#its the best PG song

[renard-dartigue]

Hi now i'm curious what is the beef with the rappers

Man this is going to be long so I'll try to keep this simple and entertaining. I hope this comes across as clear cause I'm shook right now.

Here is a glossarie to break thing up:

Prologue (The Spark 🔥)

Round 1.1 (Physical Education 💪🏾)

Interlude part 1 (Roots 🏠)

Round 1.2 (2 Warning Shots 🔫)

Interlude part 2 (Pusha the Seer 👁)

Round 2.1 (Knifes Out 🔪 )

Round 2.2 (The Nuke 💥)

Epilogue (All eyes on him 👀)

My Theory 🤷🏾‍♂️

Highly recommend checking out the tracks yourself while you read along.

Prologue (The Spark)

Let it be known that I am a neutral party and that I don't take sides when it comes to rap beef. I was here for the music and creativity. I am just trying to recount events to the best of my knowledge. Sorry if some details are inaccurate.

Okay so basically, Drake, J Cole, and Kendrick Lamar are the Big 3 of the rap world right now.

A month ago, Future and Metro Boomin (two rapper who supposedly don't fuck with Drake anymore) released a song with Kendrick Lamar called "Like That". In the song Kendrick took a shot at Drake and J Cole, saying there isn't a big 3, its only him on top.

4 weeks ago J Cole dropped a track called "7 Minute Drill" that is dissing Kendrick. However, in a move that is very uncharacteristic of J, he took down the official track and formally apologized to Kendrick. Thus signaling his exit from the rap battle.

ROUND 1.1 (Physical Ed)

Drake on the other hand dropped "Push Ups" 2 weeks ago, a diss track that went after other rappers he doesn't like but mainly Kendrick. In it, he made fun of Kendrick's height and his contracts. He then ends the song with "I was really try'n keep it PG" meaning he has a nuke on Kendrick that people don't know.

Not long later, Drake dropped ANOTHER diss track "Taylor Made Freestyle" with Ai voices of Snoop Dog and fucking 2PAC! Kendrick has stated before that 2pac is one of his idols so this must have been a deep cut. In the song Drake claims Kendrick doesn't write his own music and uses the writers of Taylor Swift. Relating a rapper to pop music is seen as disrespectful.

INTERLUDE PART 1 (Roots)

Before I continue, I want to give a brief run down on how the public perceives these two rappers.

Drake portrays himself as a superstar, he's always on social media flaunting his success and partying with other celebrities, seeing alot of women and living a lavish lifestyle. His music is catchy, something you put on in the club. Most of his fan base praise him for his sick beats and witty lyrics. He's been in the music industry for a while and is no push over.

Kendrick Lamar is a very private person, doesn't expose anything about his personal life unless its on a track. He almost never gets into fights with anyone. He is a family man, stressing the importance of being there for his wife and son and encourages other fathers to do the same. His fan base praise him for his creative lyrics and highlighting the black American condition.

ROUND 1.2 (2 Warning Shots)

2 Day ago, Kendrick Lamar came back with his first official diss track on Drake called "Euphoria". In this song, Kendrick goes in on Drakes fake personality. Drake has always been known around the community as a bit of a poser, he grew up in Canada and was raised by his white mother, a relatively comfortable childhood. He was a star on the popular show Degassi when he was young. garnering him a fan base early in his career. Kendrick doesn't approve of Drake appropriating black American culture and acting like he some tough guy. When in reality he is a Canadian nerd thats disrespectful to 2pac. All throughout the song, Kendrick hits at things that many people have know about Drake, such as his behavior around underage girls. He also called Drake a deadbeat father who isn't in his son's life, even referencing his lost battle to Pusha T. Then Kendrick finally warns him that he has more dirt that he is willing to share if Drake takes things further.

Similar to Drake, Kendrick dropped another track called "6:16 in LA" later that day. This song focuses on Drake's environment, specifically the people he hangs with. Kendrick implies that Drake paid people to dig into his background and when they didn't find anything, Drake made up stuff instead. Kendrick then says that someone in Drakes group is leaking information to him about something even more serious. Also planting a seed in Drake's mind that his supposed friends don't actually like him, just like the clout from hanging around him.

INTERLUDE PART 2 (Pusha the Seer)

Taking a quick break again, we need to discuss something that occurred long before Drake's battle with Kendrick.

5 years ago, Drake was in a rap battle with rapper Pusha T, someone who was smaller than Drake at the time in terms of popularity. Pusha dropped a song called "The Story of Adidon" where he dropped a bomb that Drake had a kid and wasn't taking care of him. Drake initially denied it but it was later revealed to be true.

Since then Drake has never responded to Pusha T's diss track, making Pusha the current winner. And Kendrick is bringing it back into the light.

Round 2.1 (Knifes Out)

Around 2 am EST time of May 4th, Drake drops his diss track, "Family Matters" one of his strongest songs, switching his flow 3 times in the span of 7 minutes. In true Drake fashion, its a club song with a catchy beat. Like his previous diss, its aimed at multiple people but the main focus is on Kendrick, even bring up "I was really try'n keep this PG".

Drake doubles down on his black identity and mocks the fact that Kendrick and other rappers are saying he isn't black, (incorrectly assuming that they are coming at him for being mixed when the real issue is that he is appropriating black American rap culture as a Canadian mixed man who grew up in a safe environment) Drake not only calls Kendrick a fraud who only raps about black issues for attention, Or that his activism is performative. He makes a shocking claims that Kendrick is a wife beater. Then Drake says that Kendrick's son doesn't belong to him and implies Kendrick's producer was the real father.

The track caused an uproar. But only for the span of 15 minutes. Because Kendrick did the unthinkable.

ROUND 2.2 (THE NUKE)

Almost as if expecting Drake's move, Kendrick Lamar did what no one saw coming. He dropped his diss track "Meet The Grahams" about 15 minutes after Drake released "Family Matters".

This time around, in a fashion almost unheard of from him, Kendrick strips all the usual metaphors from his lyricism and structures his track like he is speaking to Drake and his family, 4 parts per individual.

Kendrick begins by speaking to Drakes Son, Adonis, the same son Pusha T exposed Drake for neglecting 5 years ago. He's apologizing to him for his father's behavior. Kendrick speaks to him softly but sternly like a mentor, telling him not to be like his father. Kendrick tells Adonis all the things Drake did and warns him not to do them too: involved with escorts, plastic surgery to appear more black, surgery to look more muscular, hiding a kid. (Kendrick stresses that Adonis is black regardless of being mixed, further highlighting that he isn't discrediting Drake's blackness because he's mixed but because he isn't being himself.) Finishing of by telling the kid to be proud of who he is.

The second half is Kendrick addressing Drake's mother and father, Sandra and Denise. Kendrick speaks to her like he's revealing tragic news, explaining to her that her son is involved in disgusting things. He goes down a list of things, his tone growing more intense and angry. Kendrick then claimed that Drake is employing and enabling pedos in his group, and hopes they die. Even implying that his group is going to be raided by the feds some day.

The third half is the MOST shocking of all. Kendrick begins talking to an unnamed individual, simply calls her babygirl. Similar to Adonis, Kendrick takes on a somber tone and apologizes to her for Drakes behavior. He says its not her fault Drake abandoned her, says that she is deserving of love. He warns her not to become a target for people like Drake to pray on and says she has so much to offer the world.

Kendrick revealed Drake has ANOTHER kid and isn't in their life! (Allegedly)

To close of, the fourth half is Kendrick speaking directly to Drake, his tone tired. He tries to reiterate that he doesn't have hate for him. However, Kendrick says Drake was the first one to go after his family and he couldn't let it slide. He once again calls for Drake to take the mask off. Then says this isn't a rap battle anymore, tells Drake he is fighting himself.

Epilogue (All eyes on him)

And so here we are, waiting for what will happen next.

Drake posted an Instagram story denying the claim he has another kid. But given what happened with Pusha T, we can't quite take his word for it yet. We should wait a bit to see if anything comes out.

Kendrick hasn't put out a statement on Drake's claims about him but given the recurring theme of Drake being a manipulative lier, Kendrick clearly denies it. Given how private he is, its difficult to prove or disprove it. Much like Drake's claims, we will have to wait and see if any evidence comes out about it.

Drake and Kendrick stans are at eachothers throats right now, arguing over who one and whats real or fake.

Right now everyone is looking to see if Drake is going to continue the battle or stay silent like he did with Pusha.

My Theory

Personally as an outside observer who only followed the beef for good music. I think this goes beyond a simple rap battle.

Here is my theory: Someone from Drake's clique told Kendrick that Drake and his producers were writing something about him. Real or fake, Kendrick was pissed. And so he drafted 3 tracks, dumping everything he hates about Drake into them. And then, with the leaker's help, Kendrick baited Drake into a battle, goading Drake to drop the "Family Matters" track so he can shut the battle down with "Meet the Grahams". Or maybe his first 2 tracks were a warning to Drake that if he released a track with lies on him he would reveal he has another kid.

I do think Kendrick initially had good intentions in trying to help Drake be a better person. But maybe the more he learned about Drake the less sympathetic he felt.

But I don't know thats just how I see it.

Thanks for reading my essay. I hope it made sense heh. I encourage healthy discussions in the comments and reblogs please. But everyone agrees that Drake is inappropriate with young girls. We won't argue over that.

[justbelievinginmagic]

˗ˏˋ do you even lift, bro??ˎˊ˗ : CHANGBIN X READER

pairing: changbin x plus-size fem!reader

summary: changbin loves showing off for you.

warnings/tags: pg-13, insecurities surrounding weight, exercising, so many pet names, fluff fluff fluff! this is so self-indulgent. the fact changbin can lift 280 lbs haunts me in the best way.

wordcount: 1.5k words

You always liked to watch your boyfriend work out in his personal home gym. Sometimes you’d join him in exercising (he loves the idea of being a gym couple despite your gentle disagreement) but most times you’d lounge across the couch (that he had put into the space just for you, of course) and work on something on your laptop. Time with Changbin was always limited – between tours, practices, recording sessions, producing sessions, and, of course, company work – any free time shared was bonding time. And Changbin loved spending time with you no matter the activity.

Working out wasn’t your favorite activity – at least not how Changbin approached it. As an idol, he was quite regimented when it came to… anything. He saw it as an accomplishment. Why just make the usual count of reps when its Better if he did more? He went harder and harder each session. His workout routine was intense and not something you couldn’t just hop into without huffing and puffing. Working out wasn’t your favorite activity but watching Changbin work out was.

The sounds: Soft huffs, gentle grunts, and low whines. The whispers of his reps under his breath. The clink-clank of the machines’ parts. The clunk of the weights hitting the ground heavily. His workout playlist going between loud rap to uppity girly pop to even slow R&B (sometimes songs you swear you heard in tender moments between you two.)

The sights: His face screwed up into a grimace shouldn’t look so handsome – bared teeth with his eyes shut. His nose scrunched as he lifts weights high above him. The gleam of sweat making his skin look golden and glowy. His hair damp across his forehead. His white compression shirt getting more and more see-through as he continues his workout (and the inevitable shiver that goes through you when he sheds the shirt with a groan.)

It never gets old.

This was another such day. You had tried a simple work-out. Some cardio and some light weight training (at the insistence of Changbin.) You’ve had many conversations about exercising (it’s his favorite hobby and its your hardest frenemy as a plus size woman after all, and there were multiple conversations about the importance of strength training with weights – “you won’t bulk, baby! I promise. No, you won’t—who told you you would get a footballer’s shoulders? No, no, baby! Here--” and then he taught you workouts that would be good for you courtesy of his trainer). And while you were done in 30 minutes, you knew Changbin had at least another 30 minutes on his calendar set aside for ‘working out with yeobo’ as it was marked in his schedule.

So here you sat on the couch, gazing over at Changbin only to avert your gaze when his dark eyes eventually flickered over to you. It was a fun game. Looking over again when you feel his gentle gaze leave you, your eyes lick over his form. He was weight-training. A completely different routine to your light weight lifting to tone your arms and back. He was lifting heavy weights. Some were being swung up to his head before he squatted and lowered the weight in between his legs. Another was a normal curling of weights to show off his biceps and triceps. And now… oh it was your favorite – the dead lift.

The idea that your boyfriend could hold such a high amount of weight was attractive. And you’ve told him many times. Still, almost like a child on Christmas seeing the gifts around the tree in the morning, you perch up on the leathered couch to gaze over at your Changbin. When he glanced your way as he added another round heavy-looking weight, he laughed as he caught your gaze finally.

“Caught ya, yeobo,” he teased smiling that grin that made your heart tremble with a flurry of butterflies. “I win our game today.”

You laughed. “I wasn’t trying to win – I just want to look at my handsome man.”

He pursed his lips into an air-kiss (that you dramatically grab the air for) as he moved to place another weight on the bar.

“How much is that?” you queried.

Looking over the weights, he replied, “Around 180 pounds.”

Almost as if to tease you, his arms raised high above his head as he peeled the skin-tight shirt from his form. His muscles bounced as they settled into place after tossing the shirt aside. Changbin glanced over at you with bashful eyes. Your reaction made him laugh, overly dramatically flinging yourself back on the couch in a overwhelmed mess. "Stop," you whined, peering at him from your spot. He moved to lift the weight he prepared, arms flexing deliciously.

You looked him up and down before catcalling proudly. “You’re so hot.”

He smirked as he continued to lift the weights.

You couldn’t help but let the number he told you echo in your mind. You were heavier than that. You watched him as he lifted the weights again and again. Was it hard for him? You watched his breath – his chest rising and falling as he pursed his lips as he took in a big thing of air.

“I’m surprised you can hold me up,” you commented offhandedly-more absentmindedly as you continued to ogle your boyfriend. Of course, he has – your moments in bed don’t always stay limited to the bed – but now you were thinking… has he ever lifted you up fully? Sure, he’s lifted your leg up or held your legs or held you against the wall. You couldn’t remember if he’s ever held you like a bride or even slung over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes.

His breath that he was holding as he lifted was audible as he dropped the weights unceremoniously.

“What?” he spluttered – as if you had insulted him personally.

You raised your eyebrows in surprise. Eyes widening as you laugh a bit, if not a bit self-deprecatingly.

“Baby, I’m not tiny. I know I’m big and I’m—you know I don’t expect you to lift me or hold my weight. I’m too heavy for everyone.” You snorted a bit. “The times you have is enough.”

“C’mon over here, jagiya,” he called, hands reaching out to you.

“Binnie,” you tried as you looked at him. “Don’t do this.”

The worst feeling in the world is when someone says no, they can handle you – only to can’t. Throughout your life, you’ve experienced this – moments where you’ve sat on the laps of others only to hear an ‘oof’ while smaller friends never experienced such a reaction. You can see it now – your sweet boyfriend trying to lift you up for longer than a moment only to huff and lower you to your feet.

