#jack was right all along

[bi-octavius]

Who had ‘Tim Allen stars in arguably one of the cringiest and most poorly-written sequels to a beloved Christmas movie franchise you’ve ever had the misfortune to watch that it makes The Santa Clause 3 look like a fucking masterpiece’ on their bingo card

[slashingdisneypasta]

I was looking at your post of which Disney Princes the Weasels would be, and it got me thinking; which princesses would our gals/their S/O's would be? I hope this assessment puts a grin on your face XD and that I got your OC's right ^^

Lottie: Mulan. There was no hesitation in my mind with this one. Tough, badass, and military trained, but also loves her family to pieces. And they both got silly sidekicks too XD (Mulan has Mushu and Cricky, and Lottie has her unkles and cousins XD)

Shiny: I feel like Megera is the best candidate, even if she isn't an official disney princess. They're both sarcastic queens who have troubled histories, especially with men, and they both are soft inside ^^ and they both know how to seduce to get what they want, even if Meg hadn't been successful with Hercules in the way she expected.

Jane Doe: ... Sleeping Beauty, because they both are hiding from evil forces and don't appear so often? I'm sorry! I know Jane deserves more 😭😅 if it helps, it's also because I think they're both underrated (Sleeping Beauty was/is actually my favorite princess, despite how people feel about her and her movie). Another candidate I offer is Nala, as they are both are the half of their relationships that bring the best out of their partner, and are playful but also level-headed and focus on what's most important (Jane Doe on keeping Teddy safe, and Nala on bringing peace and order back to the pride lands)

(This moment between Nala and Simba definitely happened between Jane and Wheezy. You can't convince me otherwise XD ^^)

Poppy: I was gonna say Cinderella, but then I remembered that Psycho is Lucifer the cat, and got sad because that'd mean he'd be mean to her and make her life harder (and she would threaten him with a broom) 🥲😆 but that's fine, because I think Snow White is her best fit; they both are comparatively naive to the others, they both have messed up things either happening to them or that have happened to them. They both befriended a group of rowdy bachelors who would chase a wicked witch off a cliff for them, etc. And Poppy wishes she could sing in a well about her love life and her soulmate would appear like Snow XD (Also, something I've wanted to write is Percy and Penny watching Snow White for the first time and saying that their mother looks like a rabbit Snow White- and in turn asking dad if that makes him prince charming XD ^^)

(☝️This old lady Rena trying to seduce Poppy? I'm sorry I'll stop-)

Rena: She ain't a disney princess. I won't let those big blue eyes fool me. She's a wicked old queen. Rena and Yzma are both wicked, fabulous, crazy oldies with impeccable fashion taste. They both have weapons in equally sus and convenient(?) places. They both have very clear types (I'm with you; Yzma hired Kronk not just for a henchman), and can get people quickly on their side (Rena is more friendly than Yzma, but you saw how quickly Yzma got the palace under control... Granted, that's probably partially due to them not caring about Kuzco's 'death', but my point still stands-)

These are my votes! If I got your OC's wrong, I apologize xD but this was fun to do! ^^

I love these so much!!!

Especially Jane Doe as Nala and Rena and YZMAAAAAA absolutely perfect and I love it so so so much XDD

And hey, maybe Poppy should threaten Peycho with a broom in some of our AU's 😅😅😅😆 Even the regular timeline.

OMG!! That Percy and Penny bit is so CUTE! XD I must know how Psycho would respond to that XD I must have Smartass, Greasy or Wheezy walk by and laugh-

And Shiny as Meg <3<3<3 I feel so soft about that. Obviously that is perfect XD ^^

Thank you so so much for sharing!!

