#just something i mulled over

[austeretrav]

it's easy to criticise others for acting this or that way until your friends are part of said others

[salemoleander]

I am BARELY resisting going full red-strings-corkboard on this season. And by barely resisting I mean not resisting at all here is an extremely long list of the events those pins would be marking out.

BigB getting a Task that was a different color than everyone else's. It's not just a randomly assigned Hard Task, bc Scar rerolled for a Hard Task and his was also just a white envelope. It's fundamentally different.

That task taking BigB away from socialization, and seemingly being an incredibly time-consuming and dull request. Of profound disinterest to any watchers.

The phrasing of his Task!!

Dig a big hole. All the way down. At least 3x3. Make it your base if you want.

Everyone else's are direct and formal - the only one with more than one sentence was Skizz's, with the rule clarification of "One attempt only." Bigb's Task is four short abrupt sentences. It is also the only Task to contain extraneous information, 'Make it your base if you want.' The requirements (at least 3x3) feel like an afterthought to mimic the numerical/specific demands of the other tasks.

Evo symbol on the face of the Secret Keeper statue.

The fact that there's a statue at all; the fact that there is a physical representation of what is assigning tasks that everyone must complete, when previously everything was always handled via commands and unseen RNG.

Grian talking to the statue, and (bc of his Actual Role as game organizer) acting as a mediator for the impartial decisions handed down, speaking for it.

Grian making one last bad joke and saying he doesn't know if it counted or not- depends on whether we the audience laughed.

Grian asking for task recommendations from the audience. The watchers are making the tasks. The Watchers are making the tasks.

Again I could be off-base, and I'm not usually even that smitten with bringing in Evo lore. I don't want a Big Bad really...but. It feels like something very unusual and intentional and cool is happening in this series. And I'd guess we'll know if theres something going on once we have more than one data point.

My largely unfounded suspicion is that there is another being (maybe Listeners, maybe something else) trying to reach out to the Players via decoy Tasks, and BigB was the first recipient. Get them alone, make them of disinterest to the watchers, and tell them something we don't get to know.

Because that's the really, really fucking cool part (if my wacky theory is remotely right): We're the bad guys. We're the ones giving out tasks - hell, we're the ones actively brainstorming harder and crueller tasks in Grian's comments!

If they actually made a story where the Players have to keep secrets from us I will be delighted. Bc that is the same genius bullshit that made Evo Watcher lore so fun

[hawnks]

The fact that True And Mutual Love Domain ….. looks like that. The fact that Yuuta’s idea of love in general looks like that. Everything he does is for the sake of love. His whole understanding of the world is about love. He’ll do anything for love. He’ll die for love. He intends to die for love. Love is careful and caring and diligent and powerful, but most importantly love is a graveyard.

[asacchi]

for @skania i have read the last chapter of your beautiful sk fic a few months ago, and it made me feel so many things. sadness it’s over but also relief at that beautiful ending. i cried a lot. thank you so much for finishing it. I will always cherish it. 

[bruhstation]

My pet peeve is when people shit on fandoms they don’t get because they’re perceived as childish since they’re cartoons usually for children (looking at people I know giving me guff for my Lego Ninjago fixation even if it’s a less obscure example) so honestly even though I don’t get TTTE I followed for the art and designs because that kind of passion is something that inspires me!

lego ninjago’s awesome…. I don’t go there but from what I’ve seen it looks rad. glad to see that my artistic endeavor inspires you XP let’s all have fun!!!

[electricea]

i don't really like making posts like this because i don't want them to become a habit and i'm not really used to talking about my personal feelings, but i did want to say, i'm sorry for seeming spaced out and absent. 2024 just hasn't really been my year and sometimes i get into these ruts. it's not due to any person or thing that happened, sometimes i just get into these ruts and it can take a bit to pull myself out. i just hope i've never come off of as absent or disinterested or irritable. time and trying to focus on the positive always helps. just thanks for being so patient and kind to me, always. if i can ever do the same for you, just reach out and i'll do my best to listen. 🌻

[puhpandas]

Tony Becker vs. a Panic Attack

(3,320 words)

Gregory helps Tony with a bully, but has a panic attack in the process. Tony helps him through it as much as hes able. (!!!warnings: a panic attack, a fistfight, implied/referenced past child abuse, pepper spray mention)

Tony had just been trying to get through the school day.

