#it was huge in the spn fandom and i just did not like it

[ultfreakme]

You must be in a tumblr bubble because how have you never seen posts with thousands notes claiming most classical literature is actually fanfiction of bible and the rest is of mythology. Like, this isn’t a hot take on tumblr, unfortunately.

Probably because I have a life outside of tumblr and curate my experience, but yes, I have seen posts about how Paradise Lost is just Bible fanfic and Dante's Inferno is self-insert fanfiction, but mostly from people who watch OSPD videos and say it as a joke. It's a major simplification of about a dozen concepts but okay, if you look at it from the point of definitions, yeah, Paradise Lost & the Divine Comedy are technically fanfiction; they are based on pre-existing work, with Dante there's irl people in scenarios they've never been in, etc etc.

Although I have never seen anyone saying any particular fanfic is a literary masterpiece that must simply be taught in academic settings, which is what that OP's post was actually implying.

And here's the thing; I think fanfic has the potential to be considered a classic. Because, what makes let's say, the Divine Comedy so important? It's not because it's old, but because it struck a nerve among the masses, it did things against the societal structure no one dared to do before, it transformed the Italian language as we know it, it's this carefully, excruciatingly crafted work in terms of sentence structure and is primarily a theological exploration. Now this stands out also because the og canon content, the Bible, is MASSIVE in influence. That thing STILL shapes social norms, conventions and expectations.

No current fanfiction now will ever come to be seen as a true classic unless the canon thing the fic is based on reaches Bible levels of influence on society, which is going to take centuries. Same can be applied to Greek Myths in general(also in both these cases the canon thing is also tied to social structure and religion which large portions of the world follow). We don't want to equate the term 'fanfiction' to that stuff because it feels like it's beyond that but technically, yeah. It's fanfiction.

But the term fanfiction itself is extremely recent, it was said first in 1939 and therefore carries temporal contexts and definitions. It's why it feels juvenile and uncomfortable assigning such a new, and initially frowned-upon term to classics. Being angry about what is and what isn't fanfiction depends entirely upon how you view the term 'fanfiction'.

For me, it is value-neutral and doesn't immediately denote lowered quality these days because at the most fundamental level, fanfiction is literary work based on pre-existing media. But if you add the current cultural context in which fanfiction is primarily written, ie., posted online by anyone and everyone with a desire to write, mostly to fulfill shipping fantasies or certain character scenarios canon didn't provide, then I can see why people would consider giving the label of fanfiction to the classics an insult or "shooting too high".

Maybe 'fanfiction' isn't fitting because of all the social stigma around it, maybe it doesn't apply because it feels like trying to apply modern story beats and terms to ancient mythology. What specifically, is making someone uncomfortable about the term 'fanfiction' on the classics? What the hell even is "fanfiction" in the first place because you could argue that The Song of Achilles is canon-compliant POV change fanfiction but its advertised as a retelling. Pride & Prejudice & Zombies also counts for fic. I think there's a good discussion to be had on what makes "fanfiction" as we know it now what it is because even I think assigning the term to Divine Comedy or Paradise Lost feels wrong. Maybe it's about intent? The classics are written with the need for social change or to make people see things different; art for life's sake. But most fic these days are purely art for art's sake- it is peak self-indulgence and self-expression.

I'm looking it up and people keep narrowing the definition of "fanfiction" as like

Amateur writing

Based on copyrighted characters

Without permission from og creator

Now that whole "copyright" concept complicates things because Romeo & Juliet? Not originally by Shakespeare. Dude borrowed characters from a different play, pretty sure he changed Juliette's name, and he wrote it when the og was only recently made. The concept of "copyright" and "author permission" is also VERY recent. What even counts as actually "amateur" because Van Gogh is considered a pro now but when he was alive he only sold one painting apparently so back then he could've been classified as "amateur"?

I have fully derailed. I forgot what I wanted to say-- Okay yeah I'm aware people say the classics are fanfiction, and in a way, yeah, it is, depending on how the individual defines "fanfiction".

[everythingsinred]

it is so sad to me that people find it difficult to see a meaningful and emotional relationship with two people without making it romantic. that you watch two people connect and immediately say “people dont do THAT for friends--” like maybe YOU dont. but platonic and familial relationships can hit so hard, so profoundly, so deeply, if you just let them. ppl ship incest so much bc they cant imagine a strong connection that isnt sexual or romantic. they cant fathom that a person might do ANYTHING for their child or their sibling or their parent, that they’d cross heaven and hell for a friend. romantic relationships are awesome but fandom sucks the enjoyment out of all non-romantic relationships by MAKING them romantic, by forcing romance and sex in places where they dont belong or arent needed. you arent elevating the relationship. you arent making it deeper. youre just adding sex. these two people love each other, but theres more than one way to love. so many of you exhaust me

[f-t-e]

I started watching SUPERNATURAL in November 2020. I know, I know. My partner and I had been isolating alone since March. The timing felt right. I went though a wild amount of upheaval and trauma over the next year and SPN was there for me through it all. It was THE show at THE time and it kept me afloat when I needed it the most. Since November 2021 I've written just about 110,000 words of SPN fanfic, a number that seems unbelievable to me, and that too has been a real blessing to my creative life, no matter what haters say. (why didn't I write my own novels in that time? Because I have a hobby, Karen, and I love it.) And I've read about 500000x that much fanfic, which has been the biggest blessing of all. (ETA: oh right, if you want to read my fic, you can find my stuff here, I wrote a fic where Dean reads books. Lots of books.)

I know I'm a nobody in this fandom but I thought on this, our #DestielDay, I would submit my own humble rec list. I've curated this very deliberately: every fic here has just about 4000 hits or less (most under 3000) and all were published in 2020 or after. So, sort of a rec list for some lesser known and newer fics, something you maybe haven't stumbled on yet. Especially thank you to @jewishcharliebradbury, her rec lists gave me a place to start back in the day and I have tried to model the depth and quality they brought to their lists. I tried to link to everyone's tumblr, but if I missed one, let me know.

Most of all, thank you to everyone who has EVER created something for this fandom, from 2005 to 2023. I am so thankful and, honestly, honored to be among your number. You're not supposed to be cringe and say a show saved your life...but SUPERNATURAL saved me, it really did. See y'all when the movie/reboot drops, to quote Ryan Gosling in The Notebook: IT WASN'T OVER, IT STILL ISN'T OVER. And I'm glad.

-----

Finale Fix-It & S15 and Beyond

What The Moon Was Saying by Amiril (@runawaymarbles)

This is hands-down one of the coolest “Dean Rescues Cas from the Empty” fics I have ever read and the concept is brilliantly structured to mirror the literal and metaphorical things Dean needs to give up and let go to get free. Every scenario is very satisfying and they make sense, is there any better feeling? Dean is very open in this, but in a believable way that still has edges. And, oh, the reunion is so good. Plus all the family stuff. Just excellent, exactly what you want in a fic like this: lovely, well-written, smart, fulfilling, all the pieces clicking, the show but better.

