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#june is delulu
maegalkarven · 7 months
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So look in my mercy mirror.
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m!Dark Urge x Gortash, m!Dark Urge x Astarion.
Redeemed!Durge (but not morally), good run.
The team confronts Lord Gortash in his keep.
Karlach wants to kill the man; June has another idea.
TW: tadpoling (not graphic), June refers to Gortash solely by his name.
What are you doing?
Emperor’s voice rings in his ears - in his mind - slightly tinted with suspicion. Funny, for how much the mindflayer insists June can trust it, it doesn’t seem to trust June at all.
You said I need to gather my allies, he replies absentmindedly, hands working on taking this damn cork off and opening the bottle. Such a small thing it is, and how much it contains.
Enver was personally responsible for the creation of this new, nether-touched illithid parasite.
Enver and him; the details are hazy, but June can easily see himself fit into the narrative the lordling painted for him. He can see himself, on top of the world, with crown of Karsus in his hands, ready to conquer the entire Toriel for his father.
What a fool he was.
It’s changed now. He is a changed man.
“June?” Karlach looks uncertain and that hurts.
Hadn’t she learned by now to trust his judgment, had he not proved himself to be a good, loyal friend? The mere fact what she doubts him still is simply unacceptable.
She’ll see, June knows. Once he puts his plan in action, she will see the brilliance of it.
What use Enver’s death would be to her? It would not turn back the time, it would not give her back her heart or ten years of her life.
But this? This can turn the tide.
“It’s alright,” he smiles, but for some reason she doesn’t smile back. Damn it, did the smile come out wrong again? “Just hold him firm.”
She complies, but looks even more unsettled.
“This is...Not what I’ve expected,” Karlach admits. “You...What are you going to do with this thing?”
June smiles; this time the smile comes out right.
“I am going to fix it.”
Enver lets out a deep, throaty chuckle.
“And there I was, concerned they’ve somehow ruined you,” for a man beaten bloody and pressed down the cold tile floor he looks surprisingly content. “Worried Orin damaged your brain too much and somehow turned you into...” he trails off. “But I was a fool to fear that. No, you’re just as you’ve always been.” Another annoyingly long pause and then- “You’re going to tadpole me.”
“Yes,” June smiles.
Of course Enver of all people would understand.
He pulls the specimen out of its glass cage and holds between his fingers. Gently, ever so gently.
Enver’s eyes trail the movement.
“We worked so hard on these curious little things; you’ve worked so hard on them. It would be a shame for you to not test out your own creation, would it not?”
“June,” Wyll calls out and June doesn’t need to turn around to know his friend looks downright horrified.
Why can’t they see?
This is the right thing to do. Death is too simple, too easy. This? This will give Enver a chance to atone for his crimes. No, it will downright force him to cooperate.
And cooperation is exactly what June needs.
He is in your head, comes out an echo of a conversation long passed. Gortash, Gortash, Gortash – this damned lordling is all you can speak of these days! I doubt father approves of that, brother dear.
But June doesn’t care if father approves anymore. June doesn’t do his father’s bidding.
He is a free man, a free and a good man. And if he can change like that, who knows how Enver could?
“This is a chance,” he thinks and realizes he’s spoken aloud. “To work together. To fix the mess we’ve started. To make things right.”
“This is wrong,” Wyll argues. “You know this is wrong, June-“
“Juniper,” Enver speaks. There’s a strange glint in his eyes and it takes June some time to decipher it. There’s dread, of course, but also...Satisfaction? Like this is expected outcome. Like this aligns with Enver Gortash’s image of the world.
June frowns.
“You look entirely too pleased, my dear,” he comments lightly, crouching down to Enver’s level. The parasite dangles from his fingers, sharp jaws opening and closing in a rather rhythmical manner. As if it senses the prey nearby.
Enver manages a weak shrug, still pressed firmly down; Karlach looks distressed but her hold does not waver.
“No sense to panic over something I can’t change, is there?” True, but that does not explain the smugness. “And it’s a relief.”
“A relief?” June slowly reaches out, hand getting closer and closer to Enver’s face. Did he caress this face before? Were they that close?
The deep, annoying longing inside insists they were.
Close. Closer than Bhaal would permit, perhaps. Was he the reason for June’s little rebellion?
If so, it’s only right to repay for that.
“This thing with Selûne,” Enver frowns. “It was entirely...anticlimactic. I am glad you’re as ruthless as I recall you to be.”
June frowns right back.
“You’re delusional,” he replies. “I was ruthless once, but no more. This is mercy. I am sparing you, sparing your life. Enver, I am your savior.”
That makes the lordling look even more smug.
“Of course you are,” he smiles as if he knows something June does not. Annoying. “Now, shouldn’t you cut this ‘will he, won’t he’ business and finally-“
His voice cuts short as June drops the parasite on his face, as close to the eyes as he manages.
The creature crawls up and immediately buries itself into the depths of Enver’s skull. Clever little thing.
June watches, fascinated, as the man struggles while parasite takes a hold on him.
Then he raises an artifact.
Emperor? He calls out. Will you do the honors?
Of course.
A wave of pcionic power washes over them and Enver’s mind clears. He blinks; once, twice, brushes the uncalled tears away. Then looks up, straight at June.
“Not too bad,” comments plainly, asshole. Like June didn’t just turn his life upside down. “I assume you’ll force me to comply with your clever plans now?”
“Of course,” June thought it was rather obvious. “Now we’re going to save the day like the true heroes we are,” he smiles. “We don’t need any gods for that, we don’t need any cults. Bhaal and Bane can fight over the rubbish all they want, but we know better. We are going to have Baldur’s Gate eating from our palms. But first,” he feels his smile turn slightly malicious. “We’ll visit an old acquaintance. Halsik has everything prepared and stands at the ready.”
At that Enver perks up.
“You’re dragging me to Hell,” he comments rather cheerfully. “Again. If I didn’t know better, I’d think a trip to Hell is your idea of a date.”
June snorts, and Karlach snorts, and even Astarion, who was mostly silent through the entire encounter, snorts, though his snort is more unkind than the others'.
“No, silly,” June drags his hands up Enver’s torso until they lay placidly on his chest. Warm, he notices absentmindedly. Warm and familiar. Selûne’s Grace, am I in love with this man?
That would be...unfortunate, all things considered. But not entirely unexpected.
“We are going to break into the House of Hope,” he feels Enver stil underneath the touch. “I assume you’re more than familiar with the place, are you not?”
The lordling wets his lips, then grasps June and uses him as a leverage to stand up. Karlach almost doesn’t let him, but June waves her off and she, rather begrudgingly, lets go of the man.
There’s still a sense of unease about her, unease and...A hint of distrust? Of him, of June?  But he is fixing things, surely she knows that!
“And what exactly are you planning to get there?”
Enver is close, gods, he is so close and his breath is warm on June’s forehead and it’s hard to think- Fuck, they definitely were lovers and June is definitely not over it. Astarion is going to kill him. Or worse, going to be hurt by him, by that. Stop, stop, stop, he needs to stop-
Two things happen at once.
Enver’s hand finds its place on June’s waist and takes a sure, firm hold of it.
Astarion’s mind, gentle in a way a mind of a man intimately familiar with all the ways personal boundaries can be broken, making damn sure he is not breaking and entering into the depths of June’s mind unwelcome, brushes past him.
June lets him in.
Stop fucking fidgeting, his glorious lover complains immediately. You’re giving the bastard a leverage over yourself.
I’m sorry, June immediately blurts and does it with such a force he is sure both Karlach and Wyll heard him. He avoids thinking of Gortash being linked to them the same way now. I’m sorry, I didn’t know, or maybe I did, but didn’t want to acknowledge it, but he’s here and he is so close and I- I am sorry, I am so, so-
Do you take me for an idiot? Comes out a huff and how did Astarion manage to huff through a mental link? You might have emotional intelligence of a redcap, but I’ve been aware you two knew each other on a level what’s far beyond any niceties the moment Gortash stopped his own coronation to gape at you.
He didn’t gape at me, June argues, thought he isn’t so sure now. Was Enver gaping at him? He sure looked friendly, much friendlier than Ketheric and Orin combined. But gaping?
He stopped his coronation, Astarion repeats. To come down from his high horse and chat with you. To welcome you back. He took control over one of his steelwatchers simply to invite you to the damn thing. And you- now there’s an actual, visible huff coming from his lover.
June catches Enver watching Astarion closely; a loose, entirely self-satisfied smile on his lips, hand still on June’s waist, head leaning on his. Enver invades June’s personal space like it’s his life goal, like instilling his presence in June’s life is something he has at his top priority.
This is...flattering.
“No, the fuck, it isn’t,” Karlach says aloud, and it’s a cue for June to realize he might have been thinking too loudly. “This is disgusting is what it is, I can’t believe you would-“
“My sweet June has his strong suits and his weak ones,” Astarion speaks, giving Gortash the smile so sharp it should’ve splinted the man in half. “His awful taste in men is, admittedly, one of the later. Not me, of course,” he chuckles, but June hears the underlying self-degrading tone noneless. They should’ve made Cazador Szarr suffer more. “But other,”  vampire spawn gestures at Gortash. “Lesser men.”
“Lesser, you say?” And of fucking course Enver would take the bait. “I would-“
“Enough,” Wyll all but barks and for once they all comply. “We have bigger things to worry about but you two fighting over June’s affections,” June catches Karlach make a gagging face at that and Enver sending her a rude gesture in response.
Children, he is surrounded by literal children. Worst of all, these children are the ones saving the world with him. Ridiculous.
“Right, right,” he sends a grateful smile Wyll’s way and is relieved to see the man smile back just as warmly. At least someone is in his corner. Someone other than Astarion, but that’s given; June and Astarion are bound for life now, for as long as both of them live.
Admittedly, said life might include Astarion murdering June’s former, current – who could tell? – tyrannical lover in a cold blood. Or hot blood. In a pool of blood, definitely.
June isn’t even sure he would be very angry about it, mostly just...sad? He does seem to care for the said tyrant a lot. Oh, bother.
“We are going to break into the House of Hope,” he reminds these literal children who now are making faces at each other. If anything, seeing Karlach and Enver flip each other off would work for an evening entertainment. June will have to work on this destrusting undertone of her; talk her through it, explain things.
Karlach is a good person, she will understand. June is sure of it.
They’re doing this for the greater good.
“For what?” Enver cuts the chase off. “I assume not to make a deal with Raphael, he usually comes to his victims himself.”
“No,” June agrees. “Not for that, though he tried to strike a deal. He needs the Crown of Karsus, you see? And has something we need. But luckily, Raphael was kind enough to let us know he has it.”
“And why would we strike a deal with him,” Astarion hums. “When we can simply take what we need?”
“Exactly.”
Enver smiles.
“You are planning to steal from him.”
“No,” June leans into him almost involuntarily. He smells...good. He smells familiar. He smells like home. “We are going to steal from him. You,” a sharp nail hits Enver in the chest. The hand is immediately grabbed and held firm. “Are going with us. Care for some heist, my dear lord? Not Mephopheles’ vault, I’m afraid, but just enough for an evening entertainment.”
Enver smiles, wide and sharp and entirely wicked. An evil smile, people would call it. How he managed to convince people of the Baldurs Gate he is not villainous villain is beyond June’s comprehension. By brainwashing them, most likely.
“When let’s rob the devil,” the lordling speaks.
Then he kisses June.
And June can finally breathe.
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super-max-verstappen · 9 months
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I know Pierre is FUMING right now, his little French model ego must be so threatened lmao.
He’s doing god know what - something that does not involve being shirtless on a boat, while Charles and Esteban are both on full out Hot Boy Yacht Summer bullshit... Posting thirst traps on the gram on the same day as each other??? Them both looking incredible????? Not to mention MICK in that those pictures with Esteban!!!
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infinite-wanders · 11 months
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"Never Have I Ever ... Slept with Paxton Hall-Yoshida" is the only episode title not to have come to fruition. Season 4 being promoted as "a banging ending" / "going out with a bang"
Do what you will with this ramble.
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kangyeosaang · 11 months
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SCREAMING NEW HUTA LOG 😭😭😭😭😭😭
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stars-and-the-min · 1 month
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☆ the wrong way to hard launch (2) | OP81
summary : oscar's girlfriend is a walking pr problem for literally everyone (including herself) social media au
pairing : oscar piastri x zhou!fem!singer!oc
a/n more unserious behaviour
masterlist | last part | part 2 | next part
TWITTER
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kayla @luna_apocolyse · 42m oomf... i fear you have girlbossed too close to the sun with this one
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↳ MANIFESTED OSCALINA | LONDON N3 @12m0red4ys · 31m nothing comedic about it i was PRAYING actually
lila💚 @kasdanrights · 23m OOMF YOU SHOULD CHECK LINA'S STORY 😭😭😭 ↳ li(n)a @meliabelrose · 19m I ACTUALLY CAN'T WITH THIS UNSERIOUS WOMAN
INSTAGRAM
selinabui just posted to their story
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TWITTER
MANIFESTED OSCALINA | LONDON N3 @12m0red4ys · 3m THAT'S SUCH A DEEPCUT TWEET ADFJSDF is she stalking me or smth AND THAT FUCKASS FONT PLS LINA I BEG YOU TO USE ANOTHER FONT and she tagged his ass as well ↳ abby <3 @devilvows · 3m thanks bestie we finally got the rest of the bday shoot bc of u 🫶
pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 12m ok i see the vision, she is the vision, wtf is in the zhou genes? modelling? ↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 11m oscar, pookie, i think she's a bit out of ur league but good luck? ↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 7m i heard her sing, she's definitely out of ur league, i'm rebranding
liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 1h do you think lina saw the comments under that tweet bc if so 😭 ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 1h this four-reply run SENDS me every time
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↳ june @linafesting · 54m what was the context of this time period why are the comments so scattered? (new linami here) ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 49m i think this was around the time t*mmy got engaged and the paps were hounding lina and everyone was telling her to fight back (get a bf)
INSTAGRAM
emptybottlos
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liked by zhouguanyu24 and 9,421 others
emptybottlos THE only cousins to ever cousin tagged: selinabui and zhouguanyu24
selinabui DELETE PLS I DIDN'T NEED TO SEE THIS ↳ selinabui @ selinabui I PROMISE I'LL BE GOOD JUST PLS DELETE THIS I HATE THIS SO MUCH
zhouguanyu24 😂😂😂
selinabui
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liked by lukaszhang, oscarpiastri and 118,023 others
selinabui the desperate image reversal post
stakef1team Kick Sauber green 💚 ↳ selinabui @stakef1team absolutely not but ok bestie stay delulu
pi4str1 oscar in the likes 😭 buddy ur supposed to be getting ready for qualifying???
pastry81 is lina gonna be at the race??? ↳ mickeyko @ pastry81 no :( the whole band flew out to jakarta this morning for the asian leg of the tour
TWITTER
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↳ kay ♡ @ blackcatluna · 4h ok guys this has exited my little circle - just to clarify THIS IS A JOKE I'M NOT A KASLINA TRUTHER !!!
