#it would be poetic if they felt they were the only people who would miss them if they died

[mystic-writings]

ink on skin | daryl dixon

PAIRING — daryl dixon x fem!soulmate!reader

REQUEST — anon — hello! could you do an angsty story with daryl dixon? fem reader please <3 

SUMMARY — daryl gave up on the concept of soulmates long ago, even with the words marked on his wrist. and then he found you.

WARNINGS — canon-typical scenarios, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, soulmate au

WORD COUNT — 3,573

NOTES — this was supposed to be part of a really long collection of prompt drabbles from years ago but i found it in my docs and turned it into something a lot longer <3 it’s not the best (i couldn't for the life of me work out a good ending), but i think this might be one of my faves i’ve written bc of how poetic the first few paragraphs are 

masterlist | navigation | requests are open!

Daryl gave up on the concept of soulmates long before the world ended. He gave up on it when he was just a boy, when his mother died and his father stopped showing love. When he was told by his peers, his brother, his father, that no one would ever want him to stay with them, because he just wouldn’t be wanted by anyone. 

He grew to loathe the words on his wrist from a very young age. He did everything he could to cover them — makeup he stole from his aunt, long-sleeved shirts, bracelets, you name it. He’d even gotten used to not glancing at the ink scribed on his left wrist, making sure that no matter what, his eyes never fell on them. 

But even when he hated the words that sat there, waiting to be spoken by someone who cared, someone who wanted him, he couldn’t deny the countless nights he spent awake, tracing each letter and imagining what his soulmate’s voice sounded like. How would they say those three little words? What would they look like? When would he meet them? 

Daryl missed the feeling of being wanted. He only ever felt it when he was with his mother, when he was a young boy who didn’t know anything but that the sky was blue and soulmates were real and his father was mean. He hasn’t felt wanted — truly wanted — for a long, long time, not even when he found the group. 

Over time, with the loathing came the forgetting of the words marked on his wrist. By the time the world ended, Daryl had almost completely abandoned the reality of having a soulmate, and he rarely ever thought about it. In fact, he felt some relief in the fact that the world had ended. The chances of him finding ‘the one’ had lowered significantly now that most of the population was undead, and he had no reason to worry about being better for someone just to make it seem like he was worth loving anymore. 

For almost three years, he lived with the relief of likely not having a soulmate anymore. 

Today was an ordinary day, especially for the Alexandrians. At least, it seemed like an ordinary day. The sun was shining, people were milling around, crops were growing. But underneath the surface was something that no one wanted to address. Fear. 

Negan was beginning his wrath on the community that could barely keep itself alive. He demanded supplies, and he demanded a lot of them. So, half of Daryl’s people had gone out on runs to look for stuff. Food, clothes, medicine, whatever they could bring back. Daryl was among that group, taking a car as opposed to his motorbike and going to a high school with Carol.

At first, he volunteered to go alone, but she reasoned with him. It was too big of an area for him to cover on his own, she said. He could get hurt, or worse. And it was Carol, how could he deny her? She was his best friend, after all. So, Daryl drove in silence, Carol in the passenger seat, staring curiously at him. 

The feeling of her eyes on his annoyed him to no end, and eventually, the archer caved. 

“There somethin’ on my face or wha’?”

“Nothing,” Carol chirped. “Just… thinking.” 

“‘Bout wha’?” Daryl asked, sparing a glance at the woman. 

Carol shrugged, eyeing her friend. “About those words, on your arm.” 

Daryl tensed, shifting his posture to hopefully hide them from Carol’s view. “And?”

“Well, they’re not gone, for one.” She stated, a lilt in her voice. “And they’re… interesting first words for a soulmate, don’t you think?”

“How am I supposed ta know? I ain’t never seen anyone else’s tattoos. And it ain’t like I got a good chance of meetin’ ‘em, with all this shit goin’ on.” Daryl grumbled, watching Carol shrug and avert her gaze, looking ahead at the road. 

“Just saying… I wouldn’t give up hope, Daryl.” 

How would Carol know whether or not he should give up hope? Sure, she’d been the person closest to him aside from Rick, but even she knew nothing about his soulmate. Hell, he was still trying to figure out how she knew exactly what words marked his wrist. Still, he shook the thoughts from his head and continued the drive in silence, as though nothing had been spoken between the pair. 

Somehow, the high school Daryl and Carol had arrived at seemed to be completely abandoned. 

There were no walkers roaming around outside the grounds, most of the windows were intact, and the parking lot was practically void of cars. It was a small town, but from what Daryl could remember of the high schools they’d driven past or looted during their time at the prison, he figured most high schools in small towns — like this one, in particular — would’ve been turned into aid camps for refugees. 

Even with no signs of life, Carol and Daryl kept their weapons up as they entered through the main doors. 

Flashlight beams swept over every inch of the school, and it became clear as to why there were no walkers. Rotting bodies littered the linoleum floors, dried blood splattered over tile and wall and metal lockers. A stench that the pair had, unfortunately, gotten used to, permeated the air, filling their guts with a permanent feeling of nausea. 

The first place they’d found was the nurse’s office, and while there wasn’t much in the way of medicines, there were supplies that Alexandria was lacking. Gauze, tension wraps, bandaids, generic over the counter medicines like ibuprofen and Gravol. Whatever was left, Carol loaded into the backpack she’d brought, filling it to the brim with what they found. 

“Cafeteria should be this way,” she nodded down the hall, flashlight sweeping across the path before they exited. 

Passing by empty classroom after empty classroom, Daryl said, “Migh’ need some of this stuff for later, when the kids get older, ya know? Be good for ‘em to learn.” 

“Yeah, it would be,” Carol nodded, eyes landing on a set of double doors to her right. “Maybe we’ll come back for all that stuff later.” 

Daryl grunted in affirmation, about to push the cafeteria door open with his shoulder. He paused as a loud thump echoed down the hall. His eyes flashed, followed by the beam of his flashlight, landing on a singular closed door, a plastic chair propped under the handle. 

“Leave it,” Carol advised. “It’s just a walker.” 

Daryl nodded, but his eyes lingered on the door for a moment. Deciding to leave it be, he pushed the cafeteria door open, finding it empty yet again. The pair crossed the large area to the hot table, where they could already see some canned goods lying about on the tables. 

“If there were people here,” Carol began, “why wouldn’t they have taken the food with them when they left?”

“Why’s that matter?” Daryl asked, propping his crossbow against the wall and pulling out his knife. He knelt by the door to the kitchen, putting his flashlight down and wedging the blade between the frame. “‘S more for us, ‘s all that matters. Don’ gotta question everythin’,” 

Carol said nothing, keeping her flashlight trained on the door for Daryl to use as extra light. 

After prying open the door, the pair used a cart to transport the mounds of large, sealed canned goods. With Carol pulling and Daryl pushing, they’d made quick work of the first two trips they needed to make, loading their trunk as best as they were able. 

On their way out of the third and final trip, Carol held the cafeteria door open as Daryl pushed the half-full cart, stopping abruptly as the door started to swing shut behind him. 

“What? What is it?”

“I hear somethin’,” Daryl muttered, straining his ears to listen for the noise again. He listened for what felt like decades, and just when he thought he was going crazy, he heard it again. “There,”

“What? I didn’t hear anything,” Carol said. 

“Nah, I heard it. Comin’ from this way,” he gestured down the part of the hall they hadn’t bothered exploring. Slowly, focused entirely on identifying the noise, Daryl crept down the hall, a confused Carol following him. 

Just as he’d been passing the room with the chair blocking the door, Daryl heard two sounds: a dull thunk, and a hiccuping cry. He stopped, turning to the door that had drawn his attention before. 

“Daryl, it’s just a walker,” Carol insisted. “Let’s go, we got what we need.” 

The archer didn’t listen, footfalls nearly silent against the linoleum as he approached the door, knife raised. In quick motions, Daryl pulled the chair from the door, sending it down the hall with a resounding screech, grabbing at the handle and pulling it open. The hinges squeaked as he peered within the dark, small room — a supply closet, he’d discerned from the cleaning products lining the shelves. All sense of danger left him when he wasn’t met with a walker, but instead a girl, her body half-laying, half-sitting, propped against the wall. 

Daryl’s eyes widened, taking in her form. She was covered head to toe in dirt and grime, save for the clear tear tracks down her cheeks and neck. Her hair was matted, and the side of her calf, just above the ankle, was wrapped in dirtied bandages. Her only protection was a small knife, covered in dried blood, the handle of which rested in her limp hand. 

“Holy shit,” Daryl blurted, catching the attention of Carol, but barely gaining acknowledgement from the girl before him. 

Carol, peeking over Daryl’s shoulder, moved first. She darted around the archer’s broad frame, kneeling down at the girl’s calf. Peeling the bandage from her skin, Carol sighed in relief, finding a deep gash where she feared there might have been a bite mark. “She’s hurt,” Carol remarked, moving closer to search for a pulse. “And barely alive.” 

“Go bring the cart out, I’ll carry her out,” Daryl’s eyes never left the girl’s form as Carol left. Carefully, he scooped the girl into his arms, relief flooding him when a weak, protesting groan fell from her chapped lips.

There was no telling how long she’d been stuck in that closet, without food or water, simply left to die. And based on the chair propped against the door… it had been intentional. 

Daryl carried her to the car with ease, having Carol assist him as he laid you across the back seat, taking the time to make sure she would be secure as they drove. After confirming that everything was packed into the trunk, Daryl peeled out of the school parking lot, the drive back to Alexandria being much shorter than the one to the school. 

The sun was setting when the car passed the gates, and from there, things passed in a flurry of motion. Daryl carried the girl to the infirmary himself, watching Tara and Denise move about hastily to heal this mystery woman. 

“What happened to her?” Denise asked, cutting the bandage from her ankle. 

“Dunno,” Daryl huffed. “Found her like tha’. Musta been trapped for a while. Few days without water, at least.”

Denise only nodded, working to clean the wound and stitch it. She barely had the focus to think about the wound itself, how deep it was and the likelihood of infection setting in. Tara worked at cleaning the girl’s skin, inserting an IV into her hand like she’d been taught. 

The sun had set by the time they were done, the girl changed into new clothes and her skin cleaned of grime. Tara had been sitting by her side when Daryl came back to the infirmary, after going to the Grimes home to eat something and give as much information as he could to Rick and Michonne. 

“How’s she doin’?”

“As good as she can,” Tara smiled awkwardly. “I don’t think she’ll be waking up anytime soon, she’s like— super dehydrated. It’s been an hour and I’ve had to change the bag thingy twice already.”

Daryl grunted in acknowledgement, pulling up a chair on the other side of the girl’s bedside. He didn’t know much about her — or anything, really, not even her name — but even with her chapped lips and sickly look, he thought she was beautiful. And he also knew that whoever had left her in that closet had done so on purpose. He figured it might have been because of her injury, but it was cruel no matter which way he tried to paint it. 

He just hoped she’d be okay when she woke up. 

It took the mystery girl three days to wake up. Managing her health at a time where there weren’t any real supplies to use had been difficult, and it took all of Denise’s focus to make sure she had enough fluids. 

Waking up in an unfamiliar, oddly clean, room, on a bed, with no stench of rotting bodies wafting through the air was confusing, terrifying, and oddly comforting. 

Your body woke with a jolt, eyes snapping open like you’d woken from a nightmare of sorts. There was movement to your right, and you jumped back from it, frantic eyes finding a blonde girl attempting to calm you without touching you as best as she was able. 

“Hey, hey, you’re okay, you’re safe.” She’d said, stressing the last word. “One of our guys found you in a supply closet and brought you here. He— He said you were half dead.” 

Pure fear and confusion kept your mouth shut. The girl kept talking, asking questions, but you couldn’t bring yourself to respond to any of it. The pain in your leg hadn’t been of any help, pulsing and throbbing with every slight movement. 

By the time she’d realized you weren’t going to respond, she sighed and moved over to the kitchen to your right. When she came back, she placed some food and a tall glass of water on the bedside table, backing away slowly as she spoke. “I’m Denise. The man who found you, Daryl, is on his way to see you. Maybe you’ll feel more comfortable talking to him?”

The idea of speaking to anyone, even the man you vaguely remember before passing out due to dehydration, made your stomach roll. Still, you picked up the plate, gratefully digging into the food you were given. Drinking the water, you relished the feeling of it sliding down your throat. Water was something you hadn’t had in what felt like years, and you’d be damned if you didn’t cherish what you’d been given. 

As you finished up, the door creaked open, and your body stiffened. You watched a burly, reserved man step inside, his movements hesitant. You watched Denise approach, whispering something to him — likely about you. Presuming this was Daryl, you willed yourself to relax, even as you pulled your knees tight to your chest, arms locked around them. 

You watched him approach the bedside, standing awkwardly beside you as you looked into his eyes. Strikingly blue, surprisingly soft. 

“Hey. Ya alright?” He asked. His voice was rough, southern accent awfully thick. But his words sounded soft, somehow. Small. Like he was trying not to frighten you. 

All you could manage was a nod. He huffed, nodding back, clearly somewhat relieved that you were at least communicating somehow. You kept your eyes on him, tracing every inch of his face and his clothes. It was clear to you, though you were unsure of how, that he must’ve been built for this world. Daryl seemed out of place in this clean, crisp, white room, and when you pictured him in the woods, he seemed to blend right in. 

After a moment, he turned and went back to talk to Denise. They spoke in hushed whispers, and you thought back to the exchange you’d just had. Your mind had been reeling, so caught up in the entire situation, that the words Daryl had spoken didn’t register. And neither did the tingling across the inside of your wrist. 

Pulling down the sleeve of your shirt, your fingers grazed at the skin where the words you’d been waiting your whole life for the right person to say used to be. With wide eyes, you found the words gone, replaced by a slight scar of where they had once been inscribed. It was surreal, and definitely not the time. 

“Hey,” Daryl called out as he came to stand beside you again, voice still soft despite its natural roughness. “Doc said ya can leave if ya want. I know ya don’t know me, but if ya want… ya can stay with me. I got a cot ya can sleep on, if yer okay with tha’,” 

You mustered up a small smile, nodding at the man before you — your soulmate. You’d been wishing to find him your entire life, but with the world ending, you put that aspiration aside. You certainly hadn’t expected to find him when you were at the brink of death, trapped by the selfish people you’d once considered family. 

Carefully, you slipped out from the blankets, stumbling as you put weight on your injured leg. Luckily, Daryl caught you, wrapping an arm around your waist as the other guided your arm to rest around his neck. Wordlessly, you watched his cheeks flush red as he shifted his weight before you began walking. 

It was painful, getting to the house he lived in. Not because of your leg, but because of the proximity. Along with the fact that you couldn’t bring yourself to speak a single word, not even to him. 

As you settled into the large basement room he’d taken, he told you more about the community, about his people. The ones who lived here — Rick, Michonne, Carl, and Judith — were family to him. The others were the same, but they all lived in different homes. He laid out the cot as you sat on the bed, watching intently as his voice reverberated around the room, rattling your heart in your chest. 

“I know ya don’t talk much,” he huffed, rooting through a bag of his and pulling something out. “But ya can write, right?”

You nodded, watching a smile play on his lips as he handed you a notepad and pen. 

“Can ya tell me yer name, at least? So we can call ya somethin’ that ain’t jus’ ‘girl’?”

Smiling, you wrote out your name and handed the paper back to him. Your smile widened when you heard him say your name, meeting his eyes as he looked back up at you. 

“Ya can talk, right?” You nodded. 

Daryl nodded, leaving the pen and paper with you, just in case. “‘M gonna go find Rick, tell him yer stayin’ with me fer now. Alright?”

The thought of Daryl leaving you, of being alone, in an unfamiliar place, with no light aside from the window at the very top of the wall, shocked the fear back into you. As he turned, heading for the door that led to the stairs, your breath caught in your throat. As quickly as you were able, you reached out, grabbing the man’s wrist and pulling him back to face you. 

“Please, don’t leave.” You whispered, voice gravelly and strained. It surprised even you, eyes widening as you met Daryl’s gaze. But his carried a certain fear as his eyes tore from your own, locking onto the wrist you’d caught. 

Following his line of sight, your heart stuttered, watching the ink on his arm begin to fade into his skin, into the same imprinted scar of words that you had. 

“Yer…” he breathed, eyes filling with tears.

“Yeah,” you whispered, eyes watering, watching him as his eyes remained on his wrist. “Your soulmate.” 

Daryl pulled his wrist from your delicate hold, his mind on overdrive. He’d thought it ironic, that the apocalypse had only pushed him closer to his soulmate instead of further apart. And now, the words he’d been desperate to cover throughout his life were finally gone, and the woman that the universe decided was meant for him was sitting on his bed, saved from the cusp of death because of him. All because he couldn’t take his mind off the closet with the chair blocking the door. 

His hand came to his wrist, rubbing at the skin that was no longer tainted with words he thought would never be spoken. And despite all of the fear Daryl carried with him over the years, the gratefulness he had for the apocalypse and the relief that he’d never have to let down his soulmate when they saw that he wasn’t good enough for them, he felt none of it when he looked at you. 

