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angeltrapz · 2 years

Note

sorry if this has already been asked but do u have a fave saw character besides Adam and Lawrence?

I do actually!! I have a Lot but I know I. hardly talk abt others most of th time dkjfnakj (outside of Chainshipping Adam and Lawrence are genuinely some of my fave characters individually)

a big fave for me is Amanda! I relate to her in a lot of ways and also she just makes me so so sad,, I rlly wish she'd realized sooner than III that John didn't actually care abt her & was just using her to further his agenda. she has so much potential and I believe she deserved to have her character explored more + also I just want her to be happy wtf!!! I've spoken abt this w my bestie Adam but like imagine if she (and Hoffman & Lawrence) was the one to take John Kramer out. like they have had Enough and just fucking get his ass. I simply think it's what she deserves <33 and also like smth else I think abt a lot too is the fact that even though she got clean after going thru the RBT/becoming an apprentice, she ended up self-harming (we don’t know if she’d been doing that Prior to her test) and in reality that is just trading one harmful addiction for another and I hate that John used that loyalty to allow that. he ENCOURAGED her to do that bc it meant that she’d rely on him for guidance, bc it’d keep her dependant on him and thus would ensure that he’d always have her assistance. I hate that man so much Mandy deserved better!!!

I have also been fond of Strahm since I first saw him in IV lmao. part of that is he is Tall and Pretty and I am Gay but also bc? his character ALSO deserved to have been explored more!! he's also someone who had so so much potential and I wish his narrative had been more like. fulfilling? if tht makes sense. I'm particularly fond of the idea (which is actually mostly canon) that after what happens to Perez, he ends up acting as a sort of vigilante Jigsaw hunter. IDK I just adore that idea (also I wanted him to at least know Perez was okay b4 he died. I have no idea if he did but it breaks my heart to think he died not knowing she was alive, even if she was killed off in V - which by the way was ANOTHER shitty decision).

GIBSON!! I love him he's such a fucking dork. that scene where he's like "it's a safe house, Jill. safe. house." and IMMEDIATELY AFTER palmer comes in like "hoffman knows where we are" is SO fucking funny, esp the look on his face. I can't help it I'm sure that scene wasn't supposed to be funny but it was. but anyway! I think part of why I'm drawn to him is bc he has a very strong moral compass (like Strahm, though perhaps in a different way) and I do genuinely think he wants to help ppl and keep them safe, and I think he's also willing to bend the rules if it'll help ppl. I know he's in one movie and he Dies In It but IDK... funny little guy. I care him.

I've spoken abt it a little bit but I've adored Laura since I first watched II. it just kinda struck me how she's so kind and she's so scared and she didn't deserve to die the way she did. she didn't even deserve to be in the HOUSE (along w pretty much everyone in that trap,, I have conflicting feelings abt Xavier though) and the fact that she was literally abducted from her own car in the middle of the night. I don't know she just strikes me as someone who has such a big heart and wants to be able to trust ppl and then she gets forced into hell. Laura baby you deserved better and I wish you'd survived <//3

Both Daniel Matthews and Daniel Rigg!! I genuinely love Rigg so much and it pisses me off beyond belief that his flaw according to Jigsaw was... caring abt ppl?? like yes I do agree tht Rigg was absolutely overworking himself + needed to give himself a break and that his focus on the case was unhealthy but Eric was a close friend of his and like... he felt guilty that he let Eric leave. he just wanted to find his friend. I totally understand why he went through the door, knowing that Eric was on the other side even if he didn't know what'd happen when he did go through. he breaks my heart dude!! he deserved better too.

and Daniel!!! Daniel is such a sweetheart, esp the way he interacts with everyone, the way he covers up Gus's head to allow him some dignity, the way he keeps close to Laura once he notices her getting weaker and tries to encourage her to keep going,, he's just this sweet kid who's acting out due to problems at home when at his core, he just wishes his family wasn't so splintered. I'm also heartbroken abt the fact that like. he saw most of his fellow captives die and then Had To Kill One Himself. and then when he gets out? one of the only ppl he trusted turned out to have been responsible for putting him there AND his dad is missing after doing everything in his power to make sure Daniel was gnna be okay. he makes me so fucking sad dude.

so I'm gnna gather these next ones together but Eric, Mallick, Art, and William (Easton). I've spoken abt Eric and William here a little bit b4 and I do want to clarify tht I do not condone/excuse their actions bc I have gotten. shitty asks in th past abt them frm ppl who seem to think I just excuse their actions bc I like them?? which is So not the case lmao

but! moving on. as I'm a lot more nervous to talk abt him than I used to be, I haven't discussed Eric for a while but rest assured I am thinking abt him always. again my bestie adam creates SO much good content for him and is like one of th only ppl I feel comfortable talking abt him with so like! a lot of my thoughts center around the AU where Eric survives the ice block trap and learns to cope w his life after. the reason I included these four together is bc they're very intertwined in the SAW polycule (which was also created by Adam <33)! it also like... breaks my heart to think tht like. Eric spends the entirety of SAW II thinking his child is in immediate danger and he can't do anything to help him. his entire motive is finding his son. has he been kind of a shitty father so far? yes, honestly. but no one cld ever say he doesn't love Daniel. it also destroys me to think abt how in canon, Eric probably didn't even know Daniel was okay!!! like that level of horror is too much for me man!!

Mallick is honestly so. I don't even know how to explain it. I relate to him a lot as well bc we have very similar tics + th way we experience things? like he spends so much time trying to make himself smaller, even if he's brash and somewhat abrasive in the way he talks to the rest of the Fatal Five. he'd known Brit for all of an hour maybe and was willing to sacrifice himself for her if it meant she'd get out. he harbours so much guilt abt the fire he set and what it did to innocent ppl, which was not his intention but a result of his (and Brit’s) actions nonetheless. I rlly do think he'd been torturing himself internally abt tht + thus sees the fact he'd ended up in a Jigsaw game ("I knew this was going to happen to me") as a sort of karmic punishment, due retribution he didn't receive as he was never arrested in connection to the fire. I don't know there's so much abt Mallick that makes me sad and honestly I just want him to be happy too. if you want fantastic Mallick meta (and amazing meta in general) then I have to suggest @ericmatthewz + his meta takes (who has so far been mentioned in this post as my bestie Adam kjfhakj ily <33)

Art!!! I am so fond of him. was he an apprentice? was he an unlucky bastard who happened to have been tested twice (which is interesting, considering Eric is the only other person that’s happened to)? we don’t know! and that’s the interesting part. if he WAS an apprentice, I like to think tht he wasn’t an active participant in John’s nonsense - his job was to set up Rigg’s tests and keep watch over Eric + Hoffman and nothing more. I definitely don’t think he agreed w what John was doing, and I also think he had a lot of like. compassion for Eric. ‘cause he didn’t have to stabilize him after he tried to jump off the ice, he didn’t have to interact w him at ALL, but he did those things anyway. he saved him anyway. that stuck w me for some reason. if he WASN’T an apprentice, I rlly do think it’s just another show of John’s hypocrisy (”It can’t be personal” okay old man so what the fuck is w Lawrence and Art and William and even Amanda as a patient at Jill’s clinic?? huh??) and an exercise of power. Art was doing his fucking job. Are Rex and Ivan terrible ppl? absolutely and I don’t feel bad for them whatsoever! but the nature of Art’s occupation is tht sometimes, you don’t get to choose. sometimes you have to play devil’s advocate bc That’s Your Job. I’m not saying all lawyers are innocent here but like... it’s His Job, you know? just. jhfkjsa. same reason I hate how John treated Lawrence.

WILLIAM. okay. I totally get where ppl are coming from when it comes to like... discussions of his job and the problems that lie within rejecting coverage of medical needs, esp bc healthcare is a shitshow in th US and often doesn’t help the ppl that need it most, but. I find John’s treatment of William very... invasive? implanting the key in his side, hooking those explosive bracelets/anklets into his skin, tattooing him permanently under those devices - that’s all incredibly invasive and intentional. like John doesn’t want William to forget how he thinks of him. And the fact that none of his trials were recorded in the sense that Tara & Brett (both of whom I can totally understand why they wouldn’t like William, from their perspectives) or Pamela cld see what he sacrificed for his team. that is also smth I believe was intentional.

we’re shown countless times that William tries to do whatever he can to make sure ppl make it out, but John’s constructions of his tests mean that he just Can’t which! again! is intentional!!!! and that fucks me up!!! I rlly do believe at his core William is a man who believes he’s doing the right thing (even if the system is Incredibly flawed) and what he wanted at the end of the day was to keep ppl alive and safe and the fact tht he cldn’t is smth that weighs heavily on him and I dunno. I just think abt tht a lot. (I am so sorry for this huge paragraph)

last three are Jill, Diana, and Corbett <33 Jill I just think is neat + I often think abt how all she wanted to do was help ppl, how she probably made a genuine connection with Amanda and cared so deeply for her that she still checked up on her when she could, and the fact that her desire to help others inadvertently caused the greatest tragedy she’d ever experienced thus far, though it wasn’t her fault whatsoever. I often think abt how she’d had to grieve alone (”I lost him too”) and how hard that must’ve been - and then John was revealed to be the Jigsaw killer, and I Know that had to have been Such a blow. I care abt Jill and I rlly don’t like th way her story ended. she’s such a strong character and it very much feels like a cop out to have her killed off in the way she was! after everything she’d been thru!! to have someone so caring with such a big heart endure such hardship only to kill her off when she’s on the cusp of like. beginning to heal and maybe put John behind her was a Bad decision tbh. + also this is also a brief opportunity to say that I’ve considered Jill/Kerry b4 and like in an AU where they both survive? badass vigilante gfs who will singlehandedly end Jigsaw if they have to (and who cld team up w Perez & Strahm too :3c).

Diana and Corbett!! my girls!! all I have to say abt them is that I’m very attached to them bc they’re just kids. they are literally not even in double digits when going thru Jigsaw’s bullshit and I Hate that (I hate tht Daniel + Brett were involved just as much!!). I do find it interesting that as a villain, Jigsaw has no qualms abt endangering children when typically that’s a hard limit for most villains, but I fucking hate it at th same time bc again. they are KIDS (goes to show how fucked up John’s doctrine is too djfkasdks). I like to hc them as being close friends both as children and throughout their lives + are good + supportive for one another <33

anyway. ty for asking + I am. SO sorry tht I went off so much dkjhfkadsjk

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bts-ficrecs · 4 years

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Any jungkook angst with no smut? Thank you!

yes hello. ‘tis me. Finally responding to you after 31498237 months.

i rarely read full on ANGST because my weak heart cannot take it, ok. So i don’t have a lot to share and most of the fics i read are pretty short. i don’t think any of what i read are series bc omg can u imagine a full on series with NO HAPPINESS!! I WOULD D WORD!!!!!!!1 sjadflakwe but i’ve included some angsty series in the 2nd half of this compilation!

as requested, no smut. i’m sorry if i missed something and it does have smut 🙏 also this ask made me realize how many angsty fics DO have smut involved, lololol we’re all a bunch of emo hornies and tbh,,, i’m not even gonna deny that 😂 ok ok i’ll stop rambling now.

* m/n: mai notes can also be read as “my notes”. ha ha ha wow i’m so punny.

HAVE READ:

⊱ ┄ A Fallen Bookmark on A Thursday Afternoon by @cutaepatootie

summary: He came to you like the air comes into the train station after the fast arriving of the machine. It comes fast and unexpected, making you hoist your head to look at the long vehicle and the people inside. It is so fast you can’t even distinguish the different wagons. As the train comes to a stop, the wind that it creates plays with your hair, leaving you breathless. That’s how Jeon Jungkook came into your life.

⊱ ┄ A Mark of Betrayal by @jimlingss

summary: Forgotten as the eighth deadly sin; each time one betrays, a mark will be signed on their skin…

⊱ ┄ A Piece of the Moonlight by @jimlingss

summary: For your loved ones, the people who are waiting at home, the people who have died - you will fight. And sometimes to fight means to sacrifice: who you really are and the person you really love.

⊱ ┄ Blue Orchids by @inktae

summary: You were eighteen years old when Jimin’s name showed up on your hand.

m/n: this is like… one of THE og bts fics and i will always promote it bc IT DESERVES TO BE READ BY EVERYONE

⊱ ┄ Delirium by @sseudanym

summary: What to feel, when it’s all gone.

⊱ ┄ Give Me Your Hands (I Will Pick the Stars for You) by mindheist (AO3)

summary: I miss you like the moon misses the sun, destined to chase you until the end of time.

m/n: this is the only mxm fic here. it’s jungkook x taehyung :) i hope it won’t deter you from reading it though! it’s an absolutely beautiful story.

⊱ ┄ In My Head by obiwrites (AO3)

summary: The one where you and your long time boyfriend aren’t on the same page

⊱ ┄ It’s Enough by @dark-muse-iris

summary: Preparing dinner reminds you of all the struggles you’ve experienced in your marriage. Your husband Jungkook, ever your anchor, tries to cheer you up with gentle words.

⊱ ┄ Mamihlapinatapai by @tayegi

summary: Mamihlapinatapai (noun): a look shared by two people, each wishing that the other would initiate something that they both desire but which neither wants to begin.

⊱ ┄ My Beauty, My Blood by @7cypher

summary: With Namjoon out of the picture, Jeongguk has to step up and be the sole successor to the organization laid out before him. However, guilt doesn’t escape him very easily, and neither does your persistence.

⊱ ┄ Resentment by obiwrites (AO3)

summary: It was an ugly kind of sad. The kind that kept you up at night, that weighed heavy in your chest and made you feel like you couldn’t breathe, it made you feel like molasses—made your limbs drag and your body ache. You’d heard of the physical effects of depression—but you weren’t expecting this.

⊱ ┄ The Train of Lost Souls by @inktae

summary: The moment you step inside the train, you are given two options. You can choose to live or you can choose to move on. You are dead, but it’s up to you to do something about it. The choice is solely yours.

m/n: ok so this is technically a Hoseok fic since the reader is interacting with Hoseok, but Jungkook is a part of this fic and IT HURTS ME SO MUCH SO I HAD TO INCLUDE THIS OK

⊱ ┄ The Swirling Ways of Stars by @inktae

summary: Jeon Jungkook doesn’t feel like home.

⊱ ┄ Untitled by @floralseokjin

summary: He noticed you almost instantly. Like the wind blowing autumn leaves past his heels, he felt you near him. His body an instant constant buzzing as he stood inside the kitchen, back against the counter where he watched you outside. The separation of the living area and the balcony window feeling miles away regardless of how close he was to you…how close you were to him…

⊱ ┄ We Were by @gukyi

summary: Not all once upon a time’s have happily ever after’s.

⊱ ┄ Water Ripples by @inktae

summary: It may be a mistake caused by unreachable forces, but it is not a curse, like some may think. Meeting each other, being able to touch each other but being forbidden to stay close beyond the limits of the sea could be considered torture — where is the pleasure in getting a taste of something you cannot have, an ephemeral spark in the night? in getting wings that can’t make you soar, no matter how many times they flutter?

m/n: i made the mistake of rereading this when i was compiling this list and yes i am crying again. hooo booyyy.

HAVE NOT READ YET:

⊱ ┄ Below Thunder Showers by @inktae

summary: Min Yoongi leads Earth with a stern hand and a pair of cold eyes. You lead a withered space station that’s been losing hope for years, mind tired and heart torn. Jeon Jungkook is no more than a broken soldier who’s slowly losing his humanity, but his longing for the rain keeps him tied to the ground. Three paths converge again when the two worlds clash, and as precarious as they were, it does not stop you from falling in love for a second time.

⊱ ┄ Blossom by @dimpled-gukkie

summary: “Blossom, blossom, blossom. As unexperienced as I may be in the field you really didn’t think I’d only bring one weapon did you? It’s no wonder your gang has gone to shit ever since your dad died, it’s clear that you’re incompetent as well as incapable of being a good leader.” He laughs, raising the gun to point at you. You raise your own and he just smiles again before setting his weapon down. “You know what, how about we do this the old fashion way? I heard guns weren’t your specialty anyways.” Shrugging off his coat you spot the long dagger tucked into his waistband. “Cmon sweetheart, show me just how dangerous you are.”

⊱ ┄ Contradict by @drowsymochi

summary: Jungkook is a name you hear often around the crowded city of Seoul, South Korea. Jungkook is the leader of Bangtan, a gang that has acquired a worldwide audience. The gang is stationed in Seoul, creating a feeling of uneasiness on the streets. Everyone in the city has been acquainted with one of the members at some time, being that they’re always around. For the most part, they don’t harm innocent civilians unless they commit a crime that the members find worthy of punishment. That penalty can range from bankruptcy, to torture and eventually death, which makes the city wary of their words and surroundings. If only you had been as terrified as everyone else.

⊱ ┄ Downfall by @donewithjeon

summary: Your hesitation cost you dearly, and you swore never to let it happen again.

⊱ ┄ Drown For You by @callistojjk

summary: There was something in that enormous tank, hidden in the murky water. All you knew was that you weren’t allowed inside the room and that it used to hold something dangerous.

⊱ ┄ Drag Me Down to Hell by @kimvtae

summary: There’s a darkness to your city, a murderous underbelly filled with crime and deceit that you’ve sworn to avoid at all costs. But the universe has funny ways of forcing your involvement in the form of a notorious mob boss and his young daughter.

⊱ ┄ Expensive Mistakes by @honeyedhoseok

summary: Your night spent swindling at the pool table goes left when your lackluster skills are found to be false, so it’s a good thing Jungkook has some supernatural abilities to keep D and his friends from recollecting their money–but his help comes at a price.

⊱ ┄ Fierce And Delicate by @mintseesaw

summary: Jungkook and y/n had been brought in two different worlds. Jungkook living an unfortunate life and y/n being controlled by her parents all her life. Despite the imperfect relationship, they completed each other like a puzzle there is. Jungkook has one promise he intends to keep: to always make you happy. In the process of fulfilling your wish he had once declined you of, he kept a secret from you. And unintentionally, he has done more damages than expected…Every action, and every decision… could be blamed by the flawed past.

⊱ ┄ Fallout Technical Report by @pantaemonium

summary: You knew you should not go into the darkness of night, even if your hope had run thin. The monsters were free to walk the earth, and some of them were still as human as you.

⊱ ┄ Fear in Your Eyes by @gukyi

summary: There’s a werewolf in that forest behind your house, they told you, and he’ll eat you before you can even beg for mercy.

⊱ ┄ First Light by @inktae

summary: “Have you ever felt like the world is too loud sometimes?” “No. For me it’s always quiet.”

⊱ ┄ Finding Beauty in Your Darkest Places by @jungtaeyoongles

summary: Everyone has their issues, and everyone deals with them differently. Jungkook thinks that avoiding his problems is the best option out there. AKA Jeon Jungkook is the newest patient at the Omelas Specialized Psychiatric Clinic, and he just wants to get in and out as quickly as possible so that he can go back to university and be with his friends again. Of course, that doesn’t work out according to his plan.

⊱ ┄ Gravity by @donewithjeon

summary: The universe works in mysterious ways. What you didn’t know was that the world would give you the best at such a young age.