Usually, bullies leave them alone. Tony and Ellis and Gregory. It's not that they're immune, just that they're pretty much invisible. They're more ignored than ridiculed.

But of course, they've had their share of targetting. Enough to recognize which day is gonna be an eventful one, where the bullies decide to pick on them that day for whatever reason.

This is one of those days. Mitch Watterson is one of the more bigger, bulky kids in class. Not much of an airhead, but more just overconfident in himself because he grew up being feared by others.

At least that's what Tony thinks. He likes to do that. To try to understand why some people are the way they are. Its interesting to delve into what events could lead up to the person they are today.

Mitch has been eyeing him all day. First it started with mean stares, then turned into tossing paper balls at his head in class, until it eventually evolved into Mitch throwing taunts at his back.

Tony knew this was coming all day, which is why it isnt suprising when Mitch corners him at his locker, when school is minutes away from being let out for the weekend.

"How many did your dad kill again?" Mitch sneers at him when Tony hadn't reacted the way he wants so far. He'd been targeting basically the one thing Mitch knows about him that's a sore spot; his Dad. So far, it's taken everything in Tony to not spew what he thinks are facts at him, just to defend his Dad.

"Enough to get caught." Mitch grins at him, a glint in his eye that only gets more prominent when Tony finally reacts.

Tony furrows his brows so hard they hurt. He frowns as he says "He didnt kill anybody. It was just a felony--"

"It was just a felony." Mitch interrupts, his voice high in pitch to mock Tony's. "Heh. Why are you defending him, are you like him? You gonna kill me, too? Are you planning my murder right now?"

Tony grits his teeth as he slams his locker door shut, but he stays silent. He knows Mitch doesnt know what hes talking about, just saying things that may be hurtful, even if they dont make any sense. He really wants to hit Mitch right now, but he knows hes pretty average for his size while Mitch is big and beefy. He would be starting a fight he couldnt win.

Mitch doesnt seem to have the same restrictions, though. When Tony doesnt respond, he let's out a mean cackle and begins to step towards Tony menacingly.

"Maybe I should snuff you out before you can begin." He says, a mean smile on his face as he boxes Tony in. "You're the son of a criminal, and apples never fall far from the tree."

Tony knows that isnt what Mitch really cares about, hes just spewing bullcrap to rile up Tony before he beats him up. All Tony can do is back away to keep distance between him and Mitch, and he hisses under his breath when his back hits a wall.

Mitch cackles at the display, and Tony feels panic grip his chest. Mitch has Tony right where he wants him, and if he doesnt do something soon, Mitchs fists are soon gonna start flying.

Tony wracks his brain for a plan, or even just an idea on how to get out of this, and right as he begins to form a short half-hazardous plan, a figure steps in between him and Mitch.

If the blue shirt and spiky hair isnt indication enough, the fact that he can still see Mitch over the figures head definitely is.

Tony feels his heart drop when Gregory stands between him and Mitch, posture straightened and chest puffed out. Tony can only imagine the hatred and disgust twisted on Gregorys face right now, but he has no doubt it's there. It's an expression hes seen on his face multiple times when they witness bullying.

Tony freezes, not knowing what to do. He'd thought Gregory already left for the day. Mitch stops in his tracks too, looking at Gregory almost curiously. Sure, Gregory has a reputation in school for being tough and not someone you should mess with, but picking a fight with the biggest, meanest boy in class?

Tony cant see a scenario where this ends well.

Mitch seems to recover from the initial surprise quickly, and it's not long before an evil grin spreads across his face, and he laughs. "Well, well, well. Look who decided to step in."

Despite Mitch continuing to step forward, almost circling them, Gregory doesnt falter, and all he does is match Mitchs pace with a glint in his eye.

"Decided to help your little boyfriend?" Mitch sneers, a disgusted look on his face. "Cute. But stupid. You're no match for me, you know that, right?"

Gregory shakes his head. "There are things that matter more than brute strength." He says, and latently reaches for a pocket in his bag.

Tony thinks this is one of those times where Gregory says something super deep, that Tony cant get out of his head after he hears it, but Gregory doesnt continue that sentiment with something smart, all he says is,

"Plus, I hate bullies."

It's only then that Tony can see Mitchs eyes flick for just a moment, so fast he almost missed it, but Mitch looking directly at where Gregory was reaching and then back at him is too much to ignore.

Tony's eyes blow wide, and he reaches out. "Gregory, watch ou--!"