↳ kaslina on my mind ☁️ @kaslinatruther · 5h look at my babies 🥹
↳ oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 4h IJBOL ARIANA (kaslina) WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???
↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 4h certainties of the world: sun rising from east, kaslina resurgence every time one of them has a dating rumour ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 4h LEAVE MY TWIN GUITARS ALONE ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 4h and it's always when it's a DATING rumour, never when they break up
↳ emme @flowersforcami · 4h every baby empty bottles fan goes thru a massive kaslina phase after seeing them live i can't even blame anyone 🥸 ↳ piaa⁸¹ @papayaeightyone · 3h hi there, oscar fan, so what exactly is going on with lukas (?) and lina? ↳ emme @flowersforcami · 3h absolutely nothing, they grew up as neighbours who just have pretty spectacular tension on stage but this is them irl: youtube.com/watch?v=....
INSTAGRAM
oscarpiastri
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liked by selinabui and 76,295 others
oscarpiastri Post qualifying, pretty happy with the effort 💪
emptybottlesbar 🔥🔥🔥 ↳ oliviafufu @emptybottlesbar admin are you doing ok there?
landonorris P6 verrrry nice ↳ oscarpiastri @ landonorris P4 verrrrrrry nice :)
izzy.piastri LET'S GAURRRRRR
amelia_belrose he's on the exact opposite side of the spectrum dfjnskjd i can't believe we're getting calm bf x hyper gf
amelia_belrose mr piastri, just curiously, what exactly do you see in our lina?
pastry81 oscar went ok hard launch over, back to regularly scheduled content (papaya)
selinabui
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liked by zhouguanyu24 and 98,834 others
selinabui *sigh* kick sauber green 💚
pi4str1 SHE'S SO DEEPLY UNSERIOUS THE PAPAYA #1 VAN 😭😭😭 ↳ pastry81 @pi4str1 i love her so much she's just soooooo
zhouguanyu24 🤨 ↳ selinabui @ zhouguanyu24 爱你爱你 🫂🫂
landonorris Love where your loyalties lie #teampapaya
stakef1team We'll take it 💚💚💚
lukaszhang YO WHO'S DOG IS THAT???
courtneysong16 convinced she saw a random orange van and said “wait let me serve first”
emptybottlesbar
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liked by cameliazzz and 108,274 others
emptybottlesbar The two people currently breaking the internet (who look pretty proud of themselves) tagged: selinabui, oscarpiastri, emptybottles_official and mclaren
eb_jonno WHICH ADMIN IS THIS, LET ME SEND YOU FLOWERS OR SMTH
lukaszhang not the 'held at gunpoint' reaction pic AHAHA
cameliazzz admin... sara is that you???
aidan_ebass 👍 ↳ selinabui @aidan_ebass you remembered your login??? ↳ lottie2418 @aidan_ebass omg grandpa hi hi
✧・゚: ✧・゚:✧・゚: ✧・゚:✧・゚: ✧・゚:
taglist @ririyulife @ashy-kit
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ravolix · 9 months
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late night talking
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synopsis: though he always has been a tough nut to crack, you and scaramouche have grown to be best friends. however, on a late-night phone call with him, he finds himself drowsily enamored.
content: modern au, gn!reader, second person, romantic pining (scaramouche), (supposed) one-sided love, fluffy as shit
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In hindsight, staying up until 2AM just to talk in mumbled whispers on a school night isn’t the smartest idea. However, when it comes to you, there are no smart ideas in Scaramouche’s mind.
“Oh, and we need to check out that carnival coming sometime in June,” you were saying, extending a finger as you list off another activity.
“Mhm,” Scaramouche hummed absentmindedly. As much as your energy is infectious, he can’t deny the way his eyes start to flutter shut every now and then. Even his grip on the phone falters, the device hot from the nearly 4 hours you’ve been calling for.
“We could also visit the aquarium, the coffee shop behind the—“ You continue the list before you cut yourself off. A single glance into your screen paints a clear picture as to where Scaramouche’s mind is right now.
“Scara? You good?”
“Hm? Uh, yeah,” he murmurs, rubbing away the sleep from his eyes. However, a small yawn escapes him that’s a bit hard to miss, “Keep talking.”
To that, he hears a stifled laugh instead of a verbal response. He glances over to your portrait on his phone, taking in the way the faint artificial light hits your face. How the shadows of your room seem to frame your features so perfectly and the fact that your smile—
“Nah, I’ll stop for tonight. Wouldn’t want you to die from a lack of sleep,” you eventually reply with a chuckle. Scaramouche can hear (and barely see) you flip over in your bed, pulling the covers over your body.
In this new angle, he gets to see a new perspective of your face. A part of him wishes he could just reach out and tuck away that stray piece of hair laying on your forehead. Perhaps if he was there with you, you wouldn’t feel the need to go under the covers for warmth.
Instead, however, he just nods.
“Fair. Guess I’ll catch you tomorrow,” he replies softly, a wind-down from the previous energy the call carried.
“Yep, see you,” your lips curve into a gentle smile.
Scaramouche only replies with a cough, trying to cover up the faint blush as he finds himself getting flustered over your pixely face.
“Sweet dreams, Scara.”
Before he can open his mouth to reply, you already hung up. Though a part of him wishes the call lasted a bit longer, the other part is glad you didn’t have to hear whatever was about to slip from his mouth.
After a few seconds, he sighs and places his phone on his bedside table. He then proceeds to bury his face into the silky case of his pillow as his tired fists come to gently slam against the mattress. Nothing much is heard from him except for a few unintelligible mumbles.
Eventually, Scaramouche flips over onto his back as he stares up at the ceiling. Faint glow-in-the-dark stars from his childhood seem to stare back at him. He lets his eyes flutter shut as a small chuckle escapes his lips.
“Who needs dreams if you’re the sweetest thing I have?”
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notes: just another random babble :)) im not the best at writing dialogue but it’s better to do it once in a while
i really like writing scara as this silly little loser rather than a sadistic asshole (atleast in modern aus) (a bit delulu)
ah also i kind of forgot about the harry styles song up until right before posting this, but let’s say it’s loosely inspired 👍
taglist:
@aphroditesswan
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fairlyang · 3 months
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El perdedor 🕷️
finding your ex at the club
w/c: 2.7K
pairing: ex!miguel x latina!reader
tags: rebound, dancing, a lil gay if you squint, shaking ass, jealousy, delulu ex, slowly folding
notes: i posted this shit back in june and when I was reposting everything I really didn’t wanna repost this one but I think there’s more latinas here entonces para ustedes mis amores <3 (only thing I changed from this was the pov bc it was so bad LMAO but it was my 4th fic of mig)
You roll your eyes at your new fling's friend after making a nasty joke of a girl who just walked past you. He takes notice and tells you to stop being so uptight. "Then stop being such a dick." You say and he snorts.
You roll your eyes and look away from him. Having to deal with this bullshit just for some mediocre dick with alright dirty talk? Probably one of my worst decisions to date.
Next to breaking up with Miguel.... But your ego will never let you admit that you miss him and his won't either, clearly since it's been two months. But you couldn't wait around to find out so you’ve been fooling around a bit. Nothing serious since you’re not in the right headspace for that and Daniel knows that. Just here for the drinks, alright sex, and decent conversations.
You’re in line to get into a club but as it's almost midnight it's the hot hour of everyone wanting to get wasted. "Why can't we go to another club? This line is so fucking long-" a girl from fling's friend group asks.
"This is the only one with incredible strippe-"
You groan and shake your head. "Don't you have a girlfriend?"
"It's none of your business actua-"
"You two didn't break up though, Y/n kinda has a point....." Daniel speaks up and he pretends to cry.
"Whah whah- so what? She thinks she can still be friends with her ex while being with me? Then I'll just have my own fun." He says with a smirk and you have the most disgusted look on your face ever.
The other girl does as well and just shakes her head. The lines finally starts moving and at a fast pace actually until it stops with the people in front of you showing the bouncers their ids. You get your out from your bra making the annoying asshole smirk. "Fuck off."
He holds up his hands in defense and Daniel moves to stand next to you. "Soon as we're in there he's gonna be out of our hands alright?" He whispers and you just nod.
The people in front of you finally show them and you step forward. You give it to the bouncer to the left and he looks at it and feels it for a few seconds before handing it back and nods. You move forward, putting it in your phone case, and wait for Daniel to get his checked and you step into the first set of doors. You both wait for the other two and you can instantly smell all the sweat and alcohol. Amazing.
They both finally join you and walk ahead of you, not caring you guys waited. You give Daniel a look and he shrugs. Asshole goes straight to where there are indeed strippers and home girl was nowhere to be seen. That was fast.
"So drinks?" Daniel asks and you nod following him to the main bar.
You walk through people just standing around by booths and table and other who are just making out. You make it to the bar and Daniel says something you can't hear because of the loud techno with pop music. The bartender takes out two shot glasses and fills them to the very top. Daniel picks them both up and gives you yours.
You raise it up and bring it to your mouth and swallow it fast. You gag a little and he laughs. "You fine with just one?"
"For now yeah I think." You say and put the glass back on the counter nodding to the bartender.
You turn back around and watch as Daniel is looking over at a booth almost near the entrance. How can he even see that far.....
You squint but know you have fucked up eye sight so you just stop. "Oh shit- wait here I think I just recognized someone-" he says and starts walking away.
You blink and call out after him, "you're leaving me like that??"
"I'll make it up to you." He turns to look at you then walks away making you roll your eyes. The audacity.
You let out a sigh and shake your head. Dickhead. You turn back to the bar and take a seat. "Another shot please and can you put it on my friend's tab?" You ask with a slight smirk.
He laughs and nods taking out a clean shot glass and once again filling it to the brim. You smile and grab it, then swallow it faster than the first. You don't gag too bad this time and put the glass down. Then your head snaps to the speakers within hearing one singular second of Gasolina by daddy yankee.
You make your way to the dance floor and move in towards the middle where there's a group of girls just dancing with each other. You smile and just dance next to them when one of them grabs your hand and dances with you. You laugh and move your hips to the beat while singing the lyrics with the other girls. All the girls are dancing with each other and taking turns with each other.
You ended up swapping places with another girl and she had the brightest smile while shaking her ass a bit on you. Which was fine because who doesn't like dancing and shaking ass with the girlies to this song?
Zúmbale mambo pa' que mi gata prenda lo' motore'
Zúmbale mambo pa' que mi gata prenda lo' motore'
Zúmbale mambo pa' que mi gata prenda lo' motore'
Que se preparen que lo que viene es pa' que le den (duro)
The first girl you were with found you again and stands in front of you and grinds against you to the beat. You held her hips and she grabs your other hand to hold it. So cute.
You switch off with her, dancing on her then shaking a bit of ass on her, and she hypes you up, screaming and smacking it playfully. You turn around and start laughing which makes her do so as well. "Girl give me your number immediately!!" She screams and you nod as she passes me her phone.
"I love making new girlfriends cuando sale gasolina. Todas las hermosas salen y se tan divertido!" She screams and you nod. (I love making new girlfriends when gasolina plays. All the gorgeous girls come out and it's so much fun!)
"Rally up all the baddies with just one song." You scream back and she laughs.
"I'm Y/n by the way!"
"I'm Rosa! I gotta go but we should do this again!! You're an incredible dancing partner!" She exclaims and you grin.
"Anytime!!" You say and wave goodbye as she leaves.
You dance to the beat of the chorus of Perra by tokischa with the leftover girlies as you all scream the lyrics and one girl even got on all floors and crawled her way to her friend. You all screamed and you just burst out laughing until your stomach starts hurting and you have to stop to breathe.
Then you hear El Perdedor by Maluma start playing and you get excited because you love singing it.
Baby (¿Pa' qué me estás llamando?)
"Pa que me estás llamando???" You scream with the two other girls that were left from the little circle.
Dime si es verdad que él te trae loca
(Y ¿ahora es que te importa?) ¿Ah si?
You sing the lyrics but notice the girls already left so there's no more circle or a triangle and now you’re just surrounded by couples. Unfortunate.
