#its hard not to feel like im right about all my fears but yknow. we can keep pretending

[cleromancy]

oracle year one born of hope from batman chronicles #5 (published 1996) is hands down the best defridging story ive ever read for a lot of reasons--the first being just that its such a damn good comic in the first place. but every time i read it im so struck by the way it reframes the casual *incidental* violence done to barbara in TKJ, where she's just an obstacle in the joker's way to get to jim (to get to batman) and it's not *about* her. on the very second page of OYO we have this:

the entire page (...minus bruce in the bg up there) is drawn from barbaras point of view while she recounts the incident from her hospital bed. literally recentering her and her perspective, her experience and her feelings. where TKJ sensationalizes and sexualizes the violence done to her we see an illustration of her choice--love for her father, "don't get up"--then the shock and pain of the injury, then the operating room.

and she opened the story with "i cant believe i was such an idiot," berating herself for not looking through the peephole or using the chain on the door before she opened it, emphasizing that she knew better, and its a very human response to being the victim of something like this--almost fixating on a small mistake you made. inside the story its about the grief and the sense of control bargaining gives you--"if only i had--!" and then on the meta level its actually addressing the "well why DIDNT barbara look through the peephole???" (<- the answer being that TKJ never considered whether or not she would have, bc that was less important to the story than hurting her.)

and the next page. god. its masterful:

the balance of OYO being a response to TKJ on a meta level and the genuine story-level exploration of barbaras feelings just in the first 3 pages alone... chefs kiss. the way it addresses the previous bullshit storytelling choices--but builds something new off of them, because that shouldn't be the end of barbaras story.

and its so fantastic bc it doesn't shy away from barbaras ugly feelings...

she's so angry and she's allowed to be. and thats also what makes it such a good defridging--that its a resonant portrayal of becoming disabled. anger, grief, humiliation, shame, fear, the absolute *slog* that is recovery, the realization that your independence has been compromised... it really reckons with what this means for her in that moment and moving forward.

just posting this one bc i love her...

and the crux of the story is barbara taking control back over her life, barbara not feeling helpless anymore. its a superhero origin story to its core and its fantastic at what it does.

and i mean... i do always feel iffy about this part:

the juxtaposition of her wanting to do this without batmans help with her, well, unknowingly accepting bruces help. makes seesaw motion with hand. i always feel like its a bit of a weak spot... i like elements of it, particularly *because* this work is addressing so much of TKJs bullshit; this is making bruce actually care about barbaras injury because fuck you he *should* care, he *should* do something. and barbaras need for independence and her struggles to accept help are pretty central to her character and in a story about disability... i mean interdependence is a core tenant of disability rights activism, no man is an island and all that. but btwn it being bruce who finds richard dragon for her to train with, and richard dragon both being yknow a man and not a wheelchair user himself, it falls flat. which is really something you notice bc the rest of the story is so damn good... its hard for me to put my finger on exactly what i think they should've done instead, bc they only had 18 pages for this story and like. it's incredibly tight, not a panel wasted, so it *was* important that barbaras teacher be someone we the reader already know, and there was no *time* to establish some other way for barbara to find someone of richard fucking dragons caliber on her own without bruces connections.

but that i guess does bring me to. the other thing i find frustrating re: OYO which is just that it's. 18 pages collected with two other stories, neither of which is memorable... i mean how many other year ones of a heavy hitter like barbara freakin gordon can you think of with less than a single full issue? and batgirl year one had 9 issues (9 mediocre, mediocre issues). i dont think OYO needed that much time (but hey neither did fucking bgyo)... but come on. come on!!!!!!

anyway whatever. oracle sweep

[weirdcat1213]

volume 9 you say....hmm

i fear for my life to be completely honest

anyway HERE WE GO HERE ARE THE THOUGHTS

chap 1:

-geesus no pls no i dont wanna read anymore

-FLASHBACK TIME :D WIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

-3 days of crying is nothing when youre a trigun fan, am i right people :'D

-no im not fucking suffering cuz while all of that is happening the only thing on his mind is young livio NO IM FINE I SWEAR-

-lmao yeah wolfwood call him out >:D

-"you cant understand how i feel" my brother in christ YOURE SURROUNDED BY ORPHANS

-hmmmmmmmmm i mean im not sure if that applies here but who am i to tell him how he feels, sure buddy. happy for you

-geesus man not the dog, like....WHY THE DOG (i think ik why but still)

-tbh i would also go and ask for an explanation

-nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo :c

-ah shit so we're here now oh fuck oh shit okokok cool

-ah yes, sweet bait actually, makes me cry every time

-"once this ark scare is over we'll be living the high life" yeaaaahhhh....about that.....

-YO LEAVE THE ORPHAN ALONE DAMN

-thanks livio :3

chap 2:

-about his age i think hes on his 20s mentally but he looks like hes on his 30s, so hes still an adult but yknow...younger

-oh his eye :0 i love that tiny window between his glasses and his face where you can see his eyes, makes me sad every time

-the coolest mf

-"worse" you say...i wonder who did that to him...

-fuck off, take those fucking tears somewhere else old man

-OOOOOOHHHHH THAT PANEL!!! SO GOOD SO GOOD

-THANKS AGAIN LIVIO (livio's good actions counter: 2 so far) BUT FUCK THAT OLD MAN

chap 3:

-:c

-HES THERE AND HES COMING I PROMISE

-STFU I SWEAR SHUT UP WOLFWOOD PLS JUST ENJOY YOUR STUPID CIGARRETE

-oh ok yeah here we go

-GEESUS MAN, i hope someone kick you ass later

-aw livio noooooo :c

-NAH NO PLS NO BROTHER FIGHT NO NO

-damn

chap 4:

-no that fucking title while theyre bleeding holy crap no stop it nightow stop it

-leave my man alone plsssssssssssssssss

-OH I FUCKING FELT THAT. WOLFWOOD REACHING FOR ANOTHER MAGAZINE AND LIVIO SHOOTING AT THE SAME MOMENT. I FELT THAT

-oh thats...thats kinda hot actually (i say while wolfwood fights for his little life)

-i love nightow taking his fucking time. yes sir i will enjoy a page of the vial dropping from his mouth without any dialogue, thank you sir

-PAIN :D

-SHUT UP OLD MAN

-"please survive"................................im gonna need a million years

chap 5:

-VASH BABY WHERE ARE YOU I NEED YOU

-demon....while hes killing his bro.....i have a limit thats all im saying

-ITS CALLED LOVE BITCH

-HE GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE HONOR HE JUST WANTED TO PROTECT HIS HOME WTF

-STOP TALKING AND KILL HIM MAN CMONNNN

-oh....he looks so pretty tho. likes he came back to life and is surrounded by his servants....damn that goes hard...

-oh yeah, that arm that had no explanation whatsoever. its ok tho, nightow gets a pass

-ah fuck.....hes here...

-yeap, you could say thats a demon ig

chap 6:

-AH YES SAD FLASHBACK IN MENTAL PALACE MAKES ME GO BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. ONE OF THE BEST THINGS EVER IM TELLING YA :D

-im sorry

-im jumping through the window idc anymore. poor livio man

-"fortitude".........yeah.....

-yeap that is scary as hell RUN WOLFWOOD GET TF OUTTA THERE

-DONT SMILE LIKE THAT YOU FREAK

-NONONONONONON SHUT UP WOLFWOOD SHUT UP

-STOPPPPPPPPPPPP

-STOPL PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE

-DIOS IM NOT STRONG ENOUGH

-orange if you animate this i will punch you but also kiss you in the lips

-i wonder what he means with that bell thats supposed to be tolling. hmmm. maybe its like a "hey come back to reality" kind of alarm thats not sounding

nightow you amazing bastard

[herobrinna]

ok so ive spammed my friend with toh thoughts a bit to much so time to ramble here i suppose. (sorry in advance thisll be very disjointed and go from one random point to another).

my main take away from the finale is that it felt a bit... hollow?

like dont get me wrong, the animation was so fucking good. getting more titan and collector lore was also so cool (and hellooo The Titan being such a genderqueer royal? absolutely love how natural toh rep is, like its just thrown out there and no one questions it, just how shit is, absolutely bangers- *gets shot*). and aaaa, the aged up re-designs of all the characters are so good, especially like the detail how all the hexsquad have a flapjack tattoo.

yet there are so many bits that just feel off? like they couldve been handle better (even with the cut runtime the show had).

first lets start with the Collector who just got done dirty, like their whole arc was about the fear of being alone again, yet at the end they decided to leave? just like that? like would it not make more sense for him to stay with Eda, to learn to control his powers better and make new friends. especially them leaving to "mature" or whatever doesnt really make sense, like how can they grow as a person if they dont interact with others, if they dont get exposed to different opinions and believes and all that.

and i dont really like Collie, but it still feels like he deserved better, especially after taking up so much runtime.

actually you know what wouldve made the show better? not introducing the Collector in the first place.

no but think about it, why waste so much runtime on a character that didnt even exist before the show was cut (and thus had very little foreshadowing and buildup to his introduction) and then to not even give them a sweeter ending?

if anything the show shouldve stuck with the Day of Unity being the true finale. like honestly if DoU happened over the 3 specials they actually had plenty of time to flesh out all the existing characters further, maybe there could have been even a little more time for more slice of life moments. but then the whole bit with Collie just feels likes taking away precious time, that his character could have only worked if the show wasnt cut, but if it wasnt cut he wouldnt have existed in the first place, so man idk.

and on the topic of the DoU, holy shit Belos got done dirty, im actually mildly mad at his demise.

like it just overall doesnt make sense thematically.

like, ok this is gonna be hard to phrase, and i would like to straight away say i dont think Belos should ever be redeemed, just gonna use other characters redemptions as example.

so toh throughout its enite runtime is really set on showing that everyone deserves a second chance for as long as they want and are willing to change. we see this with Lilith who was pretty much immediately redeemed at the beginning of s2, and whilst many people say it was rushed, or she didnt deserve it, i think otherwise. like throughout s1 she only tries to get Eda into the Emperor's coven out of the belief that Belos will cure her, cuz yknow, she feels really fucking guilty for cursing her sister, and even then she doesnt really force Eda that much into joining, like there are many moments of weakness were Lilith couldve dragged Eda to the emperor, but she didnt, she gave Eda many chances to join on her own. and again the only reason she even wanted Eda to be in the coven was to right her mistake of cursing her. so after going through that guilt for years of course shed be forgiven quickly, as she showed that she wants to change, be better and all that.

we see this with Hunter as well, though his redemption was more gradual, yet still his past wrongs arnt brought up, like how he patronised Eda and Luz during his first meeting, or attacked Amity in eclipse lake, cuz he was also doing shit out of the belief of helping people, and clearly wanted to change for the better, so why bring up his past wrongs when hes a better person now and all that.

why bring this up?

well with Belos toh brought up an interesting dilemma, what do you do with a person that doesnt want to change, thats stuck in a loop of his short sighted beliefs in a system thats ready to accept and help anyone that tries to change regardless of their past?

and the answer to that being to just kill him?

like how does that solve anything? he died thinking he was in the right, that witches are still spawns of satan or whatever tf. it just feels like it goes against what the show established.

now dont get me wrong, the scene of him trying to manipulate Luz for the millionth time and her just staring him down completely unfazed is amazing, it says more than any actual words could ever. what isnt is then Raine, Eda and King immediately stomping him afterwards, which again, just proofs Belos' point that witches are "evil" from his perspective. (how did he even die from that when even mf Collie wasnt able to kill him? and ne got hit by a car and that *still* didnt kill him either, it just feels like he shouldve survived that)

so imagine if instead of them stomping him down they decided to imprison him, that will of course also have the effect of saving him from the boiling rain. so now Belos has to live with the fact that it was witches that saved him, the same witches he'd never show that kind of mercy to, the same witches he would murder the second he got the chance, and what makes it worse is the fact that the human, the one he oh so creepily obsessed over didnt even do anything, wouldve left him suffer in the boiling rain if she had the choice.

and just generally, letting him actually *live* with the consequences of his actions would have been so much more fitting. like dying is easy, wayy too easy, an escape from consequences, but actually living with said consequences, well thats delightfully horrific.

and his death isnt the only way that they done him dirty, the Titan also basically just said that Belos is just evil and theres nothing more too it, when there literally is?? like hello what were all thos Hollow Mind paintings for if not to show that Belos aint just pure evil, how he is a victim of shitty circumstances, yet how despite that it doesnt excuse the extent to which he took shit to.

and the just forgot about that?

... oh right, they forgot the memory paintings even existed untill someone posted their own redraws of them, no wonder they fucked Belos' character up so much :/

man im getting tired from rambling this much lol

but overall its just toh has so many missed opportunities, i could go on and on about them, although not like my rambles make any sense probably, and many people have def explained similar point much better so im just gonna shit up now.