Mitch is on Gregory before he can finish. He dives at him, almost snarling as he goes to grab Gregory's arm. Gregory startles, moving his arm away from his pocket to use Mitchs momentum against him.

If theres one thing about Mitch, it's that hes painfully predictable. Before Mitch can grab ahold of Gregory's arm, Gregory thrusts his fist directly into Mitchs gut.

Mitch keels over, stopping in his tracks to hunch over. Kids in the hallway begin to stop and watch, murmuring travelling through the hall. Before Gregory can make another move, Mitch has recovered.

"Nice try," Mitch grits out, standing back up to full height, and Tony feels his breath get caught in his throat when Gregory doesnt move to get away. "but you'll have to do more than that to--"

Before Mitch can finish, Gregory's smashing his shoe into Mitchs knee.

At this point, a crowd has begun to form, and Tony can hear some kids ooooh at the blow.

Mitch folds, left supporting himself on his knee as his other one collapses under himself. He let's out some sort of garbled shriek, and Tony cant help the laugh that bursts out of him.

Gregory uses this opportunity to reach for his pocket again, for what is unknown to Tony, but Mitch notices, and when it processes, his eyes blow wide.

In a way that couldnt be predicted, Mitch somehow recovers prematurely, using newfound sudden strength to get to his feet and lunge at Gregory. Gregory doesnt even have time to try to dodge the attack, and he makes a suprised noise when Mitch grabs his shirt, tossing him against the lockers and keeping him there with a forearm pushed against his chest.

Gregory struggles, but his arms are trapped beneath Mitchs, and he isnt letting up anytime soon. Theres a pinch in Gregory's brow, and Tony is faintly aware of himself leaving the safety of the wall to take a step towards them, worried for Gregory, even though he cant do much to help.

Mitch pants, looking enraged. Gregory squirms under his weight, and he grits his teeth.

Mitchs free arm winds back. A punch is Tony's first guess, but the way hes positioned his hand, its not to punch Gregory, no. That's easy to recognize. For some unknown reason, instead, Mitch is winding his arm to backhand Gregory.

Tony almost freezes at the shock, movement staggering, but he catches a glimpse of Gregory's eyes from behind Mitchs bulky frame.

They're staring at Mitch, no his arm, reared back above Gregorys head and trembling with unfiltered rage.

Gregorys eyes, shockingly, are swimming with pure, unadulterated terror.

Tony has never seen Gregory look this way before. Gregory is looking at Mitch like hes winding up to kill him.

Mitch takes a deep breath, arm shaking with barely held back restraint. "This'll teach you not to mess with me--"

He readies his arm to strike, and Gregory flinches and squeezes his eyes shut, trembling badly. Tony thinks this is one of the moments where Gregory looks like a little kid.

Tony sees this go down from behind Mitch, something ugly gripping his chest and clouding his thoughts.

Without thinking, and with sudden strength not even he knew he had, Tony charges forward, shouldering the side of Mitchs body enough to displace him. Mitch cries out, his shock sending him scrambling for purchase as he looses balance.

Tony doesnt stick around to see Mitch fall, but he assumes it happens if the crowd all roaring in laughter is any indication. He reaches for Gregory, a firm grip on his arm, and he bolts.

Nobody follows them. In fact, the halls are completely empty, everyone having gathered for the fight or left the school. Tony pants as he sprints, eyes scanning for a place to hide.

He slows in front of the bathroom, skidding inside and dragging Gregory with him.

Tony releases Gregory, hunching over to support himself with his hands on his knees as he catches his breath, his heart hammering.

Adrenaline is still coursing through him, and he feels himself tremble, even after his refills his lungs and his legs stop burning from the sprint.

He takes one moment to listen, and see if any footsteps are racing down the hallway, ready to chase them down, but he hears nothing.

Tony begins to relax, but unlike himself, Gregory hasnt caught his breath yet. In fact, it sounds like Gregory cant breathe at all.

Panic grips at Tonys chest again when he whirls around, and sees Gregory leaning against the wall, knees wobbling and hand clutching at his heart, breaths short and fast.

Tony freezes, not knowing what's wrong. He hovers, taking a hesitant step towards Gregory. "...Greg? Are you--"

Tony doesnt get to finish. Gregory suddenly chokes on air, knees giving in as he slides down the tiled wall onto the disgusting school bathroom floor. He scrambles backwards, as if somethings attacking him. And so unlike what Tony's seen from Gregory, he pulls his knees up to his chest, hiding his face in them.

