#its weird cause he must know that it was fucked up why else would he apologise for it. but hes just pretending it never happened too

[girlleon]

I MUST BE SPOILED AND ROTTEN (CAUSE NO ONE ELSE WOULD EVER DO)

real dad!leon x fem reader

warnings: father-daughter incest. could perhaps be read as a sequel for too close for comfort. daddy kink. also more nicole dollanganger, this is a little more directly inspired by uncle. pussy smacking, d/s dynamics, established relationship. title taken from spoiled and rotten by darling violetta.

Summer is blisteringly hot. It’s been nothing but eighties and nineties and humidity. It doesn’t even have the decency to cool the hell down at night. Your box fan doesn’t do much for you, the only air conditioner is in the living room.

Which is why you’re awake, staring at the ceiling with a gnawing in your lower stomach.

You get up, clad in dad’s old t-shirt and ruffle socks, and pad down to dad’s room.

The door creaks when it opens, there’s no reprieve from the heat in his room or the hallway.

You slip silently into his room and crawl into bed with him. “Daddy?”

Leon’s up in a moment, strong arms wrapping around you. Government training left its mark all these years later. “What is it, baby?”

“Can’t sleep.” You nuzzle his neck, leaving a kiss over his pulse.

He laughs, voice ragged from sleep, and your stomach flutters as one of his arms unwinds from you and dives into your panties. “Yeah? Think I know why, baby. Want me to make it better?”

You nod, lifting your leg up a little more for him.

Quickly, he withdraws his hand and smacks your pussy hard enough to make you jolt and cry out.

“What do we say?” No change in his inflection, but that’s your daddy.

“Thank you, daddy.” You mumble, rewarded with a kiss to your jaw and his hand gently petting over your stinging clit.

“My poor baby.” Leon coos, nudging your nose with his and leaving a kiss near your mouth as he slowly fumbles with your clit. “Your fingers not doing it for you anymore?”

You shake your head. “No, daddy.” They haven’t since he got inside you that first time, bending you over the kitchen counter while dinner burned on the stove.

Yeah, it was real fun trying to shut up the fire alarm whilst you both were naked from the waist down. Doing the dishes was awful, but that’s his job.

You stiffen up when he pushes two fingers in, no burning stretch because he got you used to three in no time.

When you moan, Dad rewards you with the heel of his palm grinding against your clit. “That’s my sweet girl.” He rests his forehead against yours, then kisses you as you get close, feeding off your moans and the way your walls squeeze his fingers.

Leon withdraws his fingers and gently wipes his hand on your tummy, patting your mound gently and grinning when you giggle. “Is that better?” He wraps an arm around your waist and tugs you over, head in your neck.

“Mhm…” you nod lazily, already nodding off.

One orgasm plus dad’s weight on you equals a good ten hours of sleep.

You shift a little as you stand in front of your mom’s grave, feeling sort of ashamed in some odd way. Would mom be horrified if she was alive? If she knew her husband and kid were doing it on the daily?

Then again, you kinda ceded the kid label the second you let dad get inside you. Maybe that’s why you’re so interested in Twin Peaks, Laura Palmer was her dad’s own daughter-wife.

You lean into dad’s side unconsciously, staring at the headstone and sweating through your t-shirt in the fucking sun.

Later, as you’re cooking for the two of you, dad’s hands slip beneath your shirt, resting on your waist. “You’ve been all weird today, baby.” He sets his chin on top of your head and comes a little closer, fingers drumming on your sides.

He’s like a cat, Leon is. Never shows up when you’re actively showing attention to him and is bothered by it at best, only to turn around and come begging for it when you inevitably fuck off. You’d think he’d sleep at your feet if he could.

You sigh, stirring the noodles around the pan. “It’s complicated.”

Leon sighs too, dropping his head to ghost his mouth over your cheekbone. “So? Talk about it with me. I’ll uncomplicate it for you.”

You stir a little more, staring down at the pan and slowly sweating through your previously clean shirt. You should’ve just thrown this shit in the crockpot and called it a day. “Feel like I’m disrespecting her. Mom.”

His hands freeze; called it.

“Why?” He asks slowly, like he’s trying to interrogate you. Kinda reminds you of when he’d run a full investigation of why there were no leftover pizza slices left. If there are none left and only two people in the house, no dog, then how many graves are you spitting on?

You scoff, trying to pull away, but Leon’s got you cornered against the stove. “Come on, baby.” He goads, wrapping big fucking arms around your middle and pulling you in. “Why?”

You’d look at him as if he grew two heads if you could. “Because she’s my mom. Cause she’s your wife. You fucked her before me.”

He snorts in your ear, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “Is that jealousy I hear, baby?”

You growl in annoyance, turning off the heat. “Don’t ‘baby’ me.”

Dad smiles against your face. “You sound just like your mother.” Of course this motherfucker isn’t bothered by it. “Just like her too.” He pats your ass. “In some ways, at least.” A wet kiss on your neck.

You make an unhappy noise, aiming an elbow at his ribs. “Focus, dad, Jesus fucking Christ. You can’t just fuck me every time we have a disagreement.” It’s not really a disagreement, he thinks you’re all in your head again. Got that from mom too.

Dad freezes, then withdraws, turning you to face him with the hands on your sides. “I’m sorry. Promise I’ll be serious.” Leon takes a hand and kisses it, keeping a hold of it like a bridge between you.

You huff, only slightly mollified by him. “You don’t feel… you’re not bothered by it?”

Leon’s eyes study you for a while, brows slowly furrowing. “I love you. Lots and lots, baby. What—“ he holds your hand a little tighter. “what we have, what we do, is only a natural extension of that.”

When you’re silent again, he reels you in, his fish on a line and hook in your cheek. “The royals did that, didn’t they?”

“Yeah, and Prince Phillip was a ghastly looking beast.” You mutter, pressing your ear to his heart. Dad snorts above you.

Hear that? That beats for you. Used to beat for mom, but he got a new one just for his precious girl.

“And Nicholas the second’s son had that blood disorder because of it.” That’s probably not true, but also could be true, who knows.

Divine punishment, like in a One Hundred Years of Solitude when that kid was born with the pig tail after generations of inbreeding. The entire settlement in Venezuela got wiped from the face of the earth for that. Rocks fall, everyone dies.

Lot’s daughters raped him. His wife got turned into a pillar of salt because she looked back after they fled Sodom and the girls never got any comeuppance.

He smooths a palm over your head. “Honey, Alexandra also had the same problem. So did at least two of the daughters.”

“But we don’t know.” You look up at him and frown.

Dad pouts down at you too before kissing you. “Your mom is always in my heart.” He says once he’s pulled away, wiping a bit of his spit from the corner of your mouth. “And so are you. She’d want me to be happy.”

You hold back a snarky comment, only giving him a look. Leon shrugs and straightens up. “Is that all it was, babydoll?”

You nod after a moment and he pats you on the ass again. “Better?”

You suppose so, you’re not really sure.

You feel a little like everyone knows when they look at you. Like Girl, Interrupted when Angelina Jolie looks at Brittany Murphy’s character and tells her everyone knows her dad rapes her, but what they—we—all missed is that she likes it.

Liked. Likes. Same difference, honestly. All that matters is that she—you—liked what her dad did to her. Rape.

God, what if his coworkers found out? Incest is a felony in most states. You and him go in the clinker, and everyone knows what happens in prison showers.

There are some things better kept between family.

Your dad loves you, you know he does. You love him too, even if everyone else is weirded out about it. He needed a relic of mom’s around, and what are you if not that?

Cum is thicker than water, in that sense.

[nothing-ramblings]

i DO think laios is "autism creature" autistic. I think he's actually a great example of that. Most of the time i see the autism creature associated with special interests and hyperfixations and there's no way you could argue that's not a trait he has, it's a major plotnpoint that drives the story forward along with his other motivation. Something I also see a lot is the austism creature being used as an example of cluelessness, because of its expression. How are you gonna point to his social awkwardness, the fact that he's literally completely clueless about making people uncomfortable unless it's explicitly stated to him, and say he doesn't fit that description. I'n not sure what "tumblr" autism is supposed to mean, the person was probably talking about the more palatable traits people discuss more openly, but do you really think people aren't socially awkward in this webbed site?

i saw a rlly good post reacting to someone else's rotten take, unfortunately at the time i was too tired to read the full post and i ended up losing it, so i don't remember what all it said but basically the rotten take was calling laios creepy (in a "funny haha way" to disguise it) due to his traits, and op of the post i saw was explaining how that's fucked up. I think from what I skimmed it was very personal, comparing their own experiences to laios and honestly that might be my favorite thing about him. He doesn't just have the "palatable" traits that people are comfortable seeing. He is clueless, he had no idea someone disliked him, he even thought they were close friends, because that person never let him know when he was crossing a boundary until it was too much. Soon after this almost the opposite happens, where he doesn't believe someone else wants to be his friend, because now he's aware that he can't pick up on social cues, and he also knows he caused this person discomfort before, so why would they want to be his friend? He's "messy" in that he has a lot of traits people like to avoid when talking about autism, because it's stuff neurotypicals don't like.

He's literally that kid who people would be like "oh well if i knew he was autistic i wouldn't have treated him badly" (which is stupid, you should treat people well in general and not be an asshole then apologize because someone is actually neurodivergent or mentally ill). And guess what? He has friends who love him. They know he's awkward and clueless and has "weird" interests and they still love him. He has people who will stand up for him even after coming to the conclusion that he's "a little creepy" because they know he's a good person, and they like his honesty. Someone explicitly admits they envy his ability to be so openly himself, even after that same person tried to frame that trait as a bad thing, because they realized what they hated wasn't laios honesty but the fact that laios is able to act that way, while most people feel trapped by social rules and don't have that same freedom to be themselves. Laios can be himself not because society accepts him, in fact the first assumption when the elves learn he likes monsters is that he must be prone to evil. Because that's weird and creepy. Society does not accept him. His friends do. His sister does, she loves him and looks up to him as an adult as much as she did as a child. He has a support system. He is loved. Even people who don't necssarily love him know he could never become evil, even if they also think his special interest is a bit creepy. Because they know laios, actually know him, and they know that in his awkwardness he's still a kind person. He misses a lot of social cues, sometimes he says things that are tone deaf without realizing at all, and his friends know he means no harm. He just struggles with these things.