⊱ ┄ I Got You On My Mind by @bangtanbombimagines

summary: In a world where soulmates can share thoughts, you never imagined that the sweet voice in your head would belong to a guy like Jungkook.

⊱ ┄ Lost Boy by @hoshikimatata

summary: You are the only girl Jungkook keeps coming back to, and you thought that made you the one to save him. But in the end, he’s the only one who can save himself.

⊱ ┄ Let Me Stay Close To You by @9uk

summary: You were finally free from the worst nightmare of your life in high school. The doors of college welcomed you with open arms, you were set on living your best life in here, away from the toxicity back at home. That shimmer of hope in restoring your life, was somehow effortlessly crushed by a tap on your shoulder. “Hey Y/N, why don’t you say we catch up for a moment?”

⊱ ┄ Left Behind by @bbfairy

summary: Every person is required to go through a series of tests to see if they’re smart enough to be a part of the upper, elite district. You and Jungkook are childhood friends. Jungkook’s dream is to live with you in the elite class, but deep down, you’ve always known that you’ll fail the exams. For ten years, you wrote letters to give him on the day of his expected departure.

⊱ ┄ Lie to Me by @hugseoks

summary: It had seemed so easy for you to move on, did you even care at all?

⊱ ┄ Pull Me Down by @starryeyedgukk

summary: “Do you regret it?” “What?” “Falling in love with me? It feels like I only weigh you down.” “I’ll let you pull me down to the depths of hell if that’s what it means to love you.”

⊱ ┄ Rooftop by @thelillzmonster

summary: An unrequited love burdens your fragile heart. And when an unfamiliar, isolated boy is thrown into the mix, you’re not sure whether it all turns for the better or worse.

⊱ ┄ The Burning Flame by @bangtanfanfiction

summary: You’re sent as a scout from the Academy into enemy territory, tasked with the mission to make sure their king doesn’t unleash another war on the four nations. During your quest, you get tangled up with a lone rider, as stubborn and hard as the scales of his dragon.

⊱ ┄ The Black Veil by @jungcock

summary: You never wanted to be a vampire, yet you had been 21 years old for the last 2 centuries. You never wanted a relationship either, yet you incidentally make a very human Jeon Jungkook fall in love with you, twice.

⊱ ┄ Waste It On Me by @byeoltoyuki

summary: Being a journalist, you were familiar with the concept of taking risks and pushing your limits to get the best story. But when a gangster by the name of Jungkook tries to involve himself in your quiet, safe personal life, you are forced to reconsider the limits of your comfort zone, your boundaries, your morals and even your feelings.

⊱ ┄ Why I Hate You by @floofyeol

summary: Jeon Jungkook’s only regret, is knowing her in the first place.

⊱ ┄ Watchdog by @kpopisthereasonihavenolife

summary: Being kidnapped, then ‘accidentally’ eavesdropping on a lot of Intel that was specifically not for outside ears, was definitely not your way of being ‘recruited’ into the mafia world. Much less end up with a companion who didn’t seem very fond of you, but stuck guarding and watching you. A Watchdog sort of man he was, and almost entirely too suffocating.

⊱ ┄ Written on the Sky by @inktae

summary: Time is, without a doubt, merciless.

⊱ ┄ What Happened by @bangtanfanfiction

summary: You and Jungkook’s relationship was on the tip of the edge. Is there any possibility to get it back up?

#so basically just read all of inktae's fics lol #bts fic recs #jungkook angst #bts scenarios #jungkook fanfic #yes i wrote 'smutties'#fite me #g recs #anon #f:jjk

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avis-writeshq · 4 years

Text

Akaashi Keiji x Reader - 青いバラ (Blue Rose)

Pairing: Akaashi Keiji x Fem!Reader

Summary: Blue rose - a flower of the genus Rosa that presents blue-to-violet pigmentation instead of the common red, white, or yellow. Blue roses are often used to symbolise secret or unattainable love.

Warnings: VAST MENTIONS OF DEATH, mentions of blood, slow burn, ANGST, fluff if you look carefully, and 9k words of me procrastinating and trying very hard to keep the fic alive. ALSO HANAHAKI DISEASE AU BC I’M ADDICTED :D

Other: Yo, sorry for dying on you giuys for like, a while. School started up again this week but it was online and I was procrastinating on legit eVerYtHiNg oop so, anyway, hugs and kisses, hope you enjoy this fic because I am so freaking in love with Akaashi it isn’t funny anymore.

Ngl, this fic took like 2+ weeks to complete, and my editor can attest to that :’) Hope you guys enjoy and don’t let this flop. Your requests are coming out soon so thank you for your support! Also I need a nice anon fam to keep nmme happy and occupied during quarantine :)

Word count: 9.1k

Editor: @creative-hours-open

Things you probably wanna know, for all you ‘x reader’ illiterates:

(Y/N): Your Name

(H/C): Hair Colour / Color

(E/C): Eye Colour / Color

(N/N): Nickname

***

You don’t remember when these feelings came to be. You don’t remember when you first felt your heart skip a beat whenever he walked past you. You don’t remember the first time you started replaying all your conversations with him in your head when it was 3 am and your brain wouldn’t shut up. You don’t remember the first time you blushed when he sent you a soft smile after you stared for a second too long. No, you don’t remember those things; but you do remember the first time a small blue rose petal appeared in your hand after you coughed too hard.

Hanahaki Disease: Hanahaki Disease (花吐き病 ) is a disease where the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. It can be cured through surgical removal, but when the infection is removed, the victim's romantic feelings for their love also disappear.

For months you lived with this disease not even your parents knew. How could they? After all, they were each other’s first love – their love wasn’t one-sided and besides, you didn’t want to worry them; you can get through this yourself.

Right?

You leaned over the bucket, velvet-soft petals tickling your throat before pouring into the overflowing bucket. Tears prickled the sides of your eyes, threatening to spill just like the petals that scattered to the ground.

God, does this ever stop? You coughed again, gasping for air as you sat on your knees on the cold tile floor. Shit, what time was it? You have school today! Coughing one last petal out, you emptied the bucket into a plastic bag and threw it to the side, grabbing your school bag and rushing out the house.

You couldn’t be late… the bus leaves and waits for nobody. You ran as fast as you could to the bus stop, stopping only to get oxygen back into your system. You still had the wind knocked out of you from spewing rose petals all over the bathroom, but you made it just in time.

The bus was basically full with the only seat that was empty being…

Shit.

You genuinely thought of flinging yourself out of the bus or just standing, but that wasn’t an option.

“Hey, sit down, will ya? I can’t move if you don’t,” the bus driver grunted as you flinched.

“S-sorry, sir…” you mumbled, holding your breath when you sat in the only seat available.

Clutching the bag in your lap tightly, you tried your best to ignore the awkward presence next to you. You went to the same school as him! You shouldn’t be feeling this uneasy…

“Ah, (L/N) (Y/N), right?”

Fuck.

You raise your eyes to meet his eyes. “Yes…? You’re Akaashi Keiji.”

He nodded, giving you a once over before finally saying, “Did you go to the flower shop beforehand?”

“No…?”

“You have a flower on your shirt,” he explained. “Well, a petal.”

Your eyes widened and you looked down at the collar of your shirt. Lo and behold, a bright blue petal was tucked away, but you can see most of it poking out. You felt your cheeks flush in embarrassment.

“Oh… ha ha… thank you?”

He nodded. “It’s fine…” He was quiet for a moment before murmuring, “blue looks good on you.”

***

Why did he have to be in the same class as you? Every single time he was near you, the flower in your lungs thought that it would be a wonderful time to bloom. Right after the bus stop, for example, you coughed your lungs out into a janitor’s basket before forcing your way to class.

Biology, the first class of the day and he was a foot away from you. Did the gods have something against you? Twenty minutes into the class, you felt yourself on the verge of another coughing fit.

You raised your hand meekly, and the teacher looked at you, an eyebrow raised in mockery. Your other hand was covering your mouth as you forced the bright blue rose petals down but you couldn’t. You let out a cough, a few petals falling into your hand. Begrudgingly, the teacher lets you go to the bathroom, and you run out the door frantically.

‘How pathetic,’ you thought to yourself as you coughed out more petals. The roots were getting deeper, you can tell. You cough harshly once more, and a small rose bud falls onto the tiled bathroom floors. ‘Get over yourself. He won’t look at you twice.’

But you knew that. You knew that more than the next person. So why… Why couldn’t you get over him? Each cough hurt more than the last, and the toilet was full of small blue petals. Some had small splotches of blood on them, and you could smell the metallic scent of the blood overtaking the soft scent of roses and tears. You wiped your tears with the cuffs of your school blazer. No more, you willed yourself, stepping out of the cubicle.

Splashing cold water on your face, you let out a breath as you stared at yourself in the mirror. When did you stoop so low? Your eyes were blotched with tears and your cheeks were hollow from not eating. This was just too much. You clenched your eyes closed, tears rolling onto your cheeks as you did. You shook your head; time to get back to class.

***

“Hey, are you okay?” Aneko asked gently as you nibbled on your lunch.

You mustered a smile to please her. “I’m okay.”

“You had a coughing fit this morning; I don’t think you’re okay.” She gave you a disapproving look and you couldn’t help but flinch under her scrutinising gaze.

“It’s just a cough. It’ll pass.”

You can tell she doesn’t believe you, but your silence finishes off the conversation. Well, it should, anyway.

“(L/N)-san, are you feeling alright?” A voice asks from above you, and you felt your heart drop.

“Akaashi-san. Yes, I’m okay, thank you.” You don’t look at him, eyes drawn to the bento in front of you as you fought the soft blush on your cheeks.

“If you keep coughing, the nurse should be able to give you some medicine,” he says gently, his eyes looking at you from above.

Your eyes flickered to his for a second. “I don’t think there’s a medicine that can help me.”

He opened his mouth to respond but is pulled away by a loud and boisterous third year. “AKAASHIII!!!”

“They need you,” you said, closing your bento. “I have to go. Let’s go, Aneko. Thank you for your concern, but I really should get going.”

“But-”

“AKAASHIII!”

He sent you one last look before running after his friend. You just stayed silent, clenching your fists in your lap as Aneko shot you a confused look.

“I didn’t know you were friends with Akaashi,” she remarked, frowning at you. “What happened?”

“Aneko,” you murmured, tears prickling your eyes, “do you know of the Hanahaki disease?”

Her eyes widened. “Don’t tell me…”

You just sent her a wry smile before running to the bathroom.

***

Another disastrous day. The bus was relatively empty on the way home, probably because some of the boys had afterschool volleyball training. Pulling your phone out of your blazer pocket, you opened up Google.

‘Is there a way to get rid of the Hanahaki Disease?’

Multiple sites came up; some were even websites of hospitals that claimed to get rid of the disease.

You pressed on a tab that seemed to answer your question.

‘Surgery can help, but I had a friend who was unable to feel affection after the surgery.’

‘You should confess first!’

‘The medical bills are really expensive, but it’s worth it.’

‘Would you rather suffocate from flower petals or lose the ability to love? My sister did it and she regrets it all.’

‘There’s a guy who does it in India for cheap.’

‘The cheapest is 150,000 yen. Good luck.’

You groaned, closing the tab and leaned back in your chair. Could this day get any worse? How were you supposed to get 150,000 yen, anyway? Even if you could afford the surgery, there was no way your parents would even allow you to take it. Hugging your bag closer to your chest, you let out a sigh. The only way to get rid of these emotions was to either have the person love you back, get over him, or surgery. There was, of course, the prospect of drowning yourself in bleach, but you didn’t think that your friends and family would agree to such ‘extreme’ methods.

‘Dammit, Akaashi, you’re giving me problems when I need it the least,’ you thought to yourself, as you stepped out of the bus. How long does it take for this disease to kill you, anyway?

The answer was six months. According to your research, you have had the Hanahaki Disease for a minimum of four months, so you were basically on the verge of death. In other words, you had 2 months to either take the surgery, get him to fall in love with you, or die. The options didn’t seem too promising.

Your parents weren’t home today, as usual. A note was waiting for you on the kitchen bench and you suppressed a sigh.

‘Dinner is in the microwave. Don’t skip your dinner.

~ Love, Dad’

You skipped dinner anyway.

***

School counsellors were really… different. They’re not teachers, but they teach you valuable ‘life lessons’ when you really need it. They’re not nurses but they take care of you when you’re hurt. Well, they take care of you when you’re hurt mentally.

According to a lot of other students, the counsellor at Fukurodani could either be your best friend or sworn enemy. But at this point, you were desperate. You really needed advice and you couldn’t just ask your friends. No, that wouldn’t work out. After all, they were as insane as you.

“Tell me whatever you need to tell me,” she said with a gentle smile as you looked around the room that enclosed you.

The room was really… childish? Ladybug wall stickers decorated the walls topped with a huge cat poster plastered by the door. And still you questioned yourself, God, what were you supposed to say?

You had it rehearsed in your mind, ‘I have the Hanahaki Disease,’ but when it was your turn to talk, your tongue was glued to the roof of your mouth.

The woman across from you, bless her, just sat there with a patient nod. She handed you a pen and paper.

“Can you write it for me?” She asks as she puts her glasses on.

You did as you were told.

You watched as she read over your scrawl and her jaw dropped. It just… dropped. You’re not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, but her jaw dropped as she gaped at you, glasses askew.

“The Hanahaki Disease… are you sure?”

You raised an eyebrow as if to ask, ‘I have rose petals coming out of my mouth and you think I’m not sure?’

She sighed, leaning back in her chair. “You know, that is very dangerous. Have you consulted a doctor? Have you told your parents?”

“I don’t want to worry anyone,” you mumbled, “my parents aren’t home a lot so they wouldn’t have time to take me to the doctors, and the surgery is pretty-”

“You’re considering the surgery?” She cut you off, mouth open and surprised but there was more to that; she was… concerned.

You grimaced. “What else can I do?”

She raised an unamused eyebrow but a ghost of a smile spread on her face. “You can try telling him?”

The thought alone made you feel sick. “I don’t think I can. He obviously doesn’t like me that way.”

“Have you tried talking to him?” She prompted, taking out a notepad to write in before nodding at you to continue.

“We only had one decent conversation and that was about English homework. We’ve only talked once outside of school and…” you fell silent, averting your gaze. “Why would he like me, anyway? He has volleyball to put up with, and his grades are perfect. He doesn’t need a love interest entering his life.”

The counsellor sighed, looking you dead in the eye. “The most important thing for a relationship to bloom is communication. If you can’t hold a conversation now, how is that supposed to help you in the future?”

You hated it when important people had a point. “It gets worse when I’m near him.”

“Just imagine you’re talking to a friend,” she said kindly, before proceeding to ask more questions.

***

You stepped into the class halfway through your fourth period. All heads turn to you as you lowered your head in embarrassment. Meekly passing the teacher a late slip, you took your seat behind Akaashi Keiji.

You couldn’t bring yourself to say anything when class ended and everyone packed up to get ready for their next class. However, the first move had already been made.

“Akaashi was asking about you,” Aneko said as you grabbed more books out of your locker.

Your eyes widened, flickering to hers for a split second. “What did he say?”

“He wanted to know if you were alright. I was getting worried too, y’know; you were in the counsellor’s office for a lot longer than I expected.”

“She wouldn’t stop talking,” you said in a half-hearted explanation. You didn’t want to go into the details.

“(L/N)-san, you went to the counsellor’s office?”

You wanted to shrivel up and die. You didn’t prepare for this! What were you supposed to say now?

Letting out a small breath, you turned around to face him. “Yeah, but I’m okay.”

“Is your cough getting any better?” He asked gently, peering down at you with concern.

“Yeah, I’m getting better,” you lied, praying for the little flower growing in your lungs to disappear in this short moment.

He nodded, “I’m glad. Ah, and I photocopied my notes from the previous classes. They should cover the lessons.”

You swallowed thickly, fighting the heat that clouded your cheeks.

You stuttered out a timid response. “Thank you…”

He sent you a small smile before taking his seat. You felt sick all over again and coughed out some more petals. Aneko’s eyes watched you with concern as you faked a smile.

“I’m okay. I don’t need to go to the bathroom for this,” you said, hoping to calm her nerves.

“I’m taking you to the doctor’s after this, got it? Screw your parents, you need some medical advice,” she deadpanned, her tangerine eyes staring into yours and you can’t help the sigh that escaped your lips.

“We’ll talk more after class,” you promised before sitting down and going over the notes Akaashi made for you. Your heart hammered in your chest as you read his kanji. Unsurprisingly, it was neat. But then again, what were you expecting from Akaashi Keiji? He seemed to be the type to take everything quite seriously.

Ten minutes pass. Then twenty… thirty minutes later and you wonder to yourself, I didn’t cough once?

***

“How long did you say you had this disease for?” The doctor asked.

“According to Google, around four months,” you answer, fiddling with your fingers.

“Any particular reason you didn’t come with your parents?”

“They had work.”

Aneko hummed to confirm your statement. “She’s alone for most of the time. That’s why I am here to help!”

“Right…” the doctor eyed her before turning back to you. “Have you talked to him?”

“Why do people keep asking me that?” You mutter to yourself, digging your nails into the palms of your hands.

The doctor let out an exasperated sigh. “Unless you can earn yourself an ungodly amount of money, the only thing you can do is hope to earn his affections. That or the flowers in your lungs will kill you.”

You knew that. The words seemed to fall on deaf ears because, hell, you knew that better than anyone in the room. Were you the only one with this disease? Everyone you talked to, everyone you confided in… they never seemed to have this disease. Your parents were in love with each other as soon as they met. The school counsellor has never been in love with anyone before. Aneko and her boyfriend have known each other since they were kids and fell in love relatively quickly while this doctor makes the Hanahaki Disease sound so simple. As if it was nothing more than just a small phase or bump in one’s life.

Bull shit.

You didn’t want this disease any more than the next person. Why? Because the disease hurt; it hurt a lot. The worst thing about it was the fact that there was no actual cure. The disease itself was kill or be killed; kill your feelings, or kill yourself. There was not an actual cure. Scientists didn’t know how the flower itself blossomed in one’s lungs. They didn’t know how to cure it.

The worst part? The Hanahaki Disease claimed the lives of more people than traffic accidents and suicide combined. People weren’t necessarily scared of the disease. They were just… uneasy and you understood why.

One thing was for certain though; the Hanahaki Disease was based on genetics. So somewhere along the line, one of your family members was affected by this particular disease. Of course, your parents probably never even thought about the possibility, so they probably didn’t test if you had the gene.

Man, you really hated your parents sometimes.

You left the doctor’s office silently, eyes downcast. Your knees trembled from below you and you felt as if you could collapse any minute now.

“Aneko,” you murmured, stilling yourself and looking at her. “I didn’t cough when he was there.”

She frowns, “What do you mean?”

“When Akaashi was next to me, I didn’t cough a single petal. Not even once did I cough. I only did when class ended.” You showed her a weak smile before continuing. “It probably doesn’t mean anything though, does it?”

“This is why you need to talk to him,” she said before stepping in front of you with her hands on her hips. “You’re dying, (Y/N). That isn’t something you should be taking lightly.”

“I know,” you whispered, avoiding her eyes. “It’s not that easy you know. He has things to do and… he doesn’t need this right now.”