Awake and Annoying by skycruise

I love the use and passage of time in this one, it has some real impact, and I love the way Dean gets into the Empty (so smart, fits just right) and what I REALLY love in this one is the way it lets Dean be really clear-eyed and honest about his relationship with Sam, both the strengths and the weaknesses. And the last line, very clever and moving inverse of one of fandom’s favorite things. 

Living the life you chose by allthismusic

THEEEEE post finale Sam Winchester-Outsider-POV this fandom needs. Sam is absolutely awesome in this, the most believable, loving, realistic mix of “I knew all along” and “I had no idea” versions of Sam, landing somewhere I think that’s really true and in character. It fills in and develops so many gaps and silences in what the show let Sam know in the absolute best way. Best Brother Sam is a weakness of mine and he really shines here, there for Dean in the best ways but also coming into his own, I love it so very much. (this author also has a very great 2022 Big Bang fic, hugely recommend that one too.)

your ear to the wound that whispers by EmandFandems (@lazarusemma)

Who doesn’t love a HANDPRINT FIC?!? And boy this is such a good one. It follows Dean and his thoughts on the handprint from the first touch all the way to fixing the finale and it simply buzzes with longing and desire, tenderness and rawness. It’s great insight in lot of ways into Dean’s journey. It’s short but fulfilling and oh that very perfect last line. (this author also has a lot of great Jupernatural content.)  

Somewhere Off in the Dark by magickastiel 

Another awesome fic that traces Dean’s shifting/growing feelings for Cas from when he shows up in his hotel rooms to a HEA fix it after canon. Dean, again, is handled so deftly in this one, his confusion and sorrow at all the times Cas is slipping away from him all the way through the things he won’t let himself know. He feels really true in this one, sharp and tender in the best Dean ways. Also it has an agonizingly romantic end, you love to end up there.

Pins and Feathers by theskywasblue (@buttherewasnogod)

This author has so many freaking good SPN fics, omg it was almost impossible to pick just one to include on this list. Go treat yourself with their entire list because there’s so much good stuff there! But this one, oh I am a sucker for a finale fix-it that lets Dean be this tender. While I LOVE fics where he just jumps right into Cas’s arms (and write them lol) I also feel like this is so true to Dean too: that “maybe I misunderstood, maybe I shouldn’t say anything, maybe he doesn’t still –” And on top of all that, it’s a “they go the beach” fic and it gets the details of it so right, sand in your toes and all. Tender, amazing slow-burn, real, hot, full of heart and longing and everything unspoken and just waiting. Very satisfying!

i loved you first by kalmialatifolia

A set of four short fics that create an entire world of feeling and emotion. These feel like little whispered stories told under the covers, very atmospheric. There’s one very sexy one, a haircutting one (so good) and they’re just intimate. All together a great set and did I mention they’re in the “Cas saves himself” genre which is mmmm an underrated treasure.

no other faith is light enough for this place by anonymous 

A fix-it fic that has a particularly unique and beautiful visual of both how and why Cas comes back. The mechanics behind it are fairly standard but the way this author creates the visual of it, the sheer emotion and force behind it and how it happens, it really stood out to me and stuck with me. It’s Dean being brave enough to really feel and the way that just blossoms – lovely, aching, full-tilt wonderful.

 no proof, one touch by TakeThisWaltz (@watchinghimrakeleaves)

One thing I absolutely cannot get enough of is fic where Cas is hiding out from Dean in heaven. It just hits. And the only thing better is Dean chasing him down and the WAY he does it in this fic, methodically and – well the method (sobs) it is so endearing and OBVIOUS and gives Dean a chance to shout in all the best ways. This one is just real sweet and kind of goofy and if they have to be in heaven, I want them to still be these same two dorks.

Stay by redbrickrose

This is a post S15x18 from Cas’s POV and I think it’s very true to where he would be in the moment of getting yanked out of the Empty: resigned, hesitant about what he has in front of him, still a little in shock. And then. And then. Sweet and simple and Dean gets a chance to say, say, say it. This author has a good post series AU and a lovely little spate of S15 codas, all good. And then wrote this in real-time in the week after 15x18 Despair and right before 15x19 Inherit the Earth aired (could you just sob over the possibilities?!) and then hasn’t wrote anything since and that’s a shame but, like, yeah I get it.

like a one-two punch by Muir_Wolf (@muirmarie)

Don’t you love a short fic that feels like it’s a whole novel? This goes AU after 14x20 Moriah but it is a truly delightful twist on how Chuck could’ve reacted there and it makes Dean sharp as a knife, which is one really resonant image woven through this fic. Great imagery here and so many clever solutions for the lazy plotting of S15, including simply one of my all-time favorites in any fic ever solutions to Cas’s deal (genius) and getting rid of Chuck. Brilliant like a puzzle box yet still full of so much fucking joy.

maybe i like pleasure pain by tothewillofthepeople (@kvothes)

The fact that this was written in October 2023 and is so agonizingly good fills my heart with joy and tells me Destiel will never die lol. Cas, in particular, is great in this – he’s having a hard time adjusting to being in a body and with all the fuzz of the world. I love fics where Cas struggles with coming back from the Empty and this uses a really unique approach to it: Cas facing sensory overload and not knowing how to feel but wanting it all. Lovely, hot, Dean is just right in this too.

Earlier Canon (pre S15)

Proverbs 13:12 by starlingcas (@angelcasendgame)

Many might say I am biased because Renu has beta’ed everything I have written in the SPN fandom and they can read my brain and make everything I write better. But it’s not just that. Renu has done something beautiful and delicate in this fic, which is about Dean and Cas getting trapped in a net together (forced proximity trope, yes please) and weaves a web of its own; pulling you in just as they are pulled together. This is set mostly in early S14 (before fixing the finale in the most heart-healing way) and captures that feeling so well. There’s so much that’s unsaid between them yet still conveyed and Renu absolutely nails that, along with the tender longing that was always there. This is a fic to relish.

you may tire of me (as our december sun is setting) by deludedfantasy

You know how the show just sometimes is like “uh so anyway uh then Cas…uh…left.” and it just doesn’t make one lick of sense? FINALLY FINALLY a fic where Dean says “I’ll go with you,” and then goes because he actually would do that. This is a post Tombstone fic so it is exactly where/when he WOULD go and it is tender and hesitant and aching in just all the ways it would be between the two of them at this time. It’s about needing to keep someone in sight, it’s about having another chance to say something so important, it’s slow and soft and just right for the characters in this place. I could read this one about 100 times.

the anatomy of flightless birds by cowlovely (@dollhousemary)

This fic is basically the way you feel when you get all cozy and snug underneath your favorite blanket. This is a domestic-life-in-the Bunker S9 fic where everyone behaves like they are in character and not just like they have to get Cas off screen because the writers panicked. You’ll just want to curl up in this fic and savor it the way you wrap your fingers around a hot beverage on a very cold day, there’s no better way to describe it.

virtue by JenTheSweetie

I think I’ve read this about 100 times and it still gets me everytime? It’s a five things fic about Dean and Cas hooking up and it’s all you’ve ever wished for. This is set in an amorphous S8 and it is not just agonizingly hot but also romantic and very funny. It feels really in character! Sam is hilarious, Dean is clueless but bowled over and letting himself be swept up, Cas is delighting in every second and smarter than he lets on and it ALL feels fated and lovely and sexy and just splendid. (this author only has 3 SPN fics but they are all so good and if you try sometimes, well you just might find is an absolutely brilliant deconstruction of Dean learning the differences between “needing” and “wanting.”)

