#just. sit by the sand n watch the waves. lose myself in the sight n the sound n | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hxseok-honee · 3 years

Text

atlas heart || part 28

a/n : aha,,, ahaha,,,,, listen, i know this is a jimin au okay I KNOW -- but this chapter belongs to jung hoseok and thats that im sorry

previous | next

tag list!! [closed]

@deepseavibez @siredjoonie @kawaii-desv @knadiuniverse @anxious-reading @catbugsugarpea @cahowlkook @amoreguk @taekookandyoongi @nogitsune-sama @whitetshirtsrus @gustavkonrad @lilacdreams-00 @seungkwanismyaesthetic @mochiteddybear @cosmicdaylight @helpitskpop @lovetootie2x @unnoticeableparadox @applejuice218 @amicalostgirl @bad-idea-personified @moralita76 @yoongiscrackhead @thebleuprince @jooniesmind @incredibleella @missbowkimjinju @marifujioka @evil-ian @uqhgood @milky-way-bitch @yellohoshi @agust-suck-my-d @okaysoplshelpme @cutehoshii @dreamcatcherjiah @butterflylion @thesunisup-theskyisblue @thealexalcala @yoonjibby @baepsaekid @surviving-in-neverland @blaisezabini @melswolf @michiiedreamer @minimochimin @ebeanz @bts-bambi @sleepyje0n

_______________________________

When Y/n finds Jimin down by the lake, she feels that every fiber of her being wants her to turn back, wants her to run and hide under her blankets -- as if she’s the one that needs protecting from him. He doesn’t see her until she’s a few feet away, approaching him from the shoreline. The smile he gives her when he turns is kind but reserved, like he’s preoccupied. She lets out an awkward laugh.

“Why did you want to meet down here in the middle of the night? Way to be weird, Jimin.” He rolls his eyes playfully, nudging her with his elbow before gesturing back toward the ground not far away, covered in grass instead of the sand here by the water. Y/n follows him there, taking a seat next to him with question marks in her eyes when he doesn’t answer her. He snickers at her confusion.

“You’re really stuck on this, huh? Maybe I just wanted to look at the stars with you.” Her features scrunch up cutely as she reacts to his admittedly cheesy one-liner, and he feels the tips of his ears go red. “Okay, I swear that sounded better in my head.” She grins before turning away, looking up at the sky in contemplation. Jimin thinks that maybe, in other circumstances, they really would have been able to sit here together in peaceful silence and watched the stars all night long. He hates that he has to ruin it.

“I actually… I have to talk to you.” She doesn’t pull her gaze from the sky, but he does notice that her expression has clouded over with something he can’t place. It looks a lot like resignation. Swallowing once and trying to shake out his nervous limbs as subtly as possible, he takes a single deep breath before turning his upper body to face her. She still won’t look at him.

“I know you’re probably going to hate my guts after this, and I completely deserve that because I’m selfish and stupid, and I’m too nosy for my own good, and I never should have pushed so much, but I--”

“I know.”

“Yeah, I know you know that I’m an idiot, and that I’m annoying, and that I ask too many questi--”

“Jimin, I know.” He stops then, and the look of pure confusion he gives her breaks her heart. She has no idea that the pained expression she’s giving him is breaking his. She can’t even keep her eyes on him when she continues. “I know that you know.”

Jimin jaw drops, and he gets the idea that he looks a bit like a dying fish, closing and opening his mouth as he tries to figure out how to continue. He hadn’t planned for this turn of events when he’d practiced the conversation in his head.

“You -- but how? Was I too obvious?” He sits up straight, terrified that his suspicious behavior had already gotten her into more danger. “Did I do something that risked your secret? What was it? Tell me so I can make sure never to do it again--” Y/n’s eyes shut as she sighs, and she quiets him with a shake of her head.

“Dumbledore told me, the day after you’d gone to see him. He wanted to warn me.” Jimin stares at the side of her head, processing that she’d known almost two weeks that he’d figured everything out, but she hadn’t confronted him about it. “I haven’t told the boys yet, but I’ve been freaking out about it. I wanted to talk to you right away, but… I decided to wait until you were ready to talk about it…” Her eyes flick to him, but at the sight of his gaze fixed completely on her, his attention fully hers, she looks away. “I was scared that you hated me. Even when you kept reaching out and talking to me, I felt like… maybe you hadn’t realized exactly what I am or what that means. I was waiting for you to leave me. Or expose me. I don’t know. I feel like I’m losing my mind.”

“I would never do that to you.” It falls out his mouth, feeling oddly like a confession when he says it without thinking and is immediately embarrassed. He clears his throat when she looks up at him with wide eyes, scratching awkwardly at his collarbone. “I needed time to process… not that you’re a werewolf, but that I had been such a fucking idiot the entire time. I should have listened to your friends and just let you be. I was nosy and selfish and objectively really annoying, and I hadn’t even realized that they were just trying to keep you safe by pushing me away. I’m really sorry, Y/n… for endangering you like that.”

He won’t look at her -- he can’t. But when a cold hand closes around his own, squeezing gently, he at least is able to look in her direction. She squeezes again, and, with as much courage as he’s ever had to gather at once, he lifts his eyes to meet her. She looks to be on the edge of tears, but she’s smiling at him, and it confuses him to no end.

“You’re not… mad? Because I completely understand if you are--”

“I’m not mad, Jimin. I’m kind of relieved that you know now, even if I am probably going to always be scared that one day you’ll wake up and realize that I’m a monster and run for your life.” He breathes out a laugh, knowing that she’s not joking. He just can’t imagine a version of himself, now or ever, that would look at her and see anything but the girl he’d been desperate to befriend all this time.

“I’m not going anywhere, Y/n. I want to help you, if that’s okay. I want to do anything I can to help keep you safe.” It’s then that she pulls away from him, her expression turning apprehensive. Jimin takes one look at her and assumes it must be about her friends. “I know that Hoseok and Jungkook don’t like me, but I can talk to them if you want me to! I can explain myself and make sure they know that I’m just trying to help--” She shakes her head suddenly, cutting him off with a wave of her hands. She can already tell how her conversation with them later tonight will go, dreading having to ask them to meet so she can break the news.

“No, it’s not them… I’ll handle the boys -- it’s probably better that you aren’t there when they lose their minds, so I’ll talk to them. It’s just… things are more complicated than you think. It’s not really as simple as helping me… there are things you still don’t know, and it’s not my place to tell you…” Jimin thinks back to the way Dumbledore had called the situation ‘infinitely more complicated’ than he knew, and the way Y/n’s talking right now has him going out on a limb.

“Is this… about Remus Lupin?” Y/n meets his eyes with alarm, her breath catching audibly in her throat, and Jimin knows he’s right. “He’s… like you, right? His friends are involved, too.” She gapes at him, unsure how to respond.

“How…” He looks away, rubbing at his neck uncomfortably.

“Well, the night I figured things out -- it was a few days before the full moon, so your symptoms were a little more apparent at the time. I saw him in the Great Hall the next day, and he was looking just like you… and his friends, they act a lot like Jungkook and Hoseok sometimes… it wasn’t hard to put it together.” Y/n sits there in silence, not certain if Jimin is just really observant and was hyper-aware of everything because he’d just realized such a monumental secret, or if she needs to talk to the Marauders and her own friends about being less conspicuous. Probably both. She barely hears Jimin when he starts talking again.

“Is… that what’s keeping you from letting me help? I swear I won’t say anything -- I’ll even pretend I don’t know about him. I’ll do anything.” She watches him as he starts to devolve into what’s probably the third rant in the last half hour alone, and she knows he’s desperate to prove himself to her. He doesn’t need to -- he’d made his innocence and kindness clear to her long before he’d had any idea of her affliction. It’s everything about him, really, that’s causing her so much pain. She’s scared for him.

“Jimin… are you sure this is what you want? We’re in the middle of a war… and you’re a muggleborn. If anyone were to find me out, and they link us… I don’t know what would happen to you. Everything’s so delicate and dangerous, I don’t know if I can put you in that kind of danger.” This time it’s Jimin that reaches out for her, slipping his fingers through her own and linking their hands once he has her in his hold. He looks entirely level-headed when he looks her in the eye and responds.

“I’m with you, Y/n. I’m with you.”

Y/n stares up at the entrance to Slytherin common room, a deep frown set into her features. She’d made what she’d believed to be the right choice by not having Jungkook and Hoseok in the same room when she told them about Jimin -- they have a habit of enabling each other’s worst characteristics, and the last thing she wants to deal with is two enraged boys in the middle of the night. But now that she’s here, having just left a furious Jungkook in the room of requirement, she’s not looking forward to having this conversation again.

Jungkook had been surprisingly calm when she’d broken to him that Jimin had discovered her secret, but if there’s only one thing in the world that Y/n can say with complete confidence, it’s that she knows Jeon Jungkook. The look of complete ease that he’d given her had terrified her far beyond any explosion of anger. She almost prefers that he had reacted. It had taken her the better half of an hour to calm him down, only feeling comfortable texting Hoseok that she was on her way to him when she’d seen an emotion cross Jungkook’s eyes other than blank detachment. Even then, it was only annoyance at the fact that she refused to let him “talk” to Jimin on his own.

Now, it’s almost 3am, and Y/n’s only brushing away her tragic attempt at reasoning with Jungkook when the door to the Slytherin common room slides open, revealing a sleepy-eyed, bedhead-ridden Hoseok. He’s only half-dressed, clearly unable to be bothered to care about his appearance this late at night. He scratches at his bare collarbone with one finger while he squints at her, his blatant concern hidden slightly by how disgruntled he looks.

“Do you have any idea what time it is? Why would you do this to me?” Y/n snorts, knowing from experience how objectively rude Hoseok can be in the first few minutes of being awake. She hopes he stays bogged down by his sleep-deprived mind long enough that he doesn’t completely lose it when she talks to him. She glances past him into the common room before responding.

“Is there somewhere we can talk in private? I have something to tell you.” Immediately, the sleep is gone from Hoseok’s eyes, and Y/n mourns the hope that he wouldn’t be clear-minded during their conversation. He nods once, pointing over his shoulder.

“My room’s fine.”

“Isn’t Yoongi there?” Hoseok shakes his head, a slight smile gracing his features while he explains.

“He got a call from Kim Seokjin not that long ago -- something about a late-night snack run and how eating alone is ‘a lonely habit’.” He shrugs, and Y/n guesses that Yoongi must get dragged out against his will by Kim Seokjin quite often if Hoseok is unbothered by it. Hoseok points again in the direction of his bedroom, and Y/n only follows with a nod.

By the time they return to his room, Hoseok’s awake enough to be self-conscious, so he’s searching for a shirt immediately, gesturing for Y/n to close the door behind her. Then he flops down onto his bed, crossing his legs and patting the spot at the end of his mattress for her. When she decides to remain standing, running her fingers along the edge of his bedpost awkwardly, Hoseok squints, suspicious.

“What happened?” Y/n closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, looking Hoseok head-on and ripping the metaphorical band-aid off.

“Jimin knows about me. He just told me. Before you say anything, we talked about it, and--”

“That little shit--” Hoseok’s standing from his bed, fists balled up in rage as he heaves out an enraged breath. “When I get my hands on that nosy, obnoxious fucking twerp--”

“Hoseok, wait! Wait.” Y/n holds her hands out in front of her, planting them on his chest while she stares up at him with wide eyes. “It’s okay! It’s fine, we talked! He’s not going to say anything to anyone, even about the stuff with Remus--” She’ll admit that saying that last part probably wasn’t her best idea, considering how Hoseok reacts, blind with fury.

“What do you mean? What does that mean?!” He’s growing louder now, and Y/n knows she has to calm him down before he wakes the entirety of Slytherin house. Taking his face in her hands, she tries to force him to focus solely on her, but it only results in Hoseok gripping at her wrists, desperation clear in the way his hold is shaking. He’s looking at her with wild eyes, demanding an explanation for something so wholly unacceptable, but Y/n can’t give that to him while he’s like this.

“Hoseok, I need you to breathe, okay? I’m okay. I will be okay. But I need you to lower your voice and breathe. Don’t think about anything else.” This display -- a total loss of control -- is what she’d expected from Jungkook, but the boy who’d been beside her their entire lives must have known better than to show his ruthless side and risk upsetting her. In this moment, Hoseok, who’s always so keen on hiding himself behind a mask, is seeing red the way he never has before, and that’s what scares Y/n most.

“Eyes on me, Hobi, hm? Look at me -- I’m right here, and I’m okay. Look at me. See? I’m perfectly fine. Nothing’s gonna happen to me, I promise.” She’d somehow managed to bring him down from his erratic high, keeping his face close until she could see in his eyes that he’s looking only at her. His breath is ragged, and if she thinks she’s caught the slightest tremble of his bottom lip when he opens his mouth, he’s hiding it well. But what he whispers to her breaks her heart clean in half.

“You can’t promise me that. The more people that know about you, the harder it is for me to trick myself into believing you.” Taking a breath to stop herself from tearing up, she releases him slowly, stepping back when he only moves to sit back down on the edge of his bed.

“Hobi… you can’t do anything to Jimin, okay? You can’t confront him or do anything rash. I mean it.” It takes a few moments, but finally Hoseok is lifting his eyes to meet hers. He nods, and Y/n knows that’s all she’ll be able to get out of him. She wishes it was enough, that weak agreement, but if there’s one other thing in the world she can say with complete confidence, it’s that she doesn’t know Hoseok quite as well as she knows Jungkook.

Jimin’s on his way to class the next morning, lost in his thoughts about Y/n -- he can’t seem to focus on anything else these days -- when he’s unceremoniously dragged by the back of his robes into an empty classroom and shoved against the nearest wall. Hissing at the pain, he barely has time to slump over and catch his breath before he’s being pinned back against the cold stone by a pair of very determined hands.

He stills completely when he finally lifts his gaze and meets the eyes of Jung Hoseok. The Slytherin is visibly furious, his glare almost manic as he pushes Jimin’s shoulders back into the wall. He only lets up when an involuntary cry of pain escapes Jimin, but he never lets the boy go.

“Now, you’re going to listen to what I have to say, and you’re going to listen closely. Yeah?” Jimin isn’t sure it’s a question that needs answering, considering that he’s literally trapped, but the increased pressure of Hoseok’s knuckles on his chest has him nodding frantically. Hoseok doesn’t release him when he leans down into his face.

“For some ungodly reason, Y/n has decided that you can be trusted, and I’m sure you loved that she said she’d talk to us so you wouldn’t have to do it yourself, huh? But I think that you deserve to have the whole picture, Park -- look at me when I’m talking to you.” Jimin had shut his eyes simply from the proximity of Hoseok’s hateful glare, unable to handle it, but when the older boy shakes him roughly, he opens his eyes so wide that he’s terrified to even blink.

“This game you’re playing? Using your obvious little crush on Y/n as an excuse to pry into her business and put her in danger just because you like sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong? It needs to stop. Because you don’t know all the rules, Jimin. And you don’t get any do-overs.” Jimin can feel the grip on his shirt starting to tremble, and at first he thinks maybe Hoseok’s so enraged that he’s actually shaking, but the glint in his eye tells Jimin differently. It tells him that Hoseok is scared -- he’s terrified. The uncertainty of Jimin’s existence in Y/n’s life -- not knowing if this is going to end badly for them -- it’s scaring him, and Jimin gets the feeling that Hoseok’s someone who deals with fear by being angry. Taking a very big risk, he whispers out to the 7th year.

“I swear, I just want to hel--agh!” Squeezing his eyes shut when Hoseok lifts him away from the wall and promptly slams him back into it, he doesn’t finish his plea. He can feel Hoseok’s breath fanning angrily over his face, and he swears a low growl rumbles from deep within the Slytherin’s chest when he responds.

“Shut up! You don’t know what that even means. You don’t know how to help. All you’ve done is screw things up for us, so let me welcome you into our little group with a warning.” A hand clamps the sides of Jimin’s jaw, lifting his face and squeezing hard until Jimin opens his eyes to look at Hoseok.

“You get one chance, so if you even come close to screwing that up, Y/n is the last thing you’ll have to worry about. Clear?” Jimin nods again, the hand on his face making that incredibly difficult. Finally, Hoseok releases him and steps back, watching with unmasked annoyance as Jimin fixes his clothes and rubs at all the spots he’s sure will be bruised by morning. They stare at each other, Hoseok eventually rolling his eyes with a sigh.

“Y/n told me you want to help. She asked me to mentor you in potion-making. I only agreed to it because she’s very stubborn when she wants to be, and someone needs to take over her doses. I won’t go easy on you, so you better be ready for a summer of hell. I need to know she’ll be safe with you once I’m gone, and frankly, I don’t even trust you to boil a pot of fucking water, much less a dangerous, highly sensitive potion.” Jimin swallows hard but doesn’t comment on the blatant insult, only processing that Jung Hoseok has agreed to train him.

Hoseok’s eyes flicker to the door, and Jimin takes that as his cue that the conversation -- if that’s what this was -- is finished, so he wanders out of the room in a slight daze, Hoseok following closely. As if the universe is telling him that this moment can, in fact, get much worse, Jimin meets the eyes of one Jeon Jungkook as the Gryffindor happens to be passing on the way to class. Where Hoseok’s glare was unbridled fire and rage, Jungkook’s gaze is turning to pure ice, and Jimin can’t decide which is worse. Jungkook doesn’t even acknowledge him as he passes, breaking eye contact and going on his way as if Jimin doesn’t even exist. Hoseok chuckles darkly behind him.

“I almost feel bad for you, Jimin. If you think you have it bad with me, you’re in for a real treat with Jungkook.”

#bts au #bts smau #bts social media au #bts hogwarts au #park jimin #jimin x reader

155 notes · View notes

xxxtrouvaillexxx · 3 years

Text

Let’s Strike a Deal

A/N: This is late, I know. If you have not realized from before, I’m really bad at meeting deadlines. Well, at least deadlines that I’ve created for myself to follow because I like to procrastinate things and frankly… what am I gonna do to myself? Band myself from tea until I’ve written a chapter? I don’t have the self control for that! And life is hectic. But you know, enough with my excuses and onto the story. Hope you enjoy. I always love feedback so please be sure to leave a comment! ALSO I wanted to give a TRY (key word) to first person. If I don’t like it... I might change it, idk. I should never write anything at 3am as per evidence below, especially without editing lmao

Pair: CEO!Tom x Reader

Synopsis: Y/N, the small town of Hawkshead girl trying to make her way in the big city of Westminster, London. Not as easy as she thought. When things start to take a turn for the worst one afternoon and only one man in the crowd of hundreds decides to help her, she does something rather uncharacteristic and gives her savor her number in case he could ever use help of his own. Course, she never expected for him to actually call her out on it.

Masterlist

Warning(s): none… yet. Cursing?

Word Count:

My time was limited. There was nothing left that had to be done here or anything left to pack. Everything I’ve ever owned sat in a car on the way to my new apartment and last of the suitcases were in the bed of my brothers pickup at this very moment while I sat on the floor of my room. There wasn’t anything left for me here, I knew that, but it was still difficult to say goodbye to the place that carried so many of my favorite memories and the imprints of my childhood that still were splayed around the surrounding room.

There were two dents in the wall right in front of me from when I was ten and hit my head after tripping on one of my toys, thumbtack holes that littered everywhere above the bed from forts that I would make with my brothers and friends, nail polish that was spilled on the carpet from times when I was too distracted with talking than keeping the bottle up straight, my engraved initials on the windowsill. The memories that I had made in this room were countless and they were all absolutely priceless.

“Y/N!” I heard your mother call from the living room, her voice was slightly hoarse from held back emotion and it broke my heart to hear her like that. “You got to get going, dear! You’ll miss your train if you wait much longer to head out.”

Taking a deep breath and slowly standing from the, now old, bed I made my way toward the door, feet dredging behind me and scuffing the floor as I walked out. “I know, Mama. I’m just-” the words caught in my throat and I was at a loss. “I’m really going to miss you guys so much.”

“Oh stop it, you’re gonna make me cry if you keep on like that,” She said giving a tight hug before pushing me out the front door. “You are going to love it in London so much you’re not even gonna be thinking about us here, so get goin’. Your brothers already waiting for you in the car.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at her antics, “I love you Mama! I’ll call you when I get there!”

Jumping into the passenger seat of the truck, I waved final goodbyes from the window, dramatically blowing kisses as the car started to drive away.

“You better!” She exclaimed, watching as we pulled out and down the road.

“She is going to be a mess when I get back home. I can’t believe you’re going to leave me to deal with that alone!” Christian, stuck driving you to the train station much to his dismay, gave you a mocking glare. “After all the things I’ve done for your, this is how you choose to repay me? I’m pretty sure I’m getting the short end of the stick here,” he laughed humorlessly.

“Ahhh~” I cooed and smiled, “You’re only saying that cause you know you guys’ are going to be missing me so much!”

“Miss you?” He scoffed, “Yeah right. What we’re going to be missing is your baking. It’ll be the greatest blow our family has faced since 1824.”

I gave a scathing look, “And what, if I may ask, happened in 1824?”

“Don’t know, but something bad probably.”

»»-——————————————-««

I have never been so sore getting off of a bus in her life. The cheapest route to get to Westminster from Hawkshead was a train and 8 bus stops, totaling up to 10 or so hours in and out of vehicles. I groaned and stretched when my feet planted on hard asphalt for the first time in what seemed like forever. But, for all the soreness, I had made it to my destination with time to spare.

It was louder than I had imagined, crowded with traffic from all directions and people running any which way to get on with their lives. It was bustling and busy. Lively. Not exactly what I was used to which made me smile.

