#it seems the ‘on loan’ to AT thing is not only something that pushes the narrative but also allows him to keep his whole mcl severance packa

[rickybaby]

Money Badger strikes again!!

[girlgenius1111]

when i break, it’s in a million pieces

alexia x putellas!reader

the pressure on r is intense, from her sister more than anyone. an injury pushes her to her breaking point. desperate not to let her sister down, r struggles under the weight of her injury.

-----

Something that was always said about your sister was that she pushed everyone around her to be better. This was something that you knew to be true on a whole other level. The pressure of being Alexia Putellas' sister was immense; not just from the media, and the coaches, and the team, but from your sister herself. She expected a lot from you, she always had.

Alexia knew better than anyone what it took to be a great footballer, and when you expressed to her that you wanted it too, she promised herself that she would help you get there. The raw talent was there, and with your sister by your side, it seemed to the world that you would be unstoppable.

It was your first real season with Barça, having spent the last 2 seasons on loan at Sevilla. It had been good for you, helped develop your skills and allow you to be independent. Now, at 20, you were back in Barcelona, playing with the first team, and with your sister, for the first time.

Your sister always toed the line between pushing you just hard enough, and pushing you too hard. Your mother often had to step in, and get Alexia to back off, just a bit. Not that you were on the team with her though, where she was the captain, training with her everyday, you couldn't really go to your mother for help when Alexia pushed you too hard. You just... took it.

It was a lot, several stressful months at the beginning of the season where you tried to carve out your place in the team. It felt like Alexia was breathing down your neck, always asking for more. It was an environment that you had thrived in, before. And then you'd gone on loan, and you'd learned to push yourself.

Alexia's pushing, compounded with your pushing was, if you were honest, too much for you. You could never tell your sister, though, not when she was just trying to get you to be the best version of yourself.

It didn't help that the media had wild expectations for you; they were expecting you to perform how Alexia had when she was 28, and you were only 20. Every mistake, every missed shot had media outlets questioning if you would ever be as good as your older sister. You knew Alexia didn't pay attention to the things said about her online, and you tried to do the same. You weren't as successful.

Things only got worse when Alexia hurt her knee. Your heart ached for her, knowing exactly the toll not being able to play took on your sister. Still, you were suffocating in her absence from the pitch.

You needed to be better, stronger, faster, play harder, pass more precisely, shoot right on target every time. You needed to be passionate, but not hot headed. Confident, but not cocky. You felt like you were being pulled in a thousand different directions; every move you made seemed to be the wrong choice. Your solution? Work harder. Train extra. Push yourself to the absolute brink.

Everyone seemed to realize that you were pushing yourself too hard. Everyone, that is, except your sister. She only saw the results, how well you were playing. It was like she was blind to how exhausted you looked. Your teammates tried bringing it up with you, and with Alexia, but you both insisted that there was no problem. Alexia, because she genuinely didn't think there was one. And you, because you would rather drop dead than disappoint your sister.

Somewhere deep inside, you had convinced yourself that if you weren't perfect, completely and entirely perfect, Alexia wouldn't love you the same. Your sister's praise and approval was something you'd always sought; only recently did it reach the point that you were willing to do anything to make her proud of you; fuck your body and it's limits- Alexia was counting on you, expecting things of you, and you were going to do them. No matter what it took.

-----

It made sense, then, that your body would reach it's breaking point. The load on you was immense; playing almost every minute of every game. You were overworked, but you wouldn't admit it. You'd gone back out for the second half of the game against Eintracht Frankfurt, dismissing Jona [and Irene, and Patri, and Marta]'s questions about coming off to rest. You had more to give, you assured them. And give it your all, you would.

You were on the left side of the pitch, attempting to dribble past one of the opposing midfielders. The tackle wasn't really very clean; she came sliding in towards your ankles after the ball was already sailing towards Mario. Still, if you weren't so exhausted and overworked, you would have seen her coming, and moved out of the way. Or, at least, you would have managed to move just enough that the tackle wasn't catastrophic.

Instead, she caught you just right, crashing into you so hard that your ankle rolled in a way it wasn't supposed to. You felt the crack as well as heard it, the excruciating pain that followed forcing you to the ground.

Your head was left completely untouched, and the ref let play continue, apparently feeling that the tackle didn't deserve a yellow. You felt like you could feel every nerve ending in your ankle being lit on fire, at the same time as a deep ache permeated out from the bones in your lower leg. It was unlike anything you'd ever felt before, truly. You were on your stomach, face hidden away in the crook of your elbow, as you raised your other hand in the air, gesturing wildly for help.

Your heart was racing, ankle throbbing, as you felt everything come crashing down around you. This couldn't be happening. How could this be happening?

"Y/n?" Ingrid asked quietly, resting a hand on your back. Mario had kicked the ball out, and the medics were sprinting across the pitch towards you. Ingrid was closest, and while the rest of the team stood frozen, praying to anyone they could think of that this wasn't as bad as it seemed, the Norwegian crouched down by you, able to hear the small, pained whimpers escaping your lips.

"Ingrid, help," you choked out, reaching blindly for her. She grabbed your hand, holding tight.

"The medics are almost here, just hang on."

-----

Up in the stands, Alexia sat, watching on in absolute horror, at the way your body laid on the pitch. She'd been much too far away to hear the crack, but she knew what a broken ankle looked like. Your reaction only confirmed it. She was gripping the arms of her seat like her life depended on it, barely able to tear her eyes off you when Mapi called her name for the third time.

"Go, Ale. Get down there. She'll need you." Mapi nudged, looking to Jana when Alexia made no move. Mapi was still on crutches, unable to grab Alexia and go like she needed to. Jana got the message, standing and grabbing Alexia's hand in hers.

"Alexia," she called, waiting until her captain's eyes looked up at her. "Come on. She needs you." With another tug on the blonde's hand, Jana got Alexia to stand, before she pulled her out of the row of seats, and towards the stairs.

-----

The medics had maneuvered you onto your back, before they asked you what hurt. They already knew, even as the question left their mouths.

"What hurts?"

"Ankle. It's bad, it's really bad," you cried, before yanking your jersey up to cover your face. It was bad enough that this was happening, and the entire stadium, everyone watching being able to see you cry only making it worse.

You stayed in your little hiding place, shirt covering your face, until the crowd of medics around you, combined with the medical cart that had been driven onto the field, provided enough of a shelter. When you removed your kit from your face, you were met with the sight of most of the team standing over you, pained expressions across their faces. You were handed the dreaded green whistle, which you tried to push away. The medic insisted, and Irene leaned over you, as if daring you to reject it again.

You accepted it, then, taking deep inhales of the medication. Your brain felt hazy, suddenly, and it didn't really register when they put the puffy orange cast over your leg.

The team hovered, silent support, as you were moved onto a stretcher, and then the cart. You were left with pats on the shoulder and kisses on the forehead before the cart began moving, driving off the pitch. The crowd clapped as you went, and all you could think was that you had no idea how long it would be before you could get back on the pitch.

-----

"Where is she?" Alexia questioned, grabbing the arm of the physio attempting to pass by her. She'd been waiting for you by the medical rooms for a few minutes, only growing more nervous as time passed.

"Ambulance. They're taking her right to the hospital." The physio replied, looking sympathetically at the blonde.

Alexia swore, taking off down the hall and towards the doors. Thank god she was cleared to run again. The blonde just barely caught the ambulance before the back was slamming shut, hopping up and in. She slid in right next to the stretcher, instantly leaning over you.

"I'm here, pequeña." She murmured, taking in the absolutely devastated expression on your face.

"It broke, I heard it break." You whispered. Alexia felt like her heart was being squeezed at the sound of your shaky voice.

"It's all going to be okay, I promise."

You shook your head. "I'm sorry, Ale." You barely got the words out, a loud sobbing ripping it's way out of you.

Your sister looked confused, reaching a hand down to cradle your cheek. "You don't have anything you need to be sorry for, hermanita. Nothing."

The conversation was only agitating you, and the paramedic gave your sister a look, one telling her to change the topic.

"Does it hurt?" She asked, glancing down at your heavily wrapped ankle.

You bit your lip. "No."

Just then, the vehicle hit a bump, jostling the stretcher slightly. Your ankle was jolted, and you let out a high pitched squeak, gripping on tight to the sides of the stretcher.

"Sure, it doesn't hurt." Alexia sighed. "We're almost at the hospital, okay? They'll fix you right up."

Alexia was speaking to you like she had when you were much younger; when the injury to be fixed was a scraped knee, not a broken bone. It was comforting, though, a glimpse of soft and sweet Alexia that you hadn't really seen much of recently.

"Can you call mom?" You asked quietly. Your sister swallowed back tears of her own at how young you seemed suddenly. You were only 20, and though normally you acted much more mature than that, she was reminded of your age by the look of complete fear in your eyes.

Your mother, however, was out of the country on a girls trip with her friends She had been texting Alexia pretty much nonstop since the injury, and Alexia had only managed to reply to one of the texts. She told your sister, though, that she didn't have good enough cell reception to call. Alexia was going to have to be enough for you.

"Her internet isn't good enough to call, remember? I'm right here with you, though. I'm not going anywhere." Alexia vowed, peeling your hand of the side of the stretcher, and wrapping her hand around it.

Your sister didn't miss the unsure glint in your eyes, and although your hand tightened around hers, she could tell that you were holding back from her, at least a little bit. The trouble was, she didn't understand why. You used to go to Alexia with all your problems; she was one of the only people you would let see you cry. Now, though, you chewed aggressively on your bottom lip, blinking away your tears.

Alexia wondered when you'd stopped trusting her the way you used to, and why.

-----

Thank god that Barça had connections at the hospital; you were in and out of x-ray fast, seen by the doctor, put on crutches within the hour. Your foot was encased in a moon boot, all the way up your shin, and you were... miserable. There was a permanent scowl set on your face, and you were answering your sister's questions with simple yes's and no's, refusing to make eye contact.

Alexia's chest ached seeing you in this much pain. She felt like she used to feel when you were little, and you'd cry; like she'd do anything, anything at all, to make you smile again.

Your other sister arrived in a flurry of chaos, and Alexia watched on as you practically melted into the hug Alba offered. She didn't understand; you went to Alba when you were in trouble, or if you wanted to goof around. You went to Alexia if you were upset. That was how it had always been, but suddenly, you couldn't look her in the eye.

"Olga went to go get you some stuff from your apartment. You can stay with Ale until you're better, alright?" Alba said.

Alexia didn't know when Alba had contacted her girlfriend, or how the decision for you to stay with her had been reached, but she was glad for it. You shouldn't be on your own, physically, and if your current attitude was any indication, also mentally.

"Did the doctor say how long you'd be out?"

You grew visibly pale at the question. "At least 4 months."

Alba opened her mouth, clearly about to comment on how that was... a long time for a broken ankle. Alexia elbowed her in the side, sending her a look to not bring it up. Alba promptly shut her mouth, figuring Alexia would explain later anyway.

What she didn't know was that you'd broken both your fibula and your tibia. The bones would take time to heal, time to rehab, as well as the partially torn muscles in your ankle. You'd asked about surgery, but the process wouldn't be sped up at all if you were operated on. You had no choice, but to wait it out. 4 months away from the pitch. 4 months.

"Hey, y/n?" Alexia said, waving a hand in front of your face.

"What?" You asked.

"I said your name like 5 times." Alexia told you, taking in the bewildered expression on your face. You'd completely tuned out, lost in your thoughts.

"Oh."

"Ready to go?" Alexia asked finally, when you didn't offer an explanation.

"Yeah."

You stood, slightly shaky on the crutches from the pain medicine, and began to make your way to the doors of the hospital. Your sisters followed close behind you. They didn't know it, but anyone looking at the two of them would have instantly known they were sisters; sporting matching worried frowns as they watching you move down the hall. Neither of them was really sure what to say to you, to make you feel better, and they hated standing by and watching you be upset. Nothing seemed to be working though, and you offered them nothing as you made it to your sister's car, sliding into the backseat without a word. The car ride back to Alexia's was completely silent, both of your sister's were lost in their thoughts, as you were.

-----

Alexia lay awake in her bed, unable to shake the feeling that she needed to check on you. Staring at the ceiling, her mind was racing, through every interaction she'd had with you recently. She couldn't figure out when you'd started acting so... strange. In retrospect, it had definitely gotten worse recently, and she hadn't noticed. The blonde had been busy, dealing with her knee and her contract renewal. Now that she'd taken the time to really look at you, for the first time in weeks, she saw someone who was hurting. All she wanted was to fix it.

"Go check on her, Ale." Olga spoke up from next to her girlfriend. "I can hear you thinking from here, just go so you can see she's fine, come back, and go to sleep.

Alexia considered for a minute, before leaning over to kiss her girlfriends cheek, and sliding out of bed. She was wearing socks, and her footsteps were quiet as she padded down the hall and to the door of the guest bedroom. She was just going to peek in, but when she rested her hand on the knob, she heard quiet snuffling whimpers coming from behind the closed door.

Twisting the knob and stepping into the room, the sounds cut off with a sharp breath. Alexia didn't say anything, not yet. Instead she walked closer to the bed, towards where you were facing away from the doorway, pretending to be asleep in the middle of the bed. Your body was trembling under the covers, so much so that she could see it even in the dark. She took a careful seat on the edge of the bed, reaching out to rest a hand on your arm. As soon as she did so, you broke, curling up into yourself as a heart wrenching sob fought it's way out of you.

Before your sister could say a word, you were twisting to face her and gasping out an apology. "Sorry, Ale, I'm sorry."

Alexia didn't know why you kept apologizing to her, but she desperately wanted you to stop. "Shh, just let it out. It's all okay, nena."

"It's not okay, Alexia, it's not. I can't play. I can't play, not for months. I can't do it, I don't want to do it." Nothing you were saying was really making any sense to your sister, but she was sure she wasn't getting any more out of you while you were still so worked up.

"Just come here, nena," she murmured, opening her arms up for you. For a second, you looked so unsure, so apprehensive, and Alexia felt like crying herself. Then, something inside of you must have given up, and you were launching yourself, as best you could, across the bed and into your sister's arms. Alexia held you close, humming a soft tune as she held you tight against her, like she used to do when you were very small.

For once, you didn't worry about disappointing her, or seeming weak in front of her. You let yourself fall apart completely, your sister's arms wrapped around you feeling like the only thing stopping you from breaking into a million pieces.

"You are strong, pequeña, so strong. You can do this, I know you can. My strong hermanita. You can do anything. I bet you'll be back on the pitch before 4 months is up." Alexia's words only seemed to make you cry harder, so she stopped talking, focusing on rocking minutely back and forth.

What if you weren't strong? You knew you weren't as strong as your sister. What if you were weak? What if you couldn't do it? Alexia said you should be able to come back before 4 months, but what if you didn't? You'd be disappointing everyone, Alexia most of all. The fear of that, of letting her down, felt like it was squeezing all the air out of your lungs, until all you could do was cling to your sister, and wait for it to pass.

It wouldn't pass. The thoughts wouldn't stop ricocheting around your head, your deepest fears and anxieties. Everything you'd been pushing down for weeks was bubbling to the surface until you were a trembling mess in your sister's arms.

"You have to calm down, nena, breathe." Alexia tried to remind you. You could only shake your head frantically, and your sister sighed, her worry increasing. "Okay, let's go call Alba."

Without another word, she held tight to you and stood up off the bed, walking towards her room. You were past caring, at this point, where you had your breakdown. Calling Alba might be a good distraction, you thought. So, you wrapped your arms around your sister's neck, trying to steady yourself.

-----

Olga had just been considering getting up, and going to check on the pair of you, when she heard her girlfriend's steps returning down the hall. They were slower than normal, and her lips tugged into a smile, knowing exactly what was about to walk through the door.

Her smile fell when Alexia walked in with you in her arms, the miserable sounds you were making filling the silent room. She made eye contact with her girlfriend, feeling her heart sink at how helpless she looked.

Alexia placed you in the middle of the bed, pulling away just slightly so she grab her phone and call your other sister. She hit Alba's contact, absentmindedly rubbing your back as you cried into her. Olga scooted closer, resting her head on Alexia's shoulder, hoping to provide some comfort to her girlfriend, who looked completely distraught at the state you were in.

"Hello?" Alba answered, grumpy at being woken in the middle of the night.

"She's really upset, can you talk to her?" Alexia asked, forgoing a greeting and holding the phone to your ear. Alba sat straight up in bed, her soft voice a stark contrast to the tension and stress flooding her. She began talking, about her day, about her week, about the silly thing she'd seen at the dog park the other day.

Your sister's soothing voice, your other sister's calming patterns rubbed into your back, Olga's nails scratching lightly at your scalp, all probably combined as you began to calm down.

Alba's voice had vanished, and Alexia smiled despite herself, knowing the other girl had probably fallen asleep talking. When your sobs quieted to small whimpers, and your sharp gasps for air turned to the occasional hiccup, Alexia spoke again. You were half asleep, and you felt safe, so safe, so tired. You let Alexia's words wash over you, the final push before you shut your eyes, drifting off on top of her.

"I love you, so much. Always. I'll be with you the whole way, nena. I promise you."

Groggily, you wondered if she meant it. If she really would be with you through this, if she really would still love you when you inevitably failed. Because you were sure you weren't strong enough for this. Despite your certainty, you also knew that you would do everything you could to meet your sister's expectations. The doctors had said 4 months, you'd do it in 3. No matter what it took, no matter how hard it was. If you failed, you'd deal with that later.

-----

[barcaatthemoon]

flustered || ona batlle x reader ||

patri decides that she's over you trying to avoid ona when you come back to barcelona.

you hated the circumstances of your return to barcelona. you had spent so much time in london that you had almost forgotten that it was just a loan. your contract was nearly up, and you'd spend the last season of it back in barcelona, where you no longer felt like there was anything for you. it seemed like the team had completely replaced you, including ona.

your attempts at staying in london were futile. they didn't have the budget the keep you there for another season, not when barcelona had made an outrageous demand for money. jona wouldn't play you, so you didn't understand why they were so insistent on you coming back. still, you returned to spain and tried to get back into your old routine.

training was fairly easy for you. the exercises were different, but you went the same amount of days as you had in london. in your spare time, you went to the gym every single day. it was rare for you to stay in your apartment by yourself. occasionally, you let loose with the team on a bonding night, but never for too long.

it was silly, but you had a hard time being around ona and lucy. not a lot of the girls knew how you felt, but the ones who did left you alone. you had followed ona to england, but ended up staying for nearly two years longer than she did. something had happened up there, and it killed some of the girls not to know what it was.

truthfully, it hadn't been anything nearly as serious as you were making it out to be. you and ona had been friends, best friends at that. there had been seedlings of unfriendly feelings between the two of you, ones that didn't get better with the bit of distance between manchester and london. if anything, they only seemed to get worse for you. you couldn't be around ona without becoming a flustered mess.

it didn't help that when your eyes had met, she'd blush and look away as well. some might have taken that as a sign that she liked you back, but all it did was make you nervous. ona could have been a sure thing for you, but you were terrified of the idea that she liked you back. for some reason, you had convinced yourself that it was easier to pine over ona than to actually be happy with her.

"okay, enough of this!" patri shouted as she clapped her hands together. everybody looked over at her, and subsequently you as well. the two of you had been working out together. for the longest time, ona had been your gym partner at barcelona, and while patri was happy to do it, she couldn't stand watching you look longingly at ona from across the gym.

"patri, what are you doing?" you hissed as she dragged you over to where ona and lucy were running.

"both of you, start talking, now!" patri wasn't usually so forceful with you, and you weren't sure what to do except for obey. you hated that she knew how easily you'd submit with a little force, something you would never forgive leila for telling her. "come on now, i don't have all day."

"patri, please," you pleaded with her. unfortunately for you, the woman didn't relent. she only pushed you even closer to ona, who just barely managed to catch you. up close, you could see how flushed she was, and it didn't look like it was just coming from the workout. "ona, are you okay? you look a little…"

"i'm fine!" ona was quick to shout out at you. both of you winced at the sudden increase of volume.

"god, i can't watch this anymore," lucy muttered. she walked away, patri joining her as the two of them complained about you and ona. the look on your face was nothing short of confused. you could have sworn that lucy was dating ona, and the woman wouldn't have just left the two of you like that if it really was the case.

"a-aren't you going to go with lucy? it's not very nice of her to just leave you here. i'd never do that to my girlfriend," you said. ona's mouth opened and closed as the pieces clicked into place.

she had been so confused about why you were being distant. at first, she had chalked it down to you missing your arsenal teammates. however, as the season went on, she noticed how things were almost back to normal. the exception of you being distant with her had ona's mind absolutely spinning. she couldn't remember there being any tension whenever the two of you had last seen each other. if anything, you'd been a bit more affectionate at the last national camp.

"lucy is not my girlfriend. she thought you were at first," ona admitted. "then she thought it was either jana or patri. neither one of them are yours, right?"

"ona, i haven't had a girlfriend in nearly two years. not because i'm like a freak or anything, it's just hard for me sometimes. there was someone i did like at arsenal, but it didn't seem fair…" you trailed off, glad that you had stopped yourself before you said anything too embarrassing.

"fair?" ona asked you.

"it's not fair to be with someone if you love someone else," you said quietly. ona gently cradled your face in her hands as the two of you stood in the corner of the gym. "i went all the way to england to stay close to you."

"i didn't want to assume at first. and then, well, you never said anything. you just kind of got quiet, so i thought you were mad at me." both of you felt like idiots as the pieces fell into place around you.

"you were making me nervous. i couldn't say anything without mixing up my words. i didn't want to embarrass myself or say the wrong thing," you told her.

"you could never," ona reassured you. "can i kiss you?"

"take me on a date first," you laughed. ona sighed and nodded. she began to turn away from you, but you grabbed her and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "patri was my ride, so maybe coffee after practice?"

"you can come see my new coffee machine. the girls are all very impressed by it, even alexia," ona said proudly. you liked the sound of that, unsurprised that ona planned to take you back to her place. she knew that you were a homebody, and a familiar place would make you feel most comfortable.

[mountttmase]

Are We Okay?

Note - happy Saturday 🩷 I’ve been meaning to post this for the longest time so I hope you love it 😌 this one it set around the fa cup semi final in the 21/22 season (I miss my chelsea) so it’s a bit of a throw back. As always feedback is appreciated so let me know what you thought 😘

Pairing - Mason Mount × Reader

Word count - 7.9k

Warnings - angst and fluff

Seven years.

Seven years you’d known Mason. Meeting by chance in his hometown when your parents had randomly bumped into each other. You didn’t know who he was or how your dad knew his dad but you were captured by the brown eyed boy from the second he smiled at you.

Turns out your parents were friends at school and hadn’t seen each other for over 20 years meaning they had a lot to catch up on. Tony, Masons dad, invited you all round to his the next week for a bbq so they could catch up and meet the rest of his family. A tradition both of your families kept up for the years to come making sure to meet up at least three times a year.

He seemed a little shy at first, but then again so we’re you and it wasn’t until all the adults were drunk he finally came over and sat with you. You had some things in common, both liking the same music and tv shows so when he asked for your number so he could send you a few songs you felt your body heat up all over at his suggestion.

Mason was a boy. Not just a boy but a very attractive boy and very attractive boys didn’t seem to want anything to do with you. 17 and you’d never had a boyfriend or been kissed let alone anything else. You knew Mason was out of your league though and even though you liked to imagine what it would be like to kiss him, you knew you never would.

This was only made even more clear when he got a girlfriend, Sienna, eight months into your new found friendship with him. Even though you were happy for him on the outside, you were disappointed and hurt that he’d fallen for someone else so quickly when you’d know him for longer. You wanted to be there for him though, always giving him tips on what girls like so he knew how to treat her.

You thought your relationship might have suffered when he went on loan abroad for a year but he always kept in contact, even inviting you out for a week when you had some time off so the pair of you could spend some time with each other. He seemed so happy and carefree and your relationship seemed to change from there. You grew a lot closer, he confided in you and told you things you knew he hadn’t told anyone, including Sienna. The pair of you were best friends and you were always there cheering him on.

When he came home and went on loan again, you were pleased to find out he was playing near where you were studying meaning you got to see him as much as you liked. Spending your weekends at his games and even eventually forming a close relationship with Sienna. Even though you found it hard, seeing Mason happy that ‘his girls’ were friends made it easier for you to get along with her.

