he pushes his tongue against the inside of his cheek. 

"T-this is dirty G-gyu," you muttered below your breath, body spent as you found support from his shoulder.

"No. I like it. This is fucking hot. Makes me wanna fuck you more," he laughs.

You eyes flicker across the room. The couch, the blanket, and the pillows were wet. The chocolate-flavored ice cream smeared on his pants.

Beomgyu slowly slides himself inside you again, thrusting more precisely, wanting to cum inside you this time. He buried his face in your neck as he pushed your hips down. 

"F-fuck! Wanna fill you up!" 

"P-pull out, Gyu! Please!" you pleaded, clawing his back.

Beomgyu pulls out. Hissing through his teeth, he pumped his cock a few times and ended up cumming on your tummy. 

"Fuck," he pants, leaning back on the couch and pulling you to his chest. 

You heard how his heart thumped so hard and how his breathing was so ragged. You buried your face in his neck, allowing your heart to calm down. And realization settled in. You just had sex with your best friend.

"If you won't still ask me to date you after today, I'll ask Kai out, I know he likes me." You muttered, feigning nonchalance.

"What the fuck? Do you want me to tell them how good I made you feel?" he taunts, tangling his fingers in your hair as he gives it a little pull, making you moan.

"See? Only I am allowed to see you like this, to make you so spent like this, understood?" he frowns.

"Only if you date me," you said as you latched your lips on his neck, leaving a mark of ownership.

"Fuck," he scoffed, touching the part where you left a mark when you pulled away. 

@binniesbooks 2024

[winterrrnight]

babe I just had the best idea for a rafe concept it pains me

Okay so imagine like reader is at work (somewhere idk where) and she just gets so overwhelmed but her and rafes relationship is still new so she doesn't call him because she doesn't wanna bother him....😭

I'm probably not the first person to think of this but it ON MY MINDDDD

literally dropped everything to write this!!!! this reader is way too me coded and I cannot :’) thank you so so much for the req vee 🥹💗 you asked for a concept… I wrote a fic…. :D I hope you like this vee <3

down for you

PAIRING: soft!rafe cameron x gn!reader

SUMMARY: rafe wants you to be able to rely on him for anything and everything.

WARNINGS: the reader is a preschool teacher and quite self dependent; lots of fluff; cute nicknames; lovesick rafe (my fav fr); minimal swearing

EDITH SPEAKS: this request speaks volumes to me 🥹 this is way too me coded, and I just had to write it, I hope you all like this! the ending is maybe a bit abrupt tho :( please like and reblog if you liked reading <3 feedback is always appreciated 🍹

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I should leave, I haven't yet, but when you smile, I just forget

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

You can swear this day can't get any worse. You’ve been on your feet basically the entire day, always rushing from your students here to there. You love the little kiddos with your entire heart, but today, for some reason, they are being an extra pain in the ass. They aren’t as cooperative as you’d prefer; you don’t know what’s gotten into them, they are like little energy packets constantly running around.

Due to some teacher duties you aren’t even able to sit down for your lunch break, taking away the only 15 minutes you have to yourself. And it just gets progressively worse when you finally leave the school to go back to your place and your car has a slashed tire, and today had to be the day when you don’t have a spare tire in your trunk.

It’s been over 6 hours since you left your house this morning, and it’s just Tuesday, but it’s feeling like the longest, most excruciating week ever. You’re now leaning against your car door, letting out a deep exhale as you lean your head back, feeling a headache creep into your brain and pulse harshly. You’re tired, hungry, absolutely exhausted… and all you want are the warm hugs of your boyfriend.

Your boyfriend.

Rafe is quite a new addition in your life, both of you being together for a mere month. He’s been so loving to you, always protective and just genuinely taking great care of you.

You pull out your phone and find his contact, but before you can dial him, your thumb hovers over his name in sudden realization – he’s always at work at this time.

You begin to contemplate your initial decision of asking him to come here to help you out, and then ultimately decide against it, realizing he’s probably very busy at work, and would only be heavily distracted if you call him.

So, just like how you always do it, you decide to take matters into your own hands.

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

It’s nearing 6 pm when you finally get to reach your place. You had to make calls to get yourself a mechanic to get your car fixed, who took his sweet sweet time to come to you. You’re now completely exhausted, wanting nothing more than just to plop on your bed and sleep till your heart desires. You can hear your stomach grumble since you never had the chance to eat the lunch you missed out on, but you make it a problem for later, deciding to just take a nap first.

As you drive into your driveway, you recognise Rafe’s black Range Rover already parked, with him standing next to it, leaning back against the hood of his car as he’s looking intently at his phone. As he catches the sound of your car driving, he instantly looks up, watching your car enter the driveway.

Before you can properly park and get out, Rafe rushes to you, opening the door for you.

“Oh my god where have you been?” He asks you, his voice laced with concern. “I tried calling you and texting you, you always come back home by late afternoon,”

You step out of the car and Rafe shuts the door, a hand quickly landing at the small of your back as you both walk to the porch of your house. He can see you’re really tired; droopy eyes, heavy steps, deep sighs; he knows something happened.

“Yeah my phone died,” you mutter as you unlock the main door of your house, both of you stepping inside. “I just… today was kind of a heavy day, nothing much honestly,” you shrug as you toss your keys in the dish and remove your coat and shoes.

“What happened?” Rafe asks, still really concerned for you as he watches you take off your cost and hang it on the coat rack. As you’re done, you face him with a small smile on your face.

“Nothing much, really,” you say softly, gently cupping his cheek with a hand and tenderly caressing his skin. “Don’t worry, yeah?” You mumble, taking your hand off his cheek as you make your way to the kitchen.

Rafe stays on your heels, following you and monitoring every single move of yours – your padding till the fridge, opening it, getting a bottle of water, unscrewing it and drinking from it.

“You look so exhausted, I can see it in your eyes,” he comments. “Your hair is all messy, your clothes are dirty; it’s clearly not nothing. Come on, tell me, what happened,”

His voice is stern, but not in an angry way; but in an apprehensive way. He moves his hand to your face, gently brushing your hair as he fixes some of the unruly strands.

As you finish drinking your water; drinking almost all of it in one go, you keep your bottle aside and let out a sigh, turning to look at him. “It was just one of those… heavy days, but it’s over now yeah? I’m now home,” you say softly.

“But just tell me what happened,” Rafe’s voice now drops to a whisper as he moves closer to you, continuing to weave his fingers through your hair.

You close your eyes for a moment, delving into the relaxing feeling of Rafe’s fingers softly combing through your hair, but also realizing he’s going to keep pressing for you to tell him what happened.

“The kids were a bit uncooperative today,” you say with a soft chuckle. “And then we have this event coming up at school, so I was busy for my entire lunch break preparing for it. And then my car had a flat tire and I didn’t have a spare so I had to get a mechanic, which took most of the time. But besides that, nothing much happened,” you say with a small shrug.

“Besides all that?” Rafe mutters incredulously. “That’s already a lot, baby, why didn’t you call me when you found out about your flat tire? I would’ve come; or sent someone to get you, we would’ve had lunch in my office, and I would have had someone take care of the tire and bring your car back too.” There’s a small frown on his face and he now holds your face in both his hands, gently skimming your cheeks with his thumbs.

You look up in his soft, baby blue eyes. “I did think of calling you but-”

“But?”

“But I thought…” you take a deep breath, your eye contact with him faltering. “you’ll be busy, and I didn’t want to be a burden to you, really, I was able to get it all fixed just fine,”

You can hear Rafe tsk; his tongue clicking against his teeth as he softly shakes his head. “I’m never busy for you okay? My work does not ever get more importance than you, okay? It never does, and it never will, especially when you’re in trouble and need help,”

He gently grips your chin and tips your head back just a bit, making you look at him. His eyes are softened, the blue even more warmer than usual.

“I know you prefer to do things on your own,” he whispers, “but you have to realise that you really don’t need to do each thing on your own, especially now that I’m around. I won’t mind, really, and besides, I would love to show everyone off at work that I am the boyfriend of the most beautiful person on this damn planet yeah?”

You can’t help but chuckle softly at his words as you keep looking in his eyes.

“So, promise me, next time you need any sorts of help, want me to do something for you, or just want me to be there, you don’t think twice about calling me up okay?” He says softly, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

He can see the reluctancy in your eyes, but you eventually give in and nod.

“Okay, promise,” you murmur, smiling as you wrap your arms around his waist, hugging him tightly. He gladly hugs you back, snuggling his face in your neck as he gently rubs your back.

“So…” you speak up, and he hums back in response, both of you still hugging.

“I’ll take up on that offer right now. I’ll go and shower, and you make something for me to eat yeah?”

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

TAGLIST: @runningfrom2am @saccharinesammie @maybankslover @totalswag @madelynie @chenslucy @ietss @elle-mp3 @viawritesstuff @wallsdreams @lunalitva @sadfury @shores-kayla @jamesbuckybarneswify @xxxlaura @thatsthewaythechrissycrumbles @callsignwidow @starkowswife @drewstarkeyswifehoe @jjchaer @f4ll-for-you @wearemadeofstardust0 @drewsmusee @rafegirly @addriaenne @leighbronk @rafesdrew @bejeweledreverie @raf3sgff @aerangi @drewstarkey1bae @moneymaybank @spideysimpossiblegirl @the-tortured-poets-depxrtment @rafesgiirl @theoraekenslover @fals3-g0d @personalfavsthatarerandom @b1mb0slvt

[ddejavvu]

Omggg I love the fic of drunk reader kissing Spencer, could you write a second part to that? Maybe he takes reader home and she asks him to stay over and she wakes up all giggly and embarrassed (even tho she doesn’t regret it) after seeing his face stained w the lipstick? Thank you🥰

part 1

--

Spencer wakes up to the distinct feel of something wet and slimy on his face, two sensations that he's not prepared for or happy with.

He blinks his eyes open and you're hovering above him, one of his cheeks cupped in your hand while you smear a makeup wipe over his forehead.

"Oh, Spence," You fret, "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to wake you up, I thought you'd be tired enough to sleep through it."

Spencer's such a light sleeper that a gentle breeze could wake him. But he's not going to tell you that; he doesn't even think that he can. The feeling of his face held so delicately in your hand while you tend to his rather messy skin is something that's managing to short circuit his typically agile brain, and all he can do is watch as you wipe away your lipstick from the night prior.

"I got you good," You muse, tone cautiously amused. He manages a bashful smile and nod, and you target a kiss mark beside his left eye now.

"I was really drunk," You laugh bashfully, "Sorry, Spence. I- uh, I saw the picture Hotch took, he sent it to our group chat. I'm sure you didn't want me crawling all over you. I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable.

"No," Spencer isn't good at speaking right now, but he knows he has to, "No, don't worry about it. Everyone's more wild when they're drunk."

"Except for Rossi," You reason, smudging away the final mark on his chin now, "He just gets philosophical."

Spencer sits up from where he'd been reclined on your couch, and there's an ache in his back. It was worth it though, and he hopes you don't apologize for him having to sleep on the couch.

"I'm sorry you had to sleep on the couch," You lament like clockwork.

"It's okay," Spencer insists, straightening his spine and hearing a slight pop, "I don't mind, really. I wouldn't have wanted to leave you here alone."

"In my own apartment?" You quirk a brow at him.

"I wanted to make sure you didn't throw up in your sleep," Spencer nods, "Because people can choke and die that way."

You look mildly alarmed, and Spencer thinks he needs to work on his flirting skills.

"But- uh, you didn't. Which is great." He smiles, lips pulled into a slightly curved line, and you mirror the expression.

"Great," You echo, "Do you want breakfast?"

"Uh- sure." Spencer nods, rising from the couch, "I can help make it-?"

"No, no," You rush back to him from where you'd been heading towards the kitchen, pushing at his shoulders until he falls back down onto the couch, "Just stay there, Spencer. You helped me a ton last night, I owe you one. Okay?"