She nodded, continuing to walk down the street. “I’m a pretty shitty friend, huh?”

Your eyes widened, and you gape at her.

Quickening your pace to catch up to her, you glared. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“I don’t know how you’re feeling right now. I’ve never been in your situation and I… what am I supposed to say to you?” Her voice is rising and you noticed that she had stopped walking altogether. “You’re always the one taking the shots and helping me. You’re the one who introduced me to Eito. You’re the one who stays up late to help me with the assignments I put off. You’re the one helping everyone with their problems. You’re always giving, (Y/N), you’re always the one who puts others in front of yourself!”

Tears leaked out the sides of her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. You opened your mouth to say something but she cuts you off.

“This is the one time you’re meant to be selfish. This is the one time you’re supposed to put yourself first. All you do is give! People –” she choked on her tears before saying – “people envy you, you know? I envy you! You’re usually so happy… you’re so willing to help others, even if they’ve done you so much wrong!”

She wiped her tears with her arms, but they kept coming. “This – this is the one time you need help with something and I can’t even do anything!”

She’s crying harder and all you can do is watch on. Fat tears dropped to the cemented ground as she wails louder. “Be selfish for once, (Y/N)! Please… I can’t lose you!”

You’re crying now, too, but you don’t realise it until you taste the salty tears from the corner of your mouth. They spilled silently as you watch Aneko, your best friend, sob into the sleeves of her jumper .

If anyone was around, they would think that you were weirdos. Two random teenage girls crying their eyes out in the middle of the street wasn’t a natural occurrence.

You wipe your tears away with the back of your hand and offer her the most realistic smile you could muster. “Let’s head home, okay? We can binge that sports anime you’ve been meaning to watch.”

She sniffs, the last of her tears splashing to the floor. “Okay.”

***

You’re both late to school the next morning but you don’t really care. Aneko leaves at 5am to sneak into her house that was two blocks away from yours. You’re racing to gather your things so that you can do your homework in the bus.

After puking out another bucketful of rose petals in the bathroom, you’re bolting out the door to catch the bus. There were more places to sit now, and if this was any other circumstance, you would have sat as far away from Akaashi as you could.

‘TALK TO HIM!’ You order yourself and you do before you could change your mind.

You pulled out your geography homework. From the corner of your eye, you note how Akaashi’s eyes do an onceover of your work. Trying to block him out, you began to answer the questions.

What metropolitan area is the largest in the world not bordering a body of water?

What the heck? You blanched at the question. You don’t remember this being in the textbook! You screamed internally, and you have half a mind to pull out your phone to do some research.

“The answer is Johannesburg, South America,” a voice from beside you says helpfully.

You look up, your eyes are met with gentle navy eyes. Your cheeks burn as you look away. How is it possible to have such pretty eyes?

“Oh… thanks,” you mumble, and you let out a breath. “Hey, Akaashi?”

His eyes widen and he clears his throat. “Yes? Is everything okay?”

“Uh… thank you again for photocopying your notes! It was really nice of you! I would’ve gotten them from Aneko, but her handwriting is… questionable,” you laughed lightly, easing yourself into the conversation. “Thanks for caring, is all I’m trying to say.”

The smallest of smiles makes its way onto his face and he looks at you with sincerity. “I’ll always care, you know?”

“Wait, really?” You blink twice at him, confusion swirling in your chest.

He nodded at you, looking out the window. “I care more than you think.”

***

The conversation replayed in your head over and over again, and you can’t help but stare dreamily out the window. When lunch began, Aneko snapped her fingers in your face, bringing you out of your daze. You flush, looking up at her as she grinned down at you.

“So… what happened with Lover Boy over there?”

“Nothing,” you wave her off, trying to ignore the blood that rushed to your cheeks. “We just… talked.”

She wiggled her eyebrows at you teasingly. “So are you guys, like, together yet?”

“It’s not that easy,” you mutter, raising an eyebrow at her. “Love doesn’t just appear, it builds over several conversations and it takes time.”

“Not all the time; Eito and I had love at first sight,” she swooned lightly, and you rolled your eyes at her antics. “Anyway!” She exclaimed, slapping the table. “You have to talk to him more! You like him, right?”

“Obviously,” you deadpanned, giving her a look of amusement.

“Then go talk to him!”

With that, she pulled you out of your chair and pushed you out of the room.

You rolled your eyes, “That wasn’t very Plus Ultra of you.”

“(L/N)-san?”

You spun around to face the person, a small smile on your face. “Hi, Akaashi-san! Yeah, Aneko threw me out of the classroom.”

“Oh, I see,” he nodded in understanding.

“AKAASHIII!”

You jolted out of surprise, eyes widening when you see a third year look down at you.

Akaashi let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Bokuto-san. What are you doing here?”

“What’s wrong with seeing you? You’re annoyed of me, right?” A pout rested on his face, and you couldn’t help but question his strange hairstyle as you looked up at him.

“Um… hello? You’re Bokuto Koutarou, right? The captain of the volleyball team?” You forced a friendly smile.

“You must be (L/N) (Y/N)! Akaashi talks a lot about you!” He grinned at you with an owlish expression.

You felt your cheeks tinge red. “Really?”

“That’s enough, Bokuto-san. You’re scaring her,” Akaashi sighed before turning to you. “Ignore him. Do you want to watch our volleyball practice after school? You seem to be interested.”

You flush pink. “I don’t want to be a bother…”

“I invited you. It’ll be fine.” A small smile made its way onto his face. “I’ll take you after school.”

You grinned, “Okay!”

***

Aneko beamed at you, pinching your cheeks while she was at it. “Aw, (Y/N), I’m so proud!”

You rolled your eyes, pushing her hands away from your face. “He invited me to watch his volleyball practice; it’s not that big of a deal.”

“It is when you like him!” She cheered, the smile on her face widening. “You’re gonna cure that dumb disease and you’re gonna get a hot boyfriend. I rate that ten out of ten.”

You don’t respond, instead finding your phone much more interesting.

“Huh? What are you doing? (Y/N)…” You could practically hear the pout in Aneko’s voice.

You moved your hand away, blocking the screen so that she couldn’t see who you were texting. “I’m not doing anything.”

“Then show me!” She whined, before a sly smirk rested on her lips. “Oh, I see. You’re texting Akaashi, right?”

“What makes you think that?” You flushed, looking away from her.

Aneko grinned, patting your head in jest. “Have fun with him, (Y/N)! Don’t forget me, alright?”

You couldn’t help but laugh, knocking her hand once more. “Alright, alright. Now go away, Eito is waiting for you.”

She nodded, brushing her mousey brown hair out of her face. “Text me tonight, yeah?”

You hummed in agreement before turning back to your phone.

“(Y/N)-san,” a voice called out, and you felt your cheeks redden.

You let out a breath before smiling up at the setter. “You don’t have to add honorifics, Akaashi-san. We’re friends, right?”

“Then call me Keiji,” he offered, looking down at you.

“Keiji,” you said slowly before nodding. “Then call me (Y/N).”

“I’ve always liked your name,” he remarked nonchalantly. “Come on, we have to get to the gym, okay?”

With a slight skip in your step, you followed him to the Gym 03. He slid the door open, revealing multiple yellow and blue balls flying over volleyball nets. They flew from all directions, and stray balls seemed to be more dangerous than the actual people. The people in the volleyball team were tall, big, and intimidating. You couldn’t help the little shiver that crept up your spine.

You felt a hand rest on your shoulder and you looked up at Akaashi. He sent a reassuring smile your way.

“They’re not as scary as they look,” he promised, taking you up to the high rises. “They’re a bunch of babies when you get to know them.”

You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped your mouth. “I’ll take your word for it, then.”

Watching from above, you noticed the way everyone on the team worked together; how they cheered each other on and the way they dealt with Bokuto… everyone was a lot friendlier than you thought they were.

But all the peace and happiness you held was cut short as your stomach lurched and you felt your heart thunder in your chest. Your lungs suddenly started wheezing for air and you stumbled down the stairs. Trying your best to open the gym door as inconspicuously as possible, you bolted to the nearest bathroom to empty your lungs.

You gasped for air, coughing wildly as petals spilled out of your mouth and onto the walkway. Droplets of blood fell into the palms of your hands before inking the ground. Thorns tumbled out of your mouth, scratching and wounding your throat as you staggered to the bathroom, the metallic taste of blood filling your mouth and taking over your senses. Your left hand leaned against the side of the gym, and you tried your best to stabilize yourself, but trying seemed to be futile.

Sobbing from the pain, you fell to your knees as petals and rose buds fell out of your mouth. God, this could not be happening right now.

Breathing heavily, you furiously wiped the tears and sweat off your face. You looked around you at the mess of blood, flowers, and thorns. You stared at the dark green thorns that scattered around you, and you couldn’t help but feel another wave of dread wash over you. Why…? Why was the disease getting worse? You thought that everything was getting better; Akaashi was talking to you more and you were making so much progress with him as well! So why was it getting worse?

You sucked in a breath, trying to regulate your breathing as you wiped your tears away. Your lungs burned in your chest as you got up from the ground, trying your best to clean the mess you made. Somehow managing to make it look like someone didn’t commit murder with a bouquet of flowers, you made your way back to the gym.

Forcing a smile, you slid the gym door open. All eyes turned to you and you felt a blush rise to your cheeks.

“Um… I had to go to the bathroom,” you said shakily, avoiding any and all eye contact.

“You were gone for a while,” Akaashi noted, “are you feeling alright?”

“Yeah, I just needed to get some air, y’know?” You faked a laugh before waving him off. “I’m fine, really. Go back to practice, Keiji.”

He nodded silently, glancing back at you for a split second.

“AKAASHIII! It’s your serve!” Bokuto exclaimed. “NICE SERVE!”

Picking up the ball, Akaashi let his eyes wander to you as you sat at the high rises. He felt his heart tug in his chest as he threw up the ball to serve.

Don’t lie to me.

***

Practice ended a while later, and you had done your best to not gawk at your long-time crush. Sure, you have seen his games before, but that was live on a screen. This was different. Here you could feel the thud of the balls as they hit the floor violently, and you could feel the heat and exhaustion leaking off the players; you don’t feel that kind of thing through a screen.

“Thank you for letting me watch your practice,” you said, bowing respectfully at the coach and the two managers.

They smiled, and the coach replied, “You’re welcome back any time.”

“(Y/N), I can walk you to the bus stop if you would like?”

You felt yourself panic internally as you stood in front of the open door. You didn’t need to turn around to know who it was but you do anyway.

Opening your mouth to say ‘no’, you found that the only word that escaped your voice box was, “Sure.”

“I’ll change first, and then we can go.”

You answered with a slight nod, and the pain you felt just moments ago filled your thoughts. Shaking the feeling off, you waited by the gym doors.

“So, you and Akaashi?”

You felt your heart leap to your throat as you spun around to face the person. It was Suzumeda Kaori, one of the team managers on the volleyball team. She smirked at you, sending you a knowing look.

“We’re just friends,” you said bashfully, but on the inside you wished that what she said was true.

She didn’t believe you for a second, “Really?” She asked drily, the smirk on her face widening by a second. “So… you don’t like him?”

“I… never said that,” you said under your breath, and you felt your cheeks burn in embarrassment. “We’re just friends though. I doubt he even knew I existed until a few weeks ago.”

“Huh,” she remarked, before picking up a stray volleyball. “Whatever you say, (L/N)-chan.”

“(Y/N), are you ready?” Another voice cut in, and you nodded your answer to the question.

The walk to the bus stop was calm as the cherry blossoms fell and drifted over the two of you. It was nice, to say the least. Every so often, you found yourself glancing at the setter through the corner of your eye before forcing your gaze to turn back to the path. You groaned internally. You were falling harder, and the fact that you practically had a ticking time bomb planted in your lungs wasn’t helping.

“I’ve noticed you and Bokuto are really close. When did you meet?” You cringed slightly at the poor excuse of a conversation starter, but he didn’t seem to mind.

“I met him last year when I first went to the club. He said that my tosses were good,” he smiled slightly at the memory, and you felt your heart skip a beat.

“That’s pretty cool. He’s really loud, so I was surprised when I found out you were both friends.” You let out a small laugh.

He nodded in understanding, “I get that a lot. He’s not that bad when you get to know him. When I introduced you, you looked pretty intimidated.”

“I was… surprised. He’s really loud and he’s quite the character.”

“He’s a good guy; and he’s reliable.”

“I’ll take your word for it.”

Silence is the only thing that followed as you waited at the bus stop. Akaashi had taken sudden interest in his shoes, and you were trying to wrack your brain for a conversation starter.

“I forgot to ask,” he said, cutting the silence. “Are you feeling any better?”

You blinked at him, clueless for a moment before it dawned on you. “Oh, yeah, I told you I was fine, didn’t I?” You shot him a reassuring smile. “I was just feeling light headed in the gym. It was really warm.”

“Ah, right, that makes sense. I’m glad you’re feeling okay, (Y/N).”

Why was he able to make something as simple as your name sound nice? Blood rushed to your cheeks as the bus pulled to a stop, and the both of you took a seat. Cheeks still flushed red, you focused your vision on the window. There were a few scratch marks here and there, and you watched as the cars drove past. Red car, blue car, black car, black car, white ca-

“Are you hungry?” A calm voice questioned from beside you.

You opened your mouth to answer, but you didn’t need to.

Your stomach growled at the mention of food.

Keiji chuckled softly before handing you a curry bun. “Here.”

You eyed it warily, “Do you have one? I don’t want to eat your lunch or anything… and you’re the one who was doing the physical activity.”

“I have one right here,” he said, pulling out an identical bun. “Have it.”

You hesitated, but took it gratefully, taking small nibbles. “Thanks.”

The rest of the bus ride was relatively quiet, the both of you having small snippets of conversation throughout the ride. The bus lurched to a stop, and you glanced outside the window to check what stop you were at.

“Ah, this is my stop, Keiji. Thank you for accompanying me; it was really nice of you.” You grinned, showing a clumsy bow before picking up your bag. “Thanks for the food as well!”

“You don’t have to thank me, (Y/N). I’ll see you at school tomorrow.” He smiled gently.

With a final wave, you stepped off the bus before making your way to your house, cheeks warm and a goofy smile on your face.

Meanwhile, Akaashi sat in the bus, staring wistfully out the window. With a final sigh, he picked up his phone and clicked ‘call’ on a particular contact.

“Bokuto-san. I need your help.”

***

You returned to school the next day, expecting for the day to be the same as every other one but when you stepped into the classroom, you found a strange biological piece of matter on your table.

A single blue rose with all the thorns cut off on your desk. It was just… sitting there. You suddenly felt sick. Who the hell confesses to someone with a blue rose? Albeit, it was a very pretty flower, but it wasn’t something one would confess with. That is, if this one was a confession. What happened to the red and white roses at the flower shop? It was nowhere near Valentine’s Day or White Day, so there shouldn’t be a shortage of supply.

The only conclusion you could make was the fact that someone knew about your disease. Someone must have seen you. Your stomach churned with anxiety as you picked up the rose. There wasn’t a note to go with it, so there was no way for you to find out who delivered it to you. Then again, the rose might not have been for you.

“Ooh, Whatcha got there?”

You yelped at the sound of your best friend’s voice, nearly dropping the flower in your hands.

“Don’t creep up on me,” you grumbled, shooting a glare at her.

Aneko grinned, plucking the rose from your hands. “What’s this? From a secret admirer, maybe?”

“I think someone knows,” you said abruptly, crossing your arms over your chest. “Did you tell anyone?”

“What? You know I don’t talk to anyone but you and Eito and I didn’t mention anything to him.” She frowned, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “Maybe Akaashi knows?”

“Why would he know?”

“He invited you yesterday to watch practice. You did say that you had a coughing fit right?” A sly smirk made its way onto her face. “Maybe he got worried when you left the gym and followed you.”

You let out a sigh as you took a seat at your desk. Resting your chin on the palm of your hand, you looked at her expectantly. “He wouldn’t like me; he probably just thinks of me as a friend.”

Bending down to reach eye level with you, she flicked your forehead, and you yelped in pain. “Stop being a baby and tell him.”

“It’s not that easy!” You countered, rubbing the area she flicked. “I can’t just magically make the disease go away by confessing. He has to like me too!”

“You’re not making it any easier,” Aneko pointed out.

You shot her a fiery look, hitting the top of her head with a maths textbook. “Shut up, Aneko.”

She pouted at you before taking her seat. Akaashi entered the classroom moments later, taking his usual seat in front of you. You felt your heart hammer within your chest as you stared at his usual unruly mop of black hair.

You did your best to focus on the task at hand. However, trying to focus on a class you had zero interest in was becoming a problem. Staring at your very blank page of paper, you were very close to screaming. What was the lesson on again? Was this maths or geography?

“Ah, (Y/N), Eito wanted to talk to me about something. I’ll see you later!” Aneko exclaimed, and you brought yourself out of your reverie.

“Wait what?” You glanced around, but the classroom was pretty much empty.

“Wait, Aneko-”

But she was already out the door. You groaned, hitting your forehead against your table in frustration.

“I really should have paid attention,” you muttered to yourself, squeezing your eyes shut.

A small shuffling sound next to you snapped you out of your daydream and you looked up at the person.

“Keiji?” You couldn’t bring yourself to say another thing, your mouth opening and closing as you thought of what to say.

“You seemed to have trouble with the lesson,” he said gently, holding a book out to you.

You blinked at it warily before gingerly taking it. “You don’t have to do all this for me. And… how did you know that I couldn’t concentrate?”

“Aneko,” he responded, looking at you intently. “You can borrow my notes.”

You watched as his eyes wandered to the rose that was on your lap and you felt your cheeks burn. “Ah, this is nothing! It was on my desk and I guess someone put it there. I don’t know who, but-”

“Do you like it?” He asked, his eyes ghosting over your face.

“Yeah… it’s a shame it probably isn’t meant for me, though.” You offer a shy smile.

He nodded briskly before patting your shoulder. “Do you want to watch practice again today?”

“Really?”

“Why not? It gave everyone else motivation and you enjoyed it, right?”

“Yeah, I did! It was really cool watching everyone work together like that; your tosses were amazing! It seemed to get the whole team to bond. You’re really focused on the court. I guess you have to be when you’re the control centre of the team.” You shut your mouth abruptly, and your cheeks reddened even further. “Sorry, I’m rambling aren’t I?”

“I don’t mind,” he said tenderly, a strange fondness on his features. “We’ll go to the gym together at the end of the day.”

You beamed. “I look forward to it!”

***

The rest of the day goes smoothly. Well, as smooth as it could be. Halfway in your third period, you choked on a thorn and had to be excused for a full half-hour before returning to the class. For most people in the class, you were either faking to skip class or you were genuinely sick. Strangely enough, your teachers seemed to understand your situation and didn’t question when you left the class randomly.

Wonderful, you thought to yourself for the umpteenth time as all heads turned to you when you had returned to class, I’m absolutely pathetic.

You could still taste blood when you walked with Keiji to the gym, but holy shit, you wished that this could end.

And you realised that maybe it would end; very, very soon.

“Akaashi-kun!” A high pitched voice rang in your ears and you flinched slightly.