“Bunny,” he hummed as he came over to the couch. “Do you think my muscles are for show?” he tilted his head a bit as if challenging you.

You gave him a bit of a dead-eyed look. “Binnie- really I’ve go –“ You didn’t get to finish your words as he bent down to scoop an arm under your legs, letting his other arm support your back. A soft gasp left you as he stood back up, your arms scrambling to wrap around his neck. Trying to hoist your weight up, but he refused, pulling you closer to his chest in rebellion.

“Shh,” he hushed as he walked over to the large mirrors beside his weights.

“Never say I can’t hold you,” he murmured softly as he held you close to his chest. There wasn’t an inkling of struggle or huff in his voice. He was just holding you. Something you imagined before countlessly but with burning heart of self-consciousness never thought could happen. Yet here he was.

“In fact,” he hummed as he walked over to the nearby weight rack, with you in his arms still. “You are as light as a feather.” He squatted once, twice. His arms didn’t tremble. His breath didn’t hitch. If you were attracted when watching him work out, in this instance, you could faint with how much adoration radiated from your heart. Adoration and anticipation.

He glanced down at you, lips curling into a soft grin at the look in your eyes. Leaning in, he pressed a kiss to your cheek, pursing his lips over and over with a smooching sound. As much as he’d love to swing you around to hold you by your bum (with your legs wrapping around his lean waist), he wasn’t done proving a point.

The nearby weight rack was lower than his waist and, so carefully, he squatted down.

“Can you hold one of those weights, yeobo?” he pointed with his chin to the sets of weights resting on the rack. 20lb, 40 lb, 50lb, more. “Whichever you can hold, darling.”

You reach over to grab the one of your choice before resting it on the curve of your hips. As he stood again, he swung you about, doing curls with your form.

“Yeah, still light as a feather,” he hummed. Changbin’s ears burned with pride as he heard your soft girlish giggle. He let out his own giggle which only made you blush, arms going to pull you towards his neck. He leaned his head forward, following your blushing bashful hiding towards his neck. “You hear me? I’m not even breaking a sweat, yeobo.” He pressed another kiss to the curve of your cheek.

Your eyes flicker to meet his tender ones.

“Never ever say I can’t lift you or that you are too big for me,” he murmured gently. “You are perfect. My angel.” He swayed you a bit like a baby. “Light as a feather, angel.”

[arlh0e]

Moving on in time

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Hozier x gn! Reader, angst, post-break up, youre in his band, touring with Hozier, public embarassment, emotions on high, mutual frustration, miscommunication, tension you could cut with a knife

Summary: Its been months since the break up, you had been with andrew for years, but with the touring and your busy schedules, you decided it was best for the two of you to go your seperate ways. At the time, you hadn’t thought about the fact that when he decided it was time to record and release a new album, you would be back on tour with him, helping him perform music that he had written about your break up.

You had been avoiding andrew like the plague offstage for months. You were well into the unreal unearth tour, and though you enjoyed his music, and you loved playing with him and the band, you really hadn’t realized how emotionally taxing this would be.

Playing bass in the band meant you stood up toward the front of the stage next to him. And you had made a point to pretend that everything was fine and cool while you were performing, but truth be told, there was no possible way that the two of you could ever have anything even resembling a friendship ever again.

It broke your heart all over again if you were being honest. You hated not speaking to him, but you hated having to act like you were still best friends even more.

Tonights show was particularly hard on you. You were all sleep deprived, and Andrew had gotten particularly frustrated during sound check, so even though the show had been running smoothly, tensions were on high and you were doing everything in your power not to show it.

You were doing your best to calm down, but listening to music he had written about how angry he was with you and how your whole relationship was nothing but toxic (First Time was by far your least favorite, it painted a completely inaccurate portrayal of how you treated him.) it wasn’t exactly what you’d call an easy feat.

The biggest problem came during Francesca. He always glanced over to you periodically, it was something that he did to everyone, to make sure everyone was doing okay, but for whatever reason, during francesca, he took it upon himself to all but stare you down for the majority of the song.

It was subtle at first, barely noticeable, just sideways glances, but by the time the second chorus came around, he was turned in your direction staring at you as he sang.

Jesus fucking christ.

This man really had the audacity to spend hours shit talking on you and then sing the only kind words he had to say directly to you.

Whatever happened to keeping his private life a secret? Whatever happened to “there’s no muse”?

He was staring a hole into you, all but calling you out publicly in front of an audience of god knows how many people. You had known he wasn’t perfect, everyone was capable of mistakes, but this isn’t something you’d ever expect from him.

This was cruel.

And the worst part about it? He actually looked genuine. He was looking at you, pleading, all but begging silently. Of course, you knew it was all an act, likely something he had planned to grab the attention of his fans and get people talking, but it still hurt.

You knew that you were still in love with him, and realistically, you had thought until the album release, that he had felt the same, and as much as you hated the idea, you had thought that reconciliation might be possible.

Seeing him look at you like that, like he was still in love with you, like he actually meant a word of what he was saying made you want to cry. You were stunned.

You honestly half decided then and there that you would quit at the earliest opportunity. You loved touring with him and you loved music being your full time job, but this was too much. He couldn’t do this to you.

You held eye contact with him, willing yourself not to be the first to look away, refusing to let him win.

You did your best to stabilize the lump in your throat as you stepped toward the mic, still looking at him as you sang his lyrics with him.

“Heaven is not fit to house a love like you and I.”

It was a phrase he used to say to you, something he had told you toward the beginning of your relationship, when you were still in the process of healing from the religious bull shit your parents had instilled into you, and you went through a short lived patch of worrying that if there was a hell, you’d be going there because you had slept with Andrew so soon.

He had comforted you by telling you that if there were a heaven, the walls weren’t strong enough to hold two people who were so in love with one another and that you’d both be sent to hell for loving more absolutely and unconditionally than god himself.

It was a sweet sentiment, and something he knew only you would get, nevertheless fan went crazy over the lyrics that were meant to comfort you but that he had twisted into something that only brought you pain now.

You knew what he was doing when he wrote it and that was what felt the worst. He had turned what you had once considered your greatest comfort and the most heart wrenchingly beautiful thing anyone had ever said to you into your single least favorite sentence in the entire english language.

As the song came to a close, you maintained eye contact with him for a concerning amount of time, as the crowd erupted into applause.

Finally, he turned away from you, looking back to the audience and thanking them for coming before ushering the band forward for a bow.

You walked forward, took Andrews hand briefly and bowed, staying there just long enough for the lights to come down and then you all but ran backstage.

The tears were flowing freely by that point, not wanting anyone to see you, you rushed to the nearest bathroom, locked the door and cried.

You knew he wasn’t fond of you anymore, but this was a new kind of distaste. Cruelty like that bordered on hatred, a sentiment which, until now you didn’t think he was even capable of. If you had known that this was what would come of the decision to break up, you wouldn’t have done it. Hell, if you had known, you would’ve opted to just stay friends.

You debated how you would go about quitting. After that stunt, you knew that this was no longer good for you, regardless of how much you loved touring and regardless of how much you loved him. You needed to leave and to never speak to him again. Distance was the only way you’d ever get over him.

Once you had calmed yourself down, you opened the door, and headed down the hallway to Andrew’s dressing room and knocked on the door. After a few deep breaths, you were ready to face him.

The door opened just a crack, before opening fully. “Ehm… Hey?” He looked genuinely confused. Sounded it too, though his whole body did visibly relax when he saw it was you.

“Hey.” You took one more deep breath before continuing. “I just wanted to let you know, I think it’s time to find a new bassist. I will not be touring you any longer after the break in December.” Your voice broke a little bit toward the end. You were angry with yourself for showing how upset you were. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that he had gotten a reaction out of you.

His face fell. “What? Why? If it’s about us not talking, I swear I’m not ignoring you, I just-” you cut him off mid-sentence.

“No. Andrew it’s about everything.” You sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose in frustration. “I can handle standing next to you while you play music about how much you hate me for breaking up with you. Thats fair. It’s deserved even. But what I can’t stand is that. What you just did on that stage was nothing short of cruel.”

He let out a sigh, looking down at his feet. “I didn’t-” he cut himself off, running his hands over his face. “I didn’t meanwhile it like that I just-“

“Then how did you mean it Andrew? Because what it looked like to me was you talking shit to thousands of people and then acting like you still want me because you knew it was going to hurt.” I was all but yelling at him by now. I was positive that a few stage hands were overhearing this, but I didn’t even care. For all I cared, the whole world could know about how awful he was being.

“Can you please just come in? Can we talk about it? Please?” He looked completely genuine. I couldn’t tell if he was just stressed about losing an original member of the band, or if he actually cared that he had hurt me, either way, he wasn’t going to change my mind.

“Fine. 10 minutes, but don’t expect to change anything. Im quitting. You’re not changing that.” I said sternly, moving past him to sit on the small couch in the corner of the room. With a sigh, he closed the door, and let out a sigh.

“You wanted to talk. So talk.” I cross my legs on the couch, looking down at my hands, refusing to look at him.

“Look, I’ve been wanting to explain the album to you for a while.” He walked across the small room, placing himself on the opposite side of the couch from you. “When we broke up, I was hurt and I was angry, and I channeled that into my writing.

That doesn’t excuse any of it, and you’re well within your rights to be upset with me, thats more than fair.” He let out a sigh, looking at his hands, you could tell he was shaking. You wondered if this was as stressful for him as it was for you. If he was upset, you knew it wasn’t for the right reasons of course.

“I just don’t want you to think that I don’t still care about you. I was devastated, hell, I still am but I don’t want you thinking I hate you or something. I wasn’t doing anything to hurt you, I use my writing as an outlet and I needed a way to turn this into something I was proud of.”

I looked up to meet his eyes. They held nothing but truth. It was one of the great things about knowing him so well, I could read him like a book. If he was lying to save his own ass, I’d know.

“And I already said that I understand that.” You took a few breaths, trying to calm yourself and failing miserably. Your tears broke free and you sniffled as you wiped your face. “What I don’t understand is why you took something you used to say to me for my comfort, threw it into a song about me and then stared me down onstage while you sang those words and looked at me like you’re still in love with me, knowing damn well that I’m not over you.” The words left my mouth before I could even process what was happening.

My hand shot up to my mouth. Way to go. Just show the man all your cards. Throw away any advantage you had in the conversation. Great job.

His eyes lit up a bit. For the first time in months, it looked like he had hope. It pulled at your heart a bit, seeing him react that way even though you knew it wasn’t out of any remaining love he held for you. He was just glad you didn’t hate him probably.

“Okay, A.) I didn’t know that, and had I known, we would’ve had this conversation way earlier and B.) I wrote Francesca as a last ditch effort to get you back. I put that in there because it’s the truth.” He sighed again, this time a bit more hopeful, but still frustrated and sad. “I wasn’t planning on singing it to you. It just kind of happened. I didn’t think, I am sorry for that. And Im even more sorry for not explaining myself earlier.” His hand moves to his hair, running his fingers through his curls. It was something he did when he was thinking really hard about something.

“I get that.” You sighed in response. “I still think it’s best that I leave though. As far as I can tell, it’s better for both of us if we just cut contact.” You were still crying, bordering on sobbing. You pull your knees into your chest and curl your arms around yourself. It was a hard enough decision to make, but putting the thought into action was so much harder.

“Please don’t say that.” He sat up, moving slightly closer to you, he was pleading with his eyes, he looked desperate. You could even see the beginnings of a few tears filling his eyes. “Look, I know I’ve said a lot of shit that really hurt you, I can’t take that back, but please at least give me the chance to try and fix it.” The first of his tears spilled over and his voice cracked.

“Andrew, before all of this, I would have said yes, hell I would have even said we could try being together again, but at this point, I don’t know if I’ll ever go a day without questioning if you actually care about me. Thats not something that can be fixed.” I pull away from him, turning and putting my feet on the ground.

“Baby, please just let me try. And if you still want to leave by December, then I won’t stop you, but I’ve been dying seeing you every day and not talking to you.” He moves next to me and takes one of my hands in both of his. “Please. Just can we try?”

You sigh, looking down at your hand in his. He was so warm, his touch just as inviting as you remembered, he was close enough that you could smell him, he still wore the same cologne you had picked out for him years ago. It was woodsy and sort of musky, and the way it mixed with his natural scent drove you absolutely nuts.

With another sigh, you lean your head onto his shoulder. “I kinda hate you a little bit.” You huff, frustrated. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t wan’t to work things out between the two of you. You wanted nothing more than to take everything back and go back to being together.

He chuckled a little bit, leaning his head to rest against the top of yours. “Thats okay.” You can feel him smile against your hair, placing a kiss on the top of your forehead. “I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

You move yourself closer to him, pulling your legs into his lap. “I really do miss you.” Your voice is muffled by his chest. “As stupid as it sounds I’ve thought about just coming back probably a million times.”

His hand is in your hair, moving across your scalp, soothingly. It was nice. “It’s not stupid. I’ve come so close to cornering and begging you to take me back on a handful of occasions.”

You laugh a little bit. “Just don’t write any more mean songs about me okay?” You look up at him, meeting his eyes for the first time since the start of this conversation.

He leans down and places his lips against yours for a fleeting second. “I promise, love.”

I tell you what, when an Idea strikes, I be writing so fast, I did that in like 3 hours.

[rayghosts]

its been months since i watched puss in boots: the last wish, and i havent stopped thinking about how good it is. specifically, how it used its own genre as a plot device

when you go in to watch an animated family film, you think, surely no character will die in this. or if they do die, theyll probably fall off a cliff and land offscreen or something. no one actually brutally dies in a cartoon. theyre not even allowed to show blood! but then puss DOES bleed. and just as that scene is the turning point that makes him realize that hes not invincible, it makes the audience realize that this movie can get dark

but its not like the entire movie is grimdark after that. its still a family film! silly stuff still happens! its just that every so often in the middle of all the silliness, the wolf appears, and both we and puss are violently reminded that he very much can die die. this doesnt affect any of the other characters' goals, because why would the prospect of puss's death affect them? but for puss, who thought he was immortal, it's enough to send him into a fucking panic attack. it's a perfect illustration of how concepts like death are always lurking in the background

and i havent even started talking about THE SONG!! when i first saw this movie and heard puss singing fearless hero in the beginning, i thought, "oh, this is a musical!" but its NOT. no other song is sung by the characters throughout the film, but the same song is sung over and over, and it fits because puss is trying desperately to hold on to his past glory as a "fearless hero." and the lyrics: "Who's the gato who rolls the dice? / And gambles with his life?! / Who's never been touched by a blade? / Puss in Boots is never afraid!" hearing them the first time, they sound like normal lyrics youd hear in a song about how heroic a character is, but then it turns out to be clever foreshadowing because these traits (gambling with one's life, pretending youre never afraid, etc) are the very traits that puss had to let go of in the end to finally be able to confront death. i could go on and on about how amazingly this song was used in the movie, but the point is that they never would have been able to pull it off if this werent a family movie where characters bursting into song is seen as normal

seriously, this movie is SO cleverly done. even the fact of it being a 10-year-late sequel adds to the whole idea of puss being a past legend at the start. like, the concept of someone trying to evade death has been done many times already in other forms of media, but the way that puss in boots 2 executed it could ONLY have been done as an animated PG shrek spinoff

its SO SO GOOD and i hope to god it wins the oscar for best animated film

[proxima-writes]

✧*̥˚ my muses, acquired like bruises *̥˚✧

a collection of my fics inspired by taylor swift songs/lyrics, in honor of the release of THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT

JOEL MILLER

cruel summer | au | explicit | chapters: 6/6

Joel takes a contracting job renovating a master bedroom and bathroom while the homeowners are away for the summer on a cruise. He wasn’t expecting their twenty-three year old daughter and the thoughts he’d have about her.