This meant lots of double dates, whether that be other boys from Masons team, other friends of his or Sienna’s and whilst it was embarrassing and awkward it was nice to have a boy’s attention for once. Mason seemed to have a problem with all of them however Sienna was always pushing you get out there and meet new people so when you started hanging out with one of her friends a few times after the double date she was over the moon for you. Nothing came of it but you were proud of yourself for getting out there.

You still had a year left of studying when returned to play for Chelsea and whilst you tried to see him as much as you could, it was an important year for you and you both knew you had to knuckle down. It was all worth it in the end though, and the pictures of you and Mason at your graduation was something you still treasured to this day.

When things between Mason and Sienna ended, you were in your new flat with your new roommate Grace. You hadn’t lived their long but he’d knocked on your door at around 10 in the evening and you opened your front door to find him looking back at you with glassy eyes and a frown. You took him to your room where he laid in your arms and told you she’d ended things because she thought they’d grown apart. He fell asleep in the crook of your neck as your fingers danced over his scalp and you smiled at the fact he’d come to you in his hour of need. The pair of you had never been in this position before, with Mason being in a relationship pretty much the whole time you’d known him so when you woke up to him looking at you softly your heart gave a thud.

‘Sorry about last night, I just didn’t want to go home alone’

‘You don’t need to apologise, Mase’ you whispered as he reached out to hold your hand. ‘I’m glad you came here. You know I’ll always be here for you’

‘I’m so glad I’ve got you’ he told you, kissing your forehead gently as he tucked you into him. You were blushing furiously at his words and you wanted to tell him you felt the same but you knew your voice wasn’t strong enough.

As the years progressed and Mason gained popularity you saw him change right before you eyes. They were small and subtle changes at first but by the time he’d reached his 24th birthday it was like he was a whole new person. Gone was the polite and slightly shy boy you’d always known, instead a bold and self assured man now stood in front of you. Somehow he’d grown even more gorgeous but the fact that he knew it made him insufferable sometimes. Thankfully for you there were no more girlfriends on the scene but you knew he slept with other girls which made your heart hurt even though you knew you didn’t have a right to feel that way about it. The pair of you were still close, keeping in touch often but you didn’t see him as much as you’d of liked to but this just made the times you did see each other more special.

You tried putting yourself out there, eventually growing close to someone at work who was a few years older than you. He was your first everything and even though you’d always imagined having those with Mason you knew you had to let that dream go. You thought you finally had it all figured out but when he asked you to move in with him and you panicked he decided to end things as he thought you weren’t serious about him. To give him his credit, Mason was there for you, just as you had been for him, telling you he was never the one for you but thankfully you weren’t as heartbroken as you thought you would of been.

It was early March, and you were at Tony’s house for your family get together. This one being inside as it was still cold out but you hadn’t managed to talk to Mason all night. He was constantly on his phone and when everyone started heading to bed, you were shocked that he pulled you into the kitchen so you could talk privately.

‘A bunch of my old friends are out at that new club that’s just opened up, you wanna come with?’ He questioned and your first instinct was to say no. ‘Please come, I’ve barely spoken to you today’ he pouted and you huffed as you crossed your arms.

‘It’s not my fault you can’t take your face out of your phone for five minutes. And anyway I’m not exactly dressed for the occasion’ you told him, looking down at your old jeans and plain jumper. You looked dressed for the weekly shop rather than a night out but he wasn’t having it.

‘You look great, plus it’s dark in there so no one will see anyway’ he shrugged. ‘Please, y/n. We never do stuff like this. I promise we won’t be long, just a couple of hours’ he begged and it wasn’t long before you were agreeing to go with a roll of your eyes.

‘Fine, but I really can’t stay long, I’ve got a long drive home tomorrow’ you argued but he was already pushing you out the door.

The club was loud and dark as Mason had promised promised. The only good thing about both of those things is that he kept his hand in yours so you wouldn’t get lost and when he spoke to you his lips would be right near your ear in order to hear him.

You had one drink, sticking to water after that so you would be sober enough to drive home in a few hours but that didn’t stop Mason from trying to get you to join in with everyone else doing shots, rolling his eyes with a huff every time you declined. This wasn’t exactly your idea of fun, following Mason around like a lost dog since you didn’t know anyone else and when you checked your phone for a few moments you looked up to find he was gone.

His few hours were up and you searched around for him, eventually finding him at the bar with a curvy red head hanging off of his arm as he drunkenly whispered in her ear. You didn’t want to interrupt whatever was going on even though it stung to watch but you were desperate to get back so you could sleep so after a nervous gulp you made your way over to them, tapping Mason on the shoulder hard enough to get his attention. He looked at you with a sour expression before turning back to the girl and saying something to make her laugh before leading you outside to a quiet and empty smoking area.

‘We need to get going, Mase. It’s getting late we’ve been here for ages’

‘I’m not ready to go yet’ he slurred ‘Cant you just head back on your own?’

‘Seriously?’

‘Yeah? Can’t you see I’m talking to that girl, I can’t just go now’

‘So you’re choosing a girl you met barely five minutes ago over me? Nice Mason thanks for that’

‘Why the fuck does it bother you so much?’ He asked, brows furrowed as he became increasingly annoyed at you. ‘You jealous or something?’

‘W-what?’ You laughed, trying to play it off but every word that was coming out of his mouth seemed to hurt you more and more.

‘You try and act like your my girlfriend all the time and you’re not. Like where do you get off on trying to control me? Telling me where I’ve got to be all the time. Like I’d ever want to be with you anyway’ He uttered, eyes harsh even with all the alcohol swimming through him. You were too stunned to speak, not knowing where all this was coming from. You felt your eyes sting as he looked at you in anger and you didn’t know what to say. ‘What? Got nothing to say cause you know I’m right?’

‘I’m just trying to look out for you’

‘No you’re not, you’re just trying to keep me for yourself. I’m not yours y/n, and I never will be. I didn’t even want you here tonight I just knew how much a nag you’d be if I left you at home’ he sneered and you felt your eyes well up even further, dropping your eyes to the floor so he couldn’t see how upset you were. ‘Oh don’t turn the water works on to make me feel bad, it’s not gonna work. It’s pathetic y/n you need to move on’ he laughed bitterly, but you’d had enough of his attitude. You took one last look at him before making your way back inside and fighting your way out the front door.

He didn’t follow you and you held yourself together the whole way home in the cab, only allowing yourself to cry a little bit when you were finally in bed. You didn’t know what had come over him to say such horrible things to you, racking over your brain to think of any times you’ve been slightly overbearing but you couldn’t think of anything. An hour and a half after you were home you finally heard Mason walk through the door, heading straight to bed and not even coming to talk to you or see if you’d made it back safe which only made you more upset.

When the next morning came, you packed up early and made an excuse about there being an emergency at your flat so you could leave without seeing him. When Debbie said she’d wake him up so you could say goodbye you told her to leave him and that you’d call him later, not wanting to look at him right now as you made the lonely journey back home.

Grace knew something was up instantly. Having lived together for three years now you knew each other pretty well and she was quick to open her arms for you. You didn’t cry, but your eye’s watered a little bit causing you to bite your lip hard to hold everything in. You told her you weren’t ready to talk and she nodded, just letting you stay in her comforting embrace as you watched some tv and caught up on your missed sleep. When you went to bed that night you still hadn’t heard a peep from Mason, in fact you didn’t hear from him for three days until he eventually called you. You let it run until the call ended, thinking he would try and text you but to your surprise he left a voicemail that you listened to immediately, the sound of his voice making your tummy hurt as your eyes watered.

‘Hey, y/n. It’s me I uh… I just wanted to talk to you um could you call me back please? Thanks’

He sounded tired and upset but you were in no mood to speak to him right now, not after everything he’s said to you and considering he didn’t even try to apologise you didn’t call back, even resulting to switching your phone off when you went to bed as he kept calling you and you knew you’d cave and pick it up.

The next morning you were awoken to what sounded like a hushed argument outside your door before it swung open to reveal Mason, Grace looking at you with apologetic eyes but you knew she couldn’t do anything about it.

‘Sorry y/n. He just barged his way in, I couldn’t stop him’

‘It’s fine’ you smiled at her sympathetically as Mason made his way inside your room. She gave you a look as if to ask if you wanted her to stay but you shook your head before she gave one last look to Mason. He was too busy looking at you so he didn’t even notice and you gave her one last smile before she walked away, closing the door behind her.

‘What do you want, Mason?’

‘You haven’t spoken to me in days’

‘Oh, I wonder why that is’ you breathed sarcastically, sitting yourself down as far away from him as possible whilst he stared at you from across the room.

‘Well that’s the thing, I wasn’t exactly sure and I’ve been racking my brain trying to think about why’ he told you, but you just stared at him, hoping he wasn’t going to make you explain everything he’d said to you. ‘I was a dick to you, wasn’t I?’ He breathed and you dropped your eyes to the floor. ‘I’m so sorry, y/n. I don’t really remember what I said exactly but I remember being angry and you storming off. Whatever I said I didn’t mean it I promise’

‘Well you must of thought it at some point to say it so you did mean it’

‘I don’t even know what I said’ he argued, stepping towards you and kneeling down in front of you so he could try and catch your eyes. ‘Tell me what I said. Please? I wanna fix this’

You took a nervous gulp but kept your eyes down, not sure if you were strong enough to even repeat what he’d said to you and his hands on your thighs was only making things worse.

‘You basically told me to stop controlling you and acting like your girlfriend when I’m not and never will be’ you whispered, watching his brows furrow like he didn’t believe you. ‘You called me pathetic and told me to move on when all I wanted was just to head back cause we’d been there for hours and you told me to stop being jealous and go on my own’

‘I-I can’t… are you sure?’ He breathed and you looked at him with an annoyed expression.

‘Of course I’m sure, what do you think I’d just make that up?’ You asked, pushing his hands from you so he would realise how upset you were.

‘No of course not, but I’ve never once thought that about you. And I’d never let you go home alone you know that’

‘Well you did. You watched me leave and didn’t even check i’d got back alright so you could stay and impress whatever girl was hanging off of you’ you told him but he was looking back at you like he didn’t understand a word you were saying. ‘I get it okay? I’m not like the girls you want. I’m not enough for you and it’s fine’ you breathed and be looked like he wanted to argue with you but you didn’t want to let him speak. ‘I know you’ve only ever talked to me out of politeness cause our dads are friends but if you really think that about me I’d rather we just leave things’

‘No no, what are you saying?’ He panicked, standing up to tower over you. ‘That’s stupid, you know I don’t think that about you’

‘So now I’m stupid?’ You argued, standing up so you weren’t as little as he was making you feel.

‘Stop twisting my words’

‘I think you should go’

‘No I’m not leaving until we sort this out’

‘Why? You clearly don’t think that much about me so why so you care? Why am I not enough for you Mason? Just tell me’

‘Y/n stop, please’ he whimpered and you almost felt sorry for him, wanting to reach out and comfort him and tell him everything was fine but he’d really ticked you off this time. His voice was thick with emotion as he came towards you and you covered your face with you hands as you began to sob. Without a thought he held you to him and you hated the way you relaxed into his touch. ‘I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry’ he murmured into your hair through his tears and you were so close to breaking.

‘Mason?’ You breathed and you felt his pull back slightly, waiting for you to carry on. ‘Can you please go?’

‘Y/n-‘

‘Please, Mase’ you choked

‘Y/n please don’t do this, please’ he begged, his voice thick with tears but you were standing strong and not letting his emotions get to you.

‘I need some time. You’ve really hurt me and I can’t think with you around. Just please go’ you sobbed and without a word he pulled away dropping a small kiss on your forehead before slowly walked out of your room, shutting the door behind him. As soon as you heard the door click you broke down again, Grace silently coming in so she could wrap her arms around you to try and comfort you in anyway she could.

Mason didn’t try and contact you which you were great full for, giving you time to pull yourself together again over the coming days and weeks you could slowly feel yourself becoming normal again. After three weeks you even felt good enough to join Grace on a night out with some of her work friends. The next morning the pair of you were nursing your hangovers on the sofa when she gave you a funny look.

‘What?’ You questioned and she huffed before talking.

‘It’s Mason. He keeps messaging me about you and I wondered if you could talk to him?’

‘What’s he saying?’ You asked in confusion and she unlocked her phone to read through the messages.

‘Well it started off just asking how you were and checking in on you but you posted a story last night with Ed and he’s not stopped asking me about him since’

You took a gulp before unlocking your own phone, quickly flicking through your stories before you found the one she was on about. Ed was a friend Grace had known since uni and you’d met him a few times prior to last night so you were friendly with him. Hence why it didn’t feel weird at the time when his arms were around your waist, your back to his chest as you sung your hearts out into your camera. It was only when you watched it back that you saw how dangerously close his lips were to yours as he kept turning you slightly and you didn’t even remember him kissing your temple gently but it was all there for Mason to see.

‘What’s he said?’ You asked, locking your phone as you focused on Grace again, trying to forget what you’d just seen. She passed you her phone to see a barrage of messages from him asking who you were with and where you were so he could come and get you but thankfully Grace told him to leave things and that she’d try and get you to talk him tomorrow.

‘Can you please just have a word with him? I’m not saying you have to forgive him yet or whatever but you can’t ignore him forever’ she told you and you reluctantly nodded, knowing you’d have to have a word with him eventually.

You contemplated calling him but the thought of hearing his voice and then trying to string a coherent sentence together made you sweat so you carefully crafted a text in hopes he would understand where you were coming from. You kept it short and sweet, not really sure what you were wanting to say to him but you hoped it would make him listen.

You locked your phone after that, jumping in the shower so you could wash away the night before and you felt a lot lighter when you finally made it back to your room. You didn’t have the courage to see if he’d replied to you and spent the rest of your morning sat with Grace whilst you ate until you couldn’t handle not seeing if he’d replied.

‘Oh this letter came for you yesterday, I forgot to give it to you’ Grace mentioned, passing you over a thick white envelope and you had no idea what might be inside so you quickly opened it go find two tickets the the FA Cup semi final in two weeks time that you promised Mason you would go to. Your heart sunk as you saw the, not knowing if you were strong enough to be there for him even though you always promised you would be and Grace must of picked up on your disheartened expression.

‘Everything okay?’

‘Mason sorted me some tickets for the semi final in a few weeks’ you sighed and she gave you a sympathetic look. ‘I always promised I’d go to the big games and he really wants me there but I’m not sure if I can do it. We’re all supposed to go to his the next day for dinner too with his family and I just don’t know if I can’

‘Maybe just give it a bit, see how you feel nearer the time’

‘Will you come with me? To the game’ You asked her shyly and she nodded at you gently.

‘Of course, if you want to go then I’ll be there’

A day didn’t go by where you didn’t think about Mason, missing his presence in your life more and more as the days went on but you still couldn’t bring yourself to talk to him. The tickets he sent to you were a constant reminder every time you walked into your room and it didn’t stop there. You were never one for gifts but you couldn’t deny you adored the flowers he was sending to you every day. They were only small bunches but your flat was soon consumed by them and you felt awful every time Grace sneezed but you loved putting them out. Grace only agreed to keep them out when you started bribing her with the chocolate that he always sent with the bouquets as you couldn’t eat them all on your own.

Then when you you went to your favourite coffee shop you found out someone had paid for a months worth of coffee for you and it didn’t take long to work out who that was. He was clearly trying to get your attention but you weren’t ready to see him yet even though he was slowly breaking your resolve away.

You were still contemplating what to do about the game up until the night before when a text made your mind up for you.

‘Grace’ you called, walking into the kitchen to see her making herself a tea, eyes looking up at you out of curiosity. ‘Be ready for about half 11 tomorrow. And dress warm’ you told her, he face breaking out into a smile. ‘Do you think I’m doing the right thing?’

‘Doesn’t matter what I think. How do you feel?’

‘I always promised I’d be there and no matter what he’s said in the past I want to be a good friend. I know he’d do the same if it was the other way around plus it will look weird if I don’t go’

‘Well as long as you’re sure, I’ll be ready to go in the morning’

‘Thank you, Grace. I really do appreciate you’

‘That’s okay. Buy me a pint there and we’ll call it even’ she laughed and you couldn’t be more thankful for her.

You got there the next day in plenty of time, saying hello to his family who were none the wiser as to what was going on between you and Mason as you took your seats next to them. He was soon out for the warm up and you felt your heart swell at the sight of him, looking up to wave at his family and you could tell he was happy you were there. You couldn’t bring yourself to wave back at him though and you could see his pout from a mile off.

You had to admit he played really well and when he managed to put the ball in the back of the net you were out of your seat and cheering for him like there weren’t any issues between the pair of you. The smile on his face when he noticed you happy for him made your frosty heart melt a tiny bit and the urge to wrap him in a hug consumed you.

‘You coming into the family room with us to see him?’ Debbie asked you and you nodded albeit reluctantly knowing they’d only ask questions if you said you were in your way home.

‘We can just sit by the bar and make it look like we’ve spoken to him’ Grace reassured you as you walked in and you were happy she was with you as your moral support.

As soon as he came in you wanted to run into his arms and tell him how proud you were but you couldn’t, excusing yourself to go to the loo so you could gather yourself for if you needed to speak to him. You couldn’t see him at first when you eventually made your way back but it didn’t take long to see him stood talking to a girl. You rolled your eyes at his behaviour thinking it was typical of him to be doing that but you could tell from his posture something was up, your eyes glancing straight to her.

You could tell her type from a mile away, she only wanted Mason for one thing and you could see how uncomfortable he was as you got closer, knowing you might have to intervene if it came to it.

‘I um, I have a girlfriend’ you heard him tell her, clearly a lie just to get her to go away, knowing from the way he was stumbling over his words slightly that it wasn’t true but and she didn’t believe him either.

‘Oh yeah? Well where is she then?’

‘She’s around’ he murmured, eyes searching the room for anyone who might be able to help him and even though you still weren’t on speaking terms you couldn’t let him suffer like this, walking up behind him and placing your hands on his sides which caused him to jump slightly.

‘Hey baby, sorry I got caught talking to one of the girls’ you smiled sweetly at him, moving to his side where he automatically placed his arm around you when you snuck yours around his waist. He was stiff, clearly unsure of what was happening so you reached up to kiss his jaw in hopes he would cotton on.

‘That’s okay’ he smiled down at you, kissing your forehead as he pulled you closer. ‘This is my girlfriend, y/n’ he told the girl, smiling proudly and even though you knew it was all fake, hearing those words come out of his mouth made you shiver. The girl didn’t reply, just rolled her eyes and walked off and you took that as your cue to let go but as he felt you move he placed his other arm around you so you couldn’t go. ‘Wait please. Just until she’s gone’ he whispered so you stayed in his embrace, his familiar scent overwhelming you as his lips traced over you hairline.

You couldn’t see if she had gone yet, your face smooshed into his chest as you clung onto him and you knew he wasn’t going to tell you when the coast was clear. You looked up at him, his eyes on yours immediately and you felt your tummy drop.

‘Can we talk?’ He whispered, eyes filling with tears as he let his emotions get the better of him before tucking some hair behind your ear. ‘Please, y/n. I know I said I’d give you time but I can’t do this anymore’

He was right, this wasn’t healthy for the both of you to keep going on like this and no matter what came from it you knew it would be good to talk it out so you sent him a tiny nod to let him know you agreed.

‘I can come over to yours later maybe? I guess it’s best to talk before everyone is around tomorrow’ You whispered and he started nodding at you wildly.

‘Of course. I’ll text you when I’m home, yeah? You can come over whenever I’ll make sure everyone’s in bed’ he assured you before you pulled back. He let you go this time and you gave him a small nod before going back to join Grace.

‘You okay?’ She whispered as she took your hand and you smiled.

‘Yeah, I’m fine. Let’s just go’ you told her and you chanced a look back to Mason who was stood with his hopeful eyes on you, a small smile dressed on his face as he watched you go and you felt your tummy erupt with butterflies at the thought of talking to him later.

He didn’t message you until about 11:45 that evening, telling you he was sorry it was late but everyone had only just got to bed. Truth is you didn’t mind, you brain wouldn’t switch off anyway as adrenaline was pumping through you so you told him you’d still come if it was okay still. He offered to come and get you but you thought you’d give him some time to sort himself out whilst you made your way over and by the time he was letting you in, he looked freshly showered and dressed and you heart leapt as you caught sight of him.

‘Hey, come in’ he told you, stepping to the side as you walked in silently. ‘You want a drink or anything?’

‘No thanks’ you told him quietly and he gave you a shy nod before making his way to the living room.

‘Take a seat I just wanna grab a water’ he told you, running to the kitchen before joining you again. ‘what made you come to the game today?’

‘I always told you I would’ you answered and he gave you a small nod, shuffling in his seat uncomfortably before he sat playing with his fingers go a while. It was silent as you both thought about what you wanted to say next but you were waiting for him to go first.

‘You know I love you, don’t you?’ He told you quietly and your head snapped up to look at him. He wasn’t looking back at you, his eyes fixated on his fingers as he built up the courage to speak but you were afraid you might not be able to hear him now over your heart pounding in your ears. ‘And I know you still care about me. You wouldn’t of come today or helped me out earlier if you didn’t’ he uttered, his eyes finally peering up to meet yours. ‘Please say something’ he whispered, pleading with you to give him some scrap hope or inclination as to how you were feeling but you were in defensive mode. Unsure of if his words were genuine

‘I don’t know what to say’ you whispered, your heart dropping into your tummy when his eyes snapped back to looking at his fingers. No longer able to look at you when he knew what was about to come out of your mouth. ‘I don’t think-‘

‘I know what you’re doing’ he interrupted, his features a lots softer than you were expecting. ‘Please don’t push me away because you’re scared’

‘I’m not’ you lied, cursing him internally for being able to read you so well. You kept your eyes down hoping you could fool him for a bit longer but also because you couldn’t stand to see him this upset.

‘You were wrong about what you said. Us being friends has nothing to do with our parents. You’re my person, y/n. My best friend in the whole world who I love spending every second I can I with. It’s like I’ve felt homeless without you. I’ve got no where to go, no one to turn to. Please just let me fix this. I’d do absolutely anything for you’

You couldn’t listen to him anymore, his voice thick with tears as he let them flow down his face freely. He looked heartbroken as his bottom lip trembled with emotion and he looked like he was on the edge of breaking down. You couldn’t take it, your own heart shattering as you looked at him and without thinking you scrambled towards him, grabbing his face as you gently brushed his tears away. The touch of your skin on his seemed to have the adverse effect though as you were hoping to calm him down but he pulled you closer instantly, sobbing into your neck as he repeatedly apologised.

‘I’m so so sorry, please forgive me’ he hiccuped, holding onto you for dear life but you were set on trying to calm him down. You placed your lips to his ear, shushing him as you fingers found their way into his hair so you could scratch over his scalp gently as you rubbed up and down his back with your other hand.

‘It’s alright Mase, come on please calm down for me it’s okay’ you whispered relaxing back into the cushions so you could lean into each other. You tried to place gentle kisses on the side of his head, not caring you’d never done that before but you were trying anything to get him to relax and stop crying. Your own eyes were welling up at the state he was in but you willed yourself to stay strong for him. Keeping him tucked into your body even when you knew he’d calmed down you let him stay where he was until he was comfortable enough to pull away and look at you.

‘Sorry’ he breathed, and you wanted to tell him it was okay but you knew he had more he wanted to tell you. ‘I’ve found all this really hard you know? Not being able to talk to you and knowing you’re mad at me. I know it was my own fault but it sucks’

‘I know, Mase. I’ve found it hard too. I’m sorry we haven’t spoken sooner, I guess I just got in my own head and I didn’t want to deal with the fact that you might not want me around’ you sniffled, trying not to get upset as you wanted to talk this through with him.

‘Of course I want you around. I hated not speaking to you these past few weeks, I’ve missed you like crazy’ he breathed, holding you face by your jaw so you would look at him properly. ‘You’re my best friend and I let you down. I can’t tell you how sorry I am’

‘Why did you say all that stuff to me?’ You whispered as you watched his face drop before his lowered his gaze. Too embarrassed to look at you properly as he thought over everything.