Romance at the Motel 6 by shelia_amour 

This fic makes me feel like Stefon from SNL. This fic has everything: Cas and Sam pretending to be married, just the right amount of jealous Dean, Dean randomly pretending to be married to Cas, Dean realizing maybe this isn’t so fake after all, motel vibes, Cas in Dean’s clothes, Cas getting bee slippers. If you are not sold on this already, we are very different people. So good, aches just right. (set in a kind of “whenever” of canon, but I like to put it somewhere in S8.)

que sera sera by Purple_Starflower (@hauntedpearl)

The epitome of how fanfic unfolds for us all the things that COULD happen. You can’t PROVE to me Dean and Cas never snuck off to snuggle and feed Dean’s touch-starvation early in S13. I had to check when I finished because I just couldn’t believe this fic was under 4000 words because it feels so full of touch, longing, the things unspoken, and all the ways Dean was reaching, reaching, reaching. The best kind of ache, and everything by this author is lovely. 

the hard edge that you’re settling for by lesspopped (@trekkiedean)

This is some S10 Demon!Dean that made my stomach hurt and my heart ache and I absolutely loved it and I absolutely hated it and it all felt so REAL with who Demon!Dean was and could have been. There’s a TW for mildly dubious consent in this, but to me, Cas was so agonizingly true to who he was/where he was at this point in canon too. This fic is gloriously, claustrophobically intimate. I say unbearable because as a reader you know that this closeness, this intimacy, is what Dean wants/craves/deserves but can only give himself as a demon and the author does an exquisite job at getting all that across. Hurts so good! 

four of swords by sundryvillians (eurythmix) (@perenial)

Can the world ever have enough post 12x12 fic? The answer is, of course, no. Dean and Cas bake bread and in the soft space of creating something with their own hands, get so close to the words Cas said. It’s about healing and anger and making something just because you are so tired of everything breaking. If that alone isn’t enough to convince you, let me also throw in this is another one of those “possible off-screen moments in canon” that gives them something honest and tender and raw and it feels so very possible. 

Fifteen Prayers From the Faithless by koyas_cat

Short, achy, that sweet sting. A set of prayers for Cas from the beginning to the end, full of all the things Dean doesn’t let himself say outloud and just reflecting the changes in their connection over alllll the years. So good.

[lol-jackles]

You do know that FBBC are still heavily producing and distributing beer, right? Before you start patting yourself on the back that the original brewery/land is being sold, you might want to get clued into the fact that distribution has been expanded to San Antonio and recently to Houston. The company and brand are positioning themselves to expand further. Don't think they will go back to the cute craft brewery, but as you have pointed out, craft breweries are not that profitable. Looks like they are going for a stronger business model.

You go on about the whole YANA thing. I have never understood why a select few in the fandom actually became jealous about a charity? Seems so small minded and petty. Regardless, YANA still exists and continues to do good things.

Yes I know about their distribution, I'm the one who pointed out 5 years ago all those bottling and canning equipment and the end products weren't for the taproom customers but meant for distribution because the Ackles were trying to go big because they want to make actual profit despite originally claiming that they would only sell beer at the brewery (X).

What did you think the $1000 membership package was about?  To get SPN fans to regularly go to FBBC to keep it afloat so they can keep making beer on site and then ship off site. Quite a turnaround when Gino cast dispersion toward SPN fans and said there will be no beer named after a "corny tv show" (X)

According to Gino, they plan to resume producing their own beer again once they find a location in Austin.

After they bought these top on the line brewing equipment and are now selling. That sounds like a "stronger business model" to you?

Surely you don't think the Ackles are going to sell off all the brewery equipment only to turn around and buy new equipment for the alleged 2nd location?  At best they should just open a small scale taproom and put Gino in there as the glorified bar tender.

Do you know people who had their beer made by somebody else?  I have. They have to pay for everything, or make compromises.  There is no in between. A specific yeast strain the contractors don't use?  Then you're going to have to pay for that, and the labor to keep it going, or do it yourself.  Oh wait, they can't because they closed down FBBC.

Breweries don't close because they'll make more money from contract breweries, if that's the case then why open your own brewery in the first place?

Let me break it down using another real life example:

If parents have a couple of kids going to the same college and overlap each other, instead of paying dorm fees or renting an apartment, they would buy a townhouse for their child/ren and rent out rooms to other students, which pays for the mortgage.  Then when the last child graduates, they sell the house for a profit.

See the difference between owning a brewery that doubles as a contract brewery (your house) vs paying everything to a contract brewery (college)?

What's going on is there is a saturation of craft breweries.  It's like in the late 90s when there was a huge surge in openings of comic shops.  Every collector dreamed of running his own place and thought a love for the product was enough to be successful. The market became saturated.  A couple years later, the trend reversed and it seemed another shop was closing every other week. The difference in making it or not largely rested on whether the owner had the skill set to run a business. Foresight. Customer relations. General business principles. And of course, the ones who had adequate funding. The market decided who made it and who didn’t.

That's what is going on in the current beer industry.  The hobbyists who thought they could be successful because they loved brewing but lacked the skill set to run a business are beginning to fall.

LOL nobody is jealous of YANA, people continue to be amused by it because of how badly it was executed and then failed. If YANA still exist and continues to do good thing, it's only because Jared bailed it out after both Misha and Jensen abandoned the public promise as mentioned here and here.

I remember back in my day a craft beer was “hey there’s a beer that’s $3.50 a bottle instead of $2 and it’s way better!”

Nowadays it’s “this craft beer is sourced with water collected from the Himalayas by free range howler monkeys and filtered through the wings of butterflies.  Oh and we can’t bother to be original so it’s an IPA loaded with hops.  $8 please”.

[trekkiedean]

while I'm being earnest: the thing is, this show is not consistent about most things. I've talked in the past about how, for instance, there are arcs that just don't make sense when viewed through a purely watsonian lens, or episodes that are a lot more effective out of context. the writers' room was not particularly cohesive. continuity is a joke. characterization changes from one episode to the next. (I've heard that they didn't have a writers' bible, and I have no idea whether that's true, but frankly I think I'd be more surprised if it wasn't true.) and that's before we get into how actors' and directors' choices can bring new layers to the episodes as written, or even seem to say something completely different from the episodes as written!