All he could feel was happy. Relief, not that the world had ended, but that you were safe and healthy. 

And, all of a sudden, meeting your eyes, Daryl was okay with the idea of having a soulmate. All the words that had been spat his way growing up, all the times he was desperate to pretend like he didn’t have a soulmate didn’t matter anymore. All that mattered was you. 

It would take time for Daryl to feel like he deserved you, he knew that. But you were here, and you were alive. That was enough for now.

Forever taglist: @mazerunnerrose @theboldandthebootyful @miraclesoflove @heliads

Daryl Dixon taglist: @katrina765 @hp-hogwartsexpress @ellablossom @alexxavicry @avabh12 (open!)

taglist form here!

[nyx-is-missing]

Hi! Can I request a Clarissa × Fem!reader, where reader is spending a lot of time talking to someone from Athena's cabin and she gets jealous. you can decide what cabin reader is in :)

Jealous jealous girl

Clarisse la rue x fem!reader (apollo's kid)

Summary: when the girl she likes is being friendly to someone, Clarisse might see red.

Warnings: no major fights actually, fluff (a bit) kissing (yes today no clickbait) medíocre writting and im sorry.

(I didn't review it, don't sue me, English isn't my native language, that's probably why it's mediocre, love ya

"Have you actually read that book? Oh my gods really? I felt like i was the only one who knew it"

Clarisse watched with red eyes as (Y/n) got excited and laughed togheter with some kid from Athena's cabin.

They werent exactly...togheter yet, but they WERE something, everyone was sure of that.

Clarisse mind couldnt comprehend then, how even though EVERYONE knew they had something, that particular girl would not back off of her.

(Y/n) laughed togheter with the girl at some book reference she had made, and the final straw for Clarisse was when the girl had the courage to touch her girl's knee.

Her sunshine?

The disrespect, was she not seeing Clarrise looking at them? Like 10 steps behind?

The.disrespect.

Oh that will end right now.

Walking over to the girls with a fake smile who people would perceive of normal happiness, however, if you did knew her, her eyes had a hint of red rage in them.

"Love? Would you come with me for a second yes?"

She took (Y/n) by the hands but before she could even get up the Athena kid made herself seen.

"Excuse me? Cant you see we're talking? So rude."

"Oh yes, excuse you really, i dont think a need a cue to talk to my girlfriend, now shut up before I make you eat that book for dinner."

Not waiting for any more words Clarisse took reader by the hand again.

"Clarisse that was not nice, she was my friend- dont even start to speak right now, we'll talk in my cabin, it must be empity right now, we dont need the camp seeing something they dont need"

Letting (Y/n) guide her, still holding her hand, Clarisse had a confused look on her face.

"But we are not going to fight, not today"

"Says who?"

They got inside the cabin and bingo, empity empity, all the Apollo kids must be doing its activities, or getting ready for dinner, as always.

"Me, Love. We wont fight, we'll talk."

Clarisse sat down at the bed she knew it was (y/n)'s waiting for her to do the same.

Choosing to stand, she had a blank look on her face.

"You said we would talk, talk to me, why be mean to my friend clari?"

"Because im jealous. Im not made of steel, love, i cant see a girl from a rival cabin flirting with my sunshine and go around skipping like a kid, you know me"

"We were not flirting clari, she is my friend!"

"YOU were not flirting, she wants to be more than that"

Clarisse corrected

"And you have a right to do something about it since when? Everytime you talk about me to your friends im a friend too, but suddently when its convenient i turn into your girlfriend? Oh please"

Clarisse looked at her, and extended her hands to grab (y/n) hands, when they finally touched Clarisse got (y/n) to get closer and closer to her, now she was standing in between Clarisse's legs and had to look down to see her.

"I never said i was right love, im sorry for hurting you, i swear.....i was insecure about that, im so sorry really..."

"Clari you dont needed to-"

"Date me"

Clarisse interrupted her mid speech.

"What?"

"Date me, let me introduce you to everyone as my girlfriend, i wont make you hurt anymore, date me....-"

Please

That was the word missing, would it make clarisse apear as desperate if she used it?

Fuck it, she was inside the Apollo cabin, that gave her enough poetic justice to be as luvestruck as she could

She found herself resting her hands on (y/n) hips, looking up to her with heart eyes.

"Please... date me"

.

.

.

"Say something, please"

Whoever first said that acts spoke words was very much right, because the kiss Clarisse received was nothing short of a love letter.

Clarisse felt hands on her cheek and neck, caressing her.

The kiss was slow and carefull at first, like the first time they kissed, so very sweet, until it wasn't.

When the kiss deepened, Clarisse's hands sunk more onto (y/n) hips, and then started to pull her down, to sit on her lap.

It was the very first time both felt like this, the absolute need to just become a fusion, hug so tightly a loved one that they would just morph into one.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you"

Clarisse said, breathing in her girlfriend's neck when they separated to breath.

When (y/n) was going to speak, she felt a small bite on her lower neck.

"Clarisse- ah"

"Sorry.."

Clarissed giggled before she went back kissing her mouth, when did she became one of the girls that giggled?

They heard the cabin door opening and then a

"Oh fuck sorry i just...ill come back later, and you (y/n) will tell me everything about later or ill change my name, bye lovebirds"

They looked at each other resisting the urge to laugh.

"Well i guess we wont need to introduce ourselfs to anybody, by tomorrow morning they'll know"

[mitsvriii]

"Nothing's New"

In which your partner is never going to pay attention to you, because they’re too focused on their dead lover

Bell’s notes: “writer bell goes too far with this fic-” im /j no ones gonna say that, angst powers pls work tho, like im asdlkfjawel;fjsd;jf;lska, i cant write dude, let me like, plan this out in my head before writing nonsense, LIKE BRO, feral over angst LORD, 100k likes and you get part 2 /jjjj, growling i love angst, MWHAHAHA, sorry ely, yuka, mhie, snob, and zee if you read this 😔😔😔, i listened to “IT Girl” while writing this 😋, got carried away with Ayato’s part oopsies, i believe Guizhong for the ladies but whatever 😔😔😔, cut out Wanderer & Childe in the end because i’m TIRED, not proofread

Story details: Ayato lowkey a bitch, scratch that highkey, reader has self-doubt, Neuvilette doesn’t mean to be mean he just ISSS, GUIZHONG DID NOTHING STOP MAKING HER THE ONE IN BLAME IN THESE ZHONGLI SCENARIOS, oh and I couldn’t be bothered with Xiao’s part like a quarter through he’s such a flexible yet straight character, it’s the way you can tell when I got lazy with each part, chance Xiao & Zhongli are gonna be ooc as i’ve never written anything but short headcanons for them before

Characters & Triggers: Ayato, Neuvilette, Xiao, & Zhongli;  reader has self-doubt, mention of death, mention of martial neglect

Reader details: female reader in Ayato’s part is explicit. female reader in Neuvilette’s part can be interpreted with the way you read it. the other parts, however, shouldn’t have a specified reader type. reader’s personality, race/ethnicity, height, physical descriptions, or anything of the sort is not mentioned. if anything is let me know and i’ll edit it. 

Ayato: No surprise the Yashiro Commissioner doesn’t pay attention to his new wife, the one that he didn’t marry first. You knew that he didn’t love you, and most likely never would because you were, in fact, the second pick. Actually, it was probably in the hundreds based on the amount of marriage arrangement offers Ayato had gotten considering he was one of the biggest figures in Inazuma. It didn’t matter, but he most likely picked you because your clan was a small one to put it lightly, so he most likely chose it, and you, because it wouldn’t be a hassle with the press. But of course, he would choose the person and clan that seemed, “easy”. It hurt seeing some of the people’s sympathetic stares, such as Ayaka’s, Thoma’s, and a few of the older women working in the estate. You got used to the lack of greeting from Ayato when he got off work, the lack of warmth beside you at night. You found it hilarious, although you were hysteric at the time as you had just found out that Ayato was off that day and neglected to see you, that he never, ever laid down in the same bed as you. It doesn’t matter no matter how hard you work around the estate, how long you sit up doing his work, which you soon quit once he yelled at you like a homeless dog, or even the distinct flower you made out of one of Ayato’s favorite sweets that he ignored. Not even a glance at your general direction, either. After a while, you decided to do some digging on his past wife, only to find out that she was in fact near perfect. Perfect reputation, perfect everything, to put it shortly. Shortly after asking Ayaka what happened to her, by pulling the sad, guilty wife card, you found out she was a victim of an assassination attempt that turned into a success. Of course, Ayato and his perfect wife would only be torn apart by death. It was poetic, and it made you sick. So what were you to do but endure the slow torture that you and Ayato’s marriage was? After all, nothing you could do could change how he felt about you. 

Neuvillette: The famous hydro dragon, at least to those who knew his ‘secret’. His past lover, unfortunately, died before him, no doubt to his immortality. Of course, you would soon die, maybe in a few decades but, hey, it wasn’t like he would miss you. You could only wait awake at night as Neuvillette went to fix himself his own meal, despite you staying up to cook him one and await for his return from work. It’s not that was the only time he never paid attention to you, after all the man had most likely been grieving his wife for centuries at this point in time. So what were you to do besides stay and watch this man be emotionally constipated around you? Why did he even marry you in the first place, then? It couldn’t be because his past wife resembled you, and it certainly wasn’t because you both acted the same. Was it because he needed someone to cling to? I mean, you weren’t exactly someone who seemed to not fit the criteria of a compassionate co-worker who would comfort Neuvillette in his times of distress. Did Neuvilette only come to you because you were his way of grieving? It would make partial sense, to cling to the nearest piece of comfort to help with the pain of loss. It made you feel like nothing but an object meant for his emotional wants, but in reality, that’s all you ever are and will ever be to him. 

Xiao: The famous adeptus long ago, had someone close to him. Shame they fell to waste during the archon wars, along with the other adepti. It was no surprise that everyone familiar with Liyue stories knew about the two of them together, which unfortunately included you. It didn’t pain you that much until your oh-so-loveable boyfriend got distracted by two kids playing with a Xiao lantern and one of her. After that, it only devolved into more. The lack of visits to your room in the inn, the lack of responses whenever you left your little notes for him near your meet-up place, and the extreme lack of thank-you-notes whenever you left Xiao almond tofu. It didn’t matter that you started to skip and completely ignore doing all of these things just to see if he would notice because the adeptus failed to appear in your room just to check in to see if you were okay. This behavior was unlike him, at least in the sense of him completely ignoring you. The only answer you could think of, that logically made sense, of course, was that he was reminded of his past loved one because of the run-in with the lanterns you two had while out in Liyue. So in terms, he seemed to disconnect with you because of the memories of his past significant other? You knew the adepti didn’t die peacefully, you could tell that much from the stories, so it wouldn’t be surprising if that also applied to Xiao’s past lover. There was nothing you could do about it though, because if you knew Xiao, he wouldn’t talk about her to you nor push her aside for you.

Zhongli: Guizhong. Of course, you were familiar with the name, everyone in Liyue was. Everyone might be a stretch considering the visitors and children, but the point’s been made. Morax and Guizhong were close. Close in a sense of possibly having relationship affairs but that was only explicit to you because of the way your lover would glace at glaze lilies. You couldn’t call him your lover, could you? Not with the way he would hum to the glaze lilies, the way his eyes would also drift away from you whenever you talked as you took strolls through Guilu Plains, and the way he would opt to tell stories of specific tales of his time as Morax, ones that included Guizhong in some way. It got to the point where you had to make up tasks that you had to do daily just to get away from the walks you two took, not to hear the different-yet-similar stories of Morax and totally not Guizhong. It was childish of you to be doing so, you had yourself convinced, as you couldn’t blame Guizhong for any of it. She had no part of this besides well, besides being your number one stressor for the past few weeks. It was tiring yet somehow for the sake of not wanting a glare or side-eye from Zhongli about his stories, which you never thought you’d get that tired of hearing, you kept your mouth shut, despite how hard it was. You knew it would only take so much more, though, before you said something about it. 

[evelynpr]

Genshin Official Relationships and Status

Something to take note off in character relationships is what their "official and known" relationships are. So, I decided to try to make a chart of one with the playable cast and some extras.

This is a draft though. If you have criticisms and comments, absolutely please do leave them because I don't think my interpretations of these government systems are that accurate.

Anyways, here they are! The higher the placement, the higher the authority. Distance does not apply, and the legend is in each of the pictures.

Mondstadt: That's a lotta knights

They can be split between the Church and Knights, but the Church is still under the Grand Master as far as I know.

Power is surprisingly concentrated to 1/2 individuals only for a nation of freedom...Mond you gotta work on that...

Jean, Diluc, Kaeya, and Lisa are arranged the way they are in reference to the Klee summer event where they passed on who was looking after Mond.

Diluc still retains his high position because he has so many high credentials and connections (The Darknight Hero, Mond's richest man, high status in an intelligence network), despite being the Ex-Cavalry Captain.

Rosaria is an official recognized nun, but her vigilante works are by her own accord, hence the colors.

I am not sure whatsoever where Jean and Barbara's father, the Cardinal, should really be placed, or if he even still holds the position.

Poor Noelle does so much more Mond, but is lowest in status...please just make her a knight already T__T

Liyue: Zhongli and his powerful lesbians

I really am not sure if Ningguang is who Liyue's closest "leader", but that is how I felt during most of Liyues events

I'm assuming that the adepti now have a lesser status in Liyue because of the shift in power to the humans during the archon quest

How high Beidou's status is is, completely informal. She's right beside Ningguang because they do find each other to be equal competitors in their own way.

Those directly connected to Zhongli are those I assumed to have taken direct orders from him, hence why Beidou and Keqing are not included although they do respect him as their archon (Keqing in her own way)

I feel like I'm missing people here, compared to Mond, so uh, help me out here-

Inazuma: They just had a civil war...woops

I am reallyyy unsure how to label Sangonomiya island's status. Are they under the shogun? Are they their own separate territory?

Otherwise, Inazuma is pretty straightforward with its 3 factions and families

Sumeru: The whole government was just overthrown

Are there like, genuinely so sages right now, or replacement Grand Sage??? Nahida you need to do something asap-

Scara doesn't exactly have equal status to Alhaitham as Acting Grand Sage, but I felt it was more important to show that Scara is working directly under Nahida

Speaking of which, the title "shadow" is used because it's the same role that Ei served to Makoto, which I find poetic. If there is an official or better title tho, I'd love to hear it.

Hopefully, as time passes, there will be more representatives from the desert with high status. Poor Candace is carrying the desert's status on her back-

Should I have included the Corps of Thirty even if there are no playable characters...?

Fontaine: Fancy Schmancy Titles

I honestly reallyyyy wished that Neuv and Wrio were on equal standing, but in the eyes of Fontaine, that probably just isn't true.

Even so, absolute do not underestimate how important Wrio's role is in Fontaine's justice system, because without the Fortress functioning as it is, so much of Fontaine's justice would fall apart.

Despite Furina's death penalty and retirement, I still believe she deserves the title of archon with the highest status. No matter what happens, she is still Fontaine's idol and savior. (Besides, if she wanted/needed anything, Neuv would give it to her.)

How high Navia, Clorinde, and Chevy's statuses are in relation to each other in reality is...not explicit?

Really, Clorinde is just another employee under Fontaine's justice system, and isn't a head in anyway, while Chevy and Navia are actual leaders. But, Clorinde is the best Champion Duelist, so does that make them cancel out...?

Anyways that's all from me! It's pretty interesting to me just how much of the cast are part of their respective nation's government, which only makes sense given the kind of ruckus the traveler causes. Have a good day!

[samkerrworshipper]

safe and sound | leah williamson x reader

themes of suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, self harm, depression, anxiety, angst, 4000 words

sorry this is messy asf and not spell checked whatsoever cause i’m uploading this at 1am lol but got this from a request and felt like i had to finish it before i start the lucy smut that i’m starting so here it is my loves xoxo

I blamed myself for getting myself into this position. Maybe if I’d been a better friend or a better player or maybe just if I hadn;t of woken up on the left side of the bed this morning. Maybe it would all be different if we hadn’t just won a home Euros, maybe I wouldn’t feel the same pressure from the media, maybe I wouldn’t have felt so goddamn anxious to go anywhere. Maybe if I hadn't transferred from Barca I’d feel safer, maybe if I wasn’t so focused on my career I would have seen the warning signs. I hadn’t though, hadn’t seen the way that I felt so fucking tired after every session, even the easier ones. Hadn’t noticed the fact that I wasn’t sleeping anymore and that I was always checking social media to see what people were saying about my most recent game. I hadn’t noticed that I was picking at my nail beds again until they were a bloody mess. Hadn’t noticed that the accidental nicks along my legs from my razor had slowly become less accidental. Hadn’t noticed how absolutely broken I had been from the inside out until I was sitting on top of my apartment car garage contemplating everything.