He disagrees; you could never owe him anything. He'd give his all to you with no expectation in return. But he nods to appease you, "Okay."

"Okay." You repeat with a smile, and hesitantly, you lean in to kiss his now-clean cheek.

"No lipstick this time," You grin bashfully as you pull back, but his face is tinged so red that you think you're mistaken for a moment, "Thanks, Spence."

[ronance4everbrainrot]

Some moooore little incorrect quotes from Descendants! This is gonna be a long one, sorry not sorry.

(with ships)

Audrey: *kisses Uma*

Uma: !

Audrey: ...Did you steal my chapstick?

Uma: Did- did I what?

Audrey: My chapstick, Uma. Did you steal it?

Ben: Audrey, for the love of God, not this again.

Uma: I- No, I didn't steal your chapstick. We use the same chapstick.

Audrey: No, there is absolutely no way we use the same chapstick, because it was only sold on one Etsy shop two years ago and they discontinued it, and I loved it so much that I bought the last of their stock, and I keep it in my freezer so it doesn't go bad. It's been discontinued for three years. No one uses the same chapstick for three years. So unless you've been eating a whole fuck ton of something that's flavored like chocolate and popcorn, you absolutely stole my fucking chapstick.

Uma: Chocolate and popcorn?

Ben: Why do you think it got discontinued?

(WHY IS THERE NO YELLOW! I DON'T WANT TO MAKE BEN BLUE! I ALREADY HAVE SO MANY BLUE ONES! Also slay and wtf? What a great start)

---

Ben: Do you think I'm plastic?

Audrey: No.

Ben: Phew. Oka-

Audrey: Plastic, at least, has some use in life. You're not plastic.

(Damn. What did he do to yo-..oh.. right.. yeah. I've also decided to make him Orange because it's close to yellow)

---

Ben: War is heck!

(facts)

---

Chad, to Ben: If my dad doesn't say "I'm King of the world" within an hour on that boat, I will give you my next pay check.

Charming, within 5 minutes of getting on the boat: I'M KING OF THE WORLD!!!

(Absolutely. Canon)

---

Audrey: God, if only someone loved me…

Uma: *standing behind them with roses*

Ben: *holding box of chocolates*

Chad: *has balloons and a card*

Mal: *facepalms* This is sad.

(Me: *holding a big Teddy Bear* lol I had a crush on her only in the Third movie. Loved her Queen of Mean Era)

---

Chloe: So, what is Red to you?

Maddox: The reason I wake up every morning.

Chloe: ...That’s adorable.

Red earlier that morning, barging into Maddox's room, smacking pans together: WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP!!!

(They've got this sibling bond)

---

Chloe: Are pigeons drones?

Chad: What? No, I'm trying to sleep.

Chloe: Think about it. How come you've never seen a baby pigeon? And why do you never actually see a pigeon nest? Because they're DRONES!

Chad: *Crying* Please let me sleep...

(Sibling sleepover. Also Chloe, your Mary Anne is showing)

---

Red: I intend to stay pissed at you forever.

Red: Even if I seem helpful.

Maddox: Then you're in luck.

Maddox: Because you don't.

(Canon)

---

Uma: Hello all, it is I, your favorite person.

Carlos: Actually, Jane is my favourite.

Uma: Okay then, it is I, that bitch.

(Yup and I love you. Carlos and Jane✨🫠)

---

Evie: I love making parties more interesting by telling strangers “I want you to know that I personally have no problem with you being here.”

(Sweet and dangerous. Perfect.)

---

Uma: Evie said its my turn with the brain cell.

Mal: Square up.

(lol. Canon.)

---

Uma: What starts with F and ends with Uck?

Chad: No it doesn't.

Jane: Firetruck!

Mal: FUCK!

(Mal speaks my mind. Jane is smart and Chad got the spirit. He's not wrong tho.)

---

Jay: Good morning. As you begin your day, remember that violence is always an option and often the answer.

Carlos:

Jay:

Carlos: ...Please, go back to bed.

(Jay loves to annoy everyone. Mostly Mal.)

---

Carlos: I can do anything I put my mind to. I once figured out Jane's phone number just by choosing random numbers.

(..why didn't you just ask? But also impressive)

---

Chad: What's the scariest horror movie you've ever watched?

Chloe: IT.

Dizzy: Annabelle.

Maddox: Paranormal Activity.

Red: High School Musical. All throughout high school I was scared that everyone was gonna randomly get up and start singing and dancing, and I would be the only one who doesn't know the words.

(Honestly just did this because Kylie was in the HSMTMTS. Honestly. They do that in Auradon too. So watch out)

---

Red: Why is it so hard for you to believe me?!

Chloe: ...

Red: Oh, right. The lying.

(Has she ever lied to Chloe? I don't think so. But I find the quote funny)

---

Evie: A mouse!

Mal, pulling out a knife: Go back to where you came from or I'll stab you.

Jay, pulling out a frying pan: It'll make a nice meal!

Carlos, giving the mouse cheese: You deserve a treat, little guy.

Gil, gasping: It's Ratatouille!

Harry: His name is Remi, dummy.

Evie: ...I was going to say to just trap it and throw it out the window... what is wrong with you people.

(um.. yeah.. you know what-)

Chloe: A mouse!

Dizzy, pulling out a knife: Go back to where you came from or I'll stab you.

Celia, pulling out a frying pan: It'll make a nice meal!

Maddox, giving the mouse cheese: You deserve a treat, little guy.

Chad, gasping: It's Ratatouille!

Red: His name is Remi, dummy.

Chloe: ...I was going to say to just trap it and throw it out the window... what is wrong with you people.

(just some family time)

---

Chad: Sometimes I like to call people by the wrong name to show them I don’t care about them.

Red: That’s brilliant.

Chad: Thank you, Maddox.

(yeah)

---

Jay: Everyone has a toxic trait. Except Carlos, they’re perfect.

Carlos: Wrong! My toxic trait is how badly I want to domesticate a raccoon.

(Facts. He is perfect)

---

Red: Hold the fuck up.

Chloe: Excuse me?

Red: I said hold the fuck up.

Chloe:

Red: I’m the fuck up, hold me.

(Aww...canon.. I mean she's not a fuck up. Maybe in her mother's eyes. But aww)

---

Jay: You know, there’s something weird going on with your face?

Mal: What?

Jay: You’re smiling! I didn’t know you could do that?

(Because she and Evie finally got together. UwU)

---

Evie: How do you tell someone their breath stinks?

Jay: Hey, I'm bored, let's drink mouthwash.

(He definitely did that with his teammates)

---

Jay: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river.

Evie: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in their own pool. Big difference.

(Oof. Do I want to know?)

---

(Little surprise from the past)

Charming: Care to give a free sample to a pretty person?

Ella, manning a bake sale and tired of their shit: Sure! You know one?

Charming:

Charming: Care to give a free sample to an ugly person?

(he's trying)

---

Brigdet: I have a question.

Ella: Shoot.

Bridget: Is the S or C in scent silent?

Hook: Fuck you, I’m going to be thinking about this all day.

Ella: Okay well, cent is pronounced the same way as scent so I’m gonna say the S is silent.

Bridget: Okay, but sent is also spelled the same way.

Hook: Google says that the C was added in the late seventeenth century, so I guess the S is silent.

Morgie: Plot twist, both the S and the C are silent and the E actually makes the sss sound.

Hook: Morgie is not allowed to talk anymore.

(Just them having a double date)

---

Bridget: Made you all playlists!

Bridget: Hades and Maleficent, yours have only heavy metal, and is dark like your soul.

Bridget: Ella and Uliana, yours have sad songs and blues to pair with your crippling depression.

Bridget: Charming, Morgie and Hook have the ABBA Gold album.

(she knows them well)

---

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*

Ella: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.

Everyone:

Bridget: ...I did. I broke it.

Ella: No. No you didn't. Uliana?

Uliana: Don't look at me. Look at Morgie.

Morgie: What?! I didn't break it.

Uliana: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Morgie: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

Uliana: Suspicious.

Morgie: No, it's not!

Hook: If it matters, probably not, but Maleficent was the last one to use it.

Maleficent: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

Hook: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Maleficent: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, James!

Bridget: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Ella.

Ella: No! Who broke it!?

Everyone:

Hook: Ella... Hades has been awfully quiet.

Hades: rEALLY?!

*Everyone starts arguing*

Ella, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.

Ella: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Ella:

Ella: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

(Damn Ella)

---

Bridget: It’s just that lollipop sticks last longer than the head, even if they’re less flavorful. I’m thinking of paper sticks, because you can peel off the layers with your teeth or leave it there until they fall off naturally, but plastic sticks can be chewed on too or left sticking out like a cigarette. Paper straws can be eaten layer by layer over time though, so they have the edge.

Morgie, bored: Can’t we just leave while they’re distracted?

Ella, genuinely interested: But what about wooden sticks?

Morgie: I hate you.

(No. It doesn't taste good and it's flaky? I don't like the paper ones. I like the plastic ones. Love to chew on them, tastes neutral ig idk. Wooden sticks tho. Taste great. And you can chew on them. But they break easily and you could get a splinter I think? But still Wooden wins for me. Plastic second and then paper)

---

Hope you liked it!

This was a bit longer.

Sorry not sorry.

Byeee.

[libertatias]

hello, i am here to ask you about your clown yaoi hcs <3

a lot of these are based on an rp i did with a buddy of mine but here are some of my faves:

shanks has a box of letters he's never sent because buggy never answered his first one and shanks doesn't want to be a bother :(

(they're both idiots because buggy absolutely read it and wrote a reply but then ripped it up bc no!! he won't let shanks get the better of him!!)

toki taught them how to dance while they were on the oro jackson and after they finally get together post-timeskip, one of the first things they do is dance together the way toki taught them

buggy is immune to and from shanks' haki and always thought this was normal bc they were practically inseparable as kids so why tf would he be scared of shanks (it is not normal. no one can explain it)

(they swore a literal blood oath when they were like 10 that they would always be there for each other. shanks' haki recognizes a piece of itself in buggy. neither one of them is aware of this)

this also means shanks has never been able to sense buggy with observation haki, which absolutely terrified him when he first awakened it as a kid because he could feel everyone and everything too much too loud but not buggy, why couldn't he feel buggy

shanks' observation awakening also happened during the whole shiki shitshow at edd war so not only was there a HUGE STORM and buggy possibly drowning to worry about but so much death and anger and fear and he couldn't sense buggy in any of it

roger had to separate these wet kittens bc shanks was having a mild mental breakdown and buggy was not helping bc buggy has never understood the whole haki thing and shanks was so afraid buggy didn't feel anything about him bc buggy was the only quiet part of the storm but buggy was also safe and it was just a mess and a half until shanks' brain stopped exploding

so much of their miscommunication stems from the fact that shanks is absolutely garbage at reading buggy (and he can't even cheat with haki) and the fact that buggy always assumes shanks means something he doesn't (king of catastrophizing everything shanks says) — especially when he does actually know what shanks meant and can't deal with shanks being so brutally honest

eventually, once they're more established as an Actual Couple (or something close to it) they sort of stumble their way into experimenting with buggy's devil fruit power which results in what i like to call armsharing

buggy lets shanks borrow his arm and through a combination of like deliberately giving his will over to shanks and inexplicable haki nonsense (the intimacy of literally giving a piece of yourself to another person wholly and freely), shanks is able to control the arm, but buggy can still feel it as an extension of his body

while shanks is in control of the arm, he can also use haki on it (like hardening or what have you), but for the first time buggy can also feel shanks' haki (which feels so much like roger buggy almost loses it) and shanks, for the first time, can sense buggy's feelings

he still can't see buggy's aura tho bc it is, in fact, too enormous to be seen by looking directly at it but is radiating every feeling he's ever felt about shanks at full capacity

the first time they armshare shanks cries bc it's like he's seeing buggy for the first time with his eyes wide open and he can finally finally feel the immensely overwhelming love pouring off buggy in waves (that he always wanted to believe was there but never knew for sure)

it only works when shanks is borrowing the arm tho so as soon as buggy takes it back, haki immunity is reinstated :(

they get married post-canon and fuck off to live on a houseboat together until they have a kid and shanks panics bc he can't live at sea with two drowning risks who are also THEE most important ppl in his life

so they move back to karai bari and establish a real town there that isn't just circus tents and it's very cute and domestic but also mildly annoying for shanks bc croc and mihawk just never left and now croc is mayor i guess bc no one else wanted the job

their kid is named giacomo who they call their little jackpot or just jack for short

jack grows up and wants to be just like his dads and granddads and eventually apprentices in shipbuilding so he can build his own ship in homage to the oro jackson that he calls the oro jackpot

shanks and buggy and the rest of roger's surviving crew all have small pieces of the oro jackson that they've held onto all this time and they donate these pieces to the oro jackpot so roger will live on in that ship too

[tookthe-405]

VBS

Chapter 2: Damage gets done ~ hozier (MY LOVE)

DAILY CLICK🍉 DONATE ON

LINKS🇵🇸 GOFUND.ME!!

a/n: again, sorry this took so long, life’s been stressful but I hope y’all like it <33 its long af tho

this is honestly just me messing around with happiness and then destroying it soon 😍

c/w: smut in future chaps!!, religious trauma, internalised homophobia, religious manipulation/abuse, implied abuse by parent

summary: you grew up religious without questions and in summer you would get send to vacation bible school. The camp always felt like prison to you, until a very interesting girl appeared.