I think laios is a very good example of how nobody is unlovable, regardless of how awkward or clueless you might be, even if your special interest is something perceived as creepy. To me Laios is a reminder for anyone who needs to hear it that you are deserving of love too. Maybe you just beed to find a better support system, and that might take a while, but there's people who will love you the way you are, and accept you the way you are

[citrusinicake]

Day 2 :: Zombie Apocalypse

full text below

do you have any idea how fucking hard it is to be a zombie in this economy? you just go out there trying to have a bite to eat so you go up to some randos and they just start SHOOTING YOU! like straight up just SHOOTING YOU! like what the hell man? i mean i know im trying to rip your brains out and shit but cant you let a guy just fucking eat???? speaking of, this guy's brain tastes weird like im pretty sure its at least fifty percent plastic, maybe even a hundred percent i don't know. was he your boyfriend or something? does this mean you're single? wanna go out sometime? you're annoying as shit but i like that in a man, keeps you on your toes y'know? keeps you humble as well like you just wake up in bed one day and go "oh god this is the guy im dating and i don't even want to break up with him or anything what the hell's wrong with me," which i think is a pretty important thing to have-- at least for me 'cause im awesome as shit and if i don't have that sort of anchor i'll probably lke turn into god or something and i dont wanna be god. not out of self-esteem issues or anything, just out of principle 'cause i think that everyone should have a fair chance at killing me which not gonna lie is pretty easy but that's besides the point, the point is that i think anyone who wants to be god is fucking stupid and should just fucking die. like, hello??? who the hell do you think you are rying to reign above other people? are you stupid? are you dumb? hello? anyways, if you wanna know more about what i think of this i post a lot on r/atheism, im user u/waffleontopp-- wait , do i have to explain reddit to you? 'cause you seem more like a tumblrina to me, honestly reddit's pretty similar to tumblr so you won't have a lot of trouble figuring it out on your own but don't be shocked ifbyou see cock and balls on there since porn isn't banned there unlike tumblr. how's that whole thing treating you by the way? must be tough not seeing some girl's boobs every once in a while-- wait are you gay or bi? must be tough not seeing some guy's boobs every once in a while, that won't be problem if you start dating me though. haha just kidding, my chest is basically concave now after a survivor beat me repeatedly with a baseball bat so ive got like negative double D's now. oh but i do know this one guygirlthing whose boobs are out basically 24/7 who likes to hang out with me and this other guy so maybe that'll make up for it. they're not zombies and im pretty sure they didnt get infected so you don't have to worry about that but they miiiight have rabies or something im not sure to be honest so maybe watch out for that instead. if youre wondering why two non-infected humans are hanging out with a zombie then we're in the same boat, might have something to do with the possible rabies i mentioned earlier. also if they tell you that im their pet zombie that is simply not true, if anything it's the other way around, they're my pet guard dogs and they do basically anything i say even if it kills them. or at least i wish it would kill them, they're way too hardy in my opinion, i need them to die so i can eat their brains-- oh but then i'll have to do manual labor. hmm, on second thought, they can stay actually i don't wanna deal with all that. normally i dont even do my own kills nowadays, i just leave a trap or get the other two to do it for me, you guys just caught me offguard which is lowkey embarassing but trust me i am a huge, like Huge alpha sigma gamma male and would totally dominate everyone else around me. but not in a god way of course, just in a lone sigma alpha gamma wolf kinda way like those anime wolf furry drawings. you know the ones. and like im not a furry but not gonna lie they totally popped off with those

[acesofspadess]

Avocados...

a/n: its the big three...

summary: Louis ends up talking about his relationship with you and avocados

The news had been out for a few months now that you, Louis, Niall and Harry were in a committed relationship. And while it wasn't exactly news to your fans who had predicted it since you had all met during the One Direction days, people had opinions they felt had to be heard. You four already kept your personal lives to yourselves, but the occasional ‘my girlfriend’ or ‘my boyfriend’ would present itself in interviews or shows.

Louis was at LADbible for a day of interviews  and was currently doing a snack war.

“You know i feel really bad for saying this because i actually really fucking hate baked beans.” He looked up at the crew in front of him, seeing their faces. “I must be one of the only men in England- or only person in England that hates baked beans, yeah.” He brought the plate to his side listening to Becky, a crew member, try and give him the easiest way to eat it. 

“Go on, let me.” he flipped his eyesight to the other bowl. “And what have we got here? What's this?” he put down the fork before switching back to the beans. “I'll come to this in a sec shall? Right. Oh, i fucking hate beans, do you know what? For you lot, though, I will give it a go. Oh, H will never let me live this down.” He sprinkled some cheese on top, completely missing his mention of one of his significant others. “It must be fifteen years since I've had some beans.”

He listened to Becky explain what was in the bowls, apologizing for not explaining himself. “I don't know, they're just weird.” was his response to why he didn't like it. He took the smallest bite he could and chewed with a pained expression. “Oh, fucking awful, man. Oh that's gross, man.” he shook his head hoping that would diminish the taste from his mouth.

“Right, mac and cheese, fucking staple.” he moved onto the bowl of pasta after taking a drink to rid the taste of beans from his mouth. “Again ‘american’ right? Cause it looks Italian to me.” he took a hefty bite and relaxed in his chair. “Banging though. I had a lot of mac and cheese, or a lot of cheesy pasta, growing up as a kid. To be fair, for my little lad Freddie, my girlfriend - who is half Italian, makes him a lot of cheesy pasta, so… I'd have to go with that.”

“Is there anything else she makes for him? Or is that like the staple?” Becky asked out of pure curiosity.

“My fans are gonna hate me for this, she makes a lot of food from her Trinidad side and one thing we always have in the house is avocados, Freddie loves it when she makes them. She makes those and - i know it's not the right wording but like candied bananas. Those are really good. Actually-”

He took out his phone from his pocket and tapped a few buttons before the facetime ringing was heard. “I really hope she answers otherwise that would be-” he cocked his head with a laugh and watched as the call connected, your beautiful face popping up on the screen.

“Hey love.” a smile so big was plastered on his face as he saw you. “Hey Lou. I thought you were filming still?” your washed Trini accent was heard through the phone, confusion laced within. “I am,” he walked in a circle to show you and laughed. “I don't think you should be on your phone in the middle of an interview, Lou.”

“No I'm not. I wanted to ask you a question though.” The phone was now visible for the cameras to see and they could see you cock your head with questions. “Alright then.” 

“When you make avocados for us you make like this candied banana but i forgot what they're called and i don't want to keep saying ‘candy bananas’ like a wanker.”

Your laugh as well as others was heard and he just shook his head at you. “Its fried plantains Lou. and you can have them sweet or salty. Just like avos.” he was mesmerized with the way you spoke about things from your culture, “Thank you love.”

“Was that it?” you asked, adjusting your sunglasses as you walked out of the shade. “What are you doing and who are you with?” he asked, remembering the second laugh he heard. “I'm with Ni right now. We just went out to this little cafe before going back to the studio where H and Freddie are.” you showed him Niall who made a silly face at lou. “Alright love, I will call you when I'm done. Love you both.” 

Niall who was no longer in frame was heard shouting an ‘ i love you’ back and you giggled. “I love you Lou.”

“Give my love to H and Freddie will you?”

“Of course Lou.”

“Alright , alright, I'll see you later.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too.”

And as he went to hang up Niall's second ‘love you’ was briefly heard. “Right, fried plantains and ‘avos’ as my girlfriend says. The only way I eat them. Fucking avocados man.”

[glittter-vamp]

CHAPTER 6

Joe Burrow x Bisexual OC.

Warnings: Angsty. Mentions of homophobia.

Word Count: 3.1k

Driving to Joe's felt like the longest drive in the entire world for Val, despite it being only a 15 minute drive. She had no clue what she was going to say to him, her emotions were all over the place. They both fucked up and hurt one another. She knew she had to mentally and emotionally prepare for the worst. Its been two days since all of this and even though Joe immediately wanted too see Val, she just wasn't ready to face things so they decided to give some time to each other before taking to one another and gather their thoughts.

Val pulled up to the familiar house and took a deep breath before shutting the engine of her car off and getting out of it. Usually she would use her key to let herself in but after everything, she felt weird to do so, so she just rang the doorbell instead. She waited nervously at the door for a moment before the door opens revealing Joe. He looked as sleepless as she felt, in his infamous colorful sweats he always wore.

"You could of used your key." Joe gives Val a small smile.

"Would of felt weird at the moment." She awkwardly shrugs as Joe lets her in the house.

"I uh...do you want something to drink?" Joe asks, Val could tell he was nervous about the conversation that needed to take place.

"I'm fine, we should just talk about everything and rip it off like a bandaid at this point." Val shakes her head.

"I...don't even know where to start here. I fucked up badly and I know you must hate me for it." Joe shakes his head running his fingers through his hair.

"Well I wasn't innocent either here and I don't hate you." Val sighs the conversation starting already in a manner that she didn't like.

"Yeah but you wouldn't have done what you did if I wasn't such a piece of shit." Joe shakes his head with regret written all over his face.

"I didn't know about the model until the morning after Joe, I got too drunk and let Summer dance like that with me." Val admits.

"So, you didn't get with her out of spite because of what I did?" Joe asks and Valeria shakes her head no.

"I bumped into Summer at the club, after we went back to my place, I guess we made out and I passed out before anything else happened. I then woke up the next morning in bed with her... mostly naked, freaked out but Summer told me that we didn't have sex and that's when I found out about you and the model leaving the club together in Miami." Val bites her lip.

"Do you have feelings for her?" Joe asks which caught her off completely guard. She didn't think that would be the next thing to come out of his mouth.

"No! Of course not?! Joe...why would I have feelings for her when I haven't seen her in years and I'm in love with you?" Val scoffs annoyed that he would ask that.

"I'm just trying to understand what's happening to us." Joe sighs shaking his head.

"I...think we might have move on from each other." Val bites her lip not even wanting to admit that herself, but she knew Joe wouldn't make this type of move.

"No." Joe says sternly crossing his arms and Val snorts sarcastically.

"No? What do you mean no? Joe, our relationship has gone no where these past few years and then all of a sudden it just plummeted because we both cheated!? So no isn't really an option." Val scoffs not believing that Joe would straight out just say no the way he did.

"It's not that bad! We can still fix this, You didn't even sleep with Summer and I...technically didn't really sleep with Sofia..." He says making Valeria confused hearing the last part.

"What does that even mean and don't piss me off, just be honest" Val rolls her eyes at Joe.

"She left my hotel room pissed cause...I couldn't... perform." Joe says embarrassed which almost made Val laugh but she managed to keep her cool.

"So, having erectile disfunction is the only reason why you didn't fuck her? That's not making me me feel any better cause the only reason you didn't fuck her was because you had limp dick & not because you didn't want to." Val snorts shaking her head in disbelief on what she was currently hearing. She couldn't believe this conversation right now.

"I couldn't have sex with her because I was thinking of you! You know I've never had that issue with you in bed but I just couldn't stop thinking of you. I know I was making a huge mistake and my anger towards myself was driving me to do what I was intending! " Joe snaps back clearly getting angry now at Val's reaction to what he was saying.

"You were thinking of me so much & mad at yourself that you brought a famous drop dead gorgeous model back to your hotel your room to fuck her. Thank you so much, that's exactly what every girl just dreams of!" Val says sarcastically.

"Val...I'm trying here. I'm being as honest and transparent as I can. We both fucked up, and I truly believe we can still work on this, we love each other to much not to." Joe practically pleads.

"Work on what Joe? Before this whole cheating thing, we both didn't talk to each other for 10 days and before that--our relationship was basically us being each others booty call cause we live separately and hang out in public once every 4 months to keep the 'we're just friends' narrative going...what could we do to fix this at this point? We've both have been on different pages this whole time on our relationship...what is there to fix or work on?" Val says exhaustedly, she was tired of repeating herself to Joe and reminding him of how fucked yo their relationship truly was.

"So that's it, you're going to just throw all these years together away? Just like that?" Joe scoffs which annoyed Val.

"I think we owe it to ourselves to put ourselves first right now. We both need time and to figure things out." She shakes her head.

"So you want a break?" Joe sighs.

"It seems right, we need to think about what we want and come back." Val nods.

"What if we end up wanting different things? Or you simply want to break up for good and I don't?" Joe asks.

"I don't think either of us deserve to be in a relationship where either one is in it for the wrong reasons Joe." Val sniffles feeling the emotions start to her. They both look at each other with sad heartbroken looks but Joe nods in agreement.

"Do you...want your apartment key back?" He says holding his emotions in as best as he could.

"We can deal with that later unless you want yours--No. It's okay, I'm...not ready for that. I can only handle so much right now..." Joe stops her as Val reaches for his house key on her keys.

"Well if you want it back, just uh, let me know." Val nods.

"Can I still...text you from time to time? I really hated not talking to you everyday and want to at least make sure you're alive and stuff." Joe asks seeming nervous to even ask the question.

"Sure, I don't mind." Val nods as they stand there awkwardly for a moment looking at each other and seeing each other trying not to break down in this moment.

"I should...get going." Val nods knowing Joe wouldn't dare ask her to leave.

"Wait um...does this mean we're suppose to be dating other people? I just ask cause I don't want to be surprised like I was this past weekend with what I saw online." Joe says. It was a valid question so Val couldn't even be mad at it.

"If that's what you feel like you need to do...go for it." Val shrugs pretending saying those words weren't hurting her.

