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it's very funny to me that when Mash got super into characters manipulating their friends to prank them as subplot fodder, Hawkeye's like the only one who never gets a plot like this.
Hawkeye, champion gaslighter and manipulator extraordinaire of the first three seasons, a dude who invented a whole person to defraud the military out of thousands of dollars, a dude who gaslighted a colonel into early retirement, and a dude who took out two(2) healthy appendixes, among plenty of other schemes, never uses his frankly legendary skills for evil
you get plots where Charles or BJ pit their friends against each other for ther own amusement, where the entire rest of the cast works together to drive Hawkeye into a fit of paranoia, Potter terrorizing our faves with a grand manipulation scheme in one episode, and plenty more where BJ works to turn the camp against Hawkeye for fun, but I can't think of a single subplot where Hawkeye does anything similar to anyone who isn't an antagonist.
he has a few revenge pranks on BJ in the episode tags, but these are basic straightforward ones that don't involve gaslighting or manipulation, just shaving half his moustache or letting him wake up naked in the nurse's tent. His pranks in April Fools were straightforward and boring as far as I remember without rewatching. Bombshells could almost qualify except convincing everyone Marilyn Monroe was coming was a total accident, Hawkeye just made an offhand joke that snowballed.
I think the closest he comes is the revenge prank he, BJ, and Margaret pull on Charles in An Eye For a Tooth to make him feel guilty, and he's only one of three people involved in that.
And lol I think the reason is because later Mash prefers Hawkeye to be a pathetic victim rather than an impressive mastermind, but it sure has the accidental side effect of making him come across as a much better friend. Like we know he has the chops to make BJ a social pariah in revenge after an episode like Bottom's Up, but he'll stick to something lighthearted because he reserves those schemes for psychiatrists trying to section him, or colonels trying to get people killed, or Frank.
#mash#marley on mash#it's a shame because i love when hawkeye is mean to his friends#(like the one or two times it has ever happened lol)#i'd be all for an episode where he psychologically terrorizes his friends because he's bored and his usual outlet frank is gone#but alas everyone else gets to psychologically terrorize him#and he gets glorified bucket-over-the-door style pranks 😔#hawkeye mash
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what is that pet name you have sid calling hawk? i can't seem to find a translation anywhere and i'm curious!
Hello! :D This is a headcanon that my friend @siriusnebulae came up with for Sidney, and I was so in love with it that I adopted it immediately.
Zissele is a Yiddish term of endearment that essentially means "sweetie," with the -ele suffix making it diminutive. This is why it's more "sweetie" than "sweetheart."
That suffix, -ele, is one that's often attached to names to demonstrate that this is a person you are very close and endeared to. So you take Hawk, add the diminutive suffix, and you get Hawkele!
Another one we have comes from me being like "Man, it's a shame that 'kitten' has become such a meme of a nickname, because Hawk is so cat-like that I bet he would honestly be smug and preening if someone called him that. I just can't bring myself to use it seriously when writing him." So Sirius was like, "Well, what about ketzeleh? Yiddish for kitten." And I was immediately sold.
Notably these headcanons all really came about because Sirius had been looking for a term of endearment Sidney might use for Hawkeye and came across the word 'feygele,' which means 'little bird' and was used frequently as a fond name for young girls. Gradually, it became a disparaging term for gay men, but it subsequently began to be reclaimed and defanged. I believe we both headcanon Sidney as a gay man, so there was a lot of power in the thought of him not only reclaiming that term but introducing it to Hawkeye, Captain Sodom himself, who then takes it with incredible glee and relish, and it becomes quite a fond and sometimes teasing endearment from Sidney.
We both headcanon Hawkeye as having a Jewish mother—he uses Yiddish so frequently in the course of the series and shows what appears to be quite a reverence when witnessing the bris in S3's Life With Father—and Sidney is Jewish as well, so letting them have that connection was really meaningful for us. I especially headcanon that Hawk had no other connections to his Jewish heritage when his mother passed away. He recognizes the fondness in Sidney's voice when he first uses those endearments and feels an instant warmth as he realizes they're Yiddish, but he doesn't know what they mean until Sidney tells him. It becomes a moment of being seen between them both, and Hawkeye especially gets to really feel that sense of belonging that he sometimes has been missing when it comes to his heritage.
So yeah, now I'm hooked on that headcanon! Those are Sidney's Special Names for Hawkeye, so I am incapable of writing any other characters utilizing them fhdkdfs
#i got very rambly here but it's because i love them please forgive me#i just love when characters have really lovely reasons to have their Special Nicknames for each other#especially when they get to be unique to those characters' story and ship#my ramblings#headcanons#my writing commentary#sidhawk
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Isn't Trapper's nickname a euphemism for rape. I think that could have been explored more in depth in the show. And Hawkeye's hookups aren't always the paragon of enthusiastic consent either.
CW for rape mention and sexual harassment
I haven't read the MASH book and I'm not sure how it is represented there but in the movie:
John McIntyre, Trapper John. Only man to find fulfillment in a Boston Maine Railway, in the- in the ladies can! Conductor opened the door, the girl looked out and yelled "Oh, he trapped me! Omigod, he trapped me!"
Unless I'm missing some historical context for the term that's used, "trapped" I don't know that this is rape. With that said, Trapper (and Hawkeye) in the film sexually harass Margaret, no two ways about it, so I can't say it would be OOC for movie Trapper. I'm not sure where the word "rape" came from in this instance but in my opinion, it's ambiguous. I'm totally open to being wrong if there is concrete evidence.
The incident is retconned out of the show, along with much of the cruelty they subject Margaret to - the primary target of public humiliation and shaming in the show Frank Burns (who in the movie is Margaret's only ally and exits the movie halfway through) and with how much character development Margaret gets, to me it seems a deliberate choice to reduce the volume and severity of abuse her movie counterpart endures. You would never catch movie HawkTrap helping Margaret sober up (Hot Lips and Empty Arms) or hide a body (Iron Guts Kelly). In Bombshells Trapper pointedly respects Margaret's "no", that's the crux of the whole episode. He also doesn't seem to enjoy or return her advances when she's blackout drunk in Hot Lips and Empty Arms.
Personally I don't see the value in this stuff being explored in the show. It's sort of addressed in Hepatitis when Margaret asks for "respect" and Hawkeye folds.
I'd actually argue there's more canonical proof from the show of Hawkeye not respecting consent than Trapper. They both kiss Margaret without her consent, Trapper in Rainbow Bridge and For the Good of the Outfit, Hawkeye in Dear Dad and There's Nothing Like a Nurse. I can't think of any more wrt to Trapper but Hawkeye kisses Frank once on the lips without his consent (twice if he caught him in For the Good of the Outfit - it's still sexual harassment even if he didn't), in Ceasefire Hawkeye seems to have promised himself romantically to multiple women, deceiving them so they'll sleep with him.
(I just wanna note that the Ceasefire example seems like a misstep - he's never actually shown misrepresenting himself that way, he's normally pretty up front with his casual hookups, and it never happens again. Seems like a bad subplot rather than something I'd call a recurring flaw)
I know we all love the 'pegging scene' in Carry on Hawkeye but making a big show of dropping your pants so your female coworker can give you a shot is harassment, he does it because he knows it'll make Margaret uncomfortable and he does the same thing again in Hepatitis when she calls him out.
But honestly I can't think of a single example other than Ceasefire where his hookups aren't enthusiastic on both sides. Like part of my problem with the Ceasefire example is that Margie Cutler is one of the women who thinks she'll be marrying Hawkeye after the war she flirts with both Trapper and Hawkeye in Requiem for a Lightweight, pimps out Hawkeye to her friend in Edwina like... girl you knew what this was??? So prior to that episode, she seemed to be pretty enthusiastic.
And honestly I push back pretty hard against the hookups being seen as unenthusiastic. There's plenty of nurses who happily make out with Trapper and I don't believe they're all unaware that he's married, he talks about it openly in OR - yeah that's infidelity and it's morally wrong but it doesn't mean there aren't two consenting adults.
Similarly I have a hard time believing that the nurses don't see Hawkeye with a different girl on his arm every week, they know what they're getting. One of the things I like a lot about early MASH is the sex is enjoyed by all - I value positive portrayals of female sexual pleasure in the 70s over fidelity to offscreen wives because of the historical context. Hollywood is still terrified of portraying cunnilingus and Hawkeye is constantly shaving for his dates. Could it be because he's very enthusiastically kissing women? I suppose. But knowing this show and Alan Alda in general, I dunno.
MASH did try to explore misogyny, it responded to early criticism and dropped some of flourishes it relied upon. That's good and bad imo. It's nice to not hear so many 'honeys' and 'sweethearts' in the OR, but I miss the casual fucking and sucking when it goes away.
We have Inga which gives us a very OOC Hawkeye imo being put in his place. Hepatitis which muddies about with some comparison of Hawkeye to Margaret's in-laws but is ultimately a sweet moment for Hawk-Margaret (really he comes to respect her over a longer period of time but I'll take it). Who Knew where Hawkeye whines about sleeping with Millie in lieu of acknowledging her interiority as though these are two entirely mutually exclusive things - a swing and miss imo. But then you have season 10's Cementing Relationships where Margaret spends the whole episode being sexually harassed and it's played completely for laughs - just because it isn't Hawkeye doing it anymore doesn't mean it's not wrong.
I do appreciate the attempts at addressing misogyny, even though I think it led to some big missteps, but I don't personally feel I missed out on anything by there not being an in-depth exploration of sex and consent. Sex and romance aren't really given much focus in general, so I don't think it would make sense to explore it very deeply.
#replies#re: mash#if you read all of this... good job#rape mention#harassment cw#glad i watched the movie so that i could actually reference it because you can really see the choices they made#made me appreciate the show more
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Edit: Did you know guys - I actually wrote this horrible thing: here’s the first chapter.
I know that my jokes are painfully unfunny, but there’s no stopping me when I get a stupid idea like this. I tried to make it look more cartoony to save me some time - didn’t work, still spent 3 days drawing it.
For anyone with sense of humor as broken as mine, here is my pitch of an FMA School AU - 80s teen movie style (because that’s all I watched as a kid):
Students: Ed Elric - the angsty, edgy kid who draws horns and pentagrams on school desks, never wears proper uniform and gets into fights with Principal Mustang, about to discover a great conspiracy Al Elric - diligent student who skipped one year, generally tries to follow rules but constantly gets involved in his brother’s trouble Winry - secretly reads automail catalogues in class, teachers pressure her to go to a university, but she’d like to work in a workshop instead Lin Yao & Lan Fan - exchange students from a far away land, they seem nice, but mysterious and keep to themselves - they seem to have a secret agenda... Also, they keep stealing other people’s food Paninya - Winry’s best friend and a trouble child, who’s had run ins with the law in the past Envy - the emo kid who hates everyone and is prone to mean pranks, Ed’s sworn enemy Younger kids in the lower grades: Mei Chang (also exchange student), Selim Bradley (mayor’s son), Nina Tucker (I had to guys, don’t hate me) Staff: Roy Mustang - the principal, who wants to reign in the rebelious students by all means possible, dreams of becoming the mayor Riza Hawkeye - principal’s secretary and assistant, the only person taking care of all the paperwork and school records Olivier Armstrong - the ruthless PE teacher, who tortures her students with insane routines, her motto is ‘survival of the fittest‘ Alex Armstrong - the art teacher, who loves all his students and seems oblivious to the fact that they all hate him Solf J. Kimblee - crazy science teacher, who blows things up and endangers students on regular basis, yet always gets away with it - no one knows how Tim Marcoh - kind-hearted biology teacher, who had a horrible accident that damaged his face, and since kids are the nicest of humans, they tell each other horror stories about the teacher’s supposed criminal past Vato Falman - history teacher, literally no one knows what his teaching is like, because everyone is either asleep or not listening - he tries really hard though Sheshka - school librarian, she can never get the students to return books on time, always lost in her reading
Others: King Bradley - the towns mayor, who advocates for the school to become more elitist and get rid of all the problem children, has some dark secrets Shou Tucker - former biology teacher at the school, fired for unethical behavior - secretly plots revenge Scar - wanted criminal on the run, comes to town to settle things with the people who framed him, gets help from students who uncover a conspiracy and some characters’ dark past Maes Hughes - local sherif and Mustang’s old friend, he suspects that the Mayor is plotting something and manipulating the police force for his own purposes
I can think of more - like Greed running a local motorcycle gang, for example. Or how about the urban legend about Barry The Chopper? Hey, my imagination knows no shame :D
Bonus doodle: Ms Armstrong teaching class. As you can see, I have some unresolved trauma ;<
#please don't hate me#stupid ideas is my super power#fma#fmab#fullmetal alchimist brotherhood#fullmetal alchemist#fma kimblee#fma ed#fma edward#edward elric#fma al#fma alphonse#alphonse elric#fma ling#fma lan fan#ling yao#lan fan#fma winry#winry#fma au#fma fanfiction#fma fanart#olivier mira armstrong#art#Fanart#anime fanart#manga fanart#myart:fanart
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(girls like girls) like boys do, nothing new
can you do a jealous carol x reader ? like reader has had long time crush on carol and admits her feelings only to get turned down bc carol has internalized homophobia and doesn’t know how to react. carol gets jealous when reader is moving on with another mcu character of your choice.
carol danvers x reader
warnings: internalized homophobia, failed the reverse bechdel test (women only talk about one (1) woman, a gay), no gays fighting over Y/N
word count: 2565 for the gays; set in avengers: endgame; everyone lives au
read part 1 here
Now, after a couple of years, you got promoted
Working under Nick Fury and caring for the Flerken really got you qualified to work in the field
And you did, with the best of the best: Natasha, the Black Widow, and Clint, Hawkeye
You were there when Loki destroyed New York, when Ultron threatened to destroy the world
Over time, your powers manifested, they have been dormant for the longest time
Speaking of dormant, you hadnt heard from Carol since the night she left
You talked to Nick, asked him if she’s ever stopped by, but she hasnt
“She’s busy saving the world, Y/N” he’d tell you, but that didnt make you feel better
You felt so hurt, by her reaction, her rejection, but you began to look forward
But you think about her everyday, wondering what could have been
Carol had given Nick a pager, “for emergencies only”, she reminded him, but she also gave you one
Carol told you that it’s just to make sure Fury doesnt send out some false alarms, but who was she kidding? Maybe she did want you to hit her up
But after all those years, you hadn’t
She looks at her pager every single day, wondering if the world would miss her if she decides to come see you, to clear things out
And you have thought about ringing her up too, in times when the world is in trouble, and in times when the feeling you have on your chest is sharp that you couldnt breathe
In times when you miss her so much you cry uncontrollably, hand over your mouth to make sure no one hears
To make sure no one hears how much you miss the woman you love
You were with Nick and Maria when it happened
It was chaos in the city, and you, Nick and Maria got out of the car to investigate
The drivers seats of cars are empty, helicopters crashing into buildings
Almost reflexively, your hand flew to your pocket, where the pager lay there, almost waiting for you to press it
“Y/N?” Maria sounded distressed, and when you turned to her, her body was disintegrating, like sand blown away by the wind
Nick was distressed and eyed you, “You have to call her. Call control.”
You didn’t hesitate, pressing the button as you watched Nick do the same to his pager, watching your mentor and friend disappear right in front of your eyes
When your right hand started to disappear, you moved the pager to your left hand, tears threatening to spill
You were going to die, alone, unloved, and not having told Carol how much you miss her
Her name was the last thing on your lips before you disappeared
When carol came back to earth, she didnt know anyone
But everyone was grateful to her, for returning tony
The burning question in her head, the one thing she almost didn’t want to admit
Where is the woman she loves?
Back then, way back when carol was still a child, she was told that there were a lot of things she couldnt do
She couldn’t be strong, couldn’t play baseball--because she was a woman
She couldn’t join the air force, couldn’t be a pilot--because she was a woman
All of these things she couldn’t do, but there has always been one thing she was not allowed to do, not allowed to be
Because she was a woman, she is not allowed to like other women
Maybe if she tried hard enough, she could break the glass ceiling and become an air force captain, but there was one thing that she just was not allowed to do
And that was to acknowledge weird, different feelings for women
That has always been the case, it was drilled into her being, ever since she was a child
Girls can’t like other girls
And you confessing your feelings to her years ago forced her to acknowledge that her feelings for you were not at all platonic, that she didn’t stay with you for 3 days just because you were a good friend to her
Carol had to face the facts that being with you reminded her that she was human, and deep down, like the child that she was a long time ago, she had feelings that she didn’t believe were right
And she understood that her running away was not the right thing to have done, that she, who almost prided herself for being able to face her problems head on, was not ready to face this one problem that she had been forced to hide deep down, for years and years
Carol Danvers had always liked girls, and she liked you
Carrying that aircraft containing tony stark and nebula did not bother her one bit, what bothered her was that she was coming to earth after all these years
Somehow she believes that she is being forced to finally deal with abandoning you after all these years
But in spite of this, carol is feeling excited about this, because finally, after all these years...she had made peace with it
Girls like girls like boys do, nothing new
And all it took for her to realize that was the beeping of the pager
When everything had settled down, carol had been graciously offered a change of clothes by Pepper, who was hysterically thanking her for bringing tony back
The atmosphere was morbid, everyone in silent despair, and she was quietly begging for someone to fill up the spaces of what has happened on earth since she was last there
Finally, surrounded by a group of people calling themselves the “Avengers” (carol raised an eyebrow at this, asking if nick fury was the one who assembled the group, “Yeah, how’d you know?” Rhodes asked, and she shrugged and said “Lucky guess”), she was finally brought to speed
“It’s been 23 days since Thanos came to earth”
Holograms of people Carol believed were part of this team are projected around her
“We’re trying to take a census, and it looks like he did exactly what he said he was gonna do”
Nick Fury’s face appeared on the screen, much to Carol’s shock
Tears were brimming in her eyes, thinking about the distress call from Nick
Because if Nick sent the distress call and is now, as Natasha said, wiped out...does that mean…?
“Thanos wiped out...50% of all the living creatures”
Y/N’s face appeared in front of Carol not long after
With that, Carol exhaled as tears finally fell down her cheeks...she had her suspicions, but hoped--no, begged--for it to be false
Y/N was gone
And carol was too late
Tony stark had been upset...and collapsed, Carol, who was still in shock, was staring at the hologram of Y/N in front of her
“Carol, right?”
Carol turned, regarding Natasha with a nod
They hadn’t had the chance to properly introduce themselves, but Carol didn’t think there was any time
“Carol Danvers,” Steve added with a chuckle, “I think we all know you by name before we even met you”
“Fury really singing me praises, huh?” Carol was almost amused
Natasha smiled sadly, “Not Fury,” and she and Steve turned their heads toward the hologram of Y/N
“Whenever she had the chance, she would talk about “her”, Y/N’s greatest love,” Natasha whispered, remembering how she and Clint always pretended to be annoyed whenever Y/N would go on and on about this really powerful superhero who shined like the sun, and lit a flame in her heart
And as much as Carol wanted to bask in the appreciation, she felt nothing but shame, knowing she abandoned Y/N, and wasn’t able to save her
Glancing back at the hologram, she eyed her once more
Years had been good to Y/N, still beautiful as ever, leaving her breathless, but she wasn’t there anymore
And Carol knew what she had to do
If she couldn’t save Y/N, Carol could avenge her
Rhodes approached her, Natasha, and Steve, “He’s probably gonna be out for the rest of the day”, referring to tony
With a resolute look on her face, she said, “You guys take care of him, and I’ll bring him a Xorrian elixir when I come back”
Confused, Natasha, Steve and Rhodes glanced at each other before Steve asked, “Where are you going?”
“To kill Thanos,” Carol said matter-of-factly
Natasha could almost feel the anger Carol was radiating with, so she hurried to catch up to her, “You know, we usually work as a team here…”
When Natasha finally had the chance, she pulled carol over to the side to talk to her privately
“I know that you usually work on your own, that there are worlds out there who need you, but earth needs you too”
She was convincing Carol to stay, to try and create a better world for the people who survived, but it was getting quite hard for Carol to remain on earth
“I don’t…” Carol shook her head, “I don’t have much left on earth.”
“If you can’t stay, atleast come from time to time,” Natasha begged, “This was your home, wasn’t it? This was Y/N’s too.”
