Tumgik
#its actually over im devastated
sereneslash · 4 months
Text
no one talk to me (<- guy who posted ivy + oisin fanart three hours before the episode where they're both immediately targeted and brutally killed came out)
20 notes · View notes
alchemicaladarna · 5 months
Text
Hi sorry, I'm ill about the soul vulture arc again. Because q!Bad made choices in his grief, in his rage, thinking he will never feel an ounce of happiness again because he thought his kids were dead. Q!Bad's Acceptance was never of accepting that grief and learning to live after it, but rather, it was the silent admission that his children were dead and there was nothing he could do. No rage, no monster, no demon, no power in heaven or hell could bring them back. It was Acceptance. But the cruel twist of fate was the fact that he was wrong. Pomme, Dapper, and the other eggs were alive, actually. By the time he found out, however, it was already too late. He was long gone, and every choice has a consequence, and he suffered the consequences of his choices like hell.
Q!Bad was dead long before he fell in the lavender field one hundred feet away from the house his children built. One hundred steps away from his sleeping children he fought so hard to keep safe, under all costs. He died the night they were taken away, because they were his soul, his happiness. Everything that mattered in the millenia he's existed, nothing could compare to his children. He died that night; and all those months where it seemed like he was alive, where he was "healing" was the grim reaper bargaining with himself to hold on a little longer for his children.
Q!Bad loved Dapper and Pomme, and Richas, and all the eggs- he loved them so much it hurt. He loved them so much that love became his hell- his purgatory. Q!Bad loved them until the moment he finally stepped in his grave and couldn't bargain any more.
He deteriorated for months. He was literally melting from the inside. The vultures pecked at his body and fractured his soul. The radiation melted the skin off his limbs, and the brain inside his skull. It hurt like no other death, but if it meant seeing his kids for one more day, then that hell was more than worth it. And the physical pain wasn't the worst of it- no, eventually, he forgot his children's names, their faces, he forgot his own name, and he forgot himself. Memories slipping away like lost fragments of time. Until his death, when he was barely himself anymore.
People noticed, but never really did anything to stop it did they? I mean, who are we kidding, even if anyone spoke up, nothing they could have done would have prevented the inevitable. Dapper knew the fate his father subjected himself to. She knew what scars from soul vultures looked like, and she tried to find a cure. He tried, when he still had his lab, but there was never enough time. No science or magic could ever remedy what was already destined to happen.
And Pomme, sweet Pomme, stayed with her father until the end. She gave him health potions- "medicine"- to help his ailments. And she had so much hope she lived in denial- she thought he was getting better. But the truth is that the memory lapses and the illness never ceased because no medicine could ever resurrect a fractured soul clinging on to his deceased body.
Then Q!Bad finally relinquished himself to the sweet mercy of death. And when he arrived, he found the promise of paradise- the promise of Home, where he would never have had to suffer a painful hell again. But he chose to come back to live and to suffer once more because this time, his children were waiting on the other side. For the first time, the scales were balanced, and his happiness was halved because he had a home that was worth living in, and a life that was worth living. For the first time in the millennia q!bad had been alone, he had love. And that was enough.
The story has always been about love and loss, and the beauty of love and life, despite that loss. That's why the soul vultures arc is my favorite, and also why I nearly cried halfway through writing this. Because love thrives in spite of the loss, and the grief, and the personal hell. When death comes, and it always does, and time has eroded every portrait, or photograph, or memory- all that is left is love. And that love is hope, as well as grief. It is joy and sadness. It is heaven and hell. It is simply love.
60 notes · View notes
nerdie-faerie · 6 months
Text
I'm once again thinking about the missed opportunities to have Klaus and Kol bond more. Part of Klaus' whole motivation as a vampire is to get his werewolf part back and to finally be stronger than Mikael (sort of, I'm simplifying) both of which can be obtained by breaking his curse. But Kol? Kol is the only other original that can relate to having a fundamental part of themself ripped away from them. Klaus might not have known he was a werewolf until he killed, but he likely still had a connection he couldn't explain, as evident by him going to watch the wolves transform. And something he'd never been able to explain was now gone. He might only be able to realise the connection afterwards through its absence.