(and of course im gonna rewrite this for my oc x Belos au <3 )

[smollilbaby]

F3AR

Fear. Im in fear. Everyday and now, im always in fear. Im fear of losing you. Deeply inside, im really scared of losing you. I dont know why but it hits me so hard... I dont do well with silent treatment. I dont do well with not communicating.

Yes, my past have been alot of sleeping it off or just let it be. But right now, everything have changed. I need to communicate with you. Its good for both of our mental health mylove. I want you to be healthy, both physically and mentally. It comes along with the reassurances too.

Even though that i know you loves me, i would still want you to say it, just so that i could feel the extra loves from you. Little things matters they say, every little thing that you do for me, really brighten up my day or even makes me smiles. Having the fear of losing you made me realised how deeply in love i am with you. You're everything to me. I would cherished every moment that we share together. You're worth fighting for, and honestly, you're special.

I would honestly do anything for you, sayang ❦

Touch my heart baby, touch my heart and feel how fast it beats whenever you're with me. I may come out strong like calling you annoying and jokingly ask you to shut up, but deep down, im scared. Im scared that it might hurt you or ur feelings. But no, instead you disturb me back, pinch me here and there like ahhhhh im so so in love with you baby, im just so deeply in love❦

I just love everything about you. Honestly, i am very happy with life cause yknow why? Cause you're in it! You make me a very happy person after so long. Is this what you called happiness? Cause im happy. I dont know how you did it, but i am. Im truly blessed and grateful to have you❦❦

I am thankful for everything you've done. Thank you for all the loving, concern and happiness you gave me. I hope i did my part as well that makes you happy and grateful to have me ❦

Your presence in my life is a reminder on how lucky i am to have you. Im thankful for the joy and laughter we shared together. I will never, ever take you for granted. I'll treasure & cherish you, mylove.

I love you, truly very much ❦❦

#sayang #inlove #grateful

[randynewfan]

im tired.

i am okay, i will not be throwing in the towel or anything, but man am i tired.

this world is exhausting. it feels like every single aspect of life revolves around money, everything feels so anxious.

there are tall blue flashing lights all along the streets of this city. cameras watching, making it hostile to anybody the state sees fit. it’s so dystopian, they blink incessantly, like some sort of lukewarm compromise when the government suggested a massive camera designed like a light pole and the general public caught on. they always set the rules, we have to try to pull them back to reality.

it feels dumb to even talk about any of this. so much of online discourse is just that exact thing. i don’t know how to make it bear fruit. at least, in my own life. it’s so hard to make a difference in a world that has been designed around you. it’s been designed for cars, for land developers and business owners, for the rich people who carve our cities and our lands, build our sprawling housing developments, and the people who make and enforce the laws.

so much autonomy has been stripped away. do or die, yknow. thankfully im not teetering like many are.

these are simply scary times. these would all feel less *urgent* or scary if it wasn’t for this impending … something. i don’t want to say collapse, because it’s just we need to change our entire economic system and way of living to prevent global catastrophe. you have to believe we’ll fix it. that’s how optimism works, that’s how hope works, if you don’t get it then ur miserable, just how it goes. but it’s scary, seeing how the state has been flexing its arms more and more with the police, digital control and avoiding addressing digital issues. i think it’s intentional that the rich politicians stay old, that’s best for everybody running the CIA, NSA, all the autonomous parts of our government.

just trying not to get lost in nonsense and information. trying to stay grounded. i’ve fallen through that before. im aware of it.

im just not sure what my future looks like. i know nobody does, but i don’t know if everyone realizes how fundamentally our world has to change. getting rid of fossil fuels means a top to bottom shift of american culture and social hierarchy. how do you make the people making the decisions do the right things? when they cannot convince us of their truth, they exert violence.

i read something about how the economy exists as something simultaneous across the world. it exists in billions of places and ways. people, cards, money, transactions, but all of it is reliant on value and, importantly, people being able to communicate and exchange shit. except, this inherent cultural value, to gather resources and wealth, and everything being connected, this economic idea has become, in a sense, alive and consuming. and it will keep eating because it’s reliant on its parts.

thought experiment. economics is all nonsense anyways. when musk either fires himself off into space or gets himself publicly executed, and all the stock brokers have escaped the matrix or whatever they’re calling suicide these days, it’ll stop existing. fun stuff.

i hope i’ll know how to use this drive. this passion. this rage against all the stuff we could be fixing, all the people we can help. it’s there. not going anywhere. i guess it just works its way out. just don’t conflate it with anger. this is not frustration. this is The Word they don’t give you meaning for. a hatred for normal, status quo, whatever until that means it’s good. a frustration with the complacency of being scared to die on the streets, and not having anything else you like to do so you work.

we’ll see how it all shakes out. i am glad i process this terrible situation we’re in as something more active than fear, denial, or acceptance. i know there is plenty of community action i can do. it’s just hard to even keep myself afloat in all this insanity. people aren’t meant to live like this, and our material conditions have not ever existed before this. people don’t feel the impermanence like they should.

anyways. i should sleep. my rambles are getting a little maniacal.

it makes me feel like a caged animal, knowing i’m being listened to. ads and videos popping up that, surely, are relevant because some database heard me say a buzzword last night on the couch.

[muwur]

Since requests were open I was wondering if I could request father headcanons for iwai + ushi + atsumu 🥺 btw your writing is vv tasty n I can’t wait to see you write more !! Keep up the good work n stay safe !!

haikyuu daddee headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for iwaizumi, ushijima, and atsumu

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.4k words

a/n: omg u called my writing taSTY Dx i cri tySM 💞 that is a high compliment for me AHAHAHAH ILY and ty for the request! 

also my lovelies i m back i m sry i was gone so long feojfe i miss yall <3 here u go enjoi, this was fun to write lmk if yall want more characetrs AHAHA

current listen: accidentally in love by sHREK AAHAH jkjk i mean counting crows, they cant take that away from me by ella fitzgerald and louis armstrong, love the way you lie by eminem and rihanna

requests: open!

iwaizumi

✧ prePARED daddy

✧ picked up on this parenting thing p fast, also does a lot of research so he’s ready to face any situation

✧ teaches his kids how to behave n respect others

✧ also makes sure they know not to talk to strangers and teaches them some self defense

✧ be warned these kids are packing a surprise can of whOOP ASS,, dont fuck w them,, plus u wouldnt want buff daddee iwa on ur tail

✧ honestly his kids would be ANGELS ,,, n thats cuz he treats them all so w e l l

✧ mans is ATTENTIVE. he asks his kids about their days, their interests, and encourages discussion about their fEELINGS 🥺

✧ always offers them really valuable and light-hearted advice

✧ and gives them the love and transparency we all wanted but never had--

✧ however his kids are easily (n negatively) influenced esp when uncle oikawa comes to visit--

✧ but mostly bc iwa gets annoyed and slips out a lot of curse words and a “shittykawa” and then his kids started calling oikawa that and now it’s ingrained in them forever fjoefefgfvi (*distant phlattykawa crying noises*)

✧ gives them LOTS of head pats and ruffles as signs of affection

✧ PACKS THEIR SCHOOL LUNCHES and ensures they eat a balanced meal

✧ attends all their games/events,, will get a bit rowdy hype them up

✧ def lets his kids sleep with him when they’re having a bad night or woke up scared from a nightmare (and waits for them to fall asleep before going to sleep himself fojref)

✧ when they were babies he usually succeeded to get them to stop crying by pulling funny faces, showing them their favorite cartoons, or humming a lullaby

✧ when they get older,,, u bet iwa would be suPER protective esp when their kids start being iNtErEsTeD in other people

✧ you: “iwaizumi, they seem like a really nice kid, though”

✧ iwa: *sitting with you in the car, across the street from the ice cream parlor your child said they were at, and spying from the window* “you can’t trust everyone, of course they seem ‘nice,’ they just want our approval”

✧ definitely did not interrupt his child’s potential first kiss at their house’s doorstep by slamMINg the door open “sUDDENLY” cuz he “hEard TheIR vOicEs and THougHt TO lET them In”

✧ effectively traumatized both kids

✧ tho he felt bad after n u made him go apologize so he did (and he was forgiven, only if he agreed to never spy on them again--)

✧ doesn’t stop him from scrutinizing every person yalls kid introduces to you tho

✧ overall a super supportive dad, 11/10

ushijima

✧ ok dEF does not know much about parenting ,, at first

✧ stared at his child like ???nani when you both changed their first diaper

✧ also had plenty of staring contests with his babies ,,, called it bonding

✧ was curious and tasted baby food once,,, immediately regretted it

✧ once put a volleyball next to his child, who attempted to bite it, and took it as a sign that they liked it

✧ after sum time n practice, his mind becomes split between “how to volleyball” and “how to dad”

✧ catch him in the kitchen wearing an apron and whipping up his kids’ favorite smiley face pancakes 😤😤

✧ has an amazing ability to get his kids to stop crying, does really simple things like give them their favorite toy or place a gentle hand on their hand or attend to their needs (mans can tell if they want food or needa poop) and they calm down immediately

✧ carried them on his shoulders once and now they never stop asking him for shoulder rides (not that he minds anyway)

✧ if theres two kids he can probs carry one on each shoulder cuz cmon ,,, have u seen this man

✧ always goes to every performance/game/event his child takes part in

✧ man smiles so soft™ when he goes to the 1st grade play and sees his kid’s name in the program next to their role as “townsperson b” (next year, they upgraded to “singing carrot” in a play about the food pyramid)

✧ if his kid ends up enjoying volleyball, he will teach them e v e r y t h i n g they need to know

✧ but is overall super supportive of anything else his child pursues and doesn’t push anything onto them, would rather let them choose what they want to do

✧ had n o idea what to do when his kid asked him about the birds n the bees asfghkl

✧ couldnt sleep one night thinking about it and just randomly asks you while yall laying in bed in the dARk like “so our child asked me how babies are made and I told them they came from watermelon seeds” (you: 👁️👄👁️ “come again”)

✧ you: *at the grocery store with your child*

✧ child: *hands you watermelon* “I want a little brother!”

✧ you: “haha of course honey” 👁️👄👁️ what do i do (*later to ushijima* “duhfojhguf we needa get another baby i promised our child a younger brother fohurof” ; ushi: “wat” ; you: “itS YOUR FAULT”)

✧ yall eventually tell them not every watermelon can produce babies only really special ones that are really hard to get fhuoefkfotfi theyre not ready for the truth

✧ another great daddee, we stan

atsumu

✧ knew parenting was stressful esp with bABieS but was like eh it cant be that bad right

✧ think again

✧ g o o d b y e  s l e e p

✧ develops phat bags under his eyes, responds with a weak “aha im fine just that parenting life and the kids ykNOW” whenever his teammates ask if he’s oKAY

✧ tried to tempt his kids to eat their mush baby food by trying it himself, nearly gagged but was able to say “eughh yuMM”

✧ loves to lift them high up in the air, even throws them up a little and nearly drops them (yall almost died from feAR but babie was having so much fun,,, yall agreed to be just a bit more careful)

✧ rlly bad at getting them to stop crying, gets very stressed when he’s exhausted every option he can think of then calls you over for some help/advice (you: *immediately calms them down* ; ratsumu: “how--”)

✧ calls up osamu a lot to ask him how to make food ,, then simps whenever his twin brother comes over and the kids are in love with this man and his cooking (”dad why cant you make stuff as yummy as this”)

✧ very affectionate with his kids, gives them lots of hugs and kisses on the forehead

✧ plays with them a lot! whether it’s sports, just dance, animal crossing, or UNO, yOU NAME IT WE PLAY IT

✧ also has no mercy when playing competitive video or board games,, has made them cry more than once LOL

✧ so sometimes he toned it down n let them win,, until his kids actually got better and DEMOLISH him every time

✧ is cool with his kids cursing, just as long as they don’t do it in front of their teachers LMAO

✧ plays innocent when he gets a call from school saying his kid was using ‘inappropriate language’ and is like “whaaat? my child? im not even sure where they learned that, maybe check if the other kids in class are saying those things, too--”

✧ reminisces how much nicer his kids were to him when they were younger and all the time they spent together,,, bc now that they reached their tEeNS they want alone time

✧ wants to be B) cool dad so he tries kinda hard, esp in front of their friends but his kid’s just like dad pls dofjrgjigtgro

✧ also very supportive of whatever his kids want to pursue and dedicates time to help them in whatever ways he can (whether that be to help them practice, make sure he can provide transportation, get them supplies, etc)

✧ always playfully competing with you to see who’s the “better” parent (you win by default)

✧ PROTECTIVE dad and will easily intimidate ANYONE who crosses his kids

✧ takes sum adjustment and mental resilience but daddee atsumu perseveres  😤 absolutely loves his kids and would do anything for them  

[sukirichi]

hello! um

i just wanted to pass around to say that i cant stop thinking about your mitsuya fic (yea the one that fucked us all up)

it has literally lingered in my mind since i finished it, sounds really weird but it just got like... plastered in me. i dont know how to explain it. cause when im doing my everyday shit, it suddenly overcomes me, this random ass sad feeling that started since the moment i read it. and its just so weird.