↳AO3 | Tumblr: chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4 | chapter 5 | chapter 6

crimson red paint on my lips | post-outbreak | explicit | connected work

Joel Miller is an asshole. You should have known better than to show up at his door with your lips painted red. Connected to me and the devil and marked me like a bloodstain

↳AO3 | Tumblr

marked me like a bloodstain | post-outbreak | explicit | connected work

You save Joel’s life when the two of you are attacked on a smuggling run. He has an interesting way of saying thank you. Connected to crimson red paint on my lips and me and the devil

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karma is my boyfriend’s dad | au | explicit | connected work

Your boyfriend, Sean Miller, is an asshole. The one redeeming thing about him? His dad, Joel Miller. And he's just invited you along on the family vacation to Panama City Beach, Florida.

↳Tumblr

in a feud with her neighbor | au | explicit | connected work

Five times you think Joel Miller is the worst neighbor ever, and the one time he isn’t.

↳Tumblr

bonus scenes: in a feud with her neighbor | au | PG-13 | connected work

Fluffy bonus scenes for "in a feud with her neighbor" as suggested by anon!

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toyin’ with them older guys | au | explicit | one-shot

Joel Miller is the grumpy bartender and owner of your favorite bar near campus, where you attend trivia every Tuesday night. Thinking there’s no way Joel could return your feelings, your friend suggests trying out Tinder. But when you bring them to the bar for a date, they keep leaving mid date with no explanation. Maybe there’s something Joel isn’t telling you after all.

↳AO3 | Tumblr

help me hold onto you | post-outbreak | explicit | one-shot

Joel always tries his best to keep his mind from wandering to its darkest corners, but occasionally, the frayed threads holding him together with sloppy stitches start to unravel. Sometimes you need to give him something to hold onto.

↳AO3 | Tumblr

seven | post-outbreak | explicit | one-shot

Joel Miller has spent twenty years pushing the grief and guilt surrounding the death of his daughter, Sarah, to the darkest recesses of his brain in favor of survival. Living a more quiet life in Jackson means the ghosts of his past have returned to haunt him. He finds his solace in you, the town librarian.

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the last great american dynasty | au | explicit | one-shot

Joel Miller has loved the historic Victorian home in his neighborhood since the first time he laid eyes on it. When the elderly owner passes, he thinks he might get his chance to finally buy it and fix it up. He doesn’t expect to find you, the granddaughter of the previous owner and trustee of her estate, standing in the way of his dream.

↳Tumblr | AO3

TOMMY MILLER

wrong place, right time | pre-outbreak | explicit | one-shot

What if Joel didn’t answer Tommy’s call from jail? And what if the waitress he’d been defending that night bailed him out instead?

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JAVIER PEÑA

i can see you (javier peña's version) | au | explicit | one-shot

When Javier Peña takes credit for your lead, you take revenge. Good thing you know Javier can't resist a girl in red lipstick.

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FRANKIE MORALES

my tears and my beers and my candles | au | explicit | one-shot

It’s been a bad week and you just need to have a good cry. You didn’t expect Frankie Morales, best friend and unrequited crush, to crash your pity party. He’s got some interesting ways of making you feel better. Maybe it’s not so unrequited after all.

↳AO3 | Tumblr

invisible string | au | explicit | one-shot

After fifteen years, the invisible string that ties you to Frankie Morales pulls you back together

↳Tumblr

MIGUEL O'HARA

i can see you (miguel o'hara's version) | au | explicit | one-shot

As Dr. Miguel O’Hara’s graduate teaching and research assistant, you’ve spent years pushing down the inappropriate thoughts you’ve had about the brilliant, gorgeous man. But what happens when a late night at the lab and a scientific breakthrough leads to a breakthrough of a different kind?

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EDDIE MUNSON

the mark you saw on my collarbone | vampire au | explicit | connected work

A snippet of life with your human and your monster. A oneshot in the bat out of hell series

↳AO3

[kmgkmg]

LOVE FOOL - CHOI SEUNGCHEOL

word count: 0.6k…

pairing: seungcheol x gn!reader

synopsis: you and your boyfriend are out and about being affectionate and just obnoxiously cute!

genre/s: fluff, non-idol!au, bf!seungcheol, established relationship, domestic

warnings: none!

rating: pg

a/n: title is taken from the song love fool by exo! the fic is largely based on this pic hehe <3 first seungcheol fic so hope yall enjoy it!

“Doesn’t that sculpture look like a bunch of grapes?” Seungcheol asks you, pointing to the abstract sculpture in the near distance. 

“It does!” You agree excitedly at his discovery, to which your boyfriend lights up.

He lets his eyes wander on the sculpture for a while more before continuing to walk. The two of you were out for another one of your sweet dates, walking around the city after watching a movie at the theaters. 

Still standing in front of the sculpture, you call out to him, “Let me take some pics of you in front of it.”

He turns back, seeing you motion him over with your hands. “In front of this?” 

“Yeah! It has its own artistic aesthetic, no? Perfect for Instagram.” You explain whilst enthusiastically pulling your phone out in preparation. There were several passersby, but you continued to be unaffected by their stares, solely focused on your boyfriend.  

Seungcheol sees how much you want to take his pictures and lightly jogs back over to you. He’s used to your antics, well aware of how much you enjoyed taking pictures to remember the events of the day.

“There it is, Cheol! Your perfect smile.” 

He notices that you’re grinning from ear to ear. Seungcheol always thought your smile was infectious, but today proved it once again. Unable to contain his own joy, his smile only grows wider at your happiness. He poses with great focus, starting to care less and less about the people around you. 

“Now silly poses!” You direct him, acting playful behind your phone’s camera. He covers his mouth slightly with his hand, trying his best to stifle his laughter. 

An elderly couple approaches you, undetected by you since you were determined to take the best photos of Seungcheol. Seungcheol’s smile falters slightly at the strangers walking to you, stopping his poses. 

“Young love,” the elderly man starts, “this is the best time. Let us take pictures of the two of you together! You resemble my partner and I when we first started dating.” 

You finally look away from Seungcheol, diverting your attention to the source of the words just spoken. An elderly man stood behind you, waiting for your reply to his offer with a small smile and a hint of nostalgia behind it. The couple were still linking arms, clearly in love with each other. Your gaze drifted to their hands, noticed the wrinkled state of them, but both were wearing well-kept rings around their ring fingers. 

“Aw, we would love that!” You answer warmly, carefully passing your phone to him. 

Having not been able to hear your conversation, Seungcheol is frozen in front of the sculpture. You head in his direction, an action that only confuses him more. The puzzlement on his face makes you smirk, before filling him in. Seungcheol nods, moving over so that both of you are centered in the photo. 

He glances over to you beside him, still beaming with a peace sign placed near your face. On the count of three, Seungcheol turns and places a quick peck on your cheek. He loved giving you wet kisses, so he ended the kiss with a loud smooch. Your head whips in his direction, putting your hand up to your face to feel the wetness he left. 

Faking disgust, you rub his spit off your face. “Gross!” 

“What can I say? You make me a fool, Y/N.” Seungcheol shrugs, looking back towards your phone. 

Without missing a beat, you reply to him. “A fool? Then, call me a love fool since I’m completely in love with you.” 

You look at each other adoringly, happy to have met.

“Say cheese!” The elderly man’s spouse instructs, making you both tense up, realizing how distracted you were. 

Seungcheol mumbles through his smile, “That makes two love fools.”

[jackmanbj]

is that ight?

an: hi guys! im back hopefully for long and just wanna say that this is something that didnt take me long to write because i wanted it to be kinda short for my little return!🤭

summary: jack is ranting to you about his problems and your trying your best to help him not wanting him to give up on anything.

jack had just got home from the studio, his eyes were baggy and his hair was messy.

you were sitting on the sofa waiting for jack, even though it was two in the morning.

“jack hun you look tired…”

“just a little, lets go to bed” jack didnt wait for a response and he started walking upstairs and heading to the bedroom while you followed behind

at first, jack didnt even bother taking off his clothes, being to tired to even more after he sat on the bed “jack hun.. i know you’re tired but you need to undress” you say taking off his jacket

jack groans but eventually start undressing, he keeps on his wife-beater and boxers on and lays down

you pull him on top of you, his head resting on your chest as you scratch his scalp lightly

—

the next morning when you woke up, jack was already getting ready to go to the studio

“jack.. your overworked, stay home”

“i cant—im on a high right now! my new song just got higher then first class, everyone’s still expecting me to make new music and i cant take any days off, not right now at least maybe in a few weeks”

“jack you need a break..” “well i want to be able to spoil you and i cant do that if i keep taking breaks” “keep taking breaks? baby.. this would be your first break in four weeks.. sit down” you say patting the bed as you sit up

“why do you feel like that?”

no airports and no flights thats how i wanna live my life, is that ight?

“i—i dont even know.. i just feel like i need to work or everything i have is gonna come crashing down.. like everything i worked for is gonna fall apart, i dont even care about all the cars, and the jewelry.. but i want just a little but even with just a little i feel like im wasting so much”

no sport cars and no ice, okay maybe a little ice, we all got a lil’ vice

“jack hun.. you can want everything in the world and you can get it if you can afford it—wanting something and getting it doesn’t mean that your overdoing it, you see people with seven cars but they can get them because they like them, not because they want to have fame for it”

“but i feel like sometimes its to much, and theres even more to it.. sometimes i hate when fans come up to me and want a whole lot of pictures, i dont mind saying hi or asking for one picture but they keep going and i also feel like me and some of the pg are falling out because of me working so much we dont talk alot…”

no selfies just say hi, im so healthy and alive 4L we them same guys equity for my dogs only time you see gang signs.

“jack not wanting people to come up to you a lot is normal it doesn’t make you a bad person and it shouldn’t make you feel bad, not everyone likes that.. and people lose friends, but if its pg dont you think you should schedule a meet up for all of you, or most of you to hang out and catch up?”

jack shifts his body, not facing you anymore “i want to, i do i wanna hang out with them and i want to stay strong with them but also i dont want to stop my working and my music for it”

im looking to change lives i already changed mine

you take his face in your hands making him face you again “jack people have to move on with there lives sometimes.. everyone cant just wait for inspiration they just have to take a chance, lots of people are impatient and want you to release music or your opinion or what you think when they want it..”

the times not stop waiting for the inspiration, they say its a flaw being impatient but…

jack huffs “ok..okay ill take a break from working.. ill take a week long break and ill set boundaries with fans and ill talk to pg..”

i just want peace i dont want no smoke

[enhastolemyheart]

JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY! — NISHIMURA RIKI

PAIRING | niki x gn!reader

GENRE | pure fluff, angst (but not really), est. relationship, uni au, mention of Jo from &team, its takes place in a party setting, but there's no content like drugs, alcohol etc. mentioned, i mean cmon i wouldn't do that to niki y'all so its a pg friendly party.

WARNINGS | mentions of food and drinks, Niki ignores the reader, summer au, reader is whipped (lol), niki is too, proofread but please do tell me if any mistakes

PROMPTS USED | 6- "can you stop ignoring me please" and 88- "wait a minute... are you jealous?"

WORD COUNT | 2.5k + (DAYUM, wasn't expecting that-)

A/N | this is my first ever oneshot! thank you @badmuni for requesting! hopefully it's up to your expectations :)) this took a while to write ngl, i was jus under the impression of getting it perfect and trying to rush into it but i realised that i shd write when I'm in a flow and that works best for me!! Enjoy!! I only made it into a uni au so it would fit my idea better so please don't come @ me— reblogs are feedback are very much appreciated!

09:13 pm.

It’s a Saturday night. And your lovely boyfriend took you to one of his friends’ Jay’s party he was hosting as a celebration to start off the summer. 

You honestly did not want to attend. No offence, his friends are great, and they treat you very nicely, but all you wanted to do was spend some time with your boyfriend at home, all cozy in pyjamas and a movie night, maybe even build a ‘lil blanket fort ‘cause why not? And you told him that. But all he did was pull out his signature puppy eyes and his ‘lil signature pout and beg you to go to the party with him. 

‘Please y/n, we rarely hang out outside, and it is summer! So, we should be outside having fun, partying.’ he tries to reason with you.

And of course, you, yes you, being very much whipped for him, lets him have his way.

—

You sit there idly, eyes scanning the crowd of people. And that's a lot of people. Half the universities’ student body is probably here. Your eyes land on your boyfriend, who seems to be dancing with Jay and Sunghoon and jake. They were all situated a few feet away from the table you're sitting in, Heeseung is off to the side dancing with a girl who he has been supposedly seeing for the past two weeks.

You huff not so loudly but it was somehow loud enough for your Niki to hear, and that leads to him making his way over to you, with a huge lovestruck grin on his face. He observed you as walked towards you, doe eyes scanning the crowd, your fingers playing with the brim of the glass you were holding on the table with the other hand. Your hair is neatly styled and flow-y and he loves that look on you, even if you look in everything, this is his favourite.

“Hello baby.”

Your attention from the crowd shifts to lad in a black button-up shirt, sleeves rolled up till it touches his elbows in front of you. You let out a big smile upon seeing his face. You turn towards him in the high stool you were sitting in, leaving the cup on the table, “hello.”

“Are you enjoying the party so far?” he asks as he puts his arms on either side of the stool, caging you in his arms in some sort of way. He leans in and gives a small peck on your cheek causing you to smile even more.

You slowly press your palms against his chest before dragging them upwards and wrapping them around your boyfriends’ neck, “it’s not bad. Just wanted some time with you is all.”

He chuckles lowly before leaning in, pressing a small kiss on your soft lips, “whatever my baby wants, is what my baby gets.” He put his hands in front of you, signaling you to take it. And so you do, and the next thing you know, he’s taking you to a corner of the dancefloor, the floor vibrating because of the bass of the song being played as well as the way the peoples’ bodies are moving like there is no tomorrow.