And Natasha was right, Carol thought, and in more ways than one, it was her home. But now it’s empty, and Carol is in mourning and she had never felt so alone
All those years, she thought she could live with what she did knowing that Y/N she was still on Earth, possibly with someone who is not ashamed of who she is, who is not ashamed to accept their own feelings
And Carol was okay with that thought, but now…
She couldn’t stand being on Earth knowing Y/N wasn’t there
It was like coming home to a cold and empty house
But she looked at Natasha, finally with the courage to ask her what she had been thinking all this time, “Were you and Y/N together?”
“No,” Natasha answered, almost teasingly
Carol felt relief, but above all, she felt obligated
To do right by Y/N
So she agreed to visit and report from time to time, “For Y/N. Because I need to do right by Y/N.”
When Carol returned to earth after 5 years, Thanos was there, and so was everybody who had disappeared 5 years ago
In spite of all the chaos, she couldn’t help the voice in her head, asking, “Is Y/N here? Is she safe?”
But you were nowhere to be found, and she had promised to scour the world for you later
Thanos was defeated, but it was in exchange for the lives of Tony and Natasha
With a heavy heart, everyone attended their funerals, all grieving the loss of two of their comrades, friends
At the funeral, Carol stood at the distance, watching behind everybody else
Behind her, Nick was there, and they exchanged solemn nods and opted to wait until the end of the funeral to reconnect
“You came,” was the first thing Fury said, after all those years that they haven’t seen each other
With a small chuckle, she nodded, “Don’t flatter yourself, I didn’t come because you called.”
“I know,” Fury retorted, amused, “You came because she called, right?”
Carol’s mouth opened, lips about to ask a question she had been dying to ask ever since she came back, but no words came out
When everything was chaos and adrenaline and fighting, Carol was not scared
But now that the dust has settled, she was terrified...because now there was no more excuse to avoid what her heart has been begging her to do
Before she could push the question out of her mouth, Fury handed her a piece of paper. “She’s off-duty. Gave her a whole damn month to recuperate from being wiped off the face of the planet.”
And when Carol unfolded the piece of paper, it was just an address
Nodding gratefully to Fury, Carol turned to leave, about to face her biggest obstacle yet
From what she could tell, it was a safehouse
Apparently, Y/N was someone high up the organization that they had warranted her one
Just a little cottage out on the countryside, a palace she had always wanted
Carol laughed whenever she remember you saying, “Maybe one day I could afford a little house in the middle of Kansas, meet Clark Kent and Lois Lane...I don’t know”
And here you were, at a small little house in the countryside
Carol watched you, almost ashamed to just be staring at you while you make yourself some breakfast
As she approached the porch, she wondered how she could take on the mad titan Thanos, but is now shaking as she brought her knuckles to knock on your door, extremities suddenly feeling cold, and knees wobbling to support her weight
She could barely hear your footsteps because of the blood rushing to her head, to her face, heart beating wildly
And when you opened the door, she noted how your eyes widened the tiniest bit, mouth opened in surprise when you realized who was on the other side
“Hi, Y/N,” was the first thing she croaked out
“You…” you smiled at her, “you changed your hair”
With a laugh, she nodded, running a hand through her short hair, before she let her hand down
Slowly counting to three
And engulfed you in a hug
Absolutely-swept-you-off-your-feet hug, your feet leaving the ground as her arms wound tightly across your waist, almost crushing you
And when you heard her inhale into the nape of your neck, it was like a reflex that you threw your arms around her neck, squeezing her just as tight
And Carol wanted to apologize, and confess, and plead for you to give her another chance
She wanted to tell you that she’s sorry for leaving, i was so confused and i was scared to come back and have you look me in the eye and tell me you don’t forgive me for what i did, but i have made peace with who i am and know what i want and what i want is you and your happiness and you and you
And she may have tried to make a letter to help her organize her thoughts
You held her shoulders back, looking at her, really looking at her, after all these years, and you use your thumbs to wipe away the tears running down her face as she shyly laughed at you and held your hands to her cheeks and kept it there for a second, relishing in your heat because you were finally here, after all this time, after 5 long years you are alive
And she brought your hands down and cupped your face and leaned in
And touched her lips to yours, gently, lovingly, finally
You can taste the saltiness of her tears, but also her apologies, and love, and devotion and you kissed her back, smiling
And as you pulled away, you wiped her tears again, before holding her hands, guiding Carol inside, “Let’s eat breakfast.”
And Carol Danvers, for once, was selfish, and did not think of the world needing her help, because she knows that the world would be fine if Carol stayed home for a while
And home is wherever you are
a/n: thank you so much for your support! i rly hope you like this ;__;
#Carol Danvers#carol danvers imagine#carol danvers x reader#Captain Marvel#captain marvel x reader#captain marvel imagine#Brie Larson#brie larson imagine#brie larson x reader#marvel#marvel imagine#marvel x reader#WLW#wlw imagine#lesbian#lesbian imagine#batfamtv
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prompt idea for sam/steve/bucky
sharing clothes :)
All Caps, my love (this was so fun to work on because it really highlighted how differently I write them when Steve is involved)
Set in the same universe as You Don't Have to Read My Mind (to know what I have in mind) which means Nico and Hattie make a return and silver fox Commander Rogers is around
Read on AO3!
The Other Be Other
It was Nico who noticed it first, so he didn’t say jack to anyone. Well, not right away. It took him three days to break and scoot his desk chair into Hattie’s cubicle. “Hey, did you see Barnes the other day?” he asked.
Hattie’s eyelids actually fluttered. “Fuck, he looked so good,” she said. “And smelt good too.”
Nico scrunched up his nose. “He smelled like fried fish. Anyway, did you see that shirt he was wearing?”
He let Hattie think. Let her mentally redress him. “It was that blue fishing shirt, wasn’t it? Over a white t-shit. He had it open.”
“Yeah. It was a blue shirt with darker blue sharks on it,” Nico said.
“You pay a lot of attention to him. Hey, if you’re into Barnes, I’m not backing down. You’ll have to fight me for him,” she teased.
Nico blushed furiously and then willed it away because he didn’t want to explain why he was blushing or let Hattie think he was blushing because he had a crush on Barnes. “No, that’s not what I meant. Wilson was wearing the same shirt two weeks ago when he came in to file the newest report on Walker.”
Now Hattie scrunched up her nose. “Fuck that guy,” she said and Nico almost laughed.
“I would’ve thought he was your type.”
“As if,” she said. “So what? Barnes and Wilson have the same shirt.” Nico cut her an unimpressed look. “You think Barnes and Wilson are wearing the same shirt,” she clarified.
“Listen, everyone already knows Barnes wears Wilson’s Air Force hoodie,” Nico said.
“Someone said it was the new Falcon’s.”
“It’s not Joaquin’s,” Nico said quickly. Too quickly. Horrifyingly quickly.
“Oh my God, do you like the new Falcon?” Hattie asked.
“We’re not talking about the new Falcon,” Nico said. “We’re talking about Wilson and Barnes.”
“Barnes and Wilson,” Hattie corrected.
“Wilson is Captain America. He comes first.”
“You think so?” she asked with a wicked grin.
Nico blushed so hard he thought he might actually spring a fever.
* * *
“Why are you wearing that, Barnes?” Sam asked from the driver’s side of the car.
“What, you don’t like it?” Bucky asked, tossing his duffel bag into the backseat and climbing into the passenger side. “You left it in the dryer. It was the first thing I grabbed.”
“Grab your own clothes,” Sam said.
“Damn, you’re about to have Steve go down on you, can you lighten up?” Bucky snorted. “You’re high strung.” He leaned over to kiss Sam sweetly and then tried not to laugh when Sam turned it all sorts of filthy. “Save it for Steve, tiger,” he teased. “He whined all night last night about missing you and you not bein’ around to get on the phone with him.”
“He’s been up there for a week,” Sam said as he rolled his eyes. Sam had also kind of been kicking himself for managing to miss the call last night, though. It was probably why he was so grouchy this morning. “Four more hours,” he added.
“I have to swing by HQ and drop off our reports for this mission,” Bucky reminded him.
“Right, you have to do that. I’ll drop your ass off and go get my man.”
“Hey, he was mine first,” Bucky said.
“So I’ve got time to make up for.”
Bucky shoved Sam’s shoulder and got a reaming about car safety even though they were barely on the road yet.
* * *
It happened again a week later. Wilson and Barnes had been in and out of the office, always so, so, so loud. There was always an argument to be had, always a fight to pick with Fury, always something embarrassing to say about Commander Rogers. Nico couldn’t figure out why they spent so much time around the office. Rogers worked in a whole different building and Fury wanted nothing to do with either of them, as far as he could tell.
But there they were at 11 AM, complaining that it wasn’t lunch yet. At 3 in the afternoon, tempting people to leave early. At 9, right after official-opening, with coffee for everyone but Fury, who wasn’t around to see their joke anyway.
There was Sam at two in the afternoon, wearing a leather jacket that was so out of place in the middle of DC in the dead of summer in the heat of the afternoon. Nico could sweat just looking out the window. But, Sam looked really, really good in the jacket, so Nico couldn’t fault him for suffering through the heat to wear it.
Damn, maybe it was a Falcon thing with him.
And maybe Nico did watch Sam a little closely. Maybe he kept his eyes on Sam’s back while he leaned on a cubicle wall that was not strong enough to support him and all that muscle. Maybe he stared at his smooth skin and the way the jacket pulled over his shoulders and--
There was stitching around the arm of the jacket. Nico blinked a few times to make sure it wasn’t a trick of the light, but there was definitely blue thread holding the arm of the jacket to the rest of it.
And actually now that he was looking at the jacket and not Sam Wilson, he recognized the pattern on it, the weird ribbing down the sides, the golden buckles on the back to adjust the waist. He’d seen that jacket before. On the news. Several months ago, he’d had to pour over news footage of a Serpent Society...attack? fight? because Barnes had been part of it and his dumb report had said, I know there’s video footage of this. That’s my statement. So Nico had needed to put together a fucking highlights reel of Barnes’ action to file the report.
He’d gotten in trouble for it too.
He pulled the file up on his computer and watched the footage for a second to make sure it was the same jacket. And it was, except Barnes had ripped the sleeve off of his to show his metal arm. The left arm. The arm resewn onto this jacket.
The video suddenly cut into sound, making Nico jump. Sam Wilson looked over at him, at the footage on the computer and Barnes flipping over cars to avoid gunfire in that jacket. He reached over to shut the player off on Nico’s computer. “You work too hard, kid,” he said. “Barnes is never gonna give you a day off if you don’t take it.”
“Ha, how’d you know he’s always stuck...I mean, assigned Sergeant Barnes’ reports?” Hattie asked.
Sam shot Nico a knowing look and Nico panicked, thinking Sam knew that Nico knew about more than the $100 on his desk and a missing file. But that was impossible. It was just because of the note and bribery.
Bribery from Captain America and the Winter Soldier. Jesus, what was his life?
* * *
“This was a eight hundred dollar jacket,” Steve scolded. The irritation on his face, coupled with his silver hair and those damn broad shoulders, was doing all sorts of things to Sam that Sam didn’t want to analyze too deeply. He mostly wanted to sit back and snicker at Bucky getting in trouble.
“I’m just gonna rip that arm off again,” Bucky said boredly, one leg tucked under him on the couch where he was lounging, the other thrown over Steve’s back. “Why blue thread?” he asked eventually.
“To shame you into not doing this shit again,” Sam said.
“Color theory,” Steve answered.
“There’s no color theory to using royal blue thread in a black jacket. It’s not even navy,” Bucky said.
“You wanna do it?” Steve asked.
“Obviously not. Can name a lot of other things I do want to do though.”
Steve threw the jacket at Bucky’s face instead of answering. Sam jumped up to snag it before Bucky could toss it across the room.
“What’re you doin’?” Bucky lilted up at him, turning bright blue eyes towards him from the arm of the couch. Sam reached out to stroke his thumb over Bucky’s jaw and then down his arched neck.
“Gonna wear it ‘til it stops smelling like the two of you,” he said. And then gasped and dropped the jacket as Steve was suddenly right on top of him, pressing him to the wall and kissing down his neck.
“Damn, I’ve gotta tear more shit up more often if this is what it gets me,” Bucky hummed and did something with a zipper and his metal hand that Sam could guess at but did not want to tear his eyes away from Steve to confirm.
* * *
“Holy shit,” Hattie breathed, a hand coming up to cover her mouth.
To read the reports from the heroes was one thing. Nico had read about so many bones sticking through skin that the image had started to lose its gruesomeness. He’d never been in a firefight and he’d only been a baby during the Battle of New York and during the Triskelion event in DC a few years after. Sure, he’d been around for the Blip, had struggled through five years without half the population, and then struggled through the next years after everyone reappeared, but that wasn’t the same kind of trauma as this. And he’d still only been a kid. He didn’t know what was going on then.
Now, watching from every screen in the room and occasionally out the window, he knew he was watching something terrible. He didn’t personally know any of the heroes, but it felt like watching friends being beaten and knocked down.
“Was that Hawkeye?” someone asked.
“No, that was a girl.”
“Who’s wearing Captain Marvel’s star?”
“Oh God, Spiderman just fell.”
“Wait, the new Falcon caught him.”
“Is the Hulk still fighting that thing in the ground?”
“Yeah, Thor’s still knocked out too.”
“Where’s Captain America?”
Nico pinched his arm until Hattie reached for his hand to stop him. Suddenly, a flash of red, white, and blue crashed onto a roof, drawing the attention of whatever mystic hell demon was leading the fire and brimstone charge on downtown DC.
“Oh, shit, hell yeah, Sam Wilson!” someone cheered and then everyone groaned when some lizard-like-thing knocked Sam flying with a spiked tail to the midsection.
“Wait,” Hattie said, mostly to Nico. “That’s not Sam.”
And, yeah, that was an understatement. It wasn’t his outfit and even the cowl couldn’t hide that it was a white guy under all those stars and stripes.
“Fuck, is Walker really gonna try it?” Hattie asked.
“It’s not Walker,” Nico said. “Walker doesn’t have access to the Falcon wings. Or the original Cap suit.”
Not-Wilson, Not-Walker, Not-Captain-America struggled to his feet, holding his arm around his ribs, to face the demon thing. A news drone flew closer so the coverage could pick up on the creature rasping and snarling out words.
“Captain America, you’re the one we’re looking for,” it growled.
“Yeah,” Not-Cap said, nodding his head tiredly. “That’s what I heard.”
“Oh my God,” Hattie breathed again.
“It’s Barnes,” Nico confirmed. Wearing a sleeve and glove, clean shaven, in the red, white, and blue. In the wings.
“Is he...is he acting like...bait or something? If that thing wants Cap…”
Nico shook his head. “No, not bait. He’s a red herring. He’s distracting it for Sam.”
“We want a pure soul. A fine example to be made.” The creature’s voice suddenly changed, along with its face, talons growing from its hands, a tail curling against the roof they were on. “The righteous ones make the best sounds when we flay them.”
Barnes grimaced. “You’re gonna be really disappointed in the sounds mine makes then,” he said. In a blink, he had a gun drawn from an invisible holster and shot the creature. It howled and writhed and smoke rose from boiling lesions on its body. Something splashed back on the drone and almost immediately, the drone went out of service.
On another screen, another news source, another camera, the lizard that had attacked Barnes earlier scrambled across the roof towards him again and Bucky went flying back, literally. The wings lifted him into the air, but not quickly enough. The lizard leapt up too, caught claws in Bucky’s leg and scored gashes down his thigh and calf as it fell away and then tried to climb back up. Bucky shot at it with the same gun he’d shot the demon with but it had less effect. He kicked at the lizard’s head with his good leg and urged the wings to take him higher. Again, the lizard scored down his leg and Bucky was obviously in pain as he tried to kick it free again. Eventually he must have hit a soft spot and the thing fell off, taking chunks of uniform and God knows what else with it.
This camera was too far away to pick up any words, but Nico saw Bucky’s hand go to his ear, to a comm. Then he was flying back down to the same roof. Another drone swooped in and everyone moved to the screen broadcasting that channel.
“Humans are messy creatures,” Barnes said to the struggling figure on the roof. It shifted again, acid and fluids and skin staying behind on the roof as it turned into something with feathers. “I don’t think you’ll be impressed with many of our souls. They’re all fucked up in one way or another.” He blinked tears and sweat out of his eyes and Nico wondered how badly he wanted to take the cowl off. He hated having his face covered. It was one thing he did manage to write in his reports.
“You’re a liar,” the creature said.
“You’re not the first to call me that,” Barnes agreed. “Definitely the ugliest though.”
“You’re a child playing dress up. You’re not Captain America.”
“Nah, they gave the job to the more good looking guy,” Bucky agreed and took the gun out again.
Nico wasn’t sure if he took a step to get closer or if his messed up leg finally gave out, but in the split second that he had to readjust, another animal demon, something catlike and long, lunged at him, at his arm, and sent him sprawling onto the roof.
“Bucky!” someone in the room cried as the demon towered over him, lifted itself on oily wings, talons like swords pointed to Bucky’s body as he tried to crawl away on a bad leg and bad arm.
And then something even darker crashed into the demon mid-air. The Winter Soldier? That wasn’t possible. Bucky was on the ground. But there was that silver arm, the heavy black tactical gear, holsters in every size and shape. That fucking mask that Nico wanted to burn himself the longer he read Bucky’s reports.
“That’s Sam!” Hattie shouted and then clapped a hand over her mouth. Her other hand tightened in Nico’s and they both stepped closer to each other. Sam grappled with the demon in flight. He was far nimbler on the wings, more dexterous and faster. He had something silver in his hand, a blade of some kind. Occasionally it glowed and it was the only way Nico could tell the demon and Sam apart, to find an end to the black wings and find Sam’s stealth wings, to make sure Sam was still in one piece.
The blade glowed as it made contact with the demon’s midsection and Sam wrenched it all the way up its body. Ichor and acid spilled onto the roof and now Nico’s hand tightened in Hattie’s as the news drone panned down quickly to watch the blood fall. To watch Joaquin pull Bucky out of the way, using the Falcon wings as covering as he did so.
The drone refocused on Sam, who had the stealth wings driven into either side of the demon’s neck, another weapon in his hand, something beaming and sharp. Redwing appeared directly in front of the drone before Sam made contact with the demon. The body fell out of frame in a split second and then Redwing was gone too.
Sam just about crashed down to the roof. There was blood running the length of his face and a swollen eye, scratches down his weapons arm. The kevlar was torn apart, but he seemed to be in one piece. He ripped the mask off of his face, jaw and mouth protected, no broken bones or loose hinges, yanked away the silver cast he’d had on his left arm, and there were no injuries on that side either.
Demonic creatures squealed and writhed where they’d been, decaying into blood and ash and stone. One was too close to Joaquin and Bucky, but it stopped too, claws just short of Joaquin’s jetpack.
Sam was running over to them before the wings could even retract fully. He skidded to his knees by Bucky’s body, lifted him up, held him close with an arm around his back, the other hand going to the back of Bucky’s head. Bucky reached for Sam’s arm with his human hand, covered in blood, bones sticking out of his forearm, elbow smashed visibly. Still, he put his hand on Sam’s arm, tried to squeeze it.
Sam brought their foreheads together.
* * *
“Stop moving,” Steve said. Normally, he would have snapped it. Reminiscent of a thousand bad nights in their apartment in the thirties. Stop moving, Stevie, you’ll upset your lungs. Stop moving, Stevie, those knuckles are never gonna heal. Stop moving, Stevie, you’ll press your cold toes against my leg again.
He reached over for the water cup Bucky wanted and helped him drink it slowly. When Bucky started to cough, Sam jolted awake on his other side. “What’s happening?” he asked, blinking blearily and scratching at the gauze over his eye.
“Bucky never learned how to swallow,” Steve said.
All three of them took in a breath to make a joke but none of them actually said it outloud. It felt too wrong. The air was still too raw. Everything about them was still raw.
Raw. Flayed.
Steve turned and retched into the sink on the other side of the room. A moment later, Sam’s hand found his back and gently rubbed between his shoulder blades. He was using the left hand, Steve figured. There were no bandages rubbing on Steve’s shirt.
“I’m so sorry,” Steve said for the millionth time in the twenty hours since the fight. “I should have never sent you out.”
“Shut the fuck up, Steve,” Bucky sighed. “There were a dozen other heroes out there. Most of them kids. We weren’t gonna sit around and do nothing.”
“I told you to make the sacrifice play. I told you to fight through it.” When Sam dropped something over his shoulders, something warm and smelling of disinfectant but also Sam’s cologne, he curled his fingers in it and hide his face against it.
