#it’s not a direct correlation but u understand

[kaitcake1289]

the fact that mythic quest went from an episode that was literally about a writer fearing that one day AI would be able to replace him and that that day was today and the ending of that ep was him smashing the fuck out of that air conditioner to condoning crypto bullshit will never fail to disappoint me

[aquaquadrant]

Thinking about how there are really toxic people in the real world and wondering how hellsification works. Is it an inversion of how awful you are in the real world or a direct correlation. Do the awful people in the world have the worst or best (still turned bad but only by their awful situation) people in hells as counterparts, or is it random?

I have brainrot in both directions and mood to know

that’s kind of a tricky question to answer, bc it’s different for every player. the intent was that a hels would represent the worst parts of an overworld player, but it’s not always so black and white. it’s not so much random as it’s a direct result of whatever traits were amplified or twisted in the hels- but that can lead to a wide range of results, so as u look from player to player it can feel kinda random.

u can have a good overworlder with a worse hels (pretty common), or a bad overworlder with a better hels (ie. tango and bravo). u could also have a bad overworlder with an even worse hels. or both counterparts being more or less the same in terms of morality. like, timmy isn’t necessarily more of a ‘bad person’ than jimmy- he doesn’t have any greater capacity for cruelty, his trait just means he’s more helpless.

so there’s virtually endless possibilities! which unfortunately makes it difficult to quantify. but hopefully that makes sense? no one in the fic really understands how it all works so u guys as the audience don’t have all the info either, sorry bout that… 😂

[briefcasejuice]

Hi! :D I’m avoiding course work and I’m just genuinely curious.

Now it’s been a while since I’ve been into comics/superheroes but when I first followed you I remember you enjoyed the Netflix Defenders series, more specifically DD. Can I ask why u don’t as much anymore?

that's so real of you

the more i got into the comics the more i realised how very much sucks the route they took in the dd show upheld a lot of ableist, racist and white christian (the distinction of them using catholicism over any other branch of christianity is important to my establishing of the choice's explicit whiteness (but specifically in correlation to the concept of white supremacy)) beliefs which kind of acted in direct opposition to matt murdock's original characterisation. there's also a fundamental misunderstanding of the comics in general and how each run related to each other and what they meant for the title as a whole and this misunderstanding definitely negatively affected the show's plot and how it went about establishing and developing relationships. then, the fanbase is even worse; it not only upholds but also adds onto and perpetuates the heteronormative and ableist aspects of the tv show by infantalising and dehumanising matt murdock but at the same time, carnally desiring the seeing man that plays him while willingly ignoring what the racism and changing of many aspects of matt's core beliefs to be directly aligned with catholicism means about the messages the writers and directors wanted the show to portray. at first, it's just petty annoyances here and there but looking at the root causes of fandom discourses is kind of stomach turning; these fandom discourses worsen because when you think about it, putting ableist and heteronormative people who are fixated on a catholic character in one, very small and echo-y space breeds the worst fandom habits i've ever experienced -- who would have guessed? there's a very specific kind of ego attributed to the fanbase that's akin to that of mcu twitter bros in which they refuse to read the source material and when you look for any kind of reasoning for this, it jumps right out at you: reading the comics in which matt murdock's personality isn't propped on these harmful, very christian and white societal ideals means explicitly confronting their own morals, especially when it comes to humanising disabled people (which they can never do because in the end, they were attracted to charlie cox and not matt murdock specifically) and even perhaps entirely discarding the idea of enjoying/understanding a character they're either not attracted to or one they are, but they feel they shouldn't be attracted to.

also i'm just very hyperfixated on mike murdock and have been for almost two years straight.

[nahalism]

Also do you do shadow work? If so how do you do

hey i do. the main things i did/do are fast, meditate, and do targeted work on areas i hold a lot of trauma or stiffness in by doing intense stretching and breathwork. aside from resolving trauma the main aim is so bring awareness to the fullness of what my 'self' is so i can acknowledge all parts of me, the favourable and not favourable.

1) the fasting is mostly to cleanse my body and gain mental clarity. i find that it heightens my awareness of how everything i consume impacts me, so it helps in the process of being aware of whats going on within me internally, but also how that internal processing correlates to whats happening and has happened to me externally. without that step it can be challenging to access and decide the direction to go in

2) next is energy purification. imo, the body is made up of so many things other than just the physical flesh blood & bones. fasting helps with mental and physical restoration, but stretching, meditating, brought everything that made me uncomfortable or was stiff in my body to the surface. so id stretch and hold the stretches whilst doing deep breath work to identify where the energetic blockages were in my body, and what their emotional root was. then id sit with that emotion or experience in meditation till the emotion neutralised (not till i could avoid it or suppress it, more like crying & rocking myself through it till i can feel it and not feel heavy or triggered by it). just to be transparent sometimes i could do that in a sitting but theres times it took months or years for the cycles of that healing to play out. im still working on stuff

3) apart from the things mentioned above i did a lot of going into nature with the purpose of meeting myself and understanding my subconscious. i dont recommend this cause it can be dangerous esp for girls, but going to the forest when it gets dark / winter helped because its naturally frightening and dark so the subconscious runs riot and reveals a lot/triggers a lot. i also would induce anxiety attacks and various other things sometimes w weed and other natural substances so i could reveal more of my psyche to myself and learn to self soothe.

4) i also did other things related to my esoteric / theological study. i tapped into god as much as i knew how, & used prayer, tools like tarot, numerology, ritual, etc etc to guide me

i don't necessarily recommend doing all the things i did without having a plan of what to do if it takes u somewhere dark. i did these things cause i felt intuitively called to as a solution to the things i was facing. it did scare me to do some of them, cause the things they brought up for me were uncomfortable, however i never felt out of my depth so use that as a guideline.

if u need more help/advice feel free to msg me, look thru my ask tag (i've answered q's like this before) or look at the video & google doc i made on the meditation process (how to tune into and identify energetic and emotional trauma in the body) <33333 good luck

[wizardnuke]

im talking about the essay grade again and i got off topic and started talking about the lit analysis potential inthe vast majority of fanfictionbjust. Ignore

i feel like it's such a humblebrag for me to be like "i don't understand how i continually get really good grades in english" because i understand objectively that 1) i am very good at analysis and/or. finding quotes to support whatever the fuck thesis i decided would be easy to support (see: "good at analysis") (i think i honestly just randomly hit the jackpot on "good thesis" but on god i just looked at macbeth and gawain respectively and was like Ah. Women's Wrongs. Easy Peasy) and 2) i know from looking at other people's essays that i am just kind of. marginally-to-a-lot better at grammar and phrasing/understand the very specific madlibs-style layout i have to use and what vocabulary that i need to be putting out. it's madlibs. there's a really technical and specific layout that needs to be followed and i just kind of follow it. it's not hard. it is boring. if i could write academic papers on the shit i'm actually interested in they'd be worthless because it's niche and/or wild tumblr user conjecture. anyone who seriously writes on. hold on i need to generate a thesis. "the cyclic nature of abuse and its direct correlation to homoeroticism in cn's supernatural" could u fucking imagine. that's hilarious. that's some hackjob shit no matter how well i could keep a straight face on the matter because all that people care about is Old Shit. i have no real vested interest in actual literary works beyond "they're important and better than people think". i have extremely strong feelings on a lot of modern works, generally movies and shows and niche dnd webshows, i cannot make a career in that shit, my english prof thinks fanfic is bullshit and i see where he's coming from! i don't think it's bullshit. but. the academic perspective on fanfiction is like "they're not making original work" because the setting/adjacent themes and characters r lifted from another work and there's no real originality in it except that the best fics i've read are like.. an alternate form of literary analysis that is so far from actual essay writing that it's unrecognizable. but people can see the themes and the motifs and rehash them in a way that is absolutely a kind of analysis of the original work, but with flourishes and new ideas and batshit choices that the og media either couldn't make/didn't feel like making/tentacle sex wasn't really thematically fitting but an author decided "hey what if i put themes into this consentacles fic" and like, i want to argue that that's legit. sometimes. but i am not going to do that bc i sound objectively insane and also sometimes it is just not that deep and that will be brought up as an argument and i just don't care enough to explain that it's still an art form even if it's not that deep. is "fun and funky fresh" not a common motivator. if "new interpretations" of works like shakespeare and shit where they plunk the characters into a modern setting and fuck with the phrasing is seen as a viable art form/type of analysis then fanfic is an art form/analysis adjacent to that. not all of it though. some of it is something else that is worse. not that i think that is in itself bad. fanfic is a hobby. can't make a career out of that. but people have made careers out of that by changing the names and setting and publishing books. and that's viable apparently. i just personally am insane and enjoy writing very serious and/or emotionally driven meta on dnd shows. i like themes and motifs and i think that while a quickly written meta post on the tragedy inherent in redemption arcs that hit 50k is absolutely not as academically sound as a cited paper on a similar subject, there's Something To It and there's got to be some kind of potential in it. i like stories. idk if i could make a living out of talking about stories especially from the insane angle that i tend to hit stories at. the possibility of making it a genuine career is driven down below ground after i take into consideration my insanity about modern stories vs my neutrality on older ones. what am i talking abt. bf is yelling for me bye

[hendolish]

back again w the high school/uni prompts!!

hendolish helping the other understand an academic concept and being so proud of them when they get it!! and then sitting together in silence working but still touching elbows or knees and feeling the comfort of the others presence since they don’t get to spend a lot of time together at school with different schedules!!

love u sm! <3

also for @lfcgirl23 !! (prompts were so similar i decided to mush them together <3)

jack grealish/jordan henderson | study date ♡

“… you still don’t get it, do you?”

Jordan asks through a long-suffering sigh as Jack stares over at him with wide brown eyes.

“Gimme a sec, I’m thinking.”

The other placates as Jordan shakes his head and picks up his notes, already preparing to explain it to Jack all over again. At least his thinking face is cute.

“Yeah I still don’t get it.”

Jack relents finally after a few seconds more of silence and gormless staring. They’re pretty much the only ones left in the library on campus by now, so they’re not trying too hard to be quiet.

“Okay,” Jordan still finds himself speaking softly all the same, “Let’s try this a different way, yeah? You know what a mnemonic is?”

“…a disease?”

Jack answers so quickly it makes Jordan laugh, although the fact that Jack’s grinning brightly at him as well gives him hope that he’s joking, “Nah, don’t they shorten things to help you remember them and that?”

Jordan nods at him, somehow proud.

“Like, ‘Never Ever Support West Ham.’”

Quirking his eyebrow at him in question, Jack wheels his chair closer towards Jordan’s, smug he knows something he doesn’t.

“North, East, South, West,” He reels off as he points in the correlating direction, sounding proud of himself, “My old man taught me that one.”

“Right,” Jordan laughs, enjoying their knees knocking together where they’re now sitting so close, “Sound advice that.”

Jack grins at him, white teeth a contrast to his dark stubble, and Jordan can’t help squeezing his thigh before making sure they get back on track.

“Okay, so how about we come up with one for the carpal bones? Then it might help with your recall.”

Both their degrees include elements of sports medicine, for which it’s crucial to remember all the bones in the human body and where they are. The only problem is that there’s 206 of them, so Jordan doesn’t really blame Jack for struggling to recall them.