Kol though. Kol had grown up with magic, a connection to nature and the world around him in a way the rest of his siblings supposedly didn't have. And then he gets turned. And not only has his baby brother died, his father has just murdered him and the rest of his siblings after forcing them to drink human blood, which he'll later learn. Now, not only does he have to deal with the grief of Henrik's death and also his own but also the loss of his magic. A loss that's likely only worsened by Kol being a self-proclaimed child prodigy.
Kol is pretty much the only one who could understand what Klaus is going through with the binding of his wolf. We know Kol searched for ways to get his magic back/carry on practicing magic in the same way that Klaus was looking for ways to break his curse. While Klaus likely could still feel his wolf there despite being bound, Kol has no access to his magic anymore. I just think they should've been able to bond or connect over their shared loss of an intrinsic aspect of their selves at the hands of their parents
#TVD#The Mikaelsons#Kol Mikaelson#Klaus Mikaelson#briefly back on my the originals shouldve gotten to be a family goddammit and as someone from a big family im personally offended bs#i did right a lil snippet about them bonding over this that i havent posted yet for the joml verse but still think its an unexplored concep#need more witch!kol acknowledgement honestly. just need more content of my boy#anyway. klaus having a fascination with the moon and kol telling him about celestial events and how it affects his magic when theyre boys#klaus losing that connection to the moon feeling lost & extra tempermental feeling his wolf claw at its binds and vowing to break his curse#kol determined to get his magic back at any cost relating to that devasting loss and promising to help him find a loophole for his curse#kol who becomes extra reckless and determined when he learns that theres a way to break klaus' curse so maybe he can get his magic back too#that knowledge and recklessness combined with his loss of magic driving him to become the volatile vampire that we see#that leads to him being daggered repeatedly but that first time breaks something in that bond between him & klaus that never fully recovers#it makes him bitter and resentful only fueling his reckless behaviour particularly when there seems to be no leads on reclaiming his magic#that he becomes distant from his siblings in the process especially with finn still daggered but that distance only cements the idea#to his siblings that hes a danger and cant be trusted that he needs to be daggered if theyre to stay safe from mikael#the loss of his magic leading to his spiral as a vampire and him being ostracised by his family > actual tvdu kol canon#klaus being trapped in a room staring at the corpse of his little brother knowing he never repaired that relationship with him#and now he never can so he refuses to look away as penance and a reminder of his failings to his little brother#*edit: one of the reblogs on this post is the author of big bad wolf and honestly she does an amazing job at portraying the mikaelsons#as actual siblings if you havent read it its one of my favourites for characterisations but we need more 😭 i want it to be the norm
69 notes · View notes
faaun · 1 month
Text
ok let's catch up quickly
#so i went on a few dates w this guy. long hair beautiful face kinda looked like a girl (good) said yes ma'am when i told him to do smth#(also good) film student great at photography including candids. made a sheath of leather for a sword pin i have . et cetera.#he asked to cuddle and i was like iggg and then i felt Nothing and i was like ohhh yh ok ok yep lesbian#like he meets almost all my criteria but. yeahhh no . also at the end of that date he had some weird takes. anyway broke up w him and told#him actually im p sure im a lesbian (again) and he was like yk thats the second time this has happened to me this week but its ok bc ive#fallen for this girl from berlin. and then we cooked together. anyway . met a beautiful butch lowk in love w her. weve been on (1) date.#have two exams in a few days havent studied enough going to like end it all basically. my research partner kicked me off our research#(expected(it was always skinda sketchy)) which was devastating + it happened in a lidl 15 hours into a journey from bordeaux#to go back to the UK. my friends were kinda busy paying for baguettes but also they heard this whole exchange and are kinda mad at him#my friend of 10+ years is coming over in a few days. my evil ex situationship person that i decided to stay friends w because i kept#insisting they are a good friend and not evil and also extremely beautiful? turns out shockingly enough they were evil. tried to fix them#and then i realised due to their entire friendship group being ppl like me (Every Single One of their friends are ppl they met on dating#apps then led on then dumped and proposed staying friends w) and are collectively extremely attracted to them and not over them they#keep validating the most diabolical shit they say/do to hace a chance w them. they broke up w their