even the song that you attached, that accompanied me while i was reading, has stayed with me ever since. and the freakiest thing is that i actually dont understand a single word from it because i dont speak that language at all, but i still felt it in the deepest part of my being. everything felt real, raw. the pain crossed my phone screen and went direct to my fucking heart but it was just..so..beautiful..

the draken appereance and dialogue caused irreparable damage (the entire thing did but i needed to remark this) and i wanted to point this out honestly cause damn, the writing was immaculate. there were TEARS and im not even an draken x emma shipper cause im a selfish mf

quitting the crap, im being honest when i ask you to embrace the talent you have with words and dont ever let it go, cause it will take you places, its gift, for real.

so thank you so much for sharing it with us and also, thank you for all the feelings you awakened with your writing. excitement, despair, shyness, pure love but also pure sadness, they were all overwhelming; but that was the best part of the fic, cause all those emotions make us humans, we feel, and thats fine. right suki? you fucking nailed this.

i will never forget this story and it will take some time for me to get over it (cause for now im pretty much fucked), but i will be around reading more of your stuff cause its incredible.

good luck! take care and have a nice one, much love to you <3

*sends virtual hugs*

okay uhm, i received this the other day when i was crying a lot bcos i had a bad day and anon i was just like. speechless. left to ponder for a moment because wow like genuinely i am taken aback with your kind words. i think you dk how much this message means to me but yeah it really does mean a lot, i remember reading this for the first time and crying harder bcos i was like,,,ah life is not that bad yknow? there are good people out there who take their time sending me sweet messages and idk im sorry im just so emotional rn thank you very much 😭

is it weird that i am actually quite warmed by the thought people have lingering feelings and still think about my stories even after reading it? bcos as an avid reader, i feel that a lot. i read a piece and it hits me hard that i just carry it with me and for me, i think its a very beautiful thing that we somehow leave little pieces of ourselves to others and just...i just find it very nice and heartwarming. so yeah this ask really got me bawling BAKSKWKW. that mitsuya angst meant a lot to me 😭 oftentimes its up to my dedication to finish a fic, but that mitsuya fic was one of those fics that i wrote bcos the idea just sat heavily to me and the words were flowing, the emotions were felt and i was like. lost in that zone. so yeah i perfectly pictured them and i was extremely passionate about that certain story so knowing that people connected to something i poured my heart on - and that you really took the time to let me know your thoughts - it reallt does make me happy and just so ?? IDK THE WORD IM AWKWARD UH WHAT ARE WORDS BUT BASICALLY it just,,,hits me deep in the heart, in a very good way !! and i could be wrong but the song i attached was talking about how two people wished that when they confess, they would be received or met halfway. ofc there’s also this HUGE fear of confessing your feelings which i am an expert of bcos i like to keep things to myself 😎 but yeah idk the fic just hits diff to me.

“everything felt real, raw.” ANOM I CANT EVEN LITERALLY EVERYTHING YOU SAID I JUST WANNA REPEAT IT OVER N OVER AGAIN IM SO GRATEFUL AAAHH PLSSS TAKE MY HEART RN 😭😭😭 and omg yes the draken appearance, i feel like he just HAD to show up again bcos someone needed to bear witness of someone’s love at least yknow ?? i feel like...silent lovers are underrated. and i just really wanted draken to carry on the precious memories of mitsuya and y/n’s gifts and feelings shown and accepted in its own way. ALSO YEAH I AGREE lmfao in fanfics i am totally draken x y/n all the way i am so sorry 😭 but when we’re talking about canon, draken x emma just hits diff lemme cry again 😭

ANON UHM TBH you literally left me speechless im kinda just sat here bumbling and fumbling and i really wish i could thank you more properly bcos uhm this message cracked my heart from the overwhelming emotions but then patched it up again and yes i love you thank you sm 😭😭😭 wish you could just read my mind so you’d know how happy i am to hear this but lemme say this again anon THANK YOU VERY MUCH 😭💕 have an even nicer day and i send all my love to you anon !!

[icecreamkink]

so i watched cobra kai all in two days and i have so many -

this show has so many cool and smart angles to it, but the same time.... its so stupid oh my god everyone is so dumb literally mr miyagi held all of the braincells in this whole universe 

like i am but at the same time i am not surprised it was made like this, bc in hindsight of course there were hordes of ppl simping over johnny lawrence ....  but it still amuses me that this is like... an Actual Official Thing

ok this will get long so cut it is

how much fun this cast has is super visible and i love it

i rly enjoy how the world was expanded ! i did grow up watching the karate kid movies, so watching how they progressed the world of the movies so organically was pretty cool. it rly feels like its the same universe

i fucking LOVE stories that are largely about a Thing. dancing ,skating, sports its just so thrilling to experience this all consuming relationship people can have with this type of activity? and martial arts are just that much more intense, so yeah, grown ass men kicking each other around at the lightest provocation and a war veteran caring so much abt teen karate is Ridiculous.... but i love it all because thats the intensity i find so thrilling

was kinda surprised with how much im missing mr. miyagi. first because, like everyone is so unhinged jesus christo, it just really throws into relief how much his character grounded the narrative of the movies. but also hes just a really great character

and on that note it rly Gets Me that the show itself aknowledges that and plays that into daniels angst and all the little ways they sorta weave myiagisms into the whole show........ im not getting emotional over this dumb karate dads show OK

related - i really miss hearing ‘daniel-san’ 🥺🥺

ACE DEGENERATE oh god oh no

they really went down the down and out johnny lawrence route huh. like i was always kinda bummed we see kreese choking him and then we never see him again in the movies, and while i love dumpster fire problematic trash himbo ck johnny, its like......................... actually really sad that his life turned out like this fjngn

everytime i hear ‘babes’ and ‘pussy’ i die a little inside. i know thats the point but i am a v cringe easy person, have mercy (ehe)

loved the way they are constantly drawing parallels between johnny and mr. myiagi of all people. hes the handy man of his building that has a bullied kid asking for help and eventually steps up to teach them karate, beats up a bunch of bullies for him, creates a friendship with said kid, estranged from family, drinks his sorrows away, surprisingly one of the least quick to anger characters (which says more about everyone else really but.... Well.), no schemes or ulterior motives hes just tryna vibe here.... oh and ofc magically heals miguel of is asthma apparently. the true disciple.. meanwhile daniel is his usual messy petty self even tho he wants to be mr myiagi so bad 

also interesting about that is how miguels character is a parallel of both johnny and daniel at the same time

overall the parallels in ck are done really well, drawing comparisons and also subverting them constantly. theyre well thought out

THE PARALELOGRAMS

fr tho, the angle being explicitly the cycle of trauma and its effects and how trumatized adults in turn traumatize kids, maliciously or not, is so interesting

but! on the flip side of that, it feels like the writers are getting in their own way @ letting the characters grow. especially this last season. theres only so many times you can do "johnny and daniel are getting along but 5mins later they are (literally) fighting over some dumbass random issue" or "johnny puts in 20% of effort with robby and then gives up" before it gets on your nerves yknow?

i see daniel no longer talks like macchio ingested 15 shots of espresso before every take and idk how to feel about that tbh

interesting tension in daniel, as in, in tkk mr miyagi was there and daniel was frankly, kind of a lil shit, this messy petty spitfire hot tempered sassy kid,(johnny lawrence voice: just... stop being so annoying) but now hes the adult, and he wants to be mr. miyagi... but hes just not, and never will be to his very core and it shakes him and in a way hes trying to find who he is now that he sees himself in a position to be a not! cobra kai figure. i kinda really like that 

plus how that relates to his cobra kai trauma. idk if the writers thought abt it Like That, i think so, but in any case, its interesting bc it seems like daniel has told everyone whod listen about johnny lawrence his Pretty Boy Karate Rival and high school and 84 cobra kai... But. no one seems to know what went on in 85 (or 86? idk) which was just so much worse

like ye og cobras were shitheads, but tkk iii is just two hours of daniel being emotionally and physically tortured. 

like, the third movie is.............chaotic, to put it nicely, and many people ignore it, but the writers clearly didnt. daniels actions are, in a way, responding so much more to the events of tkk iii than to the first movie ie. johnny himself, AND. daniel doesnt rly seem to have dealt with that trauma? he never told sam? doesnt feel like hes ever told amanda? he doesnt even say terrys name out loud? freaks Out over kreese ? the way he reacts to robbys deceit? his FACE when he walks past the new "fear does not exist in this dojo" paint or kreeses photo? hmMm i sense Pain

his fashion tho........... disappointing. where are the flower shirts daniel huh we had one (1) shirt what a tragedy STOP WEARING SUITS ALL THE TIME . also the band ts/grunge bi are a look for johnny but part of me longs for the preppy lovable 80s bully chic johnny lawrence getups

weird that they never used that last moment of karate kid where johnny kinda... snaps out of his anger and hands daniel the trophy almost in tears. like “youre alright larusso, good match” “thanks a lot”  that being their last direct interection seems like itd be perfect fruit for cobra kai but... they just dont. weird. 

especially when, the FIRST SCENE they see each other, suposedly in 30+ years, the first thing to come out of daniels mouth is QUOTE "u still got those golden locks huh?" WHO SAYS SHIT LIKE THAT DANIEL FUCKING SAN 

also amandas immediate reaction "your pretty boy rival?" like. can we talk about the fact that daniel had to have imparted to his wife the very important information that his high school bully/karate rival was like Really Cute and Fucking Hot Actually

 the writers Knew exactly what they were doing and honestly.............. power to them

tkk director voice: and billy was just so cute  

also I was thinking that daniel sounded strangely fond in that first scene, and i wonder if he developed a weird affection for johnny on the grounds that of all of his Karate Rivals johnny was actually the only one who didn’t actively tried to literally kill him

i was actually delightedly surprised with how great the chemistry between them is, like from the get go i am Invested. their rl friendship totally bleeds through and its fantastic

. granted, idiots enemies to lovers friends is my Thing so i am biased  

johnny lawrence: i am down in the dumps, i fucked up my whole life and my sons probably, largely in light of the trauma that the father figure sensei and the philosophy of my karate inflicted on me and all my friends. u know what i should do, as a traumatized, unreliable mess of an adult? teach that same philosophy to some other kids! what could go wrong! 

but really i enjoy the setup of it. i kinda like that i watched it late because, season 1 was johnny setting himself up for failure in a way and it was exciting to watch it all go to shit sjfn

Like. his heart might be in the right place, but theres just.... not a way to teach something like ‘strike hard, no mercy’ and not have it fuck up a kid 

case and point: aisha, miguel and hawk become annoying as all hell over that bullshit in the end of s1, even before shit gets truly fucked up

billys subtle panicked eyes when he sees hawk and miguel fighting dirty in the all valley was SO GOOD especially in parallel with the panic that is so visible in his face in the movie when kreese tells bobby to injure daniel and in the sweep the leg scene 

seen people question wether kreese should have returned and i absolutely think he needed to. johnny needed to realize that cobra kais fundamentals are flawed, at the root, beyond kreese himself being a toxic piece of shit 

also who are we kidding? we are here to see the tkk characters play on new playgrounds!

i get what they're doing abt kreeses backstory, ( also. cobra kai. pq eles caem nas cobras djjs sorry) but did it need to take up that much time? feels like they couldve  done it in half the run time and developed some other stories better 

martin kove has such an evil eye. i love it

love that we get a good follow up to kreese breaks johnnys trophy and tries to CHOKE HIM in the parking lot, which happened in the movie and then....................... was never mentioned again

“the gang is all back together again” aaaa u piece of SHIT 

also. terry silver is definetely appearing ha ha ha PAIN i cant wait

seen ppl say kreese was too much of a cartoon villain like..........................oh......... sweetie........... u dont even Know

interested how johnny will fit into that bc kreese was simping rly hard for johnny here. like i did not expect him to be so adamant to have him with cobra kai ... under his control, sure, but he really wants johnny by his side despite already having control of the dojo and how will terry silver self appointed jon kreeses forever simp going to feel abt that? 

like bitchs dropping by every episode like ‘joooooohnny ..... come bacc to me joooonny......... this ur last warning! for real this time johnny! i wont say it again! watch me ! im leaving johnny! im rly leaving ! im dragging a chair” and johnny is just like. dont let the door hit ya bitch it was so funny pls

and on that subject oof, johnny! doesnt! Know! he doesnt get that side of daniels cobra kai trauma. and i kind of.............. cannot wait for ck 2021 johnny lawrence to meet terry silver like. what a shit show i need a front row seat and popcorn (imagine terry tries some greasy charm and johnny just roundhouse kicks him in the teeth bc he just doest Not Have the Patience for This. glorious)

feels like we, as a society, should acknowledge that cobra kai will never die................ bc their sense of design is just chefs kiss. their name is COBRA KAI. they have sexie sleeveless black gis. theyve sneks. colorful leather jackets with embroided naja insignia, the get ppl thru the aesthetics. evil geniuses

the flashback cuts : masterpiece behavior

the other takes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the movie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the differente angles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE CLOSE UP ON JOHNNYS FACE AT THE KICK 

that scene of daniel and johnny vibing to 80s music in the car. just. oh my god. the fan wish fullfilment. no thoughts head empty.

