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pathologicalreid · 7 months

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the space between us | S.R.

previously

The adjustment between never being home and always being home seems to take a toll on you.

who? spencer reid x fem!retired!reader category: flangst content warnings: the events of stuck between a rock and a hard place apply, briefly mentions a baby, reader trying to cope with a 180-turn in life, anxiety word count: 2.16k a/n: i meant for this to be fluff and it's definitely a tad angsty. good thing i'm obsessed with spencer and retired!reader. they'll be back.

Slowly but surely, you convinced yourself that the dark green walls of the apartment were closing in on you. Sitting up in bed, you looked at the time on your phone before quickly scrolling through the notifications, half expecting a text from Andi Swann asking you to come in.

She wouldn’t do that though, because she’s not your Unit Chief anymore, and you no longer work for the FBI.

The only text message you saw that piqued your interest was from your husband, letting you know that he was flying home.

Tossing your blanket off of your legs, you swung your legs over the edge of the bed and stood up. Hissing at the feeling of the cold hardwood floors beneath your bare feet, you wrapped your arms around yourself and made way for the kitchen. Creeping slowly on your way, you made sure to keep your footsteps light.

Gingerly, you flipped the light on, wincing as the fluorescence flooded your vision. As your eyes adjusted, you reached up to the cabinet, grabbed a cup, and set it on the counter.

“You’re sneaking around again,” a voice said from behind you.

Jumping, you put a hand over your chest and spun around, “You scared the shit out of me.” You frowned at Spencer, “I thought you were flying home. I just got your text.”

He nodded, walking into the warm light of the kitchen, “I texted you four hours ago that I was flying home from Connecticut.” His hair was messy, and he had already taken his contacts out, telling you that he had been in the bathroom – he had passed by you while you were sleeping.

Your lips tightened to form a small “o”. Leaning back against the counter, you crossed your arms in front of your chest, “How was Hartford?”

Intently, you watched Spencer as he pushed his glasses up on his nose. “It was fine, the UnSub’s in custody, we’ll build the rest of the case from Quantico.” His tone was strictly no-nonsense when he repeated himself, “You’re sneaking around again.”

Letting your arms fall to your sides, you shrugged helplessly. “I don’t do it consciously, you know?” You told him, reaching behind your back to hoist yourself up so you’re sat on the kitchen counter, legs dangling in the air.

“I know,” he said gently, stepping forward so that he was standing directly in front of you. You parted your knees so that he could stand flush with the counter, allowing for minimal space between the two of you. “The fact that you’re doing it subconsciously makes me wonder if there’s a part of you that feels like you need to be quiet in the apartment,” he murmured, reaching up and tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

You pursed your lips for a moment, thinking about an answer before you responded, “It’s late, I don’t want to bother anyone by walking too loudly.”

Based on the look in his eyes, you can tell that he doesn’t believe you, “It’s an old building, the floors are thick and well insulated. Also, the apartment below us is vacant, and you know that.” His words are borderline accusatory, and rightfully so. “Do you feel safe here?”

Surprised, your eyes flittered up to meet his, “Yes,” you answered almost instantaneously.

“Do you not feel at home here?” He asked, further pressing his agenda.

When you and Spencer decided to move in together, you were living in a studio apartment, so his place just felt like the obvious choice. At the time, you weren’t home long enough to make it home, and now it seemed like you were past the point of no return. “Can we go to bed?” You asked softly.

Spencer tenderly placed his hands on either side of your waist, “You’re deflecting. What’s so wrong that you don’t feel like you can talk to me, baby?” You should’ve known better than to answer a question with a question.

Averting your eyes, you looked up at the ceiling in hopes that the action would quell the tears that were filling your waterline. “I just feel so out of place,” you answered, emotion closing your throat.

“In the apartment?” He whispered softly.

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, you shook your head. Giving up on your dreams of stopping your tears, you bowed your head and let them fall. “In my life,” you clarified. “I thought it would be easy to just go from being an undercover agent to being at home. Maybe that was a lost cause, but I didn’t think it’d be so hard.”

Never wavering, Spencer stayed resilient with you as the dam broke, letting you lean your head on his shoulder and rubbing soothing circles on your back as you cried. “You’re going through one hell of an adjustment period right now.”

Nodding tearfully, you pressed the heels of your hands into your eyes, “I feel like I haven’t been a real person in almost ten years. I don’t know who I am without that fucking job and it’s mauling me.” Briefly, Spencer stepped away from you, filling the cup that you had gotten out with water and handing it to you. “God, I’m a disaster. I’m so sorry,” you muttered, looking down at the glass of water you’d clasped in both hands.

“You are not a disaster,” he insisted. “You’re going through an unfathomable experience and you’re not giving yourself enough leeway,” he stressed, hooking a finger beneath your chin, and lifting your head.

Everything about him seemed soft, and you felt like pieces of broken glass – flying around and damaging everything in sight. You lifted the glass in your shaky hands, bringing the lip of the cup to your own and downing half of its contents.

Spencer studied your facial expression before he spoke again, “I know exactly who you are. You are the single most selfless person I have ever met,” he told you earnestly. “You spent nine years of your life rescuing tens of thousands of people, giving up holidays and birthdays and time with loved ones for the benefit of total strangers.”

Sniffling, you shook your head, “Spence,”

“No, this is true, and I need you to listen to me,” he urged. “One time, you had gotten back from five weeks undercover and, before catching up on sleep, you went to Henry’s birthday party. Solely because you had missed it the year before.” Hesitating for a moment, he resumed singing your praises, “You’re brilliant and funny and beautiful, but I need you to stop being so magnanimous.”

You pulled back, furrowing your brows in innate confusion, “What?”

He nodded, affirming his point. “I need you to be selfish. Operate with your self-interest in mind. Use that to discover yourself. If you keep throwing pieces of yourself away in order to make the people around you happy, then you’ll never really identify your adult self.”

“I don’t know where to start,” you confessed. You were always working; the FBI was your life. “Everyone is telling me to do different things,” you murmured. Spencer wanted you to be selfish, your mother wanted you to have a baby, and every single one of your friends had offered their stress relief methods – most of them unsolicited.

The understanding in his expression made your chest ache, “I think you should talk to someone. Not me, not Garcia, definitely not your mom, but a professional. You should talk your experiences out with someone who can help you work through it, not just like you do with me. I know you hold back details when it’s with me.”

Uncertain, you tried to wrap your arms around yourself again, but Spencer didn’t let you close yourself off. “Okay,” you ventured, “I’ll look into it.”

Putting his hands up, he smiled softly at you, “That’s all I ask.” He stepped back, allowing you to get off of the counter and stand. Spencer gently ushered you into the living room, sitting down next to you on the couch.

Instinctively, you leaned into his warmth as he draped an arm over your shoulders. “I need a hobby. Something to do other than sit at home all day,” you thought aloud.

“We can look for ideas in the morning,” Spencer offered. “Maybe we can go to the store this weekend for supplies.”

Turning your head to face him, you pressed your lips into a thin white line, “Hey, Spence?”

He hummed, “Yes, love?”

“We could get a house,” you proposed. “It could be a good new start for the both of us, and we have the money,” the more you spoke about it, the more you liked the idea. A new start for the new you. Technically, the two of you were still newlyweds, it felt like something you were supposed to do. “We wouldn’t have to keep your books on the floor anymore,” you murmured, absentmindedly drawing shapes on his t-shirt with your index finger.

Your eyes flickered up to see him smiling. “We absolutely can get a house, and you won’t have to tip-toe,” he said pointedly, “it’ll be our space.”

Mirroring his smile, you adjusted slightly on the couch, “Our house.”

As you tucked your feet underneath yourself, you felt his eyes on you, “Are you sleeping alright?”

Groaning, you wiped a hand down your face, “You worry too much. We were doing so well.”

“Did you know that your coping mechanism is avoidance?” He remarked, a hint of teasing in his voice.

You rolled your eyes, “I sleep fine,” you answered simply. It was true, once you were asleep, you slept perfectly fine until the morning. It was falling asleep that you had a hard time with, lying awake and wondering if when you finally fell asleep you would be greeted by nightmares. Nightmares that you had been waiting weeks for but had yet to come. “Let’s uh… let’s call it a problem for the professional,” you faltered.

He nodded understandingly, “You just let me know if there’s anything you need, okay? Anything at all.”

Allowing your body to meld into his, you hummed, “How are you doing with all of this?”

“I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night, just to make sure you’re still breathing,” he confessed. Adjusting his glasses, he pulled you a little closer to him. “I’ve seen you more in the past six weeks than I had the previous year, and, selfishly, I’m glad that we get more time together.”

With one hand, you reached up and cupped his cheek with your palm, “I am too, love. It’s new, even though we’ve been together for years, I think we’re lucky to have something that feels new.”

He turned his head to press a kiss to the center of your palm before taking your hand in his, “I think I’m lucky to have you.”

“Sweet talker,” you teased lightly.

You nudged him gently when he went quiet. “I love having you be at home when I get home,” he whispered as if it was a secret. “I suppose I never really thought much of it because it always seemed like an unattainable fantasy.”

But now you were home when he came home. He took time off to spend with you right after you had gotten out of the hospital, but for the past six weeks, every time he walked in the door, you were around. It was almost like the two of you had entered your honeymoon phase. Although, you supposed you had, “Did anyone ask you about the party?”

Spencer chuckled, “Of course they did.”

Part of you supposed it was your penance for getting married in secret – mostly secret, everyone always seemed to forget that Rossi was there – that the BAU was insistent on giving the two of you a wedding. “I never knew profilers had such great memories,” you pondered. “No one else asks me about it.”

“They just want to make sure you’re alright before turning it into a celebration,” he explained. “For the BAU, taking a step back is a big deal,” he leaned his head to the side so that his chin was resting on the top of your head, “you know that, though.”

Nodding softly, you shut your eyes, “I don’t suppose they’d be willing to do a combo housewarming and wedding celebration.”

“Not a chance,” Spencer answered almost a bit too quickly.

You sighed in mock defeat, “We’ll just have to have a party a weekend until Garcia runs out of ideas.”

Slowly, you felt yourself falling asleep again, “Do you want to go to bed?” Spencer murmured.

There was just a moment before you hummed, “In a minute.” You pulled on the sleeves of your sweatshirt so they would cover your hands, “Hey, Spence?”

“Hm?” He said, drowsiness growing in his voice.

You tipped your head back and looked up at him, “I love being home when you get home, too.”

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#criminal minds #spencer reid #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #written by margot #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff #criminal minds angst #criminal minds fluff #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds fic #dr spencer reid #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds hurt/comfort #spencer reid hurt/comfort #spencer x retired!reader

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sweetpascal · 2 months

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𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 — 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐢𝐱

pairing: perv!stepdad!joel x fem!reader

summary: only one more day remains in the week before your mom returns home. your feelings for joel have deepened, and he's aware of it; it's evident to him. he's tempted to maintain his distance, yet he can't deny that you've become the most captivating presence in his life.

warnings: MINORS DNI. DUB-CON. NON-CON. big age gap [18/52], pussy inspection, fingering, forced squirting, pussy pronouns, joel "just the tip" miller turns into joel "i'll make it fit" miller, TW: light vaginal bleeding, belly bulging, reader is considered petite in height and body type, two (2) pussy spanks, missionaryyyy, choking, finger sucking, dacryphilia, joel is a dirty nasty old man okay, he's a meanie, phone sex (again, joel is REALLY fucking nasty), dirty nicknames (daddy's whore, daddy's bitch), this is all in joel's pov

wc: 7.6k

notes: this series literally would have been HALTED for a while if it weren't for @taeslarityy helping me with brainstorming and constructing how i should continue this chapter. cause pookies, i was stumped. i had no motivation for this series--until yasi and her lovely fucking brain gave me a kick in the ass and got me back up again 🥹🛐 also, i'm genuinely so disappointed in this chapter. it's been such a long wait and halfway through writing, i've deleted it so many times. and even now, i'm so unhappy with the outcome cause i feel like i just rushed through it and forced myself to finish it :(( but hey, one more chapter left. 🩷

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As Joel wakes up in the morning, he senses immediately that something is amiss. He sits up with a hoarse grunt, feeling his lower back muscles pinch and pull. Rubbing his eyes to clear the blurriness, he notices an absence of warmth. The night before, he recalls carrying you to the bedroom, the very one he has shared with your mom for years. He remembers laying down, letting your trembling body curl into his, and gently hushing you to sleep. Now, he's greeted by the cold, empty space in the bed where you slept, mocking him with its emptiness.

In an instant, a surge of panic and fury overwhelmed him, fueled by the thought that you had left without telling him again. The doors unlocked, his car taken, driven wherever your little heart desires. The house's silence confirmed his suspicions of your departure. However, as he swung his legs off the bed, he halted, spotting the small figure curled up on the floor, mere feet from where he lay.

Joel's breath catches in his throat as he approaches, seeing your small form turned away from him. The gentle rise and fall of your shoulders assure him you're still breathing, alleviating his fear that something terrible had occurred. Yet, he can't help but wonder what prompted you to shift away from him to the ground while he was asleep. Were you scared of him? Did you witness or overhear the incident with your friend? Joel kneels down and places a tender hand on your shoulder.

"Baby?" he whispers, careful not to startle you. "Come on, honey, time to wake up." He gives your shoulder a firmer shake, chuckling softly as you respond with a sleepy murmur.

As you begin to wake up, the only sensations are the ache in your neck from the awkward position and an intense coldness. You chose to leave Joel's warmth after coming to the realization that you didn't deserve the comfort and coziness of sharing a bed with him. Joel had taught you not comfort and warmth, but pleasure and pain. You didn't want to start the day being a bad girl for him.

"The hell you doin' on the floor, baby?" Joel couldn't help but laugh when you spring up, nearly cracking your head against his chin. "Hey, hey, easy." The sternness in his voice had you calming down.

A moment of silence enveloped you, allowing full consciousness to take hold. With a soft whimper, you nestled closer to Joel, your nose comfortably tucking in just beneath his jawline, feeling the steady rhythm of his pulse against your skin. He pulls you onto his lap and leans back against the bed, comfortably stretching out his legs to hold you closer to his chest.

"You want to tell me why you were on the floor?" he asks quietly, lips brushing against the shell of your ear as you squirm in his hold, desperate to feel some of his warmth.

Joel feels you shrug under his hands. "I dunno," you say so softly that he has to strain his good ear to hear you properly. "I didn't want you to wake up and see me next to you. And... I didn't want to be a bad girl by staying in your bed. I-I think on the floor is better for me."

Joel is caught off guard by the response; it's not what he anticipated. He thought you would be fearful of him and would seek to keep a distance, yet remain within reach. As you look up at him, a slight widening of his eyes occurs, your lashes fluttering and the innocent smile on your lips hinting that if heart-shaped pupils were real, they'd appear in your eyes every time you looked at Joel. He doubts how much longer he can ignore this feeling before it inevitably consumes him. It's gnawing at his insides, twisting and pulling with force. It's a familiar sinking sensation, one he's experienced too often. But now, as you gaze at him with a doe-eyed look on your innocent face, Joel realizes he's in too deep. He's got you hooked, which was his intention, but now you're too hooked. He's searching for an escape. He needs a way out. The voice in his head is screaming, growing louder, louder, LOUDER.

Get out, Joel. Get out. Get the fuck out. Run. Don't get too close. Don't let her fall too deep. Run. Run. Run. Make it hurt. Ruin in. Ruin her. Make her hurt. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out.

"Daddy?"

The sound of a soft voice causes his eyes to fly open, not recalling the moment they had closed. The voice fades away, leaving silence behind. He senses your presence; your skin, your weight, your gentle breath against his neck. You are all he perceives. Yet, this incites anger within him. The sensation is overpowering, his skin grows warm as the walls seem to draw nearer. Joel's breath quickens. Disregarding the concern on your face, he chooses to shut his eyes once more, withdrawing his hands from you to form tight fists.

"Daddy?"

Once more, it's your voice, yet softer and fainter. Joel's jaw tightens, and he grinds his teeth while your voice sears through his ear canal, coiling throughout his brain and delving deeper into the membrane. He tries to steady his breathing, but flashes of your body, bruised and battered, eyes fearful with tears, pussy leaking all over his cock show up behind his closed eyes like a slideshow, and it's as though he was suddenly injected with a drug directly into his veins. His breath steadies and his hands relax. Joel's eyes open to a half-lidded gaze, emotionless as he stares back. He understands the necessary actions; it's for the best. He won't let himself become entangled in any feelings you may harbor towards him.

That's not who he is, nor who he will ever become.

It has been exactly sixteen hours, thirty-two minutes, and forty-eight seconds since the last time Joel has kissed your lips. His body is aching to feel their plush softness and subtle sweetness. To feel them wrapped around his thick cock, tightening all around and swallowing down his cum. To feel them pressed into his neck as you struggle to keep in your little whimpers of sinned pleasure as you fall apart on his fingers. Joel can feel the monster within him, howling and screeching to be released.

He can't.

He won't.

Joel confronts the intricate desires he diligently avoided. Their abrupt emergence, without a moment for him to brace himself, leaves him feeling disarrayed and distant from the man he strived to become. The facade he maintained for years has dissipated. Gone is Joel Miller; the husband, stepfather, boss, and big brother. Now, there was Joel Miller; pervert, predator, stepfather that creeps on his wife's daughter, violator. All the things he has desperately tried to hide away, he now became.

The haunting is relentless, day after day. Living in the same house as the person who evokes such darkness is excruciating. He feels akin to a caged animal, circling endlessly, biding time for an opening to pounce on any unsuspecting individual. Joel is convinced that the only escape from this torment is to confront it head-on. He knows. He also knows it's sick and disgusting, but it excites him unlike anything else. He enables it.

Joel watches from afar, conscious of the negative impact his behavior has had on you today. He notices your fidgeting and the way you quiet down when his glare falls upon you. Your averted gaze and pouted lips communicate all he needs to understand. This experience is as torturous for you as it is for him. Nonetheless, the voice persists, refusing to be silenced. This withdrawal seems to only fuel its anger, making it more aggressive and deafening. It's pushing Joel to the brink of madness.

You had to have known what you're doing to him. Joel firmly believes that you're being a fucking tease on purpose, wearing your soft sleep shorts and paper-thin camisole tank top. When you bend down, Joel could see how your shorts tighten around the shape of your ass and pussy lips, giving him a tasteful view of camel toe, and if he looks any closer, he could possibly see a wet spot on the fabric. He knows what you're doing, whether you know it yourself or not. It's like your body calls out to him, begging to be defiled, begging to be touched by his perverted hands. Whether you know it or not, you need him as much as he needs you.

The house is enveloped in silence. Joel has not uttered a single word for several hours. The quiet has persisted from morning until late afternoon. Nursing a beer, he attempts to divert his mind and avoid being overwhelmed by thoughts of you, his stepdaughter. The task was proven to be the most difficult he's ever had to endure considering the fact that you took a seat beside Joel on the couch and now, you won't stop fucking moving.

It would be a minute of stillness. Then, you would huff and shuffle in your seat, bare thighs brushing against Joel's jean-clad thigh. It was clockwork. Every time he tilted his head back to take a gulp of his beer, your movements jostled his side. With each sip, he grunted and nudged you roughly with his elbow, trying to push you away, yet you edged closer after each shove.

"Enough," Joel grunts for the umpteenth time, opting to use his hand this time to shove you away, albeit harder than the rest. "Sit your ass over there and give me some fuckin' space."

He notices your trembling lips and the tears brimming in your eyes. With a deep sigh, he pinches the bridge of his nose. All he desired was to savor a beer in the afternoon without your tears for every mistake he made, yet he realizes it was a situation he brought upon himself. Evidently, he has managed to reduce you to a state of dependency. Now, it was time to break you down even further until you can no longer cry, only accept your fate.

"Alright," he sighs once more, taking a sip of his beer before turning to you. "What's goin' on? Hm? Why is so goddamn important that you have to be glued at side?" Joel didn't intend to come off as harsh, but his nerves were ablaze, everything was humming, his clothes felt constricting, and the thought of your mother lingered in his mind, an unsettling presence.

He notices you curled up, knees drawn to your chest and arms encircling them. Resting your chin on your knees, you cast him a nervous glance. Joel lifts his eyebrows and gestures with his hand, urging you to speak. He understands that your attachment to him isn't your doing; it's precisely what he desired. Yet, he can't deny the thrill he gets from your reliance on him. Knowing that he's the one you yearn for fills him with a smug satisfaction, inflating his ego immensely.

A young, pretty little thing like yourself eager to please a dirty old man like him.

Clearing your throat in the softest way possible, you tell him, "I've been getting that feeling again... down there. And it won't go away no matter how many times I try to think about something else. I need your help to make it go away, Daddy. Please, help me." The last sentence comes out as a whisper, almost like a secret you're trying to keep for yourself, but Joel heard every word.