‘I wish I knew, I really did. I can’t believe I’d ever say that stuff to you cause I don’t mean a word of it’ he breathed before locking eyes with you again. ‘You’re everything to me. You really are and it was all lies. I am yours, always have been. I don’t think you’re a nag or controlling and I’d be the luckiest man on earth if you were my girlfriend’ he laughed and you felt your face flush as you dropped your eyes from his. You whole body was thudding as your heart sped up at his confession, unsure if you were hearing him correctly and if you could handle him telling you any more. ‘I mean it. I’m sorry it’s taken me this long to realise. I’ve had a crush on you for ages but you’re so smart and you’ve got everything together so I never told you cause I figured I wouldn’t be what you want. And that’s okay, you deserve way more than I can give you-‘

You cut him off with a kiss, pulling back quickly as you’d shocked yourself with your actions but you’d just wanted him to stop talking as you knew he was rambling. It had definitely worked though as he stared back at you in shock, now seemingly lost for words.

‘Sorry, I just-‘

You couldn’t finish your sentence as he was now kissing you back, holding you in place as he slowly brushed his lips against yours and you felt yourself soften under his touch. He was unbelievably gentle with you and you could tell he was holding back so you kissed him back harder, butterflies erupting throughout your body as you caught onto what was happening.

You were kissing Mason. The boy you’d loved since you’d first set eyes on him and the realisation made you smile which in turn caused him to smile before you pulled apart.

‘You don’t know how long I’ve waited to do that’ he smiled, pulling away further so he could look at you

‘Not as long as I’ve waited’ you laughed and he gave you a curious expression. ‘Do you remember the day we first met?’

‘You mean that day in Portsmouth? Outside that pub?’

‘Yeah’ you laughed, looking down as you knew you were about to be embarrassed. ‘I’ve been waiting since then’ you told him and you felt him smile as he pressed a kiss to your cheek.

‘Why haven’t you ever told me?’

‘Cause you’re you, Mase’ you laughed, playing with your fingers as you were too scared to look at him but you knew it was the right time to speak up. ‘You’re the best person in my life but you’re way out of my league. Not even that, I feel like we come from different planets half the time and I’ve never got why you wanted to be friends with me-‘

‘Hey’ he interrupted, tilting your face up so you would look at him. ‘Please don’t talk about yourself like that. I’ve never once thought that about you’ he told you seriously and you gulped under his intense stare.

‘Sorry’ you breathed ‘I guess once you got with Sienna and then the girls after her it just made me think you’d never want little old me’ you laughed and you watched him pout in annoyance but you knew it wasnt aimed at you.

‘I’m sorry’ he whispered before kissing you again gently. ‘Wanna know when I knew?’ He laughed and you nodded enthusiastically. ‘As shit as it sounds it was when you got with that dickhead from work last year. When you told me I felt so weird and I couldn’t figure out why. Then I realised all the stuff you were doing with him I wanted to be doing with you’ he told you quietly and you gulped down a nervous lump. ‘I guess I sort of felt the same though, he was so different to me that I thought I could never be what you wanted. He was safe and reliable and I’m not sure I can give you that’ he told you quietly.

Your heart sunk as your eyes dropped to your lap. This was obviously his way of letting you down gently but you’d made your peace with not being able to be with him a while ago and when he pulled you in for a hug you didn’t push him away.

‘I want to try though’ he whispered into your hair and your whole body exploded with relief as he gently rubbed your back. ‘I want to try and be what you need cause these last few weeks have been absolute hell for me and it’s just made me realise you’re all I want’

‘Really?’ You breathed, tears escaping your eyes as he comforted you.

‘Yes’ he laughed, trying to pull back but you held him close, not confident enough to look at him just yet. ‘I know we’ve got some stuff to sort through but I really want you to be mine’ he whispered, and the vulnerability in his voice made you finally look up at him, pulling him into a gentle kiss immediately as he laid the pair of you down. ‘Are we in agreement then?’ He laughed, moving the hair out of your face as you smiled back at him.

‘I think so yeah’ you told him quietly as he yawned and you both laughed as you stroked over his jaw. ‘Keeping you up am I?’ You joked as he pulled you closer.

‘Just give me ten minutes, it’s been a long day’ he smiled, shutting his eyes as you pulled a blanket over the pair of you and cuddled into his chest. You felt his breathing deepen not too long after and you let yourself drift off with him.

You weren’t sure what time it was when you eventually woke up, but you knew it was light outside. You opened your eyes to be met with Masons staring right back into yours, a gentle smile on his lips as he took you in.

‘Good morning, beautiful’ he whispered, his thumb stroking across your jaw before he placed a gentle kiss to your lips causing you to smile.

‘What happened to ten minutes’ you laughed and he smiled down at you lovingly.

‘I know, but I was exhausted’ he huffed, repositioning himself so you were on your back and he could lean over you a little bit. His head resting in his hand as the other cupped your cheek and stroked it gently. ‘I know we didn’t really get to talk everything over properly last night, but are we okay?’ He asked quietly and you nodded up to him with a smile.

‘I think so. We’ve got time to talk everything through properly later but at least I don’t have to pre tend like I don’t hate you today’ you laughed and he looked at you offended before the realisation hit him.

‘Ah shit, I forgot everyone’s gonna be here. What if I wanna kiss you?’

‘You’ll have to wait till tomorrow’ you told him as he dropped his lip, clearly unhappy with the situation.

‘Well let me stock up now cause this is gonna be unbearable’ he smiled, leaning down to attach your lips to his and you hummed into his mouth as you reached up to cup his jaw.

You were so caught up in the moment you didn’t even hear the door open, but you pulled apart with a shock when you heard someone let out a little yelp.

‘Something the pair of you want to tell me?’ Debbie laughed as you tried to hide yourself in Masons body out of embarrassment. You felt Masons chest shake as he laughed.

‘Can you pretend you haven’t seen anything? Just for today?’ He asked and you chanced a peek up her just as she sent him a wink.

‘Fine, but you owe me. And I’d get up if I was you, Summer is on the war path already and you know she won’t keep her mouth shut’ she laughed as she fled to the kitchen and Mason quickly pulled you up and placed a heavy kiss on your lips as you heard Summer running down his stairs.

‘Let’s get this show on the road’

Thank you so much for reading 😌 I’d really like some feedback so please feel free to drop me an ask or whatever you feel comfortable doing, I’d really love to hear from you 🩷

[whorekneecentral]

sd! toto? this man is the biggest sugar daddy material hands down, like a billionaire. maybe the reader is student at Harvard (i know this type of prompt has been used many times but I can’t think of anything else 😭) she’s studying to be a professor and can’t seem to be paying her student loans. And her friend invited her over to the paddock for the weekend to get her mind off of her studies and relax, where she then meets Toto and there’s a attraction which then leads to him being her secret sugar daddy?

-jenson anon ❤️

jenson anon you are so sexy for this idea ily bae <3333

you thought you knew him from somewhere; your friend ran in all the high end, luxury circles because of who her parents were and when she introduced you to the team principal of mercedes; you knew you had seen him before.

he remembered you before you remembered him - the two of you had met when he did a lecture at harvard. you were telling him that you were getting your PhD so become a professor and he said if you ever changed your mind, you could come work for them.

you never bothered with his comment, you figured you'd never see him again; you had been too busy to even think about that. between school and working to be able to pay for school, you barely had time to breathe.

the only reason you were there is cause your friend's parents paid for everything.

the afternoon goes by, everyone gets busy and your friend eventually disappears when she sees someone she knows.

you were sat in merc hospitality, having a coffee when someone asked if they could sit with you. you look over and see toto.

you tell him go ahead and you two make small talk. he asks how the PhD is going, you tell him it's slowly killing you.

"what do you mean?" the man pushes his glasses up a bit, looking at you.

you shrug, "I might die before I pay back the loans I have." you joked, not really tho.

toto shook his head, "so stupid that you need loans to go to school, to work just to pay back the loans."

"tell me about it." you sighed, spinning the cup around on the table. it goes quiet for a bit before he speaks. "let me pay for it."

you look at him like he's insane, "no, absolutely not. you're very kind for offering but I cannot let you do that."

"why not? it's a good use of my money."

"I wouldn't be able to pay you back, it would kill me to just take the money from you."

toto nods, telling you he understood and the conversation drops.

"we can work something out," he starts and you cut him off, "I can't afford that-"

"no, not like that. uh, so I was thinking more along the lines of you just giving me some company."

you get what he meant and you can't help but laugh. "I'm not looking to be a sugar baby."

"no of course not," he shook his head, "just two friends who benefit from each other?"

"well when you put it like that." you nod, smiling.

toto asked you to join him for the races over your summer break, in exchange he paid for your next two semesters.

you got to travel the world and he got the company he wanted, while your school was paid for.

it was nice, you got to explore on the days you didn't join him on track. he left a card with you which you used for emergencies but he left it with you incase you wanted to shop or stop to eat somewhere. you two had dinner together almost every night, unless he was working late.

he spoiled you with lavish clothing and jewellery to match; you told him it was too much and he said you needed to fit in with the crowd so he's just making sure you don't stick out.

you both knew he just liked to spoil you, that was the whole thing.

the break in the race schedule came up, the drivers off to rest for the summer. toto asked if you'd like to join him in England, spend a few weeks with him relaxing.

you said okay; the 2 of you spent 2 of the 4 weeks in England, resting and getting to know each other properly- and by that I mean in bed.

one too many glasses of wine turned into flirting, into touches and stolen glances and eventually you two ended up going at it right on the deck.

the next 2 weeks were on an island, a little villa all to yourselves, rolling around in bed all morning, waking up to the sun and your lover kissing on you.

you returned to the paddock, toto a little more touchy than before but no one seemed to say anything even tho they noticed the change in the two of you.

[scoobysnakz]

part 2 of dbf miguel. so sorry this took so long, accidentally deleted the draft like twenty times.

The TV hums softly as a random sitcom you've not gotten the chance to see yet flickers across the screen. You know you should turn it off, it's distracting you from completing your essay, one you've been procrastinating about finishing, but the background noise is comforting enough to let you keep it on, even if you'll have to rewatch it all later.

“Need help with that?”

You jump at the sudden noise, pen now clattering on the floor and rolling dangerously close to the sofa. You look up at where the voice came from, only to be met with a freshly shaven Miguel.

Embarrassment burns the back of your neck as you shift on the plush cushion of the sofa. The only thing covering the crinkled page of your otherwise barren notebook is an array of flowers around the margin and random notes scribbled out in heavy, blotchy lines.

“Am fine,” you smile, fingers spreading out to hide your work, or lack of.

Miguel just scoffs at you before pushing your hand away. “Such detailed notes,” he chides.

“It's meant to be an essay, but thanks anyway.”

You hear him stifle a laugh that you pray is sympathetic and not as amused as it sounds. It's shameful how far behind you are on your schoolwork when you have someone peering over your shoulder.

You aren't quite sure why you're so pent up on impressing Miguel, a man who is staying at his friend's house for some unbeknownst reason.

He sits down on the sofa next to you, a respectful distance but you can still smell his overbearing cologne and hair gel fusion. The sofa sinks slightly at his weight, a low creak eminating through the room.

He laughs, “let me help.”

Irritation bubbles deep in your stomach but you try to push it away, ignore it and keep going with the conversation. But when he acts so casual, even though he's stolen your bedroom, your only haven in this monstrosity of a household, you can’t help but feel annoyed with him.

“I doubt it,” you quip with an air of ignorance, fingers drumming erratically on the inky pages, “this is biology, aren't you like a chemist or something?”

A smirk curls at the corner of his lips at your sudden attitude, but he doesn't comment on it, leaving your opinion of him more distasteful than ever. “Well my degree says organic chemistry and molecular biology, so you're both wrong and right.”

“Mmm, so either, you're loaded, or up to your neck in debt.” you don't even try to hide the snark in your voice, “considering the fact that you’re staying here, I'm guessing student loan got the better of you.”

He scoffs at you, hand clasped to his chest in feigned hurt. “I'll have you know, I have a well-paying job, thank you very much.”

You flip your notebook shut, a small sense of relief washing over you now that disgrace of an essay is hidden, and shift to face him. “Then why are you here?”

He swallows, hard, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. His gaze flickers between your face and the wall behind you, discomfort colouring his expression. The atmosphere of the room shifts entirely, and suddenly you feel guilty for hating him. Maybe he didn't mean to take your room, not on purpose anyway.

“I lost my house, not… not because of money or anything,” he pauses, plush lips pursed into a tight grimace before he continues, “didn't get a very good divorce lawyer.”

“I'm… sorry?” you've never been good at sympathy, always pushed the hard topic of emotions onto someone else so you can focus on something you're actually good at. But now, some weird part of you wants to comfort him.

“Hmm?” he looks back at your eyes, your breath catching in your throat, “Not your fault, querida, I was a silly man who did silly things. I made a mistake and lost the love of my life.”

“Don't say that.” you hate the way your voice softens. You want to keep this burning resentment for Miguel, loathe him for all eternity, it might seem petty but he deserves it. Yet, you want to pull him close, tell him to stop being so hard on himself and run your fingers through his hair until his jaw unclenches.

He shakes his head, casually, as if it was never that important.

“I couldn't stay faithful and I paid the price, she has everything she deserves leaving me with… nothing.”

An awkward silence fills the room. You don't know what to say to that other than, I take back my kindness and spit in your face for cheating on your wife.

“She was amazing, so full of life, and then one day… we just stopped clicking,” he leans back against the sofa, head craning back so that he's forced to stare at the yellowing ceiling, “it wasn't a spur of the moment, because I got bored thing. We had stopped loving each other, she had anyway.”

You reach out, your fingers brushing against his much more calloused, harsh ones causing the hairs on the back of his neck to stand on end. You give his hand a gentle squeeze that lasts a little longer than intended, but the sweetness of the action doesn't go unnoticed.

The upbeat theme tune from the TV suddenly blares out from the speakers causing the two of you to startle. Your fingers tighten around his on instinct but you immediately pull your hand away.

Miguel chuckles a low, mellow sound that makes your ears perk up. “Sat on the remote,” he says, pulling it from under his thigh.

“Scared the shit out of me, Migs- Miguel,” you breathe heavily.

He nods, smiling uneasily, praying that the hammering of his heart is from the sudden shock and not from the kindness you displayed. But deep down, he knows the truth.

prev <

[xqueen-of-disasterx]

Art deco

Artist!Natasha x Fem!reader

TW: smut, legal age gap, fluff, praise kink, degradation (slight), Top!Nat, Bottom!reader, Nat speaking russian, petnames

!Disclaimer English is not my first language so please excuse any grammar or spelling errors!

Word count: 1.6k

Masterlist

I was now living with Natasha Romanoff for nearly a year, and she was still a mystery to me. She was what you would call a real artist. She lived for her art, sometimes I felt like there was nothing more important to her than her art. Luckilyfor me she called me her art. I was her girl, the women she gifted her heart to, her masterpiece, her muse.

The first time we met was because she was searching for a female act model. Her payment was beyond decent, and I was a poor college student who had just hit her twenties. So, I signed up. To be honest I did not expect the artist for who I would be modelling to be so beautiful. Even beautiful wasn't a match for Natasha’s beauty. The first thing I noticed after she had first opened me the door to her big apartment was, how her green eyes were the perfect contrast to her fiery red hair.

She would draw me, touching my skin whenever she was rearranging my pose, I tried to hide my blush whenever she was touching me. But she noticed it, of course she did, she kissed me, and I didn't push her away like I thought would. No, I pulled her closer. I let her devourer me, touch me and fuck me. I should've felt bad, I shouldn't have told her to do the things to me, that she did.

The morning after I still didn't regret it. How could I regret her, when I loved the things, she would whisper to me in that night. When Natasha asked me to take me out a dinner, I said yes. 4 months later she asked me to be her girlfriend and 6 months later I moved in with her and for 5 months she was working on her so-called masterpiece. Something so great that it would overshadow even her most famous works and I wasn't allowed to see it.

I knock at her door "Natasha, you've been in there for twenty hours now. You need to eat something" I pause and sign "I miss you". After a few minutes she opens the door looking at me confused " TWENTY HOURS... lord I totally forgot the time" She strokes her short red hair. She hugs me pulling me closer to her kissing my forehead. "I'm nearly finished, моя любовь. I just need to add my finishing touch." Natasha grabs my cheeks gently stroking it, while making eye contact with me. "I need my muse in it."

I giggle at her words "First of all you need to eat something" I kiss her cheek softly "I made you Pelmeni and Morozhenoe for dessert" I can see her smiling at me while I grab her hand and take her to the kitchen "You're the best girlfriend I could ever imagine, but I would like something else for dessert you know" She smirks at me. "I love you too."

The dinner was more or less quiet from Natasha’s side she let me go on and on listening to me rant about my professors, exams I had do, or how exhausting it was to work at the local dinner. She would listen to me giving me advise sometimes she would even joke.

"Y/N" Natasha let out a sign "You don't need to work that much, I'm rich I can pay off your student loans. I would love to" She was right, somehow Natasha was always right. Maybe it was her age that made her so wise, or she just was an old soul. "I know, Natty, but I just want to have a small bit of independence."

"I just" she takes my hand in hers gently kissing it "I don't like to see you so sad моя любовь, but enough of that" She stands up taking my hand "I want to show you what I'm currently working on" smile at her walking after her following her into her gallery.

She opened the door me making me step into the large room. It had big windows with a high ceiling making the room appear warmer. Finished and half-finished paintings fill not only the Walls but also the ground. Natasha didn't seem like a messy person, but the room contradicted that statement.

"So, where is this, masterpiece" I ask she comes up right behind me kissing my neck "Right to your feet зайчик" I look down seeing the large canvases laying on the ground without the frame "Natasha, why is frame missing?" She laughs pulling the hem of my blouse out my pants before unbuttoning it "I bet you can figure that out with your pretty head дорогой."  She groans against my neck before turning me around for her lips to meet mine. 

She kisses me passionately and I kiss back with the same passion if not more. Our lips mat like puzzle pieces into each other, like they are meant to be together. Natasha keeps kissing me, pulling me impossibly closer to her. Licking over my lips, asking for permission to enter my mouth, which I didn’t let her have. She groans against my lips.

Her hand travels down my body unzipping my pants before tugging on it pulling off. Before she harshly grabs my ass, squeezing the soft flesh making me moan against her lips. Natasha using this opportunity to slip her tongue into my mouth. We don’t fight for long dominance, I let her have it because I know it would be a losing game.

She trails her kisses down my neck, sucking and biting on it forcing strangled moans from my mouth. “Natasha, please~ touch me” I can practically feel how she smirks against my skin “I am touching you зайчик“. If she keeps calling me nicknames in Russian and I’m going to melt on the spot. I whimper desperately making her smirk only grow wider. Her hands reach to my unhooking my bra pulling it off.

“Lay down for me, моя любовь“ She whispers in my ear biting down on my earlobe making me moan “On~ on the canvas?” I’m breathing heavily at the feeling of her hands kneeling my soft skin “Where else? Like I said, зайчик, I need the finishing touch of my muse”. After her words she keeps kissing my lips helping me lay down on the canvas. The paint under me is cold and in some places still wet.

 Her kisses trail my body down, stopping at my breaths. Taking one of my nipples in her mouth, sucking on it. “Fuck Natty” I moan out throwing. My other boob isn’t neglected, Natashas hand kneels it roughly. She kept sucking on my nipple before biting down making me release a pornographic moan. She keeps kissing and sucking on my skin leaving dark marks behind as if she would want to claim me. Show everyone that I was hers.

Slowly she lowers her kisses to my hips, kissing and nibbling on my skin. It feels like I can’t take her teasing anymore I want more and I want it now. “Natty, come on don’t tease me any longer” I whined out hoping I would make have mercy with me. But she just smiles against my skin “You truly are a slut, so desperate for more, while not thanking me for what I give you. I thought you were my good girl.”

 I can feel how my face reddens at her comment. “I am so sorry, Natty. Please, please fuck me. I’m going to be good so good for you!” She smirks against my skin, lifting my hips slightly to pull down my panties kissing and sucking dark marks onto my thighs. I try to keep my whimpers quiet but fail miserably. Natasha kisses my clit, flicking her tongue over the nob.

I let out desperate moans, grabbing her red hair pulling her closer to my heat. She groans at the slight pain she was feeling on her scalp. “Shit, Tasha, you’re so good” I moan out as she gives me the best pleasure I could imagine. As she moans at my words I feel it vibrating through my body. She pumps one finger inside of me curling and penetrating my hole. “More” I whimper not being able to form sentences in my state of pure pleasure.

She adds a second finger curling it against my g- spot, I scream out in pleasure repeating her name like a prayer. “Fuck Natasha I’m so close, so close” She smiles and fucks me harder. “Cum for me, зайчик“ I cum right after her words with a loud moan of her name. She climbs up my body again whispering sweat nothings in my high built down. My breathing gets calmer as Natasha pulls her fingers out.

“You are so good, so good for me Y/N” She taps her fingers against my legs signalling me to close my legs around her waist. She stands back up holding me in her arms. Natasha looks back down at the painting, that was now smudged in the bottom half from my body. She smiles at me and kisses my head.

“It’s perfect, зайчик“ She smiles at me “Now lets get you cleaned up”

"I love you"

"I love you too"

[solarwonux]

Business Proposal || knj (2/?)

pairing: namjoon x f!reader || ex friends to lovers!au friends to lovers!au

Genre: fluff, angst, smut, slow burn, fwb!au, non idol!au, unrequited love

Warnings: slow burn, angst, namjoon is pretty much not the nicest dude lol (will add more as it progresses), kinda sugar daddy au but not really. It will make sense I promise.

Rating: mature, 18+

w.c: 9k

Synopsis: Namjoon is living on borrowed time, and it’s time to cash in. His father is months from taking his last breathe and his life long dream is to watch his oldest son say “I do.”

a/n: Hello, this is longer than I expected it to be, but anything to get the story moving. LMK your thoughts and if you want to be added to the tallest! Enjoy!

m.list

prev || next 

“I thought you stopped smoking.”

Jungkook jumps at the sound of your voice, eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights. The burning cigarette in between his index and middle finger. He opens his mouth to say something, but decides against it and closes it, shaking his head. He looks out into the backyard, and takes another puff of his almost gone cigarette.

You sigh and go to stand next to him, leaning against the porch railing as you stare out into the same backyard. Silently wishing it was Spring again. Mrs. Jeon and Lia’s backyard always felt magical. Filled with flowers and greenery that always made it feel like a dream. But in the winter months it was barren and depressing. Nothing exciting grows except for the Lenten Roses in a pot next to the last porch step.

“Bad habits die hard.” He shrugs, taking another puff. “You should know.” He looks over at you, blowing out the cloud of smoke in your face.

You cough, fanning the cloud away. “You’re an ass.”

“Sometimes you ask for it.” He shrugs, throwing the white stick on the ground and squashing it with his boot. “Shouldn’t you be inside, gushing about wedding dresses and invitations with mom, while dad kisses Namjoon’s feet for once again being the perfect son.”

He stuffs his hands into the pocket of his pants. You sigh, coming to stand next to him, wrapping your arms around his waist and hugging him tightly. “Don’t be like that.” You whisper. “You’re lightyears a better person than your brother.”

His chest shakes with a humorless laugh. He has the urge to push you away but you’ve always been the only one with the ability to see through the perfectly curated images he and his brother have built over the years. “It’s always the same. I’m always the degenerate, the one who broke the rules growing up while Namjoon followed them. I’m the one who dropped out of college but he’s automatically the better son because he didn’t, and is now working on his PHD. While I work at a small flower shop, with a freelance photography job on the side. I’m the leech they can’t seem to get rid off.” He lets out a shaky sigh before pushing himself away.

“Jungkook d–”

“No, don’t say anything because you’re helping him knowing very well what he’s done to you. You’re feeding into what they want, and you can tell me it’s to benefit yourself. But how many times did I offer to help you pay out your student loans? How many times did I offer to help you find a better job? And you never took it because you wanted to do it yourself and I respected that boundary. But now that he comes back and offers you the same things with an added marriage proposal on top. You suddenly decide to take up on the offer.” He rants, running a tattooed hand through his long hair. “It fucking sucks because I know he’s going to hurt you and I don’t know if I can be there for you when he does because even if I have never had any sort of romantic feelings for you. I do love you and it hurt so much seeing you so broken and not being able to do anything about it.” He paces, invisibly mapping out the situation with his hands.