The sun was setting slowly, the yellows and pinks and oranges all mixing like a starburst tie dye across the sky. It was incredible, something I’d never really seen in London, it felt symbolic. Maybe if I hadn't been choking down my feelings for so long I wouldn’t have been looking at the concrete 30ms below me and finding comfort in it. Finding comfort in the poetic way that it spoke to me, that it made me feel a little bit more at peace. Solid, grey, concrete. Nothing special about it but there was also something so special about it. A gust of wind would probably be enough to send me plummeting onto it, my brains and blood spilling out all over it. It would never look the same after that, never be quite so mundane and normal. The bloodstain would be hard to get out, the deep maroon seeping into the stone and staining it within a matter of minutes. I thought about the headlines for a few seconds, I’d probably make the front page of about every newspaper in the nation, ‘Y/n Y/l/n, Lionesses star striker, dead at 24 due to suicide’, it sent shivers down my spine, the good kind of shivers that made you feel at peace.

I’d never really let myself get further than that, never left myself alone long enough to think of a plan, actually think about much further than sitting here. Now though I felt more alone than ever, I shouldn’t have ever left Barca, shouldn’t have left my family there. It had seemed like the right decision coming to England, to play for Arsenal, to play at home again. Now though I couldn’t have regretted my decision more, I mean I was pretty much calling Lucy or Alexia everyday telling them how desperate I was to come home, balling my eyes out to them on the phone about how much I missed our team in Spain. I was technically only on loan for a season, just to find my footing, but now I was certain that I stood no chance of surviving the whole season. The girls are lovely, Jonas was lovely, I was playing alongside the woman I loved but everything about it felt so wrong. Maybe it was the weather, or maybe it was the location but it all was just so wrong and I couldn’t tell you why. I woke up every morning, went to training, came home, ate, tried to sleep and then repeated it all. It was a strenuously depressing pattern that never ended. It was the same, day in, day out. I didn’t have my found family anymore, just myself and my girlfriend who was too occupied with being Arsenal and England’s captain to have much time for me anymore. I didn’t really blame her, she was a busy woman, and she had such a good pure heart that she used to do so much good.

Sometimes it was overwhelming to me how much she was willing to give, to other people, to anything. She put her whole heart into everything and it was something I envied so much in her. Her willingness to give up anything for the people she cared about was insane to me. She cared so deeply about everyone around her and it was truly astounding but it did leave me feeling neglected occasionally when she was busy helping out someone or busy dedicating her time to a project that needed her more than I did. I didn’t like to be needy, so maybe even though I’d been struggling for a few weeks I hadn’t flagged it with Leah.

She’d caught on somewhere along the way, stopping me one morning to check in, I’d shaken her off with a smile telling her I was just a little bit burn out with the Euro’s and changing to Arsenal, I could tell she hadn’t believed me but she also knew that I didn’t respond well to being pushed, normally she would wait me out, wait until I came crawling to her to talk but this time it felt different, like maybe this was the end. Maybe this time I wasn’t going to get around to talking to Leah, maybe this time I didn’t want her to help me, maybe I just wanted to be done with trying to be better, trying to be okay when I wasn’t. Maybe this ledge was the end of my story, maybe it was destined to be.

“Hey honey.”

The sudden voice behind me was almost enough to send me over the ledge, my knuckles turning white from clutching onto the edge. I flinched as the source of the voice climbed up onto the ledge and sat down beside me.

“Beautiful sunset, how was your day?”

It was such a mundane question and the simplicity of the statement was enough to bring me down to earth enough to realise that there were tears falling down my face and my whole body was shaking slightly.

“Reminds me of the ones in Barca. It was alright.”

Leah nodded at me, keeping her own eyes on the horizon, the sun had almost fully gone down but there were parts of it still peeking out.

“I went and saw Keira and Jill, Keira was in town to visit Millie and some of the other girls, she said she missed you, that you’d been missing her and Luce’s calls for about a week now.”

My hands were almost numb from the death grip that I had on the ledge that we were sitting on. She had distanced herself enough that we weren’t touching but close enough that I could feel her presence.

“It kept slipping my mind to call them back.”

It was all excuses, things that I was telling Leah to avoid the conversation.

“Fair enough, they’re both just worried about you, I’m worried about you sweetheart. Did you end up going for coffee with Katie this morning?”

I knew she was asking me the questions as a distraction technique, new she’d been taught it from Lucy when I’d moved here, the same stuff Lucy had been taught from my therapist. I knew that subconsciously but for some reason it worked every single time, without fail.

“Felt sick.”

“She called me, said you’d bailed last minute and asked me to check in with you for her, to tell you that you guys would have to reschedule. What did you eat for lunch?”

I could feel my legs kicking out against the solid concrete below my feet, I was averting Leah’s eye contact with everything that I could, keeping my eyes on my feet or the sky that was gradually getting darker.

“Felt sick, wasn’t hungry. Why are you here? I thought you had that dinner thing with Alex.”

It was the first question that I’d asked in the conversation, my curiosity taking over slightly.

“I came to check in with you, you weren’t answering my texts or calls and I was worried you were sick, so I came to check in before heading off to Alex’s, it’s unlike you to not be on your phone.”

I nodded, it was a fairly good explanation and it made sense but it also annoyed me so much because Leah showing up here was fucking with everything.

“You can go to Alex’s, I feel fine.”

“I love you, you know that right?”

Leah’s words hung heavy in the space between us.

“I know Lee.”

I rubbed at the tears that were drying up on my face with the sleeve of my hoodie, I was still trembling slightly but my tears had come to a slow.

“If anything ever happened to you I’d be beside myself.”

I felt my two front teeth falling to my lip, clutching it between my teeth and biting down on it.

“Lee, I’m fine.”

“No you’re not angel, and there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s okay for you to not be doing okay. We wouldn’t be sitting here if everything was fine, how about we get down from here, yeah? We can head down to your apartment, or my house if you want. We’ll go see the dogs, we can talk if you want, or we can call your therapist, or Ale, or we can just cuddle in bed, whatever you need.”

I shook my head almost immediately.

“Leah I need you to leave me alone, please, just leave, go home, go hang out with Alex, just leave me.”

“I can’t do that sweetheart and you know it, and if you can’t get down from here then you know that I won’t hesitate to call 999 if it's what I have to do to keep you safe. I love you Y/n, but I will not love you to death. So you can either get down from here by yourself or with my help, or with the help of a policeman, those are your options.”

It was the stern Leah that was now coming out now, the Leah that came out when she needed to help a teammate who was struggling but wouldn’t admit it, the Leah who was relentless and would do anything to protect the people she loved.

“I can’t do this anymore, I can’t fucking deal with this anymore.”

That was when I broke, tears and sobs cascading from my eyes and mouth.

“I know sweetheart, and I am so sorry that I didn’t realise that it had gotten this bad, I am so sorry for that. Let me make it up to you, let me take you home and I can take time off, we can both take time off, travel, whatever you need. Y/n/n, I can’t not do life without you, so let’s get down from here, let’s work this out at home.”

I was at a crossroads, on one hand I was very much so aware of the fact that I could jump right now, that Leah couldn’t stop that, I also knew that I wouldn’t do it with Leah here, the guilt of making her watch it would eat at me too much. So eventually, I was going to have to get down but for right now I couldn't, I needed to hold on to this for a little bit before having to get down and face reality.

“I’m not going to jump, I just need a few more minutes here.”

“I don’t know if I trust you right now honey, no offence, but I’m looking out for you.”

I nodded, it was fair judgement, I probably wouldn’t trust me either in her position.

“You can hold onto me if it helps, I just need some time here.”

Leah conceded to me, but wrapped her arm securely around my waist, moving herself so she was flush against me and holding me tightly against her body.

“How was Keira?”

“She was good, misses you, her and Lucy are good, I think Keira is getting the sense that Lucy might be tiptoeing around proposing. Apparently she’s been very secretive and antsy, typical Lucy fashion, I told her I knew nothing. Jill made me promise that we’d meet up with her, she says she misses my better half. I picked up Scout from the groomers, you should see the hair cut they gave her, just pure fluff. I went to the grocers, the fancy one that you love so much down the road, picked up all of your favourite stuff, even the stupidly expensive soup that you like. If you want we can go back to mine and you can eat it while we talk.”

She was trying to coax me away, with the promise of soup, which sounded so stupid but she knew me so well that it made me laugh a little bit.

“Can I have the soup without talking?”

“You can drink the soup first but we have to talk and you know it, whether you realise it or not it’s for the better.”

I nodded into Leah’s side, she was right, she was always right. She was so wise for her age and sometimes it felt like instead of being two years older than me she was 20.

“Let’s head home, yeah?”

I pursed my lips, still contemplating my options.

“You’re going to make me anyways, right?”

“Yeah babygirl, it’s for the best.”

I nodded at Leah, accepting defeat.

“Can you help me?”

Leah nodded at me almost immediately, getting herself down and then reaching up for me. She lifted me off of the ledge and pulled me down onto the ground beside her. The first thing she did was drape her jacket around my shivering form. She didn’t say anything else, she just immediately started walking, dragging me along towards her car and gracefully fastening the passenger seat belt around me before climbing into the driver's seat and started to drive.

The car ride was silent, I was a shivering, crying, mess. Leah was keeping up her strong facade, clearly not prepared to give me any sympathy. It wasn’t her way, she was a tough love kind of person. She gave it to you how it was and that was that. I loved her for that, I didn’t like people who bull shitted you with false sympathies and sweetness, I was a realist and so was Leah.

The drive to her house was reasonably short, she lived about a ten minute drive from my apartment or a half an hour walk. It was convenient, especially when one of us needed a little bit of space but we also wanted to be within reach of the other. When we did make it back to her house I was kind of feeling inexplicably numb, my thoughts eating at my brain and body and leaving me feeling frozen in time. Leah unbuckled me from my seat and helped me up, helped me walk through her front door before getting me seated on her couch with our dogs before walking into the kitchen to get that soup that she’d promised me.

When she did finish warming up the soup I was melting into the couch practically, our dogs, Scout and Saidee had apparently gotten the message that I needed them, so both of them were draped on top of me, it was what I needed. Leah returned with a bowl of soup and placed it down on our coffee table before sliding in next to me on the couch.

“I’d give the soup a few minutes to cool down, how about we talk until then?”

I didn’t want to talk, but it didn’t seem like I had a choice.

“What do you want to talk about?”

“How long have you been feeling not okay?”

It was a rough question, but not something that I hadn’t been expecting.

“Honestly, a few weeks, since my move here. I love you and I love being with you but being here isn’t easy for me and I’m struggling to settle in.”

Leah nodded, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy for her to hear, that’s probably why I’d avoided telling her for as long as possible. Arsenal was her family, Arsenal ran in her blood and I knew that there was a chance she’d take it personally that I hadn’t been finding it easy to settle in.

“Okay, I wish you’d told me earlier but that’s okay. Change isn’t easy, I can’t blame you for struggling. Obviously, I love having you here but if it’s not meant to be then it’s not meant to be. I’m sorry if I haven’t been focusing on you enough, I know that I’ve been so occupied with everything else but that isn’t a good enough reason for me to have been neglecting you. I have to ask this question, were you going to kill yourself tonight?”

I took a deep breath through my nose, no one is ever prepared for that question, it’s not something anybody wants to hear or talk about ever.

“Look, I’m not quite sure. I wasn’t really thinking, if you hadn't showed up, maybe. I don’t know Leah, I just know that I was feeling so fucking out of control and when I fele out of control I stop thinking.”

Leah just pursed her lips, it was clear that she didn’t know exactly what to say, or she was trying to put what she was thinking into words.

“Okay, that’s okay. Obviously it’s not okay, but that’s okay. We have options here, you have options. Let’s book an appointment with your therapist tomorrow, firstly. Secondly I think you and I should maybe sit down and have a proper conversation about your mental health, just so that I can become more educated on it and I can be more aware of these kinds of situations, because I want to be. I love you y/n and I want to be here to support you fully, but if I’m going to do that I need to understand how I can love you but also look after you and help you, because I want to.”

I was anxiously patting our dogs stomach, as I thought about how the fuck I was going to talk to Leah about this.

“I’ve had fucked up mental health since I was a kid, it fluctuates, you know that I get panic attacks and spouts of depression. Sometimes it worsens, Lucy can give you more details, honestly I don’t think I’m the best at explaining it. Sometimes I get really low, I’ve had my fair share of suicidal thoughts and self harm over the years, I’ve never gone through with anything and honestly my mental health has been really good over the year or so, that was why I didn’t flag it with you, and I’m sorry I didn’t. I am so sorry that you had to see me like that, I’m sorry that your fucking worrying about me.”

Leah’s arm wove its way around my waist, bringing me flush against her and it felt so right in that moment.

“Y/n, look at me.”

It was the first time that I’d looked her in the eyes the whole night and it kind of hurt in some bizarre way staring into her brown eyes. They were full of so much emotion, so much feeling and pain in them.

“You should not be sorry for having human emotion. I’m sorry for not seeing the warning signs, for not being around enough to see the signs. I’m still learning, I’m trying to be better for you, so let’s just agree that neither of us are perfect. This is new to me, but I’m going to try my fucking hardest for you, whatever you need. We’re going to make you feel happier, put that smile back on your face that made me fall in love with you, if it’s the last thing I do. Maybe we take a break if that’s what you need, or we explore other options, anything to make you feel happier, anything for my girl.”

[ourfinalembrace]

the outsiders is one of them books for me that finds you just when you need it. my mam had been trying to get me to read it for years because it was her favourite book from when she was growing up and she knew i would love it, but each time she suggested it, i just shrugged it off. i'm what i call a very picky reader, so a lot of book suggestions i get are disregarded. then, when i was 15, i went through a trauma. it was nothing massively 'serious,' but it was enough to stop me sleeping for a good 9-10 months. every night when everyone else was asleep in bed, i would have my light switched on and i would be reading book after book after book. eventually i got tired of reading the same books over and over again, so i finally picked the outsiders up and honestly...i read the first page and i already knew it was the best decision i'd ever made. the nights i spent wide awake reading because the thought of even trying to go to sleep was terrifying, were incredibly lonely. my only company were my own thoughts, and with each night that went by, i felt more and more isolated, from people and from reality. reading the outsiders made me feel less alone. not only could i see myself in more than one of the characters, there were also striking resemblances between scenes in the novel and my own life. e.g. towards the end, just before the rumble, when ponyboy tells cherry he can see the sunset too as a poetic way of saying she isn't alone and that she has someone who understands. when i was a young child, i had a best friend named cameron, and we were inseperable. we would see each other at school, then go to each other's house after, and then we would see each other at the weekend too. but then he moved to the other end of the country and, even though i was young and had plenty of other friends to play with in the playground, i did miss him. and one day i asked my mam if cameron saw the same moon as i did from where he was now living, to which my mam said yes, and that made me realise i didn't have to miss him because we were under the same moon. reading that scene in the novel brought me a sense of peace that i'd needed for a long time. and whilst i wouldn't claim the book solved all of my issues - it was merely a temporary fix for the lonely, fearful nights - it definitely made things a lot easier.

[moonlight-prose]

pretty please may i request ❛i once imagined you loved me a little bit, if you’ll excuse the presumption.❜ from the &. 𝐟. 𝐬𝐜𝐨𝐭𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐭𝐳𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬. prompt list with loki? clawing at the walls tysm 🌷

LOVE IS A SMOKE MADE WITH A FUME OF SIGHS

a/n: i haven't written anything this angsty is so long and it felt good to finally churn out that type of fic. i miss breaking these character's hearts. so babes i hope you know that i went so fucking pretentious with this one it actually made me pick up shakespeare just to title it. (yes it's from romeo and juliet which is ironic cause it's a love between a god and a human). but anyways i hope you enjoy! and of course the gif is crimson peak. it matched the vibe.

summary: you were never meant to be apart of their world, of his home. you were a mortal amongst gods and the time for your parting had finally come.

OR the heartbreak of losing someone who is half your soul.

word count: 2k

pairing: loki x reader

warnings: not explicit, angst, heartbreak, overly pretentious prose about love and pain, mention of death, waxing poetically about losing love, not edited because we live and die by the fucking pen.

The tragedy of love has always been steeped in irony to you. After all, there was something of hilarity bound between the emotions that connected two people so deeply they’d go to war for it. Or perhaps die for it. Maybe this belief came from never understanding it—never experiencing it for yourself. But how were you supposed to know what it looked like? What it felt like, when you had no notion of it even existing in the first place.

Maybe it was a well thought out joke that pulled people in, capturing them in the depths of something so mysterious. You understood heartbreak. Knew the depravity that came from having something ripped from you without a notion of consequence. But love…that remained as mythical to you as Lancelot and Guinevere.

You could feel his eyes on you the longer you stood there, fiddling with the drink in your hand. It wasn’t often that an Asgardian invited a human to visit their land and it was a rarity when it happened with a prince. But that’s where you wound up. Standing amidst legends and myths wanting to flee at a moment's notice. And he watched in earnest, with the hope that you would turn to catch his gaze.

“Excuse me,” you said with a smile to the man beside you who had been talking about the nonsense of science for thirty minutes.

Whether or not he actually believed the words he said became an afterthought. You couldn’t stand there and pretend any longer. You didn’t want to.