Looking at you right now, his sleezy eyes swallow every inch. His fingers twitch on his lap as his hand tightens around the neck of the beer bottle. There's a warmth stirring in his gut. His jaw tensed and clenches as he tries to fight off the sexually violent images of you in his mind.

With the way you're staring at him, Joel knows what has to be done.

That's where he has you now, laid out on his and your mom's shared bed, bare naked and trembling, silky thighs spread wide open with your hands under the crook of your knees to keep them that way. Joel is kneeling between them, clad in only his jeans, his shirt long gone. He's staring down at you like a feral wolf waiting for the perfect moment to attack the pathetic bunny cowering in a tree stump. His mouth waters as he thinks about sinking his teeth into your flesh and drinking your sweet blood. His hands tremble as they start to stroke along your inner thigh, savoring the way you tremble under his fingertips.

"She's just drooling for me, ain't she?" Though the question was rhetorical, you still nod. Joel grins and lets out a deep chuckle before biting down on his bottom lip as his thumbs get closer to your sweet pussy.

He knows he's teasing at this point. The little flutters your pussy gives him tells him all that he needs to know. He only wonders how far he'd have to go for you to finally crack and lose composure. A pearly drop of slick slowly pools out of your hole and slides down to your other tight-ringed hole. Joel catches it with his thumb and gently swipes it up to your clit before pulling his thumb away, a string of arousal connecting from the fingertip to your clit. He sees you glancing down at it as he shows it off to you with a sadistic grin on his face.

"You see that?" he whispers, his plush lips parting as he continues swiping through your slick, subtle wet noises colliding with the sounds of your heavy breathing. "So messy down here, honey girl."

Joel's dick thickens underneath the two layers he wears on his bottom half. The throbbing is constant, his heavy balls pulsing in time with his heartbeat. He's surprised the button of his jeans hasn't popped open. With one hand, he unbuttons and slides down the zipper agonizingly slow. Your eyes are on his hands the entire time. Joel lets out a quiet laugh when his hardness forces the zipper to slide down the rest of the way on its own.

With his cock comfortably breathing, both hands are now back on your inner thighs, thumbs still close to the lips of your pussy. With gentle movements, he uses his thumbs to spread apart your lips to get a better look of your sopping hole. Pearly strings connecting from one lip to the other, your pretty labia spreading open like a blooming flower, your swollen clit throbbing for attention. Joel is in awe and falls into a hypnotized state the more he stares at your fully exposed pussy. His fingers are curious as they stroke along your lips, further dampening the light dusting of hair that keeps your mound warm and protected.

Joel eagerly listens to every little noise you make. His movements are torturous, and he knows he's being mean by not giving you what you asked for. The little trembles of your thighs and your weak moans when his fingers purposely avoid your aching clit. His lips part and he can feel drool at the corners. Licking it away, Joel continues to trace your pussy lips with his thumbs, further observing the clenching and unclenching of your non-stop dripping hole.

"Fuck," he hissed under his breath, fingers catching the slick repeatedly to avoid it wasting onto the bedsheets. In a louder voice, he says in a smug tone, "She jus' won't stop leakin' everywhere."

Joel's mind is reeling the more he inspects your dripping pussy. He can practically taste you on his tongue. A husky, low growl escapes from his chest before he could stop it. He can hear that voice again, feel those claws sinking into his shoulders from behind. The rattling of the cage gets louder and more violent. Joel's eyes shut as fast as his hands left your body as he tries to shut out that dark voice coaxing him to do more damage. He lets out another low growl and shakes his head to himself.

"Daddy?" he hears your sweet whimper fill his ears. "Make it go away."

Joel wants to make it go away. He wants to make everything go away. He needs to or else this feeling won't stop. It'll only get stronger and stronger the more time passes. He knows what has to be done. Then, silence. He opens his eyes, his breathing heavy and labored. The two of you make eye contact, and Joel feels like his heart is about to burst through his chest from how hard and fast it's beating.

Without another word, his middle finger slowly sinks inside your pussy, your tightness sucking him deeper. There's a steady trembling in your thighs as you fight to shut them. Joel's thumb strokes your swollen clit in firm, tight circles. He crooks his finger and lays his free hand across your mound and applies pressure, pinning you between his palm and the mattress.

"What..."

He knows what you're about to ask, but he doesn't let the question slip from your lips before he's fucking his middle finger in and out of your pussy while simultaneously curling his finger against your spongy pleasure spot, all the while pressing down above your mound and rubbing your clit. The wet sloshing of your wetness being spread all around his finger, palm, and your thighs is an embarrassing noise that has you covering your face. For some reason, that pisses Joel off.

"Look at me!" He practically yells and yanks his finger out of your pussy to land a hearty smack directly over your clit. The loud smack has you yelping and squeezing your thighs together as you yanked your hands away from your face to look at Joel with a pained expression.

He shoves your thighs open with brutal force and shoves his middle and ring fingers inside your pussy this time, the tightness increasing from the sudden intrusion. You let out a louder yelp and reach down to grab his arm with both hands, but Joel slaps them away like he would an annoying mosquito. He moves his hand with vigor, fucking his fingers up against that one spot that makes you leak and shake. There's an abundance of wetness that splatters all over your inner thighs and on Joel's palm. His tongue tingles to clean up your sticky mess.

"Goddamn, you're so fuckin' wet, babydoll," he groans filthily, forcing himself to look between your legs. His calloused fingers are shoved so deep inside your pussy, the same ones that have been inside your mother numerous times. Joel is a disgusting man for the satisfaction he feels, knowing that these are the same fingers that have made your mom cum. And now, he's going to make you, his stepdaughter, cum on them in the same way.

Joel presses down onto your pelvis as he keeps the heel of his palm against your clit to apply delicious pressure. He moves his hand up and down rather than forward and back. He can feel his fingers stabbing at the ribbed spongy spot repeatedly, the wet sloshing growing louder the faster he does it. Your moans are garbled and stuttering from his unrelenting pace.

"That's it, babydoll," he grunts quietly, biting down on his bottom lips as he fights to slide in a third finger. If he's going to open up that pussy any further, it's going to be around his cock.

"Stop, stop, stop," you squealed and kicked your legs, trying desperately to pull your body away from his fingers. "I have to pee!"

Joel goes harder and faster, his palm practically slapping against your clit in time with his fingers. The final moan you let out was demonic, of some sort. It didn't sound like it was coming out of a teenage girl, but more from a deranged older woman. Then, a stream of wetness splashes out and splatters all across Joel's forearm and onto the bed sheets. It was fucking never-ending. Your pussy keeps sucking in his fingers, fluttering all around his knuckles. He pulls his fingers out and lands another smack onto your pussy, paying extra attention to your needy clit.

He knows what he has to do. He knows what has to be done.

He rests heavily on top of your body, one forearm planted on the bed beside your head as the other moves between your bodies to lower his jeans and his boxers, not quite shaking them completely off. You're still trying to catch your breath, not exactly understanding what it was that just happened, what it was that you just felt, and why it felt so good. Joel can see it in your eyes, the unspoken questions on the tip of your tongue. He hushes you softly, his lips just a hair away from yours.

"Daddy's goin' to do the tip again, okay? Just the tip, babydoll, I promise," his voice is quiet and soft, his breath tickling your lips like a kiss from the wind.

He doesn't care enough to hear your response or to see if you want to do this or not, but he's already pressing his tip against your sticky hole and pushing inside. Joel's hoarse grunt was muffled as he buried his face into the crook of your neck, his big, heavy body sagging further onto yours. His hips slowly move forward and forward and back, fucking his mushroomed tip in and out of your eager hole.

"Oh, my God," your sweet little whimpers whispered in his ear as Joel's hips continued their steady pace. "Too...much." Your voice is clouded with a tinge of pain as he fucks an inch deeper, and then two inches deeper. "Daddy... Daddy, s-slow down!"

Joel's mental state is clouded with depraved lust, pleasure, and ecstasy. His cock sinks deeper. His vision is cloudy, and your voice sounds far away as your pussy sucks him in. He finds himself shutting you up by slapping a big hand over your mouth and pressing some of his weight down onto it. Joel's head lifts up, and he's inches from your face. Your eyes are wide and filled with tears, one hand grabbing onto his shoulder as the other desperately grabs onto his forearm.

"You can take some more," he breathes heavily, his beer-laced breath causing your eyes to flutter shut as you fight to pull away from his face, but Joel clamps his hand down tighter against your mouth, pinning your head down onto his pillow and constricting your movements.

The figurative crate in the recesses of his mind is rattling violently, the voice inside escalating, almost yelling for Joel to let go and inflict pain. This is the necessary action. It's a now or never situation. His skin turns scorching, almost too hot to touch. Every sense is inundated by your presence. Time has run out. The voice is reverberating in Joel's mind, fully taking control.

The chains are gone. The beast has awoken. He is free.

A small scream against Joel's palm has him breaking free from the darkness that has taken over. He's sure he looks feral right now. The widening of your eyes showcases terror. Joel glances down and notices that his cock is now halfway inside your pussy. He doesn't remember sliding his hips deeper into yours. He feels how tight you've gotten, your pussy almost begging for him to not go any further.

"Look at that," he mumbles to himself, pulling his cock two inches out and seeing the tiniest smear of blood around the thick base. "Seems like this little pussy can't all of me, huh?" Joel leans back down, laughing right in your face as he pushes his cock back inside. You're kicking at the back of his thighs with the heels of your feet now, trying to shake your head at him, but he tightens his hand once again. "Don't worry, honey girl," he grunts breathlessly. "Daddy will make it fit."

And with that, Joel reels his hips back and slams the last few inches into your pussy, hearing with glee as your breath gets caught in your throat and your eyes cross and roll into the back of your head. The rhythmic push and pull of your cunt tightening around his cock had his heavy balls throbbing as heat builds stronger in the pit of his stomach.

Joel groans huskily, lowering his heavy body onto your own and slowly moving his hips forward and back, pulling out shallowly and pressing in deep. He makes sure you feel every single inch.

"Feel how deep I am in your tummy, babydoll?" he breathes heavily, his tongue thick in his mouth as his throat suddenly feels dry. Joel can feel his senses slipping as he loses control. He's been waiting for this day for months, and now that he finally has it, he doesn't want to let it go. This whole power dynamic went straight to his head, further inflating his already massive ego. Feeling your virgin cunt being deflowered around his cock was unlike anything he's ever felt.

Your eyes are blurry with thick tears that roll down your cheeks and slide along Joel's fingers. He pulls out again, slowly pushes back in, and repeats the process until the light smearing of blood disappears. He gruffly hushes you and pulls his hand away to shove two thick fingers into your mouth.

"Attagirl," he mumbles to himself as he obscenely pushes down on your tongue to widen your mouth. "Show me what that tongue can do." He slides his fingers forward and back along the pink muscle, mimicking the motions of his hips. He goes as far as to shove his fingers towards your uvula to make you gag. Drool slides down the corners of your lips as strings of spit crudely connect from your tongue to Joel's fingers.

He grins wolfishly. Oh, this is going to be fun. To have you under his body, cunt squeezing and choking his cock, knowing that you will forever live with the moment of your disgusting stepdad taking your virginity. Joel doesn't give a flying fuck on how this is going to affect any future relationships you might have with another man. Right here, right now, you belong to Joel. You know it, he knows it. Within the walls of the bedroom he shares with your mom, you belong to him whether you liked it or not. He's going to take, take, take, and there's nothing you can do about it.

Joel lifts the bottom of his shirt to watch the hypnotizing sight of your swollen pussy repeatedly sucking him in. Virgin blood was now replaced with that sticky slick he grew to love over the last few days. The sopping wet sounds of his hips smacking into yours, your stickiness covering his thick, dark pubic hair and happy trail. Joel looks up to watch your face as he starts to really fuck you. With one hand still trapped between your lips, he uses those fingers to hook behind your bottom teeth and force your head down as his other hand cups the back of your head to grab your hair in a fist. Yanking your head down, you're forced to watch his girthy cock violate your pussy for the first time.

"You fuckin' see that?" Joel pants heavily, his own lips parted to let out a few strained grunts. "See how your little pussy sucks me right in? You see that shit, right?" He sounds too cocky for his own good, but he has every right to be. Your mom was never wet enough or tight enough for him. Having her daughter nearly drowning his dick and choking the life out of it was an accomplishment he'll proudly wear like a medal of honor.

"Daddy," you called out to him, but a garbled, drooly mess came out from his fingers still hooked behind your bottom teeth. "Aaahhgghh!!" The next moan was practically punched out of you once Joel started to put some weight into his next few thrusts.

"Thaaaat's it," he has the audacity to laugh at the sudden reaction he pulled from your trembling body. "She's feelin' it now, ain't she?"

More tears spilled down your cheeks, and Joel's depraved sense of self forced him to swipe his spit covered fingers across the wetness to shove back into your mouth, forcing you to taste your tears on your tongue. The tiny moan you tried to hide wasn't ignored. Joel knows you want to let loose and enjoy what he's giving you, but he remembers what's going to happen if you enjoy it too. He can at least make it hurt just for a little, right?

Pulling his hands completely away from your head and face, Joel places them into the crook of your knees to force them to your chest, further spreading you open and giving him more room to work with. Joel doesn't bother to double check if the positioning is comfortable before he's driving his hips so fast and deep against yours, not even giving you time to breathe between each violent thrust. His head tilts back, his grin widening as he hears your pained yelps, feeling your hand desperately grabbing onto his forearms and scratching your nails down his skin, no doubt leaving deep marks.

"This is what a man's dick feels like," he grunts ferociously like a wild beast. "Quit your fuckin' whining and take this dick. Fuckin' take it. Take it. Take it." Joel's fucking you like a madman now, balls so heavy and filled with cum, smacking against your lightly bruised ass cheeks. Your wetness is splattering all over his jeans and your inner thighs. He glances at your face and sees the expression you wear--eyes rolled back and mouth open to let out ungodly noises.

Fuck, you're really enjoying this. No matter what Joel does, you're going to like whatever he does either way. He's tainted you. He deflowered you and rotted you inside and out. You're no longer that sweet, innocent girl he helped his wife raise. No longer did you have that girl-next-door personality. You were his little experiment, his naive toy to play with when he got bored of your mom and needed something new and young. He's in too deep, literally and figuratively. Your dripping wet pussy tightening around his girth has Joel coming back down to reality.

"Jo-oel! Ohmygodohmygodohmygod!!" Your little squeals were music to his ears. The noises his cock was forcing out of you were ones you tried to keep hidden, but the pleasure was too intense to keep quiet about. "Right there!! Ri-ight... there!!"

Then, a shrill ringtone fills the room. Joel's back pocket is vibrating, and his hips freeze as if he were being held in a stickup. With his cock still so very deep inside, he glances down and sees a visible bulge in your stomach. He can faintly map out the shape of his mushroomed tip. He pulls out and pushes in again, completely hypnotized with the sight of your belly bulging from his massive cock. You seem transfixed on it as well, your own lips parted in wonder and eyes wide in awe. The phone rings again. Joel hisses a curse under his breath and reaches into his back pocket.

"It's your mom," he gruffly tells you and leans in close to point a finger in your face. "Not a single sound, you hear me?" His heart is pounding as if he ran a marathon. He's nervous, there's no lie there. Thankfully it's not a face call, but still. Joel can't shake the feeling away as he swipes his thumb to answer the call.

"I called you twice. Why didn't you answer the first time?"

Joel rolls his eyes immediately and tries to steady his breathing. Of course, no hi, hello, nothing. She had to go straight into getting on his case about not answering fast enough. His patience was wearing thin. He had half a mind to lay his cards out on the table and tell her he was too busy fucking her daughter to care.

"I was takin' care of a little problem I was havin', honey." Joel lets out a strained moan when your pussy clenches around him accidentally. He shoots you daggers, his glare burning into your skin as you hastily cover your mouth with both hands when he retaliates by shoving his dick so deep into you, it causes the stomach bulge to return.

"Oh, yeah? Well, what if I was dealing with the same problem?"

Her voice dropped into a sultry tone, and Joel's eyes rolled once again before he glanced down between your bodies. He uses his free hand to splay across your mound to rest his thumb against your swollen clit. He traces faint circles around the pearl, relishing the twitch in your thighs and your labored breathing.

"Yeah? You wanna do it together while I still have time?" Joel's hips start fucking into you again, slow and deep, just how you like it. He almost sounds bored when he talks to your mom, but his eyes are wild and filled with want as he stares at your wanton expressions.

"I miss your dick, Joely. Ugh. I need it."

Her moans turned Joel off, especially with that stupid fucking nickname she always called him. The sound of your shaky breathing and warm, wet, tight cunt soaking him brought him back to the present. He can block out your mom's voice and focus on what he's providing you. With one hand keeping the phone pressed to his ear, his other hand bats your hands away from your mouth and instead possessively holds onto your throat as he starts fucking you with rhythm.

"You jus' like this dick too much, don't you? Can't fuckin' live without it," he's making eye contact with you as he talks to your mom. He makes sure that you know he's talking directly to you. With his big hand firmly holding onto your throat, he can feel your skin becoming warmer as the eye contact causes you to fluster.

You nod as best as you can, his hand tightening around your throat to cut off any sounds you were about to make within a few seconds. The steady thwack of his hips against yours could be mistaken for his fist around his own cock to your mom. Joel makes sure to not sound suspicious in the way he's talking. Though he's speaking more to you, he doesn't want to use any of the words reserved for you to be used on your mom. Having her figure out what's been going for the week that she's been gone is not what Joel needs right now. What he needs is to fuck you stupid, doesn't matter if your mom is cockblocking him in the process.

"That's right, honey," he mumbles into the receiver, but loud enough for you to still catch on to his slurred words. He tosses you a wink, pressing his fingers deeper into your throat as he fucks you faster. "Takin' this fuckin' dick so good, huh? Only thing you're good for is takin' this fuckin' dick." He growls the last two words, your moans garbled and incoherent and strained from the pressure around your throat.

Joel takes the hint to release your throat and allow you to get a few gulps of air once he realized you were on the verge of passing out. He shoves his middle and ring fingers into your mouth, forcing you to lick along his gold wedding band. Joel puts the phone on speaker and lays it beside your head on the pillow. He puts a finger to his lips and carefully maneuvers your legs onto his shoulders. There's really nothing like half-assed phone sex with his unassuming wife while he fucks her teenage daughter on the other line.

How stupid of both of them, being hassled by the same man for entirely different reasons. Joel is a disgusting, sick man. But God, if it doesn't make his dick rock hard right now. He knows he can't be stopped, and that's the fun part of all of this. No matter how hard anybody tries, Joel is going to keep doing this over, and over, and over again.

"I can't wait for you to fuck me again, baby. Ugh! I need it."

Joel looks deep into your eyes as he grinds nice and slow into your leaking cunt, your swollen clit crushed against his pubic hair with his balls pressed firmly between your ass cheeks. In a husky voice, all while maintaining eye contact, he tells your mom into the phone, "I'll fuck you nice and good, honey. I'll fuck you so good, I'll ruin every other man for you."

And with that, he gives you a kiss that was all tongue, teeth, and spit, all the while your mom's exaggerated moans were ignored. She's talking, but neither of you are paying attention. Joel is so focused on devouring your entire mouth with his that he doesn't register your mom calling his name until you're frantically tapping his arm to get his attention back onto the phone.

"I said, do you miss my pussy, Joely?"

"You know I do, honey," he answers almost robotically as he refocuses his attention back on kissing you sloppily. He pulls away from a brief moment to roll his hips deep into yours, swallowing down your squeaky moans with his lips. Your mom is talking again, but Joel doesn't bother to respond. Instead, he lifts himself onto his hands and starts fucking you vigorously.

Hips smacking into hips and wet, sloppy noises fill the room. You're trying your hardest to contain your moans and not cum so suddenly, Joel can see and feel that. He's grunting heavily, his entire lower half smeared and covered in your sticky slick. For such a virgin, you sure do get wetter than the local neighborhood whore that Joel has numerously encountered many years back. There's a saying that goes: Virgin pussy is the best pussy, any man will agree. And Joel stands by that statement as he feels it from his own stepdaughter. It's an ego boost to feel something so warm and tight get so incredibly wet for him, and only him.

"Fuuuuuck, I can hear how wet this pussy is for me," Joel says loud enough for your mom to hear, though he directs it towards you. The pinch of your eyebrows and the rolling back of your eyes tells him more than what you can say aloud.

"Fuck, Joely, I'm gonna cum!"

Joel is fucking into you harder than you can comprehend what's happening. He smacks a hand over your mouth to muffle your little punched out moans. He grunts and growls like an animal, sweat trickling down his spine, further staining his shirt. His heart races at the speed of a cheetah. He feels like the most powerful man as he watches you start to fall apart under him.