I think that's a big reason why this fandom is so huge and rich and has lasted so long: there's room for so many interpretations. not only is it possible to pick and choose which parts of canon to keep, I'd argue that to some extent it's actually necessary to do so; there are so many inconsistencies and continuity errors and internal contradictions that you'll just never be able to come up with a grand unified theory of supernatural. fandom lives in the inconsistencies and the continuity errors and the internal contradictions! and with spn, there are so many of them, and so much of the show, that there are very few theories and headcanons and interpretations that can't be justified in some way. yes, there are some I like more than others, and yes, there are some I think are better justified than others! but in general, even if I completely disagree with someone's take, I can also see where they're getting it from. I may think, and point out, that there are things that contradict their take, but they'll have some examples of things that support it. which one of us is right? both of us! neither of us! two supernatural fans, three opinions, baby!

but the downside of the fact that there are very few interpretations that can't be justified is that…there are very few interpretations that can't be justified. like, I'm sorry to break this to everyone, but no voice is ever going to ring out from the heavens and declare conclusively that one of us is the winner of fandom. (and even if it did, my people don't generally put much stock in that kind of thing.) someone's interpretation being different from yours, even wildly different, even different in a way you don't like, is not necessarily a sign that they haven't watched the show, or that they don't enjoy it, or that they're stupid, or that you're coming from a place of cool logic and rationality and they're just making shit up and projecting, or that they want to spite you personally. I think all of us (and I totally include myself in this) could stand to get a little more comfortable with that. because at the end of the day what matters a lot more than whether you think someone is right or not is how the two of you treat each other. publicly mocking and belittling someone because you don't like their take on a fictional character is just not the way to keep a fandom going.

[smaeemo]

Supernatural season 16

For me personally I think that a spn s16 could either be revolutionary or devastating. We all saw the ending and that in itself was a huge let down for so many reasons that I will not get into right now, but the idea of a s16 has the potential to be literally a revolutionary part of modern and past media or absolute dog shit, and I think everyone involved knows that. Supernatural in itself had such accidental potential in so many ways SPECIFICALLY WITH DESTIEL (doy), but I think that in general if the writers were to actually explore it like it had been the plan the whole time it could change the way we as people see media as a whole. For a show like supernatural that started out the way it did as a show made for men about men by men in 2005, having a queer validation and entire season based on queer understanding and/or healthy male relationships while also approaching the idea of interpersonal relationships because they are in heaven and can talk to everyone in the way that they should have been able to in the show, that would change the way that fantasy shows are measured. Right now, more than anything queer teens need to be shown that they are valid in so many ways, with everytung that is happening in congress and the ever encroachin tiktok ban, having more representation on TV is what we as queer youth need. However that is also a reason as to why they may not give us that, exactly because of how political it can get, and CW is also like #dying so that's not great (lol). But ingeneral (now I'm just rambling, but I swear there is some coherent points in here), I Think that trying to do this canonically could be revolutionary. But if its just another big bad, I don't want it. Well I do. Because I am an addict to that horrible media. But you get the point.

I feel a bit insecure talking about SPN like this given that I wasn't even 1 when the first season came out lol. And I have only been in the fandom/a fan of the show for 5 years.. But you know I am always looking to expand, so yykyk..

Alright. love you lots.

XOXO

[sak-supernatural]

Ok so I did something I said I wasn’t going to do. I started watching Hannibal. I’ve known vaguely of the shows existence for years, and of course about Hannigram, but I was scared to watch it and just diligently avoided content about the show. Now that I’m in it though there’s no going back and I feel like I’ve just unlocked a huge new section in fandom (specifically AO3). And honestly it’s nowhere near as bad as my mum made me fear (she hates these types of things) and as a SPN fan and an avid fanfiction reader (going on nearly 10 years now 😱) I’ve seen/read way worse.

[songliili]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

thank you @happiness-of-the-pursuit for tagging me

How many works do you have on ao3? only 10 as of now, but i hope it'll be 13 by the end of the year

What's your total ao3 word count? 107,767

What fandoms do you write for? rwrb and supernatural. although it's mostly rwrb as of now

Top five fics by kudos:

we all have a hunger - Henry is a porn star, Alex is a fan.

bro, you're fucking hung! - Alex is fascinated by Henry's huge dick.

Fill My Stocking - Alex wants some attention and Henry has to get creative.

you should floss more - Dean goes to the dentist and is his usual disaster bi self. Lucky for him, his dentist doesn't mind.

footage of (y)our love - Alex and Henry get married, and 2/3 of the Super Six documented their love story.

Do you respond to comments? yes, i do my best at not leaving them unanswered!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? probably I Had Some Time (With You) because of the mcd tag and the kind of open ending with claire and jody that i left just in case i decide to write claire's story. but i also think that dean and cas had a soft beautiful and loving end, so yeah it's sad but i don't think it's a sad fic? more like haunting in a positive way (this makes me sound so pretentious but i just love that story so much and i'd love for more people to read it it too)

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i genuinely don't know? all of them have happy endings imo... probably psau1 tho. simply because i'm writing the sequel and i know they're even more happy lmao.

Do you get hate on fics? thankfully i don't!

Do you write smut? yep! and i thought i wasn't able to. (peep at my two most popular fics being rated E and the second being just pwp)

Craziest crossover: i don't think it's crazy but I Had Some Time (With You) kind of is a crossover with the last of us? i mixed up tlou and spn.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i know of, but i don't think anyone would steal my stuff, i'm nobody

Have you ever had a fic translated? ... well............. eight years ago i wrote a fic for a kpop group and before orphaning it someone asked me permission to translate it. i don't know if they ever did it, and i can't check cause i don't remember the title so i can't even look it up

Have you ever co-written a fic before? i've started writing a fic with @zeppelinmixtape a while ago, we should pick it back up.

All time favorite ship? destiel and firstprince, obviously

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? probably the great dean court off, and it's a shame cause i love it and i want to finish it cause i have the ending clear in my head, but i changed so much as a writer that i think i'd have to rework it all to avoid a stark contrast between then and now/the future.

What are your writing strengths? once @cactusdragon517 told me that my italian brain "lends so much to it. It is so beauful and the way you write it feels like reading something SACRED." (yes, i copy-pasted their message cause i saved it in a note on my phone for when i need a ego boost)

What are your writing weaknesses? i'm verbose but at the same time i skim on things. small things turn into big things and fics that can be under 5k turn into 10k, 'cause small, insignificant details and context in conversations are needed; but not descriptions. for the life of me i can't remember that people aren't in my head and they need to know who's talking and what the place they're in looks like.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? i'm a sucker for it, but if they're written in a language i know i will be critic of the translation used - and if i know the author i will suggest a translation that in my opinion is better.

First fandom you wrote in? aforementioned kpop fandom. no, i will not disclose what group or pairing.

Favorite fic you've written? I Had Some Time (With You) and we all have a hunger. but also mh fp, ciayaq? and psau2 that live in my wips folder. (and if y'all want to tell me what's your favourite of my silly little fics, let me know!)

i guess i have to tag 20 people now, i don't know who's done this already so forgive me if you did.

(mae, chrissy, consider your previous tags as tagging for the game lmao)

@father-salmon @underwaterninja13 @leojfitz @read-and-write- @littlemisskittentoes @galitzine-nick @inexplicablymine @affectionatelyrs @gayrootvegetable @wordsofhoneydew @emmalostinwonderland @rockyroadkylers @three-drink-amy @theprinceandagcd @imyourhoneybeespn @princehgejfmw @absolute-audacity @firenati0n

[kdaught]

Hope you don't mind me randomly dropping into your asks but since you asked me in the tags if I've started watching Supernatural I decided to send you an update on my spn (and wincest/destiel) journey.