Aún no lo creo, que en tan poco tiempo y ya besas otra boca
(De mala) ¿Qué?
You listen to the lyrics and widen your eyes. Seems a little too close to home....
Dime cuál fue mi error
Si mi único delito solo fue amarte
Hoy soy el perdedor (Bebé, no)
Él me ha robado el truco para enamorarte
You feel a pit in your stomach suddenly unsure of what it is until you feel a person's presence standing behind you. Their hands grabs your hips bringing you closer to them and you widen your eyes.
Y dime que me amas, aunque sea mentira
No puedo negarte, los celos me están matando
They move your hair from the left side of your face and sing the lyrics to you. oh shit-
Y dile en su cara que aún por mí suspiras
Me parte el alma no volver a verte
"Al fin me toca verte...." He whispers directly in your ear leaving shivers down your spine and arms. (Finally I get to see you)
Y dime que me amas, aunque sea mentira
Sabes que no hay nadie como yo
Y dile en su cara que aún por mí suspiras
No te engañes, no me olvidarás
"I know for you it isn't a lie... and have you told your new man you haven't forgotten about me?" He whispers as those lines play, leaving the lightest kisses below your ear. You pull away slightly pushing him off and turn to look at him.
Está claro que tú mereces alguien mejor
"And you're gonna tell me I deserve better than you?" You ask with a scoff staring right at Miguel O'hara's eyes making him smirk.
No sé en qué fallé, pero no hay otro como yo
Oye ma', dame otra oportunidad
Bien sabes no soy así, solo tú me haces rogar
Mirándome al espejo y peleando con mi ego
Si entre más me alejo, más te pienso
"There's no better than me sweetheart. But you really are the only one I'll ever beg for..." he says his hands slipping to your waist and bringing you as close to him as as possible.
"And I have been fighting my ego trying not to contact you...." he says and you can't believe he's just repeating the lyrics for you and them making complete sense to your situation.
Dime cuál fue mi error
Si mi único delito solo fue amarte
Hoy soy el perdedor
Él me ha robado el truco para enamorarte
He whispers the lyrics softly to you then gets kind of annoyed at the last line making you snort.
Y dime que me amas, aunque sea mentira
No puedo negarte, los celos me están matando
Y dile en su cara que aún por mí suspiras
Me parte el alma no volver a verte
"You have no fucking idea how badly the jealousy has been eating me alive..." he growls and you bite your lip.
"So did you tell him about me?" He asks with a smirk on his face.
Y dime que me amas, aunque sea mentira
Sabes que no hay nadie como yo
Y dile en su cara que aún por mí suspiras
No te engañes, no me olvidarás
"Don't be st-stupid-" you say, not even able to keep a straight face or manage to keep the eye contact.
He scoffs and lifts your chin with two fingers to look up at him. Jesus.
Y si te da la gana de volver a verme
Estaré disponible para contestarte
Y yo sé que, por tu parte, no sientes rencores
Quizás mañana vuelvas pa' que te enamore (More')
"I'm actually not sure if you regret it.. but I know deep down you do." He says and you bite your tongue.
"Y envés de mañana," he whispers and moves his face to leave wet kisses on your neck, "tal ves quieres que te enamores de mi otra ves, ahorita mismo." (And instead of tomorrow, maybe you want to fall in love with me again, right now.)
Cuando tomábamos, lo hacíamos
Fumábamos, y reíamos
Éramos dos locos sin saber pa' dónde íbamos
Pero son cosas del destino
Al pasar el tiempo, tú cogiste tu camino
"E-estas loco- no ha- no hables tonterías." You say as your breathing is suddenly all over the place. (Y-you're crazy- don't ta- don't talk nonsense)
He comes up and nibbles on your ear, his hands dangerously near your ass while yours are on his chest. 
Está claro que tú mereces alguien mejor
No sé en qué fallé, pero no hay otro como yo
Dime cuál fue mi error
Si mi único delito solo fue amarte
"Pues porque te pones tan nerviosa?" He whispers and you sigh. (Then why are you getting so nervous)
You feel like you can't even move but you’re not going to admit shit- you can't break that fucking easily.
Hoy soy el perdedor
Él me ha robado el truco para enamorarte
"Porque creo... que yo voy a ser el ganador. Ahora dime en donde está tu otro galán?" He pulls away and looks deep into your eyes. Fuck. (Because I think... that I'm going to be the winner. Now tell me where's your other hunk?)
"Just abandoned my ass- wait- MIGUEL- did you do something to him?!?" You mutter.
Y dime que me amas, aunque sea mentira
No puedo negarte, los celos me están matando
Y dile en su cara que aún por mí suspiras
Me parte el alma no volver a verte
"I'll answer your question if you tell me you love me." He says with a smirk making you groan.
"Miguel I'm not doing this shit with you right now-" you say trying to wiggle out of his grasp fast which you successfully do now trying your best to leave the dance floor.
But he catches up to you, grabs your arm and brings you close to him. Your back against his chest, your ass on his crotch. You bite your lip and shake your head. "Por que apenas vienes a encontrarme?" You look up at him and ask. (Why are you barely coming to find me?)
Y dime que me amas, aunque sea mentira
Sabes que no hay nadie como yo
Y dile en su cara que aún por mí suspiras
Que por mí suspiras, que no, que no, que no
Yo', baby
(Solo fue amarte) Y te hablo claro
He shifts uncomfortably for a second and looks around. "I haven't even been in our universe since the break up love...."
You turn to face him and widen your eyes. "Did something happen?" I ask with a worried expression.
¿Sabes qué?
Él no te hace el amor
No te trata bien
Y que yo fui el primero en tu vida
"I'm not telling you any more. I-I just didn't want to put your life at risk- and well I still don't." He says but it doesn't stop your heart beat from calming down.
"Y-you- can we leave?" You ask and he quickly nods. You hold onto his arm while you try to move past the crowds of people and to the exit.
You walk past the booths by the entrance and Danny was actually there- taking shots off some girl's tits. You roll your eyes and make a mental note to block his ass on everything. "So you really didn't do shit to him...." you mutter and he scoffs.
"You actually thought I did?" He responds sarcastically.
"You're insufferable." You say shaking your head trying to hide your smile.
You walk out the doors and you sigh. He takes the lead in walking you a couple blocks before he pulls up to an alleyway and you furrow your brows. He then makes sure no one is near and pushed a button on his watch so his suit can appear onto his skin. "Really? Instead of an Uber?" You tease and he rolls his eyes.
"Es más fácil." He says and motioning for you to step forward. (It’s easier)
"Claro! Lo que digas codo." You say laughing and holding onto him. (Of course! Whatever you say cheap-stake)
"Jump."
You do so and he suddenly has your legs wrapped around his waist by the side. "You know the drill cariño."
You nod and wrap your arms tightly around his neck. He swings you out and we're high up in the city. All the lights made the city look even prettier especially from up here. Though you never got use to it, the first few times you threw up after. You laugh at the memory and lean your head against his shoulder. You hear him sigh and you do so as well. You’ve missed him.
—————————
translations (lazy to drag em up)
Baby! (Why are you calling me?)
Tell me if it's true that he makes you crazy
(And what's important to you?)
I still can't believe that after such little time you're already kissing someone else
What the hell?
Tell me where I messed up
If my only error was loving you
Today I'm the loser
They've stolen my trick to make you fall in love
And tell me that you love me even if it's a lie
I can't deny you, this jealousy is killing me
And tell it to his face that you still breathe for me
My heart is splitting in two and I won't ever see you again
and tell me that you love me even if it's a lie
You can already see there is no one like me
and tell it to his face that you still breathe for me
Don't trick yourself, you know you won't ever forget me
It's clear that you deserve someone better
I don't know where I messed up but there is no one like me
Listen babe, give me another opportunity you know I'm not like this...you're the only one who can make me beg like this
Looking at myself in the mirror and fighting with my ego the further I get from you the more I think of you
Tell me where I messed up
If my only error was loving you
Today I'm the loser
They've stolen my trick to make you fall in love
And tell me that you love me even if it's a lie
I can't deny you, this jealousy is killing me
And tell it to his face that you still breathe for me
My heart is splitting in two and I won't ever see you again
And tell me that you love me even if it's a lie
You can already see that there isn't anyone like me
and tell it to his face, that you still breathe for me
Don't trick yourself, you won't ever forget me
and if that makes you want to come back to me
I'll be waiting to answer you
I know that for your part you don't feel any resentment
Maybe tomorrow you'll be back to fall in love
When we used to drink we smashed, we filmed it, and we watched it
We were two crazy people not knowing where we were going
But that is talking about destiny
As time went on you chose your path
It's clear that you deserve someone better
I don't know where I messed up
But there isn't anyone like me
Tell me what my mistake was
If my only error was to love you
Today I'm the loser
They've stolen the trick to make you fall in love
And tell me that you love me even if it is a lie
I can't deny you, the jealous is killing me
and tell it to his face, that you're still breathing for me
My heart is splitting in to, I won't ever see you again
and tell me that you love me even if it's a lie
You can already see that there is no one like me
and tell it to his face that you're still breathing for me
Because of my breaths, you're not, you're not
And you know what?
He doesn't make love to you, he doesn't treat you right, and I was the first man in your life
153 notes · View notes
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posting my submissions here to influence people and make it harder for @artsimpourtzi to cheat
tomdaya
- bestest moment of the year:
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- most underrated moment of the year: the 72-hour trip to london after paris just to see tom's family with claire<3
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- most unexpected moment of the year: london was never the same after this
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- best pretzeling exhibit: zendaya falling off her bike and tom kindly helping her walk back home
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- sappiest moment of the year: doing charity work together<3
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- best photo of the year:
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- best couple outfit of the year: matching tz<3
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zendaya
- best moment of the year: winning her first golden globe and cca
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- best street outfit of the year: pissing off the dailymail chic
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- best red carpet look of the year:
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- best down bad moment of the year: get ready with me to be my boyfriend's cheerleader for the day while he plays the worst game of basketball you will ever see
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- best online moment of the year: of course this would happen the day before my birthday cause she did it for me
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tom
- best moment of the year: june 1st you will always be the best day on the calendar
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- best look of the year: valentino belt saved lives
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- best down bad moment of the year: this is just 1/4th of them
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- best online moment of the year:
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- most unhinged quote of the year: girl get up
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about tomdaya
- best noon moment of the year: humbling his superstar parents
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- best tomdaya captain of the year: it's a tie between marina doby nails and mark thompson from gettyimages
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- best tomdaya tea:
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- most unhinged anti theory of the year:
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- most memorable tomdaya rumour of the year:
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- best account of people seeing them but no pictures: getting exactly 0 crumbs from tz during virgo's groove not once but twice😔
- most insane tomdaya family and friends moment: choose your fighter
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tomdaya fandom
- best unglad art piece: all of them
- the ultimate papi award: monacunt
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- the "you had to be there" tumblr moment award: i judge your level of fun based on the way you reacted to this
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- biggest delulu moment of the year that came true: londonchristmas™ and concerttz™. can you guess what they both have in common?
- best tumblr running gag: revenge will win every tbt contest ever until the end of time
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- song of the year: 😝🤪😜🤪😜🤪
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- best tcr episode: if daniana has 0 fans it means i am dead
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pop culture
- best new couple: we know you made this category so kylothée don't go home empty handed
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- worst breakup: latisharry😢💔
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156 notes · View notes
noyatv · 5 months
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𝙨𝙩𝙮𝞘𝙚━ 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙧𝞘𝙚𝙨 𝞘𝙚𝙘𝞘𝙚𝙧𝙘
"ᴡᴇ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ɢᴏ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ sᴛʏʟᴇ!"
warning: jack & yn act like siblings, cheating (both yn and charles)
part 2→ is it over now?
im not commenting on this
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liked by f1gossip, wagcloset and 134,976 others deuxmoi f1 driver charles leclerc spotted kissing someone who looks identical to his popstar girlfriend, yn
f1gossip yikes user1 silly szn hasn't even started ↳user2 a literal shitshow
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liked by jackantonoff, pierregasly, isahernaez and 1,256,845 others ynln june dump w/@isahernaez & @jackantonoff
isahernaez she fell down the stairs ↳ynln lies
jackantonoff wonder who took the photos?? ↳ynln if the producing gig doesn't work out you have photography as a backup ↳jackantonoff kys
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Time blurred; 11:56. Another 3 minutes pass. A sign of life shows at the end of the road, the street lamps lighting the pathway. It stopped only a few feet ahead. The window rolled down.
"Get in."
"You drive cars for a living, do you not know what headlights are?"
"Shut up."
The lights in the apartment were turned off, a rustling sound emerging from behind me as Charles took his coat off.
"Heard you been out with some other girl."
"It's true," he paused. "But I can't stop thinking about you and I."
"I've been there too a few times."
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liked by f1gossip, formulagossip, and 547,278 others deuxmoi Pierre Gasly spotted cozying up next to an unknown woman in southern France
user1 that ain't an "unknown woman" THATS YN ↳user2 wish i was as delulu as you
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liked by pierregasly, lilymhe, jackantonoff, and 14,526,348 others ynln wish i announced this sooner, but its out, style (and the rest of 1998) is yours! special thanks to @jackantonoff for helping me produce it and @lilymhe & @alex_albon for listening to me complain abt my love life!
lilymhe THATS MY WIFE ↳ynln I LOVE YOU POOKIE ↳alex_albon 😐 ↳ynln whomp whomp (im sorry pls don't take lily away)
mercedesamgf1 playing 1998 on repeat, boss man is concerned, especially when he who i won't name walks by ↳ynln ily admin, more than 12 yo me loved jenson button
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slythereen · 6 months
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Hello there!