"Cum for me," he breathes out, the warmth in his gut getting stronger as he rubs your clit with a shaky thumb. "Fuckin' cum all over my dick like a good fuckin' whore, huh? Are you Daddy's whore? Tell me... aagghhh!!... Tell me you're Daddy's fuckin' bitch."

"Uuhhh, Joel?"

He reaches over to hang up and toss his phone onto the floor with a clatter before leaning completely onto your body, folding you into a pretzel and fucking you with violence. You let out a piercing wail as he fucks the air out of you. Your nails pinch his skin, no doubt drawing blood. Joel's grunting in your face, warming your already heated skin with his beer breath. Tears roll down your temples as you hold onto him for dear life.

"I-I... hhnnggh..." You can hardly speak, let alone open your eyes to tell him exactly what you want to say. "Daddy... I-I... I lo-ove you!"

Joel is taken aback, letting out a surprised moan when your cunt rhythmically contracts around his cock as you cum, and you keep cumming. It doesn't fucking stop. Your pussy is so wound tight around him that Joel couldn't pull out if he wanted to. Squeaky little moans and shaky cries, you hold onto him tighter as your pussy relaxes.

His cock still lodged inside your swollen cunt, Joel observes you in silence. Your words are still echoing in his ears. His cock is nearly soft as it rests comfortably within your ribbed, fleshy walls. Love. Love. Love. You love him. You love him. And it has to be in the same way girlfriends love their boyfriends and wives love their husbands, which isn't the relationship the two of you have.

Joel pulls out before he realizes what exactly he's doing. He hastily tucks himself back into his ruined boxers and zips up his equally ruined jeans. He tossed you your clothes without giving you a single glance.

"Clean yourself up and get dressed. We need to talk," he gruffly says and leaves the room, slamming the door behind him for a dramatic effect.

He paces in the hallway, both hands running through his hair frantically as he tries to figure out what the fuck just happened. That dark, evil voice in the back of his mind returns. It's creeping in slowly, and soon, it overcomes him, drowning him in its darkness.

Look at what you did, Joel. Look at what happened. Love is involved, the one thing you were afraid of happening. Make it hurt. Cause more pain. Do something, NOW.

He's sitting on the couch by the time you come down the stairs, a subtle limp in your step from the rough fucking he gave you just minutes prior. Your clothes are disheveled, and your shirt is on backwards. You're twiddling your fingers and looking down at the ground like a guilty kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar. Joel's elbows are pressed into his knees with his hands cupped over his mouth in thought. His mind is racing, his thoughts screaming and hollering. For the first time in a long time, he doesn't know what to do.

"Daddy?"

Your gentle voice fills his ears, and he has to force himself to shut his eyes to avoid looking in your direction. He feels the warmth of your presence sitting beside him on the couch. Fuck, he can even smell the thick scent of your pussy, and he wonders if you even cleaned yourself up like he done told you to do. There's a tick in his jaw the more silent he stays. He feels like the first word he utters is going to make him explode.

"Joel?" you whisper meekly, tenderly grabbing onto his tense bicep and flinching when he suddenly jumps up to his feet.

Joel's arm burns from your touch. He doesn't know what to do with himself. He paces back and forth like a tweaker at a gas station, itching to get their hands on some drugs or alcohol. Joel knows that he's royally fucked. He never meant for you to get feelings for him. He thought he was doing the opposite with the way he's been acting with you.

"You stupid fuckin' girl," he barks out a cruel laugh and wipes a hand down his mouth as he shoots around to stare at you with a new fire in his furious eyes. "You don't know what love is, you hear me? You do not know what love is and you sure as hell ain't goin' to get it from me."

He can see his words shoot at you like bullets. The sag in your shoulders and the crestfallen expression you wear on your face was a clear indicator that what he said truly hurt you.

"Excuse me?" your question comes out soft and broken. "You... You don't love me?"

Make it hurt. Ruin it. MAKE IT HURT, JOEL.

"No, I don't," he speaks lowly. "You're real fuckin' dumb to think otherwise, sweetheart. You think all the things I've done to you were from a place of love? Huh? What, you think I really cared about those little feelings you had? News flash, you're just a kid. I ain't your boyfriend, and I sure as hell ain't gonna be a husband for you. I mean, you really think another man will want you after I've already had my fun with your body, hm?"

Joel knew it was a low blow, but he needed to go in for the kill. The way you're looking at him drastically changed into a look of pure hatred and venom. Hot tears spill down your cheeks as he watches you take in his harsh wordss

"I hate you," you wept quietly. "I-I hate you, Joel Miller. You... You bad, bad man."

He leans over with his hands planted on his knees as he slouches to your height. He gives you a mocking pout. "No, sweetheart, you don't hate me. If you hated me, you wouldn't have let me slide my dick inside that pussy of yours and take what was meant to be for a boy your age. Ain't that the truth, hm? No, instead, you let your ol' stepdaddy work his way into your empty little head and make you think that you're really worth somethin'."

He can see in that moment your heart breaking. He stands up straight again, looking down at you with disdain and shakes his head, tsking as he does so. You don't bother to look at him as he fixes your hair over your shoulder. He smiles a little at the flinch you give. When he roughly grabs your jaw in his hand and yanks your head up to look at him, he leans in real close again.

"I still own this pussy whether you like it or not."

And with that, Joel Miller has completely ruined your heart.

taglist:

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#joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x fem!reader #joel miller x you #dark!joel miller #dark!joel x reader #dark!joel miller x fem!reader #dark!joel miller fanfic #stepdad!joel miller #stepdad!joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfic #joel miller the last of us #joel miller tlou #dark!joel miller fic

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lurochar · 19 days

Text

Bad Habit

So I recently read somewhere that Alastor pulls out his hair as a stress reliever? Not sure if it's actually canon, but I thought it was interesting, so here we are!

---------------------------------------

You feel bad, guilty.

Horrible even.

It is why you are currently sitting on Alastor’s bed, waiting for him to come back from wherever he had disappeared into the shadows.

It was okay, Alastor had given you permission to come into his room and the magic that served as his room's lock allowed your presence inside, despite how uncomfortable you felt being in the room regardless.

It hadn't been the first time you had turned down his offers of protection, companionship, and whatever else you desired. If you wanted, he would grant it to you.

Was that worth your soul?

You were scared, terrified even though Alastor assured you again, again, and again that he would never abuse your soul and it would be his greatest treasure. Hell, he had even written a contract of rules on himself pertaining what he could and couldn't do to your soul.

And tired of being frightened by this overwhelming strange one-sided courtship, you fled.

You weren't sure why Alastor allowed you to flee to begin with, perhaps he was giving you space to sort out your thoughts, but you had unconsciously glanced back towards him when you did run.

You had never seen such an expression like that on Alastor’s face before.

You couldn’t get that expression out of your mind and so, only a few hours later, you found yourself in the last place you wanted to be: Alastor’s bedroom.

Still, you couldn't describe that expression.

Irritation, anger, vexedness, longing, agitation, hunger, stress?

It floored you that Alastor could even feel so many of those emotions considering you knew his background. It stunned you even further he felt them for you since you believed he was interested in you because you were the only female deer demon – the only doe – in his territory.

Was Alastor interested in you beyond your demonic characteristics?

You jump when the shadows in the room flicker around and Alastor materializes, clearly taken back by your presence as he takes a step backwards when his red eyes land on you.

You stand from the bed, ready to apologize. “Alastor, I'm sorry about tod–” You pause, eyes widening when you notice something. “Y-your hair…!”

A large chunk of his hair is missing. It looks as though it's been torn out.

“Did you get into a fight?!” You quickly move towards him to get a better look, vaguely noting Alastor’s smile is tight and he almost resembles a trapped animal with his tense posture. “Are you hurt anywhere else, Alastor?”

Alastor stares down at your sweet concerned face and almost lets a sigh escape him. “I am fine, my dear Doe.” He resists the urge to bristle defensively when you try to get closer to where his hair is torn. “I did not go on a rampage today.”

You blink. “If… if you didn't fight anyone, what happened?” You looked back to his hair and winced. It looked painful.

Alastor’s smile widens to grotesque proportions. “I did this to myself.” His eyes watched you heatedly as you stumbled back in shock at his confession. “It's a bit of a habit, you see. I tend to rip out my hair when I'm feeling stressed to the point that even slaughter will not relieve it.”

Your ears drop.

“I never thought you would run from me, dearest. Now tell me,” Alastor’s hands are creeping up towards his head as his eyes cloud with fervour, “why are you so afraid of me?”

“Alastor!” You rush forward, clumsily pressing yourself against him and grabbing his hands with yours before he can tug at his hair again. You lace your fingers with his longer ones, feeling your face burn hotly as your body shook nervously. “W-why do you need my soul? Can't we do it all without me giving you my soul?”

Alastor tightens his fingers around yours. “I admit I am a complete novice in the area of… romance, but is it not a romantic gesture? I would give you my soul if I were able.”

You couldn’t help but to laugh and Alastor raises a brow. “If that's what you think, then you have thousands of spouses already, including Husk.” You snicker again when Alastor’s eye twitches.

“Husker.” Alastor utters in disbelief. “My spouse?” He looks as though he just swallowed rotten meat.

“Romance can be almost anything if the partner appreciates it.” You smile. “A flower. A walk together. Dinner with each other. Stargazing. Anything really as long as you enjoy their company.”

Alastor raises your hand slowly towards his lips and you shiver (and not from fear) as he places a gentle kiss on the back of your hand. “My lovely Doe, would you care to accompany me on a walk in my bayou?”

Your face softens as your eyes move towards Alastor’s missing chunk of hair. “As long as you come talk to me when you get to that point again. I don't want you hurting yourself, especially over me.”

“It's not a big deal, Darling. My hair will be grown back by tomorrow morning.” Alastor lets out a hum at your glare. “But I suppose I can if you wish.”

As long as he got his sweet Doe in the end.

#alastor x reader #x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel

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songmingisthighs · 8 months

Text

You <3 I

group : ateez

pairing : mingi × reader

genre : smut, oneshot

wc : 2 k

warning : mdni, sex, mature content, soft dom!mingi, unprotected sex (it's condom not sindom)

a/n : requested by @certifiedmoa

buy me coffee ?

Travelling with your boyfriend for his work has never been an issue for you. Heck, it's fun because you both get to explore places and cultures together and if you look stupid, at least you look stupid together and you were sharing that moment. You love him, truly and dearly, but sometimes you do wonder if he loves you or his work more.

It had been two hours since you both checked into the hotel, approximately an hour and a half since his manager told him that there was no schedule today si he was allowed to explore on his own. But what did your boyfriend do? Plant his ass on a chair and work. Sure, most days this happen, you'd just stick by him and accompany him finishing up his work. But most days you're in his studio and where you were was definitely not his studio. So many potential of fun yet his focus is doing something he'd usually complain about days on end. He didn't even realize that you had been sitting on the bed, pouting and glaring at him for the past 10 minutes.

Well, if you wanted to do something, it was now or never.

Just as Mingi was about to clip the audio, his iPad was taken out of his hands and off his lap and before he could complain, you had carefully placed yourself in straddle on his lap. "Baby!" He exclaimed, trying to reach for his iPad but you closed the cover and placed it on a nearby coffee table. "Don't you 'baby' me," you huffed, crossing your arms on your chest, "I have been waiting for you to get off your ass and do something with me for two hours, Mingi, I am not kidding when I said you seem to pay more attention to your work than me even when we're at a four star hotel with a nice view!"

Your rant surprised Mingi mostly because he hadn't realized that it had been two hours since he "checked out" his work. He swore he had only wanted to take a peek of the revision he uploaded but time slipped past him and he felt bad.

"Aww, I'm sorry baby," his big hands grabbed you gently by the hips and his thumb began rubbing gentle circles over your leggings, "I didn't realize I was taking that long. Can I make it up to you?"

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Maybe Mingi being so overly focused on his job was a good thing if it means that you were getting eaten out this good.

"F-fuck," you gasped, head lolling back as your chest arched to the ceiling. From between your spread legs, Mingi looked up at you with a satisfied smirk on his lips, "Feeling good, baby?" He chuckled. The movement of his lips on your clit paired with the vibration of his voice made you shuddered out a sigh and thighs threatening to snap around Mingi's head. He didn't even bother pulling your leggings and panties all the way off, they were simply pulled down to your knees and each movement you made, the flimsy garment rode up, securing Mingi's position on your cunt. "Better than good, I-I, shit- M-Mingi please, I wanna cum," you whined, hands gripping the sheets tightly due to desperation. Oh-so-simply, Mingi drag his tongue from your opening slowly to your clit muttering loud enough for you to hear, "Fuck, so eager. My sweet, sweet love being so good for me by making me happy. Do whatever you want on me, you deserve as much."

The words that came out of Mingi's mouth felt more like an order than permission and it made you visibly shudder. So you grabbed onto the sheets beneath you and began grinding your cunt on Mingi's face. It was as if your hips had a mind of its own with how feantic the movements seem. The moment you realized the way your body reacted to him, you tried putting some space between you two from being shy all of a sudden but Mingi seem to be enjoying every bit of it as seen from the way his hands turned like talons, gripping the underside of your thighs tightly, making sure his nails were making crescent indents to mark you.

Just as you were about to cum hard on his tongue, Mingi ripped his lips away from your nether ones abruptly sending you nearly jumping up only for Mingi to move quicker than you by pressing on your chest gently gently as he only wanted to ensure your position and pushing you down on the bed. You don't know which was hotter, the sight of Mingi panting, the flush of his cheeks paired with the glaze in his eyes, or the way his tongue ran along his bottom lip, greedily collecting your juice as if not wanting them to go to waste. "Baby, I'm sorry but if you're gonna cum, it's gonna be on my cock," he panted.

It was your last warning before he pushed your knees open and expertly nudge the tip of his cock into your pulsing hole. The pressure of the head made your eyes roll back into your head while your hips tried to meet his movements only to fail because he was keeping you in position. Meanwhile, Mingi was enjoying the tension from holding himself back. Between feeling your warm cunt that provided a biting edge of pleasure and watching your eyes watering from anticipation, Mingi didn't know which was better. With a roll of his hips, his cock slowly entered you. Your head was thrown back and your thighs tensed from the delicious drag of his length filling you up until it was completely sheathed inside you, the tip kissing your cervix which sent a chill down your spine.

Though Mingi himself wanted to move and his hips found it hard to remain still, he enjoyed how you look falling apart on his cock with the way you gasped and bit your bottom lip from your pleasure. A rumble bubble in his chest from how hard he tried to control himself so before he completely lost it, he began peppering kisses along your jaw and exposed neck. "Baby, baby," his voice managed to pause your whining momentarily but not your squirming, "I need to move, okay? Can you handle that? Can you handle me making love to you? I wanna see you cum when I fill you up, okay?" Though Mingi didn't mean to rile you up, your breath became laboured and with a low whine, you grabbed the back of his neck and locked lips with him.

Mingi took your action as permission for him to move so he began rolling his hips upwards, meeting your pubic bones with each wave of movement.

Neither you nor him were experts in sex per se, but you both were just so compatible with each other that your connection reached the most intimate aspects of your lives. A lot can be said about the minimal movement Mingi did; starting from the way he cupped the back of your head, to the way he let your fingers tangle together in a firm yet loving grip, and the way he minimized the chance of you two being detached by grinding on you rather than jackhammering his talented hips on you. It felt great because you were stimulated in different ways all at once, something you had never experienced before you met Mingi and while it took a while for you both to be able to understand what worked for each other, you both did a pretty good job of taking mental notes of what the other like.

Especially Mingi.

While Mingi had a rather higher level of libido, he found himself feeling even more pleasure when he was able to pleasure you. The idea of you unravelling from him, being so affected, it was an ego boost. And you supported that idea by letting him know that you have never felt like that before. From the moment he made the discovery, he began taking care of you more than he cared about taking care of himself. Technically, when he took care of you, he was most definitely taking care of himself. It was a win-win situation.

"F-fuck- Mingi!" You gasped, your free hand reaching to the back of his head to tug on the soft, short hair near his nape. The tug made Mingi let out a groan followed by a low hum, the lack of space between you two allowed the vibration to hover on the skin of your chest. "Don't do that, baby, I don't wanna go rough on you tonight," he mumbled as he pressed his forehead on yours, letting out a shaky breath before his hips moved even faster.

Maybe it was due to the denial of your previous release but you could feel your high coming. Your body gave away signs of your release and Mingi always seemed to notice it. The corner of his lips tugged upwards and the waves of hip rolls were given a slight edge when he started hitting you harshly. The impact caused you to almost got sent reeling back and on instinct, your free hand wound around his shoulder and held him close. "Fuck!" Mingi grunted when he felt your pebbled nipples rubbing against his chest and your voice echoing in his ears, turning his brain fuzzy. "Baby, I wanna cum in you but you gotta cum for me first, I wanna see you make a mess, can you do that?" It was almost comical that your cunt clenched around him when he said that but he couldn't find it in himself to make a comment.

With your feet locked behind him, resting right above the cute butt that you like to smack in passing, you locked his position and almost immediately, Mingi started pistoning his hips.

Obscene sounds came out of both of you be it from your mouths or from your bodies moving together. Had either of you had any shame left, a permanent blush would be tattooed on your cheeks and you would be sending your hotel neighbours apology letters and fruit baskets. But who cares about other people when one second you were holding onto your boyfriend for dear life and the next, your cunt had a vice grip that was hard enough to make Mingi hiss and still as he release his load in you when he felt your body trembling against his.

Mingi let out a silent huff followed by an almost silent 'fuck' which was only so because your orgasm caused your ear to ring. In the haze of your high, you could hear Mingi muttering about not wanting to cum that fast and blaming you for being too damn hot. If your face was not warm before, Mingi's cleverly veiled sexual compliment would've been able to allow you to warm up a hot pocket by just pressing it to your cheeks.

Sex with Mingi always took your breath away and it wasn't just because he fucks like a drill in an oil rig but it was also because it was... Him. Even as you lay there, trying to catch your breath, Mingi hovered above you with an arm propped so he could watch you.

"Stop looking at me like that!" you whined, trying to shield his gaze away by covering your face only for him to whine and shove your hands gently to the sides. "Like what, like you're the only person I've ever loved in my life?" he smirked, laughing when you smacked him square in his chest. "I'm gonna have to ask you to say that again so I can record it and send it to your mom," you teased, rolling your eyes as if you were annoyed but the slight tug on the corners of your lips gave your true feelings away.

"Are you okay now?" Mingi asked, asking if you'd fully caught your breath. Letting out one last sigh, you nodded, thinking that he was finally taking you out of the hotel.

But you soon found Mingi had another idea in mind because soon, he repositioned himself between your spread legs with a teasing glint in his eyes and the once softened cock coming back alive inside you.

"Great, because I'm not done with my plan on making this your best trip just yet."

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909 notes · View notes

violentdelightsandviolentends · 2 years

Text

Lessons in Love.

Bucky didn't believe in love at first sight. Then he met you.

Pairing - Bucky Barnes x female reader

Warnings - None

Word Count - 3615

Author's Note - hello gorgeous people, hope you're all doing well. writing this has made my heart so full, and I hope it makes you feel the same. requests are always open and more than encouraged!! currently working on a stunning jake seresin request that's just so lovely. i'm SO open to more jake requests, but also any marvel, top gun maverick, criminal minds, narcos and any others you have in mind!! just send them over, and I'll see what I can do. as always, so much love x

Masterlist. Requests.

“No way. How is that even possible?”

You look at the bewildered man in front of you and can’t help but smile.

“It’ll play anything you want it to. Anything in the world. Just ask it!” you encourage, beaming grin still plastered on your face.

“Alexa,” he says tentatively, “play Marvin Gaye.”

The first notes of Trouble Man begin to sound through your apartment, and his eyes light up. He’s looking at you like you’ve discovered something completely revolutionary.

You laugh – a real, genuine, delighted sound that flows through Bucky like a beam of light, illuminates his bones, makes his heart beat that little bit faster.

Grabbing your notebook, you delicately place a check next to Number 26 – voice-controlled devices. Number 27 is air fryers. Number 28 is Bluetooth. Number 29 is kindles and e-readers. Number 30 is Doordash. You’ve already checked off Spotify, and ATMs, and Google, and online banking, amongst many others. A list of things to better integrate Bucky into the 21st Century. A list of things to make him feel less like a man out of time. A list of things that allow you to spend all the time with him that you can.

A warm hand on your left hip and a cold one on your right pull you back into reality.

“Dance with me.” he murmurs. “Let me teach you something, for once.”

Before you can process his words, he’s gliding across the kitchen with you in his arms. Trouble Man isn’t playing anymore, instead replaced with something slower, richer. Bucky hasn’t taken his eyes off you, not even for a second. He’s watching your every move, every expression, every twitch of your lips. Reading you like a book.

You bring your hands to rest around his neck, and he relaxes into you. He’s leading, swaying you gently, occasionally twirling you like a ballerina in a music box. Perfectly effortless. He’s good at this.