7/22/2007 (sunday, week 1)

Readers pov:

10:02 a.m

The faces of the others were frozen as you trudged back to the hostel, which you couldn't blame them for. You don't see two girls with wet clothes here every morning, and the fact that you had to walk past the dining room to get to the stairs didn't exactly help you stay inconspicuous.

You and Ellie lost track of time a bit and were already too late when you noticed that breakfast had already started. The dining room doesn't really have a single door, the room was just completely open with no wall or door that could have protected you from being seen.

Giggles and agitated whispers immediately started as Ellie walked past the large room and down the corridor. Pastor Tobias' eyes pierced into back of your head as you walked past the hall.

Ellie found it all very entertaining and waved to a group of people who greeted her back with a laugh.

You, however, couldn't meet anyone's gaze, not your friends and certainly not Pastor Tobi's.

With your head bowed and your wet hair hitting your red cheek, you quickly fidget past all the spectators.

After 2 days, the events came dry from the lips of the people and you and Ellie could walk through the halls with a little less shame.

Or at least you did.

Ellie didn't think the whole thing was so bad. She said she didn't care and that it was worth it. That you hadn't done anything wrong, and she was right, you hadn't done anything bad.

But guilt was beggingly nibbling at your skin, hoping to be let into your brain where you would make up some fucked up mistake.

The singing of the choir and hazel next to you make it a little harder to think about all this, but not impossible. With your luck, you might dream about it. The whole scene in front of you, is so familiar that it feels like you are timely. The many children of different ages who sing their souls out to be enough.

Some of them are also really good, and some are good and love to sing. But they will probably not get any further than your little congregation, because it was explained to you from an early age that those talents you own are there to serve God and only him.

Acting out of free will would make you feel too guilty.

Your gaze rushes behind a shoulder to Ellie, and even she sings with it. Ellie seems to have made friends with a group of boys and girls a few days ago. She fits in pretty well, everyone looks like they don't feel like being here.

The short-haired girl catches your eyes and winks at you slightly, which makes you grin. She's so inserious, it's to laugh sometimes. With the same grin, she makes a small movement with her fingers and hands that looks as if she is composing something on an invisible piano. You understand that she just wants to tease you and show her a guitar-playing gesture.

"Don't do that!"

The hissing in your ear scares you, and you shake together briefly. After you have stretched your body forward again, and your shoulders feel like wooden boards, you give Hazel an apologetic look.

She unobtrusively holds a finger to her lips instead of telling you to shut up.

But her look is not as angry as she sounded, she admonishes you to stay out of trouble and you have to admit, that has often saved your ass.

When you were smaller, you wanted to try out almost everything, whether it was because of your quick trust in other people or because you just hated yourself too much to have any self respect left, no matter what it was, it almost messe up your life. Or rather your social life in church. And Hazel was like a warning hand that pulled you back again and again, saving yiuin the last moment.

When the piano music ends quietly and slowly, everyone sits down again, and a squeak sounds through the room. The piano that is played on every morning is old, but still sounds quite good. You could play all the hillsong songs and the old ones of your grandparents with your eyes closed if you had to, but Tanja does a good alternative job for you.

Your mother liked it so much, when the piano was played in the service that she thought it would be all the more beautiful if her daughter sat up there.

"Good morning everyone"

The older pastor leans against his narrow pedestal with the large cross on front and looks slowly through the rows.

"Personally, I find that 2 days are enough to get used to a life in nature and among themselves with God" he sighs tired for a short time as if he is already disappointed about something.

"Tomorrow you will go to the city with your assigned room partners and grou leaders and spread God's word”

Groaning resounds around in the room, most of pre teens who would rather do anything else than talk to strangers in the summer heat. Your group also has less desire, but this happens here every year like a kind of tradition, so you've been preparing for it.

"Not only that! The kitchen also prepares candied apples, which you can then all hand out nicely together!"

That was new. However, you understand the purpose behind it, you would also like it more to sit and listen here with a candied apple. In recent years, so many people have slammed the door in front of your nose that a few apples can't be bad.

"Hey girls" Louisa's voice makes you all look over your shoulder.

She kneels in front of you to be able to whisper better and more inconspicuously.

"You have kitchen duty this afternoon, please don't forget it and don't plan anything"

you all nod in Union.

"fuck"

"Kate!" Admonished hazel.

"What? It always takes like what? 2 hours?-"

"2 hours and 46 minutes" you improve her.

The four girls look at you confused.

"I stopped time last year out of boredom"

hazel grins at you, you twist your eyes but there is also a soft smile on your lips. You know exactly what's going through her head.

'That's so weird but just too sweet'

"I can't even remember the last time" murmurs naveah dreamy, her gaze rigidly on the ceiling.

"Probably because it was so traumatic that your brain simply deleted it for you" Kate dramatically her index finger against her head.

"It wasn't so bad, Kate exaggerates."

"I don't"

"my legs hurt all day"

Kate's and Mia's voices roll over and you smile. Hazel looks at you questioningly. You gambled with your shoulders.

"2 hours and 46 minutes Hazel..."

the girl shakes her head and her brown curls fall around her face a few times. "I thought it was okay"

Kate snorts. "Haze you would walk around in underwear in the snow if it happened in the name of the church."

"You wouldn’t?

11:38 a.m (sunday, week 1)

Three. You got 3 soccer balls shot in your face within 1 hour. You're not surprised that one of them was from Caleb, but the other two were shot by the same pretty black-haired girl, and it didn't look like she was sorry.

"What the…"

You stare at her and Caleb's backs during the water break and hope that it was just a coincidence, even if deep down you know that it wasn´t.

"Does he still not like you?" Naveah, sweating, picks up her water bottle while her eyes wander from time to time between you and Caleb.

You shrug, now more focused on Caleb fooling around with some guys.

The air in the gym was incredibly thick and almost unbearable, but the leaders still talked you into a soccer match. It was more or less Hazel's decision anyway and you guys do everything she does. The high windows let in the warm sun, whose heat wasn't particularly welcome right now.

The teams are mixed, meaning there are boys and girls on the same teams, aged 16 to 18. There weren't many, but enough to at least form 2 fair groups with even a few substitutions on the bench.

Ellie is nowhere to be seen , which doesn't surprise you, you regret ever saying yes to this, but you miss her in the disgusting, sweaty, narrow air. Her presence and her funny jokes would have been the only thing that could have made this a little less shitty.

"What's the deal with him anyway?" Naveah doesn't seem to let this go.

"We just don't like each other, that's just how it is sometimes."

She frowns.

"I don't think you can hate each other so much without a reason."

"I don't hate Caleb, I don't really care about him"

Naveah lets out a snort.

"Damn didn't know you could be a little bitchy too"

Caleb turns briefly in your direction and you take that as a sign to turn away and finally sit down for the next 8 minutes. Naveah does the same.

“I think everyone can be a little bitchy, you can’t like everyone and everything”

“Jesus could”

“Well im not Jesus”

she stretches her legs out next to you and sighs deeply.

"I know, even if this doesn't sound good, I sometimes find the principle of the church really fucked up. I try to love everyone, even people who do bad things to me, but it doesn't always work."

You're very surprised that she comes to you with this, but now that she did, you want to give her the best comfort you can.

"That's okay, naveah. We're neither God nor Jesus, we can do some things and we can't do some other. And we find a lot of things difficult. So Hate who you want"

naveah laughs and then becomes creepily serious again.

"Thanks, since you became friends with Ellie, you seem more relaxed to me."

Thinking, you try to remember your life before Ellie, but you can't. Before that everything was much more colorless, it didn't make as much sense as it does now.

"yes, I guess"

"no matter what Hazel says, you're right, Ellie isn't bad. How can a bad person make someone else this happy?"

12:24 p.m (sunday, week 1)

You haven't heard from Ellie all morning. It was almost as if she had completely disappeared, and if you're honest, you've had the feeling for a while that one day, she would just run away from here.

You wouldn´t hold it against her, but you would still feel dejected and left behind.

naveah and you talk a lot more after the game, she's more like you than you thought and you think she's good company. She understands your humor and you don't feel stupid or judged after every sentence you say.

It often happens to you that you wish for a world and reality in which it was always so easy to live. Where not every breath you take feels wasted.

You try very hard not to think about Caleb or your siblings back home. Homesickness seemed to catch up with you sooner or later anyway, but you didn't expect it to happen so quickly.

The summer heat was bearable, but it was still uncomfortable, so you spent most of your time indoors. Shortly after 12, Naveah suggested playing a few rounds of Uno with you, and since there was nothing better to do, you agreed.

"My father taught me uno, I can still remember that"

there is a very faint smile in her voice that touches your ears. She sounded a bit sad, as if she´s mourning that time of her life.

"I don't know your father at all"

you put a wish card on top of the pile of other cards. One round probably turned into a few.

"He's not really a christian, sometimes I think that's why he is the way he is"

"What do you mean?"

"He has a lot of emotions, he doesn't know what to do with them."

Christian parents are often very strict, as there are many rules in both parenting and the Bible that you have to follow. But since Naveah is talking about her atheist father, you don't really have a picture of what she really means, both your parents are religious.

"I don't understand exactly what you mean naveah…"

half of your brain is focused on the girl in front of you and the other half on the cards on the floor. Naveah moved around a little to sit down a little more comfortably, but this position didn´t seemed to free her from the emotional discomfort.

"Sometimes he doesn't know where to put all the anger. My mother doesn't help much with that either. Both of them know how to provoke each other, but only one of them knows how to deal with feelings."

"I still don't know what you mean? How does that affect you and your fathers relationship?"

It seems absurd to you how you talk about something like that while you're playing Uno, but if that's what she needs.

"Girls, lunch is ready and then you have to rinse off."

Louisa's voice flashes through the room and everyone moves quickly, but you make a mental note to talk to her about it later. You walk at a slow pace down the hallway and the other girls just rush past you. You remember how easy everything seemed to you at that age.

On the second floor you meet Jonathan.

“Hey you got wash up duity, don’t you?”

A dramatic groan leaves your mouth and you nod.

Joanthan is nice. You know his parents very well and you both grew up together as often as you saw each other at school and he was one of the only boys who wasn't interested in bullying girl for fun.

"Are you in the same room with Samuel?"

“Samuel and Austin, luckily”

You nod in understanding and see your group of girls whizzing past you out of the corner of your eye. Hazel turns to you briefly and gives you that grin and suddenly you know exactly what's going on here. An unpleasant feeling spreads through you and you try hard to ignore it.

