#it's 2am and im overthinking

[fac-romam-iterum-magna]

I still dont know what to do about nation made of differents peoples who played a huge part of their history and as which one they started.

For exemple france

Roman gaul is what you could consider as france: latinized celts

Except there is a important part of our history: the franks, a germanic people from northern europe. They are considered the foundator of the nation and basically for all of the middle age we were called franks (thats why the country is named like that btw). French people consider themselves as latin and heir of the gaulics

BUT the franks are the one who created the state. All of our dynasty originate from them and our most important rulers were germanic (ex: carolus magnus). Despite assimilating themselves to locals, it was said nobility was frank unlike the peasantry.

Or a another exemple: north african/levantine nations

The pre-islamic history is there. Rome had a role in the determination of their border, like ifriqia for tunisia. There is also the contribution of indigenous population, in algeria a berber queen fought the arab, egypt was copt majority until the 10/11th century, syria was a craddle of early christianism...etc

BUT arab identity and islam is a huge part of the peoples identities too. Big enough so almost everyone speak arabic, is muslim (more or less practicant) and identify as arab. These countries, without arabs conquest would not exist as we know them.

So does they start as the formative one or the one who shaped their history ?

[avyanna-grace]

I miss the days

When I felt home in my own body

When breathing was easy

When thoughts were not crowded

When the voices were softer

When everything was easy

or was it ever?

If it were illusion

Nothing but ignorance

I miss the ignorance

For indeed,

Ignorance is bliss.

-AG

[towriteistocry]

guys i feel like the proper attitude of navigating life is choosing a character or characters from a show you love or relates to your life and living that way, it’s not necessarily smart but i’m gonna try and adapt jen lindleys way of living and her vast vocabulary into my life and summer roberts style into my life especially going back to school.

[sugary-spider]

Its getting sickening and tiring over the fact bugsnax is my hugest hyperfixations I ever have but im also scared one day imma just not like it anymore, even tho I have so many ocs from it

[hopkei]

.

[watcher-wilds]

What if I just started wearing a pronoun pin to work out of the blue. What if I dressed up in trans colors every day for a week. What if I just started decorating my office with queer shit. What if I got a girlfriend just to bring her to work functions.

[beatheprincess]

boo stoopid intrusive thoughts n impulsivity..why me tho? I don't wanna call out n declare this mental illness w/o proper diagnosis but ik smth is wrong, spent mostly all day with fam which is smth I love n I want more good times then bad but I kept thinking "what if I'm being used" or "secretly hated" esp by my middle brother..he has teenage mood swings often and use to ask me for alot of stuff till I enlisted that boundary down n learned to say no so glad it doesn't happen anymore but rare times he'll ask me to take pics for his insta which I don't mind doing but in my mind it's like I'm being manipulated by my own brain ?!? Like if anyone asks me for a favor i feel like they're using me even if that's not the case or if I'm not involved in smth for the moment, I'm hated. I'm alot to dealt with emotionally and have a bad habit of over exaggerating things too :/ my family aren't assholes, yea they aren't perfect but I cant wear my heart on my sleeve too much n I'm trying not to be overly sensitive, I do feel solace in the fact I have a blog to express these kinds of thoughts n distract myself!! So thank you for listeningggg☆☆

[frostbitesjc]

.

[honeynutbones]

i feel like i overuse the phrase “but still” in normal conversation

it’s not like it comes up in every other sentence, but i still use it a fair bit and idk what qualifies as using a phrase “too much”

[gingeraleluke]

congrats on 2k!! Heartbeat: vinnie hacker; easy by camila cabello <3

𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘆

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: vinnie hacker x fem!influencer reader

𝘀𝘆𝗻𝗼𝗽𝘀𝗶𝘀: vinnie’s girlfriend thinks she’s too difficult to love.