I’m new to f1 and Lestappen.
Is there a Charles and Max master post somewhere with their history? I keep hearing about the social media unfollowing and podium walk off and want all the tea and timelines.
Basically all I know about is the inchident.
Many thanks!
hello and welcome!! my scholarship (read: obsessively reblogging things or bookmarking them thinking i'll actually find them again later) tends to be VERY chaotic, but i know there are definitely compilations out there. i've read some great ones.
nini (@scuderiafemboy) has a LOT of lore content on tumblr and twitter & does a lot of translating of dutch interviews/manages to unearth old interviews all the time. the twitter thread of threads covers 2018 through june 2023! she also compiled some of the database on tumblr here.
@chibrary archives interviews, articles, etc., in glorious fashion. this is charles centric but naturally charles' history intersects with max's so there are some good pieces in there, like this 2015 article on the lestappen rivalry in karting. the #driver:max tag provides a lot of golden content (such as extended lore on the inchident!).
moments™
marginally related, but dani (lecstappens on twitter) once posted the video of max and charles being scolded and warned to behave themselves during the race following the inchident. one of my favorite pieces of lestappen info frankly... demon children. (also on posted by @il-predestinato on tumblr here. who, btw, is a gold mine of lestappen content.)
well, as long as i'm adding some favorite gems while i try to find the specific post i'm looking for... the lestappen singapore flag moment is my roman empire. i am also haunted by the awkward weather convo video. which i know is out there, but i am going crazy trying to find it.
i decided to just commit to the moments list, so here is charles drinking red bull gate 2023 (courtesy of @countingstars-17)
charles asking the tifosi to stop booing max at monza this year (@il-predestinato seriously has so much content)
this excerpt of max's manager talking about charles (@blueballsracing)
if i don't stop myself i will be here all year
more mini compilations !!
@hyacinthsdiamonds once produced a nice list of the ridiculous lore around lestappen that sounds made up
some 2021 specific "best moments" compiled by @coconutshygame
there is one post i am thinking of that touched on their wild lore/destined f1 rivalry etc. but i can't find it now so stay tuned 🫡
also, for some theorizing on the most recent lestappen debacles and what it all means with ferrari/rbr and a potential charles to rbr (ot charles to more power at ferrari) move:
@tsarinablogs is a Scholar™ with lovely essays
@valyrfia has an addition to the marketing mayhem
i recently compiled my unhinged #rbr-ferrari sticker war content to advocate for rbr charles here, which was added to by this anon with banger points
personally i use #rbr charles for the theorizing and delulu hours, but i think #lestappen rbr and #lestappen gate 2023 are also prime hunting ground for rbr specific lore
anyone who has info to share pls do ❤️ i know i'm missing loads of scholarship that is lost in the pits of my unorganized blog
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minhosimthings · 7 months
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For Love to Exist: A Hyunjin Fic
Synopsis: In which Aphrodite makes a plan for two loveless souls.
Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin × Fem!reader, includes rest of Skz (side characters)
Word count: don't know but it's really long
Warnings: Fluff, angst, slow burn, mentions of self harm, and mental abuse, reader is an orphan, mentions of food and drink. She/her pronouns used, reader has scars on her skin
A/N: this is sort of a self indulgent fic for me and it is dedicated to all the people in my life who have made me feel like I am worthy of love again. This is based off of my own experiences due to my abusive past and how I let those go with the help of the people I've met here in university. I based Y/N off of myself (I hope you don't mind) because I feel like Hyunjin would be the type of person to love s person, regardless of their past, and ignorant of their future (and also I'm too delulu for Hyun rn). I dedicate this fic to all the people around the world, who feel that they do not deserve a red heart, and an I love you everyday. I dedicate this fic to the little girl inside of me, who still thinks that she is unworthy of love.
For love to exist, souls should exist too. For love to breathe, souls should take a deep breath too. For love to live, souls should learn how to live too. But for you, souls simply did not exist. They were just imaginary things made up by boring adults to tell children why they married their partners, to mask whatever what going on in reality. Why would anyone believe in souls and hearts and bonds and all that bullshit? Kids, of course, believed it.
You, on the other hand, were taught by cold eyes, ever since forever. Cold eyes had taught you that warm ones always lied and that love was just a fairytale made up to increase the population of earth. Cold eyes told you that June wasn't about pretty flowers and sundresses. They taught you it was about the burning sun and the heatwaves. Cold eyes taught you that flowers were nothing more than biological creations of two genetically unique organisms. Cold eyes taught you that the world was just the Earth, just a globe and that the universe didn't care for a tiny speck like you.
Work, Eat, and sleep. Those were the only things you did with passion. Those were the only things in your life that you noticed and yearned for. It was painful to watch your coworkers at the company, who were below you, enjoy life so much. As chief editor, you had less work than they did, yet they saw life as a chance. They saw life as a chance to enjoy the fruits of the universe, while you still saw life as a scarred being. Funny, how you thought that everyone else was mad to have love in their lives, yet there you were with scars on your chest, both physical and mental, going unnoticed by the minute.
Until Hyunjin came into your life.
Hwang Hyunjin. Step son of your goddamned boss. You were told that he would be working alongside you as both an assistant editor and as a new cartoonist, replacing Mr Park, who had resigned five days ago. You groaned at the idea of having someone follow you all day, asking you if you needed anything. You were better off without an assistant or a cartoonist. But your magazine wasn't the leading magazine in South Korea for no reason. The illustrations provided alongside the thigh slapping articles always provided the greatest entertainment to the millions of readers. Mr Park was an old man, who was always quiet and mostly kept to his drawings, exactly your preference. Someone who doesn't annoy you or ask about your love life because apparently, at 23, a woman has nothing better to do. But a man, your age, who you've heard used to be a singer in a band, yeah that wasn't going to work with you.
Your boss had introduced you guys on his first day. He was.... surprisingly handsome. His eyes were like a kitten's, small and glittery, as if Andromeda had poured all her stars into them. His nose and jawline were so sharp, in total contrast to his gaze, soft and pinkish. You wondered why all those thoughts were coming into your head. Never before had they had even touched your mind, when you saw other men and women around you, no matter how pretty they were.
He worked in silence. Complete silence. He wouldn't even move his chair or anything. The desk on which he worked was so pristine and organized, very much like yours, exactly like yours. But there was an aura with which he worked on piece of paper with a black ink pot that you could only dream of having. It was like the sky favoured him, sunlight illuminating all of his features, including some tiny moles on his face. You couldn't help but admire his serious face, headphones in, with an ink stained brush moving swiftly across paper, tracing the tiny dots and lines of whatever he was making. You had first approached the company as a cartoonist yourself, having the skills because of an art minor. But soon the director saw you better as a journalist and slowly but surely you moved your way up the ladder to become chief editor. And when you saw other people doing something you used to love doing, you wondered if you hadn't accepted the job as an editor, would your life have been so mundane? So brown and still?
"Um Miss Y/N?" A voice broke you out of your stupor, starting you and getting your mind away from the articles on your computer screen. Hyunjin was standing next to you, holding pieces of paper in one hand and his brush in the other. He had a dab of ink sprawled across his nose. Cute, you thought.
"I, uh, finished the illustration for the first article you sent. Are they ok?" He gave you five pieces of paper, all with funny intonations on them, a cookie wearing hat, and an iguana wearing a DJ's glasses. It was cute, really cute you thought, as you gave them back to him, nodding in approval and shooting him a small smile. "You have ink on your nose, did you know that?" You pointed out to him, handing him a tissue from your tissue box, which he took and immediately disappeared behind his computer, wiping his nose aggressively. Cute, so cute.
You usually left work at eight thirty, not too late and not too early that you'd miss your tea. But something made you want to stay back today. Someone, specifically. Hyunjin told you that he usually went home by ten, since he didn't do much during the night. You refrained from telling him when you went, lest he question why you stayed back today.
"Miss Y/N I'll be heading out now. Good night." He held up his olive green bag and waved goodbye to you. Something inside of you wanted to say 'Wanna go together?' but you had always ignored that something so you instead waved back to him and started picking up your things.
That day, the old grandmother at the ramen shop you always went to said something was different about you and told you to smile more. You didn't know whether or not that was a complement but you took it willingly along with spicy ramen with beef.
"Miss Y/N I-" "Hyunjin stop call me Miss. Im your age. Just call me Y/N, alright?" You finally got that sentence out of your mouth after keeping it in for an entire week. An entire week Hyunjin addressed you with honorifics and today you wanted to tell him that just your name was enough. Just your name coming out of his mouth like a sweet melody was alright. "Oh well ok Y/N." He said with some difficulty, feeling awkward not using the proper words. "I wanted to say that lunch break began over two hours ago and you still haven't got up from your seat, so I uh bought you something. I asked your co workers what you usually eat so um yeah." He did what? You looked down at his extended hand, holding a box of your usual Ramyeon and an americano. You silently took the food from his hands, shooting him a quick 'thank you'. He deserved more than that, but at that moment, all your shocked brain could do was that.
Someone cared for you. Someone noticed that you weren't eating. Someone noticed how you stayed on this cold October day. And that was sort of sweet? Someone did that for you and for once it seemed he did not want anything in return. That couldn't be true, you thought as you silently ate your Ramyeon, all the while shooting tiny glances at Hyunjin, who was once again immersed in his drawings. Seeing him so deeply imbued in an art, which provided him a job, was so endearing to look at. He was doing something he enjoyed, while earning money for it. Isn't that what everyone in the world would love?
"Um Hyunjin? Hyunjin." You snapped your fingers in front of Hyunjin, who had his headphones on, with that brush back in his hand. He looked so cute, being broken out of his hypnotised state. His eyes blinked at you for a few seconds, before he took the headphones off and greeted you. "What is it Mi- I mean Y/N?" God he was so handsome. He was in a loose baby blue sweater and white pants today. He looked so dainty and fragile as if you touch him and he'll break. "I uh wanted to thank you again for the food today. Um. Any way I can thank you for it? Maybe buy you a coffee?" You could feel your cheeks getting redder by the moment. Even if he couldn't see the blush, you could definetly feel them. If your guardian angels were watching you right now, they'd be saying 'Y/N get your ass up and stop blushing so much.'. "Oh. Um uh" Hyunjin stuttered for a bit before checking his watch. Nine thirty am. There was still half an hour left to go home, meaning you both had enough time to grab a coffee and perhaps a bagel or something tasty.
"Oh course Y/N. But please do not pay for my food. You need not repay me for lunch." Your pleas for that sentence went unheard, as Hyunjin kept saying that he didn't want anyone to pay for him, reasoning that lunch was a basic human need and he was just helping his co worker out. Something about the way he defended himself and explained things was so adorable. It was like a ferret explaining why it's fur is white and why it's ears are so round.
"This is surprisingly good." You commented, as Hyunjin and you sat by the little round table in the coffee shop, drinking Americans and eating Macarons. Hyunjin raised an eyebrow at you, watching as you are your pistachio Macaron. "You never had a Macaron before in your life?" You shook your head at his question, trying to swallow your bite of the Macaron quickly, so as to answer his question. "No actually." You managed to cough out after what seemed like five hours of you chewing the sweet dessert. "I don't have a preference for sweet things. I used to but I grew out of it." Hyunjin looked up at you, from staring at his shoes. "You used to? Well I always used to believe that a sweet tooth could never grow out of their preferences. Turns out I was wrong then." The corners of your mouth twitched as your heart itched not to say 'why are you so perfect?' to the man sitting in front of you. "So what musicians do you listen to?" It was now your turn to look up at him with wide eyes. It was funny how both of you were eating food together like two normal human beings, yet neither of you dared to look at each other, or maintain direct eye contact for more than a fraction of a second. "Pardon?" You asked him, eyebrow raised and foot tapping on the floor. He stumbled back a bit and said, in a apologetic tone, "Oh I didn't mean to impose. Im sorry. I just thought, you know we see each other every single day, and I have never gotten to know what my coworker likes a dislikes so um.. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable." Seeing him apologize like that was like seeing a puppy apologize to a black cat. You probably looked scary right now, with your expression and your rigid figure, so it made sense for Hyunjin to react like that.
"Oh it's alright Hyunjin." You said, shooting him the tiniest smile ever. "People don't really ask me questions about myself that often so I was kind of taken aback." Hyunjin just nodded and hummed in response to your bland statement.
That night, when you went home, you thought to yourself, about how much you missed human interaction. Most often disassociation and loneliness were your favourite drugs, but Hyunjin asking you a simple question about your favourite singer, made those drugs seem pleasure less. Your therapist would have probably looked you up and down and immediately told you that you were in love, being the hopeless romantic he was. People were scared to approach you. You, with your head held high in the air, your gait threatening that of Hera's, and your expression, cool and wicked. But Hyunjin just casually asked you what musicians you listen to, as if he had known you for years and he was meeting up with you again, at a school reunion. It was shocking to you, how he could just say that, without stuttering. Yes he did stutter later on, but it was so adorable the way he apologized to you, hands nervously palming at his fingers and nose silently twitching. Maybe friends weren't so bad after all, you thought, as the stars looked at you in pity, talking amongst themselves, about where had God gone wrong with you.
A sticky note? Your boss never left sticky boss for you. Usually his assistant to deliver you messages. So who wrote this mysterious pink sticky note, stuck to your computer with a smiley and something written on it? You had arrived at work after Hyunjin today, who, once again was is a hypnotic state, lightly bobbing his head to whatever was playing inside of those blue headphones. You slightly suspected that the note was probably his, as you sat down on your chair, hanging your bag in the usual place beside your table. You pulled off the note from the computer and examined it closely. There was something written on it with a glittery purple pen.