"I'm not planning on it." Joe says but Val doesn't buy it. At the end of the day he's a famous football player with the looks and body of a god, a break means free game. She knew Joe was going to take advantage one way or another. Val just nods not commenting on what he said and she heads for the front door, Joe following behind.

"I'm real sorry Val. I still love you & whatever you need, I'll be here." Joe sighs once she opens the door and steps out.

"Me too."

**********************************

A Few Days Later:

Val was at her store a few hours before regular hours because Kade and Elsa wanted to brainstorm some ideas with her. She got them their coffee orders & some bagels before coming in, trying to care for her employees with even the little things. They stood at the front register talking a bit about personal stuff a little bit before they started on the store conversations.

"Okay, so can we start with the idea's now?" Elsa smiles excitedly.

"Yes! Please." Val nods in agreement.

"Okay, so...I'm not trying to over step here or disrespect you at all but... I think you should use what happened in the tabloids this past weekend, to your own advantage." Elsa says confidently. Val raises an eyebrow at her wondering where she was going with this.

"Pride month is next month, two and a half weeks away exactly and though we always have a section with all of the proceeds donated to LGBTQIA+ causes on certain items...this is now officially a LGBTQIA+ owned business and you should market to the community and go all out for Pride month." Kade suggests.

"How would we get merchandise orders in time, other than what we ordered a few months ago for Pride? Two weeks isn't nearly enough time and before you'll know it the month will be over." Val shakes her head before sipping her coffee.

"I made a few calls and if you tell me by noon today...all this will be here by today, next week. Kade helped me with the budget, it's doable and you'd make record profit if you jump on that attention wave you're receiving right now. Online orders will boom!" Elsa smirks showing Val all the Pride items printed out on a few pieces of paper.

"This would also mean breaking donation records." Kade nods adding his two cents. Val looks over everything they had both gotten together, it had seemed like they had both done their homework on this in the short period they had.

"Fuck it. Might as well!" Val agrees making Kade and Elsa high five each other.

"Great! Next year we can talk designing actual pieces for pride but for now this is a great way to use something bad to your advantage and get some good out of it." Elsa smiles.

"We do however... need to be prepared for any Karen's or Ken's, I've deleted a lot of mean comments on our store instagram page." Kade reminds everyone. That part made Valeria nervous a bit, she was still getting very homophobic hate comments from people, all to which don't even follow her and never had. It was tough to see but she was blocking people like crazy and limiting comments on most posts especially on the store ones. Her group of friends were also not holding back with defending her which she appreciated. They talk a bit more about the Pride collection and how the display should now work with the extra stuff that will be ordered along with marketing strategies on social media.

The day then goes on and since Dani was out for the week Val had her hands full with restocking and cleaning around the store while Kade stayed on the register and Elsa did shipment orders in the back. Val didn't mind though, she was happy that she had something to try and keep her mind busy and off Joe, though it wasn't working like she wanted too. She hadn't talked to him since she went to his house to talk about the dumpster fire that was their relationship. She still had mixed feelings about everything, she adored Joe & cared for him in ways she couldn't even describe but they both cheated on one another. She also couldn't leave out the fact that she spent years hiding the fact that Joe was her boyfriend and him doing the same to her. As much as she loved Joe, she knew she couldn't do that for however many more years. Val gets pulled out from her thoughts when she hears Kade call for her and she turns around to see two very unexpected guests in her store at the moment.

"Hey...what are you two doing here?" Val asks awkwardly at the two men in front of her.

"Uh, just wanted to know if you've heard anything from Joe. We've been trying to reach him cause he hasn't made it to last practices and that's not really like him. Even if they're not mandatory. We decided to see if you could help us out here." Ja'Marr says.

"Yeah, we know you two are really close friends so we thought you might of heard something or known something." Tee says awkwardly making Val snort. Ja'Marr and Tee both knew about you and Joe. They were the only guys on the team other than the head coach that did so seeing Tee trying to make it not obvious was quite funny.

"I uh, I'm sorry but can't help you here boys. Maybe he's in Athens or feeling under the weather lately, I haven't talked to him in a few days myself. I know just as much as you do. " Val shrugs trying to play it as cool as she could but Ja'Marr eyes her suspiciously.

"Y'all break up?' He blurts out and Tee sucks his teeth in annoyance smacking him in the arm. They both look around and notice that thankfully no one was around to hear what he just said.

"We might be...going through some troubles but I still don't know where he is. It's been days since I've last heard of him. " Val shakes her head telling them the truth.

"Are you doing alright though? We saw... the thing on TMZ, you good?" Tee asks.

"Yeah, for the most part. But uh, I should really get back to this, I have lost to do afterwards. I hope you guys are able to track him down though, he shouldn't be ignoring you like that." Val says pushing a smile on her face.

"Yeah, I'll uh, see you later." Ja'Marr nods.

"Thanks anyway." Tee smiles.

They both say goodbye to Val and walk out of the store. Val lets out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding in and then took another deep breath getting back to her work, pushing whatever just happened out of her mind. Though she tried hard, she couldn't help but wonder what was going on with Joe. He never was the type to mope around, miss practice and ignore his teammates due to personal life troubles. Val fought her own thoughts on reaching out to him, they agreed on being on a break and giving each other space. She also thought about what if he actually just used the guys too spy on her & see how she was doing. They were acting a bit odd but she knew overall she had to just leave it alone and focus on her.

**************** It was late in the evening now and Val was making herself some dinner. Shrimp Alfredo to be exact. As she was adding the sauce to the noodles & shrimp there was a random knock on her door. She checked the time on her Apple Watch and it was too late for anyone to be delivering packages so she walked to her door checked the peep hole wondering who it could be. She was very shocked to see it was Summer. She opens the door and Summer immediately greets her with a warm smile. She was holding a bouquet of flowers. Pink Roses to be exact.

"Hey! I hope you don't mind me dropping by like this... I uh, wanted to talk to you." Summer bites her hip.

"Uh, yeah sure come in. Sorry if it smells like food, I'm making dinner at the moment." Val says letting her in.

"Smells great actually!" Summer smiles.

"Thanks, I'm making shrimp Alfredo if you want some! There's plenty, I always over make food for myself." Val nods going back to her stove and mixing it up to make sure all the sauce was spread out evenly.

"I could eat!" Summer nods.

"It'll be ready in a few." Val smiles.

"Great! Um, I wanted to come by and apologize for the way I acted the day after we went to the club & how I acted in the store that day in front of you and Joe. I wouldn't have done any of that if I knew you weren't a single woman." Summer says handing you the beautiful flowers which made you blush.

"Well, I appreciate that a lot but it's really not your fault. I fucked up and wasn't honest but these flowers are so amazing. Thank you." Val gives her a warm smile and she then smells the flowers before making room for them on her breakfast bar.

"I hope things are okay between you two now... I know he probably doesn't like me very much after that video." Summer chuckles awkwardly.

"Um, we're sort of... taking a break at the moment. He wasn't so faithful either and our relationship hasn't ever been perfect. So we're both taking time away from each other to figure things out." Val nods.

"Oh.. I'm sorry to hear that." Summer responds giving Val a reassuring smile.

"Thanks. But uh, why don't you go sit down. I'll make you a plate." Val smiles.

"I wish I would of known you were cooking, I would of brought dessert... or wine." Summer says taking a seat at the dinner table.

"I have cookies and cream ice cream in the freezer & also a bottle of white or red, choose your poison." Val respond back as she gets some plates out from the cupboard.

"Definitely the red & we can never go wrong with cookies cream." Summer smirks.

A/N: Joe and Val have a Ross Geller and Rachel Green moment happening, how do you think this is gonna go for them?

[corn-fanfiction]

Barker (Valery Legasov x Reader) pt 1

You know what? Fuck you *throws yearning and unspoken feelings at you along with graphite from an exposed reactor core*

There's something really weird abt writing a (albiet fictionalized) real historical figure bc I find the actor hot buuuuuut who cares we ball anyway. Fic under cut.

It began with you, Boris, and Valery sitting anxiously in Boris' suite. The three of you sat at perfect opposites around the two phones on the center table, watching, waiting. At first, Boris tried to lighten the mood with some quips as he was known to do, and Legasov would humor them with small smiles, but you had eyes only for the phones. You were practically chewing through cigarettes; you never smoked before you came to Pripyat. You personally thought that it was unbecoming of a scientist, and found it ironic to inhale one dangerous chemical whilst studying another. But then, you were all likely in for a worse fate than lung cancer.

After hours, Boris stalked downstairs to the bar to soothe his soul with vodka, leaving you and the professor. You bounced your leg, wiped your eyes, smoked, took your glasses off only to put them back on, and flipped through packets of notes and findings. All the while, Valery watched you try to distract yourself with a half-broken heart. Everything about Chernobyl was tragic, and it was nearly impossible to pit one tragedy against the other. Valery would never forget the look on Boris' face when he told him about their new life expectancy. It was so childlike in its unfiltered shock that it caused him physical pain. But you- you hardly flinched. Khomyuk had commented once that you were hardheaded and that's why no one could prevent you from following her into the fray, so it made sense to her that you would accept your fate. But you were younger than them, being an assistant studying under Khomyuk at the Institute. Older than some of the men working the reactor that fateful night, but still too young for what little life you'd have left.

But then, at what age is the tragedy of it all cut?

Hours after those hours later, after Boris had returned and retired to bed, Valery still waited by the phones, smoking, almost standing guard. He looked an absolute wreck and couldn't remember the last time he'd looked in a mirror. And you looked about the same. You'd fallen asleep on the other couch, and it must have been a good sleep because you didn't move once. Your hair and clothes were messed from the ultimate position you took to stay comfortable. Valery had thought at many different intervals to wake you but could not bring himself to do so.

There was something about you that fascinated him. Perhaps it was the academic in him, but you were an enigma in many ways. Deeply likeable and charming whilst keeping your true self guarded impenetrably. No one knew anything about your life except Khomyuk, and she barely knew anything worth telling. It wasn't until he saw you completely vulnerable on the couch that Valery considered himself to see you in earnest. A brave soul, like them, too young for it all, like everyone else, rushing in headfirst even though no one asked you to; only you and Khomyuk had that in common. Maybe that's why you seemed so different. Even Khomyuk was serving out of a sense of scientific duty. Maybe you were too; either way, it bothered Valery.

He took a final drag off his dying cigarette and stubbed it out, then looked at the clock on the wall above you. Three thirty-six in the morning. He removed his glasses and pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes. You all weren't going to hear from Khomyuk tonight. He'd known it hours ago, but he didn't want to leave until you did. But since he was the only one awake anymore, he decided to call it off.

Valery stood and went to where you lay on the couch. He laid a gentle hand on your shoulder to wake you, and in an instant you sat up. Even half awake, you tried to be active and alert. When you found your glasses on the coffee table you put them on and looked up at Valery.

"Khomyuk?" Was all you asked. He shook his head.

"We're not going to hear anything tonight, Comrade. I suggest you get some sleep before the committee meeting tomorrow."

You groaned and lay your head back down.

"I was sleeping."

Valery crosses to shrug on his suit jacket.

"I meant in a bed."

Except you didn't want to go back to your room because you hated being alone. Maybe that's one of the reasons you chased Khomyuk to this desolate place. You wanted to help, of course, but what was worse was sitting at the Institute without her. Unbearable. You sat up again and stretched.

"It's too quiet here."

You stand and put on your own coat. You wipe your face of any wayward drool as Valery opens the suite door for you and you both exit.

"The entire city is deserted," he said as if you didn't know. It was his nature to respond with the truth of things even if it was obvious. It saved him from the awkward dance of clever turn of phrase and hidden meanings.

"I can't sleep in quiet."

You, Boris, Valery, and Khomyuk all stayed on the same floor of the hotel, albiet at random rooms since the hotel was relatively full when you'd come to stay, and even now that Pripyat was empty as he'd said, no one bothered changing rooms.