Jack agrees with a nod before they’re consulting the textbook, noting down the letters they need to use, and soon bouncing ideas off of each other to make the mnemonic as memorable as possible.

“I’ve got it!”

The younger declares after about five minutes of deliberation with a proud smile; Jordan is very aware of the fact that what they’re currently engaging in could also be described as procrastination, but he reasons that as it’s in attempt to help Jack, it’s acceptable.

“Hit me.”

Jordan tells him as he sets down his pen. He’d only gotten halfway through his own invention.

“‘Some Lovers Try Positions That They Can’t Handle.’”

Laughter bubbles out of him before he can stop it, half-induced by the knowing grin Jack’s giving him, but when he consults his list of letters, he’s pleasantly surprised to find that the mnemonic actually works.

“Hope you’re not talking about anyone in particular.”

Jordan teases as he eyes Jack and draws the textbook away from him. The younger just shrugs and answers, “Well, we’ll have to see, won’t we?”

Shaking his head, Jordan locates a diagram of the hand and twists it around to show Jack.

“So, we start with the big bone here and then do the same on the row above to name them, yeah?” Jack nods and leans in closer to analyse, “Okay. Can you tell me which carpal bone this is?”

When watching the younger’s brow furrow, Jordan urges him to remember his mnemonic. Jordan certainly hasn’t forgotten it yet so he doubts that Jack will have.

He’s pointing to the third bone in the second row, and can visibly see as Jack counts along the bones in his head and recites his phrase.

“Well… that’s ‘Can’t’, so it has to be the Capitate?”

A rush of excitement bursts through Jordan’s body as Jack gets the answer correct. He implores his expression not to waiver, however, until he checks, “And the one before it?”

“Uh, the Trapezoid?”

Jordan can’t help himself now as he springs out of his chair and points at another, “And this one?”

“Scaphoid?”

Finally emitting a triumphant laugh to himself, Jordan barely holds himself back from doing victory laps of the library’s second floor.

“Why’d you sound so unsure?” He asks a wide-eyed Jack as he grips both of his shoulders and shakes him, “You’re getting them right!”

It takes a moment for it to sink in for the younger.

“I’m— really?”

It should be amusing, how surprised Jack sounds and how little faith he’d apparently had in himself, but for now Jordan is just really, really proud of him.

“Yep,” He tells him as he grins down at him before sneaking a brief kiss to his lips. They doesn’t really show affection in public but Jordan thinks this calls for a special occasion, “Now… d’you want the good news or the bad?”

Jack raises his eyebrows at him then, although his reaction was delayed from where his eyes were still trailing after Jordan’s receding lips.

“The good news is that I can finally sleep soundly tonight knowing you won’t completely fail your exam.”

The younger waits a second before asking hesitantly, “And the bad..?”

“We’ve got 198 more bones to go.”

♡

[finniestoncrane]

Hello, I don’t know how many asks I’ve sent you so if it’s a lot I’m sorry I just love your content 😭

Could we may haps have the riddlers with a reader who has a fair amount of tattoos, and what they think of them? Also their reaction to seeing a little “?” Tattoo somewhere on them? If it’s too much I totally understand. 👍🏼

Riddler Headcanons: Tattooed Reader

Riddlers x GN!Tattooed!Reader absolutely omg i keep threatening to get a question mark tramp stamp and i can't tell if my husband is on board but i know eddie would be u-u and PLEASE that's not too much at all, never too much, bless you for sending me things 💚 request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi minors DNI!! 🔞 cw for nsfw stuff: bodies and sex and kinks etc.

gotham

he's kind of put off at first, because he's an idiot. he's got himself confused about the worth of someone in direct correlation to how spoiled they might be, so piercings and tattoos aren't things he thought he was interested in. but watching you work and seeing the ink twist and change shape as your arms move really does it for him. wait until he sees how the ones on your back move too... if he spotted a little question mark tattoo on you, it would definitely seal his attraction. it's a mark of faith in his ability to truly embody the riddler.

dano

he's into it, like hardcore. he has a definite marking kink, and tattoos and piercings kind of do it for him in that sense. a permanent sign on your skin? great. you'd be totally up for biting each other and getting the tooth marks tattooed? look pop off bestie, i love that for you both. seeing your body covered in tattoos, bite marks, hickeys and his finger imprints would drive him wild you better believe this lil baddy is getting matching tattoos of his little logo with you. his is going on his bicep so he looks tough when he flexes, yours is going on your lower back or neck so he can always see it from his favourite position

unburied

oh you have tattoos? he has one, bet it's cooler *proceeds to lift up his little sweatshirt to show you the worst stick and poke question mark you've ever seen* but when you reveal your copious artworks, he's too busy trying to keep his mouth from dropping open to even be jealous. so pretty, so artistic, so hot? even if you got the question mark before you knew him for entirely unrelated reasons, he is 100% convincing himself that it's a sign of your unwavering adoration of him, that you worship him, pain in the ass

arkham

ok so his thing? tank tops. arms out, muscles greasy and sweaty. add to that the idea of the arms being covered in tattoos? hng. you'd really have him acting up. he's never got one himself, worried about the pain oddly enough. needles stress him out (thanks jon) and so he's avoided them. but getting to look at them on someone else? perfection a little question mark tattoo in honour of him? the ego boost he didn't need. get ready to have him force you to display it to everyone and anyone, regardless of the placement

telltale

tattoos are very meh. and you'd be wise to remember that too much of a good thing can be bad, or at least look bad. and no he's not still staring, it's just distracting is all, and not in a good way. no. no. as though he wasn't already unavoidably aware of your daddy issues, you're going to reveal that you're covered in ink. and how many colours has your hair been? ok that one, the little question mark? you got it for him? oh you really shouldn't have. but don't worry, he's always wanted to experiment with lasers

young justice

it's debatable that a super cool hottie with tattoos would ever talk to him, but if you did he'd be so flustered, stammering and sweating omg. get ready for a million questions too! did it hurt? what does this one mean? where else do you have them? how many do you have? do you think i'm cool enough to get one? god his little face would light up if you got a little question mark tattoo for him! blushing, speechless, unable to get out much more than a squeaky "that's cool"

capullo

he knew you had a thing for pain, and now he's questioning if you were turned on the whole time you were getting the tattoos done. would you get a tattoo of him on you? he'd like that, it would be hot. wait you should get some of those hot pin up ones too so he has something to look at while he's banging you! no WAIT you should get... that question mark tattoo is something he has specifically requested and the first time he sees it completely healed he is licking it, kissing it, biting it, sucking it. so you better have picked a good place

[perpetual-fool]

-

My 'creative reinterpretation' strategy is largely working. Initially it was like "they're not upset that I had this feeling, they're upset that I acted on it". That evolved into "it's not that I did the thing, it's that I did it without asking". Then I hit a wall and it evolved into reinterpreting their intent. "Why would they be upset but also refuse to tell me what I did wrong? because they're trying to manipulate instead of communicate." I've learned that I've been conditioned to feel bad about virtually every part of my being individually, so I've had to address a bunch of tiny issues rather than sweeping broad ones. And the fact that it's universally about everything means nothing in particular stood out, which is why I haven't realized sooner. It's sort of just the background radiation of my life. Also, I really am not cognizant of what I feel bad about. My conscious experience is that it skips straight to the end, so I've been having to: guess what the problem is, hypothesize scenario which might've caused it, reinterpret that hypothetical, and then if I'm right then I suddenly feel better. Or if I'm wrong I have to start over.

Current problem, I'm stuck on the idea that seeking connection/understanding is bad because it leads to bad outcomes. And the reasoning on that is pretty rock solid, so I don't know what I can do with that. It also correlates with the idea that the purpose of depression is to conserve energy. If nothing you can do is going to help you survive, then your best strategy is to do nothing, save your energy, and wait for circumstances to change. So that all makes sense.

I don't know what sort of satisfaction could even arise. Like, I think I've worked out the reason I spend so much time trying to 'solve' things is connection. But this is usually along the lines of "why does X exist?" or "why do people like X?". And for instance, last night I concluded that the reason people like the MP7 but dislike the P90 (and 5.7x28mm) is mainly because they can't buy an MP7. And that brought me no happiness. Concluding others are wrong is not connecting. And ya' know, I've tried just talking to people so many times, they hate that. The direct path to what I want is a dead end. And what I want may not exist at all.

Ostensibly I'm working on a couple things. I'm practicing singing, currently trying to get used to in and increase my range. I can kind of do C2-E4, and it's exhausting muscles in my back I didn't know I had. Related, I've chosen what vowels I want for my hypothetical conlang; [a] [e] [i] [o] [u] and [ə]. Also apparently the way IPA categorizes vowels is wrong (https://www.englishspeechservices.com/blog/the-vowel-space/). And I've done some worldbuilding for my hypothetical shooter game regarding which types of guns should exist. I like the idea of different factions optimizing for different factors (e.g. weight, price, performance) as different 'correct' answers to the problem. And I've been pondering the idea of a mega-dungeon. Awhile back I saw a ALTTP entrance randomizer that ended up with a lot of the dungeons weaving together in a big mess, and I liked the idea of a dungeon big enough to get lost in. Except actually getting lost is not fun but if the path were straightforward it would be tedious, so how do you make complexity interesting but not overwhelming? I dunno.

Anyway. What good is there to be had?

[hypemarketer]

Unlocking Business Success: How to Use Data Analytics to Drive Better Insights

In today’s data-driven world, information is power, and businesses have access to vast amounts of data. However, data alone is not enough; it’s the insights derived from this data that can truly drive better decision-making and fuel business success. Enter data analytics, a powerful tool that enables organizations to extract valuable patterns, trends, and correlations from their data. In this blog, we’ll explore how businesses can leverage data analytics to gain deeper insights and make more informed and strategic decisions.

Define Clear Objectives

Before diving into data analysis, it’s essential to have clear objectives in mind. What specific questions do you want to answer or problems do you want to solve? Defining your goals will help you focus your efforts and ensure that the data analysis is targeted and relevant.

Start by identifying key performance indicators (KPIs) that align with your business objectives. Whether it’s improving customer retention, optimizing marketing campaigns, or streamlining operations, having well-defined objectives will guide your data analytics efforts in the right direction.

Gather and Cleanse Data

To derive meaningful insights, you need accurate and reliable data. Ensure that you collect relevant data from various sources, such as CRM systems, website analytics, social media platforms, and transaction records. Remember, the quality of your insights is only as good as the data you analyze.

Data cleansing is a crucial step in the process. Eliminate duplicates, correct errors, and address missing or inconsistent data. High-quality data will lead to more accurate and trustworthy insights, enabling better decision-making.

Choose the Right Analytics Tools

Selecting the appropriate data analytics tools is vital to the success of your analysis. Depending on the complexity of your data and your team’s expertise, you can opt for simple spreadsheet tools like Microsoft Excel or more advanced analytics platforms like Tableau, Power BI, or Google Analytics.

Machine learning and AI-powered analytics tools are becoming increasingly popular, as they can uncover hidden patterns and predict future trends with higher accuracy. Evaluate your organization’s needs and resources to determine the best fit for your data analytics endeavors.