I scared you yesterday with my question. So I'm going to ask you through a note. What musicians do you listen to? (PS you can answer through a sticky note too)
You noticed Hyunjin kept giving you small glances from time to time, only taking his eyes away from his art for a fraction of a second. Cute, you thought, really cute. This was by far the cutest thing he had done. You silently took up a glittery blue pen from your drawer and wrote some sentences on a different sticky note, knowing when you were going to stick it.
"Hyunjin could you do me a favour?" You tapped on his desk to alert him. He looked up at you once again, with those same doe eyes. You noticed the ink once again splattered on his nose. "Yeah?" "Could you take this up to Mr Kim once and ask him if this is how he wanted the article to be edited?" You handed him a blue file to take it upto your boss, which is silently took and went up to the boss's office, giving you enough time to stick the note onto his computer. You made a last minute addition to the note, before rushing off to the canteen, lest Hyunjin catches you in your mischievous act. Even though it was just sticking a note to your co worker's computer this felt like the most amazing thing you had ever done in your life, the most daring.
Where had you gone? Hyunjin had come back to his desk after handing off the file to the boss, who said he'd give it back tomorrow, only to find you nowhere to be found. He swore that he had saw you here just a second ago. Where had you gone now? Shrugging his shoulders and telling himself that you had probably taken a bathroom break, he sat back down on his desk, ready to complete the illustrations for the day, that you had given him yesterday, when he noticed something stuck to his computer. A green sticky note. Could it be? Did you respond to his very creepy, weirdo nerd way of asking you a question in order to get to know you better?
When Hyunjin sat down on his chair, and slowly pulled the sticky note out, he sweated that his heart had skipped a hundred beats (or 143 beats hehe). Your loopy handwriting was scrambled on it with sparkly blue ink.
This is very middle school of us to be passing notes in work but I like listening to Lana del Rey, Florence and The Machines, a bit of k-pop and lot of classical music. Now you answer my question along with your own question. What is your favourite ice cream flavour? (PS you have ink on your nose)
Hyunjin's soul was doing backflips in his stomach. Having an obsession for love, he wondered whether this was how Cupid felt like when he shot his first arrow. You listened to the same artist he did. He absent-mindedly wondered about what question to ask you next when you came out from the canteen, carrying lunch for the both of you. "Oh hey Hyunjin." You said in what you hoped wasn't an over active tone. "I uh got you lunch to pay back for when you got me lunch and um here you go." You awkwardly handed him the cup of spicy tteokbokki along with some other dishes and an Americano. As if returning the awkwardness, he mumbled a sheepish 'thank you', grabbed the food and hid behind his desk. Somewhere in the clouds Aphrodite was sighing, not knowing what to do with you two.
After a few hours, when you had gotten up to go the boss's office, Hyunjin saw his golden chance and took it. He scribbled his question onto a pink sticky note and quickly stuck it to your desk, frantically sitting back on his chair and pretending to be focusing on his cartoon which had long been completed.
Happiness. Happiness was all you and Hyunjin felt that night, when both of you parted ways. It was that happiness which a fourteen year old gets when their crush pays attention to them. It was mischievous happiness, as both you went home and pondered about questions and answers. Middle school romance was something neither of you had, with him not finding the correct person, who would love him for who he is, and you just not wanting love anymore. Aphrodite would be probably be smiling right now, twirling her roses and she makes the next part of her plan.
"Hyunjin! Over here!" It was raining very heavily today and you had chosen this very day to not take your car. Apparently Hyunjin had done the same thing, as both of you saw other close to the cafe a distance from your work. He didn't have an umbrella and you had spotted him running over in the direction of your work, blue hoodie gripped tightly over his head. "Did the universe have to choose the day I didn't get my car to rain?" He shouted at you as you both were shielded by your umbrella. "I was thinking the same thing!" You shouted back at him. "Let's get inside the cafe!"
The cafe thankfully wasn't crowded at all, and as you took off your coat and shoes to dry, you appreciated the heat coming from inside the cafe. It was on the more traditional side, with a wooden interior and sepia toned plants hidden in mud pots.
"Oh great." Hyunjin sighed. He was holding his phone is his hands, having taken off his hoodie and his shoes before you did and setting his bag down at a table for two. "Boss just texted. Work's cancelled for three days straight." "So we went through all that rain for nothing?" You deflated on the comfy chair, opposite Hyunjin, who was revealed to be wearing a dark blue shirt underneath his baby blue hoodie. "Well damn it. What do we do now? I didn't bring my car and neither did you. Do we have to wait out the storm here?" You asked him, wiping your face with a handkerchief. "Well we can." Hyunjin responded. "I think the owner will probably let us." You raised a brow at him at that statement while he just stared into space, as if expecting an alien to show up any moment. "How do you know the own-" "HWANG HYUNJIN YOU FINALLY DRAG YOUR ASS HERE TO SEE ME."
A very loud voice rang through the cafe, accompanied by a much quieter 'Hyunjin's here?'. Hyunjin groaned and buried his face in his hands, as a handsome man with olive skin, brown hair, and the prettiest nose ever, came striding up to your table, wearing the uniform of the cafe. He promptly pulled up a chair and collapsed onto it, next to Hyunjin, all the while playfully glaring at him. "Hey Minho hyung." Hyunjin mumbled, not looking directly at whoever this Minho was. The other man clicked his tongue out of disapproval and said, "Say that louder would ya? And why have you not been coming to visit me and emotional dump on me for like two weeks? Oh and who's this lovely young lady?" He looked into your eyes at that last bit, startling you a bit, at how round and black his eyes were, like tiny little boba balls. "I'm Y/N." You extended a hand forward. "L/N Y/N" Minho took your hand and shook it with a firm grip, before getting up and slightly bowing to you. "Well Miss Y/N, may I get you anything? Perhaps something which is not an Americano, which is what this monster" he motioned to Hyunjin "drinks?" You gave him a calculator look before saying, "Oh. Um I would like an americano actually and probably one for Hyunjin too please." Minho looked ever so slightly taken aback by your words. "As you wish!" He declared before giving Hyunjin and a smirk and leaving.
"So who was that?" You asked Hyunjin, whose ears were burning red. With a sigh, he put his elbows on the table, burrying his head in them.
"That was Lee Minho. A college mate of mine, who opened a cafe with a friend of his, soon after graduation, because apparently he didn't want to get into a boring job." He chuckled slightly at that. "He's a mentor to me. He's like I think two years older than me and he treats me like a damn baby. But it's fine cause I'm the one who helped him cheat on his exams so I get free shit here."
"Americano for two?" Oh hey Hyunjin!" A freckled boy had come up to your table, americano filled cups in his hand. His skin was porcelain, like glass, dotted with star like freckles, with blonde hair framing his beautiful face. "Hey Lix." Hyunjin patted the boy's back, as he set the coffee down on the table. "How's your mum now? Is the treatment working?" A smile never seemed to leave this boy's face, as he sat down in the chair which Minho had pulled up earlier. "She's good now. Much better! I've been sending her some brownies every now and then but she's still disappointed because apparently her son won't get a girlfriend." He slightly pouted as Hyunjin chuckled lightly. "Oh who's this? Wait are you-" the boy looked at you with excited eyes, before gasping and turning his head to Hyunjin. "Is this the Y/N you told me about?" He excitedly extended a hand towards you, which you took, experience pleasure at his soft grip and hands, which was in stark contrast to Minho's handshake. "I'm Felix! Lee Felix. Nice to meet you! Y/N right?" The amount of happiness radiating from this boy was so much that you thought he was probably the reincarnation of Helios himself. "Nice to meet you too Felix. I'd introduce myself, but judging from your excitement I believe Hyunjin's already told you about me." You gave him a smile, which he returned. "Yah Felix!" Minho's voice came from across the wooden walls. Felix groaned and got up from his chair saying goodbye to both of you and rushing off to Minho.
"They're really nice." You told Hyunjin, sipping on your americano. It was nice and weird to have people like you for who you are. It was kind of alien to you, to meet two people who knew about you. It was even more alien of Hyunjin to tell people about you. What could people tell about you? What fragments of your being attracted Hyunjin that he told his friends about your existence?
"Y/N are you ok?" Hyunjin's voice broke your mind from staring at the rain pouring outside. The storm had calmed down now and it was just lightly drizzling, drops staining the window, racing against each other. "Oh yes I'm good. Sorry."
"So you wanna talk about the notes or should we keep it a middle school secret?" Hyunjin's question rang across your brain, and as you sipped on your americano, you couldn't help but notice how innocent that question was. It was just a question. It wasn't an interrogative question, which you'd be punished for if you didn't answer. You fingers unconsciously went up to your wrists when you thought about that question. "What do you suggest? I'm alright with answering the question in person, instead of exchanging notes." You responded, keeping your tone casual, so as to not reveal the fast pace of your heart beat.
Hyunjin smiled at you and sipped on his americano again. "My favourite ice cream flavour is pistachio. And I also like listening to Lana del Rey and classical music. My turn now." He leaned forward slightly. "A song which you could listen to, for all eternity?" Musical questions were what you enjoyed the most, having being in love with music ever since your ears picked up the tune of twinkle twinkle little star. Hyunjin's question seemed hard, since your favourite song changed every few seconds and you couldn't just choose one melody to pleasure your ears for all of eternity. "Hmm" you responded after a while. "Probably Love by Lana Del Rey." "Why so?" Hyunjin asked.
"Because along with having an amazing tune and the greatest vocals ever," you started your lecture "It's also such a deep song. The way she is symbolising young love is so beautiful, from the way she alters her voice at certain lines to the lyrics themselves. I especially fell in love with the chorus because it signifies such a beautiful matter of being so much in love that even the tiniest actions can seem like elephantine gestures. Even that lyric 'The world is yours and you can't refuse it' it's so pretty. It's symbolising that feeling of ruling the world when you fall in love. Or atleast I think it does. I've never fell in love so."
You fell quiet after your rambling, hoping that it didn't freak him out how much you knew about one particular song, which you definetly did not write an entire essay about. L/n Y/n you've done it again. You've scared a person off because of your rambling about your hyperfixation because you have nothing else to love. Great job, you thought.
But as you looked over at Hyunjin's face, it was happy? His eyes were wide and his lips were slightly parted as if thinking what to say, his americano straw remained in his mouth, but he wasn't sipping on it. He was in total awe, something you couldn't see.
"That- that was amazing." He said after a pregnant silence. "I never thought about songs that way honestly. But I think from now on I'll start thinking of it like that." God his smile was so handsome. The way the corners of his mouth stretched and the way his lips always slightly parted, it was all so pretty. And since when have you became so observant? To notice a man's manner of smiling?
Aphrodite smiled again in the clouds, calling for her chariot, to take a ride across the sky, making up the next step of her masterplan.
It was still pitter-pattering outside the window as both of you finished your drinks. You declined Minho's offer to eat, since you had already ate a lot for breakfast and you weren't feeling hungry. You tasted a bit of Felix's brownies, for which you complemented the freckled boy so mich to point where his glass skin turned into stained red glass.
"God the rain is stopping, how the hell are we going to get home?" Hyunjin sighed, as he meant back in his chair. You both had put your shoes, hoodie and coat back on and were staring out the window. You had an idea in your mind. A peculiar idea. An idea unlike you. An idea made by your heart controlled mind. You know how they say that we should never let our heart control our brain? Well sometimes, just sometimes, in the tiniest moments, we could let it control our being just a little bit.
"Doyouwanttocomeovertomyhouseitsreallycloseby" "I beg your pardon?" Oh great you spoke the easiest sentence in the fastest way you could possibly imagine. You should probably get the Nobel Prize for the most awkward person ever. Taking a deep breath, you made eye contact with Hyunjin (perhaps for the first time) and said, "Would you like to come over to my house? It's close by and I can drop you off at your house if I get my car." Hyunjin looked slightly taken aback by your suggestion, and as he pondered over it with a series of 'ohs' and 'ums', you mentally scolded yourself. How could you never say the right thing ever? How did you manage to say the wrong thing every single time? How did you manage to scare off every person every single time? Were you really not capable of love? Was your mother really right?
"If I don't impose Y/N, I would like to come over to your house. I should actually probably get going home too, so I accept your offer, only if it doesn't bother you." Your heart lifted from where it was earlier. Listening to the words coming out of Hyunjin's mouth in the soft tone, was something so comforting to you. It was like the smell of old books, like the way flowers moved in the wind, like the way wine swirled in a wine glass and like the way melodies danced to the beat of a song.
"This is your house?" You and Hyunjin had walked all the way to your house, shielded by his umbrella. It was safe to say that your house was a very luxurious one, in the more expensive side, courtesy to your high profile job. It was a two bedroom house, with the most beautiful terrace and balcony anyone had ever seen, which gave a view of the Seoul skyline. "It's beautiful." Hyunjin breathed out. "Come inside." You said, taking off your shoes at the entrance and unlocking the wooden door. "Want some food?" Hyunjin shook his head as both of you entered your house, his mouth dropping on seeing the interior. You had a conversation pit inside your house, much like one of those 80's sitcoms, and it was the most queer thing in your house. It was purple and magenta, with white finishings and a pretty carpet, sitting below a glass table. "It seems the interior is much prettier than the exterior." Hyunjin said, as you both entered the pit, sitting down. You sheepishly smiled and mumbled a thank you, before getting up to get him some water, even though you both had downed a big cup of americano.