"yeah… it's nice that you're still friends"

"I can't believe how long I've been able to put up with these two"

You giggle a little bit uncomfortable and think about the many pranks the three boys have pulled off. Both here in the camp and at school.

“Have you planned any new pranks?”

"hmm I don't know if I can tell you that" Jonathan grins at you.

"Well, if I hear something about a prank, I know who it was."

He shrugs and chuckles softly.

"Do you know what you're planning to do after the summer holidays? Now that we've finished school." you ask him.

He doesn't seem so sure about his answer.

"Not really, I don't know yet whether I want to stay here or go further away. Samuel wants to study in new york, I feel a bit left behind"

left behind. You know the fear of that as well.

"No matter what you decide, you have a future everywhere, time goes by either way"

he smiles at you and combs a few thick curls out of his face. You notice that he's looking at you longer than necessary.

"Hey would you like-" "Jesus where are they?"

You try strenuously to find Hazel's brown curls over the many people's heads, but they are nowhere to be seen.

"Sorry Jonathan, I have to find the others before they can no longer manage to save a seat for me."

you lie coldly to his face.

Without any further words, you quickly march through the many groups. You can feel his confused look burning at your spine, but whatever he wanted wasn't what you wanted.

You notice two things in the dining room.

Luckily Hazel secured a spot for you and Ellie is talking to the girl who shot a fucking ball at you. Twice.

Ellie's face seemed neutral, she was smiling slightly.

Jealousy overcomes you and you´re embarrassed at how quickly and unexpectedly it happens. Your cheeks redden and you feel very immature, like in middle school when you were mad that Hazel had other friends besides you.

You sit down in silence next to Hazel, who has already placed a plate at your place. Some pureed vegetable soup that you have to force down.

"What did Jonathan want?" Kate leans forward eagerly.

Unexpectedly, Jonathan is a good distraction for once.

"You're being so childish"

"Come on, we're just curious"

That's how it was always with the boys. No matter what people say, Christian girls are obsessed with boys, no matter how much the feeling of guilt trys to destroy that. For many, boys even come before God in terms of interest.

Not necessarily boys, but more the romance itself. The acceptance and recognition of being enough for a man.

Your eyes flick to Ellie, who is still talking to her about something seemingly funny. Of course you don't care.

“He didn’t want anything from me and even if he did it i would not care.”

1:14 p.m (sunday, week 1)

You are just waiting to be let into the kitchen. It's nothing unusual to take on kitchen duty in camp. It's a kind of thank you from the church to the kitchen for cooking warm food every day. Every girl's room gets a turn twice a year. After the girls' rooms have all been through to the second time, there are two more boys' rooms so that it doesn't get unfair. Ironic isn´ it?

Every year it's the same, every year you can hear the boys crying and complaining when they're the ones who have to do it this year. Now was your day where you have to wash 200 dishes. The staff and managers involved.

Ellie isn't here yet. She can't really have forgotten it, Louisa reminded her not to do anything between 1 and 3 p.m. this morning.

"Okay girls, then let's get to work."

Lousia opens the door to the kitchen a little too enthusiastically with her key and everyone follows her limply. It's the same place with the same number of dirty dishes.

Washing the dishes yourself isn't that bad for you, it's the fact that this kitchen is so damn dark.

For some reason there are only 3 windows in the white, old room. The tiles on the floor are already old and a few edges have broken off, the potholes were noticeable on the sole of your slippers. It still smells like soup and detergent and you wonder who would want to spend hours doing something like that.

“Here” Hazel hands you gloves and an apron.

"Sorry I'm late" Ellie stands in the doorway, panting, looking for Lousia's gaze, but it still stays on you.

"Hey" she smiles at you… shyly?

You smile back and pull the apron over your head.

"Ellie… please don't let this happen again."

“I promise it won´t”

Hazel also hands her the things and Ellie doesn’t hesitate for a second. You're a little surprised that she showed up at all, but she seems a bit inergic to you.

"Okay, we'll divide into 3 groups and one will rinse while the other dries and puts thw dishes away," you almost order the others.

You grew up with a very tidy mother and a big sister, you know a lot about tidying up and organization. That's why no one hesitates and does what you said.

"I wanted to talk to you all day"

Ellie's rough voice loops into your right ear and you quickly grab the dishes and a sponge as a distraction and start to rinse.

"I'll rinse you dry"

Ellie seems surprised to have to pick up a plate but does as you say.

"Everything okay?"

What bothers you is how easy it is for her to read you.

“Yes, everything is perfect”

“It doesn’t seem like it?”

"That's your self Ellie?"

"Did anything happen?"

"No"

"Did I do something?"

"Ellie!"

You say her name a little loudly and Mia, who is standing across from you, turns to you briefly and smiles encouragingly at you.

No, that is completely wrong. You shouldn't be mad at Ellie, you should stand by her, she could be in distress or something.

You direct your gaze again, an embarrassing blush on your face.

As strange as it sounds, Ellie really looks beautiful in an apron. Her soft curves, her forearms that show off her fair, freckled skin and the black ink of her tattoo. She always has to pull up her sleeves no matter what she does.

"I just had a bad day okay?"

You take the next plate.

"Her name is Ruth"

Ruth. you imagine how the name would feel on your tongue, how it would taste. How it would taste on Ellie's tongue. Shaking, you banish the thought because the thought of a sentence where both Ellie’s tongue and taste appear, seems too dangerous to you.

"I didn't ask that"

"You didn't have to"

Nobody speaks for 10 minutes, there is complete silence. Your thoughts rush from one corner of your brain to the other. You didn't want to argue with her, you didn't want to be anything other than hers.

soon you realize that you have no right to be angry with Ellie. She can talk to whoever she wants. Strangely enough, it also seemed to make a certain amount of sense for Ellie that you were angry.

You Wonder why.

"I'm sorry," she murmurs next to you, a wet glass in her hand.

"You don't have to be, you didn't do anything, Ellie."

Your anger subsided, and your longing for Ellie's soft, warm voice grew.

"I haven't paid any attention to you all day."

"You don't have to-"

"But I want to. As often as I can."

Sometimes you think that she doesn't even notice what she's actually saying to you. That she's in a trance and doesn't even notice what's falling over her lips. How vulgar her allusions are, and how good they feel.

You turn around briefly, but no one seems to have heard.

"It's okay, don't worry about it now."

"I really am sorry though." Her hand rests gently on your back, but doesn't quite touch you. it is the gesture itself that counts here, but you can't help but think of her soft skin, of her many freckles that are certainly not only on her face.

"I know. Me too, I shouldn't have acted around like that"

her face shows how happy she was with the situation and you smiled too.

"I like your hair. It's really pretty braided" she whispers

her hands sadly turn back to the dishes and your gaze remains stuck to her for a while. But how could you not? who would ever want to look away from her?

"what did you want to tell me?" you ask her.

"how do you know that I want to tell you something?"

"you get really fidgety when you want to talk about something"

you notice so many things about her. how her leg fidgets slightly, how she keeps having to change her position and shifts her hips from left to right, how she bites her cheek, sometimes too hard.

"um... I had an idea"

"Ellie, no-"

"I haven't said anything yet"

the running water covers your voices, luckily, and no one notices.

"We're handing out these apples tomorrow and I thought to myself-"

you give her another glass and look into her soul.

"That's stupid and we're not 10 anymore, Ellie, what makes you think of something like that?"

Ellie takes the glass slowly and carefully, not breaking eye contact with you. Her eyes look hurt.

"Please explain it to me" you try to make your voice softer, more trustworthy.

"I don't want to be here. You don't understand, you're here every year and people love you. There's something wrong with me and I'm reminded of it every fucking day, I just want to show him what it's like to be treated like that"

you could hear the tears in her voice. You noticed early on with your brother that some people just don't cry, or at least don't like to. They express their tears differently, with Ellie it's her voice.

Her voice shows how she's feeling just as clearly as tears would have.

The kitchen is divided into two compartments. One is where they cook and the other is where they put the dirty dishes and clean them.

"How are we even supposed to get into the kitchen? And how do we know that they haven't already put the glaze on the apples? We don't know anything, Ellie-"

"Jesse's mother is volunteering to help in the kitchen. He said that he needs to help his mother to candy the apples this evening. But before that we can make a few changes."

Your mouth is slightly open. She has really thought this through. You hand Ellie another glass and stare at the door at the end of the room. No chance of her just getting in there. Louisa is a very nice manager but even that wouldn't gat an approve of her.

"How are we even supposed to get in there?"

CLINGGG

a high, loud noise bounces around in the air and you flinch so much that it hurts.

"fuck"

"oops" Ellie grins at you slightly after she has dropped the glass, you gave her to dry, on the floor.

"I'm so sorry, god I'm so clumsy"

Ellie gives you a whole scene, in which you don't have to do anything but hold back a laugh.

"Louisa, forgive me, it just fell out of my hand"

the other girls have to hold back a giggle too, even Hazel.

Ellie's high, dramatic voice sounded bad like a dying cat, but once again you were impressed by how daring she is.

"Yeah, yeah Ellie, clean that up. The broom is in the storage room"

Louisa presses the many keys into Ellie's hand and doesn't seem at all surprised.

"Thank you very much sister" for a moment you thought she was bowing.

„we’re not catholic Ellie-“

„But Mrs. I don't know where the storage rooms are"

„And I’m not married“ Louisa sighs

"Shit Ellie, I'm kinda enjoying this"

Kate grins at her and Ellie winks as Louisa gives Kate a warning look.

Ellie puts a strong, secure arm around you.

“Please accompany her”

Louisa waves her hands in the air between you two

“Sure” you reply like a robot

Ellie's arm pulls you towards the exit door and almost slams it behind you.

"first we ruin the glaze, then we can get the broom from wherever that was"

"in the storage room"

"whatever"

There are two doors to the kitchen. One that is in the washing up room and connects the two rooms and another that leads directly to the kitchen. The other entrance can be taken through the dining hall, and that's where you headed.

"if the pastor sees us, we're dead, Ellie"

you walk quickly but are still careful when you go around corners.

"I know, I think he wants to hang me on a scarecrow, I had a dream about that recently-"

you grab her arm and shove her back behind a safe corner.

"phillip"

"who the fuck is Phillip"

you press Ellie lightly against the wall because you are sure that sometimes she can't control her body properly. you peek around the corner slightly and see the orange hair.

"He's like the pastor's right-hand man, his best friend is also his roommate and his assistant."

"Pastors can have roommates?"

The orange spot at the end of the hallway slowly disappears like the light of a car on a dark night. This time you go first and Ellie follows you like a dog, she is also much quieter.

You feel 6 years younger and you like doing something you've never dared to do. Otherwise it was always the boys who played pranks and even though you never admitted it, you were always jealous.

Jealous of the freedom to behave like an asshole and not face any consequences. You wanted to have that laugh, that bond of having done something wrong together and to experience the big drama afterwards. To be praised for having done it.

"Shit, you like this, don't you?"

How can she read you so well?

"No!"

When you get to the door you stare at her knowingly.

"Yes you do, you're not as good as you always act doll. And I mean that in the best way possible"

"You're full of shit Ellie"

you let her pass you and the green eyed girl hastily tries to find the key.

"hey" you calmly touch her quick hands.

"calm down. don't stress Ellie"

her cheeks redden and her hands slow down.

"i really can't find it. fuck do you even have the key to the kitchen as a group leader?"

out of instinct you pull the door handle to use the key and the door opens.

"That was easier than i thought-"

Ellie puts the keys in her back pocket and carefully sticks her head into the kitchen. you keep watch so that no one walks by and tells on you. you quickly scurry after Ellie into the empty, warm room and smell the sweet air of the apples.

"the door has a fucking window" Ellie whispers in your ear and points at the door from where your friends are cleaning dirty dishes, the door that leads to Louisa who Is waiting for her keys.

goosebumps spread across your arms and legs and you are not sure if it is where Ellie is or the chance of being thrown out of the camp.

as you stand in front of the big pot you both breathe in out of reflex.