Music filled the surrounding space, drowning you in the joyous leisure of having nothing to worry about. What could possibly trouble such powerful beings? Where you were nothing but a small speck in the grand scheme of things. Something trivial that would one day pass and be extinguished just as fast as you were ignited.

You saw the way they viewed you the second you crossed the threshold of the hall. How they seemed to pity you. They would go on. They would continue to carve their names in the history of the universe and you would be but a fleeting memory in their minds. The most you could hope for was to place a smile on their face for a moment before you were gone entirely.

People danced wherever you went, others laughed and boasted about their triumphs. And you could feel the air begin to press out of your lungs. As if they were slowly stripping you of everything that made your body work. You gasped, pushing open a door that led to the courtyard in the hopes that you’d make it to a secluded area before you broke down entirely.

Flames were lit to preserve the warmth. They casted a glow along the architecture of the stone walls—trees placed perfectly along the outskirts. The temptation to hide away here lingered in your chest, but you could practically feel the seconds tick by. You only had a limited amount of time before people made their way outside to view the night sky.

Any other night this would be the most romantic setting to find yourself in. Tonight however you were plagued by a pain that refused to fade.

You wiped roughly at the tears that began to fall as footsteps echoed behind you. It seemed that your time was running out faster than you expected and you’d be caught in the open with no explanation to why you were crying. Maybe if you ran you wouldn't have to deal with the questions. But then the warm glow of the fire flickered an emerald green, sparks flying into the air and you felt the energy around you shift.

“I caught you leaving.”

The smile was prominent in his tone—light enough to presume he didn’t know why you were here. Yet no matter how much he tried to conceal his emotions…you could always read him like an open book. A fact he loathed about you.

“I needed air,” you replied, clasping your hands together.

“You will find plenty out here.” Another step echoed like a shot ringing through the air and suddenly he was pressing a hand to your shoulder. The cold sensation of his touch rippled through you. It flooded your senses with more than you could process at this time.

With a sharp gasp, you pulled away. “Don’t.”

“I’m not sure I understand—”

“Loki,” you sighed, finally giving in. With another breath, you turned to face him—the glimmer of tears now unmistakable in your eyes. “What am I doing here?”

You could see the mistake the second the words left your mouth to hang in the air between you. As if this was the final reckoning of something so delicate. The question had been building for days since he brought you with him. Something to explain that maybe…this wasn’t just a frivolous one time fling that he’d forget about soon after you returned home. But nothing ever came. It seemed he was more interested in showing you off to everyone else, rather than letting you in.

“You’re here for dinner of course.” He smiled, offered you his hand, and faltered when you didn’t take it. When you stood where you were with a somber look in your eyes.

The green color flared to life beside you again, reflecting his emotions and finally giving you an insight into his mind. But it wasn’t enough.

You wanted to know how he felt. What was he too scared to tell anyone? Perhaps he might let you in on it. But Loki had always been closed off even to those he cared about and you didn’t want to be simply another person he tried to love. You needed more than empty words and flowery promises. As you watched him come up with something to say you could see it. He knew that this wasn’t enough; that you wouldn’t be wooed by parties you had no place in with people you held no interest for.

“I think it’s time for me to go home.” You bit down on the inside of your cheek to stop the tears from starting up again.

“My darling—”

“I don’t belong here Loki,” you admitted. “Everyone in there can see that I am not one of you.”

His gaze turned sharp. “One of us?”

“You know what I mean. I’m not a god.” You stood a bit straighter as if facing the oncoming battle.

“So you think because you aren’t Asgardian that we will think less of you? That I would…” He snapped his mouth shut, eyes darker than you were used to seeing them.

“No!”

“Don’t believe for a second that I brought you here under false pretenses—”

“Then why did you bring me?” you exclaimed. “Because it certainly doesn’t feel like you actually want me here. You left me alone in there! As if I was meant to be shown off for some Asgardian amusement.”

He stepped forward, crowding into your space and like the stubborn human you were…you stood your ground. His lips quirked up slightly, admiration flaring in his eyes before that too was stolen away.

“You forget. I am not Asgardian.”

You scoffed, rising up to meet him—your nose brushing so close to his that you could feel his breath against your face. “That is not who I saw in there.”

His eyes dropped to your lips. The darkness from before returning with a vigor that stole your breath away. No matter how much you wanted to remain upset, you couldn’t deny the pull that existed between you. The longing you felt in your heart. Loki released a shuddered breath as his eyes dragged back to yours and something raw clicked into place.

Cupping your cheek, he dragged you forward until his lips met yours. Loki always kissed you as if this was his last time, as if he would never know the sweet taste of oxygen without you. You were the soothing balm against his wounds that refused to close. A piece of serenity in a place that bred nothing but chaos. He dragged you closer, no longer hesitant to lick into your mouth and drag out a moan, because what else did he have to lose?

You knew the malice that existed in him—had seen it first hand. Yet even that wasn’t enough to turn you away from this.

To make you flee from the man who viewed himself as a monster.

“Loki,” you sighed, fingers digging into the leather beneath his armor. It was as soft as his touch, the scent intoxicating you the longer you stood there.

“Don’t…” He could feel the hesitation in your kiss. The uncertainty in your touch.

You still remained unsure of what he wanted from you; what this actually meant to him. And even though he wanted to proclaim it loud enough for you to hear, he knew that you’d never truly understand the depths of his emotions. Loki had always believed he would remain alone in his life. A lost soul doomed to wander the universe for all eternity, but when he met you he hoped that for a moment…he would finally feel the warmth of the sun against his skin once more.

He hoped he would feel alive again.

“You are…” Warm tears fell against your cheeks and he wiped them away gently. “You’re the one I want to be with. The one I choose.” You cupped his hand in yours, desperate to keep his touch against your skin. “But I am not immortal.”

“We gods die too.”

You smiled. “Not in the way humans do.”

Silence washed over the both of you. A solemn understanding that began to infiltrate even his mind. And thus was the irony of love. Two souls so tragically different that even death would keep you apart until the very end of time. You almost laughed, but knew that the situation would only be ruined by it.

“I need to go home where I belong.”

“You belong—”

“I don’t belong with gods Loki. I never have. And no matter how much you want that to change it can’t.”

Within seconds you watched his walls begin to close up again, pulling back any sense of emotion he once showed. Until you were right back where you started. Alone in the middle of a world that didn’t deem you worthy to stand on it. You were the outsider looking in. A mortal who got a chance to dine with the gods of old and briefly pretend you were one of them.

“So you choose them.”

An ache sprouted in your chest, spreading down to the very tips of your fingers. Until you swore you couldn’t breathe. A necessary evil to stave off the heartbreak of what would eventually come down the road.

“My love…”

He pulled away, standing stiff and face void of any emotion. “That word doesn’t belong to me. Not anymore.” Turning slightly, he roughly wiped at his cheek to hide the tears. Meanwhile you allowed them to fall freely. “I once imagined you loved me a little bit, if you’ll excuse the presumption.”

With a final look—eyes filled with a plea to say something—he relented. He nodded his head, took in a large breath, and turned back towards the steps. Once again leaving you behind as he returned to a world you’d never fully understand. You watched him go, a sob wracking your body as he took with him a love that only came around once in a lifetime. As he took part of your soul.

The flames returned to their natural orange glow, once again emitting a warmth that should have flooded your body. But all you felt was the cold touch of a lover lost to you for good.

[thecoolerspringbon-t]

Here are some sketches I made of “The Missing Co-Workers event” And some details I enjoyed when making it.

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I have to start with my favorite ending I drew:

The Figurine ending!

I had to draw inspiration from The Creation of Adam painting, no specific reason, I just thought it would look cool.

At first I thought putting everyone of the ending on the planks that lead to the figurine on the Cargo Lift (Image on the left). But I figured, the first figurine that we find in the TSP2 expo would look way better giving that amazing feeling you get when you collect them all! (Image on the right).

I'm happy with the result, I feel like there’s something so poetic about it, like when you first get that ending …

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Ah! The confusión ending!

This one also had some changes, mostly on the first image (Left)

What I wanted is to everyone to be confused! That’s why no one looks happy in it (Except for the people who looked at the fern lol!)

But I also wanted some people to find the pages of Employee 432's lore. So it was either the secret hallway or the archives room.

I figured the archives room would be better, leaving everyone to wonder what they could find there…

Once again, I'm happy with the result on all the whole ending, I think it very much captures the feeling of dread and frustration you get when first playing this ending!

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The silly ones I also enjoyed drawing were the Is This… a Bucket? Ending (left) Mostly because of @mrfisherot Oc, They sent me their cartoon-y Oc but I asked if I could do the literal png character they had and so I did! So he’s just there… fishing… It was so funny, I really enjoyed it!

And the Mariella Ending (right), This one was special! I think it’s the only ending where the oc faces cannot be seen, I felt bad for doing that but I'm glad both @whosectype and @pawl3ss liked the result. And of course, I had to do the Family Guy dead pose LMAO!

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And finally…

The Skip Button Ending…

The people in the skip button Ending were supposed to be on different scenarios (Images below) than the one the ended up being in the end (upper images)

I wanted to capture the same things I felt when playing this, fear, confusion, regret and amusement. I thought to myself “What would they do if they were trapped in a room for an eternity with everything around them changing?…

…And then… having freedom, just to realize everything is gone”…

This was the last image I drew, I remember tearing up from drawing the characters and thinking about the sense of freedom but at what cost?… I still like it, I think about this one a lot…

I'm not sure if I captured the feelings I wanted to portray but I'm still proud. This event was a hell to finish because of problems and delays but I'm so happy of seeing people find their friends on the drawings! to find each other! To find the missing co-workers…

Thank you for reading and participating!

-Spring

[squib-2006]

Dr pt2 spoiler warning

This was a fantastic set of episodes

• Kai and wyldfire are everything. Kai having to deal with someone who acts like he did in the earlier seasons is poetic justice and funny as hell.

• I also like how they kinda tried to explain why Kai seemed calm after sea bound and nyas seaifcation. I guess Kai meditating with wu would make him calmer. At least it confirms that Kai was upset (even if they didn’t show it)

•I am kinda upset that nothing from skybound was brought up with the Djinn. I personally don’t really like skybound but I still find that it could be used more than just oh yah that happened right wink wink. I mean we had to suffer through skybound for something right?

• I actually really liked sora and nyas whole plot with the Djinns curse. It was fun and had a nice conclusion.

• Coles return is great I love his little gang in the land of forgotten things. My favorite has to be the skeleton girl (I forgot her name probably cuz they only say it like 2 times) she’s funny.

• I do wish there was a scene where nyas like btw I found Cole and the other ninja react. I mean she does mention it at the end but no one except Zane has any real reaction.

• Beatrix going off the rails was really funny. It felt like someone gave a teen with daddy issues an insta death weapon.

• rapton switching sides kinda came out of left field for me. Like the guy isn’t the brightest bulb in the box I think it would be more likely for other characters to switch sides. Also how did he recover from being tased so quickly? Man was out cold and not two minutes later he was up and walking around.

• kinda felt that the whole being sucked into non existence should have had more lasting effects (totally not because I want to traumatize or brutally injure Kai no why would I want that /s) tho fake out deaths are pretty par for the course with ninjago, this one actually didn’t make me feel all that much cuz I knew the moment wyldfire got pulled in that this was a fake out. They wouldn’t kill one of there new characters that quickly.

•so wus just legitimately fudging dead. Never thought we would see the day when this old mad would just peace out. Also ghost wu legit looks like he’s slowly loosing his form or something cuz in the first half he appears with his full body but in the last scene he’s in he’s just a chest and a head. It might have just been a stylistic thing tho.

•I’m not mad jay only showed up for around 30 seconds (this just might be my bias tho cuz jays probably the ninja I care the least about, not that I hate him or anything he’s just not that interesting to me) it’s kinda refreshing for me cuz nya gets to be her own character for a bit and not be completely attached to Jay and Jay gets to take up less screen time (if I am being honest Jay had so much focus in the wild brain seasons it kinda got annoying to me personally) idk if he’s actually lost his memories or if that leak is wrong cuz it would make sense cuz he has not searched for the ninja (specifically nya cuz that man is a simp for his gf) Arin missing him by a second is hilarious to me.

•not sure about how I feel about Lloyd being the linchpin for the entire thing. Part of me thinks that it would have fit the shows themes better if all of them used their elemental powers or something else to power the cores to fix everything. But another part of me understands that Lloyd get main character privileges cuz he’s the son of ninjago god.

•still kinda frustrated that they are changing how elemental powers work. Originally they were from the first spinjitzu master, but the whole source dragon being the source (for lack of a better word) of the elemental powers, it completely retcons and nerfs the first spinjitzu master. It would have made more sense if they still came from the powers of the fsm and were gifted through the source dragons to people.

•the implication of the cursed realm merging with the rest of the realms brings up the question if the departed realm merged to? Does that mean no one can die??? Or is there some sort of force that still keeps the departed realm separated from the rest (like how the people in the land of the forgotten can’t leave) or can some dude just wander in to the departed realm and see like there dead grandma chilling with the fsm having tea or some crap like that.

•Lloyd going I forgot there are two of them now towards Kai and wyldfires antics is peak writing. And all the arson and explosions the two created is just beautiful.

•I think the Kai and wyldfire duo should be called like the arsonist or the kaboom duo

•THE HUGGG!!!! My boi was so happy looking when the tackle hug was done.

•I just cant get my brain to shut up about these two. They give off tired dad who sometimes gives in to his old chaotic ways he’s sworn he’s grown out of and living embodiment of chaos and fun daughter who drags her dad into crazy things.

Tdlr I loved this second half and had a few issues with it but it was still really good.

[raaorqtpbpdy]

Love and War

Sam is struggling with a lot of things. She's half-ghost, she's in love with her two best friends, she's desperately trying to keep both those things a secret, and to top it all off, one of those two best friends is missing, and she's doing everything she can to find him.

For the prompts: Sam has two secrets. One: She's in love with her two best friends. Two: She's a ghost. [from @carelisswriting] Danny has been missing for 2 weeks. Sam and Tucker find him floating, unconscious, in the Ghost Zone, but something's different when he wakes up. [from @hippykattrs], and Reverse trio au but through a series of shenanigans Danny still ends up being the ghost king [from Yellow]

Read also on AO3

[Warning for canon-typical violence and kidnapping]

Sam Manson had only two real, genuine, secrets. The kind of secrets a person held close to their chest and kept as if their life depended on it. The kind of secrets a person lied and tricked people in order to keep, no matter how guilty it made them feel. First, that she was a ghost; and second, that she was in love with her two best friends.

The first of those secrets, only her two best friends knew. They were the two people she trusted most in the world, and the only two people she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt wouldn't ever share that secret, even under threat of death.

The other secret, she hadn't told even them. And she probably never would.

It wasn't that she didn't trust them with it, of course she did. It was just that she didn't want to make things awkward between them. Her being a ghost only changed their entire world-view and understanding of human mortality. But her other secret, her secret crush—that getting out could ruin everything.

Her feelings weren't knew to her. Back in eighth grade, she'd started to develop a crush on both of them at the same time, and she'd thought she was a bad person for not being able to pick just one person to like. She'd since gotten over that, because she'd decided it was stupid, and then a little bit after that, she'd also learned what polyamory was, which cemented her decision that her guilt had been stupid.

As time passed, her feelings grew beyond just a couple of simple crushes, and into genuine, actual love, so strong that it hurt a little. She always scoffed and rolled her eyes when the subject of romance came up, pretending she wasn't interested, and that she thought anyone who would waste their time with something so ridiculous, especially in high school, was an idiot.

It helped to keep her true feelings hidden, even though every time she listened to Tucker all but waxing poetic about the most recent tech he'd found at the scrapyard and was gutting, either to repurpose into recycled tech or new techno-goth accessories—or heard Danny bragging about getting the high score on the NASA shuttle flight simulator, or ranting about stars, she was sure they were written all over her face.

She was down bad, and she knew it—but she would rather die than admit it and risk changing their group's whole dynamic, or even worse, losing her friends completely because she'd made it weird between them.

Danny and Tucker had been friends practically since they were born, but Sam had only become their friend in the sixth grade, and even though that was still a solid three years at this point, she still felt that three years wasn't enough to cement her position if she did something too crazy, like confessing her undying love out of nowhere—not that she would do it like that, because even if she was brave enough to confess at all, that would be coming on way too strong.

The other secret was... more recent. Freshman year had barely started, and the three of them were all hanging out at Danny's house. His parents had made a portal, claiming that it would lead to a place called the Ghost Zone. Unfortunately, it didn't work. It was still cool enough—in theory, at least—that Danny took Sam and Tucker down into his parents' lab to show it to them.

Sam took a couple of pictures. It did look really cool, for a hole in the wall. very futuristic and techie.

"You should go inside and let me take a picture of you," Sam suggested to Danny.

"Are you kidding?" Danny scoffed. "This is untested technology, what if I get electrocuted or something?"

"Fine, I'll do it, and you can take the picture," Sam replied with a roll of her eyes. "It doesn't work, anyway." She handed her camera off to Danny.