Tony stands there like an idiot, unsure of what to do. He fights himself to move, because Gregory cant breathe and hes obviously freaking out for some reason.

Hesitantly, Tony crouches down in front of Gregory, pausing for only a moment as he wracks his brain on what to do before settling a hand on Gregory's knee.

"Gregory!" He tries to get his attention. "Hey, Greg, are you okay?"

Tony's hand reels back when Gregory startles away from him like he burned him. He flinches so violently at Tony, that he almost feels hurt.

No. Tony shakes the idea away. Its not his fault. Dont get that into your head.

Tony thinks this is one of those attacks. Where something triggers it and you feel like you're gonna die. He cant remember the name right now, but he thinks that's what's happening.

Despite knowing what it is, Tony has absolutely zero clue how to help.

Tony makes a humming noise, bouncing anxiously as his hands hover, completely useless.

Gregory chokes again, making the most upsetting noises Tony's ever heard. Gregory flinches again, even though Tony didnt touch him.

Tony doesnt know what to do. He doesnt know how to help. You can't look for clues, here. You cant piece together a picture. Theres nothing about this he can latch onto to decipher, to figure out a way to help that wont upset Gregory further.

But Gregory is panicking, and he cant breathe, and even though Tony is scared and doesnt know what to do, he cant leave Gregory to just sit there and hyperventilate without at least trying.

So he takes a deep breath, steeling himself, and Tony schooches closer to Gregory this time not touching him. "Gregory? Hey, Greg. It's me. Tony."

No response, but Tony doesnt give up. "Um. It's your friend. I'm not Mitch, or, uh, anybody like that. I don't want to hurt you. Can you look at me, please? Can you even hear me?"

Tony perks up when Gregory peeks through his knees, slightly raising his head. Tony can tell that Gregory cant really see him, even though hes looking at him, but Tony smiles anyway.

"Hey." He says to Gregory, trying to keep his voice soft. "Um. You're okay, Greg. Were just in the bathroom, so were not nearby any bullies, or adults. It's just us here, okay?" Then he whispers. "If this is even helping?"

When Gregory reacts again, it's his trembling calming a bit and his head raising slightly.

Tony is really good at recognizing change in behavior. It's what a good investigator does if he wants answers from somebody. Gotta know if they're lying, or if they perk up if they know something. So when Gregory's eyes dart towards him ever so slightly, he notices, and grins.

"Greg." He says, relieved when Gregory isnt about to hyperventilate himself into unconsciousness anymore. Hes not completely okay yet, but it's better than before. Tony reaches out, but after a moments consideration, retracts his hand, just settling on setting it in his lap. "Hey, are you seeing me now?"

Gregory's eyes widen ever so slightly. "T--" he tries, but his voice wavers so much he coughs a bit. Tony leans forward a bit, worried, but Gregory catches his breath, if not normal breathing, then hard and fast but still functional. "H-Hey."

Tony jumps at the fact that Gregory can respond to him now. He leans forward, brows furrowed and hands hovering. "Um. I need you to tell me how to help you, okay? Can you do that? I'm, uh, kinda lost here."

Gregory's breath stutters, and he squeezes his eyes shut, but he manages, "Distraction. Fuh-- Five senses."

"Five senses." Tony repeats, now determined. "Okay. Okay! Uh..." He trails off, glancing around the room. "Okay... first. Greg, whats five things you see?"

It takes some visible effort, but Gregory peels his eyes open, a bead of sweat near his hairline and brows pinched. "U-Um... You, and... the sinks."

Tony nods. "Okay. Okay keep going."

"The... the stalls." Gregory huffs out, his breathing no longer short and fast but gasping and deep. "Um... the tile, the window, an--and my knees."

Tony nods, sagging in relief at somehow helping Gregory calm down, even with his previous cluelessness, Gregory gave him a hint now, and that's all hes got. "Okay! Now four things you hear."

"...My breathing." He chuckles without humor, almost self-deprecating, but stops when it takes too much of his breath. "Um..." He takes a deep breath. "Your voice. The pipes in the wall. The birds outside."

"Three things you can feel." Tony tells him, and this time, sets a hand on his knee, gentle as can be.

Gregory doesn't flinch, thankfully, but he does take a moment to answer, loosening his tightly wound body and taking deep, several seconds long breaths. "...Kay. Your hand." He trails off, shutting his eyes. "...The gross floor, and the nasty wall."