"I don't think I could go back to sleep anyway," you continued and Valery eyed you with interest. This was the most you'd ever spoken unprompted.

"We have to be at the Kremlin at ten."

"I just need some fresh air."

Valery stopped you both in the hallway. Even at this very late hour, he was paranoid about prying eyes and keen ears.

"I'm not sure it's the best of ideas to go stalking around outside right now."

"Just around the fountain."

"By yourself? And if you encounter agents?"

"I'll invite them to walk with me."

"Be serious."

"I am." And you were. Your face hardened at his buried accusation that you were being flippant. "I can't just lie down and stare at the ceiling. At least I can exert some of the anxiety. I appreciate your concern, but I don't believe I'll be arrested for taking the night air."

But even that was a lie because you knew, as you all knew, that any of you were a hair's breadth away from intense scrutiny under the watchful eye of the KGB. While yes, you doubted arrest, to be accosted was not out of the question.

"Then do you mind if I accompany you?" He asked. He was tired, he wanted to go to sleep, but more than that he did not want you to go out there alone. It suited level headed people to be paranoid in times like these, and he'd happily double or triple that paranoia if it kept his friends safe.

You nodded mutely and changed directions for the stairs. Once outside, you lit another cigarette and offered it to Valery, who accepted. Some of the stray dogs trotted beside the two of you. They were some of the saddest parts of it all, after the unspeakable human suffering. Alone, abandoned, left to fend for themselves. Even then, months later, it was becoming painfully apparent that they were starving, dirty and mangey. Still, you offered them some comfort where you could, such as during this walk, when you bent down occasionally to scratch them behind their ears.

It was a cloudy and starless night but the streetlamps remained as they always had, offering an illuminated glow every few meters. At some point, you glanced over at Valery. You'd made notice early on how he carried himself. He always looked at the ground, always took a submissive tone in conversation, except when it came to Boris. With Boris, he challenged. You weren't sure why, but you still hardly knew them despite the long hours and close quarters.

He looked especially tired, more than usual. You hadn't considered that he took as much a toll from Khomyuk's silence as you did. There had formed a strange sort of comradery between the four of you, teetering on friendship but never truly stepping over that line. At least not around one another.

But you were as impressed with Valery as you were Boris and Khomyuk. He was called to this as Boris was, but he also faced it head on as you all did. A quiet, diminutive man, one who naturally avoided conflict, he still managed to fight for the things he knew he needed to, even if he was powerless to do so.

And when you weren't looking, Valery was glancing at you, thinking all the things he'd thought when you were asleep, only now he was considering why you didn't want to go to sleep. Surely passing the time would end in finding Khomyuk sooner, wouldn't it?

"How are you feeling? About tomorrow?" He asked after a long period of silence. You ran a hand through your hair and Valery watched.

"Useless. I hate waiting outside in that hallway."

You were referring to the Kremlin and how you weren't allowed at committee meetings. It had been a struggle enough to get Khomyuk in that room that nobody much bothered with you. You understood, you didn't take personal offense, but you still hated being in that hallway.

"I doubt it will take long. Not that I know much going in."

"What is he like?"

Valery quirks up an eyebrow at you question. "Who?"

"The Secretary General. I've heard him speak on television and the radio, but what is he like in the room?"

Again, Valery took in the surrounding area.

"I'm not sure-"

"You're right. Sorry. I shouldn't have asked."

You shook the idea from you head and pet another stray as it came up beside you.

"Can I ask you a question, Comrade?" Valery asked rather suddenly, his hoarse voice catching in the cold air. You let your silence speak an affirmative. "What brought you here? Besides knowing Khomyuk. None of the public even knew about the accident until recently and none of them know the true severity. Khomyuk knew almost immediately and that's why she came. Why did you follow?"

You slowed and Valery matched your pace. You took a drag from the half forgotten cigarette. For a brief moment, you acknowledge that your lips and his have shared purchase on the thin paper and you suddenly blush. Thankfully, for the cold, it was unnoticeable.

"I've always been like these dogs. Ever since I was little. I find someone and I follow them around. Even if someone is mean and kicks, I'll still follow until I find someone nicer. Khomyuk was nicer. I felt I had to come with her. She has another assistant and he's more than capable of keeping the department going." You take another smoke. "I didn't want to be there without her."

He watched you as you gave your confession. You compared yourself to a dog and he was having a difficult time moving past that. It brought to mind Laika from decades before. He thought suddenly about a different time and reality altogether where he was in a position to give you a nickname, and he thought Laika would be suitable. He quickly shook that thought away.

"Noble," he said finally, though he didn't fully believe it. You laughed.

"Hardly. Stupid, truly. I'll run into anything if it means..." You stopped yourself because, for the first time, you were about to divulge a part of yourself to one of your colleagues here. Not even Khomyuk knew of your deepest insecurities. "Dogs run after their owners."

Valery wanted so badly to force the dog metaphor away with reassurances, but he didn't, because he didn't know how. He wanted to place a comforting hand on you but he didn't know how you would react. He wanted to say and do a great many things, but he couldn't, so he settled for continuing the walk with you in darkness.

[brandonxdylan]

Ranking the GAY EPISODES of Beverly Hills, 90210 - Part 2

(Part 1 here)

#4.) Blind Spot (Season 4, Episode 26)

Car trouble lands Brandon and Steve stranded at a GAY COFFEEHOUSE, where, amidst all of his ridiculous gay panic, Steve clocks Mike, his fraternity president, enjoying a coffee with another guy. Back at the frat house, Mike approaches Steve, assuming that since he was also at the GAY COFFEEHOUSE, he must be gay too. Steve gives Mike the cold shoulder, showing no empathy for him whatsoever, and it’s actually really sad because Mike was so excited to relate to someone else in a similar situation, which I have to imagine would have been a rare opportunity, and I know how vulnerable and embarrassed he would have felt in that moment. Later on, Artie, another frat guy, makes, like, two incredibly dumb gay jokes about Steve, and rather than ignore them, fire back, or do literally anything other than the one thing he shouldn’t do, Steve immediately goes into self-preservation mode and deflects Artie’s homophobic ire towards Mike, the actual gay guy who’s been hiding in plain sight. Mike is understandably pissed when Steve tells him that “it just slipped out,” which isn’t really true. Latently homophobic Steve intentionally threw Mike under the bus to protect his own extremely fragile ego. Even Brandon agrees that Steve is a huge fucking dipshit for this, so you know it’s bad. Anyway, some of the frat brothers paint Mike’s bedroom door pink (such a weird fucking flex, honestly) and Mike threatens to leave the frat to avoid any further humiliation. He doesn’t, of course, because during a tribunal to decide Mike’s fate (insane that this is what it comes to, but the show doesn’t even acknowledge that), Steve saves the day by calling out Mike’s good attributes and blah blah blah, the homophobe becomes the hero. Hooray. Honestly, I kinda wish Mike had just left the frat. Why stay somewhere that is full of assholes who need to have a group fucking meeting discussing your personal life before they permit you to be in their presence? Maybe it’s just me, but I wouldn’t consider being allowed to stay somewhere like that “a win.” But whatever. Mike manages to make some good points, and his gay rage is, appropriately, very justified. I just wish it didn’t have to be tempered at the end. I wish he got to peace out, go find love somewhere better than the damn KEG house, and leave Steve feeling like a piece of shit for fucking up his life. I would have been a hell of a lot more satisfied by that. Though this episode gets bonus points for featuring the GAY COFFEEHOUSE, which is the same coffeehouse used in an iconic double date scene from the stone cold classic, A Very Brady Sequel. More bonus points for some cute Dylan stuff during the photo shoot B story, and in particular, the moment where Dylan checks out and proceeds to compliment Brandon’s boxers. This is the kind of stuff that keeps me going.

#3.) Making Amends/The Nature of Nurture (Season 8, Episodes 23-24)

While working at the free clinic, Kelly finds a baby abandoned by its teen mother (a young Jessica Alba), and though she initially wants to adopt it herself, she relents when she learns that the baby will be placed in a foster-to-adopt situation with a carefully selected couple, as opposed to going back to the mother, whom Kelly has quickly and harshly written off as evil. But things that a major turn when Kelly learns that the foster parents are (gasp!) HOMOS! This sets off her strange and highly problematic crusade to return the baby to the custody of its mother, who does actively want it back now that she too knows her baby is at risk of being raised by a couple of gays. Ultimately, teen mom’s homophobia proves excessive, and causes Kelly to recognize that maybe the baby is better off with loving parents, regardless of their sexuality, than with a homophobic teen mom who only wants it out of spite. Naturally, things wrap up neatly, the baby lands with the gays, and Kelly gets to feel good about doing the right thing despite being the source of a LOT of strife for a LOT of people. There’s also a LOT to think about in this episode, and overall, I think it’s fairly well done aside from some frustrating character stuff. While Kelly – allegedly a social work major - demonstrates next to know understanding of how social services actually work, the writers do. I already wrote a bit about this episode so I won’t get too into it, but suffice it to say it tackles some thorny issues regarding issues of child protection, fostering, and adoption pretty well, and with as much accuracy as I think can be expected from a show like this. What I find most maddening about this episode is that Kelly isn’t granted the opportunity for any substantial self-reflection or personal growth. Her homophobic beliefs are placed in stark contrast to teen mom’s more extreme views, and therefore written off as not that bad. Additionally, the out-of-nowhere explanation that she wanted the baby for herself is positioned as the real reason for her actions, and the fact that the foster parents were gay was just an easy excuse she used to justify her shitty behavior. This doesn’t really track, and I don’t buy it. I think it would have been far more interesting to have this episode tackle the issue of latent homophobia, and explore the nuances involved in addressing that. As it is, Kelly isn’t left accountable for her actions, and that’s a problem for me because that’s really the theme of this episode. It’s not really about the gay parents, it’s about other (straight) people’s feelings about them. I think they could have dug a little deeper to offer a more satisfying character arc for Kelly. It’s not problematic to have latently prejudiced beliefs. It’s human! And dealing with them is something that would have been refreshing to see in an episode that otherwise gets so much right.

#2.) A Mate for Life/Disappearing Act/Pledging My Love (Season 7, Episodes 3-5)

Kelly begins a school placement at a group home for men with AIDS, and befriends Jimmy, a young gay man who is dying of the disease. Jimmy (played by Michael Stoyanov from Blossom) copes with his illness by practicing magic tricks, engaging in some self-deprecating gallows humour, and being generally charming. At one point, Kelly gets some of Jimmy’s blood on her hands, and she panics that she might be now be infected with HIV. Following an anxiety dream in which she gets AIDS rash, Kelly gets tested and though her doctor assures her that she’s probably fine, he does give her a lecture on safe sex, reminding her that HIV isn’t just for gay men - anyone can get it, and sexual intercourse is an easy way to do so. While she’s waiting for her test results, Kelly tells Clare and Donna that she’ll move out of their beach house if she ends up testing positive, and it’s around this point that I began to realize that this is a storyline that is wasted on Kelly. First of all, she’s straight, and though, yes, anyone can contract HIV, it goes without saying that it was gay men who were disproportionately affected by it in the United States at this time. Second of all, she was “contaminated” in such a minor way. These two factors make all of this feel really low stakes. We know that there’s no way in hell Kelly tests positive. I want to be clear that I don’t think that shows like this have any inherent obligation to those who have lived through trauma or illness to deal with these issues in a way that is consistently true to life. That’s a slippery slope because not all lived experience is the same, and what might feel validating and representative to someone might feel offensive to someone else. Plus, it’s also a lot to ask of a TV show, whose primary concern should be to entertain and to compel, not present viewers with a case study on living with AIDS. However, in this case I have to admit that it does feel a little inappropriate to be putting Kelly through the ringer in the most low stakes way possible, and milking that for drama when so many gay men were really going the ringer and the stakes were much higher. Not to minimize the experience of people like Kelly who suffered the worry of a close call, but it feels like the show is really pushing it with what it’s asking us to buy into. Granted, I guess that’s why we have Jimmy - to demonstrate what being a gay man dying of AIDS in the 90s actually could have looked like. And while yes, Jimmy falls squarely into the much-maligned trope of gays who only show up to die for the sake of the straight characters’ growth, he’s probably about as good as we possibly could’ve expected to get at the time, barring the show deciding to suddenly break all kinds of barriers and introduce a main gay character living with AIDS. It was just never gonna happen, and I’m not going to hold that against the show. Unsurprisingly, Kelly tests negative, but Jimmy takes a turn for the worse. Watching him make peace with his fate as Kelly offers some misplaced naivete, desperately suggesting that what he knows to be true might not be, it’s hard not to feel something. When Kelly suggests taking a photo of the two of them, it makes sense that Kelly would want to not only preserve a memento of their friendship, but also to assure Jimmy that he is someone who will be remembered fondly. It’s a touching moment, and the weight of it is effectively conveyed. While I already explained why I think this episode kind of mishandles its subject matter in terms of the AIDS scare stuff, what it gets right is the friendship between Kelly and Jimmy. I think what could’ve made it even better, however, would have been to allow Kelly just a little more time to sit in her open-ended grief, and try to make sense of Jimmy’s death. Some frank acknowledgement of the difficulty involved in doing that might have been an appropriately cathartic cap to this story, and it would have been a uniquely heavy moment for a show that by this point was often pretty superficial.