The sun is setting, casting a warm orange hue across the kitchen. The light is reflecting onto your hair, making you glow, giving you a halo. Angelic, he thinks. My guardian angel.

You close the space between your bodies, wrapping your arms around his middle. Resting your head on his chest, he prays you can’t hear how his heart is working overtime. You shut your eyes, and breathe him in. He smells faintly like the Bakery, like sugar and coffee and cinnamon. The place that started it all.

　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵ 　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵ 　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵

When Bucky first moved into his apartment, he’d noticed the Bakery down the street immediately. The smell of cake and coffee drifted out of the lilac colored door, enticing him in. He resisted the urge, and told himself that he’d go inside tomorrow.

The next day, he stood outside of the red brick building, and read the menu on the noticeboard carefully. Then he reread it. And then read it again. Since when was coffee so complicated? And don’t even get him started on cake. He swore there was only a few types back in the forties. Now, there was at least fifty different kinds on this menu alone. He was overwhelmed. He thought he’d be able to walk into this Bakery, get some coffee, maybe something sweet, and leave content. Instead, he's stood on the sidewalk on the verge of a panic attack. Tomorrow, he thinks to himself. I’ll go in tomorrow.

Tomorrow never comes. Every day, he takes a walk, and purposely passes the building that he longs to go into. But somehow, he can never find the courage. He knows he’ll just look like an idiot if he walks in. He’ll look lost, and out of place, and everyone will laugh and mutter. Look, they’ll jeer, The Winter Soldier can’t even order a coffee.

And so, he spares himself the pain. Lets his feet carry him past, only slowing down slightly when he passes the lilac door. Every day for three months, he takes the same route. Willing himself to go in, to find the courage. It’s just coffee, he tells himself. Get a grip.

Until, one day, you decided to change his life, unknowingly. Or maybe knowingly. He’s still not sure.

He takes his usual path, and just as he gets to the lilac door – you’re there. Stood, waiting, soft smile on your face. Bucky panics, and wills his feet to move faster, to take him away from this inevitably awkward situation. You stop him before he can make a run for it.

“Hi.”

Oh. You’re talking to him. You’re staring into his soul with no judgment, or fear, or trepidation. You’re staring into his soul with gentleness. Kindness. Friendship. He’s terrified.

“Uh – hi.” He rubs the back of his neck. Nervous habit.

“So, uh, I hope this isn’t weird, or anything. But, I’ve been watching you walk past every day for like three months, and, well…” you trail off. Now you look nervous. “Actually, I haven’t really thought this far ahead. I just see you, and I wanted to… invite you in, I guess? Not that you need an invite, of course not, we’re open to everyone, but… you always look like you’re going to come in, and then you never do. And I’ve been telling myself for months that I should properly invite you in, but now I’m realising this is, uh, really weird. And I’m sorry.”

You still have that gentle smile on your face, but it’s more tentative now. A dusting of pink is making its way onto your cheeks, and Bucky thinks it might be his new favourite color.

It’s now that he really starts to take you in. Your hair is blowing slightly in the breeze, and the sleeves of your sweater are pulled down over your wrists, to try and keep the New York chill at bay. You have bright, inquisitive eyes – eyes that contain hope, love, laughter. You make him feel almost peaceful. No one makes him feel like that. Damn.

You’ve stepped closer to him now, to get out of the way of the customers making their way through the door. You smell like sugar, and coffee, and optimism. He wants to breathe you in, let you settle in his lungs. A comfortable warmth spreads through his chest.

He decides to take a gamble and bear his truth to you. He’s not sure why, but he trusts you. He doesn’t trust anyone, these days. But he trusts you.

“Can I be honest with you?”, he asks, looking at you expectantly. You’re almost expecting him to laugh in your face at the absurdity of it all. You nod anyway, signalling for him to continue.

“I’ve been trying to work up the courage to come in. But every time I try, I just, uh-” he stutters, and you can tell that his mind is screaming at him, sounding alarm bells, begging him to stop with all this sudden vulnerability.

“It’s overwhelming, right?” you ask, cutting him off. Saving him. Guardian angel.

You see the relief in his body at your question. His fists unclench, the tension leaves his shoulders. He smiles bashfully. Half grateful, half embarrassed. You get it.

“Yeah,” he chuckles. You giggle, and he’s convinced that the melodious sound will circle around in his mind forever, like the Earth orbiting the Sun.

You fiddle with the strings of your mint green apron, and look at him. You’re gazing at him so earnestly that he’s worried he might spontaneously combust.

“Are you busy tonight?” you ask suddenly, and he feels so dizzy he’s concerned momentarily that he’s going to pass out.

“Uh, no. I’m not,” he replies, managing to force the words out of his mouth.

“We close at 6, so meet me here at 7.”

You still have that sparkle in your eye. He couldn’t say no to you if he tried.

“Why?” he queries. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t absolutely petrified at the turn the conversation has taken.

“I want to show you around. Maybe make you a coffee, introduce you to some of my favourite things. You won’t believe how good my raspberry and white chocolate cookies are. They’re best sellers for a reason,” you beam at him.

Beaming. He wonders how he’s lived his whole life without your light illuminating his universe. Anywhere he goes without you is going to feel so dark, he thinks. How did I ever live like this?

He manages to pull himself together to smile back at you. His first genuine grin in God knows how long. He’s forgotten what joy feels like, and he’s almost drunk on it now.

He agrees to your plan, and you turn on your heel, about to make your way back inside.

“Wait!” he yells, louder than intended. “What’s your name?”

Your lips turn up into a smirk, mischief seeping out of your pores.

“Come back at 7 and find out.” You wink at him, and he has to take a few deep breaths in order to stay conscious. With that, you leave him alone on the sidewalk, where he’s silently thanking the universe for dropping you in his lap. Finally, he thinks. The cosmic punishment is over.

He does come back at 7. In fact, he’s stood outside waiting at 6:45. He can see you mopping the floor, singing as you go. His supersoldier hearing allows him to listen to your voice, even from this far away. He’s never been more grateful for the thing he used to call a curse. He’d be cursed every damn day if it meant he got to listen to you like this.

At 6:58, you appear at the lilac door, beckoning him to follow you inside. He knows that stepping over that threshold is going to change him fundamentally. He can’t wait.

Upon entering, he’s hit with the smell of cinnamon, sugar, coffee, and you. A beautiful mix of all three. Without a second thought, he reaches out with his right hand, and gently brushes some flour from your cheekbone.

“Bucky,” he murmurs.

You can’t tear your eyes away from him. Lips slightly parted, chest heaving, it takes you a minute to register that he spoke.

“What?” you ask, dazed by the handsome stranger with the steel blue eyes.

“My name,” he speaks softly. “It’s Bucky.”

You smile knowingly, and take a deep breath. It’s overwhelming, meeting someone that you know is going to be in your life forever. You’re both feeling the same, neither of you sure just quite what to do.

You grab his left hand, sighing quietly in relief at the feeling the cool metal against your heated skin. Leading him gently, he lets you guide him through the front of the store, until you stop behind the counter. He’s convinced he’d let you lead him anywhere, as long as he gets to feel your skin, soft and warm, on his. Grounding. Comforting. Easy.

“What kind of milk do you like?” you ask, fingers still intertwined with his.

“There’s more than one kind of milk?”

Bucky looks so disorientated, that you want to kiss the confused expression off his face. You chuckle softly, and the sound bounces off the metal in the room, twinkling around him.

“We have cows’ milk, oat milk, almond milk and soy milk.” You take one look at him, and decide to change course. “Let’s start with something less complex, actually. Any allergies I should know about?”

He shakes his head, mischievous grin beginning to form on his handsome face. There he is, you think. He’s with me.

“I’m going to make you a latte. It’s milky, and not too strong or too sweet. I think you’ll like it.”

She thinks I’ll like it, he muses. And he trusts you - whether it be with his life, or just a cup of coffee.

You reluctantly let go of his hand, and begin to flit around, gathering everything you need. Bucky leans back against the counter and watches carefully. He watches the way you bite your lip when you measure out the milk. He watches the way the steam from the coffee machine blows your hair back from your face gently. He watches the way you’re trying to make everything perfect. He can’t remember the last time someone paid attention to him like this. His mind is telling him to sprint in the opposite direction, to excuse himself and never come back. He’s terrified. But he stays. I deserve this, he thinks. I deserve something good.

You pull him from his thoughts by handing him the mug of warm coffee. He takes it from you carefully, and, without breaking eye contact, takes a sip. He smiles, really smiles. That’s all the validation you needed.

“Let me show you where we bake everything,” you say quietly, as if you’re afraid to burst this bubble of warmth and trust you’ve created. You’re scared he’s going to bolt if you give him the chance. So, you don’t. You take his hand once more, and guide him through to the kitchen.

“Have you done much baking in your life, Bucky?”

No, he thinks. But I will. I’ll bake everyday for the rest of my life if it means you’ll love me. If you’ll make me coffee and smile at me like that.

Instead, he answers cautiously.

“Not really. I’d like to, though.” He adds that last part bashfully. You smile back at him earnestly.

“Well then you’re in the right place,” you wink. He has the overwhelming urge to drop to his knees. To pray at your altar. To worship you like an angel sent down just for him. He’s surprised he’s still stood on two feet.

Before he can even register what’s happening, you’re beginning to create a mixture for your infamous cookies. You direct him to stir, while you add meticulously measured ingredients into the bowl.

“Put those arms to good use,” you’d smirked, and a blush had risen up to his cheeks almost instantly.

You click the radio on, and a soft, jazzy melody begins to drift through the room. You’re humming quietly, gliding around the kitchen, and he decides that this is it for him. You’re it for him. He could watch you do this every day and die a happy man.

Cookies baking in the oven, you jump up to sit on one of the counters. Bucky moves to stand in between your legs, still being careful to keep his distance ever so slightly. He knows if he touches you, he won’t ever want to let go.

“This wasn’t as scary as I thought it was going to be,” he confesses.

“What, me?” you tease.

“No. Coffee. And cookies,” he chuckles.

“Are there lots of things that you haven’t done because you find them scary?” you ask genuinely. You want to know him. All of him. Fears, wants, quirks. All of it.

“Yeah, actually. The world is so different now. I don’t really know where to start. It’s all terrifying, honestly,” he laughs. You laugh with him, but you know there’s truth to his words. You want to wrap your arms around him. He may be 6 foot tall and made of solid muscle and vibranium, but you want to protect him.

“Why don’t we do it together?”

A pause. He’s confused again.

“Do what together?”

“All of it. The learning. I’ll help you. Everything is less scary if you do it with someone else.”

It’s now that he’s convinced he’s dreaming. You can’t be real. Why would you be here, offering him everything, after all that he’s done? He has to remind himself. I deserve this. I deserve something good.

You can sense his trepidation, so you keep talking.

“Why don’t we make a list? You write down the things you want to learn about. I’ll write down other things I think you should know. You’ll be an expert on the 21st Century before long, Buck.”

Buck. The nickname sounds like a gift coming from your lips.

“Okay. Yeah. Are you sure you don’t mind?”

The anxiety is coming off him in waves. He’s panicking. You grab a hold of both of his hands, and place one on each of your legs, just above your knees. He steps in closer, and takes a breath. You’re warm, and you’re soft, and you’re love personified. He’s okay.

“Of course I don’t mind. I’m excited!” you assure him. Then, quieter, “It means I get to spend more time with you.”

He aims a beaming, megawatt smile in your direction. He feels as if his nerve endings are alight. You’ve awoken something in him. He’d forgotten what it was like to feel like this. To feel alive.

You reach over and grab your notebook. In it, you simply write his name, followed by a love heart. Then, underneath, you begin to list everything you can think of that you want to teach him. You hand the list to him, and he adds his own requests. Between you, you manage to write 50 different lessons.

“Perfect. We’ll start with number one, and work our way down. Are you busy tomorrow evening?”

He chuckles at your eagerness, but secretly, he can’t wait. He knows he’ll be counting down the hours until he can see you again.

“Nope, I’m not. You are my only priority, sweetheart.”

The term of endearment seeps into your skin, settles in your ribcage. You’re convinced it’ll warm you up from the inside out. If he keeps calling you sweetheart in that Brooklyn drawl of his, you’ll never be cold again.

　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵ 　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵ 　 ⋆ 　　 . ✵

You’re not sure if you’ve been swaying in your kitchen with Bucky to Marvin Gaye for 2 minutes or 2 hours. You’re comfortably settled into him, as if the space in his arms was made especially for you. Maybe it was.

Bucky’s voice breaks through the solitude.

“You know, I’ve created my own list,” he murmurs against the top of your hair, where he’s resting his head.

You pull back, still in his arms, to look at him carefully.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. Read it, and tell me what you think.”

He untangles himself from you and crosses the room, to retrieve his leather-bound notebook. He returns, and places it carefully in your awaiting hands.

You flick open the cover to reveal the first page. You recognise his handwriting instantly. It’s spiralling, and imperfect, but so Bucky. At the top of the page, you spot the title – your name, with a love heart next to it. Exactly the same as you’d done for him when you’d originally created your list together.

Underneath your name, only one thing is written.

I love you.

You look up at him, to see him watching you, holding his breath. Neither of you know what to say. You know what you want to say. You want to tell him that you hope the list never ends, so you always have an excuse to spend time with him. You want to tell him that you watched him walk past the door of the Bakery every day for 3 months because you thought he was the most beautiful person you’d ever seen. You want to tell him that every time he looks at you, you feel as if you’re going to pass out. You want to tell him that you can recognise him anywhere, by touch or smell alone. Instead, you say,

“You do?”

That genuine, million dollar smile is back, etched on his face. He’s glowing, light radiating from his bones.

“Yes. I do. I think I’ve loved you ever since I saw you waiting for me on the doorstep of the Bakery that day.”

You think you might be floating. Levitating above ground, fuelled by love. You laugh.

“That’s the exact moment I fell in love with you.”

He laughs with you, then. You could get drunk off the sound.

“I didn’t think love at first sight was a real thing. I thought I was going crazy,” he confesses.

He’s convinced that the two of you have discovered something, invented it even. Because he doesn’t understand. If love feels like this, so all encompassing, so consuming – how does anyone live? Every moment of every day, Bucky thinks of you. How does anyone go to work? How does anyone ever feel sad, or angry, when love like this exists?

You drop the notebook and cross the room to him. He closes the gap, and throws his arms around you, spinning you in circles, laughing with joy. He sets you back on your feet, and tilts your chin up, so you’re looking into his steel blue eyes. You could drown in the ocean of his irises if he let you.

He leans down, and presses his lips to yours. He’s giving you all of the love, the joy, the laughter – everything good that he has ever felt, because of you – through his kiss. Your knees go weak, and he holds you up by your waist, his strong arms encircling your frame. He tastes like coffee, and sugar, and promises. You’ll never want to taste anything else.

Eventually, you break away for air. You gaze up at him, and he sees sunshine in your eyes. He’s not sure what he did to earn a love like this. You seem to sense his doubts creeping in, because you say, in the most assured voice he’s ever heard –

“No one has ever loved anyone as much as I love you.”

I deserve this, he thinks. I deserve something good.

5K notes · View notes

aventurinespuppy · 13 days

Text

bully scaramouche x gn reader (part two)

CW: smut, mentions of bullying, dubcon, sub reader, gn reader, choking, slapping, biting, cumming inside, doing it in a classroom, blacking out

WC: ~1.3k

AN: this has been sitting in my drafts for SOO long cuz i had to muster up the confidence to write a sex scene LMAOO i kinda went wild with this one but please enjoy

He lowers his voice and speaks in a sultry tone. "I've taken quite the liking to you." His hand drops to hold your throat and leans closer to your ear. "How about you be mine?"

You scoff and peel his hand off of your neck.

"Are you kidding me?"

He chuckles and steps back from you, allowing you a tiny smidge of space.

"Why won't you look at me, hm? Scared you won't be able to resist after seeing my handsome face?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" You turn around to look at him and glance at the door behind him, wondering if you had bitten off more than you could chew. He notices your gaze shifting to the door.

"Surely you're not thinking of leaving already? You're the one who brought me here after all."

You bring your attention back to him and make eye contact with him, sighing as you take note of his cocky smirk. You brace yourself with a deep breath and speak as steadily as your nerves allow you.

"I've gotten lots of complaints about you from both students and teachers" You pause to observe his reaction, continuing when he stays silent. "Since I'm the school council president, you fall under my responsibility." He doesn't stop looking at you the entire time you speak and you falter slightly under his intense gaze. "So, um.. I'd appreciate if you brushed up on your behaviour."

He seems to genuinely take in what you say and you internally celebrate, hopeful that he'll agree and reduce your future workload. It was hard work always cleaning up his messes after all.

"Quite demanding, aren't we? I'll consider it if you do a favour for me."

You quirk an eyebrow up at him and he grins down at you. You mentally prepare for his next words. God forbid if he asks you to do his homework for the next month. You had enough on your plate.

"If you let me fuck you, I might just stop."

His words come out naturally, as if this was a normal request to make. Your eyes widen and you take a moment to process his words. Did you hear him right?

"W-What? Are you insane?" You back up and hit the table behind you, gripping onto the edge of it as to not lose your footing. He chuckles at your speechlessness and takes a step toward you, leaving you no space to move.

"Maybe I am. Now will you let me fuck you or not? I don't have all day to wait for you to decide."

You lean back as much as you can and turn away, distancing yourself from him. Seemingly unhappy with the newly added space between the two of you, he leans in again and cages you in between his arms. Your eyes wander all over the room, looking anywhere but at him.

"W-We can't.." You squeeze your eyes shut and let out a noise somewhat akin to a squeak when you feel him take a strand of your hair and twirl it around. He murmurs softly to you.

"We can't? We're both adults here and I've seen the way you look at me. Don't pretend you don't want this too."

You look into his eyes, filled with desire. He glances down at your lips and you at his. It doesn't take much more before you're both leaning in to capture each other's lips in a hungry kiss.

Your fingers play with his hair and his hands wander to your waist. He pushes you down onto the table, one hand behind your head to make sure you don't hurt yourself. You chuckle to yourself at this sweet gesture. He pulls away and starts kissing down your neck.

"What're you laughin' at, huh?" he mumbles agains your skin. His breath tickles your neck and you giggle again.

"Nothing, just.. didn't know there was a soft side to you."

He bites down hard on your neck at this and you wince.

"What was that for?!"

"I'll show you how rough I can be and you'll regret calling me soft."

He leans back in for a rough kiss and starts unbuttoning your shirt. You get the hint and unbuckle your belt, but as you start to wiggle out of your pants, he grabs your wrist and stops you.

"Leave it on. The door's still unlocked y'know."

You glare at him, silently telling him to let go of you so you could lock the door properly and he chuckles, tightening his grip on your wrists.

"That's it.. Keep looking at me with that look on your face. Makes me wanna ruin you all the more."

He lets go of your wrists and turns you around to face away from him and before you can question what he's doing, he presses your face into the table and you groan out from the force. You scold him to be more careful and you receive no response as he moves to pull your pants down just enough to expose your eager hole.

Without warning, he sticks a finger in, poking around your insides as you struggle to suppress your sounds. He notices this and tries even harder to pull some noises out of you, adding another finger and stretching you out with a scissoring motion.

"Stop teasing, you asshole.. Put it in already." You say through gritted teeth. To emphasise how badly you need him, you wiggle your hips enticingly, which only earns you a harsh smack on the ass.

"Patience is a virtue. One you clearly lack, my dear." And with that, he pulls out his fingers, leaving you empty, but not for long as he abruptly thrusts his cock into you. You curse him out and grip the edge of the table, unprepared for the intrusion, and he laughs at you.

"What was that earlier? You could never like me? Hah.. Don't make me laugh. Look at you now, drooling over my cock and I haven't even started moving yet."

"You talk too much.." You mumble and he slaps your ass again, making you jolt. He grabs onto the fat of your hip roughly and his other hand wraps around your throat as he starts pulling out slowly, only to harshly slam his cock back into you.

He continues with this slow but rough pace for a while until you beg for him to "go faster!!", to which he rolls his eyes but obliges.

A mix of lewd, wet noises and the both of your groans and moans fills the classroom, the both of you getting lost in the pleasure and forgetting that you're still in school. You could've sworn you heard some footsteps coming down the corridor, just stopping outside your classroom, but who knows? You were certainly too far gone to care.

He fucks you mercilessly, not letting up on his harsh pace at all, abusing your poor hole and you're sure you'll be feeling the effects tomorrow, but right now, all you could think about sucking his cock back into your greedy hole.

You feel his breath tickle your ear as he leans down to talk to you and you vaguely hear him say something along the lines of.. cumming inside? Your cockdrunk brain can barely hear, let alone process what he's saying to you, only begging for more pleasure and you hear his melodious laugh ring beside you as you realises you're completely in subspace.