"Your books are really interesting." You had started showing Hyunjin around your house, and when you reached the library portion, he wouldn't move from there. Granted, you did have a pretty library, decorated with fake moss and hanging vines, which made it look like a shelf growing out of the forest. "What is so interesting about them?" You asked him as he stroked the book covers with his fingers, to which he smiled and pointed to the last two books. "Their arrangment is fascinating first of all. I mean The Animal Farm and Pride and Prejudice are sitting together, as if going for a tea party. Did you arrange them yourself?" You only nodded to his question, too scared to answer. "The second interesting thing about this bookshelf is that all the books are so dual to each other. You have Harry Potter-" he pointed to the topmost shelf, "then you have 1984-" his fingers went to a handsome leather book, "and then finally you have a pop up children'd book." He laughed pointing to the bottom most shelf, where a glittery pink book lie. You blushed, as you saw that book. It was the book, which your best friend at the orphanage had given to you, before she was taken away. You cherished it a lot, it being the only form of love you had ever recieved in your life. "Woah you have Taylor Caldwell too!" Hyunjin said, excitedly, his fingers bouncing on the shelf closest to him, where a series of faded books lie. "Do you want them perhaps?" You asked him, to which he gave you a sad smile. "I've always loved her since the age of eleven but I could never buy any of her books, courtesy to my mum thinking they're too 'westernised'." "You can take some if you want. I hardly ever read these ones." You pulled out some of the books and put them in his hands. He looked surprised and his eyes widened at you. After much trial and error, which included him refusing to take the books, and you threatening to leave him out in the rain if he didn't take them, he finally stuffed then into his bag, thanking you over and over again.
The car ride to his home was fun, to say the least. Hyunjin narrated some funny stories with Minho and Felix, and a few of his other friends. You were shocked to find out that he used to be in a band, where he played the drums. "You must play them for me one day." You said, as you pulled up to a light. "as payback for the books." Hyunjin gave you that sweet smile again, causing your brain to malfunction.
"Thank you for the ride home Y/N. And for the books." Hyunjin said as you both pulled up to his house. "Say I have a question." He said, before unbuckling his seatbelt (drive safely kids). "Would you ever be interested in spending your lunch break with me everyday? Cause I really like talking to you and I don't have many friends at work. Only if you want to though!" God he was so adorable with those round eyes and those cute cheeks. Was he actually so cute or was your hopeless brain just making it up?
Aphrodite sighed again as she watched you silently from the bushes, happy that you were going on the right path, but worried about the trajectory of your mind.
Spending time with Hyunjin were the best moments of your life. It was surprisingly fun to spend a part of your day everyday with Hyunjin. It was just lunch and americanos, fresh from Minho's cafe, since it was the only one you liked now. You warmed up to him more than you had wanted to, and for the first time, your brain didn't mind being ruled by your heart. Hyunjin had introduced you to some of his closest friend, who came to visit him at work, making sure he didn't overwork himself. And he had interesting friends. Apart from Minho and Felix, there was a producer group called 3Racha who wrote songs for a company called JYP. It was composed of the three most kindest people you had ever met. Jisung, Changbin and Chan treated you like their own sister, often picking up an Americano for you whenever they got one for Hyunjin. You met Hyunjin's youngest friends Seungmin and Jeongin at Minho's cafe, when Jeongin bumped into your shoulder, dropping his books and apologizing to you frantically. Both of them were University students, one having a pottery studio and the other studying computer science. They were mischievous little things, but you loved them too, with you sharing Seungmin's love for pottery and Jeongin's hatred for sugary foods. It was so fun, having friends, even if they weren't your friends from the beginning. This was the first time you had experienced happiness ever since you were eight.
The words on your books weren't skimmed over by your eyes anymore. Instead they were carefully taken in, word by word, appreciating how every letter formed the beautiful sentence. Now, winter wasn't about surviving anymore. Instead it was about being warm and cosy, all wrapped up in a big blanket, hugging a plushie and drinking hot chocolate as pretty winter flakes poured outside the window. Now you digged out the sundresses you haven't worn in so long, and you would wear them to work every now and then, catching the eyes of every person you passed (because you are the most beautiful person on earth LOVE YOURSELF I LOVE YOU). You never noticed it, but now, Hyunjin looked at you differently. He wasn't a very defensive person, choosing to end arguments quickly, but whenever his eyes set upon your figure dancing in a yellow sundress, embroidered with flowers, he swore that he would burn done the entire world for you. Both of you regularly met up at each other's house, having k drama nights, where you would do nothing but cry over the slow burn, and try out a new snack from the local convenience store every time. Sometimes Hyunjin would play the drums for you, taking your excited requests of the 70's and 80's rock songs. It was all so perfect, having Hyunjin in your life and every time you saw him moving his own across a piece of paper, whipping up a cartoon for you as a gift, your heart smiled, urging you to let it take over for just a little longer.
But Aphrodite had something else in plan.
Sometimes the Gods plan sinister things for humans. Sometimes they say 'lets whip up conflict'. And most often it's not between one human and another. Most often it's between a human and her own mind. You had gotten a call on a nice Thursday morning, when you were about to set out for work, clad in a white dress, which reached your knees. A call from your adoptive parents. Unbeknownst to the entire world, behind your pretty face, you hid a grief filled secret behind those glassy eyes. Your childhood wasn't all sunshines and rainbows. You had grown up in an orphanage basically your entire life, and at the tender age of eleven, you had gotten adopted by a rich couple. Good right? Nope it was the polar opposite. Turns out they had adopted you for their own benefit, to gain support from the media to continue their company or some bullshit like that. It had haunted you all your life, how they would never speak a word to you, never a word of affection. It was just words of 'who would ever love you?' and 'you aren't capable of love'. When you had gotten accepted in college, with a full ride scholarship, they had help a party, not for you, but to brag that their daughter, whom they did not even love, had gotten into a college all by herself. They had turned their devil tails into angel wings and it angered you, but you stayed silent. Why should you fight battles with other people when you could fight a battle with your own mind? You had cut off all communications with them however as soon as you left for college. Now it was just you and the world. Getting a job was the hardest thing and you still remember all those days that you survived on water and biscuits, like Marie Curie, when she used to research on radioactivity. You had learnt that your 'parents's' buisness had gone bankrupt, soon after you had gotten a job, but they still hadn't ever contacted you until this Thursday. It was Seungmin's birthday today and you had gotten him a puppy keychain, one that he had been wanting for a long time, which he had told you about in secret. You had purchased it the day before and wrapped it up in a cute box, writing some notes on the top. It was supposed to be the most perfect day. Happiness and melted ice cream that was what this day was supposed to be.
"Hello?" You had picked up your mother's call and your world came crashing down immediately. "Hey there Y/N. We need some money right now and we know you work for Mr Kim. Send us some money please." Not even a hello. The woman who had given you food and shelter didn't even say a hello. The woman who you owed nothing to didn't even say hello.
Hyunjin wondered where you were that day. You wouldn't ever miss a day of work and plus you were excited for Seungmin's birthday. You were going to go for a birthday party which was to be held at Chan's house. Hyunjin had told you that most of the boys would be bringing their girlfriends so you could meet them. You wouldn't never have missed this, especially not when your eyes lit up, when he had told you that Seungmin would be singing for you guys and Minho would be bringing his famous meat. So why? Why was your chair lying all alone and your americano untouched? He had asked Mr Kim whether you had called him today, to which he got disappointment when Mr Kim said no. Your boss didn't really care whether or not you took breaks, since you mostly finished your work in advance, in order to save time. That day Hyunjin told the guys, that he wouldn't be coming to the party, much to their disappointment. But they understood when he said that he was worried for you. He basically talked about you 24/7 and the boys still didn't understand how their most romantic friend ever ended up not knowing what love was.
Hyunjin had an extra key to your house, which you had given him after two months of knowing him, trusting him enough to keep an emergency contact. Hyunjin kept fiddling with it on the cab ride to your place, massaging his nerves to calm himself down. As he reached your house, the atmosphere around him changed. It became gloomy, even when the Sun attacked him with his rays. The sunflowers in your garden all seemed to bow their heads to him, as if to apologise.
"Y/N?" Hyunjin stepped inside your house, calling your name. "Y/N where are you?" He shouted a little louder this time. If you weren't in the living room, you'd be up in your bedroom or the library. Hyunjin slowly climbed up the stairs to the second floor, taking in the eerie silence of the house. It was such a loud silence. He could hear something in the distance but he didn't know what it was. Was it a cat? He heard a wailing noise that sounded something like a wolf crying.
The door to your bedroom was open. Hyunjin stepped inside, careful not to make a sound. He knew how creepy this was, to enter a person's house like this, but he didn't have a choice. "Y/N?" He called out, noticing the light in your bathroom switched on. "Y/N!" You were sitting on the floor, with a knife next to you. Your hair was in tangles and your body swayed back and forth, As you kept mumbling something to yourself. Your upper arm was slightly bleeding and your breathing was heavy. You had been lying there for the entire morning. You were still in your dress,which was now stained with blood from your arm. Your face was tear stained and your eyes were glassy. "Y/n. Hey look at me. Look at me. I'm here." You looked up to see Hyunjin's worried face, eyebrows furrowed and lips parted again. "Hyunjin?" You breathed out in a weak voice, which made Hyunjin's heart drop to his knees. "Yes it's me. Hey breathe. Please breathe for me." He coached you through breathing in and out, which calmed you down a bit, but you were still shivering and your skin was ice cold and white. You looked like a ghost. A ghost with sunken eyes and shocked expression stuck on its face.
Hyunjin carefully lifted you up and carried you to your bed, careful not to disturb your injury, which he immediately knew how it happened, from the knife lying beside you. He got some cloth and medicine for you from the first aid kit you hid under your bed, something you had told him a long time ago. You watched him with wide eyes as he carefully dressed your wound and got some water for you, forcing you to drink it.
"What happened? And it's ok if you don't wanna tell me." He sat beside you as you leant back against the bed frame. You tried not to catch his eye because you knew if you looked into those galaxies inside his eyes, you would start weeping. "Nothing happened Hyunjin." You mumbled, to which he scoffed silently, getting his hand up to your forehead to check your temperature. It was normal, thankfully you didn't have a fever. "Y/n" he faced you and out his hand on yours. "You know you can tell me right? I'm here for you and I'm worried. Please tell me what happened." It all happened so quickly. You looked into his eyes, taking in the stars inside of them, and you couldn't hold it back anymore as you burst out crying. Hyunjin was quick to hug you, holding your head gently as you buried yourself deeper in his chest, staining his grey shirt. His heart was breaking into a milion pieces, seeing his universe crying out her planets from her eyes. He shushed you from time to time, to make sure you don't become weak from crying.
"Y/N hey hey." He held you head in his hands, cupping your cheeks. "What's wrong? Just one word. Tell me one word. I beg you." You sniffled slightly and looked up at him, stopping you're tears slowly. You felt guilty, for him coming to you. Why should he? He's a human like you and he has responsibilities too and he should tend to them, not you. "Hyunjin, you should go. Y-you have S-Seungmin's party to attend. I'll be fine." Hyunjin knew how much you rejected being taken care of. Care was was word which simply never existed in your dictionary, courtesy to your past.
"Y/N-" "No Hyunjin!" You lashed out at him, tears brewing again in your eyes. Hyunjin now understood why the sunflowers outside had bowed to him, and why the aura was grey today. You had bottled up your feelings again, and one single word from a person of your past, was enough to break you. "I don't want help I don't need it! Just leave me alone! I don't want to be around you!" You panted a bit after shouting all that, your chest feeling heavy, not from the weight of your exhaustion, but from the weight of the entire world around you "Get out. Now."
The next few days, you came back to work, you avoided Hyunjin. You couldn't bear to look at his face, knowing that the stars in your eyes will collapse again if you do. You both worked in complete silence, with Hyunjin silently putting the completed illustrations in your desk, whenever you left to go to the bathroom. You now left at 9 am, instead of your usual 10 am along with Hyunjin. Your americanos seemed even more bitter now that you had no one to share your memories with. Every song in the world sounded like the same mundane melody now, chords repeating over and over again.
But Aphrodite always have something in plan, for souls like yours and Hyunjin's.
Hyunjin had been comforted by his friends for a week now. Every week, he would turn up at either Felix or Chan's house and cry to them. It broke their hearts to see their dearest friend weep and sob over you. You, on the other hand, would sometimes turn up to Minho, drinking his americano and venting your feelings, while he silently grilled his meat and put it on your plate. What you didn't know was that Hyunjin would be hiding silently behind the counter, listening to the notes of your voice talk about him. So one fine Saturday morning, he decided to do something. Something that would finally satisfy Aphrodite, and make her drop her roses down to earth to celebrate.
"Y/N." He called your name as you focused on your most recent article. "Y/N." He said again, when you didn't respond. "Y/N for Pete's sake, talk to me!" He basically shouted at you. You were staying back late tonight, courtesy to the hundreds of things you had to edit, due to your numerous amount of holidays. "Not now Hyunjin. I have to edit this." You spoke sternly, abandoning the fun filled voice you usually used when you were with him.
Hyunjin frowned at you, this time an actual frown, not like the playful ones he did when you would steal his meat from his plate. He was angry. He was angry at the world and at your mind for not treating you well. He was angry at your past, for making you believe that you were unworthy of love. He was furious and he would take it out right now, when no one except for you two were in the office building.
"Y/N listen to me!" He shouted, making you startled. You had gotten up from your seat and now you were cowering against a wall. You had never seen Hyunjin like this before, eyes narrowed and lips closed, burning anger seeping through them.