the new characters! theyre .... good. but. idk. i really like miguel (save for the annoying phase mid s1 - end s2) and amanda, who is a damn riot and has some functioning braincells, but everyone else is       

like dont get me wrong, i dont hate anyone,its not a jane and rafael from jtv situation,  and i am interested and invested in their arcs, but i wouldnt say i like   Like them, as in, personality wise 

like, sams grappling with ptsd was rly gutting and i enjoyed that plus her slight rage issues, 

which nicely parallel torys rage issues. torys background is all over the place tho so im pretty on the fence abt her so far

robby deserves better in every way, and i like how smart and cunning and surprisingly sweet he is

hawk............... is there i guess,

 demetri is annoying in the best way possible,

 carmen is sweet but. i just feel like her character is blunted to make the johnny relationship easier. like when shes furious with him after miguels injury but then forgives him like an episode later? and then convinces him to fight for the tournament bc she had a karate epiphany off screen even tho she was always against it? meh. feels like with the plot thiccening she was swallowed and now shes like a crutch for johnny mora than anything, which is disappointing.

aisha was cool and im kinda mad she wasnt in s3, especially bc a storyline with her tory and sam was like RIGHT THERE , but also... cant say i was super super fond of her... doesnt feel like we ever spent enough time on her

moon the bi icon, 

overall its a good cast but the main draw for me remains the og cast 

the tory/sam miguel/robby Thing. enjoy how theyre Narrative Foils and i like how their stories were so dramatically entangled but oh god give me a break with the teenage love square for the love of god. if u gonna put us through that at least have the decency to not make it so straight

and honestly some sam/tory        miguel/robby romantic tension would even make more sense. just saying! 

also im not sure how i feel abt the cobra kai: red miyagi do: blue theyre going with since some of daniels most iconic looks in tkk are also red. like it was a color they (johnny and him) sorta shared. i get it, opposite but complementary but idk... a little too fire nation and water tribe for me .

 and like the cobra kai kids are so funny abt it bc their outifts grow progressively more ridiculously coordinated. its like do they group chat every morning before leaving their houses? 

robby still sticks out like that tho. he went thru an athleisure/daniel san tsleeves phase and now hes back in the bandts grunge, but his color scheme doesnt fully blend with the other cobra kais. hmmmm.

LOVED LOVED LOVED both the okinawa episode and the cobra kais easy rider episode just such good good heart aching fun

bobby is an icon. he was in tkk and he is now ck hope appears more and more

 tommy is like the most iconic background character. all his lines, freaking gold then and now. sigh :( 

the framing in the okinawa trip was so good everything was so good

i stand by the fact that kumiko was the love interest daniel had the most chemistry with and shes is overall such a joy to watch, loved to see her again, idola, fashion icon

also tkk ii is good u guys are just mean

also really enjoyed chozens role in the episode, his evolution; i love that they introduced the pressure points (ty lee the blueprint) and! the honk + karate! cousins! absolutely iconic

when kumiko reads mr miyagis letters........ oh my god, my eyes FILLED with tears, it was so heart wrenching :(( tamlyns delivery was so emotional and lovely and its so obvious everyone involved in ck has so much love and respect for pat morita and mr miyagi as character, and i adore that it exists like this electric current through the show

when we were watching i told my sister i thought that ali would be miguels big shot surgeon and ngl i am so disappointed that didnt happen. hire me cobra kai writers

also the johnny ali daniel amanda chemistry? off the charts

AND the sassy retconning of daniel and alis breakup! LMAO ‘I HOPE U DIDNT TELL MR MIYAGI IT WAS MY FAULT’ HFDJJGNKFKSD

i am preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty sure back injuries dont work like that    but oke

daniel and johnny are so good together whenever, like they never actually help the kids or get shit done and end up fighting anyway but its just so much fun when theyre hanging

JOHNNY LAWRENCE AND DANIEL LARUSSO FIGHTING TOGETHER

daniels “plan” on how to get robby to juvie was so stupid. literally were u TRYING to make him hate you. dumbass

parents at those hearing rly brave for ppl that did not do ANYTHING as their kids got involved in a karate gang war until now

“bullshit i heard u were the real bully!” i mightve screeched

this s3 ending was SO DRAMATIC omg

everyone is such a MESS go to THERAPY u unhinged motherfckers

also im sorry but uh. a richass neighborhood in california doesnt have some type of neighborhood watch? the larussos rly dont have any security at all? neighbors wont hear the sound of a damn karate brawl happening next door??? also wasnt tory all like ooo i cant go to juvie, my mom yada yada yet shes always running around town getting into fights even at the rich girls house she was kicked out of school for fighting??   ?  ??    ??        ?                ?    ?          ??                  ?    ? girl??

stop destroying the larussos house, its so pretty :((((

sam finding her center looking at mr miyagis picture...  uwu maybe

robby yelling ‘U ARE WEAAK’@  johnny \as he is easily blocking him is like.... so funny and so sad to me. sweetheart. 

also i know it was meant as ‘oh johnny pushes him and HURTS HIM’ but it just looks like robby runs himself into the lockers and IM SO SORRY I FEEL SO BAD BUT IT WAS SO FUNNY 

i like that he and tory are the cobra kai kids now. we need ppl we care abt there to not revert to a good vs evil schtick, and this is the most engaging it could be... tho it hurts that these kids cant catch a break

ah yes "lets bet some real shit on the result of this teen karate tournament bc that is always a great idea" is BACK

so daniel saves johnny from kreese..... maybe johnny will save him from terry 🧐

and dojos unite ohohoho. lets SEE how that’ll work out 

miguels face of Despair when the ck defectors and the md kids are bickering like 'this is never gonna work' : gold

also. Johnny Lawrence is gonna learn some myiagi-do karate AHAAHSJAKDFH

 ive been waiting for this moment all my lifeeee oh lawrd 

final thoughts! there are def things i hope the writers will improve on the next season, but i am very excited for it either way AND i feel like it has made me enjoy the movies even more and that is a win for a reboot/sequel to me!!

[babysizedfics]

Poor roman :( but that being said I am heka interested in 5

remus humiliates roman in front of jamal (but jamal is a sweetheart)

vote from this concept voting post!

TWs: swearing, emotional humiliation, arguing, remus is generally pretty mean in this - not "unsympathetic" but his behaviour is not ok, brief alcohol mention but it isnt a main feature

first some background info on remus and ro:

roman and remus' friend groups actually run parallel to each other by pure councidence in that theyre the same age and are both in the local queer scene

usually they only run into each other on nights out and avoid each other like the plague... until one of romans friends and one of remus' friends become a very serious couple and the friendship groups merge

remus tends to hang it over romans head whenever they argue or remus just feels like teasing him that he could so so easily spill romans secret littlespace to all his friends

and while roman claims to not care he also really doesnt want that to happen, especially the specific things remus threatens to reveal (namely him calling his cgs mommy and daddy, and his fear of the dark - which remus knows are romans biggest embarrassments)

and remus never USUALLY actually follows through on his threats, he loves to freak roman out but he doesnt mean to be intentionslly cruel.

but one night theyve had an argument recently and remus is out to hurt roman and finally follows through on his threat to reveal romans secrets. in front of jamal

((the actual incident below the cut))

all the friends are walking back from a night out, and remus hangs back from the group to talk to jamal. roman is just glaring at remus and not saying anything and holding jamals hand tightly. remus hasnt embarrassed him too bad so far, just asking jamal questions and referring to roman as his "baby brother" which is so annoying, but the thing is roman can tell hes building up to something

then suddenly remus smirks when he sees a completely pitch black side street thats theyre about to pass by, and he calls out to everyone "hey guys, there's a 24/7 mcdonalds through here and its a shortcut to the bus stop" and everyones like WOO mcdonalds and redirects to go down the side street

and romans heart pounds watching the friends all filter down the street without a second thought, theres no streetlights down there, theres light on the other side quite far away, but before that its SO DARK. and he freezes in place and jamal is tugged back by it and looks back at him. "babe, come on"

romans starting to feel shaky and he literally cant move his feet. his eyes flick between the street and remus' sadistic cocky smirk.

"whats wrong baby bro? you stuck or something?" remus leers with that stupid stupid smirk

and roman HATES him so so much

"ro, what's the matter?" jamal asks

"i- um," roman stutters, trying to keep his voice from shaking too much at the sight of his friends just having DISAPPEARED into the darkness - how are they okay with that?? "i- im not hungry"

"okay well i am, and remus said it was a shortcut anyway so-"

"i-i -- no i can't"

seraphina, romans best friend, looks back and notices whats happening and quickly jogs over (knowing roman is scared of the dark) "hey roma, it's okay we dont have to go down there" she soothes

jamal is supportive but he doesnt get it. he thinks roman is scared of criminals or smth. "i promise theres no one bad down there, hun. and i'll be right next to you the whole time, i'll protect you" and he smiles and tugs romans hand to pull him towards the side street

romans eyes quickly tear up and he panics and rambles "nononono dont please please i cant i cant" in a broken voice and plants his feet firmly on the ground, paralysed with fear

remus starts cackling "ohhhhh thats right~" as if he just remembered. "my baby brother's terrified of the dark, isn't he?"

"f*ck off, re" sera barks, standing between the twins, protective of roman

"wait, are you?" jamal asks sounding surprised. roman doesnt let himself look at him, too busy watching remus warily and knowing thats not all he has planned to embarrass roman

remus goes on, shouting out to jamal over sera's head "he's petrified!" he confirms sounding delighted. "yknow that massive blackout last summer? he cried like a baby. literally sobbing for his daddy patton to make it go away"

theres a brief silence because no, sera and jamal didnt expect remus to refer to patton as romans daddy - they both know roman calls him dad but this is a surprise.

and that one second of silence drags on for ages for roman, all he can hear is his heart pounding in his ears and remus' obnoxious laughter

he is shaking, frozen in shock rather than fear now. for all of remus' teasing threats at home, he didnt expect remus to actually do it. hes devastated and humiliated that remus told to his best friend and especially his BOYFRIEND of all ppl

and honestly he's not even thinking about the pitch black side street right now because the streetlights on the main road are blurred by tears welling in his eyes anyway

"why dont you just leave him alone!" sera hisses furiously after her mild shock

then jamal bounces back rlly stern to remus "yeah i already know about that! roman told me and it was HIS choice to tell me"

roman stares at him in disbelief but jamal is too busy staring daggers at remus to notice

remus looks suddenly offended and frowns. hes clearly hurt that the others dont think its funny "jeez youre both such bores. im just having some fun"

"youre demented if you think thats fun" seraphina growls and shoves remus away towards the sidestreet. remus rolls his eyes and runs ahead to join the others who are all oblivious to that coversation, howling with drunken laughter in the pitch black and jumping out and scaring each other

"f*cking prick" jamal calls after remus, seething

sera quickly throws a concerned look to roman "you okay?"

roman just swallows thickly and looks between seraphina and where he saw remus join the others in the pitch black. his stomach churns at the idea of remus telling more people. "i-is he gonna--"

"im on it" sera nods and starts turning around "i wont let him tell anyone else, roma, promise" then she runs ahead to keep an eye on remus and to give him and jamal some privacy

after a moment jamal turns back to roman looking so worried and holds his hands and asks very gently "babe, can you tell me how youre feeling?"

and roman is teary but he whispers "i - you stuck up for me"

jamal looks suddenly sad and cups romans cheek "of course i did"

"but you said i told you about it. i- i didnt tell you that i-" roman gulps after his voice wobbles "i didnt tell you about it"

and jamal smiles sadly and goes "i know babe... im sorry, i just didnt wanna give him any more power. it seemed like he's held that over you for a while"

suddenly the tears in romans eyes overspill and he doesnt really know why but he can't stop them

jama gasps a little "oh roman, its ok" and just pulls him into a tight hug

roman clings and sniffles, glad that he can hide his tears from his boyfriend even if it is in his neck.

and jamal just strokes his back and whispers "its ok baby, its ok" **

they talk about it quietly as they take the longer, well-lit route instead. roman admits he would never have told jamal abt his fear on his own - and the reason he's been avoiding staying overnight at jamals apartment is bc the one time he did he got so scared of the dark that he couldnt sleep and was just anxious all night but wouldnt wake jamal to tell him

after jamal finds out hes like baby why didnt u tell me its okay and comforts him about it not being embarrassing or childish. then:

"so you do actually want to stay at mine, its just because its so dark that you didnt?"

roman nods shyly "yeah... im sorry i know its a dumb fear i just-"

"its not dumb ro. i meant to say if it works for you, we could leave the hall light on and the door open. its not like i live with anyone who can walk in."

roman blinks "wait you - really? it wont make it hard for you to sleep?"

jamal smiles softly "no hun, honestly i could sleep anywhere. i fell asleep in the middle of the day in the staffroom just last month"

roman laughs, so so so relieved

"so... maybe next time you come over for dinner you could stay the night, yeah?" jamal says with a smile and a blush. he wraps his arm around romans waist and pulls him in, hip to hip

roman bites his lip and blushes. after a moment he suggests shyly "im free tonight..."

and jamal smiles so big, stops walking and puts his arm up to romans chest to stop him too then angles romans jaw down to kiss him

in the near future jamal promises to buy a plain nightlight and always leaves it on for roman when he stays overnight from then on

**side note: roman could never stand anyone calling him baby before because he felt infantilised at school becaus of his undiagnosed adhd. so he sees it as a derogatory name more than anything. but when jamal says it roman feels so warm and respected because he knows jamal would never mean it in that way. so jamal has "baby" rights basically

[darkmulti]

Hell Hole Final

incubus!Seonghwa and San x Female reader

⚠️Warnings: threesome, anal, rough sex, dacryphilia, somnophilia, sadism, degradation, choking, bondage, bdsm, overstimulation, spanking, slapping, spitting, fear kink, knife play (seonghwa goes crazy yall), oral (fem receiving), really aggressive smut, blood licking i guess, yall already know some kinky ass incubus shit, that was really requested for some reason , a little violence

THIS CONTAINS NON CONSENSUAL SEX! PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Final

One and two on masterlist 

——————————————————————————

Currently, you were waiting for San’s arrival. Sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels, patiently waiting.