He gently places his hands on the sides of your waist firmly, yours going around his shoulders. You both sway to the beat together, huge smiles slapped across both of your faces. He even pulls away occasionally to take your palm in his and lightly twirl you around, this move makes you break out in laughter, which causes him to laugh as well, heart swelling. getting close to each other again, your side cheek pressed against his chest and his hands moving lower to your hips.

You bask in each others’ presence. You close your eyes to cherish this little moment you had together, making your night one of the best nights you’ve had. He takes you face in his hands, cradling it while looking into your eyes with the only feeling you both could explain right now.

Love.

His gaze lowers from your orbs to your soft and plump lips. The way they look so kissable right now. He couldn't resist the urge to not kiss you, so he leans in halfway, waiting patiently for you to catch on. You do catch on it the second he looks at your lips, so you lean in the rest of the way, lips finally touching. Both of you break out in grins as you kiss, his hands delicately holding your face and yours wrapping around his waist, squeezing the material of his shirt.

“I love you y/n.” he tucks a piece of your hair behind your ear before looking into your eyes.

You stand on your tippy toes and give him a peck, “and I love you.”

Niki hums as you call out to him, “my feet are getting tired.” he chuckles before taking your hand in his, before making way to the table where you were initially sitting at,  “okay let’s go sit down, I'll get you a drink.”

“Okay.”

You sit down at the table, and he kisses your hand while maintaining eye contact with you before he walks away. You rest your head on your palm as you wait for your Niki, you look at your nails, keeping a mental note to colour them your favourite shade now that you don’t have to worry about school and its rules for the next two months.

“y/n?”

You whip your head towards the direction where that sound came from and you couldn’t believe your eyes. You see your longtime childhood best friend, Jo. He was your partner in crime your whole life up until sophomore year of high school. He had to transfer because of his father’s job but nonetheless, tried to keep in touch but ultimately stopped because school was just getting busy, and now you're soon to be sophomore of college after this summer.

He gets closer to you and you jump out of your seat to greet him in a hug, “Jo? Oh my god how long has it been since I've seen you? How are you?” he lowly chuckles as he pulls away, taking in your features, saying that you didn't glow up would be an understatement. You have matured so much over the course of your last two years of school, features much more prominent and even earning yourself a pretty and amazing boyfriend.

“Yeah, I'm good. It was hard—” Jo gets cut off when he sees a figure approaching from behind you and wrapping their arms around your waist. You lightly jump at the sudden contact but melt into it knowing it is Niki. Niki gives a lip-tight smile to the boy before turning to you, placing a kiss on the crown of your head. He witnessed your ‘lil moment with the boy and did not like it.

“y/n, who is this guy?” Niki asks in a sweet but sarcastic tone, eyes shooting lasers at the poor boy.

“I’m Jo,” he answers before you could, taking a step forward, extending his hand out, “and you are?” 

“I’m Niki, their boyfriend.” your cheeks became hot at the way he introduced himself. More than six months into dating yet he always makes your heart race and cheeks burn. Jo awkwardly puts his hand back down to his side after he sees that the gesture wasn't returned.

“Ah I see,” your friend exclaimed before looking at you, “well it was nice seeing you again y/n, hopefully we can catch up properly.” Niki did not avert his gaze from the boy, he couldn't deny the fact that he was good looking. It made him all insecure.

You reciprocate the smile, “yeah for sure!”

“Bye y/n.”

“Bye bye.” you waved your hand as he walked away. You turn to your boyfriend beside who seems to be avoiding your eye contact, jaw clenched.

“Who was that?” he asked you while looking at you, annoyance (and jealousy) laced in his voice.

You play with the side bangs that are in his eyes, “he was my childhood friend, he moved to Busan after sophomore year of high school. Maybe he is back in town for summer.”

“Yeah you mentioned him.” he huffs, you know that whatever happened a few seconds ago dampened his mood, so you will do whatever to bring back your bubbly boyfriend. 

You were about to lean in to give him a kiss but were interrupted because of Jake who cleared his throat. “Sorry to ruin your guys’ moment, but Niki we need help with the music. Something is wrong.”

“Yeah I'll be there.'' Jake nods and walks away with that. He turns to before handing you your drink and giving you a peck on your lips, “I'll be back okay?”

You hum in acknowledgement and sit back in your stool, sighing.

—

09:56 pm

You didn’t think you’d be in the same position again.

Your head resting on your palm as you wait for your boyfriend. Jake said he just needed help with music, why the hell is it taking so long? You decide to wait for five more minutes but nothing changes. 

Where the hell did Niki go? You get off your beloved seat and start to search for your man. Considering the fact he is a big giant, it wasn’t that hard. You make your way to him, he spots you a few feet away and rolls his eyes looking away. That's weird, was everything okay? Niki doesn’t usually get annoyed with you, only uses the emotion to tease you in case you tease him in the first place and he just pretends to shrug it off when in reality he becomes a blushy mess.

You tap lightly on his shoulder but he ignores it. I pout before pursuing your lips, brows furrowing, trying to decipher why he was ignoring you all of a sudden. He was just giggly and happy and blushing and having fun with you a minute ago. You walk around him to face him and look up at him, he looks like he wants to be left alone, kind of grumpy too. 

“Do you wanna dance? my feet aren’t hurting anymore.” you ask as you take a hold of his wrist, he shrugs it off before looking at you in the eye, with a cold and hard stone face. Why is he acting like this? 

It looked like he was burning holes through your skin when he was staring at you, emotionless, he then turned to the boys, saying that he needed another sprite. Ignoring you once again, he leaves. You don’t hesitate to follow him, you need to know why your boyfriend was acting like that and you wanted to fix it.

You don’t necessarily like this Niki, whenever he acts like this, he gives you the cold shoulder, and you did nothing wrong, or at least you thought you did. He did this one time, he left you in the dark for about two days, but his excuse was because his friends bet him to do that because Niki wanted to prove to them that he isn’t a clingy person.

But you love clingy Niki. The way he shows you care, treats you with kindness and makes you feel divine and like you’re on the top of the world. And you know that he loves treating you like that too.

“Is everything okay Niki? Did I do something wrong?” you ask as you try to reach out to him, but escapes by the mere second, avoiding eye contact with you as he waits for the person before to take a drink and leave.

He tunes out your voice that's asking him so many random questions and just focuses on what’s in front of him.

You wave your hand in front of his face, getting frustrated, “hello?? I'm talking to you. Can you stop ignoring me please?” He doesn’t respond. Instead he just takes a can, pops it open and takes a big gulp of the carbonated liquid. He turned to walk away but you were faster than that. You stop in front of him and take his wrist dragging him to a corner.

“Okay, you are going to tell me why you aren’t talking to me right now. And we are not going anywhere until I get an answer, ” You huff as you cross your arms on your chest and look at him fire in your eyes. Your eyes soften as you sigh, seeing him not moving an inch, “please just tell me Niki, you are worrying me.”

“No one asked you to be so worried about me y/n, why don’t you just go hang out with Josh.”

You raised your head with brows furrowed, “what are you talking about?”

He gulps down the rest of the liquid before throwing it away, coincidentally, the can fell into a bin, “you know what I'm talking about,” he takes a step closer, “you were so touchy and smile-y with that shithead, why don’t you go hang out with him?”

“We were childhood friends, we saw each other after more than 3 years and I didn’t know he would be back in town, “ you as well take a step closer, now only millimetres apart, “I’m sorry I got caught up in the moment I guess, he is just very touchy with people Niki.”

“I still don’t like him.” the boy in front of you utters under his breath.

“Wait a minute. . . are you jealous?” the smirk on your face grew a small bit when he widened his eyes.

“What?! No, of course not!” your boyfriend doesn’t hesitate to scream to defend himself. 

“You were, weren't you?” you look at him with your eyes squinted. He turns red, cheeks heating up, fervently shaking his head to prove your statement wrong. As much as it is cute, you can never get your boy to admit the fact that he was jealous.

You just chuckle before bringing up a hand to his cheek, leaning in and kissing his lips, he kisses back instantly, one hand holding the side of your waist and the other on top your hand that is holding the side of his face. You pull away only to be met with his lips again, he turns his head to kiss you deeper. The both of you pull each other closer, smiling in your kiss before pulling away for real this time. 

“I'm sorry y/n and I love you.” Niki says as he cradles your face in his hands, looking at you with lovestruck eyes.

“It's okay Niki, and I love you too.” you peck his lips, never getting enough of him.

“Now let’s go dance? I wanna show to all the people how great of a s/o I have and how good of a dancer they are.” He says smugly, kissing your cheek. You blush hard and try to avoid his gaze that’s making your cheeks redden even more.

“Yeah. let’s go.”

A/N | Aannnnddddd it's done!! yayy!! less gaurr!! again thank you muni for requesting, hope you liked it ;)) this is my first ever original writing post on here so hoping y'all support me. I am a baby writer so I'm always open to tips and advice!! Thank youu !!

PEACE AND LOVE <33

© ENHASTOLEMYHEART ON TUMBLR, 2023 — do not translate, copy, modify, or repost any of my works as your own in any platform or form of use.

[monstersdownthepath]

Demigod Dossier: Oni Daimyo, part 1

(Pictured: Inma, Empress of the World, the greatest of the Daimyo)

Lawful, Neutral, and Chaotic Evil Incarnations of Debauchery and Depravity The Complete Book of the Damned, pg. 126~127

The Oni are an interesting bunch, to me. Each Oni begins its existence as a Kami, a spirit of the land directly created by the gods to preserve the world, as well as the relationship between nature and those with the power to change it (i.e. mankind). Any kami that fails to uphold the Laws of Golden Perfection, an esoteric series of laws no mortal being could hope to understand, becomes an outcast and is relieved of their duties once their replacement is crafted. Many kami simply fade into nonexistence, while some devolve into mindless nature spirits... but the majority of these disgraced stewards instead evolve into Oni, malicious spirit creatures that can form a physical body once they enter an area of mass death and tragedy.

Upon incarnating, all oni get to experience sensations for the first time. According to oni, their pathetic kami forms don’t feel, see, smell, or taste like their new flesh body does; everything is so much brighter, louder, tastier, more impactful once they have a physical form. So, naturally, oni completely devolve into pleasure-seeking hedonists hellbent on maximizing their exposure to every form of sensation they can get ahold of with the power they possess. Like the Rakshasa that some of them share an alignment with, the oni are intentionally a ‘less severe’ class of fiend a DM can sprinkle into their sessions with lower stakes; oni aren’t conquering worlds or destroying countries. Each one seeks their own satisfaction above anything else, so their villainous actions can be... varied. One may kidnap musicians because they wish to hear a song they wrote played by a professional, one may steal maidens of a specific holy order because their blood tastes the best, and one may level a city block because the buildings were blocking the sunlight shining through their favorite stained glass window. Destructive and scary, but not world-shaking.

The Oni Daimyo we’ll be looking at today are the end result of a very specific process that oni can go through: Oni view mortals as taking the wonders of the world for granted and enjoy punishing those who don’t go out of their way to enjoy what they can have and destroy what they cannot (i.e. anyone who isn’t an evil hedonist). They believe that the greatest pleasures only become so when they’re taken from another... and thus a Daimyo emerges from the horde when it realizes that “another” includes other oni. Browbeating their lesser kin into obedience, all Oni Daimyo acquire the power of a demigod by brute force, tyrannizing lesser oni into providing the ascending fiend with excess and experience until it ignites a divine spark within them. The three we’ll be looking at today are the ones that caught my eye among their small number...

Oni Daimyo work freely and happily with mortals, seeing them as toys, tools, or perhaps even partners and consorts. Whatever role they serve in a Daimyo’s court, those who devote themselves fully to the Daimyo’s ideals can access a cache of divine magic they can exploit. Worshipers receive Boons that are are relatively simple: a trio of spell-like abilities, each of which may be used 2/day. Boons are normally gained slowly, at levels 12, 16, and 20, however entering the Evangelist, Exalted, or Sentinel Prestige Classes can see the Boons gained as early as levels 10, 13, and 16.

Oni Daimyo come across the entire spectrum of Evil alignments, but they’re not demons, devils, or daemons, and thus the Demoniac, Diabolist, and Souldrinker classes are barred to them without DM fiat.

Inma, the Empress of the World Lawful Evil Daimyo of Lavish Wealth, Origami, and Servitude Domains: Community, Evil, Law, Nobility Subdomains: Family, Home, Leadership, Tyranny

Obedience: Craft delicate origami representing those you seek to rule over. Benefit: Gain a +4 profane bonus on saving throws against mind-affecting effects.

Aw, how nice :) Inma is the most powerful of the Daimyo, so it’s ironic to me that she has one of the most peaceful Obedience rituals. Quite a few of the Daimyo, in fact, have rituals that can easily be hidden or passed off as a form of meditation, making it easy to hide your faith in the hedonistic fiends even under close observation. Who in their right mind is going to wonder if you’re evil for folding paper? I do appreciate that Inma doesn’t make you dramatically crush or burn or otherwise dispose of the folded figures, because it means you can unfold the origami and re-use the same sheets for your next Obedience. It’s a small thing, but I like when recycling your ritual materials is an option.

Unlike many Obedience rituals that can be quashed by being robbed or imprisoned, you can perform origami with just about any flat, flexible material of the appropriate size. In a pinch, you can tear cloth into strips and fold them as well. Again, it’s small, but I appreciate the flexibility and ritual resilience.

And the benefit? Incredible. Blanket +4 to saves against the biggest class of Save-or-Suck spells and effects in existence, making you that much harder to charm, Dominate, mislead, distress, and emotionally manipulate. A +4 to saves against ALL mind-affecting effects rather than a subset like compulsions is incredibly rare and should be appreciated for how many times it’ll probably save your life (and your party’s life) over the course of your adventuring career!

Boon 1: Create Treasure Map Boon 2: Charm Monster Boon 3: Extended Dominate Person

Create Treasure Map is a somewhat niche spell, but one I’m happy to have as a spell-like (especially since it ignores the 100gp component cost) rather than needing to use a precious spell slot or waste spells known to have available. It’s a little gruesome, requiring a portion of a slain creature to use--typically a stretch of skin or piece of its hide--but it creates a map between where you’re standing and up to 3 (+1 per 3 levels) caches of whatever that creature considers valuable, along with whatever features and dangers the creature remembers being on the way there. Don’t bother using this on animals and unintelligent beasts as all you’ll get is food stores or perhaps its nest (which, hey, if that’s your objective...), but on various bandits and baddies, you’ll be pointed right to their treasure caches (alongside whatever else they saw as worth remembering). The map even works on any scale, so whether the target’s treasure is 30 feet or 300 miles away, you’ll get your quest objective... just know that the wider a net you cast, the less reliable the map becomes. It notes hazards the creature remembers, but some may be too small to actually show up if the map covers enough territory.