“Yeah, ‘cause we’ve never been hurt before,” Bucky agreed. “Get over here, you dope,” he said and patted the bed with his metal arm.
Steve and Sam went back to the bed. There was enough room for Steve to sit with one leg kicked down the bed and the other resting over the edge, on the floor. Sam carefully sat on his lap like Steve had been the one in the fight. Like Steve might be hurt. Steve hugged his arms around Sam’s midsection and rested his cheek on the back of Sam’s shoulder, wrapped Sam’s blanket around him too.
“You know,” Sam said and then had to reach for the water himself. Sulfur was hell on the throat as it turned out. “You looked damn good in that outfit, Barnes,” he tried again. “But don’t go getting any ideas about changing your name.”
Bucky laughed, soft and a little pained, metal arm going around his ribs again. “Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said. “I’m banging fifty percent of all Captains America. If I took on the mantle, I’d skew my own numbers.”
Steve tsked on his other side and ran a hand through Bucky’s hair gently. “Behave, Barnes.”
“I’m sure there’s some sort of toy out there that’s supposed to emulate the Winter Soldier,” Sam said. “You could probably technicality your way out of it. Plus your own fingers,” he pointed out. “Then you’d be up to sixty percent.”
“Jesus,” Steve breathed and turned his eyes Heavenward. “Neither one of you would’ve done the job for what that thing wanted,” he said.
“Wow, Rogers, was that a joke about our near-death experience?” Bucky asked. But he couldn’t keep the faux outrage up. He grinned and reached for Steve’s hand against Sam’s thigh.
Steve kissed Sam’s shoulder and then brought Bucky’s knuckles to his mouth. “I’m so fucking happy you’re both okay,” he whispered softly. “I don’t know what I would’ve done if anything had happened.”
“Nothing did, Steve,” Sam said, turning to catch Steve’s lips on his. “You had a solid plan and we executed it like you said we would. We’re a good team.” He kissed him again and then reached over to rub his thumb along Bucky’s wrist so he didn’t feel too left out.
“Besides, if anything did happen, you’d become the first American to have to go to hell to get his lovers out. It’s normally a Greek thing, I think,” Bucky said.
Steve rolled his eyes, exasperated and so, so, so lucky in love.
* * *
“Do you think...they’re in trouble?” Hattie ventured, staring at the locked office door that they’d all been barred from coming near when Wilson, Barnes, and Rogers had walked in two hours earlier.
It had been three weeks since the Spawning, as people around the office, and literally no one else, was calling it. In that time, Nico had seen neither hide nor hair of any of them, or even really Fury. All of their projects had been granted stays of deadline and Nico had even been invited into a committee to sort through the reports of the Spawning. Mostly because Wilson and Barnes were both involved and that was basically only his M.O. now.
He hadn’t seen Fury call Wilson, Barnes, and Rogers in. Granted, they weren’t in their normal office space. The committee had actually been moved to Commander Rogers’ building. He’d been the commanding officer of the mission to take down the Spawning, so it was just easier to stay at his beck-and-call.
“It’s not Rogers’ office, is it?” Hattie asked.
Nico flipped another pencil into the ceiling. “No. His is a big corner office with all the windows.”
Hattie stood on her chair and yanked three pencils down. “So whose office is that?” she asked.
“Hat, I moved over here at the same time you did,” he pointed out.
“Yeah, but I know you’re cozy with Torres and he knows shit like that.”
“I am not!” Nico insisted like he always had to when the subject came up. “Besides, he’s Air Force, not Shield. Sam gave him the wings. He’s a freelancer.”
“Too bad. There’s no money in freelancing. You’ll have to be the bread-winner.”
Nico dragged his hands over his face. A pencil fell from the ceiling and hit him in the head. “Maybe it’s an empty office. A meeting room. Maybe they’re having a National Icons Meeting.”
“Maybe. I have to pee. Text me if anything happens?”
Nico gave her a half-hearted salute and slouched down in his chair. Of course, almost immediately the door opened and Steve Rogers stepped out.
Nico was so entirely fucked once again.
Because Steve Rogers was disheveled. Unkempt. Messy. Taken apart. Wrecked. In a very good way.
Nico brought his hand over his face but kept looking through his fingers.
Steve Rogers’ hair was sticking up every which way and there were at least three hickies on his neck. And one on his shoulder, which Nico could see because he was in that damn shark shirt, unbuttoned and half off his shoulder. There was a whole entire bite mark around his collarbone.
Steve Rogers looked around the hallway and glanced over the office and didn’t see Nico apparently. He tugged the shirt on straight and buttoned most of the buttons, except for two that Nico was pretty sure were missing at the top. And then, and then, he put on the jacket with the ribbing and the buckles and the dumb blue thread.
Steve Rogers ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath. Just in time for the office door to open again and to have Bucky Barnes, with a lot of skin showing, appear and say loudly, “You took Sam’s underwear,” and haul him back into the room with the metal arm. Nico heard the door lock.
He slowly crawled out of the office, ran into Hattie in the next hall.
“Hey, did anything happen?” she asked, drying her hands on her pants.
“Nope,” Nico squeaked unconvincingly. “Just got sent home for the day.”
“Sweet,” she said. “Wanna go get some lunch?”
Nico nodded silently even though he wasn’t sure if he should try eating. He really needed to ask for that transfer.
#sambucky#sam wilson#bucky barnes#steve rogers#the falcon and the winter soldier#captain america#all caps#writing
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an angsty prompt that i think could work for roy OR riza, if you want it!! (a drink glass slammed) "I am a WAR HERO—" (clenched fists) "You were a CHILD—barely an adult—clinging to naive ideals about how the world works, and you're a fool if you think that you can change a damn thing." (a sigh. fists loosen)
hi anon!! your mind btw... this was a good one!! thank you so much!!
not me tentatively posting this in the hopes i did such a good prompt justice and that it sounds all right
please heed the warnings before reading
rated: m | words: 1774 | warnings: adult themes, allusions to suicide, alcohol abuse, unhealthy coping mechanisms
“Sir, that’s enough to drink.”
Hawkeye reached across to grab his glass, but Roy moved it out of reach instantly, affronted she would even dare to try. He should have gone to the bar. At least there she wouldn’t have tried such a thing. In his own home, with no one else about, was another matter.
“Excuse me?”
“That’s enough –”
“Hawkeye.” He barked at her, anger replacing his irritation.
“Sir, this is not the way to do this.”
“Just one, then I’ll get to work,” Roy deflected, turning his shoulders so that the glass was shielded from her wanting hands. He was also ignoring the fact that it was past midnight, and he should be asleep instead of turning to a bottle of whisky.
“What work are you going to get done in a drunken state?”
“I’ll get it done,” Roy snapped. “I have a plan,” he lied. He had nothing left. “It will change everything –”
“You won’t,” Hawkeye fired back, hands clenching into fists. “Not like this,” she shook her head. “Nothing will change while acting like this, burying yourself inside a bottle like a coward.”
“Coward?” He echoed her claim, disbelief and outrage flooding him. He slammed his tumbler onto the table, spinning to face her. “I am a war hero,” Roy growled, cutting Hawkeye off. He’d survived that hell and come back home. He at least deserved to drink to forget –
“You were a child – barely an adult – clinging to naïve ideals about how the world works, and you're a fool if you think that you can change a damn thing.”
Breathing heavily, Hawkeye continued to glare while Roy’s face slackened in his shock. Her words cut into her chest painfully, each a dagger inside his heart. His true feelings were being laid bare, ripped unwillingly from his mind. It was all correct, he just didn’t want to admit it. He couldn’t. If he did, he would break completely.
Both war-weary soldiers were frozen in a stalemate, glaring at one another.
Roy had set out to achieve greatness and do something good in the world… And it had all burned around him. How could he accept that his dreams, ideals, and views of the world had been painfully twisted into reality? It had not been gentle or forgiving. That innocent, optimistic, young man had been turned into a mass murderer with the snap of two fingers. Everything had been ripped from him. He’d failed. It was of catastrophic proportions, and Roy didn’t want to admit that just yet. His mental state was fragile, so could only handle so much at one time. Drinking was the only coping mechanism he had. He didn’t deserve anything else.
However, she’d been just as bad as him over there, thinking she could change the world… Only for it to come crashing down and turn to ash horrifically before her very eyes.
And who prompted that decision from her? Roy’s inner voice hissed inside his mind, as unforgiving as the truths that were being laid bare tonight.
Finally, a sigh passed through Roy’s lips, the air dragging itself from his lungs. His gaze dropped, hiding from the heat of Hawkeye’s stare. The side of Roy’s palm tingled from its contact with the table below. The sensation dragged him back to the present. The grip on the glass loosened, blood returning slowly to the tips of his fingers.
“We were both children,” Hawkeye corrected herself, voice softer and apologetic.
“We were. We still are.”
“Sorry, that was harsh and over the line –”
Roy shook his head. “No, you are correct. You’ve never held back before either, Hawkeye. Why stop now?” As a reflex, he lifted the glass to his lips and took a large swig. The time when it returned to the varnished wood, the contact was gentle. The fight had left him.
“So, not a war hero.” Roy’s eyes never lifted from the tumbler. “What would you call us then?”
“War criminals.” Hawkeye’s reply was sharp yet simple. There was no hesitation in her reply and no shying away from her truth. It was spoken with such conviction that it made Roy pause for a second.
“War criminals…” His fingers circled the rim of the glass. That was correct. They were. There was no hiding from it and there wouldn’t be for the rest of their lives. The question was, what to do now?
“Of course. That was no war. It was an extermination.”
The bile that had been roiling inside his stomach continued to do so, every so often jumping up into his throat. It was like a game to see how much it could torment him before it removed itself from his stomach completely.
Roy pushed the tumbler still half full of whisky away from him, moving it out of reach.
He knew his goals, knew his destination, but in his stupor Roy was like a lost little boy, just like Hawkeye had said. In that exact moment he was floundering, desperately trying to cling to life while at the same time thinking it would be so much easier and better for everyone if he gave up that fight. In his current emotional and mental state, he had no idea where to go now. He’d ask Hawkeye for help however he’d brought this down on them both. He couldn’t take anymore from her.
“Where do we go from here?” It wouldn’t hurt to get a second opinion.
“Up, Sir,” Hawkeye replied without hesitation. “There’s no other direction to go.”
“Do we deserve to live after the atrocities we caused?” His heavy lids blinked slowly as he glanced up at his old friend. That question had been weighing on his mind heavily for days and the outcome he’d arrived at was not pleasant.
“We must.” Hawkeye was determined but her voice was a whisper, unable to rise any higher. “We have to keep going so this never happens again. We will make a change.”
“Sacrifice ourselves for the greater good?”
“We will bear it, so they don’t have to.”
It terrified Roy to think about the journey to come. Sleep was already non-existent for him. It wasn’t worth it because the nightmares would come. How much longer could he cope? How much longer could he ride this out?
“Sir?” Hawkeye called to him, dragging himself from the depths of his dark mind once more. She was concerned. A tiny step forward was taken, moving closer, before coming to a stop. “Roy?”
“Yes?” His voice was rough, trembling as it passed through his throat. Clearing the lump there, he met her eyes while moisture swelled within his. He was so tired. He needed direction, purpose, something. Anything that would tear him away from his thoughts and his memories would be Roy’s saving grace that night. He was a desperate man, on his knees, begging.
“We’ll get through this. Together.”
Looking in her eyes, he saw the determination in them. Another hesitant step was taken forward and Hawkeye gently slid her fingers atop his. Her touch was ghost-like, barely there but held enough pressure to make him shiver. Roy was frozen, lips parted in his shock, but unable to look away from Hawkeye. His old friend. His saviour on more than one occasion.
Hawkeye’s eyes were on their hands instead. Her digits looped around his, the opposite to her soothing touch from before. They clung on tightly. “Together.” Roy had to strain to hear her whisper.
Surging up from the chair he wrapped his arms around her in an embrace. Coming together at once, their kisses were feverish and desperate. Hawkeye – no, Riza – was equally as frantic as him. Her hands shoved at his military jacket as she whimpered, trying to remove it from his shoulders while his fingers loosened hers, revealing the crisp white shirt underneath.
“Don’t leave me,” he pleaded in a whisper against her lips.
“Never.” Her reply was immediate, claiming his lips with her once more.
A sob escape Roy as a tear fell down his cheek. “I – I mean it, I –” Roy pulled away, gripping her upper arms tightly. She was pulled back from him as Roy bowed his head, averting his eyes. His lids were squeezed closed tightly. He knew this was wrong. Roy couldn’t and shouldn’t be asking anything from her after what he’d done. He shouldn’t be doing this either –
A gentle hand on his cheek guided his face back up. His jaw unclenched as he looked at Riza, feeling desolate in every way. She didn’t deserve this kind of behaviour from him.
“Never,” she stressed. “Not tonight, not ever. We –” She swallowed thickly. “We have too much work to do,” Riza added in a quiet whisper, as if afraid speaking it too loud would break him there and then. “And we’ll see it through together. But…” Her hand dropped as she bit her lip. Quickly, her eyes moved away from Roy’s, looking off to the side in shame.
“What?” His prompt was gentle even with his hoarse voice. Roy was still blinking away tears as he listened intently to her, hanging onto every word.
“I need you.” She was anguished, ashamed to admit it, just like him. Roy could sympathise completely. “I know I shouldn’t – we shouldn’t – but I can’t –” Her eyelids fluttered closed, expression pained, as Riza took a moment to collect herself.
“I need you too,” Roy admitted quietly. He hated to do it, but it was the truth. He was at rock bottom anyway, how much further could he fall now? This self-destructive behaviour of theirs was mutual but maybe…
Just maybe, Roy thought, it would keep them both alive for another night.
“I need you as much as you need me.”
Riza stepped forward into his embrace once again, cupping his face tightly in her hands.
This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. This wasn’t healthy. It was better for his physical health than the alcohol, but it was still wrong. His actions didn’t warrant him getting to hold her, cherish her, and love her. He wasn’t in the best frame of mind either, but neither was she. It was bad.
All Roy knew was Riza. All he wanted was Riza. And it was enough to get him through the night, to forget for a moment, and to live another day.
#royai#royai fic#royai fanfic#royai oneshot#ask#anon#fic request#emma writes#aaaa#i just#idk i went hard#and don't want it to not sound real#so#yeah#me staring at it for another age won't make it better so here goes
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WELCOME TO MY THOUGHTS WHILE REWATCHING THE MCU IN TIMELINE ORDER: THOR
it was a dark and stormy night when padme, an old man, and a beautiful nerd named darcy a find bright light in the sky with thunder and s giant tornado in it. AND CHRIS HEMSWORTH HOLY SHIT
STORYTELLING WITH ODIN ABOUT A FIGHT WITH ICE CREAM TROLLS. frosty the snow man is angry about it
GLOWY CUBE
agard. sounds like ass guard. baby thor and loki are adorable. story telling ended up being fairytail for children. WINGED HELMET
LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI
ah yes. the hammer named MILJinoNOR made in the heart of a star. ohshit walls got frosty. AMBUSH
“i swear, i swear, i sWEAR!” SHUSH IT AND GET TO FIGHTING. YALL GOT FROSTY BOYS INVADING ASS GUARD- oh fuck eye beam giant is OP.
thor is bloodthirsty, thats how you get the plot of the movie when you get turned mortal :/
loki is lovely i love him. he will never ever ever do anything wrong- oh hes starting drama between thor and frosty boys
WHOMST THE FUCK ARE THESE PEOPLE??
“and who proved wrong that a young maiden could be one of the fiercesr warriors.” “i did” “true, but i supported you, sif.” JSHSKHSKSJSKSJSJ
HORSES ON THE GLITTER GLASS BRIDGE. this is all beautiful wtf i love asgard. HEIMDALL- thor stfu dont shut loki down ya fucker. yall are bullying loki and then get shocked he turns evil?
MAGIC SWORD IS THE KEY TO ALL THE REALMS. HAHA ROUND THINGY GO SPINNY SPINNY. heimdall tells em the bridge to frosty realm might fuck em over and leave em to die.
“we shouldnt be here.” MAYBE BRING THAT UP AT THE PLANNING BIT, NOT THE ‘WE’RE HERE LETS GO EXPLORE’ BIT. DEEP VOICE IS SMEXY AS FUCK
“You’re nothing but a boy. who came to prove hinself a man.”
“know your place. brother.” STOP BEING MEAN TO LOKI, THOR :(
HAMMER GO B O N K ON FROSTY BOYS SKSNSKSKSK
LOKIS MAGIC IS AMAZING YOU’RE DOING GREAT BBY- laughing during a sword fight because fuck every other emotion righ- OHSHIT NVM HE GOT IMPALED ON A SPIKE OF ICE
GIANT SNOW BEAST GO BRRRR. THUNDER ON THESE FROST COVERED ASSES- whY is he still laughing he got a spike through his chest what the hell dude you good?
HOLYSHIT THOR JUST CHUCKED MILNNOR THROUGH THE BEASTS FUCKING HEAD LIKE A KNIFE THROUGH BUTTER
ODIN TO SAVE THE DAY AND GET HIS CHILDS ASS OUT OF TROUBLE. thor started a fucking war because of this fightboner jesus christ this child. SHOUTING MATCHES
daddys angry with his child- thor is unworthy this, unworthy that. AND BANISHED TO EARTH LIKE A FUCKING LOSER SKSHSKSJSJ
and back to padme’s modern time wE GO
HA HE GOT MERKED BY A TAZER
DARCY YOU ADORABLE CHILD
“How dArE YOu aTtAcK tHE SoN oF oDIN😡😡😡” hes like an angry puppy
body in a photo?? pog info??? WHY HAS HE BEEN HIT BY A CAR TWICE ALREADY
STAN LEE
COULSON
THOR IS FUCKING RIPPED. meanwhile is ass guard. loki snitched for a good reason. but nOoOoO thors, friends, blame loki.WHY ARE THEY BLAMING LOKI FOR BRING IN THE FROSTY BOYS- oh shit he can controll the snow cube. backstory for loki? mayhaps?- HOLYSHIT HES A SMURF
“the casket wasnt the only thing you took from jotunheim that day, was it?” HES ONTO YOU ODIN. odin literally kidnapped- oh no nvm loki as a baby was left for dead. I WANNA HUG LOKI SO BAD HES IN EMOTINAL DISSTRESS :(
“because i-i-i’m the monster, parents tell their children about at night?” LOKI BABY EVERYTHINGS GONNA BE OKAY
holyshit loki’s breakdown killed odin wtf. my man collasped onto the staircase
“this drink. i like it.” “i know its gre-“ “ANOTHER! *SHATTERING GLASS*”
“myeu muh? whats a myeu muh?” DARCY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH SKSHSKHSKS
man coulson thats a dick move to snatch up all of padmes shit- AND DARCYS IPOD???
loki do be looking snazzy on the throne👀 good for him. look at these fucker friends of thor tryna make him inbanish thor :/
BOOKS- on norse myth.? yeah norse myth
padme is sus of thor, and almost got em into a car crash. “god i hope you’re not crazy.” oh wait till you aee what happens
ODINS TAKING A NAP FOR THOUSNDS OF YEARS OR SUMSHIT
frigga is tryna convice loki they meant well. kinda hard too ngl. damn shield has beefed up security around this fucking hammer
oh shit electrical thunder is fucking with the shield tech once thor showed up. RAIN AND MAGIC HUMMING- thor is kicking shield’s ass- COULSON- who the fuck chooses a bow and arrow to shoot a target when they had sniper rifle- barton- HAWKEYE NVM BADASS ARROW GUY IS AMAZING
oh shit thor found miljjnor. mudfight but make it less smexy. epic momentt pogg.. its totally gonna fail him so fucking bad its gonna be funny
told you so.
now hes yelling at the sky like an insane person
AND got arrested :I
poor heimdall having to watch this all like a sad sitcom. OLDMAN STFU
“look its myeu-muh!” darcy needs to be protected at ALL COST. ohmygod they think thor is a solider from enemy lines aIshsksjskks
LOKIII- oh shit hes telling thor everything went wrong bc him and that a truce was- NVM LOKI IS TRYING THE HAMMER. YOU GOT IT LOKI
old man go save thors stupid ass. redeem yourself. bar talk is somehow wholesome. oh shit thors gotta dip outta town bc oldman said so. he didint listen to odin and ended up starting a war- OH CRAP LOKI DID LET THE FROSTY BOYS INTO ASGARD.
heimdall knows loki is causing trouble. good for loki. HA RHE OLDMAN GOT FUCKING WASTED BY THE BOOZE LIKE A COWARD.
padme is so awkward around thor. shes in looovvveee. awh thor snatched up her genius book from shield. YIGHDRISLE is such an amazing name for a tree filled with planets and worlds
DUDE DONT SHAME THE MAN FOR STRESS EATING
LOKI KNOWS HEIMDALL SNITCHED AND LET FUCKER FRIENDS THROUGH. HOLYSHIT THEY FOUND THOR SLJSOSJSKSKS
thor knows loki lied- heimdall knows loki let in the frosty boys, and is currently frozen soild by that blue cube thingy. AND NOW THE OP METAL LAZERBEAM BASTARD IS ON EARTH
OH GOD A SPEAR THROUGH THE THROAT MUST HURT LIKE A MF- SIF DONT DIE
LAZERBEAM STOP BLOWING UP BUILDINGS
dude things were getting blown up left and right but suddenly thor’s plot armor engaged and a car just flips over him and instead of going boom. standoff between lazerface and thor- whomst shall win? find out next week on: HOLYSHIT THE NORSE GODS EXIST
loki just watched thor try to give up his life and now lazerface is leav- FUCK NVM IT BITCH SLAPPED THOR SKSHSJSJSJSKKSKSJ. oH now it leaves
hammer go brrr soon? HAMMER GO BRRRRRR
PADME SAVE YOURSELF THOR JUST GOT POWERED THE FUCK UP
“oh my god” YOU JUST SAW A METAL MECH SHOOT A LAZER OUT ITS FACE AND FOUR PEOPLE IN VIKING ARMOR FIGHT. ARE YOU STILL SHOCKED???