You and Keiji were just about to leave the school when a girl with bouncy yellow curls pushed her way between the two of you. You blinked, confused and rather insulted as you stumbled backwards, watching the girl cling onto Akaashi’s arm. You watched as his jaw clenched in agitation.

“Can I talk to you?” The girl asked with a sickeningly sweet smile as she side-glanced you before hissing, “Alone.”

He nodded wordlessly as he followed the girl.

You were no stalker; you were no eavesdropper either. Looking up at their retreating figures, you tried to find a reason as to why you should stay put. Your lovesick brain didn’t have a good enough reason.

“Akaashi-san, I like you!”

You choked as you clapped a hand over your mouth when you heard her high-pitched voice screech a confession.

“Thank you, but I like someone else,” Keiji’s monotone voice said, and you let out a breath of relief.

That was good, right? Maybe it was you! Or maybe it won’t be. You groan inwardly, steeling yourself as you listened to their conversation.

“I’m sure I can be better than her!” The girl exclaimed and you rolled your eyes.

“I’m sorry, but I like her very much.”

Oh. You slowly made your way back to where Akaashi had left you, thoughts running through your mind. How were you supposed to compete against her?

Moments later, Akaashi returned to your side, hands stuffed in his volleyball jacket.

“Did you wait long?”

“No, not really. The bus is coming, we should go.”

He nodded, wordlessly walking beside you. The silence that followed was, to say the least, awkward. You had a feeling he knew you were listening in to his conversation, and he knew you were uneasy about the entire situation. Tugging nervously at your bag strap, you couldn’t help the glances you sent from the corners of your eyes.

“Hey, Keiji,” you interrupted the silence and he turned to you, eyebrows raised as a signal to continue. “Uh… do you want my number? You can tell me when you have practice so I can bring extra food.”

“I don’t mind bringing you food, (Y/N),” he said, but a small smile was etched on his face. “I’ll give you my number, too then.”

And so, numbers were exchanged and the apples of your cheeks were flushed in happiness. That was progress, right?

The bus pulled to a stop, and you hopped up from your seat. “Thanks for walking me to the bus again. See you tomorrow!”

Dropping your bag to the floor, you slumped onto your bed, a small yawn slipping from your mouth.

From: Akaashi Keiji

Did you make it inside safely?

You grinned at your phone, quickly typing in a response.

To: Akaashi Keiji

Yep!

To: Akaashi Keiji

Thanks again for letting me come to practice!

From: Akaashi Keiji

Do you want to come to practice tomorrow?

You couldn’t hold back your squeal.

***

Three weeks passed in a blink of an eye and your friendships with the volleyball team grew. Aneko was still going out with Eito, and that would mark their second year of dating. Unsurprisingly, they dragged you into their two year anniversary, so you were forced to third wheel with them. That was when Aneko found out that you and Akaashi were texting a lot. She gave you hell for it.

“Four weeks,” Aneko remarked suddenly, crossing her legs as she rested against your bed.

You glanced up from your homework, “What do you mean?”

“You have exactly four months to live.” Hugging the pillow in her arms tighter, she looked up at you. “What are you gonna do about it?”

“What am I supposed to do about it?” You mutter, spinning your chair around to face her. “I’ve done everything I could.”

“But you haven’t even told him yet!” She countered, clenching her fists.

“I don’t have to tell him anymore! He…” You trailed off, recalling the words he spoke a few weeks prior.

“I like her very much.”

His words carwled back into your mind and you managed a wry smile. “He said he liked someone. That’s all I heard.”

“How do you know she isn’t you?” Jumping up from the floor, she shot you a pointed look. “Tell him you like him. There’s no point in both of you liking each other and not acknowledging it by confessing.”

“But what if it isn’t me? I’ll ruin a perfectly good friendship,” you argued, folding your arms over your chest as you reciprocated the look.

She groaned, grabbing hold of your shoulders. “Then he doesn’t deserve you. You have to tell him! The whole story!”

“No promises,” you laughed, shaking her hands off of you. “Get off!”

She rolled her eyes, the smile seemingly stuck on her face. “I’m really happy for you, (Y/N).”

“Thanks, Aneko,” you grinned up at her, “You’ve always supported me with everything.”

“Then support me with a meal!”

“Fine.”

***

Fortunately for you and Aneko, Akaashi had invited you to his usual Wednesday practice with the volleyball team. The whole team treated you like an extra manager, asking you to bring refills if they really needed it. Despite knowing that there were already two managers, you were perfectly happy with helping them out while you could. However, while the team was fine with you joining practice upon invitation, people seemed to take their enthusiasm for you being there an invitation in itself.

One of those people just happened to be Etsudo Emiko, the blonde girl who confessed to Keiji a few weeks ago. After he plainly rejected her the first time, she decided to take it upon herself to barge into the after school volleyball training. Unfortunately, when the other managers complained about her being a distraction to the team, Etsudo brought up the fact that you were allowed to watch the practices freely. As much as the coach wanted to take their side, he knew that the only way to get rid of Etsudo was to stop allowing you to attend the practices. The problem was, while Etsudo did virtually nothing to help the team, you motivated the team in multiple ways.

Nevertheless, Etsudo was allowed to attend the volleyball practices if she didn’t bring anyone else to which she swiftly agreed. Hence, the three weeks of patience testing began.

“Keiji! You did so good!” Etsudo’s high pitched voice reverberated through the gym.

The rest of the team let out quiet groans as the girl ran down the stairs to latch onto the setter’s arm. He let out a frustrated sigh, tugging his arm away from her. Not relinquishing, she trailed after him, completely unabashed.

“Am I the only one who hates her?” Kaori asked, her nose scrunching in disgust as she pumped a volleyball with more air. “You’re the one who likes Akaashi. I’m surprised you can even stand to be in the same room as her.”

“She’s totally annoying,” Shirofuku Yukie, the other manager, remarked. “The whole team knows that there’s something going on between you and Akaashi.”

You managed a small smile, “There’s nothing going on between Keiji and me. He probably doesn’t even like me that way.”

The both gave you a piercing look. “Are you stupid?” They asked together.

You don’t respond, eyes trailing back to Keiji. Etsudo was still clinging onto him, pouting up at him with her big green eyes.

A small cough erupted from your throat, and a lone petal found its way into the palm of your hand.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” you said awkwardly, dropping the ball you were holding to the floor.

“Are you-”

“I’m fine,” you responded by default, “I’ll be back in ten.”

With that, you ran out of the gym, a hand over your mouth as more petals dared to fall.

Why was the bathroom so far away?

You gasped for air as petals and thorns spilled to the ground, your tears following after them. Blue rose buds stained with blood escaped your throat as the metallic taste filled your mouth as dark red thorns scraped the delicate skin. The pads of your fingers dig into the red brick wall, the skin scratching as you dropped to your knees.

Despite the obvious pain and the salty tears that streaked down your cheeks, you couldn’t help the sarcastic laugh that you let out.

“Déjà vu really is the worst.”

A violent cough erupted once more, and you inhaled a shaky breath as more petals drifted to the concrete floor. As they did, the gentle patting of footsteps distracted you for a moment before the footsteps stopped directly beside you. Panic rose inside your chest. You needed an explanation!

While you wracked your brain for an excuse, a hand rested in the middle of your back.

“Breathe, (Y/N),” a gentle voice whispered.

If you died now, would Aneko kill you?

… Probably.

Your coughing died down after several minutes, and you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, eyes trained to the mess in front of you.

“What are you sorry for?” Akaashi questioned, crouching down to be level with you.

“I’m disturbing practice, aren’t I? What’s Bokuto gonna do without you?” You shot a teasing smile at him, but it didn’t quite meet your eyes.

Keiji sighed at your answer. “Don’t answer with another question, (Y/N).”

“Sorry,” you said automatically, cheeks flushing in embarrassment. “I didn’t want you to see me like this.”

“Who is it?”

“What?” You stuttered out a response, looking up at him for a second.

“Who is it?” He repeated, his gunmetal eyes boring into yours.

“Why do you want to know?” You asked, getting up from the ground to gather your mess. “It’s not important, anyway.”

He was silent as he rose to his full 6 feet form looming over you. “Not important?” He repeated, mostly to himself than to you. “How can you say that about yourself?”

“Well I’m obviously not lying,” you countered, pointing to the floral monstrosity at your feet.

The muscles in his jaw tightened, and you noticed the way played with his fingers. He was worried – nervous, maybe. “You can die from this. I’m not as oblivious as you think I am.”

A sarcastic laugh erupts from your throat, but it comes out more as a strangled chuckle. “Sure, Akaashi. Whatever you want to believe.”

The look on his face darkens, and you avert your eyes from his. When was the last time you used his last name? His watchful eyes glanced over your face, trying to read your emotions. If he could read Bokuto, he would be able to read you, right?

Absolutely.

“I know you’re scared, (Y/N). You need help to get better.”

“Do I, though?” The eye roll you pulled off had you feeling a little guilty, but at this point you were done with everything. “I don’t need to get better.”

“Why do you keep saying that?” He demanded, the tension in the air growing thicker by the second.

“Maybe because it’s true!”

“I’m saying it’s not!”

He let out a frustrated grunt, eyes shutting for a moment as he thought of what to say. “You mean a lot to everyone.”

You scoff, “really?”

“Have you thought about Aneko-san, your parents, the team? What about-” He stops short, shutting his jaw closed as he averted his gaze.

“What about what?” You ask tentatively, your eyes still fixated on the mess in front of you.

“… Me.”

Your eyes flickered to him, the slight hunch of his shoulders as he stood.

“Have you…” A forced smile made its way onto your face. “Have you considered the possibility that he might be you?”

The silence that followed seemed to taunt you and you berated yourself internally. Did you hear wrong? Did he say something else? Maybe you were mistaken.

In split seconds, you felt a pair of gentle arms surround you, wrapping you in warm embrace. You had the slight temptation to laugh – were you in some shoujo manga or something? But instead, you return the hug, burying your face into the crook of his neck.

“I really like you, Keiji.”

“… I really like you too.”

***

~The End~

All characters except for the reader and my OC’s (listed below) are the work of Haruichi Furudate (古館春一). This is not part of the canon work by any means. I do not claim ownership over the characters or the Haikyuu storyline and plot. Without Furudate Sensei’s work, myself as well as many other writers are unable to create these stories.

My OC’s:

Fukuhara Aneko(福原あねこ)

Hasegawa Sakura (長谷川さくら)

Emiko Etsudo (えつどうえみこ)

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queen-of-the-avengers · 4 years

Text

Pick A Side

Characters: Steve Rogers x Stark!Reader, Tony Stark

Word Count: 1,886

Warnings: angst, captain america civil war and sokovia accords spoilers

Request by @previouslyforgotten: Alright this takes place during CACW and the reader is Tony’s daughter. He expects her to take his side but she takes Steve’s side. Maybe bc she thinks it’s right idk? But she’s like “I love you dad, but you can’t ask me to not choose what I think is right”?? And maybe make it buckyxreader. Or maybe Steve? Or whoever it doesn’t matter. But I’ve had this in my mind for awhile and I figured I’d ask.

Summary: You’re a Stark, so people expect you to take your father’s side on everything. When the Sokovia Accords are presented, you have a choice to make: will you take your father’s side or the side you believe in? What will it do to your family?

Squares Filled: captain america for my second card of @star-spangled-bingo // rivarly for my second card of @avengersbingo // balconies/rooftops for my second card of @happystevebingo

Author’s Note: If you have any requests, please send them in! This is unbeta’d and any and all mistakes are all on me.

Being Tony’s daughter is something hard to live by. It holds a high standard for everyone who hears it. People expect you to show up to events, to be as smart as your father, to protect those when they ask, to be a hero even though you don’t know how to be one, and to make sacrifices that a normal eighteen-year-old wouldn’t dare to make. Being Tony’s daughter has put a lot of strain onto your life, but you knew one thing to be true: if you hadn’t been his daughter, you wouldn’t have met any of the people you live and work with.

And what wonderful people they are.

The person you grew closest to would have to be Natasha. She understands how suffocating Tony can be, so she offers you a place to rewind and let go of everything that is bothering you. She knows a bit too much about being trapped inside your own head, to have so many people relying on you to do the right thing and to show up and to be what they expect, and she takes that all away.

The person you love to have fun with is Bucky. He’s the one you go to when you need to get out of the house. Despite being trapped with HYRDA, he does know how to have a good time. He grew up in Brooklyn in the 1940s, he loves to dance, be outside, to hike, to be involved with nature in every way possible. He finds peace in doing that, and you love to join him.

The person you love to learn about magic is Wanda. She is always looking for an excuse to show off her powers, and you go to her whenever you want to learn about what she can do. She manipulates minds, and you admit to asking her to make you see what a world would be like if there were no problems and everyone is happy. It’s a delusion, but you just want to live at that moment even if it is for a few minutes. She’s loyal and trusting, and she’s a really good friend to count on.

The person you go to about knowledge is Thor. He knows everything about all the worlds in the Nine Realms. He introduced you to Heimdall who showed you what he can do. Thor is a crazy and silly friend, but his heart is always pure. He makes you laugh when you’re feeling sad, and you trust him with your life.

The person you go to about science is, of course, Bruce. The people you go to about athletic skills are Sam and Clint. The people you go to learn about the new world are Shuri and T’Challa. When you have an existential crisis is Vision. You have so many people to fall back on, and you are so grateful to have each of them in your life. Being Tony’s daughter allows you to have so many opportunities that not a lot of people are going to have.

Steve, though, well, he’s a completely different story. He’s all of those put together and more. He is your other half--when he hurts, you hurt. When he is passionate, you feel it too. When he cries, you want to sob. Everything you feel is because of him. He holds your heart like no one else does. He provides you with a home, safety, and comfort. You don’t just trust your life with the man, your life is the man. You live for him. You breathe for him. You fight for him. Everything you do is for him. Your love for him is so strong, you sometimes cry at night by yourself because you just get so overwhelmed with your feelings for him that it physically hurts.

You’re more like him in more ways than one. You have the exact same serum inside your body as he does, and that makes you the second Captain America to walk the face of the Earth. Everyone calls you Major America since you’re much younger than Steve, and Major is one rank below a Captain. As a joke, everyone thought it was funny to have your suit be just like his, but you’re not complaining. Captain America’s suit is very sexy and tight-fitting. Out of all the suits you’ve seen the team wear, Steve’s is the best. Although, you are a bit biased. Your love for him makes you think everything he does is sexy and right. You are caught in his web, and you’re not sure if you want to be untangled from it.

Yet, no one knows about you and him.

There are some suspicions, but nothing had been confirmed with most. Natasha, Vision, Thor, and Wanda know, but they don’t say anything about it. You tell Natasha everything, Wanda sees Steve in your mind when you picture complete happiness, Thor hears you ask Heimdall about Steve all the time when you’re with him, and Vision is just too smart not to know. They all keep your secret, but you’re not sure how much longer you two can go on without your father knowing.

You want to tell him, but you’re at a point in your life where you need to choose which side you want to be on; the side of justice or the side of family? The government wants to pass a thing called the “Sokovia Accords” that states they get to regulate people that have “superpowers” and dictate where they are needed and when they get to help. The events that led up to that were, of course, what happened in Sokovia with Ultron, the attack on New York with Loki and his alien army, the battle of Triskelion in Washington D.C when Bucky was the biggest threat there was at the time, and the most recent attack in Lagos, Nigeria between the Avengers and Brock Rumlow or Crossbones.

Tony picked the side the government is on along with Natasha, Rhodey, Vision, T’Challa, and the newest member, Peter Parker. Steve has the rest on his team. Everyone is waiting for you to make a decision, and it’s the worst decision you ever had to face. There is too much at state on either side, so you don’t exactly know what to do. Well, you do, but one of the two most important men in your life isn’t going to like it.

On one hand, Tony is your father, and he took you in after your mom died. He’s given you everything you could have ever dreamed of and more. He’s the best father a girl could ask for. He’s been there for you through thick and thin, and you owe him your life. There is nothing you wouldn’t do for that man.

On the other hand, Steve is the love of your life. Your soul combines with his making him the only person in the entire world who not only gets you but completely understands you. There are times where you don’t even have to say a word, and he knows what you’re going to say. It makes those emotional times go by very easily.

Your mind is telling you to pick your father’s side because he had your back and now its time for you to have his. However, your heart is telling you to pick Steve’s side because these accords will rip this team in two. Yes, a lot of people have died because of these attacks, but you also saved billions by preventing catastrophes. If it weren't for you and your team, there would be aliens killing all of New York with a psychotic maniac as their leader, Ultron would have wiped out humanity so that he could start fresh wit obedient robots at his feet, and many more attacks.

These accords aren’t what’s good for your team and humanity, and like you said earlier, one of two most important men in your life just isn’t going to be happy with what you pick.

“Y/N, it’s time to make a decision. Are you going to sign or not?” your father asks.

All eyes are on you inside the conference room. You’re legally allowed to make this kind of decision, and since you have the same serum in your body, you have a say whether or not these accords are going to be a law or not. Tears threaten to spill over your eyes as you grasp the paperwork in your hand. He’s going to hate you, you can feel it.

“Y/N?” Tony asks once more.

“I love you, Dad,” you begin with a cracked voice and end with a whisper, “but you can’t ask me to not choose what I think is right. I’m sorry, I’m not signing.”

You push the paper away just as a few tears rolled down your cheek. You can’t seem to look at your dad in the eyes because you know you’ll see the hurt, anger, and betrayal you have left on his soul. Steve knows how hard this is on you, so he takes matters into his own hands.

“You’re not being serious right now, right?” your dad asks angrily.

“Tony don’t do this. You know she did what she thought was right,” Steve steps in.

“Like hell, she isn’t. She’s only doing this because she’s fucking you,” he snaps.

More tears spill over your eyes as you got up and hastily leave the room. This is painful as it is, you don’t need your father telling everyone that he thinks you only did this because you’re shacking up with the head leader of the other side. You don’t know where you’re going, but as soon as you take a step outside, you let out a loud sob. You’ve walked right onto a balcony, and you’re grateful no one is going to see you breaking down. Your knees buckle and you almost fall, but familiar and strong arms catch you before you hit the ground.

“He hates me,” you sob into Steve’s chest.

He brings you over to one of the patio chairs and sets you down on it.

“He doesn’t hate you,” Steve sighs.

“I can’t choose his side. I can’t believe that these accords are a good thing for us. Fighting against them is the right thing to do, and I hoped he’d just see that. I didn't even know he knew. God!” you sob more.

Steve doesn’t know what to say that would make you feel better right now. Instead, he decides to hold you, comb his fingers through your hair, and make sure you know that he isn’t going anywhere right now. It’s not fair how your father is treating you, but he’s going to make sure you understand you have someone on your team to back you up.

These accords are a bad thing, and if you can get everyone on your father’s side to see that, then maybe you can start the process of healing.

However, you know you’re never going to get to that stage because just like you, your father is a very stubborn man. You’re not sure what’s going to happen with the two of you after this is over. One side has to win; you just hope it doesn’t destroy the relationship you have with your dad.