I've now (re)watched s1 and started s2, and some of the thougs I had when I last watched it have returned to me. I started watching it 9 years ago (quit in the beginning/middle of s8) bc I thought Destiel would be like Johnlock which I loved, but I was disappointed bc I felt that the fandom had hugely overhyped how big Castiel was as a character. I even found an old tweet of mine saying that while I do somewhat ship Destiel it's the most overrated ship I know of. I also remember feeling weirdly like the canon WANTED me to ship wincest which I, still 17 and Pure in my Moral Fandom Opinions did not want to do. I also found a tweet from me saying that Wincest is a ship I'd never ship. Anyway.

My current diagnosis is: yeah the canon does want me to ship it. I don't know what to make of it. I keep comparing it to Defan which is so interesting bc I feel like (headcanonically) Defan wants each other despite being brothers, and the brothers part just adds a level of twistedness. Wincest on the other hand wants each other BECAUSE they're brothers. Their dynamic is like, Incestuous with a capital I. And more emotionally so, like levels and levels of weirdness that is so even without being sexual, but I do think the sexual level is easy to add. But so far I'm very interested in their dynamic but I don't Ship it, more like. Observe whatever is going on. It feels too weird to read fanfics or anything about so far bc as I said, it's so deeply incestuous. Not to say I wont, but for now those are my thoughts on it.

Also I've been an outside observer of the spn fandom for years now, and I don't want to pick sides with Destiel vs Wincest, just observing the fandom is funny enough. But tbh I'm afraid sooner or later I'll get sucked into it bc supernatural fandom seems like. The hellpit of tumblr. Pun intended and all the love to the spn fans who continue keeping me entertained.

omg hi friend! So happy you decided to send me an ask and I'm glad you're enjoying yourself with spn so far!

LOL, the part about spn wanting you to ship wincest is so funny to me. Eric Kripke, the creator of season 1-5 (and cowriter of some episodes after that as far as I'm aware) once said: "Turns out I have a thematic which is tight relationships between friends/brothers with unstated homoerotic subtexts." in reference to spn, so yeah. There's that, haha.

I can definitely see the defan comparison! I think both can be equally fucked up at times but with wincest it's.... definitely more emotional. Also fun that you picked up on the emotional incestous undertones with wincest, haha. We a two whole set of tags for that:

I love this fandom so much, hah. Let yourself be dragged into the pit, ezra, we have so much content!

[eisforeidolon]

https://www.tumblr.com/eisforeidolon/734571018525540352/some-people-in-this-fandom-have-absurd-projection

I love how it’s hellers and AAs always throwing a fit because someone does Barn Scene (or adjacent) ops with J2, claiming Jensen is traumatized over the death of fictional character, when they are the ones who over-step boundaries with Jensen and Jared, the actual people, like posing with them"gutted" shirt with Jared, or trying to force Jensen into destiel poses with Misha, or wearing things in ops like shirts that say, "Jensen Ackles is my baby daddy."

J2 know the barn scene is very meaningful for many fans and they've said it was for them, too. And from some accounts, they’ll even chose that pose when someone asks then to do whatever they want. They clearly aren’t bothered. Meanwhile, you can see Jensen death stare when he’s asked to get too intimate with Misha or a fan in ops, and we’ve heard accounts of him altering the asked for position enough that the fan is not getting exactly what they wanted (because it was crossing a line).

Crying or getting faux outraged about fans joking about the barn scene is ridiculous, especially since Jensen himself mimed joking about the rebar going through Dean on the first Gold Panel he and Jared did when cons came back after COVID (Denver 2021). Jensen grabbing his shirt and pulling it out as if he’d been impaled, and laughing after, is not the action of someone who is "traumatized." Being annoyed by the manner in which his character died and being in a "glass cage of emotion" Rob Burgundy style over it are two very different things.

People need to learn the difference between being annoyed over real-life overstepping of people’s boundaries (or at least common courtesy) and simply projecting their own outrage onto an actor because they don’t like a pose (especially based off of a joke the actor themselves made). People in this fandom need to grow the F up.

Also, I get that I’m not totally free of projecting either when I see Jensen looking "dead inside" during a heller op, but my observation is also based off of him specifically saying he and Misha have been asked to do things that are crossing the line (and he literally just mentioned that again on the Hawaii main panel last weekend). Barn op outrage is purely based off of fan's own emotional reaction over disliking that Dean died and/or the fact that he loved Sam more than anyone else.

Exactly.

Jensen has said he's proud of the barn scene, multiple times. Jensen has joked about the rebar specifically, multiple times, while laughing. Sure, Jensen has said multiple times he was taken aback by Dean dying the initial pitch - and every single one of those times he also said he was talked around by people he respected the opinions of! Jensen has said he doesn't see D/C as part of Dean's story, multiple times. Jensen has specifically cited things fans have asked for in ops with Misha as being uncomfortable, multiple times. The most he's ever given them is variations on 'interpret what you want, we don't have to agree on what's important about SPN'.

When we read into Jensen's expressions in ops, we're not just projecting what we want to believe he thinks. We're considering the totality of what he's said - not cherry-picking only the bits we like or deciding he must actually think the exact fucking opposite of what he's said because we do.

Also? When we ask him (and Jared) to act out a scene literally straight out of the canon that they played huge parts in creating the specifics of even beyond acting? We're respecting them as people and professional actors. In a way shit like those creepy t-shirts, like treating them as posable blow-up dolls, like wanting them to act out fanfic, like paying them to hold signs and insisting it means something about them personally, like insisting they don't understand their own show and their own acting as well as some randos on the internet do? Never ever fucking does.

[ijustwantaspnnamepls]

I need to I need to rant about this friggen spn finale. And not because of the finale-- but because of the fandom. Ya’ll are killing me.

Why does everyone seem so surprised that this show ended with Sam and Dean? This show has always been about the two of them-- It started with them, it makes sense that it would end with them-- and the whole friggen middle was about them, too. Were Cas and Jack a huge part? Yes. Obviously. But everyone in the show acknowledged that if push came to shove the brothers would always choose each other over the world. The whole ordeal with Chuck only proved that-- they only sacrificed each other after the had sacrificed the world-- they had nothing left to give up but their relationship. Thats the only reason they offered it.

Also-- no offence, this show has always, always prioritized platonic love over romantic? If Destiel became canon, Castiel would have died within the next episode or so because that's what happens to all the love interests ever. And this is also my problem with wincest-- it would have never been romantic. The main emotions of this show have never been romantic. The only time they ever were was with Jess and she literally died in the first episode.

Also also, their endings were very fitting? Deans happy ending was to live his life with Sam, and he did. Sam’s happy ending was to live a normal life. He did. And in the end, they both were together in Heaven. (not as soul mates, because jack ripped down the walls and stuff buts thats a diff discussion) This is the only way they would have both managed to get their happy ending, and be together in the end.