Tony breaths out a tiny half laugh at that, and smiles knowing if Gregory's saying things like that, hes probably feeling at least a little better. "Two things you can smell."

Gregory wrinkles his nose, opening his eyes and giving him a look. "...Dont make me do that in here."

Tony laughs for real this time, and grins when Gregory is able to smile again. "Okay, sure. As long as you're okay now."

Gregory winces when he tries to move his shaky arms to sit himself up. Tony reaches forward, relieved that Gregory's no longer curled up in a ball, flinching away from Tony when he tries to help. He helps Gregory sit up, and Gregory sends him a grateful smile. "Thanks."

Theres a few moments of silence, just Gregory letting himself relax even more and getting his breathing under control. Tony glances at him, questions eating away at him. When the silence continues to stretch Tony fidgets, and the question leaves his mouth without his permission when curiosity overwhelms his sense of thinking before he speaks. "What happened? Why did you react that way when Mitch..."

He catches himself at the last second, but it's not enough. Gregory flinches at the reminder, and he averts his eyes when he gets clammy again, looking uncomfortable.

Tony frowns, scolding himself. Stupid. He thinks. He should be able to push down his curiosity just for a second to help his friends, instead of only caring about getting answers. "Sorry... I, uh..."

"Its fine." Gregory says quickly, and he gets that rigid look on his face Tony recognizes as being deep in thought, mulling something over in his head thats unknown to Tony. He takes a breath. "I... when he was gonna slap me, it just... um... reminded me of stuff that's happened to me in the past, a little. That's all."

Tony's eyes widen ever so slightly when he understands, and he curses internally, feeling guilt curl in his stomach. He never should have asked. "Oh."

Gregory looks away, almost ashamed. "Yeah." He mutters. "Sorry that you had to, uh, see that."

Tony shakes his head immediately. "Its fine, Greg." He insists, leaning forward so Gregory will look at him. "I'll never judge you for stuff like that."

Gregory just stares at him, lips parted, but then he sighs. "Okay. Thanks, Tony."

Tony smiles, then when silence stretches across the bathroom, he decides to change the subject.

"So," Tony starts. "what were you gonna take out of your bag that scared Mitch so bad?" He asks.

Despite himself, a small smirk appears on Gregory's face. "Pepper spray." He says. "I've used it on him before. He cried like a baby."

Tony snorts at the thought of Mitch, the guy who claims to be the toughest kid in school, wallowing on the floor because Gregory sprayed something in his eyes. "So that's what you meant by things other than brute strength."

"Strength means nothing if they cant even touch you." Gregory grins, enough for Tony to see his permanently missing front tooth. "Especially if they have pepper spray in their eyes. It hurts pretty bad. See?"

Suddenly, a tube of pepper spray is thrusted towards Tonys eyes, and embarrassingly, he makes a dumb little yelp and shields his eyes with his hands.

Gregory cackles at the display, and Tony removes his forearms from his face, giving him a dirty look. "Why'd you put that in my face? What if it had sprayed me!?"

Gregory wipes a tear from his eye. "To scare you." He laughs. "And it worked."

Tony shakes his head, but despite himself, he also has a smile on his face. He didnt even see Gregory reach for it, let alone take it out of his backpack.

"I need to get home soon." Tony says after a moment of laughing together, thinking of his Mom. They've probably been here for a long time even after School let out.

"Can I come over?" Gregory asks quickly, like ripping off a bandaid. When Tony looks at him, Gregory averts his eyes.

"Of course." Tony says. He wouldn't want to be alone after that, and even if Gregory could, Tonys happy to keep him company.

ao3 link

[loupy-mongoose]

Reading the ask about whether or not Akoya and Randal could have a human child did make me wonder about something else. If they were to have a human child, would their DNA be as if it came from pre-mewification Randal? Would they be genetically related to Vivi? An interesting train of thought, really. Though I wouldn't wish a human pregnancy on anyone.

I keep learning new things about pregnancy from my co-workers that dissuade me from ever having kids of my own. X3

I see Randy's human transformation as a near perfect copy of his previous human body, with the eyes being the major exception. So I would consider their hypothetical human kid genetically related to Viv, yeah.

My knowledge on the subject is shallow, though, so I could be objectively wrong. X3

[fellhellion]

“Miguel cheats on Xina and is so callous in his explanation of said act because it comes from a place of self sabotage” is one of those readings where I really like it’s implications and agree it’s plausible for Miguel to do that, but also think it’s harder to textually support.