"It smells good, I even feel a little bad about ruining it"

Ellie watches the bubbling bubbles a little dreamily.

"Isn´t that actually vandalism?"

you ask thoughtfully.

Ellie almost laughs out loud and puts her hand over her mouth. You grab her arm and press even harder against her mouth so that she is really quiet.

"No, that isn't really vandalism oh my god you are innocent"

"Wow thanks Ellie, it was so enlightening"

you spend a while looking in the kitchen for something that might taste good and after a while Ellie finds vinegar that is probably decades old.

"that is so disgusting, remind me not to eat any of it"

Ellie's look confirms that somehow you'll have to eat it anyway.

"it will noticeable if we don't eat anything, just a small bite"

"Ellie what the fuck" you massage your temples with your thumb and watch her open the vinegar.

"not too much, okay?"

"yeah yeah"

In the end she used almost half the bottle to make it really gross. for an "extra reaction" she said. In the end you almost got caught by the pastor's right hand. In the end Ellie held your hand for exactly 4 seconds.

It was impressive how those 4 seconds stayed in your head for hours.

INTERACT WITH ONE OF THE LINKS UP THERE

Please post and repost a lot about Palestine especially right now. The videos shock me to my core and are really disturbing but people live these lives, these are children of someone. Please take your focus on the people in Palestine who are going thru hell. Help where you can

I really hope you liked this chapter, I will upload more after focusing more about palestine so it might take a while! Btw SO SORRY ITS THAT LONG

Taglist: @elliewilliamgfooc @bready101 @a-little-bit-of-everybody @vqxen @hersuniverse @nelzooo @shiimer @bellaramseysgirlfriend @sonthingwithl @vi0lentb3rry @elliewilliamsblunt @be3flow3r @adelaide013 @abbysbraids @mourningdovee

[thurio-edau]

SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS

first of all, I should explain what I am going to do. starting with Ashlyn, I'll analyze and/or theorize the group. because there is a lot of depth to all their characters and I've really been wanting to do this for some time. it will be a total of 5 posts instead of 6, because I will be analyzing Tyler and Taylor together due to obvious reasons. I will also cut them at the beginning because they might be long and also there will be triggers.

Part 1: Ashlyn Banner

I'm starting with Ashlyn right here as the protagonist and the leader of the series. Ashlyn's probably won't be very long since this is not a character analysis and instead, a mental characteristic analysis. even though her character is written so well that doesn't mean she has to be mentally sick, since she seems to be... well the most stable one -until the recent chapters-

what I'll be starting off with, will be autism. even though it's not confirmed fully in canon, Red herself said that she wrote Ashlyn with autism in mind so in this analysis I'll mostly go through with the symptoms she shows and how it explains her character.

her most obvious and constantly repeated symptom is her sensory issues. she is able to hear phantom noises and other things no one can hear due to her hypersensitive hearing.

from the beginning of the series, she has been repeatedly struggling with loud noises even though she wore earplugs or noise-cancellation headphones. Ashlyn herself said that she didn't want to make friends growing up, one of the reasons being her sensitive hearing allowing her to hear everything. you'd also probably be wary of things like it if you had her hearing; any gossip, talking behind backs, rumours etc. would not be pleasant to hear and you'd be aware of everyone's true side.

the group understands her problems with her hearing being too strong, and looks after her whenever there's anything loud. which was first seen at the arcade if I'm correct, Taylor asked her if she'd be alright and Aiden got punched in the face while he was worried about her.

or the time Taylor and Logan were shooting at the centipede phantom, due to the bullets making extremely loud sounds for her. or in the facility, when Logan told her to cover her ears to take down a phantom.

from the moment she was born, she had always been sensitive to any loud sounds. reminding here that autism is a neurodivergency, which means someone's brain is diverse than most other who we call neurotypicals. autism, ADHD, bipolar etc. are neurodivergencies that cannot be obtained later in life, and has always been at the person's brain.

I see myself in her frequently, I also wear earplugs constantly and my friends are aware of the sensory issues I have. her reactions to said sensory issues are written really realistic and correctly.

next, boundaries and distancing.

once again, since the beginning, Ashlyn has been distancing herself from everyone around her. this part will mostly include Aiden due to him not understanding boundaries and having passed Ashlyn's lots of times.

autistic people tend to avoid eye contact, physical touch -if the person is not very close to them- and also usually not very expressive. for the love of god, the first time we see her geniunely smile is halfway through the series, when they get the car keys. the group's reaction to her smile is hilarious, even.

after the events of that night, Aiden is trying to understand her boundaries. he's an affectionate/caring person inside, and wants to hug her but keeps it low by just holding her head.

here we learn he did, indeed, hug her when he kept her from falling and Ashlyn even allowed it when she realized how scared he was for her.

despite keeping her boundaries always high, she let it happen this time, learning how to open up to people. before this night she was always on guard

by time she starts to see them as her actual friends, like the found family they are. autistic people are similar to cats actually, like those stray cats that will claw you instantly if you look at their eyes for long or make sudden moves to pet them. the cat sniffs your hand first, you feed it for some time, then a slight touch. the cat gets used to you after your own efforts to get close to it. Ashlyn is a similar case, she had to almost die to get used to them and accept them.

next, special interests. this part is a bit short but I feel as if it still counts to be honest.

ever since her childhood, she's been very interested in dancing. losing track of time as she does, not being interested in any other things if it wasn't related to ballet, making it a very important part of herself. her love for dance/ballet made her not take any interest in anything else like her self-defense classes her parents tried to give, and they were really surprised once she asked them to do it this time.

like cmon she has a literal dance mat on her room

which basically wraps the main symptoms! I can't really think of any detail symptoms for now because it's midnight here but I'm thinking of updating them each time I get more ideas. for the next part, mental disorders.

personally, I must say that I don't think she suffers from any mental disorders or illnesses. she's not depressive, just closed off. you might ask anxiety but she herself had said she isn't shy or nervous, she herself just doesn't like to talk a lot which is fully valid. Ashlyn hasn't showed any problems in talking in front of audiences, she isn't paranoid -her hypersensitive hearing doesn't count since it's not paranoia; she knows what's in there because she hears- and seems to be mentally more stable than the rest of the group. I also don't think she has anger issues the way Ben and Tyler do, it's just that everything got on her nerves quickly before she got used to the team.

she doesn't mind being the leader of the group and definitely isn't scared, as seen as how she went up against Tyler when they first were in the phantom dimension.

Ashlyn is basically the autistic girl who doesn't like talking much and has high boundaries, but once she warms up to her friends she's willing to do anything for them as seen as the recent episodes in the facility. I'm almost fully sure that she is autistic, considering the signs she shows.

sorry if this was a bit boring! the next ones will definitely be more interesting because the rest of the characters have interesting backstories and oh boy some disorders, I just wanted to start with Ashlyn to see if I could do this the way it was in my mind. I'm sure the rest can be pretty good!

I'd like it if anyone else mentioned more stuff. next up will be Aiden, who has a plethora of characteristics and it's definitely going to be really interesting. thank you for reading so far but I won't be writing Aiden's now because hhhhhh i need some sleep

[ashyjingles]

What's your favorite trope in thiam fics? (Or in general?)

this ended up being something a lot longer than i meant to be and is less of a fav trope and more of an analysis of how i view them or whatever but like. here have it

theo learning how to cope with life outside of the dread doctors and being viewed as a monster for his actions (which,,, sorry theo ily and i will forever be a theo defender,,, but never an apologist bc wtf bro) and liam understanding him because of what he's done during his ied episodes and the repercussions

liam's reluctant to admit he feels that empathy for him at first because hey!! this guy kind of not only evil but also batshit fucking bonkers!! but he kinda realizes without empathy he loses an aspect of his humanity and when he accepts it he realizes theo was quite honestly just in an incredibly abusive situation and was just trying to survive and became a product of his enviornment (and considering one of the causes of ied is environmental factors i feel like it wouldn't be too far fetched to say liam understands that personally too)

and theos reluctant to admit that he. feels guilty for anything he did. because that means admitting that he did bad things. which when he tries to rationalize makes no sense because he has done bad things and has even enjoyed doing it because his brains a little fucked and he knows that because he's a monster. but being guilty means he's a failure to the dread doctors. and he's already rotten at the edges and the edges are starting to peel away to show a rotten core and that means he's a failure to the mccall pack because they're a bunch of saints (compared to him at least. and if not, well they're on a saints leash) and he's spent so long being anything but a failure because being a failure means being dead and he cannot shake that no matter how hard he tries until he realizes liam sometimes fails at keeping his anger in check but that doesn't make him a failure. and then without even realizing liam starts teaching theo that it's okay to slip up a few times because that's what makes people human and maybe theo doesn't have to be a monster

but when they both accept themselves and the other it leads to a relationship that no one else quite gets (sure, mason has been there for liam his entire life and i cannot stress how much i adore their friendship but sometimes understanding something because you've watched it happen is worlds away from actually experiencing it) at first but it's the sort of thing that just. fits. because they can both push each other to their limits without actually going over (eventually) but also pull each other back when they need a reminder of who they are (people. not monsters.)

tbh i love them cause there's so many different dynamics and tropes that can apply to them but this one,,,,,,,, this one is the one that well and truly wrecks me most of the time. and i don't even think this counts as a trope.

if i had to choose like a trope trope then. idiots to lovers? basic. enemies to lovers? too obvious. idk any tropes now that i think about it,, fuck. sunshine x grumpy?? but also i think i like grumpy liam more than sunshine liam because that boy has an ied and a shitload of trauma he's not gonna be a ray of happiness all the time and like hell will theo be a sunshine character. OHHHH YOU KNOW WHAT?? FAKE DATING!! or the and they were roommates thing. idk tbh dude. hanahaki if u wanna take a peek at my 4 hanahaki drafts for them lmfao

in general tho? combination of idiots to lovers but also fake dating but also grumpy x grumpy that sometimes leans toward grumpy x sunshine I GUESS. since you're MAKING me CHOOSE.

[shu-box-puns]

Hello there mate!

Hope you're doing good and I'm here to say I ADORE you're Dad!Tsu'tey works and they bring me my daily dose of serotonin.

But also, since I've read (and reread) the "Grumpy dad and his feral son" work I've been having some thoughts. Like, what if Tsu'Tey was just a second too late and they managed to take Spider away? How would he react (I mean obviously he would hunt the shit out of them down) ? When would he and Spider reunite again? In the forest while he was with the recoms? In the battle of the Sea Dragon? I mean he would most def come to his rescue if the letter is the case to come and get him (+ to aid the Sullies), but then I also wonder what would happen. Would the whole Neytiri holding him hostige infront of Quaritch so he would release Kiri thing happen? How would he react to that? Or what if he got shot instead on Neteyam (not dying tho cos I want both my faves to live a happy life) ? I bet Tsu'Tey would be fucking terrified cos it woul remind him of how he got shot and almost died.

Anywho I'm sorry for the long line of questions and suggestions I left but when my brain finds something to hyperfixate on it will not stop coming up with questions and possible scenarios for the said thing 😅

I love the way your brain thinks Anon. (The fact I literally had most of these scenarios either thought out or planned :D) This got long. All the questions just gave me so many ideas and I RAN with it. Enjoy the memes and I hope there's no obvious spelling mistakes.

>_<

If Tsu'tey were too late to grab Spider before Quaritch got to him:

I could definitely see him tearing off after the recoms. Maybe he springs from the bushes too late, and Quaritch has already hoisted the boy up over his shoulder. Naturally, Tsu'tey still tries to attack him with his bow, but Lyle opens fire too fast and he old instinct has him retreating. Man definitely has some PTSD from getting shot during the war, and although mentally he still wants Spider back, his body goes on auto-pilot and throws him out of the line of fire. Lyle keeps shooting in his direction as the recoms retreat, but Tsu'tey isn't gonna let something as silly as instinct keep him down for long.