Data Visualization for Clarity

Raw data can be overwhelming and difficult to interpret. Data visualization is a powerful technique to present complex information in a clear and intuitive manner. Charts, graphs, and dashboards enable you to quickly grasp trends, patterns, and outliers within the data.

Visualizations not only aid in understanding the data but also facilitate communication among teams and stakeholders. When everyone can easily interpret the insights, collaboration becomes more effective, leading to better-informed decision-making.

Analyze and Interpret

With your data prepared and visualized, it’s time to conduct the analysis. There are various types of data analysis, including descriptive, diagnostic, predictive, and prescriptive analytics.

Descriptive analytics provides a historical overview, diagnostic analytics helps identify the reasons behind past outcomes, predictive analytics forecasts future trends, and prescriptive analytics offers insights on the best course of action to achieve desired outcomes.

By combining these different types of analysis, businesses can gain a comprehensive understanding of their operations and customer behavior, which informs smarter strategies and actions.

Implement Data-Driven Decision Making

The true value of data analytics lies in its ability to influence decision-making. Use the insights gained to optimize business processes, tailor marketing strategies, enhance customer experiences, and identify new opportunities for growth.

Encourage a data-driven culture within your organization by sharing insights across teams, conducting regular data reviews, and using data as a foundation for discussions and planning. When data becomes an integral part of decision-making processes, businesses can adapt faster to changing market conditions and stay ahead of the competition.

Conclusion

Data analytics is not just a buzzword; it’s a game-changer for businesses looking to gain a competitive edge and drive better insights. By defining clear objectives, gathering and cleansing data, choosing the right analytics tools, utilizing data visualization, conducting comprehensive analysis, and implementing data-driven decision-making, organizations can unlock the full potential of their data. Embrace the power of data analytics and witness your business thrive in today’s data-powered world.

[willbeskinie]

CBT for crippling med resistant ADHD: recognize when your body is hungry! eat healthy! understanding your cravings bc there is a direct correlation between healthy diet and focus! also if u forget to eat u won’t get shit done lol

me being a perfectionist trying to get into med school with med resistant adhd: ok i need to eat this specific thing that happens to be high calorie and high sugar to self medicate so i can focus and grind this shit out

my eating disorder: who needs to do homework when u can be skinny? NO STOP WHAT ARE U DOING FUCK MED SCHOOL

it’s a never ending cycle please help

[myfeeds]

Better understanding soft material behavior

The new metric is poised to help bring advances to various materials engineering challenges — ranging from the formulation of better 3D printing inks, the construction of wearable flexible electronics and sensors, the accurate printing of biomedical implants, to helping control landslides and avalanches, and even improving the textures of processed foods and personal care products, the researchers said. A team of chemical engineers from the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign has made many advances in understanding how soft materials fail — or yield — to force. However, connecting the team’s larger-scale observations to what is happening at the microscale level has remained elusive. In the study, researchers at U. of I., collaborating with teams at Argonne National Laboratory, Johns Hopkins University and the University of Ottawa, explain this relationship with a new metric they call a “correlation ratio.” The findings are published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. The team used a high-powered microscopy technique — called rheo- X-ray photon correlation spectroscopy — to study flow-dependent structure-property relationships and soft materials in real time. Rheo-XPCS is one of the few techniques that allow researchers to perform X-ray analysis of a material as it is being deformed, while simultaneously measuring it using rheometers — devices that measure stress and strain — directly in line with an X-ray beam, the researchers said. “From a materials science perspective, we have not been able to distinguish when a material changes from behaving like a solid to a liquid at the microstructural scale,” said Illinois chemical and biomolecular engineering professor Simon Rogers, who led the project. “The Rheo-XPCS at Argonne National Lab gives us an unprecedented peek at the microscale behavior of soft materials yielding to stress.” In the lab, the team worked with a material called soft colloidal glass, which is a disordered system of nanoparticles made of silica. “We call it a soft material because the interparticle interactions cause it to be sort of squishy — like having a bunch of water balloons pushed together to form a material,” said Gavin Donley, the first author of the study and former Illinois graduate student now at Georgetown University. “We used this specific material because it provides a strong X-ray signal that we can record while we perform simultaneous macroscopic measurements.” This technique allowed the researchers to finally witness the direct connection between microscopic displacements and macroscopic behavior, allowing them to define the behavior using mathematical terms. “Getting down to the nuts and bolts of this problem is a step forward so that future researchers that want to design new soft materials can do so by tweaking various microscale parameters to get a desired macroscale property,” Donely said. “We’re not quite there yet, but we have shown a clearly-defined mathematical correlation between the micro- and macroscale.” The Department of Energy, the National Science Foundation and the Natural Sciences and Engineering Research Council of Canada supported the research.

[hanna-symphony]

I've come across this about the brain ( regards children's development) and it puts a post I wrote regards trauma and how the brain works and wat ptsd is .. And the need to connect to those neuron triggers and repeat but taking dif step in conscious awarness, is to change the outcome... instead of fearing a repeat as illness and failure ( something that doesn't even exist, cause failure is actually u learning and Developing and expanding g your neuron pathways.

So I'll just paste this from perception of child development and I'll add the detailed ptsd related post in comments. I hope it helps put ppls minds at rest and stops the attack of self for our natural processing of experiance ,and us re-mapping our brains from the experience take a this trigger/repeat process.

Much love

Young children repeat the same thing over and over and over (like the same joke, the same observation, reading the same book, playing the same game...) because they are strengthening the connections in their brain that are learning from that repeated experience!

In addition to whatever they're learning from the experience they're repeating, they also learn valuable information about how to predict what's going to happen next, and how changing small variables affects the outcome.

Here are some examples of what a toddler or preschooler might be picking up from a repeated experience:

From your point of view, you're just reading the same book over and over and over -- but from their point of view, they spend 10 days thinking about the story of the book, then 8 days noticing small details in the illustrations of the background of the book, then 5 days thinking about the way that your voice sounds when you read dialogue versus when you're reading narration, then 10 days thinking about the emotions throughout the book, then 5 days thinking about the colors used in the pictures and how dark colors correlate with the "sad" pages and light colors correlate with the "happy" pages...

From your point of view, your preschooler just keeps telling the same knock-knock joke (that they don't even understand) over and over -- but from their point of view, they're spending time understanding the social reciprocity -- the back-and-forth -- of how a joke works, and then they're exploring who in their life does and does not know how to respond to a knock-knock joke (peers might not have been exposed to it, but adults probably have), and then they're chasing the delightful rush of telling someone something that makes them laugh and delight in you a little bit, and then they're expanding and exploring what words can be swapped in and out of a knock-knock joke to make people laugh even more...

From your point of view, your child gravitates toward running water in the sink as often as possible. From their point of view, one time they might be thinking about the feeling of the water running over their hands, and another time they might be listening to the sound of the water running, and another time they might be watching the visual of the water and how it cascades over any object it touches, and then they might be thinking about the temperature of the water, and then they might be thinking about the results of touching the water -- how now their hands are cold and wet and the cause-and-effect that went into that...and then they might start branching out in their experiments with how the water runs over spoons or cups in the sink, or how the water drips slowly or gushes depending on how they've opened the faucet...

There are a million million things to learn from repeated experiences. Especially when you are very young!

[Image description: An image showing what neuronal connections look like, represented by a large gray blob-like structure with many synapses -- which are thin grey branches going in all directions, connecting to other neurons. There are some of them lit up orange/white to indicate that a neuronal impulse (a thought, an action) is moving through that neuron at that time. The whole effect is a spiderweb of connections going every which way.

Words are written over the image. The words read, "Why do preschoolers love repetition? Each of their brain cells can have 15,000 connections (or synapses) to other brain cells. How do they strengthen those neural pathways? By using them."

[nahalism]

wanted to check in on u and ask how are u 💌

also, i would like to ask how u navigate "surrendering" as an act of growth and change, especially for those challenging times where u may be reminded of weights from the past haunting u and making it hard to forgive, love, and believe in yourself. i always find healing and wisdom in the notes and thoughts u share, so i also give thanks for your presence and existence ♡

this is incredibly lovely, i appreciate the kind words <3 im blessed, ive really been enjoying taking the bitter with the sweet recently. hby??

i rly hope this doesnt sound rude, but i try to answer these as honestly as possible. imo, surrender as an act of growth and change is a contradiction. surrender is surrender, not for the sake of growth or change, but for the sake of itself. going into surrender with expectation of an outcome is almost the opposite of surrendering, because its a means to passively impose ones will, rather than allow oneself to be subjected to the will of whichever force they've chosen surrender too. navigating surrender is as simple and as difficult as letting go. let that which is, be as it is, and you, as you are, be, as you are. practising that leads to growth and change for so many reasons that im sure you'll see for yourself

as for the later part, the timing of those feelings arising may be in direct correlation to your choice to surrender. sometimes when we submit to the point of surrender, what were really asking for is to see a bigger picture, or step out of the way enough to allow for some kind of divine intervention to take place. what usually happens, is that the ego, the very thing that makes surrender appear more difficult than it is, begins to resist. whatever feelings and thoughts arise, whether anger, impatience, frustration, disappointment, self deprecation, they're only mirrors that show you where your attachment and identification to the external is most deeply rooted. so the uncomfortable feelings end up being the answer to what surrender is showing you because theyre the markers of where we need guidance the most.

not i, nor any other person but you can validate you. i can't tell you why you should let go of the past, love your self, or believe in yourself. i can tell you why i think you should, but not why you should. ygm? that said, my most sincere advice is not just to surrender, but to surrender those feelings, and if you are spiritually inclined, to pray/call on your highest self or the most high to show you the situation as they would have you see it. give thanks for their continued support in your inner inquisition, and for their guidance as you continue to surrender deeper. then give thanks for resolution of the situation. (i also think its prudent not to lean on the understanding of others during times of fast, spiritual cleansing or surrender, particularly cause ur trying to reason and understand within yourself, cause asking others can muddy the water but ill leave that to your discretion)

surrender its a process with no end, so dont be discouraged!! watching resistance and difficulty arise as you try to surrender IS the lesson for a long time. but trust, ur surrendering already whether ur aware of it or not, because surrender is really its the only way to be.

sending u love

[chimaerra]

if u haven’t been heavily invested in a shitty cw show at some point u haven’t been seasoned enough

[catastrophe-at-sixteen]

strawberries and cigarettes (m)

Jungkook x reader

“For a biology project, you and your class are going on a field trip to collect evidence for your hypothesis. It is all going well until the dark haired nuisance called Jeon Jungkook decides to piss you off.”

Also - a nerd. The resident bad boy. The police. Annoying friends. A loose psycho killer. What could go wrong?

This is my first time ever uploading any fics !! im super nervous haha - i'll probably post a little of each one and see how it goes !!

Jungkook x reader.

This is your classic enemies to lovers but with a slight little twist!

This is set in the 80s/90s and is your typical bad boy/nerd girl trope- but , there is a killer on the loose. I mean this is kind of based on jack the ripper (serial killer) and my teenage fantasies of falling for bad boy jungkook. I hope you’ll give it a go and tell me what you think !!! <3

Tw : cursing, killings, descriptions of death and psychopaths, masturbation , making out, smut.