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#star-spangled-bingo #avengersbingo #happystevebingo #steve rogers x stark!reader #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fic #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers fan fiction #steve rogers fan fic #steve rogers fiction #captain america #captain america x reader #captain america fanfiction #marvel #marvel fan fiction #marvel fanfiction #mcu #mcu fanfiction

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itslula1991 · 4 years

Text

My Jewel (In Corrections)

Hello everyone! I am very sorry for the delay in uploading this chapter but the inspiring muse is failing me lately. Here is the second part, sorry if this is too long. I hope you enjoy ❤️

Genre: Adventure, comedy, romance, fantasy

Summary

An ancient spell causes a millenary young lady to weaken, it is up to Larry and her friends to help her find the key to return her to normal while an unknown woman, along with three known individuals, and in order to proclaim her “how hers,” she try to take over a captive jewel somewhere in Egypt. (The shock of all the chaos in the girl).

Objective? The guard and the exhibits must prevent it from falling into the wrong hands while between Ahkmenrah and the girl, a romance will slowly emerge that will bear fruit over time.

Chapter 2

Nowadays…

After graduation he was able to move to a fabulous place in Queens, without any more instability, without any more worries about unpaid bills and all thanks to his good salary as a teacher when getting the job in the same career in which he was oriented for a better life. However, at night Larry still worked as a nightstand at the New York Museum of Natural History, because after all for his wax, metal and polyurethane friends, he is a hero so to speak.

Larry mentioned: "Follow everything as it was the last time.", walking happily as he toured his workplace.

"Not much has changed, Lawrence. Except for one detail.", Mr. Roosevelt mentioned in his peaceful voice.

Larry frowned in confusion: "I've been out of the museum for over three years due to my studies and I'm not very aware, what is it about?"

The sky razo remained the same, like all the inhabitants, revived by the magic of the table of Ahk, who walked their house going from one place to another, browsing other exhibitions than their own, in themselves continued the consistency of each of the corners of the enclosure in details, also the floating floor of warm color, waxed and always slippery as usual. What could have changed over the years?

Well, Larry's curiosity was answered by Mr. Roosevelt when he pointed to a museum space where a pretty girl with ornaments and Egyptian clothing, she was sitting on the bench in a neutral room conversing animatedly surrounded by four girls from different times, a girl Colonial, an Italian girl, a Greek girl and a Native American girl, sitting on the floor the women listened to her narrate, perhaps a funny story about her because the women laughed along with the young woman.

But not everything ended there, hidden behind a showcase with artifacts from the first African tribes, King Ahkmenrah allowed his striking eyes to be seen above a vessel at the level of his nose, observing the lady in question. It could be seen how the polychromatic orbs radically mutated from a deep tourmaline pigment to a brilliant green-water, and everything indicated that the change was connected according to their mood, making their eyes clearer, denoting joy or darker, showing absolute sadness, and in this case it seemed that the green color exposed light to all its essence.

"She is new, I hadn't seen her before I temporarily retired from here."

"She's a lovely young lady.", Teddy commented with acceptance towards her.

Larry smiled looking at the scene: "So that detail is Ahk and the Egyptian girl."

"This is Larry.", Sacajawea contributed her good eyesight being sweetly taken by the arm by Teddy. "Ahkmenrah has not skipped a day since she appeared. They are the same as two young people from this time playing to fall in love."

Sacajewea was tenderly made by the king to spend hours at random, other times too, choosing the hiding place behind the plants of Africa spying on that particular someone.

"I still remember the day the boy first saw the young woman.", Teddy smiled at the two teenagers.

**** Flash ****

A month ago...

It was night, and there was a little party, maybe it was the one that Larry started attending night classes to get his teaching degree.

Nothing particular happened as King Ahkmenrah came down from that balcony leaving Jed and Octavio in charge of the music.

Since Doctor McPhee already knew everything that was happening with the tablet, it was not surprising to see a figure come to life, so wandering next to one of them was not considered nonsense either.

It turned out that the aforementioned was a beautiful Egyptian girl, with light skin, hazel eyes, long brown hair, sandals, a fine long kalasiri (dress) with two straps that covered her bust made in real white linen with bows gold at his waist. She, too, was wearing a kind of short cape covering her shoulders, a two-piece cylindrical snake bracelet adorning her left arm, a small crown with a baby cobra, and a delicate pendant in the shape of a winged golden and green beetle with an ankh completing the young woman's outfit.

Ahkmenrah's face said it all, it seemed that everything happened in slow motion in his mind.

"Wow...", Ahkmenrah whispered as if he were seeing a wonder of the ancient world. "By Ra and all the gods."

Ahk's face lit up as he was dazzled by the bubbling chestnut. It was as if he were in a dream.

When he saw her speak willingly next to the Museum Director on one of the stairs, he was fascinated. No matter what she was doing, he smiled and his eyes filled with love and wonder. Ahkmenrah did not miss a single movement of the pretty girl, standing next to the desk watching her with a half-twisted smile and her gaze was as if billions of stars lit up within her eyes. The boy was indeed in love, and although not any woman managed to shake his heart as the Sheik of a harem in the past, she instantly shot him or, as the cliché is vulgarly said, love at first sight.

“I had not seen a museum more impressive than this one. It's amazing.”, she was so happy.

“I am extremely pleased that you feel comfortable, Your Highness. I will leave you with the figures of the establishment so that you can get to know the place. Miss.”, Doctor McPhee said goodbye with respect and she made a slight bow allowing her withdrawal.

Like everything an Egyptian goddess, she glamorous went down the stairs, the girl moved exploding sensuality and with a comic touch when everything happened in slow motion to the rhythm of the background music.

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She ran her hair back with one hand, blinking coquettishly looking around while some exhibits threw roses at her, adoring her presence, therefore she greeted with extremely overwhelmed and gratefulness as she slid down the hall, seeming to parade like a 1999 BC model.

And to all this Ahk thought that she addressed him with that hip shake, he enlarged his smile but it was not, she followed long and the comical sound of when one track is run to another, made him raise an eyebrow reflecting a little disappointment. However, he continued absorbed in his thoughts without taking his eyes off each line of the toned and fine female figure, wandering in those curves when Mr. Roosevelt's voice made him come out of that trance.

"I don't want you to be the same as me.", Teddy spoke solemnly.

Ahkmenrah was half foolish trying to spin his answer well: "What do you mean?"

“In the sense that I have spent more than 50 years observing and not daring to say a word to my dear Sacajewea until Larry's arrival prompted me to do so. Do not hesitate or let her escape, Your Majesty.”, Teddy wisely advised as the boy sighed looking at the Egyptian girl.

The young woman with an unknown name detailed every corner and she never realized that those jade eyes did not lose sight of her.

Sac spoke very sweetly: "Teddy?", Appearing on the scene as she wrapped her arms around Mr. Roosevelt and inevitably smiled.

"He knows what he's doing, love."

It seems that the words of Mr. Roosevelt encouraged the king to arm himself with courage, inflate his chest, accommodate his deshret (crown) and approach her to relate, establish a bond, perhaps.

"This is so beautiful.", she whispered fascinated looking at the divine building and how the party continued with its magic.

"Hello.", Ahkmenrah finally said with real elegance behind her.

She gently spun on her axis as she was distracted watching the constellations form mirror balls illuminating the room in soft blue. The pretty girl greeted him with a friendly smile once they were face to face.

"Hello."

"What is your name?"

"I am Larempteh.", she introduced herself with singular elegance.

And Ahkmenrah raised an eyebrow detailing her peculiar appearance at a considerable distance, she had almost no makeup, just a little soft brown shade that accentuated her sweet eyes and bushy lashes, kohl for a discreet black liner and lipstick lipstick, privileged to possess the fleshy. Beautifull.

"High Blue Sapphire of the Nile, fourth queen of the fifth great king and sovereign of the reign of my pharaohs. It is a pleasure.", Larempteh added with graceful finesse in his speech.

She was not conceited, only that the way of presenting herself in the ancient world was that way when you were belonging to the nobility of Upper Egypt, and her voice was a caress with words for him since the girl was cordial, warm and very respectful , in addition to sweet and possessing that mix between shy and intellectual. She illuminated the whole place only with her presence.

"What a beautiful name.", Ahkmenrah recognized and she smiled, she was hypnotic and Ahk's eyes could not detach from the young woman for any reason. "Excuse me, I don't look at girls like that."

Larempteh excused him with a pleasant laugh: "Don't worry, it's fine. For that you have a view, you appreciate what you see."

"Also your English is perfect, you speak divinely, where did you learn?"

"I went to Cambridge University."

Ahkmenrah was amazed with a smile.

"Were you in Cambridge?"

"On display..."

"From the Egyptology Department?", both agreed in the sentence with surprise.

"Yes, that's right! What a coincidence!"

"Have you been there too? Wow, that's great."

"Is this your first night at the museum?"

"No, I came here in 1954 from the Giza expedition.", Larempteh said.

"How come I have never seen you before?"

"Here or Cambridge?"

"Both answers have value."

"Well, I arrived there in 1940 and have spent 14 years in my sarcophagus."

"That explains a lot."

"Yes. And here they kept me away in the warehouse until they created my showroom just around the corner from your showroom. I have had so few visitors interested in the old world that all this time I have been around my exhibition and never dared to abandon it, habit, melancholy perhaps... It is difficult to detach yourself from Cambridge once you belong 14 years."

"Indeed. It feels weird."

"It would also be due to the fame of a little docile nature that was instilled in us and I did not want to be feared by the other exhibitions. Apparently, today I took a lot of courage after 66 years being here and I left tonight finding a beautiful place."

Larempteh apparently hinted at Ahkmenrah, but Pharaoh did not catch that eulogy in the air.

"I understand you."

"I must add that it may be by fate, I would say."

"And why were we in different temples?", Ahkmenrah joked.

Larempteh found a cute shoulder: "Or maybe the gods had prepared our meeting for a suitable moment and I think it worked today."

"It is wonderful and you believe in destiny, that is fabulous."

She gave him a sweet smile with the music still playing in the background and neither she nor he stopped inspecting each other, reviewing his features, the most prestigious in her and manly in him. Larempteh decided to cut the air to get into the conversation a little more.

Larempteh said: "And, you're from around here I guess or..."

"I belonged. I am a limited time conservation."

She was stunned, Larempteh asked, "Limited time conservation?"

Ahkmenrah gave the queen a cute smile.

"Yes, I am a British museum of treasures."

She frowned and asked a little confused: "What?"

That's where the voice came into play in the king's mind.

"Great Ahk, now you will look like a clown from 4000 BC for the rest of your life."

Ahkmenrah was slow to process his own words, what he least wanted was to be an idiot in front of her and accidentally he did, he mentally reprimanded himself for the inconsistency he had just said, feeling ashamed for possibly making a bad impression within minutes of having her known.

The pharaoh spluttered trying to accommodate the correct sentence in her brain while she paid no attention to anything other than the strong blush of shame that formed from her cheeks to the bridge of her nose, therefore Larem smiled attentively at that detail. because it made her feel tender that there was still a young man like him and that she blushed in such a way, and that made him more nervous.

His throat went dry, his usej suffocated him, and Ahk swallowed thickly, omitting such awkwardness.

He adjusted his voice and said: "No, I meant that I am part of the treasures of the British Museum."

"No problem, I understood.", Larempteh laughed lightly. "And what is your name?"

"I am Ahkmenrah, the fourth king of the fourth king, the ruler of the lands of my parents and the pleasure is all mine."

Ahkmenrah showed up bowing in his presence showing Larem cordiality when he kissed the back of the queen's hand, she could not believe that that kind of young man with approximately 18 years of age, a classic conservation of 4000 years, was real. Like the man she dreamed of all her life but hearing the boy's name, she divinely opened her eyes at a certain surprise of having him face to face.

"For Isis! Are you the famous Ahkmenrah?”, Larempteh questioned with deep happiness.

Ahkmenrah frowned in confusion: "Famous?"

"Yes, in Cambridge. All the time the museum figures have talked about you, you are an icon there. By Ra! I can't believe it, I didn't think I had the chance to meet you one day and... Oh, what happiness! What an honor, son of the Sun. You must be considered a legend in the history of Egypt, not many reach one of the most remarkable and visited venues in the world as the British museum. It is a luxury that you are there then, you are very lucky.”

"Yes, I do not know if I am as important a figure in the history of Egyptian humanity as Ramses was, I knew later that he was more important than me."

"But you must have had fabulous feats to have been a part of here in the past as well."

“I suppose, although I don't entirely remember it, my memory has always been blank since I arrived. I mean, I wish they would help me a little more to understand myself and to know who I am apart from my name because all I know is that my determining home is there because my family is there. But sometimes I am only treated as a piece of archaeological piece from my Era.”

The glitter in Ahk's eyes faded slightly.

Larempteh grieved: "Oh what a shame they make you feel like this because you are a very nice boy."

Ahkmenrah analyzed the girl's words, the pharaoh blushed timidly again, his face was a poem and he frowned with a vague smile thinking that she could not not get over you by not resisting her charms.

Larempteh had a blush when reformulating his sayings: “Sorry, I didn't mean it like that, it was not my intention to bother you. I mean, you're cute in the sense of your soul.”

“You don't care, I've never been told before. It is precious that it comes from you. Thank you."

Larempteh smiled at Ahk's intense gaze, wiping a slight perspiration from her dress against her palms.

"You do not have to thank. After all, you do have a splendid shine and impressive eyes, they attract attention, they are very pretty.”

Ahkmenrah did 'the thing' with his smiling mouth, showing off his defined cheekbones.

"And maybe it must be because I just have them in the middle of my face.”, Ahkmenrah built a good sense of humor in which she laughed refinedly. "I also like your eyes, they are very warm and sweet. Since they are conspicuous and shocking to the delight of others, it would be considered a crime not to appreciate them in such a way nor are they how to be wasted.”

Queen Larempteh's eyes sparkled. An action that made her smile.

"Thank you. So your family is in the British museum, huh? It's great to have your parents nearby in one place or someone by your side to remind you of where you came from.”

“Yes, the boys made me stay close to them and it was also to keep my board safe. But don't worry, it's just a long story that I'll tell you already.”

"Okay, no inconvenience.", Larempteh said quietly.

"And where are yours?"

"I do not know. I am adrift just like you with my mind.”

"Oh I'm sorry."

"Do not worry, nothing happens. I suppose it is part of our life as museum exhibits having to find pieces of ourselves at random to feel complete. It's just a matter of divine intersession.”

"We can change the subject if you want."

"As you like."

Ahkmenrah watched her closely: "Dynasty XIX? I suppose."

"Yes, how did you know?", Larempteh cackled with sophistication.

She was charmingly curious to tuck a strand of hair behind her right ear, revealing one of her sparkling triangle-shaped hoops and elegant burgundy nail varnish.

"About the above, it is that you have an unseen face and it is impossible for you to go unnoticed. My guess is that you happen to be an old relative with proximity to Nefertari's family ancestors or perhaps it is because she has reincarnated in you."

Ahkmenrah learned to maintain his cordiality by behaving like a great nobleman, he was taught that his feelings should be fair and necessary before anyone but it seems that Larempteh appeared only to make him break the rules, disobeying his archaic teachings.

Well, Ahk always did, but Larem made it worse, like a fever with no disastrous results.

What he could never hide was a dazzled observing of her tangible beauty, he winked at her giving her a warm smile indirectly telling Larempteh how extremely beautiful she was.

Perhaps the young man hinted that the girl would be a descendant of the most important queen that Egypt had, making her an extremely attractive goddess for her taste and reach.

Larempteh thought, "No, I don't think that's the case either. Well, one knows who it comes from to reincarnate as a living human god on Earth, but one of my parents may have had the honor of belonging to the offspring of the Nefertari's lineage from the many children she had. Perhaps I am some great-granddaughter or great-great-granddaughter, as were the many siblings I had."

"The hundreds of kings who claimed your love should tell you."

Ahkmenrah guessed vehemently. And how not to do it? If she radiated sweetness and owned an exquisite exotic image; how it was not possible that the kings would not argue the hand of that venerable woman.

"No, well, yes, in part, but it was my older sister who received ninety-nine point nine percent of all these courtships.", Larempteh let out a natural laugh.

"Sister.", Ahkmenrah was not interested, rather he was unsuspecting. Shocked by the fact that her beauty is not praised.

"Yes. You see, Dad wanted two male rulers, one who was a strong pharaoh and who knew how to command the kingdom and another who was a champion in battles, especially in Kadesh. As you see, it could not be, he had my sister and me some time after that event. And considering that my father's wish was fulfilled very late, yes, he had more secondary children, but she and I were the eldest daughters of the family and for Real rules we had the privilege of direct access to lead a nation for being of pure lineage. Although something happened along the way and it was damaged or rather someone made history change its course regarding that. A long story that I will tell you.", Larempteh commented with a frown with a smile naturalizing his story.

"And why her and not you, how is that possible?", Ahkmenrah used a tone of Royal disbelief.

"It was just that she was extremely beautiful.", Larempteh just shrugged her shoulder in a cute way continuing the thread of praise. "She was so crazy though."

"I am sure she does not exceed the honey of your voice or your delicate presence.", Ahkmenrah said raising his jaw with elegant bearing.

The young queen did not know where to look, and of course, if Ahk's electric eyes did not dare to detach themselves from his youthful features.

Larempteh was intimidated by these charming courtships and tilted her face to the side a little hiding a faint blush keeping a thin smile as she tilted her head to later observe him.

"Excuse my daring but I couldn't stop watching you since I saw you. It's just that you're more beautiful than the Giza pyramids.", Ahkmenrah complimented her and the girl felt another strong blush take over her face.

In a delicate tone, Larempteh said: "How divine.", stunned with a slightly strange smile wandering her lips for all the praise she got from him.

"I spent 54 years wrapped in dirty linen bandages, locked in a sarcophagus and after waking up 66 consecutive nights to meet you, that's divine. You are a precious, beautiful creature."

Ahkmenrah after that praise, smiled sideways showing his immaculate teeth, without showing lewdness or perversion, it was like a seductive tactic in him.

The queen laughed in elegant confusion as she said: "Thank you?"

Obviously, in her time she was not very familiar with more than 100 compliments in a row due to her real beauty and so many coming from a single pharaoh, it was something intense but that was still a nice touch on her part.

"Don't be thankful since the pharaohs used to have an aggressive and unkind image. You should be suspicious.", Ahkmenrah commented regaining his posture of standing up.

Larempteh said: "I'll be careful then."

And her whispering was a little less than what's called suggestive, perhaps being eerily suggestive was a healthy seduction tactic to start the romance game.

"Although if someone stands between me and your beauty, probably the king of 4000 years ago, perhaps he will make an exception. But as long as none of that happens..."

"I knew what pharaohs were like in our time. Not tolerant, only in tiny exceptions.", Larempteh reaffirmed.

Ahkmenrah leaned down again, bringing the female hand to her lips, placing a kiss on her knuckles.

"I am kind, believe me not unless..."

The pharaoh straightened up, winking at the girl again so she smiled at him causing Ahk to wrap himself in the infinite tenderness of her beautiful grimace and lose herself in the brilliance of her precious eyes.