“And I can’t even fully hate him either because he is my brother and not many people understand our relationship but I know he loves me. He just has this weird ass way of showing it, and if he hurts you again, I’ll be put in the middle and I don’t want that because I can’t leave you alone and I can’t leave him alone either.” He breathes out, dropping his head feeling defeated.

It’s everything he wanted to tell you yesterday at the flower shop, but he didn’t want Yoongi to see him like this. Truthfully he wasn’t going to let you know either, but seeing the happiness on his parents' faces made him feel more bitter than usual.

You walk to stand in front of him, placing your hands on top of his shoulders. “Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

Jungkook clicks his tongue in annoyance before shaking his head in disbelief. “I know a part of you still loves him and I know that part will fall for him the second he starts acting like the old Namjoon again. I can’t stop you and I can’t stop him either.”

“You out of all people know that I’m not the same person I was then and you know why. You’re right the person that loved him is still inside here but she knows better. I won’t fall for him the way I did then and what happened that night won’t happen again.” You say, hugging him tightly again. “I appreciate you worrying about me, but I can take care of myself.” You whisper, rubbing his back lightly.

He sighs, finally hugging you back and kissing the top of your head gently. “I wish it was Jimin instead.” He adds, making you laugh a bit at the end. That was a whole new can of worms you didn’t want to get into.

At least not now at your fake fiance's parents house.

“I was scared.” He admits, burying his head into your neck. “When you called me and told me to pick you up in tears. I honestly never wanted to kill anyone more than I did that night.” He whispers. You blink away the tears forming in your eyes. Jungkook’s never been honest with you about what he felt that night. You never asked because you were scared of knowing the truth. And now that he’s voiced it you can’t help but feel your heart break all over again.

“I’m sorry, I did–”

“No, don’t be sorry it’s not your fault that he–”

“Am I interrupting something?” Namjoon’s curiosity breaks the two of you apart in an instant. Quickly you wipe away the fallen tears from your cheeks. You step away further from Jungkook while he does the same, avoiding eye contact with the older man as if you’ve been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to.

Namjoon has always had a wild imagination, hence his profession of choice. And right now his imagination is running him up a road he knows he shouldn’t go down. He had been looking for you for at least fifteen minutes, and when he heard your voice along with Jungkook’s voice coming through the patio screen door. He couldn’t think straight, especially not after hearing his little brother be so vulnerable, but he also couldn’t help but wonder what else the two of you were talking about.

As far as he’s concerned the infamous fight between the two of you happened in your old bedroom. Your parents were out on a date and he had come over so you could look over one of his essays. He left your house in a hurry, getting on his bike and pedaling as fast as he could to get away from your house with his heart pounding against his throat.

Had you gone somewhere else after?

Now, he needed to know, only because his curiosity would not let him forget until he knew. It was one of his fatal flaws. Probably the most annoying one.

“Um, I know you came with Kook but it would be weird now if you left with him.” He too feels weird, especially because the two of you looked like you’ve just stolen three cookies out of the jar before dinner. He hates it, it only feeds the little curious demon inside of him. “I have to be somewhere at five so I came to tell you that I’ll take you home but we have to leave in like fifteen minutes to beat the traffic.” He nods, scratching the back of his neck before taking a look between the two of you, and it suddenly hits him like a truck.

Wait, were the two of you secretly seeing each other. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Wait, but what about that Jimin guy? Hold on, were you seeing the of them at the same time, hol–

“It’s fine we are done here.” Jungkook looks over at you, giving you a smile to ease your overwhelming anxiety, and walks to the entrance, patting Namjoon’s arm before heading inside.

There’s a pregnant pause between the two of you, before you decide that it’s been long enough for you to go back inside too. Before you even get the chance to move, Namjoon speaks up, burning his stare into yours.

“Are you seeing each other?” He voices out, finally giving in. He regrets it because the look on your face makes him realize that he’s said the wrong thing.

“You’ve been saying a lot of stupid shit lately.” You shake your head, taking it as your sign to leave. If you have to be in a car with him for an hour. You might as well save your energy. His genetic material is full of nonsense. “I’ll wait for you inside.” You say walking in and leaving him alone in the barren patio.

He can’t help but wonder about a lot of things. All of them start and end with you.

Namjoon is driving.

It’s a view you never thought you would ever see. Back when the two of you were friends he had very strong opinions about driving. The one time you asked after he showed up at the coffee shop drenched in rain water.

He said, “The world will be better without me on the road.” He laughed running off to ask the workers for a towel.

“What?” Namjoon says after stopping at a red light and looking over at you. One eyebrow raised.

“Nothing, it’s just strange.” You shrug. “I never thought I’d see you driving.” You point out, watching as the red light turns green. He steps on the gas, making a smooth right turn and glances over at you. A smirk painted on his features.

“I got tired of biking everywhere.” He says, leaning his right arm on the middle counsel. “This is also more convenient than asking JK to drive me everywhere when it rains or snows.”

You nod looking out the window. “What happened to priding yourself in having a small carbon footprint and world peace or whatever?”

Namjoon chuckles, shaking his head “I still bike most of the time just not to moms house or when it rains. As for the world peace thing. I don’t think being off the roads will stop wars.” He pulls the car to a stop and looks over at you again. Now that the two of you are alone he can’t help but think that maybe you did get a little prettier than what he remembers. Though you still don’t compare to all the women he’s ever dated. Most of them being nepo babies or supermodels. You’re still quite attractive, maybe in another life he wouldn’t have thought twice about sharing a life with you. But you still weren’t the woman of his dreams. Though, the more he navigates through life he’s realizing that such a person simply doesn’t exist.

If they did he wouldn’t be here in the car with you.

“Oh,” you jump up as if you just remembered something important. And before Namjoon can begin to understand what was happening the light turns green again and he’s pressing on the gas pedal. “I forgot to give this to you.” You say, holding out your hand in his view of sight with his mothers ring.

“Keep it.” He says without missing a beat. You’re shocked and you’re about to fight against him, but he beats you to it. “We’re going to be spending lots of time together. It’d be weird if you didn’t wear it when we’re together.” He reasons. It makes sense but you hated every second that passed by in which you had it on.

In a few months it wouldn’t be yours anymore. Plus it just felt wrong to be wearing it knowing it will someday go to someone else.

“You can just keep it and then when we go to places together, just give it to me.” You nudge his arm with your open hand. He glances down at it before looking out to the road.

“No need, you’ll be moving in anyway.” He nonchalantly says, shrugging his shoulders as if he didn’t drop another bomb on you.

Moving in?

This whole deal was taking turns that you didn’t expect. You knew he offered you a house in which you honestly weren’t going to take. But you didn’t think you’d be moving in with him. From what Jungkook tells you his apartment is more of a museum than a home. And you like your little apartment. It was perfect for one person, it had everything you needed and it was close to two subway stations. It was absolutely perfect and the rent wasn’t crazy expensive.

Rent.

That’s another thing to take into consideration. Would he make you pay for rent if you did by some miracle agree to moving in, because you’re more than positive you wouldn’t be able to afford it. Not now with your passable income from the flower shop. Of course, that chapter of your life will soon come to an end, but even working as a professor in your prestigious alma mater wouldn’t be enough to pay whatever crazy amount his rent is.

“Hold on, that wasn’t in our deal.” You close your hand in a fist and bring it down onto your lap turning your entire body to face him.

Namjoon rolls his eyes. “The cats out of the bag what would people think when they figure out we are engaged but not living together.” He pulls up into the parking lot of your apartment building and puts the car in park. He turns his entire body to face you, one hand gripping onto the steering wheel. “I don’t think you understand how crazy mom can be. She will be over unannounced every other day now that she knows we’re getting married. It’s best to avoid all those questions because they can get invasive.” He states, turning off the engine and opening up his door. He looks over at you. “I can’t stay long but I’ll walk you to your door.”

You were beginning to get annoyed with how nonchalant he was acting about all of this. For a person who claims this was all fake he seemed to be trying his hardest to make it seem as real as possible. You’re starting to wonder if you should set up some ground rules first before you make such a serious decision.

What if you do move in? When all this is over what will happen to you?

You have no doubt in your mind that he will kick you out the second he gets tired of this scheme. You have no doubt in your mind that he will begin to act like this never happened. It is what he does best. He crosses boundaries and when you make it known he acts like he didn’t and that you were in the wrong the entire time.

It’s what happened then, but this time it will be different. This time you’re determined to keep your guard up as high as a skyscraper. This time you won’t fall for his smile, his charm, his laugh or his heart. This time you’re going to put yourself first and to be able to do that you need to have a serious conversation. Set some ground rules before you can continue anything else.

“Namjoon, wait.” You say as he’s getting out of the car. He rounds the front and opens the passenger door for you.

“What, I need to be somewhere in fifteen minutes, let’s go.” He rushes out looking down at his Rolex then you.

You get down from his car, stepping to the side as he closes the door. “We need to talk about this.” You use your pointer finger to single the space between the two of you.

He lets out an annoyed sigh and pinches the bridge of his nose. “We will, but not today. We can have lunch next Wednesday after you come in for training.”

“Namjoon I just don’t think you understand. You’re making all these choices without getting my opinion first. I understand you want your parents to believe that we are actually engaged. And I understand that you have a lot left to lose. But you’re not the only one in this. I get to have say in this too and I–”

Namjoon holds his hand out to your face, blocking your words from coming out. “I get it and believe me I would love to talk about it because we have a lot of things to discuss but I really can’t today. I have a dinner meeting with a coworker and I need to pick her up in—” he looks down at his watch and up, “-in ten minutes.” He finishes and starts walking in front of you.

A dinner meeting? On a Sunday? With another woman?

You don’t want to be that person. You firmly do believe that men and women are able to be friends without anything romantic and sexual happening between them. But he’s acting a little bit suspicious and you can’t help but wonder if he’s going out on a date.

God, you’re so annoyed it’s honestly becoming very tiring. And you’ve only been fake engaged for a few hours. You can’t begin to imagine what the next months will be like or for however long he plans to keep up the scheme.

He calls out your name. He’s standing in front of your building entrance, snapping his fingers to hurry you up.

“I’m not a dog.” You roll your eyes, and push past him. You press the button to the automatic door and hold your hand out before he can take another step. “And I don’t need an escort.”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“And you’re going to be late for your date.” You state stepping inside, leaving him floored with your little outburst. He wants to follow you and tell you a few choice words, but the ringing of his phone keeps him from pressing the button again.

He can talk to you another day. Right now you’re right about one thing. He is late. Even if it’s not a date like you have just assumed. He hates being late to places.

In a relationship.

The little phrase next to yours and Namjoons name has been haunting you since you got the notification last night. Least to say you had not gotten a wink of sleep. You had messaged Namjoon asking him what it was all about. The two of you had not talked since Sunday and making your fake relationship official on Facebook for friends and family to see was definitely something you didn’t see him doing.

It had caught you by surprise. What surprised you the most was the comments underneath the status, offering you kind words and congratulations. The few “it's about time,” comments had set you off. You weren’t sure if it was because you were engaged or because the two of you were engaged to each other. It had your mind racing in all sorts of directions.

Yet, what really didn’t let you sleep was Taehyung’s messages and Jimin’s cryptic “it all makes sense now,” text you had woken up too.

Your fake fiance always prided in living a life away from the drama. And while he’s having a blast living a fantasy you were on the other end receiving nasty messages from your friends and what you assumed were women he had been with once upon a time.

It was all getting too much. You were supposed to be enjoying your last shift ever at Euphoria before you ventured off into the world for bigger and better things. But here you were blocking comments and ignoring Taehyung’s angry spam and Jimini’s nasty comments, with a knot at the base of your throat.

You’ve never hated Namjoon more than you did now. Since he was ignoring you, probably annoyed with your constant pleading to delete the status. You would have to wait until you saw him again next week to scream in his face.

What didn’t help was that Jungkook had called in sick, so you were stuck with the brooding owner, sending you a glare whenever he heard you sigh.

“Okay, out with it. What has you acting like the queen has died?” He cuts a stem off a rose, before placing it in the middle of a few baby breath branches.

You put your phone down, face down hoping it would somehow keep the notifications from coming. “First the queen has died. Second, Namjoon is so fucking annoying. I…ugh.” You let out a frustrated sigh. Probably the thousandth one of the day before putting your head in your head, cradling it.

The headache that you had woken up with after three restless hours of sleep was only growing to be worse. You hear the older man laugh before patting your back awkwardly. “I think this is the part in which Jungkook would be saying I told you so, but I still fully support you getting the bag you deserve, and unfortunately whatever he did is part of the consequences you just have to face.” He states proudly before retrieving his hand and going back to the bouquet he was working on.

You raise your head, hoping your glare would bury him six feet underneath the ground. “You’re no help sometimes. I don’t know why I even ask for your advice.”

Yoongi clicks his tongue before shaking his head, “You see that’s where you’re wrong. You didn’t ask for my advice. I’m just telling you the honest truth. Now if you can’t take it then you shouldn’t have accepted the deal in the first place.” He shrugs, wiping his hands on his apron before grabbing a pair of scissors. He goes to the ribbon wall behind him, taping his chin with the tip of them in thought.

“What did he do this time anyway?” He says getting a hold of a lavender one and measuring it before cutting it off.

You lift up your phone, opening it quickly and navigating yourself through the homescreen before clicking the bright blue app. “This! He did this without letting me know.” You extend your phone showing him the status.

He leans his head forward squinting his eyes before breaking out into a smile. “Congratulations, I knew the two of you would be perfect together.” He jokes, making you groan out in annoyance. He chuckles, cutting up some flower bouquet paper. “Jokes aside, that is an asshole move, but what else would we expect from the devil himself.” He says grabbing the bouquet and placing it in the middle of the pale pink paper. “You knew what you were signing up for.”

“Ugh, I know, I know, I know. I don’t need you to remind me.” You push yourself off the counter as soon as the bell to the shop dings signaling someone has walked in. “It’s the aftermath of his actions that’s sending me up the wall. I really ha–” You turn around putting your best customer service smile only for it to fade away the minute your eyes come into contact with ones you’ve grown up with.

The warmth they once held for you is gone, now replaced with stone cold anger.

“Jimin.”

“Do you want to explain to me what’s going on?” He pushes his way past you and walks to the aisle full of supplies. “Because the last time we talked you told me you weren’t ready to be in a relationship and as much as it hurt I respected that but now you’re here engaged. And to Namjoon?” He says exasperated. You follow him, thanking god the shop was empty because this wasn’t where you wanted to have this conversation.

You knew it would eventually come and you would have no other option but to have it. Yet, lately the world has been throwing curveballs at you left and right since Namjoon came back into your life. So, what else could you expect?

Plus Jimin has never been one to keep his emotions bottled up. It’s one of things you admire most about him. When he was angry he would voice it. When he was sad he would cry freely and explain why. And when he was happy and in love he had no shame in letting the whole world know. Which is why you couldn’t continue anything with him anymore. Even if he was the one that made you feel comfortable again in your body and encouraged you to explore things with him. You didn’t feel anything towards him other than friendship. It’s not like you didn’t try. You did the moment you realized he had fallen for you months ago. It’s probably why you prolonged cutting things off with him, but you couldn’t do that to him anymore.

Not when he had verbally confessed and was giving you everything he should’ve been giving to someone who didn’t view him as more than a friend. The two of you should’ve listened to everyone who said it was a bad idea, but both of you were stubborn. That’s something you aren’t afraid to admit. Unfortunately the decision the two of you made almost a year ago was now coming back to bite the two of you in the ass. Though for some reason it felt like you were getting the shorter end of the stick with everything that had gone down in the last few days.

Maybe you were cursed?

“Min I can explain.” You whisper yell, reaching out to him. He retracts, throwing his hands up and steps away from you.

“No, I don’t need you to explain anything to me. I saw what that man did to you and you went back to him after cutting things off with me.” He spits out, venom laced in his voice as he cards a shaky hand through his already messy hair. He stops for a second biting his bottom lip and looks over at you.

“Were you seeing him while we were together? Were you with me when he couldn’t be with you? Because I can’t even begin to explain how fucked up that is. Especially for someone like you but I guess I didn’t know you as well as I thought I did.” He rants, his hands shaking as he finds somewhere to put them to hide the visible anger he is feeling inside.

“It’s not like that Min, please just let me explain.” You plead, taking cautious steps closer to him. Gripping your apron tightly to keep yourself from crying. This is why you admired your oldest friend for the longest time. He wore his heart on his sleeve whereas you couldn’t let yourself cry in fear of looking pitiful and weak.

He takes one final look at you before shaking his head. “No, I don’t want anything from you. I just want you to stay out of my life.” He says before walking past you, bumping your shoulder with his and walking out.

This is what you feared the most. Losing him. You did have the intention of telling him what was happening when the time was right. This whole situation with Namjoon wasn’t something you ever intended on keeping a secret from both him and Taehyung, but of course you could never walk at your own pace.

For as long as you can remember nobody ever let you march to the beat of your own drum. Everyone around you always forced you to act whenever it was suitable for them. And right now as much as you were at fault too, you couldn’t help but blame Namjoon and his impatience.

Every day that went by, you realize how much this was inconveniencing you rather than benefiting you like you had originally thought.

“Now, I think this is the part in which Jungkook would say I told you so.” Yoongi speaks out from behind you.

You roll your eyes, shake your head and send him a glare. In a haste you untie your apron and rip it off. “I quit.” You say walking past the counter and throwing the fabric onto it.

Yoongi shrugs, trying his best to give you a reassuring smile in which it looks like he’s in pain instead. “Impossible when you only had five more minutes left of your final shift.”

That’s the last thing you hear him say before walking into the back and finally letting your tears fall down.

You’ve had your fair share of heartbreaks in the past.

When you were five you had your first boyfriend–Paul. A blooming relationship that lasted merely three days. On the first day of school he gave you a note with a poorly drawn flower and “I love you” written in the center. In his best five year old handwriting. On the second day he kissed you in the line on the way to Spanish class–dared by his best friend–Pedro. And on the last day, he played with you on the playground but on the way back to class he was holding hands with another girl.

Your first heartbreak.

Then you embarrassingly harbored a crush on him for three years after. In fifth grade–Christian had stolen your heart as soon as you saw his crooked smile and overly slicked back hair, but of course he had picked the prettier and meaner girl in class–Yuni.

Your second heartbreak.

Though, the infatuation didn’t last long, you forgot about him as soon as you entered middle school.  But you remember your heart beating out of time when you saw him at Sunday school. You were in seventh grade. Your body was changing. You felt awkward as hell listening to a sermon while fantasizing what it would be like to hold his hand.

When you were fifteen on the other hand. All hell broke loose.

You fell out of love with a lot of firsts in your life, and everything felt so black and white. Things that made you happy. That you viewed as pillars slowly started fading away. It started with ballet, then it trickled down to your studies. You didn’t feel like doing anything, your feelings were confusing and you felt angry with everything and everyone around you. To add the cherry on top your crush of possibly four years broke your heart–Jung Hoseok.

He was perfect. He was tan, tall, and handsome. He had a beautiful smile with moony eyes. He was funny and smart and loved to dance. You had met him during your first dance practice back in seventh grade. All it took was a smile, a wink and a killer freestyle for you to fall head over heels for him. He was nice, he sat with you during lunch whenever Taehyung and Jimin had a different one. He helped you out with your math homework and he even cracked jokes about your favorite boy band at the time. He would ask you about your day and make sure you didn’t skip your meals.

Jimin and Taehyung were so tired hearing you yap about him twenty four seven and so they offered to help you out. The three of you came up with a plan on how to confess to him, but all of that went down the drain one Wednesday afternoon.

The tears didn’t start falling when you saw the self proclaimed bad boy holding hands with one of the popular girls from school–Harley. They came after when you ran out of the dance studio because Of course it had to be her. God had blessed her with the perfect genes. The perfect hair, the perfect smile, the perfect body, and she was a way better dancer than you. She was beautiful and you were a colorless painting next to her that lacked detail. You had acne on your forehead, and even if you had ditched the contacts and braces a year prior. Your hair was still frizzy, and your body wasn’t desirable. Your boobs were practically non-existent, your hips were too wide and your stomach wasn’t flat

It sucked because you seriously thought he could’ve been it. He had been it for a while. You pulled back. Curating a home in a fantasy world, caging your heart in. Despite your friends being protective over you like a little sister. Their protection was nothing compared to how locked up you had your heart. That is until you met Kim Namjoon–and that also ended in a disaster. After that you didn’t give a fuck, you let men come and go. Use you for their needs until one night you awoke from your slumber. Sadly it had already been too late.

Jimin was there to repair you brick by brick. He helped you rediscover yourself in more ways than one. He helped you feel comfortable in your body. Something that was so foreign to you it took lots of trial and error. Yet, you broke him.

Despite all the heartbreak you have experienced in your life. This had to be the one that hurt the most, because you hurt him, and nothing you do will ever bring him back to you.

All because you wanted to have the upper hand.

This is why you disliked Kim Namjoon. Just like he brought you back to life he had dulled you at the same time. He made you feel special but at the same time ordinary; and because of him–though it wasn’t his entire fault you were equally to blame–you had lost one of the most important people in your life.

In honor of such event you had been avoiding the world for the entirety of three days. On the fourth day–today–you had finally forced yourself out of bed.

It was your first day of training at your new job which meant you were going to be in the same room with your nemesis AKA your fake fiance. Listening to him brag about how much better he is at everything.

Everything was a shit show.

You purposely took the longer route, hoping it would work calming you down. The Cherry Blossoms were finally blooming, signaling the end of a bitter winter and the birth of a new chapter in your life. You had hoped that Jimin and Taehyung would have been here for the ride, after you explained everything. You didn’t get the chance too and now the two of them were acting as if there wasn’t a decade of memories between the two of you.

Your phone buzzed in the pocket of your hot pink slacks. You weren’t going to be teaching yet, just observing some classes and following Namjoon around while he condescendingly explained what your life would be like as a University Professor.

Are you close? - N

You rolled your eyes at the message. You had been scheduled to come in at ten-thirty. It was ten on the dot and he was already rushing you. You begin to wonder if this is what it was going to be like the entire time the two of you will be together.

Don’t forget to wear your ring, we’re going to mom’s for dinner tonight. - N

The annoyed sigh made its way out of you before you could stop it. You hope that it won’t always be like this. Him making plans for you without consulting you first. Or him outing the relationship is such an irresponsible way without letting you know. If he was going to make every single decision for you, then you will call things off. You had taken the entirety of your night writing down a list of demands in order for you to continue things.

Well it was more of a list of things that annoyed you about him. A list in which you only hoped the two of you could come to a compromise. You don’t want to change him. Mostly because he is stubborn and doesn’t see anything wrong with himself no matter how many times people close to him have mapped it out for him. He won’t turn the other way keeping his ground. All you want to do is meet in the middle for however long he wants to keep this charade up.

One of my TAs  is waiting for you at the front of the building. I’m assuming you know the way. She will show you around and I will meet you for lunch. Don’t be late. - N

The third text came in making you grip your phone tightly in your hand. Even when he wasn’t around he somehow manages to make you want to scream out in anger.

I’m five minutes away.

You reply, putting your phone away and ignoring the last text he sends you. You will not let him ruin your last few minutes of freedom.

Eunseo is amazing.

She immediately greeted you in high spirits and complemented your hot pink blazer and slacks combo. And offered to carry around your bag because to her it seemed too heavy, but you refused.

Despite having attended HYBE U almost a decade ago. It hadn’t changed much. There were a few new buildings to compensate for the enrollment capacity, and a carpark where dorms used to be. But other than those slight changes nothing had changed. Even the large field in between the common hall and the dorms was still the same. The trees always bloomed beautifully in the Spring. Though you couldn’t ignore the pang you felt in your chest while walking through the field with Eunseo as she talked about her classes and how much she looked up to Mr. Kim.

This was where you found out you were in love with Namjoon all those years ago. It was Fall, the foliage was at its peak and the leaves were just starting to fall down. The two of you had decided to meet here instead of the cafe that day to enjoy the weather a little more before it turned gray. There was a particularly strong wind and the leaves came rustling down landing on the two of you making the both of you laugh. The sun was shining in the most perfect way possible, his skin glowed underneath it and something inside of you turned.

That day all you could do was think about him. You fell asleep dreaming about his smile and woke up expecting his scent to cloud over you like a blanket.