WC : 11K

also a big massive thank you to @ggukkiereads for helping me gain the confidence to write and dedicate time to finishing this ! ik its been a while since we spoke but much love to u angel <3 may u always have the best !

Begrudgingly the students lag off the bus at 10pm, finally having reached their destination.

Tired and sore from their journey the teachers find no trouble in distributing bedrooms for everyone.

When your name is called out along with Tiffany you internally groan - great you think one of the most plastic girls in the school all to myself.

You grimace but make no argument as you could have gotten worse you suppose.

As you grab your belongings and ignore her protests that she doesn't want to room with a loser like you, a dark clad figure pushes past you, almost tripping you over.

Angrily you shout

"Watch where you're going you prick"!

Yet he doesn't so much look in your direction.

Under the dim moonlight you can faintly make out the low blunt of a cigarette in a tattoo clad hand - so it was the infamous Jungkook.

Honestly you didn't understand why all the girls fawned over him when he was just a rude and ignorant asshole. Sure, he had a pretty face but no good soul to match.

Calming yourself, as it was unlikely that you'd ever receive an apology from the school rebel you just head to your new room.

The school had organised a biology trip so that you could gather authentic evidence on the correlation of birds and wood growth in a certain designated area and honestly you were excited- not having enough expenses to get out of town when you were younger meant that this was a treat for you and paired with you being a biology major your inner geek was surfacing pretty quickly.

You move into your room and begin unpacking your things ignoring the chatter coming from your new roommates.

You set everything nicely, precisely -just to your liking. Maybe some would call you fussy, but you like to think of yourself as organised and classy.

You don’t have many thoughts that night as you lay down for bed, but you do hear the news playing in the background.

" a killing has not been sighted for a time breaking the pattern of the 1-week intervals in which they have been happening, but police still advise to remain on high alert at all times. "

You shudder as you think about it, a killer on the loose in the country and everyone powerless to stop him.

He fed of the insecurities of people, the fear of not being safe. He did a damn well good job at it as well.

You look outside and see the police on night duty setting up, the country while terrified also was reluctant to admit the threat and instead of protecting you properly they had merely sent police force units as glorified bodyguards to ' keep you safe '.

You sigh, as you climb under your covers those problems seem like a long way away from you as you drift off with an empty mind.

It was morning, the sun was shining brightly through the windows giving an orange glow to the room.

You were up before your roommates, had brushed your teeth and were already preparing for your project.

You had to do well, you were depending on a scholarship for university, your family could simply not afford it otherwise.

When your first signs of morning hunger begin to strike you venture outside your room in order to satiate yourself. You find that it’s still quiet only a few students up like yourself, you find a coffee machine and immediately begin to make one for yourself.

“While you're at it could you make one for me too".

a deep voice drawls out.

You almost jump out of your skin at the sound his voice breaking the silence you had been enjoying. Jeon Jungkook.

You scowl at him, choosing to ignore him carrying on making your own cup.

He whistles under his breath.

“wow, edgy or a bitch? I can’t decide".

He taunts you.

You roll your eyes at him and sigh in annoyance, his eyebrows raise at this.

“you’re clearly not a morning person".

He speaks.

You mutter under your breath.

" or maybe I’m just not a YOU person, not everyone lives to be nice to you. "

He lifts his hands up in a mock surrender.

“Okay, okay I get it it's a bad time for you jeez.... I suppose I'll have to make my own coffee".

He moves closer to you, totally invading your personal space, clearly, he had never heard of a personal bubble! You scowl and try to move away but he’s faster and is hovering over you before you know it. He looks down at you with those pretty dark eyes.

They’re so gorgeous.

Not that it matters to you because he is still an asshole, and he still ruined your morning.

“get out of my face Jeon Jungkook".

You say between clenched teeth.

You’re not some sort of pushover.

Yes, you're clever, as society classes a nerd but you're not one to let people walk all over you.

If he’s shocked, he doesn’t let on, just hums and lets you walk away, which you do, a little aggressively. You got back to your room and let out a sound of annoyance, the girls are still sleeping.

You sigh.

This was going to be a long trip.

After an uneventful morning, the wait was over and finally the teachers had called you to gather in the common area. Much to your dismay however there would be no actual data collecting until the police had secured the area, which meant that your whole day was pretty much wasted. The other students were chatting and gossiping and being idiots as per usual.

It’s not that you thought you were better than them, it's just that they were so mundane, so lifeless. They were just living on with no sense of direction. You suppose that's what you get for attending a school for rich kids though.

You could never fit in.

So, you never tried. People took pity on you every now and then offered you a smile. You smiled back but that was it. Your thoughts are running and to clear your head you decide to go outside for a little breather.

There isn’t much, just a few abandoned train tracks that seemingly lead into nowhere, a few broken fences and lots of grass. Not much time after this you head to bed.

Finally, the day had arrived, you could collect your samples.

You are so glad that it’s an individual project because you honestly cannot even imagine working with one of those air heads.

You shudder at the memory of having to work with Taehyung last semester for a chemistry practical.

You had to basically pull all the weight for your grade.

So, you get on working your way through your work and proving or disproving your hypothesis.

You’re pleased at the work that you completed. Not entirely satisfied but satisfied enough, for now.

You let out a stiff yawn, you need to stretch and need a little fresh air since you had spent the last few hours writing up your data and making graphs to compliment them.

You forgo your jacket since the weather isn’t so bad.

It’s nice.

When you go outside there are quite a few students already there, goofing around. There is also a pretty scenery, that in all honesty you had not appreciated until right now.

“Wow" you mutter under your breath.

Maybe I should try living outside my own head sometimes.

You spot some students surrounding a police officer and the curiosity gets the better of you and your soon wandering around the outskirts of their conversation.

Alas, it was merely a fruitless conversation. The police officer telling the other about his escapades and how they will be good in hands.

You lose yourself to your own thoughts again and look at the scenery. Until a little scuffle, breaks you out of your thoughts.

“What was that? There was a movement down there!! “

A boy called Josh calls out.

The police officer had also noticed it, then a sound of a gunshot sounds through the air.

The police officers curse and begin to get ready to scout the area. They want you all to go away, be safe inside but you’re all young adults- you want to see what’s going on.

Everyone gathers, watching the officers.

You scan the area; you spot the balcony that looks over the area just in front of the cabins.

Perfect you think that’s the perfect spot to see what’s going on.

So, you begin to climb up the steps to that room, when you get there, you can see everything.

You see a dead dog, a dead bird and the gun which had killed them laid out to where the officers were heading.

Fear grips your heart; your heartbeat is erratic. You think you see the shape of figure retreating into the distance but before you can look again, you feel the ground give way under you.

You let out a shriek, feeling yourself falling.

Is this truly how my life end you wonder I didn’t even get to complete my PhD?

Yet, instead of the hard fall that your body had been anticipating; your landing is softer and lets out a low grunt.

You're sure you're dead and have entered heaven.

Slowly you register a warm feeling under your legs and a secure one at your waist.

oh, this feels nice.

you think, eyes still closed until you hear some chaos in the distance.

what's happening?

Why is heaven so noisy? Are they partying because I’ve arrived? Was I actually an angel all this time am I coming home?

Ah you think this must be the angels- I knew all those days spent doing charity would help me.

You open your eyes and you’re met with bambi eyes staring back at you.

Slowly you begin to piece the rest of your angel together.

“Jeon Jungkook? “

You try and raise your voice to compliment your surprise, but it comes out in a more whisper.

“But this, Jungkook, you were an angel all this time? “you say.

His eyebrows knot together in confusion.

“What are you talking about strawberry?”

You gasp.

"Do we all get code names in heaven? You’re a pretty angel Jungkook. “

Then your eyes zero in on the scar on his cheek.

“Aren’t Angel’s supposed to be blemish free? Is that? Are you fallen? Wait.... for me? Are you my angel Jungkook? “

His eyes, which had previously shown confusion are now coloured with amusement.

“You talk a lot don’t you my little strawberry”.

You vaguely hear the sounds behind you before you begin to feel drowsy and fall limp the arms of your unexpected angel.

Jungkook was, of course no angel, your delirious ass was just doing and saying delirious things. You were going to be mortified when you woke up.

When you come to your room in a dark room, tucked into a warm bed. Your headaches aches as if someone is using a sledgehammer to hit it every second.

‘Agh’ you let out a pained groan.

What even happened? you wonder in your head.

You move quickly, getting out of bed ignoring your protesting limbs.  You almost reach the doors until a pair of arms trap you.

‘woah woah where do you think you're going?’

You let out a scream, completely startled. A hand comes to cover your mouth.

‘man, you really do have a set of lungs, don’t you? ‘

You stop struggling in his embrace to match his voice to a face. Its familiar.

‘Jeon Jungkook?’ you let a little unsure and panic still evident in your voice.

‘your one and only’

You frown.

‘mine?’

He smirks at you,

‘that's right yours strawberry’.

You shake your head.

‘are you smoking something? Are you high right now?’

He pouts a little then, it changes his look completely. He looks a little cute.

‘you don't remember? ‘ he cocks his head to the side and points to himself. ‘I'm your angel’.

You scoff.

‘Please in what world are YOU an angel? You're far from it’.

Then it all comes back to you.

Jungkook watches as the realisation begins to show on your face.

‘Oh my god I had a concussion, you cannot be serious right now ‘

He chuckles.

'The words still came out of your mouth' Jungkook counters, he leans closer to you, his face way to close for your liking.

You feel your face grow warm from his proximity, but you don't give him the satisfaction of knowing that.

You scoff and push him away.

‘You're insane’.

He accepts the distance you've placed between the two of you and he chooses to smirk at you from where he is standing.

‘And you're crazy for me’.

You let out an incredulous laugh, not believing him.

‘Oh, my lord, please shut up for the sake of my sanity’.

He chuckles at your flustered state and you scramble your brain to find a change of subject.

‘okay whatever now just excuse me because I need to go back to my room’.

You move to begin walking to the door, but his voice halts your movements.

‘This is your room now’.

You whip around to face him.

‘What?! Ha as if Jeon, why would they room us together- were supposed to separate for the opposite genders- which I totally get when you're involved’ you say disbelief painting your voice. You whisper the last part though.

He puts his hands into his pockets and shrugs.

‘Protection?’

You set him a hard stare.

‘Save your lame ass men superiority talks for someone else i am having a severe case of I'm not interested’.

Why the hell would you need Jungkook for protection, it reeks of patriarchy and you hate it.

He shrugs.

‘Listen princess I don't know why either really to be honest but I'm not complaining-’

You don't bother entertaining him for much longer.

This can't be true. You cannot be paired into a room with him. He cannot be your new roommate - heck now tiffany doesn't seem so bad. Flirting asshole, you mutter under your breath as you begin searching for your teacher.

You only learn a bitter truth, due to the collapsing of the room you had to be relocated into another room and the only person without a roommate was Jungkook. They ‘trusted’ you enough that you would be able to handle it and not to do anything you were not supposed to.

‘We trust you, y/n’ was what she had told you.

You spend your time cursing out both her and Jungkook as you gather your belongings to move into your new room.

You're so caught up in your own thoughts that you don't notice a foot that comes out to trip you.

You look up and see the faces of three stupid bitches.