Wide.

I made it.

I only had a suitcase with me, the rest of her belongings would be delivered in a few days to the new apartment.

My apartment.

I was positively giddy at the thought.

It took a lot of self control to keep from skipping down the side walks while I somehow navigated the new scenery, but I managed to keep my excitement under wraps for the time being. Arriving an hour early gave me a bit of time to take in the bigger sites near by, like the Ferris wheel, the clock tower Big Ben, and my personal favorite- Westminster Palace and abbey. It was a dream of mine since I was little to see it in person, and now here I was standing mere blocks away from the grand building, elated and amazed.

Vibrating caught my attention and I barely managed to turn my eyes away from the sites in front of me to my phone, Kyra’s name popping up on the screen. My best friend and now room mate, Kyra Bardou, who was probably wondering where the hell I was now.

“Hey,” I drawled with an obvious grin I couldn’t even hide in my voice.

“Hey yourself! I’ve been waiting at the stop for 15 minutes with no sign of you only to learn you’re already in town and didn’t even bother to tell me!” She spoke so quickly I was shocked she didn’t run out of breath and laughed.

“I’m site seeing, sue me!” I turned and started making the slow walk back, “I’ll be back in a couple minutes, I promise.”

She only grunted in response and let me walk in a comfortable silence, letting me continue to take everything in while simply enjoying her presence on the line. It was the last few moments I’d get now, the last bits of my old life slipping through my fingers like sand in exchange for a new one.

And the chaos that comes with a big city.

Like robbers.

I couldn’t even let out a cry as I was shoved to the ground, my phone forced from my hand and my suitcase caught up in a strange mans arms. It took me a whole 5 seconds to get my bearings enough to yell at the man and give chase, shouting for help though no one so much as looked our way, just moved out of his.

“Stop!” I screamed, running but quickly losing him as he bobbed and weaved through the crowd skillfully. “Stop! Someone stop him!”

And this time, someone moved to action, running past me at an alarming rate and quickly gaining ground on my assailant before they both rounded a corner and I lost sight of them.

My heart dropped and I picked up speed again, hoping that I didn’t let them get far enough away for me to lose them completely, it would have been easy for them to get away from me here.

But when I turned around the block, I found the man on the ground with the track star of a man on top of him, already on the phone with I assume the police. I finally caught up to them and without thinking, hugged the man on the phone, a silent thank you while he spoke to whoever was on the line, before I gathered my things and hugging them close to me.

He smiled kindly, finishing the call and turning to me properly while still pinning the thief to the ground. “Are you alright miss?”

“Yes! Thank you so much, I’d have been completely lost without this,” I gestured to my luggage. “I can’t thank you enough for helping me get it back. I don’t even know how to get around town yet.”

He laughed and nodded. “So new to town then. It was my pleasure to help, though I was really just doing what anyone in my position would do,” he responded kindly.

Furiously I shook my head, “No, you didn’t. I don’t believe I saw a single soul other than you move to help. Unless you did but beat them to it at the last minute. Not that that it implausible, you are seriously fast on your feet.”

He laughed again and I noticed what a nice laugh he had, it was contagious and I couldn’t help but let out a chuckle of my own now that my adrenaline was fading bit by bit. “Yes, well- I do enjoy the sport.”

“Dually noted,” I grinned, jumping a little when my phone started to buzz in my hands. Kyra’s name popping up on the screen again. “Shoot!” I exclaimed and answered. I wasn’t even able to put the phone to my ear before I heard her shouting my name on the line. “Kyra-”

“Oh my god, Y/N! What the heck happened, I heard you shout and then the line went dead! Are you okay? Did something happen? Where are you?” She was speaking so loudly I had to hold the phone away from my ear a safe distance as she spouted one question after another at me without reprieve.

My rescuer across from me chuckled, overhearing my frantic friend. “I’m fine, someone tried to steal my stuff on my way to meet you. Luckily someone came along and helped me catch him, otherwise I’d have lost everything. But everything is okay now, we are-” I looked around and realized I have no idea where we were.

He seemed to catch on to my newest distress and whispered, “Tell them we are on the corner of Tufton and Bennett’s Yard.”

I nodded and mouthed a thank you, “ Tufton and Bennett’s Yard,” I repeated and she said she’d be here in a 10 minutes and to sit and wait before hanging up the phone.

I slouched on the wall of some building, letting myself relax. “Not to be repetitive or anything, but thank you.”

He just shook his head, “No need. You’re friend sounded pretty worried about you, it wouldn’t do well to let her stew in that worry longer than needed.”

“Yeah, it’s been a few years since we last saw each other. She’d be pretty upset if something bad happened before I could even move in,” I laughed, though it didn’t quite sound right even to my ears. “I’m Y/N, by the way,” I introduced and stuck my hand out.

He took it and gave a firm shake, “Tom. It’s a pleasure to meet you Y/N. Even in these less than optimal circumstances.”

“The pleasure is mine, I assure you.”

“Y/N!” Someone yelled, and we both turned our heads to see Kyra sprinting full speed around her car and at me. I stood and braced myself for the collision of her, and fell back against the wall with the force of her body.

“Holy shit, girl! You scared the hell outta me, you could have died! This is why I told you to call me when you first got into town, you always manage to get yourself into trouble like this. What would I have told your parents if something happened, huh? Huh!?”

I grinned and pulled back to get a proper look at her. Her black hair, normally frizzy was sticking out in every direction and her honeyed eyes wide as she scanned me over, running her hands over my arms for injuries. “I’m fine, Kyra. I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner, you’re right.”

“I know I’m right!” She shot back with a glare, “That doesn’t make me feel any better!”

“Well, there is a first for everything after all.”

Tom laughed hard at our back and forth, making us both jump a little and look down at him. Before I could even say anything, Kyra was down on his level with the thieves shirt in her fists and a scowl that would scare the devil himself on her face.

“Is this the bastard that did this?”

“Let go!” I shrieked and pulled her off, albeit with a little effort. “Tom called the cops and they’ll deal with this properly. Not you,” I said sternly. She just let out a huff of a response and pushed herself back enough to look at Tom properly.

She gave him a once over and held her scowl in place, “So you’re the one who saved Y/N/N?”

He gave a small, hesitant nod and gave me a nervous glance. I just laughed and stood back up, as Kyra launched forward to give him a hug. “Thank you,” she murmured a few times and pulled back.

“No worries,” he said, and looked far less distressed now that Kyra didn’t look like she wanted to gut him. “I was there at the right time is all.”

“Yes, well- That doesn’t mean what you did was anything less than amazing. My whole life is in that bag and in that phone at the moment. Seriously, if there is anything I can do for you in return it’s yours. Ice cream, some roller skates, a kidney. Just ask.”

Everyone laughed at that and he nodded with an obviously sarcastic “sure”, just as the police arrived to take the culprit and our statements. Kyra mumbled something about them being slow and went to the car for a few minutes to be out of the way.

15 minutes later, everything was settled and they took the man away. Leaving Tom and I alone on the side walk again while I settled everything in my case to be sure I didn’t miss anything and quickly scribbled on a stray notecard.

“I meant it when I said I owe you one,” I said and handed the card with my name and number to him. “Just give me a ring if I can ever be of any help at all and I’ll come running. Though, probably much slower than you did.”

He tried to decline the offer only once, but after some persistence he took it with another smile, “Thank you, Y/N. Hopefully this will not be our last meeting. And hopefully never again under such pressing circumstances,” he held out his hand, and I took it, returning his earlier shake with a firm one of my own and I agreed.

“Until next time then,” he said and left.

I barely was able to take my seat in the car before Kyra grasped my arm with a devious smile, “Y/N/N- Did you just give that guy your number?” My silence was answer enough and she laughed, “Girl! No way!”

No way was right, I thought with a small smile of my own as we pulled away and started home.

»»-——————————————-««

TAGS: open

@drakesfiance @dumbgopher1 @kewlbeans-22

80 notes · View notes

onlyfreds · 4 years

Text

Sand and Sea | F.W.

Title: Sand and Sea

Requested: Yes/No

Summary: During one summer at the beach, Y/N loses a bet to Ginny. That bet leads to Y/N having to confess her feelings to Fred. Does he feel the same or was it unrequited love?

“Come on Y/N! Wake up!” Ginny said as she threw a pillow at me.

“I’m up. I’m up.” I said as I got out of bed.

“I can’t believe we’re actually going to the beach today.” Hermione said as she checked (and double checked) if we packed everything that we needed.

“And not to mention we’ll be staying there for a week.” Ginny said excitedly.

“Then what are we waiting for?” I asked as I headed to the bathroom to take a shower and change, “The beach won’t wait for us ya know.”

After I had a shower, Hermione, Ginny and I ran down the stairs to get some breakfast.

“You three took long enough.” One of my best friends (and the one who happened to be my long-time crush) Fred said with a small chuckle as I sat in between him and George.

“So, what is it to you if we took so long?” I said.

Fred tried to think of a retort but he couldn’t think of anything so I gave him a small smile and went on with breakfast.

“Take care dears!” Molly called after us as we started to leave Burrow, “Keep an eye on the twins Y/N!”

“Of course, I will!” I called back as we took the portkey to the hotel where we were going to stay at.

“So,” Hermione said to the group, “We have three rooms so there will be one trio that will stay in one room.”

“I don’t see the problem in that.” Ron said.

“You didn’t let me finish. One room only has one bed.” Hermione said.

“So, somebody has to share a bed?” Harry asked.

“Obviously.” Ginny answered.

“Okay then.” George started to say, “Harry, Ron and I will be the trio.”

Ginny smiled, “Then Hermione and I will stay in one room.”

I looked at them, “So, Fred and I will be sharing a room?”

George nodded, a satisfied smile on his face, “Yeah, and the room will be the one with one bed. Right Hermione?”

She nodded, “Yeah. If that’s alright with you two.”

Fred nodded, putting an arm around my waist, “Of course, it’s not like we haven’t shared a bed before.”

I glanced at the rest of the group, all had a cheeky smile, “Yeah. It’ll be just like the sleepovers we had.”

So, we went into our respective rooms to settle in.

“I’m just going to get my book from Hermione.” I told Fred as I went over to Hermione and Ginny’s room.

“You two planned this didn’t you?” I said as I appeared in their room.

They both gave me an innocent smile as Ginny said, “Hermione may or may not have said that one of the rooms should only have one bed.”

I plopped down on her bed, throwing a pillow at the both of them, “You little minxes!”

The two of them laughed as Hermione said, “Well, you can’t really blame us for being tired on how oblivious you two are.”

I playfully scoffed, “It’s not being oblivious Hermione, it’s called unrequited love.”

Ginny sat down next to me, resting her chin on her hand with her elbow propped up on her knee, “It’s not unrequited love. Fred is head over heels in love with you. Don’t believe me? Ask the rest of my siblings, they’ll give you the exact same answer.”

After settling in, we then headed down to the beach to go swimming.

I was wearing the red bikini that Hermione, Ginny and I got the other day when we went shopping.

“If Fred doesn’t ask you out when he sees you in that, I definitely will.” Ginny joked as I stepped out of the bathroom, wearing the bathing suit.

I threw a towel at her, “Wish I could say the same for Harry.” I said with a small smile.

She threw the towel back at me, “Don’t change the subject.”

We then headed down where the boys were waiting for us.

When they saw us, Harry was staring intently at Ginny, Ron seemed to have forgotten the conversation he was having with Harry as he couldn’t take his eyes of Hermione. Fred, on the other hand, was gaping at me, causing a blush rise up to my cheeks as his eyes raked up and down my body.

“You alright Freddie?” I asked, wiping some drool of his chin.

He seemed to snap out of his trance, “Yeah, I’m alright.”

But his words faded into the background as my eyes traveled up and down his toned torso, stepping into a trance myself.

“Hey!” I was pulled back into reality as Fred waved his hand in front of me, “You okay?” He asked, a bit concerned.

I smiled, looking up at him, “Yeah. I’m fine.”

A cheeky grin grew on his lips, “Like what you see?”

I giggled as I smacked him on the arm with the towel I was holding.

“What?” He said, feigning innocence, “I was talking about the view, what else would I be talking about?”

“Oi!” George said with a hint of annoyance, “Stop checking each other out so we can go swimming!”

“Oh, sod off you git!” Fred chastised his twin as we followed the group.

After placing our blanket down on the sand, my friends ran towards the beach, laughing like little children as they splashed each other in the water.

I sat down on the blanket, opening up a book as I started to read.

“We come all the way to the beach to go swimming and you sit down and read,” A familiar voice said, I looked up, the butterflies fluttering in my stomach as I realized that it was Fred.

“So?” I said, “Hermione also brought a book with her.”

Fred glanced behind him, where Ron and Hermione were having fun trying to create a bigger splash. “But she isn’t reading it now.”

I playfully rolled my eyes, “And I am not Hermione.”

He snatched the book from my hands, before I even got a chance to continue.

“Freddie, give it back!” I pouted as he stuck his tongue out a me.

“You can read later.” He said as he placed the book out of my reach, “For now, come swim with us?”

I stood up, crossing my arms in front of my chest, “Make me.” I challenged.

He chuckled, running a hand through his windswept hair, “You asked for it then.”

Fred suddenly picked me up, throwing me over his shoulder as he ran towards the water.

“Fred!” I squealed as he joking smacked my arse.

“What?” He asked, feigning innocence, “You did ask me too.”

He then pulled me into the water with him, soaking me from head to toe.

When I swam back towards the surface, I looked around and he was nowhere in sight.

I suddenly felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist, turning around I saw Fred, resting his chin on my shoulder.

“Gave you a heart attack baby girl?” He asked to pull my leg.

I playfully smacked his arm as I turned around to look at him, his hands still lingering on my waist.

“You’re going to be the death of me, Fred Weasley.” I muttered as I buried my head in the crook of his neck.

I lifted my head, only now being aware of the position we were in. Fred’s hand never seemed to leave my waist; my arms were around his neck to keep my balance. And my legs were on either side of his waist, straddling him.

I noticed his going from my eyes to my lips as he subconsciously licked his lips.

He leaned in slightly, me following suit. Then a huge splash of water came down on us. Fred instinctively pulling me into his chest protectively, but not being able to save me from being soaked.

“Cool down you two.” Harry teased.

“Yeah, we don’t need you two adding to the heat.” Ron added.

After a while, we called it a night, George, Ron and Harry exchanging teasing smiles as Fred and I retired to our room.

After changing into our pajamas, we settled into bed. Since the bed was a little bit small, Fred and I were cuddled together. It’s not like we haven’t done this before. We had cuddled many times before, in the common room, at the Burrow. It was basically something normal for us.

But the whole time, I was laying next to him, I tried to convince myself that we were just friends. Little did I know, Fred was trying to convince himself the same thing.

The next day, all of us were gathered around in George, Ron and Harry’s room.

“I bet you that George is going to win.” Ginny whispered to Hermione and I as we watched George and Harry play Wizard’s chess.

“Nah, I’m rooting for Harry.” I said.

“Let’s make a bet then.” Hermione suggested.

The youngest Weasley nodded in agreement, “If George wins, you have to confess your feelings to my dear brother. But if Harry wins, Hermione will confess her feelings for Ron.”

My eyes widened at her offer, but nevertheless, I accepted it, “Deal.”

Hermione and Ginny gave me a knowing smile as George managed to beat Harry.

“What are you waiting for?” Hermione asked, slightly pushing me towards Fred.

“Hold your horses you two.” I said, “I’ll tell him.”

“You have until midnight.” Ginny stated, “If you don’t tell him by them, we’ll do it for you.”

Nightfall seemed to fall before I could even say “Quidditch”. Before I knew it, we were sitting around the fireplace, time was ticking.

I still hadn’t figure out how to tell Fred. What if I really ruined our friendship? But I can’t risk having Ginny tell Fred herself. And the look she kept on giving me, told me that she was going to keep her promise.

“Hey.” Fred said gently as he pulled me closer to him while George was telling an embarrassing story about Ron, “Are you okay?” He asked quietly.

I slowly nodded, “Yeah, just thinking about something.”

He smiled, “Don’t worry that pretty little head of yours, princess.”

“I can tell you anything, right Freddie?” I asked, resting my head on his chest as our surroundings slowly faded in the background.

“Of course, darling.” He said, a hint of concern present in his voice.

I took a deep breath, “What if, hypothetically, I would confess to you that I had feelings for you. How would you react?”

“Hypothetically speaking, it would be a dream come true.” He said without hesitation, “Because I have been harboring feelings for you since first year and you’re just so beautiful, so brilliant, not to mention hot and sexy.” He suddenly stopped, realizing everything he just said.

“I’m sorry, I- “He tried to explain but I shut him up by crashing my lips to his.

Everyone else’s cheers could be heard in the background, it felt as if fireworks went off around. It was magical. Truly. It was like a fairytale that was able to make its way towards reality. It was our dream, our dream that finally came true.

We pulled away, breathless as we stared into each other’s eyes lovingly. He leaned forward as kissed me again briefly, then he did it again and again as I giggled.

“Be mine?” He asked, kissing me again.

I smiled, “Gladly.”

Whoops and cheers echoed through the group at my answer.

“See.” Ginny said over the noise, giving me a discreet wink, “I told you so.

𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝

@lumosandnoxwriting @wand3ringr0s3 @famdomhideout @nova-darling (If your name is crossed out, that means I can’t tag you)

#fredweasley #fred weasley fanfiction #fredweasleyimagines #fredweasleyfanfic #fred weasley fluff #fred weasley smut #fred weasley angst #fredweasleyoneshots #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley x y/n #fred weasley x you #hp imagine #hp one shot #summer #beach

187 notes · View notes

perriewinklenerdie · 3 years

Text

Married (Ethan Ramsey x MC)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x Claire Herondale

Word count: 2,4 k

Summary: Parts of Ines’s wedding told from Ethan’s perspective feat. E&C dancing, staring at each other during the wedding, basically being a married couple and everyone calling them out for it. OH3 Chapter 11 added content.

Warnings: None, it’s fluff town all the way

A/N: I feel scammed by PB. All the golden opportunities - wasted. So I fixed it.

His shoes sank a bit in the sand as he began walking towards the venue. More and more people were beginning to arrive, sounds of conversation and laughter increasing by the minute. He recognized his coworkers with ease and approached them. The first to notice him is Tobias, his eyebrow arching slightly at the sight of him.

“You came alone? Where’s Herondale?” he asked, looking over Ethan’s shoulder to search for the blonde resident.

“She helped me fix my tie, then kicked me out of our room. And refused to let me see the dress.” He explained, shrugging with a helpless laugh. Harper laughed along with him, clapping her hands gently.

“That’s wife behavior. Are you sure you two aren’t married?”

“Dude, if you two eloped, I’m not going to be working out with you anymore.” Bryce chimed in, acting as though he was offended, a serious look overtaking his face.

“Where would you- why would you- “ Ethan started stumbling over his words, realizing only after a moment that everyone was smirking at him teasingly. He huffed, fighting a blush that creeped onto his cheeks anyway. “I see. You all think you’re funny.”

“You make it too easy, Ethan.” Harper giggled, shaking her head.

“And we know we’re funny, Ethan.” His mentor put his hand on his shoulder sympathetically.

“Hilarious, even.” Baz added.

A small sound of an incoming message caused everyone to stop talking. Sienna unlocked her phone, her eyes scanning the screen.

“Claire just texted me a photo of her in a dress.”

Immediately, everyone jumped to her side, long before Ethan could even move his finger. Once he woke up from the daze, he took a step towards the young doctor that he considered his friend. Zaid stopped him in his tracks with a hand pressed to his shoulder.

“She said to not let you see the photo.”

“Why?”

Her voice rang from behind him. “I wanted to see your reaction myself.”

Ethan turned around and, at once, his breath caught in his throat. His gaze dropped to her shoes and dragged up her body slowly. The gentle flow of her skirt, pink silk that he knew for sure would almost spill through his fingers. The bodice, snug against her chest, accentuating her curves and making his male brain run wild. Careful to not linger on her chest too long – he would not get crap from their friends for this – he finally looked at her face. She was grinning smugly with a bit of a nervous spark.

He stepped up to her, resting his hand on the dip of her waist, tracing the floral patterns under his touch. With his other hand, he grasped hers in a gentle manner, raising it to press a warm kiss to her fingers.

“You’re taking my breath away.” he muttered, staring at her intensely.

“Hypoxia is dangerous, maybe I should go.” Claire teased, leaning away a fraction of an inch. He immediately pushed on her back to stop her, their personal spaces merging.

“Not having you by my side is fatal.” He dropped his voice to a low rumble, her grin melting into the soft smile. Their lips met in a slow kiss, no heat to it, just pure emotions.

They remained like that for a prolonged moment, his hands carefully pressing her to his chest. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, making their bodies move in a swaying motion.

Jackie burst their bubble. “You, lovebirds, the brides are about to arrive, cut it out.”

Ethan pressed his lips to Claire’s one last time, then leaned away. Their noses brushed against one another as their eyes met. He whispered gently. “I’ll come find you after the ceremony.”

She pecked his cheek sweetly. “Can’t wait.”

He wasn’t particularly a fan of weddings. He wasn’t invited to a lot of them, either. If combined with his dislike for big social gatherings, one would come to the conclusion that Ethan Ramsey was miserable right in that moment.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

As Ines and Angie exchange vows and talk about their love for each other, his eyes find Claire. Sitting in her chair across the aisle, she’s holding Sienna’s hand and passing her a tissue. She’s all anyone could ever ask for, and the mere sight of her makes him fall down into the void of memories.