Obviously, the finale had its problems. But yall are acting like this finale was the worst thing in the world. Like they completely uprooted the whole point of the show. Chill. Thats not the problem with it. Its like, the opposite-- Cass is with Jack, Dean is with Sam, everybody’s happy. I love vanilla but this is like, the classic metaphoric vanilla ending.

The whole relationship between the brothers is Sam learning to Prioritize Dean’s form of love-- his co-dependency and over protectiveness, while Dean learns to respect Sam’s form of love, a little more independent and based on trust. Instead they both get their form of love, instead of giving it up to show that they love each other more than they love their... love. I hope that made sense.

Thus, they both get what they want and don’t have to give up a part of themselves for each other. Its too much cake.

Regardless, it was still a fairy tale level of happy endings.

Edit: this whole last part I added like two seconds after I posted sorry

There was literally no other way to end the show, and adding a secondary relationship, like cas and/or jack would have taken away from the fact that the show has always been about them. The only time they came close to introducing a secondary relationship was when they showed Bobby, but even then he was just there to explain the perfectness of haven. He was a good character choice for that role because he was important to Dean, but that role wasn’t created because of his importance to Dean.

I keep reading posts about how the theme was found family-- also lies. This show was never about Found family or real family-- It’s A Terrible Life (Dean Smith and Sam Wesson ep) shows us that its not about how they’re related by blood-- it’s just because they’re Sam and Dean. Sam and Dean choose each other over their parents too. Blood has nothing to do with it. Cass and Jack show that it’s not about found Family. because they choose each other over that too. and Adam shows us it’s not about brotherly love.

So in the end, obviously it was going to end with Sam and Dean. Other than Bobby and like, child dean, no one else is in the episode. Because it’s not about romance, and its not about family, it’s about Sam and Dean. It’s always been about Sam and Dean. When did people lose sight of this?

[loverboy-havocboy]

Are we doing closet cloneshipper confessions here? If so, hi

I've been in the tumblr fandom communities for over a decade and joined the sw community right before the last season of tcw premiered. It legit never occurred to me that anyone would have an issue with clonecest - spn was still running and wincest was like the second most popular ship there so it seemed like standard fanfic fodder until the antis had a huge meltdown a few months later and drove half the people I followed out of fandom completely.

And then tbb started and some of the same people who had such an issue with clonecest decided they hated all of tbb too. I was beyond pissed at that point so I started a little tbb side blog to spite them. I didn't really have any tbb cloneships at the time so I sorta ended up with a non-ship tbb blog by accident and it got a lot bigger for me than the original page and now I have friends through that who are def not fans of the cloneshipper life and have no idea that I ship.

At first it was fine because my ships were totally separate from tbb anyway but lately I've really been feeling the crosshunt feels and I don't feel like I can say anything about it at this point, you know? It feels like I've been lying even though that wasn't my intent at all - it really just didn't come up as an issue until now. If someone had asked me if I ship clones, I would have said so straight up but no one ever did and now I'm afraid to be the one to bring it up.

I don't care what rando antis say to me. They have no power over me. But I don't want to lose my friends over it. I don't know how they'd react. I know they don't like clonecest and I'd never ask them to participate in something they don't ship but I genuinely don't know if they'd be more ship and let ship about it or if they'd insta block me for it. I want to think they'd be cool about it but some people who seemed so reasonable before got so out of control when the anti clonecest purge went down before so I don't know what to think.

oh anon, i'm sorry. i will give you my 2 cents but i am just a little guy, ykwim?

i think it would be so hard to lose friendships you've cultivated over such a period of time, people you care about. but at the same time.. are they the kind of people you're sure you want to be friends with if you're so afraid to voice an opinion about fictional characters? i mean, cloneshipping isn't even a real life moral issue, as much as antis want to treat it like one. if they turn on you for that.. they'd probably turn on you for something equally superficial eventually, right?

so i think engaging in things that make you happy will make your life better than trying to please judgemental people in the long run.

[laf-outloud]

I’ve been thinking. After reading about people’s reactions to Jared and the discussions about CE needing to enforce their own rules, and rude fans, something really stands out for me.

Jared truly gets the most extreme reactions from the SPN fandom, both positive and negative, and the “reasons” are just as extreme.

You have the people who “hate” him, or say they do. Some even go out of their way to be rude to his face. But, their reasons for hating him are actually insane. They hate him because he’s the lead (instead of Jensen), because he was “in the way” of destiel, (blocking Jensen and Misha’s characters from baging 🙄), or because they attribute beliefs or actions to him that are contradictory to how he actually behaves. And they take everything he says in bad faith, attributing the worst intentions possible to the things he says. In short, most people’s reasons for “hating” Jared are either jealousy-based or fabricated. It’s pathetic really, especially how vehement some are about hating him when it’s not even the real him, or it’s for something that isn’t his fault (he didn’t force the writers to have Dean impaled on rebar). Finally, people who claim to hate him for his actions (pranks, the arrest, “mean” jokes) excuse the same or similar actions in Jensen snd Misha.

People who have more “legitimate” reasons for disliking him (maybe his personality irritates them, or they don’t like his acting style or shows/movies), are generally not insane about it. They are more apathetic about him. This is fair enough because not everyone vibes with everyone. But it’s funny that for people who maybe just aren’t fans for non/fandom wank reasons probably don’t actually hate him. They’re just ignore him.

Then you have the people who love him. They love him for his mental health campaigns. They love him for how sweet he is to fans: listening intently, hugging tight, going that one extra step to make them feel special. Many of these people go up to him with stories of how he has done something to actively make their lives better or help give them strength, etc. The thing is, the love is based on his actual actions. We obviously don’t really know him (he could be a huge asshole behind the scenes, though I doubt it), but the things people like him for are actual things he has done, or it’s because of who he appears to be.

It’s just so crazy to me that he gets the most vitriolic hate (out of the SPN crew), when it’s mostly for things that aren’t even in his control. It’s wild.

Anyway, I have “met” Jared a few times at cons. I’ve never told him I love him, and I probably never will, because that’s not a term I can throw around lightly. And I don’t actually know him on any personal level. But what I can say is that my “worst” interactions with him were him seeming tired and subdued, while my best have been … so good that they still brought me little moments of happy for weeks after they happened.

I guess my point to almost this ramble was, I hate that he gets people treating him crappy on occasion, but I’m thankful that Jared also get huge amounts of very genuine appreciation from fans, too. And I’m sure for him, the good far outweighs the bad.

I’m sorry this got so long.

What was your impression of Jared at Fan X? Did anything stand out for you?

Thank you for sharing! I think it's crazy how people hate him for the dumbest things that he's not at all responsible for (like the writing on SPN), or really weren't that big a deal (like his bar fight).

I actually see the apathetic fans much like I do Jared fans, i.e., people who consider Jared as a human being and then determine whether the like him or not.