LAZERFACE GO BOOM. THORS BACK BABYY
oh shit the frosty boys are on asgard- HEIMDALL NEEDS TO UNFREEZE AND WORK ITS MAGIC LIKE NOW
oh god the animation for some dead frosty boys got so noticable that was horrible.
TIME TO GO KICK LOKI’S ASS SKSKSJS- OHFUCK FRIGGA NOO. OHSHIT LOKI JUST MURDERED LAUGHY THE FROST KING.
lokis “ohshit thors back” face is amazing
loki hun what the fuck are you doing- stop tryna destory shit like a hero.
“I NEVER WANTED THE THRONE. I WANTED TO BE YOUR EQUAL!” my heart is torn :((
brothers fighting while a energy tree builds around him? sure why not. ohfuck loki got his ass handed to him- THOR WHY DID YOU LEAVE THE HAMMER ON HIM LIKE THAT SKSHSKSJSJSK
THOR WOKE ODIN UP BY VREAKING THE FUCKING RAINBOW BRIDGE
ODINS AWAKE AND SAVE EM AGAIN
IM CRYING LOKI JUST WANTED TO MAKE ODIN PROUD AND HE SHUT EM DOWN LIKE THAT. ODIN YOU FUCKING SUCK
awh this is making me sad i dont like this sad ending this sucks so much. loki deserved better then to die knowing odin hated him :(
heimdall is out of a job now that the bifrost is broken haha loser.
NEXT MOVIE: THE AVENGERS
ignore the misspells and the bad grammar its almost two AM by the time i finished watching and writing this up
#thor#thor movie#the mcu#marvel#marvel movies#marvel cinematic universe#LOKI WILL NEVER DO ANTHING WRONG#frosty boys#STOP BULLYING LOKI 2021#artemis rants#PROTECT DARCY AT ALL COSTS#look its myeu-muh!#padme kissed thor#LOKI DESERVES BETTER THEN TO DIE KNOWING ODIN HATED HIM
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Secret Identities
Summary: Freddie's overeager adoptive parents jump at the chance of securing a new friend for their kid. The person they have in mind is Zach, someone Freddie has not typically gotten along with. Can they settle their differences? Or will their already fragile relationship be torn asunder?
"It'll be so much fun!" his mom, or as most knew her, Violetta, squealed, pulling Freddie in for a tight hug. "I'm so glad you're hanging out with kids your age!"
"Or, at least, close to your age," Aster, or Mama as he called her, remarked. She dropped a soft kiss on his head once Violetta reluctantly let him out of the hug.
"Plus, you already know him so well- from that time you guys spent living together!"
Freddie had shared the past traumatic experiences of his life with his new mums, and they had been very supportive, sending him to therapy and making sure he had a happy and secure environment to fall back on. Unfortunately, this also meant expanding his friend group, something he generally found difficult to do. His superior intellect, while it helped him make leaps and bounds in different research projects with prominent scientists of the time, meant he struggled to relate to many other people. He had been a lot closer to Bella than he’d been to Zach, though he tolerated her since she shared his love of learning. Zach was nice enough, but not generally his taste. His mums had already met Bella and practically fallen in love; Bella’s social skills made it difficult for anyone to be repulsed by her. They’d been ecstatic by the first “friend” they’d met, so it made sense they’d jump at the opportunity for him to make another.
A phone call later, Zach was scheduled to come over that coming weekend. Freddie had spent the entire week mentally preparing for the visit. When his studies and various scientific projects hadn’t served as enough of a distraction, he decided to spend Thursday and Friday behind his closet. Shortly after moving in with his adoptive moms, he had divided his spacious closet in two - the front was his sparse wardrobe and behind was a secret compartment. Inside it was a haven to him. His prized comics made up one wall, while the other was plastered in superhero posters. A display case proudly presented the Spidey-serum along with an imitation of most of Hawkeye's arrows, and a round shield he'd started experimenting with. He picked it up and made his way to the workbench underneath a poster. He'd been experimenting with different compounds to coat the shield in that would make it significantly more durable.
Before he knew it, hours had ticked by on Friday afternoon, and his momma was calling him down to dinner. Throughout the affair, his mom eagerly asked questions about Zach. Momma was a lot less apparent with her enthusiasm, but Freddie could see her happy at the thought of his life being improved. He sighed inwardly and answered Mom's barrage of questions as genuinely as possible, trying not to let his apathy and somewhat distaste of the situation seep through.
Finally, Saturday afternoon rolled around. Freddie had spent the morning the same way he'd spent the previous two afternoons - working on the chemical compound for the mock Captain America shield.
"Freddie! He's here baby!" Mom's voice broke into his treasured workflow. Freddie groaned, tilting his head back to roll his eyes at the ceiling. Reluctantly, he traipsed downstairs. Zach was standing in the doorway taking his shoes off, his hair a much darker blond than usual, damp with a few strands dangling in front of his eyes. The boy on the doorstep grinned winningly, a sharp contrast to the sneer on the boy on the stair's face. He flicked his eyes over his mothers' faces. Mom was beaming while Momma's lips quirked into a small smirk, the equivalent of her jumping up and down in excitement.
Freddie stifled another groan. "Come on then." Zach's smile morphed in a mischievous grin. The main reason the pair tolerated one another during the apocalypse was because of the need to survive. That and Bella, who could be relied on to break up any of their fights. Zach loved getting on Freddie's nerves and judging by the smug look on his face and the exaggerated swagger he was looking forward to that afternoon. Freddie pushed open the door to his room. Without hesitation or prompting, Zach fell into the beanbag by the window. Freddie sniffed and looked Zach up and down. "You smell like chlorine."
His lanky figure sprawled out on the beanbag, Zach shrugged. "I went swimming this morning." His curly hair was in larger clumps than usual and stuck out at odd angles.
"And you didn't shower?" Freddie’s voice was full of contempt.
“I did,” the brevity of Zach’s reply irked the smaller boy.
“But you didn’t smell like chlorine before.”
The older boy shrugged again. “It’s swim season. The smell won’t go away until it’s over. Though I’m thinking of doing it the whole year this time.” His gaze lifted to the ceiling thoughtfully.
Freddie wrinkled his nose in disgust. He understood the health appeal of extreme physical exertion as sports, but he couldn’t imagine how anyone could enjoy them, or the ludicrous lengths people pursued them.
“Freddie!” his Mom hollered from downstairs.
“Coming!” he called back, before turning to Zach. “Don’t touch anything. I’ll be back soon.”
Zach waited until he heard Freddie's methodical footsteps fade downstairs before springing up from his beanbag. He dashed to the bedside table and started going through the drawers. He almost slammed them shut when they yielded nothing blackmail-worthy, the fear of Freddie hearing him stopping him. After peering under the bed, Zach sauntered to the wardrobe and poked his head inside. He almost gave up when a sliver of light caught his eye. He squeezed into the wardrobe, and, ignoring the faintly glowing keypad, swung the loose back panel open. Inside was a veritable treasure trove of posters, collectibles, and comics of various heroes. Zach grinned and whipped out his phone.
Suddenly Freddie called. "I'm back!" Zach groaned under his breath. "You'd better be in that beanbag...oh no." Freddie's quiet pacing drew up to the wardrobe. "GET OUT! I don't care what my moms will say. OUT! OUT NOW! Put your phone on the bed and stand by the door." Reluctantly, Zach retreated from the hidden room. He put his phone on the bed and went to lean on the wall by the door.
"So, you like comics," Zach said lightly.
Freddie was bright red as he tapped on the older boy's phone. "Quiet," he seethed. He handed the phone back to Zach, having gone through it, looking for photos of his treasured room. "If you tell anyone about this your reputation will be ruined before you can say 'tesseract.'"
"Okay, Sheesh. You need to chill out little man."
"Get out of my house."
"Fine, fine. What am I going to tell your moms?" He asked around the door as he started down the hall.
"That's your problem now." With that, Freddie slammed the door, clipping Zach's nose.
Zach shrugged. Once downstairs he called out, "I just got a text. I have to go, I'm so sorry. Thank you for having me in your lovely home!"
"So soon? That's a shame." The more spritely woman skidded around the corner, the quieter one following closely behind at a more stately pace. "Do come back sometime."
He grimaced at the door before turning around with a winning smile. "We'll see." He waved as he walked down the path, and, swinging one leg over his bike, called out one more time. "Bye! Have a great weekend!"
The last thing he heard before he rounded the corner was, "You too, sweetie!"
~
“So you yelled at him then kicked him from your house?” Freddie could hear the stifled laughter over the phone. After banishing Zach from his home the day before, he'd called Bella to get a second opinion on the situation.
He sighed, "Yeah. But I'm in the right! He was snooping when he wasn't supposed to!"
"I guess. Did you talk to him or did you just interrogate him?" Freddie could hear her smirk at his silence over the phone. "That's what I thought. So do you want my advice on how to fix this?"
Freddie mumbled, "I mean, I don't really want to. He's not that great of a person anyw-"
"What was that?" Bella cut him off.
"Nothing. Please help me," the plea stuck in his throat.
"I thought so." she was unbearably smug. "Now, I want you to invite him over again. Apologize, then show him the room."
"What?!" he exploded.
"Calm down and hear me out. You will show him your room and give him a comic."
"WHAT!?"
"Just follow my advice and you'll be fine." her voice was soft as if she was soothing a spooked animal.
"You know what? I don't think I will," with that, he hung up.
On the other end of the line, Bella smirked at the silent phone. "I'll give him until Friday," she said to herself.
He broke on Thursday.
~
On Thursday night, he was sitting at dinner, his issue with Zach gnawing at him. He pushed his dinner around the plate.
"Not hungry, baby?" Mom asked, concerned.
He sighed and put down his fork. "I am. I was just wondering if Zach could come over this weekend," he choked the words out.
Momma raised an eyebrow, "Are you sure? You seemed a bit te-"
Mom cut her off with an elbow to her gut. "Of course, honey! I'll text his family after dinner. But no guarantees. We don't know how busy he is."
"Thanks." Freddie went back to his dinner, zoning out of the conversation while reliving last Saturday and planning and replanning the coming weekend.
Luckily, Zach was free that weekend. He came over the same time as the week before, in much the same state - damp, messy hair, chlorine smell, cocky attitude. He steeled himself against the older boy's smug and brazen attitude and managed not to snap on multiple occasions as they tramped up to his room.
"I never thought I'd be back here," remarked Zach incredulously as he strode up and sat on the beanbag he'd been on the week before.
"Mmm." Freddie was on the bed, head in his hands, feet dangling, his legs not long enough to brush the ground. He was seriously reconsidering inviting over the other boy again.
Zach sat forward in the beanbag, "I think it's safe to assume you didn't just invite me here to hang out."
The smaller boy sighed and threw himself backward onto his bed. He grabbed his pillow and screamed into it. Zach winced from his seat but didn't move, looking on with more curiosity. Freddie heaved himself up, a few strands of his carefully gelled back inky hair astray and began speaking again, his eyes slit, "I brought you here to propose a truce." He plowed through the stunned, heavy silence. "I thought over our last interaction and -" he was cut off with a cough from Zach which clumsily masked "totally Bella". Freddie glared down at him. "And I want to attempt to improve the terms between us, so," he scooched over to his bedside table and opened a drawer, flipping up a secret compartment and pulling out three well-loved comics - Spiderman, Ironman, and Guardians of the Galaxy, some of Freddie's favorites. The bottom corner was thin and a little frayed, and the spines were white with creases but other than that, they were in pristine condition. "I'm going to lend you some of my graphic novels."
Zach snorted, "You mean comics?"
"Sure," huffed Freddie. "Read them, and then you can understand why I like them. But understand this." He hopped down from the bed and stalked over to where Zach was lounging on the beanbag. He grabbed the collar of the bigger boy's shirt and yanked it upward, lifting Zach's indifferent gaze to meet his own smoldering eyes. Zach gulped, never having been so scared of someone so much smaller than him. "If you crease, tear or so much as think of damaging those comics, your life will be ruined before you can say 'vibranium.'" With that, he released his grip on the shirt.
"Yes, sir," Zach playfully saluted Freddie, who rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "So now what?"
Freddie shrugged, "Do what you like. Leave, stay, I don't care. I'll be working on a project in the room. Don't disturb me. However," he paused at the doorway of the closet. "I'd advise you to stay here at least twenty to thirty minutes to avoid Mom's suspicion. Unless you want her to perform an investigation on your social life to try and determine why you're so flighty…"
"Got it, thanks," said Zach, grateful. He pulled out his phone and played around for a bit.
About half an hour later, he called out he was leaving. Miraculously, Freddie emerged from his "lab", if only to give him a plastic bag for the comics. With a final threat over the safety of the lent material, he sent Zach off, whose trip home was uneventful.
~
Once he arrived home, Zach thumped up to his room. He pulled out one of the comics and flipped through the pages, skimming the fading words and pops of color. He rolled his eyes, dismissing the childish trinkets. He pulled out the rest of the comics and stuffed them into his school bag, promising himself that he’d read them later, and pulled out his homework.
At his desk, he sighed and slumped forward, resting his head on the hard, cool wood. His leg bounced with unspent energy. Sitting up again, he attempted two more questions, but his mind remained fuzzy and blank. He leaned back on his chair, eyeing his window and the tree branch that brushed it. Resigning himself to an unproductive afternoon, he jumped up and made his way to the window. Leaping with practiced ease, he swung his way to the floor, mucking around with a basketball until it was too dark to play.
The comics sat unbothered until Tuesday afternoon, at which point they were smushed and creased by a tennis racket. They settled further into his bag and drifted further into the back of Zach’s head, the upcoming swim tournament, and tennis trials taking priority in his week. Any time not spent on homework or sports practice was on his phone, winding down for the day by texting friends and playing video games.
The next two weeks flew by in a similar pattern, the comics lay forgotten at the bottom of his bag, keeping half a year’s worth of forgotten permission slips company. Finally, a free weekend rolled around, so Zach made his way over to Freddie’s house, the plastic bag the younger boy had given him dangling carelessly from his bicycle handles. As he pulled up to the gate, Zach glimpsed a small black head duck away from the partially closed blinds. He smirked. Pulling up to the front door, he leaned his bike on sturdier shrubbery and walked up to the door and knocked twice before ringing the doorbell, obeying the flowy writing on the flowery sign underneath the house number. He heard rhythmic tapping approach the door before it was flung open and he was enveloped by the more eager of Freddie’s mums. She brushed his cheeks with her own, making kissing sounds like in French greeting, as the other stood to the side, stifling laughter at Zach’s reddening face, his discomfort at the overwhelming attention apparent. When he finally escaped, he gave the pair a two-fingered salute before dashing upstairs. He burst into Freddie’s room, panting. “Wow, your mom can be a bit…”
“Much, I know,” Freddie sighed. “Now sit. Tell me how you enjoyed the simpler side of my refined taste.”
“Um,” Zach awkwardly rubbed the back of his head. “I didn’t read any.”
“You’re kidding me.” Zach shook his head, making Freddie huff exasperatedly. “You had two weeks. Surely you had some free time.”
Shrugging, Zach said, “I did. I just spent it on other things.”
“Did you at least start one?”
The older boy shook his head.
“Maybe we can find something more your taste. Pass the ones I lent you to me.”
“You’re really trying to make this work, aren’t you,” remarked Zach as he passed the bag over.
“I guess. I don’t like giving up, and besides, I have nothing better to d- what did you do?” Freddie’s casual statement darkened as he peered at the contents of the bag. Inside, the comics were warped and horribly creased. “Ironman” even had a rip in the back cover. Freddie took a deep shuddering breath and pinned the damaged comics on his closet doors with his shaking hands. “Where were these for the past fortnight?” His voice quavered with pent up rage.
“In my school bag. They must've been pushed to the bottom and jostled around a bit. Sorry, I didn’t realize they meant so much to you.”
Freddie let out a burst of hollow laughter, “Surely you can’t be serious, I threatened you multiple times, and I have an entire room dedicated to those. How much more could someone care about something?”
Zach scuffed the floor from the bed. “Not much, I guess. I really am sorry. I got distracted during the week and didn’t pay them enough attention. Is there anything I can do to help?”
Freddie paused in the preparation of a rant. The older boy seemed genuinely remorseful. I might seriously regret this, he thought, as he decided to give Zach another chance. “N-no. I’ll patch them up myself, I don’t trust you not to ruin them more.” Zach winced. Freddie continued, “I think I have the perfect comic for you. And this time, it’s staying in my room so it doesn’t get damaged and so I can make sure you’re reading it. I ought to have a copy, so maybe…” he trailed off, continuing his speculations in his head as he disappeared into the back room. In the silent bedroom, Zach got up from the bed, which creaked in relief from the removed strain, and made himself comfortable on the beanbag.
Finally, Freddie emerged from the room, brandishing identical comics that declared “Captain America.” He handed him the comic before flopping onto the bed himself and opening his own. They sat in silence for five minutes until Freddie spoke up, "Get off your phone."
"What are you talking about?" The telltale click of the screen shutting off made Freddie smirk at Zach's faux innocent statement.
"I'm not deaf I heard you turn it off just now."
"Fine," Zach huffed. "How did you know anyway?"
"You weren't turning pages. And five minutes is plenty of time to finish at least one page, especially for a comic. Besides, the beginning has action and suspense and you didn't react to anything."
"Huh," Zach mused.
"Please just try. I know you don't read much, but this is mostly pictures. Even your small brain ought to be able to process it. Maybe you can put your phone on the floor?" Freddie's voice pitched up at his last statement.
Zach rolled his eyes and slid his phone to the ground, deciding to humor the small boy. His efforts seemed genuine and his earnestness was sweet.
Sure enough, not three minutes later, Zach was enraptured in Steve Roger's story. Freddie smirked on the bed which widened into a smug grin at every gasp, occasionally sneaking glances at Zach's awed face. A little over half an hour later, Zach carefully tossed the comic at Freddie's feet, landing it on the other copy. "Please tell me you have more," Zach's voice was taut with hope.
Freddie scoffed, a triumphant grin plastered across his face, "Didn't you see my room? I have almost every single comic. Not all of them are on display, though."
The rest of that afternoon was spent in near silence. It was punctured by a few gasps, giggles, and triumphant whoops and some of the sweeter victories. Miraculously, Zach finished all the Captain America comics and started Spiderman.
Halfway through the first Spiderman comic, Zach looked outside for the first time in hours. "Geez! It's dark already?"
"Huh," Freddie was unsurprised. Spending hours rereading comics and working on his favorite projects made him lose track of time more often than not, so sudden unnoticed hours flying by wasn't out of the ordinary.
"I should probably go," Zach was forlorn, before perking up slightly. "Do you mind if I take a few comics home."