ex and the way they keep leading#this poor girl on and making her heartbeeak worse and saying that they want more power over her and want her to beg for them back etc...MY#JAW HAD DROPPED esp bc i didnt even know the ex was in the picture BECAUSE ME AND ONE OF OUR FRIENDS (that they also dated) HAD JUSR SLEPT#NAKED TOGETHER IN THEIR BED W THEM. GIRL. anyway that is the least of the diabolical stuff they said but no we are moving onnn#this was b4 the beautiful butch btw. anyways . i have a mitski concert tmrw i think?? idek anymore#i used to have a crush on this guy very briefly and then it disappeared and then i realised if he fundementally changed everything abt#himself then maybe id like him but ofc i didnt tell him that but i still think abt it sometimes but anyway thats irrelevant now bc 99% sure#even if he did id still not find him attractive (lesbianism). please recommend good overnight moisturisers btw i have super dry skin#right. the friend of 10 yrs. we had a hard convo abt why she essentially bullied me in year 8 and it made me highly bitter but i also love#her and ik things are diff now its been like . Many Years . and shes going to stay a while I HAVE TWO EXAMS I DONT HAVE TIME but i love her#its fine. i think i might just switch into medicine and do the whole become a neurosurgeon thing (which was my plan B) bc plan A is looking#kinda impossible rn. I WANNA TALK MORE ABT WHAT THE EX SITUATIONSHIP PERSON SAID but i wont bc i dont wanna be too mean but also . MY GOD#i had a conversation w a philosopher friend about whether i have a moral responsibility to try to fix them bc unleashing this on society#feels wrong and he said 'probably but...run' so yeah im not talking to them atm. second date w beautiful butch on monday btw IDK WHAT TO#WEAR. she said she likes fems. im just gonna wear the shortest ralph lauren skirt i have w the cute leg warmers and hope 4 the best#its 1:15 AM im abt to drink coffee and start studying bc what the FUCK man. also almost finished watching the boys its very good#one of my best friends is struggling rn it is breaking my heart i want to take the burden from her i miss her very much
16 notes · View notes
chelseahotel2004 · 1 month
Text
getting emotional about pokemon anime again...
3 notes · View notes
tryhoney-moved · 2 months
Text
.
2 notes · View notes
sleepyyghostt · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media
what if i dont explain the context for this
9 notes · View notes
nyxofdemons · 11 months
Text
god i have so many projects i need to finish i shouldn't be starting a new one. but. the idea in my head for a royalty au (i know theyre also royals in canon i just don't know what else to call it) where ozzie and stolas are both princes in an arranged engagement, blitz is an assassin personally employed by the royal family, and fizz is the court jester, is one that. uh. kind of has me in its clutches rn
8 notes · View notes
bravevolunteer · 6 months
Text
fnaf edits are so funny bc there’s so little material i’ll settle for anything. i saw this and my first reaction was “oh you’re SICK for this” and then the self awareness kicked in. and i had to laugh at myself. AND I STILL SAVED IT
2 notes · View notes
saviorpilled · 1 year
Text
thinking abt genloss AGAIN and feeling sick to my tummy it makes me so fucking sad aoaouughhh
8 notes · View notes
pepprs · 2 years
Text
elton johns music is so fucking beautiful and heart wrenching and it makes me want to cry and i hate that i can’t like allow myself to emote to his music normally because if i cried over elton john then my mom would win. and so many things in my life are like if i x then my mom would win and i can’t do that. Lol
#purrs#w the elton john thing it’s bc she is an elton john megafan and cries over him every time she hears one of his songs or like sees a social m#media post from him lol so it’s like… if i cry over elton john too then she will have… idk. it’s not her succeeding in making me a clone of#her or whatever it’s like this weird thing where i can’t actually do what my mom wants me to do or like what my mom wants me to like even wh#when they align w things i genuinely want / like to do bc then… i’ll be more vulnerable to her? we’ll have a reason to bond? idk. i don’t t#think that’s it i don’t know why im struggling to put it into words but it squicks me out. so here i am standing in her room w my siblings b#Bc she called us all in to watch 2 marching bands perform a tribute to him in a giant stadium and she’s crying and i am genuinely moved by t#the performance and she wouldn’t even see if i cried but im standing there fighting back tears and hating myself and not understanding why#but i wish my mom was like. more normal about elton john. its not bad at all that she loves him so much it’s just… weird and suffocating fo#for me and it would be cool to find my own connection to his music without feeling u comfortable because i grew up having to call him#uncle elton and her dancing with us to his songs. lol. cringeeee childhood memories i guess idk#delete later#like literally goodbye yellow brick road is the single most devastating piece of music ever created.