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: arguing, angsty/fluff, vinnie being aggravated, insecure reader, and uh….smutty

𝗔/𝗡: hi guys. i’ve been away from tumblr for a while and apologize for the hiatus. i’ve been dealing with a lot and have been somewhat open about it on here so i appreciate all of the love you guys have been sending me. i didn’t forget about you, im just healing. i love you guys and hope you enjoy <3

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

you tell me that i’m complicated

and that might be an understatement

anything else?

vinnie had his eyes glued to his phone, not noticing how his girlfriends jaw was clenched and her arms were crossed, closing herself off. “i just don’t understand why you didn’t tell me earlier, this is just gonna be way more complicated now.”

“because i didn’t feel that way earlier!” the baggy shirt she wore hung off her bare shoulders, as she internally reconsidered her decision. it was difficult for her to separate her feelings with her wants in times like these.

vinnie wouldn’t fight back, but she could tell he was annoyed as he scrummaged through his social media and deleted the photos and videos. “i don’t get why this is so complicated for you.”

complicated.

a word that she had heard more times than she’d like to admit, described perfectly for her. her biggest fear and most agonizing worry was that she would be just that— too complicated— and hearing the word leave her boyfriends lips, she felt that it was all coming to fruition.

“i wasn’t trying to be complicated, i just…i didn’t wanna keep it from you.” she apologized, feeling herself become sick to her stomach with guilt.

you tell me that i’m indecisive

fickle but i try to hide it

anything else?

“i don’t get what—why are you changing your mind all of a sudden? what happened? i thought you were asleep, it’s like…2am..” he checked the clock dropping his phone on the couch. “well it’s all deleted now. i’m sorry if i made you uncomfortable.” he both his hands on the back of his head while looking up at the ceiling.

“you didn’t! i promise, you didn’t, i just… don’t wanna exist on the internet right now.”

vinnie snapped his head back, leering at the girl, “see, now that makes no sense.”

“what?” she whined, trying not to get him upset as he made his way over to her.

“you can’t just delete yourself from the internet whenever you feel like it, baby. you’re an influencer—“

“yeah, who barely shows her face on camera! i don’t make thirst traps and when i do, they stay in the drafts.”

“that’s my problem?”

“no! i just, i didn’t like the pictures, okay?”

“but you liked them when you first saw them, so why wait fifteen hours to say something? where is this indecision coming from?”

“no where! i always had it, i just…i don’t know.”

you tell me that i overthink

till i ruin a good thing

anything else?

“yeah, well, i do know. you’re overthinking just like you always do. you can never just let something be good, you always have to ruin it for yourself.” vinnie argued, shoving by her and walking down the stairs.

y/n stood there, complacent. she hated arguing with him and she felt like even more of a burden now.

why couldn’t you just leave it be?

maybe you didn’t even look that bad in those videos..

maybe everything he’s saying is right.

he suppressed a sigh when he heard his girlfriends footsteps following after him, hoping that she would just drop it and leave it be. he kissed his teeth, turning towards the kitchen while shaking his head slightly, his eyes rolling backwards in annoyance.

“you’re right.”

vinnie scoffed, keeping his back turned while his hands continued peeling a banana. “i know i’m right.”

“i don’t know why i do it. i don’t mean to, i just… am hard on myself, and you’re right, i should have said something sooner and i’ll make a post about it if people ask questions, i just..i didn’t feel…”

“what? you didn’t feel what?” an annoyed vinnie dropped the banana on the counter and turned around, not expecting to see the girl he loved so upset. he couldn’t tell from her voice that she was crying, but there she was; lips pouty and eyelids low while tears slid down her cheeks. his face immediately softened.

“sometimes i don’t feel like a good person.” her bottom lip quivered and her feet were planted into the floor. she held her hands together, clasped, like she was trying to apologize and she’d bat her lashes while looking up at the kitchen light, as to dry them.

vinnie’s heart broke.