#1.) I’m Back Because/The Following Options (Season 9, Episodes 8-9)

Steve’s mom comes to town because she’s starring in a much-hyped comeback sitcom. Rumours abound that she’s dating her co-star, and when Steve asks her about them, she neither confirms nor denies, instead opting to remind Steve that it’s no one’s business who she dates. Eventually, however, she admits to Steve that she’s not dating her co-star, nor is she dating any man. She’s actually dating a woman. And okay, this is honestly one of the most unexpected yet awesome choices that this show could have made at this point. In an era of the show full of random retcons and arbitrary character development, the fact that this one comes out of nowhere actually makes sense, considering Samantha had been deeply in the closet prior to this moment, and she’s not someone we see every week. And choosing to give a coming out storyline to a middle aged mother as opposed to some young twentysomething? That’s a bold choice! The crux of the drama here is that Steve (once again) demonstrates some very blatant homophobic feelings about his mother’s sexuality, and slings some pretty nasty remarks her way, going so far as to accuse her of adopting him in order to complete some sort of heterosexual façade for the sake of her image. It’s all pretty embarrassing for Steve, but as with the earlier episode featuring Kelly and the teen mom, there is room to allow these characters to explore their latent homophobia. That would not only offer some compelling drama, but it would be an accurate reflection of reality. And this storyline gets 75% of the way there. They just bungle the ending. Steve only starts to see the light once word of Samantha’s sexuality leaks to the media, and Samantha is fired from her new show amidst the ensuing scandal. Watching his mom go through all of this undue humiliation causes Steve to do an about face, and choose to embrace her for who she is. It’s a cute ending, but man, does it ever skip a lot of steps in terms of Steve’s growth. We don’t get to see Steve do any of the work involved in addressing his homophobia, nor do we get any indication as to what specifically would have spurred his change of heart beyond his mom’s name being dragged through the mud. There’s no suggestion of introspection or vulnerability. There’s not really even an apology. I think if this storyline had had one more episode to really flesh out Steve’s character development, and to offer a heart to heart between mother and son, it could’ve been great. But there are still great things about it. Christine Belford is really good as Samantha (seriously, Samantha is not even a character we get to know very well over the course of the series, yet I practically cheered when she told Steve she was gay, so that’s a testament to her), and for all of Steve’s shitty behaviour towards her, Samantha gets to land a few zingers of her own. And again, I appreciate that the show chose to go this route with this character. Coming out in midlife is a reality for many people, and Samantha’s celebrity adds an interesting dynamic. There are definitely things that could have been improved upon, and it perhaps bites off a little more than it can chew, but its heart is in the right place, and it’s sympathetic without being condescending or othering. And while it’s Samantha’s final appearance on the show (BOO!), we do get to meet her new girlfriend, Karen, in the aforementioned luau episode of season 10, and wow - LESBIAN LEGEND. I sure hope Samantha hung on to her.

Well, there you have it. A thorough(ish) rundown of Beverly Hills, 90210′s major(ish) storylines featuring gay themes. It’s disappointing how short-lived all of these stories were, because most of them would’ve been better served by characters whom we actually get to know outside of their relationships with members of the gang. Still, as I’ve said before, I’m used to accepting scraps when it comes to queer content. And I’m happy to look back at this show and accept that we needed baby steps like this in order to get more and better gay content on television.

I hope everyone has had a safe and happy Pride month!

[scarletiswailing347]

postinf the text for my day 2 bsweek prompt here cause its making me lag lol

do you have any idea how fucking hard it is to be a zombie in this economy? you just go out there trying to have a bite to eat so you go up to some randos and they just start SHOOTING YOU! like straight up just SHOOTING YOU! like what the hell man? i mean i know im trying to rip your brains out and shit but cant you let a guy just fucking eat???? speaking of, this guy's brain tastes weird like im pretty sure its at least fifty percent plastic, maybe even a hundred percent i don't know. was he your boyfriend or something? does this mean you're single? wanna go out sometime? you're annoying as shit but i like that in a man, keeps you on your toes y'know? keeps you humble as well like you just wake up in bed one day and go "oh god this is the guy im dating and i don't even want to break up with him or anything what the hell's wrong with me," which i think is a pretty important thing to have-- at least for me 'cause im awesome as shit and if i don't have that sort of anchor i'll probably lke turn into god or something and i dont wanna be god. not out of self-esteem issues or anything, just out of principle 'cause i think that everyone should have a fair chance at killing me which not gonna lie is pretty easy but that's besides the point, the point is that i think anyone who wants to be god is fucking stupid and should just fucking die. like, hello??? who the hell do you think you are rying to reign above other people? are you stupid? are you dumb? hello? anyways, if you wanna know more about what i think of this i post a lot on r/atheism, im user u/waffleontopp-- wait , do i have to explain reddit to you? 'cause you seem more like a tumblrina to me, honestly reddit's pretty similar to tumblr so you won't have a lot of trouble figuring it out on your own but don't be shocked ifbyou see cock and balls on there since porn isn't banned there unlike tumblr. how's that whole thing treating you by the way? must be tough not seeing some girl's boobs every once in a while-- wait are you gay or bi? must be tough not seeing some guy's boobs every once in a while, that won't be problem if you start dating me though. haha just kidding, my chest is basically concave now after a survivor beat me repeatedly with a baseball bat so ive got like negative double D's now. oh but i do know this one guygirlthing whose boobs are out basically 24/7 who likes to hang out with me and this other guy so maybe that'll make up for it. they're not zombies and im pretty sure they didnt get infected so you don't have to worry about that but they miiiight have rabies or something im not sure to be honest so maybe watch out for that instead. if youre wondering why two non-infected humans are hanging out with a zombie then we're in the same boat, might have something to do with the possible rabies i mentioned earlier. also if they tell you that im their pet zombie that is simply not true, if anything it's the other way around, they're my pet guard dogs and they do basically anything i say even if it kills them. or at least i wish it would kill them, they're way too hardy in my opinion, i need them to die so i can eat their brains-- oh but then i'll have to do manual labor. hmm, on second thought, they can stay actually i don't wanna deal with all that. normally i dont even do my own kills nowadays, i just leave a trap or get the other two to do it for me, you guys just caught me offguard which is lowkey embarassing but trust me i am a huge, like Huge alpha sigma gamma male and would totally dominate everyone else around me. but not in a god way of course, just in a lone sigma alpha gamma wolf kinda way like those anime wolf furry drawings. you know the ones. and like im not a furry but not gonna lie they totally popped off with those

[selamat-linting]

my parents aren't exactly fundamentalist people, but the day to day of living in a culture with a strong eschatological belief was enough to be traumatizing, no matter what religion it is. and im sure this is not just me, most people are just too afraid to even acknowledge how it fucks with them.

take a typical nature phenomenon, like eclipses, stars, black holes, sandstorms, weird animals, or rivers gone red from algae. this thing should have inspired curiosity right? well, in my country, all of the news articles and science videos regarding the subject is filled with people proselytizing, warning others its a sign of the apocalypse. worse when its a disaster like floods or tsunami or heatwaves or even extinction from poaching and environmental destruction. i've had people saying brazenly that climate change isn't man-made but god's punishment because the apocalypse / rapture is coming soon and we have too many LGBT people existing so of course trying to stop it would be a waste of effort, so just pray and prepare for akhirah and abuse others into falling in line.

the media does not help either. they made cheap infographic shows that are literally just about scaring people about the end of the world. a baby born with a life-threatening disability gets turn into shock fodder for tv because its born with one eye on its forehead. thats evil. do they even think of the effect it will cause for disabled people? of course they dont, in their mind theyre doing good because theyre reminding people that the apocalypse is coming soon and they should repent. i wonder, if someone from 2012 see a one-eyed child, would that kid be safe?

and in terms of personal experience, its horrifying to hear adults say, "yeah dajjal (the anti christ) will show up in your lifetime so you'll see the end of the world" and think that your parents didn't care enough to even think of the implication of bringing you to this world when its so corrupt and rotten. especially when you grow up knowing something is wrong and different with you.

and its not just that. its the end of the world, of course people would constantly talk about it in hushed tones. i've seen predictions shared in facebook or whatsapp groups, talked by kids and adults in sermons and hearsays. it turns people hostile to others with a different religion, or at best, they learn to be apathetic or detach their inherent empathy to other people because they have a different religion so theyre going to hell for eternity. so why fucking bother being tolerant or befriending them? you dont want to commit a grave sin since you wished a non-muslim to go to heaven for their good deeds right?

and when i was a kid, my friends would all have this strategy to prepare for judgement day. creating a culture where kids make up survival scenarios to prevent eternal, senseless torture is bad. and hypocritical when you keep saying god's love and care are boundless and unconditional.

my dad and every preacher i know always say to not be afraid of death, its something to look forward to, because you'll meet god, but you cant kill yourself and you must make sure even if its a natural death you live in the right way so you dont go to hell and be tortured for eternity. i agree death shouldnt be feared, but none of these people are truly unafraid of death. they shaped their entire life to make sure their death is the right one, and they force others to have belief out of a misguided sense of love.

i had an uncle who went far into this religious group, and even if the practices are completely identical to mainstream sunni islam, the man stopped providing for his wife and just pray and pray without doing anything else. believing god would simply take care of everything and even if he didn't, the apocalypse is coming soon! becoming too successful will just distract you from akhirah anyway.

its disgusting. i dont care what any religious/spiritual people on this site says. religion never gave people a sense of gratefulness or wonder or fulfillment. it turn them into incurious, selfish, frightened fucks that are too helpless to even fight for themselves and their home because the world is ending and its an inevitability so why bother? but thats the best case scenario. at worst, the eschatological sentiment turn people raging bigots abusing others so they'd convert or fall in line with cisheteropatriarchy and blame every tragedy to powerless minorities instead of the people in power.

i might have some faith left in me, but i would still advocate for state atheism. because its obvious every dominant religion will be used as a tool for terror and submission.