At some point you swear your vision blacks and the next thing you know, you wake up, confused and alone. Blinking a few times, you try to regain your senses and look around. Anger and embarrassment paint your face red as you remember what happened. You scan the room for your clothes and you find them folded in a neat pile, with your phone on top. Your phone screen lights up and you squint to read the top message:

'I'll be seeing you again, my lovely council president.' - Unknown

---------------------------------------------------------

@drthymby

#genshin impact #genshin smut #genshin x reader #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche smut #genshin impact smut #genshin x gn reader

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30somethingautisticteacher · 2 months

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It had been the week from hell. Tommy had been a firefighter for a long time, but he'd never experienced this many losses in such a short span of time. He felt drained, both mentally and physically.

Tommy had never been one to show vulnerability. It was ingrained in him from a young age that showing emotion was showing weakness. Men were meant to be strong and stoic. "Boys don't cry, Thomas," his father's voice echoed in his memory. For years, he'd buried his feelings deep, presenting a facade of unwavering strength to the world.

It wasn't until Evan that he truly let himself feel the depths of his emotions. Evan was his safe space, and honestly, Tommy wasn't sure he'd ever had one of those before. With Evan, he could finally let his guard down.

His fingers hovered over his phone before he typed:

T: Hey baby. Another rough day.

E: Oh babe, I'm so sorry. How are you holding up?

T: Barely. Be home soon. I love you.

E: Love you too, T. I'll be here waiting.

The simple exchange brought a lump to Tommy's throat. The only silver lining to this hellish week was knowing he had Evan to come home to – someone who understood him, someone he could be vulnerable with. For the first time in his life, Tommy felt like he could face his emotions head-on, knowing he had a soft place to land.

When Tommy arrived home, he didn't go in right away. He just sat in the truck with his head down, the weight of the week pressing heavily on his shoulders. Time seemed to stand still until a gentle tapping on the window broke through his haze. He looked up to see Evan's concerned face peering in at him.

Tommy opened the door, his movements slow and weary. Evan's voice was soft, understanding. "Hey, let's get you inside, ok?"

Tommy just nodded, lacking the energy for words. He allowed Evan to take some of his weight as they walked inside, grateful for the support both physical and emotional. Evan guided him to the couch, easing him down onto the soft cushions.

With tender care, Evan began to undress Tommy, his touch gentle and comforting. There was an intimacy to the act that went beyond the physical - it was Evan silently communicating his love and support. Once Tommy was undressed, Evan helped him up and walked him to the shower.

The warm water began to fall, and Evan stepped in with Tommy. He reached for the soap and began to gently lather Tommy's body. There was nothing sexual about it; this was pure care and comfort. Evan's hands moved with purpose, washing away not just the grime of the day but also trying to soothe the emotional toll it had taken.

Throughout it all, Tommy remained quiet, allowing himself to be cared for in a way he'd never experienced before Evan. He felt a profound sense of safety and acceptance. It was unfamiliar territory for Tommy, but here, with Evan, he could finally let his guard down completely. The simple act of being washed, of being tended to without expectation, spoke volumes. It said, "I'm here, I see you, and it's okay to not be okay." For Tommy, who had spent a lifetime holding himself together, this silent understanding meant everything.

Evan gently toweled Tommy off, his movements careful and considerate. He helped Tommy get dressed in a pair of soft, well-worn sweatpants and an old t-shirt. The familiar comfort of the clothes seemed to ease some of the tension in Tommy's shoulders.

They walked to their bedroom together, Evan's hand a steady presence on Tommy's lower back. Evan turned to Tommy, his voice soft and understanding. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Tommy shook his head, not quite ready to put words to the weight he was carrying.

"Ok, love. I'm here if you do though," Evan reassured him, not pushing but making sure Tommy knew the option was there.

For a moment, Tommy was quiet. Then, his voice barely above a whisper, he asked, "Will you just hold me? Please?"

Without hesitation, Evan pulled his big, strong boyfriend into his arms. Tommy, who had always been the one who stayed strong for others, allowed himself to fall apart in Evan's embrace. Evan continued to hold Tommy close, his fingers gently carding through Tommy's hair. As the minutes passed, Tommy's body began to shake with silent sobs. Tears he had been holding back all week finally broke free, soaking into Evan's shirt.

Evan didn't try to shush him or tell him it would be okay. He simply held Tommy tighter, providing a place for Tommy to release all the overwhelming emotion. His steady presence was a silent promise: "I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere."

Gradually, Tommy's sobs subsided, replaced by deep, shuddering breaths. The rhythmic motion of Evan's hand in his hair and the warmth of his embrace lulled Tommy into a state of exhausted calm. Before long, his breathing evened out and his body relaxed completely against Evan's.

He had cried himself to sleep, finding solace in the arms of the man who had taught him it was okay to be vulnerable. Evan pressed a gentle kiss to Tommy's forehead, then settled in for the night, ready to be there when Tommy woke, just as he always would be.

#bucktommy #tevan #kinley #nonsexual intimacy #ficlet #30sat writes

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daichiduskdrop · 1 year

Text

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚⋆·˚ ༘ *𝙎𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙡 ⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

CHAPTER 00 - PROLOGUE

Pairing: BTS Ot7 X fem! reader

Genre: A/B/O AU, Fluff, Angst, Strangers to lovers, (might do smut in the future)

Warnings: loneliness, anxiety, indicated sa (hardly mentioned at all)

AN.: Hello everyone! This is pretty much my first time writing a FF, and English isn't my first language, so please be patient with me :)

If you enjoy this story, please let me know and I'll continue it. Don't hesitate if you have anything to say, I'm always looking for good advice. Please take care of yourself :))

⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ੈ✩‧₊˚✧˚ · .*ੈ✩‧₊˚

It was a bitterly cold and snowy day. The frigid temperatures had been persistent for days, and there was no sign of relief in sight. December had just begun, but it already felt like an endless winter. While the snowflakes were beautiful as they fell to the ground, they brought a feeling of sadness and loneliness.

You loved the hot chocolates you would make for yourself in the small kitchen, you loved bundling up in a soft blanket on the sofa and watching anothe movie. You loved the seasonal Christmas themed ads that were blaring at this time of the year from every corner.

Yes, you loved Christmas, you stopped to remind yourself. Of course you did. Yet still, there was this deep nagging. A feeling of desire, that carried sadness.

'It's snowing like the world is about to end' you thought as you looked from the window that tightly sealed. There wasn't much to look at, even thought the afternoon was only just ending, through the strong snowstorm there was hardly anything visible.

You didn't watch the final race of the snowflakes for much longer. Standing up from your wooden floor you made your way to your apartment door - or more so tried to. Your pillows, blankets, old books and canvases were scattered all around so it proved to be bit of a challenge.

Your room was a mess, it has been like that for far too long. Old newspaper cutouts glued on the walls, posters, painting without frames hung up or just pushed in the corner of the room, where shadows hid them well. There wasn't enough space for them all. Books stacked up in tall chimneys, your phone somewhere burried in-between. You didn't bother to look for it too much.

Lacing up your boots, you took a last look in the mirror. As an omega it was always expected of you to look proper and taken cared of, even if it wasn't always the case. Your heavy jacket felt too heavy on your shoulders, but you knew that you would quite literally freeze to death otherwise. A white woolen scarf was tied around your neck, covering your face up to your nose. It felt comfortable against your cheeks and the scent was also pleasant, so even as it grew older, you still kept it and worn it every winter.

You grabbed your wallet, and pocketed your keys. The small bunny keychain dangled with the movement. It used to be white with few brown spots, but that wore of with the time too. Still, even if most of the colour was missing, you liked it.

With the lock clicking behind you, you started walking down the open hallway to the apartment building entrance. The rooms were only on one side, so it didn't take much time until the cold air swept you from the right. The layer of snow on the wooden railing has grown to over 10 centimetres, and that was only from this day, since it got swept pretty much every morning. The landlord was quite sweet, as allowing an omega a home when they were alone with no alpha or beta in sight wasn't too usual.

Hiding more into your jacket you quickened your pace, and after getting down the steps, you started the walk towards the pharmacy.

Snowflakes fell into your hair, as you made your way down the few streets and roads. Luckily, not many people were outside and so your smell wasn't noticed. It really wasn't too typical to see omegas walking on their own, basically anywhere. The society had strict standards that were followed since,- well, forever.

While some protested, it was just always for the better, anyone to see an omega that's completely alone, unmarked or at least scented was basically free to do anything they wished to.

It made you tremble just the slightest bit thinking about it, but you blamed it on the cold that surrounded you and shook it off. While you were on the outskirts of Seoul, it wasn't like you were constantly alone.

Yes, you reminded yourself once more. There were people around, like that nice looking lady down the street holding a hand of a little girl. She jumped and squeeled in the heavy snow, only to get lightly scolded by the beta for almost slipping in the forming ice. Pups were always the biggest priority, at least in every good pack.

As you walked further and further from your home, more stores appeared, lighting up the streets just enough for you to be more comfortable. The neon sings of restaurants, grocery shops, clothing boutiques and more were bright for your eyes, colourful and soon you started hearing bit more noise too. There were more cars passing by, people smoking cigarettes outside on the streets chatting together.

With the snow crunching underneath your feet you made your way to the mall closest to your apartment. You dusted of as much of the snow from yourself as possible, and walked inside. It felt a lot warmer immediately, but you didn't unzip your jacket too much. You knew your scent would carry too much and people would eventually notice, so you just continued on your way down the escalator, keeping to yourself with the crowd of people going downstairs with you.

Infront of you was another grocery store, that got you thinking about buying some food. The snowstorms often lasted a few days, and you doubted that it would be pleasant to walk here again tomorrow. You didn't have a lot home right now, as you avoided going until it was impossible. Plus the store here was a lot cheaper than the small shops closer to your apartment, that made a big profit from all the-

Your thoughts were interrupted by the loud sniffing behind you, something just lightly touching the back of your neck. Startled, you quickly turned, and nearly jumped from your skin. The man must have been in his forties, his eyes closed for a tiny second, before they opened and focused on your face. You averted your gaze, not wanting to seem like you wanted to start anything.

„What are you doing here alone like this?” his tone sounded concerned, but carried a weird undertone, that unsettled you even more. You felt chills run down your spine. You opened your mouth to answer, but your eyes could only widen more, as the last step lowered and you arrived at the floor. Stumbling, you regained your balance and nearly ran off in the way of the pharmacy.

Opening the door, a light bell sound chimed throughout the store, making few of the people in the queue turn to check the newcomer. Looking at your shoes, you shuffled to stand behind the last girl, her natural smell covered in a strong but very sweet perfume scent blockers. Growing up, in high schools, those were always popular for beta or even alphas to wear, to make themselves appear more approachable if their scent wasn't intriguing enough for their liking.

Such perfumes didn't work on omega scents, those were always naturally alluring and hard to cover. Scent blockers were then often used, but since you didn't go out a lot back in highschool, you hardly ever had to use them. You would, now being in college you were constantly around unknown people, so it would come with a nice benefit - sometimes all of the attention that came with being an omega wasn't nice at all. But those were expensive, and the even cheapest ones were bit too pricey for you. Plus the ones you ever tried always made you uncomfortable, and unsettled with how chemically they smelled.

The wet shoeprints with slight mud covered the tiled floors, as you patiently waited for your turn to receive your prescription. And so as the girl before you took the small bottle of medicine, thanked and made her way out again, you took the small paper from your wallet.

„Hi, what can I do for you?” asked the older man behind the counter. His hair was gray and his eyes seemed tired. With the winter season, there must be many people coming with bad colds.

„Hello,” you mumbled looking behind him at the shelves filled with medicaments, „I have a prescription of a medication from my doctor;” he leaned in closer to hear you better. Your voice was naturally just a bit too quiet. Placing the paper onto the sleek counter, you looked away as he nodded and opened it. Taking just a few seconds to read over its contents he bristled to the shelves, pulling out a brown bottle with a white cap.

„...Right here miss. I will just need you to sign a document, that states that your pack alpha is aware of this and agreed to your doctor decision.” smiling, his cheeks lifted as he took a paper from underneath the desk.

You blinked in a surprise, and felt your fingers start to slightly tremble. 'Since when was this a thing? You got your medicine just fine month or two ago, what --?'

„My pack alpha- I-”

He looked back at me after retrieving a pen with calm eyes.

„Yes miss, here... You just fill in your pack alpha's name, and your pack serial number, or if you can't remember the whole thing, you can just write your pack alpha's phone number, we can get in touch later and I will complete the form process with them. You don't have to worry about it at all.” Once again, the worker smiled brightly, seemingly trying to calm you down.

„I know the number is hard to remember, my daughters always forget it too.” lightly chuckling, you could smell just the lightest hint of calming pheromones in the air. Scrunching up the nose at the smell, your anxiety only risen.

If you won't get the medicine you will get in a lot of trouble, and miss even more college lessons, no, you can't miss anymore, and-

„umm- can.. can I just call them first? I'm not so sure-” your voice trembled just the slightest bit as you squeezed your fingers around the prescription. The man once again laughed and nodded his head.

„Of course you can! It's no issue. Just come back again with the prescription and we can go over this again miss.” Nodding slightly, stunned still, just turned on your heel and walked off, the ground slippery with the melted snow, making you almost slip a few times. You eyes clouded with tears and you sniffled loudly as you opened the pharmacy door. Defeated, you clutched your other hand in a tight grip, unsettled and confused. You could bet that your anxious scent was wafting off all over the place.

Your vision blurry, you started heading back towards the escalators, walking next to a shoe boutique and a barber shop, you reminded yourself of the way outside. Your plans were definitely different from this, and getting lost in a mall was also not included on the list so you tried your best way to walk where you remembered the right side entrance to be. With most of the people left by now, the 21nth hour was quickly approaching, and a many of trail scents left behind confused you even more.

More tears sprung up to your eyes, and your vision got even blurrier. Not having any scents to stick to, as the ones that were around when you walked to the pharmacy were exchanged for different ones, you were left in a sensory overload, not even noticing when a man bristly walked towards you.

„Hey.., hey, what's going on? What's wrong?” He bended to your eye level so you stood face to face. A white facemask was covering his face, so only his eye peeked through under his dark, long hair. A plain black newsboy cap matched with the long, thick coat that went bellow his bended knees. You looked away, just when your overwhelmed nose smelled that he was an alpha. A mixture of rain and a hint of levander that seemed to become more prominent every passing second. He was trying to calm you with his scent.

A small whimper broke out from your throat unwillingly. Your brain was just taking in bit too much for you to be able to process everything. Your scarf dampen with more tears falling onto it. The man hand quickly held your right arm, his other hand prying your fingers open, so you couldn't clutch your hands and accidently scratched yourself. He cooed at you and rubbed your arm while still holding your hand, squeezing just the smallest bit.

„...Hm? What is it?”

Looking up, you accidentally made eye contact, only to get yourself more stressed out. You were always taught to beware of any unknown people, especially alphas, and making an eye contact could be interpreted as a 'sure, let's get it on'.

His concerned eyes shocked you enough to stay like that for a bit longer. They were a lot cat like, and his eyebrows were furrowed, but not in a threatening way, no, it was worry.

„I was- was at the phar-macy..” you mumbled only to sob loudly, and your shoulders to start to shake. You looked at his facemask, trying to focus anywhere but at the alpha's eyes. Noticing you doing so, in a quick motion he pulled the mask bellow his chin, only to reveal a soft looking nose and full lips, left open just the slightest bit in focus.

His tongue darted out to lick them fastly, and he shuffled a bit closer, so the levander scent was even more prominent. „At the pharmacy? Did someone tell you something bad there? Do you not have enough money for your medicine?” His voice felt calming, but held a feeling of urgency in it. He stood back up, only to look behind you towards the store you came from just about two minutes ago.

„N-No.. that's not - it... My prescrb- prescrt-” stumbling over the word you whined softly, angry with yourself. This was really not what you needed to happen right now.

„Prescription kitty. What's with it? Had it already expired?” once again he lowered himself back down, but didn't let go of your hand and arm even once. Softly rubbing his thumb over your hand, he once again cooed at you.

„Need pack al-pha...” you cried out softly and looked at the floors. Frowning even deeper, he let go of your arm and pulled out his phone from his pocket. His other hand just pulled you a little closer, so his scent was even clearer.

The man fumbled with it for a few seconds, pressed it to his ear and waited, as the faint sound of ringing could be heard. A soft beep sound and another strangers voice went through, not loud enough for you to decipher.

„hey, where are you?”

„No, listen, I need you to come to the lowest floor, um- there is a,” whipping his head around he looked at the stores around us, „hairdresser shop here and uhh.. a pharmacy too, look just can you hurry please?”

„Ill tell you here, it's an omega .... Jimin-ah are you a fucking idiot?! Who said anything about heat? Aish..! Just hurry up, could you?”

For a second his scent got covered with a burning grass, a smell of agitation. Just as quickly as it came it was gone thought. Pocketing his phone once again, he looked back at you.

„My packmate is going to come here in a bit okay?” his voice once again soft.

„P-Packmate?” your eyes blew wide, only for more tears to come. What did that mean? Was they about to do something? Your worried thoughts circled your mind.

„Yea, but don't worry, okay? He's very-”

„Yah, hyung, what is it? What's going on?” you heard another man, only to be hit with another alpha scent, reminding you of soft vanilla blooms. „Gosh her scent is sweet..” he said lowly, so you hardly understood what he was saying. Looking up, you were met with eyes of another man. This time, circled rimmed glasses and a black face mask pretty much covered his whole face, only a small bit of his black hair peeking through underneath his dark grey beanie. A long, dark green trenchcoat with a crossbody purse like bag adored his body, making his shoulders stand out.

„I don't know...”

„Whats your name 'mega?” the newcomer asked, bending slightly to match your height too.

„..Y/N” you said as you looked away again. All of the scents were confusing you, and you shuffled at your feet. You could sense your flight or fight instincts start to come in, with how long you have been unsettled.

„..okay. Okay.” he sighed out. „My name is Yoongi, and that's Jimin. Kitty, where is your pack? Why are you here alone like this?”

You took a longer pause, too overwhelmed to answer quickly. It must have been bit too long for them thought.

„Hyung-”

„I don't ha-ve a p-pack..” sniffling, you avoided their gaze, hiding more into the scarf.

„..Well shit.” Jimin muttered, exchanging anxious looks with Yoongi.

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#bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts a/b/o #bts omegaverse #bts imagine #bts yoongi #bts jimin #hybrid bts #bts imagines #bts army #fanfic #strangers to lovers #a/b/o #omegaverse #bts smut #kpop smut #bts fluff #bts angst #bts soulmate au

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thewritersaddictions · 11 months

Text

Day Twenty-Nine: Karl Heisenberg + BreathPlay

You were constantly reaching out for Karl's hand. Enjoying the rough feeling of his cussed-covered fingers against your much softer hands.

Karl didn't seem to mind either after the initial shock that someone was touching him. Wantingly touching. You walked hand in hand to meet with the family and sat side by side. Pressed into his side, but continuously your fingers were interlocked.

Hand in hand when you walked around in town, and as much as Karl hated the idea of being around less intelligent people than him. He allowed you to drag him down to the middle of town and walk around the shops before returning to the factory after a long day out.

That was not the only time you wished that you could hold his touch. You yearned for a hand to run smoothly down your back and sometimes rest at the bottom of your spine. You longed for the soft touch of his rough hand.

You are the exact opposite of Karl. You yearn for the touch of another, and Karl yearns to not be touched. Karl is okay with his lonely life before you came along, and he's just as content with living it how it is now.

Yes, you are confused because when you look at Karl, you don't see just a friend, someone to talk to when the nights are quiet, and the factory is slow. No, Karl is something else for you. A bright light at the end of the tunnel. He's what you yearn for.

So when the touch you yearn for splits and turns into a need that you have to fill, something twists within your mind. You start to stare off more. Staring at Karl's hands as he works on bits of metal together, or how he tightness things together on a soldat.

The one that as you biting your tongue and squeezing your thigh together is when his hands stretch out, his metal hammer flying into his hand. It's attractive all on its own. The bludge of his veins, the girth of his fingers, it all has you in a haze.

"Y/n? Are you even paying attention to what I'm talking about?" Karl's booming voice pulls you from your naughty thoughts of his hands. "Huh." You say a bit too loud, and he rolls his eyes, "Earth to Y/n, what's got you being a space cadet today?" He asks, intrigued by your glazed-over eyes and gap mouth.

Karl has never seen you like this, and he's seen you in many ways. Blood smeared across your cheeks. A mixture of your own and others, your shirt half tore due to lycans desperately in need of stitches. Bare skin that makes his heart race every time he catches a glimpse. Y/n had been off, and Karl had taken notice. Take notice of how your gaze drifted from his face, down his arms, and then finally landed on his hands.