“i know i am, but…i feel like other people deserve my life more than i do..” she couldn’t hold the tears back anymore and gasped slightly before continuing. “i-i know it’s like..stupid, but, i just feel guilty all the time like i’m not doing enough or not grateful enough and i don’t know why, i don’t know, i wish i did, i swear, vinnie.” she wiped her cheek with the back of her hand before letting her arms fall and a sign escape her lips. “i just..have a voice in the back of my head that constantly tells me i’m too much to handle and that i’m not built for this. for you.”

there it was. that rush of blood that shot to her head every time she spoke up to vinnie. she wasn’t sure what it was, maybe something from her past or maybe she was just wired this way, but she was constantly terrified of upsetting him. arguments weren’t her thing and made her physically sick if she even thought about it, but vinnie was the most stubborn person she had ever met so once you start the conversation with him, there is no stopping it.

“hey..” he cooed, walking around the kitchen island and making his way towards her. he leaned down to meet her level and softly pressed her head against his chest, wrapping his arms around her. he could feel her cry quietly in his arms. “shh, baby. it’s okay,” he whispered, leaving deep kisses on the top of her head.

you tell me that you’d rather fight

than spend a single peaceful night

with somebody else

“i’m sorry, okay? i was a little harsh, it’s not a big deal. please don’t cry about it.” he slowly rocked her back and forth, keeping her trapped in his arms. she put her hands up against his chest, trying to push and snake her way out of his grasp.

“hey—“

“no, vinnie. it’s me, you’re right, okay? i don’t wanna argue or talk about it anymore, i’m just gonna go to bed.” she turned around, clearly still upset. vinnie moved his hand up her arm, lightly tugging her back to him.

“no, baby. stop. we aren’t arguing anymore, i just wanna talk about it.”

“no, vin, because then we will argue and you’ll get mad at me—“

“baby, listen!“ he put his hands on both sides of her face, making her look at him. “what’s going on with you?”

“nothing, vin! i just wanna leave you be—“

“but i don’t want you to leave me be. i want you, only you, whether you’re upset or not. i’d rather argue with you than spend a night with somebody else.”

“yeah, i find that hard to believe.” y/n scoffed, shaking her head.

you really, really know me

the future and the old me

all the mazes and the madness in my mind

“stop, okay? let’s-let’s just go sit down in bed and we can talk it through and figure something out, i don’t want you to go to bed upset.” vinnie trailed behind the girl as she began walking away.

“i don’t want to, vinnie. i’m tired.” she complained, groaning internally, and there it was; that trite excuse that would continuously fall from her lips whenever they bickered late at night.

“no, okay? you always say that, i’m not stupid. we are talking and then you can go to bed. i’m not ending this here.” he watched her, his hand resting on the side of the door frame while she dropped onto their bed, on top of the covers.

“just end it here.”

“no.”

“why not?” she could hear his voice come closer as he sat beside her, her back facing him.

“because, i know you and i know that you will stay up all night overthinking and then you’ll wake up sad in the morning with a migraine and act like everything is okay when it’s not and i’m fucking sick of doing that, i want you comfortable.”

he knows me so well.

you really, really love me

you know me and you love me

and it’s the kind of thing i always hoped to find

y/n shifted over so she was facing him, but kept her eyelids low and fixated on the bed. “hey.”

“mm”

“look at me.” vinnie’s voice was soft and caring in a way that made her entire being almost dissipate in thin air from it’s adorableness. he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear while she gained the courage to look up at him. she couldn’t help the small smile that appeared when she saw his face.

“now i’m gonna say this once, and i want you to listen, okay? because i’m not good with words and i tend to be an idiot sometimes.” y/n chuckled and nodded, waiting for him to finish.

“i love you. like, i really fucking love you, okay? i don’t care what happens or what anyone things, all i care about is us and i want us to be happy and i’ll do whatever i need to make that happen, okay? you’re mine. i don’t care about whatever it is that you freak out about in your head, okay? that’s not real. my love for you is real. you got that?”

always thought i was hard to love till you made it seem so easy, seem so easy

y/n nodded, leaning forwards and clinging onto him. “i know. i know and i love you more vinnie, i swear i do.”