How far he’s come as a person. A cynic that dreaded what a new year would bring along with a new batch of interns. A man that had only two people in his life that he could call friends. A man that went to the bar every night to forget the day behind him, only to go back to his empty apartment. All of that was so long ago that he barely recognized that version of himself anymore. He was so different now.

He smiled more. Laughed, even, and found that he didn’t find stupid jokes Lahela made all the time half as annoying as he once did. He didn’t spend every waking moment at work. Instead, he enjoyed his time off. Still at a bar, but not to drink away his worries. Not alone – not anymore.

Now, he had someone to come home to.

Claire shook her head as she laughed at what Zaid said and Ethan’s heartbeat quickened. They grew together as people too, and along with that, their relationship evolved.

From the night they spent together in the NICU, when her head slowly fell onto his shoulder and he couldn’t find a single cell in his body to tell him to lean away. Because he wanted her to be close. It was the first moment in which he thought that maybe this brilliant woman was meant to be more to him than just an intern – and right after that, he squashed the idea back down.

Every hold of her hand, every silent sign of support, he cherished it all. Unknowingly falling deeper for the woman that would become the center of his universe before he realized what was happening.

Their kiss in Miami would be at the forefront of his mind in his every living second until he kissed her again. Growing stronger with each time his resolve broke and their lips met, softly or with wild abandonment.

The first time he could call her his – the first time he had her to himself. He knew in that moment that he was ruined for everyone else. No one would ever make him feel that way, ever again. He knew it damn well – and yet, he still fought against it.

Absence makes heart grow fonder. He now knew it was true. Months he spent away from her, keeping her at arm’s length, taught him as much. How could he deny those words when the moment he pulled her closer to him outside his apartment and their lips touched, he felt his mind go blank and his heart stop. He vowed to never let her leave again. To never lose her.

And then he almost did.

The thought alone made his muscles spasm, and he was a millisecond away from running to her side, just to feel her warmth and hear her heartbeat. Leaving her side now, even if only for a moment, even to do their job, caused a silent voice to go off in his head. A wave of panic usually followed, staying with him until he saw her again.

Thankfully, nowadays, she was within his reach most of the time. She never asked why he sometimes needed to pull her close and just hold onto her – she knew.

He felt the corners of his lips rise on their own accord. She was radiant in every second of every day. In that moment, she was the most beautiful person there. The idea that it was him that she continuously chose to be with, day after day, only made him smile wider.

This was it for him. He found his one and only, as cliché as that sounded – he knew it for sure. Guess weddings really did make people reflect on love after all.

Ethan was very much aware of how lovestruck he must have been looking in that moment. With his eyes on Claire, he was a picture of a man in love – and he was finally ready to admit that he was. He loved her.

Almost as though she could hear his thoughts, she turned around to look at him. Their eyes met and a brilliant smile bloomed on her face. His lips moved as he mouthed the words, her smile becoming gentler.

“I’m yours.”

She mouthed it right back to him.

Music wasn’t as obnoxious as he anticipated it to be. That didn’t, of course, mean that he condoned every dance move he saw the guests do. He decided to not complain, though – it was a day to be happy, he wouldn’t bring anyone down with his opinion on their questionable choices of moves.

Currently, he was seated by the table, nursing his whiskey. Mirani twins, Tobias and Naveen sat beside him, all five men watching their colleagues party with wine glasses in their hands.

“How long, do you think, will it take for one of them to break a glass?” Baz asked, leaning out of his seat to see his friends better. Zaid grinned, taking a sip of his drink.

“Any second now. And my bet is on Varma.”

“Why?” Tobias’s face twisted in confusion as he turned towards him, intrigued. Zaid shrugged.

“Because she can.”

Ethan tuned their conversation out, choosing instead to look at his girlfriend. She danced with Sienna, laughing as they sang along to the song. Her dress moved with her, flowing through the air elegantly. He felt the urge to stand up and walk up to her.

“Ramsey, you do know you can just walk up to her instead of sitting here and pining for her, right?” Tobias snickered, punching Ethan’s shoulder playfully. He scoffed, leaning away with a hint of a burn in his cheeks.

“I’m not pining for her.”

“You are.” All four of his companions replied.

He was so distracted by their words that he failed to notice an approaching form. Her hand landed on his shoulder softly, the tips of her nails scratching the back of his neck. Knowing who it was, he leaned into her touch, breathing out deeply.

“Sorry, gentlemen, but I’m stealing him.” she mused happily, dragging her hand down his arm until her fingers tangled with his. Ethan let her pull her up, looping his arm around her waist.

“Stealing is bad, Herondale.” Tobias shot back, moving his eyebrows suggestively at the couple. Claire opened her mouth to speak, but Ethan beat her to the punch.

“She can’t steal something that’s already hers.” He grinned at them, then turned towards her. Claire’s jaw dropped in surprise at his boldness, her posture softening enough for him to pull her away from the table, smirking. Faintly, he heard Tobias’s words.

“Married. For sure.”

Ethan’s arms wrapped around her, fingers hooked onto her hipbones. She threw her arms around his neck, staring up at him with a soft smile. A slow song began playing and one look at where the DJ was situated told them who was behind this change. Ines grinned at them, giving them thumbs up and a cheeky wink.

“Is it just me, or is everyone trying to tell us something?” Claire giggled, nuzzling her nose against his jaw. He kissed her nose gently.

“So, you noticed it too?”

“Kinda hard not to. Girls said we’re acting like a married couple at least twice today.” she traced the lapel of his jacket, laughing quietly at the recognition in his eyes.

“Guys did it too.” Ethan muttered, tightening his hold on her. She laid her head on his shoulder.

“And how does that make you feel?”

He was silent for a long while. They swayed to the song, tuning out everything else. To her surprise, he didn’t tense up – nothing about his posture spelled out the doubts he once told her he had.

“Not as terrified as it did before.”

Claire leaned back to look at him. Their eyes met, tender understanding in them. Ethan leaned down, capturing her lips in a kiss, perfectly soft and not nearly deep enough. She clutched his lapel in her fist, creasing the fabric with how strong her pull was. His fingers dug into her back, skipping past the coarser material of her bodice and gripping the soft silk of her skirt. A voice in the back of his head told him to loosen up the hold or he’ll mark the fabric, but the overwhelming need he felt for her overshadowed everything else and he couldn’t bring himself to let her go.

The song ended and with it, their kiss. Foreheads pressed together, they caught their breath, standing in the middle of the dancefloor. Blissfully unaware of how much attention they gathered with their tender moment.

Ethan opened his eyes and finally allowed his mind to register the music again. Some sort of a fast tune that made people around them go mad. His girlfriend stared at him with an unspoken question, and he got the meaning perfectly well.

With a definite move, he dipped her onto the floor. She giggled, the sound breaking through the loud music to reach his ears. Ethan smirked, throwing her back into his arms. With his lips against her ear, he mused hotly.

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve.”

Her leg wrapped around his thigh, pushing their bodies closer. His voice broke off and his breath shuddered at the way their bodies clashed and the suggestive smirk she sent his way. His hand fell to her ass, all inhibitions gone.

“Ethan!” she exclaimed, laughing at the carefree smile he gave her. He moved his hand a bit, albeit begrudgingly.

“Can you blame me? You’re irresistible.” He muttered, kissing the shell of her ear. Claire hummed, then twirled out of his hold and back into it, jumping into his arms with her legs wrapped around his hips. Ethan groaned deeply in his throat, making her smirk.

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve too.”

Notes

This is a part 2 to the Mile High Club fic. As I said, PB could have made the chapter so good with all the wedding themes that I’d lose my wig. Writers apparently don’t know how to do basic research into fiction themes, but that’s okay (kinda). It just means I have more material to work with.

Round two smut is coming soon.

Thank you for reading! <3

Tagging separately

#ethan ramsey #open heart #playchoices

123 notes · View notes

wincore · 4 years

Text

summertime | wong kunhang

pairing: hendery x reader, side xiaocas

words: 4.5k

genre: childhood friends to lovers!au, first love, hs reunion, practically idiots to lovers, fluff, angst

warnings: none

a/n: warmup-ish fic. i don’t know why it’s so long either. loosely inspired by this. also hendery sweetest boy so i had to write something cute for him !!

When Wong Kunhang had hit you in the face with a volleyball coated in sand, you knew it was one way or the other with him. You were either going to fall in love with him or hate him for the rest of your life, and nothing in between.

It’s a little more complicated than that, you realize at twenty-one.

The neat asphalt is now a cool grey, not as pretty and dark as it used to be when you were in eighth grade but still clean and maintained. The stone walls on either side are certainly better off, marking the houses of the beachside town your school trip led to every goddamn year. Not that you were complaining, shining blue seawater has always been a favourite sight of yours. Kunhang was just the smiling bonus you held on to.

The road slants uphill till you can see the sunlight shimmering against the vast blue of the ocean across the horizon, dotted with the tops of palm trees and pastel buildings. It’s mostly at this point you realize that Kunhang’s been talking the entire way, and that you should nod along to add to the pretence, that you’re listening to him and not the loud drumming of your heart against your chest.

But Kunhang’s not here today. You don’t even know if he’s coming.

“Hey, (name), are you listening?” Yukhei asks, steadying the surfboard in his arms when you stop. “Are you thinking about Kunhang?”

The tone of his voice is teasing, but it’s as if you’re still thirteen, trying to come to terms with the first crush you’d ever had. Your cheeks grow hot and you scoff at him, snatching your tote bag from his arms and striding faster down the road. Kunhang can come, not come—you don’t care. For all you know, he’s enjoying his new life out there, as curious and fun-seeking as he is—was. He might even have found himself a lover, you realize as the bitter taste grows on your tongue.

Kunhang has always been special. Summer after summer, he’s only grown better at that.

Your parallel lines started growing distant somewhere in the first year of college. The daily facetime calls to describe the baffling wonders of adulthood slowly turned into weekly phone calls about the strain of assignments and projects and eventually, into faded texts you still look over on your phone. He’s just a friend, so you shouldn’t be expecting any more, right? It’s only ordinary that friends will grow apart. The city downpour that was slowly erasing his voice made you long for summer even more.

When you were twelve, Wong Kunhang had hit you in the face with a volleyball at the beach you always visited as part of the school trip. Somehow, with his weird sense and cutting enthusiasm, he’d offered the corner of his shirt to rub the sand off your face instead of a towel he’d find lying just about anywhere at the beach. (“The towels were definitely covered in sand! There’s no way beach towels aren’t sandy.”) And somehow, with your poor foresight, you’d felt an audible thump in your ribcage, the kind that only comes once. It was fitting, almost.

When you were thirteen, the thump grew into an entire orchestra. They settled in before you knew, and you realized you could neither accept them nor reject them. You suddenly couldn’t comprehend sitting beside him in class without nervously bouncing your legs, or laughing a little less enthusiastically at his jokes. You felt the turbulence of your pulse every time your hands touched as he passed you an eraser or a pen, or when his face split into a grin at you struggling to unscrew the bottle cap—it’s almost as if it were the end of the world whenever he breathed near you. You were painfully honest, so easy to see through and even Yukhei caught on to the fact that you had a thing for the weird yet lovable kid and his ridiculous smile. Kunhang, however, was probably in need of prescription glasses.

When you were sixteen, Kunhang learned how to play the drums and if anything, it made the heat bloom in your cheeks even faster. When you saw him play at the summer festival before the school trip, you wanted to stay there forever, just watch him do what he loves. Focused in the way he breathed and looking incredibly handsome for a stupid crush, you’d wanted to tell him then and there.

You’d made up your mind, or at least part of it, that this summer trip wouldn’t go to waste. Even the short-lived love of a young boy, you wanted to see it reflected in his eyes. That summer, just like every school trip, Kunhang had passed a volleyball to you in the outline of an inside joke that doesn’t get old; and you’d swallowed harshly, choking suddenly only for him to rub his hand over your back in the same gentle manner he did most everything.

When you think about it, you can’t seem to get over how much of an idiot you were back then. Kunhang was almost an even bigger one.

“I wish I’d get better at the drums quickly,” he’d said beside the campfire, tapping his foot impatiently.

It was only the two of you immersed in the night and if that weren’t reason enough for your incoherent thoughts, his knee was touching yours in a way oblivious to him—and the look of complete serenity over his face made you rethink your confession.

“You’re already good enough,” you huffed in disbelief.

“I can play two, er, three songs!” His voice was enthusiastic in the beginning but it hummed out to a mellow ending. He’d added in a determined whisper, “I need to practise so I don’t embarrass myself.”

Before you knew it, you’d let out a short laugh. Wong Kunhang, afraid of embarrassment? It was almost unheard of. You’d never met anyone so open before, so happy to share even the rougher, less tangible parts of himself.

Kunhang only gazed at you wordlessly, and when you met his eyes, the butterflies were let out of the cage in your stomach again. You wanted to lean in a little, kiss him right then and there, the image itself slowly curling around your head in haunting wisps as if something taboo. It didn’t make sense to you, to feel so immensely submerged in adolescent feelings—yet be comforted by his presence oh so easily. You know you weren’t the only one harbouring clandestine feelings. You’d seen them confess, you’d seen the few perfumed letters in his locker asking to meet after class.

Kunhang had turned down all of them. It didn't take solving quantum physics to realize he’d probably do the same to you. And you’d both end up losing a friend.

You’d swallowed whatever garbled confession that might have come out of your mouth that night. It’s better off this way, you told yourself, and you believed it for quite a while.

You wanted to hate him when you turned eighteen. You were going away to start a new life all on your own, and yet there he was, pretending that everything was going to be the same. Did he have to treat you so special? It wasn’t real, after all, the full wave of attention he gifted you, the adoring laughter and the occasional awkward head pats.

(And yet, every time you close your eyes, you wish it was.)

You wonder if Kunhang knows summer the way you do—sand against bare feet, having ice cream under a beach umbrella and most importantly, the scent of young love coating you in a thick layer of nervousness. Knowing him, he probably didn’t even notice the way you struggled to keep your wide grin secret every time he offered you the coconut flavoured ice cream. You wonder if he’s forgotten summer by now.

Yukhei catches up to you just before the narrow stone steps that end in the beach sand. You stop for a second, careful of the rock you always trip over (and the memory of Kunhang there to steady you with a laugh, unless he was the one who tripped face first into the sand) as you breathe out heavily. This is your high school reunion. You don’t have to think of your awkward teenage love right now. You can enjoy the coconut flavoured ice cream all by yourself.

You step onto the sand, taking a sharp breath at the full strength of heat that hits you. The towels and umbrellas are spread across the area, candy blue stripes everywhere your eyes visit, till your name is called by a frantic Dejun trying to get your attention. Summer feels hotter than any year you’ve visited and even sunscreen can’t protect you from the inevitably dazzling view you face.

After all this time, you thought he’d go away but the waves come crashing after all.

Kunhang has grown into a messy sort of handsome. His hair is longer since the last time you saw him, unkempt in the way it falls over his forehead yet still strangely neat. Even under the shade of the giant umbrella, there’s an unmistakable calm over his features—the look he often had on his face and no one would be able to tell what he was thinking, his own respite in broad daylight. The contrast between him and the blue around is crisp, like a sunlit field of pink tulips floating atop blue ocean water. It’s hardly been three years and he looks older, a bit more mature.

Kunhang beams when he notices you, the effect of it almost crushing as you try not to acknowledge the tidal wave of pent-up emotions.

“(name)!” he grins wide, jogging up to you. “I didn’t know you were coming. You didn’t reply to any of my texts!”

They vanished. Your words vanished again. Fidgeting with your fingers, you abruptly clear your throat before you can respond.

“Yeah. I, uh, I changed my number.” You bite your tongue softly at the lie.

He frowns. “Oh. Well, give me your new one.”

“I- I- I forgot my phone. At the- the hotel.”

You feel yourself cringing at your voice. It’s so...so embarrassing, every rise and fall. Kunhang blinks a few times before shrugging.

“Ah. I’ll get it later then.”

You almost immediately excuse yourself and beeline to Dejun sitting by the cooler, trying hard to hold a coconut larger than his hands as he raises a suspicious eyebrow at you. Of course it’s natural you’d go straight to the guy you see everyday at university instead of visiting the boy of your unrequited affections. It’s completely normal. What’s the point of a reunion anyway?

What you don’t expect is to be sandwiched between Dejun and Kunhang, the latter enthusiastically summing up each and every point of his life at university, the lack of control over facial expressions still prominent and you try not to let your heartstrings pull too hard. Dejun hums in intervals beside you, sipping at the coconut water he so struggled to get as Kunhang skilfully ignores the growing tension.

God, he really is an idiot. You feel like telling him you’ve been in love with him for eight years just so he’d shut up.

But after all this time, Kunhang has managed to remain himself. You smile. The sand in your hourglasses might not be flowing so differently after all. He’s still talking about most everything he finds fascinating through the smallest of details and you’re still willing to listen to the sound of his voice for hours. The scent of the ocean breeze that made you think of him, so you kept it safe—it’s overwhelming now.

Your vision is suddenly blocked by a pink paper cup, the spotless white ice cream in it already starting to melt. You turn your head to Kunhang trying hard not to make a face at you, biting onto the edge of an empty paper cup.

“You didn’t listen to anything I said, did you?” he asks with a click of tongue, after taking his cup in his hand.

You can’t help your sheepish laugh. “I lost you when you started talking about the campus cats.”

Kunhang scratches the back of his head, smiling. “I couldn’t get a volleyball today. They increased the rent rates by ten!”

“What, you were planning to rent a volleyball just to hit me in the face with it?”

Kunhangs face breaks into a grin, positively glowing from his eyes to the line of his nose to his lips. Maybe you don’t hate this feeling so much.

Dejun suddenly clears his throat beside you, springing up. “I’m- I’m going to go help Yukhei,” he declares, discarding his coconut somewhere over the sand.

“Help with what?” you ask, furrowing your brows.

Dejun coughs uncomfortably before shrugging and speeding off to Yukhei trying very hard to plant the wet surfboard in the sand. Somewhere in your mind, you already know the reason why he ran off.

You turn to Kunhang with a worried look, but there’s no sign of realization over his face. You almost sigh but catch yourself in the moment. Is it pitiful? He probably can’t even imagine you that way, maybe that’s why he hasn’t caught on.

Is it bad that you hate it? That you’re not satisfied with the friendly touches, the innocent smiles. You don’t want to keep it so pure after all—you want to run your hands through his hair, you want to twine your fingers through his, you want to feel the touch of a kiss with him.

Your gulp nervously once Kunhang’s features come into focus, still talking about something vague and nodding along to it at an uncertain rhythm. The sound of the waves come gently crashing, just as they do to the shore and the buzz of this place reminds you of all the time you spent here. What has been, what could have been.

“Kunhang,” you interrupt and he whips his head to you, eyes curious. You take a deep breath.

What value is there to words that you’re desperately trying to throw away?

“I- I’m going to go to the water,” you say, trying to cover up your nervousness. If it wasn’t any other summer trip, it’s not going to be today. It’s not going to be, at all.

If you can’t put it into words, will you be alone? You’re only chewing over your memories hoping they fade.

Kunhang springs up just as you stand, his sudden movement surprising you.

“I…” He begins but shakes his head with a subdued smile. His voice comes out softer than you expect. “Yukhei’s that way, if you’re looking for him.”

You blink back your confusion. “Ah, um, thanks!”

The more you try to lie to him, the less you understand yourself. But if you stay any longer, you might just spill the archived secrets, the words you should have burned in the campfire that night. You can fall out of love. It’s easy, it’s easy, you tell yourself—then why couldn’t you have done it earlier? Can you even do it now?

“What are you doing here?!” Yukhei asks, furrowing his brows as he gets up from the sand. “Where’s Kunhang?”

“I- I don’t know! Why would I know everything about him?” you grumble, hugging yourself.

“You are so stupid,” he states in response.

“That’s- That’s not something you should be telling me!”

Yukhei grabs your shoulder, shaking you hurriedly. “You should go back to him! The beach is one of the top ten romantic places, come on.”

“What makes you think I still like him?!” you hiss, trying to get his hands off your shoulders.

Yukhei stops abruptly, tilting his head to greet Dejun, who makes you jump out of your skin. You move apart from Yukhei, facing him with a sigh.

Dejun tries hard not to pull a face, notifying that your other classmates are here, and it’s a lot more likely some of them are still heart-eyed for Yukhei. The two of them seem to share an inside joke as they laugh and you raise an eyebrow, not even bothering to decode the situation.

The brunch idea was probably Dejun’s, considering how smoothly things run. The whole renting out half a bar idea was probably Yukhei’s, considering how much of a wild mess it is. The place is perfectly snug, warm and just enough for a former high school batch, right by the beach where the sand meets asphalt. The laughter and conversations overpower the low jazz undertones of the music playing through the speakers and you find yourself smiling when someone or the other reminds you of all the high school ventures you’d had under the teachers’ disapproving eyes.

“Remember when Yukhei stole the rabbit from our school garden?”

“That wasn’t even worse than when he accidentally fired the water hose at Mr. Liang!”

“Oh my god, you remember putting on makeup in between classes without getting caught?”

“Or trying to steal lunch from me, you big bully?”

Really, seeing old faces after so long and then the same faces hammered only a few hours later might just be another one of the ‘fun’ things you’ve been missing out on.

There’s Shuhui, Lunmei and Linlin—girls you didn’t get to talk much with during school, but you remember Shuhui’s face from middle school. There’s Yukhei’s friends, Shihao and Taishun, who you think you exchanged a whopping total of sixteen words with throughout high school. Yet now, with everyone gathered here, it feels like some sort of a haven of reminiscence, like you’d known each other all your life (which, to an extent, you did). It’s comfortable and warm, the blanket of old connections.