Tiffany Jessica and Irene.

They seemed to consider themselves above everybody else, though you've no idea why. Aside from flawless looks they seemed to live pretty empty life in your eyes. They were living definitions of empty shells walking around.

You get up quietly from the ground, you'll gain nothing from engaging with them, maybe you'd lose a few brainless. You just want to go back and rest - your head is killing you.

But to your disappointment they begin to talk.

‘Well, well well, if it isn't the school's new slut moving into MY boyfriend's room’.

You have to let a little laugh at this. This one is seriously deluded. Jungkook didn't do relationships you knew that. Everybody knew that. They had hooked up about 3 months ago and even though he does his best to ignore her she still insists that he is her boyfriend. It's just pathetic and a bit sad you suppose. Her obvious attraction to him which he just does not reciprocate.

She becomes enraged at your actions.

‘listen here you little bitch you better not even think of starting anything with my man-’ she spits out at you.

You snap back then, unable to hold your tongue.

‘I am not a slut, and I will not go after your man- which fyi  he is not. He is a human and he doesn’t belong to you he never has’

She grows red at your words.

‘you little piece of shit-’

She raises her hand but just then a voice interrupts her and she halts her actions.

‘well if it isn't my new roomie, l’ll take that from you strawberry’ Jungkook says, too cheery for your liking, your still contemplating hitting Jessica.

Jessica begins speaking up, but he ignores her turning to you.

Your mouth almost drops open at his dismissal of Jessica but then again, she is annoying, and he cannot be immune to that.

‘Jungkoooook’ she whines when he doesn’t respond to her the first time.

He still doesn’t entertain her.

He moves to take your things from you, but she speaks again, latching onto his arm.

‘just leave her -cshe's just an annoying stuck-up bitch’.

He responds to this under his breath laughing.

‘reminds me of someone ’

She doesn't understand his comment.

‘huh?’ she says almost comically.

‘who baby?’ she pouts at him ‘my poor baby having to deal with such people, just leave with me and we can-’

‘no’ he sets her with a hard stare.

It's like she has forgotten that you're there, so you decide to use this to your advantage, letting Jungkook deal with them. You move to get your suitcase, but a hand stops yours. Its Jungkook.

‘I don’t think so strawberry - I'll be getting those for you’.

You turn to look at him scowl adorning your features.

‘I don’t need your help Jeon’.

He smirks at you.

‘no no - I insist’.

He dismisses Jessica with a wave of his hand and begins to walk away your suitcase in his hand, which prompts you to follow along.

‘What. Was. That. Jungkook?!’ you say when the door closes, you’re fuming because he had made it seem as though you were dating or doing things together which meant that they would keep bothering you, which is just something that you don’t want.

He turns around to face you.

‘oh, don’t get your panties in such a twist, I just needed to get the fuck away from her’.

He sounds angry and this is the Jungkook that you are more accustomed to. Not the flirty one you have been seeing. Hopefully he had given up on whatever he was trying to achieve with that. He was a rude asshole who was just to used to seeing things come out in his favour.

‘excuse me, you just fuelled her whack ass thoughts and next time don’t use me as your escape route’ you say matching his hostile tone.

‘oh, don’t be such a priss, it saved you as much as it saved me’.

An exasperated noise escapes your throat.

‘well maybe you should have kept it in your pants lover boy’.

He sets you with a hard stare.

‘oh, shut up - you don’t know me’ he grits out.

You cock your head to the side much like he had done to you earlier in the day.

‘hmmm I think I know you pretty well Jungkook, you're not as unreadable as you like to think, Jeon Jungkook the infamous bad boy who uses girls to fuel his ego and is used by girls to fuel their own ego and status quo among their own stupid--’

You do not get to finish you sentence however because you're harshly being pinned to the door. His grip on you is hard and it stings but you meet his gaze.

‘shut the fuck up y/n’ the tone of his voice is almost carnal, animal like.

You seriously had hit a nerve.

‘I go beyond your perceptions of me- you little miss goody two shoes’.

You spit back in his face.

‘I've yet to see you act more like a crazed rabbit Jungkook and to be honest I don’t plan on finding out the depths of your character either. I don’t fucking care about you’.

You push him aside and move to unpack your suitcase.

He mutters something under his breath that you can't hear, and he walks out slamming the door behind him.

‘well, that was fun’ you say and begin to take out your notes and books that you will need through the day.

When you wake up the next you feel like you’ve been hit by a ton of bricks. The painkillers had given you the illusion that you were okay. You look a mess, you're tired, you cannot believe that this happened.  You had been looking forward to this for so long, they had told you that another student would be collecting your data. Your new roommate. Jeon Jungkook. He was going to be collecting your data.

This is preposterous! He would probably sabotage you on purpose! This cannot happen, but they wouldn’t budge from their choice. You huff as you look out of the window, where you could be collecting your data along with the other students. Darn you and your curiosity.

They always did say didn’t they- that curiosity killed the cat.

Your walking around the room, pacing- that’s how bored you are. You had reorganised your things 3 times and colour coded all you notes, redrew your graphs, you had done everything that you thought would keep you busy but here you are sitting with nothing to do.  You look around the room see Jungkook's things laying on the ground.

You sigh into the empty room again and just lay down waiting for them to come back. You end up falling asleep.

You're stirred from your sleep, quite rudely by a book being thrown at the foot of your bed. You sit up, still groggy and look at Jungkook.

‘what the hell man’

He stares at you blankly.

‘There's your work priss’

You're not bothered by his hostile tone instead open the book and seeing what he had done, or you suppose looking at it what he had not done. The more you look at the work the more the frown on your face deepens.

‘what the hell is this Jungkook?’

He looks up at you annoyed.

‘the work? Thought you were meant to be a genius?’

You scowl at him.

‘this Jungkook? Is unacceptable a nursery kid could do way better than this !’

He rolls his eyes at you.

‘and? That’s what you're going to get priss so deal with it’.

You make an exasperated sigh.

‘you've used the wrong measurement and everything Jungkook’.

‘look - I don’t care. I didn’t want to do this for you anyway’.

‘like I wanted YOU to do it for me’.

You sigh,

You keep bumping into him everywhere, you know he is your roommate but he is always there at the cafeteria taking the last donut which you had been craving pushing in line, making unnecessary comments and he makes the room so messy!

It’s the same thing for the next few outings, Jungkook comes with the same half assed versions of the data you need.

You try, you really you try so hard to use the data sets he provided but its no use. They're absolutely useless, so you decide to take matters into your own hands.

Your going to sneak out early in the morning, you have to sneak past the guards which as you’ve gathered won't be as hard as one may think because they are not good or much invested in their job anyway.

You prepare yourself and head to set out in the morning. You quietly get up so as not to disturb or wake Jungkook. If he sees you, you know that there will be trouble.

You throw on a hoodie and grab a notebook, a pen and your watch. You have to be back before anyone can notice that you're gone.  You steel yourself one last time, giving yourself a pep talk and sneak out. You hold your breath as you walk past the room of your supervisor and out the back door of the cabins.

This isn't so bad you think. Once you're out of sight of the guards and you think your safe, you let out a sigh of relief and do a little shimmy out of your happiness. You are so pleased and proud of yourself. What you didn’t know that behind you, watching your every move was a boy covered in tattoos with a cigarette in his hand watching you with an amused face.

Jungkook was, not as you thought asleep when you had snuck out. He was also outside, leaning on the side of the building a cigarette in his hand, he couldn’t sleep that night, it happened to him on most nights so he routinely wakes up to have a smoke. On this particular day there is not the usual eerie morning silence that he is used to, but a few grunts and hisses to accompany it. He furrows his brows.

Is that? He thinks y/n!?!?!?!?!?

No way he thinks what the hell is she up to?

Then he catches sight of your notebook and pen.

'Oh, what a nerd' he mutters under his breath. Then he smirks.

He can totally use this to his advantage.

He stubs his cigarette, pulls his hoodie over his head and follows you.

Your heart is still racing you honestly cannot believe that you. l/n f/n are doing this.

‘What a badass’ you say into the silence.

‘Badass? Sneaking out to do bloody work is your idea of badass?’ a voice speaks up behind you.

You shriek startled and are met with Jungkook.

Why is it always him?

‘what in the bloody tarnation's.... are you trying to kill me Jungkook?!’ you say putting your hand on your heart.

He grins pleased at the reaction he had elicited from you.

He cocks his head to the side.

‘what the hell are you doing here ?!’ you hiss at him.

‘could ask you the same thing strawberry’ he replies.

You look at him.

You were so sure that you had been quiet, how could he be here to ruin everything.

‘you do realise that I actually have name, and it's not strawberry’ you say to him.

He shrugs.

‘Yeah but you always smell like them’.

You scoff;

‘and you always reek of cigarettes.’

He frowns but then asks you again.

‘what are you doing here?’

You think of excuses,

‘I'm - I'm on a walk’ you say.

He lifts his eyebrow up.

‘a walk?’

You nod.

‘that's right for my daily exercise its been a pain to be stuck indoors’.

He snorts.

‘you're on a walk with your graph paper pad and pencil case?’

You curse inside your head.

‘yeah I am a nerd after all’ you say, hoping and praying that he’ll just let you go on your way.

He doesn’t

‘I don’t know, you look awfully suspicious to me, do tell why you're heading to the sight of our data collection points when the trail track is in the opposite direction?’ he says.

You rack your brains for an answer.

‘well, I like an adventure’ you say, standing straight.

‘oh, is that so?’ he says laughter infiltrating his tone.

‘yes’, you say meeting his eyes.

‘hmm’ he says ‘I don’t believe you’ he says.

‘do you wanna know what I think?’ he continues.

He takes one step closer to you.

‘I think that our resident miss goody two shoes is sneaking off when told specifically that she can't’ his gaze burns into yours

You feel yourself going red out of embarrassment.

‘I literally have no idea what you're talking about Jungkook' you say breathless.

He leans closer and you can feel his body heat, he continues to bore his eyes into your own and you almost fall into his gaze until you feel your book being snatched out of your hand.

‘HEY!’ you say reaching for it.

But he holds it higher than himself, opens it to the last written on page.

‘new data collection points’ he reads out ‘and oh would you look at that ! It has todays dates written on it’ he says looking down at you with a squint in his eyes.

You huff.

‘well obviously I had to do this because how on earth could I let your lame ass results and data reading be used for my final piece – I'm not looking to fail’ you say venom laced in every word.

He scowls at you.

‘there was nothing wrong with my results princess’ he grits out.

‘oh, please save it’ you snap back ‘you didn’t even use the same measurements – your hopeless’.

‘well, if I'm so fucking useless you should do my work for me’ he says.

You set him a level stare.

‘what?’

‘you heard me’ he says with a roll of his eyes.

‘and why in the hell would I do that? I don’t care if you fail Jungkook, heck I don’t care if you get kicked out’ you tell him.

He shakes his head.

‘well, I mean I could go back right now and tell Miss Taylor-’ he begins.

You narrow your eyes at him.

‘You wouldn’t dare’.

He holds a staring contest with you.

‘oh, wouldn’t I?’ he says.

You both hold each other's gazes before you give in.

You cannot believe the audacity of this asshole.