“are you okay now? do you feel any better?”

“yes, actually. you make me feel really safe, vin. i hope you know that.” vinnie grabbed the side of her face and connected his lips to hers, cutting off any other words from leaving her lips. the kiss felt loving, yet desperate.

“um..are you gonna go to bed?” their mouths were just mere inches apart and his breathing was borderline heavy.

“not for a little while, i was just gonna edit some stuff, why?”

“because you um…you look really fucking hot when you wear my clothes and it’s kinda turning me on.”

“oh, really?”

touch me till i find myself never fearing

tell me with your hands that you’re never leaving

“yeah, is that bad? i know you were literally just crying a second ago so—yeah, that’s bad. fuck—i’m sorry—“

“no! it’s not bad.” she sat up and wrapped one leg around his torso, straddling him. she was barely even touching him, and yet she could feel him tense up and his breath hitch. “seeing how much you care about me was kinda turning me on too..”

“oh, really?”

“mmhmm.”

“good to know.” he smirked, stopping once he felt her body weight move forwards, his hard on making it hard for him to keep it together. “god, shit. look, baby, can i please just fucking worship you for a second. we don’t even have to fuck, i just wanna see you naked, please.”

“i’m not gonna stop you—“ she was cut off by him sitting up and pushing her down, her back pressed against the bed and her hair dangling down the side.

“mm, you know how badly i wish you didn’t hate yourself? like, fuck, i’m looking at you right now and i can’t even think straight and that’s not because i’m turned on, that’s how it is for me all the time when i see you, and i’ll do whatever i can to make you see yourself like that.” he scooted towards the other side of the bed, grabbing her ankles. “move you over for me.” he mumbled, “come closer? there you go.”

“you left your phone and banana in the kitchen.”

“does it look like i care?” vinnie chuckled, towering over her and slowly creeping the hem of her shirt up, exposing her belly button. “i’ve got all i need right here.”

i never liked my crooked teeth

you tell me they’re your favorite thing

anything else?

his hands were cold and the feeling of them on her hips was driving her crazy. “mm, so pretty. what a pretty girl.” while the sight of her panties was arousing enough, he moved up back to her face, sitting up between her legs. “can i have you do something for me, baby?”

“what?”

“you think you can suck my fingers while i kiss on your neck?”

“i’d love to.” she practically moaned, smiling while he lightly shoved his digits into her mouth before arching his back and letting his head drop between her neck, watching her suck on his fingers while kissing on her jawline.

“pretty fucking lips, pretty fucking teeth, pretty fucking face.” he reached a hand up to pet back her hair as she continued sucking, his lips making there way down her neck. “god, let me see your tits..” he muttered, ripping his shirt up and over her head and removing his fingers.

“so pretty. so pretty when you’re naked like this.” vinnie took her neck into his hand, feverishly kissing her. “good job, so good.”

she whimpered a reply while he moved his hands down the sides of her body. he left small kisses down her stomach while keeping eye contact with her, his messy hair covering his eyebrows.

stretch marks all around my thighs

kiss em till i change my mind

about everything else

“mmm, vinnie please—“

“be patient.”

y/n jolted at the sudden feeling of his lips against her inner thighs, leaving sloppy kisses. “fuck, vinnie.”

“mm, pretty stretch marks. god, they are so fucking sexy.” she involuntarily tangled her fingers into his hair, watching as he kissed over her thighs. “fucking love you. never leaving you, ever.”

“please don’t.”

he looked up at his girlfriend, rising back up to meet her face. “never will.”

he mumbled into her lips, leaving a few more kisses on her neck, before traveling back down between her thighs.