The next two can be lumped together fairly easily, as both are excellent tools at 1/day, let alone the 2/day that your Daimyo grants! Charm Monster is an off-switch for a potentially painful encounter, making a temporary friend out of any monster you may meet on your journeys, which has as many applications as you can possibly imagine. With a duration of a day per level, you can more or less keep a creature (or even several creatures) permanently on your side, perhaps even long enough to convert them into a friend WITHOUT magic, as morally questionable as such a thing may be (but you are Evil, so...). Dominate Person isn’t as flexible when handling encounters as Charm Monster, as it only works on Humanoids and Monstrous Humanoids, but there’s a lot of Humanoids in the world, and two free castings of “gain an ally that will fight for you” that lasts for weeks on end and have no components so even people carefully watching you won’t know you’ve just turned their guards against them. Having the spell be Extended feels like overkill considering it also lasts for a day per level, but if you need to send your new thrall on an extended errand, it can be useful to have them in your pocket for four weeks instead of two. Between these two spells, castable twice each, you can amass an entourage in a shockingly short time... in fact, to preserve the DMs sanity, you may want to limit the Domination to just two creatures at a time!

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Gyuku, the Sea Devil Chaotic Evil Daimyo of Piracy, Tea, and Tsunamis Domains: Chaos, Evil, Strength, Water Subdomains: Entropy, Fear, Ferocity, Oceans

Obedience: Perform a tea ceremony on the shore of an ocean or while blindfolded. Benefit: Gain a +4 profane bonus on saving throws against water-based effects.

Another cute one! Despite Gyuku being one of the most violent of the Daimyo, her daily ritual is a meditation and centering ritual. There’s something ironic about a Chaotic Evil hedonist demanding her followers calmly make tea every day, but I suppose when you’re an Oni, you get really serious about how your food is prepared. I appreciate that in contrast to other oceanic demigods, she DOESN’T lock you to the shorelines like the others do, allowing you to practice your tea ceremony blindfolded if you can’t, for whatever reason, access the sea. Regardless of the alignment of your allies, few will see anything off about you performing such a small ritual every day, allowing you to masquerade as Good, or at least hide your faith from investigators and guards...

It’s an Obedience with no listed cost, but you’re still not likely to perform it if your belongings get pilfered, but you don’t even need a particularly expensive set. Even just a cup of hot water and a single bag of tea will allow you to do something to please your Daimyo enough to get your power for the day... especially if granting you your power would let you wreak havoc on the people who stole from you in the first place.

The benefit is, in stark contrast to the first of the Daimyo, underwhelming. Water-based attacks and spells are few and far between, and most of them are more of an than an inconvenience than something you really need to worry about. In many cases, this just reads “+4 to saves versus being knocked prone,” but there’s nevertheless a decent few Adventure Paths (yes, Reign of Winter; many Cold spells also have the Water descriptor!) where this ability would come in handy... outside of those, though, this benefit is sub-par.

Boon 1: Slipstream Boon 2: Control Water Boon 3: Heroes’ Feast

Alright, cute. Slipstream isn’t an especially useful spell, sitting in the pile of “spells I would never prepare but find inoffensive to have for niche scenarios.” It lasts well over an hour when you first get it and goes up by 10 minutes/level from there, but all it functionally does is add +10ft to the target’s walking speed. Nothing special, but I’m sure the Heavy Armor Enjoyers in the party will appreciate being able to walk at normal human speed for a few hours a day, with the amusing option of getting an extra +10 on top of that if they so happen to be traveling downhill. The real usefulness of the spell is the +20ft to the target’s swim speed, letting them travel with decent swiftness underwater; if they don’t already have a swim speed, they gain one! Unfortunately they don’t get any ability to breathe underwater, but since even weedy little nerd Wizards can hold their breath for over a minute at a time (provided they didn’t dump Con (don’t do this)), it’s not much of an impediment if you just need to dive down and then back up. Think of it like a ‘swim underwater’ spell that has an added bonus once you’re no longer IN the water! That at least makes it less disappointing.

Unlike the next spell, which has a myriad uses. Control Water allows you to create whirlpools, stop floods, create floods, shape water pillars, and generally screw with the depth and shape of enormous patches of water for hours at a time, making you the bane of ships, which is perfect for a follower of a goddess of piracy! Whether it’s trapping victims to make them easy pickings, raising pillars behind you to block off enemies, flooding dockside towns, or slamming Water Elementals and the like with a nigh-permanent Slow, your crew will no doubt appreciate your control over water (though everyone else will likely be a little unenthused),  In other scenarios I’m afraid it’s not as useful, but I’m sure there’s plenty of moments when draining enormous amounts of water from a room or causing even more water to flood out of a specific receptacle would solve a puzzle that’s otherwise halting your party. I do appreciate that Control Water also specifies it can be used “on similar liquid,” though what is similar to water and thus what can be affected by the spell is left up to the DM to decide.

Control Water offers utility to a scurvy dog and the mangy crew, but Heroes’ Feast offers to cure that scurvy and provide the most important resource a captain must be aware of: Morale and loyalty. There’s little that can keep a pirate crew happy like being allowed to eat a Heroes’ Feast every single day, once at breakfast and once again at dinner, and you’re able to whip up a meal for up to 16 people per casting when you first get this ability, which covers yourself, the ships’ officers, and some extra crewmates you’ve grown to like or who you believe deserve the honor. As one of my favorite spells I’ll sing the praises of the Feast every chance I get, and while it may be underwhelming in terms of spells that make you a better pirate, having it available twice a day will, if nothing else, assure sickness, poison, and starvation are no longer a concern on the seas, AND make you beloved by everyone who regularly partakes... and should they get too used to your food, to the point of relying on its availability and not stocking up on their own rations... well, it’d be awful unfortunate if your ‘allies’ didn’t pay for the privilege to continue feasting.

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Nataka, the Red King Neutral Evil Daimyo of Drought, Perfume, and Forest Fires Domains: Destruction, Evil, Fire, Weather Subdomains: Arson, Catastrophe, Seasons, Smoke

Obedience: Meditate within a ring of fire while periodically casting incense into the flames. Benefit: Gain a +4 profane bonus on saves against fire effects.

All three of the Daimyo that caught my attention have a similar theme to their Obedience ritual: It’s simple, easily disguised as a Neutral or Good act, and has no listed cost requirements. Even in this case, the ritual is easily waved off as a ritual to Sarenrae or any other number of benevolent sun gods. After all, like with Inma’s peaceful origami and Gyuku’s lovely tea party, who’s going to suspect you’re serving an evil spirit just because you want to smell nice? The only real problems I can envision are if you’re in an environment where creating a ring of fire is dangerous to the surrounds (in a dry, flammable area) or for you (such as in an enclosed space), though if you’re recklessly Evil you may not care about the former.

There’s not much more to say about it except that you’ll need to stock up with a lot of incense each time you’re in civilization (or learn to craft it yourself!), because you’ll quickly burn (badum-tiss) through your supply even if you’re being conservative with it. The +4 to saves versus fire effects is a very common benefit for Obedience rituals, but it’s always welcome because fire effects themselves are common at every level. From dodging Fireball to ducking beneath a dragon’s breath weapon, it’s boring but it’s likely to be useful for your entire adventuring career.

Boon 1: Flame Blade Boon 2: Extended Cup of Dust Boon 3: Maximized Fireball

Flame Blade isn’t a spell we’ve seen as a Boon before, so here’s the rundown: For 1 min/level, you conjure a scimitar of fire that you can attack with like a normal weapon. It deals 1d8 Fire damage, +1 per 2 HD you have (max +10). Importantly, it resolves as a melee touch attack and, since the Sentinel is an option to gaining the Boons early, it’s your absolute best bet for following Nataka for two reasons: 1) maximum BAB, allowing for iterative attacks with your flaming weapon, and 2) Scimitars are your Daimyo’s sacred weapon, allowing the Sentinel’s Symbolic Weapon ability (+1 to attack and damage rolls per 3 Sentinel levels) to work with the spell! Even if you don’t go into Sentinel, it also benefits from the Warpriest’s Sacred Weapon ability... though it won’t surpass the spell’s base damage until level 10, so that’s more of a later-game thing. Though the list of creatures with Fire Resistance or immunity is long, the creatures without either is just as lengthy, as is the list of creatures who take extra damage or debuffs from Fire. The duration of 1 min/level means it may even last multiple combats, giving you 2 or 3 (or more!) fights where you’re hitting a target’s touch AC, though be warned that the blade is made of pure fire and its damage is thus unaffected by your ability score modifiers. It’s a small but important tradeoff if you rely on high modifiers for their base damage.

Compared to Flame Blade, Extended Cup of Dust feels a little silly. The spell already lasts an eternity, so doubling its duration feels unneeded, as does being able to use it twice a day. If you want someone dead, just hit them four times a round with your sword. This is for making someone suffer, and suffer for a long time. I can see casting it on a fleeing adversary to make their life in the coming days as miserable as possible, but otherwise its only real use is tormenting NPCs or extorting creatures with low saves. Using it on a creature whose power is fueled by their ability to drink something is especially hysterical, but such opportunities will be few and far between. 

Which brings us to... Maximized Fireball. There’s not much to say here that hasn’t already been said about the spell that’s a permanent part of the spell list of every Sorcerer and Wizard from level 5 onward. All Maximized does is assure you’re always getting 60 Fire damage in a 20ft radius explosion. 60 flat damage (30 if the enemy succeeds their save). twice a day. There’s better Boons out there, but against anything not immune to Fire, especially clusters of enemies, you’ll be hard pressed to find them.

[inamindfarfaraway]

The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals Pitch Meeting

[Should be experienced imagining the voice and acting of Ryan George, who is linked to above.]

Producer Guy: So, you have a musical for me?

Screenwriter Guy: Yes sir, I do. It’s called The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals because the main character, Paul Matthews, doesn’t like musicals.

PD: He doesn’t?

SG: No, he can’t stand them. Watching one is his own personal hell. And that isn’t a throwaway quirk, it comes up several times and is integral to the plot.

PD: Isn’t the protagonist typically meant to be relatable to the audience?

SG: Yeah.

PD: And won’t the audience be full of people who like musicals?

SG: Yeah.

PG: Bit of a weird choice, but okay then. So other than the musical thing, what’s Paul like?

SG: Oh, not much.

PG: What?

SG: Yeah, he’s the most average, boring, white middle-class American everyman you can imagine. No desires, ambitions or hobbies; he never expresses much passion for anything except things he doesn’t like. He has an office job at a company that’s so generic, I didn’t even think of what it does. He’s not particularly nice either. Like, when his best friend Bill asks him to help him reconnect with his teenage daughter Alice, he refuses to avoid his own discomfort despite having nothing else to do. And when his other friend Charlotte right next to him is clearly upset because she’s in a miserable marriage to a neglectful, cheating husband, he doesn’t bother to comfort her.

PG: Isn’t the protagonist typically meant to be likeable and interesting?

SG: Yeah, but we’re not gonna do that I decided. So another important character is Emma Perkins, this barista Paul has a crush on. She’s the only reason he keeps going to this crappy café.

PG: And what’s her deal? Is she kind and friendly to balance out Paul being so apathetic?

SG: No, she’s also rude, but she has better reasons for it. She hates her job and has really annoying, mean coworkers her boss favours over her, who just won’t shut up about how great musical theatre is. They all love it so much that there’s a new rule that if they get tipped, they have to perform a whole song and dance routine.

PG: But working for every tip negates the point of a tip!

SG: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I said, it's a crappy café.

PG: I gotta say, though, you’re presenting musical fans in quite a negative light there. They are the people whose money we want.

SG: (aside) You haven’t seen anything yet. Anyway, Emma and Paul bond over not liking things and people - it’s cute. But then at the end of the day, a meteor crashes down in a big storm and lands right in the town’s theatre, which is putting on a musical. And the meteor turns out to have evil alien life inside it!

PG: Oh my God. What happens to everyone in that theatre?

SG: Well, it’s offstage, but we find out later that the alien works by taking over your body like a virus and killing you to use you as a vessel for its hive mind. So that probably happens to most of the people. Bill and Alice get out okay, but a lot of people are dead now.

PG: This escalated very quickly!

SG: Yeah, this show does that. It’s a horror comedy; it’s like a sitcom where anyone could brutally die. But here’s the thing: the alien hive mind makes the Infected sing and dance like they’re in a musical, so all the fun, catchy songs are actually it controlling people’s corpses. That’s how everyone knows the lyrics and can move in time to music nobody’s playing. You only hear the music if you’re Infected. And it spreads really fast, so this mindless musical obsession could literally destroy humanity!

PG: That’s so dark and tonally dissonant. But I have concerns about the villain essentially being a living musical, in a musical. Won’t that kinda alienate the audience? As in ‘make them not like it’, not ‘make them aliens’.

SG: No, it’ll be fun. The first song after the intro is very entertaining. There’s this really funny part with a silly, crazy homeless guy.

PG: Ah, yes. Making fun of the homeless and mentally ill is tight!

SG: Not what I… (moving on) and, and, we can cleverly parody musical tropes. For example, Paul’s boss tries to get him to sing an “I Want” song because the Hive want him to be the protagonist of their ‘musical’, but he doesn’t want anything so he’s a terrible protagonist.

PG: Oh, that was on purpose! I thought you were just a bad writer.

SG: Yeah, no, I’m setting up an arc. So the Hive take over most of the town - which is on a island and the bridge gets pulled up, so there’s no way off - including Emma’s café. But she escapes with Paul and they meet his friends from work, plus this obnoxious asshole Charlotte’s cheating with called Ted, who's the worst. But then the Infected police show up, including Charlotte’s husband Sam. She begs him to snap him out of it ‘cause she still loves him, but he pulls a gun on her.

PG: Oh no.

SG: Fortunately, Ted knocks him out.

PG: Oh, good.

SG: But he hits him too hard and his brain falls out!

PG: Wait, even putting aside how unlikely it is that his flesh and skull were broken open wide enough that his whole brain could fall out, isn’t the brain… attached? That’s a very implausible injury.

SG: I’m gonna need you to get all the way off my back about that.

PG: Well, okay then.

SG: So Charlotte has a mental breakdown and Emma suggests they go to her biology professor, Henry Hidgens. He’s an eccentric doomsday survivalist who somehow predicted this exact incredibly specific apocalyptic situation and has a huge house with top-notch security. And he's a biologist, so he might be able to study the alien infection if they bring him Sam.

PG: It’ll be hard to get there safely with the town swarming with alien zombies, especially carrying a dead man.

SG: Actually, it’ll be super easy, barely an inconvenience.

PG: Oh, really?