‘fine whatever asshole’ you say folding your arms and turning around.

He grins in victory and places your notebook back into your hands.

‘chop chop partner get to it’ he says.

You glare at him.

‘partners pull equal weight Jungkook ‘

He rolls his eyes.

‘I don’t really care – you just need to get a move on’.

You turn around no longer wanting to deal with his annoying ass.

You make it forward a few steps before you stop and turn around.

‘why are you following me?’  you ask him.

He rolls his eyes at your apparent dumbness.

‘well smartass, there is a killer on the loose if you didn’t know’.

You freeze up for a second,

Shit

You had almost forgotten. You don’t let him see that you're scared.

‘and? ‘ you say feigning composure.

‘what the hell are you going to do if he pops out of the woods anyway?’

He shrugs.

‘I dunno actually a lot more than you could do anyway’

You stare at him.

‘I could be a black belt in karate for all you know’.

He laughs.

‘okay princess whatever - I just need to make sure that you're not going to fuck this up’.

So, you turn going to the place you need to, to collect your data pieces.

With having to do Jungkook's work as well, it takes a lot longer to complete than you would have liked.

He is surprisingly bearable in the mornings that you both sneak off though. He doesn’t say much. Just watches you – pretends he isn't though.

You catch him once. Its been about 2 weeks since you started this godawful task, and Jungkook's notes and work were in dire need of help so its taking you time. This time however you meet his gaze before he is able to pull away.

You cock your head to the side.

‘what are you staring at?’ you say placing your hands on your hips.

He says something inaudible under his breath.

‘what was that?’

He snaps at you.

‘do you think you have tie to stand around making idle talk with me? The work ain’t going to do itself princess.’

You huff in annoyance.

How dare he! This was just plain wrong anyway I should not even be doing this, but you knew it was the only way. You couldn't risk getting caught and with Jungkook you wouldn't be surprised if he really did rat you out you to all the teachers. And if he did well, you wouldn’t be receiving a very good reference.

It was during an early morning that you hear Jungkook walk off into the distance. Probably to smoke, such a bad habit you tsk.

But you're also done for the day – so you begin to head back on your own.

You feel the grass brush against your feet as you walk back. You’re humming along to that song that was always on the radio, when you hear it. A little whimper - then a cry. You know that you shouldn’t go to look, you know that you're paying for your curiosity already and you don’t need another thing to happen, but you just cannot help yourself!

You follow the sound, going on a detour from the track.

You do consider yourself somewhat of a badass but a serial killer? Yeah, they kinda scare the shit out of you. You hold your breath and walk as quietly and slowly as you can. You hear the whimper again to your left but its deeper into the woods.

As you walk closer you see a pool of blood - your eyes widen, and your heartbeat becomes erratic.

‘what the fuck?’ you whisper into the silence.

You walk closer to the body of the animal and you can feel your knees grow a little weak you can see a white paper which has been tainted red with the blood of the animal that was killed.

You gasp, taking it up in your hands. Your hands also become stained with the redness.

It's in Morse code.

-.-- --- ..- / ... .... --- ..- .-.. -.. -. .----. - / -... . / .-- .- -. -.. . .-. .. -. --. / --- ..- - / .- .-.. --- -. .

(YOU SHOULDN'T BE WANDERING OUT ALONE)

You look at it for a while and rack your brains to be able to translate it but no such look. Your mind is busy running at 100miles per hour. As you try and clear your head and look at the note one more time, but a noise in the distance pulls you way from any semblance of concentration that you could have obtained.

You frantically look around trying to locate where the sound had come from. Your senses are all on a high right now. You shove the piece of paper into your pocket and begin to go back the way that you came. After the first few steps you begin running your head running wild with the idea of being found dead in ditch. Your nearly at the main path which you had strayed from. You make it onto the path, and you bend over catching your breath when two arms encircle you from behind.

You let out a scream.

A hand is placed over your mouth.

‘shut the fuck up y/n’.

You recognise THAT voice. Its Jeon Jungkook. Why is this motherfucker always trying to scare you? Your turn around and hit him on the chest,

‘what the actual hell Jeon, you gave me a bloody heat attack and a half’.

He doesn’t respond. He is looking at you, his eyebrows are furrowed and his eyes have a glint of anger. He is furious.

‘where the fuck did you go y/n?’ he says, he holds your wrist stopping you from hitting him again.

He holds it in the air holding your gaze.

‘I was.... walking back’ you didn't want him to know what you had found. He would probably tell you it was a bad idea to even translate it. Which it was, but what is life if not for taking risks?

You yank your hand from his grasp.

He looks at you an unreadable expression on his face.

“you’re a fucking liar “he says.

You scoff.

“oh please, what’s it to you anyway jungkook, you left me first “

He doesn’t say anything, but observes you, trying to look for signs of what you’re hiding.

He had found one too, a dead animal and a note written in Morse.

But he could read it and he knew he was in trouble

“Be careful, or your little girlfriend may be snatched from right under your arms “

He swore under his breath as he read it and immediately began to make his way back to you.

“strawberry?” he calls out but you’re not there.

You’re not there and he hates the feeling of dread that sits in his stomach.

He runs back the way you came, but he still finds no trace of you

“fucking hell where did she go?”

He almost gives up and is going to tell the police when you appear before him, out of breath and you look terrified.

He knows you’re lying, if you were where, you said you were, he would have seen you.

He narrows his eyes at you again.

“I left for two seconds and you ran off. Where the fuck did you go? “

He asks, he wants you tell him, needs you to, he’s overcome with this sense to protect you but you don’t trust him. He needs to change that.

He lets you believe that you have him fooled, that he believes your story and he begins to walk back to the cabins right before the call for breakfast is sounded. You follow after him breathing in a sigh of relief that he had believed you.

That night you find it difficult to sleep. You need to find out the meaning of the Morse code, but you don't have access to a book that will help you translate, meaning that you will have to ask around without looking too suspicious.

You decide that a police officer would do nicely, if you seem overly invested in their job, they would just give you the information.

You spot the officer who looks younger than most, you remember his name.

Park Jimin.

You approach him cautiously.

“Officer park?”

He turns around to face you, smiling softly.

Oh, he’s cute you think.

“yes miss?”

You smile at him warmly.

“nothing serious it’s just that I was wondering if you would like some company, it must be a little boring for you out here on your own “

You say to him and you’re glad you asked him because either way his face breaks out into a smile that has your heart fluttering.

“how very kind of you miss! And yes, a little company wouldn't hurt “, he grins at you.

As you strike up conversation, with the officer you fail to notice a figure dressed in black listening in on your conversation. Jungkook listens in as you try and get information out of officer. He knew it. You had also come across the same note, as he had. He wonders what yours said.

He leaves after a bit, leaving both of you oblivious to the fact that he was even there in the first place.

When you get back to your room, you see Jungkook sitting at the foot of his bed frown on his face.

You ignore him and write down the information you'd just got given by Officer Park. You felt a little bad manipulating him when he was so nice but you just had to know what it meant.

Jungkook speaks up.

“that was a nice conversation you were having with Officer Park “

He says,

You whip you’re head up to look at him and closing your notebook harshly.

“What? Were you eavesdropping on my conversation?”

He rolls his eyes

“Why would I be listening to the conservation of the school nerd with a cop? No, I just happened to hear in passing “

You let out a breath that you didn’t know you were holding.

“That’s mighty rude of y-" you begin to retort before he cuts you off

“what’s a biology nerd like you need with Morse code?” He asks.

Your mind malfunctions for a moment until you bring yourself back together.

“A little extra knowledge hurts no one you know?” you say appearing nonchalant.

He narrows his eyes

“I know it”

You look at him

“you do?”

He nods,

“why need something translating?” he tries.

You think about it, but ultimately decided against showing him the note you found.

You have no clue what it says. You don’t want him understanding before you do.

You shake your head,

“No, I don’t “

You say, deciding enough is enough and you need to sleep now to be up in the morning.

The next morning you sleep in, meaning that you couldn’t do the work that was set out for you. You stretch and moan as you get out of bed when you sit up and open your eyes fully your locks onto the Bambi ones from across the room. You let out a shriek!

‘What the hell why were you watching me you creeper!’ you say pointing a finger at Jungkook.

He rolls his eyes at you.

‘oh, please don’t flatter yourself’.

‘why didn’t you wake me up? Its so late !’ you question him.

He looks at you and says words that you don’t think that you would hear.

‘I think that we should lay off for a bit strawberry’

You look at him in shock

‘but why!?’

He doesn’t really give you much of an answer in his usual Jungkook manner.

You sigh.

Over the next few weeks, you rarely bump into Jungkook, you see him sometimes in the cafeteria and you can always feel him just watching you it makes you grow warm when you notice his staring.

Jungkook is also going crazy. You drive him crazy.

You guess that you'll have to work at the same pace as everyone, truthfully you had actually caught up with your work that was missed a while ago, you were just doing extra readings to stay ahead. One step ahead of everyone. But you guess that that is going to be changed now.

It had been a while since you had been on your morning trips with jungkook and though you hate to admit it, you kind of missed it.

He wasn't as bad company as you thought he would be, he was oddly quiet which meant that without him talking as much, you really got to admire his beauty. And good lord was he handsome, you understand why people are attracted to him, when his mouth is closed, he’s fine. Basically, you became a little horny when you saw him, it had been ages since you had had sex even masturbated, since you now had room with him.

Jungkook has such strong sharp features which sometimes go all soft, if he pouts while he’s thinking or a bird catches his attention, his eyes will go big and doe like. It's cute. Everybody had two sides you suppose, yours was your horny side (lol what)

Okay maybe, more time to admire him was a bad thing, you did not need to have sexual fantasies with him, no, that was a big no no.

It's been a few weeks since Jungkook had asked you to lay low for a while and in that time, you had been asking around about the killer to the police. You tried your best not to seem suspicious about it though, if they caught on – well it wouldn’t exactly end well. So, you make slow progress, you did make progress though, however.

You could now understand the note and while it scared you, it also ignited something in you that you didn’t even know that you possessed inside of you. You wanted to outdo him, you want to find him, lead him into a trap or something like that anyway. You want to catch him.

Something in the back of your mind is telling you begging you to stop being so stupid, but you ignore and continue to daydream about catching this bastard.

But it can only cure your boredom for a while – you get bored and what better to do when you're bored than to read erotica novels?

You had packed this book with you – the secrets of the alluring painter in France. You had taken to reading at night time on some nights.

Like tonight.

You need a wind down, so you pull out your book, and it has such racy scenes that leave you clenching around nothing.

Your sexual imagination goes wild when you read the erotica in the book and the way they make it seem so fiery, you were no virgin - you knew what sex was like, but never has it been close to the way it is in the book.

You’ve allowed yourself to fall into this horrible habit, at night, when Jungkook is asleep to touch yourself, play with yourself, pretending it is you who is being touched by Kim Taehyung the painter with many secrets.

You feel yourself growing more frustrated with each passage you read, it becomes a little irritating and, you have to touch yourself or you'll go crazy, the man in the book was doing it so well, so hot.

Kim Taehyung, he was described as an utter beauty, soft black hair and soft eyes, a deep voice that just made the reader swoon, you close your eyes and reach your hands down to your shorts, they slip past the hem.