You take another sip of the punch. It’s not enough to get you drunk but it's enough to shift the gears in your ribs to begin the steam engine you can’t find the brakes on. Your face is hot, Kunhang finally not the reason behind it, and you sigh as you glance around the room slowly.

It would’ve been quieter if Yukhei somehow hadn’t started this chain of confessions. Dejun is still struggling to keep him seated, a warm blush over his face when he has to wrap his arm around Yukhei yet again while the others continue chanting “confess! confess!” to the next unlucky victim guilty of harbouring an unspoken teenage crush.

You shake your head at the whole scene, sighing once again as you lazily swirl the remnants of your drink in the glass. The night will be over soon, and you’ll go back to your own paths. For now, you can pretend it’s all just another summer adventure.

Yukhei clears his throat, everyone’s eyes turning to him instantly. “I’m sure there’s one more confession left!”

There’s a bunch of cheers and you feel your heartbeat quicken when Yukhei shoots you a knowing smile. Your eyes widen, your throat suddenly feeling dry and you turn your head to meet Kunhang’s eyes. He looks at you with no hint or clue about the reality and you look away before it fries your nerves out.

“You’re going to thank me after this, Kunhang,” Yukhei calls, a teasing lilt to his voice and the boy in question simply shakes his head, grinning in polite confusion.

You look around in panic, from Yukhei to Kunhang and wonder if you should open your mouth. You take a breath before a roar of cheers interrupts you.

Shuhui stands up, rosy-cheeked and wobbling at the knees. You catch Yukhei blinking with furrowed eyebrows but nodding anyway, as if the decisive president in a heated debate.

“Wong Kunhang!” she calls before coyly confessing. “I like you! I’ve liked you since eighth grade!”

Is it the alcohol? Or the cruel realization that your mother was right when she said summer makes people fall in love? There’s another round of cheers and applause as you get up discreetly, sneaking out the door a few steps behind you. You don’t think you can stomach the sight of someone else’s arms around Kunhang, his loving attention drawn to them.

The night air is cool, the bushes lining the sidewalk buzzing with cicadas as you step over onto the soft, warm sand. The campfire has been reduced to blazing embers, no one there to kindle it as the night progressed. You hug yourself as you walk, the calm over you strange, uncharacteristic.

Even if it’s not you and him after all, you should have said something. You’re only a coward, slow and naive in a world too fast-paced, unable to face a reality that’s your own. You couldn’t even stay in that room a second longer. If only your chest didn’t waver so easily, your heartbeat didn't grow erratic.

You walk closer to the water, waves lapping quietly against the sand, a hush over them as if they do not know what to say to you. What do you say to someone on the verge of heartbreak? Consoling your friends at university taught you next to nothing, your own seeming beyond your help.

“(name)!”

You feel your breath hitch, hesitant in turning around. There’s a moment’s pause and when you don’t turn, Kunhang tugs at your wrist, pulling you to him.

It’s getting so that your heart can’t even flutter anymore.

Gentle and kind, and so willing to give, Kunhang could never really leave you alone, could he? He looks at you with wide eyes, almost like a puppy lost on the streets. His pale pink overshirt is hanging loosely over his shoulders, unbuttoned all the way over his white T-shirt, his hair tousled by the wind and words yet resting on his lips. You forget to breathe for a few seconds and when you inhale sharply, the onslaught of your feelings comes toppling over you.

“I hate this,” you choke on the words. “You should be in there.”

“They’re still celebrating. And drunk.” He shifts nervously.

“I hate you,” you say, not finding meaning in the words. “I hate you so much because of how stupid I was- how weak I was.”

Kunhang’s eyes shimmer with something unfamiliar, lips quivering before he steadies himself, drawing nearer.

“That’s not fair,” he whispers, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down.

You purse your lips. It isn't fair—who are you to blame him? He doesn’t deserve the vomit of emotions from your popped balloon of a heart. You bite your tongue before you can spit out the poison-infused words.

“I’m sorry,” you whimper, voice hoarse and still angry, “I wish I told you earlier. How much I liked you. How much I wanted to be with you.”

Kunhang stays quiet, hand not ready to leave your wrist yet, the part where his thumb rests searing hot.

“I thought I could pretend I never liked you at all,” you say, biting your lip. “I thought that if I faked it then it would go away but Wong Kunhang, I- I’ve liked you for so long that I don’t know what it’s like if I don’t.”

Why are you crying? It’s like the emotions you’ve hoarded all these years have somehow found an opening to burst through, in a stream of colours that paint you in embarrassment. You feel the blood rush to your cheeks and nose, as you vigorously rub at your eyes so the tears don’t escape in so obvious a manner.

“I- I tried going on dates, I tried- I tried all those stupid blind dating apps, I tried to focus on my major and making new friends and- and still…”

Doesn’t the rain fall in times like these? Yet there’s only the hot blanket of summer, with its swaying sea wind and calling cicadas resting in the vibrant bushes.

“I didn’t want to force all of this on you. I’m so—”

It’s only fitting that the stupidest sequence of words would leave his lips.

“I thought you liked Yukhei,” he says quietly.

You pause, uncertain of what to do and breathe out in annoyance. “Kunhang, for the love of god, where did you even come up with that?”

His cheeks colour ever so slightly and he clears his throat. “I don’t kno- I just- I kept giving myself excuses too. I’m sorry.”

The wind makes his hair sway lightly by his eyes, the stars glowing cool blue in them. Whatever the ebb and flow of your feelings were, they’re crashing against the sand, violent and sorrowful at first till the moon tames them into something warmer.

And then it happens again. Kunhang smiles, shoulders relaxing. There’s a moment’s pause.

“I- I’m not good with this.”

When Kunhang presses his hand against your jaw and leans in a little, eyes waiting for confirmation, the drumming in your veins is so loud you can barely comprehend the movement of his actions. You shut your eyes almost instantly but Kunhang accidentally bumps your noses a little too hard. The two of your wince, your hand flying to your nose as a muffled cry of pain escapes your lips and he looks at you worriedly, his fingertips pressing against your cheek softly.

You choke back a laugh but it bubbles up anyway, his own following after an embarrassed pause.

“I think- I think I was a little nervous,” he admits, looking down and then back up to you.

“We can...we can try that again,” you hum, biting back a smile.

Kunhang’s hair is in fact softer than you’d expected, and when you run your fingers through them, he smiles into the kiss, his hand at the small of your back pulling you closer. Nothing’s like you daydreamed of and yet everything is in place, the shared warmth growing with each passing second.

It’s blissful for a few moments before you’re interrupted by a drunk Yukhei to “get it” and you jump apart from each other, flushed hot in the cheeks. Dejun apologizes for his boyfriend, waving at you guys to continue whatever the hell you were doing before tugging Yukhei along with him.

You clear your throat awkwardly before plopping down on the sand, face buried in your hands. Kunhang follows slowly, legs outstretched towards the ocean. You peek to see him smiling at the sky, leaning back on his hands and the look you love seeing on him.

“Kunhang?”

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t- I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. Even if you didn’t like me back then.”

Kunhang turns his head to you, eyes earnest as they trail across your face.

“You don’t have to be brave.”

He reaches out to fix the hair from your eyes, a gentle touch to them as ever, but this time there’s a stronger meaning to it, almost as if he’d kiss you again right then. The two of you smile, twining your fingers somewhere along the night as he tells you to rest your head on his shoulder. The waves sing softly to accompany Kunhang’s chatter, the feeling almost unreal when you feel his pulse against your thumb.

What has been, what could’ve been—they’re barely a breeze to what really is.

#wayv #hendery #wayv scenarios #hendery scenarios #nct scenarios #hendery fluff #hendery imagines #wayv imagines #nct imagines #wayv fluff #nct fluff #wong kunhang imagines #childhood friends to lovers!au #hendery x reader #yes im back with another cheesy as shit fic what are you going to do #moonwrites

529 notes · View notes

thran-duils · 3 years

Text

From All Sides (P.4)

Title: From All Sides (Part Four) Summary: Fem!Reader x Dark!Pirate Tony. Tony is obsessed with a certain barmaid at port and showers her with gifts to try to bring her to his bed. She is resistant to his advances, her eyes elsewhere, specifically on her coworker, the cook. Although, that love is unrequited and always will be. The reader is forced into close quarters with Tony unexpectedly and sailing the sea, she slowly bends to his will. And he plans to give her all the affection he can to make sure she stays. Words: 2,420 Warnings (for the whole fic): Eventual smut, violence, angst, possessive behavior Warnings (for this chapter): Tony displays some homophobia

Part Three || Part Five || Masterpost (mobile) || Fanfic masterpost

He was right, your head hurt the next morning. He tried to shake you awake and you whined, pulling the blanket over your head. Tony chuckled which only served to make you more upset about feeling sick.

Tony laid a soft kiss on your temple through the blanket, and said, “I’ll leave you be then, love. I will make sure some water is sent in. And some bread. Don’t leave the quarters without me. I don’t want you getting snatched up. Without me, you’ll look like fair game.”

You grumbled in response, and he gave you another kiss through the blanket before crawling out of bed.

<><><>

Walking down the dock towards the stairs to go up into the kitchens, Tony was greeted with Bucky and Steve sitting. He altered course and came out onto the overlook with them. Steve held out a piece of bread and Tony waved him off.

“I was heading in to get myself breakfast. And Y/N some bread.”

“So, she’s not feeling great?” Bucky questioned, taking a swig of water from his mug.

“No.”

“And did you…” Steve asked expectantly, trailing off. His raised brows indicated exactly what he was asking.

Tony sighed and shrugged, “Persistence pays off.”

“Jesus Christ, finally. Now you can stop whining about her going to bed alone,” Steve muttered, taking a big bite of his potatoes. “Even if it was only for a night that she obliged you.”

“Watch it,” Tony muttered, and Steve merely shrugged in response.

“She’s finnicky.”

“Not anymore,” Tony responded.

Bucky rose his brows, “At least you hope so.”

“I’ll make sure of it. She’s going to stay on the ship with me.” Steve and Bucky exchanged a look and Tony demanded, “What?”

“The men may not like that…” Bucky pointed out.

Tony waved them off, “They’ll get used to it. She’ll be a sight for sore eyes. Not that any of them will be allowed to touch her but I won’t toss anyone overboard for merely looking at her. In fact, I’ll be happy she is being admired and knowing she is mine.”

“Unless she gets back home and finds that guy,” Bucky commented, and Steve shot him a pissed off look at the mention of him. Bucky noticed both Tony and Steve glaring at him and he demanded, “What? You know it’s true! He was pining! And—”

“And what?” Tony snapped.

Bucky seemed to lose a little bit of steam seeing how adversarial Tony was. “Well, he seemed persistent.”

Grinding his teeth, Tony stepped closer, and he said, “That’s not a problem anymore.” Bucky furrowed his brow and Tony said in explanation as he pulled out his pipe, “Boy isn’t among the living anymore.

Realization washed across Bucky’s face.

“Why did you kill him?” Bucky asked, incredulous.

“I didn’t want him alive,” Tony responded simply, striking up his match.

“That’s fair,” Steve said.

“How is that fair?” Bucky snapped. “What if Y/N finds out? Or Peter for that matter? They were friends!”

“They won’t? Who is going to tell them? Dead men tell no tales,” Tony responded, lighting up his pipe.

“You didn’t have to shoot him,” Bucky muttered.

“Who says I shot him?” Tony asked, cocking an eyebrow and Bucky merely narrowed his eyes unimpressed. Tony smirked around his pipe before inhaling deeply. He blew the smoke rings out and shrugged. “I see smooth sailing in front of me because of that gunshot.”

<><><>

The ship stayed docked and you only left the room on the island to go grab food in the evening. You barely kept the stew down and Tony rubbed your back. You scowled at him, and he only smirked before going back to his own bowl. That night, he left you alone, letting you rest.

The next morning you woke up to him holding you close underneath the blankets. He felt you stir and he burrowed his mouth to your neck, kissing you gently. You smiled as you stretched before pressing back on him. He took the invitation and ground himself into your ass.

“If you’re going to do something, do it. Don’t tease,” you murmured, turning your head to meet his eyes. A salacious grin came over his face.

Tony lifted your leg and entered swiftly, leaving the two of you breathless and dozing off to sleep again for the second time.

Later in the day, you woke up and found the bed empty. You sat up, the blanket falling to your waist as you searched the room groggily. He was not there. You got yourself ready quickly and left the room, despite his warning yesterday not to.

Thankfully, you found Bucky before anyone else and he intercepted you.

“He’s fishing.”

“Fishing?” you asked disbelieving.

Bucky nodded, “He enjoys it. Plus, it helps feed the island.”

“Anything to keep his feet off the land,” you commented in a sigh, as your eyes were drawn out towards the water.

Bucky gave your shoulder a squeeze and said, “You’ll like it later when you get some bass to eat later, yeah? I’m sure he’ll bring one specifically for you.”

<><><>

You accepted Tony’s offer for a dinner on the beach. As Bucky predicted, Tony had brought a fish specifically back for you and he was roasting it over the firepit on the sand. He had brought a bottle with him, and you having recovered, you were indulging again. The fish was good and filled you up along with the vegetables he had used in the pan as well.

Sitting on the log, you stared into the fire. Tony passed you the bottle and you took a long swig.

“I believe I was promised earrings if I came to your cabin,” you commented lightly.

Tony laughed at that and said, “I know where they are.”

“Do you?”

“Yes, they’re locked away. I was saving them.”

“For?” you pressed, passing the bottle back to him.

He shrugged, “Like I told you. You had to come to my cabin to get them.”

“Well, I have done that. Were there strings attached that you did not inform me of? I still have the necklace on!” you asked, smiling. You showed him, pulling it out from your dress. You knew he had seen it. Of course he had. He had taken you in his bed with it twice now, the one thing you had not taken off to lay with him.

Tony shrugged again. “Stay. And I’ll give them to you on our wedding day.”

You laughed but then saw he was looking at you offended. Oh. He was serious.

Brushing the intensity of the moment off, you exhaled deeply, dramatically. “Well, when we see fit to settle down, I suppose I’ll get them.”

Tony said nothing and you hated the uncomfortable silence. You cleared your throat and scooted closer, getting his attention.

“We should go back. Back to my home. So… I can see.”

Tony was unconvinced from the mention of it. Shaking his head, he said, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“I can handle it. Whatever happened.”

“I don’t think it is wise.”

“It matters not what it wise. It’s what I want.”

Tony was adamant, “No.”

You scooted away from him, and he noticed that. His eyes followed your movement and saw your hands planted firmly as you glowered at him. Good. He could see how serious you were about this.

“So, you’re refusing to take me back?”

“You escaped there. You were held down there,” Tony argued. “You don’t… need to go back.”

You straightened up and asked, “’Escaped’? I liked it there!”

Tony was accusative now, aggressive. “Do you want to go back for him?”

“Who?”

“Adam.”

You stared him down, matching his fiery gaze.

“That’s what your afraid of? Competition?” Disgust washed across his features and you pressed on before he could interrupt. “No, Tony. It’s not for him.”

“Then what for?”

It was either the liquid courage or wanting to be honest, or possibly a combination of both, but you were honest. “Eloise.”

It felt good to proclaim she was worth something. Even to someone as jealous of your affection like him. With him, the impact would be different. You hoped. If you proclaimed your love for Eloise to him, it was safer than anyone else. And he understood desire. Hell, he had been trying for you for so long. To return to port just for one person, he had to understand that.

But immediately you saw it had been lost on him and now you were to be floundering until you explicitly explained it.

“You’re worried she got taken?” Tony asked, trying to understand. That only made it clear he was clueless about your unrequited love.

Tears stung your eyes, and you squeezed your hands between your thighs. The waves crashed, filling the space between before you inhaled sharply and said, “I mean, yes. That is a very big concern. She could have been harmed. Taken… raped.” You met his gaze, and he was waiting, like he sensed you needed to say more. And you did. You swallowed and whispered, “I loved her. So much. And I knew she was never going to love me back. But it was okay pretending.”

Tony looked like he had been slapped. And that is when you realized you had made a mistake in confessing this to him. He would not be understanding like you hoped he would have been. Why did you think that?

Still you tried to play it off, using emotion.

You shrugged in return, bringing a hand up to wipe at your eyes. “It was at home at port. We worked together. We were close… I dreaded the day some man would come steal her away.”

Still Tony said nothing, and you turned your eyes to him. He was staring at you with such intensity, frozen in the moment. But only for so long.

“So, she was the reason,” Tony finally said. You furrowed your brow at his tone. He took another swig of his rum. He suddenly gave a scornful laugh, shaking his head. “The whole time, I thought it was all those men chasing after you. That you liked playing games—” Your mouth fell open at that remark in shock. “—And keeping your options open. But you already had your heart set. On a woman, no less.”

You shifted and said desperately, “I did not think you would judge—"

Tony cut in swiftly, roughly. His tone could cut glass.

“And on someone who would never appease you or return the affection. You set yourself to doom. And for what? So, both of us could suffer?”

You realized he was making this about him and his feelings. And that ignited anger quickly. “Tony, that’s not fair!”

“I never stood a chance if you were already dead set on staying sorrowful forever.” He scoffed, standing up, your eyes following him. He stared down at you, stumbling a little in his movement as he threw an arm out. “Looks like we had both anchored ourselves to misery and unfortunately for me, it was unknowingly because you returned my flirtations constantly. Dragged me along.” He pointed at you and sneered, “You’re selfish!”

You stood up with him and you said forcibly, “I am not! Yes, I flirted back because I do like you! But do you think I wanted to hang my hat on someone who was notorious for sleeping around?” Tony gave you an incredulous look, but you pressed on. “And for someone who spent most of his time at sea? What? You just wanted me to wait around for you whenever you thought it appropriate to grace me with your presence?”

Tony stepped closer, a finger in your face. “If you would have given yourself to me, I would have brought you aboard or made home—”

You interrupted with a shrill laugh and his jaw set in offense. “You? Make home? Don’t make me laugh.”

“For you? Yes! I would have!”

“Will you now?” you asked, still lightly laughing.

Tony was serious when he said, “If you would only ask it.”

You shrugged sheepishly. “I will not.” He scoffed and began to turn away, but you raised your voice, catching his attention again. “Because as heartfelt as you feel right now – and it may be genuine – you would get bored. You’re married to the sea. You would never be married to me.” You gestured between the two of you. “You and I are meant for the bed and that’s it. There won’t be long term affection. At least on your end.”

“So, I’m the problem?” Tony snapped. You nodded and he bit his cheeks, turning away from you. He used his arm holding the bottle to wipe at his mouth, staring out at the ocean. You swayed on the spot, feeling the alcohol running through your veins. When he turned around again, he almost lost his footing in the sand and you moved to steady him, but he waved you off, stopping you in your tracks. “You never even gave me a chance to prove myself, Y/N! I’m so glad you’re such an expert on what you think you know about me when you never cared to even ask! I would kill you for! I did kill for you! Or have you forgotten that? Or do you just not care?”

He got even closer, and his breath was hot. “I would kill hundreds of men to keep you safe. Just to make sure you were there for me at the end of that bloody trail! And you’re so fucking ungrateful about it! I should just leave you here. Let you simmer on that! Be passed around between the pirates coming through! Cause you obviously don’t give a shit about who you open your legs to! Might as well get paid for it! And at least I’ll still know where to find you. I’ll have coin ready!” He leaned in close and hissed, “If you won’t have me fully, then I’ll just keep you at another port to visit just like before!”

You gasped, hurt, as he turned away from you. He left as quickly as he could, trudging through the sand until he found the rocks again.

“Drew me in and drowned me! Temptress! This whole damn time! And here I thought sirens were only on the sea!” he shouted over his shoulder.