Zach sighed, lifting his gaze to the ceiling thoughtfully. "I suppose. You seem to see the value in the graphic novels now, so you probably won't damage them." His eyes drifted back to the older boy, who was on the edge of his seat in anticipation. "Fine, take them. But come back sooner this time so you haven't fewer chances to ruin them."
"Of course!" Zach reassured the boy sprawled out on the bed, "There's no way any of these will be so much as creased under my watchful eye." He winked.
Freddie rolled his eyes. "What day this week will you come over?"
"Umm… I don't have any fr-" Zach started to explain.
"Make time. You are coming over."
Zach huffed, exasperated. "I'd forgotten," he muttered under his breath, "how annoying you can be."
Freddie ignored the comment as he emerged from the secret room with two comics, handing them to Zach, who was still on the beanbag. "Now leave before I change my mind."
"You got it chief," Zach gave him a two-fingered salute as he strode out the room, pausing at the door as his movement in his peripheral vision caused him to whip around, catching Freddie with his tongue out. He raised an eyebrow at him, causing the tips of his ears to redden. Zach snorted.
"Go," spluttered Freddie.
Zach flew down the stairs two at a time. "I'm going now," he hollered, "thanks for having me!"
Aster and Violetta, as they insisted he address them, rounded the corner. The only reason Violetta wasn't skipping around the corner ten paces ahead of her wife was Aster's hand on her shoulder, holding her back.
"Surely, you're not planning on cycling home alone, in the dark?" Violetta simpered.
"Uh, I guess?" replied Zach.
"Absolutely not! It's not safe for someone your age." Violetta rebuked.
"It's really not," agreed Aster. "We'll drive you home."
"Oh, no," Zach protested, finishing lacing his shoes. "It's fine. I know my way, it'll be fine."
"Nonsense," insisted Violetta. "Our car has plenty of room for both you and your bike."
Zach sighed, knowing they wouldn't let up until he caved. "Okay. Thank you so much."
"It's no trouble."
~
Over text, Zach managed to organize to come over on Wednesday. He burst through Freddie's bedroom door to an empty room. "Hello? Freddie?" He heard sniggering from somewhere in the room. He peeked into the comic room and rifled through the wardrobe in front.
"Look up, moron," He heard from above him. Freddie was crouched against the ceiling. "Pass the comics up." Zach handed the comics up for inspection before laying back on the floor to avoid straining his neck. "Not bad," Freddie remarked. "You didn't do any damage. Well, no major damage. I guess I shouldn't be surprised you're one of the heathens that doggy-ears pages." He glared down at Zach, who shrugged.
Sensing the building annoyance, Zach quickly changed the subject. He hauled himself off the floor and sat on the bed, tilting his head to focus on Freddie, who was still in the middle of the roof. "So now I know where that's from. I knew you couldn't come up with good original ideas."
"Hey!" Freddie protested, before suggesting "I have a few other projects back there. One in particular I think you'll like."
Zach's eyes shone with excitement. "What are you waiting for then?"
Freddie grinned back before motioning to the beanbag. "Would you mind pulling that over? I don't feel like walking down the walls." Once the cushioning system was below him, Freddie jumped hard and curled himself into a ball, landing with an "oomph". Picking himself up, he strode into the back room, so light on his feet he was practically skipping. He returned with a large metal circle and several souped-up arrows. "Catch," he called, frisbeeing the disk, Zach diving to catch it, saving it from clattering to the ground, as the throw fell short.
He examined it, flipping it over and spinning it a few times. "Is this?"
Freddie nodded earnestly, "A replica of Cap's shield. I'm experimenting with a chemical compound that will increase its durability. And these," he brandished the arrows, "are replicas of Hawkeye's arrows. I'm pretty sure you've seen him once or twice by now."
"I have. Hey...can I try the Spiderman thing out were using?"
Freddie hesitated, "Well, it's a bit of a pain to make, so I generally save it for special occasions."
"Like scaring me?" scoffed Zach.
"Shut up and read," Freddie tossed him the next issue of Spiderman, confidant in the athlete's catching ability to make up for his poor hand-eye coordination.
They were barely four pages in before Zach spoke up, "I wish there was something I could do to bring another...hero item to life."
"Other than being my lab rat to test the supersoldier serum and other stuff, there's not much more you're good for."
They sat in silence for a little longer before Freddie made a suggestion. "Maybe an Avengers comic can spark an idea in your weak brain."
Zach protested weakly as he accepted the comic, eager to get sucked into another hero's journey. To his delight, he found six heroes to invest in. As he read, he turned over different possibilities for weapons to bring to life. Finally, something clicked. "Hey, Freddie?"
"What?" The small boy poked his head out of the makeshift lab, where he was working on the shield.
"What about an Ironman suit?"
"No," he dismissed. "It's way too complicated. As much as I hate to admit it, it's out of my depth."
"Why don't we ask Bella?" Zach heard something clatter to the ground at his statement. He smirked, pleased he'd come up with something Freddie hadn't.
"Grab my phone, now." Freddie dashed out of the room and launched himself onto the bed. Zach grabbed it from the bedside table and sat next to him. After a quick squabble over who would ask, the phone ended up between them on speaker.
"Hey, boys," Bella answered after the second ring.
"Wh- how did you know?" Zach asked.
"Simple. Freddie doesn't normally call me on a weekday and I knew you two would reconcile."
"Oh."
"And I heard rumors you'd gotten into superheroes recently, which only confirmed my suspicions."
"You are a woman of many talents, Anabella."
"Thanks. Now," she cut off Freddie who was about to speak, "What do you need?"
Freddie held back his initial question, "Who said we needed something?"
"You never call me unless you need something. That goes for both of you."
Zach said sheepishly, "That's fair."
Freddie sighed, "Yeah, we do. Can you make an Ironman suit?"
"That's a tall order," she commented. "As friendly as I am with you two, that's going to require funding or hands-on help. Preferably both."
"Okay. When can you get started?"
The line was silent for a moment as she pondered the proposition further. "This coming break. I'm swamped with work right now, and I'm sure you are too, Zach."
He winced. "Yeah, I am."
A faint tapping and rustling filtered across the line. "If you send the money soon, I should be able to get the material to start early. It might even be ready before the break if everything goes according to plan."
"Thank you, Bella," they chorused.
She chuckled, "No problem boys. Bye." She hung up.
The pair exchanged fervent looks, eyes brimming with eager fire.
"This is going to be awesome."
#writing#fiction#original characters#freddie moore#zachary williamson#my writing#short story#a new infection#a new infection au#cof(fee)#crown of flowers#technically speaking since they have roles here#the perfect family#anabella silvette
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Meta: Claire's relationship with Barney
HELLO, HI, YOU HAVE JUST UNLOCKED AN ESSAY THAT IS PROBABLY JUST A LITTLE TOO LONG, if I do say so myself and given that I wrote it, I would say you should listen.
Anyway, the Bartons are actually my favorite comic siblings to ever exist – probably actually my two favorite comic characters ever ever. Their relationship is so dysfunctional and a little broken, yet held together by shitty guardians and a rough childhood. It’s kinda beautiful, how after everything that happened to each other, they’re still close?? Like they trust each other, tease each other, they have each other’s back?? The relationship between Clint and Barney is truly one of my favorite representations of a pair of siblings who didn’t have the easiest life, mainly because, like without the superhero nonsense, their relationship is actually very similar to my own relationship with my siblings – a severely messed up ride or die that might end with one of us killing each other.
Yet, this question is what does Barney’s and Claire’s relationship look like, not Barney’s and Clint, which despite how little it would change, does change some things. To figure out what it changes though, I’d like to head to what their relationship is like, in canon, for me. I know that the fandom has it’s own view of Barney Barton – I don’t agree with it nor particularly like it, so it’s probably best if I explain how I look at their relationship.
So Barney Barton, born Charles Bernard Barton, is the eldest of the two – no ages because this is the comics and characters can’t have canon ages ?? I guess it’ll break the suspension of disbelief but like shrugs – and he showed up in the comics in 1969, before this, he never existed. Of course this is during the age of the 60’s so most superheros didn’t really like have a life outside of the comics they were in so it’s not that big of a deal, but like still, Marvel just creates this character to be Clint’s brother, tells us he’s a racketeer that’s been on the Avenger’s radar for a while, and then kills him in the same issue, only revealing at the end that he was an undercover FBI agent.
(yeah, they gave Clint a family and then killed said family right away, sounds so similar, y’know kinda like the movie-verse which gave clint a family with very little characterization and then snapped them – no wonder I love Laura so much)
Anyway, later issues of Clint’s will explain that their parents were abusive, they died and Clint and Barney ran away from the orphanage they were in when they were like teenagers – this would be retconned to young teenagers, then implied to be younger as of the Hawkeye (2012) series, which puts Clint sleeping under the tents at age 9 (src), which could or could not imply them being their already - it’s whatever, like it’s just gonna get retconned again. Running away to the circus always puts strain on their relationship no matter what age they are though, mainly due to Clint receiving training from their mutual “father figure” Jacques DuQuesne and Barney becoming jealous; a completely and natural thing according to all child psych I’ve read, it creates an environment that allows one kid to be the “golden child” and the other to be the “scapegoat” – now of course, we don’t know much about the dynamics of their full childhood, Marvel hates sharing any information like that, but we can extrapolate a fair amount.
(also, just so everyone knows, this jealousy did not pave the way for their relationship in later comics, namely Blindspot. In that it’s very clearly stated that Barney was found by Egghead to still be slightly alive. He was then held onto, for nefarious reasons, in a healing chamber, until he was found by Baron Zemo years later who then manipulated Barney against his brother so that Baron Zemo could get his revenge against Clint Barton. I’ll say it again, Barney was used against his own brother by an evil guy who hated Clint because Clint slept with Zemo’s wife; that is where the “Cain and Abel” dynamic comes from – not childhood)
Back on the tangentially related topic I was writing about. This jealousy grows until Jacques DuQuesne leaves after Clint finds out about his illegal dealings ( though the all new hawkeye actually kinda, maybe, a little, I’m unsure, retcons this with Clint finding out about it much earlier, when he finds out about Jacques having Barney stealing from people and places and finds the hidden cache of a gun, money and some other things under Jacques’ bed??? I don’t know, I’m now a little confused if Jacques still fucks off thanks to that comic ) - of course, this is after Jacques chases Clint through the circus, cutting the high wire Clint tried to hide on. Barney tells Clint, while his brother is in the hospital (and in literally a comic that got retconned basically) that he should’ve kept his mouth shut and stuck by Jacques no matter what (can we say that that sounds like trauma?? because guess what, psych 101 says that that’s kinda sounding like trauma since Jacques was trash to these kids, like literally, fuck Jacques DuQuesne – all my friends hate him – he’s an interesting villain but fuck the whitewashing of his bullshit).
This doesn’t sour their relationship at all – no seriously, it doesn’t which uh shows that neither of them really take each other at face value anymore – and they go back to the circus, Clint heals up, starts working with Buck (a man currently being written out of the comics world which is a shame because he’s kinda important but kinda not) and then Barney decides he wants out. With Barney in the army, Clint continues down the crime street and well, now that we’ve got a bit of background (over 800 words of background), let’s get onto what their relationship is really like for Claire and Barney.
Simply put, like in the comic relationship with Clint and Barney, Barney is a protective older brother, he taught Claire how to fight and aim, how to patch up simple bruises and cuts, taught her to drink her first shot (at like age fourteen, but like what do you expect when that boy was drinking much younger???). He was her first teacher, her best teacher – yes their relationship got complicated; it’s Claire when isn’t her relationships complicated – but at the end of the day, he helped shape her into who she was.
Less simply put…
He is her everything—in all the P L A T O N I C (I’m emphasizing platonic because please don’t take this in the romantic sense, they’re fucked up but not like that; I am not Marvel, I don’t ship siblings and pretend that shit is fine.) sense of the word—he was her guardian when all the guardians around her failed to properly take care of her; he was her brother who teased her and made fun of her; he was her best friend who understood what she went through, the only other person who did; he taught her as much schooling as she would sit down and listen to, he taught her how to cook herself some basic food.
He was a father, a mother, a brother, a best friend, a moral compass – which is why when he went off to the Army, Claire found it a betrayal. She hated him for the time that he was gone, though she forgave him not long before she first shot him because she could understand that to him (the little purple box in the third panel: Carnival of Death, of course this is how Barney would remember things) the circus was never a home, just another temporary place to stay.
(btw this is “shooting barney” thing that is part of my main verse, is canon. Clint shot his brother, who was working undercover as a bodyguard, while Clint was breaking into a mansion with the aforementioned soon-to-be-retconned-I’m-sure-of-it Buck Chisholm, which led to Buck shooting Clint in the shoulder when he refused to leave his brother’s body and pinning him to a tree – I don’t quite recall how Clint got out of getting arrested, I’m pretty sure it never explained, but I’m rusty and not really up for pulling out some old comics to read up on)
(I lied, here’s the comic strip: 1. 2. Clint “somehow” managed to get free, take his brother to the hospital and then leave??? yeah sure. )
Anyway, let’s get on with it. So if that was their relationship when they were younger, what is it like now?? Now that Claire has found a place – a sturdy, yet unsteady, comfortable, yet spartan, to call her own –
( and yes, this sounds angsty, but Clint has issues accepting that he is where he wants to be – Clint is always running, even when standing completely still. It’s a trauma response to his shitty childhood where they never stayed in one place for too long; even when their parents were alive, they moved from above the family butcher shop to the Barton farm. Barney had it too, but apparently a relationship helped with that (and okay, look I love Simone and Barney, but that part in All New Hawkeye rubbed me wrong as a fellow wandering child turned rootless adult; the guy needs therapy, not just a relationship – but then again, Barney Barton does not get agency or a personality outside of Clint Barton; his life must revolve around Clint Barton, even when he was on the Dark Avengers, it was about Clint – and yeah, they’re brothers, “two sides of the same coin”, and all that jazz but like I’ve got three sisters and a brother, I’m my own person at the end of the day – something Barney Barton cannot say, which means ending his story on the note of retirement and falling in love is just the best thing so they don’t have to keep finding a reason to try to remember that Clint has a brother I’ll stop with the rant, I’m sorry.) )
where does a man who no longer has to be a father, mother, brother, best friend, and moral compass stand when his sister has all that? Well, for the most part, he stands next to her – in my main verse at least. After he has come back wrong (Buffy much?), he finds his place standing beside his sister, no longer solely protecting her from the world (as he had always done because the world is not kind to lost little girls or boys), because he’s learned that she can, for the most part, protect herself, and Claire finds herself less on a lower standing (less of a burden in her eyes, less of a child in need of comfort) with her brother, but more like an equal, something that’s a bit of a new situation for the both of them.
In truth, Claire’s relationship with Barney is complicated and messy but it’s hers, and when you have something that’s complicated and messy, you have to figure it out, and that’s what, in my canon, she’s doing. Sure Barney isn’t around a lot - he’s got his own shit to figure out - but he’s her brother, and she loves him, and he loves her and they’re trying to get to a place where they don’t accidentally poke the trauma they’ve got and ruin a good thing.
......
Okay, so like did any of this make sense??? I don’t know. I guess, to sum it up really quick, in my main verse - and most of my canon - I’d say Claire’s relationship with Barney is slightly yet not really awkward – it’s awkward because once upon a time, it was simple. Yet at the same time, it’s a really important relationship because Claire was shaped by her brother (and of course all those shitty adults because there are no good mentors in the Marvel world, not for kids at least).
Idk, this is really just me rambling. Like I should just state that tis is just Mun taking all the retcons that Marvel stuck her babies through and trying to make sense of them along with a healthy dose of a smattering of psychology shoved all about because unlike Marvel, I have no desire to ignore the C-PTSD/PTSD that seems to follow both boys around thanks to their childhood – of course this crazy amount of words actually kinda ignores all the trauma they have as adults, but that’s a whole nother post for some other day
I also know that I carry some ~controversial ~ barney barton views - ie. he’s not a villain and that him and clint share a close relationship, that he isn’t dumb muscle (bitch got a 1350 SAT score with like minimal schooling, i’d like to see you do that) and that he wasn’t a shit older brother when they were kids - i’m not apologizing for them. not at all. i will never apologize for them. characters are more than one dimensional and if i gotta be the one to wade through all this vague ass bullshit to get those other two dimensions then i’m going to do just that, which i have done.
plus it doesn’t even matter because through all the retcons clint and barney has gone through, this is what their relationship is; a fucked up dysfunctional sibling relationship gone off the rails when Barney was brought back from the dead and manipulated/brainwashed into hating his brother. it eventually got better, how? we’ve got none of that, but it did and and at the end of the day, as clint said:
#murder-popsicle#/ i am so sorry this is so long#it's over 2000 words cause i couldn't shut up#long post#general trauma tw#child abuse tw#⤗ your friendly neighborhood wine aunt : bubbles speaks ❛ ooc ❜#⤗ the past is only a story : headcanons ❛ meta ❜#⤗ i am a leaf on the queue : queue ❛ claire barton ❜#⤗ sometimes your moral compass gets fucked up a little : barney barton ❛ brother barton❜
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A (brief) review of every Donald Sutherland movie (so far)
I’m not coping well with quarantine at all and no one else seems to be either (which makes me feel a bit better) So what started out of boredom back over christmas break has turned into a quest to find and watch every Donald Sutherland movie ever. Probably not my best idea since a lot of them are very old and hard to find and would need to be bought online (which isn't an option right now.) Don’t ask me why, this kinda just happened and I’m not gonna fight it. So stick around for an unprofessional review of a very professional actor’s long film career.
(if anyone has any suggestions or knows where to find more hmu)
M*A*S*H*
Ah talk about a movie that didn’t age well (but neither did Holiday Inn and we still watch that) I’m not here to bash on it for being problematic because apart from the way they treated Houlihan, I genuinely loved this movie. It had be rolling the whole time just like the show and I still catch myself whistling like Hawkeye all the time. Probably still like the show better and Alan Alda’s Hawkeye (sorry Donald) but its definitely been a go to when I’m having a rough day.
Kelly’s Heroes
I think this was the first movie of his I ever saw as a little girl and I remember being very confused. (since it didn’t match my dad’s military stories at all) so this ended up being the first one I went out of my way to hunt down and watch and sorry to Clint Eastwood but Donald stole this movie from literally everyone. He’s hilarious, he’s sexy, he steals the show and it’s definitely one of his more underrated movies (the movie itself is a bit long) which is a damn shame since he (literally) died filming this one. (if you don’t know the story, look it up its wild)
Alex in Wonderland
Wow, who knew he could be such a convincing asshole! At least he becomes aware of it by the end of the film but I just felt so lost by the end. Like ,what did I watch, what happens now? Not one of my favorites but definitely interesting and a sure product of the early 70s. Overall, he does have a lot of good scene (a scene with THE Federico Fellini) that are sometimes light-hearted, dumb, cute, irritating, and just...what? The relationship between him, his wife, and children is probably the only redeeming factor since its pretty accurate for how his actions strain his relationships. I am gonna be honest though, I only watched this one to see him as a long haired hippie 😂 (sorry).
Klute
Leave it to Jane Fonda to remind me why I’m bisexual (I wish she wasn’t always a prostitute) Although there was a lot more of her and a lot less of him, even though he is John Klute. I am an absolute sucker for those old black and white noir movies and this is no different. It leaves some feelings to be desired at times (Donald apparently felt the same way) but you can really tell there’s a fascinating chemistry between him and Jane (because there actually was) Overall the story was entertaining but the character’s themselves seemed somewhat drab. I wish we got to know more about them and had more scenes with more emotion apart from just the sex and love scenes. Oh well, it was still a pretty damn good movie and I’d definitely watch it again if I got the chance.