Your relationship with San was at its strongest point. You were treated like a princess every single day. San now had the biggest effect on you, every time you saw him your heart melted. He turned into such a nice and caring boyfriend.

While you were in ‘awe’ of your boyfriend, the demon standing behind you wasn’t very happy.

Seonghwa, was the one who found you and brought you back. But somehow you ended up with San. How was that fair? He was supposed to be the one to treat you like a princess and give all of his love.

Jealousy takes over the heartbroken demon and without fully thinking Seonghwa snatches you from behind and takes you to his house.

As soon you arrive, he knocks you out and brings you to his little sex dungeon. Harshly taking your limbs and tying them down on each corner on the bed, making you look like an ‘X’.

Seonghwa shoves in a vibrator into your unconscious body and leaves.

———

Meanwhile, San arrives home, only to be not greeted by his precious angel.

San starts calling your name and heads upstairs thinking that you’re gonna surprise him. But to his surprise, you weren’t there. Now he thought you were playing some cruel joke.

This was not normal for you to do. You would’ve already come out and greeted San already. San starts to panic and runs around the entire house looking for you. His eyes start to fill up with tears and his non existenting heart aches at the thought of losing you.

“Angel, stop playing it isn’t funny anymore! Y/N! Seriously stop!”

San stops in his tracks.

You weren’t at home anymore.

He thinks deeply, you’re still in hell and you can’t escape, which means someone must’ve taken you. Well that ‘someone’ will regret because no one touches his angel. San will kill them, even if they’re already dead.

————

“Seonghwa please!”

Seonghwa’s tongue flicked on your clit making you cum for the 10th time. Your body lurches up and you cry out feeling your clit on fire.

“Stop acting like you don’t love it whore. Just tell me that I can fuck you better then San and I’m the only one for you. Then it will all be over.”

He said it as if it wasn’t a big deal. You couldn’t leave San, you loved him.

“Y/N Y/N Y/N. You know what I absolutely hate? When people don’t obey me. Especially if they’re dumb, little girls like you. Saying that you love another demon while I stand here and listen. How do you think this makes me feel?”

Tears left the corner of your eyes and slid down.

“I-I-I’mmm s-s-s-sor-ry”

You were violently shaking, petrified of his presence.

A sharp noise comes from Seonghwa’s hand. You focus and see it’s a knife.

“No no no don’t kill me! I'll submit!”

You pleaded.

“Silly, dumb slut. Why would you think that I will do such a thing? I love you. By the end of this you would’ve submitted to me either way, so why not have a bit of fun? Try something new, yknow?”

Seonghwa comes closer and glides the shiny and sharp, six inch blade across your cheek, down to your throat and around your breast.

You tightly shut your eyes, not wanting to see, and Seonghwa slaps you across the face.

“Open your eyes and watch. How about… I make a little cut here below your belly button.”

Seonghwa puts the slightest force on the knife and easily cuts into you, but not too deep. You scream out and start to cry uncontrollably. You beg Seonghwa to stop but he responded with

“Why should I stop? I love you screams and cries and I FUCKING love that IM causing them. This will teach you that youre MINE AND I FUCKING OWN YOU, YOU COCK SUCKING CUM FUCK!”

He shouted at you and his eyes turned red.

You didn’t mumble a word. You just laid there, helplessly, praying for a miracle to happen.

Seonghwa threw the knife against the concrete wall, hard enough the knife plunged into it.

In a breath his clothes disappear and he gets on top of you. With absolutely no mercy he pounds into your sensitive pussy and you sob even harder. Your breath hitching with every thrust. His cock going fully out and slamming back into you.

Seonghwa unleashes the beast and his black horns make its way out. He was going to fuck you until you were mentally attached to him.

He started to thrust into you at an inhuman speed. You pull on your restraints, wanting out and crying rivers. Seonghwa then spits on you and slaps your face.

“Your tears are getting you nowhere, babygirl. They’re just getting me harder.”

He growled, now roughly pulling your throat and pounding harder into you.

“I’m gonna cum!”

You yelp as tears started to roll down your eyes again. Cum spits out of your pussy around his cock, and you lose all feeling in your lower half.

He pulls out of you, and smacks your thighs, then licks off the blood from your stomach.

“Your blood taste fucking delicious.”

The cut was stinging after he licked it. You hiss out in pain, and Seonghwa immediately heals the cut.

“There, now it’s gone and I can cut you again and again.”

A sadist smile places on his face. You didn’t even try to fight anymore. You couldn’t take down Seonghwa. That would be impossible.

You begin to lose yourself in your thoughts, until you notice a distressed Seonghwa. He was backing up towards the wall and San appeared out of nowhere.

San’s eyes were red and he pushed Seonghwa against the wall and started beating the shit out of the other male.

San then grabbed him by the throat and slammed his nude body against the wall, choking him.

“WHY THE FUCK DID YOU KIDNAP MY GIRLFRIEND? WHAT DID YOU FUCKING DO WITH HER?”

He yells out furiously, tightening his grip even more.

A sinister smirk laid on his face and he didn’t say a word.

San then let him go and went right to you.

“Baby are you okay? Oh look at you angel, I’m so sorry I didn’t find you earlier. Look at what he did to you.”

He rubs your cheeks looking at you with sorrowful eyes.

“SAN LOOKOUT!”

Seonghwa punches San in the face.

“Look at what she did to you little bro! You’re so soft for her. What happened to that cruel, sadist San in you huh? Are you too weak now? Because you fell in love?! We’re demons! Loves not meant for us, only sex! You’re breaking all these rules, and father will be mad at us! Look at her! She’s a dumb cunt.”

Seonghwa pushes San back, wanting to make him angry.

“Seonghwa stop!”

San growled and his eyes started to turn black.

“I’m not going to stop. This cock slut has broken us apart. Don’t you think she deserves a punishment?”

They both start walking towards you. Seonghwa’s eyes were red and San’s was pitch black.

Seonghwa gets on top of you and takes you again. In the corner of your eyes you see San trying to calm down. He looks up and you both make immediate eye contact and he walks toward you, stripping himself as well.

He kneels down gripping your throat and making you look at him.

“You like this huh? Fucking my older brother behind my back? How long have you been doing this slut?”

“Daddy no! I’ve never done it, he forced me! Please I wouldn’t do that to you.”

Seonghwa gives a quick lick on his fingers and slaps you across the face.

“She’s lying. We’re been fucking every week.”

“He’s lying San! I never did such a thing!”

Seonghwa picks up his pace and hits you gspot making you gasp up.

“Look at how good I’m making her feel. She’s shaking because of my cock San.”

Seonghwa leans down and licks your face. Afterward he opens your mouth and spits in it.

“See. She’s even swallowing my spit.”

You didn’t even swallow it. Instead you spit it back up, and try your best not to choke. A tight knot starts to form in your core and your climax hits. You quiver under seonghwa and cum once again.

San then gets up and pushes Seonghwa out of the way. He dips down and starts to eat you out.

You let out a scream of pain, and San started to suck on your clitoris and finger you. You squirm around, trying to find some pleasure, but you just couldn’t!

San stops and takes the restraints off your ankles.

“All fours now!”

You struggle to flip yourself over, because you can't feel your lower half. It was extremely sore. Seonghwa comes over and helps you out.

As soon as your ass was in front of San. He rammed into your asshole and spanks your ass.

You shiver at the sudden feeling. The hairs on your body go up and seonghwa crawls underneath you, sliding his cock into your pussy once again.

You start bawling your eyes out. You couldn’t take both of them. You struggle and pull on the ropes your hands were tied to.

Seonghwa smacks you face a couple of times and starts to kiss you lips and cheek.

The two demon cock were rubbing inside of you.

The demon below you takes the restraints off of your hands and San pulls you up. You uncontrollably start to move your hips on Seonghwas dick, riding him. San wraps his hands around you and makes you look back at him. He spits on your face and starts to lick you.

They were both so close. You felt their 9 inch dicks twitch inside you. The older demons dick, repeatedly thrusted in your gspot making you cum one last time.

The facial expression you held while cumming made both of them cum deep inside you.

“Ahhh, good girl, good girl, cum all over us.”

San whispers in your ears.

Seonghwa moves out the way and you collapse on the bed.

“I guess we can share her.”

San says bitterly.

“I’m glad we came to an agreement. Now she’s trapped in the hell hole with us.”

——————————————————————————

People seem to really like hell hole so I made a final part❣️ I originally wanted to kill Y/N for this last part but didn’t, bc I then realized she’s already sorta like.....dead. Anyways I hoped you enjoyed❣️

[gemsofthegalaxy]

NOTE: i wrote this post on sunday because its really hard not to liveblog somehow so this is just. all my reactions in one post. most of it is under the cut and its like nonsense but oh well. 

Omg I started writing a reaction post and immediately discarded it by accident but

THE FLIRTATIOUS BANTER IM FUCKING DYING

Only a few seconds in and we get a LOVE already I'm..... jesus.....

"Happy?" "Much more often than usual these days." PETER THANK YOU FOR REVEALING SOMETHING REAL. I'm!!!

Peter stop being sus challenge

JUNO NARRATION JUNO NARRATION

WE HAVE OUR WIFE BACK FOLKS!

HHHhhhhHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Juno with the secret medical thing??? ONE fear.

Swamp? RAD BOUQUET mind is alert but.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm.

Juno is secretly the alien gf we wanted all along.

Hhhh cmp..... so. Weird. I bet the CMP reacts weird when Juno looks because he has something it can cure.

gshshshsus what did juno think Vespa wanted to

What the fuck is Pudding?? I need to Know. OH we get the answer.

VESPA LIKING JUNO HOURS YEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS. VESPA BEING PROTECTIVE OVER JUNO!! ITS 12 MINUTES IN AND I HAD TO PAUSE IT TO SCREAM LIKE 3 TIMES.

I am so fucking happy for Juno and Vespa to be getting along.

FIANCEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

"That was almost nice Vespa" oh my god Vespa is precious I love her so fucking much I love my tough love mom!!!!!! God!!!!

juno knowing a lot about peter. Knowing hes hurting. Peter letting juno know he's hurting more and more???

THE RETURN OF YOUR BETTER HALF!!! Fuck yes.

RITAAAAAAAAA YESSSSSSSS. Shes so excited!! I love her so much. "You know I'm not the one getting married right?" NOT WITH THAT ATTITUDE. Rita offering to watch Bad Cops 3!!!!! Omgggggg.

Also confirmed that Rita talks through movies is the best tho I always write Juno being just as bad asfshshsjsk.

"This thief will never be free again?" Ominous. Even for movie dialogue. Hmmmmmm

LMFAO SO THAT ONES FOR JET.

Awwhhh I'm so glad Juno stuck around to watch streams with Rita. I'm crying..... the sibling energy... I also feel VINDICATION! Because I write them doing shit like that whenever i can.

Rita.... cares so much about Juno and also his relationship....

Rita. Friend proposal??? Oh my god. Rita thinks Juno is gonna leave her for Peter I'm????!!!!! Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I need a Minute. You could say. A rita minute. I'm....hhhhhhh.....

WE GOT CONFIRMED I LOVE YOUS FROM RITA AND JUNO

This is NOT A DRILL. MOM HOLY FUCK.