"At least put a protective jumpsuit on?" Danny requested. "I don't wanna see you get hurt."

"That's sweet," Sam said. Her tone was sarcastic, but her feelings were genuine. Danny always was sweet—and was only sometimes a bit of a jackass. "Make sure to get the whole portal in the picture. Don't just focus on me and ignore the background."

She borrowed one of Danny's jumpsuits and put it on over her clothes. It was a bit loose on her, and Sam always somehow managed to destroy or stain white clothes, but her main complaint was the big Jack Fenton decal on the chest, which she promptly tore off and threw away.

"I'm not walking around with your dad's face on my chest," she said, then went to stand just inside the portal. "Alright, take the picture."

Danny did, and once the flash faded, Sam turned around to get a look at the big, steel tunnel she was standing in. It was cold and dark, and gave her a strange almost menacing sort of energy that made her body feel like it was buzzing, and she kind of dug it, to be honest. It was weird, but cool.

"This this is actually really cool," she remarked, taking a few steps further in.

"Be careful, Sam!" Danny shouted after her.

The deeper she got in, the stranger it became. In the darkness, the seams in the metal interior seemed to faintly glow and pulse with green, like something was trying to squeeze its way through the cracks, even though the portal didn't work.

Before Sam knew it, she was all the way at the back of the tunnel, and there was some kind of iris shaped mechanism. It, too, appeared to glow, ever so faintly in the dark. Too curious for her own good, Sam put her gloved hand on the mechanism. That turned out to be a mistake.

It happened in an instant, too fast for her to even scream. And when she gasped it felt as if her throat was being filled with silly putty and she choked. Her body was flooded with energy. Simultaneously, red hot pain tore through her every molecule, and an icy chill engulfed her like she'd just fallen through the ice into a frozen lake. The force of the energy from that mysterious mechanism sent her flying backwards as a bright, toxic green filled her vision, pressing in on her from all sides.

The next thing she knew, she was flat on her back in the Fentons' lab, with Danny and Tucker both leaning over her, repeating her name in panicked tones.

"Hm?" she groaned out. "What... what happened?"

Danny and Tucker looked at each other, both of them seemingly at a loss. Danny still had her Polaroid camera, and he held it up and snapped a picture of her, for some reason. She flinched at the flash.

The photo printed, and Danny pulled it off the camera and started to shake it. "Now... don't freak out when you see it but..." he looked at the picture with a pained expression. "Here."

When he turned it around to show her, she couldn't believe what she was seeing. If she hadn't watched him take the picture, she wouldn't have believed it was even her in it. Her hair had turned shock white, and her violet eyes a glowing green. In the back of her mind, almost hysterically, she noted that the jumpsuit was black now, meaning she had once again managed to ruin another piece of white clothing—although it definitely wasn't just a nasty-sauce stain this time.

"What... happened to me?" she asked, her voice a raspy croak.

"I think... you're a ghost," Danny said.

"But hey," Tucker added, obviously trying to bring up the mood. "At least you look cool!"

She did, admittedly, look very cool. Although the dark and spooky aesthetic was more in line with Tucker's than her own.

As it turned out, Sam was only half ghost, or at the very least, if she was a ghost, she could transform to look basically human. If she looked very closely in the mirror, she could see the differences from the way she looked before. The way her hair was lighter, and seemed to almost float whenever she turned her head. The ways her eyes reflected when she moved, or when light shined directly on them.

It was fine.

She was fine.

That had been a few months ago, now, and with the help of all the ghost hunting technology Danny managed to 'borrow' from his parent's lab (though he usually had to modify it with his own engineering skills to make it actually work), Sam had become something of a hero around Amity Park—the Specter. Once Sam had gotten the portal working, other ghosts started to cause come through it into Amity Park, and unlike Sam they all seemed to want to stir up trouble. Although Danny liked to argue that Sam stirred up plenty of trouble herself too.

He used to argue anyway.

But the problem Sam was facing right now wasn't secrets, or crushes, or ghosts. The problem she was most worried about at the moment, was the fact that Danny had been missing for two weeks. According to his parents, he'd been carried off by a ghost, one who hadn't stopped long enough for a chat.

She and Tucker were pretty sure he was somewhere in the Ghost Zone, but that hardly narrowed it down. The Ghost Zone was endless, infinite, impossibly vast. They could search for decades and never find Danny. That didn't deter them in the slightest though. They couldn't get away with just abandoning their lives to search for their friend, but every day after school, and all through the weekends, Sam and Tucker had borrowed the Fenton's Specter Speeder and gone into the Ghost Zone to search for him.

In two weeks, they hadn't seen hide nor hair of Danny. They had, however, seen the Ghost Zone looking more dismal and chaotic than they'd ever seen it before. Fights breaking out left and right, skeletal ghosts swarming places. As much as Sam wanted to help, they couldn't afford to stop. They had a lot of ground to cover, and they had no idea if Danny was even still alive.

By three am, they had found nothing, and decided to call it before they made themselves late for school in a few hours. They'd be back again the next day at 3:30 to search some more.

And they did.

But when they came back at 3:30, everything was different. Peaceful.

Somehow, all the aggressive skeletal soldiers had magically vanished, and the chaos that had defined the Ghost Zone since they started the search for their friend had died down in just a few hours. There were no fights, no new destruction.

The ghosts they saw paid them no attention, focused on rebuilding and cleaning up the various carnage and detritus of the previous battles. None of them seemed the slightest bit concerned about being attacked again.

Just in case, Sam and Tucker kept the ghost shield around the specter speeder active, but it was the strangest thing. For the last two weeks, it had been like the Ghost Zone was a war zone, and now the war had somehow ended. Curious as it was, it didn't matter to their search for their missing friend. They could try to figure out what had happened later, once Danny was safely back with them.

After a few hours, as they started to steer into another area they hadn't searched yet, they saw rows of ghosts, floating silently in the green.

"What are they doing?" Tucker whispered, as if he was worried they might hear him and get angry if he spoke too loud.

"I don't know," Sam whispered back. "I'm gonna take us up a little higher so we can see what's going on."

She pulled back on the steering and took them up over the rows of ghosts. From above, they could see the ghosts lined up almost as if on the banks of an invisible river. In the distance, the ghosts standing what would be upriver, started to float away in a wave.

"What are they doing?" Sam echoed Tucker's question. "I'm gonna fly us closer."

Tucker nodded and she brought them in. As they got closer to where the ghosts were leaving their positions, they could see something floating down the invisible river. When the object—the figure, they realized as they approached—drifted past them, they would fall out of line and float away, as if they'd been standing vigil until it passed for some reason.

"Wait a minute, is that...?" Tucker stated to say, squinting at the drifting figure.

"Danny!"

Sam immediately put on the speed, bringing them right over the drifting figure.

"Deactivate the ghost shield," she said. "I'm going ghost."

Tucker hit the button and Sam, in the ghost form, dropped out through the lower hatch to grab Danny. After two weeks of searching, he was just floating there, unconscious. And all these ghosts seemed happy to stand around and watch without bothering to help him.

When Sam wrapped her arms around her unconscious friends, the ghosts around them hissed and jeered.

"You dare lay a hand on him?" one demanded.

"Back off! He's my friend," she all but snarled at them.

"The Specter..." a different ghost observed. "She must be."

"He is safe, then," said another.

Word started to spread down the line, and steadily, all the ghosts dispersed. For a moment, Sam just watched, then she shook her head and flew herself and Danny back into the Specter Speeder.

"We're in! Reactivate the ghost shield," she called out.

Tucker did so, and as soon as he hit the button, he hurried over to them.

Gently, Sam laid Danny out on the floor and started checking him over for injuries. He still had a pulse, so that, at least, was a good sign. Less good was the fact that he was covered in scrapes and burns, although none of them seemed too severe.

"We should take him to a hospital when we get back, but he should be okay," Sam said.

"You should take him to a hospital," Tucker corrected, holding his hands up. "I don't do hospitals... should we try to wake him up?"

Sam gently tapped Danny's cheeks. Her heart was pounding and she didn't think she'd ever been so worried for anyone in her life. Or so relieved.

Danny groaned slightly.

"Danny," she said softly. "Danny, wake up."

He groaned some more and blinked his eyes open, squinting up at them. His irises had a strange, iridescent quality that Sam recognized vaguely from her own. But they also weren't like her own in a way she couldn't quite describe. Whatever it was, by reaching out with her ghost sense, she could at least tell for absolutely sure, that Danny was still human, and a not a ghost, or half-ghost like her.

"Sam?" he asked. "Tucker? What are you doing here?"

"Us?" Tucker scoffed, "What are you doing here? You've been gone for, like, two weeks. What happened to you?"

Danny chuckled weakly. "That's... kind of a long story," he replied.

The two of them helped him up off the hard floor of a speeder and into a chair, then Sam went to program the autopilot to take them back to the Fenton Portal.

"We've got time," Tucker told him, crossing his arms.

Sam had always thought it would be kind of uncomfortable to cross one's arms with fishnet sleeves, but Tucker never seemed to mind it.

Now that he was sitting up and moving and stuff, Sam noticed that Danny looked a little thin. He probably hadn't been getting enough to eat or drink in the Ghost Zone the past two weeks. Luckily, they kept a very well-stocked snack drawer in the specter speeder, and a case of bottled water, too.

Once he had some food in him, Danny was much more willing to talk, and he started to tell them the story of his time in the Zone, starting with his kidnapping.

"While I was helping my parents in their lab," he began, "you know, tweaking their designs, thinking about what might be useful to the three of us ghost hunting as usual. And the portal was open, because we figured if anything came through, there were three of us in the lab, surrounded by ghost hunting equipment, so it would be fine.

"But the ghost that came through didn't want to fight, or escape. He just flew in, grabbed me, and flew back through the portal. It was a matter of seconds. I'm sure my parents tried to chase after us, but in the time it would have taken them to get to the specter speeder, the ghost had taken me far away."

"Why you?" Sam asked. "What did you do to tick off this ghost?"

"Nothing," Danny told her. "He actually thought I was you."

She stiffened. Honestly, she shouldn't have been all that surprised. Ever since she started kicking their asses and sending them home with their tails between their legs, ghosts had been coming after Sam left and right, but they always wanted to pick fights, not kidnap her. Well... arguably Skulker wanted to kidnap her, but he knew the difference between her and Danny.

"Why?" she asked again.

"Apparently there's this Ghost King, seriously bad dude, and a long time ago, he was imprisoned in this thing called the Sarcophagus of Forever Sleep. But a little while, somehow, he was released or broke out or something. Not really sure which. So basically, they wanted you because you're a halfa, and the way they told it, halfas are way more powerful than regular ghosts for some reason.

"Except they messed up," Danny said. "They knew the halfa was a teenager, and that you'd been turned by the Fenton Portal, but they didn't know who you were, so when Rustle came through the portal and immediately saw a teenager working near it, he assumed that I was the halfa."

"But then you explained the situation to them right?" Tucker guessed. They both knew damn well how much Danny loved to explain things—it was one of his most adorable and sometimes annoying—so it was a reasonable conclusion to draw. "Why didn't they bring you back?"

"I didn't get the chance to explain it to them until Rustle had taken me all the way back to the lair the resistance was using as a base of operations and they told me why they kidnapped me in the first place," Danny said. "By that point, the king's spies had told them about the resistance's plan and he sent a crap ton of his soldiers to block off access to the Fenton Portal. Once it was guarded, it was way too dangerous to send me back or try again to get the right person, so they had to make do with me.

"They told me I wasn't going home until the Ghost King was defeated."

Danny paused in his story to drink some more water and open another back of corn chips.

"Seriously Danny?" Tucker asked. "You're leaving us hanging for corn chips?"

Danny didn't bother to swallow before saying, "Dude, I haven't had human food in two weeks, okay? These corn chips taste like fuckin' heaven right now. You guys can wait."

"Come on, what happened next?" Sam asked.

Danny chewed faster and swallowed before finally continuing his story.

"Well, luckily, I'd been working on some prototype Fenton Tech when Rustle grabbed me, and I managed to hang onto it all the way to the base of operations. Plus, I always have some scraps on me, and Technus and Skulker were part of the resistance, and they have some pretty good tech, too.

"So I spent two weeks, with Technus as my incredibly annoying lab assistant that I had regularly threaten with violence to keep from stabbing me in the back, heavily supervised by the ghosts of the resistance, jury-rigging a super anti-ghost ray gun like some kind of megalomaniacal comic book supervillain. I barely had the time to eat or drink anything, and when I did, it was all ghost food, which was not doing great things for my productivity or energy levels, let me tell you.

"Eventually, though, I finished the weapon. I designed it to absorb energy from the plentiful ectoplasm in the Ghost Zone and harness it into a single, supercharged beam that would be powerful enough to bring any ghost to their knees, and it worked amazingly, if I do say so myself," Danny said. Then he went back to his chips like that was the end of the story.

"What happened after that?"

"Oh, I sniped the ghost king through a window of his keep, knocked him right back into the sarcophagus and blew the crown right off his head."

Tucker laughed.

"What's so funny?" Sam asked.

"Nothing," Tucker replied, shaking his head over his chuckles. "I just still can't get over the fact that engineering geek over here has the best aim of the three of us. Like, it I get why, because his freak parents have been teaching him marksmanship since he could pull a trigger, but it's still funny."

"Yeah, laugh it up," Danny said, smirking. "Which one of us defeated the ghost king, again?"

"I yield," Tucker told him. "What happened after that? You were unconscious when we found you?"

"Oh, well, the ray gun worked, but it kind of overloaded and blew up immediately after that," Danny said. "That's the last thing I remember, but judging by the lack of skeleton soldiers, one of the other resistance guys must've locked the sarcophagus when I was done with him. Not sure who it could have been, though, 'cause I didn't think they even had the key."

Upon hearing what Danny had been put through in his absence, Sam was overcome with emotion.

He'd been kidnapped, blackmailed, starved, forced to work with a ghost that had a very personal vendetta against him, to build a super-weapon that would have gone way against Danny's usual morals, and then defeat an incredibly powerful ghost, the literal king of all ghosts, with an unstable ray-gun that blew up immediately after use, knocked him out, and sent him careening, unconscious, through the Ghost Zone.

And Danny was trying to play it off. He was crunching on corn chips and casually waving off all the traumatic shit he'd just been through like it was no big deal, the same way he always waved off traumatic shit, and Sam... Sam couldn't take it anymore.

"Oh, Danny..." she said, her voice trembling with emotion and eyes wet with oncoming tears.

Her horror at what he'd been through combined with her relief that he didn't have to go through it anymore, and mixed with the feelings she'd been hiding for so long, and she didn't know if it was a case of her wires getting crossed or just momentary insanity, but she reached out and pulled him into a hug and kissed him right on the lips.

His lips tasted like salt and canola oil, and the second she realized what she was doing, Sam pulled back, her face turning an alarming shade of red.

For an unbearable moment, the awkwardness strangled out all sound. Then Tucker let out a forced chuckle.

"What, no kiss for me?" he joked. "You're makin' me feel left out."

Sam, halfway to panicked and not sure what else to do thought 'fuck it', and grabbed his cheeks to plant a kiss right on the lips and instantly smudge his black lipstick all the way up to his nose, unable to stay steady with how incredibly anxious she now was.

Whatever shade of red she'd turned before was so much darker now she felt lightheaded, and Tucker looked dazed as he brought two black-nailed fingers up to his lips in shock.

And just when Sam thought she might die of embarrassment, Danny reached over, grabbed Tucker by his black leather vest, and—whether to ease Sam's embarrassment, or for some other reason Sam couldn't possible comprehend, especially in her current state—he pulled the other boy close and kissed him, too.

They spent the rest of the, thankfully short, ride back to the Fenton Portal steeped in awkward silence. Once they were back in the human world, Tucker sealed the portal while Sam helped Danny upstairs to his parents so they could take him to the hospital.

They didn't say a word about the... kissing incident, even when they started talking again. At least, until about 1 am that night when Tucker sent them an IM on their private group chat.

TooFine: So... we ever gonna talk about that kissing junk? Cus its literally keeping me up at night

Sam was already awake when the message came in. To be honest, it was keeping her up too. She didn't want to say anything, didn't want to explain, but... actually, it felt like it might be easier to tell him, both of them, when there was a screen between them, as if it was a layer of protection. Even if Danny might not see it until later, since the hospital had decided to keep him overnight for observation—although his parents might have brought him his laptop to pass the time.

So Sam took a deep breath and started typing.

Samanson: actually... there's something i need to tell you guys.

Samanson: i've kind of had a crush on you - both of you - since middle school.

Samanson: a huge crush. probably more than a crush, honestly.

Samanson: i didn't want to say anything because i was worried about ruining our friendship, but i guess the cats out of the bag now.

Once she started, she had to forcibly stop herself from sending more messages and pouring out all her feelings in the group chat. She forced herself to sit still, wring her hands, and wait with bated breath for a response, even if she had to wait all night, because god knew she wasn't going to get any sleep after this.

After a long moment, a message came through.