All that was left was the sound of waves as you watched him go up the path.

~~~

Marvel tags: @coconutqueen21 @undecidedsworld @holl2712 @agustdowney @biiskuitx @buttercupfangirl

#tony stark x reader #dark tony stark #dark!tony stark #dark marvel #my shit

26 notes · View notes

maria-scribbles · 4 years

Text

loyalty’s all i got | part two

three years ago, you had it all: great friends, good grades, and an almost perfect relationship with your boyfriend, jj. it all came crashing down when your mom relocated your family to california for work and you were forced to trade the outer banks for malibu, leaving your broken heart behind in the place you were just starting to think of as home. now you're back in town for college and to pick up the pieces, hoping to make things right again with your friends and the boy you never stopped loving.

word count: 8.6k+

ship: jj maybank x female!reader, pogue friendship

warnings n stuff: angst angst angst all around (with a happy ending tho!!), the reader being a v. sad girl, mentions of anxiety/depression, failed long distance relationship, drifting apart, self-inflicted loneliness/isolation, the classic trope of 'they broke up but they're still in love with each other' that gives me feels, swearing (it's not my writing unless someone says 'fuck' at least once), reconciliation/mended relationships, traditional cheesy rom-com rain scene 'cause i'm a Dramatic Hoe™

a/n: and here's the second and final part of this looooong two-shot! thank you all so much for reading and i hope you enjoy the finale even though i low key kind of hate it 🙃. fun fact: surfrider beach is a real place in malibu known for its great waves :) also i apologize for how long this took to post, i dropped my laptop and the screen broke so i had to wait for it to get fixed lmao. unbetaed as usual, any mistakes are my b.

~masterlist~

part two: like a ghost that no one knew

When you said goodbye to your friends three years ago, you should've known things would never be the same again. You were sixteen, still so young and naïve and full of an almost childlike hope that kept you from seeing the obvious: life wasn't fair. Sometimes, you could be holding all the right cards and still lose the game.

It should've been easy. You had a video chat schedule already figured out, promises of daily texts and Snapchats, a boyfriend willing -enthusiastically willing, in fact- to go long distance and make it work no matter what 'cause you both agreed that what you had was something worth fighting for. You and your friends had weathered many storms together, what was one more? It could've been easy but you underestimated just how cruel California would be.

You traded one coast for the other and watched the sun set over the Pacific alone when you would've given anything to watch it rise over the Atlantic with your friends. It hurt to surf solo but you did it anyway, even though it felt like a damn sucker punch each time you caught yourself scanning the sand for JJ and his proud smile when you successfully caught bigger and bigger waves at Surfrider Beach.

Long distance was hard. You had days where all you wanted to do was lay on your bed for hours, safely curled up in his arms as he ran his fingers through your hair but you had to settle for his voice over the phone and one of his shirts from your closet instead. You missed everything about him: his pretty eyes that looked like the clearest ocean, the cheeky grin he'd send your way after making a stupid joke that had you affectionately rolling your eyes in exasperation, that adorable flush that spread across his face without fail each and every time you said you loved him. You longed for his constant affection; the way he always wanted to keep you close somehow, his arm around your shoulders, hand in your back pocket, or fingers entwined with yours; how he could never go a day without kissing you. Being apart was nothing short of torture.

"I fucking miss you." He said late one night during a rare FaceTime session -his phone was a piece of shit so he had to 'borrow' John B's whenever he could- and you smiled despite the knife twisting itself deeper and deeper into your heart as you played with the fraying sleeve of his old sweatshirt you wore.

"I fucking miss you more, J." You whispered back, giggling quietly when he scrunched up his nose in playful skepticism.

"Yeah, I don't think so, babe. There's no way."

"Yes, way!"

Although it hurt like hell, you imagined being tangled up with him in the hammock hanging in the Chateau's yard under the North Carolina sky -the light from the moon would turn his blond hair a pale silver as he grinned down at you and cupped your cheek in his hand, closing that final distance between you for a kiss that'd fuel the fire racing through your veins- and you let that fleeting happiness carry you through the night, long after you said goodbye. You fell asleep with your phone in your hand, unaware that your mother had been listening from the other side of your closed door.

You'd been distant from her and your dad in the months since the move, obviously going out of your way to avoid them both by spending all your spare time surfing at the beach, coming home well past sunset and heading straight to your room without a word. They'd taught you forgiveness wasn't something to be given willingly -it had to be earned- and since neither of them had done anything worthy to deserve an absolution, you simply pretended they didn't exist and let yourself stew in your justified anger.

Until the morning after your video date with JJ, they'd wisely given you your space so you were pretty blind sighted to find them both waiting for you at the dining room table, one of your dad's famous cinnamon rolls on a plate set in front of your usual chair. You paused in the middle of tying one of your boyfriend's worn bandanas in your hair before abruptly continuing toward the front door, acting like you didn't see the hopeful looks on their faces that made guilt slowly start to burrow its way into your chest.

"Y/N, wait," Your dad sprung from his seat and reached his hand out toward your elbow, his face falling when you instantly pulled back and crossed your arms. "Please, let's just talk for a second."

"I'm gonna be late for the bus," You lied and tried for the door again, sighing in frustration when he blocked your path and ushered you toward the table where your mom was sitting, biting her thumbnail. The guilt burrowed deeper: you thought she kicked that habit years ago but there she was, chewing her nail to shreds and it was all because of you (the empty satisfaction you felt knowing you were the cause of her stress made you hate yourself just a little more.).

"Jellybean, don't worry about that. I'll drive you."

You bristled at the old nickname but sat in the chair your dad pulled out for you anyway. The smell of the cinnamon roll he pushed your way made your mouth water but you refused to eat and kept your eyes down as you played with the stack of bracelets adorning your wrist. "You wanted to talk?" You asked, deciding to just rip the band-aid off all at once 'cause knowing your mom when she was anxious and your dad being allergic to any type of confrontation, you'd have sat there all day until one of them worked up the courage to speak.

"Talk, right." Bill said with a nervous chuckle, shaking his head as he took a seat and swiped his own cinnamon roll from the pan in the middle of the table. "Uh, how are you?"

"Are you serious right now?" You asked incredulously, looking up from your lap with a raised eyebrow. "All this for 'how are you?'"

"How would we know?" Your mom finally spoke up as she pulled her ruined nail from her mouth, only to start instantly drumming her fingers on the table. "You're always holed up in your room or at the beach, Y/N. You never talk to us anymore."

You rolled your eyes before fixing her with a deadpan stare. "Hmm, I wonder why."

"Honey, you know I'm sorry-"

"Don't, okay? Just don't." You swallowed thickly and dumped the cinnamon roll back into the pan, blinking away the awful burning pressure building behind your eyes. "I can't listen to some half-assed apology that you don't mean!"

"Y/N, we are sorry. Everything's gonna get better, just give it time." Your dad's reply was muffled by a mouthful of pastry and any other time, you'd usually be laughing at his chipmunk cheeks but instead you just stared back down at your hands again, lip quivering as you tried and failed to hold yourself together. You would not cry. You would not cry. You would not-

"Please, honey." Your mom tentatively reached out one hand like she was approaching a wounded animal, her voice so soft you could barely hear it above the rush of blood in your ears. "It hurts us to see you like this-"

Oh, fuck this shit.

"You're hurt?! Are you kidding me?" Your chair scraped along the tile as you rocketed to your feet, vision blurring when the dam finally broke. "You promised we wouldn't move again until after I graduated and you broke that promise. I let myself make friends for once in my goddamn life -I fucking fell in love, Mom! I fell in love with the most amazing boy who, by some miracle loves me, too despite me being a...a complete loser!" You were rambling now but you couldn't find it in yourself to care about or stop the words flying from your mouth.

"God, I was happy -so, so disgustingly happy it kind of scared me, okay?" You laughed bitterly and roughly wiped the tears from your cheeks, only to have more immediately take their place. "And you didn't even stop to think before you took it all away from me! So don't even talk to me about being hurt 'cause you have no fucking idea!"

Your dad was frozen, eyes the same color as your own blown impossibly wide in the middle of another bite of cinnamon roll while your mom, two tears streaking perfect twin tracks down her cheeks, looked at you like you'd just told her the world was ending -to her, it just might've been but to you, it already had. Neither of them said another word as you snatched your backpack off the couch and stormed from the house, slamming the door behind you.

Halfway to the bus stop, you decided school just wasn't in the cards that day and doubled back, hiding behind the shed in your backyard until your tears had run dry and both of your parents left -Rebekah to the hospital, Bill to wherever he went while you were in class- before heading inside to change into your rash vest and grab your board. Despite it being early Friday morning, Surfrider Beach was full of life and you welcomed the hustle and bustle as you turned off your phone and buried it at the bottom of your bag, leaving your problems behind on the sand.

You spent the whole day at the beach, blissfully alone and free to do what you wanted, until the sun dipped low in the sky and you were too exhausted to even think about anything but dragging yourself home so you could pass the fuck out. You caught one final wave before heading back to shore, waving goodbye to the group of other kids you'd surfed with all day (the one thing you loved about California: everyone was so chill) and trudged through the sand toward your things where, just as you expected, your sister sat on your towel, clad in a baggy UCLA long-sleeve with her phone in hand.

"Bitch, you killed it out there!" She looked up as you dropped your board to the ground and sat down heavily beside her, slipping an old Kildare County High School sweatshirt -the first one you ever 'borrowed' from your boyfriend, much to his delight- over your head. "I mean, look at you go!"

You leaned closer to watch the video she took, the barest hint of a smile on your face when you watched yourself perform a near perfect cutback on the screen. "That's 'cause I had the best teacher."

Daisy tagged you and posted it to Instagram before you could protest, then tossed the phone back into her bag and turned to you with a forced cheerfulness that kind of made you want to smack her. "So..."

"Mom and Dad sent you to clean up their mess." You finished quietly, tucking your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around them as your sister sighed dramatically and offered a sympathetic wince.

"As always." She copied your position and you both stared out at the sun sinking over the water, its fading rays turning the sky brilliant shades of orange and pink. It was typical of your parents to send Daisy after you when you were upset -after all, you'd both been each other's only friend for over half your lives- and normally, you'd be glad to see your sister's friendly face instead of your mom's or dad's. That evening, though? All you felt was...disappointment.

"Guess they really don't give a shit about me." You mumbled under your breath, half-hoping Daisy didn't hear you but from the way she snapped her head in your direction, you didn't get your wish.

"Y/N, that's not it. They're just..."

"Just what? Pretending that they didn't stab me in the back? Acting like everything's all hunky-dory and they actually cared about my feelings?"

You hastily wiped at your face when your sister silently looped an arm around your shoulders and tucked you against her side, her fingers running soothingly through the ends of your damp hair as you vented all of your frustrations -everything you'd kept locked deep inside your heart- until your voice was hoarse and the sun had long disappeared from the horizon and you had no tears left to cry.

"You have no idea what it's like, being so lonely it hurts to breathe. It hurts knowing Mom and Dad have each other and you have Daniel and I'm alone all the time." You lifted your head from her shoulder and rubbed your red eyes with your sleeve. "Worst part is, they just keep acting like I'll wake up one day and magically be okay and everything'll be all sunshine and rainbows again."

"First off, I wanna say that I'm sorry for not making more time for you. I knew you were struggling and I'm a terrible big sister for not being here for you like I should have," You squeezed Daisy's other hand in thanks as she tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, her voice soft and steady like the waves crashing against the shore. "Second, I definitely don't think Mom and Dad are handling this the way they should, but I think they're trying in the only way they know how. That should count for something, right?"

You sighed and tugged the sleeves of your sweatshirt over your hands. "I guess, but they haven't even tried to see where I'm coming from and they don't get that I'm not the only one they hurt. If I have to hear one more half-assed apology, I'm gonna lose my shit. Again."

"I'm not saying you have to forgive them right away 'cause I sure as hell wouldn't until they say they're sorry and mean it. But..." She said, pulling you to your feet and shaking the sand from the towel you were sitting on, "you shouldn't keep shutting them out, okay? It's not healthy."

You tucked your board under your arm as Daisy grabbed your bag and swung it onto her shoulder before you both started walking toward the parking lot. "What if I'm never ready to forgive them?"

"That's a question I don't have the answer to." She said with a shrug. "You've gotta figure that one out for yourself."

So you followed your sister's advice. You were civil and gradually, your relationship with your parents improved until you could stand to be in the same room as them and even carry on a short conversation, even though you knew you'd probably never be able to fully trust them again. You caught them exchanging glances you could only describe as wounded when you often turned down their invitations to go to the movies or get ice cream or other things you used to love doing when you were younger but for the most part, they took it in stride and you were grateful for their little efforts. Forgiveness wasn't in the cards quite yet but with each passing day, you felt the icy wall around your heart slowly start to melt away.

But every time you thought you were taking one step forward, life pushed you two steps back. Just when you were getting things back on track with your family, the train went flying off the rails when it came to your friends and it was all your fault.

It wasn't like you didn't try -God, did you try- to keep yourself from falling back into old habits but Malibu just had a way of bringing out the absolute worst in you. Your old self, the girl who kept to herself and pushed everyone away, someone you thought you buried in the deepest grave, slowly came back from the dead with a vengeance little by little, so subtly you didn't realize what was happening until it was too late.

One missed phone call turned into two, texts went unanswered for days or not at all, FaceTime sessions happened less and less. The last video chat had been with Kiara and it ended terribly, after you blew up at her for mending her friendship with Sarah Cameron in the near two years since you'd been gone, spitting words you couldn't quite remember -something along the lines of 'didn't take you too long to replace me, huh' and calling the blonde girl a 'heinous bitch'- but knew you regretted with everything you had and hanging up before she had a chance to explain. You couldn't even recall the last time you talked to Pope or John B aside from the occasional Snapchat and your daily calls with JJ had turned to once a week, if you were lucky.

He was trying, you could tell, and so were you but the deck was stacked against you and you were never very good at cards, anyway. It hurt to try, it hurt not to try, everything just hurt. Nearly two years apart had done their damage and coupled with your debilitating fear of being forgotten that clawed at your chest like a rabid dog, your relationship was on unstable ground and for the first time in almost four years, you were thinking about the end. It wasn't like you didn't love him anymore (holy shit, were you still completely head over heels in love). In fact, you loved him so much you realized that he could do so, so much better than you and the thought rested heavy and bittersweet on your mind, lurking in the shadows until you were ready to bring it to light.

It happened on New Year's Eve. Alone in your room, your hands shook as you answered JJ's call at midnight, his voice tired and a little hoarse from celebrating the new year three hours earlier on the opposite coast and you nearly started crying right then and there when you replied with a shaky "I think we need to talk."

"Babe, what's wrong?"

You took a deep breath and said quietly, "Everything."

"Talk to me." The pure concern in those three words nearly convinced you to call it off, to tell him to forget you said anything and that you were fine, everything was just fine but deep down, you knew you couldn't.

"I've been thinking about us and I...I just think that you deserve better than me. Someone who can actually be there for you when you need her and hold you when your dad's an asshole and see you every day. Someone who can laugh at your silly jokes and share a joint with you and clean you up when you get into fights defending your friends-"

"Babe, what are you talking about? That girl is you."

"Maybe I was but I'm not anymore and I don't think I have been since I left. I just can't be the girl you want, I can't be the girl you deserve, J -I'm a total fucking mess and you can do so, so much better than me."

"Y/N."

You didn't know you were crying until you heard the broken way he breathed your name and salt water dripped from your chin onto the bracelet around your wrist.

"...are you breaking up with me?" His voice was impossibly small, the quietest you'd ever heard it and the exact moment your battered heart shattered into pieces was when you realized he didn't even put up a fight.

"I think so." The words tore through you like a gunshot as you cried, curling into yourself on the bed in an effort to ward off the worst pain you'd ever felt in your life and you wondered if it was possible to die from a wound that wasn't even physical.

He was quiet for a long time, so long you thought he hung up without you noticing through your tears, until he sniffed on the other end of the line.

"Guess we had a pretty good run, huh?" He asked with a watery chuckle and you found yourself giving a tiny, shuddering giggle in response -God, even when you were breaking his heart he still managed to make you laugh.

"The best, baby." The pet name slipped out like second nature and you winced, hastily trying to cover your mistake with an awkward cough but from the sharp breath you heard him take, he'd heard it anyway.

("I'm sorry," you said, and it stood as an apology for more than just your slip-up.)

"I love you, Y/N. Probably always will."

"I'll never stop loving you, JJ. That's a promise."

You let yourself believe him as you laid there bleeding from a gash you couldn't see, a wound you knew would never heal, and you hoped he let himself believe you, too, even when you ended the call without another word and threw your phone away from you, not bothering to see where it landed. The sound of your heavy, broken sobs filled the room and you didn't even mind when your mom, who you knew had been listening from the other side of your closed door like always, barged in and took you into her arms, stroking your hair as you cried into her lap.

If you were supposed to avoid getting hurt by leaving first, why did it feel like everything in you was broken? If you were making the right choice, why did it feel so wrong? You didn't have the answers and no matter how hard you searched, you knew you'd ever find them.

So you tried to stay busy. You joined the surf club at school, got a part-time job at the local aquarium, did anything you could to distract yourself from the hurt and the guilt and the way getting out of bed every morning was the hardest thing to do. Surf club introduced you to Mackenzie, the one girl who was more ostracized at school -an even richer version of the kook academy you hated -than you, her for being freakishly tall and you for your East Coast attitude, and the two of you became fast, if reluctant friends. Mack didn't try to stitch the gaping hole in your heart caused by your absent friends but she numbed the pain just enough to make it bearable and you were grateful for her calm, steady presence at your side, even as you both tried to keep each other at arm's length.

Later, you found out she was just like you, friendless and awkward with no self-esteem and a tendency to push people away, and that just cemented your friendship through the summer and your final year of high school.

Mack told you all about her life, growing up with no siblings, having height that she never learned to deal with, and a debilitating social anxiety that made making friends near impossible, and in turn you told her about how you hopped from town to town on your mother's whims, the wonderful friends you let slip away, and the beautiful boyfriend you loved enough to let go, and you both cried together for the lives you could've led.

"You two looked so happy," She said during the first sleepover you hosted as she held one of the many picture frames littering your dresser, her lips turned upwards in a small smile.

You gently took the frame from her hands and ran your fingers over the grinning face of your ex-boyfriend, his arms wrapped around your shoulders as your painted lips planted a deep red kiss on his cheek, and the wave of longing washing over you was almost strong enough to bring you to your knees. "It was the happiest I've ever been."

"Do you miss him?"

"So much it hurts."

i miss you.

i'm so sorry.

i still love you.

You'd typed and erased those texts every day but never mustered the courage to hit send and you couldn't decide if that was a blessing in disguise or the worst possible curse. Of course you still loved JJ: you promised you would and even if you didn't, you couldn't stop if you tried. He was your first love, the boy you so willingly gave your whole heart and then some; you still kept his ring on your thumb -the one he gave you at the airport the day you left- and his bracelet around your wrist, his bandanas in your hair and his face in your dreams and you knew you always would.

Before you could blink, your eighteenth birthday flew by and graduation was upon you.

You thought the second you were done with high school you'd be gone, heading straight back to the Outer Banks and the life you left behind but you found yourself stalling on sending in an application to UNC -Chapel Hill until you missed the deadline for the fall semester. On the outside, you made up a semi-legit excuse about getting your basic courses done at a community college to save money but deep down you really knew why you procrastinated: you were terrified to go back. Ever since your break up with JJ, you hadn't spoken to him or any of your old friends other than the obligatory birthday wishes on Facebook and you wondered if the damage you'd done over the years was too much to come back from, even as you tried to work up the courage to find out for sure.

Another year passed: in between earning college credits, you and Daisy took a sister's trip to Disneyland, Mack asked you to tag along on a jaunt up the coast to San Francisco to see Alcatraz, your parents celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary (your gift was long-overdue forgiveness and they said it was the greatest thing you possibly could've given them). When the time came, you and Mack both sent out your applications to UNC -you for biology, her for chemistry- and the myriad of emotions you felt when you got in was nothing short of dizzying. The old you was terrified, screaming at you to rip up the letter and join your sister at UCLA instead of opening old wounds but the hopeful you, the girl who lived without fear, the girl who fell in love and let herself be loved, screamed louder.

And so you killed the old you once again, burying her even deeper than the last time in a locked chest and throwing the key as far as you could out into the Pacific where you knew you'd never find it. You clutched your acceptance letter close to your chest and took a step east, away from California and toward the place where your broken heart still rested, scattered in pieces across the sand.