"Y/N you are quite possibly the most amazing person I have ever had the pleasure to meet in my stupid life. The way you walk the way you talk, everything about you is so amazing! It's so magnificent to me, how everyday you would explain the meaning behind a song, with your eyes all widened and your mouth moving fast! And it hurts me. It hurts me so much to see you like this, thinking that you are unworthy of love." His words were hitting you like bowling balls. "When you told me about your past, you know what I felt? I felt anger. True anger for the first time in my life. For the first time in my life, I wanted to burn down this entire world for a person. I was also so relieved that you trusted me enough to tell me about something like this. You really think I can't see the scars on your wrist through your foundation?" The scars on your wrist. How did he know about that? "Hyunjin-" you breathed out, crystals forming in your eyes again. "Y/N it breaks me. It breaks me so much to have a person like you in my life and not love them. I love you more than you can imagine. So why won't you accept it?"
"Because I can't!" The words spilled from your mouth like water spilling from a waterfall. "I can't Hyunjin! I don't know what love feels like! I never did! An-and when you came into my life and introduce me to all these amazing people, I felt so happy! For the first time in this dumb thing I call my life I felt happy. And I hated it! I hated the way Felix's eyes would light up every time he saw me. I hated the way Chan would always check up on me, making sure I don't overwork myself. I hated the way Minho would treat me like his own family, making sure I got the biggest portions of meat." Everything that you had kept hidden in that crack of your soul came running out. "I hated the way Jeongin looks up to me, telling me he admires the way I work! And you know what I hate the most out of all? I hate you! I hate the way you care so much for me and my stupid brain can't see it! The way you draw little cartoons on my americanos, the way you talk to me as if you were talking to a gentle lamb! I hate it Hyunjin! I hate myself for not seeing how much you love me! And I hate that I can't return the favour!"
Your knees gave way and you collapsed on the floor, sobbing your eyes out. Hyunjin was quick to kneel down next to you, hands searching for yours. Both of you looked into each other's eyes, seeing your entire universe's inside of them. You need love. You needed love to exist. And Hyunjin was there just to do that.
He leaned closer to you, eyes not leaving yours. He knew he had to do it now. Now or never right? Hyunjin, cupped your cheek with his left hand, right one still squeezing yours, and kissed you. He kissed you as if you were the most beautiful thing in the world. He kissed you as if you were the reincarnation of his last lover. He kissed you as if he had been wanting to kiss you for the last fifteen years. He kissed you, and you kissed him back. Your lips moved in sync with his, not moving away, hands wrapped safely around each other, both of you shielded from whatever the world was planning next. Time moved slowly again, as if the spinners of time had abandoned their looms to come watch you two.
And somewhere in the clouds, Aphrodite smiled, knowing that her mission was complete, and that two loveless souls had finally reunited, mending each other's cracks, slowly but surely.
Epilouge
"Hyunjin! We're going to be late! Hurry your ass!" You called out to your boyfriend of five years, as you waited by the door, bag clutched in hand, and white sundress flowing softly. The ash coloured cat you had both adopted, rubbed against your legs, purring and licking herself. Hyunjin had organised a 'special' date today, taking you to one of your most favourite places, a meadow by the beach, where you used to spend your days. It was already late in tbe evening, when Hyunjin finally came down from the steps of your house, still fixing his hair. "Alright Miss Universe, stop fixing your hair and come on!" You said, causing him to giggle, as both of you got in the car and drove off towards the sunset.
"God I love this place so much." You stretched your arms as you watched the dying sun, collapse into the ocean. "More than me?" Hyunjin pouted, as you slapped his chest playfully. "Oh god are those Minho's Macarons? These things are drugs to me." Both of you took a Macaron each, and raised them in the air, as if to make a toast. "Well, to our five year anniversary." Hyunjin toasted while you said 'hear hear!'.
"Y/N, I have a gift for you." You both had eaten all your food and we're slightly leaning against a tree, wrapped in each other's warmth. "What is it Hyun?" Hyunjin pulled out a paper from his pocket. A link sticky note. With Purple glitter pen scribbled on it.
Marry me Y/N?
"I thought I should do it in the way we first talked to each other. You know to make it more roma-" Hyunjin didn't get to complete his sentence, as you threw yourself around him, kissing him on his lips, as if you didn't kiss him every single day.
And Aphrodite couldn't stop giggling and smiling, knowing that now, love existed. And you? Oh you loved the existence of love.
147 notes · View notes
skz-streamer · 9 months
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Y/NNIE'S MASTERLIST (WIP)
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A masterlist for the 9th member of skz ;) ・❥・here to fill your delulu dreams・❥・
This master list is based off of a fictional female ninth member, y/n, of the 8 member boy group stray kids. Everything is either written in second person, or as an article. All fics/scenarios are at the bottom of the list. (I hope you can insert yourself in the interviews and stories well, I tried my best :)
This masterlist is a current work in progress, everything that is crossed out are things that I haven't even started working on, requests are always open no matter what :)
Kinda planning it like an oc but written in 2nd person if that makes sense? Idk
About
K-Profile・❥・Background ・❥・20 Questions・❥・What’s in y/n's bag・❥・Inside y/n's phone・❥・Pets・❥・A-Z quotes・❥・Playlist・❥・Likes and dislikes
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Relationships
Family ・❥・Skz・❥・Other idols・❥・Friends・❥・Fans・❥・Staff・❥・Amii・❥・Romantic
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Fashion
Hair・❥・Makeup・❥・Accessories ・❥・Closet・❥・Work・❥・Dance・❥・Travel
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PINTEREST BOARDS
Links to different outfits corresponding to each Skz era, only for imagination use :)
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Eras
mixtape ・❥・ i am not ・❥・ i am who ・❥・ i am you ・❥・ clé 1: miroh ・❥・ clé 2: yellow wood ・❥・ clé: levanter ・❥・ go生 ・❥・ in life ・❥・ noeasy ・❥・ oddinary ・❥・ maxident ・❥・ 5-Star ・❥・ Rock-Star ・❥・ TOP ・❥・ ALL IN ・❥・ CIRCUS ・❥・ THE SOUND ・❥・ SOCIAL PATH
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Discography
skz-record ・❥・skz-player ・❥・skz-replay・❥・Producing・❥・features
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Social Media
Insta・❥・Bubble・❥・Twitter
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Fans/News (solo)
Videos/compilations・❥・Scandals/controversy’s・❥・Solo events・❥・Magazines/articles ・❥・Other news・❥・Rumors・❥・Stan Twitter
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Broadcast
Interviews ・❥・Lives・❥・Vlogs・❥・YouTube ・❥・Kingdom ・❥・Skz survival show
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Skz
Events・❥・Texts・❥・Tweets・❥・Rachas ・❥・News・❥・Magazines/articles ・❥・Rumors
Misc.
Room tour・❥・Skz fam・❥・Concerts・❥・Representative animal
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All Scenarios/Writing pieces
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This master list was heavily inspired by @skz-bella @skz-kiana @skz-june @skz-saja @skz-suki
Credits to @ot8skz-wifey for helping me design this, the character ‘Amii’ is also inspired by her :)
All photos are either pulled off of Skz Bubble, Skz insta, or Pinterest - I tried my best to find no-face pics for y/n
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Permanent tag list: @eee5533 @mixtape-racha @ot8skz-wifey @ren0325 @felixvsp
Click here to be added❤️
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juhaknyeonies · 10 months
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choi seungcheol smau (scoups)
music major!seungcheol x cinematography major!reader
summary: you left home early and don’t have anyone to dorm with at the dorms so you take up rent with a friend, you need to find a job but it’s been a struggle for you and you can’t just let your friend pay rent by yourself so when you find a job you immediately take it but what you didn’t realise was this job had you moving around a lot more than you wanted too. atleast he’s rich, right?
genre: humour, fluff, romance, slight angst
warnings: landlord is a prick, sick people (illness), isolation and arguements
started 27/06/23 - ended tba
updates: every saturday and thursday
feel free to ask to be apart of taglist
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a/n: i am not american so the dates when the academic term starts and ends may be a little different, also years of when certain people graduate will be different based on their major.
term 1: early february - early april (beginning of the academic year)
2 week break
term 2: late april - late june
2 week break
term 3: late july - late september
2 week break
term 4: early october - mid december (end of academic year)
6 week break and repeat again
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the beginning
profiles 1 (y/n’s squad 😝)
profiles 2 and 2.5 (12 broke uni students + mingyu)
beginning of academic year
recording #1: day too early..
recording #2: job stealer
recording #3: the girl in vernon’s class
recording #4: ncity liquor
recording #5: job interview = happy cheol
recording #6: can you drive??
recording #7: today is not my day
recording #8: guilty
recording #9: are you girlypop?
recording #10: accidentally asked a girl out…
recording #11: cute
recording #12: sleep on the floor
recording #13: texting, i’m bored
recording #14: my fav cousin
recording #15: i wanna go, but i don’t but i did!
recording #16: drunk one-sided fight
recording #17: not jeonghan approved
recording #18: they finally did work!!
recording #19: stupid landlord
recording #20: sorry lee seokmin
recording #21: no they aren’t actually dating.. yet!
recording #22: he’s whipped whipped
recording #23: rtl or fear?
recording #24: rejected but not to your face.. ouch.
recording #25: y/n’s twitter
recording #26: delulu
recording #27: woozi got my back
recording #28: ngl thought it was obvious
recording #29: best wingmans ever
recording #30: spending $127 on someone (simp!)
recording #31: something on your mind
recording #32: oh okay
recording #33: mansae mansae mansae
recording #34: i’m sorry, it was urgent
recording #35: yayaya lets have fun!!
recording #36: gotta go (not by chungha)
recording #37: just s.coups and woozi
recording #38: jeonghan and y/n
recording #39: get on twitter!!!
recording #40: im back, im sorry
recording #41: same dream, same mind, same night
recording #42: cinematography is fun
recording #43: regular (job version)
recording #44: ubb file??
recording #45: creation of adore u (wip)!!
recording #46: quiet
recording #47: for you ofc <3
recording #48: its obvious i adore you
recording #49: lets wait for the future
recording #50: thank you
end of academic year
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311 notes · View notes
asteroidzzzn · 9 months
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stargirl | part 4
pairing: leadsinger!ellie x bassist!reader
warnings: cursing, smoking, drinking, eventual sexual themes, ellies still closed off, reader is ridiculously delulu for a while, kinda angst im so sorry
songs in this chapter: do i wanna know - arctic monkeys
word count: 2.1k
a/n: i put my whole asterussy into this. also changed the pairing thing bc reader made a bit of a career change
summary: now that you're officially a the fireflies bassist, you're going on tour, where trouble will be looking for you.
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it all arrived sooner than you thought it would. sooner than you were prepared for. you were told you were given twenty five to thirty minutes to get up on stage, sing some songs, and leave. you had good songs prepared, and you would practice all night in the hotel room before you performed.
seemed simple enough, right?
it was only a stadium nearly sold out by ten thousand people, maybe even more. and worst of all, you would have to sing. you had wished there was a contract you signed after joining the band, saying there was no way in hell you would sing in front of an audience, let alone a song you wrote.
but your mouth failed you when ellie asked you to be the one to sing the duet with her. yes was the only answer you could manage. for some reason, you felt a bit more at ease when you noticed the flash of a smile on her face your words caused.
you were getting used to ellie. you knew nothing about her past, but to be fair, she knew nothing about yours. it was surface level for the most part, except for...
you couldn't stop thinking about the journal. her songs. the trust she must have had in you. the lyrics. it made your head spin when you lingered on the memory. her masked grins, the blush hidden under her freckled cheeks, the way she sounded when she laughed gently, and how you had thought about bottling it up and selfishly keeping it just to yourself.
the way you had learned so much in that one night, yet so little. there were embarrassing instances where you would upset ellie by doing something so ordinary, such as complimenting her tattoo, and asking who did it. dina would pull you aside, muttering that "it's not about you, she's just having a bad day."
she never brought up the night when you shared your songs with each other. by the next morning, it was back to the tolerating sort of distance that was safe enough and never changing.
she treated you like a coworker.
༊*·˚
you were in the car, headphones in your ears playing a calming melody while you were half asleep. jesse rested with one hand on the wheel as dina curled up in the passenger seat, trying to get some sleep as well. ellie tapped a rhythm on her thighs and whistled a soft tune.
you yawned quietly and shifted around, pulling your blanket higher up to your neck. you made sure to keep distance between you and ellie. back in june, you found out the hard way that ellie didn't quite appreciate physical touch as much as the average person.
she mumbled something you didn't understand with your headphones in. apparently, the blanket had shifted off her lap when you tugged it towards yourself on the other side of the car.
her hand ghosted over your neck, leading up to your ear, sending harsh chills down your spine. your gaze shot to hers when she pulled one of the buds out of your year, and leaned closer to your face to whisper.
"don't steal the blanket, it's freezing."
you scoffed and paused your music. "is that really what you woke me up to say?"
"well, yeah. do you want me to die of hypothermia?"
"you'll live. and i'm not stealing it, because it's mine," you said, turning your head away to face the car door.
"oh, that's my bad. i thought it was your little sisters or something. cause, y'know," she said under her breath, but you caught it.
"i'll have you know, people of any age can own a disney blanket."
"whatever you say, princess."
your eyes widened against the blanket. you attempted to level your voice.
"saying shit like that will have you dying of hypothermia," you teased back over your shoulder.