"I'm just… it's all fine." You say to Karl, trying to push away the fact that you not only got caught but also have no idea you were spacing out. His stare is deathly; you're an open book for him to read as much as he likes.

"No… I don't believe you. I think you were off dreaming…" You shake your head, trying to push him away from the right path he's already on. "Don't shake your head at me now, buttercup. Better if you just fess up to what you were thinkin' about." You feel like a deer in headlights. Wide-eyed and easily scared off.

The silence is unsettling, "Oh, buttercup, you want me to guess instead." Smirking up a storm, you think that's rather a good idea, and then it's a bad idea. But there's nothing else you can do. If you say the words, then it's all too real, but if he guesses it, then it means Karl already knows.

"I think…" He says, getting up from the side of the table, heavy boots on the ground beneath you. "you have been very naughty…" With each punch of the words that fall from his mouth, his hands graze up your back like you've always wished for. "thinkin' about me, and my hands." You breathe in quickly. If it's due to his touch or his words, you'll never know.

"I bet you've thought up a bunch of dirty things." He whispers into your ear. His voice was rough and scratchy. "I bet you would love it if I just wrapped my hand around your throat and kept you right on the edge all night long." You moan as you feel his hand reach the base of the back of your neck. "Let me just sink my fat cock into your tight pussy, hmm, squeeze your throat so you stars." You whimper as you clench your thighs tightly, willing the ache to go away.

Then just like that, Karl is gone, walking back over to his side of the table. You're left like a puppy following its owner. Shock is written all over your face. "Oh, what do you want more buttercup." He mutters as he walks off and towards the direction of the bedroom.

You follow like a lovesick puppy would.

Completed on: 08/20/23

Posted on: 10/28/23

Kinktober 23- @lanad3lreyscokewhor3 @homelanderscumdump @hummusxx@chvnsdimple @vvitzvafflezvv @lokisivy @claud-blood0703 @iliketoreads-stuff @all-that-glitters-is-treasure@clearscissorsbonkgiant-blog @lxonix--ac @piecesofx @mortallyswimmingpainter @playwithfire99 @fucak @everythingneytiri @lovetheos @xxxxxoseungxoooo @durazopato @hotpead42069 @oddseabiscuit @capoda @witching-hour @viviwows @lover103 @alexlovesfiction @katiecat10 @electricfans @jianasmind @max-505 @powerbun21o @the-horny-simp @missy420-0 @jaq-dav @arescosplays

Resident Evil Master List // House Heisenberg Master List // Kinktober '23

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mouseymilkovich · 27 days

Text

Speechless | Carmy x Reader | Final Chapter

previous chapter | masterlist | playlist | pinterest board

Chapter Summary: It's time for Sydney to look for a new job, and your fight with Carmy is still plaguing your mind. Then, miraculously, you both end up right back where you started— The Beef, face to face with the one and only, the chef your best friend long revered, Carmen fucking Berzatto. How will things resolve? Will they even resolve? | Carmy Berzatto x fem/afab reader (using they/them pronouns)

Content Tags: Nothing really! Mostly just angst. Enjoy the ending <3

Important Info: (texting) blue = Carmy

Chapter Seven: All I Ask

Word Count: 1.8k

It felt weird, helping Sydney find a new job, not going to The Beef, not hearing from Carmy. At least you had Sydney back and you could talk to Marcus... but, still, the lack of Carmy's presence left a hole in your life you didn't notice before he occupied that space.

"If you don't find anything soon, I'll help you with rent this month—"

"You don't need to do that." Sydney muttered, cutting you off.

"I know I don't need to, Syd. But I want to." You sighed, looking over at her as you kept down the sidewalk.

"You don't have to keep making things up to me. I still forgive you." She laughed softly, nudging you with her elbow.

"Oh my god! That's not why—" You groaned, then laughed a little. "Is it so wrong to want to keep my best friend on her feet?"

"I will be fine, okay?" Sydney reassured.

You responded by sticking your tongue out at her like a damn child— but, that was something you'd often done when the other wouldn't accept an offer of help.

"Real mature." She teased before sticking her tongue back at you.

You two stopped in a cafe for lunch, getting inside and away from the chill of the Chicago air. You both sat at a small table, across from each other.

"How are you doing, by the way?" She asked you softly.

You sighed softly, but forced a little smile. "Fine. I am totally fine."

"What did we say about secrets?" Syd reminded, giving you a slightly stern look.

You sighed again, and held your face in your hands for a moment while you gathered your thoughts. "Okay, I'm trying to be fine... but it's hard. I kinda fuckin' fell for the guy and it feels a bit like he stepped on my heart... it's stupid."

Sydney sighed softly, she reached over and grabbed your hand. "Your feelings are not stupid, you're allowed to just... feel. You know that."

You nodded, giving your best friend a small smile. "You're right. It's just... hard."

"I hope you know he's fuckin' stupid for saying that to you. If I knew before I left, I would've smacked the shit out of him." She reassured you, hoping to get a smile out of you.

You did smile a little wider. "Because you're the best."

That's when Sydney's phone buzzed. Carmy... that motherfucker.

"What'd he say?" You asked nervously. You hadn't felt your own phone buzz— he didn't text you.

no acid.

Your face scrunched up after Sydney showed you the text. What?

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?" You asked.

"I'm assuming something to do with the short ribs... whatever." Sydney groaned, setting her phone down as someone came to take your order.

She left Carmy on read for a while during your lunch. Though, it plagued your mind why he'd text her and not you— then your question was immediately answered, when Carmy sent her another text that her final check was waiting for her at The Beef.

You'd told the waitstaff beforehand that you'd be taking care of the check, and while Sydney protested to you that you should be splitting it, your own phone finally buzzed. Honestly, at this rate you'd thought maybe it was Marcus, hell, even Richie, or anybody else. But, no.

i'm sorry.

And that was it.

"That's it. We're going so you can get your last check and so I can give him a fucking piece of my mind." You decided, after the bill for lunch was taken care of, getting up with a huff.

"Are you sure?" Sydney asked with a little frown, following your lead and getting up herself.

"Oh, yeah. Just I'm sorry and that's it?! Who the hell does he think he is?!" You huffed, marching towards the door.

"Fucking hell..." Sydney sighed as she followed you out to the sidewalk. "What are you even gonna say to him?"

"I don't know yet! But I'll figure it out when I see his stupid fucking face!" You practically shouted.

Sydney sighed again, but followed you as you made your way down to The Beef. Of course, you legitimately had no idea what you'd actually say to Carmy, every word buzzed around your brain like fucking flies. And somehow, when you actually got to The Beef, there was nothing you could think of.

"Maybe I shouldn't go in." You muttered to Sydney as the pair of you stood at the door.

"C'mon, you're not gonna make me face him alone, are you?" She asked, nudging you gently.

You sighed deeply, but looked over at her. "No... no, I'm not gonna make you face him alone."

Both of you stared at the door for a moment. Was it an exaggeration to say that this felt like climbing Mount Everest? Probably. But, that's what it felt like right now.

Finally, you bit the bullet and opened the door, letting Sydney go in first. You had half a mind to bail and run the other fucking way— but, you knew if you did that, you'd never hear the end of it. So, you took a deep breath and followed her inside.

The sight that greeted the both of you was... unexpected, to say the least. Every single staff member with can openers, opening those damn tomato cans that he'd complained about. You kept hearing about him wondering why Mikey had gotten the smaller ones when the larger ones worked out to be cheaper.

You and Syd both met Carmy's gaze. You weren't sure if you could really read it entirely, but you did see something apologetic there— and, of course, his stupid pretty blue eyes were one of your weaknesses.

Marcus stood up, looking over at you two and held up two extra can openers.

You and Syd exchanged a glance, then set your stuff aside and silently went to help.

"Why am I even doing this? Carmy probably does not give a single shit that I'm here." You thought to yourself.

As Carmy spoke to Sydney, you stayed over by Marcus. You decided that you were doing this for Sydney and Marcus, you didn't owe Carmy a damn thing for his stupid, bullshit apology over text. You barely registered what they were talking about, you just focused on the globs of tomato you dug through to pull out wads of cash. At this point, you didn't care enough to ask why there were wads of cash wrapped in plastic and encased in tomatoes.

Well, at least opening and crushing the cans was somewhat therapeutic. You barely caught when Carmy finally spoke to you.

"Can we talk?" He muttered.

You looked up at him and shrugged a little. "I guess."

"Alone, I mean..." He said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

Oh great.

You cleaned yourself up, and went with Carmy to the office. You had half a mind to just start screaming at him, but before you could even get the chance to get a word out, he started to speak.

"I'm really sorry... about what I said. I was... in a bad mood and taking it out on everyone, including you." He confessed quietly, unable to look you in the eye. "I do like you—"

"I sense a 'but' coming." You commented.

Carmy nodded gently, finally meeting your eyes. "I do like you, but... I don't think I can be in a relationship, at least... not right now. I'm not... good at that shit."

You felt your heart break all over again. "I get it..." You muttered softly. "Um, thanks for being honest with me, though."

"That doesn't mean I don't wanna be friends, though." He told you, the tone of his voice held sincerity. "If... you forgive me, that is. Cus I wouldn't blame you if you don't."

"Did Syd forgive you?" You asked.

"Yeah, um... and we're talking about finally... opening our own place." He muttered. "And she said you could probably help."

You looked a little surprised— but, also somewhat relieved. Syd was gonna fulfill a dream of hers... wow.

"Okay... I forgive you." You said softly, looking at Carmy sincerely. "I just... all I ask, is... if anything gets too weird, being around each other... we can be honest and tell each other to fuck off, okay?"

Carmy nodded slightly in agreement, then held his hand out to you, giving you a slight smile. "Friends?"

You took a deep breath, then your hand met his for a shake. "Friends."

That fucking stung, but there wasn't a damn thing you could do about it now. If he didn't want a relationship, then he just didn't want one, simple as that— that didn't make it hurt any less, though.

You let out a soft sigh, giving Carmy one last parting kiss on the cheek... that was the one thing that seemed to render him speechless.

You both left the office, Sydney looked at you in anticipation to know about whatever had happened. But, the sadness in your eyes told her everything she needed to know.

After sharing a much needed hug with Sydney, you decided it was time to toughen up. Starting a restaurant was one of her dreams, and you knew she wanted you to be involved, you wanted to be involved. So, if that meant being just friends with Carmy, then so be it.

While the staff worked away on some spaghetti, you actually worked on a cake for everybody with Marcus, one of the things from the recipe book you'd made him.

It slowly settled over you that you would be okay, regardless of your feelings for Carmy. You could get over that... couldn't you?

"I can't believe The Beef is actually gonna close..." You muttered softly to Marcus as your cake baked. "Syd and I have... so many memories of this place from when we were younger. It's gonna be... just... weird."

"Yeah, it will be... but, I think it'll be a good thing too. Obviously the spirit of The Beef's always gonna live on here, but change can be good, yknow?" Marcus responded with a soft smile at you.

You smiled a little too. "Yeah... I guess you're right."

The cake finished baking, you and Marcus frosted and decorated it. Around the same time it was ready, everybody had the table set for family spaghetti. You were surrounded by so many people—

Sydney, your best friend. The Beef staff, including Richie and Marcus, the two men you'd grown oddly close to. Fak, who... was surprisingly allowed to join in for family. Sugar, who you liked, despite having barely gotten to know her. And Carmy... your friend.

As you all gathered to eat, you noticed Carmy hanging some cardboard in the window.

"The Beef is closed..."

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆

tags ; @maggiesarchives @carmenberzattosgf @buendiabebeta @turtle-cant-communicate

wanna be tagged in any future speechless trilogy updates? leave 🫢 + an @ to tag in my askbox !

#queue up! heard chef #mouse writes #speechless #malewife [carmy]#carmy berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x you #carmen berzatto x you #carmy berzatto x y/n #carmen berzatto x y/n #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto #carmy berzatto fic #carmen berzatto fic #carmy berzatto fanfiction #carmen berzatto fanfiction #the bear fic #the bear fanfiction

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da-rulah · 3 months

Note

Could you please do fan fic where Copia is gay or/and with a ftm(female to male) trans guy?

This has been on my mind since you requested it, and I apologise it's taken so long. Can you believe I missed out on writing this during PRIDE MONTH!? What a twat. I apologise. Usual stuff; work/life balance, writing for my big fics etc. etc but you had me at 'gay copia'. I hope you enjoy...

18+, MDNI! CW/ MxM, soft smut, comfort, gay sex, anal fingering, anal penetration, hand job, cumming inside, this is soppy as shit and I love it fight me.

OH MY GOD there's art to go with this now... Thank you so much to my incredibly talented bestie, @delulluart for this stunning pencil drawing. (Warning, it's NSFW... of course.)

Tagging my usual tag list, but if this kind of thing isn't for you, then that's absolutely fine. 💕

Do you know how tiring it is to always be in command? To always be the figure of authority? Copia does. There's no escape from it... He has no choice but to be the figurehead of the ministry, the one everybody turns to for help, for advice, for relief...

How was he ever supposed to feel relief? Who would take care of his stresses? Who would allow him the space to just let go?

Today, he practically crawls back into his chambers, just grateful to be in a place he can call his own again. No disturbances or expectations; just peace to unwind. Except, he wasn't alone. And he wouldn't have it any other way.

As soon as he shuts the door behind him, there he is; his lover, Brother Adan, stepping from the bedroom to greet him in his living space.

"Hello handsome," he smirks, his eyes soft with adoration. "I saw your schedule today, figured you may want to see me?"

He was correct; Copia very much wanted to see him.

"You always know what I want before I do, eh?" Copia chuckles, slumping back against the door. "I hope I didn't keep you waiting long..."

"You know I wouldn't mind if you did," he shrugs, walking over to Copia and wrapping his arms around his soft waist. "What do you need tonight, Papa? Cuddles and computer games, or do you need to uh... release your frustrations?"

Copia thought for a moment. He wasn't sure he had the energy, and frankly, he'd been commanding his clergy around all damn day. The last thing he wanted to do was come home and be the picture of dominance again. He wanted to be taken care of, to be reminded what it was like to let someone else take control. But in the arrangement Copia had with his Adan, they had never reversed the roles like that.

He was sure that he was capable, no doubt about that, but it just so happened that the natural roles of their situationship had made Copia the giver, and Adan the receiver. He hesitated, wondering if it might sound silly to request he give up his Papa authority for the night.

"Papa, what is it?" Adan asked, concerned. He could clearly see the inner battle going on behind his bewitching eyes.

"I... was wondering if..." Copia stutters, stumbling over his words like a fool. "If you would... maybe, eh... take control, tonight?" Adan tilts his head in question, the request sinking in.

"You mean... take care of you?" he smiles, running his fingertips through Copia's greying and overgrown hair. Copia nods meekly, unable to look him in the eye. "Oh, Copia... Don't feel any shame for that. Of course I can. You must be so tired of being in command all the time, hm?"

Copia meets his eyes, full of understanding and compassion. "Sí..."

"I'm sorry I never offered this before. You must have thought I was only happy to bottom, hm?" Adan chuckled. "I just thought that's what you wanted, but I can do both, my love." Adan moves the hand still around Copia's waist to his gloved hand, lacing his fingers with his own. "Come on, come and lay down with me."

Adan slowly leads Copia into the bedroom, gently as if guiding an exhausted gazelle to a watering hole. Copia could already feel himself sinking into a role of submission, tension beginning to drain from his shoulders from the relief of being allowed the space to fall.

Without a word, Adan sat him at the end of the bed, crouching down at his feet to remove his shoes and socks one at a time. Copia sat and watched, dumbfounded, as Adan meticulously and slowly undressed him layer by layer, until he was sat completely nude and vulnerable. Then as Adan stood upright and stepped back, he held eye contact with Copia, sweet and playful, as he too undressed himself.

"Lay back, Copia," he instructed, crawling onto the bed beside him and following until they both lay on the pillows, Copia on his back and staring innocently into Adan's eyes who lay on his side, propped up by his elbow.

Adan began to trace his fingertips over Copia's bare chest, running through the salt and pepper chest hair over his pecks and down across his stomach, only to tease as he got lower by retreating back up. Copia gulped, his bare hands balling into fists at his sides to refrain from moving. Adan didn't miss the way his cock, laying heavy and soft against his hip, had begun to fill out just from the lightest of touches.

Adan's hand travelled down the length of Copia's torso one more time, before retreating and coming to cradle his cheek and pull him towards him for a deep, slow kiss. Copia moaned immediately, gripping the sheets below him. His mind went blank, any and all stress from the day clearing out only to be replaced by fog.

As they lost themselves in their slow kiss, tongues marrying together deliciously, Adan reached his hand down one more time, finally reaching for Copia's length and palming him against his thigh. It hadn't taken long, but both men were completely erect, enjoying the sensual nature of their embrace.

As soon as Adan's hand finally wrapped around Copia's shaft, his jaw went slack, a moan rumbling from within. Adan kept kissing him, unbothered that Copia had stopped and only wanting to continue to please his Papa.

"Is this enough, my love? Or do you wish for more tonight?" he asked, wanting to give Copia the experience he needed tonight, utterly selflessly.

"Per favore, amore... will you fill me? I-It's been so long since I've felt that," he gasped, stuttering while Adan's hand worked him in long, languid strokes.

"Of course, sweet thing. Let me prep you first, hm? We can't rush this..."

"Sí, sí," Copia babbled, allowing Adan to roll him over onto his front and spread his knees just enough. Copia kept supplies in his bedside cabinet for convenience since Adan began staying the night a lot more often, and so Adan reached for the bottle of lubrication he knew he'd need.

He still lay beside Copia, wanting him to feel secure, loved and comforted by his body pressing into his, still able to deliver kisses and praises directly to Copia's ear.

He began with one finger, allowing the slick digit to circle Copia's already fluttering rim before he attempted to dip inside. Copia felt incredibly relaxed already, but with the stimulation to his hole he was struggling all the more to keep his hips still against the bed, rutting his erection into the mattress. Adan just smiled at his responsive partner, knowing he was already feeling the pleasure he'd intended.

With an extra drizzle of lubrication, Adan began to press his fingertip into Copia, slowly to accommodate the stretch that he certainly wasn't used to these days. Copia groaned in pleasure, his eyes squeezing shut as he buried half his face in the pillow below him. His paints were going to transfer to the sheets, but that was a problem for later. He needed grounding in that moment.

Adan did his best to work Copia open with just the one finger at first, eventually adding two. All the while, Copia was losing his mind at the sensation. So close to his prostate, and yet, not enough for stimulation; it was winding him up, building a knot of dull tension in his abdomen.

With some time, Adan was able to use three fingers, widening the gap for himself to fit neatly inside when the time came. Copia's groans and whines were muffled by his pillow, and yet each one travelled straight down to Adan's cock, which Copia could feel against his hip while he toyed with his hole.

"A-Adan, please..." Copia begged, professing that he was ready without having to say the words.

"Shhh, it's okay Copia. I've got you," he soothed, retracting his fingers and rolling Copia onto his side so he faced away from him. He reached for the lube again, this time coating his own length generously, before dribbling more where Copia would need him. "We'll take it slow, hm?"

"Yes, yes, just please... I need you, Adan..." Adan chuckled a little at that, sliding his palm between Copia's thighs so he could lift one and allow him the room to line his tip up with Copia's hole.

The initial stretch was uncomfortable, but not entirely unpleasant thanks to Adan's careful preparation. And still, he was gentle, giving Copia plenty of time to get used to him inch by inch. Already, Adan was becoming drunk on the gasps and moans that spilled from Copia's lips, and he couldn't help but press kisses to his neck, nipping gently at the skin whil his hands squeezed Copia's thigh in an attempt to control his own pleasures. It had been a while for Adan too, to feel the tightness of another man around him. Fuck, how he missed it...

Copia gained some confidence, rocking his hips back into Adan's and reaching his arm back to hold his hips in place to bounce against. Adan groaned against Copia's shoulder, losing himself to the passion of the moment too.

After a little while, he could take it no longer, rolling Copia to have his back pressed to his chest and sitting himself up enough to grip tightly onto the back of Copia's neck, pulling him in for a deep kiss as he pistoned his hips deep into him. Copia lifted his leg for a better angle, wrapping his own arm around Adan's bicep and holding on tightly as he groaned into the kiss, each thrust audibly stuttering his moans.

The pair were completely wrapped up in each other, losing themselves together. Adan's grip on Copia's neck tightened, before dropping down to press into Copia's stomach and digging his fingertips into the softness of his belly. Fucking hell, Adan loved his body, soft and warm in his grip. He could feel the way his stomach turned into rolls each time he thrusted into him, Copia curling up tightly each time.

With every upward thrust, Copia's prostate was throbbing with pleasure, his cock bouncing from the force of Adan's movements and aching from the lack of contact. He could only whine at the feeling of being so close, so fucking close, that he thought his entire body was about to burst.