SpaceDanny: Yeah....... me too, actually.

Sam very nearly cried with relief. Danny might tease her sometimes, like they all teased each other, but he knew when to take her seriously, too. She wasn't sure exactly how much he meant by that little 'me too', but at the very least it meant he didn't hate her.

TooFine: Wait ACTUALLY actually???

SpaceDanny: Yeah

Samanson: also yeah.

SpaceDanny: I had a whole sexuality crisis over it, but it was about the same you came out and I didn't wanna steal your thunder, so I decided to keep it to myself for a while.

SpaceDanny: And then I worked it up into such a big deal in my head somehow that I just never did '-_-

Samanson: sooo.......

Tucker hadn't actually said anything about it yet.

Which, on the one hand meant he hadn't shot them down, but the other hand followed that fact with a pretty damn big 'yet'.

Tucker continued to not say anything for several minutes, and Sam started to worry that he was just going to ghost them from now on, which, while ironic, would majorly suck. Even if he didn't want to date them, he was still their best friend and they didn't want to lose him. But they couldn't force him to stay, either.

Finally, another IM came through.

TooFine: You know what? Awesome

Sam let out a sigh of relief and fought back the waterworks again.

TooFine: Ill be real, Ive never really though about it before, but Im definitely not NOT into it. Im getting a girlfriend AND a boyfriend out of this and thats sick as hell.

TooFine: You guys wanna have a movie date saturday?

SpaceDanny: YES

TooFine: Yk, once weve all caught up on some sleep lol

Samanson: definitely. that sounds nice

SpaceDanny: So much yes do I want that

Sam did cry then, but she would never ever tell the two of them that. After the emotional roller coaster that day had been, she was just too happy to hold it in.

Things started to get... weird after that. Not because they all started dating, though. That part was really nice, and went amazingly well right off the bat with the three of them holding hands and cuddling up during school whenever they got the chance—to the point where Ms. Tetslaff called them out at lunch for excessive PDA. No, it was weird for other reasons.

None of them had sufficiently caught up on sleep by the time Saturday rolled around, and Danny still sported bandages from his hospital stay, but it didn't matter. They met up at the movie theater for a matinee and planned to go to dinner at Nasty Burger afterwards. They'd done the same exact thing on plenty of other Saturdays, but it was different this time.

They hit a tiny bump when they got to their seats and decided to to rock-paper-scissors for who got to sit in the middle, Sam won. It hardly mattered though. They pushed up the dividers between the seats, and all fell asleep halfway on top of each other before the halfway point of the movie. The usher had to wake them up and send them out so he could clean the theater before the next showing.

They had a good laugh about that as they all walked to the Nasty Burger.

Up until that point, it was going really well, and the three of them were all happy and having fun. Then a ghost showed up.

And that was when things started to get weird.

The ghost showing up wasn't weird in-and-of itself. Tucker and Danny knew the drill. They blocked Sam from view so she could go ghost and prepare for a fight. Ghosts came to fight Sam all the time, so this was nothing new. Except that this ghost wasn't there for Sam.

This ghost ignored her completely to fire off a ghost ray at Danny and demand that he fight them.

And that was weird.

Still, it wasn't exactly a problem. Danny activated his wrist ray, and although Sam co-opted the bulk of the battle, he provided some solid support. Within a few minutes, the two of them got the ghost into a position where Tucker could capture it in the Fenton thermos. Sam ducked behind them to change back, and they could be back on their way.

"Did you recognize that ghost, Danny?" Sam asked curiously. "One of your resistance friends?"

Danny shrugged and shook his head.

"Weird," Tucker noted.

"Yeah, that's so random," Sam agreed. "Why would a ghost go after Danny? Especially after he literally saved their whole dimension from an evil warmongering king. Way to show him your gratitude."

"I don't know, and I don't care," Danny said coolly. "I just want to go to Nasty Burger, and have dinner with my awesome boyfriend and girlfriend and not have to think about ghosts for a while."

He held out his hands for each of his partners to take, and they walked the rest of the way to Nasty Burger side by side by side, awkwardly and laughingly navigating past street lamps and telephone poles that made the sidewalks too narrow for the three of them shoulder to shoulder, never releasing each other's hands.

Danny got his wish to forget about ghosts for the rest of their date. But that night, he was woken up by a ghost coming into his room to try and attack him in his sleep. It didn't work, because Danny was a light sleeper, and went to bed wearing a wrist ray with an ecto-gun and a Fenton Thermos on his nightstand.

Sam and Tucker were both equally concerned and baffled when Danny told them about it when they came over to hang out the next day. Once could be written off as a fluke, and maybe twice could be a coincidence.

But it kept happening. Every day or two, a ghost would show up to challenge Danny for some reason.

It got to the point where Sam forced Danny to wear a specter deflector at all times for his safety, even though he constantly pouted about not being able to hold her hand or kiss her.

Tucker had rolled his eyes, promised to give him twice as many kisses to make up for it, and then called him a big baby.

Danny immediately started working on a way to make the specter deflector ignore Sam's unique ecto-signature, of course, because he was a sweetheart like that, but he kept getting interrupted by random ghosts showing up and demanding to fight him. Even when they couldn't touch him—either directly, or with ghost powers—they still tried.

It was after school when the three of them were all heading to Sam's house for bowling, that they got any semblance of an explanation.

Another ghost none of them recognized stopped them on the street, but this one was chattier than the others. She had long, flowing blue hair, and shimmering blue skin, and pointed an unnaturally long finger right at Danny.

"I, Mistress Mona, spectral siren, have come to challenge you for the throne of the Infinite Realms," she declared. "Prepare to meet your match, ghost king."

"What?" Danny breathed out, looking more confused than Sam had ever seen him.

The ghost didn't wait for them to ask questions though, she attacked them with a ghostly green wave that appeared out of nowhere, and started to sing.

The trio didn't give her song time to take effect. Danny shot her directly in the throat, silencing her with his perfect marksmanship, and then Sam kicked Mona's butt all the way back to the Ghost Zone. Or into the Fenton Thermos Tucker was holding, anyway.

"Why the hell did she call me the ghost king?" Danny asked. "I'm not the ghost king. The ghost king is Pariah Dark, and he's locked up in the Sarcophagus of Forever sleep."

"I think we're gonna have to take a rain check on bowling, boys," Sam said, turning around to walk back the way they came down the sidewalk. "We're going to the Ghost Zone, and we're gonna get to the bottom of this."

"What?" Tucker complained. "But I wanted to go bowling!"

"Me too, but there's no arguing with her when she gets like this," Danny said with a sigh, and the two of them followed Sam back toward Fenton Works.

Danny's parents were working up in the ops center today, so the lab was empty when the three of them arrived and Tucker went to warm up the specter speeder.

"You alright, Danny?" Sam asked, noticing that he looked a bit jittery.

"Hm? Yeah, I'm fine," he assured her.

He wasn't, but he always pretended none of this affected him. She wasn't sure if it was toxic masculinity making him think he had to be strong all the time and never tell her when he was stressed, or if he just didn't want to process everything he'd been through for some reason, or if his brain genuinely didn't register how much it was affecting him, but whatever the case, she knew she wasn't going to get anything out of him until or unless he wanted to tell her, so she didn't bother to push it.

"You don't have to go, if you don't want to," she told him instead. "I know the last time you were in the Ghost Zone wasn't exactly the best. If you don't want to go, Tucker and I can handle it."

"What? No," Danny said, frowning. "I'm the core of this problem, somehow, I'm not just gonna leave it to you guys to deal with on your own. I want to help."

"Alright," Sam conceded. He did make a good point. "If that's what you want, I won't stop you."

At that moment, Tucker hovered in with the specter speeder and Danny climbed in next to him.

Sam opted to go ghost and follow alongside this time, to more easily talk to people, since it seemed like they were probably going to have to ask around to get the information they were looking for from ghosts that passed.

Danny, however, had to stay in the speeder with the ghost shield active, because there was a good chance that as soon as they got into the Ghost Zone, he'd be swarmed by more foolhardy ghosts trying to fight him for some reason, and unlike Sam, he didn't have ghost powers to protect himself, just his wits and a specter deflector. And to be fair, he'd been doing pretty well on just those so far, but up until now he'd only ever had to fight one ghost at a time.

They stayed in communication via their Fenton-phones.

As expected, once they got into the Ghost Zone, they were approached by ghosts goading Danny to turn of the ghost shield and fight them head on, but they either gave up when they realized he wasn't dumb enough to do that, or Sam chased them off.

It wasn't long however, before Sam found a ghost that wasn't openly belligerent, and approached him. Although his clothes were very old fashioned, he was still recognizable as some kind of farmer.

"Excuse me," she said. "I'm Specter, and I was wondering if I could ask you some questions."

"Oh, of course," said the ghost. "Anything for the new king's general. Unlike those ruffians, I am forever grateful for his majesty saving us from his predecessor's rule."

"Uh... okaayyy, lot to unpack there," Sam said, turning up the receiver on her Fenton-phones so Danny and Tucker would be able to hear what the ghost Farmer said from inside the speeder, "but let's start with: how can Danny be the Ghost King? He's not even a ghost?"

"Doesn't matter mum," the farmer ghost said. "The title of ghost king is won in single combat."

"How does me sniping him from fifty yards away count as single combat?" Danny demanded in her Fenton-phones. "He never even saw my face! He never had the chance to fight back."

Sam relayed the question, as well as Danny's arguments to the farmer, who simply laughed.

"I don't make the rules, mum," he said. "Your friend made the machine that defeated the king, and he alone fired it. That makes him the new king, no ifs, ands, or buts about it."

"But... but..." Danny tried to complain, but he was drowned out by Tucker laughing at him.

Sam bit back a smile.

"What about what you said before about me being the new king's general?" Sam asked. "How does that work?"

"You're the ghost the king trusts to protect him personally, and whose advice on all tactical matters he heeds," the farmer replied. "That makes you his general."

Sam wanted to argue, but she supposed that all of that was technically true. She fought a lot of Danny's ghosts for him—with his help, of course. And when she'd told him to wear a specter deflector, he did, even though he didn't want to.

Ghost king's general, huh? That sounded kind of badass, actually.

"Thank you for your help, sir," she told the ghost.

"Think nothin' of it," he replied.

"This is ridiculous!" Danny grouched. "I can't be the ghost king! I'm not even a ghost!"

"Shoulda thought of that before you sniped Pariah Dark, I guess," Sam teased.

Tucker hadn't stopped laughing at him, and now that she wasn't mid-conversation and trying to keep her cool, Sam laughed too.

[sparkles-oflight]

Traces of kisses behind closed doors

Welcome to another fanfic of mine! I know you can read these separately, but I would actually recommend reading Kamila for some references you might miss if you don't.

Synopsis: Moments before Damon uploaded chapters 3 and 4, Bojan and Kris, and Nace and Jan talk about things that only happen behind closed doors.

This is like Hurt/comfort I think? Honestly, I'm not good at tagging things.

Disclaimer: Please think of these as characters and not the actual people. I don’t encourage anyone to send this to any of the actual JO members nor do I encourage people to force any type of relationship between anyone.

Sensible themes implied: Homophobia

Sitting in the bed that now belongs to him and his lover, Kris scrolled on his phone. Posting pictures, reading comments, seeing people freaking out through stories - in general, just trying to keep up with the flow of information and hype.

He felt two arms around his waist and a soft kiss on his arm.

- Reading comments? - Bojan asked as he tried to glance over his phone screen.

- Yes. - he smiled.

- You are insane. That would just trigger my anxiety.

- Well, I'm not you. - he smiled as he turned to him - I'm not a small flower that can break easily or be simply blown in the wind.

- Oh, feeling poetic, are we? I see.

- Maybe.

Kris kissed him, and, with his hand, he inclined Bojan's chin making the smaller one sit. Bojan savored that soft buttery kiss, yet he couldn't help but smile.

- What? - Kris asked while the other one laughed - What?

- I like seeing you like this. - his fingers started tapping Kris' hands, then arms, inspecting each centimeter of his limbs - I'm glad you enjoyed taking those pictures with Damon. And I'm even more glad you felt free to express yourself... Ever since-

- I know. - Kris took one of Bojan's hands and held it - Hey...do you know what Damon told me, Bojči?

Every time Kris called Bojan by his nickname it made his heart skip a beat. Sure, it's just a nickname that everyone calls him by, but coming from Kris' mouth makes it sound so different and relaxing...Bojan wanted to beg Kris to sing his name to his ear every single night because.... he loves Kris' voice when he's affectionate... God, he needed to stop himself from thinking about it for too long.

- Bojan? You good? You are drooling.

Bojan put his hand in his mouth only to realize he wasn't drooling.

- HAHA, I'm just fucking with you! - he laughed - In all seriousness, Damon told me you were the luckiest man in the world.

- Yet he decided to upload your pictures before mine. - he pouted, turned his head to the side, and crossed his arms.

- Oh? Are you jealous I'm his one muse?

- Maybe. - Kris turned his chin to him softly and kissed him again as Bojan relaxed his body - Or maybe...not. - he talked as Kris kissed him over and over again.

Bojan's mouth found its way to Kris' shoulder and then hand.

- I love your skin.

- Just my skin?

- And your company. And your kisses. – Kris’ hand ran through Bojan's chest - And your hair, and your voice, your eyes, and your beauty... On the inside and outside.

- I only believe I'm beautiful because of you...

- And I'm here to remind you of it every day.

Kris' eyes lit. How he had wished he were with Bojan since day one, but he would no longer waste any time separated from his soulmate... Not ever.

While kissing behind those closed doors, two other boys were in the living room relaxing - or trying to. Nace sat down as he scrolled through social media and Jan laid on the sofa with his legs on top of Nace's thighs and simply looked at the ceiling. His nail polish had practically vanished from his nails, and he was now completely far away from our reality, lost in thought.

Suddenly, he was awake by the touch of Nace, who had put his phone away, on his legs.

- What are you worried about? - Nace asked.

- Damon's pictures.

They had both talked about it before. Even if they were comfortable with each other - more than with anyone else in the world - even if their friends supported them and their relationship...What about the rest?

- Nace...We are from the Balkans. - Jan suddenly blurted it out.

Nace traced his legs with his fingers.

- Everyone around us seems to be okay with our relationship...but what if they aren't? And what about the band? - he began spiraling - What if these photos we post destroy the band's image? What are people going to say when we get back home?

- And you want people who don't love you for who you are near you? - he asked but got no response.

Nace kissed Jan's exposed ankles and then used his hands to help the younger sit on his lap and look into his eyes.

- Jan...I need you to know you are not alone in this.

- I know. - Jan rested his forehead against Nace's - I'm just so tired.

- I know.

Nace knew Jan was tired mentally, he always was. Nace knows why but wouldn't dare to share it with the world. That's the one thing he just wouldn't, not even Damon would get that out of him. That was their secret.

- What if... - Jan grabbed Nace's ears and hair - What if someone tries to hurt you?

- Jan... Have you seen how I look? Most people would run away thinking I would beat them.

- Nace, but everyone knows you don't even hurt a single fly because you love animals so fucking much-

Nace shut him up with a kiss. Then Jan took control of it, making Nace incline more and more on the sofa. Nace placed his hand underneath Jan's shirt to feel his skin. Nace's warm hands filled up Jan's soul, and, when they would stop kissing each other from time to time, they would let some moans escape their lips.

- Better? - Nace asked.

- So much better.

- It's normal to have fears but guess what: I'll be for you anytime. Just like you are for me.

- Thanks. - Jan didn't dare to look at Nace in the eyes.

If he did, he would cry over his big brown eyes. How could he protect this man so important to him? That was his only wish.

But he also thought, that maybe, and just maybe, “being behind closed doors of a closet was bett-“

- Don't you dare think that. - Nace read him like a book.

- Of course not. - he finally looked at him and smiled - I was never going to let those thoughts win.

♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩

Don't ask me what are Kris and Jan's secrets because it happened behind closed doors :)

Polaroid Photos Universe | Recommended next: Ginger shots - lazy day

[a-boca-do-inferno]

you already did, part 2 (vincent mancini x reader) [request]

part 1

summary: Vincent is not a man not to admit his faults. He could be violent, stubborn, a little impulsive, too, but never prideful. At least not with the woman he loved.

warnings: angst, swearing, verbal abuse (sorta), fluff (sorta), just rly toxic stuff what can i tell ya

words: 3.3k

notes: this wasnt supposed to happen but yall cant stand just an angst oneshot 😭 cowards. (self-criticism.) and of course this is loosely based on rebel heart by first aid kit because i was listening to it while writing this. enjoy <3

Silence. 

Ever since (y/n) left, Vincent’s life seemed to have gone completely, utterly silent. Soundless were his heavy steps against the wooden floor, so contrary to the natural order of things; as was being away from the only person who ever understood him in this godforsaken world. But to anyone else, he was as bright and strong as ever. Reckless and ruthless as ever, ruling the Corleone empire with an iron fist, a cold heart and little humanity left. And he saw fit that even the last glimpse of his human side would’ve gone away with (y/n). It was as poetic as it was pathetic, and the dense sigh dancing in his lips was as soundless as one would expect from him those days. He felt suffocated. Muted. Silenced. Carrying the weight of the entire world on his shoulders, yet Vinnie was as free as man can be. 