SG: That part just happens offstage.

PG: So they get to shelter?

SG: They do, so they start to relax for a bit. Except Charlotte, she’s dying inside and stays with her tied-up dead husband. Bill and Ted have this funny argument where Bill threatens to kick Ted’s head, which, you know, is a stupid threat.

PG: It is?

SG: Yeah, because you’d have to kick really high and most people can’t do that.

PG: I thought you would just push the person to the ground with your arms and then kick their head. Most people can do that.

SG: True.

PG: And it would be highly effective. You could kill someone that way.

SG: (getting an idea) You could, couldn’t you? (writes that down)

PG: What are you writing?

SG: Nevermind. Emma and Paul have a nice heart-to-heart where she reveals her backstory. Turns out she had a sister, Jane, who lived a great life, dream job, true love, kid, everything, while Emma left home at eighteen and travelled around being aimless and irresponsible. But then last year Jane died and that’s why Emma came back and is studying, to try to do something with her life now that Jane can’t anymore.

PG: Aw, that’s sad.

SG: Even a zany horror sitcom has its serious moments. So she and Paul bond some more, until Charlotte and Sam burst in.

PG: Wait, what?

SG: The Hive made her think he’d come back to life and manipulated her into letting him go. Then he just killed her.

PG: Dick move.

SG: Massive dick move! So now Ted gets beaten up by the possessed corpse of the woman he loves, after the last things he said to her were mean because he’s the worst. Fortunately, Hidgens kills the zombies.

PG: Oh, good.

SG: But Alice calls Bill and she’s under attack at her school!

PG: Oh no.

SG: If Bill goes to save her alone he’ll almost definitely die. But Paul volunteers to go with him.

PG: So he won’t be nice to his friends in everyday life, but he will risk his life for them?

SG: Precisely, this is really bringing out his inner hero. But when they get there, Alice is already Infected. She sings a whole song about what a terrible father Bill is and he's so guilty that he failed her that he tries to kill himself with the gun they brought. Fortunately, Paul takes the gun off him.

PG: Oh, good.

SG: But he drops it on the ground, so Alice just shoots Bill herself.

PG: Oh my God! Why did he let go of the gun? That was a very poor decision!

SG: Extremely poor, yes. Alice nearly kills Paul too, but the army rescue him. Specifically this secret special unit that I made up called PEIP that deals with supernatural stuff like magic and aliens that most people don't know about. They're ordered to kill everyone to keep the weird stuff secret, but the leader, General John MacNamara, is a good person so he doesn't do that.

PG: So he lets Paul live?

SG: He does, and he sends a helicopter to take him and Emma off the island.

PG: Paul tells him about Emma?

SG: Uh-huh. He realizes that he's in love and finally does want something: to be with her.

PG: Cool, cool, cool.

SG: Meanwhile, Hidgens and Emma are studying the Infected. Emma theorizes that if the brain of the Hive is in the meteor, they could take out all of them by destroying it.

PG: Is that true?

SG: There's no reason it couldn't be! But Hidgens changes his mind about the Hive being evil, knocks Emma out and ties her and Ted up. Then he opens his house's gates because he wants the Hive to get in.

PG: Why does he think the Hive isn't evil?

SG: Well, he's thinking that since humans are so immoral and harmful we're killing the planet and each other constantly anyway, but the Hive will bring peace and harmony. And he loves musicals.

PG: Oh, he does?

SG: Yeah, he's even written his own awful one, and he plays a song he wrote and composed to lure the Infected inside. He's willing to die and doom humanity for his twisted, irrational love of musical theatre.

PG: Really slamming your audience again. Hey, why wasn't he at the musical the theatre just put on?

SG: I don't know.

PG: Fair enough.

SG: So Paul comes back, frees Emma and Ted and they escape, but General MacNamara kills Ted because the soldiers are Infected now!

PG: And this is all onstage?

SG: Yes.

PG: Then it's gonna be hard to get past a division of fit, armed zombie soldiers who can survive not even having brains in their heads.

SG: No, it isn't. Emma shoots MacNamara in the shoulder and that makes him just give up.

PG: What about all the other soldiers?

SG: Please ignore them.

PG: Okay.

SG: So Paul and Emma get to the helicopter and think they've made it, but the pilot is Emma's mean coworker from earlier and makes them crash.

PG: Why is she Emma's coworker and not just the army pilot, if the Hive got there first?

SG: Because.

PG: That works. Are they okay after the crash?

SG: Paul is, but Emma's too hurt to walk. Paul says they should find a boat -

PG: Wait. There are boats? Or does Paul just think there might be?

SG: I have more notes on this town and it has a boating society, so there are boats.

PG: Then why haven't the Infected got in the boats and gone to mainland? Shouldn't they have done that by now?

SG:

SG: ...You're right. I didn't think about the implications. Oh my God, I didn't think about it!

PG: Whoops!

SG: Whoopsie! So anyway, Emma tells him her theory and he goes to blow up the meteor with a grenade.

PG: But then he could die, and right when he actually cares about something. That is heroic. Do he and Emma have a touching maybe-last goodbye?

SG: Kinda. They try to kiss, but she coughs up blood in his face. The Hive knows Paul is coming and lets him in order to infect him. He does his best to resist its control, but it makes him sing and dance and have an existential crisis.

PG: Oh no.

SG: But at the last possible moment, he pulls the pin, blows up the meteor and saves the day!

PG: Wow, wow, wow. Wow.

SG: So we cut to two weeks later. Everyone else in the town is dead, but Emma was saved by the army reinforcements and she's getting out of hospital on the mainland and ready to start a new life.

PG: Well, at least she survived and the Hive is defeated. That's what Paul wanted. But it's still a shame he died.

SG: That's what Emma thinks... until he walks in!

PG: (excited) What?

SG: Yeah, he's okay and he gives her this soft smile and she's the happiest we've ever seen her and they hug.

PG: That's such a sweet ending. After everything they've been through, getting to be happy together feels earned, and I really have warmed up to them both.

SG: And then Paul starts singing.

[Beat. Producer Guy's relieved expression turns to confusion, shock, sorrow and horror as he processes that information and its implications. He stares at Screenwriter Guy, betrayed.]

PG: But that means he's... (SG nods, proud of himself) and Emma's theory was wrong, and... (SG nods again) the Hive is on the mainland now, so the entire world is... (SG nods again) oh, a very depressing ending!

SG: Set to a very cheerful song! The cast even stay in-character for the bows; the Infected bow while Emma screams and cries and begs the audience for help before being dragged away. So what do you think?

PG: That ending will haunt my dreams. But as creative as the premise is and as emotional as it gets later on, I don't know if this will be that big of a hit. The tone changes so fast and jarringly, the main characters aren't that likeable at first and it all just seems pretty niche. And it spends so much time mocking its own genre and audience. I can see it becoming a cult classic, but I don’t think you’ll be able to launch a series with it or anything.

[helix-studios117]

Halo Reloaded: Greased Lightnin'

The UNSC's recreation dome on this particular evening looked more like a makeshift stage straight out of a high school prom, complete with awkward decorations and an air of charged anticipation. Under the domed ceiling, mimicking a twilight sky, a tarp stretched over supply crates formed a primitive stage. It was here that John-117, alongside Fred-104, Jerome-092, and Kurt-051, planned to redefine Spartan coordination with a twist nobody saw coming.

“Okay, team,” Kurt's voice broke through the quiet as he adjusted a faux leather jacket that looked like it had seen better decades. He flashed a grin that was part challenge, part dare. “Remember, it’s not just about the steps. It’s about the soul. Let’s crank up the charm and dial down the doom.”

Fred, checking his reflection in a handheld mirror, meticulously styled his hair into a gravity-defying pompadour. “Charm’s fine,” he quipped, “but let’s not spin out on those dance moves, eh? And Jerome, for goodness' sake, keep those hip thrusts PG-13. We’re here to entertain, not scandalize.”

Jerome, ever the laid-back counter to Fred’s meticulousness, just shrugged, stretching his neck from side to side. “Fred, when you've got it, flaunt it. And trust me, I’ve got it,” he shot back, a smirk playing on his lips.

The gathering crowd was a mix of Marines and Spartans, the air buzzing with both skepticism and a poorly masked thrill.

Among them, Linda-058 leaned casually against a structural beam, her arms crossed but her eyes twinkling with amusement.

Next to her, Kelly-087 practically vibrated with excitement, her laughter clear and contagious as she leaned in to whisper to Linda.

“Fifty credits says John can’t make it through without cracking up,” Kelly wagered with a mischievous grin.

“You’re on,” Linda replied, her smile sly. “But you're about to lose some hard-earned cash. He’s been in front of the mirror all week, perfecting that Travolta swagger.”

As the first chords of “Greased Lightnin’” ripped through the speakers, John took center stage. His voice was unexpectedly melodic, and his demeanor utterly transformed from the stoic Spartan leader to a showman with a flair for the dramatic.

“Why this car is automatic. It’s systematic. It’s hyyyyydromatic. Why, it's Greased Lightnin’!”

John’s transformation was astonishing. He embodied John Travolta’s exaggerated swagger, complete with swiveling hips and flailing arms that were both utterly ridiculous and strangely captivating.

Fred, Kurt, and Jerome slid in with military precision, their dance moves so sharply executed they were comically mechanical. They were like well-oiled parts of some ludicrous, Spartan-sized jukebox machine, each spin and hand jive hilariously overdone.

The Spartans delivered each line with an over-the-top gusto that turned the classic tune into a parody of itself. “You know that ain’t no shit, we’ll be gettin’ lots of tit!” John sang out, leaning heavily into the campy lyrics, his face split by a grin so wide it threatened to split his head.

Fred took up the next verse with a voice that was a deep rumble, trying—and failing—to keep a straight face. “With new pistons, plugs, and shocks, I can get off my rocks,” he declared, voice booming over the crowd’s burgeoning laughter.

Kurt was up next, channeling an inner rock star that no one, including himself, likely knew existed. “You know that I ain't braggin’, she's a real pussy wagon!” he crooned, punctuating the air with a fist pump that drew whistles and whoops from their audience.

As the song neared its end, the Spartans struck their final pose—John with a comically serious pout and a Travolta-esque finger pointed skyward. The crowd erupted, their applause and laughter echoing off the dome’s walls, a resounding approval of the Spartans’ unexpected comedic chops.

Kelly jogged up to the stage, still laughing, to hand over the credits to Linda. “Best money I’ve ever lost,” she conceded, shaking her head in delight.

Linda just continued to smile, her eyes softening as she watched John hop down from the stage, his comrades slapping him on the back with grins as wide as their leader’s. “Who knew?” she said, the pride evident in her voice, mixed with a touch of relief.

“Certainly not me,” Kelly agreed, “But damn, was it good.”

[luna-louise-13]

This is a snippet of my WIP, a Leo/OC story that's getting way out of hand in the best possible way. 💙 Iteration is mostly 2003, though I like how the boys look in the Bayverse, so that's how I've written them here.

Genre is romance/hurt/comfort/angst, warnings are...well, there's a little bit of blood here? The rating of this piece is PG-13(ish) but there is a LOT of 18+ only content in the story itself. Enjoy!

It was late—later than he’d said he’d be—and Miranda’s stomach twisted like a pretzel. She had an early shift tomorrow, so she should have been in bed hours ago. But instead of even trying to sleep she paced her tiny apartment, nervously (but quietly) plucking her guitar so she wouldn’t keep checking her phone. 

Leo was fine. His brothers were fine. They were skilled and strong and totally able to keep themselves safe from whatever the city threw at them. Miranda’s rational brain knew this. But her stupid, anxious heart hadn’t gotten the memo and refused to slow down. 

When her phone buzzed in her pocket, she almost dropped her guitar in shock. But when she fumbled the device free, Leo’s text flashed across the screen: Here. 

Miranda almost wept with relief. She set her guitar on its stand and lunged for the window, unlatching it to let Leo inside. As always, he slipped through the small frame with a grace that still surprised her, given his size, and stepped into her studio. He filled the small space, his scarred body still tense from whatever his night had brought him, and she was reminded again—like she could ever really forget—that he was a warrior, first and foremost.

Then his blue eyes fixed on hers; he sighed heavily, her Leo once more. “Sorry I’m so late. Things got a little crazy.”

That was probably an understatement, knowing him. Miranda tried to play along. “Hey, it happens.” 

“How was your day?” he asked.

“Uneventful,” she replied. “I got another headache at work, but luckily it slowed down, so I could leave early.” Well, unlucky for her tips—and her bank account—but she had a gig this weekend, so hopefully she could make up the difference.

“Another one?” Leo went to take her hands, but paused and glanced at his. “One sec.”

She watched as he went to the kitchenette to wash his hands. But when he turned to face her again, he stepped into the light, giving her a better look at him. 

“You’re bleeding,” she said, skimming her fingertips lightly over his left bicep.

He frowned at the cut, one of at least three new ones she could make out. “It’s not that bad. You don’t have to…”

He trailed off as she pulled out the first-aid kit she now kept stocked. “I can’t have you bleeding all over my stuff,” she said wryly, though her insides still twisted at the thought of how he might’ve gotten hurt. “Sit down, please.”

Leo obliged her, as he always did, gently placing his katana beside her guitar before he settled onto her couch. He watched her daub rubbing alcohol on his cuts, not flinching once. “I don’t like worrying you,” he said quietly. 

“Oh, I wasn’t worried,” she replied lightly. “I’m not even tired. I was just working on a new song.” She winked at him. “Actually, I’d forgotten all about our plans tonight.”

He chuckled, his gaze still on her. “Is that right?”

Miranda tossed the bloodied cotton pad away and brandished the tube of antibiotic ointment. “Yeah. In fact…who even are you again, mister?”

He gave her a wry look. “I’m that forgettable, huh?”

“What? No,” she replied, all traces of teasing gone. He knew she was kidding, right?

But before she could say anything else, he wrapped one arm around her waist, pulling her down beside him on the couch. He plucked the ointment out of her hand and tossed it aside, then held her close, his mouth brushing her ear as he spoke. “Maybe I can remind you.”

He added a gentle nibble on her neck, sending a thrill of pleasure through her entire body. “Hmmm,” she murmured as he kissed her neck again. “Starts with an L, I think?”

“Good start,” he said in her ear, making her shiver. “But we’ll have to keep going.” 

[hairstevington]

Welcome to my blog!

For those who are new (hiii <3), I’m Frenchie, and I figured I'm official enough now to have an introduction post, so here's some basic info, FAQ, and a Masterlist of my content so far!

I reblog exclusively Stranger Things content here, although surprisingly I DO have other interests :o

I have an Ao3 account under this same username, if that's your thing!

I keep my writing and this blog PG-13 (with language/drug use and mild sexual content), so if you're looking for explicit stuff I am not the writer for you!