[juliareed]

Fandom: Alias Relationships: Sark/Sydney Song: Spiracle by Flower Face Content warnings: Blood, death, violence, spiders, insects, flashing lights

[hobismilitarywife]

this is what i was most afraid of :( i genuinely loved jitb, although i love on the street as well but id pick arson over it, i truly hope that he doesn’t focus on all this public perception and just does what he himself wants to :’(

[tnbc-thoughtsandheadcanons]

I wonder how much more TNBC fanon is going to become canon in the next few years

[conidiophore]

I enjoy a lot of the testosterone related libido/junk changes but there is one that is very irritating to me (and expensive). RIGHT before I started T, I got a kinda pricey toy (one of those suction type ones that an irl friend talked me into) and within a few months, i literally could not use it anymore, even though I loved it. Every time I think about pulling it out I'm reminded of this poor financial decision. Moral of the story..... Only buy vibrators or other ambiguous sex toys.....

[sheliesshattered]

I think my tastes must just vary wildly from most people's, but I feel like the last several fanfics I've read have gone on for five or six chapters too many. I'll take an open-ended happy ending over wading through 15k+ words of a dense cloud of cotton candy overly sweet denouement in which every aspect of their perfect life together is explained in excruciating detail, and pet-names and 'I love you's are exchanged every other paragraph

[ardentperfidy]

i'm going to develop a permanent tic if i have to see one more take on last night's succession episode blaming kendall's lack of morals and hurt feelings over shiv's betrayal for the rise of fascism as the way that kendall serves as a stand in for the moral vacuum at the heart of capitalism flies over their heads with a gentle whistling sound

[safyresky]

Hello, hope you don't mind me coming in so much to posit a lot of What If questions. BUT YOU CANT STOP ME EITHER WAY! You've just made a really good sandbox world to ponder in lol

But! I'm on my lunch and NEEDED to ask you: I can probably assume that you've thought about an AU where Jacqueline was the firstborn and therefore got cursed. BUT! What if it was THE TWINS that were born first? Twins -> Jack -> Jacqueline birth order.

Would the curse only work on one twin? Would it work on both? How devastating do you think it would be for Blaise to deal with two cursed twins? How MORE devastating would it be for him to watch as only one twin is cursed and they both have a violent falling out HAVING TO WATCH THE CYCLE CONTINUE YET AGAIN!?

How would Jack and Jacqueline deal with their oldest sibling (or siblings) being cursed and evil?

I know we're on the cusp of receiving more Blaise angst in the next chapters, but just a whole lot of family angst please!

Do you know, I have tango'd with the idea of reverse age order, where Fino and Fiera came first, THEN Jack and Jacqueline, and I've never actually been able to like. Figure it out in my head! I think a younger Jack and Jacqueline is an absolutely HORRIBLE thing, could you IMAGINE???? They'd be gremlins, my god, there's only a few hundred years between them instead of a thousand and an almost half and they'd be TROUBLE. ON TOPIC NOW

I've no idea which twin actually came first. I think Fiera's older? But some days she says Fino is older? But I'm like, 80% sure Fino's the baby. By a few seconds if anything. Anyway, rambles aside, lemme. Rotate this in my head all day as I slowly answer this bc now I'm thinking! Now I am THINKING.

Anyway, we love to see what ifs so please, don't apologize! SO. Let's what if! Here's how I think it would go...

I think that they would share the curse, a la the way Eda and Lilith do in The Owl House. MAYBE they're both born with it; maybe it's just the one. Regardless, they look out for one another because curse aside, that's their hecking TWIN. So somehow, in some way, whether it be one gets it and the other finds a way to use magic to split it, or they are both born with half a curse, they're sharing it.

And it's. It's rough. given that it is divided, they're not as evil as they could be, but they have some bad days, some worse days, sometimes they're both doing schemes, other times one is scheming and the other is being a voice of reason. Basically, the entire time they are cursed, they're out here supporting each other, both WITH evil schemes/shenanigans, and maybe NOT doing that particular one. I will say, though, that a cursed Fino and Fiera duo would deff be responsible for some (if not all) of the following, and more probably:

Pompeii

Every fire London has ever had, ever

Global warming/climate change

Waters receding

Summers being WAY TOO HOT

Forest fires

Most famous explosions

The Titanic, somehow, but that was an accident, for real, they mean it

They're chaotic! And they don't really have a sort of focus on any one particular like, legendary figure or anything. They're just here to ruin everything. They're trying not to, most days! Really! But it's HARD. They just can't not set the thing on fire. And when Fino starts dipping into the warlock stuff? Dear god. Shenanigans do be RAMPING UP.