You wish you could moan, wish that you could be vocal, like you were in your bedroom when it was just you and your pillow, but there was one big problem and that was Jeon Jungkook.

Why did you have to room with him?

You lighten your breathing and listen for signs of him being awake, but he seems to be breathing really deep, he is asleep you assure yourself.

You turn the lamp off, at the side of your bed, setting the book on the bedside table.

You trail your hand down your stomach, much like Taehyung had done to the main character, he slowly lets his fingers flutter over the top of her shorts, and you do the same. You build the tension, like it's his beautiful hands working against you.

You pause and let your fingers slip past the hem of your panties, you trace over the fabric covering you - first over your mound, stroking sensually.

How had Taehyung done it?

Right yes, he had used his nails slightly and grazed over lightly, a slight pressure but nothing that hurt - it was just enough to make you squirm under your own touch.

You feel your own wetness, feel how obscene it is in the darkness of the night.

Jungkook is right there, and while it scares you, it also thrills you, you feel a new wave of arousal and adrenaline when you remember he is there.

Slowly and as quietly as possible you shuffle, moving to take your shorts off, it's a little loud but you think that you're okay, Jungkook is out like a log.  After a moment you continue to tease yourself.

Running your fingertips over your lips, pressing down on your hole and clenching, withholding the need to hiss.

You raise your hand further and your fingers land right at the centre of your pleasure.

Your clit. Oh, the beautiful bundle of nerves.

You cover your mouth with a hand to stifle the moan that you almost let out when you begin to rub small circles around the sensitive nub.

When you can’t get enough your panties are next to go, and when the cold air hits your wet centre you have to hold your breath, shaky.

You reach down and gather your slick slowly, spreading it all over your centre, making yourself drown in your own arousal, you use your middle and ring finger to slide up and down at a pace that leaves you edged and eager for more, you need to bring yourself to the very edge to get yourself the release that you’re after, you free hand travels up to your ever sensitive boobs, you play with them, brushing over the nipple, making them perk and then groping them while you rub at your clit.

A dirty thought crosses your mind, when you remember the boy who was asleep across from you.

What if, he was the one to touch, the one touching you, with those beautiful hands of his, those big hands.

You stifle another moan, as you think about him, hovering over you, giving it to you just right. You had heard that Jungkook could actually make a girl cum while having sex, that made you a little interested. It’s just he always opens his mouth and is an ass and ruins everything. But right now, in your imagination, only his looks and reputation matter, you twist and turn his character to be someone that you can gain pleasure from.

You can the pleasure increase and you begin to fasten your speed until you feel the signs of your orgasm and then you pull away. Edging yourself.

Your breathing is a little heavy and your work on controlling it, both your hands go to fondle your breasts and you unconsciously lift your hips, humping the air, you lean down again and enter three fingers easily into your own heat.

The squelching sound heard is deafening in the silent room, your cheeks burn red and you pull out slowly, so that was a no no, you would have to focus on your clit for you orgasm. Which was fine because you were so sensitive from playing with yourself, you know that it would only take a few more strokes to get there.

You press the fingers that were just inside of you, against your sensitive bud and you rub in slowly circles and then fastening your place and then slowing once more.

Jungkook comes into your mind again, ugh, now his lips, his pretty pink lips and the way he licks them, and the way they glisten under the sun. What if they were attached to your clit, if he was using his face to give you pleasure, like Taehyung had done to the main character of the novel, God it was so filthy.

Its driving you insane and you love it, the frustration will only make your release all the more powerful.

After a while you feel the fire blooming in your bottom of your stomach, and you quicken your pace to the point where you feel light and the waves of pleasure rack over your whole body.

You press your hand to your mouth again to conceal the gasps that are escaping you, you sigh and fall back onto your pillow feeling so much better and lighter.

Gosh did that feel good. You were aware that in your mind alarms were going off in your mind. You had thought of Jungkook while masturbating. It was a line you have no idea why you crossed. How would you look him in the eye now?

After a while, you pull up your panties and shorts and you promise yourself a shower in the morning.

What you didn't know was that the raven-haired boy of your fantasies was in fact awake and now painfully hard as he listened to your filthy little moans and gasps, he grabs his own member in his pants, strokes slowly. He spreads the pre-cum over his member before setting the fast pace that he liked, his breaths through his nose – to conceal the way his breathing has become strained. His hair becomes damp from sweat and it sticks to his forehead. He came much faster that he would care to admit the thought of you right there yet unreachable the fact that you were so NAUGHTY under all that good girl.

Turning him on, making him needy.

He breathes heavy, thinking of you under him as he squirts out cum into his pants, Jungkook too showers in the morning after you.

After this Jungkook stays up at night, listening to you, seeing if you would do it again, you do and, on those nights, Jungkook cums at the same time as you. He feels a little pathetic, he knows that he can fuck a lot of girls in the class right, but it wasn't you, God he wants it to be you writhing underneath him.

It’s the next morning and you're getting ready for your shower.

You're gathering your clothes and shampoo and creams into a little bundle and are about to open the door to the shower, when it is opened for you. The song that you were softly humming gets stuck in your throat when you register that the door was opened by Jungkook.

A very naked Jungkook.

Your face grows red, and your eyes wander over his gorgeous body, the tattoos that trail up his arm and a few on his waist, God they looked amazing.

Your ogling comes to a stop when he clears his throat. Oh, shit you think - I was staring. You quickly look up and your eyes meet Jungkook's.

He is smirking at you and as soon as you meet his gaze, he lets his own wander over body – taken in the skin that was exposed in your pyjama shorts and a t-shirt that had been small for you since you turned 13 years old.

He looks up and down your body brazenly before meeting your eyes. He licks his lips, and you zero in on it. God it was so annoying that he was this hot.

How could this be happening now? When you had spent a while avoiding him? And him you? Why did this happen after you were thinking of him last night? Oh god you grow red again and you think what if he had heard you? God, that would be embarrassing. You look at his lips again, avoiding his gaze again but maybe his eyes would have been a better option because as soon as you look at his lips, the same filthy thoughts come back to you - you shift uncomfortably trying to calm yourself. In that time, you don't notice but Jungkook has come closer to you.

You register his closeness when a water droplet from his hair falls onto your cheek. You move away slightly.

You don’t realise it but in your extended silence of checking each other out the both of you have moved closer to each other. There is no longer what people would call a healthy distance between the two of you anymore. He looks down at you and licks his lips again. His hair is wet and the way he runs his hand through it – he looks so good like this. Your dirty thoughts run wild again. Its only when another water droplet from his hair falls onto your cheek that you finally snap out of it. You move a step back.

“You look a little hot strawberry is anything the matter?” He asks you, a teasing lilt on his voice.

It’s way too early for this, you cannot be dealing with this right now, not when your mind has gone on a memory flashback to last night and he was right here in front you, so very naked.

Still, you feign your ever composed self.

“I’m just fine” you say through gritted teeth.

“I need to shower and your kind of standing in my way” you tell him.

He chuckles, a deep chuckle, gosh how are you this horny in the morning? Stop it y/n you think.

“I don't think you really mind though do you strawberry, you seem to have a very different secretive side” he says, cocking his head to the side.

You blush, shit had he heard you?

“I have no idea what you're talking about Jungkook” you say to him “I need to shower though”.

You move to get away from his hearted stare but just before you enter the washroom, a hand grabs onto your wrist and pulls you back.

Jungkook looks at you, a deep and confusing stare.

“Be careful, it’s quite wet in there” he says and then his tongue pokes into the side of his cheek. Then suddenly, he lets you go and walks off to his side of the room, your left in shock at his words and quickly scurry to get into the bedroom before more heated tension breaks through.

You shake your head of all thoughts and quickly go into the shower, what you don’t realise is that you accidently drop something, the note with the raven-haired boy who you had left in the bedroom.

Its later on during this day that Jungkook approaches you.

'Hey strawberry’ he says to you.

You raise your eyebrows at him, what’s with his sudden kindness.

‘hey’ you reply voice dipped in surprised.

‘Oh, shut up, I just came to talk to you’.

You look at him.

‘I didn’t say anything but okay…. talk then’ you gesture your hands between your two bodies.

He lets out an exasperated gasp.

‘The note – did you find one?’ he asks. You still in the next sip of coffee that you were going to take. You feel yourself grow cold. How did he find out?

He looks at you.

‘So, you did’.

‘I didn’t say that’ you say tone slightly higher than normal – you were a terrible liar.

He laughs at you

‘Hmm is that so?’

‘I have no idea what you’re talking about Jungkook’.

He looks at you, more serious this time.

“Listen y/n there's no point playing dumb, I found your stupid note anyway”.

You watch mortified as he pulls out the note that you had thought was in your pocket. Well shit then.

“I- I have never seen that before in my life Jungkook” you can't let him know; he would ruin everything - you convince yourself.

He looks at you, he’s getting annoyed that you're lying to him. He pokes his tongue against his cheek again.

“I suggest you stop lying”.

You scoff.

“Why would I ever need to lie to you your nobody to me Jungkook”.

Something akin to hurt flashes across his face for a few seconds before he slams his hands on the table.

“I don’t think you know what you're even getting into strawberry”.

You gather your belongings getting up, you need to get away from him.

“And I don't think you know what the fuck you're talking about Jungkook”.

You walk off leaving him there, but he follows after you,

“Listen I found one too, you don't need to be miss hero or anything”.

You carry on walking, not bothering to give him an answer, he would want to tell the teachers and everyone, they would cancel the trip and then how would you finish gathering your evidence? No, he was insane.

“I don’t know what you're talking about”.

‘you think your so fucking slick, don’t you? Asking around and acting unsuspicious but your wrong I could sense your stupid plan from a mile away’ he says to you, pulling you on your arm effectively stopping you so you can't walk away from him anymore. You struggle out of his hold.

‘and so, what? So, what if you know? What the hell are you going to do Jungkook? Tell on me? Are you going to threaten to tell the teachers because you know what? I’ve been thinking about it and I think they would much rather take my word for yours and all this work I’ve been doing for you – I could easily go right now and show the teachers and say that you forced me to do it!! ’

He looks at you angrily, looks like he is going to swear or curse you out but then his face relaxes.

‘you say that baby, but the truth is I have money and you don’t if I want to manipulate something I can because I have the means and power to do so, my dad's made himself something while yours totted away in the fucking garbage can’.

You feel the anger come over you and he smirks at you.

‘real fucking classy Jeon, yeah insult my parents – like it's their fault they were born into a world where people are born with silver spoons on their mouth, and at least my parents love me Jungkook’

His eyes flash with hurt

‘how do you now my parents don't love me you little bitch?’

You laugh an empty laugh at his face.

‘just look at you – you’re the very definition of boohoo my parents don't love me so I'm going to kick up a mess, so they notice me for once’.

He groans in frustration at your words then.

Somehow amidst your confrontation with Jungkook you had managed to reach your room, why are you here? Why did your feet have to leave you here?

You walk into the room and as soon as he gets in, Jungkook grabs you by the wrist and pins you against the door, your books and pencils fly across the room and while your mortified - he doesn't even bat an eyelid.

Your breathing is both heavy as you look each other in the eyes, waiting for the other to say something.