Maybe it was because of an attraction that burned inside her or an irrepressible instinct to want to touch her, even if it was to take something from her to remember her before returning to the darkness of her sarcophagus, extinguishing that sadness and going to 'sleep' happily and waking up a bit more alive by an obtension, and then the pharaoh felt the need to approach very slowly to Larem's face reviewing his eyes for each of its smooth details directing his lips to hers, who incidentally, looked at that mouth with reverie.

Larempteh for her part closed her eyes at the preamble of the stimulus in which her heart beat a thousand times stronger than before, announcing that perhaps she would have her first kiss under the beautiful blue light of the constellations. How romantic would it be, right?

She stood still with her eyelids hiding her pupils without startling when Ahkmenrah gently cupped a hand on her right cheek, it was such a sweet touch, he transmitted so much peace to her from the first moment.

Ahkmen closed the distance between the two more, and more, and more, and more, and more until Tilly's voice was heard as he ran to Laaa through the hall interrupting the moment.

"Laaa, no! Don't touch that! Those aren't headphones! It's a defibrillator!"

Ahkmenrah and Larempteh suddenly opened their eyes and immediately regretted the situation in which they found themselves and laughed without penalty or glory.

Larempteh said with a laugh: "How pitiful."

The queen touched her own face that burned from the strong blush, but she continued to laugh, being accompanied in good humor by the loud and manly laughter of the pharaoh.

That commotion where Tilly chased Laaa, made Rexy and Trixy freak out and make sounds minimally chasing away the crowd causing Larempteh to dodge the alpacas, the flames, the terracotta soldier and the Vikings fleeing in terror in his direction. .

There was a moment when the girl lost her balance due to their action and it was there when she fell into the arms of Ahk, who reflexively held her tight by the waist like the gentleman she is. That caused her to sink her face into the hollow of the precious and soft neck of the king, thus forming an electricity that was made at the clash of skin against skin and at that moment a spark ignited between the two upon closer inspection.

"Well, I must reaffirm it, now more than before, what divine eyes you have."

Ahkmenrah praised the color of the girl's irises that now mutated to the striking honey pigment, giving Larempteh a soft grimace on her lips as she watched him from behind her thick lashes as she smiled tenderly, with her too, of course losing herself in his eyes.

**** End of Flash ****

@sherlollydramoine @xmxisxforxmaybe @txmel @moon-stars-soul @sunkissedmikky

#ahkmenrah #rami malek #night at the museum #natm #natm ahkmenrah #night at the museum 3

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bradfordarchive · 5 years

Text

clicks my fingers to no humanly discernible rhythm as i strut bk onto the dash w chara number two!! (it’s me nai bk again bt this time wearing a stick on moustache). bradley’s pinterest is HERE n u kno the drill mre abt her under the cut n like this fr those Sweet Sweet plots!!

MARGARET QUALLEY / CIS-FEMALE — don’t look now, but is that bradley milligan i see? the 23 year old psychology student is in their junior year and she is a rochester alum. i hear they can be brave, resilient, destructive and ruthless, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet she will make a name for themselves living in off campus. ( nai. 23. gmt. she/her. )

aesthetics: singeing a hole in your fishnets with the cherry of a menthol, spitting a pistachio behind the bar just to hear it ping off the nozzle top bottles, lemon in a fresh cut, a war torn poppy standing alone in an empty field, poking bruises, stomping over flowerbeds when there’s a path right next to it, dangling over ledges just to feel your chest jolt, a snarling rottweiler that should be muzzled, limp feet poking out behind a door, ‘I PROMISE I DON’T BITE’ scrawled on a name tag, slapping a bald head in front of you at the cinema like it’s a bongo, not owning a single jacket that isn’t stolen, driving a stolen car in the wrong lane against the traffic, blowing coke in someone’s face after asking “hey, does this smell funny to you?”, hair more feral than a wolf cub and eyes smudgier than a coal mine.

BACKGROUND:

father runs a gang n strip club in queens called ‘no angels’ tht fronts an affluent drug trade, primarily coke. his name is tony milligan n his gang is p infamous around there fr being jst like…. completely cutthroat n awful. they were nicknamed ‘tony’s rottweilers’ by locals bc he bsically has all of these trained dogs on leash at his command n they’re still a growing organisation tday

he’s pretty much the worst human being alive n bradley hs like….. a lot of issues with herself as a result of years of toxicity n abuse

in terms of more family bkground info her mum’s name was alyssa n she vanished when bradley was 12. jst like…. into thin air. nothing. no note. zilch. gan! n when bradley asked her dad abt it his response was essentially “guess she didn’t love us enough to stay”. as bradley’s got older tho n become (without intention) more involved in the business side of things, it’s become pretty clear there was far more to the story.

they had a horrible marriage n tony ws quite violent at the best of times, which didn’t help the fact tht alyssa ws struggling a lot w severe depression n rly just… not in the mindset to b dealing w anything else on top of tht, even where motherhood ws concerned. bradley p much… would look after her a lot n they’d both b scared of her dad n it was just a whole mess.

anyway im rambling bt basically tony (bradley’s dad) gt wind of alyssa sleeping w men tht worked fr him n he just… got rid. bradley’s kind of worked out over the yrs tht her mum didn’t jst leave on her own accord n tht something must hav happened to her bt she’s too scared of her dad to ever directly accuse him

when her mum went all of her dad’s cruelty pretty mch got channelled straight onto her. it ws diluted between two before bt as u can probably imagine her upbringing was jst…. a steep downhill decline frm tht point onwards

she learnt ways 2 deal w the incurring trauma bt they weren’t healthy ones at all! bsically jst. will do or take anything fr the distraction. chases a thrill like it’s the only way to remind her she’s alive. has absolutely no regard fr her own wellbeing n sometimes gets other ppl in trouble too bc she’s so insatiably reckless

she hd….2 separate stints of psychiatric hospitalisation n she never tlks abt it. like ever. acknowledging she’s been vulnerable is her worst nightmare n bc of the way her dad raised her she always thinks any sign of struggling within herself is weakness. truly does…. not kno how to properly emotion

CUT TO!!!! huntington beach. she’s currently living in a spacious loft above a rly busy bar tht i picture like. p close to campus so a lot of students prob frequent it?? she loves it bc she can sit on the window sill smoking n argue w ppl tht walk past drunk. jst randomly callin out like. nice chest hair Loser. i feel like she hasn’t even paid fr wifi she jst uses the bar’s free one n like. goes in there expecting free drinks all the time?? is jst like erm? i live here? let me drink? this is my house? aka she’s. a lot.

her dad’s opening up a new strip club (also called no angels bc he’s trying to lowkey make it like a chain) n he’s only allowed her to make the move bc she’s overseeing it kind of???? as well as a few guys tht worked fr him back in queens. one in particular called billy hs made the move n he’s a menace so. three cheers fr anarchy!

PERSONALITY:

the kind of sour cherry only certain people have a taste for

once drank a bottle of whiskey, insisted she could still do a cartwheel and accidentally kicked an old man’s front tooth out in the process. proceeded 2 collapse into a flower bed and laugh so much abt it that she cried

barely takes anything seriously 50% of the time and is angry the other 50%

if she was a coffee she’d be black with five grains of sugar that you couldn’t taste until the last sip

high functioning alcoholic. if u ever see her w a coffee cup u jst kno tht one sniff will confirm high alcohol percentage. honestly idk hw she does it her liver must b yellin

loyal to a point of fault. if she cares abt u and u murder a man in cold blood she’ll brawl anyone that says ur guilty

honestly wld probably fight a person over anything. sometimes she’ll jst be having a bad day n she’ll burst n take it out on whoever says the wrong thing. a minefield!

has the worst luck in romance…. ever. the majority of her past bfs hav been absolute beasts n as a result she kind of has the ‘romance is dead n love is a lie’ mentality

speakin of which i feel like she’s bi bt wldnt have dated a girl or anythin. like guys r probably…. her preference just bc historically theyv treated her worse n she hs a very self destructive personality like that. sexy!

dresses like courtney love, 2014 sky ferreira and a character from this is england had a baby. mostly wears stolen clothes from strangers and jackets that swamp her. hair is p much always a wild mess n she usually hd kind of smudgy/smoky makeup bcos apparently she’s allergic to combs and generally looking presentable… relatable content

she’s v sarcastic. sometimes blunt. kind of has a habit of…. assessing a person n she’s quite perceptive bc she’s been trained to b by the way she always has to monitor her dad’s expression fr the slightest emotion change. she’s quite confident n can p much mke a conversation out of whatever. sort of independent too like she hs a bunch of friends bt she doesn’t care abt going out places alone if she’s in a certain mood n jst wants…… to get into chaos. she’s probably kind of known around campus bt itd b a 50/50 balance between bein known as intimidating n bein known as that one girl tht always gets into anarchy

likes: fishnets, stealing cars, throwing watermelons off rooftops and whiskey

dislikes: amy schumer, honesty, yellow tulips and going home

PLOTS:

someone tht got a job at the new strip club her dad opened up in town?? either as a dancer or bartender or whtever. just a forewarning it’s probably gna b a pretty..... seedy and Not That Pleasant environment bc it’s like. a crime hotspot inevitably bc it’s a gang hangout so. ur chara wld truly be in fr a rollercoaster ride to say the least

she deals coke fr her dad’s gang bt it’s more like. a hobby than a steady source of income tht she Needs bc she just likes the thrill of the fact tht encounters in tht line of work can turn sour tbh. a Thrill Seeker! mayb she deals to ur muse??

anyone….. she’s brawled in the past like. she’s literally a menace i cnt express this enough. wil jst randomly throw a drink in someone’s face fr no reason bc she’s bored. she’s probably pissed off 1000 diff ppl in 1000 diff ways. the possibilities r endless n i jst think tht’s a sexy prospect!

fwbs perhaps??? exes??? (probably ws a tumultuous relationship wtever…. ur muse is like like bradley is. a handful)

mayb someone tht she met at an aa meeting when she hd to go fr a court mandated thing one time after bein arrested fr public indecency. i feel like there’s probably a rly expensive statue somewhere thts fancily Sculpted n she like. did a flying kick n kicked the dick of it off n gt arrested fr it

ppl she……. Goes Wild Goes Crazy w. truly jst the most self destructive person alive so anyone w a similar mindset wld b a hellish bt fun combination

on the contrary a gd influence cld b nice perhaps? like someone tht genuinely cares abt her n she jst doesn’t kno hw to compute it

um. honestly the world’s our oyster. hmu n we cn brainstorm if none of tht catches ur eye!

#huntingtonintro #depression tw #abuse tw #drugs tw #alcohol tw #alcoholism tw #hospitalisation tw #disappearance tw #death tw #grief tw #murder tw #self harm tw #addiction tw #so sry there r so many tws bradleys life hs been. An Experience to say the least

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jenosweave · 5 years

Text

college!kun

FINALLY A KUN REQUEST!! this is one of my favorites please enjoy and don’t let me flop!!

let’s start w the basics…

major: linguistics

minor: comparative literature

extracurriculars: book club

other: literally writing his own novel??

school life

kun is such a good student

he always does his work on time and tries to get ahead when he can

he’s a plug too

he'll even do his friends’ readings and summarize it for them if they have a particularly busy week

he doesn’t allow himself to be used though

he just loves and appreciates his friends so much and wants to help them be successful when there are things they cant control that can get in the way of that

kun really enjoys his studies

his required courses are really stimulating and keep him on his toes

he loves leaving class every day feeling like he’s one step closer to understanding where language comes from and why we communicate the way we do

kun’s passion for linguistics sprouted from his adoration of reading

he’s a member of every book he could find on campus

he firmly believes the more you read, the more perspectives you’re able to see, which in turn, makes you a generally more enlightened and compassionate person

kun loves reading and language so much that he decided to just write his own book over the summer for fun

he sent a “very rough draft” to a local publisher

just for experience

and to get him used to rejection in case he ever wants to seriously pursue a career in writing someday

but now he’s fucked because

they actually liked it??? so he kind of has a book deal now??

which he was not expecting at all

there were a lot of comments for him to address as he expected

and the first one he decided to deal with was the lack of a love interest for his protagonist

except there’s only one problem with that

he has no idea how to successfully write for a love interest

so he does what any normal young writer would do to get inspiration

and goes to the university’s monthly speed dating event in the quad

early stages

you had been “too single for too long,” according to your best friend

and the only way you could get them to shut up about it was if you attended one of the school’s speed dating nights

and you decided it was worth the trouble, and made your way to the quad to get this over with

you had exactly two and a half minutes with every person you’d “date”

and for the most part, those two and a half minutes couldn’t go by fast enough

after talking to other students who only cared about football, trucks, and battlestar galactica, you were about ready to up and go

but your second to last “date” changed your mind

his name was kun

“alright this is gonna go by quick, so i’m gonna take the reigns if you don’t mind,” he spoke

he was oddly productive

you nodded

“great!’ he smiled. “any hobbies?”

“well, i love to read an-”

“reading? me too! what genres are you into?”

a wide smile stretched across his smooth face and his pupils dilated noticeably UGH CUTIE

“i mean, i like fantasy, historical fiction, biographies, science fi-”

“no way! me too!” he interrupts. “i just like all books so much!! i’m writing my own actually!”

you thought that was mighty impressive and asked him what his book is about

and he told you he can’t disclose that information because of his publishing deal

and youre like,,,, wA i T.. PUBLISHER?? THAT’S SO COOL!!

and he goes, “thank you! maybe you’d like to come and read it sometime when it’s finished.”

you couldn’t help but blush and turn your head away

and that’s when you noticed you only had ten seconds left on the stopwatch

you hurriedly seized the pen the event organizers had left on the desk and grabbed kun by the wrist, taking him by surprise and causing a slight gasp to escape his lips

you messily scribbled your number onto his forearm

and as soon as you had finished writing your digits, the timer rang

as you both departed from the table, kun shouted at you from a distance “how am i supposed to read this chicken scratch?!”

you shot him a smile playfully and shouted back

“text me!”

you didn’t receive a text that night

or the night after

but the night after that, your phone dinged as soon as you hopped out of the shower

“hey! this is kun from the speed dating thing. i hope this is the right number. i’ve already texted three wrong people and have had to explain myself to each of them. it’s really embarrassing. please confirm if this is you!”

you sent him a simple “:)” in response

“so does that mean you’re down to get a coffee with me tomorrow?”

“:)”

the next morning, you had the first of many, many morning coffee breaks outside the school library

these quick little meetups usually concluded with a quick sift through the library, where you’d each recommend each other your favorite books and read the prologues to each other over a hot cup of coffee

at first, the librarians used to kick you out for having drinks inside, but now youre clever and just hide your cups under your jackets

this became a weekly occurrence

and then it started happening twice a week

and now you basically see kun every other day

he even managed to get you to join the biographical book club with him, something you’d be way too nervous to do before meeting him

kun was such a good guy

you knew he was smart and funny and you knew he was caring and fun to be around

but what you didn’t know is that he had been smitten with you from the second you scribbled your number onto his arm

one day, as you were studying for your last final of the semester, you got a call from kun

you sent him the automated response, “sorry, i cant talk right now”

but he called right back anyway

“what is it?” you answered

“i’m sorry if you’re studying but this is super important and im so excited and i just have to tell someone!”

“what’s up kun?”

“my book! it’s finished! and i finally added in the love interest like the publishers asked!”

“I’M SO PROUD OF YOU BITCH

“finish studying! then we can facetime and i can read you a chapter!”

and so for the next thirty nights (even over your winter break), you and kun would facetime so he could read you a chapter until the book was finished

and you’d give him pointers at the end of each one so he could go back and revise once you had gone to sleep

the plot was incredible, honestly

the protagonist was a divorced middle-aged man whose wife left him for being too aggressive and absent-minded all the time

in the divorce, the wife got full custody of their teenage son

but when she goes on a business trip, the protagonist gets to watch the son

however, when he goes to pick the son up to take him to his house, hes nowhere to be found

so the novel follows this poor guy trying to find his missing son

but no one seems to be listening to him, so hes losing his mind

he’s working alongside the police and falls for the dci leading the investigation

and basically in the end it turns out he’s schizophrenic and his wife and son never existed at all

all of this was in his imagination

and he had just been showing up to the police station every day like a crazy person

kun did so much research for that

he even got the accuracy of his portrayal of a schizophrenic checked by his pal psych major!jungwoo

on the night kun finally finished reading to you

you were sh0000000000000k like what the fuck all that trouble for it all to be fake?? genius kun!!

so he asked for your feedback on the development and personalities of all his characters

you complimented him on how well he portrayed the dci

they weren’t your typical love interest

they were headstrong and witty and educated

and they were determined to help the protagonist find his son when no one else was listening to him

“you like them?” he asked you

“yes! they were so different than i had expe-”

“i was hoping you’d like them. i was inspired by you.”

your heart BURST!!!

“KUN THAT’S SO SWEET!”

and that’s when he explained to you why he went to speed dating to begin with, and told you he was so glad to have met you

because you were the “perfect muse”

and then he asked if you’d like to be his s/o

and of course

you said yes bc duh?? he’s kun??

relationship

kun is the cutest bf ever!!!

nothing has really changed between you two

you still have library and car dates

but now you hold hands sometimes

and when kun is feeling extra bold, he gives you a peck on the cheek

you guys have such a cute and innocent relationship

you can often be seen together on the campus quad where you met for the first time, you in kuns arms, him tickling your stomach to make you giggle

he’s so sweet and is so considerate of your needs

out of all the boys, he’s hands down the one most likely to change for you if you guys hit a rough patch

he always pays for food

which kind of ticks you off because what if one day he goes broke

but all he really cares about is your happiness and satisfaction

and he really just wants you to know that no one loves you quite like he does

and he tells you every day how grateful he is to have you in his life

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red-wardens · 5 years

Text

DA Questions

Tagged by: @goblin-deity and @gothkimmyschmidt -- thank you :)

Tagging: @jaffa-keksi @chillyrose @dickeybbqpit @mocha-writes @the-dread-doggo @heraldofwho @keeperscompanionsdai @space-vashoth (if you guys haven’t done it already. if you have, tag me so i can see!)

–---------

01) Favorite game of the series?

Dragon Age 2. I love the bisexual disaster companions and how they have friends/relationships/lives outside of you. And I love Hawke and their tragic story. I also like having years passing with the same protagonist/companions instead of “my new companions and I had one crazy year together”. Plus fighting mechanics were my favorite in this game.

02) How did you discover Dragon Age?

I saw gifs of Morrigan on tumblr years ago (back when DA2 was still new) and thought, “holy shit, she’s pretty I should play that”, and just never got around to it till a couple years later till when I saw a lot of gifs of default Marian Hawke and thought “she’s gorgeous and funny and I would die for her” (I still can’t believe I used to think I was straight...) and then found out she’s not till the second game so I hurried up and bought Origins to play first. Then got hooked, Origins has such a great story.

03) How many times you’ve played the games?

I’m on my 4th and 5th (playing simultaneously) playthroughs of Origins, I’ve played DA2 either 6 or 7 times. Inquisition I’ve only played once and I skipped most of the side missions because that game is so long.

04) Favorite race to play as?

Elf. I love dwarves a lot though and if they could do magic they’d easily be the fave.

05) Favorite class?

Mage. I like healing and not having to get close to enemies.

06) Do you play through the games differently or do you make the same decisions each time?