He wanted to beg, to plead, to tell Adan how much he adored him, how much he needed this but just the thought of parting their heated kiss as he fucked into him was regretful. but it was Adan who parted first, grunting and growling in a way Copia rarely heard from him. He was about to cum deep inside his Papa, unable to stop himself and so his pace picked up, determined to finish Copia off before himself.

He reached his hand down to wrap his deft fingers around Copia's shaft, beginning to pump him to completion while he hammered into his prostate. Copia cried out, his nails digging into Adan's arm as his eyes rolled back into his head and his body lost it's fight to stay composed. Copia's cock jerked in Adan's hand, thick ropes of warm cum erupting onto his own stomach with the last remnants dribbling down Adan's fist. The sight and sound alone was enough to finish Adan off, his rhythm falling off as he shot his own load deep inside Copia.

Adan stilled, enjoying the last few minutes of connection sheathed inside Copia's warmth as the two of them came down from their highs, heavy breaths and gentle whimpers filling the silence. Copia's eyes fluttered open, searching Adan's who seemed to be doing the same - asking a silent question, or confessing a silent thought.

"I think... I think I am I love with you, Adan..." Copia whispered, losing his confidence the moment he uttered a syllable. Neither of them had expected something quite this serious when their arrangement began, but there was no denying the electricity between them.

Adan just grinned, once again holding Copia close to him by the back of his neck, his fingers playing with the sweat dampened locks of hair at the nape.

"And it would seem, Papa, I'm in love with you too," he admitted, not a moment of hesitation now he knew where Copia was too. The two men shared a soft kiss, longing for one another as if they weren't as close as could possibly be right then.

"I suggest a nice, soothing, hot bath to recover, hm? Let the stress just melt away, together?" Adan proposed, stroking the hair from Copia's forehead. He could only nod in response, too tired and drunk on him to form words. "I'll be right back, my love."

With a kiss to the tip of Copia's barely painted nose, Adan gently removed himself from his side and made his way into the bathroom to run a hot bath filled with salts and essential oils to soothe his poor Papa's body and mind.

The two of them spent the evening in the bath together, Copia enveloped in the warmth of the water and his lover behind him. He'd never been so cared for, so loved by another than he was with Adan around. Suddenly, the burden of being Papa didn't feel quite so heavy anymore...

#ghost bc #the band ghost #ghost band #the band ghost fanfic #ghost #cardinal copia #ghost the band #papa emeritus iv #da rulah writes #copia #cardinal copia x reader smut #cardinal copia smut #copia smut #papa emeritus iv smut #papa copia smut

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calistrae · 2 years

Text

silent treatment. jude bellingham

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

pairing: jude bellingham x gn!reader

warnings: silent treatment, cold!jude

summary: jude after a bad match can be quite different from his usual self

notes: my first time writing something, don't be too harsh pls lol

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

what started off as a great match was gradually going downhill. it was dortmund against bayern and up until the 54th minute, dortmund was in the lead with two goals, one of them scored by your boyfriend of three months.

you loved to watch him on the field - his determination to bring the win to his team was admirable. especially today. it seemed he was set on winning, his chestnut eyes flaming with dedication. having only been dating for three months, it was your very first time coming to his game and everything seemed to be going as both you and him hoped for. well, until it wasn't.

bayern caught up and you could see jude getting more and more frustrated as the time ticked. you were on the edge of your seat as you watched intensely, not tearing your eyes off the game for a second. you swore you could feel your heart drop into the pit of your stomach when bayern scored their third goal of the night. seeing as jude's jaw clenched while his eyes narrowed as the team had to admit their defeat, you couldn't help but feel sorry for him. he had worked so hard the entire game and you knew he was probably beating himself up over this. nonetheless, you were proud of him. but it was evident he was not proud of himself, whatsoever.

while jude was still showering, you waited out in the halls of the arena, entertaining yourself on your phone. it didn't take too long for him to walk out, his duffel bag on his shoulder. "hi" you greeted and attempted to press a kiss to his cheek, but to your surprise, he pulled back. in your attempt to lighten his mood at least a little bit, you gave him a gentle smile "you did well, proud of you, darling." but he was not having it. he huffed and stuck his hands into his pockets " 't was shit. don't bloody sugarcoat it." he barked back.

you were taken aback by the way he spoke to you. you had never heard him snap like that, not off the field at least. you brushed it off, heading towards your car. of course there were fans on the parking lot, waiting for jude and he did his best to put up a nice smile for them, but you could tell he wanted to get away as quickly as humanly possible. as soon as he got in, you began the drive back to his place. the whole car ride was silent, you had tried to catch his attention by attempting to place your hand on his thigh or trying to spark a conversation but he remained nonchalant, even cold. it wasn't like jude and you didn't quite know how to react.

the energy in the car was full of negativity, anger practically radiating off your boyfriend while the air felt tense. if you had a choice, you would've walked out of the vehicle minutes ago. he seemed to be withdrawn from anything but even as time passed, his jaw remained clenched, his left hand balled up into a fist. his eyes weren't warm and inviting as usual, they were dark, distant almost. while you understood, why he was unhappy, he was genuinely scaring you on some level.

"do you still want me to come over to yours, love?" you questioned as you pulled up to his driveway and put the car on park. you looked towards him when you received silence as an answer and you couldn't help but scoff. "look, i'm sorry you lost. i understand you're mad but i'm not going to be your scapegoat. i don't expect you to be in the mood for kisses and cuddles and all that, but i need an answer to know if i should stay or head home."

"come on, then" the footballer shrugged and you allowed a sigh to leave your lips before you followed him into the house. were you supposed to be more understanding? you feared so. at the same time, you were getting a little worked up yourself but you decided it would be best to give him some space. so while he was lounging on the sofa, you settled on making him a cup of tea to help him relax a little. you made it exactly how he liked - with a little bit of milk and sugar. as quiet as a mouse, you placed the steaming beverage on the coffee table before settling on the armchair across the room.

with a book in hand, you paid no mind to your boyfriend as you decided it'd be better to allow him to come to you. whenever he decided the right time was. although you didn't enjoy the way he was behaving, you understood him regardless. it was a big game after all. and god, did he feel like shit.

he blamed it on himself mainly. believing he should've done more, should've been better. if only he hadn't allowed one of the bayern guys to tackle him and if only he had tried harder. but worse were the embarrassment and shame he felt. he had invited you, a person he adored, to watch him play and you had to witness him fail. that was the worst bit of it all. it made his skin crawl with anger and disappointment towards himself. losing was a normal part of his job, but losing in front of someone he wanted to prove himself to, was so much worse. that's why he couldn't even look at you properly but he knew he couldn't keep treating you like this. it was unfair. it wasn't you that he should be punishing with a childish silent treatment.

"i'm sorry."

you lifted your eyes from the book in your hand when you heard jude speak up from the couch but instead of responding verbally, you just hummed in question.

"i'm sorry for how i've been acting. jus' felt embarrassed." he admitted and you could see him fiddle his fingers nervously. "wanted to impress you but clearly, i failed. i was furious at myself, but i shouldn't have made you have to deal wit' it."

you nodded slowly as you listened and raised your eyebrow "wanted to impress me? love, we're dating. i think i've seen plenty of things that have left me impressed." your voice took a much more playful tone.

jude's face brightened in an instant and even a small smile appeared. however, he made no effort to sit up or change his position. the bitterness wasn't entirely gone, but he seemed to be talking to you again, which was a relief. you knew better than to jump onto him so you settled for the armchair for now. but let's just say it didn't take long for him to plead you to move onto his lap.

#jude bellingham #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham x you #football #fluff #angst #footballer #world cup #trent alexander arnold #trent alexander arnold x reader #jude bellingham imagine #football one shot #football imagine #borussia dortmund #jude bellingham one shot #jb22 #bellingham

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dashofmonsters · 4 months

Text

Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 7

merman x female reader

"Would you like to move in with me then?" Tao asks.

You gape at him in disbelief of what just came out of his mouth before shaking your head, "Wait a second, wait a second... You'd be ok with me living with you?"

"Yes, that's why I asked." Tao confirms.

"Because you know if I agree to this and I move out of my grandmother's, she won't take me back and I can't afford rent in this area even with a double shift at the diner and all," you wave your hand about as you rant your concerns.

Tao nods and reaches for your hands, "You can stay here if you want. I would never, could never abandon a shoal mate."

You know he's being sincere, know that he'd never kick you out or leave you behind. But you're also scared, scared of these feelings that you have for him. He's your friend and you trust him so much that it hurts sometimes.

You want to jump up and say yes a million times over but there's this part of your heart that weeps at the idea of growing closer to someone you've decided is off limits. It would be torturous to stay with him, to be any closer than what you'd allow.

"Let me... let me think about it ok?" you finally say, poking the remnants of your cake slice.

"Oh... uh Of course," Tao stutters, sounding unusually shocked. "It's a big decision, I understand"

"Yup, for sure." you shove the piece of cake in your mouth and try and think of something else to talk about but nothing comes to mind.

There's a stretch of awkward silence that Tao eventually breaks when he takes a sip of coffee and nearly chokes on it. You jump down out of your seat to check up on him but he laughs it off. You can't help but to notice he's a bit dry to the touch, his usually moist and slightly leathery skin feels a bit scratchy.

"Tao, buddy, I think your overdue for a jump into your tank." you poke his arm and he looks down at it with a grimace.

He quickly hides his arm behind his back, his pointed ears have flattened like that of a cat's and he's backed away from me a good few feet.

"Should I not have mentioned that you need to rehydrate? Is that some cultural thing?" you ask.

Tao looks to the hatch and then at the floor and then the closet and then basically anywhere that's not you. He looks visibly uncomfortable and like he might run off at any second.

"Dude, you gotta talk to me or else I'm not sure what to do here." You sigh.

Without looking at you he nods and groans, "It is a cultural thing and it is a bit embarrassing to my kind... I am well hydrated, I just uhh missed a spot when I was scrapping off my dead skin..."

"Ok, no big deal then. Easily fixable right?" you smile at him, hoping that it'll help him be less uncomfortable but he still looks like he's ready to sprint.

"It is indeed a very big deal my friend, please excuse me." Tao dashes off and kicks the hatch open, and before you can say his name he's plunged right in. Water splashes up and around the living room floor and you're left alone.

The house in quiet once more but less awkward. Now that he's gone into the tank you're left alone with your thoughts and you're not quite liking them. If you had your phone you'd be texting Jess all about this, hoping for some sound advice. For the first time in a long time though, you're absolutely alone.

So you do the one thing that's always taken your mind off of anything and start cleaning.

You knew Tao's tiny beach house like the back of your hand since it's a pretty finite space and well organized. Usually he keeps his home spotless but since he rescued you he hasn't been paying much attention to keeping up with his house.

Lucky me, you think as you riffle through the cubbies of cleaning supplies under his kitchen sink.

Tao buddy, your house is about to be attacked by anxiety induced cleaning.

You attack the kitchen first, getting into every nook and cranny you can. At some point you get inventive in order to get the hard to reach spots as intrusive thoughts creep in here and there. A full hour passes and though your fingers are now wrinkled from being damp and your back sore from bending over in ways you weren't meant to, you continue on.

It's not till one of your wounds opens and blood drips that you realized you went a little too hard too soon. You groan and clean the spot off before holding a wad of folded paper towels over it. A makeshift bandage till you can find one of Tao's many first aid kits.

You look under the sink and in the pantry but you don't see high nor low of any band aids or antibiotic ointment. You run down the hall to the bathroom hoping you'll find one in there when you start to feel dizzy. You look down and see that the paper towel is almost all red.

Well that's not fucking good...

You're not one of those people who faint at the sight of blood but for some reason you've never been too ok with seeing a lot of yours exiting your body like this. You do your best to continue your search with shaky hands and a calm mind but your anxiety has other ideas.

Your vision blurs as tears sting the corners of your eyes and you do your best to hold back the pathetic whimpering but you crumple in front of the bathtub and cry as you hold onto your wound.

A small part of you hopes Tao won't find you like this and that you'll be passed out already but the larger part of you is hoping he'll get his tall merman ass over to you ASAP.

In desperation you remove the shirt you borrowed from Tao and start to wrap your arm with it but your hands are too shaky. You curse and cry and then gasp as you feel yourself being lifted up. You don't have it in you to protest until the cold water of the tub makes you yelp.

A soothing hand holds your shaking arm still as the stinging effects of the healing potion bubble along the wound.

"I should have warned you that this only acts as a temporary fix but doesn't completely heal the wound unless you use it a few times a day," Tao rubs his thumb against your hand, his voice is filled with remorse and worry.

All you can do is nod as you attempt to curl your body into a ball, both out of embarrassment for being pretty much naked in front of Tao and ashamed that he's seen you in this crumbled state. Being pathetic from nearly dying out at sea is one thing but being pathetic because you can't handle the sight of your own blood is another thing entirely, at least to you it is.

"You've lost even more blood, you must be exhausted..." His hand slowly leaves yours and pats your shoulder. "I'll be back with a towel and then I'll take you to my nest. Try and get some rest tonight."

Without meaning to, you start sobbing. You're completely inconsolable as you cry into your hands. You feel childish and Tao makes it even worse as he scoops you up into a towel a wraps you up. He holds you close as if you mean the world to him so you cry against his chest. You're a shaking shivering wet hot mess who is crying so hard in the arms of her crush that she starts falling asleep.

Your eyes sting with the salt of your tears and your throat aches from crying but you feel at peace. Like you can finally sleep without having to worry about getting you ass beaten for no fucking reason. You don't feel scared or on edge.

Suddenly the heat from Tao's body is missing and is replaced with a large comforter. He tucks you in and you whimper. He soothes his hand against your cheek and you turn into it and cry some more. You haven't felt this safe in a long long time nor this amount of pain and agony.

You hate to admit it, but you really like Tao... no, you're in love with him and this is going to fucking hurt.

~~~~~~

Your soul nearly jumps out of your body when you wake up to the loud clap of thunder. You jolt up and gasp as you look around in the dimly lit nest room. Your heart is beating a mile a minute and then it nearly stops when a very large hand plops onto your shoulder. It takes you a moment to realize that it's Tao's arm.

It takes you less time then that to realize that you're naked and Tao's large arm is across your body and rubbing up against your chest.

Tao groans and turns up against you as his hand slowly roves down to your hip, pulling you down until he's spooning you. And then, he begins to purr. His large cold hands absent mindlessly roam until one settles on your hip and the other on your shoulder. His mouth is dangerously clothes to your ear and his um... um...

Your mind goes blank because you've dated and you know what morning wood feels like and this... uh... he's either got a very big package or he got two very good size packages.

Right now, you feel as if you're both in heaven and hell being wrapped up in the arms of the merman you've finally admitted to yourself that you're in love with. Unfortunately, he'll regret this because you're not his mate.

You allow this to go on for a few more moments before you start wiggling out of his arms as carefully as you can before locating something you can wrap yourself up in.

With your now strapless blanket dress on you decide to tip toe to the kitchen for a quick midnight snack. You find the soup that Tao had made for you and toss it in the microwave while munching on some chips. Thoughts of the day and years past start to rear their ugly head as you stare at the spinning bowl. All your worst fears and nightmares circling around. You've told yourself you're not meant for love for so many years because if you were no one would have betrayed or left you.

And that's why you hate how fast you fell for Tao. You know he won't betray you or leave you without a damn good reason. He's been blunt and brutally honest with you to the point that it hurts sometimes. You trust him so much and feel so safe with him that it scares the shit out of you.

The soup pops in the microwave snapping you from your deep dark thoughts. You quickly clean up the mess while trying not to burn yourself on the hot bowl. You stir the lukewarm contents before shoving it back into the microwave, this time covered up.

You sigh and turn to head towards the fridge but end up bumping right into the rock hard chest of your heart's tormentor.

Like a bumbling idiot you jump back and nearly trip yourself up in the saddest attempts to gain composure. You obviously failed.

Tao sort of catches you, sort of pins you against the counter. Either way, you're both flustered and awkward.

"I uh... are you well enough to be walking around?" Tao asks as he helps you straighten up.

"Oh um yeah, just a little sore. Mostly hungry," you shrug and nod towards the microwave.

Tao nods his head and for the first time you notice that his eyes are all black. Not a single fleck of gold in them.

"Did you come out here for a snack too?" you ask as you start towards the fridge again.

You barely make it past Tao when he hoists you up in his arms and walks you to one of the bar stools.

"Oh come on, I'm not that bad off," you groan as he sets you down.

He glares daggers at you and frowns, "Need I remind you that you're still healing and that your wounds are only temporarily closed."

You want to joke or make some kind of snide remark but the incident is still fresh so you end up just curling into yourself. You gently clutch your sore and bruised arm and turn away from Tao.

Tao's fingers brush against your arm but quick retract when the microwave goes off. He takes the soup out and sets it front of you before going back to grab some rolls and pour you a glass of water.

You stare blankly at your food, your stomach sinking and appetite disappearing. You fidget with your fingers as your eyes start to blur from the heaviness in your chest.

Tao tries to reach out to hold you but you dodge his arms and slide off the chair. You're breathing is a little labored as you crumple to the floor. You needed more time before seeing him again, needed more time to compose yourself so you can continue lying to yourself.

You hear Tao talking a mile a minute, panic in his voice but once again his words are lost on you. You feel him get close so you scramble back, putting some dramatic distance between the two of you.

"Why are you running from me!?" he yells, the panic having evolved to pure distress and confusion. His black eyes are wide and his usually well kept hair is a mess and sticking to his face.

The bottle holding your years and years of pent up emotions finally shatters and without warning you cry out every frustration, every bold face lie you told to keep yourself safe, and every terror you've ever faced.

At some point you jolt up and start pacing circles like a mad woman, ranting and raving about your family, your jobs, your school, basically your whole damn life. You've told Tao bits and pieces but never the whole damn story.

You never told him that you almost died from starvation thanks to your estranged mother's fairy magic drug habits. You never told him how the girls in high school would lock you in the school over the weekends. You never told him or anyone how many times you had to lie, cheat and steal to keep your siblings fed since working in fast food hardly paid enough.

"The worst part is that I thought I finally fucking escaped my shitty ass family only to get tormented by my own grandmother on a daily fucking basis!" You shout, your chest heaving and your eyes now dried and crusted. "Who fucking tells their grandkid that their an overweight piece of shit? Who fucking does that?!"

It was a matter you used to joke about, something that you'd act like it didn't bother you but the truth is that it always got under your skin. You hardly got to eat anything decent growing up and now that you're all grown up you get to eat whenever and whatever you damn well please. It's not like you gorge yourself, but no one, especially your grandmother, should have any fucking say in your weight.

Tao slowly walks till he's right in front of you before crouching down. His hand slides against your cheek and he whispers some sort of spell that soothes the ache in your eyes. You crumble into his arms, truly exhausted now. He gently kisses your forehead before carefully lifting you up.

"You're safe here, you can rest," he tells you, his voice cracking.

You nuzzle up against him and his hold on you tightens. You always felt safe with him, it was an immediate thing. Like the second you met him you had this feeling deep down that you knew you could trust him.

Little by little you drift in and out as he walks you back to his nest room and tucks you back in. You feel him hovering over you before he leans in to kiss your cheek and then your nose. He slowly peppers your face in gentle and soft kisses expect he never kisses your lips. You can't help but to laugh before you sit up just enough so you can quickly steal a kiss from him.

It was meant to be a quick kiss goodnight before you pass out but that low rumble you hear from Tao catches you off guard and you get lost in the moment. He leans into you, holding you close. One kiss turns to two, turns to three and before you know he's lowering you back into his nest, lips still locked.

His large hand cups your face and you feel your heart pounding like crazy as your face heats up. You and Tao have kissed before, but not like this. He's kissing you like he actually likes you, and more than just a friend. He's kissing you like...

You turn your face from him and fake a yawn, "Oh god, sorry... I'm just-"

"Get some sleep," He kisses your cheek and sits up. "We'll talk in the morning."

You smile at him as he gets up and heads to the door. He nervously mentions that he's really dehydrated and it might be a bit before he comes up for air tomorrow. You wave him off and tell him goodnight before rolling yourself up into a ball of blankets and woe.

"I really fucked up..." you grumble as you clutch at your heart.

~~~~~~

Tao:

I really fucked up, I think.

I allowed myself to get caught up in my emotions and fell into her arms. I haven't even told her how I feel nor have I given her the space to heal.

Gods and goddesses I am the absolute worst.

I lament myself as I droop over a pile of rocks. I knew she had a tough upbringing and has issues with he family but I never realized just how much she was hiding. How long has she been suffering on her on?

She laid herself bare, screaming in agony of every sad story no one probably ever cared enough to listen to.

My heart bleeds for her, truly. For I know what it means to be alone in that regards. I had started opening up to her little by little. I never felt compelled to talk about myself but with her I feel safe enough to do so.

Suddenly my heart stops and I realize that's why she ranted for hours on end now.