[lightlycareless]

OUGH CHAPTER 33,, this ones RICH theres so much here all of y/ns letters,, i wonder how hinata would feel if she actually got to read them?? not that she'd get through all of them before trying to break in there herself to get y/n out i imagine

NAOAKI,, calling y/n cute straight up now?? we're just straight into it there's no denying anything anymore. full on flirting out there-- good for them. and the GRAPE,, feeding her the grape,, im obsessed. hinata turning naoaki away bc of his resemblance to naoya-- i get why girl but also MAN you are missing out on the sweetest man in the world. n also the possibility of the zenin's getting pissy over hinata and naoaki talking to each other?? they are DERANGED for real its unbelievable.

mariya and tatsuro,,, i really do think she COULD tell hitomi i like to think she'd understand. and also backing herself into a corner w lying about to everyone i just can not imagine that ending well at ALL somewhere down the line

THE BOXES FULL OF RECORDS MY GODDD,,, naoya is going to give y/n a HEART ATTACK. its a thoughtful gesture but she is so (understandably!!) put off anything to do with him she just finds it creepy as fuck. it is so funny tho "there has to be another reason for his actions,, but what,," girl,,, hes trying to be nice for once this is not a murder attempt,,

and the idea that naoya's gonna eventually try to ask how she liked the gift oh MAN-- he's already gonna be torn up beyond belief over that last chapter ending (must be why we don't see him this time he's too busy crying) and to see her respond cold to like... what's probably the first real big thoughtful gift he's tried to get her?? devastating. obliterated.

this chapter is driving me insane and up the walls (in a good way) i am SO ready to see whats coming.. ur setting up for somethin big i know it,,,

Hello!!!! I’m glad you liked the bit of… lore I guess? I don’t know how to call it lol regarding Y/N’s letters! I only went through them briefly, in the aspect of what she must write and what not to keep a low profile, but never really showed what she was writing… and boy, was it sad.

Hinata would be very, very sad. Definitely. She’d first be upset, angry, quickly identifying that her letters are to set up a façade that everything is right, when it’s not. She’ll also be able to find some traces of Y/N being genuine whenever she speaks of the twins or her staff… perhaps. But overall, those clues end up being irrelevant to the fact that Y/N is in danger and needs to be taken out of there as soon as possible.

And her not caring for Naoaki…. Hahahahahah it made me laugh and a bit frustrated tbh, but how is she supposed to know?! yet OMG he's RIGHT THERE.

I did think on various occasions that her acting that way with him might’ve been... reckless, like it could’ve raised some red flags from him and be like “Hinata is acting weird” subsequentially, leading the clan to be further vigilant of her. However, Naoaki doesn’t know what’s up with his clan, and his priority is to help Y/N above anything else so… yeah. I wish she would’ve given him the benefit of the doubt and approached him, doing so on any other occasion I think, when she isn’t there for work and isn’t overworked either lol.

But yeah, she’s tired of all she’s been put through and couldn’t care less of engaging with other people as of right now. To Naoaki’s defense… Hinata didn’t talk to anyone else either, so there’s that 🤭

I’m still surprised the Zen’in weren’t lil bitches about it, they probably didn’t consider their interaction to be that important anyway—since their secrets are safely guarded… at least for now. Kind of. Hinata is still not out of their radar. Hmm. They’re probably thinking on how to not get involved in the crisis since they think so little of non-sorcerers lol.

Now onto Mariya…. I just love causing conflicts with her lmao. You could argue that she’s not doing anything… wrong per se, but man, lies and lack of communication can lead to some pretty terrible misunderstandings and that’s the least of the things I want happening between Y/N’s staff 😭 But essentially Mariya is afraid that speaking out loud of this situation might lead other members of the staff overhearing this, rumors begin to circulate around the house, and she loses her job 💀 It’s not that she doesn’t trust Hitomi, but she’d rather keep it hidden from everyone to avoid these risks. (also, the pain of having disappointed her is too much for her to even contemplate 😭 she cares too much for the sisters, and already gone through something like that with Y/N... no, I can't have her suffering 😭😭)

As for Naoaki… that freaking scene with the grape was like omg…………………………………………………… I wanted to go heavier on the subtle implications, but I was like no ma’am, Y/N pulled away from that one and I don’t think Naoaki would insist after seeing her reject his advancements sooooo maybe for another time 😊 This was also a way to show just how… bold the two had become after the whole Naobito/Naoya/Y/N thing went down, had this been before that, Naoaki would’ve never done something like that.

I can imagine Ranta watching the two from some undisclosed corner frantically hoping that Naoya won’t come out and see them lmao.

Finally… the mystery of whatever Naoya was shoving inside his pocket the chapter before is revealed!

Guess he was listening to what Y/N was telling him, however, for him to suddenly go out and buy them implies another motive behind them… or at least that’s what I intended to write 🤭 Naoya is trying something, to be nicer I guess, but without him taking accountability I don’t think there’s going to be any advancements soon. 😫 He’s still out there having some kind of war with Naoaki, when he should be focusing on Y/N and his marriage!!!!! Well, best wishes to him I guess lol.

Now… I won’t say much outside of that hehe because it will be expanded on the next chapter, it's a Naoya-centric one where we'll see what he was doing while this went down, as well as a bit of—

Anyways, thank you so much for tuning in for a new update!! The build up for the next chapter has me at edge, nervous… but excited too and I can’t wait to show you!!! (let the hype be appropriate) But for now, I shall take it easy, I got my birthday to enjoy (and this annoying cold out of the goddamn nowhere!!! To overcome)

Have a wonderful weekend, take care, and hope to see you soon!!!

[ess-presso]

ty for the fic rec its been added to my tbr! i have more fic recs for u as well: yeah, my boyfriend's pretty cool (but not as cool as me) by paintmegrey (another texting fic, absolutely hilarious it had me crying with laughter at 3am), and wading in waist-high water" by colgatebluemintygel (gbbo wolfstar au, absolutely hilarious and so sweet)

now for more taylor songs.... dress, champagne problems, delicate, and starlight!

as for me, im in western canada so pst timezone🙁 i couldnt possibly choose my favourite marauder cause i love them all so very much (except peter sometimes for obvious reasons but thats beside the point) BUT i am proudly a remus and regulus kinnie.🫶 they understand me like no other fr. favourite musical artist? again i cannot pick just one. i LOVE music so much (i play bass clarinet and clarinet & yes im a band kid) but some favourites will always be david bowie (ive got some of his lyrics tattooed lol), arctic monkeys, the strokes, the neighbourhood, taylor swift (ofc), lana del rey, hozier, and led zeppelin.

i would love to know ur fav artists too! and ur fav marauder (if u can pick just one)🫶

-bee

bee !! hello again :)))

OH MY GOD I FUCKING LOVE BAKE OFF. i actually trued to recreate a recipe at home with my best friend , but we ended up throwing flour all over each other and our cake was legitimately half-cooked. we ate it , got food poisoning, and stayed home from school the next day , so it was technically a win.

ANYWAY! i will absolutely be reading that fic ! and the first one too , it’s so interesting??? texting fics are my kryptonite , i will absolutely be writing one in the future.

now , for the taylor -

dress - ROSEKILLER - now i want to say wolfstar. except i don’t think they’d have ‘secret moments’ at fucking all. so that’s why i chose rosekiller. now , this is absolutely not canon based. (if we’re thinking canon-based , then i think I’d do jily ? if that makes sense , at all ?? like when they became friends & then slowly building tension , then secret dating to take the pressure off, then they finally tell everyone ahhhh. but it might also be a little jegulus solely because of the line ‘even in my worst times you could see the best in me’) now i chose rosekiller because i like the dynamic in which one of them (for doa , eg , it’s evan) has literally always been in love with the other. And the other is a clueless fucker , but then it picks up + sexual tension + suddenly they’re kissing in the back of a broom cupboard.

champagne problems - JEGULUS ( and brotherly Sirius + Regulus ) - now r u kidding , this is such a jegulus song !!!! ‘the real thing’ = lily !!!! ‘midas touch’ james being the golden boy n shit (ik the midas touch is bad but u gotta have suspension of belief okay) . now , sirius & regulus because of ‘on their knees and asks you’ sirius begging regulus to leave. begging on both knees. ‘ i never was ready so i watched you go’ him being scared to leave grimmauld place and watching sirius escape through the window.

delicate - JEGULUS - ‘my reputation’s never been worse , so you must like me for me’ regulus being like that in literally every world like ‘why you like me you weird ass fucker WHY DO YOU LIKE ME NO ONE ELSE DOES’ ‘is it chill that i said all that?’ also seems like a very james thing to be asking , yk ?? . anways , this is them in doa , especially. ‘ is it too soon to do this yet?’ james wants to date reg and reg being like ‘boy we’re just kissing fuck the fuck off’ (he’s lying dw)

starlight - JILY - this feels so them on the very first dates and every thing . they’d go dancing , and lily would know that she’s gonna marry that guy, and they would randomly start talking about the kids they’d like to have ‘ten kids & teach them how to dream’ (except they only had the one kid and never got to teach him how to dream 🥲)

fic rec fic rec for uuuu - ‘teach them how to dream by im_still_tryin_to_find_it’ . ( ft jegulus , marylily , rosekiller , little harry , reg as a kindergarten teacher , + trans regulus )

now onto chatting -

damn , pst ? i looked it up and i’m fully 8 hours ahead of you . like it’s nearly midnight there , & here i am walking to my classes.

and i get u on the peter thing. i hate him in canon , and like him in other fics where canon is disregarded. i don’t even notice if he isn’t there in some fics to be honest.

directly contrasting to u , i consider myself very much sirius ! in many ways , except i do not expect a friends-to-lovers arc anytime soon. I can swim , so not reg , but i do very much love reading ( took english lit as an alevel and everything) so a little remus may still be in me (love chocolate too)

you’re so valid for not picking out a favourite musical artist , fr .

me , it’s got to be tay tay , simply because i put my playlist on shuffle and i am never ready - is it gonna be a bop , heart breaker , making me tear up ??

oh my God a band kid ??? that’s awesome honestly kudos to u for being patient and learning those instruments i could never

david bowie is so valid of u . i absolutely adore all his songs. and oh my god , a tattoo???? that’s so fucking cool !! now i wanna know which lyric you got.

i want to get a tattoo too , but i’m going to try and convince the best friend to get one with me (he’ll agree, he always does , but he’ll scream in the chair i just know it. , just to over-exaggerate the pain and make me feel all sorry for him)

(bee atp just come and chat with me in my inbox . you don’t even need to send taylor songs anymore (u can if u want of course) & let me give u q’s to answer in ur next ask (if u drop in again which i hope u do!) what’s your zodiac sign ? favourite tv show ? favourite colour ? fave marauder girl ? AND YOU GOTTA TELL ME THE BOWIE LYRIC OKAY)

[thissacrificeisnecxesary]

The uhh. This is not for tears scene where he tells Kendall he’s gonna kill him is so interesting because he sites what Marcia said about the like Mayan child sacrifice as his reason but he also says he reads her history right and it’s just so weird cause logan in like any other point kind of denounces the idea of history or the past like he obviously refuses to talk about his own and he’s grumpy his whole birthday cause he has to go back to his hometown and whatever so it’s just very out of character in a way for him to use that as a reason for why he sacrifices Kendall and it’s also the closest we get to him saying he actually loves one of his kids by implying it but I don’t know. I mean I don’t think he’s being disingenuous in that scene because obviously if Marcia had said that before the yacht trip then surely him choosing to hold this event wherein he’s going to pick his next victim wouldn’t that mean that he didn’t want it to be Kendall so bad that he spent days trying to find any other option?