I try to play differently each time and role play hard (ex: certain mage OC’s are only allowed to have skills in certain fields of magic even if it’s inconvenient for me, my traumatized-by-Carver’s-death Hawke who is triggered by seeing ogres can only “hold position” when one appears and I can only fight as the companions because she’s having a panic attack). In Origins I like to put someone different on the throne each time, side with mages once and templars the next, and have companions love/hate me according to my OC’s personality (and not cheat by using the Feast Day gifts). In DA2 I have a different personality Hawke each time and they make varying choices but in the end I have never sided with templars. I think in my 2nd Inquisition playthrough I’ll side with templars though out of curiosity.

07) Go-to adventuring group?

Always depends on who is the love interest and who are the closest friends of my protagonist. Even if the team comp is terrible.

08) Which of your characters did you put the most thought into?

Blue Surana was my first character ever so she’s had the longest time of me adding/subtracting/updating her and her story. That being said I like to think I’ve put a lot of thought into my Mahariel and Amell as well. Out of my Hawkes, Claira is the most developed.

09) Favorite romance?

Fenris.

10) Have you read any of the comics/books?

I've read all the comics and I’ve read “The Calling” and “The Last Flight” I plan to read the other books soon hopefully.

11) If you read them, which was your favorite book?

I really recommend The Last Flight if you’re a die hard Grey Wardens fan like me. The main character inspired the name for my Mahariel.

12) Favorite DLCs?

I genuinely forgot Awakening is DLC since it came with my game but, yeah. I love all the companions in Awakening and I wish it were longer. “The Exiled Prince” is also another fave since I genuinely like Sebastian Vael and he’s a kickass squadmate.

13) Things that annoy you.

The white-washing, what happened to Orsino, the way Inquisition doesn’t take into account Hawke could have been a blood mage, no healing as an Inquisition mage, the fucking Requisition Officer, the way you can’t be nicer to Sera, no dwarf romances, and how the Inquisitor can’t call Cullen out on certain things (Cassandra too, honestly, though I love her she can be really insensitive to other cultures). That’s just in the games, don’t even get me started on some of the fandom.

14) Orlais or Ferelden?

Frozen Dog Lovers > Snooty Elf Oppressors, any day

15) Templars or mages?

Mages, no contest.

16) If you have multiple characters, are they in different/parallel universes or in the same one?

I have 3 worldstates that I have playthroughs for, and a Multi-Warden AU

Worldstate 1 - Arcane Warrior/Battlemage/Fire Mage, mutual-pining-for-Sten, grey-sexual Blue Surana + Spirit Healer/Ice Mage, Fenris Romance, gay Akono Hawke

Worldstate 2 - Ranger/Assasin Archer, Zevran Romance, straight Isseya Mahariel + Blood Mage/Earth Mage, Sebastian rivalmance, panromantic/ace Henley Hawke

Worldstate 3 - Blood Mage/Spirit Healer/Entropy Mage, Leliana Romance, bisexual Alyss Amell (dies) + Shadow/Dual-Blade Rogue, Anders Romance, bisexual Claira Hawke

Multi-Warden AU: Blue Surana is main warden and recruits the others after Ostagar forming what I call the “Warden Squad”. Most thought-out world, that I have the most writing for but will probably never get around to writing the actual fic. We will see. Also, I need to make some Inquisitors for all these worldstates....they’re planned out I just need to force myself to actually play them.

17) What did you name your pets? (mabari, summoned animals, mounts, etc)

Mabari’s: Rabbit (Blue Surana), Dog (Isseya Mahariel), Teddy (Alyss Amell), Tor (Akono Hawke), Better Carver “BC” (Henley Hawke), Bear (Claira Hawke). Isseya Mahariel numbers her wolf and bear summons A-# for wolves and B-# for bears.

18) Have you installed any mods?

I play on xbox so nah, sadly.

19) Did your Warden want to become a Grey Warden?

Blue Surana didn’t want to leave the Circle and Isseya Mahariel didn’t want to give up searching for Tamlen so “no” for both of them, but they both were amazing at it. Alyss Amell, as much as it terrified her to leave to fight things, wanted to be free of Kinloch Hold.

20) Hawke’s personality?

Akono is almost exclusively Purple though he has rare Blue moments when speaking to Carver or sometimes Fenris.

Henley is solidly Red except maybe once or twice chose purple banter for talking to her only friend, Varric.

Claira is the most varied in that she’s split 60-40 between Blue and Red, meaning well and wanting to be all good/peaceful, but having a wild, passionate temper when defending mages and her friends/family. I also headcanon she has the foulest mouth of my Hawkes though she actively tries to stop cursing it’s an unbreakable habit. She’s also a shameless flirt and hits that heart button almost every single time it comes up (I wouldn’t consider her Purple at all though since she isn’t sarcastic and is the type to laugh at jokes rather than make her own).

21) Did you make matching armor for your companions in Inquisition?

I made Cole and I matching outfits because I love him ._.

22) If your character(s) could go back in time to change one thing, what would they change?

This could get long if I listed everyone so, Blue Surana regrets not telling Sten how she felt sooner, though she doubts it would have changed anything. Isseya Mahariel wishes Tamlen could have been found sooner so the Joining could have saved him.

23) Do you have any headcanons about your character(s) that go against canon?

My entire Multi-Warden AU is a big “fuck you” to canon because all those potential wardens deserve to live dammit.

24) Who did you leave in the Fade?

In this house we do not leave Hawkes in the Fade. So, sorry Loghain :(

25) Favorite mount?

I legit forgot I had a mount 90% of the time. At least I got to hear more dialogue I guess.

#about me #thanks for the tag!#long post

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coreytaylr · 5 years

Note

do all the cat asks!!!!!!!

1. Name?- Pici and Mocsok

2. Fur color?- Pici is tricolor, Mocsi is tuxedo!!!

3. Any family you know (other than you)?- i dont know what this means tbh??

4. Age?- Pici is 2 yrs old, turning 3 in March and Mocsi is 4 yrs old, turning 5 in May (oh my god he’s so old!!)

5. Favorite toy?- neither of them really give a shit about toys no matter how many we buy them so :(

6. Nicknames?- i call Pici Babey or Picúr, and Mocsok’s nickname is Mocsi (or bastard)

7. Cinnamon roll or problematic fave?- both of them are both kjsdfksdjf like, i think Pici is the sweetest lady that ever existed, while everyone else thinks she’s the spawn of satan; and w Mocsi, its the other way around, i know the shit he’s done, but everyone else thinks he’s an angel

8. Length of fluff?- normal length for both of them i guess??

9. Any funny habits?- oh man ksjddf Pici likes to announce before she goes in the litterbox and does her business and its the funniest thing ksdjfdskf- Mocsi .. is just not the brightest cat to ever lived, so when he wants to go outside, he will stand in front of the door and meow and scratch at it, and if you open it for him, he doesnt go out but just stands there and stares.. and he just won’t move if you dont nudge him

10. How old were they when you met?- we got Mocsi when he was around 4-6 months old, and Pici has been w us since the day she was born (literally akjfsdf her mother was my cat too)

11. What does their food bowl look like?- they have three bowls: one for the dry food, one for Mocsi, which is a little bigger, blue bowl w a cat’s head drawn inside of it; and Pici just has a basic aluminium one

12. Indoor or outdoor cat?- Pici is a strictly indoor cat as of last year’s summer, Mocsi is kind of like a mix? he is allowed to be outside w/o a harness (i know i dont like it either), but he comes in at night

13. Recent picture?

14. Old picture?

(Pici was only a few months old here

15. Cuddly?- YES YES YES

16. Ever changed their name?- yeah actually, Pici started out as Maki (which means monkey, basically) bc her meows sounded like monkey noises??

18. Eye color?- they both have yellow eyes!

19. How do they express love for you?- they purr and come into my lap, or sleep beside me. Pici likes to stand on my laptop blocking the screen. Mocsi likes to headbutt me, almost breaking my nose

20. How do you express love for them?- i pet them and cuddle up to them, pick em up and hold them in my arms - just the usual

21. Any theories on what breed?- nah, nothing they are just typical house cats

22. Do they ever wake you up?- YEAH Mocsi almost suffocated me way back when, by trying to sleep on my face asdhfklsdf

23. How much do they meow?- Mocsi only meows when he wants food or wants to go outside, so not much. on the other hand, Pici is very vocal (and has an attitude too) and i really really like it !!!

24. Any hiding spots?- hm. not really? or maybe under the bed or table

25. Do they enjoy guests?- Mocsi LOVES new people!!!! he will make friends w everyone and anyone. Pici…not so much (same)

26. Lofty objects to sit on?- we have this huge ass wall-to-wall closet in the living room which is p tall, they like to sleep there. otherwise, they just like to sit on tables

27. Wear a collar?- nah not since Mocsi almost suffocated himself w one

28. How much shedding?- Mocsi is alright, but Pici is a disaster

29. Do they enjoy brushing?- no:((

30. Ever drink from the toilet?- no????, but Mocsi does like to sit on it when the lid is closed dont ask

31. How do they get your attention?- by meowing? but i literally always pay attention to them so

32. Embarrassing thing they’ve done?- Mocsi almost suffocating himself w a collar or running headfirst into the wall. Pici’s p graceful so idk

33. Weirdest thing they try to eat?- Mocsi really likes potatoes for some reason?? and Pici always tries to eat my food

34. Are they like your siblings, children, or friends?- THEY ARE MY BABIES

35. What time do they eat breakfast?- after i wake up, so it depends

36. Do you cut their nails?- we only cut Pici’s nails (when we remember it)

37. Do you think they understand you?- i dont think Mocsok knows anything about this world tbh but im like 99% sure Pici understands everything

38. Ever make fun of them?- oh yeah. a lot.

39. Do you take their picture often?- everytime im home

40. Ever hiss at you?- Pici did!! i tried to take away a bird she caught

41. Ever try to scratch or bite you?- yea, but its all fun and games

42. If you try to grab their paw, what do they do?- Mocsok doesnt give a flying fuck, Pici takes it away

44. Canned or dry food?- both

45. Weight?- Mocsi is 6 kgs, Pici is 2 kgs. according to google thats 13 lbs and and 4 lbs respectively

46. Ever got lost?- there were times when i was really worried bc Pici didnt come home in time, but they never got lost, no.

47. Do you buy them presents?- YES. just the other day i saw like, wine for pets?? and i really wanted to buy it but my mother didnt let me ://///

48. Do they respond when you call?- Pici does. im pretty sure Mocsok doesnt know what his name is

49. Do they ever see other cats?- yea. my brother has a cat too, so they usually see him, but who knows how many cats Mocsi sees when he’s outside

50. Declawed?- FUCK NO

51. Funniest expression?

52. Favorite place to be pet?- Pici likes it if you like….rub both sides of her face? and Mocsi likes chin scratches

54. Give them a head kiss.- next time i see them, i will !!!!!

55. What time of the year is most exciting for them?- i think its pretty neutral all throughout the year

56. Are they good at hunting real prey?- Pici was real good at it, she could catch birds mid-fly. Mocsok? nah.. he can barely eat his own food ksajfkdsf

57. Do they ever attack nothing?- attack? no. stare at it until i freak out? yeah

58. What are they doing right now?- idk im not at home :(( but its probably sleepy time

59. How long have you had them?- Mocsok for 3,5 years or so, and Pici, as ive said, has been w me since day 1

60. If you could have them stay as a kitten forever, would you?- i dont think so? i love them just the way they are

63. Have you ever stepped on their paw?- no but i did sit on both of theirs kasjkfsdf

64. Ever tripped you on stairs?- we dont have stairs so no

65. Any ear hair?- yeah!!! both of them have some

66. Favorite view from a window?- Pici just likes to spy the people who are on the street. Mocsi doesnt seem to know how to get to the window no matter how much he tries

67. Describe why they are precious.- i mean this whole post is basically about that kskdsf they are just goofy assholes who like to run around and fight each other. and sit/sleep on tables. and my laptop.

68. Fit the cat stereotype?- Pici definitely does. Mocsok is like a dog in a cat’s body tbh

69. Chaotic neutral?- 100%

70. Do they enjoy following/ keeping you company?- oh dude yes, i cant even shower w/o them scratching at the door

71. Are you their favorite human?- i am definitely Pici’s favorite, but not Mocsi’s :’(((((

72. Do they like tv?- awwwwwwwwwwwwwww Pici used to watch cartoons when she was little, then she started watching like animal planet documentaries about big cats!!! but she lost interest. now she just likes to watch the things i watch on yt (her favorite is jacksepticeye. even if she’s asleep, she will wake up if she hears his intro. she would also like come up to me and meow at jack akjsdkjdsf its so cute)

73. Favorite noise to make?- i mean…purring…hellooo

74. If they were a Neko Atsume cat, what would their momento be?- pass

#holy shit this was fun #i love them so much :((((((((((((((((((((#kriss.txt #ask #neidermeyersmind #long post #neidermeyers-mind #cats

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countrymadefoods · 5 years

Link

Archaeologists granted access to Japan's sacred tombs

“The opaque bureaucracy that runs the affairs of the imperial family - is unlikely to shed new light on the origins of what some believe is the world's oldest monarchy, for Japan's increasingly vocal ultra-right, even this modest concession is a step too far. They subscribe to the ancient myth that holds that Japan's emperors are the direct descendants of the sun goddess Amaterasu Omikami, and that the current monarch is the latest in an unbroken line of 125 emperors stretching back more than 2,600 years to Jimmu in the seventh century BC.”

“Although the wartime emperor, Hirohito, renounced his divine status after Japan's defeat in 1945, ultra-nationalists regard his son, the current emperor, Akihito, as a living god, and have issued death threats to archaeologists involved in previous attempts to gain access to the tombs.Their greatest fear is that proper inspections of the tombs will reveal compelling evidence that the Japanese imperial family originated from China and the Korean peninsula.”

“Akihito alluded to his Korean ancestry on his 68th birthday in 2001. In remarks that were ignored or played down by most of the domestic media, he said: "I for my part, feel a certain kinship with Korea, given the fact that it is recorded in the Chronicles of Japan that the mother of Emperor Kammu was of the line of King Muryong of Paekche."Kammu reigned from 781 to 806 AD while Muryong ruled the Paekche kingdom in Korea from 501 to 523 AD.”

(via Archaeologists granted access to Japan's sacred tombs | The Guardian)

Giru of Paekche

“Giru of Baekje ( 기루왕 ; died 128, r. 77–128) was the third king of Baekje, one of the Three Kingdoms of Korea.”

Muryong of Paekche

“Muryeong of Baekje (462–523, r. 501–23) was the 25th king of Baekje, one of the Three Kingdoms of Korea...According to the Shoku Nihongi, Emperor Kanmu's mother, Takano no Niigasa is a descendant of Prince Junda, son of Muryeong, who died in Japan in 513 (Nihon Shoki Chapter 17).”

Emperor Kanmu

“Emperor Kanmu (桓武天皇 Kanmu-tennō, 735– 9 April 806) was the 50th emperor of Japan, according to the traditional order of succession. Kanmu reigned from 781 to 806... According to the Shoku Nihongi (続日本紀), Yamabe's mother, Yamato no Niigasa (later called Takano no Niigasa), was a 10th generation descendant of Muryeong of Baekje.”

Kanpai! Sake through the ages

“The notable event of that time was the Kenmu Restoration, a doomed attempt by Emperor Go-Daigo in Kyoto, the ancient capital, to wrest real, as opposed to merely ceremonial, power from the Shogunate — the regime of military “eastern barbarians” in Kamakura.”

“Most amazing were the aspects of these men’s parties and meetings! In offering wine, they made no distinction of degree between the high and the low. Likewise, men cast off their caps and loosened their top hair, while monks showed their persons in white undergarments without their gowns. The wine was served by more than 20 maidens of 16 or 17 years, clear-skinned and superior in face and figure, through whose unlined robes of raw silk the snowy skin gleamed fresh as lotus blossoms...The guests sported and danced and recited verses. Yet all the while they took counsel together, how they might strike down the eastern barbarians.”

”‘There came over (to Japan)…a man who knew how to distil liquor,” another eighth-century chronicle, the “Kojiki,” tells us. The man was a Korean, Susukori by name.“So this Susukori distilled some great august liquor, and presented it to the heavenly sovereign” — the Emperor Ojin, roughly datable to the fourth century A.D.

Not much is known of Emperor Ojin (he is vaguely associated with an invasion of Korea), but evidently he knew how to enjoy himself. The “Nihon Shoki” records a subject people known as the Kuzu, mountain folk of the remote Kii Peninsula, coming to Ojin’s court to present “thick sake” and singing, “We have brewed the fine great liquor:/ See how good it is — / Come, partake, down it with joy,/ Our father.”

“The earliest sake was termed kuchikami no sake — literally, “chewing-in-the-mouth sake.” “This sake...was made by chewing rice, chestnuts or millet and then spitting the wad into a large wooden tub where it was allowed to brew for several days...only young virgins were allowed to chew the rice. These virgins were considered mediums of the gods, and the sake they produced was called bijinshu, or ‘beautiful woman sake.’ ” Refinement proceeded slowly, over centuries. Thick sake grew thinner, ultimately turning liquid. Black sake grew white and finally transparent.”

”Sake-brewing was Japan’s first commercial enterprise. Associated both in Heian times and before exclusively with shrine and court, it passed into entrepreneurial hands in the early years of the Kamakura Shogunate (1192-1333). That period is known mainly for inaugurating Japan’s stern military tradition, but it has another claim to fame: Its stable currency fostered a commercial spirit.”

“Descendants of the families that had run the sake brewery of the court...now sought permission from the new government to establish themselves as independent brewers, or formed guilds associating themselves with powerful temples and shrines and going into business under their protection.”

Fortunes were made. Warriors were not supposed to be drinkers, but they proved open to temptation after all. Kyoto culture, despised in the Kamakura Shogunate’s early years as effete, gradually took hold. Battle-hardened samurai became Kyotoized in spite of themselves. By the 14th century...there were 342 sake brewers in Kyoto alone, Kamakura being a prime market.”

“The hostess and maids of the house receive you very hospitably and lead you to a room upstairs...Everything in the room makes you comfortable. A clever-looking maid comes up with a tea-set and serves tea and cakes, then asks you whether you want to take sake and some dishes, hire geisha and jesters...In another room the samisen is heard...Lots of sake and good food produce in the guest an amorous nature.

At the gate of a tea house...stood the funny but inevitable little Japanese girls, gaily bowing and smirking...asking the ‘honorable’ gentlemen to come in and rest and laugh and chaff with them and take just one cup of their ‘honorable’ tea. Tea in a modern Japanese tea house in these days of civilization means, I fear, whisky with or without water...Peach blossoms may surround it (the tea house), but the almond-eyed maidens are employed here to tempt the traveler to drink and romp.”

“For 1,000 years and more, “drinking” in Japan meant, almost exclusively, but not quite, drinking sake. The exception was shōchū...And so in the popular imagination if not quite in actual fact, “drinking” and “sake” were synonymous — until Japan’s mid-19th century opening to the West...What is indisputable is that the “soothing liquor, smiling liquor” celebrated all those misty ages ago by Emperor Ojin has been in sad popular decline ever since, though it’s said very lately to be on the cusp of a revival...businessmen were as likely to be drinking beer, wine or whisky as sake ”

Soju: the most popular booze in the world

“There's a brand of one particular spirit that sells more than twice as much as any other in the world...soju, national hooch of South Korea. Jinro Soju – available at Waitrose and Amazon – has topped Drinks International's annual list of best-selling global spirits for years.