Nureyev is so jumpy.

Juno admitting doubting Nureyev like Ouchie. It doesnt surprise me that Juno hasnt asked about Mag but also like.

Jet is so fucking Funny. I love him SO MUCH god. what a little troll.

God. Buddy's dad is a prison owner??? Yeesh...

Jet is SUCH A TROLL. I love him So much.

Ooh. Questions about What Comes Next hmmm???? I really do wonder what Juno will do after this.

Juno. Mature?? Lmao!! So fucking hilarious.

I love Juno being confirmed as having trouble sleeping usually huge mood.

Also hilarious.

AHHHHH YES JUNO AND BUDDY AT THE SHOOTING RANGE!!!! YEEESSSSS.

MOM!!!!!

Buddy are you like. Doing okay? I love you so much please tell us you're okay? Please.

I was not expecting Juno and Buddy to be Bickering while Juno's interaction with Vespa was so lowkey sweet.

AHHHHH CONFIRMED STUFF ABOUT DIAMOND!

Also juno... worried that he isnt scared Enough... I'm... that's so valid. I'm crying.

What the hell is Buddy talking about lmao. I do love her but honestly a mundane life isn't that bad? You still struggle and experience wins even if you're not. Yknow. A space pirate.

I do get like. Numbing yourself and just remaining content with life is definitely like not ideal or whatever but the concepts seem a bit

"Who was my first love?" iMMMMM

Its amazing how Its really like Juno and Peter are the ones who are getting married Lmaoooooooo they're such loveable dorks I fucking Cannot.

Omg Jet waxing poetic about how they are all connected and even if they are apart they are still connected I am fucking Dying scoob.

Vespa's VOWS!!!! I'm... I cant fucking... I love her I love her I love her

I Adore how they Met that is so fucking funny and amazing. I cant handle this. I love them. They are fucking Iconic.

They are better as a PAIR I am screaming. High pitched noises are coming out from my mouth.

BUDDY. WHO ALWAYS PREPARES HER SPEECHES. TALKING FROM THE HEART??? I'm cryinnnnnngggggg

Oh my god our speaker almost died I'm Fsgsfshsgshshsn.

Their ceremony was so beautiful I'm actually. Fucking dying. They're so. I can't.

Nureyev looking at Juno as he plays the song for Buddy and Vespa's wedding I am fucking dying I cant.

HE WANTS THEM TO KNOW EACH OTHER. HE WANTS TO BE VULNERABLE WITH PETER. I AM SCREECHING.

Juno wants to TRUST NUREYEV.

Juno LOVES PETER NUREYEV. I am dying.

DARK MATTERS CRASHING THE WEDDING CONFIRMED......

.....SASHA WIRE....

[misstrashchan]

So just as a heads up, this is a continuation of this post about which of Smirke's 14 Fears from the Magnus Archives team RWBY+Pyrrha would be aligned with and @im-the-king-of-the-ocean asking my thoughts on Winter, Ozpin and Oscar (sorry it took so long to get back to this! I've had it sitting in my drafts for a while)

Winter: The Slaughter

Winter as an Avatar of the Slaughter is something I hadn't thought of but it actually fits insanely well. The Slaughter does often bring up the question of whether anger and violence is just senseless and mindless, or following orders followed by rationalisation; or if we're entirely conscious of the choices we're making, and which is worse, which is something that Winter's arc has been dealing with A LOT. In how she follows Ironwood's orders and has to rationalise his actions to justify her own and her "choices", like how she explains to Weiss how she accepts her role as the Winter Maiden being her destiny, though it was something Ironwood groomed her into and how she tries to explain to Penny why they have to internalise however they might feel about abandoning Mantle and trust Ironwood.

There's the element of anger which you bring up, and Winter's relationship with anger is interesting to me to think about, because she seems very much afraid in indulging that emotion, or any emotion, and because of the military industrial complex and her abusive controlling upbringing, leads to a lot of emotional suppression and refusal to think on those feelings or deal with them in any healthy way. Which of course leads to everything boiling over, and there's this. Rage, an passionate fury that's boiling inside her. But I wouldn't say it's something she thinks she needs or enjoys right now, quite the opposite. (the idea of being afraid of being hurt, of needing to have control of her situation and to throw back her hurt of the world fits more with Cinder than Winter in my mind, and I think Melanie's relationship with anger and needing it reminds me a lot more of Yang. It justified her need for it and fed into it, and Melanie liked that, she wanted it, but for Winter her anger is something she's ashamed of, something to be locked away)

But I actually do think with where her arc is headed that thinks she will come to indulge in that feeling more. The one time we see her have an angry outburst expressing her true feelings is at Jaques at his dinner party, and she scolds and shames herself for allowing herself to get angry, that it was childish and immature. To which Penny disagrees, saying she thought she was just speaking from the heart. But Winter believes that to precisely be the problem. She cannot allow herself to think, or feel just for herself,  because that terrifies her. So she only allows herself to follow orders. Again, similar to a lot of the Slaughter statement givers who were soldiers in wars of some kind and become numb to the atrocities they are made to commit, the sensless violence of it all, but her choice to accept her lack of agency and self worth still makes her complicit and is still a conscious decision on her part. This sort of meandered and I'm not sure if it made any sense but yes, I hadn't thought of it but the Slaughter actually fits Winter really well for a lot of reasons. And I think we will see her Go Feral in the near future, the thing she's most afraid of, showing how she really feels, and oh boi all that confusion, emotional repression, the lingering bitterness and jealousy towards Penny being the Winter Maiden, and projected feelings of thinking of leaving or betraying Ironwood she's been having and her conflicted feelings pushed onto Weiss, who betrayed and left first, just a whole over boiling pot that's a mess of emotions manifesting as Big Feral Winter Feelings. 

Ozpin:

The Eye, Ceaseless Watcher, Beholding/The Vast, the Falling Titan, Awful Deep

Ohohohoho Ozpin. I can't tell you how many times I've listened to TMA 151 imagining Ozpin as Simon Fairchild or vice versa. Simon's VA was told that his character had to give off the impression that he might offer you a plate of cookies or fling you off a cliff and when I heard that my mind immediately jumped to Ozpin back in v1. And Ozpin's VA said that if he didn't have the weight of the world on his shoulders, he'd be a lot more chaotic and fun. And that's the thing with Ozpin though, is that he wants to be Simon Fairchild, so so badly. I think he wants people to see him as that kind of person too. But in reality, he's stuck being Jonathan Sims. (The Ceaseless Watcher's/God of Light's Special Little Boy assdkjhkk) Oz is 100% an Eye Avatar. Fair warning, like with Ruby and the End, I have a lot of Big Feelings with this one. 

I see where you're coming from, but the thing with being an Avatar of the Vast is being so overwhelmed by the expanse and eternity of everything that you just accept your own insignificance as well as everyone else's, hence why they rarely form attachments or work with others. It's a very nihilistic perspective that it's Avatars tend to be very hedonistic as a result, we're all insignificant, nothing matters, let's just do whatever we want and try to have a good time, who cares what happens. And I do think Oz is Vast aligned, since he encourages the people around him, and tries himself, to enjoy the little things and have fun when he can, since he knows Salem is unstoppable and everything could go to shit at any given moment. And yknow. Him enjoying flinging students off of cliffs during initiation a bit too much.

 But Ozpin cares so much about humanity. He desperately wants to believe, and tries to, in humanity, and tries for them. He's been fighting so hard for so long, and believes humanity is worth fighting for (even if he has trouble actually having faith and believing in them). Everything matters to him. He agonises over every choice he makes and impact that has, takes on so much responsibility on himself, is so guilt ridden that he admits to making "more mistakes than any man, woman or child on this planet" that he practically paralyses himself with indecision and guilt. He’s also someone who has been shown to be paranoid, (his reluctance to fully trust the people around him out of constant wariness that he may be betrayed) and afraid of being perceived for who he truly is and having his secrets exposed, which are all very Eye related fears. Ozpin’s very much in this position in which he is the one who knows everything, who passively watches and waits and knows, from up high in his tower. “Oh please, your god is nothing! The Eye, Beholding, Ceaseless Watcher, whatever you call it, that’s all it does, it watches and knows, sitting bulbous and comfortable in the ignorance of infinite knowledge.” (TMA 89) In the Lost Fable, he believed he needed to be the one to know everything (think to how he only trusted himself to hold onto the relic of knowledge, believing it to be “his burden to bear” and was desperate to take it back from Ruby) and as shown in his past lives, sought after Jinn’s knowledge in the belief that knowledge would help him in his cause, only for the ultimatum of the answer in “Salem can’t be killed” to break him and make him lose all hope of doing anything more than maintaining a perpetual stalemate. In the words of his speech in vol1, in which is a very good example of Ozpin desperately needing to practice what he preaches; 

 “I'll...keep this brief. You have travelled here today in search of knowledge--to hone your craft and acquire new skills. And when you have finished, you plan to dedicate your life to the protection of the people. But I look amongst you, and all I see is wasted energy, in need of purpose – direction. You assume knowledge will free you of this, but your time at this school will prove that knowledge can only carry you so far. It is up to you to take the first step”  (RWBY 1x03) 

There’s also like. A lot of Eye statements, particularly those relating to Jonathan, that relate heavily to Ozpin and his character, including this one:

“And at last, the Archivist looks up. At last, he looks into the eye that sees all, and knows all, and clutches at the secret terrors of your heart. The Ceaseless Watcher of all that is, and all that was; the voracious, infinite hunger that tears at his soul, invoking him to discover, to observe, to experience all, and everything, and forever. It stares into him, and it stares out of him, and he is falling into the devouring eternity of its pupil. He wants to cry out in horror, but he cannot. 

He. Is. Whole. 

And still he does not wake. Wandering his slim collection of gifted nightmares, passing the grey and lifeless remains of severed dreams he can no longer watch, he waits- but not for long- before they can all begin again”

Like if that doesn’t describe Oz’s endless reincarnation and merging, becoming “whole”, and living all these lives is discovering, observing and “experiencing all and forever” then I don’t know what does. And then there’s the last statement we had before the s5 break, also an Eye one, revolving around the “Minister” which also gives off major Oz vibes:

God, the children. They won’t stop looking, won’t stop following him with their piteous, desperate gaze that speaks so loudly his knees feel like they will buckle. ‘Help us.’He will. Of course he will. He wants to. He hasn’t lied to them, he really hasn’t. He used to be one of them, he remembers what it can be like. He is there to speak for them. And if necessary, he will join them again. The minister grips his black leather briefcase closely to his chest, bile rising in his throat at the sudden jolt of fear that races through his veins. Where did that come from? Is he afraid of it, returning, of that sharp stab of hunger, the shivering of a cold you can’t escape? Or is he afraid that should it come to that, they will see him as a deceiver?” 

“On his side of the arena the shouts should be sharper, more angry, but their tone and pitch are such as to merge seamlessly with the others. There are no golden stakes on this side pinning down his would-be comrades. But the minister must be careful not to look too closely, or else he might see how many of his allies are fused to their own chairs, on which they have sat comfortable for so long"

"His eyes drift away, through the walls to the crowd outside. Their baying cries for justice cannot be heard in here. If any whisper should make it through, it is utterly destroyed in the deafening shouting that surrounds him. But he cannot forget their eyes, watching him, piercing him with their wounded humanity.” 

Another thing is that one of Ozpin’s allusions aside from the Wizard of Oz is Odin, and Raven and Qrow are meant to be his Huginn and Muninn, two Ravens that act as his “eyes” spying and gathering information for him. If you look at Raven and Qrow’s emblem, they have a left and right bird’s eye respectively, with Oz’s gear emblem inside the eye. In v4, Salem, upon hearing that Tyrian poisoned Qrow, says “the last eye is blinded” as in,the belief that with Raven having left Oz and Qrow now dying, Oz would have no more eyes to “see” with. You also have Jonah Magnus, whose corpse is missing his eyes, but is able to watch through the eyes of the Archive employees. That and the whole body hopping host thing is a little similar in concept (and Peter Lukas mentions near the end of s4 that if Elias died, Jonah would have chosen Jon as his new host which is just. Terrifying). There's a lot of other little things too, like Oz in the first three volumes is usually shown watching events like the iniitiation, the fight at the docks, and the vytal festival through his cameras in his office, a passive observer rather than someone who is actively involved. And Yang at the end of v6, when Oscar tells them about Oz saving him, says "so he's just been watching is that whole time?" The underlying tone suggesting that he could've come back at any tike but chose to watch them instead, through Oscar, and everyone looking at him like that's pretty weird or creepy (except Ruby tho, because she's Ruby)

I feel like I could go on, but this is probably waaaaay too long, so, in summary, Oz serves the Eye, is basically a perfect candidate for the Archivist, and is also Vast aligned, and in different circumstances would have totally been a great Vast Avatar. 