Settling in at UNC was surprisingly easy. You and Mack already clicked pretty well as friends so making the transition to roommates was natural and, dare you say it, even a little fun and the two of you quickly fell into a comfortable routine in your tiny apartment off campus in Chapel Hill. Comfortable and yet...that happiness you once felt all those years ago was missing from your life and you found yourself just as restless as you were in Malibu. While you knew exactly what you needed to do, that fear kept rearing its ugly head in the back of your mind, poisoning your thoughts: what if they wouldn't be happy to see you, what if they forgot about you, what if they hated you? What if he hated you?

It was terrifying, picturing yourself turning up at the Chateau with a hopeful smile only to have the door slammed right in your face. Deep down, you knew they'd never do that to you no matter how badly you'd hurt them but when you'd spent your whole life expecting the worst, taking a leap of faith wasn't an easy feat -something Mack just couldn't wrap her head around.

"I don't get it."

You glanced up from where you were lounging on your bed, flipping through your biology notes in preparation for your lab exam the next morning and shot your roommate a confused look. "Get what?”

Mack sat at your desk, her own notebooks lying ignored as she spun the chair around to face you, arms crossed. "Why you haven't hopped on that ferry to go get your man yet!"

You froze for a moment too long before offering a half-hearted shrug as you fiddled with the beads at the end of your bracelet. "It's not that easy. He probably wants nothing to do with me and I don't blame him."

"How do you know? You haven't talked to JJ in over a year, right?" At your tight nod, she continued, "What if he's just like you-"

"Depressed?"

Mack fixed you with a flat, unamused look. "Still in love, dumbass."

You scoffed and propped your chin in your hand as you glanced back down at your study guide, trying not to latch onto that little thought -hope and pain all rolled into one- that sparked to life at her words. He'd said he would probably always love you that New Year's Eve and back then you'd let yourself believe him but now, you weren't so sure. "Yeah, right. No way he's still...still in love with me after I broke his heart."

"Maybe he is, maybe he isn't," Your roommate said with a shrug, spinning around on the chair to grab her things. "You'll never know if you don't get over there, track his fine ass down, and talk to him."

You stared down at your notes without actually seeing anything, the slanted letters of your handwriting blurring before your eyes as the other girl flipped her chemistry book closed and stood, shooting you an warm smile that you didn't see.

"Listen, Y/N, you're my best friend and I want to see you happy more than anything but I can't take that jump for you. Yeah, it's scary and nerve wracking and you might end up hurt worse than before, so what? That's just...life."

Mack left after that, crossing the apartment to her room so she could get ready for a date with a girl from her psych class, leaving you alone with tears on your face and a million thoughts in your head, all of them terrifying and exciting and oh so loud.

She was right, of course -Mack always knew the right thing to say- and as you stared down at the bracelets on your wrists and the ring on your thumb, the pictures on your phone and the too-big shirt hanging off one shoulder, you realized sitting around moping wasn't gonna solve anything; if you wanted your happiness, your friends, the love of your life back, you needed to step up and fight for them with everything you had. And so you wiped the tears from your cheeks and walked to the cliff's edge with your head held high, ready for the fall and whatever came with it. You were ready to fix your mistakes, no matter how badly it might hurt.

Still, you couldn't do it all on your own. You needed some help to make things right again and while you knew just who to ask, you weren't quite sure if they'd be willing to lend a hand. Desperate times called for desperate measures though and you penned a good old-fashioned letter, feeling like a heroine in a Jane Austen novel as you poured all your thoughts -your dreams, wishes, hopes- onto a piece of paper in bold blue ink and sent it off to its destination on Figure 8, your Hail Mary for a happy ending sealed up neatly in a single envelope.

Mack, bless her heart, did her best to keep your spirits up as you waited on a response but even her ever reassuring presence couldn't keep you from worrying as one week passed by, then two. Halfway through the third you'd almost given up, already wracking your brain for another way to make your plan work when your phone chimed with a text from an unknown number.

i'll help you

And just like that, the moment you'd been waiting for was finally within your reach; you told your parents not to expect you for Thanksgiving break, called your sister for a much needed pep talk, and started counting down the days until you'd see your friends again, for better or worse.

When you left the Outer Banks three years ago, it was sunny. You were sixteen, young and in love and scared about the future.

When you returned, it was in the middle of a storm. You were nineteen, a little bit older but no less in love and definitely still scared about what was waiting for you at the end of the road.

Rain pounded against the roof of Sarah Cameron's SUV as she drove away from the docks and toward the Chateau, her fingers tapping along to the music playing quietly through the radio. You sat in the passenger seat, soaked to the bone from your ferry ride from the mainland and shaking like a leaf despite the towel wrapped around your shoulders and the warm air flowing from the car's vents.

"Thanks for coming to get me," You said, wincing at the awkward lilt of your voice echoing in the small space as you spun JJ's ring around your thumb and stared out the windshield at the familiar sights streaking by in blurred shades of green and brown. Being back opened a Pandora's box of emotions in your head, both good and bad, and instead of trying to sort them out, you let them bounce around in your brain like a pinball machine and concentrated on methodically twirling the warm metal ring in circles on your finger.

Sarah briefly glanced away from the road to shoot you a small smile, her kind eyes softening at your visible nervousness. "Not gonna lie, I was pretty sure you hated me so when I got your letter it kinda...threw me for a loop. Sorry it took me so long to reply."

You wished the heated leather seat would swallow you whole as you winced again and wrapped the towel tighter around your shoulders. "For the longest time, I thought I did hate you but I realized I was just...scared of losing my friends and I took it out on you. You didn't deserve to be labeled the villain in my story when I was the one, um, sabotaging myself, I guess." You took a deep breath and picked at a loose thread tickling your arm. "And I'm really, really grateful for your help."

It was more than you wanted to admit out loud -nearly the same words were written in the letter peeking out from the center console of the car- but at the same time, you knew it was what needed to be said and from the way the blonde girl's fingers stopped tapping against the steering wheel, she knew she needed to hear it. At a red light, she quickly tapped out a text on her phone before tossing in back into her bag with another tiny grin in your direction.

"Happy to help. For what it's worth, I'm so sorry if I made you feel like you were being replaced, I never intended to hurt you or steal your friends or...or, I don't know, usurp-"

"Sarah, stop. Please," You held up a hand to cut off her apology and offered her a self-deprecating smile. "I'm the one who's sorry. I let my...jealousy get the best of me and I feel so bad about all the shit I said 'cause that wasn't fair to you at all and I hope you can forgive me-"

"Y/N, there's nothing to forgive! We all say stupid shit when we're mad -trust me, I know." She interrupted with a bubbly, contagious giggle that seemed to scare away the gloomy storm clouds gathered over your head for a moment in time. "But I was never pissed at you, ever. I just want you to know that."

Stunned, you settled deeper into the seat and started playing with your ring again as she kept driving on, unbothered by your lack of response. You felt like you were thirteen again, back when Sarah and Kiara were your only friends, before the birthday disaster and the whole pogue versus kook feud that got completely out of hand; it felt...nice and you found yourself hoping that the blonde girl would still want to be your friend again, no matter what the others thought about your sudden return.

"Thank you."

Sarah gave no indication she heard your quiet confession of gratitude but from the way you watched her smile grow out of the corner of your eye, you knew she did. The rest of the drive passed in companionable silence as you retreated into your own thoughts, your nerves getting worse and worse the closer you got to your destination.

You took a deep breath and let it out slowly through your nose, feeling like your heart was trying to beat its way through your rib cage. You hadn't been this anxious in a long, long time, so long you almost forgot how much you hated the tightness in your chest, how your palms would start to sweat, the way you'd chew the inside of your cheek until you tasted blood on your tongue. By the time Sarah pulled into an open spot beside the achingly familiar Volkswagen parked in front of the Chateau, you were surprised you were still able to breathe.

The sight of the tiny house, one you spent so many carefree days and beautiful nights in alongside your friends, standing virtually unchanged in front of you was like a shot to the heart and your hands, curled into fists on your lap, began to shake without warning. Shit, you were a godforsaken mess; how the hell were you supposed to do this without having a mental breakdown?

"I'm so scared."

The whispered words, barely audible over the torrential rain against the roof, slipped from your mouth before you could stop them and Sarah slowly reached one hand over to give your trembling wrist a reassuring squeeze, the corners of her mouth curled upward in a slight smile.

"Don't be. They're gonna be so happy to see you!"

You turned to look at her, eyebrows knit together in disbelief. "How are you so sure they still care about me?"

"I'm sure 'cause I've seen it. My God, if only you could've heard all the times they talked about you -'I wish Y/N was here,' 'remember that time with Y/N,' hell, just straight 'I miss Y/N so fucking much,'" She said bluntly and shifted in the driver's seat to face you head on, smiling wider at the thunderstruck look on your face. "Pretty sure I haven't gone a week without JJ saying that last one at least once."

"I thought..." You paused, tongue darting out to run over your dry lips as you tried to put your jumbled feelings into words, "I thought he'd hate me -I mean, after all I've done, you think he still..."

"Loves you? Are you kidding?" Her reply was so enthusiastic it was hard not to believe her as she went on, her words like sunshine brightening the darkest corners of your mind. "He's still head over heels, I've never seen him even look at another girl in three damn years. You know he still wears your necklace, the one with the silver star? Kie told me all about it."

"I-I didn't." You remembered giving it to him the day you left, managing a shaky smile through your tears as you carefully clasped it around his neck, your fingers running over his skin as you settled the charm perfectly alongside that little shark tooth you'd grown to love.

('Be careful with this, baby. It's my favorite.' You had said, crying harder when he'd taken off one of his rings and slipped it onto your thumb.

'Well, this one's my favorite so take good care of it, okay?' His voice had been light but his eyes were heavy with unspoken words that you'd heard loud and clear because you knew your gaze said the exact same things.

don't let me go

don't break my heart

don't stop loving me)

You coughed to disguise the fat tears that started rolling down your face, quickly wiping them away with your sleeve but the blonde girl wasn't fooled as she gave your hand another friendly squeeze.

"Come on, they're probably wondering what's taking me so long," She sent a conspiratorial wink your way and grabbed her bag from the center console. "I told them I was picking up some pizzas but I have a funny feeling they won't be too pissed that I lied."

With a desperate grip on the strap of your backpack and your heart racing, you trailed behind Sarah through the rain to the front porch.

"Ready?" She glanced back where you lingered at the top of the stairs, anxiously shuffling from foot to foot, and shot you a smile that did little to calm your nerves. "Just wait here!"

She knocked on the door before you could reply and yelled loud enough to be heard over the pouring rain, "Hey, it's me! Can somebody get the door? My hands are kinda full."

"Got it!"

Your bag slipped from your fingers and fell onto the porch with a loud thump at the sound of the voice floating through the open windows, a voice you heard nearly every night as you slept, in your dreams of a future you wanted with everything you had. You knew it better than your knew your own, knew every pitch and tone and lilt; quiet and raspy in the mornings when you woke up in each other's arms, loud and carefree during long days spent under the golden sun with the rest of your friends, soft and warm and laid bare at night when he showed how much he loved you with more than just words.

Sarah gave you an enthusiastic thumbs up before stepping to the side just as the door opened and you suddenly found yourself struggling to breathe as you stared into the wide blue eyes of your ex-boyfriend. JJ stared right back, one of the hands you used to hold clenched so tight around the doorknob his knuckles were white, the lips you used to kiss parted in surprise, the blond hair you used to run your fingers through falling onto his forehead like always and the familiar, beautiful sight of him standing close enough to touch made your knees weak.

"You're not pizza."

It was such a JJ thing to say and you didn't know whether to laugh or cry as you swallowed thickly and shook your head. "Sorry to disappoint you."

"I'm not."

"Oh."

Hope flared white hot in your chest at his words but it quickly started to fade, replaced by fear when he made no move toward you, his fingers still gripping tight to the door, and you felt your face start to heat in embarrassment as Sarah looked back and forth between the two of you like she was watching a tennis match.

God, you were so stupid. What did you expect would happen, showing up out of the blue after over a year of no contact? Everything would fall into place again with just one long, heavy look? Believing it could be that easy turned you into a complete and total fool, tongue-tied and insecure and weak.

"Yo, what's the hold up?" John B's voice asked from inside the house and Sarah leaned down to call through the open window, "Come out here and find out!"

A wave of dizziness hit you like a truck and you took a sudden step back toward the stairs, arms wrapping around your stomach as it twisted itself into knots. "I'm sorry, I-I shouldn't have come. This was a mistake." You didn't notice the stricken look that crossed JJ's face or the three familiar, stunned expressions that appeared behind him in the darkened doorway before turning away and stumbling off the porch toward the road, leaving your bag behind and you definitely didn't notice how you barely made it off the bottom stair before a set of footsteps hastily gave chase.

"It wasn't a mistake, Y/N!" JJ's desperate voice stopped you in your tracks, halfway across the yard with more than just rain running down your face. "Not to me, never to me."

His soft touch on your wrist sent shockwaves through your body and you instantly became putty in his hands, letting him turn you around without a fight to face him, watching in fascination as the downpour started to darken his gray shirt and flatten his hair against his forehead. Three years hadn't changed much about him -he was a little taller, hair a little longer, the muscles in his arms a little more defined- and when you met his wide-eyed gaze, beads of rain dripping from his long eyelashes like diamonds, you wondered if he was thinking about the differences time created between the younger you of the past and the you of the right now, too.

"Oh." You repeated dumbly, struggling for something, anything to say that didn't make you sound like an illiterate fool. Even at nineteen, words still weren't your strong suit so you let your actions speak for you as your hand reached out on its own accord to caress the silver star still clasped around his neck, the thumb still wearing his ring brushing slowly against the dip between his collarbones; he shivered, and you weren't really sure if it was from your touch or the cold.

"Y/N." JJ said your name like a prayer, like he couldn't believe you were there in front of him, and you inhaled sharply when both of his hands slowly, carefully moved to cup your face, his calloused thumbs habitually wiping the tears from your cheeks over and over, even as more instantly replaced the ones he swept away. "I fucking missed you."

You stood there, looking like a damned drowned rat with your hair dripping into your eyes, shivering in your soaked jeans and Kildare County High School sweatshirt, the love of your life cradling your face so gently in his hands, and so many things you wanted to say flooding your brain but only the one that mattered the most managed to get by your trembling lips.

"I'm still in love with you."

You noticed a lot when you put your heart on the line: the steady, soothing sound of water falling through the trees, the bright, clean taste of rain on your tongue, how the sun was just barely starting to peek out from behind the stormy clouds, but they all paled in comparison to the little things you noticed about the boy in front of you; blue irises made even brighter by the red rimming his eyes, how he stepped closer on the wet grass until the tips of his scuffed boots touched your worn gray high tops, the way his hands trembled ever so slightly against your flushed face.

"Well, it's your lucky day 'cause I'm still in love with you, too."

All of the breath left your lungs in one big rush when JJ smiled hopefully -oh, how you loved everything about that smile: his slightly crooked teeth, that dimple in his cheek, the endearing pink blush swept across his nose- and you felt yourself return it without a second thought, your own hope once again burning bright in your chest.

"Even after...everything?" Your voice shook like the fingers you slid into the hair at his nape and he leaned down to rest his forehead against yours, close enough you could feel his breath on your lips when he spoke.

"I told you I'd always love you, didn't I?"

You nodded, a delicious shiver running down your spine when he tilted his head just so and gently bumped your nose with his. You remembered all the times he did that through the years, a dizzying slideshow of memories that flashed through your mind like lightning, and your fingers wove themselves deeper in his hair.

"I have so many things to apologize for," You said with a tiny, quiet shake of your head, tearing your eyes away from his in shame and staring over his shoulder toward where the rest of your friends watched from the porch, all crowded together at the top of the stairs with identical enthralled expressions on their faces. "There are so many mistakes I've made and people I've hurt and I have no idea how to even start saying sorry for it all."

"Babe."

The sound of your old pet name caused your gaze to snap right back to his and your heart felt like it was about to beat right out of your chest when one of his hands trailed down the sensitive skin of your neck and then lower until it traced along the curve of your hip and left a line of fire in its wake.

"We'll figure that out later, okay?" JJ said as his fingers tucked a loose strand of wet hair behind your ear, a coy, ardent grin on his face. "'Cause I've been waiting three years to kiss you again and if I don't get to do it soon, I'm gonna lose my fucking mind."

You smiled -a wide, joyful, elated smile- and rose up on your tiptoes in anticipation. "Then kiss me."

You didn't have to tell him twice. His lips pressed against yours desperately, like he needed you to breathe, like you were the very air in his lungs, religiously, like your mouth was the altar and he was there to worship as he pulled you close, the fingers of one hand tangling in your hair while the others dug into your hip. You kissed him back just as hard and the familiar taste of him on your tongue -mint, smoke, salt- sent that dearly missed spark racing through your veins like wildfire.

It was a little cliché, having your long-awaited reunion kiss in the rain but it was honest and candid and real and so much better than anything you could've dreamed. You lost yourself in his touch like you used to, clinging to him like a lifeline and pouring your whole heart into every fierce brush of your lips against his, both of you pulling away for a moment only to dive right back in each time. It was addictive, intoxicating, and you could've spent the rest of your life standing there in the middle of the yard and kissing like there was no tomorrow if a loud, ear-piercing wolf whistle hadn't come from the direction of the porch.

The two of you broke apart just barely, with foreheads still pressed together and swollen lips, and you couldn't stop yourself from giggling when JJ blindly flipped the bird over his shoulder before pulling you back in for another eager kiss that filled your whole body with an exhilarating, heavenly heat that never faded, even after four enthusiastic voices suddenly surrounded you like an excited swarm of nosy, buzzing bees.

"You aren't the only one who missed her, J." Kiara said, smiling widely as you reached out to grab her hand and pull her into a powerful one-armed hug, her chin resting on your shoulder.

"Yeah, stop hogging all the love!" John B added, throwing himself into the pile along with Pope, who slung an arm around your shoulders as he said, "Great to have you back, Y/N."

Sarah was the last to join and she quietly tucked herself under John B's arm with a pleased grin on her face, nodding when you mouthed 'thank you' in her direction. The six of you stood there in the rain, smiling like fools, and as the sun started to scare away the dark clouds overhead and in your heart, a weight you didn't even realize had been crushing your chest slowly began to lift away with each freeing breath.

You still had a lot of work to do: wrongs to be righted, apologies to be made, explanations -not excuses- to be given for every shitty thing you did in your past. But as happy tears started streaming down your face once again and you felt the arms of the friends you’d thought were lost to you forever tighten around you at the sight, you knew in your bones all would be forgiven. You knew that after three long years, you'd finally come home.

let me know what you think! i read each and every one of your comments and cry because they mean so much to me! ❤

taglist ❤: @sinkbeneathwaves @cordeliascrown @maysbanks @jjpogueprincess @bibliophilewednesday @k-n-e @jiaraendgame @alexa-playafricabytoto @heypearce @sexualparkour (send me an ask if you’d like to be added or removed!)

#outer banks #obx fic #jj maybank #jj maybank fic #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank x y/n #obx imagine #obx netflix #outer banks imagine #jj maybank x you #kiara carrera #john b #john b routledge #pope heyward #sarah cameron

174 notes · View notes

soukokuwu · 4 years

Text

➤ genre: angst

➤ pairing: dazai x bestfriend!reader

➤ synopsis: dazai wishes he could meet you all over again.

➤ warnings: implied death, suicide

➤ word count: 1.7k

➤ a/n: this is just me indulging myself because of recent events. completely unedited so if there’re any mistakes please forgive me. might edit this next time into a better piece, if i can bring myself to revisit.

Wandering

Insanity and death were the angels that surrounded Dazai Osamu’s cradle and followed him through life. Insanity was in each choice he made while death lived in everyone around him. But a most foreign concept to the man is hope. Yet it brimmed the brightest in you.

This burned a desire in him, but same as anything else, if there was a fire, there would always be the possibility of it burning to ashes. And this did. But he will never make the same mistake again. That much Dazai is sure of. Because it’s simple math.

The more you have, the more you have to lose.

It’s easy to forget what loss feels like when you have it all. He never forgot what he lost, how could he? He remembers Odasaku clear as day — but the feeling? It’s easy to bury it under the happiness one feels in the moment. But emotions can resurface easily, just like the aftershocks of an earthquake.

Friends have a special place in his heart. There’s not many people he would call a ‘friend’ at all in the first place. He doesn’t use the word lightly, doesn’t throw it around like most people do. No, if he ever called you a friend, he meant it.

And as he sat alone in your room, all he could think of was everything you couldn’t do anymore; everything that he couldn’t have.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He remembered when he first met you.

You weren’t particularly striking, you weren’t the prettiest girl in the room — or at least he thought so at the time. But you had the most infectious smile. Everytime you laughed it was like people wanted to know you, to get close to you. It was a certain quality you had that Dazai admired, because he fell for it too.

Dazai might not have felt so inclined to get to know you that day, but he sure was glad he did. Because you ended up meaning a lot more to him than he bargained for. It was the slow kind of progress, the subtlety of every small thing that he grew to like, the one where he didn’t even feel a thing, but yet it’s embedded in him anyway.

You were so easy to like, and it’s not because you’re a people-pleaser — you certainly weren’t. Until now, if you asked him why, he couldn’t put it to words. You just were.

It wasn’t love at first sight. Dazai doesn’t think that exists. But even if it did, he thinks whatever he saw in you that day was even greater. It wasn’t the shallow kind of love that he envisioned people attached to the idiom. It meant much more than that, a way deeper connection that he couldn’t explain.