Favorite ship is Any Character x Peace and Happiness (also I love writing Steddie and Lumax has my whole heart)

Every time I get a comment, like, reblog, or feedback of any kind, my heart grows three sizes. Seriously, I'm so honored when people enjoy what I write!

Always looking for new internet friends!

~~~~~~~~~~

Masterlist:

Note: WIP's are “Eddie Munson vs the World,” "we can be heroes," and “every city’s got a graveyard." Ficlets won't be linked here but I will have them all tagged under "dailydrabble"

Stranger Things (follows the general canon of the show):

"Back to the Future (Hawkins Edition)" - (OC travels back in time and lives through the canon show, season 4 fix-it, 132K words) this one is my fav you guys go read it on Ao3 here

“i’m counting the days to the rapture” - (all canon characters who died on the show reunite, 40K words) found here and on Ao3

“Every city’s got a graveyard” - (Buffy x Stranger Things crossover) - still in its early stages but the first chapter can be found here!

Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington:

“songs that voices never share” - (alternate canon Steve goes deaf after season 3 and meets Eddie, who can sign, 70K words) found here and on Ao3

"we can be heroes" - (Part 2 of the Deaf Steve AU, season 4 rewrite/fix-it in Eddie's POV) found here

“I wanna cut to the feeling” (modern day AU enemies to lovers slow burn feat Rockstar!Eddie and Hairstylist!Steve, 79K words) - Chapter 1-5 found here, the rest found on Ao3!

“I can’t tune you out” - (Rockstar!Eddie/Musician!Steve fake dating enemies to lovers slow burn, 113K words) found here and on Ao3

"Freaky Friday (Steddie's Version)" - (enemies to lovers body swap shenanigans, 36K words) found here and on Ao3

"flowers and ink" - (tattoo artist x flower shop modern day au, 21K words) found here and on Ao3

"Stranger Therapy" - (first date at couples counseling with Dr. Murray, 13K words) found here and on Ao3

“Eddie Munson vs the World” - (very camp WIP in the style of Scott Pilgrim) found here

“That ‘90s Fic” (post-canon cute fic for the Valentine’s Day fic exchange 2023! 5.5K words) found here and on Ao3

“Daisies” (requested one shot of Eddie giving his best friend Steve flowers for Valentine’s Day) - found here on Tumblr and here on Ao3

"mysterious ways" - (Steddie week 2023, Kas!Eddie/Steve post canon season 4, 12K words) found here and on Ao3

“The Marriage of Bigfoot and Mothman” found here and on Ao3

"Do I wanna know?" - (modern day AU fluffy one shot) found here and on Ao3

STWG April Fools Day Swap (one shot where Steddie saves a wounded bunny) found here

“Like real people do” - (one shot written for the STWG’s Hozier collection, 1K words) found here

"Well, this is new" found here. The follow-up, "A Different Kind of Nervous," is only on Ao3 (idk why lol). Part 3, “Hands,” found here. Ao3 links for part one, two, and three

Robin Buckley x Nancy Wheeler:

“No Way” (featuring one of my fav lines I've ever written) found here, Ao3 link here

“Best Friends” (another tumblr exclusive!) found here

“I wanted her to look at me” (aka Robin liked Nancy instead of Tammy Thompson) found here, Ao3 link here

The Fruity Four (Robin/Nancy/Steve/Eddie):

“Barb is alive!” (AU request) here, Ao3 link here

"Teleplatonic" (Robin can read Steve's mind, no romance just Stobin) here, Ao3 link here

“Who looks like the better kisser?” - (very short and sweet) found here, Ao3 link here

“This is gonna be fun” (aka the two couples decide to be each other's beards) found here, Ao3 link here

"Steve is NOT Straight" (feat platonic Stobin baybeee) here, Ao3 link here

Misc Content (not fic related):

Steve Harrington (Taylor’s Version) - collab with the Tumblr bestie! Found here

Chaotic Stranger Things Headcanons (part one, part two, part three)

Songs that I associate with the characters

Steve Harrington as a cat AU (shitpost collab with my Tumblr bestie, truly a treat and v chaotic, you'll love it)

Cover art for my fic “I can’t tune you out” done by my Tumblr bestie 🥰

How the characters would react to you coming out

Random hair opinions

I still might write this essay on S4 costuming lol

Robin/Nancy parallel with Steve (lowkey sad but also go Ronance) found here

Ronance evidence - found here

My Maya Hawke concert experience!

Byler x Scott Pilgrim meme - found here

Joe Quinn moments - First late night appearance and the falling blooper

List of confirmed JQ improvised moments

Very valid question

Stancy x Taylor Swift (Midnight Rain) found here

Quick Steddie headcanon

Steve is simply A Dad (and I love him)

Theory about season 5, Eddie, and inconsistencies

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Inbox is always open for questions, concerns, feedback, hot takes, requests, or literally whatever as long as you're not weird about it.

Love youuuuuu

[jmdbjk]

More Legos...

(if you must, Jimin...)

After obsessing over whether the camera was straight enough, or were the lights too bright, whether the distance he was from the camera was good (obsessive perfectionist) he finally gave us the big news that his album is coming in MARCH!

Here are my preliminary notes and thoughts on the upcoming and very anticipated PJM1:

Track 1: shook and light-headed

Track 2: shook and drooling

Track 3: shook and finally taking a breath

Track 4: shook and uwu-ing

Track 5: shook and drooling again

Track 6: shook and picking myself up off the floor

Track 7: shook and sobbing because it’s the last song.

But of course, in my delulu mind there will be 13 tracks but let’s not get greedy...

Prediction: Jimin’s next live will have him building the LEGO BTS Dynamite set... 

Off-topic...look, Namjoon posted a recent pic of Jungkook on his Instagram stories:

Joon’s also deleted or archived all his Instagram posts except 13 that have to do with Indigo... WHAT’S UP WITH THAT???

Back to the main event: Jimin talked about straightening his teeth again. The best option for him is probably the Invisalign that you can remove when necessary. I wonder if the process is something he can be doing while he’s enlisted. 

He laughed and said “what do we have to fight about?” when someone asked him if he and Tae still fight a lot. As he continued reading the comments he said “Marriage!... one day. I’m too busy right now to get married.” I don’t know if the comment was “marriage one day” or if “one day” was part of his own response. He spoke a little about Jin. It’s clear that Jimin looks up to Jin. 

It was so cute when he was making fun of himself being so shy when he was recording Vibe with Taeyang.

My man with some plastic flowers he made with his own two hands:

Losing track of what day it is, having to figure out Valentine’s day is almost here... same babe, same...

I know some people sort of made a big deal over his comments about this. First of all, Jimin, no one said anything about White Day... second of all, he said “it’s fun” ...isn’t that enough to show that he acknowledges them? You guys with the hardcore ideas that certain things MUST be considered in a certain way ... GET OUT OF YOUR CLOSED BOX! He acknowledged they are special days that are fun. Why isn’t that enough? 

Then he talks about showing us his moon tattoos and letting us know there will be an opportunity to do so...he’ll have a chance to show us. Because whipping off his shirt on a live would probably get him scolded worse than JK drinking while doing a live.

He also commented about Namjoon being “truly like a gift” in his songwriting skills.

Then mentions Suchwita...and gives us a spoiler:

Yoongi and Jimin drinking and talking about Jimin’s solo album... YES! PLEASE MAKE THIS HAPPEN UNIVERSE! DON’T TEASE ME AND THEN LEAVE ME SHATTERED IF IT DOES NOT HAPPEN!

You know... occasionally a comment that seems odd could very well hold a considerable amount of meaning:

Tears from working himself to the bone because of his passion to give his best to us... tears because of how moved he was from seeing all of us while performing... tears because when you are filled with fear and insecurity and see the outpouring of love... tears from the words he sees being said about him online... he says if he has to find a reason as to why (he’s not as emotional any more) he says it’s like as time has gone on, he’s not seen us in person, that his emotions have subsided. He is removed from personal appearances but still the fact they’ve achieved a certain level of success enables him to feel secure in his position and they can see we, Army, are not going to leave them. He’s also removed himself from social media.

He can be so unserious too... clocked out... hahahahaha... and that’s 12:30 a.m., 1:00 a.m. 

When Unholy comes on he laughs, smirks, and he skips the song BECAUSE HE KNOWS ITS UNHOLY...(keeping it PG for Armys). We know Jimin was at work but now we know he continued watching JK’s live because he knows that Jungkook sung this.... okayyyyy. 

We also had the pleasure of listening to Jimin hum/sing along to The Astronaut, Rush Hour, That That, Better Than This by Lauv, Safe Zone, Yet to Come, Closer, Empty Road by Taeyang, Wildflower, Telepathy, Euphoria (which he admitted he loves and he let it play twice and then continued to sing it), Filter to which he commented that he was really bummed out when he never got to perform this for us live and that HE MAY ONE DAY DO THAT ASDAFWTFOMFG!!! 

Someone in comments said they needed Jimin to motivate them and that they hated themselves... those were serious words and Jimin paused to consider his response... he said “you should still know how to cherish and like yourself. I think it actually isn’t easy to accept this usually. I think you should know why you are thinking in that manner (you should figure out what is causing you to think that way) and I think I need to hear you out in order to say something to you (I need to know more about the situation in order to offer constructive advice). Even so, you only have yourself. I hope you don’t hate yourself too much.” Words from a man who has perhaps had his own dealings with this sort of thing.

He wrapped it up by saying he’ll talk about the making of PJM1 after it’s release for us to stay safe and stay well. 

The thought occurred to me: is it just me or has the number of times that the idea of the members dating increased exponentially these last few months? 

Namjoon flippantly(?) saying "kind of like a girlfriend for me" during Big Brain/Useless Knowledge TV Show. (What is the title of that show? I keep forgetting...)

Both Jimin and Jungkook teasing Armys who comment "let's date for a few seconds" while doing their live broadcasts. 

And the big rumor of Tae’s that I won’t mention because people are irrational and I don’t have time for that.

Jimin even said there’s more comments about marriage these days than ever before. Beyond “Marry Me Yoongi,” the topic of marriage just seems to pop up more frequently. 

Are they attempting to normalize Tannies dating? Just like they've normalized (sorta) showing more skin? and normalized their inevitable enlistment. Are they are making us take baby steps for everything?

Is this part of Chapter 2/more mature Bangtan agenda? Please feel free to discuss below...

[kmgkmg]

EVERYTHING - LEE HEESEUNG

word count: 2.8k…

pairing: heeseung x gn!reader

synopsis: you are a freshly moved in tenant to a cheaply priced apartment, but is it too good to be true?

genre/s: fluff, non-idol!au, strangers-to-lovers, enemies-to-lovers more of a miscommunication trope, college student!reader, neighbor!heeseung

warnings: none!

rating: pg

a/n: for @dearhee!! hi, i was matched with you for the @kflixnet's exchange event! i'm a bit shy so i didn't message you, but i've enjoyed seeing your posts on my dash ^^ i hope you enjoy this short oneshot piece! the title is based off of everything by kehlani. i had a hard time choosing between her song and butterfly dream by khalil fong, also i did kinda get carried away and made you a fic playlist! and an older outdated playlist i made for heeseung a while back if you'd like to listen to it! sorry this author's note is so long omg.

Brown moving boxes cluttered your new living room. Sure, it looked a bit barren and depressing from the boxes and bubble-wrapped items lying around, but those would be dealt with right after you finished your coursework. Sitting down at the kitchen table you and Jungwon assembled just hours ago, your mouse hovered over the pause button of your laptop.  

You were attempting to finish the recorded lecture your professor posted yesterday. Latin American Politics seemed like a fascinating topics course to take, and to top it off, the professor had stellar reviews from classmates. Who would’ve known that you were getting yourself into the most intensive courses you’ve taken to date? The readings were interesting and you never had a problem completing them, but what drove you insane was the exams. Your professor would always include questions that would leave a lot up for interpretation, yet he would grade it seemingly randomly based on his mood.  The other half of the questions would require you to know a decent amount of outside information since he would ask questions that were never discussed in class or case studies, but would be relating to relevant precedents.

Something that was quickly driving you insane was your next door neighbor. You hadn’t had the chance to introduce yourself yet, but for almost the entire time you tried to watch the lecture, music could be heard through your shared wall. You thought the noise would subside if you waited long enough, but your patience finally met its limit when they turned up their music enough for you to feel the bass. 

This isn't how you imagined introducing yourself to your neighbors. You weren’t hoping to be best friends with them or anything, but you definitely didn’t think you’d be storming over to their doorstep at 11pm to complain. Still, it’s a weekday. How could they not have the common sense to be courteous of those who needed to wake up early in the morning?

Opening your door, you walked over and knocked three times on the door. A man with grayish blonde hair opened the door with a quizzical smile flashed towards you.

And maybe, no, definitely, his looks would’ve been more noticed by you on any other day. But you had an oral exam to finish polishing to present in front of your professor and classmates. 

“Can you lower your music please? I’m trying to study and it’s distracting,” You request, without paying much attention to your neighbor’s confusion gradually showing on his face. 

“I wasn’t playing any music though?” He innocently replies.

“For the past forty minutes I’ve listened to music from your side of the wall, don’t act innocent,” You groan. 

He smirked at you, “Sure, I can ‘turn it down’,” emphasizing the last part by using air quotes with his hands. 

“What do you mean with the air quotations?” You frown, imitating the air quotes he made moments ago. 

“Don’t you think you owe me a favor for turning down my music? I mean it is my apartment, I should be able to act how I want. Not my fault that the building’s walls are thin,” He shrugs. 

Of course, your neighbor is entitled. Just great. 

“You won’t turn it down? Okay, there’s an easy solution. What was the landlord’s number again? I think filing a noise complaint would make my problem solved real quick,” You answered, unlocking your phone screen and showing the dial pad screen to him.

His smirk fades, “Alright, alright, I’ll stop playing my music and singing,” taking your phone and typing a number onto it, “here’s my number.” He extended his hand to you with your phone placed on his palm. 

You snatched your phone back, narrowing your eyes at him. “Why give me your number? So you can bother me through texts and phone calls instead?” You scoff, already heading back to your apartment next door. 

“You can message me instead of our landlord when I make noise again,” He waves, before slamming his door behind you. 

Asshole.

One thing you absolutely hated was hot weather. Without the A/C on in the middle of today, a day that was record-breakingly hot, you felt certain you would melt any minute now. Your landlord sent out an email to all of the tenants in the morning explaining that the A/C broke and would probably be repaired by tonight. You didn’t need her email to wake you up though. You were already awake, sweating profusely. The comforter had long been thrown to the floor. You stumbled sleepily to your thermostat which read as 100°F/38°C. Outside it was a bit cooler, but being outside only exposed you to the blazing sun. It was truly choosing the lesser of two evils. 

What made the day even worse is that you ran into your annoying neighbor, whose name you learned is Heeseung, as you went outside to make a quick run to buy some cold snacks. It did make it slightly better when he was covered in as much, if not more sweat than you. You couldn’t revel in his misfortune for too long though. He miraculously managed to trip over his doormat, falling onto you. Both of you scowled at each other while childishly wiping each other’s germs off yourselves. 

He hadn’t played his music anymore since the day you confronted him, but he did sing nearly everyday. If you weren’t studying, you couldn’t help admiring how talented he was. His vocals sounded like they came straight from a CD. But your appreciation for his talent never lasted long, since he always had an intuitive sense to bother you. 