Oscar: The Spider, the Web, Mother of Puppets

Oscar. Was. HARD.

This lil shit is part of the reason it took so long to make this post. Because see, with other characters the most obvious indicators would be their semblances (which are often manifestations of coping mechanisms for their personal fears or trauma) or songs (which delve deeper into their characters), or have very specific fears that I can focus in on as to how that factors into their arc. But Oscar? He doesn't have a semblance. His whole THING is that he's scared. All the time. His song is called Fear for Pete's sake. Now, he is Oz's reincarnation, and Oscar does also share a fair few things in common with the Archivist and his character arc, (Elias's plan and the whole plot of the first four seasons was that he was trying to align Jon by having him touched by ALL the fears, aka, to fill Jon with fear of everything, so that he became a walking living record of fear) he persistently calls out people's BS and takes issue with people withholding information, also similar to Yang (who I firmly believe is Eye aligned). So like. Eye, right? But that just... doesn't properly fit Oscar. He's not Ozpin. The Stranger, then, becoming a stranger to yourself, perhaps? That is something Oscar's afraid of, right?

"Everything changes when you see a stranger, feel proud or betrayed" (Fear)

But Oscar is growing more confident in his own identity and figuring out who he is. He’s not becoming Oz, he's becoming his own person. And even if he was becoming Oz, Oz is hardly a Stranger to Oscar. The merge, from how it's described in the show, seems more similar to how the Distortion functioned, except Oscar and Oz don't fit into most of the Distortion's themes.

I was sort of uncertain, and I wanted to wait and see till I was more certain of where Oscar's arc was headed this volume, since he's being pushed to his limits and wanted to see how he acted and what choices he made. At the start, because of how he was regretting all the choices he'd made previously, and was telling Oz how badly he didn't want the merge to happen, I was speculating about the possibility of him being manipulated by Salem and Grimm!Oscar happening, which might fall him into the Corruption, but no.

Oscar is the Web.

It fits with his fear of being controlled, of his will not being his own, and like Jonathan, who was marked and scared for life by his encounter with the Web as a child, it is his greatest fear. Only, where Jon was so afraid of the Web he sought the Eye as his refuge, believing it would keep him safe, Oscar realises that can be used to his advantage. (Which actually makes him more like Anabella Cane, which is. Hilarious) He's trying to do what Salem does, focus in on people's weaknesses and fears and dig at them, manipulate and push them, divide them, only like, steering them into the opposite direction than Salem. He's trying to use the fact that people see him as Oz to his advantage and trying to manipulate their impression of him. He's just got this very sneaky, cunning and pragmatic streak in him that people overlook because he's also incredibly kind and just. Good. But those qualities very much scream "Web" to me the more I've dwelled on it.

[klariwitch]

You’ll Love Me Again

No one ever really mentioned all the symptoms that comes with heartbreak. For one, your heart quite literally hurt. It burned. Not in the sorts that felt like heart burn, but more so like it was falling. The feeling of weightlessness. Yet, at the same time you felt as heavy as can be. From there its just full on misery. Y’know how people will say they feel like they just got hit by a truck? Yeah. Yeah its that.

“I’m uh, how do i put this without you going all vigilante mode on me? I’m into your sister,” Kon was grinning stupidly now.

Oh!

oh.

Tim felt his heart sink and then the nausea began to settle in.

“My? My what?” Tim shook his head in disbelief. Kon didn’t like him. He liked-

“Cass. Kon likes Cass, Steph,”

“Yknow when I see him next, you best believe I’m bringing that kryptonite ring, I’m gonna-“

“I feel sick to my fucking stomach,” the Robin sobbed over the phone. 

read the rest on ao3

The answering voice sighed. She still felt the shock of Tim crying on the phone with her, about a boy of all things. And, although the she wanted to slap the living shit out of the both of them, she also knew it was best to be calm and to let him cry on. “I know, I feel you Timmy, been there, done that,” she gave the phone a sad smile.

“I can’t even comprehend how that’s a thing. Seriously, Steph, how?!” His eyes seemed to bulge, one step closer to completely freaking out. He laid back on his bed, the phone still close to pressing against his ear, and salted tears running down his reddened cheeks.

He was a bat. A detective. Trained by old comics and the world’s greatest himself, batman. So, how on earth was he feeling so sunk by all these emotions? Why so much all this once? How was he to cry over the phone to Stephanie Brown over not just a boy, but the superboy. And, not just because he didn’t like him back—no, that wasn’t even able to be gotten out—but because he planned to ask out Tim’s own sister.

“Could my life really get anymore amusing, Steph? This is fucking humiliating,”

“Tim, I’m seriously so sorry this just all around sucks. Were you really planning on telling him, though?” The voice questioned over the device.

“Yes,” the boy cringed, “ I had a whole speech planned out to tell him tonight. Talk about bad timing,” his breath slowed. Without all the tears now, he felt tired. So completely drained for ever believing his best friend would ever see him much more than just that. Best friends.

“Why don’t you just spend some time away from him? Not exactly to cut off all contact, but more so just hanging out less? Maybe start making up excuses like Bruce needs you working on a case more, or that your parents have been home?” She suggested.

Actually, it wasn’t the worst idea, either. Kon would be okay with him being busy, and in the meantime he would take that step back and convince himself Kon wasn’t really the one.

“You’re right,”

“I am, aren’t I? Y’know it actually feels really nice to hear you say that for once, maybe just once more?” The girl pressed playfully.

He scoffed. “Yeah wouldn’t you like that?” The Robins teased one another, after all she could always make him feel better. “Alright, I think I have to call it a night. I’m gonna go throw up and then to bed.” He wasn’t lying, either. For whatever reason after speaking to Conner his head hurt like hell and his stomach carried what felt like a flu virus.

“Goodnight, Tim,”

“Night, Steph,”

               *****

“Well,”

“Well?”

“It’s been about a month,”

“Tim,”

“I think I’m actually okay this time. I don’t feel so achey around him anymore! I told you we met up after patrol tonight!” The boy exclaimed over the line, a smile captured on his lips.

“Okay, so, it went alright, then?” Steph asked. She cringed a bit. No way his feelings where just poof gone.

“Steph, it went great,” assured Tim. “I think we plan on doing the same thing tomorrow...it just nice to have my best friend back, yknow?”

“Tim, it’s really okay if you still need time, you know that, right?”

“Steph. I promise. I’m okay, my feelings for Kon are completely gone,”

*****

“You’re here on time” the boy in front of him called. A small chuckle arose, “did bats let you off early?”

“Yes, actually, how’d you know?” Tim smiled. He sat down right beside him on the edge of the rooftop. Ironically, sitting on top of a fifteen story building, next to a superhuman somehow managed to be the spot he always felt the safest. He assumed, it was all about the trust. All about a matter of not having to worry that Kon might decide to push him overboard unexpectedly, or even if the building suddenly gave out. The only fault there was, why did he still have that trust for him? Admittedly, Kon had never exactly tried to send him soaring off a rooftop, but wasn’t heart break a close equivalent?

“Tim?” The familiar hand waved in his face. Tim carefully swatted it away.

“What?”

“I asked you how your day was?”

“Oh,” Tim nodded. He even looked down as if his fingers might curate him the perfect move. Spoiler alert: they did not. “It was…well, I mean kind of slow? Patrol and all that,” the last bit came out as a mutter. Why was he there, again? Honestly, he couldn’t even look at him now. He had thought he was fine, really he did, but what exactly did fine mean? Ignorance, in this case.

The only problem was, he just couldn’t let go. In movies and literature it was always so much easier, because it just always works out for them. They have a promised happy ending. For Tim, none of that was a guarantee.

It was like..insurance. insurance that he did not have. Because, even when the character didn’t end up with their love, they still found something great—like a new person or happiness. And now, all happiness was looking like without Kon was a cold bottle of chardonnay stolen from his mother’s wine cabinet.

“Are you okay?” Kon asked then. His face carried worry and all kinds of fear.

Shit

shit

‘Don’t make me lie to you’ The shorter boy thought. He didn’t want to, it honestly wasn’t something he could find the energy for anymore. “I, uh,” he felt his phone vibrate under his thigh. He didn’t answer it, it would only be Steph wanting to know what was happening.

“What is it, Rob? Spit it out,” the meta pushed, a cheerful smile forming his face.

“I…don’t think I can?” Answered Tim.

“Huh, well, why not? Its okay, you know you can tell me anything, right?”

The raven haired boy just stared at him, mouth split open stupidly. “Right! Right. Yes, I know that,” he nodded.

“So?”

“Right…” he bit his lip till blood arose and the feeling of confidence came beside it. “Could I, show you, instead?” He requested.

“Sure? I mean, yeah. Of course you can, anything that helps,” Kon nodded willingly.  

Was he really going to do that? Where was some sort of memory wiper when you needed it? He’d do anything to redo the last ten minutes.

He sighed. Was he really about to do this? In all fairness, he had been wanting to for some time. Okay, he’d do it. Okay. Maybe not? “Y’know what?” Tim turned. they were closer than he had thought they were. No going back now, right? He laughed sickly, “fuck it.” Evenly, his face melted to a smile as he leaned him, pressing his lips ever so gently against Kon’s.

He couldn’t believe it. He was kissing Kon. His best friend. The boy who unknowingly broke his heart just months ago. This was...unbelievable. It always seemed like it was so incredibly out of reach and get here he was now, kissing him. Did that mean Kon really did like-

“Woah,” and just like that he was pushed away. He’d have to fight through the tears at an arms length distance now. “Hey, sorry, Tim I’m flattered, really, it’s just-“

“Okay, look, I probably should have waited, I just, I don’t know? Ever since you were talking about Cass I just couldn’t get you off my mind, and that’s why I stayed away for so long. Look, most people can just watch, too Kon. Most can just love from afar and wait. Im sorry, but I can’t do that. Im not that person, okay? I’m selfish. So selfish. I hate that I am and i’m sorry, but I can’t just watch, okay? I can’t,” Tim heaved a breath. He wanted to get it all out so bad and now he had spoiled the vibe. “Im sorry to burst your perfect little bubble, I just fucking can’t. Now I see it was a mistake too, because i thought you liked me back. I really did,” his lip bled. Biting too hard again? “You just don’t get it, okay? We’re supposed to be together. Everyone thinks so. We’re best friends, Kon. We’re the beautiful love story. Look, I’ve been telling myself that forever, and you’re just supposed to feel the same,” he shrugged. Just as if it was no big deal.

Kon groaned. He considered for a moment to grab ok to his hands but for obvious reasons that wasn’t exactly appropriate. “Tim. Hey, you don’t have to apologize. Im glad you told me. To be honest, I kind of like you too,”

“Wait, really?” Tim smiled, searching the meta’s face for any truth.

“What? Are you even listening to me? Tim, I’m sorry but I can’t be apart of your little fantasy..” It was clear it pained his friend to say al this. “We’re not some sort of destined couple or whatever you think we are. It just doesn’t work that way, okay?”

Oh. So, not as he expected.

Right

“Well, why not?” The Robin urged, hurt growing in his blue eyes.

“I’m dating Cass,” breathed Kon. “Look, we were going to tell you tomorrow but then all of this happened...I’m sorry, I should have told you,”

Ouch. Fuck. Again?

“Right,” was all he could mutter. “I’m uh. I’m sorry, Kon,” he had to leave. Had to get out of there fire his eyelids broke like dams and he had to muffle his own screams. “I think I’m going to head out, actually..goodnight, Kon,” Tim sighed. He walked off then, taking deep breaths to help ignore the boy calling his name behind him. He could catch him if he wanted to. Easily. Obviously he didn’t want to. Kon loved Cass...not Tim.

****

“I kissed him,”

“You what?!” The voice over the phone sounded livid.

“Yeah, yeah I know stupid, right?” Tim sighed. He sat on his bed, holding a chilled glass of chardonnay, just as he had promised himself.

“Im guessing it didn’t go so well?”

He could hear her cringe over the phone. Tim didn’t respond. Instead, he simply sipped his drink: dry. This one was eruopean as were most of the others, rolled in oak barrels and some sort of fruit. It was like drinking Kon’s scent. Whatever cheap cologne he decided to douce himself in every morning some how crawled its way into his head to torture him. He set the glass down.

“Im sorry, Tim, you really-”

“Its okay, Steph, really,” insisted Tim, having cut her off.

“Is it?” The girl asked genuinely.

“Yes. I’ve decided I cannot change it, so yes, its fine,”

“Wow. Okay. Thats, that’s actually very mature of you,”

The robin nodded, although obviously not visible.

“Goodnight, Steph,” he called into the phone.

“Goodnight, Tim,” she huffed back, right before leaving him in inconsiderable silence.

The boy picked up the wine glass again. He stared deeply into the few bubbled and cringed with the inhale of smoke and aged French oak.

“You’re really messing with my mind, huh, Conner Kent?”