Dazai Osamu doesn’t throw the word ‘friend’ out so casually.

But he called you a friend within days of meeting you. And he wished he could find the rationale behind it. Maybe then he could find another you.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He remembered never regretting it.

Whenever he did anything unreasonable, questionable, or even something outright wrong — you stood by him. What was it? What was the reason behind that unconditional support you gave him? He tried so hard to push you away, but you never failed him. You were always there, like a lifebuoy at sea, like the lighthouse guiding him to shore.

And he treasured you. So much. Which was why he never hid himself from you, always stripped away all his masks when he was alone with you. You were more than aware of his suicidal tendencies and his rather questionable coping methods. But you never had to say a thing. You were just there for him. And just like that, you made him want to live. Just a little. But that’s further than anyone else had made it.

Not only did he strip his masks. He had let you see him. Every single inch of him. The man beneath the bandages. Both the scars hidden under the wraps as well as the reasons why he was the way he was. The good and the bad. Dazai Osamu had let you in completely. You were such an unlikely happening, yet there you were.

He doesn’t throw the word ‘friend’ out so casually.

But it was at that moment that he ascertained — you were his best friend.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He remembered you happy.

Dazai wasn’t a terribly fun person to be around. He had his comedic moments, yes. But he didn’t have a lot of free time, or when he did he preferred to stay in. He didn’t spend much time with you outside of having the occasional dinner together. But god, he wished he had.

He just can’t help but remember the way your face would light up when he actually wanted to hang out some place other than either of your homes. Dazai knew you were a shut-in, so he didn’t bother asking if you went anywhere. He knew the answer already anyway.

You liked taking long walks in the park, just sitting and enjoying the wind, soaking in the scenery. Sometimes you got tired so easily you’d pester him to carry you. He didn’t give in, of course.

“Come on, Dazai, please?”

Dazai remembered every infliction in your tone. He remembered how sweet you sounded. He even remembered the way you pouted when he refused.

He wish he hadn’t.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He remembered the unexpectedness of it all.

Dazai thought it was something normal, nothing too worrisome. But it was black masquerading as a dark grey. The hope he carried was fleeting.

Your lids seemed heavier than usual, your movements just a tad slower than they should be. Dazai notices all of this, but what he’s wondering is do you? A string of aimless assurances escapes your lips when he voiced his concerns.

Then you started out just losing weight — he thought you were just feeling under the weather, nothing more nothing less. Your appetite got better, and so he felt relief. You even started gaining weight, you looked vibrant still, with enough energy to entertain Dazai and his antics again, enough to be able to chase after him when he splashed some water at you while you were walking by the fountain in the park.

Yeah, it‘s hard to envision, isn’t it? Dazai and those cute, warm moments, those small gestures. But that’s exactly what you were capable of bringing out of him. There existed in him a warmth he never knew there was. You not only made him realise that, but you managed to project it out of him.

Dazai didn’t completely hate it. The warmth he exuded made him feel like he was just a little bit more human than he thought. A little more vulnerable (that was the part he hated), but also... a little more like you.

And he remembered looking at you as you chased him — how could anything like you be remotely bad? In that moment, he felt like he had everything. A life, a job, a house and a home in you, his best friend. Dazai didn’t need lovers. Lovers came and went. None of them could capture his heart. Yet you did. And you did it without any of the romance, you did it purely because you were being unequivocally yourself.

Then in that moment he realised — you were beautiful. Just the slow kind, the kind that grew on you, the one you never expected coming. And when it hits you, it hits you like the waves hit the sand — it was here to stay, it would be weird without it.

But he also remembered you falling, and his heart along with you.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He remembered everything.

In the dining room where you’d eat takeout together and you’d pester Dazai for some of his food. The way you two squabbled about it, with Dazai refusing because “if you liked it you should’ve ordered it for yourself too.” But then you’d be able to snatch it from right under his nose anyway. He let you think it was your skill, but he purposely let you have it. He liked to see that happy little grin of yours when you thought you were so sly.

In the living room where you’d watch shows together when the two of you were bored enough. Sometimes you’d fall asleep on his shoulder and Dazai would be too scared to move; he didn’t want to wake you. You looked so peaceful too.

In the bathroom where Dazai would sloppily put together a bath for you when you were feeling sick. He didn’t know a thing about drawing a bath, but he tried, and you always stifled a laugh at how mediocre it was.

In the bedroom where he’d accompany you when you fell really ill. He’d wait and sit by your bedside every night, talking to you until you fell asleep. It didn’t take long though, because you were so exhausted from nothing at all that you could only stay awake for five minutes tops.

But now all he can think of is the fact that no one would be arguing with him to get a piece of his food, that there’s no one to provide his shoulder for, no one to try and draw baths for, and the missing sound of your breathing as you drifted off into sleep.

There was no one else to try for.

Dazai Osamu wishes he could say you were a mistake. But you aren’t. You were the best thing that ever happened to him, but you were also the most devastating loss dealt to him. You deserved better. Much better.

He doesn’t throw the word ‘friend’ out so casually.

But you still are his best friend, even in death — that you shall remain. And the thing about mistakes is that more often than not, there’s something to learn from it. You aren’t a mistake and never will be, but one decision is made here:

Dazai Osamu will never replace you, will never get close to anyone again.

He doesn’t think he’ll be able to take another loss. Besides, he can’t lose if there’s nothing left to be taken from him. All he hopes for is that wherever you are, you don’t feel lonely anymore and that some day, he will find your soul again.

You had helped him so much when you were alive. But as he looks at the blade in his hand, he wonders. If there was an afterlife, will you be disappointed if he does this? Rationality be damned as he points the tip of the blade to his wrist.

I want to be with you again.

tags: @yokelish @gogolparadise @fyowyn-writes

197 notes · View notes

jjungkookislife · 4 years

Text

The Key to My Drawer Ch. 6

pairing: taehyung x reader

genre: bf2l, angst, smut 18+

wc: 2..7k

warnings: cursing, unprotected sex, sex on the beach, hickeys, major miscommunication

date: June 30, 2020

Your alarm goes off early the next morning. Way too early for a Saturday morning, but you wanted to get an early start to your day so you could get back in bed and read more of Taehyung’s letters.

After getting up and ready for the day, you feed Tannie before you take him out on a morning walk. You text Taehyung to make sure he’s alright after last night. You know how rowdy Jimin and Jungkook can be when they get together with Namjoon, Jin, Hoseok and Yoongi. Though you’re not surprised that Hoseok is the first out of your friends to get married.

“Come on, Tannie. Time to go home,” you swear you see him pout before he follows you back to the apartment, immediately going to his water bowl before retreating to his bed to nap.

You make some coffee, it’ll hold you over until lunchtime. You’re not one to have breakfast so early in the morning, besides, you’re aching to get back to the letters.

I honestly don’t know how I snuck in my journal to write you this letter, but I can just barely see you sitting not too far from me. Well, I see the back of your head, you’re looking around trying to find me but you haven’t looked over here yet. I’m sure Jungkook will get your attention shortly, he’s just found one of my letters and won’t shut up about me confessing.

The fact that he hasn’t gone to tell you right now is a miracle, but he’s sitting on the edge of his seat wondering which of his professors would stop him from getting to you. I threatened to hit him but he’s a brick wall and it wouldn’t end well for me or my hand… so I won’t. For now.

You look as gorgeous as ever in your cap and gown, I can’t help but stare. I wonder if you can feel it… oh! You almost saw me; turn a little more my love. I’m right here. I know you’re nervous; I am too, but you’ll be fine. All we have to do is sit through the ceremony and go on stage to get our diplomas.

I can’t believe we made it… I had no doubts that you would but me? I slacked off more than I should have, but you kept me in line. My parents are grateful to you. They keep asking when I’ll tell you… I don’t know how they figured it out. We haven’t been home in a while but my mom smiled and said, “a mother knows.”

They’re up there in the stands, our moms’ sitting together and our dads’ handing them tissues as they plan our wedding. I wish I was kidding; I caught sight of our moms’ wedding planning book. It’s actually kind of cute…

A wedding… our wedding.

The thought should terrify me, right? We’re only twenty-two and a half but the thought isn't terrifying, not to me at least. I know there’s plenty you want to do before you settle down, and I hope I’m by your side when you do them.

We’re leaving for Europe next week and then after I’m moving into my new apartment and you into yours the week after. I’m not sure how we each scored places on the same block, but I’m not gonna knock it.

Your dazzling smile just caught me off guard when I looked up. You found me; I knew you would. You waved at me before forming the shape of a heart with your hands. I love you.

My heart is pounding so hard, and my hands have grown clammy. Is this what love feels like all the time? Exhilarating? I didn’t think love could make me feel like I’m buzzed and yet here we are.

Namjoon just asked me what I’m writing, I told him to mind his business but of course, he doesn’t listen. He knows now. He’s smiling like an idiot and singing “I knew it. I knew it.”

Unlike Jungkook, I know Namjoon can keep a secret, but I know it’s only a matter of time until they all find out. Jimin says I get heart-eyes when I look at you…

I thought Jimin was bluffing until he took Jungkook’s camera one day when we were together. He took a picture of me looking at you from afar. I think you and Yoongi were talking about what to make for lunch and I looked up to look for you. It’s not even a conscious decision to look for you, I just feel you’re missing from my side and my immediate reaction is to find you.

I’ll attach the picture to the back of this letter. I stared at it for so long, trying to prove Jimin wrong, but it’s there. I wonder if you’ve noticed?

Oh, it’s your turn to go up on stage. You look nervous, but you’re smiling. I can see your eyes searching for mine. I’m here, love.

You’ve found me, your sigh of relief is obvious as you keep looking back to make sure I’m watching.

I better set this down.

I’m so proud of you, Y/n! You did it! You looked so beautiful up on stage, even if you grimaced when our parents screamed your name at the top of their lungs. I hope you heard me and Jungkook too…

The ceremony was rather long. After watching you up there, I lost interest. Namjoon had to jostle me to get me to stand up because I couldn’t stop staring at you. He said, “come on, Loverboy. Your girl is waiting for you to cross that stage and graduate. Make her proud.”

My girl.

You as my girl… nothing sounds sweeter.

I want to make you proud, Yn. I want to be someone you’re proud to have in your life, whether as a friend or a partner; I want to be everything for you.

The moment we’re free to go after the ceremony, you come straight to me. You had Jungkook clear your path, pushing graduates out of your way. I swear that boy would be a fantastic linebacker.

“We did it, Tae!” you shouted as you threw yourself in my arms, I stumbled but I caught you, anyway. You grinned, kissing my cheek before I spun you around. You giggled, telling me to put you down before you kicked someone.

I set you down and you hugged me tightly before our parents came and joined us. We took several pictures together and with our parents before we headed out to dinner with them.

You held my hand under the table throughout dinner. I swear my heart would beat out of my chest from how hard it was beating. I tried to hide my blushing face, but nothing got past my mom. She gave me a look before dropping her napkin under the table, grinning from ear to ear when she caught sight of your hand in mine resting on my thigh.

I looked away, but she smiled and rejoined the conversation. I’m sure she told everyone when we left with Jungkook later that night.

We ended up back at the beach with all our friends, only this time, it wasn’t a loud house party. It was just the eight of us, just like it used to be back in high school on Saturday nights.

Everyone drank except for us, we wanted to take care of everyone before they went to bed. Jimin hung back, winking when he saw us go out the back door, down the stone path that led to the beach.

“Isn’t it funny how we end up here after a major life event?” you asked as you took my hand in yours, pulling me toward the shore.

You didn’t bother wearing shoes this time, you just wanted to let the water touch your feet. You regretted it the moment you realized it was freezing cold.

“Don’t laugh,” you squealed, looping your arm with mine before we walked away from the shore. I set the blanket down on the sand, sitting down before pulling you into my lap.

“Isn’t it beautiful, Tae?” you asked.

“Yeah,” I answered, not taking my eyes off of you. I’m sure you meant the moon, but nothing can compare to you.

“We made it, Tae. We really made it,” you laugh, throwing your head back onto my shoulder. My grip on your waist tightens.

We really did.

You turn the letter over, seeing the picture Taehyung was talking about. Smiling fondly, you had a picture of that day as well. A picture Jungkook had taken of you looking at Taehyung… he still made fun of you for looking like a love-sick puppy, but you don’t care.

You remember the night of your graduation, clearly. You reach out for the next letter, curious to see if he’s written about it as your cheeks heat up.

Y/n… I have no words.

None at all.

And yet…

Fuck, my head is still spinning, Y/n.

I don’t know what any of it means…

I…

I held you in my arms at the beach for a long, long time. You placed your head on my shoulder, your hands on my chest. I looked down at you, and you smiled. I wanted to tell you… I swear I did.

What kind of spell do you put me under, baby? I lose the ability to speak when you look at me like that. I couldn’t speak, I could barely breathe and then you kissed me.

Fuck, baby.

I missed the taste of your lips. I cupped your face, holding you close. You pushed me back onto the blanket, just like on prom night. I wasn’t as nervous as that night, but I hadn’t been with anyone since. I worried I wouldn’t be good enough; I said so.

“I haven’t been with anyone either, Taetae. Just kiss me, let me take your worries away,” you whispered, holding my face. Your eyes searched mine for any sign of nervousness, when you found none, you kissed me again. I swear I melt every time you take the lead.

I lost myself in your kisses, your hands unbuttoning my shirt until you pulled it off my shoulders. You pulled back to look at me, smiling bashfully.

You bite your lip, looking down before you gripped your shirt and threw it to the side. I tried not to ogle your chest, but I did anyway.

“Don’t just stare,” you laughed, pushing my shoulder. I fell back, chuckling as you climbed over me, your thighs on either side of my hips. “What’s so funny, Taetae?”

The words got caught in my throat, a groan escaping my lips instead as you ground your hips down on me. I saw stars, literally, as I looked up into the sky, thanking the gods for you. You kissed every inch of my skin, tugging my pants off and pining my wrists to the blanket. I was pliant for you, I would have done anything you asked of me and I did.

I still find myself blushing when I think of that night.

You sure are something else, baby.

Something else…

...you see how easy it is for me to get distracted, love? Thinking of you that night brings back so many emotions, it’s overwhelming. You fit so perfectly in my hands. Your lips on mine, our moans mixing perfectly.

Your fingers laced in my hair, my lips marking your skin in every place I’ve been. If I close my eyes, I can still see you writhing beneath me, screaming my name as you come undone on the sand. The waves crashing on the shore, drowning every delicious moan that left your lips.

You were amazing… fuck.

I couldn’t get enough of you, baby. I can never get enough of you, not now, not ever. I suppose that’s why we ended up spending the rest of the night on the beach. You fell asleep in my arms again, dressed in my shirt and curled up in my lap. I held you delicately, stroking your hair. I never wanted the moment to end, but as the sun rose and Jimin came to check on us, our little world shattered.

Jimin didn’t say a word, just gave me a look and mouthed, ‘tell her.’ I shook my head, I couldn’t. I couldn’t tell you… what if it meant nothing to you? I wouldn’t be able to cope. Jimin sighed before shaking his head and taking his leave.

You woke up shortly after, shivering in my arms. I pulled you closer, kissed the top of your head and we remained silent as the sun continued to rise.

I helped you get dressed, and we walked back to the house in silence.

Did it mean something to you?

You’re in tears when you finish reading the letter, setting it aside as you sob into your hands. Of course that night meant something to you! How could it not?!

You wanted to tell him so bad. You wanted to ask him what it meant, but you were met with silence. You left Taehyung alone for the rest of the day, focusing on hiding your hickeys. Not that it mattered, Jimin knew, and who knows how many more of your friends.

You wiped your tears. You had also overheard Jimin and Taehyung arguing. Jimin was trying to keep quiet but he couldn’t help but hiss, “what are you doing with Y/n?”

“Nothing, we’re just friends. It meant nothing,” Taehyung had hissed back in reply. That was all you needed to hear before you walked away. You ended up walking back out to the beach, watching the ocean waves until Yoongi found you. He didn’t say a word, just sat with you and watched the ocean until it was dinner time.

Jimin cornered me today…

He asked what last night meant for us… I lied and said nothing. I wish I hadn’t lied, it’s not like he believed me, anyway. You disappeared for the rest of the day with Yoongi. I don’t know if you’re mad at me for last night, but I hope you’re not.

I want to talk to you, but every time I ask what’s wrong; you say nothing. I don’t think you’ve ever been mad at me… I don’t like it. I don’t want you to be mad at me, especially since I don’t know why.

Maybe we can talk tonight?

I love you, Y/n.

Last night doesn’t change that.

Your phone buzzed, a text from Taehyung assuring you he’s safe. You send him a picture of Tannie and put your phone back down before grabbing another letter.

I talked to Y/n last night…

It didn’t go how I thought it would… not at all.

We were getting ready for bed and I asked if we could talk. She shrugged. I knew we were already off to a poor start.

“About last night…”

“Forget it happened, Tae. I just want to pretend it didn’t happen, okay? We can forget this, right?” My heart broke, but I nodded. If that’s what you wanted, I’d forget.

“Thanks,” you murmured before rolling over to face the wall. I watched you for a moment, sighing before I left the room.

I ended up at the beach. The waves seemed to taunt me for being alone.

“You okay?” Jungkook asked as he sat beside me. I shrugged.

“Jimin told me what happened…”

“Of course he did,” I huffed, annoyed.

“Did you tell her?” Jungkook grabbed a handful of sand in his palm, tilting it to pour back down before repeating the action.

“She wants to forget about it, Kook. She just wants to be friends,” I didn’t even feel the tears run down my cheeks until Jungkook pulled me into a hug, wiping my tears away with his shirt.

“I’m sorry, Tae. We were so sure she loved you…”

“I thought so too,” I sobbed.

“It’ll be okay. You’ve got us, Tae. You’ve got us.”

Jungkook stayed with me all night. I cried until I couldn’t anymore. Eventually, Jimin came to find us, draping a blanket over us before he sat beside us.

While our friends surrounded me, you were alone in our room crying your eyes out. Yoongi told me the next morning. You didn’t mention it and neither did I. Did you regret it that much, Y/n?

I’m sorry, love.

I never meant to hurt you...

<< previous / next >>

#the key to my drawer taehyung #smutcentralnet #taehyung fanfic #taehyung fanfiction #bts fanfiction #kim taehyung x you #taehyung x yn #taehyung smut #taehyung x reader #taehyung x reader insert #taehyung bf2l #best friend!au #best friend!taehyung #taehyung non idol au

280 notes · View notes

iwriteforthetincanman · 4 years

Text

Mandoctober Day 12: Jawa

A/N: This is just a random Din Djarin x female!reader that I decided to see from a different angle. Hope you enjoy!

As always this is for @leo-moon ‘s Mandoctober!!

Din wasn’t sure what he hated more. Maybe it was the sand getting stuck in his armor, the constant glinting of the sun off the beskar (making him easy to spot from far away) or maybe it was the fact his water supply ran out half an hour ago and he was already parched.

Nope, it was none of those things.

He just had to go and get caught in a trap set up by none other than the Jawas…

Yeah, you heard right, kriffing Jawas.

There was a reason Din preferred blasting them to smithereens on sight whenever he came across them...and it’s usually because they are stealing from him. This was not one of those times...but he had never so desperately wanted his pulse rifle.

Hanging next to the side of a cliff wasn’t how the Mandalorian planned on spending his evening. As the twin suns began to set, he tried to admire the view, if it weren’t for the gaping cavern underneath him. He waited for one of two things to happen: either the Jawas would come for him and attempt to strip him of his beskar or...he’d be left hanging here until he died of thirst or y’know...fell.

Either way he didn’t want to wait around forever, especially if he died of dehydration before the jawas showed up. Then they would take his beskar without a fight, it was an honorless death.

Besides that, he wasn’t gonna die because of kriffing Jawas.

Hearing a scuffle of rocks falling down the cliff side Din swung around.

“Who’s there?!” He spoke aloud, his voice dragging into a rasp. Damn, he didn’t realise how dry his throat was. Before he could prepare himself for a fight, a figure emerged from the shifting cliffside. They were wearing beige cloaks and a head wrap, to protect them from the sand he figured. A pair of goggles stared back at him, although they weren’t eyes he felt like he was hallucinating.

Even if the glass was reflective, he felt the piercing gaze of the eyes behind them.

As the figure drew closer, his vision started to fade altogether.

Then...everything went black.

---

What Mando didn’t expect was to wake up to a girl fighting with a couple of Jawas back in the middle of the desert.

He was just glad she hadn’t yanked his helmet off and that he was right side up once again.

Studying the girl, trying to stay as still as possible, he took in her features. The head wrap lay against her neck, goggles too and she was yelling in Jawaese. Fluent Jawaese, he noted. From what little information he could gather, they were fighting over him, well...his beskar at least.

That was when her gaze snapped over to him, trudging up the sand dune she slapped his helmet a few times.

“Hey, you awake in there?” Basic...now she was speaking basic.

“...yeah. Only barely.” He breathed, it felt like all he was breathing out was dust at this point.

“Kriff, we better get you some water. You got anything I can trade with the Jawas so they don’t take your armor?” This girl...wasn’t going to give him up?

“Uh...I got a few pulse rifle shots I picked up on Canto Bight.” They had been really expensive to buy too...but in comparison to his beskar (not to mention the offer of water tempted him more than anything) it was an easy trade to make.

“Good. Be right back.” Taking the shots from him, she slid back down to the Jawas. Only then did he notice that he was laying against some sort of creature (what she rode around on he guessed) and that they were sitting in the shadow of a giant sandcrawler.

All he could do was watch as this girl, a scavenger maybe, traded his stuff. That’s when he started to really take her in, her hair twisted into his mind, her eyes settling around his visor and her hands (although they were sandy) were strong. Din had no clue as to why his imagination was so vivid whilst he was around this woman...maybe he was losing his mind.

It sure felt like it.

Stumbling back up to him, she waved as the Jawas made off, the sandcrawler a distant memory as it sped off.

“Okay...now how about that drink of water?” You smiled. Kriff, when was the last time a beautiful woman smiled at him? It felt like his breath had been stolen from his lungs.

Or perhaps that was the dehydration talking.

“Please.” He gasped out.

“Shit, why don’t you take that helmet off? Give yourself a breather?” He knew you were offering out of kindness but he couldn’t help tensing up at this. Deliriousness thrown out the window, the creed stuck with him always.