Shamefully. 

“Dinner’s ready, sweetheart”, a quiet voice comes from the door. His aunt has a soft, inviting expression that’s always there for him, but as soon as her gaze meets his troubled one, Connie frowns slightly. “You don’t look so good.”

“I’m just tired”, he grumbles, looking back down at some documents. It’s not long before he huffs in annoyance, pushing them away and taking a deep breath. He can’t pretend, not with Auntie Connie. Vinnie closes his eyes for a second, rubbing his temples. “I’m just tired”, he repeats, his tone a little gentler now.

Connie shuts the door behind her and takes a step towards him, clasping her hands together. “Is it (y/n)?”

Vincent snorts, raising his brows in humourless amusement. “It’s that obvious, huh?”

She shrugs, taking a seat in front of him. “I won’t lie and say that I understand what it is that you see in that girl, not after the spectacle she made before leaving, but I know how much you miss her.”

Connie sounds faintly accusative to his ears, albeit her words are careful. He was well aware his family had a strong opinion on (y/n) from the beginning of their marriage, especially because she wasn’t Italian, but he never paid mind to them. It would be a cold day in hell when he’d let anyone dictate what he did with his life, no matter how unwavering his loyalty was to the Corleone household. He knew how to separate personal matters from work, always did. Perhaps that is why Vincent had been luckier than Michael as Godfather in that area; while he was ruthless, his passion could never be dialled down to serve some grand, ultimate purpose. Not with (y/n). His miserableness without her around was proof enough of that fact. 

“Yeah”, Vincent smirks, but it doesn’t reach his eyes, as his memories can’t help but show the face of his angry ex-wife yelling her lungs out at the most dangerous people he knew. He lets out a low chuckle, looking at the ceiling, “she’s a little crazy, she’s always been, but that’s what drew me to her in the first place. I can’t do peace and quiet, you know me.” He pauses, only to breathe through his nose and glance back at her, with his brows furrowed. “I think I’m going crazy myself without her, anyway.”

He doesn’t usually open up like this with anyone, but his aunt had a way about her that felt like he could lay himself bare, and not hide anything. Apart from that, it was no overstatement to call it like it is: there was a darkness growing inside him with each passing day. And he was alone because he refused to accept it sooner, he knew that much. (y/n) was not one to take ungratefulness kindly, and he admired her for it to no end, even when it meant her letting him go. Vincent knew from the start he married a woman who wouldn’t budge on what she deserved. Maybe that was what hurt him the most; to see things so clearly now. There was no way she could’ve stayed by his side, not without conditioning herself to receive but crumbs of affection.

Connie shakes her head with a little grin, getting his attention. “Then what the hell are you still doing here feeling sorry for yourself?” She nods once, speaking convictively, “go after her.”

Vincent is surprised by the suggestion, and he goes back to staring at the papers in front of him for a moment. Could he, really? The thought had never crossed his mind, funnily enough. As deep as he was in his well of self-pity, any hopefulness from his part just felt childish and petty. Because on top of it all, he understood her decision, mayhaps even supported it internally. (y/n) was worth more than anything he could offer her right now. 

And so he sighs again, leaning back in his chair. He snaps his knuckles, studying his ring, “I appreciate the advice, but I reckon (y/n)’s gonna shoot me on sight if she ever sees me again. We’re done, she told me so.”

His aunt grunts, glaring at him. “Is that any way for a Corleone to talk, nephew? I know you better than this!” She gets up and stands by his side, squeezing his shoulder in encouragement. “Listen to your heart. You’re a dead man walking without that silly girl”, she jokes, pushing him slightly.

This goddamn woman. She can see through him like no one can. Vinnie snorts quietly, rolling his eyes and nodding. “Fine, but I’m sending you my hospital bill.”

Vincent was never a man not to admit his faults. He could be violent, aggressive, stubborn, a little impulsive, too, but never prideful. And especially not with the woman he loved more than anything, but their last meeting wasn’t the friendliest of them all. The last time they spoke to each other, (y/n) sat across from him with her unresting look glued to the table while their lawyers sorted out the divorce agreement. As opposed to his cutting words when they fought, both parted ways each with half of their patrimony — which was mostly Vinnie’s —, despite her protests against putting her hands on his “dirty money”. 

In that last hearing, his soon-to-be ex-wife kept to herself as best as she could, although she did speak up whenever he couldn’t hold his tongue and would make some resentful and sarcastic remarks. The bickering was inevitable with them, but it now left a sour taste in his lips, so agonisingly different from the lighthearted nature of their banter a few months prior. Vincent experienced a sense of betrayal somehow, and his mouth was known to be working overtime when he was unhappy. He was angry then, he just couldn’t help himself. 

And he still was livid, even now; surrounded by striking sorrow and her helpless absence. Vincent was mad at her for making him feel so pathetically small, forced to remain trapped in his own insignificance, only further proving her point of his becoming of a shell of a man because of the family business. And that was all he ever did since she went away, as if the universe’s ultimate laughter at his circumstances: work, work, work. With no soft lips to come home to. With no loving eyes to watch him take off his coat and hang it purposefully on the chair, with the sole motive of trying to get a reaction from her. Vinnie often did. She’d give him one of her fiery, yet sweet stares, ordering him around like he wasn’t the vilest guy in the block. And he complied gladly, crawling into bed the next second. 

For that, Vincent was a deeply angry, wrathful man; because he had lost his opportunity at redemption. (y/n) had slipped away right before his eyes, but he was as blind as they came. Like any angry man, he only saw red. Never her. 

It was almost like nothing had changed, after all.

Tom points at him with his cigarette, pulling Vincent out of his thoughts. “You sure about this?”

“No. But I’m going insane”, he mutters in reflex, resting his hands on his hips as his uncle gives him a short nod, blowing the smoke. 

Dinner’s finished and everyone else has left the table. It was a normal Friday night as any, and he quietly hoped it would continue like this. His week hadn’t been exactly the best one now with the FBI tracking his every move, and he was about to make it even better — or worse, terribly worse — with (y/n)’s certain rejection later on. But it was a change for once, and he couldn’t stand the silence and the dullness of his routine anymore. Besides, he could use some yelling right now. Perhaps it’d make him come back to his senses a bit.

“She’s a nuisance in the business”, Tom’s voice is quiet, level-headed, and Vincent stops his glass halfway through his mouth before his uncle resumes his speech. “She can’t handle this. She’s too soft.”

Vinnie scowls immediately. “Why the hell are you telling me all this as if I didn’t know, eh?”, he snarls, making a sour face as he gulps down his drink in one go. “I fucking married the broad, for Christ’s sake.”

Tom’s face stays neutral and he reclines in his chair. “I’m just asking, Vincent. You gotta be sure about this, ‘cause you already know where she stands.” There is pause, until he adds, “what sacrifices are you willing to make to get her back?”

He meant leaving the business, of course, and Vincent’s knuckles turn white as he squeezes the edge of the table unconsciously. He shakes his head and lets out a fake laugh, his core boiling up with contempt. Vinnie wants to punch Tom, but ends up containing himself. He was getting very good at that. “I don’t even know if she’ll take me back, Uncle Tommy. Let’s be more realistic here, Jesus.”

“Cut the bullshit”, his tone becomes more serious, and Vincent tenses up. It was not everyday he saw this side of Tom. “You ain’t a boy no more, Vinnie. A Don has responsibilities. That girl makes you soft and you know it.”

There it is: the judgement. That was what he couldn’t take anymore. The constant watching his back, always waiting for the next “innocent” suggestion on how to do his job. That the world was out to get him, he knows. But now his own family, the one he swore to protect, the people he’d give his life for? That couldn’t be. He needed some fresh air, and some nice cuddling with his girl. And that’s what he’d do right now. 

Fuck that.

“I don’t gotta listen to this”, Vincent stands up abruptly, grabbing his coat and giving one last glare at his uncle. He raises his voice, widening his eyes furiously, “and I don’t wanna hear you say her name again, got that?!”

He left without another word, marching out the house with his chin up and his usual thug walk. Vinnie got into his car and drove away into the night, enjoying the breeze on his face. (y/n) had moved into her old apartment even prior to the divorce papers were ready, and thankfully he knew where that was. He stepped on the pedal and accelerated, eager to see the face he missed so much. His heart was pounding into his chest. Suddenly, his vision appeared to be clearer and something burned in the pit of his stomach, resemblant to the effect of a drug. Just the thought of his baby close again ignited him in such a way. 

Almost six months without her scent, her voice, her touch. Would she even let him in, he wondered, this late at night? All alone in her house... Or so he wanted her to be. Nevertheless, as much as it made him irate to think of her in the arms of another, Vinnie couldn’t blame her for going out with other people. On the other hand, he just couldn’t fathom the thought of having anyone other than her. Not just yet. So different from the Vincent he was just before they met. She really had left her mark on him.  

He stopped the car in front of her building in a halt. His jacket did nothing to warm him up through the cold wind hitting his face as he got out of the vehicle, shutting the door with a thud that was surely louder than necessary. Vincent took a deep breath and stomped towards her front door, clearing his throat and staring at his shoes for a moment. He adjusted his suit and his hair, brushing it backwards anxiously. Goddamn it, what would he even say? “I missed you, let’s get back together, even though you hate my guts and I can’t compromise because of my family”? He should just leave. This was a bad idea.

He’s turning around when the wooden surface simply disappears from his rear view. The door opened to reveal (y/n) with her hair tied up, staring at him with concern and faint surprise. She had her pyjamas on, like a normal person would so late at night, but his look automatically fell over her bare legs. She looked as beautiful as ever, even more so than he remembered. His heart hammered inside his chest and he tried to appear unaffected at her presence, even though it was useless. 

Noticing his intense stare, the girl cleared her throat, raising a questioning brow. “What on earth are you doing here, Vincent?”

Right, he had to speak. “I wanted to see you”, he breathes out, almost choked up, and it’s pathetic, but he’s past caring about that. Vinnie takes a step closer, uninvited, because it’s so much stronger than him at this point. “I miss you, (y/n).” His voice comes out strained, yet resolute. 

(y/n) pauses, taking in his sudden approach. “Vincent...”

“Don’t turn me away yet. I just wanna talk, okay?”, he spits in a rush, and he looks like an eager puppy, probably, but he’s also way past caring about that. This is the woman of his life. He can bear to look a little stupid in front of her. “Please, baby, you just gotta listen to me.”

His wife closes her eyes and sighs, making way for him to enter. “I’m not your baby anymore, you know?” 

Vincent grins in relief, walking past her to sit on the couch. His palms are sweating and he rubs them against his pants back and forth, rocking his body nervously. He’s got no idea what he’s supposed to answer, he’s never been the romantic type, but the words pour from his mouth anyways, “you’ll always be my baby.”

She looks unfazed by his directness, but her orbs still avoid him. “What do you wanna say that you haven’t already, Vincenzo?” (y/n) crosses her arms and takes a seat across from him, keeping her distance, and he can’t help but feel his chest tighten at this. 

“I miss you”, he repeats, blinking a few times. He’s so bad at this, but he’s got to do it. For her. “You’re my life. I can’t be without you, you know that.” She remains silent as he rambles, and he frowns despite himself, the feeling of being suffocated by the nothingness coming all over again. “Talk to me, (y/n)”, Vinnie’s being too demanding for the occasion, but he’s just so fucking tired of this. 

“I have nothing to say”, comes the noiseless murmur.

Vincent can spot the water fighting to escape her sombre look, but all he can think of is how fed up he is with these games. “Don’t you lie to me”, he growls, balling up his fists. “Don’t you fucking lie to me, sweetheart.”

“Get out of my house”, she stands up in the blink of an eye, glaring at his direction. 

He huffs and gets up only to glower right back at her, ignoring her request. “I won’t leave until we talk this through, okay?” He grabs her arm in a tight hold, mindful not to hurt her. This wasn’t how he was wishing things would go, although he should’ve known. She had left him for a reason. He tries to calm himself with a deep breath and lets go of her forearm, looking into her eyes intently, “tell me the truth, don’t you love me anymore?”

Tears stream down her cheeks, but she doesn’t break their gaze. “You know I do”, she whispers desperately, gripping at his jacket with all her force. 

This very moment has happened before, a few times. The same tension and eagerness to make things just work, swimming against the current. This was so like them; to be running towards each other when they should be running away. He touches her fingertips ghostly, caressing them in silent request. (y/n) gulps and squeezes his hand softly, resting it over her pounding chest. His whole body shivers with their closeness, and he has to try his best not to pull her into a kiss right there. He’s never been one to respect boundaries, and that was yet another proof of just how strong his love for that woman was.

“Come back home”, Vincent coos, bringing their foreheads together. His orbs are as watery as hers now, and he bites his trembling lip, waiting for her assured decline. 

“That house is not my home, Vincent”, (y/n) whimpers, still holding his palm securely. “You know I won’t ever go back to that place.”

“Damn you”, Vinnie sighs, shutting his eyes tightly. He much preferred her yelling than this again, anyday. “You know I can’t leave, honey.”

“But you want to”, she gives him a piercing stare, and their noses are touching. 

He wrapped one arm around her shoulders, their bodies flush against one another, and her hot breath made it all okay somehow. He was almost imploding with emotion. (y/n) knew him too well; just one look at him and she had the perfect words, the perfect timing, as much as he didn’t want to admit it out loud. The moblife was killing him from the inside out, and being away from her was only the last straw. When she hugged him back slowly, there was nothing but them at that moment. Everything else faded. This was real. 

“They’ll never let me go”, Vinnie considers gently, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Hell, they might even kill me for this.”

“We can run away”, (y/n) smiles, cupping his cheeks and leaving a quick kiss on his lips. He presses himself against her, devouring her mouth with no further ado. It’s been so long. All the anxiety and anger dissipated under her tender touch, and he deepened the kiss hungrily. When they pulled away, she chuckled, “someone missed me, huh?”

“Don’t joke with that, sweetheart”, he pleads, and his words come out smaller than he intended. Vincent pecks her mouth again, biting her lip weakly with a smirk. “I’m still mad you left.”

(y/n) snickers, swaying their bodies unhurriedly. “I had to.”

He lets out a quiet grunt, nuzzling her jaw, “I know.” His fingers reach her hips and he pulls her closer. “I love you.”

“I love you too”, she purrs, holding him delicately.

And then came the silence. Yet this time, it felt like he could breathe at last. In her arms, it all meant something again. Never mind his other half, (y/n) was simply his entire being. More than whole, Vincent was himself in her presence once more. They could take on the world together, and that’s what he was willing to do for them both. He had the answer for Tom’s question now. For (y/n), he’d give his life. 

Shamelessly. 

[ruvastuon]

Unconventional Gifting

@flashfictionfridayofficial

Story Warning: Mentions of burning people, sadistic behavior, and descriptions of body horror.

Much to his disgust, the air in his tent felt fresher than it had in months. How long had it been since his fingers had started to twitch again? With a renewed wave of irritation, the Sergeant stood up from his desk for the first time in days and decided it wouldn't be breaking orders if he stopped the fire from getting out of control this time. Since he was young, it had been the one thing that brought him joy. Back then, he would burn anything he could get his hands on, bugs, animals, or plants. It didn’t matter much. They all sparked a strange joy in his heart. That being said, there had always been something missing, some itch he’d never quite been able to scratch no matter how much he burned.

Then the war came, and he discovered the one thing he had failed to consider as a target: people. Unlike the other things he had burned, people tended to beg and plead. They might call him a monster, but at least he was aware enough to know that the sense of power he felt from their cries sated the desire he had been starving from. To date he had burned three-hundred and eighty-seven prisoners, with only one survivor who he would track down eventually, but the war was still young, and in what was proving to be a battle of attrition, the Sergeant could tell that he might even be able to push those numbers into the thousands.

“Is the area clear?”

His assistant exited the tent and quickly returned. There was fear in his eyes as the Sergeant stared down at him intensely. There should be several more prisoners, so the assistant wouldn’t have anything to fear unless he got on the Sergeant’s nerves.

“The troops have rounded up all the rats.”

A smile spread over his face at that. They had sent more pathetic mice to try and end him, but they were just providing him the entertainment that he craved. It was poetic in a way that he realized was probably sick.

“Well, then we can’t keep them waiting.”

Stepping out of his tent, the Sergeant felt a sharp pain in his chest and looked down to see a spot of red right above his heart that was quickly expanding. His assistant stumbled and grasped one of his eyes with a scream of pain. The Sergeant’s skin grew cold as an overwhelming sense of dread washed over him as screams of pain began emanating through their camp. His soldiers were the best. They wouldn’t have been taken out so easily, he couldn’t be taken out so easily.

Collapsing to the ground while clutching his wound, the Sergeant watched his assistant let out a final cry of agony as a green sprout began to poke out between his bloodied fingers. The Sergeant barely felt his own pain as he lay almost paralyzed on the ground, wondering how this had happened. As his vision began to grow hazy, he saw what looked like a living tree stepping towards him. He couldn’t understand what had happened, but he could feel in his bones that the thing was coming for him.