It was so beautiful yet tragic and you had never turned back since then.

That is until he turned on you.

With the way Eunseo was describing him. You could almost picture him being the same way he was when he tutored you. According to Eunseo he was funny, kind and really cared about his students. He always went out of his way to explain the material in ways his students could understand, and listened to everybody’s opinion extensively. But he also challenged them and pushed them to work harder.

He loved his job and profession more than anything in the world. It’s something you always did admire about him. Even on late nights or when the stress was too much for him to handle. He always found a way to look at it in a different light. For some time you had wished he would’ve done that with you when you confessed your feelings to him. That night he was someone you had never known. It was like something switched off inside of him and he became the heartless jackass you’ve come to know about in recent years.

“You’re very lucky. He will be such an amazing husband.” Eunseo said bringing out of your long train of thought. You stopped dead in your tracks, surprised as she giggled at your reaction.

“H-How do you know.” You clear your throat, bringing your hand up to your chest and playing with the little aquamarine pendant you never take off.

“He told me before I went down to meet with you.” She shrugs, grabbing onto the straps of her backpack. “Don’t worry he’s only told me and I don’t have many friends to tell. So your secret’s safe with me.” She winks turning around and skipping away.

You shake your head and follow her trying to keep up as best as you can. Maybe wearing heels wasn’t the brightest idea, but it was your first day on the job. You need to make a good impression on your future co-workers. In which you hadn’t met yet, but you assumed it was because Namjoon would be the one to introduce you and he was currently in a lecture.

You jump when you hear your name being called from across the field. You turn around quickly as Namjoon makes his way to you. His beige trench coat blowing in the wind. The combination of his nike’s, light blue jeans, and airy button down shirt was more casual than what you expected. Even his hair wasn’t styled. He looked stress free or a normal person.

“Mr. Kim, I have taken care of her and now I am returning her to you in one piece. Just like you instructed.” Eunseo says from beside you. You look over at her. She’s wearing such a bright smile on her face. Her proudness over such a nimble task makes you chuckle. A moment you will never forget now because it’s made you realize how much you desire to inspire someone.

The same way Namjoon has inspired her.

“Thanks Eunseo.” Namjoon replies once he gets closer, stuffing his hands into the pocket of his coat. He looks you up and down, raising his brows before turning over to his student. “This doesn’t mean you’re getting extra credit or an extension on your next paper.”

“It was worth the shot.” She smiles, sending him finger guns making him laugh. She turns to face you, “It was so nice to meet you Mrs. Kim, I’ll be sure to keep on the lookout for your class next semester.” She says giving you an enthusiastic thumbs up. “I’ll see you in class Mr. Kim.” She finishes before turning around and heading down the path leading to the library.

“She’s not going to turn in her paper on time.” Namjoon says from next to you shaking his head. “But she’s one of my best students. Somehow her papers always manage to impress me even if I threaten to take away a whole letter grade for every late paper. It somehow motivates her to do even better and I can’t.” He sighs and looks over at you. “Did you find everything okay, I’m sorry I couldn’t meet you. I told the office to schedule you after my classes today but they refused. Even being head of a department has very little perks.”

You look around quickly to see if anybody was around. There were a few students making their way to classes but each of them were engrossed with their phones or notes or conversations amongst themselves. They weren’t paying any attention to the two of you. So, he didn’t have to act so nice. “You’re so strange.” You comment, widening your eyes and covering your mouth as quickly as possible.

Namjoon rolls his eyes before sticking his hand out for you to take. “And you’re so nice.” He retaliates. The slight pang of bitterness slicing through his words. You almost feel relieved that he was still in there somewhere.

“Thanks, you bring out the best in me.” You take his hand, watching as he interlaced your fingers with his, forcefully pulling you to walk.

“Whatever, let’s just go to lunch. I’m starving. We can talk about things then.”

Okay you take it back. HYBE U was definitely still not the same.

There was a whole dining hall with the bougiest restaurants that you one hundred percent would not have been able to afford when you were a student here. You assume that’s why it’s pretty empty, except for a few faculty.

Namjoon and you had been sitting in silence since the two of you sat down after ordering. Your mouth almost fell open when you saw an avocado toast for almost twenty dollars. Thankfully Namjoon had offered to pay. Now the two of you were waiting for your overpriced food in complete silence. You weren’t sure what to say if you were honest.

Hey thanks for the job, you're still an asshole though.

Or

My best friends hate me because you ruined my life and now they think that what we have is real because you decided to make it official on Facebook. And like who uses Facebook anyway you old man.

In the end you settle for the nice quiet, listening to the ambience around you until your food arrives. The waiter carefully places your plates in the middle of the table and the two of you quietly thank him. Then Namjoon clears his throat, grabbing your attention.

“I usually bring my own lunch but I like this place whenever I forget to cook.” He cuts the toast in half and puts one of them on your plate, and makes sure you get a piece of avocado too.

“You cook?” You tilt your head to the side, picking up your utensils and poking the soft egg in the middle, letting the yolk run.

Namjoon nods, placing some pasta on your plate. “Jin taught me a couple years ago.” He hands you a napkin and starts filling up his plate. You have no idea who this Jin guy is. Namjoon says his name as if you’re supposed to know already, but you’re curious. Namjoon was a genius but he was a complete incompetent buffoon in the kitchen. You can’t explain how many times you witnessed him and Jungkook fighting in front of you whenever you were over their house because he always burned the simplest things. It would stink up the kitchen and Jungkook would lose it because he always lost at rock paper scissors and ended up being the one to clean the kitchen.

“Who’s Jin?” You wipe your mouth, and take a bite of the pasta humming in delight. Maybe the price of the food was worth it.

“He owns the gym Kook and I go too. He sometimes comes over, you’ll meet him soon.” He clarifies.

You nod, letting the silence consume the two of you once again because what else are you supposed to say. Instead you just take another bite of your food.

Maybe if you prayed hard enough, Jungkook would waltz in and break the awkward air looming between the two of you. Of course you had things to say to him, but how were you supposed to bring it up if the conversation wasn’t going down the route.

“Kook’s mad isn’t he?” Namjoon puts down his fork and takes a sip of his water. “I saw him at the gym last night and he almost beat the shit out of me.” He chuckles like it’s no big deal.

“He’s not the only one.” You retort, reaching into your bag and taking out a sheet of notebook paper in a plastic sleeve and place it on the table. Not the most professional looking thing but you were short on time.

“Lo–” Namjoon starts, you assume he’s going to defend himself and his actions. But he doesn’t get very far because you immediately cut him off.

“No, I understand you want everybody to believe whatever this is.” You say pointing between the two of you. “But there’s not just one person in this act. You can’t keep making choices without consulting me first. The brunch was fine. I was able to come up with something on the spot. But the moving in is not, nor is the fucking Facebook status or telling your student or the dinner we have with your mom tonight.”

Namjoon rolls his eyes, “It’s a stupid status is not a big deal.” He takes a bite of pasta. The nonchalance in his demeanor causes the anger you had somehow managed to push away resurface once again.

“It is a big deal Namjoon. Because of that stupid status, neither Jimin or Taehyung are talking to me. You didn’t give me the chance to tell them and finding out through the internet is a pretty shitty thing.” You try to reason. He pokes his cheek with his tongue and crosses his arms.

“Isn’t Jimin the guy you were with at the party? You two were pretty close.”

“He was my best friend. But because of your actions he’s cut off all communication with me.”

“Maybe it’s a good thing the two of you aren’t friends anymore. He looked pretty comfortable touching you at Taehyung’s place.” He says looking around then you. Yeah, you’re adding this to the list of dumbshit he says. Hopefully by the end of this you’ll be able to publish a whole book.

“Are you listening to yourself?” You say tapping your ears. “You sound so dumb right now.” You shake your head, suddenly losing your appetite. He does bring out the worst in you, and you’re beginning to regret ever saying yes in the first place. “Jimin and I used to fuck and sure things were a little rocky between us since the night of the party. But I still care for him. He's still someone important to me and you’re not respecting that. You outed our relationship to the whole world without consulting me first and you keep doing shit without asking if I am okay with it.”

“It sounds like you’re just looking for someone to blame instead of owning up to whatever you did to your precious Jimin.” He shrugs, digging into his avocado toast. You truly want to dump his iced americano all over his head, but your hushed voices are getting a bit louder and people are starting to take notice.

“You’re completely missing the point. This isn’t about me or Jimin’s relationship. This is about you not willing to see that in order for this to continue you need to include me in big decisions like that. I am my own person Namjoon. I have a life outside of this, and you can’t just expect me to stop it and be at your mercy whenever you need me. What if I had plans tonight?”

“Then you cancel them. This is important.”

“Fucking hell, are you not listening to me. I honestly have no idea how to explain this to you in an easier way or without sounding like a broken record. I’m not a doll Namjoon, you can’t wind me up when you need me. I am a fucking human being and you’re not treating me like one. If this continues I will literally call this whole shit off.”  You pick up your fork and forcefully shove some pasta in your mouth.

“You can’t do that. You promised.” He accuses with his finger, furrowing his brows in anger.

You roll your eyes and swallow. “Just like you, I can also break promises.” You shrug before sliding your forgotten list towards him. “These are my rules, if you can’t follow them then I swear  Namjoon I’ll call your mom and tell her everything, and it would totally suck I mean this job seems to be amazing.” You threaten crossing your arms in front of you.

He huffs, snatching the list from the table and reading them. This time you welcome the silence as you wait for him to finish. After what seems like his third run through he puts the list down again, your bubbly handwriting makes his head hurt a little. He could never understand why you always wrote in colorful pens and marked your i’s with hearts.

In his opinion it was overrated and you were a full grown adult, not a toddler.

“You can’t expect to change me. This isn’t forever.” He says like he’s reminding you. Despite you being his fake fiance he never really assumed you would expect him to remain monogamous. He was still a man with needs and he refused to touch you in that way.

“I’m not asking you too. I’m asking you to meet me in the middle and respect me a little more. I know you hate me but I’m not your biggest fan either. Yet, I agreed to this and I am here.”

He tugs his bottom lip in between his teeth in thought. He stares into his plate of food for what seems like hours. He could do that. Maybe things won’t be so unbearable if the two of you were just walking side by side rather than on opposite ends. He also can’t deny that you’re a little right, this was harder than he assumed. You are definitely not the pliant girl he knew once. Maybe this version of you excites him a little, but of course he won’t ever admit that to anyone. He’s already having a hard time admitting it to himself. If you’re going to ask him to meet you in the middle with your annoying list of demands then he’s going to ask the same of you.

Eye for an eye.

“Fine, but only if you agree to move in with me.”

“That’s ridiculous. I don't understand why I can’t just be at my place. I mean you just said this wasn’t forever.” You mumble.

“Ahh then I guess I’ll just rip this up.” He says taking out your sheet of paper and holding it out in front of him ready to shred it.

You panic and hold your hand out to stop him. “Fuck fine, I’ll move in with you.”

“Perfect, I’ll clear out the guest bedroom this week and you can move in on Saturday.” He smirks, and resumes to his meal.

Once again he’s won, but you will find a way to have the upper hand one of these days. “This is so dumb I still don’t understand your reasoning.”

There’s a part of Namjoon that also doesn’t understand it. That part of him he’s pushed away for years. It’s the part of him that wants you there with him. It’s incredibly selfish. He’s aware he’s asking too much of you already, but he hopes having you in his home will give him an excuse to come home. Lately, he’s been tired of just his plants and artwork receiving him when he gets home.

Yet, that’s something he won’t ever admit out loud either.

“It just makes things easier.” He shrugs, shutting down the conversation. Leaving you to wonder if his actions have more meaning to them than his words.

[aheathen-conceivably]

🎶 When sundown pales the sky, I want to hide a while, behind your smile 🎶

Later that evening once Violette had been tucked into her new bed and Giorgio and Jo had retreated into their own house across the yard, Antoine and Zelda were sitting together under the clear desert sky. With the unobstructed glow of the moon and a sky unclouded by smog, Antoine had never seen a night so bright.

He had dragged some old blankets he found in the spare rooms out onto the nearby field, hoping that the open air would make it easier to tell Zelda what he needed to say. He had made up his mind only moments after Giorgio had told him of their precarious situation: he would tell her everything. No secrets, no silence. Only as he looked at her upturned face, seemingly so rapt with a sight that transported her to another place, the words continued to get caught in his throat: I fucked up, Zelda. It isn’t safe. I was wrong.

She moved his arm around her shoulder and then laid onto his chest, a small movement weighted with such momentary import. The way she rested each of her limbs onto him was filled with such trust, with the simple desire to be as close to him as she possibly could, that it made him realize what a fool he had been. A fool filled with such unnecessary, deep seeded guilt mingled together with self pity and stoicism. It was foolish and isolating and he didn’t want it to ever be the reason he came so close to losing her ever again. 

So he didn’t tell her that he fucked up, or that he was scared or uncertain or guilty. Instead he calmed his breathing and simply told her every last thing that Giorgio had said. 

She moved her weight off of him and pushed away as she looked up at the stars. Antoine’s heart dropped. His limbs twitched and begged him to stand, to storm away and lock the door, to panic that he had brought her and Violette into harm’s way. Then she looked back at him and spoke in a calm voice, “But we aren’t going to lose the farm immediately? You said it’s just a loan, right?”

Antoine let out a sigh of relief and told her, yes. They had a few years. She nodded her head solemnly, the information not seeming to come as a shock at all, "I can look for work. Teaching, shopkeeping. Something.”

“No, Zelda. I’m going out tomorrow. Giorgio told me of some places that are still running. He asked me to talk with you about helping him with the crops, hoping your years in Henford might give him some knowledge of how to do this whole thing.”

A small smile played on her face, lifting so much of the fear from Antoine’s heart he couldn’t even express it, “I knew you two were better off as city boys. Yet here you are playing at being American cowboys or old fashioned homesteaders.”

She reached over and kissed him, then laid down onto the blanket, seemingly uncaring that the red sand swirling near the ground would most likely get tangled in her hair.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m stargazing, city boy. We can figure out the rest tomorrow. Come, lay with me. Forget about it for a while. Look at what you’ve been missing surrounded by blinding lights and city smog your whole life.”

He did as she asked, lying back onto the sand still emanating warmth from the sun of the day. Laying there with her surrounded by the croaking of frogs and clear starlight, he realized that she was right, and for the first time in his life, he did forget.

[bucky-fricking-barnes]

Like Breathing - One

Title: Like Breathing

Word Count: 3.2k

Part Warnings: Dead and injured animals, killing animals, blood, harassment, and stitching up wounds

Summary: Bucky’s life in Cove is far from perfect, mostly because Cove’s residents want nothing more than to scare him away. Luckily for you, Bucky isn’t easily scared off.

A/N: This is the first part of Like Breathing. I hope you enjoy! As always, thank you for reading. Please let me know what you think! Dividers by @firefly-graphics​​

Translations:

Маленький = Little one

Like Breathing Masterlist

Bucky didn’t kill anymore. His therapist reminded him of that daily, which he loathed, but he still nodded along every time she said it. Of course, it wasn’t true. Bucky had killed yesterday.

The sleepy little town he had been placed in as part of his pardon was practically idyllic. Neatly trimmed lawns lined litter-free streets, and each afternoon when the schools let out, children rode their bicycles up and down the sidewalks. They played ball in the cul-de-sac and Bucky swore that one afternoon he’d even seen an ice cream truck turn the corner west of his house. The ranch-style, one bedroom home had been loaned to him by the FBI. It wasn’t something Bucky would have picked on his own, but Steve had reassured him that once he got his bearings, he could decorate it to feel more like his own place. Bucky had not done that. Everything was exactly as it was the day he moved in—basic furniture with no decor. The only personal items he kept were his clothes, a small box containing pictures and other items sent to him by the Smithsonian, and his laptop, which was also given to him by the FBI. It was most likely bugged, just like the house and the phone. The majority of the items in the house were either already there when he moved in or things he’d purchased for Alpine. Bucky always thought of those as her personal items, not his. She was the only other living being that had ever been in his house. Not even Steve had come to visit.

In the four months he’d lived in Cove, he had limited his interactions to the soft-spoken volunteer at the animal shelter and the older woman who manned the register at the pet store. Both of them had been instrumental when he adopted Alpine, a soft white cat who’d been surrendered to the shelter after she’d hissed at the previous owner’s kids. Bucky didn’t think that was a good enough reason to get rid of a pet. He hadn’t planned on getting a cat, or any kind of animal for that matter, but after his therapist suggested it, Bucky hadn’t been able to get the idea out of his head. It turned out that while Alpine had more attitude than Steve, she was affectionate when he needed it. Other than that, she preferred to keep her distance the majority of the time. She was welcome company while Bucky worked each day.

Laughter and jeering from his front yard drew Bucky’s attention from where he’d been reviewing surveillance data on the bugged laptop. He sighed and got up from the kitchen table, pushing his chair back and ignoring the screech it made as the legs scraped across the old linoleum. Alpine darted out from underneath the table at the sound, sprinting down the hall to the safety of the bedroom, just as she did every day at this hour.

As he trudged through the living room, Bucky didn’t have to wonder what was waiting for him when he opened the front door. Every time it was the same: a pickup speeding off with men teetering in the bed and some form of roadkill bleeding out on the sidewalk in front of his house. His stretch of sidewalk was the only one that kids never played on, and for good reason. The brown stains left by months worth of dead animals never seemed to go away, no matter how much Bucky scrubbed.

Jaw clenched, Bucky grabbed the bucket of tools from just inside the door and headed down to the front of his yard. The deer was young, practically still a fawn, and his chest tightened at the sight. Its chest rose and fell unsteadily and the panicked look in his eyes was all too familiar.

Slowly, Bucky knelt down beside the frightened animal, his back to the street. “I’m not gonna hurt you,” he soothed. 

The animal had been hit by a car—he’d seen these wounds plenty of times—and there was little chance it would survive. Most likely, it would bleed out excruciatingly slow on the sidewalk as the sun sank below the horizon.

“Let’s get you into the backyard, huh? It’s okay.” He kept his voice soft and even as he spoke to it, explaining what he was doing. He knew it couldn’t understand him, but after months of practice, he knew that talking to them kept them calm and kept him from getting a hoof or claw to the face.

Bucky unfolded the tarp from the five-gallon bucket and carefully manipulated the poor animal onto the plastic. Dragging it across the yard to the back of the house was easy, and when it was situated with the forest in view, Bucky left it to get his bucket of tools.

He hated every minute of this ordeal. Sometimes the animals were already dead. Those were the good days. He could simply haul the animal into the woods and leave it for the scavengers. This kind of animal, the ones that were left to suffer in plain view of his living room, were the cases he hated. His nightmares were plagued with them now, their whimpers interspersed with those of his victims long ago.

The most humane thing Bucky could do in situations like these was to put the animal down himself. The first time the creature had still been alive when the men had dumped it, Bucky had attempted to take the animal to the emergency vet less than a mile away. He’d been turned away at the door. The police were no help either, as the sheriff was almost always seated in the back of the pickup. He’d tipped his hat at Bucky one day while they sped away. Bucky had punched a hole in the living room wall.

“You’ll feel better soon,” Bucky said, eyeing the deer as he loaded what he would need into his waistband.

He dragged the tarp into the woods, into the clearing near the meadow. The young deer lifted its head, its longing for the rolling waves of grass and wildflowers clear as it groaned and settled back on the forest floor. Blood slicked over the blue plastic tarp beneath it and Bucky looked away, readying his weapon.

“I’m sorry,” he finally whispered. He looked away as he pulled the trigger. The familiar sound of the silenced gunshot didn’t phase him, and Bucky quickly cleaned up the remains, leaving them for the scavengers once he’d removed the bullet.

After hosing down his equipment and leaving it in the garage to dry, Bucky grabbed a bucket of soapy water and the stiff-bristled brush he used to scrub the sidewalk. He stepped out of the garage, but froze almost immediately.

Another animal had been left in the deer’s place, this time significantly smaller in stature. Bucky glanced back at his drying tools, then set his cleaning bucket down on the driveway. Water sloshed over the side onto the asphalt but he ignored it. In just a few long strides, Bucky knelt down at the animal’s side.

The cat’s fur was matted with blood and it whined pitifully as soon as he was within earshot, but when Bucky reached out to touch it, it hissed and tried to scramble away.

“Hey, I ain’t gonna hurt you. It’s okay.”

A flash of white made Bucky pause. He blinked and Alpine was between him and the other cat, her tail aloft as she stuck her curious nose in the injured feline’s face.

“Alpine, leave them alone!” Bucky scolded. “How did you even get out here?”

Alpine simply ignored him and moved to investigate the other animal further. He looked around, spotting the front door open. He must’ve forgotten to close it and Bucky inwardly kicked himself for making such a stupid mistake. It was usually more about what—or who—could get in his house than what could get out.

Sighing, Bucky reached out to pick up his cat. She obliged his touch, affectionately rubbing her head against his hand when he was close enough. The cat laying on the sidewalk watched Alpine intently as Bucky scratched behind her ears, then scooped her up and carried her back up the driveway and into the house. He shut the front door behind her, then went back to the injured animal’s side.

“You gonna let me help you now?” Bucky asked, keeping his voice soft. “Huh?” He reached out a hand and though the cat tensed, he was able to smooth back the matted fur to find the injury.

The cat had a long cut stretching down its right hind leg, from the hip all the way down to the paw. The blood had already begun to clot, which was a good sign, but it was still a cause for concern. If he jostled the animal too much, they could begin to bleed again. 

“You really got into some trouble there, didn’t you?” As if to reply, the cat meowed and laid its head down on the stained concrete. It still watched him, but it had relaxed and Bucky felt a bit more confident in his ability to move it into the house where he could stitch up its leg. 

“Alright, I’m gonna pick you up. I promise I’ll be as gentle as I can,” he said. He continued to softly narrate his actions as he lifted the cat and held it against his chest, then went into the house through the garage. He jabbed his metal thumb into the button beside the door so that the garage would shut behind him, just in case Alpine decided she wanted to do any more adventuring today.

Alpine, true to form, was waiting for him when he stepped inside the house. She immediately started weaving around his feet, and Bucky would’ve tripped over her if he wasn’t as agile.

“Careful, sweetheart. We gotta be nice to our guest,” he chided when she jumped up on the table. Bucky set the cat down on top of the newspaper he’d left spread out during his research earlier that day. He could get a new copy later if he needed to. Right now his priority was to clean and stitch up the cat’s wound. 

After an hour of work, the injured cat had a freshly shaved leg with a freshly cleaned and stitched wound. She had, surprisingly, stayed still and quiet for the majority of the time, only watching Bucky with wide, frightened eyes. He’d discovered that the cat was a girl partway through, which had been more of a relief than anything. Alpine had taken quite a liking to the new animal. Maybe once the animal healed, his little friend could have a friend of her own, given that nobody came looking for her. Friends he could handle, but kittens were a whole other story.

Bucky shook his head as he went back to cleaning up the table. It was a methodical task, one he could appreciate, but he kept glancing back over his shoulder to check on the cat, who’d fallen asleep shortly after he’d finished. He’d set her up near the litter box, and he’d moved the food and water a bit closer so that she wouldn’t be walking as far on the injured leg. Alpine had curled up for a nap of her own on the floor nearby.

When you woke, it took you a second to remember where you were and what had happened. It wasn’t the first time you’d woken up in a strange house in your feline form, but the injured leg and the fluffy white cat snoozing nearby were a first. Rarely did you ever get hurt. Usually the wound healed well enough on its own, but the trauma from being grabbed by the strange man with the grubby hands and then being tossed off the back of the pickup had exacerbated the cut and your healing had come to a halt.

You’d been wary of the dark-haired man who’d found you. He’d had an aura of shame and fear about him, and you’d immediately recoiled. Then, the little white cat had appeared out of nowhere. She was his cat, she’d said in so many words, and the man was good. He fed her, played with her, and the house was warm and safe. You’d relented and taken a good look at him. Warmth had settled into your bones despite your injury and your gut had told you that the white cat was telling the truth. The man with the metal arm was good.

He had carried you inside, cradling you against his chest with the gentlest of touches. He seemed to know what he was doing as he fixed up your leg. At some point after he’d tended to the gash, you’d passed out from the pain and exhaustion.