Tim glanced around. His room was gloomy. sad. Dimmed. He wished for Kon to come light it up a bit, yet he didn’t. They’d be apart for now, but he’d turn around eventually. He would get his fantasy.

[yellowocaballero]

I left a yelly comment because it was like 5am and I haven't gotten the time to process yet (i binge studied for two weeks and your fics are the first non-study shit ive read in a long time and the absurdism and philosophy made me so happy). BUT. About TCF. It rang very true in some ways to me, as someone from a 3rd world country because we... we are constantly under crisis. The apocalypse? It happens all the time. There's never money and sometimes theres LESS or theres a coup or a riot and-

And i'm young but i've already lived through one major national crisis that has WRECKED my fam when i was a baby and I'm now the age my parents were last time and I'm living through an even worse socio-politic-economical crash. And I was talking with my dad about this, who lived through a dictatorship and 4 crisis, about how idk how im going to move out or when and i was like "it just feels like the worlds ending" and he laughed and went "the worlds always ending. we just... keep going" (2/)

It's not a special notion, what he said. But. It made me think. About my country and my people and my family and how everyone has lived through so much helplessness and yet they keep choosing when they lack choice. Like, we can barely control our own natural resources or our land or our presidents without external intervention. Imperialism. But yeah, ppl still... fight so much yknow? And they are aware of it. They keep going. And your fics, specially TCF, reminded me of that. (3/)

IM SORRY IM RANTING SO MUCH BUT LET ME PRAISE YOU! your fic (your story, goddamn!) made me think of that. Of my dad. How the world's always ending but people keep going anyways, how they still try to change at least a little bit just because its the decent thing to do, just because why not? It's not about being an individual hero. It's collectivity and organisation and just... facing the storm togheter. Building a shelter. And I know you're asking questions, not solving them but thank you. Truly.

OK IM DONE I DIDNT MARK IT BUT IM DONE!!!! Just... thank you. I'm not a specifically cynic person (nor a faux positive one) but I just... i'm thankful. I'm touched. Hope you have a really nice day. Truly

Yes!! YES!!!

Thank you so much for these asks, and for sharing. I really enjoy hearing how people’s lives and experiences act as a lens through which they read my stuff, and people always have incredibly interesting perspectives. Thank you for sharing yours - it’s really valuable. 

Something that’s always stood out to me in TMA is the resilience of people. Awful, terrible things keep happening to people, and they just get up, dust themselves off, and keep living anyway. Even when it’s hard or not worth it, almost every TMA character makes the decision to live and try to live well. It’s an essential part of being an Avatar, especially for Jon’s arc - that you choose living painfully over dying peacefully. Jon made the decision to hurt others and live instead of die - that’s important! As ol Jonny Sims said, TMA is about those compromises and choices we have to make, when there is no one good answer. 

I believe very firmly that people are REALLY GOOD at surviving! You’re right - no matter how bad things get, or how terrible the situation seems, life goes on. The worlds ends and we wake up the next day. I think this first started hitting me around COVID, and you can tell how dramatically COVID affected my idea of the apocalypse - an apocalypse where everything’s different, where everybody lives in constant fear and misery in a way so different from the way they once did...but hey, we’re living. People are still memeing, still taking care of their kids, still playing with their dogs. People have survived the worst conditions imaginable in life throughout history (as I’m sure you know), and they still somehow got up and did their work. Even on a personal level - I had a conversation with a friend the other day where I remarked about how many times I’ve felt in my life that I can’t handle something, that I can’t do it, that I can’t make it through the next day or do this task or graduate or get this job or whatever. But I always do. Every time I say ‘I can’t do this’ or ‘I can’t handle this’, I always end up waking up the next day anyway. I’ve survived every day I’ve ever had! And I’ve survived some DAYS! Weird how that works out!

Season 5 in TMA is Hell (It is really basically hell, I have feelings on this). People sinned in one of 14 ways, and they’re being punished for all time because of it. But my approach to the apocalypse (written before I started listening to S5), was that it was just a new world. More dangerous, definitely more terrible, way more fear demons, full of monsters and urban fantasy and everything...but a world, where people live, if not thrive. Nobody’s thriving, in Jon’s world - but people are surviving, because not even Jonah Magnus can take that from them. I kind of dislike in S5 how people are just trapped in a nightmare or a dream, it’s so stagnant and perpetual. It’s very scary, but I wanted to build an urban fantasy type world, and it’s important that those worlds feel livable and exciting. The world in TCF, as Helen said, is simply different. Life always seems to get harder, because men like Jonah Magnus turned it into a capitalist hellscape and exploited it for himself, but far worse has happened and we aren’t dead yet!

And Jon, who is the utterly privileged class, who reaps every benefit of capitalism there is, looks at this oppressed world that he created and decides that he doesn’t want or need it. And then he rips the chains from the world and gives it back to humanity. It doesn’t fix everything - but it gives people a fighting chance. Which is all they need.  

Thanks for the ask, and thanks for sharing your story!

[inkdemonapologist]

Okay but I do actually want to know both the things you love and the things you could rant about from DCTL?

OH BOY UHHHHHH okay lets see, I'm gonna see if I can do the "add a readmore after you post it" thing and see if that'll keep it stable.......

But also, much like Sammy, I am incapable of shutting up unless you strike me in the head with a blunt object, so uh, forgive my wordiness:

THINGS I ENJOY:

- DCTL gave us Sammy's ink addiction and like, if you had asked me before all this "what would you most like to see in a franchise?" I would not have answered "one of the characters drinks ink accidentally and then discovers that he can't stop" but boy that sure is my favourite concept that I LOVE to see handled literally any other way than how the book handled it!!!

- I like what it added to Tom and Allison and Norman!! Like, it's not big twists on their characters or anything -- we already knew Tom felt he was doing the wrong thing, so getting to see his CRUSHING GUILT over creating the machine isn't New Information, but it's nice to see and understand more of him; for all of them I feel a lot more attached to them after getting to see more of them as people.

- Like 90% of the "I LOVE IT" category for me is how the book handled Joey, and Buddy's relationship with Joey. The way Joey isn't a Sinister Mastermind Who’s Just Screwing With Everyone but just manipulative in a more mundane way -- someone who thinks of himself as just the guy with the vision to call the shots; he wants what he wants and this is how he's learned to get it; he exploits people not through devious schemes, but just by offering them something that they want or need and asking too much in return, expecting their loyalty for his favours. And the way he interacts with Buddy, making Buddy complicit with him and keeping Buddy off-balance and insecure while making him a favourite and treating him as Special is just PERFECT --  gives a lot of content to kind of extrapolate off of when pondering what must've drawn the others in and convinced them to ignore the red flags. I was initially frustrated with the idea of Buddy not being an artist and jUST DECIDING TO LEARN TO ANIMATE ON THE SPOT ("I've never done this before but I'm sure I can just do an artist's job" is a weirdly common throwaway thing in media and as an artist iTS A PET PEEVE) but actually the way they use his plagiarism to make him trapped in a lie in ways Joey doesn't even realise ends up being a neat echo of other employees (coughTOMcough), who were involved in much graver sins but suddenly felt they couldn't object or they'd lose their one chance, just like Buddy. There's a lot here that I think is really great.

OKAY THATS THE GOOD STUFF, LET'S COMPLAIN ABOUT SAMMY:

- Uncomfortable Bigotry Vagueness that we all knew was gonna be in this list -- I dunno man, a guy committing a microaggression and getting startled and defensive when he's called out for it doesn't necessarily completely ruin his character I GUESS, but the way this was handled is just SO WEIRD AND VAGUE that it's uncomfortable and it doesn't seem to serve any real purpose. "Is Tom black?" is a question I actually have to ask because the text sort of implies he is while also dancing around it and apparently Word of God said he's not??? which makes Buddy's comment nonsensical???? And I mean, you could go that route, since Buddy wonders to himself if Sammy talks to everyone like this -- HE ACTUALLY DOES!! Even within the text of the novel, he uses "Joey" instead of Mr. Drew, which is consistent with his audiologs in the game -- but that makes the writing suggest "this character THINKS this guy might be racist but actually they're reading too much into it and it wasn't racially motivated at all, he's just a jerk!!" wHICH IS SOMEHOW EVEN MORE ICKY??? Anyway like yeah I guess it's not inconsistent with his character that while Sammy Lawrence may not have any specific grudge against minorities he has probably not checked his privilege or done the work to challenge his own internal biases, but “Your Fav Probably Contributes To Systemic Racism In Ways He Hasn’t Considered, As Do We All When Our Assumptions Go Unchecked” is still a wild thing to wade through in a fun story about demonic cartoons

- but yknow so is T H E   H O L O C A U S T

- Sammy's voice is wrong. I'm actually okay with him being a weird awkward asshole, I already kind of assumed he was and that's part of why I like him!! but there's so many places he doesn't quite... talk like himself? And not just in terms of word choice, like -- so in his monologue at the end, he's described as talking so quickly that his words are "tumbling out faster than he can speak them," which initially seems fine; like yeah, that's a Standard Scene we're familiar with, the person who's been Driven Mad With Insight becoming more and more manic as they try to convey it -- until I tried to imagine it and realised that Sammy doesn't talk like this. That's a really consistent quality I always notice about his voice; whether he's almost giddily excited in prophet mode, or he’s his irritated and overworked human self, or he's violently angry and his voice has that echo effect -- he always speaks very deliberately. He enunciates carefully. There's some circumstances where I'd buy this as showing that he's Not Himself, but I feel like those would kind of need to be in the middle of his transformation, not at the end of it.

- In fact a lot of the scenes with Sammy kind of have this feeling -- that it's not necessarily an exploration of Sammy as a character, but that he is filling a trope or archetype role here. Once he's fully transformed he excitedly describes the process as more of a mental compulsion, which is in contrast to his weird yeerk-infected behaviour when trying to get ink from Miss Lambert. Both of those scenes don't seem wrong on their own because they fit tropes we know -- but they feel weird when you try to fit them together.

- I also just in general am not a fan of the ink acting like a weird yeerk. It can be a parasite I guess but when it starts overwriting and puppeting people and crawling around to enter their body that's just a completely DIFFERENT kind of supernatural story and it’s not what im here for!!!

- THE FREAKIN!!! HE WILL SET US FREE!!!! WHY????????? SAMUEL LAWRENCE WHAT IS HE SETTING YOU FREE FROM??????? Sammy has No Motive for any of what he's doing, other than just Ink Made Me Do It. The whole thing that was INTERESTING about Sammy as a character is the contrast between this frustrated, ornery musician with no specific love for the cartoons he works on, and the manically devoted cultist he becomes. What happened in the middle there? What made him desperate enough to shift his mindset so much? "Something supernatural made him do things that don't benefit him in any way" is a very boring answer to this question!!! Susie was a victim who implies that her transformation has forced her to do things she didn't want to do, but we can still see her motive -- she wanted to be Alice, so she took a sketchy offer to try to get what she wanted. Even now, her violence echoes that goal -- to be a more perfect Alice. What did Sammy want? WHO KNOWS. Even in his ink-addled state at the end, we don't understand what he hopes the Ink Demon will even do for him, and in fact he seems to be responsible for creating the very scenario he's begging Bendy to reverse in the game.

- [sighs loudly into my hands]

- Overall I'm left wondering if the author just..... didn't like Sammy Lawrence? And I don't mean that in the sense of him being a rude jerk -- like, Joey is not a good person, but the author seems to be interested in him and in what makes him tick. There doesn't seem to be that same interest in Sammy. Sammy's role in the story is that of a monster, transformed into something murderous, unable to prevent or choose it. He's not a victim of anyone but the ink, no one had to manipulate him or figure out how his brain worked or what he wanted or what he feared or give him any reason to do the things he does -- ink got in his mouth and overwrote his personality. And we don't even get to see that change, not really. He starts out angry and defensive and continues being angry and defensive up until his very last scene, denying his ink-stealing but not really much else. We see all his prophetic sketches but we never see hints of this in him, we never see him start to act more excited and hopeful, we never see him seek out the demon he desires to please. Why do we never see Sammy struggling between his dismissive angry front and a building religious fervour he can't quite suppress? We don't get to see any of the in-between. There's no interest at all in why or even what it looked like as Sammy became what he became, when, to be honest, I suspect interest in precisely that is one reason he's such a big fav.

- It's funny, in a "cries into my hands" kind of way, when Sammy is just knocked in the head while monologuing and immediately removed from the story without further mention, like...... that sure is the pattern with him, isn't it, he just tries very very hard and never actually gets to matter, but it also fits right in here, too, in this book that doesn't want to think about his motives -- he rambles nonsensically, explaining nothing, gets one trademark phrase, and then is hastily removed so the story doesn't have to think about him anymore.

...................I think that's most of it.

...

Y'all............ I'm not ready for Sent From Above.......... I'm just not.... I'm not emotionally ready...... like..... Sammy has to be in that right..... he’s Susie’s boss and she has that big crush on him..................................... I’m not ready