-Five-thousand eight-hundred and twelve, quite the high toll for someone so young-

The words sounded like a whisper of wind rustling through leaves. HE didn’t have time to contemplate what this creature was as a crushing pain passed through him and for the first time in his life the Sergeant began babbling incoherent pleas for his life for what felt like an eternity before his body stopped responding to his commands and he was forced to lay in frozen agony as his body was eaten from within.

…

“Hey Billy! MA was worried”

The Forest Guardian begrudgingly took his eyes off of his latest target. Owen was running towards him with a stupid grin plastered over his face like he wasn’t stepping over twisted bodies while covered in blood. This man… he needed to get his head checked.

Still, he meant well and seemed to be in functioning condition, so Billy didn't need to spare his attention just yet. With a wave of his hand, Billy dismissed his concern and turned back to the bodies with a smile of surprise. A field of violets had begun to bloom from the dead. It was well worth the three days he’d spent watching the tent through his rifle scope.

It never ceased to amaze him how people who had caused so much pain to the world always seemed to make the most beautiful flowers.

[candyskiez]

ramble abt ur favourite su characters

I HAVE BEEN FREED FROM AUTISM JAIL!!!

pearl is probably my absolute favorite. which is funny considering I used to dislike her a Lot. she was such a dickhead to steven and was very hard to like at first considering she used to be so mean. but the great thing about how she was developed is you simultaneously learn WHY she's like that while also seeing her become better. like. "gems do not experience childhood" explained so fucking much, especially with how unhealthy homeworld is revealed to be, ESPECIALLY with how horrific the treatment of pearls is revealed to be.

also just. the fucking horrible mess of emotions that is, the only reason steven is here is because rose *isn't.* and pearl had *no sense of self* outside rose. yet she couldn't get better while she and rose were in contact. there HAD to be some sort of separation for her to be able to heal and grow. pearl had to grow away from rose for a long time and be completely separate from her for a WHILE if she and rose could *ever* have a healthy relationship, if that's even possible.

pearl starting to form her own opinions is so fucking. god. it's so fucking cathartic to watch. and learning just how much of her worth she put up on being the only one rose trusted made her flipping out about the lion feel so much more Real. of course she freaked out, it was the only thing she felt like gave her worth. of course she freaked out, she used the fact rose told her things she told nobody else to make herself go "see? it wasn't all for nothing. you're not beneath her. she LOVES you."

and god the way she treats steven in season one still makes me so mad but. it makes sense. it's horrible and unacceptable, but it makes *sense.*

god. also just. the little hints of her having opinions outside of rose for so long, she just felt too guilty to show them. she felt like they were a betrayal to, she was terrified of being Too Much. she was terrified of displeasing rose and losing her looking at her like she was *worth* something. she tells rose, why would I ever want to go home if you're here. but she misses space, she risked everything to try and go to space even when it was too dangerous. she was so close to bismuth. she did have feelings outside of rose, but her world revolved around rose so much that she felt like she couldn't have them. I mean it when I say she cannot have a healthy relationship with rose. there's too much of a power imbalance and she has to be away from rose so she can grow more.

also, god. pearl finally being able to say, rose was wrong. rose was wrong to hurt you. you were hurt, badly. even if she didn't mean to, she hurt you and that was unfair of her. to volleyball? the girl who reminds her of herself when she was younger? poetic fucking cinema. it makes me feral. I love this show I love the "rose quartz isn't a monster" while also "rose and pearls relationship was deeply unhealthy and pearl cannot be with rose and heal at the same time, they have to be apart for at least a while for pearls sake." COEXISTING. this show knows what nuance is and I love it. pearl is such an excellent character and I GET HER. I love her so much. I want to kiss her forehead. a single pale rose made me cry.

(this is for me telling people to ask me for opinions/thoughts on su stuff! feel free to shoot me an ask)

[goth1clee]

Loki (he/they) x male reader (established relationship)

You are a part of the avengers, and you’ve been overworking yourself. Loki sees this and wants you to rest and look after yourself.

You sat quietly at the countertop, still groggy and forcing yourself to stay awake. It had been two days since you’d seen your partner Loki, as you had been sent on a long and arduous mission with the rest of The Avengers. As much as you loved being a part of the team and fighting along aside your friends, your heart ached whilst being apart from Loki. Despite both of you only being together a few months, you were pretty much inseparable and still struggle to be without each other’s company for more than a few days.

You swivelled around on your chair to face Loki, who was making herbal tea for the both of you. He noticed you gazing at him and shot you a flirty glance. He smirked when he saw the soft glow on your cheeks.

“Enjoying the view my love~”

He walked over to you, holding the two mugs, and he placed them carefully on coasters (god knows how many times he complained about people not using coasters).

“How’s are you feeling my love?”

You smiled; his whole personality seemed to soften around you; his tone and overall demeanour changed immediately in your presence.

“I’m doing ok hun.” You smiled, not wanting to worry them.

Loki sighed and sipped his tea. You knew that he worried about you constantly-he hated seeing you hurt no matter how serious the injury is. You saw his expression and decided to change the subject.

“I missed you Loki.”

Loki smiled as looked into your eyes, knowing you’d fold the second they made contact.

“Those two days felt like a lifetime.”

Everything he said was poetic; Loki had an amazing way with words. He looked back at you as you hid your glowing face in your hands discreetly, and smirked.

“Aww you’ve gone all shy already. We’ve only been in each other’s company for about half an hour and you’ve gone coy, my love”

“Stop it, you know what you’re doing.”

You giggled as he put his palm to his chest sarcastically in shock.

“Me? Why, Y/N, explain what it is you’re accusing me of doing?”

He grinned as you became more shy-he revelled in it. He inched his chair closer to yours, in a childish manner almost, and snaked his hands round your waist, embracing you.

“Let’s make a deal shall we darling,” he spoke softly, rubbing your back as he did so, “next time Stark sends you on a long mission, you refuse, is that ok?”

“Lohoki I can’t just say no, he’s kill me.”

Loki grinned once again as he adored hearing you laugh. They took a small sip of their tea, then turned to look at you.

“So then my love, it is probably about time that you had some rest. You’ve been busy working for far too long.”

He spoke kindly; his offer was always so tempting, however you sighed and slowly got up from your chair.

“Honestly Loki and d love to, but I’ve got some stuff I gotta finish, then I said to Steve I’d train with him-“

“Y/N,” Loki cut you off mid sentence, “please rest. You���ve been over working yourself for a while now and it’s unhealthy.”

“I know Loki, but I have to get things done, or they’ll get on top of me. I can’t be flaky.”

Loki’s eyes flickered with sadness.

“Darling nobody thinks you’re flaky, in fact you are completely the opposite. Every person in this building would be able to tell me that you’re overworking yourself.”

His words comforted you, however that didn’t fully change your opinion-you were stubborn and they knew it. Loki thought for a second, then grinned at you. He made his way over to you and hugged you from behind.

“What could I do to convince the handsome but overworked love of my life that he needs to rest? I wonder…”

Before you could protest, Loki began kneading his fingers into your hips. You desperately tried to suppress a giggle.

“Lohoki Odinson, do not start.” Your voice cracked slightly as you began to giggle-Loki knew you were more ticklish than you cared to admit, so he often used it to his advantage in situations such as this.

“Oh, using my full name? You must be serious my love. Why don’t you let loose for me hm?”

Loki picked you up and carried you to the sofa, where he threw you down and held you r arms above your head with one hand. He used his other hands to wiggle his fingers above your belly. You giggled nervously, which made him more amused.

“What’s so funny?”

“Lohoki get off me!”

“But I haven’t even touched you yet.”

“Ihi can stihill feel it though.”

“Well you going to feel it even more, riiight about….now.”

Loki dug his fingers into your hips, making you squeal and laugh harder. He enjoyed moments like this where you both were playful and childish. Considering the both of you had grown up quite fast as children and were never really given the time for playing and other acts like this, Loki always found opportunities to tease or tickle you in some way; it was one of their ways of showing affection.

Plus, as embarrassed as you were about this fact, you didn’t exactly *hate* being tickled. You struggled to even say the word without feeling uneasy and your face heating up. Loki noticed this within less that a few weeks of knowing you, and he immediately sought to find you alone and test out their theory. Of course he was right, and also pleasantly surprised.

“So my love, are you going to take some time off training and work to rest and take care of yourself?”

Loki spoke in a playful but soft tone; one that made you want to melt under his touch.

“Ihill have to check with st-EHEVE LOKI NAHH.”

Before you could try and protest, Loki had put his head on your stomach and was lightly nibbling your lower ribs and tummy.

“What a ticklish boy you are~”Loki grinned to himself as he spoke. “What was that? You’ll have to speak clearer.”

He teased you, knowing you wouldn’t be able to retaliate in this state. He fluttered his fingers over your underarms, making you cackle, much to your embarrassment.

“Oh now that’s just precious.” He cooed over you, genuinely enjoying himself.

“IHI SWEAR TO GOHOD, PISS OHOFF”

Loki gasped in sarcastic shock, “Language my love! We can’t have that can we?”

Loki moved his hands off your abdomen and his hands darted into your underarms.”

“GEHET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OUT”

Loki smirked and laughed to himself; your reaction was very entertaining.

“Well I can’t exactly move my hands can I love, you’ve clamped your arms down.”

You hesitantly loosened your arms to let him take his hands out of your armpits, but you held his hands away fro m you to avoid another rounds of ticklish attacks.

“Right then, do you swear that you’ll come relax with me for a while?”

“YEHES FINE JUST GET OHOFF ME”

“Do you swear?~ Loki lightly scribbled your tummy, making you squeal.

“IHI SWEAR”

Loki smiled and aloud you to regain your breath and some energy. As you calmed down, Loki put his arms around you and embraced you. As you hid your red, flustered face, Loki grinned mischievously.

“Oh yeah and one last thing…”

Before you had time to react, Loki hoisted your shirt up and blew a raspberry on your stomach, causing you to fall back on the sofa and scream.

“LOHOKI YOU ASS”

They smiled and ruffled your hair. As you giggled one last time, he smiled again at your expression and pulled you closer.

“Ihim sorry my love, it was too hard to resist. Now, shall we call Steve and the others to let them know of you plans?”

You nodded and curled up next to him on the sofa. The other Avengers completely understood your plans and didn’t think any less of you-all of them agreed you had overworked yourself recently and more than deserved some quality time.

“See, that wasn’t so hard was it darling?”

Loki chuckled as you frowned and snuggled closer under the blanket.

“You look utterly shattered darling~”

“Yeah well I’m bound to be a bit tired after all that aren’t I?”

“Oh Y/N, don’t act like you didn’t have a little bit of fun darling. From what I just witnessed, you don’t mind being tickled that much do you?”

“Hush”

(Been sat in my notes for agessss)

[harrowharkwife]

🚨🚨🚨 uh oh clown alert!

listen. listen to me. buck is going to win the lottery in the 6b finale "pay it forward" and then give all of it to his friends and family. possibly via anonymous "angel donation?"

and i can prove it too - spec under the cut!

these are all from 6a&6b episode transcripts. opening and closing a season with "let the games begin" and "pay it forward" can't be a coincidence! and we know hen filled out lottery tickets for everyone in the firehouse, so there's a ticket with buck's name on it that's already been played.

maddie's joked with buck twice now this season about buying lottery tickets- the second time, she told him he should play the lottery because he "got so lucky," referring to him surviving the lightning strike.

pre-lightning, we had buck telling hen in cursed that he was "having a run of bad luck" but that it would "turn around tomorrow," in reference to a non-anonymous DONATION (!!!) not going as planned.

what if the lightning, cleansing fire that it off symbolizes, basically "burned through" the rest of his bad luck, clearing the way for one helluva lucky streak?

we got the buckley diaz family joking that he might "gain more powers" as he "gets stronger." sure, math helps with poker i guess, but you know what else would help? luck.

the symbolism of buck, someone conceived for the express purpose of making a bone marrow donation he had zero say in, someone who only recently donated sperm (partially) because he felt, in his own words, like he "couldn't say no," receiving an unexpected windfall of cash, and having the freedom and the privacy to make financial donations on his own terms, of his own free will, with zero outside pressure, as opposed to making organ/tissue donations out of obligation? SO poetic.

he's not the guy who tries to fix things, anymore- he knows his own worth, and he knows he's loved, and he no longer values himself solely on what he can do for others. he doesn't think he has to earn people's love, anymore- he knows his family loves him anyway. but he'll always be buck. he'll always want to help. and there's a massive difference between helping someone just because you want to, and trying to fix everything for someone because you've convinced yourself it's what you have to do in order for them to love you back.

so: buck wins the lottery. he regifts all of it to the people in his life, quite literally paying it forward, echoing athena and hen's conversation in 911 what's your fantasy about winning the lottery and giving it all away "to people" in your community, rather than to charities. maybe some of it's anonymous, maybe some of it isn't- realistically, if everyone in the 118 suddenly gets anonymous checks in the mail, they're going to figure out it's buck eventually. but it's the spirit of the thing.

they were filming at a cruise ship dock for the finale- buck gifts bobby and athena tickets to a cruise, to replace the honeymoon cruise they missed. he probably makes a donation to bobby's AA chapter.

we know madney get in trouble with the IRS in 6x15 death and taxes, so maybe he helps them out of that jam. pays off their mortgage, helps with the renovation costs, maybe chips in towards a wedding celebration.

maybe he pays off hen's med school loans, or makes a donation to help karen's coworkers injured in the explosion, maybe a recurring monthly stipend they can use to buy fun toys for any new foster kids, something like that.

maybe he's moving in with eddie anyway, so he buys out the rest of his lease from his landlord and transfers the apartment to taylor, on the SOLE condition that she CANNOT run a news story that he's the guy who won the lottery. (i despise taylor just as much as the next girl, believe me, but megan west was on the fox lot for a hot minute, so if it ends up being for 911 and not some other show, then, well, here we are.) he did admittedly put her in a real shit situation, re: her lease and all the move-in drama. this might be a nice way of clearing the air. fucking with someone's living situation is a tremendously shitty thing to do, and i think he knows that. plus, it would make for a good parallel to abby leaving buck to housesit her place indefinitely with zero closure, and also, i just hate the loft and want it gone forever, sorry!

college fund and surfing lessons for chris, obvs.

vegas couples' trip for him and eddie.

which brings me to the connor and kameron of it all- i remember seeing a (very blurry, zero context) behind the scenes picture that looked like it MIGHT have *MAYBE*, *POSSIBLY* been buck talking to a pregnant woman in his loft. and connor's been acting real shady. and 6x13 mixed feelings had entirely too many lines about "blaming someone else for lies YOU told" re: fathers and sons. soooo... i think there's a fair chance connor could flake on kameron and leave her last-minute. he thought he wanted to be a dad, but he wasn't actually ready. or maybe he thought he'd be okay with using a sperm donor, but turns out he's not. or maybe he just liked the idea of being able to give kameron what she wanted, but he realizes it's not actually what he wants for himself. something like that. (side note: this would be SUCH a good opportunity to contrast him with buck and highlight all buck's character growth!) and he skips town- in the end, he's the one who winds up "being a father and walking away."

but buck has a chance to draw a real boundary, here! he's not this baby's dad, and he knows that. maybe kameron's ready and willing to take on being a single mom. buck already has his own family, with eddie and chris. he's not this baby's dad, because he's a dad already. but he *is* "responsible for the creation of new life," as he put it, and we heard an awful lot of talk from oliver about buck "owning his choices" and taking responsibility for them re: this plotline. so, boundaries: he's not the dad, just a friend who wants to help- he knows firsthand from eddie how hard single parenting can be, and connor taking off was a real asshole move, and kameron is a grown woman perfectly capable of raising this kid on her own, and she really wants to be a mom, but she DID get left in the lurch through no fault of her own, and that's not fair to her. so buck offers to set up a standing payment from his lottery winnings to help her cover childcare expenses and whatnot, at least while she finds her footing and tries to work some kind of formal divorce agreement out with connor, if not in perpetuity. (hell, maybe she's who he gives the loft to, not taylor!) but he helps her in some way- a sperm donation he was always sorta on the fence about, paired with a financial donation that he's certain is the right choice, and one he wants to make. standing by his past choices, honoring them, and helping nurture them.

(besides, he's saving on rent anyway, now that he's moving into the diaz house.)

maybe kameron, as a token of gratitude towards buck for helping her fulfill her dream of having a child, as a gesture of reciprocity for his assisted-reproduction donation, offers a parting quip of "well, buck, if you and your boyfriend are ever looking for a surrogate or an egg donor, you know who to call. i'd love to return the favor!" as her own way of paying it forward.

anyway, the point is this: in a season about games and money and paper trails and gambling and luck and winning and lottery tickets, i'd bet good money that we're gonna see buck win the lottery this season. how he'll actually wind up spending the money is just a guess on my part, but the actual lottery bit itself? that much i'm sure of!