[imraespace]

TODAY IS MY LAST DAY OF EXAMS YAYY that means I'm GONNA START POSTING AGAIN YIPPEEE

anyways for those who care abt me I'm gonna vent okay😞😕

yk I'm open with mostly whatever I do bc I like to and I was open with my exams mark as well so ik I did worse than last time ALL BC I DECIDED TO GET ALL DEPRESSED BC OF THIS "friend" i have. girl made me cry sm I even went in the bathroom to bathe just to cry HELP I even cried this morning WHILE DOING MY HAIR😒 my mommy sent me messages to help me be not be upset n stuff before my exams BUT IT DIDNT HELP(she just made me cry even more) I forgot most of what I stayed up at 2am revising and even revised the week before exams EVERYTHING WENT DOWN THE DRAIN bc of this girl but I don't wanna feel sad anymore she made me feel like I was a bad person when IK IM NOT just I overthink alot yk that's all I wanted to say🙁

anyways I might start back posting tomorrow or something idk

[honeekyuu]

HONEEEEE SELF SHIP FRIDAY WHO CHEERED

i love these prompts so im asking a lot sorry not sorry happy self ship friday

pre: 2, 6

general: 8, 9

love: 2, 10

domestic: 2, 8

MOLLYYYYYY LETS FUCKING GO IT'S SUNA DAY (it's always fking suna day lets be fucking real)

self ship questions!

pre 2: What was their first impression of each other?

suna and i met on move in day first year,,, he was screaming "if you break my shit ill fuck your mom" down the hall at atsumu as i coming around the corner with my cart of plants. we made eye contact and i said "my mom??" i immediately thought he was funny but he avoided me for like a week bc he was embarrassed. i had to keep making 'your mom' jokes until he cracked because he was being weird

pre 6: What was their "flirting stage" like?

looking back im like pretty solidly convinced the flirting stage started in like second year, but im just an idiot and didnt realize it until our situationship started a year later. lots of us staying up until 2am playing mario kart alone in the dorm lounge or in his room. lots of him texting me memes and tiktoks and taking random pictures of me and sending them to me when he'd see me on the quad but i didnt see him,,,, making faces at each other across classrooms,,, lots of his hands brushing thighs and elbows and me hugging him goodnight,,,, wow i was a stupid fuck back then lmao

general 8: Who takes the lead in social situations? How are they around each other's friends?

me. me me me. 100% me. we are both introverts but hes the WORSE introvert. people think hes a standoffish rude terrible fuck because he cant keep eye contact to save his life and is always on his phone in social situations. when he first met my friends i had to do major damage control but once they got to know him they realized hes just shy and now they make fun of him for it. "oh i'd ask suna but i dont think hes on this plane of existence rn" "suna i need your opinion and i need you to speak it in words please" ,, that kind of shit. his friends are the miyans and we were all in the same dorm for two years so there were no issues getting to know them lmao

general 9: Who gets jealous easier?

i was gonna say me but it's him. i get jealous SUUUUPER easily but more often it's like,, insecurity not jealousy lol. 90% of the time it's me being insane ab smth that isn't even happening and him being like "wow, youre being insane ab smth that isnt even happening!". but any time literally any guy he doesnt know tries to say smth to me, suna appears like a cryptid and stands there until the interaction is over. brother could be asking me for directions and a cold chill will pass over me as my bf emerges from the ether to linger behind me.

love 2: What are their primary love languages?

mine is words of affirmation and quality time without fail. i NEED this man to tell me he loves me because every four seconds im like "so you dont like me??" and he just sighs in exhaustion. and i feel like,,, even in the fwb stage,,,, if i went too long without seeing him i would get really insecure,,, but also HIS love languages are physical touch and quality time, so we never went more than like a DAY without seeing each other lmao. and hes a manhandler,,, brother just manhandles me when he gets clingy and im left to deal w it, he has no fucking clue how strong he is

love 10: What do they like best about each other?