“I-I can’t.” A weak muttering left his dry lips, your eyebrows scrunched up at this.

“How come? If you don’t mind me asking that is.” You weren’t forcing him but if he was desperately thirsty, surely it didn’t matter that much?

“My creed...I’m a Mandalorian.” Your demeanor changed at this. Din couldn’t help the thought of you changing your mind flashing across his. Not everyone had a positive opinion on Mandalorians, bounty hunters or otherwise.

“Oh...well, maybe if I blindfolded myself? And Zephora since she’s technically ‘another living thing’.” Surprisingly, you handled the situation with humor as you placed a blindfold around your eyes and your travel companion’s.

“...Thank you.” These were the first words he had said without the aid of his helmet. Although a breath of fresh air seemed to help he couldn’t help letting out a series of coughs. His throat felt like the desert itself.

“Woah there, do you need help drinking? I’ll get the canteen.” Using your hands to see, you searched your travel packs. There were four in total since Zephora was a fairly large creature, originally she was used for carrying heavy cargo across the sandy plains, but after you purchased her you gave her a break with her weight load.

“If...If it’s no trouble. I can’t...seem to move.” His voice sounded so dry against the air. Kneeling down beside him you searched his armor, reaching for his face, your fingertips brushed against his lips. He knew you were just trying to be helpful but the act felt so...intimate. If the blush that flamed across your face was anything to go by...you thought so too.

“Here, try to drink as much as you can. I’m not sure how long you were hanging about for.” Joking once again, Din gratefully accepted the lip of the canteen. Gulping down the lukewarm water, he smiled to himself. Water had never tasted so good before.

Humming to himself, you realised he was telling you to stop.

“Thank you...kriff, I don’t even know your name.” Din panted, his ability to speak freely returning.

“My name is Y/N Y/L/N...and I was wondering if you could help me off of this planet.”

57 notes · View notes

rpf-bat · 4 years

Text

You Can’t Keep My Friends

Pairing: Mikey Way x Reader

Genre: Romance, Drama

Summary: Written for Gothtober 2020, Day 4. Prompt: “Bat Country”.

It’s the summer of 2005, and you, and the other members of My Chemical Romance, are on Warped Tour. You start making friends with your tour-mates, Avenged Sevenfold. But, an unexpected comment from their guitarist, makes Mikey jealous.

You were relaxing on your tour bus, reading the new issue of Fangoria, when you heard a knock at the door. You got up, wondering who it could be.

“Hi,” greeted an unfamiliar, black-haired man, when you opened the door. “Is Mikey here?”

“Sorry,” you shrugged. “He’s not around. I think he went over to Fall Out Boy’s bus, to hang out with Pete.”

“That’s okay,” the man shrugged, brushing his bangs out of his eyes. “Oh, I guess I should introduce myself.”

“Yeah, what’s your name?” you wondered.

“I’m Zacky Vengeance,” the man smiled. “Ok….I’m actually Zacky Baker. But, you gotta admit, my stage name sounds cooler.”

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Vengeance,” you laughed. “I’m Y/N.”

“You plays drums for My Chem, right?” Zacky guessed.

“Yeah, that’s right,” you nodded.

“I’m in Avenged Sevenfold,” Zacky explained. “I play guitar.”

“Good to know,” you smiled. “Did you want me to tell Mikey, when I see him, that you stopped by?”

“I actually wanted to thank him,” Zacky confessed. “Our bassist, Johnny, broke one of his strings during soundcheck.”

“Oh, that sucks,” you said sympathetically.

“Yeah, and somehow, we couldn’t find our replacement strings anywhere!” Zacky frowned. “But, thankfully, Mikey let us borrow some of his.”

“Oh, that was nice of him,” you replied. He really is a kind person, always going out of his way to help others. It was one of the things you liked most about him.

“I wanted to give him this, as a thank you,” Zacky said, pulling a beer bottle out of his pants pocket. “Could you give it to him, for me?”

“Sure,” you shrugged, taking the bottle. “I’ll put it in the fridge for him, and let him know it’s there, when he comes back.”

“Thanks, Y/N,” Zacky smiled. “It was nice meeting you.”

“Yeah, you too, dude,” you replied. This was one of your favorite parts of Warped Tour - you always made new friends, with other bands.

Now, you thought, back to reading about the new Romero movie.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

You looked up from the page, when you heard the bus door open.

“Hey, Y/N,” Mikey greeted, wiping sweat off his forehead.

“Hey,” you smiled back. “Hot out there today?”

“Scorching,” Mikey laughed. “What’s up?”

“Zacky from Avenged Sevenfold was here,” you explained. “He gave me a beer, to give to you. He said thanks for helping them out.”

“Oh, sweet!” Mikey grinned. He went into the fridge, took out the beer, and twisted the cap open. “He got me my favorite kind, too!”

“I wish we had our own supply, this year,” you confessed.

“Well, Gerard’s trying to stay sober,” Mikey pointed out, taking a sip. “So, for his sake, we can’t really keep them on the bus, like we did last summer.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” you sighed. “I was being selfish.”

“If you want one, I’ll try and find you some,” Mikey offered, having another swig.

“Nah,” you declined. “It’s not like I need it that badly.”

“Speaking of which,” Mikey wondered, “where is Gerard?”

Your vocalist had been staying on the bus, like a hermit, for most of the tour. It had to be boring for him. But, you supposed it was the best way, for him to avoid temptation.

“Apparently there’s a comic book shop, not far from the venue,” you explained.

“Oh, so, he went shopping?” Mikey realized, finishing his drink, and tossing the bottle into a trash bin.

“Yeah,” you nodded. “I mean, we’re not going onstage, til like, eight o clock tonight, so he’s got plenty of time, to get there and back.”

“That’s true,” Mikey reasoned. “It’s kinda crazy, isn’t it? How when Warped Tour started last summer, we were on at like, midday, because nobody knew who we were…”

“And then our time slot got moved!” you recalled. “Because suddenly, Revenge was like, the hottest album of the year.”

“And now, this summer, we’re headlining,” Mikey said proudly.

“We really have come a long way,” you agreed.

“Since we have so much time on our hands,” Mikey suggested, “do you want to go check out Avenged Sevenfold’s set?”

“Sure!” you agreed. “Do we need to take a couple security guys with us?”

“Nah,” Mikey chuckled. “Just put your sunglasses on, and your hood up, and we’ll be fine.”

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

You joined the crowd, just as the band was starting to take the stage. The vocalist, you noticed, was a buff-looking guy in a muscle tank, wearing a backwards baseball cap. He was almost the antithesis of Gerard’s pretty-boy aesthetic.

“I’ve met him,” Mikey said, following your gaze. “He’s actually a pretty cool guy.”

“What’s his name?” you wondered.

“He calls himself M. Shadows,” Mikey replied.

“Edgy,” you joked.

“Maybe I’m the lame one, for using my real name,” Mikey considered. “I could have been, I dunno, Mikey Nightmare, or something.”

“I like your name,” you assured him, taking his hand.

Mikey blushed.

“WHAT’S UP, DENVER?!” M. Shadows screamed into the microphone.

“....Is that where we are today?” you blinked.

“I guess,” Mikey chuckled. “I’ll be honest, the cities start to blur together, after a while.”

“WHO WANTS TO HEAR A SONG OFF OUR NEW ALBUM?”, M. Shadows bellowed.

The crowd cheered.

“ALRIGHT!”,” the singer announced. “THIS SONG IS CALLED….BAT COUNTRY!”

You banged your head to the beat, as Avenged Sevenfold launched into the song:

Caught here in a fiery blaze, won't lose my will to stay

I tried to drive all through the night

The heat stroke ridden weather, the barren empty sights

No oasis here to see, the sand is singing deathless words to me

Can't you help me as I'm startin' to burn (all alone)

Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction

My confidence is leaving me on my own (all alone)

No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

After the set ended, you and Mikey showed your passes to their security guy, and walked backstage.

“Dude, your show was amazing!” Mikey complimented.

“Oh, hey, Mikey!” Zacky grinned. “Y/N, you came to watch, too?”

“Yeah,” you smiled. “He’s right, you guys really killed it up there today.”

“Thanks,” Zacky replied. “Oh, hey, let me introduce you to the rest of the guys!”

“Sure!” you nodded.

“This is my man, Synyster Gates,” Zacky introduced, indicating a man in a grey hat. “But, you can call him Syn.”

“Hi, Syn,” you greeted.

“Hey,” Syn waved. “Nice to meet you. I’m the other guitarist.”

“He’s lead guitar, and I’m rhythm guitar,” Zacky explained.

“Oh, so, basically, the same setup that Ray and Frank have,” you figured.

“I feel like I need to meet this Frank guy sometime,” Zacky quipped. “People keep telling me I look like him.”

“You kinda do,” you confessed. You glanced over at the drummer, who was sitting down in a folding chair. “Does he have a heavy metal stage name, too?”

“I’m the Reverend Tholomew Plague,” the drummer grinned. “But, my friends call me Rev.”

“Hi, Rev,” you chuckled. “I’m Y/N.”

“Nice to meet you,” Rev replied.

“I’m Johnny Christ,” said a third man, who sported a fauxhawk. “Hey, Mikey, thanks again for the assist earlier!”

“No problem, dude,” Mikey said casually. “Where’d Shadows run off to?”

“He went to get drinks for everybody,” Zacky told him. “I’ll text him, and tell him to bring two extra, for you guys.”

“Thanks,” you smiled.

Just then, a summer breeze blew through the backstage area, sending Syn’s hat, flying off his head.

“Shit!” Syn swore, watching his hat blow further away, back onto the main stage. “This is why I hate outdoor venues.”

“I’ll go get that for you,” you offered.

“Thanks,” Syn said gratefully. “Quick, before it blows over the barricade!”

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

You ducked past the crew members, who were taking down Avenged Sevenfold’s banners, and preparing the stage for the next band. The Offspring, if you weren’t mistaken, were supposed to go on in an hour.

A tech was taking down Rev’s drum kit, and setting up Atom Willard’s. You spotted the hat, next to the bass drum.

“Excuse me,” you muttered. The drum tech got out of your way, and let you take the hat.

“Oh my god!” you heard a fan gasp, who was still by the barricade. “That’s Y/N, from MCR!”

You turned, looking at the gaggle of teenagers. They had probably stuck around, so they didn’t lose their front row seats.

“Y/N!” a second fan called out. “Will you please sign my shirt?”

“Sure,” you smiled. You leaned over the edge of the stage, taking a marker that was held out to you. You signed your name on the blushing teen’s band shirt.

“Thank you so much!” he gasped. “I can’t wait to see you and the guys perform tonight!”

“Thank you for coming to see us,” you replied.

“Y/N, will you sign my ticket stub?” another fan pleaded.

“Yeah, why not?” you acquiesced. You stayed by the barricade for a few moments, signing autographs, and posing for pictures.

“Alright, guys,” you said finally. “I really do need to go give Synyster his hat back.”

“Ok!” the fans said agreeably. “Thank you for taking time for us! Say hi to Gerard and Frankie for us when you see them!”

“Will do,” you chuckled. The MCRmy were such nice kids. It made you feel special, to be loved by such a great group of people.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

You were about to turn the corner, and re-enter the backstage area. But, you froze, when you heard your name. You realized, that the guys were talking about you.

“So,” you heard Zacky ask, “is Y/N single?”

“Uh….,” Mikey hesitated. “Yeah, as far as I know, she’s not seeing anyone.”

“That’s surprising,” Syn commented. “She’s, like, really pretty.”

“If I asked her out,” Zacky wondered, “do you think she’d say yes?”

What?!, you stifled a gasp. Zacky was interested in you?

“No!” Mikey blurted out. “You definitely don’t want to do that!”

“Why not?” you snapped, revealing herself. “You think I’d be a super annoying person to date?”

“Y/N?” Mikey gasped, turning his head around, towards you. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough,” you frowned. “Why are you warning people not to ask me out? Am I that unattractive, when I don’t have my stage makeup on?”

“No!” Mikey said quickly. “Fuck, that’s not what I meant, either!”

“Then, what did you mean?” you demanded.

“I….,” Mikey trailed off, his whole face turning red. “I can’t tell you.”

“Bullshit,” you barked. “Here’s your stupid hat, Syn.”

You practically threw it at the guitarist, then turned, and began walking away.

“Where are you going?” Mikey cried, following you.

“Back to the bus!” you growled, walking faster.

“Y/N, please, slow down!” Mikey begged, jogging to keep up with you.

“No! Buzz off!” you told him. Your cheeks burned.

Does he think I’d be a shitty, clingy girlfriend? you wondered. Why would he tell some complete stranger, that I’m not worth dating? I should’ve known...he’d never be interested in me.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

You climbed back onto the bus, and immediately threw yourself into your bunk. You pulled the curtains around you, as if you were going to sleep.

Mikey pulled the curtain back again, and sat beside you.

“Can we please talk?” he implored you.

“What is there to talk about?” you huffed.

“Y/N, I’m sorry,” Mikey said gently. “Look...do you really want to date Zacky? If that’s what will make you happy….I’ll go back there, and I’ll tell him to shoot his shot. I can even give him your number.”

“I don’t want to date Zacky,” you confessed.

I want to date you, you stupid man. You wished you could tell him that, but you didn’t have the guts. But, that will never happen.

“I didn’t tell Zacky, not to ask you out, because I think you’re annoying, or unattractive,” Mikey explained.

“Then, why did you say it?” you demanded, wiping tears on your sleeve.

“I said it because….,” Mikey hesitated.

“Spit it out,” you insisted.

“I said it, because I wanted to ask you out myself,” Mikey said finally.

“Wh…..What?!”

“I’ve been trying to find the balls, to ask you out, all summer,” Mikey confessed, reddening. “But, I could never find the right time, or the words. I’m an idiot.”

“You’re not an idiot,” you said softly, moving closer to him.

“I have no right, to tell you who to be with,” Mikey sighed. “Y/N, I hope I haven’t ruined our friendship, by telling you how I feel about you. I understand, if you aren’t interested in…”

“I’m interested,” you interrupted.

“Huh?” Mikey’s eyes widened behind his glasses.

“I’ve been interested in you for a long time,” you confessed. “I just didn’t have the balls to tell you, either.”

We’re both idiots.

You leaned over, and lay your lips on his. He kissed you back, eagerly grabbing you, pulling you closer. You kissed him, again, and again.

“....So,” Mikey gasped breathlessly, coming up for air, “does this mean you and I are dating now?”

“Now,” you grinned, grabbing him by the collar, “and forever.”

#mikey way x reader #mikey way imagine #band member reader #gothtober

99 notes · View notes

jjmaybanksblog · 4 years

Text

Lost Sweater- Kiara Carrera

Kiara x female reader

Summary: Alternative Universe where when one person loses something, their soulmate receives it.

Word count: 2,028

Warnings: None

B/N: Brother/ boy name

Y/N: Your name

Y/A: Your age

Soulmate. A simple word that brings many thoughts to the brain. Someone who you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with, happily. Someone who will treat you in ways you could only dream of. Many people believe in them, others don't. You grew up a non-believer never understanding why God would make something so amazing, such a difficult task for people. Your friends all around you had begun receiving their lost items, all of them meeting their soulmates, meanwhile you remained confused and alone.

You were a non-believer until one day your missing sweater wound up on your bed with a note attached to it.

"You must have misplaced this, I was confused when I was sleeping and the cotton fell on my face, fun fact I almost suffocated. Anyways, hi. This must belong to my soulmate, damn that's crazy. In my entire life I never believed in this shit, my parents telling me about how they met because my dad found and returned a necklace that meant a lot to my mom. I always thought it was bullshit until recently. Here's your sweater back, I 'lost it' throwing it out my window. I hope to hear from you soon.

Your soulmate"

You read the letter over and over as the thoughts finally sunk in. Maybe you wouldn't be alone after all. Gently biting your bottom lip, you suddenly felt a rush of adrenaline run through your body. You ran out of the room and into your brother's room.

He was sitting down at his desk when you barged in. He turned around towards you, only to be nearly tackled in a hug. "Who are you and what have you done with my sister. You barely hug me." B/N asked as he saw the letter in your hand. "Ohhh shit. You got your soulmate." He mumbled, putting the pieces together.

"I'm not gonna end up alone!" You smiled. Your brother knew of your fear. You had talked to him before, explaining your thought process about this all. You were afraid you would die alone, not knowing what it would be like to love and be loved. You knew it was irrational, but growing up you never pictured someone falling in love with you. You took it to heart so you just shut every romantic aspect out of your life.

Your brother congratulated you before you ran back into your room, writing on a lined piece of paper.

"Dear soulmate,

Wow. Just writing those two words felt foreign. Sorry about my sweater almost killing you, I'm just a clumsy person that loses things a lot, but I'm glad you're okay. I also was a non-believer. I always saw the people around me finding their soulmates and being happy, meanwhile I was in the corner watching all my friends find the one. For the longest time I was convinced that maybe I just wasn't meant to have one, but knowing you're out there makes me feel... safe. Attached to this note is a picture of me, I figured maybe if you're curious enough you would want to know what I look like. My name is Y/N I'm Y/A years old and I can't wait to find out who my soulmate is. Xx

Y/N

You took an image of yourself and stapled it to the back of the letter. Opening your window that led to her backyard, you grabbed a scrunchie and wrapped it around the note. You carelessly threw the note and picture out of the window and watched it effortlessly fly away in the night sky. You fell onto your bed, staring happily at your bedroom ceiling.

Slowly drifting off to sleep, your eyes snapped open when you heard a soft popping sound echoed by your desk. Rubbing your eyes, you stood up and walked over. Another letter was displayed on the wood, you smiled softly as you sat down. Your eyes scanned the letter as you read it out loud.

Y/N,

Wow. Just wow. I can't even think of words to form right now. You're absolutely breathtaking. I'm not gonna lie I wasn't expecting a girl, but God, do I feel blessed knowing that you're my soulmate. Your letter and picture were actually soaking wet. But it smelled like salt water, so I'm guessing you live possibly on a coast. I live in the Outer Banks in North Carolina. When I got your letters it just smelled like home. I wanna go traveling, to you, out of the country, just explore new things. I totally understand how you felt about feeling like you're not gonna find a soulmate. I've watched more than half of my high school senior class find their soulmates during the year. Meanwhile I was acting like everything was completely fine and I wasn't distraught. I should be asleep right now, but I'm dying to talk to you. Get to know you. Later on if you'd like, I would love to call you. To hear your voice and your laugh. I think you should get some rest as well. I have no clue what time it is where you are but I want my love to be well rested. Goodnight Xx

Kiara Carrera

You flipped the paper around to see a beautiful mixed girl with carmel colored skin. Her hair was curly and beautiful, flowing from wind. Your eyes were drawn to her smile, you could tell she was laughing and you wished to be able to hear her laugh.

For days on end you and Kiara had been 'losing things' with letters attached to them. Tonight was the night where Kiara was going to call you. Both of you were on the edge of their seats, your hearts beating rapidly. Kiara's hands shook as she dialed your number, pausing between each number.

After what felt like forever, the phone began to ring. You audibly gasped at the sound of a bell ringing. You hesitantly picked up your cell phone that was placed on the bedside dresser. "H-hello?" You spoke into the phone. Kiara broke out in a grin, "Y/F/N, Y/L/N." Your name rolled off her tongue, goosebumps rising on your arms and back of your neck.

"Kiara Carrera" you spoke back, Kiara internally squeaking at the soft, velvety voice that spoke her name. "My god your voice.. okay I totally don't mean to sound weird but it's just so calming and relaxing. God okay wow hi, I never thought I'd see the day where I'd be on the phone with my soulmate." Kiara spoke as she nervously chewed her bottom lip.

"Honestly, me too. Growing up I always... ugh I don't mean to sound like I was sympathy or attention, I always grew up insecure and pictured myself as someone who could never be loved. And everyday I always saw or heard about people finding their soulmates in different ways. It went on for years and everyday I lost hope, but now I'm here talking to you and I feel nauseous, but in a good nervous way. Does that make sense?" You asked, rapidly shaking your leg.

"No I totally get it, I feel really hot right now mostly because I don't know what to say to you. Like my whole life I've planned on things to say but now that I'm talking to you I have no clue what to say or how to say it."

Kiara threw herself on her bed, her smile never leaving her face as she closed her eyes, listening to your soothing voice. "So, tell me about Kiara, what it's like to live in the Outer Banks?"

4 months later

After months of planning, you had managed to save up enough money for a plane ticket to OBX. You were currently walking off the plane and into the terminal, your heart beating a mile a minute. You stood to the side as you were about to text Kiara, asking where she was.

That was until you locked eyes with the girl you'd recognize from the pictures. Kiara's heart felt like it was about to leap out of her chest as your eyes met. You held your suitcase tightly as you made a run towards your girl.

You released your items mid run as you opened your arms out. With one swift motion Kiara picked you up in her arms, holding you close to her. Your legs wrapped around her waist as you held each other tightly. "You're real." Kiara mumbled into your neck as she held back tears.

You pulled away from the hug, your legs still around her torso. Her fingers brushed their way through your hair, subconsciously leaning into her touch. Kiara pecked your cheek as she placed you down onto your feet. Your hands intertwined as you guys walked to her car, your thumb rubbing over her knuckles.

They spent the car ride debating on which Beyonce song was truly the best. Kiara blasted the music as loud as she could take as she sped down roads to her house.

She drove past the beach, your eyes not leaving the beautiful view in front of you. Your head was turned to the window as colors of the sand and the ocean blurred by. "You want to go?" Kie asked you as she saw you admiring the waves.

You were left speechless, only able to nod your head.

As soon as they got to Kiara's house, her family was waiting at the door to be introduced. You felt an overwhelming amount of support from her family, none of them giving you attitude or being rude. No one was being homophobic, they were so welcoming towards you which made this day even better.

"Let's go get changed. Bathrooms down the hall and to the left." You dragged your suitcase behind you as you entered the bathroom. You quickly changed into a teal bikini, both pieces of fabric covering you properly, throwing on an oversized shirt for comfort. Kiara grabbed 2 towels and waited for you at this point her face ache from smiling but she couldn't stop.

You walked back out, giving your girl a thumbs up. Joining Kie in the car, she set off to the beach which was only 5 minutes away. It was currently 7:42 p.m. and the sun was beginning to set. The sky was painted in a mixture of purples and pinks, splashes of orange thrown into it as well. You laid down the two towels and sat down on one of them, patting the space next to you.

Kie sat down, instinctively wrapping her arm around you. You rested your head on her shoulder, sitting there in a comfortable silence. You were still in awe at the sight, the waves rising and then quickly falling onto the sand. This was everything compared to the beaches in New Jersey. The birds that flew above, diving down at any food they could find. The sounds of the waves crashing relaxed you to another level.

"I can't believe you get to see this everyday." You whispered. "You could get to see it everyday too. Well, one day. Well only if you want of course." Kiara nervously stumbled on her words, not knowing how to recover from that. "I'd love that." You simply said, looking at her. The sunlight reflected perfectly off her skin, giving her a sort of Golden look.

"Kiara?" You questioned, your eyes falling to her lips. "Hmm?" "Can I kiss you?" Kiara was taken back at your question, but immediately answered by moving in toward her. She leaned forward, her lips brushing against yours. You made the final move and pushed slightly so you two were finally kissing. Both of you melted into each other's touch as you smiled into the kiss. You two shared a passionate kiss for a few seconds before pulling away, your noses gently touching. You pressed a kiss to her nose as she shyly bit her bottom lip.

You rested your head back on her shoulder, staring back into the sunset. "I'm really glad I lost that sweater." You admitted.

"I am too."

87 notes · View notes