That's his boy, they'll have to kill him to keep him from getting him back. Thankfully, Jake knows exactly where his brain went and literally had to throw himself at this man so he didn't end up getting himself shot (again). Jake likes Spider well enough, but he thinks regrouping is a better course of action than charging in guns blazing - shocker, he's actually matured since having his kids.

Tsu'tey definitely fights with all he has against Jake, cursing at him and trying to wrestle himself free. He can't focus on anything but the distant roar of the enemy ship as it soars in close to the canopy. He can see the lights, and through the trees, the vague outlines of the recoms strapping themselves in. Lo'ak definitely has to wrestle the hunter's knife out of its sheath before he remembers it is there. But no one can save Jake from Tsu'tey biting the shit out of him. Man does not give a shit at this point.

When he gets free. (Of course it's a when not an if.) The airship is already long gone. A distant hum in the distance, even to his superior hearing. The pure, unbridled rage on this man's face is terrifying. Instead of explosive, loud anger, he's cold, almost unnervingly calm. A whole new level of terrifying.

Jake is definitely too scared to try and coax him out of the clearing and instead focuses on reassuring his children. Neytiri has to approach him, she's known him the longest afterall. Had stuck with him through the loss of Sylwanin, the fall of HomeTree, the war, she knows how best to handle him when he is like this. That doesn't mean her words are effective however. Tsu'tey needs a moment of stillness to collect his thoughts and recollect himself after the adrenaline burst, but Neytiri is already grabbing him roughly by the bicep and trying and drag him to his ikran.

He's still seething. Barely seeing straight. Half baked plans of him attacking the demon airship before it could get to Bridgehead were sounding more tempting by the moment.

Somehow Neytiri drags him out of the clearing and into the branches of the trees. Hauling his weary body to safer ground. But in his musing, Tsu'tey recalls the figure of Neytiri in the trees when Spider fell. He remembers seeing her dragging Kiri away with half a nod of acknowledgement sent Tsu'tey's way. It sends a fresh wave of rage crashing over him.

"You left him." He suddenly snarled, ripping his arm from her and pointing an accusatory finger at her. "He was right there, and you abandoned him!"

Neytiri's ears droop and she doesn't deny it. She doesn't back down either. "My priority was Kiri. I assumed you could handle it." She doesn't apologise for her actions or inaction. Just holds his gaze and holds her ground. Her expression neutral.

Tsu'tey knew she'd never taken much of a liking to Spider, despite her relationship with Jake and his heritage. Despite Tsu'tey unofficial adoption of the boy. There had always been a sense of hostility between the two. With Neytiri acting colder to Spider and the boy refusing to call her out on it. Tsu'tey had never thought to address it or try and help them mend that gap, now look at them.

And that's the real kick to the teeth. Not that Neytiri didn't care enough to be sorry that it was his kid taken instead of her own. It was the truth in her words that had his anger faltering. He should've been able to handle it. Spider was his son. And he let him slip through his fingers. He should've fought harder, dirtier. Should have resorted to teeth and nails if he had to.

So what if he got shot? If he'd angled it right, he would've had enough time to get Spider to safety.

If it had been Neteyam or Lo'ak in Quartich's hold, Jake would've torn himself apart to ensure their safety. Neytiri would've fallen into a blind rage to keep her children safe. Would have used every resource at her disposal to protect her own. She would have stared death in the face and kept snarling. And what had Tsu'tey done? Allowed a past experience to still his movements. To make him hesitate, and now he might have to pay the price for the rest of his life.

His retort dies on his tongue as his heart clenches painfully. But Tsu'tey had never been one to give up easily. He kept a tight hold on his anger, allowed it to guide him as he shoved past Neytiri and called for his ikran. His face was set in his trademark scowl, but there was a predatory fluidity to him that only came out during the war. When what he loved was threatened.

As his ikran lands beside him and he makes the bond, Lo'ak sidles up to his side, offering him back his knife. There is a familiar fire burning in the depths of the boy's eyes. A desire for vengance, and a sea of guilt and pain. Tsu'tey allows his face to soften for a heartbeat, he bends over the side of his ikran and squeezes Lo'ak's shoulder tight. "I will get him back." He promises.

Lo'ak chews on his lower lip, his eyes flickering to Tsu'tey and holding his burning gaze. He must see Tsu'tey's determination, his drive, his stubbornness, because he cracks a small smile and nods.

The family prepares to return to High Camp. Jake warning Tsu'tey that any attempts to go after Spider now was a suicide mission. He didn't argue, but neither did Tsu'tey agree. He also chose to ignore Neytiri handing Tuk off to him. Just kept his gaze ahead, and his hand loosely wrapped around the little girl's stomach so she was secure in the saddle in front of him.

If they reunited in the forest:

Lets say by chance Tsu'tey gets word of the Demon ship in clan territory again, or he's just riding around the forest on a pa'li because it helps him clear his mind.

He hasn't slept since Spider was taken. He's worried for his boy and severely regretting not letting him know what he meant to him before this shit show got so out of hand. In typical Tsu'tey fashion, he's been spending his time gathering Spider's belongings for when he returns.

Norm had already handed over most of the boy’s prized possessions when Tsu’tey asked for them from his bedroom in the compound. He’d packed everything away neatly in preparation to wherever Jake was planning to flee, so his son would have what he needed the minute he was retrieved. Spare exo pack, rechargeable batteries, etc. 

He's in his head so deep, that he takes a double take when he spots Spider through the trees. His pa'li makes an abrupt stop, the large animal mirroring Tsu'tey's shock as he stares wide eyed at the image of his boy stood on a log, above a group of recoms. Even from a distance he can see the bruises. He can see the tense set of his shoulders, his swift glances to the forest, despite pretending to be at ease.

Tsu'tey's shock melts into a scowl as his bow groans under the tightening on his hands. He steels himself with a long, deep inhale, mentally calculating the space within the small clearing. The sight of the guns on the recoms have his heart pounding, and his scars tingling with phantom pain. He knows deep down that his bow will be useless in a one on six fight. His only advantage is surprise, and he only gets one chance.

Tsu'tey's mind is made up before he takes his next breath. He knows he needs to try. Even if it ends with a bullet between his shoulders and his pa'li throwing him off from the pain, he needs to die trying. Whether it kills him or not, he needs to return Spider to the clan, where he will be safe. Where Jake and Neytiri can take him to a fresh start, a safer alternative to the clan at war.

The recoms are distracted. Only one wearing sunglasses is actually taking stock of his surroundings. Spider is talking, commanding most of the group's attention.

Sucking in a deep breath, Tsu'tey lets out a sharp call that could easily be mistaken for some distant herd animal. None of the recoms react but he sees Spider visibly stiffens. Tsu’tey grins despite himself and readies his mount. 

He notches an arrow into his bow and urges his pa'li forward. He erupts from the undergrowth with a war cry, and skewers the closest unsuspecting recom. It scatters the group like startled yerik, who immediately scramble for their guns.

"TSU'TEY!" Spider yells, sounding shocked and elated to see him. The hunter spares only a moment killing a second recom before he's charging for that log. His pa'li races past faster than the enemy can load their weapons, and it gives Tsu'tey large enough of an opening to lean down and grab Spider's by his extended hands. The child immediately latches onto him, grabbing whatever he can as Tsu'tey swings him up into the saddle in front of him and together they disappear off into the undergrowth.

Shots were fired at their back but no one got hit, much to Tsu'tey's relief. But the adrenaline rush isn't over because Spider turns around and yells in a rush about a tracker in his mask.

Not to worry though, because Tsu'tey is very up to date on all the old compound location. Even as his triumph sours, he takes confidence in the distant yells of the recoms and the light pressure of Spider at his front. He snarls softly to himself as he makes his pa'li change course.

Yes they get the masks switched out without issue and toss the bugged one into a fast moving river to send Quaritch on a wild goose chase and buy the Sully's more time to run.

Side note: In this possibility, Tsu'tey was definitely convinced Spider wasn't safe enough with him and he had to go with the Sully's to the Metkayina clan. And Tsu'tey was NOT planning to go with him. HAVE ANGST!!

If they reunited on the Sea Dragon:

In this scenario, Tsu'tey ends up visiting the Sullys when the Sea Dragon turns up. He just wanted to check up on his friends and see if they've heard anything about Spider, and the next thing he knows, he's got nieces and nephews to save, and a score to settle.

Tsu'tey is definitely going straight for the ship.

It's during the stand-off where the Colonel has his gun to Lo'ak's temple and Jake isn't telling anyone over the comms what is happening - preparing to hand himself over like the idiot he is. Tsu'tey was circling above the clouds on his ikran with Neytiri, carefully listening to his ear piece as he tries to decipher what is going on. The minute he catches sight of Spider being escorted back into the ship, all rational thought leaves this man's head. Of course he has enough sense to remain undetected - he's not stupid - but he's also not on board with Jake's self-sacrificing bullshit. In Tsu'tey's books, failure is not an option this time around. He is getting Spider back if it kills him.

Tsu'tey and Payakan being on the same wavelength.

The tulkun YEETING himself onto the ship's deck and giving Tsu'tey big enough of an opening to land his ikran and send the beast back up into the sky undetected. He makes brief eye contact with Neteyam who's circling the shallows around the belly of the ship, getting ready to leap up and help out his siblings.

The oldest Sully boy points to the kids tied to the railing, Tsu'tey nods. He motions behind him, where the RDA sailors took Spider and Neteyam nods his understanding.

On the horizon, the Metkayina clan are inbound. Tearing through the waves and heading straight for the ship.

Tsu'tey decides that they've got this covered and finds the nearest doorway that will lead him into the belly of the metal ship. He's too tall for the corridors and either has to knuckle crawl or walk at a constant stoop. His bow is a pain to hold loaded in the tight space, so he opts solely for his knife.

He navigates the ship blindly. His ears pricked for Spider's voice, but otherwise killing anyone he comes across and moving swiftly. He knows the destruction caused by Payakan would've damaged something valuable and he needs to move fast.

I love the idea of Tsu'tey stumbling across the control room in time to find Spider steering the ship towards the rocks and then brutally killing the controls with a fire extinguisher. (Boy was eyeing that lever heavily whenever he was in the same room as it). Just Tsu'tey letting out a half formed growl as the crewmates try to tear Spider away and fix the lever, but his oncoming attack getting put on hold as the enormous ship speeds for the rocks and promptly takes off.

The minute that bitch lands back in the water, you can bet Tsu'tey is the first on his feet. He erupts into the room with a sound so unnerving that the crew forget that they are armed. It's an unfair fight. And despite the tight quarters and being outnumbered, Tsu'tey wipes the floor with everyone.

They find Spider an exopack and get the fuck off the sinking ship to meet back up with the Sullys out on the rock.

Just the crew out cold or dead at his feet, and Tsu'tey closing the distance between himself and Spider. He drops into a crouch, all hard scowl and sharp eyes, and gently tucks Spider's dread behind his ear. "Are you unharmed?"

Spider nods, dumbfounded and thrown off by the raw concern in Tsu'tey's voice. Tsu'tey grumbles. He can see spots of blood all over Spider, small grazes and nicks that shouldn't be there. His stripes are faded and his hair needs a retwist. But he's alive, and Tsu'tey isn't going to let anything else happen to him.

Bonus:

The standoff:

I feel like throwing Tsu'tey into the mix would throw so many scenes off course with his sheer presence that the stand off between Neytiri and Quaritch where they're holding the kids hostage wouldn't happen. There would be too many variables changing for it to occur the same way, but lets pretend it does.

(Neteyam is alive btw, just resting on his rock with Tsireya kindly mixing him up a poultice she learned from her Tsahik training. Lyle didn't kill him, but Neteyam definitely had to protect Lo'ak's dumbass in some way. That child is accident prone.)

Anyway, we've got Quaritch holding Kiri hostage. Jake is trying to keep Tuk out of harm's way. No one knows where the fuck Lo'ak is, but he's slippery enough to get himself out of anything. And then we've got Neytiri making a last ditch effort to protect her daughter by threatening to take away the last thing Quaritch loves; Spider.