Lady Ice
Basically Magnum before Magnum was even a thing. Now just because a movie is bad doesn’t mean it can’t be entertaining. I love the whole Miami Vice vibe I get from this and again, huge fan of private investigators, detectives and dirty schemes. His acting might not be exemplary but I don’t even care. The movie is fun and not every movie has to be deep and meaningful. Nothing wrong with just watching a movie for the hell of it. And that moustache, it’s my kryptonite. 😆
Don’t Look Now
If you haven’t seen this movie, stop reading my bs and go watch it right now. (its free on crackle) This is such a good movie I could make a whole post on it alone. Donald and Julie Christie (I’m still not over her either) put so much into every scene, giving us such a beautiful relationship that’s been fraught with tragedy. Every scene is beautiful and eerie and enchanting Iloveitsomuch!!! I don’t wanna spoil too much because the ending turns everything on its head. I’m not sure if this is meant to be a horror movie but it really walks that uncanny valley with the whole setting of Venice in it’s off season, the dark corridors, creepy premonitions. I will spoil this, I love how for once, the man is the psychic instead of the woman, which is a trope that waaaaaay over done. AND THE SCANDAL! Okay sex scenes in movie isn't exactly scandalous but this one was surprisingly realistic (no they didn’t actually have sex) so everyone in the 70s pitched a hissy fit over it and I can’t understand why. It’s by far the most realistic and beautiful sex scene I’ve ever watch, hats off to Donald and Julie. God Bless Nicholas Roeg for this masterpiece, aaaaahhh just go watch it its so good!
Fellini’s Casanova
Alright but bear with me on this. I think I had a religious experience while watching this movie. I was overly exhausted and had my eye on it for a while said ‘fuck it let’s watch something weird.’ This what actually started by quarantine marathon (how appropriate) and I can safely say, I think this is the most beautiful, most grotesque, most enchantingly beautiful and yet dark and bizarre movies I’ve ever seen. Donald makes such a convincing 18t century venetian lover and they really went all out with his appearance, acting and the scenery of the whole movie. Everyone in the film seems to genuinely enjoyed everything they’re doing (which says a lot they do some crazy shit in this one) and the whole time, everything is erriley whimsical, almost like a fever dream (which is what this film might have been I dunno). And the fact it spans the entirety of Casanova’s life, from his highest point to his absolute lowest decent into squalor just proves that Fellini holds nothing back AT ALL. Again, no spoilers (I don’t really think I can spoil this film) but there’s just copious amounts of sex and its just plain strange but if you find it in your heart to give it a try, please do. If you’re not sure about it that’s fine definitely not for everyone. However I highly recommend Fellini’s other works. (go watch La Strada)
Invasion of the Bodysnatchers
Hahaha oh man I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen this movie. My friends and I in college had a horror movie night and this one seriously freaked out my roommate (i’m so sorry). I love me some sci-fi (I run a star trek blog) and this not only gave me lots of Donald but also Leonard Nimoy, (along with a very young Jeff Goldblum) so yes, this is now one of my favorite sci-fi movies (I did a film analysis on it too). I don’t recommend watching it in quarantine unless you’re into freaking yourself about a global pandemic. I will say, this movie is an anomaly since I think it might be the only movie that is not only better than its remake, but also better than the book (which I also read) This one gives us Donald (and his moustache) playing of all things, a health inspector (I’m dying) whos put into some creepy scenarios of apocalyptic proportions. This is one of those horror movies that’s fun without being funny. It’s got plenty of drama and awkwardness between to characters while also reaching it’s cult classic status. All the actors in this film manage to give such a convincing performance that you can’t help but feel like you’re right there with the characters, which makes for a fun and terrifying ride. 10/10 would scare my roommate again.
The Great Train Robbery
Donald Sutherland AND Sean Connery? Sounds like a great pair right? Well they are, sort of. Okay this movie looks like a typical british drama, buuuuut I’m not so sure about this one. Donald is pretty great in this one and so is Sean, but I’m just very confused if it’s trying to be serious or funny? The plot itself makes sense and its pretty good but the execution is just...what? Oh well, Donald and Sean make an entertaining pair with their odd “train heist” I felt this movie would have done much better if it went for either one side or the other instead of jumping all over the place, and it played out much more like a soap opera. It’s not bad though but its not a favorite of mine.
Bear Island
Okay I’ve been pretty nice so far, but this...the only real redeeming part of this movie is Donald and his beard. Which is such a shame because I feel like this could have been SUCH a good movie. The story itself is really good and enthralling but somebody somewhere dropped the ball. No, they didn’t drop it. They threw it off a cliff. Nothing about this movie makes sense, most everyone’s acting is subpar, and I don’t blame them because the script was probably the main offender of this film. Even Donald’s acting is uncharacteristically bad. I know shoot me, criticized his acting. It’s just so strange to see what could have easily been a fantastic film. Someone send this to Philip Kaufman and ask for a remake because this one needs it.
Ordinary People
Oh God, this movie. This movie means so much to me. Again, watched it with my roommate, we sobbed like children and its now a must see in our group. The fact that Donald wasn’t even nominated for an oscar for this film is a travesty. A story like this is something that in a way I’ve lived myself. Everyone’s acting in this film is superb and as someone who would know, yes, all of this is very really and very heart wrenching to watch. I don’t mean to get sappy or anything, but I have been Calvin Jarrett, I (and I’m sure others) have been that mediator who eventually is broken by the two fighting forces. Watching his eventual collapse is so surreal and wow this movie really broke me in some spots. Uhg god this movie, I wanna cry just thinking about it. I’d totally watch it but I’ll just spend the whole time wanting to hug him.
Eye of the Needle
If any of you know me personally, you’ll know I’m absolutely terrified of needles, so this might not have been the best movie for me to watch, but I had no idea what I was getting myself into. This whole movie is actually pretty fantastic. For once, Donald plays a bad guy, but you can almost root for him (if he wasn’t a nazi) I felt so conflicted because while yes I wanted him to take her away from her horrible husband, hes a damn dirty Nazi, and we don’t stan. Of course, Donald’s character is extremely charming but I’m left wondering if his character really did have feelings for Kate Nelligan. I have a feeling that I could really run with this story. This one is a thrilling story with a thick plot that tears its characters apart. I can’t help but love it.
Crackers
Fight me, I thought it was funny. Not really but this is one of those “entertaining but not really good” movies. Donald’s character is...well, he reminds me a lot of most of my exes. He’s just down on his luck, he’s not a bad guy. Yeah that sums up how I feel about his character. However, the movie overall is pretty damn funny. At least it knows it’s a comedy and it even has a sweet(ish) ending. I will say its not great, but there is a good scene with Donald falling flat on his ass which was so worth the whole rest of the movie. This one is still on my quarantine go to for when I just wanna forget about life for a while.
Rosary Murders
So this little gem I kinda just watched on a whim thinking it would be some campy horror movie that was very pro-catholic and woooweee was I wrong. I loved this movie so much I ended up watching it twice, two nights in a row. It really was a thrilling movie with a plot thicker than pea soup, all while throwing some (slight) shade at the catholic church. This movie goes less for the horror side of things and more for the shock and drama and it does it well. Not to mention he makes one hell of a cute priest. I loved the hell out of this one and I’m glad i decided on this one the other night. I might even watch it again who knows.
Pride and Prejudice
Everyone in this movie is neurotic as hell except for Donald Sutherland and Keira Knightly. Sorry I was never a huge Jane Austen fan but I admire her ability to write hell of a good slow burn and that exactly what this is. Hell most of you know what this movie is about so I’m not gonna talk about it too much. Its one of those movies everyone else seems to have seen and I haven’t so mom and I sat down and watched it together. She just laughed as I sat there yelling at the TV, waiting for an exasperated Donald to come on. His final scene though, so sweet. I did like how the movie showed a father daughter relationship that wasn’t toxic (not like the last one) but I was kinda over the whole song and dance after a while. I’m sure most people think its a really good movie but I just don’t get it.
The Hunger Games (All of them)
As I understand it, this movie actually means a lot to Donald, as it does to a lot of people, and that he really enjoyed working with Jennifer Lawrence, so that’s nice. Yes I’ve seen all three (four) movies, read all the books and I couldn’t think of anyone else to better play Katniss Everdeen’s antithesis than someone like Donald. I feel like this is one of those roles that was just made for him. He was such a scary and venomous villain that played so well off of the main protagonist. Uhg I really do love the Hunger Games Series, it was a huge part of my childhood, I just hate how the fans destroy people who love the main villain, like many fandoms do (looking at you star trek). I wish I could just enjoy these movies in peace without everyone being so polarized on them.
Oh wow there’s definitely gonna be a part two but as of now, this is all I got. I’ve got a long way to go and (with the way things are looking here in the U.S.) I’ve got plenty of time to do so. I really do enjoy doing these kinds of things so if you want me to watch and ramble about any other movies (no, it doesn’t have to have Donald Sutherland) I’m gonna be in quarantine for a while, so let’s at least do something fun to pass the time. 😊
#Donald Sutherland#this brings me joy#Im gonna laugh if I actually watch all his movies#mash#hunger games#pride and prejudice#ordinary people#I'm not gonna tag every movie wed be here all day
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Fighting For You (Chapter 1) - Trials of Mana Fanfiction
Summary: Ever since stepping into Moonlight Town Mintas, Duran has been plagued with dreams of shadows and whispering voices that leaves his companions worried. When they learn that numerous swordsmen have disappeared under mysterious circumstances, Hawkeye and Kevin fear that Duran will be next. Duran, however, wants to get to the bottom of it…
Pairings: Eventual Hawkeye/Duran
AN: What am I doing? I have no idea, but I’m having fun all the same~ First chapter is kinda short, but the following chapters will definitely be longer.
Also, a quick note before we begin. All italic words within quotation marks mean that the Elementals/Faerie are speaking with Duran telepathically/mentally. Because of course the Elementals will want to help Duran with his fledging love-life. And let’s face it; he could use all the help he can get!
Now, hope you enjoy!
Chapter 1:
It wasn’t fair…
How could they abandon me?
After everything I have done for them.
I gave them my loyalty. My dedication. My devotion.
All my skills were for them. All my training. My sword. My talents.
Everything.
Then I lost my skills. Injured in place of another. My life in place of another.
The injuries I sustained should not have been mine. I took their place, like a good knight should.
In exchange for my life, I lost the ability to use a sword.
In exchange for my life, I lost everything.
My skills. My sword. My purpose. My meaning.
Useless. A knight is meaningless without a sword.
I was no longer of use. To anyone.
So they abandoned me.
Everything…I gave them everything…
And they threw me away. Without a second glance. Without mercy.
After everything I’ve done for them. For her. For everyone.
Anger, betrayal, bitterness.
Revenge.
I will get my skills back. I will make them pay. Make her pay.
No matter what…
… … … … …
The heat of the desert sun was relentless as Duran lowered the Ferry Flute to his side and waited for the ever reliable Vuscav to show. The sea lapping at their ankles offered some reprieve from the searing heat, but not enough in his opinion. The sooner they entered cooler waters, the better.
“Let’s head to Mintas next,” Kevin insisted. “Village of beastmen, but peaceful. They like humans.”
Duran nodded his head as Vuscav trundled into the shallows, eyes wide and all seeing. “Sounds good. Just two more Elementals to go.”
Soon, they could finally open the portal to the Isle of Mana. Reach the Sword of Mana. And where he could finally make that Crimson Wizard pay for everything he had done!
Pushing that thought aside for the time being, Duran waded out into the shallows to hop aboard Vuscav’s back.
“Don’t get too close to the edge of the shell, Kevin,” Duran chided the energetic beastman protectively as they all clambered aboard.
“It’s ok,” Kevin insisted. “I can swim. Good at it.”
“I’d rather not have you race Vuscav right now,” Duran pointed out.
Kevin, however, furrowed his brow and folded his arms across his chest. “Race?” he muttered and after a brief silence nodded his head sharply. “That sounds fun. Can I race Vuscav later?”
Duran immediately regretted his choice of words and winced. “Ah, not yet. Maybe…maybe later, yeah. You, ah, know the way to Mintas, right? Why not tell Vuscav where to go?”
Kevin unwound his arms and nodded his head. “Yes. I’ll do that.” He turned on his heel and bounded forward without a care to perch himself atop of Vuscav’s head.
Taking a half step forward, Duran threw out an arm in preparation to order the boy back on deck, as it were, but sighed and touched his forehead. “Just, don’t fall into the water, alright?”
“Ok!”
He had to smile as he shook his head when Vascav began to swim forward under Kevin’s guidance. That smile faded into a look of concern, however, when he turned his attention to his other companion.
Hawkeye was quieter than usual, though Duran couldn’t really blame him. He sat with his back toward them, knees bent as he casually rested his elbows. His gaze lingered on the distancing horizon of Sirhtan and despite the distance between them, Duran could see that he wore an expression of contemplativeness. Sombre yet serene in some way.
He was probably thinking about Jessica.
At that thought, Duran felt his stomach suddenly twist into a knot and he tightened his jaw.
It wasn’t the first time he had experienced such a reaction. He experienced it multiple times as they journeyed through the desert. And only when Jessica was mentioned or seen.
He didn’t understand why, though; Jessica seemed nice, and she obviously cared for Hawkeye in return. And she was the sister to his best friend, so obviously he would care for her greatly. After all, he entered this journey with the soul purpose of rescuing her. If he didn’t care for her, he wouldn’t have bothered, right?
So why the twinge of…annoyance? Anger?
“Jealousy!”
The perky, cheery voice of Undine resounded within Duran’s mind and he unintentionally snapped his head up in response. His reaction resulted in a soft giggle from the back of his mind and he couldn’t help but frown.
Jealousy? That couldn’t be right. What was there to be jealous of?
“You felt the same when Reisz was around, yes?” Undine suddenly asked.
As when she did, Duran felt that twinge of…something again. In the centre of his chest. Like an ache. And again, he was baffled as to why. Reisz was capable, skilled, and a dedicated leader. She had been nothing but polite and civil. There was literally no reason why she would evoke such…frustrations in him.
“And you only felt that way when Hawkeye was around?” Undine continued to interrogate him.
And, unfortunately, he couldn’t rightfully deny that. When he spoke with Reisz alone, he found their conversations intriguing. He admired her inner strength in the face of adversary, and he genuinely wished her luck on her mission to rescue her beloved brother. She was a genuinely good person and she didn’t deserve any of the hardships forced upon her.
But he did feel a sting of annoyance whenever Hawkeye appeared to speak with her. To flirt with her.
He might just be feeling protective. Although, it was also if he didn’t like the attention Hawkeye gave. Attention toward…someone else?
“Boy,” Gnome laughed a little too boisterously. “Sure is a shame you’re not as sharp as your sword.”
Duran immediately felt insulted and indignant. What was that supposed to mean? Was Gnome insulting his swordsmanship?!
“Hush,” Undine chided her fellow Elemental quickly. “Leave him be. These emotions are obviously new to him.”
Duran sighed aloud and scratched his head. Emotions? Did she mean that jealousy she spoke off before? He had never been jealous of anyone in his life, so why now?
Wait…how did Undine know about the events that occurred with Reisz and the Citadel?
“Oh, don’t worry; Faerie filled me in on everything!”
That wasn’t exactly the answer Duran expected. He frowned and quirked his head to the side slightly. Filled in on what exactly?
“Th-the journey we’re on, of course!” Faerie was quick to respond.
Oh, ok, that made sense.
As the chatter of Elementals subsided for a moment, Duran turned his attention back to Hawkeye. Only to find him in the same position; staring wistfully at the far horizon.
“You should speak with him,” Undine piped up. “You’re obviously worried about him.”
Honestly, Duran couldn’t deny that, and he would like to. About what, though? He didn’t know what to say to him about what happened. Nothing he couldn’t say that hadn’t already been said.
Still, he had to admit that he was curious as to why Hawkeye chose to continue to journey with them. Jessica was safe, free of her curse, though the ramifications of carrying such a burden was harsh. He had every right to wish to stay behind and watch over her. The poor girl was in a fragile state.
Although, wanting revenge against Belladonna was also a very important reason to continue. To ensure that the curse had indeed been lifted and she wasn’t in any danger.
He had been quiet for a while now. Could he be silently regretting his decision to continue?
“You ok there, Duran?”
Duran snapped out of his musings when he heard Hawkeye’s voice. When he opened his eyes, not knowing when he had closed them, he found said thief directly in front of him. Leaning forward slightly to look at him straight in the eyes, his hands on his hips, and a somewhat suspicious expression on his face.
“Huh? What?” Duran muttered in surprise as he scooted back.
“You’ve been staring at me,” Hawkeye explained as he leaned back. He then pushed back his hair in a flamboyant manner, something he did often. “Not to say that I’m not used to it, with these striking looks, but any particular reason why for the stare off?”
“O-oh, sorry about that,” Duran muttered as he rubbed the back of his head. “The Elementals were chatting in my head.”
“Ah,” Hawkeye said with understanding. “Plenty of room there.”
Duran idly nodded his head. “Right and-hey!”
Hawkeye threw his head back on a laugh for a moment at his indignation before he flopped down next to Duran on the back of Vuscav. He rested on his side and leaned on his elbow, to which he propped his chin casually within his hand.
“Seriously, though, why the chatter?” Hawkeye asked.
“Well, I was, I mean we were just curious,” Duran began, ignoring the disapproving tsk from Faerie, “if you’re ok with continuing with this journey…and all that?”
“Hm? Wondering if I’m regretting my decision not to stay?” Hawkeye questioned; his tone surprisingly casual.
Duran simply nodded his head.
“I said that I would see this through until the end,” Hawkeye replied without hesitation as he flopped onto his back and cushioned his head with his hands. “And I mean that. So sorry, but you’re stuck with me for now.”
That brought a wave of relief and Duran smiled. He lowered himself onto his back to stare up at the blue sky, too, content in simply watching as the clouds drift by as they moved toward their next destination.
“Awww,” Undine suddenly cooed. “I feel as though this trip will prove to be life-changing in positive ways!”
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This is the whs anon again!! (i abbreviated it!!!finally!!) Shame on a billboard was so GOOD!!! From Kate and Nat's way of taking care of Clint, to Bucky's apology and the whole 'making a fool of myself' thing. Also, you're so good at writing those little ways in which we come to know Clint's insecure, I'm so glad he didn't just forgive him when he first apologized. And Sam!! And the way you incorporated starktech! And the throwing pebbles! Thank you for this, honestly. Was def a mood lifter.
-- WARNING: LATEST FIC SPOILERS --It’s abbreviated! Congratulations. Kate and Natasha have wildly different ways of caring about Clint but they do care nonetheless. They’re good friends. Gotta love ‘em. Clint’s relieved that Bucky’s not sleeping with anyone else but it still scared him - I mean, that’s a big lie.
Still, he kind of gets it because Bucky’s relationship with his career is wildly different to Clint’s. Clint IS Hawkeye, his stage persona is sewn in on his soul, he loves the performing and the crowds and the music. Bucky’s not like that - he hates all of it and the music was just some effort at achieving catharsis that blew out of proportion. It’s not part of him the way it is with Clint.
Bucky doesn’t like being the Winter Soldier, but he likes being with Clint. He’d throw it all away in a second because it means nothing in comparison to being with Clint, and Clint starts to realize that during the first chapter but it doesn’t really cement in his brain until the second.
Sam! I love Sam so much. He doesn’t have a huge role here but he appears again nonetheless, because I need more Sam. His tattoos are very nice. StarkTech has appeared a few times in the fic, including Clint’s hearing aids and Natasha’s part time job in her twenties - Tony’s very much within this ‘verse, although not as a musician.
Clint getting brained with a pebble is great. Bucky is horrified. I am amused.Thank you for coming back, anon! Glad to lift the mood.
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Proof Of Innocence ch. 4
The final chapter is finally here. I’ve honestly had so much fun writing this small series and I hope you guys have enjoyed it! Thank you guys so much for the support for this, it makes me want to continue writing more small series in the future!
You can read the previous chapters down below:
Chapter one
Chapter two
Chapter three
“What is it you want to talk about?"
My voice was low and threatening and it ended up sounding like a growl.
"My, my, no need to show such hostility, I'm here to only talk, besides, if I wanted to fight you, you'd already be lying in a pool of your own blood by now."
I watched as he got up from his seat on the rubble and began heading in my direction. I, in turn, made sure to keep a good distance between us in case he were to try anything.
"Alright, so what is it you want to talk about."
"You, to be more precise, do you remember a man named Maximillian?"
"Of course, he's my father, but how do you know him?"
"Ah, he was a friend of mine, I've known him for a couple of years."
"Impossible. My father would never associate with the likes of you."
"Oh? Pray tell, what makes you come to that conclusion?"
"Oh please, as if I have to explain. I mean look at you, there's not a single good bone in your body, I could sense it since the day I first saw you."
"So you think your father was some kind of saint?"
"I never said that. I know my father had gotten himself into bad situations because of his past, but he would never stoop down to your level."
"See." The man inched closer. "That's where you're mistaken, young lady. Your father's past is filled with nothing but darkness. He was part of an organization I worked in and was one of the higher-ups. He only got to that position by carrying out the tasks given to him, do you even know how many people he's murdered?"