20 notes · View notes
saviorkink · 7 months
Text
x
#so its been 3 months exactly since me & my ex like... said farewell#very dramatically#i just found out he blocked me on tiktok. 2 months ago i would've been devastated but now i just feel kinda bummed out#like is this really how 4 years of best friendship & 1 year of dating fuckery ends? damn lol it wasn't even all that#but mostly i just think its extremely pathetic & childish and LOSERRRR BEHAVIORRRR . for a 100k tiktok acc#to block a 150 follower account that doesnt even follow him + doesnt interact#like ok you said you weren't in love with me?? yet you feel the need to block me 3 months after the fact#im minding my business unless he breaks first (which has been the case a few times)#its still hard to get over him but he's making it easier every day!#just yesterday i was on the train On my way! to a concert & i remembered the afternoon before my harry concert in june last night#the mutual interest if you will had been re-established like a week prior & i texted him if he wanted to hang out and he said yes (ofc)#and the tension.......... GOD I MISS THATHSFDJKFS#walking around decathlon flirting oh it was SO STUPIDDD. THE GIGGLES. personally i've never really experienced that on that level before bc#like it's the best friends to lovers thing its the fact that we both felt the energy shift very clearly and were leaning into it#but not actually doing anything about it yet#just making stupid jokes flirting giggling but acting like actually nothing is going on#when i damn well know that if any of my friends saw us that afternoon they would've side eyed us SOOOOO HAARDDDDD#not to wax poetic over the guy who fucked me over so many times but. the electric energy .....#i'm probably not going to feel That ever again#whatever! whatever#txt
1 note · View note
Text
.
3 notes · View notes
butchbroodygay · 2 years
Text
I guess we all knew it was coming but warrior nun has been cancelled and I don't think I'll recover anytime soon, godspeed dykes until the next one :')
10 notes · View notes
lycanthrology · 2 years
Note
obliterated by a bunch of frenchmen 😔 how sad for you
anglophobia in my askbox 😤
5 notes · View notes
donghuamuqing · 2 years
Text
Absolutely devastating for will. Just in general
#my post#i tried three separate times to make this post have the emotion i wanted but i couldnt do it its too much#this is about s3 specifically and about no matter how quickly mike tried to apologize and lucas did apologize#they still made fun of him#made fun lf him for something they could mever understand#how will feels like time is running through him and how suddenly hes older but he doesnt feel like it#time is a rushing river that get faster and harsher and wills desperately trying to dam it up with twigs and sticks but they snap and break#and bend#and he just wants fo play with his friends#he wants to go back to being 10 11 12 when the world wasnt trying to hurt him and hes dressing up in a silly gown that his mom probably made#trying to make his friends laugh too because he knows theyre upset but also really wants to just hang out and have fun#as someome whos also scared they arent growing up the same way as their friends i cant stand thinking about that moment in s3 because#the thought of my friends laugjing at me for anything is enough to make me tear up#i also feel left behind especially when my roommates both have thei boyfriends over and are hanging out and i can hear them laughing#and talking and im just here in my room.#thats it im just here in my room and im alone and i dont know what to do about it#just absolutely devasting to be will i cant think about him or ill start crying!!!#WILL BYERS RHE MOST CHARACTER EVER. ACTUALLY#sorry this turned into mostly about myself but projecting is so easy when the show basically does it for you#really hope the winter depression doesnt hit this season but i also said that last time and that was about the worst ive ever felt. lol#diary time diary time!!!!
1 note · View note