As for my experience, I'm not really an emotional person, so I tend to look at things from a more analytical point of view. I found Jared to be extremely smart in the way he approaches people. He gets down on their level, he looks them in the eye and speaks to each person directly, and I suspect (based on his comments on my jacket in both ops), that he finds something unique about each person that he can focus on to help him remember them (at least, for a little while).

He's also really great at adapting to different people; whether they need humor or empathy, he can pull those reactions out of his hat on a dime. All if this, of course, personalizes and elevates each person's experience with him.

My photo op experience was pretty much as I expected, he was very friendly and very welcoming (with his huge smile), said that my jacket was his favorite, and thanked me for coming.

(I'll be keeping my jacket forever and if Jared ever comes back to Salt Lake, it's going right back on!)

As for my auto experience, I was so focused on telling him how much I appreciated and loved both yeehaw shows this last year (particularly Windy) that I didn't really give him a chance to get a word in. LOL! He did promise to pass along my love, though!

Gen's line was much shorter so I had a chance to ask about the different kinds of animals they now have at home and at the ranch. (It was actually smaller than I thought with goats, donkeys, chickens, and dogs, but they are getting a few Highland cows soon.)

What's funny, is that when thinking of what I could talk to Jared about, it wasn't a very long list (all of the question I disregarded would have required a M&G). But I had many more questions I could have asked Gen if we had the time! She was absolutely delightful and very approachable.

I think the highlight of my day was the panel. Jared and Gen were so comfortable on stage, joking with each other, joking with the audience, keeping the conversation moving... I know Jared's been doing this for a while, but Gen was right there with him. She was much more animated than what I'd previously seen of her at JIB. I really hope they continue to do panels together.

[justjensenanddean]

Jensen Ackles | JIBCon, Solo Panel, (Rome, Italy, August 28 2022)

(x)

Jensen panel. Will he do any more theatre? No, that was a huge mistake. A musical? “A musical??? ” (x)

Would Jensen do more theater work? “Nope, Few Good Men was a mistake, that was 120 pages long and I was on like 100!” And musical? “Um, maybe” You sing so well, and act! “Yeah, I can do both…”  (x)

He likes challenges, so maybe… but he doesn't plan that far in the future  (x)

Jensen recently saw Music Man with Hugh Jackman. Was blown away. It was a lot of fun. Made him think if he wants to do that. Answer? “Nah. I’d have to do jazz hands.” But we’ll see. He doesn’t know what he’ll do in 6 months.  (x)

He loves directing because it makes him think in a different perspective and it’s challenging. So maybe to the musical. The only musical he’s ever done is West Side Story.  (x)

One thing Jensen doesn’t miss is being trapped in the Impala with Jared after Jared had a burrito. Yellow Fever is an ep that comes to mind because it was funny through and through. But funniest scene is “the whole show”. (x)

Jensen panel: Every scene over the past 15 years was the funniest scene #jib12  (x)

(x)

They were able to do risky storylines and go meta thanks to the fans. Because we stuck with them.  (x)

Q about iconic lines. Does he realize they’re iconic when he reads the script or when he films them? Both. Sometimes it will come up filming. SB was more on the page but one day Kripke was in set & he & Kripke brainstormed lines on the spot. #jib12  (x)

There’s a freedom to be creative. Healthy work environment, The Boys is not a toxic set “of which there are a lot of”. Sometimes he doesn’t realize a line will be iconic, other times one will not hit.  (x)

Jensen thinks the writers just wrote SB that way and hoped he can deliver. Doesn’t think Kripke demanded it. Kripke came up with “can’t go in dry” on the spot. Jensen mentions Paul Reiser had a lot of iconic lines too.  (x)

The audition scene for SB was the scene with The Legend, Paul Reiser. So many good lines. (x)

The legend dialogue was the audition scene for Jensen.  (x)

How was it being Dean again? “Like slipping into an old pair of sneakers. Just leaning against that car again…” There will not be a lot of visible Dean in it though. They reshot some of the Pilot. John Schowalter (sp?) stepped in 4 Sigriccia.He’s excited for us to see it.  (x)

Favorite beer in Family Business? He doesn't know, because there's a rotation of beer types and he hasn't been home for 2 months... but he likes Grackle  (x)

Fave beer on tab? Since he hasn’t been home in 2 months, he doesn’t know what’s on tab right now, but the Grackle is always on and it’s his go to. “But don’t drink too much of it, it’ll get ya.”  (x)

(x)

‘Is it time for apple juice? Someone let me know when it’s 12’ (x)

Does he want to be the lead on another long running show? Yes, he has no problem with it. A few projects in early development with him as lead, particularly a movie he’s excited about. But he doesn’t talk about things until they’re a sure thing, so no teasers. (x)  He just likes good stories, to entertain. That’s his thing. (x)

JENSEN TALKED ABOUT THERE BEING PROJECTS. AT LEAST ONE MOVIE. AND THE LEAD ON A TV SHOW. NOTHING FOR SURE YET. BUT THEY'RE SITTING DOWN AT TABLES. HE JUST DROPPED THAT BOMB? (x)

‘I would take a lead again, if the story was right’ (x)

Jensen wants “apple juice” and two of the three bottles are actual apple juice. “You tricked me. What is going on here.”  (x)

‘It’s actually apple juice - you tricked me!’ (x)

At his first con in the UK, a multi fandom con, he thought he was just a face in the crowd and Jensen and Wayne were overwhelmed with the reception. First time Jensen thought “we might get another season”  (x)

How is Jensen practicing his voice drop? He never had any proper training, never did any work, it just naturally went down. It’s JDMs fault. “He’s so cool. I wanna be him when I grow up. I’m still waiting for that.”  (x)

Jensen says that in the first season of SPN admired Jeffrey Dean Morgan so much that he wanted to be like him when he grows up. (x)

He doesn't think his singing voice has changed that much over the years, his speaking voice has changed more. And he never took singing lessons or anything like that!  (x)

[bluewonderer]

Answer the Questions and Tag 5 Fanfic Authors

beep boop another tag game!

Tagged by @tobyaudax Hi!!

1. How did you get into writing fanfiction?

Obsession over blorbos. Next question.

(Read: needed to whump Hiiro Yui from Gundam Wing. Also needed to crossover Star Wars with Sailor Moon, can't explain why.)

2. How many fandoms have you written in?

(Opens AO3)

Nine, I think. (DCTV, One Piece, SPN, JJK, Daredevil, Bungo Stray Dogs, Trigun, and Doctor Who and Dresden Files by virtue of being crossovers with One Piece and Daredevil respectively).

I wrote a lot when I was younger that I didn't post or posted on ff.net and I don't remember my username. Sailor Moon, Gundam Wing, The Pretender, The Invisible Man, Star Wars, Ronin Warriors, etc.

3. How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

I've been writing since I was probably twelve or thirteen. But not consecutively, with many years of almost no writing activity in between bursts of creativity. So, probably about 8-10 years total?

4. Do you read or write more fanfiction?

I read way more. It's my most prominent source of escapism.

5. What is one way you’ve improved as a writer?

I'm not sure! I remember very intentionally working on dialogue and humor one year, which is where Sure Hard to Handle and The Good in You came from. Not sure I've made any significant strides in other areas. Still kind of dramatic and prosey, I think.