You struggle against his hold, uselessly, curse him for doing his workout routine every morning.

“You found the fucking note y/n when you went missing in the woods that day, the note that’s in Morse code, the note that you spent a week trying to decode, don't act fucking dumb” he grits out.

You still try and keep up your act,

“I have no clue in the world what you're talking Jeon, I think you're going fucking insane” you seethe out

He growls, yes, he growls.

“Your seriously fucking pissing me off now, I know you did, I know you found it”.

“Fuck off, Jungkook does it look like I care if I am fucking pissing you off”.

He looks into your eyes again and whispers something like “fucking priss” before he is connecting your lips in a kiss, a kiss that is full of ego, passion and heat. You can feel in searing through your body so fiery, setting your nerves alight.

He is relentless in his pace. His mouth against yours and God indeed Jungkook is good kisser. Before you knees grow weak you move your hands to tangle in his hair and you pull at the end causing him groan against his lips, when he does you swipe your tongue into his mouth getting a taste. You pull harder, and he groans again. It was a sound that you know you would like to hear again.

His hands move from the door and one tangles in your hair while the other presses harshly on your waist. You gasp at the pleasure and at this he takes over, he fights your own tongue for dominance and once he wins, he is rough, he wants all his saliva in your mouth, wants his taste on you, wants you to feel him in every way.

When he knows that your just as enthralled by his kisses he pulls back to taunt you - whispering the words against you bruised lips.

“You act like such a fucking little priss don't you? Act like your better than me? Lying to me? Fuck you drive me insane”.

He attacks your neck now, leaving open mouthed kisses along your ear and neck. He nibbles lightly at a few areas and when he gets to just the right place - where your breath hitches and you move your thighs together he bites down harshly without warning and you try you best to suppress your moans. Not wanting to give him any satisfaction.

“I am better than you” you say to him breathlessly, “I don’t just act like it, I am”.

He bites harder at that and you wince - Jungkook is painting you skin wine and purple and your letting him and it feels so goddamn good. He pulls you back by the hair to look at him,

“You don't look much better than me when you are bending at my will, when you're looking so fucked out and I’ve done is fucking kiss you”.

Your answer is swallowed by a moan that you let out as he takes you breasts into his big hands, and squeezes hard, you pull him up from your neck and kiss him again, his lips, your lips bruising and fighting against one another.

He trails his hand down further and dances around the hem of your pants for a while, and you place your own over his, just as your about to lead him further down a knock is heard at your door.

You both freeze

“y/n?” A voice calls out.

You calm yourself before answering, still a little shaky.

“Yes?”

“Our guest speaker has arrived, I just thought you might like to ask him a few questions before he gives his talk”.

Jungkook swears under his breath, raking a hand through his hair.

“You fucking nerd”.

He pulls you back by your pony tail and the back of your head lands on his shoulder, he tilts you slightly, so he has better access to kiss and leave more marks against your skin.

“Ah- I thank you, I’ll come in an ah- while” you say, and you hear the footsteps walk off, Jungkook spins you around and he goes to kiss you again, but you pull away.

“No, just, stop I have to go and talk”.

He looks at you “you fucking nerd” he kisses you once more, like he can't get enough of your mouth.

You pull away again.

uh what in the fuck just happened you think.

This was not meant to happen.

“Look Jungkook, I did, that is my note and I- I’ll, we can talk just not now, okay? I-I have to go. This is important"

He doesn't say anything, just watches as you fix your appearance in the mirror, an appearance he had ruined, and he smirks a little in triumph. He watches as you gather your books that had been thrown onto the floor and he watches as your ass is on display for him and God, he wishes he could grab a handful, but he doesn’t. He just watches.

You walk out the room, without so much as looking at him again and he feels oddly rejected.

He knows that you had felt good, he had heard you groan against his mouth, grind against his clothed member but he hadn't ever been walked out on before. He's not sure what exactly he is feeling. Its not a good feeling - that he was walked out on and for some old ass lecturer too.

He watches the door close, and he sits and waits for you to finish being a nerd. But truthfully it is a little hot to him that you’re so independent, you do things for yourself, your confidence and your wit, it makes you fun, you piss him off, but your company is nicer than the ones that he is used to.

He sighs what the fuck is he getting himself into.

You take a breath as you exit the room,

What in the fuck just happened? you think.

Well, when you promised Jungkook that you would talk to him you hadn't been in your right mind.  Why did you agree to that like fuck? You have no idea what to even say. How do you even start that conversation like...?

"Hey, was just wondering if you would like to you know? Go on a hunt for a serial killer with me?"

Gosh this was so stupid and the kiss, gosh your face heats up as you remember the way he had kissed you - oh so sweet and so naughty!

Gosh you were in bad, as an adult you decide to deal with the problem logically, you'll just ignore him. That will work, Jungkook had a small attention span anyway. You're sure he would forget. You really hope he does.

[functionaxes]

breakdown of how 16personalities scores its test and why it is not a valid mbti test

it’s very damaging that 16personalities is the first result for a mbti test when the reality is you can’t quantify cognitive functions like that.

simply put, 16personalities is actually the Big Five / Global 5 with a coat of paint using the mbti letter dichotomy despite the fact it does not use any jungian concepts whatsoever. the result you’re getting is that of the Big 5. see for yourself.

so lets talk about the Big 5 and what it measures. i’m sure you’ve heard of it.

background of Big 5

the Big 5 model by itself is free-floating since you’re only getting percentages for each of the five elements. the Global 5 (aka SLOAN) is a way for you to give a name those results, in letters. there is no “SLOAN” test since it’s just a naming system that uses the results from the Big 5.

it’s explained here but i’ll explain it in simpler terms:

Reserved or Social = Big 5 Extraversion score

Calm or Limbic = Big 5 Neuroticism score

Unstructured or Organized = Big 5 Conscientiousness score

Egocentric or Accomodating = Big 5 Agreeableness score

Noncurious or Inquitisive = Big 5 Openness to Experience score

it’s a sliding scale where 50% marks the tipping point between which letter you use. the notation also changes depending on the strength of each element.

Uppercase letter = Strong tendency

Lowercase letter = Mild tendency

x = In between, on average

|?| = Your strongest element

you need to think of these results as like a statistical distribution. 50% is the average, where going closer to 0% or 100% is more extreme on either end.

there’s no hard rule for what percentile encompasses “strong”, “mild”, and “average”, but personally i’d divide it like such:

0–24 or 76–100 percentile would be strong tendency, use uppercase letter.

25–40 or 60–75 percentile would be mild tendency, use lowercase letter.

41–59 percentile would be average tendency, use “x”.

let’s use my results as an example.

on the IPIP-300 my Big Five dimensions were:

Extraversion - 15th percentile

Agreeableness - 78th percentile

Concientiousness - 64th percentile

Neuroticism - 16th percentile

Openness - 60th percentile

Extraversion is strongly low (15th percentile), so i would use uppercase R for Reserved. it is also my strongest element in either direction so i will put vertical bars around it: |R|

Neuroticism is also strongly low (16th percentile), so i would use uppercase C for Calm: |R|C

Conscientiousness is mildly high (64th percentile), so i would use lowercase O for Organized: |R|Co

Agreeableness is strongly high (78th percentile), so i would use uppercase A for Accomodating: |R|CoA

Openness to Experience is mildly high (60th percentile), so i would use lowercase I for Inquitisive: |R|CoAi

my Global 5 type is RCOAI, with the notation |R|CoAi giving more information about the relative strength of each dimension.

now that’s not to say there aren’t correlations to MBTI types but correlation does not equal causation and there absolutely are exceptions to the norm. also the Big 5 is NOT testing for cognitive functions, which is what the mbti actually uses (even if hidden behind a 4-letter code).

you can see by this, i am a typical INFJ according to these semi-correlations but just barely—had my Openness scored just a point lower i’d be on the fence between RCOAI and RCOAN (the latter of which is correlated with ISFJ). in mbti though, ISFJs have a completely different perceiving axis than me: they use the Ne/Si axis and lead with dominant Si.

that said, i’ll tell you how your ““type”” is calculated on 16personalities.

how 16personalities calculates type

i’ve consistently gotten INFJ-A on 16personalities but that’s because i’m RCOAI. i am indeed an actual INFJ in the NiFeTiSe sense as well, verified by understanding the cognitive functions, and it is merely coincidence.

this is how they score it. ready?

I / E = Extraversion score

S / N = Openness score

T / F = Agreeableness score

P / J = Conscientiousness score

-A / -T = Neuroticism score (tacked on because of course the fuck it is)

so you wanna know how and why so many INFPs (actually FiNeSiTes) test as “INFJs” on that site? it’s when they score high on Conscientiousness (so in the Global 5, instead of Unorganized its Organized).

RxUAI is normally correlated with INFP but RxOAI is normally correlated with INFJ.

that means there is just one dimension that separates the INFP and INFJ result on 16personalities. and the implications are fucking awful. using the MBTI 4 letter dichotomy for a Big 5 test is such a bad move i cant even BEGIN to describe why, but that’s partially why i made this blog in the first place— to rip apart typology myths that are fundamentally wrong or flawed while also offering explanations as to why (and hopefully getting more people to understand it correctly and pass on valid information).

in reality, INFJs and INFPs share absolutely nothing in common functions-wise.

an INFJ’s dominant-inferior axis is one of perceiving (Ni/Se) and their balanced auxiliary-tertiary axis is their judging (Fe/Ti). Ni(Fe-Ti)Se.

an INFP’s dominant-inferior axis is one of judging (Fi/Te) and their balanced auxiliary-tertiary axis is their perceiving (Ne/Si). Fi(Ne-Si)Te.

so what is MBTI then actually??

the MBTI and cognitive functions are not setting out to describe personality traits. they are describing patterns of cognition as feedback between two parts of the same process (the function axes), like systole and diastole of the heart, or a walk cycle with your two legs driving you forward. cognitive functions are not concerned with boxing people in to define motivations or disposition, it just tells how information is assembled and processed in the psyche. this has real value in examining and analyzing why and how people process and discern information the way they do, and how to understand oneself and each other in a deeper way using shared descriptors for how we perceive and judge information. it is especially helpful for me as someone who perceives things deeply but has trouble making sense of those experiences without the semantics to understand and to articulate them. it’s not a tool to box you in, but a tool to explain what already exists. it’s a lot more flexible than you think.

one’s cognition can be split into two divisions: Perception and Judging.

the role of Perception in the psyche is the incidental synthesis of information without discriminating, and the role of Judgment is to differentiate between information sources and organize that information into definite concepts and discrete ideas. this article explains it well.

everyone does both. however, people will have more of a focus on either Judgement or Perception, finding the most compelling sense of “truth” from one of these divisions over the other.

to an INFJ, an ultimate sense of truth is found in their Perception processes (Ni and Se), and their Judgement processes (Fe and Ti) serve to rationalize/make sense of those perceptions.

to an INFP, an ultimate sense of truth is found in their Judgement processes (Fi and Te), and their Perception processes (Ne and Si) serve to contextualize those judgements.

that is why the axes (the dominant-inferior and auxiliary-tertiary) are formed, and why the placement of these functions matter, because they will manifest differently depending on where they are and what “role” they play in the functional stack.