Now, you were in a soft bed on the floor of his laundry room. You slowly uncurled and managed to prop yourself up without putting too much weight on your injured leg. You had to be careful—if it didn’t heal right, you could get stuck in this form forever, or your human form could suffer the effects of the injury as well.

Alpine lifted her head and blinked sleepily when she sensed your movement.

You’re awake.

“How long has it been since I passed out?” you asked.

She looked towards the back door, where the night sky was visible through several small panes of glass. Only a few hours.

A shout from upstairs made you jump, and Alpine was off like a shot. She raced out of the laundry room through the kitchen, and you heard her scramble down the hall. Another shout piqued your curiosity and you limped after her. Whimpers and a heavy sob were enough of a trail for you to follow.

The man was sitting on the edge of the bed, Alpine clutched against him and his face buried in her fur. He cried as you cautiously hobbled into the bedroom, sticking to the shadows along the walls. Your fur wasn’t dark enough to hide you completely, but it would keep you hidden long enough for you to judge the situation.

Alpine purred soothingly and you listened to the man cry as you looked around the room. The top of the dresser and the nightstand were empty except for a small digital clock and the man’s charging phone. Every space in the house, from what you’d seen, was strangely barren. There was nothing personal to tell you about your rescuer, and while that should have made you uneasy, it only made the sad pit in your stomach grow deeper.

You let out a quiet whimper when a twinge ran down your leg and the man stiffened. He lifted his head from Alpine’s fur and peered around the room.

“Маленький?” he murmured. “Is that you?”

Hesitantly, you crept away from the wall and into the dim light coming from the moon outside. You knew your eyes would glint in the light and he’d be able to find you easier that way. 

Just as you’d suspected, the man’s attention snapped to you as soon as you were in the light. He set Alpine down on the bed and carefully knelt on the hardwood floor, his hand trembling as he reached out to you.

“You shouldn’t be up and moving around so soon,” he chided, and you meowed in irritation.

He hovers, Alpine said from her perch on the bed. You glanced up at her. When he’s worried, he hovers. When he’s scared, he hovers.

You let the man brush his fingers against your fur. He exhaled shakily and you stepped closer until he could run his hand over your back. The feeling was sublime and you arched under his touch. It had been so long since someone had touched you with such gentleness and care, and you knew then that you were a goner. You’d stay with this man for as long as you could.

“Thank you for saving me,” you told him, though you knew he couldn’t understand you in this form. 

The man smiled a little. It didn’t reach his eyes, but he seemed to appreciate the tidbit of interaction you’d given him. In response, you bumped your head against his knee, rubbing against the soft fabric of his pajamas.

“I wonder if you’ve got a name or an owner out there,” he mused. He continued to pet you as you rubbed against his legs. Eventually, you stood still and peered up at Alpine, who had settled with her tail just over the edge of the mattress. She twitched it, knowing you could see, and you narrowed your eyes at her challenge. Alpine was a young cat, and though she was sweet and naive enough to believe that you were just like her, you sensed an air of playfulness and spice about her.

Noticing your change in focus, the man scooped you up and lifted you onto the bed. You wobbled a little on the mattress before batting at Alpine. She flipped over to play and you indulged her, playing as much as you could without putting the health of your leg in jeopardy.

“What’s the man’s name?” you asked, dodging her paw.

Alpine chirped back at you. Bucky, she said. That’s what the men on the phone always call him.

“The men on the phone?” 

They call almost every day. He likes some of them. The others make him sad and angry.

You filed that information away for later use, and you were reaching out to block Alpine’s paw again when Bucky picked her up. He shifted her up near his pillow, then reached for you. On instinct, you backed away, your ears flattening when the metal of his arm glinted in the moonlight filtering in through the window.

“Hey, pretty girl,” Bucky soothed. “I won’t hurt you, remember?”

Another twinge of pain shot up your leg to your hip. You let out a sharp yelp when it twitched and hit the bedpost. Instantly, Bucky’s forehead creased in concern and he eased his flesh hand between your back and the wooden post.

“Easy now. I don’t want you falling off or hurting yourself more. You wanna get down off the bed? Is that what you want?”

You let out a slow breath and stared at him, forcing yourself to relax. You looked down at the floor and then at him in hopes that he would take that as a ‘yes’. When Bucky reached out and moved to pick you up again, you let him. He lowered you down onto the floor without another word. You scooted underneath the bed, closing your eyes when the feeling of being sheltered and safe settled into your bones. 

“She’ll be okay, Alpine.”

Bucky’s voice was barely audible in the silence under the bed and you peeked open an eye, listening.

“She’s gotta be.”

Thank you for reading! If you liked this, please consider reblogging my work so that others can enjoy it too.

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Forever: @aya-fay​​

Bucky Barnes: @lipstickandvibranium​​ @valhalla-kristin​​ @buckymcbuckbarnes​​

Series: @almosttoopizza​​

[frenchfrywrites]

Testing the Waters: An Examination and Exploration into the Devildom Demon’s Hierarchy of Status

MINORS DNI

Warnings: GN amab dom reader, sub demon brothers, brothers have ambiguous genitals, established polyamory (NO demoncest), culture shock, lots and lots of piss and wetting!!! Piss drinking, wetting clothes, marking with piss, involuntary wetting, etc!!, brat characters, nonverbal subspace, subspace, the demon bros have animalistic traits, implied sex, sir kink, assertion of dominance, safe sane + consensual, d/s scenes

This was a commission for @rosepetalhaven !! I had soo much fun with writing this (im sure u can tell bc i went 1k words over what you asked for.. teehee 😇), and while it's super different from how I normally write fics, I hope you enjoy it :D

You’re not sure when it started. You’re not sure with whom it started with, either. You do know a few things, though: that Belphegor wasn’t the first to do it, but he was the one that made you realize there was a pattern occurring. 

The incident happened days ago, and you have been replaying it in your mind ever since. He’d plopped down on top of you while you sat in your room, and sprawled himself over your body, trying to sleep on you like you were a giant pillow. Typically, you enjoy napping with the avatar of sloth, but you had an important task that needed finishing (and now you can’t even remember what it was that was so pressing, it seems so minuscule compared to what was about to happen next). Belphie had whined, using a very small amount of force to push you back when you’d tried to move from under him.

“Belphie,” you had stressed lightly. 

“Noo, don’t move,” he’d huffed. You tried again to move from under him, and then it happened. Belphie had wet himself on top of you. 

Several emotions worked through your mind then, surprise, shock, bewilderment, and a bit of delight. The two of you stared at one another for a very long moment, Belphie looking both smug and sleepy, while you stared back with a very “deer caught in the headlights” look. 

“It’s okay,” you choked out, even though Belphie didn’t seem upset in the slightest. "It's okay," and perhaps you were only talking to yourself at this point, reassuring yourself that this was normal– even though it very much was not.

Once the cooled wetness on your lap became hard to ignore, you’d then manhandled Belphie off your body and got up to change, not bothering to listen as he complained and whined about your absence. 

You could not get the moment out of your head.

It dawned on you that this was not the first time a demon had wet themselves on you.

Your mind worked a mile a minute to find evidence for a pattern– as human brains are wont to do– and while you couldn’t remember when it started, you came up with a couple of times this had occurred before.

There was the time when Mammon wanted something, and he’d been begging for you to get it for him, or at the very least loan him the money for it. While you often indulge him, you’d told him no then, and he grabbed the front of your shirt, looking at you with big puppy eyes before relieving himself on you. 

There was the time that Lucifer ordered you not to meet up with Solomon late at night; he’d pressed himself up against you, holding your arm tightly, practically pouting. Eventually, you caved, and you hadn’t noticed it until he pulled away that there was a slight wet spot on the front of your pants from where his crotch had pressed against you.

There was the time that Asmo sat on your lap and cutely demanded you to do something with him, because he was dying of boredom. When you’d rejected him in favor of something else, he had promptly wet himself. That time you assumed it was him being bratty from being ignored, but you now realize he had different intentions.

You came up with a dozen or so times this had occurred, and it finally clicked. Each brother had done this when they’d try to demand or command something. It had to be a dominance thing. It was failing horribly, of course, but now that you were aware of the situation at hand, things were going to change. 

Deciding to get a bit more information, you crack open the demonology book you’d gotten from class for the first time in ages. There you find all the answers you need. Your assumption is proven correct, as the textbook spells out in detail how urine is often used as a hierarchical device for demons. As you read, you discover how, if one backs down and submits to the other, that they will involuntarily wet themselves as a show of submission. You imagine you’ve been disappointing the brothers when you fail to follow through on the other half of the societal expectation. 

It’s hard to stop the images of your partners losing their self-control as they submit to you; wetting themselves, because they just can’t help it. You can’t ignore how flushed and excited you get from thinking about it. 

-

The first demon you think of is Mammon.

Mammon is, as he is so frequent to remind you, the first you made a pact with, and so it’s only fair that he’s the first one that you decide to put your new knowledge to the test.

He makes it so easy, too. 

He’s in your room, rummaging through your things when you enter. 

“If you’re looking through my dirty laundry, you might as well clean it,” you tease, closing the door behind him, startling him lightly.

“Whaaat?” he turns around looking indigent, “why would I do your chores? You should be the one doing mine! I’m the great Mammon, and you’re a weak human, in case ya forgot. I’m not gonna do anythin’ for you” He could go on ranting, but he’s cut off by the sound of you unbuckling your belt. “What’re ya doin’?” 

You don’t answer him, and instead step closer. He chokes on his spit when you take your cock out of your pants. 

“Oh,” he starts again, putting two and two together. It takes you a moment to convince your body and brain that it’s alright to do what you’re about to do. Then, you’re pissing on him. 

To your surprise and delight, Mammon’s knees buckle as he immediately loses control of his bladder. He falls to the ground, sitting unbothered in a puddle of his own pee, letting yours wash over him. You moan, feeling your loins burn at the sight of him. It's hard to keep yourself flaccid.

Mammon's hands clutch his thighs, keeping him steady as he experiences something that must be downright euphoric if his dazed expression is anything to go by. Luckily this isn't the first time he's looked at you with eyes like that, and you know how to handle the situation.

“Aw, don’t have much to say now, do you?” you coo, bringing a hand down to brush his wet hair from his face. Mammon only purrs and chirps in response, blinking sleepily up at you. You pet his face tenderly, “want me to take care of you?” 

Mammon nods slowly in response to your question, his pupils blown wide. You coo, taking him up into your arms, and helping him onto your bed. 

He’s so cute like this, you can hardly stand it. It makes you regret that it took you so long to figure all this out.

-

Satan is next, and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t manipulate the situation a bit. You made sure to drink a good amount of water before you sought out the Avatar of Wrath. 

You knock on his door, hearing a faint “who is it?” come from within. Your heart rate picks up as you reply with your name. Satan quickly responds with a, “come in” and your hand is already on the doorknob. 

His room is chaotic and messy, as it usually is, which is good for your plan. Satan looks up from the tome he’s reading, smiling at the sight of you. 

As you attempt to walk over to him, you trip over a book (and yeah, you make it more dramatic than it needs to be, but whatever). You steady and collect yourself before Satan is up and on his way to you, eager to help. 

“Sorry,” he sighs, taking the book you tripped on from your hands.

“You should clean this place up,” you suggest, only it’s not so much of a suggestion as it is a command. Satan shrugs,

“I’ll get to it,” he says, brushing you off. You harden your gaze,

“I wasn’t asking,” you remind him. A light flush begins to work itself onto Satan’s now irritated face.

“Excuse me-” he begins, but grows quiet when you take yourself out of your pants. It still takes a millisecond to convince your brain that your body is allowed to pee, and then you’re wetting his pants for him. “Ah,” he breathes, looking down at your stream in awe, his eyelids lowering as he begins to involuntarily wet himself. All anger has left his body, and he melts like wax under a flame as you make a mess of his pants and floor. 

“I see you worked it all out then,” he purrs once you’re both done, giving you a dopey smile. You kiss him gently, 

“Yeah. And you’re going to clean up this mess, along with your room. Isn’t that right?” He nods immediately, letting out another spurt of pee at your assertion of dominance. 

“Yes sir,” you’re shocked– but try not to show it– when he then drops to his hands and knees and begins licking up the puddle of yours and his piss from the ground. 

“Fuck,” you sigh softly, “good boy,” you praise, not sure if he can even hear you, with how quietly you’re speaking. 

Diligently, Satan takes care of the mess then looks up at you, licking his lips before giving you a small smile. You let out an appreciative hum,

“Good, now,” you break eye contact to look around the room, “this better be tidied next time I come in here.” Satan makes a pleased sound at the promise that you’ll be back. 

You turn, but before you can leave, Satan calls out your name quietly. 

“Will you take care of me, if I do a good job?” he asks, his hands griping his thighs, and you’d have to be blind to not see how aroused he is. 

“Yes sweetheart,” you smile as you look him over, “I will,” and with that you leave the room, already counting down the seconds before you return.

-

A couple of days later, Belphie has overslept, and Lucifer put you in charge of waking him. You make your way up to his room, while everyone eats breakfast. He’s dead asleep when you open the door, and you sigh, knowing you have a fight ahead of you. 

“Belphie,” you don’t bother with being quiet, because you know Beel has already tried and failed with waking him nicely. You shake him gently, and finally he blinks his eyes open, moaning as he groggily rises from his deep slumber. 

“Ugh, ten more minutes,” he groans, batting away your hands. You’re about to start badgering him again, but an idea hits you. You pull down your pants enough to pull your cock out, and aim it at his face. It takes you a moment, but you manage to pee a little on Belphies face. He gasps, a bit getting into his mouth at the action, and soon a wet spot forms on the comforter, signalling that he’s involuntarily wet the bed. 

“Okay,” he whines, wiping your piss off his face so he can look up at you, “I’ll um… go take a shower,” he mumbles, rising up from the bed. 

“I’ll throw your sheets in the wash,” you compromise, stopping him from leaving, so you can kiss his sticky cheek. Belphie purrs at the action, leaning into your touch. 

“‘M glad you finally figured all this out,” he sighs happily, “took you long enough,” he teases. You huff, and push him towards the bathroom then tuck yourself back into your pants, and begin stripping the sheets. 

-

Sometimes you forget how Leviathan can be such a brat. He’s very good at reminding you though.

“Levi, darling, when was the last time you… washed yourself with soap and water,” you ask, trying to be delicate about the fact that you’re not sure that he’s been taking care of himself very well these last few days. 

“I don’t need to,” he replies, mashing away at the buttons on his keyboard, not sparing you a glance.

“Mmm, I’m not so sure, I think you probably should every once in a while,” you say, trying your best to persuade him.

“Not. Right. Now,” he urges, frustration evident in his voice. 

“Levi,” you strain, and then realize there’s an easy way to win this fight. You drop your pants, and lean over to press the pause button.

“Hey!” Levi whips his head around, but whatever he was going to say gets swallowed as he comes face to face with your dick. 

“Oh,” he scrambles out of his chair, his expression of annoyance easily shifting to one of surprise and excitement. “Here, here,” he says as he grabs your arm and drags you away from his electronics. You don’t give him much time after that, pissing on him without warning.

“Ah-I can’t hold it,” Levi’s voice quivers when he says it, looking at you with wide, wild eyes as he loses control of his bladder. He’s still holding onto your arm, and his grip tightens significantly as he lets go.

“S’okay,” you reassure, “you didn’t do anything wrong, I’m very pleased with you Levia-chan, my sweet baby, doing so good,” you praise until a soft purr erupts from him. His grip loosens, but he still clings to you, falling into you. Luckily you have the wherewithal to catch him and hold him gently in your arms. He’s still wetting himself as you hold him, but you don’t mind at all. 

It’s not until he’s finally done that he speaks again. 

“What a mean way of making me want to shower,” he pouts, still purring. You laugh, 

“I promise I’ll make it up to you, okay?” he nods, and lets you pick him up, so you can get the two of you cleaned up. 

-

It’s not unusual for you to wake up in the middle of night in desperate need of a glass of water. It happens more often these days, because you’re emptying your bladder (and filling it) more than usual. 

Tonight, you see the light in Lucifer’s study on your way back from the kitchen. You gravitate towards it like a moth to a flame. Lucifer’s head snaps up when you enter the room, sighing when he sees it’s just you and not one of his brothers. 

“You should be in bed,” you recommend. Lucifer lets out a tired laugh, 

“I’ve got too much to do,” he explains, like that’s a valid excuse. You get straight to the point with him, ending up next to his desk chair with a couple of strides. 

Lucifer looks up at you, perplexed by what you’re doing. You’ve gotten very comfortable with what you’re about to do, and without an ounce of shame, you pull down your sleep pants and take out your cock. A soft noise comes from Lucifer at the sight of you, his eyes flickering from it to your face, then back down again. 

Since you’ve done this many times now, you are able to relieve yourself with ease; the glass of water from earlier helps. 

As soon as your pee hits his body Lucifer gasps softly, then moans– an even more quiet sound– and he too, involuntarily, wets himself on his desk chair. 

Once your stream ends, you shake yourself off, and tuck yourself back into your pants. 

“Bed now?” you prompt, your voice low and soothing. Lucifer nods,

“Yes, alright,” he slowly stands, on shaky legs. You help him up, winding an arm around his waist. Lucifer leans into your touch, so much more pliant than you’ve ever seen him before, docile and malleable for you. 

“I’ll clean up your office tomorrow,” you promise as you lead him to his bedroom. “First though,” you lean in, kissing his neck gently, and smiling when he chirps happily from the action, “let me clean you up.”

-

Rather than needing to be put in his place, Asmodeous is the one who approaches you. He knocks on your door, and when you give him the go ahead to come in, he practically bounces into your room. Flopping on your bed with a delighted grin, he makes himself comfortable next to you.

“A little birdy told me you figured out how our hierarchy works,” he hums, twirling a lock of hair around his finger. You laugh, wondering who must have told him.

“I suppose I did,” you confirm, already getting a sense of where this conversation may be headed. Asmo’s grin widens,

“It was sooo weird when you were all clueless. Kind of cute, but kind of annoying,” he giggles. There’s a moment of silence between the two of you, then Asmo giggles again, and a light blush dusts his cheeks. 

“Did you want me to make it up to you?” you ask, because it seems like he doesn’t have the words for what he wants yet. “Now that I know better?” Asmo beams, delighted that you’re already taking the lead,

“Yes!” he reaches out to clutch onto your shirt, “oh yes! Please?” you smile, because he looks too cute laying on your bed, all excited and willing.

You slowly pull the hem of your pants down, just enough to free your cock. Asmo whines at the sight of it, squirming a bit, and rubbing his legs together. You then pull down his pants, and tuck yourself inside, to make sure he’ll get really wet. 

Asmo trills, clinging to you tighter, writhing with anticipation. You almost want to make him wait longer, but he’s already been so brave and good, coming to you and asking so sweetly. When you start to pee, Asmo moans openly, nuzzling his face into your neck. He starts licking at your pulse point when he too wets himself. Your bed is going to be a mess, but that’s the least of your cares right now.

“Thank you, thank you,” Asmo murmurs softly, tickling you as his lips move against your neck. 

You run your fingers through his hair gently, “we have to get cleaned up,” you remind him softly. Asmo whines,

“Okaaay,” he relents, because he couldn’t possibly deny you after all that. Laughing lightly, you take yourself out of his pants,

“I’m surprised you’d want to sit in this cold, wet, mess.” Asmo huffs, unlatching himself from you just enough for him to look at you properly.

“It doesn’t bother me, I literally asked for it,” you laugh again, because he’s right. And you think he might be asking for it a lot now that he’s had a taste of it.

-

Having to assert dominance over Beelzebub was honestly unprecedented. He is really so easy going and submissive for you a majority of the time. It shocked you when he huffed and shook his head when you kindly requested if he went grocery shopping with you.

“What,” you pause, shaking your head a bit, and smiling at how silly he’s being, “what was that?”

“I don’t wanna go help you,” he huffs, but he’s looking at you like it’s killing him to deny you. You smile to yourself as it clicks that you know exactly what it is that he wants. 

“Ah,” you step into his personal space and Beel can’t help but smile, squeezing his fists into balls, then releasing them as energy courses through his body. 

You unzip your pants, pulling yourself out of them, as you’ve now done so many times before. He’s already purring, looking at your cock longingly, waiting patiently for what is to come. 

Beel doesn’t have to wait for long. Your piss comes, and Beel’s hands reach out to touch your stream. He practically falls into you, knocking his head against your shoulder, still so consumed with watching you.

“Oh Beel,” you coo softly when he begins to wet himself as well. You reach a hand up to pet his head affectionately. 

He brings his wet fingers up to his mouth, sucking your pee off of them. 

“Thank you,” he mumbles from around his fingers, as soon as he finishes. “Feels good,” he hums, rubbing his thighs together. 

“I’ll bet it does,” you hum, kissing his skin lovingly. There’s a moment of comfortable quiet between the two of you before he breaks it by saying,

“Let me change, and I’ll come with you.” You laugh, kissing him again,

“Good boy,” you praise, and smack his ass gently when he turns to leave. 

You can tell by the way that the tips of his ears burn a bright red that he’s smiling to himself as he leaves. 

[taralen]

Thoughts in Reflection

A prequel to an INBOX Story idea proposed by @clowny-rolls (Thanks for the idea!!!)

NOTE: This story won't make as much sense unless you read the stuff I wrote here for better context: Click Me.

The illustration is inspired by a drawing a friend of mine did of Spamton, but it's currently not uploaded anywhere. Sorry guys. 😭

The year was 1994.

Spamton G. Spamton, a former Addison and a now esteemed entrepreneurial businessman who founded BIG SHOT AUTOS was one day asked, "Mr. Spamton, are you seeing anyone?"

Much to Spamton's chagrin, the one asking was his close friend Bant, a Blue Addison who was the only one of his former friends and coworkers with whom he stayed in contact. He leaned against the wall, waiting for any chance to talk to Spamton once he was off the phone.

Spamton rolled his eyes. "Why are you asking?"

"You haven't seen any ladies, have you? I figured with your newfound success, the women would be flocking to you." Bant chuckled.

Spamton raised his hand and dismissed this with a gesture. "I'm too busy."

"Not too busy for me, though." Bant smirked.

Spamton froze and his cheeks flushed pink.

Bant tilted his head, flashing that iconic closed-eye Addison grin. "Hey, if you're interested, one of the restaurants Sen's been running fliers for is setting up blind dates. I've been the one coordinating things to bring people together. The restaurant has had a nice uptick in business since! The campaign is running for another week. It might be kind of fun to try it out. I can set you up with a cute girl, exactly your type!"

Spamton narrowed his eyes at the mention of Sen, or Yahoosen, the Yellow Addison he once worked so closely with but did not believe in his vision. Hearing Bant's involvement softened his expression but not his demeanor. "That sounds stupid. How will this benefit me at all?"

"If you have a good time, you could leave them a good review, and then I can convince the owner to vouch for your shop whenever they need a new car or some fixing. What do you think?" Bant's smile widened.

Spamton raised a brow. "Uh, give me a moment. Step out of my office for a bit."

Bant sighed. "What for?"

"I need to make a call, obviously!" Spamton said as he sat down at his desk with his finger already on the dial.

Bant huffed and pushed off the wall. "Fine. Let me know when you're done." He slipped out, closed the door behind him, and paced the hall. Although he was just outside the office, he could not hear what Spamton was talking about. Thankfully, the call was brief, and only a few moments later, Spamton opened the door, looking up at Bant. "OKAY. I will do it!" He adjusted his collar and flashed a handsome, toothy smile.

Bant blinked. "Huh? Really? Did whoever you were talking to on the phone tell you it was a good idea?" He laughed a little awkwardly.

"Huh?! Why would I ask my esteemed business partner about something so silly?" Spamton laughed, dismissively waving his hand. "Go on! Set me up with this blind date! I trust you know my tastes in women well."

Bant furrowed his brows. Having known Spamton for years, he knew when he wasn't totally genuine, and this seemed to be one of those moments, but he smiled anyway. "Okay, I will. I'm sure not to disappoint you!" ☎️☎️☎️

Waiting in a hallway near the restrooms was a small lady, a White Addison. She wore a silken pink dress far too expensive for her salary and tied her hair up in a matching pink bow. People passing by stared at her, whispering words she did not want to hear.

Bant approached her. "Ah, Ms. Thetalan, you look quite lovely. That dress Orvar loaned you fits you nicely!"