i like how reliable he is. he is so steadfast and unwavering about basically everything, to the point where, if im feeling insecure, hes like "literally why would you ever think that? you already know how i feel, it has not changed once". it's a little frustrating bc hes stubborn, but also i feel like him being reliable as a fucking rock helps build my confidence to do things out of my comfort zone with him. and i think he likes that im fucking insane and overthink/overshare so open about my feelings!! hes really bad at expressing himself vocally, but hes gotten a LOT better at it in the years we've known each other and now hes basically perfect at just speaking his truth lmao. i think it's bc i talk so much ab my feelings that hes figured out how to do it too

domestic 2: If they get married, who proposes, and how do they do it? Would they change their surnames?

ohhh we're not married, but hes said out loud in extremely blunt terms that he'll be the one who proposes. i asked if he wanted me to propose and he said "HEEEEELLLLLL NO!!!!! I WANNA DO IT" so,,,, ig he's doing it ?? i dont think ill take his name though, he says he likes my name the way it is.

domestic 8: Who kills the bugs in the house?

him. he does. him. i would give the spiders the house if they asked for it.

[she-ismysun-archive]

god bless im free

i have watched the premiere and holy shit. to say IM NOT OK is the understatement of the century 🫣 spoiler warning for the rest of the post

the rookie 6x01 ⚠️Spoilers⚠️

im gonna need to digest and reblog my reaction in the morning (because its almost 2am)

initial thoughts:

i just finished watching season 5 but i still can't believe how much happened

WOW ok we're jumping straight back into the action

this robbery is so confusing and hard to follow??? writing feels a little bit of a mess right now

ok damn they shot one of their own - who the hell is behind this?

OH OK? HUGE time skip AND aaron is fine

chenford dialogue and conflict feels so OOC??

like I KNOW they've been saying that their relationship is seriously put through the test but I feel like there's no world they argue like this. I dunno man, I need to rewatch a couple times to wrap my head around it

sunshine lucy this sunshine lucy that, YES she has the tendency to overthink and ramble but taking it out on Tim?? Seriously? No way she would :(

BUT THEN ALSO HIS DIALOGUE TOWARDS HER? wraaagh. I need to hear other people's thoughts on this too.

I know this conflict is resolved QUICKLY because we've already seen the clips and promo for 6x02

thank god for Aaron coming in clutch at the end

feeling SO bad for Aaron because he has no idea the trauma and feelings surrounding Jackson. Grey already lost one son, he can't afford to risk going through that again

i will revisit this in the morning but these are my initial thoughts

[mushiewrites]

OKOK so maybe lee!dream and ler George and sapnap? dream being a tired, overworking mess, AND on top of that having doubts about how his friends see him as, their friendship, if he’s weird or something, just being an overthinking puddle okay. And then the boys catch on and soft tickles ensue, lots of praises and compliments and reassurances :(. Dreams worst spot may be his tummy, but I HC that it’s also a melt spot if tickled correctly !! Pillow underneath his tummy and the softest kisses and the lightest trailing fingers and soft nibbling on the hips and sides until he’s just a mushy, giggling and happy puddle :3!!

hello hello!

anon (not so anon though :3)...........this killed me. i know you saw my post but im gonna say it again for those who didn't - i LITERALLY sat up in my bed at around 2am or something and immediately had to start writing this. it's just.........too good 🫠

i had to be a tiiiiiiny bit mean bc it's dream and he's too precious to not be, but this is fluff fluff fluuuuuuffy tks 🥺

you can find the fic here!

[chereserene]

Fucking 2am and im crying. Overthinking sucks potangina

[bobatealie-archived]

Dw elie,, failgirl moments aren't that difficult to get over, a cup of coffee and overthinking for 3 hours n ur good to go!! /from experience!! im doing ok,, but its uh 2am n a weekday so i should sleep but i am thinking about chainsaw man so uh yeah

HWKJSKDJFS i cld go for coffee maybe actually [i only drink the like. coffee that doesn't taste like coffee, all sugar / caramel nd cream LMAO] also i think u mayhaps sleep . . . <- stays up late way too often on school nights