But at the same time maybe he believes Kendall would be more willing to accept his fate if logan made it seem like he cared about him like rather than just grabbing him the day Marcia and him had that conversation he presents it as though it’s an extremely difficult decision for him to make, and to compare what he’s doing to Kendall to child sacrifice to say that like. He does really care about him and love him but he has no other choice.

when in reality he absolutely has a cjoice like. im pretty sure kendalk ddint even know abijt the cruises stuff because when tom tries to talk avout it with him he seems oblivious so surely kendall could get out of it. especiallt considering logan is thw one in charge, logan must know everything and probably also oversaw the coverup. so reallt he has a choice he could take the fall for this

which would not only be taking responsibility for his actions but also hed be opening up his spot as CEO whcih he shluldnt even have anymore liek. youre fucking dying if you want the company to thrive hand it off to someone else ans fucking man up but he chooses kendall not vecause its his only choice but because he decides to sacrifice his child to save himself

which is pretty fucjing dishonorable.

so maybe. his citation of history which normally hed completely disregard is him jusr grasping at straws to rationalize a decision that otherwise wouldnt make sense. at least not for anyone else. and so if you can infer that hes lying or being disingenuous at that moment - its also as i mentioned one ofbthe only moments he even implies that he loves his kids specifically kendall so. rhats just sahsgdgdhsj its so sad what the hell. hes such a fuck thags crazy god

[jamiekb]

Listening to TMA for the first time (Part VI)

Part I II III IV V

68-80

#68 The Tale of a Field Hospital: More weird books. And yes I have no idea how the bugs/arachnids and diseases are related or even if they are but they feel weird. And that little tidbit Not-Sasha says “it makes it hard to focus” will be important later. Or it could just be that everything’s about her gives me the creeps.

#69 Thought for the Day: I do have arachnophobia, I can tell I’m so going to enjoy the final confrontation with that. So maybe Anabelle is like the main corporeal form for this thing? Like Jane Prentiss maybe? Not the thing but a powerful vessel let’s call it

#70 Book of the Dead: very creepy, love a good old story where you can’t escape your fate. Hope they never encounter it in the Archive. So maybe Gertrude was hunting down these books and trying to get rid of them? Now I think I’ll go back and see if the tunnels already existed in their entirety before the Jane Prentiss thing or if the worms like modified them, cause originally I thought the worms created them but of course now I realize that makes no sense.

#71 Underground: interesting, it’s one of those episodes where I’m left wondering if she became like a ghost or something, since she tracked dirt into the Institute. And again with weird spaces just kinda keeping people.

#72 Takeaway: as John says, more meat. It is interesting that the nephew is the one from the meat factory and the way the guy talked about religion, could it be connected to the cult maybe? And I thought the cult had been disbanded, had it and the leader never found? Or something else?

#73 Police Lights: great questions at the there John, how did they know where they were? Maybe it’s someone on their level that wanted to eliminate them? I’m sure we’ll get to tie some loose ends, but when? And apparently no more Gertrude tapes for now, hope either Daisy gives them to John or maybe Basira takes them before she quits?

#74 Fatigue: hey Michael! Good things John told me what was relevant at the end of that episode, I couldn’t really concentrate. So again he pop up. And the we have Not-Sasha being very suspicious, who’s she working with? What kind of files are disappearing from the archive and what do they with them at the end?

#75 A Long Way Down: oh hey Michael Crew, god I really need a timeline, I can’t remember what year he died, though this must be before of course. Why did he start collecting Lietners again? Was this established? Anyway so when someone disappears in the sky it’s his fault apparently

#76 The Smell of Blood: Melanie I love you, sad to see you leave (die probably). Finally John! Yes please look into Not-Sasha. I guess it’s one of those things that when you don’t see someone regularly you are more likely to notice changes. In any case I want to know what he means by “I know where to start”

#77 The Kind Mother: Oh ok so the next big threat will be changelings, finally justice for Sasha. Really creepy, in the sense that I am afraid of demencia kind of creepy. Feeling like your loosing your mind because your reality is different from everyone else's.

#78 Distant Cousin: WHAT TEH FUCK WAS THAT????? Michael??? It was actually binding it??? How??? Also why did Tim agree so suddenly? He hasn’t been trusting John for just that sudden change in attitude, will they come back because they wanted to know what John would do? Hope not, although maybe that way they’ll figure out John was take by Michael, whom I very much did not expect right know. What game is he (I’ll use he/him pronouns until told otherwise) playing??? Now John is just trapped in his dimension and will possibly now be percived as Michael's Property?

#79 Hide and Seek: please I just want to vaguely understand, AHHHHHHHH. Ok so Not-Sasha was tied to the table, by the spider webs who are its enemy. The table was moved around by its collaborators, who are the Hope and something delivery I guess (or maybe they’re involved in something else). And apparently being the Archivist is like a big deal for beings like Not-Sasha, cause it talked about it like it was a position. Also I really hope Michael let’s Martin and Tim go, he just wanted them out the way so John could be chased by Not-Sasha. And who was that at the end??? How did they get there so fast??? Aren’t they in the tunnels??? What killed Not-Sasha???

#80 The Librarian: So…. I was not expecting that. I’ll break it down cause my mind is kinda mush by this point.

• Not-Sasha has been stopped for now but its not actually dead.

• Jorgun Leitner has been living in the tunnels for years. The tunnels span quite a bit of England??? At least they can go from building to building that Robert Smith made.

• Jorgun Leitner has collected the books cause man's hubris. He employed many assistants for researching what each book does. He almost had one thousand tomes. Not all of them have his seal.

• The Entities??? can be classified by what they represent but not precisely how they manifest. So maybe not all the meat things will be One, you have to understand the themes being presented within the episode (I can only understand it like that) to see what is the same and what is just meat. So meat as death is not the same as meat as religious stand in, I think, I hope. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it.

• Elias killed Gertrude because she was gonna burn down the Archive in collaboration with Jorgun. He has now killed Jorgun, and apparently both Martin and Tim now think John killed him.

• Also the Archives is an Entity (not surprising) and is John's master i guess (somehow surprising for me, it really shouldn't (we had already established that they wouldn't be able to leave because something is not letting them))

I guess that's like my first impression and trying to make sense of it some hours after finishing episode 80. So I'm pretty excited for the series going forward. What will Martin and Tim think about John? Will they confront him about it? Will John be able to show them the evidence of Elias killing Jorgund? I also just want to see Michael again of course and more of these Entities now that we know a bit more of how they are "joined" with the books (if I understood kinda how they work), and in general just more stories.

[throbbingwish]

I wrote a long post ranting about my loneliness and longing for the basic romantic connection I have never gotten, and of course it decides to error and not post so now my whole blog seems horny and weird. Yes I may come off as a horny loser but in reality I am extremely lonely and depressed, and that stupid paragraphs long text block described all that I was feeling at that moment and in general (but of course the dingus decides to not post, anyways...). If only I was prettier then I would be seen as weird and cool instead of off putting... if I was blue eyed and pretty, with pale skin, then I would be worshipped. But because I'm not either ugly or insanely pretty, I'm seen as an invisible plain jane who if I do something slightly similar to others then I must be copying them, even if I had the idea first- even if it's barely similar at all- even if I made sure to not copy others and held myself back from doing things I had wanted to do in the past, I held it back for months or even years just because someone else did it when I was just about to. And of course I am also seen as a fucking weirdo creep. Great stuff! If I ever made people uncomfortable, or was seen as a creep, I would kill myself! And that's a large statement considering my biggest fear to exist is death. I cling to this guy that I'm not even sure I really like, just because he has a few good qualities and gave me attention. It feels like I have a crush on him, but I'm not sure. Either way it doesn't matter, he probably does not like me. He may be nice and funny, have beautiful blue eyes and dark hair, but his film taste is atrocious. Also he doesn't give a shit about me, and probably likes that pretty girl who everyone from his group has liked apparently. Of course since I dyed my hair months or maybe even years after this girl might I add that means you have to go behind my back and be like "oOh ShE dId It FiRsT" I KNOW!! You really think I would be copying a girl that I have literally never had a single conversation or even interaction with?? Plus, its a completely different shade too! It would be different if she did it the day before I dyed mine, but no, as I said it has been months maybe even a year! Just because she's prettier and you all have a crush on her doesn't mean I'm copying her! Either way, back to the topic, I'm so fucking lonely. I seek attention in every body. My crippling abandonment issues cause me to cling and then simultaneously push people away with my desperateness, my anxious attachment style stresses when people don't respond immediately or if they act slightly different, I either think people are in love with me if they interact with me once or they hate me and think I'm a creep. Maybe its all a reaction to loneliness, never having anyone (except creeps who go for any girl) like me when I have been growing up and even up to now, not even having my first relationship, watching everyone around me falling in love or having crushes on others and just sitting here wondering what's wrong with me and why can't I have that. To be cursed, someone as romantic as me never gets and probably will never get any love or affection, even on basic levels. Don't you know how painful that is? Either way... I better do that stupid thing I forgot about...

[hellfirexhoe]

breaking and entering | eddie x fem!reader

summary: established relationship, eddie thinks reader is getting bored with him. 2,026 words.

warnings: minors DNI, 18+, smut, pinv unprotected, oral, fingering, angst, insecure Eddie, fluff

“What the fuck are you talking about?!” You snapped at Eddie

“I’m merely wondering if you might have met someone while you were away?” Eddie’s ringed fingers tighten on the steering wheel as he keeps his eyes fixed on the road.

“This is fucking ridiculous, you have literally just picked me up after not seeing me for 2 weeks and you want to accuse me of cheating on you?! No, fuck this. Take me home right now.”

“Fine, sweetheart.” Eddie swerves and turns the van around, speeding back to your apartment. He hasn’t even turned the engine of before you’re hopping out and stomping to your front door. You don’t turn back, you just hear the sound of the van speeding off.

As you step inside your apartment you throw your bag down on the floor with an angry huff and your roommate Robin looks up from her movie,

“Back so soon?”

“Mhm. Do me a favor, do not let him in tonight. I don’t care what he says, I do not want to see him.” Robin salutes you as you storm off to your bedroom, making sure your window is locked. You throw yourself down on your bed and start to cry, you’d been so excited to see Eddie, those 2 weeks had been just awful without him and the smell in the t-shirt he’d given you had all but faded by the end of the first week. How could he accuse you like that? You’d been out with your family to visit your grandmother, not rollerblading in a bikini in Miami!

A few hours had passed and there had been no attempt by Eddie to see you, which bothered you, you weren’t one for playing games but Eddie doesn’t just let you leave after a fight, he checks in, makes sure you’re okay. Maybe he’s the one who found someone else while you were gone, you wonder as you get ready for bed. Robin shouts a goodnight to you through your door and you decide to grab a drink before settling in bed. As you stand in the kitchen tidying up after the chaos that is Robin making dinner you hear a clicking from the front door, the barrel in the lock shifting around. Confident you know the cause, you lean back on the counter watching the door and waiting, you glance at the clock, 12.07am, so he thinks you must be asleep.

A few clicks later and you hear the bolt retreat in the lock and the door creaks open, revealing Eddie with a screwdriver in his hand and a bobby pin in the other, he starts as he sees you,

“Shit!” You raise an eyebrow at him,

“What the fuck are you doing, Munson?”

“Breaking and entering, obviously.”

“Did I not make it clear that I didn’t want to see you today? What did you think would happen, you’d break in and I’d fall over myself to kiss you?”

“No I was uh going to come in and leave you these,” he gestured to the flowers by his feet that he’d had to lay down to be able to pick the lock. “I swear I was going to drop these off and go, I wasn’t going to do anything weird.”

“That in itself is pretty weird Eddie,” Your tone is softer this time, its hard to stay mad at him when he’s looking so apologetic and guilty in front of you. “Come here.” He picks up the flowers and places them on the coffee table as he walks over to you, taking care to shut and re-lock the door behind him.

“Shit I’m really sorry y/n, I really don’t know why I said what I did, its just I missed you so much and I know I’m not good enough for you so I was just worried you’d maybe found someone who was while you were away and then when I came to get you you seemed annoyed by me and I just- I just didn’t know what to do.” Eddie babbles almost incoherently as you wrap your arms around his waist, his head dropping to your shoulder.

“Baby, I missed you so much, I don’t think I could have even looked at anyone else while I was away. I was too busy practically inhaling your shirt. I was annoyed with you when you came to get me because you kept coming into my room to hurry me unpacking and I was trying to hide your present.” You hear a small sniffle and feel dampness on your shoulder, “Eddie, there is no one that could be better for me than you, you must know that.” You pull back to look into his eyes with sincerity. He smiles at you through teary eyes and strokes your face lovingly, leaning in to kiss you softly on your lips.