In the background, we've got Tsu'tey. Breathing hard, slightly wounded from throwing himself around on a ship with broken equipment and guns getting fired at him from all directions.

Raised voices draw his attention. He's standing on the walkway overlooking the deck where the standoff is occurring. He spots Spider first, under Neytiri's blade, begging for Kiri's life instead of his own. Anger like he's never felt before curls hard in his stomach. The betrayal is worse than when Jake and Neytiri first mated. It was one thing to let his son get captured, it was another to murder him right in front of Tsu'tey.

Kiri's voice stops Tsu'tey from doing anything stupid in his blind rage. Every molecule of his body screams to defend his child, but common sense makes him take in the situation.

His head snaps to Quaritch holding Kiri hostage. To Jake within arms reach, but preoccupied with Tuk. To the knife drawing blood at Kiri's neck.

Tsu'tey also takes note of the clear shot he has from his vantage point. There is no conflict within him as he notches his bow. No concern for Spider's reaction, or the conflicted feelings he might have towards his birth father. Tsu'tey's mind is clear. His hands are steady. And his mind is made up.

He takes the shot, and nail's the recom through his right eye. The arrow - fired with all the strength he could muster - goes straight through bone and wedges in up to two thirds of its shaft.

Quaritch sways for a heartbeat, his knife clattering to the metal deck as Kiri tears away from him and throws herself at Jake. Then he collapses with a painful thump. Limps sprawling and his head lolling.

Slowly, Tsu'tey lowers his bow, his gaze narrowed and his tail whipping behind him. He catches Neytiri's eyes as the huntress and her family follow the direction the arrow had come from.

"Unhand. My. Son." Tsu'tey snarls, his voice ringing out over the soft crash of the waves and the pop of fire. His gaze is venomous, fingers twitching for another arrow if Neytiri doesn't back down. There's still a crazed edge to her gaze, a look Tsu'tey is sure he shares. He hasn't felt this shaken since Spider was taken.

Neytiri nods once. An acknowledgment. And lets Spider go.

His son stumbles away, furiously scrambling to put distance between himself and Neytiri. Kiri was quick to soothe him, check him for injuries as Jake carefully approached Neytiri to take the knife off of her.

Tsu'tey leaps down from the upper level. He can't be bothered to find the stairs and the height is nothing compared to what he has to deal with back in the forest. He keeps an eye on Neytiri, but knows that Jake has her now. Ears pricked in case of further enemies, Tsu'tey spares a few moments to kick Quaritch's corpse and make sure he fired a killing shot. The last thing he needed was to grow comfortable again and then in fifteen years have to deal with this bullshit all over again.

"Dad?" The quiet utterance has panic straightening his spine. It's not one of his nieces asking for Jake's attention. It's Spider's voice. Quiet and shaky and so vulnerable that Tsu'tey just wants to wrap himself up in his arms.

Instead, all he can think about is Quaritch's body at his feet. Tsu'tey's arrow protruding from his eye socket. His blood pooling at his feet.

Then it hits him all at once. Spider's birth dad is dead at his feet, and Tsu'tey put him there. Tsu'tey killed him. He didn't even ask. Spider spent months with this man - against his will - but not everything is black and white. They might have come to some understanding. He might of grown to know him outside of his video logs and the fleeting stories he overheard from the Omaticaya. Spider may have gotten to know Quaritch without the biased lense of hate everyone else talks about him with. And Tsu'tey murdered him. What's worse, he felt triumphant doing it.

Tsu'tey can feel his hands shaking, regardless of how tightly he grasped his bow. His ears were flat against his skull, his tail tucked in close to his legs. He prays he just looks like he's reflecting, in contrast to being crushed by the weight of his actions. And he keeps staring at Quaritch's corpse. The arrow. The blood.

"Dad?" Spider says again. A little louder. More confident. And it kills Tsu'tey as he cringes, eyes squeezing shut against the guilt.

A brush of a hand to his wrist. His eyes snap open, and there's Spider. Gazing up at him with wide, tearful eyes. His mask is slightly cracked and he's bleeding from his chest where Neytiri caught him with her blade. But there is no hatred in his expression. Only relief and exhaustion.

"Dad, are you okay?" Spider asks him, and he looks at Tsu'tey as he says it.

The realisation hits him like a sturmbeest stampede. That Spider was calling him Dad, not the corpse at his feet.

With a deep, shuddering breath, Tsu'tey pulls himself together. "I am." He reassures his son as he drops into a crouch. It is evident from Spider's expression that he doesn't believe him, but the boy doesn't push.

Instead, he throws his arms around Tsu'tey's neck and burries his face under his chin. Tsu'tey chuckles wetly, his arms wrapping around Spider and dragging him close. It soothes every raw instinct in him to finally have his boy back in his arms. Tired and injured, but safe.

Around him, he can hear the Sully family beginning to wade into the surf, so Tsu'tey tucks his arms under Spider's thighs and hoists him up onto his hip, like he used to when his son was still a toddler. Despite his age now, he's still the perfect size for Tsu'tey to carry unhindered out of the shipwreck.

BONUS:

[tamelee]

Just a little rant about HOW MUCH I FUCKING HATE NARUTO FANBOYS OH MY GAAWWWDDDD besides the obvious reasons (homophobia, misogyny, incels) they worship the shit outta the worse characters ever like Shikamaru and Itachi and Hinata. Like I just saw on the Naruto Reddit (my fault, I know, but I searched something up about Naruto and the first link discussing that was Reddit) and they all used that stupid dumbass filler where Shikamaru was asking his dad about Naruto and why everyone hates him and how he doesn't hate him (even tho in CANON he did 😤) and they all said not only is he a better friend to Naruto than Sasuke ever was but (here we go again) Sasuke's more of a brother 🙄 and they also said Sasuke treated Naruto like trash and was the worst friend 🤦🏻‍♀️ like it's so insane to me the dudebros lack of brain and reading comprehension. Like how do you as a grown ass man not know the difference between what's actually real and what's not about what you're watching? Or maybe it's that they just hate Sasuke so much and how much Naruto loves him and keeps talking about him and how he's his best friend in canon (he said it way too much for me to believe that even these ugly incels couldn't understand) that they'd rather give the credit to someone else that isn't a threat and doesn't make Naruto act borderline homosexual. Oh and they obviously ignore Shikamaru's blatant misogyny and still consider him the best thing ever because why would they care 🙄 anyway end rant, sorry. I just hate this fandom 😭 I stay on my side of things mostly (well, other than this one time. But when I do I just rant about it to someone and move on)

Ah yeah it’s frustrating isn’t it? 

I think it’s obvious if you’ve read the Manga. I wonder if they’ve only seen the Anime and just don’t bother checking what is canon first. So much is changed from Kishimoto’s original. (Has anyone seen that twt discussion on filler? I’d love to read your opinions on it.) 

I mean, Hinata’s supposed backstory with Naruto is just ridiculous, but I don’t understand why people think Naruto was friends with any of them? Even if it’s shown in filler that Naruto was around them or they asked their parents about Naruto... what makes fans say they were friends? 

Sasuke was the only one who acknowledged Naruto with a smile and they weren't even friends until much later.

Right before the exams, Shikamaru tells team 7 not to die. Not because he’s worried for them, but because he believes they’re not capable, largely because of his lack of faith in Naruto. While Naruto calls them idiots and insults both Shikamaru and Hinata as he introduces them to the reader. 

'A big mouth idiot' and a 'weirdo' (I believe he actually also called her creepy but I can't find the translation, but remember when Kushina told Naruto not to go for a weird girl? She used the same words xD) And then Shikamaru immediately wanted to target Naruto in the forest of death.

Had either of them at any point been friendly to Naruto or whatever, then we would’ve known here and Naruto wouldn’t have insulted them like he did (as is his right) because he craved a connection more than anything. It’s ridiculous how the Anime at times just blatantly ignores the lonely misery Naruto had to grow up in (ALONE) in favor of these other characters. As if sugarcoating that would make any of them look less bad. And don't get me started on Hinata during that written test because it's no wonder Naruto got so confused and didn't trust her "kindness".

Regardless, I think a lot of Naruto-fans who tend to glorify any of these friendships and extending it for what it is largely do so because they side with a narrative regarding the system and don't get why Sasuke (and others) challenged it in the first place. Brushing it off like it was some evil, selfish thing. I personally like Shikamaru's development and who he is as a character in the end because him showing change might've been very helpful in actually changing the system had they worked towards that. But you know... we'll never know.

[doukeshi-kun]

a promise is a promise

daddy's home 😘

🌃-anon here ^^ hooray!!

okay okay phew it's been so long i forgot how to write anon ask but, a comeback is desperately needed to save the day. I'm here to talk about professor!nikolai agenda. your girl started uni and i need to cope.

while collegestudent!nikolai has been eating my brain like crazy, professor!nikolai is as needed. i might hit you up with college student nikolai someday tho cuz my classmates are all weird and i need that daily dose of delusion that someday, i'll meet a student as awesome and as fun as nikolai is in my head

little disclaimer to anyone reading this: dark content ahead. we dont do any of that irl it's just fiction, so if you're sensitive to prof x student shit keep scrolling. i say reader is 20-ish and papi nikolai is pushing 30 😁

random prof!nikolai headcanons ahead 🗣️

prof kolya is definitely one of the cool teachers on campus yk? the type that's loved by all of the students because of how laid back he is and how much he doesn't give a shit yk??? like "prof we didn't study for the test tomorrow can we postpone it?" "we will. i havent put the text either" 💀 that type you know?

BUT simultaneously, he can also be really strict depending on the context yk? while he's chill, he can't tolerate disrespect like, not at all. he jokes around with his students but with limits and boundaries.

clothes-wise i feel like he dresses super well 🤔 as opposed to headcanons I've seen, i dont think he dresses weird or in an eccentric way like canon nikolai is, he wears casual clothes :3 fashionable? yes. but nothing weird. he's tall, broad with really unique features (i imagine nikolai with one of them typical european noses and plump looking lips. this part is totally up to you tho)

prof kolya was a really unproblematic physics professor (yk in canon he has teleportation abilities so uh) that is until y/n took a course with him,

we're met with two cases: y/n is calm and quiet in class, y/n puts herself out there. now let's be for real, teachers love good students so the higher the grades the better the sex more you'll get attention from him (god imagine nikolai praising you😮‍💨)

now if you're quiet- OMG since he gets along well with students i feel like he'll openly joke around with students except for you (if you're quiet) he'll just talk with you in a low voice (btw i imagine classes like, small classes not amphitheaters or any of that) let me elaborate: you're in class yk he's explaining quantum physics or some shit and occasionally interacting with his students. his gaze falls on you once he's standing right in front of your desk and lets a small question slide like "is it ok?" "do you get it?" or flashing you a small smile or so 🤭 he's not mocking you or anything he's being genuine (for once) bc you're openly his favorite

and by that, and as someone who's a favorite for nearly all my professors so far the privileges i get isnt anything like grades or whatever but more like validation? im a good student i dont need their crusty dusty extra credits. one of the privileges i get is for example, during exams, the prof tells me "so, [name], we're scoring an A+ in this test too?" yk and it's genuine so nikolai i that type too.

(i leave anything sexual or suggestive for you to develop bc im really bad and awkward at that)

conclusion: he shamelessly favorites you in front of other students.

though you two would become a thing faster if reader is on the more loud type in his class: always participating, asking questions, joking around maybe.... i feel like when you have a question thats a little long to explain, he'd ask u to come to his office and what happens there is up to your imagination dear bean

will quickly become your number one emotional support throughout college 🥱 imagine not doing well in the exam and you go to his office to talk to him about it and he comforts you by [redacted]

anyways i could go on and ramble forever. i'd love to hear your dirty thoughts on this nikolai au :3 what i wrote is hella long and messy but we're mere disciples beanie, you're the writer here hehe

as usual, have a good/day night!!