Soju now sells in 80 countries, with a rising profile helped by Korean superstar Psy, who not only proclaimed soju his "best friend" but also lent his dark-glassed visage to various campaigns to get the rest of the world smitten too. K-Pop K-Shot" billboards sprouted across America, showing Psy clutching a bottle of Chamisul soju (available via Beers of Europe).”

“In a country with the world's highest per capita alcohol consumption...soju takes a whopping 97% of the spirits market. But this is a drink embedded in Korean culture since the 14th century, when Mongol invaders taught the locals how to distill, with fermented rice as the traditional starter.”

(via Soju: the most popular booze in the world | The Guardian)

The Story Behind Kirin Beer Labels

“The kirin depicted on Kirin Beer labels is a legendary creature derived from ancient Chinese myths and is said to be a harbinger of good luck...When Kirin Beer first came out in 1888, beers imported to Japan had labels that featured animals such as cats and goats. Japan Brewery Co., Ltd.—the forerunner of Kirin Brewery—chose also to use an animal as the central theme for its beer label.

A close-up of Kirin Beer labels from 1933 to the present day reveals that the three tiny Japanese kana letters for "ki," "ri" and "n" are embedded in the mane of the kirin depicted in these labels. We do not know exactly why this started: Some say the graphic designer who created the original 1933 label may have simply added an amusing touch to the design, while others claim it was an attempt to prevent forgery of the labels.

(via The Story Behind Kirin Beer Labels | Kirin)

Kiringul

“Kiringul (Korean: 기린굴; "Kirin's Grotto") is a cave in North Korea said to have been the home of the kirin, a mythological chimeric beast that was reputedly ridden by King Dongmyeong of Goguryeo in the 1st century BC...kirin (or qilin), a mythological chimera-like beast with "the body of a deer, the tail of a cow, hooves and a mane", as well as a single horn on its head. The creature was said to have been King Dongmyeong's favourite means of transport. The place in question is called Kiringul or "Kirin's Grotto". Despite the name, it was not literally supposed to have been a place where kirins lived, but was instead a mythical name akin to the Giant's Causeway in Northern Ireland.”

Coin from Kirin Province, Manchuria (1901)

Jilin

“Jilin (吉林; 기린; formerly romanised as Kirin)...The name "Jilin" – which literally translates to "Auspicious Forest" – originates from girin ula ᡤᡳᡵᡳᠨ ᡠᠯᠠ, a Manchu phrase meaning "along the river". This would have been transcribed into jilin wula (t 吉林烏拉, s 吉林乌拉) in Chinese, then shortened to "Jilin."

Anti-Manchuism

“In 1911 Xinhai revolutionaries proclaimed that Han and Muslims were equal, but deliberately left out the Manchus in the original proclamation, and thus "can be seen as sanctioning" the massacre of Manchus in Xi'an.[1] The Muslims, led by Ma Anliang and Ma Qi proceeded to ignore the proclamation, and continued to fight for Qing against the revolutionaries. After the Manchu men in Xi'an were all killed, the Chinese Muslims rescued attractive Manchu girls and converted them into Muslims.”

How Beijing Turned Koreans Into Chinese

“Of the approximately two million Chinese Koreans living in China, about half reside in Jilin Province, one of the country’s three northeastern provinces...Given such a strong Korean influence on the region, it may seem logical that of Jilin’s ethnic Korean population many (if not most) would identify with one or both of the Koreas...to the youngest generation. For them, the contemporary connection with South Korea is little more than functional, while that with North Korea barely exists at all.

Having grown up in the era of China’s rise, at a time when the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) has shown very little practical interest in the preservation of ethnic minority cultures and devoted a great deal of attention to forging some kind of “unified” Chinese identity, today’s youth of Yanbian identify as resolutely Chinese.”

“The government was in no mood to let a surfeit of independent spirit get in the way of the country’s trajectory, and this — coupled with the disintegration of the Soviet Union — necessitated a recalibration of national policy toward ethnic minority education. The impact was readily felt. In 1990 there were 1,106 Korean elementary schools in the Yanbian autonomous region, but this was down to just 138 by 1999 and 31 another decade after that...The same pattern has been repeated — and amplified — elsewhere in Jilin. In 1991, 26 Korean middle schools were in Liuhe County, an administrative district of the industrial city of Tonghua in the west of the province, but by 2011 there remained only one.”

“The reasons for the dominance of Chinese-language education among Chinese Korean youth, a local university professor informed us during our recent visit to the region, are twofold: First, sustained economic growth and development has altered perceptions of the Chinese state and what it means to be Chinese today. While political challenges to the CCP’s right to rule exist, economic opportunity for those who more fully assimilate, reinforced by a sense of pride in being Chinese, means more people (parents prominent among them) are willing to buy in. And second, in part a response to the challenges facing the Party today, the CCP has changed its nation-building strategy. Whereas in the past it was possible to be Chinese and ethnically Korean, today one is expected to be thoroughly Chinese.

Taken together, this provides a powerful explanation for not only the decline of Korean-language education and Korean ethnic consciousness, but also the success of Chinese nation-building.”

(via How Beijing Turned Koreans Into Chinese | The Diplomat)

Ethnic Koreans in China not bound to N.Korea

“China quite possibly fears that some Korean government might one day lay claim to the area that encompasses the Yanbian Autonomous Region (YAR.) Recall that there have always been Koreans there, and the area is now home to an estimated 2 million ethnic Koreans. China has no wish to see an increased sense of nationalism among them. This is a major reason why China does not want defectors from North Korea that might ignite any latent feelings of irredentism and nationalism in the ethnic population of its northeast provinces.

The younger ethnic Koreans in the YAR are undoubtedly aware of the differences between the two countries, and they can easily see that their future is brighter in China than it would be in North Korea...The point here isn’t that ethnic Koreans in China would likely prefer to remain as Chinese citizens in China rather than return to the chaos of North Korea. Ethnic Koreans do indeed know that North Korea is a failed state, that they have far more freedom in China and that they enjoy a better standard of living in the YAR than the average citizen in North Korea.”

”Many ethnic Koreans in the YAR, in the event of a collapsing North Korea, would likely see excellent opportunities – the real draw being South Korea with its bustling cities, readily available consumer goods of high quality, astonishing personal freedoms – and ways to make money. To be sure, those former “exiles” and their descendants certainly realize that their homeland culture has transformed radically since they were last in Korea.

Nonetheless, culture and heritage are important in Asia and that, along with the shared historical ancestry, could exert a powerful pull, particularly if older generation ethnic Koreans consider returning to the peninsula. If nothing else, ethnic Koreans with their intimate knowledge of China would likely see great opportunities in which they can play significant roles as South Korea grows its trade with its larger neighbor.”

(via Ethnic Koreans in China not bound to N.Korea | NK News)

Ethnic cleansing makes a comeback — in China

“Since last year, hundreds of thousands — and perhaps millions — of innocent Uighurs and other ethnic minorities in the Xinjiang region in northwest China have been unjustly arrested and imprisoned in what the Chinese government calls “political re-education camps.” Thousands have disappeared. There are credible reports of torture and death among the prisoners. The government says it is fighting “terrorism” and “religious extremism.” Uighurs say they are resisting a campaign to crush religious and cultural freedom in China. The international community has largely reacted with silence.

Horrific as they are, the camps constitute just one part of Beijing’s effort. The government has destroyed thousands of religious buildings. It has banned long beards and many Muslim names. People are forced to eat pork against their beliefs. The Chinese government’s persecution of innocents continues even after their death. Crematoria are being built to literally extinguish the Uighur funeral tradition, which insists on burials.”

“Add to that the unprecedented security and surveillance state in Xinjiang, which includes all-encompassing monitoring based on identity cards, checkpoints, facial recognition and the collection of DNA from millions of individuals. The authorities feed all this data into an artificial-intelligence machine that rates people’s loyalty to the Communist Party in order to control every aspect of their lives.”

If that doesn’t bother you, consider that this draconian expansion of Chinese repression is being exported to the United States and around the world. Families of U.S. citizens who speak out against Beijing are targeted as part of Beijing’s effort to snuff out all international criticism.”

“Despite Beijing’s efforts, mounting evidence of the camps has managed to make its way to the outside world. Massive camp construction can be seen from satellites, and advertisements for new construction contracts are publicly available. Witnesses have told their stories. Yet the world has failed to respond...The Chinese government is attempting to “Sinocise religion” and “transform religion and ethnicity in Chinese society” in a scheme more ambitious than Mao’s Cultural Revolution...“The scope of this campaign is breathtaking.”

“The Chinese government’s obsession with its international reputation is its main vulnerability. Calling out these atrocities in public and to Beijing directly is key. The horror in Xinjiang is not a China issue, it’s a global issue. China uses its position on the U.N. Human Rights Council and the U.N. Security Council not only to stifle discussion of its actions but also to attempt to rewrite international human rights norms to allow expansion of these practices by any dictatorship with the means.”

(via Ethnic cleansing makes a comeback — in China | The Washington Post)

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athenawroughtarchive · 7 years

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drabble for @mcallisterclan bc megan always writes prtty things for me. 2k wrds.

Everything is always so cold. Winter seeps through marble encasing and faux wood floors like tar pervading a lung - which is warm, a constant beat to it. The sheets are cold when she wakes up, and the thermostat is set to seventy three. She’s from Massachusetts, and though D.C. is significantly warmer, she finds herself having to adapt to the new environment.

The floor is cold when as her soles press against it; legs thrown over the bed, blindly seeking out her shoes strewn somewhere near the foot of the fourposter. It’s Phillip’s old bed, and like everything about him, it’s modern and stiff and unfriendly. She’s decided she hates it, and she’s put pink pillows everywhere, and yellow throw blankets and throw pillows are tossed all around the house, and they’re never folded. She wants him to get angry about it. She waits for it, watches him press his lips together in the same way someone would repress a laugh – except he would never laugh – before dissapearing into his office after work.

Dejection is cold. But he is colder.

There is something in the way the house sits that she knows he’s left on another business trip, the way the unwalked floor creaks when she pads into the kitchen.

A part of her wishes his ‘business trips’ were pleasure trips, and an even larger part of her wishes he was cheating on her. A sick, twisted part of her wishes she’d find a lipstick stain on his collar so they’d have something to ruin and something to rebuild. But there’s nothing there. And like a house that sits on a hill, their home is empty, and nothing stirs within it except for her spoon in a coffee mug. Fingers play chords against the granite countertop, and dressed scantily in one of her husband’s button downs he’d left in his old room, she pulls her knees up to her chest and sighs.

She watches with a ghost of a smile and the Boston globe in her hand as Machiavelli scampers into the living room, as though he’s been spooked. He runs on his chubby legs like there’s a broom waiting to sweep him into a corner, and she can’t help but laugh, eyes creasing and the newpaper crinkling.

Laying the paper flat against the island counter, she turns in her stool and nearly doubes over when her eyes land on Phillip’s figure in the doorway. He’s unmistakable - lofty, dressed in black slacks and a dark button down. She presses a hand against her chest and for a moment she thinks those rumours, those blind colleagues of his that seem to fear him, could be on to something. “Sacre bleu,” she sighs, catching her breath on the tilt of her throat.

She knows she looks a mess. Her hair sticks in every direction, despite being tamed in a low chignon, and mascara seeps from her waterline. But somehow whatever reflection plays in his exquisite eyes is livable. And then she remembers she’s barely dressed, her legs jutting from a shirt that isn’t even her own - one that hardly leaves her bodice to the imagination. Blushing fiercely, she waits for him to clear the air.

“Run out of clothes?”

“What?” Her voice is breathless and rushed.

His brows raise, and he gestures to the button down hung limply from her shoulders.

“Oh, no. Sorry.” A feverish scarlet runs up her neck. “You left it and – I’m sorry. I thought you were gone–– going?”

He pockets his keys. “No.”

“Where were you?”

“I wasn’t aware I was under interrogation. I had a meeting at the courthouse.” She looks up at him with her doe-eyed gaze and wonders, briefly, if there’s anything he lies to her about. “Is there a problem, Ambrosia?”

“No, no problem. Just curious.” She takes her coffee cup, the swift movement nearly allowing the hot brown liquid to lunge over the rim of the mug, and bids him aidue. “I’ll leave you to it.” She doesn’t check to see if he’s agknowledged her before making for the hallway.

“Ambrosia?”

Pulling the shirt over her ass, she turns back to Phillip, “yes?”

“I never liked the shirt anyway,” he said after a moment. “Keep it.”

January rolls around. A newscaster says the temperature would drop to the thirties by midnight.

The holidays came and went and the McAllisters churned in the New Year with a bottle of champagne. They toasted to health, just the two of them – which was so like him, really, because it was so traditional, so tasteless, that it almost pained her to lift her glass to something as insipid as health.

She’s unreasonably angry and for many, many reasons.

One - he never kissed her on New Year’s. It was the perfect setting: his mother’s house, the clock struck twelve, and as luck would have it she was pretty sure John kept mistletoes up yearlong and they happened to be standing under one. She stared up at him, their hips brushed, and she bit her lip. Her heart capsized in on itself when he smiled down at her and kissed her forehead. Rosie gave a half-hearted cheer, and blew into one of the kid’s harmonicas.

She was humiliated.

She cried in the bathroom as Mariah Carey caused the walls to tremble over the speakers - why were they still fucking listening to Christmas music? - and Barbara put on another classic holiday movie she says the boys used to love to watch when they all got along. So she kisses someone else, and finds out that guilt tastes a lot like copper.

And she decides that his colleagues were right. Phillip was terrifying when he was angered.

She counts the days. They don’t talk for nearly a week. His fists are still balled and there’s a vein which flickers in his neck when he sees her now. The silence is deafening, the distance between them earsplitting, as the first week of the new year rolls by. In like a lion, out with a lamb. They eat at different times, wake in lonely beds.

There’s an event that they have to attend, on the ninth. She’s accustomed to these sorts of things - being the daughter of Matthew Reynolds has conditioned her well – and by proxy Phillip has become something of a regular to them, too.

But she’s also used to living in an apartment with her closest girl friends. So when she reaches around to clasp her bra which had tangled itself with the back of her dress – one with a hefty price tag at that – she finds herself at a loss, sighs, and realises there’s only one person that could possibly avail her.

“Phillip?” Her voice rings throughout the still house.

There’s a moment of shuffling, before his voice sounds back at her, “office.”

She follows his voice into his workroom and nudges him to gain his attention. “Please? It’s stuck.”

A moment passes in between her plea and his silent nod. His hands reach out, and momentarily his palm presses against the small of her back. Such is the berth in size that he can nearly still her with one hand. His skin is warm against her - hers is almost always cold.

He moves onward, and with deft fingertips draws the icy zipper across her freckled back and clasps her dress in place. She sighs in relief, pulling the sleeve up and over her shoulder.

“Thank you. Do I––”

“You look beautiful.”

A shy grin crosses her lips. “You, too.”

The house oddly smells like him. She thinks its funny, because he’s sly and deceptive and he’s good at his job (she knows because she rifles through his things) - he never leaves a trace, never any indication of his whereabouts.

She sometimes wonders if he really lives with her - she’s a hurricane and he’s neat and organized and never leaves the seat up or his shaving cream on the counter, while her hair clips and barettes and makeup are all over the place. She thinks its John’s doing, or his military upbringing. But the more she thinks about how utterly faultless he is, the more he serves to annoy her.

Though she’s washed it twice, the laundry smells like him. Minty, pervaded with cinnamon, spice, citrus. She brings the cottony shirt to her nose and holds the warm fabric to her chest. He’s been gone a week and everything still smells like him. She wonders if –––

His birthday is on the fourteenth. He’s thirty-four, and it’s the first time either of them have had a birthday since tying the knot. She wants it to be special. So she, perhaps blindly, consults with Matthew and even her own brother before settling on initialed cufflinks and a home brewing system - which supposedly revolutionized beer drinking, according to Matthew. She had considered a watch, of course, but that was somewhat cliche and she figured she’d try again on their anniversary.

Anniversaries were intended for the cliche.

She’s affluter with nerves, toying with her fingertips as she waits for him to get home. She wants him to like it. She desperately wants his approval.

He gets home at six - and like clockwork, her heartbeat rings in her ears when he breezes through the door, discards his glasses from the bridge of his nose, and pulls off the helmet from his head, his hair still looking impeccably suave.

“Phillip.” She greets, a twinge of expectation to her voice. She walks towards him and reaches for his hand, tugging him into the living room. “Come, come.”

Her poor husband is dubious. Did he think she had forgotten? “What’s this?”

She sits him down at the head of the table, and she, with her legs crossed and knees red, sits next to him. “This is your first birthday we’ve spent together. I wanted to do something for you. I wasn’t sure what you wanted, or what you needed, but I hope you’ll like it. It’s a last minute thing and I’m sorry but its not like you’re the easiest person to––”

“Ambrosia.” The pad of his thumb pressed against her bottom lip, he smiles gently towards her. “I’m sure it’s fantastic.”

“Open it,” she urges, a broad smile washing her face with unreserved joy. She fails to recall the last time she had been so raputous.

Like any well-trained, eldest brother, he is gracious and pretends to like the gifts she’s selected for him and thanks her profusely. She, through the largest smile she’s ever worn, tells him not to mention it. “So do you like it?”

“My wife has great taste,” he says.

She reaches for his hand again and squeezes it. “Happy birthday, Phillip.”

“Ambrosia?”

She leans her elbow against the table, nodding quickly. He tucks a stray lock of hair behind her ear, gently cupping her face with one hand.

“My birthday’s on the fifteenth, sweetheart.”

They go out one night - the sky is irritated with stars and it is no longer quite so cold, nor is the loneliness quite so unbearable. She supposes she has learned to adapt.

Phillip was scheduled to meet with an investor and his wife that same night, but his partner took a rain check last minute and the reservation still stood, so she tagged along instead, and wore a low cut, inky dress, so he could take her to a niche location on the Potomac river, which feeds into the mouth of the Chesapeake bay with the sound of a crooning guitar and encompassing atmosphere of over effusive Austrian cuisine.

He laughs for her. Something she said caused him to truly laugh, and though the noise is drained by a sip of wine, her eyes are glimmering with mirth. It is a blessed, blessed sound, honeyed and finely tuned.

She laughs when she tucks into bed, rolls over onto the cold, empty expanse of linen and mattress, lets her fingertips furl up the cool sheets. She’s so glad.

Whatever sophomoric feelings she had for Phillip last Christmas were gone.

She could move forward.

#i hope!! i did him justice #i don't think i've ever written a drabble w my partners char lol #also its 3 am leaf me alone #╰ ᴘʜɪʟɪᴘ & ᴀᴍʙ / mcallisterclan ╮ ᴛʜᴇ sᴜɴ ᴡɪʟʟ ʀɪsᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴛʀʏ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ.#mcallisterclan

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