The difference in Miguel’s reaction between Xina vs how he handles Gabriel is. Incredibly stark.

I think reading self sabotage here with Xina only really works with the cruelty of mocking Xina as she leaves or making a face at her that doesn’t seem to hint at remorse if you read that self sabotage as being either unconscious, or a deeply suppressed. Which are plausible for the character as I’ve said; but I’d argue aren’t supported within the textual presentation we are offered here into Miguel’s supposed emotional state.

Compare and contrast to the confrontation with Gabriel. Miguel is still being a dick, but it’s not the active aggravation like towards Xina, more a sense of condescending pity.

Most critically, you have the time to taken to offer small insight into Miguel feeling guilt at Gabriel trying to forgive him and retreating from that. It’s a reaction no one other than Miguel is privy to and hints at that feeling being aggravated and then suppressed. Most notably, it’s just. Not something we see replicated in his interaction with Xina.

I don’t think any of this particular reading I’m offering here negates the obvious regrets Miguel holds regarding Xina into the future of 2099 though.

Like regardless of whether you choose to read it as active disregard or an unconscious self sabotage (or both), it’s very obvious Miguel holds a lot of regret regarding tarnishing that friendship (and the unspoken love that was present there) and this manifests in one of the most notable ways through the ambiguity to his reaction to Lyla’s confession.

Like. You can essentially read quite a plurality into Miguel’s deflection/bemusement here. From his deeply complicated relationship to love and self hatred, to the fact that Xina becomes retroactively intrinsic to Lyla and that aspect offering the scene a completely new dimension, tinged with palpable regret.

I think it’s entirely plausible, given the ambiguity where Miguel’s reaction comes from to argue for that being present within this scene given not only its presentation, but that guilt over Xina is something we see present in Miguel.

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

Yeah so, my Kinkuary plans didn't pan out unfortunately. I'm really sad about it because I was looking forward to getting them all done but, between irl responsibilities and slowly trying to remember how to be a person, I couldn't make it work.

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

Would nine want to clone himself?

I'll be honest with you anon. Within the canon of Sonic Prime, I don't think he would.

By the end of season 2 of Prime, he gets to see Mangey, Sails, and the apparition of Tails, and we know that by Season 3 he's developed something of an identity crisis over the whole thing (the fact that other "versions" of himself exist out there + his belief that Sonic only ever saw him as basically Tails). So I think that whether you're looking at a canon or post Sonic Prime setting, Nine could consider cloning himself for either companionship or for getting more work done. However, (if he doesn't outright fear the possibility of a "can I really be the real me??" situation) I think he'd decide instead to build a robot or machine to do whatever he needs for the sake of practicality.

To put this in a bit of perspective, we see from Nine's introduction in Prime S1 E1 that he's actively trying to be alone (and has been alone as he can be for a while). He doesn't actively pursue companionship and is closed off because he doesn't want to be hurt by making himself vulnerable like that. A lot of how he acts at this point in the story is out of the desire to never be a victim again. However, given how strongly he seeks for Sonic to join his side in The Grim later, and then also almost immediately builds a Sonic robot after breaking off his situationship with Sonic, I don't think it's a stretch to say that Nine hadn't realized how much he actually craved companionship until after Sonic was no longer a factor in his future living plans. So the identity crisis + how he clearly misses Sonic and the companionship/care he gave him × Nine's trauma and doubled down response to the idea of being vulnerable (because he does see the Sonic situation as him opening up again only to be backstabbed) = "Let's build a robot that reminds me of Sonic so I don't have to feel alone and then build more robots to perform jobs I can't"

So...yeah. Tl;dr to me Nine is more likely to build a machine/robot before he even thinks about cloning himself (for the sake of practicality, identity crisis reasons, and so he doesn’t have to open himself up or deal with an actual person with opinions and ideas)

Now, with that being said, I could maybe see it in an au setting. If you're trying to be as practical and close to character as possible, I think one would have to come up with a situation in which cloning himself would be Nine's only option or the most practical option. And, in general, I love watching him suffer over his identity crisis, so I think a story in which he makes clones with himself and deals with the consequences could be interesting. Or (if it's your thing) I think a story where he ends up learning how to care for himself via all the clones and their problems and them learning to coexist and collaborate could also be both sweet and interesting (although that is also something one could do in an au with him and other Prime!Tails variants as well).