I REALLY LOVE YOU SO MUCH *sloppily kissing slop slop*

first of all, yeeee goodluck with college and don't die bcs i almost did 😎👉 and secondly, no let's NOT get nikolai pushing 30s. HE IS 35 ATLEAST IDC HAHAHA im gonna reply to each one headcanon bcs you deserve it girlie 💋✨

yes! he totally gives me the vibe to be laid-back at his work. he's so gonna do something like that lmao. also, despite his laid-back persona and he's always like “ehh~ just answer this easy ass quiz and i'll take it as your assignment mark”, i do think he does his job greatly. there's a time where he needs to get things done and while it doesn't seem like he's doing shit, he actually GETS. SHIT. DONE. that's why he isn't fucking fired 💀

strict prof. nikolai.... ugh *spreads legs*😝 i agree. he does have limit and i feel like he wouldn't scold people or raise his voice but certainly when he's being colder and quieter, oooh you fucked up big time

i do think he wears classic style to go to classes! i'm thinking... dark academia. and yes, he's tall and broad and so big✨ i feel like it also depends on the subject. if prof nikolai is teaching theatre or drama... those kind of things, he will wear something maximalist, if that makes sense? imagine a mad hatter-themed suit but formal. unfortunately, i can't draw for life.

physics professor hmmmm why don't he come here and expand the space of my quantum pussy😏😏

i can imagine raaaaaaa :barkbarkbark: him praising you in front of the whole class because you got quite high marks for physics ahakss😝

HMMMMMMM SOFTY :feral: i can't fucking breathe😩 yes he'd totally be loud to those who are loud with him but if you're quiet and serene, he'll be soft as fuck rrrrrrrrr imagine him noticing you not understanding something and he takes the initiative to come to your desk, teach you with the softest (yet deep) voice ever. NOT MOCKING ME TOO? woah what a green flag 💚

lmfao i can totally relate with you😭 honestly, validation is too pressuring, stressing and overwhelming for me. i hate when teachers are like “so, elie, you can score A for this right?” bih i just barely got the B-grade fym (burnt-out gifted kid be like;). anyway, i'm half-half on this. but i do think if he makes such comments, and he notices you aren't uncomfortable, he wouldn't go put his way to directly say that. maybe he just makes comment that implies he does have certain expectations on you

(i'll develop the sexual things myself *takes off his pants and develop his wood*)

conclusion: he becomes my favourite subject😝❤️

i'm honestly thinking that he prefers it if you are an active student. idk, for me, nikolai (in general) likes challenges and fun. so if you're actively questioning this or that, he'd take interest in you really quick. also, i will invite myself into his office tyvm

definitely get emotional. lmao imagine ranting about other professors with him and he just supports you

well my dirty thought is that he becomes my private tutor. HA HOW BOUT THAT HUHHH but in all honesty, i love the thought of him riling and teasing you instead of yk, playing favourite and get you alone in his office. he likes edging people and he'd surely likes it if you tease him back too ayy papi😝

[navsink]

to be gentle is a choice. | sukuna x sorcerer reader !

A/N: so brainfart moment!! im sure someone else will make this way better than i can but just for now hold on w me on this spontaneous moment of what ifs. im willing to challenge myself by making me write everything from sukuna's pov, yay me, nay brain! it's not gonna be cannon compliant tho, im shit at remembering lore.

tags: angst, lying, swearing, slightly suggestive, sukuna is a red flag by itself, guillible reader, sukuna pov, sukuna is bad at feelings, possesive behavior (?), unreliable narrator, tba.

wc: 536 words 2,882 characters

--

April 5th, 2016

How long has it been? Around ten-ish months since I've met her, that's a long time. A dragged out and long time since I have been lying to her. Since when do I care about lying? The thousand year old king of curses, turning into a mushy and limp sugar cube for some woman. It's not any woman in my defense, but it's still so annoying. Ever since we met I can't believe how easily I feel myself start to hover over her like some protective canine.

The longer I'm with her the more I dig myself deeper, a side of me is regretful, yet the other is enjoying it in the most deceitful way possible. It's no surprise to anyone that I'm so selfish, especially when it comes to her. Are these feelings normal?

I feel like I want to strangle her everytime she pouts, when she turns over her shoulder and the corners of her mouth drag out to form that chesire smilel that lures me into those glistening eyes.

How is it that the thing I hated the most- sorcerers, has me reconsidering my whole gig of taking over the world and killing sorcerers yada yada.

i think i might... love her

Humans are fragile beings, especially with how easily I can just press them against my index and thumb like a pesky diminute ant. If you ask me personally what humans mean to me, I'll answer honestly.

I hate them. Whiny. Powerless. Weak. Narsiscistic. and overall pesky little shits.

but.

if she were to ask me. God. I'd fold over and have my hand reach to her cheek, caressing it in the most gentle way possible, afraid of the fragility and ephemeral nature of the human species she's sadly a part of. I would've begrudgingly answered "Humans are complex to even have a general opinion on, but if I were to generalize them, I think they're evanescent and self servient. Yet you, transcend my definition, because to me, you're the most kind, precious of incalculable worth, piece of being to ever exist."

To which you of course, had to ask in one of the most vulnerable moments of mine. Giggling and peppering gentle kisses across my forehead like some weakling, not taking anything I say seriously per tradition. You're definitely not the obedient type, Uraume was horrorstruck when I mentioned every incident of tardiness, teasing, disrespectful banter and so on.

God that Uraume, she doesn't get you like I do, it makes me kind of euphoricly selfish. to be the only one who can understand you like this, the one who gets to hear you rant about the measly curses you're facing at the tech, or even hearing you heave my name when you're dry humping my lap.

tell me, my dear and lovely "girlfriend", would you also speak about me like this when I'm not around? would you love me still be here if you knew? even if im your biggest enemy? a menace to your kind? would all your friends try to seal me if they knew?

would you love me all the same when I'm the most cursed yet the most blessed when I'm with you?

...

Pg. 1 of Sukuna's Diary.

---

Shall we continue this as a series?

[johnslittlespoon]

also little (ok not so little. at all) personal thing as a way of mass–apologizing in advance to friends/moots for being slow with replies/not super interactive for a bit (possibly? always hard to predict) but pls god feel free to ignore this <3

i hate talking ab not–fun personal stuff on here (if it's not hidden deep in tags LOL), but i feel so so guilty for being so slow at replying to messages here/on discord and i would never want any friends to feel ignored or like i'm not enthusiastic to chat bc i genuinely have the most fun yapping together in the wota server and it's been such a joy making more friends here and getting closer with some ppl 🥺 it's just eating me up even tho ik i don't have to apologize/explain myself and i'd never hold it against someone else if the roles were flipped!! it's just to put my mind at ease so i can feel less guilt/pressure :')) and i am Uncomfortable talking about bleh emotions so it's easier to just plop it here and not have to explain myself one on one lmaoo tbf i may delete this in a few hrs bc just typing this up might give my brain some relief anyway and then i won't feel like this is necessary!

but sam lore the quick of it is i have # bipolar and i've been in an originally manic, then hypomanic episode essentially since around the time i started this account? it's the longest 'up' episode i've had but it's also the first one i've been off bp meds for so that might be why (long story dw i see my dr monthly <3 sorting life out rn) and i think starting stimulants back in may prolonged it a bit bc yk. meth LMAO but it finally petered off a few weeks ago and now i am entering the Big D (and not the fun kind) so some days i just do not have any energy for anything other than survival mode and when i'm suddenly super chatty or active, 99% of the time it's bc i just took my adhd meds and downed an iced coffee lmaoo genuinely so grateful i have those meds to keep me from fully sinking deep into a bad episode for now at least. so tldr; not trying to be antisocial or ignore anyone, just tryina truck thru :-)

i'm so thankful for all the cool ass friends i've met thru mota and i have been rly scared since i felt myself swinging to the other side of the bp spectrum last month bc i've been very up since i joined tumblr and i don't want a sudden change in vibes to be taken personally or for it to seem like i've lost interest in fandom!! i also get scared i'll just be dull and boring to friends now who have only known me while i'm manic which is understandable bc it's a big switch up but i think over text it shouldn't be as jarring bc yk i have time to think ab my words more and all. i am a little surprised actually that if anything, my motivation for writing has only intensified in the past month, but i think it's the first time i've had a healthy form of escapism in an episode and my brain has definitely latched onto it to get me thru that and a lot of shit stuff that's been happening irl this summer, so i'm unbelievably thankful that this fandom dragged me back into fic writing as hard as it did <3

but as sometimes happens with depression as i'm sure most of us have experienced, motivation/energy loss can hit even our biggest passions and i'm Terrified and hoping so very hard that it doesn't, but if fic updates do abruptly slow down as i ride this episode out, that's likely the reason. can't see myself losing interest in mota anytime soon but ik that if someone's usual writing pace suddenly slows down, ppl often jump to that conclusion (myself included lol) and i just want to make it clear i will Not be abandoning my fics and as of now, i'm still plowing ahead on all of them. AND THAT'S ALL FR BACK TO MY GOOGLE DOCS fuck do i think this is a journal?? jesus christ my bad

[no-name-blu]

A thought. John turning evil by some entity promising him a way to protect his friends and Melissa. But he’s just doing the right thing g but the wrong way

When they used to be Welcome Home OCs, that's literally John's plot in my AU, Gameshow Host! Wally XD

But it's more of a fun side plot that can be taken out/ignored. This plot shows more on what the real world is like, how the cult fans of the show are formed, and also shows what happens to the winners of the gameshow. Because according to Wally, they usually turn into a threat to Humanity.

Here's an old comic that I never finished, glad it gets to see the light of day now :D

You can get their lore explanation down here!

I figured to reveal it since they're not Welcome Home OCs anymore and I'm not gonna draw all of this

CW: VIOLENCE AND CHARACTER DEATH, A LOT OF READING

Melissa, John, Briella (My OCs) and Sunny (that bird character), are a friend group together. Briella was the very first contestant of the show and dies, making Melissa wanting to investigate it and she's been non stop working about it.

And then, maybe 3-6 months later? idk, John got picked to be the contestant and won, so he asked his prize to have the ability to help Melissa. So Home gave John this opportunity to have a tour in the studio with Wally. So the day that happened, Wally showed him around, the problem with foreign objects going to the studio, it starts to deteriorate, especially for one's sanity. John eventually runs off Wally's tour and try to find more secrets in the studio just to accidentally found the void where Home resides in. His brain did not recover from seeing Home, he doesn't remember what happens after that. But John got Home's powers now YIPEEEE

Also his mind is in shambles in a way it's like an "enlightenment" to him. He sees it like the show is actually a good thing, weeding out the evil in the world. And he wanted to help more than anything.

John finds more people to see this show the way he sees it. He somehow got Melissa convinced too (old idea was that he can do hypnotism) When he tried to convince Sunny, he disagreed, leading to John to think he's evil and such, ended up killing him. Both the idiotic and crazy couple basically going on a killing spree to form a cult fan club of the show :D Honestly, imagine JD and Veronica from Heathers, but they're both JD. They're what killed the dinosaurs, they're the asteroids that's overdue /lyr

Eventuallyyy Melissa starts to snaps out of it, telling John she doesn't want to do this anymore, noticed Home has been watching them and she wants to make a deal with him. Home says something like "make one big sacrifice, and I'll give you what you wish for" Not very helpful but still she took the deal. Then the comic above is what's next. After that, they fought.

John was about to kill her but held back and gave Melissa a chance to fight back, so she starts punching, beats him up until the marionette puppet stops being alive.

Somehow the result of this made Home gave Melissa her own powers with the glowing eyes and Home's pupils too. Basically saying, now she serves for Home and that she's also gonna go crazy, like what had happened to John.

But Melissa didn't take over the cult, that'll be someone else. What she did is help Wally find a suitable contestant for the episode.

This plot probably got some holes and not that fleshed out since I stopped writing into it. It was fun tho :D

If you wanna know the other nickel, it's their Reboot AU lore. John was also cray cray for a different reason.