Blaise is just constantly exhausted. He is too tired to even THINK of the moral consequences or how he feels or anything like that. His daily mantra is "FUCK my STUPID, FUCKING BROTHER". I think if the Twins were BOTH cursed, he'd 100% believe in the curse and just. Curse Pyros back, maybe even. Winter, meanwhile, is too warm to function. This house is too hot. But she agrees with Blaise 100%: FUCK Pyros, man. That guy SUCKS.

BUT ANYWAY, I've no idea when Jack comes around, but when he does, the Twins do tone it down a notch. they're like, look, there's a kid involved? Maybe we should like. Try to keep it cool. Winter's happy to finally have ANOTHER WINTER SPRITE in the house. Finally, she can cool off.

OH. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD PROBABLY HAPPEN??????

THE TWINS WOULD PROBABLY GROW RESENTFUL TOWARDS JACK! ESPECIALLY SINCE HE IS, AFTER ALL, JACK FROST, RIGHT? SO HE GETS THE TITLE AND MAKES A NAME FOR HIMSELF AND IS KNOWN BY ALL AND FINO AND FIERA AREN'T AND THIS DEFFS UPSETS THEM. OH MY GOD. OH NO. AND THEN JACQUELINE COMES AROUND, AND SHE IS THE BABY OF THE FAMILY, AND JACK IS LIKE, LOOK AT MY LITTLE SISTER! AND SHOWS OBVIOUS FAVOURITISM, AND OH MY GOD. THE RESENTMENT BUILDS.

Sorry this is so rambley, but like. I am thinking as we go here! This is a Live Dani Reaction! Anyway, the downside to all of these speculations is that I see NO way in which Jacqueline doesn't STILL get hurt bad, barring the obvious "Only one twin is cursed, the other isn't at fights to save their Twin, only to get hurt badly in the end in the Twin's own version of the day of darkness". AND THEN, seeing all FOUR kids be part of this infeuding fallout thing, my god. Repeating the cycle? these fuckos are out here doing it at TWO TIMES THE SPEED, APPARENTLY!

Okay this is SUCH a ramble, I am SO sorry, let me tl;dr some answers for you:

The curse could work on one twin, or both! I personally like the idea of them sharing it, bc it would frustrate both Blaise AND Pyros and that is HILARIOUS to me

Pyros being like COME ON. BE MORE EVIL and Blaise being like PLEASE. BE LESS EVIL. As the pair of them pull one way over the other and deal with this life long struggle of being cursed stony!

IF they share it, they would grow resentment when Jack gets his title, and even more resentful when Jacqueline comes along bc of favouritism from Jack, and also favouritism they'd perceive from Blinter, though Blinter wouldn't show obvious favouritism to the two younger kids.

(Jack's an ass, though. He WOULD show favouritism amongst the siblings, and not being the cursed kid wouldn't change that at all lmao)

And this would lead to a DoD tragedy with the Twins hurting Jacqueline, because in the "they share it" option, there is no way Jacqueline DOESN'T get Day of Darkness'd, FIRE edition.

Anyway (so much for a tl;dr)

IF one twin is cursed but not the other, either

A) the not-cursed Twin would find a way to share the curse, or

B) they would have a DoD equivalent fallout

And yes, Blaise would be heartbroken by this! Because the cycle, despite his best attempts, continues once again; he's been dragged back into his toxic family's shit, the history has repeated himself and he tried EVERYTHING to avoid it but couldn't do it! Devastating blow for the groupchat! It isn't his fault but of course he'd blame himself.