She feels safe with me.

I start cursing myself in a similar fashion to my... my shoal mate.

The neutral tasting words leave behind a numb sensation. I can no longer call her my friend in private. It just tastes too awful. I can call her my shoal mate, it's a honest statement but it's still further from the truth.

When I held her earlier as she laid in my arms fast asleep I felt this need to protect her. It was similar to how I felt compelled to protect my shoal back home but there was more to it. I was anxious and every little creek or shuddering of the house had me on the edge. It wasn't until she rolled over and curled into me that I started calming down.

I started thinking long and hard about how to approach her once she was well and fully healed. I want to ask her if I could court her, tell her that it doesn't matter if we're not fated mates that my heart has chosen her. I want her as my mate and I can only hope she feels the same way.

But all that will have to wait a little while longer. She has more than just the physical wounds I must worry about. She needs to heal from the years of pain this world has wrought upon her.

I know she hasn't answered me on moving in but for her safety I will greatly insist. She cannot begin to heal properly if she's under the constant scrutiny of a woman who feigns love and concern.

I close my eyes and slowly doze off as I start planning her move and how she'd be living here and getting to work.

~~~~~~

Your everything hurts when you wake up. You somehow someway rolled into the corner of the nest room and woke up with your body curled in a way it shouldn't. You're well and tangled up in your blanket dress and something sort of sharp has left an imprint on your leg.

Ever so elegantly you toss around till you're free of your bindings and dig around for the object that left a deep dent in your thigh. When you finally find it you nearly drop it from shock. It's the crown your wore when you and Tao were dancing on the cliff. You remember leaving it here so your grandmother wouldn't ask you a million questions or worse, throw it away...

But why's it in here?

Maybe he meant to put it up somewhere safe and accidentally sort of just left it lying around, you think before quickly dismissing the thought. That wouldn't be very Tao of him.

You wrack you brain for a moment longer before you hear a knock. Turning your attention to the open doorway you see Tao's hand tossing a bag towards you.

"I woke up early this morning and it seems like the storm has mostly cleared up. I uh... I hope those are the right size," he clears his throat before excusing himself to the kitchen.

You scramble towards the bag and pull out the shirts, dresses, and pants and stare at them stunned. These were all designer brands and they all looked like they'd fit you perfectly. You want to try them all on, only problem is that you kinda wish you had some undergarments.

Picking up the bag to set it aside you feel that there's still some weight to it and see a couple of thin black boxes in there. You roll your eyes hoping that there's not over priced accessories in them or you'll have to chew Tao out for unnecessary spending.

When you open the first box your jaw drops and you feel your eyes widen to what it probably a cartoonish size. In the first black box was a set of grey and black lacy under things that looks like they'd fit like a dream. That being said, you quickly check the other box and see a black and blue set with a gold little details on it.

Your brain short circuits because both of the sets are Tao's colors. For a moment you start thinking that there's some weird hidden message here but knowing Tao who is straight forward you quickly abandon that thought. He probably just asked for help or something and they picked out sets based off of his colors thinking it's a gift for his girlfriend or some shit, you reason with yourself.

Feeling a bit more settled knowing that Tao would never gift you lingerie in his colors you set to trying on the black and blue one. As you thought, it fits perfectly. You toss on a simple light grey shirt and shimmy into a pair of blue jeans before gathering all the clothes he had gifted you into a neat folded pile.

You trot to the bathroom first before heading to the kitchen when you get the silly idea to go back to the nest room and put your crown on. You quickly settle in on your head and tip toe to the kitchen. You see Tao chopping something up but he quickly stops like he knows you're there.

"Did anything in that bag f-" He stops talking the second he turns around and his eyes widen and mouth straightens like he got caught doing something wrong.

You wave your hand at him, "Earth to Tao, you good buddy?"

He shakes his head and runs his claws through his hair before promptly returning to the chopping block, "Just fine... I uh see you found something to wear in all of that."

"Oh yeah, thank you by the way." You smile as you walk up to his side. "What are you working on?"

"I'm trying my hand at pastries. I gave up too soon the first time so I thought I'd try again," he shrugs, continuing his chopping of what looks like pistachios. "Oh and I... I made you some breakfast, it's on the bar."

You look up and see a crazy ass spread of every breakfast food imaginable. Part of you is confused but your stomach could care less about you being confused because you're hungry ass hell.

Circling around the counter, you make a jump start to the barstool and stick the landing as you grab at waffle and take a quick bite.

"Oh by the way," you pause to swallow. "You should return some of those clothes."

Tao stutters his knife and nearly slices a finger, "Did they not fit?"

"No, they all look like they'll fit perfectly it's just that they're high end brands... You shouldn't have to pay that much money for clothes. Like, I appreciate it, don't get me wrong... But this is too much," you look down and feel a bit of guilt for almost readily accepting these gifts.

You hear Tao chuckle and look up to see him shaking his head, "Believe it or not, I know what designer brands are. I bought those for you on purpose, no one ripped me off, and yes, I can afford to spend like this ever so often."

"But-"

"I'm not returning them," he looks down and swipes the chopped nuts into a bowl on the side.

You mutter something about how he should save that sort of thing for his mate and you swear you hear him grind his teeth. You quickly dig into your breakfast as you try to ignore the strange tension in the room. You notice Tao is acting a little off, not just with the clothes and breakfast but with his entire demeanor.

He seems more stern with you than usual and a bit more attentive than you care for. Your glass is empty for hardly a minute before he refills it with juice but somehow avoids looking in your general direction.

You try to ignore it but it's bothering you way to much, "Tao, buddy, are you ok?"

Tao turns and before he says anything you hold up your hand, "Because you've been acting really weird since I got up and please don't tell me this is because I trauma dumped on you yester because if it i-"

"It is, and it isn't," He admits and sighs as he tosses down a towel he was using to wipe off the counter.

"So what's wrong then? Are you mad at me? Annoyed? Is this... is this a pity thing? Oh gods please tell me this isn't a pity thing..." you start to panic and sprint out of the stool to the nest room.

Gifts are one thing but pity gifts piss you the fuck off.

Tao catches you before you make it past the bar and holds you in place, "I did none of this out of pity! I would never do something like that to you, I only wanted you to feel comfortable and provide you with the clothes of your own."

You feel yourself tensing, not used to others giving a rat's ass about your comfort without some sort of strings attached... But this is Tao, there wouldn't be a 'but' or 'however' or 'you owe me' added to his gifts and if he says he doesn't pity you then he doesn't pity you. Simple as that. Right?

"It just feels wrong somehow... I don't know why but it does," you slump. "Like I'm not worth the trouble of doing all this stuff for or getting really nice gifts."

"And who said that you're not worth it?" He crouches down in front of you, still holding your arms. His gold eyes search your face as he brings a hand up to cup your cheek. "Was it the girls who harassed their starving classmate? The mother who got high while her children suffered? Or the grandmother who shamed her granddaughter while she's healing? Because not a single one of those imbecilic curs has any room to speak of your worth nor judge you."

You feel your knees buckle and your eyes blur, "How can I be worth anything though? If I was, none of that would have happened to me, right?"

Tao shakes his head, "Your life isn't defined by your worth. You are not a commodity or currency but a person."

That's something you've always tried to tell yourself after moving away but it never felt real, never stuck its landing. But hearing Tao say it, verify that he knows there's more to you than what you can bring to the table just somehow settles you.

You fling yourself at him and give him the biggest hug you can manage that he quickly reciprocates. For the first time in forever, you feel seen. You feel safe.

"Hey Tao, buddy? If it's my day off you better let me sleep in." you laugh as you pull away, wiping the tears out of your eyes.

Tao sighs in relief and smiles, "So you'll move in?"

You smile back and nod, "I guess I should, I don't think I can go back to that hellhole."

"Thank the goddesses! I was trying to think how I should convince you to stay." He nervously laughs as he stands up,

"Honestly dude the breakfast kind of helped." you jokingly pat your stomach and he arches a brow at you.

"Really?" he tilts his head.

"Listen I was convinced when I woke up, breakfast just sealed the deal man. I'm a foodie!" You give him a silly pose and laugh.

"Oh I am going to regret some of this aren't I?" He rolls his eyes but smiles all the same.

"No takesies backsies." you grin.

"Wouldn't dream of it." Tao says and takes your.

#monster boyfriend #monster x girl #monster x human #monster x reader #monster lover #merman #Tao the merman #merman x reader #monster romance #merman boyfriend #monster love #merman x female reader #monster boyfriend oc #monster bf #slow burn #slow burn romance

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utterlyotterlyx · 5 months

Text

When I Became a Believer

Azriel Fem!Reader

Part Four

Summary - After dancing under the stars, you wake up and find yourself reuniting with a male you never thought you'd encounter again. Though, lurking fragments of your past life in Spring rear their ugly heads and you find that a certain someone isn't ready to let you live happily ever after.

Warnings - fluff, old friends reuniting, some angst, mentions of past trauma, slight ptsd themes.

Part four of the 'When I Kissed The Teacher' series - sorry it's taken so long! My inspiration has been very Eris driven recently.

Part One - When I Kissed the Teacher

Part Two - When I Met The Devil

Part Three - When I Danced Under The Stars

The warmth of the sunlight drifting through the slightly ajar curtains wasn't the thing that woke you that morning.

No.

It was Azriel's strong arm flung over your side which awoke you, more like made you jump from your skin at the groggy half-asleep haze you'd awoken to. The bed you lay in was usually yours alone, and it had been an extremely long time since you had allowed anyone into that space, since you had allowed someone to hold you.

Azriel was shirtless, clad in a black pair of loose cotton pants and little else, he lay on his front with his wings tucked back, your bed wasn't made to accommodate the Illyrian wingspan, and you frowned softly when you realised just how uncomfortable he must have been.

As if they had sensed you, his shadows danced over his shoulders and down his arm, peppering your face in sweet kisses as they coiled over your cheeks, one of them slithered backward and you watched it with a soft smile as it hovered by his ear. A lazy smirk fell on his lips and his voice called to you, as rough and warm as whisky, "You're staring."

"I can't help it," he squeezed the skin beneath your clothed him, you were drowned in a sheer lilac nightgown, and Azriel shuffled your positions so that his wings go stretch out a little, pulling you into his side and curling his wing around you, "I'm sorry for the bed, I know it's not exactly the best size for your wings."

Azriel hummed, eyes still half-closed, sunlight streaking over the right side of his face, "It doesn't bother me," he craned his neck to peer down on you, his eyelids blinking slowly as they adjusted and began to wake, "It was perhaps the most peaceful sleep I've had for awhile."

Tracing small shapes on his taut and exposed chest, you asked, "Really?"

"Really," his calloused fingers entwined themselves in your own, and he lifted your hand to his lips, kissing your knuckles softly, "How are you feeling?"

It was a question that you didn't really know how to answer, but you tried, "I'm okay. Part of me is still shaken up from seeing him, I think it'll take some time to believe that he's not going to do something to me. I just wasn't ready to remember it all so suddenly, I suppose."

Azriel had made it very clear that you needn't tell him about the details of your life before Velaris, not if you didn't want to, and if you never did, Azriel was also at peace with that. The past life you had lived did not define you, your home court and family name did not define you, what defined you was what shone through the cracks in the darkness, the kindness and unwavering loyalty and irrevocable devotion to his family.

"I understand," his shadows floated over you, almost embracing you themselves, and Azriel made no move to pull them away, "If you're reconsidering meeting with Lucien, if you're not ready, then you don't have to see him."

Shaking your head, you sighed, "No. It's been so long," you looked to him through your lashes and sent him a reassuring smile, "Lucien saved my life, and I never had to chance to really thank him before he threw me on that horse and sent me away."

There was no reality that existed where you would ever say no to reuniting with Lucien, the male who kept you sane and made you feel seen and heard, the only male in your life at that point who had refused to stand by and watch the torture unfold.

Azriel pressed his lips to your forehead, his fingers caressing the side of your face as he pulled you closer into his side, wrapping both of his arms around you and relishing in the contact of your warmth and light, "I'll go and get us breakfast," he mumbled into your hair, letting his lips trail downward until they caught yours in a quick but tender kiss, a fleeting thing that felt natural.

You whimpered as he pulled himself from the bed, flexing his wings and rolling his neck, to pop the stiffness from them. Gazing back at you, he smirked, leaning over the side of the bed and kissing you again, humming against your lips before pulling back slightly, "I could get used to this."

"What?" Your fingers trailed along the curve of his jaw and his eyes bore into yours.

"Waking up next to you," the tip of his nose sloped down your own and then he pulled away entirely, tugging a shirt over his chest that he must have gone to retrieve once he had put your sleeping body to bed the night before, "Have a bath, I'll be back soon."

The silence yearned for him to return, but you waited a few moments before rising, the warmth of the sun washed over you through the fully opened curtains which illuminated your entire room, a room that held the mingled scents of you and Azriel. It wrapped the space in an ethereal, untouchable shield of sorts.

Laughter echoed from beyond the window and you took minute to appreciate it all, the looming mountains that had kept you hidden from the moment you had stepped into Velaris from Hewn City, the gardens and fields that were littered in every space possible, birthing life and beauty, and you bowed to the notion that perhaps you were safe, that Velaris was your home and you belonged there.

Though, as you peered at your own garden, expecting to see the array of blush pink and lilac tulips swaying in the wind, you frowned as your eye caught something out of place. A single tulip with petals of burgundy. To anyone else it would represent love, to anyone else, it wouldn't mean anything at all.

But you were from Spring, and you knew flowers. In all of the time you spent locked up at that manor playing pet to Tamlin, you had learnt every meaning of every beautiful flower in existence, he knew that.

That's why the sight of those blood-red petals made your heart flutter. It was a warning, an angry warning of the wrath you would face. That flower wasn't what unsettled you though, it was the fact that it had been so delicately placed in the garden of your home, like he was taunting you, telling you that he knew where you were.

You wished you could have laughed it off like it was a silly thing of nothingness, you knew anyone else would. So, you gobbled it down and supressed that fleeting feeling telling you to run as far and as fats as your legs could carry you. Azriel would protect you.

Right?

It had taken buckets full of courage to leave the confinements of your home, half of you didn't want to step outside, the image of that lone red tulip swaying in a different direction than the rest playing on a constant in your mind.

But Lucien was waiting for you.

Rhys had arranged it, the meeting at the River House, a much more informal abode compared to that of the House of Wind. Calling it a meeting alone was too formal for you to handle, what would you call two friends reuniting after such a time apart? Not a meeting, that was for sure.

Exhaling shakily, you couldn't bring yourself to move from the foot of the path, the last time you had been there you had seen him, and you couldn't be completely sure he wouldn't be there waiting for you again.

Sensing your doubt, Azriel laced his fingers with yours, and offered a soft smile, one that you couldn't quite return, "We can leave," he told you, he had watched you get ready, he had watched you change your outfit seven times until you settled on a pale blue sun dress with puffy sleeves and a white lace corset moulded into the bodice.

He had told you that you looked beautiful and breath-taking, and you had merely muttered a small thank you before taking his outstretched hand. Azriel noticed your clammy palms, he didn't move away from you as your free hand clasped around his bicep, using him as a crutch.

"No. I'm okay. Just give me a second," you squeezed your eyes closed, taking a moment to steady your breath and work up the courage to enter the home and live the dream you had always drifted to, "Okay," you opened your eyes and glanced upward at him through your lashes, "I'm ready."

The path seemed to widen as you strode up the cobbled stone, the windows brightened at your approach, and you could faintly see, and hear, Lucien chatting away within the home. He hadn't changed one bit, a blessing really considering what Tamlin could have done to him if he had known that Lucien was the catalyst of your disappearance.

Faltering slightly, you stopped at the door, not knowing whether it was rude or not to just walk in, and Azriel let you decide what would be best. The door vibrated under your curled fist, three curt knocks sounded on the wood, and you took a step back and waited.

Velaris had been shrouded by the heatwave that had drifted up from the Summer Court, the walk to the house was full of visions of ladies fanning themselves and children swimming in the ponds and lakes within the city, ice cream vendors had set up on every corner, but you couldn't stomach a sweet treat, even if it would save you from the searing heat prickling at your skin.

Let's just say that you were glad you had opted for a dress that was lightweight.

The oak door opened to reveal Rhys, he grinned at you, clearly excited for what he was able to witness in that moment. Then, he glanced to Azriel who you saw nod from the corner of your eye, not caring at all about the silent conversation between them as your eyes delved further into the home, expecting to see your former fiancé lingering in the shadows.

"Come in," Rhys spoke, laying a comforting hand on your shoulder.

Azriel stepped forward first, knowing that if he didn't pull you inside that you may bolt from the situation altogether.

Laughter echoed from the next room, that deep joyous sound that you had yearned to hear for too long, "I'm glad to see you," Rhys towered over you, he always had, but you had never found it threatening, you had found it more loving than anything.

The skin around your fingernails was red and sore, you hadn't stopped picking at them all morning despite Azriel's genteel scolding, "He's in there?"

Humming, Rhys moved to your other side and placed a stoic hand on the small of your back, "He is. Would you like to see him?"

Part of you was terrified. What if he didn't recognise you? What if he didn't like what you had become?

The pit in your stomach swirled with tentative excitement but you nodded, a bit too eagerly, a hand resting on your stomach, "Please."

Rhys glanced to Azriel whose gaze hadn't moved from you, ready to whisk you away if you even muttered the desire, and when you looked to the Shadowsinger, with eyes wide and pleading, he moved forward first, concealing your figure behind his wings as he reached for the handle and pushed the door open.

Silence cut through the laughter, tension lingered in the air, and you knew that Azriel was staring Lucien down, and you knew from the sound of rustling leather that the former male had rose to his feet.

Azriel entered, his wings still stretched, wings that would stay that way until you were ready. Rhys squeezed your hand in his and rounded the curve of the wings of his brother, and then you appeared, gently grazing Azriel's hand that he had clasped behind his back; he craned his head over his shoulder and you nodded, and then he lowered them.

Lucien was exactly as you remembered him.

Tall and stoic, russet eyes and the scar that made you alike in more ways than one, the golden freckled skin and the long red hair that was braided over his shoulders. He looked older in a way, which was to be expected, his eyes were heavier, and you couldn't help but feel responsible for some of that.

A smile, a teasing but loving smile tugged on his lips, and you could have sworn you saw his eyes glisten, saw that glisten pool on his bottom lids, "Hello, you."

Voice like honey, smooth and sweet, and you couldn't stop the sob from escaping your lips as he crossed the room and bundled you into his arms. Crackling flames and cinnamon. It ached to smell him, to hold him as his fingers ran through your hair, "You haven't changed at all."

"Let me see you," he cradled your face in his hands, his eyes wandered your face, and a single tear fell down his cheek that you swept up with your thumb, "Look at you," he smiled and swallowed hard, "I'm so proud of you."

Emotion clawed at your face and you couldn't help but cry, it was relief and sadness, the worst part of leaving Spring was leaving him behind to tend to the wolf. Not a day had gone by where you hadn't thought of him.

The last time Lucien had seen you he wasn't sure if you'd make it. You were so frail, the fight within you had vanished, he hadn't seen you smile in months, you were broken and felt no desire to put yourself back together.

"Thank you," you strained, your throat bubbling with sobs, "I would have died there if it wasn't for you. I don't know how to begin thanking you."

Lucien shushed you, "You already have. Look at how far you've come y/n. It was all worth it, like we said, remember?"

How couldn't you remember?

"The wound is the place where the light enters you," you spoke the words in a whisper and Lucien watched your lips form the words he had spoken to you after one rather terrible night, on the night where you had been so close to breaking, so close to ending it all.

Lucien was the one who made you fight, he was the one who gave you hope and muttered words of worth into your ear. Grinning like a feline cat, Lucien finished the sentence for you, he spoke to you the words you used to utter in reply to him, "Light it up, y/n."

The words held a different meaning now, you weren't a broken girl anymore, you weren't the daughter of some Spring Lord or some fiancé to the High Lord himself. The words meant something else entirely, you had shone, you had shone in every place you had went after Spring, you had lit up the world, and you had done that because you had found the strength in your darkest of days to sprout from the earth and grow.

You knew that the room was watching you, but you didn't dare to let the embarrassment worm its way inside of you as you became aware of Elain and Feyre, and of Azriel and Rhys around you.

"Light it up, Lucien."

In that moment, you blissfully forgot about that foreboding message laid bare for you outside of your front door, you pushed it aside to feel the blanket of false safety wrap itself around you. The day turned to night, and you found yourself unmoving from the space between Lucien and Azriel, Nyx had crawled into your lap the moment he had seen you and kicked up a fuss in Nesta's arms.

How foolish of you to believe that you were allowed to be happy. How foolish of you to believe that the blood red shadow rooted deep into the earth of your home was nothing but a paranoid figment of your imagination.

Author's Note

Sorry again! I hope this was worth the wait x

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