6. What’s the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

I try not to get into intense research situations lmao. I don't think I've researched anything deeply weird. What is purple sage, ship blueprints, medieval armor, animal/dog experimentation, collars, historical female pirates, worldwide New Year's traditions, etc., I don't remember others.

7. What’s your favorite type of comment to receive on your work?

I like it when someone tells me their favorite line and it ends up being one of my favorites as well. I love it when someone tells me that they've re-read my fic. That's such a huge compliment?

8. What’s the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

I don't think I really write any? Grief, maybe. A little bit of mindfuck stuff in a recent work is as wild as I've gotten, I believe.

9. What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

I think I've stayed safely in my wheelhouse so I'm not sure. Probably something with plot, because I tend to write one shots. I also think it's difficult to write dialogue for someone who is--OK, well, I don't even know how to describe him and that's half my problem. I find it difficult to write dialogue for Sukuna, OK? Fuck him.

10. What is the easiest type?

Oneshots featuring fluff, humor, some angst, dialogue/banter, character study, etc. I think I'm even alright at smut, it just takes me a long time to write it.

11. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

Been using the Ulysses app recently. And Google docs. When? Never. I'm so tired.

(Usually, if it's a good day and I'm on a writing roll, in the mornings between 5AM and 7AM, and in the evenings around 9PM before I get too sleepy. Best times are Saturday mornings.)

12. What is something you’ve been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

A multi-chaptered, plotty fic. Also original fiction.

13. What made you choose your username?

Because I'm full of whimsy and melancholy. No, I genuinely don't remember. I think I was possibly thinking of birds or balloons, and how they wander ponderously through the blue sky. But then I typoed wonder instead of wander and here we are.

TAGGING! @ansimplegoose @anarchycox @harpyienkind @nixie-deangel

[prettyflyshyguy]

Ok place your bets how angry am I going to get at spn for their handling of S4 Sam because Dean's right.

"So far all you've told me about is a manipulative bitch who uh, screwed you, played mind games with you and did everything in the book to get you to go bad."

Yeah babey I'm tired, it's my day off, and I've braved myself up to tackle the tumultuous S4 because it's giving mixed feelings!!!!

You know the drill. Unhinged thoughts, commentary and screaming under the cut. I've been in full media analysis mode for the last week so it might get a little academic too, who knows.

A warning - I'm not enjoying the Heaven x Hell sub plot. I know, I'm sorry (not really.) I will persist as long as I can but you can't rip seasons 1-3 out of my cold dead hands because I'm clinging to them too strongly. They just hit the spot near perfectly. World's biggest fandom member disappointment, and proud, over here.

Anyway commentary bellow!

S4E9/10 - I Know What You Did Last Summer & Heaven and Hell

Ok so, this is a real topic, and I'm going to tread lightly here, but I appreciate the sinister undertones of Ruby coming onto Sam and him actively pushing back - he's vulnerable, abusing a substance, and she's actively taking advantage of that and doesn't stop after he makes it clear he's uncomfortable the first time. A boundary is broken and pushed through. Very icky. I have seen spoilers for Ruby's character (unfortunately!) and like, have to say, she got me. But I think I'd start to really clue in with this episode that something is deeply not ok - based on that one scene alone.

I am however, deeply worried, that the emotional manipulation is not going to be handled with the consideration it needs (especially with regards to a woman coming onto a man and being too pushy) and it'll be played off lightly. I guess we'll find out. But I'm getting defensive already. Appreciate that Dean clocks it immediately however.

On a lighter note - go psychic boy go

Anytime Dean makes this face I go mental. He looks like a concerned version of the Eyes emoji. Top 10 expressions I have too much fun trying to replicate in art. Buddy being dead for 6 months must've sucked you've missed so much Oh No.

Supremely embarrassed that it ONLY JUST CLICKED that they're doing a whole Sam's with the Demons, Dean's with the Angels thing.

I'll focus in on the most specific shit and then something so blunt will fly over my big idiot head. Amazing.

Ironic of course, and clearly intentional that its cause Sam was always appointed the 'better one' but that's only cause Dean purposefully inserted himself as the moral-fall character as a way to try and protect Sam. Obsessed with that concept, not so much with the heaven v hell stuff.

REGARDLESS, two angels rocking up and Ruby's immediate response being to turn on the demon eyes makes me wonder - is this intentional - did she choose to do this, was an otherworldly force compelling her to do it?

No I'm not just asking these cause I'm cooking up ideas for Sam to get more demonic nooooooo what're you talking about noooooooo

Hilarious that Cas and his mate rock up like "Hello we are literal fucking angels, we want this human woman please we're going to kill her now, please hand her over"

like they can't just yoink her regardless.

And this is starting to stray into "Why Shy really isn't enjoying the heaven-hell stuff in spn" - which I should save for an entirely separate post, but most of it boils down to the stakes don't feel serious anymore, the comparative power levels of character's feels unbalanced, it takes away ANY weight to Sam's personal faith as a character trait, and--

I'm sorry I just cannot get behind any of it. Really dislike it. Unfortunate. Oh well. Sozzles.

Heaven and Hell was a real hard episode for me to watch for a number of reasons and overall, I deeply disliked it, but the ending scene of Dean breaking down was extremely well done so huge props for that. Fantastic writing and acting all through. Much to consider!!

S4E11 - Family remains

The summary for this one looks. Fun.

"And what am I running from?"

"What you told me. Or are we pretending that never happened?"

OUGH. OUGH. AUGH. OOMF. ACK. AUGH.

I appreciate that unlike every ghost hunter I've watched on youtube, this show recognises that EMF readers cannot be completely trusted. 10/10 thank you supernatural. One small little line about the needle being wacky, and Dean noting that there's power lines right next to the house. Love it.

Nice.

I can sense I'm going to enjoy this episode.

I LOVE A GOOD GHOST-HUNTING EPISODE!!

Also love that this episode forcibly made the boys reconcile with the confliction of killing humans vs killing creatures, but the humans were in a way like the creatures (monsters), the same way the monsters can be like humans.

Anyway, tonal whiplash, yet again with this show:

S4E12 - Chris Angel Is a Douche Bag

The Winchesters need worksafe inspector fake ID because It'd be perfect for this episode specifically

I LOVE the three older magician characters. These guys are great.

WHAT

Anyway this is a good bit. This is a really good bit.

Yeah Sammy what kind of kool aid are you drinking?????

That was.... A weird one but a fun one.

Anyway I'm really starting to feel like I want to cherry pick eps but I'm going to hold off. Till I hit S5 at least.

Like I rabidly consumed seasons 1-3 like a starving animal and now I'm reluctant to watch episodes cause I know there's good shit in here, and each episode has some important development moments for characters, or relevant plot that I want to know about so I don't feel like I can start picking and choosing episodes based on descriptions yet. But damn. Lot more misses than hits for me this season. Seriously considering buying a dvds of just S1-3 cause GODDAMN. Loved almost everything about the first three.