In any case, thanks for the ask anon!!😊

[blinkbones]

Nana, Émile Zola

Finally getting some French lit in. To be completely honest, I've had this book for almost a decade, and I never read it. Well, actually, apparently I tried at some point, because I found some underlined bits very early on -- but it's clear that I gave up. I remember struggling with it back then. I didn't, this time. It's nice to see proof of my improvement, although I'm not sure what specific skill is concerned.

For a quick & anachronistic summary, it's the story of a 19th century escort girl who makes it big in paris.

I was actually surprised by how easy to read this was. I kind of expected very difficult language. It is poetic, but not actually difficult. The text is easy to follow, almost journalistic. Poetic journalism.

I really, really enjoyed Nana. It's a long ride, and what a ride. It reads, at times, like a soap opera, with how she has a roster of desperate men orbiting around her. She really is the sun of her novel -- and it is her novel. I entered this book ignorantly (despite being French and a ~lit student, I'm not actually well-versed in my country's literature) and it kept surprising me. Where I expected a moralizing tale, or at least a pessimistic outlook on the arrogant seductress, I got the unstoppable, inescapable success of Nana. It's almost a power fantasy, although I doubt Zola saw it through this angle. I mean, it does end badly. Spoilers, but she fully dies in a disfiguring manner. And there is this underlying theme of Nana, the beautiful Venus from the lower classes, bringing the rot of the sewers to the silk sheets of the aristocracy. She all but ruins the entire upper class with the raw power of her sex-appeal, and I thought that there was something cosmic about it. By the time she's at her apex, she herself does not have control of her situation. She becomes like an empire, constantly conquering further reaches to maintain peace and prosperity throughout her imperial reign. She devours. And yet she's so incredibly human. She felt to me like a deity unaware of its power, and, in that sense, her death (especially because it's in the full bloom of her youth and legendary status) felt more like a shedding of the mortal form. Admittedly, I also just find it more fun to interpret it that way. I'm reading for fun, after all. Ah, the specter of academic seriousness hangs over me.

I think Nana is an easy entry point into that sort of literature. Yes, it's part of some long-ass series, but no, you don't need to read the previous books (I didn't). It's very self-contained. It's a long, very eventful ride, through Nana's chaotic and glamorous world. It's long but it feels like going downhill on a bike, and like everything's going too fast still. And it's fucking funny.

And for you, tumblr, my beloved, yes, you will find some messy queers in there. I only talked about Nana herself here, but Nana holds a whole ensemble cast of secondary characters, many interesting women (a wealth of them, really), that are really a whole other serving of delights that I just didn't have time to talk about here. But seriously, just about every character, especially the women, is interesting.

[snailsnfriends]

I'm thinking over the ctommy finale some more and meta that's been written by myself and others in the past and the two don't necessarily add up. in the past, we've allowed tommy to make bad decisions or judgements. exile, bedrock bros and tommy's treatment of wilbur post revival are all good examples of this. tommy couldn't be held as liable for his poor actions or thought processes because he was struggling, either in the moment or as a whole. I don't think the events of the finale should be seen differently. tommy was placed in a situation where he knew that he was going to die, surrounded by people who have betrayed him or killed him in the past. he accepted his death, but it was the final option. and realistically, if he was in the right headspace to accept death, something he feared, he clearly wasn't in the right headspace at all. he knew that his friend was going to have to be the one to kill him. the one adult who was in his life with any sort of consistency was gone. it's very clear that tommy was under a lot of stress before their plan was even enacted; he was not all of a sudden better once he talked over his plan with tubbo. he was just more confident.

this isn't to say that you can't criticize the finale or be super upset with it. I agree that it wasn't all that great and was pretty cheap. I think it should've gone differently. I think tommy and tubbo deserved a happy ending. but I don't think tommy's decision to apologize to dream, or, really, his decision to apologize for all of their deaths, should be super heavily scrutinized from a character perspective. like any other time he's been under stress, he made poor decisions and judgements that would not have been made if he was under more merciful circumstances. the strain he was put under should be taken into account more when it comes to his actions during the finale.

[byanyan]

byan disappears for two days but instead of emerging strung out and skittish like usual, their hands and arms are covered in paint and ink stains and they're a little distant but hungry as hell

[lazy-toad]

I think I might be transgender

[bodywhorror]

this might just me having passing interests and passions but man...sometimes i think about how cool it would be to be able to make a career in the practical special effects world