Y/N, I sound good, don’t I?

How would you feel if I serenaded you sometime?

Don’t you think a guy who can sing is sooooooo hot?

Have any song requests Y/N?

His texts immediately removed any hint of charisma his music might’ve given him. Heeseung knew that his texts drove you insane, and if you were just an ounce less nice than you were, he would’ve been blocked a long time ago. Still, he had texted you about a week ago informing you he’d be redoing the foam sound panels he installed a couple years back in order to hopefully be more soundproof for your sake. While you felt relieved that you would finally have some peace and quiet after weeks of living with his incessant noise, it was bittersweet. You had grown used to his singing, occasionally singing along to the songs you knew. Although, it didn’t change the fact that he was still arrogant as ever whenever he interacted with you. 

Snapping out of your thoughts about Heeseung, the elevator doors opened on your floor. You looked down into the plastic bag of goods you got from the convenience store and sighed disappointedly at the distorted shape of the ice cream you bought. 

“Sorry if the phone was cut out, I was in the elevator. But Jake, I’m going to die in this heat!” You whined through the phone, searching your pockets with your free hand for your keys. 

“Why don’t you just come over to my place then?” He offers generously.

“That would give me the perfect excuse to see Layla…” You trail off, tempted by your friend’s invitation. 

“See, Y/N just come over and we can eat some ice cream to cool down,” Jake persuades you further. 

“You know, I actually got ice cream and other stuff and I’m pretty sure it melted on impact the moment I stepped into this damn complex,” You reveal, lightening up at the sound of Jake’s laughter. 

You finally found your keys and unlocked your door, noticing the fan by your door. There was a Post-It note attached to it: You seemed to need it more than me - Seung. He was definitely sweating more than you earlier, so why would he give his fan to you?

“Jake, my annoying neighbor just left me a really nice fan to use?” You tell him, still glancing over the note. All of a sudden? For no reason? Your suspicions grew as they usually did, sure that he must have an ulterior motive. Nevertheless, you carried the fan and your melted snacks into your apartment. 

“You mean the neighbor with the angelic singing voice?” Jake asks to confirm he was thinking about the same neighbor. 

You open your fridge, placing each item in their designated spot, “You heard him one time, Jake.”

“One time was enough, Y/N. Dude’s got the voice of an angel for real,” Jake stands his ground. 

Rolling your eyes, you take out the semi-frozen pineapple juice you put in the freezer hours ago. The original plan was to drink it for yourself, but it couldn’t stop bothering you that Heeseung had seemingly been nice for no reason. The fan he gave you blew cold air and if you wanted it to be even colder you could add cold water or ice to a compartment. It was expensive, you could tell from the look of it alone. Also, you did happen to browse for fans while you were waiting in line at the convenience store. Was the fan in front of you the one you considered buying? That’s not important right now…

“Y/N?” Jake’s voice snaps you away from your thoughts. 

“Sorry, give me a sec,” You grabbed the plastic bag on the counter and added the frozen pineapple juice and gummies to it. It’s not equivalent to his fan, but at least it’s something. 

You reopened your door, preparing to hang the bag on his door handle and go back to your conversation. What you didn’t expect was Heeseung to be walking in the hallway, humming a song while twirling his keys with one hand and carrying takeout in the other. He caught you in the middle of what was supposed to be a discrete delivery, raising his eyebrow in amusement. 

“And what do I owe the pleasure, Y/N L/N?” He moseyed over to you, flashing one of his infamous smiles at you. 

“I just left some things in the bag since you gave me that fan. I appreciate it, but um, if you don’t want the snacks since you just got food, I can grab it later,” You mumbled, trying to scurry back into your apartment since Jake was definitely going to tease you about any interaction you had with Heeseung. 

“Wait, is that the angelic neighbor, Y/N?” Jake’s voice practically booms from your phone. You must’ve accidentally pressed the speaker button. Heeseung’s smile only grows wider as he looks at your phone, with you being completely mortified and hanging up on your best friend. 

“Angelic neighbor, huh?” 

“Don’t let it get to your head, Heeseung. That’s just my friend’s nickname for you,” You attempt to crush anything he was imagining, matching his cheeky energy. 

“Aw, so you talk about me that much? I’m flattered, really,” He places a hand on his heart, closing his eyes in a feigned earnest expression. 

“He heard you singing one time, Heeseung. Then, I mean I might’ve told him you were always singing with that flawless voice of yours, but that was it really,” You rambled, not thinking much about the words that were coming out of your mouth. 

“Flawless voice…” He repeats, turning shy at the surprise compliment you gave. 

You were completely unaware of what you said, still trying to make your way back to your apartment. 

“Anyways, if you don’t have anything else to say I’m going to head back into my place…” You point with your thumb to your door, confused as to why he suddenly turned so quiet. 

“Thank you.” 

Now it was your turn to be surprised, “For what?”

“I’ve been going to all these auditions but keep getting rejected. Each place I go nitpicks my technique, but you called my voice flawless. I guess I really needed to hear that right now,” Heeseung explains, now fidgeting with his keys. 

The puzzle pieces started falling into place, “So that’s why you’re always singing?”

He nodded in response, “The first day you came over to my door, I was practicing for a callback the following morning. I knew that we were expecting a new tenant and sure, I heard you moving things in, but moving in took me like three days. The last time someone new moved in was me, which was two years ago. So, I just assumed that you would still be moving in. It didn’t occur to me that you could’ve moved all your stuff in one day. I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I was making that much noise that night, I didn’t know you were all moved in yet.”

His sincere apology surprised you for the second time, “I’m sorry, too. I’m a law school student and I was prepping for an exam that determined a huge part of my grade. I can get a bit sensitive to sounds when I’m studying for exams,” You apologized back. 

Heeseung’s fingers stopped fidgeting with his keys as his expression softened, “Thank you for the snacks, I’ll enjoy them, Y/N.”

The warmth in his voice as he said your name made you flustered, used to him only saying your name in a teasing tone, “Y-Yeah, no problem. Thanks for the fan, I’ll use it well.”

“Oh, before I forget, I was going to drop off one of these sandwiches by the fan if you weren’t home yet,” He reaches into his takeout bag and hands you a sandwich. 

Today must be the day he decided to endlessly surprise you since he handed you your regular order from the local deli, “How’d you know my order…?”

“About a week ago, you made an UberEats and the delivery person knocked on my door first,” He nonchalantly explained. 

“Ah, I see. But why are you being so nice to me? I mean it’s a complete 180 from this morning,” You question him, still suspicious of his kindness. 

“I just woke up when I tripped into you earlier. Also, I absolutely hate hot weather so I would’ve made that face if I bumped into anyone,” Heeseung answers, “I hope that we can get along from now on.”

You nod in agreement and thank him for the fan and sandwich once again before parting. 

Finally back in your apartment, you FaceTimed Jake only to be met with the faces of both him and Jungwon. 

“Tell us everything!” 

Months had passed since Heeseung and you finally cleared up your misunderstandings. Your once sour relationship with him had turned into a strong friendship, spending most of each other’s free time with each other. 

His love as a friend was anything but conventional. He knew all of your details, from the first time you officially hung out and watched the newest John Wick movie to the time when you went to a dog cafe together, he was always attentive to you and your interests. You were equally attentive to him, recommending songs that would suit his voice, or sending videos about fishing since it was his hobby. Jake had grown closer to Heeseung as well, reporting back to Jungwon each time you and Heeseung would gush about each other. 

It was obvious to everyone that you loved each other. Well, obvious to everyone but the two of you. That was, until one fateful summer night spent on the apartment’s rooftop with each other. You were watching a fireworks show in the distance, enamored with the various colors filling the dark night sky. 

“Isn’t it stunning, Seung?” You exclaimed happily, not breaking your attention from the fireworks in front of you. 

He wasn’t looking at the fireworks though. His eyes were fixed on you beside him, taking in everything you are, “Yeah, absolutely stunning.”

You turned towards him, only to be met with his unwavering gaze, “Heeseung?”

He softly led you to the table and chairs on the rooftop, hinting that he wanted to sit down next to you. You followed him, picking up when he wanted to say something.

After a deep breath in Heeseung began, “Y/N, I love the way you teach me about things I never would have thought to learn about. I love the way you listen to my concerns and nonsensical excited rants about my favorite shows or album releases. I love your extrovertedness and willingness to help those around you. I love your laugh. I love you.”

“Heeseung, I love you too,” You reply, unable to properly formulate all the reasons why you loved him. If you started listing the reasons why you loved him, you feared you would never stop. 

But your confession back was enough for him to shine brighter than any of the fireworks you watched before, “Really?”

You smile at him, causing him to envelop you in a hug. 

Who would’ve thought that your noisy neighbor all those months ago would end up being the person you loved?

[bloodpen-to-paper]

Movie Review Blurbs: The Super Mario Bros. Movie

The Highlights

-The brothers were the most endearing part for me, they had a wonderful dynamic that not only made me like them as a duo, but as individuals (from the Mario media I know, there wasn't much focus on their personality so it was nice watching something that gave them more character)

-Jack Black got to sing his silly songs and honestly that's all that matters

-The movie making fun of the egregious Italian accents in the beginning was a good gag, especially considering the two are still Italian in the movie and are given more accurate accents (also I love that they're canonically from Brooklyn lmao)

-Mario was a fucking crack head before the isekai and I enjoy that fact very much

-Yoshi avengers end credit scene

-Surprisingly decent voice acting, they all delivered (especially Charlie Day and Jack Black)

-The penguins, the Dry Bones, SHY GUYS

-Toad is a fucking criminal apparently who helps outsiders break into the castle and goes outside the Mushroom Kingdom to do god knows what

-Off the top of my head, my favorite part of the movie was Luigi running from the Dry Bones and ending up in Luigi's Mansion; great horror scene for a very PG movie

-Whatever the fuck was going on between Kamek and Bowser

-SHY GUYS SHY GUYS SHY GUYS SHY GUYS SHY GUYS-

-Mario and DK's frienenemy relationship was great, especially with how they butt heads but also understand (daddy issues) and respect each other (they're a good ship ngl)

-I liked Cranky Kong as a character, I feel like he was a character made to appeal more to an older crowd now that I think about it

-The implications? Of Bowser's entire fucking ship coming to the human realm? And totaling the city? Magic is real? What's gonna happen there is the U.S. government gonna try and harness the power of the magic realm and capitalize on it like there is so much left unanswered

-simp bowser lmao (many dudebros were mad about this one which automatically makes it the best plotline in my book)

-Mario and Peach weren't shown to have romantic feelings for each other, giving them time to actually get to know each other first

Criticisms

-Ok so let's address the main issue; the pacing. The movie severely lacked transition, bridging and buildup, and it felt less like a movie and more like a bunch of individual scenes thrown together (cause it kinda was). It was frustrating cause the movie was genuinely very engaging, and there was some real lost potential with how rushed it was. It definitely needed to be longer; I think the people working on it were on a time constraint, and it showed

-Pigging-backing off the previous note, a lack of build up to big moments made those moments feel like they came out of nowhere. it also lacked an after math period for those big moments, which makes them feel unsubstantial

-Ok rant time: I saw people having this concern for Peach being a dull #girlboss character that lacked substance, and... yeah, it happened. I think the issue of female characters being sidelined and not given any character depth is being acknowledged, but in a way that still doesn't give them depth. Basically, male creators have realized they've been making female characters useless love interests in the background, so they're fixing this by making said characters hyper-competent, and in the forefront of the fight. However, its had this adverse effect where these hyper-competent characters are now just serving as plot devices to push the narrative rather than being given their own character narrative. They are at the forefront, and fight, but are still lacking in depth and development (what's worse is they still just serve as aides to male leads most of the time, just now in a repackaged way that usually would be held by a side male character). The Mario movie was rushed so none of the characters got much development, but Peach in particular was not given any character development, only plot development (she got isekai'd and is wondering where she's from, but we don't see how this idea effects her emotionally or drives her because... it really doesn't. She's just kinda like "oh hey I'm from another universe... ok cool! Anyway-"). So yeah, that needs work. Male creators need to humanize their female characters like they do the male ones, and actually give them flaws and struggles (Peach literally has a gag about being so perfect she mastered the super hard parkour course they practice on in one go, while we see Mario work on it and improve over time; its lazy ass writing cmon now). Hence why I like consuming media that's actually by female creators, and I encourage all of you to do the same

-Mario and DK were great but again needed more fleshing out, they had this whole bonding moment about their daddy issue but it happened so fast that you couldn't really stew in it much

-Mario/DK's daddy issues were not handled the best, they only got their father's approval when they did something cool and not for actually being themselves; didn't like the messaging there very much

-Though I mentioned Mario x Peach didn't happen, the movie still very intrusively pushes the idea in your face by having side characters comment on it; I imagine this is what homophobes think they're experiencing when queer character exist in media, except this movie didn't even try to be subtle with the push

-Why did Toad just decide to help Mario find Luigi? Why did Peach decide to train Mario so she could take him with her to Donkey Kong Island? Just cause he's a fellow human? And why did she just decide to take Toad along too? Again, pacing

-Rainbow Road being a "secret path" that was literally out in the open and Bowser found it almost immediately lmao (it was also never narratively explained how Bowser found the path if I'm remembering correctly)

-The Luma gag was overdone imo, but the "finally, mercy" part was very funny

-no bowuigi sex scene -∞/10

Final Thoughts

Overall, the movie was very fun, but the time constraint really did bring it down from being a better ranked movie. Its frustrating because the movie had so much to offer, I wanted more from it, and that's why the pacing is something I'm hammering on so much. And for anyone saying "its a kid's movie, who cares?"... sorry I want kid's to have good movies? And not just the kind of drool that comes from Minions-type productions? Movies are art, and art should have the people behind it putting the best into their work that they can, kid's movie or not, so if something is bringing down that art (a time constraint for example) it should be criticized in my opinion. Plus lets face it, a lot of the people going in to see the movie were teens/adults who grew up on Mario.

Despite all this though, I genuinely enjoyed it, and my low expectations for what is an Illumination movie were pleasantly subverted. There was clearly a lot of love put into this film, and I can't wait to see if there will be a sequel. Thanks for reading!