Orvar, short for Orvarstok, was an Orange Addison who worked with Bant. He advertised clothing curated by Queen herself, ranging from everyday wear to fine garments. Through their established trust, Bant easily convinced him to loan a dress on the promise he'd foot the dry-cleaning bills afterward.

She turned to the Blue Addison and smiled meekly. "You think so? I hope he likes it, too."

"He definitely will. You are exactly his type." Bant winked. "He is an esteemed businessman, so he has fine tastes. He should be here within the next five to ten minutes. Just wait here for now."

"Fine tastes?" She blushed. "Okay. I will wait right here," she answered meekly. She watched him disappear down the corner. She was certain this guy was the same Blue Addison she saw with that man she fell in love with a year ago—a man who appeared to be a White Addison like her but with black hair. She etched his name into her heart: Spamton G. Spamton.

Despite her suspicions, Thetalan didn't dare pry too much about the Blue Addison's possible relations. He approached her directly while she was walking down the street and asked if she would like to participate in a blind date with all the expenses paid to support a local restaurant. Usually, she'd be wary of such things, but because of his familiarity, her intuition told her to trust him and take on this offer. She told him about the kind of man she wanted to meet, and he said, "Ah, perfect. I know just the guy for you! He is a handsome businessman and not too unlike an Addison." He raised his head and pointed at his own nose. "What, with one of these just like us!"

Few Darkners chose to court Addisons outside of work-related reasons, but this Blue Addison described someone so specific that she could only think of one person, and it was him. To have this opportunity of seeing Spamton again... It made her tremble with excitement.

With bated breath, she gazed into the nearby mirror, trying to collect herself. Though she was excited, anxiety swarmed her entire being. She hadn't seen this man since last year and wondered if he remembered her. He occupied her mind constantly, and as she stared into her beautified reflection, her hands wringing restlessly, she thought, "He has no idea how much I wish he could see me."

(To be continued...)

[mountttmase]

A Mountain To Climb: The Sequel

Chapter Six

Note - I’m sorry but how are we halfway through already that’s nuts to me. But yes I hope you like this one and feedback would be appreciated 🩷

Pairing - Mason Mount × Reader

Word count - 6.4k

Warnings - series will contain fluff, smut and angst

Masterlist

The good thing about Mason having a game on a Sunday meant he you were free to see each other on Friday nights. You took it in turns whenever they popped up and this time he was at yours, currently in a food coma on your sofa as you took the plate of leftover cookies back into the kitchen so you could box them up.

‘I know you like them Mase, but it’s probably not a good idea for you to eat so many before a game in a few days’ you scolded, sitting down next to him and tucking yourself into his side before gently rubbing his tummy as he shut his eyes.

‘I know, it’s like an addiction. I might have to go see someone about it’ he mumbled sleepily, seeming too full to put any effort in to talking above a whisper before he peered down at you and pressing a gentle kiss on the tip of your nose. ‘Feels nice though, thank you’ he smiled, referring to the way you were stroking over his tummy lightly to help ease some of his discomfort.

‘I’ll just have to ration you in the future’ you teased and he tickled your side in protest causing you to squirm lightly in his hold.

‘So listen I need to talk to you about something’ he told you, sitting up slightly and in the past you’d panic at his serious tone but you were curious about what he was about to ask you.

‘Go for it’ you smiled and he gave you a little laugh before continuing.

‘You remember when I told you I went on loan for a year abroad?’

‘Yeah, Vitesse was it?’

‘That’s it’ he smiled, his heart warming at the fact you remembered even though you didn’t talk about it that much. ‘Well, they’re making a little documentary about me and my time there and they’ve asked if I could go over there for some filming. I was hoping you would come with me?’

‘Wow Mase, that’s amazing’ you breathed, suddenly overcome with pride for the boy sitting in front of you. You were proud of him everyday for all that he did and all he’d accomplished but when you were at home with him next to you, and he was just your Mason it was easy to forget all he’d done in his young life and all the people that loved him.

‘Yeah, I can’t believe it but I’m super excited’ he smiled. ‘It’s not for a little while so you’ve got time too book time off of you need to. It’s over a weekend so you’d probably only need the Friday before so we can fly out and we’d come back on the Tuesday after. I’d be filming for most of Saturday and Sunday but I thought we could stay and extra day and do some sightseeing? Like so I can show you round? It’s all paid for and everything like you don’t need to worry about any of that I just want your pretty little butt on the plane next to me’ he winked and even though you were overwhelmed by the thought of it all, something in the back of your head made you wonder what else was going on.

‘What’s the catch?’ You laughed and Mason pulled you in a little closer with a smile.

‘No catch, I just wanna take you somewhere that’s special to me’ he explained and when you raised your eyebrow at him he rolled his eyes with a laugh. ‘Fine. My parents are coming too’ he explained and your eyes went wide.

You hadn’t met any of Masons family yet, but you could tell from a mile off how close they all were and it scared the hell out of you. It wasn’t that you were putting off meeting them on purpose, they sounded like amazing people from everything Mason told you but Mason knew not to push you due to your past however it was getting to the point where you knew it needed to happen.

‘Oh, um…’

‘They’re part of the documentary too, they’re gonna be in a few scenes with me and I just thought it might be a good time? I know you’re nervous but they’re so excited to meet you, they’re constantly asking after you and I thought it would be fun this way. You can meet them they day before we fly and they’ll go home on the Sunday so we get Monday all to ourselves. I know you’re nervous baby but I promise you everything will be fine’

‘I know’ you laughed, nestling you head into his neck as he pulled you even closer. ‘I know it’s time but I’m so so nervous’ you confessed as he stroked your cheek gently. ‘It’s like I don’t have my own family for you to meet and I have no idea what to do or how to feel’ you explained as he looked down at you sympathetically.

‘Well that’s not completely true. I consider you part of my family’ he told you quietly, brushing his fingers through your hair with a soft smile and you felt your eyes sting as your bottom lip wobbled. ‘It’s true, you and me come as a pair. It doesn’t matter that you’ve got no one for me to meet. You’re the most important person to me and I’d do anything to make you happy’

‘Mase’ you breathed, overwhelmed by his sweet words.

‘Also I’ve met Freya, that was daunting enough so I think it’s only fair you meet my parents’

‘True’ you laughed, feeling the tears fall from your eyes that he quickly brushed away before kissing your forehead. ‘Okay, I’ll do it’

‘Thank you baby’ he breathed, caressing your cheek as he smiled down at you lovingly. ‘Honestly I promise you’ve got nothing to worry about and I’ll make it really special for us’

‘Hey Mase. Do they um, do they know? Like about…’

‘I haven’t told them everything, I didn’t want to overstep but they know the basics. I wanted to leave it up to you to decide what you do and don’t tell them. And I said not to bring anything up unless you do first’

‘Thank you’ you breathed, tucking yourself back into him.

‘Think about it this way, you’ve got time to prepare now and then once it’s done you’ve met the two most scary ones and everyone else will be a breeze’ he teased. ‘You’ll be fine baby, they’ll love you’

You hoped they would, the idea that the family of the man you loved didn’t approve of you made your head spin, but after a lot of positive reinforcement from Freya, you pulled yourself together and made sure you were ready for them.

You managed to get a half day on the Thursday before the big trip, getting to Masons house at around 2pm with all your stuff for the weekend and dressed for dinner with his parents that evening. You went with a mid length floaty floral dress, hoping to give off a good impression and make sure you looked good enough to be with Mason. It was nothing like you normally wore but it was still pretty and you hoped Mason would like it too.

Mason wasn’t back from training yet but would be within the hour so you let yourself in with the spare key he’d given you the week before knowing you’d be back earlier than him and you were happy to see the place was spotless.

As not to create any mess, you took your stuff upstairs and did a quick run through of the house, making sure his parents room was perfect and the bathroom was spotless before making your way through to the kitchen but you could hear his car pulling up as you started getting ingredients out of the fridge.

‘Baby, you here?’ He shouted through the house and you rounded the corner to meet him by the front door, his eyes going wide and they raked over your body, but it was the subtle bite of his lip that let you know he liked what he saw. ‘Well, good afternoon to me’

‘Do I look okay?’ You asked, brushing down your dress and he made his way over to you so he could hold you at arms length by your waist, his eyes still eating you up in a way you hadn’t seen him do before. ‘I don’t want to make a bad first impression’

‘First of all, that would never happen. But you look unreal babe. You’re fulfilling all my girl next door fantasies and I’m very close to taking you upstairs and-‘

‘No way’ you laughed pushing him off by his chest and turning to make your way back into the kitchen but he gently grabbed your wrist before you could get too far.

‘Wait, I want my welcome home hug and kiss’ he laughed and you rolled your eyes before wrapping your arms around his waist and placing a soft kiss to his already pouty lips. ‘I love coming home to you’ he whispered, your whole body erupting in goosebumps as he stared down at you with a twinkle in his eye and his hands cupping your bum. ‘I think I could get used to this’

‘Yeah yeah Casanova. Come on we don’t have much time. You go change and I’ll get started on dinner’ you told him, squeezing his sides before shooing him off upstairs. He came down around 10 minutes later and he walked into the kitchen with a loving smile on his face.

‘I’m having the best day. I was on the winning team at training and now there’s a beautiful woman in my kitchen cooking me dinner’

‘Mason I swear to god I will murder you if you don’t stop pissing about’

‘Hey meanie pants, what up’ he laughed, grabbing you by your arms so you’d look at him and you felt the guilt wash over you immediately.

‘Sorry, I’m just stressing, I didn’t mean to be horrible please just ignore me’

‘It’s alright. Just breathe with me’ he told you with a cheeky smile before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath in and a slow breath out. ‘Hey, you’re not doing it with me’ he pouted. ‘If wont work unless you really try’ he laughed so you humoured him, shutting your eyes and taking a deep breath with him and you hated the fact it was working a little bit. ‘There we go. Now what do you want me to do?’

‘Can you reach up and get the pasta for me? And then make sure we’ve got enough ice in the freezer’

‘Yes ma’am’ he winked, kissing your nose before doing everything you asked and then starting to set the table. You were so focused on chopping and stirring that you almost jumped out of your skin when the doorbell went and you felt yourself freeze on the spot. ‘Stay here, I’ll get it’ Mason smiled, kissing your nose again before hurrying off to let his parents in. You could hear their voices getting louder and your anxiety rising along with it but as soon as Masons face came into view you felt your shoulders relax. He smiled at you sweetly, holding his hand out for you to take and you carefully threaded you fingers through his before he pulled you to his side.

‘This is y/n’ he smiled proudly and after a big gulp, you looked over at his parents. They were both smiling widely at you before his mum laughed herself at you with an excited squeal and you couldn’t help but laugh and she pulled you into her.

‘Oh it’s so lovely to meet you, Mason doesn’t shut up about you I swear’ she laughed, pulling back to smile brightly ‘I’m Debbie, this is Tony’ she told you, and you smiled at Masons dad as he held out his hand for you to shake.

‘Ignore her, she’s just excited’ his dad explained as Debbie tutted in his direction.

‘Well yes, I am. It’s nice to have another girl in the family I feel like I’m over run with boys most of the time’

‘What about Summer? And Mila?’ Mason laughed, placing his hand on your hip to let you know he was still there and you felt your whole body relax into him.

‘Oh shush, I meant an adult girl who I can have a conversation with. Anyway, something smells great’

‘Yeah, y/n’s making dinner. It won’t be too much longer’ Mason explained. ‘Why don’t you guys put your bags away and get yourself sorted and then we can eat’ They both agreed, shuffling out of the room leaving you and Mason alone again and he pulled you into a hug, kissing you temple gently. ‘See, wasn’t so bad was it?’

‘I don’t think I said a word’ you whispered, both laughing before you quickly finished dinner off and plated up just in time for his parents to come back down.

‘Wow, this all looks delicious’ Debbie commented as you sat down and you felt Mason squeeze your knee besides you.

‘Yeah, y/n’s a bit of a wiz in the kitchen’

‘I wouldn’t go that far’ you smiled up at Mason and he rolled his eyes playfully at you.

‘She’s just being modest, she makes the best cookies I’ve ever had’ he told them, rattling off all the other things you’d made for him that he loved whilst you sat and blushed, his parents looking on at the pair of you with a smile before you changed the topic to ask how they had been and what the journey up was like.

When you were done, Debbie helped you stack the dishwasher and you couldn’t believe how comfortable you felt around her already. She kept the conversation light and flowing and once it was all away she sent you a bright smile.

‘Now, Mase doesn’t know this but I’ve bought a photo album of his from when he was a baby, I thought you might like to see some of them’

‘Oh I’d love too, I bet he was so cute’

‘Well I am biased but he was adorable. I’ll go grab it from upstairs and meet you in the other room’ she smiled before scurrying off to retrieve it.

You made your way into the living room and cautiously sat down next to Mason. He smiled at you placing his hand palm up on your thigh for you to thread your fingers through and once you had he pulled you into him gently and kissed you on the head just as Debbie walked in and placed the album in your lap.

‘Oh mum, why did you bring that?’ He groaned as you laughed at him, opening it up to the first page to see the most adorable and tiny baby boy. You couldn’t help but coo at him before you felt him crawl back beside you and place his chin on your shoulder from behind you so he could look too.

You both looked through it as his parents told you stories from when he was a kid. From what they were telling you he was still as cheeky now as he was back then. It felt so nice to be surrounded by a loving family, the realisation that you’d never had this hit you like a truck and you had to blink away your tears. Mason cottoned on straight away and kissed your cheek discreetly to try and comfort you and you squeezed his thigh in response.

‘We’re gonna head up I think, need a good nights sleep before all that traveling tomorrow’ Debbie smiled, pulling the pair of you into hug before they made their way upstairs. Leaving you and Mason alone but you were afraid to look at him as you knew what he would say.

‘Is everything okay?’ He whispered. And you nodded your head even though that wasn’t how you felt. ‘You can tell me you know’

‘I know’ you whispered, finally feeling brave enough to look at him but the expression on his face made your eyes water again. ‘I didn’t think I’d feel like this, you know? Like missing something I’ve never really had and I don’t know why I’m getting so upset’ you laughed but you felt the tears roll down your cheeks that Mason brushed away.

‘I know baby. And I know it might not help but you’ve got me now, and all the weirdos that come as a part of my package deal’ he joked and even though you were still laughing your tears flowed even faster as you started to feel like you finally belonged somewhere. ‘It’s okay to get upset, love. It’s not like you’ve never had it. But they’re not in your life for a reason. They never deserved you and they don’t deserve your tears’

‘Love you’ you whispered, still getting used to saying those words after a few weeks but the way he smiled at you made your whole body flush.

‘Love you, too’ he whispered back, kissing you gently before taking your hand in his. ‘You ready to go up?’ He asked and you nodded, helping him lock up downstairs before quietly making your way into his room. ‘I’m so glad they’ve gone to bed, all I’ve thought about is taking this dress off of you’ he told you as soon as you walked in but you batted him off before grabbing your pyjamas.

‘Down boy, not tonight’

‘You’re joking. Why not?’

‘Mason, I’m not having sex with you whilst your parents are across the hall. End of. It’s bad enough us sleeping in the same bed’

‘What are you on about?’ He laughed, trying to hold you by your waist but you were determined to not let him get under your skin. ‘We’re adults, they probably can guess we’re having sex’

‘Just go take a cold shower or something’ you told him and he pouted at you dramatically before marching off, giving you chance to get changed without his prying eyes on you. Once he opened the door again you went inside to join him so you could clean your teeth and do your skincare before crawling into bed with him. His arms around you as you laid your head on his chest.

‘Hey y/n? I thought you looked really pretty today’

‘Mason, I told you I’m not having sex with you’

‘I’m not asking you too’ he laughed, squeezing you tighter as you laughed into his neck. ‘Can a man not tell his girlfriend she looks pretty?’

‘Not when there’s a ulterior motive, no’

‘I’m offended you’d think that way about me’

‘Go to sleep, Mase’ you laughed and after a quick kiss goodnight you were both off.

The flight wasn’t that long the next day and you arrived in Amsterdam at around 2pm where you picked up the rental car that the company who were making the documentary had organised for you all. Tony drove and you sat in the back with Mason who was a bit sleepy, the anxiety from flying wearing him out and you looked at him lovingly as he sat and played with your fingers as you spoke to Debbie.

You looked up in awe as you approached the hotel, the grand white building looked intimidating but you followed them into the impressive reception and stood next to Mason as he checked you all in.

‘So I’ve got two rooms, both for two nights’ she confirmed and Mason nodded causing you to look at him with confusion but you made a note to ask him about it later.

Both rooms were on the top floor of the building but thankfully quite far apart from each other and you gasped as you walked in. The room was beautiful, a huge loft bed that was built into a wooden platform and comfy sofas dotted around but it was the huge bath next to the bed you gravitated towards first and you laughed as Mason cheekily wiggled his eyebrows at you.

‘Not bad, huh?’

‘Considering I’m used to staying at travel lodges, I think it’s more than not bad’ you told him, looking out of the window that you could see the whole estate from.

‘Dinners at six so in like two hours, you fancy a little nap?’ He asked, flopping down on top of the sheets and you carefully crawled in besides him, hugging him from behind as you could tell he was still a bit fragile from the flight and you knew he secretly loved being the little spoon. You felt him relax as he bought your hands up to his mouth to kiss over them gently and you smiled before kissing the back of his neck.

‘Mase? I thought you said we were staying till Tuesday. This room is only booked until Sunday’

‘Yeah don’t worry, we’re going somewhere else for the last two nights’ he mumbled sleepily and rather than ask anymore questions you left a light kiss on the back of his neck before letting the soft sounds of his breathing lull you to sleep.

Around 45 minutes until you had to be at dinner you woke up and slipped off into the bathroom so you could get changed and since Mason seemed to like the dress you wore so much yesterday you decided to get changed into a similar one however this one had a bit of a slit up the leg that you thought Mason would enjoy.

You were just applying the finishing touches to you make up when a sleepy Mason walked in, but you noticed the way his demeanour changed as soon as he caught sight of you and the low growl that came from him made you clench your thighs together.

‘Is it my birthday or something? These look insane on you’ he murmured ’you gonna let me do something about it this time’ he whispered in your ear as he gripped your waist and the feeling of him prodding you in the back was making your heart flutter.

‘We don’t have time’ you told him meekly, but the kisses that were trailing down your neck were making you shiver and you knew you couldn’t deny him twice.

‘I can be quick’ he mumbled getting down on his knees behind you and lifting your dress up and over your bum before pulling you underwear down to your ankles as he kissed your thighs gently. ‘You’re ready for me though by the looks of things’ he laughed and you gasped when you felt his tongue tease you apart. The noise that came from you almost made you embarrassed but the way he just dived into you even further made you whimper. He didn’t stay down there long, standing up so he could push you forward gently, eventually resting your elbows on the sink so you could look up at him through the mirror.

You hissed as he started pushing in, his eyes straight on yours in the reflection but you let him know it was okay to keep going and he gently carried on before speeding up. He kept his hands on your bum before one slipped down your leg, grabbing your thigh so he could place your knee on the counter and you moaned loudly at the new position.

‘That’s it baby, good girl’ he moaned, his hands reaching up to pull the front of your dress down so he could grab a handful of your chest and your arms nearly gave out with how turned on you were, feeling your high starting to fizz in your lower belly but you needed a helping hand. Eyes still focused on his in the mirror, you carefully slipped your hand in between your legs so you could play with yourself but the sight only caused him to pound into you harder.

‘Mase, I’m close’ you gasped, pushing yourself through it and as soon as you were done you pushed him off, getting down in your knees in front of him and opening your mouth so he knew what to do and the strangled moan that came from him made you shiver. He only needed pump himself a few times before he pushed himself into your mouth, releasing a few seconds after and you swallowed him down the best you could. His breathing was heavy but he helped you up and got you adjusted back into your dress before kissing you softly and pulling you into a hug. ‘I didn’t know you were gonna do that I nearly cum all over your face’ he laughed.

‘I was trying not to make a mess’ you giggled before reaching down to pull your underwear up. ‘You better hurry up and get ready, I don’t wanna be late’ you told him and he nodded before sorting himself out and the pair of you left to meet them at six on the dot. ‘We’re gonna be late now, they’ll know what we’ve been doing’

‘We’ll be two minutes baby. I know I’m good but I bet even they don’t believe we can do it in two minutes’ he laughed and you tapped his chest to scold him before you found them sat at the table reserved for you in the hotel restaurant. Your waitress explained that your meal tonight would be paid for by the company so Mason used this as an excuse to order whatever he wanted. ‘What are you thinking, love?’

‘I really want dessert, so I might skip a starter’

‘Can’t handle all three, eh?’ Tony laughed and you shook you’re head slightly whilst picking your drink up to take a sip.

‘I told her not to, but she had a snack just before we left the room’ he told them, squeezing your knee in jest and you almost spat your water out at what he was insinuating. ‘You alright there?’ He laughed, gently tapping you on the back as you grabbed a napkin but you could tell you were blushing furiously at his dirty comment.

‘Sorry, it went down the wrong pipe’ you spluttered and you could see Mason go to say something else inappropriate but you gave him the death glare and he closed his mouth with a cheeky grin. Thankfully his parents seemed none the wiser but it took you a while to be able to look at them properly.

Mason let you share some of his starter as an apology and thankfully you weren’t too full for afters but once you were all done you felt like you could of exploded.

‘We’ll probably head to bed now, so we can be up nice and early for tomorrow’ Debbie explained and you looked at Mason who nodded his head in agreement. After hugs goodnight Mason convinced you to have one drink with him in the bar where you scolded him for his rude jokes before leading you outside for a walk around the grounds as he wanted to take some pictures of you with the impressive background.

‘Mason, what are you doing?’ You laughed, watching him lay on the floor in front of you whilst he directed you how to sit.

‘Just go with it. It’s not my fault you look like a pretty princess. I want some nice pictures of you that are just for me’

‘Would you not rather take those in our room?’ You winked exposing your thigh a little bit more through the slit in your dress and you watched him stare at you with pink cheeks and wide eyes before pulling you up and running you back up to your room.

Tony drove you to the stadium the next day, Mason sitting in the back with you as he tried to point out places he knew and you watched him with a smile as he got more excited the closer you got. Everyone seemed so genuinely happy to see him as he greeted the crew and all the old staff he used to work with but he always kept an eye on you to make sure you were okay and whenever your eyes met you felt the butterflies erupt inside you.

Whilst Mason was sat down for his interview, someone from the club took you, Debbie and Tony off on a tour of the stadium and so you could see some old videos and pictures from his time there. You couldn’t get over how cute he was back then with his little baby face and massive quiff but he still looked like your handsome Mase.

‘It’s so weird, it’s like he’s grown up so much but in other ways he still looks the same’ you commented and Debbie agreed with a laugh.

‘I was just thinking that. It think it’s the little noodle arms’ she joked and as if on cue Mason appeared.

‘I do hope you weren’t just talking about me just then’ he laughed, wrapping an arm around your waist and kissing your temple.

‘We were saying how adorable you were’ Debbie winked and he raised his eyebrows at you.

‘She’s right, you were very sweet’ you told him, kissing his nose as he squeezed your side playfully.

‘What’s all this about ‘were’. I still am’ he argued and you laughed as Debbie rolled her eyes at him behind his back.

After a quick lunch, Mason carried on with his filming that his parents were now involved in and you sat in the stands as they slowly walked around the pitch with his old coach before your phone rung.

‘Hey Frey’ you smiled, thankful you had someone to talk to for a bit.

‘Hello sweetheart, how’s the trip?’ She asked

‘Yeah, good so far. I’m just watching Mase and his parents do some filming’ you told her, going on to explain everything you’d done so far and how nice his parents had been to you.

‘Told you you had nothing to worry about’ she laughed and you rolled your eyes at her. ‘I’m proud of you though, I know this is a lot’

‘Yeah, well he’s worth it’ you breathed, laughing at the gagging noises she was making down the phone.

You spent the rest of the time talking about her upcoming graduation and what her plans were next. You knew she was moving back down south and you couldn’t be more excited to get to see her more often, finally feeling like your life was falling back into place.

The next day his filming continued, this time you were in the city centre at a few locations he used to visit a lot but you were all wrapped up just after lunch. Mason parents were catching a flight that afternoon so after you’d eaten they said their goodbyes and took a taxi back to the airport leaving you and Mason alone and you had no idea as to where you were going or what you were doing next.