“Better?” You ask him, returning his smile as he nods and pulls you into a close hug, kissing the top of your head. You breathe him in, that familiar smell flooding your senses. Eddie’s hands run down your back, past your butt and rest behind your thighs, then he pulls you up into his arms, legs around his waist, before walking back over to your kitchen and placing you on the counter. He leans back from you for a second,

“Is this okay?” You nod pulling him back to you by his jacket that he is yet to shed, your lips crash against each other and you moan under the kiss. Eddie uses the shift of your lips to sweep his tongue over yours. You’re desperate now, pulling his jacket off and tugging at his belt, not wanting to break the kiss. Eddie pulls away from you with an apologetic smile,

“C’mon we can’t do this in the kitchen, we’ll be heard.” Eddie gestures to Robin’s bedroom door. You groan inwardly, knowing he’s right. Eddie helps you down from the counter before sweeping you up princess style to walk to your bedroom. As the door is kicked behind him you both hear music start from Robin’s room, loudly. Your face flushes realizing Robin knows Eddie’s there and what you guys are going to be doing. Eddie laughs quietly at your embarrassment,

“At least this time she won’t hear us before we even get started.” And with that he’s pulling your pajama top off and grinning as he runs his eyes over your breasts, you return the favor and help him out of his shirt, admiring the tattoos that adorn him. Your lips rejoin, both of you breathing heavy as you fall onto your bed, springs jangling beneath you. Eddie’s long fingers begin to play with your nipples, pinching and pulling gently, making you whine and rock your hips into his thigh, seeking friction. He breaks the kiss to whisper “be patient” into your ear as he starts leaving wet kisses on your neck, biting and sucking to replace marks that faded while you were apart. His hands begin to run down your stomach, over your pajama shorts, you whine again, you desperately wanted him to touch you, to make you cum and he was taking his sweet time. He laughed breathily against your neck as he found your clit through the fabric and slowly began tracing circles,

“Eddie please, take them off!” You cry out desperately at the teasing, your pleading voice pulling at his heart enough to make him agree to your request, he pulls your shorts and underwear down together, eyes widening as he notices how wet you are for him, he bites his lip and looks up at you, begging. You nod and gasp as his tongue is suddenly on you, licking your thighs, tracing a slow path to your pussy. Eddie uses his fingers to give his tongue better access to your clit and once he’s settled, gently sucking he slips a finger inside you, your wetness providing no resistance to him whatsoever.

You moan as Eddie slides another finger in and curls them up to your g-spot, pressing firmly the way he knows you love, you rock your hips and a string of curse words fall on your lips as he continues sucking and finger fucking you. He moans as he feels your thighs shaking around him, the vibrations on your clit only pushing you closer to your orgasm, you can feel it building the faster and deeper he goes, until finally the white hot pleasure is open you and your back arches, thighs tightening around his head for a second before dropping limp. Eddie grins up at you, chin soaked with your wetness.

“Did my princess enjoy that?” You nod wordlessly, trying to catch your breath as your body cools. Eddie shifts so he’s laying beside you as you recover, limbs twitching of their own accord.

“We’re not done already are we?” You manage to pant at Eddie, who smiles sweetly at you as he takes your hand and places it on his rock hard cock, you’re not sure when he removed his pants and underwear but by God are you happy he did.

“Not even close.” You wrap your hand around him, marveling at how thick he is, it always seems to surprise you that he can fit inside you without breaking you. You pump your hand up and down, watching Eddie’s face as he shuts his eyes and moans in pleasure, precum beginning to leak from him. His eyes open and he presses his mouth to yours in a passionate kiss as he shifts so his legs are between yours,

“May I?” He coos at you as he rubs the head of his cock at your entrance, enjoying the feeling of your wetness on him, enjoying the sounds you’re trying to keep quiet. You moan out, “fuck yes, Eddie” and with that he’s sliding in you, much slower than you want, it makes you want to cry out for more and faster but you know he’ll tease you more if you do.

“Fuck, I remember that you were tight but this is like the first time all over again.” Eddie grunts as he fills you up, your pussy stretching to accommodate his length and width. Once you’re full of him, he draws back slowly and then slams back into you, making you dig your nails into his arm.

“Mine, aren’t you? All. Fucking. Mine.” Every word that falls from his lips is punctuated with another hard thrust, and every thrust is met with another filthy moan from you,

“Fuck.Yes. I’m all fucking yours, no one else’s, no one else has ever had this pussy.” You pant back at him, struggling to keep your breath, struggling to hold back from screaming out. Eddie loves when you remind him that you were a virgin until he met you and his thrusts get harder and faster,

“Come on princess, why don’t you cum around the only cock you’ve ever had, if you’re a good girl I might even fill you up.” You feel your stomach fill with butterflies at the mention of him filling you up, he doesn’t like to do that often, even though you’re on the pill, so you know he’s riled up right now. His hand slips between your bodies and begins rubbing your clit, keeping pace with his thrusts until finally you cum, your pussy clenching him so tight his thrusts still for a moment, when he can move again he’s pounding into you, balls slapping against your ass and grunting like a wild beast, seeking his own release. You love it when he becomes this unhinged inside you, his teeth biting down on your neck as you feel his cock begin to twitch and fill your insides with his cum.

He stays inside you while he catches his breath, sweat dripping from his forehead onto yours, his cum and your wetness leaking out around his cock. You run your hands down his back soothingly and he pulls out slowly, dropping down beside you. You immediately place your head on his chest, listening to his erratic heartbeat as he holds you close, both of you bathing in the afterglow.

[beautifulblooms]

Can I request a Steve X byers male reader ,where the reader SA at a party and began to distance himself for everyone even his family (this can be set up if the Byers family never left Hawkins) and Everyone was worried cause every time they tried to speak to him he’ll just walk over or runaway an how he’ll be squirming in his sit every time he sit down anywhere.Joyce will be the first to find out cause she went through his room and found his diary about it ?  and he ending up inviting everyone in his home and tell them why he been acting weird and Steve comfort the reader and cuddle him until he fall asleep. (Feel free to not write this if not comfortable)

You're Not Alone Here Babe - Steve Harrington x Male!Byers!Reader

Male!Reader, he/him, this is quite honestly something I can really relate to, I as someone who's been a victim of un-consensual touches/sexual assault would like to say that anyone who has experienced this is not alone, it is sadly very common, and it is a very serious thing that happens which most people take far too lightly. On that note, this will be a hurt+comfort, and for my own sake the SA scene will be slightly glazed over, not ignoring it, just not vividly described. I hope those who relate to this can find a bit of solidarity and comfort in this, and just know that you are never alone. I kinda cut the last bit out where reader tells everyone what happened, but he does tell Steve and there’s some good fluff that happens afterwards.

CIS Women and Female Aligned people, please DNI, this story and all of my others are for non-binary, masculine aligned and male readers!

Tags: @qthetherapist , @rlmt1 , @eddieverse , @alexs-playground @mazettns, @mother-dragon-and-her-hatchlings

SEXUAL ASSAULT WARNING PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!

I shouldn’t have come here, parties aren’t my thing and I really can’t fucking handle liquor either, there should be no reason I’m at this fucking house party, damn near black out drunk with someone hanging off me.

“C’mon (y/n), I know you like me to, just lemme kiss you, a few kisses won’t kill you.” I wanted to scream, shout at her to get off of me, I didn’t want kisses from someone else, I wanted Steve. I wanted my boyfriend, why can’t he be here when I need him, not like he can kiss me right now but that’s all I want. She made her way onto her toes, trying so desperately to drag me down to kiss my lips even in my drunken state I was able to keep my back plastered to the wall and stiff as a board.

“Just lean down for me, your lips must be so soft c’mon lemme kiss youuu.” Half her words were slurred and I could only half make out what she was saying. She must’ve realized I wasn’t gonna lean down and just began to kiss my neck, all the way around, lingering on my Adam's apple and trying to pull the collar of my shirt down to keep kissing down. She just kept going, we were literally on the back porch of the house, all I wanted was to sit down and sober up before driving myself home. Now here I was stuck pressed up against a wall being kissed up and down by a girl I didn’t even know.

“If you won’t lean down for me I guess I’ll lean down a lot more for you.” Fuck. Fuck no. I glance down, the only thing I can do while stuck here in my panic attack and anger. She’s on her knees in an instant, rubbing her face on my crotch and slowly reaching out the zipper.

“No please, don’t.” All I could mutter was “no”’s and “don’t”’s begging her to stop what she was doing.

“Please? Are you asking me all pretty to keep going?” She just kept going, then the back door slammed open, thank god someone was gonna help.

“The hell do you think you’re doing to him? Get off!” STEVE! Thank fuck it was Steve that came out and not someone else. He grabbed her hands and pulled her away from me, shoving her to the ground. I was so close to passing out that I almost fell onto Steve, simply throwing my hands around his shoulders.

“Please, get me home, I can’t stay here Steve.” My words were shakier than I wanted, his hand making its way up my back and resting on the back of my neck.

“I’ll get you home, just hang on a second.” He slowly let go and moved to pick me up bridal style, allowing me to drape an arm around his shoulders and bury my face in his shoulder. He walked around the outside of the house so no one saw us. Careful to place me in the passenger seat he whispered some stuff to me but I couldn’t really hear it. Hopping in the drivers seat he turned the key in the ignition, starting up his car and the hum of the engine lulled me to sleep quickly.

The next couple weeks we’re a blur, wake up, school, eat, sleep, repeat. Over and over and over again until all the while I was slowly distancing myself from everyone. My mom, brothers, Steve, everyone at school, I just stopped talking to everyone. They all still tried to talk to me, trying so hard but I just couldn’t talk back, as much as I wanted to tell them about what happened I just couldn’t. I felt so empty for days, not able to do anything but the cycle I had built after what happened.

“Baby, please, I don’t want to force you, I just want to know what happened and how to help you.” Steve was sat in front of me on my bed, holding my hands and begging me to tell him what she did to me.

“I- I can’t Steve, it hurts and I don’t want to remember it, but it’s all I can think about.” Looking down at our hands the moment from that night was on loop, almost like photos flashing in my mind of what she was doing.

“Hey, baby, I’m not forcing you, you don’t have to tell me, I just want to help you that’s all. That’ll be easier if you tell me what’s going on in that cute little noggin of yours, okay? Tell ya what, how about we go get some ice cream, chill on the hood of my car off by lovers lake, and we just take a day for us yeah?” He always knew exactly what to say to me to cheer me up, I just nodded my head along to what he said and stood up. It was a short drive to the ice cream parlor, Steve let me get whatever I wanted, and as promised we took an even shorter drive to lovers lake and sat on the hood of his car. We didn’t even talk for a while, just admiring the lake and the sounds of nature all around us. Maybe this was the right time, a place I love, next to the man who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I took a deep breath before trying my best to formulate the words.

“She assaulted me, I-I mean she um, she wanted to make out with me but I didn’t want it so she- she um,” I had to take another shaky breath before continuing, the tears starting to blur my vision, “She just kept kissing on my neck, and down my chest and I think she was gonna…suck me off or something I really don’t want to think abo-“ Steve just grabbed me and pulled me into his arms, not even worried about me finishing the last part of what I was trying to tell him.

“I’m so sorry, I’m sorry that I wasn’t paying attention to you enough that you got pulled into that by her. I shouldn’t have brought you to that party, I don’t need a party to have fun with my boyfriend, all I need is you.” The tears that were threatening to spill did, gushing down my cheeks and drenching Steve’s button up as my hands clenched the back of it. Sobs racked my whole body and I wasn’t able to focus on anything but what Steve was whispering in my ears and his hands rubbing up and down my back. We stayed like that for a while before my tears finally stopped, but I still held onto Steve, too comfortable to let go. It still hurts, and I don’t think I’ll ever forget it, but at least I can know that I have someone who understands, someone who cares about me and will keep me safe.