Jack would probably be really shitty right back to them any time they were super evil to him, whereas Jacqueline, being the lil bundle of energy and excitement and absolute sunshine she was as a kid, would ADORE her twin siblings and be ALL over them which I'm sure would get annoying to a point

She'd probably try, when she's older, to find a way to help them. Could you imagine? A travelling sorcerer Jacqueline, who picks up on the Warlock blood and learns as MUCH as she can to try and help her older siblings, bc she sees how hard it's been for them; she sees how much they've upset Jack, and she sees how much it hurts her parents and by the GODDESS, SHE IS GOING TO BREAK THIS DAMNED CYCLE OR HER NAME ISN'T JACQUELINE WINTER FROST, LEGATE TO JACK FROST, SORCERESS EXTRAORDINAIRE (she'd totally call herself a sorceress bc it sounds badasss and sorcerers would get mad at her like YOU ARE USING ALL THE MAGIC! YOU ARE A WARLOCK NOT A SORCERER! and she, of course, would reply with an I do what I WANT)

So yes, a LOT more angst on ALL fronts, especially with Blaise! But I think that Jacqueline's determination to break the cycle, her unrelenting positivity and her "idgaf that you don't think I can/should do this, I AM GOING TO DO IT" attitude really kinda moves them all!

And maybe, maybe she manages to break the curse just through sheer determination. Or maybe she runs into Lucy in her travels, who helps her break their curse. who's to say! There's so many ways it could go! But by GOD if I don't love every single one of the possibilities that I've thought of, LET ALONE the ones anyone reading this may think of along the way!

[lesbianjackkline]

dean is literally soooo funny for how he literally is a widower in s13 and ACTS like one. like he is DEVASTATED by cas’s death. then the minute jack brings him back from the empty, it’s all ‘hey, pal’. i am obsessed with the way he is fr

[fivekrystalpetals]

Pandora Hearts really took up the trope of Dead Men Tell No Tales and fucking ran with it

[septembersghost]

Who's saying Gold Rush is about that rat???? We need to have a talk bc not even at her most delusional would Taylor do that

they were convinced because of "i call you out on your contrarian shit" (we wish! we wish she would!), and the fact that she played it recently with problematty in attendance, and were like, "she's been pining for him this whole time u guys!" there is nothing in gold rush remotely adjacent to this man, gold rush sweetie i'm so sorry they'd do this to you. and everyone switching up on question...? over the past two weeks when that sample of ootw is undeniable and it aligns with every single other aspect of her relationship with h...i have to laugh. there is no way. please i'm begging for people to look at this clearly and to not keep rewriting things we understand to creepy levels. stomper the robot and i are taking the gold rush street sign and going to mars if this keeps up! 🤖

[michaelmilligan]

Adam and Claire singing along to pop girlies from the 2000's. That's it, that's the post.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

i have a Lot of thoughts and feelings in me about the reading of adam as a deeply unreliable narrator, and how it makes him and the stories/character dynamics/worldbuilding he's involved in so much more nuanced and interesting, and how it could have given us so much opportunity for messy-but-trying character growth on his part, and how instead pretty much the extent we got of any acknowledgment that his background might have fucked up his perspective A Little is the other protagonists going 'WOAAAAH he's SO cold and fucked up, mogadorians amirite' and then moving right the fuck along

[longagoitwastuesday]

It is true that everyone likes each other (Jack praising Jonathan, Quincey calling Mina "little girl", the sibling bond promised between Art and her, Van Helsing being Mina's #3 fan), but the way Mina and Jack's blooming friendship is being written seems to bring back Lucy's first letter about him even explicitly at times. In perspective, the fact that Lucy thought he was right for Mina hadn't she found Jonathan already doesn't seem to be so much about Jack being an elegible bachelor due to his professional merits or good jawline (or not just so), but mainly about how well suited they'd be for each other. Even though she hadn't known Jack for long, Lucy truly knew him and Mina pretty well and foresaw they would be a good match.

[angel---eater]

we wanna relax and have a good time for the rest of the night but that DM like sapped all of our spoons and mental energy. like we feel straight up like a husk rn i cant even think thoughts beyond what im about to type and i still have to manage all my fuckin 5e spells, on top of convoluted homebrew spells [skull emoji] [skull emoji] [skull emoji]