"W-What?"
"He's killed countless people and torn apart villages with the snap of his fingers. But you see, he made a mistake when he took on a mission at Graceus. He fell in love and soon he had a family, he let that get the better of him, thus, he became vulnerable. But you know something? I bet in his final seconds of life, he was happy he had a daughter to follow in his footsteps and trail down the path of darkness."
"What the hell are you blathering about?"
As I spoke, I summoned my staff and got into a defensive stance; ready to deliver a blow, should it come down to it.
"You are the only child out of his other six that even have dark magic in your veins, you reek of forbidden magic, face it, you're evil, a child born from a monster. Isn't that why the rest of your family abandoned you? Or perhaps it's the reason for your exile from Graceus?"
"Shut the hell up!"
"Oh? Can't handle the truth? Can't handle that one day that darkness will one day take over you and plunge you into nothingness? Fear not though, once it happens, we here at Hawkeye will welcome you into our organization with open arms."
"No, I just can't handle that annoying mouth of yours!"
I was furious as I lunged at him, landing a heavy attack on him which sent him flying into the air, then, in what seemed like slow motion, I conjured up chains which wrapped around his body before yanking; sending him flying into the ground below. Debris from the stone ground went flying, including dust which clouded my vision.
I was on high alert now and I tightly gripped my staff and waited for the dust to settle before making my next move.
"I gotta say, you really are something."
Just as the dust had settled, more came flying up as a large object soared into the air. When I looked up, I noticed that the man, who should have sustained injuries, was now hovering in the air with a pair of jet black wings.
"My attacks..."
"Your attacks were weak, child. Now, gaze before me, Draven and see how a real attack should be!"
I let out a scream as I dove to the ground to avoid getting hit. Draven had sent fatal wind-slice attacks my way. After having nearly dodged them, I watched as they went soaring into the cave wall on the other side, it had split many of the old pillars and stone in half like it was nothing.
"My advice? Take up my offer, or die here."
"I refuse!"
I could feel my arm burning and in the next moment, a flurry of light arrows began raining down on Draven, who of course, brushed them away like they were nothing.
"I won't take up your damn offer, no matter what happens and I refuse to die here!"
Besides...I made a promise to someone special to me...
Hey, come back in one piece, okay?
No promises..
This was for not only Viggo's sake, but for the sake of Gedonelune as well. If I didn't put up a fight here, then I knew the tensions between Gedonelune and Graceus would amp up and an impending war could come true!
My heart burned with desire as I sent flurries of attacks one after another. Each one had barely made a scratch on him, or they never even reached him, I was beginning to run out of options and mana,,,
"Now come on, is that all you got!"
Charging down at me, Draven managed to grab me by the neck and send me flying into a nearby pillar. The moment my back came into contact, I let out a cry before sinking to the floor in pain. In the process, my staff had gone flying elsewhere, leaving me pretty vulnerable to whatever attack was going to come next.
"Persephone Onyx."
Draven's voice echoed from above. Even though I couldn't get up, I knew he was towering over me his hand already holding a charged attack which he was probably going to use to finish me off.
"I'm going to give you one last chance. Join us or meet your fate right here in these ruins."
"Stick it up your ass Draven..."
"I see, so that's how this is going to be. Fine then. Farewell."
Just as he was about to unleash his attack, a familiar voice echoed in the ruins
"Hey, assclown. If you want a fight, then come and fight me!"
"Viggo..?"
B-But how?!
"Oh? You must be the misfit that I hear so much about. Shame I haven't really gotten to meet you until now. At least I'll have fun using you as some target practice before obliterating your friend."
Draven's attack, that was once meant for me, was now hurdling towards Viggo who stood there like nothing was going on. He smirked and grabbed out his pipe before covering the area in smoke. It was unknown if he had been hit or not, surely if he had then there would have been a verbal warning of it.
There was one, but it wasn't from Viggo, it was from Draven who was currently getting pummeled by smoke fists in all different directions. Without being able to see, he was at the mercy of the smoke, which was playing in Viggo's favor. Even when the smoke had died down, Viggo still sent flurries of his own attacks at Draven, but not all were with magic. In fact, Viggo was pulling his weight with his own personal punches, landing one hit after another to the point where he had even sent Draven flying,
When Draven began throwing his own, they were perfectly matched in strength until...
"I've had enough of this!"
With a flap of his wings, Draven managed to send a wind-slice, much like the one he had sent at me, but at Viggo. Unlike me, however, Viggo....couldn't avoid it in time and was hit. Things moved in slow motion, one minute, Viggo was standing there and the next, he too was sent into one of the crumbling marble pillars. The only difference was that I heard a snapping sound, followed by a heart-shattering cry.
I pushed myself up with what little strength I had and looked over at where Viggo was sent flying. All I saw was Viggo's body surrounded by rubble, while Draven looked on with a satisfied smile.
For the first time in forever, I found myself on the verge of breaking down, my eyes were burning with tears, my chest hurt and my whole body was shaking, *No...he can't be dead...*.I kept telling myself this over and over while gripping my head and tightly shutting my eyes. Within a few moments of staying like this, I felt my hair being tugged upwards, along with my body where I came face to face with Draven.
"Have you finally given up?"
"No..."
"You've got to be kidding me."
He began to laugh loudly before dropping me back down to the ground, where I landed with a *thud*
"You see Draven..."
I slowly began to pick myself back up once more; this time I used the remaining pillar as support to help me stand up on my own.
"I'm done with your bullshit..."
For some reason, the tattoo on my arm was beginning to burn brightly, causing my shoulder to throb with a dulled pain. Meanwhile, dark smoke began to dance around my feet until they were shrouded in the darkness itself. I could see only red at this point and as I held my hands, I began to speak an ancient incantation which made Draven's eyes go wide.
My veins were now clearly visible and were covered with thorned tattoo's that ran up my arms completely.
"Draven, my word of advice for you? Run..."
The moment I smiled, black-smoked covered spiked chains came hurtling towards him at high speeds, each one was thorn-like tipped and dug into his skin the moment they wrapped around him. He was in mid-flight when he was caught and was now desperately trying to free himself from the restraints.
When I saw this, I quickly jumped into action and rushed over to a pile of rubble, jumping off of it and then kicking myself off of the wall right next to it, which sent me into the air backward. With perfect timing, I managed to swing my foot downwards while mid-flip, fiercely kicking him down to the ground below where he let out a groan of pain.
I hovered in the air, right above his body for a few seconds before slowly floating down to the ground, right in front of him. He was coughing and spitting out dust from his mouth. He tried lifting his head and with a swing of my hand, I sent his face back down to the ground below.
"I'm done messing around Draven."
"So...you going to kill me now, or what?"
I had to stop and think about that question for a moment...I...I had never killed anyone before, how could I even think about killing someone now? Sure, he had tried to kill me, Viggo and quite possibly others and yet...I don't think I could bring myself to kill him.
"I knew it, you're weak!"
As he lunged at me, the chains that bounded him had begun to tear and shred his entrapped wings. I ended up grabbing his arm and twisting it before kneeing him hard in the jaw; which ended up knocking him out cold. I was breathing heavily now as I staggered backward, almost tripping on my own two feet.
I looked down at him and then, with a wave of my hand, more chains appeared and now wrapped around his wrists. I closed my eyes and felt a cool breeze wash over me as I mana drained him just a little bit. Yes, mana bending and draining were forbidden uses of magic, but...I had to do it, I had no other choice...
Once I felt a little bit more energy wash over me, I quickly ran over to the pile of rubble where Viggo had been, picking up my staff that had been previously thrown elsewhere during the fight. When I got to the rubble. I was prepared for the worst, but I was relieved to know that he was alive. He was beaten up pretty badly and was pretty much out cold. But at least he was alive.
"I wish I could do something for you.."
Right as I spoke, I noticed my shoulder was glowing, on it, two new pieces appeared; another rose petal and a thorned vine that wrapped around the incomplete markings. A shimmering light began to rain down from it and land on Viggo and I watched on with tears as he opened his eyes.
"Seph? Is that you?"
"Viggo! You're awake-- and your arm!"
Shock was plastered on my face as I looked down at his arm, it had once been broken horribly, but now...
"Huh? Did something happen to my arm?"
"Yes, wait, do you not remember anything that just happened?"
"I remember breaking out from the detention chambers because I could sense you were in danger. I asked people in town if they had seen you and some elderly man told me where you were after I told him that you were in trouble. When I came down here, I saw you in pretty bad shape and that guy...he was the one I got a glance at before, but I can't remember what happened after that."
"Well...you saved me, Viggo..." I smiled and gently touched his cheek
"Did I? Does that mean I get a kiss?"
"Not a chance, idiot."
"Worth a shot."
Viggo let out a pained chuckle, it must have been from all the bruises. The magic may have saved his arm, but it didn't heal up the cuts and bruises.
"Oh yeah, I pulled something off that lunatic."
"Huh- wait...is that!?"
Viggo pulled out a small sphere that gave off a great deal of magical energy, probably enough magic to equal that of hundred elite magical knights at the Ministry.
"This must be the thing that was stolen from the MInistry! We have to hurry and take this to them!"
"That won't be necessary. We can go ahead and take that from you right now."
"Huh?"
When I looked back at the new voice, I saw a rather tall man with golden hair coming my way. He was being accompanied by two other ministry members.
Standing up, I faced the three new people and I held out the sphere in my hand.
"After you take us, you have to drop all charges that were put against Viggo and I. Your culprit has already been caught."
"Who said you had charges against you?"
"What...but.."
"I should have mentioned that earlier." Viggo spoke up "When I broke out of the detention chamber, the so-called ministry members that threw us in, were nothing more than fakes. They turned to smoke the minute I attacked them."
"So then that means you...and you" I pointed at Klaus and Vincent "Weren't actually around?"
"No, we and some of the prefects were busy investigating the recent spike in unstable magic, I'm sure you've seen the effects of it, through the terrible weather we've had."
"Yeah," Vincent spoke up this time. "Someone had purposefully tampered with it and we had to go out and find out who. We've all been gone for at least a few days."
"Hang on a second" I put my hands to my head and rubbed gently. "So, then that means, the Zeus, Lucious, and Hiro that I talked to?"
"Must have been fakes created to talk and act like them."
"Why go through so much trouble for all of this?"
"Must be scared of us, Sephie." Viggo laughed
"Well, I'm not sure of everything just yet, but given that the sphere in your hand is not only one of the many peace offering between Graceus and Gedonelune, but also a magic stabilizer for the land's magic. It helps maintain and protect the ancient magic in the land from spilling out."
"So if someone bad were to have used this for evil..."
"Yes, it very well may have destroyed Gedonelune and many other lands."
"Now.." Klaus cleared his throat and opened the palm of his hand. "May I please have it, so I may return it to its rightful place."
"Oh, yeah, sorry."
I quickly handed the sphere over to Klaus who quickly but it into some magical container.
"Now, about this culprit that you said you caught?"
"Oh yeah, he's over...there?"
When I looked over, there was no sign of Draven except blood and a few of his feathers from his wings that were torn out from the struggle.
"I swear he was right here!"
"I see. Well, then, you four over there, don't just stand there, start gathering evidence!"
Klaus began barking orders at a few others that had come down with him, then he sighed and placed a hand to his forehead.
"I swear, I don't get paid enough for this. Anyways, I should probably go ahead and thank you for helping us retrieve what was stolen. You've done a great service for us, so thank you, Persephone."
"I can't take all the credit, Viggo played a part to. If he hadn't shown up, then I...I might have been killed down here."
"I see. Viggo, thank you for your contribution to this case."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just don't tell anyone else about this, I'll start looking like a good guy."
I burst out laughing at his comment and afterward, Viggo and I were both escorted back onto Academy grounds and taken into the infirmary for our sustained injuries.
--------------------------------
After about a day, we were discharged and allowed to go about our days like usual, the only difference was that we had been exempted for classes for a few days after everything that had happened.
Now, after what seemed like forever, Viggo and I were out sitting by our usual spot.
"Thought you should know that the Ministry found some kind of pin lying on the ground in the ruins."
"Really?"
"Yeah, they know some more info on the guy, they just don't know his whereabouts right now. Though, considering the condition we left him in, he probably couldn't have gone far."
"I hope not. If he has, then that means more trouble."
"You seem worried."
"Yeah, worried that I'll have to do more work."
"Viggo gave a small snort. "You sound like this Day Class student I know who comes into the detention chamber sometimes."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. Oh, hey Seph. There's something I wanted to ask you back there in the ruins."
"What?"
"Why are you such an idiot?"
"Seriously..."
"Yes, seriously. I get that you were doing this to clear my name and all, but you went to some serious lengths to achieve that."
"Is there something wrong with that? So what? I wanted to prove you were innocent."
"Look...you're really not making this easy for me to say."
"Well, then improve on your wording."
"Alright, you want me to be straightforward and ask then?"
"Uh, yeah?"
"Fine, do you like me?"
"Well, yeah of course I do, you're probably one the coolest people here."
"Not like that, you idiot."
"Hey!"
"You're the dense one here, okay. See, I'm asking if you love me."
Oh dear gods, he actually said it. My face became hot and suddenly I was acting like those love-struck fools in the Day Class during the Love Holiday.
"Where is this coming from, exactly?"
"Well, to be honest, I had been wanting to bring this up to you for a little while. Probably around the time, I started liking you."
"Wait, hold on, you like me?"
"Yeah? Got a problem with it."
"Not at all, I like you too-"
Did....did I really just say that out loud? I felt like hiding away in a dark cave at this point and I was becoming embarrassed, so much so that I was beginning to find it hard looking into his eyes. This wasn't like me at all, normally I was cool and collected, why...why was I feeling this way? Were my true feelings for Viggo beginning to show themselves? I had a million thoughts running through my head which all came to a standstill when I felt Viggo's hand wrap around mine.
I gently squeezed his hand back as we sat in silence. I had spent so many years, wanting to feel love again and I...I felt it with Viggo. He made me feel safer than I had ever felt before. But, I'd never tell him that...probably.
"Hey! Persepho- Oho? We got a couple of lovebirds here."
"Shut up, Zeus."
"Yeah, what do you want?"
"Listen, we need you in the Headmaster's office, Schuyler wants to see you."
"The headmaster?"
Viggo and I looked at one another before getting up and following Zeus to the Headmaster's office. We didn't know what to expect and quite frankly, I was a little scared considering that I had broken quite a few rules during the recent events. I could feel my heart practically leap into my throat when Zeus knocked on the door and alerted Schuyler of our arrival. I felt even more uneasy when Viggo let go of my hand.
"Come in."
Schuyler's voice came from inside and Zeus opened the door and walked in, with us following close behind him.
"I brought her, just like you asked. But Viggo here refused to stay behind."
"Listen, if she's in trouble then don't make her have all the blame."
"No one is in trouble here. In fact, I wanted you to come and see me so I could give you a few things. I noticed that you have not worn an official Night Class uniform since you've been here. So, I'm here to provide you with one."
"That won't be necessary."
"What?"
"I have one, already/ It needs to be sewn up a little bit but it's still usable. Besides, it means a lot to me because it was given to me by someone special."
I looked over and noticed that Viggo was now looking away, avoiding any and all eye contact with me.
"I see, well then. With that uniform, I expect you to be wearing this at all times."
Schuyler pulled out a box and sat it on the desk; inside was a special Night Class pin.
"Is that..."
"Yes, this means you are an official deputy prefect for the Night Class, due to the recent incident, there was a unanimous vote to have you be a part of the prefect team. I hope to see good things from you Miss Onyx. Do try and stay out of trouble though."
"Way to go Seph, look at you climbing the ranks."
"Now that we've gotten all of this taken care of, you may be all dismissed back to your regular duties."
Schuyler shooed us out of the office and we all left. Zeus had split off from us and went on his own while Viggo and I walked down the hallway together.
"I'm proud of you, I mean hey, who knows, you might be a real prefect soon."
"Don't get your hopes up too much."
I laughed and then smiled when Viggo grabbed my hand again.
After all the things that had just happened, I was beyond relieved to return to life here at the Academy. Things have changed since then though, I've had to take on more responsibilities, like balancing my academics and my deputy prefect duties. It was going to be a challenge, but hey, challenges are what makes life more exciting, right?
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i can hear the echoes of the past
written by: @havocsss and @hyuroiofficial
summary: Roy had lost - traded - his vision, in exchange for this monster to wear Hughes’ skin [an illustrated fic]
read on ao3
ship: hyuroi | rating: t | words: 3187 | tags: hyuroi, canon character death, blind!roy, homunculus!hughes, emotional manipulation, implied alcohol abuse, one-sided attraction
an: this is an illustrated fic on ao3. all the fantastic artwork has been created by the brilliant mind of @hyuroiofficial. you can find their tumblr post containing the artwork here
“Yo, Roy!”
Roy froze in place. His head whipped around of its own accord, trying to see where the voice was coming from, but it was a pointless search. His eyesight was gone and no matter how hard he willed himself to see, it would never happen.
But still… That jovial greeting. That voice… Roy knew it.
It was not the first time he thought he’d heard it. The voice was something that haunted his nearly every waking moment. With gritted teeth, Roy forced himself to continue forward.
It’s not real. Stop it! His brain shouted, but it did nothing to stop his mind from conjuring the sound of the late Maes Hughes. Roy would scream and yell until he went mad with it, trying to rid himself of such a cruel trick.
There were times when the deep reverberation of Hughes’ imagined voice echoing through the confines of his skull reassured Roy, pushed him forward and fueled him, but now Roy became completely unsettled by it. The uncomfortable feeling coiled inside of his gut, threatening to crawl up his spine and arrest his movements completely.
“Ignoring me? Well, that’s just rude,” Hughes scoffed playfully.
“Shut up,” Roy muttered through his teeth. Not real, not real, not real. It was a mantra that sounded in time with the loud patter of his footsteps.
His body was viciously jerked to the side. Vicious for Roy, because of his blindness. Being beyond the gate had seen to that. His cane dropped from his grasp in surprise, hitting the ground with a loud clatter. Instinctively he reached for his pocket to get his gloves, but a hand quickly batted it away.
Hughes tutted. “As if I didn’t expect a move like that,” he chuckled. “I’ve known you too long, Roy.”
This was not Maes Hughes. He was dead -
“Wh - What?” Roy gasped in pain as the grip on his arm grew stronger. There was something sharp on his bicep, threatening to cut through his clothes with a heavy stinging pressure. It might have already sliced through. If only I could see!
Jerking his arm free from the grasp, Roy stumbled as the arm pushed him forward. It left him off balance and unaware of what direction he was facing. From the smell of damp and food waste, they could be in an alleyway. However, without his sight and after being thrown so off kilter by the sudden supposed appearance of his very dead friend, Roy was unable to determine where the exit was. He cursed his lack of attention to his surroundings. He used to be a military man, his lack of sight leading to his early retirement. The military had no use for a dog that couldn’t see. But with Roy’s past military experience he shouldn’t have been reduced to such useless stature, regardless of who was in front of him and no matter how much they used to mean to Roy.
“Hey.” Roy could almost picture the grin on this person’s face. It was evident in their light, flirty tone.
“What do you want?” Roy growled. He wouldn’t have someone trying to cruelly trick him into thinking his best friend, his… They had been so much more than best friends at one point… The memories of what had been - what could have been if they’d only allowed it to blossom further - flooded Roy. It weaved through his ribs like ivy and strangled the oxygen from his lungs, leaving him suddenly breathless.
“It’s me, Hughes!”
Roy froze again, stricken with the pain that name gave him. He was foolish to think he could hear Hughes’ name without experiencing agony. No, keep it together!
“Just wanted to stop by and see how you’re doing.”
“Maes Hughes is dead,” Roy replied, forcing a deadly calm to take over his entire being. Just underneath the surface of his skin, anger was beginning to bubble. His fury was a fiery thing, like the flames of his alchemy, as it hotly licked through his veins. How dare this person try to impersonate Hughes -
Roy grunted as his back hit something solid and hard, the air temporarily knocked out of him with the shock of it. A hand gripped his hip, but not painfully, nearly gentle, yet in a mocking fashion. A thumb slipped underneath his suit jacket, caressing Roy’s skin softly through his white shirt. Roy shivered despite himself. The other hand tangled in Roy’s hair as he voiced a protest, only for it to be swallowed by wanton lips. Teeth nipped at Roy’s bottom lip and he groaned.