"wait, no, actually. i'm really cold," she huffed out air in amusement, and promptly shivered.
you let out a heavy sigh. "okay, fine," you adjusted to sit in the middle seat, avoiding looking at her entirely as your thighs pressed together, but she didn't seem phased.
your head fell back against the headrest. you watched the stars fly by through the sunroof until sleep found you once more.
about an hour later, the car hit a bump. immediately after, jesse hissed, throwing a hushed, "sorry, guys!" towards the backseat.
your heads flew forward. you winced at the harsh awakening and glanced to your right. ellie had twisted to have her torso leaning on yours, as her head rested on your shoulder.
your breath hitched. she woke up quickly and pressed her hands on the seat to sit up, distancing herself from you.
you opened your mouth. an apology, maybe? your mouth closed. your gaze remained on ellie's. her expression was unreadable, but you could tell she was exhausted.
her voice was smaller than you had ever heard it when she finally spoke up.
"...just...for..."
you barely registered her breaths as words. her touch was light. she settled back into the position with her head on your shoulder.
you didn't dare say a word.
༊*·˚
you checked into the hotel at four in the morning, the next day. you were barely conscious of what you were doing, where you were going. dina handled the logistics, as she was the only one who had gotten enough sleep to be functioning at the early hour.
you trudged into the room. it was beautiful and spacious. two large beds were lined up on the left wall, a sliding glass door that led to a balcony with chairs and plants, a coffee table, a television, two closets, and a bathroom, with a shower and a bathtub.
while hauling your belongings onto the first bed you saw, dina explained that she and jesse would leave the door between the neighboring rooms unlocked in case you or ellie needed anything.
if it weren't four in the morning, you would have come up with a quick excuse to switch rooms. to not be stuck with ellie for a week straight, sleeping just a few feet apart.
unfortunatly for you, you nodded and let her slip away. the door clicked shut.
sheets rustling behind you and crickets chirping were the only two noises to be heard. you saw ellie had slung her suitcase on the bed and begun unpacking her clothing to fold them into her bedside drawer.
if it weren't four in the morning, you would have made a quip at her, something along the lines of, "you don't look like someone that folds their clothes so neatly."
there were a lot of things you would have done differently if it weren't four in the morning.
you stole a glance at her, that lasted a moment too long. she caught your eyes, and stared back. you said nothing. a silent agreement, that the events of this night, as well, would be left to be forgotten. never mentioned again. a secret. your secret.
it was a sudden, uncharacteristically timid habit you and ellie found yourselves doing.
glimpses hidden. the pointless acts of kindness, because one of you happened to remember a small detail. just by chance. nervous hands stilled by another pair. and there was nothing more. it meant nothing, you would tell yourself. there were just two hands searching for warmth, finding each other under tables, out of view.
there weren't jokes between the two of you. teases that could be interpreted in a way that meant things were real.
maybe this was just an act of convenience. maybe she did this with anderson, too. maybe you weren't all that special, or all that different.
but you couldn't deny the way she made you feel. so special, and so noticed.
on friday night, the four of you were huddled on the floor.
"you good, man?" jesse nudged you with his bottle, and took a swig. he passed it back to you.
you nodded with your eyes screwed shut due to the taste of the alcohol. you swallowed.
"i'm nervous. i haven't sung in so long, and i've never been in front of an audience this big. i'm terrified, actually," you said, your head beginning to buzz. your hand raised for you to take a large sip, but ellie caught your arm.
"hey, easy up on that. can't be hungover on stage."
"don't act like you care that much," you said, a pent-up hint of rage in your voice. you were angry at her. you were angry at her for being able to be so kind sometimes, yet so distant and strange, and everything else without a single explanation. but you needed to stop. before the alcohol urged you to say things that were meant to be unsaid. ellie's tongue poked her cheek as her eyebrows furrowed.
she ignored your comment. "we should practice the bridge of do i wanna know."
"i just need to get some sleep," you mumbled, pushing against the floor to stand up, but she dragged you right back down by your shirt. her tone became stern.
"we're practising. i won't let you get up there and embarrass me tomorrow. you said you were ready for this, so act like it," she emphasized her words with points directly at your chest.
"fine," you spat, digging into the pile of sheets scattered around for the song. ellie plugged in her guitar, and flipped a few switches.
"what are you doing?"
"i said we're practicing, so i'm making sure the guitar actually makes noise. for the song. songs kind of need music, if you didn't know. fuck else would i be doing, smartass? you always this insufferable when you're drunk?"
"i'm not drunk." you had to bite back a meaner response. in your peripheral, dina and jesse shared confused looks.
dina patted jesse's leg. "hey, we're pretty tired, and i think we've done enough preparing for tonight. see you guys in the morning," she gestured for jesse to stand up as well, who said a quick goodbye.
and shut the door.
"ready?" ellie glanced at you through her eyebrows.
you nodded, and she tapped her guitar, muttering five, six, seven, eight.
she was nearly whispering the lyrics. you inaudibly cleared your throat, and began to sing. you echoed along in a breathy, light tone when the song called for it, although most of the song flowed as a conversation between you and ellie.
it ended as quickly as it started, with one final strum, followed by silence. ellie set the guitar on the floor, and set her hands in the now empty space in her lap. her mouth opened hesitantly.
"that wasn't bad—"
"i'm heading to bed—"
the two of you spoke simultaneously. you stood up in a rush. you stared at her for a moment, then turned into the bathroom. you cleaned up and changed into your pyjamas.
you stared at the ceiling. your eyes found ellie, who was settling into bed herself. her body was turned away from you.
"...i'm sorry," you whispered.
ellie's head turned over her shoulder.
"why?"
"for being a bitch."
she snickered at that, and shifted so you both lay on your sides, facing each other from opposite sides of the room. she remained quiet, which urged you to go on.
"i'm terrified, ellie. i shouldn't have taken my fear out on you. you're right. i did say i was ready for this. but it's still...difficult. i don't want to disappoint you guys," you whispered as low as possible, with a sliver of a tremble in your voice.
her gaze softened. a minute passed. your ears rang from the silence. since you didn't have anything more to tell her, and she seemed to have no response, you flipped to face the dark wall, and shut your eyes. a tear slipped through your eyelashes. you made no attempt to rub it from your cheek. or the rest of the tears that began dropping, for that matter.
"goodnight," you said.
the opposite bed creaked. the wood under your own creaked. you felt her body beside you. she wouldn't touch you, she only laid there. maybe she waited for you to say it was okay. you moved to rest on your back, with your face near hers.
your eyes fell on each feature on her face. studying her. searching for something.
"goodnight," she whispered, inching dangerously closer to you.
you held your breath. you felt her own on your nose.
"tell me to leave, and i will."
"no," you shook your head weakly.
you grabbed her hand and flipped to face away from her. you placed her arm around your waist, and settled into her hold. her face nestled into your neck.
you took a deep breath, and fell asleep.
in the morning, you woke up not beside ellie, but an imprint on the mattress.
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a/n: bleeeeh :p xD ☆*: .。. o(≧▽≦)o .。.:*☆ i promise this does have a happy ending it will get there eventually i just needed some angst 🙏
taglist: @ximtiredx @gold-dustwomxn @elliesinterlude
also ill just tag some people that have commented on any of the earlier parts, so comment if u guys wanna be on the permanent taglist! :3
tags: @cassharass @lunarpretty @emluvselandabs @inf3ct3dd
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revengemode · 3 months
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The 2nd Artsimpourtzi Annual Awards
The MCA Way
Tomdaya
Bestest moment of the year (aka the Arts Golden Crown award)
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Most underrated moment of the year
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Most unexpected moment of the year
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Best pretzeling exhibit
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Sappiest moment of the year
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Best photo of the year
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Best couple outfit of the year
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Favorite concert
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Best city of the year (aka the MCA award) Paris London 🏆
Zendaya
Best moment of the year Zouis Vuitton Announcement
Best street outfit of the year Z The Conqueror
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Best red carpet moment of the year
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Best down bad moment of the year
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Best online moment of the year
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Tom Holland
Best look of the year
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Best moment of the year
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Best down bad moment of the year
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Best online moment of the year
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Most unhinged quote of the year: "It’s interesting being in a romantic relationship with someone that is in the same boat as you. You can share your experiences and all that sort of stuff. And that’s worth its weight in gold" The Rizz Shit. My bad.
About Tomdaya (friends, family, lore)
Best Noon moment of the year: Noon In Paris tuh
Best Tomdaya captain of the year: Forever and Always Tuwaine
Best Tomdaya tea:
Most unhinged anti theory of the year (aka the Flodaya award): They were not in the Caribbean
Best account of people seeing them but NO PICTURES 😭: The Caribbean again
Most insane Tomdaya family and friends moment: Noon and you know whos in London
Tomdaya fandom
Best unglad art piece: I can't find shit in her archives but there are manyyyy
The ultimate papi award: Monacooooooooo
The sappiest tumblr moment award: There was a new one every month
The horniest tumblr moment award: Pick anyone in the Unholy Trinity
The "you had to be there" tumblr moment award: Haaaaatwoman
Biggest delulu moment of the year that came true: The June Agenda
Best tumblr running gag: Flood of Antis = Content
Thank you gang @artsimpourtzi ! Try to be fair this year.....
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moonastrogirl · 4 months
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Escape the matrix month by month with astrology
Credit @moonastrogirl
Escaping the matrix is still working, paying bills and being a normal citizen. Escaping the matrix is having money to fulfil our needs and desires plus taking accountability for our actions and decisions. It’s not living in delulu land. Escaping the matrix is an inner job. It’s raising our authenticity and our frequency so that others do the same around us.
Escaping the matrix is easy. Just avoid doing what everybody is doing at the same time.
For instance : when the time for sales arrives, do not buy anything. Do the opposite. Give to others. Society wants us to buy stuff, clothes and get distracted at the beginning of the year. Why ? Because we must not. We must focus our energy into ourselves and not get distracted. Same goes for the Black Friday.
-> Where attention goes, energy flows.
In January Aquarius’s energy urge you to look at yourself and ask : What kind of person are you ? Who are you ? Who do you want to be ?Know yourself and heal yourself in January.
What does Aquariuses do best ? Think outside-of-the-box. They are knowledgeable and innovative people who improve the world. So that exactly what everybody should be doing.
-> Aquarius is also the humanitarian of the signs. The best thing to do is charity work and donate clothes in January. It’s cold outside and homeless people have it worse when everyone is outside spending their money on sales and not looking in their direction. Look at them and show empathy. Help them if you can.
In February do you really need to buy or receive flowers and go on an expensive dinner date to show love to your lover or you can simply just do it all year long ? Again don’t buy anything.
-> Do not participate in traditions which are designed to distract you from what you need to do.
February is Pisces season and Pisces are amazing at anything they do once they believe in what they do. They are not delusional, they just believe wholeheartedly in what they want to do, have and achieve. Like Pisces believe in yourself in February. Only do what you believe it’s best for you and you only.
In March like Aries, be your authentic self and become yourself. Take action on yourself and your authenticity like Aries be assertive in who you are. Like Aries be your true self. Show up as your true self and be authentic in every room you are in. Be the definition of what you see is what you get. People must see through your actions and your presence who you truly are.
In April do not be part of April’s fool. Just completely ignore it. Forget about it and go on with your life as if it doesn’t even exist. If people try jokes on you, ignore them. April is Taurus season. Tauruses are stubborn, grounded, strong willed and they know how to stay in their lane. Do the same.
In May the intellectual and stimulating Gemini’s energy urges us to think by ourselves and for ourselves. Think critically for yourself. Do not be influenced by other’s opinions and thoughts on someone or something, think about it yourself for yourself.
In June the sweet and caring Cancer’s energy asks us to feel. Feel your feelings and how you feel about yourself, your surroundings and people you meet. Ask yourself : what am I feeling right now ? Do not suppress your feelings or your emotions because they are compass guiding you.
In July Leo’s energy is here to make us focus on self love. Love yourself even when you don’t feel like loving yourself, even if you are alone, even if you don’t feel beautiful. Love yourself no matter what.
-> Again July is the time of sales and you know what it means : do not buy anything. There is a reason why sales take place in January and July. Those two months are important ones where we should be focusing on ourselves.
-> Self love has little to do with how much you can spend. Self love has everything to do with you, who you are, how you express who you are and what you love most. Self love is rooted in joy. The joy of being yourself.
In August Virgo’s energy asks us to examine, analyse and assess ourselves. Did we do what we needed to do to get here ? What else need to be done ? Abundance comes from analysing ourselves. It’s the month of harvest number 8 in numerology. The karmic month. We reap what we have sow the past months of the year.
In September Libra’s energy ask us to balance ourselves. Work on your confidence and find balance within yourself. Do not overdo, do not underdo. Balance yourself to balance your life.
In October Scorpio’s energy ask us to desire ourselves. Are we attracted to ourselves ? How is our sex life ? Do we please ourselves or please others ? People pleasers don’t see themselves as sexy and attractive.
In November Sagittarius’s energy is made for us to think big, to expand and have the vision to create our dream life. Sagittarius is optimistic and see the bigger picture. Expand your vision in November and see clearly.
In December Capricorn’s energy urge us to do things, to work and to use ourselves to make things happen in our life. After the vision Sagittarius gives us. Capricorn is the execution part. Do not get caught up in the Black Friday bs it’s a distraction once again from fully embracing the energy coming our way. Do not use yourself to benefit others. Use yourself to benefit yourself.
If you resonates with this post and you find it useful, please like, leave a comment or reblog it. It needs to be seen by as many people as possible to raise our collective frequency this year. Thank you for reading me 💜
Credit @moonastrogirl
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