‘Right, there’s a food shop not too far from here, shall we go stock up and then I’ll take us to where we’re staying?’

‘Okay’ you nodded, still unsure as to what was happening but you went along with it, pushing the trolly along as he filled it with all your favourite foods before jumping back in the car so he could take you to your next destination.

You weren’t in the car long but your eyes grew wide when you spotted the lake house he was pulling into, your breath catching in your throat as you took it all and you turned to him with a wide smile.

‘Surprise’ he laughed, pulling you in for a quick kiss and you held him by his cheeks to keep him there before he jumped out and opened your door.

‘Mase, this is… how did you?’ You smiled as he helped you out and you were so overcome with emotion you weren’t sure you could finish your sentence.

‘I can be sneaky’ he smiled, holding your hand as he dragged you up the steps so you could have a look around the cozy wood cabin. It was perfect and you couldn’t believe he’d kept this from you this whole time. ‘So what do you think?’

‘I love it. I didn’t think this weekend could get any better’ you laughed, kissing him softly as he squeezed your bum gently.

‘We’re only just getting started’ he winked.

You spent the rest of the night cooking dinner together that you ate in front of the tv before you both got changed into something warm and comfy so you could sit on the deck in front of the fire that looked out onto the lake. You were in your own little world when Mason came outside and you smiled softly at him.

‘I wondered why you got that bag of marshmallows’ you laughed, taking the stick from him that he was handing to you so you could load it up whilst he worked out how to light the fire. Once it was all done he sat behind you on the cushioned seat, you in between his legs as he wrapped his arms around your waist and rested his chin on your shoulder. ‘Thanks for all this, I’ve never done anything like this before’ you told him, not having the courage to look at him right now.

‘What do you mean?’ He asked you gently, clearly picking up on the emotion in your voice and not wanting to push you too far but you felt comfortable enough in his arms to carry on talking.

‘Just all of it, you know? Never been away with a boy before really, nothing like this anyway. Never felt so comfortable around anyone else parents’ you laughed as he kissed your neck with a smile. ‘I really like them’

‘Well they love you’ he laughed and you finally turned to look at him, offering him some of your half burnt marshmallow that he ate whilst trying to make out it was nice. ‘I bought you here for a reason you know’

‘To this house? Or here in general?’ You quizzed as you both shuffled about a bit so Mason was resting against the back of the chair and you could see each other a bit better. You sat and admired him for a few seconds as the glow from the fire lit up his face, the flames crackling in his big dark eyes and you had to hold yourself back from leaning forward to kiss him.

‘Here in general’ he told you softly, lacing your fingers together as he rubbed slow circles into the back of your hand. ‘I used to be a lot like you, you know?

‘What? a bit sarcastic and hungry all the time’

‘Very funny’ he teased, squeezing your hand before kissing your knuckles. ‘No. Closed off, not trusting’

‘I don’t believe that’ you chuckled lightly but the look on his face told you he was serious.

‘It’s true. Growing up in football, you’re basically at war with all the other boys in the academy you know? Fighting for places and opportunities so I always kept my head down and did what I needed to do. When I got here I was so focused on getting the job done and proving myself that I didn’t really take into account that I could enjoy it. I remember the coach here, I used to shake his hand ever day before training but I never smiled at him’ he confessed and you squeezed his hand gently to let him know you were still listening. ‘But they didn’t give up on me, always included me in things and really made me feel part of the family, I really learnt a lot here. I know sometimes you’ve wondered in the past why I was so patient with you and why I never pushed you. It’s because I know exactly how you feel and how hard it is to change. But I’ve adored you from the second I saw you and I knew that I could maybe teach you everything they taught me.

You felt your tears rolling down your face before you even knew you were crying and you gently reached forward to cup his jaw so you could kiss him softly, pouring yourself into him as you tried to let him know how much you appreciate his sweet words.

‘That’s why I wanted to bring you here, this place is special to me, and so are you. I wouldn’t be who I am today without this place and all the people I met and I know how lucky I am that I get to do stuff like this and bring my people with me. And I love that you’re now one of my people. I’d hate for you to think you don’t belong anywhere cause you belong to me’ he whispered against your lips and you had to let out a shaky breath so you wouldn’t cry any harder. Mason always had such a way with words and you couldn’t help let your brain do the talking as you spewed words out at him.

‘I love you so much, Mase. I swear I thank my lucky stars everyday that you came into my life. You’ve completely turned my world upside down in the best way possible and I’m so thankful I get to be part of yours’ you told him, never having said anything like that to him before and you watched as his eyes glossed over and his bottom lip wobbled ever so slightly. ‘Thank you for bringing me here and thank you for telling me all this. I feel so much closer to you’

‘I love you too. You have no idea how much’ he laughed, voice thick with unshed tears as pulled you back to him so he could kiss you, his hands reaching up under your sweatshirt so he could stroke over you bare skin and you smiled into the kiss.

When you pulled back, you laid yourself down on his chest, head half tucked into his neck so you could both watch the fire die down and just hold each other as your words sunk in.

You loved him and he loved you. And right now that’s all that mattered.

Tagged: @chaotic-taco-collector-blog @mm-vii @footiehoemcfc @masonmount07

[gothic-thoughts]

Smart Choices

Levi Ackerman x Black Fem Reader Angst

MafiaAU, MeetUgly

CW: shooting, threatening, kidnapping?, laid back Levi, Reader speaks Japanese (dw I gotchu😉)

Word Count: 1430 (give or take)

My guards manhandle the little bastard into my office and to her knees before my desk, leaving her helpless with nothing but a glare in my direction. She struggled against the tape around her wrists and I walked around my desk to lean against the side opposite of my chair, looking down on her with slight amusement.

"Took you long enough~" I hum, squatting in front of her.

"Careful sir, she's lively."

"Oh, I know. I'm quite the fan of liveliness."

She suddenly breaks through the poorly fastened restraints, jumps up, and runs for the door. Before her fingers could even grace the metal of the handle, Silas grabbed her, making her turn around but in the same second, my worker was shot with his own gun. She seems to be in shock, the gun shaking in her hand as he slumps to the floor, holding his wound.

Welp, not my fault he left the safety off, basic gun safety. Maybe Mark will do better. He stepped up from behind and smacked the gun out of her hand before tightly grabbing her by the neck watching sadistically as she scratched at his wrists and forearms.

"No... no..."

"Guess I should've warned you not to run from me. Although, that's usually a given."

"Don't...let him kill me." She choked out making me raise my eyebrows, "You...kill me. N-not... some low... life."

"Hm, interesting." I snap my fingers, "You heard the lady."

He releases her and drops his hand at the same time, making her buckle to the floor as air rushes back into her lungs with loud coughs and gasps. Mark grabs the back of her shirt and drags her back to my feet. I crouch down and cup her jaw, forcing her to look at me to watch the fear in her soul, but it wavers. She's not scared, or at the very least she's ready to die.

"Heh..." I push away her jaw, "Such a pretty thing, but such sticky fingers."

"If you're gonna kill me then do it."

"Eager too. Mark."

"But sir--"

I pull out my gun, "Leave in a hurry or a bag. Your choice."

She remains silent as my dumbass of a goon rushes out of my sight, closing the door behind him. I continue to observe her, analyzing everything from the disheveled clothes to the bold look in her eye. What am I going to do with you?

"Anyway, you don't seem scared of me," I rest my gun on my desk, "Hell, I'd go as far as to say you're ready to die, woman."

She raises her eyebrow, "Woman?" That was hot.

"Well I don't know your name and you seem stubborn enough not to tell me so I'm gonna call you what you are; a woman."

"Hmph."

"And I'm guessing you know what my name is."

"Levi." She rolled her eyes, "Everyone around here knows your name; I meant your real name."

"That is my real name. You know who I am and still stole from me in my own club?"

Her boldness finally fizzled out somehow when she looked to the closet door to avoid my gaze. Finally, I was starting to think I lost my edge.

"And that is my real name."

"And if I don't?"

"Humor me. Now answer my question; you said you wanted me to kill you; what are you escaping?"

"Nothing. And even if I was, I wouldn't come to you if all people."

A loud and sarcastic laugh erupted from my chest, "You put your life on the line to rob me, that's desperate. You want, no, you need something, whether you like it or not."

"Shouldn't I be asking you that since you're pressing me for a couple hundred dollars, Mr. I-have-and-own-everything?"

"You killed two of my men before being strangled back to your place so I want to know what would you need that much money for that badly."

She stayed silent and hung her head knowing I wouldn't let her go without a response. She probably even thinks I'll kill her if I don't get it. She looks at me with tears swelling around those beautiful eyes.

"My ex owes a loan shark."

"Okay? And?"

"He's only my ex cuz I found out he put his contract in my name."

My eyebrows furrow and my jaw drops. How dare he? After I deal with her shark I will deal with him personally. Until then, she's gotta stay with me, where else will she go? I'd have to give her money to pay the shark and her rent anyway. Fine. I stand up straight.

"Get up."

"You're letting me.... go?" She asks standing slowly.

"Where is he now?"

"Hopefully dead." She growls, "We had a huge fight and I kicked his bitch ass out."

"Wonderful, very proud, but I meant the loan shark."

"I don't know, I don't keep tabs on her unless she calls looking for her payment."

"Ah, a woman shark. That narrows it down." I watch as she curses herself in her head, "What's her name?"

"I don't need you to--"

"You're welcome to stay with me as well."

"I am not living with you."

"I live in a mansion and I run a yakuza. You'll barely see me unless you really want to." I wink, "Name please."

"I don't need you to protect me!"

"I'm sure you don't because you're oh so very dangerous." I roll my eyes, "But if I don't, you'll either end up in deeper debt with a hospital bill or found at the bottom of a river. So, again, loan shark's name, from the top."

She sighs heavily, "Ymir."

"Ah, haven't heard that name in a while. I'll deal with her myself as well then."

I turn to walk back to my chair when she grabs my arm firmly and pulls me back to her. I raised my eyebrow and ogled her a little, acknowledging how quick she stood up and grabbed me. Not even a little fear. I mean she did steal from me already, but it's kinda hot.

"Tell me why you care so much."

"Let's just say that I like you, how's that?"

"Bullshit."

"Too bad you don't have much of a choice. Now, would you like to go?"

"Go wh--?"

"My house, genius."

"I never agreed to--"

"Either I take you in my sports car or a guard can take you in a van. Your choice."

"Are you serious?"

"Totemo(Very)."

She scoffs before storming over to the door and standing next to it. She takes my keys off the wall and throws them at me to which I catch it and smirk at her once more before walking over and opening the door for her.

"Good choice."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the car, she's quiet and looking out the window at every building, street lamp, and illuminated sign we zoom past at 70 mph. My gloves squeak slightly as I realigned my hands on the wheel to turn down a darkened street, catching her tensing up in my peripheral vision.

"Relax sunshine, we're almost there."

"Not really something you wanna hear from a yakuza boss in the dead of night, so thanks for that."

"It's not my fault we found you at night. Oh, I never caught your name woman."

"Stop calling me that."

"Noted, you like sunshine better."

"What!? I never said--"

"You got a name or not?"

She paused, sighing heavily. "It's (Y/n)."

That is...really nice actually. "Wasn't expecting that. You're a foreigner or is that your--?"

"Sore wa watashino onamae desu(it's my name)."

"Alright, alright. I'll dead this convo right there cuz you still seem like you hate me besides me helping you out."

"Oh please, there's always a catch. There's something you're not telling me. You probably want to sleep with me in return."

"Well, of course I do, you're hot. But I don't want to in return for anything. Maybe I just want the feeling of waking up next to someone pretty. Hopefully more than once."

She gasps and quickly looks out her window completely silent while I park in my garage.

"Must Yakuza members be so outta pocket?"

"Only thing that keeps us respected. Now come on, I'll introduce you to the butler and get you to your room."

"My room?"

"Oi, don't get sappy on me, sunshine. It's just a guest room."

Bold of her to assume because she didn't wanna see me that I didn't want to see her, so she'll be sleeping in the guest room closest to my bedroom.

[klanced]

katie your lawyer au tags have me on my knees I never thought guys in suits doing stuff would seem interesting but wow…wow. your mind

Thank u Anon this AU is incredibly indulgent for me.......... ok time 4 more world-building.

I think @heynhay's original idea of Keith & Lance working together at the same firm is best. For both plot reasons but also for my own morale LOL

So everyone works at a fairly large private firm that splits its practice and has some of its associates doing profit-driven law (i.e. corporate or finance) which subsidizes the public interest/service work that the other associates do.

The firm is like "Altea & Daibazaal LLP" or something. Yes I am implying that the firm was started by Alfor and Zarkon. Yes I am implying that Allura and Lotor are nepo babies.

I know I originally said that Keith and Lance were law school rivals but I've changed my mind... (RIP to the law school rivalry dynamics

Instead I'm making it so that Keith and Lance are the same age but Lance has been practicing longer because he went straight into law school after college. Whereas Keith started working after college and got like a Master's degree in Social Work or something before deciding on law school at 26. (I just think Keith is the kind of person who goes to law school later in life.)

Okay onto the specific Klance dynamics... Keith and Lance are both pushing 30 and are also literally lawyers so they are professional and serious about their work... But there is wiggle room for them to still be rivals :p

Lance and Keith are both junior associates at the firm. Lance has seniority because he's been at the firm longer but he's still a year or so away from formally becoming a senior associate.

Lance really, REALLY wants to make partner and he sees Keith as his biggest threat/rival because Keith is Shiro's little brother, and Shiro recently made partner at the firm, so Lance thinks Keith might be a nepo hire. Also some of the senior associates recently left the firm so now Lance is stuck showing Keith the ropes and he's lowkey super bitter about it.

Basically TLDR Lance starts off Not Liking Keith at all for various real or imagined reasons and begins a work rivalry with him. Keith doesn't actually GAF about making partner because he's only planning on working at the firm for a few years to help pay off his student loans, but Lance doesn't know that. However, Keith is a naturally very competitive person, and he also likes having Lance's attention, so Keith immediately goes all in on the rivalry.

Lance, internally: "This Fucking Guy."

Keith, internally: "I am so good at flirting."

The first few months are rough between them. However both are also incredibly productive in their work.

The romcom part of the AU kicks in once the two of them have to start working together on a huge high stakes civil case and they're both like wow.... *twirls hair* he's so competent.............. <3

Anyway misc. things:

TBH I have no idea what kind of law Keith and Lance might private practice... I'm also really torn on what Shiro, Allura, and Hunk would practice hdjsksdhedf

Pidge is hired on a fellowship for either environmental law or data security/privacy law.

Coran does employment law.

Keith went into law school planning on going into public interest/not-for-profit legal aid and swore he would never, ever do corporate law but then he saw his student loans and was like. Hm. Okay maybe some Biglaw is okay. And that's how he ended up at the firm.

Keith:

[zmzebra-writes]

Title: The Wrong Amagi Wedding Chapters: 1/? (next) Genre: Comedy Summary: After being invited to their father's second marriage, Rinne and Hiiro find themselves having to temporarily return to the village. Not wanting their friends to be alone, the rest of Crazy:B and Alkaloid join them on their journey back, but these "city folks" might not be the only ones learning something new during this visit.

In this chapter.... Rinne receives a strange phone call from an unknown number during practice. The rest of Crazy:B find themselves wanting to stick their noses into his business.

It was practice as usual for Crazy:B. Meaning that everyone showed up late, talked for another ten minutes, and then began practice 30 minutes later than scheduled. They had just reached their Niki-sanctioned snack break when Kohaku noticed a buzzing noise coming from Rinne’s discarded jacket.

“Rinne, your phone is going off,” he said, as he leaned over to glance at the lit up screen.

“Who’s it from?” Rinne asked as he walked over, drying his hair with a small towel.

“Doesn’t say,” Kohaku looked down at the strange string of numbers, “The phone number looks real strange so it’s probably spam. See?” He lifted the phone to show the group.

Rinne stiffened at the sight, before giving an overexaggerated sigh and letting the towel drape over his neck. “That company really won’t stop calling to get us to take their job on HoldHands.”

He swiped the cell phone from Kohaku. “But as you know, being the leader means being responsible, so duty calls~,” Rinne said as he began walking out of the room to the hall, “You guys do what you want while I take this.”

The door clicked behind him.

“That was strange,” asked Kohaku, “I’m not just imagining things, right?”

“HiMERU agrees. Amagi is hiding something.” HiMERU put a hand to his chin as he contemplated the possibilities based on the evidence. “Perhaps he is hiding his phone calls with a dangerous loan shark who is threatening him to pay his debts before they turn to more gruesome methods.”

“Or maybe he’s hiding an affair with a mysterious lover!” postulated Kohaku. He looked over at Niki with pity, “Sorry, Niki.”

Niki, who had a granola bar in his mouth, bit down and began rapidly waving his hands as he made noises of denial. “No, no! What do you mean by sorry?! What Rinne does in his free time doesn’t matter to me. Besides, I don’t think it's either of those things.”

HiMERU switched his look of pity to one of curiosity. “Oh? Do elaborate, Shiina. Who do you think Amagi is talking to?”

Niki finished chewing his food while he hummed. “Well I don’t know the specifics, but the last time Rinne got all stressed like that over a random number was when his dad called him.”

“Rinne’s dad?!” exclaimed the others.

“That’s what I said when it happened,” said Niki, “We were just hanging out in the cafeteria kitchen after hours, since the one in the dorm was busy, when he got a call. He got all stiff when he picked up, and talked seriously with short answers. Afterwards, he told me it was his father looking for his input on village decisions, but it sounded like he wasn’t in the mood to talk about it then so I didn’t push.”

“Oh wow… Rinne’s father…” repeated Kohaku, “I forgot he was supposed to still be in contact with his family.”

“Cutting ties completely with family is tricky,” said HiMERU, “Family has a habit of finding you, wherever you are, and sneaking back into your life.”

Kohaku seemed saddened by these words but nodded. “That sounds about right.”

No one was quite sure how to move on from those dark words as they thought about their own families. 

Thankfully, the door to the practice room slammed open soon enough, revealing Rinne. “Man, the mood here looks heavy. Did all of you miss your beloved Rinne-kyun that much? Kyahaha! I’m flattered.”

HiMERU glared at Rinne, regretting feeling even a touch of empathy towards the man, but Kohaku remained curious. “Was that really your father you were talking to, Rinne?”

Rinne’s eyebrows raised. “Hahhh? And what gave you that idea? I told you, I was just talking to a company looking to hire us to promote them.”

“Rinne, be real. This isn’t one of your better lies,” said Kohaku with a flat look, “Besides, Niki told us you’ve been talking on the phone with your father lately, so is it true? Or is it something else?”

Rinne combed his hand through his hair and sighed. “As much as it pains me to say this, yes. And while normally I’d just say everything is as boring as it ever is, there is an actual issue this time.”

The rest of Crazy:B became tense. “What’s the issue?” asked Kohaku, nervous about what the answer would mean for all of them.

“It’s not that serious, you guys. Crazy:B will be fine,” said Rinne, “I just need to take a week or two off to go to the village for a bit.”

He looked directly over at Niki. “Oh, and you need to come with me.”

“What?! Why do I have to come with you?” asked Niki, “This isn’t another of your strange plans to get me to marry you, right? I live in Japan so the laws of your village don’t apply to me.”

“I wish this was a plan to get you to marry me, but no. We aren’t the ones getting married this time. My father is.”

“Your father is getting married? What happened to your mother?” asked Kohaku.

“Died when I was a kid from illness, I think,” said Rinne, raising a hand to his chin in thought, “Hiiro was still a baby at the time so I was only about four or so when it happened. For once my father decided to treat me like a normal kid and shield me from the details, so I don’t really know what killed my mother.”

“I’m sorry about that.”

Rinne plastered on a wide smile. “Nah, don’t be! You can’t really miss who you didn’t really know. It happened like a really long time ago so it doesn’t really bother me anymore.”

Niki made a face at Rinne, but decided it wasn’t worth investigating in front of Kohaku and HiMERU. Besides, more importantly…. 

“That still doesn’t explain why I have to go with you?” he said.

“Is it wrong for a man to bring his wife as his plus one to a wedding?”

“I’m not your wife!”

“I cannot believe you would divorce me right before I go to my own father’s wedding. What am I supposed to tell them?”

Before Niki could retort back and drag out this conversation longer, HiMERU cut their routine off. They did have to go back to practice eventually. “Amagi. Please elaborate on the details of your request.”

“You’re no fun, MERUMERU, but whatever,” said Rinne as he returned his phone to his pocket, “My father appears to have taken a strange curiosity in what is keeping me and Hiiro here in the city. Hence the request to bring guests with us. Just another strange end-of-life request. So I plan to bring my beautiful wife and Hiiro will probably bring his little girlfriend along as his guest.”

“You mean Love-han will also go to your village?” asked Kohaku. He didn’t know a lot about Rinne’s village, but the little he did know made him nervous for his best friend’s sake. If the villagers were anything like Hiiro and Rinne, Aira would be in trouble. Kohaku still remembered how shrill Aira’s voice became as he complained about what Hiiro was going to do with one of ANIMALS circle’s chickens.

“Based on how tightly wound both of them are around the other’s fingers, most likely.”

Kohaku couldn’t let his innocent friend who shrieked when he saw a bug go into the woods alone without protection. “Rinne, could I come along too?”

Rinne looked surprised for a moment. “You really want to come to my village, Kohaku? I doubt the cell phone coverage is very good out there.”

“Someone needs to be there to protect Love-han from you and your brother’s stupidity. ” huffed Kohaku. 

“Niki will be there too, you know?”

“.... Sorry Niki.”

Niki, who was still hungry and had moved on to eat a sandwich, looked up at the sound of his name, “Huh? Why ‘sorry Niki’ again? What’s going on?”

Rinne laughed. “Alright you got me there. How about you, MERU? Interested in learning about my mysterious backstory? We could make it a big bee family trip! Maybe the rest of Hiiro’s little group will want to come too and we could all enjoy a joint unit mission.”

On one hand, HiMERU was interested in learning about Rinne’s secrets. The older Amagi was secretive when it came to information about his past. On the other hand, the idea of going on a car trip with Rinne Amagi and The Tatsumi Kazehaya seemed like hell. So obviously HiMERU would have to—

“It could be nice to take a break for a bit,” said Kohaku, “It feels like we’ve only been getting together to work lately.”

“.... HiMERU will attend your father’s wedding. Should HiMERU bring a gift?” HiMERU could force himself to endure it.

“Nah, my father has a real hang up against ‘city’ things,” Rinne made air quotes with his hands, “I had to hide all the books I stole from the city up in a hole in a tree. Never bothered to look up there, but the birds certainly did.”

“Noted.”

“Well I’m going to go let Hiiro know he’s going to have to get some vacation days for him and his girlfriend,” said Rinne as he waved on his way to the door.

“Wait, Amagi. We still have practice—”

“Byeee~!”

♠♡♢♣🐝♣♢♡♠

To Rinne’s mild annoyance, Hiiro seemed excited to return to the village for their father’s wedding once Rinne reassured Hiiro that he would not order the village to attack him if he entered. Not that Rinne ever got a chance to share that scare tactic order with anyone other than his brother.

When Rinne mentioned that the rest of his unit would be joining them, Hiiro’s eyes widened as he began to fidget.

“If the rest of your unit mates want, father said they would be welcome to attend the wedding as our guests,” said Rinne, taking a guess at what his brother wanted to ask.

Hiiro’s eyes lit up as he smiled. Rinne internally sighed. 

“I’ll ask my unit if they want to join us right away!”

Rinne’s lip quirked upwards into an uneven grin. “Knowing your friends, I’m sure they’ll love to see where we came from.”

Hiiro began rapidly talking about all the things they could show everyone when they return, but Rinne’s mind drifted away. Despite the innocent appearance of the event, Rinne knew to stay on his guard. He’d learned the art of strategy from someone, after all. 

Alas, one can only run for so long. Rinne could see the risk he took by declining the invitation would not be worth the consequences. The best course of action would be to accept on his terms, and keep an eye on the villagers. No matter what, Rinne would put his life on the line to make sure his friends and Hiiro made it back to ES intact.

It probably wouldn’t come to that, but it was better to play it safe with the stakes so high. Rinne was not about to let Hiiro throw his future away because of a dirty trick.