He knew that mouth. The kiss was all too reminiscent of something that had been precious to Roy, no matter how short lived that something had been.
“Now are you convinced?” Hughes murmured quietly. Roy shook as Hughes’ hand caressed the skin of his jaw, crawling slowly up to tangle in Roy’s hair. But… The nails were sharp. They dug into his scalp with a whisper - with a threat - of pain. Yet where Hughes’ touch had always been kind, this touch taunted him, bordering on cruelty. “Humans have been known to say they always remember a touch of a lover.”
Maes Hughes is dead. You were at his funeral.
Roy shoved the man off and away from him, wiping the back of his hand over his swollen lips. The teeth that had nipped at him had not been kind. In the spur of the moment, the remembrance of his past lover’s touch, Roy had been lost to it. Now, his lips stung.
“Wh… What are you?” Roy whispered. He cursed his inability to see. He needed to verify what was happening with his own eyes. Despite his distrust, hope was building in his chest, a fruitless thing. Feelings that had long lain dormant were beginning to rebloom, like a flower in spring.
“It’s me, Roy. It’s Maes.” Hughes pleaded all false promises.
Roy shook his head. “He’s dead. He died. I was at the funeral. I tried…” Bile stopped him from talking further, bitter and thick on his tongue. The guilt and the shame of what he’d done haunting him.
“I know you attempted the transmutation,” Hughes replied. Roy heard him step closer and his body tensed, every muscle pulled taunt with encroaching panic.
He had to attempt it, his grief had been too palatable, a world without Hughes too heavy a burden to bear. The loss of Hughes had consumed him, pushed him, and left Roy recollecting everything he’d learned on human transmutation years ago to finally put it into action.
“And I know it failed. Or could it be considered a failure, if I’m here now? Regardless, it’s all because of you, so thank you. And…” Roy knew that sickening smirk was back. “I thought I’d show you it was really me.” Hughes’ voice was low and soft, a nearly inaudible whisper that left Roy leaning nearer. Almost like it had been when they shared tangled limbs, lips, and breaths back in academy…
They’d never had much more than that, nothing more than youthful foolish passion. Or so Roy told himself. But it didn’t stop the feelings he held for Hughes from developing further. Nothing could stop that. Nothing could stop the way his heart beat hard against his ribcage every time Maes Hughes smiled at him or slung a muscular arm across Roy’s shoulder. Or when Hughes was so close Roy could smell the coffee on his breath. They were feelings Roy forced himself to swallow. They would not further his goal and would only torment him.
He was unsure if Hughes knew of his feelings for him and how deeply they were rooted. Obviously, Hughes had made his choice and he’d married Gracia. Roy respected that and would support his decision completely, because Hughes’ happiness was of the utmost importance. But it didn’t stop Roy from loving him, from aching and yearning alone at night, a once full bottle of whisky in his weakened grasp. Anything Roy could get, whether it was friendship or simply being an acquaintance due to their past, Roy would take, would eagerly devour. He was always thankful Hughes had decided to keep him in his life.
“I can’t trust that… Or you,” Roy admitted in a whisper.
“I know you can’t,” Hughes replied casually. It sounded like he shrugged. “But it was a nice way to try to convince you. Probably the best way, actually, seeing as you were about to set me alight.”
Roy’s blood ran cold at the reminder. That simmering anger was making itself known again, spilling forth into the forefront of his mind. It coursed through him quickly, almost leaving him breathless. A reminder that this can’t be real. Not in the way he wanted it to be. Not in the way his alcohol riddled brain dreamed of.
He’d never seen his failed transmutation. He couldn’t after what the gate took from him. Hawkeye had cleared it away for him. She told him what it was like and that grotesque image he’d created from her description would be burned into his mind for the rest of his days. Another horror added to the long list of those he’d cultivated already.
You tried the transmutation. Maes Hughes is dead.
“You’re not real,” Roy muttered, shaking his head, resolute in his denial. Hughes sighed heavily. “What have you done -?” Roy growled.
“Jeez, Roy. I haven’t done anything. It’s me. Hughes. Well,” he added the smug tone returning to the conversation. Roy’s nauseous stomach rolled with it. “Not exactly. And I prefer the name Lust now. It’s got a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”
“What?” Roy paled.
“Yeah, I like it! Okay, maybe this will convince you. In the academy, we used to sneak away to the guard tower and kiss until we couldn’t breathe anymore.” His voice grew closer, like he was approaching slowly.
Or like a lion stalking its prey.
If it were possible, Roy paled further, suddenly cold. He remembered it clearly and always would, in the way the memories were just as much a blessing as a curse. The feel of Hughes’ calloused palms framing his face, the adrenaline that coursed through Roy’s veins at the thought of getting caught. They’d been young and reckless, eighteen, hidden away in the empty tower as moonlight painted their skin silver.
“Hughes was very aware of your feelings for him, but downplayed it. Then, he met and married his wife.” If Roy hadn’t been shaking, he would have smacked the smirk off this thing’s face. “He left you behind, choosing her over you. But he never forgot. He kept you in his life, kept you close, just to see if you’d ever snap. He knew you wanted to.” Hughes’ voice dropped low. Dangerously so. Roy’s breath hitched when he felt Hughes’ hot words ghost over the skin of his face. “He always admired your self control,” Hughes chuckled.
“That’s a lie. You’re not Hughes,” Roy whispered, sweat collecting anxiously at the nape of his neck. Hughes would never be so manipulative or callous towards him. Yet still it pained Roy to hear.
“In a way… No, I guess I’m not. But I’m so much better.” He said violently, the smirk reappearing in his tone.
“Lieutenant Colonel… Hughes?”
Roy stiffened. The voice came from behind him. It sounded so frightened, so shocked.
Edward and Alphonse.
Roy had been so distracted he hadn’t heard the boys approach.
“Hey, kids,” Hughes greeted.
“Wh…” The clank of metal shifting signalled Al’s armored steps. He stopped dead in his tracks a few feet away. Roy didn’t blame him. If Roy could see Hughes, he would have had the same reaction. But Roy had lost - traded - his vision, in exchange for this monster to wear Hughes’ skin.
“What are you?” Edward barked, immediately on the defensive.
“Ed?” Alphonse asked quietly. Surprise still laced his tone as he tried to recover from his shock.
“Look at his clothes, Al. And that tattoo. What are you doing?” Ed repeated, raising his voice to call over to Hughes.
“I think you can guess. I imagine you already know,” Hughes replied, his tone full of smug cruelty.
“Mustang, get away from him. Please!” Alphonse begged.
It made sense they’d connected the dots right away. Hughes must be wearing the homunculus’ style of clothing. And the tattoo… Roy’s stomach flipped, sickeningly. He swallowed hard against it. He hadn’t even thought about a damn tattoo.
“That’s not Lieutenant Colonel Hughes,” Edward snarled. “And how dare you use his face!”
Heavy footsteps rushed forwards, approaching at a rapid pace. Edward was charging, ready to fight, but Roy seized up with one thought alone inside his head. That can’t happen.
Roy reached out frantically, and miraculously, his arms snaked around Edward’s torso. He gripped hard, as if all their lives depend on it - and maybe they did. Roy stopped the teenager from getting any closer. A part of him, the largest part, had his instincts screaming at him to protect Edward. Without his sight Roy couldn’t fully assess the risk Hughes’ posed, but Roy deemed him dangerous enough. His heart wanted to believe Hughes would never harm Ed or him, however his head won out. And Roy may not be the boy’s commanding officer anymore, but he would still protect Edward as best he could.
A smaller, more vulnerable part of him, that swelled within the cavity of his chest and was ruled by the pulse of his heart, told Roy not to let anyone harm Hughes. It was Hughes’ voice he’d heard. It was Hughes’ touch that had graced Roy’s skin, regardless of the hint of cruelty that had been there… Roy recognised it and he wouldn’t let anyone hurt Hughes. Not after he’d just been returned to Roy. Losing Hughes a second time was a weight that Roy wasn’t sure he could carry.
Edward fought, and fought hard, swearing and pushing with his efforts to escape Roy’s grasp, but Roy’s grip was ironclad. He wouldn’t let go. He wouldn’t let Hughes’ hurt Edward and in turn, he wouldn’t let Ed hurt Hughes.
“Brother, calm down -!” Al peeped, metallic and echoing in his armored suit.
The thunder of two gunshots sounded. Roy’s body tensed, expecting a blow, but none came. Quick steps moved towards him, causing Roy to grip onto Edward tighter. Whatever new threat had arrived, Roy would do his best to protect the boys.
“I’ll be back to see you soon, Roy.” The emphasis Hughes made on his name caused Roy to shudder, a steady set of tremors travelling down his spine. Not in anticipation, but in fear. It was foreboding. So unlike the Maes Hughes he once knew.
In the group’s startled moment, Hughes took advantage and darted off. Roy, unable to watch him disappear, listened to the sound of his shoes dissipate down the alley until there was no sound at all. His heart sunk to the pit of his gut. The floor collapsing beneath his feet.
The following silence was all encompassing as Edward stopped struggling. The fight had gone from him so Roy loosened his grip. Roy’s knees shook and he felt himself falling steadily to the ground. He landed with a thud, but there was no pain. Only disbelief as it caused his limbs to shake. His palms were sweating against the legs of his slacks while gripping his thighs in an attempt to quell his trembles.
“That… That was... Lieutenant Colonel Hughes…” Alphonse whispered from behind him.
The sound of heavy footsteps approached, but Roy barely registered it, too lost in his clouded haze of sorrow and shock.
“Is… Is that how you really lost your eyesight?” Edward asked. Then his tone turned hard and unforgiving. “Is it?” he growled.
Roy didn’t reply, didn't need to, his sins so very apparent. Even if Hughes never held him again, never kissed Roy’s lips or professed his love again, Roy’s motivations behind his transmutation were simple. Roy just wanted to see his friend - the one that held his heart always - smile at him again. However, because of his efforts, he'd never see again.
“What did you do?” Edward shouted, suddenly very close to Roy’s face, breath hot and angry.
It was ironic, Roy thought, that Edward should face him with such fury - a fury Roy felt deserving of - for if anyone could understand Roy’s drive to see a loved one again, it would be Edward. But perhaps it was that understanding that left young Edward so shaken.
“Edward.” The bark was short and sharp, a warning. Roy would recognise it anywhere. The new voice explained the sudden gunshots perfectly. In the heat of the moment, and with the fear of Hughes’ warning, Roy forgot that had happened.
Suddenly, gentle hands were on him, guiding him to stand.
“On your feet, Mustang,” Hawkeye commanded. Her tone was soft so it didn’t jarr him too roughly back to reality. “Here,” Hawkeye murmured. The familiar shape of his cane was pressed into Roy’s shaking hands. He gripped it tightly, the certainty of it a reassuring thing even as his fingers quivered around it.
“Th - Thank you, Hawkeye.”
"What was that, Sir?" He wasn't her superior anymore, but old habits die hard, Roy supposed.
"It was him."
"Who?" Riza urged. She was on edge. Roy heard it in the swiftness of her question.
Roy paled, finally admitting it for the first time to himself. The reality of what he’d done - what he created - was crushing. "Maes Hughes."
No one spoke. Silence fell as Roy tried to get his breathing under control. The only sound in the small alley was the desperate gasps of his inhales and frantic wheeze of his exhales.
“All right, Sir,” Hawkeye agreed quietly, and he was grateful for her continued kindness and support despite his faults. She was his best friend and Roy owed her, for so many things, for not refuting him, for allowing him, no matter how false, the image of Maes Hughes he clung to. She grasped his arm carefully, tugging him forward, encouraging him to walk. “Let’s get back to the car.”
Roy knew from the tone of her voice she didn’t quite believe him, but she didn't argue. Not yet, and Roy didn’t blame her. Hell, he wouldn’t have believed it either, if it weren’t for the press of Hughes’ eager lips against his own and the deep rumble of Hughes’ voice through his chest. They were familiar things, even if now they haunted him and stained him with fear and uncertainty. Roy wasn’t ready to let the frightening comfort of their familiarity go yet. They branded him - consumed him - and he allowed it. Even as his common sense returned and his heart rate slowed, he was struggling to accept everything.
Roy was glad Hawkeye was giving him this small solace. For now, anyway. Because as Maes Hughes had spoken - threatened - he’d be back again soon.
And Roy would be waiting.
#hyuroi#hyuroi fic#hyuroi fanfic#hyuroiofficial#collab fic#emma writes#i can hear the echoes of the past
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Can you write something about Romanogers' life after he rescued her? An outsiders take on their relationship. A new recruit gets intrigued with the couple one day when they were sparring. He couldn't believe that His Mentor, Steve, went to the ends of the Universe to save her. -xoxo
Hi! So sorry for the long wait, anon! It took me ages to write something that is decent and I’m not even sure it is. I really hope you’ll like it.
Just a quick note — to the other anon who dropped this beautiful GoT related prompt for Romanogers: I’m working on it!
Hot Gossip
Two yearshad passed since Thanos (Post-Thanos year2 as some called it). The world had slowly stood up on its feet again andgotten back on track. They wouldn’t go as far as saying that everything was backto normal — because it wasn’t. Five years had been lost. Some were stillaccommodating to the change, some pretended not to be held back by it, and somewould simply not wipe away what would forever be known as the darkest time inall of the Universe.
There wasone thing all agreed on, though. No one could ever forget what the Avengers —all of the extended Avengers community — had done to bring the dusted onesback. They had been elevated to a whole new level of heroism. And all feltgrateful for their incommensurable devotion and their sacrifice.
Despite theloss of the world’s first defender — Tony Stark — the Avengers remained. Grew.Until it became an institution.
AfterThanos, the world had understood they needed as many heroes as they could get.The facility became a training center for any person ready and willing to makea difference. It was an honor to be accepted and be taken under the wing of theoriginal Avengers: Captain America, Professor Hulk, Hawkeye, Scarlet Witch,War Machine, Falcon, James Barnes, Ant-Man, The Wasp, and Black Widow. BlackWidow who had miraculously returned after the Great Battle without anyexplanation was ever given.
Ethan,almost 19, was one of the privileged trainees who had gotten in.
First, tohis surprise, the training consisted of a lot of theoretical lessons — usuallyin the morning — then followed with physical preparation in the afternoon.
Ethan wasnot allowed to go on missions yet until the completion of his training in acouple of years’ time, but he counted the days to it. A calendar hung on thewall in the dormitory served as a daily reminder.
Unlike theother students in the facility, Ethan had been the very first to join the facility, making him the Avengers’ favorite (or so he liked to think).
He hadeverything to become someday an Avenger. He had the drive, the resilience, andthe courage. But he was also a little too enthusiastic. This was how he calledit. His mentors on the other hand.
Barnescalled it adventurous.
War Machine called it brazen.
ProfessorHulk called it bold.
CaptainAmerica called it reckless.
Falconcalled it stupid.
Black Widowcalled it cocky.
“You’re waytoo curious,” Hawkeye once called it during breakfast.
Ethanquickly swallowed down his toast.
“I was onlyasking,” he defended.
“Well youshouldn’t ask anything. Steve and Natasha’s private life is none of a student’sconcern.”
Ethansmiled triumphantly.
“So you doadmit they have a private life together?” he commented. Barton furrowed hisbrows. “Gotcha.”
“I have notconfirmed anything. All I’m saying is mind your business.”
Hawkeyegrabbed his empty mug and took it to the dishwasher. He then pointed hisforefinger at him. “I mean it, Ethan!”
Ethan noddedcoyly but smiled internally realizing his guts hadn’t lied to him. He knewthere was something going on between his two teachers.
It hadnothing to do with the fact that they spent all their time together, and evendelivered some classes together.
It hadnothing to do with the fact there was an organic closeness between them whichshowed in every interaction and non-interaction.
It wassomething deeper, something that went beyond obvious signs.
He oncewalked by the main gym and found them sparring. The eagerness to learn some newfighting techniques took over and he watched for a while.
Theysparred like two ballet dancers would move: at the same pace, and mirroringeach other’s motions. One always anticipated the other’s next move.
Despite the fact they were practicing combat skills, no anger, ruthlessness or evencompetition every transpired. On the contrary, quite a noticeable intimacy andgentleness which puzzled him.
Natasha puta stop to it as she reached for her shoulder and winced a little. Steve frownedwith concern and walked over to her. He pressed his palm on her painfulshoulder and stretched her arm softly.
“I’m okay,Steve. I guess I didn’t warm up enough, that’s all.”
“Or yousimply didn’t want to lose this one,” he answered with a smirk as he lifted herarm and stretched it in a different direction.
“Please,”she smiled. “You know I never lose.”
Steve letgo of her arm but his other hand remained on her shoulder.
“Maybe youshould have it checked out in the infirmary.”
Natashadove her eyes into his and simply smiled. It seemed it wasn’t the first timeshe had heard this.
“Sure,” shesaid.
Natashastepped out of the ring and made her way to the bathroom and Ethan couldn’thelp but notice that Steve’s eyes followed her until she went through the door,then lingered on a moment longer after she had disappeared before he finallylooked away and left the gym.
After this, Ethan couldn’t stop thinking about their interaction. He died to knowif there was a little fling between his two mentors. Curiosity was one thingof course, but part of him had made it an exciting challenge. If could indeedget confirmation that Capwidow was athing then that would be hot gossip to share with his friends.
He went toWilson next. Sam was undoubtedly the one he could get information from.
He jumpednext to him in the couch of the lounge.
“Do youknow you’re the coolest teacher?”
Wilsonprobed him. “Of course I know I am. And here’s some other flash news for you:I’m the strongest Avenger.”
“Strongerthan Thor,” Ethan asked.
“Thor isnow a Guardian of the galaxy. But even if he weren’t, he’d still come second.”
“Ok sosince we’re between cool guys here…,” the teenager swiftly changed topics. “I thought maybe youcould tell me what happened between Captain America and Black Widow.”
Sam laughed.
“You’reeven stupider than I think if you believe I’ll say something just because youcalled me cool.”
Ethanfeigned to pout. “Ah, shame. I mean Hawkeye trusted me enough to tell me they are an item.”
Sam gave hima reprobative look. “Nah. He wouldn’t tell you that.”
Ethansmiled. “He did. Just this morning.”
Sam put onhis best poker face.
“Why do youcare anyway?” he asked, confirming his theory in the process.
“I don’t. Ireally don’t,” he defended. “I was just wondering how it had happened. I mean, we’retalking about the Black Widow. How does one win her heart? Did Cap woo her — orcourt her, whichever it was called in the 40s.”
Wilsonsnorted. “First of all, you need to drop all those clichés…”
“About who?”Ethan asked, raising an eyebrow.
“About both.”
Ethanrolled his eyes. “So you’re telling me he just asked her on a date and that wasit?”
Sam had asad smile. “Not that easy, kid. What Cap did, it’s out of our league.”
“What’d hedo?” the boy asked eagerly.
“He savedher soul,” Wilson said.
Ethanfrowned. “Like figuratively speaking?”
“Literallyspeaking,” he answered. “You know Natasha sacrificed herself to get the SoulStone.”
He nodded.
Everybodyknew. That’s why she wasn’t present for the final battle against Thanos. Butshe had come back, although the circumstances around her return had never beenmade public. She had simply reappeared a few weeks later during a mission.
Sam cleared his throat and looked blankly at the wall. “Cap had one last mission after Thanos: bringall the Stones back. At least that was the official mission. He did itdifferently. He went to Vormir and came back with Nat.”
Ethanstared numbly. “How?”, he asked.
“Only them twoknow. But it was supposed to be irreversible.” Sam snorted lightly. “I guessnothing is when Cap decides so. He fought to have her soul back, and he won.”
For thefirst time, Ethan was speechless. What had started as a search for hot gossiphad turned out to be so much more. He couldn’t believe that his mentor, Steve, went tothe ends of the Universe to save her.
The puzzle became complete and as he saw the bigger picture, he began tounderstand many things about the two heroes and the way they acted around eachother.
They shared a secret that bound them in the most intimate way.
Ethan suddenly felt the need to protect it, too. That invaluable secrethe had been lucky to be told was too precious to be spread.
Captain America had stood square face to Thanos and his army with abroken shield.
But Steve Rogers had fought Death itself and come out victorious for thewoman he loved.
And his favorite Avenger grew even more worthy.
#romanogers#Natasha Romanoff#Black Widow#Steve Rogers#Captain America#stevenat#writing#ask answered#inneedofinspiration#hot gossip#capwidow#captasha
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